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The problem was, Tam and his mentor weren't exactly very close.
Sure, he was one of Lady Zillah's only prodigies, and one of the best ones at that, but they never really talked outside of her criticizing his form or him making up ridiculous excuses as to why he was late. Her class was like a blur to him, he just walked in, and walked out with no regard to what happened in between.
But then the echoes happened, and they were forced to work together, night and day, to save Fitz and Sophie. Tam trained even when he wasn't with his mentor, because, for the first time, he'd found himself caring for people other than Linh. And while it scared him, he also knew that he couldn't let his friends down, not when he was the only one who could save them. Life without Fitz and Sophie would inevitably be much, much, worse.
So, much to Lady Zillah's surprise, he actually began to improve. He finally learned how to truly control his powers, and even learned how to use shadowflux, although he absolutely hated doing it.
Eventually, Sophie woke up, and while she was doing far from fine, Tam still felt relieved that Umber hadn't killed her. But every time he visited Sophie, he felt his eyes drift over to the lean, muscular boy laying on the cot across from her, his eyes gently closed and his skin an odd greenish-tan color.
Sometimes, when Sophie was out or asleep, he snuck into the Healing Center and sat by Fitz Vacker's bed, gently placing his hand on the other boy's forehead and trying to soothe him with the cool, calming, shadows. Occasionally, Fitz's teal eyes would flutter open, and suddenly it made sense why teal was Sophie's favorite color. It was beautiful. At least on Fitz Vacker it was.
In case it wasn't obvious, Tam Song had a gigantic crush on Fitz Vacker. And he had absolutely no idea what to do about it.
"You've been spending quite a lot of time in the Healing Center," Lady Zillah commented one day as he hurried into the classroom. Tam shrugged.
"Helping my friends," he said simply.
She raised an eyebrow. "You're blushing."
Tam cursed internally. "I'm not blushing," he lied, though he could feel his face becoming increasingly redder.
Lady Zillah rolled her eyes. "Goodness, if you have a crush on the Moonlark, then tell her. I don't want your silly teenage emotions affecting your control on the shadowflux."
Tam stared at her, confused. The Moonlark? What the heck did she mean by–
Oh. Oh alicorn poop. Sophie was the Moonlark. And Lady Zillah apparently thought that Tam, who had shown literally no interest in Sophie, was in love with her.
He couldn't help it. Tam laughed, doubling over and clutching his stomach as the laugh slowly turned to a chuckle, and then a giggle, and then he was on the ground laughing so hard he could barely breathe. Shadows stretched out around him, clearly affected by his sudden change in emotion, but he didn't bother to control them. Lady Zillah stared at him, eyes widened in surprise, as if she couldn't believe she was actually seeing cold, emotionless, Tam actually showing emotion on the floor of her classroom.
"I would advise you get up and stop laughing right now, or you're failing this class immediately. Or at least tell me what was so funny about my statement on your obvious crush on Miss Foster." She was clearly trying to maintain a professional tone, but her immense confusion seeped into her voice, clearly giving away her true feelings.
Tam slowly stood up, leaning his arm on a chair for support. "It's nothing," he said, still chuckling, "I just– you really think I have a crush on Sophie? She's like a sister to me! No! That's Keefe's thing!"
Lady Zillah just sighed and shook her head. "What, is it that Vacker boy, then?"
Tam felt his face redden even more. He really should've expected her to get it, after all, there were only two people currently in the Healing Center, for security reasons. She had a fifty percent chance of getting it, and since Sophie had already been ruled out, that only left Fitz. Ah. Come to think of it, he probably should have thought this whole situation through a little bit more.
Lady Zillah's eyes widened comically when she saw his rising blush. "Wait, seriously?! I didn't think you were... that type."
Tam felt his heart sink. Of course Lady Zillah was homophobic. She was no different from Quan and Mai; she would kick him out of her classroom and abandon him to find his own way around his abilities. Honestly, she was probably going to out him to the entire school now, so that everybody could collectively make fun of him.
Much to Tam's surprise, Lady Zillah continued on. "Honestly, it's mostly spoiled brats I see falling in love with the Vacker boy, but I suppose it's better for him to be with someone like you than to be with someone like, say, the Heks girl."
Tam stared at her open-mouthed. "Wait, what?" he said, very intelligently.
Lady Zillah rolled her eyes. "What, are you going to tell me you're in love with Endal next? Because I assure you, those Flashers have no good intent towards us Shades. Too obsessed with their little light tricks to truly understand the world around them."
"No, no," Tam said, still in shock, "I... I thought you were... well, you know. Homophobic?"
His mentor stared at him in shock, before her face immediately softened. "Tam, no matter how mean or strict I might seem, I believe in what's right for everybody. And that means equality. It doesn't matter who you love, or who you don't love here, it just matters how much effort you put into my class."
Tam nodded along, quietly. If only Mai had done the same thing instead of screaming and shouting. If only Quan hadn't hurt him the way he did, and instead comforted him the way Lady Zillah was doing now...
Wow. He never thought he'd ever say those words. But strangely enough, he felt an odd kind of... safety in his mentor's room, knowing that there was at least one person in the world who knew and accepted him for who he was.
"Wait," Tam said, his head shooting up. "What do you mean, 'how much effort I put into your class' ?"
Lady Zillah smirked. "You've got a quiz on shadowflux tomorrow. Don't fail or you'll regret it." Then, with a small smile, she pulled out a piece of paper from her pocket. "This is what you're going to need to do. Learn it, and don't mess up."
Tam smiled softly. "I'm your best prodigy. You can't fail me."
"Try me."
********************
It was two weeks later that Fitz finally woke, with a gasp and a shout that immediately woke Tam up.
"Tam?" Fitz asked, his breathtaking teal eyes meeting Tam's as he noticed who was laying on the cot next to him.
Tam jumped up. "Fitz!" he whisper-shouted, reaching to hug him. Fitz immediately flinched away.
"Sorry, but who are you and what did you do with the real, cold, emotionless Tam?" he asked, his voice heavy and tired.
Tam blushed, then immediately covered it up so he wouldn't scare Fitz even more. "Sorry, just happy that you're awake."
Fitz raised an eyebrow. "Have you been there the entire night?"
"Entire week, actually," a voice, presumably Sophie, shouted from across the room.
Shut up, Tam shadow-whispered to her.
You guys are adorable. I'm not going to stop, not now, not ever, she transmitted to him in response.
Fitz reddened, then rubbed the back of his neck. "Wow, really? That's nice of you, Tam."
"I don't do nice," Tam said with a snort. Fitz laughed.
"Of course, how could I forget? 'Nice' isn't included in the emo vocabulary."
"Oh, just kiss already!" yet another voice shouted from seemingly right beside them.
Tam rolled his eyes. Sometimes, he hated his friends. Especially Biana, and her crazy shipping radar.
Somehow, Fitz turned even redder, vaguely resembling the planet Mars. "Er... well, I mean–" His stuttering was cut short by Biana un-Vanishing beside them.
"Okay, we're going to fix this once and for all. You, brother," she gestured at Fitz, "are insanely in love with Tammy, over here," she gestured at Tam, "and Tammy is madly in love with you. Therefore, you should both get together so that poor Sophie and I don't have to deal with the tension, because it's killing us."
Now, they were both red, and refusing to meet each other's eyes. "You know guys," Sophie shouted, "it's Valentine's' Day, technically! It's one am, making it the fourteenth!"
"There you have it, folks, love is in the air. Now you two bumbling idiots better kiss like there's no tomorrow, or I'm going to buy Linh ten new murcats, and buy myself some too." Biana added, smirking.
Tam sighed, raising his gaze to meet Fitz's. His brilliant teal eyes shone like stars in the dark night sky, and they were coming closer and closer and closer until–
Their lips met, albeit awkwardly, as Tam leaned forward to make sure Fitz didn't exert himself too much. It lasted barely ten seconds, but it still left them both breathless as they separated, their faces both a dark magenta.
"Well, nice to see my prodigy is doing his extensive research on the effects of shadowflux," a voice said from behind Tam, causing him to redden and immediately whip around to face none other than his Shade mentor.
"Uh..." he shifted in his seat uncomfortably. Lady Zillah laughed.
"Of course, now that you two are actually dating I can finally get that money from Tiergan. Carry on, boys, but don't go too far because I'm supposed to be chaperoning you."
As she laughed, Biana turned to Tam in shock. "You told Lady Zillah before us? Tammy, I'm offended!"
Fitz laughed, a beautiful sound that made Tam want to kiss him all over again. "Leave him alone, Biana. There's a reason Sophie isn't telling you about her crush on Keefe."
"Her crush on who?!"
"Fitzroy Avery Vacker, you're so getting it next time we're doing trust exercises!"