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Chapter Text

“Hold on, I still want you  

Come back, I still need you 
Let me take your hand, I'll make it right 
I swear to love you all my life 
Hold on, I still need you.” 

Hold on 
Chord Oversteer 

Chapter 5  

Building a hot water pool was Ghislaine's idea. Manon had nothing against a warm bath. After two weeks of washing in cold water, Manon was ready to give her soul to the Darkness in exchange for one warm bath. It was stupid, said her rational side. Wanting something as trivial as a hot bath was stupid. 

But Manon couldn't help dreaming of immersing herself in warm water. Especially since the freezing temperatures outside were getting harder. Thirteen still hunted for their own food in the forest and fished for it in a nearby river. Asterin had given the order to roast the meat outside, and Manon had not resisted. In general, as her pregnancy progressed, she had allowed Asterin to take more responsibility for the entire coven. Manon was constantly exhausted and hungry, and she could not find the extra energy to command her witches. 

The cold had crept even into the cave, despite the fact that they had blocked every possible gap through which cold air could have slipped in. Manon woke up every morning cold and with a stiff back. Still, she insisted every day that she could leave the cave for a short walk. Although it was more uncomfortable by the day. 

Manon's pants were simply too cramped for her growing belly, which now stood out from under her clothes. It wouldn't be long before the shirt might be too small. Putting on the witch leather was a pain, as they were far too tight for Manon's swollen body. 

Thea had cautiously suggested over the campfire that Manon should get new clothes. Pregnancy clothes, to put it better. Manon instinctively wanted to argue against, but Thea was right.  

She agreed that the next group that would fetch her food from the village would also bring her something else to wear. And preferably warm, as Manon was constantly freezing. No matter how many layers of clothing she wrapped around her, the cold somehow found her. 

That was also a side effect of pregnancy, and Asterin said Manon should just try to stay as warm as possible and eat something more than just apples. The veggie pie Vesta had bought Manon, she had ate in one sitting and then glare around murderously, warning her witches to shut up. 

No one had said anything, but Asterin had looked pleased. When Manon started eating more, she noticed that she was getting better, but it didn't help much with the cold. 

So Manon really had no objection to them building a hot water pool. 

"We need to divert the stream water to another place," Ghsilaine explained, drawing a plan on the ground with a stick. “We can't use all the water because we still need a separate source of drinking water." 

Vesta leaned closer to investigate the drawing, reddish-brown brows furrowed. "We could develop some kind of water rationing system," she said. “Something that would stop the water coming in when the pool was full." 

Ghsilaine nodded thoughtfully and drew a new line in the sand. "How did you think to handle water heating?” Fallon asked, stretching her neck to see the plan. “With fire," Ghsilaine replied absentmindedly. "We dig one pit and pave it with stones. Then we dig ditches around the pool, fill them with wood and set them on fire." 

Asterin, who was sitting next to Manon, frowned. “Are you sure it works?” she asked. Manon did not participate in the discussion. She listened, while trying to find a good position on her pad. Her back ached. 

Ghslaine glared sharply up from his drawing, confronted with Asterin's doubting gaze. "I've seen it work," she replied. "And if you want a warm bath, follow my instructions and don't ask stupid questions." 

Asterin raised her eyebrows at Ghsilaine's tone of voice, but said nothing. There had been a time when Ghsilaine would have been beaten for giving orders to second in her coven. Now no one cared. Ghsilaine had an idea and was the smartest and oldest of Manon's witches. Knowledge was her trump card. She knew what she wanted and how to achieve it. 

No one questioned the idea again as Ghsilaine leaned over her drawing and began to explain in detail how to act. Thirteen listened carefully and occasionally asked clarifying questions. Manon didn't bother to say anything. She had just found a good position in which she was good. However, she knew that she would not be allowed to participate in digging or carrying stones. 

Without noticing, still listening to the conversation going on, Manon raised her hands to her belly. Under the rough fabric, the stomach felt warm and swollen. Can you hear them witchling? Manon thought absentmindedly as Thirteen began to divide tasks among themselves. No one seemed very eager to go to the village to buy shovels and more food for Manon. 

Manon sighed when she heard it. Her appetite only grew. It was normal, Asterin kept telling her. Manon ate for two. Manon felt like she ate one army's worth of food a day, but she said nothing about it to Asterin. She still felt uncomfortable eating in front of her coven. 

Manon didn't like being pregnant. It limited her life far too much. Watching Briar and Imogen spar yesterday, Manon would have given anything to do the same. She was constantly bored and bored made her grumpy. 

The only sign of the existence of the whole baby was just a bulging belly, which Manon instinctively and obsessively protected. 

Despite knowing she was pregnant, Manon still couldn't think of her witchling as a living, breathing, and intellectual being. Until now, pregnancy had only been a state of being. Unpleasant being. 

The construction of the hot water pool took many days. The only work Manon was allowed to do was grind the rocks smoothly or make sure that the stream from the wall was evenly distributed in the two basins that gradually formed. The first was small and natural. A deep, nature-shaped stonewell filled with ice-cold water. One was going to be a big, warm pool that should hold thirteen witches at once. 

Manon watched as Thea, Kaya, and the twins began to place the stones, led by Ghislaine. She sat cross-legged—the best position that morning – and nibbled on a small pastry that the group that had visited the village had brought in the morning. It was still partly warm and Manon enjoyed the sweetness of the pastry. Asterin sat behind her and, with accustomed movements, massaged Manon's stiff muscles. 

"What position are you sleeping in?" Asterin ask while massaging Manon's lower back. "In a comfortable position," Manon muttered, barely holding in a satisfied grunt. The touch of Asterin's warm hands on Manon's lower back was heavenly. Asterin sighed and continued rubbing. Manon hadn't asked for it. Her pride didn't allow her to ask for help, but she knew how to accept it. For a century, Manon had been the feared leader of the Thirteen. The change from having to let his witches pamper her was... bothersome. Difficult. Strange. 

Manon did not resist when Asterin suggested that she try to rub Manon's back muscles open. She did not resist much these days. Unless you count the pregnancy dress Briar brought to the cave. Manon hadn't agreed to put it on, until she noticed the morning before that her pants had become too small. 

Swearing to herself, Manon had changed into a white, loose-fitting dress. It had been the warmest garment Manon had worn in the last three weeks. 

A cold breeze passed through the cave and made Manon shiver despite her warm dress. Asterin growled softly, immediately noticing Manon's discomfort. Manon glanced over her shoulder sharply, telling Asterin to restrain herself. In a way, Manon understood Asterin's overprotective behavior. It was much more powerful for her than for the other witches of Manon. Still, Manon had to restrain herself at times so as not to hit Asterin when she as she spun around Manon. She was not going to punish Asterin for this concern. Manon wouldn't do that because she understood where the fear came from. 

Asterin was a mother who had lost her child. She didn't want Manon to experience the same pain. None of the Thirteen wanted that. 

Briar and Edda entered the cave, shaking the snow from their cloaks. Briar had let the black color of her black hair slowly fade back to the white like the moon. Edda, on the other hand, continued to dye her hair black. Briar had explained that in the snow, white hair would not stand out as easily as black hair.Edda's hair was black because she needed to be able to patrol at night. They were no longer Shadows, Manon thought as she looked at her cousins. They were like the two faces of the moon. 

It was just one thing that had changed in the Thirteen. 

"Nothing to worry about," Edda announced, throwing off her snow-covered cloak. Asterin lowered her hand from Manon's lower back, which was unfortunate. "How far did you go?" Asterin asked. Manon should have done it, and some part of her became agitated, as if believing Asterin was trying to oust her. Manon forced that instinct down. It was her grandmother who had taught Manon not to trust anyone. Not even to her own coven. 

"We went all the way to the edge of the village," Birar reported, pulling the cloak off her shoulders. "Nothing. A couple of human hunters and three moose tracks, but that's about it." 

Manon sensed her cousin's relaxation behind her. She wasn't the only one who feared that some other coven would find them before spring. “Good," Asterin said, nodding at Briar and Edda. The two threw their cloaks brooms over the pile and walked across the cave to the campfire. Next to it steamed the remnants of the previous evening's food. "Did you see Imogen and Vesta on the way?” Sorrel asked. She sat by the campfire and watched the fire. The campfire was not allowed to go out, because despite the sheltered location of the cave, it would instantly grow cold if the fire did not keep burning. Briar and Edda shook their heads.“We could smell their tracks," Edda said. "But we didn't see them." 

Imogen and Vesta had gone at the same time as the Shadows to get more firewood for the campfire. Manon didn't know how far into the forest they had to go, as she was hardly allowed out of the cave anymore. 

The frost had been severe for the past few weeks, and Manon's warmest clothes could no longer fit on her. It had caused Manon to abandon her walks, much to Asterin's delight and her own irritation. 

Manon's muscle aches did little to improve with constant standing still. And she complained about it to her bulging belly, which was the reason for that situation. 

The witchling still hadn't shown any signs of herself, although Ghislaine had said that these days Manon should feel her baby's movements. Manon believed it, but still didn't know what she was really expecting. How would her witchling's movements feel? And would Manon even know them? What if the baby had died in the womb? That would be nothing new in irontoothwitch pregnancies. 

"Whatever you're thinking," Asterin muttered from behind Manon as she started the massage again.“Stop right away. You and the witchling are perfectly fine."  

Manon didn't say anything. She tried to shake off doubts and fears and concentrate solely on enjoying the touch of Asterin's skilled hands. And those hands reminded Manon of some other hands. Hands that Manon hadn't agreed to think about. The cold phantom hands that tormented her. Warm, right hands that felt every point of her body. 

"When will I see you next time?"  

Dorian's voice rang in her mind, uninvited. There had been hope on the voice that Manon would return. And she was back. Once. But runaway. How long would Dorian wait before forgetting Manon? It would be better for Manon if Dorian forgot about her. Even if Manon could never forget, no matter how long she lived. 

Manon had thought a lot early in her pregnancy about what the little one would inherit from her and what she would inherit from Dorian. She had buried those thoughts in the same pit where she had buried everything else she didn't want to think. In the same pit were Manon's fears about the witchling's health, cruel memories, decisions, grandmother's reproaching voice, and Dorian's. Everything Manon didn't want to think about was stuffed into the back of her mind in the same place. And there they would also be allowed to stay. 

Manon woke up from her thoughts as the tent canvas opened up and Vesta slipped in, with Imogen at her heels. “A real blizzard is about to start there,” The first thing Imogen said was as she took off her hood. Her boots left snowy marks on the sandy floor of the cave. “We may have to dig our way out in the morning." 

"Luckily we have shovels then," Fallon muttered audibly. Vesta chuckled and dropped a large amount of firewood next to Sorrel. "You're welcome," Vesta said briskly, as she opened her own cloak and threw it over the robes of Edda and Briar. 

"How far did you have to go to get these trees?" Sorrel asked, examining the pile of thick branches. Imogen dumped her own cargo of wood next to Vesta's pile. “Watch out with those wood logs!" Sorrel exclaimed, leaping away, when the thick branches almost falling into her arms. 

Imogen muttered her apologies before threw her own cloak together with the others. Imogen had never been particularly social. She was comfortable on her own and spoke even less often than the Shadows, which said a lot. Imogen wandered quietly into the corner of the cave and went to sit next to Lin, who sharpened her knives. Imogen said nothing, but held out her hand to Lin demandingly. Lin glanced up once, met Imogen's gaze, handed her one of her grindstones. Imogen began working in the head bow, leaning against the wall next to Lin. 

Despite the fact that Manon often ordered Liln and Vesta to be paired while they were on guard, whether hunting, sparring or fighting, Lin had always seemed to get along best with Imogen. It wasn't the first time Manon wondered if there was something between them. 

Asterin, who seemed to be reading Manon's thoughts these days, bent down to say in a low voice in Manon's ear: "Lin treats Imogen like a little sister. I've always thought that Imogen might be the only one in the world who could call Lin by her real name and stay unharmed." 

Lin - Linnea, as her tender-hearted mother had named her, had always treated her name like a curse. Now Manon wondered if Lin would have been so disgusted with her name if her mother had raised her. Lin was raised by her grandmother, like Manon.Both of their mothers had died. Manon's mother on childbirth and Lin's mother - her mother was killed by Lin's own grandmother. 

Manon swallowed and lowered her head to look into her belly. A month had passed since the dream in which she saw her daughter, dressed in a black robe, bending over a wolf's steaming carcass. After that, the dreams had stopped, for which Manon was grateful. She didn't wake up early in the morning because of the raven's disturbing laughter. The morning sickness had also stopped, although Manon still couldn't stand the smell of meat. 

Manon's gaze wandered again to the corner where Imogen and Lin sharpened their weapons. Imogen was the youngest of her witches. She looked younger than most of the others. Because of immortality, they aged slowly. When the witch's menstruation began, the aging process also slowed down. Manon looked barely twenty years old. Asterin looked no older than her. 

Imogenia could have been imagined to be something between fourteen and seventeen. Two blond plaits only accentuated the impression. Maybe that's why Lin had a soft spot for her. Manon had learned that each of the thirteen members had a soft spot that they guarded as paranoidly as Manon the witchling growing in her belly. Lin's soft spot was Imogen. Lin, as well as Ghsilaine, looked like the elders of the Thirteen. In appearance, they were no more than twenty-six years old. 

"That would be it,” Ghislaine's satisfied voice made Manoni's gaze turn from the two towards the hot water pool. Ghislaine stood on its edge and leaned on one of the flanges they had acquired. 

"Can we take a bath?” Vesta got excited and stood up from her seat next to Sorrel, where she had remained to quench her hunger. “Not tonight," Ghislaine said, ignoring Vesta's sigh. “But tomorrow, if we get enough wood to heat the pool." 

"I'll carry the whole forest here, as long as I get one warm bath,” Vesta muttered. "I'll keep that in mind," Asterin said from behind Manon. "You can go get more firewood tomorrow." 

Vesta flashed Asterin an obscene hand gesture. Manon sighed and rolled her eyes. Although she was forced to admit that she would probably do the same if she could leave the cave without freezing to death. She pushed into her mouth the pastry she was holding in her hands and, as she chewed, watched as the twins tamped the stones as tightly ground as possible. There were only a couple of layers of sand before solid ground. All the leftover sand had been hurled out or piled up in one corner of the cave. 

Manon would bury Asterin there if she became too annoying. 

"How do you feel Manon?” Ghsilaine question caused Mano's wandering thoughts to focus again. "Make to the end the pool. We all need a proper bath." 

It wasn't a right answer, but Manon didn't know how to describe how she felt at the time. Ghsilaine did not press, although Manon's response clearly frustrated her. She turned towards her group and began to give instructions on how to build the ditches. She ordered Lin and Imogen to join her in diges the so Thea and Kaya could take a break. The twins also left the pit and Briar and Edda took their place. 

Manon watched it from a distance as she finally felt her back muscles relax. This time, she couldn't hold back the satisfied sigh that escaped her mouth. And again she felt as if the soft wing of a bird had rubbed her from the inside of her belly. 

Manon was sure it was due to hunger. 

::::::: 

The cave smelled of burning spruce and warming stone. It was well past noon. The snow shone in the light of the pale sun that had peeked from behind the clouds earlier in the day. 

Manon had visited the cave entrance in the morning to get some fresh air before Asterin had woken up. Cousin would have tried to persuade Manon to stay in the cave. Sorrel had stood guard and watched her as she stood breathing at the entrance of the cave. The air was cold and Mano's breath steamed in the freezing temperatures, but the cold air refreshed her senses. It stung her bare legs and made her toes numb. 

The touch of cold felt as refreshing as the song of the wind high above the treetops. To her surprise, Manon hadn't longed for the sky to ride on her broom, as much as she had imagined. Yes, she still heard the call of the wind. It whispered in the corners of the cave, but it was easy to resist the whiff of the wind. Manon was tied to the ground with growing belly. 

By the time Manon returned to the cave, Asterin was already awake. The worry on her face had disappeared when she saw Manon slip back into the cave from behind the tent canvas. Manon hadn't given Asterin a chance to say anything. She just walked past second and started rummaging through something to eat. 

The witches slowly woke up. They had begun to slip out of their normal circadian rhythm. Sometimes evenings and mornings stretched. Especially after Manon's sleep patterns had started to become more irregular. Some nights she fell asleep as soon as he laid her head on the pillow. Other nights she turning around on her pad for many hours, which kept the other Thirteen awake. The night before had been like that. Manon hadn't been able to sleep and eventually she had just given up. Thirteen had been sitting around the fire talking long into the night until Manon had almost fallen asleep. 

Manon didn't know if her witches had agreed among themselves, or if it was out of solidarity with her sleep problems, as no one agreed to go to bed before Manon. She hadn't asked, and no one had told her. 

There had been a time when such mornings would have yielded at least three whip blows. Grandmother would be furious to see what kind of state Manon and her dreaded coven had ended up in. They would have been accused of being lazy, stupid and a disgrace to the entire Blackbeak clan. 

But in the forest, hidden in a cave, it felt like a completely different world. It was perfectly normal to sleep here for a long time. And then go get firewood so that in the evening the whole coven could bathe in warm water for the first time in many months. 

Vesta, Lin and Imogen went to get wood. Asterin had smiled sunnily at Vesta's grumpy expression, reminding her that she had volunteered the night before. After the trio left, Manon had taken matters into her own hands and sent Asterin hunting with the twins. 

Asterin had resisted. Of course there was. But Manon hadn't given up. "You have to go out sometimes," she was grunted. "Go hunting or I'll bury you in that pile of hiccups." Manon had continued, pointing to a pile in one corner of the cave. Asterin had finally agreed, although she clearly did not like the order. 

Before the trio left, Manon muttered to the twins: “ Don't return until Asterin is relaxed."  

Faline had grinned knowingly and Fallon had chuckled. "We'll take her far, on a very long hunt." She promised. "And we won't return until Asterin has calmed down."  

"No human," Manon ordered. "Nothing that attracts extra attention."  

Fallon had looked annoyed and Faline's wicked grin was pouring from her face. The twins loved killing and draining human's carotid arteries. "Not even a little bite? Some hunter lost too deep in the woods?" Faline tried. Manon shook her head. "No humans."  

The twins exchanged glances, as if pondering how to contradict them. But then both sighed in submission. No matter how much things changed, Manon was still the leader of the Thirteen. “So game," Fallon said. "Some big moose, ” Faline suggested and her grin returned. Fallon grinned just as wildly. "Or a wolf. Something you can fight with a little bit."  

“Asterin, ” Manon said to her second, who attached a bow to her back. Asterin looked up, clearly hoping that Manon would let her stay. But Manon said: "Keep the twins in check. I don't want some Irontooth witch coven to find us because of them."  

Asterin looked discouraged, but nodded anyway. After they left, Ghislaine, Sorrel, Thea, Kaya, and Shadows remained in the cave. Thea, Sorrel and Briar dug the ditches around the basin under the guidance of Ghsilaine. Manon, together with Kaya and Edda, completed the tributary of the source and let the water drain into the pool. They made sure that the water was clean and passed effortlessly from a larger spring, along a small stream, to a basin of stones.The murmur of water filled the cave. The water was crystal clear and cold like snow-covered cliffs. 

Manon shivered as freezing water splashed down her legs. It tingled like glass as it dried. 

It took them all morning first digging, filling the pool, and then – when Vesta, Imogen and Lin returned – Pushing firewood into place. Manon sat on her pad and watched as her witches filled the ditches with an astronomically accurate formula. Each tree had to be in just the right place, Ghislaine enlightened. I wonder how many of the Thirteen secretly wished they could bury Ghislaine in a pile her sand in the corner, Manon wondered, chewing on her apple. 

When Ghislaine was satisfied with the placement of the trees, she poured clear liquor over the trees, which Vesta had brought from the village at Ghislaine's request. Then the trees were lit. The fire immediately flared, and the cave was filled with the smell of smoke and burnt wood. Through a wall of sand gathered around the pool, which was to be shoveled back over the fire when the water warmed up enough, and Manon did not see any flames. Even if she heard them. Ghsilaine closed the mouth of a small new mountain stream and the water stopped coming into the pool. 

“What now?" Vesta asked, the light of the flames reflected in the black eyes. "Now," Ghislaine said calmly. "We're waiting." 

And so they waited. Manon dozed off the rest of the morning top her sleeping bag, listening to the flames singing a few feet away. She was comfortably warm. At the same time, other witches complained about the heat. 

Asterin and the twins returned in the evening, when the fire had already burned for a good time and had already begun to subside. Ghislaine had announced, after testing the water temperature with her hand, that they could bathe after the evening meal. The moose felled by Asterin and the twins was welcomed with satisfaction. They had cooked it outside, despite the increased wind and the snowfall that had begun. 

The smell of fried, warm meat raised bile in Manon's throat. She was forced to swallow it and concentrate only on her own food. Apples, bread and a little more apples. Which Manon was still not tired of. The witches attacked the moose like a pack of hungry wolves after working all day. The atmosphere in the cave was relaxed and hilarious. 

Somehow, the promise of a warm bath had lifted the spirits of her entire coven. Despite being witches, they also craved fun and relaxation from time to time, Manon thought. And it didn't always mean sleep with men. A prince buried in Manon's mind tried to steal her attention, but Manon resolutely pushed her back into the pile of sand in her mind. Dorian would be allowed to stay there. 

The ditches had been filled and the warmth from the bath sent shivers of excitement down Manon's spine. The water was still crystal clear and fresh, but now it was warm as if the sun had been pouring into it all day. 

There was a rustling of clothes as the witches of the Thirteen undressed. Manon pulled her pregnancy dress over her head, revealing her changed figure. Manon was amazed at how... Her body looked soft. Because of her freezing, Manon hadn't really undressed and explored her body altered by pregnancy. 

What used to be sharp, hard, and mere of muscle was now soft and round. Swollen belly and grown breasts. Manon didn't know what to think. Should her belly be this big by now? 

"You're going to be huge in late pregnancy," Aster said quietly. Manon looked up and saw her cousin standing in front of her, still wearing a white undershirt. Manon realized that this may have been Asterin's first time in eighty years, when she was naked in front of her entire coven. 

When the mark that her grandmother had burned on her lower abdomen would be there for all to see. "Are you ready?" Manon asked, her voice softening. "No one will judge you if you don't want to..." 

"They know about the brand," Aster said. “They know what your grandmother did to me," she continued, fiddling with the hem of her shirt in her hand. Manon was silent. She didn't know what to say to Asterin. Manon could only watch as Asterin grabbed the hem of her shirt and pulled it over his head. The word burned in the lower abdomen was worse than Manon remembered. 

And it stirred up a fury inside her. How many other Blackbeak carried the same brand without Manon's knowledge? How many other witches had been deprived by the Matron of the opportunity to hold her child in her arms? Even once? 

A sharp breath from behind Manon made her avert her gaze. Ghsilaise's eyes were wide as she stared at the word burned into Asterin's stomach. And then, tears welled up in the dark-skinned witch's eyes. She averted her gaze and wiped her eyes. 

The cruelty of the word seemed too much even for the Thirteen, who had seen many killing grounds. When Manon averted her gaze from Ghsilaine, she saw the gazes of the other witches lingering on Asterin's lower abdomen. Manon looked at each of them closely, ready to attack any of them at the slightest sign that one of the Thirteen was feeling disgusted. 

But when Manon looked at the expressions of Thirteen, all she saw was sadness and rage mixed on her witches' faces. They all knew who had burned the word "Unclean" into Asterin's skin. 

"When you tear her throat open, I want to be there to see,” Lin's quiet voice broke the deep silence of the cave. The corners of Asterin's mouth jerked upwards, and Manon saw how much Asterin appreciated those words. How much she appreciated their understanding and loyalty. 

"The day of the matron are numbered," Manon said. One by one, she met the gaze of each of the thirteen. Her gaze stopped at Asterin. “We take revenge for every mother who lost her witchling to the Matron." 

Asterin's eyes gleamed. She took a shakin breath and then held out her hand to Manon. "In anticipation of that day, we could use this hot water pool to our advantage." 

Manon couldn't help the chuckle that escaped her mouth. She let Asterin grab her hand and help her into warm water. The warmth of the water was like healing balm to Manon's cold muscles and limbs. Asterin next to her closed her eyes with a satisfied look, while Vesta sighed in pleasure as she sank into the water. 

Similar sighs came out of the mouths of many other witches as their skin met the heat of the water. “That's why it was worth working," Faline or Fallon said. The twins sat next to each other opposite Manon. Their hair cascaded in black waves into the water and floated around them like aquatic plants. Manon couldn't tell the twins apart at that moment. 

Thea and Kaya sat next to the twins. Their hands kept getting lost caressing each other's bare legs and breasts. "You're not doing that here," Vesta grumbled beside Sorrel. "I can already smell your arousal." 

Thea and Kaya grinned maliciously at each other, but pleased Vesta and tried to keep their hands apart. Next to Thea and Kaya was Imogen, opening her shaggy plait hair. One by one, the pale strands fell free and remained floating in the water like golden blades of grass. 

Between Imogen and Asterin sat Ghsilaine, with her eyes closed and a smug little smile on her face. She could not be reproached for it. She had succeeded perfectly in her goal. 

On the other side of Mano sat Sorrel, whose watchful gaze was clouded as she surrendered to the warmth of the water. She absentmindedly wiggled her fingers in the water, watching the shivers she had caused on the surface of the water. 

Next to Sorrel was Vesta, whose red hair spilled into the water, like a bloody waterfall. Her large, pale breasts were only partially submerged in water, for she had hunched her back in an enjoyable stretch. Next to Vesta was Lin, rubbing her hands together, trying to wash away the pine resin that had stuck to her hands. 

Then there were the Shadows. A black cloud spread the Edda's black hair – which had been redyed a couple of days ago – into the water. Briar's hair also shed color. The last remnants of black hair color disappeared when Briar submerged her head in water. A silvery grey patch spilled around her hair, when she lifted his head out of the water and wiggled her hair on her back, splashing bath water on Edda and the other twin. 

"Watch out a little!" Edda yelp and jumped away from her cousin, who grinned and splashed more water on the Edda. Like children, Manon thought, as she watched Edda retaliate by splashing water on Briar. Briar dodged by turning her head, only to receive a blow from the other side. Faline – Manon was pretty sure of that—smiling smugly as Briar startle and rubbed her wet face with her hands. 

Vesta laughed at it and Ghsilaine sighed in frustration. "How old are you?" she groaned out half aloud, letting her body sink deeper into the water. Manon thought she should have reproached her witches' because of childish behavior, but at that moment she couldn't care less. 

Manon closed her eyes and pressed her back against the warm stones of the pool. Their warmth radiated to her body like the heat of a fireplace. It was heavenly. Manon's every muscle relaxed when, like Ghsilaine, let her whole body sink into the water. 

And then her relaxation was broken by a strange feeling in her belly. Soft wing beat on the inside of the abdomen. Manon sighed and changed positions. The feeling came again, as if a bird's wing had touched her from the inside. Manon groaned and changed positions again. The feeling wasn't exactly uncomfortable, but it made the hairs on Manon's neck stand up. The same strange feeling had come to Manon several times during the last few days. It's like there's a bird spreading its wings in her belly. 

Manon's eyes opened when the thought entered her mind. Once again, she felt as if a wing had rubbed against her belly from the inside. Delicate, small touch. Movement in her... movement in her womb. 

Manon bounced into a sitting position so that the water splashed. "What?" Asterin was immediately alert. Manon couldn't hear her properly. Her ears were buzzing. A new touch of the wing, as if ensuring everything. 

Slowly, as if afraid of what she would feel, Manon laid her hand on her bulging belly. She moved it gently, trying to feel something. And that was it. A slight shiver as her hand touched her lower abdomen. Gentle touch of the bird's wing. 

“Manon,” Asterin's hand landed on her shoulder. “Manon! What now? Are you okay?" 

Okey? All is okay! Manon felt her child's movements. She felt the witchling move inside her. Manon's mouth opened as she gasped for breath, trying to get enough oxygen to her brain. “I can feel her movements," Manon said in a choked voice. "I feel her movement!" 

Saying it out loud, it felt like a heavy weight had fallen off Manon's shoulders. The child was fine and moving. The witchling was alive and Manon felt her little body move inside her. No longer just a state of being. The witchling was alive and real and...Manon felt a new movement within her. The little one heard her and moved, as if trying to get Manon's attention.  I notice you, Manon was tempted to shout out. I notice you!  

You are true. You're alive.  Manon wanted to say it all, but couldn't. When she opened her mouth, a sob erupted instead of words. Manon took a breath. Tried to stop sobbing, but all she could get was to cry out. Tears welled up in her eyes and fell down her cheeks. A new movement inside her. It was as if the witchling sensed Manon's mentalbrokedown and tried to comfort her. 

It only made Manon's crying worse. She sobbed and gasped for breath, tears rolling down her cheeks. She curled up in a heap. Wrapped her arms around her as strong sobs passed through her. 

Manon had never cried. Not from pain, sadness or rage. And she could never have imagined having a hysterics fit of pure joy. Knowing that she hadn't failed. The child continued to move inside her, reacting to Manon's loud sobbings. Still so small, but with more sense of intelligence than Manon had ever had. 

The soft touch made Manon look up from her belly, which he had been staring at. She felt like she had never seen it properly before. Hadn't figured out what it meant to carry a child. Asterin had slid beside her. 

The cousin smiled. There was a wide, gentle smile on her face. There were tears in her eyes. "She's fine, Manon. Healthy and strong." 

Manon couldn't help but nod. The touch of Asterin's hands was gentle as she pulled Manon into a hug, as she did in her tent after her nightmare. 

And Manon let her do so. She let Asterin pull her into his arms and hug her tightly. Manon sighed with a shudder. The tears did not stop. The witch child kept moving. Manon continued her hysterical sobbing. 

She felt the other witches around her moving. She felt their every touch. Gentle and comforting. Manon's crying only got worse. It was as if all the anxiety, fear, joy and frustration that had been packed in the last few months were now unraveling all at once. 

"When will I see you next time?"  

Dorian's last question whispered in her mind. And now Manon whispered his silent response. 

"Maybe one day I'll be brave enough coming back."  

Thirteen let Manon weep. Let her vent all her emotions into tears. Their presence meant more to Manon than she could ever say. 

"Look what you're doing for us,"  Manon said quietly to the girl who was lingering at the limits of her consciousness. Existed only in her head. Black hair, a different pair of eyes and quiet hoarfrost laughter. "Look what you've done to me."  

As always, the girl laughed. "And don't you love every second?"  

More than Manon could ever comprehend. 

::::::: 

The freezing temperatures in midwinter made Aster's Blackbeak shiver despite her thick clothes. She stood in front of the cave frying that morning's booty. Eight large fish ripened over an open fire under a small cliff ledge. Thirteen tried to fry their food in daylight, when smoke might not be as easily distinguished. 

Asterin couldn't claim to enjoy fishing. She had spent half a day ice fishing on the ice of the river, with Vesta by her side. They had changed shifts whenever the other's fingers were almost frozen in the fishing rod. 

Manon had still been in a deep sleep when Asterin had left. Her belly was already so big that she couldn't close her sleeping bag. Manon had slept under her sleeping bag like it’s a blanket. Her hand had supported her large belly underneath, protectively as if afraid her daughter would run away. And Asterin hadn't wondered about it at all. Manon was now on the sixth moon. There were just under three months left before the witchling was born. The little one kicked Manon almost day and night, and Manon had stated one day that his daughter was trying to escape from the womb. 

Still not born and already causing headaches. Asterin thought that Manon's daughter would be one of those children who learned to run as soon as they learned to crawl. It would be difficult to watch her. 

Asterin had never seen Manon so tired. Under her eyes were shadows of long-awake nights when the witchling did not stop kicking. The girl calmed down only as Manon spoke, and resumed as soon as Manon finished. Despite the fact that Manon complained most of the time about how she could not sleep because of the little one, Asterin had seen the joy on Manon's face every time the witchling moved. 

Manon was more exhausted than ever, but at the same time she was happier than Asterin thought possible. The pregnancy had softened Manon's inherent cruelty and turned it into irritability. And Manon, irritated and complaining to her belly, was an endearing sight. 

But every time Asterin looked at Manon and her swollen belly, he couldn't help her old grief. She herself remembered how the child's movements had felt. Her daughter had not tried to escape. Instead, she teased Asterin. Sometimes he had been motionless for long periods of time, so that Asterin became worried. And then she kicked a couple of times hard, as if announcing:  “Here I’m. Don't think you'll get rid of me so easily."  

Asterin remembered how much he had loved her daughter's every move. How much vitality she had felt in her daughter. And how painful it had been to realize that she would never get to see her witchling grow up. How final that silence had sounded in the tower room. Asterin would have liked to see her at least once. Holds her daughter at least once. But the Matron had deprived her of it. 

Asterin had had to watch her daughter burn to ashes in the flames of the fireplace. It hurt even more than the letters burned in her belly. 

It should never happen to Manon. Asterin did not allow that to happen to Manon. Ever. Silent footsteps awakened Asterin from her thoughts. When she looked up from the fishes, she saw Sorrel who had slipped out of the cave. Her dark hair was still messed up after sleep, and there was a worried look in her eyes. 

Asterin knew immediately that something was wrong. She turned all the way towards the triplet of her coven and asked. "What?" 

Sorrel swallowed. There was a worried wrinkle on her forehead. “It's Manon," said the triplet in a tense voice. Asterin's posture straightened immediately. "Tell me!" 

Sorrel's dark eyes met Asterin's burning gaze. “She's still asleep and we can't get her awake and..." Sorrel swallowed. In that moment, Asterin knew something was horribly wrong. "Is Manon okay?" Aster's question was barely heard. It was so quiet, strangled by panic. 

From Sorrel's face - a stony, serious face - shone pure worry. "Manon has a fever."