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Chapter Text

"SHIT!" I yelled, getting blasted three feet back before something vibrated in my pocket. My phone's on auto-answer, so, it answered. "Hi, Zatanna here."

"Hello, Ms. Zatara." Damn it, what'd my kid do this time?! An explosion went off. "I'm sorry, Miss, was that an explosion?" My daughter's principal asked. "So sorry, Principal Jackson, there's a bunch of construction workers near my workspace."

"Well, Ms. Zatara, your daughter is currently in my office right now."

"Could-could you call Sabrina's father instead? I'm having a bit of a work emergency right now," I requested as another rein of fire rained down on me and the team I was dispatched with. "You're seriously—"

I hung up and shot another blast of magic at the villain we were fighting, and called John.

~John's PoV~

"Bollocks. In what bloody plane of existence does four of a kind lose?"

"Too, too, bad, Constantine," Abnegazar said mockingly.

My phone rang. Oh, perfect bloody timing!

I glanced down, and it was Zee.

She's supposed to be on a Justice League mission right now, what the hell?

"Hold on a tick, mates, I gotta take this, it shouldn't be long, it's my wife. I don't answer, I'm getting a serious hex to the face when I get home. If you'll excuse me." I took my phone out and walked out of the room. "Ey, Love, what is it?" I asked, answering the call. "So, I'm on a JL mission, you know that, but, Brina also got into some trouble at school, I don't know what, but, I couldn't take it. You busy?"

"Nothin' out of the ordinary, in the middle of playin' poker with some of my old demon mates."

"Well, I'm sorry, you need to leave that, right now, and go to Brina's school. She got into some trouble th— SHIT, TSALB!"

"You alright, Zee?"

I love this woman to death, but, I'd be lying if I said I loved the fact she goes out and risks her life every day.

Every time she goes out there, I'm worried that she won't come back.

"Bit occupied at the moment. I can't handle being a parent right now, especially with Sabrina's tendencies, thanks to you, so... you got this?"

"Sure."

"Thank you so much. I'll cover next time." I laughed. "Like that's any promise, Love. Said that the last three times."

Another explosion went off. "I gotta go. Laurel needs my help. See you at home, John. I love you."

"You too, Zee." The line clicked off, and not a second later, another call came in. "Alright, well, this is where I say goodbye, see you lot later." I opened a portal and almost stepped through it before quietly muttering a spell and teleporting the money everyone else had into my coat and checking my phone. Yeah, it's her school. "Yo, Constantine here."

"Hello, Mr. Constantine," she greeted. God, I hate this bitch. "What'd my girl get into this time?"

"Best that you come in person."

"Great. I'll be right there." I opened a portal around a block away from the school and walked in after a few minutes. The bird at the front desk gave me a dirty look, like usual. Shit, I should probably put my cigarette out. Right. I rapped on the door a few times after putting the one I had in my mouth out and into my pocket. "Come in," she called. I walked in, and saw my daughter in all of her raven-black-dyed-hair glory and another girl sitting there. “Alright, Sabrina, what'd you get into this ti—... oh, damn, bloody hell, what happened to you, Love?" I asked the other person sitting there, seeing her bruised up and beat to a pulp. "Your daughter happened," Principal Bitch informed. I laughed. "What happened, in detail? C'mon, I'm gonna need some details."

"Well, your fabulous eleven-year-old daughter started cursing Karen out during lunch and then they got into a fight."

I scoffed. "Some fight. Lemme guess, Brina won? Cos, my girl doesn't got a scratch on 'er, an’ the other girl looks like someone decided to stick her arse in Hell for a hot minute.” Principal Bitch fake-cleared her throat. "Not helping, sir."

"Yeah, yeah. What's Sabrina's punishment or what bloody ever? Cause, I've got a few things to do, so, Love, I don't really got the time to deal with this rubbish."

"Could you- could you please refrain from using those words, please, sir?"

"What, last time I checked, none of those words are bloody curse words, Love."

"This," she sighed. "Is exactly why I called your wife  first." Sabrina rolled her eyes and blew a piece of her black-dyed hair out of her face over to the side with the rest of it. "Dad, I didn't start the bloody fight, for God's sake!"

"Well, sunshine, what happened, then? Why you walkin' round without a scratch and she looks like she went through Hell?" I questioned. "This minger 'ere decided to insult what you an' Mum do for a livin'! Absolute wanker, pickin' a fight with me! She can go eat a fuckin' dick for all I care."

Oh, my God.

She really is my daughter.

Crap, I'm supposed to be a parent right now.

"Brina, hon, we don't use those types of words," I reminded gently. Usually, Zee handles this sort of stuff. How the hell am I supposed to do this shite?! "Dad, you say that and much, much worse in the span of one hour, at your friends and at your pack of cigarettes. You’ve cursed Uncle Jason out more times than I can count. Hell, I've heard you call Gramps a, let's see... “a barmy, off-his-rocker, good for nothing prat that doesn't know what's good for his daughter and should go rot in the pits of Hell”, right? And you’re supposed to be the role model here?" That was one time, I swear to God. And he totally deserved it that time. The bloke said that I’m some drunk arsehole conman off the corner of England and that Zee shouldn’t have anything to do with me. He’s not wrong, of course, but, still hurts to hear it. Also kicked him outta the house after that. Let’s just say Zee wasn’t happy with me. “That's besides the point, Love."

"S-Sabrina Constantine-Zatara!" Principal Bitch stuttered. I just smirked at that one. "We never use those types of words at school! Never!"

"Well, Principal Jackson, feel free to explain that to Karen fucking Jones. She's the one who called my Mum a parlor illusionist bitch an' my Dad a drunk arsehole! She's also the one who tried to kick me first." She paused to laugh. "She kicks like a bloody wuss. Robin fights better, an' the bloke's nine for God's bloody sake."

Sabrina turned to Karen, I guess. "Don't pick your fights if you can't win 'em, Love."

"Sir, you're just going to let her get away with talking like this?!"

I chuckled. "Just be glad she ain't cussin' you out, Love. Cos, I know I would at her age."

"Once again, this is exactly why I reach out to Ms. Zatara first rather than you."

"Don't exactly blame ya. I would. Zee's ten times the parent I ever will be."

"She's also the one who seems to be working more," Principal Bitch commented. I don't even know her name. What's her bloody name again? Johnson? Jefferson? Jackson? Yeah, that's it.

Not my fault I face off with a million different wankers that I need to remember to the t in order to banish their arses down to hell.

"Well, she can't bloody well drop out of a show to come whenever Brina gets into trouble for standing her ground," I defended. "She was not standing her ground, she was straight-up assaulting Miss Jones!" Principal Bitch insisted. "What say you, then? Huh? Did you or my girl throw the first blow? Answer me, come on," I urged the other girl. She muttered something under her breath. "Sorry, what was that? Speak up, would you?"

"You act more immature than most of the students here, Mr. Constantine. No wonder Sabrina is such a troublemaker."

I scoffed. "You got a problem with me, sunshine, please do not hesitate to curse me out."

"Oh, I have multiple problems with you, Mr. Constantine. The fact that you allow your daughter to talk like that in front of you is astonishing."

"Well, I was pretty much cursin' twits off the street out when I was around seven, so, she's doin' better than I was at her age."

"How you ended up married to that perfect role model of a woman is beyond me."

"Crazy, init? How'd a bastard like me end up with Zatanna for a wife? Might be my accent, most likely the way I shag, I'll never bloody know, all I know is that we have a kickass, beautiful daughter that doesn't go around socking people in the face for no reason. So, whatever reason my girl had for beating the living daylight out of Karen, sorry that's your name, by the way, was a very, very, valid one."

A few seconds later, the goddess I was married to walked through the door. God, I love her. Even when she's not in that stage outfit that makes me so hard, she's an Angel. "'Ello, Love. Got off of work early?"

"Yeah. Seems like I chose correctly."

~Zee's PoV, a few minutes earlier~

"Alright, I sent John over to Sabrina's school to deal with some trouble she got herself into, let's finish this up quickly so I can get over there and calm down whatever John just escalated."

"That's the tenth time this month, Zee. Sabrina seems like a problem child," Laurel commented before blasting someone back with her cry right behind me. "Well, she isJohn's kid, with most of his... qualities, so, I don't really know what else I was expecting from her."

Five minutes later, we were done.

I need to get over there.

"Good work, team. Zatanna, you need to go?"

"Yeah. Thanks."

I opened a portal and hopped through, changing mid-port into my street clothes, black leggings, a white top, and a black jacket. I walked up to the front desk. "Hi, Zatanna Zata—" I started. "Zatanna Zatara, another of Sabrina Constantine-Zatara, the infamous troublemaker. She's waiting in Principal Jackson's office, along with that child of a husband you have that just seems to make things worse."

"Thanks." It alarms me thst I don't even have to check in with he front desk people for them to recognize me. "Sorry that's your name, by the way, was a very, very valid one," I heard through the door. Oh, shit. John's gonna get her expelled or something. I walked in shortly after. "'Ello, Love. Got off work early?" He asked. "Yeah. Seems like I chose correctly," I responded before turning to Sabrina. "Alright, Brina, what did you do this time?"

"Look at Miss Jones's face," Principal Jackson stated. Oh, my God. Well, at least Sara's training her well for hand-to-hand. I glanced over at my girl. Not a scratch.

I had to stifle a laugh at that. "Alright, what happened?"

"You really didn't have to call my mum in," Sabrina insisted with a tone of voice that's bound to get her in trouble sooner or later. "Sabrina. What. Happened,” I repeated. "Nothin', this wanker 'ere just decided to insult what you and Dad do for a livin'!" Sabrina insisted. "Alright, Brina, take a deep breath, just calm down. You're not in trouble, I just want to know what happened."

"I'll tell you what happened, Ms. Zatara. Your daughter started cursing Miss Jones here out and ended up picking a fight with her," Principal Jackson answered. Not like I wanted her opinion on what happened.

"And I'm tellin' you, this bloody git here threw the first kick at me! Not that it hurt, but, I was jus' using what Auntie Sara taught me!" Sabrina insisted.

"What your Godmother taught you is for self-defense only, young lady, not for school fights, which you shouldn't even be getting into in the first place," I scolded.

"Now that is what a parent is supposed to do."

"Zee—" my husband started. "Not now, John," I snapped, cutting him off. "Sabrina, why did you do this?" I asked. "You're not in trouble, I just want to know," I clarified. "This prat here," Sabrina motioned to Karen. "Called you a parlor illusionist bitch an' Dad a drunk arsehole."

"Well, while both are true for your father at most times," I shot him a glare. "How you handled things were not the correct way to handle that."

"But you said that you should be proud of what you do, what our family does."

"That does not apply for school. When you're in school, someone makes fun of what your parents do, you take it. That's all. Okay?"

"Alright, Zee, I'm gonna regret this later, but, I'm disagreeing with you on that. Someone badmouths your folks, I say talk back to the git who apparently has a death wish. God knows you were like that in high school,” John argued.

"Me in high school is different from Sabrina in middle school. And you need to watch your language around Sabrina and Robin," I added. "I do, for God's sake!"

"Then where does your daughter learn words like prat, bastard, git, wanker, minger, oh, and she said that Miss Jones could, and I quote, "eat a fuckin' dick". So, if you watch your language, Mr. Constantine, explain where your daughter learns words like that?"

"Million other places she could've picked those words up, Love. Hell, she probably picked em up from this barmy chav, she called me an arsehole, didn't she?" John asked. "I'm so sorry. I will talk with both my husband and my daughter."

"What?! Why am I getting in trouble?! Dad cusses Gramps out all the bloody time, and you're completely fine with that?! But when I call her some colorful nicknames because she decided to insult what the two of you do for a living, you wanna ground me? Mum, Dad says this sort of stuff an' more on a regular basis!" Sabrina argued. The joys of having Constantine for a husband and having a kid with his personality. The bell rang. "Principal Jackson, I am so, so sorry for my daughter's behavior. I promise to talk with both of them."

"Once bloody again, why do I have t' get in trouble for this?!"

"Oh, I don't know, maybe because you beat up a classmate at school?! I'm grateful that you defended our name, but—"

"Really, Mum? Cos, right now, it seems like you would've preferred if I just let this prat walk all over me and shit on both of your guys's names!"

My God, she really is John's daughter.

I sighed. "Sabrina Constantine-Zatara, this is the tenth time this month, and it's not even the second week in! Let's go. You are in so much trouble when we arrive back home." We walked to the alley on the side of the school and I teleported us home back to Shadowcrest. My girl is in... so much trouble.

Chapter Text

"Young lady, you are in so much trouble," I scolded, holding both John and Sabrina's arms as I teleported us back to Shadowcrest. "Again?" Robin asked, an eyebrow raised, looking up from his textbook.

"Mummy, what'd Bri Bri get into this time?" My youngest daughter asked. "Nothing, honey. Your sister just got a little sidetracked during an assignment with Daddy." John took that opportunity to try and run away to our room. "Oh, no, you're not getting out of this one, Johnny. I might love you to death and willing to take a few talk-to's for, but, you are not getting out of this one."

"Now, now, Love, let's not be hasty."

"Save the sweet-talking for the demons, babe. Niarster," I chanted before turning to my youngest daughter. "Allison, sweetie, can you go to your room, please?" I asked. "Mommy needs to talk with your sister and your daddy." She nodded her head. "Okay!" She ran to her room. She's so sweet, so innocent.

I hope she won't have our powers.

Or, at least, not have them surface until after she's ready.

"Lecnac," I stated, canceling the spell. "Hey, Love, let's talk this out, yeah?"

"Like I said, save the sweet-talking for the demons. And, besides, don't act like I can't feel your little charm spell that you cast while I teleported us here. You should know after last time that doesn't work on me."

"Bollocks," John muttered. I rolled my eyes. "Nefaed," I muttered, creating a deafening spell around Allison's room. This is gonna get nasty, and she shouldn't have to hear me cursing John out. "Alright, now, who's brilliant idea was it to throw everything sideways like that?! You two should have had that mission! It was a simple information extraction! Get in, get out. But, no, you two had to throw shit to hell! Both of you almost died!"

"Blame Dad," Sabrina said off-handedly, and John shot her a glare in return. "Scuse me, Brina, that's not how—"

"I'm a thousand times more scared of Mum then I am of you, an' no way am I getting busted for lying. Plus, it really was your fault."

John opened his mouth to bite back, but then just closed it. I scoffed. "Of fucking course it's your fault. You almost got our daughter killed, John! Why I even married you, let alone raised three fucking kids with you is beyond me."

"Well, Love, it pr—" he started. "Shut up, I don't want to hear it right now, John," I snapped, cutting him off. "What the hell happened on that mission?"

"What mission were you two even on in the first place?" Robin asked. "Your father was tasked with retrieving a piece of information from Midnite."

"Already told Batsy that was a bad idea sendin' me, 'ver there before I sent off to the bloody bar the bloke has," John argued. "That's why you brought Sabrina, was it not? Next thing I fucking know, I'm getting an emergency notification at the base from your location! I go over there, and what the hell do I find?! Not one, but two members of my family surrounded by demons and monsters alike, both of which weren't even supposed to be on the recon mission in the first fucking place!"

"Well, for fuck's sake, you had me on the mission, going to an old enemy of mine, what else do you think would happen?! An' with Sabrina on there with me, well, Love, that makes it ten times worse!"

"And who's fault is that, John? Had you watched how you acted, had you not taught the poor girl that demons and monsters were real when she was six, and had you fucking not have been a better role model for our daughter, we wouldn't be in this position where my family is nearly getting killed every two seconds!" I yelled, slightly levitating off of the ground and extra magic flowing through my hands. "Mum! Calm down," Sabrina said, placing her hand in mine.

I couldn't explain it, but, whatever she tried doing didn't work.

"Mummy? Mummy! Daddy, what's going on with Mum?!"

"Ally, I don't know. She hasn't lost control in years, let alone anything of this magnitude."

"Well, do something, Dad!" Robin yelled.

"You made the wrong decision," a voice said in my head.

No.

"You're weak. Your husband doesn't love you, your children, a disgrace."

No.

"You shouldn't be twelve feet near a child, let alone three."

No!

"Love," I heard. "Sweetheart, come back. Please. Kids, get to Sabrina's room, she has protective wards around her room."

"What's happening, Daddy?!"

"Brina, get your sister and your brother into your room, now!" Someone yelled. "Hon, listen to me, whatever spell's got you under control, just please, snap the bloody hell out of it! I love you, alright? I don't say it nearly enough, and you know how badly I don't want to use magic on you, but, you don't get this shite under control, well, I'll be forced to!"

The magic below me turned blue, and I started seeing things before my eyes.

My daughter's body, bloody and lifeless.

My son's, mauled so much, nearly unrecognizable.

Allison's body...

No...

She's just a child...

NO!

"Et nomen Ioannes Constantinus me adducere et magistra Magia, Zatanna Zatara, rursus in potestate!" I heard yelled. Before the spell kicked into place, I saw a face I haven't in a long while.

Nick.

The last time I saw him...

"Zee, wake up, John's already, we're so close, I know we are!"

"Nicolas fucking Necro, it is three in the fucking morning, either fuck me or go to sleep, for God's sake."

"Sleep and sex can wait, Zee. This can't. We're so close to finally finding the books!"

"It has been a good five years since you started searching for these damn books with me and John, Nick. I'm starting to think that they're not real."

His hands, pressed against my neck. "Don't. You dare. Ever say that again. Now, get up, and cover up for God's sake. We've got a relic to snatch."

An hour later, I'm stuck in some shady alleyway and a giant rune on the floor. "Zee, trust me. Use this," he tossed a knife to me. "To cut some blood in here. That should bring the books to us."

"I don't know about this, Nick... anytime I've used my blood in... well, anything, it didn't end well."

"Will you just stop talking back to me and do as I say?!"

Rising flames.

"Nick, what's happening?!"

"They're real. Now, I have all the power I could think of!"

"It's gonna be no use if you die!"

"Shut up, Zatanna! You don't know what it's like to want power, but not be able to have it! You were born the daughter of one of the strongest mages in the history of the world, and what do you fucking do with those powers, become a stupid stage magician and waste your life with that sorry excuse of a warlock, and an even more sorry excuse of a human, Constantine!"

"Nick, wh-"

"Take them."

"NICK!"

"I'm coming for you, Zee."

I was pulled out of my power surge and dropped down onto my knees.

"Love," John whispered. "John," I breathed before he held me in his arms. I started to cry. "Love, love, it's okay, hey, it's alright... what happened? What'd you see?" He asked. "Nick," I breathed.

"Nick Necro?" He confirmed, his skin turning a shade paler. "I'm- I'm sorry, John. I need to go and talk with the kids."

"They're in-"

"Brina's room, I know." I knocked on my daughter's door. "Brina, Robin, Ally, can I come in, please?" I asked. I heard a solid "Yes" from the other side of the door, and I walked in. "Hey, kids."

"Mum, are you alright?" Sabrina asked. "Fine. Just... lost control a bit there," I lied. They don't know about Nick, and I was hoping they wouldn't ever have to find out. "You're lying," Robin said. "Yeah, you are, aren't ya? You saw somethin', didn't you, Mum?" I glared at both of them. "Allison," I reminded. "Right. 'Ey, Ally, can you go to the other room an' play with your dolls or whatever you do?"

"Why? What's- is Mummy alright?" Allison asked. "I'm fine, sweetie. Just go to the other room, okay?" She walked out of the room. "Oh, and get your father, too." John walked in a few minutes later. "Love, you alright?"

"Mhm."

"What'd you see when you lost control, Mum?" Sabrina asked. I glanced over at John. "It could be nothing," I pointed out. "Could be everythin', Love. It's high-time we tell them, regardless."

"But, Sabrina..."

"Love."

"Alright, you win. When your father and I were younger, we met a man, and his name was Nick Necro," I said, breaking the spell I cast on Sabrina since she was seven. "What did you do, Mom?" Robin asked. "I erased Nick from Sabrina's memory," I answered. "What'd he do?"

"Almost killed all three of us. Multiple times."

It was true.

Hell, it took every fiber in my being to not take us out of our lives the first time he tried to get me to do a blood sacrifice.

But, when he tried sacrificing my daughter to get more power in some summoning ritual, that was the last straw.

There was a reason I never told him about Robin.

And thank God I didn't.

"What the bloody hell?!" Sabrina yelled. "Sabrina-" I started before she straight-up punched me in the face. I breathed in pain through gritted teeth, wincing. "Ow. I know you're pissed at me, but, that does not give you the excuse to punch your mom in the face, for God's sake!"

I love Sara, but, she trained Sabrina a little bit too well.

"You erased someone from my memory?! I loved him! Nick was a better father to me than my own dad was! Dad was passed out drunk on the bloody couch, an' guess who helped me with my school projects? Uncle Nick! You couldn't be bothered to take care of me, either, you were too busy doing a show or playin' round with the League!"

"He almost killed me at least three times. He almost killed your father at least twice. And don't even get me started how many times he hurt me. He might've been a better father to you than John, but, I would pick your father over him any day of the week. At least your father doesn't beat me everytime I disagree over him or tell him that something's a lost cause. Also, can I just remind you that we were twenty when we started running around with him? We didn't know what to do with a normal kid, let alone a magical baby. Look, Sabrina, it was the only way we could ensure that you would be safe from him."

"What about Robin, then?" She asked. "We didn't tell him about your brother, honey. Or Alyson. We left by the time you were seven. Robin lived with your grandfather. I knew it wasn't safe to let him know that we had another child. You have to understand, he tried to use you in a summoning ritual to draw out a demon to gain more power. I don't know why we didn't leave him before, but, we didn't."

"Learned quite a bit from the bastard, that's why."

"You would've nicked that information regardless," I pointed out. "And having information is not as valuable as Sabrina."

"Point is, we are just telling you this because there is a slight chance that we are in danger. With all hope, he can't find us, there's no danger, and whatever little mind-spaz thing I just had meant nothing."

"Wait, so, what was he to you two?" Robin asked. "Our boyfriend," both John and I answered. "It's late. We should all try to get some sleep." The two of us walked into our room, and before long, we were laying next to each other in bed. "I'm scared," I confessed. "Love, we've went up against all sorts of nasty bastards, this one's no different."

"I don't know, John... this seems different. The fact that he almost killed our girl is scary."

"Love, they'll be fine."

"Allyson," I started protesting. "Will stay on the Waverider with Sara an' Zari. They'll take care of 'er until we get back."

"I don't know, John..."

"Our kids are strong."

~Sabrina's PoV~

I was teleported into someplace that was oddly familiar. "Hello?"

"Hello, Bri."

"Uncle Nick!"

Oh, my Gosh.

He's here.

"C'mere, kid." He opened his arms, waiting for a hug. "How's life treatin' ya?"

There's no way he's as evil as Mum and Dad say.

No way.

The same man that helped me with school work and made me dinner when my parents couldn't be bothered to can't be the same man who harmed my mother and almost killed both of them.

There's no way.

"I'm good, Uncle Nick. How are you?"

"Been better, hon. Anything exciting happen?"

"Well, I have a few siblings, plus, we moved."

"A few? Guess your parents like to screw, huh?"

"Two. Baby sister, and a younger brother. And, yeah, tell me about it," I said with a chuckle. "Also, you said you moved?" He asked. I nodded my head. "When I was round seven."

"Let me guess: House of Mystery."

"Try again, uncle."

"Some shithole your father bought in Liverpool," he guessed. "Partially," I responded. "That leaves... Shadowcrest Manor." I smiled. So he is smart.

"Thank you, darling," he said with a smile.

It's changed.

More... dark.

Sinister.

No.

This can't be true.

"Now, it's time to get some long-overdue revenge," he snarled. What?

No.

No.

That's, it's not—

"NRUTER!"

I shot up in bed, breathing heavily. "No," I breathed. I ran out of my room. "MUM! DAD! MUM!!!" I yelled. "Love, what happened?! Are you alright?" Dad asked. "Honey, what's wrong?"

"Mum, Dad, I'm so sorry... I... I fell for it... I... I told him where we were... told him about V and Robin... I'm so sorry..." I hurriedly said. "Honey, who? Who did you tell?"

"Uncle Nick. He's coming."

Glass shattered.

"Bollocks. ALLISON!" Dad yelled, running towards her room and struggling to open the door. "Shit. It's locked, dammit!"

"YOU'RE A MAGICIAN FOR GOD'S SAKE!"

"Muta statum pessuli," Dad chanted, trying to unlock the door. "Goddammit! Move it, conman! Kcolnu eht rood!" Mom yelled before trying again.

When that didn't work, she kicked the door down, all of us running in, the window by her dresser broken, only catching a glance at Nick's face as he ran away from the house.

No...

Chapter Text

No...

"Sabrina. What did you do?!"

"I'm... I'm sorry... I didn't know!"

"Didn't..?! WE LITERALLY TOLD YOU EARLIER TODAY HOW BAD OF A HUMAN THAT BASTARD WAS, AND WHAT DO YOU DO, GIVE AWAY YOUR LOCATION AND THE FACT YOU HAVE A FIVE-YEAR-OLD SISTER THAT DOESN'T KNOW SHE HAS MAGICAL POWERS YET! SABRINA ELIZABETH CONSTANTINE-FUCKING-ZATARA, WHAT WERE YOU THINKING?!"

"I'm sorry, Mum! I really am!"

"Zee, Love, yell at Sabrina later, we can still catch Nick."

"He's gone, John. I can't feel his magic around anymore. I need to call Bruce and Sara."

"You're going to see Aunt Sara?" I asked.

What can I say, she's the best godmother I could ask for.

"Your father and I are going to see your Aunt Sara. You and Robin are going to see Nimue. She should be able to help. If she turns you away, go to your Uncle Bruce. Am I understood?"

I nodded my head, and Robin did, too. "And this does not mean that you're off of the hook, young lady. When we get your sister back, you are in so much trouble."

"What your Mum said. I am very disappointed in you, Sabrina." She waved a hand, and she and dad were gone.

"What were you thinking, Brina?"

"Look, he appeared to me, I- I didn't think that the same person they said he was is the same person who took care of me when they couldn't be bothered to... I'm sorry, Robin."

"Sorry's not gonna help us find Ally. Let's go to Nimue's."

~Zee's PoV~

My girl has all the idiotic tendencies of John.

Except John wouldn't be fooled into something like this.

"What the fuck?!"

Guess we dropped in on them having one of their "Legends bonding times". (So this is post-Heyworld crew. Zari, Ray, Nora, Mick, Sara + Ava. No Behrad, Zari changed into the Tazari version, and John's not on the crew)

"Calm down, Sara, we just need some information, then we'll be out of your hair. Oh, and hey, everyone."

"You can't get it yourself?" She asked. "Where's Sabrina? Where's Robin? Where's Allison?"

I sighed. "Nick took Allison. Sabrina and Robin are talking to Xanadu. We need a location on a mage, and he hides himself pretty well from our usual type," I explained. "Gideon?"

"Yes, Ms. Zatara?"

"Locate Allison Anne-Marie Constantine-Zatara, present day."

"Right away." A few seconds passed. "I'm sorry, magic blocks the locator technology I use, Ms. Zatara."

Of fucking course.

"Can you find Nicolas Edgar Necro?"

A few more seconds.

"I am sorry, I really am, Ms. Zatara."

What else was I expecting?

"Thanks for trying. If you'll excuse me, I'm going to make sure my daughter doesn't fuck up anything else."

"What happened, anyway?"

"Nick apparently visited Sabrina in her dreams, and she accidentally spilled that we live in Shadowcrest and that she has a five-year-old sister. He broke into Shadowcrest and kidnapped Ally," I quickly explained. "Why can't you just magic your way over to his ass?" Mick asked. "His magic prevents me from seeing where he is, and vice versa. That's how we kept Robin and Allison secret from him for so long." 

"Wait, hold on, someone took Ally?" Zari asked. "Yes, Zari, someone took my daughter, that "someone" being John and mine's ex-boyfriend who almost sacrificed her older sister in a summoning ritual almost ten years ago."

"Oh, that's horrible! What can I do to help?"

"Nothing, socialite," I spat.

Look, I know she's trying to help, but, I just can't with her right now.

The fact that she was John's side chick— without my permission or know, might I stress— for a few months while he was on the Waverider before they broke up gets under my skin more than it should.

 "John, we can't find any help here. I need to make sure Sabrina doesn't blow anything up while at Nimue's."

"Now, Love, I'm sure she wo—"

"You raised her, Constantine. She'll blow something up," I snapped, walking through the portal, and came to Nimue telling my kids to get out of her house. "Nimue."

"Zatanna, your daughter is more disrespectful than that husband of yours."

Of fucking course.

"I'm sorry, Nimue, if we had any other choice—"

"You wouldn't come to me. Trust me, Zatanna, I know. You say this every time, and frankly, I'm tired of your daughter. I despise her more than Constantine."

"Look, Nimue, we just need a simple locator spell. We just need to find Allison, or Nick Necro. Please."

"Go ask someone else. The way your daughter acts, I'm not helping."

Dammit, Sabrina, what the hell did you do?!

Well, time to visit Bruce.

"Sabrina—"

"Let's just focus on finding my little sister right now, you have time to yell at me later."

"Alright, let's go to your Uncle Bruce's then." I opened another portal and hopped through.

With all hope, he has a tracking device on my little girl.

Never thought I'd be saying those words.

"Zatanna," he greeted. "Bruce, someone took Allison. Please tell me you have a way to locate her."

"Lucky for you, I actually do. Jennifer."

"I know what to do. One second."

She went shooting off and came back after a few seconds with Bruce's tablet.

Why can't my girl be more like Damian's for God's sake?

Probably because Damian's ten times the dad John'll ever be.

"Oh, hey, Brina. Robin."

"Jen."

"Sheesh, what happened to you? You're usually much more... fun than this."

"Sabrina is the reason why her little sister is missing. Bruce, did you find anything?"

"Yes, and no. I tracked her last known location, but then it went cold."

"That'll do. Thank you, Bruce." I looked at the location quickly and passed it onto my husband.

We know where it is.

If she isn't dead...

That's a miracle in itself.

"John..."

Cult of the Cold Flame.

Oh, no...

"Zee, I know. Kids, you're going to stay with the Legends on the Waverider."

"What? Why? I want to help get Ally back, please. It's my fault she's gone."

"Look, Love, where your sister is... that place is dangerous. Stay on the Waverider, and don't move from there." Robin stared at us. "For once, I'm with the trainwreck. If it's too dangerous for us, there's a big chance that you'll need some backup."

"Wait, who took her?"

"Nick."

"Nick Necro took Allison?" Bruce asked. I nodded. "Yeah. A certain daughter of mine revealed to the bastard that we were living at Shadowcrest and that she had a five-year-old sister. Next thing you know, a window shattered and my girl's taken from her bed."

"Alright, then, this just escalated. Do you two have a plan?"

"Consisted of the Legends and/or the Justice League Dark being there for backup."

"Where would we stay?! You want us to stay with the Legends!"

"We want you to stay on the Waverider with, ideally, your Aunt Nora and your Uncle Ray," I clarified. "Hell no! No way I'm sittin' this one out! I can hold my own against a few arseholes, Mum! You know I can defend myself! I was—"

"Was trained by a member of the League of Assassins, Sabrina, honey, we know. That League training plus your magic should be more than enough for a normal mission. For this one, no. I'm calling the shots here, you're staying out of danger's way. The man almost killed you once, I'm not letting him anywhere near my children ever again if I have anything to say about it. John, let's go." I opened a portal over to the Waverider and hopped through with the rest of my family. "Hi, we need some backup. Bruce found a location for Allison, and it's a place that we'll need some backup with, and we also need someone, preferably two to stay and watch Sabrina and Robin."

"Got it. Ray, you've got that thing with kids. You will stay back and watch over the two of them."

Sabrina scoffed. "Are you bloody kiddin' me?! The bloke's as lame as they get!"

"Young lady, you are there reason why we are in this situation in the first place, you do not get to pick who watches over you or not," I snapped. "It is three in the fucking morning, and I do not want to deal with your attitude right now."

"Be fucking sides, I am sixteen, almost seventeen, and can take care of myself!"

I laughed. "After what you just caused, there's no way I'm letting you be by yourself in our own house, let alone a time-traveling spaceship. Robin, maybe. But you, no way. I don't trust you normally, let alone after you caused your little sister to get kidnapped. So, you do not have a single say in who watches over you or not."

"Ray and Zari, stay on the ship. Everyone else, move out and follow Constantine."

"Are you kidding me?! I get the two lamest muppets on this bloody ship for a babysitter?! The least you could do is stick me with Charlie, for God's sake!"

"This is for your safety, not enjoyment. I find out that you went anywhere— I repeat, anywhere during our time away, and you will get the worst grounding of your life, Sabrina," I threatened before opening a portal. "Legends, let's go." We came out to the broken-down place I've seen before.

Seventeen years ago, this is the first place the three of us went to together.

The first time we got a glimpse of his madness, his obsession.

"You sure this is the place?" Ava asked. I glanced over at John. "Yeah. We're certain."

"Well, let's get the baby witch back so I can go back to drinking," Mick grunted. "That "baby witch" doesn't know she has powers yet, and doesn't even know how to access them other than a summoning spell when she was one or two. She doesn't know how to do an actual spell, and that "baby witch" is my daughter, Mick, and one that I cherish greatly."

"Yeah, yeah, let's kick this mage's ass already."

Sara kicked down the door, and we were met with blackness. "Etanimulli," I muttered.

Nothing.

"You sure this is the right place?" Ava asked again. I feel his pull of magic, now. "Yes, Ava, this is most definitely the right place. He's here."

A blow to my head, and I fell unconscious.

~Sabrina's PoV~

"So, kids, you hit the babysitter lottery!" Ray exclaimed. "Look, pretty boy, one, I'm not a kid, neither is Robin, we are both more than bloody capable of taking care of ourselves, and we definitely don't need a babysitter, especially one like your daft arse!"

"Yep, you're definitely John's daughter."

"Oh, yeah, an' is that s'possed to be a bad thing?" I countered. "Seeing as how many enemies your father has, yes." I scoffed. "Well, I have got a thing or two to say 'bout you, Ray. First of bloody all, your energy gives me a fuckin' mi—"

"Sabrina, stop trying to curse our uncle out." I shot Robin a glare. "Calm down, Sabrina," Zari said, looking up from her phone. "What, you gonna sit on that bloody cell phone all day?"

"Isn't that what you kids do these days anyway?" I sighed. "You're fucking kidding me. I get the worst possible two people to babysit me. Just bloody wonderful."

A pain shot through my head, and I almost fell to the ground.

Mum, screaming.

Oh, no...

"Sabrina! Sabrina, oh, my gosh, are you alright?" Ray asked, helping me up. "Mum an' the rest of the Legends are in trouble. We need to go."

"No, no, your mother was very specific and very clear to not let you go off of this ship, Sabrina. You are not going off of this ship, especially to aid your mother who told you to not go after her." I took a step closer to him and ignited a flame in my palm. "Yeah, you deal with this one, Ray. I'm going to the kitchen for my mealy juice, let me know if they do anything that I should deal with."

Zari walked away.

I cast a silent deafening spell on her.

Best she doesn't know what I'm about to do.

"Sabrina, what are you going to do?"

"This is to help Mum."

"Now, now, Sabrina, we don't need to get violent here," Ray said, trying to bargain. "Yeah, actually, you're right, we don't."

"We don't?"

"Take me to my mum, or things are gonna get violent," I threatened. "Zari? Zari! ZARI!"

"Don't bother, pretty boy. There's somethin' called a deafening spell. We got a deal?"

"S-Sabrina, this-this isn't what your mom wanted you to do!"

"She also didn't plan on getting knocked out. Are you going to take us to her or not?"

"N-no! Th-this isn't right! You are going to stay on the Wa—"

I punched him in the face, then muttered a simple "Tuokconk" spell, knocking him out instantly.

Damn, that felt good.

"Oh, my gosh, what the hell, Sabrina?!"

"Mom's in actual trouble, Robin. An' pretty boy Raymond wasn't gonna help us."

"You just punched a Legend!"

"The wimpiest of the bunch, mate. Gideon, plot a course for Zatanna Zatara's location, 2037."

"Ms. Constantine-Zatara, that is not—"

"Shite, woman! Is it so hard to want to save my mum?!" I slammed my hand on the desk thing and did a little techno-magic, shutting her off before going to the front of the bridge, sitting in the captain's chair. "Brina, do you even know how to pilot this thing?!"

I scoffed. "Auntie Sara taught me how to fly this thing when I was eleven. Trust me."

"When has that ever worked out?"

I rolled my eyes and took manual control of the ship.

And this is where I am glad that my Aunt Sara taught me how to fly this thing.

~Zee's PoV~

I woke up to a ritual, complete with fire.

With Nick in the front and holding my girl in a cage.

"You're awake. Hello, Zee." I saw John being held tightly, his shirt stained with blood. Oh, no.

"Nick!" I yelled, my voice being muffled by the gag around my mouth. "Ah, I'm sorry, my love, I can't have you casting your spells, as amazing as your voice sounds."

"LET ME GO, YOU SON OF A BITCH!" I yelled, my screams muffled. "Now, now, darling, that's no way to talk to an ex-boyfriend of yours, now, is it?"

Oh, God...

This is...

This is exactly like that nightmare I had...

First night after meeting Nick...

"LET ALLISON GO!" I yelled. "Allison, that's her name?"

"Mummy, help me! Help me!"

Chapter Text

"Mummy, help me! Help me!"

"Allison, baby, hold on!"

"There's nothing you can do, Zee! Now, I'm going to complete what I tried all those years ago! If I couldn't use your oldest daughter, guess I can use your youngest! Works out either way, better, even! She doesn't even know magic beyond an unintentional summoning spell, does she? The girl, this one, Allison, is it?"

"Don't you dare say her name!" I yelled. "What, Allison?" He threw John to the ground and went to my daughter in the cage, dragging his finger along her chin. "Ally, Ally, Ally... such an innocent little girl."

She whimpered, and I tried breaking free, screaming at him to not touch my little girl. "LET HER GO! NICK! YOU BASTARD! LET HER GO! NOW!!"

~Sabrina's PoV~

"We're here now, Robin, let's go."

Zari finally came out of the kitchen. "Woah, woah, woah, where are we, what happened?!"

"Time-jumped to where our mum is."

"What?!"

"No one else was gonna save her! Stay on the bloody ship!"

"Not a chance."

"Eh, suit yourself. Fuck you twice an' hit you over your bloody head, ya slag!"

Punched her in the face and she fell over, unconscious. "Bloody hell, that felt good. An' shite, she's a wimp. Why Dad shagged with her when he had Mum at home, I'll never know. Granted, they were taking a small break, but still."

"Holy shit, Sabrina, stop punching our Aunts and Uncles!"

"Ha, only way we're gonna save Mum. They're both gonna be useless. Let's go, Robin."

The two of us ran off of the ship and to a door.

This place is familiar...

All those years ago, this is where Nick almost killed me...

"Mum's in here. They're in trouble, and we need the Legends to help."

"Right. Do you have a way to track Aunt Sara?"

"Thanks to Pretty Boy Raymond, yeah. The bloke programmed my watch to have the locations of all the Legends. Only thing that the bastard's useful for." I opened my watch up. "These are cult-type wankers. They'll be expecting some magical spell to track 'em. They probably still have candles an' shite instead of lights. They definitely won't see some technology comin'." The tech led me to another closed door. 

Well, I've gotta make some sort of an entrance.

One the count of three, I kicked down the bloody thing, and Robin followed shortly behind. I tried to cast a spell, but, it fizzed out.

Magic dampeners.

Shite.

Good thing I had the White Canary, Ta-er Al-fucking-Safher for a martial arts teacher.

Punched, kicked, flipped, and impaled my way through the ten guards that were guarding them.

"Watch your back, Bri!" Robin yelled, sticking a small dagger he kept on him, apparently, into the neck of a guy that I failed to see. "Thanks. Find the magic dampener, take those out. I'll get the Legends out of this," I directed. He followed my directions and ran off, giving me a chance to un-gag and untie my aunts and uncles. "Damn, you're a badass."

"Learnt from the best, Godmother," I told her as I untied the rest of the Legends. "Thanks for saving our skins," Auntie Ava thanked. "No problem at all."

"Look, I'm not complaining, but, how's you- how'd you get off the Waverider?" Aunt Sara asked, rubbing her wrist and cracking her neck.

"Knocked both Ray an' Zari out. Decked em' both in the face. Hope you don't mind me sayin', but, Zari's a bit of a wimp, I knocked 'er out in one go with no spells required."

"Mm, I like you! Had any doubt before, well, I love ya' now, Brina!"

"Feelin's mutual, Charlie-O."

She doesn't want me to call her 'Aunt' anything. Makes her feel old.

As if.

She's immortal, for God's sake.

"Alright, I would normally be very, very mad at you for knocking two members of my crew out, but, I'll let it slide this one time, seeing as you just saved us."

"Great, let's go save my parents. 'Ave any idea where they are?"

"No. If we had any idea, we wouldn't be here, hair-dye," Mick grunted.

"Hey, I like dying my hair, thank you very much," I defended, flipping my black-root dark-red dyed hair over my shoulder. (Iree from Rolling Quartz)

"When you're the Weasel's daughter, I don't give a shit what you like or don't like. He's a liar, a conman. And so are you. Hell, you lifted my fucking rough draft for my unreleased novel last week, little snake."

"Hey, hey, I borrowed it. I gave it back, didn't I?"

"Without permission. And tried to blame it on Wolf Bitch."

"Alright, alright, look, I get it, you hate both me and my dad, but, he's in actual danger. So is my mum. An' baby sister."

"I don't hate you, I just find you annoying at times."

"Wait, why are they in trouble again?" Nate asked.

"Alright, it was my fault. I admit it. It's my fucking fault that my baby sister's about to be bloody sacrificed! I'm here to make sure that she doesn't die! So, if you would like to help me, that's wonderful, if not, then get out of my fucking way, I am a Constantine, and I will not hesitate to kick your ass or throw you into another dimension, or hell if you try to stop me!"

"Yep, that is- that is most definitely Constantine's daughter," Auntie Ava noted.

I don't call most of the Legends 'Auntie' or 'Uncle', unless it's Ava, who could be very scary, Ray, who insists I call him Uncle instead of Pretty Boy Raymond, and Nora, who can also be terrifying.

Robin came running back. "Ya find the magic dampeners?"

"If by that you mean take out the guy who was holding some sort of ritual that was dampening our powers, then yeah."

I easily lit a flame in my palm. "There we go. Etacol annataZ arataZ dna nhoJ enitnatsnoC!" I yelled, my magic going to another room. "Alright, let's fucking go!"

We all ran in that direction, and I busted open the door. "Time's up, ya wanker!" I yelled at Nick. I'm never falling for his tricks again. "Tuc eht sdnib gnidloh annataZ s'arataZ hceeps!" I chanted, the gag around Mum's mouth burning off of her face. "Tuc!" Mum chanted, cutting the binds off of her arms and legs. "Once we get out of this, you are in so much trouble, Sabrina!"

"I just- I just saved your arse, Mum! Literally! I just..! You know what, there's no point, you're gonna yell at me, anyways. 'EY! NICK! ARSEHOLE! YOU'RE GONNA PAY FOR FUCKING WITH MY FAMILY!" I yelled, igniting a flame in both my palms. "LET'S DANCE, YOU BLOODY GIT!"

"Ah, ah, ah, Sabrina, honey, don't want to hurt your old man, do you, now?" He asked, holding my dad by his hair, pressing a dagger to his neck.

I floated back down to the ground. "Don't hurt him, please," I pleaded.

"Mm, then back off, hon." I glared at him. "Get your sister," Mum told me. I nodded my head and turned myself invisible, going over to the cage that my sister was being held in. He can probably sense magic, period.

Good thing I'm quite talented at picking locks.

Yet another wonderful habit that I picked up from my old man.

And not just because I can help out with scams.

Alright, mostly so I can help out with scams.

Whatever.

Comes in handy, like right now. 

Within a few seconds, the lock clattered against the ground.

I might be a bit out of practice, but, I've still got it.

Ally started hyperventilating. "Esrever," I chanted, undoing the spell. "Hey, hey, Ally, it's me, calm down, Love, I'm here, don't worry, you're here, you're safe. I'll get you out of 'ere." I pulled her into my arms and tried stepping out of the pentagram. "Funny thing about a rune, dear-" I turned to find Nicolas fucking Necro staring me down while still holding my dad in a chokehold. "Once a person's bound in it, they can't get out of it. Well, not until the sorcerer is dead, which, let me tell you, will never happen."

"DAMN IT, NECRO, YOU LET MY FAMILY GO! RIGHT NOW!"

Shite, last time I saw her this mad, I actually cussed out the principal of my middle school.

Oh, mind you, I put a curse on that minger, too.

A pretty strong one, at that.

Bitch had bad luck for two weeks before Mum made me change her back just so she wouldn't get a piano dropped on her head every time she walked out the door.

What?

Dad dared me to do it.

"Nowhere to run, Necro," Aunt Nora said, appearing behind him. "Nora, I can get your father out of Hell. I can bring him back."

Her gaze softened.

Shite!

"Nora, don't agree to anything from this bloody prat! He's a dark magician! When it comes to blokes like this, it c-" Dad started before Nick tiled his head up more, thinning the amount of skin between his dagger and my dad's throat. "Hush, Johnny, it ought to be Darhk's choice if she wants to make a deal with me or not."

"I happen to know a very powerful bloke by the name of Lucifer, so, I wouldn't-"

"Ah, Morningstar."

"Earth-666, Los Angeles, bastard."

Oh, shit.

"Timsnart ym sthguoht ot nhoJ enitnatsnoC," I muttered.

Sorry to burst your bubble, Dad, but, I don't think he's gonna be willing to lend you a hand with anything after we lifted that money last time we saw him.

Bollocks. So, you take after me, but only take after your mother when you're right?

You were the one who convinced me to lift the second portion of it off of him in the first place.

Damn it, why'd you have to be a miniature version of me?

You're the one who raised me for God's sake! I was with you all my life, even when you and Mum went through a mini-divorce! I was with you when-

I get the idea, Love. Let's focus on gettin' me out of this arsehole's grasp, yeah? 

"No one gets out of Hell. I know that much from Constantine. I've been there, and he's not coming out. I'd be out of my mind if I would take a deal like that, let alone from someone like you, who doesn't keep a single promise." Aunt Nora pressed the dagger into his back further. I set my baby sister down onto the ground and stepped out of the rune, joining my  mum. "Let Allison and John go," both Sara an' Mum said at the same time, a staff in Sara's hands and sparks of magic in Mum's. "What the ladies said," Mick seconded, aiming the flame gun or whatever at his head. "Pathetic. You think I'm actually scared of these cute little things? Watch this." He blasted everyone away, except for Charlie. "Ya might not be scared of them, but, I don't think you want to pick a fight with one of the three fates, now, do ya?"

Three... what?

"Oh, and did I forget to mention that I'm a Homo Magi, and can quite literally throw you into your own personal hell with a single spell?"

"Let. Allison. Go," Nate commanded, steeling up or whatever. Mum summoned a shit ton of knives and positioned them all at Nick's head and throat. "Let my husband and daughter go, and I might just not kill you, Necro."

I have a badass family.

Nick started chanting a spell, activating the rune.

Shit, that is some really dark magic.

Mum yelled at Dad for months after he used a spell like this.

"No!" I yelled, shooting a blast at his head, and only his head, narrowly missing Dad.

Shite, Sabrina, don't bloody kill me!

I got him off of you, didn't I?!

That blast of magic stopped him from creating the ritual, and Mum pinned him to the ground right after. "Let. My daughter. Go."

He chuckled. "Just like old times, eh, Zee? Other side round, you bottoming for me, then it'll be deja fucking vu. You want that, Princess?"

"You sick son of a fucking bitch, you let my daughter go, right now."

"What Zatara said," Dad seconded, igniting a flame in his palm and holding it close to Nick's face, a foot away from his skin. "You bastard, let my girl go. You know I won't hesitate to kill, thanks to your bloody influence. So, what's it gonna be? Let our daughter go, or die. She's gonna get free either way. Your choice, Nicky."

"I'll take it to my grave, Constantine!"

"Suit yourself, arsehole." With that, he snapped Nick's neck. "Sabrina, Robin, sweethearts, you shouldn't have to see this. Come on."

"Love, Bri's killed before."

She short him a glare. "What? How else do you think I freed the Legends? Thought they were unprotected? There were at least ten guards with them."

"You- you- oh, my- you are in so much—"

"If you say trouble, I will deck you in the face again. I damn demons back to hell with you on the regular."

"Still, I—"

"You decked your mum in the face?" Charlie asked. "I'm impressed."

"Yeah, and it hurt. Thanks, Sara."

"Hey, you're the one who asked me to train her in the first place," Sara defended. Mum got Ally out of the rune. "Allison, sweetie, you're gonna be alright. Okay? Listen to me, you're gonna be okay." She started crying. "Hey, hey, Ally, you're okay. My beautiful, strong, girl, you are alright," Mum tried reassuring. "Mummy... the bad man... he... he cut me."

Chapter Text

Another fucking wonderful day at high school.

Metropolis High sucks.

Worse than that so-called Junior High School of Success, even with the bitch principal.

Doesn't help that everyone just knows me as the daughter of the guy who was always caught smoking and the girl who always showed off.

Wanna make a name for myself, ya know?

Probably gonna end up becoming the bitch who dyes her hair every month and likes to curse people out, but still.

I don't even have my friends with me.

Jen's in Gotham, Mia's in Star City, and Lyta's getting homeschooled by her grandma.

Now that sounds wonderful.

Why can't I just get homeschooled by Uncle Jason again?

Hell, I'll pass for my mum to homeschool me.

Anything but this shite school.

Maybe Dad—

Nah, not that desperate.

"Hey, hon, how was school?" Mum asked. "Can I have a drink?" I asked in return. "That bad, huh?" Dad asked, sliding me a glass of some sort of alcohol.

"Don't even start," I responded, downing the glass as Mum glared at both me and Dad. "She is way too young to be drinking, John! Especially right after school! There is a—" she started before Dad cut her off. "Tell you what, sweetie. I've got a job I need to do, what do you say we do a little father-daughter time?"

"Please. Take me out of this place."

"Brilliant, Bri. Let's g—" he started.

Then Mum stepped in and had to ruin the fun. "Ah, ah, ah, no, Johnny, she has her homework."

"Damn. Alright, finish up your work from school, then I'll take ya out with me. Don't worry, I'll wait."

Let me tell you, I couldn't finish my stupid homework faster.

Within the hour, I was ready. "Dad, ready!"

"John, she better not get into a fight or anything," I heard Mum say. "Relax, Love. She's with me. What could go wrong?"

"A million things could go wrong when you're involved, John. She comes back with more than a small cut, and I will quite seriously hex you into next year," Mum told him in all seriousness.

I saw her and Dad come out of their room, Mum dressed in only his usual white shirt, and Dad in his normal clothes. Guess they were shagging. "Eh, you love me too much for that. You would hex me, though, just not into next year." She rolled her eyes and pulled him by his tie in for a kiss.

My turn to roll my eyes.

Most kids would be like: EWWW MY PARENTS ARE KISSING, GROSS!!!

Please.

I've walked in on them shagging before.

Hell, I've heard my dad call Mum a whore during sex.

It gets tiring after a while.

He pulled away and turned to me. "Ready, Brina?"

"When am I not?"

He chuckled and lit a cigarette. "That's my girl. Let's go, Love."

"Wait, where are you going?" Robin asked. "Takin' your sister out for an errand I gotta do."

"Meaning you're going to go and con someone."

"What can I say? We'll be back in a few hours at the most." Hopped through a portal, and came to what looked like a club. What the...

This is new.

And definitely gonna get us in trouble with Mum.

"Where are we now, an' what are we nicking today?"

"This is an entrance to the place down below."

That's a new one.

"Who we conning today?"

He chuckled again. "I am such a bad influence."

"Yeah, but, you're the best dad I could ask for. I mean, what other dad would let their daughter perform in a bloody rock band an' let her dye her hair at eleven? You're the best."

"Your mum does the real parenting, I'm just there for a bit of fun every now an' then."

Well, he's still awesome. "Still haven't answered my question."

"Bout time you meet the big boys. We're goin' to see Lucifer."

Oh, my God.

YES!

LET'S FUCKING GO!

Holy shit, this is better than last year during my birthday last year when Aunt Sara took me back in time to go to a Metallica concert and meet and greet.

"Let's go, Love."

We walked over to the entrance, Dad did his spells, and the door opened. "Abraca-fucking-dabra." Walked through the portal and was dropped right in front of some sort of bar.

Great. "Sabrina, welcome to Hell."

Almost opened the door, but I stopped him a second before. "Wait. We're gonna be doin' shite with a demon, we've got to have some sort of link so they don't hear us."

"Yeah, you're right. Good thinking, Love."

"Timsnart ym sthguoht ot nhoJ enitnatsnoC," I muttered.

Then he opened the door to the bar, and there were demons dancing in fucking metal cages on the sides of the room.

Okay, I'm straight, and I know I'm dating William and these are damned souls, but that's kind of hot.

"Does Mum know about those?" I asked, referring to the dancers. Dad laughed. "Nah. She'd kill me for lookin' at any girl, let alone a succubus, let alone takin' you here."

"Why are we here, anyway?"

"That bloke." Dad motioned to some guy that was surrounded by succubi.

"That's Lucifer? Lucifer fucking Morningstar, the Devil?" I asked with a raised eyebrow. "Yep. The bastard himself. Let's go, Love."

"Why are we here, again?"

"One, the bloke owes me a few pounds from last time we met that he never gave. Two, your school day sounds like it was shite and I wanted to make it up to you, and three, your mum grills me whenever I go on these trips by myself an' insists that I take Etrigan with me, and sometimes I just don't want to. Love her to death, but she can be a little irritating at times. Promise me that you won't tell your mum where we went, yeah?"

"Yep."

"Great, Love. Let's go." Both of us walked over to him. "Oi! Lucy!"

"Johnny," he said in return, shooing off the succubi.

Huh. "Oh, hello, there. What're you doing with a guy like Constan-tyne?"

Wait, that's how you pronounce my last name?

Yeah, no. He just does that to piss me off.

"Who's the girl?" I looked at Dad, and he just stared back at me. "What? You have a voice. Go on," he said. "Sabrina. Constantine-Zatara," I introduced. "Ah, looks like you and the Magi finally settled, huh? Well, mazel tov! She's quite pretty." Rolled my eyes and just looked at my nails.

Dad sighed. "Let's just skip the pleasantries, shall we, mate? Give me my money, and I'll be on my merry bloody way an' take my girl with me."

"Mm, not happening, Johnny. You know that's not how this works."

"Not in front of my kid, yeah?"

Either they beat each other up or they have sex.

My guess is the second one. "What, you shag with him?"

"Yeah."

"Does Mum know?" I asked. "Take a guess, Love."

"Nope."

"Well assumed, Brina."

"Explain why we're here, again?"

"He owes me some money," he explained before turning to Lucifer. "Pay up."

"Already told you, Johnny, not happening. Less you do the usual, you're not getting shit. But, oh, you have a little girl with you, and you don't want you to see her old dad doing that, do you?"

"Oh, sod off."

"What, you thought just because you brought your kid with you that I would give you whatever you claim I owe you?" He asked. "Kind of, yeah."

Wait, Dad, how much this bastard owe you?

£100. Why?

Your vocabulary's not the only thing I picked up from you.

You do this, there's no goin' back.

If I wanted to go back, I wouldn't have come with you in the first place, now would I? I didn't come with you to have some ice cream and see movies an' shite, I came with you to help you con some poor sod blind.

Don't put it like that, Jesus Christ.

Just keep him busy or whatever while I nick some stuff from him. Swear I won't tell Mum, an' I definitely won't look out of my own free will.

Got it.

Great, now go shag the Devil.

That's not a weird sentence to say at all.

"Alright, you've got yourself a deal, Lucy. Let's go."

Took us to some fucking castle.

You're telling me he lives here?

Yeah. He does.

"Your daughter better not steal anything."

"Relax, she takes after her mum," Dad lied. "The fact that she has dyed her hair split-side, which looks very hot, by the way, and that she came down here with you wants me to believe otherwise." (Kinda going Arang from Pink Fantasy during their Poison/Alice in Wonderland era vibe here with straight hair + a side part (also also, when I designed Sabrina for the first time, I kind of designed her after Sabrina from Grimm Sisters) so that's where her hair comes from. And I just chose Sabrina cos it's a cool witch name)

"Won't steal a thing. Swear by it."

He took Dad into another room, and I was left in the middle of a room in Hell.

Completely normal Tuesday.

Wonder what Mum's making for dinner?

Focus, Brina.

Sorry.

By the way, use Latin instead of backward magic. Magic dampeners. He can feel when you use a new spell while using that.

"Revelare vasorum magni pretii," I muttered.

In my vision, I saw a shite ton of stuff highlighted.

Hot damn, this is gonna be a big payday.

Don't get caught, or at least, try not to. Alright?

Yeah, yeah. I'll just walk around and swipe it into my coat, no big deal. There's a reason why I wear a cult-looking robe.

You better not get caught.

Are you really talking to me while having sex with Lucifer bloody Morningstar?

Are you really thinking about what your mum's making for dinner while you're supposed to be stealing something?

Point taken.

But, hey, it's working, init? Buying you time to nick some shite from this bastard, aren't I?

Yeah, true.

Hurry up.

Yes, sir.

Walked around the room and quickly grabbed a pretty thick stack of money, sliding it into one of the many pockets inside of mum's old coat.

How much you just nab?

You can—

How much, Bri?

My best guess, maybe £120.

Absolutely bloody brilliant. Grab some more shite, and then we'll be on our way.

Got it.

Walked to another location in this giant ass room and picked up a pretty big relic.

Dad, just snatched a relic. You ready?

It'll be a hot second, hold on, Bri.

You've gotta be kidding me.

Shut it and let me finish up here.

For God's- I already took what he owes you and probably more because of that relic I just lifted.

The more money the better, Love. It'll only be a second. Alright?

Fine. I'll see what else I can get.

Yeah. You're a kid. You can get away with shite that I can't. Why else do you think I pull you along for half of the scams I did?

I still can't believe you're seriously doing this while having sex with Lucifer. He suspecting anything?

Nah. Thinks I'm just a bit rusty from last time. Also, be glad I'm not thinking about the bastard.

Walked to another space in the room and swiped another relic into my coat pocket.

Got another one, Dad.

Can't believe I'm saying this, but, this might be the easiest job you've ever ta—

"You little sneak, what are you doing?"

Spoke too soon.

Shite.

Dammit!

"Now, now, let's not be hasty," I gently laughed. The demon gripped my wrist tightly.

Get out of their grip, now, Sabrina!

The fuck am I supposed to—

YOU KNOW LATIN FOR GOD'S BLOODY SAKE!

"Right. ABSOLUTIO!"

How you doing?

Currently giving the devil a blowjob, so, not very good, seeing as I love your mum.

Ew, gross. Hurry the bloody hell up so we can get out of here.

Yeah, yeah.

For God's sake, I'm battling a demon right now, I think getting your £100 is the least of your concern!

You've done it before, relax.

YOUR DAUGHTER IS ABOUT TO BE KILLED BY A DEMON, AND ALL YOU SAY IS 'YOU'VE DONE IT BEFORE' AND TELL ME TO RELAX?! HOLY SHIT, DAD!

"Inspiratione!" I yelled, blasting the bitch away from me.

Couldn't have done something a little more quiet?!

You sure you're not gonna get me or yourself killed?!

Quite sure, yeah!

ARE YOU SERIOUSLY STILL SHAGGING WITH—

Yes, okay?! Just hold the bloody hell fuck on!

I ignited flames in my palms and sent them towards the demon. "Time to burn, you arsehole."

"You think a fireball will harm me?! You must be insane if you think that fire would harm me, more insane than your father!"

I scoffed. "Maybe not fire will, you prat, but this might! Summone sanctum aqua!"

Wow.

I am surprised that worked in Hell.

Especially since I just learned that spell on land a week ago.

Water flowed into my palm and then I shot it towards the demon, and they started screaming in pain. "Yeah, that's right!"

Dad, hurry up, I just had to summon holy water using Latin to fight a demon since you told me to not use backward magic!

We are done. That demon dealt with, yet?

Yes, burnt to a bloody crisp on the floor and reborn in hell. Hurry up so I don't die!

One second.

You're gonna 'One second' my arse until I die, aren't you?

He's about to come out. Act like ya didn't just vaporize a demon, m'kay?

Course.

Flipped my hood back on and pretended to walk from the other side.

Uncle Cisco offered to make me a legit hero suit, but, Mum said no. Said I was too young to have a legit suit.

Right now, I look like I'm about to go to a cult meeting. Black dress, robe, shoes, the whole gig.

But, that's fine for right now.

Perfect, actually.

"Pleasure doin' business with ya, Lucy," Dad said, shaking Lucifer's hand. I passed Lucifer and reached into the pocket of his coat to get a few pounds, which I then pocketed in my own.

Dad saw me and shot a smirk my way.

Nice going, Sabrina.

Thanks, Dad.

"See you whenever, mate."

I did my usual send-off, stepping into the portal after my dad.

Once we came out, I pulled my hood off, and both of us smiled at each other, giving each other a high five. "Let's bloody go, Brina! C'mon, take the lot out, let's see what you got."

I pulled everything out and laid it out on the table. "Best bloody con partner I've ever had, I'll tell ya that. Nice goin', Love."

"Ahem."

Shite.

We're busted.

And dead.

You can say that again.

I turned to see Mum there, holding my little sister's hand as well as Robin standing right next to them.

"Um..."

"You went to Hell, which you know I'm against, and on top of that, you brought our fourteen-year-old daughter with you. Don't- you lifted that, didn't you? John, I swear to God, this is the last time you ever—"

"How'd you even know?" I asked. She scoffed. "Hell smells like sulfur and cigarette smoke. Worse than your father's, anyway. He's come home from it and then had sex with me right after way too many times, I know the smell by now."

Wait, let me get this straight. You have sex with Lucifer for a relic or some money, and then you come home and immediately have sex with Mum?

We all have our own thing. You date the son of the bastard who raped your mum, and I sleep with the Devil. Don't question each other, we'll turn out just fine.

"Kept my promise, didn't I? She doesn't even have a cut."

"Nah, I'm scarred mentally by the fact you shag Lucifer," I muttered under my breath.

Chapter Text

"God, I hate my fucking school," I announced once I teleported Robin and me home back to Dad's flat in Liverpool, where I was supposed to go after school, since Mum has a show she has to work. How Dad is just fine with Mum going out in public in a leotard and fishnets I'll never know. "Hey, kids," Dad greeted.

Oh, he's hanging out with his old friends. Newcastle Crew.

"Hey," I greeted all of them before sitting down and pulling out a project I was supposed to do a week ago and is due tomorrow.

What?

It is not my fault Sara pulled me on for a Legends mission while my parents were busy.

Okay, I might've been able to do my homework on the ship, but, Mick and Mona dropped a new novel, what was I supposed to do?

Not to mention Nate was having one of those Old Movie marathons.

"What'd you do this time, Sabrina?" Aunt Zed asked. "Nothing, absolutely nothing. The fucking principal hates me for no apparent reason! All I did was call someone a wanker after they so-graciously insulted me and my parents because every fucking body loves to just pick on me endlessly! Next thing ya know, the bitch's calling my mum and I'm in trouble, again. For God's sake, I didn't even start to curse her out or anythin'! All I bloody did was call her a wanker an' tell her that she's useless in life!"

"You did a little more than that, Bri, you cursed her lunchbox to attack her during school."

"Shut up, Robin! She deserved it!"

"Sheesh. People today. So sensitive. When we were in school—"

"You mean when you weren't skipping, Mopey Mary?"

"Oi, shut it, Gary. As I was saying, people could take some hits when we were in school. Hell, supervisors pretty much did nothing. Why in the world you would get in trouble just for an insult or two is beyond me," Aunt Zed told me, sipping on her drink. "You know... when your dad got in trouble by a teacher, we used to all pull something on them. Wanna try that?" She recalled after a few seconds. "You're forgetting one little thing, Zed."

"What, Chas? This is- this is perfect. Beth gets some payback on some minger that hates her, we get to have a bit of fun, and no one ever fucks with her or her family ever again! Win-win-win, mate."

"Tanna."

Mum.

That's what they call her.

"Oh, right."

"Don't think she'd like it if her daughter did anything that we did back 'ere when we were in England."

Dad laughed. "Bri already does most of the shite I did at her age, if a bit lighter, Chas. 'Preciate your concern, really do, mate, but, if she didn't want Brina to be like me, she would've stopped her from doin' half of the shite she does. I'm saying do it, Bri. Hell, I'll dare you to do it. Sounds like it'll be fun."

"This doesn't sound like a good idea, Dad..."

"Oh, be quiet and stop being a buzzkill, Robin," I snapped.

"Alright. So, curse her to fall on her arse an' bust a hip or somethin'?" I asked, turning to Dad and Aunt Zed. "Now, now, that's thinking small, child. You really wanna get back at her for the amount of times she's gotten you in trouble with your mum?" (I am having so much fun writing Zed as the bad influence, worse than JC if possible, I'm really testing to see if it is—)

"Definitely."

"C'mon. Your dad and I've got a few ideas."

"Bri, Dad, this isn't a—"

"You say good idea, I'll toss your arse into an alternate dimension," I cut him off. "You don't know what it's like to be me. Principal Jackson, she likes you."

"Maybe for a reason, sister. I'm not the one who curses people out. Be more like me, and maybe, you'll get some people to not hate your guts," he muttered. "What, a goody-two-shoes that the teachers consider is the best student they've ever had?" I chuckled. "No, thanks, rehtorb. I'd rather people hate me than be like you."

"People do hate you," he pointed out. I rolled my eyes and followed Dad and Aunt Zed through the door.

Do you know how much preparation a bad luck curse takes?

Yeah, I didn't, either.

Took nearly five hours until we stepped out of the room.

"She's gonna wish she never bloody screwed with me. How long did ya say it would take?"

"T'morrow mornin', by the latest."

"An' she's not gonna die, right?" I clarified.

"Course not. What d'ya think I am, a monster?" Dad asked. "Um, right about, yeah. I mean, you're basically on-par with Lucifer and other crazy demons from what I could tell."

"Whatever. Let's go to sleep, yeah?"

"Yeah."

That night, I slept the best I've ever fucking had before.

Woke up the next morning refreshed as could be.

"Bye, Mum!"

Magic-ed both Robin and me over to school.

Huh. It's raining.

And Principal Bitch doesn't have an umbrella.

I conjured one for Robin and me in the back alley, so, we're good.

"Hi, Principal Jackson," I said with a smile. "Sabrina."

"Why don't you have an umbrella?" Robin asked. "Oh, hello, Robin. I seemed to have forgotten one inside, and then locked myself out of my house."

Hell, yes!

This is working perfectly.

"What you smiling about, girl?" She snapped. "Nothing, nothing, it's just my dad said he would take me to some rock concert on Saturday."

"Oh, right, that trainwreck of a father you have."

My fist clenched, and I could start to feel myself go slightly out of control. "Brina. Deep breath in, breathe out. Come on," Robin muttered, putting his hand on mine.

"I'm okay, I'm fine," I told myself, loosening up my fist and calming down as Principal Bitch walked away.

"Damn right you are," some random jackass who looks like his name is Chad and one of the biggest douchebags in the school said. "Shut your ass before I beat you up, loser," I shot.

Lunchtime.

Some bird shitted on Principal Bitch's jacket.

It's not even a legit designer jacket.

Knockoff.

And then she got soup and various other shite thrown onto her shirt.

Smiled like Christmas came early.

And God knows Christmas in the Constantine household is insanely over-the-top.

Teleported back home with Robin back to Shadowcrest.

"And why are you smiling like you just got back from one of those rock concerts your father loves taking you to, hm, young lady?" Mum questioned. "You're never this happy and smiley when you come back from school, hell, only time when you're this cheery is when those Queen siblings are around. Specially that boy. William. I'm just saying, if he's anything like his father, I'd watch out."

"And why do you dress like you're coming back from a strip club, Mum?" I countered. "Mm, well played, hon. Your father taught you well," she responded. "Speaking of, where's Dad? I need to talk to him."

"He'll be back in ten minutes or so. Out with his friends."

"Great."

He teleported in ten minutes later, smelling like he was on fire.

"'Ello, Love, I'm home," he said. 

"Jesus, Johnny, you smell like hell mixed with cigarette smoke and a little death," Mum commented. He chuckled. "Yeah, love ya too, Zee." They shared a pretty damn passionate kiss.

Jesus Christ, they're weird.

Dad turned to me. "Hey, Bri, how'd that thing at school go?" He asked. "Can I talk to you bout that, actually?"

"Yeah, sure." Walked into my room, and then closed the door. "Alright, what happened?"

"She got her coat shitted on by a bird, locked herself out of the house, got rained on with no umbrella, and got soup and other random shite spilled on her shirt. Works better than I thought it would."

"Perfect. Anythin' else happen?"

"Normal shite, some douche hit on me, Principal Bitch called you a trainwreck—" I started before Dad cut me off. "She ain't wrong, ya know, I kinda am. Just ask your mum. She'll tell ya all about it."

"Mm, Mum's also right about you smellin' like cigarette smoke and death. The hell did you an' Aunt Zed even do?"

"Stuff that'll probably get me in trouble with your mum. I'm gonna go take a shower now, so, I will see you later, Bri."

Went on like that for the better portion of a week.

Mum was getting more an' more suspicious by the day.

Was worth it to see Principal Bitch get what's comin' to her.

Girl busted me over the stupidest shite, someone was bound to do something like this sooner or later.

Fourth day, she slipped and started bleeding.

Alright, something's wrong.

"So, how was it today?" He asked. 

"Somethin's wrong with the curse. Sheila or whatever 'er bloody name is slipped an' started bleeding today. You said she wouldn't die."

"We might've messed somethin' up durin' that..."

"Goddammit."

"Relax, I'm sure it'll be fine."

"You're sure what'll be fine?" Mum asked, showing up out of nowhere and closing the door behind her. "Nothin', Love. Bri was just asking about a school project she's having trouble with," Dad lied.

"Uh-huh. Like you're the one that she should go to for school problems."

"What're you tryna say, that I'm a bad influence or somethin'? You want bad influence, talk t' Zed, Love."

"What did you guys do?" She asked, deadly serious. "Nothing! I swear t- we did nothing!"

"Llet eht hturt," she chanted.

Now I am glad that I'm immune to Mum's magic.

"Mum, we did nothing, I swear to God."

"Still not convinced. You're a liar, just like your father. Besides, you're sort of immune to my magic. Nummos," she chanted, a jar appearing in her hands. Is that a truth bug? 

"We didn't do jack shi—"

It flew into my mouth. "This is nasty," I commented. "How about now, Bri?"

"Dad, Aunt Zed, and I cast a bad luck curse on my principal and the two of them might've messed up a part of the curse and it's kind of getting out of control, Dad promised it wouldn't kill Principal Jackson but she started bleeding yesterday," I said fast, not being able to get around the magic. "Dammit!!"

"SABRINA ELIZABETH CONSTANTINE-ZATARA! YOU ARE IN SO MUCH TROUBLE, I SWEAR TO—"

"For God's sake, it was Dad's idea! He dared me to do it!"

"JOHN!"

"What? Zed suggested it," he said off-handedly. "And Uncle Chas also warned you that Mum wouldn't be happy," I added. "Oi, shut it, Bri."

"You better fix this, Johnny. And get that damn truth bug out of Brina, who knows what kind of chaos she could cause if she's not lying like she usually does."

"Yes, Love." Dad shot off in a string of Latin, and then the bug came flying out of my mouth and back into the jar. "That was... not pleasant."

"Not supposed to be, honey. Now, you are in so much trouble."

"We'll fix it tomorrow, swear by it," Dad told her.

Don't know if he's lying.

But, that truth bug's flying around that jar like there's no tomorrow, so, I'm guessing he's lying.

"You better fix this, Conjob. Or I don't know what I'll do. Am I understood?"

"Yes, Mum."

"I hope you know that the only reason why the both of you aren't being hexed right now is because you are my family."

"Yes, Zee." Mum walked out of the door, and Dad turned to me. "Why is it that Mum busts us every bloody time we pull something?"

"She's a magician, Love. She's got her ways. Besides, she's been married t' me for eleven years, she knows how to sort out the liars from the truth-tellers."

Slept the worst that night.

Next morning, Dad woke me up. "Alright. We've gotta fix whatever we caused on accident. C'mon." He pulled me out of bed and then we teleported over to Principal Bitch's location, because that's what we need to do, apparently.

She was walking down the street like a normal person, I guess.

Then someone was moving a bloody piano outside their window.

Oh, no.

It started falling, and Principal Jackson was right under the thing. "ETATIVEL!" I heard yelled.

Mum.

"You better fix this. Now."

"Alright, alright, I will."

Another few hours until we ended the curse.

Turns out, Aunt Zed put a little too much of some cursed item that ended up heightening the spell to damnation instead of minor injuries on accident.

"Now that you two fixed this near-death experience, Sabrina, you are in for the grounding of your life, young lady."

Chapter Text

"Yeah, we'll be there. You don't need my ki- Alright. You need everyone else we usually have watch over them there? You- do you need the Legends? No? Okay. Great. We'll drop them off on the Waverider," I heard Mum say to someone on the phone. She hung up and turned to us. "Hey, Brina, your dad and I have a few things we need to deal with on League business. You and your siblings are going to go on the Waverider with your Auntie Sara, okay?"

"Mum, I'm fifteen, I've nicked shite from Lucifer bloody Morningstar, I can handle whatever you're dealin' with, alright? An' I'm not five, so, you can stop talkin' t' me like I am."

"Get your siblings," she said, ignoring me. "Right." Walked over to where Robin was, Ally's room. I knocked and opened the door. "Oi. We're goin' t' the Waverider. Mum an' Dad are doin' some League shi—" I started before remembering that Ally was four and my parents probably didn't want me to be cursing in front of her. "I mean... stuff, and don't want me goin'. Or you, for that matter."

"Will do."

"Great."

He came out a minute later with our sister. "Alright, let's move."

Mum opened a portal and we came out to the familiar bridge of the Waverider.

"Woah, woah, woah, what the hell?" Nate asked. "Sara."

"What's going on?"

"The League called for me and John, and we need someone to watch over the kids. Can you?"

"Of course. No promises that they won't get into any trouble, though, cause, they probably will. Specially Brina."

"Long as they're safe and away from whatever life-threatening danger Bruce's pulling us into this time, I couldn't care what minor trouble they get in."

"Great. Don't worry, I'll pull Ray out if we do have a mission to help to watch over your kids."

"Thank you," Mum told Aunt Sara with a smile on her face. "Don't die, okay? I don't know what I would do without my best friend."

"Aw, thanks, Sara," Dad told her. "Or her cocky, suicidal husband," Sara added.

I laughed and Dad shot me a glare. "What? It's the truth, John. You are cocky, rude, aggressive, hot, pretty much everything that attracts enemies."

"Oh, so you think I'm hot, eh, Lance?"

"Why- why else do you think I slept with you in that mental asylum in '37 in a middle of a mission, John?" Sara asked. "What...? You slept with—"

"Yeah, that was an awkward one to deal with, I'm glad you weren't on the ship then, cause that would've been twenty times worse."

"You know- you know what, I think John and I have to go. Johnny, sweetie, we've got to go now," Mum said hastily. "Yep. Let's go do- do that." Mum and Dad walked through the portal, and Sara turned to the three of us. "Alright, kids, who's ready for the best babysitting adventure you guys have ever had?"

"I'm fifteen, Sara. No need t' talk to me like I'm Ally or anythin', holy Jesus," I muttered. "Actually, hon, you're fifteen and still my goddaughter, so, I'll talk to you any way I want to. Let me call in the Legends really quick, give me one second."

Here we go.

"Psst. Hey. Cover your ears, Ally."

"Okay, Bri," she said before covering her ears.

"HEY! LEGENDS! JOHN'S KIDS ARE HERE, GET OUT OF YOUR ROOMS!" Sara yelled at the top of her lungs.

"Why do you not just call them on the intercom like when I was on the ship when I was eight? Less yelling for you, less ear damage for Robin n' Ally, win-win, Love."

"You still remember being on the Waverider when you were eight?"

"Of course. That's when I could get away with literally everything an' anything that I wanted. Only thing I couldn't do was murder someone. Then Dad headed off the ship an' I went back to havin' a semi-normal childhood with a bedtime an' shi—... stuff like that."

Dammit, did it again.

"Semi-normal, being fighting with demons?"

"Nope, I started fightin' two years ago. Dad just told me that demons and ghosts were real after I got kidnapped by someone when I was six... Dad and Mum yelled at another guy, but, I can't remember his name right now..." (this is before the He's Coming trio chapters. That happened when bri was 16 and here she's 15)

Sara froze. 

What the...

That never happens.

"'Ey, what's poppin', Bri? How's my favorite little rockstar doin', eh?" Charlie asked, emerging from the door. "Hi, Charlie," I said with a smile. "Hey, kids!"

Aw, great. It's Ray.

Note the sarcasm.

Out of all of the Legends, Raymond bloody Palmer is my least favorite.

"Hi, Uncle Ray," all three of us said. "Awe, hi, how's my favorite niece?" He asked Ally. "Scuse me, I'm right here, ya know."

"You cuss him out. Ally gives him hugs,"  Aunt Nora pointed out.

"Yeah, I'm not a little kid. I was living on this bloody thing for two years, if you forgot, you should like me better."

"Oh, I definitely haven't forgotten that. You lifted at least $800 worth of stuff from my room and off of me."

"What?"

"You were seven."

"Your point? I stole stuff from Lucifer last year with my dad."

"You were fourteen last year, Sabrina."

"Whatever. You need your bloody money back, sorry. Spent it on hair dye already. Aren't y' supposed to be a billionaire or sum', anyway?"

"Well, just because I'm a billionaire doesn't mean it's free real estate to steal from."

"You didn't wanna get stolen from, mate, keep your bloody valuables close t' ya an' maybe don't let the kid you know that likes to steal sh—" I trailed off again. "I seriously gotta stop doin' that, yloh tihs," I muttered to myself. "Maybe don't let the kid you know that likes to steal stuff near your stuff, yeah?"

"What's going on?" Mick grunted. "Oh, nothin' out of the usual, Mickey. Pretty Boy Raymond an' Aunt Nora were jus' grilling me for what I did when I was eight."

"I thought I asked you to call me Uncle."

"Mm, ask if I care, Pretty Boy."

"Yeah, I like definitely John better," Mona said off-handedly, coming into the Bridge. I rolled my eyes. "Yeah, an' I like Mick writing the Rebecca Silver novels, but, yet, Love, 'ere we bloody are. Hell, I prefer that Carjacked novel to your new rubbish."

"Can you try to not cuss in front of your sister? I don't know how things work at Constantine's house, but, on the Waverider, I'd like you to n—"

"When did I ever say a cuss word, Aunt Ava?"

"Oh, so you call her Aunt?"

"She's actually scary at times, Pretty Boy," I shot back. "Look, just- just try to watch your language, okay?"

"Hello, children, the Dragon Girl has arrived," I heard.

Aw, great.

My least-favorite Legend behind Ray.

I rolled my eyes, and Robin did, too.

Glad he's in the same boat as me.

"Auntie Zari!!"

Of course Ally is obsessed with her.

Naturally.

"Awe, hey, kid. How you doing?" She asked. "I'm doing great!!!"

"Sorry to interrupt, Legends, but, there is a timequake in London, 1978. It seems that in what appeared to be a normal Black Sabbath concert, a massacre happened from a displaced assassin in the middle of it," Gideon informed.

Charlie's eyes lit up and so did mine.

"Let's bloody go," both of us said.

"Ray, stay on the ship with John's kids," Sara directed. "You bloody daft? I want t' come 'long. Leave Robin an' Ally back, I don't know, but, London in '78 sounds like a blast, an' no way in bloody Hell am I bein' left behind."

"We can't afford to watch over you kids while we're doing the mission, so, Robin, stay on the ship with your sister, but, you don't know how t—"

"Oh, for God's sake, I'll watch them. We need someone to QB and... woman the comms anyway."

"Ava, are you sure?"

"Of course I am. They're not Sabrina, they should be easy enough to handle."

Sara shrugged. "Let's go, then. Thanks for taking babysitting duty, Babe," she thanked. "Course. Good luck."

"Gideon, plot a course for London, 1978, please."

"Right away, Captain."

"Oh, Robin and Ally? Might want to hold onto something."

I smiled.

My favorite part.

BLAST OFF, YA WANKERS!

"Okay, we're probably going to need two to stay behind. Any takers?"

"Don't look at me. I hate kids. All of them," Mick grunted. "Ay, I wouldn't miss goin' t' a Sabbath con' for the world. Don't you dare put me on babysittin' duty, not on this mission, Love."

"Nora?"

"Yeah, why not? I'll do it. Ray deserves a break from watching over the little demons. I'll take it. Besides, I have experience with kids, I'm sure we'll be fine."

"Thanks. Alright, Legends, grab your fishnets and your guitars, we're going to 70's London."

Fabrication room.

Honest-to-God favorite part of the whole thing.

Dunno why Dad hates doing that part.

Even if it's mostly just the same bloody thing as I normally wear.

Fishnets, black and red pleated skirt, black crop top, skull and heart choker, and my usual black leather jacket.

Long story short:

What I walk out of the house in.

I'll blend right the bloody hell in with the crowd.

Specially with my hair, thank you, Father.

Dyed it red with some black highlights.

Change it every two months to a year, I seriously love my parents for letting me do that.

Thank God the fabricator takes care of makeup too.

"Alright, team, let's go."

Walked in on Sabbath playing 'Paranoid'.

God, this is the good shit.

Can't beat the oldies.

"What're we supposed t' look for, again?" I asked. "Anything suspicious."

"Have you noticed where we are, Sara?! Everything looks suspicious here! I should've stayed on the stupid ship with John's kids and Ava," Zari exclaimed, mumbling that last part. "'Ey, this looks like where I spend most of my time, so, tread carefully, yeah?"

"Oh, so that's why you smell like peasant."

"You shagged my dad for a few months, I think you should be used t' the smell of "Peasant" by now, slag."

"I'm- I'm sorry, what's a... slag?"

I rolled my eyes.

"Alright, Legends, let's just split up, yeah? Zari, stay with Sabrina, everyone else, go off on your own, if you find anything, report it immediately, I do not want any mishaps happening, alright?"

"I get- Ah, you've gotta be- I get stuck with—"

"Better her than Ray. Don't complain," Sara cut me off. "Hey!"

"What? She doesn't like you, I respect that. Besides, I don't need you hexed."

"Why put me with the slag, then?" I asked. "I'm just as bloody likely to hex her."

"If you do hex me, don't you dare touch my hair, witch."

"That's s'possed t' be the point, Love," I reminded with a smirk. "C'mon. Let's split up. You see anything that's not normal and out-of-place for a rock concert, you tell me, okay?"

"Yes, ma'am."

We all split up, and Zari and I went to the back, near the bathrooms. "So. How's the house?" She asked. "Ah, well, even if there were somethin' t' tell, well, I wouldn't be spillin' t' some slag that slept with my dad for a few months, now, would I, Zari?"

"Would you stop calling me a slag? I don't know what the hell that is, I'm guessing something along the lines of bitch?"

"Try whore."

"You're more rude than your father, you know that, right?"

"As bloody expected, y' wanker." The two of us caught sight of a couple making out. "Think that counts as out-of-the-ordinary?"

"Nah, that's regular, slag."

"Would you stop-" I saw a person dressed in black robes and the such.

Definitely out-of-place.

"Oi, shut it, minger. I just saw a person that doesn't look like they should be 'ere. Call it in."

"Are you sure?"

I cocked my head towards the lad. "Who would dress like they're part of a cult at a Sabbath concert? The lad had a touch of sense, they would be dressed somewhat like me."

"Ah. English?"

I rolled my eyes. "That guy there looks like he doesn't belong. Call it."

"Yep." She tapped her comm. "Hey, so, miniature, genderbent John saw someone that looks out-of-place. No need to panic, but-"

Then he started coming towards us.

"The guy is walking towards us, some backup would be a little nice..."

Zari turned to me. "Sara and Ray are on the way."

"Thank God."

And then I turned back and saw the guy standing there. "Oh, hey... personal space, buddy..."

He pulled out a dagger from his coat.

"Aw, shit, Zari, we've gotta run!"

"Oh, calling me Zari, now?"

"Would you jus' run? I got this covered!"

She was speechless.

"Holy shite, just get the bloody hell out of 'ere! As much as my mum an' I hate ya, I don't want you t' die!" I yelled. "Sara, how far away are you?!"

I waved a hand over my body and turned into the lovely suit that Uncle Cisco made me. "Time t' die, arsehole."

(Artist rendition of what Sabrina would loosely look like in the chapter titled "Lucy" from my friend @__.this_is_a_bored_artist._ on Instagram. BTW she doesn't read it I just sent her a long ass Insta DM-)

Chapter Text

"Time t' die, arsehole."

"Sa-... Starblazer! Get back down here!" Ray yelled. Well, at least he didn't give away my secret identity. "Fastest way t' get shite done round here, Pretty Boy!" I called back. "This type of action could have catastrophic effects on the timeline! Imagine what—"

"Ask if I give a bloody flying shag!" I interrupted. Not in the bloody mood right now. "Sara, she's not listening to me!"

I pulled the bastard up into a magical bubble, slowly suffocating him as people around us started screaming.

Honestly. I don't know what they're all so scared of.

They're punkers, they should be able to take some weird shite.

I felt a gust of wind almost break my spell. I whipped my head around. "What the bloody hell, Zari?!"

"Get control over yourself!"

"What? This wanker was gonna murk these people, I might as well do the same t' him!"

"That is not how we— Sara, just get here and control the trainwreck, please."

"I jus' don't know why I can't do the same to the bastards that they're gonna do to hundreds of other people if we let them live!"

"Because, then what difference does it make them from us?"

"Oh, I don't bloody know, maybe the fact that when given the chance, we actually bloody save the world instead of destroying it?!"

"Look, what you're doing right now could end up with a million other people dead in present-time!"

"When you're going through time, you need to be a scalpel, not a chainsaw."

"This is exactly why the two of you are my least favorite Legends! Bloody buzzkills," I muttered the last part. "She's batshit crazy! I love it!" Mick shouted over the sound of magic. "Elizabeth!"

Only one person I know calls me that...

I turned to see Sara. "Come back to me. Please."

I fell to the ground. "I'm sorry..."

"Don't be, sweetie. Everyone loses control every now and then."

Then the bastard started to run. "Oh, no, I don't think so, bloody wanker. PART!" I opened a portal under him and it sucked him into an alternate dimension I have open, just in case if I ever needs to trap someone for a few minutes. It's their own personal Hell. A little something that I picked up from one of Dad's contacts. I had to swear to never use it.

Good thing I'm used to breaking swears.

"Alright, I just bought us a few minutes. It's gonna be ten minutes until that bloody dimension of mine collapses and he comes back. What's the plan?"

"Get as many people out of here as we can that hasn't already ran for the hills, or we can simply take him out. Can you get us into that dimension that you sent the assassin to?" Sara asked.

"Yeah, but, I'll be way vulnerable. Never tried more than two people before. Never had any bloody reason to. I've only had to teleport two cock-sucking slags who decided t' pick  fight with me."

"Wait, you did what?!"

"I was getting two-v-one'd, what did ya want me t' do?"

"For God's sake, jus' pull Sara in there! She'll kick the assassin's arse, come back out, we'll be good!" Charlie yelled. "Fine. TROPELET!"

The members of Black Sabbath and the remaining audience members stared in awe as my blue and gold magic surrounded Sara and then, she disappeared.

I fell to my knees again with a cry of pain, a significant amount of energy taken from my body. "Bollocks," I muttered. "Oh, my God, are you al-"

"I'm fine, Pretty Boy," I cut him off, swatting his hand away. "I can get up by myself, thank y' very much, mate."

~Back on the Waverider, Ava's PoV~

"What was that?" I asked, hearing someone cry out in pain. "That sounded like... Sabrina! Is she okay?!" Robin exclaimed.

"Is- is Sabrina okay?"

"Well, she's feeling fine enough to still call me Pretty Boy and shoo me away, so, I'm assuming, yes."

"No, I'm still not convinced. What did she do?"

"What did Sabrina do?" I repeated. "She almost killed our assassin," Zari informed. "Woah, what the—"

"Is Bri Bri okay?" Ally asked. "Nora, get Ally out of the bridge."

"What do you want us to do instead?!"

"I don't know, I'm not a kid person! All I know is that she shouldn't be hearing that her sister almost... did that."

"Constantine's her dad. He probably talks about damnation, going to Hell, demons, and a lot of other stuff on the regular that a kid shouldn't be hearing."

"He does," Robin confirmed offhandedly. "Well, that's not healthy. Can you please bring Ally away from the conversation, regardless? Thank you, Nora."

"Will do. Alright, kid, what do you wanna do, huh?"

"Can I learn magic?"

"Last time one of Constantine's children tried learning magic on the ship, Sara ended up under a love spell for Nate and Zari was convinced that she was a pig with wings," I recalled with a half-laugh. "Hard pass, thanks." It was funny to see Zari roll around in mud, but, at the same time, it was not fun to see my girlfriend trying to sleep with Nate.

"Sorry, kid. I can try to show you some magic, though. I'm a fairy godmother, did you know that?"

Ally gasped. "You are?!"

"Yeah, I am! Want me to show you some tricks?"

"Yeah!!!"

A second of silence passed. "Alright, hon, hold on right, I'm being summoned right now."

"What?! No- hold on, Nora—"

Then the two of them disappeared in a cloud of blue sparkles. "DAMMIT, NORA!"

"Why are you being all angry and stuff?" Robin asked. "You know- you know what, that bit's not important. Why is Sabrina—"

"I'M FINE!"

"And there's the signature angry yell that says that she's not really fine. She does that when she's close to being burnt out."

"What did she do?"

"Almost killed the assassin, then Sara brought her back down, then she teleported the assassin into some alternate dimension or something like that, and then Sara followed to beat them."

"Oh."

~Sara's PoV~

"This is trippy... wait... where am I?"

I took a closer look at the robe.

League of Assassin wardrobe.

The assassin took off their hood.

What the... GARY?!

"Gary?!"

"la 'aelam ean hadha... Ghari aladhi tatahadath eanhu." (I know not of this... Gary you speak of.)

Oh, he's speaking Arabic.

Alright, then.

Been a while.

*switches to Arabic*

"What Earth are you from? Also, I have not spoken this language for a long time, it does not feel natural anymore."

"Witchcraft. There cannot be more than one Earth in the universe."

"John Constantine. Do you know him?"

"I do know one that goes by that name," he mentioned. "Keep going, buddy..."

"A strong warlock."

"Yep."

"But, he has passed on from this plane of existence."

"What the... alright, man, who do you work for? Cause, you were about to cause a lot of trouble that must require a lot of training."

"Long live the Demon's Head."

League of Assassins.

~Sabrina's PoV~

"I don't know how much bloody longer I can hold this!"

"Then let go, Love!" Charlie insisted. "I- I can't! Not everyone's out yet!"

"Hold on!" Charlie ran and pulled on the fire alarm.

That did the trick. "Look, Dave, Tony, I know this is weird, but, I'm gonna need the two of you t' get out."

The two Sabbath members floored out with the rest of the crowd. "Let go, Love!" She commanded once everyone was out of the place.

I let everything out with a pained scream, and then Sara and some other muppet tumbled out, and I fell to the ground. Gary?" All of them said. Huh. Guess they know him. "Not Gary. Apparently, he's from a different Earth. He knows who John is, but, apparently, he's "passed on from this plane of existence," I think that means he died. Is he dead? Can someone check?"

I closed my eyes and focused on his aura. Mum told me about this trick. There's a way you can psychically feel someone's aura. Luckily, I know how to do that perfectly.

A clear imprint of him and Mum fighting a hoard of demons came into my mind. "Yeah, he's alive. Still kickin' fighting alongside Mum."

"Great. How do we get him back to his... dimension, or whatever?" Zari asked. "We need my parents for that one, Slag."

"Would you stop—"

"Slag. A British expression having the same meaning as the American word, slut, otherwise known as whore," the assassin informed. Well, that's one way to put it. "You- you could speak English this whole time?!"

"But, of course. The League of Assassins teach in every language possible on the face of the Earth."

"Why do you feel the need to call me a... that again?"

"Lowly shit, be glad I'm not cussing you out. If I wasn't so scared of Aunt Ava an' Sara, I might. So, jus' be glad I'm not, yeah, Zari?"

"Lowly? Lowly?! You call 51 Million followers on CatChat lowly?!"

"We need my parents for that one. I can open a dimensional portal, but not for long. An' not to mention it's small as shite, I can barely throw a bloody marble through to another dimension, let alone a god bloody assassin. I can call in a favor or two with the blokes that don't hate me—"

"A slim selection, I wager," Zari interrupted. "Oi, shut it, bloody shrew. Like I was sayin', I could pull that in, but, not sure how much I can trust 'em, even if I call it even with them if they help me with that. Why can't we jus' bring the nutter on the ship or somethin' an' flash 'im once we're about t' send him back?" I asked out of pure curiosity. "English?"

"For God's..! Why can't we just take this idiot back onto the Waverider and memory flash him before we send him back to his dimension?"

"Thank you. Now, can you talk like that all the time, please? It's so much easier to understand," Zari requested. "Not gonna happen, scrubber. Now, why can't we do that again?"

"Because... because..." Sara trailed off. "Actually, that's not a bad idea. Ava, get the ship." Sara removed her finger from her comm piece. "Deck him."

"My bloody pleasure," I said with a smirk, pulling my fist back and punching him straight in the face. "That's my job," Mick grunted.

"Well, do it first, yeah, Mickey, mate?"

"Shut it," he responded. I pulled the wanker's body over my shoulder.

I might be a thin one under 100 pounds, but, I can hold my weight. "You sure you got that, Sabrina?"

I rolled my eyes. "Yes, I've bloody got this, Pretty Boy Rayond. Let's go." We went back onto the ship. "Wait, where's my sister?" I asked, seeing that she wasn't there. "Oh, um..."

Then the familiar feel of my parents' magic filled the room.

A portal opened, and the two of them came out, bruises and burned off clothes, skin, and hair frequent.

Sheesh.

"What happened to the two of you? You look like you just came out of Hell. And, yes, I know what that place looks like."

"I think the better question is, young lady, why do you have an unconscious guy on your back that looks like he belongs in a cult?" She asked. "And where is my other child?"

"Oh, um, Zatanna, I can- I can explain."

"Get. Explaining."

"Okay, so... Ally went with Nora to go do her fairy godmother business."

"Why?!"

"I didn't want her hearing something that was happening during the- the mission..."

"What. Mission."

"Some assassin was stuck in—"

"Is that Gary?" Dad asked. "Nope, his doppelganger."

"Thought those didn't exist anymore."

"They actually do, they're just not... there's just less Earths. This just so happens to be Gary's doppelganger."

"Wait, my doppelganger?" I heard.

I just dropped the wanker.

"Oh, my God, you just dropped him on t—"

"Yeah, I dropped him. Sorry."

"Is that... my doppelganger? Oh, my God, that's- that's me!!! Does he have my memories? Does he- does he know any secrets to the universe? For God's- oh, my God!"

"So, this is Gary, huh? Way too much energy for me. No wonder I like Aunt Barbara the least," I muttered under my breath. "Hey, watch it, those are my high school best friends."

"Alright, let's get this muppet home."

"You still haven't answered my question. What mission?"

"Shortly after the two of you left, I detected a change in the timeline. In London, 1979 during a Black Sabbath concert, an assassin that I thought was displaced in time went on a killing spree, killing everyone, including the members themselves. The Legends went to go take care of it while Miss Sharpe and Miss Dahrk stayed on the ship to look after Robin and Allison."

"I- thank you, Gideon," Mum thanked. "My pleasure, Miss Zatara."

"Okay, and then after that, once they found the assassin, Sabrina went a little bit overboard and tried to kill the assassin by choking him."

Mum shot me a glare. "I'm sorry, okay?!"

She sighed. "As much as I love you guys, you let Sabrina get away with far too much stuff. Why did you not kill him again?"

"Aunt Sara pulled me back."

"Good. Anyone else try doing anything?"

"Mum, it's not like I was out-of-control or anything, I was simply tryin' a new approach. But, t' answer your question, yes, but it did nothin'. Mick jus' said I was batshit crazy an' that he loved it, so..."

"Weasel! Tattletale!"

"Calm down, mate, it's fine."

Zee shot him a glare. "So, they called it in, and then I asked Nora to lead Ally out of the room, then she got called by whoever she's serving, and that's why."

"So, you're telling me that you were in complete control when you almost killed a man?" Mum asked. "Yeah, what? Speakin' of, can we get 'im back t' his original universe?" I asked in return, changing the subject. "Fine. John, you do that. I'm going to find my daughter. Well, the one that doesn't like to cause trouble, anyway."

Damn, thought I would've gotten a lot worse than that, seein' as I almost killed a bloke.

"And you're not off the hook yet, young lady."

Dammit.

Chapter Text

"Bloody crazy, you lot are," I said in disbelief after we came back from a mission with the Legends before noticing a gash in my clothes, one that pretty much tore my shirt in half.

Dammit!

"Shite."

I looked over at the rest of the Legends. "Who made your suits? Cos, they're pretty dope."

"Cisco," all of them answered. "Myself," Mick grunted.

"Alright, I'm goin' to Uncle Cisco's then. When are my parents s'possed t' pick me up again?"

"Now," Aunt Ava told me before a portal opened and my parents stepped through. "Alright, hon, let's go home."

"Yep, coming!"

I stepped through the portal to Robin doing his homework and Ally playing with her dolls. "Brina, I can see your bra," he noted, looking up from his textbook for a second.

"Sorry." I moved a hand over my shirt and made it complete again. "Can I pay a visit t' Uncle Cisco an' Aunt Kamila?"

"Yeah, no."

"Why not?"

"You're fifteen."

"I- what if I just want t' visit my auntie and uncle?"

"You're not that type of person, Bri. I have your father to thank for that. You're fine enough with what you are wearing right now."

"You started when you were thirteen. Dad started when he was... what, twelve? Besides, didn't Dick start when he was eleven? You all had suits then, I've been doing this for two years and only wearing black cloaks that you two pulled from when you were fighting those Cult of the Cold Flame wankers. C'mon. It's bout time."

"Answer's still no. And, you will address your parents' friends as Auntie or Uncle. That's rude to not do that."

"Mum, he's literally thirteen years older than me."

"Doesn't matter." It was quiet for a second or two. "Don't you have that math homework to do?"

"Yeah, don't remind me. Bloody Algebra's a bloody bitch."

"Sabrina! Language!"

"Relax. Ally, Love, you didn't hear anything. Got it?"

"Okay!"

"See, Mum?"

"Just go do your homework, Sabrina."

Fell asleep a little bit after I finished my stupid homework.

The whole following week, my parents were acting so weird.

Robin, too.

Actually, Ally as well.

What the bloody hell's goin' on?

The next Tuesday, I woke to William, Jen, Lyta, and Mia standing there as well as my parents and my siblings. "WHAT THE BLOODY-" I shouted, about to shoot off a spell at them before realizing that it was my friends and my family.

"Happy birthday, Bri!"

"What the hell? It's my birthday today..?" I muttered.

I can't remember the last time I celebrated my birthday.

Every year we've had something come up.

A demonic invasion, a nuclear war, some bastard getting resurrected with a major blood lust, anythin' along those lines.

Last time I celebrated my birthday was...

I was six..?

"Yes, it's your birthday today, hon."

"Aight, great. appreciate the lot of you droppin' in an' the sort, but, I'm not... big on birthdays. How'd you even find out?"

"Is it too much to ask for a day off?" Mum asked, helping me up out of bed. "Don't I got school today or somethin'?" I asked in return, waving a hand over my body and fixing my outfit, hair, and makeup in one go.

Black ripped jeans, red off-the-shoulder crop, black leather jacket, upside-down cross choker.

Black lipstick, mascara, gradient eyeshadow, everything.

And my hair was the easiest, I just brushed it out and straightened the silver-dyed shite out, all of which I did in less than five seconds.

Thank God I have magic.

"Your father may or may not have set your school on fire."

"What the...?! Dad, someone could've gotten hurt," I told him as I locked another choker onto my neck, a pentagram one.

"Don't worry, no one was hurt."

Mum shot him a glare. "John," she said sternly.

"Alright, no one died. Let's put it that way. Alright?"

"I'll repeat myself: What the bloody hell?!"

"Happy birthday, Love. Don't got school for the next few days. Your mum'll fix it after... this... next week, as she does with most of my messes. C'mon, let's get a move on with the day, yeah?"

"You set my- you do realize that I haven't celebrated my birthday for more than fifteen minutes since I was six, correct?" I asked. "It's your sixteenth, Love. Let's get goin'. Get out of bed."

"What- wh- the Queen siblings, Lyta, Jen, what're they doin' here?"

"We are here because we are your best friends, and we wouldn't miss this for the world. Okay? Get that in your head, we're not leaving you alone on your birthday. It's your sixteenth, so, my mom made an exception. Yayá wasn't as excited, but, Mom talked her out of it," Lyta told me with a smile.

"Jen... what- Gotham Academy, you're..."

"Mom understood, Dad didn't. He's... mad, to say the least, but, I'll live. Either way, I'm here, that's what matters."

"Mia, Will, Star City..."

"Our dad just doesn't give a shit. Mom just told us that as long as we could answer a few basic questions, we could come here. Obviously, we could. So, what's the plan? Get into trouble?" Mia answered. "And that's why I like you, Queen."

"Hey, right here."

"Mm, bad influence on my daughter, I definitely like your sister better."

"Bad influ- excuse you, that's my brother you're talking about."

"Oh yeah? An' what're you gonna do, Queen, fight me?"

"I'm not sure if you want to pick that fight, actually. I was trained by Nyssa Al Ghul."

"Ask if I care. You're still vulnerable to magic. Don't matter how much trainin' you've got from some assassin, it's a bit hard to fight when you're dead. You're human, I can still murk your arse."

"How I married you is beyond me. John, you act worse than Ally."

"Not sayin' much, Love. You sure she's my kid? Girl's a literal angel."

"I- All Allison didn't do is set a demon's pants on fire."

"Well done, Bri, by the way."

"Wait, what?" All of my friends asked. "Oh, yeah. My first spell, I set some bloke's pants on fire cos he insulted my dad. I was... what, seven months old?"

"Okay, I have so many questions. You're going to tell us the whole story."

"I plan on."

(For those of y'all that are getting confused with ages, Mia is 12-13, William's 16, Hippolyta and Jennifer are both 11, Jen's younger by a little bit, she just turned 11. Not everyone here had children at 17-18 except for Oliver/Felicity. Rachel/Damian were 19, Felicity/Oliver were 18-19 for William and 22-23 for Mia, and Diana was 318 😂 (I'm sorry that just sounds so weird-) anyway, I DO NOT PROMOTE TEEN PREGNANCY, USE PROTECTION PLZ)

"I need some water. Hold on."

I walked out of the room to get myself a glass of water or something, and came to the Legends plus a few of my favorite Aunts and Uncles standing outside the door. "Happy birthday, sweetheart!"

"Thanks, Aunt Sara."

Mom gave me a hug. "There gonna be another apocalypse this year?" I asked. "I mean, you were sort of born on Friday the 13th. And October, at that. Cultists always choose this time of year to try and pull some shit. Relax. I'm sure they have to take a break, sooner or later. Besides, even if we do have something to take care of, I'm sure it'll be quick."

"Not like I can go out an' fight, anyway. I don't have any suit to go out in."

"Oh, that's right. I do have something for you." She summoned a box out of the air and handed it to me.

There was a card on top.

"Oh, thanks, Mum..."

Dear Bri,

Happy 16th! We both love you, so much. We don't see you nearly enough, we'll be sure to visit soon! We know that we aren't your favorites, but, please know that we do want the best for you. Hope you have an amazing day, don't get into too much trouble, okay?

Love,

Uncle Cisco and Aunt Kamila

P.S. Don't tear up the present too much, please

I gently placed the card on the ground and opened the present, seeing a black fabric sitting there. "Is this what I think it is..?"

"See for yourself."

I pulled the outfit out completely, and then I almost dropped it.

"Oh, my fucking- I love this!"

(In all honesty, I completely forgot where I got this picture- I legit got this back pretty much a month ago, while I was writing 'Dare You' (published on Jul. 27) I saw this and said ASFJPOSDJIOPDSJFVCVDSFJPSADJIWEP WITCH OUTFIT GIMME GIMME SABRINA HON YOU'VE GOT A NEW COSTUME)

"Remind me to wear this later today, holy shit, this is awesome."

"I'm glad you enjoy it, Love."

"Why- I- I thought you said I was too young. Why'd you have Uncle Cisco make this for me?" I asked.

"Your father made some good vocal points."

"Not my fault you'll agree to anythin' as long as I'm fucking you," Dad muttered. Mum shot him a glare. "Sorry, just sayin' the truth. Now, c'mon. We've got some trouble t' get into."

The rest of my friends came out of my room. "Oh, hey, your friends are here as well. The more the merrier. Let the Legends show you how to get into some trouble. Waverider's right outside. C'mon."

Everyone else walked out except for me, William, and Mia.

"Hold on, just one second, Bri," he said, gently holding onto my wrist.

I turned around. "Hey, what's going on?"

He moved a piece of hair away from my face, then behind my ear. "There. Now, you're ready. You look perfect, you know that?"

I smiled, a sweet, small, genuine smile I don't show often, before he pressed his lips to mine, sweet, soft, and absolutely perfect. (And yes, I realize that William is gay in the Arrowverse, but, obviously, this is different)

It lasted a second, then he pulled away.

"Oh, yeah, let him touch your hair all he wants, but when I try, you threaten to send my soul to one of your dad's friends," Mia grumbled. "Yeah, well, you and him are a bit different," I reminded, still holding hands with William.

"Obviously."

Then Dad cleared his throat. "Ahem."

"Sorry," I apologized, dropping my hand away from William's instantly, walking out of my dad's flat in Liverpool and seeing the Waverider there.

"Okay, that thing's real, right?" Jen asked. "Of course it i-... you've never been on the Waverider before, huh?"

"No I have not."

"You're certainly in for a treat, then."

I led her and the rest of my friends aboard, and then we took them for a tour along the Waverider, where I spent a lot of my childhood. (Ok so I've gotten a few people confused as to how long they spent on the Waverider and who raised who for Rob/Sabrina, so, basically, John joined the Legends when Sabrina was almost 8, shortly after she met William. He stayed until s7 of Legends, 4 years. During that time, the Legends and JC raised Sabrina. I'm going to probably elaborate why the two of them decided that they should break up/sort-of divorce later, probably in the next two or so chapters after this next two-parter and another solo chapter. (1st part of the duo chapter's done, and I have a pretty clear idea of how I'm gonna do the next solo chapter) Zee raised Robin during those 4 years, which is why Robin's a nice-going not-cussing child.)

And then I showed them the lab. "Oh, this is where my dad was tryna get me to cast a normal spell."

"How'd that turn out?" Jen asked.

"Oh, completely normal, it's just that my godmother ended up under a love spell an' Zari thought that she was... a pig that could fly, was it?"

"Who'd Sara start to try and sleep with?"

"Nate," all of the Legends, plus my dad and I answered. "Yeah, I do not like to be reminded of those times. Can we just move on?"

"Sure."

"Wait, Bri, you- you grew up here?" Will asked.

"Yeah, with all of 'em here as my parents an' secondary parents, give or take a few."

"So, I'd suggest not breaking her heart unless you want to get set on fire," Uncle Mick grunted out. "Did you even go to school?"

"Nate's the reason why I can survive MHS. He taught me in everythin' "useful" in the real world. Math, science, all that."

"What's the scariest experience you've had here?" Robin asked. "Oh, that's right, I haven't really told ya about my time here. When Dad died, definitely," I answered without a second thought.

Mum just stared at Dad. "You died, and you didn't tell me?!"

"Didn't think it was important, Love. Relax."

"Didn't think it was-..?! YOU DIED!" She yelled. "I'm here, aren't I?"

"Mum, Dad, as cute it is to hear you two fight an' the sort, but, I do really want to have some fun," I interrupted before they could start really get to arguing, which would probably end up in them fucking on the walls of the Waverider.

"Right. Sorry, Love. Where do you want t' go?"

"Somethin' involvin' punk, probably along the lines of Clash or Death Angel."

"1980's, here we come."

A smirk formed on my face.

We're gonna get into so much trouble.

Happy bloody birthday to me.

Chapter Text

I woke up with a splitting headache.

Worse than that hangover I had last year during Uncle Jason's birthday.

"Ah, bloody hell," I muttered, looking down and realizing that I wasn't wearing my hero wear.

I looked around. "Where am I?"

Then I took another look at my outfit. "And what in the name of bloody fuck am I wearing?" I asked, seeing that I was now dressed in pink and white.

Pink crop top and a white skirt.

What the hell..?

I reached my hand back to try and touch my hair, expecting it to stop at my neck like it's been for the past half a year, but, it kept going.

"What the bloody..?!"

I hurriedly pulled it in front of my eyes, and instead of the black with blue highlights I had my hair dyed, I found a light blonde strand going down to my waist tinged with lavender.

What was I even doing before this..?

"Mum, what're we bloody doin' here?"

"Your father has some business to attend to."

"Business... so, there's a 60% chance he's gonna die and/or get his soul taken down to Hell?"

"More like 95. Don't worry, he'll come back. He always does."

Next thing I knew, I found myself facing a hoard of demons.

"HSINAB!" I remember yelling.

And then I woke up here.

I stood up and blinked, seeing a building in front of me.

'Merlin's School for the Gifted'

I'd know that name anywhere.

Merlin.

He can probably tell me what the bloody hell's going on with me, why I don't remember even being here, why I changed clothes, why my hair's different, why this world feels different.

Then I stood up and someone ran into me. "Hey! Watch it, arsehole!" Both of us said, a voice I knew quite well meeting my own.

I turned around and saw my father, seventeen or younger, with a bloody cigarette in his mouth and his trench coat that I always see him in.

I froze.

"Dad?"

"Sorry, Love, I'm no one's Dad. Bloody sixteen, hope I'm not. Definitely not yours, Grimm."

"Sorry, what'd you- what'd you just call me?"

"Sabrina. Grimm. That's your name, init?" (Ok I'm sorry, I just had to draw in the person I designed her after- Well, her original/natural appearance, anyway)

Then a car door closed.

"Bye, Daddy! See you after school!"

Mum?!

What the bloody—

Then I saw Robin walk out with her. "What the bloody..?! Robin?!"

"Oh, so you know his bloody name?"

"I know your name, arsehole."

Great, now I can cuss my dad out.

I don't know what's going on, but, hey, it's a free pass to call my dad an arsehole an' get away with it.

"Really now, Love? Cause, you looked like you saw a ghost when you saw me. What, I die in your eyes or somethin'?"

"Worse," I muttered under my breath. "What was that?"

"Nothin'. Think I can get one of those fags, Constantine?"

"There's the name. Sure, Love."

He pulled the pack out and handed me one.

Dad would never let me anywhere near one of his Silk Cuts.

Not after he quite literally died from them.

Wait.

If Dad, Mum, and Robin are here...

Then...

Where's Ally?

"Hey, um—" I asked before he cut me off. "Need a light?"

"Well, yes, but, I also wanted to asking something else."

"Ask away, darling."

"Is there- is there a girl here named Allison? Anne-Marie?"

He cocked an eyebrow at me. "You serious?"

"Yes!"

"The bloody fuck is wrong with you..?"

"Just answer my question."

"Yes, there's some bloody bird named Allison Anne-Marie here. Jus' your most popular girl in school, not to mention daughter of a bloody billionaire, two billionaires, actually, no big bloody deal. What, you been livin' under a rock? Allison bloody fucking Anne-Marie Queen Tarazi, sound familiar?"

"As in, Oliver Queen and Zari Tarazi had a daughter?"

"Try four."

What the fuck?

"Shit, this is weirder than that time last year when I got thrown into another dimension and met my teenage parents," I muttered to myself before I remembered something.

Merlin.

"The- the bloke that runs this school, Merlin."

"Merlin? Merlin? Grimm, the bloke's been dead for years now."

"Who runs the school, then?"

"Ignorant slag," he muttered. "Just answer my question, please."

"Well, either you've been livin' under a rock for the last three years, or you're just ignorant in general."

"I'm gonna go with the second one."

"John Sargent runs this school."

That name sounds familiar...

Wait.

John Sargen—

Sargon the Sorcerer.

Mum's told me about him. He trained Uncle Nick, met Mum a few times.

"Do you- can I meet with him?"

Then Mum and Robin walked out towards us. "And now I've got a pretty bird to tick off an' flirt with. If you'll excuse me, Grimm."

Damn, even where... wherever I am now, it's good to know that Dad's always a lovesick sucker for Mum.

"Hey, back off my sister, Constantine."

What the fuck?

Sister?

"Oh, I see you dragged another poor girl into your smoking habits," Robin noted, motioning to me. "Move out of my way, bitch."

Then I got shoved.

"What the bloody—"

I almost fell. Once I got back on my feet, I came face to face with a girl with black hair, blue eyes, and a whole lot of makeup on.

Even if she's older, I'm always gonna recognize her.

Allison.

Shite, she's rude.

"Ally?"

"Sorry, I don't fraternize with losers. When you're cool, and maybe not wearing that hideous shade of pink to school, come find me, then I might talk to you."

What happened to her?

Aunt Zari bloody happened.

Ally's acting like her.

"Allis- don't you- don't you remember me?"

"I think I would recognize someone with that fashion sense. What's your name again?"

"Sabrina. Bri... I- I'm your sister."

"Yeah, no. Wouldn't be caught dead hanging with you, let alone being related to you. Ugh, the thought makes me shudder."

"I- Ally, what the hell is going on?!"

"Don't fucking ask me, why don't you go ask your boyfriend?"

"Boy- what in the—"

"Constantine."

"Gross. He's my..."

I trailed off, remembering that he said he was sixteen.

Wait.

That means...

He's younger than me..?

"Your what, hook-up friend?"

"Ally—"

"Don't call me that, only my friends and my family is permitted to call me that, you are neither, so you will either address me as Queen, Tarazi, or Allison. Now, get out of my way."

What the hell is going on?

Maybe Mum can help.

Walked over to where Robin and another guy was standing in front of Mum.

I'll say it again:

What the bloody hell is going on here? Where even am I?

"Zach, Robin, chill. I can protect myself just fine. Besides, we have different classes, you can't possibly protect me from him throughout the whole day."

Zach, as in...

Uncle Zach?

Mum never talks about him.

I only know about him because Dad mentioned him once or twice.

Wonder what happened.

"If you say so."

"Thank you. I'd like to have a normal high school experience, not have two helicopter family members over me all the time."

Mum walked in, and I was left standing outside with Robin and Uncle Zach.

"Hey, Robin—"

"What, Grimm?"

Shit, does everyone call me that here?!

It's an amazing name, I'm not going to lie, but still, what the hell?

"Do you- do you remember me?" I asked. "Remember you?"

"Yes, bloody remember me."

"No, sorry."

"Something's not right here."

"What do you mean?"

"Where I'm from, you and I, we're siblings. Allison's our baby sister. John Constantine, Zatanna, they're our parents. Tell me I'm not crazy, tell me that you remember our family. Our uncle, Nick Necro, Ally getting kidnapped, the- the Legends... Jason Blood... Sara Lance... Don't you remember any of them?"

"You're as crazy as that Gary guy. There's no way that Allison Queen is my younger sister, and no way in Hell that my sister and John Constantine get together and have three children."

"Gary! Yes! We- we know him! Tarazi, Ally's... mum, we know her, too! Both of us hate her! Dad's ex-girlfriend while he was on the Waverider with the Legends! Sara Lance, remember them?"

"Nope. Try going to Gary Green."

"'M bloody telling you, we know him! Along with the rest of the Legends! Sara Lance, Mick Rory, Mona Wu, Nate Heywood, Ava Sharpe, Nora Dahrk, don't you remember them?! Diana Prince, don't you remember them?!"

"I don't know what the hell you're talking about. You're absolutely crazy. Like I said, there's absolutely no way that Constantine and Zatanna ever get together."

"I- I know, that's how- that's how it seems, I said the exact same thing last year when we visited them in the past, don't you- don't you remember that? Meeting Kara Danvers, Jessica Cruz, all of our mum's old friends in high school?"

"She is in high school. And she's most definitely not my mom."

"Yeah, I know that, but, you- I can't be the only one that remembers this, right?! Ally- yesterday was her seventh birthday! Please, you've got to remember... please, Robin..."

Then he walked away.

"GODDAMMIT! Rebmemer! For God's sake, REBMEMER!" I yelled. "I don't want to be alone... please, remember, please..." I pleaded, almost crying.

That stopped him, as well as Mum, Dad, and Uncle Zach. "Did you just use backward magic?"

"Dad... Mom...." he breathed.

"Thank you! Now I don't feel like I'm insane!"

"What'd you do, Grimm?" Dad asked. "I'm telling you, I'm not crazy! Zatanna's our mum, Constantine's our dad! I'm bloody telling-"

"No. That's simply not it."

Then the bell rang. "Ah, great. Now I'm late for class."

"Somethin's off, I'm bloody tellin' ya! Class is the least of our- your worries right now! Do you not remember- we were- we were fighting a hoard of demons, we shouted a spell, and then-"

"Yeah, we've gotta go. C'mon. She's off her rocker."

"No, wait, hold the hell on, I actually agree with Sabrina's idea that school isn't important, for once. We should figure out what the actual hell's going on."

"Oh, come on, Rob, not you, too."

"Love, c'mon. Both Grimm an' your cousin are off their bloody rocker," Dad said, pulling Mum away, leaving me and Robin here. "Look, I'm not- I'm not insane. Right? You remember everything. I'm not crazy."

"No. You're not."

"Maybe I can find something in this school. Sargon the Sorcerer, he runs this joint, right?" I asked. "Yes. C'mon."

He pulled me into the building. "Okay, it's not just me, this is weird, right?"

"Having our parents as the same age as us and for us to have our baby sister be the same age as us, along with having her be the daughter of our mom's ex and our dad's ex, well it's just... a lot to unpack there, it's insane."

"Get to class!" Someone yelled. "Bloody fucking hell..."

Then I saw William.

I froze.

"William! Thank G—" 

He glared at me and shoved me aside.

No...

Please...

Not him, too...

There's one thing I want to stay the same, please, let it be my boyfriend...

Everything else, I would've been fine.

But, please, just one thing that would stay the same, even remotely...

Why?

"Bri..."

"Is this Hell?"

"You've been there before, you tell me."

"This is worse than Hell, my own personal one. Let's get out of here, as soon as we can. Please."

"Alright, then, let's meet with Sargon."

"Oh- oh, my God- what are- what're you doing?" I heard. I immediately pulled Robin to the wall and peered around the corner, seeing Mum get pinned to to the wall by Dad.

God, that sounds weird.

Seen it before, multiple times, looks really weird when they're in high school. 

"C'mon, Love, bein' with me, can't be that bad, you've gotta admit."

"You know, this whole... hot, bad boy thing you've got going on... doesn't work on me, Constantine."

"Think I'm hot, eh?"

"General term you're trying to go for. Come on, you've been flirting with me since... 1st grade? I know the real you."

"Mm, then who is it, Zatara?"

Then she kissed him.

On the lips.

Hard.

That caught both me an' Dad off guard.

His arm's place above her head fell out of shock.

"Someone that's not half-bad to be around," she said once she pulled away with a smile after a second before slipping away from him and to her class.

Then I walked over to Dad. "Hey, Da-... Constantine."

Nothing.

"Constan—"

"What?!"

"Dad, please, can you just tell us whe—"

"Alright, look here, Grimm, I'm not interested in your absolutely bloody mental story that I'm your dad an' the bird I fancy is your mum, aight? As nice as that sounds, I'm done talkin' t' mental prats like ya."

"Just tell me the way to Sargent's office."

"Down the bloody hall, first door on your bloody fucking right. Can't miss it. Looks like Hell. This whole bloody joint does."

"Why you here then?"

"Zatanna. Why else would I be in this hellhole?"

"You know what, I- I'm not even going to attempt to understand that."

"You follow William around like a lost puppy," Robin mentioned. "Hey, shut it."

"William, as in... William Palmer?"

"You've gotta be kidding me, bloody hell..."

Of bloody course he has to be the son of the least favorite Legend.

"You know what, I- I don't have time for this. Rebmemer."

"Sorry, Love, was that s'possed t' do somethin'?"

"Yes, that was supposed to fucking do something! Why didn't it work?! WHY DIDN'T IT FUCKING WORK?!"

Chapter Text

"WHY DIDN'T IT FUCKING WORK?!"

"My office, now," a man snarled. Oh, great. Saves me the bloody trouble.

"Who are you?" He questioned after shutting the door. "John Constan-"

"I know who you are, boy, I'm taking to the other two."

"Sabrina. And this is Robin."

"I'm gonna need a little more specific than that."

"Sabrina Constantine-Zatara. Or Grimm, as it turns out here."

"Robin Constantine-Zatara, sir."

"Why?"

"You don't belong here. Neither of you do."

"Finally! Someone that gets that!"

"Where are you from, girl?"

"You're Sargon the Sorcerer, right?" I asked. "I have not used that alias in years."

"I'll take that as a yes. Anyway, I was fightin' some arseholes with my mum an' brother 'ere, an' then we tried banishin' them back, but then I think they shot the spell back at us., sendin' us 'ere. I'm not sure, it's like... it's like my memory is still foggy, but..."

"So, another... dimension, you would say?"

"Yes! Yes, exactly! A dimension where John Constantine is my dad an' Zatanna Zatara is my mum! Allison Anne-Marie, she's our sister!"

"Off your bloody rocker, like I said," Dad muttered while I shot him a glare. "Shut up," I told  him. "Allison Anne Queen, Zatanna Zatara, please come to the headmaster's office, thank you."

They came in not a minute after. "What the hell's going on? I have things to do, and I definitely don't want to be seen with this girl."

"Something's going on here."

"Obviously. No normal person would go to school dressed like that."

"Hey, not choosin' what I wear right now, sunshine. Don't care if you're my sister, I will not hesitate to cuss you out. The only reason why I don't is because you're little. Now, it's free bloody reign. Normally, I look much more badass than... whatever the bloody hell this is."

"Mhm, and why should I believe you?"

"This isn't the point right now. I don't belong here, none of us do. We need to go back. Who knows what kind of damage the world is going through without us."

"Oh, you're significant to the world?"

"I've saved the world every year on my bloody birthday, Tarazi. Hell, I stopped an apocalypse when I was one by setting some bloke's pants on fire. So, I'd suggest not pissin' me off, eh?"

"Why do you talk like me?"

"Cos you raised me. Along with the Legends."

"The Who?"

"Sara Lance, Nate Heywood, Zari Tarazi, Ray Palmer, Nora Dahrk, Ava Lance, Mick Rory, and occasionally Behrad Tarazi. The Legends of Tomorro-... you know what, it's not like you would remember them, anyway. Forget I said anything."

"What?"

"Forget I bloody well said anything. Can you help me get back to my dimension, or at least restore the rest of my family's memories, preferably my mother and father's?"

"What about Robin?"

"Worked for him, for my dad, it didn't," I explained. "Sometimes, when you're starting out, you have to really mean it when you cast spells."

"But, I'm not starting out. I've had these powers since before I was born. I started fightin' when I was thirteen, for God's sake, I grew up with one of the most powerful dark mages in the world for a second father while another pair of talented sorcerers were my birth parents. I'm not startin' out."

"I'm- I'm sorry, did you say second dad?"

"Yeah, got a problem with that, Tarazi?"

"No, I'm just saying, you made it seem like your parents were still together, but there was another man in the equation."

"Look, it was a three-way relationship with them. They all raised me. Mum an' Uncle Nick were the usual parents, an' Dad, well... let's just not talk about him. Then once I hit seven an' almost died, Dad got pulled onto the Waverider, an' I spent the rest of my childhood on a time-traveling spaceship with only seein' my brother every... two-three months or so. So, do you have a problem with that, eh?"

"No, I'm just saying, it's not the most normal way of being raised..."

"Neither is bein' born into not one but two very powerful billionaire families, but 'ere we are, Love. Can we just get back home? I'm missin' the William that doesn't give me a glare everytime I see him."

"Oh, you know him?"

"Know's an understatement, Ally. They've ben dating since they were... twelve?"

"Yeah, sounds bout right."

Ally pretended to throw up in her hands. "That's disgusting."

"Oh, really?"

"Yeah, really."

"I- alright, this is getting way off-track. Can you restore their memories or not?" I asked. "I can't. Only you can. How did you restore your brother's memories?"

"Same way I tried to restore my dad's. Rebmemer," I tried to insist. "Not the same way. When you restored your brother's memories, you were more emotional, weren't you?"

"I- I thought that people would think I was crazy. I didn't want to be alone... I- yes, I was more emotional."

"There it is."

"So, you're tellin' me I have to use the methods I used when I was six now? I'm seventeen, I've used my powers on the regular since I was seven."

"Are we done here? Because, I need to get an education so I can get a degree in social marketing."

"Uh, I'm sorry, what? Dumbest degree possible."

"At least I plan on going to college and doing something with my life."

"Okay, you are actin' way too much like that slag."

"Oh, and what are you doing?"

No way she ends up like this.

Not if I have anything to say about it. "I'm gettin' your memories back, Love. Rebmemer ruoy efil!" I yelled, the wind picking up in the room.

Once it calmed down, I looked into her eyes, and I saw the same little girl I love. "Mommy, Daddy?"

"See?! I'm not off my bloody rocker!"

"How do you know backward magic?" Mum questioned. "For God's- I'M YOUR BLOODY DAUGHTER!"

"No way any kid of mine that I raise is acting like this."

"Well, you didn't actually start parenting me until I hit eleven, because you and Dad, or John, as you know him, were with Nick Necro until I was seven, after I almost died for the second time, the two of you left, and then Dad left to go around the world to go exorcise demons out of lil' kids, then he found himself on the Waverider an' fightin' throughout time."

"Why in the world would I let a kid go with John aboard some time-traveling spaceship or whatever?"

"Oh, I almost set the house on fire an' almost killed someone at school. You sent me over to the Waverider because you wanted to straighten me out, wrong bloody choice, bein' around them basically jus' made things worse."

"I'm- I'm sorry, did you say that you set the house on fire?"

"Yep. You were so pissed."

"I can imagine."

"Bri, why- why do you look like that?"

"Hon, I am not sure whatsoever. But, please tell them, I'm not insane, they're your parents, we're your siblings."

"Yeah, the trainwreck and the only normal magician out of all of us are my siblings."

"Gee, thanks."

"I'm not wrong, am I?" She asked. I rolled my eyes. "Whatever. I don't think... I don't know how we're going to get Mum and Dad's memories back."

"If all three of you are our," Mum made a slight barfing motion and shuddered. 

Guess she isn't that into him after all.

"Kids, then why does one of you have a British accent and the other two don't?"

"I have a bloody Brit accent because as I have so-clearly stated already, I spent four years of my life with my father only and primarily lived in England an' stayed around Brits while you stayed in... Gotham an' Shadowcrest with little Robin, an' well, Ally wasn't born until after you two actually started to become actual parents, actually start to act like you were a married couple, despite bein' married for... nine-ten years before that."

"Oh, hell, no. You're telling me that I'm married to this... this bastardly jerk for ten plus years, have three children, and- and-"

"Honestly, when I went to the past on accident after a mishap fired off last year, I thought the same thing. But, here we are. Now, do we have any idea how we can get my mother's memory back?"

"Look, you already restored two people's memories. You have to... just have to repeat what you did."

"Tried that already."

"Try when you're more pissed off, maybe?"

Robin chuckled. "That won't be hard."

I shot a glare at him. "Shut up."

"See?"

"I am going to suckerpunch you into another dimension one of these days."

The bell rang. "Wonderful. Let's go."

"Passing period. Zatanna, John, please go to your classes per usual. Robin, Allison, if you remember them, then go to your classes. If you don't, then here is a new one." He handed the three of us a sheet of paper each. "On the back is a map of the school. If you have anything you need, talk with me."

I thanked him, then walked to where my... second period.. is.

"I can't bloody believe I still have to go to class when the world might as well be burning up in flames."

"Your hair... it's so weird seeing you with long hair, with blonde hair in general, I can't remember the last time you kept blonde, let alone dyed it lavender."

"Trust me, I did not pick this outfit. Where the bloody hell are the fishnets, the dark tones? Pink crop top an' a white skirt, what the bloody hell is goin' on with that? I'm jus' I'm jus' bloody wonderin' why this outfit don't have... well, anythin'. Especially with the fucking blonde hair. Like, what? Give me back my split-dyed black-blue hair, holy shite." (And yes, I will make a very valid and very consistent point to mention her hair color in very, very specific detail)

"Honestly."

Then someone shoved me. "Son of a cock-sucking slag!" I cursed under my breath, getting back up instantly and facing the bastard who shoved me, flipping my hair back with a whole lot of anger in my eyes. "Oh. Bloody fucking Mara. You have a death wish," I snarled, recognizing the girl as Damian's younger sister.

"Hey, hey, hey, calm down, sis..."

"Actually, this is good. Where's Mum an' Dad?"

"Slut."

"Excuse me, if anyone's the bloody slag 'ere, it's gonna be you, bloody minger. How many boys you sleep with?" I questioned before finding Dad and Mum. "Hey."

"What's going on here?" Mum asked. "Oh, it's jus' that this bloody fucking prat here decided to shove me and then proceed to call me a slag, or the American equivalent, anyway. Do I have permission to beat her arse?"

"What? No!"

"Actually, this is good. C'mon, throw a punch at me, I dare ya."

"What?"

"I have t' get emotional or what bloody ever to get my magic to work properly, right?"

"Yes, but-"

"Then we've got a plan. C'mon, Mara, throw one at me, see what bloody happens."

"Piece of shit, I'm gonna kill you!"

"I'd like t' see you try," I told her with a cock of my head. "Damn, she is definitely my kid."

"Yeah, I get that a lot. Alright, bitch, let's go."

"Won't take much to piss her off, just a small tap's gonna be enough, then we can all go home," Robin advised. "Oi, shut it, I haven't gotten into a fight in a hot second, I need this."

"Uh huh. Sure."

She punched me in the fucking face. "Awe, yeah, that's it, Love, keep it comin'," I said with a smirk.

I need to get pissed if I want to get us back home.

From there, we went into a full-blown fight.

Blows at each other, hell, I yanked on her hair at one point, just for show.

She hit me in the tit.

"Motherfucker!"

"This is what you wanted, isn't it?"

"Bet your arse it is! Been waitin' for this for a long time!"

"Should I help her?" Mum asked. "Nah. Let her blow off some steam, this oughta be good for 'er if she's anythin' like me."

He's right.

This will be good for me.

"Alright, thanks for the fight, Love, but, I've gotta go." I told her after a few minutes of going back and forth. "TROPELET!"

Next thing I knew, we were back in Shadowcrest, thank God.

"Dad? Mum?" I called out.

No answer.

No...

"MUM! DAD!"

"Relax, Bri, the place is giant. They could be anywhere in this magical house."

"Goddammit! Split up, find our parents!"

"That's not- look, both of us have lived in this house for years now, and we still get lost! We should stay here, stay put, they'll come to us."

"Kids! Oh, my God! Thank God!" I heard yelled not a second later. "What was that?"

"What happened?"

"You- I- I never should've let you go out there. We could've lost you... all of you... oh, my God, come here..."

Mum gave us a hug, then a portal opened. Two, actually.

Then my parents came out of one portal, and my parents and Granddad hopped out of another one, the one with just my parents being much more chaotic. "Motherfucker!" The twenty-year-old Mum yelled.

"Bloody hell!"

"John, where the hell is this, and why does this look like Shadowcrest?" The high-school version of Mum asked.

"Oh, you've gotta be bloody kiddin' me."

Chapter Text

"Hey, freak, where's your parents?" One of the usual bullies, Peter, asked, pushing me right outside the gates to my school.

"Piss off, God's sake, you wanker," I countered, picking up my stuff and tucking the piece of short blonde hair behind my ear. He laughed. "What'd you just call me, freak?"

"Called ya a wanker. Now, piss off."

"Where's your parents?"

"Workin'," I answered simply.

Mum told me to not say what they do. Last time I told someone that my parents were fightin' evil, it didn't end well, the bastard actually called the principal an' tried to claim I was "insane". Then once the principal saw me, she jus' let me go without any warning.

"Where, at a strip club?"

"For your information, they're probably savin' the world."

"Sure, they are. Whatever that milf wants to tell ya." 

"Don't you dare call my mum that. The work that she, Dad, an' my Uncle Nick do is important."

"Oh, what, you live with your uncle? All three of you? How your family pay him back, your mom fuck him?"

"Yeah, she does, actually. My dad, too."

"What a freak. Oh, and did I mention that dumb accent of yours? Mum? Mum!! Mummy!" He said in a horrible accent impression with a stupid laugh at the end. "You're born in the Americas, not damn Britain. You gonna talk like one, go back to your country, then, Constantine-Zatara. Dumb last name, too."

Dammit. Forgot I wasn't supposed to say anythin' about that.

"Excuse you, I wasn't done. An' for your information, yes, I was born here, but my biological dad was born an' raised in Liverpool across the pond, an' well, you don't wanna piss him off."

"By all means, do go ahead, freak. I'd like to see what a six-year-old can do against me."

Either I:

a: curse his ass so he doesn't bother me again
or
b: use some of that language I picked up from Dad

Mum told me to not risk public magic.

Looks like I'm doin' things the god ol' fashioned way.

"Alright, you asked for it. Like I was sayin', what my parents do is very important, way more than whatever crap your parents do, I mean, look at what you're wearin', for God's sake! Who bloody dressed you?! How much those raggedy ass jeans cost, two bucks?" I chuckled. "Who am I kiddin', ya probably found those in the dumpster right next t- nah, where you live."

That shut him up.

"Yeah, that's what I thought. Oh, an' speakin' of, where is your mum, shaggin' some bloke off the streets for money, eh? Your dad went t' go get some milk an' never came back when ya were a baby? My mum might shag my uncle, who isn't my family, by the way, but at least she don't do that for a job. We're not perfect, but, we're happy, an' I wouldn't have it any other way."

I paused for a second, thinking about my brother before realizing that I couldn't show any pause.

"She makes kids happy for a livin'. An' no, my family life might not be picture-perfect, but at least it's better than your shit life, innit, Peter? That's why you keep comin' after me, huh?" I asked with a smirk that I'm sure looks a little bit like Dad's. "Oh, an' I forgot t' mention. I might have a "weird" name, but, at least it ain't a bloody generic ass name like yours. Peter Smith, what the bloody hell type of name is that, were your parents tryin' t' get ya made fun of?"

"'Ey, Bri!" Dad called, holding hands with Uncle Nick an' Mum.

Seeing them like this, happy, sweet, not in a place they would probably be killed in, not shagging or anythin', just happy an' like a normal couple... well, threesome, it's just perfect.

"Comin'!" I called. "Alright, that should teach ya to leave me alone, yeah? I might have t' get physical next time, so don't test me, Smith. Now, if you'll excuse me, I got a mum an' not one, but two dads to go back t'. Any other questions? No? Alright. Don't come after me, an' I won't have t' get physical. Next time, before ya tell me to get lost an' back t' my country, look in the mirror before comin' after me."

Then I skipped over to my parents. "Hiya Mum, Dad, Uncle Nick."

"Heya, darlin'. How was sc-" Dad started before Mum cut her off. "What was that?"

"Mum, he was callin' me a freak. Called you a milf. An' yes, I know what that is, people have called you that too many times. What was I s'possed t' do? Not my fault he doesn't know how t' clap back. He encouraged me t' continue!" I defended. "Still doesn't give you a right to- where did you even learn those... colorful words?" Mum asked. All I did was point to Dad. "You do know that I can hear when you all are yelling at each other, correct? Not to mention that Dad just doesn't care if I'm in the room or not when he's cussing people out over the phone."

Mum sighed. "Whatever shall I do with you?" She asked Dad, running a finger across his chin as his breath hitched. "Your choice, Love," he responded after regaining his composure with a smirk. "And what about you, Sabrina?"

"Raise her, maybe?" Uncle Nick asked. "Something along those lines, Nick." She kissed him, and then held my hand, once we were far enough, she teleported all of us inside to Uncle Nick's  apartment. "Welcome home. Got anything to work on, Bri?"

"No, not really," I lied. "You sure?" 

"Yes."

"Really? Your teacher said that you aren't doing the best."

"Well, she can go fuck herself an' drown in Hell! I only missed one point!"

"Sabrina!" Mum scolded as Uncle Nick and Dad started laughing, and I mean, full out laughing. She shot a glare at both of them, and then they stopped, immediately. "John. Nick."

"Sorry, Love." Dad turned to me. "Bri, most of the stuff that comes out of my mouth or your uncle Nick's mouth, do not repeat it, got it?"

"Got it."

"Alright, go do your homework, I'm sure you have some."

"Fine," I droned out, summoning my homework because I forgot to grab mine from the classroom. "There you go. Now, have fun. Your Uncle Nick, your dad, and I will be talking in the other room, just shout if you need us, alright?"

"Sheesh, jus' say you're gonna shag, don't need to hide it from me," I muttered, opening my math book.

"Oh- alright." Uncle Nick carried her to the other room bridal-style, and I just rolled my eyes.

Most kids would be like:

Ewww my parents are going to do the dirty!!!

Please.

I've woken up from a nightmare and went to go ask for a hug or something, neglected to knock, and walked in on Dad being hung up like he was being damn crucified while Mum rode him an' Uncle Nick was inside Mum from the behind.

Let's jus' say that I was jus' fine after that, I could fall asleep on my own just fine.

God, I hate this.

Oh, and I can hear pretty much everything that's going on in the other room.

Guess Mum didn't cast a soundproof spell this time.

Hour or two later, and they finally came out.

"Hey, Bri, Mommy needs to go to Uncle Bruce's house, okay?"

"Okay, Mum."

"John, Nick has to go do something. Take her to see Chas. She should know that there's mages in the world that aren't jerks like you two, know that you can be powerful without being a dark magician."

He nodded his head.

We're going to see Grandpa!

Thank God. I haven't seen him or Robin for at least a few months.

"Alright. I love you. All three of you." She kissed both of them, one after the other, and then me on my forehead. "Ti voglio bene."

She teleported away, and Dad turned to Uncle Nick. "Goin' t' see my ol' friend, and would like t' not get into trouble, maybe."

"Meaning, you want me to stay home."

"Yes."

"Great. Have fun."

"It's gonna be borin' tryin' t' stay away from trouble, but, I'll try." They shared a brief kiss, and then we teleported over to Shadowcrest.

"Dad, I do have a question, though," I mentioned as we stood on the steps of the mansion.

"What is it, Love?"

"Why do you and Mum have to keep Robin a secret from Uncle Nick?"

"Your uncle... he... we should've kept you with your grandfather as well. He's done some... things that your mum an' I would rather try an' keep Robin away from."

"But, Uncle Nick... he's so..."

"You don't see everythin'. You ever notice 'im a little... disconnected when we come back from doing work?"

"Yeah, but..."

"It's just for safety. If Nick calms down, if he relaxes a little bit, I'll bring your brother into our lives, and we won't have t' keep him a secret. How bout that, Brina?"

I nodded my head, and then Dad knocked on the door, opening to Grandpa and Robin standing there. Dad closed the door behind him, and I ran to my brother and Grandpa. "Il avo! Robin!"

"Sabrina!" Robin greeted back, giving me a hug. "Hello, Sabrina."

"Hi, Grandpa!" I gave him a hug as well. "Constantine," he greeted, seeing past me.

"Zatara."

"I trust that you weren't followed on your way here?" He asked with a raised eyebrow. "Course not. What you think I am, a git?"

"Seeing as even though you have seen that that household is not safe for a child, let alone a magical one, multiple times, but still choose to stay there, yes, actually."

"Jus' because Nicky's not the best kid person doesn't mean he's not the best mage or boyfriend," Dad defended. "Might I remind you that I, once again, absolutely do not approve of this... lifestyle of yours?"

"Look, it works for us."

"The amount of times that you and my daughter have shown up on my doorstep a touch from death would argue," he countered. "Dad? Is this... have you an' Mum almost died before?"

"Three times each."

"Look, not- not in front of Bri, or Robin, for that matter, alright? I... I kept this a secret from Bri, kept Robin a secret from Nick for a reason. She doesn't need to know that she almost became an orphan on six different times, well, closer than we usually are t' death. She- Nick is a totally different person round 'er, almost normal, if you can believe it."

"All the more terrifying."

"If you don't mind, I would like to keep the grizzly details of Zee an' my relationship with Niick away from Brina, so, if you would be so kind as t' send my kids into another room, we could definitely talk about my near-death experiences an' fight with ya about why your daughter an' I stay with our boyfriend."

"Gladly. Nipote, why don't you show your sister your room?"

"Okay. Bri, follow me." He held onto my wrist and lead me to some other room in the giant mansion. "How do you... how do you not get lost while in here? This place... it's giant."

"I know. I sometimes get lost, too. You live in Necro's apartment, right?"

I laughed. "If you can even call it that. One living room, half a kitchen, one room for me, one room for all three of them."

"Sheesh. Now, I'm glad that Mom and Dad kept me away from Nick."

"Gee, thanks."

"I didn't mean it like that," he insisted.

I laughed. "Sure, you didn't."

A few seconds of silence passed, as I just looked around his room, amazed as to how much magic was inside there. "So, they teach you any new spells?"

I smirked. "Only a fraction of the shite that I know they actually taught me. Rest of the spells I either taught myself by sneaking into the library that's inside the living room that's supposed to be locked an' pokin' about the dark magic books."

"That's not... Bri, who knows what you could find in there."

"Oh, I know, mate. I already found a spell for necromancy, summon a demon, make people die on the spot, make people fall asleep forever, an' a lot more. It's useful when you've got arseholes up your arse every five minutes for bein' a freak. You're lucky."

"Doubtful. Il avo doesn't teach me much magic, says he'll teach me when I'm older. Mostly just spells to defend myself and heal myself and others."

"Show me what you've got."

He grabbed some sharp object and cut his forearm rather roughly, wincing in pain as he did so. "Hey, you didn't have t-"

"Laeh," he muttered, healing the injury instantly. "Now, the injury part isn't my favorite, but, at least I can-"

The wound reopened.

"Ah!"

"Rob, c'mere..." I waved a hand over his arm, muttering some incantations in Latin as I did so, the wound being surrounded by a little bit of magic before closing it seamlessly. "Thank- thank you, Bri. Also... your accent, I-"

"Sounds strange, go back t' your country, I know. Another point of teasin' for jealous arseholes."

"No, I was going to say that it sounds... interesting. I wish I could switch with you, be with Mom and Dad, ideally, with you, too."

I laughed, running a hand through my hair. "No, you don't. Bein' left at school while your parents go an' fight the evils of the world, not knowin' if you're gonna become an orphan or not every time they go out to work, no, no, you don't bloody want t' switch with me. The teasin' alone would pull you into insanity, let alone the problems that come with havin' John bloody Constantine for a father an' Zatanna Zatara for a mother, in addition, there is another dark mage in the equation for sex for my parents-"

"Right. Il avo has said some... not as generous things about him, about you, our parents."

"Yeah, he's jus' pissed cos he doesn't have anyone to get laid, so, he goes after us."

"I think it's a little deeper than that. Also, where did you even learn-"

"I have John Constantine for a father, what do you think?"

"Yeah, Il avo mostly refers to him by Constantine or some things that I would rather not repeat," he revealed. "So, somethin' along the lines of bastard, arsehole, prat, somethin' like that?" I asked. "Yeah, basically."

"So, how have you been?" I asked after another second. "I'm doing just fine, great, actually. Il avo has been homeschooling me in the little magic he will teach me, and I have been going to Gotham Academy for education," he responded with a lot more enthusiasm than I expected. "Oh, that's amazin', Rob..."

His life is damn near perfect.

An' what the bloody hell's mine?

"You are a drunk off of the streets of Liverpool! My daughter shouldn't be within forty feet of you, let alone married to you! And don't even get me started on how horrible your parenting methods must be!"

"And that's my cue that I've gotta go. It was nice seeing you again, brother. I'm sorry we can't do this more often." I gave him a hug, and then the door opened. "Bri, Love, time t' go."

"I love you, Robin. Haven't said it t' ya the last few times, but, I really do."

"I love you too, sis."

Chapter Text

"Uncle Nick, what are you- what are you doing?!"

"Relax, kid, it won't hurt," he told me before slicing my arm. "Uncle Nick, this- this hurts... where are my parents?"

"Your mom's at work and your dad's conning some poor sod. It's just you and me right now, kid."

"I don't- I don't want it to be, please, just let me out," I pleaded.

Something's off.

"Shut up!" He roared, and I whimpered. "I'm sorry..."

"You should be, you little shit." He spat, raising a knife and chopping off a little bit of my hair, sprinkling it around the ground and creating a rune on the floor. "Uncle Nick, what- what're you doing..?" I asked.

"Shut up!"

He threw me to the ground, undid the top half of my shirt, and started carving a rune into my chest as I screamed. "Stop! Please!"

"Shut up, bitch. I might put up with you for your parents, but, we're alone now."

"What did- what did I do?!" I almost screamed. "Nothing. Absolutely nothing. Your parents know that a child is the most powerful vessel for magic, and we have one, they have another one, but yet, they insist to leave you out of everything."

"Leave me out of this!" I spat. "SHUT UP!" He roared. "I'm so- so close to getting the Books of Magic, we're almost- almost there!"

"Get off of me, bloody fuckin' creep!"

I shoved him off as best I could, but he was stronger than me. "Teg ffo!!" I yelled.

"Silly girl, that doesn't wo—"

"Tel em gnikcuf og!!" I yelled.

This time, it worked.

He flew across the room, and my vision started to blur together.

Something on my chest started to burn. "Bitch, you're gonna pay for that," he snarled.

The door was kicked down, and Mum and Dad ran in. "Brina! Oh, my- what happen—" Then she saw Uncle Nick. "Nick, you fucking monster! Don't you dare touch my child ever fucking again," Mum spat. "Niarster!"

"Bri, you're gonna- you're gonna be okay, everything's gonna be okay. John, deal with him. I'll help our daughter," she said, picking me up and clutching me to her chest.

"Mumma, he- my- my chest, it- it hurts..."

"It's gonna be alright. You're going to be alright, Love," she responded. "You're gonna be alright. It's- it's alright, you're gonna be okay," she promised, clutching me tighter to her chest.

"I'm gonna be... be..." I trailed off, everything turning to black.

I woke up to so many voices yelling. "I have told you so many times that he was not a good man, that he would hurt you, your daughter, everyone around you! For God's sake, I would prefer you to stay with Constantine rather than him, and you know how much I hate Constantine! He's- Hell, he's not even here! His daughter has been in a coma for two weeks, and he's not even fucking here! I told you! Who knows if she will ever wake up again?!" I heard.

"Daddy, I know you fucking hate him, I know you do! You don't need to- for fuck's sake, he's making sure that Nick won't find and kill us!"

"You wouldn't have this fucking problem if you two wouldn't have been his damn partners, and I repeat, partners in the first place!"

"So now you're judging my love life? Blaming it on me? You trained him. You had every damn fucking chance to change him," Mum shot back. "Mum, where's- where's Dad?" I asked.

"Bri! Oh, thank God... thank- thank God, you're alright," se cried out, giving me a hug. "What- how long have I been gone?"

"It's been almost two weeks," Il avo said. "Where's Dad?"

"Presen' an' accounted for, Love," I heard. I turned and saw Dad. "Oh, my gosh, what happened to you. John?! You look like a mess!"

"Goblin's 'eart is hard to find, let's jus' say that, Love. Nick's not findin' us ever again."

Dad turned to me. "You're awake."

"Hey, Dad," I said. "Bri."

He walked out of the room. "Mum, what's-"

"I'm- I'm sorry, Sabrina. Your- this has been... so- so hard on your dad. You being gone for almost two weeks, the magic withdrawal, if you would just excuse me for a second, I'll go talk to- to him, I'll- I'll get your brother," she apologized. "Mum, what did Uncle Nick do? I- I almost died, and that's all I remember. What happened?" I asked before she walked out of the door.

"Something unspeakable," she responded before Robin came in, practically running to my side. "Caposala!"

I smiled. "Hey, Robin..."

"I've been so worried about you! How are you feeling?"

"I'm doing fine. How- how long has Dad been like this?"

"Ever since you came here."

It was another few seconds before Mum came back in.

"Sabrina, Robin, come. Dad, I'll see you later."

"What? Mum-"

"Please, I already have to deal with your father. It took me over three days to get the rune that the dick cast on you gone, I don't have the energy to deal with your attitude right now, please."

"Can't we just stay here with Grandfather?"

"We need to talk with your father about that. Come on."

We walked outside. "John, we need to figure out what we're going to do for a living."

"Really? Because, how I see it, we've got two magical houses at our bloody well disposal, an' I don't see why we can't jus' use one of those."

"Mia and William did say I was al-"

"No," she cut me off before I could go any further.

"Why not? Mia's my best friend, an-"

"No. I refuse to leave my daughter in the house as Oliver Queen."

"What- what'd he do to you?"

"I'll tell you when you're older."

"Job from Anne I need to take. Said it was some bird over in California. Call me when you find somethin', alright?"

"John, our daughter just came out from a magically-induced coma that she was stuck in for the last two weeks, I think helping someone else can wait."

"Sorry, Zee. I love you." He kissed her and then me on the head and gave Robin a hug. "I'm sorry, this can't wait."

He teleported away.

"God f-... goddammit, John! Would it kill you to be tied to real life for a damn second?!"

"Mum, calm down."

"Yeah, yeah, sorry. Come on. I can get a room at a hotel for the night, that should be enough."

Dad didn't come back until the end of the day, when I was almost sleep, half-burned off and smelling like alcohol and magic. "John, where have you been?!"

"Helpin' some bird named Meera. Followin' up tomorrow."

"John."

"What?!"

"Our daughter has literally just come out of a coma for two weeks, and this is the first time we're going to be trying to raise two kids at the same time. I frankly don't give a shit about if you're having magic withdrawals, get your shit together. And no, I actually don't care if I'm cussing in front of our kids, thanks to you, we stayed around Nick long enough for at least Brina to learn those types of word, also no thanks to you."

"Oh, my fault, eh?"

"Freakin' course it's your fault. I wanted to get the hell out of there the first time you almost died, not to mention when he almost killed Sabrina not once, not twice, now three times. You were the one who always made the argument of "we stay because of magical information and power". Well, no stupid magical power or information would be worth losing my children, how about that?"

"Is this normal?" Robin asked. "Yeah, right about. Jus' don't get in their way, an' watch out for flyin' stuff."

"Is that-"

"If you say healthy, I'm gonna smack you in the face. I grow up with two mages for parents, I think healthy is beyond us," I told him, looking at my hair in my reflection. "To be bloody fair, Zee, you made that same exact argument at least twice."

"I did not, you vain ass!"

"And where did you say that our kid learned some good ol' cuss words, again?"

"Shut up."

"Jus' sayin' the t-"

"Get out."

"What?"

"You heard me, Constantine, get the hell out of my sight and away from my kids. Come back when you've got a sense, yeah?"

"So what is this, some bloody divorce?"

"I don't even know why I said yes in the first place."

"I don't know why I even proposed, period. Your dad drove me t' do that, ya know that?"

"And you're still in my eyesight?"

"Yeah, yeah, sod the bloody fuck off, Zatanna. Never bloody should've married ya, let alone had two bloody kids with you, what the fuck was I thinking? Must've been drunk and high off of magic and drugs out of my mind."

"Most of the time, you were, yeah."

"You know, we could've done this job faster if you helped me out."

"And left our kids alone?"

"Can you—"

"What, forget about us? Excuse you, I'm literally your offspring, I hope you don't forget about me. Honestly, Mum, jus' kick him out already," I cut him off, fixing my hair. "You two need to sleep. John, two choices here: take it outside and work this out, or you get the hell out of my sight."

"First one, please."

"Alright, let's go."

They closed the door behind them.

"Twenty minutes, they'll be shaggin'. Ignore them."

We didn't start going to school until the following week.

And no luck here, either.

Got picked on for everything possible.

"Oh, you dye your hair? Freak. Who dyes their hair at seven?"

"You wish. Slag, this is natural. And, I'm six for your information."

When we got home, Robin told me something. "I wish I had the same confidence you did, you know that?"

I laughed in response. "No you bloody don't. Confidence means more bastards comin' for ya, an' I doubt you can 'andle it."

"John, can you not smoke in the damn room?! If you light that damn thing, I'm setting you on fire, see how you like it," Mum threatens as we walk into our makeshift home, a motel room that Robin's still getting used to. "I don't know how you lived in a space like this for as long as you did..."

"It's an acquired livin' space, mate."

The few times that Dad's at the motel room, he's there for Mum and Mum only. "I'm sorry this is the impression you get of Dad. He's not always like this, he's nice, I swear. He's just... he just takes a little getting used to is all."

One day, we walked in after school and Dad wasn't there. "Where's Dad?"

"He is spending some time away from us, helping others. Your Aunt Sara required someone with experience in working with demons."

"Are you—"

"Look, it was hard enough these past few weeks. He's helping to save the world, for God's sake."

"Fine."

"What he's helping to prevent, that could be saving our world and possibly all of time. So, please, just don't, alright?"

"When can I see him?"

"I don't know."

"For fuck's sake, why couldn't we just stay together?!"

"Sabrina, please. You should know better than anyone that our family isn't normal, just..."

I stormed away and into my own room of sorts. "God fucking dammit!!"

Next month at school, some slag decided to pick a fight. "Oh, where's your parents, freak?"

"Shut up."

"Deflecting a confrontation? What a coward would say."

"Don't. Stop—"

"Your mom's Zatanna, right? The slut? What she do for a living, fuck guys?"

"Shut. Up."

"What, parents a sensitive subject for you? Your dad walk out?"

"FUCKING IT! I'VE FUCKING HAD IT!" I yelled, losing my damn temper and starting up a spell that I had to struggle to find in the first place when I was pissed off an' a little drunk after swiping a bit off of Dad's drink.

"animam hanc crucias donec paene mortui sunt!" I yelled. "What are you doing, freak?"

"Getting payback," I said in a deep voice, her very soul being ripped out.

"POTS!" I heard when the spell was almost completed. "SABRINA! STOP!"

"What?!"

"Do you know how dangerous what you just did is?! You could have alerted Nick to where we are! Where did you even—"

"You three really didn't watch over me," I cut her off. "Okay, home. Now."

Pretty much dragged me by my hair back home. "Young lady, where did you even get that spell?!"

"I know Latin, you didn't have the spellbooks on lock, someone pissed me off, I'm already pissed off, thank you for that, by the way, so, I'm sorry if I had enough of some bitch callin' you a slut."

"Even so, you, what you did is unacceptable. That was a signature spell that Nick created, and—"

"And you stopped me anyway, correct?" 

"If I didn't, if I wasn't so fucking paranoid, you would've risked everything, being caught, everything. You know- you know what, fuck it, you're going with your dad."

"Screw this place! Screw- fuck you!" I yelled, something happening with my hands. "Bri, calm- calm down."

"Now you're te-"

"Look around, Bri!" Mum cut me off. I did, and everything was catching on fire. "I'm- I'm sorry..."

The next morning, there was a whole-ass spaceship outside the motel.

"This," I motioned to the spaceship. "Is where I'm gonna live?"

"For the moment."

"School?"

"They have a professor on board."

"Great. Bye, Mum. I love you. Robin, you... you too."

"Bye, Bri." Both of them gave me a hug, then I walked to the spaceship.

"Hey, Love."

"Dad!" I practically ran to him.

"Welcome aboard the Waverider, kid. You're gonna fit right in."