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“Well, well, well… if it isn’t Metrocity’s favorite reporter: Miss Roxanne Ritchi.” The dark hooded figure sat in the large black leather chair; the glint of his steel knuckles giving away his position. “We meet again.” The creature stood up with more flashes of steel gleaming from his large spiked breastplate. The only sound accompanying him was the soft blue silk cape as it dragged along the floor.
“Megamind.” Roxanne said his name like a curse. “What do you want with me this time?”
“Oh just the usual, your screams…” Motioning nonchalantly with a wave of his hand, he slowly sauntered towards the halo of light that surrounded the kidnapping chair. His gate brought him into an even creepier shadowed mass, thanks to the wide high collar, and then stopped just in front of her legs. One largely-spiked leather gloved hand shot out to tightly grasp her chin as he menacingly leaned down.
“…and your lips.” Megamind captured her mouth in his own in a painfully forced kiss; his goatee scratchy. Roxanne made sure not to react and kept her face blank just like every other time he greeted her this way. She wanted to scream, not in terror but disgust, and yet she knew that he would enjoy it. Instead, the thirty year old reporter tried to distance herself from the moment.
Thankfully, the uncomfortable experience was over just as quickly as it started. Megamind stepped back to tower over her, looking smug as usual, and squinted his acid green eyes past his knifelike nose. “It’s such a shame that you never enjoy our little… encounters.” He started to circle around her; evil laugh following his movements. “I’m starting to think you don’t like me.”
“You’re disgusting. I would never want anything to do with you. ”
“Ah… my sweet Nosy Reporter, you wound me.” Megamind made a mock hurt motion clutching at where a heart would be located on a human. “Surely you might change your mind after I showed this…” His voice traveled up a pitch as he swung around, remote control in hand, pushing the red button to lower a large flat screen from the ceiling.
Roxanne snorted.
“Find something ah-muss-sing, Miss Ritchi?” Glaring, he turned his impressively bulbous head and inadvertently showed off a majority of the dark blue scars that ziz-zagged across his cranium.
It wasn’t the first time Roxanne’s mind thought they looked like lightning bolts - wondering if it was intentional that the old wounds matched his costume. Shaking the odd thought from her mind she straightened in her chair, wishing for once to listen to the smarter part of her brain and stop wearing so many dresses. The current one was a sassy red number with a cinched waist and detailed with black accents. Basically, it wasn’t meant for her captor or to keep the chill off her knees.
“Must you have to dramatize every detail of our meetings?” She made her voice flat, bored and blew a stray strand of her pixie cut bangs away from her face. “You really like to lay it on thick don’t you?”
“Miss Ritchi?” He drew up a finger, tick-tocking his tongue along with the no-no gesture. “The only thing I intend to… “lay on thick” is your eventual submission to my person.”
“Gosh, never one to be blunt.” Roxanne mocked him, her inner voice screaming at her to stop, telling her that one of these days he really would act on one of his huskily-worded innuendos.
“On my word as a genius, Madam, like the rest of my hardware…” His free hand brushed an overly large spike on his shoulder guard. “…my vocabularies along with my mass-cull-inity are… finely honed.”
She wanted to snort again at his excessive cape flourish. In the moment, he looked more like a deranged pea-cock (pun intended), than a dangerous Super Villain. Roxanne tried to keep her eyes on him as Megamind slinked up behind her, the remote held out at her side with his thumb hovering over the trigger to his latest scheme. For once, she listened to the screaming voice in her head that told her to keep her mouth shut and let him continue with his monologue.
“You see my dear captive, my poor pitiful human creature…” He watched in earnest as her face reddened at the insult. “…this particular end-ev-vor of mine is meant for you, to enlighten you to an entirely new level of this quaint little game we play.” Hearing the quick panicked intake of breath from his prisoner Megamind’s sharpened teeth glinted at her; capped incisors shining silver. “Now without further delay how about a little entertainment?” He chuckled evilly as he pressed the button and the large screen lit up in front of them both.
…
The blank screen zipped on to what appeared to be an alleyway barren of life, the video taken at an angle so one could see the street. At first Roxanne thought the devious deadly villain, who stood no more than two inches from her shoulder, had set her up for a rag. He liked to mess with her, usually after a round of banter, to once again shove her into being a ploy.
He just loved figuring out new ways to throw the “damsel” into one of his many deathtraps. The kind of traps where she sometimes didn’t always make it out unscathed. Some of her scars included: the one on her neck from the spinning razor, the bite marks on her lower leg from the crocodile attack, the chunk of skin shredded off after the boot-wheel of death…
There were other times that she’d had only her hair singed, clothing ripped in an un-modest way, being nearly drowned, frozen, or suffocated. They weren't flukes or fakes and if it hadn’t been for Wayne Scott, her long-standing boyfriend, aka Metro Man the city savior, she would have been killed after her very first encounter with the infamous “Master of All Villainy”.
Only a few minutes in, did the image of the one & only man Roxanne completely trusted in her life popped up on the dimly recorded video. Holding her composure Roxanne sat straight even as she felt Megamind puff out hot air over her cheek in an anticipated sigh. Roxanne wondered what had the insane evil genius so excited, yet backtracked against the thought; not wanting to know.
“Look carefully, Lovely.” He said directly into her right ear.
Roxanne shifted uncomfortably away from his closeness and kept her vision on the video feed. She watched as Metro Man made his way into the alley, avoiding the garbage by floating to keep his white boots clean, and stopped just behind the dumpster. Her eyes widened as she noticed a woman emerge from underneath the camera, both mutely talking to one another. Roxanne rolled her eyes & promptly forgot to keep her mouth shut.
“He’s obviously trying to talk her out of whatever criminal activity she’s in.” Roxanne turned her head just enough so that she didn’t touch the blue chin hovering directly over her shoulder, but also enough to give her captor a well-practiced side eye. She couldn’t see Megamind’s eyes from this angle, but the villainous smirk surrounded by his trademark “devil’s” goatee sent a shock of ice down her spine.
“Ah, quite sure of your trust in him, hmm, Ms. Ritchi? Quick, the best part is coming up!” His gloved hand came up to forcefully tip her chin for the second time that day.
Refocused on the screen Roxanne watched in mounting horror as the woman got to her knees in front of her long-time boyfriend and began (what Roxanne would label in her head) part of the woman’s “job”. She watched, wide-eyed and barely breathing as Metro Man – Wayne Scott – received a blowjob from some prostitute on the street. Distantly her mind recalled all the conversations about them waiting for marriage; how he’d been so adamant that they saved themselves for their wedding night. Roxanne’s eyes took in all of the Super Hero’s facial expressions as though she’d swallowed poison.
In a way she had.
The tape went on for a good twenty minutes, the video switching off just after the Hero tossed several bills at the woman before disappearing, and everything in Roxanne’s life came to an end. She sat stunned; if her captor had been talking she wouldn’t have been able to hear him over the ringing in her ears. The shock had her glued to the seat.
It was then that the blacked out lair was thrown from darkness into light. Roxanne blinked rapidly in surprise. Megamind always had her surrounded in darkness when brought directly to his secret hideout. She was never able to get a good look, but now she got an eyeful.
“Ta-da… what do you think, Ms. Ritchi?”
Overwhelmed with emotion, Roxanne would have normally jumped in excitement to see the bits & bobs that made up the room she so often found herself captured in, but in this instance, the sight of everything was glossed over. Blurred by the tears in her eyes. She could barely face Megamind.
“What! No sassy comments? Not one line of banter?” He mocked. “Shame, shame, shame.”
With the lights full blast she could see him, fully. Roxanne wondered if he might possibly be less scary in the dark. She could see the De-Gun properly – the setting on De-Story; her lips trembled.
So this was how she died.
“Now I know what you’re thinking-”
“Really? Another new alien power comes to light?” Roxanne insulted him and played the pun all while cutting him off. So if she was going to lose her life today she’d at least try to stand up to Megamind’s infuriating self-importance.
“Oooh, yes! Finally, there’s the feisty wit I’ve come to look forward to!” His smile was more of a leer. “Well, down to business.” Megamind hopped back into his ridiculous swivel chair covered in leather & spikes and pushed his way back over to his captive. Stopping in front of her, his legs spread apart touching the kidnapping chair, he leaned his elbows on his knees.
The smile that split his blue face was maniacal and the captive reporter could only lean back so far herself. Megamind's eyes were so wide Roxanne could see the entirety of his pupils - green eyes shining near neon - beckoning her own to stare back. In moments like these Roxanne wondered if things could have been different. He could have been good, perhaps a Hero himself had life given his intellect a chance, but he’d been knocked down too many times. Trusting in humanity had left him near death, as he’d soliloquized once to her, and any compassion he might have had was only reserved for his loyal Minion.
“Business, as in …? Are you going to start… what? Promoting ah, oh, I don’t know, Frequent Kidnapping Card?”
“Cute idea, but I’m afraid after today I won’t be kidnapping you, indefinitely.” He said seriously, mouth a grim line & eyes becoming a sharp squint.
“Ar-Are you joking?” Shocked, Roxanne gaped.
“Mmm, Ms. Ritchi, you know I never joke.” His eyes traveled to her open mouth. Reaching out with his hand he gently closed it. “I have a …prop-pois-ition for you.”
Roxanne physically felt the air leave her lungs as the tips of man's ears turned pink, a similar flush gracing underneath the scars on his nose & cheeks. She could only stare as his eyes glanced to the floor in an almost shy sort of gesture. This was not the blue alien maniac she’d come to associate every other week, but a being altogether different.
“You see, Ms. Ri-Ritchi.” Megamind’s voice stumbled and managed to look embarrassed. “I, well, see- the tape, and…”
When Megamind looked up at her it was as if Roxanne was looking at an entirely different person. His mental shields were down; leaving him open. Eyes wide that managed to look innocent despite her knowing his kill count.
Roxanne took a deep breath.
“Ah-ha-haaa-um, as you can see he – Metro Man – has cheated on you.” His thick eyebrows, one missing a good chunk out of it, frowned. “Wayne Scott, the HERO – the man you’ve been dating for four years, your (yuck) fiancé has cheated on you.”
“Ye-Yeah, so you’ve pointed it out.” Her head gestured to the ceiling where the flat screen hung. “What’s your point Megamind?”
Megamind looked annoyed. “Have you not noticed that over the last year your beloved Beau has taken his precious time getting here? Never understood why you keep leaving my …inventions with more & more …con-trib-ulutions?”
“No.” She faced away from him.
“Muhahahahaha… my Dear Rose. Don’t lie to me.” He leaned in more, the blush from earlier getting darker. “Admit it, my Beauty, he wanted me to kill you! To him, you’ve become baggage. He doesn’t want a wife.”
Roxanne’s head twisted around to stare him down, opening her mouth to protest.
“I do.” Megamind stated; his face nearly purple in color.
Her mouth snapped shut.
“Marry me, become my Evil Queen.” It wasn’t a question.
It took Roxanne a moment to fully process since her mind was still on the video. So lost in thought she didn't notice the rope that tied her to the kidnapping chair loosened. In her mind she began berating herself; wondering what went wrong. Perhaps she should have shed her morals and then Wayne wouldn’t have - but no, that wasn’t how it worked.
"How do I know this isn't some sort of trick? What proof do you have other than your sketchy word & some doctored footage?"
"You want more proof? How's this for proof?" Stalking past her chair with a flourish he went to stand next to a large monitor with a glowing red button on the console. The red glow contrasted with his face making him appear demonic. Slamming his hand down on the trigger the curtains behind the monitor parted.
Roxanne's neck craned to catch sight of Metro Man kneeling on the floor, a dome of light surrounding him. Squinting she could see concentration straining his face. Her mouth felt dry as she considered calling out to him; heart constricting at the sight.
"Perhaps you'd like an "in person" confession?" He circled the dome of light with a predator’s grace. "Eh, Hero? Care to explain to the succulent Ms. Ritchi why you've practically left her to rot in her kidnapping chair?"
"..."
"Ah, the strong silent type! We can't have that now, can we?" Megamind un-holstered the De-Gun & fired.
For a single moment, Roxanne confided in the knowledge that no harm would come to the chiseled Hero, safe that even the De-Stroy setting couldn't harm the muscled super. Yet, a scream of pain echoed throughout her ears as Metro Cities finest buckled over. Then she was standing, already halfway across the room, as Roxanne watched the blood rapidly spread over the beige super suit.
"Hahahahahaha... oh what joy! No longer so pre-ssti-ne-"
"STOP!" Her voice sounded shrill, fragile, and not at all brave. "What have you done to him?"
"Him? Nothing much, Ms. Ritchi, I've only recalibrated this dome to mimic the same atmosphere identical to that of Metro Mahn's home planet."
"Yo-You..."
"I've made him venerable, yes." Megamind threw his head back & laughed. "It took a considerable amount of effort, but now Mr. Tighty-Whitey is no more super powered than a member of the Metrocity’s Police force."
Roxanne's mouth went dry. It was as if she could see the life draining from the man she once held so dear. The De-Gun was forcibly shoved into her shaking hands.
"As much as I would love to personally finish my nemesis off... I'm feeling rather benevolent." He shifted so she could feel his breath on her ear. "I would love to see you get revenge on the man who not only cheated on you, lied to you, but also would have let you die at my hands. Had I not been my Incredible Handsome Genius Self you'd be dead."
"Is that supposed to reassure me? I could just shoot you instead." Her gaze met his and for a heartbeat, they stared one another down. Roxanne didn't move, the gun slipping from her grip as Megamind began trailing his gloved hand down her arm.
"You really are too good Miss Ritchi." Megamind pulled back from her face to look her over. Puffy eyes from crying, a handful of small scars over her otherwise beautiful face (his doing), and her paling completion made him (not for the first time) wish they'd met differently.
Swiftly, he took the gun back.
"NO!" Roxanne shifted away from her captor. "You can't kill him!"
"Oh? And why not my Fair Lady?"
"B-Because if you do I'll never-"
"You'll never what, Roxanne?" He used her name for the first time in the five years their hellish relationship started.
"I’ll never become your Evil Queen."
"According to you, and I quote: "You’re disgusting. I would never want anything to do with you. ” Ring a bell?"
"Please just don't kill him..."
"I will admit I'm amazed that after everything - all the years of being the damsel in distress included - I never thought that - even after him risking your life - you still choose to take the higher ground."
"It’s the right thing to do."
"Ha, yes. Lucky, that I plan on retiring the Super Villain game."
"What?"
"Shocked? Yes, it’s true. It just isn't any fun, especially if the hero is..." Megamind looked down at Metro Man with disgust. "...lacking. Besides, I've come to dislike trying to kill you, and I have no desire using such a petty threat. Metro Man life isn't worth forcing your hand."
"So what are you saying?"
"I'm leaving. I'll let your ...man live, but the evidence (blackmail) of his transgressions will be surrounded by the gravity chamber and a bomb. So should Mr. Goody-Goody try to retrieve the video & pictures he'll be spread out in more ways than one (heh-heh) - thus ensuring my & Minion's freedom."
"But- You-" She stuttered stepping towards him; wanting but not willing to ask about where she fit in his new scheme.
"I'm not going to force you, Roxanne. If you wa-want me: come with me. I'll never kidnap you again, but I'll make sure that you have my protection from him, should he decide to scrounge up the balls to finish another man's murder."
Roxanne's jaw dropped open as he glided past her.
"I'll be gone in the next twenty minutes. The Gravity Dome's shut off switch is labeled over on the third panel." He paused, shifting as if uncomfortable. "Tend to him, I know you will, and if... if you wish to try a different path in life - perhaps I can provide." With a flick of his cape, Megamind walked to one of the walls and pressed his hand to a control panel. Wide-eyed Roxanne watched as he gave her a quick glance over his high collar.
And then he was gone.
Wasting no time she went and turned off the gravity machine that turned Metro Man "breakable". Once the machine shut off, the hero both collapsed and began floating as his body re-adjusted to the Earth's atmosphere. Grabbing hold of his shoulders to keep him from floating away Roxanne began examining the damage. The cape he wore had been torn so she used it to make a makeshift bandage even though the wound was quickly healing on its own.
"Stop." His voice was gruff.
Roxanne continued wrapping the closing hole on his shoulder.
"Roxie-"
"I should hate you."
"Yes, I suppose you should..."
"I- Why, Wayne?"
He sighed. "I don't know, it just seemed easier-"
"Easier? Are you kidding me? What, EASIER for you to let him KILL ME than to tell me you no longer wanted me? You couldn't ask to break up?!"
"You know how I feel about confrontations!"
Taken aback by the excuse Roxanne narrowed her eyes. "Funny, you didn't mind that "confrontation" during your "rescue" in that alleyway."
The silence was deafening as Roxanne finished cleaning up Metro Man's nearly-unneeded medical attention. Finally done she wiped the blood (of a man who shouldn't be able to bleed) on her red dress and watched as the colors blended. Cool professionalism set her face cold as she got up & stepped away from the man she'd pictured being her husband & father of her future children. Instead, she got bloody clothes, scars, & an offer she was seriously considering.
"Are-Are you going to go with him." He wouldn't look at her.
She shrugged; the action much more casual than she felt. "I... I don't feel safe with you anymore Wayne."
"And you think you'll be any better off, SAFER, with him? He tried to kill you every other week!"
"Yeah, but a little F.Y.I. for you, METRO MAN. I knew what was going to happen. When Megamind says he's going to kill me, he means it-"
"Exactly!"
"Don't interrupt me." Roxanne took a deep breath to calm her nerves for what was coming next.
"Megamind doesn't usually make the "right" choices, but when he tells you he's going to do something, he does it. If he says he'll blow up a bank - he does it, if he says he's willing to give an interview - he'll hold off his escape from jail, and if he says he's quitting the "Super Villain Game" as he calls it... well I believe him."
"You can't be serious." Metro Man scoffed. "He's the Villain, he's Evil, and he's tried to kill you more times than I can count."
"True, but at least he's been upfront about it! He's never once lied to me!"
"Roxanne… do you even hear what you’re saying? Megamind's a MURDERER!"
"And so are you, Wayne."
Metro Man's mouth opened only to have no sound come out.
"The only difference is that you've been lying to me for- who knows how many years..." She refused to cry. "I- I'm so sorry that things came to be this way. I truly did love you, Wayne, but I can't do this. Not knowing that you would've let me die." Tears slid down her face as she turned away from the tarnished hero and began to make her way towards the same wall Megamind used to make his exit.
"Roxanne-"
Silently, she paused as her hand hovered over the pad, ready to open the door.
"I'm sorry - for what it's worth, and... maybe... if anyone could turn ...someone around - it’s you."
"Goodbye, Wayne." She took a deep breath & kept in all the words she wanted to say.
"Bye, Roxie."
The door slid open & the weathered news reporter slipped through.