Chapter Text
Things weren’t right, not by far, but in the Master’s house there was food, hot food, in great quantities, as well as beer. Bilbo would have been perfectly happy with just that, but then Nori whispered to his ear that he’d found a bathroom, and the hobbit could have kissed him right there and then, which would have been awful.
No public kissing was the first rule they hadn’t laid, because they didn’t speak about whatever was happening between them. But unspoken rules were still rules.
Bilbo did, however, push Nori against a wall to kiss him as soon as they arrived into an empty corridor. He wasn’t usually that aggressive, but he was tired, and he had drunk a little… and Nori had pinched his bum, which had called for retribution. They had been giggling like children by the time they had reached that bathroom, and the servant waiting for them there had given them a queer look.
“Is that your wife?” she had asked, pointing at Bilbo.
“Nah, he’s kin,” Nori retorted with a flirtatious smirk to the girl, pushing his hobbit inside before Bilbo could protest that anyone with their eyes could see he wasn’t a woman. He still told Nori exactly that once the door was closed behind them.
“Well, you’re travelling with dwarves, you don’t have as much beard as us, and you’re mighty pretty. Can’t blame her for getting ideas. Bet I know more than one chap who’d take you as his wife.”
“Ah. Ah. Keep that up, and I promise you that I’m washing alone,” Bilbo announced haughtily. He squeak when Nori grabbed him by the belt and pulled him to his chest.
“Now, that’d be a waste, pretty thing like you alone in that big tub,” the dwarf purred into his ear. “All that water just for you? And me the one who ordered the bath and all, most unfair.”
Bilbo laughed, and started undressing himself. Nori tried to help, but it just made everything more complicated, not that Bilbo minded much. The dwarf was good with his hands, and by the time they were both naked, the hobbit felt more than ready for a bit of fun.
When they were clean, they dried and dressed up again, Bilbo feeling more relaxed than he had been since they had left Beorn’s house. Nori’s skillful hands were always so good at making him feel better, and judging by the grin on the dwarf’s lips, the effect was mutual. He almost didn’t mind anymore that they were leaving at dawn for a mountain that they would have less than one day to climb.
“Hey, burglar, you dropped something,” Nori told him, bending down to catch a small golden ring. “Now, that’s rather pretty, where did you get that?”
Bilbo stopped breathing, and before he could think properly about it, he had grabbed Sting on the ground and was pressing it against Nori’s throat. He didn’t know who was the most surprised out of the two of them, but it didn’t matter, because he was the one with a sword in hand.
“Drop that.”
“Relax,” Nori laughed nervously. “I just picked it up for you, nothing more, no reason to…”
“Drop. That,” Bilbo growled, pressing his blade against his lover’s skin, almost enough to draw blood. He saw Nori stare at him in disbelief, then look at the ring in his hand, as if trying to understand… and Bilbo couldn’t allow him to understand. Nori would steal it it if he understood, and Bilbo couldn’t allow that because the ring was his and his only, and if that damn dwarf thought he could steal it from him…
A drop of blood pearled down Nori’s throat. Deep down inside, Bilbo knew it was wrong, worse than with the small spider in the forest, because his was Nori, who was a friend and more than a friend, Nori who had helped him all along, Nori whose kisses tasted of spices and bad smoking weed…
Nori who threw the ring toward Bilbo and crawled away looking terrified… and Bilbo knew he should have apologized for this, because he liked that damn dwarf…
Instead, he knelt down to take his ring on the floor.
“It’s mine,” he spat, looking at the golden circle in his hand. “Mine.”
“Yeah? Well keep that shit,” Nori retorted, voice shaking. “I just picked it up for you!”
“It’s mine,” Bilbo shouted, eyes snapping up to glare at the dwarf. “You had no right to touch it!”
“Won’t be the only thing I won’t be touching again, you fucking nutjob! Keep you fucking ring and go fuck it, because I won’t be doing it again, trust me!”
Once more, Bilbo felt a tug inside him, a voice pushing him to apologize, to not let Nori grab his coat and leave, but Nori had touched the ring, and that was wrong. So Bilbo didn’t move when the dwarf slam the door behind him, because he didn’t need him, didn’t need anyone or anything but his ring…
A ring that he dropped when the realization of what had happened hit him.
He had hurt Nori.
Over a piece of gold.
He had hurt Nori, and he would have killed him if Nori hadn’t given back the ring, just like he had killed that spider, and it was a terrifying thought.
But the worst, he realized as he tried to calm down and breathe again…
The worst, the very worst, was that if he was given another chance, he’d do the same again.
Chapter Text
“Bilbo has a magic ring.”
It was just five words.
“Bilbo has a magic ring.”
Nori hadn’t even been sure how important those words were when he said them, but Gandalf turned to him, looking not like the foolish old man he often was, but like a great and powerful wizard.
“Bilbo has a magic ring.”
Nori didn’t know much about enchanted rings, and even less about hobbits, but he felt sure the two didn’t usually mix.
“Bilbo has a magic ring.”
And Bilbo had been ready to kill him in Laketown over that right. It wasn’t the first time someone fucked Nori and then tried to kill him, but it had been a long while since he’d felt so betrayed and hurt over it. Because Bilbo had mattered… Bilbo still mattered, and Nori was sure that the hobbit would never have hurt him if not for that ring…
And maybe it was just wishful thinking. But he’d gone to Gandalf anyway, because he had to be sure before he left Bilbo behind.
“Bilbo has a magic ring.”
“And what does it do?” the wizard asked.
“Makes him invisible.”
It was what Bilbo has said when Nori had finally confronted him about it in Erebor. It was not all that the ring did, however.
“It makes him aggressive, too. He dropped it once, I picked it for him, he threatened to kill me if I didn’t let go of it.”
“Did you pick it up or… pick it up?” Gandalf wondered. Which was a fair question, of course, and Nori knew it.
“It had actually really fallen on the ground, and there could be no doubt about it because we were both there when it happened. I did not borrow it from him, I just tried to be helpful, and he attacked me.”
And Bilbo would have killed him, he was sure of it. Nori had a long experience in these things. He knew the posture of a man who would only kill you on accident because he didn’t actually want it. He also knew what someone who was prepared to stab you repeatedly until you stopped moving looked like.
Bilbo had looked more like a second, only Nori was fairly sure that him not moving anymore might not have stopped the stabbing right away.
“How long has he had that ring?”
“Since the goblins’ caves. He found it there. Well, won it actually, from a creature… that all he would tell me.”
Bilbo had pushed him away after admitting that, one hand on that small sword of his… Nori hadn’t insisted.
He’d been too scared to insist.
“Where is Bilbo now?” Gandalf asked.
“In the cooks’ tent, with Bombur. Helping.”
Nori hadn’t talked to the hobbit since the day he’d forced him to explain about the ring, but he still always knew where Bilbo was.
It was a habit he’d developed over time. Someone had to know where their burglar was, and since no one else seemed to care, Nori had taken that task upon himself.
He knew what it was like to be small and half unwanted in a group, and before he’d even started liking the hobbit, he’d made sure to always know where he was. Someone had to.
“Let’s go see him,” Gandalf decided, a deep frown on his face. “It might be nothing… or it might be everything. Too much has happened recently to let this go unchecked.”
Bilbo denied having a ring of any sort.
It wasn’t such a surprise, all things considered. And the glare he threw toward Nori wasn’t too surprising either.
“I must insist to see it, Bilbo,” Gandalf said, ignoring the hobbit’s protests. “That ring might be more than you think, and…”
“You only want to steal it!” Bilbo snapped, grabbing the nearest thing available as a weapon. It was just a laddle, but he managed to make it seem menacing. “I expected it from Nori, who’s nothing but a thief and already tried once… but you I thought I could trust! I won’t let you have it, it is mine! I won it fair and square, and if you want it, you’ll have to kill… if I don’t kill you first.”
Nori’s breath caught in his throat.
It was worse than he’d thought. It was one thing for the hobbit to threaten him. They were nothing to each other, just friends and a little more than friends, so Nori didn’t matter, not really… but Gandalf and Bilbo had known each other for a lifetime, and this wasn’t normal.
“Do you hear yourself?” the wizard asked. “Death threats… and not the first one you have uttered, I am told. What would your mother say of this? I do not think Belladonna Took raised her only son to treat his friends so. And we are your friends, even if you doubt it in this moment.”
“No, you came only to steal from me!”
Gandalf laughed bitterly. “Here? In broad daylight, in a tent full of knives and heavy things that you can use to protect yourself? I am offended, Bilbo Baggins. If I were to turn into a thief, I would become a better one than this.”
The hobbit chuckled confusedly, smiling tentatively at the wizard, as if he couldn’t quite remember what smiles were supposed to be like.
“It’s just a ring you know, it’s nothing special. Quite boring to look at, I’m sure there are many in Erebor that are more beautiful and more interesting than it.”
“And yet my dear boy, it is this one that I wish to see.”
Bilbo hesitated, throwing a distressed look around as if he hoped that someone would come to his rescue. No one came. Bilbo sighed, and plunged his hand in his pocket. When he pulled it back, it was a tight fist, and Gandalf had to ask again (softly, so softly, as if the hobbit might break) to see the ring. Reluctantly, the hobbit slightly opened his hand, just enough to catch a glimpse of gold on his palm. Gandalf big fingers took hold of Bilbo’s smaller ones (they were so small, like a child’s, Nori thought, and the idea scared him for some reason) and gently forced him to open his hand entirely.
The ring really was a plain thing. Just an old golden band, and it was almost hard to believe it had any sort of power. Nori had heard about magic rings, he’d been told about the rings of power and how beautiful they were, and this small thing in Bilbo’s shaking hand didn’t look anything special.
It still made Nori shiver.
At least, Gandalf either didn’t look too happy. He hesitantly reached out for the ring with one hand, the other one firmly staying on Bilbo’s hand. One of his fingers brushed against the gold, and he quickly withdrew his hand as if he had been burned.
“Nori, I believe that Radagast is somewhere near the wounded’s tents,” the wizard stated, his voice wavering slightly. “I would appreciate if you could fetch him for me. And I suppose… tell all those of Thorin’s company who can walk to come to the king’s tent. I fear we have a bit of a... situation here.”
Notes:
I always find Nori so hard to write in a dramatic/serious setting
why do I do this to myself?
('cause it's fun)
(that's why)
Chapter 3
Summary:
The nature of Bilbo's ring is discussed, and a few things are decided concerning it.
Notes:
(See the end of the chapter for notes.)
Chapter Text
Thorin’s tent was big, but not nearly big enough to hold nine dwarves, a hobbit and a wizard. They were all packed too close to each others, and to get some space to himself, Bilbo was forced to hide near Thorin’s bed. It was more than a little awkward, especially since things had been a little tense between them since that business with the Arkenstone. Bilbo was sure that Thorin knew he had intended to keep it to himself, knew how he had desired that beautiful gem that should have remained his, because after all that he had done for these dwarves, didn’t he deserve the very best their mountain had to offer… they would never have gone so far without him, he deserved…
But the stone meant Thorin’s right to rule, the king had explained, and without it he was an impostor, without power against the army of men and elves that had besieged Erebor… Thorin had explained that Dain would have had more rights than him over the mountain if he didn’t have the gem, and that it was why he had asked Bilbo to retrieve it.
Bilbo would have kept it anyway, but he had felt Nori’s eyes on him. It had reminded him of Laketown, somehow, except the stone wasn’t as precious as his ring… and Thorin was his friend, his employer, and he needed the Arkenstone, so Bilbo had given it back to him.
But Thorin knew, he knew, and the hobbit had rather avoided him since that day, not that it had been too hard. So much had happened, negotiations and then that terrible battle…
It had been easy to avoid everyone, until Gandalf had asked to see his ring.
Why he had asked that, Bilbo wasn’t sure, because he’d been so good at hiding it…
Only, that was a lie, wasn’t it?
It had to be Nori.
It always was Nori.
Everything bad that happened to him was Nori (everything good too, a voice reminded him, and don’t you miss having him around, how nice and casual and easy it was to be his friend).
He hated Nori.
Almost as much as he liked him.
But this wasn’t the time to think about it. While Bilbo was trying hard to not give any excuses to Thorin to talk to him, Gandalf arrived with Fili, bringing the number of dwarves present to ten.
“Dwalin and Gloin still cannot move,” the wizard announced. “We will have to do without them. Bilbo, why are you hiding back there? Come closer, you are what interests us today. Come, and show us that ring.”
The hobbit hesitated, his hand clenching around the golden band. It was tempting to put it on and disappear, escape their eyes… he didn’t want anyone looking at him as if he were something queer, he’d had enough of that already in his life, he just wanted to go away… but Gandalf found a little table that he put where everyone could see it, and Bilbo breathed again. If he put the ring there, they would look at it, not at him.
He didn’t like the idea of anyone seeing the ring, but right at that moment it seemed better than people looking at him.
There was a heavy silence in the tent after he reluctantly dropped the ring on that table. Stepping back, Bilbo observed his friends, one hand on Sting’s hilt, just in case anyone thought they could steal from him.
The dwarves didn’t seem too impressed. He heard Oin mumbled something about that right being amateur work, and that he had never seen so plain. Balin nodded in answer. Bofur made a dirty joke that had Bombur chuckling and Bifur rolling his eyes, while the younger dwarves tried to look politely interested.
Nori was looking at Bilbo, not at the ring. For a second their eyes met, but they both looked away at the same time.
Gandalf looked grim, which Bilbo had expected. It was a surprise however to glance at Radagast, and see him almost has severe. It was the first time Bilbo had seen him look like a proper wizard. He didn’t like it.
“What are we supposed to be looking at?” Thorin asked from where he was lying on his bed. Bilbo dared not turn and look at him.
“We are looking at a ring, King Thorin,” Gandalf answered gravely. “A simple golden ring, with no marks on it, not even to indicate who made it. A ring that can make you invisible, it seems… or make you forget who your friends are.”
“I know who my friends are,” Bilbo retorted. “And anyone who steals from me is no friend!”
He saw Nori flinch slightly, but pushed the thought away. He had to make things clear, had to make sure no one stole from him again, because being betrayed by Nori of all people had hurt too much…
“I didn’t know there were still magic rings around,” Radagast said. “I thought save for the great ones, the elves and dwarves had destroyed them all?”
“And those that weren’t destroyed lost their power long ago. The great rings were the only ones crafted by anyone strong enough to maintain their magic so long. Unless the art to make them was found again, this must be a Ring of Power.”
There were gasps and whispers in the tent at that announcement, as well as a few glances toward Bilbo, some of the dwarves looking curious, most of them appearing scared.
“I know the elves still have the three,” Thorin claimed. “And the nine, everyone knows where they are. It could be one of the Seven, most of which are lost now… but I have seen drawings of them, and none of them were plain. The Lord in the East knew our tastes and made his presents accordingly, with engravings and gems. But if it is not one of the Nine, the Seven or the Three, then it would be…”
The king didn’t dare finish, and there was a heavy silence as Gandalf nodded slowly.
“If it is neither one of the Nine, the Seven or the Three, then it might be the One Ring.”
This time all the eyes turned to Bilbo, and it took all of his willpower to not surge ahead, grab his ring again, and disappear for ever. He didn’t want people to look at him. It had to stop, and it had to stop now, and he would make them stop if he had to…
When he felt his hand clench on his sword’s hilt, Bilbo forced himself to relax. These were his friends, not nosy relatives and neighbours spying his every moment. They weren’t looking at him to find something to gossip about. They were looking at him because they were worried over something he didn’t quite understand.
“I think there must be some sort of mistake here,” he claimed, using his most business-like tone, because if it was business it was less likely to hurt. “You see, I have heard of Rings of Power, it’s a tale that was sometimes told to my cousins and I during winter nights. I thought it was just this, a tale. And I remember quite well how the story goes: the Lord of the Ring was killed, his power destroyed, and the magic rings lost their magic. So you see, my ring cannot be one of these, because it still has all of its magic.”
“He’s not quite dead, no,” Radagast sighed. “Not quite at all. I wished he was, we wouldn’t have had all that trouble with the orcs last week. Terrible business, that. He was only defeated but that boy… What was it, Elessar?”
“Isildur,” Gandalf corrected. “He cut off Sauron’s finger, making him lose the One Ring, in which he had put much of his power… too much, perhaps. But the One Ring was lost long ago, and nowhere near the Misty Mountains where Bilbo found it. If I had not been fighting a spirit that was most likely Sauron so recently…”
“It was him,” Radagast cut him. “Who else would have had that power?”
“More people than you realize,” Gandalf retorted haughtily, and the other wizard rolled his eyes. “We are without news of our… cousins. Should one of them have taken a turn for the worst…”
“Yes, yes. Please, do say that I would not have noticed Alatar and Pallando coming into my forest, even under some disguise. We all enjoy it so much when you treat us like Saruman. No, it wasn’t an Istari, I’m sure of it.”
Gandalf glared at Radagast, who glared back. Bilbo was suddenly reminded of family dinners from his youth, and of his grandfather and his sister, who only got along well when they were separated.
It was not a good memory.
“Well, admitting that this Sauron character is alive,” he said to prevent any chance of a fight, “What proof is there that my ring is his? It just turns me invisible, nothing more. It doesn’t sound like something a great evil force would have much use of.”
Some of the dwarves nodded in agreement (but not Nori, who was still staring at Bilbo).
“The Ring, from what I am told, can accomplish anything that its owner desires,” Gandalf explained. “It appears that the only thing you want is to not be seen… supposing it is the One Ring, of course. There is no way to know that for sure… None that I know of, at least. But I suppose Gondor would have archives about the Ring. Isildur was rather fond of writing about his own glory, I am told.”
“Well then, yougo to Gondor, and…”
“If you are going to suggest I go there and come back to you afterward to tell you about it, think again” Gandalf warned (and it had been exactly what Bilbo would have suggested, though he would never admit it now). “If there is but the slightest chance that this ring is the One, measures must be taken to destroy it.”
“The forges of Erebor…” Balin started.
“We will try,” Gandalf cut him. “But I fear a stronger fire will be needed to destroy it. It was forged in Mount Doom, and I fear nothing less than it will destroy the One. It must be taken to Mordor, and thrown into the volcano.”
Bilbo yelped, but there was a great shout inside his mind.
They couldn’t destroy his ring. He needed it. He’d been nothing before he found it, only a coward without any brain, nothing but a dead weight, nothing but Mad Baggins who refused to marry, refused to make friends, refused to do anything that involved other people because they always hurt you in the end.
He needed that ring, because it was the only value he had.
He couldn’t let them destroy it, he had to protect it.
“Is there no other way about it?” he asked. “It is my ring now, I own it and it obeys to me… Can’t I keep it? I would never use it for anything evil!”
Not as long as no one tried to steal it from him.
But killing thieves wasn’t evil.
“You might not use it with evil in mind,” Radagast muttered, “but such artefacts have a mind of their own, and it would use you for its own purposes. It must be cast into fire, or the world will never know true peace.”
They were all looking at Bilbo again, and he forced himself to keep as blank a face as possible. He couldn’t let his enemies know he had a plan.
“Very well then, so be it,” he said calmly. “And who will bring it to Mordor? You, or Gandalf?”
“Neither of us,” the Grey Wizard answered. “It would be too dangerous for either of us to be confronted to the temptation of its power. We must find someone willing to cross the world and go into the East.”
“Well, then,” Bilbo said. “There’s no way around it. I’ll do it. It’s my ring after all, it’s only fair that I’d be the one to carry it.”
“It would be dangerous,” Nori grunted. It was the first time in days that Bilbo heard his voice, and he found that he’d missed it… but he could not allow himself to get distracted, he had a plan… and maybe he could use Nori for it.
“It will be dangerous, yes. But not as dangerous as what might happen if anyone but me lays a finger on that ring,” the hobbit said, forcing himself to laugh. “I do not want to hurt anyone, and you are all my friends… but as Nori can tell you, I forget who is a friend and who is not when I fear for that ring. And I think if I was not allowed to take it to Mordor myself, then you would have to lock me up to prevent me from going after whoever will go.”
He felt their eyes on them again, and this time they were all scared. For him or of him, he could not have said. It did not matter as long as they let him keep the ring.
He needed that ring. He was nothing without it, nothing but a lonely fool with doilies…
He needed that ring.
He didn’t like the way Gandalf was staring at him, as if he could read his thoughts… but he needed the ring, and that was all that mattered. Still, Gandalf was a wizard, and maybe he could read minds. So Bilbo pushed away his need of the ring, and focus instead on how sick he had been each time he’d lost control because of it, how horrified he’d been after hurting Nori, how much he missed the easy trust he’d had with the thief, as well as all the other dwarves.
And it must have worked, because Gandalf’s face went from suspicion to pity.
“Then so be it,” the wizard sighed. “You, Bilbo Baggins, will carry that ring into Mordor. But of course, you cannot go alone.”
Bilbo almost shouted in victory. It would be so easy to slip away from Gandalf. And he would have his ring then, always and forever.
He needed that ring.
He needed it, and nothing else.
Notes:
There's a line between writing angsty drama, and there's shoving all your angsty headcanon in one single fic
I didn't quite mean for this to happen... but I don't quite regret it.
Chapter 4
Summary:
The fellowship of the ring is formed
even if they don't call themselves that
Chapter Text
They tried melting the ring in the forges of Erebor, but Nori already knew it wouldn’t work. Hidden in the shadows nearby, he’d observed the hobbit closely. Bilbo had let go of that ring too easily for it to work, as if he’d felt that his damn piece of gold was safe.
Still, it was a shock to see the ring come out not entirely unchanged. On its once smooth sides were now engraved letters that Ori pronounced to be Elvish, but that he said he could not read well.
“Black Speech,” Gandalf said gravely. “And what it says makes it more likely than ever that we found or Enemy’s greatest weapon…”
“I think at that point we can safely say that it’s the One for sure,” Radagast noted. “Who else would use Black Speech on a magic ring revealed by flame? It’s pretty showy, really. Not the sort of accessory I’d pick, it’s pretty tacky.”
And that was saying a lot, Nori thought, if a crazy wizard with bird shit on his face thought you were tacky.
“I will still go to Gondor to see everything I can find on the One,” Gandalf replied. “I will go first, alone, to get there as fast as possible. Get ready and start going East as soon as you can, with Bilbo… and whoever will want to follow.”
There was a yelp near them.
“What?” Bilbo cried.
“I am not sending you alone,” Gandalf reminded him kindly. “Radagast will protect you and guide you, and a few of your friends mentioned their desire to help you, I think.”
He looked at Nori as he said so, even if they hadn’t talked about it. They didn’t have to. Nori was the one who had started this, he had to stay there until the end.
Thieves too knew how to do the right thing.
“Aye, we’re not letting you go like that!” Bofur exclaimed. “You’re one of us, you fought with you, you’re like family now! And family sticks together. No getting rid of me that easily, Bilbo.”
The hobbit didn’t smile. If anything, he looked horrified, and it only got worse when Ori and Kili stepped ahead.
“I’m coming too!” They announced simultaneously, before glaring at each other. Nori thought it was a terrible idea to have them both go, after all that had passed between them. He didn’t have time to protest though, because Bilbo started flailing and crying that he couldn’t let them come.
“It’s far too dangerous, and you’ve only just got your home back… you’ll be needed here! I cannot ask this of you, I just can’t!”
“Well, you’re not asking anything of us,” Ori stated, taking a step to the side to get as far away from Kili as was possible. “We’re doing it because we want to. It’s just as Bofur said, you’re our friend and more than a friend, you’re like family! I see you as a brother mister Baggins, just as much as Nori or Dori!”
And that was the wrong thing to say of course. Nori saw Bilbo’s distress increase, and their eyes met for a second before they both looked away.
It was going to be a long way to Mordor.
“It’s not just due to affection,” Kili added, stepping away too. “Affection isn’t all that matters. One must do what one’s duty commands, and clearly, it’s the fate of the entire world that could be at stake here! If we didn’t do it for you, we’d do it anyway because it’s the right thing to do. I only hope you will allow us to protect us, and see we only do it to help.”
It was going to be a very long way to Mordor, Nori thought. He’d have to go talk to Thorin, tell him to keep his nephew on a leash maybe, because he was on Ori’s side in this… or maybe he could talk to the boys and beg them to discuss their problems once and for all before they all left. No one else was coming after all. He wanted Ori by his side, but with their only other companions a hobbit going mad, a wizard gone mad long ago, and Bofur who was worse than the other two, they could use a trained warrior like Kili.
"I thought it would be just me and Gandalf," Bilbo whispered. "This changes everything..."
"Aye... and we'll keep you safe!" Bofur promised. “So don’t you worry, we won’t leave you alone for even one second.”
If anything, Bilbo’s panic seemed to increase at that, but he still managed, and to thank them for their help. He sounded almost sincerely glad to have them with him… but his hand was on his sword, and as soon as Gandalf allowed him to, he grabbed tweezers to plunge his ring in water. As soon as it was cold again, the hobbit put it back in his pocket, and kept his hand there.
It was going to be a terribly long way to Mordor.
But there was nothing else to do.
Dori took the news surprisingly well, all things considered.
“I rather expected you to follow that hobbit anyway,” he told Nori, trying to sit up and failing. “I was glad that for once you’d found someone who wasn’t at risk of killing you in a moment of boredom… but no, you really know how to choose them, don’t you?”
“He wouldn’t be like that normally. He wasn’t like that when it started.”
Dori nodded slowly, wincing as he tried to find a comfortable position without moving his legs. Before he could ask, Nori helped him sit as much as he could, and rearranged the pillows best as he could. It made him feel almost guilty, leaving Dori behind, alone and with legs that would never fully heal, one elven doctor had said… but Nori had gotten Bilbo and himself in that mess, and he had to see it them both out of it.
“Ori came earlier, he said he was going too,” Dori grunted, laying back again on his pillow. “He wasn’t sure about you, but he wouldn’t change his mind. He said he had already promised, and it was too late now.”
“He offered himself in front of everyone, and Bilbo accepted,” Nori confirmed.
“Well, that’s probably for the best. Getting away from prince Kili can only do him good, after all that happened… and maybe by the time he comes back, they will be able to make up.”
Nori nodded silently. If his little brother hadn’t seen the point in mentioning that the young prince was coming with them, then Nori wouldn't be the one to reveal it. He'd seen the results of spilling the secrets of people he cared about. He'd lost Bilbo, he couldn't afford to lose Ori too.
"I don't think you should hope too much," he still told Dori. "They were more furious at each other than everlast I checked. If you were dreaming of marrying the baby to royalty, think again."
"The only reason they are so upset is because they love each other. Give them a little time apart, they'll see they both overreacted and they'll make up in no time."
Nori didn't insist. In the state Dori was in, better let him believe what he wanted, if it made things easier for him.
"You take good care of Ori, you hear me?" Dori ordered. "Make sure he remembers to eat, that he stays warm and clean, and that he doesn't get hurt. And take care of yourself too. I don't care how important that mission of yours might be for the world. I refuse to lose my brothers."
"I'll be careful," Nori lied. "And I'll protect Ori with all I have... if and only if he needs it."
Dori glared at his brother. He chose to ignore that last remark though, and they started talking about what they would need to take with them. With that madman Radagast in charge of things, it would pay to be perfectly prepared before he started giving instructions... if he ever gave them.
Gandalf left the very evening after they had tried to melt the ring. He had borrowed a horse from the elves (more like stolen, Nori learned later) and ridden away. Before he left, he reminded Radagast that he too would have to go before the week was over.
"He always thinks I forget things," the brown wizard grumbled after Gandalf was gone. "I don't, not when it's important. But I suppose we'll have to start preparing..."
"We need food, but that's being taken care of," Nori announced. "We're getting dried meat from Dain's cooks, and Bombur is preparing cram. I have talked to Thorin, he gives us our surviving ponies, and Balin will go tomorrow to the mountain to find us some money. It should be mostly gold, but he hopes to find some silver coins too, and that would be more manageable. We'd get in trouble, paying only in gold. I have started negotiating with some of Dain's soldiers to get travel supplies and winter clothes. I'll go back to them in the morning and see how that goes. We should be ready to go in three days."
"You managed to plan all of this in one afternoon?" Bofur gasped.
"I could have had more than that ready, but I had to go see Dori to warn him."
The miner still whistled, while Radagast stuttered and tried to find something to say. It had been perhaps a little unkind to drop that much information on his head all at once, but Nori wasn't in a mood to lose time. The sooner they left the sooner Bilbo would be free of the influence of that accursed ring. Nori didn't have any illusions about their chances to be friends again, but he'd rather have had Bilbo hate him of his own free will.
"Well, if all is ready, I think we can leave in two days then," Radagast eventually managed to say. "I think it's for the best."
"But the victory feast is in four days!" Bofur protested.
"I'm afraid you'll have to choose between beer and Bilbo," Nori informed him.
"Toughest choice of my life. Don't take it wrong Bilbo, but, you know... beer."
In answer the hobbit laughed loudly, for the first time since Laketown. If it made Nori jealous, no one had to know
"Don't worry, I don't feel offended in the least," he told Bofur. "If anything, I'm touched that I count for you as much as beer does."
"Nay, you count more... But I've been promised beer since Ered Luin, you know. Had some at your place, but I felt I deserved some more. You’ll owe me a pint, soon as the trouble’s over and we’re someplace civilized.”
Bilbo laughed again, and promised that he would help Bofur get as drunk as he’d like. Kili immediately asked for the same treatment, preferably before they came back to Erebor. he claimed it wouldn’t be a real party if Thorin was anywhere near them. Bilbo readily agreed, smiling widely and looking once more like the cheerful hobbit he’d been sometimes, whenever he had managed to relax a little. For a short moment, it felt almost as if they were going for a trip between friends, And Nori was almost tempted to joke with them too, maybe tease Ori and ask if he’d get drunk with them…
It would have been easy to laugh, if he hadn’t been looking so closely at Bilbo, if he hadn’t seen the hand in his pocket, the fabric of it outlining a clenched fist.
But as long as that ring would be around, Nori didn’t think he’d manage to laugh.
Chapter 5
Summary:
The fellowship that doesn't call itself a fellowship leaves Erebor
Chapter Text
They left the camp near Dale three days after Gandalf, and reached the remains of Laketown four days later. It was a shock to see the state of the city. It had not been glorious, but now it just wasn’t there. All that was left where ashes and the remains of a few burned posts here and there.
Kili was shaking by the time they approached the refugee’s camp on the bank. Bilbo, who was next to him, put a hand on his shoulder to comfort him, but the young dwarf was so startled that he almost fell from his pony.
“Well, that’s quite the reaction,” Bilbo commented. “Are you okay?”
“No, not quite,” the prince replied in a whisper. “I just can’t help but fear Smaug isn’t really dead, that he’ll rise from that lake and kill us all… I still hear the screams and the smell, and… I almost died, mister Baggins. I was so sick, and if Fili and Bofur hadn’t managed to carry me to safety…”
“You almost died quite a few times on that trip, I don’t remember you being so anxious the other times.”
Kili nodded sadly. “I wasn’t helpless the other times. It’s so awful, being helpless and having to depend on others… I hated it,” he sighed, glancing briefly at Ori with a pensive expression. He shook his head, and turned again to Bilbo. “Beside, there’s a difference between some orcs and a dragon. You can kill orcs, but a dragon? Not so easy, believe me. If Bard and Tauriel hadn't been there…”
Bilbo awkwardly stared at the reins in his hands, feeling the guilt of what had happened with the dragon gnaw at him. Thorin had thought it was his fault what had happened, but Bilbo knew better. He was the one who had awakened the dragon, he was the one who had given Smaug the idea of taking out his anger on the humans…
“Oh, looks like we have a friend coming our way,” Radagast exclaimed. “At least I hope she’s a friend.”
“Not sure,” Nori grunted, looking at the figure running their way. “I think it’s Bard’s oldest girl…”
“Then it is a friend indeed!” Kili retorted joyfully.
He wasn’t shaking anymore, and before anyone could stop him, the prince was galloping toward Sigrid. As soon as he was near her, he jumped off of his pony to talk to her. The conversation looked animated enough, but Kili, who had started excited enough, quickly calmed down. Much too soon, he and Sigrid shook hands, and he quickly returned to the group, a frown on his face.
“We can’t go in the camp,” he announced. “Sigrid says it might be dangerous, and that people… well, they’re not too happy with us. They seem to think it’s our fault if the dragon attacked…”
“It is our fault,” Ori replied coldly, “in case you forgot.”
“I wasn’t there, so yeah, I forgot, sorry.”
The two young dwarves looked seconds away from having another fight when Nori hurriedly said that they didn’t need anything from the human camp anyway. Both boys quickly looked away, but Bilbo knew it would not last. Before he could stop himself, the hobbit glanced at Nori to find him looking back, with an expression that said well enough that he too thought it would be a long way to Mordor… But just like the young ones, they both looked away as soon as they realized what they were doing.
There had been a time when they might have laughed at how unreasonable the children were, and Nori would have suggested to bet on how long it would take them to make up again and be sneaking away together to kiss…
But that time was gone, and Bilbo wasn’t sure it would ever return. He had tried to kill Nori, over a stupid ring… but a ring that was more precious to him than anything else in the world, a ring that he had to protect, even against people who called themselves his friends and claimed they were helping him. A ring that was giving him everything he had ever wanted, courage and the capacity to go unseen, and if he was unseen then people couldn’t point at him and judge him.
Still, it was only a ring, and Nori had been so much more than that.
It wasn’t difficult to ride around the camp, but it was still annoying, and a loss of time. Radagast, in a surprising moment of caution, decided it would be better to ride as far away from the humans as possible, just in case they decided that they were angry enough to go out in the night and kill people they had treated as heroes only two weeks earlier. Nori agreed with that decision, and so it was adopted. It almost made Bilbo laugh. Gandalf might have put his strange friend in charge, but the dwarves and himself were prepared to side with Nori rather than him in all things.
It was a quiet night around their fire. None of them had expected to be welcomed by the humans with open arms, but needing to hide that way hadn’t been in their plans either. Kili in particular seemed very affected, and he was the first to go to sleep. The rest of them soon followed, except for Ori, who as usual volunteered for the first watch.
“You need to sleep, kid,” Bofur told him. “Just ‘cause Dori isn’t around doesn’t mean you can do just anything stupid.”
“Leave him alone,” Nori grunted. “He’s old enough to be taking stupid decisions if he wants.”
“He’ll fall asleep and fall from his pony! Someone’s got to take care of the lil’ one.”
Ori clenched his fists and glared at the ground, but said nothing.
“I think we can trust Ori to know what he’s doing,” Bilbo said cautiously, avoiding to look at anyone but Bofur. “He made it this far, and escaped that terrible battle unharmed… I think we can trust him to know his limits.”
It wasn’t easy to ignore the boy’s grateful looks, or Nori’s pleased but suspicious ones, but Bilbo managed it. Bofur didn’t looked too convinced, but it didn’t matter: we the three of them agreeing, he had lost already. He seemed to notice it fairly quickly too, but being Bofur, he made a show of it all, speaking of brotherly duties, of how he would have done the same for “wee lil’ Bom’”. By the end of it, Bilbo was fighting not to laugh, and Ori was grinning.
Bilbo was glad that the atmosphere had lightened a little, at last.
It would be easier to make his escape if Ori wasn’t on the edge.
He almost felt bad for it, but it was the perfect moment for it. Ori hadn’t slept enough since… probably since Mirkwood and his fight with Kili, really, but he’d slept even less than usual since they had left Erebor. It was awful to take advantage of this, especially with how much the boy fought to be taken seriously… Once it was found that he had let Bilbo escape, he would be criticized and treated as a child more than ever, and it wasn’t fair of Bilbo to do this to him… not when Ori had been so kind to him all along, even when the others treated him as a joke…
But he had to do it, for the ring.
The hobbit waited until he could hear the others snoring, and see that Nori was too limp to be only pretending to sleep, before he stood up again. Ori immediately turned his way, a dagger in hand, but relaxed when he saw Bilbo.
“Are you okay mister Baggins?”
“Yes, yes, quite. Just need to… you know,” Bilbo explained with a wave of his hand and a nod toward the darkness around them.
Ori stared at him blankly.
“I need to go wash my hands,” the hobbit clarified.
“Why would you want that? They don’t look that dirty to me, and I don’t see how that’s a bother when you’re sleeping anyway.”
Bilbo rolled his eyes. “I mean… I need to answer nature’s call.”
The young dwarf frowned, then burst out laughing as he put away his dagger. “Oh! You mean you need to pee! Well, that’s no problem. Let’s go then.”
The hobbit stared at him in horror.
“What do you mean ‘let’s go’? I do not need company when I… do my business!”
“You’re just going to make water, right?” Ori asked him suspiciously, and Bilbo’s face burned at the idea of what other things the boy could suspect him of doing.
“Of course that’s all I’m going to do!”
“Then I’ve got to stay close to you, mister Baggins. Only, there could still be a few orcs out there, and it might be dangerous… and mister Gandalf, he did insist on not leaving you alone at any time, because…” the boy hesitated, then took a deep breath and went on. “We can’t leave you alone, because at times you get weird with that ring, mister Baggins. I know bad stuff happened with you and Nori, and I remember how you were in Thorin’s tent, and this is really important, mister Baggins. Even if I like you a lot and I mostly trust you, I can’t be taking any risks, you see?”
Bilbo saw indeed, and what he saw was that it had been a mistake to think of taking advantage of Ori. He should have waited for a night when Bofur was keeping watch… because at least, Bofur didn’t feel like he had anything to prove.
“You were planning something,” Ori whispered, looking at the hobbit in horror. “So that’s why you were on my side against Bofur… I should have known. I’m just a kid, right, you must have thought it’d be easy… I trusted you, I thought you understood what it was like to have anyone treat you like brainless porcelaine, but in the end you’re just like the others.”
“I’m sorry,” Bilbo replied, and much to his surprise, it was sincere. He had to try to escape, but part of him was relieved that it had failed. Ori didn’t deserve that kind of trouble… and where would he have gone anyway? To the human camp, where they might have lynched him for being the dwarves allies? To the forest, to get lost or fall into the elvenking’s hands?
“Well, I’m sorry too, mister Baggins,” Ori retorted coldly. “Now, if you have anything to do, you’d better do it now and I’m coming too, or you go back to sleep, because there’s no reason for you to be tired. If you don’t, I’m afraid I’ll have to tell Nori.”
“Now you’re the one sounding like Dori,” Bilbo tried to joke, and after a few seconds, Ori snorted.
“Well, someone has to take care of you, mister Baggins. And I do like you, even if I’m less than happy with you right now, so… Did you hear that?”
“Hear what?”
Ori made a gesture to order him to stay silent. Staring intently into the darkness, he took out his dagger again. With one hand, he held it so that the blade would shine in the embers of their fire, and with the other he pushed Bilbo being him as if to shield him.
“I know you’re out there!” Ori called out to the empty dark before him, his voice clear and loud. Bilbo heard the rustle of the others waking up and trying to sit up behind them, but he didn’t turn their way. He was far too worried about what was hiding near them… until he heard a bright laughter not far.
“I told you that you were too noisy!” a voice said that the hobbit was sure to have heard before. “Even the dwarves noticed you!”
Bilbo frowned, trying to remember to whom the voice belonged. Before he could, Kili had jumped on his feet, looking as if it were Yuletide already.
“Tauriel!” He exclaimed happily, and Bilbo felt Ori flinch before him. “Tauriel, is that you?”
The laughter was heard again. “It is me. I thought dwarves saw well in the dark, have you all turned blind then?”
Kili laughed back at her as she stepped into the light, followed by that blonde elf Bilbo had vaguely understood to be some sort of nobility.
“We feared we would not catch up with you,” Tauriel said, quickly glancing at Bilbo before going to hug Kili, who enthusiastically hugged her back. “We asked in Erebor where you had gone, but no one would tell us… a few of them even insisted that you hadn’t left at all, that you were all just helping inside the mountain, and weren’t to be bothered just for the sake of some elves.”
“That sounds just like uncle,” the prince laughed, smiling brightly at her.
“And why were you looking for us?” Radagast asked sleepily, looking even more confused than usual. “No, first, who are you? Some of Gandalf’s elves from Lorien?”
“I am Tauriel of Mirkwood,” the red haired elf announced, “and this is prince Legolas, son of Thranduil, king of Mirkwood.”
“Ah, not Noldor then. Good, good… there’s a slight chance of you being reasonable people then,” the wizard sighed. “At least, more reasonable than Noldors.”
“Not a difficult feat,” Tauriel replied.
“No, I suppose not. And what do you want from us, then?”
“Nothing from you, Aiwendil,” prince Legolas claimed proudly. “We are here for the halfling.”
At these words, the four dwarves drew their weapons as one. Even Kili did, stepping away from Tauriel, his short sword in hand as he eyed his tall friend warily.
“I mean him no harm!” Legolas quickly exclaimed. “Quite the opposite, actually.” The elf walking to Bilbo, whom Ori was still hiding behind him. Legolas glared at the dwarf, but the boy didn’t move one inch. The elf sighed theatrically, and since he had no other options, he fell to one knee before the two of them. “Halfling, during the battle against the armies of Dol Guldur, you have saved my life. You protected me after a blow to the head made me weak and disoriented…”
“I only did what everyone else would have done!” Bilbo protested.
“And had any other done it, I would be before them as I am before you. I offer you my help and assistance, until I can repay my debt by saving your life as you saved mine. I do not know where you are going, with your dwarven friends who would fight anyone daring to approach you, and with a wizard to guide you… but I shall follow you, one way or another, and help you.”
“I don’t need you help! I already have more help than I need, thank you very much.”
“Master halfling…”
“It’s Bilbo, if you must know!” the hobbit protested. “And I don’t like being called halfling, if you must know. It was annoying enough when dwarves did it, I certainly won’t have a tall string of nothing like you call me that. I’m not a half of anything, thank you. I am a whole hobbit, and I don’t need nor want your help.”
It was already hard enough to trust people he’d know for weeks and who had deserved that trust, Bilbo thought. Having to also make things work with a perfect stranger who had threatened to kill his friends not so long ago was too much.
“Master hobbit, I must insist,” Legolas claimed. “My honour…”
“He means it about following you anyway,” Tauriel cut him, rolling her eyes. “You’d better just let us come, master Bilbo. It will be easier for everyone, and whatever it is you are doing, we will prove useful. We are good warriors and good hunters, we have friends beyond the borders of Mirkwood… and we know a song or two, if the mood strikes. I don’t sing so well myself, but Legolas has a lovely voice.”
“Tauriel!”
“Wait, I only saved hislife!” Bilbo mumbled, pointing at the prince who was still on one knee. “Why would you come too?”
“Where I go, he goes,” Tauriel simply stated. “And where he goes, I go. This is how things are for us. Whether we go with you or right behind you is your choice, however.”
It didn’t feel like a choice at all, Bilbo almost said, and he was starting to get rather annoyed by all these people trying to help him against his will. But at the same time, Kili had had nothing but praise for Tauriel each time he had spoken of her (which he did often enough), and he had mentioned that she and Legolas had helped a great deal in Laketown, that Tauriel has cured him from poison…
Radagast was supposed to know a bit about healing, but it wouldn’t hurt to have someone with some actual skill with them. And if the price to pay to have Tauriel was to let Legolas come too…
Beside, a dark part of Bilbo suggested to him, if he wanted to try to escape again, it would be easier with the elves around. All he would need would be a fight between them and the dwarves, and it would be the perfect diversion…
“Well, it can’t be avoided then,” he sighed. “Fine, you can come, but you’ll have to behave yourselves!”
“We will do our best to prove worthy of your trust,” Legolas promised him.
Between them, Ori turned to Bilbo, looking even more hurt and betrayed than when he’d realized the hobbit had tried to use him earlier. Kili shouted from joy, and putting away his sword, he immediately started joking with Tauriel, only to be soon joined by Bofur who couldn’t resist a chance for a laugh, be it with an elf. Nori didn’t look too happy of the new development (but Bilbo was getting used to his thief’s unhappiness, but as he disliked it), but Radagast didn’t seem to mind too much.
“As long as they’re not Noldors, we’ll be fine,” he muttered to himself. “It’s always Noldors who are a problem. Noldors and Numenoreans, that’s where all the trouble comes from. And Longbeards. Never listen to them, they are all mad.”
“We are Longbeards,” Nori pointed out.
“Oh, really? No one told me. That’s just like Gandalf! I don’t like to speak badly of people, but I’m starting to wonder if he really has all his head.”
Bilbo stared at the wizard who had a nest on his head, and he bit his lips not to laugh. But his eyes met Nori’s then, and before they could remember they had fallen out, they both started sniggering like children.
Bilbo really was glad that this escape attempt had failed, and for a second, he hoped that the next ones would too.
Chapter 6
Summary:
Bilbo's attempted escape is briefly discussed, and the fellowship (that still doesn't actually call itself that) enters Mirkwood.
Chapter Text
It proved difficult to go back to sleep after the elves’ arrival, and so Nori decided to take his turn at watch duty. Ori wasn’t too happy about it (he never was happy to have to sleep lately, and Nori would have to find a way to ask him about that without sounding like Dori), but in the end he obeyed.
Tauriel and Legolas settled across the fire and started whispering to each other. Nori listened to them, catching a word of sindarin here and there, trying to understand their conversation… it had been far too long since he’d spoken the queer language of elves, and he’d lost a lot of what little skill he’d ever had. Still, he could make out that their discussion was innocent enough. They were wondering about Bilbo’s sudden departure, but seemed to think he was just going home… and maybe it would be easier to let them believe that as long as possible. They probably didn’t know where hobbits lived, it would be easy.
He didn’t like having tall ones around, and even less so if they were Thranduil’s elves… But as Radagast had said, better that than Noldors. They were a mess, the few that still lingered in Middle Earth, and the fact that they had been the ones involved in this whole business with the rings of power didn’t improve Nori’s opinion of them. Anyone linked, however indirectly, to what was happening to Bilbo deserved nothing but his contempt.
“They seem nice enough,” Radagast said next to him, and Nori started. He hadn’t even heard the wizard sit with him next to the fire. “Are they friends of yours then?”
“They imprisoned us. But they also killed orcs to protect us, so I suppose it does make them friends of a sort.”
“Hm… well, I’ve heard of worse starts. And we’re going to need all the help we can get. Your brother is going to tell you in the morning, but our hobbit friend was trying to escape earlier.”
“What?”
“Well, that or he really just need to use body functions right after everyone appeared to have fallen asleep, and while insisting on being entirely alone, but I think an attempted escape is more likely. Then again, I’m no expert on hobbit customs.”
Nori cursed silently.
He should have known that Bilbo had agreed to their plan too easily, that he’d been too willing to help them destroy that blasted ring… He had hoped that maybe, his hobbit had been horrified by his own behaviour, that he’d wanted to be free of that accursed jewel… but it had all been an act, and Nori had fallen for it like a beginner.
“We’ll have to warn the others,” the dwarf whispered. “Bofur and Kili are too nice, they wouldn’t be careful enough otherwise. But better keep it from the elves for now. They’ve come here to be faithful to Bilbo, there’s no knowing if they won’t help him get away from us if they know that’s what he wants.”
“I’m not sure he wants it,” Radagast murmured back. “Even if he will certainly try again. But now we know and we can keep him safe, hm? I think that’s what he really wants anyway, to be kept safe.”
“How do you know?”
“Oh, because that’s what everyone wants, in front of something they can’t control. I’d like to be kept safe, quite frankly, but apparently that’s my job to do it for you now.”
Radagast smiled kindly as he said so, as if this was supposed to be uplifting somehow. It wasn’t. Being in the hands of an incompetent, scared wizard wasn’t uplifting. Gandalf hadn’t been the most competent of wizards either, but at least he’d always had the good taste of pretending he knew what it was doing, and really, that was all Nori asked of a wizard. He just needed to have at least one person near him who looked like they had everything under control. The reality of that control was optional, he just needed the illusion while he worked out how to really get everyone out of trouble...
And Radagast was denying him that last comfort.
Nori kept watch for the rest of that night, trying to figure out how to deal with everything. They would have to take turns, he decided in the end. One dwarf to watch over Bilbo, one to keep an eye on the elves, one to make sure Radagast didn’t wander off, and the last one to ensure they were going the right way.
The last one could never be Bofur, who had great stone sense, but had no sense of orientation aboveground. Kili couldn’t watch over the elves, because he had a debt to them, and was friend, if not more, with Tauriel. Nori himself wasn’t sure he could trust himself with keeping an eye on Bilbo (watching him was all he ever did, but all his instincts were wrong when the hobbit was concerned, because affections got in the way of his brain). Ori he trusted with any of this.
But Ori, apparently, didn’t trust himself with it.
Just as Radagast had predicted, the boy came to see Nori to tell him that during the night, Bilbo had tried to escape. He also asked if he was going to be sent back to Erebor.
“Why would we ever do that?” Nori asked.
“Because I’m the weak one,” Ori sighed sadly in answer. “Even Bilbo saw it, he didn’t try this with anyone else, he tried it with me, and that says everything, doesn’t it?”
“Did you let him go?”
“No, but…”
“Then you aren’t weak,” Nori cut him firmly. “He tried something stupid, and you didn’t allow it. You did great. We would have to be stupid to send you back. You are part of this company, an important part. If you want to go back, I’ll understand,” the thief said a little more softly, glancing at Kili. “But as long as you want to stay, you are staying. And even if you say you want to go back, I’ll try to convince you to stay. Okay?”
His eyes shining, Ori nodded, before throwing himself at his brother to hug him tight. It wasn’t often that the boy was that demonstrative, and Nori himself was rarely comfortable with such shows of affections… but he never pushed away his brother. And certainly not on that day.
“I’m proud of you,” he told Ori, because the boy could never hear it enough. "You have done great, and we'll need you to see this through, so I'm keeping you with us."
Having the elves with them changed their plans, of course. Until then, they had planned to go to around the forest and head East from there, but when they told so to Tauriel and Legolas, they advised against it. While a great number of orcs and goblins had perished in the battle at the feet of Erebor, many had managed to escape, and still lingered around the woods.
“If really you want to join Gondor,” Tauriel said, “It would be better to cross the forest and travel between Mirkwoods and the Misty Mountains. They will not dare to linger there, not with a skin-changer protecting the area… and there are villages on that side of the forest, they would give us a place to rest and hide. It would be much safer.”
“How could it be safer to cross the forest,” Ori mumbled, glaring at the ground between his feet, “when there are spiders in it. I know I’d rather go against orcs than against… these.”
There were murmurs of approval among the dwarves, and even Bilbo nodded firmly. With orcs you knew what to expect, they would just kill you and be done with it… if you were very unlucky, they might torture you a little before, if they were in a particularly nasty mood… though that was really more of a goblin’s thing, and even they didn’t do it quite as often as rumours claimed.
You knew what to expect from orcs.
Nori also knew what to expect from spiders now, and it was to be devoured alive or killed painfully and left to rot until they felt like eating him after all.
He’d take orcs over that any day.
“It’s easy enough to avoid the nests when you know where they are,” Tauriel protested, “and we do. They always come back to the same spots, and we will avoid these.”
“And if we get lost?” Kili asked.
“With two wood elves as our guides, we’re safe enough,” Radagast claimed cheerfully. “Oh, and there’s me too, of course. I know these woods. I do live in them, you know. Well, not in this part of them, but I have some experience travelling. We’ll be quite safe.”
Travelling with elves and a mad wizard in a forest that would be actively trying to kill them wasn’t Nori’s definition of safe, not by far, and it wasn’t the plan… but one thing he’d learned long ago about plans was that they were made to be changed as you went along. Beside the elves sounded like they knew what they were doing...
And Radagast seemed to trust them, so that was something.
The woods were every bit as awful as Nori remembered them, and very soon it wasn’t just Ori would had trouble sleeping at night. They elves seemed relaxed enough, chatting in their strange, liquid sounding tongue, and they were oblivious to their companion’s discomfort. They kept trying to talk to Bilbo, who smiled politely but rarely answered, too busy watching for any sign of a web. Kili was a little more talkative, but it was nothing compared to his usual self… (though to be fair, Nori hadn’t heard him blabber much since he had joined the company in Erebor. Being abandoned by his uncle seemed to have tempered somewhat his good moods). Even Bofur was silent… or at least, what could count as silent coming from him. He complained a fair bit about the cold and the food and the trees, but less than Nori would have expected. Ori tried to be sociable and amicable, but he was so constantly tired that he had trouble following a conversation.
It took them many days to travel through the forest, but it was much easier this time around, with guides who knew where they were going. Nori was just starting to think that things weren’t so bad…
But then, they stumbled upon webs.
It wasn’t much at first, just small ones, and they avoided them easily. The elves admitted that it was unexpected to see them in that part of that of the forest, but it was nothing worth worrying about. Legolas firmly ordered them to never touch the webs, since that was how the spiders found their preys. The order wasn’t too difficult to follow for the first couple days. But soon, no matter how many times they tried to change direction to escape the webs, they always stumbled upon more of them.
“Maybe we should have followed the road,” Bofur grumbled when one morning the webs forced them to turn back. “Wouldn’t that have been easier?”
“It would have required us to pass through my father’s kingdom,” Legolas explained. “Which might not have been the best of ideas right now. Tauriel disobeyed direct orders from my father after your escape, and I did not ask for permission to follow young master Baggins. He would have refused it if I asked, and neither of us wishes to follow his ”
“So what you’re saying is that you kids took us as an excuse to elope together, eh?” Bofur teased, before laughing at Legolas’s air of offended pride, quickly joined in that by the other dwarves. He laughed so hard, in fact, that he lost his footing and slipped, falling against a web.
Their laughters instantly died in their throats. Bofur sat where he was unmoving, until Radagast gave him his hand to help him back on his feet. Without a word, they all drew out their weapons, looking all around them for any sign of the spiders as they carefully walked away.
They thought they would soon be safe again, when all of a sudden Legolas let out a distressed cry.
“I fear we might have a problem. I see more webs ahead, and they block the path through which we took earlier. I fear there is only one way to go now.”
“And what’s that?” Bofur asked.
“Through the webs,” Tauriel announced. “But we need to choose where that will happen, and here is not ideal… Let’s turn around again, I noticed a spot where the webs seemed less thick.”
The dwarves groaned a bit against that, and even Ori’s forced smile disappeared for a moment.
“I thought the entire point of having elves with us was that we wouldn’t walk around in circle in the forest,” he mentioned dryly, glaring at Tauriel. “What good are you if we’re getting lost in spiders’ nests anyway?”
“Without us, you would likely have fallen into another nest, or met orcs while trying to get around the forest, master dwarf,” the elf replied with more politeness than Nori would have managed in her place. “We have managed to avoid many nests, and we will get you out of this one, fear not.”
“And will that settle your debt to Bilbo at last? Will you be going away after this?”
Nori mentally cursed, and wondered when was the last time his brother had slept, to be so openly aggressive toward the elf. Tauriel still had a polite smile on her face, but it was wavering as she seemed to realize that Ori’s question wasn’t just a joke. Far less patient than her, Legolas took a step in their direction, frowning as he probably prepared to explain why such low creatures as dwarves had to right to question the intention of elves.
He didn’t have the time, though, because Bilbo quickly slipped next to Ori, putting an arm around his shoulder in a gesture too friendly to be entirely true.
“Now my boy, I’m sure we’re all very worried about our new friends leaving us,” the hobbit exclaimed with a too large smile. “But I’m sure we can count on them at the very least until we are out of the forest.”
“We were thinking on staying with you until the end of your travel,” Tauriel claimed, something in her tone indicating that she wasn’t sure that would be welcome after all. “As we said earlier, we are neither of us too eager to return to our king, and we do not mind staying with you… as long as you will have us.”
“And we are very glad to have you indeed,” Bilbo assured her with a firm nod. “All of us. Aren’t we glad to have our elvish friends, Ori?”
“Thrilled,” the young scribe grumbled, which earned him an elbow in the ribs from Bilbo. “I mean, I’m really happy and thankful to you and your prince are our… friends. Sorry if I made it sound otherwise, I get cranky when I don’t sleep enough. Beside,” he added, suddenly smiling a little too nicely, “your keen eyes might be more than needed to make sure nothing happens to our poor Bilbo, and that he doesn’t just disappear.”
Nori almost groaned. That boy really needed to sleep, if he was getting as cranky and aggressive as… well, as Nori himself, the thief thought. But then again, for Bilbo to make Ori call the elves his friends… it wasn’t as though the hobbit didn’t know why the boy wasn’t too happy of their company…And after Bilbo’s attempted escape, he should have known better than to wound Ori’s pride yet again.
Sensing the sudden tension in the group, Tauriel gave up on her smile and stared at them as if the were strange creatures whose behaviours she couldn’t make sense of. She’d probably have to ask Kili what it was she had missed in the conversation, and with some luck the prince would remember there were things he wasn’t supposed to tell her. But for now, ever mindful of not upsetting their delicate dwarvish tempers (if things had been different, Nori would have laughed at how careful she was with them, just as bad as Bilbo had been at first) Tauriel stepped back, prepared to let them deal with things on their own.
Legolas on the other hand seemed oblivious to it all, and he stepped closer to promise once more that he would protect Bilbo with his life if need be.
“You really are a tad dramatic you know,” Bofur laughed, slapping the elven prince on the back… and he slapped a little harder than either of them had expected apparently, causing the prince to sleep on the dead leaves that covered the forest’s ground.
The tall prince tried to catch himself on a nearby tree, but instead of a branch, his hand slapped loudly against a strand of web. That alone would have been bad enough, but the spider silk was sticking to the prince’s hand, and moved with him when he tried to pull away. Tauriel had to come help him untangle himself. By the time Legolas was free, the entire webs around them were vibrating so much that if there were any spiders around, they simply couldn’t have missed their presence.
“We cannot stay here,” Radagast decided, “the tree are too close, they’d have the advantage… we better try to reach again that little clearing we passed earlier. But walk slowly, and look up, all of you. They will try to catch us by surprise, and they can be rather cunning.”
Without a word, all four dwarves moved close to Bilbo. The hobbit didn’t protest, and in turn stepped closer to Nori, just a little. Not enough for anyone else to notice, but it had the thief wonder if this was a remnant of the trust they’d shared, back when Nori knew how to protect his hobbit, or if having failed to escape Ori’s watchfulness, Bilbo was making new plans to escape.
He chose to pretend it might be the first, but decided to watch out in case it was the second.
They had almost reached the clearing when the spiders came. Tauriel saw them first, and in a matter of seconds, one of the beast had fallen to the ground, the elf’s arrow gone deep through one of its eyes. She also killed the second one, but the third was felled by Nori and Bilbo together, the fourth by Ori and Kili, and the fifth by Bofur. After that, Nori stopped counting, far too busy fighting off the creatures and trying not to remember how things had ended last time. There seemed to be less spiders, and they weren’t as big… but there were also less of them against the creatures, so the advantage wasn’t on their side.
Not until Radagast did something with that great staff of his, and a flash of light had five spiders fall dead around them, and sent the others away.
So maybe he wasn’t entirely useless, Nori decided. Suddenly, he rather felt in a mood to forgive him his fashion sense and the thing with the birds under his hat.
“Is anyone too wounded to move?” the wizard asked, and perhaps for the first time since Nori had met him, he sounded as great and fearsome as Gandalf did sometimes. “They got scared, but they will come back, and we must get away from their nest as soon as possible. They only attacked because they thought we had come to destroy the nest and their eggs, they will leave us alone.”
“How do you…” Legolas started.
“I speak many languages, master elf, and not all of them belong to people walking on two feet. Now, if you can walk, I suggest that you do. Or better yet, run. If elves are as light on their feet as I’ve heard it, now is the time to prove it, my boy.”
The elven prince looked about to protest, but the wizard grabbed his shoulders and started pushing him ahead as if he were a stubborn child. It made for a fun picture, one that Nori knew his little brother would have to draw later on (it’d be a success as a print: elven prince shoved by a mad wizard. Everyone would want it in their bedroom, to bring good dreams). It didn’t last long though: soon the elf tried to restore his dignity by proving he could walk perfectly well on his own, but they all smiled at the memory for many hours.
In the end, they managed to escape the nest without seeing anymore spiders, though Nori fancied he almost heard them once or twice. The noises stopped once they left the webs behind though, meaning that Radagast might have been right about them. They kept walking for a couple hours anyway, before night started falling and the wizard decided they could stop and rest.
Tauriel immediately started gathering wood for a fire, but Nori decided that dinner wasn’t as urgent as checking whether anyone was wounded. Himself had a few nasty scratches, but he’d survived worse, and things would be fine if he kept them clean. Bilbo had suffered no harm (bless the maker), and neither had most of the others, but it turned out that Legolas had been nastily bitten, and Bofur had sprained his ankle a little. It was nothing too serious, especially with the horror of the battle of the five armies still so fresh, but it was still bad.
“What we would need,” Radagast decided, sharing a piece of bread with his birds, “is a nice, safe place to rest a few days, heal, and wait for the snow to stop for a while.”
“What snow?” Kili asked.
The wizard stared at him as if the young prince were asking a very silly question. He then looked around him, and frowned.
“Oh, right, it’s not started yet, that’s for this night. Well, it gives us a little more time to find shelter! Do you know, I have a friend not far from here, I think… a merry young lad, very friendly… not terribly fond of dwarves, but he’ll easily make an exception if I introduce you, and…”
“You’re taking us to Beorn?”
“Oh, you know him?” Radagast exclaimed, managing to sound delighted and disappointed all at once. “Oh, well, that’s good, it makes it all easier. He likes company in winter, so I’m fairly sure he won’t mind us for a few days. A very nice fellow, very nice. Makes very good honey. We should be out of the forest tomorrow, and then it’s a few days away… Easy.”
Nori wasn’t sure how he felt about that. Beorn had made it clear last time that he didn’t like them, and in that dreadful battle, he’d only come long enough to rip Bolg’s head off of his body and then he’d disappeared again…
But his house had been a nice place, and they had all enjoyed their stay there. And after all that had happened, they would need a safe place, not just to heal, but because it had been so long since they’d had time to relax… the last time had already been at Beorn’s, come to think of it.
Maybe if they went back, Bilbo would smile again, as he’d done so often there (but he wouldn’t invite Nori to follow him behind that great tree while everyone was busy, not this time).
Maybe if they went back, Ori would sleep again (and if he slept, he might see that Kili was fighting to not be so protective anymore, even if it was hard for him… and if he saw that, maybe Ori too would smile again).
Maybe if they went back, Bofur would start joking for fun again (instead of joking to try and distract them from everything that could go wrong, as he was doing now, describing Beorn’s bees to Legolas to scare him).
“I think it’s not a bad idea,” Nori told Radagast. “Especially if it’s going to snow.”
“Then it’s decided,” the wizard exclaimed cheerfully. “Let’s go see the old bear!”
Chapter 7
Summary:
a chapter in which there is snow, and Beorn.
Notes:
I wasn't going to write today
But then I was forced to do a research for work on the "destruction of traditional family" because of things such as non-heterosexual marriage, the fact that abortion recently became (supposedly) easier in France, and
I needed something happy or I'd have murdered people
so here we go uwu
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
It was rather annoying to wake up and see that just as Radagast had promised, it had snowed during the night. Bilbo was not overly fond of snow. For one thing, it was cold, something he didn’t particularly enjoy when he was sleeping outside. For another thing, it always reminded him of the Fell Winter, and that was worse than the cold itself.
He hoped there weren’t wolves in the area.
Trying to cheer himself up, Bilbo thought that at least, they were almost out of the forest now, and that was good. It was also a rather huge step toward Gondor, and finding out if his little ring really was as bad as everyone seemed to think, which was less good. But that would come later, much later, and for now he tried to focus on the idea that they were going to see Beorn again. It was a pleasant thought, almost as pleasant as if he’d been told that they were going back to Rivendell. Beorn had been a strange fellow, but his house had been comfortable and safe, and Bilbo would be glad to see it again, and eat once more of these delicious honey cakes the tall man made.
That thought had his stomach grumbling loudly, reminding him that imagination was all very well, but he needed to have a breakfast that was more than thoughts and memories. So he reluctantly left his bedroll, and trying not to cringe too much at the cold wetness under his feet, he went to join the others. Kili and the elves were sitting together, the only ones up yet (Nori wasn’t on his bedroll, but he also wasn’t anywhere to be seen), and that was a surprise. The dwarf prince wasn’t exactly a morning person usually… and it had been a long while since he’d seemed so relaxed too, playing with the fresh snow and making small balls that the hobbit knew would be used against them all day.
“You’d better not aim for Radagast’s hat,” Bilbo warned him, sitting with them. “I don’t think he’ll be too happy if you bother his birds.”
“Does it mean that everyone else, including you, is fair game then?” Kili asked with a smile that was far too happy for that hour of the day.
“If you bother me, I will unleash my elven warriors against you,” the hobbit announced with a chuckle. “I also wouldn’t advise attacking Nori, he has little humour these days… and if you are wise, you will leave Ori alone too.”
That last comment had the boy grimacing, and that was strange too, considering how he usually flinched and looked either hurt or furious at the first mention of his friend.
“We all know I’m not too good at being wise,” Kili sighed dramatically, shifting slightly to be ready to run. “But I will keep that in mind. And since I can’t attack Tauriel either, on account of her being far too fearsome a fighter…” the elf laughed, and bowed slightly “... then it only leaves me with Bofur and… Legolas!”
At hearing his name called, the elf prince turned, right in time for a snowball to hit his nose. For a second, Bilbo worried that the elf would get angry. But as soon as the first shock was over, Legolas started gathering snow, and Kili had to quickly grab his munitions and run for cover to avoid being hit back. He was laughing loudly as he did so, and the two elves were just as merry, their problems of the previous day entirely forgotten. Before long, the noise awoke Bofur and Ori. The first quickly joined the fight, teaming up with Kili (who would later betray him, as there had been a secret alliance between Tauriel and him), while the second sat by Bilbo and nibbled on a thick slice of cheese.
“Everyone seems in an awful good mood this morning,” Ori noted. “It’s nice. Where is Nori?”
“No idea, he was already gone when I woke up. You’ll have to ask our great warriors, or wait until he comes back.”
“There’s no emergency, I was just wondering where he’d gone…”
“He’s gone to check if the spiders really didn’t follow us!” Kili shouted, running their way while the elves were distracted by Bofur. Once he was close enough, the prince let himself fall behind Ori and Bilbo, hiding from the others. “He should be back soon,” he resumed, pressing against Ori’s back to have a quick look at the fight. “And with the noise we’re making, even if he got lost he’ll find us again.”
“Nori never gets lost,” Ori protested. “He must just have been hiding somewhere until he could hope for some decent company.”
“Are you calling me bad company?”
“I might be.”
Bilbo braced himself for an argument… and none came. Kili just sniggered, before pouncing on Legolas just as he was walking toward them, probably hoping to catch a break. It was strange that the boys had managed to exchange words without ending up fighting, and Bilbo opened his mouth to ask if they had made up… then decided against it. If they were trying to be civil at each other, better not call it to attention. He remembered his days as a tween, and seeing friends refusing to court someone they liked just because they didn’t want to hear “I told you you loved them” from their parents. He liked the children too much to do that to them.
“Do you think I should apologize to Tauriel about yesterday?” Ori wondered, biting distractedly in his slice of cheese. “I wasn’t too nice to her, was I?”
“No, you weren’t. But you had reason enough, I suppose.”
“Yes. I was sleepy.”
“And what’s changed this morning?”
Ori shrugged, staring at the princes fighting in the snow. “I slept.”
Bilbo hesitated, because that was a cryptic answer if he’d ever heard one… but he decided not to insist. Ori looked better than he had in weeks, who cared about the reason behind? He had a right to his secrets.
Just as Kili had claimed, Nori came back soon after. Instantly the fighting stopped, and they all gathered to wait for instructions. Bilbo wasn’t sure if they all realized that they were doing it, that they were treating Nori as the chief of their little expedition, even though they had two princes and a wizard who might have pretended to that title… He knew for sure that Nori didn’t see it. But that was because Nori only thought of himself as a thief, and never saw any of the many other things that he was.
There had been a time when Bilbo would have teased him for this. Nori didn’t get uncomfortable easily, but he always blushed and tried to laugh it off when the hobbit dared to imply he was a good dwarf… but it was something they had lost.
Watching Nori plan the next few days with Tauriel and Radagast, Bilbo found that he missed him terribly. If there had been a way… any way to have both Nori and the ring, he would have taken it. Except there was a way, a dark corner of his mind told him. If truly his ring was so powerful… if it was a ring of power, Sauron’s very own… he could make Nori stay by his side, he could make Nori trust him again, he could make Nori love him again… It wouldn’t be the same as before, but it’d be close enough.
By early afternoon, they were out of the forest, and it felt as if someone had removed a great stone from Bilbo’s chest. He minded the snow a little less now that he was no longer surrounded by trees. His toes were still rather cold, and it would be a few days before they reached Beorn’s house, but at least they were no longer in Mirkwood, and he was no longer fighting a constant urge to put on his ring and disappear. Just seeing the horizon again, even if the horizon was cut into the sharp shapes of the misty mountains, was a relief. Bilbo let out a breath he’d been holding for days, it felt.
Judging by how easily Kili joked with Bofur, and how much the miner started talking again, Bilbo hadn’t been the only one to suffer from being under the trees.
Their first few days of travel happened without any incident. The only thing worthy of note was that by the look of it, Ori had found a way to sleep again. But since none of the dwarves were commenting on it, neither did Bilbo. If Bofur could keep his mouth shut, then certainly so could Bilbo (he liked Bofur, he really did, but he was the sort of person who would have managed to prevent even dear little Lobelia from talking, and considering how chatty the girl was, it was quite the accomplishment).
Then, on the dawn of the third day, they met Beorn. He had come to them with ponies and horses, and there was something so casual about the way Radagast greeted him that it made Bilbo feel very suspicious. It rather felt as if the whole thing had been planned somehow, especially considering the fact that Beorn had brought just enough mounts to carry them and their luggage.
But since Beorn also brought some of his delicious honey cakes, Bilbo wasn’t about to complain if it turned out that Radagast was a little more crafty than he looked.
The rest of the trip toward Beorn’s house was a lot happier, and a lot faster. The elves were rather curious about the tall man, asking him all sorts of questions, and he answered with a surprising good humour. He was smiling a lot more easily than when the company had first met him, and it puzzled Bilbo. Thorin too had seemed more relaxed after the battle, as if Azog’s death had taken a weight off of his chest… maybe it was the same for Beorn. Bilbo wasn’t sure he liked that idea. Such active revenge went against everything he’d ever been taught.
But considering how relaxed Beorn seemed, maybe there was some good in that method too. Bilbo had tried for years to fight back gossips and rumors by being the most polite and proper hobbit that had ever been, but it hadn’t worked too well. Maybe he too should have been more active about it…
As soon as he had that thought, his mind was flooded by pictures of all the terrible things he could have done, the things he could, would do once he got back home. He could rise above all of them and rule them, force them to see him as he was, silence anyone who dared to criticize him and never have to hide again… but as soon as the idea rose, he pushed it away. This wasn’t who he was, and just because people hadn’t always been kind to him, just because they had dislike the adventureness of his tweens and the fact he’d never had wanted a wife and children, he couldn’t go thinking like that.
If he did, he’d be no better than they were.
Still, the dark thought had been planted in his mind, and he had to fight it the entire way to Beorn’s house.
That house was everything Bilbo remembered, and more. There was a sense of safety there that had everyone relaxed. Even Bilbo himself felt less worried about that strange quest of theirs, and part of him didn’t care so much that the ring might have to be destroyed. He felt safe, surrounded by friends, and for the first time in ages, he didn’t feel the need to hide anymore. He even managed to joke a little with Nori at dinner that night, like in the old days. The dwarf seemed surprised at first, and Bilbo almost withdrew… but then Bofur said something silly, and the hobbit had to shut him, just as Nori tried to do the same. They laughed together, for the first time since Laketown, and it was the very best feeling in the world.
Once they had eaten and drunk more than they should have, everyone started going to bed. Even the elves had trouble dealing with Beorn’s delicious mead, and decided to go lie down for a bit (after Kili and Bofur, but before Nori and Ori)(Bilbo felt oddly proud of his dwarf). The hobbit tried to join everyone else on the straw beds prepared for them, but Radagast stopped him.
“Just a word? There, there, come sit next to the fire… better enjoy the warmth while it last, hm? I Don’t know what Gandalf thought, making us travel in winter like that… He’s a good boy, but he just has no practical sense.”
Dropping on a piece of wood near the fire, Bilbo giggled at the disapproval in the wizard’s voice.
“You sound like my mother when she talked about her little brother,” he told Radagast, too delightfully tipsy to worry that maybe wizards didn’t want to be compared to hobbits. Thankfully, the old man didn’t seem offended.
“Well, I suppose I feel a responsibility toward him,” Radagast admitted. “I have been on Middle-Earth longer than him, by a few years. And he is so reckless at times.”
“You really do sound like my mother.”
“Oh. Is that a bad thing?”
Bilbo shook his head. “No, I think it’s pretty good. She was an amazing woman. Very brave, very caring, very clever.”
“Oh. Good then,” Radagast replied, with a pleased smile. “I know that Men sometimes use woman as an insult, I was wondering if it were the same with hobbits.”
“Well, some would,” Bilbo admitted. “It’s insulting to call a boy a lass… but the opposite is quite as true. Hobbits as a rule firmly believe that everything and everyone has its proper place, and that it’s quite ridiculous to want to… escape from it. Not that anyone would want to anyway. Things… are the way they are for a reason.”
Bilbo found himself shifting uncomfortably, the memories of the Shire seeping in through the pleasant fog of the mead. Without realizing it, he slipped one hand in his coat’s pocket, his fingers curling possessively around his ring, and he relaxed. Everything had its proper place, but it mattered little that he didn’t, not as long as no one could see him.
“Relax, little bunny,” Beorn said, with a light tap to Bilbo’s back that was almost enough to throw him off of his seat. “No one here is trying to hurt you.”
“I am not a bun.. a rabbit!”
The tall man laughed loudly, baring his teeth in a smile that certainly made him look rather like a bear.
“You are, and it is not a bad things. Bunnies are good creatures, they enjoy what is nice in life… but when they are scared they run to hide, like you seem to do.”
Bilbo fingers tightened on the ring. He knew what bears did to rabbits, and it occurred to him suddenly that if Beorn tried to harm him, he would not be able to defend himself. He would have to count on others to rescue him. He did not like that idea.
But then, Beorn laughed again, and ruffled his hair with one enormous hand.
“Peace, little rabbit! I have told you, no one here means you any harm. We are all your friends.”
“You’re pretty quick to call yourself my friend,” the hobbit retorted, playing with the ring in his pocket and glancing toward the door. He could feel Radagast eyes on him, but he tried to ignore it. It only made him run away more. “What have you done to deserve the name?”
The huge man smiled, but didn’t laugh this time.
“I have helped you and your other friends, twice now,” Beorn reminded him. “And you too helped, in offering me a chance for revenge. I have drunk with you, shared my food with you, listened to your tales and laughed at your jokes all evening. I do not know how things are for your kind, but for mine this is all it takes to make a friend.”
Bilbo’s grip on his ring tightened, the memories of others who had had called themselves his friends too easily flooding his brain… but then his fingers relaxed, and the ring fell at the bottom of his pocket.
Beorn had no reason to be pretending. He was clearly a man happy of his condition, except for the fact that he must miss having company. He had no interest in Bilbo’s good name, in his parent’s money and lands. Bilbo had nothing that Beorn could want. Nothing but the stories and jokes he knew, and his company.
“I suppose for hobbits too it is enough,” he said. “Or maybe it’s not. But dwarves seem to work that way too, and I’ve spent far too much time around them lately, and I rather enjoy their way of doing things.”
Beorn laughed again, louder than before, and Bilbo almost feared he would wake up the others.
“There’s not many who would dare to compare me to a dwarf, little bunny! I’ve told you before, I’m not too fond of them… though I suppose your lot isn’t as bad as some others. You have trained them well.”
“I cannot take credit for this,” Bilbo replied with a small smile. “Maybe it is just that you’d met the wrong ones, before. You can’t judge everyone on the actions of a few people.”
The tall man grinned at him, and nodded.
“You are a wise little bunny, and maybe you are right. If I can call you friend, my brave little bunny, then maybe I can try to do the same with some dwarves.”
“Yes, yes indeed,” Radagast exclaimed, surprising them both. They had almost forgotten he was there too, he had been so quiet. “I have always told you, it’s important to find people to trust. It’s not easy, but trust is important. And friends. Friends are quite nice, aren’t they? I like having friends.”
As if to make a point, the wizard removed his hat to scratch the back of the birds nesting on his head. One of the birds was asleep and didn’t notice, but the other chirped happily.
“Yes, yes, friends are good,” Radagast decided, putting his hat back on. “It’s always so nice to have people you can count on.”
“Well, I wouldn’t count on you right now,” Beorn laughed. “By the sound of it, you’ve had too much to drink for someone who’s only used to water. And our little bunny seems quite tired too. We will have to continue this conversation in the morning, or in the days to come. Now go rest, the both of you. It has been a long day, and rest will do you good.”
They all rose to go to bed, but Bilbo wasn’t so sure that Radagast was drunk. It seemed to the hobbit that, for someone who had insisted on staying up to talk, the wizard had said very little… and yet, Bilbo felt better for that conversation. If he couldn’t suspect Beorn of faking friendship with him out of interest, then it meant it was quite as silly to accuse the dwarves of the same. The only thing they might have wanted that he had was the ring, but everything about them made it clear they only feared it… and the elves just didn’t know about it.
Which meant that any demonstration of friendship on all their ends had to be just that. Friendship and affection.
As he closed his eyes and started falling asleep, Bilbo resolved to do two things in the morning. First of all, he would apologize to Nori for everything that had happened in Laketown and since then. Because Nori was his friend, and more than a friend, and it had hurt far too much to have lost that. The dark voice in his mind had suggested more than once that he could try to use the ring to force Nori to be close to him again, but an apology really was a far better option.
And then, if they managed to make it up, he would ask Nori if he was aware that Ori and Kili had fallen asleep in each other’s arms.
Notes:
mini rant: I am still super disappointed with movie!Beorn because whyyyyy did they have to make him all dark and angsty when in the books, he was that genuinely happy person who did his stuff in happiness, no matter if "his stuff" was take care of his animals or kill goblins mercilessly.
So.
Have a laughing Beorn who is happy and calls Bilbo a bunny.
I'll be over here, pretending that this is also the film canon and that the dwarves just caught him on a bad day.
Chapter 8
Summary:
In which excuses are made, and everyone gets to relax a bit
Notes:
(See the end of the chapter for notes.)
Chapter Text
It was the first time in days that Nori wasn’t the first to wake up.
It was also the first time in a long, long time that he woke up with a hangover, and he hadn’t particularly missed the feeling. He thought he’d been careful, but Beorn’s mead was nasty, far too sweet for something that strong… and these damn cakes had made him so thirsty , which hadn’t helped at all.
By the time Nori managed to drag himself to the table, everyone else was already up and chatting. Legolas seemed as hungover as him, and Bofur looked like he was trying to drown himself in a mug of milk… but even like that, everything felt relaxed and happy. It had been a good idea to come at Beorn’s again...
Or so he thought, until he noticed that Bilbo was nowhere to be seen.
His headache forgotten, Nori jumped to his feet and strided toward the table, grabbing Ori by the sleeve because he seemed to be the less affected by the side effects of mead.
“Where’s Bilbo?” he growled, and his own voice sounded far too loud for his tastes. It didn’t help to notice Ori’s little smile. Boy was no better than Dori in the mornings.
“Bilbo’s gone out to have a look at the beehive,” Ori innocently announced. “He said he hadn’t dared last time, but since it’s winter and the bees are mostly asleep, he decided to risk it.”
Nori glared at his brother, and the only thing that prevented him from shouting at him was the fear he’d really end up with a headache.
“ Are you telling me he’s outside alone ?” Nori hissed. “Ori, we had all agreed to keep an eye on him, he tried to escape right in front of your nose, and now you’ll letting go out alone?”
“ I never said he was alone!”Ori protested. “He’s got two of Beorn’s dogs with him, and I made sure to tell them right in front of him that they can’t lose sight of him for just one moment. Even if he uses his ring, they can smell him, you know.”
Nori took a deep breath, and decided that his next move would be to drink a tall mug of something non alcoholic. Milk wasn’t what he liked best, but anything that would help his brain work again was welcome, or else he’d spend the entire day snapping at people. After all the work he’d done to make sure Ori knew he was useful to their little group, he couldn’t start treating him like an idiot now.
“Sorry about that. Should have known you wouldn’t just leave him alone. I’m…”
“ Quite hungover, yeah,” Ori cut him with a small, sympathetic smile. “I’d noticed, and I’m not angry. You should try to eat something though, I remember hearing that it could help.”
“I will,” Nori answered, keeping his face a blank mask. “You seem in a good mood today.”
The boy shrugged, a tad too nonchalantly.
“Do I? I guess that’s what sleeping somewhere safe does to you. And the food’s nice.”
“Your mood started improving before we got here though,” Nori said, carefully, because if Ori realized that anyone had realized what was happening with Kili, he might decide to push the prince away once more. And while Nori had more than agreed with their separation when it had occurred, right now even an orc would have seen how much the kids wanted to be together.
“I guess after Mirkwood, anything’s an improvement,” Ori replied, and his brother decided to drop the matter. The boy would talk when he’d feel like talking… or when he’d need advice.
As soon as Nori felt better (praise the Maker for Beorn’s food, and even his milk tasted good, somehow) he headed outside. Not because he thought that their host’s dogs weren’t capable of keeping watch over Bilbo, he told himself, but just to make sure the hobbit wasn’t about to catch a cold. Such things happened to short lived races when they went around walking in the snow without boots. They just couldn’t afford that sort of things, not with the long road awaiting them before they could reach Gondor.
Thankfully, when he found Bilbo, the hobbit didn’t look as if he were about to get sick. He was, in fact, smiling, and talking to the two dogs who sat on each side of him. He was rambling about bees, and honeys, and whether he might get some seeds from Beorn because Shire honey would benefit greatly from the stronger hints that flowers on this side of the mountain seemed to have. He didn’t seemed to care that the dogs couldn’t really answer (even if they did bark sometimes right after he’d asked a question), happy to just chat about something he enjoyed.
It took a while for Nori to realize why his stomach was twisting painfully at this scene, but it eventually hit him. Bilbo looked happy , almost as much as he’d been in Rivendell, or during their previous stay with the skinchanger… and when he noticed Nori’s presence at last, the smile on his face seemed as sincere as those before Laketown.
Maybe there really was something relaxing about this place. If so, Nori didn’t feel its effects just yet.
“Hello there!” Bilbo greeted him. “Have you seen these beehives? I think that I’ve seen houses smaller than that in the Shire.”
“Hm… not yours though,” Nori retorted. “Mister I-own-a-hill.”
“If Thorin can own a mountain, I don’t see why I shouldn’t own a hill,” Bilbo laughed, and Nori’s stomach twisted again.
It was too much like before Laketown, when they could joke and laugh and tease each other. Nori almost felt as if he could walk toward the hobbit to kiss him… and Bilbo would protest of course, because it wasn’t proper to be kissing in public, and them two men… he’d laugh about it being scandalous , but he’d kiss back anyway with an enthusiasm that always pleasantly surprised Nori. Bilbo kissed as if he might die the second after, as if it were the last time and he’d never get another chance for it…
And indeed, they’d had their last time now. No matter what Bilbo’s smile and relaxed manners seemed to say, the two dogs as his sides where a reminder of their true situation. Bilbo wasn’t there by choice, and he’d proved already that he didn’t want to stay with them. Until that blasted ring was gone, everything the hobbit said, everything he did might be a lie.
“Aren’t you cold?” Nori asked dryly, glancing at Bilbo’s feet.
“Not terribly. I’ve been worse, and I’m tough enough, in case you hadn’t noticed. Beside, the cold helps me think.”
“And what do you need to think about?”
Bilbo shrugged and looked at one of the dogs, scratching it behind the ears.
“Many things. You, mostly.”
“Me?”
The hobbit looked up at Nori and nodded firmly, looking as determined as he had in his bravest moments. Before he could stop himself, Nori took a step toward him, but he managed to not get closer than that.
“Why would you be thinking about me?”
“ Because I’ve been awful and terrible to you, of course,” Bilbo said, perfectly still except for his toes wiggling. They always did that when he was embarrassed. It used to make Nori smile. Not this time. “I’ve never apologized about Laketown, have I?” the hobbit sighed. “Well, I should have, and I will now. I am sorry that I… that I attacked you and accused you of trying to steal from me. I know you’d never do that. Well, you might do it for a joke, but I… I trust you to never really steal from me.”
Nori didn’t answer, too surprised by the sudden declaration. For a brief second, he considered again grabbing Bilbo and kissing him, because if he was capable of an apology then there was hope… but that idea didn’t last, almost immediately replaced by a suspicions that this might be part of another plan to escape. He couldn’t let his feelings get in the way, not when he had promised to protect Bilbo from himself, at any cost.
“You weren’t yourself,” he answered. “I understand.”
“What I did was unforgivable,” Bilbo resumed, but Nori immediately cut him.
“I said you weren’t yourself. There is nothing to forgive.”
Bilbo crossed his arms, and glared at Nori as if he had said something particularly impolite, or doubted the general usefulness of handkerchiefs.
“I hurt you, with words and with a blade!” the hobbit reminded him. “I don’t know how it is for dwarves, but for a hobbit it’s not acceptable behaviour, and I have to redeem myself. Because I’m a Baggins, and a Took, and I have always prided myself in being a decent enough person. Beside, I am an adult, and I need to face the consequences of my actions.”
Nori almost smiled at the hobbit’s firm little nod when he finished talking.
“That sounded rather rehearsed,” he pointed out, not wanting to deal just yet with what Bilbo had said. The hobbit glared at him, and one of the dogs made a sound that was eerily similar to a short laugh.
“It was,” he confessed. “I told you the cold helped me think, and it might have been a little awkward to prepare that speech with Ori sitting next to me.”
“It’s not like he doesn’t know about… things.”
Bilbo blushed and shrugged, while Nori cursed himself. He was not in a state to have any sort of a conversation about the little extras that their friendship used to have. It something that couldn’t be discussed while dealing with a hangover. At best, it was something that might be discussed while acquiring a hangover, maybe. After his sixth mug of mead the night before, Nori had been very tempted to grab Bilbo, kiss him, and ask him where they stood now, and if things would ever be right again between them.
He was forever thankful that Bofur had claimed then that he might get sick on his boots, thus saving him from that embarrassment.
As it appeared, Bilbo wasn’t too anxious to talk about that yet. He blushed, and coughed, and then grunted, “Well, I’m sorry, but it’s just not done among hobbits. He’s your younger brother, I cannot talk near him of such things. I don’t care if things are different among dwarves, it’s just not done. Beside, I’m rehearsing a speech to him too. I owe him an apology for the night we met the elves. And I know you know what I mean. Don’t think I haven’t noticed I’m under constant surveillance since then. Even now…”
He gestured at the dog, who managed to look somewhat embarrassed, but still kept their eyes on him.
“It’s for your…”
“Yes, yes, it’s for my safety. I know that. I think in a way, I’m glad things are like that. I might have tried again otherwise, and that would be no good. I… I don’t want to lose the ring, but I’m starting to think I also want to get rid of it. I love what it has given me, this courage… but I hate that it’s starting to take away… everything else.”
“ We’ll help you deal with that piece of shit,” Nori promised, crossing what little space was still between them to put his hand on Bilbo’s shoulder. It earned him a sad smile, but a smile nonetheless. “We’re in this together. You, me, Ori, Kili, Bofur… even the bloody elves. We’re in this with you, and we won’t let that ring change you more than it already did. You’re our friend, our comrade, you’re like kin… and dwarves don’t let kin down. We’re in this with you, until the end.”
Bilbo made a noise that was suspiciously like a squeak, and threw himself into Nori’s arms. The dwarf had no choice but to hold him, which he did, keeping his hobbit close to him, as if he never intended to let go again. They stayed like that for a while, until they heard Bofur's voice calling them for lunch and threatening to eat everything if they didn't hurry. Bilbo's instinct immediately kicked in, and he shouted back that if there was nothing else left he would eat Bofur. He ran back inside then, Beorn's dogs running on each side of him, Nori following them more slowly, a smile on his lips.
In the end, they stayed several weeks at Beorn’s. It angered Nori at first, because they were supposed to reach Gondor as fast as possible to meet Gandalf and finally know what sort of a ring Bilbo had. Beorn only laughed when Nori tried to say they needed to leave after only three days. The tall man made a show of explaining all the ways they would die before so much as leaving the borders of his lands, and Nori was forced to agree to stay.
It was a good thing, really. After their last few months, they needed the rest. Their last periods of inactivity had been in Mirkwood’s cells, and before the battle at the foot of Erebor, if that even counted. In any case, neither time had been particularly restful.
But Beorn took good care of them, feeding them, sharing stories with them and listening to theirs. After only three weeks, they were all in a better shape, well fed and relaxed. Even the elves seemed better, and Nori was sure that Legolas had put on a few pounds, eating only honey and cream.
Not that everything was always right, of course. Some days, being all trapped together in the house got on their nerves, and there were a few arguments. They were always minor ones, except for one great dispute between Ori and Kili that resulted in them sleeping separately for a few days… but even that didn’t last, and when they reconciled, having never said what their fight was about, they seemed closer than they had been even before their break up.
“We talked about a few things,” Ori explained when Nori asked about it. “We talked about trust, mostly. But before you get any ideas in your head, we’re not back together. We’ve agreed to just be friends now. It’s… it’s better for everyone. Love isn’t any good anyway.”
Nori assured his brother he understood. And when Bofur asked him if he was now allowed to point out the kids’ behaviour he forbid it, but they both agreed that the children were ridiculously in love. No one held a friend the way Kili held Ori when they all sat around the fire to share stories, and the way Ori was huddled against the prince wasn’t exactly friendly either.
Sometimes, Nori envied them. Bilbo and him were back to calling each other friends and they sometimes laughed together, but they hadn’t mended things the way the children had. Not yet. If nothing else, Nori was starting to hope that things might be better once the ring would be destroyed.
After more than three months, Beorn decided at last that the snows wouldn’t be as nasty, and that they were strong enough to face what was left of winter.
“ February can be dangerous in these parts,” he claimed, “but this year it will be warm enough, and I think you have nothing to fear. I will give you food and warm clothes, and lend you ponies. They will take you to the border of Rohan, and then you must send them back. You I trust, you treated them well enough when we last met, but I am not so sure about the riders. It is said that they love horses the way most others love gold, and I do not want an animal of mine on their land. I would ask that you send them back when you pass near the woods of Lorien, for security, but I leave that decision to you.”
Radagast grunted. “Oh, I had forgotten we’d be travelling near Lothlorien. Now that is a bit of a bother… I wonder if we shouldn’t cross the Anduin, just to be on the safe side.”
“There is nothing unsafe in Lorien!” Legolas protested, though Tauriel rolled her eyes and grimaced. “Its Lady is a fair ruler, and…”
“ Yes, yes, the old girl certainly is fair , as Gandalf could tell you” Radagast cut him. “Still, she is a Noldor, and I don’t like them so much, so I’d rather avoid her.”
“It is not wise to cross the Anduin,” Beorn warned him. “The orcs thrive on the other bank, and there are many who did not take part in the great battle.”
Radagast didn’t seem entirely convinced, as if the possibility of fighting orcs were less distasteful to him than meeting a few elves. Nori liked neither kinds, but he knew which ones would be most likely to kill them.
“I suggest we let Bilbo decide of our way,” he offered. “He is at the center of our journey, after all, since he’s the one we’re… taking home.”
The hobbit blushed when they all looked at him. All but Tauriel who glanced at Nori and grinned in a way that said plain enough that she knew they weren’t taking anyone home. Nori wondered if Legolas had figured it out too, and decided that it was likely. The two elves didn’t seem to keep any secrets from each other. They would have to talk about their real purpose then, sooner or later… but that could wait.
“I think I’d rather risk the elves if you don’t mind,” Bilbo announced, just as Nori knew he would. “I have seen quite enough orcs in my life already, and if I never have to be near one again, it will be too soon.”
Radagast sighed, clearly unhappy with the decision, but he didn’t protest.
“ With some luck, they won’t even pay us any attention,” he said, mostly for himself. “None of us are nearly important enough for them to want to see us.”
They changed subject after that, to discuss instead the best way to get to Rohan. In the end, they decided to just follow the Anduin, since it was the easiest way not to get lost, and would ensure that they always had fresh water, as well as fish to eat, if they decided they wanted something more than biscuits for dinner. Kili tried to say that it’d be nice to eat meat again, but he didn’t seem to convinced. None of them really wanted to leave Beorn, and the tall man didn’t appear to want them to go either. Nori suspected him of having kept them longer than had been truly needed, but in the end he found he didn’t really mind. They had all needed a break, and Bilbo even more than the others. The hobbit seemed in better health than he had been since their stay in Rivendell, and he would need all of his strength to deal with the rest of their travel.
Notes:
I am so very sorry for how long it took me to write this chapter. Let's just say that real life has been a little stressful for a couple weeks, and though things are supposed to be better now, I'm dealing with some anxieties and a writer's block that doesn't really let me work on my WIPs.
I'm trying to get over it, but updates might be rather irregular until I do.
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