Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Flug was so tired. He was so tired, that eyes had bags. He was so tired, his paper bag, had bags. He was so tired, that he had the same dream over and over again that he was screwing parts together for his latest machine, only to wake up and find himself twisting a screwdriver into nothing but air. Man, he really needed to get some sleep. Alas, the sweet embrace of slumber would have to wait until he finished this invention in real life, as per request of his boss. So instead, Dr. Flug settled for another cup of coffee to give him the push he needed to finish. It wasn’t just any coffee either. A single man with a workload as massive as his needed a little more than your average cup of joe, so Flug had created his own formula of caffeine, one that he kept in a beaker right next to his coffee cup, so that he didn’t get it mixed up with any of the other various substances that he kept around the lab. Was it dangerous that he regularly drank something that could easily be mistaken for a mixture that would cause your guts to liquify, or a concoction that would make you bleed from your eyes? Indeed it was, but Flug was not a genius for nothing. Every beaker in his lab was carefully labeled so that there was no chance that he would accidently drink the wrong thing.

Thus, Flug poured healthy dose of caffeine concentrate into his coffee and set back to work. The after taste of his drink lingered on his tongue, which he found to be quite pleasant, tasted like raspberries. Flug guessed that somewhere in the middle of his frantic work schedule, he finally got around to making the coffee additive taste good instead of extremely bitter. When had he managed to do that? Flug just shrug to himself, he would figure it out later, as he was at the moment, he couldn’t even remember what day it was.

~~~~~~~~

Flug had made major progress with his latest invention for his boss. For those villains who wanted to catch those pesky heroes instead of annihilating them on the spot, he invented a special type of capture capsule. A villain would only need to throw the device at a Hero to capture them, and then it would shrink down for easy transportation. It may not have been a completely original idea, but it was definitely the first of its kind in real life and not in some video game. Flug just needed to test it out, and then he could get some sleep. Gosh, he was so tired. It seemed that that last cup of coffee did not go as far as he thought it would. Flug made himself another cup of coffee with his special additive and nearly spit it out the moment it made contact with his tongue. Good lord, the coffee was so bitter! How could that be? Was he so tired before that even his tastebuds were affected? Flug squinted at the contents of his coffee cup, and then inspected the beaker full of his caffeine formula. It looked normal, and it clearly said on the label “Flug’s Fucking Coffee Stuff” (he was pretty sleep deprived when he labeled it). But… it DID seem like that because this was his second cup of coffee, that there should be less formula in the beaker… especially because he remembers putting quite a bit in that first cup. His face scrunched up in puzzlement as put his mug and beaker back on the table, thoroughly confused by this situation when he happened to glance at a third container of liquid that was suspiciously close to where his coffee items were, and suspiciously half empty. Flug quickly snatched up the beaker, and his heart dropped when he read the label.

“Love Potion?!?” he shrieked.

Dr, Flug tried to calm himself down. He could handle this, he could handle this. All he did was drink a little love potion that’s all. It was no big deal really, the potion’s effects only made you fall in love with the first person you saw, and he was alone in the lab so technically, the potion had not activated and if he could just avoid looking at anyone until the effects wore off, he would be in the clear. Thankfully, there were only three people, er, things in this house to worry about, so how hard could it be? Dr Flug slowly slumped down in a chair and cradled his head in his shaking hands. Who was he kidding, this was going to be extremely difficult. Without a doubt, he was in for a hellish day.

Chapter Text

“So you see, uh, sir. I was hoping that because I finished the devices t-that y-you asked for that m-maybe I could stay in my room today?” Flug asked, his question ending on a high inflection, revealing just how unsure he was about asking this favor of his boss. But, he was desperate. He needed to stay away from everybody (Dementia) more than ever today. Black Hat briefly glanced up upon hearing his request, but only for a moment before he went back to the papers on his desk.

“I assume this has something to do with that bag on your head being more ridiculous than ever with its lack of eyeholes today” Flug nodded “Well, as much as I would just love to give you a day off, we have important business today, business which you seem to have forgotten.” Flug’s mind jolted.

“Business? What kind of business?” What had he forgotten? He knew there was an open house auction thing that Black Hat was putting on, but that wasn’t for another couple days… at least he was pretty sure it wasn’t for another couple of days, but, he was been known to lose track of time when he was in a time crunch. When the word “deadline” had the potential of taking on a whole new meaning should the product be unfinished, everything else just fell to the background. Please let today not be the open house! If it was, Flug would not only have to worry about accidentally falling in love with his 3 colleagues, but about another 30 villains as well. Flug felt his chest constrict around his heart which had accelerated to a beat so fast that he was sure the thumping was shaking his entire ribcage. Black Hat rolled his eyes, his tone exasperated.

“Please try to mind the passage of time while you are in your own little world in the lab Flug, today is the open house, remember?” Flug wheezed “And you know very well that you have to be there. You are the head (only) scientist of the company. It is your job to showcase the products to our customers and answer their questions. I am certainly not going to do it” By the time Black Hat finished Flug was clutching at his heart and breathing a little harder.

“Uh, Sir, I, um, h-had a little accident last night. That’s why I-I was asking for a-a day off…” Flug said shakily. This caught Black Hat’s attention. He put down his papers and narrowed his eyes at his employee.

“Well. You are here right now, what kind of accident would keep you from doing your job?” Flug couldn’t see him, but he could hear the growing irritation in his voice, making him clench his hands harder in the material of his shirt.

“Well, uh, w-well you see sir… I accidentally drank some, uh, l-love potion. I thought it w-was, uh, coffee stuff… But on the bright side, I haven’t f-fallen in love with anyone yet! But, I-I will fall i-in love with the first person I see… H-hence the bag today…” he trailed off, gesturing to his bagged head. His explanation sounded weak even to his own ears. Flug heard a low hum from Black Hat that was way closer than he was a moment ago. A clawed hand ghosted over his bag and Flug’s whole body locked up in terror.

“What a ridiculously hilarious predicament you find yourself in, hmmm?” he purred, oh geez, way closer to Flug’s face than he could handle. Flug could feel his heart speeding up for a reason other than fear. His face was heating up, and even if he couldn’t see his boss, he could smell his Black Hat’s smoky cologne. Flug had never been more thankful for his paper bag barrier that was the only thing standing between his face and Black Hat’s sharp grin. It was almost as if his boss could sense his discomfort (he probably could), because he let a breathy little laugh right next to where Flug’s ear would be “So, if I were to say, take this bag off of your head and... make you look at me, you would fall in love? Immediately incredibly, immeasurably in love?” Every word dripped from Black Hat’s lips like a sickeningly sweet molasses, making Flug’s stomach felt like it was tying itself in knots, and his palms felt even sweatier than normal. The potion must be having some sort of affect on his body.

“W-well.. Yes s-sir, but please d-d-don’t do that…” he plead, reaching up to grab the bottom of his bad with both of his trembling hands. He hated when his boss teased him like this, getting too close to him, touching him with his clawed hands, voicing his thought to knowingly antagonize him. His heart couldn’t take it, if Black Hat didn’t back off, he was going to collapse! Thankfully, he heard his boss’ gravelly chuckle back to where his desk was. If Flug wasn’t so scared he could marvel at how quickly and quietly Black Hat could move. He was like a predator, or more like, he is the predator in this house.

“Well, whatever messes you get yourself into are your problem, and they will not interfere with your job. You will be attending the showcase at the open house tonight, and you had better not fall in love with anybody. I don’t care what you do, I don’t care if you have to wear that eyeless bag tonight, just do as I tell you, or you WILL face the consequences.” Black Hat’s tone left no room for argument. Flug’s shoulders sagged and he could feel his anxiety flare up. His mind was going a mile a minute envisioning everything that could go wrong. He could accidentally fall in love with a random villain and make a fool out of himself. He could accidentally fall in love with, lord no, DEMENTIA and make a fool out of himself while she makes a fool out of him. Or… he could accidentally fall in love with Black Hat and… and… he didn’t even want to think about what would happen then.

Black Hat didn’t care if he had to go to the open house blind, as long as he did his job. His job. That was all that mattered, that he did his job. Of course Black Hat didn’t care about his predicament, his mistakes were his and were not to inconvenience his boss, and he was powerless at this point to go against him. “ Am I clear Flug?” his bosses question pulled him back out of his mind.

“Yes, jefecito”
“Good. Now go clean up before our guests arrive.”
“Yes, jefecito” And with that, Flug shuffled out of the office, peaking out of the bottom of his bag so he could find the door.

Chapter Text

It seemed as if Flug could not catch a single break, for once he exited Black Hat’s office, instead of 5.0.5 standing there to guide him back to his room, he heard the insane giggling of their other housemate.

“Well, Hello there Flug” she greeted unusually cheerful “what’s with the new look?” she asked, giggling louder at her own joke. Flug screamed internally. On the one hand, he did NOT want to tell Dementia that he was under the influence of a love potion that basically left him blind or a lovesick puppy, he was way to vulnerable right now. But, on the other hand, what good explanation was their for wearing a bag on your head in the worst possible way?

“Uh, Well, you see, I had a minor accident in my lab e-earlier, and the, uh, the um, chemical effected my eyes soooo, they are very sensitive to light right now, very sensitive, so sensitive in fact that my goggles are not enough, and I need to cover them completely.” Dementia only continued to smile at him.

“Really? If you were wearing your goggles, how did the chemicals affect your eyes? I thought that your whole dealio was being a pro scientist, not some lab amateur” she teased. Flug frowned under the bag, he was no lab amateur, he was a top notch scientist for crying out loud! As much as he wanted to correct her arguing was not going to get him anywhere. It was best if he could slide out of this conversation as quickly and as smoothly as possible.

“Yea, well, we all make mistakes. And speaking of mistakes, I think I, uh, left a burner on in the lab! C-clumsy me, I better go turn that off!!” he exclaimed as he turned to leave, but was stopped in his tracks once again.

“You know Flug, someone who hasn’t just spent the last 15 minutes spying on Black Hat’s office might think that you are acting pretty strange right now.” Flug turned around again to see Dementia nonchalantly checking the chipping nail polish on her thumb. Or, that’s what he would have seen. He licked his lips, unease settling in his gut.

“W-what did you hear?” he could probably guess what she was alluding to, but if there was even a chance that she hadn’t-

“Oh, only that someone stayed up preeettty late last night and drank something that he probably should not have? A potion of some sort, perhaps? One that maybe, I don’t know, has some pretty strong emotional effect? Does that sound familiar?” Flug could hear the faux indifference slowly being replaced with a malicious glee and he started to sweat for the second time that day.
“I d-don’t know w-what you are t-t-talking about” Flug stuttered. But try as he might to deny it, Dementia was not buying it.

“Oh really? Well, maybe if I took that bag off your head and you could look at me you would see that I am being completely serious” she teased. Sensing that she was reaching for the bag as she made her threat Flug grabbed his head and scrambled backwards right into a wall. Damn not being able to see.

“All right, all right. Yes, due to some… unsavory circumstances I am currently under the influence of a powerful potion.”

“A LOVE potion” Dementia squealed

“Yes, yes, a love potion. So you can’t take the bag off my head, if I look at anyone I’ll be in big trouble!”

“Anyone?”

“Yes, anyone! And you can’t tell anyone at the open house tonight. To them, I had a minor accident in the lab and my eyes out of commission for now. I mean it Dementia, I don’t need to be worrying about you on top of this whole mess!” He could hear Dementia humming to herself. He could practically see her rubbing her chin in thought as she “considered” his request. She would most definitely try to blackmail him, but at least she wouldn’t do anything that would ruin the open house for fear of Black Hat.

“What will happen if you DO see somebody?” she questioned. Just the fact that she was trying to get details out of him was not a good sign. “ are we talking a small crush? Head over heels? Are you gonna be one a one way train to love city, lover-boy?” the sheer amount of amusement glee she was feeling at his problem irritated Flug.

“Why do you want to know so bad anyway??”

“I don’t know, it sounds like a pretty quality product you got. I might want to… borrow it sometime. For my own needs” She giggled. The fact that she was going to try it on Black Hat went unsaid. “So tell me!! Will you get all gushy? Want to kiss them? Want to BAN-”

"T-that is none of your concern. Because it WON’T be happening, right Dementia?” His tone was scolding as he tried to tell her off. But, he was panicking on the inside. The potion was guaranteed to work, no doubt, but he was not aware as to what degree and that terrified him.

“Sure thing Flug. But one more thing. Is this going to be a normal thing now? Are we gonna have to call you Dr. Love instead of Dr. Flug from now on? She cackled at her own joke.

“No, that w-will not be necessary. By my c-calculations, it should actually wear off by 7 tonight.”

“Okie dokie, well, good luck with your new look, Love Flug!” and with that Flug could hear her maniacal laughter fade as she probably scaled up a wall and climbed into a nearby vent. Flug let out an exasperated sigh. It seemed that his night just got a whole lot worse. He had no idea what she was planning, but there was no way it could be good. All he could do now was contact 5.0.5 to help him get ready for the guests and pray to whatever god had forgiven him for working for a demon for mercy.

Chapter Text

Flug sagged against the wall in the corner of the main showroom. With the help of 5.0.5 he had been able to make through the presentations easily enough, with him doing the talking and the bear doing basically everything else. All there was to do now was wait it out until 7 and hope no one paid any attention to him. He planned on staying in the corner where he knew that people could only approach him from one direction. Originally he thought that this would give him an advantage but, Dr. Flug did not think of the possibility of being trapped. At least, not until he heard a voice directed at him.

“Flug~” of course, it was Demencia. “So this is where you were hiding. How are you holding up, bud?” she asks, too giggly to really sound concerned.

“Uh, fine.” How good could he possibly be in this situation? He couldn’t help wringing his hands together “You know. Just… mingling” Demencia laughs much louder than necessary.

“Yea, “mingling”, because there’s so many people here in this corner” sarcasm. Classy.

“Demencia p-please. You know about my, uh, situation.” If she became any more rowdy, she was bound to draw so much attention to them and Flug was trying NOT to be noticed. “I-it would actually be a huge help if y-you could, uh, leave me alone and pretend I don’t exist.” he plead. Having the neon menace anywhere near him could only end badly.

“Weeeellllllll, if that’s what you really want.” She relented, sounding cooperative and more suspicious than ever. “I should probably get going anyway. There’s a guy heading this way that I know was looking for you.” Flug felt his insides turn to ice. “Yea, I was talking to him earlier. Handsome guy, nice eyebrows, sexy smile, seemed really interested in your device tonight, and maybe possibly more, if you get my drift. I just gave him a little help figuring out where you were hiding.” This did not sound good to Flug at all. Sweat started to bead on his forehead and his body got hot and cold and full of dread when he heard Demencia whisper secretively to him “After talking to him for a bit I am sure you too could see, well, eye to eye” And then Flug heard her witch-cackling explode right by his ear before then fade out with the general noise of the room. Demencia’s words could only mean one thing, she had actually told one of the villains at this party about Flug’s disastrous mishap. Before he could do anything to escape he heard another voice in his space.

“Good evening, Doctor”

Flug tried not to jump. Just as Demencia said, someone had sought him out, and once again Flug regretted his decision to try and hide in a corner.

“Ah, yes, g-good evening! How are you on this, uh, fine evening?” Flug said, doing his best to sound casual. Sweet-talking customers has always been Black Hat’s area of expertise, but as the head (only) scientist he couldn’t just not talk to a client.

“Oh, very well doctor. I have to say, your presentation earlier was very impressive! Your newest line of prolonged torture devices is definitely something to be proud of” Flug couldn’t help but glow with pride underneath his bag from the praise.

“T-thank you, sir! I’m sure Black Hat would be more than happy to discuss a deal with you! I’m sure he’s around he-”

“While I am definitely interested in cutting a deal, I actually was looking for you, Doctor” Flug can hear that his voice is creeping closer. “You see, I couldn’t help but notice that you seem to be going full bag today” Flug did not like where this was going “I understand that this is kind of your trademark, but I can’t even see your beautiful eyes this way. Do you think that maybe we could... go somewhere more private? Where we could continue this conversation and perhaps, see eye to eye?” Flug was internally screaming. This guy was trying to sound so flirty and seductive that it was giving Flug cold chills, and that was the exact same phrase Demencia had used before.There was no doubt, this guy knew about the potion and at the very least he knew that something was going to happen if Flug looked at him. Flug tried to make some distance, but found himself backed up against a wall. To make matters worse, he could feel the other man’s body getting closer, caging him in. “Please, there’s no need to run away. I just think that this is a good opportunity to, maybe get to know each other better.” Flug’s senses were screaming as he felt the other body’s proximity and that voice getting lower, quieter and more intimate and oily and this was way more than he could handle. He was breathing fast out of his mouth and it probably looks pretty funny, the way his bag was moving with his frantic breathing. The fact that this guy was trying to act sexy while Flug sucking in air like a fish was proof that there was an ulterior motive.

“Haha” Flug laughed nervously, trying to figure out how to diffuse this situation “There’s no w-way that I could leave the, uh, floor right now. Boss needs me to, you know, to be h-here to t-talk to clients” His hands started to fidget and his body shook, he had to get away! Every escape route racing through his mind was disrupted by the feeling of a large warm hand that was now on his hip, he was so close now that every breath drew in a huge whiff of his scent, suffocating him under his bag.

“Well, I am a client. You should stay here and talk to me” The man murmured, making yet another cold chill travel up Flug’s spine.

“Well, I, uh, think I h-hear someone calling for me? So, I should, you know, g-go? Over there. Yup, gotta--” Flug tried to slide out to the side, but was stopped by another arm leaning propped up on the wall by his head.

“Aw, don’t leave so soon! You don’t think that I am a client who wants to have a serious conversation? I bet if you were to look at me, you would see just how serious I am” Flug tried to laugh it off again but knew he was in danger when he felt a hand settle on the top of his bag. Quickly grabbing it, Flug held on for his life and slid down the wall until his ass hit the ground. He was blocked on so many sides it seemed like he would be forced to crawl through this man’s legs just to get away. Oh, Black Hat would have his head for acting so foolish in front of all their clients but Flug was not about to lose his head to some random Villain by falling in love with him! Just as he was going to make a blind break for it a foot came down on his leg to keep him from getting away and Flug felt his flight or fight response kicking in. He was about to struggle a lot harder in a last ditch effort to get away when--

“Newton, stop bothering this poor darling”

Chapter Text

Flug stilled with the sound of the new voice, an upper crust older woman from the sounds of it.

“Can’t you tell that he is trying to get away from you, Newton” she drawls, as if she is explaining something to a child. “I understand you aren’t particularly smart but usually such displays of brute force are rather... off-putting to say the least” Flug felt the foot lift from his leg.

“Well, Claudia, how would you even know when no man would be foolish enough to look at your ugly face for too long?” Newton growled. Claudia just hums.

“I suppose I’ll just have to put you out of your misery then.” Flug hears a zap followed by a strangled grunt and the thud of a body hitting the floor. “Come now, darling, let’s get you on you feet” A delicate hand met his bicep and he was gently guided to his feet. “You’ll have to understand, Newton likes to think he’s some sort of playboy, that that’s the kind of flirting people enjoy. Truly, the only smooth thing about him is his brain!” The laugh that accompanies her joke is light and very lady-like. Normally, he would be thankful for the help of getting away from that creep and attract the attention of such a woman, but he knew that this encounter was also probably a scheme to get his back off. He laughed along with her to be polite, but he felt uneasy.

“Heh, yea.. Well, uh, thank you ma’am. For, uh, helping m-me out there” Her hand gave his arm a gentle squeeze.

“Oh, don’t mention it, darling. But, if you did want to show your thanks, I would love it if you would join me for a bit” Flug hesitated. He couldn’t see, so leaving his spot with this woman was a little risky but on the other hand staying in the corner was just asking for another person to, well, corner him.

“Oh, um, sure” He might as well just go along with this.

“Splendid!” Arm in arm, the woman, Claudia led them… somewhere, all he could really tell was he was still in the large room where they were hosting the guests. “So, I’m sure you probably get this a lot but I am a big fan of your work, your special ray gun that turns heros into crystallized sculptures is one of my favorites. It’s really made my lair a sight to behold.” again, Flug has always been weak to flattery and praise, especially since it was so rare in the workplace, and he felt his face warm up and his posture straightened up a bit.

“Well, I-I’m glad you are enjoying our p-products! That was definitely a unique product for us, usually we go for um, weapons that are more f-functional than stylish b-but it really helped us branch out into more, uh, of those type of, um, things!!” As much as Flug was nervous around other Villains, he did enjoy talking about his inventions.

“Yes! I’ve been a loyal customer ever since. I hope you don’t mind me asking, especially at an event like this, but my lazer dagger has been acting up recently, I can’t get it to ignite, do you think you could take a look” Flug heard the clip of a purse, he guess that she was pulling out the dagger of a very expensive purse.

“Sure, I-I can check it out b-but depending on, uh, what’s wrong I might not be able to fix it now”

“That’s fine, I have it right here” and sure enough Flug felt the hilt to the dagger pressed into his hand. With just a cursory feel of it, it didn’t feel like there was any evident damage on the outside, which meant that it was an internal matter. Flug had thought that these things were built to be pretty sturdy, bit perhaps Claudia’s was well used. After feeling the weight of it in his hand, shaking it around near his ears and testing its balance and other signs of something being knocked loose.

“Well, it kind of sounds like the igniter on the inside was knocked loose somehow. If’s its not connected properly the laser won’t ignite, so you just have to unscrew the cap and reset it.” Flug provided, holding the dagger out back to her. She didn’t take it back immediately, and Flug was left awkwardly standing there, blindly holding the dagger until finally Claudia spoke up.

“You, um, you don’t need to take a look? LIke, a real look at it?” she asked, sounding a tad bit confused. Flug shrugged.

“Not in this case, I can tell what’s wrong and its a pretty easy fix. The igniter is supposed to be easy to access so it’s not a big deal.”

“Well, I thought I checked that already, so do you think you could just double check the whole thing? Just to make sure?” obviously this was some sort of trick to get Flug to take his bag off, her voice had taken on a persuasive tone and he could almost imagine her giving him a few bats of her eyelashes.

“H-How about I just go ahead and, uh, check the igniter” Something Flug is able to do without having to look at the dagger itself. Just things you learn to do when you invent something and then manufacture it. Once he fixes it and turns it on to prove that it works, he is left holding it out to Claudia awkwardly, waiting for her to take it from him.

“That’s quite… impressive.” She does sound genuinely impressed, but Flug also hears a little but of disbelief that her plan didn’t really work. “You are quite the expert in your work Dr. Flug. It’s not everyday a woman runs into a man as fine as you,I would be flattered if you would join me for a drink?” hm. Seems like she was going with plan B. Flug was about to express how fortunate it was that he brought a straw with him when a sound interrupted him.

Again, Flug can’t see (something he’ll never take for granted again), so he is not quite sure what has happened when he hears two people crash into each other, and a surprised gasp from Claudia.

“Ooops, how clumsy of me!” says a modulated voice, it sounded like one of the villains who wear helmets, and they did not sound the least bit sorry.. Then there was a huffy sound from Claudia and the sound of high heeled shoes stomping away. “It seems like Miss Claudia had to go clean up her dress, so I guess it’s just you and me!” This person definitely sounded excited to be alone with Flug. Of course they are, Flug sighs internally.