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Part 1 of A lesson in parenting
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2021-10-08
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2025-04-22
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A lesson in parenting book 1: the lightning thief

Chapter 5: Break and Chapter 4: My mother teaches me bullfighting

Notes:

All text in bold belongs to uncle Rick and I have the British books.

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

The new arrivals turned towards each other, a little confused, before introducing themselves to each other. 

"Love?" Lester asked, looking over towards them.

"Polly!" The taller one smiled, running over to him, pulling him close. 

"Dad?" Magnus asked, unsure.

"Magnus, my boy." Frey smiled, pulling away from Lester to give them a hug. 

Upon realizing everyone was looking at something behind them, Nico turned back and smiled. "Seph?" They asked, unsure if she recognized or liked them. 

"Nico, darling." She smiled, opening up her arms to them. They climbed over the couch to hug her. 

"My dove." Hades smiled, also walking over to her. 

"Wait? When are they from?" Piper asked.

"I guessing the same time as us, as Lester seems to be in a relationship with someone that Apollo isn't." Annabeth suggested.

"That makes sense, I guess." 

"I'm going to investigate the doorway." Alex decided, walking towards it, quickly followed by Leo. "There's food in here." He announced, sticking his head back out. 

All the mortals quickly walked into the room where there was a buffet table and some long tables so they could all sit together. 

"Annabeth. You said you'd tell me who's string I saw the fates cut." Percy walked over to them, wrapping an arm around her. 

"Yeah, I want to know too." Grover walked over to them, along with a few other people. 

"All right. Rey, Sam, Leo, Meg, I'm not going to tell you because it's spoilers for you." They walked away, despondent.

"The hero of the first great prophecy. Who we all thought was Percy." 

"Ah! That makes sense." Nico decided, before walking over to the buffet table, where almost everyone else was.

A few minutes later, the group had separated out into small groups. Reyna, Leo and Alex were having a conversation in Spanish; Sam was intrigued by the Greeks so had gone over to Annabeth, where they were joined by Magnus and Piper; Blitz, Hearth, Hazel and Frank were having a conversation about magic; Clarisse, Hedge, TJ and Halfborn were sat together, discussing the merits of different weapons; Sally, Grover,  Rachel, Thalia and Meg were having a conversation about nature, which Magnus joined after having caught up with his cousin, along with Nico and Will.

After they had all eaten, and moved around a bit, they returned to the main room to continue reading, in approximately the same arrangement as before. 

"Alright. Are we ready to continue?" Piper asked. 

"Wait, we don't know who most of you are." Frey asked, from his seat between Lester and Magnus. 

Everyone reintroduced themselves, going around the circle, starting with Zeus (obviously). 

"Zeus, leader of the Greek gods and God of the sky."

"Poseidon. God of the sea, and unfortunately his brother."

"Annabeth Chase. She/they, child of Athena, and yes, Magnus is my cousin."

"Percy Jackson.  I'm genderfluid and currently using he/they pronouns, child of Poseidon."

"Leo Valdez, he/they, child of Hephaestus." Leo was once again sat on Percy's lap.

"Sally Jackson. She/her, mortal who can see through the mist and mother of Percy Jackson."

"What's the mist?" Frey asked.

"The Greek version of the Glamour." Magnus answered him, having asked the same question previously.

"Grover. He/him. Satyr."

"Calypso. She/her Sorceress and former immortal."

They then moved onto the next couch round.

"Hermes. God of travellers and thieves and son of Zeus."

"Sam al-Abbas, she/her, Valkyrie and daughter of Loki." She scowled at this.

"Alex Fierro, genderfluid, he/him currently, also a child of Loki, unfortunately."

"Magnus Chase, he/they, child of Frey."

"Frey. Norse god of summer and Fertility."

"Lester. Mortal form of Apollo."

"Apollo. God of music, healing, poetry and the sun."

"Will Solace. He/him. I'm the camp medic and son of Apollo."

"Rachel Dare, she/her. Mortal and Oracle of Delphi. I basically the vessel for the Oracle to tell prophecies through sometimes." She explained, expecting Frey to ask.

"Thalia Grace, she/her, daughter of Zeus and lieutenant of the hunters of Artemis."

"Artemis, goddess of the hunt, the moon and childbirth."

"Meg McCaffrey, daughter of Demeter."

"Demeter, goddess of agriculture."

The people on the next couch had actually moved around without anyone noticing.

"Persephone. Goddess of springtime and Queen of Hell."

"Nico di Angelo. They/them. Child of Hades."

"Hades. God of the dead and Underworld, and riches."

"Hazel Levesque. She/her. Daughter of Pluto, the Roman god of the Underworld and Riches."

"Hephaestus. God of fire and the forge."

"Dionysius. God of wine and leader of camp half-blood, unfortunately."

"Hestia. Goddess of home and hearth."

"Gleeson Hedge. Satyr." Hedge grunted from the final couch.

"Clarisse La Rue, she/her. Daughter of Ares."

"Ares, God of war and bloodshed." 

"Frank Zhang. He/him. Son of Mars, Roman god of war."

"Halfborn Gunderson. He/him. Viking mortal."

"TJ. He/him. Son of Tyr, Norse god of war and challenges."

"Hearthstone. He/him Elf and rune magician." Hearth signed, with Blitz translating.

"Blitzen. He/him. Dwarf and son of Freya. Norse goddess of beauty and Fertility."

"Aphrodite. Goddess of love and beauty."

"Piper McLean. She/they Daughter of Aphrodite."

"Reyna Ramirez-Arellano. She/her. Daughter of Bellona, Roman goddess of battle strategy."

"Athena. Greek goddess of Wisdom."

"Mallory Keen. She/her. Daughter of Frigg, Norse goddess of marriage and family."

"Hera. Goddess of marriage." Hera finished from where she was sat next to her husband. 

"Ok, you may start." Frey announced.

"Alright. Chapter 4: My Mother Teaches me Bullfighting." Piper started. Percy tensed up, tightening their arms around Leo.

"I don't know if I'm in this chapter or not, but I'd like to apologize now. 12-year-old Annabeth was a bit of a bitch." Annabeth announced to lighten the mood a little.

"It's ok, Wise Girl. I forgive you." Percy decided, pulling her into a quick kiss. 

"I know. I'm still sorry."

"Babe, you ready for me to start?" Piper asked.

"Yeah, go on."

"We tore through the night along dark Country roads. Wind slammed against the Camaro.  Rain lashed the windshield. I didn't know how my mom could see anything but she kept her foot on the gas.

Every time there was a flash of lightning, I looked at Grover sitting next to me in the backseat and I wondered if I'd gone insane of if he was wearing some kind of shag-carpet trousers. But, no, the smell was one I remembered from kindergarten field trips to the petting zoo- lanolin, like from wool. The smell of a wet barnyard animal. "

"Thanks for that description, Perce."

"No problem G-man."

"All I could think to say was, 'So, you and my mom… know each other?'

Grover's eyes flitted to the rearview mirror, though there would no cars behind us.  'Not exactly,' he said. 'I mean, we've never met in person. But she knew I was watching you.'

'watching me?'

'keeping tabs on you. Making sure you were okay. But I wasn't faking being your friend ,'he added hastily. 'I am your friend.'

'Um ... what are you exactly?'

'That doesn't matter right now.'

'It doesn't matter? From the waist down, my best friend is a donkey -'"

"That was the wrong thing to say Perce." Thalia said.

"I know that now Thals." They sighed.

"Grover let out a sharp, throaty 'blaa-ha-ha!'

I'd heard him make that sound before, but I'd always assumed it was a nervous laugh. Now I realized it was more of an irritated bleat. 

'Goat!' he cried.

'What?'

'I'm a goat from the waist down.'

'You just said it didn't matter.'

'Blaa-ha-ha! There are satyrs who would trample you under hoof for such an insult!'"

"Yeah, like me." Hedge grunted.

"'Whoa. Wait. Satyrs. You mean like... Mr. Brunner's myths?'

'Where those old ladies at the fruit stand a myth, Percy? Was Mrs Dodds a myth?'

'So you admit there was a Mrs Dodds!'

'Of course.'

'Then why-'

'The less you knew, the fewer monsters you'd attract, ' Grover said like that should be perfectly obvious. 'We put Mist over the humans' eyes. We hoped you'd think the Kindly One was a hallucination. But it was no good. You started to realize who you are.'"

"Grover, who's fault is it Percy didn't believe it was a hallucination?"

"You've already told me I'm a terrible liar 10 times today, Thalia."

"Doesn't make it less true." She shrugged.

"I don't think Percy had any clue what was going on at this point." Hazel suggested.

"I didn't, but I knew something weird was happening." Percy explained.

"'Who I - wait a minute, what do you mean?'

The weird bellowing noise rose up again somewhere behind us, closer than before. Whatever was chasing us was still on our trail.

 'Percy,' my mom said, 'there's too much to explain and not enough time. We have to get you to safety. '

'Safety from what? Who's after me?'

'Oh, nobody much,' Grover said, obviously still miffed about the donkey comment. 'Just the Lord of the Dead and some of his blood-thirstiest minions. '"

"HADES!" Poseidon roared, making said god roll his eyes.

"'Grover!'

'Sorry, Mrs Jackson. Could you drive faster, please?'

I tried to wrap my mind around what was happening,  but I couldn't do it. I knew this wasn't a dream. I had no imagination."

"What are you on about Jackson? You have a crazy good imagination." Rachel informed him.

"I could never dream up something this weird.

My mom made a hard left. We swerved onto a narrower road, racing past darkened farmhouses and wooded hills and pick your own strawberries signs on white picket fences. 

'Where we going?' I asked.

'The summer camp I told you about.' My mother's voice was tight; she was trying for my sake not to be scared. 'The place your father wanted to send you.'

'The place you didn't want me to go.'

'Please, dear' my mother begged. 'This is hard enough. Try to understand. You're in danger.'

'Because some old ladies cut yarn.'

'Those weren't old ladies,' Grover said. 'Those were the Fates. Do you know what it means- the fact they appeared in front of you? They only do that when you're about to... when someone's about to die.'

'Whoa. You said "you".'

'No I didn't. I said someone".'

'You meant "you" as in me.'

'I meant you, like "someone". Not you, you.'

'Boys!' my mom said.

She pulled the wheel hard to the right, and I got a glimpse of the figure she swerved to avoid- a dark fluttering shape now lost behind us in the storm.

'What was that?' I asked.

'We're almost there,' my mother said, ignoring my question. 'Another mile. Please. Please. Please.'

I didn't know where there was, but I found myself leaning forward in the car, anticipating, wanting us to arrive."

"Your mother literally just told you where you were going, Prissy?" Clarisse pointed out.

"Look, I was kind of freaking out there." Percy sighed.

"Outside, nothing but rain and darkness- the kind of empty countryside you get way out on the tip of Long Island. I thought about Mrs Dodds and the moment when changed into the thing with pointed teeth and leathery wings. My limbs went numb from delayed shock. She really hadn't been human. She'd meant to kill me.

Then I thought about Mr. Brunner... and the sword he thrown me. Before I could ask Grover about that,  the hair rose on the back of my neck. There was a blinding flash, a jaw-rattling boom!, and our car exploded.

I remember feeling weightless, like I was being crushed, fried and hosed down all at the same time.

I peeled my forehead off the back of the driver's seat and said, 'Ow.'

'Percy!' My mom shouted.

I'm okay...'

I tried to shake off the daze. I wasn't dead. The car hadn't really exploded. We'd swerved into a ditch.  Our driver's- side doors were wedged in the mud.  Our roof had cracked open like an egg shell and rain was pouring in. Lightning. That was the only explanation."

"ZEUS!" Poseidon cried at his other brother.

"We'd been blasted right of the road. Next to me in the back seat was a big motionless lump. 'Grover!'

He was slumped over,  blood tripling from side of his mouth. I shook his furry hip, thinking, No! Even if you are half barnyard animal, you're my best friend and I don't want you to die!"

"So kind of you, Perce." Grover chuckled.

"Then he groaned, 'Food,' and I knew there was hope.

'Percy,' my mother said, 'we have to ... ' Her voice faltered.

I looked back. In a flash of lightning, through the mud-spattered rear windshield, I saw a figure lumbering towards us on the shoulder of the road. The sight of it made my skin crawl. It was a dark silhouette of a huge guy, like a football player. He seemed to be holding a blanket over his head. His top half was bulky and fuzzy. His upraised hands made it look like he had horns."

"No imagination my ass, Jackson." Rachel shook her head with a smile.

"I swallowed hard. 'Who is-'

'Percy,' my mother said, deadly serious. 'Get out of the car.'

My mother threw herself against the driver's-side door. It was jammed shut in the mud. I tried mine. Stuck too. I looked desperately at the hole in the roof. It might have been an exit, but the edges were sizzling and smoking.

'Climb out the passenger side!' my mother told me. 'Percy - you have to run. Do you see that big tree?'

'What?'"

"It's me!" Thalia thrust her arms in the air, making some people chuckle, and getting confused looks from others.

"Another flash of lightning, and through the smoking hole in the roof I saw the tree she meant: a huge, White House Christmas-tree-sized Pine at the crest of the nearest hill.

'That's the property line,' my Mom said. 'Get over that hill and you'll see a big farmhouse down in the valley. Run and don't look back. Yell for help. Don't stop until you reach the door'

'Mom, you're coming too.'

Her face was pale, her eyes as sad as when she looked at the ocean.

'No!' I shouted. 'You are coming with me. Help me carry Grover.'

'Food!' Grover moaned a little louder.

The man with the blanket on his head kept coming towards us,  making his grunting, snorting noises. As he got closer I realized he couldn't be holding a blanket over his head because his hands- huge meaty hands - were swinging at his sides. There was no blanket. Meaning the bulky, fuzzy mass that was too big to be his head... was his head. And the points that look like horns...

'He doesn't want us,' my mother told me. 'He wants you. Besides I can't cross the property line.'

'But...'

'We don't have time,  Percy. Go. Please.'

I got mad, then- mad at my mother, at Grover the goat, at the thing with horns as lumbering towards us slowly and deliberately like, like a bull.

I climbed across Grover and pushed the door open into the rain. 'We're going together. Come on, Mom.'

'I told you...'

'Mom! I am not leaving you. Help me with Grover.'

I didn't wait for her answer. I scrambled outside, dragging Grover from the car. He he was surprisingly light , but I couldn't have carried him very far if my mom hadn't come to my aid. 

Together, we draped Grover's arms over our shoulders and started stumbling uphill through wet waist-high grass.

Glancing back, I got my first clear look at the monster. He was 7 feet tall, easy, his arms and legs like something from the cover of Muscle Man magazine - bulging biceps and triceps and a bunch of other 'ceps, all stuffed like baseballs under vein-webbed skin. He wore no clothes except underwear- I mean bright white Fruit-of-the-looms, which would have been funny, except the top half of his body. Coarse brown hair started at about his belly button and got thicker as it reached his shoulders.

His neck was a mass of muscle and fur leading up to his enormous head, which had a snout as long as my arm, snotty nostrils with a gleaming brass ring, cruel black eyes and horns- enormous black-and-white horns with points you just couldn't get from electric sharpener.

I recognized the monster, all right. He had been in one the first stories Mr. Bruner told us. But he couldn't be real.

I blinked the rain out of my eyes. ' That's-'

'Pasiphae's son,' my mother said. 'I wish I had known how badly they want to kill you.'

'But he's a min-'

'Don't say his name,' she warned. 'Names have power.'"

"Ah, a lesson Percy never learnt."

"Oh, shut up Nico." Percy rolled their eyes.

"Can you tell us what he was?" Sam asked.

"I think it should say later on. But do you know about Theseus?" Percy asked, suspecting Sam knew of some of the Greek myths.

"Ah, yes. The monster he fought?" She confirmed.

"Yep." Percy nodded. 

"The pine tree was still too far- a hundred metres uphill at least. 

I glanced behind me again.

The bull-man hunched over our car, looking in the windows- or not looking, exactly. More like snuffling, nuzzling. I wasn't sure why he bothered, since we were only about 15 meters away.

'Food?' Grover moaned.

'Shhh,' I told him. 'Mom, what's he doing? Doesn't he see us?'

'His sight and hearing are terrible,' she said. 'He goes by smell. But he'll figure out where we are soon enough.'

As if on cue ,the bull-man bellowed in rage. He picked up Gabe's Camaro by the torn roof, the chassis creaking and groaning. He raised the car over his head and threw it down the road. It slammed into the wet asphalt and skidded in a shower of sparks for about half mile before coming to a stop. The gas tank exploded.

Not a scratch, I remembered Gabe saying.

Oops."

There were a lot of chuckles at this.

'"Percy,' my mom said. 'When he sees us, he'll charge. Wait until the last second, then jump out of the way- directly sideways. He he can't change direction very well once he's charging. Do you understand?"

'How do you know all this?'

'I've worried about an attack for a long time. I should have expected this. I was selfish, keeping you near me.'

'Keeping me near you? But-'

Another bellow of rage, and the bull-man started tromping uphill. 

He'd smelled us.

The pine tree was only a few more metres, but the hill was getting steeper and Grover wasn't getting any lighter.

The bull-man closed in. Another few seconds and he be on top of us.

My mother must've been exhausted but she shouldered Grover. 'Go Percy! Separate! Remember what I said. '

I didn't want to split up, but I had the feeling she was right - it was our only chance. I sprinted to the left, turned, and saw the creature bearing down on me. His black eyes glowed with hate. He reeked like rotten meat.

He lowered his head and charge, those razor-sharp horns aimed straight at my chest.

The fear in my stomach made me want to bolt, but that wouldn't work. I could never outrun this thing. So I held my ground, and at the last minute I jumped to the side.

The bull-man stormed past like a freight train, then bellowed with frustration and turned, but not towards me this time, towards my mother, who was setting Grover down in the grass.

We'd reached the crest of the hill. D own the other side I could see a valley, just as my mother had said, and the lights of a farmhouse glowing yellow through the rain. But that was half a mile away. We'd never make it."

"And that's why we now have border control." Annabeth smiled.

"No it's not?" Clarisse looked confused.

"Situations like that are why we kept border control." Annabeth replied.

"Is it true that some mortals have tried to buy strawberries from the border control?" Leo asked.

"Yes, they all have strawberries on hand now." They chuckled in reply.

"Why?" Alex asked.

"Our cover is a strawberry farm. I'm sure it'll be mentioned soon." Percy joined in the conversation.

"The bull-man grunted, pawing the ground. He kept eyeing my mother, who was now retreating slowly downhill, back towards the road, trying to lead the monster away from Grover.

'Run, Percy!' she told me. 'I can't go any further. Run!'"

Percy whispered something gently to Leo, warning them of what was about to happen, knowing it would hurt him, bringing back memories of his mother's death.

"Can you warn Alex too? Magnus is going to take it hard too, but I don't want to spoil it." Annabeth added, quietly.

Leo nodded, getting Alex's attention, before hurriedly saying something in Spanish, causing him to say "thank you" and pull Magnus close against him. 

Reyna, who had also heard, cuddled up close to Piper, knowing it may bring up memories of their father being kidnapped.

"But I just stood there, frozen in fear, as the monster charged her. She tried to sidestep, as she'd told me to do, but the monster had learned his lesson. His hand shot out and grabbed her by the neck as she tried to get away. He lifted her as she struggled, kicking and pummelling the air.

'Mom!'

She caught my eyes, managed to choke out one last word: 'Go!'

Then with an angry roar, the monster closed his fists around my mother's neck, and she dissolved before my eyes, melting until light, a shimmering golden form, as if she were a holographic projection. A blinding flash, and she was simply gone.

'No!'"

Everyone turned to face Sally, before turning away to focus on the rest of the story, to try and work out what had happened, as that's not what happens when someone is killed by monsters.

"Anger replaced my fear. Newfound strength burned in my limbs- the same rush of energy I got when Mrs Dodds grew talons.

The bull-man bore down on Grover, who lay helpless in the grass. The monster hunched over, snuffling my best friend, as if he were about to lift Grover up and make him dissolve too.

I couldn't allow that.

I stripped off my red rain jacket.

'HEY!' I screamed, waving the jacket, running to one side of monster. 'Hey, stupid. Ground beef!'

'Raaaarrrrr!' The monster turned towards me, shaking his meaty fists.

I had an idea- a stupid idea, but better than no idea at all. I put my back to the big pine tree and waved my red jacket in front of the bull-man, thinking I jump out the way at the last moment.

But it didn't happen like that.

The bull-man charged too fast, his arms out to grab me whichever way I try to dodge.

Time slowed down.

My legs tensed. I couldn't jump sideways so I leaped straight up, kicking off from the creature's head using it as a springboard, turning in midair and landing on his neck.

How did I do that? I didn't have time to figure it out. A millisecond later the monster's head slammed into the tree, and the impact nearly knocked my teeth out.

The bull-man staggered around trying to shake me.  I locked my arms around his horns to keep from being thrown. Thunder and lightning were still going strong. The rain was in my eyes. The smell of rotten meat burned my nostrils.

The monster shook himself around and bucked like a rodeo bull. He should have just backed up into the tree and smashed me flat but I was starting to realize this thing only had one gear: forward.

Meanwhile, Grover started groaning in the grass. I wanted to yell at him to shut up, but the way I was getting tossed around, if I opened my mouth I'd bite my own tongue off. 

'Food,' Grover moaned.

The bull-man wheeled towards him, pawed the ground again, and got ready to charge. I thought about how he squeezed the life out of my mother, made her disappear in a flash of light, and rage filled me like high octane fuel. I got both hands around one horn and pulled backwards with all my might. The monster tensed, gave a surprised grunt, then- snap."

"Impressive, Prissy. Always wondered how you got that." Clarisse nodded.

"The bull-man screamed and flung me through the air. I landed flat on my back in the grass. My head smacked against a rock. When I sat up,  my vision was blurry, but I had a horn in my hands, a ragged bone weapon the size of a knife.

The monster charged.

Without thinking,  I rolled to one side and came up kneeling. As the monster barreled past, I drove the broken horn straight into his side, right up under his furry ribcage. The bull-man roared in agony. He flailed, clawing at his chest, then began to disintegrate- not like my mother in a flash of golden light, but like crumbling sand, blown away in chunks by the wind, the same way Mrs Dodds had burst apart.

The monster was gone.

The rain had stopped. Yhe storm still rumbled, but only in the distance. I smelled like livestock and my knees were shaking. My head felt like it was splitting open. I was weak and scared and trembling with grief. I'd just seen my mother vanish. I wanted to lie down and cry, but there was Grover, needing my help, so I managed to haul him up and stagger down into the valley towards the lights of the farmhouse. I was crying, calling for my mother, but I held on to Grover- I wasn't going to let him go.

The last thing I remember is collapsing on a wooden porch, looking up at ceiling fan circling above me, moths flying around a yellow light and the stern faces of a familiar-looking bearded man and a pretty girl, her blonde hair curled like Cinderella's. They both looked down at me and the girl said, 'He's the one. He must be.'"

"Aaaww!" Aphrodite squealed, once again at the wrong pitch, making a few people freak out more. Piper looked around before deciding to quickly finish the chapter.

"'Silence, Annabeth,' the man said. 'He's still conscious. Bring him inside.'"

Notes:

Next chapter will start with lots of fluff and trying to calm down.