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Are We Enemies or Friends

Summary:

Eilana Stockridge is a 17 year old American girl, going to a ridiculously elaborate British high school. She's lived in England with her mother for a year now, but she's only made one friend. Louis. They've grown quite close over the year, but Louis has started to develop romantic feelings for her, which makes things a little complicated. Meanwhile, the most popular group of boys in school, Harry, Zayn, Liam, and Niall, bully her on a daily basis. But when she becomes involved in their personal lives, it's hard to make out who's a friend and who's an enemy. She thinks her life is hell now, but when she starts letting her emotions get the best of her, the real drama begins.

Notes:

So I actually originally posted this to another site and I let my readers vote to choose who she ended up with. It was definitely interesting, and I was surprisingly happy with the result. Just a little experiment I did, and I had a lot of fun with it.

It's (obviously) already finished, but I'll be posting up a new chapter at least every other day, but I'll try to post every day. Hope you like it! ^_^

Chapter 1

Notes:

-Harry Styles- His father owns the school, so he gets away with everything. He's the schools baddest bad boy.

-Zayn Malik- The most feared name in the school halls. Known for his violence and womanizing ways.

-Liam Payne- Also a best friend of Harry's. Although known for a bad boy rep, he's surprisingly nice.

-Niall Horan- The last in the bunch of Harry's gang. He's the quiet one of the group.

-Louis Tomlinson- Eilana's best friend. Very sweet, but thinks with his heart and not his head. Very popular, but has a pretty clean reputation.

Chapter Text

"Guess who, lovely?"

I felt two soft hands wrap around my eyes, blocking the view of my locker. I couldn't mistake that voice. Louis. And noting that he was the only person in this school that talked to me anyway, it could only be him.

I sighed and removed his hands, turning around to look at him. There was a smile beaming on his face as always.

"Hello Louis."

He frowned in a playful way, looking like a child. "You ruined my fun!"

"Louis, you do that like, every other day." I stated matter-of-factly, crossing my arms.

"Well you could at least play along…"

I gave him a small grin before turning back to my locker, retrieving the things I needed. Louis put his arms around me, resting his chin on my shoulder. Louis was a hugger. But then I guess I am too.

"You seem tired. Didn't sleep well last night?" He asked, a concerned tone in his voice.

"I had nightmares again, Louis." I said, sighing.

I had nightmares about Harry and his mates bullying me and hurting me. And sometimes, let's just say, they get really horrifying. Louis knew about them, of course. I was always telling him everything.

Louis poked out his bottom lip and furrowed his brow slightly. "I'm so sorry, love."

He hugged me tighter and then let me go. I shut my locker and turned to him with a smile on my face. It was fake, but it fooled most people.

"I'm okay, Louis. Really."

"But you always say that, Eilana. When are you going to mean it? You've been through so much, I just want to help."

I could tell by his face that he saw right through me. Like always, he was the only one who did.

He stared me in the eyes for a while, trying to get an answer. When it didn't come, he sighed heavily.

"Alright, fine. I just want my best friend to be okay again." He said, taking a strand of my hair between his fingers.

"I was never okay, Louis."

He looked up at me with the saddest eyes.

I wish he wouldn't do that to me.

"Just don't leave me. I need you, Louis. I need my best friend."

"I'll always be here for you Eilana, you know that."

I gave him a smile, knowing that he meant what he said. Louis never lied to me. He was the best friend I could have ever asked for. Even if he was the only one I had, I didn't mind. He meant the world to me.

Suddenly our sweet moment was interrupted by that all too familiar voice.

"Well, look who it is!"

Great. The person I hate more than anything else in this world. Harry Styles, and all his minions. Niall, Zayn, and Liam.

I watched with a scowl on my face as they approached Louis and I.

"It's my favorite poor person! How did you get into this school again?" He asked loudly for everyone around us to hear. And of course, a few people turned towards us, tuning in.

"I paid. Just like everyone else." I replied, no expression on my face as usual.

He sneered at me, laughing. "With what money?! I'll never understand why my father let someone as lowly as you into this school. Did your mummy fuck a lot of people to get you in here?" He looked at me like I was a piece of trash. The rest of his crew just stared at me with unreadable expressions.

"You can suck a dick, Harry Styles!" I shouted, my nerves getting the better of me this time. I already wasn't having a great morning. This was the last thing I needed.

He laughed in my face and gave me a smirk, giving me a once over. "No thanks, but you can suck mine if you'd like." The famous mischievous glint in his eyes sparkled brighter.

Louis stepped in front of me. "Why can't you just leave her be, Styles? What did she do to you, you dick?"

A look of annoyance appeared on Harry's face. "This doesn't concern you, Tomlinson."

"If it has to do with Eilana, it has everything to do with me." Louis puffed up, giving Harry a threatening look.

Zayn and Niall stepped up to Louis in Harry's defense. I pulled Louis closer to me. He looked back at me with question in his eyes.

"They're not worth it Louis. You might as well bloody your knuckles beating a trash can." I said simply.

Harry gave me a disgusted look. "Are you saying I'm trash?"

"No. I'm saying that you hold it. Because let's face it Styles, you're full of shit."

I heard people trying to muffle their laughter. Even Niall had a chuckle about it. Liam had a smile on his face, and Zayn gave me a look of amusement. Harry just stood there, mouth agape.

I grabbed Louis, turned on my heel, and walked away. With a look of satisfaction, no doubt.

Once we turned enough corners, Louis pulled me to a stop. He yanked gently on my hand to turn me around.

"What was that about back there?" He actually looked upset.

"I don't want you to get hurt, Louis." I stated calmly. I knew telling him that was a bad idea, but I said it anyway.

"Just let me protect you Eilana! I want to! That's what I'm here for! If I don't put them in their place, they're never going to leave you alone!"

"No, Louis. I'm not worth it. You don't have to handle my problems."

He looked at me with sad eyes for a second before he gently pulled me into him. He hugged me in a comforting way before he pulled back and locked eyes with me.

"But I want to take care of your problems, I'm your friend. And don't you ever say you're not worth it! You have no idea what I would do for you."

We were silent for a while, just standing in the middle of the empty hallway, staring at each other.

"Louis, what would I do without you? You are seriously the best friend ever. You are so sweet. Don't ever change."

He smiled down at me, laughed, and kissed me on the cheek.

"Never."

We hugged for a few seconds before realization hit me.

"I'm going to be late to class." I stated blankly.

"Right. Me too. See you later." He waved and smiled at me as he started down the hall. I gave a small wave back as I headed to class.

I sat down at my desk in the very back, but not without everyone staring at me as I walked past. The boy next to me gave me a sour look. I sighed and put my chin in my hand. This was going to be another long day.

~

I was just about to sit down with my tray of lunch. Unlike most schools, this school, being ridiculously fancy and expensive as it was, had really good cafeteria food.

I had just spotted my usual table when the oh, so lovely Harry Styles walked past me, stopping only for a second to stick his hand under my tray and shove in onto me. With a wicked smile, he continued to rub it into my clothes. I didn't react much, except to leave my mouth hanging open in shock as my food and drink slid down my skin, seeping through my clothes. Some of it even went down my shirt.

He let the tray drop finally, and walked away smirking, his minions in tow.

Everyone in the room was staring at me. Some were even taking pictures and a lot of them were talking about me.

I scoffed to myself. They didn't even have the decency to whisper behind my back. What disgusting, spoiled little rich kids they all were. Not one of them had an ounce of decency.

"Are you okay?! What happened?" Louis questioned frantically after he made his way over to me.

"Harry Styles." It was all I had to say.

Louis dragged me out of the cafeteria and into the men's bathroom. Thankfully there was no one in there.

He sat me on the counter by the sink and tried his best to clean me up. He removed my red cardigan and set it to the side. Almost nothing got on it, thankfully. My T-shirt was another story however.

He removed my shirt and ran it under the warm water from the sink. I felt a little chilly, but not awkward. Louis had seen me in my underwear many times before. Although I was still a little shy about it.

While that was rinsing out, he took one of the fancy, clean, white hand towels hanging from the wall, and wet it, scrubbing gently at my jeans.

"Louis, I can do it." I laughed lightly, reaching for the towel in his hands.

Although Louis was my friend, I still viewed him as being above me. His family was rich. I mean, really rich. And he was more well trained and mannerly than me. I hated making him do this kind of stuff. I didn't feel worthy enough for him to dirty his hands.

"No." He pulled his hand away from me. "I want to."

I furrowed my brow at him and laughed at his babying me. I reached for it again. "Come on Louis, I c-"

"Please." He looked at me with serious eyes.

I just let it go. He proceeded to scrub at my jeans until he was satisfied and rinsed the cloth again. Starting on my stomach, he wiped away the bit of sticky cola that seeped through my shirt. I looked at his face, he seemed so relaxed doing this. He moved up to my chest, rubbing gently on my collarbone. I started to get a bit pink in the cheeks. He stopped and pulled away when he felt he was entering dangerous territory.

"Um, I'll just let you get the rest. Your shirt needs to be rung out." He handed me the cloth and stepped over to the sink, ringing my shirt out with his hands. When he was done he folded it and tucked it into his pocket.

"Hey, I need that ya'know?" A curious look on my face.

"You're not wearing this. It's damp, you'll get sick. Here." He pulled off his dark green sweater and gave it to me, leaving him in a white T-shirt. He rolled up the sleeves slightly and I looked at him like he was crazy.

"I can't wear this, you're going to freeze!"

He just smiled and shoved the sweater into my hands. "I'll be fine. You need it more than me. Just wear it. Please?" He clapped his hands together and stuck out his bottom lip.

I sighed and threw it over my head, stepping down onto the floor. I turned around looked in to the mirror.

His sweater was a little big on me, but it still fit. It came mid-thigh over my pale pink skinny jeans. I pulled my long, wavy, brown hair out of the sweater, sweeping my fringe out of my eye. I slipped my black toms back on, and grabbed my cardigan off the counter.

"Thank you, Louis." I said, hugging him. He hugged back and shot me a smile.

"Anytime, love." He grabbed the cardigan from my hands and led me out the door.

He soon took the lead and I followed him to my locker. He opened it up, and stuck the shirt and cardigan in it, closing it.

"How do you know my locker combination?" I questioned him with a shocked face.

"I have my ways." He laughed evilly in a joking way and I slapped him on his arm for being such a dork.

"Come on, let's go get you some food."

"But that's all the lunch money I had." I said, feeling a bit embarrassed.

He gave me a sweet grin and pulled me close to him, putting his arm around me. "I know. I'll buy you lunch."

"But you-"

"No protesting!" He shouted, cutting me off. I just blushed and walked with him into the cafeteria. The looks I was getting didn't bother me. I had become used to it.

I scanned the room and saw Harry and the rest of them sitting at their usual table. I made eye contact with Harry. He was smirking right at me. I didn't respond and looked away.

What could I do?

Chapter Text

I stepped out of the shower and dried off. I put on my leopard print bra and red lace underwear. I wrapped the towel around me and walked out of the bathroom.

I am so happy that it's the weekend. I need a break from school.

As I walked into my room, I shut the door behind me and dropped my towel like I usually do. I let out a shriek when I turned around to see Louis looking me up and down with a small grin on his face.

"Louis William Tomlinson!" I yelled, eyes wide and pointing a finger at him.

"What? Sorry..."

I let out an aggravated sigh.

I swear, this boy...

"Maybe you shouldn't drop your towel when you walk in your room without looking. I could have been a rapist or something you know..." He said, cheekily smiling at me.

"Or, maybe you shouldn't be laying on the bed in my room, waiting for me to get out of the shower! You cheeky bastard..." I trailed off, opening my closet.

Louis immediately jumped up from the bed and made his way to my closet. He started picking through things. He pulled out a pair of bright teal skinnies, and a flowy, cream colored blouse.

"Wear this."

I took them and started putting them on. When I was done, Louis shoved a pair of caramel brown Toms in my face.

"And these."

I put them on too, watching Louis rummage through my jewelry box now. He was having too much fun with this.

He did this often. He liked doing it, and I always liked what he picked out, so I just let him.

He walked back over and stood behind me. He put the necklace around my neck and clasped it in the back. I loved this necklace. It was my favorite.

I looked at myself in the mirror. I actually looked cute for once. I carefully touched the necklace as it glistened in the mirror. The diamonds were in the shape of an E, lined in real gold. The wire thin chain was gold too.

Louis gave it to me for my birthday a few months ago. I told him I couldn't accept it, but he insisted I have it. I don't even want to know what it cost.

"You look perfect." Louis smiled at me through the mirror. He put his arms around me, hugging me now that I had clothes on.

I blushed and looked down at the floor. "Thank you, Louis."

I walked over to my vanity and sat down. I started to put my eyeliner on. I always wore it in a thick cat-eye. When I was done with that, I swept on some mascara. Louis watched me as I applied the makeup.

"You know you don't need any of that, right?"

I looked at him with a disbelieving face and continued putting it on. "Yes I do, Louis. You might be used to my horrifying face, but the rest of the world isn't." I laughed slightly and got up. I grabbed my phone and wallet. Even though there wasn't any money in it at the moment.

Louis rolled his eyes, leaning against my door. "Whatever. Are you ready yet?"

"Yeah. Let's go." I said, pulling him off the door and opening it. Louis followed behind me and out the door.

He jogged ahead of me and opened the passenger side door of his black Jaguar for me. I got in and rolled my eyes. He shut the door for me and got in the drivers seat.

"Where are we going?" I questioned, looking over at him.

He looked back at me with a twinkle in his eye. "You'll see."

After a few minutes of driving, we pulled up to... the ice cream parlor?

Oh my word, Louis is such a child.

"Uh, this is what I got ready for?" I asked playfully.

He pretended to look hurt. "I wanted some ice cream and I didn't want to eat it alone." He pouted.

I laughed at his childishness. It was adorable though. This is why we were friends.

He opened the door for me and I walked in, the cold air and sweet smell hitting me. Louis grabbed my hand and headed straight up to the counter. We ordered our favorites and Louis paid for mine since I didn't have any money on me. He paid for everything anyway. I always felt bad about him paying, but he never seemed to mind.

We sat down and started to eat our ice cream cones. I was talking and holding my ice cream close to my face, when Louis' eyes lit up with mischief and nudged my hand, making the ice cream hit my cheek.

I stopped talking and narrowed my eyes at him. "Louis."

He laughed, leaned over, and licked it off my cheek.

"Louis!"

He chuckled again, smirking at me. I felt my face get warm and looked away.

We finished our ice cream over jokes and playful banter. We got back to the car, I turned on The Fray and sang along. Rather loudly, might I add. But I didn't care. It made Louis smile.

We pulled up to the mall. I gave him a questioning look.

"We're going shopping." He shot me a small grin.

I was about to protest when Louis opened his mouth again.

"I'm buying you stuff and you can't say no!" He smiled at me crazily and hopped out of the car, opening my door. "After you, love."

~

"Looouiiis! I can't take anymore! I think we've been in every store here!" I whined.

Louis was carrying at least seven bags full of stuff he had bought me. He refused to buy anything for himself. He said that today was about me. Whatever that meant.

We were walking by the food court when I bumped into someone.

"Sorr-Oh"I rolled my eyes at the person in front of me.

"Hello, Eilana." Harry looked from me to Louis, noticing all the bags he was holding.

"Out shopping with the boyfriend, eh?" He smirked at me.

I noticed only Niall and Zayn were present. Niall was preoccupied with his phone, and Zayn was scowling at Louis.

"No. We're just friends, Styles." I rolled my eyes at his weak observation.

"Oh, right. What was I thinking? You actually having a boyfriend? What man could put up with your bitchiness?" He sneered at me.

I kept my blank face. He always said stuff like this. It was getting old. I looked to Zayn and he made a quick kissing face at me. I gave him a disgusted look and turned away.

"Yeah, yeah. Unfortunately, I'll see you around, Styles."

"Please, call me Harry." He smirked at me.

I showed off my longest finger and walked away while Louis laughed at my rude gesture, following behind.

"Let's get out of here." I muttered to Louis.

I didn't want to be here anymore, anyway. I think if I spent any more of Louis' money, I would die.

~

We walked through the door to my house. I headed straight for the kitchen to get a bottle of water. I looked around, taking note of how tiny my kitchen was. I was used to it though. I just hated Louis coming over all the time. It made me uncomfortable for him to be in such a small house.

How was I going to such an expensive school you ask? Well, it all started when I was 12. My dad was having his fourth affair, and my mom decided she had enough, so they got a divorce.

It didn't bother me though. I didn't like my father. We were never close. He never tried to have a relationship with me, nor did he care to have one. I haven't spoken to him since I was 14. He's an ass, however you look at it.

My mother and I stayed in America for 2 years, but mom decided that she wanted to chase her childhood dream of being a fashion designer. And where better to do that, than England? So we moved.

As for having the money to attend the most expensive school in England? My grandmother is filthy rich. Although she and my mother are not on good terms, she loves me to pieces. She insisted that I go to the best school in England. She shares her money with me all the time. Or she did. But she won't share it with mother. Shame. I wish they would just get over whatever trivial matter it was that they're fighting about.

My mother and I weren't the poorest people ever, but we certainly weren't rich.

"Looks like mom isn't home..." I thought aloud, taking a sip of water.

Louis set down the bags he was holding and stepped close to me, pulling me into him, our faces inches apart.

"You know what that means..." He looked at me with an intense gaze.

I got completely lost in his blue eyes within seconds. I was frozen under his stare. My breathing slowed, and my heartbeat quickened.

However, it only lasted a few seconds. I watched as a mischievous smirk slowly grew on his face. I was snapped out of it completely when Louis suddenly broke the heavy silence.

"Tickle party!" He grabbed my sides and tickled me with no signs of mercy.

"Louis! Stop! I can't breathe you twat!" I struggled to say between laughs.

I was leaning over the counter at this point. I caught sight of Louis' eyes for a second. Just as I thought, he was enjoying this way too much. He had a giant smile on his face and an evil twinkle in his eye. I hated when he did this. If I didn't get away soon I was going to pass out.

He let up for just a second so I could catch my breath, but he had no intention of stopping. So I took the chance and darted out of the room, Louis chasing after me. There wasn't really anywhere to run in this small house, so I ran around the large coffee table. We probably circled it four times before I ran back into the kitchen.

"Oh come on, Eilana! I just want to hug you! I promise!" He yelled after me.

He stopped when he saw that I was up against a wall. The most playful smile appeared on his face when he saw me. He approached me slowly, arms out.

I knew better than to trust Louis when he was like this. When he got close enough, I threw my bottle of water right at his nuts. It was just enough to make him pause, and I ran to my room giggling.

"I'm going to get you for that!" He tried to sound serious, but the fact that he was chuckling didn't help his case.

He was hot on my trail. I tried to shut my bedroom door on him, but he was too close behind me and he pushed it back open with ease. I backed up until I hit the wall. Louis crept up to me again, this time his arms at his side.

What is he plotting now?

He stared me in the eyes, but they didn't have the same expression as before. They were serious now. The grin dropped from his face too. He was a few inches away from me again.

He brushed the hair out of my face, his hand trailing around to the back of my neck, holding it gently. His other hand came under my chin, tilting my head up slowly.

I was frozen solid again.

The things this beautiful boy does to me...

I had never seen his eyes like this before. They held an emotion I had never seen from him. Although I couldn't make out what emotion it was, I could tell it was a strong one.

Before I could register what was going on, I felt the warmth of his lips on mine. They were so soft. And they moved in perfect sync with my own.

His kiss was so gentle, he held me like I would break any second, but I still felt so secure in his embrace. I don't know why I was kissing him back. I didn't like Louis like that.

Do I? I might start after this... Wait.

Louis is the only friend I have. I don't want to screw up our friendship.

We broke apart for a second to catch our breath. I figured I should say something. "Lou-" He cut me off, kissing me again. I just let him.

Who was I kidding? I liked it. Even though I wouldn't admit it.

He pulled me closer and put his hand on the small of my back. I was absolutely melting into his kiss.

Damn, he's good.

But this couldn't happen. I couldn't let this happen.

I pushed Louis away from me, turning my gaze to the ground. No doubt my whole face was bright pink.

"What are you doing?" I snapped at him. I don't know what I feel right now. I'm so confused.

He looked at me with an odd face. It was a mixture of upset and confused. "Kissing you?"

I scoffed at him. "Well no shit, Sherlock! I figured out that much myself!" I raised my voice at him. I'm not even entirely sure that I was mad at him in this moment, but it seemed like the most logical emotion.

He just looked ashamed at this point. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have. I don't know what I was thinking. Please just forget that happened. I'm so sorry..."

I watched him as he became flustered, running his hands through his hair.

His beautiful hair. I want to touch it. No! Stop thinking like that. He's your friend, Eilana. Don't screw this up!

"Do you want to hit me? Come on, it'll make you feel better." Louis stuck out his jaw, pointing to it.

I sighed and rubbed my face. "I'm not going to hit you, Louis..." I looked up at the ceiling, trying to clear the thoughts that were running rampant in my head. "Just, don't do it again."

"I won't! I'm sorry!" He made a pouty face at me, getting on his knees and grabbing my lower leg.

I laughed at his dramatic reaction. This boy was too much. "It's okay, Louis. I forgive you." I rolled my eyes and he got up and hugged me.

"Good! Because I would die if I ever lost my best friend." He lightly touched the tip of my nose and smiled brightly at me.

I couldn't help but smile back. I could never stay mad at him for long.

~

After Louis left that night, we didn't speak to each other until I saw him at school on Monday. He walked right up to me like nothing had happened. Even though we talked it out, I couldn't stop thinking about it.

"Have you run into hells minions yet?" Louis asked, making an annoyed face.

"Fortunately, no."

I was actually having kind of a good day. I knew it wouldn't last long though. They would find me soon enough.

Why can't they just leave me alone? Is it really that amusing to irritate me?

"Oh! I have to get to class! I'll see you later!" Louis hurried off in some random direction. It took ages to get anywhere in this school. I mean, really, why is this school so damn big? It's ridiculous.

I shuffled around in my locker, looking for the hairbrush I always kept in there.

"Looking for something?"

I groaned at the sound of Harry's voice.

"What do you want, Styles?" Anger already evident in my voice. I gave up on it and shut my locker, maybe a little too hard.

"Already mad?" He asked, faking concern.

"The very fact that you exist, is enough reason for me to awake angry every morning." I turned to him with my best sarcastic smile. "But that thrills you, doesn't it?"

He gave me a smirk and then nodded at the others. Without a word, they all walked off. I gave Harry a confused look. He grabbed my wrist and turned around, dragging me with him. I snatched my hand back, stopping in my tracks.

"What the hell do you think you're doing, Styles?" I looked at him like he was crazy.

He grabbed my wrist again, so tightly it hurt. He dragged me into an empty class room, and shut the door.

"Come on, what are you doing? I'm already late for class." I whined to him as he turned back around to me. His emerald eyes were dark and more dangerous looking than usual.

He pushed me up against the wall and placed the palms of his hands on either side of me. "What makes you think I hate you?"

I stared at him in disbelief. "You're not serious, right?"

He gave me a blank look, waiting for my answer. But I was distracted. His face was so close to mine, I could feel his breath on my face. He was leaning rather close to me. Much too close for me to be comfortable. I might hate him, but he's still a boy.

A very fine boy. Ugh! I hate my thoughts.

I put my hands on his chest and attempted to push him away. He didn't budge, but a sinister smirk appeared on his face.

"Move." I demanded.

He didn't say or do anything, just stood there.

"I don't know what you're trying to do here, but it's not working." I narrowed my eyes at him.

He chuckled and pushed the hair off my neck. "I can fix that."

He leaned down and kissed my neck. I didn't know how to react to this. I didn't think he would do something like this. I put my hands up again and tried pushing him away. I managed to catch him off guard and he swayed back slightly.

"What are you doing?!" I asked angrily.

He gave me a warning look, and attached his lips to my neck again. He started sucking and nibbling all along my neck.

"Stop! Please! Please.." I whined. I was starting to panic, and began trying to push at him again with all my strength, but it didn't do anything.

I felt him smirk against my neck at my failed attempt. The sick bastard was enjoying this. I became angry and started full on hitting him with my fists. I didn't know what else to do.

He pulled away for a second, giving me an aggravated look. He grabbed me by the wrists and pinned me to the wall. "Don't play so hard to get, Eilana. I know you want this." He gave me a wicked smirk and bit my neck, sucking harshly.

He moved down to the crook of my neck, where my neck and shoulder meet, and licked it, blowing on it. It sent chills through my body. It felt so good. And I hated myself for allowing that. I've never had anyone kiss me like this. It was amazing.

I still struggled against him, but he was too damn strong. I hate him and his stupid arms.

He started kissing his way up my neck again. My neck was already tender from his treatment, and hyper sensitive to his touch. He stopped on a spot that felt particularly good. I felt his teeth graze my skin, and before I could stop myself, I let a moan escape my mouth. I felt him smile against my skin again. It made me sick to my stomach. I was enjoying this, but at the same time, I hated it. My emotions were all over the place lately, and this wasn't helping.

Suddenly, he stopped. He pulled away and looked at me with the cockiest face I've seen him make yet.

"That's what I thought." He said, letting me go. I swear my wrists are going to be bruised.

"What the hell, Styles?! I gripped my hurting wrists, giving him a shocked expression.

"You know what they say, always leave them wanting more." He said as he strolled out the door casually.

What just happened? I'm so confused, my head hurts.

I pulled out my phone and checked the time. Well, there wasn't any use in turning up to class now. I scurried off to the ladies room, checking around every corner for Harry. He could be anywhere.

If I wasn't scared of him before, I was now.

I clutched the counter top in my hands, steadying myself. I looked in the mirror. I could see the terror on my face, but I could feel the butterflies in my stomach.

Why was I feeling like this?

Louis was enough, but now Harry the prick too?

I sighed, hanging my head in guilt.

This was going to be a long day...

Chapter Text

I felt a poke in my lower back for the hundredth time in this class.

I turned around in my seat to look at Louis sitting behind me, a sweet grin on his lips. I smiled back and turned around.

The classes I had with Louis didn't totally suck. He made everything better somehow. He could always make me smile. Hell, he could make anyone smile. I even recall him making Harry Styles smile once.

Harry Styles. A chill ran up my spine at the thought of him. Recalling today's earlier events, I pulled my hair to cover my neck, and snuggled into my red blazer. Looking around discreetly, I hoped no one would notice my sudden change of mood.

I felt Louis' foot on my back again. This time he tapped in a rapid manner. I turned around again. He had a concerned look on his face.

"Are you okay?" He mouthed to me.

I put on my best fake smile and nodded. He didn't look convinced but he let it go for now. I turned back to the teacher. Quickly becoming bored, I scanned the room.

My eyes stopped at the blonde boy by the window, staring out of it. Niall Horan. He always seemed oblivious to his surroundings. I gave him a once over out of curiosity.

He was wearing black skinnies, a white V-neck T, and a dark purple cardigan with the sleeves pushed up. I glanced down to his feet to see the same red Supras he always wore. They must be his favorite or something.

I'm not going to lie, he looked damn good.

I know he's part of Harry's crew, but the whole time they've been picking on me, he has never once said or done anything to me on his own terms. He seemed quite nice compared to the rest of them.

Maybe he isn't so bad. Maybe.

He even stuck up for me a few times. Harry wasn't too happy about that. I didn't have a problem with him personally, he was just guilty by association. And to be honest, I've had a crush on him since the first time I saw him.

I woke up from my trance and realized he was staring straight back at me.

Oh shit!

I averted my eyes as quickly as possible.

Well, that was awkward. How long was I staring at him? How long did he see me staring at him?!

I fiddled with my hands for a second before glancing over my shoulder. I saw Louis looking at me with a raised eyebrow.

Did he see me staring at Niall? Great. More awkward.

I didn't respond and looked away. I could feel Niall staring at me. His ice blue eyes were burning through my soul and I wasn't even making eye contact with him.

I was uncomfortable for the rest of the class, which thankfully didn't go on for much longer. I don't think he looked away once. This guy had some nerve. I think Louis noticed I wasn't too comfy, as I could pratically feel his gaze on the back of my head. I wanted to run out of this room screaming. If there was anything that made me uncomfortable, it was people staring at me.

Class let out and I popped out of my seat, grabbed my bag, which I had already packed up, and darted out of there. Not even waiting for Louis like I always do. I couldn't help it that Niall made me nervous.

I got halfway to my locker before I heard loud footsteps and felt a hand on my shoulder, slowing me down.

"Is everything okay? You ran from that room like it was the plague. What's going on?" Louis asked, out of breath.

"Nothing. Just...tired." I lied horribly.

He looked at me with furrowed brows. "Did that Niall bastard do something to you?!" He raised his voice, getting angry at the very thought.

"No!" I said a little too fast.

He gave me a questioning look. "I saw you staring at him." He accused. "When he noticed, he wouldn't stop staring back at you. I don't like that."

I kept walking with my head down, avoiding eye contact. When I didn't say anything, Louis got more worried.

"If he did something to you Eilana, just tell me. Because I swear I will fuc-"

"Louis! He didn't do anything, okay? It's fine. I'm fine." I sighed and pushed my way through the grip he had on me. I made it to my locker and quickly shut it after I was finished.

Louis sighed and gave me a hug. "Look, I'll see you after school, okay? If you need anything you know where to find me. Promise you'll come to me?" He looked serious as he gripped my shoulders.

I smiled sweetly at him. "Yes, Louis. See you later."

At least he'll drop it for now.

Sadly that was my last class with Louis for the day. But I only had two more to go anyway. I waved to Louis as he took his leave.

I was on my way to the ladies room when I passed by Harry in the hallway. He was flanked by Zayn and Liam. I hardly noticed though. My eyes were locked on him. I felt the most intense shiver in my body as he passed by me, making a kissy face and winking at me.

I kept my head down after that, blushing involuntarily.

Washing my hands, I looked up at myself in the mirror.

Boring, plain. That's what I saw. I wouldn't say I was ugly, but I wasn't some rare beauty either. I don't really know what's going on.

Why were Louis and Harry acting so strange lately? I don't get it. Why did Louis kiss me? Surely it wasn't because I'm irresistable. Because I'm not. And Harry? I don't even know where to begin questioning that.

It was all very confusing. And all very... at once. This feeling Harry gives me, I'm not sure what it is. And Louis. He was suddenly looking more and more attractive as the day went on. I couldn't stop staring at his lips.

Ugh. What's happening?

~

As I walked to class, I rounded a corner a little too fast and collided with another body. Whoever I hit was much bigger than me, resulting in me hitting the ground.

"Sorry!" I heard, their voice thick with an Irish accent.

I looked up to see Niall's crystal blue eyes staring down at me with worry. He extended a hand out to me, a friendly smile on his pouty lips.

He looks so good. Why does he have to look like this?

I could feel my heartbeat in my chest becoming more rapid. I reached out and took his hand. It was soft, but his finger tips were calloused. It must be from that guitar that he's always got with him.

Where does he keep that thing anyway? I'm surprised it's not around his neck right now...

He pulled me up gently, but with great strength. I could see his bicep flexing under his cardigan.

Oh hell, he is fit.

He flashed a smile at me, and I gave him a small but confused smile.

Is he being nice to me? Why?

"You alright?" He asked, looking me over.

I blushed and pulled my hand back, pretending to dust myself off. "Yeah, I'm fine."

He raised an eyebrow at me. "You sure? I hit you pretty hard."

I nervously laughed at nothing. "No, really, I'm fine." I said barely above a whisper. I can't stop blushing around him.

"Uh, okay. Well, I'm sorry anyway. I should pay more attention to where I'm walking I s'pose." He chuckled slightly and gave me a toothy grin.

We stared at each other for a second, and then he bent down and picked up my book bag. I failed to notice I had dropped it. But then I failed to notice everything when I was staring at him anyway.

He held it out and I took it with my trembling hand. "Thanks." I could barely hear myself speak.

He smiled at me sweetly. "Well I'll see you around, Eilana." He brushed past me, strolling down the hall and earning a million stares from the girls.

Well, that was... weird. He seemed so nice, and genuine. It that how he really is? How the hell did he end up with Harry and his group?

It was then that I realized I was holding my breath. I took a big inhale and slowly let it back out.

I am so screwed up. Why can't I like normal guys? Why do I have to like the super rich, flirty, good looking Irish one?

I sighed out of frustration and moved along to class.

~

"I'll get the drinks!" Louis said, walking into the kitchen.

We were having a movie night. We had them all the time. Louis didn't like me being home alone.

I swear, that boy was too worried about every little thing.

Mom was out late again. I really don't know why she insisted on staying so late at work.

I grabbed my favorite blanket and threw it on the couch. Walking over to the fire place, I struck a match and threw it in there, starting the fire. It was way too cold outside for this time of year.

Louis set the drinks down on the coffee table and laid down on the couch, drawing the blanket over him.

I popped the first movie in and turned off most of the lights, leaving the lamp on. Louis held up the blanket and patted the space left on the couch in front of him.

I laid down on my side and snuggled up under the blanket.

Mmm, so warm.

Although most of the warmth was coming from Louis. He wrapped his arm around me and pulled me closer to him. I loved snuggling with him. It always made me feel better.

After a while, I was so comfortable I was drifting in and out of sleep. I thought I was imagining things when I felt lips on my neck. They were barely there. Louis was placing butterfly kisses all over my neck. I didn't move. I was too confused.

What is going on with Louis? Is he just really horny lately, or what? What do I do? How does he expect me to respond to this?

Maybe the way I am responding. Which is enjoying it. It felt so good. Louis was so gentle, but it was such a turn on. I couldn't help it. I just closed my eyes and let him.

He trailed kisses up my jaw and turned my head with his finger tips. I let him kiss me and I shifted my body to face him. I was too lost to care anymore. He held me to him with his arms wrapped tightly around me. I tangled my fingers in his soft brown hair, and he slipped his warm hand up the back of my shirt, rubbing soft circles on my back. We stayed like that for a little while, just enjoying each others kiss.

He pulled back and stared at me. His expression was sweet. He placed a soft kiss on the tip of my nose and chuckled softly. He snuggled closer to me, if that was even possible, and closed his eyes. I could hear his breathing becoming softer and slower as time went on, and his hand stopped tracing patterns on my back. I smiled at the sleeping Louis in front of me.

I started to think about what just happened, but I decided it would be better to save that thought for a later time, when my thoughts weren't completely controlled by the crazy emotions I was having right now.

I put my head on Louis' chest and let myself drift off.

I'll deal with this tomorrow...

Chapter Text

I awoke the next morning in a surprisingly good mood. I reached over to grab my iphone like usual. The one Louis bought me of course. I could never afford to buy one myself. I felt around everywhere, but it was nowhere to be found.

Wait a minute, why am I in my bed?

I rolled over and into a warm body. It scared me and I jumped up in bed, turning around, I saw Louis sleeping beside me. He was on his side, curled up and gripping my pillow. He looked like a sweet, innocent, little boy.

All I wanted to do was snuggle up to him and stare at his face. He was so beautiful.

Why am I feeling like this?

To be honest, I was always attracted to Louis. When he talked to me the first time, all I could do was blush and stare. But I never really liked him like that. Probably because I knew I would never have a chance with him, and I don’t. He only sees me as a friend. Nothing more.

I carefully slid off the bed slowly. When I successfully made it off, I made my way across the hall and into the bathroom.

I stripped myself of all clothing. I only now noticed that I was missing a few articles of clothing from the night before. Louis must have taken them off after he put me in bed. I blushed at the thought of Louis removing the clothes from my body. It was only a blazer and my thigh highs that he took, but it was still enough to make my cheeks turn pink.

I quickly got a shower and dried off, wrapping the towel around myself. I forgot to grab underwear, but oh well.

 

Louis’ P.O.V

I was woken up by the sound of a door shutting. I jerked my head up, looking towards the door. My eyes were still adjusting to the light, but I could tell it was Eilana.

“Sorry. Did I wake you?” I heard her sweet voice.

I sat up and rubbed my eyes. I attempted to fix my hair, which I’m sure looked horrible.

“Mm, it’s okay, love.” My voice was still thick with sleep as I flashed her the brightest smile I could muster this early in the morning.

She walked over to her dresser, pulling out what looked like lacey underwear.

Oh, bloody hell. She’s not wearing any right now.

The thought of her naked body being right under that damp towel was enough to drive me mad.

My eyes finally returned to their normal, clear state again. Although that’s probably not a good thing at the moment. She was in her own little world, looking through her dresser.

I took this opportunity to look her up and down. Her hair was dripping wet, leaving trails of water down her flawless, porcelain skin. Her legs caught my attention in that much too short towel. They were long and smooth, and I longed to touch them. Not to mention that she has the cutest feet.

She turned around to look at me with a stern face.

Her face.

She didn’t have a spot of makeup on, but she looked so beautiful. She was easily the most beautiful girl I’ve ever seen, and I was falling completely, madly, in love with her. She was perfect to me and I didn’t stand a chance.

“Louis, turn around. I have to get dressed.” She crossed her arms, waiting on me.

I rolled my eyes playfully and flopped down on the bed, sticking my face into her pillow. It smelled like her. I took in a sharp breath, savoring her sweet scent. I could get high off of this. She was my drug. I couldn’t stand to be away from her.

I can’t be thinking these things about my best friend. This is wrong. She would never love me anyway.

I sighed and laid there patiently, beating myself up about this.

“Thank you, Louis. I’m so glad you’re a gentleman.” She said giggling, letting me know it was okay to look now.

“Hey, how did I get I here anyway? Didn’t we fall asleep on the couch?” She questioned, pulling on a pair of ripped, white skinnies under her denim button up. She had the sleeves rolled up, looking beautiful as always.

“I carried you in here last night. You kept stirring and looked like you wanted more room, so I brought you in here.” I replied nonchalantly, trying to keep my cool attitude.

“Oh.” She replied dryly. Although I swear I caught her blushing.

I thought back to last night and what happened. I guess she was just choosing not to bring it up. I was a little upset about that. I got chills just thinking about kissing her.

The things this girl does to me…

 

Eilana’s P.O.V

Last night played over in my head for the hundredth time this morning. I blushed without fail every time. I hoped Louis wouldn’t notice.

I grabbed the towel from off the floor and dried my hair with it. When I turned around, Louis was staring at me with focused eyes.

“Louis?” I asked with a raised brow.

“Hm?” He snapped out of it, looking at me with an attentive expression now.

I decided not to say anything and just turned around, walking to my vanity. I swiped on some makeup and brushed my hair, now that it was almost dry. Louis came to lean against the vanity, watching me closely.

“You’re so beautiful, Eilana.” He brushed the hair from my face, brushing his thumb across my cheek.

I could feel my temperature rising. I stood up and walked to my jewelry box. I started rustling through it to get my mind off of Louis.

I’m not sure how strong my willpower is, but after last night, I don’t want to test it. Staying away from Louis was my best bet to stay out of a mess.

I heard Louis sigh and get up, walking back to the bed and plopping down on it. I felt bad for brushing him off, but I don’t want my mind to wander in the silly direction it was starting to wander.

“Louis, don’t you need to go home and get ready for school?” I suddenly realized he was wearing the same clothes. Black skinnies and a white T with the American flag on it.

He looked down at himself and shrugged. “I guess so. But I don’t really want to.”

“Then shouldn’t you be on your way?” I urged him along.

He made a silly face at me, pretending to be mad, and walked towards my door. “I’ll see you at school then.”

“Bye Louis.”

I waited until I heard the front door shut, then I jumped on my bed and angrily screamed into my pillow.

Why is this happening to me?

~

I didn’t even make it into the school building before I ran into Harry and the boys. They were hanging around the big oak tree in the courtyard left of the entrance.

Zayn spotted me first. I saw him pointing at me with a smirk on his face as he alerted the others of my presence. They made a straight line for me.

Upon reaching my personal space, Harry grabbed my book bag from me. “Thought you could just slip by unnoticed?” He taunted.

He started going through my things, pulling them out and dropping them on the ground one by one. I stared at him with my mouth agape.

What an audacious bastard!

“Hey! Stop! You’re going to break something!” I half shouted at him. I tried to pick up my things at the rate he was dropping them, but it didn’t matter.

He finally stopped and looked at me with disdain. “We wouldn’t want that, now would we? I almost forgot, you’re so poor, this is probably all that you have.” He teased, giving me my bag back.

“Thanks, you ass.” I rolled my eyes at him. That’s when I realized that Zayn was holding something of mine. “Alright Malik, give it back.” I sighed and dropped my arms to my sides. I am so tired of this shit, and you think they would be too.

Zayn decided he would hold it just out of reach. “Work for it, bitch.”

After about ten tries and several laughs from the boys, I still had nothing to show for my effort. I looked to Liam who had a sympathetic look on his face to my surprise.

He walked up behind Zayn and snatched my item right out of Zayn’s hand, giving it back to me. “Alright guys, I think she’s had enough.”

Harry and Zayn looked at him like he was crazy, but let it go.

He pushed my back gently towards the front doors, giving me a rushed look while his back was turned to them.

I walked into school and went about my day like nothing happened. After all, it was just a normal day for me. Well, all except Payne sticking up for me. That was odd.

I shut my locker and walked around a few corners, finding my way to Louis’ locker. He was nowhere to be seen. I waited for him, but he didn’t show. Eventually I had to leave, though. I guess he was just really late or something.

~

I was walking to class when I was suddenly yanked into an empty, dark room. Thinking it was Harry, I panicked and started to scream. They muffled my cries for help with their hand and turned me around. My eyes widened when I saw Zayn towering over me. Although I probably shouldn’t be so surprised. He had a rep for being all kinds of things. A rapist was one of them. Now, there wasn’t any real proof of it, but people still talked about it. And all the girls still loved him despite the rumors.

I tried jerking away, but he had a tight grip on me. “What do you want, Malik?”

He smirked and pulled me close, wrapping his arms around me. “I think you know what I want.”

I gave him a disgusted face and tried pushing him away again. No use in that. I wasn’t going anywhere at this rate. He backed me up to the wall, pressing me against him. I could feel how strong he was. It was frightening.

“I didn’t get to have my fun with you this morning, so I’m going to have it now.” He whispered in my ear. Instead of sounding like a threat, he made it sound like a simple statement.

I’m not going to lie, it sounded sexy. I wasn’t going to deny that he was good looking.

No! He’s trying to rape you, Eilana! Get a damn grip!

“I don’t think so!” I spat back at him angrily. I used every muscle I had to try and get away, but it just wasn’t happening.

I heard him laugh at my feeble attempt to overpower him. His laugh was… sinister. It gave me chills.

Why me?! Where is this all coming from?! I don’t want this attention!

Zayn grabbed my face rather harshly and slammed his lips into mine. His kiss was hungry and full of nothing but pure lust. I decided my only way out was to hit him in the most sensitive spot and hope for the best.

I lifted my knee as quickly and as forcefully as I could, hitting him right between the legs. I got hopeful for a second, but he barely even flinched. He looked at me with anger in his eyes. He grabbed my wrists with one hand, and the back of my neck with the other. Colliding his lips with mine again, he began grinding his hips into mine. I whimpered at the force of everything. I wasn’t used to this. I’ve never had a guy treat me so rough.

He ran his tongue over my bottom lip and then bit it. It caught me off guard and I gasped. He took the opportunity to shove his tongue in my mouth.

I was furious. How dare he do this to me. He really is a creep. Yeah, I definitely hate him as much as I thought I did.

Well, I’m screwed. Or raped. Whatever the appropriate term for this is.

That’s when the door busted open. Zayn barely moved, but looked in that direction. I looked as well, curious as to whom my savior was.

“Zayn! There you are! Harry’s been looking for you. Come on!” Niall stood in the doorway. I noticed his eyes kept trailing back to me, probably wondering what the hell was going on here.

Zayn groaned in annoyance and looked at me one more time. His brown eyes had me paralyzed. “Later.” He growled before storming past Niall, stopping only for a second to ask where Harry was. Niall pointed in a random direction and he was gone.

I was shaking. I couldn’t move. I just stared at the ground. I expected Niall to just walk away any minute, but instead, he approached me cautiously.

“Are you okay?” He asked, concern evident in his voice.

“Yeah.” I barely got out. I managed to look up at him.

He gave me a curious face and came very close to me, looking me in the eyes.

At this point, I wasn’t about to trust anyone from this friend group. I flinched away from him.

His expression changed to one of sadness. “I’m not going to hurt you. I promise. I just want to make sure you’re okay.”

I relaxed at his soft voice and reassuring words.

He took my hand in his and brushed it with his thumb. “Are you okay?” He looked at me with soft eyes. They were such a calming blue. His whole presence was calming.

“I think so. Thank you.” I answered timidly.

Does he know what was going on?

As if reading my mind, he responded. “And by the way, I know what was going on. That’s why I came here. All that about Harry looking for him was a load of bullshit.” He admitted.

I raised my eyebrow at this information. “How did you know?”

“Zayn kept bragging about his plans earlier. Kept on about how he was going to have some real fun with you. I’m sorry about not coming earlier…” He rubbed the back of his neck and looked down. He had the look of guilt on his face.

“I’m just glad you came here at all. Otherwise, that would have been it for me. So, thank you so much…” I trailed off, becoming more shy with each word I spoke.

He flashed me a sweet smile. “A beautiful girl like you shouldn’t be treated like that.” He realized he was still holding my hand and let go of it slowly. “Will you be alright?”

“Yes, I’ll be fine. Thanks again.” I blushed at all the worrying he was doing over me.

“Well, I’ll see you around, okay?” He gave me a crooked half smile.

“Yeah, sure.”

He led me out of the room and made his way off, leaving me alone in the hallway. I let out a loud frustrated sigh.

Can I have one day that isn’t crazy?

“There you are! What were you doing in that room with him?” I could already hear the anger in Louis’ voice.

“What? With who?” I panicked. I didn’t want to tell Louis about this. I couldn’t. He would try to kill Zayn and all the rest of them if he found out.

“I saw you leave that room with that Niall twat a few seconds ago. He had his hands on you, and you looked terrified! What is going on?! What did that fucker do?!” Louis’ voice was getting louder with each word out of his mouth.

“Louis, calm down! Niall didn’t do anything to me!”

His eyes were growing dark with anger. “You don’t have to lie to me, Eilana. I’m here for you. I just want to help. I saw you two. You should have seen your face! You looked absolutely scared out of your wits! Eilana, what did he do to you? Please tell me.” He just looked sad now.

“Look, I’m fine. I’ll tell you about it later, but for now I have to get to class, I’m already late. See you later.” I brushed past him quickly and ran as fast as I could to class.

I was not looking forward to that conversation…

Chapter Text

I scrubbed at my body harshly as the warm water ran over me. All I wanted to do all day was take a shower. After what happened with Zayn, I felt dirty. But it was a kind of dirty that I couldn't wash away.

I dried off and was getting dressed when there was a loud knock on the door. I put on my last piece of clothing and walked to the front door. I opened it to see Louis standing there with his head down. He looked up and smiled nervously at me.

"Hey Louis." I wasn't surprised that he was here, but I was confused as to why he looked nervous.

"Hi. Uh, can I come in?" He asked timidly.

I gave him a weird look and motioned him in with my hand. "Of course you can, Lou. You practically live here anyway. Why are you asking? And why did you bother to knock? You never do that..."

Something was bothering him, I could tell. He was fine this morning.

He stood there awkwardly, looking around.

"Um, have a seat." It came out as more of a question. I didn't know what he wanted to do.

This is weird. I can usually read him, but right now I feel like I barely know the man. I've never seen him act like this. Louis Tomlinson doesn't get nervous.

He took a seat on the couch, clearly uncomfortable. "Are you mad at me?" He asked, looking at me.

"Why would I be mad at you, Louis?" I was confused.

Did he do something?

“Well, I guess I’ve kind of been over reacting to things lately, and it seems to get on your nerves…” He started tracing small circles on the arm of the couch. “I just want to make sure you’re okay. I want you to be happy, but it seems like I’m kind of ruining it for you. These last few days you’ve been running away from me when I ask if you’re okay. It just worries me. I don’t want to smother you or anything.” He spoke quietly, staring at his finger as it drew patterns against the material.

There was a short silence between us.

“Louis, I’m not running away from you. And I’m not mad, I just…-Yes it gets on my nerves a bit, but I know you just do it because you care, and in a way, that makes me happy when I think about it. There’s just a lot going on with me lately and it’s stressing me out. I’m sorry I haven’t really been hanging around you at school. I didn’t even notice. Things have just been a little crazy.”

I sat down next to him, but he still didn’t look at me.

“Oh.” He shifted uncomfortably. “Am I part of it?” He finally looked me in the eye.

“A part of what?” I asked.

“Am I stressing you out?” He responded quickly.

I remained quiet for a second before voicing the little white lie. “No, Louis.”

“Then why didn’t you tell me that you were so stressed out? I could help, you know?” He looked upset.

“Honestly, it hasn’t crossed my mind. And besides, I don’t want you to feel burdened with my problems.” I said semi-honestly.

“Eilana, I’m here for you! You know that! I want to help you all I can! I will not feel burdened, but honored, that you came to me with your problems. I’m your best friend, and that’s what best friends do, right? Or have I lost that title?” I saw realization flash in his eyes. “Is that what it is? Have I screwed up our friendship because of my selfishness? It’s how I’ve been acting lately, isn’t it?” He looked horrified and sad.

“No! Not at all, Louis. You will always be my best friend! Even if somewhere down the road, you hate me for some reason, I will still love you, and in my mind you will still be my best buddy.” I grabbed his hand and smiled at him.

He faintly smiled back at me. “Well, I’ll never hate you. You can bet everything on that.” He pulled me into him.

I rested my head on his chest and pulled my legs up onto the couch. Louis was always so comfy.

“I love you, Eilana. You’re my favorite person.” He said, kissing the top of my head.

I smiled at his sweet words. “I love you too, Louis.” I turned my head and kissed him on the cheek.

He looked at me with an uncertain look in his eyes. “Have I made a mistake?” He asked me, putting his fingers under my chin.

“What do you mean?” I asked, although I had a feeling I knew what he was asking.

“Kissing you.” He said, pulling me closer.

I felt myself go pink, and my hands were becoming shaky. “No.” The word slipped right out of my mouth.

That’s when I realized what I had said. But it was true. I wanted it. I found myself wanting his kiss more and more every day I went without it.

He closed the gap between us, softly pressing his lips to mine. He tasted so sweet, like candy. I mentally rolled my eyes.

He’s such a kid.

His kiss both calmed me down and got me worked up. I absolutely melted into him. He started rubbing my back up and down slowly. He knew I liked it, he did it all the time, but it was different this time. It was more intimate, more sensual. I climbed onto his lap, tangling my hand in his hair. I felt his hand on my thigh as he deepened the kiss. His lips were soft, but he kissed with such dominance. I liked it though, because I knew that Louis would never hurt me. After what happened with Zayn, I needed this. I felt loved and wanted, not like a sex doll.

Louis’ hand rested on the small of my back, pulling me into him. His kiss was so passionate and sweet, and I moaned into it, blushing at the sound that had escaped my lips. I felt Louis smile and lightly chuckle. I tugged on his hair softly. It was his turn to moan now. He let out a deep, gruff moan, and the sound of it made me hot. His kissing got a little more heated, slipping his tongue in my mouth, he asserted dominance over me with it, and I was more than willing to submit.

My eyes opened in confusion when I heard a little jingle break the almost silence. I realized it was my phone, and broke the kiss, getting up to retrieve it. It was mom.

Eilana: Hello?

I glanced over at Louis. He was just sitting there, looking happy with himself.

Mother: Darling, I’m sorry but I won’t be making it home tonight. I’m afraid I’m going to have to pull an all-nighter to get this wedding dress made. Will you be okay by yourself?

Eilana: Yeah, I’ll be fine. Louis will be here.

Mother: Oh good. That makes me feel better then. If you need anything you just call, okay sweetie? I’ll see you later, love you!

Eilana: Okay, love you too, mom. Bye.

I smiled into the phone before hanging up. I walked back over to the couch and sat down next to him.

“Mum?” He asked, already knowing the answer.

“Yep.” I responded, looking at the clock. 9:27pm.

Neither of us were going to bring up what just happened. It was better to just leave it.

“Mom isn’t coming home tonight.” I told him, only now realizing how suggestive that sounded. I mentally slapped myself for putting it that way.

He smiled at me with a knowing look. “Okay. You want me to stay?” He asked.

“Yes, please.” I blushed under his stare.

“Gladly.” He said, kissing me on the cheek. He stood up from the couch and stretched.

“Where are you going?” I looked up at him.

“Relax, I’m just going to the kitchen to get something to drink. I’m not going to leave you. We just established this.” He said, laughing lightly at my frantic question.

I laughed too, blushing again. “Will you grab me a soda too?”

“What’s the magic word?” He asked in a sing-song voice.

“Please.” I answered, not even looking at him as I turned on the tv.

“Nope!” He said loudly. “Try again.”

I scratched my cheek and thought for a second. “Louis is the coolest and most awesomest and funny person ever, and I love him more than life itself?” I said questioningly.

“Yep!” He chirped and proceeded into the kitchen.

I giggled at his silliness and flipped through the channels trying to find something entertaining, but there was nothing good on.

Louis entered the room, handing me my drink.

“Wanna play something?” I asked him.

“Yeah! Let’s play Super Smash Bros.!” He said, pulling it out and putting it into the PS3 that he kept over here.

We sat on the floor crossed legged and grabbed the controllers, spitting playful trash talk to the other.

~

I rolled over on the bed and looked at the clock. 11:39pm.

I looked to Louis, who was sitting on the end of the bed, playing my acoustic guitar. He was looking at me with a blank expression.

“Louis, I’m sleepy.” I said, rubbing my eyes like a child.

He smiled at the sight and put the guitar down. He crawled over to me and laid down, throwing his arm around me. “Then go to sleep.” He said with a goofy grin.

“Oh, is that all I have to do? Thank you, Louis. I would have never figured that out myself.” I replied sarcastically.

I got off the bed and walked to my dresser. I took off my top and put on a soft black t shirt, and replaced my jeans with my comfy pair of red shorts.

“Are you going to sleep in that?” I asked, pointing to his clothes.

“Well I don’t exactly think one of your T shirts is going to fit me.” He joked and pulled off his shirt. “Do you mind?”

“No, not at all.” I replied. I had to stop myself from staring.

Holy shit, his body.

I had to slap the voice inside my head and made my way back to the bed. I climbed in and turned off the lamp. I rolled over and came face to face with Louis. His eyes were sparkling in the dim moonlight coming from the window. He smiled at me and played with a strand of my hair. He always did that. It was relaxing to me. I closed my eyes and thought about everything.

Right now, we’re clearly just friends. It felt the same as always, but things were starting to get a little more intimate. I don’t know what’s going on between us right now, but whatever it is, I don’t mind it.

~

I walked through the school doors, headed for my locker.

I was feeling better than ever. Yesterday with Louis was just what I needed. I was walking around with a smile on my face. I never did that.

“Well, someone looks happy.” Harry said, walking up behind me and putting his arm around me. “Tell me, what could such a poor, boring girl like you be so happy about?”

I pushed his arm off of me rather harshly. “Don’t touch me, Styles.” I said flatly, stopping at my locker.

“I’ll touch you when I want, because what the hell are you going to do about it, bitch?” He hissed, getting in my face.

“Just because your daddy owns this school, you think you’re fucking invincible, don’t you?” I spat back at him. “I can still get you in trouble somehow, so watch it.” I threatened.

He stuck his jaw out, clearly angered. “I would love to see you accomplish that.” He smirked. “I’m so well connected, I could get away with murder.”

“And I’m sure you have.” I said.

He narrowed his eyes at me. “Now, do I seem like someone who would do that?” He asked with a fake smile.

“Yes.” I said bluntly.

“You’re rather honest, aren’t you?” He asked with amusement.

“I guess so. While we’re on the topic of being honest, I feel it’s my job to tell you that you’re being a bitchass right now. Didn’t know if you noticed or not, but now I know you’re aware.” I said flippantly, smiling.

Harry hit the locker behind me with his fist, making me flinch. “You’re such a bitch!” He raised his voice, coming very close to me. “That’s the fucking line, slut. If you’re smart you won’t cross it again.” He seethed.

Niall stepped in and pulled Harry back. “Back off, man. There’s no reason for this. Why don’t we just go?”

Harry turned to him with a scowl. “What the hell? Are you defending her?” He asked angrily.

Before Niall could say anything, I piped up.

“The only reason I’m a ‘bitch’,” I said, making air quotes with my fingers. “is because you were an ass to me in the first place, little boy.” I stated, turning to walk away.

Harry grabbed my arm. “Where are you going? Did I say you could leave?” Harry looked like he was insane.

Niall and Liam grabbed him and tore him away from me.

“Come on, man. Let’s just go.” Niall said.

“Yeah, seriously. You’re getting this worked up for nothing. You need to calm down.” Liam added.

They began to walk away with Harry. Zayn looked at me and licked his lips, winked at me, and walked away with the others.

A chill ran through me. I hate him. I hate both of them. They’re scum. I don’t care how much money they have, I could never like them. I would sooner jump off a cliff.

~

I was sitting in class, minding my own business. I decided to tune into the teacher for once. She was going on about some project and how we’ll need a partner.

Lovely.

I looked at Louis, who was behind me and to the right. Louis and I were always partners.

“I’ll be putting you together at random.” The teacher spoke.

I heard a chorus of annoyed sighs and grunts throughout the class, as well as my own. I listened out for my name, praying Louis’ came after it. There was still hope. Half of the class had been called and neither Louis or myself was called yet.

“Eilana Stockridge, and Liam Payne.” She said loudly.

I sighed and buried my face in my hands.

Are you kidding me, world? Can I just get one break? One?

I looked to my left, only to see that he was already looking at me. He was probably feeling the same way right about now.

Wait, did he just smile at me? Okay… that’s weird. And a little creepy.

Usually when you hate someone, you don’t smile at them. Unless you’re going to kill them or something.

Oh fuck.

I looked away in panic, keeping my gaze on my desk. I calmed myself and shook my head, dismissing my ridiculous thoughts. I sighed in annoyance, having to be stuck with one of my enemies.

Can this get any worse?

“Lily Monroe, and Louis Tomlinson.” I heard her call out.

You have got to be kidding me. Ugh.

I felt sick. To top this all off, Louis was paired up with the most beautiful girl in this class. She clearly liked Louis, always flirting with him and touching him every chance she got.

Oh well. The worst that could come of this is that Louis falls in love with her and leaves me behind completely. Yep, that’s just enough for me to fling myself from this earth. Let’s just hope she has a bad personality or something.

I looked to Louis. He was looking at me with a sad expression. He mouthed a sorry to me. I just shrugged and slumped down into my seat.

This was just a fabulous day.

~

After class, Liam came up to me.

“Hey.” He greeted simply.

I gave him a weird look. “Hi. Sorry you got stuck with me.” I said, although I really couldn’t have cared less for his feelings.

He smiled at me. “Um, yeah. That’s actually what I wanted to talk to you about. Do you want to come over after school and get to work on it? I just like to get things out of the way, ya’ know?” He quirked an eyebrow at me, waiting for my answer.

Hmm. He was actually pretty cute. Too bad he’s an ass.

“Yeah, sure. You’re the boss.” I said, lifting my eyebrows.

“You don’t have to! I was just asking…” He exclaimed quickly.

I studied his flustered expression and furrowed my brow. “Uh, yeah. No that’s fine.” I replied back with a confused face.

“Great!” A huge smile appeared on his face. He pulled out a small piece of paper and wrote on it quickly and held it out to me. “This is my address and mobile number. Just come over, let’s say, seven?” He asked.

That seems kind of late, but whatever.

“Sure.” I replied dryly, studying the ink on the paper.

He turned and walked out of the room with a smile on his face.

Well, this is just going to be barrels of fun…

Chapter Text

2720 Brenford Lane.

I stopped at the right address. Looking up to the giant white house.

Well, this isn't intimidating at all. It's just like Louis' house.

I let out a sigh of frustration. I did not want to be here.

Why do these things happen to me?

I bet we're not even going to get anything done because he's just going to tease me the whole night.

I pulled myself together, picked my head up, and walked to the bright red door, knocking my knuckles rapidly three times against the wooden surface.

While I waited for a response, I took in the rest of the house.

It was huge for starters, two stories tall, with a countless number of windows. Just the neighborhood it was in made me feel beyond out of place, just like my school. Everything was so clean. Not a speck of dirt in sight.

The house was gated, with tall black iron fencing. The gates stood open though, I'm guessing because I'm expected. There was the greenest grass I had ever seen flanking either sides of the walkway, and a small garden lining the entire front side of the house.

There were four white, marble steps up to the house and onto the porch. I noticed that the porch was also made of marble. Six thick white columns stood, intimidatingly large across the porch, with white suspended swings on either side. Lush, beautiful potted plants lined the walls, accenting the door that was a shiny apple red, with a large, fancy golden knocker on it.

As I was admiring the little details, I heard the door swing open. I whipped my head back around, a familiar pair of brown eyes catching mine.

Wow. What a beautiful color.

"Hello!" Liam greeted me with a smile.

...Why is he smiling at me? Weirdo. I swear he's up to something. The others better not be here, or I'm leaving, and this sicko can do the project by himself for all I care.

"Yeah, hi." I mutter, looking away. I felt awkward and didn't know how to react to this odd behavior of his.

"Well, do come in, please." Liam stepped to the side and gestured to the large house behind him.

I stepped in and took in my surroundings. It was absolutely breathtaking.

Just the foyer had to be bigger than my living room. It was a cream color with white trim. The floors are white marble, just like the porch, and there's a grand staircase in the middle of the room, also made of the same marble, with a pathway leading different directions on the either side.

The ceiling had to be at least twenty five feet high, and it was brightly lit. There were expensive looking furnishings here and there, very expensive looking paintings covered the walls, and the smell of freshly cut flowers and sea breeze in the air. On either side of the room there were double doors, leading to, what I assume, were more ridiculously fancy rooms.

"You like it here?" I heard Liam's soft voice slightly echoing through the large room.

I snapped around at the breaking of the silence. "It's not really my kind of style." I lied, taking it in. I pretended to be unimpressed as I looked about the seemingly empty house.

"I know it's a bit ridiculous, but you get used to it." He said, sounding a bit amused at his parents’ choice for a living space.

"Where is everyone? Don't you have a family? It seems pretty quiet..." I questioned him, actually curious.

His face seemed to falter ever so slightly, but then picked back up again. "Oh um, I asked them to leave for a little while. You know, so we can have complete peace and quiet to get things done." He answered, sending a small smile in my direction.

I narrowed my eyes at him in suspicion. "What are you up to, Payne?" I asked accusingly.

He looked at me with a surprised expression. "What?! No! I'm not up to anything, I swear to you!" He panicked, holding his hands up in defense.

I studied him for the real answer, but he seemed to be telling the truth.

"I still don't trust you." I crossed my arms over my chest, looking at him out of the corner of my eye.

He appeared to be amused at my tough act. He smiled humorously and ran his hand through his hair, looking to the side and back at me. "I understand. I don't blame you. If I was in your place, I wouldn't trust me either. Although I'm perfectly trustworthy right now, I promise." He shot me another smile, but this time it was different. It was a full blown smile with teeth and everything, and it melted me to the core.

My word, man! Why are you such a puppy all of a sudden? I've never seen him smile like that before. It's a damn trap! Look at that! He's so adorable! Okay Eilana, snap out of it. Think of how this man and his friends treat you. He is not a puppy. He is a mean, rich, spoiled, bratty kid. No matter how much I just want to pinch his cheeks off and put them in my pocket for safe keeping.

I cleared my throat, finally getting a hold on myself. "Let's just get this over with." I said as calmly as possible.

Liam sighed and looked around. "Sure. Would you like something to drink first? Maybe a snack or something?" He offered politely.

I laughed sarcastically. "So you can put a roofie in it you bastard? I'm sure you'd love that, wouldn't you?" I spit the words at him angrily.

He flinched at the harsh words, giving me a crazy look. "I would never! How dare you accuse me of such foul thoughts!" He kept his calm mostly, almost looking more hurt than upset.

It was my turn to give him a weird look. "Well, Harry could have told you to do something to me. You never know..." I implied, looking down at the floor, almost feeling bad.

"I'm not Harry's dog, you know..." He states, looking at me with a questioning brow.

He sighed when I gave no reply and crossed his arms. "Have I ever done anything to you?" He asked, becoming irritated now.

I thought about it for a second, not wanting to say what he wants, even though it’s the truth.

“No…” I mumble under my breath. Even though in this room, the slightest sound makes an echo. I get what he means now about wanting it to be quiet.

“Have I ever hurt you?” He continued.

“…No.” I answered grumpily.

“Have I ever hurt you emotionally?”

That one makes me flinch, although so small it goes unnoticed.

“…Yes.” I answered honestly.

His face dropped at the one word. He let his arms fall to his side. “I’m sorry for that. I wasn’t aware, and I never meant for that.” He said softly, his face showing slight guilt.

Liam Payne? Showing remorse? For his actions against me? What is this world coming to?

“I’m sure you didn’t.” I replied, my voice dripping with sarcasm. I will not fall victim to his fake sweetness.

He sighed heavily, clearly irritated. “Fine, whatever. Believe me or not. But we have work to do. Come with me.” He turns around and motions with his hand as he takes the path to the left of the stairs.

I followed him around the corner, down a long hallway, and through two windowed double doors, into what looks like a library.

It was very large and open, probably bigger than my house altogether. It was painted a dark, relaxing blue, and detailed in dark cherry wood, as well as the floors. The walls were mostly covered with bookshelves and every inch of them were packed tightly with books, both old and new.

There were wingback chairs set in pairs around the room, and in the very middle of the room, there was a large rug, with a Victorian style sofa, two wingback chairs on either side, all centered around a very antique, very expensive, coffee table.

It was only when I saw a staircase that I looked up to find there was a second story to the room. A balcony surrounding the entire room, it was also lined with books, and I spotted another door out into the upstairs area.

I must say, I was impressed. I had always dreamed of living in a home like this one. But I wasn’t about to admit that to Liam. He would only tease me about it.

I looked over to see Liam sitting down on the sofa. He looked at me and patted the seat next to him.

“Have a seat.” He said with a smile to no one, looking down at his books.

I approached him and sat down on one of the chairs, trying to make a point.

He started to flip through papers and books, looking for something in particular. He looked so calm, so focused.

So cute.

My eyes widened at my own thoughts.

Ah! No! What the hell? No, not this jerkoff. He is not cute. My mind is just playing games with me.

I smacked myself mentally.

What a fucking dork I am.

It’s not my fault that this guy was so charming without even trying.

“What are you looking for?” I asked quietly.

He plucked a piece of paper out of the rest of them and his face lit up in success. “Notes.” He held it up, proud of himself like a five year old.

What is with this guy? He always acts like he’s just it on a stick when he’s with his friends. Why is he being so… normal, now?

I nod my head slowly and purse my lips, looking at him like he’s an idiot. “Oh, you’re a nerd?” It came out as more of a statement.

He cocks his head to the side and furrows his brow, his bottom lip seemingly getting bigger. “I am not. I just, enjoy learning.” He says slowly.

“Yeah. You’re a nerd.” I repeat.

He rolls his eyes with a smile on his lips. “You don’t make it very easy for people to be nice to you, do you?” He inquires with a smirk.

I looked at him for a few seconds before a question rolls off my tongue. “Why are you being so nice to me?”

He looked into my eyes for a second, pausing. “Well, maybe I’m not a bad guy.” He says, keeping his smirk. “Maybe, you’ve only passed judgment on me based on my friends and not on me as an individual.” He finishes, never breaking eye contact.

I stayed quiet for a second, pondering his words. “Maybe. But if you really were a good guy, you would stick up for me. You wouldn’t let your friends treat me so horribly.” I stated, proud of myself.

He ran his fingers through his hair and threw his head back on the sofa. “Look, that part is complicated.”

“Oh, is it?” I asked sarcastically, anger growing in my voice.

Is he really trying to justify his friends’ behavior right now?

“More than you think, Eilana. But I can’t tell you.” His words were heavy with stress.

“Why? Has your master forbade you?” I teased, a smirk on my lips now.

“Look, Harry doesn’t control us, okay?” He seemed to be unaffected by my teasing.

I furrowed my brow in confusion at his lack of reaction. “Aren’t you going to tease me back? Call me poor? Pull my hair? Push me around? Call me degrading names?! Force yourself on me?!” I asked angrily, standing from my seat.

He looked at me confused. “No. I told you, I’m not the bad guy.” He stared at me a while longer and realization hit him. His eyes became sad and his brows knit together. “Does Harry do those things to you?”

I look at him, a tear threatening to fall down my burning cheek. I wasn’t going to attempt to speak right now. I was not about to cry in front of Liam Payne.

“Tell me, love, does he?” His eyes held what appeared to be sorrow as he waited for my answer.

I still didn’t respond, making fists as I failed to hide the water that’s building in my eyes.

Liam walked over to me and faster than I could protest, he wrapped his arms around me, rubbing my back sweetly. “I’m so sorry, love. I didn’t know he was that bad to you. I’m so sorry. You’re a nice girl and you don’t deserve this. I’m going to have a little chat with him. Trust me.” He cooed in my ear as he tried his best to comfort me.

I felt very awkward, being cradled by my own enemy. I was surprised at how gentle his touch was. Very different from Zayn or Harry, and every word from him sounded genuine.

“It’s okay, Eilana. I’ll make it better.” He promised me, his voice a soft, gentle whisper.

That was it. I lost it. He was the first that I told all this to. Louis knew that Harry picked on me obviously, but he didn’t know the details or how bad it was. But only because I knew he would rip Harry, and everyone around him, a new asshole.

I cried. I let it all out, and there was no stopping now. This had been building up for months. I was so damn emotional lately.

Liam swayed us side to side slowly, rubbing my hair softly. I didn’t care who I was hugging at the moment, I just needed to be hugged.

After a few minutes, I realized that I couldn’t do this. I couldn’t let my enemies get so close to me. I pushed back from him, wiping my tears with the back of my hand. “Why are you being so nice to me?!” I half yelled at him through my tears.

He laughed lightly at my anger in this moment and brushed away some of the hair stuck to my wet cheek. “Because, I know what a sweet girl you are. And because, I don’t know, I feel bad seeing you so hurt. It’s not right, and I don’t like it.” He scanned my face nervously, awaiting my reaction. When it didn’t come, he continued. “In all honesty, I’ve never agreed with the whole bullying thing. It’s wrong and I’m sorry I don’t stick up for you, but Harry does it for a reason. I’m not saying it’s okay, but I just want you to know that he’s not a heartless guy. He has a reason for it, he just goes about it the wrong way.” He finished, looking at me with a sympathetic expression.

“What do you mean?” I questioned him, now more curious.

Why do I feel as though I can trust him now? I shouldn’t. Not at all. So why am I finding it hard not to?

He sighed and sat down on the sofa once more. I followed behind him and sat on the other end of it.

“Well, he-He just gets frustrated. Because of the way you treat him, he gets frustrated and then he has a hard time controlling his actions towards you. He isn’t known for having the best temper, that boy.” He looked down at his hands and sighed lightly again.

“But I ignore him! It’s only when he bothers me that I get mad and am mean to him!” I retorted rather loudly, getting worked up again.

“Exactly.” Was all he said, looking at me with pursed lips.

I stared back at him, confused, but I let it go, not wanting to get into this right now. I don’t think I was going to get much more out of him anyway.

“Whatever. Can we just get this thing over with for tonight?” I asked tiredly, gesturing to the papers and such scattered everywhere.

He showed a small smile and leaned forward, taking an interest in it suddenly.

We got back to work and actually made quite a bit of progress. I had to admit though, the boy was smart.

After about an hour, he put everything down and leaned back, stretching his arms back. I didn’t fail to notice his shirt riding up.

What am I doing?!

I mentally slapped myself again, shaking my head slightly.

“I’m thirsty. You want something to drink?” He offered.

“That sounds good actually.” I nodded, trying to hide the slight blush on my cheeks.

We got up and he led me back through the hallway and past the staircase, down the other hallway and into the kitchen.

It was, not surprisingly, very large. It was painted bright red, with black granite counter tops and black marble flooring.

What is it with these people and marble? Just trying to showcase their money probably…

I noticed all the appliances were stainless steel, and the cabinets were all white. It was decorated in a very Parisian style, and there was a large island in the middle with four barstools. It was quite lovely, really.

“What do you want?” He asked, opening the refrigerator.

“What do you have?” I ask back, sitting on one of the barstools.

He poked his head out of the fridge for a second. “Everything.” He answerd before sticking it right back in there.

“Oh, um, I’ll take a soda.” I picked quickly, panicking suddenly.

He walked over and hands me a bottle of Pepsi, but not before opening it first.

“Thank you.“ I mumbled, not really wanting to say it.

We sipped in silence until Liam piped up.

“You know, we’re really not horrible guys. Niall is quite nice, really. And Harry is just, well, he’s dealing with some stuff right now. And Zayn, he’s just a little horny, but he’s a good guy once you get to know him.” He says, taking another sip of his Pepsi.

“A little?” I questioned rhetorically.

He gave me a weird look but didn’t question. “Maybe we can even be friends?” He sounded hopeful, squinting his eyes slightly.

I looked at him like he just suggested that I dive into a volcano. “How about no.” I said dryly, taking a swig of the delicious carbonation.

He laughed at my reaction to the idea and leaned over, putting his elbows on the counter. “Okay, maybe not. But me and you can be friends?” He tried again.

He received the same look from me. Chuckling, he gave up and stood tall again, showing off his broad chest. “Let’s get back to work then.” He trailed off, walking in that direction.

I followed him back and we worked until 10:00. Becoming a bit tired, he decided to wrap it up for tonight. “We’ll finish another time.” He said.

I nodded my head in agreement, standing up to meet him only at his shoulder. I hated being short. It made me feel weak. Although I didn’t feel threatened around Liam, I felt, comfortable.

“I guess I’ll see you then…” I trailed, walking to the door.

He followed behind and grabbed his coat, putting it on. “I’ll drive you home.” He said blankly. “And wear this.” He threw me an unfamiliar coat.

It looked similar to his. I held it out and looked at it. It was a men’s coat, but it was warm and it smelled like him. “Why?” I asked dumbly.

He gave me a puppy dog look. “Because it’s cold out there.” He said, grabbing his keys.

I didn’t say anything and put it around me as we walked to his garage. The six car garage.

How ridiculous.

He walked straight up to his dark purple, almost black Lamborghini, getting in. I followed quickly, buckling up.

“Are you sure? I can just walk home. It’s no big deal.” I tried to change his mind.

He smiled at me as he put it in reverse. “No problem. I want to. And besides, I’m not about to let a girl as pretty as you, walk home alone in the cold at night.”

I blushed at his statement and looked out the window as we drove away from his mansion.

~

I felt slightly embarrassed as we pulled up to my house. I thanked him and got out, not bothering to look at him. I started to take off the coat to give back to him but he got out of the car. I watched as he circled around the car to me.

“Um, here.” I hand him the coat and he takes it slowly, throwing it into his car and shutting my door.

He led me to my door like a gentleman, to my surprise. “Well, I’ll be seeing you around. Tomorrow I suppose. Good night.” He said quickly, taking me by surprise again when he kissed my cheek. But he walked away and got in his car before I could even recover and say anything.

Weirdo.

I walked into my house and straight to my room.

Looks like mom isn’t home again.

I decided to pull out my phone and text Louis. I haven’t talked to him since school this morning.

Lou-Bear

Hey Lou. Would you mind coming over tonight? Mom isn’t home and I’m feeling lonely. :( Also, I have something to tell you. xx

I wanted to talk to him. Maybe telling him all about this was the right thing to do.

As I laid there, thinking of how to word all of this to Louis, I felt myself drifting off before I could come up with anything decent.

Well, tomorrow is not going to be smooth sailing…

Chapter Text

I awoke to a loud crashing sound from another room. I jerked in shock at the sound, and then again at the sight before me. Louis was fast asleep in my bed.
How is he still asleep after all that commotion? And better yet, what is he doing in my bed?

I decided to go inspect where the noise came from first. I hopped out of bed and quickly made my way to the kitchen.

I saw my mom standing there, baking sheets and cooking utensils everywhere.

"Mom are you okay? What happened?" I asked, observing the mess before me.

She gave me a small smile and motioned to the things scattered on the floor. "Well, I was going to make you some of your favorite ginger bread cookies since I have the day off, but the cookie sheets were on top of the refrigerator and I didn't want to fool with the ladder and, well, you can see how that turned out..." She gave a small laugh.

My mom is short. Like, really short. At only five feet and one inch she had difficulty reaching things. I have a bit of the same problem considering that I'm not far behind at five feet five inches, but I could at least reach to the top of the refrigerator.

I chuckled along with her, shaking my head and beginning to pick up the fallen things and put them back in their place. I laid everything that she would need on the counter and made my way back to my room.

"Try not to start a fire while I get ready for school , okay mom?" I joked.

"I'll try not to." She replied, laughing at her clumsy self.

Upon entering my room, I sighed happily at the sight in front of me.

Louis was still sound asleep. That boy could sleep through the end of the world, but he looked adorable. He was clutching my pillow to him, curled up, with the covers kicked down to his ankles. His chest moved up and down slowly and peacefully as his face remained sweet and innocent.

I realized then that his shirt was nowhere to be found. I couldn't help myself staring though. Even though I felt a little creepy in doing so, he was asleep so I didn't see the harm in it. He would never know anyway.

Wow I sound like a creep. But why does he have to do this to me? Surely he must know just how hard it is not to stare creepily at his tanned body. Ugh.

He looked so peaceful laying there. Too bad.

I walked over and got on the bed, crawling towards him on my knees.

"Louis get your fat ass off this bed right now!" I raised my voice at him, rocking him back and forth violently.

He snapped awake and looked at me. When he saw my face he grinned happily. "Good morning, love!" He chimed at me, pulling me into a warm hug.

He then rolled over, pulling me with him back under the covers and back to sleep.

"Louis, I have to get up." I stated plainly.

"No!" He countered, snuggling into me.

"Louis, we have to get ready for school." I reminded him, inhaling his scent.

Why does he always smell so damn good? It's almost heavenly.

"Or, we could just stay here and snuggle all day." He suggested in the sweetest, most innocent voice he could.

Ignoring the fact that I would much rather stay here in his strong arms, I pried myself from his bare chest, only to see a look of displeasure on his adorable face. "As tempting as that sounds, Lou-Bear, I have to be responsible." I sighed.

He stared at me with pleading eyes, hoping to change my mind. After he realized I wasn't going to give in, a pout appeared and he sighed heavily. "Fine."

My expression changed suddenly into one of confusion as the thought reappeared in my mind. "What are you doing here anyway?"

"You asked me to come over last night, remember?" He asked back with an equally confused face.

I thought for a second before remembering the text that I had sent him in my state of exhaustion last night. I nodded my head slowly at the memory.

“You wanted to tell me something?” He encouraged, a sudden curiosity in his voice.

Yeah, no. I was not about to tell him what has been going on. Abort mission completely. This would not sit well with him.

“I did? I don’t remember having anything to tell you. I must have just been really tired. I got in pretty late last night, so…” I lied confidently. Well, it was partly true.

I got up and walked to my closet, looking through my clothes and trying to get away from the subject.

“Come on, Eilana. I know you have something to tell me.” He whined from the bed.

“Like what, Louis? I tell you everything.” It was true that I told him everything. This is the first time that has been a lie.

I heard him shuffling behind me as he got off the bed and walked over, wrapping his arms around me again.

His lips came up to my ear, and I shivered at his low voice. “I know that there’s something you’re not telling me. You’ve been hiding things from me recently, but I know.” He said, knowing in his tone.

My breath hitched in my throat at his statement, the green plaid miniskirt almost falling from my grip.

Did he really know everything? For how long? And why didn’t he say anything?

“You know what, Louis?” I asked, trying to sound confident and unfazed even though my voice was wavering.

“I know, that you were at Payne’s house until ten last night. I even know that he drove you home.” He revealed, not sounding too happy.

I relaxed underneath his arms, realizing that he wasn’t aware of everything after all.

“Were you spying on me, Tomlinson?” I accused jokingly, trying to cut some of the tension that was forming. I turned around and smirked at him. Although there wasn’t the usual small grin or mischievous smirk that usually adorned his face, this time it was blank, but with something behind his eyes. I couldn’t read his face at all, and I didn’t like it.

“I’m serious, Eilana. That’s dangerous. I know you two have to do this project together and all, but why did you go over there so late to begin with?” He asked, his tone a bit scolding.

The smile fell from my face, seeing that he was in no joking mood anymore. “Because he asked me to. And it was fine, nothing happened.” I replied calmly.

“It doesn’t matter if anything happened last night or not, it’s still dangerous. And what’s worse is that you-you got in a car with him! He could have taken you anywhere! He could have done something terrible to you!” He was getting more upset as the conversation went on.

“Louis, we were at his house all night! Alone no less! If he was going to do something, he would have done it there!” I was starting to get a bit annoyed myself.

“You were completely alone?! Eilana, that is not okay! Are you crazy?! You should have at least told me where you were! If something did happen to you, how would anyone know where you were?” He started to look more upset than anything now, a worried look in his eyes at the thought of what might have been.

“Clearly you didn’t have any trouble with that…” I muttered under my breath.

“What?” He asked sharply, not hearing me.

“Nothing. Look. I’m fine, okay? He didn’t do anything. So you can stop worrying about it.” I sighed, returning my attention to the clothes.

He let out a tired sigh. “Just promise me that next time you go over there, or anywhere that could be remotely dangerous, that you’ll tell me?” He pleaded, pulling me back into his chest.

“Yes, Louis. I promise. I’m sorry.” I hugged him back, letting him hold me for a while.

“I’m just worried, okay? I mean, this is Liam Payne we’re talking about. He’s not exactly on my trustworthy people list.” He sighed again, rubbing his face. He looked tired.

“Are you okay? You look like you didn’t get enough sleep.” I questioned, a little worried about him.

“I was up almost all night worrying something bad had happened to you. I didn’t want to wake you though, and you were already asleep when I got here last night. I just watched you for hours, terrible thoughts playing in my head. Of course I didn’t get enough sleep.”

I rolled my eyes playfully, chuckling at his level of worry for me over nothing. “Louis, you worry about me too much.”

He narrowed his eyes slightly, almost a hurt look in his eyes. “Do I? Because I feel like it’s needed.” His cold shoulder turned to me as he walked out quickly.

I was left standing there, absolute shock at what had just happened.

Did he really just leave? Seriously?

I scoffed to myself. Louis has never walked out on me before. He’s never really gotten mad at me before honestly. I didn’t even think he was that mad. He didn’t seem it anyway. I can’t believe this.

“Whatever.” I muttered to no one.

I pulled out my black sweater and pulled it on and over the top of my skirt, pushing the sleeves up. I grabbed my black thigh highs and sat down on my bed to put them on when Louis suddenly walked back in.

“I thought you left.” I stared at him awkwardly, confused at his reappearance.

He pulled a weird face and laughed. “Nooo, I just went to get this change of clothes from my car.” He explained, lifting up the clothes in his hand.

“Oh.” I said blankly, feeling like an idiot. “I thought you walked out on me. I thought you were mad.” I said quietly, then laughing at myself for thinking Louis would ever be so mean to me.

He sat down next to me, his face a kind of sad smile as he pulled me into a hug. “I would never leave you. I’ll always be right here.” He hugged me tighter, making me smile.

I looked down at the wad of clothes in his hand. “So you brought a change of clothes? Why?” I asked curiously.

“Yep! I’m going to drive you to school today!” He sounded like a proud five year old.

Holy damn, Louis. You adorable man, I just want to hug you to death.

I giggled at him and rolled my eyes.

He looked at the stockings in my hand and smirked. “May I?” He reached for them, a devilish look on his face.

“Uh, why? I’m perfectly capable of doing it myself.” I stated.

He pouted at me and got on his knees on the floor in front of me. He had already taken them from me anyway.

I looked at his begging eyes and gave in. “Fine.”

He smirked at my permission, happy that he had won. He took one and bunched it up, slowly sliding it up my leg. I could feel the heat already rising to my cheeks. I wasn’t used to all of these games he liked to play with me. He got all the way up to my thigh, slightly reaching under my skirt to push it up all the way. Then he started to put the other one on, sliding it up my leg at a painfully slow rate, trailing his warm fingers up my cold skin. His touch so light on my skin made me shiver. After letting it go, his hands continued up my thighs, a hand on each leg, still slowly snaking their way up. My breathing stopped as his hands disappeared under the cloth of my skirt.

He leaned forward and looked into my eyes, a smirk across his lips. This only increased the feeling of nervousness I had. It sent another chill up my spine, but I could feel my body getting warmer by the second. He was so close to my lips now, and I could feel his breath on my face. His hands still continued their work, and my eyelids fluttered shut in anticipation, but he stopped as he got to the top of my legs and smirked at me.

“It’s so easy to make you blush. You’re so innocent, it’s adorable.” He grinned cockily. And with that, he softly slapped my thighs and stood up, grabbing his clothes.

How can he do that? How can he go from being so sensual and serious, to being cheeky and childish in two seconds?

“Thought you were going to get something else out of that, eh? You naughty girl.” He wagged his finger at me and smiled that cheeky smile of his.

I flushed red again at his taunting. I tried to brush it off and put on my shoes. “Well, someone is feeling cocky today.” I joked at him.

I sat down at my vanity and brushed my hair. I was trying to ignore him getting dressed in the back of my mirror, but it wasn’t easy. He was trying to pull up his tight green skinny jeans, wiggling in hopes that it would make it easier.

His ass. His ass is so incredible. I really just want to-Wait. I have to get ready.

I swear I was almost drooling before I realized what I was doing and snapped out of it.

I finished putting on my makeup on when Louis walked over, putting his black denim jacket on over his white button up. He looked damn good.

“Ready to go, love?” He asked, a sweet grin on his lips.

“Yeppers.” I grabbed my phone and a few other things before grabbing Louis’ hand and leading him to the kitchen.

I sat down in front of the plate of breakfast my mother had cooked for me. As usual, there was way too much food for me.

She turned around at the sound of our shuffling, surprised to see Louis was here too. Although there was a bright smile on her lips at the sight. My mother adored Louis to pieces. I think she would adopt him if she could.

“Oh hello, Louis! I didn’t know you were here. If I had known, I would’ve made enough for you too.” She frowned slightly.

“It’s okay, mom, he can eat some of mine. There’s too much for me anyway.” I butted in, grabbing another fork and sliding the plate of food closer to Louis.

~

As I sat in class, bored without Louis’ presence, I drifted off to thoughts of this morning in the hall.

I had crossed paths with Niall. He only smiled at me, but the fact that he acknowledged me at all made me giddy. I had smiled back at him, although only for a short second as I could feel myself starting blush under his gaze.

But why am I feeling this way about him? I should hate him just like the rest of Harry’s pack. But then again, Liam said that Niall was actually quite nice. Wait, why should I listen to Liam? I don’t trust him either! …Right? Ugh. This is so confusing. Surely I don’t feel anything for these guys but hate. I need to get my emotions in order.

I was pulled from my argument with myself when I heard the sudden sound of the bell ring, dismissing class.

I gathered my stuff and made my way towards the door. I was approached by Olivia before I could go any further though. She was smiling annoyingly as always.

“Eilana!” Her screeching voice pierced my ears. “I heard you got to partner with Liam Payne! Is it true?” She gushed at me. I could barely make out what she said by the way she ran her words together.

“Uh, yeah. Not by choice though.” I replied dryly. Of course it would take something like this to get anyone in this school to talk to me.

“You are so lucky! I would kill to have that opportunity!” She practically squealed in my face.

“Mm, yeah. Well he’s not tha-“ I was cut short by her excited banter.

“I’m so jealous of you! It’s not fair! Why not me? Or anyone more deserving, really! Has he tried anything on you yet? Probably not. He’s too high on the food chain for you. He would never want to put his dick in something like that.” She said snobbishly, looking me up and down with a face of disgust.”

I simply raised my eyebrows at her rude remark. “Well, he’d never want to put his dick in such a rude bitch like you either. So I guess that makes us even. Bitch.” I forcefully pushed past her and out of the classroom.

“What’s up?” Louis’ voice rang in my ears as I neared my locker, bringing a sigh of relief from me.

“Not much. Just the same old bitches, saying the same old stuff. I haven’t run into Harry once today. I wonder if he’s even here?” I thought out loud.

Louis’ eyes narrowed slightly at the mention of him. “I hope not. I’ve had all I can take of that spoiled lil’ fucker.”

“Believe me, I know how it feels.” I shut my locker and began walking to lunch with Louis.

~

After sitting down at the usual table, Lily Monroe showed up and sat down next to him.

Oh fuck. Just kill me now. Please.

“Hi Louis!” She said way too loudly.

Louis just kind of wiggled his eyebrows at her, trying to acknowledge her existence so as not to be rude. But he hardly even looked at her before taking a sip of his drink.

I almost choked on my drink, trying not to laugh at her overly displeased expression at his reaction to her. Or rather, his lack thereof.

“So anyway, I was wondering if you wanted to come over tonight and work on the project some more? I can order pizza and we can make a party out of it! My parents are out for the rest of the week so we have the whole house to ourselves.” She rambled on in a very high pitched, annoying voice.

Louis looked at me with a weird, kind of save me face, before slowly replying. “Um, sure.”

“Great! I just love spending time with you!”

I think I’m going to be sick. Honestly, why don’t you just go ahead rub your boobs on his face while you’re at it? Do you hear yourself?

She and Louis wouldn’t stop talking after that. Well, more like she wouldn’t stop talking and poor Louis was stuck listening to her. I couldn’t get a word in at all. She was completely ignoring my existence. Literally.

About half way through lunch, I was already finished because of my lack of talking, and I didn’t think I could sit through this for another minute, so I told Louis that I was going to the restroom and left.

It was true that I had to go to the restroom though. I was just lucky enough to have an actual excuse to get out of that awkward hell.

After leaving the bathroom, I slowly made my way through the empty halls. Upon passing a four way crossing, I was cut in front of by Zayn, causing me to freeze up at the sight.

“Hello, Eilana.” He smirked at me cockily.

I am not going to let my fear control me this time.

“What do you want?” I asked in annoyance.

“You know what I want. But are you willing to give it to me?” He asked, stepping closer with a devilish smirk.

“You keep your nasty man-whore hands off of me, Malik.” I narrowed my eyes at him.

He scoffed at me and grabbed me by the jaw. “For such a goody two shoes, you sure do have a filthy little mouth. I’d watch it if I were you. That’s the kind of stuff that gets little girls into trouble.” He gripped my face harder in his hand, looking into my eyes with a dangerous glint in his own.

“Suck. My. Imaginary. Dick. You. Filthy. Dog.” I emphasized each word, smirking at him and feeling slightly empowered at the moment.

Damn my pride. I’ll never stay out of trouble if I can’t even learn to keep my mouth shut.

His eyes widened at the harsh words. He took in a sharp breath of air, nostrils flaring in rage. He grabbed me and shoved me into the lockers with great strength.

Ow.

It knocked all the breath of out me. I was disoriented when he grabbed me by the hair and yanked roughly, pulling my head back.

“What did you say you little bitch?” He breathed in my face, his teeth gritted in anger.

“Let go! It’s not enough that you’re a despicable scumbag, but now you have to be a pathetic abusive loser too? Have you absolutely zero dignity?” I taunted stupidly.

He slammed the back of my head into the locker again, harder this time.

“You don’t talk to me like that, bitch! I run this school! You respect me, and you give me what I want when I ask for it! I think you need to be taught a lesson!”

He picked me up and threw me over his shoulder with ease. He put me down in an empty classroom and shut the door, leaving the lights off. He turned around and pushed me over. I fell to the ground roughly and I felt a sharp pain in my wrist. I knew it was probably just a sprain though, as it happened to me all the time due to me being such a klutz.

He crawled over me and straddled me, grasping my wrists. He grabbed them harshly, sending another jolt of pain through the left one. I quietly whimpered at the pain and struggled beneath him, but he was heavy, and I wasn’t going anywhere.

He lightly slapped me in the face. It didn’t hurt, but it shocked me enough to get me to be still.

“Stop squirming.” His voice had a scary edge to it, and I immediately listened to him.

“Good girl. I promise you’re just making it worse for yourself. You would like it if you would just relax.” His voice softened with a mock sweet tone.

I lay there wide eyed and scared. I wanted to cry, but there was no way I was going to cry in front of him. I had a feeling he would get some kind of sick enjoyment out of it.

He leaned down and started to lick my neck slowly before roughly sucking on it and biting at the soft skin. It was so harsh and fueled by nothing but lust, and it disgusted me. I didn’t want this. This was it. I had no Niall to save me now. After what happened last time, I highly doubt he told anyone this time around. I was alone.

I tried to yell out as it was my only hope. But as soon as I opened my mouth, he slapped me again.

“Shut up!” He hissed at me, pressing his hand over my mouth.

I whimpered under his hand as he started to grind his hips into me. He let out a low groan at the friction. I could feel him growing harder through his jeans, and I felt the heat on my cheeks as I took it. What was I to do? He had a strong hold on me, and struggling got me nowhere.

His hand came down on my chest, grabbing me hard. I took the chance to shove him off of me now that my hands were free, and it worked. He lost his balance suddenly and rolled off of me at the force of my push. I quickly scrambled to my feet and shot out the door.

He was hot on my trail when I rounded the corner of the still empty halls and ran into Louis, who looked shocked to see me.

“Eilana. Where were you? I was looking for you. You said were going to the restroom, but you weren’t anywhere near it.” He studied me up and down as I panted, shaking and out of breath. “Are you okay, love?” He asked me, squinting slightly.

“Yeah! Yeah, I’m fine. I just, uh, thought I was late.” I swallowed hard, leaning into him as I hugged him, so happy to see him at the moment.

He gave a weird and confused face. “Class doesn’t start for another ten minutes.” He informed me, giving me a quizzical eyebrow.

“Oh. Uh, I must have read my phone wrong.” I lied quickly.

He stared at me for a while, unsure of what was wrong with me. “Right. Well I’ll see you after class then.” He hugged me back. “I’ve got to get to my locker. See you, love.” He waved as he trailed off.

I’m so grateful that he’s completely clueless sometimes.

I looked behind me, remembering that Zayn was right behind me, but I only found a blank hallway. Nothing. Not a soul in sight. It still managed to be eerie.

I cautiously made my way to my locker, rather paranoid the whole time. After shutting it, I spotted Niall across the hall. He was making his way through when a rowdy group of people accidentally shoved him my way. He looked at me and smiled, a hand on the back of his neck.

“Hey.” He greeted quietly.

“Hi.”

Wow. He looks really good today.

“Are you okay? You seem a bit shaken up.” He inquired.

It was true, I was still trying to get my breathing back to normal after that encounter.

“Um, I’m fine thanks.” I replied as casually as possible.

He raised an eyebrow at me and looked around a bit before continuing. “Right. Well, Harry isn’t here today. Just thought I would let you know. Maybe you can relax a bit now.” He chuckled, trying to make light of the situation.

Oh, Niall. If only it were that simple.

“Oh, thanks.” I gave him a small smile.

“Anyway, I guess I’ll see you around, yeah?” He sounded a bit, dare I say it, eager?

“Uh, y-yeah. Sure.” I tripped over my words.

He lightly chuckled and gave me his million watt smile before waving cutely and walking off.

Ugh. Why am I such a fucking dork around cute guys?

~

I kicked off my shoes in the living room, plopping down on the couch. My phone buzzed and I reached to the coffee table to get it.

Lou-Bear

Hey, wanna hang out a bit before I have to go spend the rest of my evening in hell at Lily’s? xx

I laughed lightly before typing back a response. Before I could finish, my phone rang. I looked at the screen to see who was calling.

Payne in the ass

Fucking great.

I sighed loudly to myself before answering.

"Hello?"

Hey! I was just calling to ask if we’re still on for working on the project tonight? I’ll provide dinner and everything.

Dinner? What the hell is up with this guy?

" …..Uh, sure. When do you want me to come over?"

Maybe… five thirty-ish? Sound good?

"…Sure."

Great! I’ll pick you up at five thirty then. See you later.

And with that, the line went dead.

He’s going to pick me up? What, was this a date?

I stared at my phone with a look of confusion before shaking my head and texting Louis back.

As much as I would love to, I have to be at Liam’s house in half an hour. There, I told you, okay? ;P I’ll be there until further notice. xx

I yawned and laid back into the seat as I waited for my phone to light up again.

Lou-Bear

Awwww! Fine. He’s a lucky boy, getting to spend so much time with you. I’m jealous. ;) I guess I’ll just catch you later then. Love you! Be safe! xx

I put my phone down, smiling to myself. I sat there repeating the day in my head. I shivered at the memories, some frightening and others awkward. Today had most definitely not been a good day. I had so many confused emotions in my head.

It seemed like it was only a few minutes before the doorbell rang and I answered the door to a smiling Liam.

“Ready?” He asked cheerily.

I nodded my head and locked up, following him out to his car.

~

When we got to his house, I noticed that it wasn’t empty this time. I could hear people talking from what seemed to be the direction of the kitchen. It almost sounded more like fighting. I looked at Liam questioningly.

“Mum and dad.” He replied flatly. His face seemed to fall a bit at hearing them.

I mouthed and ‘oh’ and straightened out my sweater nervously, at both his parents being here and also how his whole mood seemed to change at the sound of their voices.

“Let’s go to my room. It’s the only quiet place in this house when there’s people here.” He gestured for me to follow him.

I trusted him enough at this point. With my life? No. Enough to know he wouldn’t pull a Zayn on me? Yes.

I followed him up to his room. Up the stairs and down a long hall, around a corner and down another hallway, all the way in the back, was a dark purple door.

Hm. He must like purple or something.

He turned to me with and smiled shyly. “Purple is my favorite color.” He scratched the back of his head before laughing nervously and opening the door.

I was immediately overwhelmed by his scent. The room was surprisingly clean for a teenage boy. It was also surprisingly simple compared to the rest of the house.

He had gray walls and black floors. His bed was giant with lots of pillows and was all decorated in different shades of purple, gray, and black. It was very big and spacious, probably a little bigger than my living room, with a big white rug in the middle of it. There was a dresser with a mirror and a desk with a very expensive looking laptop sitting on it, as well as a black chaise lounge on the along the wall, and a small coffee table in front of it. All of the furniture was a matte black or white color, with glass pull knobs and pops of blue all around the room.

“Nice room.” I commented quietly.

“Thanks.” He smiled, sitting down on the couch.

I took a seat next to him, not caring much about acting so coldly to him anymore, and pulled off my coat, laying it on the other side of the chaise.

“Um, I hate to bring this up, but…” He started.

“Bring what up?” I encouraged him when he paused.

“Uh, I know what happened today. With… Zayn, I mean.” He said hesitantly.

I drew back in slight shock.

Well, I certainly wasn’t expecting that.

“You knew?!” I spat angrily.

“I didn’t know at the time! He only told me after school…” He hung his head.

I felt myself blush at the thought of Liam imagining me like that. I looked to the floor in embarrassment.

“I’m really sorry. I wish I would have been there to help you. I never thought Zayn would go that far, honestly.” He looked so guilty even though it wasn’t his fault at all.

I sighed lightly and leaned back on the couch. “It’s not your fault, it’s my fault.” I corrected him.

I felt hot so I pulled my hair up with the hairband that was always around my wrist as Liam piped up at my comment.

“It is not your fault! It’s my fault! I should have been more careful. If I had-Oh wow.” He interrupted himself mid-sentence.

“What?!” I asked him in panic when he didn’t say anything, just stared at me with wide eyes.

“Uh… you’re not going to be happy about this. You might want to take a look in the mirror.” He pointed at the reflective surface over his dresser.

I jumped up quickly and ran over to it, examining myself. When I saw it, I was instantly pissed.

What. The. Actual. Hell.

There was a giant purple hickey on my neck. It was like a neon billboard, you couldn’t miss it when my hair was up.

My hands formed tight fists, my teeth gritted, and my eyes narrowed into thin slits.

Malik!

Chapter Text

Malik!" I screamed, horrified by the size of this thing on my neck.

I reached down to touch it, withdrawing my hand as I winced in pain.

Lovely.

I turned to Liam, my eyes like saucers as I pointed to the bruise on my neck.

“Yeah, that’s going to be sore for a little while.” He gave me a sympathetic look.

“Well what am I supposed to do about it?!” I raised my voice, freaking out. I couldn’t let anyone see this.

“You just have to keep it covered and wait it out.” His face was timid, eyes squinted slightly.

I sighed loudly and shut my eyes for a few seconds before trudging over and sitting back down next to him. “Liam, what am I going to do? What if Louis sees this? What am I supposed to tell him?” I asked worriedly.

“Tell him it was some random guy?” He suggested like it was believable.

I looked at him like he was an idiot. “Because that’s totally believable, right? What with all the guys dropping at my feet. I just don’t know how I could make it through life without my trusty stick to beat them all off with.” I joked sarcastically. “Besides, you obviously don’t know me very well. It’s not like I’m the type to just make-out with some random guy at a party or something. I don’t even go to parties.”

Liam chuckled at my joking earlier and then gave me a stern look. “Now, now, Eilana. You’re a beautiful girl, don’t talk like that. I’m honestly surprised they’re not piling up at your feet. I’ve only gotten to know you a small bit, and even though you’re not the nicest to me, I can still tell that you’re an amazing girl.” He smiled softly and patted my knee before continuing. “I can’t imagine how awesome you really are once someone gets to know you. Louis is a lucky guy.” He stated with a smirk.

I smiled and put my head down, hoping to hide some of my blush.

He leaned forward, gently inspecting the love bite on my pale skin. He barely brushed it with his thumb when I pulled away from him in slight pain. I leaned back on my bad wrist, forgetting about it completely. I sat back up quickly, clutching it gently.

Liam looked very worried, watching me curiously. “Are you okay?” His voice was low but demanding.

“I’m fine.” I replied quickly, holding my wrist away from him. Just out of instinct really. I wasn’t exactly used to such gentle treatment from his kind. His kind being spoiled rich kids who picked on me, of course.

“Oh come now, let me see.” He persisted, reaching for my hand.

I backed up completely from him, my eyes were wide and I found myself terrified again. I didn’t want anyone else grabbing my wrists right now. It’s not that I didn’t trust him, I just wasn’t comfortable with it at the moment.

Fucking Zayn. I hate him!

Liam appeared hurt by my reaction to him. He furrowed his brow in sadness, a small frown on his lips. “I’m not going to hurt you, Eilana. I just want to make sure you’re alright. Is that okay? I just want to see your arm, you could be really hurt.” He moved closer to me and slowly reached for my hand again, staring into my eyes cautiously the whole time.

I let him touch me, but winced slightly at the contact. He stopped, before getting my silent approval to continue.

He lifted my arm to him as gently as possible. Slowly running his fingers over it and lightly pressing on it, he carefully examined it. It didn’t hurt though. He looked into my eyes again, interlocking his fingers with mine, and slowly rotating my wrist. I whimpered loudly as I felt the pain shoot through it again, and I blushed, both at the fact that I was such a child about pain and the fact that this moment seemed a little intimate.

He stopped immediately. “Sorry.” He apologized. “It’s just a sprain, but I would refrain from using it too much. Don’t lift heavy things with it and it should be fine in a few days. At least it’s not a bad one.” He shrugged softly.

I scrunched my nose at the lingering pain. “How do you know that just by touching it?” I asked, intrigued at this random knowledge of his.

He smiled at me sweetly and softly rubbed over the pained area in a massaging way, making the pain subside. “My dad’s a doctor. He’s got a couple different degrees in different areas, so I’ve picked up on quite a few things.”

We stared at each other in silence for a second. “But are you okay? I mean, from this morning? Zayn must have been really rough on you to cause this much evidence.” He said, dropping his gaze to my wrist again. The pain had long gone away, but he didn’t stop rubbing it. Not that I was complaining. It felt amazing.

I swallowed hard at the slowly building tension in the room. “I’m fine, I told you.” I lied.

“Eilana, you can tell me. I’m here for you, I promise.” He encouraged softly, pulling me into him.

I stiffened at the close contact, feeling uncomfortable and awkward. He looked down at me with his chocolate brown eyes, a frown on his face. “Tell me, love, are you really okay? I won’t be able to sleep tonight knowing that you could be suffering alone.” He begged.

I took a sharp breath in and stared straight ahead at nothing. “Honestly? No. I’m terrified. I can’t believe I’m telling you this, but, I really just want to cry. I don’t know how to deal with this. What if he doesn’t stop? What if I don’t get away next time?” I asked more to myself than to Liam.

The more I thought about it, the more frightening it was and I sat up quickly in fear, but Liam kept a firm grip on me, pulling me back down into him. Shushing me sweetly, he tucked some of my hair behind my ear and gave me a warm smile.

“I’m not going to let him hurt you ever again. I promise. I’ll take care of everything, don’t you worry.”

I started to choke up at his reassuring words.

Why is he being so kind to me? And why does he seem to care so much about me? He barely knows me.

“I can’t believe I’m saying this to you of all people, but thank you.” I told him quietly.

He smiled a bright smile and hugged me again. “For such a sweet innocent girl, I would be more than happy to protect you. You’ve done nothing to deserve this.”

I couldn’t help it when the smallest smile crept onto my face at his words. I laughed lightly to myself and looked at him. “You’re a hugger aren’t you?” I grinned at him.

“Why yes, I do quite enjoy a good hug.” He beamed at me. “I hope, maybe, we can put our personal past behind us and be friends?” He asked, a shy smile on his face.

…Why the hell not? I think he’s proven himself trustworthy. And I can’t help but feel that he’s genuine. I’m comfortable around him. I think he deserves a chance.

“We can try. But you only get one chance, Liam. There are no do-overs. If you break the small hair of trust that you’ve gained with me, that’s it.” I warned, trying to sound more unaccepting of the idea than I really was.

Why am I doing this?

Liam grinned at me happily and wrapped me in another hug. “I promise I’ll be good. You can trust me.”

Okay, he was a super good hugger. I’ll give him that.

Suddenly the door to his bedroom burst open and slammed shut again as a very angry looking Niall storms through it, already ranting loudly about something.

He paced back and forth in front of the door, not even bothering to look up once. “Can you believe Zayn?! What the hell was he thinking?! What if he really hurt her?! Ooooh!! I’m actually going to shove his disrespectful ego right up his ass!” He took his snapback off and ran his fingers through his hair. Breathing heavily, he wasn’t appearing to calm down at all. He certainly hadn’t noticed me yet.

Liam cleared his throat loudly. “There are ladies present.” He gestured to me, making me giggled lightly.

Niall finally turned around and took notice, his eyes growing wide at the sight of me. His cheeks were flushed from anger and his hands formed fists, but he relaxed a bit upon seeing me. “Oh, I’m sorry. I didn’t realize you were here, Eilana.” He dropped his eyes to the floor, taking off his snapback again and scratching his head.

“Obviously.” I giggled. “I take it you know what happened too?” I asked him, playing with the hem of my sweater.

He looked up at me, a sympathetic look on his features. “Yeah, he told me after school. Lil’ bastard…” He mumbled to himself.

I looked at Liam who didn’t look very pleased at all. His face was sporting a more serious expression than I had seen before. “He told you too, huh?” He pursed his lips into a tight line and looked around.

The room was silent as we all exchanged glances. The air was growing thick with Liam’s anger. He finally got up and walked towards the door, stopping as he gripped the knob. “I’ll be right back. I have to make a call. Niall keep her company, alright?” and with that he slammed the door shut.

I eyed Niall, who was looking at me. He scratched the back of his neck and made his way over to me. “Mind if I sit down?”

“N-Not at all.” I said barely above a whisper. I was nervous again. He had that effect on me, yet he made me feel so calm at the same time.

He sat down rather close to me, clearing his throat. “Are you okay?” He asked softly, resting his elbows on his knees.

“Um, well, it depends I guess…” I trailed off, not really wanting to discuss this with Niall.

He sighed lightly and took my hand gently between his own and looked at me in the eye. “Eilana, are you okay, or are you not?” He stroked my the top of my hand with his thumb. It made me relax.

“Do you really care?” I asked, staring at our tangled up hands.

He sighed, looking around and turning more towards me, coming closer. “Of course I do. I know you and I haven’t had the most friendly history, and I’m not proud of it, I wish I could go back and stand up to Harry all those times. I was just being a coward, and I realize that now. But I’m not going to be like that anymore. I know we don’t exactly know each other very well, but it doesn’t matter. I’m going to do the right thing from now on, and that includes keeping you out of harm’s way.”

“Is this some kind of joke?” I questioned him, starting to get angry at the thought of him messing with me like this.

He laughed at my suddenly stern face. “No. I promise, I want to help you. You seem like a really sweet girl, and I don’t think all of this horrible treatment you’re getting is fair. Please just let me help you?” He begged, a goofy grin on his face.

I remained silent at his words, hardly believing what I just heard.

All of this is so weird. Suddenly, two guys that have been on my enemies side this whole time want to help me against them? That just doesn’t happen. But they seem so sincere! Ugh. I can’t help but to trust what they say. But maybe it’s just their charm…

“How do I know I can trust you?” I eyed him suspiciously.

His face faltered a bit at my question. “Well, you don’t. I just hope you can trust me when I say, I will never tease you, or hurt you. I only want to make sure you get treated with the respect and kindness that you deserve. You seem like a very good person, and I hope I get a chance to know you better.” He said, appearing completely serious.

I stay silent once more, just looking at him. “Okay. I think I can trust you. And… thank you.” I averted my gaze to the floor again, hiding my face.

A huge grin appeared on his face, eyes twinkling. He was practically exploding with happiness at the moment.

His eyes are amazing. And his smile. His smile just makes me want to cuddle him forever. How can I not trust this guy? He’s harmless. He’s gotta be.

“Now, are you okay? Tell me the truth.” He said seriously.

I sighed heavily and closed my eyes, not wanting to talk about this anymore. A short flashback of Zayn’s rough ways upsetting me again.

Not now.

I could feel the heat rising to my cheeks, and the water collecting in my eyes. This whole thing was both embarrassing and terrifying. I snapped my eyes open to be met with Niall’s soft blue ones.

“No, I’m not.” My voice came out shaky. I wasn’t expecting that. I dropped my head again, only for it to be picked up by Niall’s fingers.

“I’m sorry.” He looked into my eyes, a very sad expression on his face. “I’m so sorry.” He repeated. He slowly pulled me into a hug. “I know you’re upset and scared. Just let it all out. It’ll make you feel better.” He spoke slightly above a whisper as he rubbed my back in small circles. It reminded me of Louis a bit.

At that moment, I let it all out. Everything. All the feelings I’ve had for Louis, all the anger I felt towards Zayn and Harry, the fear I went through every day, the kindness that Liam and Niall were showing me, the pain my father put mother and I through, and all the confusion I had about everything. I cried it all out onto Niall’s shoulder.

“It’ll be okay, Eilana. I promise. I’m going to help you through this, okay? And Liam too. If you need someone to talk to, you just talk to us, okay?” He continued to hug me, even after I had stopped crying, which was a solid five minutes.

“Thank you, Niall. You were right, I do feel much better.” I gave him a small smile, and he returned it.

“Good. Now, I don’t ever want to see you cry again. It’s heart breaking. I don’t like seeing it, so no more, okay?” He said, wiping a tear from my cheek.

He made me feel so safe, and like everything was going to be okay. He knew how to comfort me. And even though I didn’t really know him, it felt like I’d known him a lifetime. It might sound cheesy to the max, but, it was true.

Out comfortable silence was interrupted by the door opening and slamming shut again. This time Liam stood in front of it, running his fingers through his hair. He didn’t look any happier than when he left.

“Everything alright, mate?” Niall asked him, concern clear in his voice.

“Harry isn’t doing well. Things are just getting worse for him. I don’t know how this is going to end up for him in the future.” Liam replied, glancing at me.

Niall’s face dropped, and I just looked confused. I wanted to ask, but I know it’s not my business.

Liam eyed me, looking hesitant to speak, but he continued to anyway. “He’s coming over.”

My eyes shot back up to him. “Over here?” I asked, shocked at the sudden news.

Well that’s not that surprising I guess. I mean, Liam is one of his best friends.

Great. Now I probably sound like an idiot for asking that question.

“Um, yeah. Sorry. We’ll study another night I guess.” Liam said. “He’s just going through some bad stuff again, and he doesn’t have anywhere else to go right now.” He was obviously worried for his friend.

“There’s always Zayn’s house… I mumbled a little louder than I had intended.

“He’s not home right now. He’s at a party, which is why he didn’t answer when I tried to call him earlier. And anyway, he probably doesn’t have a clue what’s going on right now.” Liam answered. “But look, about this problem with Zayn.” He sat down on the other side of me. “Don’t worry. Niall and I will talk to him, okay? We’ll make sure he doesn’t mess with you.” He patted my back softly, giving me a reassuring grin.

I nodded my head faintly. “Thank you. I really mean it. You guys don’t have to help me at all, but you’re doing so much for me. Thank you.”

“No problem, Eilana.” Liam spoke back, hugging me shortly.

“I would go to Louis about this stuff usually, but something tells me he wouldn’t react the same level headed way that you guys do.” I laughed lightly.

They both gave me a smile and a hug. Niall was the first one to speak up. “I’m going to make a safe guess and say that you don’t want to be here when Harry gets here.” He raised his brow at me.

I giggled at him and his silly face. “You would be right about that.”

“That’s what I thought. Let’s get you home.” Niall stood from the chaise and held his hand out to me.

Taking it, I stood up and grabbed my jacket, slipping it on and taking my hair down. I noticed Niall eyeing the mark on my neck a few times, but he never asked. He probably knew where it came from anyway.

Liam got up as well. “Have you got her then?” He asked.

“Yeah, I don’t mind. You need to be here for Harry. I’ll come back when I drop her off.” Niall replied.

“I can just walk home, honestly. It’s not that late, and as much as I hate Harry, you need to be here for him.” I told Niall.

“Nonsense! I’m taking you home. It’s not safe for you to be walking around at any hour. Do you do that often?” He asked with a quizzical face.

I looked from side to side. “Uh, yeah. I kind of don’t have a car, so…”

“Well stop. It’s not safe, okay? If you need to get somewhere late at night, you call one of us, okay?” He stated more than asked. He gripped my upper arm gently and led me towards the door. “I’ll be back in a few.” He said before opening the door and dragging me through it.

“It’s really okay, you know? I can just walk h-“

“No. Absolutely not. I don’t like the idea of it. You’re a girl. A tiny girl, no less. And I’m a big strong man, it’s my job to make sure you get home safely.” He joked, flashing me a cheesy smile.

I couldn’t help but giggle at his overdramatizing everything. “I just feel bad.” I stated honestly.

He opened the door to the house for me. “Well don’t. It’s my pleasure to escort a fine young lady home.” He smiled, following me out and getting into his dark orange Ferrari.

“Nice car.” I complimented as I buckled up.

“Thanks. I got it for my birthday last month.” He smiled, wiggling his eyebrows. “My other one is in the shop right now, so I’m stuck with this one currently.”

My eyes widened upon hearing him. “You have two cars? Aren’t you only seventeen?”

“Yeah. I couldn’t decide, but they agreed to get me this one for my next birthday, and they did.” He said, sounding nonchalant about it.

Holy hell.

I pulled out my phone and texted Louis.

I’m almost home, so feel free to come over whenever. I’ll leave the door unlocked for you. xx

When we pulled up to my house, he opened the car door for me and leaned against the car. “I’ll see you tomorrow I guess. And don’t worry about dumbass. Like I said, I’ll talk to him.” He shoved his hands in his pockets.

“Which one?” I joked.

He laughed at my lame joke. “Malik. He could use a good beating as well.” He scowled.

“Please don’t.” I cringed. The thought of friends fighting because of me makes me feel bad. Even if it is Zayn.

“I’m not promising anything.” He smirked. “Are you sure you’re going to be okay?” He asked again. He looked concerned, glancing back at my empty house.

“Yeah, I’ll be fine, thank you. Louis is coming over.” I told him, immediately regretting it. I wish I had left that part out.

I hope he doesn’t think something is going on between Louis and I.

Wait, is something going on between me and Louis? Ugh. I don’t have time for this right now.

“Okay. Well, night.” He said, looking a little disappointed.

He waited until I got into my house to leave. I kicked off my shoes and dropped my coat on the couch, walking to my room. I plopped down on the bed face first and just laid there.

Maybe things will get better, and then Louis will never have to know. I would hate to send him into worry overdrive. There’s no need for that.

I wonder what’s wrong with Harry…

~

Harry’s P.O.V

I parked the car in front of Liam’s house. I ran my fingers through my hair as I sat there thinking over what just happened to me.

I just need to talk to Liam. He’ll know what I should do.

“Get it together, Harry. You’ll work through this. It’s not like it’s the first time this has happened.” I spoke to myself.

But it’s never been this bad before.

I pushed my subconscious to the back of my mind and looked into the rearview mirror. I ran my fingers over the cut on my brow, and down over my split lip. I could already see the bruises forming along my face. My eyes darted down to the splits on my knuckles.

I took in the biggest breath I could, and let it out quickly, not too fond of my sharp pain in my ribs. I turned the car off and got out. I made my way through the house like usual and stopped at Liam’s door. I took another breath and tried to pull myself together. I opened the door to see Liam on his bed, guitar in hand. I watched him jump up and put the guitar down quickly as he saw me walk in.

“Harry, mate, are you alright? You look pretty roughed up. It’s a lot worse than I thought.” He walked over to me, inspecting my face.

“I’m alright, I just need to sit down. My head is still pounding.” I made a straight line for his couch and laid down.

“Are you sure you’re okay? Can I get you anything?” He asked me.

Always the worried one.

I chuckled to myself, feeling a sharp pain go through me. I immediately stopped laughing, and started coughing instead. Liam looked at me, obviously worried again. “Don’t worry so much. You act like this has never happened before.” I smirked at him, hiding just how much this was affecting me.

He raised his brows and let them fall. “Right. Niall will be over soon, by the way.” He said.

I nodded my head carefully, and groaned at the aching pain that wouldn’t leave my body. “On second thought, could you get me some painkillers? They offered them to me at the hospital, but I declined. I was too worried about mum at the time.” I slurred at him.

“Yeah sure, mate.” He scurried off.

I hope mum is feeling better.

Why did she have to go and do this again?

I picked my head up and banged it repeatedly on the sofa in frustration. I squeezed my eyes shut, hoping that somehow I could block out reality. It didn’t work. I felt a warm liquid dripping slowly towards my brow, but ignored it.

I heard Liam come back into the room. I didn’t bother to look though.

“Here you go. Harry you’re bleeding!” He exclaimed.

Like I didn’t know that.

“Yeah.” I replied boredly. I swallowed the tiny pills with the water he brought me.

“Here.” He said, handing me a small hand towel. It was warm and damp.

I sat up and wiped my forehead, inspecting the blood on the cloth.

Hm. A lot more than I thought.

“So, how is your mum doing?” He asked hesitantly.

“She’ll be alright I guess. The doctor said she’ll have to stay for a few days. She’s malnourished and sickly to top it all off. Damn anorexia… I responded sadly, looking at the floor.

“I’m sorry, man.” Liam patted me on the back. Thankfully I didn’t have any injuries there.

The door opened and Niall walked in. His eyes became giant when he saw my face.

“Are you okay?!” He rushed over to me, looking at my bruised and bloodied face.

“I’ve been better.” I chuckled lightly, trying to lighten the mood a little. More for myself than for them.

“So what exactly happened?” Niall asked, crossing his arms in an interested manner.

“Well, in a nutshell, mum went out and had another one night stand. But this time, it was with one of dad’s friends. She was still drunk when she walked in this morning. Her alcohol problems have come back again as well. Dad obviously wasn’t happy about any of this, so he beat her, worse than he ever has. I walked in on it and tried to stop him like usual, but she was already unconscious and he was angrier than I’ve ever seen. We got into it and he absolutely slugged me. I actually had a hard time holding my own against him this time. But I won’t lie, eventually it just came down to him beating me. He finally stopped beating me left the house without a word.” I in a deep breath and sighed, leaning back on the couch again.

“Wow. That’s rough. I’m sorry.” Niall didn’t even sound surprised. He was used to hearing these things from me I suppose.

“Yeah, well, my family is a bit fucked up like that.” I stared at the ceiling.

I continued telling them about the lovely day I had. “So now, mum is in the hospital, and Gemma is on her way back from Paris to see her. I don’t know how dad is going to react to seeing her after she ran away from home and all. I don’t even know where dad is, but I’m sure he won’t be home for a few days. So, yay for that I guess.” I said flatly. “It’s just worse than it’s ever been. Why can’t I have a normal family like you guys?”

They exchanged sympathetic glances and looked back at me.

“It’ll be alright, mate. Eventually, things will be normal again.” Liam tried to cheer me up.

I laughed sarcastically and let my head fall to the side. “Yeah, and then mum or dad will just fuck up again!” I raised my voice, some of my still pent up anger getting the better of me for the moment.

They both gave me sorry faces, not knowing what to say.

“Hey, how is Eilana doing by the way?” Did you see her today?” I asked curiously.

They gave each other a strange look. Niall was he first that decided to say something.

“Yeah, she seems to be doing well. I think Zayn has been giving her trouble though.” He told me, awaiting my reaction.

I knitted my brows together. “Zayn? But he hasn’t mentioned anything to me about it.” I said, waiting for some explanation.

Liam looked as though he was hiding something.

“Spit it out! This is Eilana we’re talking about! I need to know!” I practically yelled.

“Well, that’s just it. He’s been doing it behind your back.” He rubbed the back of his neck nervously, knowing what was about to come. But, it didn’t. I was much too tired and in pain to react appropriately.

“That fucking asswad. I’m going to deal with him later. He’s dead wrong if he thinks he can go after Eilana and get away with it. He’s knows that she’s off limits. His ego is too big.” I closed my eyes, becoming more and more tired by the second. “Liam, would it be okay if I just crashed here tonight? I don’t really feel like going home…” I trailed sleepily. I’ve had the shit kicked out of me and been at the hospital all day. I don’t remember the last time I was this tired.

“Yeah, sure thing, man.”

“I guess I’ll head home then.” Niall started. “I hope you feel better, man. And I hope you’re mum gets better as well.” He gave me a sloppy handshake after Liam and left quietly, looking sullen after all this.

Everything seemed to blur out around me as I let the sleepiness take me. I curled up into myself on the couch, a million things on my mind at the moment.

I hope Eilana is okay. I’m going to beat the ever living shit out of Zayn if he touched her. He fucking knows he’s not allowed, that bastard.

Niall and Liam seem like they’re hiding something from me about her too, though. I wonder what they could know that I don’t…

Chapter Text

"Louis! We're going to be late! You look fine!" I shouted at him from the kitchen. He was getting ready in my room since slept over again last night.

He walked into the kitchen and kissed me on the cheek, wrapping his arms around me. "But my hair won't lay right." He sulked with his bottom lip sticking out comically.

I rolled my eyes. "Louis you look hot. Now stop making me say it."

He smiled cheekily and grabbed his piece of toast, pulling me towards his car.

When he got here last night, he must have spent thirty minutes talking about what hell it was to be stuck with Lily for so long. Apparently the last thing that was on her mind was working on the assignment. He said he couldn't wait until the project was over and done with so he could go back to avoiding her. It made me feel a little better knowing he felt that way. For now at least.

When we got to school, Louis took my hand as we walked in. I pulled it back quickly, looking at him strangely. "Louis, you can't hold my hand here." I told him quietly.

He looked a bit hurt, but listened to me anyway.

We parted ways for the first time today as we headed to our classes. I was slightly sulking at the loss of my best friend. I had become more attached to him these last few days. I didn't like being away from him for too long. I was becoming greedy about him, but I didn't care. I needed him. He was my only comfort.

~

As I was walking the hall later, I was grabbed by the shoulder firmly, stopping me in my tracks. I turned around to see a very unhappy looking Zayn.

"Can I talk to you?" He asked calmly.

I could feel myself shaking. I tried to seem as confident as my body would let me, but I was always a terrible actor.

"I don't think so. You've got another thing coming if you think I'm going to go anywhere with you." I replied surprisingly strongly.

He smirked at me and wrapped his long fingers around my arm tightly. "Well, you don't have much of a choice."

Terrified and flustered, I let him drag me somewhere outside of the school.

As soon as he saw that there was no one around, he wasted no time and slammed me into the brick wall behind me. "So, thought you would go crying to someone about how I treat you, huh?!" He breathed in my face. His eyes were wide and filled with anger. "Answer me, bitch!" He grabbed me by the hair again. I was having flash backs.

Please don't slam my head.

I couldn’t bring myself to speak, scared into silence by his behavior. He clenched his fist tighter, pulling the hair grasped in it harder. He leaned towards my ear and put his lips to it, and with a voice so low and laced with danger it gave me chills the moment he spoke. "If you don't answer me right now, I will drag you all the way back to my house and make sure you get treated like the bad little girl you are. And that includes things that even a dirty slut like you wouldn’t like. Painful things." He growled so low between his clenched teeth I could barely hear him.

All it took was his words and I could feel the water pooling in my eyes. "I-I-I'm sorry I-"

"Oh, you're sorry?! Well, that makes everything okay, doesn't it?" He snapped at me.

The tears escaped from my eyes as I tried to talk my way out of this. "Please! I'm s-sorry!" I begged him.

"You're not sorry! You wouldn't have done it in the first place then! And my own two best friends.” He shook his head slowly with a smirk that turned the very pit of my stomach. “How very dirty of you to rat me out."

I couldn't form words. His grip on me softened all together, surprising me. He leaned into me, putting his lips to my neck. "And here I thought we were having so much fun together. Why would you tattle on me? You just wanted more attention, didn't you? Is mine not enough? I can make you feel so much better than Niall or Liam ever could." He brushed his lips along my neck.

I was frozen scared. My eyes were shut tight and my fists were clenched. But the sudden absence of his body caused me to open my eyes, only to be embraced by Liam. I was so confused, but I hugged him back anyway.

"It's okay. We're here now. He's not going to hurt you, it's okay." Liam whispered softly to me as he held me tightly while I sobbed into his shirt quietly.

I heard a lot of yelling and loud noises coming from behind me. I turned my head slightly to see Niall on top of Zayn. They were on the ground and Niall was beating Zayn's face repetitively.

I let out a shriek, only to be shushed by Liam. He turned my head back around and hugged me tightly again. "It's okay. Niall will handle it." He assured.

I tried to free myself from Liam's arms, but it was proving a harder task than I had thought. "Liam! Stop him! He's going to get hurt!" I raised my voice at him.

He chuckled lightly, trying to keep a hold of me. "He'll be alright, he's an Irishman. That's what they do. Fight."

"No! Liam make him stop! He's going to kill him!" I cried loudly.

Liam just held my head to his chest and rubbed my back soothingly. I finally stopped squirming and gave up. "Are you okay?" He looked down at me.

"Yes. I'm fine." I replied shakily. I was holding Liam closer to me than appropriate, shaking into his solid frame.

"What did he do to you to get you so shaken up?" He asked more to himself than to me.

"He was just threatening me. I'm okay, just scared."

Liam just shook his head in understanding. He put his hands over my ears, trying to block out all the horrid sounds coming from what I hoped was still Niall beating Zayn, and not the other way around. Judging by Liam's face, my suspicions were confirmed, allowing myself to relax a bit.

After a few minutes, Liam removed his hands and let me go slowly. I turned around to see Niall coming towards me, Zayn nowhere in sight.

Niall stopped in front of me to inspect me. "Are you alright?" He asked almost too fast to understand him.

"She said he only threatened her. But judging by her emotional state, I would say there's something she's not telling us." Liam answered before I could.

Niall pulled me into a tight hug. His skin was on fire. It was freezing outside and he was burning up.

"Niall, are you okay? You're burning up!" I pulled away from him, shocked at the sudden heat.

"I'm fine. Just a little worked up I guess." He answered nonchalantly.

"Where did Zayn go?" I asked curiously.

"Oh I let him go. I didn't want to, but, I'm pretty sure he's had enough for now. Something tells me that won't be the only beating he's getting today." Niall smirked at his victory. "He won't mess with you again. He's knows now."

"Knows what?" I asked with a furrowed brow.

"That I won't be so easy on him next time. A.k.a, I'll kill'em." He said seriously.

I just widened my eyes at the statement. I subconsciously leaned into Liam as he hugged me from the side again. Niall's eyes wandered to Liam's hands, narrowing slightly.

"I'm kidding of course. But I will put him in the hospital." He said, eyes never leaving the other boys hand placement on my waist.

"How did you guys find me?" The thought only now popping into my head.

Liam piped up at the question. "Well, we got worried when we couldn't find you. We started asking people and they said they saw you go out this way with Zayn. So naturally, we came out here."

"A little too late it looks like..." Niall added.

"It's okay. I'm okay." I looked at him with a sad excuse for a smile.

He just sucked in a huge breath and exhaled loudly, rubbing his hands over his face.

"Niall, your hands!" I shrieked again at the sight of his bloody knuckles.

He pulled them back behind him. "It's fine. That happens." He said simply, looking somewhere else.

"Come on." I grabbed him by his forearm and tugged slightly, not getting the result I was wanting.

"Where are we going?" He asked with a smile on his face at the contact.

"To clean you up." I replied dryly. I was still tugging on him. He finally let me pull him along. Liam followed us close behind.

We reached the restrooms and Niall peeked into the men's, telling me it was clear. "Liam, stand guard." Niall told him.

He drug me into the bathroom gently. He leaned against the counter and looked to me with raised eyebrows, waiting expectantly.

I cleared my throat and walked to the sink next to him. I grabbed a hand towel and wet it with warm water. I grabbed his right hand and started to softly wipe away the now almost dried blood. There was so much of it. I can only imagine what Zayn must look like right now.

I was so focused until Niall spoke up. "I could do this myself ya'know?" He smiled at me goofily.

I stopped what I was doing. "Oh, sorry." I blushed and held out the cloth to him.

"But, I would rather you do it." He chuckled at my blushing face.

I blushed even darker at his statement. I just grabbed his other hand and tried to focus on that, and not the fact that he was staring at me intently the whole time.

When I was finished, I threw the towel into the trashcan a few feet away. I turned around to a still staring Niall. His face was focused, with a small smile on his lips.

"What?" I asked, feeling self-conscious.

His smile got wider, showing some teeth. "Nothing." He replied. He walked to the door and held it open for me.

I walked through the door only to walk into Liam, who hadn't moved once the whole time.

"What were you guys doing in there for so long?" He questioned.

I just blushed and looked at the floor. Niall laughed lightly and hit Liam in the arm.

"Come on Eilana, we'll walk you to class if it makes you feel better." He put his hand on my upper back and led me to my locker, making friendly conversation.

~

I walked home that evening. I needed time to think alone. I was half way there when I felt my phone vibrate in my pocket. I dug it out to see Louis was trying to get a hold of me.

Lou-Bear

Where are you? I can't find you anywhere. You weren't waiting by my car like usual. Are you okay?

I decided to walk home. I need to think about some things. Not the best day today. :/ I took the long way home. Head on to my house and I'll see you there. xx

When I got home, I opened the door to Louis holding his arms open wide for me, a sad expression on his face.

I walked into them, letting his arms warm me and his scent comfort me. "Louis. You don't know how happy I am to see you right now." I confessed.

"Are you okay, love? Had a bad day?" He looked down at me with his caring eyes.

"Mhmm." I nodded my head on his chest, making a pouty face.

"What can I do to help, hm? Should I make you some tea? Or put in your favorite Disney movie? How about we just snuggle for hours? You're freezing anyway." He rubbed my arms up and down gently.

I looked into his bright blue eyes. I knew what I wanted, what would make me feel better. I just had to be brave enough, and foolish enough to ask for it. I took in a short breath.

"Kiss me."

Louis just looked at me, shocked. "What?"

"I said, kiss me. Please, Louis. It's the only thing that will make me forget about this day." I begged. I didn't care that I sounded desperate. I was desperate. I needed him.

Louis studied me for a few seconds before taking my face in his hands and placing his lips on mine.

It took away every depressing thought I had that moment. All I cared about anymore was Louis. His hands found themselves in my hair. I put both of mine on his chest, leaning into him. I clutched his shirt in my hands as the kiss got more intimate.

His hand snaked its way down to my thigh, lingering there. He pulled me closer to him, closing the small space between us. I let my fingers play with his hair, while the other hand rested on the back of his neck. He slowly edged his hand around to my ass, squeezing it gently. I moaned at his sudden naughty behavior.

His hands slid up my back, pressing me to his overheated body. I grabbed the top of his hoodie and pulled it down his arms. He threw it somewhere distant and attached his hands to my waist. I threw my arms around his neck as he moved down to my jaw, sucking lightly.

He put both his hands on my thighs. "Jump." He mumbled against my ear. I jumped up and wrapped my legs around his waist. He held me up and walked to my room, still kissing his way down my neck.

He shut the door behind him with his foot. He laid me down on the bed and crawled over me. I pulled him down to me and kissed him with need. His hands ran up my shirt, slowly grazing my stomach with his fingertips. I swallowed hard at all the contact. Louis pulled back and looked me in the eyes.

"What's wrong?" I asked him, confused as to why he stopped.

"You don't want this." He stated seriously, drawing back from me.

"Yes I do." I argued.

I do want this, right?

"No. You're confused. I'm not doing this until I know you want it. Besides, we're just friends, right? I think this is a little far." He turned his head to the side, looking at anything but me.

I just lay there, shocked. I can't believe Louis Tomlinson just stopped himself from having sex. He denied me! What's worse is, he's right. I'm just confused.

He looked back to me, a contemplative expression on his face. "I'll be honest, I really want to. I do, but, I know you're just a bowl of jumbled emotions, and I'm not going to take advantage of that. I know you're going to regret it later, that's why I'm stopping myself." He rubbed his forehead in frustration. "You actually have no idea how hard it is to stop myself. Seeing you like this, laying under me, it makes it ten times harder, but I keep telling myself I'm doing it for you." He looked me in the eye and I could see the struggle he was having with himself.

He lowered his eyes to my lips, slightly parted and swollen from the previous makeout. Before he even realized it, he was inches away from me again.

He stopped himself. "Even now. Why did you have to do this to me? Now I'm going to find it that much harder to stay off of you." He shut his eyes tightly.

"Good." I smirked up at him, feeling confident and a bit naughty at the moment.

His eyes snapped open and he looked at me with a lustful gaze. "Please don't say that. Say you don't want me, that you're disgusted by me and my lustful behavior." He pleaded.

"But, I do want you." I couldn't stop the words that came out of my mouth before I realized what I was saying to my best friend.

He pressed his lips to mine, almost getting lost again before stopping. "No. That's it." He said to himself, clearly fighting the voice in his head.

He opened his eyes and got off me, rolling to the other side of the bed. "I'm so sorry." He mumbled.

"Why? Why are you apologizing for something I asked you to do?"

"I should have never kissed you." He stated more clearly.

"...Do you regret it?" I asked out of curiosity.

"..No. That's the problem." He sighed.

We lay there in silence for a short time, just staring at the ceiling. He looked at me, and I looked at him.

"What are we?" He asked me.

I thought about it for a long while before answering him, certain that my answer was right.

"Friends." I replied.

He smiled at me. "Good."

I smiled back. Even just being his friend, I feel like the luckiest girl in the world to know him.

"Let's just let things play out. Let's not force things to happen, or shy away from things that happen." Louis decided.

He's right.

"Agreed." I sighed and rolled over, my back to Louis.

I felt the bed sink as he rolled over and cuddled me into him. He wrapped his arm around me and nuzzled into my neck.

"Louis?" I questioned, confused by his actions at the moment.

"I'm still going to cuddle you. I did that before all of this, and I'm going to continue to do it after all of this. You're just going to have to live with it." He said, being stubborn.

I giggled at his reasoning and let him pull me closer. "I love you, Louis. You're the best person ever. Even if you are too horny for your own good sometimes." I laughed again, Louis joining me.

"Well, I'm a teenage boy. And this boy, loves you more than you think." He responded, kissing me on the cheek.

I wish you did...

~

Suddenly I was waking up, without ever remembering falling asleep. I still felt Louis' arm around me.

When did I fall asleep? What time is it?

I looked to the clock on my bedside table. 6:49pm.

Great. How am I going to sleep tonight?

I looked behind me to see Louis' still sleeping face. I admired it for a second before telling him to wake up. No response.

"Louis."

No response.

"Louis!"

Slight stirring.

"Louis! Louis! Louis!"

"What, love?" He finally woke from his hibernation apparently.

"I'm hungry." I pouted at him.

He rubbed his eyes and sat up, stretching. "Okay. Me too. Let's go get food." He smiled brightly at me and stood up.

I got up and fixed myself up so I didn't look like a dead man walking, and slipped my shoes back on, flipping my head over and putting my hair into a ponytail without thinking. "Ready?" I asked.

He just stared at my neck.

"Louis?" I tried again.

"What is that?" He pointed to my neck.

"Huh?" I walked over to the mirror and flinched when I saw the giant love bite Zayn gave me.

Well, that explains why I was so tender when he was kissing my neck earlier.

"Is that from me?" He asked aloud to himself.

I laughed sarcastically trying to brush it off. "Well, who else would it be from?" I asked him like he was an idiot.

He narrowed his eyes in suspicion. "I don't know. Why don't you tell me?" He asked seriously.

"What? You're not serious. Who else would I be kissing?"

He threw his arms up in the air and looked around, faking confusion. "Oh, I don't know, maybe that Niall guy? Because he seems pretty interested in you." He said.

I made a shocked face and put my hands on my hips. "Seriously though? Come on. You know it's not him."

Oh shit. Bad choice of words.

"Then who is it? Because I sure as hell didn't give it to you!" He said, frustrated.

"Yes you did! I swear I haven't been kissing anyone else!" I argued back.

He rubbed his face, hand on hip. He looked at me for a while. "Okay. I believe you. Maybe I'm being too harsh, I'm sorry." He walked over to me and hugged me, intertwining our fingers. "Maybe I got a little carried away earlier. Sorry, love. I won't be so rough on you next time." He smiled apologetically at me.

I giggled. "Next time?" I quizzed. "We sound like couple." I told him.

He laughed as well, putting his forehead to mine. "And now we look like a couple." He smiled brighter and kissed my nose. "So what?" He shrugged his shoulders.

He pulled me out of the room and grabbed my coat, handing it to me. I put it on and let my hair down again, not wanting to display such an ugly thing. He wandered around a bit before finding his hoodie and slipping it back on.

We got in his car and drove around until we found what we wanted. We decided on one of the local café hangouts we always go to.

Only after a few minutes of sitting there did I notice. I put my menu up quickly to hide my face.

Please don't see me. Please don't see meee!

I peeked over the top of the menu to see brown eyes staring at me from across the room.

Dammit Liam! Don't draw attention to me!

He was sitting at a table across the way with Niall and Harry.

He waved at me faintly, smiling sweetly.

Ugh. Don't even do that. You look like a damn puppy.

I smiled back weakly. Looking back to Louis, he was still scanning the menu, oblivious.

I peeked back over. Now Niall was staring at me. Harry seemed too lost in thought to even notice.

Thank heaven.

I decided to ignore them, and stopped looking over there at all costs.

I wonder what Harry could be thinking about that's so important?

"Are you okay, love? You seem uncomfortable." Louis' curious voice piped up.

"Hm? Oh, um, yeah. I'm fine." I answered horribly. He gave me a strange look but didn't ask again.

"So how much longer are you going to have to work with Payne?" He asked curiously.

I hoped to myself that Liam didn't have some kind of super hearing ability.

"I don't know, to be honest." I replied, just as clueless as him. "And you? What about Lily?"

He sighed and ran his fingers through his hair. "I don't know either. Hopefully, not very long. But then again, I’m pretty much doing all the work by myself while she bats her eyelashes at me." He rolled his eyes.

We laughed at nothing, then we were silent. Just enjoying each other.

We were interrupted by a familiar voice.

"Well, aren't we the lovely couple?"

Ugh. Leave me alone.

Chapter Text

"Well, aren't we the lovely couple?" I heard an all too familiar voice.

I let out a heavy sigh. "Go away Harry."

He slipped into the booth, sitting next to me. He put his arm around my shoulder and gave Louis and I an amused smirk. "I'm not interrupting anything, am I?" His smirk grew into a full on cocky smile.

"Yes actually. My happiness. Congratulations, you've won. Now can you leave?" I threw his arm off of me, disgusted by his filthy hands.

Who knows what whore's trousers those have been down.

He completely ignored my response and leaned forward on the table, clasping his hands together. "I just couldn't help noticing the sweet little mismatched couple from across the way." He faked a sweet smile.

I rolled my eyes at him and crossed my arms.

"She asked you to leave, Styles." Louis stated firmly, scowling at Harry.

Harry ignored him too. "You do realize, how weird you two look with each other, right? I mean, you've got one of the most popular, rich boys in the school, hanging out with the odd, unpopular, poor, peasant girl." His face was smug. It made me sick.

"I'm going to assume you didn't hear me the first time. I'll tell you again. Leave." I said through gritted teeth.

"So, is this a date? Or no?" He continued to ignore me, looking to Louis for an answer this time.

Louis didn't answer and instead clenched his jaw. He looked uncomfortable at Harry's question, not knowing the answer
himself.

Harry chuckled at the silence. He draped his long arm around me once more, leaning back in his seat.

"Styles, take a fucking hint that you are not welcome here, or so help me god, I will find the largest object I can to shove up your asshole." I threatened calmly, looking at him with a smile on my lips.

He cocked his eyebrow at me and licked his lips. "You just want an excuse to pull my trousers down." I could hear the cockiness dripping from his words.

I scoffed at him, looking the opposite direction. Louis' fists clenched in anger.

"Okay. You leave now." Louis said.

Harry put his hands up and laughed lightly. "So hostile, you two." He stood up but turned around and leaned closer to me. "I know you want me. You can act like you hate me all you want, but you're just in denial." He winked at me and quickly kissed me on the cheek, leaving me shocked.

Louis stood up immediately at the sight, pushing Harry away from me. "I dare you to touch her again you prick!"

Harry laughed again. "Calm down, I can touch her if I want. She doesn't belong to you, Tomlinson. Besides, it will never work between you two anyway."

What happened next shocked me further. Louis punched Harry square in the jaw, with enough force to knock Harry on his ass.

Harry looked just as shocked as me about all of it. But surprisingly, he didn't get mad. Instead he let out a small chuckle and stood up, brushing himself off.

He looked up to Louis and smirked. "Well, you don't seem to be a pussy like I thought. You've got quite a swing. I respect that."

He turned and walked out, leaving everyone both confused and shocked at his reaction to the situation.

Everyone looked at Louis. He just sat down, not caring about all the attention.

"Louis! You can't just punch people!" I hissed at him.

"The bastard was asking for it." He said calmly, shrugging his shoulders. "Besides, are you really going to just let him talk to you like that?"

I slumped down in the seat, sighing. "I'm not gonna lie, it was pretty satisfying to see him get hit for once."

I looked up through my eyelashes to see Niall and Liam approaching our table.

Great.

"Are you okay?" Niall asked me as they stopped in front of us.

I gave him a short smile, looking down. "I'm fine. I'm not sure about your friend though." I took a sip of my drink.

"We're not worried about him. Just making sure everything was alright over here." Liam chimed, looking over to Louis shortly.

"Right. Well, we're fine, thanks." I said, not even looking at them.

They both gave each other a look. "Guess we'll see you around then." Liam spoke before they both walked out, after Harry I'm
sure.

I looked up to see an interested Louis staring at me. "What was that about?" He asked me.

 

"I don't know. I guess maybe they pity me and you?" I lied. Well, it wasn't all untrue.

"Or they want to get in your trousers." Louis mumbled under his breath.

"No. Maybe they're just not as bad as Harry and Zayn. Ever thought about that?" I asked.

"They're guilty either way. I don't like them. Why does it seem like you're sticking up for them? You're not growing close to Liam are you?" He asked, but it seemed like he already knew the answer.

"No! I hate them too, but.." I trailed off.

He cocked an eyebrow at me, giving me a disapproving look. "But what?"

"I really don't think they're as bad as their friends. They actually seem like they could be cool guys." I finished, nervously straightening my napkin.

Louis didn't look happy about my words, but dropped the whole thing anyway.

It was silent between us for a while, before Louis cracked another joke and it was back to normal again. Louis never stayed in a bad mood for long. Just another one of those things I loved about him.

~

"Louis, do you ever get tired of being friends with me?" I asked him as we walked through the park, hand in hand.

He looked at me funny, with a grin. "What do you mean?" He asked.

"Well, even though you're popular, you're still known as the popular guy who hangs out with the weird, poor girl. Doesn't that get on your nerves? That I ruin your reputation?"

"Of course not! You are what makes me happy all the time! I'll never get tired of you, Eilana. I'll do whatever it takes, as long as it means you're a part of my life." A huge smile adorned his face as he squeezed my hand tighter.

I only smiled back at him, happy to hear him say those words.

He laughed a bit before saying what was on his mind. "Is it bad that I'm happy I'm your only friend? Because I like having you all to myself."

I laughed at his question. "No, it's not bad. You're the only friend I need, Louis." I answered, smiling up at him.

"Good. Because I think I would be too jealous. I like being the only one that gets your full attention. And all your hugs. I like those too." He grinned sweetly at me. "Are you cold? You're hands are freezing and you're shaking like a leaf."

"Nope. I'm fine." I lied.

I knew I shouldn't have left my jacket in the car. I know it's October, but why is it so damn cold?

"Here." Louis held his grey coat open for me.

"I'm fine, Louis. Now put it back on before you get cold." I told him.

"Eilana, I'm serious." He gave me a stern look and held it out once more.

I sighed in frustration before letting him put it around my shoulders. He smiled in victory and latched his arms around me, walking again.

All I've been able to think about tonight, is how much we must look like a couple. In everything we do. Especially right now.

"Something on your mind?" Louis asked curiously.

"Huh? Oh, no. Just off in my own little world." I laughed at myself, hoping my thoughts weren't obvious.

"I can see." He smiled down at me and kissed the top of my head.

It made me smile, but it set off so many questions in my head.

"Louis?"

"Yes, love?"

"Why are you being so affectionate lately?" I asked him bluntly.

He was quiet for a while before answering. "I don't know. Haven't I always been affectionate towards you?"

"Well, yes. But it's been constant lately. You're always kissing me or hugging me. It seems like every time I turn around, you're touching me." I laughed lightly, thinking about it.

"Does it bother you?" He asked with concern.

"No. Just wondering why." I replied honestly.

"Oh. Well, I guess it's because I just love you so much. Not to mention that you are literally the cutest thing ever. And I just like knowing that I can. It makes me feel like you trust me, and love me back, to let me be all over you all the time." He snickered lightly at his answer, hugging me tighter to him.

I smiled and rolled my eyes at him. "Of course, Louis."

"Do you like it?" He asked me.

"Like what?" I asked back, confused.

"Me touching you all the time. You like it, don't you?" He asked cockily, smirking at me as he opened his car door for me.

I blushed bright pink and got in the car quickly, avoiding his gaze. He got in the drivers’ seat and turned the car on, putting his hand on my thigh and smiling over at me.

"I know you do." He said.

I blushed even more. He was right, I loved it. He had more of an effect on me than he thought.

"I'm only teasing you, love." He chuckled at my reaction.

~

When we got back to my house, I was surprised to see mom in the kitchen.

"Hey mommy." I hugged her.

"Hello sweetie. Hi Louis." She hugged me back, and hugged Louis too.

"I've been meaning to tell you, but I haven't really seen you much this week and I keep forgetting. I'm going out of town this weekend, I don't really want you staying here alone though." She made a thoughtful face, tapping her chin.

"I'll be fine, mom." I rolled my eyes. I was alone in this house ninety five percent of the time anyway. Well, okay, Louis was usually here too, but...

"She can stay at my house." Louis suggested.

No! No, no, no. Please say no mom.

"That's sounds like a wonderful idea! If it's not too much trouble of course?" She agreed.

"Not at all! I would be happy to have her! And so would mum and my sisters!" Louis chimed happily, smiling at me.

"Well then, pack your stuff sweetie. I'm leaving tomorrow. I'll be back Monday night."

I groaned. "Four days?"

She only nodded her head and kissed me on the cheek, walking out.

"Oh come now, you'll love it!" Louis grabbed my hand and dragged me to my room.

I hate staying at Louis' house. It's so big and fancy. I feel out of place, and like I'll dirty everything I touch. Maybe I am just a peasant. I'm worthless anyway.

I sighed.

"Something wrong?" Louis asked.

"I just feel so inadequate in your house, Louis. You know that." I plopped down on my bed.

I heard Louis sigh too, and felt him sit down beside me. He put his arms around me. "I know. But I don't want you to. I want you to live like you deserve to. Don't fret about it. I want you to relax this weekend. Okay?"

"I'll try." I told him.

Louis, why don't you just realize that I'm not worth it?

Chapter Text

I could feel the hot tears run down my cheeks as Zayn climbed over me. I couldn’t move. My arms and legs were too heavy to move. All I could do was lay here. I called out for help, knowing no one would hear me. The only sounds that could be heard were his heavy breathing and my whimpers of fear. I didn't know where I was or how I got here. This dark and empty room seems to go on forever.

I called out for help again, desperate for anyone to hear me. He slapped me. It stung and smeared the tears across my face.

"Shut up! Learn to behave." He glared at me with dark eyes.

He ran his tongue up my neck slowly and I shivered. I was scared.

"Louis." I managed to whisper between sobs. All I wanted right now was Louis.

Suddenly I'm pulled up and into a tight embrace.

"I'm right here, Eilana. It's okay. You're okay. It was just a bad dream, love." Louis whispered softly into my ear as he rubbed my back.

"Louis?" The room is dark and I can barely make out his face.

"Yes?" He asks. His face is one of concern, his brows knitted together.

I didn't say anything, I just buried my face in his shoulder and cried for a moment. I finally remembered I'm in the guest bedroom of his house. He wiped the tears from my face and smiled at me sweetly.

"Do you want to sleep with me tonight?" He asked. I quickly took him up on his offer, nodding my head like a child.

He picked me up and carried me to his room, setting me down on the bed.

"How did you know I was having a bad dream?" I looked up at him curiously.

He slid into bed next to me and pulled the covers over us, looking at me.

"Well, I couldn't sleep, so I decided to check on you. Half way down the hall I heard cries coming from your room, so I rushed in to see what was wrong." He replied, grinning at me slightly.

"How come you couldn't sleep?" Another question popped into my head.

He looked down to my hands and grabbed one, holding it while he played with my hair in the other.

"I guess, I just got used to you sleeping beside me. So when you weren't here, I felt...lonely." He stared right into my eyes, making me blush. He smiled at this. "I missed you, I suppose." He finished.

"Oh." Is all I said, looking down. That's when I noticed that he's bare chested. I snuggled up to him, inhaling his scent. It was comforting.

We lay there for a few minutes, in a comfortable silence. I curled up to him and he cradled me.

"Do you want to talk about it? ...Your dream, I mean." He spoke up.

I thought about it for a second.

Uh, no.

"I would rather not." I responded truthfully.

He just nodded his head, understanding. He snuggled up to me again and remained quiet.

As I was laying there, one thing kept going through in my head.

Why was Zayn doing this? Is this all Harry’s idea? Is this his way of getting back at me without getting his hands dirty? Is he trying to scare me? That bastard. How cruel. I knew he was low, but not that low.

"Are you okay? You seem a little tense?" Louis asked suddenly.

"I'm fine. Just thinking about things.”

"Like what?"

"Nothing. Get some sleep, Louis."

"Anything I can help with?"

"Night, Louis." I rolled my eyes with a smile and before I knew it, I was hard asleep, dreaming of pleasant things.

~

I woke up to the light in my eyes. Sitting up and stretching, I walked over to the window and pulled the curtains open. I wasn't usually a morning person, but today I was in a really good mood for some reason.

"Ah! My sensitive eyes!!" Louis exclaimed loudly. He got up and walked over to me, pulling the curtains shut completely, and picking me up on the way back to bed, pulled me into bed with him and tried to go back to sleep.

"Louiiiis!" I whined at him. "It's a pretty Saturday. We should do something fun!"

He opened one eye to look at me. "I agree. Something fun, like sleeping! Sleeping is fun! Let's sleep!" He said excitedly, closing his eyes again.

"Loouis!" I whined again. "Let's go outside. I never go outside." I suggested.

He raised his head slightly, opening both eyes. "Alright, alright. Anything for you, love." He gave in, getting up and walking towards his bathroom.

"Where are you going?" I asked him quickly.

"To take a shower. Do you want to join me?" He flashed me a cheeky grin and wiggled his eyebrows.

I giggled at him and threw a pillow in his direction, hitting him right in the face. He gave me a playful mad expression and shut the door, chuckling.

I rolled my eyes and walked back to the guest room I was staying in. I sat on the bed and looked around at it for a minute, taking it in.

The walls were a soft green color and the large open floor was covered with snow white carpet. The furniture was Victorian style in a glossy black finish. The king sized four poster bed was covered in black silk and plush pillows. The room was decorated in accents of gold, and above the giant dresser was a giant flat screen mounted on the wall. It even had its own master bathroom attached to it. It was basically a reflection of the rest of the house, really. So expensive and clean looking. I was getting uncomfortable again.

I had started to get used to it here. I thought I could forget about it, but I can't help but feel out of place. Being around all of this, I feel like I should enjoy it, but, all it does is make me feel...low.

I sigh loudly and get up, getting ready for the day. I put on my white skinnies and my black Alice in Wonderland T-shirt, gray cardigan over it. I decide to wear my 'E' necklace and some black converse.

I apply some makeup and leave my hair in its curly state. I gave myself a once over in the golden full length mirror on the wall. I looked average. And I'm sure I looked even more horrible standing next to Louis. I ran my fingers through my hair and walked to the bed, falling back on it. I played around on my phone for a few minutes before I heard the door open and saw Louis walk in.

"Hey sunshine! Ready to go?" He asked, walking over to me.

"Yeah, I guess." I replied in a dull manner.

He frowned at me and sat down on the bed. "What's wrong with my sunshine? You're not very sunshiney anymore."

"I don't know Louis, I don't wanna talk about it." I wasn't going to pretend there wasn't anything wrong with me.

"Talk about what?"

"If I told you, that would defeat the purpose of not talking about, now wouldn't it?" I snapped at him sarcastically.

He looked surprised at my behavior towards him suddenly. I was surprised too, to be honest.

"I'm sorry Louis. I didn't mean to snap at you like that." I apologized quickly.

"It's okay, love. You're upset. I understand that. I just wish you would tell me so I can make it better." He put his arm around me and rubbed my shoulder, looking down at me sadly.

I sighed and closed my eyes, wanting all of this confusion to just be over.

I'm not about to tell him how being around him and his natural life makes me uncomfortable.

"Let's just go. I need some fresh air."

I need to get away from this house.

He just nodded his head, leading me out of the house.

~

We sat down at the coffee shop after a long day of window shopping and arcade games. I was in a really good mood today, despite how it started. This was the most fun I've had in a long time.

We ordered our drinks and joked around for a while. I don't think anything could spoil this day after all. There was no sign of Harry and his lot in sight. Just me and Louis. It was perfect.

We were sipping at our hot drinks when a group of people I recognized from school approached our table. Mostly giggling girls I noticed.

"Hey Louis!" They all screeched at him, giving him hugs and kisses on the cheek.

Not gonna lie, I was furious with jealousy.

The guys just did that weird hand shake thing that guys do.

Louis greeted them all with a smile. They were his friends after all. They talked for a while, chatting about this and that. I, on the other hand, didn't say a word. The guys didn't even glance at me, and the girls were glaring at me every now and again. Only when they were sure Louis wasn't looking, of course.

I hated when this happened. I knew Louis had other friends. I mean, he's one of the schools most popular guys. Everyone loved him, and I don't blame them. How could you not love him? I don't mind him having other friends. I just hate being around when they're there. It makes me feel, once again, like I don't belong.

There were just so many things that seemed to point to me not fitting in with Louis. It made me wonder, was I bringing him down by being friends with him?

Should I stop and let him go? But if we're not supposed to be friends then why do we get along so well? Would he be happier without me? Probably. But I'm just too selfish to let him go like that.

They finally said their goodbyes and left after what seemed like hours.

Louis looked to me, a sheepish expression on his face. "Sorry about that."

I just smiled fakely and wiggled my eyebrows at him. "No biggie."

I just looked back at my empty cup, staring blankly. Louis hadn't even drunk half of his, he was too busy talking to his buddies. It was probably cold by now anyway.

He stared at me. "You okay? You seem kind of mad." He observed.

I just sighed and put my forehead on the table for a second. "I don't know what I am anymore. I can't seem to stick with one emotion lately." I explained more to myself than to him.

He just raised his eyebrows in response, looking a little worried. "Would you like to go home?" He asked sweetly.

"Please, I think that would be best."

"Okay then. Whatever I can do to make you happy." He smiled at me sweetly, holding my coat out for me.

That's just the thing, Louis. In a way, you’re what's making me unhappy. I know you don't mean to, you can't help it. We just weren't meant to be friends. I should have known that from the start.

I wanted to tell him all of that. So badly I wanted to, but I was too much of a coward. I didn’t know how he’d react, and I didn’t want to hurt him.

~

When we arrived at the house, I started to walk straight to the room I was staying in.

"Where are you going? I thought maybe we could watch a movie or something."

"I'm sorry Louis, I just really need some alone time right now. I don't want to snap at you again." I told him.

He looked upset at my words. "...Oh. Okay, then maybe later or something." He tried to smile over his frown, but it wasn't working so well.

I suddenly felt horrible for blowing him off like that, but I needed to get away from him for a little while.

"Sorry, Louis. It's not your fault, I promise. I'm just kinda moody right now." I gave him a weak smile and turned away, heading for my room.

I closed the door and laid on the bed, thinking about everything. I seem to do that a lot these days.

I must have laid there for hours just thinking about me and Louis. Even Niall and Liam. I had really come to like them. I don't know when it happened exactly, but I'm always really happy around those two. I wish I could tell Louis. I wish I could convince him that they're cool and then we could maybe all be friends, but I feel like I have to hide it from him. I know he wouldn't take it well.

I felt my phone buzz in my pocket. I rolled over and pulled it out, looking at the screen. It was number I didn't recognize, but I decided to answer anyway.

Probably the wrong number or something.

“Hello?”

Hey! Uh, it's me, Niall.

I suddenly felt nervous and giddy.

Why is he calling me?

I tried not to squeal out loud and composed myself.

Hello?

“Yes! Uh, yeah?”

I smacked my forehead for sounding so eager.

Sorry, I hope I'm not interrupting anything?

“Nope.”

Good. Umm, listen, I was calling because, well this is going to sound weird but, I was going to go get dinner but everyone is either already eating or busy, so I was gonna ask if you wanted to give me some company over dinner? I mean, ya'know, as friends of course.

I couldn't keep the giant grin off of my face as he stumbled over his words. I was instantly happy that he would think of spending time with me. Even if I was his last option, I was still an option!

“I would like that.”

Great! I'll come pick you up.

Oh no. How was I supposed to tell him I was staying at Louis' house? What would he think?

“Uh, well, I'm not exactly at my house...”

That's okay! I can pick you up from wherever. Where are you?

“I'm- Um, well I'm at Louis' place. Do you know where he lives?”

Okay. Yeah I know where he lives. I'll be over in a few minutes. See you then!

The line went dead before I could even say bye.

He didn't even seem to care that I was at Louis' house. But he probably still thinks I'm a slut. Maybe I'm over thinking this? Surely Niall isn't that judgmental. But It does seem kind of slutty that I'm staying at a guy’s house over the weekend. Ugh. I don't know... He thinks I'm a slut.

I rolled my eyes, stopping at that thought. I walked over to the mirror and inspected myself. I gave myself a few touch-ups. I kept telling myself that this wasn't a date, but I couldn't help but feel nervous.

I've never really been alone around Niall before. I mean, for a few minutes maybe, but not hanging out, just the two of us.

I wonder what he's really like?

Suddenly the thought came to me. How was I going to tell Louis?

Oh shit. Maybe if I just sneak out he won't even notice I'm gone? I doubt that. Maybe I should just tell him the truth. He'll understand right? Sure he will. It's Louis.

I heard a car pull up outside. I rushed downstairs as quietly as I could, hoping I wouldn't run into Louis. I was almost to the front door when I heard a voice from behind me.

"Where are you going?" Louis asked, confused.

I felt guilty all of a sudden. I didn't want to tell him.

"Uhh, I'm just going out to dinner with a friend. I'll be back in a little bit, okay?" I looked at him with a sheepish smile.

"Who? I thought I was your only friend?" He questioned, crossing his arms over his chest and raising his eyebrow at me.

Ouch. Thank you for that comment Louis.

I bit my lip. I didn't know what to say.

"Well, you are. In a way. You're my only guy friend." I lied.

He didn't seem convinced. "But you always told me you didn't get along with girls."

Oh yeah. There was that little fact.

"I'll be back in a little bit. Love you!" I called out as I darted out the door.

Niall was waiting for me, holding the car door open.

I gave him a grin and a hello as I got in the car. He shut the door for me and got in the drivers side.

I sighed as we pulled away from Louis and his mansion. I didn't realize until now that Louis has been causing me a lot of stress lately. I feel like I have to hide everything from him. I know it shouldn't be that way between us, but I can't help but feel that he'll overreact to all of it and it’ll only cause a rift in our friendship. At this point though, I'm not sure if he would be over reacting, with everything that's happened behind his back.

I feel like this...thing that's happening between us is kind of being pushed. Not by me or him, but by the way that he's been reacting to everything lately. It's making me think that he likes me, in more than a physical attraction sense. It's stressing me out because I know he doesn't. And now that I realize we live two different lives, I know it's going to end up just crashing and burning anyway.

~

"So, how come you're staying at Louis'?" Niall asked me as the waitress set our food down.

We decided on Nando's. We both loved it so why not? It's not like we were trying to be fancy.

"Well, my mom had to go out of town for the weekend, so she told me
I should stay with Louis. She just doesn't like me being home alone." I answered honestly.

He just shook his head. "Cool." Was all he said.

I raised my eyebrows at him. "Cool?" I giggled.

He just grinned at me for laughing at him. "Yeah. You know, it's cool that you're close enough to your guy friend that you can stay the night together without worrying about it." He clarified, taking a bite of his food.

"Oh." I laughed at his explanation. "I guess. It's always been that way for me though. I mean, I've never had any female friends to compare it to. So I guess I'm just as comfortable with a guy as I would be with a girl.

"Really? You've only ever had guys for friends?" He asked, shocked.

"I've only ever had Louis, really. Why are you so surprised?" I laughed a little at his face.

"Well, judging by how shy you act around them, I wouldn't guess. And what do you mean, only Louis?" His face was curious.

"Well, before I moved to England, I went to an all girl school all my life, but since I don't get along with girls, I never had any friends." I explained.

"You mean, none? No friends? Ever?" He asked dramatically, making me laugh.

"Yep. Not one. They all hated me." I said nonchalantly.

"Wow. I'm sorry. I can't imagine anyone not liking you, though."

"Well, it tends to happen a lot. In case you haven't noticed." I joked.

He chuckled at my sarcasm. "Shame, really. I think everyone would like you if they gave you a chance. You're a cool girl, Eilana." He smiled at me sweetly.

I smiled back and blushed a tiny bit. "Thank you, Niall."

We finished our meal over jokes and facts about one another. He insisted that he pay for me when the tab came, I fought him about it but he won in the end. I thanked him and he asked me if I wanted to hang out for a little while. I agreed and he called Liam. He asked me if I wanted to go to Liam's house and chill. I thought that sounded fun so that's where we went.

~

"That's bullshit! I blocked it! I blocked it! Niall whined when I beat him at Street Fighter.

"There are ladies present, Niall. Watch your tongue." Liam got onto Niall for his choice words.

"I don't mind Liam. I've got quite a bad fucking case of the sailors mouth myself." I confessed to him.

He looked surprised but nodded his head, laughing at my sudden language.

I just laughed as Niall kept whining about his loss to me.

"I guess I'm just going to have to show you how it's done, mate." Liam teased as he took Niall's seat next to me, grabbing the controller.

I stuck my tongue out at Niall playfully. He scrunched his face up in a funny smile in response. I turned back to the screen as he sat behind me.

"Bring it on puppy man!" I taunted at Liam.

He laughed at my nickname for him, shaking his head at my silliness.

I was already pretty comfortable around them. They just made me feel at ease, and they were so much fun to be around. I realized that they're a lot like me.

~

At around 10pm, I decided it was getting a little late for me to be out. I knew Louis would be mad about me being gone for so long, so Niall dropped me off at the house.

"Want me to walk you to the door so no monsters get ya?" Niall teased.

I laughed at his question and shook my head. "It's probably a better idea not to. But thank you anyway." I told him

He just smiled at me. "Okay then. We should hang out more often, yeah? You're really fun to be around."

I smiled at his comment. "Yeah. I would like that. You're fun to be around too. Thanks for inviting me." I looked at him.

"The pleasure was all mine." He beamed at me, getting out of the car.

I watched him, confused. He walked around to my side of the car and opened my door.

"At least let me open the door for you." He held his hand out and I took it.

I smiled at his gentlemanly ways.

"Can I have a hug? Or is that weird?" He asked with a funny face.

I laughed at him and gave him a hug. We both pulled away with a huge smile on our faces.

"Well, I'll see you around." He walked over to his car again.

"See ya." I waved.

He got in his car and pulled off.

I turned around to face the front door of Louis' house and took a deep breath.

This isn’t going to go well.

I walked into a quiet house. I guess everyone had retreated to their bedrooms for the night.

I slowly walked upstairs, stopping at the top.

Maybe I should go talk to Louis... On the other hand I think it can wait until morning.

I walked to my room and opened the door only to see Louis sitting on the bed. He was leaned over with his elbows on his knees and his head in his hands. He looked up when he heard me walk in.

"Louis? What are you doing in here?"

He stood up and walked over to me, hugging me. That took me off guard. The last thing I expected him to do was greet me so nicely.

"I'm so glad you're okay." He looked at me.

I gave him a puzzled look. "Of course I am. I told you I was with a friend."

"Eilana, who were you with?"

I just rolled my eyes and walked past him to the bed, setting my stuff down. "Do you have to know everything?" I asked, annoyed.

"No. But I would like to know who the hell my best friend is going out and spending all of the night with!" He blew up.

There it is.

I scoffed at him. "Oh please, Louis. It was hardly all of a night."

"Well, I would still like to know. I was worried sick! I've been sitting here since you left almost four hours ago!" He grabbed his hair in frustration.

"Well I'm sorry! I didn't intend to be gone that long." I spat back.

"Who were you with, anyway?" He tried again.

"You won't be happy if I tell you, so I might as well not." I said simply.

He just looked at me for a few seconds before cocking his head to the side and narrowing his eyes. "It was that Niall guy wasn't it?"

My eyes widened at his correct assumption.

His face lit up at my reaction. "It was wasn't it? I'm right!" He scoffed to himself at this information.

I just sighed loudly and threw my head back.

"Why didn't you just tell me?" He asked like it was obvious.

I looked at him like he was crazy. "Are you serious? Why didn't I just tell you? Because you would have blown up about it and not let me go!"

"I would not!" He argued.

"And what are you doing right now, Louis?"

He was silent.

"Exactly. I know better than to just tell you." I laughed bitterly.

He just rubbed his face and looked around. "Okay. Fine. I'm not going to bother you about it anymore. You're right, I have no place to get mad at you for hanging out with someone. I'm just concerned for your safety. I'm sorry I care about you so damn much."

He walked over to me and gave me another hug. "But you have to understand, that you are the most precious thing to me, and it would kill me if something happened to you. That's why I act the way I do. But if it really bothers you so much, I'll try to stop." He finished, kissing my forehead and smiling at me.

I smiled back and gave him another hug. "I know Louis. I'm sorry I make you worry so much."

He chuckled and tucked some hair behind my ear. "Do you want to stay with me again tonight?"

I bit my lip, looking down. "Actually, I think I'm going to stay in here tonight. If that's okay with you?" I gave him an apologetic look.

His face dropped a little, but it quickly returned to a smile. "Of course, love. I understand. I'm sorry about all of this." He looked at the floor.

"It's okay, Louis. I'm not mad. I just feel like being alone right now." I gave him a sweet smile. He returned it and walked to the door.

"Okay. Sleep well, love. I love you." He smiled at me from the door and turned the light off after I crawled into bed.

"Love you too, Louis." I snuggled up as I listened to him walk away.

It was that sound that made me break down and cry. Louis and I never fight. Ever.

What's happening to us?

Chapter Text

It's been two weeks since I had to stay at Louis' house. Things have been pretty much the same, but Louis and I have been fighting a lot lately. I don't know why. Suddenly he just seems stressed and tense all the time. We haven't been hanging out every single day like we used to, and it seems like there's something he's not telling me. It's freaking me out. Louis wasn't being himself at all.

And due to the fact that we weren't together 24/7 anymore, I've become good friends with Niall and Liam. Now I don't feel so lonely when Louis isn't around. I know I have someone else to call now. It's nice. They're both really sweet to me, and I can be myself around them. I just wish we had become friends sooner.

They told me they haven't been spending much time with Harry lately, and he's not happy about it, but that they're still friends. He has no idea that they're with me though. Probably better that way.

I sighed as I walked back into my room, seeing an empty bed. I missed Louis being around all the time. Well, the old Louis. I don't know who this person he's been lately was. But of course I still missed him. He's the best thing that's ever happened to my life.

I got ready for school quickly, taking notice of how quiet it was in my house. It was a bit depressing to be honest.

I grabbed my stuff and slumped out the door slowly. Just as I was locking up, I heard Louis pull up. I turned around with a smile on my face.

Maybe today would be the day. Maybe today he would be in a good mood. Maybe today, he would be the old Louis again.

I jogged to his car, watching as he opened the door for me from the inside, and got in quickly. He had a grin on his face like usual, and pulled me into a hug.

"Morning, love. How are you doing today?" He chimed cheerily as he sped off towards school.

"I'm doing alright. You?"

His face showed a small fake grin as he replied. "I'm good."

I knew Louis well enough to know when his smile was genuine or not. And lately, getting a genuine smile out of him was a rare thing.

I sighed and looked out the window.

Looks like today wasn't going to be any better after all.

~

When we got to school, I started to get out of the car but Louis stopped me, looking me in the eyes and signaling that he wanted a kiss. I looked around really quick to make sure no one was looking, and I leaned over to give him a peck on the lips. I broke away for a second before he pulled back and gave me a long, passionate kiss.

I was surprised at his actions. That was the first time we had ever kissed in public, and even though no one saw us, I was still shocked. I started to lecture him about it, but when I saw that he pulled away with a great big genuine smile, I stopped and smiled back. At least for a few seconds, I had made him happy.

"I've missed you, Eilana." He spoke softly to me, a gentle smile on his face.

"I've missed you too." I stated honestly.

We smiled at each other again and got out of the car. Walking into school, he linked hands with me, but this time I let him. I missed him, and I wasn't going to waste the time we spent together. Because I don't know when suddenly he'll turn sour and go away again.

The stares we were getting did not go unnoticed by me. And although I didn't care, I knew by the time lunch rolled around, everyone would be talking about us.

Harry had not been bothering me every day like usual. Sure he still did, but not like he used to. And even when he did show up around me, it was just him and Zayn. I guess Niall and Liam decided they didn't want to be part of that anymore. I also noticed that he wasn't being as harsh on me anymore either. And Zayn has left me alone completely, although I still had nightmares about him.

So I guess you could say some things were going a bit better for me.

~

Later in the day, I decided to go to the school library on my free period. I know I don't seem like someone who likes to read, but I actually really enjoyed it.

When I got there, I realized it was almost empty. There couldn't have been more than five people in there. And the ones that were in there weren't even reading. They were on some electronic device. I rolled my eyes at the sight.

I forgot, rich kids don't read, do they? They have someone to read for them.

I was browsing some of the books in a back corner away from everyone and out of sight. I couldn't hear their gum smacking and texting thumbs from all the way back here.

I was about to pull out a book when a hand suddenly appeared on the shelf in front of my eyes. I recognized that hand. I turned around to see a pair of green eyes staring down at me.

"I was starting to wonder where you were, Harry. Come to give me my daily teasing? Well, you're wasting your time. It doesn't affect me. So just get it over with." I rolled my eyes and turned my head in another direction, not wanting to have to look at him.

He just chuckled slightly and shook his head from side to side. "Oh no, love. I've come to give you another kind of teasing. One that will affect you." His famous smirk was plastered onto his face.

"Like what?" I taunted.

I've really got to learn to shut up.

His smirk grew into a toothy grin as he backed me into the bookshelf. He put his left hand on the shelf behind me and leaned in. "Don't worry. You'll like it." He winked as he slid his hand up my skirt. I slapped his hand away and glared at him.

"Don't touch me, Styles!" I hissed at him, trying not to be too loud.

The grin never left his face as he pinched my blushing cheek. "Aw, I'm just trying to have a little fun. You look like you could use some too. You’re always so uptight about everything."

I swatted his hand away again as I stepped to the left, going to make a run for it, but he put his other hand up, stopping me.

"Where are you going? I'm just trying to talk to you. How rude of you to walk away."

I scoffed at him. "Bullshit. If you were just trying to talk to me then there would be no reason to stick your hand places it doesn't belong!" I looked him up and down with disdain. "You're disgusting!"

He laughed at my disapproval. "Okay. I'll admit I wasn't just trying to talk to you. Now, how about you just admit that you want me to touch you and give up the act." He sneered at me.

"Are you fucking mental? You can't be serious. Just accept that I'm the only girl in this school that doesn't want to suck your cock. You're such a spoiled brat that you think there is no way anyone could dislike you! Well, I'm here to tell you that there are going to be people in this world that won't like you, and they will tell you no! So you better get used to it! How hard is it to just grow up?! Dammit!" I finished my rant to see that his smirk had dropped into a scowl.

But as soon as it dropped, it was back up and smirking again. "So, what you're saying is, you don't hate me, you just dislike me?"

I just sighed in frustration and rolled my eyes again.

He took the opportunity to kiss me. He placed his hand on the back of my neck, making it impossible to pull away. But his kiss was different this time. It wasn't harsh. My eyes snapped open when I felt his hand on my thigh, sliding up my skirt again. I slapped it away, still unable to get away from his kiss. He smiled against my lips at my resistance.

He reached his arm around my back and grabbed my arm on the other side of me, pulling me into him and locking my arms to my sides. He stuck his free hand right back up my skirt, trailing upwards slowly. His hand snaked its way up to my ass, he grabbed it firmly in his big hand and squeezed hard, making me emit a sound of discomfort.

He broke the kiss and smirked down at me. I turned my head quickly upon separation, gasping for breath. I glared at him from the corner of my eyes.

He grabbed my face and turned me to look at him. "Go on, pretend you didn't enjoy that. Look me in the eye and lie to me." He dared me, already searching my eyes for an answer.

He is a great kisser... No! Ugh. Don't start this, brain.

I looked him back in the eye and glared at him like I've never glared before. "I didn't. Not one bit. And for your information, that ass grab hurt." I grinned at him sarcastically.

His grin got wider at my words. "A little pain makes things exciting. And you're lying." And with that he turned and walked away, leaving me in a flustered silence.

The worst part about this entire situation? He's right.

~

I grabbed the giant golden knocker and slammed it against the door a few times. I smoothed my hair and clothes while I was waiting, looking about everywhere.

The door opened up to a smiling Liam. I smiled back at the warm greeting.

"Come on in. Niall and I were just chilling in the theater room." He ushered me in and closed the door. He gave me a bear hug and kissed me on the cheek.

I followed him through his house until we reached a set of black double doors. He opened one of them and let me walk in first.

The room was dark and there was a giant projection screen on the wall, it was playing Batman: The Dark Knight. It looked like an actual miniature movie theater. I could barely make out Niall sitting in one of the first rows, towards the other end of the room. He turned around to look at us when he saw the light from the open door and got up to come hug me.

"Hey!" He smiled as he approached me, giving me a big hug and picking me up for a second, making me giggle.

"You guys watching a movie?" I asked, looking at the screen.

"Yep. But we've seen this one a million times. Hanging out with you is way more fun!" Liam draped his arm around me and led me out of the room.

We wound up in his bedroom, Liam sitting on his bed and Niall sitting next to me on the couch.

We all joked around and talked about whatever for a while before Niall stood up and said he was going to get a drink.

"Anyone want anything while I'm down there?" He pointed to both of us.

"Nope." We said in unison, making us laugh.

Niall gave us a thumbs up and walked out.

Me and Liam sat in a comfortable silence for a few seconds.

If I tell him, I'll feel better. Surely he can give me some advice or something. I reassured myself.

"Liam, can I tell you something?" I asked timidly, looking at the ground.

He sat up on the bed and looked at me with a funny face. "Of course you can. I'm always here if you need to talk."

"It's just something that happened today at school. It's really not a big deal, I'm just confused as to how I feel about it." I told him.

"Mhmm. Maybe I can help you sort out your feelings. What is it?" He got up and sat next to me on the couch.

"Well, um..." I tripped over my words, now aware of what I was going to have to tell him.

Maybe I'll just leave out the details.

"Um, today during free period, I went to the library and I ran into Harry there. He…kind of…kissed me. But, I kind of enjoyed it. How is that possible?" I asked while looking at the floor, blushing at my own words.

He was silent in thought for a second.

"I see. And that's all that happened?" He quizzed, looking at me.

"Uh, well...no." I confessed.

"What else happened? You can tell me, Eilana. I'm not going to judge you, and I'm not going to tell anyone."

"He, um, he grabbed my...bottom." I could feel the heat rising to my cheeks.

"Oh. Well, did you enjoy that?" He asked.

"Liam!" I squealed, embarrassed.

"Sorry! I didn't mean it like that! I was just asking so I can answer your question. I didn’t mean to sound like a creep." He chuckled.

"...No. It hurt. He grabbed me really hard. I don't think he knows what gentle means." I commented.

"Not really, no. But that's just how Harry is. He's never had anyone be gentle to him his entire life so, no he doesn't really get it." He explained.

I just stared at the floor blankly, almost feeling sorry for him.

"Anyways, this kiss, did you resist it?"

"Of course I did! But he had me in a hold where I couldn't get away. So, it wound up lasting a pretty long time. And I have to admit, he's a pretty great kisser. But how can I think something like that about someone I hate so much?"

"Well, you're a teenage girl. It's normal for you to feel that way about it. Especially if they're a good kisser. Sometimes it doesn't matter how much you like or dislike someone, if they're good sexually, it's natural to like it. So if you're worried that you're starting to like Harry, don't be. It's just human instinct to think that way." He explained, finishing with a smile.

He's right. That makes sense...

I made eye contact with him for a split second and averted my eyes again, horribly embarrassed about all of this.

"Don't be embarrassed, Eilana. It's normal. Like I said." He laughed at my reddening face.

When I didn't say anything he just pulled me into a hug, still laughing. I smiled after a while and slapped him on the arm.

"Stop laughing at me!" I whined like a child. It just made him laugh even more.

I started hitting him all over as he was trying, and succeeding, at blocking me. Niall walked in on this scene, and stopped to stare for a second, thinking over what was going on here. We stopped and looked at him. After a few seconds of silence, we all just started laughing.

Niall walked over and sat down on the other side of me. "So, you comin' to the party tonight?" He asked.

"Party? What party?" I looked back and forth between them.

"Didn't Liam tell you?" He asked, looking confused.

"I was just about to ask her actually."

Niall just gave him a doubtful look and rolled his eyes. "A guy from school is having a massive party tonight, it's gonna to be the craic. Wanna come?" He asked, taking a sip of his pepsi.

"Oh. Um, I don't know guys, I'm not really much of a party person. And I'm not going to know anyone there anyway. I mean, it's all people from school anyway, right? No one is going to like me being there..."

Niall jerked towards me, a sad expression on his face. "Aw! Come on, Eilana! We'll be there! You know us! It'll be fun!" He argued.

"I don't know. It's just not really my scene, guys."

Niall grabbed my hand and looked me in the eyes, making a pouty face. "Look, I'll stay with you the whole night. I promise. Just please come with us! It'll be fun!" He pleaded.

Ugh. Don't look at me like that.

I looked over to Liam, who was also making a puppy dog face. The puppy dog face to end all puppy dog faces.

"...Fine!" I groaned, rolling my eyes. "But if at any time I feel uncomfortable, or threatened, I will leave." I warned them.

They nodded their heads in understanding, and then tackled me in a hug. I couldn't help but smile.

Well, this night isn't going to end well.

Chapter Text

I finished putting my makeup on and inspected my hair again. I had actually bothered to fix it for once.

I had convinced the boys that if I was going to go to this party, I was going to look good. So they brought me back to my house so I could get ready. They were currently waiting on me in the living room.

I peeled off my clothes from earlier and searched my closet for something to wear. I decided on my black, pink, and yellow floral skinny jeans, and a flowy, pastel yellow blouse. I put my black leather jacket on over it and slipped into my black loafers with gold studs.

I was picking out some jewelry when I heard my phone buzz from my vanity. I grabbed it and looked at the screen.

Lou-bear

I would love to hang tonight but unfortunately I have plans. Do you think you'll be okay being alone for tonight?

He has no clue that I've been hanging out with these two. A part of me felt terrible for not telling him, but there was really no reason to. I was safe with them.

Yeah that's fine. I think I'll be okay for one night. ;) Have fun! xx

I stuffed the phone in my jeans pocket and exited my room, only to be met with Niall and Liam standing outside of my door.

When they saw me their eyes got wide and started wandering.

Niall had a huge grin on his face. "Eilana, you look...stunning." He commented.

I felt myself blush and looked down. "Thank you, Niall. I didn't turn out looking as good as I wanted to but..."

"Niall is right, you look absolutely gorgeous!" Liam added. "I mean, you were before, but, wow." He raised his eyebrows at me.

I continued to stare at the floor. "Thank you, Liam. That's very sweet." I smiled, tucking my hair behind my ear.

"Sooo, ready to go?" Liam asked the both of us.

"Yep." I told him. Niall just nodded his head.

We all got into Niall's car and headed off toward the party.

~

When we arrived, it was already going full scale. The house it was being held at was massive. It looked to be about the size of Liam's.

The music was booming from outside the house even, and the smell of alcohol and smoke was thick. I could tell before we even got through the front door that I had made a mistake coming here tonight.

Maybe if I just stick with Niall and Liam I'll stay out of trouble.

I guess everyone was too wasted to even notice who I was, because I wasn't getting snobby stares like I thought I would.

We were getting stopped by people left and right. I know Niall and Liam are popular but it seemed as though everyone wanted to talk to them. I'm not about to believe they knew that many people. Still, they stopped and talked to every one of them.

The girls either didn't recognize me, or they didn't even see me. Although I was getting some looks from the guys. It made me uncomfortable, even though I couldn't help but to smirk mentally.

We were trying to make our way to the kitchen to get drinks I assume, but that was proving more difficult than it sounded.

We were having to weave our way through the crowds of people lining the halls. It looks like everyone in town had showed up.

I managed to catch a glimpse of the rest of the party. It was a mad house. There was a DJ on a small stage in what looked to be the living room, and there was people skateboarding through, and around, the house. I looked to the far end of the house through the glass wall to see a giant pool with people jumping in with all their clothes on, and plenty of tables with food and alcohol lined the patio.

I rolled my eyes at the sight of so many drunk people making fools of themselves. Not to mention all the sex that was going on around us.

We finally made it into the kitchen and Niall poured himself a drink, Liam joining him.

"What do you want to drink?" Niall asked me.

"Oh, no. I don't drink." I smiled sheepishly at him.

It wasn't because I wasn't allowed, I just wasn't really big into it. Like I said, this is not my kind of scene.

He smiled back at me. "Not even one?" He asked again.

Liam looked up from the counter. "Don't pressure her. If she doesn't want to, that's fine." Liam defended me.

I smiled at him sweetly, getting one back. "Thank you Liam. It's just not really my thing. Never interested me." I explained to Niall.

"Hey that's fine! I was just asking. You know I wouldn't make you do something you didn't want to, right?" He looked at me with a questioning face.

"Yeah, I know. Thanks for that."

He nodded his head in reply. "Well, can I get you anything else?" He raised his eyebrow at me, making me laugh.

"I think a soda will do, thank you." I put my palms on the counter and leaned in, waiting for my drink.

Niall poured me one and gave it to me, winking. "Here you go, darlin."

I thanked him and let him grab my hand, leading me to some other room, Liam already long gone.

I just stood behind Niall quietly for a while, sipping my drink as he talked to people. I soon discovered Harry and Zayn were here too. They were talking to Niall at one point, although they didn't say a word to me. I don't even think they saw me. I stayed behind Niall the whole time and kept my head down. Of course the fact that they were both slam drunk probably helped too.

Upon closer inspection, I saw that there were quite a few people here that weren't from school. Also, a lot of cute guys I had never seen before. One of which was friends with Niall.

"And who is this pretty little thing, Niall? You got a girl now?" He asked loud enough for me to hear. I blushed at his implying that Niall and I were dating.

Niall turned around and put his arm around my waist, pulling me forward. "Oh, no. We're just good friends." He shouted over the music, grinning at me.

His friend smiled upon hearing the news and took my hand, kissing it, his stare never leaving my eyes.

"Well, it is very nice to meet you, Niall's good friend. I'm Thomas." He introduced himself with a charming smile.

I just giggled, suddenly feeling nervous.

I scanned over him quickly, taking in his shaggy, dark brown hair and his hazel eyes. His face was still displaying a knock out smile, showcasing perfect white teeth. He was dressed very nicely as well.

"May I ask your name, lovely?"

I snapped out of it and shook my head slightly. "Eilana."

"Eilana. I've never heard that name before. It's beautiful, as is the owner." He winked at me.

I giggled again. "Thank you." I smiled at the floor.

He made small chat with me for a few minutes before someone called him over.

"It seems I'm needed elsewhere. Good seeing you, man. I'll catch you around." He said goodbye to Niall, bumping fists with him.

He turned to me with a smile, leaning down to me. "I hope I'll be seeing you around as well, Eilana." He kissed my hand again, and within a second he disappeared into the crowd.

"He's seems nice." I commented to Niall.

Niall scoffed. "Yeah, he's a cool guy, pretty nice lad too. But I would advise you to stay away from him. He's trouble, Eilana." He warned seriously.

"Trouble. Got it." I smiled and rolled my eyes.

Please. He was totally harmless.

"Trust me, Eilana. It's in your best interest. I'm just looking out for you." He grabbed my hand again, leading me farther into the living room where the music was the loudest.

People were crowding the dance floor. I could feel the body heat just by standing to the side of it. I spotted a trash can and threw my empty cup in it, Niall following.

I looked around some more. This place was huge, and it was still crowded with people. There had to be hundreds here.

I'm not going to lie, although this wasn't my thing, this party was pretty awesome. I can't even imagine the money it took to throw it.

I spotted a lot of familiar faces, but there was one that stopped me in my tracks.

Across the room and just through the open archway, stood Louis. Thankfully he wasn't looking this way.

Oh shit! Oh shit! If he knew I was here, he would be furious! He would never let me come to something so dangerous unless I came with him.

I quickly tugged on Niall's shoulder. He looked down at me with a questioning face and leaned down so he could hear me.

"Louis is here! I can't let him see me! If he finds out I'm here, I'm going to be in so much trouble!" I shouted into his ear over the thudding of the music.

He looked around and stopped when he spotted Louis. He looked at me and nodded his head, taking my hand. He put his lips to my ear again. "Wanna dance? He won't be able to see you in there." He gestured to the dance floor.

I blushed at his question, and at the embarrassing fact that I was a girl that couldn't dance. I hadn't even been on a dance floor before.

I tugged on his shoulder again, and stood on my tiptoes to reach his ear. "I-I can't dance." I shied away as soon as I said it.

I saw him laugh lightly and smile at me, dragging me to the dance floor anyway.

"It's easy. Let me teach you." He dragged me to the middle of the floor where he was sure no one outside of it could see us, and began dancing.

I just stood still awkwardly, looking around for a few seconds before Niall laughed and took my hands, pulling me closer to him.

He let go and put his hands on my hips, signaling to sway to the music. I started doing as he instructed, and soon I felt more comfortable being out there.

As I got the hang of it, Niall spun me around and pulled me even closer to him. Our bodies were making contact as we swayed to the music. I smiled at his bold action, not minding. I honestly wasn't expecting this kind of dancing when he asked me to dance. But I didn't mind at all.

The longer we danced, the closer we got, until our bodies were flat against the other. His hands were placed on my hips, mine resting over them. My head was laid back on his shoulder, and I could hear him singing to the song every now and again. I could feel his body heat on my back as we grinded into each other.

After a little while he turned me around and smiled down at me. I smiled back as we continued dancing. I don't know where this new found confidence I had was coming from. I pushed myself up against him and put my arms around his neck. I must have looked like the other girls right now, but I didn't care. I was having fun.

Niall looked so sexy right now. My crush on him has only gotten worse since we became friends. I just wish he liked me back, because I really just wanted to kiss him right now. He looked perfect. And the little smirk he had on his face. Ugh. I couldn't look away.

I started questioning my sanity when suddenly he kissed me.

I kissed back, still not sure if this was my imagination or not. I was fire hot and my mind was clouded with music, I didn't know what was going on anymore, but I liked it.

My hand traveled up into his hair, deepening the kiss. He placed his hand on the small of my back, and the other cupped my neck.

This boy can kiss, that's for sure. He knows what he’s doing.

We broke away and made eye contact for a second before both looking at the floor. Suddenly, that confidence I had, was gone.

"Sorry." He apologized, rubbing the back of his neck.

I shook my head no and smiled at him, letting him know it was okay. A small smile crept onto his face.

I leaned over and told him I was thirsty. He nodded and grabbed my hand, leading me back to the kitchen.

As we approached the drinks, someone tapped me on the shoulder. I turned around to see it was Louis. My eyes widened and my breath hitched in my throat. Niall turned around as well, looking from me to Louis, giving me an apologetic face.

"Can I borrow her for a minute? I'll bring her right back to you." He asked Niall, sneering in the process.

Niall looked at Louis with a disapproving face, not sure if he should allow it or not. He looked to me and I gave him a face telling him it was okay.

Louis grabbed my arm and looked at Niall. "We'll be right back."

He dragged me upstairs and down the hall, looking for an empty room. When he found one, he pushed me into it and shut the door. He turned around and looked at me.

"Eilana Alice Stockridge! What the bloody hell are you doing here?!" He asked loudly.

I just looked at the floor and rubbed my arm.

"Well?!" He pressed.

"I-I um, I'm just here with some friends, Louis. I'm fine." I said quietly.

"Just here with some friends?! What friends?! You know what? I don't care who you're here with! The problem is that you're here at all! And what the hell were you doing with Horan?!" He yelled.

"I'm sorry Louis. I'm jus-"

"Do you understand how dangerous it is here?! Do you have any idea how dangerous it is for a girl as innocent and small as yourself?! What were you thinking?! Have you gone mad?!" He yelled again.

"Yes I do, but I-"

"I don't care, Eilana! If you know it's dangerous then you shouldn't be here right now! There is no excuse!"

That was it. He wasn't even listening to me. I was infuriated.

"Would you just listen to me?!" I yelled out. He went quiet and looked shocked.

"I know it's dangerous here, but I came here with two very capable friends of mine. They can, and will protect me. I didn't even drink anything! Dammit, Louis! I can take care of myself!"

He just laughed sarcastically. "No, Eilana. You can't take care of yourself. That's what I'm here for. And who in the hell are these "friends" you speak of?"

I rolled my eyes before answering. "Niall and Liam." I stated blandly.

He scoffed at me. "Niall and Liam? Harry's friends? Oh yeah, I'm sure they're trustworthy! Why don't you just go stand in a dark alleyway if you're so intent on getting raped? Are you fucking mental, Eilana?! Since when were you friends with Harry and his bunch?"

"For your information, I'm not friends with Harry, or Zayn. It's just me, Niall, and Liam. And we've been friends for a while now. They're very trustworthy, and they've proven it! They are perfect gentlemen, and good friends! And all the while you've been out with your other friends, sulking over our fights, I was hanging out with them! You were just too distant to notice!"

He just stared at me quiet for a second, before his face grew angry and he lashed out at me.

"And you didn't even tell me?! Why in the hell would you lie to me about something like that?! I have a right to know these things! I was the only friend in your life for a long time! I deserve some respect dammit! Why do you keep hiding things from me?!" He looked away and ran his fingers through his hair. "Seeing you here tonight, it makes me wonder what other things you've been doing behind my back."

"Louis! You don't really think I'm that kind of person, do you?! You know me! I'm not like that! The only things I've kept from you, I was keeping because I knew you would blow it out of proportion, just like you're doing now. And believe me, nothing I'm keeping from you has anything to do with what you're thinking!" I crossed my arms.

"Well what am I supposed to think?! You're sneaking around to parties behind my back!"

"Oh give me a break, Louis! This is the first damn party I've ever come to! And I was not sneaking around behind your back! You just never asked me what I did when you weren't around! I never lied to you! Maybe if you cared about me a little more lately, you would have known! I would have told you if you'd just asked, ya know!" I threw my arms up in frustration.

"Oh, if I cared a little more?! Eilana, that's all I've been doing lately! But every time I try to look out for you, you get mad at me! I've been doing nothing but caring for you for almost the last two years of my life, Eilana! You have no idea how much I've given up for you! All I've done is care! And you don't even appreciate it! Of course I get pissy!" He yelled in my face, making me flinch slightly.

My hands were balled into fists and I was burning up, shaking in anger.

"Shut the fuck up Louis Tomlinson! I don't want to hear your bullshit anymore!" And with that I slapped him. With everything I had, I slapped him. I could already see the red mark on his cheek.

He turned his head back at me and looked me in the eye. His face was raging, and I was beginning to think slapping him wasn't such a smart move. But his reaction was what took me off guard. It was the last thing I expected.

He grabbed me by the arms and smashed his lips into mine. I was shocked but I still resisted him. I was still furious.

What the hell does he think he's doing?

I pushed and shoved, but he had a firm grip on me. His kiss was angry. Louis never kissed me like this before. I didn't like it. I wanted the sweet, gentle Louis back, but I had a feeling that he wasn't coming back.

I finally shoved my way away from him. I don't think I've ever been this angry before. I slapped him again. "I hate you, Louis! What happened to you?!" I screamed before running out of the room. I heard him running after me, but it was too late, I had already become part of the crowd.

At this point I started crying. It probably looked odd, a girl at a party running around crying. But I didn't care anymore. I didn't even look at where I was going. I just ran, pushing my way through people. I came to a stop when I ran straight into someone's back. I fell straight on my ass at the impact, but I didn't even bother getting up. I just stayed on the floor crying.

I heard a familiar voice from in front of me.

"Eilana? Are you okay?! What happened, love?!"

I looked up to see Liam was the one I had run into. He was crouching down at me now. I noticed everyone was looking at us, confusion scrawled on their faces.

"Eilana? Are you okay?" He asked again, putting his arm around me, helping me up.

I just nodded my head and tried to stop my crying. As soon as I was up I hugged Liam, burying my face in his chest. He picked me up and carried me into the room behind him, away from all the noise. He set me down on the bed, sitting next to me.

"Calm down, love. Tell me what happened." He lifted my chin, wiping away my tears.

I told him what happened all the way from Louis, Niall, and I in the kitchen. He just listened quietly, nodding every so often and wiping away any stray tears. When I was done, he pulled me into a hug, rubbing my arms soothingly.

"What am I going to do now Liam? I think I just lost my best friend." I asked, sadness still thick in my voice.

"Well, I can't tell you what's going to happen between you and Louis, but I can tell you, that I'll be here for you through all of it. I'm going to be here as a best friend, and I promise you, I won't leave you." He kissed my temple and pulled me into another hug.

"Thank you, Liam."

"I'm so sorry, love. If I could fix it, I would. I'm sorry this had to happen." He rubbed my shoulder with his thumb.

"Maybe it's better this way. He's not the same person anymore anyway. The Louis I knew was gone some time ago. It was bound to happen, I just didn't see it coming." I tried to convince myself more than him.

"Maybe you're right. You never know."

I shook my head and pushed the urge to cry to the back of my mind, smiling instead.

"Are you going to be okay? Do you want me to take you home?" He asked sweetly.

"No. I wanna stay. I'm not going to let him ruin everything for me. And I'm certainly not going to ruin your night." I told him.

He smiled and laughed lightly. "You wouldn't be ruining my night, Eilana. I'm more concerned about you." He stated.

"Well, I still want to stay." I said defiantly.

He rolled his eyes and laughed at my sudden attitude. "Alright, alright. Come on." He led me out of the room and towards the bathroom.

I checked myself in the mirror. I looked horrible. I had cried almost all of my makeup off. Even though Liam assured me I was still beautiful, I felt like shit.

"Whatever." I muttered to myself as I exited the bathroom with Liam.

~

Louis' P.O.V

"I hate you, Louis! What happened to you?!" She screamed, running out. I was shocked.

Did she really just say that?

Her words were like knives to me. That's the one thing I never wanted to hear her say.

I came back to my senses and ran after her, but it was too late, she had already disappeared.

Fuck! I'm such an idiot!

I kept running after her anyway. She could have gone anywhere in this giant house. After a few minutes of looking for her, I realized it was pointless. So I decided to look for someone else. Someone who was also responsible for this situation. And I knew exactly where I could find him.

I pushed my way downstairs, there I saw him, walking out of the kitchen. I made my way over to him as he was walking away, and grabbed his shoulder, spinning him around.

"Niall. Just who I was looking for."

He gave me a confused glare and looked around me. "Where's Eilana?" He asked angrily.

"Calm down leprechaun, she's okay. Which brings me back to why I'm talking to you in the first place." I told him.

He looked at me expectantly, waiting.

"Stay away from Eilana. I don't want to see you with her again." I threatened.

He raised an eyebrow and sneered at me, laughing. "You're asking me to stay away from her? I should be asking you that." He replied.

"I'm not asking. I'm telling. Don't take my words lightly." I seethed.

He laughed again. "What are you on about, mate? Can't we both just be friends with her? She's happy with that, so let's just leave it, shall we?"

"Sure, Horan. You want to be her friend, huh?"

"I am her friend." He fired back simply.

"I'm not a damn fool! Don't think I don't know what you're up to! I'm not about to let that shit happen right before my eyes!" I grabbed his shirt in both hands and shoved him against the wall.

"What the hell are you talking about?" He asked rather calmly for his situation.

"Don't you come up in here and act like you care about her! I know you're just looking for a good fuck! You disgust me! You and all your friends are grade A pricks!"

He pushed me off of him and gave me a once over, looking at me like I was insane. "Who the hell told you that?! I do care about Eilana! Don't you ever say I don't! I'm a much better friend to her than you are! You of all people have no right saying who cares about her and who doesn't!" He spat. "Judging by the way you've been treating her lately, I'd say you don't deserve her friendship!"

"Who the hell are you to judge my friendship with Eilana?! You don't know anything about what's going on between us!" I yelled back.

"That's where you're wrong! I do know! Eilana tells me everything! You know why?! Because I'm there for her! I'm her friend! And where are you when she's hurting because of you?! Out somewhere else, taking her for granted! You had the most precious, selfless, sweet girl at your side, and you took her for granted! Dammit, Tomlinson!" I could see him shaking with anger.

"That's none of your business, Horan! I'm not going to repeat myself again! Stay the fuck away from her, or I swear you'll regret it!"

He sneered and looked me in the eye, leaning closer. "Make me, you little shit!"

~

Eilana's P.O.V

Liam and I were walking around and checking out the party, stopping to talk to his friends. After a little while he said he needed to go to the bathroom really quick. I followed him and waited outside the door, like he told me to.

Not five seconds after I had been standing there, I saw Thomas walk up.

"Hey there, beautiful. What are you doing standing alone?" He smirked.

I could smell the alcohol on his breath. "Waiting on someone." I replied bluntly, looking around.

"Well, you can meet up with them later. What's say we spend some time together, huh?

He grabbed my arm and started dragging me somewhere. I pulled with everything I had. It didn't stop him, but it slowed him down.

"Oh come on!" He tugged harder. I planted my feet into the ground and kept pulling.

I looked back and saw the bathroom door getting farther and farther away. Suddenly it opened and out came Liam, looking around for me.

"Liam! Liam help!" I screamed in his direction.

He saw me and ran over as fast as he could, pushing people and knocking them over.

"What the hell do you think you're doing, mate!?" Liam grabbed me and jerked me away from Thomas, pushing me behind him.

"None of your business, you twat!" Thomas spit at Liam loudly.

Liam laughed at his drunkeness, and pulled back, punching him square in the jaw.

Thomas stumbled back, holding his jaw, looking at Liam like he was crazy, and then made a run for it.

Liam turned to me, looking me over. "You okay?"

I nodded my head, hugging him. "Thank you Liam."

Suddenly, everyone in the room started rushing outside. It was an absolute swarm, almost knocking me over. Liam shielded me from all the people coming our way.

"Liam what's happening?!" I clung to him, scared about what was going on.

"I don't know, but it'll be okay. I'm right here." He shushed me, petting my hair.

Someone stopped next to us. "Aren't you guys going to see what's happening outside?!" They asked excitedly, and ran off.

"Outside?" I looked up at Liam.

He shook his head not knowing what they were talking about either, and led me outside.

When I saw what was going on, my eyes widened and my body tensed up, stopping right where I was.

Louis and Niall were rolling around on the ground in a fist fight. They were both dripping blood and both swinging at the other.

"Liam! Stop them!" I ran forward before I even gave him a chance to do anything. He caught me and set me behind him before running into the fight.

I saw someone else run in at the same time. I couldn't make out who it was though. Liam grabbed Niall, who was currently on top of Louis, and dragged him away. The other person, who I could now tell was Harry, pulled Louis away. They were both kicking and screaming at the other still.

What is Harry doing with Louis? Are they friends now or something?

Despite what happened earlier, I was still worried about Louis. But I was worried about Niall too.

Liam dragged Niall over to me. He finally stopped struggling when he saw me.

He looked horrible. He already had a black eye forming, and his knuckles were all bloody. His nose was a waterfall of blood, and from what I could tell under all the blood, his lip was split pretty bad too.

"Niall! Are you okay?!" I screeched as I ran for him, pulling him into a hug.

"He's fine. Just needs to clean up a bit." Liam answered for him.

"Niall say something!" I demanded frantically.

"Don't. You'll get blood all over your pretty clothes." He coughed out as he pushed me away gently.

Well, too late for that.

He smiled at me, letting me know he was alright. I sighed in relief and rubbed my forehead.

"I'll be right back. I'm just going to check on Louis and then we're leaving, got it?" I asked Liam.

"Okay." He agreed, helping Niall walk to the car.

I walked across the yard, seeing Louis sitting in a chair with his back to me, Harry standing and talking to him.

I walked up slowly, feeling a bit awkward with the situation, Harry being there and all.

I circled around to see his face. He looked up at me through his eyelashes for a second, before dropping his gaze back to the ground.

"Are you okay?" I asked hesitantly.

He also looked horrible. He was bleeding all down his face. It seemed to be coming from his head. He had a large gash above his right eyebrow that was also bleeding pretty bad, and I could see the bruises already forming on his face.

"He's fine." Harry said gruffly.

I glared at him. "I see you've been making friends behind my back as well." I aimed at Louis before storming off towards Niall's car.

He's okay, Eilana. Just don't worry about it. He can take care of himself.

I made it to the car to see Liam in the drivers’ seat and Niall in the back. I climbed into the back with Niall and picked his head up gently, laying it in my lap. He sat up quickly.

"You'll get blood all over you!" He exclaimed, holding his head.

I smiled and pulled him back down, kissing him on the forehead. "It's okay, Niall. That's not important to me right now." I told him, running my fingers through his hair.

He looked at me for a while before smiling at me and closing his eyes.

Liam drove to Niall's house, helping him inside. He came back out a few minutes later, getting back in the car.

"Is he going to be okay?" I asked again.

Liam smiled reassuringly at me and started the car. "His parents will take care of him. They're used to this. He'll be just fine."

The ride to my house was comfortably quiet.

He got out and opened the door for me, helping me out and walking me to the door.

"Thank you, Liam. Really, I mean it. You always seem to be helping me with something. I wish I could do something to help you." I frowned down at the keys in my hand.

"You need not worry about it, love. I'm here to help. I like helping you. So don't feel bad about it, okay?" He grabbed my hand and kissed it. I just nodded in response.

I blushed as he looked into my eyes. "I'm sorry about tonight. About everything. If there's anything I can do, just let me know. Please." He rubbed my hand with his thumb.

"Thank you, Liam." I hugged him.

He snickered and looked down at me. "I seem to get that a lot recently. But it never gets old." He joked.

I laughed at him and hit him lightly on the arm.

"Get some sleep, love. You've had a rough night." He winked and poked my cheek playfully, turning and walking away.

I smiled and reached for the door when I was spun around suddenly. Liam leaned down and kissed me on the lips for a few seconds before pulling away, showing a toothy grin, and getting in the car and driving off.

After I stood shocked for a minute, I walked inside and got a shower and into bed.

I knew going was a bad idea. Why didn't I go with my gut feeling? I don't even know what's going on anymore. Who am I kidding, I haven't known what was going on since the beginning. This night was certainly eventful, I can't argue that. Niall and Liam both kissed me, and I lost my best friend. The worst part is, I can't tell if my life is getting better or worse...

Chapter Text

As I walked the halls of school, I was getting lots of cold stares. Well, more than usual. Everyone that had been at the party a few nights ago, blamed me for everything that happened. But I suppose they're right. I was the one at the center of all the drama. And now because of me, two of the schools most loved boys, were covered in cuts and bruises.

Not to mention the fact that the girls were all furious that they weren't fighting over them instead. Just more fuel to add to the hate fire.

But what made me angrier than anything, was the fact that they all thought I didn't care what I had done. That I was guilt free and getting on with my life. They didn't know a damn thing. They didn't know just how bad I felt about it, they didn't know I lost my best friend, they didn't know what I was going through. They didn't know, that every night since that night, I have cried myself to sleep.

They didn't care anyway. I was just the poor girl, my life and my problems were insignificant, and so were my tears. Yeah, I was used to it. I have to be. To get by. I know I'm unimportant, I have to accept it sometime.

As I settled into my first class of the day with Louis, I noticed he wasn't here. Again. Ever since the night of the party, he hasn't showed up to school once. As much as I wanted to call him a coward, I was silently thankful. I couldn't face him yet. I know I would break down in tears, and that's the last thing I wanted.

I felt so alone at school not having Louis with me. Even though Niall and Liam were almost always with me since that night, I still felt a bit lonely. I guess it was because ever since I had been coming to this school, Louis had always been with me. He approached me on day one, and ever since then, we've been friends.

It's not that having Niall and Liam with me didn't make things better, because they did make things easier. And they tried to keep my mind off of Louis as best they could but, every time I looked at Niall, it reminded me of Louis. Only because Niall was scuffed up like him though. That was all. And soon, that would go away.

I breathed a sigh of relief and looked to Niall sitting on the other side of the room. He grinned at me, giving a short wave. I smiled back and looked away. He still looked pretty rough, but he was getting better. I kind of feel bad for saying it but, now that I knew he was okay, he actually looked pretty sexy all scuffed up like that. He still wouldn't tell me what that fight was about though. Somehow, I had a feeling Louis started it.

~

At lunch, Liam and Niall opted to sit with me instead of Harry and Zayn. They've been sitting at my table since the party, and I very much appreciated it. The stares seemed a little less harsh when they were around.

"How's your face?" I asked Niall as he sat down next to me.

He chuckled and nudged me with his shoulder. "I'll live."

I rolled my eyes. "Seriously, Niall." I put my fork down and looked at him.

He popped open his soda can and shrugged his shoulders. "I'm fine, really. Knowing that it was for you seems to make it all hurt less."

I raised my eyebrow at him as he took a bite of his food. "So the fight was about me." I muttered.

He stopped what he was doing and looked around, turning to me and flashing a quick smile. "Love you!" He said in a sing-song voice, nudging me again and kissing me on the cheek, trying to get out of it.

I rolled my eyes at him and decided to ignore it. Just then Liam sat down on the other side of me.

"Hello." He greeted as he put his arm around me, pulling me into a short hug.

I smiled at him and took a sip of my drink. "So, I see we're still getting a lot of stares." I commented, looking around to see all the girls looking at us and talking or whispering about us.

They never got over Louis sitting with me, they did the same thing. And now that I've got two popular boys at my table, it caused a bigger stir.

"Just ignore them, Eilana. Their opinion means as much as a flea's." Liam told me.

"But you're one of them." I stated. As soon as the words left my mouth, I wished I could take them back. My face dropped. "I didn't mean it like that, Liam."

Liam paused for a moment, before looking at me. "I know what you meant. It's okay. I might have more money than I need, but I assure you I'm not one of them. I'm nothing like them." He smiled at me and went on eating.

I sighed and dropped my fork again and put my hands over my face. I heard Liam chuckle slightly.

"Hey now." He nudged me with his elbow. "I told you it's okay. Don't worry about it, I'm not mad. I know you didn't mean it like that." He reassured.

When I didn't respond, he pulled my hands away from my face. "It's okay." He grinned goofily at me.

I groaned and looked up. "No it's not, Liam. This is my problem. I fuck everything up, and then everyone leaves me. I don't even know how to speak without offending someone."

He grabbed my hands again. "Look at me." He commanded.

I just sighed, looking at my plate.

"Look at me, Eilana."

I looked at him slowly.

"What have I told you? I'm not going to leave you. I'm right here. It's going to take you killing me before I'll leave you, okay? Besides, you didn't offend me. Don't. Worry. About it." He laughed.

I felt a little better, but I lost my appetite. All of this drama was sickening. Weren't these supposed to be the best years of my life? Hah. Bullshit.

Niall turned to me, looking a little taken aback by my outburst. "Look, take it from me, Liam doesn't say anything he doesn't mean. If he says he'll be there, he'll be there. And me too. I'll always be here for you. No matter what you need, you can come to me." He gave me a sweet grin.

I couldn't help but smile. I pulled them both into a hug and kissed them both on the cheek. "Thanks you guys. I'm so lucky to have made such good friends. I don't know what I would do without you both."

"It's us who are lucky, darlin. Now eat your food or you're going to blow away with the wind." Niall told me.

Liam and I laughed. "I'm not going to blow away with the wind, Niall. I'm hardly skin and bones." I rolled my eyes at his ridiculous comment.

"No, you're not. But that's a good thing. You're perfect just the way you are. Now eat." He continued to munch on his food.

I rolled my eyes again and shoved a forkful of food in my mouth.

"Oh look, if it isn't the drama slut."

I looked up to see Harry standing on the other side of the table. "What do you want, Harry?" I snapped.

He smirked at me and ruffled his curls. "One boy wasn't enough, huh? But it looks like you couldn't manage three, as demonstrated at the party. So you just settled for two, then?" He gestured at Liam and Niall.

"Hey, woah. Who the hell are you to call Eilana a slut?!" Niall defended.

"It's okay, Niall. I've got this." I told him, scowling at Harry.

"Whatever you're on about, I'm sure it's just some rumor. That you started, no doubt. I don't know where you get your information, but I don't have any "guys" thank you very much. I'm a single pringle." I corrected him.

"Gee, I wonder why?" He put his finger to his chin in mock wonder.

"Because there's too many asshole's like you in this world. That's why." I retorted.

"You're talking about Louis, aren't you?" He smirked, wiggling his eyebrows.

I just went quiet at the mention of his name, only giving Harry a look from hell. Niall put his arms around me, comforting and protecting me.

"Oh, I'm sorry. Touchy subject?" He mocked in a baby voice, leaning over the table.

Liam stood up and smacked the table. "Okay, Harry. That's enough! Leave. Now." Liam warned through gritted teeth.

"It's okay, Liam." I told him with a voice so quiet and broken it could barely be heard.

"No! It's not okay. Harry you have no right to treat her like this! Or anyone for that matter! I understand what you're going through, but dammit it's not a free pass to treat people like shit!" He roared, eyes burning with anger.

Harry looked shocked. He just laughed at Liam's words and shoved his hands in his pockets. "Liam I don't thi-"

"No, Harry! You're not going to give me one of your bullshit excuses! She's had enough! I've had enough! We've all had enough! You need to take a step back and look at yourself! Walk away right now, or limp away later." Liam threatened.

I noticed everyone was looking at us. Waiting for another fight to go down, I'm sure.

Harry's eyes were wide and his mouth was slightly parted. I've never seen him looked so shocked. He finally just scoffed and walked out.

Everyone turned back around in their seats and an immediate uproar could be heard as Harry exited.

I looked over to Liam. He was still standing and his hands were clenched into fists so tight, his knuckles were white.

"Liam, it's okay now. Sit down." I told him, pulling him down gently. "You didn't have to do that." I pulled him into a hug.

"Yes I did. I've been meaning to tell him that for a while now, but I could never bring myself to say it. But because of you, I finally had a reason. He needs to hear it." He sighed.

"I guess you're right. There's a lot of things he needs to hear, but no one is going to tell him."

~

I shut the door behind me and kicked off my shoes. I laid down on the couch and stared at the ceiling.

I told the guys I would meet up with them later today, but I needed time to think right now.

Should I forgive Louis? Is he right somehow? Why is he being like this? I want the old Louis back. But I have Niall and Liam now. They're pretty great. It's just not the same though. I wonder why? Did I love Louis? Am I in love with Louis still? Or am I just young? Every young girl thinks she's in love when she's really not, right? Can you love more than one person? Ugh! Things are only getting more jumbled.

I smacked my forehead and closed my eyes. A few seconds later, there was a knock on the door. I lifted my head and looked at the front door. I groaned and got up.

I told those boys that I would call them when I was ready to hang out.

I unlocked the door and opened it. My face fell at what I saw before me.

"Louis? What are you doing here?"

Chapter Text

"Louis? What are you doing here?" I asked in confusion. He was the last person I expected to see at the door.

His face looked almost void of emotion. Besides the very few scratches and bruises that were left, he looked pretty normal. Tired maybe, but he seemed alright. He also appeared very calm. Not like him at all. He used to be emotionally and physically wrecked after we had the tiniest argument. When we did have one, anyway. Back then we never fought.

"I came to talk to you, what do you think?" His words sounded a bit on the sarcastic side.

I rolled my eyes at his tone.

I thought for a second that he might have changed back to himself, showing up like this. But when I heard his tone I slapped myself mentally for getting my hopes up so quickly. He just stared at me blankly. I decided that I wasn't going to deal with this. I started to shut the door on him. This was the last thing I needed right now.

He quickly stopped me, shoving him way into the house anyway, and shutting the door behind him.

"I can't believe you would shut me out like that. After everything I've done for you, and you're not even going to give me a chance to speak?" He spat angrily.

Hearing his voice was bittersweet. I had missed his voice. Although it wasn't what I expected to hear, it sounded different. I could tell it wasn't the same person. It used to be a comforting sound, but now it only brought stress.

"Fine, Louis. You're right. You deserve a chance to explain yourself." I crossed my arms, waiting to hear it.

I've got to be strong. No matter how much I just want to give him a hug and beg for the old Louis back, I have to play it like I'm over him. I can't break down now.

"Eilana, you have got to believe me when I say that those guys you're hanging out with are trouble. They're just going to use you and throw you to the side when they're done."

I scoffed at him. "That's what you came here to tell me? That? Nothing else?" I questioned coldly.

He shifted his eyes to both sides looking confused. "Yeah. What do you want me to say, Eilana?"

"I don't want you to say anything! I just want you to pull your head out of your ass and look around! You're being ridiculous! I don't know what your problem is lately, but you need to sort it out! Because whatever it is, it has single handedly ruined our friendship. Why can't you see how you're acting?"

"My problem? Hah! I'm not the one who suddenly started sneaking around and acting weirdly, keeping secrets from everybody! I've only been trying to keep you from hurting yourself! I know how it's going to end up with those boys, and you're not going to like it. Why can't you see that I'm just trying to protect you? Eilana, please. Listen to me." He grabbed me by the arms gently and tried to kiss me.

I turned my head and pushed him away. "Louis, we're going in circles. I don't know how to get you to see that you're looking at it all wrong! It's infuriating! Why don't you trust me anymore?" I heard my voice crack and I almost lost it.

He looked at me with confusion. "Eilana, it's them I don't trust. You know I trust you."

"Obviously you don't. Because if you did, you wouldn't be accusing me of sleeping around behind your back when you know for a fact that I've never slept with anyone. How dare you."

He laughed sarcastically and threw his hands up. "Well, you sure were ready to give it to me, now weren't you?"

My jaw dropped open. "That's different! You were different! I wouldn't have dared give it to another! Louis William Tomlinson, how dare you drop me to such a level!" I screamed at him. I didn't care about composure anymore.

"Oh, I was different? Is Niall different too? Or how about Liam? I bet they're both really different. They mean a lot to you don't they? Well, guess what? You mean a lot to me. You mean more to me than you ever will to both of them! Why can't you see that, Eilana?!" He grabbed me again, but I pushed and shoved away from him, hitting on his chest.

"Stop it! Just stop! All you talk about is how you're trying to protect me, but you don't see that you're the one that's hurting me! And now this?! Do you have any idea what you're words are doing to me? Do you?! You were different, Louis! Don't take my heart and smash it! I was so sure you weren't like an ordinary boy. I knew you wouldn't break my heart. But I was so wrong!" I finally said it. I finally told him, and now I was bawling my eyes out.

His face dropped into sorrow. "...Eilana, I'm so sorr-"

"No! Don't you dare say it, Louis Tomlinson! I don't want to hear those words from you! I don't want to hear it unless it's from the mouth of my friend. I don't know who you are anymore, but it's not him. You are blinded by anger! I don't know what happened to you, but it doesn't matter anymore. It happened and now it's changed you for the worse. You're no better than any other guy! I hope you know that!" I slumped down the wall and onto the floor, shaking uncontrollably.

I was crying so hard now. I didn't care anymore. It finally hit me. This was the end. This was the end of Louis and I. All of it. Louis was gone and he was never coming back to me. It honestly felt like my friend died.

Louis sat down beside me and pulled me into him and hugged me. He was silent for a little while, letting me cry.

"I just don't understand why you won't listen to me. Those guys are poison to you. Eilana, you have to believe me, please! Please." He begged.

Once I calmed myself enough to speak, I gave him one more chance.

"So you don't think you could be wrong about any of this at all? You don't think that I'm smart enough to make my own decisions and judgments?"

He sighed and put his forehead on mine. "Look, I'm sorry about the way I treated you at the party. But I know I'm not wrong about this! Why can't you see it? Eilana, stay away from them, or any other boys for that matter. It's only going to-"

"Stop! I don't want to hear anymore! They're my friends, Louis. Now get out." I stood up and walked to the door.

It's too late. I have to let him go. It will be better for both of us this way. I kept telling myself, trying not to cry again.

Louis just looked at me in shock. "What?"

"I said, get out. Clearly this is as far as we're going to go. If it worries you that much, then maybe it would be better if you didn't have to worry at all." I stared into the floor, hand on the doorknob.

"Eilana, you can't be serious? You're not saying we should end our friendship, are you?" He questioned, walking towards me.

"Yes, Louis, I am. And we are. I can't do this anymore. Please, Louis." I looked up into his eyes. They were the same shade of blue that they always were when he was upset. For just that second, I could see what little remained of my friend. It killed me inside.

I opened the door for him without another word. He sighed heavily and ran his hand through his hair. "I'm sorry I couldn't save you this time." He muttered. He tilted my chin up and gave me a long, sweet kiss. He looked at me only for a second before he walked out, not looking back.

I didn't even shut the door before I sank to the floor again and let out all my emotions into one silent cry. I just balled up and tucked my face between my knees, silently shaking.

I heard rapid footsteps approaching me. I didn't even look to see who they belonged to though. I didn't care. My whole world finally caved in around me. Just like I knew it would someday.

"Oh my- Eilana!" I heard the familiar voice as they put their arms around me, rocking me back and forth.

I breathed in his scent before registering that he was actually here. "Liam? Why are you here?" I went to wipe my tears but Liam beat me to it.

"I've been trying to call you for almost the last hour. When you weren't answering, I decided I better make sure you were okay. Good god you worried me to death!" He smothered me again.

"Sorry. I think I left my phone on silent." I answered. The sound of my voice was a bit frightening to me. I sounded empty. I guess I was.

"What happened?! Are you okay?! Why was Louis here? What did he do?" He questioned all at once. It made my head spin and all I heard was Louis. I immediately broke down again.

Liam started to panic. "It's okay, love. Please don't cry." He begged. He picked me up and carried me to the couch, setting me down beside him.

I clung to him, sobbing into his shirt. I don't know how long we stayed like that. Liam just let me cry it out, rubbing my shoulder with his thumb. Every now and then he would kiss my head and wipe away my tears.

"It's over, Liam. Louis and I are no more. I feel so empty." I finally told him.

"What did he say to you, Eilana? What did he do to make you this way?" He cupped my face and tilted it to look at him, rubbing it with his thumb. He looked so sad and confused. Like a lost puppy.

"He broke me. He broke me in a way that I'll never be put back together again. I trusted him. I thought he trusted me. But then I've never been good at guessing." I laughed lightly, even though I didn't find it funny at all.

Liam hugged me tighter to him. He hugged me as though somehow it would piece me back together.

"Do you still want to hang out? Maybe we can take your mind off of things for a little while?" He suggested.

I sighed.

All I want to do is roll off a cliff.

Maybe that's exactly what I needed though. Maybe they could help me.

~

I settled into one of the couches in Liam's home theater.

He told me to get into the most comfy clothes I had, and to grab my favorite blanket. So here I was, sitting in Liam's house wearing my red pajama shorts and an Avengers T. I decided to take off all of my makeup since I cried most of it off anyway, and I put my hair up into a messy bun.

I looked horrendous. Not to mention my eyes were all red from crying.

I heard Liam and Niall talking outside of the room. Liam was just explaining what happened earlier. A few minutes, and a few curse words from Niall later, I heard someone walk in.

Niall appeared in front of me, smiling gently as he sat down next to me. He hugged me and kissed me on the cheek. "You look beautiful." He grinned.

I rolled my eyes and chuckled. "Niall, please. I look hideous. Don't lie."

He scrunched up his face. "No you don't. I think you look beautiful right now. Sure you look pretty with makeup, but this way I can see your real face. And that's much more beautiful." He laced his fingers through mine and brought my hand up to his face, kissing it lightly.

My eyes watered up at his words. Niall made me feel beautiful. Something no one was ever able to do. I wasn't used to this feeling. It was strange. I couldn't control the smile on my lips as Niall stared at me, his eyes studying my face. Normally I would feel self-conscious, but the way Niall looked at me, I knew he wasn't lying.

After a short silence, a question came to me. "Where is Liam?"

"He went to the kitchen to get movie snacks. He'll be back any minute." He put his arm around me and I snuggled up to him with my blanket.

A few seconds later Liam entered the room, hands full of things. "Okay, I've got the popcorn, ice cream, candy, and soda." He announced as he set them all down.

We watched a marathon of our favorite movies that night. Even some Disney ones. We all fell asleep on each other in the middle of the night.

As much fun as I was having, and as much as I enjoyed spending time with them, I couldn't help but think about Louis every now and again.

Before I drifted off that night, my last thought was of him, just like it always was.

Chapter Text

I awoke that morning to find myself sandwiched between Liam and Niall. At least I think it was morning. This room was almost pitch black. I reached over Niall carefully, trying not to wake him, and grabbed my phone that had fallen on the floor. I looked at it to see that I had forty five minutes before I was supposed to be at school.

Shit!

I got up as quickly as I could, careful not to wake the boys, and found my way over to my shoes in the corner. I hopped around trying to get them on quickly, and put my coat on.

"Eilana? Where are you going?" Niall questioned sleepily as he sat up and stretched.

I looked at him in surprise. "It's Friday. We have to go to school today. I totally forgot what day it was last night." I answered him, grabbing my things.

He looked at the time and his eyes widened. "Shit! We're supposed to be there in like, half an hour!" He hissed.

I raised my eyebrows at him. "Yeah I know. That's why I'm leaving right now." I told him as I walked towards the door.

"Wait! I'll give you a ride. You'll never make it on time by foot." He got up quickly, slipping on his green sneakers, and grabbing his hat.

"I can't go to school looking like this." I laughed and gestured to my pajama like attire.

"Why not? I think you look cute like that." He winked and grabbed his phone, shoving it in his pocket.

I blushed and crossed my arms. "I'm serious!" I whined.

"So am I. Don't worry I'll drop you by your house." He grabbed his gray hoodie and pulled it on. He led me out to his car, opening the door for me.

He headed straight for my house, at what felt like 90mph. He was a good driver, even though I was still nervous. He took a lot of back streets and we made it to my house with 20 minutes left.

I shot out of the car and through the door, not even bothering to close it behind me. I could hear Niall's laughter as he watched me with amusement. I was in my room with the door shut before Niall even entered the house.

I quickly stripped off my clothes and slipped on some skinnies and a red and black striped top. I found my red converse hanging out from under the bed, and put those on.

I ran over to my vanity and put on some eyeliner and mascara as fast as I could. I took my hair down from the messy bun it was falling out of, and brushed through it as it fell into waves. It looked a little wonky but I didn't have time to fix it right now. I put on my black peacoat and grabbed a few things I needed and headed out into the living room where Niall was sitting.

He looked at me with a smile and a raised eyebrow. "Ready to go?"

I nodded my head and rushed for the car, getting in before he even made it outside.

"You sure are in a hurry." He laughed as he started the car.

"Well, yeah? We're going to be late. Don't you care?" I asked him, pulling down the mirror to look at myself.

"A little bit, yeah. But I don't fret about it too much. It's not like it's the first time I've been late." He shrugged.

I didn't respond. He kept looking over to me. "You look lovely, now stop worrying." He reached over and closed the mirror, making me cross my arms and sigh.

"My hair won't lay right!" I whined at him.

He looked at me and rolled his eyes. "Your hair looks fine." He reassured.

I only crossed my arms tighter and looked at him, sticking my tongue out playfully.

"Here, wear this." He pulled off his black snapback and put it on my head.

I looked at myself in the mirror again, satisfied that it covered up my bad hair.

He looked over at me, and I looked back smiling. "Thanks." I told him.

He smiled and gave a quick nod of his head. "You look adorable in it."

"Thanks." I looked down at my hands, blushing.

We made it to school only two minutes late. We both rushed to our classes, saying our byes for the next couple of hours.

I cautiously walked into class almost ten minutes late. It took forever to get anywhere in this stupid school. I was horribly nervous, being so shy like I am.

Ms. Walton turned around to look at me with an annoyed face. "How nice of you to turn up, Ms. Stockridge. She gestured towards the seats and went back to her job.

I quietly sat down, resting for the first time today. That's when it hit me. Louis. It all came back to me now. I was too distracted up until now to think about it. But now it all came back.

I bit my lip, trying not to cry. My vision blurred and I quickly looked down, bringing my hand up to my face, inconspicuously wiping the single tear that fell.

I tried to pay attention to the lesson to take my mind off of it, but Louis was all I could think about. It was tearing me up inside.

Did I do the right thing? Is he happier now? Am I? Clearly not. But maybe in time... When will I see him again? Will he talk to me? Probably not.

I sighed quietly, feeling exhausted both mentally and physically. I pulled myself together and sat up straight.

I did this for both of us. I might hate it now, but it'll be better in the long run. I've just got to let him go. Move on. He'll thank me for it later. He's just blind right now.

I was exactly right. It finally clicked. This was going to be good for us. Although I was still upset, and my heart still broken, I would get over it, right?

~

I took a deep breath as I walked into my first class with Louis. He's been absent the whole week. I was starting to worry about him. But after yesterday, I wasn't too excited to see him either.

I walked in and sat down. I scanned the room, but Louis was nowhere in sight. I breathed a sigh of relief and relaxed.

Right as the bell rang I heard the door fly open. The whole class looked to see who it was. I tensed up as I saw Louis standing in the doorway.

He looked different. He had dark circles under his eyes, and his hair was messy. Well, more messy than usual. His eyes were dull and lifeless, and he didn't seem to be all there when the teacher spoke to him.

He walked right past me, not even looking at me once, and sat down in his usual seat behind me. Even though he seemed to ignore my presence, I could feel his eyes on me. I would give anything to know his thoughts right now.

I couldn't read him at all. Was he mad? Upset? Apathetic? I couldn't tell, and it was driving me insane.

Even though I told myself I wasn't going to have anything to do with his life anymore, there was still a part of me that wanted to know if he cared even a little bit.

~

Later at lunch, Louis was nowhere to be seen. I sat at the table with Niall and Liam like usual.

"Thank you so much for waking me up this morning, guys! I was only twenty minutes late to school!" Liam said sarcastically as he sat down.

Me and Niall looked at each other and cracked up laughing.

"Sorry, Liam! It totally slipped my mind!" I apologized, still laughing.

He chuckled a bit himself and rolled his eyes.

"So, what are we going to do this weekend?" Niall asked us.

I looked at Liam and shrugged. "What do think, Liam?" I asked lazily, going back to my food.

Liam pondered the thought for a second. "What about...we could go to an amusement park?" He suggested.

I nodded my head. "I'm down. But there's only three of us." I put out there.

"Oh, yeah." Liam pouted.

I laughed and poked his cheek. "One of you guys needs to get a girlfriend or something." I joked.

Liam and Niall chuckled. "But all the girls here aren't girlfriend material." Liam stated blankly.

I made a weird face and looked around. "What do you mean? The girls here are all beautiful and perfect."

They looked at each other and laughed. When I gave them a confused look, Liam explained. "No they're not. And besides, even if they are pretty, their personalities are shit. They're only good for a..." He cut himself off when Niall and I looked at him expectantly.

He suddenly turned sheepish and looked down at his plate. "Sorry. My point is, they're far from making good girlfriends. So you're just stuck having to be the only girl in this friend circle." He nudged me softly.

I rolled my eyes at him. "I still can't believe you almost just said that." I laughed.

"I can." Niall laughed along with me.

Liam turned to us and made a puppy face. "I said I was sorry!" He whined.

"Oh, no. I'm not mad. Just shocked. I didn't know you were like that." I teased him, still laughing.

He stuck his bottom lip out more and crossed his arms. "Well, I don't think it's funny. Niall you're supposed to be on my side! Now you've gone and made me look like a man-whore to Eilana!" He reached across and punched Niall in the arm.

"You have done that yourself!" Niall retorted.

"Star Wars quote! Ohhh! Nice!" Me and Niall fist bumped, laughing.

"You guys are nerds." Liam teased.

"Yeah, okay, Batman." I fired back at him.

Niall laughed and pointed at Liam. "Oh! She got you good, man!"

Liam smiled and held up his hands. "I suppose I walked right into that one."

We all laughed at our silliness, finally getting back to our food.

I noticed Harry and Zayn across the way. I caught Harry looking at me a few times, but he looked different. Where he would usually have a big annoying smirk on his face, there was a frown instead. He looked almost emotionless. His eyes were...sad? He looked to be in deep though most the time, and he wasn't paying any attention to the words people were speaking to him. He seemed distant.

~

"Niall."

He turned around in his desk chair. "Yeah?"

"I think I'm getting a headache." I told him blandly, as I played with the pillow on his bed.

He got up and got on the bed, laying next to me. He propped himself up on his elbow and looked at me. "I'm sorry. Do you want me to get you something for it?" He asked sweetly.

"If it's not too much trouble, please." I looked over at him. His face was pouting dramatically.

"Of course not! I'll be right back." He got up and ran out of the room.

I sighed and put the pillow down, rolling over. I kept thinking about Niall. We had become unusually close in the amount of time we had been friends. But I liked it. I liked being so close to him. I always thought he was cute, but I never would have dreamed he'd be so sweet. It was making it harder on me though. I already liked him, and it was only getting stronger with every passing day.

I loved being friends with him, but the line was beginning to blur. I mean, I can't forget about the kiss at the party. But I wasn't going to bring it up. Who knows, maybe it was just the alcohol in him.

I hadn't forgot about Liam kissing me either though. Neither of us has said anything about it. Although I really just took it as a friendly gesture. Liam is pretty affectionate. I'm sure that's all it was.

I heard the door open and Niall walked in, shutting it behind him.

"Here ya go, darlin." He handed me the pain killers and a glass of water.

I sat up and took them, putting the water down on the bedside table. I turned around and smiled at him. "Thank you, Ni."

He smiled back and grabbed the remote to his giant flat screen on the wall. He turned it on and leaned back on the bed. I curled up next to him, resting my head on his chest.

"What's a good headache movie?" He asked, looking down at me.

I thought for a minute. "Alice in Wonderland!" I exclaimed, hoping he would have it.

He smiled down at me and rolled his eyes. He got up and walked over to his giant bookcase of movies. He looked through them for a second before bending down and pulling it out from the bottom shelf. He looked at me and held it up, shaking it with a goofy grin.

I laughed at him and he put it in, dimming the lights and sitting back down again. He put his arm around me. "I can't believe you're making me watch this. I haven't watched this movie since I was like, six."

I laughed and hit him on the chest lightly. "Hey! This is one of my favorite movies! If you want to be my friend, you'll learn to like it!" I joked.

Sometime during the movie I fell asleep on him. I stirred slightly when I felt him get up. I just rolled over and tried to go back to sleep. I was too out of it to even realize where I was.

After what seemed like a few minutes, I still couldn't fall back to sleep. I was drifting in and out of it, but never opening my eyes. I heard very light shuffling around. At that point I remembered where I was. I knew it was just Niall so I didn't bother to get up. I decided to pretend like I was asleep.

I'm such a child sometimes.

The shuffling noises stopped. It was quiet, but I could barely hear him breathing. He must have been close. I felt him stroke my hair suddenly. I wanted to open my eyes so bad, but I decided against it. I wanted to see what he was going to do.

I felt the bed sink as he sat down beside me. He rubbed my cheek lightly with his thumb. It took everything I had not to smile or giggle. I felt nervous. I wanted to see what was going on. I wanted to see his face.

His breathing became a tiny bit more audible and his breaths were getting deeper. And then the last thing I expected happened. I felt him kiss me. It was very light and gentle, his lips warm and inviting. I opened my eyes slowly and pulled away in shock.

He looked shocked as well. His lips parted, as if trying to speak, but nothing was coming out. I sat up, looking him in the eye.

His blue eyes were piercing as he registered what happened. "Um, sorry." He said slowly, unsure. "You just looked so pretty. I-I wanted to kiss you. I hope you're not mad." He hung his head.

I only smiled at his shy awkwardness and laughed. "I'm not mad. It's okay, Niall. It was just a kiss anyway." I smiled at him.

He looked up and smiled back. "Oh, um, is your head feeling better?"

"Yeah. It went away a while ago." I grabbed my phone from the table and looked at it. 10:48pm.

"I should probably get you home or your mom is going to kill me." He chuckled.

"Okay." I got up and put my coat and shoes back on.

~

He walked me to my door. "I'll see you tomorrow, El." We hugged for a minute. Niall gave the best hugs, and they were always really long, warm hugs. "Can I have a goodnight kiss?" He asked, winking at me.

I rolled my eyes at him. "Sure, Ni." He puckered his lips cutely, and leaned down, pecking me on the lips. He smiled brightly and opened the door for me.

"Night, El." He said as I walked in.

"Night." I watched him get in his car and drive off.

Okay, it's official. I like him. A lot.

I squealed quietly and ran to my room, shutting the door. I slid down the back of it and sighed. My heart was beating rapidly.

Does he like me back, maybe? No. There's no way. He's just being affectionate. He probably thinks of me like a little sister or something. Still, should I tell him? Maybe I'm rushing into things. My heart still hurts from Louis, but, I can't help liking Niall. I shouldn't even worry about it. Nothing is going to come from it. Right? Maybe I should just talk to Liam about it...

I got up and grabbed my phone from my pocket and called Liam. It rang twice before he picked up.

What's up, Eilana?

“Liam I have to talk to you! I've got another problem. Do you mind?”

I'll be over in five.

The line went dead and I hung up. I took off my coat and shoes, and changed into something more comfortable. I was just walking to the kitchen for a drink when I heard a knock on the door.

“Liam!" I opened the door and attacked him in a hug.

He laughed and kissed me on the cheek before stepping inside. "So what's the problem, love?"

"Sorry that it's so late." I didn't even think about that when I called him.

"Oh don't worry about it. I don't mind at all." He smiled at me.

He followed me to my room and I shut the door. He sat down on my bed, looking around curiously.

"Liam, you know I talk to you about everything, right?" I asked him as I sat down by him.

He looked at me with a grin. "Yes." He said simply.

"You're the one I come to with all my problems. I trust you because I know I can." I told him.

He looked side to side, wondering where this was going. "Yes, I'm aware. And I'm very flattered that I'm so important to you." He smiled and put his arm around me, pulling me into him.

"So, even if it was about your best friend, you wouldn't tell anyone or judge me, right?" I played nervously with one of his hoodie strings.

"Of course not. No matter who it is, I'm here to help. Now, it's about Niall, isn't it?" He questioned, looking at me.

"How did you know?"

"I just do. You like him, am I right?" He asked again.

"Liam, how do you know that?"

"I didn't. I only suspected that you did. But now I know you do." He smiled cheekily down at me.

I hit him on the arm and gave him a playful look. "You sneaky little boy."

He laughed and put his other arm around me. "Let me guess, you like him, but you feel like you're moving on from Louis too fast?" He took the words from my mouth.

My jaw dropped open. "You're good."

"Just a guess." He smiled humbly.

"Well, am I? What do you think?"

He looked away, thinking for a moment.

"Well, in my opinion, I think you should wait a little longer before setting your sights on someone else. I know you already like Niall, but just try not to take things too fast or you'll wind up hurting yourself. You're very vulnerable right now, so any kind of romantic affection will pull you in easily. You feel the need to be loved by someone because your heart is broken, and you're trying to fix it too quickly. These things take time." He hugged me tighter and I nestled my head into his neck.

I nodded my head slowly.

"Now, I can't tell you what to do. That's just my opinion on it. No one but you knows for sure if you're ready to move on or not. I can only give you advice, I can't tell you how you feel. Ultimately, it comes down to you."

"You're right. Thank you Liam." I smiled to myself, feeling better, and closed my eyes.

"Can I ask you something personal?" He asked suddenly.

"Of course! I'm always asking you things, so shoot."

He hesitated a little bit. "How are you feeling about the whole Louis thing?" He asked quietly, as if somehow that would make it easier on me.

"I'm not over him completely. It still hurts to think about him. I still love him, as a friend, you know? I don't know if I'll ever be over him entirely. But I know I did the right thing." I told him honestly.

"I'm sorry." He wiped away the tear that I didn't even notice had fallen.

"I did the right thing, right Liam?" My voice cracked.

Why did I always have to second guess my self about everything?

I started crying all over again. I thought that I was past this stage. I thought I was stronger than this.

I thought a lot of things, but none of them seemed to be right...

Chapter Text

Harry's P.O.V

"Get out of bed you useless shit! If you're late to school one more time I'm going to beat you into next week!" I heard the booming voice of my father as he kicked in my bedroom door.

I rolled over to see him standing in my doorway, clearly hungover. I could tell by his face he wasn't about to take any shit from me.

"Didn't you hear me you son of a bitch?! Get the hell up!" He kept on.

"Alright! I'm up! Get off my ass about it!" I yelled back.

He left with a sarcastic laugh. I groaned lowly and rubbed my eyes. I looked around for a second before getting up and making my way to my bathroom. After showering, I dried off and dropped the towel, doing my hair lazily. I walked into my walk-in closet and I picked out some green skinnies, and my Ramones T. I grabbed my classic converse and sat down on the chair behind me in the closet to put them on. I grabbed my black peacoat and shrugged it on as I walked downstairs.

I headed straight for the kitchen. As I entered, I smiled at the familiar face.

"Morning, Clara." I greeted her as I sat down on the barstool.

"Good morning, Harry!" She beamed back at me.

Clara is our chef. She's been cooking for our family since I can remember. She's a very jolly, middle aged woman with dark brown hair and twinkling brown eyes. She absolutely loves me. She's been more like a mother to me than my own mother has been. I could talk to her about anything.

"What did you make for me today?" I asked curiously.

"Your favorite. Chocolate chip pancakes with whipped cream." She placed it in front of me and added the whipped cream. They were still warm, and the chocolate was still gooey. Just how I liked it.

I smiled and thanked her as she went back to her cooking.

I had only taken a few bites when my father stomped into the room, yelling into his phone. He snapped it shut suddenly and set his eyes on me.

"What the hell are you still doing here you little fucker?! You're supposed to be walking into school right now!" He barked at me. "Clara, what did I tell you?! Don't serve him breakfast if he comes down after 7:00!" He continued to yell at Clara.

I rolled my eyes and gave Clara an apologetic look before grabbing my things and slipping out of the door. The valet had already pulled up in my all black Lamborghini Aventador. I got in and headed to school in a sour mood like usual.

~

"I can't believe they're hanging out with Eilana all the time now. I mean, what about us? They can't just abandon us. Then again, she's more pleasing to look at than us. I don't blame them for wanting to look at that all day." Zayn ranted on. I wasn't really listening as I rummaged through my locker.

"They haven't abandoned us, Zayn. They just got tired of us being assholes all the time, so now they're taking breaks from us. Honestly, I wouldn't want to hang around me and you either. We've really become dicks in the past year or so. I would get tired of it too." I told him, not seeming to care on the outside. But really, it worried me.

What if they really are going to abandon us? Abandon me? I'll have no one then. And the last thing I want to do is lose another friend. I would rather not repeat what happened in freshman year.

We walked to lunch, sitting at our usual table. No one else dared to sit here. They knew this was my table. Funny how I had power over all of these people. They're no different from myself, yet they do everything I say. All because I wave my father's name in their faces. If only they knew my father doesn't give a shit about me...

Liam's words kept playing over in my head since I heard them. Take a step back and look at myself. People have told me that a million times over, but of course I just thought they were being over sensitive. But never have I had a friend say it. And it wasn't until that moment that it clicked.

He's right. Just because my life is hell, doesn't mean I get to make other people suffer. And what am I thinking? I know what it's like to be a victim, why would I victimize innocent people? It's not like me. Sure I've always picked fun at people, but only in a joking manner. It wasn't until recently that I started being so bad. I used to be the guy everyone liked and respected, but now I'm just the guy everyone likes and fears.

As a matter of fact, this all started around the time Eilana showed up. I remember when I first laid eyes on her. I knew there was something special about her. I had to get her attention. I'd never wanted attention from a girl so badly before. After watching her for a few weeks, I decided to make my move.

But when I approached her, she didn't seem to want anything to do with me. Apparently, news of my playboy reputation had already reached her. Sure I was a playboy, and everyone knew it, but that had never stopped me from getting a girl before. But this girl was different. She didn't bow at my feet, or blush when I called her babe. And the second she rejected me, I was immediately intrigued.

That was a first for me. I was confused. I reacted the wrong way, like any dumbass like me would, and got angry. I'll never forget the smirk she had as she walked away from me. Regardless of the fact that she had pissed me off not five seconds ago, in that moment as I watched her walk away, I was excited. I had never had a girl treat me like that before. It was a challenge of my abilities, and I was more than willing to prove that I could get any girl.

But as the weeks progressed, it proved harder than I thought. She ignored me completely. And the more she denied me her attention, the more I craved it. I was just nice and flirty at first, but after a while I got desperate for her to notice me at all. That's when I realized that teasing her got her to respond to me. I started using that method to get her to talk to me, but obviously I took it too far.

It wasn't until I was sure that she hated me, that I realized I really liked her. I had fallen for her hard. Here I was, just playing some game, when I managed to screw up my chance of getting the only girl I've ever really liked. If I'm not mistaken, I would say I loved her. I was completely obsessed. And I found myself only ever thinking about her. I was constantly worried about her, yet I treated her like this. Ironic I know.

But how was I ever supposed to turn this around? She absolutely hates me. How am I supposed to approach her and then keep my calm when she blows up on me? I'm not exactly known for my good temper. Even if I did get her to forgive me, that would probably be the end of our interaction.

But it's not like I can just waltz up to her and tell her that I'm sorry for everything and I take back everything I said to her. Or maybe I can... Ugh. I don't know. Why do I have to fuck everything up for myself?

And now I feel horrible about what I've done. I had no idea she would be so upset over Louis. I didn't mean for it to end up this way. She even thinks that we're friends now. All I did was talk to him a few times. I just told him some things in the hopes of distancing them, not tearing them apart completely. I only wanted a better chance at getting close to her, and I couldn't do that while her and Louis were so close.

Maybe I should tell her... Well, at least that Louis and I aren't friends. That would probably ease her mind a little. I just hate to see her like this.

"Harry Styles! You're not even listening to me, are you?" Zayn interrupted my thoughts.

"Huh? Oh, no. Sorry, man. My mind is just running rampant lately." I explained, stabbing at my food. I hadn't taken more than three bites of it. I wasn't in the mood to eat.

He rolled his eyes and laughed at me. "Yeah, I've noticed."

~

I rolled my eyes when I saw that Liam wasn't even home yet. Here I was, waiting in his house for him. He told me to come over but he's taking his time getting here. We were finally going to hang out today. First time in a few weeks that I was seeing them outside of school. And despite how I've treated them lately, I missed my best friends.

I was sitting on the stairs when I heard the front door start to open. I stood up quickly and made my way down stairs. "It's about time you-" I stopped when I saw who walked through the door.

"What are you doing here?" Eilana questioned, eyes wide at the sight of me.

I immediately put my hands up in defense. "I mean you no harm. I'm just waiting on Liam to get back home." I told her cautiously.

She knitted her brows together. "You mean he's not even here?"

I shoved my hands in my pockets, shaking my head in answer.

"Well then why are you here, if he's not even home?" She quizzed.

"He invited me over. Did he invite you over?"

She shook her head no slowly. "I just needed to talk to him about something." She said slowly and cautiously. Her eyes never left me once, watching me carefully.

I shook my head in understanding, looking around at an attempt to dispel the awkwardness in the room.

"I'll just come back later, since you were actually invited.'' She said quietly. If it wasn't for the echo in this house, I wouldn't have understood her.

She turned to the door, reaching for the doorknob. It all seemed to happen in slow motion as my thoughts ran through my mind at a hundred miles per hour.

"Uh, wait!" I called out.

She stopped and turned around, looking at me funny. "Yes?"

I rubbed the back of my forearm, suddenly nervous. Another first for me. "Um, I just thought you should know, that, Louis and I, we're not friends." I finally spit out.

She looked at me doubtfully. "Really? Then why were you with him at the party? Why were you talking to him and helping him then?"

"Look, I know you don't want to believe anything I say, but it's true. It's a really long story. I just talked to him a few times, okay? So don't go being mad at him for being friends with me, when he's not." I told her.

She was silent for a while before she slowly nodded her head in belief. "But why are you telling me this?"

"I just-I'm-I thought you should know." I finally got out.

"Well, thanks, I guess. Or whatever..." She looked very confused as she gave me a small wave. She turned around and left after that.

As soon as the door shut, I sighed loudly and put my face in my hands.

It's a step in the right direction, Harry. It's a small step, but it's still getting somewhere. If this is going to work, I'm going to have to get used to being nice to her. This can still work, Harry. You love her. You'll make it work somehow...

Chapter Text

Louis' P.O.V

I rolled over and smacked my alarm clock. I rubbed my eyes and let my arms fall to either side of me. I sighed loudly, staring at the ceiling.

I turned my head to look beside me. Empty. I hated waking up alone. I was so used to seeing the most beautiful face every morning, with a smile on my face, and a smile on hers. Now every morning that I wake up, it's just torture. I still wasn't used to being without her, even after a week, and I don't think I'll ever get used to it.

I just lay there, feeling empty. I know I'm going to be late for school, but I don't care. It's the last thing on my mind right now. I haven't even been going since the party anyway. I told mum I'd go today though. I've been telling her I was sick this whole time. I hated lying to her, but it wasn't a complete lie. I was sick. I'm still sick. I guess I really looked ill, because my mum didn't even question it.

I did feel physically ill though. My whole body ached, my head hurt constantly, I was drained of any energy, and I could swear that my heart beat was slow.

I dragged myself out of bed and into my bathroom, I looked at myself in the mirror. Who I saw staring back at me, was a stranger. I didn't know him. He was drained of all color, his eyes were glazed over, his lips chapped, dark bags under his eyes, and he looked weak and unstable.

I sucked in a big breath and let it out.

What have you done, you fucking idiot?

Once I was done in the bathroom, I went to my walk-in closet and grabbed my black skinnies and a white T. I stuffed my feet into my black vans, and put my gray knit beanie on my head lazily, not bothering to brush my hair, and headed downstairs.

I walked into the kitchen were mum was cooking breakfast, and grabbed my bag from right where I left it a week ago.

"Morning, sweetie. Feeling any better?" She asked sweetly, scanning over me like mothers do.

I didn't even attempt a fake smile, and slung my bag over my shoulder, giving her a kiss on the cheek. "Nope. But I'm going to school anyway."

She gave me a look of worry. "You don't have to go, honey." She offered.

"I have to go back sometime." I said as I walked to the door of the kitchen.

"Aren't you going to eat something? You haven't eaten once this whole week! I'm worried about you!" She called after me.

I just shook my head. "Not hungry." I didn't even look back at her as I passed into the foyer. I walked straight to the door.

"At least put on a jacket! Louis, it's below freezing out there!" She chased after me. But I just shrugged and walked right past my jacket, going outside in just a T shirt and jeans.

I really don't care at this point. I feel numb anyway.

I decided I would walk to school today. I don't remember the last time I walked to school. But I wanted time to go as slow as possible. I was getting a lot of looks from people, and a lot of people asking me "if I was alright", or "wasn't I cold", but I just ignored them and kept walking. Slowly walking. Honestly the weather didn't even affect me one bit. I hardly noticed it at all.

Once I got to school, I realized I was already ten minutes late. I didn't try to hurry up or anything though. It really didn't matter to me anymore. The only reason I came back at all is to make mum happy.

I dragged through all morning. All of my "friends" asked me if I was okay, or told me that I didn't look so good. I just shrugged them off, leaving them with puzzled looks on their faces.

Finally it came time to go to my first class with Eilana. I was shaking with nerves at the thought of seeing her again.

What will she say? Will she say anything at all? Probably not. She fucking hates my guts now.

My stomach started to turn at the thought of her hating me, and I felt sick. My mind started running wild with thoughts of her, and how she felt about me now. I became disoriented and all the talking in the halls was driving me crazy. I didn't even notice that I was shoving through people as my pace sped up and I found myself running through the halls. I came to a halt as I approached the door, slamming it open.

Everyone turned to look at me, including Eilana. I just stood there for a second, breathing heavily. I made my way to my desk slowly. I passed right by Eilana without looking at her once. I couldn't look her in the face. Not right now. I think I would be sick. I sat down and everyone stopped staring holes into me finally.

I couldn't help but stare at Eilana. She was sitting right in front of me, literally. How could I not? I could tell just by the back of her head she looked beautiful today. She was even more beautiful than I remembered. Her waves fell perfectly down her back, and her shirt hugged her just tightly enough that I could see just how tiny and cute she was. I missed wrapping my arms around her, and telling her I loved her. Even though she had no idea what I meant when I said I loved her. She had no clue.

~

When lunch rolled around, I still didn't have an appetite. I decided I would go sit under the big oak tree outside.

I felt the chill of the wind inside and out. I was used to the harsh bite of the cold. It seemed as though I could never get warm anymore.

Why?

I kept asking myself. I threw my head back and it hit the tree. I brought my hands up to my face, covering it. I sighed heavily.

I can't believe this. I'm supposed to be in there with her right now, making her laugh and smile. Why did this have to happen? All I want is to have her back.

I know I have all of these so called friends, but none of them mean anything to me. Not compared to her. She was my world, and now she doesn't want anything to do with me. I can't bare this anymore. I never realized until now, that I've never really known what it felt like to miss someone. It's horrible.

I miss the way she always called me a dork for making lame jokes, but laughed at them anyway. Or the way she always smiled when she caught me looking at her. When she would sing really loudly and out of tune over the music in my car, not caring because she knew I thought it was cute. And how she would snuggle up to me because she was always cold. And we would always watch Disney movies and act like little kids afterwards.

But most of all, I missed her scent, and her touch. I missed her eyes and how they sparkled with curiosity when I looked at her for too long. I missed her lips and the way she kissed me. Or how she would blush when I told her she was beautiful, even though I told her every day.

And now, I feel like I didn't tell her enough. I was too much of a coward to tell her how much I really loved her. How much she meant to me. I was scared she didn't love me back as much as I loved her. But I was okay with it. At least I still had her. I could still love her, even if she didn't know. But now, I didn't even have that. And I was falling to pieces. Every day, I'm falling apart more, until one day, there won't be anything left to fall.

I know most guys would have moved on already, only losing a friend like this. But I'm not most guys, and she's not an ordinary friend. I love her, and I'm never going to move on. I can't even live my life anymore. I can't eat, I can't sleep, I can't concentrate. I don't do anything anymore. I've laid in my bed and thought about her for the last six days.

It's driving me insane. And there is nothing I can do about it. I've thought about crawling back to her and begging her to come back, but she doesn't want me in her life anymore, and I'm going to respect her wishes. I owe her that much. And besides, the last time I didn't respect her wishes, our friendship fell apart. The last thing I wanted to do was make it worse between us. If that was even possible.

I can't believe I let jealousy get in the way of our friendship. But when she started hanging out with other guys, my mind was clouded with hatred towards them. The thought of another guy touching her made me burn with anger. She was mine. It was always that way, and it always would be. Or so I thought. I had no idea that these other guys could mean so much to her.

It only twisted the knife in further to know that she cared for these guys over me. I never saw the day coming when she would care so much about anyone else. But I guess it was bound to happen. To know that there were other people in her life to protect her or be there for her. It meant I wasn't the one she would always come running to anymore, and it killed me to know that. That was my job, and I loved it. I loved knowing that I was the only one who could make her feel better, or cheer her up. She needed me.

And somehow it turned out that in the end she needed them, because I was the one that caused her pain. I loved her so much, that it was the downfall of me. But how was I supposed to know that you could love someone too much? No one ever warned me about that. No one ever told me that, sometimes when you loved someone, they didn't love you back.

I wiped the tear that began to fall. I pulled my legs closer to me, hugging them as I lay my head on my knee.

Now I see that she was right. I was blinded by anger. I didn't realize that I was hurting her. All I was trying to do was protect her, but I never asked her if she needed protection. She's a smart girl, and she can make her own judgments. I know that. I was just too scared to let her. And now, she's left me.

But she seems happy, and knowing that is enough to keep me away. I need to stay out of her life if she's ever going to be truly happy again. And that's what I'll do.

I always promised her that I would be there for her, and that I would do everything I could to make her happy. And I intend to keep my promises, even if it kills me.

~

I threw my bag down in the kitchen and grabbed a bottle of water from the refrigerator.

"How was school? I hope you didn't feel too bad today." Mum asked as she dried the pan she just washed.

I looked her way and took a big breath. "It was fine." I lied as I made my way to my room.

I dropped onto my bed, not bothering to get comfortable, and just lay there for a few minutes. I rolled over and sat up, chugging what was left in the bottle, and throwing it to the floor.

My room was an absolute mess. It was always clean before. Not anymore. My whole life was a mess now. I didn't know what to do with myself. I can't even believe I showered today. That's the most I've done all week.

I felt my phone vibrate. I grabbed it from my pocket and looked at it. I immediately knitted my brows together in confusion. I recognized that number.

Blocked

I told her that we aren't friends or anything, just that I talked to you a few times. I just thought it was the right thing to do.

What the hell was Harry telling me for?

Is he trying to be a better person now or something? Why would he do that for me? Weird.

I can't believe he still remembers my phone number. He hasn't texted or called me since freshman year, when we stopped talking.

It wasn't my fault that the popularity got to his head. He started doing a bunch of bad things and being an ass to people. He started making friends with the wrong people and eventually, when I told him that I thought he was changing, he told me he didn't need me anymore and we stopped being friends.

But it wasn't until he took an interest in Eilana that we started being bitter towards each other. It absolutely infuriated him that I was so close to Eilana, and that I got to her first. So why was he trying to make me seem less horrible to her?

Harry was always unpredictable though. Even when we were little kids, I never knew what he was going to do next. But I guess that's why I liked being friends with him so much.

I looked at my phone again. There was a picture of Eilana and me that she took when I was sleeping as my wallpaper. I was cuddled up next to her and she was kissing me on the cheek. I sighed at the image, spiraling into deeper depression.

I missed us. I missed her. I guess I better get used to it though. She's not coming back to me and it's my fault.

I always thought that it hurt before, loving her and her not loving me back the same way. But now it hurts more than I could have imagined. Because I'm in love with her still, and she doesn't love me at all...

Chapter Text

Niall's P.O.V

"Well, yeah, it would be a hard choice. But if I had to pick between being a Jedi or a superhero, I would go with superhero. Because they always get the girls." I said, smiling cheekily at Eilana.

She laughed and rolled her eyes, nudging me playfully as we walked. "Is that all you think about, Ni? Girls?"

We were walking down the sidewalk after a day of window shopping. After Eilana begged me to go shopping with her, I finally gave into those sparkling eyes of hers. How could I say no to her? So, somehow, as lazy as I am, here we are, walking down the sidewalk now.

I smiled at her question. "No." I replied, smiling down at her. "Just one girl." I said under my breath, turning my head.

"What?" She looked at me with question.

"Nothing." I smirked at her, lacing my fingers through hers.

She looked up at me. I grinned at her, admiring her cute, innocent face. She looked down, a hint of pink on her cheeks. I couldn't help but smile happily at her reaction to my touch. I loved the fact that I could make her blush. She looked so beautiful when she blushed. I could stare at her forever.

"So, are you going to go watch the fireworks on Bonfire Night?" I asked her. It was only three days from now.

"Maybe. Are you?"

"Well, I was planning on going with you, actually. But I mean, if you already have someone to go with, that's cool. I'll just go with Liam or something." I told her, feeling slightly nervous now.

She laughed at my rambling on. "And who would I go with if not you, Ni? Of course I'll go with you! Honestly I thought you would want to go with a girl you liked or something though. That's why I didn't ask." She told me, shrugging her shoulders.

I wanted to tell her that's exactly what I was doing. But I can't. Not yet. It's too soon.

"No way! I'd rather go with my awesome best friend!" I corrected her with a smile and put my arm around her.

"Thanks, Ni. I just wish I could say that you're awesome too." She teased with a smirk on her face.

I looked at her with my jaw hanging open. "You know I'm awesome! Come on!" I threw my arms up dramatically.

"Not even in your dreams, Horan!" She continued to giggle at me.

I faked an angry face and turned it into an evil smirk. I put my hands up and wiggled my fingers at her creepily. "You're going to regret that!"

She shrieked in surprise and started running away down the sidewalk as I chased after her. She ran as fast as she could, but her legs were no match for my longer ones. I quickly caught up with her. "Gotcha!" I wrapped my arms around her and lifted her up, spinning her around. She giggled and squirmed in my grip. I put her back down, but kept my hold on her.

"If you take back what you said, I'll spare ya." I raised my eyebrow, waiting for her answer.

She narrowed her eyes at me and poked out her bottom lip. "No!" She replied in a childish voice.

"Are you sure?" I gave her another chance, smirking at her.

She nodded her head and smiled proudly. I shrugged my shoulders and started tickling her. She immediately burst out in laughter. She was squirming and pushing but she wasn't strong enough to get out of the hold I had on her.

Man, she's really ticklish! No wonder she hates it so much.

I smiled to myself triumphantly when I finally stopped. "More?" I asked her.

"No! No more, Ni! Please!" She begged, putting her hands up as though somehow that would protect her.

"You take it back?" I leaned into her, smirking evilly.

She was still trying to catch her breath as she looked at me with pleading eyes. When she didn't answer after a few seconds, I started to tickle her again.

"I take it back! I take it back! Please! Stop! I love you Niall! You are the most awesome person I know!" She shrilled quickly.

When I stopped, she kept giggling cutely. That's when I realized how close we were, and the nervous feeling in my stomach appeared again. She stared at me, but she seemed to be lost in thought. By the time I realized that I was leaning in, it was too late to stop. I went to kiss her, but she turned her head slightly at the last minute, resulting in me kissing her on the cheek.

I pulled back and sighed so quietly I doubt she even heard it. She looked up at me from under her eyelashes, looking almost sorry. I smiled at her to let her know I wasn't upset.

I turned around and bent down slightly, waiting for her to get on my back. "Come on, I'm about to die of thirst. Let's get back to the house."

She hopped onto my back and I started to walk towards my house. We weren't far from it already.

"Is Liam coming too?" She asked me out of the blue.

I raised my eyebrows even though she couldn't see it. "Coming where?" I asked her, confused.

"To watch the fireworks. I thought maybe if he wasn't going with some hot chick, he could come with us." She explained.

Great. I really wanted it to be just the two of us...

"Uh, yeah sure." I agreed anyway.

So much for that plan, Niall. Great going on that one.

~

"Aww! That's not fair, Ni!" She whined and crossed her arms.

"Yes it is! It's not my fault you suck at blocking!" I laughed as I teased her about her gaming skills.

We've been in my room playing video games for the last hour and a half. Unfortunately for her, I've been winning most of the time.

"You should let me win! I'm a girl!" She exclaimed in a childish voice, poking her lip out.

"Okay. I will then." I told her, completely serious.

"No! If I'm going to win, I want to do it because I'm good at the game! Don't you dare let me win!"

I scrunched my face in confusion. "Well which one is it? Do you want me to let you win or not?" I asked her, laughing.

"No! Don't let me win! I hate it when people do that!"

I shook my head and laughed at her confusing ways. "Okay then. I guess you're just going to keep losing." I teased, smirking at her.

She looked at me with her mouth hanging open. "Youuuu!" She yelled in aggravation. "You annoying Irishman!" She giggled as she tackled me, pushing me over on the floor.

"You love me! Don't lie, El!"

She opened her mouth, about to say something, but she just stopped and closed her mouth. "You're right. I do. But to be fair, who couldn't love little Ni?" She smiled and hugged me.

"Little? I am not little." I corrected her, puffing out my chest.

She laughed at me and gave me a weird look. "Okay, so you're not little. But you are adorable!"

"I am not! I'm a big, strong, sexy man!" I argued. I was only joking though, of course.

She just laughed harder. "Oh, are you? I didn't notice." She teased again.

Ouch.

"Ow!" I placed my hand over my heart, faking a pained face. "That's rough, El."

She made a pouty face and hugged me in apology. "I still love you, though." She beamed up at me.

Her words made me smile. Even if she didn't mean them the way I would have liked, they still meant the world to me.

"I love you too, Eilana." I smiled warmly at her.

"We should watch a movie!" She jumped up and ran over to my movie collection.

I rolled my eyes with a smile on my face. "Whatever you want." I stood behind her as she browsed over them. She pulled one out finally, and gave it to me. I held it up and looked at it.

"Dumbo?" I raised my brow at her.

"Hey, it's your movie." She said simply and got on the bed.

I turned off the lights and put the movie in. I crawled in next to her and she snuggled up to me.

After a little while I looked down to see that she had fallen asleep again. I chuckled lightly and turned the movie off. I just laid there, thinking to myself.

Here I am, snuggled up to my best friend, who I also happen to like, but she has no idea. And I can't tell her because her heart is still broken over some other guy. I'm trying my hardest to be patient, but it's hard. When all you want to do is hug them and kiss them every other second of the day, and you can't, it's hard. Especially when the person you like is this special and this beautiful.

I know she knows that I'm here for her. Whatever she needs, whatever it may be, she knows I'm here, and I always will be. I just hope that she also knows I'm trying my hardest to mend her broken heart. Whatever the cost.

I want to be the one she thinks about all the time, and not Louis. I would never cause her so much pain. All I want, is for her to be happy. With me. I want to be all she needs. I want to be the one. The right one. But I know that she's vulnerable right now, and I'm not going to take advantage of that. I want it to happen because she really loves me. And for that to happen, I'll have to wait. It will be a while. But I'll wait. Because she's worth it. I would wait a hundred years if it meant that she would love me.

I always thought she was gorgeous the moment I set eyes on her. But now that I know her, she's so much more than a pretty face. She's the most amazing girl I've ever met. She makes me nervous. She makes me shy, and she makes me come out of my shell, all at the same time. I can be myself around her. She's not like other girls, where they expect me to be a certain way, or say certain things. She likes the way I am. I can't explain the feeling she gives me. And when we touch, it makes my stomach flip. I never stop thinking about her.

She makes me feel, like no other girl has ever been able to make me feel before. I can't explain it. I just, know she's special. I can feel it.

I think...I think I'm in love.

Chapter Text

I sat down at the table and greeted Liam who was already munching on his food.

"Where's the third musketeer?" He asked as I opened my soda can.

"Running a bit late. Had to talk to Mr. Broft after class about something." I told him, shrugging my shoulders.

He nodded in response and took another bite of his food. "So what are your plans today?"

I chuckled before responding. "What do I always do, Liam?" I gave him a sarcastic look.

He looked side to side, thinking about it. "Hang out with me and Niall." He said simply.

"And my plans have not changed. What else would I do, anyway?" I scrunched up my face, shoveling the food around on my plate.

"I don't know. I thought maybe you had a date or something..." He trailed off.

I laughed loudly at his assumption. "With who? You don't think things through all the way, do you?"

"Well, Niall of course." He said, his gaze never leaving his plate.

My eyes widened at the name and I nearly choked on my soda. "Liam, you can't be serious!" I looked at him like he was crazy.

He looked up innocently. "Well, you guys are practically dating anyway. I just thought, maybe he had finally made it official." He shrugged like it was all no big deal.

"We are not! We're just a little flirty sometimes..." I shot back defensively.

He cocked an eyebrow up at me. "A little? I would hate to see your idea of a lot."

I rolled my eyes at him and laughed. "Look, we are not dating. I know you know I like him and all, but he doesn't even like me back. I don't know where you get the idea that we're dating."

"Uh, I watch you two. I don't know if you've noticed or not but, I'm kind of around you guys all the time. And if you two aren't a snog session away from being a couple, then I don't know what a couple is anymore. Honestly, I'm starting to feel like a third wheel lately." He confessed blankly.

"Oh Liam, you're reading too much into things! Like I said, Niall doesn't even like me back." I stressed to him.

"Are you sure about that?" He quizzed, looking at me with a knowing face.

I only stared at him for a few seconds before I felt an arm around me. "Hey babe." Niall greeted as he kissed me on the cheek before sitting down. "Hey bro." He nodded at Liam.

Liam shot me a look from across the table, but I decided to ignore it.

"So, what have you two been talking about." He asked as he started digging into his food.

Liam and I looked at each other knowingly. "Uh, not much really. Just the usual nerd talk." I piped up before Liam could. His eyebrow shot up at me again. I gave him a look back telling him to keep his mouth shut.

Niall gave us both weird looks. "Um, okay. Well, I can't hang out after school today. I've got family stuff I have to tend to. Mum won't let me off the hook this time." He explained, looking at me carefully.

"Oh no! What ever will I do without you!" I feigned worry, putting my hand to my forehead.

Niall smirked at my act and threw his arm around me. "You know you'll miss me. Don't even play." He pulled my face towards him, kissing me on the corner of my mouth.

I pretended to be disgusted and pushed him away playfully. "That's what you think." I teased.

"Sorry, but I guess you'll just have to be stuck with Liam today." He smirked at Liam, letting him know he was joking.

Liam rolled his eyes. "Oh, hah hah. You won't be missed." He spat back teasingly.

I turned my attention towards the rest of the room. I noticed Harry kept looking at me again. But he always seemed lost in thought. It's as if he was looking right through me or something. It creeped me out. Ever since our weird encounter at Liam's house last week, he's been like this. He hasn't picked on me once. He hasn't even approached me. He was definitely up to something.

Louis was still nowhere to be found at lunch, as usual. I couldn't help but worry a little bit. I knew he was okay. I saw him in classes and passed him in the halls all the time. But, he has been looking thinner, and the dark circles under his eyes seem to get darker with the passing days. I tried to convince myself that I was not the cause of his appearance, but it wasn't working very well.

I'd still say that things between us are finally getting better though. When we see each other now, we usually wave to the other. And sometimes we even say hi. That's it though. Nothing more. I found that it made me smile when I greeted him, but it was followed with a feeling of deep sadness. I felt…unsatisfied. I was used to running right to him, not walking right past him.

The days seemed to pass slowly, yet too quickly at the same time. I was already so comfortable with this new life of Niall and Liam all the time. It must be a sign that I'm ready to move on.

~

"So are you coming with us?" I asked Liam, sitting down on the couch in his room.

Liam looked over at me with curiosity. "Where? And I'm assuming you mean Niall and yourself?"

"To watch fireworks on Bonfire Night! And yes, Niall and myself." I said, tracing patterns on the fabric of the couch.

"Don't you guys want to go to that alone?" He asked.

I laughed and shook my head. "No, Li. It's not like that. Come on! It'll be more fun if you're there!" I begged, pulling my best puppy face.

He took one look at me and laughed. "Alright, alright! I'd be happy to come."

"Yay!" I stood up and cheered, hugging him happily.

"I still think I'll feel like an awkward third wheel though." He joked.

I laughed and sat down on his bed. "I promise to include you in everything so you don't feel left out, okay?"

He laughed and brushed it off, not seeming to care too much. "Do you really like him, El?" He took a more serious tone, sitting down next to me.

I thought for a second. "Yeah. I do. And I think I've only just realized that. He's just so, I don't know! I can't explain it, Li. I just feel like we're perfect for each other, you know?" I looked at him, a great big smile on my face.

He looks a little...upset?

"Yeah. If you think so.. That's great." He replied quietly, looking down at his hands.

"I just think we mesh so well! And I can go to him about anything! He's so perfectly sweet, and he understands my weirdness. He makes me feel beautiful, and he's always there for me. I can really be myself around him. I can't imagine a more perfect guy to be with." I tried my best to explain my feelings to Liam, but words just couldn't describe how I felt about Niall.

Liam stayed quiet, just listening as I rambled on.

"I mean, I think I really love him, Liam." I sighed and rested my head on his shoulder.

"That's great, El. It's good to hear that you finally sorted out your feelings. I'm really happy for you." He smiled and hugged me to him. "Are you happy, Eilana?"

I didn't even have to think about it. "I am. I really am, Liam. Thank you. I have you and Niall to thank for that. I really love you guys." I hugged him back and smiled up at him.

"It's me who should be thanking you. You saved me, Eilana. If it wasn't for you, I would still be a bad person doing bad things. I wasn't happy living like that. But you saved me from that. And Niall too. So, thank you." He kissed me on the cheek and smiled at me. "You're amazing, Eilana. You know that?"

~

"Oh come on, El. You look beautiful. Don't worry about it." Niall whined as he watched me get ready.

"Red Toms? Or white Toms?" I asked him. I had one on each foot, looking back and forth in the mirror.

He smiled and rolled his eyes. "White." He commented.

I frowned slightly at his words. "Really? I kind of like the red better." I bit my lip in thought.

"Oh my- Just come on! You look wonderful! How many times do I have to say it before you hear me?" Niall picked me up and walked out to his car.

"Niall! I have two different colored shoes on!" I squealed to him.

He laughed at my panic. "Yeah, I know. I think it looks cute. Just wear them both. That way you don't have to choose, and it makes this go a lot faster for me. Problem solved! Damn I'm good." He smiled cheekily as he put me down in the passenger seat and got in.

Tonight was Bonfire Night. I was excited to spend it with Niall and Liam. Speaking of Liam...

"Where is Liam?" I asked.

"He's meeting us there. He had something to do earlier. That's why he hasn't been with us all day. But he's on his way now."

I nodded my head and turned the music up. The Cave by Mumford and Sons was playing. Niall started singing along to it. His voice was amazing.

"Niall, have you ever thought about singing?" I asked him suddenly.

He shot me a look and chuckled. "No way. I suck at singing. My voice is shit." He laughed at himself.

"Are you serious? Your voice is amazing, Ni!"

He just kept laughing.

"I'm serious! You could be a singer." I told him.

He shook his head, smiling. "Nah. I don't think it's for me." He kept his gaze focused on the road.

After a few more minutes of driving, the car finally came to a stop. Niall opened my door for me as usual, and we met up with Liam who was already here.

I looked around me. There was people and food in every direction. I spotted a stand with hot cocoa, and being as frozen as I already was, I wanted one.

I tugged on Niall's jacket and looked up at him like an innocent five year old. "Niall, I want cocoa."

He looked down at me with a smile. "Cold?" He asked.

I nodded my head and rubbed my arms.

"I'll be right back. Stay with Liam." He told me before he walked off.

I rolled my eyes at him.

Stay with Liam? I'm not a kid.

I looked over to Liam and he smiled at me, walking closer. He put his arms around me in an attempt to get me to stop shivering.

"Thanks, Li. It's fucking freezing out here!" I chattered. I know it was the fifth of November and all, but it was cold even for that.

Liam laughed at me. "It's because you're so tiny." He teased.

I giggled and hit him on the shoulder. "I am not! You're just freakishly big!" I retorted.

Niall appeared again, this time with hot cocoa. His smile dropped upon seeing me and Liam. He stopped only for a second before continuing to hand me my warm beverage.

"Thank you, Niall." I gave him a small hug in appreciation. I downed about half of it before realizing it wouldn't warm me up. I couldn't feel my toes.

"Still cold?" Niall asked, taking off his jacket.

"Niall, I can't wear that. You'll freeze to death!" I panicked quickly.

He laughed lightly and put it around me, wrapping his arms around me as well.

"Not if I have you to snuggle up with." He whispered in my ear.

I grinned like an idiot and relaxed into him. I stared out at the navy blue sky, sparkling brightly with the stars. It was beautiful out here. It was just nice. All the people chattering softly around us, the smell of cocoa and the sound of children playing, the cold air and the warmth of Niall. It was perfect. That's when I remembered Liam was here too.

"So Liam, what were you doing all day?" I asked him, noticing he was being unusually quiet.

"I had to help my sister move the last few things to her new place." He answered, looking at me and Niall with an unreadable expression.

"Oh." I mouthed at him, shaking my head. I forgot his sister was moving out.

He and Niall were talking about something that didn't interest me, while I waited for the fireworks.

Suddenly, I saw it. The first firework shooting into the sky. I started shaking in excitement and the stupidest grin appeared on my face. I love fireworks. I was a child when it came to things like this.

It exploded in a shower of red, blue, and white, and it turned into gold glittering specks as it fell. And then another one. And another one. They kept coming until the whole sky was illuminated with them. It was beautiful. I turned and looked at Niall. He was watching too, and I could see the reflection of the fireworks in his eyes.

He looked down at me with a smile on his face. I stared back at him, mesmerized by his gaze. We stared at each other for what seemed like hours before his lips met mine. He kissed me so gently, but there was something in his kiss. I could feel the emotion behind it. This wasn't just some kiss. He had to feel something for me. This was different from before. This was perfect. In those few seconds, everything felt perfect.

We pulled away smiling at each other. We didn't say a word. We didn't need to. He hugged me closer and we watched the rest of the fireworks show in silence.

~

We pulled up to my house and Niall walked me to the door like the gentleman he is.

I fished my keys out of my pocket. "Thanks for taking me tonight, Ni. It was awesome." I smiled up at him. I had honestly had a perfect night.

"Anytime, love. I wouldn't want to spend it with anyone else." He smiled back.

"So...what..are we? I mean, what's going on with us exactly?" I asked him nervously. I was just confused now and I wanted to know already.

He laughed nervously and looked at my shoes. "Well, that's up to you, really."

A crooked grin appeared on my face. "What do you want me to be?" I tried again.

"...I'd like you to be my girl. I just want to buy you everything you want, and snuggle with you, and kiss you when I want to. I've never felt like this about a girl before..." He rubbed the back of his neck and looked at me through his eyelashes, blushing.

I couldn't stop the huge smile that covered my face. I looked at him in disbelief. I couldn't be happier right now. "Niall, you're so corny! But it's adorable."

"Will you? Come on, have a heart. I'm going to die of nervousness. Answer me please?" He pleaded jokingly.

I stood on my tiptoes, grabbed his face in my hands, and kissed him. When I pulled away, he just stood there, dazed.

"I'm going to assume that was a yes?" He smiled.

I bit my lip and nodded my head quickly. "How could I say no to you, Ni? You're too cute."

He laughed and pulled me into one of his famous bear hugs. "I'm so happy right now, El." He kissed me again and smiled brightly. "I can finally do that without worries." He sighed.

I laughed at him. "You do realize every girl in school is going to try and kill me now, right?"

"Screw them." We laughed and he brushed the hair out of my eyes."Don't worry princess, you have a knight to protect you now."

I smiled at how sweet he was being, but then I laughed at it. "Stop! I feel like I'm in some teen romance novel." I laughed. Even though it still made me blush like crazy.

"Oh, you love it. I know." He winked at me, holding me close.

"I would invite you in, but it's late." I told him. It was easily close to midnight.

"That's alright, I understand. I'll see you tomorrow, okay?"

"Kay." I smiled as he kissed my cheek.

We hugged and kissed one last time before saying our goodbyes.

I ran to my room as soon as he left and pulled out my phone. I have to tell Liam!

Li-Li

Me and Niall are official now!! I'm so happy! This night was perfect!

Liam is going to be so happy for me!

I laid down on my bed and thought about tonight over and over until I drifted into a peaceful sleep for the first time in a long time.

I was finally happy again.

Chapter Text

Liam's P.O.V

"Hello, love." I greeted Eilana as she ran up to me, wrapping herself around me in a hug.

"Hey Li Li!" She beamed up at me.

I chuckled at her excited demeanor. She was such a kid sometimes, and I loved it.

"Hey mate." I nodded at Niall and patted him on the back.

"Hey." He smiled back. He seemed to be in a good mood.

"Let's find a good spot!" Eilana exclaimed, grabbing both of our hands. She led us around for a little while, stopping to look at things, until she found the perfect spot.

I watched as she tugged on Niall's jacket. "Niall, I want cocoa." She said cutely.

"Cold?" He asked, smiling at her.

She nodded her head and rubbed her arms. I could see her shaking. She must really be frozen.

"I'll be right back. Stay with Liam." He told her before walking in the direction of the hot cocoa.

I saw her roll her eyes and I laughed lightly. She's so cute when she's like this.

I walked over to her and wrapped my arms around her, rubbing her arms and her back gently, trying to warm her up. She snuggled into my chest, making me smile.

"Thanks, Li. It's fucking freezing out here!" She said. I could hear her teeth chattering as she tried to steal some of my warmth.

"It's because you're so tiny." I teased her.

She hit me on the shoulder playfully. "I am not! You're just freakishly big!" She joked back.

I smiled down at her, admiring her features. Her big blue eyes sparkled with excitement and wonder, her lips were curved into a perfect smirk, the tip of her button nose was pink from the bite of the cold, and her porcelain skin seemed to glow in the dim light. She looked like an angel.

I wish I could just stay like this. Holding her and staring at her beauty. I felt so happy and so calm, yet my heart was beating out of my chest. When I touch her skin, it's like an electric current runs through me, but it's the most incredible feeling. I wanted so badly to kiss her, but Niall had already made his way back. And from the looks of it, he wasn't too happy about what he was seeing.

He held the cup out to her and she let go of me to take it, giving him a quick hug and thanking him.

The absence of her tiny frame against my own already left me feeling cold. And I'm not talking about the weather. This was a different kind of cold.

I noticed she was still shaking after downing her warm drink.

"Still cold?" Niall asked her. He took his jacket off and put it around her, despite her protests. He continued to wrap his arms around her and rested his chin on her shoulder. He whispered something in her ear.

I felt the pang of jealousy wash over my entire body. I wanted that to be me. It was strange though, I've never felt jealousy like this before. I didn't want to hurt Niall. He's my best friend. But I did feel some sort of anger towards him. It's not his fault though. He doesn't even know how I feel about her.

As the time went on, I couldn't stop stealing looks at the two of them. I was so jealous, it was starting to hurt now. My whole body felt stiff, and it ached. My hands were permanently clenched into fists, and my jaw was tensed from grinding my teeth.

Suddenly Eilana asked me a question. I turned to her, trying to soften my features as to not give myself away. "I had to help my sister move the last few things to her new place." I answered, sounding rather dull.

She just shook her head and looked forward again. Niall on the other hand, struck up a conversation with me. Even though my mind was somewhere else, it went on for a while. I managed to listen just enough to answer him, but my mind was focused on Eilana, and wondering what she was feeling right now. She must be pretty happy, judging by the talk we had the other night. She really seems to like Niall.

I sighed but it went unnoticed by both of them, as that's when the fireworks started. I turned to watch them, but I didn't really enjoy them like I usually did. I just stared at them. They seemed dull to me. Everything seemed dull to me. Except Eilana. She shines brightly to me, blocking out everyone else.

I looked over to them again, just in time to see them kiss. This wasn't some innocent, friendly kiss. This was the kiss of two people who loved each other. I felt a burning in my chest. I wanted to look away, but I couldn't. It hurt but I couldn't tear my eyes away. I felt my heart sink. Slowly, it burned as it sank deeper and deeper.

After what seemed like an eternity, they pulled away with grins on their faces. That was it. That was all I could take. The way they looked at each other. It shattered me. I couldn't be here anymore.

I turned and walked away slowly. They won't even notice I've left. I should leave them alone together anyway. I made it back to my car and got in. I just sat there for a minute, thinking.

It's not fair. They're not even together. Why does he get to have her? I'm the one that helped her first. I'm the one she always comes to. Don't I deserve her? I've done everything I could to make her happy and be there for her, but I guess it's not enough. That's what I get for playing the big brother role.

I drove home finally. Trudging into the house slowly, I didn't run in to anyone thankfully. They would ask me what's wrong, but then I wouldn't be able to answer them. I don't even know how I feel right now.

I locked myself in my room. I laid on my bed, staring blankly at the ceiling.

If she's happy with Niall, then she should be with Niall. It's that simple. I just want her to be happy, right? So I need to accept that. And Niall is happy too. So that's a plus. But really, who am I kidding? I'm not happy. I was waiting for this day. The day that she would pick Niall over me. And I thought I could handle it, I thought I was so well prepared for it to happen, and that I would be happy for them because they would be happy. That's always how I was when it came to stuff like this. But this was different.

I've never had my emotions crash on me like this before. It's too much. I don't even know where to start. My thoughts are just running wildly in circles. Nothing makes sense. I was so sure I wouldn't feel like this. I didn't think it would affect me so badly. I should have known. I mean, it's Eilana I'm talking about. She means so much to me.

She saved me from that dull, unfulfilling, guilty life I was stuck in before, and brought me into the light. And now I can't thank her enough. She helped me find myself, and taught me to live life in a way that makes me happy, because it's the only thing that matters. But I can't be happy when the girl I love is with someone else. What am I supposed to do about that? If she's with him, I'm unhappy, but if she's without him, she's unhappy, and that makes me unhappy. I can't win no matter how I look at it.

All I can do is sit by and watch as they're happy. And that's what's really going to hurt me. Sitting there and having to suffer through them being all cutesy, coupley all the time. I don't know if I can survive that every day.

Wait what am I saying? I don't even know if they're together officially. I might still have a chance. Nah, she won't ever see me like that. It's not going to happen. She likes Niall, and there's nothing I can do about it.

Agh! This is so frustrating!

I rolled over and stuck my face in the pillow, pulling at my hair.

What am I supposed to do?

I laid there for what seemed like hours, but was probably only fifteen minutes, when I heard my phone go off. I rolled over and dug my phone out of my pocket.

Eilana

Me and Niall are official now!! I'm so happy! This night was perfect!

I stared at the screen for a minute, just taking it in. I sucked in a large breath. I was gripping my phone with such force that my knuckles were white. I couldn't help my reaction. I want to be happy for her. I really do. But I can't do it. Even though Niall is like my brother, I can't be happy for him. I'm selfish. I love her. I want her. I want her to love me. I want to be the one that she's so happy about being with.

I threw the phone across my room with as much force as I could. It hit the wall, leaving a small dent and I could see from here that the screen was cracked to pieces. But I really didn't care. I didn't care about much of anything right now.

My worst fear had been confirmed. She had friend-zoned me.

Chapter Text

"Hey princess." Niall kissed me as he appeared in my room.

I smiled at him through the mirror and finished putting on my makeup. He sat quietly, staring at me with a small smile on his face.

"Have I ever told you that you're the most beautiful thing on this earth?" He asked me, putting his arms around me and kissing my head.

I giggled at him and blushed. "Only about a hundred times now."

"Just making sure you know it." He laughed. "You ready, baby?"

I stood up and slipped on my purple converse. "Yep. Let's go." I grabbed his hand and dragged him out to the car.

Niall and I have been dating for half a week now, and our relationship is going great. He's more amazing than I could have imagined.

"Are you sure you want to take me shopping, Niall?" I asked as we pulled up to the mall.

He smiled and placed his hand on my thigh. "Yes. Why wouldn't I? You're my princess and I want to buy you stuff. Pick out anything you want."

I blushed at his hand placement and looked out the window. "But I feel bad. I can't just blow all your money."

He chuckled lightly. "Money, my darlin', is no object. Not when it comes to you." He leaned over and kissed my cheek. "You're worth more than gold and jewels."

I smiled at his words and giggled at his cuteness. "If you say so." I rolled my eyes.

~

"Niall." I called him.

"Yes, princess?" I heard him from the other side of the curtain.

I was trying things on in the dressing room, and not feeling too confident in the way I was looking.

"Can you look at this, please? I think it kind of makes me look like a planet." I turned in the mirror, looking myself over.

The curtain opened slightly and Niall quickly entered, shutting it behind him. "What are you going on about?" He looked me up and down, checking me out. A smile appeared on his face. "You look lovely in that dress. I like it. We're getting it." He put his hands on my shoulders, looking at me through the mirror.

"But I look like a planet!" I protested.

"Lovely." He argued back playfully. "And I'll be hearing no more out of you about the way you look. I'm your boyfriend and the only guys opinion that matters, is my own. And I'm saying, you look stunning." He smiled and popped my bottom lightly, causing me to shriek.

"Ni!" I turned around quickly in his arms.

"What?" He chuckled, scrunching his face.

"We're in public!" I harshly whispered to him.

He just laughed at me again. "Yes, but no one can see us." He smirked at me suggestively and leaned down, kissing me.

I pulled away quickly, all flustered. "Ni, we can't!" I was blushing and getting nervous that someone would find out.

"Shh. Don't worry about it." He smirked.

He put his arms around me and backed me in to the wall of the dressing room. He gripped my hair in his hand softly, tilting my head back. He attached his lips to mine again, kissing me sweetly.

Suddenly his kiss turned hungry as he let his lust take over. He bit at my bottom lip gently, while his hand wandered down to my lower back. He used his hand to close the tiny space between our bodies, pulling me in to him. His hand snaked lower until it rested on my ass. He squeezed it gently, making me gasp in surprise.

He pulled my head further to the side and kissed along my jawline. I was blushing at his gentle touches. He worked his way down my neck slowly, softly biting. I was practically limp in his arms. He knew exactly what he was doing to me, and I could feel his smile as his lips trailed slowly across my neck. I whimpered as he squeezed my ass again, moving his hand up my body slowly. He was doing everything slowly on purpose. He knew it drove me mad.

His hand crept up and grabbed my breast, massaging it through the dress. I let out a moan, squirming under his touch. He knew just how to touch, to make me crazy. I craved it. More of it. I played with his hair while he kissed down my collarbone. He nipped at my skin, making me moan involuntarily.

"Shh. You have to be quiet. Wouldn't want to get caught, now would we?" He whispered in to my ear.

I shook my head slightly, biting my lip. His deep voice was such a turn on. I could hardly register what he said. I was so distracted by the feeling of his lips, and my eyes had been closed for what seemed like forever. I was enjoying every second of this. He kissed me on the lips again and started to grind his hips in to mine softly and slowly. I was trying my hardest to suppress my moans but it wasn't so easy. A few escaped me, but thankfully they weren't loud. I only noticed now how hot I was getting. My skin was burning up. My face must be bright red right about now.

He finally pulled away and smirked at me. My head was swimming with thoughts of him and his mouth. I must have looked comical. I could barely keep my eyes open, and my body was shaking.

Niall looked me over and licked his lips. "You look beautiful like that." He kissed my cheek and fixed my hair for me, smiling sweetly. "Now, you should probably get dressed so I can buy that dress for you." He looked in the mirror and ran his fingers through his hair until it looked presentable again, and then he stepped out of the dressing room.

I took in a big breath and let it out slowly, trying to calm my body.

Sheesh. That was something else.

I started to take off the dress when Niall's head peaked through the curtain again. "I should take you shopping every day." He winked and left for good this time.

I laughed lightly to myself and got dressed. I stepped out with all the clothes, and Niall took them all off my hands, heading straight for the counter.

"Niall, you really don't have to-" I started, but he cut me off.

"I want to. Now would you quit being so concerned about it?" He chuckled, handing the man his card.

I rolled my eyes and kissed him on the cheek. "Thanks, Ni."

~

I walked in to school the next day, holding Niall's hand like usual. Everyone stared, as usual. And I ignored them, as usual.

If the entire female population of this school didn't already hate me, they did now. They were all stumped as to how I could score the Niall Horan.

"I'll see you after class, princess." He kissed me before leaving.

I waved after him, and shut my locker. I took a few steps before someone called my name and grabbed my shoulder. I turned around to see a panting Harry. I rolled my eyes. He didn't say anything so I just gave him an expectant look.

"Um.. can I talk to you?" He said hesitantly.

I gave him a raised brow look and bit my lip. "Not right now. I have to get to class." I turned to walk away, but he grabbed my shoulder again, turning me around. He let go quickly when he saw my more than displeased face.

"Then, can you meet up with me on your free period at least?" His eyes looked desperate.

I've never seen him like this before. It must really be important...

"...Okay, fine. Where do you want to meet up?" I sighed.

I can't believe I'm fucking doing this.

"Just meet me by your locker. I'll be waiting, okay?" And then he walked off in to the crowd.

Okay. That was weird.

I went about my day as usual. When I saw Niall and Liam later, I decided not to tell them about my meeting with Harry later. They probably wouldn't let me go. And I really wanted to know what was going on with Harry lately.

I saw Louis through the day. He seemed normal as usual. Still not happy looking, but he seemed well, at least. We waved to each other like we always do.

Free period finally came around and I headed back to my locker. Harry was waiting there like he said. I walked up to him and raised my eyebrow, waiting for him to say something.

"Um, let's find somewhere more...private to talk." He looked around.

He seems nervous...

"Oh no. We're not doing this again, Styles. You can forget about it." I turned to walk away. I was not about to put myself in that situation again.

"Wait! I swear it's not like that. Please! I just want to talk!" He panicked.

I sighed and glared at him until I was sure he was telling the truth. "Fine. But you can understand why I'm hesitant to go anywhere with you?" I crossed my arms.

"Yeah, I know. Sorry. I'll tell Liam and Niall where we're going if it will make you feel better about it? Just please let me talk to you?" He was practically begging now.

Did he just apologize to me?

I know I shouldn't, but I was feeling pretty smug about it. The Harry Styles was begging to talk to me. For once, he was the one that was suffering.

"No, it's okay. It's probably better that they don't know. But if you lay a finger on me, Styles, I-"

"I won't! I promise!"

I rolled my eyes and followed him, like the idiot I am.

We were standing in an empty room, and I was staring at him as he awkwardly looked around.

"Well?" I tapped my fingers impatiently against the desk I was leaning on.

"Look, this isn't easy for me, so... just- I'm sorry, okay?" He dug his hands in to his curls and looked at the floor.

I was confused. I gave him a weird, confused look, raising my brow at him. "What? Sorry for what?"

He sighed loudly, still not looking at me. "Just sorry. For everything. I'm sorry about the way I've treated you all this time. You don't deserve it, and I'm sorry, okay?" He finally looked up at me.

He's blushing. Harry Styles is blushing. No way.

"Are you blushing, Styles?" I taunted him.

He looked away quickly. "Look, like I said, this isn't easy for me. Honestly it's embarrassing. I've never had to apologize to anyone before, okay?"

"I can believe that." I smirked.

"Come on. I said I'm sorry." He pressed.

"And you think I'm going to accept your apology and let all my hate towards you go, and then life will be a fucking walk in the flowers for you? Look, I know your whole life has been served to you on a silver platter, but I'm not one of your servants, I'm not here to make things easy for you. And you're wrong if you think that after all you have said and done to me, that a simple sorry will make everything okay." I scoffed at him and looked away, annoyed.

"No, I didn't expect that. But I don't know what else to do. I'm not good at this apology thing yet. What can I do to get you to stop hating me?" He looked really sad suddenly.

I rolled my eyes at him for the millionth time ever. "You can start by staying the hell out of my life. And why would I trust anything you said anyway?"

"I know you don't want to trust me. I understand and I don't blame you. But you have to believe me when I say I'm sorry! I don't know how to make you understand that I really am so sorry. I don't want to do this anymore. Please, believe me." He put his hands together and his head down, begging.

I stared at him for a while, just thinking about all of this. I can't believe he's actually apologizing. How weird. I wonder why? What could possibly make him have a change of heart?

"Why do you care? If you only feel guilty about it, why not just apologize and leave it at that? Does it matter to you if I accept it or not? What's making you do this anyway?" I quizzed. I was curious. It just didn't add up to me.

"I just-I don't want to do this anymore. I never intended for it to happen. I didn't want it to become like this."

"I accept your apology. Calm down. I did all along, I just wanted you to know that even though I do, it doesn't fix anything." I explained.

A small smile formed on his lips for a second before it disappeared again. "Thank you. And I realize that." His voice was quiet. Much different than usual. I was used to his voice being loud and cocky. But now it sounded sad and desperate.

"So, are we done?" I asked impatiently.

"I want to know you don't hate me." He stated, looking at me with searching eyes. They were scanning my face for some sign of reaction.

"But I do. Why do you care if I hate you or not?" I was determined to get this out of him, whatever it may be.

He sighed loudly and started pacing back and forth, tugging on his hair. "It's hard to explain, let's just leave it at that. I want to at least be friends. Or civil to each other, anyway..."

"Why would I agree to be friends with you?" I was just getting more confused.

"I just thought, since you're friends with my friends now, and dating Niall, I should make an effort to be friendly to you. It would make it easier to hang out all the time. And you would have the guarantee that I wouldn't tease you anymore. I promise. Just please, please give me a chance!" He took a step toward me, falling to his knees and looking up at me. "Do I have to beg like a pathetic fool? Because I will."

I laughed at him. I can't believe this. "...Fine. You get one chance, Styles."

He shot up excitedly. "Thank you! You won't regret it! I promise!"

"Now hold on! This is not a promise that I will ever like you, or accept you, but you have a chance. Nothing more. You have to think about it from my point of view. I'm sure you can understand that I wouldn't want to let you in so easily. But I have one condition first."

"Okay. That's only fair. What is it?" He crossed his arms in interest.

"No touching. Do not touch me. Got it?" I asked him sternly.

"Got it. I promise, no touching." He held his hands up and smiled lightly.

"Don't fuck it up, Styles." I said as I walked out of the room.

"Eilana!" He called out.

I stopped in the doorway, looking back at him.

"Thanks. I know this isn't easy for you, but it means a lot to me. That might not make sense to you right now, but just trust me." He smiled genuinely at me.

"This is so weird." I mumbled as I walked out.

What the hell is happening? That's the last thing I expected.

~

I shut my locker and made my way to Spanish class, but when I rounded the corner, there was a large gathering of people standing in a circle around something. They were all being very loud and sounded worried.

I pushed my way through and looked at the sight in front of me. Louis laid on the ground. He looked pale.

"Louis!" I dropped my things and got on my knees immediately. I cradled him in my arms, shaking him slightly. "Louis wake up! Wake up!" I could already feel the tears threatening to fall. He didn't respond. He was completely unconscious, and completely unresponsive. It was scary. I'm so scared. I started crying and shaking uncontrollably.

What happened to him? Is he going to be okay? He has to be! This can't happen! It can't! It's not fair! It's not fair...

Chapter Text

"Louis! Louis please say something!!" I choked out. I didn't care that I was sobbing in front of all these people. They weren't important right now. Louis was the only thing I could see.

"Back up! Back up!" I heard an older man's voice booming at the people around us.

I looked up and saw two older men and the school nurse making their way through the crowd. They made their way to Louis and took him from me. I watched in horror as they carried him away.

Is he going to be okay? Where are they taking him? Can they help him? Will they know what to do?

The thoughts ran through my head so fast they made me dizzy. I don't think I've ever been so worried about someone before in my life. The room seemed to be spinning and none of this seemed real. I could still hear the chattering of the people around me getting softer as they made their way down the hall, dispersing now that there was no show to watch.

I made my way to the infirmary, hoping to find Louis awake and well, just to tell me that it was all a joke. Nothing more. How I wish that he would tell me that. That all of this was a joke. All of it. And we could be friends again. And life would be simple again.

I reached the school infirmary, but they wouldn't let me in to see him. They said I had to wait. I sat outside for what seemed like ages, waiting, thinking. Niall and Liam showed up after a few minutes. They said they got word of what happened and wanted to make sure I was okay. They wound up waiting with me. After about thirty minutes, the nurse said I could come in.

I stood up and took a deep breath. Niall stood as well and gave me another hug, kissing me on the forehead. "I'm sure he's fine, El. Don't worry about it. Ask him yourself. I'm sure he's okay." He reassured me.

"I just-I don't know if I should go in and talk to him or not. I don't know if it's the best idea..." I bit my lip in thought.

"You should go talk to him. I think it would be good for both of you." Niall said, rubbing my arms softly. "Okay?"

"Yeah, you're right. Okay. I'm going to talk to him." I nodded.

I walked in alone, and not yet ready to speak to him again. I saw the nurse walk out and she stopped to talk to me. "He'll be alright. He's just malnourished. He needs to eat some food and he'll be well again. You may go in and talk to him if you'd like." She made her way off in to another part of the room.

Because this school was so ridiculous, the infirmary was more like a tiny hospital. I slowly walked to the room he was in and opened the door, making my way in. I closed the door behind me and turned around to see him sitting up in bed, staring at me curiously.

"What are you doing here?" He asked as I walked closer to his bedside.

"Uh...I..was worried."

His brows furrowed slightly and he looked down.

"A-Are you okay?" I asked timidly.

"Yes, I'm fine." He answered quietly.

"How come you passed out? What happened?"

"I'm fine. I've just felt a little dizzy all day. I guess it had to do with that. But I'm fine now, so don't worry." He grinned at me, but I could tell it was fake.

"The nurse told me you were malnourished, Louis. Don't lie to me. I'm not stupid. I know you haven't been eating." I crossed my arms over my chest.

He sighed loudly and threw his head back. "Look, I just c-"

"There is no excuse, Louis. I don't care. Do you know how stupid that is?! Do you know how scared I was? When you were laying there, unresponsive as I prayed that you were okay?!" I raised my voice at him, angry that he would be so irresponsible.

He looked at me with curiosity. "You were there? When I passed out, you were there?" His face almost lit up.

"Yes! And I was scared to hell, Louis! How can you do this to me?!" I could feel the tears in my eyes again.

"I didn't think you would care so much. I thought you were done with me, anyway. I'm sorry, Eilana. I didn't think it would affect you. It's just that, I've been so depressed that I don't feel like eating. I've tried, but I can't keep the food down anyway. It's like I'm sick." He said, playing with his thumbs.

"Louis." I stepped closer to him. "I do still care about you. I always will. I don't hate you, you crazy loon. Honestly, you've been worrying me to death. I'm just glad you're okay."

A small smile appeared on his face. "Really?"

"Yes, really." I smiled back. "Please, Louis, just eat. Please."

He sighed and threw his head back. "I will. For you I will."

I looked at him questioningly. "Louis."

"I promise." He assured.

"Alright. Well, as long as you're okay." I looked at my feet.

"So..are we talking again, or?" He looked at me timidly, waiting for an answer.

"I guess so..." It was starting to get a little awkward and I didn't know what to say.

He smiled faintly and looked down. He didn't say a word after that, just smiled.

"So, I guess I should go so you can get some rest."

His smile dropped, but he nodded in understanding.

"See you around, Lou." I waved awkwardly and turned to walk out. Secretly hoping that he would call my name and tell me he just wants to be friends again, but he didn't. He was silent.

I could feel my heart cracking again. No matter how much I tried to deny it, I will always be heartbroken over Louis.

When I made it out of the infirmary, I saw that Niall and Liam were still sitting there waiting on me.

"What are you guys still doing here?" I laughed.

Their heads shot up. Liam was the first to speak up. "Is he okay?"

"Yeah, he's fine. He was just malnourished."

"And you talked to him? How did that go?" Niall asked nervously.

"It went...well." I clung to him, kind of out of it at the moment.

"Are you going to be okay then?" Liam asked.

"Yeah. I'm going to be just fine. Better than ever." I smiled at them. I hated lying to my friends.

~

I kicked off my shoes and laid down on Niall's bed. "Hey Ni?"

"Yes, princess?" He asked from his closet.

"I have to tell you something."

"Yeah?" He called back, letting me know he was listening.

"Um, well Harry and I had a chat today."

He came running out of his closet and looked at me with wide eyes. "Are you okay? Did he hurt you? I'll kill 'em!"

"I'm fine, Niall. He actually apologized to me and told me he wanted to be friends or something..." I trailed off, thinking about it.

Niall walked over to the bed and sat down next to me. "And? Did he seem sincere?"

"Well, I think so. But I don't really know him so I can't say for sure."

Niall nodded brushed some of the hair from my face as I stared at the ceiling blankly.

"What do you think about that? I mean, about us becoming friends? If it does happen, that is."

"I think it could be good. Just don't let him persuade you to do something you're not comfortable with. Even if it's just being friends with him. If he tries something, you tell me. I'll mess him up. Okay?"

I nodded and smiled up at him. He chuckled and leaned over me, planting a kiss on my lips. "So, you don't have any worries about it?" I asked.

He scrunched his face up cutely. "Well," He kissed me again. "I'm not going to lie, I'm a little scared that he'll steal you away from me. I mean, he is quite the charmer once you get to know him." He frowned slightly at his own words.

I giggled at his concern. "No, Ni. That's not going to happen. I really, really like you." I looked at him with adoration as the room fell silent for a moment.

He stared back, a sweet smile on his lips. "And I love you."

My breath hitched in my throat. Surely he didn't mean it like that. "Ni, I d-"

"Shh. I understand. You don't have to say it back. I don't expect you to. I just want you to know it." He brushed my cheek with his thumb and smiled at me.

"I-I love-" I started to say it back. I did love him. Even if I wasn't in love with him, I could still say it and mean it. But he cut me off with a kiss.

"Don't. Take all the time you need, don't rush it." He kissed me again.

I kissed back and reached for him, putting my arms around his neck. He crawled onto me without breaking the kiss and cupped my face in his hands. I ran my hands up his neck and played with his blonde locks. He moaned lightly when I tugged on them. I smiled at the sound and blushed at the fact that I could do that to him.

The way he kissed me made me feel beautiful. I could feel the adoration in it. The way he ran his hands along the curves of my body, taking his time to admire all of me. And the way he kissed me with such passion, stopping every now and then to mumble how beautiful I was.

I could lay here forever, getting lost with him. But unfortunately, the door swung open to reveal a very shocked and sickened Liam.

"Guys, come on. Really? You knew I was coming over." He shielded his eyes childishly and took a seat on the chair in the corner.

I laughed slightly and nervously. Gently pushing Niall off of me, I sat up and straightened myself out. "So...what should we do?" I asked the both of them.

Niall shrugged and Liam poked out his lips in boredom, also shrugging his shoulders. I sighed. "You guys..."

We sat in silence for a minute before I realized they weren't going to say anything.

"So uh, Harry and I had a chat today." I started to tell Liam.

"What do you mean exactly?" Liam questioned. "He didn't hurt you did he?"

I chuckled at him having the same reaction as Niall. "No. We just talked. He said he was sorry for everything and that he would like to be friends with me. He seemed pretty sincere, but I can't be sure."

Liam bit his lip in thought for a moment. "I think he's serious about this. This could be good. It means, if nothing else, he'll be nice to you." Liam told me. "You know how he's been meaning to do that for some time." He said quietly, raising his eyebrows at Niall.

"Oh I know. I know exactly. That's what makes me uneasy." Niall's face dropped.

I was getting so confused. They were clearly talking about something that I didn't know. It was so frustrating.

"Huh? What are you guys talking about? Meaning to do what for some time?" I threw my arms up and waved them around, shaking my head in confusion.

They looked at each other and made weird faces. Almost like they were communicating without speaking.

"Ugh. Will one of you please just tell me?" I rolled my eyes.

Niall opened his mouth and shut it, opening it again, he finally spoke. "Harry, well, Harry has wanted to befriend you for some time now. He-Well he likes you." He stuttered out.

Liam smacked his forehead and rolled his eyes. "You're not supposed to tell her that! Harry will be furious if he finds out."

I just raised my eyebrows at the words.

"Well I'm not going to lie to her! She's my girlfriend! What do you want me to do?" Niall defended.

"Guys, I don't get it. Why aren't you supposed to tell me that? And are you even sure? I don't think he likes me at all. Why would he be so mean to me if he did? And even if he does, what wrong with liking someone? I mean, he already told me he wanted to be my friend so it's not like a secret anymore. Besides, I find all of this very strange of him and I'm suspicious of it."

I seriously don't get why they're not allowed to tell me he wants to be friends with me? It's not a crime to like someone like that.

They both sighed in relief and relaxed. As if I didn't know something I wasn't supposed to after all. Seriously, they're so confusing.

"I think he's serious about this though." Liam said. "Remember a long time ago, when I told you that I couldn't tell you why he's mean to you because it's complicated?"

I thought back to that day, when I went to his house for the first time. "Yeah. He said the same thing as a matter of fact." I told them.

"Yeah. Well, that's because it kind of is. And he's not ready to tell you yet. And if I were you, I wouldn't push it. Because believe me, it will only make your life more complicated. And I know you don't want that."

I made a confused face and shrugged my shoulders. "Whatever you say, Leeyumm." I teased, giving up.

He stuck his tongue out at me playfully and chuckled.

"Hey lets go to a movie or something!" I suggested. It was hard to find things to do with an odd number of people.

"Sounds good to me." Liam agreed.

Niall nodded his head and got up, grabbing his keys. "Let's go then. And we'll get dinner after."

~

After dinner we went back to Niall's house to hang out, and decided we would go swimming. Even though it was freezing cold. We were stupid. I went to find my swimsuit that I left over here from the last time.

As much as I was happy with my relationship with Niall, I have to admit, I felt a little awkward with Liam around sometimes. Because Niall kind of pushes it in front of Liam and that makes me uncomfortable because I feel like Liam is always watching us.

Niall and I snuggled through the whole movie. He would occasionally steal a kiss. Although I felt a little bad for Liam as he was kind of alone looking. But he didn't complain once, even though he looked uncomfortable.

And later at dinner, Niall sat next to me so he could kiss me and rub my legs. No problem there. But Liam was sitting across from us so it was super awkward for me. I feel like if it was anyone else, it wouldn't bother me. But it bothered me that it was Liam. I don't even know why.

I stepped out in my swimsuit with my towel wrapped around me, feeling self-conscious. I walked out to the back yard where Liam was already in the pool. I stood awkwardly by the pool and wiggled my toes.

"Aren't you going to get in?" He asked, chuckling slightly.

"Yes, I'm just scared because I know it's freezing." I lied. Even though I was a little afraid of how cold it would be. Swimming on a November night was probably not the best idea.

He just stared at me in silence. I stood there looking around, trying to avoid his gaze. Suddenly, my towel was ripped from me and replaced by a pair of arms. "What are you hiding for, darling? Your body is amazing. You should show it off for me." I heard Niall's voice in my ear.

"Niall!" I swatted at him in embarrassment. I looked back to Liam who was staring at me with wide eyes. I blushed and crossed my arms over my chest, turning to the side shyly.

Liam noticed this and looked away quickly. "It's bloody freezing in here, mate!" He called to Niall who was walking around the pool to the diving board.

"Good! This will be fun then!" He said as he dove into the water, making a huge splash.

It made its way all the way over to me, almost soaking me. I was already freezing just standing out here as it was.

Eh, fuck it.

I thought as I jumped in from the side. It was so cold it was hard to move. I started to laugh at how shockingly cold it was. Liam and Niall started laughing too. We swam around and played for a while.

I stopped for a second to look up at the sky. It was so dark and you could see every tiny little star. I stared at it for a while. Niall swam up behind me and put his arms around me.

"What are you doing, babe?" He asked.

"Looking at the stars." I answered, completely mesmerized by them.

He started to kiss my neck, and all the way down my shoulder. He turned me around with a smile and kissed me on the lips sweetly. I kissed back of course. But I cut it short when I remembered that Liam was here. I put my chin on Niall's shoulder, stopping him from kissing me anymore. But he didn't take the hint and started kissing my neck again.

I looked at Liam across the pool and we caught each others gaze, locking eyes. It was weird. Like I couldn't look away. He had some kind of emotion in his eyes, but I couldn't make out what it was.

Niall's kisses got more intimate as he began to bite me softly, earning pleasurable moans from me. My eyes drifted shut for a second at the feeling before I realized that I was looking at Liam a second ago. I snapped my eyes open to see Liam still staring at me intensely. I blushed really hard at the fact that I just moaned in front of him. I felt awkward again. But we kept staring at each other. I moaned involuntarily a few more times before I was too embarrassed to function anymore.

"Ni, stop." I pushed him away gently.

"What's wrong, princess?" He looked worried.

"Nothing. Just...Liam." I said quietly.

I looked past Niall to see Liam getting out of the pool. He grabbed his towel and was drying off. His hair was soaking wet and the water was trailing down his abs.

Wow. He looks really sexy. His body. Oh my-Wait! I can't be thinking about Liam like that! I'm dating Niall! I like Niall! And Niall is just as sexy! I feel so bad now. How would Niall feel if he knew?! I'm a terrible person.

"Where are you going?" Niall asked him.

He smiled and put the towel down. "I'm just not feeling very well. I'll catch you guys tomorrow or something." He waved and then walked off, leaving.

That was weird. I wonder why he really left? He probably just felt really uncomfortable being single around the two of us. Still, that whole staring thing earlier was super weird. I wonder what that was about. I hope he's really okay...

Chapter Text

"Are you sure you're alright?" Niall asked me for the millionth time since last night.

After Liam left last night, I felt too weird about everything and I guess it affected my behavior towards Niall. I even left early last night. And now Niall is afraid it was something he did. But it wasn't. Well, not really. He had to do with it, but it wasn't intentional. I just wish I knew what Liam was thinking last night.

"Yes, Ni. I promise it's nothing you did. I'm not mad, and I'm not upset in any way. I just, feel a little weird for Liam. I mean, he's always around us but we're always so lovey-dovey in front of him and I think it's a little weird. Don't you?" I asked as I opened my locker.

He looked up in thought for a second. "Well, I don't really think he minds. He hasn't said anything about it has he?"

"No. But I still feel like it's a little awkward for him. Maybe we should tone it down. Just when we're around him. Honestly, even I feel a little awkward being that way in front of him." I told him, hoping he would agree.

He pouted at me, looking like a child. "But, I want to touch you and kiss you when I want. And that just happens to be most of the time. Can't Liam just deal with it?" He puckered up to me jokingly.

I pecked him on the lips and smiled. "Nope. I actually like Liam, and I don't want to scare him off completely just because you can't keep your hands to yourself." I joked, tapping him on the nose with my finger.

He pretended to bite at it and we laughed at each other. "Fine. But I'm not making any promises. It's not my fault that your body is so touchable." He smirked and gave my bottom a small pat.

I gave him a look, but he just smirked wider. He loved doing that kind of stuff in public. I rolled my eyes and shut my locker. He grabbed my waist and pulled me to him, giving me a kiss.

"Let's get to class. If I'm late one more time this week, Ms. Cooper will have my head." Niall joked, putting his arm around my shoulders.

We walked to the one class we had together. Upon arrival, I saw Louis sitting at his usual desk behind me. Niall walked to his seat by the window, smiling at me from across the room. I smiled back and walked to my seat. I smiled and waved slightly at Louis, giving him a small hello. I was surprised he was here today. I thought he would have taken some time off to rest, but he seemed to be fine again.

He smiled back and returned my hello. I sat down and smiled to myself before turning in my seat to look at him. "How are you?" I asked.

"I'm much better, thanks for asking. I actually ate today." He smiled. It seemed to be a genuine one this time.

"Good. I'm glad you're better. How's the family?" I asked, curious as I haven't seen them in a while.

"They're doing great. And your mum?" He smiled brighter.

"She's good. Still busy as always." I beamed back at him.

It felt so good to finally exchange more than a hello with him. I'm glad things are getting less tense between us. He doesn't seem to hate me at least.

I turned back around as the teacher told us all to hush as she began going on and on. I zoned out quickly, just happy thinking about everything. Maybe everything is finally getting better after all. I just have to take the bad to get to the good sometimes.

I sat there with a constant smile on my face for the first time in a while. I looked to Niall, who was staring at me. He shot me a toothy grin when he saw how happy I was.

Yeah, things are going to be just fine.

~

"Niall, you are not going to eat all of that." I stated plainly as he kept grabbing one thing after the other at lunch. "You're going to be sick."

"I am too. I told you, I didn't get to eat breakfast this morning. I was already too late as it was." He said, grabbing a slice of cheesecake.

I rolled my eyes at him. "What is with you and always being late?"

He shrugged. "I dunno. I like to sleep." He paid for my meal as well, against my protests, and we sat down with Liam.

"Hello buddy ole' pal!" I nudged Liam as I sat next to him.

He gave me a strange look and laughed. "Hey El." He gave me a quick hug and resumed eating.

We were joking around when a figure appeared in front of us. We all looked up to see Harry standing there, tray in hand with an unsure look on his face.

"Um, do you mind if I sit with you guys?" He asked. He sounded like we already rejected him or something.

They both looked at me and back to Harry. "It's up to her, mate." Liam stated.

Harry looked at me with an innocent, pleading look.

I thought for a second, and not seeing any problem with it, I decided it couldn't hurt anything. "Sure. I don't see why not." I shrugged and pretended it wasn't a big deal. But honestly I was still a little suspicious of him.

He sat down across from us and stayed quiet, hardly looking up to us every now and again.

"So how have you been? Haven't been around you in a while." Niall asked, trying to start up a conversation.

Harry looked up at him timidly. His eyes darted over to me and back to Niall. "Um, good I guess. Same as always, really." He replied, raking through his food slowly. "...You?"

"I'm great! Got myself a right beautiful girl on my arm! What more could I want?" He exclaimed, smiling at me.

I smiled back, but couldn't help feeling like he did that just to make Harry feel awkward.

Harry looked around the table at each of us, blank faced. "So uh, what about you Liam?"

"I'm good." Was the simple answer he gave. Nothing more. He shot Harry a friendly smile.

Harry nodded his head in reply and then looked to me for a moment. "And you? How are you doing?" He asked quietly, twirling his fork in his fingers.

I stared back for a second. "I'm fine, thanks."

It got pretty quiet at the table after that. Not until Liam threw one of his French fries at me did we get loud again.

I scoffed at him playfully and took one of mine and threw it back at him, hitting him right between the eyes. I pointed at him and laughed at my aim.

He laughed too and then pretended to be mad. "Hey! I could have lost an eye!" He joked.

"Oh, boo hoo! Someone call an ambulance! Liam's been hit by a french fry!" I teased.

"That's called a chip, little miss." He corrected.

"No it's not. It's called a fry. You guys call them chips because you're weird."

He rolled his eyes. "Well, you're in our country now. And those are called chips." He said, pointing to them.

I laughed and grabbed his finger, bending it back just enough to frighten him.

"Ow! Why are you trying to break my finger?!" He called out, snatching his finger away.

We all laughed, even Harry was laughing at our silliness. It was odd. Seeing him genuinely smile and laugh and just be happy in general. He could really be a normal person sometimes.

"You wimp. I'm not going to break it." I stuck my tongue out at him.

"Don't stick that out unless you're going to use it." He smirked.

I quickly shut my mouth and blushed at the thought.

Niall looked across me at Liam. "What did you just say to my girlfriend?!"

"Nothing!" He smiled like an innocent child and pretended nothing happened.

Niall laughed and shook his head. "Her tongue is reserved for my body." He smirked to himself and I hit him on the arm.

I looked up at Harry for a second to see him smiling and laughing at all the banter that was going on. He looked at me and I looked away quickly.

Having Harry at the table wasn't as weird as I thought it would be. He even joined in on some of the joking. He was actually pretty funny. It wasn't anything like I thought it would be. It was almost no different from usual.

~

"But I would rather play FIFA." Liam said, slightly pouting.

"Yeah, because you know I'm going to whoop your ass in Street Fighter!" I joked.

He laughed and poked out his lip. "So what if it's true? I'll admit it. You're good. But who's to say that I'm not letting you win?" He smirked.

I opened my mouth in shock and narrowed my eyes at him. "You better be joking."

His phone started ringing before he could answer me. He pulled it out and answered it.

"Hello? ...Yeah....uh huh....sure...let me ask." He turned to me. "Do you mind if Harry comes over?" He asked.

I looked side to side. "Nope."

"She said that's fine....yeah...okay...see ya, mate." He hung up and looked at me questioningly.

"It's not a big deal. He was a lot better than I thought he would be at lunch today." I said.

"Whatever you say. If he makes you uncomfortable for any reason though, you just tell me or Niall and we'll kick him out."

I laughed at him. "Okay. Good to know I have my own bodyguards." I shook my head at their ridiculousness.

"Hey Niall, Harry's coming over too!" He yelled to Niall in the kitchen.

After a few minutes, Harry showed up. He sat with us in the living room where we were playing FIFA. He joined in eventually. He even played against me once, but I won.

And you better believe I rubbed that in his face. As friendly as possible, of course. And after that we decided to watch a movie. We all agreed on Taken. Niall kept trying to kiss me throughout the movie, but I tried to remind him not to get too crazy in front of other people. He was pretty good about keeping it to simple pecks on the lips.

After that it was about dinner time and Harry said he had plans so he left. I told the boys that I was impressed by his good behavior so far, but voiced my opinion that I didn't think it would last for long.

We spent the rest of the day doddling around doing pretty much nothing and being lazy. But it was fun. Niall was good about keeping his hands off of me in front of Liam for the rest of the day, I was impressed.

~

I finished putting on my makeup and messed with my hair for a little while when there was a knock on the front door. I looked at the clock. 7:00pm. He was...right on time? How weird.

I ran to the door and opened it, revealing a very polished looking Niall. He was wearing a white button up with a black cardigan over it and black skinnies, finished off with all black sneakers. His hair was all done and he had a smile plastered on his face. He stood there looking all cute with a hand behind his back.

I stepped up to him and gave him a kiss.

"You look more gorgeous than usual, princess." He said, and held out a giant bouquet of beautiful red, purple, and white flowers. My favorite.

How does he even know? I never told him...

"Oh, they're gorgeous! Thank you, baby." I kissed him again and took them to the kitchen to get them some water. "I can't believe you're on time." I called back to him as he followed behind me.

"A gentleman doesn't make his lady wait." He smiled.

I giggled at him as he pulled me into a hug. "Well, Mr. Horan, I am very impressed." I ran my hands up his chest. He raised an eyebrow at me and smirked.

"Are you ready to go?" He asked.

I nodded my head. "Just have to get my shoes." I ran off quickly and put on my plain black pumps to go with my lacey red dress. I checked myself once more in the mirror before heading back out to Niall.

He whistled when he saw me walk out in my high heels. "Sexy." He wiggled his eyebrows at me and I blushed.

He held out my black peacoat and helped me put it on. Then we left.

"So where are you taking me to dinner that requires me to dress up?" I asked curiously.

He smiled as he was driving. "Somewhere. You'll see." Was all he would tell me.

I sighed in frustration. "It better not be too expensive, Ni."

He laughed. "You act like I don't have money."

I rolled my eyes. "Shut up." I joked.

We pulled up to what looked like a place made for celebrities. My eyes widened. "Niall no." I said simply.

He laughed again. "Oh, come on." He opened my door for me and practically dragged me out.

They sat us down and I looked around the place. Dark red walls, shiny black tiled floor that looked like it had bits of diamond in it, black cloth covered chairs, black table cloths, golden silverware and gold trimmed dishes, and dim lighting to finish off the mood. I'm pretty sure I saw some celebrities when we were walking through.

As soon as the waiter left, I looked at Niall and gave him a look. "You can't be serious. Are you sure you can afford this?"

He gave me a look. "Of course, princess. Just don't worry about it and enjoy it." He smiled, grabbing my hand from across the table.

I nodded and looked at the menu. When I saw the prices I almost had a heart attack. But I told myself to not worry about it, like Niall said. I picked out what I wanted and set it down again.

We chatted until the waiter came back. He asked us if we were interested in some wine, but Niall remembered that I didn't drink and told him no.

"You're not going to have any?" I asked him.

"I don't care for it that much. And I'm driving. Plus, I don't want to get carried away with alcohol around you." He grinned at me.

I giggled. "Oh. Is that when the beast comes out?" I teased.

He nodded and smirked. "And it's very hard to tame."

I giggled again. "You're so silly. I love it." I scrunched my face up at him cutely. He did it back and we chuckled at each other. "You're so cute." I thought aloud.

He smiled at me. "Cute? Not sexy?" He joked.

"Both, actually."

"Oh really?" He raised his brow at me.

I nodded just as our food came. It was so good. The most delicious food I've had in a while. But because of how fancy the place was, the portions were really small. I didn't want to say anything about still being hungry though. Niall paid for everything of course, and we left.

After we got in the car he immediately told me he was still starving.

"...Me too."

We both burst out laughing.

"Food run?" He asked.

"Food run." I confirmed.

We floored it to the nearest super market. We ran inside giggling to ourselves and rushed around the store gathering food and drinks. After we piled our arms full we made our way to the checkout.

We sat in his car and munched on all the snacks as we rocked out to music and laughed at all our lame jokes. After we were satisfied, we went to my house to chill out.

He opened the door for me and I walked inside and took off my coat. As soon as he made it inside and closed the door he grabbed me by the hips and kissed me.

I giggled at his impatience. "Ni, what are you up to?"

He put his finger to my lips and shushed me, smirking sexily. He kissed me again and picked me up, carrying me to my bedroom. He laid me down gently on the bed and crawled over me. He kissed me teasingly and laughed when I whimpered in annoyance.

"Ni, don't tease me."

He kissed me properly and pushed the hair out of the way, working his way down my neck now. I moaned when he nipped at the weak spot on my neck. He smiled against my skin and licked slowly back up my neck, kissing my lips shortly again. We smiled at each other and he moved down to my collarbone, kissing and sucking gently towards my chest. I felt myself blush when he moved his hands up my shirt. His hands were warm against my slightly cold skin, and the tips of his fingers were rough from the years of guitar playing. I shivered as his fingers trailed slowly towards my chest. I gasped lightly when he groped my breasts, massaging gently.

"Niall?" I moaned out.

"What baby?" He mumbled between kisses.

"...Nevermind." I mumbled back.

He continued kissing my body. I decided that I wanted to be the one pleasing so I flipped him around and straddled him. His eyes went wide at the sight of me smirking down at him. I kissed his lips and then his neck. I ran my hands through his hair and bit at his neck gently. He moaned and gripped my hair softly. I started grinding my hips slowly against his. He groaned again at the friction, and flipped me over, pinning me down gently.

"Nuh uh. Let me do all the work. I want to make you feel good, baby." He growled in my ear.

He kissed me right below my ear and my eyes fluttered shut. He ran his hands down my body slowly, until his hands reached my thighs. He pushed my dress up to my hips, placing his hand right below my navel, and painfully slow, he began to ease his hand lower, lower, until it was at the waistband of my underwear. But his fingers trailed right over it and kept going lower. I could feel my heartbeat quickening rapidly, and my breathing got ragged. I was nervous. I had never been this far before. My eyes shot open at the feeling of his hand rubbing me over my underwear. It felt so good. I arched my back slightly and looked at him. He was smirking down at me, and his eyes sparkled with something. Lust.

I blushed at all of it, not knowing how to react. I was finding it hard to breath properly and the sensation I was feeling from his hand was clouding my mind. He leaned down and kissed me while he was doing it. I was whimpering from the pleasure. I've never felt anything like this before. I was finding it hard to keep my eyes open, and let them drift shut. I reached up for him and ran my hands down his stomach until I found the hem of his shirt and tugged on it. He took the hint and quickly got rid of his shirt, throwing it somewhere behind him, he quickly placed his hand back between my legs. I could feel myself getting more sensitive to the friction.

"N-N-Niall?" I managed to get out between moans.

"Mmhm?" He raised his eyebrow at me, biting his lip.

"St-Stop. Please." I squirmed under his touch.

He stopped immediately and a worried look appeared on his face. "What's wrong, princess?"

I blushed. I couldn't even look him in the eye right now. I was so embarrassed. "Um.."

"What is it? You can tell me." He got off me and wrapped his arms around me.

"Um, it's just.." I couldn't get myself to say it.

He looked at me knowingly and smiled sweetly. "You're a virgin, right?"

I blushed harder and nodded, looking at my hands.

He chuckled slightly. "That's okay, princess. I understand. Don't let me do anything you don't feel comfortable with, okay? Just take it slow. I promise I won't pressure you. Take all the time you need." He smiled and kissed my forehead.

I nodded and grinned at how sweet he really is. "Thank you, Ni. For understanding." I looked up at him through my eyelashes.

"Of course, Eilana. I don't ever want to make you do anything you're not ready for. Just tell me if I'm crossing any lines." He rubbed my shoulder with his thumb soothingly.

I just nodded again, snuggling into his shoulder. I yawned suddenly and I could feel my eyes getting heavy.

"Is my El tired? Come on, let's get some sleep." He laid me down and went to turn the light off, returning to the bed. He snuggled up to me and kissed me on the cheek.

"Thanks, Ni. I love you." I smiled at him. I only meant it as a friend, but I really do love him.

He smiled back. "I love you too, Eilana. Now get some sleep."

I nodded and yawned again, letting myself drift off to sleep in Niall's arms.

Things really are looking up for me...

Chapter Text

"Ni!" I hit his hand away from the frosting. "I need that for the cake!"

He chuckled as he licked the frosting off his finger. I rolled my eyes and started to ice the cake. I was making a cake in Niall's kitchen and he was helping. Or at least he was supposed to. He seemed to be doing more tasting than helping.

"I don't want to go to tonight." Niall suddenly whined, sitting on the counter next to me as I frosted the cake.

I looked at him cutely and stuck my hip out. "How come? It'll be good to spend some time with your family."

His family was having a family night tonight, and they were making a big deal out of it. Going out to a fancy dinner and some kind of show and all that. I thought it was nice, but Niall didn't seem to be so excited.

He stuck out his bottom lip. "But I don't want to. I would rather spend time with my princess." He reached out and pulled me between his legs. He kissed me on the forehead and grinned at me cheekily.

"I think you'll be okay for one night, Niall." I looked up at him.

He pouted more but then cracked a smile, pecking me on the lips. "Fine. But I'll just be thinking about you the whole night."

I raised my brow at him suggestively. "Oh?" I rested my arms on his shoulders.

He nodded his head faintly. "Thinking about your lips." He kissed me. "And your skin." He ran his hands up and down my arms, kissing my shoulder. "And your scent." He nestled his face into my neck, inhaling my scent.

I smiled to myself and rubbed the back of his neck. "Is that all you ever think about?" I giggled.

He looked at me with a serious look. "No." He studied my face. "I think about your beautiful face, and how I'm infinitely happy when I'm around you. And I never stop thinking about how much I love you. That's always on my mind." He kissed me softly, hugging me to him.

I pulled away smiling. "I think you might have what most people call an obsession." I winked at him.

He laughed and poked me in the cheek. "Heyyy! I am not. Okay maybe I am." He grinned sheepishly.

I giggled and finished frosting the rest of the cake, putting it on the glass display stand they had. "Want some now?" I asked him.

He nodded his head quickly, licking his lips. I cut him a piece and put it on a plate, giving it to him with a fork.

"Good?" I asked as he took a bite.

His eyes rolled to the back of his head and he smiled, giving me a thumbs up. "Fucking delicious, babe."

I laughed and leaned against the counter. I looked at the clock. 3:47pm.

"So what are you going to do while I'm gone?" He asked me.

I shrugged, not sure yet.

"Why don't you go hang out with Liam? I'm sure he would be happy to see you without me for once." He suggested.

I nodded at the idea, thinking that sounded like a good idea.

It's been a week since the night I fell asleep in Niall's arms that night. Five weeks since we started dating. It was December 1st today. And for the past week or so, Liam hasn't really been hanging out as much. Actually, since Niall and I started dating, I haven't been around Liam alone once. I'm always with Niall. So I decided that I should pay him a visit alone. Just for old times sake. It'll be fun.

~

I hugged Liam as I got into his car. He was picking me up from home.

When I called him earlier and told him that I wanted to hang out, just me and him, he was excited and told me he would pick me up as soon as possible.

He hugged me back and kissed my cheek, beaming happily in my direction. "I don't remember the last time I saw you by yourself." He joked.

"I know! It's been too long, Liam." I smiled happily at him.

I forgot how much I loved being around Liam. Just Liam. He was definitely one of my best friends and I loved him to pieces.

He drove back to his house and we ran straight to the kitchen to get snacks and then to the theater.

He told me to pick out any movie I wanted. He said he was down for anything. So I browsed the giant collection of movies until I found one I hadn't watched in a long time. The Notebook. I gave it to him and he put it in, snuggling up to me on the couch.

I pulled my feet up onto the giant couch and laid my head on his chest. It was nice to be back to this again. I missed it. Of course I was happy with Niall, but I just missed hanging out with Liam sometimes. I just seemed to relax completely when I was around him.

After a while, the movie was starting to make me feel a little awkward being alone with Liam. I shifted uncomfortably against him. It didn't help that neither one of us was being chatty. It was just silence except for the movie.

"Eilana, are you okay?" Liam asked me after a few minutes of me shifting and being stiff against him.

I looked up at him. "Um, I don't really feel like watching this anymore." I told him as honestly as I could.

"Okay." He turned it off and looked back down at me sweetly. "What do you want to do, love?"

I put my finger to my chin for a second, thinking about it. "I just feel like chilling." I stated honestly.

He nodded his head and got up, pulling me with him. He led me to his room. I sat down on the side of the bed. He shuffled around and did a few things. I wasn't paying any attention to what he was doing. It was nothing important. I was too lost in thought. I couldn't stop thinking about one thing for a long time. For the last week I've been debating it.

"Hey, Liam?" I asked so quietly I was surprised he heard me.

"Yeah?" He looked my way.

"Can I ask you something...kind of...private?" I looked to the floor, feeling the blush on my cheeks.

He came and sat beside me. "Of course. You can ask me anything. That's what I'm here for. Now, what is it?" He looked at me.

"...It's about Niall and I." I started.

He nodded and waited for my next words, listening carefully.

"We haven't-I don't-Well, I can't decide if I should, you know..." I sighed and wiped my face. This was more awkward than I thought it would be. "I don't know if I'm ready yet." I finally got out. I stared at my hands, avoiding eye contact with him.

He was quiet for a second before shaking his head. "You mean about sex, right?"

"Liam!" I squealed and grabbed one of his pillows, sticking my face in it. It smelled like him. It smelled good.

He laughed at my reaction. "It's not a big deal. It's just sex, El." I could almost hear him rolling his eyes.

"Well it is to me." I pouted, falling into a laying position on his bed. I put my feet in his lap.

"Sorry." He apologized. "Well, let's see. Do you love Niall?" He asked hesitantly.

"Yes. Maybe. I don't know." I said honestly, sighing. "That's the problem Liam, I don't know."

He nodded and thought for a minute. "Do you want to give it to him? You don't think you'll regret it later?"

I looked at him with question. "How did you know I was virgin?"

"I assumed since you were making a big deal out of it that you were. And besides, you're so innocent, it's obvious." He smiled teasingly.

I blushed and laid back down. "I don't know. I think I might if we end up breaking up." I answered his previous question.

"Then don't do it." He said simply.

"But he's so good to me! And I know he loves me, and I feel like I might really love him too. I feel like I should at least be able to give him that." I expressed my thoughts to him.

"You don't owe him anything, El. Don't let him pressure you into anything." He warned.

I was quiet as I thought about what he said.

"Come here." He said as he grabbed me and pulled me up and closer to him. He put his arms around me and looked at me. "He isn't pressuring you, is he?"

"No. I just feel li-"

"Then don't worry about it. If you're not ready for it, if you're not one hundred percent sure of it, don't do it. He isn't asking you to is he?"

"No, but I jus-"

"Then don't. He seems to be fine with it. Just leave it as it is. Let it happen naturally. If it's going to happen, then it will. Just give it time. Think about it some more."

"You're right. Thanks, Liam. I can always count on you for good advice." I smiled up at him and kissed him on the cheek.

"And you promise me that he isn't pushing anything on you? Nothing?" He asked with a concerned face.

"No. I promise." I told him honestly. "Why do you think he would?"

"It just seems like he's a little pushy sometimes when I'm around you guys."

"...Oh." Was all I said.

He pulled me into his lap and started to rub my leg as I clung to him. I let my eyes drift closed at the feeling.

"Are you happy with him, El?"

I opened my eyes at his words, but kept my head on his chest. "Yes. Why?"

"No reason." He said simply as he continued rubbing my leg.

"I've missed this, Liam. I like hanging out with you. You really clear up my thoughts. Everyone else seems to only cloud them." I confessed quietly.

"I missed this too, Eilana." He kissed the top of my head and rested his head on mine.

We sat like that for a while. Just thinking about things.

"Liam?"

"Yes?"

"...How do you see me?" I asked, just curious about it.

"What do you mean?"

I pulled back and looked at him. "When you look at me, what do you see?" I asked again.

He was silent, just looking at me. "Well... I see someone who is brave, yet scared. Someone who is mature, yet still a kid. I see a smile, and the frown underneath. The struggles you've gone through and how strong you are. A funny, loud person, but shy as well. My best friend. Someone I love with all my heart. I see a beautiful person, and a gorgeous girl. I see perfection." He spilled all at once.

I stared at him in wonder. "And, what am I to you?" I asked shakily, afraid of the answer for some reason.

"You're my best friend." He said simply.

"Oh." I could feel the tension in the room disappearing slowly. I was a little sad at that answer. Although I don't know what I expected him to say.

"But, you're also the girl I would have taken for my own if my best friend had not caught your eyes first." He looked me in the eye.

I was shocked. "What?" I could feel the tension in the air stronger than ever.

"I like you, Eilana."

I was speechless. I had no idea. Suddenly everything clicked. Why he was acting strange lately. I get it now. I just stared at him in awe.

He pulled me to him gently and kissed me. I was shocked even more at this. But it felt right. I could feel something between us. I kissed him back, and he tangled his hands in my hair. He was so good. I felt so alive kissing him. But I felt so guilty. My mind was running wild. I stopped him and pulled away, breathless.

"Liam, I can't. Niall..." I trailed off.

He looked at me with a furrowed brow. "I know. I'm sorry. I just... wanted to do that. I'm sorry. I won't do it again." He said, looking down at my lap.

It was quiet. "Don't let this affect our friendship, okay?" He said.

"Of course not. I just didn't know you felt that way. It's a little weird, but I can get over it." I cleared my throat.

"I'm sorry by the way." I told him.

"About what?" He asked, confused.

"About not liking you first. I don't know why I didn't. I guess it was just because I've had a crush on Niall since the moment I saw him." I shrugged lightly.

He chuckled and hugged me to him again. "It's okay. Don't be sorry. You're so silly, love. I'm just glad you're happy."

I smiled too and snuggled into him again, putting my arms around his neck. "I do love you though, Liam."

"I love you too." He said as he traced circles on my thigh.

I closed my eyes and sighed, relaxing into his touch. His hands were so soothing. I was almost asleep when I felt his hand inching higher on my thigh. He was rubbing my leg like he always did, but every time his hand would come back up, it would go further up than the last time. I snapped my eyes open again.

"Um, Liam?" I managed to get out between shaky breaths.

He stopped immediately and removed his hand. "Sorry." He said quietly. "It's just, I want to touch you." He blurted out. "...I'm sorry. Please forgive me. That was very rude of me." He scolded himself.

I stared at him with wide eyes. I couldn't believe what I was hearing.

Did Liam just say something dirty to me? What the actual hell? And why do I feel weird? I feel... turned on.

"You're just so... I'm sorry, Eilana. I should shut up now. I'm making a fool of myself, being so forward like this." He looked down in shame.

"It's okay. I understand. I'm sorry, it's my fault. I shouldn't be so touchy with you when I have a boyfriend. Even if it is just friendly." I thought aloud.

We looked at each other again. The feeling in my stomach wasn't going away. And I wasn't sure if it was lust, or guilt. Maybe some mixture of both. He kissed me again. It happened so fast this time I didn't have time to process that it was wrong and I just went with it again. His kiss was intoxicating. I couldn't think clearly. My mind was only full of Liam. I ran my fingers through his hair. I couldn't get enough of him. But this time, it was Liam who stopped it.

"Sorry!" He exclaimed as he pulled away. "I'm so sorry. I thought I could control myself. Dammit!" He rubbed his forehead and I got up from his lap.

"It's partly my fault too. I told you." I said, trying to come to terms with what I had just done. I sighed and put my hands on my hips.

"Are you going to tell him?" He asked as he looked up at me with shame on his features.

"No I'm not going to tell him. I don't know. Should I?" I didn't know what to do about it.

"I think you should, Eilana. It was my fault anyway. I'll take the blame. Just let me tell him." He suggested.

"No! Don't do that!"

"You need to tell him though, El." He pushed with it.

"I'll think about it. For now I think I should just go home." I told him.

He nodded and looked around. "Okay. Come on I'll drive you." He started to stand up but I stopped him.

"No, it's okay. I'll just walk." I told him, making my way out.

"You can't walk home, it's dark out there." He motioned to his window.

"I'll be fine. And, no hard feelings right? I mean, we both know we shouldn't have done that and now we'll just move on and forget about it, right?" I asked him.

He stared at me in uncertainty for a second before agreeing. He sighed and dropped his hands to his sides. "Yeah, okay."

I hugged him lightly but he barely hugged me back. I smiled at him and made my way for the door.

"Please be safe! Text me when you get home?" He called after me.

"Of course." I smiled back at him before I shut the door and made my way home.

~

The next day was a Sunday so everyone was gathering at Niall's house to hang. So it was Niall, Liam, Harry, and even Zayn was coming over. Plus me, of course.

After the last month or so, Harry and I have become a little friendlier, but I still don't fully trust him. We joke around and have a laugh together most of the time.

I could hardly look Niall in the eye when he picked me up this morning. He had no idea what happened and I planned to keep it that way. But the guilt I was feeling constantly was killing me inside.

"Hey, mate!" I heard Niall greet Harry at the door, followed by Zayn. Liam wasn't here yet. But boy was it going to be awkward when he did get here.

They followed us to the living room where we all had a seat and Niall turned on the PlayStation, grabbing a controller. Harry grabbed one too and sat on the floor next to Niall. "I'm going to crush you!" He joked.

I zoned out and looked round the room. I made eye contact with Zayn for the first time since he's been here. He was seated on the other couch, diagonal me.

He sneered at me and looked away. At least he wasn't being a cocky little bitch. I would rather him ignore me.

After a while, I looked at the clock. It had been a half hour and Liam still wasn't here. Niall and Harry were so deep into their conversation, that when they got up to get drinks, they didn't even realize that they left me alone with Zayn.

I looked at him, feeling nervous. He noticed my staring, and stared back at me for a while. "What?" He spat suddenly.

I flinched at the sound of his voice.

"Do you think I'm going to try something? Forget about it." He said, looking to the side.

"And why not? What happened to your brave side?" I questioned, narrowing my eyes at him.

"Because I don't want the shit beat out of me again. Yeah, thanks for that." He grinned sarcastically.

"What?" I asked. "Oh, Niall." I said remembering.

"No, Harry." He corrected. Looking at me like I was a dumbass.

"Harry? But didn't he tell you to do all those things to me?" I asked, confused again. I thought I had it figured out.

"No. Why would he do that? Those were all acts of my own. It's because you're so damn sexy. But then you went and told on me, and then Niall beat the hell out of me. As if that wasn't bad enough, Later that day, Harry beat the absolute shit out of me for messing with you."

My mouth dropped open in shock. I can't believe it. I thought I had it all figured out and I was so sure of myself that Harry had put him up to it. But I was wrong.

Maybe Harry really isn't as bad as I thought... But he still can't be trusted.

Niall and Harry came back in the room shortly after that but Niall sat down next to me this time, putting his arm around me and kissing me on the lips. Harry sat down next to Zayn.

"Where is Liam?" Harry asked.

"I don't know. Have you talked to him?" Niall asked me.

I stiffened up and shook my head no.

It was almost an hour since everyone got here, and Liam still wasn't showing. I hope I wasn't the reason for his absence. I would feel terrible if he thought he couldn't come hang out with his friends because of me.

I really hope he shows up. Even though I can't imagine how awkward it will be with Niall here too. But I don't want him to stop hanging around even more just because of what happened. I really hope that didn't affect our friendship. I wouldn't be able to make it through life without Liam. I need him.

Chapter Text

"He tells me to fuck off, so I threw a punch and hit him right in the mouth. Blood just starts pouring everywhere! Long story short, he won't be mouthing off to me again." Harry started laughing at his violent actions.

I sat there, looking wide eyed at Harry's story about what happened the other day. Zayn and Niall were just laughing at it along with Harry while I was just disgusted at his behavior.

"What did I miss?" I heard a familiar voice, and tensed up. I turned around slowly to see Liam smiling around at the guys. He finally looked my way and his face dropped for a second before his smile picked back up again, and he waved at me slightly.

I just smiled back and turned my head away, not knowing how to act around him now. Not to mention the pang of guilt that just washed over me again. I felt disgusted with myself, sitting here, Niall's arm's wrapped around me as he was smiling and happy, completely clueless about what his two best friends have been up to behind his back.

"Nice of you to finally join us, mate." Chimed Zayn.

Liam shot a smile in his direction and made his way through the living room. He took the seat next to me on the couch. So now I was right in between Niall and Liam.

How ironic.

I inched closer to Niall and kissed him on the cheek. Just hoping that I could make this sickening guilt go away. Niall smiled down at me and kissed me back. I forced a smile and looked away.

They were having some kind of conversation, but I didn't hear anything they were saying. I was thinking about all the ways that this could go wrong. I started getting more and more sick as I thought about how I might break Niall's heart if he found out. That's the last thing I want. I don't think I could live with myself.

The feeling of someone patting me on the leg brought me back to reality. I snapped my head up and saw that it was Niall.

"Helloooo? Are you okay?" He asked me.

"Hm?" I closed my eyes and shook my head slightly for a moment, trying to get a hold on what was going on.

"You weren't responding to me." He said, a goofy grin on his face.

"Oh. Yeah, right. Sorry, I was thinking about something." I explained.

I noticed everyone was looking at me. I felt like somehow they could all tell what I had done. Even though I knew they didn't. Well, except Liam, that is. I glanced at him to see that he was looking at me too, guilt evident on his face.

"You've been really quiet all day, El. What's up?" Niall asked.

"Nothing. I just don't feel very talkative today is all." I smiled nervously and tucked some hair behind my ear.

"Hey, what did you two do yesterday while I was gone? You didn't do anything fun without me, did you?" Niall joked.

I tensed up and forced a laugh, as well as Liam. "Oh, no. Nothing fun. We just chilled out. Right, Liam?" I looked to him for help.

He looked at me unsure at first, but then he shook his head and agreed with me. "Yeah, just a normal day. We watched some movies, played some games, and rocked out to some music. You were missed." He joked at Niall, covering up effortlessly.

Wow. Good cover up Liam. I didn't know he was so good at lying...

"That's because I'm the life of the party! Everyone misses me." Niall joked, smiling pridefully.

I rolled my eyes and laughed at him. "Or so you think."

Everyone laughed as Niall stared at me with narrow eyes, pretending to be mad.

"Ouch! She told you!" Harry laughed.

I looked at Liam and he was looking at me. I smiled weakly and looked away. I felt Niall pull me into his lap and he kissed me on the lips. But now I was facing Liam. Awkward.

I was fidgeting with the ponytail holder I always had, and I was twirling it around in my hands when I dropped it. I leaned over to get it, not noticing that I was pushing up against Niall. I heard him groan lowly as I sat back and I blushed, just now realizing what I had done.

"Getting a little lap dance are we Niall? Does she give you those often?" Harry joked, making me blush harder.

"Yeah Niall, a girl sitting in your lap is a little bit sexual for public, don't you think? Maybe you should get a room." Zayn teased him.

I looked up at Liam and we locked eyes. If it wasn't awkward enough already, then it definitely was now. Oh wait, there's more.

Niall put his arms around me and pulled me closer to him, sticking his tongue out at them. "You're all just jealous because I get one and you don't." He jokingly started to grind into me, earning laughter from the two boys. Liam on the other hand, didn't find it too funny. His fists were clenched and I could tell he was grinding his teeth. My face turned a shade of crimson and I covered it with my hands.

"Ni! Stop it!" I laughed, feeling embarrassed at the forward display.

He laughed at me and licked my cheek like a dog. I made a weird face and wiped my cheek. I felt my phone vibrating in my pocket. I dug it out and went upstairs to Niall's room. They were just too loud. I looked at the screen.

Mom

“What's up, mom?”

Hey honey! Where are you? I thought you would be home?

“I'm at Niall's.”

Oh, okay. Well I just wanted to tell you that I'll be going on another trip out of town and I want to make sure you have a place to stay.

“I'll check and see if I can stay over here or something. How long?”

Just four days. But you know how I'm paranoid about you being home alone.

“Yeah, yeah. I'll ask him and get back to you on it, okay?”

Alright sweetie. I'll see you later then. Love you!

“Love you too. Later.”

I hung up and made my way down stairs.

When I made it back to the living room, everyone but Liam was gone. He sat silently on the couch. He looked to me when I entered.

"Where is everyone?" I asked nervously. Being alone with Liam again so soon was making me nervous.

"They all went to the store. Niall wanted some soda that he didn't have here, and Zayn needed more smokes. Harry just tagged along I guess. Niall didn't know where you went so he asked someone to stay behind for you." He explained simply.

"And you thought it would be a good idea for you to stay here alone with me?" I asked him.

"Well I think it's a better idea than having Harry or Zayn stay here with you."

He has a point.

I just nodded and turned around. "I'm going to get a drink." I told him as I walked out.

I made it to the kitchen and opened the refrigerator to look at what they had. I browsed over the many selections before finally deciding on a bottle of water. I closed the door to see Liam standing there. I was startled to see him and I dropped the bottle to the ground. It busted open and the water was pooling out onto the floor, the cold liquid soaking my feet.

I started to ask him what he was doing standing there like that, but he grabbed me before I could say a word and kissed me. I started to push at him, but I gave in within seconds. Kissing him was like nothing I had felt before. I don't know what it was, but I was addicted.

He picked me up and set me on the counter, running his tongue over my bottom lip. I opened my mouth for him and his tongue explored my mouth. His hands made their way to my thighs, rubbing them slowly. I had never been kissed like this before. He was so experienced with all of this, while I didn't know what to do. I wrapped my arms around his neck and played with his hair. He directed his attention to my neck, slowly sucking at the skin beneath my ear. I was whimpering at the feeling of his tongue on my skin. I couldn't hold it in as I moaned his name. It pulled me back to reality. I pulled away and put my hands up.

"Liam, we can't do this." I told him.

He looked at me blankly. "Then why haven't you told him?"

"Because! It's harder than you think! I can't just turn to him and be like, 'Oh, by the way, I kissed your best friend last night' yeah, right! So easy, Liam!" I spat at him, frustrated at myself for allowing such a thing to happen.

He sighed and looked to the side. "Do you want me to tell him, then?"

"No!" I said angrily. "I don't want him to know! I just want to be done with this. It's wrong, and I can't do it." I said, hanging my head in shame.

"Apparently you can do it. It seemed to me like you were enjoying yourself." He raised his eyebrow at me, smirking.

I looked at him in disbelief. "Excuse me? That doesn't make it any less wrong. Nor does it make me feel any less guilty about it."

He leaned in closer and I could smell his cologne. It made me weak. "But you do want me." He whispered in my ear, barely brushing it with his lips.

He was right. I did want him, and he knew it. But I couldn't. I wouldn't give in this time.

"No, Liam."

He smirked again. "I know you do. And I want you, but unfortunately you're dating someone else."

"Yes. And that someone happens to be your best friend. You don't feel bad about it?" I asked him, trying not to get sucked into him again.

He looked down for a second, looking a bit sad. "I do. I feel terrible. But now that I've had you once, I'm addicted. And my addiction is stronger than my guilt." He kissed me again, cupping my face.

I could feel myself weakening as I tried to fight it, but I got lost again. Who was I kidding, I was addicted too. Something about the danger of it and the fact that it was forbidden only made it more exciting. It thrilled me in a way, and I loved it.

He grabbed my thighs and pulled me forward so I was at the edge of the counter and our bodies were flush against each other. He kissed me as he ground his hips against me until I felt drunk. I was becoming disoriented from the sensation. My eyes rolled back and I put my arms around him, leaning on his shoulder as he kissed down my neck. I mumbled his name over and over again, too gone to make out other words. I snaked my hands up the back of his shirt, feeling his big back. He groaned when I lightly scratched down his back slowly. I could feel the vibrations on my neck. He slid his hands up my shirt too, rubbing my back.

"Liam?" I mumbled into his shoulder.

He didn't respond.

"Liam, stop. I can't. We can't do this, I told you."

He stopped and looked at me.

"Liam, we're making out in my boyfriend’s house. Do you hear me? We are making out in my boyfriend and your best friend’s house, while he's gone for ten minutes. This is so, so wrong. I can't do it. I don't want to do it." I ran my hands over my face, feeling disgusted with myself now that it was all sinking in.

He tried to kiss me again.

"Liam! Stop! What are you doing?! Did you not hear me?!" I was outraged at him. "Are you kidding me?"

He sighed and grabbed my face, kissing me anyway. I tried to pry myself away from him, but he was obviously stronger than me. I still struggled against him regardless. He stopped for a second and rolled his eyes.

"You know I wouldn't do this if I thought you didn't want it. But I know you do. I can tell. It's obvious. Look, if you really don't want to do this, then you have to tell Niall." He said, tilting his head and looking at me expectantly.

".....You know I can't do that." I looked up at him sadly.

"Well, you have to pick one, and if you're not going to tell him then you're basically agreeing to keep doing this. Because let's face it, we're going to keep on until he knows. And how do you think that's going to end up?"

"...I can't believe you're saying this. Or doing this. You've always been the angel on my shoulder, and now you're tempting me to do something bad."

He smirked slightly and put his fingers under my chin, lifting it up to look him in the eyes. "That's what you do to me. And only you. I would never do this for anyone else, but you... there's something about you. It drives me mad. Ever since you left last night, I couldn't stop thinking about you."

"Liam, please. You're making this harder for me than it already is." I turned my head away.

"Why not just let me tell him then? Problem solved." He said nonchalantly.

"No! I told you no."

"It's because you don't really want to stop. You don't want to, do you? You're just saying that because it's what you should say." He came closer to me again. Our noses were touching as I looked up into his eyes.

"I-I-want-" I didn't get to finish before Liam started to kiss my neck again.

My mind was becoming cloudy once more when we both heard an alarming sound. The front door opening. We stopped and looked at each other. He quickly stepped back and adjusted himself as I hopped off the counter, adjusting myself as well when I felt something wet on my feet. I looked down to see the water still on the ground. I ran over and grabbed some paper towels and put them on the floor, trying to clean it up quickly. I heard the boys voices getting louder and louder as they neared the kitchen.

"What happened?" Niall asked as he looked down at me wiping at the floor.

"Uh.." I blanked out, still dizzy from all that happened earlier.

"I scared her because I thought it would be funny and then she dropped her water." Liam covered again.

"Oh." He said simply. "Why are you all scarlet?" He asked, referring to my red face. I forgot I was blushing from Liam and I's little session earlier.

"It's because I was scared, duh." I covered quickly, hoping he believed me. He did.

I stood up and threw away the soaked paper towels. I turned around and Niall was there waiting for me. He wrapped his arms around me and leaned me back, kissing me. He stood me back up and winked at me. "I missed you." He said and walked out with the other guys.

I felt my heart sink to the floor and I wanted to cry. I couldn't bear this guilt. I looked over at Liam who was the only other person in the room with me anymore. He raised his eyebrow at me, chewing on his lip.

I sighed and closed my eyes. I felt someone peck me on the lips after a while. I snapped my eyes open. "Liam!" I harshly whispered at him, giving him a disapproving look. He smiled and kissed me again shortly. After that he walked out.

I fell down on the floor and leaned against the cabinets behind me. I sat there, alone, feeling even more guilty than before.

But what was worse, Liam was right. I wasn't so sure I wanted to stop.

Chapter Text

"What are you doing, darlin'?" Niall asked as he wrapped his arms around me from behind.

I was looking at myself in the mirror in Niall's room. I felt sick to my stomach. The girl staring back at me wasn't myself. I didn't know her. I've changed. I let my lust get the better of me. Something I never had to worry about before. I wanted to just take everything back. I wanted to rewind and take all of it back. I would've been more careful around Liam. I wouldn't go to his house that night. That one night. That one little slip up. It became something so monstrous. It has ruined everything. It has caused me so much pain. And it's going to wind up causing Niall pain too.

I feel so bad. No. Bad doesn't even begin to cut it. I hate myself. What have I gotten into. This mess, there's only one way to end it. But it's so hard. I don't want to tell him. I don't want to see him upset. I want him to be happy always. I want him to and smile and laugh. I don't want to be the cause of his pain. I don't think I can take it. But I have to. I have to take the consequences of my actions. I've decided that I'm going to tell him. I just have to wait for the right moment.

"I'm just looking at myself." I answered boredly.

He put his chin on my shoulder and looked at me in the mirror. "You look perfect. Don't worry about it." He smiled at me.

I could feel the guilt eating away at me. Why does Niall have to be so sweet and perfect? It makes this so much harder.

He laid a kiss on my neck softly, smiling into my skin. "You are always perfect. That's why I love you so much. You're so sweet and innocent. You could never do wrong. You wouldn't hurt a fly. I love that about you. I know you would never hurt me, and I would never hurt you. We're perfect for each other." He turned me around in his arms and kissed me lovingly.

I felt like someone had stabbed me. And every word out of his mouth was only twisting it in further. I was in actual physical pain. I've never felt worse in my life. I could feel the water pooling in my eyes. I tried my hardest to stop the tears, but they were running down my face and into Niall's shirt as I clung to him. I hoped he wouldn't notice, but I couldn't stop the sob that escaped my mouth.

He pulled back and put his hand under my chin, lifting it to look into his concerned eyes. "El, are you crying? What's wrong princess? Are you okay?" He asked, studying my face for answers.

I just shook my head and buried my face in his shoulder. I was full on sobbing now. I couldn't hold it back. I don't deserve him.

Niall pulled me back again. "Look at me. What's wrong, darlin'? Tell me, please?" He kissed my cheeks where the tears had fallen and put his forehead against mine. "Baby, please don't cry. I hate to see you cry. It breaks my heart. What can I do to help? I'll do anything." He looked at me with sad eyes.

I couldn't even look him in the eye. "You can't help, Niall. You're just making it worse! I can't do this!" I gripped his shirt in my clenched fists as the tears kept coming. It was only getting worse.

"What do you mean, Eilana? You can't do what?" He asked me, confusion etched on his features.

"This! Us! Why me? You're too good for me! I don't deserve you Niall! I'm no better than the dirt you walk on. Can't you see? I'm terrible! I hate myself! And you should hate me too! Please, please tell me you hate me! Say that I disgust you! You don't want to be with me!" I poured out to him in hysterics. I felt like I was going to go crazy.

I couldn't even see for all the tears in my eyes, and my whole body hurt. I felt broken. And I didn't even want to imagine how Niall would feel when he found out.

His eyes went wide at my words and he grabbed me by the arms, shaking me gently. "Eilana, calm down! What is wrong with you?! What are you talking about? Do you hear yourself? You are not a terrible person! Nor are you dirt! It is I who doesn't deserve you! You are wonderful and beautiful and gracious and kind and humble and by far one of the best people I know! You do not disgust me in any way! Of course I want to be with you Eilana. I love you. Please don't say those things. It hurts me to know that you think of yourself that way. Why can't you accept that I love you how you are? Baby, please listen to me." His eyes started to cloud with tears.

I looked up at him. "Stop! Don't say those things!" I was finding it hard to breath now. This was too much. I felt like my body was going to shut down if he didn't stop.

He looked down at me with hurt in his eyes. "Please, Eilana. I can't hear you say this. I don't deserve you. Really, I don't. I'm so lucky to be with someone like you."

"No! You don't understand! You don't get it Niall! You don't know what I've done! I can't bear this! Please! Please... just stop." I broke down finally. My legs gave out and I fell to the ground in a heap.

Niall bent down in front of me and looked at me sadly. "El, why are you doing this to yourself? Is there nothing I can do to make you stop this? Make whatever you're feeling go away?" He brushed my cheek with his thumb.

I shook my head and put my face in my hands. He sighed and ran his fingers through his hair. He sat down and pulled me into his lap, cradling me in his arms.

"Eilana, baby what's wrong? Please just tell me. Please? I'm begging you." I could hear the hurt in his voice.

I shook my head again. "No, Niall. Not right now. I don't want you to get hurt." I told him, sniffling.

He was silent for a moment. "I don't understand. What would you tell me that would hurt me?" He asked, more to himself than to me.

I didn't respond.

"Look, I understand that whatever this is, it's hard for you to say. So take your time. I can wait, okay? No matter what I'll still love you. You know that right? Just please don't cry, love. It's seriously so upsetting." He told me calmly.

He held me in silence for a while, rocking me slowly and kissing the top of my head.

"Niall?" My voice was so low and lifeless.

"Yes princess?" He held me tight to his chest.

"Will you sing to me please?" My voice cracked.

He was silent again for a few seconds. And then suddenly, his beautiful voice could be heard, clear as crystal in this empty house.

I think that possibly, maybe I'm falling for you
Yes, there's a chance that I've fallen quite hard over you
I've seen the paths that your eyes wander down, I wanna come too
I think that possibly, maybe I'm falling for you

No one understands me quite like you do
Through all of the shadowy corners of me

I never knew just what it was
About this old coffee shop I love so much
All of the while I never knew

I think that possibly, maybe I'm falling for you
Yes, there's a chance that I've fallen quite hard over you
I've seen the waters that make your eyes shine, now I'm shining too
Because, oh, because I've fallen quite hard over you

If I didn't know you, I'd rather not know
If I couldn't have you, I'd rather be alone

I never knew just what it was
About this old coffee shop I love so much
All of the while I never knew

I never knew just what it was
About this old coffee shop I love so much
All of the while I never knew
All of the while, all of the while it was you

He finished. I looked up at him and his eyes were sparkling down at me. A smile crept onto his lips and he leaned down and kissed me. "I love you, Eilana."

I wanted to say it back. I really did. But I couldn't bring myself to say that to someone I had betrayed. I did love him. With all of my heart. But, I still wasn't sure if I was in love with him. And after all of this, it made me question it even more. How could I do this to someone who loves and trusts me so much?

The last thing I remember is breathing in his scent as I drifted off. I awoke later in a soft bed, all snuggled under the covers. I soon identified it as Niall's bed and looked around for him. He wasn't here though. I laid back down and sighed loudly. Then I heard a door opening. I looked over to see Niall come in.

When he saw that I was awake, he smiled at me and walked over, sitting next to me. "Feeling better?" He asked, brushing some hair behind my ear.

"Yeah." I lied slowly. I still felt terrible, and I would continue to for who knows how long.

"Good. I was getting scared about you earlier. I was really upset that you were unhappy." He smiled weakly.

It was quiet for a while after that. We were clearly both thinking about something.

"Um, Niall? Can I ask you a favor?" I fiddled with my hands nervously.

"Of course. Anything at all." He smiled and placed his hand over mine.

"Mom is going out of town. Can I stay here with you until she gets back?" I finally looked at him.

His smile got wider and he hugged me. "Absolutely! I would be more than happy to have you! And I know my parents won't mind. When is she leaving?" He poked my cheek playfully.

"Tonight." I replied simply.

He shook his head and grinned at me. "Awesome."

"Thank you. I really appreciate it. You're too nice to me." I hung my head.

"Anything for my favorite girl! And only the best!" He beamed.

I could feel my stomach churning again. I think I'm going to be sick. I laid back down.

"You sure you're okay, babe?" He put his hand over my forehead, checking my temperature. "You really do just seem out of it." He bit his nails. He always did that when he was concerned or nervous.

"I think I'm fine." I reassured him.

"I hope so. Because this weekend is when we're heading down to the beach." He told me.

Oh yeah. I forgot about that.

"Oh, right." I mumbled.

"Do you want to go ahead and get your stuff from home for the week? I'm assuming you'll be staying the whole week?" He asked with a raised brow.

"Uh, sure. That would be great."

~

The next day, Niall and I went to school as usual. I wound up just sleeping in his bed last night, even though they offered me a very nice guest room.

I went about my school day as usual. When lunch rolled around, we all met up at our table. Harry has become a regular here too, and even Zayn was joining us now. He left me alone for the most part, which suited me fine. But honestly I didn't really mind having him around. Harry either. Harry was even starting to grow on me, dare I say it. He has been on his best behavior this whole time and he's actually a pretty normal guy. Zayn on the other hand, I can't really say. He hasn't given me much to go on.

I finished eating first, with plenty of time left. I was feeling like a little quiet time, and it was a zoo in here. So I decided to go for a little walk outside the school.

I was walking around the courtyard when I spotted a familiar figure leaning up against the giant oak tree. I smiled and made my way over.

"What are you doing out here, Lou?" I asked as I approached him.

He turned to look at me and a small smile appeared on his face. "I could ask you the same thing."

"Just thought I would get some fresh air." I answered, leaning against the tree beside him. We both looked out into the giant green courtyard.

"Mm." He nodded. "Same here." He sighed, sounding content.

"How are you?" I asked.

"I'm doing better. Still miss you though." He looked over at me. "What about you?"

I laughed ironically and threw my head back, looking up to the sky. "Not so well. I've managed to get myself into a mess. A big mess. And now I'm trying to get out of it without hurting anyone, but that doesn't seem to be an option." I told him, feeling at home with him. Even now, after all that happened between us, I could still open up to Louis.

He nodded and thought about it for a moment.

"Louis, can I ask you for some advice?" I squinted at the brightness of the sun and looked to him, awaiting his answer.

"Of course. Shoot." He told me, listening patiently.

"What do you do when you let the wrong emotions take over completely, and it rules your actions, which then gets you into a sticky situation with the person you love?"

"You mean like what I did?" He asked, looking at me with sorrow.

I stared at him for a long while. I felt horrible when he said that. I didn't realize he had felt like this before too. Over me, no less. I felt my heart sink again for the hundredth time today.

He finally looked away. "Well, there is nothing you can do but tell them, and hope they take it well. You have to have faith that the person who loves you will understand why you did what you did."

I could tell he was still talking about himself. It killed me to know I was so blind about it. I didn't even try to understand it from his side.

I was silent in my ever growing guilt.

He stared at me in wonder. "Are you okay? Really?" He seemed to notice that my mind was running wild. He could always tell.

"No. I'm not okay, Louis. ...I'm not." I looked down at my feet. "It's just, I've done something that will hurt someone that's very special to me. And I have to tell them, even though I don't want to because they'll probably be heartbroken, and that's the last thing I want. And no matter what I do, I'm going to wind up hurting two people that I love. I just don't want to hurt anyone else. But I don't seem to have such a good record at that. Why am I so fucking stupid?"

Louis laughed lightly at the last part. "You're not stupid, Eilana. You're a teenage girl. And they tend to make mistakes. Even really big ones. That's just part of life I'm afraid. Look, I don't know what you did, and I'm not asking you to tell me. But you have to tell this person whatever you did. Because it's the right thing to do, and they deserve to know." He told me.

"...But what if telling them means the end of our friendship? What if they don't understand me? Don't understand why I messed up? What then?"

"Then that's what happens. Things are going to happen in your life, things are going to change, some of them you won't like. But there's nothing you can do about it. Life isn't so simple that you can just take something back. I wish it was, but it's not." He looked up and shoved his hands in his pockets. "But, if they really love you, they'll understand." He smiled weakly at me.

I could feel that knife, slowly twisting, carving, destroying me from the inside out.

"That's not always true, Louis. Just because they don't understand, doesn't mean they don't truly love you." I told him, feeling hurt.

He smiled and looked down. "I hope everything goes well for you, and I hope you figure this out. I wish I could help more, but it's not my business. I wish you the best of luck with all of this."

"Thank you, Lou. And thanks for the advice. I would normally go to someone else, but I can't. Not this time. So, sorry for bothering you. Thanks for helping me." I smiled at him and gave him a hug.

"I'm always here for you, Eilana. I never left." He hugged me back.

I looked up at him. "Thank you. Really. Thank you so much. For everything."

"I'm glad I could help." He grinned off into the distance.

"I guess I'll be seeing you." I backed up slowly.

"Yeah, see you." He waved.

I waved back and made my way back inside.

He's right. Whatever the outcome, I have to deal with it.

~

I was laying on Niall's bed with a cup of tea, scrolling through twitter as I was waiting for him to get out of the shower. He and Harry and some other friends of theirs, played soccer together earlier, so he was washing off.

I decided. I was going to tell him. And if he kicks me out on the street, then he kicks me out on the street.

I heard the water shut off and I started getting more and more nervous about what I was about to do. I could hear him shuffling around his bathroom. Before I knew it, the door opened and he stepped out in a towel, dripping wet. He shot me a smile and walked to his closet to get dressed. My breathing became shallow and my eyes couldn't stay focused on one thing.

You can do this. You have to do this. Come on, now is the time.

"Niall I need to talk to you." I called to him.

He walked out putting his black T over his head. "Yeah? What about?" He came and stood in front of me.

"...Uh, um, well, I know you're not going to like hearing this, but I need to tell you." I started, trying to sound as confident as possible.

He raised his eyebrows at me, waiting for me to continue.

"Um, I kind of... well, Liam and I, we... kissed." I rubbed the back of my neck and looked down.

After he didn't say anything for a while, I looked up to see him staring at me blankly.

"You what?" He asked calmly.

"It didn't mean anything! I swear! It was just us being stupid and hormonal! I'm so sorry! I'm so sorry! I wish I could take it back! I ju-"

"You kissed Liam? When?" He seemed gone. Like he wasn't really registering what he was hearing.

"...The other night when I went to hang out with him." I confessed.

He still just stood there, not really responding.

"Niall?"

"How many times?"

"Niall I told you it didn't mea-"

"How many times did you kiss him?!" He raised his voice. Something he has never done to me before. It was frightening. I didn't like this side of Niall. But it's my fault and now I have to deal with it.

"...Just twice that night, and I don't know, maybe two or three times the day after..." I hung my head, feeling worthless. I am worthless.

"Why?" He asked quietly.

"I don't know. It was just hormones and physical attraction. It was stupidity and I'm sorry! I know sorry isn't enough, I know it doesn't make it okay. I don't expect you to forgive me."

He looked at me in silence, seemingly dumbfounded at what he was hearing. "Do you like him?"

"No! No, Niall. I like you. I know that's hard to believe right now, but please believe me! I promise he doesn't mean anything to me like that. That's why I chose you." I pleaded. I don't even know why. I shouldn't be forgiven for such a sin.

He laughed to himself. "I believe you. I just don't understand how this happened. I trusted you. I can't believe this. I really cannot believe this! This is crazy! I never thought I would hear something so horrible come out of your mouth! I-I don't even know how to react!" He threw his arms up.

"I'm so sorry, Niall. I can't say it enough. You don't know how terrible I feel about it. I am so, so sorry." I rubbed my forehead, getting a headache.

"Hah! Are you serious? Is this a joke?!" He asked. His face was red and his knuckles were white.

"I wish it was, Niall. I really do. More than anything." I spoke quietly.

His brow furrowed and he looked confused. "I don't understand. Am I not good enough? Is there something I'm not doing right? I've been trying to give you everything you could want, but am I missing something? I don't get it. I'm lost. I thought you were happy with me?" His voice was cracking, and his eyes were watering.

I couldn't bear to see him like this. I could practically hear the sound of my heart shattering. I can only imagine what state his is in right now.

"No, Niall. You have been perfect. It's not your fault in any way. It's all me." I assured him.

"And Liam? How did he react to this?"

"...Well, truthfully, Liam kissed me, but I-"

"That bastard!!" Niall roared so loud that I flinched.

"But it was still my fault! Niall, don't blame him! Please! He feels bad about it too!" I tried to get him to hear me out, but he was pacing the room, knocking things onto the floor, breaking things, and cursing under his breath.

"Niall! Please listen to me!" I tried to get his attention again.

He stormed up to me and grabbed me by the arms. "What the hell, Eilana?! And you let him?! You didn't even try to fight it?!" He yelled, shaking me.

"I'm sorry! But I-"

"Did you like it?! Huh?! Did you?!" He yelled in my face.

"Niall you're scaring me!" I squeezed my eyes shut and turned my face away.

"Answer me!!" He grabbed my face.

"Yes! Okay?! Yes! But I promise I'm done with that! I won't do it again!"

"Damn right you won't do it again!" He let go of me, pushing me away. He paced the room again, stopping in front of a wall and throwing a punch into it. I stared at the giant hole in his wall now. My eyes trailed down to his hand. It was bleeding.

"Niall, you're bleedi-"

"I know!!" He yelled again, making his way towards me. His hand came up quickly and I tensed up and prepared for the hit that was coming.

But it never happened. I opened my eyes to see Niall staring at me, looking more hurt than ever. His mouth was hanging open and his eyes were wide.

"Did you think I was going to hit you?" His voice came out weak and unsteady.

I just stared back at him, not being able to form the words I was looking for.

He wrapped his arms around me and buried his face into my neck. He broke down and started to cry, he was shaking. "I would never, never hit you. I can't believe you thought I would hit you. I would take my own life before I would do that! That breaks my heart! You know I could never do that to you! I don't care what you've done! I promise I will never raise my hand to you. I promise." He stroked my hair lovingly and held me to him tightly.

"I'm sorry. I'm so sorry! I can't do anything but hurt you!" I started to cry.

"I know you played a part in this, but it sounds to me like it was mostly Liam's fault. So I'm going to take this up with him." He held my face gently and looked me in the eye, trying to calm me down. "I'm sorry I scared you.

"Niall please don't be mad at Liam! It's really my fault! Please!" I started to panic at the thought of what he might do to Liam.

"But it's his damn fault! I'm going to go over there right now and settle this! I can't believe he would drag you into something like this!! That is not okay! And he's going to find out the hard way not to mess with my girl!" He grabbed his jacket and threw it on before he stormed out of his room.

I followed after him, trying to stop him. "Niall please don't do this!! I'm begging you! Please! I'm the one you should be angry with! Not Liam!"

He stopped in his tracks and whipped around. "Oh, I am angry with you, darlin'. But I'm more angry with Liam. He could have prevented this, and he didn't! He started it! And now I'm going to finish it!" He started for the front door again.

I grabbed his jacket sleeve and tried pulling at him to slow him down, but it didn't do anything. Not a thing. "Niall stop! Please! Hit me instead! I deserve it!" I pleaded.

He turned back to me again, hand on the doorknob. "Don't you ever even mention me abusing you in any way! That is beyond insulting and you don't know how angry it makes me!"

I dropped to the floor, defeated and tired of this already. "Please, don't do this." I begged one last time.

He looked down at me, his narrowed blue eyes piercing into me. "Stay here and wait for me! Don't you dare leave this house! We're going to talk when I get back!"

"Niall!" I called out, but it was too late. He was already out the door, heading towards Liam. I didn't even want to think about it. It made me more sick. Now Liam is going to get hurt too because of me. Both mentally and physically.

This did not go at all like I thought it would. But then again, when does anything go the way I thought it would? I just hope they're okay. The both of them. If either of them got seriously injured because of this, I don't think I could live with myself.

Why am I so horrible at everything? I can't do one thing right. Not one. I am the most worthless person ever. Everything I touch, breaks...

Chapter Text

Liam's P.O.V

Tick. Tick. Tick. Tick.

The sound of the clock on the wall was the only thing to be heard as I lay here on the cold floor of my home. All alone. Again. Nothing out of the ordinary.

I don't know how long I've been here. I rolled my head to the side, seeing all the broken vases and all the tipped over furniture. Mum and dad wouldn't be too happy about that. I thought back to earlier today, when I got home. Eilana had sent me a text telling me she was going to do it.

I was home alone as usual. So I started breaking things, everything in sight that was breakable. The vases, the lamps, the flower pots, even the mirrors. All while managing to flip every piece of furniture I could lift. Which happened to be most of it. This house was a wreck. But I didn't care. I didn't care that my parents would be outraged when they got home. They were always mad at me anyway. What's one more time? I finally laid down in the middle of it when my anger was gone, and I haven't moved since.

She was going to tell him. And my emotions, I wasn't sure what they were anymore. I was happy that she was doing the right thing. I didn't want to hurt Niall any more than we were already going to. He has to find out eventually. But at the same time, in those few words, she had rejected me. And my heart broke again. This was such an unfortunate situation. And it's all my fault.

The one time I decided to be rebellious. The one time I decided to go with my gut feeling and against my thoughts. And look where that got me.

I don't think I've ever felt this bad before. I know I haven't. I have never done such a thing. I wouldn't ever do such a thing. But because of her, I have. And I've never been so ashamed. She had to be so perfect to me. She has ruined me, and I still love her.

In one swift mistake, I've managed to ruin my two best friends lives. Who knows how this will affect Eilana and Niall's relationship. And poor, poor Niall. I can't say sorry enough to him. Knowing him, I wouldn't be surprised if he showed up any moment, ready to fight. That's the Niall I know anyway. Niall and I, we've been friends since we met in middle school. First day, we were friends. We just clicked. And I've never known a better man. He doesn't deserve this at all.

What have I done? What have I done? Why am I such a fuck up? I can't do anything. I can't make anyone happy. Not even my parents. I'm such a failure. I've done nothing but try my hardest at everything in life, and I'm still not good enough. I never will be.

I thought for once, I would just do something different. Maybe I would find what would make me happy, but all it did was cause problems for everyone. I didn't care that I was in deep shit for it, but my friends, that was what made me feel horrible. I kind of just wish someone would break in right now and shoot me in the head. That would fix the problem.

Looks like I'm back to this again. I haven't been this deep into depression for a long time. But it's back. It always comes back doesn't it? It's the only thing I can really depend on always being there. But I don't feel sorry for myself. I deserve it. I deserve worse. Dying would be too easy.

But, maybe it is the answer. Mum and dad would probably be happy, Nicola and Ruth wouldn't care. Obviously they wouldn't. Why would they go on a holiday without me like this? Because they want to pretend I'm not a part of this family. They won't accept that such a shit excuse for a human is part of their perfect little happy family. I feel sorry for them. I wouldn't want me either.

I wonder what it's like? To have parents who love you, who are proud of everything you do, who love you no matter what. What is it like to make them smile? To have them introduce you to people with a prideful smile, saying proudly that's their child? I bet it's a wonderful feeling.

I sighed and kept staring at the ceiling.

I can't believe I've done this. I can't believe it. And I can't take it back. That's the worst part. I'm more than happy to apologize, but he'll still be hurt. I would rather just go back and not do it. This is terrible. This is horrible. I wish this knife I'm feeling was real. It would be so much better that way.

I closed my eyes and imagined what it would be like. To hear nothing, see nothing. To not worry about anything ever again. To be happy and peaceful for eternity. It was tempting.

I was interrupted by the sound of a pounding on the front door. I already knew who it was. I sighed again and got up slowly, making my way to the door. I reached out for the doorknob and saw the dried blood all over my hand. I opened the door and there stood Niall. Just like I expected.

I stared blankly at him.

"You fucking bastard!" He yelled as he stepped in and threw a punch right into my face. He wasn't wasting any time to hear what I had to say. All the same, as I had nothing to say anyway. Only that I was sorry.

He punched me again, this time in the jaw. And then again in the mouth. The coppery taste coming to me now. I just stood there, taking them. I was enjoying it in a weird way. I was finally getting what I deserved.

He punched me in the stomach, making me double over. He kneed me in the face and I could feel the blood coming from my nose.

"Aren't you going to fight back?! Huh?! Since you're such a damn rebel now!" He yelled.

I looked up at him. I had no expression on my face. He didn't even realize he was beating on one who was already dead.

He pushed me over and got on me, punching me again. And again. Again. Again.

Niall and I have gotten into fights a couple of times before. Over little trivial things. We were both boxers so we enjoyed a good fight. It wasn't a big deal to us. But never anything like this.

He finally stopped and looked at me with confusion. "What is wrong with you?! Fight back! Aren't you going to defend your actions and tell me it was her fault?!"

"No. It was my fault, and I'm sorry. I don't know how to get across to you how sorry I am. I was completely wrong. I'm so sorry my friend." I could barely see him through my tear filled eyes. Everything was tinted red from the blood that was leaking into them.

He kept looking at me confused. He laughed sarcastically and shook his head. He got up and rubbed the back of his hand against his face, smearing my blood on it. He looked at me one more time before turning and walking out, slamming the door behind him.

I continued to lay here, thinking blank thoughts.

That was it? That was all? He should have practically killed me. I hope Eilana is okay. I know he would never hurt her, but she's probably scared of this side of him. I just hope they work it out.

Eilana's P.O.V

I laid on Niall's bed, breathing in his scent and remembering when everything was just perfect between us. I wanted to go back to that. I would give anything. This is such a mess. I should have never gotten involved with Niall. I should have known I would cause him nothing but pain and trouble.

I miss the simple days, when it was just Louis and I. I didn't have to worry about hurting all these different people. Just Louis. I could at least manage that. At least for a while. I hope he really is doing okay. I miss him. I really miss him. I could have avoided all of this, had I just not been so stupid and stayed by Louis side. He was right, I shouldn't have been lying to him. He deserved to know.

I used to never lie. But now it seems I've made a habit of it, and it really doesn't do anything but cause trouble. It always winds up hurting people in the end.

I heard the door open and I sat up quickly. Niall came through the door. I was horrified at the sight. He had blood all over his knuckles and his face. He looked calmer now at least.

He walked straight to his bathroom and I watched him as he turned on the sink and washed off. He walked back out and changed his shirt, throwing the blood stained one away. He sighed and rubbed his face. He walked over to the bed and sat down.

He looked at me and I looked back from under my lashes. "Don't worry, Liam is okay. Nothing he hasn't had before." He told me.

"Are you okay?" I asked quietly.

"No. I'm hurt, Eilana. I love you and I don't know what to do." He confessed.

"I'm sorry." I teared up again.

"Please don't cry. Please." He patted the spot next to him and I crawled over and sat next to him. He put his arm around me and pulled me into a hug.

"I'm so confused." He said.

"About what?"

"Normally I wouldn't tolerate this from a girl. I wouldn't give it a second thought. I would throw them out without looking back once."

"...Are you going to throw me out?"

"No. That's what I mean. I can't do that to you. I love you too much. Even after this, I still love you and I could never do that to you. I wouldn't think of it. Even if I wanted to, I don't think I could let you go." He stared at my face. I could tell he was thinking hard about something.

"But you should. I've been terrible to you. You deserve better, Niall."

"I don't think so. I love you for a reason. You are my princess. I just know you are. I can feel it. But I know you're still unsure about me. I'm willing to wait, but I'm not going to make you stay with me if you don't want to. If you would rather be with someone else, if I don't make you happy, please tell me. I just want you to be happy." He brushed my face with his fingers.

"No, Niall. I want to be with you. This has made me realize that it is you I love. I only wish it didn't take this to make me realize it." I dropped my gaze to the floor.

He grabbed my face gently in his hands and looked at me. "Then can we try again? Let's just start over. Pretend this never happened and try to work it out. I love you Eilana, and I want to be with you."

I looked him in the eyes and smiled slightly. "Are you sure?"

"Positively, absolutely, totally sure." He smiled back sweetly.

"I love you too, Niall." I smiled and felt a tear run down my cheek.

He smiled and wiped it away. "It's not going to be easy, but I will give my everything if it means I can stay beside you." He kissed me sweetly and I kissed back.

"I'm so sorry, Niall." I just had to tell him one more time.

"You are forgiven. I'll be honest, it will take some time for my heart to heal, but I still love you and I forgive you. It isn't easy, but I'll be okay." He hugged me to his chest.

"I really, really love you El."

I smiled and hugged him tighter. "I love you too."

I'm so happy to be able to finally say it back.

~

I thought everything was going to be alright, but then another problem arose. It has been three days since Niall and I have decided to work it out, but now Liam was nowhere to be found. He wasn't even showing up to school. No one had seen him for three days. No one had even heard from him. We knew his parents and his sibling were on holiday without him, so asking them was useless. I had a bad feeling about it. Even Niall said he was worried about him. People had gone to his house, but no one answered. We couldn't even tell if he was home or not.

I was so worried about him. I just hope he's okay. I don't know where he could have gone to, but I hope he'll come back.

Chapter Text

"Do you think he's okay?" I asked them as we were gathered around the lunch table.

It was Friday and no one had seen Liam since Monday. We were all getting increasingly worried as the days passed.

"I honestly don't know." Harry answered as he munched on his apple.

"I can almost bet you that he's in danger though." Niall commented, looking spaced out.

"What kind of danger?" Zayn asked, leaning forward.

We all looked to Niall in interest and worry.

"Well, let's just say he hasn't had a great past with being home alone for long periods of time. He starts to think things he shouldn't when he's left alone too long. Especially when he thinks he's done something wrong." He explained.

Harry and Zayn furrowed their brows. "What do you mean? Did he do something wrong?" Harry asked.

We haven't told them at all about what has happened between the three of us. They're clueless, and we intend to keep it that way. Niall and I decided it would be best. This was between the three of us anyway. It's personal. And of course I appreciated it because now they wouldn't think of me as a cheating bitch. Even though I was.

"Uhh..." I started, but then nothing came out.

"He thinks he has. He always thinks he's done something wrong. You can thank his shit excuse for parents for that." Niall rolled his eyes at no one.

Niall was closer to Liam than anyone else in the group. He's known Liam much longer than we've known him.

"I've never met his parents." I commented, thinking about what they could be like. Apparently they were horrible.

Now that he mentions it, Liam hasn't ever really mentioned his parents to me. Even when I would talk about mine, he didn't have one thing to say about his. I always thought it strange. Liam just seemed like one of those sons who would be close to his parents because he was such an accomplished guy. He was practically a genius anyway. What parent wouldn't be proud of that?

"Well, they'll put on a show for you, but behind closed doors they're terrible to him. They've ignore him most of his life, and when they do acknowledge him, they're telling him what a fuck up he is and how he'll never be good enough. Meanwhile, his sisters do absolutely nothing and they're spoiled rotten. I guess it's just because Liam is the youngest and the only boy, so he's expected to be perfect. Even though he does everything in his power to be, and they still don't appreciate him." He told us.

I stared at him wide eyed. I was shocked. Liam always seemed so happy. "Did you guys know about this?" I asked the other two.

"Yeah, sadly we know what he goes through." Harry answered.

Zayn shook his head, agreeing with Harry.

"That's terrible!" I felt so bad for him know. He doesn't deserve that.

"Well, how do we even know that he's home for sure?" Harry asked, referring to Niall's earlier assumption.

"Trust me, he is. I know Liam. He wouldn't go anywhere. Not when he's like this." He stated confidently.

"I went by his house yesterday, but he didn't answer if he was there. I stood there knocking and ringing the doorbell for a solid twenty minutes. I even kept yelling for him to let me in, but nothing. There was no sign of life there." Harry said.

My breath hitched when he said there was no sign of life. "You don't think..." I looked at Niall worriedly with tears welling up in my eyes.

His eyes widened and he pulled me into a hug. "No, no! He's probably fine, El. Don't worry." He cradled me and shot Harry a warning look.

Harry's eyes widened and his hands shot up in the air defensively, mouthing a sorry in our direction.

"Look, I'll go check on him again after school." Harry said finally, breaking the hard silence at our table.

We all shook our heads at him that it was a good idea. He sucked in a big breath and let it go slowly. "I just hope I'm not too late..." He mumbled under his breath.

~

Harry's P.O.V

I parked my car on the side of the road and walked up to the giant black gate. It was passcode protected.

Shit. I forgot about that.

I looked up and examined it. About fifteen feet tall. Easy enough. I found a place on the black iron for my foot and I slowly started climbing the gate. Pretty soon I had made it over. I jumped down from the top, landing on one knee at the impact. But I remained unscathed.

I made my way up the driveway and to the door. I knew it was locked, but I still jiggled the doorknob anyway.

Locked. Well, what did I expect?

I rang the doorbell, knowing I wouldn't get any response. I stood there for a minute, waiting, hoping for any kind of sign that he was okay.

I knew he didn't have a very good home life, but I had no idea that he could be a danger to himself. He always seemed like none of it bothered him. But I was wrong. And now I'm really worried. The longer I stand out here, the more I believe that he isn't coming to this door.

I started banging on the door and yelling. Probably startling some of the neighbors, but I don't care. I just want to know that my best friend is okay.

When I still wasn't getting an answer, I started to walk around the outside of the house. I looked for some sign of his car, but the windows to the garage were too dark. I couldn't make anything out. I walked back to the front door and started to kick it repeatedly. It was sturdy, but I could feel it starting to give under my strength.

Finally with one last kick, the door flew open and I took a big breath, nervous of what I was going to find.

I made my way through the house, looking through every room. He wasn't anywhere on the first floor though. I climbed the stairs, my pace getting faster the closer I got to the top. By the time I was on the second floor I was rushing around, busting doors open and searching frantically. With the number of rooms left unsearched getting smaller and smaller, I was breaking a sweat at the thought that he might not be here at all.

I kept making it down the hall, until I came to his room. I stopped for a second, trying to calm my breathing. I leaned closer to the door. "Liam? Mate? Buddy?" I asked loudly.

No response.

I put my ear to the door. I couldn't hear a thing. I kicked it in to find it empty.

I walked in and looked around worriedly. My eyes landed on the open bathroom door, and just through it, on the side of the bathtub, sat a very sad, defeated looking Liam. He was looking down at his hands. If he had even noticed me, he wasn't acknowledging me. I saw that he was holding something.

A bottle of pills.

I ran at him and slapped it out of his hands. "What the hell are you doing?!" I yelled at him.

He looked up at me with dead eyes. "Harry." He muttered.

"What is wrong with you?! Are you crazy?! What were you going to do with those things?!" I gestured towards the bottle laying on the ground.

He looked at it and then dropped his gaze to the floor in front of him. "What do you think?" He said ashamedly.

"I can't believe this! This is ridiculous! Whatever you think you did that is so bad, is not this bad! Nothing is! How dare you be so selfish!! You have all these people that love you and care for you, and you were just going to let them suffer?! Just because you don't want to be sad anymore?! Do you realize how selfish that is?! Do you know how we would feel if you had gone through with it?! How I would feel?" My vision blurred as my eyes became tear filled. I dropped to my knees and hugged him.

"You are so stupid, Liam! You're a fucking wanker for considering that!" I cried.

The thought of losing one of my best friends was too much. Especially when we're so young. The thought has never crossed my mind. That one of us could disappear forever. At any second my friend could be gone forever. And it almost happened.

I was too hurt to feel any shame for crying into his shoulder. He's my brother and I can't stand the thought.

"I'm sorry." He hugged me back slowly.

I pulled back and stood up, washing my face off in the sink. I dried off and turned to him. "What the hell, mate? Seriously. Do you want to tell me why you're doing this?" I leaned against the counter, waiting for his explanation.

He sighed and rubbed his face up and down. "I did something horrible Harry. I ruined people’s lives. People I love and care about, and now they probably hate me. Along with all the other people that hate me as well. I just keep screwing up people's lives and I'm not making anyone happy. I'm a failure anyway. I might as well remove myself."

I furrowed my eyebrows at his words. I was confused. "What do you mean? What did you do?"

"I would rather not say. It's just bad, okay? I feel horrible." He said, leaning his head against the wall.

I sighed in sadness for my friend. "I'm not going to pry. If you don't want to tell me, that's fine. But I don't have to know what you did to know that it's not as bad as you think."

"But that's just it, Harry. You don't know what I've done."

"I don't know. You're right. But I don't care, Liam. You're my best friend. Look, we're all worried about you. Please just stop this ridiculous way of thinking and come be social and happy? We all miss you." I told him honestly.

He scoffed and looked down again. "That's a lie and you know it. You, maybe. But I'm not so sure that the others miss me."

"What are you talking about? Eilana cried at lunch today because she was worried that you might be dead! And Niall has been asking me and Zayn to do everything we can to find you every day while he stays to comfort Eilana because she's so damn worried about you! Even though Niall won't let on how much he's worried about you too, we can all see it. He's constantly spaced out. We were all worried about you, Liam. And we all miss you. Please, please stop this." I pleaded with him.

He looked up at me and I could tell something had clicked with him. His eyes were coming to life again. "Eilana." He cracked an ever so slight smile. "Niall still cares about me?" He asked.

I looked at him confused. "Of course he does! Why would he stop caring?" I asked stupidly.

He just remained quiet and stared at me.

"...Oh. This whole thing that you did, it had something to do with Niall, didn't it?" I asked knowingly.

He nodded and looked around.

"Right. Well, I can assure you it hasn't really affected your friendship very much. He still loves you and thinks of you as a brother." I told him.

He was quiet in thought for a minute. He nodded his head again and stood up. "I just don't know what to say to Niall."

"I wish I could tell you, mate. I really wish I could help you, but I'm not going to go sticking my nose where it doesn't belong. All I can say is, I think you should talk to Niall. I know you two, you'll get over it. Whatever it is, it will pass. Because I've never seen two closer brothers." I smiled at him faintly.

He returned the smile and patted me on the back. "Thanks, mate. You've really helped me. I owe you big time."

"Don't worry about it. I'm more than happy to help you out. Always. I love you, alright?" I pulled him into another hug.

"I love you too, man." He hugged me back and we chuckled lightly.

~

Niall's P.O.V

Riiiing. Riiiing. Riiiing.

I tried to calm my nerves as I waited for Harry to pick up the phone. I wanted to know the news with Liam. I'm just praying it's good news.

Hey mate, what's up?

“Where are you? Is he okay?”

He's fine. Details later, but he's fine. I'm sitting here chatting to him right now. We're just having a laugh.

“Oh. Well, that's great. I guess I'll talk to you later then.”

Alright. Bye.

Then the line went dead, but I kept holding the phone to my ear.

He's alright. He's okay. Thank god! I was almost sure he was going to do something stupid.

Sure I was mad at him for what he did. But he's like my brother and we're too close for me to let something like that get in the way of our friendship. He's only human. He makes mistakes. Everyone can't be strong all the time. We all crack every now and again. Hell, if I was in his position it would have been hard for me not to too. I mean, it's Eilana we're talking about.

I wasn't even mad at Eilana anymore. Just hurt. But I'm healing. I can tell she's really trying to make it up to me, even though it's not necessary. But hey, I'm enjoying it.

I breathed a sigh of relief just as Eilana walked into the room.

"You okay, babe?" She asked as she walked over and sat on the bed next to me.

"Yeah, I'm just fine." I smiled at her and pecked her on the lips. "I just got off the phone with Harry." I told her.

She climbed behind me on her knees and put her hands on my shoulders, softly massaging them. "Oh? What did he say?" She asked quickly.

"He said that he's just fine and that he was having a chat with him. I guess he talked him out of that depression he was in." I closed my eyes as her thumbs dug deeper into my muscles.

"That's great. So you're not too worried anymore, right?" I could feel the smile on her lips as she pressed them against the back of my neck. It sent chills up my spine. After all this time, and her touch still made my body go wild.

"I guess. I just still feel a little tense." I mumbled out, hanging my head forward.

She trailed kisses around my neck and to my ear. "Good. Because I'm going to help you relax." She purred.

I almost groaned just at the sound of her voice. She had such an effect on me. She pushed me down on the bed and crawled over me. She stared at me with a smirk and a lustful twinkle in her eye.

"Holy shit, El." I couldn't control my breathing at the sight of her straddling me. I was so turned on I was starting to sweat. I've never seen her like this.

She leaned down and pressed her lips to mine. I grabbed her face and deepened the kiss, tangling my fingers in her soft hair. God, she was so perfect. I felt her hands grab hold of my hair and she tugged at it gently, making me moan. I loved it when she did that.

"I love you baby." I mumbled between kisses. She smiled and tugged my hair again, harder this time, making me groan lowly. She slowly started to rub her hips against mine, earning more groans and growls from me. I grabbed her hips and flipped us over, so now I was on top of her. I smirked and continued to grind on her. She whimpered at the friction and looked up at me innocently, driving me mad. I loved how innocent she was. There was something sexy about it.

Right when I least expected it, she flipped me back over. I was shocked again and stared up at her in wonder. "Nuh uh. I'm the one who's doing the work this time, baby." She smirked at me and continued to rub me through my jeans. I could feel myself getting hard. I mentally cursed to myself.

"El-" I started but the words wouldn't come out. I was having a hard time making out words. She grabbed my hands and placed them over her chest, encouraging me to fondle her. I grabbed them without hesitation and started to massage them, earning moans from her. Hearing her make those noises was only making me harder. I had to stop this or else I was going to be stuck with an erection. "El, baby-" I tried again.

She barely opened her tight shut eyes and looked down at me. "Hm?"

"We have to stop." I told her.

"How come?" She asked, pouting slightly.

"Because you're going to leave me with a hard on." I stated simply.

Her eyes snapped open and she giggled, getting off of me. She looked down to my jeans to see that she had, indeed, given me one. "Sorry." She kept giggling.

I grunted and sat up, wiping my forehead. "I'm uh, I'm going to go take care of this. I'll be right back." I told her as I walked to the bathroom.

I could still hear her giggling behind me. "It's so big though!" She got out through her laughs.

I smiled and rolled my eyes. "You have no idea." I joked and winked at her before closing the door.

Chapter Text

"Hey! I like that song!" I pouted as Harry skipped over Sexy Can I by Ray J.

"Well too bad!" He stuck his tongue out at me through the rear view mirror.

We were all headed to the beach for the weekend. A bunch of the popular people from school were having a nighttime bonfire party. Why someone would throw a beach party in the middle of November, I have no idea. But we decided we could all use some fun after all the shit that had gone down.

Niall and Liam had a talk last night. They sorted everything out and they were cool again. Sure it was still a little awkward, but that would pass. They seemed to be fine now, making jokes and such like always. It made me smile. I'm just happy that I didn't totally screw everything up.

So now we were all in Harry's black Range Rover, heading towards the beach. Harry was driving, obviously, and Zayn was in the front seat, while me, Niall, and Liam were sitting in the back in that order.

We were blasting music and making jokes the whole way there. Everything seemed to be fine again. There was no tension in the air and everyone was smiling. Even Zayn.

"Are we there yet?" Niall joked like a kid.

"No." Harry answered back irritated.

"How about now?" He asked immediately.

"No, Niall." He shot him a playful glare through the mirror.

"...And now? Are we any closer?" He started laughing.

"No!" Harry laughed.

"Now?" Zayn started too.

"What about now?" Liam chimed in. They were all cheekily grinning.

"Yeah, Harry. What about now?" I joined in.

"No! We are not any closer! And if you all don't shut up, I'm going to turn this car around and we're going to go back home!" He joked, pretending to be a dad.

We all stayed really quiet.

"That's what I thought." He said.

"You're not my real dad!" Liam shouted.

"Actually I am." Harry laughed.

Liam gasped in pretend shock. "My mother would never!" He feigned hurt.

Harry just laughed harder and we all joined him.

"You guys are so stupid." I told them, shaking my head.

"You love it." Niall winked and kissed me.

Suddenly Clique by Kanye West came on. "Dis mah jam!" I yelled and started to dance in my seat like a mad woman. They all laughed at me being silly and I started to sing along, imitating a rapper. Pretty soon the whole car was doing it. We all burst out laughing at our stupidity when the next song came on.

~

I woke up to Niall whispering in my ear. "We're here princess. Come on." He picked me up and carried me out of the car.

He put me down and got my bag and his out of the car. "Follow me." He said as he started to walk towards a giant white beach house.

I looked around. It was almost all white with shades of gray and soft blues. The flooring throughout was white wood and the walls were a light blue color and everything in here was white. It was giant and very open. Most of the walls were just windows and you could see the beach through them. It was set right on the beach. But on a part that no one else was at. It was totally clear of people except the few teenagers from school who had already gotten here.

"Woah. It's so pretty." I said, admiring it.

"Thanks. It's my family's." Harry said as he emerged from the kitchen area.

"It's beautiful. And very... big." I stated.

He laughed a little and went back out to help everyone carry the rest of their things in.

After we all got settled in, we headed out for dinner. Harry took us to some super expensive steak house. He said it was really good and his family always ate here when they came here.

We were all sat around the table, being way too loud like always. But our waiter was really pretty and it made me feel self-conscious. Niall noticed and squeezed my thigh under the table. He smiled over at me and leaned towards me, whispering in my ear.

"I only have eyes for you, princess. And besides, she's got nothing on you." He kissed me on the cheek, making me smile and blush lightly.

"What's going on over there you two?" Harry's voice boomed across the table at us.

We both looked at him and he stared back, raising his brow and crossing his arms. "No inappropriate touching under the table!" He joked, smirking.

"None of your business!" Niall smiled cheekily.

"I encourage it." Zayn smirked from the other end of the table.

"Of course you do." I joked under my breath.

He shot me a suggestive smile and winked. I rolled my eyes and laughed.

"Ey! That's my lady, mate." Niall shot a look at Zayn. Even though he knew he was only joking.

When the waitress came back, she wouldn't stop flirting with all of the guys. And I mean all of them. Although Zayn was the only one who acknowledged her actions and gave them back. I just shook my head and rolled my eyes at their flirting. This is ridiculous.

I saw her slip him a piece of paper and I laughed to myself. She has no idea.

After dinner it was already dark so we headed back to the beach to join the party that was already in full swing.

They had the giant bonfire in the middle and seats around it, along with a million coolers of beer and other alcohols. It was weird though, we were all on the beach but everyone was wearing jackets, boots, and scarves.

I didn't dress too warmly though, seeing as I liked the cold. I was wearing my light pink skinnies and my black Toms with a white T and a black hoodie. My hair was up in a perfect bun and I had a gray scarf around my neck. I was wearing the necklace that Louis had got me under it. I still wore it. I never stopped. It makes me feel like I'm still close to him in a way.

Niall put his arm around my waist as we walked to the campfire to get drinks. Niall grabbed a beer and I grabbed a soda. We sat down with the rest of our group around the fire. The moon was full and it was actually a pretty bright night. Someone's jeep was parked on the beach and they had all the doors and the trunk open with loud music pumping out of it. Someone else was setting off fireworks in the distance. It was actually pretty cool out here.

After a while, Niall asked me to dance. So he lead me out to where the other people were gathered dancing. He put his hand on my hip as we danced and held his beer with the other. We swayed in sync for a while, bumping and grinding like everyone else. After some time I got tired and told him I needed to take a break so we headed back to the campfire and I noticed Liam wasn't anywhere to be found.

I looked around a spotted a figure sitting down in the sand alone, closer to the ocean a ways away. I walked over stopped behind him. "Do you mind if I sit here?" I asked.

He looked back at me and smiled faintly. "Not at all." He responded.

I sat down next to him and looked out at the moon reflecting on the water. It really was beautiful out here.

"So what are you doing over here by yourself?" I asked him.

"Just thinking about stuff. How come you're not over there with them?" He asked back.

"I've had enough of that for a while." I laughed.

He shook his head and it fell into a comfortable silence for a while.

"So you and Niall are doing alright?" He asked suddenly.

I smiled lightly. "Yeah, we're fine. Don't worry."

"I'm really sorry. I shouldn't have taken it that far. I shouldn't have done it in the first place."

"Well, what happened, happened. All has been forgiven and time will pass and we'll forget about it. Stop beating yourself up about it." I told him.

He nodded in silence and played with the sand around him. "So I guess that's the end for us romantically." He chuckled.

"Well, I'm happy with Niall right now. But who knows what the future holds. It's not certain that we'll be together forever, so maybe it's not."

He looked over at me, a thoughtful look on his face. "Wrong setting, wrong time." He stated.

"Exactly. I'll be honest, I'm attracted to you, but I don't see you as anything more than a friend right now. But that's not to say that I won't like you in the future. Who knows?" I thought aloud.

"I can handle it. Don't worry. I'll be honest with you as well, I still like you, but I really just want you to be happy. And if you like Niall, I want you to be with Niall. But you're right, we don't know the future. And so I'll wait." He continued to look out on the ocean.

I smiled and it fell quiet between us. I leaned over and hugged him sweetly. "Thank you Liam. You're a good friend. Despite what you think." I told him and kissed him on the cheek.

He smiled and we stood up, dusting the sand off of our clothes, and walked back to the party. We were greeted back by Niall. "There you two are!" He smiled and pulled me onto his lap, stealing a kiss.

I giggled at his cuteness and smiled back. "We were just having a chat." I told him.

He nodded his head in approval and joined back into the conversation Harry and Zayn were having.

I was looking around at the people to see a lot of familiar faces, although I hated them all. But then I saw one that made me smile. I told Niall I would be right back and I got up, making my way over to him.

"Hey Lou." I tapped him on the shoulder.

He turned around and smiled. "Hey! I didn't know you were here." He smiled brighter.

"Yep. I'm here with the guys." I told him, gesturing to the group of familiar boys sitting near the fire.

He nodded. "Hey um, I was about to go for a walk. Want to join me?" He asked timidly.

"Sure." I smiled sweetly at him. I was more than happy to spend time with Louis again.

We walked down the beach slowly along the wet sand. I stopped and rolled my jeans up after a while and took my shoes off. I didn't want to get them wet. Louis did the same.

"So you and Niall, huh?" He asked, a smirk on his lips.

"Yeah." I laughed.

"Is he good to you?" He looked at me and I could see the moon light reflecting in his eyes, making them almost neon blue.

"Yes. He's wonderful to me. He's very sweet, and he doesn't rush me into things. He's everything I've wanted in a boyfriend." I told him, smiling to myself.

"That's great. I'm really happy for you. Really." He smiled at me.

"Thanks."

"So what's happened in your life since I've been out of the loop?" He chuckled.

"Not much interesting I don't think." I honestly couldn't think of anything. Anything I would tell him anyway.

"I've noticed Harry and Zayn have been sitting with you at lunch, and you all seem to get on pretty well. What happened there?" He asked, clearly interested.

"Oh, right. Well, I know it's weird but, Harry actually apologized to me a while ago. He was sincere about it and he said he didn't want to bully me anymore. In fact, he told me he wanted to be friends. I thought it was weird, but I gave him a chance. He's proven himself to be pretty cool actually. He's really not such a bad guy, you know."

He looked at me with a weird face.

"What? He really isn't!" I laughed at him.

"Hm. Well that's good I guess. So you haven't been having any trouble with being bullied then?"

"Nope. They're pretty protective of me."

"I noticed." He joked, recalling the last party we went to.

"Sorry about that." I laughed lightly.

He shrugged and made a cute face. "No big deal, really." He shoved his hands in his pockets and smiled. "So you've been happy, then?"

"Yes, I have. For the most part anyway. And you? What's up with you?"

He laughed and rubbed the back of his neck. "Well, nothing new really. Just doing what I usually do. You know, school, partying, eating, sleeping. The boring old life of me since you left it." He pouted playfully.

"Heyyy." I nudged his shoulder with mine. "I miss you too you know."

He stopped and looked at me, his smile falling into a more serious expression. "Do you really?"

"Of course, Louis. You were my entire life before all of this. I couldn't ever forget about you." I smiled up at him.

He gave me warm toothy grin. "You have no idea how happy it makes me to hear that."

He turned around and began walking again.

"Louis, I've been thinking." I started after some time of silence.

"Hm?" He looked at me with a raised eyebrow.

"Why can't we be friends again? What's stopping us? We obviously get along now. And this whole distance thing that was my fault, is stupid. I just want to be friends again." I told him honestly.

He grinned to himself, looking down at his feet. "You're right. I don't know what's getting in the way of us being friends anymore, besides our own misunderstood feeling towards each other. But that seems to be all cleared up now."

I smiled in absolute happiness. "Nothing would make me happier than to be able to call you my friend again, Lou."

"I was always your friend, Eilana. I just left when you didn't want me around. I could never let go of you like that."

I was the one to stop in my tracks this time. I looked at him with a smile on my lips. "I love you Louis. And I really, really missed you." I hugged him, burying my head in his chest.

He laughed softly and hugged me back. "I missed you more, love." He hugged me tighter.

I turned my eyes up to him. "Best friends?"

"The most bestest of friends ever." He smiled down at me, tapping the tip of my nose.

I felt a rush of relief course through me. I teared up in happiness.

Louis noticed and laughed. "Don't cry now, love!" He hugged me back to him, holding my head in his hand like I was a baby.

I laughed through my tears. "I'm just so happy. This night has really gone well for me. I wasn't expecting any of this to happen." I told him.

"Well I'm so, so happy that it did." He grabbed my hand gently and kissed it. "We should probably get back before your boyfriend thinks I've stolen you."

"That's probably a good idea." I giggled.

We walked back to the guys and I told him I would see him again later as we parted ways. I walked back over to Niall and kissed him on the cheek.

"What's up, princess?" He wiggled his eyebrows at me.

"Guess what?!"

"What?!" He mocked my excitement jokingly, pretending to be a girl.

I slapped him playfully on the arm and giggled. "Louis and I are friends again! Isn't that great?" I told him excitedly.

He smiled brightly at the news and hugged me. "That's great, babe!" He kissed me.

"I'm feeling a little tired so I think I'm going to turn in for the night, kay?"

"Okay. I won't stay out too long." He puckered his lips.

I giggled at the sight and kissed him. He smiled happily and I stood up, saying goodnight to Harry and Liam. They returned it and I walked back to the beach house.

When I got there, I noticed Zayn was in the kitchen. He was rummaging through the refrigerator, but he didn't even notice me. I passed right by him and up the stairs to the bedroom that Niall and I were sharing. I checked the time. 4:36am. I brushed my teeth and checked updates on my phone. After a while I decided I would go out and stand on the balcony off of the hallway.

I leaned against the white railing and looked down at the people still getting hammered. I could see the boys from here and I smiled down at the dimly lit figures. I wasn't out there for long when I heard the doors open and shut behind me. I looked beside me to see Zayn leaning against the railing, his back to the scenery as he lit up a cigarette.

I didn't say a word and he looked at me, smoke trailing out of his mouth. "What?" He asked coldly.

"I didn't say a thing." I defended, looking away.

It was quiet for a little while. It wasn't an awkward silence, but it wasn't comfortable either.

"Want one?" He asked.

I looked over to see him gesturing at the small burning stick in his mouth. "No thank you. I don't smoke." I told him plainly.

He smirked at shifted his weight. "Of course you don't. You're a good girl."

I looked at him with narrowed eyes. "Is there something wrong with that?"

"No. But you just miss out on all the fun." He smiled.

I scoffed and rolled my eyes. "No thanks. I think I've had my share of being a bad girl. That decision didn't end too well." I told him, resting my chin on my hand.

"You mean almost fucking Liam." He stated nonchalantly.

I whipped my head around at him. "What?" My eyes were wide.

"Oh yeah, I know about that." He smirked knowingly.

"Who told you?" I asked quietly, afraid someone would hear us. Even though there was no possibility of it.

"No one told me. I just know." He said, blowing out a gray cloud again, a smirk still playing on his lips.

"How?" I asked again.

"It's obvious. Well, to me anyways. I can always tell when there's sexual tension between people. Harry didn't catch it. But he's never been too observant." He explained.

I sighed in frustration.

He looked at me curiously. "Don't worry, I'm not going to tell anybody." He laughed lightly.

"You must think I'm a terrible person and a slut now." I said, not really caring about his opinion so much.

"No." He turned his body to me, leaning on one arm. "I don't think it's that bad. But the fact that it was your boyfriend’s best mate, now that is pretty low. But I still don't think it's that bad. I really don't know why you're all making such a big deal about it." He looked up at the night sky.

"Because we actually have morals and emotions, Zayn." I rolled my eyes at him.

"I do to. Mine are just a little different." He stated.

"Sure. Whatever." I mumbled.

It went quiet again for a few minutes until I heard the doors behind me open again.

"There you are." I heard a familiar voice.

I turned around to be embraced by Niall. "I thought you said you were going to bed?" He tucked some hair behind my ear before kissing me.

"No. I just wanted to relax." I told him.

He nodded his head and smiled. "What are you doing out here?" He looked at Zayn.

I looked over in time to see Zayn lift up the cigarette between his fingers.

Niall nodded in understanding. "Well, we're going to turn in for the night." He announced to his friend.

"Alright see you tomorrow." He said blankly.

Niall kissed me passionately before turning and opening the door for me. I glanced back at Zayn to see him making a slightly disturbed face. I laughed quietly to myself and walked through the door.

When we got back to the room, Niall took off his shirt and started undoing his belt. "What were you and Zayn talking about?" He asked me.

"Nothing really. Just idle chattering." I started to change into something more comfy too.

"Oh. Well at least you guys are getting along somewhat." He commented as he threw his jeans to the side of the room.

I was just pulling on my soft red T when I turned around to see him almost naked. My eyes went wide and my cheeks started to heat up. "Ni!" I shrieked like a little girl. I had never seen him in such little clothing. He was... sexy. Standing there in just black Calvin Klein boxer briefs. I couldn't stop staring.

"What?" He chuckled.

I rolled my eyes and finally looked away. "I swear..." I trailed off, getting into the bed.

He turned off the lights and slid in next to me, putting his arms around me and tucking me into him. "Night, princess." He kissed my forehead.

"Night." I yawned.

~

"Just take us to my house, I'll drop her off later." Niall answered Harry's question.

We were finally home after the beach last night. We were getting back a little later than expected, but we all slept in anyway.

They dropped us off at Niall's house and I followed behind him to his room. I helped him unpack the few things from his bag and put them away.

"Um, El." He suddenly grabbed my hand and looked at me.

I was confused as I stared back. "Yes?" I waited for him to say something.

"I-I need to talk to you about something." His face cringed a little bit when he said it.

I furrowed my eyebrow and bit my lip. "Okay?"

"Well, I've been really thinking about it, and, there's a lot going on right now with you. What with all these new friends and Louis coming back into your life and all. I just think, maybe... we should take a break." He looked at me with an unsure expression.

I was silent with shock. This was the last thing I saw coming.

"I mean, I still love you. You know that. But, I feel like we could really use some time to clear our heads after all of this."

"You're right. That does sound reasonable." I looked down at my hand in between his two bigger ones.

"Just for a little while. We'll call it friends for now, and later when we feel that our thoughts are clear and sure, and if you still love me, and I love you, then we can get back together and work this out. But for now I think this is best. I'm sorry." He rubbed his thumb against the back of my hand and looked at me with sad eyes.

"No need to apologize. You're right. That's what we should have done from the beginning. I agree. It's sounds like a great idea." I told him, forcing a smile.

I do think it's a great idea, but I am a little sad obviously. I mean, he's my boyfriend and I love him. But he's right.

"I'm so glad you understand." He smiled and pulled me into a hug.

I hugged him back and tried not to show my hurt. He pulled away slightly and kissed me sweetly. "One for the road." He smiled.

I'm happy that I'll have some time to clear my thoughts, but at the same time, I'm a little scared that after all that's said and done, we won't love each other anymore...

Chapter Text

I giggled as Louis spun me around and put me back down again.

"I'm so happy." He smiled at me as he held the door open for me, I walked through and into the coffee shop.

"Me too." I smiled back. Even though I was feeling a little down these last few days since Niall and I have been on break, I was still my happiest around Louis. I missed that boy more than I realized.

I sat down at the table in the corner by the window. The one we always used to sit at. I pulled out my phone and started scrolling through tumblr as Louis got our drinks. I know he still remembers my favorite.

I put my phone down as he sat down across from me. I grabbed my drink and smiled at him. "Thanks, Lou-bear."

He smiled back and took a sip of his tea. "So how are you holding up?" He asked cautiously.

"I'm obviously upset about it, but I think it'll be good for us." I answered quietly, playing with the rim of my cup.

He nodded his head slowly and watched my hands. "Do you know how long you're going to be split for?"

I pursed my lips and shook my head. "We're just kind of going with it I guess. I'm confident that when we're both ready to talk about it again, we'll know."

"I think it's great that you have a positive attitude about it at least." He told me.

"Yeah, I try." My tone of voice sounded more depressed than I wanted.

Louis gave a sympathetic smile and grabbed my hand from across the table. "I'm sure you two will be fine. Don't be sad."

I smiled back shook my head. "Oh no, Louis. I'm happy! Maybe not about that particular situation, but I'm just happy in general. Happy to be spending time with you again. You keep me far from sad, believe me." I assured him.

His smiled brightened and he squeezed my hand gently. "Good. I'm glad I can do that for you."

I giggled and looked down. "Hey Lou?"

He bit his lip and raised his eyebrows, letting me know he was listening.

"What would you say if I asked you to meet with the guys?" I asked nervously.

He was silent for a minute.

"I mean, I was thinking about it, and I thought that it would be nice if we could all just get along and hang out together, you know?" I explained.

He very slowly started to nod his head, thinking about it. "I don't know Eilana. I just don't know if I can get on pleasantly with Harry." He told me.

I made a pouty face and put my other hand over our already joined hands. "Come on Lou! Pleeease! It would mean a lot to me. Just try! If you guys don't get along, then I'll forget about it, I promise." I leaned over the table and stared into his eyes innocently.

He smirked at me, knowing what I was trying to do, and chuckled. "Alright. I'll do it for you. I'm not making any promises, but I will try for you." He sighed, defeated.

I squealed and got up and hugged him. "Thank you, Louis! You don't know how happy this makes me! All my friends together in one group!" I smiled from ear to ear.

"They can't be that bad if you like them so much..." He mumbled, taking another sip of his warm beverage.

"They're not! I promise!" I bit my lip in excitement. "I can't wait!" I exclaimed.

"Well don't get too excited. Have you talked to them about this?" He raised his right brow.

"Well, no. But I'm sure they would be cool with it." I told him, shrugging my shoulders.

"If you say so. But don't get your hopes up too much. What if we don't get along?"

"Then you don't get along. I'll just have to continue making time for the both of you separately." I sipped on my drink. "I just thought it would be nice to not have to."

As if on cue, my phone started buzzing across the table. I picked it up and looked at it.

Curly

Hey, we're getting together at Liam's if you want to join? Should one of us pick you up?

"He's texting you now?" Louis scoffed at the sight, seeing that it was Harry before I even picked it up.

"Not often. But we are friends you know? In a weird way..." I trailed off, tapping at the tiny letters on my phone.

Would you guys mind if I brought Louis with me to hang?

"I'm asking them right now." I told him, sipping on my drink. I felt the phone buzz in my hand.

Lucky Charms

I think that sounds like it could be interesting. ;) I don't have any problem with him. Sure, bring him along. Do you need a ride?

"They said that it's fine." I grinned at him.

"Alright. So we're doing this now?" He questioned.

"Yep." I responded as I typed back.

Lucky Charms

Nope. I'm with Louis currently. We'll be over shortly.

I stuck my phone back in my pocket and got up, grabbing my drink and emptying the last drops if it into my mouth before throwing it in the trash bin.

Louis followed behind me and we made it out to his car. I gave him directions to Liam's house and we made it there with no trouble.

We got out of the car and walked up to the door. Louis sighed loudly.

"It won't be that bad." I nudged him rolling my eyes and smiling.

"Let's hope not." He mumbled under his breath.

I reached out and pushed the button by the door, hearing it ring out faintly from the other side.

After a minute or so, Liam came to the door and opened it, still laughing from some joke we had just missed. "Hey!" He greeted me and opened his arms. I hugged him and he looked back towards Louis. "Hey, mate. Come on in." He shot Louis a friendly smile and waved him in. Liam knew how important this was to me and I knew he would try his best to make it work.

Louis stepped in behind me, looking the place over silently. "How extravagant." He joked quietly so only I could hear him, making a snooty face to go along with it.

I giggled and smacked him on the arm. "Hey, it's not his fault his parents are so spoiled." Even though Liam's house was bigger than Louis', it was only by a little. so I really don't know what Louis was going on about.

"We were just all hanging out in the game room upstairs." Liam said as he lead us through the house and to the room with the other boys.

I hadn't ever been in this room before. I scanned the room, taking in the sight.

The walls were a dark blue color, and it had dark wood flooring. The lights were dim, but there were black lights all around the room, casting a neon glow all around the room from all the neon painted everything. Most of the decor and some of the furniture even, was neon and glowing. There was a projector in one corner, casting an image of the galaxy on the ceiling. There was a pinball machine and some arcade games in one corner, with a giant flat screen on the wall across from the semi-circle of seating where the boys were. On the other side of the room was a pool table and a mini bar. But it was pretty big and open. It was awesome in here.

I was greeted by the guys. Niall got up and hugged me. He stuck his hand out to Louis with a small grin on his face. "Hey, how are ya?" He offered.

Louis didn't hesitate to shake his hand for a second, returning the friendly smile. "I'm good, mate. How are you?"

"Fine, fine." He answered and sat back down.

Zayn gave a nod in Louis direction and then went back to looking at his phone. Harry just looked at him and looked to me, giving me a wave and a smile.

"Hi, Harry." I waved back, taking a seat next to Niall. "Zayn." I acknowledged.

He threw a quick wave at me without even looking up.

"See?" I said quietly to Louis as he sat next to me.

He nodded and bit his lip. "So far." He mumbled.

"So, anyone down for some pool?" Harry stood up and stretched.

"I'm out." I said. I didn't know how to play pool and I didn't intend to learn. It just didn't interest me to play. But I liked to watch.

Harry raised his brow at the room, pointing at people randomly.

"I'll play." Liam said, walking over and setting up the table.

"I'm in." Louis said, surprising me.

Zayn stood up and walked to the table without a word.

That left me and Niall sitting here on the couch. He smiled at me and threw his arms across the back of the couch, spreading out. "So what have you been up to?"

Niall and I haven't been hanging out as much outside of school since our break. I've been hanging with Louis the past few days. "Louis and I have been hanging out a lot, having fun." I smiled back.

"That's good. I can tell you guys are back to normal. I'm really happy that you guys worked things out. I can tell how happy he makes you." He grinned and laid his head back on the couch, closing his eyes.

"Me too." I did the same and closed my eyes. "What have you lads been up to?" I mocked in an Irish accent, giggling to myself.

Niall laughed at my attempt. "Same old." He answered shortly.

"That's shocking." I replied in sarcasm.

We both laughed. "I know, right?"

Louis' P.O.V

"You can team with me if you'd like?" Liam asked me, handing me a pool cue.

"Sounds good to me."

"Okay then Harry and Zayn you're on a team." He announced.

Harry and Zayn bumped fists and made an explosion sound as they started laughing at themselves.

I raised my eyebrows at them and looked away. Well, this was interesting. This was the last thing I expected to happen when Eilana suggested we hang out. I could tell that Harry was snubbing me but I didn't care. I wasn't so sure I wanted to befriend him again so soon.

I wonder if he really has changed like Eilana said he has? If that's true then I'm not seeing any signs of it yet. He seems to be the same old asshole he has been for the past few years.

I looked back to see Eilana and Niall chatting away happily on the couch. You would never know the two had split a few days before. There didn't seem to be any traces of awkward or bitterness. They were just happy and laughing amongst themselves.

"You're up." I heard Zayn say. First words he's spoken since I got here.

I lined up my shot and took it, watching the ball roll perfectly into the corner pocket.

I was pretty good at pool, if I do say so myself. Harry and I used to play it all the time back when we were friends, so he knew what he was up against. He was pretty good himself, but he never could beat me. I smirked at the memory as I stepped back.

"So, how have you been, Tommo?" I heard Harry's voice as he leaned against the wall.

I gave him a suspicious look but answered his question. "I've been alright. How about yourself?"

"I've been just great." He smiled that smile. The one that told you that he was messing with you. It didn't take a genius to figure out he wasn't sincere.

I don't know what kind of game he's playing, but I'm going to find out.

This just didn't add up. He's snubbed me all these years, but at the party a few months ago, he was there for me when I got into a fight with one of his best mates. Of course, then there's the fact that he was the one who told me about Niall's little plan to use Eilana and throw her to the side. But it was quite evident now that that was nothing but a lie. I can tell by the way that Niall looks at Eilana that he would never do something like that to her. But then why would Harry tell me such a lie?

He was the one that was telling me how Niall and Liam were bad news the whole time, but they're clearly not. They're the nicest ones here, and I know they wouldn't do anything but protect Eilana. I just wish I could have seen it sooner. I have Harry to thank for driving me into such a rage about Eilana and them's whole friendship. He was the one who made me worry about it. He made me worry over nothing. Now what the hell is that all about? What is he up to?

And he snubbed me not even ten minutes ago, but now he's going to be all buddy buddy with me? I don't think so. I'm going to get to the bottom of this.

My turn came around again and I bent over, lining up my shot once again. I shoved the cue forward with skill and watched the ball roll right into the pocket once again.

"You're really good at this." Liam commented.

"Thanks. My old friend and I played daily after school. He was good, but I was better." I smirked and looked at Harry, who was already glaring at me.

"Really?" Liam and Zayn chuckled.

"Yeah. He never could beat me..." I looked at Harry out of the corner of my eye, a smug look on my face.

He was still glaring intensely at me, but he didn't say a word.

Two can play this game, Styles.

Eilana's P.O.V

"Whoo! That was a close one!" I heard Liam shout as he and Louis bumped fists.

I saw Harry and Zayn with semi sour looks on their faces. I assumed they had lost. I was too zoned out talking to Niall the whole time that I didn't even pay any mind to who had won. But I think that was obvious.

I giggled at the two who were cheering for their victory over some stupid game. Such boys, I swear. I was just happy that they were getting along at least. I couldn't tell too much about Zayn and Harry, but they didn't seem to totally hate each other.

~

"So?" I asked Louis as we he drove me back home.

It was getting late at night now, so we decided we should head back home. We actually ended up staying the rest of the day. It was fun, and I'm pretty sure Liam and Louis were getting on real well.

"They're alright." He smiled over at me. "You were right, they aren't bad guys. But I'm sorry, I'm just not so sure about Harry though."

"Well, you don't have to make a final decision the very first time." I giggled at him.

"But Liam is pretty cool. And Niall seems like a good guy too. I didn't get to talk to him as much because you were talking his ear off the whole day, but I could tell he was nice." He chuckled, keeping his eyes on the road.

"Hey! Niall is my homeboy, okay?" I joked.

"I'm aware." He smiled as he pulled up to my house.

He got out and opened my door for me, helping me out. He walked me to the door and told me goodnight, hugging me and kissing me on the cheek.

I returned it and unlocked the door. "Love you, Lou!" I called back to him as he walked to his car.

He looked back and smiled brightly. "I love you too, Eilana."

I smiled at him before shutting the door. I sighed and dropped my things, leaving them where they lay. I walked to my bedroom and lay down on my back, arms out.

well that went better than I expected it too. I think Liam and Louis are a promised friendship in the works. I just hope I can say the same for Louis and Niall later. They're the ones that are the most important to me. Zayn and Harry are just a bonus, but I would love it if they could all get along. That would make things easier.

I just don't know what to do about Niall though. I mean, I really don't know what I feel towards him anymore. There's a part of me that misses us being together, but then there's a part of me that seems content with just being friends. I feel like Louis has to do with that though. Whenever he talks about me and Niall, it's like he thinks we're good together, but I feel like I still care for Louis in a romantic way. I just can't tell if he still feels the same or not. And I don't know how to feel about either answer because I'm still unclear about my feelings towards Niall.

I sighed and rubbed my face.

I don't know anymore. This is all very confusing. I feel like this time apart isn't helping me clear anything up at all. I just wonder if it's the same way for Niall...

Chapter Text

I just shut my locker when I was stopped by someone's voice in my ear.

"Guess who, love?"

I was having deja vu as I felt two hands wrap around my eyes and I smiled to myself. "Hey Louis." I greeted him.

I turned around to a pouting Louis. "After all this time, you're still out to ruin my fun aren't you?" He crossed his arms and stuck out his lip.

"Sure, Lou. That's my life goal." I laughed at him.

He cracked a smile and wrapped his arm around my shoulders as we walked out of the school. "Where are your boys?" He asked me.

"They all had stuff to do today. Niall and Liam are going boxing and Zayn has a date or something." I told him.

"Oh. What about Harry?" He questioned.

"I don't know. He didn't say what he was doing today." I pondered the thought.

Louis nodded his head and held the door open for me. "Do you need a ride somewhere?" He asked me with a smile.

"We're not hanging?" I was surprised at this.

He gave me a weird sorry kind of face. "Well, I kind of have family business to tend to." He rubbed the back of his neck and looked up at me from under his eyelashes.

"Oh. Well that's cool. I understand." I smiled at him.

"Sorry." He said.

"Nah, it's cool." I smiled and nodded my head.

"Where are you going to?" He asked again.

I opened my mouth to answer him, but I was cut short by a familiar voice.

"Hey, there you are!" I turned to see Harry walk up behind me with a smile on his face.

"Oh, hey Harry." I gave a small smile. "If you're looking for the boys, they had things to do." I told him.

"No, no. I was looking for you. I know where the boys are, I was just wondering, since I'm the only one who doesn't have plans, I thought maybe we could hang out or something?" He proposed, cocking his head to the side and squinting from the sun.

"Uh..." I looked to Louis who had a warning look on his face. I ignored it, knowing Harry wasn't a bad guy. At least not anymore. "Sure." I answered slowly, dragging out the word.

His face lit up. "Awesome! You can just ride with me then."

I nodded my head and looked to Louis who had quite an interesting face.

"Eilana, no." He started quietly when Harry started to walk towards his car.

"It's fine, Lou. I'll be okay. He's not going to do anything." I told him.

"You don't know that. How long have you been friends with him?" He asked, doing air quotes at the word friends.

I rolled my eyes and smiled. "Only a month, but I know him well enough to know better." I assured him.

He raised his eyebrows at me. "A month? Yep, that's a strong friendship there." He joked sarcastically.

I giggled and hugged him. "I'll be fine, Louis. Text me when you're done with stuff, maybe we can hang tonight or something." I kissed his cheek.

"Eilana." He said sternly.

"What?" I looked at him. He just stared back. "Okay, fine. I'll text you every hour so you know I'm okay, alright?"

He sighed. "Fine. I don't know why you're so insistent on hanging out with him though." He looked to the side.

"Because I'm trying to build a better friendship." I told him plainly. "And besides, it's better than hanging out alone at the house."

"Yeah, yeah. Well have fun and be safe alright? You better text me." He hugged me again and started walking to his car.

I turned around to see Harry pull up in his black Lamborghini Reventon. The window rolled down to reveal a smiling Harry. "Come on." He invited me in.

I got in and shot him a grin. "So where to?" I asked him.

"I don't know. What do you want to do?" He asked me.

"I don't know. What do you usually do?" I asked back.

He thought for a second and then laughed lightly to himself. "No. How about we just go bowling or something?"

I gave a confused look. "Sounds fun to me."

He smiled and started driving. He handed me his iPod and I searched for some good music. As I scrolled through it, I realized that we had practically the same taste in music. Surprising.

I turned on The Rolling Stones and we jammed out all the way to our destination.

I wasn't paying any attention to where he was taking me until we started to drive down a long road through what looked to be a forest of some sort. It was completely shaded by trees on either side of the road, and it wasn't very straight.

I looked at him funny and he just grinned. I looked in front of me again to see that the road finally opened up to a giant building.

Wait, this isn't his house is it? Holy shit it's huge.

My eyes widened trying to take all of it in. "What is this place?" I asked him in amazement.

"My house." He said grinning as we pulled up in front of the house and he parked his car there. He came around and opened the door for me.

"Thanks." I mumbled uncomfortably to him. This was weird. I had never been around just Harry before. Not while we were friends anyway. And now him being all polite was weirding me out.

Suddenly a man came running out of nowhere and he took Harry's keys and got in his car and drove it around to the back of the house.

"Who the hell was that?" I asked him.

"That's our valet." He told me, looking confused that it wasn't obvious. "Do you know what that is?" He raised his brow at me.

I scoffed and looked him up and down, hand on my hip. "Yes I know what that is! It's just not normal to have one at your house." I told him.

He nodded his head and walked to the front door and opened it. "You coming in?" He chuckled as he looked back at me.

I whipped around and quickly walked to the door. I was distracted by the scene. I had seen giant houses before, but nothing this grand. This was ridiculous.

He opened the door for me and waved me in first. I awkwardly walked in and noticed a man standing by the door. He looked to be an older man. He had graying hair and a slightly wrinkled face. He was wearing a suit and a hat. But he remained expressionless.

"You can give him your stuff." He closed the door and gave the man his coat and book bag.

"Hello master Harry." The man smiled at Harry.

"Hey William."He greeted back and started to walk off.

I panicked and gave the man my coat and book bag and tried to catch up to Harry.

"What are we doing here?" I asked him when I caught up.

"You said you wanted to go bowling, right?"

I gave him a confused look. "Yeah? So what are we doing here?"

"Why not just use mine?"

"Wait. You have your own bowling alley?"

"Of course we do." He replied nonchalantly.

I rolled my eyes and kept following him through this huge house. It started to feel like we were never going to get where we were going. "How fucking far is this room?" I asked him after about three minutes of walking.

"Right here." He suddenly stopped in front of a door and opened it to reveal a mini bowling alley.

It had four lanes, and a whole wall of bowling balls. It was decorated in dark colors and neons. There was a mini bar and seating and it was lit with black lights.

"Woah."

"It'll do, right?" He asked me, walking over to set up the scoreboard.

"...Yeah, I think it will suffice." I said sarcastically and looked at him like he was crazy.

He didn't say anything and picked out a bowling ball. Of course he picked the heaviest one. I rolled my eyes and went for a lighter one that was a neon green color.

"I hope you're good at this, because I'm not going to go easy on you." He chuckled at me.

"Oh, great. I'm terrible at bowling." I sighed.

"Well, too bad because you're up first." He smirked at me.

I stepped up and lined up my shot. When I was satisfied I let the ball roll and watched it knock down every pin. I smirked to myself and turned around to see Harry with his mouth hanging open.

"You got a strike?! On your first go?!" He was shocked.

"Beginners luck, I guess." I walked over and took a seat as I watched him step up and throw the ball. He also got a strike. He walked back over with a smirk on his face.

"And that is skill." He bragged.

"Well, you're probably going to win then."

"Probably? Oh no, I'm not going to get beat by a girl." He laughed.

I stepped up again and with ease, got another strike. I had to hold back my laughter as I saw Harry's face. "I guess today is just my day." I smiled and sat down again.

"Okay, alright, that beginners luck is sticking with you. But I don't have anything to worry about, I'll still beat you." He stepped up confidently and made another strike. "See? No luck needed."

I rolled my eyes when he wasn't looking and quietly laughed to myself. Little did he know, no one ever beat me at bowling. If there was anything I was good at, it was this.

"Your turn, love." He smirked at me as he watched me step up again. But the smirk fell from his face when I got another strike.

This was becoming a tight game, but I knew I would win in the end. We had almost both played perfect games, but both of us had missed a few pins one round. It was the tenth frame and I had bowled all three strikes. Harry was so frustrated at this 'luck' I was having and I could tell that his anger would affect his game.

He bowled strikes the first two frames, now if he got the third one, he would beat me by one point. It was completely silent as he threw the last one. We both watched it as it rolled. It hit the pins, but two of them still stood.

"No." He mumbled. "No! No, no, no!" He continued his small temper tantrum. He turned to me and saw me cheering to myself.

"Whoo! Still undefeated!" I cheered.

"You!" He pointed at me with a frown. "You played me! You're great at bowling and you lied to me!" He accused.

I stopped what I was doing and looked at him with a shocked face. "What? I would never!" I feigned hurt and put my hand over my heart. He just stared at me knowingly. "Okay, okay. You got me. I'm like, the master of bowling." I told him, a smug grin growing on my face.

He scoffed and laughed at himself. "So sneaky! I like that." He smirked at me and held his fist out. "Good game though."

I bumped it with my fist. "Thanks." I smirked back.

I just beat Harry Styles. I. Just. Beat. Harry. Styles.

I wanted to run around and let the world know. I was feeling so smug right now.

"I still can't believe you beat me." He smiled and hung his head, shaking it.

I laughed as I watched his curls sway back and forth at the movement. "Only by like, three points. That's not bad." I patted his back.

"Yeah, yeah." He looked around with his hands on his hips. "I'm thirsty." He said. He walked over to the bar and started to make himself a drink. "You want something?" He asked me.

"No thanks. I don't really drink." I told him, waiting for the teasing that was to ensue.

"Oh. Well can I get you something non-alcoholic?"

That's all he has to say? He's not going to tease me about it?

"Um, I'll just have a water." I told him quietly.

He nodded and poured his drink into a glass and got an empty glass out and poured some ice and water into it, putting a slice of lemon on the rim and a gave it to me.

"Thank you."

He gave me a nod and took a sip of his drink. "So what do you want to do now?" He leaned against the bar.

"I don't know. What else do you have in this house?"

"You name it." He stared at me.

"How about..." I put my finger to my chin in thought. "Video games?"

He smirked. "You're on."

~

"Okay, you've beat me like a hundred times Harry. Does that make up for me beating you earlier?" I laughed as I set the controller down.

"Almost." He grinned at me.

We were sitting on the floor in his home theater playing games on the huge screen.

"I'm glad we did this." He said, leaning back on his hands.

"Me too. Today has actually been fun." I smiled at him.

"Were you expecting it to not be?" He asked.

"Well, I didn't think past the fact that it was weird hanging out with you alone." I told him honestly, laughing.

"Well, now you know I'm just a normal guy. Just like any of your other friends. We can hang out too." He told me.

"Yeah, you're right. I'm sorry I judged you so harshly to begin with, but I'm sure you can understand."

"Of course. You had every right to. I'm the one that should be apologizing anyway. I'm still really sorry about the way that I treated you. I still feel bad about it." He looked down.

"Don't worry about it. It's in the past."

He looked at me and tilted his head. "Are you saying you forgive me?"

I thought for a second. "I guess I am, yeah. I didn't think I ever would, but I can tell you've really changed." I reached over and ruffled his hair.

He scrunched up his face and chuckled. "Thanks. I've been really trying. I'm happy that you noticed. I really think being around you has helped me a lot."

"What do you mean?" I was confused.

"I mean, the way that I was living before, I thought I was happy, but I wasn't. I see that now. But now I can really say that I'm happy. Being around all my friends without any drama and hanging around you too now. It's refreshing. It makes me think of better days when I was younger." He smiled at the memory.

I smiled to myself. I was actually happy for him. "That's awesome. I'm happy for you, Harry."

He looked at me and grinned. "Thanks."

"Things were different when you were younger?" I asked him.

"Yeah. I wasn't very popular and I was only ever concerned about the one friend I had. We had been friends since we were little kids and we were the absolute best of friends. We did everything together. We spent every minute of every day together. I really miss him." He brought his knees to his chest and put his arms around them, resting his chin on his arms.

"Sounds like you two were inseparable."

"We were." He looked down, almost closing his eyes.

"What happened?" I asked hesitantly.

"High school. That's what happened." He narrowed his eyes at nothing.

"Oh. Did you guys have a fight or something?"

"Not really. I started to change. So much so that eventually I felt like we couldn't be friends anymore because we were total opposites. I snapped at him one day and that was the last time we spoke for a while. It was my fault. I was just being a dumbass." He vented.

"What made you change so drastically?" I hated to keep asking him questions. I knew it wasn't my business, but I was curious.

"I got sucked into the popular group. I'm not as strong about peer pressure as my friend was. I started hanging out with the wrong people and I did some bad things. But honestly, I felt bad about it. I hadn't been a bad kid before, so I felt guilty for every little thing I did. But I wanted to be cool so bad that I just pushed my conscience to the back of my mind, and there it stayed until a little while ago."

This was shocking to hear. I had judged Harry so much for being the way that he was, that I never stopped to think about why he was like that. I always assumed that he had been bad his whole life.

"Oh." I didn't know what else to say. I was speechless. I felt bad for him.

It was quiet for a little while. He just kept curled up in a ball, zoned out at nothing. I stared at him for a while, but he didn't even notice. It was weird. Seeing him like this, he looked so innocent. He didn't look scary and menacing like I was used to him looking. He just looked like a sweet boy who had never done anything wrong.

"Harry?" I waved my hand in front of his face slowly.

"Hm?" He looked at me from the corner of his eyes.

"Oh... I'm sorry for prying. I'm just a curious person." I apologized.

"Oh, no. It's okay. You weren't prying. Honestly it felt good to tell someone about it."

I furrowed my brow. "You've never told anyone about that before?"

"No. It's never come up before. And even if it did, I don't think I would tell anyone."

"Then why did you tell me?" I asked. This was weird. I thought if anyone, I would be the last person he would tell something like this to.

"I don't know. It's weird, I just feel like I can open up to you. For some reason, I feel like I can be myself around you. Even though we're not very close, I can tell there's something about you. You don't judge people. Not when you get to know them. And there's something comforting about you." He looked at me, examining me closely.

"Oh. Well you would be right about the no judging thing." I told him, giggling slightly.

He smiled at me brightly. "That's what I like about you, Eilana. You're a real person. You're not anything like the other girls at school. You don't pretend around me, you don't try to be perfect, you don't stiffen up and try to look your best. You're not concerned with any of that. I can just see the real you. And I like the real you." He smiled at me sweetly.

It's so weird to see him like this. Being so nice and gentle. But I'm happy to know that he has a side like this.

"Thank you, Harry. I like the real you too. I had no idea that you were like this."

He chuckled. "Well, I haven't been for some time. But I've changed, and now I'm trying to find my way back to the person I used to be."

"Good for you, Harry. Whatever I can do to help, let me know. I want you to be happy and I hope you can work this out." I smiled at him.

"Thanks. But, why are you being so nice to me?" He asked, a confused look on his face.

I laughed lightly and rolled my eyes. "I consider you a friend now Harry, and friends help friends." I explained to him.

He smiled and for a minute, I could swear I saw a tear in his eye. "Thank you, Eilana. I'm glad we're friends. Same here, okay? If there's ever anything you need help with, you can come to me. I would do anything for someone like you."

I nodded my head and kept smiling. "Thanks."

I felt my pocket vibrating and dug out my phone.

Lou-Bear

Are you okay? He didn't hurt you did he? Do I need to come get you?

I laughed lightly at the text. He was worrying for nothing. Harry and I were having such a good conversation that I forgot to text him this hour.

"Who's that?" Harry asked.

"It's just Louis." I told him.

No Louis. I'm fine. I'm actually having fun with him. Sorry, I just forgot to text you this time.

"Do you need to leave?" He asked me.

I looked at the clock. 7:46pm.

"No. But I'm getting hungry." I told him, laughing.

"Oh. I'm getting hungry too, now that you mention it. Do you want to go get something?"

"You're mom isn't cooking for you?" I asked him.

He laughed. "No. My mom doesn't cook. And our family dinners are always awkward anyway." He told me.

"Oh. Do you just eat out all the time?"

"Pretty much. We do have a cook though. Clara. She's cool." He smiled to himself.

"You have your own cook?" I raised my eyebrows at him once again.

"Of course. We've gotta eat." He shrugged.

"Well then, sure. Let's go get something." I told him, standing up.

He stood up too and we made our way back to the front door.

On our way there, we passed by a girl walking down the hall. She looked to be about thirty something, and she had blonde hair and was dressed in all black. "Who was that?" I asked him.

"That's one of our maids." He answered.

I mouthed an 'Oh.' and kept walking in silence until we got to the door. Harry hit a button on the wall. I looked and there was a few of them. "What's that?" I asked.

"It calls my car."

I rolled my eyes at how ridiculous this was. I turned around and the same man was standing there again, holding out our stuff.

"Thank you, William." Harry took his coat and put it on. He grabbed my stuff too and held my coat out for me.

I looked at him weird, but I turned around and let him help me put it on. He walked out the door with my book bag still in hand.

When I got outside, I saw that his car was waiting on us already. He threw my bag into the back of it and got in. The man opened my door for me and closed it when I got in.

"Your house is so ridiculous." I told him.

"Really? I've never lived any other way so I wouldn't know." He started to drive.

I fought him forever about not going anywhere too expensive when he told me he was buying me dinner. But I finally backed down and he smiled triumphantly at his win.

When we got there, we got immediate service and the whole wait staff was in a flurry about his arrival.

"What the hell is up with them?" I whispered to him.

"My dad owns this place." He told me.

"Does your dad own all of England?" I joked.

"You could say that." He laughed.

I rolled my eyes and followed him to our table. We sat down and decided what we wanted. The waiter was waiting on us like a mad man. I could tell he was horribly nervous. He took our orders and left quickly.

"Why is he so nervous?" I asked him.

"Because at the snap of my fingers he could lose his job." He told me.

"You wouldn't do that though, would you?"

"No. I used to be like that though. I wish I could give all those people their jobs back." He looked down.

I didn't say anything. I didn't know what to say.

"So you and Niall, how come you guys split?" He asked me.

"It's just temporary. But we just felt that we could use some time to think clearly about things. We kind of rushed into that relationship." I told him as much of the truth as I could.

He nodded his head. "Oh. And how is that working out for you?"

"Good." I lied.

"That's good. Niall's a good boyfriend?"

What a weird thing to ask me. "Um, yeah. He's great."

"I thought so. He's always so sweet and gentle to girls. I've always been envious of that." He confessed.

"Why? You could just be the same way, you know?"

"It's not so easy for me. I always screw up somehow. I don't have a very good temper. I'm sure you've noticed." He chuckled nervously and looked down.

"Well, yeah. But you never seem to have any trouble with girls." I stated.

"No, but it attracts the wrong kind of girl. I don't want that kind of girl. I want a real relationship. Not one based on infatuation. I want real love. But I can't find it with the way I attract girls." He explained.

"Oh. I understand." I said quietly.

I felt so bad for him. I didn't realize he was so lonely.

~

"Is this it?" He asked me as we pulled up to my house.

"Yep." He opened the door for me and I got out of the car and walked to my door.

"We should hang out more often." He said with a smile.

"Yeah. I actually had fun. I'm glad we did this, I feel like I know you better now." I told him.

He smiled at me and stood there awkwardly. "Well, I guess I should get going then." He started to turn around but I stopped him.

"I guess you've earned one." I joked and hugged him.

He seemed shocked but he hugged me back carefully. "Bye." He pulled away with a big smile on his face and he walked back to his car.

"Bye, Harry." I waved to him and went inside.

I pulled out my phone immediately, texting Louis.

I'm home. Safe and sound. :) See you tomorrow. xx

I can't believe I just had such a great time with Harry Styles. Who would have thought? But I really like him now that I know what he's like really. He's pretty cool. I never thought I would think something like that about him just a month ago. But he's proven himself, and I'm glad I gave him that chance.

Chapter Text

"Well I say we watch The Expendables." Harry said, crossing his arms.

"No way! That movie sucks!" Liam protested. "We should watch whatever Eilana wants to watch." He grinned at me sweetly.

I've come down with a bad cold, and so now all of the boys are here to spend a lazy day with me. One by one, they all showed up at my door, making sure I was okay. And pretty soon it somehow became a party at my house. Though I didn't mind. I was enjoying it.

So now we're all sitting here in my living room and we've been trying to decide on a movie for the last half hour. Long story short, we're getting nowhere.

"I really don't mind though. Whatever you guys want to watch." I shrugged and looked back down at my phone.

"Well we obviously aren't going to agree on anything, so you have to pick." Louis chuckled as he threw his arm around me.

I sighed contently and looked around the room with a silly face, going through movies in my head. The room was silent as they all stared at me in question, waiting for my answer. "What about Gone With the Wind?" I asked with a playful smile on my face.

A chorus of groans was heard and I laughed silently to myself.

"Please don't make me watch that again!" Louis exclaimed as he buried his head into my shoulder, practically begging.

"She made you watch that? I'm so sorry." Niall joked.

"Yes! That is the longest movie ever made. Ever." He said, rolling his eyes.

I jabbed him in the side and laughed. "Hey! It's a good movie! I was only joking anyway, I'm not going to make you all watch that. And besides Louis, you liked it!" I teased.

"Shh! Don't blow my manly cover!" He joked.

The boys all laughed at us and Harry stood up. "Well if you don't pick a movie in the next minute, I'm putting in whatever movie I see fit." He said, smiling cheekily at me.

I stuck my tongue out at him. "Just put in a Disney movie then!"

"Which one?! That's still not picking a movie!" He laughed at me.

"I don't know! Don't put me on the spot!" I laughed. "Just-Maybe-I don't know!" I laughed.

"The clock is ticking!" He made a back and forth motion with his finger.

I laughed at my panic. "Um, Aladdin!" I got out just before the minute passed.

Harry snapped his fingers and pursed his lips. "Dammit!" He laughed. "Alright, where is it?"

"It's over there on the shelf. Duh!" I pointed to the shelf of movies that was so obviously sitting there and jokingly made fun of Harry for asking that question.

"Well I don't have X-ray vision! I'm not Spiderman! He joked, flailing his arms.

We all looked at each other and busted out laughing. "That's Superman! Not Spiderman!" We all laughed at Harry's mistake. Even Harry. "And besides, how would having X-ray vision help you? It's right there in plain sight!" I gestured towards the shelf.

"Well I'm so sorry!" He laughed as he grabbed the movie off the shelf.

"Harry, I swear..." Zayn trailed off, shaking his head with a smile.

"What?!" He turned around quickly with his arms out to his sides. "You all expect too much of me!" He laughed.

"Just put the damn movie in, slave!" I joked and pretended to crack a whip at him.

Everyone laughed at me and Harry finally sat back down in his seat next to Niall on the other couch. "Are there boobs in this movie?" Louis asked jokingly.

Everyone cracked up. "Well, Jasmine's dad has a pretty good rack going on." I told him.

He chuckled, already having watched this movie with me a million times, he knew exactly what I was talking about.

"What the hell?" Niall laughed along with the others.

The whole movie was interrupted by tons of jokes and singing along in funny voices. My sides hurt from laughing so much. Today was the best time I've had in a while. I definitely felt better already.

As the credits started to roll, I stretched and looked around the room at the guys. Niall and Harry were sitting on the couch diagonal me, legs tangled up in their bromance. I smiled and rolled my eyes. Zayn was still laying on his stomach in front of Liam, me, and Niall on the couch. Liam, Louis and Zayn were all having a laugh together about something and I smiled genuinely to myself, so happy that they were all getting along.

It's been a week since Harry and I spent that day together, and everything seemed to be back to normal again. Well, besides Harry and Zayn being in the mix this time. But I actually liked it. It was nice. Harry and I have really been more relaxed around each other since that day, and we've grown a lot closer. I consider him a good friend now. Zayn on the other hand, I can't say that we're close. But he is a pretty cool guy and he's nice to me for the most part. Still likes to tease, but it's all harmless fun.

I'm still happy with the fact that Louis and I are okay again. Liam and I are back to normal, with no signs of awkwardness. And for now, I'm content with just being friends with Niall. But in all honesty, I'm not even sure how I feel about him anymore. Just a week ago I thought I was in love. But I guess I'm not after all. But I still think I like him like that. I don't know anymore.

"I'm hungrrryyyy!" I heard Liam suddenly.

Everyone looked at him and he was making a grumpy little kid face. "Well get food then!" Harry jokingly raised his voice.

"I think pizza." I thought aloud.

"Yes! Pizza is always good sick food." Louis chimed.

"Actually, no it's really not." I chuckled.

"Do you want pizza?" He asked me.

"Yes." I replied.

"Well then that's all that matters!" He retrieved his phone from his pocket and started to look up the number for our favorite pizza place.

He took all of our requests and then went through them in his head before calling.

"Now everyone be quiet while Louis orders the food." I joked, shaking my finger at them.

Of course they all looked at each other and smiled mischievously. As soon as Louis started speaking, they all went crazy. Harry ran over and turned on the music system, Zayn started to sing along loudly as he and Harry danced like weirdo’s, and Niall and Liam were poking at Louis' cheek and pinching his face as he was trying to talk over all of it. I tried my best to contain my laughter but it was such a hilarious sight.

Louis somehow managed to give the order and hung up the phone. He looked around at all of us with a playful smirk and pointed around at us. "You loud bastards." He cracked up.

We all started laughing and eventually wound up sprawled out across the couches and each other, just lazing as we waited for the pizza hungrily.

The sudden sound of the doorbell ringing caused all of our heads to shoot up simultaneously. Liam jumped up first and practically ran to the door. He answered it and we all looked on as the delivery man gave us strange looks from the door. Liam gave him the money and took the food from him, shutting the door and leaving to the kitchen. The rest of the boys followed behind closely. I stayed on the couch right where I was. I wasn't feeling too good, thanks to the state of my health at the moment. This was a really bad cold, and I didn't feel like moving too much.

"Here you go, love." I looked up to see Niall smiling down at me with a plate of pizza in his hand.

"Thanks, Ni." I smiled back and took the plate.

"So how are you feeling? Any better?" He asked as he took a seat next to me.

"Physically? I feel...ew. Emotionally though, I feel great." I told him, taking a bite of my warm pizza.

He put his plate down on his lap and threw an arm around me. "That's good to hear." He smiled at me and kissed me on the cheek.

I pretended to be disgusted and wiped at my cheek. "Don't talk with your mouth full, and especially don't kiss people!" I laughed and wiped the pizza grease from my cheek onto his jeans. He laughed and shrugged his shoulders.

The rest of the boys came filing in, already eating off their plates. "What now?" I asked.

They all exchanged glances and shrugged. "What do you want to do?" Harry asked.

"I don't know. What do you guys want to do?"

"We're going in circles, guys." Niall announced.

"Well, how about a board game or something?" I suggested.

"Ooh! Yeah! Let's play a board game!" Harry shouted excitedly.

"Woah, calm down there." I laughed. "What about The Game of Life?"

"I love that game!" Louis exclaimed loudly.

"I know." I looked at him like he was an idiot.

"I'll get it!" He said, as he got up and ran to the game closet.

"I'm going to win! I'm the best at that game! And Liam sucks at it!" Zayn laughed.

Liam gasped and made a mean face. "How dare you!" He pointed at Zayn.

"What? It's just your luck, mate. Nothing you can do about that." He stated.

"I'm going to prove you wrong." He smirked.

"Guys, it's just the game of life. It's not even that competitive." I laughed.

"Oh you just wait." Liam said.

Louis came back with the board game and we all sat down around the coffee table with our pizza as we set it up.

"I want to be the blue car!"Zayn whined when he saw Niall pick it up. "You be the orange or the green car since you're Irish, and let me have the blue one!"

Niall laughed at him. "Hey! That's borderline racist!" He joked.

"But I'm always the blue car!" Zayn continued whining, and crossed his arms.

I couldn't help but laugh at the sight. It was so unusual seeing him like this. I was used to seeing him as this big, menacing figure, but really he was just as much a child as any one of us. If not more so, actually.

Niall handed over the blue car reluctantly and picked up another one. "Ya' happy now, ya' whiny ass?" Niall teased.

Zayn didn't say anything, just smiled triumphantly as he put his little man in the car. I rolled my eyes and laughed at him. "You're so ridiculous."

The game was moving surprisingly slow, as all the jokes we were making and all the friendly bickering was slowly eating away at the time.

"Harry you can't just lay your kids down in car! They'll fall out!" Liam laughed as Harry tried to fit his eight kids in the tiny six seater car.

"Well it's not my fault they don't all fit! Maybe you should talk to my wife about not having any more kids!" He joked.

"I wouldn't have to if you would keep it in your pants more often!"He argued back.

We all chuckled at the discussion happening in front of us.

"It's my wife though! There's no need to keep it in my pants!" He laughed.

Liam put his hand on his face and rolled his eyes, sighing. "Harry..."

"You guys! It's a fucking game!" I laughed. "You're bickering about Harry's fictional wife and kids!" We all kept laughing at the ridiculous situation.

Eventually we got on with the game and Niall wound up winning. "Hah!" He smiled in victory.

"Guys, what time is it?" Louis asked.

"It's 12:17am." Zayn answered, looking at his phone.

Harry yawned and then I yawned. I didn't realize how tired I was until now. "I'm absolutely dead." Harry told us as he rubbed his eyes like a little boy.

"Me too." I agreed.

"Yeah." Liam shook his head, stretching.

"I think it's about time for some sleep." Louis said, getting up.

"Well who's going to stay with Eilana?" Niall asked.

"Oh, don't worry about me. I'll be fine. You boys just go on home." I told them, smiling.

"Nope. Someone needs to be here in case you need something or you feel bad." Liam insisted.

"I'm not a baby guys." I rolled my eyes.

They completely ignored me and began talking amongst themselves. "I'll stay with her." Niall said.

"You've looked after her for a while, I'll do it this time." Louis offered.

"Don't worry, I'll do it." Liam piped up.

"I wouldn't mind staying at all. So you can leave it to me." Harry stated.

They all looked to Zayn, expecting him to say something. "What? There's no way she would agree to me staying with her, so why bother offering?" He shrugged.

They all nodded their head and agreed on that.

"Why don't we all just stay here?" Liam suggested.

They thought about it for a second before they decided it was a good idea.

"Good news! We're all going to stay." Louis told me.

"Yeah, I heard you guys." I giggled. "But where are you all going to sleep though?"

"Simple. We'll just get all the blankets and pillows you have, and make a giant bed right here." Niall said, pointing to the middle of the living room floor.

They all went around gathering all the soft stuff they could find, and laid it out on the floor strategically. It actually covered most of the floor and it was very soft and comfy.

Louis picked me up and carried me over to it, gently placing me down in the very middle of it. The guys all stripped of their belts and shirts and one by one, laid down in the cloud of soft, inviting pillows and blankets.

Louis tucked himself in right next to me, and Niall cuddled up on the other side. I was happy with this arrangement since they were the only two that I had spent the night with before, so I was comfortable with it. Harry laid down next to Niall, and Zayn next to Harry. Liam turned off the lights and carefully walked back over and got in next to Louis.

The sheets were a little cold because the heater wasn't coming on and it was freezing outside, but with all the boys body warmth, I couldn't have been warmer. Tucked between Louis and Niall, I was on my back and turned my face towards Louis, whose arm was tucked gently over my waist, while Niall had grabbed my hand. When we were together, Niall would always grab my hand before he went to sleep. I thought it was the cutest thing. But I loved the way Louis would hold me when we slept. And right now, between the two of them, I've never felt safer.

Niall leaned over and kissed my cheek sweetly. "Night, El. Feel better tomorrow." He cuddled back down, pulling my hand to his chest.

I heard more rustling as Louis moved closer and kissed my other cheek. "Good night Eilana. I love you." He whispered into my ear and inched closer to me, nestling his face into my shoulder.

My head was nothing but a whirlwind of emotions right now. I'm exhausted from today. Sure, part of it was from being sick, but the other part was from my ever growing confusion towards these boys. I'm not confident that I'll ever know the answer. It seems with each passing day, things make less sense

How did I ever get into this? I just want things to make sense for a change. Is that too much to ask? Ugh. This would be so much easier if both of them weren't such perfect, lovable, sweet boys. I'm starting to wonder if I'll ever figure this mess out. But I hope I do soon. This is making me crazy.

Chapter Text

I played with the rim of my coffee cup as I sucked in a big breath of the outside air. I took a break from watching all the people walking by and looked across the small table to Harry. He was texting someone and his curls were falling into his eyes as he furrowed his eyebrows in concentration. I grinned slightly at the sight. It was so nice to not be fighting with him. That got so old and so tiring. This was much better.

Harry and I were sitting at a table outside of a cafe, sipping drinks and enjoying the nice day. Even though it was freezing out here, it was still pretty sunny. Which was unusual for this place. So we decided we would go outside for the day.

Everyone was busy again, so Harry and I decided to hang out. I was completely better now. It's been a week since I had that nasty cold, and I was feeling better than ever. And with Christmas right around the corner, I was as giddy as a kid in a candy store.

Christmas time was always my favorite time growing up. Not because of all the presents, but because it was the only time my family got along all year. It was the happiest part of my childhood. But unfortunately, it still wasn't always such a merry Christmas for us. But I still loved it.

"Can I get a check for you?" The young attractive waiter asked me with a smile.

I smiled back shyly and nodded my head. "Yes, thank you."

Harry's head shot up immediately at the sound of the waiter. "Just put her on my tab. We're together." He shot a glare at the boy.

"I can get it, Harry." I told him, reaching for my wallet.

"No. I've got it." Harry quickly stated, shooing the waiter off.

I gave Harry a questioning look. "Thanks. You seem a bit snappy today..." I mumbled, putting my wallet back into my bag.

"I just don't like that guy." He said, taking a sip of his tea.

"Why not? He's a perfectly nice guy, and a very good waiter." I shrugged.

Harry scoffed and rolled his eyes. "That's what he's trying to make you think. He's a scumbag, Eilana. Don't even look at him again." He crossed his arms over his chest and leaned back in his chair.

"Excuse me? How do you know that? And who do you think you are to tell me not to do something?" I crossed my arms, mimicking his movement.

He laughed sarcastically to himself. "Trust me, I just know. He's looking at you like you're a piece of meat. And I'm sorry, I don't mean to tell you to do anything. I'm just looking out for you and your best interests. And believe me, that guy is not one of them." He eyed the waiter through the glass window we were sitting next to.

"Well, thank you Harry, but I don't need your help with that. I'll decide who I like and who I don't like on my own." I laughed lightly.

Harry looked up at me through his curls, about to say something when the waiter came back, check in hand.

"Here you are, sir." He set the piece of paper down in front of Harry. He glanced at me and smiled.

I blushed at put my head down, but only for a second before Harry suddenly stood up so fast, his chair fell over. He grabbed the waiter by his shirt and pulled him close. "Listen here you wanker, if you look at her like that one more time, I swear it will be the last thing you'll ever see." He narrowed his eyes at the boy and let him go, shoving him back in the process.

He slammed money down on the table and grabbed me by the wrist, almost dragging me away before I could grab my things, and started walking away in an angry huff.

"Harry! Harry slow down!" I pulled back at my wrist, trying to keep up with the large strides he was taking.

He stopped at a cross walk finally, waiting on the traffic. "Sorry." He mumbled under his breath.

"It's okay. But why in the hell did you react like that? It's not even a big deal..." I looked away.

He was silent. He didn't give me an answer, just stood there. Anger was still clearly etched on his features as we waited.

I looked down at his large hand wrapped around my wrist still. I blushed and felt something in my stomach flip when I realized he was still touching me.

He had kept to the no touching rule this whole time, so I wasn't used to touching him. His skin was so warm and soft. It surprised me. I had never paid any attention to his touch before, when he used to grab me all the time. I was always too focused on how mad I was, but now I couldn't ignore it.

"Um, Harry?" I timidly said, as I looked at his hand.

"What?" He looked back at me, and then down at what I was staring at. "Oh, sorry." He apologized, slipping his hand down and grabbing my hand instead of my wrist.

I was surprised at this even more and didn't know what to say.

Is Harry Styles holding my hand? Although I don't mind, it's just...weird. And my stomach feels weird.

"I didn't hurt you did I?" He looked at me with innocent eyes. All the signs of anger were gone now.

"What?" I shook my head in confusion, not hearing what he said.

"When I grabbed you earlier, did I hurt you? He asked again.

"Oh, no. I'm fine." I replied slowly, still feeling a little weird at the contact.

"Good. Just, sometimes when I'm angry, I use more of my strength than I should and I hurt people without realizing it." He looked back across the street as the signal for us to cross lit up. He gently pulled me behind him across the street by my hand.

"Where are we going, anyway?" I asked him as we made it to the other side and continued down the sidewalk.

"We're meeting up with Zayn at my house."

"Oh. Is that who you were talking to earlier?"

"Yeah. Is that alright with you? Or would you rather have some more one on one time with Mr. Styles?" He looked down at me and wiggled his eyebrows.

I giggled and shook my head. "No way!" I teased and hit him on the arm with my free hand.

"Oh please, I know you've secretly got the hots for me." He smirked to himself, only joking of course.

"Oh, yeah, you're sooo right!" I looked at him like he was the most beautiful thing, and then laughed at my sarcasm. But I won't lie, he is pretty beautiful. I've never denied that fact before.

~

When we got there, Zayn was outside the front door, smoking. "What the bloody hell were you guys doing? I've been here for ages." He mumbled as he blew smoke in my direction, smirking at me when I coughed.

"I parked a long ways away from where we were, so we had to walk all the way back to my car before we came this way." He explained, opening the door.

I followed behind him and gave William my coat. He took it and gave me a smile.

"So what now?" Harry asked.

"I just want to chill out." I told him.

He nodded his head and I followed him to the living room, Zayn trailing closely behind.

As soon as I sat down on the couch next to Harry, I pulled out my phone and started to scroll through all the updates on stuff.

"So how was she?" Harry asked Zayn, referring to the date he had last night.

"She was decent. Didn't want to do a lot of stuff though." He laid his head back.

"Ah. Was she shy?" He asked with a smile.

"Kinda. She didn't really know what she was doing. She was kind of scared it seemed."

Suddenly I understood that they weren't just talking about the date. I could be so naive sometimes.

They both chuckled and Zayn pulled out his phone. I just pretended that I didn't hear anything.

"What are you doing?" Harry asked as he leaned over dangerously close to see the screen of my phone.

I shifted slightly. "Um, nothing." I quickly put my phone away and hoped he would back off. But he didn't. He leaned against my shoulder and closed his eyes.

"Oh." Was all he said.

I stared at him for a while. His eyes were closed anyway, and I was trying to figure out if he was actually sleeping or not. He was dead quiet.

I felt a pair of eyes on me and looked up to see Zayn smirking at me. I rolled my eyes but couldn't stop the blush on my cheeks at being caught staring. I looked back at Harry. He was still showing no sign of being awake. "Harry?" I whispered.

Nothing. I studied his face closely, leaning in a bit to see if his eyes were actually open or not. It was hard to tell from my angle.

I jumped back and gasped when his eyes suddenly opened and looked at me. He started laughing at me. I scrunched up my face and hit him hard in the chest, even though it didn't hurt him. He just continued laughing.

"I totally scared you!" He pointed at me.

I crossed my arms and stuck out my tongue. "You suck!" I chuckled.

He shot me a silly smile and settled back into the couch.

"I'll be right back, I just need some fresh air after that near heart attack." I joked. Really I just needed to think for a second.

"Yeah, I know. I'm so beautiful it makes your heart stop." He joked with a smirk.

I rolled my eyes and chuckled as I got up and walked out onto the front porch. I took a big breath when I got outside and closed my eyes as I leaned against the wall. This weird feeling won't go away. I hate it. I don't know what it is, but I wish it would leave. It almost feels like I'm sick, but not quite.

I turned to look when I heard someone step outside with me.

"My, my, what a mess you've gotten yourself into." Zayn smirked as he lit up another cigarette.

I narrowed my eyes at him. "What? What are you talking about, Zayn?"

"You like Harry now too, huh? You're just no good at choosing, are you?" He teased.

"What are you talking about? I don't like Harry." I defended.

"Are you sure about that?" He questioned, puffing out a gray cloud.

I was silent for a few seconds. I actually had to stop and think about it. "Yes I'm sure!" I snapped at him. What a ridiculous accusation. I know Harry and I getting along now is weird, but we don't like each other like that.

He laughed and flicked his cigarette. "You silly girl. You don't even know it yet. But one day it will come to you. Harry gets what he wants."

I gave him a weird look. "What is that supposed to mean?" I looked him up and down.

"What do you think it means?" He asked me like I was an idiot and rolled his eyes.

"I think it means you don't know what you're talking about." I shook my head in annoyance and went back inside.

"You'll get it soon enough." He smiled to himself as I shut the door.

I walked back to the room where Harry still laid on the couch, lazily looking at his phone. "Hey Harry." I grabbed the pillow that was in my way and hit Harry with it playfully as I sat down.

He blocked the hit and laughed. "Hey, El. What's up?" He asked as he put his phone down.

"Um, can you take me home? I don't feel so well suddenly."

He knitted his brows together in concern. "I'm sorry. Are you okay?" He put his hand on my back and rubbed it sweetly.

"Yeah, I'm fine. I just want to lay down." I told him.

"Let's get you home then." He stood up with a smile and led me to his car.

The ride was nothing but a comfortable silence, although I kept feeling like he had something to tell me.

When we got there, I thanked him and went to get out of the car before he stopped me. "Wait. Can I ask you something?" He spoke with uncertainty.

"Of course. What is it?"

He fiddled with his fingers for a second before looking up at me again. "I know this is kind of weird, and I'm sure you'll say no, but, would you maybe, like to go on a date with me?" He stared at me nervously, awaiting my answer.

I was shocked into silence. That was the last thing I was expecting.

"Um, sure Harry." I mentally slapped myself. There's something wrong with me.

His face lit up with a toothy smile. "Great. This Saturday good?" He asked.

"Yeah, that's fine." I smiled back.

What am I doing? Abort! Abort!

"Alright, I'll see you later then." He smiled at me as I got out of his car and went inside.

I wonder how Niall will react when he finds out?

I'm pretty sure Niall and I were over for good. We haven't exactly said that we were, but this break we're taking, it's not so much of a break anymore. A little while turned into a long time, and a few days turned into weeks. If we haven't gotten back together by now, I doubt we ever will. But I've come to terms with it.

I didn't notice until I laid down, that this sick feeling was getting worse. I groaned in frustration and rolled over onto my stomach. I started to think about what Zayn said.

I don't like Harry. Do I? No. No way. He's just a cool friend. But wait, what if this sick feeling is actually the butterflies people talk about? Oh shit. I hope not. Surely not. I mean, it's just Harry. Sure he's hot, and cute, and even nice to me now, but he's still just Harry. Even if he does have the most gorgeous shade of green eyes, and pouty lips, and a jawline to kill for, and an adorable laugh, and so what if he looks cute talking?

Holy shit. I do like him.

Chapter Text

I finished applying my mascara and put on my brown leather boots. I checked myself in the mirror one more time.

Dark green skinny jeans, a white button up, a brown faux fur vest, and my cognac leather boots. I was satisfied with my appearance. Except my face. But there's nothing I can do about that. I smoothed myself out and heard the doorbell ring.

I could feel my nerves go wild as I couldn't help but smile. I don't know why I was so excited and nervous about this date. I mean, it's just Harry. But for some reason I couldn't calm the butterflies that raced in my stomach, and my fingertips felt tingly as I reached for the doorknob. I took a deep breath and opened the door to reveal a sexy looking Harry. He was wearing a black blazer over a white T-shirt, skinny jeans and white converse. His face was adorned with a cheeky smile as he looked me up and down.

"Hello, Eilana." He smirked at me.

"Hi Harry." I smiled back.

"You look absolutely beautiful." He complimented.

"Thank you." I blushed and tucked a strand of hair behind my ear.

"Ready to go?"

"Yeah, just let me get my coat." I held up my finger and turned around to retrieve it off of the coat rack. A pair of hands grabbed it from me and held it out for me. I smiled to myself and put it on. "Thank you Harry."

He shot me a grin and escorted me out of the house and to his car, opening the door for me. I got in and tried to get rid of the stupid grin on my face.

Why am I being like this?

We made small talk as we made our way to the restaurant. I noticed that I had never seen this place before. I didn't even know where we were.

"How come I've never seen this restaurant before?" I asked curiously.

"Because it's kind of hidden and you have to be a very big name to eat here. It's exclusive." He explained.

I nodded my head in understanding and followed behind him like a lost puppy as we were guided to a table all the way in the back, away from all the people and all the noise. "How come we're sitting back here?" I asked, looking around at the more private area of seating.

"It's where I always sit. Besides, I want to hear you talk, not other people." He grinned and pulled out my chair for me.

I raised my eyebrow at him and smirked, but I sat down eventually. "And where did you learn to be a gentleman?" I joked with him.

He chuckled and sat down. "I've always known how. I just never had anyone special enough to use it on." He winked at me and picked up the menu.

I mimicked him and looked over the food. After a while I put my menu down and looked across the table to Harry. He was staring right back at me with a small smile. We both eyed each other until we laughed. "What are we doing?" I giggled.

"Sorry, I couldn't help staring at you. You really look beautiful tonight, Eilana. It's like you're glowing with happiness." He grinned and ran a finger over his lips.

I felt myself blush again and looked down. "Well, I am really happy." I mumbled

“It's great to hear that, El. I really mean it.” He nodded his head.

I looked him in the eyes for a short while. "...Why me, Harry?" I asked, biting my lip.

He looked down in thought and furrowed his brow. "Well, I don't know when, but at some point, I fell head over heels for you and I couldn't leave you alone.” He looked at me, almost dazed in thought.

“Wait, you liked me all this time?”

“Well, yeah.” He got a little shy and looked down.

“So that would explain all that time you spent messing with me.” I mumbled out in thought.

He looked up at me and smiled nervously. “Yeah.”

I was shocked. I really thought he hated me all this time. That’s why I couldn’t believe he liked me now. But that explains a lot.

A short silence fell between us.

“But let’s not talk about that time.” He smiled at me and grabbed my hand from across the table. “Let’s talk about how lucky I am to be on a date with the most beautiful girl.”

I giggled and put my head down. “You’re not so bad yourself Mr. Styles.” I smiled back at him. “If you had told me three months ago that I would be on a date with you right now, I would have laughed until it hurt. But, here I am.” I laughed.

“Oh come on, you wouldn’t have given me even one chance back then? Not even one?” He smirked at me teasingly.

“No way.” I smirked back.

“Yeah, I thought so.” He laughed.

The waiter approached our table with a smile and upon seeing Harry, looked a bit nervous. “Good evening and welcome to The Verge, I’ll be your server for tonight. What can I get for you?” He looked at me. I told him what I wanted and he looked to Harry with a nervous smile. “And for you, sir?”

“The usual.” Was all he said as the waiter took the menus and disappeared in a flash.

“You must come here a lot.” I raised my eyebrows at him.

“Every now and then. But I like to think I’m not easily forgotten.” He smiled.

I rolled my eyes at him and laughed. “Oh, you’re not, don’t worry.”

“Hey! What is that supposed to mean?” He laughed and looked at me suspiciously.

The waiter came back with a bottle of wine and poured a glass for Harry. He turned to me, as if asking if I would like some.

“Oh, no thank you.” I put my hand up smiled politely. He left and Harry smiled at me. “What?” I asked him.

“You really don’t drink, do you?” There was a twinkle of amusement in his eye.

“No.” I answered plainly.

“You’re such a perfect little trophy child. I bet you never get into any trouble.” He narrowed his eyes at me in thought and smirked.

What’s wrong with that?” I questioned.

“Nothing. It’s just… unusual. But I like it. It’s refreshing.”

I looked at him meanly. “Are you mocking me, Harry? Are you teasing me just because I don’t live my life like you?”

He put his hands up and waved them back and forth in a dismissing manner. “No, no, I’m serious. I admire that. It takes a strong person to make a decision like that.” He grinned and I realized that he was actually complimenting me.

“Oh. Well, then thank you.” I replied in a small voice.

He chuckled at me and took a sip of his wine. “Are you sure you don’t want some?” He asked, gesturing at the wine.

“Uh, I’m sure.” I bit my lip.

“Okay then. But one of these days I’m going to get you to loosen up.” He smiled cheekily at me.

“Are you trying to corrupt me?” I giggled.

“No. I like that you’re so nice and innocent. But taking a dip in the dark water every now and again wouldn’t hurt.” He winked at me.

I scoffed and laughed at him. “You’re bad.” I joked.

“Opposites attract, right?” He smirked as he took another sip of the red liquid.

~

After dinner we went to a movie and now he was taking me back home. Although it wasn’t that late. On the way away from the theater, I saw a big sign that read mini golf. I got excited and jumped up and down in my seat like a five year old.
“Mini golf! I love mini golf! Can we go play?! Please?” I clapped my hands together and made my eyes as big as they could get.

He laughed at my behavior and smiled at me. “Of course, El. Anything you want.” He said as he pulled into the parking lot.

This was the biggest mini golf place I had ever seen. I never come to this part of town, so I didn’t know it was over here. “It’s huge!” I smiled and gazed at it in wonder. Truth is, I’m terrible at mini golf, but I still love to play.

Harry couldn’t stop chuckling as we walked inside. He set us up and I grabbed a neon green club, twirling it around like a child. This place was awesome. They had five different courses you could play, and all of them different themes. One was pirate, one was world travel, one was neon outer space, one was fairy tale, and the other was scary. I couldn’t decide which one to play.

“Which one?” I asked Harry excitedly when he finally finished paying and turned around to me.

“Whichever one you want to play.” He shrugged and took my hand.

I felt that funny feeling again but I ignored it and tried to push it to the back of my head. “How about the pirate one?”

“I think we should do the scary one.” He smiled down at me mischievously.

“No! I’m a big scaredy cat!” I protested.

“I’ll protect you.” He smiled and pulled me into him in a short hug.

I eyed him suspiciously. “Oh, I see what you’re getting at.” I giggled and wagged my finger at him disapprovingly. “I don’t think so, Mr. Styles.”

“Alright, alright. Then the pirate one it is.” He pulled me towards it and we got to the first hole. “Ladies first.” He stated.

I lined up my shot carefully and swung the club. I watched the tiny ball roll right towards the hole, but it missed it by an inch. I pouted and tapped it the short distance into the hole, fishing it out. I stood back and watched Harry get a hole in one.

“Whoa. Nice shot.” I smiled at him.

“Thanks.”

We moved on to the next one and I did the same thing, only this time I missed it by a little more. I huffed in disappointment. Meanwhile, Harry got another hole in one. I playfully glared at him and he laughed.

When we got to the third hole, I went to line up my shot and Harry interrupted me.

“Mind if I show you something?” He asked.

“Go ahead.” I told him.

He stepped up behind me and put his arms around me, grabbing my hands.

Oh no. This is like one of those stupid movies where the guy gets all close to the girl and they have some weird flirty connection. This is so cliché, but I’m sad to say that it’s working on me.

“Slide your hands down a little.” He whispered into my ear as he guided them to the right spot gently. “Now lean over like this.” He slowly pushed me forward with his chest. “And bend your knees a little.”

I bent my knees slightly, pushing myself back into him involuntarily. I hoped he wouldn’t notice me shaking slightly as I could feel his breath on my neck. I was having a hard time concentrating on anything with him so close to me. My body was freaking out at his touch. “Now what?” I swallowed nervously.

“Now, line it up and concentrate. Then shoot when you’re ready. But make sure you follow through with your swing and keep your head down.”

I could hardly register what he said. It all sounded fuzzy in my mind. I could only hear how gruff his voice sounded in my ear. “Okay.”

He guided my hands through the swing and I watched it make a hole in one. I smiled excitedly and turned around to him. “I did it!”

He smiled and I hugged him. “It’s simple, really.” He chuckled.

By the end of the match, it was actually a pretty close game but Harry beat me by five points.

“Good game.” I smiled at him. “Hey, at least I got a little better at it.”

“Yeah. Now next time, you’ll be prepared to kick my ass.” He smiled and led me back to the car, helping me in.

“Thanks Harry. That was fun.” I smiled at him as he got in the car.

“Yeah it was. I’m glad you suggested it.” He started driving and I picked up his iPod and started messing with it, running through all his music.

I didn’t even notice where we were going until we pulled up to his house. I furrowed my brow. “What are we doing here?” I asked.

“Well I thought we could hang out for a little bit before I took you home.” He smiled lightly at me and helped me out of the car. “Is that alright with you?”

“Oh, yeah.” I smiled brightly at him. I followed him inside mindlessly, going wherever he went.

We wound up in his room. “Um, I’ll be right back.” He told me as he left quickly.

I looked around the room. It was big. Really big. Too big for one person, really. The walls were gray and his giant California king bed was orange, black, and gray. All the furniture was very modern looking and most of it was black or white. Almost everything was different shades of orange, gray, black and white. It was really nice though. And very expensive looking, obviously. I noticed he had a balcony, but I didn’t bother to look out onto it. Instead, I made a straight line for the desk on the other side of the room. I looked directly at a picture sitting on it.

I picked it up and looked at it closer. It was a picture of Harry when he was younger, and he was standing with a girl that looked slightly older. She had brown hair and she favored him. I assumed it to be his sister. I had heard from other people that he had an older sister, and that they were pretty close to each other. But I think she moved away somewhere, leaving Harry alone here with his parents. I wonder what his parents were like.

I was so lost in thought, I didn’t even notice Harry come back in.

“Find something interesting?” I heard his deep voice, laced in amusement.

“Uh, sorry. I was just looking at this picture and I…” I trailed off when he leaned against the desk, facing me and took the picture from me, laying it face down on the desk.

“It’s okay.” He smiled at me. He continued to just stare.

I didn’t know what to do or what to say, so I just stood there, staring back. I started to feel a little uneasy after a few seconds and I looked down.

I felt a hand come under my chin and lift it slowly. “Why do you do that?” He asked me.

“Do what?” I asked back, confused.

“Get uncomfortable around me. Why? Is it something I’m doing?”

“No. I guess I’m just intimidated by you. You can tell?” I asked nervously, looking up at him.

“I can tell.” He chuckled. “But, there’s no reason to be uncomfortable around me. I want you to relax around me, okay?” He looked me in the eye and smiled sweetly.

I nodded my head and stayed silent. I then realized that he was leaning down. I freaked out in my head and stopped myself from jerking away out of habit. I know I’ve kissed him before, but it was different this time. I wanted it this time. I was curious to know what it was like to really kiss him. When he really meant it, it must be different. My eyelids fluttered closed as his lips came into contact with mine.

I was right, it was different. He was soft this time, gentle. It was amazing and it made the feeling in my stomach intensify. He pulled back slightly and looked at me. When he saw that I wasn’t upset, he smiled and leaned back in. I just went with it. This moment was too perfect to interrupt. His hands found their way to my lower back, while mine found their way to his curls. They were just as soft as they looked. I had to hold back a giggle as I ran my fingers through it.

He started slowly rubbing my back with one hand and holding me tight to him with the other. His lips were soft and warm. I melted into him at his skilled ways and he backed me up to his bed. He laid me down and climbed over me, reattaching our lips in the heated kiss. He began trailing butterfly kisses down my neck. He was soft at first, lightly kissing, but then he got a little more aggressive. He started to nip and suck at my most sensitive spots, making me whimper quietly at the feeling.

I started to have flashbacks of earlier times and my eyes shot open, but I calmed myself down, knowing he wouldn’t do that to me anymore and closed my eyes. I tried to push it to the back of my mind, and tried to focus on his lips upon my skin.

“Harry.” I gasped as he sucked on my collarbone. My whole body was tingling and I was starting to get very hot. I squirmed beneath him at the anxious feeling.

He smiled as he looked up and kissed my lips again. I kissed back immediately and put my hands on the back of his neck, pulling him to me. I was getting so lost in him that I didn’t notice him unbuttoning my jeans. I felt him start to tug at the fabric and I stopped immediately to look at him with question. “Whoa. Hold on, what are you doing?”

He stopped and looked at me with a thoughtful expression. “Sorry. So sorry.” He rubbed his forehead and scrunched his face before getting off of me. “I just, um, I’m-“

“Used to it?” I finished for him, giving a knowing look.

He looked at me a bit shamefully. “Uh, yeah. I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to-“

“I know. It’s okay, Harry.” I told him, sighing.

He nodded his head and looked down at his lap.

“Are girls really that easy?” I asked in curiosity.

“What?” He sounded shocked at my question.

“Are girls that easy? That they always put out on the first date?”

“Oh. Well um, yeah.” He rubbed the back of his neck and looked away.

“Wow. Classy.” I raised my eyebrows and looked around.

“I shouldn’t have touched you. Not this early on. Sorry, El.” He apologized.

I giggled at him. “It’s okay, Harry. You can still kiss me. Just, you know, don’t take it so far.” I told him.

He turned to look at me like a kid and smirked. “You liked it.” He teased.

“I never said that. I was just stating the fact that it was still alright to kiss me.” I defended.

He raised one eyebrow at me and looked at me with a disbelieving face. “Oh really?” He asked.

“Yes, really.” I rolled my eyes.

“Mm, Harry.” He over exaggeratedly imitated me in the girliest voice he had.

My cheeks went red and I threw a pillow at him. “Shut up! I did not sound like that!” I giggled.

Yeah, you did. But it was sexy.” He smirked as he came closer to me.

He slowly pushed me back down on the bed and climbed onto the bed beside me, leaning over me and kissing me sweetly again. I don’t know how long we were kissing when we both heard a loud banging sound and our heads shot up, looking around. We looked at each other with question and then we heard another one. The door to his bedroom slamming open. We both looked at it to see Louis walked through it angrily.

“What the hell are you doing in his bed?!” He stormed straight to me and grabbed me by the arm, dragging me off the bed and away from Harry. “And what the hell is she doing here with you at this hour?!” His voice boomed at Harry.

“We were just hanging out. And how in the hell did you get in here?” He shot back.

“Hanging out? Hanging out?! Is that why you two were both sitting on the bed like you were clearly kissing a minute ago?! Don’t play innocent with me Harry! I know what you’re up to! I’ve made sense of your little game!” He spat at Harry.

“What the fuck are you talking about, Tomlinson? What game? Have you gone mad? And besides, she’s not your property to go dragging away from people! I’m sure she appreciates that.” He spat sarcastically.

“You know damn well what I’m talking about! And yes, I’m sure she appreciates my protecting her innocence from dirt bags like you!” He pointed a finger, his grip still tight on me.

“What is going on?” I asked. I was so confused right now.

Why is Louis here? What is he talking about? And how did he know I was here?

“Your good person of a friend here, Eilana, is trying to trick you into thinking he’s really changed so he can get closer to you and then ruin you.” Louis explained bitterly. “You.” He pointed at Harry. “You disgust me. Did you lose your conscience completely? How can you take something so precious from someone without caring?”

I looked at Harry, shocked. I was hurt at the news. I can’t believe it.

“Don’t listen to him Eilana! He doesn’t know what he’s talking about.” Harry glared at Louis harshly, clearly angered.

“Louis what are you saying? I know he’s changed. He wouldn’t do something like that.” I shook my head, trying to convince myself of my own words. I really hoped it wasn’t true.

“He’s already gotten to you. Eilana, open your eyes! Can’t you see what he’s doing? Do you really think someone can turn around their life and their emotions that quickly? He’s just trying to get what he wants and then he’s going to go back to his old ways! He can’t be trusted.” He told me, cradling me into his side.

“Harry is that true?” I looked to him with tears in my eyes.

He stared back with sympathetic eyes. “No, Eilana. I would never do that to you. You know that. You know me, you know I’ve changed. Come on, you don’t believe him do you?” He pleaded.

I remained silent as I contemplated all of this.

“Eilana, he ruined you and I. He’s the cause for most of it. And he was using Niall to get closer to you, and it worked. He was just lying to you all this time. I hate to tell you this, but it’s true. I’m just trying to help you.” He wiped a tear from my cheek as it fell.

“Harry? Do you have anything to say?” I asked, my voice shaky.

He looked sad. “Look, that was all in the past. I really have changed now. I promise. I wouldn’t think about doing something like that to you now. I pr-“

“But it is true?” I asked again.

He sighed and ran his hand through his hair. “Yes. In the past it was true.”

I scoffed. “I’m terribly disappointed in you, Harry Styles.” I shook my head at him.

“It’s not true, Eilana! I’m trying to tell you! I’m not lying!” He pleaded once more.

Louis jumped back in and pointed a finger. “Don’t you lie to her anymore! That’s enough!”

“I’m not lying! How many times do I have to tell you?!”

“Eilana, did he not just try to sleep with you?” Louis asked knowingly.

My eyes got wide as I realized Louis was completely right. “Yes.” That was it. That was the confirmation. I broke down and cried. “Harry, how could you? I believed you. I really thought you had changed. I… I really liked you. I’m hurt. Haven’t you hurt me enough?!” I squeezed my eyes shut as Louis pulled me into his chest.

“That’s enough, Harry. Just leave her alone. You’ve done enough. I hope you’re happy with what you’ve done, because it’s pretty damn low. Even for you.” He picked me up and carried me out.

I heard Harry yell obscenities and a lot of smashing sounds as we left. Louis took me home and tucked me into bed and got in beside me, rubbing my back comfortingly. He just laid there, quietly soothing me.

He explained it all to me in the car on the way over. About Harry feeding him lies about Niall and Liam, and how Harry told Louis that he would get what he wanted out of me eventually, and all the little details in between.

I can’t believe this. I thought things were finally clearing up for me. I really liked him. I thought maybe I had figured it out, but I was wrong again. Of course. I don’t even know why I think anything could go right for me. I’m destined to be alone and sad forever. It’s just meant to be that way. At least I have Louis to comfort me. I just can’t believe that Harry would do all of that. I can’t believe I didn’t see it for myself. I’m so stupid. It was so obvious.

Looks like I’m back to square one. This just sucks. I really liked Harry. Even as just a friend. But now I’m assuming he won’t be around anymore. Not that I want him around. Louis was right, he is a dirt bag.

Chapter Text

Louis' P.O.V

Eilana hasn’t talked to Harry once since the whole incident two days ago. He would come to her house, begging to talk to her, try to explain things, but she wasn’t having it. She was heartbroken all over again. I felt horrible for her. I hated seeing her hurt. I was furious with Harry and I was going to have words with him today.

“Do you have anything to do today?” Eilana asked me as I helped her string the lights on the Christmas tree.

I was silent for a few moments, contemplating whether or not to tell her I was going to talk to Harry. “I think I’m going to talk to Harry.” I tried my hardest to sound nonchalant.

She gave me a raised eyebrow. “What? Why?” She questioned with a disgusted face. Although she seemed more mad at him than upset, I knew she was hurt. She hides it well, but I know how she is.

“Because I want to talk to him about some things. You know, hear him out. Even though I know you don’t think he deserves it, it’s only fair. And besides all this, there are some other things I would like to ask him about.” I told her honestly.

She put her hands on her hips as she stood back to observe the tree so far. “What could you possibly have to talk to him about? Do you two have history or something?”

“Uh, yeah you could say that.” I responded as I made circles around the tree in her living room.

“Oh. Well just don’t take his shit talk. He’s pretty good at lying. Believe me I know.” She snarled at no one as she crossed her arms.

I sighed lightly at her unhappiness. “Don’t worry about it, love. Like I said, I’m going to have a talk with him. Just try to stop thinking about it if you can.” I told her.

“How can I just, forget about it? He practically ruined my holiday season. I really liked him and I thought he liked me, and to find out that the person you like doesn’t like you back, that they only want to use you, it hurts. A lot. I mean, he really had me going, Louis! I was such a fucking fool! Thank the heavens I have you!” She ranted, coming over with arms wide to hug me.

I held her to me gently, swaying back and forth slowly as I placed a kiss atop her head. It hurt to hear her say that. That she liked him. It pained me terribly. But I can’t show it, because I have to be here for her.

Does she not even realize that I’m dying to be with her?

I never stopped loving her. Not even a little bit. As the days have passed, I only love her more. This whole time, my love is growing, and it hurts more and more. The only thing that keeps me sane is her happiness. I can at least be this close to her again.

“It’s going to be okay, love. I’ll make sure you have a wonderful Christmas and we’ll do lots of fun stuff together and it’ll be good. You’ll see.” I smiled brightly at her and tried to lift her mood.

Her eyes sparkled up at me as she grinned slightly, tears in her eyes. “Thanks, Lou-Bear. You’re the best. Don’t ever change.”

I was experiencing déjà vu as I reached down and tapped her nose with my finger, smiling at her. “Never.”

We chuckled and I kissed her on the cheek. “I love you, Eilana.” I looked at her with adoration in my eyes.

“I love you too, Lou. Forever.” She reached up on her tiptoes and pecked me on the cheek.

My whole body warmed at the feeling of her lips on me again. I missed that so much. Such an innocent action, but oh how I missed even the simplest of affection from her.

I looked at the clock on the wall behind her. 2:31pm. I had spent all day so far at her house helping her decorate for Christmas.

“I think I need to go. But I’ll be right back over, okay? We’ll get it done today, I promise.” I smiled at her and plugged in the lights on the tree, lighting it up.

I looked up and saw the excitement and amazement in Eilana’s smiling face. I stepped back to admire it myself. It was undecorated with just the lights on it, but there was still something about it that was beautiful. I felt a little like a kid again. I smiled to myself and hugged Eilana from the side, grabbing my jacket and planting another kiss on her cheek before I left.

“I’ll be back in a bit, love.” I called out to her as I exited the house, hopping into my car and going directly towards Harry’s house. If there was still any of the old Harry left, that’s where he would be.

I didn’t know exactly what I was going to say to him, but I knew what I felt and I knew it would come out right when the time came. I’ve never been happier than to have Eilana back. I want to see her happy after all I put her through. I’m going to be more understanding and I’m going to let her make her own decisions. This time around, I’m going to do everything I can to protect her. And I’ll be damned if I let Harry hurt her any more than he already has.

Upon arriving, I walked straight up to the front door to be greeted by William. “Ah, Mr. Tomlinson. Good to see you again. You left so quickly the other day, I didn’t get to say goodbye. Please, come in.” He stepped to the side and gestured me in with a bow.

“Is Harry here?”

“Yes, Master Harry is in at the moment. Would you like me to inform him of your arrival?”

“No thanks, William. I’ll just go up and see him. Thank you.” I waved back at him as I climbed the staircase.

I knocked on Harry’s bedroom door and waited for an answer.

“What do you want?” I heard his gruffly upset voice muffled from the other side of the door.

“Open the damn door, Harry.” I commanded strongly.

There was silence and then the clicking of the lock as the door knob twisted. Harry was soon revealed with a very annoyed look upon his face as he stared at me in question.

“What the hell do you want?” He spat at me.

“I came to talk to you, hear you out even. So if there’s something you want Eilana to know, you should tell me now. Or are you incapable of telling the truth anymore?” I spat back.

He looked annoyed as his eyes skimmed past me to search for other party members only to find I was alone. He looked to the side with an uncaring expression as he nodded me into his room.

He closed the door behind us. “Doubting that you’re right about all of this, Tomlinson?” He asked with a smug grin as he turned around.

“Actually, I’ve been thinking about it a lot, and yeah, I am. But I can admit that I’m wrong sometimes. Something you probably don’t remember how to do.” I laughed sarcastically.

He gave me a rude look and huffed. “Oh really? Because I admitted to Eilana that I was wrong about the way I treated her this whole time. But thanks to you and your assumptions, it was all for naught.” He crossed his arms over his chest and leaned back slightly.

“Well can you blame me? You, who have been so terrible to her forever, suddenly treating her with the utmost respect and sincerity? Of course that looks suspicious. Not to mention all the things you told me that, surprise, turned out to be lies. And then you went as far as to tell me that you were going to get her, no matter the cost. Yeah, I was pretty damn sure you were up to some horrible shit. And as of right now, it looks like I’m still right.”

He laughed. “Alright, I’ll give you that. It does look suspicious. But maybe if you could take my word for once, you would see that I’m not lying about any of this!”

“Well, you’ll excuse me for not believing you! You haven’t been an honest person since that day years ago when you told me you didn’t need me. I took your word then didn’t I? I believed you then. But after that? Oh no, I lost all respect for you. For a long time, there was a part of me that wanted to believe that there was still some good in you. But after years of trying to see it, there was never any sign of it. Not one, Harry. I watched for it, and it never came. I gave up, but then Eilana came along. She was the spark to my fire, and I loved her immediately. She was the most special person to me, and I swore by my life to protect her from dicks like you. But of course you interfered. You had to, because you just couldn’t stand that I was happy with my life and you weren’t because you were living a shitty one, doing shitty things that you thought were cool. But truthfully, they left you empty, didn’t they? Oh yes, I noticed, Harry. You saw what good Eilana was and you couldn’t leave her alone. You saw something in her, something that drew you to her. Happiness. You wanted it, and she had it. Only you didn’t realize that yet. I’ve been far more observant of your life than you realized. You want to know why? Because despite you treating me like fucking dirt on the bottom of your shoe, there’s still a part of me that cares about you as a friend and as a brother. But don’t think that I won’t do anything to protect Eilana against you.”

Harry stood speechless. His eyes were wide and his expression stunned. He opened his mouth but nothing came out.

“Surprised?” I asked, sarcasm dripping from the word.

“I-I had no idea, Louis. I don’t even know where to begin. You… still care about me?” He asked, eyes growing sad. It was like seeing young Harry again.

I scoffed. “Well I don’t fucking hate you if that’s what you think.”

“This is so good to hear. Louis, I don’t hate you. I mean at first, for a while I thought I did. But after some time, I realized that I regretted what I had done to you. I felt horrible about it, but I felt that it was too late to take it back. I thought you hated me…” His gaze dropped to the cold wood floor.

“Well unlike you, I don’t just go hating people I once loved. You were the only real friend I had until Eilana. Everyone is so fake. I really missed you honestly. That is until Eilana came along. I got over it. But yes, there’s still a part of me that misses the brother I always wanted.” I confessed, feeling a bit emotion myself. I wasn’t planning for this to happen. It’s taken me completely off guard.

He looked up at me with hopeful eyes. “Honestly, I still miss you, Louis. You’re right, everyone is fake. I have Zayn, Niall, and Liam, but they’re still not the same as we used to be.”

We both looked down, not knowing what to say right now. This was clearly shocking to us both.

He finally spoke up. “Look, believe me or not, I really do care about Eilana. I know it seems impossible and it’s weird, but it did happen. I really, really do care for her. And I understand you wanting to do everything to protect her. I feel the same way. I really think that she’s changed me back to myself. She’s pulled something out of me that I can’t control. But it’s a good thing. It’s a little scary to me because I’m not used to it, but I’m grateful. I’m finally happy. Or I was anyway. I feel awful about what I did to her. It wasn’t my intention. I promise you that I didn’t mean her any harm. I know I said those things in the past, but I really have changed. I just wish it was easier for people to see that. I don’t know how to make it obvious without appearing suspicious. I swear on my life I mean her no ill intent. You have my word. I know you probably don’t want to hear this, but I do like her. And I will continue to pursue her if she’ll have it. I mean this in no annoyance or challenge to you, it is simply out of my like for her, nothing more.”

I could tell he was being honest and sincere. I could tell that he was a better person. It was almost like having the old Harry back. It made me smile internally. “You’re serious.” It was a statement more than a question. “You really have changed, Harry.” I studied him in shock. I had given up hope that this would ever happen.

“You mean… you believe me?”

I laughed lightly in disbelief. “Yeah, I do. And I apologize for accusing you of all this. But I’m sure you can understand.”

“Of course I do. Thanks, mate.” He nodded his head in approval as a small grin formed across his lips. “So, does this mean we’re like, friends again or something?” He asked, his grin now a playful smile.

I smiled back. “I think that’s long overdue, buddy.”

He chuckled and walked towards me, giving me a brotherly hug. “I missed you, mate.” He chuckled.

“I missed you too. I’m glad you finally came to your senses, Harry.”

“I know we’ve already forgiven each other and all but, I just want to say that I’m sorry for what I said to you that day. You know, that I didn’t need you. I was wrong. Only, I realized it after it was too late. And, I’m really sorry.” He patted my back.

I smiled at him. “Apology accepted. Don’t worry about it, mate. And it’s never too late to apologize for something. Never.”

He nodded in agreement. “What are we going to do about Eilana?”

“What do you mean? I’m going to tell her the truth and she’ll make up her own mind about how she wants to treat you after that.” I told him.

“Are we going to tell her about our past?”

“I don’t know. Maybe. If she asks about it.”

“I just hope she takes all of this well. I hope she believes it.”

“Would you like to join me in telling her?” I offered. I wasn’t sure it was the best idea, but I thought it was the right thing to do.

“I would. I want to be there.” He looked nervous.

He grabbed a coat and we took off towards Eilana’s house. When we got there, I told him to wait outside. I walked in and greeted Eilana. She was putting random decorative items around the house.

“Hello, love.” I hugged her from behind and she turned around in my arms smiling.

“How did it go?” She asked.

“Well, about that.” I started.

“What?” Her voice got low and she had a questioning look upon her face.

“I have quite a bit to tell you.”

~

Eilana’s P.O.V

“So, you’re telling me that Harry and you used to be best friends, and then you weren’t, and then I came along, and he was bad at first, but then he isn’t anymore, and now he’s telling the truth, and you two are friends again because he’s his old self?” I tried to remember it all as I recalled what Louis had just told me.

“Pretty much.” He grinned nervously, waiting for my response. I was a little blank faced at the moment.

“…Oh. So, I should just forgive him and move on? I still like him you know?” I gave him a confused face.

“Well, you don’t have to move on. But you should at least forgive him. He really didn’t do anything bad to you. He still likes you in fact.” I looked at the floor as his words sunk in.

There was a small part of me that felt bad for misjudging him.

“If you’re going to blame anyone, blame me. I’m pretty much the entire reason for this and I’m sorry.” He told me.

I rolled my eyes and laughed. “Louis, I’m not going to blame you. But I’m not going to blame Harry either. It was nothing but a big misunderstanding.” I explained.

“Then in that case, I have something for you.” He got up from the kitchen table and walked out of my house, confusing me.

He came back in with Harry and my eyes widened and my cheeks flushed pink. “Oh, Harry.”

“Hi, El.” He waved at me in a small manner. “I’m sorry about all of thi-“

“No. I’m the one who should be apologizing. I knew that you had changed. I’m sorry for doubting you.” I stuttered out.

“It’s okay. To be fair, I totally understand Louis’ suspicion. I don’t blame him. But, everything is better than ever now, so in a way, thanks I guess.” He laughed, looking at Louis.

“I can’t believe you two used to be best friends. I would have never guessed. Louis, when you said you two had history earlier, I never imagined this was what you were talking about.” I giggled.

“Can I have an apology hug?” Harry asked with a sly grin.

I rolled my eyes as my lips formed an upward curve. “Of course, curly.” I hugged him back and tousled his mop of curls.

“Me too?” I heard Louis from behind me. I turned to look at him, a hopeful grin on his face.

“But you-Never mind.” I shrugged and gave him a hug too. “So now I’m going to have to deal with you two getting along? That sounds like hell to be honest.” I laughed to myself.

They smirked at each other. “It is.” Louis replied.

Harry bit his lip and looked at me. “Can I talk to you?” He asked me.

“Of course.” I smiled.

I let him lead me away to another room. “Um, well, I still like you. I was wondering if you would still be interested in keeping up this dating thing?”

“I like you too, Harry. But I’m not so sure that I should date you yet. I also really don’t want to rush into anything. If you can convince me that I should date you, then you may take me on another date.” I giggled.

He smirked at me with a raised brow and kissed me on the cheek. “This is going to be fun.” He whispered in my ear before walking out.

Oh, shit. What have I gone and done now?

Chapter Text

"That should be it for now. I've already got you guys presents, so I think I’m done." I told Liam and Zayn as we walked through the mall.

We were all shopping for Christmas presents for our parents. With Christmas four days away, we were rushing around to finish things up because we're all procrastinating teenagers.

"Great. I think we're all done here then." Liam smiled and took the shopping bag from me.

I smiled and looked behind us only to realize that it had become just me, Liam, and Zayn. I furrowed my brow as I stopped and searched for the other three. "Where are Louis, Niall, and Harry?" I asked them.

"I think I've found them." Zayn said, pointing to the lingerie store beside us.

I rolled my eyes and walked into the store. They were making a scene to the left of me. Harry had a bra on and he was pretending to be a girl, Louis had a thong on over his jeans and he was putting a bra on Niall’s head.

I walked over to them quickly and snatched the bra from Niall’s head, putting it back. “Are you guys serious? You’re all eight year olds.” I laughed at them as they put the stuff back. They all laughed and we walked out to join the other two again.

“Are we done here or what?” Harry asked.

“Yeah we’re done.” I confirmed.

“Can we get dinner now?” Louis whined, putting his arm around me as we walked out of the mall.

“Yes, Lou.” I ruffled his hair.

~

“Can I get you guys anything else?” The blonde waitress asked cutely.

“No thanks.” Liam replied politely.

She walked away, swaying her hips in an exaggerated manner. I caught Zayn looking, but he was the only one. I rolled my eyes and laughed quietly to myself. “I see you, you know?” I teased.

He looked at me with a smirk. “And? Would you rather me look at you?” He asked cheekily.

“Hell no. Please continue.” I laughed and took a sip of my drink.

I was seated next to Harry, Niall was across from me, and Zayn was sitting next to Niall, while Liam and Louis sat at the two ends of the table. We were all being loud and rambunctious as usual. Although Harry wasn’t talking to me very much since we got here.

“Don’t you agree?” Louis suddenly asked me.

I had no idea what he was talking about. “What?” I asked him, looking around.

“Don’t say it.” Niall warned me. “He’s a liar.” He loudly whispered.

“What? What are you guys talking about?” I laughed.

“She just doesn’t want to hurt your feelings, Niall.” Louis made a fake sympathetic face at him.

Niall scoffed. “That’s what you think.”

“Guys! What are you going on about?” I silenced them both.

“Louis here, said he’s better with the ladies than me. Clearly he’s crazy.” Niall taunted, smirking at him.

I laughed. “You can’t be serious? You’re both very good with the ladies.” I told them.

“But which one is better?” Louis demanded.

They both leaned in to hear me. “Neither. You’re equal in my opinion. It really comes down to a matter of the girls taste.”

“You’re supposed to say that I’m better!” Louis whined.

“Oi, quit your yapping. Apparently you just aren’t as good as you thought you were. Deal with it.” Niall smirked and took a sip of his beer.

“You two are ridiculous.” I shook my head and grinned. I almost choked on my drink when I felt something run up my thigh slowly. I realized it was Harry’s hand. I quickly put my drink down and tried to breathe after all the coughing.

Everyone looked at me in concern. “Are you okay?” Liam asked.

I put my hand up and nodded my head, smiling slightly. “I’m fine.” I croaked out.

They all went back to what they were doing, but not without looking at me strangely first. I swallowed and took a deep breath. Harry’s hand was still resting on my leg. I turned my head slightly to look at him. He smirked at me and looked away, grabbing his drink as if nothing was going on.

My breath caught in my throat when his hand started to inch its way up again. My intake of breath was shaky and my hands were trembling as I reached for my glass. I’m not going to lie, I was enjoying it. I liked Harry after all, and I didn’t have much of a problem with it. I was just shocked he would do this here, in front of everyone. Although the fact that we could be caught made it more exciting.

Still his hand slowly trailed up my leg. He stopped on my upper thigh and squeezed gently. My heartbeat quickened and my whole body warmed up at his touch. He wasn’t even looking at me, but he had an ever so slight smirk upon his face. He slid his hand to my inner thigh, pulling my legs apart slowly. I made a quiet squeaking sound and hit the underside of the table with my hand when I tried to grab his hand quickly, causing a loud banging noise.

Everyone looked to me once more with confused faces. “Are you sure you’re okay?” Louis asked, reaching out to brush the hair from my eye.

I smiled and nodded, scared to open my mouth right now. I bit my lip and looked down. I heard Harry chuckle quietly to himself. I noticed Niall looking at Harry suspiciously.

Oh no, I hope he doesn’t know. That would be awkward.

Harry continued to rub small circles on the inner thigh. I was dead quiet as everyone went about their conversation. Even Harry was conversing like normal. I felt something gently hit my shin. I looked up to see Niall staring at me with furrowed eyebrows. He looked to Harry and then back to me, as if asking me what was going on. I shook my head like it was no big deal and looked away, hoping he would let it go.

I was too focused on trying to act nonchalant that I didn’t notice Harry’s hand moving. By the time I realized his hand was between my legs, it was too late. I felt his palm brush harshly against me. I muffled a whimper and shot up abruptly, almost knocking my chair over.

Once again, all eyes were on me. “What is going on with you?” Niall asked.

“Yeah, what’s wrong Eilana?” Harry asked me, slipping me a smirk when no one was looking.

What a sly little fox. He thinks he’s smooth, huh?

“Um, I’ll be right back.” Was all I got out before walking towards the bathrooms.

I leaned against the sink as I breathed deeply.

Well, that was sufficiently awkward. And I have to sit next to him through the whole meal? This is not going to work. I’m going to choke on my food and die.

My whole face was red as I stared at it in the mirror.

I just really hope Niall doesn’t know. Something tells me that Zayn probably knows. I wouldn’t be surprised.

I straightened myself out and walked out the door. I let out a shriek that was cut short by a hand when someone grabbed me.

“Shh! It’s only me.” I recognized Harry’s voice in my ear.

He pulled me back into the corner of the hallway we were standing in. “What are you doing here?” I asked him.

“They didn’t know where you were going so I told them I would follow you.” He explained, shrugging his shoulders. “Too much for you?” He wiggled his eyebrows at me.

I scoffed at him and put my hand on my hip. “It’s a little much in public, don’t you think?”

“No. As long as we don’t get caught, there’s nothing wrong with it.” He smirked at me, green eyes sparkling with excitement.

“No way. Not in front of the other guys.” I said, raising my finger to him.

He pouted and closed in on me. “But it’s more fun that way.” He smiled as he towered over me. He took a strand of my hair between his fingers. “It’s exciting. I know you feel the same way.” He raised his brow at me.

I slapped his hand away lightly and walked back towards the table, Harry trailing behind me like a lost puppy. “Just keep your hands to yourself for now.” I warned him.

We made it back to the table and sat down. “Everything good?” Louis asked.

“Yeah, just fine.” I smiled at them. Niall gave me a disbelieving look but I shrugged it off.

“Here you are.” The screeching voice of the waitress said as she placed the food in front of us.

I thanked her as she set mine down. She winked at Zayn when she gave him his. He returned the gesture and she walked off. I laughed to myself.

“Something funny?” He asked me.

“Just you and your never ending flirt-fest.” I rolled my eyes as I popped a french fry in my mouth.

~

I set my stuff down on the kitchen counter and grabbed a water from the refrigerator. We decided to hang out at Liam’s for the night. “What are we doing?” I asked.

“Whatever we want to do. Find something and do it.” Zayn replied.

I narrowed my eyes at him as I took a sip of water. “Thank you, Zayn.” I said sarcastically.

He faked a smile and returned to his phone.

“I just thought we would chill, laze around. Whatever you want.” Liam told me with a smile.

I nodded my head and leaned against the counter. My mind kept wandering back to Harry’s attempt at the restaurant. I hated to admit that I liked it. Or liked him. How did this even happen I wonder. I don’t get how I can go from hating someone, to being excited by that person. It makes zero sense to me.

“Well I’m going to game it up if anyone wants to join me.” Niall announced as he left the kitchen.

“I’ll join you.” Louis said, following behind.

“I’ve got something to do. I’ll be right back. I’ll just be in my room if anyone needs me.” Liam said as he left.

Zayn walked out without a word. I looked to a grinning Harry. “What?” I asked him, sounding unenthusiastic.

“And what are you going to do to entertain yourself?” He asked as he stepped toward me.

“I’m not going to give you the answer you want, Harry.” I couldn’t help the smirk that grew on my face. Knowing that he wanted me was amusing.

He tilted his head to the side as he pinned me to the counter. “And what do you think it is that I want?”

“Well I know it’s something dirty no doubt.” I answered, trailing my fingers up his arm.

He grabbed my hand quickly and looked me in the eyes intensely. He brought it to his lips and softly kissed it, never breaking eye contact.

“Well, aren’t you suddenly a charmer?” I giggled.

“Suddenly? What do you mean suddenly?” He smirked at me.

“I mean, you haven’t exactly been too charming in the past. Does that come as a surprise to you?”

“No. I see your point. But what about now? Are you saying I’m not charming at all times?” He brought his fingertips up to my face, slowly tracing my jaw.

“You’re right. When you had that bra on earlier, it was pretty charming.” I teased.

He chuckled and lifted my chin with his fingers. “I know it. And I don’t even have to try.” He joked.

I rolled my eyes and smiled. “You’re insane.”

He smiled as he pressed his lips to mine. I wrapped my arms around his neck and played with his hair. Kissing him was a weird feeling, but it was a good feeling. He held me close with an arm wrapped around my waist. His other hand was placed under my chin, holding my face gently. He broke the kiss and looked around quickly. He grabbed me by the hand and led me to another room. He opened the door to reveal that it was the laundry room. He closed the door behind us and lifted me up, setting me on the washing machine.

“What are we doing in here?” I whispered.

“Privacy.” He mumbled before brushing the hair off my neck. He kissed me behind my ear and slowly worked his way down. I gripped the washing machine beneath me and rolled my head back. Doing this with him was wrong to me, but I couldn’t reject his touches. He clearly knew what he was doing.

He pulled the sleeve of my shirt to the side and sucked on my shoulder, earning a whimper from me. He gently nibbled at the sensitive skin and tangled one of his hands into my hair. I moaned as his tongue ran over the area. I was probably going to have a mark, but I couldn’t care less at the moment.

“You taste sweet.” He mumbled as he pressed his forehead against mine, smiling at me.

I giggled and took the moment to kiss him. He seemed a little surprised at my action but he responded to it. We both smiled into the kiss and giggled when we parted.

Then the door swung open. We both looked to see Zayn standing there, looking rather unimpressed with everything as usual. He raised one brow and looked between us. “You know I can hear you guys?”

Harry and I looked at each other and started laughing. “And?” Harry said.

“Well I don’t give a fuck. Just didn’t know if maybe you cared about anyone else hearing you two.” He looked at me pointedly and walked away, shutting the door behind him.

I suddenly felt a little guilty for some reason. I didn’t have anything to feel guilty for. My gaze dropped to the floor anyway.

Harry sighed and put his hands on either side of me, leaning against the washer. “What’s wrong?” He asked.

“Nothing. I just… feel bad for doing this.” I told him.

He gave me a confused look. “Why? There’s nothing wrong with it. We’re just having a bit of fun. You don’t have anyone to answer to. So what’s the big deal? Loosen up a little.”

I looked up at him with narrowed eyes. “I know that. But don’t tell me to loosen up. Clearly I have. And I may not have a reason to feel this way, but I do. That’s something I can’t help. I never said I was going to stop fooling around with you, so chill out.” I told him, crossing my arms. His reaction really pissed me off.

“Alright, shit. Sorry. Just trying to help you…” He mumbled, putting his hands up in defense.

“Trying to help me? By doing what? Telling me I’m a stiff? I think you’re more concerned with helping yourself. That is not how you help someone, Harry.”

“Well I’m not the best at helping people. So I’m sorry for the poor attempt. I still tried. Doesn’t that count? I don’t see why you’re so pissed at me for trying to help you, whether or not it worked.”

I scoffed. “And it’s still about you. What a surprise. I’m the one that feels bad here, and you’re concerned about yourself.” I laughed sarcastically.

He knitted his brows together in anger and confusion. “You’re over reacting.” He said as he fixed his hair.

“Maybe I am! But you’re not helping!” I raised my voice slightly. I was only feeling worse with this ongoing bickering.

“Then I’ll just leave you alone in your so called guilt. Would that be better?” He asked sarcastically.

“Yes! It would.” I glared at him.

He put his hands up above his head and dropped them, walking out.

I huffed once I was alone and put my face in my hands. This was not at all how I was expecting this situation to turn out. I wasn’t even sitting there for two minutes before I heard footsteps. I looked up to see Zayn stroll through the door casually.

“Well, that was an interesting end to you guys little session.” He leaned against the wall opposite me, crossing his arms.

I looked up at him. “You heard all of that?”

He smirked and nodded his head. “Oh yes.”

“Fuck.” I hung my head.

“What was the cause for that? Your guilt I mean.” He asked.

“I don’t even know. I really don’t think anyone would care, so why do I feel like I would be hurting someone?”

He stared at me for a moment. “Are you so sure that no one would be affected if they found you two like that?”

I pondered the thought. “Well, no. I’m not sure. But even if they were, there’s no reason that what I’m doing is wrong. They would understand.” I bit my lip.

“I’m sure they would. But you would still be hurting them. Would you be willing to risk hurting that person anyway?” He asked.

I looked at the pattern on the floor as I thought about what I already knew. “No. I don’t want to hurt anyone.” I told him.

He nodded his head. “Well, there you go. That’s why you feel the guilt. You do have a reason to feel it. It has nothing to do with what’s right and wrong, but more to do with who you would be hurting.” He explained.

I sighed in frustration. “You’re right.” I realized. “I just-I want to do the things I want without feeling bad about it and I can’t because there’s always someone watching and it’s frustrating.”

“I know. But that’s the decision you have to make. Would you rather have what you want and feel guilty, or miss out on some things and not hurt the ones you love. I know it sucks, but it’s part of life sometimes.” He stared blankly at me.

I nodded my head and smiled slightly to myself. “Thanks, Zayn. You’ve been more help than Harry.” I rolled my eyes at the thought. “I needed someone to talk to, so thanks for being there.” I smiled at him.

His eyes got wide and he stood up straight. “Hey, woah. I was not trying to help you. I was just interested in what happened. Don’t take this as me caring for you or anything like that.” He cleared his throat and looked around frantically.

“I know. But thank you anyway. Sometimes the person we need isn’t the person closest to us.” I hopped off of the washer and walked out, joining the boys in the living room.

Niall, Louis, and Liam were all here, but there was no sign of Harry. “Where is Harry?” I asked Liam as I sat down next to him on the couch.

“He’s somewhere around here. I think I saw him walk out on the back porch a few minutes ago.” He said.

“Oh.” I leaned back on the couch and looked through the windows on the other side of the room, hoping to see Harry. He wasn’t anywhere in sight though. He must have walked out farther than I can see.

Zayn walked in a few minutes later, sitting down diagonal me in the chair. He gave me a quick look, catching my eyes. He quickly looked away and pretended not to care. But I could tell he felt awkward from earlier. I laughed quietly to myself and averted my attention to the video game on the giant television.

A few minutes later, the sound of the door closing was heard. I saw Harry walk in from the backyard. He caught my gaze and came over and sat next to me like nothing had happened. He even smiled at me when he sat down. I gave him a weird look, but he just put his arm around me and gave me a cheesy smile. I raised my eyebrow at him and he looked at me confused.

“What?” He asked, clueless.

“Nevermind.” I said simply. Did he just drop what happened earlier completely or? I was beyond confused by him. I thought he was pretty upset earlier when he left. Or at least it seemed that way.

“So what do you guys say we go clubbing tomorrow night?” Harry suggested.

“Sounds good to me. I haven’t been in a good while.” Liam responded.

“Yeah, sounds like a plan. I’ll make a holy show of myself on the dance floor.” Niall laughed.

“Clubbing?” I repeated with worry.

“Yeah. What? Doesn’t sound like fun to you?” Harry asked.

“It sounds like trouble.” I stated.

“Aaa, it’ll be alright. Come on, you’ve got to come with us.” Harry pleaded.

I sighed and looked up. “Fine. But I’ll probably just sit there the whole time.” I told them honestly.

“Fine by me.” Zayn commented.

“Shut up, Zayn.” I laughed.

“Fine by me.” He laughed.

“It’s going to be fun, you’ll see.” Harry smiled at me.

Hopefully not too much fun. I’m not too confident that these boys will stay out of trouble in a place full of drunks. Especially if they get drunk as well. I do not want to witness this scene.

Chapter Text

"I like the black dress better." Louis commented from my bed as I twirled in front of the mirror.

Louis had been at my house all day, hanging out and enduring my forever ongoing rant of what I was going to wear to the club tonight. I couldn't decide between my dark blue blouse and jeans, or my black dress.

I sighed and stuck my hip out, tilting my head to look at my reflection. "But I'm not comfortable in it." I told him for the hundredth time.

"And I don't know why. You look great in it." He looked at me with a serious expression. "Look, it's a club, it's going to be dark and there's going to be so many people that you won't even be able to see your own shoes. It's not going to matter that much." He told me.

"I know, Lou. But I'm just not used to this kind of stuff. You know I've always been a shut in. This whole social thing freaks me out. I want to wear something comfortable. I'm just going to sit there all night anyway." I huffed. "Why am I even going to this again?" I asked.

"Because we told you to and you love us." He raised an eyebrow at me through the mirror. "Especially me." He gave me a silly smile.

I giggled at him and turned around. "Of course, Louis. You're the most special to me, and you always will be." I gave him a sweet hug. Although because he was sitting down, his face came about breast level with me. His eyes got wide and he rubbed his face on my cleavage like a kid. "Louis!" I shrieked and popped him lightly on the back of the head, laughing.
He chuckled and made a squeezing motion in the air with his hands. "You are twelve I swear it."

"Only kidding, love. Just pick something. You'll look gorgeous in whatever you wear." He told me, trying to quicken the process.

"But that's just the problem, I think I look bad in both."

"Well, you don't. Rest assured of that. Just wear the black dress, okay? Please? For me?" He gave me his best puppy look.

“Why are you so intent on me wearing the dress?” I looked at him weird.

“Because I think it looks really good on you and you never wear it.” He said, shrugging his shoulders.

I raised my brow at him. “So you want me to wear it so you can stare at me in it?” I asked with a smirk.

He smiled cheekily. “Basically.”

I rolled my eyes and pulled it back out of the closet. “For you.” I told him. “But just this once. I don’t even know why I have this dress. I would never wear something like this.” I changed into it, fully aware of Louis’ wandering eyes. But I didn’t much mind, he’s just a boy and boys will stare.

“Because I bought it for you, remember?”

I walked over to the mirror and looked at myself. I couldn’t believe I was going to wear this. It was really short and low cut, and it had cutouts on the front and on the sides above my waist. I looked at myself in it and made a weird face. “Are you sure, Lou?”

He got up and walked to me, hugging me from behind. “Yes, I’m sure. You look gorgeous in it. Just remind me not to drool.” He joked with a smile.

I hit his arm and walked over to my vanity. “Thanks?” I laughed.

I applied more makeup than usual since we were going clubbing after all. Might as well. I put some stuff in my hair to make it more voluminous and big and left it curly. “What time is it? I thought the guys would be here by now.” I asked him.

He looked down at his phone for a second. “8:37. They should be here any minute.” He said.

“Louis, I’m nervous. Maybe I shouldn’t go.” I told him as I stood up.

He laughed at me and pulled me into a hug. “Why are you nervous, love? It’s just a club. I’ll stay with you the whole night if you want me to, okay? Don’t worry about it.” He kissed my forehead and smiled down at me.

“I know, but I’m not used to being around so many people and what if I get lost or something, or what if you get drunk, you’ll leave me then and-“

He held my face in his hands. “I’m not going to leave you. I promise.”

I nodded my head and hugged him. “…I feel like a skank in this dress.” I laughed.

“Eilana, it’s a club. That dress is definitely on the more conservative side. But you look sexy in it.” He smirked.

There was suddenly loud banging on the front door and constant ringing of the doorbell. I sighed and went to the door, Louis trailing behind me. I opened it and saw the rest of the boys standing there. “Finally. I thought we were going to be out here forever. And by the way, you look really sexy.” Harry said, grinning as he shamelessly looked me up and down.

“It was only like a minute, and thank you but could you not do that? It makes me really uncomfortable.” I told him.

He stepped inside and hugged me, followed by Liam, who also gave me a hug. “You look stunning.” He told me. Always the gentleman.

“Hi Niall.” I waved and laughed at him as he still stood in the doorway with his jaw hanging open.

“What are you wearing?! I’ve never seen that dress! How come you don’t wear that everyday? It’s… wow.” He came in and hugged me, cheekily grabbing my ass.

I giggled and swatted his hand away. “Hey! No no!” I laughed. “Hey Zayn.” I waved to him. He was leaned up against the wall outside, smoking.

He lifted his hand and barely waved back to me, not even looking.

I guess he’s being moody tonight.

“Are we ready? Where’s Louis?” Harry asked.

I turned around, confused. “He was here a minute ago.” I walked down the hall to find him in the kitchen. “You ready, Lou-Bear?”

He was getting his phone from the counter. “Yeah.” He followed me out and we all piled into Harry’s Range Rover.

When we got there, there was a giant line outside. I thought there was no way we were getting in, but we walked right up to the door and they let us right in after seeing Harry.

“What was that about?” I asked Niall.

“His dad owns this place.” He said.

Oh. I should have known.

I followed them to a table in the back. Louis, Liam and I sat down, the rest headed straight for the bar.

“Are you going to get drunk?” I asked Louis.

“No. Not if you don’t want me to.” He smiled at me sweetly.

“It’s okay. I mean, I want you to have a good time.” I told him.

“Well, I’m not getting drunk. So you’ll have me at least.” Liam chimed from across the table.

I smiled at him and nodded. “Good. See Louis? It’ll be alright.” I patted him on the arm. I’ve never seen Louis drunk before, but I’m sure it’s not that different.

The guys got back with their drinks and sat down. Niall slid in next to me. “Do you want anything? I didn’t think to ask you before. A water or something?” He asked

“No thanks. I’m fine, Ni.” I smiled at him.

“Okay then.” He shrugged. “But you’ll want some later after you’ve been dancing.”

“What? Nuh uh, I’m not dancing. My ass is not moving from this seat all night.” I laughed.

“Um, yes you are. Come on, you have to! It’ll be fun!” He told me.

“Nope. You guys told me to come with you, you never said anything about dancing.”

“But it’s a club, El. You have to dance! It’s the whole point!”

“No.” I said simply.

“Not even with me?” Niall asked.

I thought for a second. “…Maybe later.”

He wiggled his eyebrows and turned his attention to the dance floor.

“You love dancing.” Louis said.

“I don’t even know how to dance really.” I told him.

“But you always used to dance with me.” He pointed out.

“Oh yeah. Well that’s different. You were the only one around.” I tapped his nose.

He rolled his eyes and put his arm around me. “You’re so silly.”

As the night progressed, Harry and Niall were consuming more and more drinks. I was getting a little concerned about when they were going to stop. If they planned to at all. Even Liam had a drink or two, but I think he was done. I was surprised that Zayn wasn’t drinking as much. Louis had started to drink at this point. Already on his third drink. I could sense that he was getting a bit tipsy.

It was just me, Louis, and Liam at the table right now. Everyone else had wandered off a while ago.

I noticed Harry approaching the table. He sat down and took a big breath. “It’s really sick tonight!” He smiled.

I raised my eyebrow at him. “Are you drunk?” I crossed my arms.

“No!”

He was.

“Don’t you want something to drink?” He asked.

“No. I don’t drink, remember?” I told him.

“Ah, come on! Just for tonight! Just one!”

“No, Harry.” I leaned against Louis, who was sipping on his drink.

Harry pointed at me and smirked, getting up without a word, he walked off. I was left confused but shrugged it off and forgot about it. That is until Harry came back to the table with a fruity looking drink.

He set it down in front of me. “You’ll like this one. Can’t even taste the alcohol.” He looked at me, waiting.

“I’m not going to drink it, Harry.” I pushed it away.

“Come on! Don’t be a buzzkill!” He pushed it back. “Just one sip!”

I rolled my eyes. “Fine, if it will make you shut the hell up.” I took a small sip and put it down. It was actually pretty good.

“See?” He said. “It’s not terrible.”

“I don’t drink because I don’t want to make a fool of myself, not because it tastes awful.” I informed him.

“You’re not going to make a fool of yourself after one drink.” He told me. “Just be a bit more adventurous, just tonight!” He urged.

I looked at him like he was an idiot. “Don’t you have some bimbo to be dancing with or something?”

“No. I’m not leaving until you drink that.” He smirked.

I rolled my eyes at him. “Well I guess you’re going to be here all night.” I smirked back.

“You’ll drink it. Just wait. I know you will.” He grinned like a smartass.

“Okay, Harry.” I smiled at him sarcastically and turned to Louis.

“Want to dance?” Louis asked.

“Not really.” I laughed.

“Fine. Later.” He said.

“Yeah, much later.” I mumbled, taking a sip of drink. I looked at Harry. He had a giant smirk on his face. “What?” I asked.

“Nothing.” He said, leaning back.

I let it go and Zayn came back. He sat down next to Harry. “What are you all still doing over here? Don’t feel like having fun?” He teased.

“No.” I snapped.

“You don’t want to dance with me?” He smirked, pretending to look surprised.

“Hell no I don’t want to dance with you.” I laughed. He knew I was joking.

“She won’t dance with anyone.” Harry said.

“Damn right.” I giggled, drinking the cold beverage in front of me. I put down the empty glass.

“I can’t believe you drank it all.” Liam commented.

“What?” I looked down to the glass and it finally dawned on me what I had done. I thought I had felt a little different. I glared at Harry. “You mother fucker! You just watched me drink all of that absent mindedly and didn’t say anything! That’s what you were smirking about, wasn’t it!”

He laughed hysterically. “Why would I have said something? I wanted you to drink it. You should be asking Liam that question, not me.” He pointed at Liam.

“Yeah, how come you didn’t say anything?” I asked him.

“Because I thought you knew what you were doing.” He shrugged.

I busted out laughing for some reason.

“You’re a light weight.” Harry said, smiling.

“Pardon?”

“That one glass you had affected you. It doesn’t take much for you.” He explained.

“Oh.” I leaned into Louis again, who was on his fourth drink.

“Come on, let’s dance.” Harry said, getting up and grabbing my hand.

“I don’t want to.” I told him childishly.

“Come on. Just one! Please?”

“Alright, alright.” I let him pull me up.

He led me out to the crowd of people grinding on each other and making out and stopped close to the DJ. He grabbed my hips and pulled me into him, grinding on me already. I giggled and went along with it. He wrapped his arms around me as we swayed back and forth. I put my hands on his and pushed into him. It might just be the alcohol, but I was feeling very sexy right now. That doesn’t happen often. Or at all really.

He turned me around and pulled me back into him, this time putting his hands on my ass. He put his forehead to mine and smiled at me. I giggled at him and put my arms around his neck. He leaned down and kissed me while we were dancing. I kissed him back, playing with the hair at the nape of his neck. I could taste the alcohol on his tongue. I smiled like crazy when we parted. I felt so wild right now. This whole moment was so thrilling and exciting. I don’t even know how long we’ve been out here. I lost count of the songs after that.

I suddenly felt someone push against me from behind, dancing along with us. I looked behind me only to realize that it was Louis. He grabbed me by the hips and ground into me, sandwhich-ing me between him and Harry. Harry just continued on like nothing had happened. I had never danced like this with Louis before. He was always too much of a gentleman. He wouldn’t have done something like this to me. I guess the alcohol was affecting his behavior. I was getting so hot from the body heat and all the friction. I was massively turned on though.

We were out there for what seemed like hours. I was so tired but I couldn’t care less. I was having so much fun, I felt like I could go on forever.

“Thirsty?” Harry asked me.

I nodded my head. And the three of us walked to the bar. Louis ordered me a water and they both got another drink. I took the glass from the bartender and chugged most of it down. The ice cold water felt so good running down my throat. I was exhausted, but I couldn’t stop the smile that still played on my face.

After I was done with the water, I ordered another and headed back to the table where Liam sat, running through something on his phone. “Hey.” I said as I sat down next to him, out of breath still.

He smiled at me and patted my leg. “You okay?” He asked.

“Yeah. Dancing is tiring.”

He laughed lightly. “Yes it is.”

Niall appeared and sat down next to me. He kissed me on the cheek and smiled at me. “What’s up?” He slurred.

I could tell he was long gone. “How many have you had, Ni?”

He chuckled and tried to count on his fingers, failing miserably. “Enough to get me drunk.” He joked.

I shook my head and smirked. “What are we going to do with you?” I giggled.

“You seem a bit tipsy too.” He observed.

“That’s because Harry tricked me into drinking.” I told him.

“He did? That’s class!” He laughed.

“Shut up.” I rolled my eyes.

“Want to dance?” He asked.

“Sure!” I was still on a high from the last one.

We made it to the dance floor and he grabbed me, smirking down at me as our bodies made contact. I smiled back as my body was already heating up again. He leaned down and put his lips on my neck. I quietly moaned at the action and grinned to myself. I was enjoying this more than I should be.

His lips traveled up to my ear. “I’ve really missed this, El.” He slurred. “I still love you, you know.”

I was a bit shocked at this. I really thought he had gotten over me. “Really? With the way you’ve been acting towards me lately, I thought you were over me completely.”

“No. I was just trying to really give you your space. Just to be sure. But I really miss you.” He confessed, kissing my lips shortly. “Missed this, us.” He looked at me with seriousness in his eyes.

I grinned to myself. A part of me had missed it too. I kissed him back as we danced. I really missed his kiss. The boy was skilled, what can I say. “Let’s just take this slow this time. I don’t think I want a relationship right now. I’m not sure what I want still.”

He nodded, letting me know he was alright with that.

After a while, I was thirsty again. Not to mention my limbs were almost aching. I told him and he dragged me to the bar, getting me a water. We walked back to the table to see that Liam was gone this time, but Harry and Louis were there. And they were beyond gone. Zayn was there too, but he stilled seemed pretty sober. I sat down for two minutes before I felt my phone go off in my purse by my foot. I dug it out and saw that it was mom. I didn’t tell her where I was going tonight so she’s probably wondering where I am since I was at the house all day.

I told them I would be right back, holding up my phone for them to see. They nodded and I got up and left the club out one of the back doors. I called mom back and waited as it rang. She picked up after the third ring.

Hey sweetie. Sorry to bother you, just was wondering where you are?

“I’m just out with some friends. I’ll be back tonight.”

Okay. That’s fine. Just wanted to know you were okay.

“I’m fine, mom. I’ll see you tomorrow, okay?”

Alright then. Love you.

“Love you too, mom. Bye.”

I hung up and turned around to go back in when I realized that the door was locked from this side. I sighed in annoyance to myself and started to walk out of the dark, wet alley way. I almost reached the end when two figures stumbled by, stopping when they saw me.

“Hey. What are you doing out here all alone, sweetheart?” One of them slurred heavily.

I got really nervous and wanted to run, but decided that probably wasn’t the best idea since they were blocking my path. They looked like normal young guys, but I could tell they were no goods. “Um, I was just trying to get around. I was locked out, so I was going around to the front.” I tried to sound calm through my stutters.

They neared me slowly. “What do you need to get back in there for? You can just hang out with us. We’re plenty fun, aren’t we?” He looked to the other, laughing.

“No thanks, I really need to get back to my friends.” I said, trying to squeeze past them.

One of them roughly grabbed my arm and yanked me back, causing a sharp pain to run through my arm. I yelped slightly at the feeling.

“If you’re quiet, we won’t hurt you.” The brunette said.

“Please don’t! I just w-“ He slammed me against the brick wall harshly, knocking the breath out of me.

“I said fucking be quiet!” He hissed at me, slapping my cheek.

I felt the water pool in my eyes as my legs shook.

This can’t be happening. Why do I always have the worst luck? Why? What have done to deserve this?

He started to pull my dress up with a wicked smile as he held my hands up over my head.

“Stop! No! Don’t!” I screamed at the top of my lungs, hoping someone would hear me over the loud booming of the music.

The other one slapped me and put his hand over my mouth, giving me a warning look. I started to cry as I realized there was nothing I could do. I didn’t want to fight too much, I didn’t want to get hurt, and I didn’t know what these guys were capable of. So I stood there, crying silently to myself as he groped me.

“Hey!” The sound of another manly voice echoed down the alley. “Get the fuck off of her!” He yelled as he came charging at them.

He tackled them off of me and threw them both to the ground. He climbed on the nearest one and started to pound their face in. I stood there in shock at the scene. I was still shaking and crying.

The other one got up and jumped on his back, trying to choke him. The familiar figure threw him off, stomping on him before picking him up and slamming him against the wall and punching him repeatedly. I could hear the crunch of the strangers nose. I flinched when I saw all the blood. I was too distracted watching them that I didn’t see the other guy walk up behind me. He put his arm around my neck.

“Stop what you’re doing or the girl gets hurt!” He shouted.

The shadowy figure dropped the almost lifeless body he was holding up and looked straight at the man holding me, giving him a completely unfazed look. He walked straight towards us, taking his time.

“Not one more step!” He warned again.

The tall figure still continued towards us.

“I said stop!” He tried again.

Still coming at us, he finally reached us and the guy hadn’t done a thing to me. He was a coward who was trembling at the intimidating figure before us. He let me go quickly and tried to run. He was caught and lifted off the ground.

“You piece of shit! I will end you! Get the fuck out of here before I do!” He yelled angrily at him before letting him go. The man darted out of there faster than you can say sorry.

I dropped to my knees, realizing that it was over and I didn’t have to worry anymore. I started to sob uncontrollably, burying my face in my hands. I heard someone bend down in front of me and felt a gentle hand on my shoulder.

“It’s okay. It’s over now. Are you okay?” He asked.

I wasn’t sure if I was more shocked by what had almost happened, or by who it was that saved me.

I looked up at their concerned face. “Zayn?”

“Yes, it’s me. Are you okay?” He asked again.

I nodded my head and leaned forward into his shoulder. He put his arms around me, rubbing my back.

“Do you want me to take you home?”

“Please.” I got out between my sniffles.

“Come on.” He picked me up and carried me out of the alley way, hailing a taxi.

We got in and he told them where to go. I curled up next to Zayn and held onto his arm. I didn’t care that it was Zayn at the moment. I was terrified and still shaking. I just wanted to be home. Far away from that place.

“What about the guys?” I asked him.

“Don’t worry about it. I’ll tell them where we’re going.” He wiped away a tear and pulled my back into him. “Just relax, okay? Try to sleep. You’ll feel better if you get some sleep.” He told me, cradling me with his arms.

This was not the ending I was expecting out of this night. But it could have been worse I guess. But for once, I was actually really glad that Zayn was there…

Chapter Text

Zayn paid the driver and carried me to the door. I gave him my keys and he unlocked it, carrying me through the house to the couch where he put me down gently.

"Are you hurt anywhere?" He asked, crouching down to examine me anyway.

"Uh, n-no. I think I'm f-fine." I stuttered out as he grabbed my limbs one by one, carefully looking them over.

“You have a scratched up knee, but that’s all I think.” He told me, scratching his head.

I looked down to my left knee to see that it was slightly bloody. “Oh. It’s okay. I’ll be alright.” I told him, trying to smile.

He gave me a blank expression. “Where do you keep your first aid stuff?” He asked me, standing up.

“It’s really no big deal. I’ll be fine.” I tried to tell him again. He just stared at me, still waiting for an answer. “Uh, closet in the hall, top shelf.” I finally told him, feeling awkward.

This was really weird. Now that I’ve come out of the shock, having Zayn here, alone, helping me, it’s really odd. It’s honestly the last thing I would have expected to happen. I really thought that he would have just left me there in the alley way. I guess I was wrong about him after all. He’s not a completely terrible human. Sure he jokes around with us, but that doesn’t mean he isn’t still a horrible person at the end of the day. But now I can say that he’s a lot better than I thought. There’s more good in him than he lets on.

He returned with the box of first aid stuff and got down on his knees in front of me. He took my black pumps off and put them aside. He took a clean cloth and wet it with the rubbing alcohol, gently dabbing at my knee. It stung and I flinched at the pain. He stopped for a second and looked up at me.

“Sorry.” He mumbled.

I guess I scraped it more than I thought. I had felt it when I dropped to my knees earlier, but I didn’t think it was more than a scratch.

He dabbed it a few more times and grabbed a band aid, opening it and carefully placing it on my knee. He gently rubbed the sides to make sure it would stick, then got up and threw away the trash. He came back and sat down next to me.

“Thank you.” I said shyly.

He nodded his head. “Yeah, no problem.” He mumbled, looking away.

“I mean, for everything. Thanks for saving me and all.” I clarified.

He looked up, staring at me for a moment. “Well I couldn’t very well leave you there to get…” He stopped when he saw me flinch. “Well, yeah. Anyway, are you okay?” He asked again.

I nodded at him, curled up into myself on the corner of the couch. “You took care of everything that needed it.” I gave him a very small grin.

“I mean, mentally.”

“Oh. I’m fine, yeah.” I lied.

“Even I can tell you’re lying.” He gave me an unimpressed face.

I sighed lightly. “How do you always know everything all the time?”

“Like I said, I’m very good at reading people. Especially when they’re trying to deceive me.” He smirked.

“Alright, alright. I’m still a little creeped out. I want snuggles.” I pouted and looked at the ground.

“Uh…”

I looked up and saw that Zayn was staring at me with an unsure face. I laughed. “I’m not asking you.” I smiled at him.

He nodded and smiled. “Is there anything else I can do for you?”

I thought for a second. “Actually, yeah.” I looked at him.

He looked back at me with question. “Yes?”

“Why are you being so nice to me?” I asked.

He looked a little shocked and suddenly nervous. “I might not be the nicest guy, but I’m not going to let some dickheads ruin your life.” He answered, shrugging it off.

“No I mean, now. Right now. You could have just saved me and then left me on my own. I would have been perfectly capable of doing all this myself.”

He looked a bit stumped at my words. “Um, I don’t know. I guess it’s because now that I know you better, I feel more inclined to be nice to you?” He didn’t look so sure himself.

“How did you even know I was in danger?”

“Once I realized that you stepped outside, I knew it wouldn’t be safe out there for you alone. I went looking for you, but you weren’t at the front of the club. I started to worry that something had already happened to you, but then I thought you might have taken the back exit, which is even more dangerous. So I circled around looking for you, and sure enough, I found you.” He explained.

“You mean, you cared enough to think about my safety?” I smiled to myself.

“Yeah, I guess I did.” He stared at the floor.

It was quiet after that for a little while.

“So you don’t still hate me?” I asked in a small voice.

He looked at me with a strange face. “Hate you? I never hated you. You were just fun to mess with. I didn’t really know you, so hurting your feelings or anything like that wasn’t a big deal to me. As bad as that is, it’s the truth.”

“Oh. That’s all it was? Entertainment for you?” My voice came out a little more unstable than I had planned.

“At the time, yes. But… I want to… I want to say, sorry for all of that.” He dropped his gaze to his lap.

“It’s okay. You already apologized, remember?”

“I mean really this time. That was insincere. But this time I mean it. I am sorry for all that I did or said to you. I take it all back. You are a very sweet, innocent girl, and I’m sorry. I respect you, and I do feel a very small responsibility to ensure your safety. I understand if you never fully forgive me, but I just wanted you to know that.” He pursed his lips and looked down again.

I sat there staring in complete shock.

Did he just say he respects me? And he’s sorry? Is this the end? Is the world over? What is happening?

“Oh. Wow. I had no idea. That’s… shocking. But, thank you. I respect you a lot more now too. After all of this I can’t exactly say that you’re a bad guy.” I grinned at him.

He gave a smile back. “Anything else I can do for you? Do you need anything? Drink, food, movies, blanket, people?”

“Um, actually, can you call Louis and ask him to come over?”

“Sure thing.” He pulled out his phone.

“What did you tell the guys, anyway?” I asked, curious.

“I told them that you didn’t feel good and wanted to go home. I didn’t mention the uh… incident. I didn’t know if you wanted me to tell them or not.” He said.

“Thanks. How did you know?”

“Just a guess.” He smiled before putting the phone to his ear. He walked out of the room, slowly getting quieter as he walked further away.

I snuggled up on the couch and almost fell asleep before Zayn came back in the room. “Louis is on his way over. You going to be okay? Or do you want me to stay until he gets here?”

“I’d like you to stay. I mean, if you could, please.” I asked shyly from under the hair that was hanging in my face.

He smiled slightly and sat down next to me on the couch again.

“Thanks again, Zayn.” I smiled at him before drifting off.

~

“I’m here, love.” The soft voice of Louis woke me.

I sat up and looked around in the dim room. There was a lamp on in the corner, but all other lights in the house were off. I squinted and struggled to see Louis’ figure as my eyes adjusted. “Hey, Louis.” I smiled as he bent over and hugged me.

“Zayn said you needed me? Are you alright? What happened to your knee, love?” His brows knitted together as his face showed concern. He tucked the hair in my eyes behind my ear, crouching down in front of me to be eye level.

I nodded my head like a sleepy child. “I’m fine, it’s just a little scratch. But… I have something to tell you.” I confessed.

“Okay. Shoot, babe.” He waited patiently but curiously as I hesitated to tell him.

“Well, the reason I left so early is because I kind of got into trouble, but Zayn helped me and I’m okay.” I smiled at the end to soften the news a bit.

He tilted his head. “What kind of trouble?”

“Before you freak out, I’m totally one hundred percent okay.” He nodded before I continued. “Do you remember when I left to take that call?”

He thought for a second before shaking his head. “No, I have no memory of it. I must have been a little too drunk at the time. Sorry.” He said, looking a little ashamed.

“Well, when I left to take the call, I went out the back door of the club but it locked me out, so I had to go around, and I almost got…” I swallowed nervously at the word. I never noticed what a harsh word it was until now.

He looked at me with worry, waiting for me to finish. Although I’m sure he already knew what I was going to say, he was just waiting for me to say it. “You almost got, what?” He gently urged.

“R-Raped by two strangers. Luckily Zayn was there to fight them off and he brought me home.” I finished, tearing up now.

Louis face was one of pure horror. “Eilana, I’m so sorry. I’m so sorry, I should have been there.” He engulfed me in a loving hug. “I’m so sorry. I’m so sorry, love.” He drew back and softly grabbed my face, looking me in the eye. “Are you okay? Did they hurt you? You must have been terrified.” He stroked my cheek with his thumb.

“I’m fine, Louis. It’s okay, it’s not your fault. Don’t be sorry.” I smiled faintly at him.

“But it is my fault! I should have been there for you. I should have paid you more attention.” The guilt could be seen on his face.

“Louis, It’s not your fault. It’s my fault. I should have been more careful.” I told him, putting my hand on his cheek.

He took my hand and kissed it. “I’m still sorry. If I hadn’t been so damn drunk I might have prevented you from going out there alone at all.”

“Don’t worry about it. But, could you not tell the other guys? There’s just no need to.”

“Of course. Anything you want, love.” He smiled at me and kissed my forehead. “Can I do anything for you?”

“Can you make me some tea?”

“Sure, love.” He smiled and walked to the kitchen.

I turned on the television and saw that a Christmas movie was on. I watched that for a few minutes before Louis came back in with my tea.

“Here you go.” He handed it to me carefully, sitting down next to me with his own cup.

“Thank you, Lou-Bear.”

He smiled as he sipped out of his own cup and noticed what movie was on. White Christmas. “I love this movie. I watch it every year.” He commented.

“Really? Me too!” I giggled at our similarity and turned it up a bit. “Hey, weren’t you drunk earlier? How are you feeling?”

“Not the best, but I’m alright.” He smiled at me.

“Your head doesn’t hurt? Shouldn’t you do something about it? Get some rest or something?”

“The only thing I’m worried about right now is you.” He set his tea down and snuggled into the couch, pulling me into him before grabbing the blanket that always sat on the back of the couch and draped it over me.

I snuggled up to him, smiling at the familiarity of it all. “Where’s Zayn?” I asked suddenly.

“He went home, said you only wanted me here.” He rubbed my arm and smiled.

I never told him that. Wow. He really does know everything.

“Lou, what are we doing for your birthday?”

“I don’t know. Whatever I feel like doing that day I guess.” He shrugged.

I nodded and buried my face into his chest and started dozing off. “Louis?”

“Yes, love?” He stroked my hair and smiled down at me sweetly.

“Are you going to go home tonight?”

“Do you want me to?”

“No.”

“Good. Because I would have stayed anyway.” He chuckled.

I smiled and let myself drift off.

~

I woke up in my bed with arms wrapped around me, and the familiar scent of Louis. I smiled and opened my eyes to see a peacefully sleeping boy. I watched as his bare chest rose and fell with every calm breath. I noticed how dark and thick his eyelashes were, and how his tan skin was flawless. I noticed the way his hair fell into his face slightly when he slept, and how his pink lips were almost curved into a small smile as he dreamt. I loved how even though he was fast asleep, he still kept a firm hold on me, as if someone was going to try and take me from him. I was well aware how perfect and special this boy was, and I loved him with all my heart. I’ve never known anyone quite like Louis.

I kissed him on the cheek softly and smiled as his eyelids fluttered open.

He smiled at me and rubbed his eyes. “Good morning, love. Feeling better?”

“Yep. What about you? Is your head okay?”

“Yeah, I feel great.” He smiled and pulled me into a hug. “I miss this. I get the best sleep when I’m with you.” He mumbled.

I giggled and blushed slightly. “Your birthday is tomorrow.” I reminded him, playing with his hair.

He nodded and closed his eyes, a smile still on his lips. “What do you want to do today?”

I put my finger to my lips and thought about it. “I’m feeling kind of, stay-home-and-do-cool-fun-stuff-all-day, day. What do you think?”

“Way ahead of you.” He laughed.

I got up and went to my closet to pick out an outfit. I noticed for the first time this morning that I was wearing the big T shirt of Louis’ he let me have to sleep in. I looked down at it confused, and turned back to Louis, giving him a weird look and pointing to the shirt.

“That dress didn’t look very comfortable to sleep in.” Was all he said before going back to his phone.

I shrugged it off and turned back to my closet, pulling out a pair of black jeans and a dark purple sweater. I went to the bathroom to get a shower and told Louis I would be right back. I got my shower and got dressed, walking back into my room, I found Louis going through my jewelry box.

“What are you doing in there?” I asked him.

He didn’t answer me but instead pulled something out and turned around. “You still have it.” He held it up and smiled at me. It was the necklace he gave me.

I rolled my eyes. “Of course I still have it. Why wouldn’t I? It’s my favorite necklace.” I told him.

“Oh really? And why is it your favorite?” He asked with a giant grin on his face.

“Because it’s pretty.” I said simply. He kept looking at me and raised his eyebrow. “And because you gave it to me. It’s special to me. I would never get rid of it. Not everyone is as dramatic as you Louis.” I laughed and snatched it from him, putting it back in the box.

I put on my black Toms and brushed my hair before applying a little eyeliner and some mascara. I got up and grabbed my phone, putting it in my back pocket. I walked back over to Louis and stood in front of him, smiling.

He kissed me on the cheek. “Beautiful.” He smiled down at me.

I blushed a tiny bit and giggled. “Let’s go do awesome stuff!”

“Okay!” He imitated me.

I hit him on the arm and laughed. “I do not, nor have I ever, sounded that manly.”

He laughed and followed me to the front door.

“Let’s play in the snow!” I said excitedly.

He smiled like a kid and put on his jacket before helping me with mine. “I haven’t played in the snow in years.” He said.

“I’ve never played in the snow.” I confessed.

He turned to look at me with shock. “What?”

“Yeah. Where I’m from, it never snows. So I’ve never really seen snow before coming to England.” I told him.

“You deprived child.” He shook his head in sadness for me.

“I know, pretty sad, right?” I laughed.

He opened the door for me and I went running outside in excitement. It was actually currently snowing. I stopped when I realized and looked straight up to watch all the snowflakes fall. I was mesmerized by the sight.

“Pretty, right?” He said, standing next to me doing the same.

“Yeah. Beautiful.” I could have stood there all day just watching the snow fall elegantly around me. I was snapped from my trance when I felt something soft it me. I turned around to see Louis smiling mischievously at me from the other side of the yard. I smiled and narrowed my eyes at him. “So that’s how you want to play, huh?” I bent over and made a snow ball of my own. I had never done it before, so I just did what I could. I threw it at him and hit him on his side as he was bent over.

“Ow shit!” He started laughing hysterically as he held onto his side.

“Sorry!” I covered my mouth and started giggling. I couldn’t help it, his reaction was too funny.

He looked at me, still laughing. “Wait, wait, wait! Let me teach you how to make a snowball properly before I start bleeding!” He joked and walked over to me. “Now, you don’t want to pack them too tight or else you’re going to kill someone. You might as well be throwing rocks if you do that. Just grab a handful and lightly form it into a ball. Try not to press too hard.” He laughed lightly while showing me how to do it.

I was listening but I was still giggling. “Sorry, Lou-Bear. You okay?” I patted his shoulder.

He smiled at me. “Yeah, I’m fine. Just wasn’t expecting that.” He laughed. “But now that you know what you’re doing, the war is on.” He narrowed his eyes at me and took off across the yard.

He was out of sight within a few seconds. I started making a whole arm full of them and looked around for any sign of him. There was none to be seen. I thought I heard a chuckle and I turned around just in time to see Louis running right past me, throwing a pile of snow balls at me. I unloaded on him as well, pelting him quite a few times before he disappeared again, all the while laughing.

“Oh, so you think you’ve got a strategy?! We’ll see about that!” I yelled after him. My hands were freezing cold. I almost couldn’t feel them, but I couldn’t have cared less at the moment. I was having fun being a kid again, and I wasn’t planning on stopping. It had become eerily quiet, and my suspicion was growing as to where he had gone to.

Suddenly, I was tackled to the ground by a laughing Louis. We hit the snow and I started laughing. “You scared me!”

“Good! That was my intention.” He smiled down at me.

I gave him a playful glare and crossed my arms. “Meany.”

“Aw, come now, love. I was only joking.” He kissed me on the cheek and gave me a puppy pout.

“That’s not fair!” I told him.

He laughed and leaned down. I realized he was trying to kiss me so I grinned and pushed him off me.

He pouted at me. “What was that for?” He asked.

“Snow angels!” I yelled and started to move my arms and legs.

He looked at me like I was crazy, but then he shrugged and started making one of his own.

We finally stood up and looked at them. His was much bigger than mine. I looked at him with a funny smile. “I bet my snow angel could crush your snow angel!” I teased.

“Maybe, but I do know that I could crush you!” He smirked at me and I ran, screaming and giggling as he chased me into the house.

~

“Such a mess.” I said as I looked around the kitchen.

We had spent the whole day making Christmas cookies, trying to make a pie that just ended up in a food fight, dancing around the house to Christmas music, and just laying around and snuggling.

“We’ll clean it up later.” I told him. We were currently making homemade hot chocolate. It was my mom’s recipe, and it was delicious and creamy.

“Almost done.” I told him, stirring it in the pot on the stove.

He got off the counter and stood behind me, wrapping his arms around me. “Today was the best day.” He said, burying his face in my neck.

“It was. It was perfect. I haven’t had a day like this in a while.” I smiled to myself, realizing just how happy I was.

I turned off the stove and pulled the two mugs over, filling them with the hot chocolate. I gave one to Louis and he immediately took a sip.

He pulled it away from his face quickly with a scrunched up face. “Hot!”

“Yes, hot chocolate.” I laughed at him. “You’re still five.” I said, rolling my eyes.

His phone rang and he dug it out. He looked up at me. “It’s Harry.” He said.

“Answer it.” I told him.

“Hey, mate. What’s up? … Yeah… uh huh…. hold on.” He put his phone to his chest and looked at me. “They want to know if they can come over and hang?” He asked me.

“Sure, that’s fine.”

“She said yes. Alright, see you in a bit.” He hung up.

“Are they all coming over?” I asked.

“Yep. The whole crew.” He sipped his drink.

I nodded and leaned against the counter. I was kind of excited to be hanging out with Zayn now that we had gotten everything out and talked about. I think he and I are actually going to be good friends.

~

I answered the door to the whole lot of them. “Did you guys all come in the same car or something?” I laughed, hugging Niall.

“No, we came in two cars.” He smiled.

I hugged Liam and Harry, waiting for Zayn to step in. He was all the way in the back of the group like usual, but his head was down and he wasn’t saying anything to me.

“Hey, Zayn.” I waved at him.

He looked up at me, expressionless, and passed right by me without a word.

Okay. I guess he’s not having a good day…

“I smell chocolate.” Liam said.

I laughed and pointed to the kitchen. “I just made hot chocolate. I think there’s enough left for you to have some.”

He rushed into the kitchen followed by Niall. “How are you doing today?” Harry asked me with a smirk.

“Good. How are you?” I asked him, looking around. It was just me and Harry. Zayn had already skulked away.

“Better now that I get to see you.” He smirked and came closer to me.

I gave him a raised brow. “You’re joking? Stop with the pick-up lines.” I laughed.

He smiled and leaned down, trying to kiss me. I turned my head and he kissed me on the cheek. He looked at me funny.

“What? What do I have to do?” He asked, sighing.

“You can’t just, kiss me whenever. We’re not dating.” I told him.

“But you let me before.” He argued.

“I was feeling a little wild that night. You just have to catch me in the right mood.”

“Or I could just put you in that mood.” He smirked.

I giggled at him. “Good luck.” I told him.

He leaned in again and I turned my cheek again. He grabbed my face and kissed me anyway. I kissed back against my better judgment. It was hard to resist once he had you. I eventually pushed away and looked down. He started to kiss my jaw but I tried to ignore it.

“What’s up with Zayn?” I asked.

He stopped and looked at me with a weird expression. “Why are you suddenly interested in Zayn?”

“I was just wondering. He seems like he’s in a bad mood today or something.”

“Um, no. He’s been fine all day.” He said. “Is there something you want to tell me?” He asked, clearly suspicious.

“No. Why?”

“Just wanted to know why you interrupted our kissing session to ask me about someone I thought you couldn’t give a fuck about.” He said, looking at me intensely.

“He just seemed like he was finally being friendly with me the other night, and now he seems cold and distant again.” I explained.

“You think all that just because he didn’t smile and say hello to you?” He asked me like I was stupid.

“Yes.” I crossed my arms. “I was just curious anyway, I don’t know why you have to get all touchy about it.”

“I care because I like you and I don’t want you being into some other guy.” He furrowed his brow, looking a little mad.

“Hey, whoa. If I happen to like someone else, there’s nothing you can do about it. You can’t control everything, Harry.”

“You want to bet?” He put his arms to the wall, blocking me in.

“That has nothing to do with you. You have no power over it.” I told him, getting a little mad myself.

“You’re so naive. I have more power than you think.” He said. “Do you like Zayn?” He asked me.

I was a little bit intimidated with the way he was towering over me and in my face. “No. I was just curious, like I said.” I told him honestly.

“Good. And you better not be lying. I think it would be best if you just kept your eyes on me for now.” He smirked and kissed me.

I wasn’t having it this time. I was mad. I pushed him away. He gave me a confused look and tried to grab me when I started to walk away. I wiggled in his grip. He eventually let me go and threw his arms up. “What the hell is wrong with you?” He asked as I stormed away.

I made it to the kitchen where Niall and Zayn were. “Where are the others?” I asked, picking up my mug of hot chocolate. Except it wasn’t so hot anymore.

“They’re in the living room, doing god knows what.” Niall answered.

I looked at Zayn through the corner of my eye, only to see that he was also looking at me inconspicuously. We both looked away quickly.

“So what did you do all day?” I asked Niall.

“I lazed around, had dinner with the family, it was a nice day.”

“What did you do, Zayn?” I was testing him to see if it was just me, or if he was actually in a bad mood. Harry said he was fine, but I can’t tell.

He shrugged his shoulders, not even looking at me.

Okay. Failed attempt.

I let it go and went to the living room. I sat down between Louis and Liam.

“Everything alright, love?” Liam asked me, patting my leg.

I smiled and nodded at him. “So what are we doing?” I asked.

“I say we have a Christmas movie marathon.” Louis said.

“Can we please?!” I asked, excited.

“Everyone good with that?” He asked.

Liam and Niall, who was now in the room, nodded. I noticed Harry was sulking by himself on the chair in the corner. I laughed silently to myself at how childish he is. He’ll get over it. He always does.

Zayn came in just as we were putting in the first movie. He sat down on the other chair, ignoring me completely. I noticed that Harry was slightly glaring at him. I rolled my eyes.

Niall turned the lights off and we all snuggled in to watch the movie. As funny and entertaining as it was, I couldn’t pay attention. All I could think about was why Zayn was being just like his old self again. I was so confused.

He wasn’t even this bad in the last week, so what the fuck is going on with him? I thought we had resolved this issue last night. Did I miss something? Is he just trying to hide it from everyone else? I have no clue why he’s being like this. And what did Harry mean when he said that earlier? It was scary. I hope he’s not serious. If I want to like someone else, then that’s my business. He can’t do anything to stop it. Can he? This whole Zayn thing is bugging me though. I was excited to finally put all of this behind us, so why is he making it so difficult? Unless he changed his mind or something.

I hope not. I really wanted to be totally accepted into the group. He’s so confusing. What could I have done in twenty four hours to make him hate me again? Maybe Harry is wrong. Maybe he is just in a bad mood. I guess I’ll find out soon…

Chapter Text

"Happy Birthday Lou-Bear!" I hugged him tightly as I opened the front door to him.

He laughed and picked me up, spinning me around. "Thank you, love." He kissed me on the cheek and put me down.

"Having a good day?" I asked, smiling up at him.

"Yes, I am. What about yourself?"

"Great! It's my best friend’s birthday! Of course I'm happy!" I beamed at him.

"Actually, it's Christmas Eve." He corrected.

"Well, it's more your birthday than Christmas Eve to me." I stuck my tongue out at him.

He rolled his eyes.

"So what are we going to do today?!" I asked, jumping up and down in excitement.

He put his hands on my shoulders. "Calm down there, bouncy." He chuckled. "I don't know yet. I'm just going to go with whatever I feel like doing at the moment. We haven't had a day like that in while, don't you think?"

"Is that really what you want to do? You don't want to have a big party with all your millions of friends?" I asked him, quirking up an eyebrow.

"Nah. You're the only one I need to be happy." He smiled and ruffled my hair.

I blushed slightly and looked down to his red Toms. "So what are we going to do?" I asked him. "It's almost lunch time."

"Why don't we go get lunch?" He asked.

"It's your birthday, what are you asking me for? We always do what I want. Now it's your turn to do what you want. The possibilities are endless. We can do whatever you want, Lou." I smiled at him.

He raised his brow as a smirk grew on his face. "Whatever I want?" He wiggled his eyebrows.

I hit him on the arm and giggled. "We'll have to find you another woman for that. But for anything else, I'm your girl." I pointed to myself.

"I'm just joking, love. Let's get food then. I'm starving." He grabbed my hand and dragged me to his car.

~

After lunch we went to get ice cream and now we’re currently at the skate park. We’ve been here for a while. It was pretty cleared out, seeing as it was winter and all.

“Louis, I don’t think this is such a good idea.” I told him as I contemplated stepping onto the skateboard.

“I’m not going to let you fall, I promise.” He looked into my eyes with his bright blue ones, a playful smile on his face.

“How am I supposed to believe you when you have a peculiar smile on your face?” I smirked and crossed my arms.

“I do not!” He chuckled. “Eilana, do you really think I would let you get hurt?” He tilted his head to the side and looked at me funny.

“…No.” I mumbled.

“Alright then. Come on.” He motioned me over with his fingers.

“I’m still not sure.” I told him, looking at it nervously.

He stuck his hand out and looked down at me. “Do you trust me?” He asked.

“What?” I smirked up at him.

“Do you trust me?” He asked again.

“Louis, you are not Aladdin. And I’m certainly not Jasmine.” I giggled at him.

“Just get on.” He laughed.

I took Louis hands and nervously stepped onto the board. Skateboards and I don’t have a very friendly past, so I wasn’t so sure about being on one again. I had always wanted to skateboard, but I was always too scared. Louis on the other hand, was great at it.

I stepped onto it with both feet and looked up at Louis with a smile. He smiled back. “See? Nothing happened.” He said.

“Not yet.” I said under my breath. I let out a tiny terrified sound when I realized that I was moving. Louis was slowly dragging me along beside him by the hands. I looked at him, clearly a little scared.

“I’m not going to let you go. You’ll be okay.” He smiled at me.

I let him drag me along, and after a while I realized I had a smile on my face. He picked up the speed a little, almost having to jog next to me to keep up. It started to get faster and faster until I realized that I was headed straight for the fence. I shrieked and smiled in the excitement of it all. But before I could reach the fence, Louis grabbed me off of the board by my waist, spinning me around and around and laughing. I giggled along with him and he lifted me up to the sky. He had the biggest smile on his face as he stared up at me. I smiled back and he put me down, pulling me into a cozy hug. He put the tip of his nose to mine and we just stared at each other.

“I love you so much.” He whispered.

“I love you more.” I whispered back, giggling.

It was just one of those moments where we were both absolutely happy for no reason. I love those kind of moments.

His smile seemed to falter a bit after my words, but it picked back up again.

“What’s wrong, Lou-Bear?” I asked him, concerned.

“Nothing.” He smiled brightly and took my hand. “Let’s go shopping. I haven’t been shopping in a while.” He said, dragging me along.

I just silently followed behind him and decided not to question it. If he had something to tell me, he would tell me. He always does.

We went to the mall and we were having a lot of fun just goofing around in the different stores. We went to the costume store and we were trying on different costumes and taking silly pictures of ourselves, then we went to the toy store and picked up some cowboy guns and hats and we were having a cowboy draw on one of the aisles. People were staring at us but we just laughed.

That’s why I liked being with Louis. I could do whatever I wanted around him and never feel stupid for it, because he would always be right next to me, doing the very same thing.

We were walking through the mall when we passed by the jewelry store. I saw something in the window and stopped, getting closer to inspect it. It was a pair of purple diamond stud earrings. I had never seen purple diamonds before. They’re really, really rare. And very expensive, so I can forget ever owning them. I sighed at the sight in front of me.

“What is it?” Louis asked as he came up behind me, having a look into the window himself. “Oh. Wow. Those are beautiful.” He said.

“Yeah, they are.” I said a bit sadly.

He noticed my change in attitude and smiled over at me. “Hey, cheer up. You never know, maybe someone will buy them for you one day.” He put his arm around me.

“Louis, no. Do you have any idea how expensive those are? No way. Absolutely not. I will not accept them.” I gave him a stern look.

He chuckled and rolled his eyes. “Fine.” He gave up. “Let’s go buy some clothes.”

~

“I’m already hungry again.” Louis said as we set down all the bags of clothes and shoes and other stuff in his room.

“What do you want to do for dinner?” I asked him as I laid down next to him on his bed.

Before he could answer, my phone rang. I dug it out and looked at it. Niall. I showed it to Louis and he waved his hand tiredly at the phone, signaling me to answer it.

“What’s up, Ni?”

We were just wondering what you were doing for Louis’ birthday? He hasn’t contacted us all day. Harry mentioned that it was his birthday today, so we thought we might do something special for him.

“Oh. Well I’m actually with him right now. He said he was just kind of winging it.”

Ah. Well do you guys want to get together tonight? I mean, since it is Christmas Eve and all. I thought we could all do gifts tonight.

“That sounds good to me. But let me check with Louis. It is his birthday after all.”

I looked over at Louis and smiled. “Louis, what do you think about getting together tonight and doing Birthday and Christmas gifts with everyone?”

“I think that sounds good.” He smiled.

“He said that’s fine.”

Cool. We’ll see you later then.

I hung up and rolled onto my side, facing Louis. “Are you sure that’s what you want to do?” I asked him.

He looked at me and smiled. “Of course. Why wouldn’t I?”

“It’s just, I feel like by doing Christmas things, that it takes away from your birthday. And I want your birthday to be just as special as everyone else’s.” I told him.

He chuckled and rolled onto his side too. “My birthday is just as special, if not more so to me. I love Christmas, and having it be a part of my birthday is great to me. It’s all I’ve ever known so I’m used to it. And I really do enjoy it. I do, I promise. So stop worrying.” He brushed the hair out of my face.

“I just want you to have the best birthday, Louis. You deserve it. You’re such a good person and-“

“Relax. I’ve had the best birthday today. I got to spend the whole day doing some of my favorite things with my favorite person. I ate delicious food, bought cool stuff, and got to do whatever I wanted. It couldn’t have been any better.” He told me.

I sighed and looked down at the sheets between us. “Are you sure? Because I feel like-“

“Eilana, even if the only thing I did all day was lay here and look at you, it still would have been the best birthday. It’s not so much what I do, so much as it’s who I do it with. And I want to do everything with you. And I got to. So I couldn’t be any happier. Understand?” He chuckled.

I smiled kissed him on the cheek. “How did you get so sweet, Louis?”

He smiled and pulled me into a hug and we snuggled and talked about anything and everything, sharing a good amount of laughs at our memories and our future.

~

Louis’ mom and his sisters wound up cooking a big Christmas Eve feast, and invited everyone over. Louis was more than happy to have everyone over on his birthday.

Harry, Liam, Zayn, Niall, Niall’s parents, Zayn’s parents, and my mom showed up for dinner. It was interesting that’s for sure. I couldn’t keep from looking at Zayn’s parents though. His dad was a big man, who looked to be dressed very extravagantly, while his mother was also dressed to the nines. Sure, everyone was a little dressed up, but they were just… different. And they gave off a weird vibe, but they appeared to be very nice anyway. Harry’s parents didn’t show up for obvious reasons, as well as Liam’s parents. But it was a very nice, pleasant dinner with lots of smiles and laughs. It was nice. I haven’t had a dinner like that since I was young.

“We’re going to go hang out upstairs.” Louis’ announced after all the cake and presents.

“Alright sweetie.” His mom said, giving him a hug and a kiss on the cheek.

We all ventured upstairs, leaving the adults to talk amongst themselves, and settled into the media room.

“How about a game of pool, boys?” Louis asked with a smirk.

“I’ll win this one. No doubt about it.” Harry smirked back.

“I’m going to sit this one out.” Zayn said, sitting down next to me.

“Alright then. Suit yourself.” Liam said.

I looked at Zayn with confusion. “Don’t feel like playing?” I asked him carefully.

“Nah.” He smiled slightly. “So how are you?” He asked.

I cocked an eyebrow at him. “…I’m good. How about you?” I asked back slowly.

“I’m doing good. Did you spend all day with Louis?” He asked, being totally nonchalant.

“Uh… yeah.” I was so weirded out by his suddenly nice demeanor. “What was up with you yesterday?” I was shocked by my own bravery.

He looked at me blankly. “What do you mean?”

“I mean, you were being kind of stand-offish to me yesterday.” I stated bluntly.

“Sorry. I just… I was having a weird day I guess.” He rubbed the back of his neck and looked down awkwardly.

“Oh. I thought maybe you changed your mind about me again or something.”

“No. I still mean what I said.” He smiled at me faintly and looked away.

I smiled to myself and relaxed, finally knowing that I was wrong.

“Whoo!” I heard loudly from behind us. I turned around to see Harry with his arms in the air as he circled Louis. “Beat that!” He pointed to the table.

Louis only smirked and stepped up to the table, making a successful trick shot and ending the game. “Maybe someday you’ll beat me.” He sighed happily and put his pool cue up.

Harry stood there sulking quietly. “But…but I made such a good shot! How could you possibly make that shot around the ball! I call bullshit! There’s no way!”

I walked to him and put my hand on his shoulder. “Harry, you’ve been beaten. Just accept defeat.” I smiled at him and patted his shoulder.

“Did you see that?!” He asked me in disbelief.

“Yep. But it’s okay. Like Louis said, maybe someday.” I pretended to have sympathy for him.

“Movie?” Niall asked.

“That sounds good.” Louis said, sitting down. He looked at me and patted the spot next to him. I smiled and sat down by him.

“Having a good birthday?” I asked.

He smiled and nodded. “Yes, it’s wonderful.”

I snuggled into him and watched the opening credits.

~

Half way through the movie, Niall was asleep, Liam was on his way there, and I was thirsty. I went downstairs to the kitchen to grab something to drink.

While I was rustling through all the drinks in the refrigerator, I heard someone come in. I turned around to see Harry. “Hey, Harry.” I greeted him lazily and went back to the search for my drink.

I felt him grab my hips from behind. “Harry, what are you doing?” I sighed.

“What I’ve been waiting to do all day. Why don’t you give me my Christmas present early?” He mumbled into my neck.

I laughed lightly. “You are so horny all the time, just go get fucked, for everyone’s sake. Because you’re not getting any from me.”

“I do not need to get to get fucked. I need your attention.” He corrected.

“And how is my attention any different than some other girl?” I questioned.

“I don’t just want your physical attention, I want your full attention. That’s very rare for me.”

I turned my head towards him. “I do give you attention though. Just as much as everyone else.” I told him.

“That’s the problem. I want more. Give me more.” He begged against my skin.

“Goodness. So needy.” I teased.

He spun me around and kissed me. “Only for you, El.” He smiled at me, eyes glittering. “If you don’t give me more attention, then I’m just going to have to take it from you.” He said cheekily.

“Oh?” I smiled.

He nodded and kissed me again, arms wrapped around my waist tightly. “I really, really like you, El.” He nuzzled his nose into the crook of my neck.

I couldn’t stop the smile on my lips. “And I like you, Harry. I’m just not ready for another relationship right now.”

“That’s fine. Until then, what’s wrong with getting a little affection?” He smirked, kissing my neck lightly.

I let my eyelids flutter closed. “Mmm but I don’t want anyone to know.” I mumbled out.

“Then no one has to know. It can be our little secret.” He whispered in my ear.

My eyes shot open at the word secret. “No. No, no, no. I don’t want to keep anymore secrets.” I pulled away and shook my head.

“It’s not hurting anyone.” He stated.

“Yes, but-“

“But what? You’re not tied to anyone. No one can stop you. You’re free to do what you want.” He said, pulling me back.

“I know, I just feel like it’s wrong though.” I sighed.

“It’s not. There’s nothing wrong with liking someone.” He said. He kissed me sweetly. “Why not have someone to give you attention when you need it without having to worry about a relationship?”

“But what about our friendship? You don’t think it will affect that?”

“No. We’re still just friends, right? Come on, Eilana. Do something for yourself for once.” He caressed my face, smiling lightly.

I didn’t say anything, only stared in thought. He took the opportunity to kiss me again. I kissed back and let myself enjoy it for once. He was right, I wasn’t doing anything wrong. I was just enjoying myself.

We heard someone coming so we parted quickly, stepping away from each other. We looked only to see that it was Zayn again.

“What are you guys doing down here? You’ve been down here for ages. You’re lucky I’m the only one that noticed you two were both missing.” He leaned against the doorframe.

“Um, we were just-“

“Snogging face?” He cut me off.

Harry looked to me and gave me a small smile. “We’ll continue this later.” He winked at me and went back upstairs.

I looked at Zayn standing there with the raised brow. “What?” I asked.

“You really like him?” He asked me with a smirk.

“That’s none of your business, Zayn.”

“You do like him.” He shook his head in disbelief. “He’s finally sucked you in.”

“What are you talking about?”

He laughed to himself. “I have to say, I didn’t think his charms would be strong enough to pull you in after all that he did to you, but I was wrong.” He crossed his arms.

“It’s not his charms, it’s because he’s changed.” I told him.

“I know he’s changed, but admit it, you think he has a strange charm about him.” He smiled.

I rolled my eyes. “Yes, he does. But you all seem to.”

He looked at me for a minute, looking thoughtful of something. “You think I’m charming?” He asked me with an amused smirk.

“Well honestly, no. But there is something about you that draws people to you. You’re interesting. Because you keep every detail to yourself. It leaves people wondering about you. In a way, it is kind of like strange charm.” I shrugged.

He smiled at me. “You look at things so differently from other people.”

“I guess so.” I grabbed a soda and walked to the door, stopping in front of Zayn as he was blocking me in. “I would like to go back upstairs now.”

He smiled down at me and quirked an eyebrow. “So go.” He teased.

“You’re kind of in the way.” I said simply.

“You can go around me.” He said.

I gave him a playful glare and tried to squeeze between him and the doorframe. The closer I got to getting past him, the more he pushed into me, until I was eventually stuck between the two.

“Zayn.” I choked out. “I’m stuck and I can’t breathe.” I tried to say with my face smashed against the wood.

He chuckled at me and backed out of the doorway, letting me free. “I’m just messing with you.” He smiled.

“I know.” I smiled and headed back to the room.

Niall was still sacked out, joined by Liam finally, and Louis was sucked into the movie as Harry was only half paying attention to it as he laid across the couch on his phone. I sat back down next to Louis and smiled at him.

“Where did you go?” He asked.

I held up my drink and he nodded his head. The movie was pretty much over by the time I made it back and there was about five minutes left. After that, everyone woke up and decided to go home as it was Christmas tomorrow and it was getting late.

We said our goodbyes, and everyone left. Louis said he would take me home.

“Will you stay for a little while longer?” Louis asked me with hopeful eyes.

I smiled and took my jacket back off. “Of course, Lou.”

“Yay! More time with you is always a good thing.” He smiled and picked me up, carrying me to his room. He set me down on the bed and laid next to me, lacing his fingers with mine as we laid on our backs.

“Was your birthday everything you wanted?” I looked at him.

“Everything and more.” He smiled over at me.

“Good.” I rolled over and kissed his cheek.

He returned the favor and I giggled. “I love you, Louis.”

“I love you too.” He said quietly, bringing my hand to his lips.

We stared at each other for a while, just enjoying the other’s presence.

“Can I ask you a favor?” He scrunched up his face cutely.

“Anything for you, Lou-Bear.”

“Can I have like, a birthday kiss or something?” He asked cutely.

I giggled and blushed. I snuggled closer to him and he wrapped his warm arms around me. He took the initiative and kissed me first. It was just a light, chaste kiss. Totally innocent. I looked at him after and grinned in happiness. He smiled back and brushed the hair from my face.

“Is that all?” I asked him in a joking tone. “Is your birthday complete?”

“Yes.” He said, staring at me sweetly.

I stared back at his ocean blue eyes and remembered those months ago when I was always getting lost in them. And here I am again, doing the same thing. I didn’t pull away when he leaned in again, stopping only for a second to gauge my reaction.

This kiss was sweet. It was longer and full of emotion. It was gentle and made me crave more. I had forgotten how perfectly our lips moved in sync, and how his kisses were always so loving. But he pulled away too soon for my liking. I let out a small whimper of disappointment when he pulled away. He smiled at me and kissed the tip of my nose.

“You are so precious to me.” He whispered.

I didn’t say a thing. Just stared at him, dazed.

He wrapped his arms around me and pulled me into his chest, resting his head at the top of mine. “Just let me hold you for a while.” He mumbled.

I breathed in his comforting scent and almost drifted off to the sound of his heartbeat and the silence that filled the room comfortably. I could spend a day like this. There was always just something about the way that Louis held me that makes me feel so loved. I couldn’t get enough of the feeling.

~

I awoke that morning in my own bed, confused and well rested. And that night, after all of the Christmas festivities were over, there was a knock on my front door at the dark hour of midnight.

I went to answer it, but no one was there. I looked around for any sign of someone, but there was none. I was going to shut the door when a sparkle caught my eye.

I looked down to see a small box, wrapped in red paper with a golden string of ribbon tied neatly into a bow around it. I picked it up and looked around once more. After shrugging, I closed the door and went into the kitchen to unwrap it.

I untied the ribbon and ripped off the paper carefully to reveal a small black velvet box. I opened it up to see the very same pair of purple diamond earrings I had seen yesterday. I gasped at the sight, a big smile spreading across my face.

I am going to kill Louis for spending this kind of money on me.

Chapter Text

"Louis William Tomlinson!" I tapped my foot as I stared at the back of his head.

He turned around with an alarmed and confused look upon his face. "What? What are you doing here?"

I had gone straight to his house the next day, expecting an answer about his little gift I received. I held up the open velvet box containing the two very expensive sparkling studs. "What is this?" I asked him with a sarcastic smile.

He looked down at it and looked back up at me with his mouth in the shape of an O. "I believe those to be the earrings that you wanted so much." He answered simply.

"Yes, they are." I stated, hand on hip.

"So what's the problem? Why am I in trouble?" He asked, confused.

"As much as I did want these, and as beautiful as they are, I absolutely can't keep them. Let alone actually wear them somewhere! Imagine if I lost one or something! I would die! One of these probably cost more than my whole house! I cannot believe that you would spend your money so easily. I don't care how much of it you have, you need to be more responsible with it. And I will not accept these. I'm sorry. It's very nice of you, but I simply cannot take them." I told him, holding them out for him to take.

He looked at me confused still, shifting his eyes side to side. "Uhhh... As much as I would love to say that I bought those for you, I didn't. Sorry. I wanted to, but I knew this was exactly how you would react." He said, giving me a humorous smile.

I stared at him blankly in shock for a few seconds. “Well if you didn’t buy them, then who did?” I asked curiously.

He grinned mischievously and shrugged, slipping his hands into his black jeans pockets.

I gave him a questioning eye. “Louis. Tell me. I know you know who bought them. Now who was it?” I sighed.

He only responded the same way as before. “I can’t tell you. That would kind of render the whole point of anonymously giving you the gift useless, now wouldn’t it?”

I rolled my eyes. “I’m going to have to figure this out on my own, aren’t I?” I asked knowingly.

“Yep.” He smiled happily. “I can’t believe you haven’t already figured it out.” He said.

I cocked an eyebrow at him and a smile crept onto my face as realization sunk in. “It was Niall wasn’t it?”

He only shrugged and smiled again. “Maybe.” He grinned.

“Great. I’ll see you later then. I’ve got to go give these back to him.” I said, turning around to leave.

“Now wait a second love, you’re going to barge into my room and then leave without even giving me so much as a hug?” He asked me.

I turned around with a smile and wide open arms. “Sorry, Lou. I’ll see you later. Love you.” I told him as I gave him a hug and a kiss on the cheek.

He smiled as he returned the gesture and waved me off.

I headed straight to Niall’s house and rang the doorbell. A few seconds later the door opened to a smiling woman who I recognized to be his mother.

“Eilana! So good to see you again! What brings you here?” She greeted me sweetly with a hug.

“I need to speak to Niall is all.” I smiled back at her.

“Oh, of course. He’s up in his room like always.” She smiled and gestured me in.

I stepped in and thanked her as I made my way down the familiar path to Niall’s room. I knocked on his closed door and waited for a response. After not getting one for a few seconds, I knocked again, harder this time. I heard some shuffling around and finally the door opened to reveal a very sleepy looking Niall with bed hair and slightly squinted eyes, wearing nothing but a pair of sweatpants sitting low on his hips. I took in the sight for a second before looking him in the eyes and giving him a disapproving look.

“Eilana? What are you doing here so early?” He asked, running his hand through his hair.

“It’s not that early. It’s almost noon. Were you sleeping?” I asked him, already knowing the answer. That boy would sleep through the end of the world if he could.

He looked around and opened the door wider for me, ushering me in. “What can I do for you, El?” He yawned and sat back down on his bed.

I held out the velvet box once more. “What is this?” I asked him.

He looked at it and furrowed his brows at the sight. “I don’t know. What is it?” He asked me right back.

“You mean you really don’t know?” I asked him, skeptical.

He shook his head and looked up at me. “Who gave it to you?”

I sighed when I realized that he really wasn’t the one responsible. “I don’t know. I thought it was you. Any ideas as to who it might be?” I asked him in hope.

He puckered his lips and looked around. “My guess would be Harry. Seems like something he would do.”

“Thanks, Ni. I’ll see you later then.”

“Wait.” His voice halted me. “About the other night…”

“What other night?” I asked.

“At the club.” He answered.

“…Oh. What about it?” I asked, trying to sound nonchalant.

“What I said, you know, about still loving you, I meant it. It wasn’t just some drunken banter. I still really love you, El. I’m not sure how you feel about me after all this time, but I just wanted you to know that I do still feel for you in that way.” He looked at me with a slightly nervous face and pink cheeks.

I stared at him, not knowing how to answer that. “Um, well I can’t honestly give you an answer about my feelings toward you. I’m still not sure. I’m only more confused.”

Honestly, I thought that I was over Niall, but after that night, my feelings for him were sparked again. Hearing that he still loved me was shocking, but it gave me feelings for him again. The problem is, I’m just not sure how deep these feelings are exactly.

He nodded his head and looked down, rubbing his hands together slowly. “I understand. I don’t expect you to give me an answer right now. I just thought you should know.” He smiled faintly.

“Thanks. I’ll uh…I’ll see you later, Ni, alright?” I gave him a hug and placed a long, soft kiss on his cheek and ruffled his hair, smiling at him before leaving.

I headed to Harry’s, feeling rather ridiculous ringing the bell at his gate. Why does he even need this thing anyway? It opened and I walked down the never ending driveway. Once I made it to the door, feeling exhausted from all the walking I had done in a short period of time today, I gave a few knocks with the giant golden door knocker and waited patiently for a response. William answered the door like usual, greeting me politely and inviting me in.

“How can I help you today, Ms. Stockridge?”

“I need to talk to Harry.” I told him with a polite smile.

“Master Harry will be upstairs, most likely in his bedroom.” He informed me.

I thanked the man and made my way towards Harry’s door. Upon reaching the destination, I knocked loudly, knowing he wouldn’t be able to hear me over the loud music that was coming from the other side. I jiggled the handle, realizing that it was unlocked. I opened the door without hesitation and walked right in. I found Harry sitting on his bed totally sunk into something on his phone. He looked at me immediately upon realizing that the door was open. His face was one of confusion and amusement. I walked right up to the side of his bed and dug the box out of my back pocket.

“Eilana?” He smirked at the sight of me. “What are you doing here?”

I held up the box. “Any clue as to what this might be?” I asked him.

He examined it quickly and looked back at me. “It appears to be a jewelry box.”

“Have any clue as to what’s in it?” I tried again.

He poked his bottom lip out in thought. “Nope.” He smiled up at me.

“So you didn’t purchase any jewelry for anyone in the last few days then?”

“Nope.” He answered plainly. “Why? Do you want jewelry? Because I can buy you whatever you want.” He smiled cheekily at me.

“No, Harry. Nevermind. It’s not you after all.” I said in a huff.

He grabbed the box and opened it up. He took one look inside and raised his eyebrows, whistling. “That’s some expensive stuff right there. Did Liam give you these? He loves purple.”

“You’re right. Maybe it was him. It is like him to do something so nice without taking credit for it. It has to be him. I don’t know how I didn’t think of that first.” I rolled my eyes at my own failure.

“Where are you going?” He asked me as I made my way out.

“I’m going to Liam’s to give these back.” I explained simply.

He motioned me over with his fingers, trying to signal to me that he wants a kiss. I rolled my eyes once more and stepped closer to him. He pulled me down onto the bed with him. “Can’t you just stay for a few minutes? I mean, you came all the way here, and now you’re going to leave so soon?” He smiled, wrapping his arms around me.

“Yes. I have to give these back to whoever bou-Liam so he can return them.” I told him with a sigh.

“But you can stay just for a minute.” He tried again, nuzzling his nose into my neck.

I closed my eyes and yawned. “Only for a minute.” I agreed.

He smiled into my skin and placed butterfly kisses on my neck, running his hand through my hair. I put my arms around him as he turned my head and kissed my lips. I kissed back and he slipped his tongue in my mouth, pushing me over on the bed in the process. His hands ran down my arms, over my waist, and back up, going up my shirt on the way. I felt his hands grope my breasts and I moaned into the kiss.

“Harry.” I pushed against his arms slightly.

He backed off a bit, understanding what I meant. He eventually broke the kiss, trying to catch his breath as he played with the necklace around my neck, tracing the chain with his fingers. “You should come over more often. We really don’t see each other enough.” He panted with a smile.

“What are you talking about? We see each other almost every day.” I reminded him.

“I mean alone.” He kissed me softly, holding himself over me closely.

Unexpectedly, I smiled at his words, blushing. “Oh. Well we’re not dating so it would look kind of suspicious if I just hung around you all the time.”

“So? They can’t prove anything.”

“But Zayn knows.” I told him.

“It’s just Zayn. He keeps to himself. He’s not going to tell anyone.” He said.

“I just feel weird about this.” I told him honestly.

“Why? What about it makes you feel weird?” He sighed, playing with a piece of my hair.

“All of it. I’ve barely ever even had a boyfriend, but to have someone who I’m not dating, but I’m still together with in a way is weird to me. I’m not used to the idea. Like, are we friends with benefits type of thing? I’m just not sure it’s what I want to do.”

He thought for a moment. “I guess that’s what you could call it. We’re not sleeping together or anything like that though. I mean, not until you’re ready for it. We’re just having fun. I enjoy having you to play with, and you obviously enjoy my playing with you, so that’s all we’re doing for now. Because you said you didn’t want a relationship, remember?” He raised his brow at me.

“Yeah, I remember. But when I said that, I meant not having the drama along with it. I’m not sure if I want a relationship because I don’t know if I really want everything that comes with it. Including all of the kisses and touches.” I explained.

He chuckled lightly. “But you clearly do. Otherwise you wouldn’t be letting me kiss and touch on you. Can you honestly tell me that you don’t like what we’re doing?” He looked at me with a doubtful expression.

“Well, no. I just-I don’t know. Whatever. I need to get going.” I told him, standing up.

“Come on, El.” He stood up with me. “Just think about it, okay? If you do decide that you don’t want this, then I’ll stop. But I won’t give up on you. Know that. I’m not going to give up so easily. I’ve never liked another girl like I like you, and I will fight for you.”

I sighed and looked at the ground. “Fine. It’s fine. Just, please promise me that you’ll do your best to keep it a secret? I don’t want everyone making a big deal about it.”

“Of course, love.” He smirked at me triumphantly and hugged me.

“I can’t believe I’m agreeing to this. I swore I was done with secrets.” I mumbled into his chest.

“Don’t think of it as a secret, think of it as a part of your life that doesn’t concern other people. It’s none of their business.”

“Harry, that’s what a secret is.” I looked at him like he was stupid.

“Well, you know what I mean.” He said.

“No, I don’t.” I laughed.

He rolled his eyes and kissed me on the lips sweetly. “I’ll miss you when you’re gone.”

I smiled and hugged him quickly before getting my stuff and leaving. “Later, Harry.” I waved back.

I headed straight to Liam’s house. I looked at my phone, seeing it was already 2:34pm. I made it to Liam’s eventually and knocked on the door, being greeted by Liam himself. He looked tired and a bit sad, but his face lit up when he saw me.

“Eilana. What brings you here, love?” He hugged me, pulling me into the house and out of the cold.

“Did you maybe, buy me something other than my Christmas present?” I asked him sweetly.

He looked at me funny and cocked an eyebrow. “What are you talking about?”

“I’m talking about this.” I opened the box and held it out in plain sight.

His eyes widened at the two sparkling studs. “Those are beautiful. Are those real diamonds? They must have cost a fortune.”

“So you didn’t buy them either? Then who the hell did?” I huffed in aggravation.

“What do you mean? You don’t know who gave them to you?” He tilted his head.

“Nope. I’ve been trying to track down the person who did all day, but I’ve had no such luck.” I told him.

He nodded his head slowly. “And you thought it was me?” He smiled.

“Yeah. First I thought it was Louis, and then Niall, but then I thought it was Harry, and I thought for sure that it was you finally, but it doesn’t seem to be that way. So now I have no idea who it could be.” I sighed.

“You don’t think… Zayn?” He proposed.

I looked at him like he was crazy. “Are you serious? Why would Zayn spend this much money on me? Sure he’s been nicer to me lately, but there’s no reason for him to splash out that much cash for me. He barely even knows me.” I laughed.

“Yeah, honestly I doubt it’s Zayn too. Doesn’t sound like him at all.” He agreed. “It was just a thought.”

“So then who the hell is it? I don’t know anyone else that likes me even a little bit as a human.”

“Maybe you have a secret admirer?” He thought aloud.

“I doubt that. Although it does seem to be the only reasonable explanation.” I chewed my lip.

“Believe me, it’s completely possible.” He smiled. “Just accept them. Clearly whoever gave them to you has the money to do so, so just keep them. Enjoy them.” He shrugged.

“Yeah, I guess you’re right.” I shoved them back in my pocket. “Well, thanks anyway.” I gave him a smile and a hug.

“I wish I could say that I got you those for you.” He chuckled. “But unfortunately, I cannot claim it.”

I thanked him again before kissing him on the cheek and leaving back to my house, feeling defeated that I had accomplished nothing.

~

In the days past since then, things had been pretty normal, except that Zayn was being crazy bipolar towards me. One day he would be really sweet and friendly to me, and the very next day he would act like he hated me and he would snub me and pick on me, if he even bothered to acknowledge my existence at all. It was confusing the hell out of me. Did he want to be friends or not? When he was nice to me, it seemed like he was really trying to get closer to me, only to ruin it the next day. We were going in circles and my thoughts were swimming in confusion.

It was the second to last day before New Years, and he was currently on one of his mean days. We were all hanging out at Niall’s house. I had left the room a few minutes ago to take a call from my mother. As I turned around to go back, I bumped into someone pretty hard, almost knocking me over. They caught me and I realized then that it was Zayn I bumped into. He stood me up straight and looked at me harshly.

“Sorry.” I apologized immediately, knowing he would blow up on me today.

“You wouldn’t have to say sorry if you fucking looked where you were going.” He spat, looking me over.

“I’m sorry, I don’t know what else to say. I’ll be more careful next time.” I defended with my hands up.

“I don’t want your apologies, I want you to look where you’re going.” He scowled.

I gave a harsh look back. “Okay, what is your problem? You have been off and on with me for the past couple of weeks. Is there something you have against me?” I had been nothing but nice to him this whole time, but now I was getting frustrated since it didn’t seem to be going away and it was getting old.

“What’s my problem? Excuse me? It’s not my problem, it’s your problem. I’m getting sick of your shit, that’s what it is.”

I scoffed at him and crossed my arms. “What am I doing that’s apparently pissing you off so much? Please, enlighten me.” I waited for an answer.

He stared blankly at me, almost like he didn’t have an answer. “You know what you’re doing, don’t play dumb with me.”

I scrunched my face in confusion. “What? No I don’t. I would like to know so I can fix it.” I told him.

“You can’t fix it. It’s not something you can fix. Forget it.” He mumbled, looking away.

“No, please, tell me. I’m sure I can fix it. At least let me try.”

“No! I said forget it! You can’t fix it! I’m the only one who can fix it and it doesn’t appear that I’m capable!” He raised his voice, making me flinch.

“What are you talking about?” I asked.

He sighed and ran his hands through his hair. “Nevermind.” He grumbled.

“Zayn, let me help y-“

“I don’t want your help! I said forget it!” And with that he stormed out of the front door, slamming it behind him.

I looked at the door in shock and confusion. “What?” I whispered to myself.

I made my way back to the room of only four guys now and sat down in my spot between Harry and Louis.

“What was that? It sounded like a door.” Niall asked.

“Yeah, um, Zayn kind of just stormed out.” I told them, looking at my hands.

“What? Why?” Liam asked.

“I don’t really know… We were just talking and then it turned sour and he got really worked up about something and he left.” I shrugged.

They all glanced at each other. “Weird. Did he say what he was upset about?” Harry questioned.

“Not really. He said that he was sick of my shit, and then he said only he could fix it, and left. Any idea as to what that means?” I asked.

“No clue.” Liam said, the others nodding in agreement.

~

The next day, I was getting ready for the New Years gathering we were having at Harry’s, when there was a knock on the front door. I opened it to be greeted by Zayn.

“Oh, um, hi Zayn. What can I do for you?” I asked him awkwardly.

“I, uh, need to speak to you.” He cleared his throat uncomfortably.

I raised my brow and stepped aside. “Please, come in.” I invited politely.

He stepped into the house, clearly feeling awkward. “I just-I need to…” He tripped over his own words.

I waited patiently for him to get it out, but he just stopped. “What is it?” I urged calmly. I stood there, waiting on him still.

He only stared at me, not saying a word. Eventually, in one swift movement, he stepped up to me and cupped my face in his hands, gently kissing me. I was shocked at the action and remained still for a moment. He kissed me with so much passion, it was so different from before. Nothing like the other times he had kissed me. It was… sweet.

He pulled away before I even gathered my thoughts, and looked at me in bewilderment.

“Wha-“ I touched my lips in shock. “What was that for?” I asked.

He only looked at me, speechless.

“Zayn? What’s goi-“ He cut me off with another kiss. I kissed back slightly, unsure of what was going on and how I should respond. He pulled away suddenly and started pacing back a forth while cursing and running his hand through his hair.

“Zayn? What is this all about? What’s wrong?” I asked, observing his strange behavior.

He stopped with his back to me, breathing heavily. He turned around and stared at me for a moment before answering. “Sorry. Look, just forget that happened.” He sighed and looked at the ground.

“Why?” I was confused. Why did he even do that?

“Eilana, I like you. I mean, I think I do. I know I do. I-I’ve been denying it. I’ve been trying to deny it. Point is, it’s not working very well. That’s why I’ve been so hateful towards you these past couple of weeks. I’m sorry. I was just trying to get these feelings to go away.” He explained quickly. Almost too quickly for me to keep up.

“…What? This is weird. I mean, shocking. That’s a better word. Yeah. Wait, so, why have you been trying to deny it?”

“Because Eilana, I don’t want to like you. I don’t want you to get involved in my life.” He said bluntly.

“Oh. Ouch.” I tried to laugh at myself.

“No, what I mean is, I don’t want you to be involved in the kind of life I’m involved in. I do care for you, and so because of that, I don’t want to care for you. Make sense?” He tried to explain.

I knitted my brows together. “…No. It makes no sense to me. What are you even talking about? What kind of life do you lead that you don’t want me to be involved in? Drinking? Drugs? Don’t go assuming that I’ll start it too. I’m not that easily influenced.” I told him, shifting my weight to the other foot.

He rubbed his face. “No, no. It’s not that. It’s much worse. Look, if I like you that way, it could be dangerous for you. I don’t want to put you in danger, okay? That’s why I’m trying so hard not to fall for you, but it doesn’t seem to be working in my favor. You have to understand. I’m sorry about the kiss and all, just… forget about it. I don’t know what I was thinking. It can’t happen.” He sighed.

I looked at him in shock once again. “Dangerous? How so? What could be so dangerous?” I asked in curiosity.

“I can’t tell you, Eilana. That would kind of ruin the whole point. Even if you just knew, it could be dangerous for you. I’m telling you I don’t want you involved with any part of my life at all besides what I share with you. Do you understand?”

I narrowed my eyes in concentration. “I just don’t get it. All of this. It’s so confusing. So, you really like me?”

“Yes, I do. But I’m not going to act on it anymore so don’t worry, I won’t bother you.” He told me.

“But, why can’t I know? I want to know, Zayn. I’ll be fine, I promise.” I begged.

“No! Absolutely not! I told you, no. It’s dangerous! What part of that do you not understand? I’m not going to tell you, and you need to butt out of my business. I’m serious, Eilana. This is not a joke.” He warned.

“But w-“

No. Just stay away from me, Eilana. Stay far away. Please.” He pleaded with sad eyes before turning and disappearing, leaving me to wonder about all of this madness myself.

How strange. I wonder what in the world he could be talking about that’s just so dangerous that he can’t even tell me. The fact alone that he actually likes me that way is weird enough…

~

Later that night at Harry’s, I didn’t mention the weird encounter with Zayn that morning. I thought it best to keep my mouth shut since it was supposedly so dangerous. Although I was unsure about whether or not they knew about it. They were his best friends after all.

 

“I don’t think I want any.” I put my hand up as Harry offered me a glass of the peach champagne they were all drinking.

“You sure?” He smirked and waved the bottle around, as if it was going to entice me somehow.

“I’m sure.” I answered with a blank face.

Harry, Liam, and Niall all walked to the living room, sitting in a semi-circle. Zayn didn’t even show up tonight. I stayed behind in the kitchen with Louis.

“Still not drinking?” He smiled down at me.

“Nope. I like to be sober for events.” I smiled back.

“I’m not going to get drunk, I promise. Never again around you.” He tapped my nose. “You want to try it?” He asked me, holding up his glass.

“I’m not even of age, Louis.” I reminded him.

“I know. But you had that drink at the club. And Harry’s parents don’t care. That’s why we’re here. I’m the only one here that’s legally drinking.” He wiggled his eyebrows.

I sighed. “Okay, I’ll try it. But just because I’m curious of the taste.” I told him.

 

He held the glass to my lips and I took a sip. I puckered my lips and squeezed my eyes shut. It wasn’t exactly pleasant. “Ugh. Why do you drink that stuff?”

He laughed cutely and took a sip himself. “Because I’ve acquired a taste for it. And it’s a good thing you haven’t because I don’t want you drinking.” He told me sternly.

“If I wanted to drink, you wouldn’t stop me.” I teased.

“Maybe not, but I would damn well try.”

I laughed and shook my head. “Come on.” I dragged him along by the hand into the living room with the others.

“There you are. I was about to go looking for you.” Harry winked at me.

I blushed and tried to act like I didn’t even hear him. I took a seat next to him, Louis grabbing the spot next to me.

“Where’s Zayn? I told that wanker that we’d be here. He hasn’t even so much as texted me back. I guess he’s just not coming. It’s already almost midnight.” Harry announced.

They all nodded their heads except me. “I wonder why?” I pretended to be clueless. There was no doubt that he wasn’t coming because I was here.

“By the way, I call dibs on Eilana for midnight kiss.” Harry said suddenly, winking at me again.

I swallowed hard at everyone’s eyes on me. I didn’t react and simply sat there in silence. I looked at Niall whose fists were clenched. I made eye contact with him and smiled slightly, trying to ease his nerves. Apparently it worked because his face softened and he returned the small smile.

“How long?” Liam asked.

Harry looked at his phone. “It’s 11:52.” He said. “Louis and Liam, you guys are just going to have to kiss each other. And Niall, Zayn was supposed to be here but he’s not so just kiss your hand or something.” He joked, laughing at their expressions.

I was feeling nervous inside. I didn’t know how I felt about kissing Harry in front of the guys. I had told him to keep it a secret and keep it away from them. I just don’t feel too good about it.

We chatted for a few minutes. Well, everyone but me. I was being unusually quiet tonight. I had a lot on my mind, and I couldn’t get my brain to slow down for two seconds.

“Two minutes to midnight.” Harry said, looking at me mischievously.

I looked at the ground, feeling the nerves in my stomach. I didn’t want to do this. Not in front of Niall at least. I couldn’t stand the thought to be honest. I had hurt him enough.

“Can I talk to you real quick?” Louis suddenly grabbed my wrist and pulled me up without an answer, dragging me towards the back door of Harry’s house.

“Hey! Where are you taking her? I need her for midnight!” Harry argued.

“I’ll bring her right back! It’s urgent! I’ll be real quick.” He said before leading me out the door and onto the slightly damp grass of the big back yard.

I hadn’t ever been back here before. It was beautiful. Even at night. It was basically a giant garden, surrounded by a wall of tall green bushes that had grown together into a solid wall. There was a fountain in the middle, and the stars could be seen shining brightly. It was gorgeous.

“Why did you bring me out here, Lou?”

He grabbed my hands and looked me in the eyes. “I know it might be selfish of me, but, I want to be your first New Years kiss. Not anyone else. It should be special, and it should be from someone who loves you whole heartedly.” He told me shyly, looking down and up again, smiling sweetly.

I couldn’t hold back the smile on my face. I gripped his hands a little tighter, and stepped a little closer.

We could hear Niall from inside the house shout that it was midnight. I smiled wider as Louis leaned down and kissed me softly. He held my face with one hand, and my waist with the other. I kissed back in longing for him. I couldn’t get enough of Louis’ kiss. I always wanted more. I gripped his face with my hands and deepened the kiss. He seemed a little shocked by this, but kissed back just as passionately. I wrapped one hand around the back of his neck and ran the other through his soft hair. We parted and looked at each other with smiles on our faces. We laughed lightly and I blushed under his gaze.

“Happy New Year, Eilana.”

“Happy New Year, Louis.”

Yep, I’m positively sure that this was the best way to start my new year.

Chapter Text

Zayn's P.O.V

Fucking shit. What did I do? Why did I even go over there? That was such a bad idea and I knew it. Did I do the right thing by storming out? Now she's probably going to go sticking her nose somewhere it doesn't belong and she's going to get into trouble. It's all my fault too. I should have stayed away from her. I should have never opened my mouth.

I pulled up to the house, seeing that there were people here as always. I sighed and got out, feeling like breaking something.

I really wish dad didn't do business at the house.

I climbed the stairs to the door and slumped into the house, not wanting to be here. I walked by my dad's office, smelling the heavy cigar smoke coming from the room. The door was half open and I caught a glimpse of four men in the room with him. I kept walking as it was nothing out of the ordinary. I made my way to my room, throwing the car keys onto my dresser and collapsing on my bed face first.

I hate this. I hate being here. I hate being around my friends. I hate being around Eilana. I hate all of it. I have to hide this from people. My whole life I have to hide it. And I can't even be comfortable in my own house.

I rolled over and sighed. I looked around my room. It was bigger and grander than most celebrities. I had everything I could ever want. Hell, I don't think there's anything I don't have. But I would trade it all if it meant that I could be normal like my friends. I'm so jealous of them. They don't have all the worries about their life like I do. They don't deal with wondering if they'll make it to the next day. And Eilana. She's everything I've ever wanted. She's normal and nice and safe.

Not to mention that I've completely fallen for her. I don't know when it happened, but as soon as I realized that I cared for her, I knew I had to get rid of the feeling. I cannot have her close to me. As much as I want her to be, I just can't let it happen.

I can’t believe I used to treat her the way that I did. If only I had known what happened in the future, I would take it all back. I feel sick when I think about how much I probably hurt her. Let alone scared her. When I saw her with those two guys that night at the club, I felt a fire inside me. I wanted to kill them for scaring and hurting such a sweet girl. I know she would never intentionally hurt anyone. And for anyone to try and hurt her, it enrages me.

I laughed to myself bitterly.

When the hell did I become such a softy? Is this what girls do to you? This must have been what Harry was talking about. I just never thought it would happen to me. Not so soon anyway. I never thought that Eilana would be the one either. What a shock.

I can’t even put my finger on what it is about her that I’m crazy about, but I just am. She makes me feel again. I’ve forgotten what it’s like to really feel full emotion for something. She makes me smile. Whole heartedly. Something I haven’t done in years.

I’ve never liked a girl before. Not like this. I’ve never cared about their feelings before. I know I’m terrible for being such an uncaring jerk all my life, but I’ve never known any different. I never thought about how all the girls I slept with felt. Whether they really liked me or just wanted a good shag, I didn’t give a fuck. But Eilana, I really care. Yes, I was still selfish, but I cared more for her safety than for my happiness.

I must really like her. I really like her. I smiled a small smile at the ceiling.

“I really like her.” I whispered to the empty room.

I frowned shortly after and took a big breath, holding it for no reason other than to entertain myself. I closed my eyes and tried to relax completely. It was dead quiet and I was finding it hard to block out my thoughts with nothing to distract me. But then I heard it. Out of nowhere, the ear piercing sound of a gun being fired over and over again rang in my ears as my eyes snapped open.

I got up quickly, running downstairs to my dad’s office, panting and out of breath as I rounded the open doorway to see him sitting in his chair, feet on the desk, smoking a big fat cigar like always. I sighed in relief and turned to see the lifeless bodies of the four men being dragged out by the men in suits that always stood around our house silently. I ignored the trails of blood that stained the floor and leaned against the wall by the door.

“Thought your old man had finally kicked the bucket, huh?” I heard the low, gruff sound of my father’s chuckle as he looked at me with a smirk. “I thought you would have learned by now that I’m always the one left standing.”

I looked at the floor as I caught my breath. “I’m never going to assume you’re the one still breathing. I have to deal with the fact that when I walk through the door to my own house every day, that my father might be laying in a pool of his own blood, shot through the head. And I don’t even want to think about mum. What would I do then?” I asked him, angry at the life he chose.

He laughed lightly. “Well, that’s the life of a mob boss’s son. I’m sorry, there’s nothing I can do about that.” He tapped the ashes off his cigar. “When you get older, you’re going to have to tell the same thing to your son.”

I laughed sarcastically. “No I’m not. I’m not going to get involved in this anymore than I already am by being your son. I don’t want this. And I sure as hell am not going to start a family while I am involved in this.” I crossed my arms.

He laughed again. “Then you’ll die alone. I’m sorry son, but you’ll be in this until the day you die. That’s the only way out. It doesn’t matter how involved you are, the point is that you’re involved. You know about it and that’s all it takes. You’ll never not know and for that reason alone, you will always be in this business. You know this, I’ve told you a hundred times.”

I sighed at the fact. “I know dad. I just wish it was different.” I mumbled, scuffing my shoe against the slick floor.

“Sit down.” He motioned lightly towards one of the chairs in front of him.

I slumped down into the leather chair, crossing my arms and looking at the front of the desk.

“So that girl at the dinner the other night, is she your friend?” He asked me.

“Um, yeah I guess. We’re not very close. She’s more of a friend of everyone else.” I carried on the conversation like my father didn’t just kill four men. Again, nothing out of the ordinary.

“Well she’s beautiful. And very nice. You don’t like her?”

“No. She’s rather plain if you ask me.” I lied.

“I know you like her, Zayn. It was obvious from the way you were staring at her all night.” He took a sip of his scotch. “The question is, do you love her?”

“…No.” I would have loved to say that was a lie, but I’m not even sure myself.

“Good. You better go after her then.”

“What? Why would I do that?” I was confused.

“Let me give you some advice. Don’t marry the girl you love. If your wife does get killed, you don’t want it to be the love of your life. Let the one you love live their life free from all of this. When you find her, leave her alone. It won’t be easy, but your day to day life will be easier knowing that she’s safe.”

I looked at him in question. “You don’t love mum?”

He chuckled lightly and looked at me. “I do love your mum, but I’m not in love with her. The woman I’m in love with is living her life somewhere far away from me in another country now. And that’s the way I want it. It’s the most I’ll ever be able to do for her.” He grinned but somehow it was still sad looking.

I thought about what he said. He was right. I’ll have to do the same. But I’m not really sure that Eilana is the one. But even if she’s not, I don’t think I could bear her getting hurt anyway. And there’s also no guarantee that she likes me back. I mean earlier she kissed back, but that doesn’t prove anything. I can’t believe that she doesn’t just outright hate me still after all I did to her.

I sighed and got up to leave, making sure to avoid stepping in the blood on the way out. I walked to the bar in the house and poured myself a drink. I gulped it down quickly and poured another. I guess this is going to be my New Years night. I’m sure as hell not going to go to Harry’s where I know Eilana is. It would just be awkward for one thing, and I really need to stay away from her. I don’t know how long I plan to stay away though. Eventually I’ll have to be around her again if I’m going to have any kind of life. I grabbed the bottle of vodka and shuffled slowly and lazily up to my room. I sat down on the floor with my back against the bed. I threw my head back as I downed the liquid in the bottle.

I don’t know what they’re doing at Harry’s right now, but I hope they’re having a good time. I at least want my friends to enjoy life. I hope they have a good New Year. And Eilana especially. I wonder who her New Year kiss will be. I just hope whoever it is, that it’s special for her. If I can’t give her happiness, I want her to be with someone who can.

~

A few days later, I woke up with a killer hangover and the sound of someone banging on my bedroom door. I had been drinking a lot more lately. I was almost getting used to hangovers. I groaned to myself and slowly got out of bed, nearing the door groggily, I stopped and picked up the jeans off the floor and put them on before opening the door.
“What?” I asked sharply at the man who worked for my father.

“There’s an unidentified person at the door, sir. You’re the only one home at the moment and therefore, the only person who can identify them.” He informed me.

I rolled my eyes and rubbed my temples trying to ease the pain as I followed him down the stairs. “Where are they?” I asked harshly.

“They’re at the door, sir. We aren’t authorized to let unidentified people into this house.” He stepped back.

I sighed and looked at the giant clock on the wall. 1:09pm.

Who in the hell…

I opened the door with a less than happy expression. My eyes widened at who was on the other end. “Eilana what are you doing here?! Are you crazy?!” I pulled her into the house quickly, shutting the door and praying that no one saw her come here.

“What? What’s wrong?” She asked, completely clueless.

“You can’t come here, Eilana!” I rubbed my face in frustration.

“Why not? I mean, sorry to show up uninvited, but why can’t I come to your house? Is it a crime or something?” She looked at the men standing around the house.

I laughed at the irony. “Eilana, it’s dangerous to be here! If someone even saw you here your life could be in danger!” I told her frantically.

She gave me a weird look. “Why? Look, I’m sorry for showing up, but I have to talk to you.” She put her hand on her hip.

“Nevermind why! What the fuck did I tell you? I told you to stay away from me, and you come to my fucking house?” I looked at her like she was an idiot.

“Well what else am I supposed to do? I never see you anymore. I need to talk to you.” She repeated.

“And you can’t just text me like a normal person?” I asked.

“I don’t have your number.” She shrugged.

“How do you even know here I live?”

“I asked Liam.” She said simply.

“And you couldn’t just ask him for my number?” I raised my brow at her.

“…I didn’t think about it.” She said in a small voice.

I rolled my eyes and grabbed her by the wrist, dragging her up to my room. I closed the door and locked it. I sat her down on my bed and pointed at her. “Don’t move, don’t touch anything.”

I went into my closet and pulled on a shirt, grabbing my black chucks and slipping them on as I walked back into the room. I put on my coat and grabbed her again, picking up my keys before leaving the room.

“Where are we going?” She asked as I dragged her along.

“Out.”

“Why can’t we just stay here and talk?”

“Because it’s not safe dammit! If anyone showed up right now and saw you... Look, I’m trying to keep you safe, now just let me handle this and no more questions.” I told her sternly as we walked down stairs. I stopped by the front door and looked out the nearest window. It looked clear. “Come on.” I pulled her outside to my car, quickly unlocking it and opening the door for her. “Get in.” I told her.

“Whe-“

Get in.” I said through gritted teeth.

She looked at me a little frightened, but got in without hesitation. I shut the door and jogged to the other side, getting in and cranking it up before high tailing it out of the driveway.

“Zayn, what the hell is going on? Why are you so worried about anyone seeing me?”

“No more questions.” I pulled out my phone, dialing Liam’s number.

“What are you doing?” She asked another question. Surprise.

“I’m calling Liam to meet up somewhere and then he’s going to take you home.” I told her.

“What?! No! I have to talk to you, Zayn.” She protested.

“About what, Eilana?” I sighed.

“About a few things! First of all what the hell is going on, and also about you and me and what’s going on there. We can’t just leave it hanging without talking about it. It needs to be cleared up.” She crossed her arms as if it was going to make me reconsider it.

“What about us? There’s nothing to discuss. There, it’s cleared up. Now you’re going home.” I spoke quickly.

“No, Zayn. I still have questions.”

“I’m sure you do.” I mumbled under my breath.

“What do you mean there’s nothing to discuss? You came to my house a few days ago, told me you liked me, and then you kissed me, twice, and stormed out! And you’re going to say that there’s nothing to talk about there?”

“Yes. I was confused. I’ve figured things out now and I take back what I said. Happy now? There’s your answer.” I lied.

“If you don’t like me anymore, then why are you so concerned for my safety?” She asked knowingly.

“Because you’re still my friend and I still care.” I tried.

She looked at me with a disbelieving face. “Yeah, right.” She said sarcastically.

I groaned and gripped the steering wheel tighter. “Fine, Eilana. I still like you, okay?”

“Then why can’t we talk about it? It’s going to be awkward if we don’t.” she stated.

I knew she was right. “Alright, fine.” I pulled over into a crowded parking lot.

“Why can’t we just go to my house?” She asked.

“Because if we’re being followed, then they would know where you lived.”

She nodded and looked down at her hands. “So… why can’t you just tell me what’s going on? Why would someone be following us?”

I sighed and threw my head back, hitting the seat. “Because it could be dangerous for you to even know. I already told you.”

“Do the guys know?”

“No. They don’t have a clue. I’m sure they think some things are weird about my life or my house, but they haven’t ever said anything to me about it.” I told her honestly.

“They’ve been to your house? Because yeah, the men standing everywhere is a little out of the ordinary.” She joked.

“Well yeah, they have been. But when they come over I ask my father to move them to a different location in the house. Somewhere they won’t be seen. So the guys haven’t seen them like you have.” I explained.

“Oh. So they work for your dad?”

“Uh, yeah.”

“What does your dad do?” She looked at me curiously.

“Too many questions.” I warned her.

“If I don’t know what you’re doing behind my back, then how am I supposed to trust you?” She gave me a sad face.

Oh, fuck. Not the face.

“Eilana.” I ran my hands through my hair.

“I’m serious, Zayn.”

“I can’t believe I’m telling you this.” I rubbed my face, and took a deep breath. “My father is the head of a mob. A really big, powerful mob. And if you get too involved with me, it could mean your life. And I don’t want that, obviously.” I looked to her, waiting for an answer.

She just stared at me in shock. “…You’re joking.” She laughed nervously.

“I really wish I was.” I told her.

“You weren’t joking when you said it was dangerous.”

“I tried to tell you, Eilana. But now you know, and you cannot, whatever you do, tell anyone that you know. Promise?” I asked her carefully.

She nodded her head slowly. “I promise.”

“Now that you now, I can’t be in your life anymore.” I sighed.

“What?!” She turned in her seat and looked at me with wide eyes. “No, you can’t do that! We’re finally friends now and you’re just going to disappear?”

“I’m not going to disappear, I’m just not going to hang around you anymore. After this day, we’re as good as strangers.” I told her.

“No! I don’t want this. I want all of the group to be around. I’ve gotten used to your sarcastic ass and it just wouldn’t be the same without you.” She grabbed my hand and looked at me with sad eyes.

I looked down at our hands. I smiled sadly and took my hand back. “No, Eilana. If I want to ensure your safety, then I don’t have a choice.”

“Yes you do. I’ll be fine, Zayn. Why can’t we just hang out in secret? We just won’t hang around in public together. Wouldn’t that work?”

“I suppose it would. But I really don’t want to take that chance. It’s all or nothing, Eilana.”

“I-I can’t give you everything. I’m not sure that I like you like that. Sorry.”

I nodded my head. “I know. That’s why I’m doing this.”

“But I do know that as a friend I want you around. I do care for you, Zayn. I don’t want you to just leave my life. Please, you can’t do this.” She looked as if she was going to tear up.

“You wanted to know, and I told you. Be careful what you ask for.” I told her as I put the car in reverse and pulled out of the lot.

“Where are we going now?” She asked.

“I’m taking you home. It should be safe now.”

“No! We’re not done with this conversation.” She argued.

I didn’t say anything, just kept driving. She eventually realized I wasn’t going to keep fighting her and she crossed her arms and huffed, clearly mad at me. I drove straight to her house, being cautious of the surrounding people and vehicles.

When we made it there, I walked her to the door. I at least planned on saying a proper goodbye. Even though we would still see each other in the halls at school, I wouldn’t be talking to her anymore.

“I’m sorry about all of this, Eilana.” I started, looking to the ground.

She opened the door and turned around, rolling her eyes. She grabbed me by my upper arm and tried with all her might to drag me into the house. I wasn’t moving an inch.

“What are you doing?” I asked tiredly.

“Come on, please? Just come inside for a minute. Please?” She looked up at me from under her long eyelashes.

I sighed heavily and stepped inside, letting her lead me. “What?” I asked as she closed the door.

“Zayn you can’t do this.” She started.

I rolled my eyes and started to walk towards the door. “If this is all you’re going to say then there’s no point in me staying.”

She grabbed the sleeve of my leather jacket. “No, please. I don’t want to be responsible for you splitting from the group. What do I have to do to make you stay?” She pleaded.

I turned around and looked her in the eye. “The only thing that will change my mind is if you say that you’ll be with me. But I know you won’t do it.” I don’t even know why I’m bothering to tell her this. She’s not going to agree. I know it’s a selfish request.

She looked at me and I could tell she was thinking hard about it. “I just-I don’t know if I can make that promise, Zayn. I-I like Harry.” She stuttered out sadly.

“I know. And Niall. I know I don’t begin to compare to either one of them. I don’t expect you to actually like me back, Eilana. I know it’s a stupid thought.” I told her, chuckling lightly.

“It’s not stupid! Don’t say that! You do compare to them. I’m sure you’re just as good a guy, Zayn. Somewhere in there, I know you have potential to be really sweet.” She hugged my arm, looking at me with doe eyes.

“You don’t know that. What if you’re wrong? What if there’s nothing but bad in me?” I looked down at her.

“I know you’re not bad. Not at heart. I’ve seen you be a good person. I know it’s in there. Even now, you’re trying to be a good person and keep me safe, even though I won’t let you. Don’t you see, Zayn? You’re fighting to protect me. No bad guy would do that.” She said with a sweet smile.

“If that’s true, then you would give me a chance. You might like me back. There might be hope for me then. But there’s not. So please, don’t torture me by giving me hope. Please.” I pleaded.

“Zayn, I hardly know you. I mean, if I got to know you better, who knows? Maybe I would like you. I’ll give you a chance, just please, please, don’t leave!”

I sighed and relaxed the fists that I hadn’t noticed I was clenching and turned to her. “I need you Eilana. All or nothing. Just give me an answer. I know it’s selfish, but I’m a selfish person.”

“…I can give you a chance, I can be here for you, and I can listen to you. That’s all I can promise you.” She said sadly.

I stared back at her, weighing my options. I just have such a weakness against her. I would do anything for her, just to feel something. I just want to feel again.

“Please, Zayn. Understand it from my side. It’s hard for me too.”

That was it. I snapped. Who am I to deny her. I would do anything for her.

“Alright. If this is really what you want.” I said.

“Yes, Zayn.” She smiled up at me, eyes sparkling with happiness.

I smiled back and she hugged me. I hugged her back, just enjoying the warm feeling she gave me. I haven’t felt it in so long. I cupped her face and kissed her lips gently. She responded to it unsurely and I deepened it a little, bringing my hand down to her lower back and tilting my head more. I pulled away but kept my hold on her.

“I hope you realize what you’ve just asked for. If I’m going to stay around, then you’re going to have to deal with me.” I smirked.

She looked dazed as she stared at me quietly. I kissed her cheek softly before winking at her and leaving, shutting the door happily this time.

I was happy for the first time in years, and it was all because of a girl. If anyone would have told me this three months ago, I would have laughed in their face. But here I am, completely smitten and grinning like a fool over a certain girl.

She said she would give me a chance, and I’m going to make sure that I use that chance to its fullest. I don’t think she knows what she’s just agreed to…

Chapter Text

"Hey! What are you two doing in my back yard? Dammit Louis! It's already after midnight!" Harry yelled at us from the door.

We laughed to ourselves and walked back into the house.

"Happy New Year!" Liam's voice chimed at us.

"Happy New Year, Li." I kissed him on the cheek. "You too, Ni." I smiled warmly at him, giving him a hug and a kiss too.

He smiled and returned it. "I hope this year is the best one for you yet." He said.

"Thanks Niall."

"What about me?! Do you not wish me a happy New Year?" Harry whined.

I laughed at him. "Happy New Year, Harry. There, you can move on with your life now." I teased.

"Where's my kiss?" He crossed his arms.

I rolled my eyes and pecked him on the cheek. "Better?"

He shrugged his shoulders and went to the kitchen to get another drink.

~

"Are you sure you don't want me to take you home?" Louis asked again.

I smiled at him. "I'm sure, Louis. Thank you." I hugged him.

"I'll take her home, mate. Don't worry about it." Harry said.

Louis sighed and nodded at Harry, giving me a worried look.

"Bye guys." I waved to them all one more time as they left.

Harry waved them off as well and shut the door. "I believe you owe me a kiss." He said as soon as we were alone.

I looked at him nervously. "Sorry."

"What was up with that?" He asked.

"With what?"

"Giving Louis the kiss that was rightfully mine." He narrowed his eyes.

I furrowed my brow and scoffed. "Harry, I don't belong to you. And what makes you think that we kissed?"

"Oh please, Eilana. I know you did. I'm not stupid." He laughed.

"Well what about it?" I sighed.

"What's up with it? Why are you kissing him? I thought you liked me?"

"I do!"

"Then why? Is there something going on between you and Louis?"

"No. We just... kiss sometimes. I don't know. It's really weird." I failed at explaining.

"I'll say! I don't want you kissing him anymore." He grabbed my hand, dragging me upstairs.

"Harry." I warned him.

"Come on, are you going to tell me I don't have any say in this?" He turned to me.

"Yes." I huffed.

"I know we're not together, but you realize how much I don't like it. Would you be okay with me kissing another girl?" He asked.

I looked to the floor. "...Yes. I don't want you to because I like you, but I don't have the right to tell you that you can't. It would make me jealous, but I would just have to put up with it." I told him honestly.

He rolled his eyes. "Yes, well it does make me jealous. I'm a very jealous person, Eilana. Don't provoke me. I'm not too nice when I'm jealous." He warned.

I was quiet as he turned around and proceeded to drag me to his room. He shut the door and turned to me, a smirk on his face. "Now, I want my kiss."

I looked at him expectantly. “Well, take it then.” I waited for him.

“Don’t you think you owe me one? Come to me.” He motioned me over with his finger.

I walked to him nervously. “Uh, wha-“

“Kiss me.” He said.

I stared up at him and put my hands on his shoulders, steadying myself as I stood on my tiptoes to reach his lips. I wasn’t so sure of myself, but I just went for it anyway. I leaned forward and pressed my lips to his softly. He put his arms around me and leaned down, deepening the kiss. I reached for his hair and played with it as his hands found their way to my thighs. He rubbed them up and down while I rubbed his back slowly. He smiled into the kiss and picked me up, carrying me to the bed. He put me down and climbed over me, pressing his lips to mine again.

I could feel his cold necklace on my skin as it dangled from his neck, causing goose bumps all over me. He put one hand under my chin as the other held him up. I put my arms around his neck and he flipped us over so I was sitting on top of him. I broke the kiss and looked down over his body. I trailed my fingers down his chest until I reached the bottom of his shirt. I gripped the end of it and looked at him. He smirked at me as if encouraging me. I lifted up his shirt, blushing, and he sat up just long enough to help me pull it off.

I admired his body and ran my fingertips down it slowly. He smirked up at me the whole time I stared at him in a daze. I finally looked him in the eyes again and grinned. I leaned down and kissed his lips sweetly. I smiled at him and he rubbed his nose against mine. I kissed along his jaw line, and nipped at his ear while he rubbed my back slowly. I kissed down his neck and lightly bit and sucked on his warm skin, making him moan lowly. Hearing him make those sounds was getting me hot. I smirked at my good work, knowing there would be a love bite there later. I worked down lower until I got to his collarbone, sucking on it. I started to grind my hips softly against him and he moaned my name. I kissed his lips again and he flipped us back over.

“You little tease.” He smirked. I giggled and he kissed me heatedly, clearly turned on now. I tried to catch my breath when he pulled away, but found it hard when his hands started to run down my body and up my shirt. His hands found their way to my chest, massaging it softly. I closed my eyes at the feeling, enjoying his touch. I felt his hand slowly trail lower until I could feel it up my skirt. He rubbed his hand between my legs and I let out a small moan before I realized what he was doing. My eyes snapped open and I looked at him.

“Harry.” I grabbed his wrist and pushed it away.

He looked at me with question. “What?”

“Just, not yet. Please.” I told him, closing my eyes shortly in embarrassment.

He leaned down to my ear and spoke lowly. “Oh, I see. You’ve never been touched before. What a good little girl.”

I opened my eyes to see him smirking mischievously. “I have actually. I’m just not used to it.” I blushed and looked away.

His smile grew wider. “So you’re still a virgin?”

“Of course I am.” I looked at him like he was crazy.

“I just thought after all the time you spent with Niall that you wouldn’t be.” He shrugged.

“It doesn’t matter how long I’m with someone, it matters who it is.” I told him.

“Do you think it could be me? Because I would love to take it from you.” He smirked and kissed my lips.

I blushed and turned my head. “Harry, I’m serious. It’s important to me.”

“I’m serious too. Look, I’m not going to make you do anything you don’t want to, but it won’t hurt anything to just touch either.”

“I know. I just-Give me some time, okay?”

“Of course, love.” He smiled and kissed my cheek.

I sighed and put my hands over my face. I felt Harry roll off of me and heard him sigh too.

“Harry?”

“Hm?”

“What do you like about me?”

He thought for a second. “I like that you’re different. Everyone else is doing what teenagers do, but you do your own thing. You believe in different things and you have your own ideals and morals. You’re nice to everyone, you’re fun to be around, you’re funny. You’re a good person to have serious talks with or just to goof off with. You’re so scared, yet so fearless. You’re always happy, but there’s always a bit of sadness and confusion behind it. I guess I relate to you in that way.” He smiled at the ceiling.

I smiled at him. “That’s quite a list.” I giggled.

“That’s not even half of it.” He smiled back and rolled onto his side. “Can I tell you something?”

“Anything.”

“Well, I know my life might seem perfect on the outside, and I always seem happy, but my family is kind of broken.” He started.

“What do you mean?” I asked with worry.

“My mother, she’s anorexic and an alcoholic. She cheats on my dad all the time, and my dad beats her for it. My father has anger management issues, and he beats me when I’ve done wrong or when I try to protect mum. He also cheats on my mother all the time, but gets angry when she does it to him. My sister, Gemma, she fled the country as soon as she could. She’s going to school in France now. We were actually very close. When she had the chance to leave, she didn’t want to leave me behind but I told her to go. I didn’t want her getting hurt anymore. So now it’s just me by myself, trying to keep this family from crumbling down completely.”

I was speechless as I listened. “Harry, that’s horrible. I’m so sorry. I had no idea.”

He nodded his head with a small grin on his face. “Yep, that’s my life. Behind closed doors anyway.”

“Does anyone else know about this?” I asked.

“The guys do. That’s it.”

“Louis too?”

“Yep.”

“How long has this been going on?”

“Pretty much since I can remember. I was very young when it started.”

I didn’t know what to say so I just pulled him into a hug. He hugged me back and chuckled. “I’m alright, Eilana.”

But you’re not, Harry.

“Don’t worry about it. I’m fine. Just thought you should know about it. Get some sleep, El.” He kissed the top of my head and hugged me to his chest.

I couldn’t stop thinking about it. I was seeing everything in a different light. The past, the present, I was seeing him and his actions and behavior differently now. Eventually I dozed off to him humming softly in my ear as he rubbed my arm.

~

The next day I was cleaning the house when Niall came over. He said he just wanted to hang around since he was bored. I agreed to let him sit around while I cleaned.

He was currently sitting on the kitchen counter while I swept the floor.

“So how did things go with Harry last night?” He asked me out of nowhere.

“Uh…” I turned to him and scratched my head. “Good, I guess. Why do you ask?”

“Just wondered. Louis was really nervous about leaving you there with him.” He said.

“Oh. Well everything went fine.” I told him again.

He was quiet for a few seconds. “Did you guys… kiss?”

I really hoped he wouldn’t ask that question. “Yes.” I said quietly.

He went quiet again. He mindlessly watched me sweep as he was obviously lost in thought.

“Are you mad?” I asked.

He looked at me and smiled. “No, I’m not mad. I know you like Harry, El.”

“You do?” I cringed.

“Of course I do. You went on a date with him, remember?”

“Yeah. I just didn’t think it was that obvious.”

He laughed. “It is. And besides, it’s not like I’m surprised. This was what I was scared of happening the whole time we were together.”

“Does that happen often or something?”

“What?” He furrowed his brow.

“Harry taking your girlfriends.”

“Oh. No, I was just scared he would take you from me because I didn’t want to lose you.” He said.

“Oh.” I didn’t know what to say.

“Turns out I had my eyes on the wrong guy.” He mumbled.

I felt like apologizing again, but I knew it wouldn’t make any difference to him, so I kept my mouth shut. It got pretty quiet after that for a while.

“Hey, El?”

“Yes?”

“Would you maybe, want to go on a date with me?” He asked nervously.

I turned to look at him with a smile. “I would love to, Ni.”

His face lit up and he hopped off the counter, coming over to me. He hugged me and kissed me on the cheek. “Great! How about Friday?” He asked.

“Sounds good.” I told him.

He smiled brightly and kissed me softly and shortly on the lips. “See you tomorrow probably.” He said before hugging me again and leaving happily.

~

As I finished cleaning the house, Louis called me.

“Hello?”

Hey! Just letting you know that I’m free now. Want to hang out?

“Yeah! Come on over.”

I’ll be there in five.

“Alright.”

Love you.

I laughed and shook my head.

“Louis, you’ll see me in a few minutes.”

Love you.

“I love you too.”

I rolled my eyes and hung up.

I decided to get a shower since I had been cleaning all day. I remembered the situation with Zayn, and promised myself I would talk to him about it. I need to understand what he’s talking about. I looked at myself for a minute before walking back to my room, wrapped in a towel. I forgot my underwear though. I walked back in to Louis sitting on my bed.

“Hey, Lou.” I walked to my dresser and got out a set of black lace.

He looked at me and just stared silently for a while with a blank expression. “Are you not wearing underwear?” He smirked.

I looked back at him. “No. I forgot it. So I came back to get it.” I giggled as his eyes looked me over hungrily. “Problem?”

“Nope. Just enjoying the view.” He smirked cockily.

I rolled my eyes and walked back to the bathroom to put them on. I walked back in and threw my towel at him when he kept staring. “Did I say you could stare?” I joked.

“No one could stop me.” He winked.

I blushed and giggled. “Louis, what am I going to do with you?” I shook my head as I picked through my clothes.

“Hopefully you’ll come sit on me.” He joked.

I blushed bright red. “Louis!”

“What?” He laughed.

I put on my black skinnies and a Beatles shirt with a red cardigan. I brushed through my hair and put on a little makeup. I left my hair to air dry and walked over to the bed, sitting next to Louis.

“You look hot.” He smiled cheekily.

I poked him in the cheek. “You are being very naughty today, sir.” I wagged my finger at him.

“I know you love it.” He teased, kissing me on the cheek.

“What you wanna do?” I asked like a kid.

“Hmm. How about we go down to the music store? We haven’t been in a while.”

“Yeah, let’s go.” I stood up and he joined me as we made our way out. I grabbed my jacket, purple beanie and my gray Vans before leaving.

When we got there, we browsed through everything, showing each other stuff and laughing about stupid things. We were looking at an old record when someone approached us. I recognized him from school. One of the popular guys.

“Hey Louis!” He smiled as he did that little bro handshake thing guys do.

“Hey, mate. What’s up?”

“Just out on the town, browsing stuff, shopping. What’s up with you? You out with someone?” He gestured towards me.

“Oh, yeah. This is Eilana. Eilana, this is Max.” He introduced us.

I smiled shyly at him and he reached out his hand for me. I took it and he kissed my hand. “Nice to meet you, Eilana.” He smiled.

“Nice to meet you too.” I mumbled shyly.

“I didn’t know you had a girlfriend?” He said.

“What? Oh, Eilana’s not my girlfriend, she’s my best friend.” He cleared up.

“Oh, sorry. She’s beautiful. How come I’ve never seen her before then?”

“I don’t know. She goes to our school, so I’m sure you’ve seen her before.” He said.

“Really? I must not have noticed you this whole time somehow.” He laughed lightly.

Ouch. Oh well. It’s a big school with lots of people. Maybe that’s why?

“Well, I’ll leave you two alone now. Good to see you again. I’ll probably see you in a few days when school starts back.” He smiled and waved as he walked away.

“Bye, mate.” Louis waved lazily as he went back to the music.

“Am I really that invisible?” I asked him.

“Huh?” He turned to me with a confused face.

“He doesn’t even remember me.” I mumbled.

“You’re not invisible, love.” He hugged me. “I saw you. That’s all that matters.” He smiled and kissed my forehead.

I looked down and frowned. “But it sucks.”

“I don’t want anyone else to see you. I want you for myself. You’re too special to share with so many people.” He laced his fingers through mine and gave me a smile.

“I love you, Lou-Bear.” I smiled back and hugged his side.

“I love you too.” He chuckled. “What are you doing later tonight?” He asked as he flipped through the records.

“Nothing. Want to spend the night?”

“Movie marathon!” He shouted.

I giggled. “Sounds good to me. I could use a good snuggle.” I told him.

~

“Niall!” I shouted as he splashed me with water from the sink.

“What? You had some flour on you.” He winked.

We were in his kitchen and I was making him some cookies.

“I heard you and Louis had a sleepover last night. How come I wasn’t invited?” He joked.

“What? Where did you hear that? And you weren’t invited because there wasn’t room on the couch for you.” I stuck my tongue out at him.

“Louis told me. And how dare you not invite me for such a minute reason.” He stuck his tongue out at me too.

We both laughed and I put the dirty bowl in the sink.

“How come me and you don’t have sleepovers?” He whined.

“Because that’s weird.” I told him.

“But it’s not weird with Louis? Are you saying that Louis is closer to you than I am?”

“No. I’m saying that it’s not weird with Louis.” I laughed. “I didn’t date Louis.” I reminded him.

“All the more reason to be more comfortable with me!” He chuckled.

“Nope. Not the same.” I teased, turning back around.

“I’ll keep my hands to myself.” He promised, wrapping his arms around me.

“Like you’re doing right now?” I smirked.

“This isn’t a sleepover.” He reasoned, kissing me on the cheek.

“That’s true.” I giggled.

He kissed my neck and I closed my eyes at the familiar feeling. He nipped at my weak spot and my lips parted but I stopped myself from making any sound.

“Ni?” I asked, breathless.

“Hm?” He mumbled against my skin.

“What are you doing?” I asked him, trying not to get too lost in it.

He only chuckled and continued kissing up and down my sensitive skin. I gave in and tilted my head, giving him more access. His hands came around my waist and he traced small circles on my hips, pulling me back into him. I groaned as his teeth grazed the skin he had bruised. “Niall.” I mumbled in happiness.

“You taste like candy, El. I could just eat you.” He joked.

I giggled and then my eyes snapped open. “Cookies. The cookies!” I jumped away from him and to the oven, opening it quickly. I sighed in relief when I saw that they weren’t burnt. “You almost made me waste a whole batch of cookies, Ni.” I scolded him.

He shrugged. “I like you better than cookies.”

~

Today was the day that I was going to speak to Zayn. I haven’t seen or heard from him in two days. I’ll just have to go to him. I put on my jacket and called Liam.

Hey, El. What can I do for you, love?

“Hey, Liam. I was wondering if maybe you could give me Zayn’s address?”

Yeah, of course. What do you need it for?

“I kind of need to talk to him about something.”

Alright. I’m not going to ask questions. It’s 119 Wickham Road.

“Thank you, Liam. You’re a life saver.”

Anything to help a best friend.

I could practically hear him smiling over the phone.

“I’ll see you later then. Love you.”

Love you too. Be safe.

“I will.”

I smiled and hung up the phone, sticking it back in my pocket. I slipped on my Converse and headed out the door. I headed straight for Zayn’s house, only to find that it was almost in the middle of nowhere down a long road of trees. I almost didn’t even see the entrance to the path. They must be a secretive family. Or they just really enjoy the quiet of nature.

I walked all the way down the path and up to the front door, where two men in suits stood on the grand porch. They both looked at me and then at each other. They stopped me at the door.

“Who are you?” The one on the left asked me.

“…I’m a friend of Zayn’s. This is his house right?” I asked, now unsure.

The one on the right pulled out a speaker thingy and talked into it. “There is an unidentified female at the door. She is short, brunette, and claims to be a friend of Zayn’s.” He said, never taking his eyes off of me.

I was starting to get creeped out. I stood there uncomfortably and waited for a response with them as they stared me down like a hawk.

Zayn is coming down to identify. Please hold her at the door. I heard the static voice reply.

They ushered me closer to the door and retook their positions. I looked at them weirdly and stared straight ahead at the door. I waited for a few seconds before the door opened.

“Eilana what are you doing here?! Are you crazy?!” A very shocked Zayn pulled me into his house.

“What? What’s wrong?” I asked, completely clueless as to why I can’t come to a friend’s house.

“You can’t come here, Eilana!” He ran his hands through his hair. I took notice of all the other men standing around the house quietly. Like they were guarding something. It was really weird.

“Why not? I mean, sorry to show up uninvited, but why can’t I come to your house? Is it a crime or something?” I looked at him.

He laughed at the irony and explained it to me.

~

“If this is all you’re going to say then there’s no point in me staying.” He started walking towards the door.

I quickly grabbed his sleeve and looked up at him with pleading eyes. “No, please. I don’t want to be responsible for you splitting from the group. What do I have to do to make you stay?” I could feel the water coming to my eyes.

“The only thing that will change my mind is if you say that you’ll be with me. But I know you won’t do it.” He looked down at me.

I thought about it. I really would do almost anything to keep him from leaving. He’s become as much a part of the friend group as everyone else. I don’t want to lose him. I don’t want to lose anyone anymore. Once was enough. “I just-I don’t know if I can make that promise, Zayn. I-I like Harry.” I told him sadly.

“I know. And Niall. I know I don’t begin to compare to either one of them. I don’t expect you to actually like me back, Eilana. I know it’s a stupid thought.” He said, chuckling lightly to himself.

How did he know I still liked Niall?

“It’s not stupid! Don’t say that! You do compare to them. I’m sure you’re just as good a guy, Zayn. Somewhere in there, I know you have potential to be really sweet.” I hugged his arm, looking at him sadly. I was desperate for him to stay.

“You don’t know that. What if you’re wrong? What if there’s nothing but bad in me?” He said, looking at me blankly.

“I know you’re not bad. Not at heart. I’ve seen you be a good person. I know it’s in there. Even now, you’re trying to be a good person and keep me safe, even though I won’t let you. Don’t you see, Zayn? You’re fighting to protect me. No bad guy would do that.” I smiled at him.

“If that’s true, then you would give me a chance. You might like me back. There might be hope for me then. But there’s not. So please, don’t torture me by giving me hope. Please.” He pleaded, looking almost broken.

“Zayn, I hardly know you. I mean, if I got to know you better, who knows? Maybe I would like you. I’ll give you a chance, just please, please, don’t leave!” I begged. I was ready to drop to my knees if I had to.

He sighed and turned to me. “I need you Eilana. All or nothing. Just give me an answer. I know it’s selfish, but I’m a selfish person.”

“…I can give you a chance, I can be here for you, and I can listen to you. That’s all I can promise you.” I said sadly.

He looked deep in thought. I couldn’t tell what he was thinking and it was scaring me.

“Please, Zayn. Understand it from my side. It’s hard for me too.” I told him.

“Alright. If this is really what you want.” He said.

“Yes, Zayn.” I smiled up at him, happy that he wasn’t going to leave after all. I sighed in relief and hugged him.

He hugged me back, and we stayed like that for a while. When he pulled back, he cupped my face and I wasn’t sure what he was doing until he kissed me. I was shocked at it, but even more shocking, it was just a gentle kiss. That was it. Just sweet and gentle. I didn’t know Zayn had it in him. I kissed back, a little unsure of it. He put his hand on my lower back and deepened the kiss. He finally pulled away and looked at me with a smirk.

“I hope you realize what you’ve just asked for. If I’m going to stay around, then you’re going to have to deal with me.”

I didn’t know what to say in response to any of this, so I just stared blankly. He kissed my cheek and winked at me before leaving on a happy note.

I just stared at the back of the door for who knows how long. I did not fully understand what just happened. If I had to guess, I would say that I just agreed to go sneaking around with another guy. At least, that’s how he made it sound. I’m really not sure I can handle this. Three guys? This is too much. I need to talk to someone.

I pulled out my phone and dialed the first number that came to mind. They picked up and I smiled slightly at the voice on the other end.

“Liam? I need to talk to you.”

Chapter Text

"I kind of have an emergency." I told Liam as I collapsed on his bed.

He closed the door behind us and came and sat next to me. "What is it, love?"

I sighed heavily and rolled over so I could look at him. "Well, I need to tell you something, but it has to be kept a secret. I don't even really want to tell you to be honest. But I need help, and I know you can give it to me."

"Okay. I promise it won't leave this room." He smiled at me. "Of course I'm more than happy to help you always, but, how come you didn't go to Louis? Don't you always talk to him about everything?" He questioned.

"Well, yeah mostly. But I didn't want to involve him in this. It would just be... awkward. Not to mention that I'm, well, ashamed for lack of a better word." I told him.

He raised his eyebrow at me. "Ashamed? Whatever for?"

I sighed again and took a deep breath. "Well, you know how I said I would never like Harry?" I asked slowly.

"...You like Harry." He answered for me, a small part of his voice laced with surprise.

"Yeah. And to top that off, I still like Niall I realized."

"Oh." He said, making a wide eyed face.

"Yeah. And now I've kind of gotten involved with Zayn. He said he likes me, but I'm not sure that I like him that way. I mean, I really like him as a friend, but I don't know him well enough to know if I like him romantically, you know?"

"Do you like Harry or Niall more?"

"I don't even know. I can't tell. They're so different, but I like them both." I rubbed my forehead.

"How involved are you with Zayn exactly?"

"Like, I don't know, we kissed a few times?"

"Oh. Well, how do you feel about it?"

"I'm fine with it. I even kind of like it. I'm just not sure if it's a physical thing or if I might actually be starting to like him."

"Maybe you should give him a chance then. You know, get to know him, spend more time with him. If that's what you want, anyway."

"Here's the problem, I'm kind of involved with Harry and he doesn't want me being with anyone else." I told him sheepishly.

"And when you say involved?"

"Like, we kind of have a thing, but we're not together." I tried to explain.

"Ah. I get you. So then you must really like Harry. Maybe you should stick with Harry since you clearly like him a lot." He shrugged.

"But he does get on my nerves with all of his nagging sometimes. He seems really possessive." I chewed on my lip.

"Everyone's going to get on your nerves at some point. And have you ever considered that if you two were actually together, that maybe he wouldn't nag you about it?"

"...Well no."

"See? It can be fixed. If you like someone enough, you can get over the things that annoy you about them. If you can't, then you probably shouldn't be together."

"So you're saying that I should go with Harry then?"

"Yeah, I guess so. If he's the one you really like."

"But, I have another problem." I bit my lip.

He looked at me, waiting for an explanation.

"I have a date with Niall tomorrow. How am I supposed to explain that to Harry?"

He looked at me with a funny face. "Well, that is a problem."

"Yeah. You see my emergency." I huffed.

"Well, there is always the option of just dating all of them, and then picking the one you like best after some time."

"Dating all of them?" I gave him a strange disapproving look.

"Yeah, you know, not like being a couple, but just dating. Like going out together, not being together. It's not cheating if you're not together. People do it all the time. There's nothing wrong with it. That’s kind of the point of a date. Just go out with each of them a couple times and pick the one you think you like most after that." He explained.

I thought about it for a minute. "Yeah, I guess you're right. Surely Harry will understand."

"Of course he will." He smiled and patted my back sweetly. “He has a fair chance, so he can’t complain.”

I nodded and put my feet in Liam’s lap, sighing heavily. “I guess we’ll just see how this goes. It should be interesting, that’s for sure.”

~

“Cotton candy!” I squealed when I saw it. I looked at Niall and smiled brightly.

“If you want cotton candy, then I will get you all the cotton candy you want.” He smiled back and led me to it, buying one.

We decided to make it an amusement park date since we both loved them. I was having a wonderful time and I could tell that Niall was too. I was definitely falling for him harder as the day went on. I couldn’t stop myself. I had forgotten how happy I was when I was with him.

“Niall?” I asked him as we sat down on a bench to eat our sugary snack.

“Yeah?” He looked at me curiously.

“What is it about me that you like?” I was curious how different his answer would be to Harry’s.

He thought for a second. “I like you because you make me happy.” He looked at me with a grin. “I like you because you’re everything I ever wanted in a girl. I think you’re perfect for me. You always know how to make me happy. You’re genuine, sweet, smart, and beautiful. You always make sure others are happy before you are. You’re innocent in a way, but totally dirty minded. You’re totally adorable, and in my eyes, you’re perfect. But I guess the reason that I like you so much, is because I love you. If that makes sense?” He chuckled lightly and put his arm around me.

I giggled along and poked him in the cheek. “Yeah, it makes sense.” I smiled at him.

He picked off a piece of the cotton candy and licked the end, then stuck it on my nose, laughing at me. I giggled and crossed my eyes looking at it. I picked it off and ate it, playfully glaring at him. He glared back and we both laughed. We finished eating our treat and got up to throw away the stick that remained.

“Where to next?” He asked, linking his fingers with mine.

I put my finger to my chin in thought. “Hmm, what about that one?!” I pointed to the giant roller coaster in front of me. It was huge and the tallest one in the park. It had a million upside down loops and turns. I looked at Niall with eyes the size of plates.

“Let’s go!” He sprinted towards it with me in tow.

~

I yawned as we pulled up to my house, leaning my head against the window.

“Tired, princess?” He smiled over at me as he put it in park.

I picked my head up and nodded tiredly. “That’s all the excitement I can take for today.” I mumbled.

He smiled and patted my thigh softly before getting out and coming around to open my door. He put his arms under me and picked me up with ease, carrying me into the house.

“I can walk just fine.” I told him, laying my head on his shoulder.

“I know. But I like carrying you.” He smiled and carried me to my bedroom.

I was in and out of sleep already by the time he set me down on the bed. My eyes kept fluttering shut as he took off my Toms, then my jacket, and my cardigan. He lifted me up and pulled back the covers before laying me down gently and tucking me in.

“Good night, princess.” He kissed my forehead.

I opened my eyes at his soft voice and looked up at him. “Thank you, Ni.” I grinned at him and put my arms out. He realized what I was asking for and leaned down for a hug. When we parted he put his finger under my chin, kissing me on the lips softly before smiling at me through the dark.

“I’ll see you when you wake, sleeping beauty.” He said before disappearing as my eyes got heavier.

~

“Wake up, love!” I heard the loud sound of a familiar voice as my room filled with light.

I squinted at the sudden change and rolled over. “Louis.” I mumbled into my pillow.

“Aw, come on. I want to see your pretty face.” I could practically hear him making a pouty face.

“No, Louis. I want to sleep.” I mumbled again, not even bothering to look at the time. But it didn’t matter, it was a Saturday.

“But, I’m lonely.” He sounded like a little boy.

“Well, you’ll have to be lonely for another hour then.”

He made a whining sound and huffed. I thought maybe he had gone away, but then I felt a heavy weight on the back of my thighs.

“Louis, what are you doing?” I turned my head barely, still hugging my pillow.

He didn’t give me an answer. I rolled my eyes and collapsed back on my pillow. I let out a squeal when I felt him slap my ass. “Louis!” I shrieked.

He chuckled and did it again. “Don’t you roll your eyes at me, missy!”

“Louis Tomlinson!” I tried my hardest to sound intimidating. Apparently it didn’t work.

“Are you going to get up and spend time with me then?” He asked mischievously.

“No.” I said strongly. “Ow!” I reached back with a hand to cover myself from his antics. He grabbed it quickly and chuckled.

“Are you going to stop being naughty, or am I going to have to teach you a lesson about being lazy?” He smiled at me, eyes twinkling in amusement.

“I’ll get up! I’ll get up! Just don’t spank me again!” I said quickly, squirming from under him.

“I’m kidding, love. You can sleep. I just wanted to do that.” He laughed.

“You’re fucking crazy.” I told him, laying my head back on the pillow. “And mean. That hurt, you know.”

He rolled off and laid next to me. “Aww, I’m sorry. Do you want me to rub it?” He smiled devilishly.

I rolled my eyes and shook my head, dismissing his weirdness. I closed my eyes and sighed, trying to relax. I felt a hand on my bottom, rubbing softly in circles. I looked at Louis quickly to see him laying next to me with his eyes closed.

“Louis.” I said lowly.

He opened one eye and smiled at me again. “What?” He asked innocently.

“What are you doing?” I giggled slightly.

“Making it feel better. Does it feel better?” He asked in a childish voice.

“Yes, thank you.” I smiled at his craziness.

He stopped and pulled his hand under his chest. “Sowwy.” He frowned. “I didn’t mean to hurt you.”

I laughed. “It didn’t really hurt, Louis.” I told him.

“So you lied.” He grinned.

“What?”

“You just wanted me to rub your bum, didn’t you?” He winked.

I groaned at his joking and turned my head to the other side. “You’re ridiculous.” I mumbled before drifting off again.

~

I woke up and rolled over to see a wide awake Louis. He was staring straight back at me with a soft smile on his lips.

“Get enough sleep?” He asked.

“Yeah. Have you just been awake the whole time?” I asked curiously.

“Yep. Just been laying here, watching you like a creep.” He smiled brightly.

I laughed and rubbed my face. “What time is it?”

“It’s 12:15.” He brushed the hair out of my face.

“Oh. How long was I asleep?”

“About an hour.”

I nodded and got up, walking to the bathroom. I took a quick hot shower, spending a few extra minutes thinking about things. I thought back to last night with Niall. I found myself smiling at the thought, and smiled even more. I got out and dried off, putting my underwear on. I walked back to my room to see an outfit already picked out for me on the bed. I rolled my eyes and started to get dressed.

I slipped on the dark skinnies and American flag T, putting on the denim jacket over it. I sat down on the bed next to Louis and put on the blue Toms he left out for me. I walked to my jewelry box and put on the necklace he gave me and put my hair up in a messy bun. I swiped on a bit of makeup and turned around with a smile.

“What should we do?” I asked him.

“Uh, maybe-“

He was interrupted by the front door opening and shutting loudly. We looked at each other with wide eyes and he jumped off the bed and in front of me protectively. My bedroom door swung open and in walked Harry. He looked at the two of us and raised his brow.

“What are doing here so early?” He asked Louis.

“What are you doing here so early?” I countered. “And who said you could just walk into my house unannounced?”

“Louis walks into your house whenever he wants, why can’t I? And I need to talk to you.” He crossed his arms.

I rolled my eyes. “Because you’re not Louis. And what do you have to talk about?” I crossed my arms, mirroring him.

He gave me a hard face and looked to Louis. “Do you mind?” He asked him.

“Uh, I’ll just be in the kitchen if you need me.” He whispered to me and left, closing the door behind him.

I continued to stare at Harry. “So?” I waited.

“What the hell is he doing here?” He snapped.

I raised my eyebrows at him. “He’s always here. He practically lives here. Why? Wait, let me guess. It bothers you?”

“Yes, it does. What do you guys do here all the time?”

“We hang out. You know, like friends do?”

He rolled his eyes and shook his head, as if clearing his mind of those thoughts. “Anyways, I came here because I heard you went on a date?”

“Yes. With Niall. And it was amazing. I’m not actually with you Harry. There’s nothing wrong with it.”

He gritted his teeth and remained silent.

“I know you want to say something, Harry. Just say it.”

“I just-I want you to myself. Don’t you get that?” He came closer to me, putting his arms around me. He rested his hands on my ass and pulled me closer, looking down at me with a pout. “I’ve never been good at sharing.” He mumbled as he lowered his lips to mine.

I pushed him away slightly. “Sharing? You are notsharing me. I’m not an object.”

He sighed and looked away in annoyance. “I didn’t mean it like that. You know what I meant.” He tried to kiss me again, but I pushed him again.

“No, I don’t. Harry, if this is just another game to you, I need to know. I don’t want to waste my time.” I told him sadly.

He looked me in the eyes with a very serious expression. “Eilana, you know this is not a game to me. You know I really like you. You’re the only girl I’ve ever liked, so don’t go saying that this isn’t anything to me.”

I chewed my lip for a second and sighed. “Alright. But, just please give me some freedom to figure this out. I’m only becoming more confused as to my feeling about each one of you and I need to spend some time with you all one on one to figure it out. Okay?”

He took in a big breath. “Okay.” He nodded.

“Thank you for understanding.” I hugged him.

“I just have one question. When you say you all, who exactly do you mean?”

I looked around the room. “If you must know, I mean you, Niall, and Zayn.” I told him.

He bit his lip and pulled me back into him again. “…Alright, fine.” He said reluctantly.

“Are you scared because now you have competition?” I teased.

He smirked down at me. “Actually, I’m not too worried about it.” He leaned down and put his forehead against mine.

“Oh really? And what makes you so sure?” I smirked back.

“Because I seem to have a way with your body and mind, and I know I can make you mine with a few right touches.” He slid his finger up my spine slowly and softly, causing my legs to shake slightly. He noticed this and smirked wider, showing his teeth.

I pulled myself together and stood tall at him. “If that’s true, then why haven’t you just taken me already?”

“Because I’m letting you have the freedom to choose. I believe we just went over this.” He smiled into my neck.

I giggled and let him kiss his way down to my skin, eventually coming back up to my lips. “Harry?” I asked between short kisses.

“Yes?”

“I like you. I’ll be honest, sometimes I don’t want to like you, but I can’t help it.” I smiled.

He smiled back and kissed the corner of my mouth before slipping his hand under the back of my shirt. I gasped at the cold touch of his hand trailing up my skin. “Good. Because if you didn’t like me back, I don’t think I could go on living.” He said before nibbling on my ear.

“Don’t you think that’s a little dramatic?” I asked.

He chuckled softly and I could feel my hair standing on end with the sound of his throaty laugh and his touch against my bare skin. His other hand started to venture down my thigh. My whole body was shivering and I was getting weak in his hands.

“And just what are you doing?” I asked playfully.

“I’m giving you something to think about later. When you’re all alone at night, thinking about me and my hands, what they would do to you. Damn, the things I would do to you.” He whispered in my ear.

My breath caught in my throat at his words. I swallowed nervously and blushed madly. “Harry.” I mumbled, wide-eyed.

“Am I interrupting something?” Louis asked from the doorway.

My eyes snapped up at him in surprise. “Louis!” I said, shocked and embarrassed. “Uh…”

“Not at all.” Harry said, looking back at him, hands still all over me.

I softly pushed him off of me and stepped back. “Um, what did you need?” I asked Louis, still brain scrambled.

He looked at me weirdly. “Nothing. I’ve just been waiting in the kitchen for the last fifteen minutes. I wanted to make sure everything was alright here, but clearly it is.” He wiggled his eyebrows and looked down.

I didn’t know what to say. I was too embarrassed to even look at Louis.

“Yeah, we’ve got it all sorted out. Haven’t we, El?” Harry patted me on my ass softly with a mischievous smile. He knew he was making both of us uncomfortable and he was enjoying it.

I rolled my eyes upon the realization. “Is that all, Harry?”

He frowned at me. “Yes. Do you wish me to leave?”

“That would be great. Louis and I actually had plans before you barged in.” I informed him.

He looked a little hurt but I gave him a face and he understood it wasn’t personal. “Right. Sorry. Carry on then.” He smiled at both of us and patted Louis’ back as he walked out.

After the door shut, the whole house was dead quiet and filled with awkward. Louis and I looked at each other, both of us trying painfully to come up with anything to say to the other.

“So uh, you and Harry?” He finally asked.

“Well, no.” I answered shyly.

“No? It sure looked like it to me.” He mumbled under his breath.

“It’s hard to explain. We’re not together though.” I told him.

He nodded his head slowly. “Right.”

We both looked at the floor as silence fell upon the room again. I kept thinking of something to say to him, but nothing was coming.

“It’s okay, you know?” He said.

“What?”

“That you like Harry. I know he really likes you, so that’s great.” He tried to sound happy but it wasn’t coming across like he wanted.

“Really?”

“Yeah. I kind of guessed that you did. You’ve been acting differently toward him lately.”

“Sorry for that. I did not intend for you to see us, um, me, like that.” I apologized.

He chuckled lightly and looked at me funny. “Why are you apologizing? There’s nothing to be sorry for, is there?”

“I guess not.” I laughed awkwardly, ignoring that his smile was forced.

After another short silence, he spoke up in a more cheery voice. “So, how about we go somewhere?”

“Yeah, that sounds good.” I agreed.

~

Later that night, Louis had gone home because of Family matters and I was left alone at the house because I was just too lazy to think about calling anyone to see if they wanted to hang out. So I’m just laying on my bed, browsing the internet when my phone buzzed beside me. I picked it up and read the screen.

Zayn

Can I come in?

I squinted at the words to make sure I was reading them right.

What is he talking about?

Zayn

Come in where?

I waited a few seconds before it buzzed again.

Zayn

Your house? Where else…

I got up from my bed and looked out the window to see his car sitting in the driveway and him leaned against it smoking. I couldn’t help but notice how good he was looking in his leather jacket with his scruffy face. But I only admired for a minute before going to the door and opening it.

“Are you coming in?” I called out to him, drawing his attention.

He smirked slightly when he saw me and put his cigarette out before walking over to me, and right past me. “Is your mum home?”

“No.” I answered carefully.

“Good.” He said, looking around.

“Why do you ask?”

“Because I need to know. I don’t want your mum catching me doing something bad. I don’t want a bad reputation with her or anything.” He explained.

“Oh.” I grinned at the thought that he cared about something like that. “What would you do in my house that could be so bad?” I asked.

He turned around and looked at me with a devious smile. I raised my brow at him and he stepped closer, taking my face in his hands and kissing me passionately. He pulled away and chuckled at my stunned expression. “Stuff like that.” He smirked.

“So uh, what do you need?” I asked him.

“I’ve been thinking. Since you’re the only person outside of my family that knows what’s going on, you’re the only person I can talk to about it.” He said.

“Oh. So you just want to talk?” I grinned.

“Yeah. Maybe talking to someone is what I need. I’ve just kept it to myself for so long, I feel like I need to tell someone.” He scratched the back of his neck nervously.

“I’m happy that you came to me about this. I would be glad to listen to you, Zayn.” I smiled at him.

“You would? You mean, I’m not bothering you?” He asked shyly.

“Not at all!” I chuckled.

He gave me that crooked smile of his. “Thanks. I was worried I would be a bother to you, but you’re the only one I can come to.”

“I understand.” I smiled warmly at him and took his hand. “Come on.” I led him to the couch and sat down, pulling him down next to me. “Whenever you’re ready.” I told him.

“So, basically I just need to vent.” He started. “I don’t even know where to start.” He laughed lightly.

“Well, tell me how you feel about it. How do you feel about your life being this way?” I tried to help.

He scoffed bitterly at no one. “I hate it. I hate all of it. I didn’t choose this, and I don’t think it’s very fair that I have to be part of it. I want out, but there’s no getting out. No matter what I do. And if I ever want to have a family, they’ll be in danger too. It’s not what I want. I just want a normal life. A normal life, with a normal family, and normal teenage problems.” He shook his head in frustration.

“It’s not fair, Zayn. And it really sucks that you have to live with this.” I felt horrible for him.

“You don’t know how lucky you are. Your biggest problem is worrying about what people at school say about you, or what you’re going to do once you graduate. Those things don’t even cross my mind. You know what my smallest problem is? It’s making sure I don’t run into another gangs goons so I don’t get killed. There is no normal walk along the sidewalk for me. There is no peaceful stroll in the park. Everywhere I go I’m a target. Even though I don’t do anything, or have anything to do with it. I’ve seen men killed in my own house, Eilana. Dozens of times. Do you know what it’s like to watch dead men dragged out of your house? It’s horrible. It haunts me at night. I can’t even relax in my own house. I can’t relax anywhere. My whole life is just one big stressful lookout for trouble.”

I never thought about it like that before. It must be harder for him than I can imagine. “That’s terrible. I’m so sorry.”

“Yeah, it fucking sucks.” He laughed bitterly. “I’m so jealous of all of you guys. You have no idea. I would give everything I had to be so normal.”

I didn’t know what to say, so I just hugged him. I hugged him as hard as I could. He was unresponsive at first, but then he hugged me back. He put his arms all the way around me and held me tightly. I teared up, knowing that he had never been able to talk about this with anyone his whole life. And the fact that he had to deal with this when he was only a small boy. And it doesn’t seem that he’s ever able to be happy.

I kept myself close to him after he pulled away, knowing he could probably use a cuddle. “Zayn, can I ask you some questions?”

He looked down at me shyly, not use to being this vulnerable in front of someone. “Um, sure.”

“What’s your favorite color?” I asked him with a small smile.

“What?” He laughed lightly and looked at me funny.

“Just answer. I want to know.” I told him.

“Red, I guess.”

“Mine too!” I giggled. “What’s your favorite movie?”

“What is this?” He asked curiously.

“I’m getting to know you better. If we’re going to be close then I need to know you and your favorite things. Likes, dislikes. You know, all that stuff.” I smiled.

He looked at me weird but with a smile. “Alright. But you have to tell me yours too.”

“Okay.” I agreed.

We spent the next couple of hours talking about anything and everything we could think of. By the end of the night, I felt like I had known Zayn for years. I knew most everything there was to know about him and vice versa. We were tangled up on the couch and just chatting about nothing in particular when he leaned down and placed a soft kiss on my lips. He lit up with a smile upon seeing that I was smiling too. A comfortable silence fell between us, and I realized after a while that he had fallen asleep. I smiled up at him and laid my head back on his chest, closing my eyes as well.

I’m so happy we got to talk about all this. I feel infinitely closer to Zayn now. And I’m happy that I could be there for him. I’m happy that I could help anyone at all. It seems like I’m always the one needing help, so it was nice to return the favor for once. I just hope that somehow things get easier for Zayn. After tonight, getting to know him and what kind of person he really is, he doesn’t deserve any of this. He’s a sweet, smart, struggling boy, just like the rest of them. Only, he has to deal with so much more.

I’m not sure I can handle this though. I want to help him, but I don’t know how much I really can. But he’s my friend now, and I promise, that I’ll be here for him. No matter what. Even if it means getting involved…

Chapter Text

"Morning, love." Louis greeted before kissing my cheek.

I smiled and shut my locker. "Morning, love." I imitated.

He furrowed his brow at me and laughed. "How is it you've been here for almost two years, and you still can't do a proper British accent?" He teased.

"Shut up, Tomlinson. I'm not good at accents of any kind." I admitted.

"I don't know, you seem to be pretty good at the one you have." He joked.

"Hah hah." I pretended to laugh dryly at his smart ass joke. "This isn't an accent. This is how I talk. You're the one with the funny accent." I poked his chest.

He chuckled and shook his head like a little boy. "No, no. You're the one with the funny accent. You're in England now, love. You're the outsider, not us." He corrected with a grin.

I narrowed my eyes at him. "I do not have a funny accent."

"You don't. To be honest, I find it quite sexy." He winked.

I rolled my eyes and slung my book bag over my shoulder. "You're weird." I pushed him slightly as I walked past him.

He caught up quickly and put his arm around my shoulders. "So, are you excited about being back in the hell hole?" He asked cheerily.

"No. School can suck my imaginary dick." I said plainly.

Louis looked at me with slight shock and laughed. "Well, you have a few choice words, don't you?"

"You can't even imagine." I said lowly.

He chuckled and nodded his head. "Yeah, I'm so ready to be out of here. For good." He said.

"You and me both, Lou. Although something tells me I still won't be getting away from the drama."

"Yeah, drama kind of follows you everywhere you go. It doesn't really stop at high school." He shrugged.

"Ugh. I haven't even made it to my first class and I'm ready for the day to be over." I complained. "What are you doing after school? Please say hanging out with me."

He gave me a sorry look. "I would, love, but we have family over, remember? I promised mum I would spend some time at the house today."

I nodded slowly. "Oh yeah. That's fine. I'll just hang out with someone else then." I stuck my tongue out at him playfully.

He feigned hurt. "Sorry! You know I would rather spend my time with you." He said.

"Would you?" I asked, doubting him.

"Of course! If I could, I would buy a place for us. Just me and you, all the time, doing whatever we want all day." He smiled as he imagined it. I found myself smiling too.

"That would be the best." I agreed.

“I’m going to do it, Eilana. Once we get out of here, we’re going to live together and have the best fucking time of our lives. One day. I promise.” He smiled at me and kissed me on the cheek.

I giggled and nodded my head. “That sounds wonderful.”

“I’ll see you later, love.” He hugged me before walking into his classroom.

“Later.” I waved and kept walking. Eventually I got to my class. I walked in with a quiet sigh and took my seat next to the boy who always looked at me like I had three boobs. Of course, like everyday, he gave me a disgusted look as I sat down.

“Still here I see.” He said rudely.

I ignored him and kept staring blankly at the black board. I had learned not to look at the people here unless you want them to scoff and give you rude looks. I thought I was going to scream before the class was over, and it was only the first one of the day. I finally heard the bell ring and I jumped up and walked straight out of there.

As I was walking the hall, I saw Zayn coming my way. I wasn’t sure how he would act towards me here. After everything that happened between us, I was hoping it would be different, but I wasn’t expecting too much. I wasn’t even sure if I should go up and greet him.

Would he be mad? Would he snub me in front of his other friends?

The other day when I woke up, Zayn was just gone. After that whole night of sharing our lives with the other, he just left in the middle of the night. This was the first time I was seeing him after that night. I decided not to say anything. Just to be safe.

Although I couldn’t help but stare at him out of curiosity. I wasn’t even sure he would notice me. But I kept my gaze on him anyway. Once we got closer, he looked my way. I was getting nervous, thinking I would be rejected any recognition, but to my surprise, he smiled at me. And it was a kind smile. One I had never seen from him before. I smiled back, but that was it. He simply held my gaze until we passed each other. We didn’t say a word, or wave, but it was enough. After that, I walked happily to my next class. I couldn’t get his smile out of my head. It was so nice to see him looking like that. I had never seen him smile like that before. His whole face just lit up with it.

I took my seat and sat there silently, waiting for class to start. I was going to get a headache from all the chattering of the girls around me. It didn’t take long for me to realize it was me they were talking about. I rolled my eyes and tried to block it out.

“Like, what is she wearing? Jeans and a jumper? Really? She’s so plain and boring.” The girl with blonde locks said, looking at me from the corner of her eye.

“And she’s not even wearing heels. Look at her shoes! Vans? She’s so plain looking. She’s barely even wearing any makeup. Does she think she’s pretty or something? If anyone needs the help of makeup, it’s definitely her.” The second girl joined in.

“Not to mention how weird she is. No wonder Niall dumped her, she’s bloody insane. Have you seen the way she treats Harry? She must be mental to refuse him like that.” The third added.

“I know! If Harry asked me for anything, I would give it to him. I can’t believe she just snubs him.” She looked at me with harsh eyes.

“Well apparently they’re friends now. What the hell is up with that?”

“She’s so stupid. If I had Niall for a boyfriend, I would do whatever it takes to keep him happy.” The blonde smirked at her friends as they agreed.

“I bet you the reason he dumped her is because she wasn’t a good shag.” The other one laughed.

“I don’t think she gave him any at all! I mean, look at her, she’s obviously such a prude. I bet she’s never been with a guy before.” The blonde wiggled her eyebrows at me and popped her gum.

I rolled my eyes again and sighed, putting my head in my hand. “At least I’m not rude like you bitches.” I mumbled just loud enough for them to hear.

They all looked to me with shocked faces. “Excuse me?! Who the hell do you think you are?” The blonde asked.

I raised my eyebrow at her. “I’m just a plain, boring, prude.” I grinned sarcastically at them.

“At least you know it, bitch.” She laughed meanly along with her friends as they sat down in their seats.

I saw Liam walk in. He spotted me immediately and smiled, walking towards me.

“Hi Liam!” All the bitches screeched at him, pushing their boobs out at him as he walked by.

He faintly acknowledged them and came straight to me, giving me a hug. “Morning, El.” He rubbed my back as he gave me a long bear hug.

I hugged him back and smiled at him when he let go. “Hey, Liam.”

“Having a good day so far?” He asked.

“It could be better.” I pointedly looked at the girls giving me glares from in front of me.

He looked at them strangely and back to me before shrugging and smiling again. “Well I hope it gets better for you.” He patted my shoulder before walking over to his seat.

“Why are you talking to her, Liam?” One of the girls whined.

“Yeah, why are you wasting your time on someone like her?” The other whined.

Liam gave them a very unpleased look and turned back to the book bag on his lap. “Because she’s my friend, and I love her.” He said simply not even bothering to look at them.

I love you, Liam. Why don’t you love me?” The blonde asked.

“Because you’re a terrible person. You should be lucky for anyone to love you. All of you girls. You think I don’t hear you tormenting my friend, but I do. And I recommend you stop doing it.” He gave them looks that made them sink into their seats in shame.

I raised my eyebrows at the scene and smiled slightly to myself. I looked at Liam and he smiled at me sweetly. I mouthed a thank you to him and he smiled brighter in reply, going back to his book as the teacher walked in.

Maybe this day will get better…

~

I was on my way to lunch when another group of girls who everyone knows don’t like me, passed by me in the hall. Only, as they passed, one of them bumped into me so hard it threw me forward and onto the ground. I had to put my hands out to keep my head from hitting the ground. I looked up at them as they giggled at me. I sighed angrily, tired of all the bullshit today.

“Hey! You better apologize for being such little shits!” I heard a familiar voice as someone grabbed my wrist and pulled me up. I looked up to see that curly mop of hair and an angry face under it.

They all stopped giggling and looked at him in fear. “We’re sorry Harry.” They all pretended to pout.

“Not to me. To her.” He demanded of them.

They all turned to me with mean looks upon their face. “Sorry.” They said coldly, turning to leave finally.

“You alright, love?” Harry asked me as he hugged me to his chest.

“Yeah, I’m fine. Just sick and tired of being treated like shit.” I told him, holding back tears.

“I know, El. I wish there was something I could do to stop them.” He gave me a sympathetic look.

“It’s okay. It’s enough to know that you’re there for me at least.” I smiled up at him.

He returned the smile. “Let’s get to lunch.” He guided me by the small of my back.

I sat down at the table in between Niall and Louis. “Hey guys.” I greeted tiredly.

“What’s wrong, love?” Niall asked as soon as he looked at me.

“Nothing. Just dealing with bitches.” I held my head, feeling a headache coming on.

Niall put his arm around me and pulled me into him. “Who was it?” He asked me, pretending to be tough.

“It was a bunch of girls, Niall. You’re not going to go mess them up.” I rolled my eyes and smiled.

Harry sat down across from me with his food, tuning into the conversation.

“If I hear those girls talking about you one more time, they’ll be getting quite the talking from me.” Liam said.

“What do they even talk about?” Niall asked.

“Just the same as always. How I’m weird and boring, plain, ugly. You know, the same things I always get.” I shrugged.

They all looked at me with faces of confusion. “They’re just jealous, El. They’re just mad that the only girl they’re jealous of is the girl that isn’t rich.” Liam said.

“You can say poor, Liam. It’s okay. It’s not like I don’t know.” I smiled slightly at him trying to be sensitive.

“Liam is right though.” Louis chimed in. “Don’t listen to them, babe. They couldn’t be more wrong about you.” He hugged me, smushing me between him and Niall.

“Don’t worry about it, guys. I’m fine.” I smiled around at all of them.

“It’s not okay, Eilana. They’re bullying you.” Harry said.

I raised my eyebrow at all of them as they all realized the irony of what they said.

They looked at each other with slight guilt before turning back to me. “Well, the point is, it’s wrong. I don’t care what you say, I know it’s hurting you.” Niall said.

“It’s really not a big deal. Can we just talk about this later? I’m getting a headache.” I told them. I really didn’t want them feeling bad for me.

They all dropped it and Zayn showed up. “What’s up?” He asked clueless as he sat down next to Niall.

“Nothing.” I replied quickly, not wanting Zayn to know about it too. I looked down at the table in front of me.

“You’re not eating?” Louis asked.

“Nah, not hungry.” I shrugged. I was hungry, I just didn’t feel like eating at the moment.

“Come on, you have to eat something.” Niall said, shoving his fork full of food at my face.

“No thanks. I’m just really not hungry.” I tried again.

“It doesn’t matter if you’re hungry or not, you need to eat.” Liam argued.

“I’ll be fine.” I sighed, slightly frustrated.

“Eilana.” Harry warned. “Do we have to force feed you?”

I rolled my eyes at them. “Fine. I’ll eat an apple or something.”

Harry threw his shiny red apple in my direction. “You better eat it.” He looked at me sternly.

I bit into it immediately, enjoying the fresh taste. “Happy?” I asked him.

“No, but it’ll do.” He returned to his own food.

~

“How are you feeling? And be honest with me.” Harry said as I laid out on his bed.

“Like shit. I know I act like it doesn’t bother me, but you guys are right, it does. I can’t help but feel so worthless around all of them.” I told him, sighing.

He frowned at me from his dresser. “I’m sorry, love.” He came to the bed and crawled onto it slowly and sexily, situating himself over me. “Maybe I can make you feel better. Because you don’t deserve to feel that way.” He leaned down and pecked me on the lips softly. “Maybe I can make you understand that you’re special, and words are only words.” He kissed me again, longer this time. “I don’t want my baby to feel that way. You need to know how much you mean to me.” He purred, his lips softly grazing mine.

I put my arms around his neck and pulled him down to me. I couldn’t take his teasing. He happily deepened the kiss, capturing my bottom lip between his, he pulled at it gently, smiling as we both opened our eyes. “Impatient are we?” He questioned.

“Don’t tease me, Harry.” I warned him, my breathing ragged.

“As you wish.” He smirked, leaning down and kissing me with passion.

He got heavier as he took the weight off his arms. His hands found my own and he laced his fingers through mine. His lips felt so good. They were soft and warm, just like his hands. He stroked the back of my hands with his thumbs as he kissed me sweetly. I bucked my hips up into his, letting him know I wanted more. He got the message quickly and began slowly rolling his hips against me. I gripped his hands tighter as I groaned at the friction. His lips moved to my jaw, leaving a trail of wet kisses down my skin. He nipped at the weak spot on my neck, and I whimpered at the feeling. I turned my head to the side and he took full advantage of exposure to my neck, sucking, licking, and whispering naughty things against my skin.

“Harry.” I moaned out. “More.” I pleaded, licking my lips.

“Are you begging me?” He teased.

“Yes! Now stop being cocky and pay me more attention!” I growled at him in frustration.

“Now you know how I feel all the time.” He chuckled lightly.

I dug my nails into his back and bit my lip. He smirked and moved his large hands to my breasts, softly massaging them as he continued to roll his hips and kiss my neck. He growled at me as my nails slowly scratched down his back. He kissed me with lust, and I could feel the bulge in his jeans growing harder. I stopped myself from smirking against his lips, and tugged softly at his hair instead. He groaned and licked my lips and I parted them slowly for him. His tongue found its way inside my mouth and his hands traveled the curves of my body. That’s when his bedroom door flew open and we both shot up in surprise.

“Hey I wa-…Oh. Sorry. I didn’t know you were here Eilana.” Liam apologized awkwardly.

“Well she is, so if you could just leave that wou-“

Liam cut Harry off, not paying attention to him. “Niall and Zayn are on their way.” He informed us, not taking his eyes away from me and my probably disheveled look.

“Okay.” I said simply, trying to smooth myself over nonchalantly.

“I invited Louis as well, but he said he had family in town.” He scratched his head as he took a seat on Harry’s couch.

“Yeah, he told me.” I nodded my head, trying to catch my breath as inconspicuously as possible.

Liam kept glancing at us from time to time, mostly me though. I could tell he was feeling uncomfortable. I looked beside me to see a very frustrated Harry Styles.

“Oh come on, mate. You knew we were coming over.” Liam shrugged when Harry gave him a dirty look.

“Can you come back later?” He asked with a fake smile.

“No. I’m already here, I’m not leaving until I leave.” He said, playing with the fabric of the couch.

Harry rolled his eyes and flopped back onto the bed with a huff. “Cock-blocked. Again.”

I giggled quietly and patted his arm. “Better luck next time, Harry.” I winked at him.

He looked at me from the corner of his eye and gave me a devious smirk.

“What are you all doing in Harry’s room?” Niall asked from the doorway.

“Ni!” I jumped up and ran to him, throwing my arms around him. I’ve felt so lovey-dovey towards him lately. He was just so sweet.

“Hey.” He kissed my cheek and threw an arm around me. “Why don’t we go to the theater and play some games or somethin’?”

I looked at Harry still laying on the bed with his head propped up. He wasn’t too happy about my reaction to Niall. “Sure.” He said unenthusiastically, getting up and walking right past us.

“You up for some games, baby girl?” Niall asked me cutely.

“Of course! Where’s Zayn?” I asked as it popped into my mind suddenly.

“He’s on his way. Should be here any minute.” He led me towards the theater.

As we were passing through the foyer, the door opened to Zayn. He looked at Niall, Liam and I. “Where are you all going?” He asked as he shut the door.

“To the theater.” Liam answered, continuing through the house.

“You still owe me a rematch.” Niall pointed at Zayn seriously, walking in the direction of the others.

“Yeah, yeah. You’re still going to lose.” He chuckled.

“Hey, Zayn.” I waved at him shyly.

He looked at me and a warm smile adorned his face. “Hey, Eilana.” He walked to me and hugged me, slightly unsure of his actions. But I hugged him back tightly and he relaxed into the hold.

I pulled back and looked up at his tall frame. “How’s your day been?” I asked with a smile.

“It was alright.” He replied.

I nodded my head and looked down slightly at his chest. I felt his fingers come softly under my chin and he tilted my head up to look him in the eyes. “You look so beautiful right now.” He mumbled.

I smiled and blushed lightly. “Thank you, Zayn. You look pretty too.” I teased.

He cracked a big smile. “You’re so silly.” He said, chuckling at me and brushing my hair back.

I smiled at him and he looked around before leaning down to kiss me sweetly. I was still shocked at how gentle he was. And his lips, they were so soft and inviting. I gripped his upper arms softly as he cupped my face in his hands. He ran his fingers through my hair and pulled away to look me in the eyes.

“I could kiss you forever.” He smiled down at me and licked his lips.

I blushed at his words and looked down, hair falling in my face.

“Are you guys coming?” We heard Niall yell from down the hall.

We looked at each other and chuckled. “Yeah!” I yelled back.

We joined everyone else and I sat down next to Niall. “Give me that controller!”

~

I stepped out of my shoes once I got into my house and set my stuff down on the kitchen table. I sighed and ran my hands through my hair, leaning against the counter. I decided to get a shower. Maybe that would help take my mind off of all the hate I was getting lately.

I stepped under the warm water, relaxing as my body temperature rose. I was in there for at least half an hour before I got out and dried off, slipping into something comfy. I was planning to spend the rest of the night lounging around the house, lazing by myself. I looked at the clock on my bedside table as I entered my room. 10:49. I sighed and listened to how quiet the house was. I was home alone again, as usual. Although I didn’t mind, but I really missed my mom sometimes. After putting on my black lacy underwear set, I slipped on my red pajama shorts and Louis’ white button up, only bothering to button a few of the buttons in the middle.

I walked to the kitchen to make a cup of tea when there was a knock on the door. I stopped in my tracks and furrowed my brow.

Now who would be coming over this late? Louis? Probably not because he’s with family. It’s probably Harry.

I walked to the door and peaked though the slim window beside it, but all I could see was a shadow. Whoever it was, they were standing very close to the door. I felt a little unsure about opening the it, but I did it anyway like the idiot I am.

I raised my eyebrow at who stood in front of me. They raised their head once the door opened and looked at me with eyes wide.

“Zayn?” I mumbled in question to myself.

“Holy shit, El. What are you wearing? And why are you wet?” He looked over me hungrily, licking his lips.

“I just got out of the shower.” I informed him shyly, trying to cover myself. “What are you doing here?” I tucked a strand of hair behind my ear.

“I couldn’t stop thinking about you.” He locked eyes with me, stepping inside, causing me to take a step back. He shut the door behind him, never breaking away from my gaze. He came towards me and grabbed my waist, looking down at me with his bottom lip between his teeth. “Fuck, you look so sexy. You’re dripping wet.” He slid his hands around to rest on the small of my back. “I need you, Eilana. I need you so bad.” His lips quickly crashed against mine, kissing me lustfully.

I was taken aback at first, not expecting him to just show up like this and initiate something. But I kissed back and wrapped my arms around his neck, playing with his hair at the nape of it. His hands found their way to my ass, grasping it firmly in his palms. He kissed the corner of my mouth, and then my cheek, and my jaw, my neck, and all the way down to my collarbone. I made small whimpers as he sucked at my skin. I knew there would be marks later, but I was not going to stop him.

He skillfully undid the buttons to my shirt with one hand, and parted from my neck to look at me. Once I felt the shirt drift open, I quickly grabbed the material and pulled it closed, looking up at him with worry and shyness. He smirked and grabbed my hands, pulling them away from my body, letting the shirt drift open again. He looked down at my exposed skin and his face lit up with the look of sin. “Damn. You’ve been hiding this the whole time?” He eyed me cheekily.

“Zayn!” I squealed, trying to wriggle free of his grasp.

He smirked mischievously at me and bent down, keeping my hands in his still, he leaned forward and slowly licked up my stomach, looking up at me the whole time. I blushed bright red and giggled. “Zayn! Stop!” I smiled like an idiot as he neared my chest. He stopped as he got to my bra and came back up, towering over me once again. He backed me into the wall slowly and picked me up and put my legs around his waist, pinning me between him and the wall. I moaned as he pushed his crotch against mine, breathing hotly down my neck.

“Zayn?” I asked, out of breath.

“Yeah?” He asked back, trailing the tip of his nose up my skin.

“Promise me you won’t take it too far?” I asked, a little embarrassed.

“Just tell me when to stop.” He whispered in my ear.

I nodded hastily as he continued to slowly grind against me as he kissed me again, this time slower and more sensual. His fingers were gently squeezing my ass as he held me up. I couldn’t stop the soft sounds and heavy breathing coming from my mouth as the friction between us was growing. The material of these shorts was so thin and his jeans were slightly rough against my bare inner thighs. I could feel his five o’ clock shadow on my skin as he kissed me, but I liked it. He groaned lowly as the friction was starting to get to him too. I could feel his erection against my heated entrance. He broke the kiss and looked at me with glazed over eyes. “You make me crazy.” He mumbled against my lips. I smiled at his words and kissed him sweetly. He moved a hand around to my stomach, slowly trailing down my abdomen with one finger. He stopped at the waistband of my shorts and traced the front of it with his finger. My breath caught in my throat as I looked down at it. He started to slip one finger into the top of my shorts when I quickly grabbed his hand.

“Zayn, wait.” I said quickly, looking up to his eyes.

He stopped and looked at me with understanding. “I’ll be right back.” He said as he put me down gently.

I looked at him confused before watching him go into the bathroom and shut the door. I sat down on the couch and sighed in relaxation after all the excitement. Although, I was definitely sexually frustrated now. I tried to brush it off and forget about it, but then I heard Zayn. He was moaning and groaning loud enough to be heard. He certainly wasn’t being shy about it. My face turned the shade of a tomato when I heard him call out my name and then suddenly become quiet. I put my face in my hands, not even being able to show my face to the empty room.

He walked back out, looking like he didn’t just jack off in my bathroom. I couldn’t bear to look at him. I was still blushing like mad.

He chuckled when he saw me and sat next to me on the couch. “Hey, look at me.” He spoke softly.

I shook my head quickly in protest.

He laughed and took my hands in his, prying them off my face. “What are you blushing about? It’s not like that’s the first time I’ve done that while thinking of you. And I’m sure plenty of other blokes have too.” He smirked at me.

“You’re not shy are you?” I asked knowingly.

He laughed lightly. “Definitely not.”

I rolled my eyes and pulled my feet up onto the couch, cozying into it. “Was that all? Aren’t you going to leave now or something?” I looked at him.

“Why would I do that?” He asked, confused.

“Isn’t that how this works?”

He raised his eyebrow. “No, no. This is not that kind of relationship. I would never use you like that. I’m not going to just up and leave you. I actually like spending time with you, you know?” He put his arm around my shoulder, pulling me into his chest.

I smiled and leaned on him comfortably. “So what do you want to do?” I asked him.

“Really, I just want to chill. The guys always want to be doing something, but I just want to sit here with you and do nothing.” He replied.

“Sounds good to me.” I said, staring at his hand that rested on my knee.

We sat there doing nothing for a while, occasionally talking, and I fell asleep to him playing with my hair.

~

I woke up that morning alone. In the same spot on the couch, but alone with a blanket draped over me.

I walked to school this morning. Even though all of the guys insisted on driving me, I just wanted to walk. Every now and again I liked to just walk for a while.

I made it to my locker and things seemed to be going well so far, but it was a little early to be judging.

I raked though the stuff inside my locker and closed it once I got everything sorted. I looked to the tall frame leaning against the locker next to mine. “Yes, Harry?” I smiled at him.

“How are you this morning? Because you look lovely.” He smiled and hugged me.

I giggled at him and rolled my eyes. “I’m good, thanks. You?”

“Splendid.” He smiled brightly at me as we walked towards our classes.

I stopped into the restroom and told him I would see him later. When I exited back into the hall, it was practically empty as I made my way to class again. As I traveled the stairs, I ran into a group of five girls. Brittany among them. She hated me with everything she had. She couldn’t even look at me without making a disgusted face and scoffing.

I sighed lightly and tried to ignore them as I walked past, but one of them grabbed me and threw me into the wall. “Who the hell do you think you are to be wasting Harry’s time?” She looked down at me as I lay slumped against the wall.

I didn’t say anything as I tried to get up and ignore it once more. Another one of them kicked me in the stomach, and another one grabbed my hair and pulled roughly.

“I would advise you to stay away from that group of boys unless you want to get seriously hurt. I have connections, and I will use them to make sure you stay away from the men that are rightfully ours. That includes Louis.” She snapped.

“I’m sorry but I can’t do that.” I said boringly, trying to stand again once I got the one girl to release my hair. “So I’ll just be going now.” I said with a fake smile.

“Are you saying you don’t agree to stay away from them? Because we have our ways.” She looked at me with eyes narrowed, and lips pursed in an angry face.

“I’m afraid so.” I told her as I stood.

“Then you’re going to learn the hard way.”

Chapter Text

I laid on the cold floor of the school as they kicked me and pulled my hair. They slapped me, slammed me against the wall, punched me. It was an outright catfight, and it hurt. I was trying to defend myself earlier on, but once I realized it wasn't doing anything for me, I just gave it up completely. So now I'm laying here, trying not to let the tears slip as they beat me like a punching bag.

They finally backed away and gave me some space. "I take it you got the message? So you'll stay the hell away from our men now." Brittany scowled. "While we're on the topic of you staying away from people, why don't you just go lay down in a ditch and die? That would be doing everyone a favor." She gave me a bitch face as her friends all laughed.

I sat up and leaned my back against the wall. I could feel the blood trickling from the corner of my mouth, but I didn’t bother to stop it. I kept my head down, hoping they would finally just leave me be. My head was throbbing and my entire body ached from the kicks. I could already feel the bruises forming.

“What the hell is going on here?”

They all went dead silent at the new voice. I looked up to see two very big brown eyes filled with concern and anger.

“Zayn?” I said barely above a whisper as I looked up at him.

“Are you okay?” He asked as he bent down next to me, checking me over gently.

“I’ll be fine.” I told him weakly.

His face hardened in pure anger before he turned around to look at the other girls. “Someone better explain. Now.” He growled through gritted teeth.

They all looked at him silently, scared of saying a word to him in his angered state.

“Someone answer me!” He yelled at them.

They all flinched and stepped back a bit. “We were just passing by when we saw her sitting like this! We were going to help her before you showed up!” The one in the light pink top said.

“Don’t lie to me!” Zayn roared.

“She was being-“

“Shut the fuck up! I don’t want to hear your excuses! I know what you did! Do you think I’m an idiot?! Huh?! Get the fuck out of here before I do something terribly wrong. And I better not catch any of you even looking at her meanly again! Don’t assume you’re safe just because you’re girls!” He growled.

They all scuttled away quickly and shaking with fear. He came closer to me again and bent down to my level. “You’re not okay.” He said sadly as he looked me over.

“I’m fine, Zayn.” I brushed it off and tried to stand, failing when my head started to pound.

He caught me quickly and put his arm around me, holding me up while he pulled out his phone and texted someone.

“What are you doing?” I asked him as I eyed the phone in his hands.

He didn’t answer me but instead picked me up and started carrying me somewhere. “Come on, we have to get you some help.”

“Please don’t take me to the nurse! I don’t want any of the authorities here thinking I got into a fight.” I begged him.

“I thought you would say that. Don’t worry, I’m not taking you there.” He said.

“Where are you taking me then?” I asked curiously.

He didn’t answer me. He just kept looking straight ahead as he walked. Eventually we rounded a corner and I saw Liam standing outside of a classroom. I furrowed my brow at the thought of why he would be standing in front of the room and not in it. Zayn stopped once we got to him and he looked me over with a horrified face.

“Are you okay?” He asked softly.

“I’m fine, Liam.” I gave him a weak and painful smile.

“Could you just tend to her and make sure she’s okay? I don’t really want to be seen with her outside of school. Or really even in school.” He told Liam.

I was slightly hurt at first, but then I realized he was just saying it to not seem too suspicious in front of Liam. He couldn’t exactly say he can’t be seen with me outside of school because someone might put a price on my head. That would raise some questions.

He held me out to Liam, waiting for him to take me. “I thought maybe your dad could help her or something. She doesn’t want to go to the school nurse, but it’s not bad enough to go to the hospital either.”

“Yeah, of course. No problem.” Liam said, taking me in his arms. He smiled down at me sweetly but sadly. “You’ll be okay.” He said softly.

I rolled my eyes with a small smile. “I told you, I’m fine.” I laughed lightly, stopping when I felt the sharp pain in my ribs.

“Thanks.” Zayn said quietly before leaving.

I watched him walk away and remembered that I forgot to thank him. I’ll have to do that later.

“Let’s get you out of here.” He said before bending down and carefully picking up my book bag that Zayn left on the floor in front of us.

Liam carried me out to his car and set me in it gently before hopping into the other side and driving me to his house.

“Is your dad even home?” I asked him. I felt like I was being a bother and I didn’t like it.

“No, he’s at work. But I can take care of you. I know enough from listening to my father. As well as doing my own research.” He told me.

“Research? Why are you researching medical stuff?” I asked him curiously as he picked me up and carried me to the front door.

“Because I want to be a doctor.” He told me simply.

I smiled slightly as I looked at him. “I didn’t know that. How come you never told me before?”

“It never came up.” He shrugged as he carried me upstairs and into a room I had never been into before.

It was a doctor’s office. A really nice one at that. He set me down on the patient table and went across the room to retrieve some things.

“I didn’t know this was here.” I thought aloud.

He turned his head at the sound of my voice before continuing his search for things. “Yeah. It’s my dad’s, obviously.” He answered absent-mindedly.

“Cool.” I mumbled, looking around.

He finally turned around and walked back to me. “How do you feel right now?” He asked me, examining me up and down.

“I feel terrible. My head is pounding and my whole body aches. My ribs hurt whenever I so much as breathe, and the taste of blood in my mouth is just horrid.” I told him.

He looked at me with his sad puppy eyes. “What exactly happened to you?” He asked quietly as he brushed the hair from my face.

“Zayn didn’t tell you?”

“Only that you needed my help.”

“You mean you didn’t even know what had happened and you still skipped class? What if it was something stupid and small?” I raised my brow.

“You are much more important to me than school, Eilana. It doesn’t matter how small the problem is, if you need me then I’m here for you. No questions about it.” He smiled sweetly at me and rubbed my cheek with his thumb.

I smiled back. “Well, I was just on my way to class when a group of girls attacked me for being friends with you guys.” I put it as simply as I could.

“What? Do you know who these girls were?” He asked me.

“Not all of them. I know one of them was Brittany though. She fucking hates me.” I told him.

“It’s not hate, it’s jealousy. Jealousy drives people to do worse things than hate often times.” He grabbed the warm, damp wash cloth and began gently cleaning the blood off my face. “What did they do to you?”

“They punched me, kicked me, pulled at me, slapped me, threw me around, knocked me into the wall, and a few other painful things that I can’t remember right now.” I tried to recall.

“Hmm. It hurts when you breathe you said?”

“Yeah, when I breathe deeply.” I nodded my head lightly, careful not to rattle my brain any more than it already was.

Once he finished cleaning me up, he dabbed something onto the tiny cut above my left eyebrow, and then some on the cuts on my hands from their fingernails. I didn’t even realize how messed up I was until he started to doctor me. I had scratches everywhere and they had ripped my clothes.

I couldn’t help staring at Liam. He was so concentrated. It was cute. He looked like a real doctor. I smiled at the image in my head. It was the perfect job for him.

He took my jacket off carefully as not to hurt me. “Where do you hurt the most?” He asked.

“My ribs, my head, and my jaw.”

“How does your head feel exactly?”

“Like someone is repeatedly hitting it with a lead pipe.” I said.

He raised his eyebrow at me and nodded his head in understanding. “Right.” He reached over and grabbed something and a glass of water. “Take these.” He handed me two small tablets.

I took them quickly and set the glass down next to me. “So, is there anything wrong with me?” I asked.

“I don’t know. Haven’t checked yet.” He chuckled lightly.

“Oh, right.” I smiled sheepishly.

He got quiet and blushed slightly. “Um, can I get you to take off your shirt?” He asked shyly.

I nodded and lifted my shirt over my head carefully, setting it next to me. I started to blush as he stared at me. I could tell he was trying not to stare but he was having some trouble. He finally put on his concentration face and began gently feeling around my ribs.

“Can you raise your arms for me please?” He asked softly.

I raised my arms off of my sides and flinched when his fingertips pressed into my skin. He looked up at me. “Sorry. This isn’t going to feel too good I’m afraid.”

He kept pressing into my ribs and I tried my best not to flinch so he wouldn’t feel bad. I could tell he wasn’t too pleased about hurting me. After a little while he stepped back and looked me over with a thoughtful face.

“Well, the good news is that you don’t have any serious injury’s. The bad news is that your ribs are bruised and you’re going to be feeling that for a while.” He bit his lip as he looked at me.

I nodded my head and sighed, flinching at the pain. “What about my head?” I asked.

He picked up a tiny flashlight and shone it in my eye, then he asked me how many fingers he was holding up and continued to slowly wave them side to side, making sure I followed them with my eyes. I passed all the tests just fine and he gave me a small reassuring smile.

“It’s just a side effect of being knocked around so much. It should feel better in a few minutes. Looks like you’re alright.”

“Thank you Doctor Payne.” I teased.

He laughed lightly and rubbed the back of his neck. “Ironic, I know.” He rolled his eyes.

“It’s the perfect name for a doctor.” I giggled.

He leaned against the counter between my legs and looked down at me, eyes narrowed with a smile on his lips. “Hey! Are you making fun of me?”

“Maybe.” I looked to the side with a smile. “But really, I think you’ll make a great doctor.”

His face lit up. “Really? Thanks.”

“So, can I put my shirt back on now?” I giggled.

He nodded his head. “Feeling better, love?” He asked me softly as he tucked some hair behind my ear.

“A little. Thank you, Liam.” I smiled thankfully at him and gave him a hug.

He hugged me back but gently, making sure not to squeeze me too hard. But he held me so protectively. I always felt safe with Liam.

“So, back to school?” I raised my brow at him.

“School? No, no. You’re not going back to school today. Not like this. You just need to relax.”

“Oh. What am I going to do all day?” I tilted my head to the side.

“Well, whatever you want.” He smiled at me as he put his hands on either side of me, leaning against the counter.

I smiled back at him and kissed his cheek softly. “Really Liam, thank you. You always help me with everything. I don’t know what I would do without you.” I giggled as he scrunched up his face.

“It’s nothing. I just love you and I want to make sure you’re always happy and healthy.” He kissed me back on the cheek.

I felt so close to him right now. I just wanted him to know how much I really appreciated him. I hugged him again, but this time I held onto him and put my head on his shoulder. “I love you too, Liam.”

He put his arms around me so sweetly, as if he was protecting me from something. These were the best hugs.

“I think your hugs are a cure, because I feel a lot better when I hug you.” I mumbled into his shoulder.

He laughed lightly and stroked my hair calmingly. “Then I’m your teddy bear. Hug me as long as you need.”

We hugged for a good minute before I felt it. The tear that rolled down my cheek without warning. I tried to stop the others from coming, but it was useless. I’ve needed to cry for a while now. So I just let it out. I don’t even know where it’s all coming from. I felt fine earlier.

Liam noticed I was crying and started to rub circles on my back, shushing me softly and mumbling sweet things into my hair as he kissed the top of my head.

“It’s going to be alright. I’ll make sure they don’t bother you again, okay? Don’t worry, love.”

“Everyone hates me, Liam.” I sobbed.

“Everyone doesn’t hate you. And besides those people don’t matter. They’re just empty souls going nowhere and being mean. But you have all of us who love you. And we love you more than anything. I mean, I do at least. You’re special to me and I won’t ever stop caring about you. You’re one of my favorite people and I cherish your friendship above all else. Okay? So stop beating up on yourself. There’s plenty of people who love you more than you understand.”

“Thank you. That means a lot. You’re right, they don’t matter.” I told myself more than him. It didn’t stop the tears however. “But it still hurts.” I mumbled.

“I know, baby girl. I’m sorry. No one deserves this.” He kept hugging me.

I gripped into his shoulders as I cried out all of the stress of everything. He picked me up and I put my legs around him as he carried me down the hall and into his room. He sat down on his couch and set me in his lap. He continued to comfort me the whole time I cried. After a few minutes of that, I finally stopped. But now I was exhausted. I laid my head on his shoulder and leaned against his chest, my arms still around his neck. I played with his hair as I laid still against him, listening to him breath softly. The house was dead quiet and it’s the only thing I could hear.

“Liam?”

“Yes, love?”

“Don’t you ever get tired of me crying on your shoulder?”

“Of course not. I’ll always be here for you, El. You know that. I do wish you didn’t have a reason to cry so much though. It makes me sad to see you hurting.”

I yawned and let my eyes drift shut for a second. Liam must have noticed because he moved us to the bed and tucked me in, laying beside me on top of the covers. “You need to rest. You haven’t had the easiest day. You’ll feel better after a quick nap.” He smiled at me.

I nodded my head as I stared into his chocolate eyes. “Will you sing to me, Liam?” I asked shyly.

“Are you sure you want that? It doesn’t sound so pleasant.” He chuckled.

“But I love your voice, Liam. Please?” I tried again.

He sighed and cleared his throat before singing Lost by Michael Buble.

If I’d only knew,
The days were slipping past,
That the good things never last,
That you were crying,

I closed my eyes and smiled as I heard his voice fill the room softly. I loved his voice. It was so smooth and relaxing.

Summer turned to winter,
And the snow it turned to rain,
And the rain turned into tears upon your face,
I hardly recognized the girl you are today,
And, God, I hope it’s not too late,

Cause you are not alone,
I’m always there with you,
And we’ll get lost together,
‘Till the light comes pouring through,
‘Cause when you feel like you’re done,
And the darkness has won,
Babe, you’re not lost,
When your world’s crashing down,
And you can’t bear the thought,
I said, babe, you’re not lost,

Life can show no mercy,
It can tear your soul apart,
It can make you feel like you've gone crazy,
But you're not,
Things have seemed to change,
There's one thing that's still the same,
In my heart you have remained

He swore he couldn’t sing, but I knew better. I felt him play with my hair as I drifted into a peaceful sleep.

~

I woke up to an empty bed. I sat up and looked around, flinching when I moved too quickly. I blinked a few times, trying to get adjusted to the dark. I searched the room for Liam, but he wasn’t anywhere in sight. I started to panic. I’m not sure why. I wasn’t scared of the dark or anything like that, but I just didn’t want to be alone right now.

“Liam?” I called out, surprised at how scared my voice sounded. “Liam?!” I called louder.

“I’m right here, love. Don’t worry.” He smiled at me as he walked through the door and flipped on the light. I saw that he was carrying a tray full of stuff. “I made you lunch. I know you must be hungry after all that.” He set it down in front of me on the bed.

“You didn’t have to do that.” I blushed slightly at the treatment he was giving me. I felt like such a bother.

“Of course I did. It’s not a big deal. Now eat.” He commanded nicely.

It looked and smelled delicious. I had no idea he was such a chef. I took a bite of it and it was amazing. “This is really good.” I told him. “Since when could you cook?” I asked him.

“Since I taught myself in the fifth grade.”

“Is there anything you don’t do?”

He thought for a second. “I don’t do flower arranging.” He joked.

“I could’ve guessed that.” I giggled.

“What do you want to do?” He asked.

“I don’t know. What time is it?”

“It’s almost 1:00. Want to watch a Disney movie? I know that will cheer you up.” He wiggled his eyebrows.

“You know me too well.” I laughed.

“What do you want to watch?”

“How about Up?”

He smiled and put it in, dimming the lights before taking a spot next to me.

I finished my meal while we watched it, and put it aside before curling up next to Liam for warmth. I was already crying at the movie. I always forgot how much this movie got to me. Liam smiled down at me and kissed me on the temple, grabbing my hand. I smiled up at him through my tears and snuggled into his shoulder.

~

“Liam?!” We heard a distant voice from somewhere in the house. We looked at each other and then we heard it again. But this time, it was a different voice. “Liam?!”

Suddenly the door opened and in came all four of the boys. They looked to me immediately and rushed over. Well, all but Zayn who was laying low in the back. Louis was the first one to me.

“Are you okay?! Oh god! Please tell me you’re okay!” He said hurriedly.

“I’m fine, guys.” I said clearly, shutting them up temporarily. “Liam took care of me and I’m just fine.”

They all looked at me in silence for a few seconds before going crazy again.

“What happened?” Harry asked.

“Who did this?” Niall asked.

“Why did they do it?” Harry asked again.

“Why wasn’t I notified?!” Louis asked, irritated.

They all spoke at once. I could hardly understand them all. “Guys, guys! Calm down.” I paused. “It was just a bunch of girls, and they were threatening me to stay away from you guys, but I refused. Zayn and Liam handled the problem.” I explained to them.

“What are we going to do about this?” Louis asked the guys.

“I don’t know, but we’ll figure something out. I already promised her we would.” Liam said.

“Well until then, who’s going to take care of her?” Zayn asked.

They all looked at him weird and he shrugged. I giggled at the sight. They had no idea.

“It’s my job. I’ll take good care of her.” Louis said happily.

“Alright then. If you need any help or anything, just let me know.” Liam said.

“Yeah, same goes for me.” Harry and Niall both agreed.

“Thanks guys.” I smiled at all of them. I was so lucky to have them all as friends.

Louis picked me up effortlessly from the bed and Liam handed him my things. “Feel better, love.” Liam said before laying a kiss on my forehead.

Niall kissed my hand and Harry kissed my cheek. As we were walking out, Zayn gave me a sweet smile and a nod. I knew exactly what he meant and I smiled. “Later, guys.” I waved to them over Louis’ shoulder.

~

As I was lying in my own bed that night, I was thinking about Liam.

I was always thanking him for something. He was always there for me, no matter what the consequence. I knew without a doubt that he loved me dearly. He made it very clear and it made me feel better about myself. If only by a little, it still helped. I didn’t give him enough credit. He was always so sweet to me, and here I’ve been completely blind to it, taking it for granted. But the truth is, I’m lucky to have someone as loyal and sweet as Liam for a friend. I really didn’t deserve him.

“What are you thinking about?” Louis asked as he entered the room, laying down next to me.

“Nothing.” I answered absent mindedly.

“Feeling alright?” He asked as he pulled me onto his chest.

“Yeah.” I sighed, listening to his heartbeat through his chest.

“Are you sleeping here tonight?” I asked.

“I’m not leaving until you kick me out, love.” He chuckled.

I smiled at the sound of his laugh. He rested his hand on my back and it warmed my whole body. I closed my eyes at the feeling of him all around me. The soft rise and fall of his chest beneath me, the warm hand on my back, the fingers tangled in my hair, the comforting sound of his voice, the familiar scent of his cologne, and his warm breath that fanned my neck.

“Louis?”

“Mhm?”

“I love you.”

I could almost hear his smile. “I love you too, Eilana.”

Chapter Text

I flinched as I tried to shift my body weight on the couch. Giving up, I sighed loudly in annoyance. "This sucks so many balls!"

Louis looked at me and chuckled. "Sorry, love. It'll get easier as the days go on." He looked at me sadly as I pouted like a child. "Need some help?" He offered.

"I can do it, Lou." I insisted.

He looked at me with a 'yeah right' face as I tried again to move myself. I never realized until now just how much I use my torso to move myself. Apparently a lot, because it seemed I couldn't do anything without bothering my ribs.

After about twenty seconds of moving extremely slow to try and avoid hurting myself, Louis smirked and got up. He put his arms under me and lifted me up without hurting me.

"No! Louis I want to do it!" I whined.

"Well I don't want you to hurt yourself." He replied, sitting down in my spot and putting me down in his lap.

I gave him an exaggerated mean face but cuddled up to him comfortably. "I can never do things for myself when you're around." I fussed.

He laughed lightly at my argument and looked down at me. "I will treat you according to your maturity level. And right now, I would say you're about five." He teased.

I narrowed my eyes at him and slapped him lightly on the chest. “Hey!” I giggled.

“I’m telling Liam that you’re abusive by the way.” He wiggled his eyebrows at me.

“I am not!” I argued with a laugh.

He rolled his eyes and I snuggled back up to him, focusing on whatever was on the TV.

“What are we going to do for the rest of the day?” Louis asked.

“Like I know. I figured we would do whatever you came up with.” I shrugged, regretting it when the pain shot through me.

“Well I think, that we should laze around and eat as much ice cream as possible while watching our favorite movies and cuddling.” He looked down at me.

“That’s about all I can do right now.” I sighed.

“Come on, it’ll be fun! Just like the old days! Movie nights, remember?” He tried to lighten my mood.

“Yeah, I guess.” I mumbled.

“Hey.” He called, waiting until I looked at him to continue. “I’m insulted that you’re not excited to spend the whole day with me.” He sulked.

“I am, Lou. I just feel bad that you have to be stuck here all day with me like some kind of babysitter while I bitch and complain because everything I do hurts. I hate having to depend on someone. I feel like I’m inconveniencing you.” I crossed my arms carefully.

He gave me an odd and confused face. “What makes you think that? I am more than happy to be with you all day. I would be here right now whether or not you were hurt. What makes you think I feel stuck? I volunteered for this because I wanted to be the one to spend the most time with you. Not Liam, not Niall, not anyone.” He smiled and kissed my cheek.

I smiled back in response and laid my head against his chest again. “If you say so, Lou-bear.”

“Now, which movie first?”

~

“You’re out of ice cream!” Louis called from the kitchen.

I sighed and slumped further into the couch. I heard his phone go off and a second later I heard him answer it.

“Hello? ……She did what?! …..Why?! …..Well is she okay? ……Yeah, I guess that’s okay. I’ll head that way in a few.” He walked back into the living room looking stressed out.

“What’s wrong?” I furrowed my brow at him.

“Lottie got into a fight at school. She’s a bit messed up so I need to go get her because mum’s at work.” He ran his hand through his hair and sighed.

“Oh. Well that’s fine. I understand.” I told him with a smile. “Go on. Your sister needs you.” I urged.

“But you need me too. I don’t want to leave you.” He said.

“I’ll be fine, Louis. I was by myself all this morning when you were at school. Don’t worry about me. Just go.” I giggled.

“I’ll call Liam.” He said, already holding the phone to his ear.

“There’s really no nee-“

“I’m not going to leave you.” He cut me off with a stern look.

I put my hands up in the air dramatically and laughed lightly. “Whatever, bro.” I joked.

“Hey, Liam? I need you to come take care of Eilana while I tend to something. Can you do that? ….Yeah, right now…..Okay, thanks.” He hung up. “He’s on his way.” He mumbled.

I rolled my eyes and yawned boredly. “Okay. So you can go now.” I reminded him.

“But I don’t w-“

“Just go!” I laughed. “Your sister needs you more right now.”

He huffed and grabbed his jacket, kissing me on the cheek before telling me he would be back later.

I watched as the door shut behind him and sighed lazily as I closed my eyes for a second. Before I knew it, I heard a knock on the door, accompanied by a voice.

“El? It’s Liam.” I heard his muffled voice.

I smiled and stood up slowly, walking to the door. I opened it and gave him a smirk. “I can tell it’s you by your voice, Liam.”

“Oh, really?” He smiled. “How are you doing?” He asked.

“I don’t feel any better from yesterday.” I said, shutting the door behind him.

“Yeah, it’s going to take a few days before the soreness starts to ease up.” He informed me.

“Sorry that you had to come over here. I tried to tell Louis that I was fine by myself, but you know how he is.” I rolled my eyes.

“Oh no, It’s not a problem. I was just wondering about you before he called me, so I’m glad that I got a chance to see you.” He smiled. “I was going to come over earlier, but I decided I shouldn’t interrupt you two.”

“Why not? We were just lazing all day.” I told him.

“Well still, I just thought maybe you two would want to have some alone time together.” He shrugged.

I narrowed my eyes at him as I tried to hold back a blush. “Why do you say that?”

“…Because you two used to be around each other all the time, but now we’re in the picture and you two don’t seem to spend as much time together as you used to?” He raised his eyebrows at me like what he said was the most obvious thing.

I laughed nervously. “Oh, right. Yeah.” I responded quickly.

He gave me a weird look but brushed it off. “Do you mind if I...” He gestured to my stomach and I got what he was saying.

“Oh, yeah. Not at all.” I said shyly.

He lifted my shirt up slowly and looked over my stomach, his eyes becoming wider as my shirt got higher. I looked down at myself to see all of the yellow and purple bruises that covered my skin. It was a scary sight to see.

He got on his knees as his eyes scanned my bruised skin with shock. He looked up at me sadly. “This is horrible.” He said barely above a whisper. He reached out and brushed my skin with a feather light touch, sending chills up my spine. He looked up at me again after examining it closely. “Who could do something like this to you? Who would ever want to hurt you?” He whispered, sounding broken hearted.

“It’s okay, Liam. I’m fine. It’ll go away.” I told him.

He stood up. “But you’re not okay. Yes they’ll fade, but for right now, you’re not okay. You’re hurt. You’ve been hurt enough, Eilana.” His eyes were filled with sadness.

“Liam, don’t be upset.” I smiled softly.

“No. You’re hurt. Of course I’m going to be upset.” He pulled me into a hug carefully.

I hugged him back as tight as I could stand. “Liam, you worry about me too much.” I laughed.

“Well I don’t think so.” He mumbled.

I sat down on the couch again and he sat next to me, grabbing my hand and putting it on his lap.

“So what happened with Louis?” He asked.

“Lottie got into a fight. He had to go pick her up because he was the only one available. He said he would be back later.” I explained.

He nodded his head and turned his attention to the film on the TV. “Avengers, huh?”

“Yep. One of my favorites.” I said.

“I know.” He chuckled. “Didn’t you just watch this movie like two weeks ago?” He asked.

“Yes. And now I’m watching it again.”

He laughed lightly and shook his head with a smile. “How can you watch it again so soon?”

“Because who doesn’t want to stare at six hot guys for two and a half hours?”

“Me.” He said simply.

“But you like this movie!” I argued.

“Oh, I love it. But I don’t watch it because there’s hot guys in it.” He laughed.

I narrowed my eyes at him and smirked. “Now now, Liam, lying is bad.” I teased.

He dropped his jaw at me and smiled. “You’re a mean one, aren’t you?”

“Yes.” I wiggled my eyebrows.

“I am very much into girls, I’ll have you know.” He defended.

I giggled to myself. “Oh, I know. I know more than anyone.” I rolled my eyes at the memory. “So, you watch it for Black Widow then?”

“Actually, no. She’s not much my type.” He stuck out his bottom lip and shrugged.

I gave him a weird look. “Whatever, dude. You’re weird.” I giggled.

“What?! Look, I watch the movie because I like the movie.” He raised a brow at me.

I looked at him in silence for a while before smiling to myself. “You know, whenever you use your eyebrows to emote, it’s a lot more extreme than most people. Take caution when using those things.” I laughed.

“Hey!” He laughed.

“I’m kidding, Liam. We all love your eyebrows.” I patted him on the shoulder.

He pursed his lips and shook his head at me. “Just watch the movie and stop picking on me.” He chuckled.

~

I looked at the clock on the light green wall. 7:06pm.

I was about to ask Liam what we were doing about dinner before there was a knock on the door.

Liam looked at me strangely. “Were you expecting someone?”

“Nope. It’s probably just Louis.” I told him as he got up and walked towards the door. “Not sure why he wouldn’t just come in…”

I paid no attention to it until I heard Liam’s surprised tone. “Zayn?”

I focused my attention on the door. Sure enough, Zayn was standing there, looking very nervous as Liam’s eyes looked at him with question.

“What are you doing here?” He asked.

I caught Zayn’s eye as he failed to respond. “Uhh…” He stood frozen.

“Everything okay, mate?” Liam asked.

“Yeah, um, I just… wanted to come by and make sure she was doing alright.” He shook his head as if trying to clear his mind.

Liam gave him a weird look. “Right. Well that was nice of you. Come in.” He invited.

“I didn’t know you were here.” He cleared his throat.

“He’s just here to take care of me, Zayn. Louis was here earlier, but he had to take care of something.” I said.

He nodded and sat down on the couch diagonal me. “Cool. So, are you feeling any better?” He asked casually, trying not to seem suspicious to Liam.

“Right now, I still feel like shit. Liam said it’s going to take a few days before the pain starts to lessen.” I told him.

He nodded slowly and sat back into the couch more comfortably. “At least you don’t have to go to school for a few days.” He shrugged.

“Yeah, I guess that’s the silver lining here.”

Somehow Harry had gotten me a few days rest from school. I wasn’t going to question what he had to go through for that. It was probably more trouble than was necessary.

“How long have you been here?” He asked Liam.

“Since about five.” He said plainly.

“Oh. Well you can go now if you want. I’ll watch over her.” He tried to say as nonchalant as possible.

Liam gave him a weird look. “You’ll do what? Since when did you care so much about Eilana?” He asked, skeptical.

“Well I just don’t want you to have to be here forever and I don’t have anything better to do, so I thought I would do my share of the work since we all seem to be having a turn.” He shrugged, trying to make it seem like the most normal thing.

“Is that what you want, El?” He looked at me.

“Yeah, that’s fine.” I said with a small smile.

His face became more distorted at my answer. “…Are you sure?”

“Yeah.”

“With Zayn? You want Zayn to stay here with you? To cheer you up? You want Zayn?” He kept asking in disbelief.

“…Yes.” I giggled. “Louis will be back soon anyway.” I told him.

He looked back and forth at us a million times before shaking his head in confusion and sticking his hands up. “Alright. Whatever you say.”

He came to give me a hug and I whispered in his ear. “We’ve talked about this.” I reminded him of the conversation we had about who I liked a little while ago. He raised his eyebrows at me when he remembered but didn’t say anything about it.

He put on his jacket and headed for the door. “Just call me if you need me.” He gave me another strange face before leaving.

Zayn started to chuckled when the door finally shut.

“What?” I asked, starting to giggle myself.

“Nothing. It’s just funny how none of them have any clue.” He got up and moved to sit next to me.

“Well they’re going to find out eventually. Maybe not about this in particular, but that we’re closer than we let on.”

“Eh, let them.” He mumbled, coming closer to me and wrapping an arm carefully around me. “I’ve missed you all day.”

“Have you?” I smiled.

He nodded before connecting our lips softly. “Even though we don’t talk in school, I still like just having you there.” He said.

I smiled wider before kissing him again. “By the way, I never thanked you.”

“Thanked me for what?” He asked.

“For helping me. You stood up for me. Thank you.”

“Oh, that. It’s not a big deal. No need to thank me. I was only looking out for a friend.”

“Just a friend?” I questioned.

“Yes. A friend that I happen to like a lot more than my other friends.” He smiled.

I giggled and kissed his cheek. “Still, thank you, Zayn.”

“Usually the hero gets a kiss or something…” He trailed off with a smirk.

I rolled my eyes and grabbed his face before planting a very heated kiss on his lips. When I started to pull away he pulled me back for another one.

“I can’t get enough of you, Eilana Stockridge. You will be the downfall of me.”

“I don’t think so. There will be no down falling of any sorts.” I joked.

“But you’ve already changed me so much. You make me happy, even if only for a short time every day. You’ve given me enough of a taste to do anything for the rest. I would do anything for you.” He placed delicate kisses upon my neck.

I smiled and relaxed into him. “You praise me far too much.” I sighed.

~

I laid down on my bed as I munched on my piece of pizza. Zayn followed behind me and started to look around my room. I watched him lazily as he scanned over things slowly. He stopped at my jewelry box.

“What are you doing?” I asked after a few seconds.

“You kept them?” He turned around with a small smile, almost a smirk.

“Kept what?” I questioned, confused.

He held up the box of purple diamond earrings.

“So it was you!” I exclaimed, sitting up quickly.

“Yes.” He confirmed.

“Zayn you have to take those back! They’re much too expensive for someone like me to own!” I started.

“No way. You’re keeping them.”

“Well they’re lovely, but I cannot keep them.” I tried again.

“Please? Come on, I wanted to get you something I thought you deserved, so I got you something that was worth your beauty.”

I couldn’t help but smile at his sweet words. “But how did you know that I wanted them?”

“Well, when I decided that I wanted to get you the perfect gift, I went to Louis. I knew he would know what you wanted most.” He confessed.

“So Louis did know who it was!” I rolled my eyes and rubbed my forehead at the thought that Louis had known this whole time.

“Just please keep them. For me. I want you to have something from me. And wear them please?” He pleaded as he sat next to me.

I sighed and smiled at him. “Alright, fine.”

He smiled and cupped my face before kissing me sweetly. It quickly turned into a make out session, just not with a lot of physical contact due to my bruised state. Regardless, it was still very heated.

So heated that we were too distracted to hear my bedroom door open.

Chapter Text

The sound of someone softly clearing their throat interrupted out little session. I whipped my head around to see Louis standing in the doorframe looking rather awkward.

I jumped up from the bed, cringing when the pain shot through me. "Louis." I didn't know what else to say.

He looked at us with a raised brow. "Uh, sorry. Didn't mean to interrupt." He dropped his gaze to the floor.

Zayn stood up. "I think I'll just be leaving." He told me quietly before hugging me shortly and giving me a smile. "See you around, mate." He patted Louis on the back as he passed.

I heard the door shut and I looked up at Louis, my face pink. "Um..."

"I thought you liked Harry?" He asked suddenly.

"Well, I do. But, I like Zayn too." I looked down.

He didn’t say anything and looked away. "Where's Liam?"

"Uh, he left because Zayn came over."

"Why did Zayn come over?"

"Because he wanted to see how I was doing." I said quietly.

"Well apparently he thinks you’re doing well enough." He mumbled.

"Louis! He didn’t come over just for that…” I blushed.

He sighed and walked past me to sit on my bed. “Well how are you doing, love?”

“I’m the same as earlier today.” I told him, sitting down next to him.

He laid down and I laid down right after. It was silent as both of us stared at the ceiling. I could feel the slight tension between us. I wasn’t sure exactly what kind of tension it was though. I just knew I didn’t like it.

“Louis, you don’t think I’m a slut do you?” I finally asked, not being able to bear it anymore. It was the only thought running through my head.

He turned his head to look at me with a furrowed brow and a frown. “Of course not. I know you better than that, Eilana. You’re just confused, and people are shoving their feelings at you. Of course there are going to be some kisses along the way. You’re a teenager, why not? It’s not like it’s half as bad as what most girls your age are up to.” He shrugged, putting his hands behind his head.

I sighed lightly and closed my eyes. “Yeah, I guess you’re right.” It was only now that I remembered why he left earlier. “Hey, how’s Lottie doing?”

“She’s alright. It turns out that it wasn’t anything more than a catfight. Just hair pulling and slapping. Nothing to leave her marked or bruised. She just got a detention.” He told me.

“Oh. That’s good. Why was she fighting someone in the first place?” I asked curiously.

“Not exactly clear on that. She said something about a boy named Martin. She didn’t want to talk about it.”

I remained silent in response, and we laid there for some time, both of us just thinking about things. After a while, I had made up my mind.

“I’m going to school tomorrow.” I said blankly.

He looked at me with surprise. “What? Why? I think it’s best if you just stay home and rest for a while.” He said.

“Because I want to go back. I hate sitting here all day. Besides, it’s just a couple of bruises. You’re all babying me so much over nothing. I think if I try to sit here by myself while you’re all at school for another day, I’m going to explode.”

He stared at me for a moment before sighing. “Well I’m not going to stop you. Do what you want I guess.”

I rolled over with my back to him and turned off the lamp, leaving us in almost blackness except for the light of the full moon glaring through my window. I felt Louis snuggle up to the back of me and wrap his arm around me, searching for my hand and tangling his fingers with mine. I sighed contently at the warmth he brought me as he brushed the hair from my neck.

“I think I’ll stay the night here.” He mumbled into my shoulder.

I smiled to myself in the darkness. “That’s fine. But why?” I had to ask.

“Because I miss it.”

The smile on my face grew wider at his quiet words. Honestly, I missed it too.

~

As I walked the halls the next day, I saw the very same group of girls that had done this to me. I tried not to stare at them in fear that they would do it again, but when they saw me, they fled from me quickly. I gave a confused face and shrugged, continuing down the halls. I ran into Liam not long after that and we greeted each other with a hug.

“So, I just had a run in with those girls, but they avoided me like the plague. Any idea why?” I asked.

He chuckled. “Don’t worry about it.” He tried to brush it off.

“Liam.” I looked at him with a serious face.

“Alright, alright. Yes, it has to do with us. Zayn, Harry, Niall, Louis, and I all had a talk with them. Don’t worry, we didn’t hurt them, only scared them out of their wits. They won’t mess with you anymore.” He slung an arm around my shoulder as we walked.

“I can’t believe you guys really do stuff like that. It’s like you’re some sort of gang or something.” I rolled my eyes at the thought.

“Well we are. Sort of. Just here in school. But Zayn seems to be the one to take to it more naturally. He takes things like that more lightly than the rest of us. He’s the only one who never shows any kind of regret for something like that. I love him, but that kid scares me sometimes.”

I tensed up at the fact that he was so close to Zayn’s secret. I laughed nervously and tried to ignore it, hoping the subject would change.

“So how come you came back to school so soon?” He asked.

“Because I’m tired of sitting in the house alone for the first hours of the day that you’re all here.” I told him.

He nodded slowly. “But it’s only been one day.” He pointed out.

“So? It’s one day too long.” I shrugged.

“Hey!” Niall greeted me cheerily as he approached us.

“Hey, Ni!” I greeted back and hugged him before opening my locker.

“Are you sure being back so early isn’t bad for you?” He asked, watching me shuffle around in my stuff.

“I’m sure. Just a little soreness. It’s not like my limbs are rotting off or something. If I can sit on a couch all day, I can sit at a desk all day.” I argued.

He thought for a moment before nodding his head. “She makes a good point.” He said to Liam.

“By the way, Ni, what’s this I hear about you threatening girls?” I teased.

“What are you talking about? Have you gone mad?” He laughed nervously, failing miserably at hiding it.

“Niall, I told her. She knows. The gig is up.” Liam said plainly.

He looked at him and back to me to see me smirking at him. “Uh, look, it was only to protect you. And it’s not like I would actually hur-“

“Niall, I’m just teasing you. I know you wouldn’t hurt any girls. Chill.” I smiled and rolled my eyes. “Now if you’ll excuse us, Liam, me and this bozo have a class to attend.” I grabbed Niall’s arm and waved goodbye to Liam.

Niall and I took our seats just in time. Class hadn’t been going on for more than five minutes before a paper airplane landed on my desk. I looked at Niall to see him smiling at me. He pointed at the piece of paper. I smiled and unfolded it to see his perfect handwriting.

This class already sucks. I can’t wait until the weekend. Me and you are going to do something fun. Not sure what, but we’ll figure something out. Maybe we’ll go white water rafting, or maybe skydiving. How about a trip to the moon? Nah, not exciting enough. We’ll think of something.

Ps. You look absolutely beautiful today. ;)

I smiled as I read through it. I blushed at the last part and looked up at him. He smiled back and winked at me, turning his hat around. I pulled out my phone and texted him.

You’re making me blush. Stop. I look hideous today and you know it. -_- And as far as the ideas thing is going, the moon is a little out there isn’t it? Lol. ;) xx

He pulled out his vibrating phone and read it with a smile before replying.

Lucky Charms

No, you look lovely. And yes, the moon is a little out there. It’s all the way in space as a matter of fact. ;P xx

I rolled my eyes and typed back.

Oh hah hah. Very funny. You think you’re clever or something? I meant out there as in the idea of going there is a bit extreme. xx

He gave me a smirk from across the room after he read it, shaking his head.

Lucky Charms

I knew what you meant, darlin’. Only teasing you. You make it so easy. ;) xx

I rolled my eyes again and smiled, slumping into my chair.

~

“So tell me, why exactly you’re back so early?” Harry asked from across the table.

“Because I didn’t want to sit at home anymore. How many times do I have to explain this to people? I appreciate you doing… whatever you did to get me time off, but I really don’t need it after all. I’m fine, really.” I said as I picked over my vegetables.

He looked at me strangely. “Okay. If you say so.” He shrugged.

“Same thing she told me.” Liam said.

“I think I left my phone in my locker by accident. I’m going to go get it before the next period starts. See you guys later.” I waved to them as I stood up with my tray and walked out after dumping my trash.

I made it to my locker and sure enough, I had set it down in there earlier while I was chatting with the guys before lunch. I sighed at my stupidity and put it back in my book bag before shutting the door. I looked down at the floor and turned around to see a pair of shoes in front of me. I squealed and looked up quickly to see two mischievous sparkling green eyes looking back at me.

I clutched the skin over my heart and sighed heavily. “For fuck sake Harry, you almost scared me to death.”

He smiled at me funnily, clearly amused by my frightened state. “Sorry, love.” He pulled me close to him and leaned down to give me a kiss.

“Harry, what if someone sees?”

“So? I’m Harry Styles, I can kiss who I want. No one’s going to question it. I kiss girls all the time. Or well, I used to.” He leaned in for another kiss, this time getting a response from me.

Slowly but surely I gave in, kissing him back in the middle of the empty school hallway. He smiled against my lips once he realized I had given in to him. He really liked winning. He backed me into my locker and put his hands under my thighs, lifting me up. I wrapped my legs around him and grabbed his face, kissing him hungrily. It had been a while since I had one of Harry’s kisses, and I missed them. I ran my fingers through his hair and he groaned lowly as I softly bit his bottom lip. His eyes opened and looked at me with intensity and mine stared back with lust.

“I wish we weren’t stuck here right now.” He growled in my ear, nipping at the hot skin of my neck. “Let’s go back to my house.” He mumbled.

“We can’t Harry. We’re at school, remember?” I giggled.

“It doesn’t matter.” He said.

“You mean skip? We can’t do that.” I warned.

“Of course we can. You’re not even supposed to be here today anyway. Come on, please?” He pleaded.

“No, Harry.”

He sighed and put me down. “Fine. Just come over tonight.” He grumbled.

I giggled and rolled my eyes. “Okay, I will. I have to get to class, so I’ll see you after school?”

“Yeah, yeah. Just don’t make me wait too long.” He waved as he headed off.

I really need to talk to Liam…

~

“Liam!” I ran up to him in the parking lot. He turned around and looked at me expectantly as I caught up to him. “Do you mind if I catch a ride with you? I need to talk to you.” I asked, out of breath.

“Of course. Hop in, love.” He unlocked his car and opened the door for me.

I got in and he sped towards his house. Once there, we headed straight for his room and he closed the door.

“So what is it this time? Let me guess, boy trouble?” He smirked knowingly and sat down next to me on his couch.

I rolled my eyes. “Yeah.” I pulled my legs up into me and hugged them.

“Well what’s the problem?” He put his arm around me.

“The other night when Zayn came over, we were in my room, and we were kissing when Louis came back unannounced and saw us.” I cringed at the thought all over again.

“Yeah? What about it?”

“Well now he knows of me and Zayn. And besides that, it’s just awkward.” I told him.

He chuckled lightly. “Right. Well what was his reaction? What happened?” He asked.

“Zayn just left after that, and Louis seemed pretty alright with it. He made a remark about it, but that was it. There was definite tension in the room afterwards though.” I put my chin on my knees, pouting.

“Then it doesn’t seem like a big deal. Just relax. Let it go. If he’s not making a deal out of it, then there’s no reason for you to. I think you’re stressing yourself out about the little things, love.”

“If you think so.” I sighed.

“Let me ask you this, why is it so awkward between you and Louis when it comes to you liking other guys?”

“Well, you know about that little thing Louis and I had, right?”

“Yeah, but it’s over. So what’s the big deal?”

“It is, but-I don’t know. It just is.” I had no idea why either. I’d never really thought about it before. That’s just how it was.

He nodded his head and I leaned mine against his shoulder and folded my legs behind me. “Liam?”

“Yes, love?” He played with a strand of my hair.

“Why can’t I just pick a boy? Why do you all have to be so wonderful and charming?”

He chuckled. “I think you’re asking the wrong person.” He looked away.

I knitted my eyebrows together in confusion. “Hey, what are you saying? That includes you! You’re every bit just as charming and wonderful as the rest of the boys. You’re just not pushy and invasive. Thanks for that.” I smiled up at him.

He smiled back warmly at me. “I don’t believe you for a second, but thank you.”

“I mean it, Liam!” I stressed.

He chuckled again. “Yeah, alright. I’m nothing special though. Don’t know what you’re thanking me for.”

“For everything! And yes you are! I’m thanking you for all the things you’ve done for me since the beginning of our friendship. Remember all the times that you’ve saved me, or stuck up for me? What about all the times that you’ve helped me? You’re always there for me, Liam. Whether it’s a serious problem, or just needing someone to talk to, you’re the first person I go to. You don’t judge me, you don’t scold me, you don’t say I told you so. You just stand by and open your arms for me when I need you. Thank you is hardly enough to show my appreciation.” I hugged him.

He smiled brightly and hugged me back. “You’re more than welcome, El. Now, what are you going to do about this boy problem?” He asked.

“I have no idea.” I sighed.

“Still haven’t picked one?”

“Nope. Whenever I think I’m finally starting to lean towards one of them in particular, another one pulls me in.” I turned my back to him and leaned onto his chest.

He put his arms around me and rested his chin on my head. “So, I know this might be a little more personal than you’d like to answer, but, how do you feel about Louis?” He asked.

I was silent for a few seconds. I wasn’t entirely sure myself. “I don’t know. I haven’t really thought about it in a while. I was just so happy to have him back in my life that I didn’t think further than that. I mean, sometimes when we have moments I feel like I do still like him that way, but I can’t be sure because I like all these other guys and then Louis doesn’t seem to show me any romantic affection like he used to, so I assume he doesn’t see me that way anymore. And even if he did somehow, I’m afraid to risk our friendship again.” I said, tracing circles on his forearm.

“I see. And who out of the three do you feel most close to right now?”

I thought about it before answering him. “I think Niall. But it’s hard to tell. I mean, Zayn and I have been talking a lot lately, and I feel like he really opens up to me. And then there’s Harry, who just does things to me. I don’t know, it’s like his words and his touches are some sort of poison that cloud my mind. But then there’s Niall. Sweet, sweet Niall. He’s always been so good to me, no matter what. And lately I’ve felt so lovey towards him. Not sure what it is, but I want to be near him suddenly. But maybe it’s just the fact that we used to be so close and now I’m missing it and not him.”

Liam remained silent for a while, leaving me to run through my thoughts alone. I felt like I was running in circles with all of this.

“I don’t know what to tell you except that the best way to decide would be to listen to your heart. I know that sounds unbelievably cheesy, but trust me, it’s over said for a reason. It’s true. A little help from your head wouldn’t hurt, but mostly listening to what your heart wants is the best way to solve most any problem.” He stroked my hair softly as he thought. “I wish I could help you more, but sadly that’s all I know to say. In the end, it’s your decision.”

I nodded and closed my eyes. “Thank you Liam. I can always count on you.” I said softly.

He chuckled lightly, but somehow it sounded sad. Bringing my thoughts to what could be wrong with him. The thought of him being unhappy saddened me.

“And how are you doing, Liam?”

“I’m doing just fine, thanks.” He said plainly.

“Don’t lie to me, Liam. What’s wrong?” I sat up and turned around to face him.

He looked at me with an expressionless face. “I’m not lying. I’m just tired is all.” He shrugged, looking away.

I sighed, knowing he was still lying, but I let it go. “Well, thanks for the help, but I need to get going.” I told him, standing up.

“Where are you going?” He asked.

“Um, to Harry’s. I told him I would come over.” I blushed.

“Oh. Well would you like a ride?” He offered.

“Actually, that would be nice. Thanks.”

He stood up and grabbed his jacket from the bed, and fished out his keys from his pocket. “Let’s go then. Don’t want to keep your precious Harry waiting.” He winked at me teasingly.

I rolled my eyes and blushed even more. “Oh please, Liam. We’re just hanging out.” I told him.

He laughed sarcastically. “Yeah, right. It’s not my business anyway.” He opened the door for me.

“You’re right, it’s not.” I laughed.

~

“Stay innocent.” He said as I unbuckled my seatbelt.

“Liam!” I looked at him quickly in shock.

“What?” He laughed, but there was something in his eyes.

I stopped my movement for a second to stare at him. “Are you sure you’re okay?” I asked him.

He smiled warmly at me, although not convincing. “Of course. I’m just fine. I’ll see you later, alright?”

I sighed. “Later.” I hugged his neck and kissed his cheek before getting out. “Thanks for the ride.” I said, hand on the car door.

“Anytime.” He smiled.

I smiled back before shutting the door and walking up to the house. I went to knock on the door before it opened right before me. My eyes widened in shock as William appeared before me.

“Ah, Miss Stockridge. Master Harry has been waiting for you.” He smiled before leading me into the house and taking my things. “He’s in his bedroom. He gave me orders to send you up as soon as you arrived.” He motioned towards the stairs with a smile.

I looked up to the top of the grand staircase before looking back at him. “Thank you, sir.” I said before climbing the stairs and finding Harry’s room among all the dozens of others up here.

I knocked on the closed door and waited for a few seconds before it opened quickly and Harry pulled me in before shutting the door again and pushing me into the wall beside it and attacking me with his kisses.

“A little impatient are we?” I joked.

“You’re late.” He growled against my neck.

I furrowed my brow. “What do you mean I’m late? You didn’t even give me a time.”

“But you took too long.” He said, biting at the sensitive skin.

“Well sorry…”

“I don’t like waiting, Eilana. I want you now. I wanted you five hours ago. I’ve waited long enough. I need you.” He whispered lowly in my ear, sending chills up my spine.

“Harry, I’m sorry. I had something to tend to-“

“More important than me? Aren’t I important to you? You don’t want me?” He looked at me with hurt in his bright green eyes.

“No, Harry, you are important and I do want you, I just took care of that first so I wouldn’t have to worry about it while I was over here.” I explained.

His face softened and his eyes darted down to my lips. “Oh, well I forgive you.” He kissed me sweetly. “We don’t want any interruptions do we?” He kissed me again. “I’m sorry, baby. It’s just that I don’t like waiting and I get cranky when I don’t get what I want. But I should be lucky to have you here with me at all. So I cherish it.” He smiled, kissing my lips again.

His kiss quickly became hungry and his hands started their roaming. I ran my hands through his curls and his found their way to my hips, gripping them firmly. I took in a sharp breath at the pain. He let go immediately.

“Sorry, love. I forgot you were all bruised.” He apologized, kissing my cheek softly.

“It’s okay, Harry.” I smiled weakly, kissing him this time.

He kissed back and picked me up carefully, carrying me to the bed. He set me down and climbed over me, careful not to put any pressure on me, he leaned down and kissed me teasingly. Chuckling at me when I whimpered at how his lips lingered just over my own, never kissing me for more than a second. I groaned and pulled him down to me, feeling satisfied when our lips finally connected. I closed my eyes as his lips found my neck. He was working on a love bite when my phone started to ring. I snapped my eyes open and he looked at me with a raised brow.

“Sorry, I’ll just take this for a second.” I said, reaching for my phone.

He beat me to it, shoving his hand in my pocket and pulling out my phone, he silenced it and threw it to the floor beside the bed.

“Harry!” I said, reaching for it.

He pushed me back down on the bed and resumed his previous position. “No interruptions this time.” He told me, clearly irritated.

“But what if it’s important?”

“It’s not.” He said, kissing my lips this time. “Just relax baby. Forget about it.”

I sighed and let him go on with his affection. I tried to forget about it, but I couldn’t push it to the back of my mind for some reason. Suddenly it started to ring again. I looked over at it but I couldn’t read the screen. Harry grabbed my face and forced my attention back at him.

“Just ignore it.” He said calmly, biting at my shoulder.

“But Harry, I can’t stop thinking about it.” I told him.

“Dammit, Eilana.” He rolled his eyes. “Look it’s not important. Forget it.” He said, looking at me intensely.

“But I have a feeling that it is. I would just ignore it any other time but I feel lik-“

“You’re with me right now! I’m the important one! Please, Eilana! I’m begging you! Just pay attention to me for one second! I need you and you’re leaving me hanging here! I’ve waited for you all day, why can’t you just relax for a minute?! You’re always running a hundred miles a minute, can you please just calm yourself for one second! For me!” He raised his voice. He was irritated and that was clear, but he was starting to scare me.

I looked up at him with frightened eyes. “Harry, you’re scaring me.” I said quietly.

He sighed heavily and sat up, rubbing his forehead. “Look, I’m sorry. But you have to understand how frustrating this is for me. You hardly ever give me the attention that you give everyone else, and now I’m having to fight for it even more against two other guys who hold your interest and it’s aggravating that I’m not the only one on your mind. I need you so much and I need your attention but you just push me aside. I’m tired of it, but I keep doing it because you’re worth it to me and you’re the only thing that keeps me going. What do I have to do to get to you?” He poured out, looking tired and defeated.

I looked at him with a sad face. I didn’t realize he felt that way. “I’m sorry, Harry. I didn’t know. I wish you would just tell me these things. But honestly, I give you just as much attention as I give everyone else, if not more. It’s all in your head. There’s nothing for you to do, Harry. What more do you want?”

“I want you, Eilana. You.”

“Well I’m sorry, but I can’t give you that just yet. I’m confused and I’m sorry that I can’t figure out my life, but if you haven’t noticed already, I’m not too great at that.” I told him.

He sighed and we stared at each other in silence for a while before my phone started ringing again. I looked at it and back to Harry. He looked away and got off of me, walking towards the other side of his room.

“Just get it. I don’t even care anymore.” He said.

I got up and walked over to the lit screen laying on the floor. I picked it up and saw that it was Niall. Something was telling me this wasn’t going to be just another chat. I hit the button and put it up to my ear, looking over at Harry who was now staring out his window, looking rather upset.

“Niall? What’s up?”

…El? Hey. Uh, sorry to bother you, but I just really needed to talk to you.

“It’s okay, Ni. You’re not bothering me. What do you need, sweetie?”

I looked to Harry to see him sneering at my words. He smiled bitterly as he watched the gardeners water the plants outside.

Um, I-Can I come over?

“To my house? Uh, yeah. I’m headed there now, okay?”

He sounded very upset, almost like he was on the verge of tears. I could tell he really needed me.

Thank you, El.

That’s all he said before hanging up. I put my phone back in my pocket.

“So you’re leaving now?” Harry asked coldly.

“Well I wasn’t planning on it, but that was Niall and he sounds like he really needs my help. Something’s not right.” I told him.

He laughed bitterly. “Right. Like what? He’s gone too long without seeing you? Yeah, we wouldn’t want to make Niall wait, would we?” He spat at me.

I rolled my eyes and walked over to him. “No, Harry. It’s more urgent than that. I’ll see you later, okay?” I got on my tip toes and kissed his cheek before hugging him, he didn’t hug me back. He didn’t even look at me.

“Harry, are you really going to be like this?” I sighed I annoyance.

“How do you want me to act? Of course I’m not happy! But it’s not like you give a single fuck.”

“Harry.” I tried again, tired of his short temper. He didn’t respond so I just threw my arms up and let them drop. “Alright, fine. I’ll see you later.” I said.

“Yeah.” He grumbled, not even bothering to look back at me as I left.

I hurried downstairs to see William waiting there. He gave me my stuff and I thanked him sweetly before leaving. I made my way back home, almost jogging the whole way.

~

I saw Niall’s car sitting in my driveway. He was leaned up against it with his head in his hand. He looked deep in thought and not too happy.

“Niall? You okay?” I called out as I made my way up to him.

He looked up to see me and smiled half-heartedly at the sight. “Hey, El. Thanks for being here.” He hugged me.

“Let’s go inside.” I said, leading his slouched figure into the house.

“I hope you weren’t doing anything too important when I called you. It’s just, I wanted you and no one else. You’re the only one that can help me right now.” He told me sadly.

It was heart breaking to see him like this. “It’s okay, Ni. No I wasn’t doing anything important.” I said, thinking back to Harry’s sour attitude. “Now what’s wrong?” I sat next to him on the bed, taking him in my arms. He was limp like a child, almost lifeless.

“When I got home from school today, my mum called me into the kitchen to talk to me. I had no idea what she was going to tell me, but I wouldn’t have guessed it was so horrible.” He said, his voice cracking.

I furrowed my brow in sadness. “And what did she tell you, Niall?” I asked, a little afraid to hear it myself.

“She-She has cancer, El. It’s already stage three.” He teared up.

I gasped at the news. This was horrible. “Niall, I’m so sorry.” I said, rubbing his back.

He buried his face into my shoulder and started to cry silently. “I’m so scared, El. I don’t want to lose her. I love her too much. What will I do if I lose her?”

“It’s going to be okay, Ni. She’ll get treatment and she’ll be okay. It’s going to be okay. Your mom is a strong woman. Don’t worry. It’s going to be okay.” I shushed him softly.

“But what if it’s not? What then? It’s my mum, El. She’s supposed to be around for a long time. She’s supposed to be at my graduation, at my wedding, and she’s supposed to be the grandmother to my children. What am I going to do if she leaves me early?” He said weakly, playing with my hair.

I didn’t know what to say, so I just continued to rub his back soothingly, like he always did to me. I cradled him softly and rocked him back and forth. I had never seen him so vulnerable before. He was always the strong one, but not this time. This time I was the one doing the comforting. And now I realized how painful it was to be on the other side of it.

Neither of us spoke for the next hour, we just snuggled up to the other and I gave comforting touches as he looked blankly into the distance with his fear filled, watery eyes. I had also teared up in all of it. It was very sad news. Even for me. I loved Niall’s mom. She’s so sweet and such a good mom. I know how close Niall is to her and it only makes it all the sadder.

“I’m here, Ni. We’ll get through this. I promise.”

Chapter Text

"Niall!" I squealed as he spun me around.

He chuckled and put me down, throwing an arm around my shoulder. "You're so easy to scare."

I rolled my eyes and blew at the hair that hung into my face. "Well how am I supposed to react when I'm walking along the street and someone picks me up and starts slinging me around?" I giggled.

"But you knew it was me." He raised his eyebrow.

"Yes, but only after I heard your laugh." I clarified.

He shrugged and kept walking towards the cafe we were to meet at. He opened the door for me and I walked in, letting the scent of freshly brewed coffee hit me.

It’s been a week since that night with Niall. He seemed to be taking it well, but I knew him better than that. I was sad I couldn’t do more for him. All I can do is be there for him, and I promised him I would be. His mom was handling it well though. She was in good spirits about it, just like I assumed she would be. She was always so positive, even when things were bad. But I knew she was doing it for Niall more than anything. She hated to see him so scared and sad, and you could tell by the way she looked at him.

Right now, he was just trying to take it easy and keep his mind off of it. It’s what his mother wanted him to do, and as a good son, that’s what he was doing. He didn’t want her worrying over anything else. So I was spending time with him lately to take his mind off of things.

“So how’s your chem homework coming?” He asked as he sipped his drink.

I scoffed. “Like shit. I’ve barely started. Probably going to wind up being one of those last minute things. What about you?”

“Same here.” He laughed.

I smiled and replied to the text that Louis had just sent me.

“I’m glad that we’re getting to spend some time together. I really missed it, just me and you. I knew I could count on you to be there for me, El.” He smiled sweetly.

“Of course. You were always there for me, so I’m always here for you.” I smiled back.

Suddenly a very loud group of guys walked in, causing a scene. “Niaaalll!” One of them said loudly, making his way over to our table. I recognized him from school. Total asshole.

Niall smiled as genuinely as he could and shook his hand. “Adam! What’s up?” He stood up, greeting the rest of the group as they made their way over. “What’s up, lads? What are you all up to?”

They chatted for a while before any one of them even noticed my existence.

“And who is this bird you’ve got with you?” He asked, looking me over like I was a new car or something.

Niall noticed and immediately got tense. “This is my best friend, Eilana. Eilana, this is Adam.” He said, not too happy about it.

“Very nice to meet you, Eilana. Have we met before? You seem familiar.” He asked with a thoughtful face.

“We go to school together.” I raised my brow.

“Do we? Well what a shame that we’ve never met before. Surely someone of your beauty would have caught my eye.” He smirked, but it was more annoying than anything else. I suppose he thought he was being charming.

“Right.” I looked away, not amused or interested.

“Niall, buddy, you have to help a friend out.” He whispered to him. “What’s say you slip me her number?” He tried.

I had to hold back the laughter as I saw the fire in Niall’s eyes grow. “I don’t think so. Eilana is off limits. To everyone. So don’t even think twice about looking at her as a target.” He warned.

“Come on now, you can’t just keep all of that to yourself now can you? You need to learn to share.” He joked.

“No. She is not to share, she is not an object, nor is she mine any more. She is just off limits, and that’s all that you need to know to keep your, and all your buddies hands far away from her. Heed my warning.” Niall narrowed his eyes at him.

The guy scoffed and smirked at Niall. “Well, I believe that’s her decision.” He crossed his arms.

I watched as Niall gritted his teeth. It never took long for anyone to notice that he didn’t take to the idea of other men liking me very well.

“It is. But I know for a fact that she would never go for a guy like you anyway. I’m only saving you from the embarrassment of rejection.” He smirked.

“Yeah, right. How do you know she isn’t all about me?” He asked cockily.

I laughed silently to myself at the thought. He was attractive. Well, maybe to most girls. Not to me. He was a jock type and a total air head. Not to mention a jerk.

“Because trust me, I know what she likes, and you’re certainly not it.” He laughed. “Now, if we have any further disagreements, I would be more than happy to beat some sense into you.”

“What the hell, mate? You used to be cool about this kind of stuff. What happened? I thought we were cool?”

“No, no. We are merely acquaintances, and only through the fact that we’re both popular. I really have no friendship with you, nor do I want one. Especially not if you’re going to stare at my girl like she’s a possession.”

“What the hell, Horan?” He put his hands up. “Forget it.” He and his friends left in a huff.

I watched Niall as he sat down in his chair across from me. He looked to me slowly. “Sorry about that.”

“Your girl, huh?” I smirked.

He stared at me in realization of what he had said. “Sorry, it kind of slipped out.” He sighed.

“It’s okay, Ni. And thanks for that. You were right about me not liking someone like him.” I laughed.

He smiled. “I know I was. I know what you like.” He wiggled his eyebrows.

“Uh huh. And what do I like?” I asked with a smile.

“You like stuff like this.” He put his arm up and flexed, giving me an exaggerated sexy face. “And this.” He drew a circle around his face and then laughed.

I giggled at his cuteness. “Yes, I do.” I smiled warmly at him.

~

That night as I was studying, my phone buzzing caught my attention. I got up and grabbed it from my vanity.

Zayn

Can I come in? It’s cold out here. ;)

I smiled at the words on the screen and set my phone down, walking to the door. I opened it up to see Zayn leaned against the door frame. His lips curved into a smile when he saw me.

“Hello, gorgeous.” He purred as he stepped into my house.

“Hey, Zayn.” I smiled as he hugged me and nuzzled his nose into my neck.

“You weren’t doing anything important were you?” He asked.

“Well I was studying, so y-“

“Good.” He cut me off, picking me up.

“What are you doing?” I asked as he carried me through the house.

He answered me with a longing kiss. When I opened my eyes we were already in my bedroom. Zayn walked to the bed and with an outstretched arm, wiped the bed clean of all of my books and other things.

“Zayn! You’re making a mess.” I giggled.

He smirked at me and put me on the bed. “Don’t worry, I can make you forget about that.” He winked.

I blushed as he held himself over me. He leaned down and kissed me again as he took off his jacket quickly. He threw it to the side and grabbed my hands, holding them to the sides of my head. “I missed you.” He mumbled against my lips. He gave me a few short kisses before drawing back to look at with confusion. “What?” He asked when he realized I wasn’t responding.

I sighed lightly and looked at him sadly. “Zayn what’s wrong?”

He looked at me strangely. “What do you mean?” He tried to kiss me again but I turned my head.

“Zayn, you know what I’m talking about. Now why did you come over here?”

He sighed and sat up. “Nothing in particular. Look, I just wanted to see you. Is there a problem with that? Can I not just come over because I want to?”

“Well of course you can. But I just assumed something was wrong because you always come over when something is troubling you.” I played with his necklace as he looked down at me.

“I know. I’m sorry I burden you with my problems. You’re the only one I can come to though. You’re my only outlet from life. When I come here, I don’t have to worry about those things for a little while.” He looked at me sadly, then looked away.

I smiled up at him. “Hey, look at me.”

He slowly turned back to me with a tired expression.

“It’s okay, Zayn. That’s what I’m here for. I want to help you.” I assured him. “Now, whatever I need to do to cheer you up, let me know.” I told him.

He gave me a crooked smile and stared down at me. “You’re amazing, you know that?”

I giggled and pulled him down by his necklace. “So I’ve heard.” I kissed his soft lips sweetly. “I’m always here for you.”

He looked at me with desperate eyes. “Good. Because I need you, Eilana.”

I stared back at him, lost in his serious words. I didn’t know what to say.

He needs me.

He smiled softly and laid another kiss on my lips. “Thank you. You have no idea how much I appreciate you.”

I smiled back and looked down to the tattoo on his arm, tracing it with my fingers. “I’m just trying to help.” I said quietly.

He laid down next to me and pulled me close to him. “Can I ask you a question?” He mumbled into the back of my neck.

“Of course. What is it?” I asked before yawning.

“Where do I stand among the rest of the guys? Do I even compare to them?”

I scrunched up my face at his confusing words. “What do you mean?”

“I mean, like, do you consider me to be just as good as the other guys, or am I just a no good?”

I turned my head to look back at him. “Zayn, what would make you think you’re a no good? What, just because your father made a bad decision it automatically makes you a worthless person? I do have to wonder how your brain works sometimes.” I shook my head and sighed. “Of course you’re just as good. You just had a rough patch in your life. You got over it, and now there’s nothing wrong with you. You’re a good guy, Zayn. I don’t know why you can’t see it.”

He was silent for a moment. “So, you’re saying that Harry or Louis aren’t any better than me?” He asked.

“Exactly. You’re all good guys, you all have your little personality traits that aren’t the best, but don’t we all. You’ve all had a few mishaps along the way, but you’re all perfectly nice, good guys, no matter how you want to present yourself.” I told him.

He sighed contently and kissed my cheek before laying his head to rest on my shoulder. “Thank you for not judging me. I seem to have a big problem with that. People often judge me before they know me, and so I guess after a while, I just became the person that they all expected me to be. And it wasn’t me. It wasn’t me.” He shook his head and stared blankly at the wall.

“Well I’m so happy that you’re yourself now. I like the real you.” I smiled.

He let the silence fall between us as we lay there, running over our thoughts. I lost track of time when my phone started to vibrate on my nightstand. I looked over at it lazily and picked it up.

Curly

I’ve been thinking, and I’m sorry. I know I was being a complete dick to you that day, and I’m sorry, okay? But you have to admit that I was right. At least about some of it.

I scoffed and rolled my eyes. I can’t believe Harry. He still thinks he’s right.

After that little quarrel we had, we’ve been more distant in the past week. Of course, after hearing about Niall’s mom, he felt bad about accusing me of leaving for no reason. He apologized about that at least. He was still around just as much because he wanted to be there for Niall, we all did, but he just didn’t talk to me as much. And as far as our little fling went, it was nonexistent right now. It was clear that we weren’t on the best of terms. Everyone noticed, but they didn’t ask about it.

If he thinks he’s going to fix this by saying that he’s sorry but he’s still right, then he’s got to be crazy. What kind of argument is that, Harry? This is unbelievable.

Harry, you can’t be serious? I don’t know what is going on in that pretty little head of yours, but it is wrong. You wanted me to spend more time with you, but now all you’ve done is push me away and you hardly see me half as much now. I really don’t understand you sometimes. I don’t want this to continue but if you keep insisting that you were right, how am I supposed to let this go? If you don’t stop being a spoiled brat, then we’re going to keep going in circles.

“Who are you texting?” Zayn asked.

“Harry. He’s being a bit of a moron.”

“Yeah, he does that occasionally. What’s going on between you two, anyway? Did you have a couples fight?” He joked.

“We’re not a couple. But yes, I guess you could say that. I’d really rather not talk about it.” I brushed the subject off.

“That’s fine. I understand.” He said, rolling onto his back.

I looked back to my phone as it lit up again.

Curly

Excuse me? Spoiled brat? I’m not the one who’s running around with different people because I want more than one to myself. Having your cake and eating it too, eh? You want me to sit around and wait for you while you run around and do what you want? How would you feel if I was hanging around other girls when you weren’t around? So don’t tell me that I’m being a spoiled brat, Eilana.

I was appalled by what he said. I can’t even believe I’m doing this myself, but it is not for the reasons he thinks. It hurts to know that he thinks I’m playing all of them simply because I don’t want to have to commit to just one. If only he had any idea how hard this is for me. I’m being thrust into all of these… weird relationships and I don’t have the heart to turn any of them down, as well as not even knowing who I like better. It’s frustrating for me too.

I rolled my eyes and sighed, rolling over and laying my head on Zayn’s stomach. “I had no idea that boys were so emotional over the little things.” I spoke plainly.

He laughed and reached down to stroke my hair. “But we are. It’s not something that’s obvious to girls, but we really do get emotional just like girls do sometimes.”

“And who have you been emotional over, Zaynie-Bear?” I teased.

“What? No. No one. I haven’t personally experienced being all mushy over a girl before, but I’ve watched all my friends do it. It’s pretty common actually.”

I frowned a bit at his answer. “You mean, you’re not even mushy over me?”

“Well, you’re certainly the only girl I’ve ever been emotional about to begin with, so I guess you could say that I am. I just haven’t hit the level of my friends yet.”

“Ah. Mister tough guy, huh?” I sat up and started to act like him. “Look at me! I’m Zayn and I can’t show my emotions to other people! Don’t want anyone thinking I’ve gone soft!”

He laughed and pulled me back down to him. “Oh, shush you. That is not the case.” He defended.

I giggled and looked over to all the books on my floor. “You know, I really still need to study and do my homework.” I told him.

“Why? You’re already so smart. I wouldn’t think that you needed it.”

I laughed sarcastically. “Yeah, right. I am not that smart. Where did you get such a ridiculous idea from?” I got up and started to gather the books from the floor.

He rolled his eyes. “Whatever. You need to stop hating on yourself all the time.” He scolded.

“You mean that thing that you all did to me for two years?” I turned back to look at him.

He looked at me with hurt eyes.

My face softened and I turned back around. “Sorry.” I mumbled.

He walked over and helped me pick things up. “Do you want some help? I’m not that smart, but I can try.” He offered.

I smiled up at him. “That would be nice. Thanks.”

~

There was a loud knocking on the door. I furrowed my brow and got up.

“I’ll be right back.” I told Zayn.

I walked to the front door and opened it to see Harry standing there with his head down.

“Harry?” I asked quietly. “What are you doing here?”

His head snapped up at the sound of my voice. I looked at his eyes, but they were not what I was expecting. They were drowning in sadness and confusion. His whole face was different. He looked very troubled.

“Harry, what’s wrong?”

“I need to speak to you Eilana. Can I please come in?” He asked quietly.

Um, yeah, of course.” I let him in.

He stood there for a while, staring at the ground silently. I patiently waited for him to start.

“Eilana, I’m sorry. I’m really, really sorry. About what happened that day and about what I said earlier. That was stupid and I didn’t mean any of it. I-“

“What’s going on in here?” Zayn asked as he emerged from my room.

Harry looked at him in surprise and then to me. I thought he was going to blow up on me about having Zayn over this late. But he kept calm, surprisingly.

We all looked at each other for a few seconds before Zayn raised his eyebrows. “I think I’ll be going. This is obviously important. I’ll see you both later.” He made his way to the door and left us both in silence.

I immediately started to defend Zayn. “Harry, it’s not what it looks like. We were jus-“

“It’s none of my business.” He said plainly.

I stared at him in shock. “What?”

“It’s not my business what he was doing over here.” He repeated.

“You mean you don’t care? You’re not mad? You’re not going to blow up about it?” I asked in disbelief.

“No. I’ve done enough of that and look where it’s gotten me.”

It was certainly not what I was expecting. “Oh. Well…”

“As I was saying, the entire reason I came here was to tell you that I’m sorry. I didn’t mean any of what I said earlier. I was just mad at myself and I took it out on you without thinking. I take it all back. I’ve really been thinking about you. Well, us. I decided that I’m really going to give you your freedom this time. You’re right, you are not actually tied to me, and you should be able to spend time with everyone else when you want and however much you want. You need to get this sorted out, and I’m going to give you a chance to do that this time around.” He looked ashamed of his self as he looked up at me through his eyelashes.

I was speechless. Only a few hours ago he was telling me I was wrong, and now he’s telling me that he takes it all back. That was quick.

“It’s okay, Harry. I forgive you. Even though the only thing to forgive you for is the fact that you were so rude to me. Other than that, there’s nothing to apologize for.” I smiled.

He stopped biting his bottom lip and curved it into a small smile. He walked to me and pulled me to him, giving me a long, sweet kiss. “I swear I’ll be better this time.” He tucked some hair behind my ear. “I missed you so much, El. I don’t ever want to be that distant from you again.”

“I missed you too.” I got on my tiptoes and kissed the tip of his nose. “And I’m sorry for calling you a spoiled brat, but that doesn’t mean it’s not true.” I teased.

He smirked at me and chuckled. “Hey!” He narrowed his eyes. “Alright, I’ll admit it, I am a spoiled brat sometimes.” He smiled.

I giggled and kissed his lips. “But it’s okay. Maybe you’ll grow out of it one day.” I smirked.

“So, do I get to stay and have some fun now?” He asked cheekily.

“Actually, I really need to be studying. I’ve put it off for too long and I really need to get it done.” I told him regretfully.

His face turned into a comical frown. “But I’ve missed you so much. Come on, you don’t have five minutes?” He smirked, his hands trailing under the back of my shirt.

I gave him a look and smiled. “No. Sorry, Styles.”

He pouted like a little boy, sighing when he realized it wasn’t going to help him. “Fine. I’ll see you later then.” He kissed me shortly and hugged me before turning and walking to the door. He stopped with his hand on the doorknob and looked back at me. “I’m just happy that I didn’t screw everything up eternally.” He smiled.

I giggled and shook my head. “Of course not. And sorry about sending you home after all of this, but you know, school is kind of important.”

He smiled. “I understand. Don’t worry, there will be plenty of time later.” He winked before leaving.

Well, that’s that I suppose. One less thing I have to worry about...

~

“You have got to stop countering my attacks.” I shook my head at the screen in Niall’s room.

“No way! It’s part of the game, darlin’.” He chuckled.

“But I’m not good at it!” I huffed jokingly.

“Wait, are you admitting that you’re not always the pro at every game ever?” He smirked teasingly.

“Yes. I’ll admit it. Nothing wrong with that. We can’t all be perfect like you, Niall.” I laughed at myself, rolling my eyes.

“And what a shame it is.” He joked.

I scoffed and hit him on the arm. “You little shit! What are we going to do with you?”

“I was joking! Joking!” He defended, laughing.

I dropped the controller on the floor in front of me and crossed my arms. “That was not a fair win, Horan. You distracted me.” I grumbled.

“Well it’s not my fault you can’t stop looking at me.” He winked.

I couldn’t help but smile at him. “You’re so stupid.” I said, a smile still playing on my lips.

He smiled back. “I know.”

“But I love it.” I crawled over, getting on my knees behind him. I put my arms around his shoulders and hugged him. “I love you, Ni. You’re an awesome friend.” I smiled.

He turned his head to look at me with a smirk. “Did you just friend-zone me?” He asked.

I giggled, not realizing until now that it did sound that way. “Maybe.” I teased, kissing him on the cheek.

He grabbed my arm and pulled me forward, down onto the floor beside him. I landed on my back and smiled up at him when I saw the playful look on his face. “I don’t take kindly to being friend-zoned.” He warned with a smirk.

“Well what are you going to do about it?” I asked, trying to sound tough.

“I think this deserves the worst thing I can think of.” He looked down at me with an evil grin.

The tension was building as he stared at me silently. I stared back, awaiting his answer. His grin turned into a smile as he suddenly started to tickle my sides. I burst out laughing and started to squirm, trying to get away.

“Stop!” I giggled. “Ni! Ni, no!” I tried to get out between short breaths and laughs.

“Say I’m not in the friend-zone!”

“You’re not! You’re not in it!” I struggled to say, trying to push his hands away.

He stopped and looked down at me as I was breathing heavily. I looked over at him with narrowed eyes and a smile. He smirked back and wiggled his eyebrows. “That’s how you stay out of the friend-zone.” He chuckled.

“Effective.” I said, still trying to catch my breath.

He put a hand on the other side of me and leaned down, studying my face before slowly moving to kiss me. I laid there waiting for it, watching as his blue eyes got closer. When his lips touched mine, my whole body was overcome by a flood of emotions. I kissed back immediately, holding his face in my hands. He responded by deepening the kiss and brushing my cheek with his fingers. I ran my hands down his back, feeling the heat of his skin through his shirt. He stopped and looked at me for second, his eyes darting back and forth from my lips to my eyes. He softly placed a kiss under my jaw, moving down to the hot skin of my neck. A tiny moan escaped my lips as he began to suck softly at the crook of my neck. I pulled the back of his shirt up and dug my nails into him as his kisses got more harsh. His tongue ran slowly over the love bite he gave me, making my breathing shallow. I was completely lost in the feeling he was giving me. He came back up to my lips and gave me a long, sweet kiss before pulling back slightly and looking me in the eyes.

A smile grew on my face as I looked at him. “Definitely not in the friend-zone.” I giggled.

He smiled and kissed my cheek. He laid down beside me and I laid my head on his chest. He wrapped his arm around me and rubbed my arm. We laid in silence for a while, just zoned out into our own little world.

After a long while, I spoke up, a thought popping into my mind. “Ni, how’s your mom doing?” I asked quietly, hoping that would make it less horrible to hear.

“She’s doing good so far. They think they can treat it, but nothing is guaranteed. We just have to wait and see.” He tried to sound strong about it, but I could hear the crack in his voice.

“I have faith that she’ll get better. Always have hope, Ni.” I reached up and rubbed his cheek with my thumb comfortingly. “Don’t worry about it.”

He laughed bitterly. “That’s what mum says.” He mumbled. He looked down at me, his eyes full of sadness. “Don’t leave me, El.”

I could see all of the hurt and worry in his eyes. It was enough to bring tears to my own. “I won’t.” I said softly.

“Please, please don’t leave me. I need you.” He spoke barely above a whisper. He was trying so hard not to crack and I could see it. It broke my heart.

“I won’t, Niall.” I reassured him, kissing his cheek and hugging him as tightly as I could, as if it could hold him together somehow. “I won’t.”

Chapter Text

"But Louis, how am I supposed to clean the kitchen when you're attached to me?" I laughed, standing still as Louis kept his grip on me .

He sighed and reluctantly let me go. "Fine." He sat down on a bar stool. "I really miss our cuddles though. Remember when you couldn't keep your hands off of me? Those were the days..." He smirked to himself.

I rolled my eyes and smiled at him. "Couldn't keep my hands off you, huh? Forgive me, but I don't recall those days." I shook my head with a smile and continued to wipe the counter.

"I do. They were such happy days. I was the only guy you had to worry about, and I was the only one you gave your love to." He looked off into space at the memory before his face turned slightly sour. "These days, you hardly look at me, or give me cuddles anymore." He sighed.

I turned back around to face him. "Louis, what are you talking about? You're still just as important to me as you were all those days ago. That hasn't changed. It only seems that way because I do love other people now and you just think it's different." I told him.

"But remember when you used to hug me all the time for no reason? Just because you loved me. You don't do that anymore." He frowned.

I looked down, knowing that he was right. "Louis, that's not because my love for you is diminishing, it's because I'm stressed lately and I don't even think about hugging people anymore. It's not like I randomly hug anyone else." I shrugged.

"Maybe, but I still miss it, regardless of why." He put his chin in his hand and quietly watched me clean.

"Louis, I love you more than you know. Don't ever doubt that." I looked at him, feeling a bit sad that he was worried about such a ridiculous thing.

"That's my line." He mumbled barely over a whisper.

"I actually think I love you more, though." I smiled, walking over and giving him a hug.

He couldn't stop the smile on his face as I rocked him back and forth in my arms while singing that I loved him over and over. He began to laugh and rolled his eyes.

"See? My love makes you smile. It's still there, Lou-Bear. And it'll never go away. Whether you want it to or not."

"Why would I want that?" He asked.

"Want what?" I asked.

"For your love to go away? That sounds terrible." He made a sad face.

I giggled and kissed him on the cheek. "Well it won't, so don't worry." I went back to my cleaning, trying to finish it quick so that Louis and I could go do something fun.

It was quiet for a few minutes. Just the sound of my productive hands and the shuffling of my footsteps could be heard for a while before Louis’ voice broke the silence.

"Tell me about everything." He said.

I stopped sweeping and looked at him. "About what?" I quirked an eyebrow.

"...Everything." He raised his brow and chuckled. "What's going on with you and Harry and Zayn?" He asked nonchalantly.

I felt my heartbeat get faster at the sudden question. I guess I liked to forget that he was aware of any of it, so when he mentioned it, it was really uncomfortable for me. "You really want to know?" I asked slowly.

"Of course. Especially since it's stressing you out so bad. Maybe I can help or something." He shrugged.

I mentally gave him a look. I know he was just curious. "Well, it all started a while back with Harry. I had started liking him without realizing it, and we just kind of knew we liked each other. And then there was Zayn. Well, Zayn's is a bit more... well it's... let's just say he opens up to me about things, and so he feels close to me. I guess because I realized he has a soft side, that I started to view him differently and now I kind of have a thing for him. I'm not really sure that I like him like that though." I tried to keep it simple and spare him the details.

He nodded his head slowly. "And what about Niall? How are you and him doing?" He asked.

"We're doing well. I mean, as far as romantic feelings go, they're still there if that's what you're asking about." I continued to sweep, trying to act as if talking about all of this with him didn't bother me.

"I'm surprised you don't have a thing for Liam." He commented.

I looked at him weirdly. "Why do you say that?"

"Because he's always there for you. He's helped you so much, and he's never been anything but nice to you, and you're never anything but nice to him. And let's be honest, he's not a bad looking lad. Even I can see that. I just thought it would have been a natural thing." He shrugged, brushing off the thought.

I thought about it for a minute. He was right, it was a little odd.

"So you're having a hard time picking between them, right?" He asked, referring to the other three.

I snapped out of my thoughts and looked at him shortly before looking back down at the floor I was sweeping. "Yeah."

"And why do you think it is that you can't choose?"

"Because it's just not easy. It's hard to tell which one I really like properly. Especially with all the treatment they give me." I sighed, putting up the broom.

"Has it ever occurred to you that maybe you're not even looking at the right guy?" He asked, eyeing me carefully.

"You mean, maybe it's none of them?" I asked. He was right. Maybe that's why. Maybe it's so hard to figure out because none of them are it. "Louis, you're a genius!" I smiled at him.

"I get that a lot." He winked.

I hugged him tightly. "You're right. This whole time, it must have been Liam. I just didn't see it because I saw him as nothing more than a friend. But you're right, you're absolutely right!" I noticed his face was one of confusion. He smacked his head with his palm, and let his forehead hit the counter.

"What's wrong?" I asked, confused.

Louis' P.O.V

It was shattering me to hear her talk about how much she liked all of the other guys. This was the first time I wasn't included in something of hers, and it was bugging me beyond belief. It just didn't feel right. I wanted to just scream out that I loved her more than any of them, that I loved her first, that she should be with me, but I knew I couldn't do that. It would only cause her more confusion and stress. I certainly didn't want that.

"Has it ever occurred to you that maybe you're not even looking at the right guy?" I asked, hoping she would get the hint and realize I was talking about myself.

"You mean, maybe it's none of them?" She asked, her face lighting up in realization.

I got excited, waiting for her to turn to me and tell me she sees it clearly now, that I'm the one.

"Louis, you're a genius!" She walked straight to me.

"I get that a lot." I winked at her.

This is it. This is where she kisses me and tells me she's been so wrong this whole time, and that she doesn't know how she didn't see it sooner.

She hugged me happily. "You're right. This whole time, it must have been Liam. I just didn't see it because I saw him as nothing more than a friend. But you're right, you're absolutely right!"

My heart sank to the floor. She thought I was talking about Liam. Her first thought wasn't even me. I don't know why I thought it would be. That was a dumb move on my part. I have to accept the fact that I'm not the only one she thinks about anymore.

I smacked myself in the head for being such an idiot, and threw it forward onto the counter top.

"What's wrong?" She asked, clearly clueless.

Oh, nothing. Besides the fact that you don't seem to see me as nothing but a friend anymore and that I just screwed up my chances of being with you even more, everything else it just damn skippy.

I picked my head up and smiled as genuinely as I could, blinking a few times at my own stupidity. "Nothing. Nothing at all." I said blankly.

She looked at me strangely and shrugged once she realized I wasn't going to tell her. "Okay then." She stared at me for a minute before speaking again. "Who's house are we hanging at, do you know?" She asked, referring to our usual Saturday night get together.

"I think Liam's." I cringed as his name fell from my lips, only reminded me of how lucky he was.

She stiffened up too, I noticed. She turned around suddenly with a terrified look on her face. "What am I going to tell him?"

"What do you mean? Are you going to tell him you like him? Are you even sure that you do?" I asked back.

"I don't know. I mean, I really think I do, but I don't have the courage to tell him that to his face."

"Then don't." I said simply.

I was just hoping that somehow, a miracle would occur and she would forget about liking him. Yes I was selfish, but I would do anything to have her.

"You're right. I shouldn't be so blunt about it. Maybe I'll just test him, drop some hints or something. Yeah, much better." She mumbled to herself.

"Eilana, can I ask you something?" I decided that I should just ask her. Why not? I don't have to tell her anything, I could just ask her how she felt about me at least.

"Mhmm?" She asked, leaning against the counter.

"Eilana, do you-"

Her phone started to ring and she pulled it out of her pocket. "Sorry, just a sec." She answered it. "Hello?" She said as she put it up to her ear.

Eilana's P.O.V

“Hello?”

Hey, El. Just thought I would let you know we're all getting together at my house tonight. You're coming over too, right?

“Of course, Liam! What time are we all meeting up?”

Uh, about eight-ish. Sound good?

“Yeah! Sounds great.”

I found myself smiling like an idiot at the sound of his voice. My stomach was full of nerves, and I was slightly shaking.

Awesome. I'll see you tonight then, love.

“See you.”

Bye.

I looked back to Louis with a stupidly huge smile on my face. "You were right, it’s Liam's house tonight." I told him.

He sighed slightly and looked away. "You seem happy." He mumbled.

"Well, I'm more nervous than anything." I told him truthfully.

"Why?" He gave me a weird look. "It's the same Liam, why does he only make you nervous now?"

"I don't know, he just does. I guess because now I'm aware." I shrugged. “Hey, weren’t you going to ask me something?”

He bit his lip and looked down. “It’s nothing. Nevermind.”

~

“But what if he knows?” I asked Louis as we pulled up to Liam’s house.

“He can’t read your mind, Eilana.” He rolled his eyes as he put it in park.

“But what if he can?” I freaked out.

“He can’t. Trust me.” He assured, stepping outside of the car.

I checked myself in the mirror before Louis opened my door and pulled me out. “You look beautiful, don’t worry. You always do.” He smiled faintly.

I smiled back and nervously walked to the door. I let Louis knock this time, seeing as I would probably manage to screw it up somehow.

“Just remember, it’s only Liam.” He reminded me.

I nodded my head and took a big breath.

He’s right. It’s only Liam. It’s not like anything has changed. I just need to keep calm. This is actually quite ridiculous when I really think about it. It’s just good ole’, sweet, caring, Liam.

My eyes widened when the door opened quickly. I tensed up as I walked through the door. I decided it was best to not hug Liam right now. I don’t know why I was being like this. It’s ridiculous.

“Hey! Where are you going?” Liam chuckled as he shut the door.

I kept walking, trying to make it to the kitchen where everyone else was. I was grabbed suddenly by a pair of strong arms as they lifted me and twirled me around.

“I said where are you going, you cheeky little girl.” I heard Liam’s low voice as he put me down and pulled me into him.

I couldn’t help but giggle as he nuzzled his face into my neck playfully. “Li!” I squealed and pushed him away, laughing.

“What? Thought you were going to avoid my hug, did you?” He poked my stomach.

I looked down shyly and blushed. “No. I just didn’t hear you.” I lied quietly.

“Are you blushing, love? Whatever for?” He chuckled, trying to see my face clearly.

“No!” I defended quickly, running away from him and into the kitchen.

Okay, so this whole dropping hints thing wasn’t working out for me. I could hardly look him in the eyes.

He chased after me, but I made it there before he could catch me.

“Come back here!” He yelled, close behind me.

I watched him spring through the doorway as I hid behind Louis, giggling. “No way!”

“I’m going to get you, no matter what you do. You can’t stay behind a shield all night.” He narrowed his eyes at me, a smirk on his lips.

I stuck my tongue out at him and he came running at me. I squeaked and ran around behind Harry. He stuck his arms out in an attempt to stop Liam from getting to me.

“What is going on here?” Harry asked.

“Liam is trying to get me!” I said excitedly.

“Well obviously. I meant why.” Harry clarified.

“I don’t know. Ask him.” I shrugged, getting ready to run if he should spring at me again.

“May I ask, Liam, just what you are doing?” Zayn asked lazily from the corner of the room.

“Nothing.” He laughed, standing up straight and walking over to the refrigerator, getting a drink.

“Hey.” Harry said, turning around to give me a hug.

I hugged him back. “Hello.” I smiled up at him.

“How are you?” He asked, giving me a dimpled smile.

“Good. How about you?”

“I’m well, thank you.” He responded.

I walked over to Niall and gave him a tight hug. “Hi.” I grinned cheekily up at the blonde.

He smiled back and rocked me side to side like he always does.

I looked at Zayn and waved. “Hey, Zayn.”

He responded with a small smile.

“What are we doing?” Niall asked.

“What do you want to do?” Liam asked.

“Let’s bowl!” Harry chimed in quickly.

“Sounds good to me.” Niall said.

We all walked up to the bowling room he had across the house. I watched it light up slowly as he flipped on all of the switches. I shook my head, still not used to the ridiculous lives they led.

“Alright, who’s on what team?” Louis asked.

“I want to be on Niall’s team!” I said quickly, grabbing his arm.

“I want to be on Eilana’s team!” Louis said right after me, grabbing my arm and imitating me.

I smacked his arm as he made me look like an idiot. “Hey! I do not bat my eyelashes like that!” I defended.

“Okay, then that leaves me, Harry, and Zayn.” Liam said.

“We’re going to crush you like ants!” Niall said, pointing at them.

“Whatever. We’re going to beat you so bad, it’s going to change your life!” Harry joked.

“Oh please, Harry. Need I remind you what happened the last time you played a game of bowling with me?” I smirked, remembering my victory.

“That was one time!” He whined.

I laughed in his face and picked out a bright red bowling ball. Louis and Niall also picked up the same color.

“You’re all using the same color?” Harry asked, looking unimpressed.

“Yeah, because we’ve got our shit together!” I joked.

Harry rolled his eyes and picked up an orange one. “We’ll see about that when the game is over.” He smirked.

~

“Whoo!” We all chanted in unison, giving each other a fist bump.

“Oh shut up!” Harry said over our yelling. “It was one game!” He defended.

“Yeah, for us. But that’s two for me!” I giggled. “Current score, Harry zero, me two.” I teased.

He rolled his eyes again. “Are you done?”

“For now. Don’t think I won’t bring this up later.” I laughed.

“Will you guys rivalry ever end?” Liam asked.

“No.” We said at the same time.

“Let’s go swimming.” Zayn suddenly piped up.

We all looked at him weirdly. “What?” I asked.

“I said, let’s go swimming. I haven’t been in a pool in a while.” He shrugged.

“Let’s go!” Louis raced downstairs.

Everyone followed shortly after. Liam had a heated indoor pool, with a waterfall and a water slide.

“I don’t have anything to wear.” I told Liam as he walked toward the changing rooms on the side of the room.

He turned back to me. “Just wear the one you left over here last time.” He walked into one of the rooms, and came back out with my black lacey bikini.

I cringed when I saw it. Louis bought it for me a long time ago and I never wore it until Niall saw it and asked me to wear it last time we swam here.

I took it from him reluctantly, but smiled sweetly at him. “Thanks.” I said.

He noticed my hesitation and looked at me curiously. “Everything okay?” He asked.

“Yeah. I just don’t feel very comfortable in this.” I said quietly.

“How come? You look great in it.” He said sweetly.

“It’s just so… not really there.” I said, holding it up to see the two very small pieces of fabric.

Liam laughed and gently pushed me towards the changing room. “Don’t worry. We won’t all stare at you like a piece of meat. I promise. I’ll tell the guys not to stare if it’ll make you feel better.” He offered.

“Thanks, Liam.” I smiled lightly and closed the door.

It was nice in here. There was a full length mirror, a chair, a few hangers, and a shower all in one little room. There was five of them all on one side of the room. Smart idea actually. If I should ever have the chance to live in such a luxurious house, I would put all the little finishing touches in it like this.

I got changed and slowly opened the door, hearing them already splashing around in the water. I walked out slowly and stood awkwardly on the side of the pool.

“I’m on top of the world!” I heard Harry yell before jumping off of the top of the water fall. I watched as he made a giant splash, plunging to the bottom.

I looked around at the boys in the pool, feeling like something was off.

Harry, Liam, Zayn, Niall… Where’s Louis?

I shrieked when someone picked me up and kept running straight into the pool with me in their arms. I held onto them as we went under, squeezing my eyes shut. I opened them as we slowly sunk to the bottom and saw those familiar blue eyes looking back at me. We surfaced and Louis whipped his head around, shaking the water out of his hair before smiling cheekily at me.

“Looking for me, love?” He asked.

“You’re so bad. That scared me, you ass.”

He laughed and let me down. “Well you can’t very well just stand by the pool all night, can you?”

“I wasn’t going to, thank you very much.” I sassed.

He made a funny face as I swam off. I made my way over to Zayn, who I noticed was chilling on the steps of the pool, tampering with his phone as always.

“What are you doing over here?” I asked, sitting down next to him and bumping him with my shoulder.

He looked up at me and paused. “I can’t swim.” He said plainly.

I raised my eyebrow at him and a small smile tugged at the corners of my mouth. “You? You can’t swim?”

“Yeah.”

“Mister big bad, scary, brooding, bad boy doesn’t swim?”

“Yeah.” He repeated himself.

“How does that happen?” I asked curiously.

“Because mum and dad never had time to spend on teaching me the little things like that.” He looked away.

“Oh. Well that’s sad.” I said, frowning slightly.

“Not really. It’s only sad if somehow I get knocked into a pool one day and I drown. Then maybe it’s sad. But the fact itself does not sadden me, no.” He shrugged.

I gave him wide eyes and laughed. “You’re weird.” I teased.

“So I’ve heard.” He smiled.

“So if you can’t swim, then why did you want to go swimming?”

“Just because I can’t swim doesn’t mean I don’t enjoy relaxing in a pool like a normal person.”

I nodded my head. “Oh, right. That makes sense.”

“Eilana! Come here!” Niall called.

I snapped my head around to see him on the other side of the pool with Harry and Louis. “Coming.” I said, swimming over.

When I got there, they were laughing about something. “I swear if one of you just made a that’s what she said joke I’m going to hit you both.” I said with narrowed eyes.

They both looked at me guiltily and then cracked up laughing again.

“You’re so immature.” I smiled and rolled my eyes. “What do you want?” I asked Niall.

“Come on.” He said, starting to walk out of the pool.

“Where are we going?” I asked.

“Up there.” He said, pointing to the waterfall.

“No way!” I protested, crossing my arms.

“Aw, come one! Please! It’s great fun!” He tried to convince me.

“Are you crazy?” I asked.

“No, I just want to have fun. Come on, El. For me? It’s fun, I promise!” He begged.

I sighed and climbed out of the water. “I can’t believe I’m doing this.” I mumbled as he took my hand.

He led me quickly up the stairs in the back. We got to the edge and I looked down. It seemed much higher from up here. I looked down at the four boys, looking up at us and waiting for me to jump.

“You can do it, love!” Louis encouraged.

“You’ll be fine!” Harry said.

Liam just gave me a warm smile and a thumbs up.

I looked down one more time and to Niall at my side. I gripped his hand tighter and gave him a frightened look.

He gave me a sympathetic smile. “Aw! Darlin, it’s not that far down. Don’t worry, I’m right here. I’m not going to let a thing happen to you.” He smiled reassuringly.

I nodded slowly and took a big breath.

“On three.” He said. “One.” He said slowly.

I swallowed hard and tried not to focus on the distance.

“Two.”

I took another breath and let it out slowly.

“Three!”

We both ran forward and jumped off the edge.

It happened so quickly. Before I knew it, we were hitting the water. The muffled sound filled my ears as the water surrounded me. I swam up to the top immediately and took a big breath when I surfaced.

“See? It wasn’t that bad!” Harry said from a few feet away.

“That was horrifying!” I corrected. “But… it was fun.” I smiled.

“I told you!” Niall said as he swam up behind me.

“Where did Louis go?” I asked. I was always losing track of that boy.

Liam pointed behind me to the slide. I turned around to see Louis standing at the top with a mischievous smile on his face.

“Louis, what are you doing?” I asked quickly in a panic.

He only smiled wider at my question.

“Louis?!? I asked again.

He threw himself forward onto the slide on his stomach, sliding down head first. He came up quickly and threw his arms up in the air. “Whoo!” He yelled, his voice echoing off the walls.

I shook my head and laughed. “Louis, you idiot. That’s dangerous.”

“But fun!” He said loudly.

“Yeah, well wait until your head is cracked open and spilling blood, then tell me how fun it is.” I joked.

They all laughed and Louis pouted at me.

“What? I’m just concerned.” I said, running my fingers through his wet hair.

He hugged me and pulled me up. “Aww, you mean you care?” He said, smiling cockily.

“Yes.” I said simply.

“She said yes! She said yes!” He started yelling and looking around excitedly.

I giggled and rolled my eyes. “You’re such an adorable idiot.”

~

I walked to the kitchen slowly, shivering as the cool air hit my wet skin. I pulled at my swimsuit and opened the cabinet, taking out a cup. I opened the refrigerator and poured myself some apple juice.

“There you are.” I heard Niall’s voice.

I looked up to see him walking into the room. “Hey.” I grinned.

“Thirsty?” He asked, looking at the drink in my hand.

“Yeah. Want some?” I offered him the cup.

“You didn’t put a roofie in it, did you?” He gave me a suspicious look and then smiled.

I laughed and he took the cup from my hands. “What are you doing in here?” I asked as he took a sip.

He gave it back to me and leaned against the counter. “Just tired of swimming. Wondered where you went.” He shrugged lightly, crossing his arms.

I leaned against the counter next to him, staring at the pictures on the wall.

“You still look just as sexy in that as the first time I saw you in it.” He said, looking me over.

I turned my attention to his wandering eyes. “Ni! Don’t. It makes me uncomfortable…” I crossed my arms, trying to cover as much of myself as I could.

He grabbed my arms and held them out, bringing me to stand in front of him. He looked at me with a raised brow. “Why? You look so beautiful. Can’t I just admire it?” He smirked.

I blushed and looked away. “Well I don’t like it.” I mumbled.

He pulled me close to him and put my arms around him. He pressed his lips to my neck. “Well I do.” He whispered in my ear.

I blushed harder and buried my face into his shoulder. “Ni, stop. You’re making me blush.”

He placed a few more kisses down my neck and on my shoulder. “Well you shouldn’t. You should already know how gorgeous you are, Eilana.” He grazed my neck with his nose as he raised his lips to my ear. “You know how I feel about you.”

I kissed his bare shoulder, feeling rather affectionate at the moment. When I was with Niall, it just felt natural. I sucked at the wet skin, earning a moan of approval from him. He brushed his fingers through my wet hair, placing an arm around me. I slowly trailed up his neck and to his lips. He looked at me with daring eyes. I kissed him with want. He returned the kiss, holding me at the small of my back. His warm hand on my cold, bare skin was like static shock. His tongue brushed my bottom lip and I parted my lips for him. I could taste the chocolate he was eating earlier on his tongue. I smiled at the sweet taste and mentally rolled my eyes at him.

“I miss you, El.” He pressed his forehead against my own when he drew back.

I stared at him with a small smile as we caught our breath.

“So beautiful.” He whispered with a smile.

I kissed his lips again. “You should see my view.” I smirked, looking him up and down with my lip between my teeth.

We both chuckled and rubbed our noses together. We jumped back from each other when we heard a noise close to us.

“There you guys are.” Liam said, smiling lightly at us. “We’re all getting out.” He said, setting his towel down on one of the chairs.

“Cool. I’m going to go get my stuff.” Niall said, leaving the room.

I looked at Liam and saw him staring at me. He smiled and I smiled back, feeling the nerves building in the pit of my stomach.

He said nothing as he opened a top cabinet and reached up high for something. I watched his back as he moved, the tiny water drops running slowly down his bare skin as his hair dripped more water onto him, making his skin glisten as he slowly made his way around the kitchen.

I was almost in a trance staring at his muscles flexing as he gripped the heavy bottle of orange juice. I couldn’t avert my eyes from his skin. My gaze trailed slowly down to the exposed hip bones that stuck out from his low slung shorts, taking note of the small trail of hair that led somewhere I shouldn’t even think about.

“Eilana?” I heard his low voice call and I snapped out of it.

“Hm?” I asked quickly.

He smiled cheekily at me, probably having caught me. “I said, what are you doing tomorrow?” He repeated himself, chuckling lightly at me.

“Oh. Um, nothing I think.” I answered quietly, blushing madly.

I can’t believe he just saw me checking him out. Fuck. I must look like a tomato right now. That’s attractive.

“Wanna go see a movie or something? I haven’t been to the movies in a while.” He asked.

“Uh, sure.” I said slowly. “I’m going to go get dressed.” I told him.

“Okay.” He said, smiling at me from behind his cup.

I walked back to the pool. I walked by Harry as he was leaving his changing room and he smirked at me and slapped my ass.

I gave him a look and rolled my eyes before entering my dressing room and closing the door. I turned on the shower and stood under the warm water, removing my swimsuit and washing my hair. I dried off with the clean towel in the corner of the room and got dressed in my normal clothes.

I stepped out and walked to the living room to see the boys spread out on the couches looking tired. I smiled to myself and walked over to Louis, slowly combing my fingers through his hair. He looked up at me and smiled.

“Ready to go?” He asked.

“Yeah. I’m a little tired myself.”

“Alright. Let’s go then.” He stood up tiredly and yawned, stretching.

Everyone followed slowly, all walking to the foyer. I hugged Zayn, even against his act of not wanting it. I winked at him and he gave me a small smile quickly before pushing me away slightly.

“Bye.” Harry said, pulling me into a hug and kissing my cheek.

I smiled at him and walked to Niall to hug him too. I wrapped my arms around him tightly and kissed his cheek. “Bye, Niall.” I hugged him a little longer, knowing he needed it.

“Are you going to skip out on me again?” Liam teased.

“No.” I smiled, hugging him too.

He pulled me into him tightly, giving me one of his famous bear hugs before letting me go. “See you tomorrow.” He said, winking with a smile.

I blushed again, recalling earlier events of the day and turned around quickly. “Let’s go.” I told Louis, dragging him out the door.

~

The first thing I did when we got back to my house was lay down in my bed. I didn’t even bother to get changed. I was too tired. Louis turned off the lights and pulled his shirt off before climbing in behind me.

“Today was fun.” I said with sigh.

“Yeah.” Louis agreed, yawning again.

I smiled as I felt his warm arm wrap around me, pulling me back into his chest. I closed my eyes and let the soft sound of his breathing calm me. I was drifting off when I heard Louis’ voice.

“Did Niall hold you like this?”

I furrowed my brow and looked back at him. “What?”

What a random question…

“I want to know. Did he hold you like I do?”

I was silent for a while, trying to make sense of why he would ask such an odd question. “Well, if you’re asking if he held me at all, then yes. But he didn’t hold me the same way that you do. It was different, yes.” I answered, still confused.

He didn’t say anything after that.

“Why?” I asked after a short silence.

“I just wanted to know that I’m special in some way.” He spoke.

I didn’t know what he meant by that, but it saddened me anyway. I could tell there was something to it that I wasn’t understanding.

Louis, what does that mean? I want to understand…

Chapter Text

I began to shiver at how cold the theater was. I had a jacket on but I was still cold. I debated snuggling up to Liam to warm myself, but decided against it when I realized I was way too fucking chicken.

Ever since Louis brought it to my attention yesterday that maybe Liam and I were meant to be, I haven't been able to fully relax around him like I use to. Which sucked, because now would be a great time to shamelessly bury myself into his chest. But, that wasn't happening. Not as long as I was being a shy little coward.

I tried to take my mind off of my body temperature and focus on the movie. I managed, but it wasn't so easy. It didn't seem this cold when we got here, but as the hour passed, my temperature dropped. I just came to terms with being cold for the remaining hour.

Liam looked at me after a few minutes, studying me with a small smirk on his face. "Cold?" He asked quietly.

I looked at him shyly and nodded my head.

He put his arm around me and pulled me against him. He was so warm and it instantly heated me up. Although I think half of it was just the fact that I was blushing. I brought my feet up into my chair and hesitantly laid my head on his shoulder. He grabbed my hand in his, covering it almost completely, and holding it in his lap.

I almost didn't notice my shallow breathing until the movie went silent for a second. I mentally slapped myself for acting so ridiculous around one of my best friends.

This is stupid. It's just Liam. I need to relax and stop being so damn shy.

I finally let myself relax into him, only then realizing how tense I really was. I sighed at the warmth of his body and continued watching the movie, finally comfortable.

~

"That movie was awesome! That explosion was boss!" I said, walking next to Liam as we exited the building.

He chuckled and looked over at me with a smile. "You sure aren't like most girls."

"Is that a bad thing?" I asked.

"No, it's a good thing." He assured me. "You're not boring." He poked my side.

"Hey!" I poked him back but it didn't have much effect on him. I rolled my eyes. "So not fair."

He laughed at my lack of strength and grabbed my hand as we walked back to his car. "I'm the man, I'm supposed to be stronger and bigger."

"Well that doesn't mean you should abuse it." I joked.

"Abuse it?! I only poked you, you silly little girl."

"I am not little!" I protested.

"But you are." He teased.

"Well, you're... you're... a giant!"

He chuckled at my comeback. "No, I only seem that way to you because you're tiny. And even if I was, that still means I have power over you, so I wouldn't say that's a bad thing." He shrugged.

I narrowed my eyes at him. "You're just... a meanie." I struggled to think of anything negative to say about him, sadly that was the only thing that came to mind.

He laughed again. "No I'm not." He said calmly with a smirk.

"Yeah, I know." I sighed, giving up. He was right. He wasn't even mean. I had nothing.

“Are you hungry?” He asked as he opened the door for me.

“A little.” I said, sitting down.

He went around and got in the drivers seat. “Alright then. Want to go get food?”

“Yeah.” I said quietly, my shyness returning.

It seemed like every time I got too far away from him, my nervousness came back.

I told him to pick the place and he drove somewhere I was unfamiliar with. I realized after a while that where we were going was obviously expensive, as the buildings and scenery got increasingly nicer and grander looking.

I rolled my eyes with a smile. “You’re not going to spend a bunch of money on me, are you?”

“It’s not a bunch of money to me.” He argued with a grin, pulling into a parking lot with a lot of expensive looking cars.

“Liam.” I warned.

“What?” He asked innocently. “Don’t worry about it. I eat here all the time, it’s really not that expensive. I promise.”

I sighed and shook my head, smirking at his show of money.

He got out and handed his keys to the guy waiting patiently before he came around and opened the door for me. “Come on.” He held out his hand for me to take.

I grabbed it and got out, letting him lead me into the restaurant. I gasped as we walked inside. “Liam James Payne.” I said sternly. The whole place was absolutely breath taking, but it was obviously very grand. It was two stories tall if you counted the balcony that wrapped around the room, looking down on the giant stage in the middle of the floor, where acrobats and magicians and other things were performing all at once. It reminded me a bit of Cirque Du Soleil.

He watched me look around with wide eyes. “What? They have the best food, I swear.” He laughed.

I gave him a disapproving look. “Best food my ass.” I mumbled.

He chuckled at me and pulled me along to our table. He held my chair out for me and I couldn’t help but smile as I sat down. He sat down across from me and smiled as he saw I was still looking around in disbelief.

“This is really ridiculous, you know.” I commented, never peeling my eyes away from the show.

“Well it’s normal to me.” He shrugged.

~

“What did I tell you?” He looked at me with a smirk.

“Okay, okay, that was the best food I’ve had in a long time.” I admitted, crossing my arms.

The waiter came by and left the check. I glanced at it before Liam picked it up and almost choked on my water at the amount of numbers.

“Whoa. You can’t be serious.” I looked at him with wide eyes.

He looked at me with a blank expression. “What?” He asked, clueless.

“The check. Dude, no way.” I shook my head.

“Oh, that. Yeah it’s no big deal. I’ve spent more than that here before.” He shrugged.

“Are you serious? For food?”

“Yeah.” He nodded slowly, smiling at me funnily. “Look, it’s how I was raised. I’m used to it. Don’t worry.” He dug out his wallet and laid down more money than I had ever seen in my entire life down on the table.

Okay, I’m exaggerating. But it was way more money than it should have been.

I looked at him as he put his wallet back. He looked back at me and smiled. After I didn’t say anything, his face changed to a curious one.

“What?” He asked.

“Is this a date?” I asked timidly.

He smiled at my question. “No. This is just two friends hanging out.”

I put my head down in embarrassment. “Oh.” I said quietly.

“Why? Do you want it to be?” He asked, a smirk on his face and a playful tone to his voice.

I looked up at him through my eyelashes. “No.” I said quickly, looking back down when I saw his face.

He let it go and stood up, holding his hand out for me. I took it and we left. I trailed quietly and shyly behind him, not even wanting to make eye contact. I avoided looking at him all the way back to his house.

~

He shut the door behind me and kicked off his shoes. I did the same and stood there awkwardly with my head down.

He noticed this and smirked at me. “Hey, what’s up with you?” He asked, lifting my chin with his fingers.

“Nothing.” I replied quietly.

He looked at me curiously. “And why are you being so quiet?”

I just looked at him, not wanting to tell him.

“Are you okay? Did I say something wrong? Are you mad at me?” He tilted his head.

I lightly shook my head no and looked away.

He narrowed his eyes in thought and sighed. “Alright then, whatever you say. Come on.” He said softly as he held his hand out for me.

There was no way I was about to touch him. I was still far too embarrassed about earlier. I kept my head down and walked right past him, up the stairs and to his room.

He followed behind me quietly and shut the door to his room. “Eilana, are you sure there’s nothing you want to tell me?” He tried again.

“Yep.” I replied shortly, sitting down on his bed. I played with my hands for a while as he put up his jacket.

He came and sat down next to me. I got up and moved to the couch, feeling nervous being that close to him right now. I was waiting for him to tease me, make a joke about how lame I am for thinking that he still liked me.

He said he would wait for me, but what if he got tired of waiting and moved on? What then? It was terribly stupid of me to think that he might still like me after all this time. After all, he made that promise a long time ago.

“Eilana, what’s wrong?” He asked again, coming to sit on the couch by me.

I started to get up but he pulled me back down and put his arms around me. I blushed and put my head down.

“Hey, look at me.” He lifted my head to meet his gaze. “Tell me, love. What’s bothering you?” He gave me a sad look.

“Nothing.” I tried to squirm free.

He held me tightly to him. “You’re not going anywhere until you tell me what’s wrong. Now spit it out.” He said sternly.

I sighed heavily and gave up. “I don’t want to tell you.” I mumbled.

“Why not?”

I didn’t reply.

“Does it have to do with me?” He asked.

I nodded my head after a while.

“Don’t think I haven’t noticed your weird behavior towards me the last two days. Now what is it? What did I do?” He cradled my face in his hands, forcing me to look at him.

I certainly couldn’t tell him while I was staring into his eyes. I don’t even think I could tell him at all. I was just too scared of rejection.

“You didn’t do anything.” I answered.

He gave me a confused face. He stared at me for a while before a small smirk of realization settled on his face. “Do you perhaps, like me?”

I could feel my blush immediately and turned my face.

He grabbed it again gently. “You do.” His smirk grew wider. “Eilana, why didn’t you just tell me?” He chuckled.

“Because I thought maybe you didn’t like me back.” I mumbled.

“Eilana, you know I like you. Why would you think otherwise?”

“I don’t know. I guess because you didn’t show any interest in me anymore. I thought maybe you got tired of waiting.” I shrugged.

“I wasn’t showing any interest because you were shaken up enough with all the other boys being all over you. I didn’t want to add to that. And besides, I thought you would never like me anyway. But get one thing straight, I would wait for you forever. When I make a promise, I keep it. Especially if it’s to you.”

“So, you still like me then?” I smiled.

“Of course I do.” He chuckled.

I hugged him tightly, finally being able to relax around him again. It was such a relief to know he still had feelings for me.

He pulled away and gently kissed me. It was a short kiss, but it made me smile. He looked at me with his dark eyes and smiled. “You should have just told me, love.” He brushed my cheek.

“Oh please, Liam. You know how shy I am.”

“Well I hope you’re not too shy to let me kiss you.” He smirked.

I blushed and he kissed me softly again, tangling his hands in my hair. I kissed back and gripped his shoulders, feeling them flex through his shirt. I lightly moaned into the kiss as he ran his hand down my back, resting it right above the top of my jeans. I parted from his lips and climbed onto his lap. He gave me wide eyes as he looked up at me. I started to kiss his neck softly, feeling him relax into my touches. I slowly worked my way up to the sensitive skin under his ear, sucking at it softly. He gave me a low groan and slipped his hands under my shirt, running his warm hands slowly upwards. I licked slowly up his jawline, smiling at the sounds of satisfaction he was giving me.

Suddenly he gently pushed me away. “Wait. El, I don’t want to rush it this time.” He said, biting his lip.

I raised my brow at him and frowned at first, but then I smiled when I realized how sweet he really is. “Okay. That sounds good to me.” I agreed.

He sighed, still looking at me. I could see the regret on his features. “I can’t believe I just stopped you. Damn, El.” He squeezed his eyes shut and let his head fall back.

I giggled at him. “Good?” I asked.

“Definitely.” He smiled at me.

I tapped the tip of his nose and giggled at how cute he was. He narrowed his eyes at me playfully and began to tickle me. I squealed and began to squirm on him.

He stopped almost immediately and made an O with his mouth, furrowing his brow. “Okay, maybe tickling you on my lap isn’t a good idea.”

I laughed and climbed off of him. “Sorry.” I smirked.

~

“Hey Harry.” I said, closing the door.

“Hello, beautiful.” He kissed me on the lips and hugged me.

I hugged him back and slapped his hand when it squeezed my backside. “Harry.” I warned playfully.

He smiled cheekily at me and walked past me into the living room. “Hey, Louis.” I heard him say as I walked into the kitchen.

I poured myself some lemonade and joined the boys in the other room. I saw that they were sitting next to each other. I raised my brow at them and put my hand on my hip. “You boys bromance is leaving me with nowhere to sit.” I said.

They chuckled and Harry moved to the other side of the couch. I sat down between them.

“So what is this I hear about you going on a date with Liam yesterday?” Harry asked.

“What? First of all, it wasn’t a date. Second of all, where did you hear that?”

He looked at Louis, who was currently pretending to be sucked into the television so he could avoid my glare.

“Well, you heard wrong. We were just hanging out.” I corrected.

“Do you like him too?” He asked.

“Yes.” I said simply. “Or rather…-It’s hard not to like all of you, you know? Don’t judge, bro.”

He chuckled at me. “I’m not judging, just asking.” He shrugged.

“Louis, you can’t just go around telling people I went on a date when it’s not true.” I said, staring at him.

He was still pretending not to hear me.

“Louis.”

Still not even a look in my direction.

“Louis!” I said louder.

Nothing.

I reached over and pinched him as hard as I could on his thigh. He yelped and jerked away, looking at me like I was crazy.

“What?” He asked.

“I said, you can’t just go around giving people your embellished version of my life.” I stared at him blankly.

He raised his eyebrow at me. “What? I do not. Harry asked what’s been going on with you, so I told him. It sounded like a date to me…” He trailed off, rubbing his thigh.

I rolled my eyes. “Well next time he asks, tell him to ask me.”

“Fine, fine.” He said.

“I’ll be right back.” I said, getting up and going to my room to get my phone charger.

I looked through my drawers, digging around until I found it. I pulled it out and turned around to be met with Harry’s smirking face.

“Oh, hello.” I said.

“Miss me?” He asked.

“A little.” I teased.

“Just a little? We’re going to have to work on that.” He winked, pulling me close to him and kissing me.

I returned it, dropping the charger in my hand and putting my arms around his neck. He deepened the kiss and walked me back until I hit the bed, falling over on it. He wasted no time in sticking his hand up my shirt.

“Harry, we can’t. Louis is here.” I whispered.

“It’s fine, he won’t know.” He kissed me again.

I let it go and kissed back, pulling him down onto me. He sucked on my bottom lip while he massaged my breasts. I whimpered at his touch and he began slowly grinding into me. I moaned softly and he started work on a love bite in the crook of my neck. I reached down and found the hem of his shirt, pulling it up. He stopped for a second to take it off, throwing it to the side. I put my hands on his chest and slowly trailed down his stomach and around to his back, gripping the top of his shoulders as he moved his hips rhythmically.

“Harry.” I mumbled.

He ignored me, thinking I was just in the moment.

“Harry, you’re going to give yourself a boner.” I giggled.

He stopped and looked at me, eyebrows furrowed. “And? Then I’m going to fix it.” He smirked, continuing to rub himself against me.

I shut my eyes as I was starting to become sensitive myself. I started giving involuntary whimpers and he started to groan as he sucked at my collarbone. I felt him getting harder against my thigh and I could feel the heat rising to my cheeks. He slowed down until he came to a stop and looked down at me, a smirk on his face. He gave me a long, sweet kiss and got up.

“I’ll be right back.” He said, leaving the room.

I took a deep breath and sighed, rubbing my forehead. I was flustered from all of that so I just laid there for a few seconds.

After I got up, I checked myself in the mirror and fixed my hair. I walked over to the other side of the bed and found my charger on the floor. I picked it up and walked back out to the living room where Louis was still sat quietly on the couch.

I didn’t say a thing when I sat down next to him.

“Where’s Harry?” He asked. But I could hear the knowing in his voice.

“Uh, I don’t know.” I shrugged, pretending to not know where he was or what he was doing.

Louis looked at me with suspicious eyes, but let it go, turning back to the tv. “He’s probably in the bathroom.” He said. It sounded innocent enough, but I knew Louis well enough to know that was him telling me he knew.

I blushed and dropped my head. “Um, yeah. Probably.” I shrugged it off.

He looked over at me again for a short while before looking up as something else caught his attention.

I looked over to see what it was, only to see Harry walking into the room, putting his shirt on. I had to keep myself from slapping my forehead as I rolled my eyes. He was so stupid sometimes. If there was any doubt left in Louis’ mind, it was gone now.

I gave him a look, but he just smiled back at me, not having any idea. He sat down next to me and I hesitantly looked back to Louis, only to see him staring at me knowingly. He turned back to the television and didn’t say a word.

Well, this is a lot more awkward than I thought it was going to be.

Chapter Text

"Oh come on! Just tell her already!" Niall raised his hand impatiently at my tv screen.

"But he's scared to tell her. What if she doesn't like him back?" I reasoned.

"He needs to be a man! And she's knuckle headed for not realizing that he loves her! It's so obvious! I'm surprised he has to tell her at all!"

I laughed at his logic and shook my head. "Boys." I mumbled.

"Remind me again why we're watching this chick flick?" He raised his brow.

"Because I wanted to watch it and you said you were fine with it, remember?" I laughed.

"Yeah, well that was before I knew that the people in it were incapable of taking a hint." He joked.

I rolled my eyes. "Ni, you're such a boy."

"Aren't I supposed to be?" He looked at me with a funny expression. "And besides, I can think of a million more entertaining things to do than watching this."

I raised my brow at him and smirked. "Like what?"

"Well that depends, darlin'." He answered with a mischievous smirk.

"Depends on what?" I eyed him playfully.

He looked me over and bit his lip. "On what kind of mood you're in."

"Oh?" I couldn't help the smile forming on my face.

He crawled towards me on the couch, holding himself above me. "And what kind of mood are you in, princess?"

I giggled at him and blushed. "I don't know, but I know what kind of mood you're putting me in." I said suggestively.

He smiled devilishly and leaned down, connecting our lips. It started out slow and sweet, but quickly got heated when I tugged at his hair. His hands were all over my body, sliding over every curve while his lips on my neck distracted me. I wrapped my arms around him and shut my eyes at the sensation. He was sucking at the weak spot on my neck. He still remembered where it was. I smiled and practically melted into the couch.

I opened my eyes in confusion as he got up suddenly. I looked at him, waiting for an explanation.

"It's a little crowded here." He said before picking me up and carrying me to my bedroom.

He laid me down on the bed and resumed his work on the spot that was soon to be visible. I moaned and bit my lip, enjoying the treatment he was giving me. He knew what he was doing, and I had missed it. I pushed him over gently and got on top of him, giggling at his excited face. I slowly ran my hands from his shoulders down to his hips. I leaned down painfully slow and kissed him lightly on the neck, just barely grazing his pale skin with my lips. I repeated the process a few times before I heard him groan in annoyance.

"For fuck sake, El. Don't be a tease." He whined needily.

I smiled proudly to myself and kissed his neck properly, sucking on the spot I knew made him go weak. I felt him squirm beneath me and buck his hips up into me, growing more impatient by the second. I bit his shoulder softly, licking the bruised skin slowly. He groaned and raised his hands to my back, pushing my shirt up and lightly trailing upwards, making me shiver. He reached around to the front of it and ripped open the buttons, slowly sliding it off my arms. I gripped his shoulders as soon as my hands were freed and kissed his lips. I was snapped from my trance when I felt the back of my bra pop open. I quickly grabbed the material, holding it to me and looked at Niall with surprise.

"Whoa, boy." I smirked.

He pouted up at me and stuck his bottom lip out. "But, but-"

"No. Not yet. Sorry, you don't have the right to view these goods." I giggled, hooking my bra back.

He sighed and ran his hands through his hair. He looked up at me with wide eyes suddenly. "What time is it?" He asked quickly.

"Um, it's five eighteen." I said, looking at the clock on my night stand.

"Shit!" He jumped up from the bed, resulting in me rolling off quickly and almost right off the bed. "Sorry." He apologized. "I was supposed to meet Liam at the gym twenty minutes ago!" He explained quickly, pulling his shoes back on.

"I didn't know you worked out." I said, tilting my head to the side in thought.

"I don't. Boxing." He corrected.

I nodded slowly and climbed off the bed. "Ah, cool." I said lazily, yawning and grabbing my shirt before walking out into the living room.

What I wasn't expecting, was for someone to be in there.

I looked at him wide eyed and quickly put my shirt on. "Louis? What are you doing here?" I asked with a furrowed brow.

He stared at me with some kind of emotion in his deep blues. He said not a word, only looked across the room at me, eyes slightly narrowed in observation.

Niall came out of my room suddenly. "I'll see you later!" He said in a rushed manner before going to leave. He stopped in his tracks and turned around, giving me a hug and a short kiss. "Later, darlin'." He smiled and winked. "Later, Louis!" He waved quickly before rushing out.

I looked back at Louis, waiting for him say something.

“We were supposed to hang out today, remember?” He said blankly.

I dropped my gaze to the floor, remembering the plans we made at school this morning. “Oh, right.”

It fell silent as an awkward tension hung over us. He clearly wasn’t going to say anything else, so I brought it upon myself to keep it going.

“You still want to, right?” I asked timidly.

“I’m here aren’t I?” He asked.

I bit my lip and nodded my head before slowly walking over and sitting down on the couch.

“I don’t have diseases.” He joked at the amount of space between us.

I always sat right next to Louis. No matter where we were. But I felt so awkward right now, and I wasn’t sure if he was mad at me or not.

I laughed lightly and moved closer to him. He put his arm around me and gave a small smile. “That’s more like it.” He said.

“What do you want to do?” I asked him.

He shrugged his shoulders and stared blankly at the tv as I switched off the movie and back to whatever show was on.

“Do you want to go somewhere?” I asked.

He shrugged his shoulders again, not seeming to care.

I raised my eyebrow at him. “Are you okay?”

He looked at me with an expressionless face. “Yeah.” He said dryly.

I doubted it, but let it go. I sighed and looked around.

Louis was being weird. He was never this quiet. I could feel that something wasn’t right about him. I kept eyeing him every now and then, but he just stared blankly at the screen, sighing occasionally.

We must have been sitting in silence for thirty minutes by now, and it was killing me. I couldn’t relax knowing that something was bothering him.

He sighed again and I turned towards him. “Are you mad at me?” I finally asked.

He looked at me for only a second before turning away. “No.”

“Louis.” I dragged out. He still wasn’t looking at me. I turned off the tv and turned so I was facing him. “Louis, talk to me. I know something is wrong.”

He was still unresponsive, just looking at me quietly.

“Louis, are you mad at me?” I asked again, softer this time.

He sighed heavily and rubbed his face. “I’m not mad at you, Eilana.”

“Then what is it?” I pressed.

“I’m just-I-I’m upset.” He got out.

I furrowed my brow. “Why? What upset you?” I asked, moving closer to him and rubbing his arm.

He looked down and shook his head. “Nothing.” He mumbled.

“No, it’s clearly something! Tell me, Lou. I wanna help.” I pouted. I hated seeing him like this.

“I’m afraid you won’t be able to help, love.” He said sadly.

“Is it me? Am I the problem?” I asked quietly, realizing it was all probably my fault.

“You’re not the problem, Eilana.”

“Then what is? Please, tell me what’s upsetting you.”

“I just-It’s-I’m-“ He took a deep breath and closed his eyes for a second before continuing. “You don’t have any idea how upsetting it is to know that you’re always with these other guys and that you like them so much, when it used to be me! That used to be me, and you don’t know how much I miss it! It’s so frustrating to see other guys leaving your house, or sneaking off with you, and it’s all I can think about at night. It’s driving me mad and I don’t know what to do about it because I thought if I told you then it would only make things more confusing and complicated for you, and I really didn’t want to do that, but for fuck sake I can’t take this anymore! I’ve put up with it as long as I could, but I can’t do it anymore! I think I’m going to die of heartbreak if I have to bear this any longer.” He cracked right at the end. I could clearly see that he meant every word. “I can’t-I can’t do this. I’m sorry.”

I just sat in shock for a few seconds. “You-you like me then?” I asked stupidly.

He looked back up at me. “Yes, I do. Very much.”

I felt the grin growing on my face. “I thought you only thought of me as a friend.” I told him.

“No. No, Eilana. I’m sorry to just throw this at you, but I’ve been biting my tongue for so long. I know you probably don’t see me the same way, but I thought you should at least know that I-“

“What? Of course I like you back.” I knitted my brows together in confusion at his assumption. “I always have.”

“Why didn’t you say anything?!” He asked.

“Because I thought there was no way you liked me back! Louis, if I had known that all of this was bothering you, I would have stopped it long ago. I had no idea it was bothering you. I’m sorry.”

“It’s okay. It’s just that I was lying awake at night worrying about one of them hurting you. I couldn’t bear the thought of you getting hurt.”

“What did you think they would do?” I asked, confused.

“I don’t know. Just… throw you to the side, or persuade you to do something you would regret, or upset you in any way. I don’t know, I just don’t like the thought of it. I don’t feel safe leaving you with any other guy.”

I smiled at his worry. “Louis, you’re too sweet. What am I going to do with you, you silly boy.” I shook my head and kissed him on the cheek.

“You didn’t…?” He looked at me with worry.

“No, Lou-Bear. I’m still as pure as ever.” I giggled.

He sighed a sigh of relief and relaxed into the couch. “Thank God.”

There was a comfortable silence.

“So, what happens now?” He asked, looking over to me.

I shrugged. “I don’t know really. I mean, I have another guy to think about now, so I guess I should get it sorted out for good.” I took a deep breath.

“Yeah, sorry again. I didn’t meant to drop the bomb on you like that. Don’t worry about me. Just do what makes you happy, okay?”

“Louis, you’re my very best friend. Your feelings matter a lot to me. I just, really need some time to think things over.”

“How much time?” He asked out of curiosity.

“I think I’m going to just stay home this weekend. Just by myself, just thinking, nothing else. I’m not going to be around you boys, I’m not going out, I’m going to sit in my room and think about things until I’m certain. It’s something I should have done a long time ago.” I told him.

“You mean, I don’t get to see you for a whole weekend?” He pouted.

“I’m afraid so. You boys cloud my mind with your charm and your affection. I need some time away to think clearly. I would give you special treatment, but that wouldn’t be fair. Sorry, Lou-Bear.”

He sighed and pulled me into him. “Okay. I understand, love.” He hugged me.

I smiled at the comforting feeling and hugged back.

He pulled away and smiled at me. “Can I kiss you? Or would that be considered cheating?” He asked cheekily.

I giggled and pretended to think about it. “It doesn’t count until tomorrow.” I said.

“Good. Because I’ve been waiting to kiss you properly for a long time.” He smiled before planting his lips on mine.

I kissed back and immediately got that feeling in my stomach. I forgot about it. The feeling I got when I kissed Louis. It was so exhilarating. A feeling no one else could give me with such a simple kiss.

I wrapped my fingers in his soft hair, wanting more. It had been so long since we had kissed, and I craved more of it immediately. The feeling it gave me was intoxicating, addicting. I didn’t want to stop. I climbed onto his lap, straddling him. He placed his hands on my thighs, pulling me as close to him as possible.

“I missed you so much. I miss being close to you. I miss your touch.” He spoke between kisses.

I smiled against his lips and held his face in my hands. “I missed you too.” I whispered.

He brushed the hair off my neck and kissed all over it softly, making my skin tingle at the light touch. I had forgotten how sweet and gentle he was with me. He made me feel so loved, and I relished in it. He nipped at my skin, licking it soothingly before making his way back up to my lips. He ran his hands down my back and I kissed him with impatience. I sucked at his bottom lip before moving my attention to the spot under his ear. I licked it slowly before biting softly, tasting the sweetness of his skin. He groaned lowly as I sucked, closing his eyes and cursing under his breath.

“You make it really hard to believe that you’re innocent.” He said.

I drew back and looked at him with fake anger. I rolled my eyes and smiled. “Cracking jokes at a time like this, Tomlinson?”

“When do I not crack jokes?” He laughed.

“Exactly. But I love you for it.” I giggled and kissed his lips. “Wanna watch a movie?” I asked.

“That depends. Can I snuggle you and give you kisses?” He asked.

“Of course.” I smiled.

“Just like the good old days.” He grinned to himself.

“I’ll get the drinks and snacks, you find a movie.”

“Okay. I’ll get your favorite snuggling blanket too.” He winked, softly squeezing my ass when I stood up.

I squealed and ran into the kitchen laughing.

~

Here I am, sitting on my bed, about to do something I should have done a long time ago. I don’t know why I didn’t. Although I would be lying if I said I haven’t enjoyed all this attention from the boys, but it’s wrong and I’ve got to stop. I can’t let them control me with my emotions anymore. I never meant for any of this to happen. It’s crazy when I think about it. And I let it get way out of hand. This is madness and it needs to be controlled. It can’t say this way forever.

I sighed and picked up my phone. I sent a mass text to everyone so that they were aware. Louis already knew, but there were some things I wanted him to hear as well. I didn’t exactly want to just drop this on them suddenly. Might as well let them know in advance, as well as keep them away from me.

I just wanted to let everyone know, that I won’t be seeing any of you this weekend. I’ve decided that I need some time alone to think about things. I need to make a final decision. I can’t keep you all on your toes, it’s wrong. I’m sorry in advance for leading you on, it was never my intention. I didn’t want to disappoint any one of you. You all do mean so much to me, and I don’t want this to harm our friendship in any way. I should have thought of that in the beginning, but I’m an idiot. Please excuse my mistakes, as I have made a lot of them. I know it’s a lot to ask, and I don’t expect you all to forgive me for hurting you. My deepest apologies. I love you all dearly, and I hope we can get over this without damaging any of our friendships. See you all Monday. xx

I sighed heavily as I put the phone down. I already felt sick to my stomach with guilt. I should have known this was coming. I’ll have to tell four of them no, and just hope for the best. I really don’t even know what to say, or even who to say it to.

I smacked my forehead and threw myself back on the bed. I groaned in frustration and rolled over, burying my face in my pillow. Maybe if I just go through each one of them individually, as opposed to all at once, I can figure it out.

Let’s see. I’ll start with Zayn. Oh, Zayn. I don’t want to let him down. His life is already such shit and I’m just going to make it even worse if I tell him he’s not the one for me. I want to be there for him, but I don’t know if being there for him romantically is the right way. I mean, I do like him. A lot. Which is surprising considering how he used to treat me, but I really turned out liking him a lot in the end. He’s such a broken soul and I just want to tell him that he can have whatever he wants. I want to tell him he can have all the happiness he wants. He deserves it, and I feel terrible for him because it seems he’ll never truly be happy. It makes me horribly sad to think about. But maybe that’s all it is. Maybe it’s just pity. I hate to say it, but I think that’s all I feel for him. I mean, of course I love him, but only as a friend. I guess I just wanted to make him happy, but I don’t think that I’m really the key to his happiness, and it’s useless for me to try and solve his problems with love that isn’t there.

Liam. Well, Liam means the world to me. He’s invaluable to me. He’s helped me so much. He was always there for me, and he’s never complained about any of it, nor expected anything in return. He’s such a good guy and he’s so sweet to me. I’ve never met another guy so gentle or nice. I know that he loves me a lot too by the way that he worries and cares for me. It’s so cute how much he gets flustered by just a tiny cut on my finger. He always knows just what to say to help me, and he always makes me feel better. There’s not a doubt in my mind that he would do anything for me, and he makes that very clear. I’m just confused as to why he would pick someone like me. He deserves the very best kind of girl, and I’m certainly not it. But I really do like him. I love him immeasurably, I’m just not sure that I’m in love with him. Even if I am, do I really want to take him for myself when there’s surely a better woman out there for him? I don’t know…

And then there’s Harry. Talk about the surprise of my life when I realized I like him that way. Never in a million years did I think that was going to happen. But, it did, and I’ve enjoyed it for the most part. Yes, he hasn’t always been the nicest to me, but he’s improved and I know he works hard at it. I know he really likes me, it’s clear to anyone, but I don’t know if I like him as much as he likes me. I feel guilty for it, but it’s not something I have control over. And judging by how many arguments we’ve had in such a short time, I would say that we weren’t the best match. And we’re not even together. I have to assume that they would only get worse if we ever were to officially become a couple. But then again, a lot of couples bicker and argue all the time. But are they happy? I’m too inexperienced in love to know these kind of things. I do like him a lot though. I’m just afraid that’s it’s more of a physical thing than a personality thing. Of course I like his personality, but on the other hand, it doesn’t seem to mesh too well with mine. At least not all the time. I have to wonder though, would our relationship really go much further? Or would it fizzle out over time? I love Harry as a friend, and I treasure him as much as the others, but I’m not sure just how much I really like him. If I do love him, it’s not coming very clear to me right now. If it’s not love, then why bother?

I don’t even know where to start on Niall. He’s so special to me. I already know what kind of boyfriend he makes, and it’s the best kind. He’s so sweet beyond words, and he’ll do anything to make me happy. Simply seeing his face makes me smile. He always seems to put me in an extra good mood, and it’s hard not to be happy around him. He’s such a sweet guy, and I’m inexplicably sad that he has all of this with his mother to worry about now. He doesn’t deserve it, and neither does she. I want to be there for him as much as possible, and I don’t plan on breaking that promise, but can I really break his heart while he’s in this fragile state? I don’t know if I could forgive myself. I know he loves me. He even told me he does a long time ago, but can he really be so sure? We’re so young after all. I really like him a lot, but I’m starting to think that my crush was just that. Only a crush. Of course I still like him, but I’m going to as long as he gives me attention and sweet words. I’m a girl, and it’s going to play with my head. But how will he take it if I tell him?

And of course, Louis Tomlinson. My best friend, the guy I’ve liked for the longest time, and one of the greatest guys I know of. He’s certainly not your average guy, but that’s what I like about him. He makes me laugh harder, smile brighter, and roll my eyes more than any other guy. But I love it. He was there for me when no one else was. He stuck up for me, no matter who it was that was bullying me, even his own friends got a good threatening from him. He paraded our friendship all around the school, even though it could have ruined his reputation, and when people teased him about it, he would always grab my hand and tell them he was proud to be my friend, because I was a better, more awesome person than all of them. He was always there to cheer me up when I was crying alone. He always made me laugh when I didn’t want to, and he always gave me the longest hug when I needed one. He talked sense into me when I needed it, and made sure I stayed on the right track. He was always there to look out for me. He was the first person besides anyone in my family to care for me as much as they did. I never had to worry that I was alone, because I knew he would be there as soon as I needed him. I don’t know how many times he dropped whatever he was doing, no matter how important, and came running to me. He’s done more for me than anyone else, and I appreciate him more than I can say. He’s perfect and special to me in a way that I don’t even understand fully. I always feel safe with him. I can always count on him for anything, and I know he’ll do it happily with a smile on his face. I don’t ever have to doubt his love for me, but just how much does he love me? Is he in love with me? Am I in love with him? Will it ruin our friendship if it doesn’t work out? Will we get married? Is it worth it? He only said he likes me, he never said he loved me. But how can I know for sure? I don’t want to ask him. I know that’s a lot of pressure for a guy, and it’s a sensitive subject for them. But, am I in love with him? Or is it just a perfect friendship?

I just have to make sure that I pick the right guy. I can’t just keep having do overs. It’s not fair to them. I need to make a final decision and stick to it. But if I screw it up, it’s game over for me. There’s just so much to take into account. They’ve all done sweet things for me, and they all mean so much to me. I don’t want to have to make this decision. What if I do get it wrong?

And worse, what if it turns out to be none of them? Surely not. But, it’s possible.

I sighed and rolled back over. This was making my brain hurt.

Well, I’ve got to make a decision before Monday. I guess I have all of tomorrow to make one. It’s just not going to be easy….

Chapter Text

I stared at the intimidating doors to the school. Right inside are five boys that are waiting to hear from me. And here I am, still not knowing what to say exactly. Yes, I made up my mind, but I just didn't know how to break the news to them. I didn't know how to tell them as nicely as possible. But, today I would have to, whether I was ready or not.

I started taking steps towards the entrance, dreading every word I was going to have to say.

These are the consequences for making the bad choices that I did. I'm so damn stupid. It's going to suck getting out of this. What if one of them decides he doesn't want to be friends anymore? Or worse, what if everything goes back to the way it used to be? No, no. I'm not going to think about that. Ugh. How did I even get myself into this mess?

My thoughts kept me occupied until I realized that I was standing before the doors. I stopped for a second, feeling my stomach turn. I took a deep breath and walked through, making my way down the halls until I reached my locker. None of the boys were in sight right now, letting me relax for the time being. I rummaged through my things until I heard a laid back greeting.

"Morning, love."

I tensed up and stopped what I was doing, slowly shutting my locker and timidly looking up to see his calm blue eyes. I relaxed a bit when I realized he wasn't on the edge of his seat, expecting something from me.

"Morning, Lou." I gave him a faint smile.

He smiled back and hugged me, giving a short kiss on my cheek. "I missed you." He kept his arm around my shoulder.

"I missed you too." I blushed. I still wasn’t used to the fact that he liked me. Everything he said seemed different now. “Where are the others?” I asked.

“Don’t know. I’m sure they’re somewhere around here. Are you ready to give us the news?”

I took a big breath. “Well, no. But it has to be done. I just, don’t know how to say it.” I confessed.

“Don’t worry about it, love. I understand. And I’m sure they will too. It’s your choice in the end, and we’re going to have to accept that, no matter the outcome.” He said, looking a bit sad.

“Even if I didn’t pick you? Would you still feel the same about it then?” I asked.

He looked at me with worry in his eyes, scanning my face for some sign of the truth. “Well, I’m certainly not going to be happy about it, but I want you to be happy, even if it costs me great pain.” He forced a smile.

I sighed and looked down, feeling guilty. “I can’t do this, Lou. What am I going to say? I can’t just…-This is so frustrating!” I almost yelled.

He sighed and pulled me into a hug. “I know, love. That’s why I want it to be over for you already, so you can move on and be fully happy. You can do it, Eilana. We all love you as a friend at the least, we’re not going to be mad, or make you feel bad about this. Think of it this way, it’s like a big relief to us. We’ll finally have it sorted out and we can all start moving on. It’ll be good for everyone.” He tried to make me feel better.

“How can you be so positive when you don’t know if I’ve picked you or not?”

His face fell into a small, sad smile. “Because, you’re still my best friend, and I’m still going to be here for you when you need me, regardless of your decision. I doesn’t matter what the outcome is, I still love you, Eilana, and I’m not going to leave you.” He kissed my forehead and smiled down at me.

I couldn’t help but smile back. “Thanks, Louis. That makes me feel a lot better.”

“So, have you decided how you’re going to go about this thing? Are you going to gather us and knock it out at once, or are you going to do it one by one?” He asked.

“Honestly, I haven’t even thought that far. I’m so unprepared.”

“Well, however you go about it, I’m sure it won’t be half as bad as you think it’s going to be.” He assured.

“I hope you’re right.”

~

I hadn’t spoken to the other boys much throughout the day, other than small talk. We all seemed to be avoiding the subject to my surprise. I thought it would just be me, but it turns out, no one seemed too confident in the results.

When lunch rolled around, it was pretty quiet at the table. The tension was high and the conversation was dead. There wasn’t much eye contact to be made either, along with the fact that no one even dared bring up the reason it was like this.

“I think I’m going to go ahead and get an early start to my next class. I’ll see you guys later.” I said, standing up, trying to pretend that all eyes weren’t on me.

“See ya.” Louis responded, giving me a sympathetic smile.

I returned it and left the room, quickly making it to the restroom and breaking down in front of the mirror. Thankfully I was the only one in there, because I was sobbing out loud.

I’m not even sure why I was crying, but I was just scared. I didn’t want to have to do this. I was scared of the aftermath, no matter what Louis says. I felt so much pressure on my shoulders. I know they were all waiting anxiously for my words, even though they wouldn’t dare bring it up first. They were just as scared as I was. I could see it in the way they looked at me. We were all afraid of the words that hadn’t been said yet.

I finally pulled myself together and wiped my tears, trying to fix the remaining bit of makeup left on my face. I looked at myself in the mirror and put on a casual face.

I just have to make it through the rest of the day here. I can do that.

~

I kicked off my shoes and slid down the back of the door. I was finally home, and not once did I have to say anything about this horrid situation to the other boys. Of course, I knew they would come looking for answers sooner or later. And I can’t just hide away forever. I keep chickening out and I have to quit at some point. I’ve already let this go on for too long.

I walked to the kitchen and grabbed a soda before sitting on the counter, staring lazily at the floor as the thoughts swam around my head.

What a mess you’ve created, Eilana. What a mess.

A faint knock on the door pulled me from my thoughts. I hopped off the counter and slowly walked to answer it, knowing it was one of the boys. I breathed deeply before opening it.

“Zayn.” I said as he stood there, looking impatient and timid. “Come in.” I invited.

He stepped inside without a word. I shut the door behind him and turned around, waiting for him to say something.

“So what’s up?” I asked finally.

“I just wanted to see you. I haven’t seen you in a few days.” He said, stepping closer.

I said nothing as he advanced towards me. I was searching my head for the right thing to say, or how to start, but I couldn’t think fast enough, and nothing sounded right.

I was so involved in my thoughts, I was taken by surprise when he kissed me. I didn’t know how to react. It was so sudden and I wasn’t expecting it. I was growing more flustered and I needed to tell him but I couldn’t figure out how.

He stopped suddenly and looked at me with studying eyes. “Eilana, you don’t really like me, do you?” He asked, clearly already aware of the answer.

“What?” I asked, still confused and running through my head.

“Eilana, I can tell you don’t. I can feel it, the tension that builds when I kiss you. You feel like you have to convince me that you do like me, but I know better. I know you, you’re just trying to make me feel better. You want me to feel wanted, and so you try to convince yourself that you do want me, but really, you don’t.” He said calmly.

“…Zay-“

“And that’s my fault. I made you feel like you had to want me or else I would disappear. I’m sorry, El. I didn’t want to cause you all this stress. I had no idea what I was doing at that point. I was being greedy. I was only fooling myself, thinking that you would really come to love me. I know you don’t, and you never will. I understand, and it’s okay. I don’t think we were meant to be. I was just lonely, and I needed someone. I forced you into feeling like my happiness was dependent on you, and that was very greedy of me. I was just trying to do everything in my power to have you, but I should have left you alone, I should have left you out of all of this.” He sighed, rubbing his forehead.

“Zayn…” I didn’t even know what to say. He was… right. What do I say to something like this?

“I’m sorry, El. The minute I got that text from you, I knew that was it. There wasn’t a doubt in my mind that I was wrong for you. I knew it this whole time, I just tried to hold onto it for as long as I could, because truthfully, you do make me happy. You do help me, El. You helped me a lot. Thank you for that. You don’t know what good it’s done me to be able to talk to someone about all of this. It’s helped me cope with things and I think I’m going to be okay for now. I can’t say how much I appreciate you doing all that you’ve done for me, especially after I treated you the way I did in the past. I never would have seen it coming, but our friendship has really grown to be very special to me. And, quite honestly, I do love you. I love you very much, Eilana. Just not the way I thought I might. I hope this doesn’t affect our friendship, because to me, it’s a very big part of my life now, and I would really enjoy still having you to talk to occasionally and to joke around with. You’re a very special girl to me, Eilana, and I would be upset to have to say goodbye to you.”

I was speechless. He basically just poured his heart out on the floor, and I had no idea how to respond. I was relieved that he understood, but at the same time, I was confused by how simple this all seemed to be.

“Zayn, I’m so happy that you understand. Thank god! I thought you weren’t going to take it well. That went nothing like I thought it would. I predicted that I would be the one doing all the talking.” I laughed nervously.

“Yeah, sorry. I just had a lot to say. I’ve been thinking about this since that night I got your text, but I was just too scared to tell you until now.” He rubbed the back of his neck.

“Wow. Well, honestly Zayn, I love you a lot too. If someone would have told me last year that things would end up this way between us, I would have called them crazy. But, I’m really happy that we’re so close. I don’t want to say goodbye to you either, Zayn. I hope we can continue this friendship for a long time. You mean just as much to me as the other guys, and I don’t ever want you to think any different. Just because I wasn’t the one, doesn’t mean there isn’t one.” I told him.

He smiled at my words. “Thank you.” He said.

“For what?” I asked. I was confused, what had I done?

“For giving me a chance, even though I didn’t deserve one. You had faith in me, you could see the light when even I couldn’t. You’re a much better person than you think you are, El. You don’t give yourself enough credit. Just like me, you only see the worst parts of yourself. We all do. When we’re all so busy worrying about how terrible we are, our friends are always looking at us, thinking about what a remarkable person we are. We just never seem to see it, and so we never realize it ourselves. But you’ve helped me see that there’s good even in someone like me, you helped me find myself, thank you. I can never repay you for the way you changed my life.”

As I listened to him quietly, with a look of amazement on my face, I found myself wiping away the tear that I hadn’t even noticed had fallen.

That’s when he pulled me into a tight hug. I could feel all of his emotion. In that minute, I understood what I meant to him. I never would have imagined I meant that much to anyone, let alone Zayn of all people.

“I had no idea, Zayn.” I whispered.

“I love you, Eilana. I wish you all the happiness with whoever you chose. I don’t know who the lucky guy is, but I’m happy for the both of you already.” He kissed me on the cheek and let me go.

“Thank you.” I smiled, teary eyed.

“I’ll see you around, yeah?” He asked with a bright smile.

I nodded my head quickly, a big smile on my face as well. “Definitely.”

His smiled grew before he turned and walked to the door, giving me one last look before vanishing through my door.

I sighed heavily after that, feeling a good part of the weight drop off of me. Maybe Louis was right, maybe this won’t all be as hard as I thought.

But who should I tell next? …I guess I should go ahead and go for the easiest ones first.

I found my shoes and put them on. I grabbed my coat and shrugged it on before heading out the door, making my way to his house.

This one should be interesting…

~

I rang the doorbell and waited patiently.

“Ah, Miss Stockridge. Come in. Master Harry is up in his room. Although he appears to be a bit upset about something.” He informed me, taking my coat.

“Thank you, William.” I gave him a smile before heading to Harry’s room.

I knocked on the door, but heard nothing on the other side. I knocked again and heard a familiar voice.

“Who is it?”

“It’s me, Harry.” I said softly.

I heard his footsteps getting closer until they stopped. The door opened and there stood Harry, looking completely exhausted.

“Come to tell me, yeah?” He asked.

“Harry are you okay? You look really tired.”

“I’m fine.” He said, opening the door wider for me.

I stepped in and he shut the door. “So, what’s the verdict?” He asked, not looking too excited.

“Well…” I didn’t know how to start at all.

“Well what?” He asked calmly. “Eilana, this is killing me. Just tell me already.” He begged.

“Harry, I… I don’t think we’re right for each other.” I said plainly, not knowing what else to say at the moment.

He stared at me blankly, as if something wasn’t connecting. “So, it’s not me?” He said, shaking his head slightly as his face turned into a small frown of realization.

“I’m afraid not, Harry.” I gave him a sympathetic look. “I’m sorry.” I said quietly.

He slowly began to nod his head. He took in a big breath and bit his lip. “It’s okay. It’s okay, El. It’s not your fault. You can’t choose who you love.” He said, looking up at me.

“I know, but I feel terrible, Harry. I don’t want you to feel bad.” I told him, frowning myself.

“No, it’s okay. I get it, El. Don’t worry about it. I had a feeling it wasn’t me, anyway. I thought I was prepared for this. But… I guess not.” He laughed dryly.

All I could do was look at him sadly. I didn’t know what to do or say to make it better for him.

“It’s better this way.” He said quietly.

“What?” I looked at him with curiosity.

“It’s better this way.” He spoke up. “Now I know for sure how you feel about me. I won’t have to worry about that anymore at least. And you won’t have to worry about me begging for your attention.” He forced a small smile.

I furrowed my brow at him, only feeling worse as I stared at him.

“I’m sorry for all of this. I just-I thought that maybe you did love me, you just didn’t know it yet. But I was a child to think like that. I am a child. I don’t think I’ll ever grow up when it comes to things like this. I hate it. I’m sorry, El.” He apologized.

“What are you sorry for, Harry?”

“When I was little, my parents left a hole in me. They didn’t give me their attention, no matter how much I begged for it or craved it, I was left by myself. And my whole life, I’ve been trying to fill it with other things. When I found Louis at a young age, I thought that maybe having a best friend would fill it, but there was still something missing. I thought maybe popularity would fill it, but it only made it worse. I was surrounded by people, but none of them actually cared anything about me. Yes, they gave me attention, but they didn’t give me love. So when I found you, I thought surely that I had found the solution, and I tried to force you to love me and give me your attention, but even when I did get it eventually, I was still haunted by the thought that maybe you didn’t really love me after all. I was always jealous of the other guys that got your attention because I thought they didn’t deserve it as much as me. But really, I’m not entitled to anything. I was being a spoiled brat again, a kid. I’m stuck in this circle of constantly trying to find something, someone, anything thing to fill this wound, but nothing seems to help.” He sat on his bed and put his head in his hands.

I was holding back my tears. I had no idea that it was that deep of a problem. I never even thought it could be related to home troubles. Now I felt even worse.

I sat next to him on the bed and put my arm around him, rubbing his shoulder sweetly. “Harry, I’m so sorry. I had no idea it had anything to do with your home life. It never even crossed my mind.” I told him.

He put his hands down and looked to the side at me. “It’s not your fault, El. Don’t feel bad. It’s my own fucked up life. It has nothing to do with you, love.” He sighed and looked back at the floor. “I’m just, trying to figure things out myself, and I know how frustrating it can be, and I feel bad that you have to deal with this. I never meant to make it worse. And I’m sorry, and I just fuck everything up!” He yelled the last part suddenly, clearly frustrated.

It made me jump a bit, but I kept my hold on him. “Harry, it’s okay. It’s not all your fault. Things will get better, okay? Your life won’t always be like this. You have a whole future ahead of you. One day you’ll be very happy. You’ll have your own house, and your own money, and a girl that loves you very much with all her heart, and you’ll be truly happy. You just have to wait. It’ll happen, you’ll see.” I assured him, giving him the best smile I could muster at the moment.

He looked at me with a thoughtful face, scanning over my own for a moment. “I know you’re right, it’s just hard to believe at the moment. I’m not very good at having faith in things, but I know you wouldn’t lie to me, El. Don’t think I’m mad that you didn’t pick me. I’m very upset, yes, but I don’t hold it against you or any of the guys. I understand. And I know it couldn’t be me. I knew it the whole time. I just pushed it to the back of my mind. I avoided it, just like every other problem in my life. I’m sorry to have caused you all of this confusion. I love you a lot, regardless of our relationship status, you’re still my best friend, and that won’t change.” He gave me a very small smile, putting his arm around me.

I gave a smile back and hugged him. “I love you too, Harry. More than you think. Just not like that, unfortunately. But, I really love having you as a friend. You’re a good guy, Harry, and I’m so happy that this didn’t affect our friendship. I would be very upset if I had lost you in all of this craziness. And I’m sorry for leading you on. It seems everyone is apologizing to me, when I should be the one apologizing.” I laughed lightly.

“No, we all had a part in this. It’s all of our faults. But it’s mostly mine. I just kind of threw my feelings at you without ever hearing what you had to say about them. It was very selfish of me. But, don’t worry about it. It’s over now, and there’s no reason to fret about it, or to blame anyone. Let’s just forget about it and be good friends, okay?” He grinned at me.

I smiled back. “Okay.” I hugged him again, kissing him on the cheek.

He smiled at me sweetly and let go of me. He kept staring at me until his smile finally dropped into a more serious expression. He leaned forward slowly and kissed my lips shortly. “I’m willing to move on for you, because that’s what you want, but that doesn’t mean I’m not going to miss us.” He told me quietly, looking into my eyes. He bit his lip and his smile picked back up. He kissed me on the cheek, and as innocent and friendly as it was, it still held so much emotion. “Now I can leave all of this behind me.” He smiled genuinely and poked my cheek.

I laughed lightly and smiled. “Harry, I want you to talk to someone. I mean, you know I’m always here if you need anything, but I want you to talk to someone that could help you. I didn’t realize that your family issues were this bad. I think it would be good for you, at least just to get it all out. Okay? Promise me you’ll try to better your life? You can’t keep living with this. You need to find closure. It’s not healthy.” I told him.

He took a deep breath and nodded his head. “You’re right. I do need to talk to someone.”

“You promise?”

“I promise. I’ll look into it tomorrow, okay?”

“Okay. That makes me feel so much better.” I smiled and gave him a big, tight hug, knocking him over on the bed.

He laughed and hugged me back. “I really do love you, El.”

“I love you too, Harry.”

I stood up and sighed contently. “I’m glad we got that all sorted out.”

“Yeah, me too. It’s a good thing, I guess.” He smiled half-heartedly.

“You going to be okay, Harry?”

He looked up at me and gave me one of his charming, heart-warming smiles. “I’m going to be fine, El.”

“Good.” I smiled. “I’ll see you around, curly. I’ve got some other people to talk to.” I told him.

“Alright. I’ll see you later, love. Good luck.”

“Thanks.” I said before making my way out of his room and down stairs.

“Your things, Miss Stockridge.” William said, holding them out for me.

“Thank you, William. And Harry is all better now, don’t worry.” I winked.

He gave me a very happy smile and a nod of his head. “Thank you, Miss. I was concerned about him.”

“Anytime.” I said before leaving with a wave and a smile.

Now onto the others. Hopefully they’ll only get easier from here…

Chapter Text

I lifted the extravagant door knocker and gave it a few loud knocks. I waited patiently, the nerves slowly coming back to me as the time passed.

"Eilana! So nice to see you again. I was just on my way out to see Maura at the hospital. I assume you're here for Niall?" Bobby asked, his face holding a half hearted smile.

I gave him a polite smile and nodded my head in confirmation.

"He's somewhere in there. Just go on in, I'm sure you'll find him eventually." He chuckled, waving lightly as he continued his way toward his car.

"Thank you." I said, waving back slightly before going in.

I looked around the first floor of the house, not seeing him anywhere. I climbed the stairs and went straight to his bedroom, stopping to knock but then realizing the door was cracked open. It was silent, so I decided to go in quietly, not really sure why I didn't knock after all.

I slowly pushed the door open and stepped softly inside. I furrowed my brow at the sight in front of me.

Niall was laying down on his bedroom floor, straight like a plank of wood, and completely silent, with no sign of movement.

I watched him for a few seconds before growing increasingly frightened at the scene. I walked quickly up to him and bent down, grabbing his shoulder and shaking gently. “Ni?” I asked in slight panic.

I jumped when his head shot up and turned to look at me quickly. “Yes? What are you doing here?” He asked calmly.

I put my hand over my heart and breathed a sigh of relief. “I came here to talk to you. Why are you laying in the middle of your floor?”

He looked around and sat up, rubbing the back of his neck as a small nervous smile appeared on his face. “Uh, I was just thinking.” He said quietly.

“On the middle of your floor?” I gave him a strange look, sitting down next to him.

He said nothing and barely laughed, looking a bit lost at my sudden appearance.

“Right. You always did have your own way of doing things. Anyway, uh, I came here to… well-“

“To tell me, right?” He finished for me.

“…Yeah.” I looked away, suddenly feeling a bit sick.

We sat in silence for a minute, neither of us wanting to say anything. I was mentally slapping myself for not preparing what to say to him beforehand.

“Just make it simple. I can take it. Yes or no? Is it me or not?” He said, looking at me finally.

I sighed, not wanting to have to tell him anything. “But it’s not that simple.” I told him.

“Yes it is. I mean, you either love me that way, or you don’t.” He shrugged.

“No, Niall. I mean, yeah, it is one or the other, but it’s not so easy to say.” I said sadly.

His face dropped slightly before one corner of his mouth turned up ever so slightly in realization. “It’s not me, then.” He stated.

My face grew sadder as I looked at him. “Ni, I’m so sorry.”

He looked down, fidgeting with the bracelet on his wrist. “Don’t be sorry, El. It’s not your decision. You can’t control love. It just happens.” He said.

“I know, but I still feel bad. I just-What with everything going on with your mom right now, this is the last thing I wanted to tell you. I feel terrible! Sick, even. I don’t w-“

“El.” He looked at me with a small smile. “It’s okay. Don’t worry yourself about it. You didn’t really think that I thought it was me, did you? Why do you think I was laying on the floor?” He chuckled lightly, although it sounded sad.

I furrowed my brow and sighed. “You were upset.” I said.

He looked at me with eyes that confirmed my suspicion. I could tell he was holding back emotion. It was still there in his eyes.

“Ni…” I already wanted to cry and barely anything had been said yet. I shifted so that I was closer to him. I grabbed his hand in both of mine and looked at him, like he would always do to me. “Niall, I don’t want you to think that I love you any less. I just love you differently than I thought I did. But I’ve realized something about our relationship, something very important. I realized that you mean more to me than I can explain. You’ve done so much for me, and you’re always there for me. Even when I fucked up, you didn’t blame it on me. You wound up apologizing to me, when you had done nothing wrong. You are so sweet, I can’t even begin to express what a special boy you are. You mean so much to me, and I don’t even know where to begin telling you how much love I have for you. I love to pieces, okay? Tiny miniscule little pieces. I don’t know what I would do without you in my life. Your very presence is enough to make me happy. I can’t say that for anyone else. You are a very special kind of friend to me, and although all I can call you is a friend, you can’t even begin to imagine what meaning that holds to me. Friend really isn’t even a good enough word for our relationship. I sincerely hope that we’ll be friends forever, because I don’t want to live a day without you in my life. You are someone I’ll never forget. I’ll never get tired of you, I’ll never stop thinking you’re hilarious, and I’ll never love you any less. I love you so much it hurts sometimes. Like right now, it’s killing me to see you this way. I wish I didn’t have to put you through this hurt. But I hope you and I can move on as the best of friends still? Because I seriously think I would die if you weren’t a part of my life anymore. I just can’t have it, Ni. I won’t let it happen. I love you too much.” I tackled him in a tight hug as my tears began to fall.

He hugged me back immediately. “El, do you really think I could live without you either? You’re so ridiculous, thinking that I would pass up the best thing that ever happened to me. I love you to pieces too, okay?” He chuckled lightly against my shoulder.

I finally pulled back and looked at him. He saw my face and smiled sweetly, wiping away my tears. He tucked the stray strand of hair behind my ear and lifted my face to look at him.

“What did I tell you about crying, eh?” He asked.

“That you don’t like to see me cry.” I said quietly, sniffling as I began to stop.

“That’s right. It’s a terribly, horribly saddening sight. Seeing you cry is the worst thing that’s happened to me today.” He said.

I looked at him and dried my eyes with my sleeve. “Worse than even hearing the news?”

“Much worse.” He smiled. “I may be very sad about it, but I put up with it because I want you to be happy, El. If you’re not happy, my whole world falls around me. I’m in pieces until you’re smiling again. I don’t ever want to see you cry unless it’s tears of joy, understand?” He rubbed my back sweetly.

I nodded quietly and tried to hold back the tears that were forming at his words. “Niall, how can you be so perfect? It’s sickening.” I joked.

He chuckled and smirked. “Yeah I know. It’s not my fault that I’m so sweet, I can’t help it.” He shrugged, sending me a sly smile.

I giggled and wiped my eyes again. “But seriously, I can’t believe you’re taking this so well. I thought you would be more upset.”

His smile fell a bit. “Don’t think that I’m not horribly upset. I am. But I have to accept it. You figured things out, and that’s great. I’m happy for you. But that doesn’t mean I’m not hurting. I mean, I’ll get over it one day. Maybe…” He mumbled the last word.

“Ni, I know you think you really love me, but we’re so young. Things change, feelings change. I thought I was in love with you for a small while, but it changed. It happens. So don’t be so sure. You’ll get over it, Ni. I know you will.” I kissed him on the cheek and hugged him. “You’re one of the best things that ever happened to me, too. And I’ll always be here for you. Anything you need, I’m your girl, okay?”

He smiled brightly at me. “Thanks, Eilana.”

I hugged him again, just holding him comfortingly. “Everything is going to be okay. I just know it.”

“I love you, El. I’m jealous of the guy that gets you, but I’m happy for him too. He has no idea how lucky he is to have you love him.” He kissed my cheek and stroked it with his thumb lovingly.

“I love you too, Ni.” I smiled at him and pinched his cheek.

“Hey!” He laughed, pulling back from me.

“Sorry. They’re just so cute and rosy.” I giggled.

He laughed too, getting up from the floor. He held his hand out for me. I grabbed it and he pulled me up.

“I’ll be okay. I promise. Like I said, as long as you’re happy, I’m not complaining.” He said, kissing my hand.

“Thanks for being so understanding, Ni. That’s one of the many things I love you so much for.” I smiled.

“Well thanks for… liking my personality.” He chuckled.

I hit him softly on the arm. “Yeah, yeah.” I rolled my eyes.

“I’m going to assume you still have someone to talk to?” He asked.

“Louis and Liam, actually.” I said.

“Ah. I knew it would be one of them.” He smiled. “But they both deserve you.”

“I’m not too excited about it.” I laughed lightly.

“I’m sure it’ll be fine. Neither one will give you a hard time. It won’t be as hard as you think.” He winked, trying to relax my nerves.

“Yeah, that’s what Louis said.” I mumbled.

“See? He said it himself. Nothing to worry about. You can do it, darlin’.” He pulled me into a short hug. “I’ll be seeing you around then.” He smiled.

“Yeah. I’ll see you later.” I said, taking a deep breath before walking out.

Now I just have to tell the them. It won’t be that hard, right? I mean, they’ll understand. Hopefully.

~

I pulled out my phone and texted both of them, not really wanting to have to talk to them beforehand.

Could you come to my house please? I need to talk to you. Thanks. Xx

I set the phone down on the kitchen counter and paced back and forth in the kitchen.

“Okay, how can I say this? How about, I know you’re probably wondering why both of you are here, no wait, maybe, I know this is going to be a little surprising, and it kind of breaks the rules of what I originally told you but, no no no, I can’t start it like that… What about, I-“

I was cut off by a rapid knock on the door. I sucked in a big breath and let it out before calmly walking to the door. I opened it up to both of the boys standing there.

“That was fast.” I said in surprise.

“Well this is important isn’t it?” Louis said.

I stepped aside, letting them in. They both followed me to the living room. I stopped in the middle, turning around to face them.

“Okay. So, I know it seems strange that you two are here together, but it’s for a reason. I already talked to the other boys.” I told them.

They both raised a brow at me, clearly eager to hear what I have to say.

“Well, I… I kind of broke my owns rules with this decision.” I started.

“What do you mean?” Liam asked.

“You know how I said that I was going to pick one of you?”

They both looked at each other and their faces dropped.

“It’s none of us.” Louis said, sounding shocked.

“Not quite.” I said.

Their heads shot up at my words, hopeful looking again.

“I kind of, couldn’t really pick between you two. I’m not sure which it is.” I said nervously, waiting for their reaction.

They looked at each other again.

“It’s a tie.” Louis said.

“Kind of. For now. I thought about it for a long time. All day, as a matter of fact. By the end of the first day I had decided it wasn’t any of the other boys. But I just couldn’t pick between the two of you. I’m so confused. You both seem to be the perfect choice, but it can’t be both of you. I’m going to need some more time to figure this out. I’m sorry. I tried to pick, I really did. Every time I think one of you is the right choice, then I remember something about the other one that makes it confusing again. It’s a circle and I’m going to have to try and find the end of it.” I said, holding my forehead in my hands from frustration.

“It’s okay.” Louis said. “I understand. You have all the time you need, love.” He said, smiling at me.

“Yeah, take your time.” Liam agreed.

“Seriously? You guys aren’t angry with me? You aren’t angry at each other? I was scared that this would affect your friendship.” I said.

They both chuckled.

“No, no. We’re not angry, love. And we’re not angry at each other.” Liam said.

“Yeah. Sure, it’s a close race, but a little competition is healthy, isn’t it, Liam?” Louis said, patting Liam’s shoulder.

“Of course. We’re grown-ups, we can handle this.” He nodded, crossing his arms.

I looked between them and sighed heavily. “You know, if one of you had flipped out and became violent, it would have made this much easier for me.” I joked.

“Perhaps. But I don’t think we’re going to give the other one an advantage, are we?” Liam asked, giving Louis a friendly smile.

“Nope. This is a competition after all.” He replied.

I rolled my eyes. “Great. You guys are going to make this much harder for me, aren’t you?”

“No. Not intentionally. But we are going to fight for you. I am, anyway. I’m not going to let you go so easily.” Louis said.

“Me either, love. Sorry.” Liam shrugged.

Wonderful…

Chapter Text

I sighed boredly as I put up the broom and closed the door. I sat down on the couch and looked around the empty house, relaxing in the silence. My feet weren't the only thing running all day. My thoughts wouldn't shut off. Not for a second. All I could think about were those two boys.

For the last week, both of them have obviously stepped up their game. Not to say that what they were doing before wasn't working, but now they were all over me all the time. They were showering me with more compliments than usual, and being sweeter to me, and making me feel appreciated. Yeah, I knew what they were up to. Hell, they had even told me so it's not like it's some secret anyway.

It certainly wasn't helping my case of confusion at all. First they wanted to help me decide, but now they're trying to make it harder. I know they're not doing it on purpose, but that's just how it turns out unfortunately.

And so now, I'm stuck. Totally, completely stuck between two wonderful, sweet guys. I have no idea where I'm going with this, and I don't have anyone to ask for directions. I might as well be wandering in a desert of emotions. I'll never find my way out. At least that's how it seems.

I slid down into the couch and put my hands over my face, trying to clear my head. It didn't work at all.

I heard my phone buzzing on the wooden coffee table. I looked at it and picked it up after lazily shifting forward in my seat.

Lou-Bear

Hey, love. How are you today? xx

I knitted my brows together at the words on the screen. It was very unusual for Louis to text me about something like that. It was so simple and meaningless. Usually he would just come over to find that kind of stuff out.

I shrugged to myself and typed back.

Uh, I'm fine I guess. I've been better, just a bit worn out today. Why do you ask? xx

I set my phone down as soon as it sent and laid back against the cool leather. I closed my eyes for two seconds before there was a knock at the door. I raised my eyebrow and got up slowly, trudging to the door.

I looked a mess right now. I had been cleaning all day and I was wearing my tight, black sweat pants and a dark blue v-neck t shirt. My hair was up in a messy bun, and I wasn't wearing any makeup. But, as tired as I was at the moment, I didn't care.

I opened the door and saw Louis standing there with a huge smile on his face and a few bags in his hand.

"Hi, I'm Louis. I'm here to lighten someone's mood." He said like he was some kind of business or something.

I giggled and rolled my eyes. "Are you? Well I hope you're the best in the business. My mood has been faltering since this morning." I played along.

“Ah. I think I know just the remedy for that.” He winked.

“You fucking goof.” I laughed and let him in.

“What? I can’t have you being all unhappy.” He said, walking past me and into the kitchen.

“Where are you going?” I asked, following behind him.

I walked into the kitchen and saw him setting things down on the counter. He started pulling things out as I watched in curiosity. He dug out what looked like ice cream sundae ingredients, some of our favorite movies, an ipod, some nerf guns, and silly string.

I looked at him with a cocked up eyebrow and a smirk. “And just what is all of this?” I asked.

He smirked at me. “It’s time for operation make Eilana the happiest girl alive, and it’s a go as of now.” He smiled funnily at me and rested against the counter.

“Uh huh.” I said, my smirk growing into a smile. “Looks like you’ve got all the makings of a lovely day.” I confirmed. “But let’s see just how long you can last against me.” I quickly picked up one of the nerf guns and pointed it at him.

He threw his hands up defensively. “Hey, that’s not fair! You wouldn’t shoot a man who brought you ice cream, would you?”

I wore an evil smile as I fired one shot at him, hitting him directly in the cheek.

“Hey, hey! I don’t do these things to you!” He said, picking up a gun.

“Yes you do!” I argued, running away giggling.

“Come back here! I get a free shot, you naughty little girl!” He called after me.

“Nope! You get zero free shots, sir! I don’t play by your rules and you can’t make me!” I yelled back like a madwoman.

I could hear him coming after me as I ran through the living room and out the back door. I left the door open behind me with no time to close it. I started to circle around the house, looking behind me every now and again. Once I made it to the front of the house, I took cover behind a tree. I waited for him to come around the corner right after me, but there seemed to be a delay. I could have sworn he was closer behind me than that. I waited for a few more seconds before he emerged around the corner, carefully looking about with his gun pointed at his sights the whole time. He looked like he was a police officer.

I held back my giggle at his seriousness and took aim, careful not to give away my position. I hit him in the stomach, making him look directly at me with narrowed eyes and a smirk.

He took aim at me too but I dashed from behind the tree and towards the back yard again. I jumped into some bushes right around the corner and waited patiently again. But this time, he didn’t come. I must have sat there for a good two minutes, but nothing. Not even the sound of his footsteps. I finally came out, cautiously looking around me. I tiptoed around the side of the house, but there was no sign of him. I kept on until I got to the front again, but there was still nothing. I watched a car drive by and turned around suddenly thinking he came around the other way, but nope. I scratched my head and furrowed my brow. I finally just walked out into the yard, confused as to where he could have gone.

Suddenly, I was being pelted with the foam darts. I couldn’t even tell where they were coming from. I looked all around until I realized they were coming from up in a tree. I dive rolled behind another tree quickly and looked up at him with narrowed eyes as he laughed at me maniacally.

“You think you’re so clever, don’t you? Hiding in a tree. Yeah, real original there, Lou!” I taunted.

“Does it matter if it’s original or not? It fooled you didn’t it?” His laughter got louder.

“Oh, hah hah. Oh look, I’m Louis Tomlinson and I have jokes!” I imitated in a horrible British accent.

He heard me and started laughing again. “Your accent really is terrible, love!” He called back.

I rolled my eyes and giggled.

“You’re going to have to come out some time!” He said.

“And you’re going to have to climb down sometime. And when you do, I’m going to light your ass up!” I said.

“Are you now?”

“Don’t doubt it, thunder thighs!”

I heard him shriek. “I do not have fat thighs! I’m just shaped that way…” He defended.

“Louis, shut up! I don’t really think that, you moron! I was just teasing you!” I said, laughing.

“Well, it was mean! You’re so mean to me!” He said.

I giggled at his joking and slowly looked around the tree, aiming at him. He was looking somewhere else, smiling no less. He was just trying to make me feel bad, the little devil. I aimed right at his head and started to unleash fire at him. He quickly caught on and started firing back. After a few seconds, I was out of ammo.

“Shit! I’m out of ammo!” I told him, retreating back behind the tree.

“And? Whose fault is that, love? Maybe if you weren’t shooting at me so much you wouldn’t be out.” He said, sounding like a smartass.

“Louis, that’s the point of the game, you donut!” I shouted.

“Been taking insult lessons from Liam, have we?” He laughed.

I laughed at myself too, before getting up and running across the yard. Louis spotted me quickly and opened fire at me, hitting me quite a few times before I made it back to the back yard. I knew he was climbing down out of the tree by the time I made it to the door again. I went inside and closed the door, running over to the kitchen counter and grabbing another gun.

I hid behind the island just as I saw him come up to the door. He slammed the door open and looked around before spotting me again. A giant smirk came over his face and he ran over to the island, picking up two cans of silly string and popping the tops off before coming around at me and covering me in it. I giggled as I set the gun down and picked up my own two cans. We were both laughing and covering each other in a mess of colors. He ran out before I did, but that didn’t make me stop. He dropped the empty cans and put his hands up, trying to block some of it.

“I give up! I surrender!” He yelled, laughing in between words.

“No!” I yelled back. “There is no mercy here!” I giggled.

He came right at me, encasing me in his arms. It knocked the cans right out of my hands as he tackled me, pinning me to the refrigerator.

“When I say I give up, that means hold your fire.” He said, winking at me.

“And I said, no mercy. When I talk, you listen.” I said, smiling mischievously.

He raised a brow at me. “Oh really? Well then, when I do this, you kiss me.” He said, pulling me tightly against him.

I smiled and kissed him. But only a short peck on the lips. “There.” I said, giggling as I peeled some of the neon colored string from his hair and clothes.

“That wasn’t a kiss!” He said, pouting.

“Technically, it was. You never said anything about rules.” I smirked, knowing I was driving him mad.

I got all of the sticky string out of my hair and was working on my clothes when Louis grabbed my face and kissed me deeply. He ran his tongue over my bottom lip and he gently squeezed my ass. He pulled away with a smug look on his face.

“That’s a kiss, love.” He then kissed the tip of my nose and let me go.

I laughed as he pulled his body away from mine, watching all the silly string hang between us. He laughed too and pulled it all off, balling it up and throwing it away.

“I really need to get a shower.” I stated, looking myself over.

“Why? You smell clean, you look clean, I’m pretty sure you’re clean.” He inspected, going back to the stuff on the counter.

“But I was cleaning all day.” I told him.

“So? If you get in the shower, I’m going to get in with you.” He winked.

I blushed and hit him on the arm. “You will not!” I said loudly. “And what is with you and winking so damn much lately? Don’t do that!” I said.

He smirked at me. “Why? Because it makes you blush?” He questioned.

“No.” I said calmly.

He winked at me and I blushed again.

“Stop!” I whined, giggling.

“See? Besides, you look beautiful when you blush.” He said nonchalantly, looking through the bags.

I smiled at him sweetly, actually feeling kind of pretty for the first time in a long time. “Thanks.” I said quietly.

“Well it’s just true, love.” He smiled back, hugging me to him with one arm and kissing me on the temple.

“What do you say we watch a good movie and then go get some dinner?” He suggested.

“That sounds good.” I agreed, feeling all smiley and happy suddenly.

He had actually done it. He improved my mood vastly. Not that I ever doubted he would.

~

We were laid out on the couch, our legs tangled together as our heads were at opposing ends. The credits were rolling and I looked over at him, smiling at his relaxed face. He was so cute.

He saw me smiling at him and he smiled back, showing me his teeth. “Did I fix the problem?” He asked.

“Yes you did.” I grinned.

“Great. I’ll send you a bill.” He joked.

“Hah hah. You smartass.” I laughed.

“You love my ass.” He said cockily.

I sighed in defeat. “I do, yes.”

“Oh no, I know. I was just stating a fact.” He said, smirking.

“Did you, now? And how would you know?”

“Well by the way you stare at it all the time, anyone would guess that you do.”

I blushed bright red and covered my face.

“Oh yeah, I see you doing it.” He teased.

“You do not! I don’t do such things.” I defended, crossing my arms. Even though he was right, I did stare at it all the time.

“You might be innocent, but that doesn’t make you an exception when it comes to being a pervert. I know you are. But hey, who can blame you, right?” He chuckled.

“You’re horrible. I hate you.” I said, making a silly mean face at him.

“If it makes you feel any better, I stare at your ass all the time. It’s quite lovely.” He smirked at me.

My face was burning up now. “Louis Tomlinson! If you make me blush one more time I’m going to punch your mouth!” I threatened jokingly.

“That would be hot.” He joked.

“Ugh! I can’t win with you!” I laughed.

“No, you can’t.” He said proudly.

I sighed and glared at him jokingly. I finally looked away and stared at the clock on the wall absent mindedly.

Louis stared at me quietly for a while. “You’re so beautiful.” He said suddenly.

“Louis, I look like hell right now.” I told him.

“No you don’t. I like it when you look like this. It’s cute when you walk around in sweats and a t shirt. I love it.”

“You know what I think? I think you’re crazy and blind.” I laughed lightly.

“No. You’re still breath taking. Just like you are.” He gazed at me carefully.

I felt my face warm up again and I put my head down, unable to stop the smile that formed on my face.

“I really mean it, Eilana. I could stare at you for the rest of my life.” He said, the mood suddenly very serious.

I glanced at him from the corner of my eye, still smiling at his words. I knew that he meant every word of it. I could always tell when Louis was speaking from his heart.

“Thank you, Lou.” I smiled sweetly at him.

“No need to thank me for speaking the truth, love.” He grinned back.

I tucked some hair behind my ear and sat up. Nothing was said for a minute or so, but the silence was a very pleasant one.

Louis was the first to break it. “Well I’m hungry. I say we get food. Yes?” He asked, sitting up too.

“Yes. I’m hungry too.”

“Good, then let’s go.” He said standing up and grabbing my hand.

“Wait, I can’t just go out like this.” I said, motioning to my attire and lack of makeup.

“I just told you how beautiful you are, and you’re still worried about going out in public like that?” He asked, his brows raised in question.

“Yes.” I said simply.

“I’ll never understand girls.”

I giggled at him. “I have to get ready first.” I told him.

He sighed. “What about take out? That way you don’t have to get ready, and I get to look at your beautiful, clean face.” He suggested.

I smiled at him and squeezed his hand. “I think that’s a good idea.”

~

Another awesome movie and too much food later, we were laying on the couch again. This time, facing each other with my leg over his hip and one of his legs between mine, our arms were wrapped around each other. We gazed at the other in silence, just smiling ever so slightly.

“Louis?” I asked softly.

“Yes, love?” He responded, brushing the fallen strand of hair from my face.

“How long have you liked me?”

He smiled even bigger at the question. “I’ve liked you for a long time. I’m not even sure when exactly it started, but I know that I liked you for a very long time before I even realized it. Possibly when I first met you. I remember thinking you were so beautiful. And you were so shy and sweet. It was adorable.”

I smiled and blushed lightly. “Really? I don’t know why I thought it was more of a recent thing. So, you liked me before anyone else?”

“Yep. I was the first.” He chuckled.

I smiled at the sound of his small laugh. It was so happy.

He pulled me in and kissed me slowly and sweetly. “And I want to be the last. I love you, Eilana.”

I was shocked silent at his words. I could only look at him in wonder. “You… love me?” I asked, not believing what had come out of his mouth.

“I love you. I’m in love with you, and I have been for a long time.” He told me quietly, looking over my face carefully.

My mouth was left agape with nothing to say. I want to tell him that I feel the same, but I’m not sure if that would be the truth.

“You don’t have to say anything. I just thought you should know. I should have told you that a long time ago. I’m sorry.” He said.

“So you mean, that whole time that we were fighting…”

“I still loved you.” He confirmed.

“Even after how I treated you?”

“I still loved you just as much.” He smiled. “There’s nothing you can do to make me love you any less. That, I promise.” He kissed me.

“Louis, I didn’t know felt so strongly about me.”

“Well now you do.” He smiled.

“…So, all those times I said I love you, and you said you loved me too?”

“I might have meant it a little more than you were aware of.” He said, smirking like a little kid.

I giggled and buried my face into his chest, feeling the heat in my cheeks. “I’m so stupid.” I shook my head, smiling like a fool.

“You’re not stupid, you’re just a young girl. They don’t tend to take hints very well.” He chuckled.

~

I pushed my way through all the people standing around in the hall and made it to Niall’s locker successfully.

“Hey, Ni.” I smiled.

He turned around and smiled back, giving me a hug. “Hey, El.”

“How’s your morning going?” I asked. I saw him earlier, but I didn’t get a chance to speak to him.

“Eh, a bit slow. Woke up with a terrible headache this morning.” He said.

“And by headache, you mean hangover, right?” I smirked.

“Maybe.” He smiled playfully.

“I have a solution to that. Don’t drink so much.” I joked.

He turned back around to look at me again. “Did you just tell an Irishman not to drink so much? And besides, easy for you to say, you don’t drink.”

I giggled. “I sure did. And I don’t, you’re right. But you seem to be drinking more than usual lately. Something wrong?” I asked, getting the feeling I already knew.

“Uh, not really. Don’t worry about it.” He smiled weakly.

Lying. I knew it. It’s my fault isn’t it? Oh great. Now I feel horrible. He seemed to be just fine all week though. He was taking the whole thing rather well, I thought. But now this. Ugh.

“Niall, what is it?” I dragged out.

He shut his locker and turned to me once more, draping his long arm around my shoulder. “Don’t worry your pretty little head about it. It’s not worth your time, okay? It’s nothing. Seriously.” He assured me.

I gave him narrow eyes. “Yeah, okay. Whatever. But don’t think I don’t know.” I raised my eyebrow before dropping the conversation.

I let him lead me to the lunch room, chatting about random things.

“Where’s Harry?” I asked when I realized he wasn’t at the table.

“Don’t know. I’m sure he’s just a little late. You know how he’s slow sometimes.” He shrugged.

I sighed and pushed it to the back of my mind, getting my food and sitting down next to Zayn.

“Hey, buddy.” I winked and nudged his arm.

He smiled at me and threw an arm around me. “Hey.”

I was honestly surprised at how well the rest of the boys and I were getting along after all of this. Things between the four of us seemed to return to normal fairly quick.

“Anyone know where Harry is?” I asked, hoping to get a more fulfilling answer from one of them.

“Nope.” They both replied.

“Oh. I haven’t seen him all day.” I mumbled more to myself than to them.

“I’m sure he’s alright. He’ll probably join us any minute.” Liam answered anyway, giving me a small smile.

I sighed again and left it at that. Niall sat down on the other side of me and Louis sat down not a minute later.

“Hey.” He said, sounding out of breath.

“What’s up with you, mate? You sound like you just ran a mile.” Liam asked.

“Just had to run through the halls from one of the teachers.”

“What did you do?” Zayn asked, quirking an eyebrow.

“I might have gotten into a fight.” He said quietly, hoping I wouldn’t hear him.

“Louis Tomlinson!” I raised my voice.

“What? I didn’t get hurt…” He mumbled.

“And why were you throwing punches?” Liam asked.

“Because he was saying some nasty things about Eilana.” He shrugged.

I wanted to be angry, but I found myself smiling. Louis must have caught it because he smiled at me for a short second.

“What did he say?” Niall asked, puffing up suddenly.

“Well I’m not going to repeat it. But basically, he just came up to me and starting going on about her, asking me inappropriate questions about her, and then said something about liking to get his hands on her. So I punched him. Right in his nasty little scumbag mouth.” He shrugged, eating his food.

“Oh. Well he deserved it then. Good job, mate.” Liam said, fist bumping him.

They shared a laugh and I gave them narrowed eyes and a smirk. “Now boys, we don’t celebrate hurting people.” I scolded.

“Well we do.” Louis said.

I shook my head and sighed, putting my head in my hand.

Suddenly I spotted Harry walking up. He put his food down, sitting down next to Louis. “Hey.” He said quickly.

“Hi.” I waved across the table.

He picked his head up and smiled at me. “So what did I miss?” He asked.

“Louis just knocked a guy out for talking nasty about El.” Niall informed, chuckling a bit.

“Really? That’s awesome.” He smirked, nodding at Louis approvingly.

I rolled my eyes at their violent ways and kept eating. Sometimes, there were things that boys and I disagreed on.

~

“So Ni, what are you doing today?” I asked as we walked out of school.

“Nothing.” He replied.

“Wanna hang out? You and I haven’t hung out in too long.” I said.

“Of course. Come on, you can just come with me.” He smiled, throwing his arm around me and leading me to his car.

“What made you want to hang out with me? Wouldn’t you rather hang around Louis or Liam?” He asked as he got in the car.

I gave him a sarcastic face and just stared at him for a while.

“What? Wouldn’t you?” He asked, chuckling to himself.

“No. What makes you think that? This better not be about the fact that I like them like that.”

“It’s not. I just thought maybe…-Nevermind.” He sighed as he pulled out of the lot.

“Ni.” I started.

“No. Forget it. I’m just happy that I get to spend time with you still.” He smiled at me.

I sighed and looked away. “I’m sorry, okay? I didn’t choose for it to be this way.” I said quietly with my head against the window.

“It’s okay, El. I know. We went over this, remember?” He laughed lightly. “It’s alright. Really.” He tried to cheer me up.

Too bad I was already feeling like shit. I hated this. Why couldn’t I just have normal guy friends?

“Come on, El. Don’t be like this. Smile.” He tried, looking between me and the road.

I turned to him with a sour face, smiling momentarily and then frowning again.

“Ah, now don’t be a smartass with me young lady.” He said in his best father voice.

I couldn’t help but giggle a small bit.

“Ah hah! I got it! I got her to laugh!” He said proudly to himself.

“Yes, yes. Congratulations.” I said sarcastically.

“You know, you really don’t make sense. Here you’re upset because you upset me, yet you respond to my trying to cheer you up with sassing me and upsetting me more. You do understand that’s crazy, right?” He tried to hold back his smile.

“Alright, gah. Stop making me feel terrible. I’ll stop. It’s just… I still feel bad, okay?” I huffed.

“I know you do. I’m not sure why though. It’s not like you could change it, so why sulk over it? I’ve accepted it and moved on. Well, I’ve accepted it anyway. But you should too.” He shrugged.

“Niall, why do you have to be so sweet? It makes things worse. If you weren’t so fucking sweet as sugar it wouldn’t have been so upsetting to do this to you.” I whined, crossing my arms.

He laughed and looked over at me. “Yeah, I know. It’s really all my fault when you think about it.” He smirked.

“You’re damn right!” I giggled.

He chuckled and rolled his eyes, shaking his head. “Mine or yours?” He asked.

“Yours! Yours is always more fun.” I said.

“Alright then.”

I turned on some music and danced like a fool, singing at the top of my lungs the whole way there, almost causing Niall to drive off the road from laughing so hard. I would give him a look for laughing at me, but then I would laugh too.

We finally pulled up to his house and I shot out of the car and to the door, only to discover that it was locked.

Niall walked up behind me, smiling and dangling the key between his fingers. “Looking for something?” He asked with a smirk.

He unlocked the door and pushed it open, holding his hand out towards it and waiting for me to enter. I walked in and ran all the way upstairs, almost tripping before making it to his room and closing the door before he got there. I locked it and stood there, hearing his footsteps as he neared the room.

I heard him try to turn the knob, but he realized it was locked. I heard a heavy sigh and pause before his voice came out muffled.

“You better unlock this door right now.” He said sternly.

“Or what?” I asked, holding back a giggle.

“Or I’m going to break it down and tickle you to death.” He said calmly.

“Oh yeah, I’d like to see you try.” I laughed.

“I would advise you to stand back.” He said.

“For what?” I asked, stepping back anyway.

I heard nothing for a few seconds, until a loud boom sounded. I gasped and backed up more.

Then it happened again, this time the door gave way slightly. And again, and again. The door was beginning to move more and more until on the fifth kick, it went flying open. I screamed and ran across the big room, diving past his bed and taking shelter on the floor behind his mattress.

I heard him laugh evilly as he made his way around to me, walking slowly for emphasis. I looked up at him as he stood towering over me, smiling down in a mischievous way.

“Now what was that you said? Something about wanting to see me try it?” He asked, smirking cockily.

“Please don’t! I’m sorry! I believe you now!” I said, trying to get out of this.

“Nothing’s going to save you now, little girl.” He reached down and tried to grab me but I darted past him and out of the room.

“You’ll never get me!” I screamed behind me.

“Is that another challenge?” He yelled back.

I didn’t respond and hid in the hallway closet. After a few seconds, I heard him coming down the hallway, and then I heard him pass right by me. I let out the breath I was holding and stood there, not sure if it was safe to go out or not. I decided I would stay in for now.

I heard him again, but this time he still passed right by. I was so nervous, but I wasn’t sure why. He was just going to tickle me probably, but it still frightened me. I guess it was all the dramatic effect he was putting on it.

I heard him walking again a few minutes later, but this time they didn’t get any quieter, they just stopped. I was waiting for him to open the door any second so I squeezed my eyes shut, but nothing happened. I finally opened my eyes again, but after what had to be two minutes, nothing had happened still. I finally concluded that he had walked off. He had to. There wasn’t any sound of anything. He was probably laying on his bed, laughing to himself because I’m just standing here.

I rolled my eyes at the thought and slowly, quietly turned the doorknob. I opened it up and… nothing. I was standing in here for nothing. I sighed to myself and closed the door, starting my way back to his room. I took one step before someone tackled me to the ground from behind.

I shrieked and turned around to see Niall, of course, on top of me. “Dammit, Ni! You scared the fuck out of me!” I said.

“I was starting to wonder if you’d ever come out!” He laughed.

“I knew it!” I said to myself.

“And now, you’re mine.” He smirked before attacking my sides, throwing me into a fit of laughter.

“Ni! No! Stop!” I tried to get out between laughs, but it was a little hard to understand as I couldn’t complete my words.

He continued to tickle me until I was laughing so hard that there was no sound, just my shaking body. I started to panic just before he stopped. I tried to catch my breath desperately. My sides hurt from all the laughing and he acted like he was going to get off, but then he quickly tickled me for a second. He stopped for a few seconds, and then tickled me for a few seconds. He finally got up and looked down at me.

“You gonna lock me out of my room again?” He asked.

“No!” I said quickly.

“Good.” He said with a smile before walking off towards him room.

I laid there and just breathed for a minute. After my breathing returned to normal, I got up and walked to his room, where he was laying on his bed, looking at something on his phone.

“What’re you doing?” I asked as I sat beside him.

“Replying to Liam.” He said.

“About what?”

“He was asking if I knew where you were.”

“What did you tell him?” I asked.

“That you were with me, what else?” He chuckled.

“Why would he ask that?”

“Because he’s worried about you.” He told me.

“Why would he be worried though?” I asked again.

“Because he didn’t know where you went. You disappeared from school he said. He was worried you got kidnapped or something.” He explained, chuckling at the idea.

“He sure is dramatic, isn’t he?”

“That’s Liam for you.” He shrugged.

I giggled at the thought of him pacing the floor when I was just over here with Niall, safe and sound.

“Wanna play Persona 4 Arena?” I asked with a smile.

“Of course.” He smiled right back. “But I’m going to beat you.” He wiggled his eyebrows.

“We’ll see about that.”

~

I watched Liam twiddle with his pencil as he chewed on his lip at the desk to my side. He was leaning back and listening to the teacher intently. I laughed inwardly to myself. He really was kind of a nerd. But it was cute. I liked that about Liam. He wasn’t someone you would pin as the smart type, mostly because he hung around Harry and the boys, who clearly weren’t into education. But Liam really tried his hardest, and I know most of it was only to impress his parents, but I was glad he did it anyway. He was the only boy in class that seemed to be paying attention.

After a few minutes of watching him like some kind of creep, he turned to me and saw me staring at him. A smile quickly made its way onto his face as he stared back. I smiled at him and looked away quickly. He eventually turned his attention back towards the teacher, and I looked at him through the corner of my eyes. He had a sly smile on his face. Then I realized upon closer inspection, he was looking at me from the corner of his eyes too. I blushed and looked back at the board, pretending that it wasn’t a big deal.

I felt my phone buzz a minute later and dug it out, only to see that it was from him.

Teddy

Are you checking me out? ;) xx

I blushed even harder and put the phone down, trying to ignore it. It didn’t work, and after a while I finally picked it up and typed back.

Maybe. ;) xx

I smiled to myself and put it down. I glanced at him and saw that he was grinning toothily at his phone. He typed something else and put it down, raising his eyebrow at me.

I felt my phone buzz in my lap again. I made sure the teacher wasn’t looking and picked it up.

Teddy

You naughty girl. If you want to see more, you only need ask. xx

I could tell my face was bright red by the time I was done reading it. I put it down quickly and glanced at him, seeing him smirking at me deviously. I decided not to say anything back or even look at him for the rest of the class. I was getting very hot and I hoped no one would notice my sudden fidgeting in my seat.

Once class let out, I got up, knowing that Liam would catch me anyway, and just waited for him. Sure enough, he came up to me. With a sly smirk upon his face of course.

“Having naughty thoughts, are we?” He asked just loud enough for me to hear.

My cheeks went pink and I put my head down, gathering my stuff. “No. You’re just imagining things.” I lied calmly.

“Oh really? Nothing at all? You were just thinking about normal things and that’s why you kept shifting in your seat? Not because maybe, you were thinking things you shouldn’t be thinking in public?” He asked, already knowing the answer.

“Absolutely not.” I lied again.

“Really?” He questioned, placing his hand dangerously low on my back.

I stiffened against his touch, stopping what I was doing immediately.

“That’s what I thought.” He smirked before walking out.

I picked up my stuff and ran after him. “Wait!” I caught up to him, grabbing his shoulder.

“Mhm?” He turned around.

“Um, do you have plans?” I asked sheepishly.

His smiled grew at my question, catching on to what I was asking. “No. Would you like to come over?” He asked.

“…Yeah.” I said quietly, mentally slapping myself for giving into him. He just really knew how to get under my skin.

~

“Where is everyone?” I asked as we pulled into the five car garage only to see that it was empty.

“They’re just out doing their own thing.” He replied casually.

“Oh.” I said, barely audible.

“Come on.” He said, pulling me out of the car.

As soon as we got into the house, he headed straight for his room, and I followed closely behind him.

When we got up there, he shut the door and started putting his stuff away. I was waiting for him to ravish me, but it didn’t happen. He walked over to his bed and sat down, sighing before pulling out his phone.

I stood in the middle of his room, looking at him in confusion.

Did he not invite me over here to mess about?

I tried clearing my throat, but all he did was look at me and furrow his brow, asking why I was standing over here. I huffed to myself and crossed my arms as he went back to the device in his hand.

I walked over and sat next to him. “Liam?” I asked.

“Yeah?” He asked, still not looking away from that thing. I was getting very annoyed at the little gadget suddenly.

I stared at him for a few seconds, realizing he wasn’t even paying me any attention. I finally grabbed his phone and threw it behind him on the bed. He looked at me with confusion, not understanding why I did that suddenly. I climbed onto his lap and straddled him, watching as his face started to change into one of excitement. He bit his lip and looked up at me. I put my arms around his neck and gave him my most innocent look.

“What do you think you’re up to?” He smirked, finally giving me the attention I craved.

“What does it look like?” I purred in his ear.

He let out a tiny groan. “Like fun.” His eyes lit up with something. Lust.

I smirked and licked my lips.

“You just want me to attack you, don’t you?” He asked.

I smiled wildly and ran my hands down his back, getting closer to his face. “Why? Am I getting to you, Mr. Payne?” I asked as sexily as I could.

“You have no idea what you do to me.” He said, grabbing my thighs in his big hands.

“What do I do to you?” I asked innocently.

“You make me crazy. I have a hard time controlling myself around you. You know that.”

“I don’t actually.” I giggled.

“I just want to rip these clothes off of you, but you’re so innocent. You don’t understand how difficult it is for me to hold back. Especially when you act this way towards me. You’re not making it any easier.” He growled.

“That’s the idea.” I winked.

That was it. He snapped. He pulled me forward and kissed me with so much feeling. It was overwhelming. I kissed back, although I found it a bit hard to keep up with him at first, I managed to get the hang of it. He kissed me as though he couldn’t get enough. He was hungry for me, and that turned me on. I was already hot from the way he was grabbing me. He was squeezing my thighs softly before he grabbed them and pulled me closer to him until there wasn’t an inch of space between us. He moved his hands back around to my ass, grabbing it firmly as he began work on my neck. I tilted my head to the side, giving him easier access to the hot skin. He kissed his way down, trailing his fingertips under my shirt and up my back. My head rolled back as his teeth grazed my skin, making it more sensitive as he sucked at it. A chill ran all the way through my body when he slowly licked up my neck. I moaned softly at the feeling of his wet tongue on my skin.

“I want you so much. I wanna touch you, taste you, hear you say my name.” His low voice filled my ears.

Finally coming back to my senses, I put my hands on his shoulders and pushed him back onto the bed. He looked up at me with surprise as I leaned over him on my hands and knees.

“I thought you said you wanted to take things slow this time around?” I reminded him, a playful smirk on my lips.

“Fuck what I said.” He grumbled, trying to pull me towards him.

I stopped him, wagging my finger in his face, telling him to wait. I sat on his hips and let my hands run down his shirt.

“This has to go.” I said, looking at him with a raised eyebrow. “Take it off.” I demanded.

He smirked and sat up just long enough to pull it off. I took in his bare skin with wandering eyes. I looked him up and down, letting my hands trail down his abs slowly. He was so sexy, and I couldn’t stop looking. I caught his eye and realized he was smirking at me, clearly enjoying the attention. I leaned down and kissed all along his jaw line, admiring just how much of a man he really was. I was getting hotter just thinking about him and what he could do to me. I bit softly at the skin on his neck, earning a low moan from him. I sucked at it and teasingly nipped at it before leaving a mark on him. I smiled to myself and kissed him on the lips. He kissed back needily, becoming a little more aggressive as time went on. I began to roll my hips against his, hearing another groan fall from his lips. I slowly ground into him, knowing that I was going just slow enough to drive him crazy. It didn’t take him very long to grab my hips and start grinding up against me. I whimpered at the pressure he was putting between my legs. I could feel him getting harder against my thigh and I blushed at the thought that I was doing that to him.

“Dammit, El.” He growled as I rubbed against him.

I trailed my fingertips up his stomach, past his chest and took hold of his bare shoulders. His skin was burning up and his breathing was becoming heavier. I noticed that the friction was getting to me too as soft sounds of pleasure began to leave my mouth. I bit my lip and looked Liam in the eyes, blushing slightly. I could hardly believe I was doing this right now. He took my face in his hands and pulled me down, kissing me hotly. My mind started to wander and I started to panic a bit. I broke the kiss and looked at him with a sorry expression. He only looked at me in confusion.

“Liam, I can’t give you what you want. I’m sorry.” I told him.

His wondering face turned into a sweet smile. “El, you didn’t really think I was expecting anything from you, did you?”

“Well, that’s what we’re doing, isn’t it?” I asked sheepishly.

“No, no, love. I would never pressure you into that. And you’re not mine to have, anyway. I couldn’t do that to you.” He looked at me sadly, finding my hands and lacing his fingers with mine.

“But, it was wrong of me to lead you on like this. I knew I couldn’t give you that. And now it’s awfully mean of me to have given you… well, that.” I said shyly.

“What? An erection?” He chuckled at me. “Let’s just say it’s not the first time you’re responsible for it.” He smirked.

I could practically see the color of my face. I must have resembled a tomato right now. “Liam!” I smacked his arm.

He laughed and grabbed my hand again, kissing it. “One day, you’re going to have to acknowledge that boys have dicks.” He raised an eyebrow at me, that mocking smirk on his face.

“Stop!” I whined. “And what are you going to do about your… problem?”

“Don’t worry about it.” He said calmly, as if we weren’t talking about his dick of all things.

“Don’t you need to…?”

He laughed at me again. “It’ll go away after some time.” He smiled at me. “You really are totally innocent, aren’t you? You really know nothing.” He teased.

“Well I’m sorry I’m not a whore!” I joked.

“No, no. Don’t be a whore, love. I love you just the way you are. I wouldn’t want you any other way.” He pulled me down and kissed my forehead.

I smiled at him before rolling off of him and laying down. He pulled me to him with one arm, hugging me tight to his side. I snuggled up to him, taking in his scent.

“Liam?” I asked so quietly it came out as almost a squeak.

He looked over and down at me, waiting for my words.

“Did you not invite me over here to mess around?” I asked timidly.

His brows knitted together as his forehead wrinkled. “What?” He laughed. “No, love. Why would you think that? I would never use you that way. I am offended.” He said, feigning hurt.

I giggled at him, but couldn’t help but smile at his promise. “Oh.” I responded.

“Is that what you really thought?” He asked seriously.

“Well, yeah.” I confessed.

“I am appalled, young lady. I can’t believe you would even consider thinking that for one moment I think of you as an object. Sure, you’re sexy. I like kissing you, and touching you.” He wiggled his eyebrows. “But, you know what I love even more?”

“What?” I asked, my face lighting up at excitement at what his answer was going to be.

“Cuddling with you.” He smiled.

My smile of excitement turned into one of complete adoration.

“I’m most happy when I just get to stare at you and listen to you tell me about your day.” His mouth was turned up ever so slightly at the corners.

Just when I thought it might be Louis, then he comes in and changes my mind again. Now I’m really not sure.

I tuned back into reality to hear his soft breathing through the quiet room. We just lay there for a long time. I listened to his heartbeat, realizing that it was going just slightly faster than normal. I smiled to myself but kept quiet.

After some time, I thought he might be asleep. I turned to look up at him, only to see that he was gazing at me the whole time. He gave me a bit of a questioning look as I stared at him.

I situated myself so that I was laying on my stomach, and put my chin and arms on his stomach, looking up at him.

“Liam?” I asked slowly.

“Yes, love?”

“I know how bad the relationship between you and your family is.” I started, seeing him slowly drag in a deep breath. “But, I want to help. You’ve helped me so much, and I want to help you now.” I told him.

“How can you fix something that was broken to begin with?” He asked me, eyes staring at me with amusement, as if I were an interesting child.

“I don’t know. But I do know that I’m going to find a way. You deserve a better life. The way you’re treated is complete bullshit, and I’m not going to stand for it anymore.” I said.

He chuckled dryly at my determined spirit. “You’re more than welcome to try, but don’t go getting upset when it doesn’t unfold like you thought it would. My parents and I, we’re just pieces from a different puzzle. We weren’t ever meant to fit together, and no matter how hard you try, we’re never going to. It’s a lost cause, El.” He warned calmly.

“You don’t know that.” I shook my head softly.

“You think I haven’t tried? You think that every day for sixteen years of my life I didn’t try to fix it? I wasted too much of my life caring about something that was hopeless. That’s why last year I finally gave up. I finally realized that it was useless and moronic to try. I moved on and I’m not going to let it affect me anymore.” He said, trying to sound strong.

My face fell into sadness at the picture before me. A broken, sad Liam, trying his very hardest not to fall apart again.

“But it does affect you Liam. It always will. Unless you fix it.” I tried to convince him to see it clearly. “Liam, you can pretend that it doesn’t bother you all you want, but one day you’re going to get tired of pretending. You have to face this. It’s not going to go away if you ignore it.”

He looked back at me, straight in the eyes. His gaze pierced right through me. It was so strong and upsetting.

“I don’t want you to worry about me, El. You have enough of your own problems to deal with.”

“Please, Liam. Let me help you. Let me do this one thing.” I grabbed his hand, squeezing it firmly in my own. “Please.”

His eyes lingered on me, silently showing all of his inner thoughts as he contemplated it. He finally sighed and bit his lip. He gave me a look that told me I was free to do what I wanted.

I smiled and hugged him tightly, kissing his cheek. “I promise I’m going to make this life a better one for you. You deserve it, Liam.”

“I don’t deserve a thing.” He mumbled.

“Don’t say that.” I looked at him, upset at his saddened tone. “Don’t ever say that.”

He sighed and kissed me on the lips sweetly. “You’re the only one that sees me the way you do.”

I smiled at him, studying his deep brown eyes. “I see the real you. That’s all.” I kissed his cheek.

He gazed at me, adoration in his eyes. “Thank you.” He whispered, a tiny smile lingering at the corners of his lips.

I’m going to fix this. I’m going to fix it for him. He needs help and I’m going to be there for him. No matter how long it takes…

~

“Lou!” I squeaked, trying to swat his hand away from my ass. “Not in public! Have a modicum of decency!” I giggled.

He chuckled and threw an arm around me as we walked through the mall. “I have plenty of decency, thank you very much. I just choose not to display it.” He defended jokingly.

“Uh huh. And that’s your problem.” I smirked, glancing at him from the side.

“Hey! There is nothing wrong with me. I’m just eccentric. Deal with it.” He gave me a high brow as we walked, not even bothering to look where he was going.

I rolled my eyes and smiled. “You’re eccentric alright.” I mumbled under my breath.

“What was that, love?” He asked sharply, giving me an interrogative stare.

I giggled and started to answer him before I heard a loud, deep voice in the distance.

“Eilana! Louis!” Niall called from across the food court, his hands cupping his mouth.

I saw he was with the other boys as they made their way towards us.

“Hey.” I greeted, hugging them all.

“Where the hell have you guys been? We were trying to call you, but you didn’t answer. We’ve been roaming the mall for a half hour now, just trying to find you guys.” Niall explained.

Louis and I exchanged confused looks, pulling out our phones only to see that we both had a few missed calls.

“Didn’t hear them. Sorry.” I shrugged.

“I thought you guys said you would wait for us at the fountain? You weren’t there when we got here.” Harry asked.

“Well we waited for you guys for a half hour but you didn’t show. We assumed you decided not to meet up with us or something.” Louis said.

“Well we would’ve been on time if bad boy over here didn’t take three years to pick an outfit.” Liam teased, jabbing his thumb at Zayn.

Zayn looked at him, seemingly taking slight offense to the joke. “Hey!” He pointed his finger in Liam’s direction. “I’m not the one who took six hours to find a parking spot!” He exaggerated.

I laughed at their bickering and decided to break it up. “Guys, guys. Can we just get on with it? I want some ice cream.” I announced.

“If it’s ice cream the lady wants, it’s ice cream the lady gets.” Harry smiled, turning in the direction of the ice cream place, setting the path for us as we followed behind him rowdily.

I swear it’s like having five children sometimes.

We all got our favorite and sat down at a table in the food court to eat it. I licked at mine furiously as it was already melting too much. I desperately tried to make sure it didn’t drip on my clothes.

“You’re licking that thing like it paid you to.” Niall commented, watching me intently.

I gave him a dirty look and hit him in the side with my elbow. “No one asked you.” I giggled.

“Just saying. If you keep that up you’re going to draw a crowd.” He snickered.

I rolled my eyes playfully and noticed that the rest of the table was looking at me too. My cheeks went pink and I hid behind my ice cream.

“What?” I asked self-consciously.

“Nothing. Just enjoying the show, love.” Louis winked.

I narrowed my eyes at him with a small smile. I quickly glanced at Liam who was just gazing at me quietly. I looked down immediately, feeling like I was in the spotlight suddenly. I continued to eat my ice cream a little slower, trying not to attract attention. I couldn’t help but notice that two particular sets of eyes were still watching me though.

“What are you going to do with your life?” Niall suddenly asked Harry.

“I don’t know. I’m not entirely sure what I want to do with my life yet.” He paused. “It’s just such a big thing, you know? Like, you’re going to pick something that you’ll do for almost the rest of your life. And I want to do something that I enjoy.”

Niall nodded his head lightly, agreeing with the curly haired boy. “Yeah. I don’t want to become just another grown up who hates their job. I want to really love what I do. I want it to be exciting. I want to really live, not sit in an office all day.”

We all nodded in silence, agreeing on the thought. I hadn’t even really thought about it much either. It was a scary thought to me.

“What about you, Zayn?” Harry asked.

I tensed up slightly, knowing that was a question he couldn’t answer honestly. He glimpsed at me, his eyes clearly showing that he didn’t want to lie.

“I don’t know yet, either. I haven’t given it much thought, honestly.” He shrugged, putting his head down.

“We all know what you’re going to be.” Niall said, smiling at Liam.

“A successful doctor.” Harry smirked.

“Well I hope so.” Liam said humbly.

“We know so, bro.” I smiled at him.

They all giggled at my unintentional rhyming.

“And maybe you’ll be a poet.” Zayn joked.

“Shut up.” I laughed.

“What do you want to do?” Niall asked.

I sighed tiredly and put my head in my hand, thinking about it. “I don’t know. Nothing too crazy, but nothing too boring either. Maybe I’ll walk in my mothers footsteps and become a fashion designer.” I shrugged lazily.

“Just don’t go getting a job where we’ll never see you again, okay?” Harry warned.

“Okay.” I giggled.

“And what of you, Louis? What are you going to do?” Liam asked.

“Me? I don’t know. I’ll just go where the road takes me I guess. Where the wind calls and the sun sets, where I’m needed, where no one knows my name…” He said, dragging on dramatically.

We all laughed at his humorous ways.

“No, but seriously.” Zayn asked.

“I don’t know. Do you think I could get far with my looks?” He asked before striking a model pose jokingly.

We all laughed at him again.

“Alright, we’re clearly not going to get a serious answer out of Lou.” Niall commented.

“Well, no matter what we wind up doing, I think we’ll all be just fine.” Louis said, smiling around at all of us.

The whole table turned into genuine smiles.

“I don’t think I’ll ever forget this moment.” I said quietly.

They all smiled at me sweetly, and I smiled right back. I was happier in this moment than I’ve been in a long time. I was so lucky to be surrounded by these guys. I wouldn’t ask for any other friends. They were all I needed.

~

I sighed in frustration for the hundredth time in the last two hours. I just wasn’t getting this home work. I wasn’t getting it at all. There was something missing in my brain I swear it. I was ready to kill someone. I slammed my pen down and plopped down on my bed, laying in silence and anger.

Suddenly, it came to me. Liam. Liam is a genius. He can help me.

I pulled out my phone and texted him quickly, hoping he wasn’t busy at 9:28 on a Friday night.

Could you possibly help me with some homework stuff? I’m just not getting it. :/ xx

I put it down and pulled out my dark green sweater, slipping it on over my camisole. My phone buzzed against my sheets seconds later.

Teddy

Of course.  I’ll come over and try my best to help you. xx

I chewed on my lip, thinking about all the coworkers mom was having over tonight. I decided it wouldn’t be best to study over here.

Actually, do you mind if I come over there?

I stared blankly at the wall in my room, waiting for a reply. My attention snapped back to my phone as a soft whirring noise filled my ears. I grabbed it from off the blanket beside me and scanned over it.

Teddy

That’s just fine. But I’m still going to come pick you up, okay? (That’s a rhetorical question by the way. I won’t accept no as an answer.)  xx

I rolled my eyes at the words on the screen and slipped my shoes on before heading out to the living room. I sat down on the couch, waiting for a knock on the door.

I wonder what Louis is doing right now? Does he miss me? I miss him. I feel like I haven’t seen him in ages, but it’s only been since this morning. Ugh. I’m becoming attached again. Oh well…

I jerked up from the couch when a sudden loud knock interrupted my thoughts and scared me. I went to the door immediately, already smiling before I opened it.

“Hey. Thanks for helping.” I hugged him closely.

“No problem. Ready to go?” He asked, stealing a quick peck on the lips.

“Yeah.” I blushed lightly, locking the door and walking out to his car.

~

I closed up my books and stacked everything up. “Thank you so much, Li. You’re a life saver.” I kissed his cheek.

“Happy to help.” He chuckled, smiling that adorable smile of his.

I stared at him, in somewhat of a daze as I looked over his features. “Liam?”

He quirked an eyebrow at me, telling me to continue.

“How am I ever supposed to pick between you two? I’m starting to think that it’s impossible.” I confessed, falling into his shoulder. “I thought it would get easier, but it’s only getting harder.”

He laughed half-heartedly, pulling me out of my chair and onto his lap. “Well, I can’t tell you the answer to that. That’s one you’ll have to figure out on your own.” He said, tapping the tip of my nose before kissing my lips sweetly.

I grinned at the action. I had grown to love his little random kisses. They made me smile. But for some reason, they weren’t the same as Louis’.

As I watched him staring at me with his dark eyes, I found myself only thinking about Louis. I always compared him and every other guy to Louis. I always have. But is that because I love Louis, or because Louis was the only guy I had in my life for a long time? These were the question that made this so confusing. Nothing was clear. Nothing, except the fact that I loved both of them dearly.

“What are you thinking about?” He asked, furrowing his eyebrows at my thoughtful state.

“…Uh, nothing. I just…-Kiss me.” I demanded.

He didn’t hesitate for a second and pressed his soft lips against mine passionately. I moved my lips in sync with his and gripped his hair in my hands softly.

His kiss was sweet and full of emotion, but it wasn’t the same feeling that Louis gave me. When Louis kissed me, my stomach would always overflow with nerves and my hands would shake, no matter how big or small the kiss. But with Liam, even though his kiss made me feel loved, and as much as I enjoyed it, it just wasn’t the same.

I pulled away slowly. He looked me in the eye, silently asking me.

I lightly sighed and gave him a semi sad expression, not knowing what to say.

“It’s not the same, is it?” He asked, knowing in his eyes.

“What do you mean?” I questioned, even though I knew good and well what he was asking.

“It’s not the same as when he kisses you, is it? There’s a feeling he gives you that’s missing with me. Am I right?” He asked, although it came out as more of a statement.

“…Yeah.” I confirmed, looking down.

“That’s what I thought.” He said, looking off to the side.

“You…you knew?”

“Yeah. I’ve had a feeling for a while now.” He confessed.

“…Why didn’t you say something?”

“I don’t know. I was being selfish again. I just…-I didn’t want to let you go. I wasn’t ready. I’m not ready. I love you, Eilana.” He looked at me with his sad eyes. “But, I feel like I’ve been put into this place of protective and helpful friend for a reason. That’s what I am to you, and that’s all I should be. It’s my place and I should have known that all along. It’s where I should stay. No, I’m not happy about it, but I understand it and I just want nothing more than to see you happy this time. I just feel like I’m holding you back from something. I finally realized the other day that, that something is Louis. I know it is. You two are more perfect for each other than any two people I’ve ever seen. I just want you to do what you think is right without worrying about hurting me. So, I’m letting you go. I’m only giving you one choice. The one that I know is right. Because I’m in love with you Eilana.”

I took in a sharp breath and let it out slowly, stroking his hair as if he were a little boy. “Liam.” I started, feeling so sorry for him. “You only think you’re in love with me. You may love me, but you’re not in love with me.” I shook my head.

“How do you know?” He looked up, his eyes slightly glossed over.

“Because, everyone has their other half. If I’m not in love with you, then I can’t be the one. The one for you will be just as in love with you as you are with her. It has to be that way, right?”

He looked thoughtful for a minute before nodding his head slowly. “I guess you’re right, I just don’t want to believe it. I wanted you to be the one, El.”

“Liam, listen to me.” I said, taking hold of his face between my hands gently. “One day, you’re going to find a girl that deserves you more than I. And she’s going to be wonderful, and beautiful, and perfect to you, and she’s going to love you like you’ll love her, and you’re going to forget all about me. I’m just not the one, Li. And even if you don’t want to hear it, it’s the truth, and you’ll realize that one day. There is a girl out there for you, Liam. And she’s more perfect than you could ever imagine. And the truth is, I’m really just not good enough for you anyway. I mean, you’re this perfect boy, who’s smart and sweet and understanding and wise and I really can’t compare to you. But this girl, this girl will be just right for you, and she’ll be able to stand next to you confidently, and you’ll both be so happy together. And wherever she is, I can’t wait to meet her. Because I know that she’ll be a really amazing woman to be your other half.” I smiled at him and placed a soft, long kiss on his warm cheek.

He looked at me in amazement. “Well, look at you, El. Now who’s the wise one? Teaching me a few things now, eh?” He chuckled, although a bit sad. “But you got one thing wrong.” He said.

I furrowed my brow and looked at him questioningly. “What’s that?”

“I’ll never, never forget about you, Eilana. Not in a million years.” The corners of his lips turned up slightly, assuring me that he was going to be okay.

I smiled and giggled. “Well I’m glad I was wrong about that.” I hugged him.

He hugged me back, just holding onto me for a while. “So Louis is the lucky guy, huh?” He asked with a half-smile.

“I can finally say for sure that he is, yes.” My smile was bigger and brighter than ever the moment I was able to say that.

He chuckled at my happiness. “Well I’m very, very happy for you and him. Really, El. It’s so good to see you smile like this.” He smiled, his eyes beginning to get a bit blurry.

My smile turned into one of admiration at how sweet he was being about all of this. The poor boys heart must have been crushed, yet here he was, smiling for me. I brushed his cheek in affection as I tried not to cry at the scene in front of me.

“Please, Liam. Please don’t cry. I love you, okay? I love you more than the moon and the stars. You have no idea what you mean to me, Liam. You’ll never understand how much you’ve done for me, and I am forever grateful to you. Having you as my friend has been one of the best things that’s ever happened to me, and don’t you ever forget it or think otherwise, alright?” I found myself wiping a tear from my cheek.

His smile was enough to light up the world. “Hey, same here, okay? You’re irreplaceable, El. Don’t you ever forget it or think otherwise, alright?” He winked, chuckling at the smile that came to my face.

“I love you, Liam.” I hugged him.

He wrapped his arms all the way around me, squeezing me tight. “I love you too, Eilana.”

I pulled away and wiped away one last tear.

“Well, what are you waiting for? Go tell him the great news!” He said, sounding happy for me.

“Right!” I jumped up, and put my shoes on. “Thank you for understanding, Liam. Thank you.” I grinned at him.

“I’m just happy that you’re finally happy. Now go make Louis happy.” He grinned back.

I nodded my head once and out the door I went.

Running, dodging, turning corners, crossing streets. I made my way closer and closer to Louis’ house. I could feel the nerves in my stomach start to grow with every leaping step I took. It didn’t take long before it started to rain. I ignored it though. I wasn’t slowing down or stopping now. Nothing would stand between me and Louis now.

I’ve already waited for so long. This whole time, from the day I met him, it was him. It was always him and no one else. Everyone else was a mere distraction, an illusion, blocking me from ever realizing it was Louis to begin with. I’m so stupid. Liam is right, we were made for each other. And I’m never going to let anything get in between us again.

A giant smile took over my face as soon as I saw his house in the near distance. I only sped up, watching it come closer to me as the seconds ticked by in my head. I made it up to the door. I finally came to a stop.

My breathing heavy, my hands shaking, my head racing with thoughts of Louis and nothing else, I stared at the door. I lifted my hand and knocked rapidly four times. I took a big breath and let it out slowly.

Things seemed to slow down for the first time in what seemed liked forever as the door started to open in front of me. It felt as though my heart was going to stop any second, it was beating so fast.

And then I saw it. His face. His beautiful, perfect face. It was staring at me I slight confusion as he took in my dampened, heavy breathing figure before him. None the less, he smiled at the sight of me. And that was all I needed.

I quickly stepped forward, cupping his face before kissing him. He responded quickly, embracing me and returning the kiss. And I felt it. That feeling he gave me. It was there and it was stronger than ever.

I pulled away, smiling at him brighter than ever before. “It’s you, Louis.” I said breathlessly.

“What? I don’t understand. What’s going on, love?” He asked, a little confused by all of this.

“It’s you. It was always you, Lou-Bear.” I repeated. “It’s you.” I whispered happily.

His lips formed a bright smile before he kissed me again. “It’s me? I’m the one? I’m the one you want?”

“Yes, Louis! You’re the one I love. I want you and nobody else.” I smiled as he laced his fingers through mine, giving me short, loving kisses.

“I love you, Eilana. I’m in love with you.” He looked at me, his eyes bright with happiness.

“I’m in love with you too, Mr. Tomlinson, and I’m afraid you’re going to have to deal with it.” I said, scrunching my nose up as he kissed my forehead.

“I think I can deal with that.” He smiled.

Chapter Text

"You're so beautiful." Louis whispered, nuzzling his nose into my neck.

I giggled at his compliment, looking down with a slight blush as everyone at the lunch table stared at us.

"You guys are that couple." Zayn said, watching us with a look of horror.

I laughed and gave him a look. "Oh shush. We're a new couple, it's going to be like this for a while." I smirked at him.

"Well I hope you guys get over it soon, because it really is sickening." He looked away, arms crossed as he leaned back in his chair.

"Are you sassing my girl, mate?" Louis questioned, narrowed eyes closely watching him.

"I wasn't sassing her. I was simply informing you that your behavior towards each other is going to make us lose our lunch." He replied dryly.

Louis raised his brow at Zayn before turning back to me with a sweet smile. "Ignore him, babe. He's just going to have to get over how much I adore you." He rubbed his nose against mine, scrunching his face up.

"Aw, come on! Now you're just trying to make us sick." Harry commented.

Louis chuckled and smirked at Harry, confirming his suspicion.

"You wanker! You're going to make us all sick!" He said, smirking at Louis before chuckling himself. "Cut it out, mate." He shook his head with a smile.

I giggled at the situation, knowing that Louis was beyond proud of the fact that I was his girl now. He certainly liked to let everyone know. But I'm not going to lie, I love it. Even though I wasn't supposed to even so much as be friends with him according to my loser status, I was happy that he was still proud to parade me around, despite everyone else thinking I was below him. I had no doubt that I was more important to him than his reputation.

"Alright, alright. You caught me. But don't think that there won't be plenty of affectionate displays in the future." He smirked at the boys and sat back, throwing his arm around me.

I looked at Harry. He was smiling and laughing as he and Louis kept going back and forth with their banter. He glanced at me, a small genuine smile across his lips. I smiled back, happy that he was alright with all of this after all.

"Shut up, you idiots." Liam piped up suddenly. "They love each other and if they want the other to know it at this very moment, then they have every right to show it." He defended calmly.

I watched him in interest, not expecting that from Liam of all people. I smiled when I realized that he was actually supportive of our relationship. He caught my eye and smiled sweetly at me. I smiled back, a silent thank you in my eyes.

"And when did you become the captain of their ship?" Niall asked with a smirk.

Liam gave him an odd look before smacking him over the head with his empty coke bottle.

"As long as you two keep it hush hush, I'm not complaining." Zayn spoke up.

"Thank you, Zaynie-Bear." I smiled at him, knowing he was secretly happy for us. Always an act with that boy.

"So are we all hanging after school today, or do you two have plans?" Niall asked.

Louis and I looked at each other, silently having a conversation.

"I think we'll get together later tonight. We have plans, but they shouldn't take up the whole day." Louis said.

"But when I asked earlier you said you didn't have any plans." Harry said.

Louis gave him a look, and it all became clear to him.

"Oh." He dragged out. "I get it." He smirked.

I blushed, knowing that he was getting the wrong idea entirely, but I didn't say anything. We had just meant that we wanted some alone time to ourselves, but of course they would all take it the wrong way.

He gave Louis a thumbs up, and Louis just shook his head and rolled his eyes. "So uh, yeah. We'll meet up with you guys later." He clarified.

"Sure, sure. Well don't wear yourselves out." Niall chuckled, joined by everyone else, even Louis.

I gasped at his bold joke, reeling back and smacking his upper arm.

He winced and cradled the stinging skin. "Hey! Just a word of advice..." He trailed off, still chuckling to himself.

“You’re nasty. All of you. Your minds immediately go to one place.” I giggled, shaking my head.

“That’s just boys, love.” Liam grinned.

I rolled my eyes, smiling as I leaned into Louis. “Well you boys are dirty.” I commented. “Not that I would have it any other way.” I smirked.

“And that’s why we love you.” Harry smirked back.

~

I pushed through the people blocking me from what I most wanted to see. I finally made it through the doors, frantically looking about for his car. I spotted him almost instantly. He was leaning up against his car, Ray-Bans on, wind-swept hair, denim button up and red jeans. He looked like a model standing there, and he was all mine. I could see his toothy smile from all the way over here, and I smiled back, running towards him as fast as I could.

As I approached him, he held his arms out for me, bending his knees slightly. I jumped right into his arms. He caught me with ease as we kissed sweetly. My back made contact with the cold metal of his car as he pressed me against it. I gripped his hair in one hand, and the back of his shirt with the other as I kissed back.

He broke away and put me down, smacking my bottom quickly. “Get in.” He said, opening the door for me with a smirk.

I got in without wasting a second and watched him casually stroll around to the other side, getting in and starting it up.

“Where are we going?” I asked.

“Where do you want to go?” He asked, laying a hand on my thigh.

“Mom isn’t home.” I said simply, but he knew exactly what I meant.

“Your house it is then.” He smiled at me and pulled out of the lot.

I laid my hand on top of his, wrapping my fingers around it. He smiled at me happily and pulled my hand up to his face, kissing it and putting it in his lap.

“I love you.” He said through his smile.

“I love you too.” I smiled back.

“I’m so happy that I can say that to you whenever I want now. I’ve waited so long.” He glanced at me with happiness in his eyes.

“And I love hearing it.” I giggled.

“Well good, because you’ll be hearing it a lot.” He wiggled his eyebrows at me.

I couldn’t contain my smile as I looked at him. I studied his calm face. Smooth, flawless skin, an adorable nose, pink lips, long eyelashes, sparkling blue eyes. He was the perfect picture of beauty to me.

“Louis?” My voice was soft and quiet.

He looked to me quickly, an eyebrow raised in question.

“…Nothing.” I smiled.

He gave me a confused face before shrugging and dropping it. “Weirdo.” He teased with a smirk.

I scoffed at him and hit his arm with my free hand. “You can’t go five minutes without teasing someone, can you?”

“Nope.” He said proudly.

I rolled my eyes at him, giggling at his childishness. “I swear…”

~

I laid my stuff down on the kitchen counter and took off my shoes. I started to walk towards the living room when I felt an arm wrap around my waist, pulling me back into them. I smiled to myself, feeling his lips against my neck.

“You smell good, babe.” His voice was husky in my ear.

I giggled slightly at his comment. “You do too.” I turned around in his grip, looking up to his face.

“But you smell prettier.” He smiled, raising an eyebrow. “But then, you are a girl, so…”

I laughed at him and got on my tiptoes, kissing his lips. They were warm and soft, and they moved against mine perfectly.

I grabbed his arms, feeling the muscles flex as he picked me up and set me on the counter. His hands placed themselves on my thighs, rubbing them slowly as his lips continued to control me. I ran my hands down the back of his neck and all the way down his back. I couldn’t help myself and grabbed his ass, which was a bit much for my small hands, but I could tell it turned him on. His kiss got heavier and he grabbed me under the knees, parting my legs and pulling me to the edge of the counter until I was against him. One of his hands made its way up the back of my shirt, sending a shiver through me as his warm fingertips brushed the bare skin. I softly moaned into the kiss, trailing my fingers up his tanned arms. He broke the kiss and his lips came to linger over the skin of my neck.

“I knew you would give in and grab it one day.” He said, nipping at my ear.

I could practically hear the smirk on his lips, and giggled as I blushed. My giggle quickly turned into a moan when his teeth grazed my neck, biting down gently and sucking, making a bruise that wouldn’t show up until tomorrow. My head slowly rolled to the side, my hand limply gripping onto his soft brown locks. My breaths were deep, and my eyes were closed.

I felt him pull away slowly, stopping an inch away from my face. He had a smile on his lips. “The fact that I can do this to you with such small touches makes me wonder what I could do to you if I really tried.” He smirked, his eyes showing a small glint of lust. He put a finger under my chin and kissed my lips sweetly. “I love you so much, Eilana.” He rested his forehead against mine.

Smiling, I took his face in my hands and kissed his forehead. “You’re something else, Mr. Tomlinson.”

His nose became scrunched, and his eyebrows furrowed. “Is that a good thing?” He asked.

“It’s a very good thing.” I giggled.

His toothy smile came through, warming me completely.

“I love your smile.” I said simply.

“It’s not as good as yours though. I feel a bit sad for you that you’ll never see the sheer beauty of your genuine smile.” He kissed my lips again. “It’s really a sight to see. Believe me.” He winked.

~

“Is she prettier than me?” I asked, suddenly feeling self-conscious as we watched the movie. She was perfect, and I couldn’t help but to think that Louis was thinking that she was pretty.

He looked at me, his face telling me that I was crazy for thinking such a thing. “No one is more gorgeous than you. No one.” He kissed me. “Not even me.” He smirked.

I gave him a look like he was an idiot and hit him.

He chuckled and snuggled into me. “I was just joking!” He laughed. “Hey, are you hungry?” He asked randomly.

“I’m getting there.” I replied, just realizing that my stomach was feeling a bit bare.

“What do you want to do for dinner, babe?”

“Why don’t we go out with the guys? We’ve been on our own for a good while now. I suppose they’re probably waiting for our call.”

He groaned dramatically. “Fine. If we have to.” He pretended to be mad, then smiled at me when I looked back at him. “I’ll call them.” He said, digging out his phone.

I turned down the volume of the movie we were watching as he called them.

“Hey, mate.” I heard him say as the voice, who was clearly Harry, on the other end picked up. “I think we’re ready to come out and join society again. Are you guys hungry? …Uh huh….okay….see you there.” He hung up.

I looked at him with curiosity as he put his phone away. “Well?”

“Come on, then. Time to go eat, love.” He said, waiting for me to get off of him and off the couch.

I stood up, adjusting my clothes when I felt a slap to my backside. “Louis!” I squeaked, jumping out of his reach.

He chuckled and stood up, taking me by the hand and leading me towards the car.

“We might need shoes.” I said loudly, clearing my throat as I looked down to his bare feet.

He stopped in his tracks and turned around. “If you really think so.” He joked and went back inside quickly grabbing mine and his shoes and handing them to me when he got back.

I giggled at his rushing around and got in the car. “You must really be hungry, eh?”

“I am dangerous right now. I could eat anything.” He exaggerated.

I laughed. “You boys and your hunger all the time.” I buckled up just as he peeled out of my driveway, a little too eager to get there.

“Well I’m a growing boy, I need my food.” He defended.

I looked at him wide eyed. “You better not be! If you get any bigger you’re going to accidently sit on me one day and squash me!” I laughed.

“Is that a fat joke?” He asked sharply.

“I don’t know. Are you fat?” I snickered.

“No!” He replied quickly.

“Well then I guess not.” I smirked.

He chuckled at me, shaking his head. “Who taught you to be so rude?”

“You.”

“That’s right.” He smiled.

“Only you would be proud of your girlfriend for offending you.” I rolled my eyes and smiled.

“But you understand it, and that’s one of the many reasons we’re perfect together.” He grinned.

“You’re lucky that the person that loves you just so happens to be the only person that understands you. I highly doubt that anyone else would put up with your fuckery.” I laughed.

“I am a blessed man.” He chuckled, taking my hand in his.

We finally pulled up to our destination, seeing the other boys and their cars waiting outside for us. They saw us pull up and they waved before starting to chase after the car, slapping it frantically. Louis laughed and flipped them all off before parking, carefully watching as not to run over one of the guys feet.

Niall opened my door for me and helped me out. “Hello, darlin’.” He hugged me with a bright smile on his face.

“Hey, Ni.” I smiled back, happy to see my friends again. “Hey, Harry.” I said, hugging him next. “And my Liam, and the Zaynster.” I finished hugging them all.

“Where’s mine?” I heard Louis’ fake hurt voice behind me.

“Lou, I’ve been with you all day.” I laughed.

Well then…” He crossed his arms and pretended to be hurt as he turned away from me.

“You’re such an idiot.” I mumbled as I hugged him.

His face changed into a victorious smile as he put his arm around me. “Let’s fucking eat!” He said a little loud for my comfort, as we were getting stares from the other people entering the restaurant.

“Shh!” I put my finger to my lips, giggling at his behavior.

He laughed at himself and led me to the door. We all got seated and the waiter took our drink order.

“You’re still alive I see.” Harry aimed at me.

I picked my head up from the menu, a bit lost at what he was saying. All eyes were on me, and I felt as though I was missing something. I finally got it and my eyes went a little wide. “Oh. Oh! …Oh. Harry!” I scolded.

He laughed like a dork, putting his hand on his stomach. “I’m surprised. You’re more durable than I thought.” He joked.

“You dirty bastard!” I laughed. “Just assume things why don’t you?”

“I will, thank you.” He smiled cheekily.

I rolled my eyes and kicked him under the table, laughing in satisfaction when he yelped and grabbed his shin quickly.

“You guys sure have some interesting dinner table conversations.” Liam chimed in.

“Hey, it’s Harry, not me.” I defended.

“You’re a part of it though.” He retorted.

I stuck my tongue out at him. “Can I just look at my menu in peace?” I asked.

“Nope. That’s what we’re here for.” Zayn smiled.

I looked at him over the top of the plastic covered paper, playfully narrowing my eyes at him. “Uh huh.” I agreed.

“Hey, did you guys hear about who’s coming through on tour?” Niall asked, changing the topic suddenly.

We all shook our heads, curiosity on our faces.

“The Killers.” He announced.

“Oh! We have to go!” Louis said, looking at me immediately.

“You’re such a fanboy.” Harry smirked at Louis.

“We should all go.” Liam said.

“Yeah! That sounds fun.” I smiled.

“Awesome. I’ll get us tickets.” Niall said.

Our waiter came back to take our order, not sparing any odd looks at the weird things we were joking and carrying on about.

“So, are we agreeing to stay relatively close when we all head off to college?” Harry asked.

“I certainly hope so.” Niall said, his face showing the bit of fear he felt waiting for our answers.

“Well I plan on it. I don’t know about you guys.” I shrugged, hoping they would agree too.

“I would like to.” Liam stated.

“Me too. I don’t know if I could make new friends. They would never put up with me.” Zayn chuckled.

We all looked at Louis expectantly.

“I’m going wherever this girl is going.” He smiled, gesturing to me.

“So it’s agreed, then?” Liam asked.

“Definitely.” I said with a smile. “The last thing I want to do is leave you guys behind.”

“I think we all feel the same, El. No worries.” Zayn smiled at me.

~

I hopped up the stairs quickly, heading towards his room. I knocked on the door, waiting for a response.

The door opened and there stood Harry, a confused but happy smile on his face.

“El? What are you doing here?” He asked.

“I came to see you, silly.” I giggled.

“But I just saw you yesterday night.” He raised a brow. “Eh, not that I don’t want to see you!” He chuckled nervously, realizing he sounded a bit rude.

“I know, curly. But I wanted to talk to you about something.” I informed him.

“Ah. Come in, love.” He opened his bedroom door wider. “What can I do for you?”

“Nothing. I just wanted to ask how your sessions were going.” I said, sitting down on the edge of his bed.

“Oh, that.” He sat next to me, silent for a second in thought.

Harry had kept his word to speak to someone. Ever since then, he’s been going to see someone weekly, and he seemed to be doing better.

“Well, it’s going good. Much better than I expected. I actually enjoy it.” He laughed slightly. “And you were right, I needed it. I can already tell that it’s helped me. I just feel… so much better on a regular basis. I always thought that I was perfectly fine most of the time, but now I see just how miserable I was, even when I thought I was happy. Just shows you how much I know.” He smirked, putting his head down.

I smiled, happy to hear that it was helping. “That’s great! I’m so happy for you, Harry.” I hugged him. “And what of your parents?” I asked timidly.

He sucked in a big breath. “Mum has agreed to go back to rehab.” He said, a sad smile forming on his face.

“That’s good, right?”

“Yeah, it’s great. But, dad… well he’s a little harder to get through to. He doesn’t think there’s anything wrong with him. But, maybe being away from mum for a while will be good for him. Maybe he’ll remember that he loves her.” He nodded his head slowly, as if trying to convince himself of it.

“I’m sure he will, Harry. Things will get better. And I’m always right here for you, don’t forget that.” I wrapped my arms around him protectively.

His head fell onto my shoulder like a tired little boy. “Thank you, El.”

I stroked his hair lovingly. “Soon you’ll be headed off to college and you won’t have to deal with this every day anymore.” I reminded him.

He sighed softly. “Yeah, you’re right. I just hope I can fix things before I leave. I don’t want to leave things like this.”

“I have a feeling that you won’t.” I gave him a small smile and let him go.

“Well I hope you’re right.” He said.

“When am I ever wrong?” I giggled.

He looked at me, clearly remembering a few times. We both broke out in laughter.

“Alright, alright. But it was just a few times.” I joked.

“Right. Just a few.” He smirked.

~

I was walking the halls of the school with Louis, making our way to lunch. He had an arm around me as we walked, cracking jokes and sending smiles at each other.

As we passed by one of the more popular boys of the school, he decided to make a remark to his friend about us, thinking we couldn’t hear him. Or maybe he just didn’t care. Either way, we heard him.

“What the fuck was Tomlinson thinking? I mean, she’s pretty I guess, but seriously? What kind of family does she come from? I’ll never understand what he sees in her. I guess she’s just a good fuck.” He snickered to his friend.

It had been three weeks that Louis and I were an official couple, and people were still heckling us about it.

Before I could even register the rest of his sentence, Louis had whipped around and had him up against the lockers, his feet dangling beneath him.

“Excuse me, you lame fuck?!” Louis spit in his face, already looking beyond angry.

“Whoa! Chill out, man!” He held his hands up in defense.

“Chill out? Chill out?!” He roared. “I don’t fucking think so! You want to insult my girl without me ripping you a new one?! It’s not going to happen, mate! Are you that much of a dumbshit that you’re going to talk shit about her in front of me?!”

I just stared on at the scene, shocked and mouth agape. It had drawn quite the crowd. The entire hallway was packed, and people still continued to flood in from the cafeteria.

“It wasn’t meant for you to hear.” He tried to explain, his voice shrinking under Louis’ intimidating stare.

“Oh, I wasn’t meant to hear it?! Well that makes it okay, I suppose?! You know what, I’m going to beat you that much more for that! You rude, despicable, disgusting, self-absorbed, unworthy, asshole! How dare you talk about her like that! As if you’re any better, assfuck!” He slammed his back against the locker again, looking like he was ready to tear the guys throat out.

“Louis, maybe you should just let him go.” I intervened, my voice not as loud as I hoped it would be.

He looked back at me for a second, his face softening. “Eilana, he insulted you. He deserves to get his ass beat!” He looked back at the trembling man, a wicked smile on his lips.

“I take it back! I take it back, okay? I didn’t mean it! Honest!” He tried to plead with Louis.

“Do you? Then you wouldn’t mind apologizing to her in front of all these people.” He dropped the guy suddenly, resulting in the guy almost falling over.

He regained his balance and looked at Louis, still scared and confused.

“Well?!” Louis barked, signaling towards me.

“Louis, this really isn’t necessary…” I started, almost feeling bad for the guy. Almost.

“I-I’m so-“ He started.

“On your knees!” He demanded.

The guy glanced back at Louis, looking for some type of mercy. “Do I have to?” He mumbled. He was no doubt incredibly embarrassed in front of half the school.

“No. I can just beat you and be done with it.” He said, cracking his knuckles.

I could see the fear flash in his eyes and he sighed in defeat before dropping to his knees in front of me. “I’m… sorry. I didn’t mean what I said.” He mumbled, his eyes on the floor.

“What was that?” Louis voice rang through the halls.

“I said I’m sorry!” He almost yelled. “Good enough?!” He asked Louis.

“Yeah, I suppose that will do.” He shrugged before walking over to him. “But next time you decide to be a smartass, I won’t be so sweet about it.” He warned, placing his vans covered foot on the guys chest and pushing him over, spitting on him.

There was immediate chatter among the onlookers. Whispers, laughs, oohs, and just shocked silence at the scene.

“Come on, babe. Let’s get out of here. Their stupidity might be contagious.” He put his arm around me and we walked on through the crowd towards the lunch room.

~

I sighed as I made it through the door to my house, Louis trailing not far behind.

I put my stuff down and laid down on the couch. I thought about the other boys faces when they heard what had happened in school earlier. They all gave Louis fist bumps and high fives, telling him what an awesome guy he was for doing that. I personally, was happier than I would have liked to admit about it, but there was still a part of me that almost felt bad for the guy. I probably would have, had it not been for the fact that the same guy used to pick on me all the time.

I watched Louis walk in and take his shoes off, then walk over to me with a cheeky smile on his face. He slowly crawled onto the couch, holding himself over me. He kissed my lips for a second and pulled away with that same smile.

I smiled back up at him and gave him a curious look. “What are you doing?” I asked playfully, staring up at him.

“Nothing.” He said before kissing me again. “Why? Would you like me to do something?” He asked cheekily.

“Maybe.” I smirked.

He held his smile, looking at me for a short moment. His head slowly lowered to my neck, softly kissing the skin under my ear. He worked his way down, placing soft butterfly kisses along my neck, and down to my collarbone. I placed my arms around his neck and played with the top of his jacket. His kisses got more heated as he worked his way back up, sucking, biting, licking his way along my skin. I pulled his face up, capturing his lips with mine. He returned it, his tongue licking my bottom lip before slipping it into my mouth. I blushed at the situation, not being familiar with it, but I enjoyed it regardless. He was so much more experienced than me, but I didn’t let it intimidate me.

I grabbed his hair at the bottom of his neck, gently pulling at it. I remembered that he liked it, and just like I thought, he moaned into my mouth at the treatment. His hands came around to my chest, gently squeezing them in his large hands. I whimpered as his kiss stopped and my lips were left bare again. I pulled him back down towards me, letting him know that I wanted him. He smiled at the gesture and kissed me passionately for a few seconds before pulling away again. His head moved down to my collarbone again, kissing down, and down, until he reached my cleavage. His eyes shot up to me before his wet tongue pressed against the skin between my breasts and slowly licked up to my neck, making me giggle lightly. I found myself blushing continuously at his treatment, as it was much more intimate than ever before.

I looked to the side, shying away from his gaze in slight embarrassment. His hand came under my neck, turning me to look at him. He smiled at me and kissed my lips sweetly, knowing that I was feeling a bit uncomfortable. I bit my lip, trying not to be so intimidated by his piercing blue stare. Although his eyes showed only love, I still couldn’t help but be shy under his gaze. His lips came back to mine in a loving kiss. I kissed him back, finally starting to relax again. I felt his hips roll against mine and I responded, grinding mine against him in sync.

His hands were lost in my hair as we kissed and rubbed against the other. I could feel my cheeks go crimson as I felt him against my thigh. I could feel him getting harder by the second, and it was difficult to ignore as my cheeks continued to burn in my state of shyness. His kisses and touches getting continually rougher and more heated was another telling sign of how turned on he was getting. Soft sounds of pleasure started to pour from my mouth as it was all starting to get to me. The kiss, the touching, the friction, the moans coming from him, it was all starting to really take effect on me as my body temperature rose and my breathing became more uneven, and I could feel myself getting wet. My face was still flushed and my grip on his shoulders was getting tighter, alerting him to stop like he always did when it got to this point. That was something I admired about Louis. I never had to worry that he would take something too far, and I loved that he knew me well enough for that, but this time, I didn’t want him to stop.

He started to pull away from me, but I kept my grip on him and pulled him back into me. He gave me a confused look, silently asking me what I was doing. I swallowed my shyness and took in a shaky breath.

“I-I want this. I want you.” I told him, my voice quiet and still a bit shaky.

He only gazed at me, making sure he heard me right. “Are you sure, love?” He asked, clearly doubting that I meant it.

“…Yes. I love you, Louis.” I said honestly.

He stared at me for a second, making absolute sure before wrapping his arms around me, suddenly picking me up and surprising me. He carried me to my room, shutting the door with his foot and laying me down gently on the bed. He crawled over me slowly, leaning down to kiss me sweetly. It calmed me for a few seconds before he sat back up and his hands slowly trailed down my shirt, grabbing the bottom and pulling it up. I sat up slightly so he could pull it over my head and laid back down, feeling the nerves already building in the pit of my stomach. His eyes locked with mine as his fingers sat at the waistline of my jeans. I gave him silent permission to continue and he unbuttoned them, pulling them off gently, not wanting to frighten me. I watched as his fingers stripped me, leaving me a bit cold. I felt uncomfortable being like this in front of him suddenly, even after all the times that I paraded around him in my underwear before. This was just… different though, and I felt an urge to cover myself as he gazed at my body.

I didn’t like that I was the only one almost naked, so I grabbed his black denim jacket and pulled it down. He smirked at me, helping me take it off. He threw it to the side and I started to unbutton his white shirt, my hands shaking with nerves. He smiled down at me as I worked, he reached out and brushed my hair sweetly. I got to the last button and he grabbed it, taking it off swiftly and throwing it to the side as well. I gulped at the sight of his bare skin, golden and flawless. It made me feel even more uncomfortable that he was so perfect and I was… well, not. He must have sensed my uneasiness, leaning down to kiss me. I was so distracted by his lips, I didn’t even notice where his hands were until I felt my bra come loose. I blushed as he pulled it off and threw it to the floor. He pulled away from me and gazed along my body underneath him.

“To say that you’re gorgeous would be an insult to your beauty.” He cradled my face in his hand, kissing me deeply.

The feeling in my stomach still building, making me feel more and more uneasy, but I wanted this, and I wasn’t going to let my nerves stop me. I kissed him back with want, feeling the soft skin of his back underneath my fingertips. He kissed down my neck, my chest, and right down to the hemline of my black lacey underwear. I took in a shaky breath, watching him closely. His eyes looked up at me, as if asking for permission. He noticed how nervous I was and lifted his head slightly.

“You’re sure, love? You don’t have to do this. I can wait.” He offered like a gentleman.

I breathed out slowly. “No. I want this, Louis. I want it to be you, no one else.” I assured him.

He nodded lightly and stuck his fingers in the top of them, pulling them down and off my legs. I could feel my face heating up again. He slid back up to me, kissing me shortly again before looking into my eyes.

“This is going to be a little painful.” He warned, his face scrunched up slightly at the bad news.

“I know.” I nodded.

“I’m going to make it hurt as little as possible, okay? Just trust me, love. The last thing I want to do is hurt you.” He told me, kissing both of my cheeks and my lips softly.

I nodded again, letting him know I trusted him. If there was anyone in this world that I trusted, it was Louis.

“Just relax.” He whispered into my ear, his voice soft and soothing. “Ready, love?”

I closed my eyes, swallowing and breathing deeply. I gave him a short nod, too nervous to speak. I felt his hand against my body, trailing down my stomach and working downwards to my center, until I felt his fingers graze my most sensitive area. My body shook slightly, new to the feeling. He continued further down and slowly, very gently pushed one of his fingers into me. I tensed up at the feeling, making him stop in his tracks. I breathed out and nodded for him to keep going. He slowly continued to pump in and out of me, being very careful not to hurt me. Once I relaxed, getting used to the feeling, he added another finger, gauging my reaction. I took in a sharp breath at the action, looking down at him with pink cheeks.

“Does it hurt?” He asked me softly.

“No, it’s just uncomfortable.” I told him, trying to focus on the pleasure and not the slight pain.

He started to move into me again, still careful not to go too fast. He curled his fingers and kept a steady rhythm, bringing a new sensation. I moaned lightly at the new feeling, starting to feel more of the pleasurable side of things. His other hand came down and his thumb rubbed at the little bundle of nerves, causing another moan to slip past my lips. I gripped the sheets beside me, the feeling almost too strong for me to handle. My breathing was becoming shorter by the second, and my body was becoming warmer at his touch. I could feel him stretching me out little by little as I got used to it.

He pulled his fingers out of me and came back up, smiling sweetly down at me, he kissed me gently. He stood up just for a second to unbutton his jeans and slide them off. I stared at his body, lusting after it hungrily. Just staring at him made me wet. His body was perfect to me in every way. His black Calvin Klein boxer-shorts came off next, leaving him in all his natural beauty. My face became warmer as I took in the sight. After taking in his size, I looked up at him, with a face asking how this is possibly going to work. He crawled back over me, a small, sweet smile on his face as he brushed my face with his hand. I looked up at him, still nervous. His hands found my own, lacing his fingers between mine and holding them firmly but gently at the sides of my head. I took a deep breath and let it out, letting him know I was ready. He looked at me lovingly before kissing me sweetly and passionately. It relaxed me just enough before he pushed into me gently. My breathing stopped at the sudden pain it gave me, although it wasn’t unbearable, it did hurt a lot. I bit my lip and tightened my grip on his hands. I could see the pain in his eyes at the fact that he had hurt me. I smiled slightly, despite the fact that I was in pain. He couldn’t be any sweeter.

He pushed all the way in and stopped his movements, letting me adjust to his size. I concentrated on my breathing, trying to get used to the feeling of him inside me. After a quite a few seconds, I gave him a nod letting him know it was okay to move. He slowly pulled out of me and pushed back in as gently as he could, repeating the process over and over. I squeezed my eyes shut at the pain, feeling a single tear slip down my cheek. Louis kissed it away and kissed my lips lovingly, making me feel better. His kiss calmed me, taking the focus away from the pain. One of his hands left mine, making me uneasy until I felt it at my core, rubbing circles on my most sensitive spot. It increased the pleasure I was feeling and took away from the pain even more, making it almost completely vanish.

After a short while, the pain was gone and I could feel nothing but pure bliss in his movements. I started to moan again, letting him know it felt good. He brought his hand back up to mine, holding them sweetly as he slowly picked up the pace of his thrusts. I could feel more and more pleasure start to build as his thrusts became quicker, and the moans and whimpers started to become constant. I looked up into his eyes, my own barely open at the feeling of him pumping in and out of me. He gazed down at me with his loving blue eyes before kissing me. His movements were rapid now, and I couldn’t contain myself at the sensation forming in my lower stomach. Beads of sweat were starting to form on his forehead, his chest rising and falling quickly, his grip on my hands never leaving.

The room was getting less and less quiet as our moans and panting became louder. My mind was becoming cloudy, and the only thing I could see was Louis. The only thing I could feel, hear, think about, it was all Louis. I was beyond happy and I didn’t want this moment to end. Louis and I were finally one, and I’ve never felt closer to him. I closed my eyes, focusing on the feeling of his warm body against mine. It was so much more amazing than I thought it would be. I reached up and put my hands on the back of his neck, pulling him in for another kiss. I just loved him so much and words weren’t enough. His lips against mine never felt so good. The feeling was starting to become too intense and I had to part for breath. I squeezed my eyes shut again, not used to the feeling. It kept rising by the second, and I couldn’t control my moans of ecstasy. He started to give a few loud groans, the sound of it making me hotter.

“Louis! I-I think I’m-“ I could barely even speak clearly.

“Me too, baby.” He panted, another moan falling from his lips.

I grabbed onto his upper back, my nails digging in at the ever growing sensation. He thrusts a few more times before I felt an explosive feeling of pleasure overwhelm me completely. I moaned his name loudly as I scratched down his back, breathing heavily as the feeling ripped through my body. Right after that a gruff groan came from him as I felt him empty himself inside me, a slew of curse words following. He collapsed onto me, breathing heavily. I lay drained of any energy, my legs still slightly shaking. He kissed me sweetly, smiling at me with eyes full of happiness.

“I love you so much, Eilana.” He said, his voice still husky.

“I love you too, Louis.” I kissed his nose before he pulled out of me and rolled over, pulling me into him.

“I’m sorry I hurt you, love.” He kissed my forehead.

I giggled at his sweetness. “It’s okay, Louis. It’s unavoidable. And besides, I think you more than made up for that.” I smirked.

He chuckled and brushed the hair from my face. “Still, I feel bad.” He frowned.

I smiled and kissed him. “Don’t. It was perfect.”

A small smile appeared on his lips. “I’m one lucky man. The luckiest.” He grinned.

I laughed and cuddled up to him, wanting to be as close as possible. “Well I’m the luckiest girl then.” I inhaled his cologne, smiling at the familiar scent.

He chuckled and kissed the top of my head, pulling the covers over us.

I closed my eyes, absolutely exhausted, and listened to his heartbeat before drifting off.

~

“Come on! You guys are all so slow!” Niall shouted at us as we were still getting changed into our swimsuits.

“Hold on a second!” I shouted back, giggling as I finished getting dressed and opened the door, running out towards Liam’s pool.

I saw that the others were coming out at right about the same time. We all ran and jumped into the pool. Liam tackled Niall, sending them both underwater.

Harry grabbed the beach ball, throwing it hard and hitting Zayn’s head with it.

“Hey!” He shouted at Harry as Harry swam away quickly to the deeper side of the pool. “If I could swim, you would be so dead right now!” He chuckled after his empty threat.

We all laughed and Louis turned towards me, lifting me up.

“What’s that?” Zayn asked, his voice full of curiosity and also knowing.

“What’s what?” I asked.

“That.” He pointed to Louis’ back.

My eyes widened and I looked at Louis, remembering the scratch marks I had made the night before. Louis just chuckled and didn’t say anything, clearly proud of himself.

“Oooh!” Harry started.

“Someone got some last night.” Niall commented, wiggling his eyebrows at us.

I went bright red and took cover in Louis’ chest.

“Well, well.” Harry said, smirking at Louis. “Proud.” Was all he said, patting Louis on the shoulder.

I rolled my eyes at their immaturity. “You all need to grow up and learn to stay out of people’s sexual business.” I laughed.

“Oh we will. “Liam assured. “Just not today.” He smirked.

“Oh well. It’s out in the open now, babe.” Louis chuckled at me, nuzzling his nose into my cheek.

“Yeah. I figured that might happen.” I giggled.

“Louis and Eilana did it!” Harry started to yell around the pool.

“Shut up!” I laughed.

“Eilana and Louis, sitting in a tree, f-u-c-k-i-n-g!” He sang like a twelve year old with a giant grin on his face.

I couldn’t help but laugh, this whole situation was comical.

“At least they know that you’re mine for good now.” Louis winked at me, making me blush again.

Honestly, as embarrassed as I was about it, I was really happy about it too. I wouldn’t change a thing. Louis was most definitely the one, and I was more than happy to know that he of all people, was it.

My life couldn’t be any better.

Chapter Text

This was it. This was the moment that I was finally free from all the snobbish glances and the rude whispers. As I watched all the hats being thrown to the sky, I was finally free. I had done it. I had survived the hell hole they call high school.

It’s been almost five months that Louis and I have been together, and my life has never been better. I was absolutely, positively happy. But then, Louis has always been the best at making me happy. The guys have gotten totally used to it now, and things returned to normal between the guys and I long ago. Things have been pretty much smooth sailing since that point, and now, it’s time for us to start another chapter together.

I immediately ran to my mother, hugging her in complete joy and relief. She was waiting for me with open arms, a proud smile on her kind face.

"I'm finally done." I sighed contently.

"Yep. And now you've got college to worry about." She joked.

"Yeah. But I think we've got that all settled. The boys and I have already talked about it." I told her.

"Eilana!" I heard a loud call and the sound of multiple pairs of feet charging towards me.

I turned around to see them all coming at me with bright smiles on their faces. Louis, Harry, Niall, Liam, and Zayn. I couldn't help but to beam right back at them at the sight of all their happy smiles.

They all attacked me in a tight group hug, laughing and yelling as I was smashed in between them all.

"We're free!" Niall shouted excitedly.

We all chuckled at him and tightened our grip on each other again. There was a bright flash and we all turned to my mother.

"Picture time!" She smiled, holding up her camera.

We all got in position and took a couple pictures. We took one of us in a row to begin with, and then we took one of us pulling stupid faces, and one of all the boys holding me up, and of course we took a few of just Louis and I being all cute and smitten with each other.

“So dinner time, right?” Zayn asked, looking around at us for an answer.

“Yes, Zayn. Dinner time. Everyone gather their families and we shall find a nice place to eat.” I said, ruffling Niall’s hair.

They all dispersed in separate directions toward their family. After a few minutes, Louis was the first to show up with his mother, Lottie, Fizzy, Phoebe, and Daisy, who he was carrying.

“They’re all here!” He announced, smiling brightly as he kissed the little one’s cheek, causing her to giggle and wipe at her face.

I smiled back at him, greeting his mother and sisters before walking over to stand beside him.

“Alright, we’re all hungry and ready to go.” Zayn’s voice was heard as he approached us, his father and mother in tow, along with three girls who I had never met before. I assumed they were the sisters he had mentioned before, and smiled welcomingly at them.

“Let’s get this show on the road!” Niall yelled as he leaped back toward us, his mother and father behind him, as well as his older brother Greg, who I recall meeting briefly once.

I greeted them politely, making small talk with his mother. She seemed to be doing a lot better, although we still weren’t sure of her fate. But we enjoyed having her around for the little bit that was possible. She told us that she absolutely wouldn’t miss Niall’s graduation for anything in the world. I could tell that Niall was consumed with happiness that his mother could be here today, and I was too. Maura was a joy to have around, and I know how much she adores Niall. I’m happy for the both of them that she could be here today.

Liam and his family approached us quietly, his mother and father with smiles on their faces surprisingly. His sisters didn’t look to be too over joyed, but I could still see the hidden grins on their faces.

“Where’s Harry?” I asked as he was usually the first to be back.

“Here.” He replied, a small, almost sad smile on his face as he came back with his mom and his sister who I had met earlier today.

I noticed his father walking away to leave on his own, an unhappy look on his face as he left in a huff. I could safely assume that Harry had tried to convince him to come along, but he clearly didn’t want to be around us, or Harry for that matter. I was brokenhearted for him, knowing what it’s like to have a shitty father. But we all welcomed him in as family, and his expression quickly changed, forgetting about it and realizing that we were all here for him.

“I think that’s all of us.” I said, examining the large group.

“Well then, I think it’s time to make dinner plans.” My mom spoke. “What does everyone feel like?”

The whole group erupted into a loud mess of comments and suggestions all at once. We all stopped at the same time and broke into laughter at ourselves.

“Alright, one at a time.” Louis chuckled.

I giggled and looked up at him as he threw his arm around me. I found myself staring at him in amazement. It was then that I realized, if it wasn’t for this very boy, I would have never made it through. But he held my hand and protected me the entire way, no matter how it affected his own life. And he smiled through it all. He really was amazing to me.

It’s funny. They say that nearly no one leaves high school with the same friends that they started it with. But here we are, Louis and I. Not only was he the first person to be my friend, but in a way, he’s also the last friend I made, considering our rough patch. And not only are we still best friends after all that we’ve been through, but we’re even closer now. I never would have thought Louis and I would end up like this, but in the end, he’s still the person that I cherish the most. He always was. And that’s never going to change.

~

“I got it, babe.” Louis smirked as he took the heavy box I was struggling with from my hands, walking it into the living room and setting it down on floor.

I followed behind him and looked around, taking in the empty space. He wrapped his arms around me and looked down at me with a sweet smile before kissing my lips.

“I can’t believe we have our own place.” I said, still in awe of the sheer size of the flat.

It’s been three months since graduation, and everyone was already settled into their new places. Well, all except Louis and I, of course.

He chuckled and pulled me into him. “Well I promised you that one day we would have our own place, didn’t I?”

“Yeah. I just didn’t think it would actually ever happen. Honestly, I never really even thought about the fact that I wouldn’t live with mom forever.” I laughed. “And now that I’m living on my own, it feels… well, weird.”

“But you’re not on your own. You have me. This is our place. Just the two of us, love. This is our home.” He said.

I smiled at the sound of it.

Our home.

I sighed happily and leaned into him. “I love you.”

His face was lit up by a smile. “I love you the most.” He said, kissing me sweetly.

“Hey, hey, hey!” Zayn’s voice interrupted our moment. “I get that you two are all happy to have your own place and be all coupley and stuff, but would you please leave the kissing and touching for after we leave?” He raised an eyebrow at us, setting down the box of stuff next to us.

We looked at each other and laughed as he rolled his eyes and walked back out.

The guys were helping us move in, as it was a lot of stuff considering it was both mine and Louis’ things. There was a lot, and since the boys lived in the same building, they offered to help.

But this place was amazing. The living room alone was probably half the size of my old house. And the whole place just looked expensive. Well, it was. Louis had paid for the whole thing, even though my mother insisted that she help out, Louis wouldn’t accept any of her money, claiming that it was his job to take care of me now, and that was exactly what he was going to do from now on.

This flat alone had more rooms than my house had. There was a foyer, a living room, a dining room, a kitchen, two bathrooms, a study, a guest bedroom, and a master bedroom with a built in bathroom. It was huge, and I felt as though it was unnecessary, but Louis insisted that I live in a place that was worthy of me. I couldn’t stop giggling when he told me that, but eventually I just let it slide, letting him do what he wanted. If it makes him feel better, then I’m happy to live here. It’s not like I’m complaining.

“After all this time and you guys still haven’t eased up on the mush factor.” Harry joked, carrying in two boxes at a time.

I smirked at him. “I guess it’s just never going to go away.” I joked.

“You better be joking.” He chuckled.

“What are you children laughing about?” Liam asked, coming through the door.

“Louis and I being so sickening with our love for each other.” I answered plainly.

“Oh.” He said, looking at Harry. “Well this is their house now, and they have every right to-“

“Be all lovey towards each other. Yeah, yeah, I know. It’s always you who sticks up for them. You’re so odd, Liam.” He teased, chuckling before walking back out to grab the rest of the boxes.

Liam pulled a slightly pouty face and stared after Harry, then turning to us. “Is that a bad thing? I mean, I’m happy for you guys.”

“No, it’s not a bad thing, Li.” I giggled, giving him a hug. “You’re our cheerleader, and that makes me happy.” I kissed his cheek.

Louis walked over and pointed at Liam’s cheek. “You better wipe that off, mate.” He warned playfully.

Liam laughed and walked away, joining the other boys.

“I was serious!” Louis yelled after him.

I giggled at him as he turned around. “Is someone worried?” I asked.

“No, love. I know you love me. I was only joking.” He clarified, kissing my cheek. “But now you have to give me one.” He said, leaning down and turning his face.

I smiled and placed a kiss on his cheek, his stubble tickling my face. “You need to shave.”

“But you love my stubble. You think it’s sexy, remember?” He reminded me of my earlier words.

I rolled my eyes at the memory. “Well, yes. Nevermind then.”

“Why don’t you two come help us instead of snogging in your new living room, yeah? Plenty of time for that later.” Niall’s voice came from the front door.

We both chuckled and hurried outside, almost forgetting about the work that was going on. And there’s going to be a lot of work going on here before everything is settled. We really had way too much stuff. But I’m not going to lie, the day that Louis took me furniture shopping was great fun. He let me pick out whatever I wanted, and I may or may not have gone a bit crazy. But oh well, it was our first place, so why not?

~

After two weeks of living here, we finally got everything put away and set up just like we wanted. I set the very last touch to the house on the bookshelf. A picture frame. I set it up just right and smiled at the picture within it.

It was the picture of all of us hugging on graduation day, and everyone looked so happy. It was my favorite photo of us. I didn’t realize that I was gazing at it until a loud knock on the door interrupted my thoughts. I turned to get it before seeing Louis dash out from the kitchen, already ahead of me.

“I heard there was a party going on here?” Niall asked from the door.

I giggled at his joking as Louis let him in. “The pizza should be here any minute, drinks are in the refrigerator.” I told him.

“Alright, thanks.” He smiled as he hugged me on his way to the kitchen.

“That’s one.” I said to Louis, smiling happily.

“The others aren’t far behind, I’m sure.” He smiled back.

The boys were always coming over on the weekends. We would all get together and do whatever the hell we felt like doing that night. It was the most fun, and it had become routine since moving in here.

“Okay, mum. Love you too. Bye.” Niall’s accent carried into the room, putting his phone back in his pocket.

I raised my eyebrow at him, curious as to what that was about.

He sat down next to me on the couch with a drink in his hand. “She was worried that I might be out misbehaving again.” He chuckled.

I smiled as I watched him laugh about his mother’s worried ways. He was obviously happier than ever, and I was more than happy to see him like this.

It turns out that Niall’s mom was just fine. She beat the cancer, and she claims to be better than ever now. Niall’s family was happy and whole again. She was extremely proud of Niall, and fully supportive of his love for music, and thinks that going into the music industry is the right choice for him. Yep, Niall was pursuing a career in the music business, and he was very excited about it. Things really turned out good for him after all.

Louis came back in from our bedroom and sat on my other side. “Still not here?” He asked curiously.

As if right on cue, the doorbell rang. I got up to get it and opened the door to reveal Harry. He smiled brightly and hugged me.

“Hello, El!” He said happily.

“Hey, curly.” I smiled, letting him in.

He took my spot on the couch, smirking at me.

“Oh no you don’t! That’s my spot!” I giggled, grabbing his hand and trying to pull him up, even though it felt like he weighed a ton.

He laughed at my weak attempt. “But Louis is my very bestest friend.” He whined.

“Well he’s my man, so…” I gave up and put my hand on my hip.

“Yeah, as much as I love you, mate, you just don’t compare in sexiness.” Louis said, giving Harry a fake sad face.

“Well…” Harry pretended to be offended and got up, moving to the chair.

I giggled at their little show and sat back down in my spot. “So what’s the final news?” I asked, almost forgetting.

“Well, mum is doing better. She’s off the alcohol and eating again. She and dad are both getting counseling separately, but… they’re getting a divorce.” He announced.

There was an instant frown on my face. “I’m so sorry, Harry.” I said quietly.

“No, it’s okay. I think that it’s for the best. Them being together just isn’t healthy, so I think that this is good in the long run. Maybe they can both finally move on and find what, or who, makes them happy.” He said, taking in a sharp breath.

“Well it’s good that you see it in a positive light.” Louis commented, also feeling a bit down for his friend.

“Yeah, I’m trying. In other news, Gemma finally decided to come back home.” He smiled genuinely.

“That’s great!” I almost shouted in happiness for him.

“Yeah. I’ve really missed her these past few years. But after coming home for my graduation, she saw how things were getting better and decided to move back.” He beamed at the thought.

“Aw! I’m excited!” I smiled.

“I think you two will wind up being best friends. She’s basically girl Harry, and you two obviously got along at the graduation, so…” Niall commented

“Yeah, we’re a lot alike. I’m sure she’ll be excited to have a girl to talk to.” Harry told me, rolling his eyes at the thought of girl talk.

There was another loud knock on the door. Harry got up before anyone else could and answered it. I chuckled at him. What a strange boy, answering the door at someone else’s place.

“Hey, buddy.” I heard him say before Zayn stepped in.

He spotted us on the couch and smiled at us as he walked in, making himself comfortable in the other chair.

Before Harry could close the door, Liam appeared.

“Am I late? Sorry if I’m late.” He said, taking a seat on the floor.

“You’re not late, Liam. There wasn’t actually a set time, you know?” I giggled lightly at his politeness.

“Well you said seven-ish. But it’s already past seven-ish.” He stated.

“Oh, it is? I wasn’t aware.” I laughed. “Liam, you don’t make any sense.” I smiled at him.

“Yeah, I know. It’s not like I try anyway.” He shrugged.

I giggled and tousled his hair as I stood up. “Well, since everyone is here, I’ll go make some popcorn and movie snacks for until the pizza gets here.” I said, making my way to the kitchen.

I shuffled through the pantry for the bags of popcorn and put them in the microwave before getting out a few bowls and filling them with various candies.

As I was preparing things, I heard someone walk in behind me and I turned to see who it was.

“Oh, hello Zayn.” I smiled at him.

“Hey.” He returned quietly.

“Something I can do for you?” I asked, tilting my head to the side as I waited for his answer.

“Um, no. I just wanted to tell you the good news.” He gave me that crooked smile and rubbed the back of his neck.

“Good news?” I asked, a cheery tone to my voice.

“Yeah. Um, so it turns out that my father doesn’t want me carrying on his work. He told me that he wants to support me in whatever I choose to do.” He said, his true smile starting to break through.

A grin spread across my face at his words. “Zayn, that’s great! I’m so happy for you!” I leaped over and hugged him in joy.

I knew this was an extremely big deal for him, as the entire weight that he’s bared this whole time has been lifted off his shoulders and now he’s finally free to do what he wants. I was overjoyed for him.

“So, what are you going to do?” I asked excitedly.

“About what?” He chuckled lightly, confused at what I was asking him.

“Your future? What are you going to do? What’s your dream?”

“Oh. Um, I want to draw.” He said sheepishly.

“Draw? You mean you want to be an artist? That’s so awesome! I didn’t know you could draw!” I gushed in happiness.

He laughed at my sudden enthusiasm. “Yeah, a little bit. But it’s just something that I’ve always really enjoyed doing, and I’m at least decent at it. I figured it’s what I should do, you know? If my father is going to support me fully, I might as well go with what I’ve always wanted to do. Maybe I’ll be a comic book artist or something…” He muttered shyly.

“Decent?! I bet you’re amazing at it! You have my full support too! I’m sure you’ll do great with it!” I encouraged.

He shot me a genuine smile, a look of gratefulness in his eyes. “Thanks, El.” He slowly made his way over to me, hugging me again.

“Aww! Zaynie-Bear! You’re all mushy!” I teased, hugging him back.

“Hey, don’t I get a hug?” The Irish accent reached my ears.

We pulled apart and I looked in the direction of the voice. “Of course, Ni.” I gave him a look and a hug as he approached me.

“Careful, Niall. Don’t let you-know-who see you so close with Eilana.” Zayn said, winking as he walked out with a smirk and the bowl of skittles.

I looked back at Niall with a raised eyebrow. “Oh? And just who is he talking about?” I questioned, eager to know the girl mentioned.

“Uh, well I might have met someone a few weeks ago…” He trailed off quietly.

“And you didn’t tell me?!” I scolded. “Niall Horan!” I pointed my finger at him. “I need to know this stuff!”

He chuckled, looking down. “Sorry. It’s not official or anything yet though. We’ll just see where it goes.” He shrugged it off like it didn’t matter.

“Well tell me, tell me.” I put my chin in my hand as I leaned against the counter in interest. “So what’s her name?” I smiled.

“…Rosie.” He bit his lip, trying not to smile at the mention of her.

“Rosie? Oh, she sounds like a doll.” I grinned happily. “And do you like this Rosie, Niall?” I taunted.

His face was pink before I could even finish my sentence. “I do. I like her a lot, actually.” He confessed.

My smile only grew as he talked about her. “And how did you two meet?”

“Well, she works at the bakery down the street from here. You know, the one I always go to for those special cookies? Well she works there and I happen to see her a lot, and, I don’t know, I guess after some time we just started talking when I would drop by, and eventually that turned into us sitting and talking for an hour or two every time now.” He chewed at his nails like he always did when he was nervous or deep in thought.

I could hardly contain the happiness that I was feeling for him. This sounds like the start of a classic love story, and I couldn’t help but smile so wide my cheeks hurt.

“She’s really cool though. I think you would like her. You guys have a lot in common, and she’s really nice. But there’s just something about her that draws me in. I’m not sure if it’s the long conversations we have, or the way her green eyes sparkle when I make her laugh. But I find myself thinking about her at night, and I think that there’s really something there, you know?” There was a small smile on his face as he spaced out at the cabinet in front of him, going on and on about her.

“Aw! Our little Niall is in love!” I teased, hugging him sweetly.

“I am not! …Well, maybe a little. But the point is, we’re not together or anything, just kinda seeing each other. But I think I’m going to ask her out soon. Do you think she’ll say yes?” He asked me nervously, the thought of rejection coming to his mind suddenly.

I giggled lightly and smoothed his messy hair. “There’s not a doubt in my mind that she’s as smitten with you as you are with her. Trust me.” I smiled at him.

His worried expression became a relaxed one once I assured him. “Good.” He smiled. “For a long time now, I never thought I would say this, but, you were right, El. I don’t love you that way after all. When you told me that, I seriously doubted it. As a matter of fact I thought you were downright wrong, but I just went along with it because I knew that you needed to move on. But after meeting Rosie, I realized that you were right. My princess is out there, I just have find her. But that doesn’t mean that you aren’t still very special to me. You always will be, Eilana. You have a special place among the rest of my friends here.” He pointed to his heart. “You have the top spot, El. Don’t forget that.” He hugged me.

I smiled and hugged him back tightly. “You always were the cliché, cheesy one. But you know what? I don’t want it any other way. You always make me feel special with your words, even if they do sound like they’re out of a fairytale.” I giggled.

“Well, good. Because that’s how I am, and it’s not changing anytime soon, darlin’.” He pinched my cheek before walking out.

I carried everything into the living room and set it down, placing myself next to Louis. “Okay, what are we watching?” I asked.

We all looked at each other, as if silently asking.

“I vote for The Avengers.” Said Louis blankly.

Harry immediately pouted. “But we’ve watched that a million times! How about…-“

“The Hangover?” Zayn tried to finish for him.

“No. I was going to say Titanic.” Harry corrected.

“No! Not Titanic! Anything but that!” Zayn protested.

“How about Batman Begins?” Liam suggested.

“If I have to watch that one more time this month, I’m going to go insane.” Niall commented. “What about Grease?”

“I’m fine with that.” Louis spoke up.

A loud protestant groan came from Liam’s direction.

I giggled at the chaos that always came with us watching a movie, and proposed a solution. “What about 21 Jump Street?”

They all made a thinking face and looked about the room.

“That sounds good.” Harry said.

“Yeah, that’s fine.” Niall agreed.

“I’m good with that.” Liam nodded his head.

“That’s always a good one.” Zayn laid back in his seat.

“Good with you, babe?” I asked.

“Yep. I’ll get it.” Louis said, pecking me on the lips before getting up.

Just as everyone had settled down and the movie started, my phone started to ring in my pocket. I quickly dug it out and got up, letting them know I would be right back and to keep the movie going.

I walked out onto the balcony that was off of our kitchen and closed the doors behind me, answering the phone.

“Hello?”

Hey, sweetie! I was just calling to make sure that you’re still planning on going with me to that fashion show next week?

“Yeah! Of course. I almost forgot, though. I need to put it on the calendar.”

That’s alright. I was just making sure. Is everything going alright with Louis and the boys?

“Yeah, everything is great. Everyone’s lives only seem to be getting better as time goes on. I’m actually excited about the future now.”

That’s great, sweetie! If you need anything you just let me know, okay?

“Okay. Thanks, mom.”

Mhm. Say hello to the boys for me alright?

“I will.”

I heard the door open behind me and I turned my head to see Liam coming out and closing the door behind him, a concerned look on his face.

Okay. I’ll see you later then. Love you!

“Love you too. Later.”

I hung up and turned my attention to the boy in front of me.

“Everything okay?” He asked sweetly.

“Yeah. That was just mom. She wanted to remind me about something and see how things were going.” I smiled at him.

His brow became relaxed and his lips formed a small smile. “Ah. Good, then. I was just worried because you came out here that maybe something had happened.” He explained.

“Oh. Nope, all good.” I assured, smiling. “What about you? How are you doing?” I asked, genuinely interested.

He gave a light chuckle and looked down before meeting my eyes again. “I’m doing great, actually.” He nodded.

“And how are things going for you?”

“Surprisingly, pretty good. I finally talked to my parents and we sorted a lot of things out. I think they realized what they were doing to me all these years, and they wound up apologizing for a lot of things. They actually told me they were proud of me for once, and that they’re excited to see what I do with my future. They’re totally supportive of my wanting to be a doctor. It’s great. My sisters and I still aren’t the closest, but we’re working on it. Our relationships with each other are a whole lot better now. It’s not perfect, but it only seems to get better. And now that I’m out of their hair and out here making a living on my own, they seem to treat me differently. For the better, of course. But, things are looking up for me. For all of us it seems. It’s nice.” He smiled, looking up at the starry sky.

“Yeah, it’s a nice change.” I agreed, sighing slowly and giving him a short hug before patting his shoulder and giving him a friendly smile.

“Come on, let’s go watch the movie with those idiots we call our friends.” I joked.

He laughed and followed behind me into the living room, only to find that they had paused the movie anyway, and were arguing with Harry about something.

“What is going on here?” I asked loudly enough to shut them up.

They all turned to me, different expressions on their faces. Harry’s in particular seemed to be a bit pouty.

“Tell them that I’ll make a good singer!” He whined at me.

I smiled at their childishness at picking on him over such a thing. We all knew that Harry could sing.

“Of course you will be.” I confirmed. “And don’t you boys tell him lies. You’ve all said at some point in time that he’s a great singer. He’ll be just as good at it as any of you will be at your job. He’ll be just as good a singer as Liam will be a doctor, or Niall a producer, or Louis a children’s teacher. Now shush.” I killed the argument in a few words, sitting down next to Louis again, who was waiting for me with open arms and a warm smile. “Now can we watch this movie?” I giggled.

“Yes, ma’am.” Louis saluted me, raising the remote and playing the movie.

“I love you guys.” I spoke randomly, feeling the need to say it suddenly.

“We love you too.” They all chorused, their cheesy smiled all aimed at me.

I sighed and smiled to myself, getting comfy against Louis. He held me with a tight grip and kissed my cheek.

“Are you happy, love?” Louis asked me quietly.

“Yes. I couldn’t be any happier. Everything is perfect.”

“And I plan to keep it that way forever. I promise.” He kissed my lips sweetly.

I smiled at him. After all this time, my heart still went crazy for him.

“I love you.” He whispered.

Yeah, everything is exactly as it should be.