Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Anakin Skywalker wasn’t a stupid man despite what other people thought. He wasn’t naive. He knew a lot of stuff, was aware of many things. While he was known for jumping ahead in inopportune times, he knew when to keep his cool. He knew when to put away the brash and unaware boy. They were like two people inside him, and most of the time his reckless nature took over. But right now, he put that person away. Because this was something he didn’t want to mess up: His marriage.

He was leaning against the counter of Padmé’s kitchen, tugging down the sleeve to cover more of his prosthetic arm. While he had gotten used to the arm and didn’t really bother hiding it anymore, it was a nervous habit he had developed. He glanced back at the gold box that was sitting on the coffee table in the living room.

He had found it this morning when he had came to visit. Obi-wan and him had just returned from a mission in the Outer Rim (classified don’t ask) that morning. They had only been a way 3 months, but it had been long time since he had visited Padmé, even before he was sent on the mission. So as soon as he got back, he abandoned Obi-wan to deal with the Council to discuss what happened and he bolted to her apartments with the intent to surprise her. But it turned out as C-3PO explained, she was out in a meeting and wouldn’t be back for an hour. So Anakin resigned himself to wait.

It quickly occurred to him though that, 1, he was not really good with patience and 2, he gave up entirely to easy for his liking. So he starting looking around her apartment. Looking what she had to eat, what she had on her holo, what she had in her closet. And really, some of those dresses were too revealing to his liking but he wouldn’t dare bring it up to her in the chance that he would spend the night on the couch. It was technically not snooping, because well, it was his place too, technically, meaning he had some clothes here, and his toothbrush was in the fresher.

And that’s when he found the gold box. It was sitting on her dresser in front of a gigantic mirror that he knew she used for those dramatic hairdos. It was extremely shiny and Anakin had wandered curiously towards it. He reached for it, but something was wrong about it. He felt it in the Force. It reeked of something wrong and Anakin drew his hand back thinking it might’ve been a threat of some sort. But the Force didn’t have that warning aura that it usually did when he was out on missions. No this one was just…wrong.

He grabbed it and checked around the box, looking for any note, for any sign of something. But he didn’t find anything, so he softly opened it, the lid making a creaking noise as it slid open. He frowned as he looked inside, his finger dipping in and lightly touching the jeweled ring sitting on a cushion. He picked the ring up, turning it around in his hand. Anakin could immediate tell it was her size and he guessed from the box and cushion that it was a gift. It was a pretty ring, and he can tell by the jewel it was expensive. It was a rare one, and he remembered because he had been to the planet where they had exported them. He put the ring back in the box and closed it, putting it back on the dresser. It was most likely from a family member or friend of the senate. He didn’t think anything of it. Until C3PO said something.

“Oh Master Ani how good it is to see you home.”

“Yeah Threepio you’ve been saying that for the past half-hour.”

“Yes well at least you show me some respect unlike that person Mistress Padmé brings around.”
“Person? What person?”

But Threepio had already moved on to another topic and left Anakin pondering. The people Padmé would bring around didn’t seemed to be ones Threepio wouldn’t like. His eyes drew back to the entrance to her room. He wondered if the box was at all related to this person and he tried not to grow suspicious but it really wasn’t working.
The box was out in the open, she wasn’t hiding anything and he was sure if he asked she would give him a good explanation. Right after she chewed him out for snooping. Which was technically not snooping because it was kind of his apartments too.

So he tried to calm himself down again but he was also becoming stressed and the Force was trying to say something or maybe it was his brain. He could never tell the difference between the two of them. All he knew was that something was telling him wrong, wrong, wrong, and he couldn’t do anything about it. So he grabbed the box from the room and set it on the coffee table.

And stared at it.

And contemplated it.

And wondered why he was being paranoid and why he was….why he was being him.

Anakin Skywalker was once again falling into the hole of thinking he was not good enough for somebody. That reckless boy who still needed the attention from somebody, anybody, to make sure they cared for him, that they wanted him there. And the person who always reassured him of that, other than his mother, was Padmé, his angel. And the thought of losing her too, was frankly unbearable.

Wait, wait. Losing her? How would he be losing her? He was jumping to conclusions. Way too fast. He always seemed to do that and Obi-wan always seemed to point it out. Obi-wan always seemed to point something out. And usually it was something wrong he had done. He bet that was Obi-wan’s favorite pass time, sitting around and pondering somebody’s weakness to point them out later. His Master really did need a new hobby.

And that’s how he ended up leaning on the counter of the kitchen watching the gold box gleam from the sun shining through her terrace.

That's how Padmé found him. She entered the room, a trail of women following her all laughing and chatting. She saw him first, and immediately shushed her entourage behind her. Everyone quieted and she cleared her throat.

“Master Skywalker.”

He saw the happiness in her eyes, the joy of him being there. And part of him felt better and resolved even though the Force still sang in sadness. He didn’t know why. It wasn’t important, not then at least. He watched as she dismissed her maidens and they all left with a sly look in their eyes. He knew they weren’t dumb, they knew, or at least thought they knew what was happening between them. But he also knew they had the most utmost loyalty to Padmé. They wouldn’t say a word.

They waited until they door was officially closed and locked before they moved towards each other. If she noticed the box removed from her room, she didn’t mention it. Anakin gently hugged her, wrappings his arms around her tight, not letting go. His worries went away with a touch and the Force finally fell silent. She was perfect in everyway, and being here meant everything to him.

“You shouldn’t sneak in here like that, Ani. What if I brought in someone who would jump to the wrong conclusions or, expose us.”

Anakin frowned as he let her go, finally really looking at her. She seemed tired, and the previous joy he found in her eyes had dulled. She never complained about his surprises or visits.

“Who would you bring around that wouldn’t know me? I mean, they all think we’re good friends anyway. And my frequent leaves on missions would shut down any rumors of something more.”

She only sighed and looked away. But he was determined to not let the evening go to waste, so he swooped and gave a her a kiss, a soft one, because something told him she seemed fragile. When he pulled back, her head looked down. Wrong….the Force whispered, like something was coiling around his neck and talking in his ear.

“What’s wrong Angel?”

She schooled her features fast and if it was anyone other than him they wouldn’t have caught it. But he did.

“Nothing, just the Senate. They are trying to pass a new bill regarding the war and despite my team’s best efforts, it seems it would be passed through.”

“What is it?”

She sighed, setting gently on the couch, curling her legs behind her, “I am sure you will find out soon enough. It will probably announced by the end of the week.”

He followed her, sitting next to her to pull her against him. She leaned against him, soft. So different from him, rough and with calluses who fights everyday in a war. The gold box was still sitting on the coffee table. Padmé still hadn’t mentioned it. He determinedly tried to avoid looking at it, only focusing on Padmé. But it really was distracting and something was really telling him to ask about it. But she was nestled against him, seeming to finally relax and the atmosphere was so peaceful. So he stayed quiet. And Obi-wan said he had no self-restraint. They stayed like that for awhile, Anakin almost getting drowsy, when Padmé finally spoke.

“Why were you looking through my stuff?”

He lifted his head from where he had buried it in her shoulder, in her hair. She was staring at the box on the table. “I wasn’t snooping, I was just…”

He was always bad with words and expressing himself. Most of the time he was already on the defensive. Something he carried with him from his years as a slave. “I just found that in your room, it was sitting on the dresser.”

Padmé shifted away from him slightly, and the Force hummed in discontent. Or maybe that was just him.

“It was a gift from one of the planets the Senate helped recover from the separation of their Separatist government. I was one of the Senators who represented them. They wanted to personally thank me.” She explained this turned away from him. But Anakin felt immensely better and knew that his stupid suspicions meant nothing. He leaned forward to where she was sitting and kissed her shoulder. But she stood up from the couch and moved to the kitchen, and he heard her moving around.

“What are you doing my love?” He asked, following her but not stepping too close. Something was wrong, was severely wrong. The Force was right.

“Where do you think this is going Anakin?”

Not Ani, which meant this was a serious conversation and that she wanted a serious answer. But they had had this conversation before, both agreeing they would see where the marriage would take them. And agreed to talk about it if one of them wasn't happy anymore. Anakin was happy.

He was happy that he was able to come home to a wife that he loved, a woman he would do anything for. He was happy that at the end of every mission and every bloody battle, he was able to come home for her. She was brave and amazing and steadfast in her beliefs. How could he ask for more? But, the question that popped in his head was, was she happy? If she was, he didn’t believe she wouldn’t be asking the question.

“What do you mean?”

“I mean...I mean, what is there for us?”

Padmé had finally turned to face him, her face distressed and he really wanted to go over and comfort her but knew he wouldn’t be reciprocated. So he stood in the kitchen doorway, gripping the side of the wall.

“Are you talking about us being married?”

“Yes Anakin, what else? It’s not like you’re part of my life any other way.” Harsh but true. And she looked like she regretted saying it. But he never knew her to be a regretful person.

He nodded and stepped back from the kitchen and turning to the living room. They had arguments before, but today seemed to be different. The Force hummed in uncertainty and it left him confused because the Force always seemed to be the surest thing about him, the one thing of himself he could trust. But even that was being difficult.

Padmé had followed him out and trying hard to school her features but it didn’t seem to be working. She looked upset. And it pained Anakin greatly so he went and hugged her tight, squeezing her against him. He didn’t know what was happening, didn’t know the cause of her pain, didn’t know how to fix it. But he could try, he could be there for her, because he loved her and she meant everything to him. She was his world. The Force was churning, or maybe that was his brain, in his head.

“Padmé, Angel, tell me what’s wrong. How can I help?”

“You can’t. You can’t help.” Her voice sounded so small and exhausted and muffled by his tunic. “Tell me what to fix.” he said, hugging her closer and tighter.

The answer was a broken sob and he reeled back, shocked because of all the time he has been with Padmé he had never seen her breakdown. Never. She was always so strong and confident. She was like a solid rock against the ocean. But now it seemed the waves were too big for her to handle. He didn’t want her to carry this on her own.

“You can't fix it.” It was a statement backed by a hiccup of sob.

“Why not?” He asked, brushing his hands on her cheek. She pulled away and when he tried to hold on she pushed at his chest. He moved his arms away from her, and watched as she wiped tears on her cheeks. She took a second to compose herself and Anakin stayed silent to watch her. When she was done, she stared at him, a helpless look in her eye. He had never seen her look so vulnerable. Like a her shield was cracked and any rock thrown would shatter it. She sniffled and sat back down on the couch, her hands in her lap. He sat down, but didn’t scoot next to her. She looked like she needed her space.

“Anakin. I lied about the gift.”

He pressed his lips together and looked down. Padmé was hiding something from him. The golden box was still sitting there.

“I made a mistake.” she continued, her gaze downward. He swallowed, and for once the Force was silent. Like it wanted him to face this alone. Because he knew whatever she was going to say, it wasn’t going to be good. It was probably going to hurt.

“What kind of mistake?”

“I did something stupid.”

“Padmé, what happened?”

She looked stricken.

“Angel whatever happened we can fix it, together, it’s probably not as bad as you think.”

“No no no no Anakin you don’t understand. You can’t-it's not-” she stopped talking, putting her hands on her face again. He was hesitant, but he put her hand on her shoulder.

“You’re going to hate me.”

“You know I could never hate you.”

“Stop Anakin please stop.”

“Stop what? I am trying help I am trying-”

“Stop trying! Stop acting like you can fix this! You can’t!”

Anakin stopped. He swallowed. His head hurt.

“Do you mean our marriage?”

He had to ask. Had to because he can’t not knowing if she wants out or not. And it’s devastating. But he’s jumping to soon in a pit of lava.

“No Anakin that’s not what I mean. I…”

She keeps pausing and it’s becoming frustrating and Anakin was ready to shake her to hear what she has to say because he is tired of living in suspense from the moment he saw that golden box.

“Please tell me Padmé, tell me what’s going on I can't help if you won’t tell me, please.”

He was pleading because he needed things to be ok and to go back to normal and for him to have his Angel back and for everything to be alright. But he knew it wouldn't be by the look of resignation on her face. He wish he could unhear the next set of words.

“Anakin I-I made a mistake...I have been with someone else.”

The breath he was holding rushed out of him and everything in his mind came crumbling down. His head hurt and was pounding and the Force was screaming in distress. He was stunned and still, and he didn’t know what to do.

“Anakin, please say something. Anakin.”

He wasn’t aware she was talking, her words echoing through his head. Been with someone else. Been with someone else. Been with someone else.

“Please Ani.”

“You don’t get to say that anymore!”

He lashed out, the anger surging out of him, the gold box from the table shooting out and slamming into a wall. The ring fell out and rolled onto the floor.

Padmé didn’t seem afraid. Only worried and heartbroken and she reached for him. But he moved away from the couch to calm down, to control the anger. “How long?” he asked, his jaw clenching hard, and his voice harsh. She swallowed, her hands wringing. “No Anakin, it’s not a relationship, I wasn’t having an affair, I only…”

She only slept with them. That’s what she was trying to say. She only slept with them. As if that was any better. He finally turned to look at her. She was tearfully watching him and he saw the full front regret on her face. But he didn’t care. She also seemed to be worried about something else. And in the fragile state she was in, her focus was no longer on her shields. It was easier to read her. Her face like an open book. She wasn’t telling him something else. She didn’t want him to ask her something. He stiffened when he figured out what. And he felt sick to his stomach.

“How many times?” he asked, his voice hoarse, and distraught and he didn’t know what to do anymore. Nothing seemed to matter. He glanced over at her again and he saw the look on her face. His chest caved in itself as he knew what the answer would be before she spoke.

“3...3 times.”

“Oh god,” he said, leaning against the wall and rubbing his face with his hands.

His wife had cheated on him. He never thought it would be possible, that it would happen to him. He was so busy with the Jedi Order and the war, it never even crossed his mind his wife would be unfaithful to him. It was the least of his concerns. Maybe that’s why it had happened. He hadn’t paid attention enough. It was his fault. But he could deal with his self-blame at a later time. Because right then he was not in the right mindset to do it. To deal with it. He could feel the room shaking slightly and the Force was rolling off him in waves he could not describe. He needed to leave. Now.

He moved away from the wall, striding over to the balcony where he had left his speeder. And to think he had came for a romantic evening. He could hear Padmé calling his name but it didn’t matter. Nothing mattered. His senses were dulled and muddled and his heart was racing. It didn’t matter. He felt empty. Heartbroken. He felt heartbroken. He gave his heart to a girl he knew he shouldn’t have. All he wanted to do was murder the man who touched his wife. The anger from the apartment was now settling in. And as he neared the Jedi Temple he wondered, what was it all for? Anything he had done with Padmé, any memory was now tainted. And scarred. He was moving in slow motion. The faces of the Jedi as they passed him were all blurred together.

He went into his room, then climbed into his bed. And stayed there. Wondering if his life was always going to be full of failures. And the only person who ever comforted him was a million miles away. He gave his heart when he shouldn't have given it in the first place. He gave it to a woman who he loved too much. He jumped in the lava too fast.

And now he burned.

Chapter Text

It started out with sadness. It was an emotion so dark it was a navy blue painted across the Force in fierce waves. He sat on his floor, his head in his hands as he breathed in and out, the feeling of brokenness rampant in his mind.

Then came the anger. The anger was so strong it seemed to vibrate underneath his skin. The Force around him was hot and stuffy and red, so red.

The emotions within were rapid. He stayed in his room, knowing that every Jedi outside would feel his turmoil. He was barely able to control it now.

She betrayed him. The person who he never thought would hurt him, the person he trusted the most, she devastated him. He didn’t know what to do.

He always had a purpose, whether in the Jedi Order or with Obi-wan, he always knew where he wanted to go. How he would get there was always the trouble, but Anakin Skywalker had never ran out of plans, out of ways to fix things. Until today.
He didn’t know how to fix this. He didn’t how to make things better.

So he sat in his room, staring at the blank wall, everything muffled and waiting for anything or anyone to tell him what to do.

***

Usually, anger took over everything. Whenever he was in a situation where he was tested or in a bad mood his anger came out and directed. It was doing the same now. He raised one of his prototype flyers he had on his desk and watched it as he moved it upward and upward. It went up to almost touch the ceiling, before he closed his fist and the flyer was crushed to pieces in the air. He watched as it dropped to the floor.

His anger was leaking out from behind his shields, he can feel the hot simmer touching the Force. The other Jedi might’ve felt it by now. He didn’t care, or couldn’t bring himself to care. All he thought about was the man who touched his wife. All he could think about was the man who dared to come into the home of his wife. The man who dared touch what was his. His Wife. His Angel. How dare-

His thoughts were interrupted by his comm beeping on his desk. He rolled into a sitting position and looked at the time. He had only been in his room for a full day, but it had seemed like longer. He reached out with the Force to bring his comm towards him. In the back of his mind he could hear Obi-wan complaining about his flippant use of the Force. Part of him, a large part of him wished it was Padmé. Calling to beg for forgiveness, to grovel towards him to declare her love for him.

Another part of him, a hard, bitter part of him wanted to leave her to suffer. Wanted her to feel some pain, to know that he wouldn't come to her, that she would have to do everything in her power for him to even think about forgiving her.

He answered the comm.

“Anakin?”

Anakin sighed, wiping his hand over his face as he leaned his head back.

“Yes Master?”

“Where on Endor are you? I have been looking for you.”

“I was just in my room.”

“You were supposed to meet me in the Sparring Arena.”

“I am not really feeling it Master, maybe tomorrow?”

“You don’t want to spar? Are you sure you’re not Anakin Skywalker known Jedi Knight who, as you put it, ‘dominates the Arena?’”

“I said I didn't want to do it!” He snapped at Obi-wan, but he knew his master could take it. His Master was used to his moods.

“If you say so Anakin. I don’t suppose you would care to get a meal with me, I feel like we both need it.”

Anakin was about to snap a firm answer of no but then thought about it. He knew he only had limited amount of time for a break before he was deployed to the war again. And he might be better suited for battle if he cleared his head. Besides it wasn’t often that Obi-wan asked for downtown together.

“Ok, I’ll meet you out front.”

***

Anakin was slightly surprised that Obi-wan took them outside the Temple for lunch. They walked silently side by side, their robes slightly touching the floor. As soon as he stepped out of his room he had attained a massive headache. His anger had settled at least. It was still there, in the back of his mind. And in his chest. It was like a weight had taken up room right next to his heart, reminding his every second what had happened the day before. If Obi-wan noticed his inner turmoil, he didn’t say anything.

They entered the small diner, Anakin immediately scoping out who was in it, a habit built from the war. Obi-wan merely strode up to Dexter, there was some murmuring that Anakin didn’t pay attention too, and then they both went to a booth, the promise of food making Anakin a little nauseous.

Obi-wan removed his robe before sitting down and Anakin did too, folding it and laying it down on the booth before sliding in.
It wasn’t an awkward silence. They’ve been together far too long for there to be any discomfort between them. But Anakin didn’t know what to say. Normally, he would probably partake in a friendly banter with his former Master or gossip about Jedi Masters. It might be contrary to belief, but Jedi do gossip about each other.

He looked up to see Obi-wan watching him with unreadable eyes. They stayed silent until their food arrived.

“Are you going to tell me what’s wrong?”

Anakin didn’t look up from his food and he didn’t answer Obi Wan. He was afraid that if he did everything would come spilling out and that he wouldn't be able to stop it. While Obi-wan wasn’t the easiest person to talk to, Anakin was vulnerable right now. It would come out like word vomit.

“Nothing’s wrong.”

There. That...that was safe. Obi-wan didn’t pry. He would be satisfied with that answer and go on with his life.
But Obi-wan didn’t seem satisfied with the answer. Maybe he felt the situation was different. Force knew how much Anakin didn’t need this right now.

“Have you spoken to your Padawan?” Obi-wan asked, taking a bite of his food.

Ahsoka. No, he hadn’t seen her, and a full serving of guilt erupted inside him. And anger.

Pure, blazing anger.

He couldn’t do this. He wasn't strong enough. He wasn’t anything. He lost the most important thing in his life, he couldn’t handle anything more.

So he got up and walked away. Obi-wan had enough sense to stay behind.

***

“Hey Snips.” Anakin said, watching as she turned from talking to Barriss Offee. Ahsoka grinned when she saw him, giving a quick goodbye to Barriss before rushing over to him. She had so much light surrounding her. She was so bright. He would taint her. His anger, his hatred, now burning at an all time high, it would destroy her.

But now it meant he needed her more than ever.

“How was your mission? I heard some people talking, they say the casualties were extremely low, almost nonexistent. That seems impossible in this time of war.”

“It was an easy, small mission, and we’re lucky we have a great army. I am glad I can't say the same for the other side.”

Ahsoka grinned up at him. She must have noticed there was something wrong. The Force surrounding him was intense, and struggling to break free. It was only for her that he was containing it.

“Well Skyguy, this is your time to get that well-deserved downtime.” She said this with an exaggerated gesture of her arm and he gave a small smile.

This he could do, he can be a good master for her. He could be a great teacher. It was only a matter of time before he failed that too.

He left her standing there with a promise that he would see her later for a lesson with her new shoto.

He felt a brush from his bond with Obi-wan and he slammed his walls up. He only hoped Obi-wan hadn’t seen anything. He walked to the dojo. Once, long before the war, it was filled with Jedi and their Padawans running through routines and lightsabers clashing together. Now it was silent, only a few Masters with their too young Padawans. He ran through basic moves, progressively getting more difficult as time passed.

He let himself get lost in the movements and pretty soon he was at the highest level with the training bots, destroying and slicing through everything. When the final bot went down he turned off his lightsaber, his chest heaving up and down. He hadn’t even noticed that he started sweating. He turned around and saw a gathering of younglings by the door of the dojo, all watching him in awe.

Normally, he would bask in their hero worship, even give them more demonstrations, taking in their praise. Now, all he felt was bitterness. He clipped his lightsaber to his belt and walked out, leaving behind their lingering stares.

***

Anakin didn’t leave his room for two more days. He stayed in his bed, only occasionally getting up for the fresher. He felt depressed. It wasn’t a new feeling, but this time, it was a million times worse.

He sat down at the edge of the bed, wiping a hand across his forehead. He had a pounding headache, one that wasn't going away anytime soon. His hair dripped down his shoulder, water rolling down his back.

He felt like he lost his purpose, as if nothing mattered anymore. His concentration was broken, his motivation to do anything was gone.

He felt suffocated, as if the only light inside him had been snuffed out and all that was left was a void. He knew people were probably looking for him, or at least his Master was looking for him. He heard the footsteps outside his door.

His Force senses must’ve been so watered down if he hadn’t sensed his Master’s presence outside in the hall.
He heard his door open and then the footsteps to his room. He groaned and covered his head with his blanket because he really didn’t want to deal with Obi-wan right now.

“Anakin?”

The name was both a question and a reprimand all at once, how Obi-wan managed to do it was still a wonder to Anakin. But now he turned over to see Obi-wan standing beside him, looking as pristine as ever. And a bit...worried?

Obi-wan looked around the room, the state of dishevelment and destroyed pieces. He looked back at Anakin.

“How long have you been hiding in here?” he asked.

“I haven’t been hiding,” Anakin said, rubbing his face, “I’m just...resting.”

“Resting? Really?”

“Yeah Master not all of us have the energy to be working all the time.”

“Alright Anakin you were resting. But the Council and I have been trying to reach you for the past hour. We have a mission briefing in 20. Please try to be presentable.”

Obi-wan said this by throwing a tunic at Anakin, who was staring sullenly at him.

“Mission briefing.” Obi-wan stated one last time before walking out.

Anakin sighed as he flopped back in bed.

***

He walked slowly toward the War room, rubbing his forehead. He didn’t lie to Obi-wan when he said he was resting. He knew he had to take some time off before even thinking about getting back to the war or...even giving counsel to his Padawan. But his attempts at rest were futile. All he could think about, all on his mind was Padmé.

He thought about what she was doing, how she was feeling, if she felt any...guilt. It was all a jumbled mess with his head.

He had tried to block it from his mind a couple of times but it always just came back, as if it was a snake worming his way through his mind. Sometimes, he couldn’t breathe.

And the anger, whenever he thought of it, it just made him so angry sometimes the room started shaking. He didn’t know how the other Jedi didn’t notice.

But none of that mattered anymore, he had to get his head in the game, he had to focus now. He had to put all of that behind him. Because now was the time for war, and a soldier, a General, always had to be ready for a fight.

Chapter Text

Anakin entered the mission room, Ahsoka and Obi-wan were already there. He gave Ahsoka a squeeze on the shoulder as he passed by, and she gave him a brief smile. Then he took his spot next to Obi-wan.

“Ok, now we can begin.”

Mace Windu had spoken, his words deep and cutting off any other conversation. Mace drew up a hologram of a temple. He spun it around to show it.

“This is the Temple of Eedit. Located on the planet of Devaron. It’s been there for hundreds, maybe thousands of years. It has been used to train Jedi, and sometimes used for those who have been touched by darkness. it is known to only be of pure light.”

Anakin watched as the temple spun around, looking at all the details.

“It is protected and maintained by Jedi Master Restelly Quist. The temple also serves as a base for the Republic, no one knew where it was located except the Jedi Council and a selected few members of the Senate.”

Anakin looked up from the temple and watched Mace turn off the hologram.

“Now, it has been attacked.”

No one looked surprised, everything was attacked or destroyed in this time of war. Anakin leaned back.

“The temple needs to be secured, it has a history that we don't even know about, knowledge that needs to be protected. We cannot let the Separatists get their hands on it.”

“Agreed,” Obi-wan said, “When do we leave?”

“Now,” Master Yoda said, walking slowly with his cane, “Protect the temple, you must. Attacked, the people are being.”

“And Another thing, we have lost contact with Master Quist.”

“You think she’s been taken?” Anakin asked, speaking for the first time.

“I don’t know, it is a possibility,” Mace said, crossing his arms.

“We’ll find out, Anakin prepare the 501st, we’re leaving within the hour,” Obi-wan said.

“May the force be with you.”
***
“Skyguy!”

Anakin turned from where he was walking with Captain Rex. He gave Rex the datapad he was reading and gave his attention to his Padawan.

“What’s up Snips?”

“I was just wondering, so you know how they said that only the Jedi and the Senate knew the location of the temple? Then how did the Separatists know where it was?”

“They probably attacked the planet and discovered it.”

“But Devaron had been left alone throughout the entire war, why attack it now?”

“I don’t know Snips, Master Windu did say it was also used as a Republic base, maybe they found it that way.”

“Well, then how would they know it was a Republic base?”

“Ahsoka I don’t know. I am not a Seppie I don’t know what they’re thinking.”

“I just find it suspicious.”

“Yeah, I got that.”

They were walking toward the hangar now, Ahsoka still rambling on about the Separatists having eyes and ears everywhere. She wasn’t wrong, Anakin was pretty sure there were spies on both sides of the war. Now though, he had to focus on the mission at hand. They could worry about secret listening microchip devices after the mission.

“Don’t you think so Master Kenobi?”

Anakin finally tuned into the one-sided conversation to see Obi-wan had joined them. Obi-wan looked curious, one hand rubbing his beard.

“It is a possibility young one, it might explain why the Temple, specifically, was attacked.”

“Don’t encourage her Obi-wan,” Anakin sighed, rubbing his forehead.

“Really Anakin I thought you would jump aboard on the chance to discover a mole in the system.”

“I think we should concentrate on the mission. We need to leave soon, we can’t waste any time.”

Ahsoka seemed like she was going to disagree, but Obi-wan cut her off, “No, you’re right. Ahsoka, can you go make sure Commander Cody has everything in order, I want the ships ready to go.”

“Yes, Master,” Ahsoka said, giving what Anakin perceived as a stink eye as she passed by. He gave her a small smile as he watched her go.

“I still think this is worth looking into,” Obi-wan said. Anakin didn’t disagree,

“So what do you want to do about it? Tell the Council?”

Obi-wan smiled, “I am the Council.”

“Haha. I am serious, Master.”

Obi-wan stayed silent for a minute, before saying, “What if you ask Senator Amidala to do a little digging. Nothing outrageous, just...quietly snooping.”
Anakin felt his throat close up and he felt a white flash through the force. He forced himself to let out a breath. “Uh, I am sure…” he stumbled over her name, “I am sure Padme has other things to do than the bidding of the Jedi.”
Obi-wan was watching him, and Anakin could honestly say he looked suspicious.

“It would only be a favor, but if you don’t think she could do it, then we won’t ask it from her.”

Any other time, Anakin would immediately stand up and defend Padme’s honor. He would go on about her strength and her power and her will.
But now he stayed silent and Obi-wan’s attention drifted somewhere else. His chest finally loosened and he felt he can finally breathe.
As he gathered himself, everyone was ready to leave. He followed Obi-wan and Captain Rex aboard the Resolute, only glancing briefly back before heading inside.

***
“Rex, what’s our time of arrival?”

Anakin stood at the bridge of the ship, his arms crossed against his chest.

“0800 sir.”

Rex stood next to him, his helmet clipped on the belt of his hip. They had only been traveling at lightspeed for an hour, but already Anakin was restless and felt the urge to move.
He turned and walked down the bridge, Rex following a few steps behind him before breaking off to go talk to Cody. He headed to the hallway, hoping not to bump into anybody as his thoughts were turned over. He wanted to just hide away in his quarters but he knew he couldn’t. There was still too much to do and he couldn’t afford any distractions right now. He sighed as he made his way to the training arena, he owed a session with Ahsoka.

When he entered, he saw her sitting in the middle of the mats, turning her lightsaber in the air. Her shoto was sitting right next to her. Not wanting to interrupt her he leaned against the wall. She turned her lightsaber a couple of times as if studying it. Her eyes remained closed.

“I don’t understand Master.”

“Understand what Snips?” he said, walking over to the mats. Her forehead was wrinkled in confusion. He sat down in front of her.

“The Force feels muddled as if it’s...confused about something, but, when has the Force ever been...confused?”

“Yeah tell me about it…”

“You feel it too?!” she opened her eyes and leaned forward on her knees.

Anakin turned his head, “Um not exactly, just tell me about it.”

“It’s just muddled.” Ahsoka sighed, sitting back down and looking at her lightsabers. “Maybe it’s a warning of some sort but I can’t really tell.”

“A vision? The start of a vision?”

“I don’t know Master, I can’t figure it out.”

Anakin stood up, then extended a hand out to his padawan, “Well, let’s just run some training with your lightsabers. You’re still sloppy with your left hand.”

“I’m not,” muttered Ahsoka as she took his hand and stood up. She grabbed both her lightsabers, and lit them up, raising them to meet her master’s, but the feeling of warning and confusion didn’t go away.

Chapter Text

“Anakin, we need to talk about what happened at Dex’s.”

Anakin looked up from where he was fixing one of Artoo’s ports. Obi-wan had his lecture face on and Anakin knew that look all too well.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

Obi-wan sighed, then leaned up against the wall. “Yes, you do Anakin. You got bothered by a simple question, and you ran away! You’ve been hiding in your room for the past few days, I want to know what’s going on.”

“I am not your padawan anymore Obi-wan, you don’t have to keep track of everything I do.” Anakin tried to say this flippantly, as if everything was right in the galaxy and as if he hadn’t been emotionally destroyed just a couple of days ago and his heart hadn’t been smashed in and broken. But the words came out small, and helpless.

Obi-wan looked at his hands before looking back at him, “You’ll always be my padawan Anakin.” He paused and gave a small smile, “ I’ve invested too much into you to let you tear yourself apart.”

Anakin stopped working on Artoo and looked up at Obi-wan. While Obi-wan had in the past shown he did care about Anakin, he never had said it so blatantly before. He must have been really concerned. Anakin felt the urge to spill everything to him, to tell him about his marriage, Padme’s infidelity and his anger. But he knew he couldn’t. So he stood up from Artoo, who gave a small noise, and touched Obi-wan on his arm.

“I am fine, Master, really. Just been feeling down this past couple of days. Guess this war has finally been getting to me.”
Obi-wan didn’t look like he believed him but nodded. “Make sure you’re prepared when we land.”
Anakin lifted his hand off Obi-wan, and left the room, leaving Obi-wan and Artoo behind to contemplate.

***

“We’ll be landing in an hour, sir,” Rex said, his helmet clipped to his belt. Anakin didn’t respond, only watched as they were slowly coming out of hyperspace."

“We’re coming up on the other side of the planet right?”

“Yes, sir. They won’t be able to see us, but if their scanners are on, they will notice us.”

“The Separatist might not expect us to come anytime soon. They might think Devarn is the least of our concerns right now.” Anakin responded.

“No,” Obi-wan said, standing next to Anakin watching the holograph of the planet spin around, “A Jedi Temple with a
missing Jedi Master is at the top of our concern, they know we’re coming.”

Anakin smirked, crossing his arms, “Then we’re expecting one hell of a welcome party.”

Rex huffed, “And we know how much you like crashing parties, sir.”

***

“Senator Amidala, it is a pleasure to see you here!”

Padme Amidala nodded respectfully at Senator Mas Amedda, sitting herself down on the red chairs of the chancellor's office. It was supposed to be a brief meeting but she knew, based on the people showing up, that it would go on long. She wasn’t prepared mentally for the debates and arguing and snide comments that were going to occur. A headache was knocking her head as if her brain was letting her know that it wanted out. It’s ok brain, she wanted out too. At least they were both in it together.

“Padme.” The warm, familiar voice finally brought a small smile to her face and she looked up at Bail Organa. He extended his arms out for a hug and she gently went into him, letting him hold her for a few seconds before pulling away.

“It’s really good to see you Bail, it’s been a while.”

Bail smiled as he sat down into the empty seat next to her, “Well all my invitations have been declined for the past week, I am sure you’ve been very busy.”

Padme smiled before looking down at her hands.

Finally, Chancellor Palpatine silenced the chatter in the room as he rose to begin the meeting. “I am sure you are eager to hear what today’s topic will be about, but I am afraid there has been a turn in events. We were going to discuss some dealings with the Jedi but it seems they are preoccupied with an attack on one of their temples off-planet.”

“I wasn’t even aware the Jedi had other temples to practice their magic!” A senator tittered and others politely laughed with her.

“Not to worry though,” Palpatine continued, “the Jedi have sent their best team on it. Master Skywalker and Master Kenobi have already been sent. But that’s all we’re going to say on that because, as they put it, it’s ‘Jedi Business.’ Now onto our own business…”

Padme had lost her breath when she heard her husband’s name. Her heart tore itself to several pieces and was now scattered across the room.

“He didn’t say goodbye…”

“Did you say something?”

Padme looked up to see Bail leaning towards her. “Oh no I didn’t say anything. Just thinking.”

Of course, she was thinking, she was unable to do anything else. She normally wouldn’t allow herself to let frivolous emotions get in the way of her job. Her work came first, there were people, her people counting on her to make the right decisions, to make the right calls. Other senators relied on her advice, she was held at high expectations.

But at this moment, she couldn’t do all that. All that was on her mind was Anakin. She knew it would have been difficult to tell him the truth, but he deserved to hear it nonetheless. It just hurt her so much to cause him pain of any kind. She sighed, looking down at her hologram to give her the time.

“And that would conclude today’s meeting. If there are any questions or concerns regarding the 234 Election Bill please let me or Senator Amedda know…”

Padme stood up with the rest of the senators before heading out the door. She had a whole list in her mind that she had to finish that morning. Queen Jamillia was having problems with her new advisor and was looking for a solution from Padme, then there was the new draft of the Peace Option list that she still had to go over. And the most important, how to get Anakin to forgive her even if she didn’t deserve it. She wouldn’t know what to do if he never talked to her again she would
lose everything in her heart and-

“Padme!”

Padme swiftly turned back to whoever called her name. Mon Mothma and Bail were both looking at her curiously, albeit concerned.

“Bail, Mon, I didn’t hear you calling me.”

“It’s alright, Padme, we were merely going to ask if you wanted to go to lunch with us.”

Right. Well, she could refuse and go wallow in depression in her apartment. Or she could go and talk politics with Mon Mothma and Bail Organa while sipping expensive tea. She really did need some downtown.

“Lunch would be lovely.”

Chapter Text

The fight wasn’t going well. They hadn’t expected two whole fleets of Separatists to be guarding the planet. The Resolute was taking heavy fire. Anakin had already sent Gold Squadron and other ships out, but they were going to lose the battle if they didn’t act soon.

“Pull us back, call everyone back!” Obi-wan said, steadying himself on the controls of the ship.

“We shouldn’t run.” Anakin said, eyeing the red shots firing against the black galaxy, “They’ll know they have us beat.”

“We need to regroup, we hide behind the planet until we can come up with a plan.” Obi-wan nodded at Admiral Yularen who was giving the order for everyone to return to the ship.

“Will they follow?” Cody asked.

“No, they merely seem to be blocking Devaron, they are not advancing.”

“We need a plan. And fast,” Anakin said as all of the surviving ships followed the Resolute behind the planet.

“We could send in a ground team, secure the planet first,” Rex brought in.

“No,” Obi-wan said, “even if we do take back the Republic base and the temple, we would never make it out. That blockade is too strong.”

“Do we call for reinforcements?” Ahsoka said, finally speaking up.

“We can’t. It’ll take hours before the Council can send ships out here, we’re spread too thin as it is.”

Anakin studied the hologram of the planet. “They can’t see us right?”

“No sir,” Rex replied, “Only through their scanners.”

“Then we used that to our advantage.” Anakin zoomed the hologram out to display more of the galaxy. “We make it seem as if we’re still here, hiding.”

“And where will we go?” Obi-wan asked, crossing his arms over his chest.

“We sneak around the planet,” Anakin said, moving his finger as he was speaking, tracking the ship’s directory, “And come up around them from the other side. They wouldn’t be expecting us to…”

“To what Anakin?” Obi-wan asked.

“To hide behind a star,” he said, small and thinking.

“You gotta be kidding,” Ahsoka snipped, crossing her arms over her chest, “How do you expect to pull that off?”

“Simple, with my unmatching and worthy piloting skills,” Anakin replied, already set up a course for the ship.

Obi-wan felt a headache coming on. “Anakin, this plan of yours is not going to work. The ship can only withstand so much heat before the hull melts and we all die from radiation exposure.”

“You think too much Obi-wan.”

“And you don’t think at all, Anakin.”

But Anakin was already moving forward, “Send a ship out with its beacon so they can see it on their scanners. And we turn on the cloaking on this ship as we slowly move around Devaron.”

Obi-wan put his head in his hands. “This is never going to work,” he muttered.

“Have faith Master,” he said, putting steering the ship slowly around the other side of the planet. Everyone held their breath as they watched him maneuver the ship.

“Ok,” Anakin said, “release the bogey ship. Make sure it has the tracker on.”
Admiral Yularen nodded and gave the command to the clone. The ship was launched behind them.

“And turn off our tracking,” Anakin said.

“To do that you have to…”

“Shut down the ship.” Anakin turned around and looked at all of them, “I know.”

“I sincerely hope you know what you’re doing,” was the final comment by Obi-wan before the ship went dark. Everything was silent. They were dead weight floating in space. Nobody moved a muscle as they slowly drifted off.

“We should be fine as long as we’re as we stay on course.”

“It’s space, how much on course are we going to be?” Ahsoka deadpanned, but she was watching dutifully as they made their way around the planet.

“Can we send scouts down? To scope out the area?” Anakin asked, looking up from the navigation system.

Obi-wan silently thought about it for a minute

“Possibly. They will be able to see it when it goes down."

"So we provide a distraction."

"How?" Ahsoka said, watching as they slowly drifted, the stillness of everything becoming a bit unnerving.

"When we make it around the star, we open fire. They won't realize where we are so we'll have the element of surprise, even if it's a small one. That way we can send a ship down without too much trouble." Anakin glanced at his old master who looked deep in thought.

"There is only one chance of sending a ship down." He stated, studying the planet they were going around. The star they were going to hide behind was ominously getting closer. Anakin nodded but didn't say anything, that way Obi-Wan can come up with his conclusion and he can say it was his plan and no blame can fall on him. It was foolproof.

"Then we'll have to be on that ship." Obi-Wan finished.

Anakin smiled but stayed silent for a couple of seconds before looking towards Rex.

“Get a ground team prepared, only the best Rex, we’re going to need all the luck this time.”

“Yes, sir.”

“Ahsoka I’m going to need you to stay on the ship.” Ahsoka frowned and opened her mouth to speak-

“I’m going to need someone I trust up here. If something goes wrong, I’m going to need you to take control of the situation. I won’t be able to help.”

Ahsoka closed her mouth and pressed her lips together, her eyes telling her how unhappy she was about that idea. But she didn’t say anything and Anakin took that as a success. He stood up,

“Come on Obi-wan, we need to be prepared. We don’t know what we’re going to be seeing down there.”

“Hm yes,” Obi-wan stroked his beard for a second before following Anakin to the elevator shaft to take them down to the hangar.

“You’ll be prepared when we land?” Obi-wan asked quietly.

“Of course Master, I checked all the gear and the ship before we left-”

“I mean mentally Anakin,” Obi-wan interrupted, “I can feel something weighing heavily on you. Whatever it is, release it in the Force. We can’t afford any distractions right now.”

Anakin didn’t say anything but Obi-wan turned to him, his eyes sincere, “You know, you could always speak to me, about anything. But right now, this is our priority. Devaron needs our help. Do you think you can do this?”

Anakin could only nod before the doors to the elevator opened and they both stepped through. Obi-wan was right of course. He couldn’t afford anything holding back right now, especially the thought of the wife he wasn’t supposed to have.

All that mattered was the mission. All that mattered was Obi-wan, Ahsoka, and his men. So he took a deep breath and emptied his head.