Archive of Our Own ^beta

They’ve never been here. Not really. Sometimes in daydreams and fantasies, but that’s what they were. Just all in their head. Now, however, after some persuasion from the goddess among them, Penelope successfully dragged Reid out to the bar. And after a while Morgan drove them home. They were sober. Spencer wasn’t one for drinking, and Derek was the designated driver, so they both stayed sober while their friends released themselves of sobriety.

“What’s going on in that big ol’ brain of yours, pretty boy?” Derek looked over to Spencer as he pulled into the doctor’s driveway. “Everything alright up there?” He reached over, booping Spencer’s nose with the tip of his finger, while the youngster just stared ahead.

“Do you... do you believe in the two genders theory?” They asked, not once lifting their eyes off the building wall in front of the car. Morgan dropped his hand, taking Spencer’s into his own.

“Short answer?” He hearted, making the genius look over and shrug. Any answer, he read the expression on their face. “No.” He nodded, looking away for a second before looking back into Spencer’s eyes. “Actually, I’ve uh... been meaning to talk to someone about that...” he scoffed, avoiding his friends gaze once more, not being able to return to it this time, so instead, Morgan looked at where Spencer’s eyes had been previously fixated.

“Yeah, me- me too...” Spencer scoffed, as they poked holes on the side of their friend’s face with their eyes. “Derek I’m...” he trailed off, raising worry on the colleague that sat beside them, making him look back at Spencer again. “I’m non-binary...” they said voice barely audible, only slightly above a whisper. Derek squeezed their hand, giving them a warm smile and a nod. “I uhm... I use they-them, pronouns...” they kept going, a little less tense then before, but still nervous.

They didn’t have to worry, they were aware. But that didn’t stop them. Because what if Derek, though accepting of the possibility of someone not falling into boy/girl gender spectrum, might not be too eager to accept that someone being his friend. They looked over at Morgan to catch the end of what sounded like a happy sigh. They noticed the way Dereks eyes flickered between their own, from one to the other, while a smile broke out on his lips.

“I’m uh...” he hesitated, looking down at his free hand, before looking back up at his best friend’s eyes. “I’m genderfaun!” He watched as Spencer’s face lit up like a christmas tree. “I’d say ‘you probably haven’t heard of it’ but you’re kind of a genius, so...” he continued with a playfully mocking eye roll and a smirk as they both chuckled lightly. As their laughter died down a little, Derek took that opportunity to finish. “I uhm-“ he swallowed before he continued. “I use he-him and they-them, and though I’m more... masc presenting, occasionally I like to uhm... explore more of my androgynous side...” he kept pausing in between his sentence, trying his best to find the right words.

He looked over to find Spencer biting at the inside of their lip, trying to suppress a smile. The young doctor nodded at Derek as they both smiled. Morgan let out a puff of air he hadn’t realized he was holding, and loosened his grip on Spencer’s hand.

“We ok?” He asked, looking down lightly, trying to hide the slight blush that crept onto his face. “We’re ok, right?” He looked back up, remembering the dimly lit atmosphere hid his redness for him.

“Yeah...” Spencer breathed out, rubbing their thumb over Derek’s knuckles where the agents still held hands. “Yeah we’re all good!” The brightest smile was still shining bright on their face before they changed the conversation slightly. “Do you uhm... do you wanna come upstairs... for a little bit, maybe we could...” -they fiddled with Morgan’s base knuckles before continuing- “...talk... some more?”

Derek smiled at that, looking over at them fondly. “I’d love that, pretty thing!” Spencer looked over at him suddenly, a few butterflies flapping around in their stomach, as they gasped at the nickname change.

Though they’ve both been here in their heads, it wasn’t nearly as welcoming as right now. Feeling accepted and not as alone anymore, they knew they’d always have each other. Even if they weren’t ready for the rest of the world, they knew they’d always find love and acceptance in each other’s arms, and maybe, for now, that would be enough.