Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

June 2007, University of Chicago.

--

Ben sighed into Paige's mouth, as her tongue swirled around his. Her small hands rubbed up and down his back as he caressed her hair, her back, her neck... Their kiss was far beyond the boundaries for a curb at eight in the morning, but he didn't care. They were both leaving behind the best sex in their lives and he would make the last kiss count. His hands were groping her ass and his tongue was practically down her throat as a loud honk sounded next to them.

He pulled away nonchalantly, lips red, as the window of a gold Honda CRV rolled halfway down, exposing a clearly annoyed woman he assumed was his ride to New York. "Hey, sweetheart," he deadpanned to the girl, unaffected by her presence. She rolled her eyes. Paige was more embarassed, leaning into the window and exchanging hello's with her old friend.

"Thanks so much for agreeing to do this, Rey. Sorry about that, by the way. I guess we'll... miss each other," Ben overheard Paige as he grabbed his bags and started loading them into the trunk.

"Oh, don't worry about that. I sometimes forget how loud my horn is." She laughed, but Ben rolled his eyes. He noticed her accent, and it confirmed his theory that Hux had piloted: all Brits are assholes.

He closed the trunk, strode over to Paige, and shot a glare at Rey. Paige looked into his eyes. "Have a safe trip."

"I'm gonna miss you. Come here." They were kissing again, and maybe for too long, because Rey coughed a bit too loud.

He finally pulled away. "I'll call you," he uttered to her and slid into the passenger seat. "Are you ready?" Rey asked.

"Uh, yeah."

She started the car, he waved to Paige, and suddenly his life at college was over.

--

"So, uh, how do you know Paige?" he asked her after a few minutes of silence, which he assumed they both used to process that adulthood was beginning.

"We were floormates sophomore year." After a pause, "How did you two meet?"

"Uh..bar? I think?"

Rey chuckled.

"What?"

"That was just quite a passionate display for someone you met at a bar."

"Well, that's where we met, that doesn't say anything about our relationship. We've dated for eight months, but I guess it was doomed from the start since we didn't meet somewhere more traditional. Tell me, how long was your last relationship?"

"Jeez, I'm sorry."

Rey shifted bashfully.

"What was your major?"

"Double. PolySci and History."

"So what are you going to do with that in New York?"

"Hopefully get a job as a political consultant."

An awkward silence.

"Glad you asked." Rey laughed, her eyes still on the road.

"What?"

"Usually you ask the person their answer to the question."

"Oh. Uh, what was your major?"

"Journalism."

"And what--"

"I got hired by a little paper, you may have heard of them, The New York Times," she answered proudly.

"Wow, that's really great, Rey." He smiled genuinely.

"Oh, thank you. Yeah, I'm really excited. My internships actually paid off, which is nice."

Ben looked at Rey. She was clearly proud, and had already clashed with his personality multiple times. He glanced over at her, strictly focused on traffic, and examined her face. He hadn't really looked at her much, but now noticed the freckles on her nose, the red tint to her chestnut hair, and the color in her cheeks. She was quite pretty. Her hair was up in a tight braid, and she was dressed plainly in a black turtleneck and jeans. Actually, with her wire rim glasses, she looked a bit like Steve Jobs. He wondered how she'd take that complement. But she wasn't ugly by any means.

"Oh, naff off!" Rey cursed at the man who had just cut her off. Ben chuckled softly. There was no arguing that she was uptight.

--

As Rey was growing tired and Ben growing hungry, they pulled off at the nearest exit for food, landing them at a roadside diner. The conversation had been minimal; they mainly listened to the radio to pass the time while Ben pointed out landmarks.

As they settled into a booth, they both perused the ridiculously large menu in silence.

A waitress came over to the table, and gestured to Rey. "I'll have the number thirteen, but please no mushrooms or bell peppers, and I'd like feta instead of cheddar cheese, and could you add bacon?"

"Ye--"

"--And I'd like a fruit cup for the side, but please leave it in its own dish, and if there's honeydew I'll just have the hashbrowns."

"Alright. And for you?"

"Uh, I'll just have the big breakfast with toast. And a black coffee."

After a few minutes, "I guess the one thing I've heard about you is that you have a dark side."

Ben looked up at her, grinning. "Really?"

Rey nodded.

"From who?"

"I don't know, people. I once heard you cussed out a professor."

"True."

"And that you had sex with one to get ahead."

"Not.. true. Who said that?"

"I'm kidding."

"I would never do that."

"God, I sure hope not!"

"What, you've never even thought about using sex to get something?"

"No! Sex is something to be used for love and expression, not manipulation."

"And who have you been having expressive, love-filled sex with?"

"That's none of your business, and besides, you just said you wouldn't do that either."

"Yeah. But I don't believe in that love and expression bullshit either. In my experience, the more I seperate the two, the better it is."

"Then you aren't making love."

"I don't want to make love."

"God, I thought you said in the car you've been with Paige for eight months! What were you doing for eight months?"

"Liking each other, and having great sex."

"But don't you want... more?"

"Oh, trust me, I'm all familiar with a dark void, but I just don't think some person can fill it. And if I get attached to them and they leave, I'll want to jump off a bridge. It's not that I'm not a romantic, it's just that love will ultimately kill me. So I don't really get that attached." He took a sip of his water.

Rey just stared at him.

"What?"

"That is a dark side."

"What, are you just happy all the time? Do you have a quilt on your bed? God, I bet you do."

"No, I am not! I just don't think it's healthy to put up walls."

Ben rolled his eyes. "How many people have you been with?"

"I don't see why this is important."

Ben took another sip of water.

"Alright, two."

"And were either of those breakups particularly painful?"

"How do you know I'm not still in a relationship?"

"Why would you be? That's stupid."

Rey rolled her eyes. "Okay, I'm not. And no, they weren't."

"Then you don't get it."

"Well, the first one, no, but the second one, I missed him."

"How was the sex?"

"I don't understand why you need to know every single private detail of my life."

The waitress appeared with their food at that moment. "The omelet and fruit,"

"And the Big Breakfast and coffee. Y'all enjoy."

Rey glared at the plate. "Fucking honeydew."

"Just take it out. Here, I'll eat it."

He reached over to take out the fruit and he could feel Rey's eyes on him. Maybe she felt the same sort of attraction he did for her.

They ate in silence, but kept exchanging stares at each other. Once they were done and waiting on the bill, Ben said, in the most blase voice, "Rey, you're a really attractive woman, you know that?"

Rey shifted. "Thank you."

"I mean, I'm really surprised you've only been in two relationships, I think you're quite attractive."

Rey's brows furrowed.

"Ben!"

"What?"

"Paige is my friend! You can't come on to me like that!"

"I'm not coming on to you!"

The waitress arrived with the bill. Ben muttered his thanks as they got up from the booth.

"You absolutely were. You don't say something like that when you're with somebody else!"

He paid for both their meals as he continued to plead, "I'm not coming on to you. I just think you are attractive and I'm telling you--"

He opened the door.

"--and I'm not saying it because I want to have sex with you."

"Well I don't want to have sex with you!"

He sighed. "Rey, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to make you uncomfortable."

She rolled her eyes and got into the passenger seat.

Ben scooted the seat back and turned the car on, along with the radio, and the navigation, and they started to drive in awkward silence again.

"This is why my theory is true," he said, matter-of-factly.

"What theory?"

"Men and women can't be just friends, because the sex part always gets in the way."

"I think we can both look at what just happened and clearly see that you were what got in the way."

"Yeah, but it was my attraction to you. My desire for sex."

"You said you didn't want to have sex."

"Yeah. No. I don't. That's not what I meant. I mean, ahh," he sighed. "Heterosexual--I'm assuming--men and women can't be 'just friends' because their natural desire for sex will get in the way of anything platonic."

"I think that's ridiculous, and reduces men and women to stupid sexual animals."

"Do you have any male friends?"

"Of course."

"They want to sleep with you."

"No they don't! What about Martin?"

"Who is that?"

"My friend."

"Is he gay?"

"Yeah, but--"

"I said heterosexual. Of course he doesn't want to sleep with you."

Rey turned to face him. "Well then, I guess we can't be friends. That's a shame. I thought you were a cool guy, if not arrogant and assuming. Plus, you're the only person that I know in New York."

Ben sighed. He'd said too much.

"I can drive the rest of the way. You get some sleep."

He turned to see if she would protest, but her eyes were already closed. He turned off the radio, put on his headphones, and prepared for the long drive ahead.

Chapter Text

October 2012

—

Rey’s hands slid down Finn’s back and under his jacket as he pulled her deeper into a kiss at the airport terminal gate. He moved away from her mouth and started sucking at her cheek, moving down to her neck, leaving a trail of kisses and Rey sighed in pleasure.

“Finn? Thomas Finn? Is that you?” Rey quickly turned away out of their passionate kiss to see... was that Ben Solo? The boyish scruff, long, middle-parted hair, and cheap t-shirt and jeans she remembered were replaced with a much older, corporate-looking man. His hair was cut shorter into a neat trim, his face was clean shaven, and his body had filled out its tall, angular shape she remembered. He was dressed in an expensive-looking suit and still had the same air of arrogance she had left him with.

Young adulthood had treated him well, apparently.

Finn seemed unfazed by the interruption, and shook Ben’s hand vigorously.

“Ben Solo! Man, you look great! I haven’t seen you since...” Finn trailed off into silence, but Ben patted his arm.

“Hey, it’s fine. I cut all ties with the Tea Party shortly after you did. Believe it or not, my firm is actually consulting on the Obama reelection campaign, so it’s funny how things change.”

“Wow, that’s crazy, man.” Rey was still blushing and avoiding eye contact when Finn straightened, put his arm around her, and said, "Oh, sorry, I've been so rude. Ben, let me introduce Rey Kenobi."

Ben's stare lingered on her for a few seconds too long and Rey thought he'd remember her when, "Ben Solo. So nice to meet you." He stuck out his hand and smiled and Rey coldly shook it.

After an awkward pause, Ben stuck his hands in his pockets. "Well, I'll leave you two. So nice to see you again, Finn, I'd love to catch up. And, lovely to meet you, Rey."

As he walked off, Rey let out a loud groan. "Thank God he didn't recognize me."

"You know him?"

"We drove all the way from college to New York together five years ago. I'm not surprised he doesn't remember me. He had such a... wide rotation back then."

"You slept with him?"

"Oh God, no! No. He came on to me when he was dating my friend and I promptly told him no. I haven't seen him since."

""Well, I'm sure he didn't mean to be rude. He's a nice guy. But... I'm glad it didn't work out." Finn's mouth curled into a playful grin.

"Oh really? Why?" Rey grinned back up at him cheekily.

"Because I wouldn't have anybody to be in love with."

Rey's eyes widened. "You're... in love with me?"

"Mhmmm."

"Well, I'm in love with you, Thomas Finn." Her heart filled with love as she stared into his beautiful brown eyes.

She pulled him by his collar in for another kiss and they stood there, in a perfect little romantic bubble.

"BOARDING GROUP C." Rey languidly pulled away when she realized it was time to go.

"I love you."

"I love you."

She smiled at him, dazed, and nearly ran into the desk as the attendant scanned her passport.

--

Rey was still giddy when she found her seat on her plane, completely unbothered by the crying baby or the lack of luggage room. She bit her lip, checking her texts. There was one from Finn:

Miss you already. Have a safe trip. <3.

She was just about to text back when she heard a deep voice behind her. “Did we go to high school together? It’s killing me.”

She rolled her eyes and turned around.

“We drove for twelve hours to New York from college together.”
“That’s right! Did we… did anything...?” He motioned between them.

The woman next to Rey blushed and giggled. “Would you like to switch seats with me, sir?”

Before Rey knew what was happening, Ben said “That’d be great!” and was clumsily climbing over her to sit by the window. She was bothered now.

Rather loudly, she said, “nothing happened, by the way. You were dating Paige Tico and I had a moral compass not to take up your offer.”

“How is Paige? Do you keep up with her?”

“No. I was barely friends with her. You might want to call her yourself.”

“I have. She got married last year and I went to the ceremony. It was lovely.”

The captain announced their flight to DC was about to take off. Rey took in a nervous breath and looked over at Ben, who was looking out the window.

--

Once they were up in the air, Rey finally felt like she could settle, flipping through a National Geographic.

“I’m glad you and Finn have found each other. It seems new. I say… Three weeks?”

Rey scoffed. “I don’t understand why you can’t go five minutes without being so ridiculously prying. But yes, it’s new. And it’s been a month, thank you.”

“I’m glad for you. But it’s a shame he took you to the airport.”

“Why?”

“Well, I don’t take people to the airport at the start of the relationship. Because later, they don’t have any reason to ask ‘why don’t you ever take me to the airport?’”

“Alright.”

“So, if my memory serves me correctly, you wanted to be a journalist. How did that work out?” He popped a handful of peanuts into his mouth. Rey was in awe of how little five years had changed his mannerisms.

“Pretty good, actually. I’m also going to DC for work, but it’s just to interview some lobbyists.”
“Oh, I’m actually not going for work. My firm operates entirely out of New York. I’m helping my fiance move.”

Rey’s eyes widened. “Fiance?”

Ben nodded.

“You’re getting married?”

He nodded again.

“Huh.”

“What?”

“It’s just… so out of character, I don’t know. The last time I spoke to you you were all ‘sex is non-committal,’ and now you’re committing to a lifetime of sex with one person, who you love! It’s quite impressive character development, actually.”

“Well, you’re right. I didn’t see myself getting married. But I’ve been hit by cupid’s sparrow.”

“Michael Scott?”

“Yes.”

“So, who is she?”

“Gwen Phasma... she’s a litigator from Brooklyn. She’s terrifying, but, jeez, I don’t know! We just kind of work out,” he grinned. “We were together for almost two years and lived together for one of them, and then I just bit the bullet and did it. She’s great.”

Hearing Ben gush about this woman made Rey sincerely happy for him, actually.

“Wow, Ben. That’s really wonderful. Can I see a picture?”

“Oh, yeah!” Ben pulled his phone out of his jacket pocket and pulled up a picture of him, in a tux, with an extremely tall, thin woman with bleached blonde hair styled in a chic pixie cut, wearing an elegant gold gown. They posed in front of a Christmas tree and looked happy.

“She’s beautiful.”

“Mmhmm.”

He put his phone away. They sat in comfortable silence for the rest of the ride.

--

As they got off the plane in a line, Ben asked bluntly, “You wanna have dinner in the food court? Just friends.”

Rey grabbed her bag from the overhead and frowned at him. “You said men and women couldn’t be friends.”

“When did I say that?”

“On the ride to New York.”

“No, I never said that--” They exited the plane and walked down the steps of the tarmac. “--Well, yes, I did say that, but our current relationship status changes the rule. If both the man and woman are in relationships then they can be friends.”

Rey walked faster, but he continued to babble on as if he were talking about a political theory. “But then of course your partner might look at your friendship and get jealous, because that friend provides a companionship that they can’t, when really it’s just that they’re just a friend. But really, deep down, you know as well as they do that you are attracted to your friend. I mean, who are we kidding. So I guess that puts you back at point A. But if you aren’t attracted to them yet, there’s no point in avoiding a potential friendship for this hypothetical fear--”

“Ben.”

“--So I suppose it does work out after all.”

“Ben. Goodbye. I’m really happy for you and Gwen.” Rey gave him a sincere smile and left him at the terminal while she headed for baggage claim.

“Nice to see you, again, Rey.”