Chapter Text
Once upon a time there lived a girl who loved to sing. Her name was Y/N. (not you I swear). One day she woke up and quickly threw her hair up inti a messay bun and began her descent to the kitchen. There she found her mother standing with a gun ppinted toward a man with messay long hair. “oh my god!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Mother what are you doung!?!?!!?!!!!!!!!?????!?!?!?!?!?” Y/N screamed . “Y/N’s mother, I am so sorry I scared you but I am here to purchase your daughter, my name is harry styles, taylor swifyts ex and also memn=ber of hit boyband one direction?!!!!!!!!!!!” “woah really!!!!!” eclaimed Y/Ns moether as she lowweered her gun. “can I take herr then?” asks harry styles, taylor swifts ex and also member of his boy band ome direction. “k bye then Y/N”
In te tour bus Y/N meets the other member of the band. liM, ZAYN, NIALL, louise, all exchange greetugsn with Y/N.“top if the mornin’ to you lassy!!!!!” excitedly yells nail. “hey whats up ia am actually a ghost rip me”, lim tells her. Y/N looks around very cocnfused at her nerew life. “this is cray cray rn guys” she tells them. Harry styles tayor swyfts ex and also member of hit boy band one direftion looks directly into her blue round orbs. Then he reaches over and kisses her !!!!!!!!!!!! “I am in love with you Y/N wh ddo you think I bougjt you?????”. Y/N looks at him. She considers. She violently smacks him across the face ass she screams, “HOW DARE YOU KISSS ME WITHOUT MY CONSENT AND ALSO BUY ME WITHU TMY CONSENT!!!!! ALSO BUYING PEOPLE IS ILLEGAL !!!!!!” . harry styles, tayors wistfts. Exa nd also member of hit boyband ome direction is shocked. Zayn then looks at thm botha wakewaradel;yn, “giys can u not fight im sensitive and louise needs trigger warnijgs!!!!” louise is crying in a conrener. Nail then takes Y/N up to er bedroom. “whats the craic then eit you!” “nothung muvh tbh just been bought an dthe kissed s o allw sweel tbf” tells y/n. “up the ra nigel.” Saya mial. Y/N looks athim. “who is j=nigel’ she asks. “trust me you do- twigger warnoing yellinh- NOT want to know” despite saying this mial went on a two hour long rant sbout niagel farage and the englidh people in genral.
Lter in the day, harry styles taylor swifts exa andalso member of hit boy band one direction come to apolgise to Y/N with a guitar in hand. He begins playin g the guitar. “oh yyyyyyy/nnnnnnn I am so sorryyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy I did not mean to ofeenndddnnddnndnndndndnd youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu”. “that was a shit song bro.” Y/N blunty tells him. “you do better then!!!” yells harry styles taylor swifts ex and also member of hut boyband one direction. Y/N begins to sing, “remember when you hit the breaks too soon twenty stitches in a hostiplable roomwhen you started crying I did too!!!” “did you wrote that yourself?!” aska he. “ya” replies Y/N. “do not fecking klie to me I know my ex taylor soeft actually wrote it!!!!!”. “oh for fucks sake r u serious I thought you wouldn’t notice. Shit.” Says Y/N.
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It’s a newday. Nial comes down to see Y/N after the night befre, “do not be afraird yo r gods little cow”. He was glowing. “what are u a biblically accurate angel????”. “no just irish” he smiles.
Author’s Note: The previos author was hit by a car while writing this. They are on life support as we speak. I am the driver who was in the car. The author was holding this and writing when they got hit and before they blacked out they whipered, “This is my legacy. Continue it. Avenge me.” I, a humble chicken farmer for rural Tennessee ,will do my best to carry on their life’s work and will keep you updated on their condition in the ICU.
“What are you doing in my room?” Y/N asks. “I just wanted to make sure you were ok…” “I was ok until you broke into my room!” Y/N exclaims. “Right then,” says Niall, “I’ll see you later then.” Then he took his Guinness and flew off on a rainbow while doing a jig. The next day at breakfast Y/N did not make eye contact with Harry Styles, Taylor Swift’s ex and also member of hit boyband One Direction or with Niall. Lim was now gone- having left the band to ahunt a house, which added to the tension in the room. Zayn was attempting to comfort Louise who had not been given a trigger warning for awkward silences. Louise was deeply triggered. Y/N glanced up from her avocado toast to try and find the organic oat milk for her iced coffee. She spotted it beside Harry Styles, Taylor Swift’s ex and also member of hit boyband One Direction’s arm. “Pass the organic oat milk.” She said emotionlessly. Harry Styles, Taylor Swift’s ex and also member of hit boyband One Direction grabbed tge milk to pass it to her and then stopped, holding it above her head. “Why won’y you talk to me?” said he as he stared at her with his steely cold orbs. Y/N defiantly remainted silent. “Just pass her the milk.” Said Zayne. “IT’S ORGANIC OAT MILK!!!!!!!” screamed Niall and Harry Styles, Taylor Swift’s ex and also member of hit boyband One Direction at the same time. They stared at eachother in shock.m How did they both know Y/N only drank organic oat milk|?
Author’s Note: After being hit by my car (I was texting and driving and also drunk), the author has made a miraculous recovery and will be continuing the novel despite their 47 fractured bones.
“Rrrhg” says lim. The gang weer in the haunted house in which,im haunted and resisded. After the dramnatic growl jus heard from lim, the gruup gave rond if appulayse for his scary abilities, like monusters univeristirs. Haarry Sdtyles, talor swift;s ex and also member of hit boyband one direvtion felt jealous and burxst into song, “BBQ YOU LUGHT UP MY LIFE LIKE NOBODY ELSE!!!” Lim grew angry at Harry Style’s, talor siwft’s ex and also member of hit boyndand one direction and started a fist fight with the nearest ghost- walaugi. “WAAAAAAAAA” screamed Walaugi as Lim hit him in face. Y/N stood between the tow and like Bella Swan in twilight, begged tgem to stop fighting. They dud. Then a flight came down from the ceiling, illuminating Y/N. She bagn to sing and as she did she ascended to the heavens because she was aactual;y the chosen agnel queen. The on=ther one driecrtion members and also walugli watched as asshe ascended. Nail slapped hi knees, “right! Well we best be off thrn!”. The gang left the haunedt house and went homr.
THE END!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!