Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Will's imagination had often made life difficult for him. Besides the fact that he had nightmares all the time, especially after Jack's particularly dark cases, the reality around him also occasionally flickered with dark illusions of his subconscious. He saw ghost-like silhouettes in windows that were really just his psyche's way of guiding him on the right path in an ongoing investigation; he saw himself in the murderer's shoes, with a bloody knife in his hand standing over the body, when actually he was just cleaning fish for dinner. Sometimes he would have panic attacks after such outbursts, and if he was home at the time, Matthew would usually come to his rescue, calmly taking the knife from his hands to continue cooking on his own while Will stepped away, nervously pouring himself a glass of water, and distracting him with conversation, very easily and skillfully pretending that nothing had happened. It helped Graham, a lot. He felt grateful, and after a while he'd come over to Brown, hugging him from behind and helping him get the fish right while Matthew just smiled slightly, feeling the pleasant warmth of the man behind him.

They had moved in together not too long ago, but the young man already felt at home. They had only been dating for a few months before that, and part of Will had felt like they were in too much of a hurry then, but at some point he just couldn't bring himself to chase Matthew home anymore, seeing how loved he was by the dogs and how they didn't want to let him go anywhere. Besides, he couldn't ignore the way Brown's stuff was slowly being added to his house, from the toothbrush and deodorant in the bathroom to the science fiction that lay in an uneven pile on the living room table; he already had his own mug with the stupid inscription on it, and there were always two whiskey glasses on the kitchen shelf, not just one like before. So the fact of the move didn't change much, except that Will had to clear out a couple of shelves in the closet for his clothes and a few hangers, which mostly held Matthew's medical suits and lab coats. The only argument against the whole moving adventure was the long drive to work, but he didn't care much about that - he always woke up early anyway and liked to drive, so he didn't see it as a problem. Waking up in the same bed with Will seven days a week was worth the extra hour it took to get to the hospital, and he wouldn't trade it for anything else in the world.

They'd met by chance, during one of the investigations. Graham had had to visit the Baltimore State Hospital for the Criminally Insane when one of its patients, declaring himself the Chesapeake Ripper in captivity, had murdered a nurse. Will had been sick at the time and didn't know it yet, and after another violent fantasy he suddenly found himself in an empty hospital hallway, with no idea how he'd gotten there. Breathing heavily, he looked around in panic as he suddenly heard a calm voice and saw an orderly standing lazily leaning against the wall, twirling a bunch of keys around his fingers. He had neatly styled dark hair and attentive light green eyes, which he kept fixed on Graham like an eagle watching its prey.

"Are you lost, Mr. Graham?" Matthew asked then, and Will swallowed, looking away and nodding nervously, feeling terribly awkward and slightly scared. How had he managed to get lost in the corridors of a mental hospital? And how long had it been since this man had stood a few meters away from him, looking at him so predatorily? Graham was getting nervous. Brown, however, didn't seem in any way surprised by the profiler's behavior then, and only grinned as he stepped away from the wall, approaching him. "Let me help you find your way out," he suggested, actually putting the idea into action immediately, turning Will in the right direction with a cautious hint of a touch and placing his hand barely perceptibly on his lower back, urging him to walk alongside with him. Graham felt compelled to obey and didn't even pull away, though, as he realized thinking about it afterward, he actually could have and should have done that. He felt like a patient at that moment, which, given his hallucinations and sleepwalking, was not too far from the likely scenario of his upcoming future, so he did not resist the nurse who was confidently controlling all his movements in those dark hospital's corridors.

As they reached the turn into the wing Will already knew, Matthew stopped, turning to face the man. He smirked, then slipped a note into his jacket pocket, causing Graham to blink in shocked incomprehension. The young man smoothed his chest, as if correcting a non-existent crease, and walked away with a wink, twirling a bunch of keys around his finger, leaving Will to deal with his accelerated heartbeat on his own.

Will was sure then that the orderly had left him his number in the note, and thinking about it made him a little nervous, since he'd never been in a situation like this before. He wasn't going to call him or go out with him in any way, not feeling in the right state of mind for even a one-night stand, but as he sat in the car he decided to pull the note out of his pocket after all and was surprised to find it didn't have an invitation to have dinner or something like that on it, as he had expected, but the words that Dr. Chilton had been using unorthodox therapies on the self-proclaimed Ripper for quite some time, and that the orderly had evidence of this, which he was not prepared to give to the FBI for fear of losing his job. The number does turn up on the note after all, but on the other side, yet from the context Will guessed that it wasn't an offer of a date, which made him simultaneously exhale with relief and quite a bit upset. He certainly wasn't going to have any sort of affair, of course, but it would be nice to be in the position of being the person someone was interested in at least once in his life.

He texted Matthew, clarifying the details of the information he'd gotten from the orderly, and eventually he invited Will to talk to him in person tonight at the bar. Graham wanted to refuse, not really considering it that important to get an opportunity to be convinced of the young man's words, but for some reason he found himself at one of the bar tables with a glass of whiskey in front of him at nine o'clock. Matthew showed up a little later, flashing him a smug grin that made something happen in Will's solar plexus area, and easily lowered himself onto the couch across from the man. His hair was a bigger mess than it had been at work, and instead of hospital clothes, he was wearing the most casual one - a T-shirt with some band's album cover print, black jeans, and a leather jacket. His gaze was still all-consuming, leaving no chance for escape, and Graham suddenly realized that he really was interested in him, and that Matthew was just using the information (even if truthful one) about the investigation as an excuse to get to know him better. This realization suddenly didn't piss him off, and he just tilted his head to the side in interest, looking at the young man studying him as he fervently told him about the sins of his superiors.

He still didn't quite understand how he'd ended up fucking him in the bar's relatively clean restroom about half an hour later, and preferred to justify it to himself with encephalitis, which he didn't start treating until a month later. In fact, though, he probably just liked to feel that kind of attention on himself for a change, so different from the kind of that pesky psychiatrists that wanted to open up his skull and take a closer look at the parts of his brain responsible for empathy and imagination; this new kind of attention, when one saw him as the object of his desire, of his passion, was new and strangely attractive, pushing him to do things he hadn't done even when he was a student.

Even though he was sure it was just a one-night stand, some form of entertainment and recreation for both of them, he still wasn't sorry he'd let it happen. Matthew had been hot and passionate, first kissing his neck and caressing his body with his hands, then kneeling in front of him, sucking him off with astounding dedication in the small bathroom stall, colliding glances with Will, bringing him to orgasm almost embarrassingly fast. Graham returned the favor by reaching into his underwear with the palm of his hand, allowing the young man to nibble his skin in oblivion and breathe heavily in his ear, and then Brown pulled a pack of wet wipes from his pocket and wiped the remnants of semen off both of them, careful and considerate, something Will hadn't exactly expected given the circumstances. They left the stall afterward and Matthew washed his face, running a damp palm through his hair, colliding his eyes in the reflection with Will standing behind him, giving him a wink. Graham looked almost unfazed by what had happened, not yet fully realizing everything, and reacted calmly even as Matthew came quite close to him again and ran a wet thumb over his lips, wiping away the drops of blood left behind from the accidental bite. "Well… I hope I was helpful, Mr. Graham" he muttered with a smirk before walking away nonetheless, leaving Will alone and letting him exhale, covering his eyes, slowly realizing the moment that had just happened.

Will had thought that they wouldn't contact or see each other again, believing the nature of their connection to be spontaneous and one-off, however a week later he received a message, completely simple and uncomplicated, consisting of a direct offer to meet again. Graham, who had been visited by dreams involving Brown for the past couple of nights, couldn't bring himself to refuse, no matter how embarrassed he felt. It made him feel like a rebellious teenager, even though he was already in his thirties, and adrenaline was bubbling in his blood with passion. Matthew had suggested they meet at the club, and Will, feeling panicked at the mere thought of going to such a noisy, crowded place, had pulled himself together and suggested instead that they go straight to Brown's apartment, not wasting time on useless foreplay for the sake of decorum. The young man, of course, agreed right away, but the foreplay still took some time - they talked for a while, drinking in his apartment the whiskey he had bought just for Will, learning each other's thoughts and unconsciously growing closer, before Matthew finally pressed him to the bed, undressing him in the heat of passion and showering him with millions of kisses. Graham stayed the night, and in the morning he had breakfast in bed waiting for him, which felt strange but not unpleasant, and Will caught himself thinking that he wouldn't mind at least one more repeat of everything that had happened between them that night.

They saw each other every week at Brown's apartment, but Graham's mental (and to some extent physical) condition was deteriorating, and one of those nights they never got to sex because Will had lost his memory of how he'd gotten to Matthew's apartment and what had happened in the last few hours at all; Brown was concerned about his condition, and after learning more about his symptoms, he took the car keys and drove Will straight to the hospital, not accepting any objections. At first the man was furious, as if his opinion in regard to his own health was being disregarded, but his anger subsided when he heard the results of the checkup. His brain was blazing with encephalitis, and if he'd put off the scan for a few more weeks things could have gotten irreversibly worse - he was lucky that it ended up being limited to a month of treatment and a course of pills. In a way, Matthew had saved his life.

And he was there for Will when he was sick, which was a bit of a surprise to Graham. The young man often came to visit him in the hospital, bringing flowers each time, something none of Graham's few other visitors had thought to do. He would sit by his bedside for hours until a nurse kicked him out, informing him that visiting hours were over. Will had been mostly silent during these times, feeling strange at the attention and care he received, but by the time he was discharged he had accepted the idea that Brown wanted to be more than just a lover to him, and even decided not to do anything to stop it. The young man's attention was pleasant, and Will, though he was not yet in love with him himself, liked to spend time with him, liked the way he looked at him and smiled at him, the way he joked and touched him, the way he worried about him and cared for him in so many ways. Liked his kisses, whether gentle or passionate, liked watching him and liked listening to him. He got to know Matthew more and more, delving into his thoughts and studying them from the inside, and Brown opened up to him from new and new sides, surprising the man and sometimes causing him strange, special feelings, dangerously bordering on the affection he had feared since his father's death. He had never allowed himself that with anyone but his dogs, but he couldn't help it when Brown came into his life. He found himself powerless against his cheerful charms of a young man in love, falling like he'd been hit right in the heart by the cupid's arrow.

They started going out a couple of times a week, sometimes to Matthew's apartment, having sex afterward in his bed or right in his kitchen where they drank coffee (Will wasn't allowed to drink alcohol during his course of medication; Brown didn't drink out of solidarity), sometimes to the park or a cafe, just talking and spending time together. Graham liked more secluded places, as he didn't like having a lot of people around, and Matthew began to take this into account to make him feel more comfortable. His efforts invariably paid off, and over time Will realized that he was really falling in love with him. There were fewer and fewer nightmares and hallucinations, the time off work allowed his psyche to replace the bleak images with more pleasant ones, and Graham began to feel much better and calmer around Brown, which is what led Will to introduce him to his dogs, beginning to gradually let the man closer into his secluded life. After a couple months, Matthew's duffel bag ended up on his bedroom floor, and the boundaries of Will's privacy expanded a bit to accommodate one more person. The dogs were thrilled. He himself had no regrets either.

Jack had recently come back to him asking for help with the investigation, and Will had to agree, even though he knew in advance of the certain consequences for his psyche. And now, even though his work on the case is over, his renewed imagination gives him a new vivid picture when he is preparing dinner. As he cuts open the fish, he sees blood gushing out of it, which makes him wince, and he accidentally runs his knife across his finger, dropping it reflexively onto the cutting board and hissing through his teeth. Matthew, who was peeling potatoes at the time, immediately looks over and, seeing the blood, instantly drops what he was doing, finding himself next to Will and taking his wounded hand. "Here, let me take a look" he says, quickly examining the cut, quite deep, but not one that would need stitches or anything like that. He turns on the water in the sink so that it pours just a bit, and skillfully helps him put his hand under the stream to rinse the cut. "Hold it like this. I'll be right back" he promises quickly, without giving Will an opportunity to say a word, and leaves for the second floor, soon coming to him with a first aid kit. He carefully takes Graham's hand again, turning off the water, and treats the wound, gently wrapping a bandage around his finger. Will feels strange, watching this silently and not paying attention to the pain at all, instead following Matthew's every confident movement, caring for him so calmly. "That's it" Matthew smiles a little and they finally collide glances, "Nurse Brown is always at your service."

Graham looks at him thoughtfully and then suddenly leans over and kisses him on the lips, his palm touching his cheek and he feels the contented smile of the slightly surprised young man, which he enjoys as he pulls away. Will smiles just a bit in return. "Thank you. Though I really could have handled it myself" he remarks for some reason, actually having absolutely nothing against Matthew's concern for him.

Brown snorts, wrapping his arms around his waist. "There's a lot of other things you can handle without my help, but what fun would that be?" the young man says, lowering his hands slightly and squeezing Will's buttocks a little with his palms, causing him to roll his eyes. Graham catches himself thinking that he wouldn't mind continuing now, but before he can hint at it in any way, Matthew sighs, pulling away and picking up the knife. "Let me finish the fish. Will you make tea in the meantime? I've been thinking about a cup all day, the conditions at work are just disgusting for a decent tea party," he changes the subject, and Will has no choice but to nod and step back to the kettle, leaving thoughts of Brown's caretaking for later. It's not until a couple of hours later when they end up in bed that he gets the chance to get what he wants, and Matthew only laughs amusedly as he touches his neck with his bandaged finger, having no idea what has caused such a mood in the usually overly tired at the weekdays Graham today.

Will eventually decides not to think about why the idea of Matthew caring for him in this way turned him on so much, and he almost succeeds, but a week later he catches the flu. He has to take a sick leave, and Brown, who has also been infected, but finds himself able to tolerate the symptoms much better than Will can with his weakened immune system after encephalitis, decides to take over his care. Having strictly forbidden him to get out of bed, Matthew does the cooking, bringing him breakfast, lunch and dinner in bed, takes care of the dogs, and, of course, supervises his medication. Several times a day he checks his temperature with the touch of his palm, sometimes giving him a thermometer, and Will, surrounded by all this attention, feels like he's being captured by some incredible spectacle. And, though at first he tries to defend his ability to cope with it all on his own, after a while even those feeble attempts to save his face disappear, and he obediently opens his mouth to take the medicine from the spoon and closes his eyes blissfully when Matthew's cool palm touches his hot forehead.

When he feels better a couple of days later, holding a cup of hot tea with honey, he realizes he's staring at Brown lying next to him, calmly reading a book. He is filled with a desire to thank his partner for all his care and effort, and after a moment's thought, he snuggles closer to him, holding him gently in his arms and hearing an approving "mhm" with a smile in return. Matthew is still looking at his book, and Will doesn't tell him to put it away, just starting to kiss his bare shoulder, covering his eyes, his hand sliding down his stomach lower, stroking his groin through the fabric of his gray sweatpants. "Someone's feeling better already, huh?" Brown remarks playfully, still looking away from the lines and with a smile turning his head slightly to look at the top of Will's head as he presses his lips to his chest. "Are you sure you don't have a fever?" he clarifies, stroking his hair, and the man moans slightly audibly, sliding his hand under his boxers to cup his palm around his cock beginning to harden. "Mmm... Will, no, you need to rest" he forces himself to take his wrist to pull his hand away from his dick, gathering his remaining patience. "Besides, I'm pretty sure you still have a fever, you’re hot. In both ways" Matthew remarks, trying to ignore the slightly annoyed sound Will makes at that. "I know. But you really need to... oh god" he sobs as Graham bites down lightly on his nipple, clearly determined to drive his man crazy. He buries his fingers in his hair, feeling himself surrendering under such pressure, not knowing how to tell Will no when he runs his freed hand under his clothes again. This time Matthew just relaxes, tucking the book aside open and biting his lower lip, feeling the growing pleasure and slight heat coming from Graham.

Feeling close to cumming soon, he makes Will roll over onto his back and kisses his neck, trying to catch his breath after losing his touch. He takes his wrist and guides Will's own hand under his underwear while whispering in his ear, "let me see how you take care of yourself." Graham gasps, obediently starting to move his hand, hearing the encouraging whisper and feeling the gentle kisses on his neck; his temperature seems to rise, he moans softly, and finally cums, throwing his head back on the pillow as Brown beside him moans too, his cum splashing onto his body. "Mhm… yeah… good boy" Matthew purrs, kissing the man's shoulder and then taking about a minute to gradually come to his senses before rising. "Now let me take care of you. In a slightly different way" he winks at him with a soft smile and then pulls out some tissues and wipes the two of them off, getting up and going into the kitchen to pour Will some water and bring him his medicine. Giving it all to him, he strokes him gently through his soaked strands, smiling faintly, and Graham naturally melts under that tenderness, not knowing why he deserves any of this.

Will spends the next few days, gradually returning to routine duties after his illness, trying to figure out what exactly was causing these intrusive thoughts in him, and the answer comes very unexpectedly when Brown returns from work without changing out of his usual uniform, and Graham has the pleasure of seeing him like this for a while before he goes to shower.

Not that Will has a fetish, no, of course not. It's just that Matthew really did look good in his medical clothes, and the sight of him somehow by itself provoked some continuing thoughts in the man's mind. His imagination vividly pictures Brown putting on some blue medical gloves, touching Will's face, neck, and in fact any place on his body, giving him goosebumps and a quickened heartbeat. Graham bites his lip, forcing himself to look away and go about his chores, but the truth is that the whole time Brown is in the shower, Will can only think of him and that damn medical coat. He can't figure out what's wrong with him, what's happened to his psyche - after all, he wasn't interested in anything like that before. He remembers his youth, medical examinations at school, but all he associates with them is a slight feeling of anxiety at having to endure such close attention from another person (and sometimes eye contact, if it was an ophthalmologist). He had never been able to escape inside himself at such times, and it put him in a mild state of panic. Still, getting that kind of scrutiny from Matthew didn't seem like anything frightening to him right now. They were very close, and Brown loved to stare at him and watch everything he did, so Will had gotten used to it. The medical context just makes it all... something special. Exciting.

It must have had something to do with caring, being the object of someone's attention, being touched as if he was some kind of training mannequin rather than a real person. Graham vividly imagines Matthew listening to his racing heartbeat through a stethoscope, or holding his face with the palm of his hand, looking into his eyes with medical attentiveness, or that latex-clad hand gripping his cock in an almost medically detached way, or those fingers penetrating him, lubricated, while Brown says something soothing ... It's breathtaking, and Will, thinking about it, accidentally drops his whiskey glass and it shatters, bringing Graham out of the illusion of his imagination. "Shit" he says under his breath, then reflexively looks toward the second floor.

"Everything okay?" Matthew asks loudly, peering out of the bathroom.

Will has only a couple moments to think about the situation, and he acts without really taking questions of common sense and morality into consideration. "Yeah! Almost. I dropped my glass and... uh, cut myself. Can you get the first aid kit?" he asks loud enough to be heard, and bends down, picking up one of the shards, clutching it in his palm for a couple moments, pressing his lips together in slight pain.

Matthew frowns confusedly, stopping by the bathroom, but then obediently goes back inside and, tossing his hair towel into the laundry basket, picks up the first aid kit from the shelf, walking with it into the living room. He's only wearing his underwear and Will's robe to keep warm, and as he enters the room, he sees Graham on the floor by the fireplace, carefully picking up shards with his bare hands to clean up before the dogs hurt themselves. "Hey, well what are you doing?" Brown asks, quickly shortening the distance, causing Will to look up confused. Matthew sighs, and then, after a moment's thought, puts the first aid kit on the floor and takes the edges of his robe with both hands so Graham can put the shards on the thick fabric and Brown can carry them safely to the trash can in the kitchen. "Be more careful. You've been a real mess lately" Brown remarks as he returns to Will still sitting by the fireplace on the floor, examining his wound thoughtfully.

When Matthew takes his hand, beginning to examine and treat the wound in his palm, Graham feels like a criminal and also an idiot - did he just hurt himself on purpose just so his boyfriend would take care of him? This might make some sense if the rest of the time Brown was cold and detached, but that's not the case at all. It's hard for Will to remember any other person in his life who has shown him such enviable consistency in their caring for him, whether through acts of service, words of encouragement, or anything else. Matthew loves him with every language of love. And he acts like a fool, as if that's not enough for him. Idiot.

"How did you even manage to cut yourself like that?" Brown asks, shaking his head as he finishes wrapping the bandage around Graham's arm, and Will shrugs. Matthew sighs, and then takes his palm with both hands and brings it closer to his face, kissing gently at the skin above the bandage, and it turns out to be his biggest mistake, because in this moment Will realizes one thing about himself: he wants more.

It becomes some sort of addiction. Some very strange obsession. Dirty secret. But along with the surreal wet dreams comes his increased clumsiness, and a couple days later Will injures his leg on a walk with the dogs just a bit, and another week later very successfully gets caught by a maniac while he's being apprehended. To his own shock, almost all he thinks about when his nose is bleeding from a punch and his shoulder hurts from a mild sprain is how Matthew will be treating his wounds a couple hours later, with his usual anxious and concerned expression on his face, asking him how much something hurts and if he can be a good boy and endure the necessary procedures. He refuses the help of the paramedics on the spot, simply getting behind the wheel and driving home.

For Brown, this actually becomes the last straw. He says nothing to Will, simply helping him with his bruises and wounds, and then also carefully kissing him and having sex with the love of his life, but spends the entire next day contemplating his next actions. He couldn't help but notice Graham's strange behavior, of course, and he found it even amusing in a way; he liked to indulge his partner, skillfully playing the unaware innocent person, waiting for Will to talk to him directly, but Will didn't seem to like talking directly - at least not about sex and his preferences in it. This was all beginning to look dangerously absurd, and Matthew was sure that Graham could have knocked out the maniac at once without risking his health - his man was strong when he wanted to be, and he also had a gun. Still, he hadn't gotten it until it was too late, and - Brown was sure - had succumbed to the maniac just to kill two birds at once: get an adrenaline boost from the pain and fight and care from his lover afterward.

Matthew sighs heavily, shaking his head as he leads another psycho from a larger cage to a smaller one to talk to a psychiatrist, and for the first time in a long time he doesn't pay the slightest bit of attention to someone else's private conversation, too immersed in constructing the plan of revelation.

Matthew mentally chuckles at the thought that for a man who, after half an hour of their first date, had calmly gone to fuck him in the bathroom, Will was just remarkably secretive about any experimentation in bed. So shy and cute, it’s just adorable. Matthew has never been in love that much.

Coming home from work, they have a quiet dinner, then Matthew showers first and, while Graham goes to the bathroom after him, begins to get ready to execute his plan. He opens the closet and pulls out one of his uniforms, putting it on rather quickly, looking in the mirror with satisfaction and smugness, and throws his stethoscope, left over from his college days, over his neck. Fixing his hair, he pocketed the sterile gloves, then pulled out and tucked on the nightstand the odorless, tasteless lube he'd bought a couple hours ago. He usually preferred something with a bright flavor, liking to try something new from time to time, but it wouldn't fit much for what he had planned for Will, so he had to give up the urge to use something from his stockpile and buy something neutral. They would definitely still have a chance to try something different later anyway.

Hearing the bathroom door open nearby, he smirks slightly, leaning his back lazily against the wall and waiting for his clumsy patient to come in. Graham walks in a few moments later, dressed in a gray t-shirt and boxers, about to read before sleep, and is somewhat confused, flinching when he sees Matthew. He blinks perplexedly a few times, indeed for a couple moments thinking he's lost his mind again and sees hallucinations, but what seemed to be an illusion of his inflamed imagination doesn't disappear, only smirks calmly, looking at him from the side with his usual lazy curiosity.

"...Matthew?" Graham frowns a little incomprehensibly, continuing to stand at the door, still holding the handle without closing it all the way.

"Hi. Did you call a doctor?" Brown asks flirtatiously with a smirk, full of smugness looking at Will who doesn't understand what's going on.

"...No?" Graham asks totally unsure, and Matthew even chuckles, finding his reaction utterly endearing.

He steps away from the wall finally, shoving his hands into the pockets of his coat. "Well, I've decided to call myself," the young man says, tilting his head to the side and raising his eyebrows innocently. "Because you've been... so clumsy lately, Mr. Graham. You've been getting into trouble now and then. If I were more suspicious, I'd think you were doing it on purpose. But, of course, you certainly wouldn't do such a stupid thing deliberately, would you?" he stops a step away from him, noticing the slight blush on Will's face and the way he's trying to figure out where to hide his gaze. His Adam's apple twitches. "That's what I was thinking. Well, why don't we do a little checkup, hm? Just to make sure everything's okay and working well" he suggests, keeping his gaze on the man's face, greedily absorbing every shadow of embarrassment and shame over the realization that he's been exposed. So charming and lost. Matthew pulls one hand out of his pocket and points his palm toward the bed. "Please, sit down. Make yourself comfortable" he asks, looking expectantly at Will, encouraging him to comply.

Graham opens his mouth to make another attempt to stop this strange theater, but looking at Matthew, he can't bring himself to do so. After all, this is what he wanted, what he's been thinking about so much and so often lately, isn’t it? So why would he turn down an opportunity like this? He should have just let himself go and play by the rules, enjoying the process.

Yeah. Easier said than done.

"O-kay," he decides nonetheless, taking a quiet exhale and licking his lips, and then, feeling shivers run down his spine at the obscurity of Brown's future plans, still makes his way to the bed and sits on the side on the edge, glancing up at his partner who smiled satisfied with his decision.

"Very good" the nurse says, walking over to the table and taking a clipboard and pen from it, looking completely natural and calm as he runs his gaze over the hand scribbled words. "I'd like to start by asking you a few questions, if you don't mind" he clicks the pen before looking up at his patient. Will looks back at him with a certain amount of criticism, but Matthew knows what he's doing - the thing is, a clipboard can lend immediate authority to anyone holding it, and he knew that Will secretly loves it when Brown plays a more dominant role in their bad. It is his guilty pleasure no one knows about, and Matthew loves the effect he can cause simply by exercising authority in their bed. "Tell me, do you smoke? Drink, maybe? Use drugs, or maybe some medication, with prescription or without one?"

Will senses the absurdity of the situation almost on a physical level, but decides to be patient, though the blush and slight accompanying heat doesn't leave his face. He looks at Brown, collected and calm, wondering when was the last time he'd actually been in a situation like this, given his current place of employment, where his duties were... well, frankly speaking, somewhat different. He handcuffed criminals and took them from one cage to another, administered injections, delivered food, set up listening devices in the date room - in short, Chilton used him as much as he could, leaving very little opportunity to apply any of the medical knowledge he'd had since college. He mentally wondered if Brown himself was aroused by such a game, and immediately gave himself the answer - of course he was. Matthew loved experimentation in bed and really liked sex, especially sex with Will. Besides, looking at his face now, he had no doubt that Brown was enjoying everything that was going on, perhaps at this point even more than Graham himself, simply because he knew what was going to happen next. He clearly has a plan, and that... encourages Will to play by his rules at the very least.

He swallows, averting his gaze, resigning himself to the show Matthew has decided to put on before getting directly to the point. "I only drink. A glass of whiskey in the evening a couple of times a week."

He hears the sound of the young man writing something in his clipboard, and it's almost comical. "Any history of recent illnesses?"

Will suppresses a chuckle. "I had encephalitis a few months ago," he replies obediently, relaxing a little, realizing it's going to be a while before Matthew gets tired of this conversation and comes closer to him. Leaning his arms a little behind himself, Will calmly looks at Brown, who doesn't raise a glance at him.

"Mh-okay. Are you sexually active?" he asks calmly, and Will realizes he's relaxed too soon. Well of course he's going to ask very personal questions in his very professional neutral tone. He finds it amusing. Jerk.

"Yes," Graham replies coolly, not looking at Matthew so as not to give him that much pleasure.

"Good. How many sexual partners do you currently have?"

God, idiot. He's dating an idiot. "One. I'm currently in an ongoing relationship with a man" he immediately decides to brush aside the question about orientation and starts to feel a little cocky as a self-protective response he himself doesn't fully realize.

The sliding of pen across paper. Matthew hides a smirk. "And what types of sex do you have? Oral, anal, any other? And do you give or receive each type of it?"

Will finds it hard to tell if he's amused, annoyed, or embarrassed by what's happening. It's quite possible that it's all of the above, but he certainly doesn't feel aroused yet. He forces himself to relax again, resigned to the necessity of having this strange conversation; Graham, of course, had no idea that in fact one of the reasons Brown was conducting this little interrogation was to engage him in a really important talk that was still ahead of them. "All types, in both positions."

Matthew calmly notes something in his clipboard. "Are you using protection? What kind, if any?"

Will sighs. "Sometimes. Condoms" he replies, distracting himself by examining the items on the nightstand. The lube was clearly a new one, but it wasn't the lube that caught his attention, it was the pressure gauge and thermometer. He was getting curious as to whether it was decoration or something Matthew actually planned to use. He was hard to predict in this regard, he had to give him credit for that.

"What's your libido level? And how often do you have sex?"

Will is tempted to quip, noting that Dr. Brown has labeled the reason for the exam as the fact that he's been injuring himself too often lately, and it's unlikely to have anything to do with sex, but decides for his own good not to do this. "Normal. A few times a week. Sometimes a few times a day" saying that, he remembers the first time he got the chance to spend a whole day together with Matthew after he was discharged from the hospital, and it was… something special. Brown had been absolutely delighted with him, almost never leaving him alone, and he hadn't minded, although by the end of the day he had to admit that he felt albeit happy, but terribly tired. He was well past his twenties, and he had never before had a period in his life where he was so sexually active. This was something new, and it was something he had to admit, no matter how much it embarrassed him.

"Is the sex you're having pleasurable for you?"

Well of course now he's just asking for compliments, Will thought, hiding a chuckle. "Yes. Everything's fine" he decides not to give him too much, keeping the same calm and neutral demeanor that Brown maintains.

"And are you and your partner on the same page about what's pleasurable?" Matthew moves closer to the topic at hand, continuing to sound casual and keeping some distance from the man. He raises his gaze, bringing the pen to his mouth, nibbling on the tip out of bad habit. Will averts his gaze below his face for a couple moments, but then mentally deters himself and looks into his eyes calmly.

"I think so," he replies eventually, and Brown nods quietly, writing something down.

Without distracting himself from that, he asks a new question. "Interesting. And do you and your partner talk openly about your sexual desires and boundaries?" he raises his gaze, colliding it with Will's, who presses his lips together, realizing it's a jab in his direction.

Graham averts his gaze stubbornly, turning away and looking again at the nightstand. "How is that relevant to what's going on?" he knows he's being childish, avoiding talking about the issue Matthew has decided to bring up, but he can't help it. Red patches of embarrassment itch on his neck.

"Directly, as far as I'm aware," Brown replies calmly, and then still sets the clipboard aside, clicking the pen one last time and tucking it away in his breast pocket. He takes a couple quiet steps toward the bed, stopping half a step away from Will sitting there. "Mr. Graham, I'm a doctor. You can be completely honest with me. I will never judge you, never accuse you of anything. Neither will your partner," he says, and Graham has to raise his head to look into his face. He, however, almost immediately drops his gaze a little lower, to the area of his nametag, burning the pen with his gaze. Matthew sighs, getting no response, and decides to continue. "See, the thing is, discussing your desires with your partner is a very important part of any relationship if you want it to be a good and lasting one. It's the key to mutual..."

"What if I don't like it?" Graham asks almost defiantly, looking into his green eyes again.

Matthew remains calm, staring back. "In that case, you know the word, Mr. Graham. Just say the word and I'll stop," he says in an even voice, and Will knows he's not lying, and understands perfectly well what word he's talking about. About a month and a half ago, Brown decided to experiment in bed by playing with some handcuffs he stole from work. When Will, feeling a little insecure, remarked that he might panic because of his overly vivid imagination and his long-standing fear of being on the other side of the bars from Brown, the nurse suggested making up a simple safe word that he could simply use to stop what was going on at any moment. They had agreed on the word "whiskey" because, in fact, in the case of such a situation, Will would really need a whiskey to calm down and come to his senses.

Now Graham pressed his lips together and said nothing, only exhaled a little audibly as he lowered his gaze with a hint of obedience.

Brown smiles slightly. "Very good then" he says, and then slips his hands into his pocket and pulls out a package of sterile gloves, opening it. Will immediately clings to it with his gaze, feeling his body tremble. "I have a few more questions before we begin our checkup. Tell me, when was the last time you masturbated, and what were you fantasizing about?"

Graham bites his lip, looking at him, because it takes him a moment to come to terms with the necessity of giving an answer. He realizes why Matthew had actually asked him that question - evidently, he had guessed about Will's recent obsession, and now he wanted to clarify its scope, some details so that he could perhaps make some adjustments to his plan. At the same time, though, the other reason Brown was asking him about it was of course to embarrass him, and, well, he's doing a fine job of it.

Will has to swallow before answering him.

"In the shower, before I came here" he manages to sound calm and confident while looking into the eyes of the young man who looks back at him carefully and with a slight fire in his eyes as he waits for him to continue. "I imagined..." he swallows, as if preparing to jump over a cliff, "my partner snuggled against my back, gagging me with a hand in… a medical glove, to keep me from being too loud while with the other he helps me to the finish line."

Perhaps he was thinking of the prison shower at the hospital where Matthew worked. But talking about it already seemed like something completely over the top, considering that getting into BSHCI was actually a phobia of Will's. He didn't know why his brain was doing this to him, but he didn't want to think about it too much right now anyway.

Brown smiles a bit, keeping his slightly darkened gaze on Graham's face for a long few seconds, but then calmly shifts his eyes to the side, as bright as before. "Good. I think we can start our little examination" he says, starting to put on the blue gloves, doing it quickly and professionally, and Will is mesmerized by the movement, licking his parched lips quickly and feeling a knot of arousal tighten sharply in his lower abdomen. The first glove is followed by a second, and Brown snaps his fingers, looking into the man's face again. "Let me check your lymph nodes first" he says, his gaze slides a little lower and he reaches out with hands, touching his neck on both sides, first closer to the back of his head, then under his ears, gradually probing every inch of Will's sensitive skin, and it takes the man's breath away. Graham raises his gaze to the ceiling, obeying the hands controlling him and tilting his head slightly, and is lost in the contact of the cold latex against his hot skin. "Tell me if it hurts" Brown reminds softly, and notices not without pleasure the man's slightly heavier breathing, flushing under his confident touch. "It would help me if you took off your shirt, actually. It would be easier to feel your shoulders and armpit areas" Matthew says, removing his hands, not touching anything but Will's skin himself, staying close to him, waiting for him to comply with his doctor's instructions.

Graham doesn't look at him, quickly running his tongue over his lips and biting down on the bottom one before swallowing and still pulling his t-shirt off rather quickly, tucking it away.

"Perfect" Brown says contentedly, running his gaze over his now naked body before returning his hands to their place, this time massaging his shoulders in a probing motion. The touches are medical and not erotic, but he can still see that it's working on Will, and it's... interesting. And very good, considering he was worried that Graham would get too nervous from his questions and they'd lose the whole mood. Now that they were done with the chatter for the most part, they had every chance to follow through, and that couldn't have pleased him more. "Everything feels normal. I think we'll deal with the lymph nodes in the groin area a little later, okay? Now, since you've already taken your shirt off, I'd like to check your lungs and heart, if you don't mind" he smiles slightly, taking the stethoscope and sending a look to Will's blue eyes. "The idea of being able to hear internal sounds has always fascinated me" he shares, "it's… very intimate" the younger man purrs softly, lowering his gaze and leaning the cold diaphragm of the stethoscope against his smooth chest and Graham reflexively flinches. Matthew understandably moves the device aside and raises his gaze to his face, smiling. "My bad. Give me a moment, I'll fix it," he says, and then brings the thing closer to his mouth, blowing his warm breath over it, keeping his look on Will's face, and then rubs the diaphragm and squeezes it in his palm for a couple of moments. "That's it. Should be a little warmer now. You'll still have to tolerate a little discomfort, but I'm sure you can handle it," he says, returning the stethoscope to Graham's chest. It's only slightly warmer now, but it does feel better, and Will, biting his lip, lets him do the necessary manipulations with it.

To make himself more comfortable, Matthew pulls over the wheeled chair he used to sit in at his desk when he was studying something on his laptop (mostly Freddie Lounds articles or other crime stories, especially those that mentioned Will in any way, or cases the FBI had invited him to investigate), and sits down. He listens to the sounds for about a minute, noting to himself that everything is quite normal with both his lungs and his heart (and he can't help but be pleased about this; it would be embarrassing to tell Will in the morning to go see a real doctor to deal with something he found suspicious, he must admit).

A slight, almost imperceptible smile plays across his face as he enjoys what's going on inside Will like special, almost sacred music. When he forces himself to stop in order to move on to the next thing, he finally peeks again into his eyes.

"Slightly rapid heartbeat, but I don't think it's a problem. You're just a little agitated" he says in an understanding tone, putting the stethoscope aside, and pulls out a pen torch, flicking it on, turning on a small flashlight. "Now I want to look into your beautiful eyes. It will seem a little bright, but I assure you it is fine and will not harm you. Just watch the light, please. Don't move your head - only your eyes," he brings his free hand up to his face and takes him gently by the chin, and Will swallows, feeling like an obedient toy in his skillful and confident hands. He does exactly what is asked of him, and Matthew watches his pupils with the enthusiasm of a playful kitten watching a fish swimming in a tank. "Perfect. You can blink. Now I need to look a little closer, if you don't mind. Like this" he continues to hold his face with one hand as he moves closer and turns the flashlight on again. "Look to the right. Good. Now to the left. Yes. Wonderful. Now right in front of you. Yeah, everything's just great," he removes both the flashlight and his hand, and Will feels strange, trying to pay attention to his own sensations. It's as if he can't dare say anything, being able only to follow simple instructions and melt under his partner's sure touch, and it's unexpectedly breathtaking.

In a way, it's even more pleasurable than when he was handcuffed to the bed - physically he's free to get up and leave at any moment, but in reality he chooses not to, constrained more by an understanding of the necessity of what's happening than by any sort of real restraints.

"I can see that your nose was broken some time ago. Let me see if it's okay now" he says, tilting his head slightly to one side, then the other, and back a little.

Will is completely engrossed, almost hypnotized by the feel of the latex on his jaw, and dick in his boxers is getting hard shamefully fast. He strangely regrets not wearing pants.

"Well, it seems to be okay. But I'd advise you not to get into any more fights just for the sake of getting attention, especially the one that can be achieved by methods that are much safer for your health, Mr. Graham" he smirks slightly, meeting his gaze for a couple of moments, and then just as calmly and quickly changing the subject. "Now open your mouth for me please, I need to look at your throat to see if everything’s alright" he takes his hand away from his face, waiting for Will to gather his thoughts and comply with his request. "Excellent" he says not without pleasure when he does it. "Wider, please" he turns the flashlight back on and then pulls a packaged sterile throat stick out of his pocket and opens it, but then it's as if he notices something. "Oh, it seems the packaging was damaged and this thing isn't so sterile anymore. Well, that's not a problem" he carelessly tosses the stick somewhere to the side and takes off his gloves, only to put on a new, sterile pair. Will is still waiting for him with his mouth wide open and his breath catching. As he leans closer, Brown places two fingers on Will's tongue, pressing lightly, and Graham rolls his eyes in a strange fit of pleasure, feeling the latex with his taste buds. His mouth is open, and he can't manage to suppress the quiet moan rising from his throat. "Mm... be patient just a little longer, please" Matthew says, though he himself is almost losing his head, and maintains eye contact with the man for a couple of moments, barely restraining himself in front of such a beautiful sight.

Will had always found it hard to be submissive, even though it was what he actually desired. In those rare moments when he gave him a blowjob, he didn't really show any submission, and it felt more like he was dominating, controlling Matthew, driving him insane with his tongue. Brown remembers Will choking on his cock yesterday morning, making him whimper and clutch the sheets, and that image makes him lick his lips as he uses the flashlight to peer inside the man, for a couple moments longer than necessary keeping his mouth fully open. "Perfect. You can close your mouth now. If you want to, of course" he says with slight mirth as he takes his fingers away from his tongue and flicks the flashlight off.

Will closes his mouth as it doesn't look like he's going to get anything put back in there soon, and swallows his saliva as he continues to watch Brown's actions. He feels drunk and has an absurd urge to cover his boner.

"Now we're going to measure your blood pressure. Give me your left hand, please. Yes, like this" he says, taking an automatic blood pressure cuff. He takes the sleeve and wraps it around the man's forearm, fastening it. "Not too tight? Good. Now the mechanical magic will begin. It might squeeze a bit, so don't freak out, if it does, it'll be fine - I'm right here" he says soothingly, holding his hand, pressing a button, and the device begins to work, making a soft sound as the walls of the sleeve squeeze Will's forearm. He swallows. It’s not that he's nervous, but he feels a little odd. Not the kind of toys in bed he used to think about. It's like he's fifty already.

Finally it ends, and his hand is released. Matthew takes off his sleeve, examining the numbers on the screen. "Low, but not critical. Your pulse is indeed a little high - but I think it's still just your nervousness, not tachycardia" he smiles slightly, looking at his face, and then adjusts the gloves that fit his fingers perfectly. Will is once again visited by the thought of those fingers inside himself, not fundamentally certain where exactly inside. "Now. You need to lie on your back, I'm going to check the lymph nodes in your groin area."

That sounded like something much closer to the goal of their appointment already, but Will was still in no hurry to hope for anything - he was almost certain that Matthew would delay the inevitable for a while longer before grabbing the lube from the nightstand and giving Will what they both really wanted. Graham complies though, lying down on the bed, only now noting the fresh bedding that the young man must have changed while he was in the shower. It smells pleasantly of powder and somehow gives the impression of sterility. Will tries to relax, though the stupid, inappropriate awkwardness is starting to come back to him after the change of position; he'd been in front of this man naked and in various compromising positions god knows how many times, it didn't make any sense, and yet it felt different. Like the first time. Like being with a stranger. Will feels as if his nerves have been exposed, he's sensitive and edgy and bites his lower lip in an attempt not to express too much awkwardness. The tent on his boxers is just embarrassing as hell.

Matthew adjusts his gloves once more before approaching the man and pulling his boxers down just a little, an inch or two at most, saying nothing about his patient's obvious peculiar condition, as if he doesn't care at all about the man's already pretty hard cock. Instead of paying attention to it, as he would normally do with great joy, he starts probing the slightly palpable lymph nodes on either side of his groin. "Tell me if it hurts" he says, concentrating on massaging it, licking his lips quickly, trying to maintain focus - which was actually difficult around Will, but so far quite possible. "It's all good. I think we're done with the checkup" he finally says, shifting his gaze to Graham after a couple moments, palms left resting on his stomach. "Oh, but we still have a bit of a problem, don't we? You see, I'm a little concerned about your sex life" he says while sounding calm and even almost detached, almost professional. "The fact that you feel like you have to hide something from your partner is not a good sign" he tsks his tongue a few times, shaking his head. "It shows a lack of trust. Tell me, you don't trust your partner?"

Will shakes his head, but after a couple of seconds he realizes he's expected to give a verbal answer. "No, I do. Of course I do" he sighs loudly, looking up at the ceiling before still glancing with slight guilt at Matthew. It's easy for him to do the pitiful puppy dog look, but their relationship has lasted long enough for Brown to be able to resist it for at least a little while.

"So it's about something else then," he continues to ponder quietly, then tilts his head to the side. "Maybe it's all about your stiffness? You're too shy to talk about it because you think your fantasies will show you in a bad light, don’t you?"

"What is it now, a therapy session?" Will asks somewhat nervously.

Matthew remains calm, shrugging almost phlegmatically. "You can take it that I have a very broad specialization. Besides, our brains and our bodies are very closely linked, you can't have the health of one without the health of the other" he remarks, thoughtfully touching a mark from an old knife wound left on Will during his time as a police officer. "Well?"

Graham licks his lips, and realizes from the silence in the room that Brown is waiting for his explanation or confession. Which is pretty mean of him, and not at all conducive to the excitement that had been close to the necessary point before that. It's a little frustrating, and Will doesn't need to hear from anyone that it's his own fault. He already knows that himself and he hates it.

"My imagination is sometimes hard to control," he finally replies and swallows, "these kinds of fantasies are an inevitability."

"But not the feelings they evoke in you" Matthew remarks, bringing the calm look back to his face. He sighs. "You know, you're very uptight, it can cause problems in your love life. The need to keep something a secret, to masturbate to explicit fantasies in the shower when your lover is waiting in bed" he shakes his head. "That's not a good thing. What if your imagination throws you another fantasy like that, or even more… curious one?"

"I'll talk to my partner" Will exhales.

"I highly doubt that at this moment, my boy," Matthew says simply. He takes his wrist, pressing lightly on it with two fingers as if to count his pulse. "You need to sexually liberate yourself. Until you feel free enough with your desires, you won't be able to find the strength to share them with even the closest person... So what do we do about it, hmm?" he takes his gaze away from his face, blatantly directing it to the man's groin, managing to keep a thoughtful face. Will's heartbeat speeds up slightly under his fingers, and it gives the younger man a faint smirk, which he hides. "Yeah, I think that might help..." he says softly under his breath, and then suddenly removes his hands and straightens his back, turning around in his chair towards the bedside table. "Strip, please. The gloves seem to have been an important detail of your fantasy, haven't they?" he asks calmly, taking the lube and unscrewing the cap, turning to face Will again, who hesitates a little, but then still removes his boxers, remaining completely naked in front of a fully clothed Brown.

A slight blush is visible on his cheeks, and Matthew finds it just illicitly adorable.

He squeezes some odorless, colorless liquid onto his gloves and rubs it between his fingers and palms, preparing himself. "Tell me, what other fantasies have you had?" he asks calmly, taking his still fairly soft cock in his hand, making Will wince and move his legs. Brown raises his gaze to the man's face, waiting for an answer as his palm moves smoothly over his dick beginning to harden rapidly. He sees Graham inhale nervously and his chest heaves as he bites his lips in an attempt to relax. "I anticipate your response, Mr. Graham."

"Shit. Okay," he stares at the ceiling, licking his lips, making a deal with his own embarrassment. Will closes his eyes, and Matthew admires the frown of tension creasing between his brows. "I was imagining you..."

"Uh-um," he reminds him softly of their ongoing game.

Will blows air out of his nose. "I imagined him wrapping... fuck... wrapping a bandage around the wound on my thigh" he feels his cheeks redden, but forces himself to continue. "And then sucks me off, running his hands... in those gloves... uh, over my chest."

"Very good," Matthew decides to reward him for his honesty, moving his free hand to his chest, running it over his nipples before taking one of them and rubbing it, making Will, already hard, moan. "What else?"

Excitement makes him talkative. "His fingers in my mouth while he fucks me" he bites his lip, suppressing a moan, simultaneously from the sensations and the memory of the hot fantasy, "in his med clothes" Graham finishes, exhaling, the hand on his cock speeding up slightly only to slow down again a couple moments later, distancing his orgasm.

"Excellent" Matthew says in a soft voice before he stops touching his dick altogether, the damp fingers of his glove watering his thigh, causing him to sob quietly, covering his eyes. "Anything else?" he looks up into the man's face, tilting his head to the side, listening to his heavy breathing. Will is incredibly handsome, and the slight patina of vulnerability that appears on him in those moments when Brown brings him to this state only adds to his charm. His expression is almost pitiful, and Matthew shakes his head, feeling utterly in love and a little cruel. "No one said treatment would be easy and painless, Mr. Graham. You're going to have to be a little patient to get a good result... and your treatment would really benefit from being completely honest with your doctor. Come on," he strokes his thigh with the palm of his hand, "do you want me to bring syringes here next time? Or maybe I should bring something else from work?"

Will feels like he's woefully lacking touches right now, and also that he's not sure how to answer Matthew's question. He decides to put those thoughts aside for later and focus on the fantasies he already had in his head before this whole weird flu dream started. "How he's stretching me with his fingers."

"With gloves on him, hmm?" Brown smirks, looking up into his face. "Classic prostate massage? Shall we try it?" he suggests, taking both hands away from his body, and Graham suddenly feels a rush of cold, realizing again that he's completely naked. He opens his mouth to say something, but then sees Matthew squeeze some more lube onto his right hand and get up from the chair, and he falls silent, deciding to just trust the man. That thought of trust suddenly helps him relax and he exhales slowly, only silently watching as Brown sits down on the bed. "Roll over, please. Yes, like this" he says, moving his legs himself so that they both feel more comfortable, and running a drier palm over his man's lower back. Matthew himself trembles slightly with anticipation, but continues to try to keep his mask on even when Will can't see him, clutching the pillow beneath himself. "Try to relax to make it easier, okay?" he says, then brings two fingers up to his entrance, after a couple seconds of delay gently sliding them inside, not wanting to hurt Will in any way, but considering they had sex last night, and in general more or less regularly lately.

Graham was pretty tight anyway, and he sobbed quietly at the penetration. Matthew decides to give him time to get used to it, not allowing himself to treat Will in any hard way, just to avoid hurting him even during these games.

"Relax. It's okay, you can take it. This is what you wanted so badly, isn't it?" he penetrates a little deeper and Graham moans softly. "That's okay, don't be shy. Let yourself be louder. You don't have to hold back yourself or your desires. That's the point of what's going on... Normally, of course, prostate massage is more physical and medical in nature, but our case is special and therefore requires a special technique, don't you think?" he finds his prostate with movements already learned by heart, and Will flinches, gasping; when Matthew repeats the touch, a delightfully vocal whimper escapes the man's lips, and Brown smiles contentedly. "There you go. The glove feels pretty good, doesn't it? Just like you imagined?"

"Mhm!" Will whimpers loudly as Matthew pulls his fingers out to add some more lube and insert three into him already. "Oh god..." he exhales, feeling himself filled again, and desperately tries to focus his thoughts as Matthew's free hand strokes his lower back.

"Well?"

"Fuck yes- yes, it's just as I imagined! So... amhm, good..." he squints, and then still moans from the massage, from the off the charts sensations. He feels like he's getting dizzy.

"Of course. You have a very good imagination, don't you? I'm wondering," he runs his palm over his back not without pleasure, noticing the bite mark on his shoulder (which, of course, he himself had reverently treated as soon as he came to his senses after an orgasm), "is it all about the feeling of someone taking control to take care of you? That's the root of your fantasies, am I right?" Brown asks, flexing his fingers slightly, and Will nods into the pillow, groaning, bashfully hiding his face, muffling a sob. "There, there. Gotta hold out a little longer, Mr. Graham. And I'll take care of you, don't worry... how are you feeling? Better? More confident? Do you understand now why secrets are bad?"

"Yes!" Will squints, biting his lip and resting his forehead against the pillow, feeling the pleasure as if it were tightening ropes around his body, cutting off his oxygen and preventing him from moving. Something has clearly shorted out in his head, as if a lightning strike had blown all the fuses. He felt absurdly sensitive under Matthew's hands, and wanted more.

"That's right," Brown says contentedly, and then withdraws his fingers from him, leaning closer to Graham's ear. "Now," he exhales and licks his lips, feeling like a caged predator who has to watch a fresh steak lying out of his reach, "tell Dr. Brown what you want, and oh, I promise I'll do anything to fulfill your sweet request..." he says hotly in his ear, purposely adding slutty notes to drive his man even crazier.

Will is so damn weak in front of this, especially when he feels so empty, unfilled, and the lube-slick hands in latex gloves slip carelessly over his shoulder blade and down his neck. Under normal circumstances, when Matthew tried to get him to say something about his desires, Graham preferred to shut him up with a kiss or something else, acting instead of talking, and his enthusiasm kept the Browns from becoming frustrated. Right now, however, Will was completely at his mercy, pinned to the bed, needy, trembling in front of a fully clothed man. That thought was driving him crazy and he moaned with his mouth closed before still trying to say it all out loud. "I want you to fuck me," he gulped, "doctor."

Matthew smirks smugly, almost purring with pleasure, lowering his hand and squeezing his buttock possessively. "Yeah, and what's your boyfriend going to think of that, hmm?" he bites his lip, looking at the sweating man beneath him.

Will groans anguishedly. "Now I want to hit you" he says and Brown smiles widely, leaning in to be even closer to his lover's ear.

"Ooh, is that another kink you've been silent about? Well, I guess we can talk about it a little later" he laughs softly, hearing a new irritated moan from the needy Graham. "Well, well, relax, Mr. Graham. Like I said - I'll fulfill your any request..." Matthew licks his lips, looking at him for a couple of moments before pulling away only to confidently roll Will over onto his back to look into his face, which has a pillow mark on it. It's adorable and his heart melts and he smiles softly, looking at it like he was watching a cute little stray kitten on the street. He doesn't hold back and reaches out, with latex glove stroking his cheek, causing Will to sob quietly at this unexpected tenderness. Opening his eyes, he stares hazy at Brown, breathing through his adorably ajar mouth. Matthew slides his fingers over his lips before still removing his hand, returning a little closer to his role, and lowering his gaze to his expiring cock.

He squashes the urge to play with his favorite toy, instead shifting his attention to the pillow on his side of the bed. Moving over, he picks up a wrapped condom from underneath it.

"You should always use protection when making such contacts with strangers," he jokingly remarks with a playfully serious tone, but he can't hold back a smile.

Will exhales through his mouth, staring at the ceiling for a couple moments, but then decides to give up and play along with Brown's joke. "You may need to carry another protection with you after this. My boyfriend can be very jealous" he says licking his lips, looking at Matthew again, and decides to say one more thing while he has the nerve to do so. "I've made him jealous on purpose a couple times. I like it when he acts like he's ready to kill anyone who touches me."

Brown's eyes light up as he freezes with the pack of condom in his teeth, having never opened it, and immediately darken dangerously. He takes the condom from his mouth without taking his eyes off Will and shakes his head, aroused just to the point of insanity. "You're playing with fire, Mr. Graham," he warns, and Will realizes with not a small amount of amusement that Brown really damn well didn't have a clue about it. Well, at least he'd managed to keep something from him. "What if he does kill someone one day, hmm?"

Will could easily imagine it. Matthew coming home, stained in blood, with some kind of ordinary hammer in his hands. Having taken a life. Graham can't help but admit that in the moment it would be so sexy that he'd lose his mind having hardcore sex with him right in the kitchen or even against the wall right outside the front door where he saw him like that. Still, the likely consequences were something he couldn't forget even in this moment of almost animal passion. "I don't have a sexual fantasy about having sex with a prisoner" he replies, looking into the man's darkened eyes. "And being on the run with seven dogs isn't very convenient. So I'm hoping for his common sense to win and that I don't have to spend an increasing amount of time in the shower, left alone with my dirty fantasies while he runs circles around his cell at the hospital for the criminally insane".

Brown hums, biting his lip. "God, you really do love him," he purrs contentedly, and Will snorts, rolling his eyes, answering nothing to that. "So... that means you like to tease him, don't you?" suddenly his tone changes a little, and he strokes the man's thighs thoughtfully with his palms, catching his gaze again with pleasure. "What if someone starts teasing you, hmm? Is that what you like?" he asks, and Will realizes he's in a mess he can't get out of. No, of course there is a way out of here - with a red whiskey sign above it - but Graham doesn't want to leave like that, not really. "What if we wait a little longer before continuing with our procedure? Yeah, as your personal doctor, I think that would be best for you right now" he teasingly touches his nipples with his fingertips, as if casually tapping them as he strokes his chest, and then still squeezes them, causing Will to moan with his lips closed. Satisfied only slightly, Matthew smiles and then suddenly gets out of bed, leaving the man without his attention. Graham blinks confusedly, turning his head in the right direction as if waiting for an explanation.

Brown seems completely calm and collected, removing his gloves. "Doctor...?" Will compromises with himself, and is rewarded with a pretty smile from the young man.

"Don't worry. It's just so hot in here, and my hands are sweating. I'll be back in a minute," he says, winking at Graham, who leans his head back on the pillow, scolding him under his breath, causing Matthew to chuckle. "No one said therapy is easy, Mr. Graham" he says, and then really walks out of the room, leaving a naked, stretched out and fully ready Will completely alone.

He feels like a fire left unattended. Biting his lip, he lowers his hand, fingering his own entrance with two fingers, but realizes almost immediately that it's not what he needs. This makes him impatient to add another finger, penetrating deeper, trying to find a prostate, but his body feels tricked and he almost whimpers in frustration at this. He still couldn't get over the idea that since Matthew had come into his life, he had never been able to truly enjoy being alone with himself. His empathy made him absorb Brown's tumultuous emotions and made everything so much better, sharper, brighter, that against that backdrop, any solo action seemed like something akin to a non-alcoholic beer for an alcoholic. Almost pointless.

"Impatient, huh?" he hears Matthew's voice suddenly and opens his eyes to see him by the door smearing his hands with some sort of antiseptic, the smell of which has a strange effect on Will, making him swallow. He doesn't remove his fingers, moving them again, and sobs quietly as he touches his prostate. "Oohh, poor thing," Brown moves closer, tilting his head to the side, "can't make it on your own at all". He pulls out new gloves, putting them on, keeping his gaze on his blue eyes, listening to the quiet unrestrained sounds building up in Will's throat. "So badly in need of someone to play the right notes on that beautiful instrument of yours" he smiles, looking down at him, into his handsome face, into his cute blue eyes. Matthew reaches out, touching his cheek, softly, almost comfortingly. "So needy for me," he says touchingly, and Will shivers with tenderness, whimpering. "Ohhh, don't cry. It's all right. Of course I'll take care of you. That's what I'm here for" he says it with the softness of a lover, and then leans down to his beautifully opened lips, leaving a light kiss on them, pulling away after a couple moments with a dreamy smile on his face. "Mmm... I really envy your boyfriend."

The time spent in the bathroom had helped him calm down a bit, but he was still hard and horny. He climbed onto the bed, taking Will by the wrist, pulling his hand away from his stretched entrance and gladly replacing his fingers with his own, just to torture the heated man quite a bit more, wrenching sweet sounds of painful pleasure out of him.

"Fuck... uhh, please..." Graham whimpers, before biting his lip and whining quietly, and Brown can't say no to him.

Matthew tears off the edge of the package with his teeth and pulls out a condom, slipping it on a little hurriedly, feeling the current in his fingertips from arousal. He doesn't undress, just unzips his pants to get his cock out and, holding Will by the knee, spreads his legs wide, continuing to manipulate him with the confidence of a professional. "That's it. It may hurt a little, but you have nothing to worry about, Mr. Graham. I am a doctor, after all" Brown smirks, feeling how hot he is in all those clothes, but absolutely willing to put up with it to give Will total pleasure and satisfy all his desires and dreams. He enters him, biting his lower lip and watching the expression on his man's face like footage from a world recognized masterpiece of global cinematography. Graham lets out a moan, and Matthew thinks he's ready to listen to this song forever, because nothing else makes him so happy and stupidly in love. "Yeahhhh, you like it?" he asks excitedly, taking his hand and bringing it closer to his face, squeezing his palm, making the glove creak slightly. "You like it when I take care of you?" he moves leisurely and touches his lips to Will's fingers, admiring his face, the way he breathes heavily and makes quiet noises, relaxing, giving himself to him completely.

"Yes..." the quiet whisper is very loud in the room, and Matthew smiles contentedly, making a few deep thrusts, coaxing a loud moan out of the man, before slowing down again, acting gentler. He kisses his fingers, capturing them with his lips and running his tongue over them before sucking one in, blissfully covering his eyes and bemoaning the fact that he can't suck Will's cock, ride him and fuck him like that at the same time. The world isn't fair since that's not possible in it. "Please..." Graham's voice distracts him, pitiful and demanding, and Brown opens his eyes, looking up at him in a light haze, releasing his finger from his mouth.

It takes him a couple moments to realize what Will wants, and when it finally gets to him, he smirks. "Oh, of course. How could I forget?" he releases his hand and slides his palm up his naked hot body, up his neck, the Adam's apple of his throat, that quivers as Graham swallows in anticipation, and finally to his mouth, ajar, ready. "God, you're such an adorable slut, Mr. Graham," Matthew stretches lovingly, his voice like hot honey dripping off a spoon into a cup of tea. He doesn't let Will answer, penetrating him with three fingers at once, and Graham moans, feeling the latex on his tongue, rolling his eyes. He starts sucking on them, enthusiastically, devotedly, as Brown continues to build up the pace, fucking him with determination, his free hand covering his chest and squeezing, twisting his nipple. There is so much stimulation that Will feels like he's losing himself, completely unable to think about anything, just surrendering to this moment, tense with every cell of his body, wanting only one thing, the one that only Matthew can give him. With his free hands he stops clutching the crumpled sheets and clings to Brown's med coat, and moans with his fingers in his mouth. "Oh fuck... you..." the young man almost gasps, moving closer to his pleasure, "you're so needy, baby. I want to give you everything. Everything you've ever dreamed of" he says, and he hears Will moan in response. "Yeah, oh, fuck yeah!" he speeds up, completely on edge, and he hears-feels his fingers slipping out of the man's hot mouth.

"Please..." he whimpers. "Please... mh, please, make me... let me..." Will fails at articulating a single coherent thought, but Brown captures the meaning of his plea, smiling, looking into his face with love.

"Do it," he says, continuing to play in his own way. "Do it for me. You can do it like this" Matthew runs his fingertips over his lips and Graham, almost crying, shakes his head desperately. "Oh, but I think you can, honey. If you try really hard, you can cum like this. For me. Just trust the doctor, he knows what you really need" at these words Will sobs and Brown can't stop looking at his face, admiring it, the trail of tears from tightly closed eyes, open lips, from which come such beautiful sounds that Matthew is willing to kill and die for them. "You can do it baby, I know you can. You always do so well for me... I know it's hard, but I'm here, for you. C’mon, be a good patient, do what the doctor told you to" he moves fast and hard inside him, himself moaning softly from the overdose of pleasure seeking release, and he thrusts his fingers into Will's mouth, feeling him suck on them immediately, but not for long - a couple moments, and he's too lost in his senses, opening his mouth wide and whimpering loudly and nonstop, until finally, with a new deep thrust, he cums, arching his back, staining himself, the new bedding and Brown's white uniform with white semen. The young man catches up with him after a couple thrusts, letting himself go, letting out a quiet but sensual moan, squinting and dropping his head forward.

Only their heavy breathing can be heard in the room as they try to catch their breath, but soon they fall silent, just lying there quietly. Matthew forces himself to come to his senses first, and he lifts his head from the other man's chest, leaving only a soft kiss on it, and then with a smile he moves closer to Graham's face, where the tear tracks were still visible. He smiles softly, kissing his cheeks before touching his lips to Graham's, drawing him into a deep kiss full of love and tenderness.

"Are you okay?" Brown asks as he pulls back a little, looking into his face, and Will, licking his lips, nods a few times, not trusting his voice. "Good. I'm about to die of heat," he sighs, sitting up on the bed, starting to pull off first his gloves and then his clothes, tossing them carelessly to the floor, and Graham watches in silence as he undresses, slowly coming to his senses and getting his ability to think back. "Oh my God. Next time we'll limit ourselves to a coat, okay? Or will open the windows" he tosses his t-shirt following his pants and then, completely naked, falls onto his back, closing his eyes and smiling weakly.

"Matthew," Will calls softly to him after a while, and the young man turns his head, looking at his lover calmly and with a slight smile. Graham probably wants to say something gentle, maybe even thank you, or promise him not to hide anything anymore, but instead he frowns half-jokingly. "Did you just call me a slut?"

Brown raises his eyebrows and places a hand on his chest. "Me? I have no idea what you're talking about. I wasn't even here before this moment."

Will grins, looking up at the ceiling again. "Great, now my boyfriend has a split personality" he says, and Matthew, smiling, lies down closer to him, placing his hand on his chest. He feels the beating of his heart under his palm and casts a glance in the direction of the stethoscope, biting his lip, deciding to clear something up for himself first.

"So you didn't like it? When I called you my adorable slut" he clarifies the question, looking innocently into Graham's face. "I can apologize."

Will opens and closes his mouth a few times and then snorts, rolling his eyes and putting his arm around the young man. "Shut up" he says, and Brown smiles, taking that as an admission that Graham liked it after all, and making a note of it in his head. Sighing, he looks at the stethoscope again and decides to take it eventually. "What are you doing?" Will asks a little confused as Matthew warms it in his hands before placing it against the man's chest.

"I wasn't lying. I've always found it fascinating to hear people's inner sounds. Especially yours, baby" he smiles, putting the device on himself and starting to listen to the heartbeat and the quiet noise in his lungs as Will stares at it in thoughtful silence, realizing that he is madly, truly in love with him.

Perhaps he really does deserve to be trusted more.