Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Haley Winchester parked her old Cutlass, the only thing that she owned now apart from her personal stuff, and wiped her sweaty hands on her jeans. She took a deep breath, delaying the moment when she had to get out of the car and go into the building. Sitting in the car, she felt safe and protected and she wanted to keep that feeling for a few more minutes.

Through the windshield of her car she looked up at the stripclub which seemed almost dead by day. After losing everything - her business, her money, her home - she was there to ask the one single person that could be willing to help her out for his support. Her brother-in-law was her last option.

She knew she was taking a risk in many ways but she was at her wits' end and didn't know who else to contact. Closing her eyes for a second to gather courage, Haley finally opened the car door and got out.

Walking slowly to the back where the office was, she tried not to panic. Everything was going to be fine, the worst he could do was reject her and kick her out. Haley knocked softly on his office door and walked inside.

He looked up at her and his eyes widened in surprise.

Different emotions swept through him at the sight of her. She looked awful. She was pale and had dark circles under her eyes from stress and lack of sleep. Her hair was pulled back into a pony tail, she was wearing a white tank top and washed out jeans. To his horror he noticed a bruise on her arm that had already started to fade and was the colour of an ugly yellow. Briefly, he wondered how she got it.

However the smile on her face shocked him the most, he had never seen her smile so fake in his entire life. Despite being in solidarity with his brother, he felt sympathy and a sudden urge to help rise up inside of him and he forced those feelings back down.

"Haley." He said quietly. He tried to figure out what she wanted. He knew she would never have showed up in his office if she wasn't in real trouble.

"I'm a little surprised. It's been three years." He stated, unmoved, and Haley dared to step a little closer since he hadn't cussed her out yet. She took it as a good sign. "Hi, Sam. I..." Haley started but got scared in the next moment.

Sam was sitting behind his desk looking at her with that serious and intimidating aura of his surrounding him. She would never dare to fuck with him. He was a heartless business man.

"What's the matter?" He asked quietly but not too friendly. Then, he heard Haley say the words he had never expected to hear from her.

"I need your help." She answered and brushed nervously a loose strand of hair out of her face. She walked a little further into the room and took a seat on the edge of the chair in front of Sam's desk.

Sam leaned back, looking at her intently. She seemed honest but it could be only an act after all. He decided to be cautious.

"With what?" He asked and saw panic appear in Haley's eyes. Her smile was still fake; she wrung her hands nervously in her lap. "I need a job."

Sam raised an eyebrow at her words but didn't say anything.

"I... I was hoping I could wait at your club." As soon as she had said those words, she jumped off the chair and started to pace the office. "I'm the last person on earth to have the right to ask you for help..." She continued quickly and then stopped and looked at him again.

Tears had formed in her eyes and she held them back, forcing herself not to start crying. "I lost everything, Sam. I don't have anything besides a crappy car." She choked out.

Sam leaned forward, placing his forearms on top of the desk, intrigued by her statement. "Start at the beginning." He requested and gestured for her to take a seat again.

Haley sat back down and hung her head, not daring to look into his eyes.

"It was a mistake to go into business with my father and uncle." She started. "I trusted them blindly and signed everything without reading the small print. So, here I am now. We went bankrupt and I had to pay for everything which in the end left me with nothing. My father and uncle are doing great by the way, thanks for asking." She added sarcastically.

Sam was speechless for a second, his sister-in-law was sitting in his office asking to work for him. He should tell her no, for Dean's sake, but he couldn't. He had always liked her and he wanted to help her out of her horrific state.

"I have enough waitresses, I'm not looking for anyone." He said after her speech. Haley looked up at him and tried to understand what had just happened.

Her brother-in-law had actually listened to her and not kicked her out right away. She was more than thankful for that. "It's okay. I'll pull through somehow..." She started but Sam interrupted her again.

"But I do happen to be looking for another bartender." He said and watched her reaction. "You interested?"

Haley was shocked. He was willing to help her. "Yes, Sam...I..." She stuttered. "Why?"

Sam sighed and leaned back in his chair. "I'm not so sure myself but honestly...you're family, Haley. And that's all I need to know."

Haley swallowed the lump in her throat but couldn't suppress a tear to roll down her cheek.

"Thank you, Sammy." She whispered and he nodded. "Okay, so...let's go, I'll show you the club." He added and got up from behind his desk.

"So, you have any questions?" Sam asked Haley after he had showed her around the club and told her everything she needed to know.

They were sitting at one of the tables at the still empty club. In a few more hours people would be storming through the entrance, filling the place within seconds.

Haley looked around, taking everything in. "No, I think I got it."

"Good. Listen, actually I'm glad you came to me. I really need your help, it's too much work for my girl alone and she needs someone to relieve her from time to time." Sam said and Haley frowned. "Your girl?"

"That's how I call the girl who bartends here, so I won't confuse her with one of the dancers. She's my go-to for every matter." He explained. "There are so many girls working here; it's too difficult to remember their names. Besides, the dancers only ever use their stage names."

"So, I should call all the girls by their stage name and when you're talking about your girl, you actually mean the bartender?" Haley checked again, making sure she got it right.

"Yeah. Don't worry, you'll get into the routine quickly. And you'll get to know a few of the dancers when you start your shift tonight." Sam said and got up.

"Okay, I'm looking forward to it. Thank you again, Sam." She said shyly, getting up.

Sam didn't like her devoted appearance; suddenly he felt uncomfortable as well.

"Don't thank me. You need a job and I need another bartender, so we're helping each other." He stated and Haley could have sworn she saw a tiny smile flash across his face and then disappear again.

"Where can I reach you?" He suddenly asked and put a hand on her lower back, leading her through the club and towards the exit.

Haley looked over at him nervously and searched for the right words. How was she going to explain to him that she had actually expected him to kick her out and therefore hadn't looked for a place to stay?

She opened her mouth to reply but Sam beat her to it. "You've no place to stay." He concluded, looking at her, and Haley nodded.

"Okay, so you're going to stay with me, then." He stated matter-of-factly and Haley's eyes widened.

"What?" She exclaimed. "Sam... that's not a good idea."

"Why not?" Sam asked provokingly, though he knew what - or rather who - her problem was.

Haley waited a few seconds before she gave an answer. "He wouldn't like it." She said, approaching the topic carefully. She knew Sam knew what she was talking about.

Sam sighed, growing annoyed with her. "You do realize that working for me implies seeing Dean every day? You should've thought about it before you came to me." He said coldly and Haley started to feel dizzy.

"Yeah, I know. And I want to see him again." The thought of their reunion caused a pleasant shiver to run down her spine. She was must have been officially out of her mind. Dean was probably going to kill her as soon as he laid eyes on her.

"I don't want to cause any trouble, believe me."

Sam shook his head at her in disbelief. "You've got some nerve, you know that? After everything you put us through, especially Dean. Don't you dare act all innocent now."

"Sam, I'm so so sorry, I've made some mistakes but I'm not asking for forgiveness. You have to believe me, I'm not putting on some kind of a damsel-in-distress act." Haley pleaded with him hoarsely, she hadn't meant to upset him.

Sam looked at her intently, knowing she was telling the truth. He was good at reading people. Unfortunately, he hadn't been as good at it three years before. "I don't trust you Haley, I'm not sure if I ever will, but I believe you. I can tell you're being honest. Just stay away from Dean."

"I love him." She declared quietly and Sam felt the sudden urge to kill her; Haley noticed the look on his face.

A crooked smile appeared on her face and she let out a laugh. "I know you want to kill me for saying it out loud but it's the truth. My feelings for Dean have always been real."

Sam was surprised when he found himself smiling at her. "Do you have any idea what you got yourself into? You're playing with fire."

"Yeah, I know. But I also know that you would never hurt me. You've always liked me, Sam, and even though you would never admit it, I know I've hurt you, too. And I'm sorry. You can look at it as a test-run though. You have complete power over me, I'm dependend on you."

"Yeah, but you could stab me easily in the back at any moment."

"I guess, you'll have to take that risk. And isn't it much more fun this way?" She provoked and Sam couldn't help but chuckle.

This was going to be interesting.

Haley followed Sam to his house in her Cutlass, trying to process their conversation. She didn't know what had gotten into her but she hadn't been able to stop talking about Dean. What was wrong with her? She had told herself over and over again not to bring him up but when Sam had suggested she could stay with him she simply couldn't keep her mouth shut. 

Haley sighed heavily, feeling still pretty shaken up. She should be thankful; Sam still hadn't killed her, even after everything she had said.

She saw Sam's car screeching to a halt and quickly put her own car behind his in park. She got out and looked at the huge mansion that was Sam's home.

"I take it, you never moved." Haley stated and Sam let out laugh at her words, making her smile. "No, and I'm not intending to."

"That's very wise." She replied with a smile and followed him to the huge front door. Suddenly, images from the past flooded her mind as she was reminded of the bloody scenery that her father and uncle had caused in that house three years before.

Haley shook her head, thinking of something to say. She wanted to redeem herself and started to chat with him.

"You really don't have to show off, Sam. And you know why? Your appearance puts the fear of God into everyone automatically, so you don't need to demonstrate how rich you are to have people awestruck."

Sam chuckled at her words and stepped aside to let her in after opening the door.

"You've been here plenty of times, so go ahead and pick a room, I don't care which one." Sam stated and closed the door behind them.

Haley turned to him. "Really? Well, if you don't mind I would like to stay on the same floor as you."

Sam shrugged his shoulders and followed her up the stairs.

"Nothing's changed." Haley remarked happily as she glanced into every room and then chose the one opposite from Sam's.

"I really hope you don't mind. I mean, I don't want to invade your privacy. I just... don't want to have a whole floor to myself. I don't want to be alone." She explained quietly and Sam wanted to hug her. Instead, he told himself to stay cool, keep his distance.

"It's okay. You're not bothering me." He replied with a little smile.

Haley brushed a strand of hair behind her ear and stepped a little closer to him.

"What about... when you're having a woman over, or several women, I mean I don't know what your sex life looks like or what your sexual preferences are, but for all I know you could easily be having a threesome..." Haley ranted awkwardly, blushing at her own words. "Anyways, I don't want to ruin your sex life."

Sam looked at her amused, suppressing a laugh. "Don't worry about it. I have an extra floor for those activities. I don't take girls to my bedroom." He replied and Haley looked dumbfounded at him for a few seconds. "You're even worse than Dean."

This time, Sam laughed out loud. "Actually, he uses the sex floor most of the time."

As soon as those words had left his mouth, Sam wanted to hit himself for being so cruel. Haley turned even paler and Sam could see her inner struggle before she eventually got her emotions under control and smiled dryly.

"Of course he would."

"It was just a joke..." Sam cleared his throat and changed the subject. "Yell, if you need anything. I have some phone calls to make if you'll excuse me."

"Yeah, sure. You don't have to entertain me." She said with a laugh and Sam turned to leave. He still felt bad for his remark though. She couldn't have looked more terrifed if he had held her at gunpoint. He had to say something to make her feel better.

"Haley?" He called her back and she turned around to him. "I'm not proud of it, but I missed you."

Haley's heart started to ache at his words; she didn't deserve such kindness. She ran up to him; not hesitating for a second, she threw her arms around him, making Sam stumble. "I missed you, too." She whispered in his ear.

Sam held her close for a few seconds before he pulled away and went downstairs, pleasantly surprised and a little touched.

At midnight Dean was at the club, slightly drunk and preoccupied with a stripper on his lap. The girl was one of the hottest chicks he had ever laid eyes on and he had already had the pleasure of testing her skills in bed. He hadn't been disappointed at all.

Though Sam had almost killed him for sleeping with one of the employees, he realized soon that it was no use to fight Dean on that; he would continue to seduce the dancers at their club.

Dean let out a groan as the girl rubbed herself against him, whispering naughty promises into his ear. He couldn't wait till her shift was over and he could take her back to his place and fuck her senseless.

"Hey, man. Why didn't you tell me you guys hired a new bartender?" A male voice called out suddenly, the man plopping down in the seat next to Dean.

Dean cursed, annoyed, but turned his head and focused on the guy sitting next to him.

"What?" He demanded, looking at him angrily.

"You should check her out, dude. Totally hot." The guy replied and got up again, disappearing somewhere in the club.

Dean was confused. Why didn't Sam tell him that he had hired someone? They had opened the place only recently and usually his brother kept him up-to-date about every issue concerning business. Dean frowned as he thought about it, instantly intrigued.

The new bartender was totally worth it to be checked out.

He put a few hundred dollar bills into the girl's thong and pushed her off his lap as he got up. She pouted in disappointment but turned to the next available guy.

Dean made his way over to the bar but he never reached it because he had to stop dead in his tracks in the middle of the club as soon as he caught sight of her.

This couldn't be real; it had to be a nightmare. A cruel yet wonderful nightmare. He thought he would never see her again yet there she was behind the bar, pouring drinks.

Dean heard his heart pounding in his ears and his hands started to shake. He didn't like this. He didn't like this at all.

In the next moment, he felt a wave of anger wash over him and he wanted to go have a nice talk with Sam. But he never got the chance, because she looked up and their eyes met across the room. It wasn't a romantic or loving moment, however.

Haley was busy with pouring glasses after glasses for all the thirsty men sitting at the bar when she felt someone staring at her. Automatically, she let her gaze sweep through the room and it landed instantly on him. Her heart almost stopped and she couldn't catch her breath.

Nothing about him had changed she noticed in relief, but the feeling didn't last very long. The pure hatred in his eyes hit her like a fist in the face and she had to gasp for air.

Then, she saw him storm to the back, his eyes never leaving hers on the entire way. She watched him disappear eventually and closed her eyes for a second.

Haley knew that it had only been the beginning. It was about to get way uglier between them and she let out a heavy sigh. But she had known what she was in for when she had come there. She knew it wasn't going to be easy.

Haley wanted him back. She would give her life to get him back.

And she was determined to get what she wanted, no matter how long it would take her to succeed.

Chapter Text

Sam had told Haley that he believed her, and it was the truth. But he didn't trust her, so he had to run a background check on her.

He was sitting in his office, staring at the computer screen. His eyes widened with every bit of information he came across and he shook his head in disbelief as he read the FBI files.

Haley had definitely told him the truth, but she had left out the gruesome parts of her resumé. Again, Sam couldn't help but feel sorry for her.

That poor girl's life had been a horror show for the past three years.

Sam wondered whether he should talk to her about it but he knew it would be too embarrassing for her and he didn't want to make things awkward and uncomfortable between them. Maybe some time in the future she would want to talk about her criminal past and would bring up the topic herself.

His thoughts were interrupted when the office door flew open and his pissed off brother stormed into the room.

Sam sighed inwardly; apparently Dean had seen Haley and his brother's reaction was exactly what he had expected. He remained cool and collected; Dean's aggressive mood didn't affect him in the slightest. Sam wasn't irritated by him.

Dean shut the door closed loudly behind him and rushed over to Sam's desk, stopping in front of it. He stood like a brick wall opposite Sam, his eyes sparkling with refrained fury. His jaw was tight and his whole body tense as he crossed his arms in front of his chest to appear nonchalant, but failed. Sam could see how upset he was.
A tortured smiled appeared on his face as he thought of the right words.

"Something you wanna tell me, Sammy?" He finally spat through gritted teeth and Sam realized in that moment that his brother wasn't pissed. Dean was hurt.  And he tried to cover it up with anger.

"I'm sorry, Dean." Sam replied.

"Why didn't you tell me?" Dean flared up. "I walk in here and see her pouring drinks behind the bar like everything's normal and we're one damn happy family!"

"Dean, I understand how you feel but..."

"Oh really? I highly doubt that. How could you possibly know what she put me through?" Dean continued to lament and Sam felt all the sympathy for his brother turn into anger.

"Damn it, Dean! Would you listen to me?" He exclaimed and shot up from his seat but didn't walk around the desk.

Sam's outburst shut Dean immediately up and he looked in surprise at his brother.

"You think I did this to torture you? I knew you'd be upset! But I've had my reasons for giving her the job."

Dean raised his eyebrows at him and shot him a disparaging look. "Why did you have to find her and bring her back into our lives? I was absolutely fine with not seeing her."

"I know." Sam sighed and sat back down in his seat. "But I didn't do anything. She came to me."

"Come again?" Dean said quietly, but his voice was trembling with anger. How dare she? How dare that bitch show up on their doorstep again?

"She needs help, Dean. Believe me, you would've done the same if it was the other way around."

"But it's not the other way around and I don't want her near me." Dean chuckled bitterly. "Help, huh? Don't you see it, Sammy? She's fucking with us again. She's told you some pretty convincing lies and you fell for it. She's tricked you, that's her specialty."

"No, I checked up on her past. It's even worse than what she's told me. She's been to prison, Dean." Sam explained calmly and gestured to the computer screen.

Dean's interest was awoken. He walked around the desk and stopped behind Sam to take a look at the FBI files. He knew his brother could easily hack computers and get to any information that he needed without leaving traces.

Dean raised his eyebrows as he learned about what had happened to his wife. Haley had been to prison after committing a white-collar crime. Sam waited for Dean's reaction, hoping the information would soften him and make him feel at least sympathy for his wife.

Dean's conclusion shocked him.

"Serves her right." Dean stated coldly and walked back around the desk.

"Dean!" Sam exclaimed. Up to this point, he had thought that Dean still harboured feelings for Haley even though he would never admit it. But his reaction only showed that he would never let her in again.

"She's innocent! Her family betrayed her and put her in prison!" Sam defended her; surprised by his own reaction to Dean's cold-hearted words.

Three years before he had been as pissed as Dean at Haley and wanted to kill her for trying to screw with them. But now, he was only able to feel sympathy for her.

"Are you into her or something?" Dean suddenly asked, narrowing his eyes at him. "Well, go ahead and fuck her! I don't care." He exclaimed and balled a fist, slamming it on Sam's desk, causing the computer and papers on top of it to jump at the impact. "I don't want that fucking bitch back!"

Dean's behaviour contradicted his words, however. If he didn't want her then why would he act so emotional?

Sam folded his hands on the top of his desk and looked at Dean with an expression on his face that he couldn't decipher. "That's your wife you're talking about." He stated calmly, appalled by Dean's choice of words.

Dean shook his head and in the next moment his real feelings were written all over his face. The pain and hurt that he had been suffering from for the last three years resurfaced in his eyes.

"No, she's not." He said hoarsely. "I don't even know her. That woman out there is a stranger to me." Dean gestured to the door of Sam's office and then looked back at his brother. "Don't you get it? She's not the woman I thought I'd married. Her whole personality was made up to trick me into marrying her. It was a ruse to get to us. To get to our money, to our wealth. To destroy our business relations. And once she'd accomplished that she screwed us over and destroyed us. Our relationship was a lie."

"But she hasn't. We managed to keep our business and we still have our wealth. The bottom line is, she hasn't damaged us at all. Sure, we were forced to get better safety arrangements, but hey, we've learned our lesson well, haven't we?" Sam pointed out with a laugh. "We're not going to be that careless concerning our business ever again. We should be thankful."

Dean hung his head and groaned. How could he explain to his brother that even though Haley hadn't damaged their business, she sure as hell had damaged him. He knew he would never trust a woman ever again.

"That bitch ripped my heart out of my chest, cut it into thousands of pieces and fed it to the stray dogs!" Dean growled, gesturing with sweeping movements.

Sam looked at him, amused by his exaggeration. "Don't you think that metaphor is a little extreme?"

"Oh, fuck this! Do what you want but keep that bitch away from me." Dean spat and stormed out of Sam's office.

He didn't feel any desire to go back into the club and see her again, so he was thankful for the backdoor at the end of the hallway.

Dean quickly stepped outside and breathed in the fresh night air. His wife was back in town, so what? He could handle it and this time around he was prepared and wouldn't let her deceive and seduce him again.

Sam was a good person, sometimes a little too nice, and if he wanted to help Haley then it was his problem. But Dean would keep an eye on her and make sure that Haley wouldn't take advantage of Sam's kindness. After all, it was his job to look after his little brother.

Sam leaned back in his seat and forced himself not to worry about Dean. His brother would seethe for a little while but calm down eventually and pretend like nothing had ever happened.

At first Sam thought Dean had come back when his office door opened again and looked up in surprise, but he was greeted by a young girl with ginger hair and hazel eyes.
He felt better in an instant. A wide smile spread across his face and he even got up from behind his desk and walked towards her.

"Hey, Zoe. How are you?" He asked and took both her hands in his and pressed a light kiss on her cheek. Zoe's heart started to race at the contact even though Sam greeted her like that every time she came into work.

"I'm good, thanks." She replied with a huge smile. "I saw Dean in the parking lot and he didn't even say a word to me. Is everything okay?"

Sam sighed again and gestured for her to take a seat as he leaned against the desk.

"I finally hired another bartender, so that's good news for you. She's really great, you're gonna like her. But Dean's not really on good terms with her."

"Why?" Zoe asked. "Did he sleep with her and never called her back, so now it's too awkward?" She joked, but seeing the look on Sam's face, she quickly realized that she had hit a sore spot.

"Sorta. She's Dean's wife."

"Oh my God. The woman that almost ruined you guys?" Zoe asked in shock.

Sam had told her about the history of their business when he hired her in order to explain to her why they kept all their employees on a tight leash and constantly checked up on them. Zoe listened to him carefully and took the job anyway. She needed the money to pay her school fees.

She was in her last year of college and she had immediately come to Sam for a job when she had turned twenty-one. Sam was the only employer who was willing to give her a job despite her inflexible schedule and she was more than thankful for it.

The fact that she was twenty-one and bartended at a strip club didn't bother her at all. It had appalled her family at first because they thought it was too dangerous for a young girl her age to work in a sinful place like the Blue Velvet.

But the owner provided a safe environment for all his employees, so she never had to worry about safety.

"Yeah. That's her." Sam answered and saw all the questions burning in Zoe's eyes but he knew she would never dare ask for more juicy details. And Sam wasn't willing to give them to her.

"Zoe, you're supposed to be working in..." Sam glanced at his watch and then back at her. "...five minutes." He stated coldly and Zoe knew she was starting to bother him.

She swallowed hard and cursed herself for being so curious. The Winchester's family situation was not her business and she shouldn't have asked.

She got up from her seat and smiled a shacky smile. "Have a nice day... or night." She tried to joke as she backed out of the room. When she had reached the door she quickly turned around and hurried out of the office.

As soon as the door had closed behind her, Sam regretted his being so harsh with her. She was a nice and really smart girl and usually he enjoyed talking to her. But the day had already been rough enough with Haley showing up and the semi-aggressive discussion with his brother and he was running out of patience.

They all had weeks of emotional roller-coasters ahead of them since Haley was back and if Sam was honest with himself he would admit that the thought of what was to come scared the hell out of him.

In the end, either Dean or Haley would kill the other, that was a given.

Haley met Zoe and got along with her right away. Zoe was an enthusiastic and funny girl and managed to distract her from Dean. As soon as she had stepped behind the bar and introduced herself, Haley knew she would get along with 'Sam's girl'.

And she was grateful for not being alone that night.

Sam hadn't exaggerated, it was a lot of work and as the night went on Haley asked herself how Zoe had managed to deal with this by herself.

She turned towards her to start a conversation to get to know her better. She didn't mean to appear desperate, but she could really use a friend at the moment.

Haley never got to ask her about work, though. She noticed Zoe's glance to the back where Sam's office was, a sad look appearing on her face.

She had done that a few times during the past three hours and Haley began to wonder what was going on. A conflict with the boss maybe? No, she doubted it. Zoe wouldn't be that sad because of a reprimand from Sam.

It briefly crossed her mind that maybe something was going on between them but her presumption seemed too far-fetched to her. Sam was too professional, he wouldn't be having an affair with an employee. Besides, Zoe was nine years younger than him.

Haley looked at her again and the longing look on Zoe's face reminded her of Dean again. Obviously, he had left the club after storming into the back. And she knew it was because of her.

He didn't want to see her and the fact hurt Haley more than she had expected.

Of course, she had known that he wouldn't be taking her back with open arms but she was appalled that he couldn't even stand being with her in a public place like a nightclub where crowds of people were keeping her away from him.

Dean didn't even want to breathe the same air as her.

Thankfully, her shattering thoughts were interrupted by a big white wall that turned out to be Sam's muscular chest covered by a white shirt. She quickly looked up at him and faked a smile.

Sam frowned, a little surprised how upset she still was because of Dean. "Hey, girl. How are you doing?" He asked way too cheerily.

"Good. Everything's fine." Haley replied. "I love Zoe, she's great." She added and Sam chuckled "Well, then you should get in line. She has a lot of admirers."

And are you one of them? Haley bit her tongue in time before the words could leave her mouth.

Sam had accommodated her and was so nice to her, so she didn't want to push her luck. But she vowed to herself that she would ask him about Zoe some time in the future when things between them weren't as raw and fragile.

"So, listen. I'll be here till closing time 'cause I still have some paper work back there." Sam said, gesturing with his head in the direction of his office. "And I thought we could ride back home together after the party's over."

His smile was kind but Haley got suspicious. She narrowed her eyes at him, reading between the lines. It wasn't an offer out of friendliness so that Haley wouldn't have to go back to his place all alone in the early morning hours.

Sam wanted to keep an eye on her and make sure she didn't do something stupid.

Haley saw through him, but she didn't feel the need to tell him that. After everything that happened she couldn't blame him for being careful and controlling.

At least he believed her. The unspoken fact hung between them in the air as Sam kept looking into her eyes, knowing she knew he needed to keep an eye on her. He waited for her answer.

"Sure. Sounds great." Haley said nonchalantly as if nothing was wrong and he was only offering her a ride without any ulterior motives.

Sam smiled at her, a little surprised that she hadn't taken him to task. But then again, maybe she really had changed and genuinely wanted to redeem herself and was willing to endure everything to prove that she wanted them back in her life.

He turned around and made his way back to his office and Haley watched him until he was out of her sight.

She wished that her quiet agreement to any measure of inspection that Sam could possibly have for her in store showed that she still cared for them. For the both of them.

Chapter Text

Sam and Haley were driving through the streets in the early morning hours, heading home. Haley was exhausted and could barely keep her eyes open, but despite her physical tiredness her mind was on overdrive.

She wasn't sure whether it was because she had been working all night until three in the morning, but she was starting to feel that it had been a bad idea to come back and ask Sam for help.

Haley started to think that she wasn't going to get her family back, no matter what she would do. Dean's hatred and Sam's suspicion were proof enough. She had lost their love and trust a long time ago and she wasn't going to gain it back again.

Sam felt Haley's dark mood radiating off of her, it was present in the inside of the car and flowing dangerously between them like shock waves.

He looked over at her to look intently at her profile in the dim light; she looked tired and sad. He figured the whole day had been too much for her and, hell, he understood. He himself had trouble sorting and keeping his emotions under control.

He had no idea what to feel when it came to her. In that moment in the car, Sam realized that he wanted nothing more than to be able to trust his sister-in-law unconditionally like he did years ago and the thought scared him. He feared he was starting to soften.

Damn it, Dean was right. Haley had played him and he had started falling for her tricks. Sam sighed and shook his head to get rid of his brother's voice and decided to distract himself.

"So..." He started and paused to clear his throat. Haley was brought back to reality and looked over at him, her tired eyes focusing on him.

"I talked to Dean." He continued, feeling his walls starting to come down again as soon as he saw the expression on her face.

A tortured smile appeared on her face as she tried to hide her nervousness. "I figured that he would run to you when he took off as soon as he caught sight of me, like I'm toxic or something."

Sam smiled a forced smile though the sadness in her voice broke his heart. He was starting to believe that Haley had told him the truth; that she had always loved his brother even though everything else was a lie.

"He just needs time." Sam replied cautiously but to his surprise Haley snorted at the statement. "I highly doubt that. I screwed up and now I have to live with that." She interrupted herself, appalled that she was actually yammering again. "I'm sorry, Sam. Forget it." She added quickly and looked him straight in the eye.

Sam squinted his eyes at her, trying to figure out whether it was just one hell of a melodramatic act -- and she was one hell of an actress -- or whether she was just sharing her feelings and fears with him.

Either way, Sam didn't care. He had promised himself to give her a chance and he was trying his best to still see the good in her.

In the meantime, they had reached Sam's house and he put his car in park. Haley didn't dare to make the first move and continued to sit still.

She could see by the look on Sam's face that he was being cautious, figuring out what she really wanted and she couldn't help but smile at how suspicious he was.

"I just want my family back. That's it." She said quietly and Sam's eyes widened slightly but he quickly regained his posture. "And I just want to be able to trust you again." He said back.

His words made her feel better in an instant and caused her to act on impulse. Haley smiled widely at him and extended her hand. "Friends?"

As soon as the words left her mouth she felt all insecure again. What the hell was she thinking? Sam didn't trust her and he most definitely wouldn't accept her offer.

Sam was surprised by her reaction but didn't let it show. He took her hand in his and smiled back at her.

"Friends." He replied, shaking his head in disbelief. "You are very convincing, Winchester." He joked and was glad when the clear sound of Haley's laughter filled the car in the next moment.

Feeling a lot better since Sam had cheered her up, Haley climbed out of the car and began to tell him about Zoe who had kicked a guy out all by herself when he got too friendly.

"I swear, the bouncer was totally shocked and just froze in place not sure what to do. Zoe had the situation under control. If you ask me you can let that guy go, he's useless."

Sam laughed and followed her up the steps and inside. Still giggling, she walked down the hall and into the kitchen only to stop dead in her tracks at the threshold. Her laughter died immediately.

Sam stood next to her, not daring to move either. He wasn't sure what was about to happen but he decided to act as if their situation wasn't uncomfortable at all.

Dean sat at the kitchen table with his feet casually on the table top and a bottle of beer in hand. He heard the joyful laughter coming from the hallway as soon as the front door opened and now he was looking at his brother and wife with an undefinable expression on his face as all three of them waited for someone to say or do something already to break the awkward silence in the room.

Dean set his bottle of beer down on the table and Haley watched as a wolfish smile spread across his face. She knew it wasn't a good sign. He put his feet back down on the floor and stood up from his chair, walking slowly over to them.

"What is she doing here?" He asked Sam but his cold gaze focused on Haley.

Sam walked casually into the kitchen and over to the fridge, taking out another bottle of beer. Not rushing, he opened the bottle and took a gulp before finally answering Dean's question. "Isn't it obvious? She's staying."

Dean spun around and shot daggers at him. "Come again?"

Sam sighed at his brother's act. Why did he have to make it so complicated? "You heard. She's staying here with us."

Haley was listening to the brothers' interaction in fear, not daring to say a word. She hoped if she stayed quiet, there was a little chance that Dean wouldn't explode. But when she heard Sam's reply she couldn't keep her mouth shut.

"Us? What do you mean by us ?" She asked, her voice sounding almost hysterical as it began to dawn on her. "Does he live here with you?"

Dean turned back around to her as though he had just remembered that she was still in the room. Their eyes locked again.

"What happened to our house?" She asked, looking bravely at him.

Dean's heart was beating so fast that he had trouble breathing. But when he heard Haley's voice he felt himself regain his cool composure in an instant. He crossed his arms over his chest and leaned against the kitchen table. "I sold it." He replied quietly, still looking at her, and watched in pleasure how her eyes filled with pain.

Haley had to swallow a few times before she was sure she had her emotions under control. But before she could say something, Dean continued talking. "I hated that house. I didn't want to stay where everything reminded me of the worst years of my life."

Every single word was like a sharp arrow to Haley's heart. Though she knew he only said those words to hurt her, it didn't change the fact that it still hurt like hell.

Sam quickly jumped in at this point before Dean could say more hurtful things. "Anyways, Haley has no place to stay, so I offered her to stay with me."

Dean laughed bitterly. "There are plenty of hotels on every corner, she can stay there." He stated coldly. "Damn it, Sammy. I'm really trying my best to be okay with her working at the club, but I sure as hell won't accept the fact that she's also staying under the same roof with me!" His voice grew louder with every word until he yelled the last words.

Haley didn't know what to say; she was hurt. But it even hurt her more to see Dean suffering like this. Maybe she should have left him alone and never gotten back, but now it was too late to go away and pretend like nothing ever happened.

Besides, she didn't want to ever leave again and she prayed to God that maybe someday Dean would at least start to act normal around her, without thinking she was about to trick him at any given moment.

"What do you want?" Dean suddenly barked and looked at her again with piercing eyes.

Haley was too insecure to answer. And she didn't know if she understood him. "I'm sorry?" She asked cautiously, confusion written all over her face.

"Dean, stop it." Sam's sharp voice cut through the air but Dean didn't pay attention.

He narrowed his eyes at her and walked closer to Haley who backed away a little, getting scared.

"Don't play dumb, sweetheart. Is it money? Do you want more money?" He asked dangerously calm, but both Sam and Haley knew he was about to lose it.

His imputation was an insult and Haley's pain turned quickly into anger. "You're the one playing dumb. You know exactly what I'm here for and I'm pretty sure Sam's already told you about my intentions."

Dean raised his eyebrows at her boldness and smiled in amusement.

"You really expect me to believe that whole load of crap about wanting a second chance? I don't believe that you still care, if you ask me you're not able to care about anyone but yourself. So, don't try to sweet-talk me with your heartbreaking stories."

"Dean, enough already!" Sam yelled, starting to panic when he saw how cruel his brother's words and how pale Haley had gotten.

"Stay out of this, Sam. This is none of your business." He yelled back without breaking eye contact with Haley.

Dean took a few steps towards Haley and she backed away until she hit the kitchen wall and realized she was trapped like an animal in a cage. Dean was standing in front of her, looking down with a menacing sparkle in his eyes. He waited patiently for her reaction.

Haley took a deep breath. Dean was enjoying the power he had over her but she wasn't afraid to stand up for herself.

"I'm a bitch, I know. I screwed up and I destroyed my life, because I was too careless. I'm not ashamed to admit it and I genuinely want to redeem myself. I don't care whether you believe me or not, Dean. Think of me as the whore you think I am. But you know as well as I do that I love this family more than anything in the world. I never lied to you about that." Haley quietly ended and held her breath in shock.

She hadn't planned on saying the last part and waited anxiously for Dean's reaction. He hadn't moved yet, Sam was standing still a few feet away from them, watching his brother intently. Haley could hear his quiet breathing.

It all happened fast; in the next moment Dean moved closer to her, breaking the remaining distance between them and raised his hands in a sweeping movement.

"How dare you say that to me?" He yelled, finally allowing himself to let his anger free.

Haley noticed how furious he was and feared he was going to hit her or slap her face and she quickly raised her arms as a shield and pressed harder into the wall, a tortured whine escaped her lips.

Dean froze in shock at his wife's reaction, his fury wiped out instantly.

She really thought he was going to physically hurt her and the thought scared him. He would never do that. He was angry and agitated but he would never lay a hand on her.

What had happened to his wife? He had never seen her this vulnerable and frightened before.

A cold shiver run down his spine as it dawned on him that someone else must have hurt her that way.

He closed his eyes and ran a hand through his hair, not being able to look at Haley's bent form as if she was in pain.

Suddenly, he felt a strong wave of protectiveness rise inside of him and he cursed quietly. That was the last thing he needed.

Sam stood next to Dean, shock and anger cursing through his body at the sight of Haley. Obviously, someone had broken the girl and he knew for sure that it could only have been her father and uncle.

Haley was cowering next to the wall, her hands still folded over her head in a protective way, waiting for the pain that Dean's hand was most certainly going to cause. And it would hurt like hell.

The fact that Dean was actually going to hurt her brought tears to her eyes as she awaited the impact of his hand on her skin.

But nothing happened.

Haley dared to peek and saw Sam and Dean looking down at her, the same expression on both faces.

They seemed to be surprised and... terrified. Haley realized that Dean hadn't intended on slapping her in the first place and she relaxed a little. Slowly, she straightened up and in the next moment a hot fire that felt a lot like shame washed over her. How was she going to explain her reaction?

And judging by the look on the brothers' faces she had totally freaked them out. She couldn't tell them that she had lived in fear for the past three years and therefore, her instinctive reaction had become absolutely normal to her.

Maybe she would tell them the truth someday, but now was not right place or time. She gave a shaky smile, pretending like the past two minutes had not happened.

Dean blinked a few times and stepped away from her to take a few sips from his bottle of beer. The image of her crouching in fear like a little girl in a corner of a room was still lingering in front of his eyes and he couldn't shake it.

"Dean" He suddenly heard her voice call out to him and he turned to her with a blank expression on his face which he was thankful he could manage at the moment.

When he looked at her, Haley continued quickly. "You're right. I shouldn't be staying here. I'll go look for a hotel." She said and glanced quickly at Sam before leaving the kitchen.

"Dean!" Sam exclaimed in a reproachful tone. "What?" Dean asked, confused.

"Don't you want to go after her?"

"What? Forget it! You go after her if you want her to stay here so bad." He retorted.

"Didn't you see what just happened? We can't leave her alone. She needs us." Sam said and hurried out of the room.

Dean sat back down on his chair with a heavy sigh. He had never felt more confused or lost in his life before.

Sam caught up with Haley right on time before she could have gotten into her car. He slammed the door on the driver's side of the Cutlass closed and gently took her arm, turning her to look at him.

"Haley, don't go."

"No, Sam. It's okay. I really appreciate what you've done for me but maybe it'll be for the best if I stay as far away from you guys as possible."

"Haley..." Sam started.

"I saw the look on your face." Haley interrupted him. "Honestly, I didn't expect myself to react that way, either."

"Dean would never hurt you." Sam said quietly.

"I know. But the past three years have been rough and now I even jump at my own shadow." She tried a light tone, her smile a grimace.

"Haley, what happened? You're not telling me the whole truth." Sam tried to get through to her.

"Not now, Sam. Please." She begged and the look in her eyes made him back off.

"Okay, but you're staying with us, that's part of our deal. I thought you wanted your family back."

Haley thought about it for a minute and then a genuine smile stretched her face.

"You're right. I'm sorry." She said and Sam wrapped an arm around her shoulder, leading her back towards the house.

Chapter Text

The next day, when Haley was working at the club again, she found herself keeping an eye out for Dean. Even though it was difficult to see through the crowd and she was almost deaf from the loud music, her eyes continued to scan every corner and her ears listened to every noise in case her husband had showed up.

She hadn't seen him ever since their encounter from the night before. When she went back inside the house with Sam, Dean was no longer in the kitchen.

In the morning Sam told her that Dean had already left again and he had been absent the whole day.

Now, she was waiting for him to at least show up at the club.

Haley sighed and forced herself to get back to pouring drinks and serving the customers. She calmed herself with the thought that Dean probably needed time and she had to accept the fact that he was avoiding her. It wasn't an easy situation after all.

But it still hurt. She needed to talk to him so badly.

Haley sighed heavily again at her dark thoughts.

"Wow. What's wrong?" Zoe asked, bringing Haley back to reality. She had to speak loudly, so Haley would understand her over the music. "You seem so tense and agitated tonight."

"It's nothing, really." Haley tried to play it off and blushed. She was embarrassed that Zoe had actually noticed what state she was in.

"Come on, don't be shy. You can tell me what's bothering you. I'm a bartender after all." She added with a smile and Haley considered it for a minute.

It would be nice to talk to another woman about her problems and she was sure that Zoe would understand. But she still hesitated.

She didn't really know the girl and they weren't alone, customers were sitting along the bar. However, it were only a few men and they were too preoccupied with either their drinks or the show on stage and didn't pay attention to them.

Haley felt the need to share her pain with someone and decided to take the risk. She cleared her throat and stepped closer to Zoe, so she wouldn't have to shout to be heard.

"I've been waiting for Dean to show up but it's already past two."

Zoe squinted her eyes at her and then looked across the club. "Well, I was wondering myself where he's gotten to. Usually he's here every night."

Haley closed her eyes and sighed. "Of course he is."

Zoe looked back at Haley, hesitating for a second. "Hey, is it true that, uh..." She trailed off.

"What?" Haley asked.

"Is it true that you're his wife?" Zoe finally asked, fearing that that question was too forward and insensitive. Even though Sam had told her that Haley was Dean's wife, she still had to ask her herself. She didn't know why, however. Maybe it was because she had a hard time imagining Dean being married.

Usually, she saw him make out with a different woman every night. So the news that he actually tied the knot a few years back had taken her by surprise.

"Yeah, we've been apart for the past three years but we never got a divorce. Technically, I'm still his wife." She explained sadly and looked to the entrance.

Still no sign of Dean.

Zoe looked intently at her for a few seconds and then realized something. "You're still in love with him." She stated and Haley nodded.

"He hates me though. I know I hurt him but I didn't do it on purpose. I need him in my life." Haley confessed and Zoe felt her throat tighten. She could tell that Haley was telling the truth.

She thought about Haley's words for a minute before speaking up. "Listen, Dean's a difficult man. I guess it's hard for him to see you again and he needs to sort his feelings first, that's why he's staying away."

"You're probably right." Haley said, feeling a little better. "I'm sorry for pouring my heart out. Let's talk about something else."

"Like what?"

"Tell me something about yourself." Haley asked and in the next few minutes Zoe told her why she was working at the club and how she managed college next to her other part-time jobs.

"My parents aren't wealthy, so I somehow have to make my own money. I didn't want to go to a lame community college." Zoe said and Haley smiled at her.

"You're living your dream, aren't you?"

"Yeah, I want to be a lawyer and I'm willing to do everything to make my dream come true. Even if it requires bartending at a strip club where the customers are drunken idiots controlled by their hormones." She said with a smile and Haley laughed out loud. She had already grown fond of Zoe.

One of the waitresses came to the bar and slammed her tray with a loud thud on top of it. Haley and Zoe stopped talking and turned to her in surprise.

"Aren't you guys supposed to be working?" She spat and glared at them.

Haley felt bad. She was there to bartend, instead she and Zoe had been chatting the whole time. But so far no one had complained. Most of the men were passed out at the bar anyway.

Zoe however wasn't feeling guilty. The waitress was a control freak and constantly complained about everything and everyone, so she had stopped paying attention to her a long time ago.

"As you can see, there's not that much to do." She said, gesturing to a few passed out men.

"We do have a lot to do. One of the waitresses called in sick, so get your ass over there and start serving the customers!"

"I'm sorry, last time I checked I was still a bartender and not a bitchy waitress." Zoe spat back and Haley feared that she would go off on the girl, so she quickly stepped between them, pushing Zoe back gently.

"I'll help you with the customers, okay? I'm sorry, I'm new here. What's your name?" Haley asked, trying to be friendly even though the waitress started to annoy her as well. She knew that type of person well enough and she knew how to act around them and handle those kind of situations.

"Mandy." The waitress replied, obviously pleased with herself.

Haley kept up the fake smile. "I'm Haley. Now tell me, where's the fire?"

"The guys over there have been waiting for their drinks for the past thirty minutes and they seem pretty pissed."

"I'll take care of that." Haley reassured and grabbed a tray. Mandy told her what they had ordered; Haley quickly poured the drinks and left the bar after giving Zoe a warning look.

After she had served the shots, Haley was heading back to the counter when she spotted Dean sitting in one of the lounges with a few other guys and enjoying the show on stage.

When had he arrived at the club? Why hadn't she noticed him even though she had been on alert almost all night?

Haley quickly looked away and proceeded towards Zoe. Her heart was beating loudly, she tried to ignore it.

"You saw him." Zoe stated quietly after seeing her face. Haley wasn't able to say anything.

"Listen..." Zoe started nervously. "They just ordered something to drink."

Haley turned a little pale upon hearing that. "What? I... I can't do this... I can't go over there and bring them the drinks." She whispered, scared to death.

She feared Dean's reaction. What would he do if she just appeared in front of him and those guys, carrying a tray with the drinks they ordered?

"I'm sorry. Mandy just disappeared and there isn't another waitress in sight." Zoe replied and refilled the drinks for a few men at the bar although they hadn't asked for it. But she knew that they were going to drink anyway. "Plus, one of them asked for you specifically to bring them the drinks."

"Excuse me?" Haley raised an eyebrow, appalled. She didn't want to be treated like that. "I'm a bartender, not a waitress." She said sternly.

Zoe sighed. "Yeah, I know. But he wouldn't take no for an answer and I had to promise him you'd do it."

Haley glared at Zoe, even though it wasn't her fault, and took the tray reluctantly.

She slowly made her way through the club, dragging out the moment she would have to face them. She couldn't believe how far she had fallen.

There she was actually going to serve some horny douchebag because he said so and expected her to fulfill his wish as if she was some sort of commodity.

When she had reached the lounge, Haley took a deep breath, telling herself to quickly place the glasses on the table in front of them and leave again.

Dean still hadn't noticed her and she prayed that she could slip past him. Chances were good since his eyes were glued to the dancer on stage anyway.

Without looking at him, she started setting the drinks on the table with a slightly trembling hand.

Dean had noticed her the moment he stepped into the club. She had been waiting at a table but he had ignored her, relieved that she hadn't seen him.

He didn't want her to know that he was there.

He wasn't very pleased when the guy who was sitting next to him told Mandy that he wanted to be served by the new bartender.

He had been the one to inform Dean the day before that Sam had hired her. Obviously, he was interested in Haley and Dean didn't like it. Not at all.

He forced himself not to analyze his feelings for his wife though and tried to focus on the show. But it was no use, his thoughts kept drifting to her.

And then Haley appeared in the lounge -- the guys who were sitting next to him on the upholstered sofas in the sitting area took their drinks and gave her dirty, sleazy smiles.

Dean couldn't take it any longer and dared to glance in her direction. His breath caught in his throat.

Haley was wearing her usual pair of blue jeans, nothing exciting. But the black satiny top enveloped her upper body loosely and the hem reached only her navel, revealing her perfectly defined stomach.

Dean wasn't able to explain what happened next.

Haley felt Dean's eyes burning a hole into her body. She turned her head to finally look at him and their eyes met.

Her mouth was dry and she licked her lips, getting nervous.

Slowly, she placed the last drink on the little tabl without taking her eyes off of him.

Dean continued to look at her and when she licked her lips in that seductive way he felt a hot wave wash over him.

As soon as the bottom of the shot of whisky touched the table top, Dean grabbed Haley's hand and pulled her onto his lap.

Haley's eyes widened in surprise when Dean's hands pulled her to him, causing her to drop the tray. The sound that it made when it collided with the floor was swallowed by the loud music and noise around them.

The next thing that Haley remembered was Dean's hands and mouth on her. He squeezed her ass -- brief, but abrasive -- and pressed her so hard to his body that Haley couldn't breathe.

His mouth was hot on hers, forcing her to give him what he wanted. She immediately wrapped her arms around his neck, digging her fingernails into his scalp and deepened the kiss willingly.

When their tongues met, she let out a loud moan.

Dean's leather jacket was pressing to her naked arms and bare stomach, making her shiver.

They continued to kiss roughly, fighting a battle with their tongues and teeth.

Haley was too shocked and too surprised to think straight. And she didn't want to. She was finally back in her husband's arms and that was the only thing that counted. She didn't care about the motives that made him act like he did.

Dean was appalled by himself. He didn't know what the hell was wrong with him. He only knew that it felt so damn good to have her back in his arms, to feel her hot mouth and soft skin again.

When Dean's hands moved up from her ass and slipped under her top, Haley almost jumped at the feeling of his hot touch on her skin.

His hands moved further up her stomach and to her chest. When he touched the warm and sensitive skin of her breasts he groaned.

No bra.

He felt a jolt of electricity shoot through his body and his abdomen twitched. God, he wanted to take her right there.

Haley felt Dean's erection through his pants pressing to her ass and it made her head spin. He still wanted her.

Suddenly, Dean pulled away, breaking the kiss. But he continued to kiss along her jaw-line and then licked and sucked at her neck.

Haley stopped breathing, the blood was pumping rapidly through her veins and she was losing control.

Dean's fingertips started to tease her already hard nipples and she bit her bottom lip, letting out a whimper that only Dean got to hear.

It was the most sweetest sound of the world.

"Dean..." He heard her moan his name desperately into his ear and thought he was going to explode right there.

He stopped kissing her neck and joined their lips again for an even hotter kiss this time.

They were both breathing and moaning heavily, but no one could hear the sounds they were making.

Dean's hands proceeded their journey back down over Haley's body and when they had reached her hips, he slipped one hand into her jeans, his fingers touching the heat between her thighs.

Haley panicked.

She grabbed his wrist to stop him. She broke the kiss and for the first time since he had pulled her onto his lap, she looked him in the eye.

His eyes were dark with lust, his breath was sweeping over her face. He looked quizically at her, wondering what made her hesitate.

Haley's lips were swollen, she was shivering underneath his hands and Dean detected pure fear in her eyes. He opened his mouth to ask her what the problem was, but she spoke up.

"Not here, please." She whispered against his lips and Dean's heart clenched at the vulnerable tone of her voice.

He was reminded of the night before, how she had pressed into the wall of the kitchen, expecting him to hurt her. Dean cursed inwardly. He didn't want to feel those feelings for her and he tried to play his concern off.

Dean's smirk was so smug that for a second the thought that he would be cruel enough to ignore her protest crossed her mind, but she was proven wrong.

He pulled his hand out of her pants, cupped her face and brushed her lips softly with his before he let go of her. His expression had changed, Haley couldn't tell what he was thinking. When he said the next words Haley thought she was going to pass out.

"You should get back to work." He stated coldly and pushed her off his lap.

Shakily, Haley stood up but remained standing still in front of him, not catching on. She blinked a few times in confusion.

"You heard me." Dean repeated. He knew he sounded too harsh but his own feelings terrified him. If Haley stayed any longer he would be starting to let her in again. He had to be cautious and push her away before it was too late for him.

Haley pulled herself together and dared to look around the club. Only now it occurred to her that she had actually made out with Dean at his strip club.

Luckily, no one saw them, not really. They were alone in the sitting area; the guys that had been there before must have disappeared while they were busy making out.

Haley looked down and saw the tray still lying on the floor. She picked it up. Without looking back, she quickly headed back to the bar.

She couldn't bear seeing that look in Dean's eyes any longer.

Chapter Text

Haley wasn't sure how she survived the rest of the night, but time had flown by and now she was walking through the streets in the twilight of the early morning hours, heading home.

She couldn't get Dean off of her mind and it was driving her insane. Whenever the memory of their hot kiss hit her, her whole body started to tingle and her cheeks turned red. Dean's hot touch still lingered on her skin and she was powerless against the effect it had on her. She found herself reliving the memory and wished she could stay in that moment forever.

Again, she wondered what had gotten into him. She had been constantly asking herself that question for the past few hours. Dean still had feelings for her; he wouldn't have acted the way he had if he didn't. The thought made her smile. But then she remembered his cold and harsh words that followed when he had pushed her off his lap after the kiss.

Was it revenge? Was Dean trying to get back at her and make her pay for everything she put him through?

Haley groaned in frustration. She didn't know what Dean's intentions were, and it scared her. She loved him and therefore he could hurt her easily.

And he knew it.

Haley forced herself to stop analyzing her predicament and focused on her surroundings instead. She had missed this town that she considered her only home so much, and she was more than glad to be back again.

Unfortunately, she spent all of her time working and was too preoccupied with the Winchesters to just go for a walk and look around.

Now she took the chance to admire the picturesque buildings and little shops in the street.

But then she noticed a dark figure cross the street and head straight towards her.

Her heart started to race, she stopped dead in her tracks. It was still too dim, the sun was slowly struggling through the remaining darkness, and Haley couldn't make out the stranger's face.

She took a deep breath and forced herself to resume walking. The tall, dark silhouette got closer with every step and Haley finally recognized that it was a man, dressed in black.

The situation felt eerily familiar; Haley panicked, but tried to swallow her fear. Beads of sweat formed on her forehead and the palms of her hands were moist.

"Please, God no. Not again." She mumbled quietly under her breath, but never slowed in her step. It couldn't be happening again. She feared that those men from her past had tracked her down to get more money out of her again.

Someone must have sent them. But who? Who could have known that she was out of prison again?

The man was really close now, Haley saw his face but didn't recognize him. She braced herself for the encounter but to her surprise, the man walked by without a word.

Haley watched him pass her by. The relief that washed over her made her dizzy. Now she felt utterly stupid.

No one knew where she was. No one was after her. She had to stop being so paranoid.

Nevertheless, Haley sprinted the rest of the way to Sam's house without looking back. She ran up the steps and inside and shut the door behind her. When she knew she was safe she allowed herself to take a deep breath.

"Good morning." Sam said, looking up from his newspaper with a smile as Haley shuffled into the kitchen.

"Morning." She mumbled sleepily and ran a hand through her dishevelled hair. She walked over to the counter and poured herself a hot cup of coffee. With a happy sigh she took a sip.

"Sleep well?" Sam chuckled when she plopped down onto the chair across from him.

"Not really."

She had gotten home at four in the morning and though she had been tired she couldn't sleep. She was too scared that one day the men she was scared of would find out where she was hiding and pay her a visit.

Sam saw how nervous she was and noticed the dark circles under her eyes. She was hiding something, he was sure. He knew her well.

But he also knew that she probably wouldn't want to talk about it.

"Why don't you take the day off?" He suddenly suggested, surprised by his own offer.

He needed everyone at the club, but Haley looked so distressed that he feared she couldn't handle working another night. She needed a break.

Haley's eyes widened. "No, Sam. It's okay."

"You sure?" He asked, unconvinced, and Haley nodded.

"Okay, then. So... we don't cook." Sam announced with a sheepish smile and gestured to the box of doughnuts.

"Well, I'm here now and I could make you some breakfast if you want." Haley suggested with a smile.

"You don't have to do that. Please don't feel obligated to do anything in this house." Sam protested, frowning.

She thought she had to pay him back for giving her a job. It was really frustrating.

Haley didn't know how to react to that. "Uhm... hmm, okay." She felt so insecure.

"That waitress Mandy is a bitch, by the way." Haley said, quickly changing the subject to cover up her nervousness.

"Who?" Sam asked in confusion before it dawned on him. "Yeah, right. Zoe's already told me about it. I'm sorry, things like that happen sometimes. But she'll get reprimanded, Dean's going to talk to her today."

"Oh." Haley said, starting to feel sorry for the girl even though she didn't particularly like her. But it was certainly no fun to get scolded by Dean Winchester.

"Yeah, Dean loves to take care of those kinda things." Sam said, shaking his head. 

"So showing who's boss gets him off, I'm so not surprised." Haley answered, making Sam smile. 

"Yeah, he's a little perv. Anyways, there's something I need to discuss with you."

Haley looked at him questioningly. "What?"

"I'm going on a business trip for a few days. Don't ask me why, it's a long story." Sam waited for her reaction.

Haley placed her cup onto the table and looked at its black content before she dared to look up into Sam's eyes.

Sam leaving meant she was going to stay with Dean alone for a while. She didn't know how to feel about that.

"How long will you be gone for?" She asked calmly.

"I'm not sure, three days give or take." Sam answered. "Is it okay to leave you alone with him? I mean..." He broke off, not knowing what to say.

Haley smiled brightly at him. "We'll be fine. Don't worry."

"Okay. I'm leaving in the morning. Dean's in charge at the club 'til I'm back."

"Great." Haley rolled her eyes.

Sam chuckled. "Don't worry, he's different when he's at work, you'll be surprised."

"You mean he's not hitting on anything in a skirt? I'm sorry, I'm having a hard time believing that." Haley stated with a smile but Sam saw how sad her own words made her.

"I know. If something weird happens or you just feel like talking you can call me. At any time." Sam reassured her, and got up.

He hesitated for a second before he leaned down and kissed her on the top of her head. "I've got to go now. See you later at the club."

"Okay, bye." Haley said, smiling. She heard Sam leave the house, the door shutting closed.

Her thoughts wandered back to Dean. She wondered where he was.

Maybe he was still upstairs sleeping in his room and just hadn't showed yet. The thought of being alone with him in the house made her nervous.

But maybe he hadn't come home in the first place.

The thought of Dean spending the night with a slutty waitress or with one of the dancers was depressing and hurt like hell.

She sighed and decided to go and take a shower to finally stop thinking about her husband.

The shower lightened her mood again and she felt a lot better. Haley pulled her wet hair into a messy bun and put on a fresh pair of jeans and a black tank top.

She jogged down the stairs and walked into the living room. She looked around, not sure what to do with herself.

The room was a mess; newspapers, magazines and clothes were scattered everywhere and a thick layer of dust covered every surface.

Apparently, the boys never thought of getting the house cleaned and were too lazy to do it themselves.

Now she knew what she had to do. Haley couldn't stop grinning as she walked back into the kitchen, in search of cleaning supplies.

Dean walked into the living room after taking a shower. It had been a horrible night and he had had too much to drink; the pounding headache in the morning was the result.

It reminded him of what had happened with Haley the night before and he cursed loudly.

Why had he kissed her? Now he was suffering even more.

He had spent the whole night thinking about her. She was haunting him; he could still smell her scent and taste her mouth. He still heard her breathy moans and he thought he was going to lose his mind.

Dean shook his head to get rid of the memory and quickly crossed the living room, but had to stop at the doorway and look back into the room.

Something had changed, but he wasn't sure what it was.

He shrugged his shoulders and headed to the kitchen. Haley was standing with her back to him, doing the dishes.

Dean stepped closer and looked over her shoulder. "Why are you doing this?" He asked, confused.

Haley let out a yelp and dropped a plate; it shattered on the kitchen floor. She turned around in panic. "God! What are you doing sneaking up on me?"

Dean couldn't help but laugh. "Sorry, I didn't mean to scare you, baby."

Haley took a deep, calming breath. "I was lost in thought and didn't hear you. I didn't even know you were home."

"Where else would I be?" Dean raised an eyebrow provokingly, a smile tugging at the corner of his lips.

"I... I don't know." Haley stuttered nervously. "I thought you were spending the night somewhere else."

She was really confused at this point. Dean was actually talking to her like everything was normal.

"Not this time." He stepped closer to her and Haley took automatically one step back.

Dean was only wearing his jeans, his chest was bare and she looked away, focused her eyes on one point in the kitchen.

Dean started to grin, he liked her reaction. It reminded him of the first time they met.

"Are you working tonight?" He suddenly asked and Haley turned her head and finally looked up at him. When their eyes locked, she felt a little light-headed.

That grin made her weak and the glint in his eyes showed her how much he was enjoying the fact that she was so embarrassed and confused.

"Yeah, I've got to be there at eight. I'm cleaning the house in the meantime. I'm already done in the living room and now I'm trying my best to get the kitchen cleaned. It's a mess, I couldn't even find the sink under all the dirty dishes." Haley rambled, she knew she was talking too much but she couldn't stop.

Dean's presence was too much for her, it made her act silly.

"Ha! I knew the living room looked different but I couldn't figure out what it was!" Dean exclaimed and Haley chuckled at his enthusiastic outburst.

"Well, the difference is, it's clean now. And in about an hour the kitchen will be clean, too."

"Don't bother, sweetheart. It's no use, really. It'll be a mess again by tomorrow." Dean walked over to the coffee machine. Haley closed her eyes in relief, glad that she was able to breathe again.

"No, I'll make sure it won't." She stated sternly, and Dean smirked. "Alright, you're the boss, baby."

Haley licked her lips nervously and turned back to the sink. Dean groaned inwardly at the sight.

What the hell was she doing to him? He just wanted to wrap his arms around her small form and never let go of her, but he couldn't do that.

He couldn't let her in again. He took a huge sip of coffee after pouring the liquid in a cup.

The caffeine calmed his nerves a little and he stepped behind Haley. Immediately, she tensed up again.

She could feel his breath on her neck and it made her shiver.

"Gotta go now. I guess, I'll be seein' you tonight." He whispered, and Haley just nodded. She wanted to ask him where he had to go to but she knew she didn't have the right to ask him that.

Dean wished she would just turn around and ask him why he had to go but he knew she wouldn't do that.

It would take a long time until they started to act around each other like they used to.

Still, her next words took him by surprise.

"Are you going to spend the night at home?" Haley asked quietly, and Dean smiled.

"You'll see." He simply stated and leaned in, placing a soft kiss onto her shoulder. Haley's heart skipped a beat.

"By the way, you're not wearing a bra. Again. That's pretty naughty, babe."

Haley turned around to him in shock but Dean flashed her a smile and disappeared out of the kitchen. She remained standing still, not sure what to think.

The spot on her shoulder that Dean's lips had touched was still tingling.

Chapter Text

"You wanted to talk to me, Mr Winchester?" Mandy said with a flirty smile, stepping into the office.

Dean looked up from the computer screen and leaned back in his seat with a cold look on his face. "Do you know what this is about?"

Mandy was surprised by his tone, but managed to keep smiling, not showing her concern.

How bad could it be anyway? If her boss wanted to fire her she would simply seduce him. She had done it before.

She rolled her eyes playfully and let out a throaty laugh, walking around the desk and taking a seat on top of it.

Mandy crossed her perfectly tanned legs seductively and lowered her voice before she spoke up.

"Zoe's always exaggerating. We didn't have enough waitresses last night, so I asked her and the new girl nicely to help out."

"You do understand that we don't want or need any trouble, don't you? This may be a club but it's also a business and we expect our employees to take their job seriously."

Dean knew exactly that she was putting on a show for him, hoping he would go easy on her. He had had sex with her a few times in the past and Mandy thought they were close, but the fact that they had been intimate with each other didn't make a difference to Dean. She was still only an employee and didn't mean anything to him.

"I'm really sorry, Dean. I promise I won't cause trouble anymore." She whispered, tucked a strand of hair behind her ear and ran her index finger temptingly down the column of her throat doing so.

Dean's eyes roamed down her body slowly as he took in the sight of her full breasts under the tight top, the short skirt and her long, slender legs. He licked his lips, feeling what effect she had on him.

Mandy was a sexy and beautiful girl and he might as well enjoy the view.

"I know you're bossing the other waitresses around, but leave the bartenders alone, please. They're doing their job and you're doing yours, okay, babe?" Dean instructed with a charming smile, watching how she hopped off the desk and stepped closer to him.

She took off her top and straddled Dean's lap. "I got it, Mr Winchester. I'll be a good little girl. Now, let's get to the best part, we've wasted enough time talking."

Dean chuckled at her ignorance. Did she really think she had him completely under control?

But he left her thinking that she was running the show -- and why on earth should he reject a hot and willing girl?

He grinned and didn't hesitate for a second; he pulled her close to his body as she pressed her lips to his mouth.

Mandy moaned into the kiss, happy with herself. Not only had she managed to convince her boss not to punish her but she was also going to get hot and steamy office sex.

Zoe walked to the back of the club to get a few bottles of liquor, but she never made it to the storage room. When she passed the office she had to stop dead in her tracks at the sight in front of her.

The office door was wide open and she saw Mandy, the obnoxious waitress, and Dean in a hot embrace.

After the first shock, Zoe's thoughts wandered to Haley. She would be so hurt if she found out that Dean was still sleeping around even though his wife was staying with him.

They had been seperated for the past three years but it didn't count in her book.

Zoe was sure that Haley would be seeing it that way, too.

"What's taking you so long?" Haley's voice sounded down the corridor, interrupting Zoe's thoughts, and she spun around, desperately thinking of something to say that would keep Haley from walking further into the back.

But it was too late. Haley was already heading her way.

"Those guys are really thirsty. If they don't get..." She broke off without finishing her sentence.

Her smile faltered and her mouth gaped open, a blank expression setting onto her face when she caught sight of Dean and Mandy.

Haley couldn't force herself to look away, her eyes were glued to the scene in front of her.

"Oh... my God!" She finally exhaled when her mind had processed what was actually happening.

Dean let go of Mandy as soon as he heard Haley's voice. He looked over to the open office door and cursed briefly when he saw that his wife and Zoe were standing in the doorway.

Haley looked him straight in the eye and Dean didn't dare to look away. She looked so crushed and it made him wonder why. He had been convinced that she didn't feel anything for him and never had.

But her reaction seemed so real, so genuine that it couldn't be an act. Dean found himself slowly beginning to hope that she was telling the truth. That maybe their marriage had been real and she never meant to hurt and betray him.

But before he could decide which was the appropriate way to react, Haley broke their eye contact and stormed off.

Dean's heart started to ache as he watched her run away. It was indeed not an act; he had really hurt her, he could feel it. And now he felt bad.

He cleared his throat and ran a hand through his hair, still looking at the spot where Haley had stood not even a second ago.

Then he focused his attention on Zoe. The girl shot him a disgusted and angry look and took off, running after Haley.

Dean took in a deep breath and exhaled it again.

Mandy chuckled, amused. "What the hell is wrong with those two?"

"I have to get back to work." Dean snarled without looking at her. He was pissed and he wanted her out of the room to finally be alone with his confusing thoughts. He had a lot to think about.

"Come on, I'm sure it can wait." Mandy said and ran a hand over his chest, smiling up at him.

Dean shot her such a menacing look that Mandy almost flinched as she took a step away from him.

But she quickly recovered and walked past him with a pout. "You can be such a jerk sometimes, Winchester!" She exclaimed and slammed the door shut behind her.

Dean sighed and sat back down in his chair behind the desk. "Yeah, I know." He whispered quietly into the silence of the office.

Haley's hands were shaking as she tried to splash some water on her face to calm herself. She was fighting back the tears but she knew she was losing that battle; the cold water didn't help and in the next moment her heartbreaking sobs sounded through the silence of the empty restroom.

Haley allowed herself to break down and she wasn't ashamed of it. Sitting on the cold tiled floor, she buried her hands in her hair and listened to the echo of the sounds she was making as she cried her heart out.

She had just found out that her husband didn't care about her at all. She had assumed that he was sleeping with other women, but she hadn't thought he was insensitive enough to do it practically in front of her.

And seeing it with her own eyes hurt more than she had ever imagined. The door to the office had been wide open, anyone could have walked into the back and seen them. He had known that and yet he didn't give a fuck.

For a second Haley thought that he might have done it on purpose, that he had expected her to walk in and catch him in the act with Mandy.

Haley feared that the image was going to stay forever on her mind; it had burned itself into her brain and she couldn't shake it.

She still saw Mandy almost lying on the desk and Dean standing between her legs, pressing her well-built body down onto the desk top as his hands roamed and groaped down her figure.

How could he do that to her? If he didn't love her, didn't he still have some sort of feelings for her?

Haley came to the realization that Dean must've been playing a game with her.

She had dared to hope that they were going to be back together soon but now it looked like he was only screwing with her head.

Haley wiped the tears away, getting angry. If that was the case, then she couldn't do anything about it. She had to accept the fact that Dean didn't want her anymore.

She got up from the floor and checked her appearance in the mirror above the sink. She wiped the dark traces of mascara off her cheeks and ran her fingers through her hair; she looked okay, no one would notice that she had been crying in the darkness of the club.

Haley stepped out of the restroom and saw Zoe leaned against the wall, waiting for her. She smiled weakly at the young girl, hiding how she truly felt. "I'm okay."

"You sure?" Zoe asked, not convinced, and stepped a little closer to inspect her face.

"Yeah, come on. Let's get back behind the bar, that's where we belong anyway." Haley said in a sullen tone, and guided Zoe back inside the club.

Zoe wondered what had been going through her mind to add to the change in Haley's mood, but didn't dare to ask. She sensed that she wouldn't want to talk to her.

For the next thirty minutes Haley did everything automatically, not really focusing on her task as she opened bottle after bottle and poured drinks. She avoided Zoe, and luckily, she didn't try to start a conversation, either.

A guy sat down on an empty stool at the far end of the bar and Haley made her way over to him before he had even made an attempt to get her attention. She was being attentive, concentrated on the customers. The occupation helped her not to think about anything else but work.

"Hi, what can I get you?" She asked with a friendly smile when she had reached him. The man smiled brightly at her, folded his arms on top of the bar and leaned forward.

"Your name and phone number, please." He said and waited for her reaction. Haley was still too shaken up from the event before to catch on.

She frowned, giving him a puzzled look at first before she finally understood his words. She wanted to reply something but he was already speaking again just as she opened her mouth. 

"I'm sorry, I didn't know how to approach you and that was the first thing that popped into my head." He explained sheepishly and Haley couldn't help but chuckle.

"I'm a bartender and instead of ordering a drink and starting a conversation you went with a bad pick-up line?" She shot back, smiling in amusement. The guy was kind of funny and adorable in his own way.

"Was it really that bad?" He laughed nervously.

Haley placed her elbows on the counter and rested her chin in the palms of her hands, happy to have found someone to distract her from everything.

"Well, I've heard worse." She replied, making the guy grin.

"So, does this mean I get a second chance?"

"Sure, why not?" Haley answered. "What's your name?"

"Jack."

"Hi Jack, I'm Haley. And since you're sitting at the bar you might as well order something to drink."

"Yeah, sure. But only beer, please." He said and Haley nodded, opening a bottle and placing it in front of him.

"So, you're new here, huh?" He asked with a smile, growing confident.

"Yeah, this is only my third night working here."

"Mhm, I've been watching you, you know. You're different than all the other girls. You seem out of place."

Haley started to feel insecure at his words. She wasn't sure how to respond.

Jack tilted his head as he studied her; watched her how she swallowed hard before licking her lips, deep in thought. She looked so innocent, but he bet she knew exactly the effect she had on men.

He reached over the counter and brushed her hand with his fingertips and Haley almost flinched. She thought the guy was nice and a little shy, but now he was hitting shamelessly on her.

"You woke my interest, Haley, and I wanted to get to know you. When do you get off?"

"Listen, I..." Haley started, but he interrupted her. "Come on, sweetheart. Don't say no to me. You're so fucking hot and I promise, we're gonna have one hell of a night." He said with a sly smile and when Haley took a step back he quickly grabbed her hand, holding her back.

No, that guy wasn't nice at all.

Dean contemplated whether he should go talk to Haley or not, and came to a decision eventually.

Determined to actually have a civilized conversation with her, he left his office and stepped into the club.

He didn't give a fuck that it was a bad moment; he just couldn't wait until they got home. Dean couldn't stand the thought of her being sad.

He had no idea what the hell he should be going to say to her though. How could he explain what had happened?

He didn't know which were the right words. But it didn't matter -- he would improvise. He was good at that.

When he looked over to the bar and saw Haley with a customer who was friendly, way too friendly with her, he snapped.

That guy -- what was his name again? -- really had the nerve to touch his wife.

Dean recognized him as the man who had told him that his brother had hired another bartender. He was also the one who had wanted the new bartender to wait on them when he and a few other guys had been at the club the night before.

He had had the hots for Haley right from the start. And now he dared to paw his wife at his club!

Dean stormed over to the bar and roughly grabbed Jack's arm, jerking him away from her. Haley sighed in relief; Dean had appeared just in time.

"Oh hey, man! I was just talking to the bartender." He greeted Dean, oblivious to the dangerous glint in his eyes.

Dean smiled crookedly, still keeping a firm hold on him. "Yeah, I can see that."

He turned his head and their eyes locked. "Haley." He simply said and she nodded to him.

She knew that Dean was pissed and she wondered whether Jack was simply stupid or really that blind not to see that Dean was about to rip him a new one.

"We need to talk." Dean said and started to drag him away. "About what?" Jack asked naively and Dean groaned in annoyance. "We have busines to discuss."

Jack frowned. "I thought we've already settled everything and I'm kinda busy talking to this nice girl."

He smirked and raised his eyebrows, signaling Dean that he was about to reel in the hot new bartender and didn't need any distraction.

Dean stared him down until Jack's smirk started to fade. "You can talk to her some other time, pal." He spat through gritted teeth.

What the hell was that jackass thinking? Just because they were involved in some business he was acting as if he owned the place.

Haley looked between the two men and saw that this was the right time for her to jump in. "Actually, I'm pretty busy at the moment and don't really have the time to chat with you any longer."

"There. You heard the lady, let's go." Dean pushed him towards the exit. They stepped outside and Jack turned to Dean, shooting him a glare.

"What the hell, man? I wanted to hit that tonight and you've ruined it for me!"

Dean grabbed him by the throat and slammed him into the wall of the building. Jack tried to free himself but when he saw the look on Dean's face he stopped his pathetic efforts.

"Do not even attempt to talk to Haley again. If I see you somewhere around the bar you'll be dead faster than you can think."

Jack looked at him quizzically before he broke into incredulous laughter. "Are you crazy? What gives you the right to act that way, Winchester? I want that chick and I'm going to get her."

Now it was Dean's turn to chuckle. "No, you're not. And I have every right to be acting that way."

"And why?" Jack asked, amused.

"Because she's mine!" Dean growled close to his face.

Jack was utterly confused at this point.

"Just because you and your brother own this club and she works for you doesn't mean  you get to own her as well. You're an arrogant and sick son of a bitch.You think you can have any woman you want, huh?"

"Okay." Dean chuckled bitterly. "Enough is enough."

Before Jack could have prepared himself for the attack, Dean balled a fist and aimed for his face, hitting his nose. The bone broke from the impact and blood spilled out of the wound.

Jack tried not to panic as he looked at Dean in shock. He didn't dare say anything.

"You're right, Jack. I can have any woman that I want. And I'm especially sensitive when it comes to Haley. You do not want to fuck with me, buddy." Dean threatened, a satisfied smirk on his lips. "Do not touch my wife again or, I swear to God, you're gonna regret it, understand?"

Jack's eyes widened in fear. "What -- ? She's your wife? Man, I had no idea, I... I'm sorry! I would never -- You have to believe me!" He exclaimed desperately.

He didn't want to screw things up with Dean. He and Sam had helped him a lot with his business and he owed the Winchesters a load of money.

So far, they had been very generous and understanding but if he tried to fuck with either one of them they would destroy him in no time. He couldn't afford that.

Dean knew exactly what was going through Jack's mind and why the man decided to apologize to him.

But he knew that from now on, he wouldn't try anything with Haley again. And Dean was very pleased.

"Well, now you do know and I'm sure you wouldn't wanna piss me off, am I right?" Dean's voice turned dangerously low.

Jack nodded frantically. "No, no of course not."

"Good. Now, clean yourself up and fuck off." Dean added coldly and walked back into the club, feeling a little calmer. He had proved his point.

Chapter Text

"Dean, wait! Let's talk about this!" Haley shouted as Dean rushed out of the bedroom and stormed down the stairs.

He needed to get out of the house before he said something he would regret.

He never stopped, even when he heard Haley run into the living room after him. He didn't slow down, proceeded his way to the door.

"Come on, Dean. Stop acting like that." She said sternly and Dean groaned, finally giving up his attempt to escape.

She wanted an argument? Fine, she would get one. Her persistence really annoyed him. He spun around and glared at her.

"What the hell do you wanna talk about, huh? You just told me you're pregnant, so what else is there to discuss?"

It was hard for him to say those words out loud. He still couldn't wrap his mind around the fact that they were going to have a baby.

It scared him. It scared him a lot.

He noticed the gleam in Haley's eyes and he knew he had enraged her with his words.

"I said I think I'm pregnant, but I'm not sure I am. I'm almost two weeks late but it doesn't have to mean anything, I still have to go see my doctor. So, do us both a favour and quit your panic attack." The anger she felt was evident in her voice though Haley tried her best to stay calm.

"So?" Dean spat, getting more irritated with her.

"So?" Haley repeated in frustration, frowning.

Dean sighed and ran a hand through his hair. "It's crystal clear to me. If you're two weeks late, you're pregnant, sweetheart. Let's face it, our lives have already changed." He stated in a patronizing tone and buried his hands in his pants' pockets.

His behaviour was going to drive her crazy; he waited for her reaction. He had felt the need to make her angry and now he got what he wanted.

Haley lost her temper and started yelling at him. "You think I'm not scared? You think I wanted this? We've only been dating for a couple months, this is definitely going way too fast. I'm far from being ready to have a baby!"

Haley's voice was trembling with holden back tears and Dean regretted his words. He knew he should have left before it had gotten that far.

Why did he have to stop? Why couldn't he have just ignored her and walked right out the door like he had wanted to?

But now it was too late. Hurtful words had already been said and though it hurt Dean to see her so miserable, he wouldn't give in.

He kept up his infuriating unamenable attitude and turned his head, looking away. Dean snorted before speaking up again, but he still didn't look at her. "I don't want a baby. I'm not ready for the whole family thing and it wouldn't be fair if I lied and told you I was just to make you feel better."

Haley just shook her head in disbelief and crossed her arms in front of her chest as if to shield herself from him.

Dean watched her take in a deep breath and then heard her mumble quietly. He had to concentrate to make out the whispered words.

"Ever since I realized I could be pregnant I've been scared to death. I hoped you'd take my fears away, that's why I told you about it in the first place. I wished for you to tell me that everything was going to be fine and that we'll get through this together. But now I see it was a mistake, I shouldn't have said anything and waited 'til I knew for sure." Haley broke off and took another deep breath.

Dean swallowed hard, suddenly having a hard time breathing. The hurt and disappointment in Haley's voice cut him deeply.

He couldn't think straight and didn't dare say anything in response. He feared to make it worse between them.

When Haley looked up and their eyes met, the look in her chocolate ones hit him unexpectedly.

"I understand that you're terrified and I don't blame you. What's really hurting me is the fact that you seem to be so appalled by the idea of us being a family."

Dean smiled bitterly and averted his eyes, not able to look at her any longer.

"I'm sorry I can't be the man you want me to be. I'm not father material." He simply said, turned around and left the house.

Dean sighed and ran a hand over his face, forcing himself to wipe out the memory. Why was he torturing himself by reliving that horrible morning?

It was one of the most hurtful fights they had ever had and he had already known back then that he would never forgive himself for the way he had been acting towards Haley.

Even now, after everything that happened, after Haley's deception, he wished he wouldn't have told her he didn't want to have their baby.

Dean leaned back in the chair behind his desk and continued to stare at the golden wedding band on the desk top. He didn't know why he was still holding on to his ring, but he found himself not being able to get rid of it.

"You're such a sentimental idiot, Winchester." He chuckled quietly and closed his eyes.

God, he was so damn tired. He was sick and tired of his dreary life. He was not happy and there was that undefined hole in his gut.

As if he was missing something. Someone.

He wanted a family. He wanted to have children. Realization hit him so hard that he almost fell off his chair.

The problem was, the only woman he could imagine having a family with screwed him over big time.

Once again Dean told himself not to soften, but it was hard not to cave, give in to the temptation and finally forgive her.

He wanted to though. He wanted to erase the past and start all over with her so badly. But he couldn't afford getting his heart broken again. It would be his end.

His thoughts were interrupted by a knock on the door. He shot up and quickly hid the ring in the first drawer of the desk.

No one needed to know what a pathetic softie Dean Winchester really was.

It took Haley an hour to realize that Jack seemed to be gone. After Dean had taken him away to talk to him she had feared he would appear at the bar again. But she didn't see him anywhere, so whatever Dean might have said to him had scared the guy away.

Dean seemed really pissed when he stormed through the entrance and disappeared to his office in the back. And he hadn't shown up ever since. She wondered what was going on with him, how he really felt.

Haley looked up when a tall man came up to her, giving her a friendly smile.

"Mrs Winchester?" He had to shout to drown out the music and noises. His voice was deep and hoarse, as if he had been drinking all night.

Haley took a step back, just in case. The guy knew who she was. Fuck. She was too surprised and terrified to answer.

His appearance was quite impressive, he was almost as tall as Sam. He was smiling, but it still could be a trap.

What could he possibly want from her?

"I'm sorry, the music's really loud. Are you Haley Winchester?" He tried again when he didn't get a response.

At least he was polite, she had to give him that. Haley figured there was no way out for her.

"Yeah, that's right." She breathed out and nodded her head, so he would understand.

An even bigger smile stretched his face now and he grabbed Haley's hand, covering it with his two large ones and shaking it enthusiastically. "It's so nice to finally meet you!"

Haley was speechless. Who the hell was that guy?

"I'm sorry, can I help you with something?" Haley started in confusion and the man let go of her hand.

"God, where are my manners? I'm so sorry. Name's Tom Roberts, I'm here to talk to your husband."

Haley almost wept in relief. He was there to see Dean. Thank God.

"He's in his office, I'll go tell him you're here. Why don't you enjoy a nice beer and the show in the meantime?"

"That would be great, thanks." Tom said and Haley gave him a little smile before turning to leave. She quickly told Zoe to attend to the new customer and headed to the back.

Great. She had to go see him. She had no desire to talk to Dean again after he had made out with that waitress. He had saved her from Jack shortly after that, but still... She felt so awkward. She felt like the good little housewife who had no idea her husband was cheating on her.

Maybe, at this very moment, he was making out with another waitress instead of doing the paperwork. Haley sighed heavily and straightened her shoulders.

She lifted one hand and knocked forcefully on the door and without waiting for an answer, she just stepped inside. Whatever she came upon behind that door, she would be able to deal with it.

She came upon an alarmed Dean. He seemed a little nervous and fidgeted uncomfortably when he saw her walk in.

"Hey." Haley greeted, closing the door. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah, sure. Why?"

Crap. Had she seen the ring?

"What's up?" He asked as casual as possible and walked around the desk, stopping a few feet away from her.

Haley inspected him for a few more seconds. He was definitely putting on an act. She had caught him in a vulnerable moment. She knew him well enough to decipher the expression on his face. But she let it go. It would be for the best if she didn't humiliate him by digging deeper.

"Well, uh... there's someone at the bar who wants to see you. You want me to tell him you're busy or..."

"No, it's okay. I'll go talk to him." Dean answered but remained standing still in front of her, simply looking at her.

Haley folded her hands in front of her body, not sure what to do. Dean's penetrating gaze made her feel uncomfortable and she knew that he knew. But he just smiled at her and didn't avert his eyes.

Just to test her, Dean took a step closer to her and grinned when she almost jumped out of her skin.

Haley was reminded of that morning. The way he had been acting in the kitchen. He obviously loved it to make her nervous but it started to frustrate her.

How was she supposed to react? Was he expecting her to jump his bones whenever he worked his charm on her?

She wanted nothing more than to do exactly that, but she couldn't. Not after she caught him with Mandy.

Haley took in a deep breath when Dean lifted his hand and brushed a strand of hair out of her face. He saw how emotional she was, her feelings were practically tangible in the room. He knew exactly what was on her mind, why she kept her distance.

He hated himself for getting involved with Mandy. He should have kicked her out of the office as soon as she had made her move on him.

Haley saw Dean's smile fade and she wondered what he was thinking about.

"Haley... I'm sorry." He whispered and she quickly looked away. "I didn't want to hurt you. It's not easy for me having you around, I need time."

"This isn't the right place to talk about it." Haley protested. "Tom Roberts is waiting for you."

"Fine, we'll talk at home, then." Dean replied nonchalantly and Haley looked up at him, narrowing her eyes. "No, we won't. I know what I saw, so what else is there to discuss?" She said angrily.

Dean cringed when Haley shot his own words back at him. She didn't know what he had been reminiscing about before she walked into his office. Haley wasn't willing to give him a chance to explain everything and it hurt.

Now he knew what it must have been like for her when he refused to talk to her back then. But he didn't want her to see how her words had gotten to him.

Dean shot her a smug smile and put his hand on the back of her neck. He pulled her roughly to him, kissed her hard.

"We're going to talk about it and you're going to hear me out, sugar."

Haley wanted to slap him.

He shot her another wide smile over his shoulder and left the office, not giving her the chance to protest. Typical.

Haley groaned in frustration and anger, watching him leave. She hated it when he decided over her head.

Sam walked into the quiet and empty club after closing time. It had taken him longer than he had thought to come to an agreement with the people he went to see and now it was already starting to dawn outside.

He sighed heavily when he remembered the business trip he had to go on in the morning. His flight was at nine am and for a second he thought about canceling it, but decided against it.

He would go one last time and send Dean on business trips in the future. It actually wasn't a bad idea. That way, he and Haley wouldn't get to see each other so often.

He smiled when he spotted Haley, being the only person at the place, wiping the dirty counter after the long night.

She looked up and ran around the bar, towards her brother-in-law. Wrapping her arms around his tall form and hugging him tightly. Sam felt all warm inside at her loving welcome.

Haley was more than glad to see Sam again after that crappy day. Being around a moody Dean the whole night had been exhausting.

"It's so good to see you, Sammy." She mumbled into his chest, making him laugh.

"It's good to see you, too."

Dean walked into the main room of the club and caught his brother and wife smiling and laughing. He felt a sharp sting at the sight but pushed it down, tried to ignore it.

Sam noticed his brother coming out of the office and the expression on his face said everything. He quickly let go of Haley and turned to him.

"Hey." He said in a friendly tone, not to upset him even more. "Everything went great. They sold us the place."

Dean nodded and looked from Sam to Haley and back. "Took you longer than I thought. Any problems?"

"Nothing I couldn't handle. It took a lot of... persuasion though." He answered carefully. He didn't want to say too much in front of Haley. "What about you? Did you fire Mandy?"

Dean closed his eyes and exhaled a breath. "Fuck! I totally forgot about that."

"What? How?" Sam demanded.

Haley let out an irritated growl and crossed her arms in front of her chest. "Well, what did you expect? He was too busy shoving his tongue down her throat."

Sam gave her a puzzled look. Her tone scared him a little. He turned to Dean who was glaring at Haley.

"Thanks a lot, sweetheart. That's not the whole story."

"Oh yeah, right. I totally forgot to tell you how he was fucking her on the desk when I walked into the office and caught them. If that's called 'firing someone' nowadays, then I want to get fired everyday, please." Haley said sarcastically.

"What?" Sam repeated again and looked at Dean, who was visibly pissed off at this point.

"I didn't fuck her." He said through gritted teeth.

"Oh please. Two seconds later and I would've walked in on you two..." Haley trailed off when her voice betrayed her. She was exhausted and didn't have the strength to keep up the useless fight.

Silence filled the room until Sam chimed in. "It's late, we're all tired and need to go home. Let's discuss this later, okay?"

"Okay." Dean said quietly and took Haley's hand. "Come on, Haley."

Haley freed her hand from his grip and shot him a look. "No. I'm going with Sam."

Her voice was calm -- too calm -- and it drove Dean crazy. He stood still and waited for her explanation.

"I don't want to fight with you anymore. But we'll be at each other's throats in a second if I come with you."

Dean glared at Sam and he knew his brother would give him a hard time if he didn't help him out.

"Haley..." Sam started and his heart clenched when he saw the vulnerable look in her eyes. She was silently begging him not to give in to Dean's will.

Sam took a deep breath. He told himself it was for the best. "You should go with Dean."

Haley looked down onto the floor and chuckled bitterly. Then, she looked up and locked her eyes with Dean's. She could see them glowing in triumph.

It made her smile. He really hadn't changed and she was surprised to discover how glad she was about that.

Dean always had to have his way and it had always annoyed and turned her on at the same time.

She was just so damn attracted to that man and it scared her as she realized how pissed off she was yet still wanted to jump his bones. Haley quickly reminded herself of the reason why they were fighting, so she wouldn't soften.

"Alright." She simply said and turned around, heading outside. Dean shot Sam a very pleased smile and followed her.

Sam sighed, running a weary hand through his hair. Those two would give him his first heart attack at the age of thirty.

Chapter Text

Dean was very pleased with himself when he stepped out of the club and got into his car. The smile of a conqueror playing on his lips, he watched Haley take a seat on the passenger side. Once again he had gotten what he wanted. Anything else was unacceptable.

But he knew that Haley wasn't too happy about his caveman behaviour and he was smart enough not to ruin everything between them by making a comment. Although he wanted to finally talk to her and explain the thing with Mandy, he was going to wait until they got home.

Haley tried not to look Dean's way, not wanting to see the look on his face. If she looked at him, she would want to wipe that satisfied grin off his face. So she kept glancing out the window on her side, ignoring the hurricane of emotions inside of her.

She was hurting. She hated the way Dean was acting. He obviously still cared about her even though he had a problem keeping his hands to himself. Haley sort of understood that he had a hard time letting her in again but she couldn't forgive him for hurting her on purpose.

An image of Dean and Mandy appeared in front of her eyes and she had to blink a few times to hold the burning tears back and push the memory out of her mind. She wished for him to simply take her back and start all over with her again.

But apparently, Dean needed to make her suffer a little. He hated her and wanted to punish her for the way she still made him feel.

The thought was unbearable and Haley began to fear that she wasn't strong enough to hold out for him any longer, although she had vowed to herself not to give up until she had her husband back.

Repeating that line like a mantra in her head, Haley found the strength to pull herself together. She wasn't going to back down. Not ever. She knew her husband better than anyone else and she was going to win him back. And as long as he was hers again in the end, she somehow had to learn to deal with his countless flings until that day arrived.

Even though it was painful and excruciating.

Haley was too lost in her inner struggle to notice that they were pulling up in front of the house. Dean parked the Impala in the driveway and a silence set between them, filled the inside of the car. It was only interrupted by a clicking sound as the engine cooled off.

Dean saw the deep frown on Haley's usually carefree face and he wondered what was going through her mind. A strange pull from inside his chest made him reach out and take her hand gently in his. He recognized that feeling as worry.

Dean was surprised; he hadn't worried about someone in a long time. He never had a reason to. He couldn't even remember what it was like to feel that way but he quickly discovered that he didn't like that particular emotion. It made him feel vulnerable and uncomfortable, so he focused on holding Haley's soft, small hand and ignored his emotional turmoil.

Dean's hand was big and warm and a little calloused; every spot was so damn familiar. She still remembered all the ways those hands used to touch her. A little fireball seemed to explode inside her as she reminisced about the past. Especially their wedding night came to her mind and she had to gasp for air, her face turning red.

Haley looked down; her hand fit perfectly into Dean's large one and she felt safe and protected. A little smile crept upon her face at Dean's loving and caring touch. To her, it was a sign. A sign that he was slowly beginning to get involved with her for real.

Dean slowly caressed the back of her hand, his fingertips running lightly over her smooth skin. His thumb swept over the palm of her hand and when he felt a rough spot, kind of like a cut, he frowned. He was sure that it hadn't been there before. He knew that Haley's skin was perfect; the memory of her soft and smooth hands wandering down his body was edged onto his mind.

He looked down and turned her hand to inspect her palm. There was a fine and pale but still visible white scar running across the palm of her hand, about two Inches long.

Dean was shocked, but then suddenly it hit him -- what Sam had tried to tell him about Haley's past. But he couldn't think clearly; the only thing that he remembered from their conversation was prison.

Haley had been to prison, that was what Sam had found out about her. Now he found himself wondering what had actually happened to his girl and what she had to go through. Maybe it was the truth and she wasn't lying to him after all. Maybe she was still the girl he fell in love with almost six years ago. Either way, someone had hurt her, scarred her, and he knew it was partly his fault, too.

He shouldn't have let her father drag her away and out of his life. She had begged him not to let her go with him, to believe her that she hadn't been a part of their devilish plan, that she had never meant him any harm. But Dean wouldn't listen. He had been too preoccupied with his own pain; the stinging and hot feeling of being deceived and betrayed.

Dean swallowed hard and looked Haley in the eyes. He saw the panic and fear in them before she broke the eye-contact again. And that was when he knew for sure -- Haley had been through hell and back.

He lifted her hand and placed a tender and sweet kiss onto her palm, his lips lingering on the scar and trying to erase the pain that Haley had felt three years ago when the blade of a butcher's knife had penetrated her skin and left that mark to remind her of the day forever.

Haley panicked when Dean discovered the scar. She feared he would start asking questions; questions about her past which she wasn't ready to answer yet. She was too scared to talk about the past three years, but what terrified her the most was Dean's reaction. He would think it was one of her heartbreaking stories, one of her tricks to manipulate him again. He wouldn't believe her, so there was no use in telling him anything.

She let out a sigh in relief when he didn't say anything and simply kissed her hand instead. That gentle action stirred something inside of her and yet again, she felt hot tears stinging her eyes. When Dean locked his eyes with hers again, she was lost.

"I'm sorry, baby." His deep voice broke the silence between them and somehow the distance, too.

"For what?" She asked wearily, her voice barely audible.

"For not being around to protect you."

At hearing those words, one single tear escaped her eyes and fell down her cheek. Haley wasn't able to fight her feelings any longer. She had so much love for that man. If only he could be ready to accept it again.

Dean was shaken to the core; that one single tear caused his heart to rip a little.

Haley took in a deep breath and leaned in, lightly pressing her lips to his. She needed him so much, she needed to feel that he was really there.

Her heart beat quickly in her chest when she felt him respond. His hand moved to her face and held her firmly in place as he deepened their kiss. His lips moved slowly against hers, yet it wasn't a sweet kiss.

Haley felt the possessiveness and urge to claim pouring off of him and she didn't fight him. She was too overwhelmed by her emotions and simply succumbed to his demanding lips. Dean groaned when Haley practically melted in his arms and he knew that her reaction was real. She wasn't putting on a show for him, this time he was sure. This was the real Haley.

Dean was the first to finally break the kiss; he felt how he was starting to feel hope, and he quickly let go of her. He couldn't trust her completely, at least not yet.

He smiled at her, covering up his own emotions whereas hers were written all over her face.

Haley brushed a loose strand of hair nervously out of her face and looked out the windshield. The sunlight slowly fought its way through the darkness of the night, announcing the new day that was about to begin.

Haley was tired; she had the feeling she was about to break down under the weight of her weak state at any moment. It would be for the best if she just stepped out of the car and headed straight to bed. But Dean's next words made her stop and triggered another avalanche of emotions that threatened to bury her.

"I'm sorry about the whole Mandy thing. I didn't mean for you to walk in on us." Dean said softly, his hand running through her hair. He wanted to clear the air between them, but Haley's reaction showed him that he had chosen the wrong words.

She shot him a look; the pain shone through her eyes and Dean felt like a complete ass. Before he got the chance to hold her back, Haley had already opened the car door, stepped out, and was rushing towards the front door. Dean cursed under his breath, not realizing his mistake, and jumped out of the car, following her inside.

He was growing irritated again. He had no idea why Haley wouldn't want to talk to him. She was the one who had betrayed him, so what gave her the right to get so upset?

And yet -- there he was, running after her to apologize. She always made him feel like an insensitive and clumsy jerk who always seemed to screw up.

"Damn it, Haley!" Dean shouted through the house. Haley didn't stop. But he was faster and caught up with her in the hallway and grabbed her wrist just in time before she could have disappeared upstairs.

Haley spun around on the first step of the staircase and glared at him, trying to shake his hold off. "Let go of me!"

"No, we're going to talk about this. What the hell is your problem?" Dean yelled, losing his temper. His hold tightened on her and he pulled her close to his chest, wrapping his left arm around her waist.

Haley gasped for air when her body collided with his chest. Her heart started to race at the contact, even though there was nothing sexual about the way he was holding her. He just wanted to stop her from running off. Haley knew that the situation could career out of control in seconds because Dean was really mad.

She looked up into his eyes and saw the blazing-green fire. Quickly, she averted her eyes from the intensity, biting down on her bottom lip. He made her nervous for more than one reason at this point. Avoiding eye-contact, she finally gave an answer.

"I'm your wife, Dean. We haven't been together for a while now, but it doesn't mean you can just ignore this little fact. And it hurts, it hurts very much that you seem to think I wouldn't care. I do care and it's hard for me to get over what I saw. A simple apology doesn't cut it."

With every said word Dean got only more enraged until he exploded by the end of Haley's speech. He pushed her away and took a few steps back, needing to distance himself.

She stumbled and gripped the bannister for support, saving herself from falling. She didn't dare to move and remained standing quietly, anticipating Dean's outburst.

"Don't you dare turn this around on me! We've been separated this whole time, you said so yourself. This marriage exists only on paper, a pain-in-the-ass of a formality. You and I, sweetheart, we're so fucking over. So don't call me a cheating husband, 'cause there's no fucking wife to be cheating on!"

Dean's breathing was hot and heavy, he stood in front of her with his hands on his hips. His eyes never left her. He was scared and hurt. Their conversation had turned into a fight; not what he had planned. And he hated it when something didn't go according to his plan.

"It's not like you haven't been with another man. Three years is a long time, sweetheart." He added a little calmer, but those words were meant to provoke her, to force a reaction out of her. He needed her to yell back at him and add fuel to their fight.

It surprised him when Haley simply closed her eyes, sat down on the first step of the staircase and covered her face with her hands. Dean expected her to cry, but when she locked her eyes with his, he saw that she was just tired.

"You're right." She whispered and Dean raised one eyebrow. "It's just... it's past five in the morning and I can't think straight anymore. Let's continue fighting later, okay?"

"I hate it when you do that." Dean replied with a sigh. What was she doing to him? She had just taken the wind out of his sails and he was a little lost.

"Do what?"

"Agree with me."

Haley couldn't help but chuckle at his answer. "You know what I'm here for, Dean."

"You want us to be together again." Dean gave a crooked smile that was more like a grimace, and looked away from her. Letting out a snort, he shook his head in disbelief. "Yeah, right."

His tone was so indignant, but Haley ignored it and told herself to stay calm and get through to him. "We've been good together, don't you think so?"

"Yeah, I'd thought so, too, until I woke up one morning and realized my sweet little wife is not so sweet. You used me, sweetheart. Our relationship's been a fucking lie!"

Haley just shook her head. "No, it wasn't. I married you because of you and not because it was part of an evil plan to ruin you." She broke off, not sure how to go on.

"Dean... I'd already stopped spying on you by the time of our wedding because I'd fallen in love with you." Her voice was soft and her words sounded so genuine, but Dean didn't allow himself to give in. He kept his walls up, fought down the urge to forgive her. When she spoke up again, his head started to spin at her words.

"I still am." Haley murmured and Dean was too overwhelmed at first to catch on.

"What?"

Haley took a deep breath before repeating the declaration of love. It was hard to confess your love to a man who hated you. But Haley was brave and didn't back down.

"I love you. I'm still in love with you, Dean. And I need my husband back."

Dean turned his back on her. He was too emotional and he shielded himself from Haley and his own feelings. He was too confused to think straight.

He had to say something, to respond somehow. He had to tell her that he still loved her, too. But he couldn't.

"You're not my wife. The woman I married doesn't exist." His tone was resigned. When he turned back around to face her, the expression on his face was unreadable.

"You had made up a certain type of woman, the type I'd fall for. But it's not who you are for real."

"What?" Haley exclaimed, leaping up. "Is that what you really think of me?" She shouted in  desperation. She couldn't believe it. Dean thought her personality was fake?

Suddenly, the tiredness was gone and she was simply pissed at him.

"I'm friggin' real, Dean Winchester! We've been living together for almost two years under the same roof and now you're telling me I'm a stranger to you, that I've been faking it? Are you crazy? I have never let anyone into my life like that! You know me better than anyone else, for God's sake!"

Dean felt a sharp pain in his chest -- he stormed out of the hallway, running into the kitchen in need of an escape.

He couldn't stand being so close to her; he needed space because he could feel how he was softening. Her words had slowly started to sneak their way back into his heart.

Haley sprinted after him, now persistent to keep up the fight. "My love for you has always been real!"

"Why should I believe you?" Dean yelled, abruptly turning towards her when she burst into the room.

Haley couldn't keep her composure any longer and broke into tears, started to cry in front of him. "You don't have to. But nothing's changed, I'm still the same person. And I'm not asking you to trust me. Just..." Her voice broke and she had to clear her throat.

Dean stepped closer to her but didn't dare to touch her. Haley looked up at him, her tears trickling down her cheeks, ripping further into his heart.

"Just... just don't punish me, please. You can be with whoever you want to be, but I really can't handle walking in on you a second time. Don't do that to me again, okay?"

"Haley..." Dean whispered quietly. He really didn't know what to do. She had thrown him off guard. He wasn't sure what she was expecting or hoping to hear from him, so he said out loud the first thing that crossed his mind.

"I'm really sorry for everything. You showed up again and -- and turned everything upside down, and I don't know how to feel about it or what I'm supposed to do with you." Dean smiled a lopsided smile, but still kept his distance.

"If you want me to, I'll go. I don't mean to cause you any trouble or pain. I want you to be happy."

"No!" Dean shouted in protest, not even thinking twice. He might not trust her, but he didn't want her to go. It was the only thing he was certain of.

"Don't go." He repeated again when he saw the surprised look on her face. He finally moved towards her and took her in his arms, buried his face in the crook of her neck, in her soft hair.

"I'm not going to watch you leave again. Stay." He whispered as held her tightly.

Haley couldn't breathe. She froze in his embrace; happy, yet insecure about Dean's reaction.

"Are you sure?" She asked back, giving Dean the chance to revise his decision. "I mean, you're miserable with me around, so --"

"Stay." Dean interrupted her. "Please."

That one word made Haley cry harder and she pressed to his body, holding onto him. Dean kissed her head and stroked her back, comforting her, until she pulled away.

Did he say something wrong? Was she going to leave him again despite his begging for her not to?

Haley noticed that Dean was still upset, so she leaned up and pressed her lips to his mouth, stopping him from picking another fight.

Dean knew they had gotten too close to a very dangerous line between them; he would be lost if he crossed it. He shouldn't kiss her back because this time there would be no way back. He would fall for her. Irreversibly.

But her soft lips were already on his and he wasn't strong enough to resist.

Fuck it.

Dean tilted his head and deepened the kiss when Haley's tongue slipped into his mouth. He ran his hands down her back, grabbed her ass and picked her up. Haley wrapped her legs around his waist and dug her fingers into his shoulders at the sudden movement, whimpering softly.

She wanted to give him a simple kiss and hadn't expected it to turn into more.

She felt the cool surface underneath her and saw that Dean had placed her on the kitchen counter. His hands were everywhere; it was like he tried to trace and feel every inch of her body at once. Haley knew exactly how he felt, she felt the same -- she was also dying to touch him again. It had been so long, way too long, since the last time they had been this close to each other.

So was it really that wrong to give in to the pleasure despite everything that happened between them in the past?

Chapter Text

Dean's breath was hot on her skin, sending shivers up her spine, and his lips left a damp, tingling path as he kissed along her collarbone.

This was not a dream. She was there with Dean, in his house.

Haley had to swallow a couple times, her stomach fluttering with nerves. She truly wanted this, wanted to be close to him but her fear stood in the way and kept her from making a mistake. That moment in the kitchen made her painfully aware of how present her rough past actually was, what impact the hell she had gone through still had on her.

They had just had a huge fight. Dean didn't believe nor did he trust her. That night had dragged on, turning from bad to worse, and now they were in the kitchen at five in the morning, both on edge and way too riled up.  

It was too much. Way too fast. And if she gave in to him now, because she missed him so badly, it would be over way too soon and Dean would hate her even more than he already did. Haley didn't want their reunion to be a quick, rough and angry fuck. 

She felt him push between her thighs, felt his erection against the seam of her jeans and his hands on her naked skin, stroking up her sides under her shirt.

When Haley tensed up in his embrace, Dean stopped kissing her neck and lifted his head to look at her face. He kept his arms still wrapped securely around her, holding her close to his chest as he stood between her legs. She had kissed him back with the same urgency and vigour, grabbing fistfuls of his shirt, digging her fingers into his skin as if she couldn't bring him close enough, and reciprocated his kisses. Now she seemed distant and small as she looked up at him with chocolate brown, blood-shut eyes. 

"Haley..." He said her name softly. There was a vulnerability about her that he had never seen before and it scared him, it scared him a lot.

"I'm sorry..." Haley whispered weakly, trying to smile but failing miserably. "I'm so sorry, Dean."

Haley's skin felt scorching hot through the layers of clothing; his pants were too tight and his erection straining against the material. He shook his head briefly and tried to get his breathing under control, to think clearly.

He wasn't sure what to do. Haley was upset and it was because of him. It reminded him of that day in the club when she had reacted in the same way. What was he supposed to do to help her now?

Haley made a move to free herself from his arms and hop off the counter, but he tightened his grip on her just a little to hold her back. He put his hand to her cheek and pressed a kiss to her forehead, taking her aback.

"Talk to me." He demanded in a barely audible whisper.

Tears stung Haley's eyes, but she didn't allow herself to cry. Dean seemed so gentle, open and understanding now, but how was he going to react once she'd told him every gruesome detail? She never thought about the years she had to live without him, it hurt too much. Too much had happened.

Haley squeezed her eyes shut and took a deep breath, focusing on the feeling of Dean's hand on her face and the way it made a tingling warmth settle in her chest. 

"I can't." She breathed out, pulled away from him quickly and jumped off the counter. It hurt her deeply to see the pain caused by her rejection on Dean's face. "I'm so sorry, Dean. I never meant for any of this to happen." 

Haley turned around, fleeing from the kitchen and from him. 

Dean remained where he was, standing still with his gaze unfocused and deep in thought. He knew what her last comment meant, and he was inclined to believe her. Haley didn't mean to hurt him. And the way she froze in his arms when he got physically too close ... He felt a nasty feeling in the pit of his stomach laced with boiling anger come over him.

Who had hurt her? What had happened to Haley because he wasn't by her side? 

For the first time since Haley had gotten back into his life Dean saw a part of the bigger picture. Haley's uncharacteristic behaviour, the skittishness and tension in her body, should've been alarming to him, but he had been too preoccupied with his own pain.

Was Haley still running from the person who had hurt her? Was her past catching up with her and she had sought out Sam to keep her safe? 

Dean pondered the extent of danger that his wife was in; it was unnerving. He didn't take it lightly, assuming that he was right to fear for her safety.
He needed to talk to his brother. It was about damn time he got to the bottom of this. 

She was not pregnant.

Haley leaned against her car in the parking lot to regain her composure after her doctor's appointment. Somehow she wasn't as relieved as she should have been, or as she had hoped to be. Still pretty shaken up, hands trembling slightly, and more upset than she cared to admit to herself. But why? It was false alarm just like she had told Dean and they both could breathe again now and forget about this little incident.

But instead she was miserable, confused and lonely. A small, miniscule part of her had hoped for the doctor to tell her the opposite; she had wished to be pregnant. Haley let out a heavy sigh, shaking her head softly at the realization.

What the hell was wrong with her? She had known that man for only a few months and was already fantasizing about having kids with him? But she couldn't help it. Haley had wanted children for quite some time now and Dean was the only man that she could imagine herself raising kids with. The thought made her sad. Dean was not ready for children, for a family -- he had communicated that pretty clearly. And she had to accept it.

Reluctantly, Haley straightened her back and opened the door to her car, getting into the driver's seat and heading home to tell Dean the news that would finally let him off the hook.

Haley shook her head to make the bleak memory disappear as she stared at the ceiling above her bed. It was almost six in the morning and she had a hard time falling asleep. She was still upset about her argument with Dean and the scene that had followed in the kitchen as an encore, but she was missing Dean at the same time. She needed him so much; the longing for him pressed like an invisible weight onto her chest, almost like a tangible physical pain.

And now her vicious mind had taken advantage of her weak state to conjure up those images from their past life together. Why did her thoughts have to drift to that particular moment of all moments? It had been a long time ago and she didn't want to dwell on something that was most likely not going to happen for her. Haley was far away from the point of having children in her life.

But as it already dawned outside and she couldn't switch off her thoughts and force her mind to rest, she was trapped within her memories. So she decided to give in, allow herself to reminisce about the past and her thoughts wandered back to one of the best moments of her life...

When Haley got home Dean was already waiting for her and quite agitated, pacing the living room. As soon as she walked through the front door he stormed towards her and pulled her into him, wrapping her in a tight embrace. 

"I'm an idiot, and I love you." He announced, pressing a long, hard kiss to her lips. Haley let out a surprised laugh and gave him a little, but warm smile.

"I panicked and overreacted and I'm so sorry for that. But you and I, we're going to be a real family, sweetheart, I promise. You can't leave me, I won't let you."

"Dean..." 

Haley saw the crease between his eyebrows, the clench of his jaw, the flicker of hope in his beautiful green eyes as he looked at her, waiting for her reaction. His confession was genuine. Dean had probably never been this honest with her and she knew it took a lot for him to say those words.

"I just had my doctor's appointment -- you know what, let's sit." She took him by the hand and guided him over to the couch. When Dean sat down next to her, he shifted closer to the edge of the seat, barely keeping still.

"Everything's fine, we're off the hook, honey. I'm not pregnant."

Dean didn't know how to respond, desperately seeking for the right words in this situation. And then Haley's smile dropped and she looked down into her lap, rubbing her thumb over a barely visible coffee stain on her skirt that she had just noticed for the first time.

Dean frowned and leaned closer to her, asking softly, "Babe, are you okay?"

"Yeah, of course, baby.... no, not really." She said, getting up and taking a few steps through the room. She turned around to look at him. After he had been so honest with her he deserved the truth.

"I kinda wanted to be pregnant.I know, it's stupid." 

"No, it's not. Not at all." Dean reassured her confidently, and walked over to her. His lips parted and he took a breath as if he wanted to say something. He paused for a second and then said, "You want kids, I get it."

Haley looked up at him, and his gaze didn't waver. She nodded quietly.

"Okay... okay. But can we -- can we wait a little before we get them?" Dean asked, chuckling nervously.

He was not sure whether it was an appropriate question to even ask. He had no idea how to approach that topic with Haley. A bright smile appeared on her face.

"Are you for real?" She whispered in disbelief, loosely wrapping her arms around his waist. "Of course we can wait, baby. I'd never rush you."

Upon hearing her answer, Dean relaxed visibly. He attacked her with his dazzling smile. His big, warm hand moved slowly up her back and gripped the nape of her neck, his fingers pushing into her hair. And Haley shuddered.

"You know, if you want we can start practicing for a rugrat now. I wouldn't mind." He joked, but his lips brushed that weak spot behind her ear, his warm breath tickled her skin.

"You lost your mind, Winchester?" She whispered playfully, but with no fire behind the words.

"Maybe. But after our fight this morning... It got me thinking and I... Haley, I want you to stay with me." 

He got serious again, the seductive playfulness gone. Haley's heart was beating rapidly in her chest. She couldn't breathe anymore.

"Well, I know it's not the best moment, but..." Dean pulled out a small black box out of his pants' pocket and opened it to reveal a diamond ring. "Will you marry me?"

"Dean... I -- " 

"I'm not asking you to marry me just because I thought you were pregnant.I want you to be my wife because I love you, Haley." He cut her off in a hurry to elaborate on his proposal before she could turn him down. "The pregnancy scare and our fight put that into perspective for me. I want to be with you."

"Wow." Haley exhaled a breath and looked up at him, nodding. "One condition."

"Anything. But you're scaring me, sweetheart."

"It's not that bad. Don't you dare take off after a fight like that ever again. Okay? This relationship is not going to work if we don't talk."

" Of course. I promise I'll try and be the best version of myself for you, sweetheart." There was a glint of hope and excitement in his eyes. 

"Me too. Then yes, I'll marry you." She grinned happily, jumping up into his arms. Dean caught her and held her close as she wrapped her arms around his neck and kissed him.

Dean climbed out of bed groggily, feeling like he hadn't got sleep for even a minute. The intense confrontation with Haley had been an emotional rollercoaster. It had taken its toll and now he was paying the price for being weak, for allowing his feelings to control him. But it was a new day and he had work to do. 

Dean shuffled into the bathroom to take a shower that would hopefully help him clear his head.

I promise I'll try and be the best version of myself for you, sweetheart. He had been thinking about Haley -- again. She was constantly on his mind. Fucking hell.

Lately, the day he proposed to her had been haunting him. After the horrible fight because of a pregnancy scare that day had ended with an engagement in the best possible way for them. Six weeks later they were married. It was spontaneous, impulsive. Crazy. 

But they were so happy and in love and the thought of a break-up seemed surreal; it was an odd option far off in a distant future that could never be their reality.

Now standing under the shower Dean wondered if Haley ever thought about their engagement, too. It was a significant day that turned out to be kind of the beginning of the end to their life together. 

Haley claimed to love him, and it made him angry, scared, confused and insecure. But he still wanted to love her back. He feared to succumb to her charms like the first time they met. He turned weak next to her; she made him weak and Dean knew that. So he had to keep his distance.

Dean reminded himself to take it one step at a time. He was going to find out everything about Haley's past first. And then he could still decide what to do about his own stupid feelings. 

Sick and tired of himself, of the whole situation, he shook off all thoughts of his wife and crossed the hallway wet and naked as he was, leaving drops of water behind him on the hardwood floor. In his bedroom, he quickly got dressed and ran his fingers through his wet hair before heading downstairs.

His brother and Haley were sitting at the kitchen table and discussing his trip.

Dean stopped in his tracks and clenched his teeth, holding back the groan in his throat. He had completely forgotten about Sammy's business trip thanks to the latest events.

Great.

Sam would be gone for the next few days, maybe even a whole week, which meant he and Haley would be alone. He wasn't ready to stay with her in his house like a married couple again - just the two of them.

You're scared of your own wife, Winchester. The thought made him chuckle.

"Well, aren't you in a good mood today, huh?" Sam got up from his chair and walked over to the counter to pour another cup of coffee. "And why wouldn't you be? You're not the one who has to take care of annoying business details."

"Hey, you dig flying so much," Dean replied innocently with a shrug, "Wasn't my idea to get another state involved, I'm happy to take care of anything local, brother. But hey, if you insist, I'll drive all the way up there -- "

"I got it. Just shut up." Sam rolled his eyes, shaking his head at his older brother.

Haley hid her smile behind her mug. It was nice to see the brothers' banter. They seemed somewhat comfortable around her -- it felt like they were making progress.

"You got everything?" She asked Sam after a glance at the clock. It was time for him to get to the airport.

"Yeah, don't worry." Sam said, giving her a smile. "I'll try to get back before I'm running out of clean underwear."

Haley let out a loud laugh, which was only a little forced. They walked out of the kitchen and into the hall with Dean following close behind.

Sam stopped at the front door, looking back and forth between his brother and Haley. He hated the idea of them being stuck together for days with the past between them like a fortress, keeping each one from the other. Especially after the previous night. Sam had overheard snippets of their ugly argument in the kitchen when he had walked into the house a few minutes after them. He had disappeared upstairs quietly to give them privacy, but also because he didn't want to witness anything.

Sam stared at Haley intently, wondering whether it was safe to leave her there with Dean. She seemed tired, with dark circles under her eyes. When she smiled at him he leaned down to hug her.

"Call me if he's giving you a hard time." He whispered softly, making Haley laugh quietly into his chest as she hugged him back. It sounded like a joke but she knew Sam was truly worried for her. And his brother.

Haley stepped aside and watched Sam and Dean exchange a brotherly hug.

"Something doesn't go according to plan at the club..." Sam started, one hand on the door knob.

"...I'll give you a call." Dean finished the sentence. "Don't worry, Sammy. It's gon' be fine, I've got it covered."

Dean could see it in his brother's eyes how uncomfortable he felt about leaving him with his estranged wife. 

And he's right to worry. Dean sighed heavily; God knows what could happen between them while Sam was gone.

"Okay, you two. Behave." And just like that, Sam was out the door.

Dean and Haley were left standing in the hallway. With the jarring sound of the door shutting closed, a dead silence settled between them and tension flickered in the air.