Archive of Our Own ^beta

This was honestly made as a joke, but please enjoy.

"V-Virgil, wait~!"
"N-no! This can't happen!"
Y/N gasps as she wakes up immediately. She shakes her head as she checks the time. Another day, another nightmare. Another chance to be scared out of her wits by the smallest things. She was dreaming that she had finally had the courage to ask her biggest crush Virgil out underneath the pale moonlight on the last Friday of the month. He had left her in the dust, seemingly turned to ashes on the spot, and floated away. She was crying, and the whole world ended. A little dramatic? Yes, but he was everything to her. Her reason to live, her dreams, and her hopes.

She checked her phone, scrolling through the notifications from last night. Nothing too interesting catches her eye off the bat. She can see slivers of her wallpaper, a picture of her and Virgil together. She smiles as she softly places her hand on the picture of him. It was one of the only pictures that she had of him smiling. She began to break out into soft, but terrifying laughs. Her face twisted into an unnatural smile as she entered her passcode A-N-X-I-E-T-Y. Almost immediately, a notification from virgil_anxiety_sanders Instagram page was posted. She clicked, and nearly dropped the phone. She clicked on it without hesitation, foot tapping as she breathed heavily to read the post. Her heart nearly shattered when she saw the picture. It was....Virgil with...somebody. A guy, named Roman. Well...as long as they were just friends.... She was sad to admit that she was clingy. She didn't want him to have any friends except for her. A sudden jolt of anger surged her body.

Her eyes went dilated, and her pupils jumped, then disappeared, the other person becoming a pure shadow as her entire world shook. Nobody else can have him... She was broken from the haze as a text from VIRGIE💜😘 popped up on her phone. Again, as soon as it arrived, she clicked on it. Grinding her teeth, she waited til messages loaded up. Her heart pounded as she read the message, over and over as she took in his words.

VIRGIE 💜😘
Hey...how are you doing?
Y/N
Oh hey! I'm doing really great!

Her heart bounced again as she was texted by him. It really...made her feel alive. She quickly responded to him, and her breath shortened as she paced, waiting for him to respond. The text bubbles by his name appeared and disappeared. Her entire body shook as she waited in suspense.

VIRGIE💜😘
Are you busy tonight? Would you want to see a movie with me?
Y/N
Of course! I'll meet you at AMC!

Her head clouded as her mind was filled with new thoughts. Her heart was pounding as she jumped up and down. She would get to finally spend some time with him! Not caring what the movie even was, she looked into her mirror, and made herself look like a female version of Virgil. Heavy black eyeshadow, short clothes, black combat boots, she never found it creepy. She adored the way she looked. It almost made her...love herself a tiny bit. Next to her mirror, she found her huge picture of Virgil. She bit her lip as she leaned on her wall. Her legs shook just from looking at him. She moaned softly as she murmured. "If I couldn't have you, no one can..."

She pulled her phone out again, her fingers crossed around the cute storm cloud phone charm she had. The soft plastic wrapped around her fingers as she took a selfie of herself, and looked over it. A silver nose piercing shone in the picture, and a soft purple streak of hair separated her normal H/C. How would Virgil not like her black fishnets and plaid flannel? She passed the time by listening to my Chemical Romance and Lil Peep til she passed out. Still muttering the lyrics "I would take my life, just to give it to you.." from Love Letter stayed in her mind as she fell into a deep sleep.

She was awoken, around three hours before she needed to meet him, by her loud alarm. "Oh! What if I'm late! I can't be late for him!" She got up, and quickly fixed herself before running off towards the theater. Her choker bounced as the speed of running, tiring her muscles already.

She was around 2 hours early, but she thought of Virgil the whole way. Catching breath, she pulled her phone out and played a cute game called Animal Restaurant (A/N. bit of self promo, but I love that game, it's so cute!) After the longest time, he showed up. Y/N's attention switched to her phone to Virgil in mere milliseconds. "Oh... hi... should we...go in?" She smiled, almost deranged-like. "Of course Virge!" She couldn't hear him softly muttering "...please...call me Virgil....". She looked back at him. "I got you...most of the snacks here!" It was true. Around 50$ had been dropped, just for overpriced movie snacks. She took his hand and led him to the correct mini-theater. The huge room was dark as hell, and soft mutters were heard. She sat down next to him, right in the middle of the room. There wasn't many people there that she could see. Whispering quietly, she uttered "Looks like it's just going to be us...and a few others..." He smiled as he laid on the small seat, finally settling down. Y/N took a bag of m&m's while Virgil took the skittles.

Throughout the movie, she couldn't pay attention to the film. It was a fighting action movie, with many special effects. Her eyes always darted from the screen back to Virgil. A sudden idea crossed her mind. What if she put a note in his bag? To meet her somewhere private? What if...she confessed near the blossoms? It would be perfect! She pulled out a post-it from her purse, and wrote on the side of the seat. "Meet me at 7 pm, on Friday, by the fuchsia plants at the reserve." That was the most romantic place she knew. Blossoms would fall over them as she confessed her feelings.  She didn't pay attention for the rest of the flick, only staring at Virgil. Her heart was in bliss, surrounded by her one true love. She calmed down the tiniest bit, from her usual panic around Virgil. The film ended, and Virgil snapped Y/N out of her trance when he stood up to clap and leave. With him gone, her happiness fizzled away, slower and slower, til she was left dead inside, like always. She headed home, thinking of the future the whole way.

The date had come faster than she had expected. Five hours before, she had freaked out. What if she was late? What if she didn't look good enough? She scrambled around her house, managing to scrape together a present for him. A small CD with all of the music they listened to together. At 2:17 pm, she ran to the park. Her bones ached as she ran her little ass off. Panting, she reached the tree. After what seemed like hours, he came. "V-Virgil!" She squeaked.

"Y-you wanted to meet me here? Well...what did you want to say?"
"Virgil, It was the curse of my life to be sent to this estate. From the moment I first saw you, I felt the connection between us- a connection that should never have existed, and never should have lasted. I tried to admire you from a distance... just as I saw the stars in the sky and knew I could never touch them. But we were too young, and I was with you too often, to preserve that distance. You were my friend, my companion... and later I came to love you as deeply as any girl has ever loved a guy. That never changed for me, although I've grown through the years. No matter how I want to deny it, I will always love you. V-Virgil, do you love me b-"
"I'm sorry Y/N. I should have told you this ages ago... I'm gay....I think I like Roman.
All the energy and hope that Y/N had been thinking and experienced had fell flat. "W-wait! N-no....don't leave me! S-stop!" Virgil turned his back, and left her. The CD fell, and shattered. She fell to her knees, sobbing. Her heart ached, and she couldn't feel her lungs taking in air. Her head hit the ground, getting cut by the glass, and she felt dead. Dead inside, all her will to live had just left. All gone...nothing to love for.

Skip this part if you are uncomfortable with brief cutting xoxo
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Y/N lay on her bed, coated in tears and bandages. She spun her little switchblade between her fingers. The pink and black design really stood out from her normally grim room. Her mood hadn't got any better, and she was seriously contemplating using the blade on herself. Maybe...it would make her feel better? She extended a finger, one that had the tattoo reading "love now, cry later" and the other side said "skyscrapers"
A/N: If any of you get the reference, you are my new best friend. I literally love you if you get this
Extending the blade, she twirled it again. Without warning, the little blade slashed at her. A small howl-like noise escaped her lips. A sudden feeling of bliss shocked through her body as the incision roared with relief. Small trickles of blood poured down her finger' and reached the base of her hand. It felt...right....
She cleaned the blood up as she closed the blade and put it in her small sock drawer. She still panted, and caught her breath. As she did this, she got another text.
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VIRGIE💜😘
Roman, baby, are you good with tonight? Would you bring some new movies? Xoxoxo love you!
Oops, sorry Y/N. that was meant for somebody else!
Y/N
Oh, ok Virgie!

Behind her cheery response...tears flooded her eyes. Then-
An idea...
If I can't have him, no one can. Why not...eliminate this other guy?
It had only been so little time...he had a boyfriend already?

Multiple thoughts raced through her head. "Why am I doing this? How will I do this! How will I hide a body-" She shuddered. Too many ideas were racing through her head. She knew she had to do it tonight. It's the only time. A week had passed since she had unsuccessfully confessed her love. She headed down to her garage, and went out to the store. A pair of white gloves, and a box cutter were purchased. She also bought some packing peanuts, empty cardboard boxes, and and some shoe polish, trying to make her choices seem right. She left the store shaking.

"I'm going to do it, I'm going to commit murder, I'm going to do it."

She knew exactly where Virgil lived. She had a key to his back door. She had a plan...sort of. She gripped the box cutter with her gloved hand. Her head ached as she couldn't believe what she was doing. It was time...

She crawled through the back door, lightly taking steps as she heard noises from upstairs. They seemed to be having a blast, watching movies together. Small talk was definitely going on....what could it lead to? Slowly heading down the stairs to the basement, there was the vent that lead to Virgil's room. Her heart jumped as she heard his voice again. She could hear directly what was going on. She stopped for a moment, listening to everything that was going on. All of a sudden, some crates toppled over, and hit the ground, causing a loud wreck as they fell. She thought of stopping them, but that sparked another idea. What if she lured Roman down here?
Holy shit! What was that?
The first thing she heard was Roman's voice. Her heart twinged, this was the guy she was rejected for.
Oh, Roman, it's nothing to worry about. Probably some boxes...
But...stay here, I'm checking that out. Nobody's going to hurt you Virgie.
She stopped listening, and curled her fist when she heard Roman call him by her nickname that she gave Virgil.
Quickly hiding behind the mess, she had to hide when she heard somebody coming down the stairs. Her breaths were ragged, if she was caught, she could be arrested. Roman closed the door behind him.
"Hello? Is anybody here? I'll have to hurt you if you touch me or my boyfriend-
She jumped out of the shadows, and made her way over. Might as well make this quick~
"He's mine... I don't know what you are talking about...
"Who...are you? Are you the creepy girl that Virgil mentioned?"
"He's mine Princey. Not. Yours.
"I-I don't get what you're saying. What do you mean.
She glided closer to him. "I'm sorry...I guess..."
She raised the sharpened box cutter, and tackled him to the floor. A light scream erupted from Roman. She lifted her hand right above his heart, and covered his mouth. His pupils grew as he realized what was going to be done-
"You don't deserve him"