Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

“Hyunjinnie,” A frown settled between his brows, eyes still shut tight, trying to scoot away from the soft voice, only for the voice to get closer this time with a hand running through his unwashed tangled hair. He let out a loud whine.

“Hyuuung, stop. ‘m greasy, ‘s gross…”

“Come on, drama queen, wake up, you need to get ready.” With the frown still settled between his brows, Hyunjin scrubbed at his face, two closed fists rubbing at his
eyes until they felt raw and saw many, many different colours. At least he didn’t get blinded by sunlight this time. Someone must’ve closed the shutter after he fell asleep.

“We’re gonna land soon.”

Right.

As if to prove his point, the scratchy speakers let out the voice of the pilot, getting everyone’s attention in their cabin.

“Ladies and gentlemen, as we start our descent, please make sure your seat backs and tray tables are in their full upright position. Make sure your seat belt is securely fastened and all carry-on luggage is stowed underneath the seat in front of you or the overhead bins. Thank You…”

He almost chuckled at the pilot’s obvious accent as she continued to revise the same exact speech in her native language, German if he remembered correctly. They’d been on so many flights in the last couple of days that he had to take a second to remember where they were flying to this time.

He squinted at the small screen ahead, the bold ‘No Smoking’ sign blinking in red. Regaining enough focus after a few seconds, he could finally see the route to the airport on a map shown on the screen, next to it an estimated time of arrival flashing in white.

Landing at 11:55 ! Please fasten your seatbelts!

Rubbing his eyes, Hyunjin groaned, rolling his neck from side to side, wishing
away the cricks and sores that came with having to sleep upright on uncomfortable airplane seats for, almost five days now... or had it been a week already? He wasn’t sure.

Right then he finally started to get feeling back in his whole body, groaning in pain as he tried to straighten his stiff, bunched up legs from under himself. His habit of curling up in his sleep won’t let up even when he is sleeping upright on an airplane seat it seems. An immensely appreciated bottle of water dropped on his lap. He hummed in appreciation.

“Ladies and gentlemen, we have just been cleared to land at Hamburg International Airport. Please make sure one last time your seat belt is securely fastened. The flight attendants are currently passing around the cabin to make a final compliance check and pick up any remaining...”

He cursed under his breath as soon as he managed to put his feet down, his muscles screaming in pain from the previous position he’d been sleeping in. Mainly his behind. How long had he been sleeping like that? He reached a hand to his ass, trying to massage the pain away, groaning as he felt the now almost alarmingly flat surface.

A loud snort came from beside him. He shot a glare at his best friend, seeing how he was trying, and simultaneously failing, to keep his smile hidden. He swatted at him with a prominent pout on his face, the older shamelessly laughing in his face. He groaned in annoyance, resuming his hand back to his stiff ass.

“What? I’m allowed to laugh! It’s your own fault. I told you to lean your head on my thighs and lay down, but no, you wanted to stay awake and watch the frickin’ clouds. As if we haven’t had enough of that the past week already.”

“Hyung, if anything, you’re the sole reason for my whole body feeling like a stick. If you’d just gotten first class,” he groans as a muscle in his back pulls, “…we wouldn’t have had all these stupid problems.” He let out a small yelp at the smack on the back of his neck.

“If it was about our comfort, I wouldn’t have made us fly in circles for a whole week, idiot.”

“At least my butt would’ve come out of it unharmed- Ya!“ Yugyeom smacked him again, this time on the side of his head, opening his mouth to say something, probably scold him further, but he got cut off by a flight attendant kindly asking them to put their seatbelts on.

He nodded to the young woman with a reassuring smile for her to leave, moving the thin blanket draped on his lap aside in search of the seat belt straps.

“Here.” Yugyeom handed him his black cap, a black mask inside. He reluctantly put them both on, trying to ignore the disgusting smell of his dirty hair coming from the cap, the water he just drank swishing in his empty stomach as the plane gradually started to sink back down onto the ground.

He took another look at the screens in front of them. Just a couple more minutes and he could finally walk again. He hadn’t thought he’d miss anything more than he misses walking at this moment in his life.

“Hand me your phone and wallet.”

“Why?” He questioned, even though he knew exactly why.

“No questions. Come on, hand it over.”

“Hyung, you already destroyed my sim card. What use does my empty phone have when I can’t even call anyone?”

Yugyeom didn’t reply, just gave him a stern glare that clearly indicated he did not appreciate Hyunjin not cooperating, which drew out a small, disgruntled whine from the younger as he reached into his back pocket to retrieve his dead phone.

“Fine.” He grumbled.

“It’s not like I can use it anyway...” He handed it to him with the headphones still attached. It died on the first flight so Hyunjin didn’t understand why Yugyeom still wanted to have it when he wouldn’t let him charge it at the airports either.

“Good.” Yugyeom detached the headphones and threw them back on Hyunjin’s lap before putting the phone in his back pocket, stretching his hand over to him again gesturing for something else.

“Why give me the headphones when I don’t even have a device to use them with?”

“Wallet.”

He scoffed. First, it was his Sim-Card, then his laptop, and now his phone and wallet too...

He wasn’t getting any of them back either, was he?

“Why do you need my wallet?”

“Hyunjin, can you just listen to me once without questioning something?” The older snapped, making Hyunjin sigh in defeat.

It wasn’t often that Yugyeom snapped at him, so when he did, Hyunjin knew it was not the time to be playing around. He is just doing his job, Hyunjin knows, despite that, he couldn’t help but feel a small pang of... something in his chest whenever it happened. It made Hyunjin see him as what he was actually supposed to be. His bodyguard. Not his best friend, who he’d grown up with. Hyunjin hated that feeling.

The last week had done a great job of reminding him of that…

“Hyung, is taking my wallet really necessary? My cards won’t even work-“The impact of the plane tires hitting the asphalt ground cut him off mid-sentence. Yugyeom snatched the wallet from his hand, not even paying him any mind as he stuffed it in his jacket pocket.

Hyunjin rubbed his scalp lightly, already giving up on his previous request, knowing it wouldn’t change anything anyway.

“Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to Hamburg International Airport. Local time is 11:56 and the temperature is 11ºC in Hamburg, dropping from 11 to 8 in the evening, with a 10% chance of rain. For your safety and comfort, please remain seated with your seat belts fastened until the…”

Blocking out the pilot’s voice, he rolled his shoulder to release some pent-up tension. He noticed Yugyeom trying to tell him something, but his voice was blending into the background along with the pilot’s speech as if underwater.

Gesturing for him to wait, he yawned to unblock his ears. With a soft pop, his hearing went back to normal so he looked to his left to see Yugyeom getting his bag from under his seat, opening it in search of what he assumed would be their passports, Yugyeom confirming his thought when he checked both to find out which belonged to who.

“You know the drill. We blend into the crowd, heads down, quickly get through the security gates and out of the luggage claim without attracting any attention.”

He zipped the bag back up and checked under the seats to see if they forgot anything else, which was unlikely since Hyunjin literally had nothing with him except his wallet and phone, which Yugyeom had taken the liberty to confiscate, along with his laptop.

He had not been given any time to pack anything or even change his clothes before they had to leave. He’d been just finishing in the studio when Yugyeom had burst in the room and dragged him out like a rag doll, so he’d just taken whatever was in his reach at that moment, which had been the bag he usually took to practice containing his electronics, a water bottle and his sweaty hair towel still around his neck. He was taken straight to the airport in a cab driven by Yugyeom himself, without a single explanation as to where they were going.

Hyunjin had no say in the matter whatsoever. He knew he was just supposed to listen and follow the lead in these kinds of situations, as much as he hated to do that, he is just doing his job, it’s for my own safety, he told himself.

Soon after the plane completely stopped, the passengers started unloading their carry-ons from the overhead bins and making a line to exit the plane, unsurprisingly crowding the path to the exit.

Not that it mattered anyway. Yugyeom always made sure to get them seats close to the exit doors so they would have an easy and fast exit should anything unexpected happen.

Granted, that wouldn’t have even been a concern, had Yugyeom chosen to just take one of the many private jets waiting for them on command, however, as they’ve been flying around in circles for the past week, Hyunjin thought it was less the matter of urgency to get somewhere and more the urgency to get away from something… which was frankly unsettling.

Not to mention Yugyeom’s worrying behaviour.

He felt a hand tug at his wrist as he stood up, following Yugyeom out of the plane, two flight attendants bidding them goodbye at the door as they followed the other passengers ahead of them, entering the glass tunnel connecting them to the airport.

Taking a look outside at his surroundings, there wasn’t anything interesting that caught his eyes. He could see more airplanes and some empty mini carts parked around. The weather was slightly cold, and the sky cloudy, casting a grey cast over everything, which was as dull as the weather could get.

Compared to the beautiful city lights that had greeted them at JFK airport or the cold foggy night sky they’d arrived to in London, this was, for lack of a better word, extremely boring.

Midway through the tunnel, he heard a loud ringing coming from Yugyeom’s pocket, startling them both, him from the view outside, Yugyeom from looking around like a madman, scanning every single person in his periphery as if they were about to attack him.

He momentarily let go of Hyunjin’s hand, struggling to silence the loud burner fast enough. As soon as he got a hold of the phone and pressed it to his ear, he grabbed Hyunjin’s wrist again as if he were a helpless child who’d get lost if someone wasn’t constantly keeping an eye on him. Hyunjin rolled his eyes in annoyance, deciding to just follow him for now. He will complain later.

“Where’re you guys?”

That piqued Hyunjin’s interest. He hadn’t known they were meeting someone here.

“Second floor where?!”

Who’s he talking to? Is someone here to pick us up?

“Well, where the fuck are the bathrooms? Give me straight directions!”

The person on the other end yelled something back at Yugyeom and Hyunjin snorted at how Yugyeom flinched back from the phone immediately, a grimace clear on his face.

At this point, Hyunjin knew exactly who was on the other end. No one else could get that kind of reaction out of Yugyeom. He felt excitement bubble in his stomach.

“Hyung, I’m sorry, now can you please, please be a little more clear? Do we just go in whatever bathroom we see first when we get out of luggage claim?”

He could hear a clear ‘NO!’ being shouted out from Mark’s side and this time he didn’t try to contain his chuckles.

“I don’t know from which Terminal they’re gonna let us out. You were the one waiting for us, why didn’t you check the arrivals?”

As they got closer to the end of the glass tunnel, a tall, built woman in a matching blue jacket and pants directed them to a long hallway, a passport check sign at the end of the hall. Yugyeom just opted on following the rest of the passengers until lines were forming to get past the gate.

“Is it close to a store or something I can ask directions for?”

Yugyeom turned to check on him for a second as if he wasn’t already pulling him by his wrist. He pressed his passport in Hyunjin’s hand as they got in line to pass through the security check.

“Ok. Got it.”

Yugyeom finally let go of his wrist, pushing Hyunjin in front of himself in line instead, his new grip on Hyunjin’s shoulder not letting up. Hyunjin sighed as he got ready for his check, lightly shaking his head at how Yugyeom was acting. If they didn’t want to attract attention, Yugyeom had to stop acting so paranoid and suspicious.

“I gotta hang up, we’ll see you in a bit...”

Oh my God. We’ll see them in a bit?!? The hyungs are ACTUALLY here to pick them up?

“I won’t, don’t worry... k bye.”

“Is Mark Hyung here to pick us up? Was that our last flight?” He turned his head back to question the older, curiosity and excitement evident in his wide eyes.

“Sorta...” Yugyeom mumbled back hesitantly. He didn’t have enough time to analyse the hesitant look on Yugyeom’s face before he was being called to the front of the booth, a man looking to be in his 40s, staring him down asking for his passport and ID, which he immediately slid through the small opening of the glass barrier. Hyunjin took off his mask for the man to see his face clearly.

“Hyunjin Hwang.“

The sound of his name butchered by the man’s German accent made him look up from staring at the way the man was absolutely destroying his poor passport bending it all the way back just to see the first page.

That was enough for him to immediately develop a feeling of contempt for the bitch behind the glass barrier, mourning his previously well kept, pretty passport.

The guy looked like he couldn’t care less about his passport’s now permanently open state, a bored look plastered on his face. He looked down at his passport and back up a couple times trying to match the picture to his face.

He tried not to glare too hard at the bitch.

Once he was satisfied, he started typing on his keyboard, scanning his passport before looking up again.

“You are still underage. Are you travelling alone?”

Seriously, was destroying his passport not enough? What the hell did the guy want from him…

“Ah, no, sir.”

“Who’s with you then?”

“My legal guardian. He’s standing behind me.” He turned to Yugyeom, who was watching their interaction with hawk eyes.

“Tell him to come forward.” Before Hyunjin could even react, Yugyeom was standing next to him, sliding down his mask and nodding at the man behind the booth in greeting, which the man didn’t care to return.

“You are his guardian?”

“Yes, sir. I have the documents to prove if you-“

“No, that’s alright. Your passport?” Before the man could finish his sentence, Yugyeom was already sliding his passport through the glass booth over to the guy.

He went through the same process with Yugyeom, checking his picture and date of birth, typing something on his keyboard again then scanning the passport on the same device.

“Traveling through Europe for the first time together?” He opened their passports’ last pages, once again breaking the poor things open (seriously what’s with this guy?), blinking through the Schengen stamp they got at Gatwick Airport on their first flight from Australia.

“Ah, yes. This is our fifth stop.” The guy looked up, a confused frown weighing on his brows.

“You got into the Schengen area three days ago through... Amsterdam?”

“Hmm.” Grumpy checks both of their passports matching the stamps together.

“And you flew out to the US on the same night?”

This was exactly what they were trying to avoid. Of course, this would look suspicious to people. Who in their right mind would put themself through that kind of hell? He looked at Yugyeom to see him wearing a complete nonchalant mask on his face, a complete 180 from just minutes ago when he got the call from Mark.

“Yes, sir. It’s fashion week right now and this guy right here is a very in-demand model. Is there a problem?”

Leave it to Yugyeom’s poker face to get them out of anything. Although Hyunjin didn’t know how the guy still bought it, considering the way he looked right now in his all-black, loose workout clothes that looked like they hadn’t been washed in a few weeks, not to mention the dark bags he was sporting under his eyes and the dry ass skin, the result of living on planes for a whole week without any skincare, not even a moisturizer.

I’m so getting back at him for not letting me buy a moisturizer at duty-free, my skin is gonna suffer for weeks.

“How long are you planning to stay here for your visit?”

“Oh.. we’re just stopping by for a quick shoot, sir. You know, the busy life of models..” Yugyeom gave the bitch a fake smile just as his computer pinged with a sound of approval, the man opening up both of their passports again, oh how Hyunjin wanted to throw something at him right now, giving both an entry stamp and passing them back through the booth.

“Very well then, welcome to Hamburg.”

“Have a nice rest of your day!” Yugyeom bowed slightly as he accepted both passports and grabbed Hyunjin’s wrist again, directing a fake smile at the officer as he dragged him away through the gates leading them to luggage claim.

As soon as they were out of sight, Yugyeom started rushing them to the closest exit, not bothering with the luggage claim since they didn’t have anything with them anyway.

The doors opened to a crowd waiting behind a railing for their loved ones with roses, balloons and ‘welcome back home’ banners, which Yugyeom completely ignored, making a B-line for the first information screen in sight.

“Hyung can’t we get something to eat?“ He whined as they passed a Starbucks and a couple other cafés running through the crowd of people in the long hallway.

“Now’s not the time Jinnie we gotta move.”

Yugyeom led them to the left side of the hallway to check the next information banner and started dragging him again as soon as he found what he was looking for.

“But I missed the plane's last meal-“

“Hyung will get you something on the jet.”

“Another flight?” Yugyeom didn’t need to look at him to know this wasn’t Hyunjin’s usual whining. Sure, Hyunjin was hungry, sleep-deprived and exhausted from the number of unnecessarily long flights they had in the last couple of days, but those things were trivial when it came to his anxiety.

He’d been kept in the dark this whole time with no way to find out what was going on. Yugyeom kept telling him the Guard was dealing with it and that all they had to do was go off the grid for a couple of days until it blew over, but that didn’t really calm him down much since Hyunjin wasn’t aware of what was happening in the first place.

He’d been on edge the whole week and the way Yugyeom was acting wasn’t helping either. He’d been successful, keeping all the dark thoughts away for as long as he could, telling himself he didn’t know anything for sure yet and should therefore just listen to Yugyeom and stay calm, but that could only work for so long. The uncertainty was making him go crazy.

Yugyeom’s grip tightened on his arm for a second before he let go to squeeze his hand instead.

“This is the last one baby, I promise.”

Yugyeom’s words only worried him more, his suspiciously melancholic tone making a sense of dread grow in his gut. Before he could question him further, Yugyeom stopped.

They’d finally reached the end of the main hallway, seeing a big green S sign, leading to what he presumed were the underground trains, but Yugyeom dragged him in the opposite direction into a seemingly closed off narrow hallway leading to the bathrooms.

Yugyeom knocked a familiar rhythm on the door, pushing him inside when the door immediately opened in response and next thing he knew, there were arms wrapped around his neck engulfing him in a tight hug. He chuckled and bent down to wrap his own arms around his skinny Hyung, squeezing back just as tightly.

“Oh my God! When did you grow so tall?! Look at you!” Mark squealed in his ear. He giggled in his Hyung’s neck, swaying back and forth in relief and excitement at seeing him after so long.

“Hyung, we really don’t have time for this-“

Mark slightly pulled away from the hug, directing an annoyed glare at Yugyeom over Hyunjin’s shoulder.

“Hi, babe! It’s so nice to finally be reunited with you after so long! I’ve missed you too! In fact, so much, that after not seeing you for over six months, the first words coming out of my mouth are ‘Hyung, we really don’t have time for this...”

Yugyeom sighed fondly, wrapping his arms around his boyfriend’s waist, dragging him away from Hyunjin and into his own arms.

“How’s my lovely Hyung been, hmm?”

“Great! Other than the fact that I haven’t been able to sleep for a whole week worrying about what my dumbass boyfriend has gotten himself into this time...”

“I missed you too.” He kissed Mark on the side of his head and that’s when Hyunjin realized he should probably be giving them some privacy, but before he could think up a plan to disappear without them noticing, he heard loud footsteps coming down the hallway.

He flinched when Yugyeom suddenly turned to him, pushing him into a stall and slamming the door shut in his face. “What the hell?”

“Shh quiet. Don’t make a sound and do not under any circumstances come out until I come get you.” He could hear Yugyeom slowly stepping away from the stall. He huffed in annoyance, leaning his head back against the wall listening for other sounds. What made him start panicking was the unmistakable sound of guns being loaded.

They’re not being serious, are they? In an airport?! What the hell is going on?

“Do you have a spare muffler?”

“Duffle left pocket.”

“Guys it’s just me. Calm your horses.”

No fucking way. 

“And try to be less obvious next time, Hyung I could literally hear you squealing down the hall.” He peered through the small crack in the door first and when his thoughts were confirmed, slammed the door wide open and ran to the older.

“Now w- Oh my God!” He jumped on his unsuspecting Hyung, almost suffocating him in his embrace.

“Look at the baby! You brat! Have you been taking growth vitamins?! When the hell did you get so tall?” Jackson gushed, holding onto him so tight he thought his clothes were gonna rip. He couldn’t stop his giggles from escaping. He was not expecting to see so many familiar faces in one day, let alone two of his favourite people in the world.

“Aish I missed you so much! Look at you!” Jackson pulled away for a second just to squish his cheeks and hug him again, this time swaying him left to right.

“Ya! You little shit! I told you to wait inside until I come to get you.” Yugyeom scolded, smacking him upside the head again, but he couldn’t care less because he was finally reunited with his hyungs after so long nothing could dampen his mood.

“Jesus Christ, I missed your cute little ass.”

“Hyuuung…” Hyunjin whined fondly, resting his chin on Jackson's shoulder still holding on tight. Jackson responded by lifting one of his hands off the younger's waist to the back of Hyunjin’s head, caressing him behind his ear just like he always used to when Hyunjin was younger. He had missed clinging on to his Hyungs like this without having to worry he was annoying them.

“I missed you so much.” He whispered.

“We missed you more, bun.” Jackson pressed gentle kisses on his head and Hyunjin all but melted. It made Hyunjin almost completely relax in his arms, wanting to pretend this was just another one of their normal reunions, but it wasn’t, was it. This was a lot more serious than any of them wanted to admit.

“Jackson, you were supposed to be waiting outside.”

“I thought it’d be safer if we went out in twos, and I couldn’t wait to see the baby anymore.”

“Ok, you’ll have plenty of time to cling to each other on the jet. We need to move.”

“Shut up you big baby, let us have our moment, I’ll get to you eventually...”

“Hyung, what are you even doing here? I thought ‘nyoungie Hyung was piloting...”

“Wait, is uncle here too?! What is this, Christmas?” Hyunjin almost jumped in his excitement.

“He’s waiting for us on board,” Mark explained.

“Ya. You should be grateful I’m here instead of him. Otherwise, you’d be dead by now. Do you know how fuckin’ worried we were? Who in their right mind goes completely off the grid for five whole days in this mess? Even I wanna kill you right now, you little shit!” Hyunjin ducked his head when Jackson reached out to smack Yugyeom.

“What else was I supposed to do? We were literally being trailed everywhere, up until New York. I had no other choice-”

“Maybe give one of us a fuckin’ heads up before you completely disappear off the face of the planet? You idiot-“Mark cut Jackson off from his rant.

“OK! I can’t believe I’m saying this, but that’s enough scolding for now. ‘Nyoungie just texted me and I quote ‘If my nephew is not here in front of me by the next five minutes I am personally going to come to that godforsaken bathroom, collect the baby and leave the three of you there to fend for yourselves with knives in your useless feet.’” Hyunjin chuckled at the alarmed faces of his hyungs hearing Jinyoung’s threat.

“We’d better get going then!” Yugyeom gladly took the opportunity to separate them and push him towards the taps.

“K, Hyunjin hun, hurry up and take your jacket and hoodie off and put these on for me.” Jackson took his cap off and fixed his dishevelled hair for him as Mark rummaged through the duffle bag on the counter and handed him a white leather jacket with a matching hoodie and face mask.

He didn’t know if he should be grateful for the new change of clothes. He hated putting on clean clothes when he hadn’t showered in a week, it made him feel uncomfortable and just- icky.

He shivered as he took off his hoodie, immediately putting the white one on. In the corner of his eyes, he could see Mark changing to the clothes Hyunjin had just taken off. He couldn’t help but cringe. “Is all this really necessary?”

“Yes. Now hurry up before Jinyoungie actually shows up here and staples us to the wall.”

“I couldn’t park here so we gotta walk a couple streets over. Hope you’re not too tired for that.”

“Don’t they have a parking lot here?” 

“They do if you wanna have a dozen cameras tracking your every move…”

“Yeah, this place has way too many. You know how many I scouted just in this hallway?” Jackson added, waiting for someone to ask the question.

“How many?”

“None. But there are still a ton in the main hall and the parking lot so my point still stands.” Mark snorted, rolling his eyes along with Yugyeom.

“Hyung, didn’t you say we had one more flight left?”

“Yup! Just one more left. I know Yugi was a pain in the ass the last week. My poor baby. He probably didn’t even feed you properly. Don’t worry honey, Hyung will take good care of you, hmm! Jinyoungie is already warming up a meal for you on the jet.” Jackson cooed, fixing the white hoodie on him before messing up his hair making him cringe in disgust.

“Am I stupid or does that make no sense? Why would we go get a car if uncle is waiting for us on a jet?” Jackson’s fussing on his collar slowed down to a stop. Hyunjin looked up to see Jackson and Mark sharing a quick look.

There was something in that look that made something sour begin to curdle in Hyunjin’s stomach.

When they both turned their gazes to Yugyeom in dread, he knew there was something important they weren’t telling him. (Other than the obvious, which was the reason people have been following them around 4 continents in the last week.)

What the hell were they hiding that they’re being like this?

“So this is why he’s been this calm. You haven’t told him yet.”

“Yeah, you’re right Hyung. I should’ve told him in the middle of an airport or, even better, on the plane, so he would freak out right there in front of everyone and blow our cover.” Yugyeom retorted, giving them a deadpan look.

“Told me what?…” He asked hesitantly, his heart growing heavier by every second ticking by and they weren’t saying anything.

“I’m not coming with you. That was my last flight. You’ve still got one more to go.” Yugyeom responded without even turning to look at him, zipping up one side of the duffle bag on the counter.

“Hyung, what?” Yugyeom tensed, finally stopping to look at Hyunjin through the mirror.

“You’re gonna go back with the hyungs. They’re gonna be taking you to a safe house so you can lay low till we sort everything out.”

The guilty look his hyungs always got whenever they had to deliver bad news, the hesitation in their voices trying to make the blow as soft as possible. He recognized them both now, he wondered how he hadn’t until this moment. Yugyeom had been acting strange this whole time. His breath got caught in his throat.

He’d let his guard down too much through the years. 

“So why aren’t you coming with us?” The question came out a bit sharper than he had intended and he would have felt remorse if he couldn’t guess Yugyeom’s answer from the look he received.

Please no.

“We can’t afford to be in the same place right now, Jinnie. The first person they will be looking for when they can’t find you is me, so-“

“So you’re gonna try to distract them so they come after you instead? Is that what you’re going to do?” Yugyeom just looked back down to the duffle on the counter guiltily, zipping up a pocket. Hyunjin scoffed in disbelief, failing to keep it in his chest, and he didn't bother to hide it either.

He looked around for support from the other two in the room, but they were doing everything to avoid his eyes, moving stuff around in the duffle bags. Hyunjin could feel his blood pressure rising, his throat constricting with irrational anger and pent-up frustration from the past week. He shook his head tensely.

“Hyung, are you actually insane? How does that make any fucking sense? Why did we go through all that trouble just for you to go back out there and act as fucking bait?” He was aware of his voice growing louder with each sentence, but he couldn’t bring himself to care. The other two in the room seemed to have completely quieted down, just silently standing on the side, still avoiding him like the plague.

They had planned this behind his back. Like they always did.

“We went through all that trouble to ensure your safety. The only thing that matters right now is your safety, Hyunjin.”

“And what about yours? Huh? Where are you going to be? Lying dead in a fucking ditch?!” He snapped, eyes starting to get bloodshot with the multitude of emotions that were pushing up into his chest. Or was it the tears flooding his eyes.

“Hyunjin, I don’t want to hear any more arguments about this from you right no-“

“I don’t care Hyung! I don’t fucking care!” The knot in his throat was getting bigger, blocking his airway, making it harder for him to breathe.

“Hyunj-“

“No!” Hyunjin’s voice cracked as he shouted, freezing all movement in the room.

“You’ve been dragging me all around the fucking world for a whole week, acting all paranoid. Now all of a sudden, you’re gonna fucking leave me alone without actually telling me what the actual hell is going on.” His heart was beating so fast he had to take a second to breathe. “You’re out of your mind if you really think I’m gonna let something like this happen again. It’s gotta be a big deal if you’re this fucking scared.”

“You’re not gonna be alone. The rest of the Guard is gonna be with you. And I am not scared. Nothing is going to happen to me. Hyung is coming with me.”

“Yeah, because that makes things any fucking better. I want to know everything right now. I’m not going anywhere until I know exactly what’s going on.” Hyunjin spat, his eyes turning into slits glaring at his hyungs.

Yugyeom spun around to face him, the previous guilt in his eyes now suppressed by annoyance and urgency making Hyunjin almost flinch.

“Listen to me Hyunjin. Me telling you what’s going on right now is only going to make things harder for everyone involved. Now, you are going to follow my orders, get on that plane without any more fucking complaints and lay low until I say so.” Yugyeom warned, his voice firmer now, with an underlying note of rigour authority. It felt like a punch to his chest.

His jaw clenched as he stubbornly held Yugyeom’s scalding glare, tears burning his eyelids like acid. The lump in his throat was suffocating him.

This can’t be happening again. It can’t be happening again.

“You promised me.” The words echoed in the empty bathroom, or so it seemed for Hyunjin. The tension in the room was suffocating, as if everything had frozen in place and the other three were not immune to it either, flinching as he muttered the words in the empty bathroom.

Something flickered across Yugyeom’s eyes, gone too fast for Hyunjin to put a name to it. His eyes hardened again all too quickly. Mark stepped between him and Yugyeom, keeping a hand on him as if he wanted Yugyeom to back down.

“Jinnie, please, don’t make this harder than it has to be.”

“Then don’t go! You promised me you wouldn’t do this again!”

“Promises mean nothing when your life’s in danger.” “Yugyeom-“

“No! They just mean nothing to you! They never fucking do.” “Hyunjin-“ Mark tried to intervene again, but Yugyeom cut in before he could continue.

“You’re still getting on that jet.”

“I am not going anywhere without you.” He gritted out, his voice coming out shaky, unlike the strong tone he was hoping for.

“Well then, good thing the choice is not yours.” The warning came with narrow eyes and a twisted face; an expression Hyunjin could read perfectly as ‘End of discussion’. He felt like throwing up. The overwhelming number of tears gathering in his eyes was finally what made him break eye contact.

It’s happening all over again.

They’re leaving him again. They’re gonna get hurt because of him. They’re gonna die.

They’re gonna die.

He felt Jackson slowly wrap his arms around his waist, trying to gently pull him back to his chest.

The tears finally falling, Hyunjin shrugged out of Jackson’s timid hold to turn around and wipe away the stray tears running down his cheeks, not wanting them to see he was crying, even though it wasn’t hard to figure out with his irregular breathing and sniffles.

They’re gonna die.

The ringing in his ear was getting louder by the second. He was clenching his hands so tight his nails were digging into his palms. He felt a sob bubbling up his chest but swallowed it back down and took a deep breath to calm himself down but that wasn’t working.

They’re gonna die and it’s going to be your fault. 

“Baby…”

No, no no no no no no no. This isn’t happening again. It’s not happening again please it can’t be.

They promised.

Jackson was trying to pull him to his chest again, but his touch only made him want to scream. Shrugging out of his arms again, he shakily took the white leather jacket off the counter, quickly putting everything on before booking it for the door.

“Hyunjin!” The door slammed closed before they could reach him but opened behind him not a second later. He didn’t pay it any mind and just ran as fast as he could, taking the first exit that he could see.

As soon as he was outside, he took his mask off and hid behind a pillar, sliding down until he was curled up at the bottom behind a trashcan trembling.

His breathing had gotten so bad he had to take big gulps of air through his mouth and he knew it was only a matter of time before he threw up everything left in his stomach.

He wasn’t paying attention to his surroundings, so he jumped when he felt two warm hands cup the sides of his head. He flinched back from the touch, shaking his head no, trying to keep the sobs in. His vision was so blurry he couldn’t see who it was, but from the gentle tone and tender lilt of the voice that greeted him, he knew it was Jackson.

“Okay baby, I’m sorry, I won’t touch you. Just- I need you to breathe for me. Can you do that for hyung?” Jackson’s voice spoke through the fogging of his vision.

He shook his head yes with a sob, rubbing his eyes raw with the heel of his palms. He tried to breathe in deep for a few seconds, but his sobs weren’t stopping.

“That’s it. Deep breaths. Do you remember our little game? Hmm? Can you name five things you can see for me, baby?” They carried out the exercise his hyungs had memorised to heart for calming Hyunjin down after a panic attack, Jackson keeping his voice light and loving throughout, making sure he wasn’t touching him anywhere.

“There we go, and one thing you can feel,” Jackson finished, his hand hovering over Hyunjin’s heart, body shielding him from prying eyes.

“Pain.” Hyunjin whimpered.

“Where baby? Tell hyung where it hurts,” Jackson’s voice got panicked as he checked Hyunjin’s body for any injuries, but Hyunjin swatted his hands away, flinching away from his touch.

“You promised,” he whispered, brokenly. Jackson froze, his face crumbling in despair. Hyunjin couldn't bear to look at him.

“I know.”

“Hyung, what’s. going. on.” He pleaded, traitorous tears starting to burn his eyes again. 

“Hyung will explain everything on the jet, promise,” Both of them winced at the word and Jackson looked like he wanted to swallow his own tongue.

Hyunjin wanted to tell him their promises meant nothing to him anymore, but he held himself back.

Chapter Text

The house was quieter than usual, Hyunjin had thought the others would be back by now, but by the sound of it, the house was still empty. 

Or mostly empty anyway. 

He blinked at the sad, stale piece of bread on the untouched lunch tray beside his bed. The green curry still smelt good, but it looked like it had frozen in the cold temperature of his room, the rice not even looking edible anymore. 

He’d feel guilty for missing yet another one of Bambam’s homemade meals, but he knew he wouldn’t have eaten much even if he’d been awake for it. 

He checked his new phone for the time, and sure enough, he had slept through the whole day. Again. 

He didn’t know if it was the jet lag that was keeping him awake at night and sleeping through the day or the depression. 

Either way, he wasn’t complaining. It had given him a good excuse to escape the pitying looks and uncomfortable silence around his hyungs the last week. 

Not that he’d needed an excuse anyway. He had made it clear that he needed some space and they were doing a great job at giving it to him, keeping themselves busy with the ‘situation’ as they kept calling it and mostly leaving him to his own devices, other than the times Jackson or Jinyoung would get anxious about him missing meals and force him to eat in front of them. But that’s as far as they would go, trying not to push. 

He didn’t know if he appreciated that or not. He felt like he’d lash out at them if he had to be in the same room as them for even a second longer than necessary, however, at the same time, his anxiety had been going through the roof the past couple of days, not knowing exactly where most of them were or what was happening outside of the four corners of his room.

Usually, when it got this bad he’d seek them out for affection, physical touch being the thing that calmed his anxiety down the most, especially if it came from the hyungs, however since his panic attack at the airport a week ago, he had felt nothing but unease flaring in his stomach whenever one of them was even a bit too close to him.  

The flight back to Corea had gone excruciatingly slow. Jackson had tried to bring him back to the bathroom after he had calmed down, but he’d almost gone into another panic attack at the thought of having to say goodbye to them.  

The way back to the jet was kind of a blur. The only thing that he remembered was that Jackson had put on his mask and cap back on for him and made him hold on to his sleeve as he led them to the jet.

Jinyoung had engulfed him in his arms as soon as they’d stepped in, which had almost triggered yet another attack, but the need to know what was going on had been greater so he’d tried to push everything down until he had an explanation. Which hadn’t been the greatest idea in retrospect. He had known whatever was coming his way was going to take a toll on his mental state and a jet wasn’t really the best place to have a mental breakdown on, but the longer he was kept in the dark, the worst his anxiety got. 

They’d tried to make the blow as soft as possible. They really had. But finding out the person who had murdered his whole family had come out of hiding and had tried to kill him just a week ago was not the most pleasant thing in the world. 

They’d explained to him that they didn’t know anything for sure yet. There had been a break-in at the king’s estate seven months ago followed by another at Hwaseong fortress a couple of weeks later. No one had been hurt and nothing material had been stolen, so they’d assumed whoever it had been was just looking for intel instead. 

Kingdoms naturally come with a lot of enemies so the idea that a foreign spy had broken in to get information hadn’t been farfetched. They clearly hadn’t had any success anyway, so the case had been closed. 

That was until the king had demanded their presence back at the capital just a week later. They had no idea what the reasoning behind the sudden command was, so, at that time, they’d just told Hyunjin it was for official business and left Yugyeom in charge, expecting to stay there for just a few days. 

That had been six months ago.

The king had gathered his inner circle at his private estate and informed them of who exactly had been behind the break-ins. He had not given them any leads, only his word, which meant they had nothing to go off on. So for the last six months, they’d been working tirelessly, searching for anything that could lead them to the traitor, but they’d had no success. 

There had been no activity from the other side either, no sightings of any terrorist attacks, no reports of any security breaches, no trace of the traitor even existing whatsoever. 

Up until a week ago.

They had been blindsided. The attacks had been extremely well coordinated. Seven bombs going off at the same time, all throughout the country, all at the king’s private residences, followed by 30 to 50 shooters at each location, blindly shooting at anything in their way. To make the matters worse, the king had disappeared the same morning before the attacks, no one aware of his exact whereabouts. 

The royal guard and the department of national security had taken control of the situation fairly quickly, managing to contain all terrorist attacks in under 30 minutes, however, they had not been able to prevent the horrific number of casualties. They had nearly lost over 200 guards and staff members during the attacks, most notably among them, head court lady Noh. 

The kingdom was in distress. Nobody had any idea of who exactly had been behind the attacks, except the king’s inner circle. The media was asking too many questions that they couldn’t answer, it was chaos. 

Unbeknownst to the rest of the royal guard, there had been one more terrorist attack that day in addition to the seven in Corea, at the Hwang estate in Australia. They had been so concentrated on containing the attack and locating the king that they had not known of the last attack till it had been too late. 

“By the time we sent out people to check on you Yugyeom had already cut off all contact and gone underground.” Jackson had explained. 

“We tried to fly back, but the prime minister put the country under complete lockdown. All borders were closed until national security had made sure the threat had been contained completely.”

“We were sick to our stomach with worry, we couldn’t find any traces of you anywhere, three days later, the same day the borders were opened, Mark finally got the call from Yugyeom while we were on the jet to Sidney.”

“What about the king?” He had timidly asked.

“We released a statement to the press on behalf of the imperial palace that the king is in mourning and would therefore not be making any appearances until further notice. No one has seen him or the chief imperial bodyguard since that morning. There are no traces of them leaving the estate either.”

“It’s not uncommon for the king to suddenly disappear without a trace. It happens every couple of months, he never explains it, always shows up a couple of days later as if he’d never left in the first place, but this is different.”

“The timing of the attacks and the king’s disappearance were too close for them to just be a coincidence. The bombs went off only minutes after head court lady Noh had notified us about the king’s absence.”

“The only people who have been made aware of the king’s disappearance are the inner circle and the prime minister, who is thankfully a close friend. We’ve been trying everything in our power to find them and keep the press off our case until we’ve come up with a plan of action, but, as of now, your safety is the most important on the agenda.”

“Which is why Yugyeom and Mark had to be separated from us.”

The comment had led to a big argument between the three. 

It felt like he’d been screaming at them for hours, he remembered thinking they’d crash if the jet hadn’t had an autopilot. The argument had ended when Hyunjin’s hyperventilating had started preventing him from breathing properly. They’d tried to help, but he wouldn’t let them touch him, not even Jinyoung. He’d just bunched up on the seat furthest from the cockpit and shut off. 

After he had calmed down, he’d told them he wanted to sleep so they’d leave him alone for the rest of the flight. And they had, for the most part. Jackson had tried to make him eat the food they had prepared at some point, but he’d refused, knowing he’d throw up everything before it could even reach his stomach. Usually, just refusing to eat would never work with any of the hyungs, but it seemed Jackson couldn’t bring himself to force him into it at that moment, which he was thankful for. 

They’d been doing enough of that lately. 

He hadn’t gotten the warmest welcome back in Corea. No one was supposed to know of his return, so they’d wanted to keep a low profile and stay as far away from the capital as possible. Seoul had been their best bet. The safe house was located in a gated community near the outskirts of the city, nowhere near any official buildings or the royal estate. The community was already known for housing a lot of celebrities, so the extra security detail around the house wouldn’t raise any suspicion. 

He hadn’t really paid much attention to his surroundings on the ride to the safehouse, only noticing they’d reached their destination when they were stopped briefly at the front gates. 

He’d zoned out again during the last five minutes to the house, missing the way the front gates had opened for them before they’d even reached the doors. 

He was pulled out of the car and led to the house by Jackson who was pushed out of the way the second they were at the door. He couldn’t remember who’d thrown themselves at him first, just that he was passed around three pairs of familiar arms for multiple rounds before Jinyoung had pulled him out of Youngjae’s clutches and told them all he needed to rest, showing him to his room, where he had passed out from exhaustion. 

He thought Jinyoung and Jackson had probably recounted the events of the last 20 hours to the rest of the hyungs because he noticed how they went out of their way to not push him and give him all the space they thought he needed.

BamBam clearly hadn’t gotten the memo though, Hyunjin thought. He’d been trying to get Hyunjin out of his room every chance he’d gotten, cooking his favourite dishes, or playing their shared dance playlist loud outside his room to lure him out. 

His methods would have worked normally, had Hyunjin not been so lethargic and numb for the last few days. 

He felt guilty for making them feel so unwanted, but he couldn’t just act like it wasn’t tearing him apart, feeling like what happened seven years ago was happening all over again. 

History was repeating itself and none of them could see it. 

He startled at the sharp knock on his door. On instinct, he pulled the blanket higher up his body and closed his eyes shut, managing to even out his breathing before the sliding doors opened, even going as far as to leave his mouth a little open to seem more natural. 

Maybe they’d believe he was still sleeping if he played his cards right.

BamBam’s infamous scoff echoed around the room. 

Hyunjin slumped, seeing no point in trying to keep the act up for any longer.

“That’s what I thought,” Bam said smugly. Hyunjin sighed, sitting up sluggishly, his bed hair flying all around his face. “Who were you trying to foo-“ Hyunjin scowled at Bam’s dramatic gasp. 

“Have you been fooling the hyungs like this the whole week? Is that why none of them have forced you out of this room yet? Because they thought you were sleeping?”

Although petulant, Hyunjin decided to answer. “For your information, I was sleeping just a second before you barged into my room-“ 

“You didn’t even TOUCH your lunch that I spent an hour cooking!? How dare you let my green curry go to waste like that you ungrateful little shit!” Bambam flicked him on the forehead. 

“I was sleeping!” He shrieked, his hand coming up to rub at the now sore spot.

“Like you were sleeping just a second ago?” Hyunjin groaned, flopping back on the bed in defeat. 

“You won’t touch the food that I spent my blood, sweat, and tears making? That’s fine. But at least take a shower once in a while, dude. Personal hygiene is important, even for depressed emo kids like you.” He taunted. Hyunjin groaned. 

“Just go soak under water for five minutes, I promise the hyungs won’t jump you the second you leave your room. You smell like death warmed over, with your greasy ass hair,” Bam ran his hand through his hair, making him cringe and pull away. “-and your dry ass skin,” He facepalmed Hyunjin’s face, pushing his head into the pillow.

“Yah!” Hyunjin screeched, pushing him sideways on the bed. Bambam, the devil that he is just chuckled. 

“What? I’m just trying to help you Jinnie. You’re starting to resemble a corpse a bit too much lately. I haven’t even seen you get out of this bed to go pee! Are you constipated? Should I get you some-” Bam outright laughed when Hyunjin threw the pillow under his head at his face, pulling the blanket over his head and using his arm as the missing pillow he just sacrificed. 

He’d missed the teasing and playful air that followed Bambam around everywhere, but at that specific moment, he didn’t need anyone to tell him just how disgusting he was. 

Maybe he would leave him alone if Hyunjin didn’t pay attention to him….

Who was he kidding?

Bambam started poking him in the head, trying to get his finger in Hyunjin’s ear when he ignored him the first couple times. 

“Hyung~ just let me sleep!” Whining, he covered his ears with his hands under the blanket.

“That’s all you’ve been doing this whole week!”

Hyunjin pouted but stayed silent. 

Bambam sighed loudly and before Hyunjin could even prepare himself for what was coming, Bambam had gotten him tumbling out of his cocoon. 

Squawking in surprise, he tried to roll out of Bam’s reach but he was quicker. Bambam wrapped his claws around Hyunjin’s ankles, pulling him until he’d gotten Hyunjin precariously balancing on the edge of the bed. He had taken Hyunjin’s lack of balance as an opportunity to sit on top of him.

“Hyuuuung~“ He tried to wriggle free but Bambam was putting all his weight on Hyunjin’s stomach and using all his muscle to keep him in place.

To make everything worse, he was laughing his stupid victory laugh, acting as though he was not even a little bothered by Hyunjin. I’ll show him, Hyunjin thought bitterly. “Are you gonna listen to me now?”

“In your dreams!” Hyunjin growled, bucking his hips up in frustration, managing to make Bam lose his balance for a second, which then gave him just enough leverage to slip out and flip them over until he was sitting on Bambam’s stomach. 

“Ha HA!!!” He cuffed both of Bambam’s hands that were trying to tickle him off. 

However, his stroke of luck ended there because he lost his grip in shock when he heard the sudden sound of glass breaking somewhere down the hall. 

Bambam had stiffened under him. Hyunjin was about to get off of him when they both heard the familiar sound of Jackson cursing.

Hyunjin had barely let out a relieved sigh before he was being flipped over, Bambam giggling on top of him like a maniac. He really didn’t have it in him to keep up appearances anymore. He let out a giggle when Bambam yelled out ‘language hyung!’ to Jackson who still hadn’t stopped cursing. 

After their giggles died down a little, Hyunjin slumped into the mattress, and in true Bambam fashion, Bam draped himself all over him, sighing happily once he was completely settled, like an extremely annoying koala finding the perfect spot to sleep off.  

Hyunjin was practically crushed under him but he didn’t want to do anything to throw him off, surprisingly feeling extreme relief now that he had one of his beloved hyungs close in his arms. 

He barely considered Bambam as one of the hyungs though, so maybe that was why he was more comfortable around him. 

Even though Bam and Yugyeom were the same age, Bambam had always taken the chaotic best friend role when it came to Hyunjin, leaving all the responsibility and seriousness that came with being a bodyguard to his counterpart, Yugyeom, which was exactly why the title of Hyunjin’s main guard had gone to Yugyeom at the end of their training.

Hyunjin wondered how his life would’ve panned out if they hadn’t been apart of it. If Hyunjin hadn’t been born into the royal family. If he hadn’t become the heir to the throne. 

What would’ve happened if Yugyeom and Bambam had been free to pursue their passions as careers and not just side hobbies, if Jaebum hadn’t burned almost half of his body saving him from a fire, if Jinyoung hadn’t had to take custody of a ten year old child at the age of twenty, if his family hadn’t been murdered by a power-hungry lunatic. 

Maybe in another universe…

Bambam nuzzling his ice-cold nose into his neck, violently pulled him from his thoughts. 

A shiver ran through his body as he stretched his neck away from Bambam’s icicle of a nose, whining in defeat as Bambam just nuzzled his nose deeper into his neck in response, letting out his sadistic giggles. 

“Ahh hyung you’re disgusting!” Bambam scoffed. 

“Look who’s talking!” Hyunjin huffed in irritation. 

“How about we make a deal, Hyunjinnie. You go take a bath and change into some of the clothes I so graciously got you a couple days ago and I’ll make you your favourite for dinner. Hmm? How does that sound?”

“How about you stop crushing me with your whole body and let me actually breathe in peace for a second? Hmm hyung, how does that sound?” He almost regretted sassing back at him when he saw the evil smirk taking over Bambam’s face. 

“How ‘bout you shower and come downstairs to eat with me and the rest of the hyungs, and I promise I won’t tell the hyungs who was actually behind the Monte Carlo fiasco?” Hyunjin’s eyes almost popped out in panic.

He gasped in betrayal. “You wouldn’t dare!” 

“Wanna bet?”

He cackled in victory when Hyunjin threw him off the bed, grumbling under his breath. Oh how Hyunjin wanted to wipe that smug smirk off his face. 

“Aww come on baby. Don’t be so grumpy. I know you’ve been giving up your personal hygiene this whole week just to avoid the hyungs. You were looking for an excuse, so take the opportunity that I’m presenting you with.” He grinned. Hyunjin rolled his eyes in faux exasperation.

Well, he wasn’t exactly wrong.

“Whatever.” He grumbled, getting up to open his closet doors for the first time. 

“How about I sweeten the deal a little, will you be happier baby?”

“Hmmm depends on the sweetener…”

“How does a little race around the neighbourhood sound?” Hyunjin scoffed at the almost devilish gleam in Bambam’s eyes. 

“How exactly? Neither of us have our cars… here…” He trailed off when he noticed Bambam’s grin was getting wider by the second. 

That’s when it hit him.  

“You’ve got to be kidding me! They were here all along?!” 

“I know! And to think we thought they’d sold them! I just found out too! Hyung was so distraught when everything went down that he forgot I was there when he took out his beloved challenger, didn’t even close the garage gates when he left. Rookie mistake.” Bambam snickered. Hyunjin almost had to hold onto him, he couldn’t believe it. 

“And they’re all here?”

“Every single one of them. They’ve even added a few new ones, I checked over everything!” Hyunjin’s head was already racing with excitement. 

“But how are we gonna get in there exactly without anyone finding out? Hyung would have our heads if he caught us in the act…”

“Have you forgotten who you’re talking to?”

“No, I think you’ve forgotten exactly how Jaebum hyung gets when he’s on edge…”

“Oh please, as if he’d find time to punish us in this mess. And he’d never find out anyway, he’s got nothing on my hacking skills. The codes cracked under my program in less than five minutes. And even if, I would’ve been able to guess them on my own, hyung is so predictable…” Bambam gloated. 

“Don’t tell me he set our initials as the password again.” Hyunjin deadpanned. The first time they had discovered Jaebum’s password, they’d been in disbelief at how a high-ranking member of the royal guard could be so stupid as to put his team’s initials as his password. 

“Nope. This time he went for our birthdays in order from oldest to youngest.” He chuckled evilly. “At least he tried to make it harder this time by writing the dates American style, I’ll give him that.” 

Hyunjin scoffed, shaking his head in incredulity. “You know, at this point, he deserves to get robbed.”  

“Hey! We’re not robbing anyone, we’re just taking back what is rightfully ours.” Bambam sounded so wicked Hyunjin almost felt bad for Jaebum for a second. 

“And I’m assuming you already have a plan how to sneak us out without anyone noticing?” Hyunjin grimaced. 

“You don’t need to worry about that part either. Jaebum and Youngjae aren’t gonna be back for probably another few days and Jackson and Jinyoung will most probably not be home at that time either. The hidden elevator is in the backyard so there won’t be any guards, and the garage is so big that the gate opens all the way behind the property, so there won’t be any guards standing around there either. It’s gonna be smooth sailing.”

Hyunjin flopped back on the bed. “Not much of a safehouse is it?” 

“Well, it was designed to keep people out, not keep them in.” Bambam threw him a big towel, ruffling his hair when Hyunjin caught it in his arms. He backed off when Hyunjin cringed away.

Resting his hands on his hips, Bam let out a satisfied sigh as he looked over Hyunjin. “So will you come eat dinner with us tonight?”

He sighed. “Only if you’re forcing me to.”

“Great. So I’ll see you downstairs in 30. Dry your hair before you come down, don’t you dare drip on the hardwood floor!”

Hyunjin rolled his eyes in exasperation and pushed Bambam out of the room.

Sluggishly, Hyunjin walked up to the small closet to gather a new set of clothes, thanking Bambam internally for almost replicating his exact closet back at home, which was just mostly dark, loose-fitting clothes with the occasional statement piece. 

He knew him well. 

He was almost scared to leave the room, as if he would be exposed the moment he stepped out, but he pushed the unnecessary anxiety aside to get over with everything faster. 

Sliding the doors open, he was almost surprised at the fresh air in the hallway, just then realising how stuffy the air in his room had become.

He didn’t even spare the mirror a glance when he got to the bathroom, setting his clothes on the counter to lock the door behind him quickly. 

His shower was almost too hot, skin pink as he scrubbed himself clean with extra vigour, washing his hair twice, to completely get rid of the tangles and disgusting grime that had been collecting in his hair, resulted from lying on the same exact spot for a whole week. 

Normally, he'd have a longer shower (maybe even a bath if he was too tired to stand after a long practice), but he had forgotten his phone in his hurry and being left alone with his own thoughts was not the greatest idea. 

Not in his current state of mind.

So he got out as soon as he deemed himself clean enough, feeling himself going lightheaded under the hot stream of the water.

Fuck. Maybe I should’ve eaten something beforehand, he thought, pushing his overgrown bangs out of his eyes and splashing his face with cold water to stop his head from spinning, his hands gripping onto the edge of the counter just in case his head got too heavy. 

He realised Bambam was right when he finally caught his own reflection in the mirror. He really did look like a corpse. Despite his recently extended sleeping schedule, the bags under his eyes had almost developed into bruises, and his skin had become dry and dull, despite the blush on his cheeks from the hot shower. 

He looked away and grabbed a towel. 

The clatter of dishes and silverware from downstairs meant Bambam was done with food and was now probably setting the table. 

He tried to swallow his anxiety down, quickly putting on the dark grey sweatpants and the matching t-shirt to go downstairs before he could change his mind and confine himself in his room again. 

He had to stop avoiding the hyungs at some point. He couldn’t just keep up with what he’d been doing forever. He missed their familiar comfort, even with the pit in his stomach whenever he thought of them. 

He opened the door, breathing in the smell of the jjajangmyeon that had taken over the whole house. Hyunjin felt a familiar warmth bloom in his chest. 

He grabbed a smaller towel on his way out of the bathroom, lazily rubbing it in his hair as he walked downstairs and to the kitchen to take shelter with Bam before he had to face the rest of them. 

That had been a mistake on his part. 

He hadn’t been expecting the shriek that Bambam let out the moment he stepped in the dining room. He startled so badly, his soul almost left his body. 

“You’re dripping all over the floor, Hyunjin! I told you to dry your hair before coming down!” Before he could even recover from the shock, Bambam had dragged him onto a carpet in the living room by the ends of the towel around his neck.

“Ah! Hyung!” 

“Do you know what happens if these floors get ruined?” He pulled on both ends of the towel, making Hyunjin bend his neck, whining as Bambam aggressively rubbed his head with the towel. “Everyone in the house will hear our every step! That means no more sneaking out!” Hyunjin finally dodged him. 

“Now go dry your hair properly you brat!” Hyunjin groaned in irritation, rolling his eyes at Bambam’s antics. 

Begrudgingly, he held the towel around his head till he was out of Bambam’s sight, making a detour around the corridor behind the living room to get to the stairs. 

He stopped in his tracks though when he heard his own name behind one of the doors in the dark hallway, followed by a tired sigh. 

He took a step back closer to the door to hear better. 

“You know I can’t do that Joon-ah…”

Jackson sounded so worn out and defeated that Hyunjin was starting to feel guilty for the way he’d been treating him. Hyunjin had lived with Jackson long enough to know just how much he hated conflict, especially when it involved him and he couldn’t find a way to fix it quickly. 

He recharged when he was around his loved ones. But with Mark and Yugyeom so far away and Jaebum and Youngjae in Busan, he’d only had Jinyoung, Bam and him close and Hyunjin had been actively avoiding him and ignoring his affection for days.

Safe to say he felt like absolute shit.  

“The only thing that’s gonna achieve, is attract unwanted attention and put an even bigger target on his back than the one that’s already there…” He leaned forward, just a few centimeters from touching the door. 

Normally, Hyunjin didn’t like eavesdropping on people’s conversation, it was an invasion of their privacy, however, he’d had enough of the secrets and whatever they were talking about definitely involved him.  

He could only hear Jackson’s side of the conversation so he figured he was on the phone.

“His duty to the throne will not matter if he’s dead.” Jackson was furious. Hyunjin didn’t need to be in the room to tell. 

“I’m sorry Namjoon-ah,” 

Namjoon… As in Kim Namjoon, the prime minister?

“I respect you as a leader, and we’ve been friends long enough for me to trust you in any other situation, but this, I will not allow Hyunjin to be carelessly thrust into the limelight just to ward off a bunch of power-hungry politicians. He’s not just a pawn that you can use in your political games.” 

He had been so hyper-focused on making out the words, that he hadn’t realised he was tipping over until it was a bit too late. He gripped onto the edge of the chest drawer he had been leaning on to not face plant into the door but immediately regretted it when he realised the other side was lifting off the ground as he put his weight on it, wincing when it made a loud thud as it fell back down on the ground. 

Hyunjin was mortified. For a second, he just prayed Jackson hadn’t heard him and hoped if he slowly took some silent steps back and disappeared up the stairs, no one would find out he had been there.

His hopes and prayers were ruined when the door opened right in his face revealing an irritated Jinyoung. 

Hyunjin froze in his step. 

Jackson was standing right behind him in the doorway, phone in hand, pinning him in place with his gaze. “Hyunjin will not be making any appearances on behalf of the king and that’s final. We’ll talk later.” He hung up the phone with that, not taking his eyes off of him.

Hyunjin was still frozen, not knowing what to do or how to behave after having next to no interaction with them for the last week, just to be caught eavesdropping on them. 

Jackson’s disheveled appearance and Jinyoung’s sunken eyes made his heart squeeze. They both looked so tired, even worse than him.

Jinyoung coughed, snapping Hyunjin out of his stupor. 

Hyunjin tried to push down the guilt that was suffocating him in favour of looking nonchalant to get himself out of the situation. 

“You know Hyunjin-ah it’s not very nice to eavesdrop on people’s conversations. Curiosity killed the cat.” Jackson said, finally taking his eyes off him to put the phone down on a nearby table. 

Crossing his arms across his chest, Hyunjin immediately felt his defences going up. 

“It’s not nice to talk behind a person’s back and make decisions for them without their knowledge either. What’s your point.” He instantly regretted opening his mouth when he saw Jackson’s reaction to his words. 

Jackson tensed even more if that was possible, shakily closing his eyes in defeat, looking like he’d just swallowed something extremely bitter. Hyunjin wanted to punch himself. He hadn’t intended to come off so bitter and accusing. What was he doing?

“Watch your tone, Hyunjin” Jinyoung warned, but he couldn’t stop himself. It was as if his frustration from the last week had finally boiled over. There was no stopping him. His mouth was running on its own. 

“I was only pointing out the fact that you guys went back on yet another one of your promises that you made to me not even a week ago. I’m sorry I offended you.” You just keep making everything worse, don’t you…

“Jinnie, please-“

“Were you even gonna tell me that I was needed at the court? Or was this just another one of those things you hoped I’d never find out about?”  

“As your legal guardians, we have every right to make decisions on your behalf when it concerns your safety. And we promised we’d give you all the information about what’s happening and present you with every option that you have. This wasn’t something you had to know about. It was not even an option.” Jinyoung sounded so dismissive that it ticked off something in Hyunjin.

“And who exactly gave you the right to pick and choose what is an option and what’s not. What’s the point of me just staying here doing nothing if I’m needed elsewhere.” 

“You’re not needed anywhere. The whole point of us bringing you here was to hide you, so your appearance at court will not make any sense or do us any good. There is nothing you can do.” 

“Right! Sorry, for a second I forgot I’m just supposed to shut the fuck up, sit tight and watch as my loved ones get killed one by one trying to ‘keep me safe’.” He retorted bitterly, staring them down 

“Watch your tone Hyunjin,” Jinyoung warned again. 

Jackson heaved a tired sigh. “Baby please, don’t start with this again…” Hyunjin internally winced at the desperate plea in his tone, but he had to do this. 

He had to make them understand. 

“Start with what again hyung.” He muttered shakily. “Am I not allowed to be worried? Am I just supposed to forget about the fact that Yugyeom and Mark are God knows where putting themselves in fatal danger for nothing?”

“Nothing?” His face and voice were marred with exhaustion, but there was a fire igniting behind his eyes that Hyunjin could identify as absolute rage. 

“You think we’re doing this for nothing?”

“All that we’ve been doing, all that we’ve ever done, has been to protect you. You think that’s for nothing?”

“Hyung, you’re trading your life for mine as if my life is any more important than yours.”

“That’s because it is!” Jackson emphasised.

“Hyung, please~” He pleaded, his forehead creasing in desperation.  

“No kid, you need to understand, once and for all, that we would do anything; anything; to keep you out of danger, no matter the cost.”

“What if I don’t want your protection!” 

The two flinched at his words, stiffening in their place. The room had fallen silent. So silent, Hyunjin felt like even the crickets in the backyard had stopped chirping. If he hadn’t been so hysterical he would have probably felt bad, but the need to get everything out won over. 

“Do you know how many ti-“ he chocked up. “How many times, I’ve wished I’d just died in that car crash?” His lips trembled as he muttered the words out, keeping his gaze on a button on Jackson’s shirt, not having the guts to look them in the eyes as the words left his mouth.

“You don’t mean that.” Jackson had gone rigid, waiting for confirmation. 

He finally gathered the courage to look up, catching Jackson’s disbelieving eyes. “No hyung, but I do.” 

Jackson looked like he’d been gutted, his face scrunching up in so much pain, as if he was holding himself back from saying something.

“That’s enough Hyunjin.”

Hyunjin squeezed his eyes shut. “I’ve always wondered what would have happened if I hadn’t insisted on sitting in the middle that day; if I hadn’t taken off my seatbelt, if it had been me… It should’ve been me. None of this would’ve happened if I’d just-“ 

“Stop right there before you say something you’ll regret.” Jinyoung threatened.  

“I’m just trying to show you that you’re doing all this for nothing!” His voice bursted out so loud, his throat was hoarse at the end of the sentence. His eyes swam with frustrated tears. 

“You’re sacrificing yourself for nothing! My life, is worth nothing! So why do you keep doing this?!” He was shouting so loud that his voice broke on his last words. He wheezed out his next words.  

“Why do you insist on keeping me alive when I don’t even want to keep livi-” 

Searing hot pain. 

An explosion of pitch black and white spots was all Hyunjin could see as a sharp pain burst forth from his cheek. Pins and needles shot up his face and all he could hear was the sound of his own blood thumping and rushing, drowning out all his thoughts. Suddenly, everything cleared and came bursting forth as he found himself clutching his left cheek in shock, his tears almost completely blinding him.

The impact had been so hard his head had turned to the side. He steeled himself before the sob that had been trapped in his throat could escape, clenching his jaw tight as he felt Jackson brush against his shoulder, rushing out of the door. 

He was frozen in his spot. 

Never once had any of the hyungs gotten physical with him during any of their fights, no matter what he’d done or how furious they had been; Jackson least likely of them all to use violence in any other setting than combat. He must’ve really hit a nerve to provoke that kind of a reaction out of his most level-headed hyung.

“Go after him.” He would’ve thought Jinyoung was talking to him, if he hadn’t heard footsteps behind him, backing up down the corridor. He hadn’t even noticed Bambam behind him in the narrow hallway.

Before Hyunjin could turn away and escape up to his room, Jinyoung had gotten a firm hold of him. “Not you Hyunjin-ah.”

He winced but didn’t resist the grip on his wrist pulling him deeper into the small room. 

Jinyoung let go of his hold when they reached the small sitting area in the dark study, sinking down onto the edge of the coffee table, burying his face into his hands. Hyunjin noiselessly watched on the side, not taking the offered seat on the couch. 

When Jinyoung finally looked up, he had carefully wiped his face of any emotion, but Hyunjin could still recognise the pain behind the rigidly built wall of his. 

“Are you okay?” His left cheek stung in response. 

“‘m fine hyung.” He found a small crumb on the floor to stare at so he could avoid looking him in the eyes. 

“I should’ve never let that get so far. I’m sorry. I can’t apologise on Jackson’s behalf, but I’m sure he’s tearing himself apart as we speak.”

“’s fine. Not your fault.”

Silence took up the room, tension filling the air more with every second neither of them said anything. Hyunjin had been about to excuse himself when Jinyoung finally broke the silence, huffing out a chuckle. 

“You’re such a hypocrite, you know that?..” Hyunjin’s brows knitted. 

“You talk about us putting our lives in danger to keep you safe, as if you wouldn’t do the same for us in the blink of an eye if you had the chance…” Hyunjin turned his head bitterly, not having anything to say to that. 

Another twenty-something seconds with no one saying a word. Jinyoung broke the silence again, his voice level and calm. 

“Everything is going to turn out fine in the end. You need to trust me. We’ve got everything under control. We’ve been well prepared to handle this kind of situation.”  

“Well prepared, like you were well prepared seven years ago?” The level of tension in the room went from 60 to 100 in a matter of seconds. The silence told Hyunjin everything he needed to know.

He knew this was a sensitive subject for both of them and that he should probably not bring it up in an argument when they’re both so on edge, but Hyunjin was too tired to spare his feelings. 

“All I really wanna know is where you’re getting all this confidence…”

“You’re blowing things way out of proportion.” Hyunjin heaved a sigh. 

“Really? Am I, hyung? Is this not the exact same thing that happened seven years ago? Weren’t you there? Have you already forgotten what happened last time?” 

“Don’t be disrespectful Hyunjin. You weren’t the only one who lost someone important.”

“Exactly. So you should understand why I’m so against this. History is repeating itself and you’re just letting it happen like you don’t already know what the outcome is going to be.” The defeat was clear in his listless tone, the previous argument almost taking out all his energy. 

“So what do you suggest we do then. Sit around and wait for that maniac to finally show up and get what he wants?” His jaw ticked.

“No! I just want you to stop putting yourself in the first line of fire every time my life is in question.” His heartbeat was picking up and he felt the first signs of a migraine coming. 

“We are your royal guard, Hyunjin. That is our job.”

“You’re also my fucking family!” He burst out, panting as he looked at Jinyoung betrayed. Jinyoung fell silent, squeezing his eyes shut. The guilt was visible on his face, doing nothing to ease Hyunjin’s nerves. 

He felt his heart squeeze. 

“You’re all I have left and you’re gonna leave me behind like every other fucking person in my life has.” 

“That’s-“ 

“Are we done here?” Hyunjin sniffed, wiping the stray tears off his face with his sleeve. His voice had become hoarse from all the shouting and the crying. He just wanted to get out of that suffocating room.

Jinyoung sighed in disappointment and Hyunjin took his silence as a green light and took off out of the room. Bambam tried to stop him on his way up the stairs but he just shrugged him off, determined to get to his room. 

It was two hours later in the silence of his unlit room when he finally realised Jinyoung had been absolutely right. 

He would offer himself up on a silver platter without a second thought if it meant they would be out of danger. 

And he knew just the way to do it…

Chapter Text

Sneaking out of the house hadn’t been as difficult as he’d imagined it would be. 

Bambam had still been out looking for Jackson and Jinyoung hadn’t come out of the study since their argument, Hyunjin could hear him on the phone when he was passing the room going to the backyard. 

Somehow everything had conveniently worked in his favour for once. 

Once he had found the elevator in the backyard the rest had been easy. He had jabbed in the code Bambam had let slip out earlier, taken the keys to the most unsuspecting-looking car from the key rack and taken off. There were guards surrounding the whole block, but no one cared to stop him, most likely assuming he was a member of the guard since he was coming out of their private garage. 

He hadn’t allowed himself to look back, determined to get to Busan before the hyungs found out he was gone, hoping with everything that he had, that this would work. 

Now, nearly five hours later, he was finally at the main palace.

It was early morning in Busan so the sun hadn’t risen yet, the streets covered in a spring fog that made everything look a bit eerie, somehow reflecting the atmosphere around the palace perfectly. The street was almost entirely crowded by news vans and reporters, some civilians even camping in front of the gates with their big signs demanding answers. 

He had parked the car a little further down the street, deciding to take a minute to collect his bearings before he got out and had a thousand cameras flashing in his face all at once. 

Leaning over the passenger seat, he opened the dashboard hoping for a bottle of water or anything sweet he could find to settle his upset stomach but froze when Jinyoung’s scarf fell out instead.

Picking it off the ground, he slumped back in his seat, running his thumb over the stitching of the imperial seal at the bottom, the golden petals of the plum flower a nice contrast against the black cashmere. 

He didn’t even know why he had decided to take it with him last minute. He had paused for a good minute seeing the familiar black scarf on the back of the couch, grabbed it off and shoved it in the dashboard as soon as he’d gotten in the car, not wanting a reminder of the hyungs while he was actively defying their direct orders. 

He wouldn’t have had to do that if they’d just listened to him.

They were probably not expecting him to go this far. This was probably the last thing they imagined he’d do, actually. Sure, him and the other maknae’s snuck out of the house and got themselves in trouble regularly, Hyunjin had grown up under Bambam’s influence after all. He was naturally a little devil when it came to household rules and lessons attendance and whatnot, however, he’d never disobeyed them on anything remotely this serious. 

He’d disagreed with them, he’d argued, he’d fought, but he’d never done anything to lose their trust in him. 

That would definitely change after this.  

They would blame themselves for this too, wouldn’t they... 

Jackson’s anxiety would get triggered the moment he found out Hyunjin was gone, the older would probably think he left because he lashed out at him when Hyunjin was the one that had kept provoking him…Bam would beat himself up for 'putting the idea in his head’ and telling him all he’d needed to know to sneak out successfully, when in reality, Hyunjin had taken advantage of his innocent trust in him, and Jinyoung… his uncle would go crazy when he realized Hyunjin had left while he had been in the house. The guilt he’d been suppressing for the last five hours was finally starting to catch up to him.  

He clenched the soft fabric in his hands, his eyes closing shut as he breathed in and out a couple of times to calm down. 

He had to do this. There was no other way. 

The hyungs were never going to listen to him on their own. If they weren’t going to keep their promise, he was just going to have to keep it for them. He was not losing any more of the people he loved at the hands of that psychopath. 

Not if he could help it. 

The only way he could take the target off Yugyeom and Mark was to direct all the attention back to himself, so the people following them would realize they were chasing a bait, and the easiest way to do that was to dive headfirst into the sea of reporters gathered in front of the gates like piranhas waiting for a drop of blood to start pouncing. 

He knew the reaction would be instant. Even though he wasn’t a constant talked about figure in the kingdom and didn’t appear much in the media aside from seasonal greetings, he knew the news of his arrival to the royal palace after three years would reach the entire country in a matter of minutes. 

Much like the view the nation had of his highness in his younger years after the death of the former king, the people had a sort of motherly protectiveness towards Hyunjin, having witnessed the tragedy that was his family’s assassination, watching as he was reluctantly named next in line to the throne after the person formerly holding the title, his grandfather, Prince Buyeong’s sudden death. 

Any appearance or news of him would be greatly welcomed by the people, especially in such a crucial time where the country had been swimming in uncertainty for weeks, in desperate need of anything that could reassure them that everything was alright. Hopefully, the news of him coming back to Corea would do that. 

This was going to work… It just had to…

Taking a deep breath, he turned the engine off, gently smoothing out the scarf before securely tying it around his neck. He was just about to open the door when he heard a big commotion from the gates followed by a lot of yelling. 

He leaned forward to see what was going on that had the press swarming the gate so rapidly all of a sudden, but was startled when his car door opened before he could see anything. Shrieking in shock, he fumbled to push himself as far away from the door as he could.  

“Hi Hyunjinnie! Wasn’t expecting to see you here!” Hyunjin paled, unconsciously holding his breath as he stared at Youngjae right in front of him, eyes almost popping out of their sockets. 

Youngjae…

…right in front of him!

“Oh don’t act so shocked now honey. Get in the back.” He didn’t have time to even process the words before Youngjae was stepping in, making him scramble to move over to the passenger seat before he was crushed under him. 

“Hyung-“ 

“In the back, Hyunjin.” The command had been so strict that Hyunjin hadn’t had a second thought before he obeyed. 

So yeah, Hyunjin was royally screwed.

Youngjae rarely ever got angry at anyone in any situation, you could annoy him for hours and he would still be smiling at the end, so seeing his tensed shoulders and scalding gaze directed at him was jarring to say the least, not to mention the icy tone he’d used. 

How the hell had they found out where he was?! 

Youngjae hadn’t even given him time to climb over the console completely before he was backing the car out of the street, wobbling on his hands and knees before he unceremoniously fell down on the seat behind the driver seat. 

Oh God, it’s over, isn't it…

“Hyung wait-“ He was cut off by the sharp turn of the car, grabbing Youngjae’s headrest to hold on. “Hyung, please just- wait, just can you pull over and listen to me for a second-“ Another sharp turn. 

Leaning his head against the headrest, Hyunjin tried his hardest to stay calm to somehow reason with the older, doing everything to keep the overwhelming feeling of shame and frustration at bay.

No. It can’t end like this… I can’t let it end like this... 

“Hyung.” He pleaded, the desperation clear in his tone. It didn’t seem to have any effect on the older though, if anything he felt the car accelerating even more. 

He could feel that same sense of helplessness and panic that he had been suppressing since parting from Yugyeom and Mark come to a boil in his gut. “Hyung please.“

The hyungs were never going to let him breathe outside of their five-meter vicinity after this. He was never getting this chance again.

“Hy-“ 

“Hyunjin I swear to God if you don’t shut up right now.” The biting tone coming from Youngjae, who is normally extremely soft-spoken, would’ve made him go into silent shock for hours if this had been any other situation, but he couldn't find it in himself to stay quiet when his mind was running a mile a minute, blaring alarms as they got further and further away from the royal estate.

He was losing his chance. 

Moving a bit closer to the centre, Hyunjin hoped if he managed to get the older to look at him even for a tiny second, he could get him to calm down a bit using the soft spot all the hyungs seemed to have for him when they saw him in distress. “Where are you taking me.”

“Back where you were supposed to be staying put!” He'd never actually heard Youngjae come close to yelling before, but he looked ready to start.

“If you would just let me explain w-“

“Explain what exactly? That you’re an absolute idiot that shouldn’t be allowed into society because you’re so stupid you can’t even comprehend the simple concept of ‘people see you, you die’?” If Hyunjin hadn’t been aware of the implications of what he’d been about to do, he would’ve felt offended by the sharp words of the older, even a bit hurt, but he understood that anger was a reasonable reaction to what he’d done. It was probably masking his worry more than anything. 

He just didn’t know how to handle an angry Youngjae when he’d never encountered one. 

“I was just-“  

“You were just trying to get yourself killed. I get it, don’t worry, you’ll get your wish soon enough. Jaebum hyung will finish the job himself as soon as he gets his hands on you.” Youngjae spat, his voice only a few degrees warmer than freezing point and it made Hyunjin wince. 

The silence that followed felt like a layer of thin ice that he shouldn’t step on, he should probably stop, give the older some time to cool down, but he couldn’t just give up now that he’d gotten this far, so he swallowed and geared up to try to make his case again, not letting himself think he’d failed just yet.  

“Hyung,” He started, catching Youngjae’s dark glare in the rearview mirror the moment the word left his mouth, “look, I’m sorry. I know that you’re angry with me and I know-“ 

“You don’t know Hyunjin. That’s the whole fucking problem. You don’t have a fucking clue!” His eyes almost looked like they were shooting lasers with how intensely he was glaring at him. “If you did we wouldn’t be here right now.” 

“But h-“ 

“No kid. You’re done. You can do the rest of your grovelling when we get back home to the hyungs. I’m not in the mood to listen to you beg for five hours straight.” The older’s dismissive tone made his own anger start to simmer.

“I’m not a kid anymore!” He choked out pathetically, “And I wasn't going to beg! You know damn well why I did this. It was the most logical solution. It still is!” God, why won't they just listen?

“Oh you’ve got some nerve-“ 

“How long did you think your little trick was gonna last anyway? Lee Lim isn’t stupid, hyung,” He was confused when the older just shushed him in response but he continued his rant nonetheless.  

“He’s never going to stop until he fucking finds me! Yugyeom and Mark hyung will only slow him down for a few weeks at most, so why fucking risk their lives when what's coming is inevita-”

“Hyunjin, will you shut up for a second!” The elder interrupted him with a hiss, glaring daggers at him through the rear-view mirror. Hyunjin was just about to open his mouth to shout something back before he saw Youngjae pushing his in-ear back in.

“Sorry hyung, can you repeat that again? Couldn’t hear you over Jinnie’s nonsense.” Hyunjin scoffed bitterly, some frustrated tears falling as he rolled his eyes. 

“Yes, I got him, no, no one saw us, yes we’re on our way back and yes, he already regrets his actions deeply.” The older was glaring at him through the mirror, daring him to contradict him. Hyunjin bit his own tongue before he could say anything, leaning his forehead on the headrest again and sighing through his teeth in frustration. 

“We’re not on the highway yet, why?” Youngjae slowed the car down, whoever was on the other line seeming to take his focus off the road. “Hyung what’s going on,” Youngjae asked, something tightly-coiled and apprehensive in his words. “…why do you sound so out of breath…” 

After a few seconds of absolute silence, Hyunjin picked his head back up in curiosity, witnessing the moment Youngjae’s eyes lit up with dreadful realization. 

The car abruptly stopped in the middle of the street, making Hyunjin collide hard into the driver's seat from the back, groaning in pain. If Youngjae had been taking the main road they’d be in a pretty bad accident right about now. Probably so bad that this whole section of the street would have to be closed off. If only the street had been a bit busier and there were more cars in the street…

…someone would’ve no doubt collided with their car…

               …people would’ve started taking pictures and videos before they even recognized him, spreading the news of his arrival wide without him even having to go through the press…  

The sound of Youngjae swearing brought him back out of his trance, shaking the stupid thoughts out of his head. Searching the older’s expression, he tried to see what had prompted the older to stop the car so suddenly. 

“Shit…” Youngjae muttered, rubbing his forehead nervously. “..fuck. okay,” He took in a shaky breath, “okay tell me where you are right now.” Hyunjin couldn’t make out what was being said on the other end, but he could definitely tell it wasn’t anything good when he literally saw the hairs on Youngjae’s neck stand on end. “Like hell you’re gonna go in alone!”

Hyunjin’s mind went blank. He blinked. Then blinked again when the words weren’t quite registering. 

“Hyung, no- listen to me! I’m gonna be there in a minute. Do not go in alone do you hear me? Wait for backup!” 

Hyunjin’s heart was in his throat. 

“Dammit! I’m dealing with fucking idiots!” The volume of the older’s voice made him flinch, startling him out of his daze when he started hastily reversing the car back out of the alley, his phone in the hand he was resting on the back of the passenger seat taking up the other half of his attention as he tried to rapidly type a text at the same time.  

That was Jaebum. 

The only other member of the royal guard currently in Busan was Jaebum. So that couldn’t be anyone other than Jaebum. 

He was in trouble, wasn’t he…

Hyunjin unconsciously held his breath as he waited for the older to say something, explain what was going on that had him so distraught, what was so urgent that had him blindly backing the car out of an alley like a maniac, anything to stop Hyunjin from panicking even more than he already was, but the older stayed silent. 

Hyunjin breathed in, “Hyung, what’s going on…” he asked almost timidly, dreading the answer, taking his eyes off Youngjae’s fidgeting hand on the wheel to focus on the unused white leather of the passenger seat instead.

Youngjae let out a tired sigh. “Nothing Hyunjin-ah, we’re just taking a small detour on our way home, we’ll be back on track in no time.”

Hyunjin shook his head in bewilderment, then turned to look pointedly at Youngjae, even as the other's gaze remained in front of him as they neared the turning into the main road that led to the royal residence.

“I’m not stupid hyung.” He scowled, barely containing his irritation at being so blatantly lied to. His desperation to know what had happened was approaching unbearable.

The older took a second to take a turn into another street before he replied, “Well, I’d say your actions today would beg to differ-“ 

“I wanna know what the hell is going on right now!” He caught the older sending him a withering glare through the rear-view mirror. 

Hyunjin wasn’t about to give a shit. 

He’d never attempted to use his authority as a royal to get his way, and he knew it would never actually work on the people who had literally raised him, but at that specific moment in time, there was nothing he wanted more than to be taken seriously for once and demand the older to stop the car and give him a straight answer without any deflections dammit. 

“We’re just picking up Jaebum hyung on our way,” He took another abrupt turn. Hyunjin gritted his teeth before he could start swearing, reminding himself that disrespecting his hyung was never the way to go. “You should be happy! You’re finally gonna get what you wanted. Your death wish will come true sooner than anticipated.” He was trying to redirect the conversation back to him. It only confirmed Hyunjin’s suspicions. 

Letting out a defeated sigh, he stopped trying to poke the older any further and just forced himself to regulate his breathing and heartbeat back to normal, everything was going to be okay, they’re literally in the heart of the capital, surely no one would be so stupid as to do anything when they had half the Corean army on their side ready to fight back, he told himself, trying to figure out where Youngjae was taking him instead to give his mind something else to do. 

For a good second Hyunjin really thought they were going back to the palace and he actually contemplated just booking it out of the car the moment they turned into the street to go through with his plan, but the older passed the street without hesitation, driving them all the way to the end of the long road, which Hyunjin knew for a fact connected to Ahopsan forest.

The 400 year old bamboo forest was private property of the royal family and one they had treasured dearly for generations due to its historical significance and value to the nation, so Hyunjin was confused when they weren’t stopped at any point, noticing the deserted guardhouse as the older sped through the gates, driving them to the very edge of the paved road, trampling the first line of grass as he haphazardly parked the car and took off his seatbelt. 

“Where- wait!“ Alarmed, Hyunjin surged forward to grab a hold of the older before he could step out, but he’d slipped out of his grasp and out of the car so quickly Hyunjin found himself almost dumbfounded. He opened his door to follow him, but before he could even set a foot through the frame, the door was closed shut, making him jerk in surprise and look up to an agitated Youngjae. 

“You, stay here.” He ground out, pinning Hyunjin in his place with a stern glare, daring him to move even an inch. Hyunjin incredulously searched the older’s eyes to see if he was actually being serious, the heavy mix of anxiety and dread boiling in his gut as he heard the door locks click. 

He’d locked him in. 

He’d actually locked him in the fucking car and left. 

“Wait-“ Spluttering in exasperation, he hastily pulled the door handles, repeatedly smacking the window in desperation when it unsurprisingly didn’t open. “Hyung!”

“We’ll be right back!” Youngjae yelled out dismissively, disappearing behind the bamboo culms in a matter of seconds without throwing Hyunjin a glance. 

Hyunjin kicked the driver’s seat, running his hand through his hair in frustration, wanting to kick and kick until the car was completely totalled. 

The last time he’d seen Youngjae that scared was seven years ago when the older had forcefully gotten onto the ambulance that was taking Jaebum to the hospital after the fire. Recalling the memory made the pit in his stomach grow triple in size. Youngjae’s tone indicated that Jaebum was in a lot of danger, and there was no one guarding the entrance to the forest, which meant the guards were needed elsewhere… or dead…

That was bad… That was really bad… 

He felt himself start shaking, knowing exactly what was coming.

‘Don’t go in alone…’   ‘Wait for backup…’ 

Youngjae had been worried Jaebum couldn’t handle the situation alone, and Jaebum was the most capable of them all… 

But if Jaebum hadn’t called for backup, then- 

He had called to notify Youngjae and get reassurance that they were at a safe enough distance from the incident. To see if Hyunjin was going to be safe. 

To get Hyunjin as far away from there as possible. 

Letting out something between a sigh and a growl, he bunched up his legs on the white leather seats so they would stop fidgeting, burying his head between his legs, and covering his ears with his arms. 

He felt more useless than ever. No one was telling him anything as usual, he lost his chance at protecting the only family that he had left, and now, once again, they were in immediate danger because of him and he couldn’t do anything about it.

He was the most worthless prince this kingdom had ever s- 

BANG! 

He jolted in his place, feeling every single muscle in his body seize up all at once, his breath caught in his throat in horror. He hesitantly unwrapped himself after a few seconds of chilling silence, trembling, praying to God, to every deity, to anybody who would listen to his prayers that he’d heard wrong. 

That that hadn’t been a gunshot. 

When the second bullet tore through the air, Hyunjin felt himself moving before his brain even had time to register what he was doing. 

“No, no no no no no no…”

He scrambled to pull the door locks and handles again as if he hadn’t already tried that before, banging his hands on the windows in panic and aggravation when they unsurprisingly didn’t give in.  

“No no no… Fuck! Fucking open already!“ he felt nauseated, feeling a lump so impossibly big form in his throat he felt like he was being suffocated. 

When he heard the third and fourth shots he started kicking the front passenger window trying to shatter the glass, hanging onto the headrest and the wheel to put all his power in his legs.

“This isn’t real, this isn’t real. It's not real- please it can’t be real…”

A broken sob ripped from his lips as he realized the window wouldn’t break no matter how many times or how hard he tried to kick it in.

All of the royal guard’s cars had bulletproof glass.

He delivered one last kick to the glass out of spite, his hands unsteady as he ran them through his hair, mind working fiercely as he tried to think of a solution, another way out, anything.

“This can’t be happening. It can’t. Please it can’t it can’t it can’t…”  

His pleas were desperate and futile in the suffocating car, he got back up to check the backseats to see if he could somehow get into the trunk, shaking, breaths quickening with fear because there had to be something, a wrench, a hammer, anything that could make an impact on the glass. 

That’s when he remembered what else all the cars belonging to the royal guard had in common. 

Surging back over the console, he started blindly feeling under the drivers seat and sure enough, he found the secret compartment the hyungs thought he didn’t know about, pulling the gun out of the hidden pocket and bringing it up to examine.

The last time he’d held a gun in his hand was when he had been 15. 

It wasn't the standard handgun permitted to all official Corean special forces. It was a semi-automatic Cz75, a pistol only professional shooters would choose, which meant this was most probably Mark’s car. 

A semi-automatic could take a man down with one shot, the bulletproof glass should give in after three or four focused shots on the same spot with the advantage that he’d be shooting from the witness side.  

He checked the magazine to see it was half empty, praying to God that his calculations weren’t wrong and the ten bullets he had left would do the job.

The rapid spray of gunfire coming from the forest was what startled him out of his stupor, springing him back into action. Adrenaline pumping through his veins, he kneeled down on the driver's seat to aim at the window he’d been kicking earlier, focusing on steadying his shaking hands, only to remember he hadn’t covered his eyes or ears when he fired the first shot. 

The recoil was so hard that he flinched, the deafening burst of the bullet amplified in the enclosed cabin of the car to the point he felt like his ears were bleeding afterwards, a steady ringing drowning out everything else.

Fuck…

He whimpered in pain, blinking to get rid of the flashes of white on his eyelids. There was no time for him to look for anything protective to cover his ears so he bunched up his shoulders in hopes his uncle’s scarf would cover them enough for him not to go deaf before shooting the same spot three more times. 

The sixth bullet finally managed to penetrate the glass, shattering it just enough for him to kick the vulnerable spot in and push the rest to the side, squeezing his body through the opening he’d created. He landed on the ground on his palms, shaky arms threatening to give out under his weight as he struggled to pull the rest of his body out of the car. 

His legs were running towards the forest before his body even had time to stand up properly, blinking away the mix of sweat and tears blinding his vision and panting as if he’d been exercising for hours before this, his anxiety fuelling the adrenaline running through his veins.

They can’t be dead. They can’t... they can’t they can’t they can’t they can’t…

“Youngjae hyung?!” He called out, hardly able to hear his own voice through his sobs and the loud ringing in his ear. The only thing he’d had was his sight and even that was impaired by the early morning fog taking up the entire forest floor, weaving through the clumps of bamboo poles until he could barely see where he was going, stumbling over roots and bumping into branches as he blindly navigated through the forest. 

“Jaebum hyung!”

They’re gonna be okay. They’re okay. They’re- Please be okay- please just- you can’t be dead- 

He was running so fast and was so distracted from constantly whipping his head around that he couldn’t stop himself quick enough before he reached the edge of the hill. It felt like he was tumbling down for hours and by the time his body finally rolled to a stop, he felt like he’d been run over by a bulldozer, bunched up into a ball on a wet patch of grass, stock still like a stone. 

He finally managed to get his pathetic whimpering under control after what felt like an hour, slowly unwrapping himself, already dreading the pain that he knew was coming after his adrenaline rush passed. His head was spinning so hard he had to stay still just to not fall over on the ground again. 

When he felt like he could finally open his eyes without puking his empty stomach out, he slowly blinked his eyes open, not expecting the light that he was greeted with. His heart dropped to his stomach.

How long had he been lying on the ground, drowning in his own pity while his hyungs were out there literally fighting for their lives?

In the time he’d wasted whimpering like a pitiful child, the sun had finally started to come up, the fog weaving through the trees looking almost ethereal where it was highlighted by sunrays shining through branches, but the false semblance of peace did nothing to ease the sinking feeling in his chest. 

Because there was nothing peaceful about the sound of gunshots echoing around a forest at barely six am.   

The feeling only worsened when the trees around him suddenly started rustling and a few seconds later a flock of around 30 sparrows rushed past him, making the branches shake as they flew away in panic. He quickly got up on shaky hands, ignoring the pain that shot up his arm and through his whole body at the movement, turning to the direction the birds had charged from, slowly limping to a steady jog.

He wasn’t wasting another second. 

It wasn’t long until he caught a flash of something in the corner of his eyes and he almost got whiplash turning his head in the direction.

“Hyung!” He sobbed out desperately when finally, after what felt like hours of aimless running he saw a black figure through the endless green of the forest, running, running away from him. 

Running in the exact opposite direction of his voice. 

“Hyung wait!!” He can’t hear you…

He felt a strange mix of extreme relief and dread spread through his body as he spotted another figure running not far from the first. They were together, he told himself, they were safe.

They were safe they were safe they were safe…

“Hyung!” There was a thick section of trees separating them, the tightly planted row of bamboo poles making his heart palpitate faster as his focused sight on them flickered with every step they took. 

Getting further and further away… 

Without wasting any more time Hyunjin dove in, bumping and stumbling into the sharp edges of broken canes as he struggled to get to the other side fast enough. He was so focused on not losing sight of them that he didn’t notice the broken roots of a bamboo cluster at the edge of the clearing, tripping and falling onto his hands and knees, the sharp edges cutting through his clothes.

He heard it as he was hurriedly trying to pull his foot out from where it’d gotten stuck, the sound of someone furiously tapping on a table…

         …there are no fucking tables in a forest…

He looked up to witness the exact moment they hit the ground.

…bodies…not moving…on the ground…

His hyung’s bodies on the ground…

As if his brain hadn’t wanted to fully register what he’d just witnessed, he dazedly crawled his way forward on shaky arms, his heart hammering almost louder than the buzzing in his ear and his vision almost completely blinded by tears. 

Barely ten meters away, the cold, almost moist feeling of the mud and stones and hay under his palms turned into a warm, sticky consistency and he went rigid. He hesitantly turned his hand over, feeling bile rise up in his throat when his tear-blinded eyes finally registered what he’d just put his hands on. 

Red. 

Red. 

Red. 

Red.

Red.

Red.

So much fucking Red.

“No,” He choked on a breath, his head shaking in disbelief. 

He was too late. “no, no no no no no…”  Out of panic, he frantically tried to get out of the puddle of blood quickly spreading around the body, bodies, his hyung’s bodies, and he sobbed. He sobbed and sobbed until he could taste the blood in his throat. 

He was so out of it that his reaction came a bit late when firm hands grabbed his shoulders, but all hell broke loose the moment he realised what was happening. He started kicking and screaming, trying his hardest to lose the grip on his body, but it wasn’t working. 

Pulling him up by his underarms, the man finally managed to get him out of the puddle after much struggling but wasn’t prepared for Hyunjin to crumble back to the ground the moment he was set on his own two feet. 

He was hoisted back on his feet by two new hands, the ones keeping him upright from behind gripping his forearms to his chest so tight he couldn’t move an inch while the other rapidly checked all over his body, on his head, his chest, his stomach and back, everywhere. He tried to shake them off, scratch and bite off the hands on his body so they would leave him alone, but the grip wasn’t letting up no matter what he did. 

A feral cry escaped from somewhere deep within him and he broke down in sobs, breathless and limp in the arms of the people who just murdered his hyungs.

Oh God, they were dead. 

They were dead.

Hyunjin could vaguely hear them talking, the ringing in his ears finally starting to subside, but the sound of his own sobs drowned out their voices. He had lost any fight left in his body, the blurry image of two bodies dead on the forest floor still at the forefront of his mind, making him want to just give up altogether.

What was the point in all this struggle anyway?

He would surely end it himself if these guys didn’t manage to finish the job right here. 

“Hyun…”

His sobs had gotten so violent so quick that he felt like he was going to pass out at any moment. He couldn't really tell what was happening around him, only that he was being passed around the two, their grips significantly less rough ever since he’d stopped fighting back. 

“B…” he shook his head, wanting them to just stop.

“…can you hear me?“ Stop talking, stop touching him, stop stalling and just do their job. 

Why won’t it just end already. 

“Hyunjin look at me-“

Hyunjin used the last bits of his energy to thrash around when he felt hands come up to his face, wiping his cheeks and under his eyes as if trying to get rid of the endless tears pouring out that they had caused and he opened his tightly shut eyes for the first time to glare at whoever it was because he didn’t want the memory of the familiar, comforting touches that he associated with his hyungs to be tainted by the very people who had taken them away from him and-

His heart stopped right in its tracks. 

“There we go baby, can you hear me?” hands brushed his dishevelled bangs out of his eyes, “it’s me. It’s hyung. Look, I’m here. Your JaeJae hyungs are here. You’re gonna be okay. We’re right here. You’re okay, you’re okay…” He could hear Jaebum’s voice. It was strangely distant, muffled, almost as if his head was packed with cotton wool, but he could hear it. 

He could hear Jaebum’s voice.

He cradled the younger’s head to his chest a second later, setting his cheek on his head. Hyunjin didn’t know if he was just imagining the rapid thumping he could hear from the older’s heart but he wasn’t complaining when it was literally the only thing keeping him from drowning.

Because Jaebum had been bleeding out on the ground. 

But he was right in front of him. 

He was dead. 

They were both dead.

“You’re okay; You’re okay. You’re okay you’re okay you’re okay,” the older kept muttering right next to his ear, as if he could will it into existence if he said it enough times. 

And you’re dead, Hyunjin wanted to say, but he couldn’t because if there was even a one precent chance that this wasn’t real and he was dreaming of his hyung wrapped around him for the last time he certainly wasn’t going to ruin it by opening his mouth.

The moment he heard Youngjae’s voice though, all doubts of it being a hallucination flew from his mind.

“I swear to God I’m never letting him out of my fucking sight again. You’re grounded for life! Do you hear me? I’ll build a tower and lock you in it myself if I have to but you’re not setting foot out of your room ever again-“

He hurriedly shoved Jaebum off of him with the newfound adrenaline rushing through his veins and pulled himself out of the grip holding him from behind, stumbling back a step when there was no one supporting his weight anymore.

A hand stretched out to grip his arm lest he crumbles to the floor again, Youngjae’s hand. 

The same Youngjae he’d thought was dead on the ground not even two minutes ago.

With fresh tears racing down his cheeks he looked back to his Jaebum hyung who was very much alive and well, standing in front of him, and then his Youngjae hyung whose hand was crawling up the length of his arm to his shoulder, and he was engulfed by both of them a second later when his ragged breathing turned into hiccuped sobs again.  

“It’s okay, honey.” Jaebum brought his head into his neck, and he clung to both of them like his life depended on it, “We’ve got you, Hyung’s got you now, you’re gonna be okay, everything’s gonna be okay,” 

“I thou- I thought-“ A sob wrenched from his body when he recognized the rough texture of his hyungs scarred hand cradling his nape. 

 “I thought you were dead,” 

“We’re right here. You’re okay,” Youngjae shushed him, pulling back from the embrace to wipe his tears away and Hyunjin shook his head, whining in frustration because he- they didn’t understand.

“I thought you were dead,” he wheezed out between ragged breaths and his sobs, and they both winced, pulling him back in the embrace. “I know honey,” His voice had a slightly raspier tone this time as if he was trying to suppress his own emotions. “We’re sorry. We’re sorry baby, we’re okay, we’re right here.”

Jaebum buried himself in Hyunjin’s hair, breathing him in and just for a moment he almost calmed down. 

Until it was all ruined and he was rudely reminded of where they actually were and what was happening around them by the sound of another gunshot, echoing around the woods, not close, but also not far enough for it to be considered in any way shape or form safe for them to still be standing there like they weren’t in an active shooting zone. 

The sound triggered an instant reaction from him, flinching so hard they had to hold onto him tighter before he could shrink to the ground again. He unconsciously grabbed a fistful of each of their jackets in a vice grip, starting to pull them back, out of the puddle of blood growing around them, out of that fucking clearing, out of that forest, out of that city, anywhere, anywhere but there. 

The only problem was, they weren’t budging.

“Hyung please can we- can we please go? Please-“ he choked on his own sobs when he heard another gunshot, not so far away from them anymore, his whole body trembling as he desperately tried to pull both of his hyungs away from where the echo had come from. 

But they weren’t following him….

Why weren’t they following him?

Somehow he’d missed the looks being exchanged over his head while he was freaking out about the nth gunshot he’d heard that day, but as soon as he looked up and saw their faces his stomach rolled.

He knew those faces. 

“Hyunjin-ah,” the tone alone made the back of his throat burn with the sour taste of bile, probably the last bit of water that he’d had left in his body coming back up from his stomach. He was shaking his head no before the older had even started his sentence. 

Jaebum cupped his face, pulling him to a stop, making him stare directly into the eyes that he knew so well by now, the apologetic ones, the same ones he got whenever they knew what they were going to say was not going to go over well with him, the ones he hated the most, “baby, listen to me, we’re all gonna get out of here in a second, okay? We’re gonna be safe at home in a few hours, but hyung needs to do something first alright?” 

He shakily pulled back from the touch, trembling as he turned to face Youngjae, his head still slightly shaking as if needing Youngjae to confirm that what the older had said was just in his head and not actually real.

But Youngjae had the same look in his eyes. 

His breath hitched in his throat and he felt faint as he saw Youngjae’s gaze drop to the ground, his eyes closing as if he hated their plan as much as Hyunjin hated it, as if he didn’t have the power to stop this.

The shots weren’t stopping, more frequent now, faster, as if they were in shooting practice and people were emptying their whole magazines to see if they could hit the bullseye once, even by accident. 

But this wasn’t shooting practice. And the shots weren’t to hit the bullseye, they were to kill.

“Youngjae’s gonna take you back to the car,” 

“No, nononononononon..” His body had started hiccuping out sobs again, his grip on them tightening the more the older tried to pull away, “I’m gonna meet you guys there in five minutes, I just need to make sure-” Hyunjin gripped onto the hand that was trying to make him loosen his grip, “No- no, please, hyung please- you can’t-“ 

“Baby I’ll be so quick you won’t even realise I was gone in the first place-“

“Hyung please don’t- “

“Honey we need to go right now-“ “Hyunjin I need to do this-“

“You can’t leave me again!” He sobbed hysterically, clinging onto both of them as if they were the only pieces of wood in the ocean and he was drowning, “please don’t leave me again…" Suddenly, he was that same little ten year old boy, begging his hyungs to stay and sleep with him on his bed, too afraid to let go of the only people he had left in this world.

There was a moment of silence, the pushing and pulling had stopped, the sound of the gunshots drowned out in the intensity of the moment and both of his hyungs frozen on their spot, eyes shaking as they stared at him. Even his breathing had started to even out a bit. Or maybe he was just holding his breath waiting for their reaction. 

He’d never seen Jaebum cry before. It almost looked painful, the way that one single tear rolled down his face and fell off his cheek. It made something cold and unsettling bloom in his chest and spread through his whole body. 

The older blinked back the rest before they could fall, taking a moment to breathe and collect himself before he painted a bittersweet smile on his face, putting a rough hand on his neck and bending down to his level as if he really was that scared little ten year old, as if he knew this would be the only way to get through to him too.

“Baby, Yeongie hyung is here,” He felt like the floor had been ripped out from underneath him. Dread dug cold, jagged fingers into his gut and the entire room spun out of focus all over again as he tried to process it. 

If Yeong hyung was there that meant-

“-so is his highness,” he stopped breathing altogether at the elder's shaky words, Jaebum was still pursing his lips in that same sad smile of his that Hyunjin never wanted to see again, his lips were starting to tremble though, “and I need you to be-“ an inhale, “I need you, to be safe, while I go check on them, okay? I need to know that you’re safe so I can make sure they’re okay.” He took another pause, the smile had almost completely melted off his face now, “I can’t do that while you’re still here and I can’t take you with me baby, I just- I-“

“okay-“ it left him with an exhale, so quiet it was a wonder the other two could even hear it. His throat closed up immediately after as if it knew how big of a mistake the single word was, wanting to swallow it right back.

But he burned that thought out of his head as soon as it came, loathing himself for even thinking it for a second. 

Because Hyunjin knew he had the power to make all this stop if he really insisted on it. Knew Jaebum was too attached, too protective of him to do anything that would actually hurt him, all those years of lulling him to sleep and helping him through his anxiety attacks, all the gentle parenting, the countless hours of therapy he sat through with him, the fire. 

Leaving him in this state right now would surely leave a big scar and Hyunjin knew the older would never leave if he didn’t explicitly get reassurance that Hyunjin was going to be okay with it. 

But just how selfish could Hyunjin fucking be? To stop Jaebum from making sure his own brother, his own flesh and blood was alright, just so he could feel better? What the fuck was wrong with him?

No. If Yeong hyung and his highness were really here in this mess of bullets and broken canes, without protection, Hyunjin couldn’t even for a second let himself think he had any right keeping any of his hyungs with him. 

So he steeled himself and looked up, with a strong determination in his eyes that he hoped was convincing enough for them to believe the facade of confidence he was putting on and agree to his compromise. 

“Okay,” he said, his voice coming out stronger this time. It clearly indicated the approaching request though and he visibly saw both of their surprised expressions sober up and get an edge of apprehension, he looked them dead in the eyes before he continued, forcing himself to breathe properly. 

“I’ll go back, but Youngjae hyung has to stay with you.” He stopped himself before he could flinch away from their heated gazes, holding their stare even as their brows furrowed and they looked at him as if he had completely lost his mind. 

He didn’t care. It was either this, or he was staying and fighting with them. 

“Not a chance.” “No way I’m letting you go back alone.”

“If his highness is here, they’re not gonna be looking for me-”

“-I don’t care who they’re looking for-“ 

“No one even knows I’m in Corea right now, never mind here-

“Hyunjin you’re not going anywhere alone-“

“-and I didn’t see anyone on my way here either, I’m just gonna go back the way I came.” He was the one trying to distance himself this time, grabbing the hand still anchored on his shoulder to gently move it back, but Jaebum’s grip got tighter when he noticed what he was doing. 

“If they find you, you’re dead.” The gunshot that accompanied Jaebum’s raspy protest was so close that it had Hyunjin shove his hyung’s hand off his shoulder with a newfound urgency and take a step back, looking behind them to see people running through the trees, just a few meters from the clearing now.

“Yeah well if you don’t hurry up, your own brother and the sole monarch of this country will be dead. I’d say I win that argument hyung.” He was hoping the poor humour would lift some of the heavy atmosphere and reassure them that he was gonna be fine, but the icy look he received from Jaebum proved otherwise. The shouts had him turning his head so quick he almost got whiplash. 

They were getting closer.

“Jae-“ Hyunjin looked back to Jaebum to see him exchange another look with Youngjae over his shoulder and a surge of anger ran through his body. “I’m not leaving if he doesn’t stay with you.” His voice came out so firm this time he even surprised himself. 

Just as the older was about to open his mouth in protest, they all heard a panicked shout in the background and all their attention was taken by two figures, one supporting- more like dragging- the other as they stumbled through the last line of bamboo canes and into the clearing. “JAEBUM?!” 

Hyunjin couldn’t see who it was through the ominous fog still taking up most of his vision, but the voice was unmistakeable. It was his highness. 

“Shit.”

Before Hyunjin could even move Jaebum was halfway across the clearing. There were men following them, not too far behind, he couldn’t tell how many, but if his highness was running away from a fight with the imperial bodyguard limp, draped on his shoulder, then it must’ve been enough. 

His eyes focused back on the two figures again, seeing Jaebum turn around halfway, shouting for him to run and reality finally hit Hyunjin, making him reluctantly take a few steps back into the shadows, feeling his chest tighten with anxiety. 

Next thing he knew there were nails digging into his arm and dragging him away. 

“No- hyung, wait!” He yelled, trying to pull his arm out of Youngjae’s vice grip. The older was running at such a fast pace Hyunjin almost couldn’t keep up. “You need to go back to them!” He tried to put all his power into pulling them to a stop, but the older had been expecting it and pulled him so abruptly and with so much force that it had Hyunjin stumbling over his own feet, almost crashing into the ground had Youngjae not been there to catch him. 

He was forcefully pushed down behind a big stone a few seconds later, Youngjae’s calculating face appearing in front of him. The older started checking him over right away, panting as he pushed away Jinyoung’s now bloody scarf that was somehow still secured around his neck, running his trembling hands over the tears in his clothes and lifting his shirt up to inspect his injuries as if he had to really make sure the red covering his whole body hadn’t been his blood. 

Hyunjin swatted his hands away and sat up on his elbows, fixing the older with a desperate glare that the older completely ignored, getting up to look around. “Hyung please go back to them.” 

Hyunjin felt like he was talking to a wall. The older wasn’t even sparing him a glance as he sprinted all around the area, scouring the place behind any bush or set of bamboo poles, probably checking for any threats in their vicinity. 

He was familiar with this behaviour. They always got like this when they were on edge, calculating, going completely silent until they had formed a plan in their heads. Looking at Youngjae right now, anyone would think he’s got everything under control, but Hyunjin could read the distress on his face from a mile away.

“Hyung.” 

Hyunjin was almost startled when the older abruptly turned back at his call but deflated when he realised he’d still not gotten his attention when the older rushed back behind the stone only to take some rounds out of his waistband.

Hyunjin wiped the frustrated tears off his face, not caring about the blood still tainting his hands mixing with the tear tracks on his cheeks. He tried to call out to him again, but there was no point. The older’s attention was solely taken up by the guns he had taken out of his holster, his hands slightly trembling as he worked fast to reload them. 

Hyunjin covered his eyes, defeated.  

There was an agonizing scream that got both of their attentions and he looked over the older’s shoulder to the line of trees that were now covering his view of the clearing, his heart almost beating out of his chest at the thought that that could be his hyung. He startled and looked back over when he heard the gun’s magazine click.

“Look at me kid,” He tried to focus on Youngjae, but he couldn’t shake off the images his head was rapidly conjuring, images of the foggy green of the forest, tainted with a deep shade of red and death, and his hyungs right in the middle of it all.

Rough hands cupped his tear-stricken face, forcing him to look up into shaking eyes. “Look at me. I need you to listen to me and listen well,” The older locked him in his unwavering gaze, not letting him look away for even a second. “Forget about what Jaebum said. No one is going anywhere alone. I’m going back there to make sure everything is okay, then we’re gonna all get out of here together. You’re gonna take this, and wait here.” A gun, one of the guns the older had been loading before, was pressed into his hands. Youngjae clasped both his hands around it as if wanting to make sure that Hyunjin had a good grip on it before he let go. The metal was warm in his palms. 

“If you see anyone, if anyone even tries to come close, you shoot. Do you understand me?“ 

“Hyu-“ He didn’t get a chance to get a word out before Youngjae was shouting in his face. “You stay here and you shoot, Hyunjin! Do you understand?!” 

A choked sob escaped him, Hyunjin bit his bottom lip til he could taste blood. 

“I need you to say it.” Youngjae shook his grip on his hands as if trying to get him to come to himself and finally answer him. Hyunjin felt faint as he tried not to break eye contact, throat stinging as he muttered yes under his breath. 

“Hyunjin if I find out you moved a centimetre from behind this stone so help me God,” the older gritted out. A scream shattered the air. Both of their heads snapped to where it came from. The older cursed under his breath, jumping to his feet and running back towards the clearing. “Don’t fucking move. I’ll be right back,” He shouted behind his back as he got to the line of trees covering the clearing.

Hyunjin was alone again. 

He could feel his heart pounding in his chest, hands shaking around the warm gun in his hands, his vision starting to blur again.

The sound of gunshots hadn’t stopped yet.

Seconds felt like hours, every single micro sound made him flinch.

He kept his eyes on the empty magazines Youngjae had carelessly thrown on the ground, trying to keep his focus on the metal and the intruding thoughts out of his head. 

It had started drizzling. 

Small droplets were slowly collecting on the dark metal of the magazines and on the left-over bullets and his uncle’s bloodied cashmere scarf and there was a shout of his hyung’s name echoing around the forest and suddenly, as if on autopilot, Hyunjin was on his feet and sprinting.

He only realised where his feet had taken him when he got to the last row of trees surrounding the clearing, stopping himself right before anyone could realise he was there.

It was a mess. 

There were orders being thrown around everywhere, mostly from his hyungs, which made the job of spotting them a lot easier. 

The chief imperial bodyguard was leant up against a tall stone pillar that Hyunjin had somehow completely missed earlier, one hand holding up a handgun and the other on his hip where an alarmingly big red spot was forming. 

He forced himself to stay rooted to the ground before he could sprint past the tree line and expose himself. His heart felt like a dead weight inside his chest.

His eyes snapped to the left when he heard a disgusting gurgle, watching as a man crumbled to the ground, one knife in his neck and another in his chest, spluttering blood on the previously pristine green grass. He spotted Youngjae a second later, running over from the smaller pillar where he’d been taking shelter and bending down to pull the knives out of the body. 

He crouched down before Youngjae could see him, his eyes flitting to the right where the older had aimed his knives at another guy’s back, watching him take out two more and aim them at the group gathered at the other side of the clearing as he sprinted to his second target to retrieve the old knives.

It wasn’t long before he spotted Jaebum and the king in the middle of that very crowd. 

Hyunjin almost stepped out of the treeline when he saw his highness take a hit to his stomach, but hesitated when Youngjae ran past him to get to the group.

No, he couldn’t do this. He would mess up everything if he stepped in now. They seemed to have things mostly under control. If the hyungs realised he was there, it would all be over. They would lose their focus immediately and in a fight like this, even a second of hesitancy could cost you your life.

“Youngjae get them out of here!” It felt like no matter how many men the hyungs killed, two more appeared in their place. 

“Shut up Jaebum!” Youngjae shouted back as he rolled on the ground, dodging a bullet by an inch. 

“You both need to fucking shut up!” Shouted Yeong hyung, shooting the man coming up behind his highness and almost popping a vein while doing it.  

He almost couldn’t handle what he was watching, flinching every time someone was unfortunate enough to get in his hyungs’ way, holding himself back from doing anything whenever one of the men managed to land a hit. He didn’t recognise any of them, but he could tell they were Lee Lim’s men. That part was obvious from the way they fought. How they had broken into the royal property in broad daylight, Hyunjin couldn’t wrap his head around.

In the midst of everything though, there was one thing that was glaringly clear to Hyunjin.   

Their main target wasn’t the king.  

There was blood everywhere, knives lodged into trees, gunshots tearing through the air, but their first priority was without a doubt getting to the object in the king’s possession, whatever it was. 

The hyungs would pass it around whenever the load was too much to handle alone and the swarm of men would follow it like a pack of wolves chasing down their first prey after a long winter. It was almost comical, except there were over twenty left of them and out of the four currently fighting on their side, one was injured and rooted to one spot.

His stomach churned. 

The four of them were some of the best, if not the best, fighters and shooters in the nation, but they were visibly getting worn out. 

His highness’ moves weren’t as sharp as usual, he looked tired, who knows how long they’d already been fighting, Youngjae was trying to take out as many as he could as fast as possible but with no ammunition his knives weren’t helping him out much, and Jaebum, being the protective, dutiful man that he is, was more concerned about his highness than his own safety so he was taking the hits that the king wasn’t blocking, taking on his brother’s post. 

They didn’t look like they could hold them off for much longer, it was only a matter of time before another one of them got seriously injured and they would have no chance after that.

You need to do something.

His head was following the object wherever it was thrown as if he was watching a very violent, very bloody tennis match, a punch, a bullet, a knife flying in the air as men fell one after another, all to get to that damned object. It seemed like a never-ending push and pull. 

What the hell are you gonna do? Throw yourself between them and ask them to stop fighting? That this is not them? That they’re better than this? What the hell can you even do? Are you good for anything? 

Yeong shot a guy trying to approach Youngjae from behind, cursing loudly as he pressed the magazine release and realised he was out of ammo. 

Came all the way here and for what? Just to give the hyungs one more thing to worry about? Another headache. If you hadn’t been there in the first place this whole thing wouldn’t have even escalated this far. All because you wanted to act like a hero, like the attention whore that you are. 

And then it happened. His highness threw it to Jaebum, collapsing on the ground heaving, and Jaebum who had been just a few meters away had not been prepared for the mob that pounced on him all at once. There were arms flying everywhere, some trampling bodies on the ground to get to what was in the older’s hand. In a rare moment of freedom Jaebum pulled his arm back to throw it to Youngjae, but a hand pulled at his shoulder at the last moment and for a second, it felt like time had slowed down as the object, which Hyunjin now realised was only a piece of carved wood, fell on the ground some meters away, close to the very tree line Hyunjin was hiding behind. 

It was right there, collecting raindrops on the wet grass, just like the empty magazines had been. 

Helpless. 

Useless. 

Always the one to be saved, and never to do the saving. 

The group let Jaebum go the second it was out of his hands and scattered, running around to look for it on the overgrown grass. 

Orders. 

Following orders and staying put, that was Hyunjin.

Youngjae was running and dodging men as he tried to get to the other side of the clearing fast enough. 

Helpless.

Helpless.

Helpless.

He heard Yeong hyung groan, propping his hand holding his empty gun on the ground to get up and limp to the piece of wood that people were killing themselves over.

“RUN FASTER IDIOTS!”

Helpless…

…Not anymore. 

He got to it just a few seconds before one of the men could, clutching it in both hands and making a run for it.

“NO!” Was screamed from about a hundred different directions, among them four voices he could recognise anywhere, but Hyunjin was too far gone into the haze of his past failures to care.

He’d been about to turn around and run back into the woods, but he quickly scratched that thought when he saw just how many men were blocking his exit, thinking on his feet and sprinting to the next opening. 

“Hyunjin!!” 

“Hyunjin! What the hell are you doing?!”

He didn’t let himself look up. The rain made the grass slippery. The men were catching up. They’d been fast to figure out his plan and had blocked the second exit before Hyunjin could get to it, taking advances on him. 

The hyungs kept shouting. They sounded furious. Hyunjin tried to block them out. He knew Youngjae and Jaebum were trying to get to him as well. Had they not been so busy getting rid of the men chasing him, he probably would’ve been tackled to the ground and dragged away by his scruff by now.

He looked back to the two pillars to see if there were people blocking the opening on the other side of it too, but was completely thrown off when instead of the trees and grass he was expecting, there was a sheen of water in between the two mismatched stones, reflecting the trees almost like fluid glass, the reflection breaking into more pieces the closer he got to the pillars, as if impacted by-

It looked like-

His heart almost hammered out of his chest when it finally clicked in his head, when he realized just what he was holding in his hands. It all made sense now. Everything. Everything made sense. 

Holy shit. 

“HYUNJIN DONT!”

His sudden change of direction arose a new round of shouts, this time mostly from the hyungs, more panicked than he’d ever heard them sound. There were a couple of men running to the pillars to intercept him, but he knew the hyungs would get to them before they got to him.

He could stop everything. This was the only way. It would get the men away from his family, give the hyungs enough time to breathe and regroup and Lee Lim will never get his hands on the flute. 

He picked up his speed as much as he could, hands tightening around the broken piece of the instrument and the gun as he side stepped a guy charging at him. A screech escaped him when a knife narrowly missed his shoulder, forcing himself not to look back as he heard someone scream way too close behind him. 

“HYUNJIN STOP!” Jaebum yelled out, voice rather shrill with the mixture of fear and breathlessness.

In his periphery he could see men falling left and right. In a matter of what must have been only a few seconds more than half of the men were taken down. He let that thought fuel his adrenaline, silencing everything else out. 

Just a little more Hyunjin.

There was a gunshot directly to his right. His head snapped in alarm and he made eye contact with Jaebum. 

His Jaebum hyung who looked like he was burning in that fire all over again as he watched him run directly into an abyss neither of them knew the end of. 

I’m sorry hyung, but I couldn’t let you get hurt. 

He closed his eyes and braced himself before jumping through. 

For a second it felt like he was getting electrocuted, his skin tingling as he landed on his hands and knees on wet grass. 

His ears had started ringing again and this time there was a loud banging echoing through them too. He shakily wrapped his biceps around his ears, falling into a fatal position on the mess of wet grass and mud beneath him.

The sobs wracking his body combined with the strong buzz still running through were making him lightheaded. The look in his hyungs eyes was burned onto the back of his eyelids, making him wrench miserably. 

In the middle of his miserable wrenching and what felt like his tenth anxiety attack of the day, his ears picked up on voices approaching. He jolted up instantly, looking for the direction of the voices. 

“Dude, I’m telling you it’s right behind this corner. I’ve been here more often than you’ve visited your parents in the last five years. I know my way around this place.”

“Yeah and that’s why we’ve been wasting our time running in circles for the last two hours looking for the two stupid pillars that were featured in one episode of a stupid kdrama for five seconds.”

Pillars. They were looking for the gate that he’d just crossed. 

“Hey, I thought you wanted to see them too, I wouldn’t have insisted on it if you wanted to do something else…”

“Aish- now look what you’ve done… you made her sad again…” 

They were close. Hyunjin couldn’t stay there. 

He went to pick up the flute and Youngjae’s gun that he had let go of the second he’d fallen through the portal, not expecting to be electrocuted by the piece of broken wood at point of contact.

The guttural scream he let out was entirely justified by the amount of pain and agony he felt in that moment. 

He was wheezing through his breaths for a while before he even let himself process what had just happened to him. 

“What the hell was that?”

The panic that went through his body at the thought of anyone finding him there like that overpowered his fear. Hoping his uncle’s scarf would be a good enough buffer, he untied the knot around his neck, wrapped the fabric around his hand and reached for the flute with shaking hands. Relief rushed through him when he only felt the outline of it in his fist.

“Is someone out there?! Are you hurt?!” 

He almost let out another scream when he tried to push off the ground to stand up, clasping a hand on his mouth before they could hear his whimpers. He reluctantly looked down at the source of his agony to see his left ankle swollen, throbbing red and he cursed so loud in his head he wondered if they could hear it.

Just what he fucking needed.

“Oh my God! There he is!”

“Are you okey sir?!”

Fuck. Fuckfuckfuckfuck.

Hyunjin had just enough time to grab the gun and hide it in the scarf before they got to him. 

“Oh my God he’s bleeding! Baek he’s bleeding!” 

“Fucking Christ!”

Hyunjin thanked whichever God was hearing his prayers that they didn’t get close enough to touch him. 

“Don’t just stand there! Do something!”

“What do you want me to do? Stop the bleeding with my bare fucking hands?”

“Baek he’s been stabbed!”

He didn't know how the girl could be so certain, but he imagined there could be no other explanation for his drenched-in-blood attire so he kept his head low and stayed stock still, just waiting for an opportunity. 

“Okay fuck. Okay. Of fucking course there’s no fucking service in this godforsaken place!”

Instead of the sigh of relief he wanted to let out at the news, another violent wrench made him bend over, ripping out some strands of grass as his body tried to empty his stomach’s non-existent contents. He sucked in a sob threatening to escape right after. 

“Fuck alright. Just- fuck just keep an eye on him. I’ll go see if I can get signal somewhere or a ranger- or- whatever fucking help I can get- just don’t stop calling the police.”

“Where the fuck do you think you’re going?!” 

One down, two to go…

“Sir can you hear me? Can you tell me who did this to you?” He stiffened when he felt the girl lean in, her hand hovering over his shoulder. 

“Wonnie get back! Don’t touch him! Don’t let Wonnie near him! I’ll be right back!” 

“Shit.” 

“Hey Wonnie come here, come here, don’t look at him.”

Hyunjin took a quick glance up to see if they were still staring at him and took his chance to scamper away the moment he saw the guy had turned his back to him, the girl’s head buried in his neck. 

He clasped his free hand on his mouth, biting down his whimpers and limping as fast and as quietly as was humanly possible in his state. He collapsed behind a few thick trees after a few minutes, not able to hold out on his injured foot too long without a crutch. He hoped they wouldn’t follow him. 

He knew from way too many dance practice mishaps that it was definitely not broken. Probably only a sprain which would heal in a week or two. That was if he actually did what he was supposed to, and rested. Running around in a forest after his nth anxiety attack on no fuel and next to no sleep was not exactly resting, but he had no other choice at the moment. 

He had no idea where he was or who he was and until he figured that out he couldn’t show his face anywhere. He could be a wanted criminal for all he knew. The possibilities were endless really. 

If the myths he used to hear as a child about family heirlooms and doors to fantastical worlds were true, which he now pitifully realises they were, absolutely anything could be possible. 

He had to sort out a plan. Where he was going, where he was staying, how he was going to get back…

He hissed out in blinding hot pain when a branch grazed his side lightly. 

Before deciding anything, he had to stay alive first.  

Chapter Text

He was going to faint any second now. 

He had been walking for ten hours. Or at least that's what it felt like… 

The formidable feeling that he had to get away from that forest as soon as possible was probably the only thing keeping him on his feet, limping and stumbling from tree to tree -probably setting the perfect blood trail for the police to follow- until he was finally out of those cursed fucking woods. 

There had been absolutely no way he was going to let any sort of authorities know of his existence, so allowing the people who had found him to call paramedics was not an option. He could not cross paths with any authorities. Not when he didn’t know where he was. Or even who he was…

And so, he hadn’t let himself stop or settle anywhere lest they were still looking for him and the police were called. 

Luckily, he’d found a small public bathroom just outside the gates so he didn’t have to stumble around the streets of Busan with blood and dirt all over his face. He tried to avoid looking at himself as much as possible as he splashed the icy cold sink water on his face, trying to wipe off the dried blood on his cheeks and his hairline as well as he could with the cheap hand soap available. He was lucky if he hadn’t already gotten an infection with so many open cuts and scrapes and two people’s blood all over his body. 

There was no way he was going to get his previously-drenched-in-blood, now-scrunchy-sticky-hay-like hair clean without any sort of product so he gave up on trying to wash it almost immediately. His long black hair had a red, almost rusty tint to it now. 

He hated it. 

He made quick work of washing off the rest of the blood on visible parts of his body, but he lost track of time when it came to his hands, the tips of his fingers had gone numb from how long he had been scrubbing and scraping at the dried blood under his fingernails under the freezing water. He tried to contain his sobs while doing it.

He already knew he had blood on his hands, he didn’t need a constant reminder of it. 

Checking the entrance of the public bathroom every few seconds, he pulled out almost all of the paper towels left in the supplier and soaked it under water in a pathetic attempt at an ice pack for his ankle, hissing as he lightly pressed it on the agitated skin. He knew, logically, this was not gonna help him much at all, but it numbed the pain for a few seconds and that was more than he could ask for in his situation.

He had balled up the scarf and fled the moment he’d heard chattering outside the bathroom. 

Now he was somewhere in, what he presumed, was the richer district of town, trying to look inconspicuous as he wobbled on his feet passing expensive brand stores and aesthetic cafés. He’d had no idea where he was going when he got out of the forest, so he’d just taken the most crowded street he’d come across, hoping to blend in with the crowd and go unseen. That didn’t really work out in his favour though when the crowd consisted of snobby and judgmental rich people. 

He definitely regretted that decision now. 

He knew he stood out like a sore thumb, could feel the stares following him as he passed people on the street, could imagine what they were whispering in each other's ears.

None of it was helping his anxiety either.

He tried to ignore them, to come up with a plan, but he couldn’t focus on anything. In all honesty he had no idea where he was going. All he knew was that he was freezing and his whole body hurt and he couldn't keep walking on his sprained ankle if he ever wanted to be able to dance again. 

When the weight of the stares finally got to be too much, he took the first exit out of the street without even looking where he was going, hoping it would be less crowded so he could escape the disgusted glares and loud whispers. He had to do that two more times before he finally found a narrower street. 

Before he could get a chance to look at his surroundings though, he collapsed against a brick wall. One miscalculated step and he was tumbling down the sidewalk, whimpering like a pitiful mutt on the ground.

He felt warmth under his lids again. 

What? All that talk about protecting the people you love and trying to act like a hero and now that you don’t have the support of the hyungs behind your back for five seconds you’re crumbling like a pathetic sand castle? Crying like a little baby as soon as something doesn’t go your way?

He was shivering like a leaf, the icy wind penetrating straight through his tattered clothes and freezing the wet spots. 

Weak as a lamb that can’t stand the weight of its own wool. 

He whimpered as he tried to straighten his legs on the ground. 

A disgrace to the royal family really. The hyungs would question how they raised an incompetent bastard like you. 

Stopstopstopstopstopstop not. here. 

He forced his eyes open and tried to focus on something, anything before his thoughts could spiral out of control again and render him defenceless in a foreign environment, clutching the flute and the gun wrapped in his hyung's scarf to ground himself. 

The street was empty for the most part which he was extremely grateful for. There was a restaurant on the other side of the street in front of him, but it also looked mostly empty. There were some people lingering around, but no one had noticed him yet. 

He dragged his eyes away from the restaurant when he heard a door bang some twenty meters away from him. A well-dressed man walked out, pulling a pack of cigarettes and a lighter out of his inner pocket. He noticed the other guy only after the well-dressed man passed him a cigarette. 

Hyunjin thanked God that they started talking right away. Listening to meaningless conversations always helped pull him out of attacks before they fully took over. This was good. It was good. 

“What did he want you to do this time?” 

“I swear to God one of these days I’m gonna deck the guy in the face. The bastard thinks just because he got the job a few months before I did he can boss me around like I’m his bitch or something. So what the cunt gave him her post when she left for her fucking vacation? He’s technically still not promoted.” 

“I feel you man.” 

“So where’s the bane of your existence?”

“Gone fetching like the good boy that he is.” 

“Did he leave his coat again? I’m fucking freezing.” The well-dressed man stepped towards what looked like a small booth, opening the door and pulling out a red parka jacket. 

“Help yourself. Bastard hasn’t touched it even once today. Makes me look fucking weak next to him wearing it.”

“Don’t worry ‘bout it dude. It’s natural after all, mutts like him don’t need it anyway.” 

They chuckled among each other for a bit. Hyunjin didn’t know what his face looked like at that moment listening to the two, but the conversation had at least distracted him from his negative thoughts. 

He had no control over the negative thoughts rapidly forming in his head for those two though. 

“By the way did you see the two hotties that came in today? I can’t wait to see what they look like under all those clothes.”

“Yo! Send me the videos this time you fucker. Don’t be greedy like last time! Sharing is caring.”

What the fuck ?!

He closed his eyes as if that could erase what he’d just heard coming out of their filthy mouths.  

Oh God. How were these types of people even real ? How???

If he’d been in his own country he’d immediately have those two investigated and prosecuted. They’d be thrown in jail within days under his watch. Filthy bastards-

“Hey!” He froze when he realised he hadn’t heard them talking for a good minute. The tone seemed off too. 

He braced himself when he heard footsteps approaching.

“Hey, you!” He reluctantly opened his eyes to glare at the guy when he got down on his level. “What are you deaf or something?”

“What.” He spat out, snapping his eyes to point a death glare at the asshole who’d gotten in his face.

“This is a five-star hotel. Important people come here. They’re not gonna wanna see one of your kind anywhere near where they’re gonna sleep. Go set up camp somewhere else.”

Hyunjin clenched his jaw so hard, any harder and his teeth would start breaking.

The hyungs would’ve-

No. The hyungs weren’t there. They wouldn’t do anything. You don’t have anyone to protect you anymore. Get that through your fucking head. 

“Hey! Did you not just hear what he said? You can’t beg around here. Pack up your shit and piss off!” He almost screamed when the asshole kicked him in the shin, bracing himself on his left arm and biting on his tongue before he could curse up a storm and make a scene.

There was a staticky noise and a mumbled curse. He glared back at the two to see the well-dressed asshole had turned his back to him, fidgeting with something in his hand. 

“Motherfucker finally noticed I was gone, I gotta get back before he tattles again, get the scum out of here before anyone sees him…” he grunted, throwing his lit cigarette bud right at Hyunjin’s feet, taking the red parka off and handing it to the other asshole as he stalked off. 

Hyunjin imagined himself kicking the bitch in the face as he walked back through the grand golden doors. 

“Come on, get up.” He drawled. 

When Hyunjin didn’t make any move to get up, the asshole gripped his left upper arm and violently pulled him up on his feet, dragging him to the edge of the sidewalk. Hyunjin couldn’t stop himself from cursing this time, abruptly pulling his arm out of the other’s grip. 

“Get the fuck out of here before I call the fucking police to scrape you off the sidewalk!”

Some colourful curses were forming in his head but before he could voice them, a car drove by them to the entrance of the hotel and he saw the guy’s eyes flash over to it, mumbling a curse under his breath.

He looked in the distance and cursed again when he didn’t find what he was looking for, turning his head back to him with a vicious glare. “When I get back I better not see you still lingering around here or else-“ He shoved him away one more time before he sprinted back to his booth, haphazardly throwing the red parka in, before running to bow at the newly arrived guests getting out of their car. 

Hyunjin scoffed at the false show of respect, shaking his head as the asshole accepted the keys from the woman with both hands outstretched and his head bowed, scuffling to the driver’s seat to go park the car.

The people in his world were definitely more well-mannered than that. 

He tried to take a step again, but quickly found himself leaning back on the wall he’d just gotten pulled off of, resentfully looking back at the hotel, finding no one he could direct his anger to. 

His eyes caught on the red parka jacket instead though and it wasn’t long before a petty thought started forming in his head. As if the universe was playing a sick joke (or maybe giving him a sign), a strong wind almost made his knees buckle under him, making him shiver so hard his teeth started chattering. 

He’d never thought of stealing before that day but desperate times called for desperate measures. 

He shuddered as he put the jacket on, his body welcoming the warmth that greeted him with such ease he never wanted to take it off again.

Revenge never tasted so sweet. 

The sound of a car screeching to a stop in front of him snapped him out of the moment. Before he knew it a door was slammed shut and a guy was walking towards him, eyes glued to his phone, one hand dangling his car keys like a bell before he unceremoniously threw them at him. Hyunjin fumbled to catch it, holding up the keys against his chest with his scarf-covered hand, too in shock to do anything else. 

“Indoors. And if I find a scratch on her later, you can kiss your job goodbye.” The guy instructed, side-eying him for a second before walking passed him towards the hotel. 

“But-“

“You’ll get your tip when I’m back.” And with that he disappeared behind the doors, leaving Hyunjin frozen in his spot in the middle of the sidewalk. 

What the hell am I supposed to do now? he thought to himself as he nervously looked around to see if the asshole from before was anywhere near or if someone saw him receiving the keys. 

He contemplated doing the asshole’s job for him for a second. 

That was until another thought suddenly occurred to him.

No… He couldn’t do that…

Yes, you could. You have to. It’s your best chance at survival. 

The jacket was one thing, but a car?

You literally have no money, no phone, no place to go to, no person you can trust, no identity, you can’t walk properly, you haven’t eaten or drunk anything for over a day and your entire body feels like a football team used it as their training ball. What other choice do you have?

It’s someone’s car!

The asshole who threatened to get you fired for a scratch without even checking to see if you were an actual valet or not. Not to mention the fact that the car is a Porsche. Anyone who can afford a Porsche can deal with their car disappearing for a few days.

It would get the people working there in trouble. 

The same ones that had hidden spy cameras in private rooms to film innocent girls naked? The ones that bullied homeless people off the side of the street?

Fuck it. 

Not letting himself overthink it, he got behind the wheel and put the car in reverse, driving out of the street before anyone could notice anything weird. Thankfully, it was an automatic model so he didn’t have to use his left foot much at all, otherwise driving would be another level of hell. 

He suspected the guy wouldn’t be at the hotel for long, estimating his visit for 2-3 hours before he would come out asking for his car back, so Hyunjin decided to drive the car out of Busan, putting as much distance between himself and the city as he possibly could manage in the few hours before he had to ditch the car. 

The authorities had probably gotten a vague description of him from the people at the gate. They would easily be able to trace his steps into the city and connect him to the disappearance of the car within hours so he didn’t have long. He just hoped he could find himself in a better situation than the one he was in at the moment. He still didn’t know where he was going. All he knew was that he needed to get far away from that forest. 

Two hours later, he found himself hanging onto the door handle as he wrenched his guts out, haphazardly parked on the side of the road, cars rushing passed him.

He couldn’t tell if the nausea and vomiting were because of his anxiety or some other internal problem.

When he finally managed to pull himself out of it, he buried his head in his arms on the wheel, trying to breathe as softly as he could- because big breaths hurt- and think for a second, set some priorities.

He needed painkillers. More than anything else. He couldn’t go on any longer just ignoring the pain shooting up his body whenever the jacket moved slightly or he breathed too hard. He needed an ice pack. He needed food and water. He had been driving for the last two hours lightheaded so he also needed to lie down… or at least something sweet. 

He needed sleep as well, but he couldn’t afford that. 

Sluggishly picking up his head to check the dashboard and the middle compartment, he breathed a sigh of relief when he found some notes jammed into the cupholders, leaning his head back on the steering wheel. 

He needed to make a quick stop in the next city on his way. 

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

He had thanked his lucky stars when he’d spotted the rest area road sign just twenty minutes back on the road.

The gas station and the little supermarket connected to it looked completely empty save for the one employee sitting behind the counter who didn’t look up from his phone even when the overhead bells rang as Hyunjin opened the door.

He was in and out of there in less than five minutes, grabbing one of the tiny (probably expired from the thick layer of dust) first-aid kits he found in the last isle, only having a minor panic attack when he realised he had no idea how the currency worked in the Republic of South Korea.

He was proud of himself for handling it so effortlessly and managing to push all the questions and doubts away until he was alone in the car again. 

It also helped that the cashier didn’t give a fuck about what he was doing and didn’t spare him a second glance the entire time he was ringing him up.  

Twenty minutes and some (probably way more than advised) gulps of liquid Novaminsulfon later, the entire car stunk of antiseptic and he couldn’t get the putrid, bitter taste of the painkiller off his tongue.

He cursed as he poured the povidone-iodine on his arm, knuckles whitening with his tightening grip on the wheel. After cleaning up the cut with the last of the cotton pad, he threw it with the rest on the pile that had accumulated on the passenger seat with an exhale and slumped back in his seat in exhaustion, whining internally when his muscles didn’t relax the slightest bit like he’d imagined they would after he was finally done. 

You need to lie down and sleep you fucking idiot, Yugyeom’s voice rang in his head and he mentally slapped himself for allowing it to happen. He couldn’t keep allowing them to run so freely on his mind when he was barely keeping his anxiety, worry and guilt under control.  

Focus Hyunjin. Stick to the plan. 

Ditch the car somewhere in Incheon, take a bus to Seoul, find some kind of Church to sleep in until you find… another solution. 

Assuming Seoul even exists and Christianity is a thing here… 

He groaned. He felt what was left of his energy draining out of him just at the thought of everything, never mind-

Stop. Stop it. No more unnecessary thoughts. No more overthinking. No more. Just a blank mind. 

One step at a time.

He kept repeating it in his head like a mantra, trying to focus his eyes on something mindless and ignore the burning of his eyes until he could clear his mind and be on his way.

Even with his entire body aching, the countless open wounds still burning from the anti-septic and the headache trying to split his skull open though, he couldn’t keep his eyes open for more than a few seconds no matter how hard he tried. So he let them stay shut on his fifth failed attempt and told himself he’d just give his eyes a few minutes of rest before he had to start driving again. 

A door slamming to his left made him open them right back up though, the hair on the back of his neck standing on end. He was left in a state of shock for a moment while his brain tried to catch up, the ringing in his ear from that morning back in full force making him wince as he covered them on instinct.

His heart thumped when he saw a pink hue on the dashboard and looked up to see the sun was setting. 

The realisation that he had fallen asleep for probably more than five hours and given the police more than enough time to locate him before he could ditch the car practically had his heart lurching in his throat. 

His hands trembled as he hurriedly threw all the leftover gauze and surgical scissors to the side and restarted the car, hastily pulling out of the now dark corner of the lot. He caught a quick glance at the car that had just parked two spots away from him as he sped out of the lot, briefly making eye contact with the blue Nissan driver as he talked on his phone.

It made chills run up his spine. 

He drove as fast as he could under the speed limit, trying to forget about the unsettling feeling, only hoping that he could make it to Incheon before the police caught onto his trail when he caught a flash of blue in his rear. 

His already exhilarated heart rate stuttered and he felt cold dread pull in his stomach. 

He hesitantly changed lanes to test his theory and cursed when the navy blue Nissan moved to the same lane to hide behind the few cars between them. 

It doesn’t have to mean anything. This could just be a coincidence. It’s obviously not a police car so you don’t have anything to worry about…

…unless it’s one of the traitor’s men. 

No. There’s no way there could be any- there couldn’t be any of them here, right? He was in a parallel universe, there was no way… 

…right?

I guess there’s one way to find out…

He looked up to quickly scan the gantry, his eyes snapping to his rear again to remind himself of why he was doing this before he stepped on the gas pedal and swerved three lanes to take the exit, tires screeching as he narrowly avoided crashing into multiple cars and the guardrail, the bloody pieces of gauze and cotton pads flying all around the car. He ignored the cacophony of honks that followed his exit and focused on the curve but cursed when he saw the blue Nissan appear right behind him.

Yeah no, definitely a fucking coincidence, he heard Yugyeom remark sarcastically in his head. 

It’s ok. Whoever it is, it’s not the police, so there’s no need to panic. You can just easily lose him. 

You’re in fucking control.

He looked in his rear again to see the guy staring back at him with one hand on his wheel. His jaw clenched and he felt his grip tighten even more on the wheel. The guy was obviously a racer if he had managed to swerve his way through so many cars and lanes to get to the exit on time, but so was he. 

Game on.

With the little space left on the narrow curve beside the car in front of him, Hyunjin squeezed through, leaving the Nissan to try to do the same with a startled driver in front of him. Swerving past the rest of the cars on the interchange, he saw the guy furiously swerve around the cars between them, gradually gaining back on him. 

When he realised the intersection only led back to the opposite side of the highway he cursed his luck, contemplating if he should just forget about getting to Incheon and ditch the car somewhere on the road instead because trying to shake off this motherfucker was gonna set him back even more. 

Breathe Hyunjin. You’re. In. control. 

He accelerated again, not caring about traffic cameras snapping pictures of him at that point as he swerved between the very few cars that were on their side of the road. He chanced another look to his rear as he got ready to go for the next exit, but his view was abruptly cut off when another car swerved in his lane right on his heel. The realisation came almost instantly and he cursed himself for being so stupid.

He had been so focused on the blue Nissan he had completely disregarded all other cars on the road.

A purple Mazda (clearly another racer from the paint job) was hot on his heels. He swerved again, trying to shake it off, but it was following his car’s every minuscule movement almost as if it were physically attached to him. 

Panic started to set in at that point.

There were almost no other cars beside them on the road at that point so he couldn’t really pull a trick to distract them. The blue Nissan was darting between cars to catch up. They were probably planning to box him in. He was starting to doubt if he could lose them on the highway at that point so he had to think quickly.

The moment he saw the next exit ramp lining up, he knew what he was gonna do. 

He reached for his abandoned seatbelt and secured it in place in preparation, swerving onto the furthest lane from the exit as they neared it and very gradually slowing down as the Mazda followed. Just as they passed the exit, he chanced a glance at his rear and waited for the blue Nissan to catch up before abruptly taking his foot off the gas and sharply turning the wheel with all his might. 

The sound of screeching tires echoed through the almost empty highway, accompanied by a trail of smoke and the smell of burnt rubber. A victorious chuckle left him when the two drivers weren’t able to react as quickly and drove on, giving him an advantage. 

He didn’t waste a second, taking another sharp U-turn just as he reached the exit ramp again, wincing when the car’s tail grazed the guardrail and the abrupt movement put pressure on the gash on his ribs. 

The intersection thankfully gave him more options this time. He decided against going back on his side of the highway, instead randomly picking roads as he went, trying to lose them. The fewer cars visible on the road the better. He hadn’t spotted the racers behind him yet so he counted that as a win. He ultimately landed on a bumpy, narrow, two-way road.

He hissed when a particularly big bump jostled his bandaged waste again, making him pay better attention to avoid the next one. Either the painkiller wasn’t working or he was beyond its effects because the sheer amount he gulped down should’ve numbed his pain for the next week at least. 

Probably why you passed out in the first place…

He knew he was running on adrenaline at the moment, but he hoped the few hours of sleep he got did something at least. He wasn’t sure he was gonna get another chance to rest for the next few days… or the entire time he was stuck there really… 

It had started drizzling at some point, the pitter-patter of the raindrops making for the perfect background track to his driving in the dark, empty road. He’d only just allowed himself to breathe a sigh of relief and to believe he was out of danger when a light in the distance made him tense up again. It was pitch black at that point and the only thing lighting up the road so far had been his own headlights, so when headlights flashed once; twice, three times, he knew something was going on. 

When he saw someone respond from behind him, he glanced at his rearview mirror to be blinded by another car’s high-beam headlights. The panic was back at full force, this time making him grip the wheel so tightly his fingernails probably left crescents on the leather. 

He could hear the roar of the engines behind him, the screeching of tires as the two cars gave chase, quickly closing in on him. They just couldn’t leave him alone, could they…

He briefly contemplated veering off road onto the unpaved ground, but before he could even think it through, the Mazda was pulling up beside him, blocking the open side of the road and boxing him against the guardrail with the blue Nissan behind him. 

Huh… guess they learned their lesson this time… He thought bitterly, glaring daggers at the two people in the Mazda beside him. A quick look ahead confirmed his suspicion that the other car was also with them because it had parked in the middle of the road, blocking both sides.

His heart sank to the bottom of his stomach when he realised they’d blocked all his escape routes. He had no choice but to stop the car. He took a shuddering breath, bracing himself for the worst. He was surprisingly calmer than he thought he would be surrounded by three cars with no escape route in a foreign universe.

Who knew? Maybe this was all a misunderstanding? They hadn’t tried to bump him or even gotten close enough to do any damage to the car, maybe they just wanted to best him? 

Your attempts at optimism are failing so miserably not even your happy-go-lucky Bam hyung would believe them, Yugyeom mocked in the back of his head. 

His jaw clenched as he saw the black car’s driver step out of his car as Hyunjin came to a stop a good ten meters away from him. He glanced to his side to see the people in the purple Mazda shifting their gazes between him and the driver, but surprisingly not getting out of their car. A quick glance to his rear proved the same for the blue Nissan. 

He focused his sight back on the Dodge Charger’s driver who was now slowly approaching his car. Hyunjin didn’t know who they were or what the hell they wanted from him, but he knew he sure as hell didn’t wanna find out. Without breaking his focused glare on the man, he unclasped his seatbelt and reached into the pocket of the red parka where he had shoved the gun earlier.

He knew Youngjae had already loaded the gun so he just clutched it in his hand and prepared himself, hoping the guy wouldn’t be so stupid as to pull anything with a gun pointed at his head and just let him go on his way. 

If these people were Lee Lim’s men, he wasn’t above shooting at them either. If push came to shove he was gonna have to protect the flute at all costs.  

From up close, the guy looked barely any older than him, approaching the car with an almost wary look? The glint of recognition that passed through the guy’s eyes when he got close enough to see him made the hairs on Hyunjin’s neck stand on end. 

His hand almost hurt with the sheer force he was clutching the handle of the gun.

The guy looked as if he had seen a ghost, hesitantly coming up to knock on his window and ask him to roll it down. Hyunjin took a second to weigh his options, not breaking the eye contact even for a second. He rolled the window down halfway, waiting for the guy to start talking.

He watched as the guy nervously shook the rain drizzles off his dishevelled hair and opened his mouth just to close it shut a second later. The guys’ eyes had broken the eye contact and zeroed in on something behind him. Hyunjin wanted so badly to turn his head and see what the guy was staring at, but he couldn’t let himself be vulnerable for even a second. 

“You’re hurt.” The guy finally concluded with an exhale, almost as if he was talking to himself, his eyes flitting back to him, this time almost filled completely to the brim with- was that worry?

Hyunjin just stared back at him incredulously before he finally had enough. “Who the hell are you and what the fuck do you want from me?” As if snapped out of a daze, the guy shook his head slightly, his shoulders bunching up and making him look smaller than he really was.

No way this was one of Lee Lim’s men. 

“I…” He shook his head again as if to clear it, "I’m Chan. I eh-“ Hyunjin was losing his patience. 

“Why the fuck did you chase me.” Hyunjin almost ground out, feeling his cheek twitch like it always did when he was disgusted. 

“Look…” the guy looked like he couldn’t decide on what to call him, “…we needed to talk to you, we weren’t expecting you to… well, do what you did, so we had to take some other measures.. I sincerely apologise if the kids came off a little too… aggressive…” The kids?

“So what the fuck do you want?” 

The guy, or Chan, seemed to contemplate his answer for a second first before he seemed to make up his mind finally. 

“You’re hurt, your highness, let us get you some medica-“ 

It didn’t even take a second for him to draw the gun out and point it at the guy’s head.

“Woah-“ The guy immediately brought his hands up in surrender, taking a small step back. Hyunjin stared at him unblinkingly.

“How the hell do you know me.” 

“Your highness I swear I can explain, please just- put the gun down-“ A door loudly slamming shut behind him made pain shoot up his ears again and wince for a second and the next series of events happened so fast not even Hyunjin could tell how it happened. 

In the split-second he’d turned his head at the sound, the guy had knocked the gun out of his hands. The next moment, Hyunjin was kicking his door open, pushing the guy to the ground with the force and scrambling out to reach for the gun on the ground before the guy could gather his bearings. 

His outstretched arm had just grazed the gun when he felt someone jump on his back, making him lose his footing and crumble to the ground on his hands and knees, putting so much pressure on his left ankle he felt all his years of dance training going up in flames right in front of his eyes. He whimpered, feeling his wounds scream in pain as he angrily shrugged the motherfucker off his back, pulling him off with his hands when the guy’s grip on his jacket wouldn’t let up. 

Next thing he knew his back was hitting the ground, head smacking against the concrete and a fist repeatedly colliding with his face. 

There was a lot of shouting, but Hyunjin couldn’t make out any words past the ringing in his ears, black spots already starting to appear in his vision as he took hit after hit. There was a moment of reprieve and he realized it was probably him just going numb before he passed out. He briefly registered a rough, panicked pair of hands tangling in his hair before the darkness finally consumed him. 

———————————————————————————————————————————----------------------

“Hyung stop!” “It’s fine! He’s passed out!”

He got to Chan just as he was about to get up, grabbing his shoulders to scan him for injuries before his hands were hastily shoved away and the older was stumbling to get to Minho who was still going at the kid.

“Stop! Minho stop it! Get off of him!” 

He stood up to support Chan from the back before he could lose his footing as the older dragged Minho off the now lax body under him with the help of Felix and Jisung. Minho angrily shrugged their hands off his shoulders and stalked off after a few reassurances from Jisung, making room for Chan who was on the kid not a second later, cradling his head in his hands tenderly and calling for Felix to help him keep his head and neck stabilised as he examined him.

Jisung’s headlights put every single raindrop on the spot as they splashed on the kid’s face, washing away the blood. Changbin sighed in relief when he saw the kid’s breaths, albeit weak, coming out in small puffs in the chilly air, highlighted like smoke in front of the blinding lights. He was breathing. He was alive.

His eyes briefly caught a glance of the gun somewhere behind Felix’s feet and his chest suddenly tightened. He frantically turned to Chan, crawling closer to him as his lungs filled with air again. 

He reached for the older’s shoulder and head to steady him so he could take a better look at the back of his head where he’d hit the ground, but the older shrugged him off again, movements curt as he went back to examining the kid’s head. “I’m fine Bin.” God, Changbin wanted to pull his own hair out, smash an entire china set and hide under his covers all at the same time.

This is not the fucking time! Get yourself back together Seo Changbin!

He had to shake himself out of whatever stupor he was going into before he couldn’t take himself out of it anymore. He focused his eyes back on Chan. 

The only other time Changbin had seen the older so hyper-focused on a task was when Jisung had come back home bleeding and on the brink of passing out. It was so bad, he wouldn’t even answer anyone calling out his name. His hands were trembling as they pulled the kid’s shirt up and examined his abdomen. Changbin sucked in a breath. 

The kid was littered with cuts and bruises, clumsily bandaged in some places and completely left naked in others. Chan quickly pulled his shirt back down with a curse, looking around for a second before his eyes landed on a scarf falling halfway out of the kids' parka jacket. He reached over to pull it out and Changbin, finally pulling himself together, tugged the rest of it out to help.

Something fell out of the scarf when he passed it over, he didn’t even have time to see what it was before Chan was snatching it off the wet asphalt. The older’s breath visibly hitched staring at the object with horror in his eyes. Changbin almost thought he was about to start hyperventilating and he didn’t know what to do. So many out-of-order things had happened in the past hour that Changbin, the token calm and collected person in their group, was overwhelmed. He didn’t know where to give his attention, where to even start. 

The well-being of his hyungs and the kids? Chan’s extremely worrying behaviour? or the boy lying half-dead on the ground who had pulled out a gun on his hyung? 

What the hell had they gotten themselves into?

Changbin snapped out of his daze when Chan abruptly attempted to pick the kid up. He was on his side in less than a second, pushing him back with a strong grip on his shoulder and a disapproving glare as he picked him up himself, Felix holding the kid's head steady. 

The older didn’t look happy about it but surprisingly didn’t protest it, shakily getting up and leading them to his own car. He opened the door for Felix to get in first. Changbin eased the kid down on the backseat after him, only closing the door on them when he was sure the kid was really unconscious. Chan had already gotten in the driver's seat, fumbling with his phone, probably pulling up the quickest route to the nearest hospital. 

Changbin looked around for Jisung, finding him buried in Minho’s neck leaning against his car’s hood. Guilt surged through him when he realised he hadn’t checked up on how they were doing this entire time. He had already taken two steps in their direction when he heard Chan’s voice calling for him from the car, all serious and tense, almost making the hairs on the back of his head stand on end. 

“Binnie,” when the older was sure he had his attention he continued, “I need you to do something for me, I need you to go to the Porsche and wipe it clean of everything. Blood, fingerprints, anything you can find that would signify a person drove it in the last 6 months. Just leave it exactly where it is right now after you’re done. I’m gonna need someone in the back while I drive him to the hospital, so I’m gonna have to take Lix with me. I’ll send him home with my car the moment we get there. Tell Jisung to take Minho straight home, there’s gonna be absolutely no racing tonight an-“ Changbin cut him off before he could ramble off, walking back towards the car.

“Hyung slow down a minute-“

“Changbin I need to-“

“You need to calm down and listen to me.” He was surprised by the conviction in his own voice. “There is no way in hell I’m letting you drive anywhere with a concussion-“

“-I don’t have a concussion-“

“Jury’s still out if you’ve even recovered from your last one yet, and with the hit you just took, yeah, no, over my dead body.”

“I told you never to use that language Bin-“ he ignored the deep frown on his hyungs face, hoping the tone he’d detected in the older’s voice was reluctant acceptance. 

“I’m a faster driver than Lix, so you two…” he pointed between Chan and Felix, “are gonna switch places and I’m gonna take you to the hospital,” he grabbed the older’s forearm, slowly coaxing him to step out of the car and was, to his complete surprise, only met with minimal protest before the older seemed to steel himself and give in with an exhausted sigh. 

Changbin didn’t know if the older was too exhausted to argue back or if he knew that he was right and was choosing his own health over his stubborn tendencies for the first time in… ever, but Changbin wasn’t gonna look a gift horse in its mouth.

When they got to Felix’s side of the car and opened the door, Changbin was hit by guilt a thousand times harder this time, seeing his boyfriend’s glassed over worried eyes going back and forth between him and Chan. “Lixie baby, can you clean up the kids' car like hyung asked and take my car back home?” 

“But hyung, I wanna-“ “I promise I’ll make sure Channie is okay baby. You don’t need to worry. I’ll call you the moment we find out anything hmm?”

Felix nodded meekly, movements hesitant and unsure as he switched places with Chan who had quietly accepted his fate. He ran around the car to get to the passenger seat before he remembered something, turning around to call out to Felix.  

“And baby tell Su-“ he was abruptly cut off by a peck, his shock melting to a fond smile when he saw Felix’ comforting eyes staring back at him, a silent reassurance that everything was gonna be okay. “I will! Just go!”

That little reassurance from Felix eased his mind enough that he could focus on the simple task of getting them to the main road and to the hospital. The sound of the heating mixed with the pitter-patter of rain hitting the car’s hood was the only thing filling up the silence that had taken over the moment he’d started driving. Changbin was biting his own cheeks to keep his mouth shut. There were so many questions he wanted to ask, so many things he needed to know. He told himself he would get to interrogate Chan after he’d made sure the older was gonna be okay. 

That was until the older told him to follow his phone’s navigation and take them to the YulJe hospital in Seoul instead of the one they were literally 10 minutes away from.  

He really couldn’t keep silent after that. 

“Hyung, I can get us to Chung-Ang in under 10 minu-“     “I’m taking him to Yullie hyung.”

“But-“            “Changbin would you please just do as I say?!” 

He went completely silent after that, a thousand thoughts running through his mind as he missed the exit he’d been about to take and kept driving them to Seoul. Every time he looked back at Chan through the rearview mirror, more questions sprung up. The older looked paler than usual, breaths shallow and quiet as he kept his head down. At first glance, anyone would think he was just focused on keeping the kids head in the right position, but Changbin knew him a lot better than that. 

His expression spoke of a thousand emotions. He thought the hooded eyes were only because the older was tired and his head probably hurt like a bitch from the hit he took, but the locked and twitching jaw along with his earlier outburst were enough indicators of his frustration and anger, although Changbin couldn’t guess where it was coming from. It was clear the older had been trying to hold himself back just like him, but Changbin was apparently just a tiny bit more patient than him, because five minutes into the absolute silence that had taken over the car, Changbin saw the older move in his periphery and braced himself. 

Here we go, he thought. 

It took a while; through the rearview mirror, he kept seeing the older’s jaw moving as if he was about to say something and clenching shut again. A minute or two later, he finally got it out and Changbin almost wished he hadn’t. 

“You shouldn’t have gotten out of the car…” 

Changbin stopped breathing for a second. He couldn’t believe his own ears. He waited for the older to elaborate, correct himself, disbelieving as he briefly caught the older’s gaze in the rearview mirror and he was stubbornly glaring out the window. What he said made him angry on so many levels that he knew they couldn’t avoid a fight anymore.

“He pulled out a gun on you.” He finally said incredulously, his brain not able to come up with anything better as he repeated Chan’s words in his head again to make sure he’d really heard him correctly. 

“I told you, to stay in your car. The kids wouldn’t have gotten out if you hadn’t.” Chan accused. Changbin couldn’t stop himself from taking a short glance back at the older to confirm it was really him. He had no idea how to deal with this version of Chan. He’d never seen the older be so unreasonable. It was so comically unlike him that Changbin had to take a second and wonder if the hit he’d taken had completely knocked the sense out of his brain.

“Are you hearing yourself right now?” 

“Bin-“

“He pulled out a gun on you!”

“He wasn’t going to shoot me.” 

“A gun, Chan.” He couldn’t bother with honorifics when the older was acting like an unreasonable child. It literally felt like they had switched roles. 

“I was handling it. You shouldn’t have gotten involved.” The spark of frustration in the older’s tone made Changbin’s own anger at Chan come to a boil. 

“You would’ve been dead if I hadn’t intervened-"

“He wouldn’t have shot me!”

“How the hell could you know that?!” 

“Because I do!” 

Changbin’s bitter chuckle echoed, chilling the air around them, “…because you do…”, he repeated with resignation, trying to catch the other’s eyes in the mirror, but the older was now actively avoiding looking at him, “…because you know him…”

He hadn’t wanted to believe the older could so easily lie to him and Felix; Minho and Jisung, the older’s little brother by anything but blood be damned, but the evidence was way too clear for him to keep denying it. 

The way the older had so abruptly changed course and asked them to change their route to look for a red Porsche on the highway out of nowhere, knowing full well they’d be missing the S.C. opening night and probably also losing a bunch of points and advantages so early in the season. The way he had kept asking them not to be too aggressive as they trailed the kid. The way he’d told them to stay back in their cars while he talked to him, how he’d pushed Changbin away to get Minho off the kid, how he’d agreed so easily to be the one in the backseat holding him as Changbin drove them to the hospital and all the tender touches and concerned gazes from then on… Chan didn’t just know the kid, he cared about him. Whoever he was.

And he had lied about it. 

“I… don’t, Bin… I just-”

“You can bullshit yourself as much as you want hyung, but you’re not gonna bullshit me."

Chan went silent after that. A thousand emotions were visible on his face, most notably guilt. Maybe this had been something the older had needed, to sort out his own feelings, an outlet for his frustration and irrational anger before he could let himself feel all the other ugly emotions hidden behind the heavy mask of the rational, dependable leader he always strived to be. 

Changbin slumped back in his seat, wishing he hadn’t been behind the wheel at that moment and didn’t have the added on stress of having to get them to a hospital quickly as he tried to sort out his own emotions. Chan didn’t need someone lecturing him at that moment. Changbin knew better than anyone how the older tended to internalise guilt and let it rust and stain everything else in his head. He needed to gently get him out of that mindset before the older drowned himself in it. 

“You know hyung,” he waited until he got the older’s attention on him, making quick eye contact before he had to look at the road again, “I’m all for taking in a new stray, but this one’s a bit too rabid for our bunch don’t you think?” He huffed a chuckle at the end, hoping the light tone and slight jab at the older’s well-known saviour complex would pull Chan out of his head, although he regretted the last part a bit as it was already coming out. Residual anger still lingering…

“…he’s not… he won’t be staying with us…” he heard him gulp and take in a breath before he continued, ”…Bin I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to lie, I just-“ the older seemed to be struggling with himself as he tried to voice out his thoughts. Changbin couldn’t stop himself from asking no matter how hard he tried.

“Who is he hyung.” He kept his voice gentle on purpose so the older wouldn’t think he was trying to force the information out, but made sure the older knew he wanted an honest answer. 

“…I used to know him when we were children before… he’s-“ he sighed before he continued again, “I haven’t seen him in over ten years; he doesn’t remember me,” the last part was so quiet Changbin wouldn’t have heard him if he hadn’t been listening. The older was vacantly staring at the passenger seat again, locked back in the depth of his thoughts. 

Changbin huffed out a breath through his nose, focusing all his attention on the road as he exhilarated even more and swerved around some cars blocking the fast line. 

———————————————————————————————————————————

“What the hell, Chan?” He hung up the phone as he saw the younger’s signature car pulling up to the ER entrance. The backseat door opened just as he rolled the foldable ER bed to a stop in front of it, Chan holding someone’s head steady as he tried to get out, “Is it Sungie? Why the hell did you bring him all the way here? Wasn’t Kihyunie hyung’s team at the circuit tonight?” 

“Hyung I need your help-“ “Chan get off, let me pick him up,”

“Holy shit.” His breath caught in his lungs when he finally got a glimpse of the face of the limp body being pulled out of the car. 

Holy fucking shit.

He only remembered he had to breathe when Chan’s hunched shoulders blocked his view of the body and he was finally forced to look away. His gaze immediately gravitated to the younger’s equally panicked and worried eyes staring back at him, silently reminding him of where they were and who was around them which only confirmed his suspicions. 

He only had a second more to try to convey what the actual fucking hell through their eye contact before Changbin was slamming the door shut with his leg and carrying him to the stretcher. He snapped out of his daze and quickly moved over to help Changbin lay him on the bed carefully, the two words Oh God going on a never-ending loop in his head as they started rolling the stretcher towards the sliding doors of the ER and he started checking him over with shaky hands. 

“How long has he been unconscious?” He asked as he checked the younger’s pupils, thanking God that the younger was at least fine on that front for now.

“About 20 minutes, maybe a little more, he took multiple blows to the head, I don’t know what happened before we got to him, but he also has a ton of injuries all over his body. There is a big gash going from his shoulder to his side almost to his ribs, I think he cleaned them up with antiseptic, but the wounds are still open-“

Chan’s voice faded away, his mind racing a mile a minute, heart almost lurching out of his chest with every new injury he discovered on the boy’s body. His head was bleeding alarmingly, bruises covered his entire abdominal area accompanied by a thousand cuts, big and small, littered all over, his left ankle looked so swollen and red it almost looked like it was gonna blow up… 

Severe head trauma, possible skull fracture, broken ribs causing internal bleeding, possible infection, definite sprayed ankle bordering on broken, Oh God-

“Hyung!” He abruptly turned his head in Chan’s direction, only now noticing how fast he was panting, “We need a private room.”

Shit. 

If he really was who Yul thought he was, he didn’t have an identity here. No identification, no medical record or insurance. Yul didn’t know how he’d gotten here, but if he knew one thing for sure, it was that Lee Lim’s men knew. For all he knew, they’d already caught up to him, it would explain his fucked up condition. If they caught a whiff of him staying in Seoul, there was no guarantee that they could keep the boy safe. 

They’d have to keep this as quiet as possible. He was gonna owe a lot of people favours.

He took in the busy ER around him, for the first and probably last time in his entire life thanking God that the doctors on call were all busy and preoccupied. No one spared them a second glance as he quickly directed them towards a patient transport elevator and pressed the button to the VIP floor, incessantly pushing the close door button. 

He brought out his flashlight pen to check the younger’s pupils again, letting himself breathe a little easier when they weren’t dilated. He had to grip the stretcher’s handles to stop his hands from trembling, thoughts a jumbled mess as his eyes automatically fixed on the patient’s face again. 

The face that belonged to the next monarch of his country. Oh God-

“Hyung, are you okay?” Changbin’s voice broke through his stupor, reminding him of where they were and who he was. 

He never thought he’d have to treat Hwang Hyunjin as his patient when he first thought of becoming a doctor. Now, he wished he’d chosen business school instead. The pressure of having the fate of an entire nation in his hands was way too fucking much. 

“Hyung?” Get your fucking self together Seo Yul!

He took a deep breath, leaning back from the stretcher and running an unsteady hand through his hair. He tried to ignore his heart that was almost beating out of his chest and silence the millions of worst-case scenarios his brain was conjuring in order to be able to think.

He needed to take a CT scan of his head and abdomen stat, he also needed an IV line and a neck brace, maybe a brace for his ankle too, his pupils hadn’t gotten any wider, so probably no life-threatening head injury, but he still needed someone from NS to look him over, he could go into surgery if the internal bleeding was too bad, but he needed a team.

Minhyuk and Kihyun hyung were at the S.C. so they were out of the picture, he knew Jae-Wook wasn’t on-call that night, but he’d come back if he called him, he’d have to ask Sanha to bring some supplies up from the ER, the VIP wards wouldn’t have everything he needed-

His eyes snapped open immediately when he realised they were going to the wrong floor, thanking God when he saw they hadn’t passed it yet, pressing down on the 7th floor’s button for a few seconds before he shakily took his phone out and scrolled through his contacts to call Jae-Wook.

He spotted Chan moving in his periphery and already knew what was coming. Too bad they didn’t have another option. The younger would have to understand. It was either this or- he didn’t even wanna think of that scenario.  

“Hyung what are you-“ 

“Shush Chan-ah-“

“Hyung, we can’t, you know we can’t-“

“I can’t do this alone!” He sent a withering glare at his dongsaeng who flinched back from the tone of his voice like a kicked puppy. He brought the phone back to his ear just when the ringing finally stopped and the elevator doors slid open. 

-———————————————————————————————————————————

The bright sun rays penetrated through his eyelids, making him twitch in discomfort. He groaned as he slowly regained consciousness, a sharp pain shooting through his head and neck when he tried to turn his head away from the offending light. 

He squinted as he slowly opened his eyes, blinking a few times to adjust his eyes to the daylight. When he tried to lift his arm to shield his face from the sunlight, he found it to be heavy, with a strange weight attached to it. 

Frowning, he squinted down at it. His vision was still blurry, but he could still recognise the IV catheter attached to his hand. 

There was a moment of confusion before everything came back to him like a tidal wave. 

Panic and fear rushed through him as the memories of the past two days flooded his mind. 

His gaze moved to the rest of his body, pulse quickening with every new bandage he found. A cast was wrapped around his right wrist, his sprained ankle was also bandaged, elevated on a couple pillows with an ice pack on it, he could feel wires attached to his arms, legs and chest, finally starting to hear the beeping of the machines coming from beside the bed. 

He took a deep breath and tried to lift his head to take a look around the room, but it felt like it weighed a ton and he let it fall back on the pillow. He regretted the sudden movement immediately when his head started to throb.

What the fuck had happened after he’d passed out. 

He only noticed he was starting to hyperventilate when the oxygen mask that he hadn’t noticed before started fogging up. 

They had known exactly who he was. 

The guy had called him your highness. 

They had chased him down, cornered him and beaten him up and then, what? Brought him to a fucking hospital?

There was no doubt that they were with Lee Lim and if they were-

Oh God, the flute! 

The rapid beating of his heart along with the loud beeping of the ECG machine and all the cords connected to him felt suffocating. He abruptly ripped the needles out of his arm, wincing into a sitting position as the IV drip started soaking the bed. There was a moment where the nausea and dizziness was so bad he had to cling onto the bedrails for support, but the panic overcame the physical discomfort and he started to slowly pull his leg down from the pillows, whimpering as it brushed against the side of the bed too harshly. 

He had to get the fuck out of there. 

He’d figure something out once he was out of the hospital and somewhere the traitor’s men couldn’t find him, but he didn’t have time to panic about the flute or the fact that he’d probably lost his only chance to go back to- 

No. Focus.

His knees buckled under him the moment he tried to stand up. If it hadn't been for the grip he had kept on the bedrail he would’ve been sprawled on the floor by now. Taking a second to collect his bearings, he forced himself to take a few deep breaths, looking around the room again. His vision had mostly cleared up and he could finally take in his surroundings. 

He was in a private hospital room. From the looks of the rich wooden detailing of the walls and the spacious, sectioned-off sitting area and kitchenette, he was definitely in the VIP section. He wondered how the hell he had ended up there, but didn’t let himself dwell on it. With an immense effort he finally managed to pull himself off the ground, keeping all his weight on his right leg and leaning towards the wall as he wobbled to the long closet a few feet away from the bed. 

He almost wanted to cry in relief when he saw his hyung’s black scarf and the red parka jacket hanging in the closet. He reached for the jacket’s pockets immediately, stupidly hoping they had just missed the small wooden piece, but they were empty just as he had feared. The rest of his clothes weren’t there, but this was already way more than he had been expecting. He shakily pulled off the scarf, trying not to think of the flute as he pulled the black cashmere around his neck. He almost hesitated with the jacket, doubting he’d go unnoticed in the hospital corridors with a huge red parka jacket on, but pulled it on at the end. He realised he needed something to cover the hospital gown if he didn’t want to look like a deranged insane asylum escapee on the street.

Limping his way to the door, he hung onto the backrest of the big couch in the sitting area for a second, taking note of the messy state of the long coffee table and rumpled blanket on the couch. It looked like someone had been sleeping there. There were empty ramen cups and a few food containers spread on the table along with a phone.

Hyunjin felt faint. 

Someone had been keeping an eye on him the entire time he’d been there. 

He rushed the rest of the way to the door, ignoring the blinding pain shooting through his body whenever his body weight shifted onto his left leg. Just as he was reaching out to take the door handle, the door was pushed open and he froze. 

The boy who had opened the door hadn’t been looking forward, so he didn’t take notice of him immediately, but the other guy behind him had instantly zeroed in on him, big doe eyes staring back at him in shock. 

He saw the first boy’s head turn in his periphery, but he couldn’t break eye contact with the second boy for some reason, frozen still in his spot. 

“Uhhhh Channie hyung!?”

Hyunjin’s heart lurched in his throat for the 100th time that day.