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Chapter Text

It was a warm summer's day accompanied by a cool, gentle breeze that blew away the heat from the skin. The day was practically perfect. The Wind Pillar was on his way to the courtyard of their master when he stumbled upon the one man in the world he could absolutely not stand. Giyu Tomioka was standing underneath a mighty wisteria tree when the white-haired hashira turned the final corner. The hanging vines of flowers covered the other warrior before revealing him like flowing curtains in a window. He was inspecting something on the dark trunk of the tree, and appeared oddly entranced by whatever it was. Curiously, Sanemi snuck behind the fellow hashira to try to discover what had caught the attention of Mister Emotionless-And-Uninterested. To his surprise, he found a Japanese Rhinoceros Beetle sitting directly in front of Tomioka, the only movement being the occasional flickering of its wings.

Sanemi couldn’t keep the incredulous look off his face as he held back a loud “huh?”. Don’t be mistaken, there is nothing particularly wrong with being interested in nature, and butterflies, and other earth shit. However, he never expected Giyu of all people to get sidetracked by something so miniscule on the grand scale of things. The Water Pillar hadn’t seemed to notice his presence yet, so he used this time to inspect Mister Emotionless for a head injury. As his eyes traveled over the stoic male’s body, he found them lingering on certain areas. Like his waist, his jawline, his neck, and especially his as-. The Wind Hashira’s eyes snapped open wide enough that he could fit his fist in them. He reeled back in disgust and horror when he realized what he had been doing. Sanemi Shinazugagwa was checking Mister Stoic out like he was a bitch in a brothel.

This baffled the heather-eyed man enough to release a noise of confusion that finally alerted Tomioka of his presence. The Water Hashira turned his head and nodded politely at his comrade before continuing on his journey to their master’s courtyard. The stupidly calm idiot acted like absolutely nothing had just occurred. Like Sanemi hadn’t caught the stoic, Giyu Tomioka, actually interested in something. Throwing one last glance at the seemingly insignificant beetle, the Wind Pillar trailed after the Water Pillar from a distance. Though he tried to shake off the odd new feelings, Sanemi couldn’t force the strange sensenation away as his eyes stared at Giyu’s figure (or just his ass). The white-haired man didn’t exactly do emotions anymore, and he absolutely didn’t participate in love. Which is exactly why he couldn’t figure out why he felt a warmth pool in his cheeks when Tomioka drew to a stop to wait for him to catch up, and why he felt a flutter in his stomach when their eyes met.

Unfortunately, when they pushed open the large gate, everyone else had long since arrived. The problem with this factor was that Sanemi and Giyu were last and they came in together. That didn’t set an innocent picture, especially to someone with a flamboyant mind like Tengen. Said Sound Hashira cheekily smirked at the pair as they walked over.

“Well, well, late today boys,” he stated in a sly, jeering tone. “Get caught up in…other activities?”

Sanemi was about to rudely retort something crude when Giyu opened his dumb mouth first. “We simply arrived at the same time,” he explained in his naturally monotone voice.

“Oh, I see,” the Sound pillar winked, pushing Sanemi’s urge to punch the other white-haired individual even higher.

Sadly, before he could carry out his masterful plan, Ubuyashiki walked out and addressed the now kneeling group before him. To his horror, while their master spoke, the Wind Hashira was staring down the line at the black-haired hashira with a mix-matched haori. Truth be told, it wasn't even himself who pulled his attention back to Ubuyashiki. Obanai, the Serpent Hashira, had harshly elbowed his side about halfway through the meeting. After the discussions were closed, the group went their separate ways once more. Before his journey elsewhere, Sanemi opted to go to the kitchen and see if he could acquire something to eat and fuel his body. Secretly, he hoped there might be some ohagi.

On his way, he ran straight into Giyu, who was coming around the same corner. They collided, which caused the black-haired man to nearly drop his wrapped up bundle. Once he steadied both himself and Tomioka, he shot a glare full of annoyance the other man’s way.

“Watch where you’re going, idiot,” he snapped.

Tomioka’s response was the same as always. A blank dead stare. Deciding he wasn’t going to get any sort of reaction from the Water Hashira, Sanemi began to brush past the other man. His movements were brought to a halt when Tomika unexpectedly called after him.

“Would you like one?” the Water breather asked.

Giyu had unwrapped his parcel. Inside, there were an assortment of fruits and vegetables, and four individually wrapped ohagi. Sanemi raised an eyebrow suspiciously, but the sight of his favorite snack tempted him enough to wander over again.

“Why?” the heather-eyed man asked.

“I thought you liked them,” Giyu said, his voice remaining without emotion.

“I do,” Sanemi said, quickly taking one in fear the other man might begin to cover them again.

Tomioka’s blank gaze suddenly got a glimmer of amusement in them. It was a shocking sight to say the least. The glimmer turned Giyu’s blue irises into pools of deep water that rippled as sakura petals fell upon the surface. Sanemi had to force his own eyes away from the sight.

“Would you like two then?” the Water Hashira asked.

Sanemi’s chest suddenly felt tight, and he felt heat rush to his ears. Quickly, he snatched one more out of the bundle and spun around for a masterful escape. This caused him to miss the smallest of smiles grace Tomioka’s lips. Before he could make it out of hearing-distance, Giyu’s voice caught his ears.

“You know, you have very beautiful eyes,” the Water Hashira complimented before traveling into another building.

The white-haired man froze like ice had grown in his veins. His eyes were…beautiful? A part of him was beautiful? There was no way that was possible. Sanemi looked down at his ugly scarred chest, and remembered how his naturally drier eyes added a crazed appearance to his face. Giyu must have been mistaken, or he was thinking of someone else, because Sanemi was far from beautiful. In fact, the Wind Hashira saw himself as quite disgusting.

Even though Sanemi was in denial of his attractiveness, the drawing towards the Water Hashira never ceased. Sanemi began noticing smaller, seemingly insignificant, things about Giyu. The unnerving factor was they were things that shouldn’t matter in the slightest. For example, how Giyu’s mouth curved into a small smile when he was given a plate of simmered salmon with daikon, or how his own crow made him more nervous than a demon. This attraction wasn’t right. He shouldn’t feel like this for another man, especially someone he was sure he hated up till now. This made it even more difficult to excuse his feelings.

Sanemi was leaving the Butterfly Mansion after receiving one too many nasty hits on a mission when Giyu walked in. The two hashiras ran directly into each other. This resulted in the white-haired man landing on top of the other. In any other circumstance, he might have started yelling at the other person or cursing under his breath, but now he simply stared. He stared deep into the Water Hashira’s eyes, taking in every detail. Giyu’s blue irises seemed to change shades depending on the light, and Sanemi never noticed before how someone could practically drown in the depth of them. The Wind Hashira came to his senses when Giyu cleared his throat.

Quickly, he scrambled off and feigned a cross look. Sanemi even crossed his arms and glared slightly at the other man to add to his performance. However, Giyu simply ignored the faux glare, and stood before dusting himself off. It was slightly infuriating, but mainly embarrassing that Sanemi felt he needed to put on an act in front of the other man. He shouldn’t care what Tomioka thought about him. With an incredulous huff, he brushed past the oher hashira and began to make another escape.

“Watch where you’re going, idiot!” he called back once more, hoping to somewhat seal the masquerade.

“You really do take my breath away.”

Sanemi stumbled and nearly tripped to a stop at the confession. Spinning around, he was disappointed to find that the Water Hashira had already disappeared within the medical mansion. The white-haired man was convinced he had heard his comrade incorrectly. Although, Giyu didn’t come across as the type to speak anything but the truth. In fact, the blue-eyed man rarely uttered a word unless necessary. Which meant Giyu Tomioka honestly viewed Sanemi as beautiful, and the white-haired warrior could truly take his breath away. As blood rushed to his cheeks, flushing them a bright and obvious red, Sanemi Shinazugawa only had one thought running races in his mind. He was in love with Giyu Tomioka.

Chapter Text

Contrary to common belief, Giyu Tomioka wasn’t dim. At least, he wasn’t unknowing in the ways of emotions nor how they worked. He was someone before his demon slayer years just like everyone else. This being said, it was no shock that the Water Hashira eventually caught wind of the other warrior’s attraction towards him. Sanemi was many things, but subtle was not one of them. In the end, Giyu slowly discovered he too shared an attraction for the white-haired man, but he wouldn’t dare act on his feelings. 

The reasoning behind his resolve was simply this: His world wasn’t ready for a couple like them. Two men in love was a foreign concept in his age. The most that was heard of same-sex couples was news of their execution or stoning. It wasn’t safe for people like him and Sanemi, and Tomioka doubted it would ever be while they were alive. 

Even within the corps, it was rare to be in a relationship, and even more so with the same gender. It was dangerous. Giyu knew Sanemi had a younger brother, and even if the other hashira denied it, he knew the Wind Hashira cared deeply for Genya. The mere thought of tearing the two brothers apart by death because he chose to be selfish was shameful. The blue-eyed slayer would never forgive himself if something so horrendous occurred, which is why he chose to remain silent, and to keep his emotions hidden. Even so, he wasn’t perfect, and he still had a couple mishaps. Like telling Sanemi that he took his breath away was a terrible truth that he accidentally blurted out. 

The Water Hashira let out a deep, exhausted sigh as he limped on the side of a dirt path. The bruised warrior was heading home from a mission that had been more difficult than advertised. He was bleeding from three long, jagged scratches across his chest, and his arms and chest burned from using his katana and breathing technique for so long. Giyu was ragged enough to believe he was two steps away from falling asleep on the long dusty road. However, before he could collapse into a deep sleep, someone familiar stumbled upon him. Someone with pearl-like hair and unique heather eyes. 

“You look like demon shit,” Sanemi noticed bluntly.

Tomioka gave him the blankest stare he could muster. “Thank you. I tried my absolute hardest.”

Sanemi cracked a tiny smile that was enough to see. “Since when are you the sarcastic type?” he asked.

“There’s much you don’t know about me. Mainly because none of you bothered learning it,” the raven-haired man replied bluntly.

The Wind Hashira frowned and took in his comrade’s appearance. Giyu had a point. None of the hashira had attempted to get to know the quiet, serious man, and usually turned to assumptions and rumors instead. Sighing, he took the other warrior’s arm and placed it over his shoulders, helping to support Tomioka’s body weight. 

“My place isn’t far,” Sanemi shrugged, trying to force the warmth in his cheeks to cool down.

Giyu gave the other man a doubtful look. Sanemi had never offered a gesture of greeting his way, much less one of aid. Even though he knew of the other man’s attraction towards him, Tomioka initially assumed this would cause Sanemi to become significantly more aggressive towards him. However, his feet felt numb and the rough wrapping he did on his chest was coming loose. Sighing, even though he knew this wasn’t good for either of them, he nodded.

“Alright, lead the way,” he gave in.

The Wind Hashira’s home was small, only containing two bedrooms, a kitchen, and a sitting room. The structure was settled inside a large bamboo forest, with a thin stone path that led the way to the front door. Inside, Giyu wasn’t surprised to see a few clothing articles flung on the wood floors, or a few dishes left out on the table. It was almost comforting to walk into a more domestic setting after a difficult battle. Sanemi sat him down on a pale green zabuton before going to get what Giyu assumed would be medical supplies.

In the meantime, the Water Hashira wasted no time removing the top half of his uniform, and his haori to assess the damage. He carefully unwrapped the bandage, making sure it wouldn’t make a mess on his comrade’s floor, before he fully removed it and tried to inspect the gashes through the mess of blood. Unbeknownst to him, Sanemi had returned with a bowl of water and a small bundle of rags, only to stumble upon an unexpected sight. The white-haired man nearly dropped the bowl, but instead caught himself and tried to force the heat from his face to disappear.

“Tomioka!” he exclaimed. “The hell are you doing?”

Giyu looked over at him with a raised eyebrow. “Inspecting the damage, of course,” he replied.

“And leaving a fucking mess on my floor?” Sanemi asked, walking over and setting the items down.

“I made sure it wouldn’t,” the Water Hashira replied simply.

The heather-eyed man grumbled a few unkind words under his breath as he dipped the first rag in the water and began cleaning the other man’s chest. Giyu was surprised at how gentle Sanemi’s hand glided over his skin. He expected the Wind Hashira’s touch to be rough, maybe even tense. It was a pleasant surprise. He watched his comrade intently as Sanemi finished cleaning the wound and began wrapping it better. Tomioka’s eyes fell and stayed on Shinazugawa’s hands, watching how they gripped and twisted with the bandage. He studied the few scars that littered the top of Sanemi’s hands, and noted that the palms were shockingly much more soft despite his everyday use of a katana. 

"You’re good at this,” he finally commented to break the silence between them.

Sanemi let out a huffy chuckle. “Have you seen me? I have to be,” he pointed out.

The Water hashira nodded in agreement and understanding as his fellow warrior finished up and began to clean up. The heather-eyed man proceeded to stand and make his way back towards the kitchen. 

“Stay here,” he ordered. “I’ll make us something to eat.”

Tomioka nodded and obeyed…for about ten minutes until he grew bored. He carefully stood up before making his way towards the kitchen. He stood in the doorway as he watched Sanemi work. Everything was going well until the other hashira attempted to slice an onion, not chop it. Long story short, he kept ending up with cubes instead of slivers. Giyu tried to suppress a laugh and instead crept up behind his struggling comrade. Gently, he pressed his body against Sanemi’s, placing his hands over the heather-eyed man’s.

“I thought you were a master with a blade,” he joked.

“A katana blade, dumbass. This is a kitchen knife,” Shinazugawa rolled his eyes, trying to hide the heat in his cheeks.

“Obviously,” the Water Hashira chuckled. “You’re not cutting it the right way.”

“I know how to slice a damn onion, Tomioka,” the Wind Hashira huffed.

Tomioka smirked behind Sanemi’s back. “Doesn’t appear that way.”

Before Sanemi could spat out a comeback, Giyu began to move the knife, maneuvering the Wind Hashira’s hands as well. The heather-eyed man tried not to notice how soft Tomioka’s hands were, nor the warmth from them. It was mean, but the pearl-haired man always expected Giyu’s hands to be as cold as he appeared to be. As the two men continued to slice the onion, and even chop up a few more vegetables, Sanemi couldn’t deny the ease he felt against the other’s chest. It felt like they were an ordinary couple preparing a meal together. Nothing to worry about as long as Tomioka was beside them. 

Unbeknownst to the Wind Hashira, Giyu was enjoying the closeness just as much. Gently holding Sanemi’s hands provided him with more warmth than a thousand fires. His hands were rough and calloused, but despite the scars, the top of his hands were quite soft. However, he noticed they were extremely cold, and he briefly wondered if his comrade’s skin had always been this frigid. Together, the two men finished chopping all the vegetables, and for a moment basked in the delicate and comforting silence. Finally, the Wind Hashira turned around, causing the Water Hashira to take a step back.

“Thanks, Tomioka,” Sanemi coughed, trying to hide the slight flush on his cheeks and keep on his rough demonor. 

Giyu merely nodded and turned to continue waiting in the sitting area. Both men were blushing profusely when they were out of each other’s line of sight. Neither could believe they had gotten so close to each other, and both berated themselves for letting it happen. Even so, both hashiras longed for the warmth and comfort that the other’s touch brought. It was addicting, and both adults were slowly succumbing to their desires. Giyu sat down and buried his face in his hands as Sanemi ran a distressed hand through his hair.

“What am I going to do?” both warriors helplessly asked themselves and the universe. 

Chapter Text

The evening continued on uneventfully. After dinner, they quickly divided the clean up before heading to bed. Unfortunately, but unsurprisingly, sleep rarely came easy for the two warriors nowadays. This was due to their shared history of demons sneaking into their childhood homes, and the similar trauma of watching loved ones being slaughtered by said demons. Only a heartless man could hold a memory like that and sleep peacefully throughout the night. Even so, this sleeplessness gave an opportunity for both young men to assess their situation.

In his room, Sanemi lay on his side, one arm tucked under his pillow and head. His eyes were staring, unfocused, at his bedroom wall as he attempted to collect his thoughts. He was slowly realizing his feelings might not be as easy to forget, and it was terrifying. According to society, someone like him should not exist. In fact, they should be wiped out and their ideals should be marked out of history. Due to his constant traveling, he had heard his fair share of stories regarding crimes against homosexuals. Strangely, as he laid there, he couldn’t find a real issue with loving another man. Groaning and rolling over onto his stomach, the Wind Hashira closed his eyes and attempted to sleep once more, hoping his thoughts would be magically sorted out in the morning.

In the guest room, Giyu was staring up at the ceiling, tracing out patterns and shapes in the dots of age in the bamboo. With one hand behind his head, and the other resting on his stomach, he thought over his predicament in a realistic way. Obviously, he knew he was attracted to Sanemi, and didn’t need to think further on that fact. However, his love was considered taboo, and that wasn’t even the biggest reason he could absolutely never chase after the other man. The main factor in his equation was Genya Shinazugawa, Sanemi’s younger brother. Though he had already decided he could never be selfish enough to steal the older Shinazugawa away from the young teen, a part of him fought against his morals. His mind and heart had never been at war with each other to this extent.

Deeper into the night, after both men had finally fallen asleep, Sanemi began to stir. Though the world around him was quiet, his mind was loud and his dreams were haunting. He was standing in a dark forest that stunk of rotten flesh. The trees and their branches blocked what little light the moon provided, shrouding him in an unnatural and eerie darkness. Suddenly, slicing through the silence, was a scream full of pain. Sanemi could recognize who it was and took off towards the scream without hesitation. As he continued to run further and further into the forest, the trees seemed to never end, and everything blurred together as his lungs began to heave and burn. That’s when he finally broke through into a clearing.

Standing before him was a demon. Its body was shrouded in shadows, wisping around it as if they were alive and hungry. Tightly held in its grip was Giyu, blood already dribbling from his mouth from his ribs being crushed. Before Sanemi could react at all, the demon plunged Giyu’s own katana through the hashira’s chest, then disappeared like it had never existed to begin with. The Wind Hashira’s eyes widened in horror as the man he loved hit the ground, and a pool of blood began to grow around him. 

Finding he could suddenly move again, he raced forward, quickly scooping Giyu’s limp body in his arms. Sanemi’s mind was spinning, but there was one prominent question that stood out among the chaos. “Why didn’t I move sooner?” He pulled Giyu into his arms as carefully as he could, but he knew he was too late. There was so much- too much blood. Even so, he couldn’t help but slide his haori off and attempt to slow the bleeding. A hand on his cheek forced his eyes to look into those beautiful pools of blue. 

“I love you,” Giyu muttered weakly before his hand slid off Sanemi’s cheek.  

Then he woke up. The Wind Hashira jerked up, grasping the air around his arms before coming to his senses. Drawing in a deep breath, he ran a shaky hand through his sweat-damp hair. Giving into impulse, he stumbled to his feet and crossed the hall to the guest room. Pushing the door open quietly, he sighed with relief upon finding Giyu laying there, chest rising and falling steadily. 

He had to pull himself away from the door so he wouldn’t enter and seem like some sort of creep. Trudging back to his own room, he groaned softly, rubbing both hands viciously up and down his face. He felt like shit, and he knew he wouldn’t be able to sleep again after a dream like that. Another factor in his growing headache was the confirmation that he was indeed attracted to Giyu Tomioka. Laying down, he buried his face in his pillow, curling around it in a vulnerable position. 

“That’s never gonna happen, Giyu. Not on my watch,” he mumbled, squeezing his eyes shut to try and force sleep upon himself.

After a restless night, Sanemi finally accepted he wasn’t going to get more than 3 hours of sleep, and clambered to his feet to start breakfast. The sun wasn’t even rising yet, but it was close enough for the Wind Hashira to justify his decision if his guest awoke and questioned him. He made himself a pot of hot tea and simple tamagoyaki before he heard a creak behind him. Sanemi had hoped he would have a little more time by himself to get his act together before facing the other hashira. Behind him, Giyu had emerged and was running a hand through his normally tied-up hair that was currently down and in his face.

“Feeling alright?” Sanemi asked, his voice coming out a little gruffer then he intended.

Giyu seemed to notice, but he didn’t comment on it and instead answered the question. “Just a little sore.”

The Wind Hashira tried to push down the concern he felt, but after his dream, it was much more difficult. Sighing deeply, he put his plate down and walked over, gently dragging the other warrior into the sitting room similarly to the previous evening. 

“Sit,” he ordered before going to fetch fresh bandages and some ointments that might help with the bruising. 

It wasn’t until he was in his restroom that he realized Giyu had walked out shirtless. His ears immediately turned red, and he felt his face grow hot as he leaned his forehead against the wall. Why did he have to be attracted to an absolute, socially unaware, idiot? He tried to cool his face down before grabbing the items he originally came for, then he quickly made his way back to his fellow hashira. Upon entering the living room, he found it empty.

Spinning around in search of the Water Hashira, he spied the messy black hair in the kitchen. “I told you to sit your ass down,” he said a little harshly as he leaned against the doorway.

Giyu, who was just finishing cutting up some fruit, turned without an ounce of remorse in his eyes. “You needed more for breakfast,” he stated simply.

Sanemi rolled his eyes, but with very little hostility compared to past eye rolls. “I was gonna make more breakfast once you woke up. Let me help you with your bandages first before you start moving around, idiot.” 

Giyu seemed to accept this answer and followed the other hashira back into the sitting room. Once settled again, Sanemi quickly removed the old, slightly bloody, bandages and began wrapping the new ones around Tomioka’s chest. They remained quiet, but it was comfortable and peaceful instead of awkward.

“You need to take better care of yourself if you’re a hashira, dumbass,” Sanemi grumbled as he finished.

“I could say the same thing about you,” Giyu replied simply.

The Wind Hashira suppressed a growl of annoyance. “Fucker-,” he broke off with a sigh and ran a hand down his face. “Look, you’re most useful to the demon slayers. People might not like shit about you, but you’re a lot less reckless than me. You’ve brought in more kills.”

Giyu raised an eyebrow. “Is that how you value your worth? With how many demons you’ve killed?”

Don’t answer. “Yeah, why?” Sanemi muttered anyway.

Tomioka then furrowed his eyebrows as he took the other man’s hand in his, looking down at the scars. “In my opinion, if someone does this kind of damage to themselves for the lives of others, they're worth more than a thousand slayers.”

He didn’t know what to do. Sanemi felt trapped, but not in a bad way. Giyu wasn’t holding his hand tightly, he could easily pull it away. He didn’t want to though. Even so, as he felt his ears begin to turn red, and the heat moved to his cheeks, he stood and turned away.

“I’ll finish breakfast,” he excused himself, grabbing the bandages and ointments to put away as well.

Giyu watched until he turned the corner before looking down at the hand that had held Sanemi’s. He still couldn’t believe how soft they were, and how they were surprisingly smaller than his own. Then he groaned softly and leaned back against the wall. He didn’t want to ruin anything between them, but he was falling harder and harder by the day. He sat up straighter when he heard the other man reenter with breakfast, hoping Sanemi  hadn’t caught him looking so worried and conflicted.

They ate breakfast in silence before heading to clean the dishes and pans. Sanemi washed and Giyu dried, but neither were entirely focused on their assigned task. Sanemi was muttering curses under his breath. Curses at the world, curses at Giyu for being so gentle with him, and curses at himself for liking it. Meanwhile, Tomioka was dealing with the internal conflict of desparently and wholeheartedly wanting to run away with Sanemi, but knowing it would be better for both of them if he left him alone. Suddenly, the dishes stopped coming, and that’s when both men realized they had run out of things to clean. Feeling a little sheepishly, they parted ways, Giyu heading to clean the guest room and Sanemi heading towards the living room. After the rest of the house cleaning was through, Giyu decided to take his leave.

Sanemi offered a short wave to his departing guest, his back against his front door frame. “Stay safe out there, Waterboy,” he said with a smirk. “I don’t wanna save your ass again.”

Giyu rolled his eyes, but an amused smile ended his act of annoyance instantly. “I wouldn’t mind spending the night again,” he shot back. “Maybe I could teach you to slice an onion properly.”

“Go to hell,” Sanemi rolled his eyes, his smirk remaining though. 

As Giyu turned with a chuckle, the Wind Hashira’s smirk faded. As he watched his guest slowly disappear through the bamboo, his mind wandered back to his nightmare. 

“Please be safe, Giyu,” he whispered. “For me.”    

Chapter Text

About a week had passed since their time together at Sanemi’s house, and the Wind Hashira was at his wits end. Every single night he was haunted by that same nightmare, but that wasn’t even the worst part. With each dream, he would get there slower and slower. It was as if these dreams were taunting him, holding him back to feed off his desperation and fear. It made him dread sleeping, and avoid it if he could. However, a human physically couldn’t go without some amount of sleep for a long time, so tonight Sanemi was forced to brave his nightmares. 

As soon as he fell asleep, his dream began. To his surprise and concern, he wasn’t in a forest this time. Instead he was in a long hallway that appeared to go on forever. As he went to take a step, suddenly the floor opened up under him, sucking him into a black hole. This portal dropped him into another, shorter hallway that turned a corner. Already, this dream was much more annoying than horrifying. He soon took back his words as a familiar yet foreign scream echoed throughout whatever building he was in. In an instant, Sanemi was running.

Unfortunately, the black hole opened again, and he was going too fast to stop before it. He fell once again into another hallway, but he wasted no time and instead broke through one of the shoji dividers next to him. The scream rang out again, but it was closer this time. Sanemi’s heart was racing, and his anxiety was spiking higher and higher as he broke through more and more shoji doors. He was suddenly falling again, and was placed in a large room. It was in shambles, with multiple pillars broken and walls destroyed. However, all of this became insignificant in his mind as soon as his eyes landed on a body in front of him.

He recognized it immediately. Scrambling to his feet, he ran and slid onto his knees beside him. His breathing grew shaky as he scooped the body into his arms and gently held onto his cheek. Tears were already growing in his eyes as he felt the sticky blood begin covering his arms.

“Genya,” he said, his voice weak. “Open your eyes for me…please.”

His little brother didn’t respond. Genya’s body had been sliced and beaten, and was limp in Sanemi’s arms. As sob ripped from the older brother’s throat as he gently shook his brother’s cold body.

“Come on, this isn’t a fucking joke,” he whimpered. “Genya-”

Another sob cut off what he was going to say as he buried his face in his little brother’s neck. His shoulders began to shake violently as he clung to Genya’s body. He prayed and pleaded for his brother’s life, but received no answer. In a fit of self-hatred and sorrow, he screamed bitterly at the gods, cursing them for taking his little brother. Then he woke up.

Tears were still streaming down his cheeks as his eyes snapped open and his body shot upright. His breathing was irregular, and he could still feel the blood on his arms. Feeling extremely vulnerable, Sanemi slowly wrapped his arms around himself as he wept in relief that it had been a dream. His relationship with Genya had been nonexistent for a while now, and it was mainly his fault. He was trying to run his little brother out of the demon slayers, hoping Genya could live a normal, peaceful life. His treatment towards his brother was terrible, he would be the first to admit it, but he still loved him. The very idea that Genya could die a death like that haunted Sanemi more than any of his precious nightmares. 

The next morning, he decided he would never sleep again. He headed to the Butterfly Mansion as soon as the sun began to rise to ask if they had anything to push fatigue back. As he walked, he tried to understand why he had suddenly begun having such terrible dreams. In the past, he hardly ever dreamed, much less had vivid nightmares like these. The possibility that these might be visions flickered in his mind, but he quickly dismissed it. However, it was mainly in fear he was right.

Upon arrival, he first noticed Giyu. Then he saw Genya. Puzzled, he wondered when those two had even interacted before today. The sight of his little brother alive and well brought some relief to his restless mind though. Even so, he knew it was better if he didn’t approach his brother. It wasn’t like Genya knew of his dream, and he couldn’t just give up on his act now. He had to get his brother out of this kind of life, now more than ever. 

However, fate seemed to have another plan. As he began to enter the mansion, he was suddenly yanked back outside. A scowl settled on his face since he hated being pulled around, and he spun to berate whoever touched him. Of course it had to be Giyu. His harsh words got stuck in his throat, so he simply had to pull his arm free instead. 

“I’m busy, Waterboy,” he said gruffly as he turned around again.

However, he was once again pulled back, and began getting dragged somewhere. Sanemi tried to get free once more, but found Giyu’s grip to be surprisingly tight. What brought this on all of the sudden? Saneemi has a feeling it had to do with Genya and Tomioka’s interaction.

“I have shit to do today, idiot!” he snapped. “Let go!”

The Water Hashira continued to give him the silent treatment, which didn’t help with Sanemi’s attitude. He had already gotten the minimum amount of sleep because of his fucked up nightmare, and now he was getting dragged around like a ragdoll. With words and excuses out of the question, Sanemi turned to violence. He began trying to peel Giyu’s fingers off his wrist, and then just slapped his hand. 

“Tomioka, what the fuck!-” he exclaimed with anger before he realized they had stopped. 

Before them, next to a koi pond, Genya stood wringing his hands. Finally, Giyu loosened his iron grip, and allowed Sanemi to have his wrist back. The Wind Hashira growled as he yanked it away from Giyu and began to rub the red ring now around his wrist.

“What is this?” he asked sourly.

"Reconciliation,” Tomioka said simply.

Sanemi merely rolled his eyes and turned to walk away. Giyu gritted his teeth and pulled the other man back by his haori. The heather-eyed man immediately spun and smacked the hand off.

“Leave me alone, Tomioka,” he growled slowly. “Whatever is going on between me and my brother doesn’t concern you.”

When he went to take his leave again, Genya stopped him this time. “I’m sorry for calling you a monster, aniki!” he blurted out.

Admittedly, Sanemi didn’t expect this at all and froze in his steps. For starters, Genya was never blunt like this, at least around him. He was a bit stuttery now, and tended to fumble his words. Secondly, he didn’t expect his brother to remember his heartbreaking words, much less apologize for them. His silence must have given Genya the indication to continue.

“I’m sorry for being a burden on you,” he continued. “But I swear I’m here to learn how to protect myself and others so you don’t have to. I never wanted so much to fall upon your shoulders, aniki.”

Sanemi’s entire body stiffened at the word “burden.” He had never seen Genya as a burden. He had only been trying to keep him safe, trying to keep him oblivious to how dark their world was becoming. He wanted his little brother to live a long, happy life with a family. A family that lasted longer than theirs had. Instead, his neglectance caused his brother to believe he was weighing Sanemi down, and had to somehow prove himself. In the end, Genya still walked straight into the darkest part of their world, and couldn’t even use a breathing style to protect himself. Sanemi’s choices had produced the exact opposite outcome he had hoped for. 

During this period of silence and remorse, Genya sighed and his eyes fell to the koi pond. “I’m so sorry, ‘Nemi,” he whispered earnesty before turning to take his leave. 

He didn’t get far before a hand pulled on his arm, and dragged him straight into a tight hug. Despite the small height difference now, Sanemi could still hold the back of Genya’s head and tightly wrap his other arm around his brother. Exactly like when they were kids and hugs were a much more common occurrence. 

“Don’t apologize, ya dumbass,” he said firmly. “I’m the one who is sorry. I left you all alone and without any explanation. I had hoped with me out of the picture you would forget about me and that entire hellish night with mom. I wanted you to find a girl, settle down, and maybe even start a family. I never wanted you on the side of the world I lived in. I went about it in every wrong way, and I’ve accepted that. Please, forgive me. This is all my fault.” 

Genya’s eyes widened, but his arms slowly rose to wrap around his brother. All this time, he had thought Sanemi hated his existence because of his accusations that day. He assumed that hatred only grew when he revealed the fact he ate demons to gain power during fights. 

“I forgive you, ‘Nemi,” he said softly. 

Sanemi allowed a small smile of relief to grow on his face before he noticed Giyu sneaking out of the front gates. He excused himself, promising Genya he would come back so they could talk more, before jogging after the Water Hashira. It didn’t take long for him to catch up and stop Giyu by grabbing his hand. There wasn’t any resistance, so Sanemi allowed himself a little vulnerability. 

“Thank you, Tomioka,” he said with the sincerest voice he could muster. 

“It was my pleasure, Shinazugwa,” Giyu replied with a nod and smile.

Sanemi was honestly at a loss for words. Was this Giyu paying back the favor of him taking care of him that night? He couldn’t understand why the normally unbothered guy was becoming so gentle towards him.

“I used to have a sister,” Tomioka suddenly confessed. “That’s why I helped you and Genya. Don’t take the moments you have together for granted, Shinazugawa. You have no idea when and if they will end.”

With those words of advice and another kind smile, Giyu turned and began walking away. With this new information, Sanemi realized how truly little he knew about the Water Hashira, and how deeply he wanted to change that. He laughed softly to himself as he put his hands on his hips and watched the other man disappear.

“You really are a big mystery,” he mumbled before turning to head back to Genya. “But I won’t waste anymore time with my brother,” he swore to Giyu, even though the other hashira was well out of hearing range. 

Upon entering the headquarters courtyard again, he smiled in amusement at the sight of his colossal brother with his knees to his chest and his fingers playing with the koi fish. He walked over and ruffled Genya’s hair before taking the first step of never wasting a moment. 

“How would you feel about moving in with your brother?” he asked with a confident smile, already knowing the answer.

Chapter Text

Genya had been living with Sanemi for a month now and the Wind Hashira’s nightmares regarding his brother had stopped for the most part. However, his dreams of Giyu’s death were getting worse and worse. The most frightening aspect wasn’t even the ending anymore. Nowadays, instead of a neverending buzzing, he had started hearing noises like a bubbling brook and crickets chirping. Additionally, he recently began smelling things too. He could smell the pine needles, and rain in the air. The most terrifying detail about his dreams were they were getting more and more realistic. 

Jolting up from his futon, Sanemi groaned in misery and shoved the palms of his hands into his eyes. He didn’t know how much more of this he could mentally bear. This time, he had begun sinking into the earth as he watched Giyu reach out for him. This was another new detail. Did it imply he was going to freeze up? He shook his head, still in denial that these were going to be anything more than a bunch of nightmares.

Finally, he decided to just get up and make some breakfast for him and his brother instead. When Genya finally woke up, the sun had risen and Sanemi was already dressed in his uniform. 

“Morning,” Genya greeted with a yawn. “You’re already heading out?”

Sanemi ruffled his brother’s hair and nodded. “Crow came already. I have to head out now if I want to make it to the town by nightfall,” he explained.

“Be careful,” his little brother smiled, “and good luck.”

“You too,” Sanemi said before heading out.

It was around midday when his crow appeared once more with some unfortunate news. “Sanemi Shinazugawa,” it cawed. “You will be joined by the Water Hashira, Giyu Tomioka, when you arrive at the village.”

The Wind Hashira groaned. Ever since the nightmares began, the last thing he wanted to do was go on a mission with Giyu. Not to mention he was trying, but failing, to ignore his growing feelings for the man. He wondered why he even needed help to begin with. He highly doubted the demon was an Upper Moon, and knew he could handle this alone. Even so, if it was the Master’s wishes, he couldn’t do much about it. Instead, he forced himself to accept it and try to decide on what persona he was going to put on tonight. 

Upon arrival, it wasn’t difficult to pick Giyu out of the crowd due to his slightly ridiculous haori. To put it bluntly, the other hashira stuck out like a sore thumb regardless of the haori. There was just something about him that was different from a normal person. Something that sent a shiver down Sanemi’s spine every time he looked at Giyu.

“Pick anything up yet?” Sanemi asked as he finally made it across the crowded streets to the other man.

Giyu shook his head with an almost disappointed sigh. “Nothing.”

The heather-eyed man huffed with impatience but began to look around the market area. It was oddly crowded considering the sun was now almost set. Then again, the streets were beautifully lit, so he supposed there wasn’t any reason not to come at night. Work during the day, and enjoy the evening. However, there wasn’t anything there for them, so Sanemi tugged on Giyu’s arm to motion for the other man to follow his lead.

Making their way out of the market space, the two hashiras began to look down dark alleyways and in unlit spaces. They searched for about 30 minutes longer before the sound of fleshing being torn reached Sanemi’s ears. He was off like an arrow, with Giyu right on his heels. The noise led them to a dark and eerie part of the town, right on the edge and closest to the forest surrounding the homes and buildings. In an alley with nowhere to run, Sanemi found the monster. It was crouched over a corpse of a young girl. Even mauled and bloodied, the Wind Hashira could tell the girl had been innocent to this world with her fair skin and shiny hair. 

The creature heard them and immediately spun around with a snarl on its lips. It glared at the two warriors before leaping into the air and making an escape into the treeline. Immediately, Giyu raced after it. Sanemi glanced back at the victim one last time with sadness before joining in the chase. The two hashira followed the demon until they were deep into the forest, and the moon was the only light they had. Stopping to try to get their bearings, Sanemi finally looked at where they were standing, and his blood went cold. 

They were standing in the clearing where all his nightmares began. His heart began to pound as loud as a gong and his mind started racing. He tried to convince himself he was being paranoid, that there was something different and he just had to find it. However, as his eyes darted over the terrain, he found nothing out of place. Suddenly, Tomioka disappeared from beside him.

“Shinazugawa, hurry!” the Water Hashira called back to him.

The other hashira’s words were drowned out by the bubbling of a brook nearby, and the chirping of crickets grew louder and louder against his eardrums. He felt dizzy and the world began to get blurry as his eyes continued to move from every tree, rock, and bush. There had to be something different. Just then, he finally realized he was just standing there, and Giyu had disappeared. Jumping into action, the Wind Hashria sprinted into the forest, heading down the hauntingly familiar path. As he ran, he came to the horrifying conclusion that his dreams were visions/ Additionally, but perhaps even more terrifying, he remembered in every dream that he was too late.

Clinging to reality just enough to know where he was going, he pushed through into the clearing he had seen dozens of times before, and he found Giyu in combat. Not stopping for a second, he collided directly into the demon’s side, sending the beast flying into a tree trunk. Quickly, using the new spark ignited within him, he drew his katana and charged forward. Sanemi brought the blade down, planning to quickly slice the monster’s head off, but the creature disagreed. Dodging swiftly, the creature was racing back towards Giyu with drool leaking from its lips. 

Sanemi knew he shouldn’t underestimate the creature. In his nightmares, the beast was powerful enough to give both of them a struggle. However, he was thankful for once that it wasn’t an upper or lower moon demon. He was determined to change fate. He would win this fight, even if it cost him his own life, and slaughter this monster. Sanemi refused to let Giyu die. That was his promise to himself as he raced after the creature.

The beast was fast though, faster than the average demon, and it unfortunately made it to the Water Hashira first. Giyu leapt out of the way of the attack, but as he landed, he felt something wrap around his ankle. He has a split second to realize it was the demon’s hand before he was yanked backwards and was caught in the coils of the monster’s elongated arms. He couldn’t move his arms, and the demon snatched his katana off him immediately after capturing him. 

“How delicious,” the creature hummed. “A young, healthy, lovely male.”

A yell was heard before Giyu’s body fell from the creature’s clutches. Sanemi has used the small moment of distraction to his advantage and closed through the disgusting arm that held Tomioka. He went for a second attack, but the demon caught the blade between its hands, and ripped it from Sanemi’s hold. It let out a crazed crackle before skittering towards Giyu once more, Sanemi’s blade still wedged in the center of its palm. Sanemi has no idea why the monster wasn’t trying to attack him and only going after Giyu. What did Waterboy possess that he didn’t? 

“Beauty, beauty, beauty that once belonged to me,” the demon giggled as it sang. “Beauty, beauty, beauty that will be mine again.”

Then everything fell together. All the reports were about victims who were quite young. The gender varied, but based on each description, they were all beautiful young people. Though both men had their marks and bumps, compared to Sanemi’s extremely scarred and worn body, Giyu was blemishless. Too bad for the demon, because if anyone was going to have Tomioka’s beauty for themselves, it was going to be Sanemi. 

Dashing towards Giyu, it was then that he noticed the other hashira was merely dodging the attacks. He hadn’t noticed that the creature had stolen both of their blades until now. Groaning to himself, he slid under the demon’s body and smirked as it looked down. 

“Surprise, ugly,” he said as he ripped his blade from the demon’s hand and forced it through one of its eyes and straight out the back of its head. 

The demon screeched like a banshee as he stumbled back. It didn’t even attempt to remove the katana before it attacked again though. Using one of its annoying arms, Sanemi felt the air being knocked out of him as he was thrown outside the clearing and into a tree. 

“I’m done with this!” it exclaimed furiously. 

The Wind Hashira stumbled back into the clearing, coughing up blood. He had broken a rib, maybe two. His pain was quickly masked with fear when he saw Giyu pinned to the ground with his own katana about to be plunged through him. Sanemi’s blade was still thrusted through the monster’s skull, leaving both hashira defenseless. He had failed. Giyu was going to die just like in his dreams, and it was all his fault. 

Suddenly, Sanemi remembered he wasn’t dreaming. He was in reality, and he could still move. Breaking into a sprint, and ignoring the pain in his side, he raced towards the beast. He had made a vow to himself, and he wasn’t going to break it. This time would be different. He wouldn’t be too late.

Desperation took over as the world began to move in slow motion. In one last attempt, Sanemi leapt forward, and his labor paid off. Instead of piercing Giyu, the heather-eyed man felt an overwhelming pain erupt from his stomach. The blade continued to be pushed through him till it was protruding out of his back. Gasping for air, he still managed a cocky smirk. 

“Made it,” he taunted.

After that, everything became a blur. He heard a hysterical scream before the sound of a blade being ripped through flesh. He briefly wondered who was screaming. Surely not Giyu Tomioka, the one who always kept his emotions in check on missions. Just then, Giyu’s blurry face entered his view, and he felt his body being lifted off the cold ground. He noticed Tomioka’s mouth moving, but the words fell on deaf ears as all sound went quiet to Sanemi’s ears. The Wind Hashira forced what he hoped was a smile on his face as he shakily brought his hand up to Giyu’s cheek. 

“Y…you’re okay,” he half-mumbled with relief. 

Something wet began to cover Giyu’s cheek. They couldn’t be tears though. No one would care that much if he died. Then Genya flashed through his mind, and Sanemi was hit with a sense of regret. However, he had made his choice, and a part of him still believed Genya would be better off without him. In the end, this was the best choice for everyone, because he wasn’t too late. 

He felt his body beginning to shut down as his vision started going black. His hand began to fall from Giyu’s cheek, but the other man must have put his own on it to keep it there. As his eyes closed completely, he faintly heard something, but it sounded far away, and had to have been his mind playing one last cruel joke on him. 

“Dammit, Sanemi, don’t leave me!” Giyu’s shouted. 

He felt his body being joustled, which sent another wave of unbearable pain throughout his entire body. Then as he finally drifted into nothingness, he heard perhaps the cruelest joke of all.

“I love you,” Giyu whispered, voice cracking as a sob ripped through his throat.

Chapter Text

It all happened too quickly. At one moment, the demon was charging straight at him, then Sanemi was suddenly on the ground with his katana piercing his body. He felt an uncontrollable rage enter his mind and body, and all he saw was red. Giyu ripped Sanemi’s blade from the monster’s face and began blindly fighting the creature. He heard someone screaming hysterically, and it wasn’t until he sliced the monster’s head clean off that he realized it had been him. 

Without bothering to watch the demon disappear, Giyu rushed back to his fallen comrade’s side. As gently as he could with shaking hands, he lifted Sanemi into his arms, being as careful as possible not to move the blade. He felt useless now despite his title as a hashira. He couldn’t even remove the blade in fear Sanemi would bleed out quicker. His grip tightened subconsciously as he began praying for someone to find them, or for a god to come to them. He begged for a miracle because he didn’t want to risk even moving the man in his arms. 

Suddenly, a soft touch on his cheek drew him back to reality as he looked back down at Sanemi. The Wind Hashira had a small smile on his face despite how close to death Giyu knew he was. The sight alone sprung tears into his eyes. Sanemi’s thumb gently traced circles on his cheek, wiping a few tears away as well. 

“Y…you’re okay,” Sanemi whispered weakly as his hand began to fall from Giyu’s cheek.

“Dammit, Sanemi, don’t leave me!” Giyu shouted, throwing all caution to the wind as he lifted his comrade’s limp body and began racing out of the forest.

Every moment he missed flashed through his mind. Every smile or laugh that had been unnoticed, every training session, and every domestic moment like their time in Sanemi’s kitchen all flooded his brain. He never should have tried to ignore his feelings. They could have had so much by now, but now Giyu was carrying Sanemi’s lifeless body through a maze of trees. He had been a coward, and now fate was being cruel to him.

I love you,” Giyu whispered, hoping the man he loved could hear him still.

After what felt like an eternity, Tomioka burst through the treeline and dashed through the village. He ignored the shouts and questions the crowds gave him and continued forward till he was out of the small town. Above him, both their crows were soaring, almost as if leading him to aid. Giyu sent a silent appreciation to their feathered friends, because he knew he would not have been able to find his way easily with how much his head was swimming. He couldn’t cry, and refused to. Only if Sanemi was confirmed dead, but Tomioka knew he wouldn’t be. However, he still prayed his comrade’s stubbornness and strength would hold on. 

By some miracle, the Water Hashira eventually saw Headquarters coming into view. Somehow speeding his pace even further, Giyu made it to the door and threw it open. The sudden entrance startled the kakushi around the area, but he paid little mind to them and barreled straight to the Butterfly Mansion. He vaguely heard Gyomei call out to him, but he was too focused on his mission to care. Even when he heard Genya’s scream of absolute horror, the warrior did not wait. The only person here who was needed right now was Shinobu, and if she couldn’t help him, he would someone who could.

Finally at the mansion, he used his entire body to force the door open. Aoi immediately arrived to investigate the racket, but stopped her scolding when she realized the situation. Still, Giyu couldn’t trust the girl with Sanemi and moved past her and further into the mansion. 

“Shinobu!” he shouted as loudly as his dry throat would allow. “Kocho, I need you!”

The Insect Hashira and medical genius finally appeared, and the scowl on her face was replaced by shock when she too saw the situation. Without hesitation, she threw open the door to the surgery room and had Aoi bring her medical instruments. When his arms finally let go of Sanemi’s body, he almost threw up from exhaustion and from how pale the other man had become. He could pass as a corpse. 

“Is he?-” Giyu began breathlessly.

“Somehow still alive,” Shinobu cut in as she began cutting the bloodied uniform off Sanemi’s body. “You need to rest and give me space to work though. Girls, please find him a room and treat any of his wounds.”

Sumi, Kiyo, and Naho began leading him out right as Shinobu removed Giyu’s blade from Sanemi’s chest. His vision began to blur as his body began swaying. All the adrenaline that had previously been keeping him going had disappeared. He tried his best to keep moving so the girls wouldn’t panic, but there was only so much he could do at that point. The last thing he remembered was the girls screaming in fright as his body slumped against the wall. 

The next day, Giyu awoke in a dimly-lit room. It appeared to be the middle of the day, but his curtains had been closed so the room wasn’t as bright. Attempting to sit up, he felt a striking soreness throughout his entire body, but especially from his abdomen. He let out a sharp gasp at the pain, chalking it up that the demon probably got in more hits then he remembered, and when he was nearly crushed by the creature’s gangly arms. He was brought from his thoughts when the door slid open, and Genya walked in balancing a tray of food in one hand so he could close the door behind him. When the teen noticed him awake, he appeared shocked. Tomioka assumed this wasn’t his first visit to his room then. 

“Are you feeling okay?” Genya asked, setting the tray on the bedside table.

Giyu couldn’t push down the guilt that flooded his stomach. “Yes, thank you.”

There was an odd moment of silence before the teen continued. “You…You didn’t attack my brother did you?”

Tomioka felt offense rise in him, but he quickly calmed down and saw things from Genya’s point of view. That previous morning, Sanemi had been fine and heading off on another mission. When he saw his brother again, he was severely injured, and Giyu’s blade was the cause of it. Even if Genya’s mind wasn’t muddled with stress and worry, it would still blame the Water Hashira, even if it was just subconscious.

“No, it was the demon. It had stolen both of our blades and was using them against us. The blow Sanemi took was meant for me,” he said, ending in a bitter tone. 

The teen sighed in relief. “I’m sorry. I know you would never hurt my brother, no matter how patronizing he can be towards you. The thought was just there when I saw your blade and…” Genya trailed off, looking ashamed now.

“I understand. Truly, I do,” Giyu reassured. “I’m sorry your brother ended up like this though. I would rather it have been me,” he admitted with a sigh. 

Genya was silent for a second. It made Giyu wonder briefly if he had heard him at all. As he went to apologize again, the young teen finally replied.

“I know he wouldn’t agree with you,” he chuckled softly. “Sanemi doesn’t make half-hearted decisions. If he chose to save you, it was for a reason.”

Giyu smiled softly. “I can’t imagine the reason.”

“I do,” Genya said. “Tomioka, he loves you. I know it’s not exactly my place to tell you, but I think you deserve to know after last night. Knowing my brother, he'll take this secret to his grave anyways.”

The Water Hashira felt his cheeks heat up. Even though he technically knew about Sanemi’s feelings, he couldn’t help but feel embarrassed. He realized how much the other man meant to him now, and he planned on acting on his feelings when Sanemi woke up, and he knew he would. He couldn’t die now, not when Giyu finally had the courage to express how he felt. He chuckled at Genya's comment, but felt his smile fade at the bitter thought that rose in his mind. What if Sanemi couldn’t pull through? Giyu would lose what might have been, and Genya would be alone. Additionally, the Demon Slayer Corps would lose a hashira, one of their beacons of hope, to a normal demon. 

As these worries flooded his mind, he suddenly realized something. “You don’t find it disgusting? Your brother being in love with a man?” he asked.

Genya tilted his head to the side in a curious manner. “Do you find it disgusting?”

“Of course not!” Giyu rushed out, seeing how his wording might have come off wrong. “I’ve loved him for as long as he’s loved me-”

“Good,” the teen smiled. “All I care about is that my brother finds someone who truly loves him.”

The hashira smiled softly. “I do,” he said softly. “However, how did you come to terms with the fact your brother is homosexual?”

“Well,” Genya’s face turned a soft red. “In truth, he wasn’t the only homosexual in the family. It was something we always bonded over.”

Giyu couldn’t help but smile at the shyness of the intimidating-looking teenager. “I see,” he nodded. “I assume no one knows but Sanemi and I?”   

Genya shook his head. “No one else knows, not even Gyomei. I have no idea how he’d react, and I can’t afford to lose him.”

“I understand. I would never tell my mentor either. He’s an extremely traditional man, and I can’t imagine breaking his heart with information like that,” Giyu explained. “Do you have someone you’re currently attracted to?” he couldn’t help but ask.

The teen’s face blushed brighter. “Yes…but the feelings aren’t mutual. He likes someone else, who happens to be a girl.”

Giyu put a hand on Genya’s shoulder. “You never know,” he advised. “I never imagined Sanemi would ever reciprocate my feelings, but here we are.”

Genya smiled. “Thank you, Tomioka.”

“You can call me Giyu,” Giyu smiled. “I don’t mind.”

The two continued taking in hushed tones for a while after. Genya had many questions about Sanemi over the years, and about Giyu’s discovery of his beautiful sin. Tomioka wanted to see Sanemi, but unfortunately Genya informed him that Shinobu wasn’t allowing anyone in his room at the moment. After about an hour, Genya took his leave, looking much less heavy then when he arrived. Giyu leaned over and took the cup of water off the tray the teen had brought. As he began sipping it, he confirmed his decision. He was going to confess to Sanemi. His only reason not to was originally Genya, but the teen was in the same boat as them. Giyu could no longer remain a coward, nor a saint. He wished to be a brave, selfish man. 

Sighing deeply, he slid out of bed and wandered over to the window. After he had opened the curtains and window, he breathed in the fresh air, and allowed a cool breeze to wash over him. All he could do at the moment was pray that the man he loved would pull through. God, he wanted to kill Sanemi for being so self-sacrificing, and kiss him for being so stubborn with his feelings. The airhead had to make it. 

“Wake up, Sanemi,” Giyu whispered. “You have so much waiting for you here.”

Chapter Text

It was over a week before Shinobu finally allowed visitors to see Sanemi. Genya was the first one in the room, and was there when anyone else visited. One might think Giyu would also be one of the first to visit, but surprisingly he wasn’t. The reason was simple. Giyu Tomioka had no idea how to confess his feelings. It was like he was a child all over again, blushing and stuttering over the speech he had come up with in his head. 

In the meantime, Genya still visited him and informed him on how his brother was doing. The teenager understood Giyu’s predicament and tried to help, but eventually it all came down to Tomioka’s execution of the confessions. After all, one doesn’t simply waltz up to someone and blurt out “I love you, will you be mine.” It’s only done that way in performances. Unfortunately, he was living in reality. This predicament kept him from visiting Sanemi for another three days.

Finally, after coming up with a decent speech and reciting it, Giyu was standing outside Sanemi’s door. Breathing in and out slowly, he slid open the door. Sanemi was sitting upright in bed bouncing a ball against the wall and back to him. His chest was wrapped tightly with bandages, and nothing else. Giyu had never realized how far back Sanemi’s array of scars went until now. Sanemi jerked back in surprise before wincing when he saw Giyu.

“Goddammit, Waterboy,” he groaned, holding where his wound was. “Announce yourself next time or something,” he snapped.

“Apologizes,” Giyu said, smiling faintly at how crude Sanemi already was again.

Sanemi seemed to realize how rude he sounded and ran a hand through his hair.  “It’s fine. Sorry, I shouldn’t have yelled at you,” he mumbled.

Giyu replied with a smile before sliding into the chair that had been placed by Sanemi’s bed. Unbeknownst to Tomioka, the other man was scanning over him for any kind of injury, any sign that he had failed at all. Relief washed over him when all he saw were a couple bruises and cuts.

“How are you feeling?” Giyu asked.

“Fine,” Sanemi shrugged. “I wish Butterfly Girl would let me walk around though. I’m dying being all cooped up,” he complained.

Giyu smirked. “Oh, so a katana through your chest won’t kill you, but sitting in a bed will,” he teased.

“Fuck off,” Sanemi chuckled, shoving Giyu’s shoulder lightly. “I still can’t believe you know how to joke around, Mr. Oh-So-Serious.”

“Exactly how many unflattering nicknames do you have for me?” Giyu questioned, crossing his arms with amusement.

“That’s classified information,” Sanemi replied sassily, mimicking Giyu’s action.

The two hashiras melted into laughter, both relieved the other was okay, and enjoying some lighthearted banter. Giyu sighed and leaned back in the chair, smiling to himself at the warm feeling in his chest. He couldn’t recall the last time he had messed around with someone, and laughed freely. He wondered if he should confess now while their spirits were high, but his gut told him it wasn' the right time. Giyu wondered if it would ever be considered the right time. 

“Thank you,” he said instead. “Thank you for saving my life.”

“Don’t mention it,” Sanemi waved off. “We’re hashiras. We’re the only ones who can watch each others’ backs. Everyone else depends on us to save them, even if we’re the ones who are in a pinch. Besides, now you owe me one,” he smirked.

Giyu rolled his eyes as he tried to hold back his smile. He lived in a world where his blushes and butterflies were a sin. Even some of their fellow hashiras had voiced their disagreement with homosexuals. If what Sanemi said was true, Giyu wondered if they would still have his back if they ever found out. Could he trust them with his life ever again? He knew at this point he would back out, so he had to confess now. 

“Truthfully, I came here about a more serious matter,” Giyu began.

This piqued Sanemi’s interest immediately. “What is it?” he asked. “It better now be a lecture about taking better care of myself. Believe me, Waterboy, Shinobu’s given me at least four by now.”

“No, no, nothing like that,” Giyu chuckled, but his words left him as he tried to continue into the actual confession.

“Tomioka?” Sanemi prodded gently, looking a little concerned now.

Words wouldn’t come to him. Giyu suddenly felt as though his entire speech still wasn’t enough to describe how deeply he felt for the other hashira. Speaking of which, Sanemi was still looking at him with growing concern. It most likely seemed like he had a head injury or something. 

“Fuck it,” Giyu sighed.

He stood up and leaned down, pressing his lips against Sanemi’s. The other man jolted at the sudden action, and for a split second, Giyu was worried that he and Genya had both been mistaken. However, Sanemi’s eyes finally closed, and he returned the kiss quite passionately. Giyu was now resting one knee on top of the mattress, pressing Sanemi up against the headboard with one of his hands coming up next to the side of Sanemi’s head. The other man’s arms snaked around his waist, pulling him closer than Giyu had originally dared in fear he would hurt him. Finally, they pulled back, a thin string of saliva being all that was left as proof of their sin. 

“Holy fuck,” Sanemi said breathlessly, arms wrapping around Giyu’s neck to pull him closer once more. 

They met in another kiss. “Did I get my point across?” Giyu asked between kisses that trailed down Sanemi’s neck.

“I think I need some more persuasion,” the Wind Hashira smirked.

Suddenly, footsteps were heard right outside the door. Giyu sprung back and into the chair once more as Sanemi attempted to fix his hair and rub his flushed cheeks away. Obanai poked his head a mere second later. 

“Tomioka, I require some assistance,” he said simply.

Giyu nodded. “I’ll be there in a minute. Wait for me outside,” he replied.

Obanai nodded before closing the door. Giyu and Sanemi both let out a sigh of relief. The Serpent Hashira was one of the most opinionated about the homosexual community, and not in a good way. 

“Guess I better go,” the black-haired man chuckled, standing to take his leave.

He was stopped by someone taking hold of his hand. “We need to talk about this,” Sanemi said. “We’re taking a big risk here, Giyu. I have Genya, and you have Hard Headed Boy. People like us are considered the worst of sins.”

Giyu smiled and kissed the top of Sanemi’s hand. “Then you’ll be the best sin I ever committed.”

Sanemi waited till Giyu had left before grabbing a pillow and burying his face in it. The room was extremely hot all of the sudden. Then again, it might have just been his face. He had finally gotten a taste of Giyu Tomioka, and he didn’t know how long he’d be able to go without another. He finally lifted his head from out of the pillow and ran a hand through his hair. He couldn’t help but smile at Giyu’s words.

“I’ll be your best sin, huh?” he said softly to himself. “God, Giyu you better be worth all the trouble you’re about to cause me,” he chuckled

Chapter Text

Finally, another week later, Sanemi was able to walk around freely without someone having to assist him, or as he called it, babysit him. A couple more days later, and he was allowed to train as long as it was more on the easier side. At last, a week later, he was able to train as usual with an opponent. He trained with his little brother for a few days, teaching him some tricks that didn’t require a breathing technique. However, he wanted to train with Giyu. Not for any…indecent reasons, but merely because their skill level had always been pretty even before. To assess where he lost strength, he needed to train with someone near where his level had originally been.

The Wind Hashira found the stoic man standing near a koi pond in HQ, staring down into the semi-deep pool of clear water. Sanemi looked around to reassure no one was around before he snaked his arms around Giyu's waist from behind.

“Hey,” he whispered in the other’s ear. “You seem more distant than usual. Are you okay? Girl problems?” He teased, attempting to lighten Giyu’s expression. 

Giyu let out a small chuckle of amusement as he rolled his eyes fondly and placed a hand on top of Sanemi’s. “I’m fine,” he nodded. “Did you need something?”

The Wind Hashira frowned, not believing his newly acquired lover, but let it slide for the moment. “Train with me,” he basically demanded. “I need to see what areas I’ve lost my edge.”

The Water Hashira froze for a second before he forced an amused smile onto his face “Alright” he nodded, still a little reluctant. “I don’t think you could lose your edge that quickly though.”

Sanemi grinned and happily led the way to a training yard. Behind him, however, Tomioka let his smile fall. Ever since the accident, he hadn’t been able to wield his katana accurately. Giyu knew he wasn’t the one who stabbed Sanemi, yet he still felt his blood on his hand when they wrapped around the hilt of the blade. Every time he touched it, he saw himself standing over his Sanemi’s limp body. How could he confidently use the weapon that nearly killed the man he had fallen oh so in love with?

Too soon, they arrived in one of the many training yards and he was forced to draw his blade. Almost immediately, the image of Sanemi impaled through the chest with the katana flashed in front of him. Giyu’s hands began to shake as he attempted to tell himself it wasn’t real; he knew it wasn’t real, but that didn’t stop the panic that shot through his chest. Suddenly, as if the hilt itself was burning his palms, he threw the blade onto the ground and wrapped his arms around himself. He squeezed himself tightly as he tried to anchor himself back to reality, but suddenly he was covered in blood, and none of it was his own. 

Sanemi, witnessing it all, instantly ran over and hovered over Giyu, unaware if touching the other hashira was the best choice. Instead, he moved so he was directly in front of Giyu and in his line of sight. 

“Giyu, hey,” he said, tentatively touching Giyu’s arms. “It’s okay. Everything is okay. I’m here to help you.”

Giyu closed his eyes tightly before he muttered his answer. “Just-Hold me, please . Just for a second.”

Sanemi wasted no time wrapping his arms around Giyu, holding him tightly as he whispered sweet nothings in his ear, and occasionally pressed a kiss to his ear or cheek. As he did this, Sanemi was still trying to figure out what had been so triggering for the Water Hashira. He glanced at the ground at the katana, and somehow it clicked into place. He pulled back from Giyu just enough so they could look each other in the eyes. 

“Giyu, you know what happened that night wasn’t at all youtube fault, right?” Sanemi asked, despite already knowing the answer. 

Tomioka shook his head. “That was my blade. My responsibility,” he said, his tone bitter and frustrated. “If I had just hung onto the damn thing, that demon would have never been able to use it.”

“That demon was strong, Giyu. Hella strong for a normal one. You couldn’t have known that shit would happen,” Sanemi argued gently before holding Giyu’s face, squeezing his cheeks ever so slightly. “Look, I wouldn’t have done it any differently either. Even if I could go back in time, I’d jump in front of that blade everytime. Ask me why.”

Giyu raised an eyebrow inquisitively. “Why?”

Sanemi smiled and pecked Giyu’s squished lips. “Because in the end, all that pain was worth getting you as my lover.

Giyu frowned and finally pulled away and rubbed his previously squished cheeks. “That’s not a good reason-.”

"Nope,” Sanemi cut him off, covering his ears. “I can’t hear you.”

The Water Hashira gave his lover a deadpan look. “Sanemi-.”

“Sorry, I don’t speak bullshit,” Sanemi quipped back. 

“You’re pushing it, Shinazugawa,” Giyu growled, a faint smirk on his face. 

Sanemi raised an eyebrow challengingly. “Whatcha gonna do about it, Waterboy?”

Before he could react at all, the Wind Hashira found his body being tackled into the dirt. He grunted as his back met the hard ground, but began to fight back. Eventually, he got the upper hand and flipped them over so Giyu’s back was in the dirt now. Tomioka couldn’t help but crack an amused smile at the sight above him. Sanemi’s white hair and haori were now more of a light brown due to the dirt. However, despite how cute Sanemi was, he refused to let him win. Giyu leaned up and pressed his lips to his fellow hashira’s. With Sanemi distracted, he quickly pushed himself on top and pinned the Wind Hashira’s arms above his head. 

“I win,” Giyu bragged with a cheeky smirk.

Sanemi scowled. “Because you used a cheap-as-dirt trick,” he protested.

“That worked,” Giyu pointed out before he got off Sanemi.

Sanemi let out a small chuckle, finding it harder to stay mad at Giyu unlike before. He accepted the hand Tomioka offered him, and dusted off what he could off his uniform and hair. 

“Let’s not train today. We’ll both take it in baby steps,” Sanemi said, earning a nod of approval from Giyu.

“Also,” *the Wind Hashira hummed before kissing Giyu’s cheek. “Thanks for trusting me with your weaknesses, Rivulet.

Tomioka’s eyes widened as he pulled back. “Rivulet?”

Sanemi’s eyes widened as a blush appeared on his ears. “I did not say that!”

Giyu smirked with amusement. “Sure,” he hummed with amusement. “Whatever you say, Zephyr .”      

“Now you’re just being cruel,” Sanemi mumbled before he wrapped his arms around Giyu’s neck. “Makin’ fun of my sweet nicknames for you. I only got one of those, Waterboy.”

Giyu smirked and rested his hands on Sanemi’s hips. “Now that you mention it, Rivulet does have a much nicer ring to it.”

The Wind Hashira grinned. “See? You should mock genius. Rivulet.”

“Come here, you” Giyu smirked before he connected their lips. 

Sanemi hummed contently as he smiled into the kiss. “Damn, someone’s being needy,” he teased.

“Of course I am,” Giyu chuckled. “You’re quite addictive.”

Sanemi tried to force the blush on his ears to disappear, but unfortunately anatomy doesn’t work like that. Before he could reply, he heard footsteps approaching and quickly moved away from Giyu, picking up a katana as he pretended to sharpen it. Shinobu poked her head into the courtyard. 

“Sanemi, I’ve been calling for you. It’s time for your daily check up and medicine,” Shinobu scowled softly.

“Alright, I’m coming, I’m coming,” Sanemi grumbled before he stood and began to walk away.

Before he left, he mouthed to Giyu. “Love you, my Rivulet.”

Giyu smiled fondly as he waved goodbye to Sanemi. Rivulet and Zephyr had a nice ring together. As far as nicknames go, these were bad at all. In fact, when he whispered the names out loud, he caught himself getting a little flustered.

Chapter Text

Sanemi worked with Giyu over the next week or so, doing everything in his power to get his lover back to being comfortable with his blade again. A demon slayer’s life depended on them trusting in their skills to hit the target. If Giyu wavered, it could very well cost him his life, and Sanemi  refused to let that happen. Especially after everything he went through to keep him alive to begin with. The Wind Hashira realized the harsh reality that he would not always be there to save Giyu, and the thought alone gripped his soul with a chill he had only felt once before. To remedy this predicament, he swore that if he couldn’t be there to protect his lover, he’d just have to kick Giyu back into shape so he could defend himself once more. 

Giyu was slowly becoming confident again though, and it was all thanks to Sanemi. Though, in reality, he was still frighteningly insecure about his abilities. How could he call himself the Water Hashira if he lost his only weapon so easily to a monster he should have been able to handle? His folly had nearly resulted in his love’s blood on his hands. He knew he wouldn’t have delivered the blow, but his katana did. That was the same thing in his eyes. He berated himself for not growing since Sabito’s death. His friend didn’t die so he could be this weak. 

Their daily training began like any other on this warm spring morning. However, this time they could tell it finally helped both of their skills. Sanemi could feel the familiar strength behind Giyu’s attacks, and similarly Giyu could see speed in Sanemi’s attacks increasing to normal.  Today, the Water Hashira took the initiative, rushing forward, blade held confidently and comfortably. Sanemi would deny his lagging response till the day his pride died with him, but it did take a second too long for him to roll out of the way. He bounced to his feet with anticipation and a bit of competitiveness after narrowly dodging the attack. However, Giyu didn’t slow and turned with another attack. Sanemi quickly blocked with his blade, using it as an aid to push his opponent back. Sanemi had the upper hand when it came to raw strength.

Surprisingly, Tomioka felt completely at ease for the first time since the accident. His mind was calm and quiet, and his movements flowed fluid like water. In the heat of their fight, Giyu recognized the calm, familiar place in his mind. This place of serenity while a fight raged outside. Like a drop of water creating a ripple of events, he felt his body moving like a river downstream, with the power of waves crashing upon stone. He pressed his blade against Sanemi’s neck, knowing now his body was in full control. He had won their match. 

Sanemi smirked and allowed his head to fall onto the pebbles on the training area. “You won,” he commented simply.

“It appears I did,” Giyu agreed with a small chuckle before helping his lover to his feet.

Sanemi dusted off his white haori before crossing his arms in his default stance. “How did you feel today?”

Giyu slid his katana into its sheath. “I felt completely at peace.” He smiled softly as he stared down at the hilt of his blade. 

“That’s great!” Sanemi smiled and moved a little closer so he could lace their  fingers together “I’m proud of you, really.”

Tomioka smiled fondly at their intertwined hands. “It wasn’t anything extraordinary. I’m simply back to the level I was at before.”

“Now you can get stronger, dumbass” the Wind Hashira chuckled, rolling his eyes as his lover came up with excuses to downplay his achievement..

“That’s true,” Giyu said with amusement toward his lover’s crudness..

Sanemi looked around, making sure no one was nearby or watching. Then he carefully brought Giyu’s hand up to their lips, pressing a soft kiss to his knuckles. The Water Hashira felt his cheeks heat up just a little, but he enjoyed the feeling of the innocent kiss nonetheless. Sanemi chuckled and poked his blushing cheek before pressing another kiss to the apple of his left cheek. Giyu glared playfully at him before kissing him on the lips in a much less innocent way. 

After Giyu attacked Sanemi with a passionate kiss, the couple settled on the porch of the building next to the training ground. They spoke of a variety of topics, from missions and demons they faced, to dreams they had, or fears that plagued them. Sanemi cockily claimed he had no fears, to which Giyu very bluntly argued. This led to a lighthearted, amusing argument between the two hashiras. To the unknowing eye, they simply appeared to be two comrades getting to know each other better. To them though, these little chats meant everything to them. These moments of solitude where it was just them two. After all, dating was basically illegal for them. 

However, Sanemi didn’t want to live his entire life without ever taking Giyu out. He had thought it over carefully and came up with a solution. It wasn’t uncommon to see two men eating somewhere together. They could simply be friends, or meeting for business. It was as foolproof as it was going to get. Sanemi turned to face his rivulet, smiling excitedly as he placed his hand over Giyu’s.

“I want to take you out on a proper date,” he said.

Tomioka’s eyes widened in surprise. “Zephyr, you know we can’t-” 

“I know,” Sanemi cut him off. “ but I have an idea, and I think it’ll work. I want  to treat you to at least one proper outing, Giyu, and I don’t want to wait for the rest of the damn world to come around and accept us.”

The black haired man debated over the idea for a minute before he sighed, smiling ever so softly. “We’re probably going to die because of demons anyways. One date wouldn’t hurt.”

“So…yes?” The Wind Hashira asked with a cheeky smirk.

Giyu rolled his eyes playfully. “Yes, Airhead, it’s a yes,” he confirmed.

      Sanemi quickly kissed him once more, pulling back with a content hum. “Perfect! Don’t worry, I’ll make it a date you’ll never forget, Waterboy.”

Chapter Text

The plan was simple. Get the item, take it to the restaurant, and go home. Easy mission. Giyu however raised an eyebrow and crossed his arms at his lover.

“I’m ‘the item’?” he asked unamused.

Sanemi chuckled and rubbed the back of his neck. “No, of course not, Rivulet.”

“Mhm, I’m sure,” Giyu said with an eye roll.

“Regardless, does it sound like a plan? Nothing too extravagant, just two men having a meal,” Sanemi shrugged.

Giyu nodded after a moment of contemplation. “It sounds reasonable. No one should be suspicious. You’ll pick me up tonight?”

 “Of course I will. I’m the man in this relationship,” the Wind Hashira boasted.

Giyu glared lightly at his airhead lover. “Says who exactly?”

“Says me” Sanemi grinned, a cocky glint in his eyes.

The Water Hashira didn’t have the energy to argue about this. However, knew he could top his lover any night. Instead of pointing this out, Giyu stood and began to walk away from the area they had previously been practicing in.

“I’m going home to clean myself, and change” he informed his lover before walking around the corner.

Sanemi bit his bottom lip as he realized he had never seen Giyu in anything other than his slayer uniform and that two patterned haori. It was gonna be interesting to see what his Rivulet had hiding in the back of his closet. Realizing he should probably do the same, Sanemi stood, cracked his spine, then headed home. He would need to tell his little brother he would be out that evening so that Genya wouldn’t make too much dinner. The two brothers had moved in together after they settled the past and moved toward the future. It was surprisingly nice having a roommate, especially one who could actually cut an onion. Damn onions with their stupid layers. 

𖣘𖣘𖣘

At home, Giyu let out a content sigh before sliding his zōri off and stepping into the house. To be honest, he had no idea if he had casual clothing now. He was so used to just changing into his uniform everyday. Additionally, he never went out before this. Sighing at this unexpected predicament, he went to his bathroom to draw a bath. After scrubbing his skin and hair thoroughly, he stepped out and walked to his bedroom as he dried his hair with a towel. Opening his wardrobe, he was met with the expected sight. He didn’t have much, barely anything that still fit at least, but he knew he had to find at least some sort of casual outfit.  

After rummaging through his wardrobe, he finally assembled an outfit he hoped would be appropriate. As he began to change, he tried to figure out what to do with all these too small clothes. Tanjiro could probably fit into some of the items in there. After getting his spontaneously assembled outfit on, the hashira studied his appearance in a mirror. It would have to do. He had on light grey hakama and a dark blue, casual kimono underneath. He doubted he’d need a haori tonight since it was meant to look casual, but a part of him felt naked without one. Compromising, he put on a simple navy blue haori, and went to his sitting room to read a book while he waited

𖣘𖣘𖣘

Meanwhile, Sanemi had returned home and told Genya about his evening plans. Obviously, his little brother was worried about their safety, but after some reassurance, he thought it was a sweet idea. The Wind Hashira went to the bathroom for a quick bath before changing into one of his few casual outfits. A black hakama and a casual, cream kimono. He briefly debated if he should try to look a little nicer for a first date, but eventually decided this was fine. After making sure Genya was going to be okay while he was away, Sanemi headed out. Thankfully, the trip to Giyu’s wasn’t a long one, and neither was the walk to town. 

𖣘𖣘𖣘

A knock on the front door startled Giyu. Instantly, his hand was going to where his katana usually resided. He panicked for a second when his hand met open air before he realized a demon wouldn’t knock. It was only Sanemi. Straightening his clothes, he opened the door and slid on his zōri. He hadn’t noticed his Zephyr’s shocked expression yet. 

Sanemi stood there gaping in awe. How on earth did he get so lucky? Also why the fuck Giyu look so much better then him? The Wind Hashira chuckled softly, almost breathlessly, catching his lover’s attention.

“What?” Tomioka asked with a soft, amused smile.

“Nothing, nothing,” Sanemi chuckled. “Just- you look great without the usual uniform.”

Giyu looked to the side and tried to hide his dumb blush. Sanemi just laughed and tugged on his sleeve to get moving. The village they planned on going to was about a 2 mile walk. They’d get there right as the sun began to set. As they walked, the two of them laughed, played and even chased each other like two kids in love. It felt refreshing to be able to do this after years of prioritizing killing demons and protecting others.

The two lovers arrived at the village entrance right as the sun began to set, just as Sanemi guessed. From there, the Wind Hashira led his lover to a quaint, cozy noodle and dumpling shop, where they were taken to a table for two. So far it seemed like his assumption was right. No one had given them a second glance, simply assuming they were friends hanging out. Giyu decided to let his guard down just the tiniest bit. Afterall, this was supposed to be their first and maybe last date ever. He might as well make it count.

They ordered and then got their noodles easily enough, no comment or side-glances. That was good. Sanemi wanted this evening to work out where they could make memories, but still stay safe from society. He loved Giyu, but he also had a brother he had to take care of. Genya and his Rivulet were of equal importance to him, and being discovered would lead to both getting hurt in some way. Everything was going well until he and Giyu both heard a scream coming from outside in the street. Without thinking, they both shot up and sprinted out with Sanemi in the lead.

About a block away, they found a crowd of people standing around something. It was obviously a fight of some kind, but they couldn’t see into the middle. Sanemi shoved his way to the front, making it, before his entire body froze in horror. He felt Giyu tense up beside him at the sight as well. In the middle were two young boys, no older than sixteen or seventeen. One was being held back by two older boys, who looked too much like him to be strangers. The other was being beaten ruthlessly by who he assumed to be the first boy’s father.

“You fucking monster!” The older man shouted as he set another kick flying into the fallen boy’s ribs.

The restrained boy let out another cry. “Father, stop it! I beg of you!!” he screamed.

The man didn’t listen and continued to beat the already unconscious boy. “He turned you into a freak like him!” he roared. “A faggot!”

As soon as that word left the man’s lips, Sanemi barreled forward, ramming into the man’s side. Giyu reacted a second later, running at the two boys holding their little brother back. He took them out easily, allowing the younger boy to frantically make his way to his fallen lover. Giyu followed and made sure no one else came near the young couple as Sanemi took care of the father. The Wind Hashira was currently beating the homophobic man up like he had been doing to the boy a mere second ago.

“Not so fun huh?” he snapped as he landed another punch across the man’s cheek. 

Sanemi would have continued beating the man if Giyu hadn’t caught his arm. “You’ll kill him,” the Water Hashira said, his voice cold but steady. 

Sanemi knew his lover was trying to keep him from being punished. As a hashira, if news got out he murdered someone, there would be consequences.  Reluctantly, he stood. He turned and spit on the man’s cheek though.

“You’re disgusting,” he spat out. 

The crowd had disappeared as soon as the fight turned in the young couple’s favor, and the cowardly father had crawled away as soon as he was freed. Sanemi turned and looked toward the two young boys. The one who had been restrained was sobbing as he buried his face in his lover’s neck. Those sobs slowly turned to wails, and that’s when Sanemi realized they had been too late. Beside him, Giyu moved forward, and silently removed his haori. He gently laid it over the deceased boy. 

“C-come back,” the broken boy whispered to his lover. “Come back!” he repeated as another sob ripped its way out of his throat..

Sanemi walked over slowly, falling to his knees wordlessly. Giyu hesitantly placed a hand on the boy’s shoulder, his heart aching at his desperate, but useless cries. 

“Do you need help finding somewhere to stay?” Giyu finally asked softly.

The boy jolted, as if just realizing they were still there. He shook his head. 

“N…no. M-me and Aito were planning on running away to his c…cousin’s home. W…we’d be accepted there.” he explained shakily. “I know the way.”

Giyu nodded. “Then you should leave before one of those monsters comes back” he urged, but the boy whimpered. 

“I can't," he sobbed. “Aito…he needs a burial. I owe him that much.”

Giyu nodded. “We’ll help you” he said softly and reached to pick up the body “May I?”

The boy hesitated before loosening his grip and nodding wordlessly. Giyu carefully picked up the body, holding Aito as if he was made of porcelain. Sanemi stood up as well and held his hand out to the sniffling boy.

“What’s your name?” he asked hoarsely, his own throat feeling tight.

The boy wiped his cheeks before answering. “Ren,” he said. “Just Ren, I don’t have a family anymore.”

Sanemi nodded and carefully pulled Ren to his feet. He placed a hand on the boy’s back, guiding him out of town to a more quiet place. There, beneath a large tree, they buried Aito. They all said a silent prayer before Ren let another whimper slip out. Giyu turned and placed a comforting hand on the boy’s shoulder once more. Sanemi could only stare down at the freshly laid dirt, wondering what would have happened if they came sooner. 

“Ren,” Giyu began. “You must leave now. You have to run and stay safe, for Aito.”

“I will,” Ren nodded as he tried to stop his tears. “I’ll never come back here.”

Giyu nodded. “Get,” he said and gently patted Ren’s back, watching as the boy began to run out of the forest.

However, the boy paused before he got too far, and turned around. “Are you like me?” he asked.

Giyu was surprised by Ren’s forwardness, but replied with a soft nod. 

Ren smiled softly. “Thank you,” he said. “I hope to meet you both again one day,” he said earnestly before disappearing outside the treeline.

The Water Hashira waved goodbye before turning to his lover. He gently rubbed his lover’s arm.

“Sanemi, let’s go home” he whispered.

The Wind Hashira nodded wordlessly and followed his lover out of the forest. He was quiet the entire journey back to Giyu’s home. There, he finally spoke. 

“We could’ve saved him,” he mumbled.

Giyu looked over with sadness in his eyes. “I know, but at least we were there at all. If we weren’t, Ren would have most likely died too.”

“I hate this world,” Sanemi spat out. “I protect it, and the people, and I can’t even kiss my lover without something like that happening.”

“I know,” Giyu whispered and hugged his Zephyr from behind. “I know.”

Tears began to run down Sanemi’s cheeks, even though he desperately tried to hold them back. Instead he just placed one of his hands over Giyu’s and squeezed them softly. Giyu had never seen his lover this way, so he knew how much Sanemi was truly hurting. Carefully, he led them back to his room, laying on the futon and allowing his Zephyr to lay on his chest. 

Sanemi sobbed for hours after he realized he was safe with Giyu. He could finally let these emotions, he normally saw as weaknesses, show. He hated this world. People like that monster of a father didn’t deserve his protection, or the blood he had shed to keep the demons at bay. He hated that he couldn't treat his Rivulet in public  like every “normal” couple could. Sanemi couldn’t sleep that night. Every time he closed his eyes, he saw Aito’s lifeless body being kicked, and heard Ren’s wails

Sanemi and Giyu lay together that night, wrapped in each others’ arms. They both knew sleep wouldn’t come easy tonight, and clung to the comforting presence of the other man. Tonight had been a bitter reminder of just how taboo their relationship was. Could they actually love each other in the  world they lived in?

Chapter Text

The next morning, Giyu was awakened by a soft knocking on his front door. He blinked away the sleep before he glanced down at the weight on his chest. Sanemi was still asleep, after a restless night. Tear stains were still on his cheeks, and his lover’s arms were wrapped tightly around his body. Giyu let out a soft sigh as memories of the previous night came flooding back. He carefully detangled himself from Sanemi’s arms and made his way to the door. He hoped whoever was disturbing them didn’t care that he was shirtless. In all honesty, he could care less at the moment about his appearance anyways. 

Opening the door, he was surprised to see Genya standing there. That’s when he noticed the soft rainfall outside too. Quickly, he pulled the teen boy inside and rushed to grab him a towel. When he returned, Genya was still standing in the same place he left him. The boy was fiddling with his fingers, as if he was nervous to move any further into the home. Giyu quickly made his way back over, and motioned for Genya to lean down a little. The boy bent down, allowing the Water Hashira to dry off his hair, and wrap the towel around his shoulders.

"What were you thinking walking in the rain?” Giyu scolded gently. “Your home is almost six miles away.”.

Genya looked down sheepishly. “Sanemi told me not to expect him home, but he did say he’d be back by the time I left for training with Mr. Himejima” he explained.

“And he wasn't,” Giyu sighed. .

The teen nodded and looked to the side, seemingly able to sense something had happened during their date last night. He seemed hesitant to ask though. Giyu could understand why. He and Genya were still getting to know one another. 

“What happened?” the teen asked finally.

Now it was Giyu’s turn to debate over what to say. Genya was already fearful enough of who he was and who he loved. However, it was important, even if it was hard to hear. Especially for a  young man like himself, Genya needed to learn about what truly happened to people like them. Giyu sighed and motioned for the teen to sit down on a zabuton.

“I’ll explain everything,” he promised as he went to heat up some tea.

And he did. Giyu explained everything that happened the previous evening in detail. As he went on, he watched the color drain from Genya’s face, and the teen’s eyes widened in horror. He knew Sanemi wouldn’t have told the story so accurately, but Giyu felt that it was the right thing to do. Genya needed to know the harsh reality they lived in as homosexuals. When he finished the disgusting story, he waited for Genya’s reaction.

The teen was silent for a few minutes. 

Finally, he decided on his first question. “Do you think that will ever happen to you or nii-chan?” he asked.

“Possibly, but we’re capable of taking care of ourselves. We’re aware of the dangers, which is why we never go out together like last night,” Tomioka answered.

“Could this happen to me?” Genya asked, his voice softer.

Giyu paused. He momentarily wondered if he had made the wrong choice sharing the crime from last night. The last thing he wanted was for the boy to be afraid of being who he was. However, Giyu did want him to be cautious.

“Possibly,” he finally answered. “Which is why it’s important to be mindful.”

The teen nodded, and seemed to even take some comfort in Giyu’s last comment. They sat in contemplative silence for about ten minutes before Sanemi walked into the sitting room. The Wind Hashira’s eyes widened at the sight of his little brother there. Wordlessly though, the older Shinazugawa brother walked over and pulled Genya into a tight, desperate hug. Genya understood his nii-chan’s strange behavior and didn’t comment on it. Instead, he wrapped his arms around his brother’s neck and held tightly. Giyu decided to give them some space, and went to prepare a proper breakfast.

However, a few minutes later, Sanemi joined him. His lover wrapped his arms around Giyu’s waist and placed a chaste kiss on his shoulder. Both men stood in silence for a minute, lost in the repetitive movement of Giyu cracking eggs and cutting vegetables. Finally, Sanemi spoke.

“You told him about last night, didn’t you?” Sanemi accused, but there was no real heat behind his tone.

Giyu simply nodded in response. Sanemi sighed. 

“I can’t say I’m upset about it, but I also can’t say I’m extremely happy either. Genya’s young. He shouldn’t have to worry about things like that yet,” The Wind Hashira mumbled against Giyu’s shoulder..

Giyu glanced back at his Zephyr before answering. “Ren and Aito were his age.”

Sanemi tensed up instantly at that grim reminder. His grip around Giyu also grew tighter. The Water Hashira sighed, regretting his words. He didn’t mean to bring up recent, bitter memories just yet.

“I’m sorry,” he said, attempting to explain some of his baffling reasoning.“I just don’t want Genya living carelessly, and end up getting hurt like Ren and Aito. I want him to love like them, but not end up in a situation like them.”

“Thank you, Giyu,” Sanemi interrupted.  “For doing the hard thing I can’t do. I don’t think I could stand ruining Genya’s life anymore than I already have.”

With that last comment, Tomioka immediately put the vegetable he was cutting down, and turned to face Sanemi. He gingerly brought his lover’s face up so they were looking at each other before he spoke.

“Sanemi Shinazugawa, you did not ruin that boy’s life, “Giyu said seriously. “You have always had his best interest in mind, even if you went about it in the worst way possible, you still did everything for Genya. He understands that, and holds no ill will towards you. He never did. You’re the only one who is still caught up in those lost years”

Sanemi looked like a kicked puppy, a look the Water Hashira never thought he’d see on his face. However, another part of him regretted his words as soon as he saw his lover’s face. Giyu went to apologize, but was cut off by Sanemi.

“No, you’re right, Rivulet” Sanemi sighed, rubbing a hand over the nape of his neck. “I’m just worried I’m gonna mess up again, and then last night- I just don’t want Genya getting hurt for loving.”

“I know,” Tomioka sighed. “Despite his age though, he won’t fall easily, not with you and Gyomei training him. Genya is smart too, he knows better and knows the world he lives in now.”

Sanemi went to respond when a younger voice chimed in. “Nemi, you really don’t need to worry like this.”

The Wind Hashira spun around and sighed at the sight of his little brother in the kitchen entrance. “I know, bud, but you’re the last of my family. You can’t blame me for being a little overprotective.”. 

The teen smiled softly and walked over. “I don’t have much, but I have a hug if you want it,” he said as a reply. .

Sanemi laughed, a real laugh, and wrapped his arms around his brother. Genya instantly hugged back, joining in the laughter. Giyu smiled softly and turned to get back to breakfast, only to be yanked back again. Suddenly, he was being squeezed between the two brothers. His Zephyr grinned cheekily, and Giyu knew then that Sanemi had been the one to pull him into this group hug. The Water Hashira smiled fondly before he readjusted. Now, Sanemi and Giyu were both hugging Genya between them. The two lovers smiled as they embraced the young teen, who would soon be forced to face the cruelty of society toward him. However, this morning, they were together and that’s all that mattered at the moment.

Chapter Text

Eventually, Genya left to make it his lessons with Gyomei in time, and Giyu and Sanemi had to attend to their duties as hashira as if nothing had happened. It didn’t matter if they were still grieving young Aito and his lost future. In this world, they weren’t supposed to care, so that was the face they had to take up. Upon entering HQ, they were forced to acknowledge the bitter reality that they weren’t safe, even here. Obanai and Tengen were standing near the entrance, discussing a painfully familiar incident that had occurred last night.. 

“Two boys,” Tengen explained. “They were in romantic relationships, and one was killed. No one knows where the other boy went. It happened in a village to the South.”

Obanai was leaning against a wisteria tree. “If you ask me, they were asking for it. It’s not right loving someone of the same sex,” he said, his tone as blunt and harsh as ever.

Tengen rolled his eyes at Obanai’s bluntness. ``”I understand your feelings. I’m not exactly advocating for same-sex relationships, but you have to take into account they were no older than Sanemi’s brother. Maybe if the boy who passed had more time, he could have realized his errors.”

Sanemi clenched his hands into fist at their words. He didn’t notice they were turning white until he felt another hand subtly hold one of his fists. Giyu was angry too, but he knew Sanemi would lash out quicker than himself. Silently, he told his lover to calm himself. Thankfully, Sanemi gradually relaxed. He let out a shaky breath before turning stiffly on his heels and walking to another area. Giyu sighed and followed his lover to make sure he didn’t do anything rash. He knew Sanemi wasn’t actually calming down, he was simply removing himself from the area. 

Giyu caught up with his lover, catching his arm gently. “Sanemi, you must calm down,” he said firmly.

The Wind Hashira violently ripped his arm away. “How?” he snapped furiously. “How can you even think about being calm after hearing the people you’re supposed to trust, talking so disgustingly about people like you? Not to mention we were there. We were there when Aito died, and when Ren was cradling his body. We saw everything, and all they’re concerned about is if those boys got what they deserved.”

Giyu frowned, looking down at the ground. He shared Sanemi’s feelings. He wouldn’t deny it. These people, who they’ve fought beside, and protected, would strike them down for loving. However, with this, he also realized they absolutely could not allow their relationship to come to light. No matter how unfair it was. Letting out a sigh meant to calm himself, the Water Hashira finally answered.

“I understand how you feel, Zephyr,” he replied softly. “But I’m also aware of the fact we can’t act like this. If we reveal that we support others like us, that we’re like this, it could cost us everything. We need to choose our battles carefully, and frankly this is a battle we won’t be able to win. Only time can fight this battle.”

Sanemi bit his bottom lip in frustration, his gaze turning downcast as Giyu moved closer. He reached out and cupped one of Sanemi’s cheeks, gently stroking his thumb over the skin.

“I know,” Sanemi finally spoke. “I know we can’t win this. I just want to be able to be myself around them. Tengen and Obanai are my closest friends, and hearing those words coming from their mouths,-" he cut himself off as he closed his eyes, almost as if the reminder of their hate physically hurt him. 

“It hurts.”

“I know,” Tomioka whispered, leaning in and resting his forehead against his Zephyr’s. “Just keep holding on. If not for the Demon Slayers, or the Master, or even the world, hold on for me.”

Sanemi let out a shaky breath, still reluctant. However, one more glance at Giyu’s desperate gaze, he caved.

“Okay,” he whispered.

With his agreement, and after Sanemi calmed down, the two left each others’ sides and headed out on their respective missions. 

𖣘𖣘𖣘

Over in Gyomei’s courtyard, Genya and the Stone Hashira were busy training. Today they were working on honing their focus, which is another reason Gyoemi couldn’t help but take notice of his student’s distraction. When Genya was hit by an attack that had been obvious, Gyomie decided it was time for a break. The teen was flung back a ways, coughing as dirt rose from his impact on the ground. Gyomei watched Genya get back on his feet, and as he did so, the Stone Hashira tried to make sense of his student’s sudden distance. Suddenly, he sensed the young Tanjiro Kamado nearby. That’s when Gyomei put two and two together. 

“Genya, come sit with me,” Gyomei smiled gently, walking to sit on his knees under the shade of a wisteria tree.

Genya swallowed nervously before following suit, and sitting in the same way in front of his mentor. “Yes?” he asked tentatively. 

“I wanted to ask you about your relationship with the boy, Tanjiro,” Gyomei explained, his hands remaining in a prayer position.

Genya stiffened, mind beginning to panic. “We’re not close,” he said, probably too quickly. “I only know him because of the Final Examination and our time at the Swordsmith Village.”

“I see,” Gyomei chuckled. “However, you’d think if one cared for another in the way you truly do, they’d be brave enough to at least say hello.”

The teen felt his ears grow hot and the heat soon traveled to his cheeks. “I don’t understand Himejima-san” he lied, trying to keep his voice steady.

“Genya, I might be physically blind, but I can still see the fondness you have for him,” Gyomei smiled softly. “You always become quite distracted whenever Tanjiro is around.”

Genya’s heart began to wildly as panic rose within him. His mentor knew. Himejima-san knew he liked another boy. What would happen? Would he be cast out of the corps? Would Nemi be discovered as well? Questions raced and scattered throughout his mind, causing his breathing to quicken. Gyomei noticed his student's behavior and leaned forward, pulling the panicking boy into a firm hug.

“Genya, I am not disgusted, nor am I going to share this knowledge with another person,” Gyomei promised.

The teen froze before returning the hug, trying to steady his rapid beating heart. “You don’t hate me?” he asked, uncertainty, and a new vulnerability in his tone. 

“Of course not. Though there are others who don’t agree with boys and girls like you, I am not one of them,” Gyomei said reassured sincerely. “I’ve lived long enough, and have been through enough to know that love is hard to come by today. No one should destroy a genuine bond because of the gender of their lover.”

Genya could only nod in agreement, eyes beginning to water in relief that Himejima didn’t hate people like him and Nemo. In truth, Genya lived in constant fear, though he hid it well. It was almost ironic how he could face a demon but began to shake whenever someone stared too long. When he came to the Demon Slayer Corps, he didn’t know why he expected different views. At the end of the day, though they fought for a noble cause, the Demon Slayers were still made up of people who hated homosexuals. He never expected a Hashira, out of everyone, to be so accepting. 

Gyomei pulled back enough to look down at his student, wiping a stray tear from Genya’s wide eyes. “Don’t you think you should go talk to young Tanjiro?” he smiled kindly, subtly dismissing Genya..

The teen smiled brightly, even though a small blush made its way to his cheeks. “I probably should,” he agreed as he stood. “I’ll be right back Himejima-san,” he added over his shoulder as he ran in the direction Tanjiro went.

The Stone Hashira smiled to himself as he sat back down with his legs crossed. “Take your time, Young Genya. Love waits for no one, but I most certainly can” he said fondly.

Chapter Text

A month later, the accident still weighed heavily on Sanemi’s conscience. In addition to that, he just couldn’t act the same around Tengen and Obanai. He could never forget their words on the murder of Aito, and how heartless his so-called comrades were towards people like Giyu and him. Giyu did his best to console his lover, but in the end, it was almost a fruitless effort. Sanemi didn’t have the heart to trust their fellow hashira anymore, but Giyu knew that could be deadly. 

For in that same time, demon appearance had slowed to nearly a halt. Giyu knew Muzan was slowly closing in, especially after Nezuko had conquered the sun. The cogs to a plot had begun, and Giyu had a sickening feeling it would change their world forever. However, the Master didn’t waste the sudden free time the Demon Slayers had, and began having the hashira, plus the retired Tengen, begin training the rest of the corps. However, Giyu wasn’t planning on participating. How could he when he wasn’t the true Water Hashira?

He said this at the meeting that decided what each hashira would train in. He didn’t know how triggered it would make Sanemi. However, he should have seen it coming in a way. Sanemi had been so paranoid, and so emotional lately, that Giyu’s words had just made him snap. Then again, he hadn’t used the best phrasing. He claimed he was different from the others, but regardless, it was the truth. 

That night, Sanemi came to his home obviously furious. “What the hell do you mean you’re different from us?” Sanemi snarled. 

Giyu sighed. He had expected this to happen.

“I know what it sounded like-” 

“Then you should know why I’m pissed,” Sanemi cut in sharply.

Tomioka pressed his lips into a thin line in annoyance. “I am well aware as to why, but I didn’t mean it in that way” he said, trying to keep the irritation in his voice to a minimum.

“What other way is there?” Sanemi asked, unconvinced, as he crossed his arms.

“It’s not important,” Giyu dismissed coldly, turning to exit the room.

Sanemi caught his wrist before he could escape. “Screw what you think is important or not, Waterboy. I’m being serious. How the hell are we different from each other? We’re both hashira who are going to need that damn mark if we want any chance to take out Muzan,” he snapped. 

Giyu growled this time as he ripped his wrist away. “I said it’s not important, goddammit!” he snapped. “I have better things to do than this, so please leave.”

Sanemi let out a frustrated noise. “Better things than talking to me?”

“Better things than arguing with you,” Giyu hissed as he went to his room and shut the door.

Sanemi was seething. He let out a yell of frustration before he stormed out the door. 

𖣘𖣘𖣘

Giyu sighed in memory of that day. Things had only gotten worse from that point. Sanemi wasn’t the only one who still thought of that accident. As a result, Giyu decided to put distance between him and his Zephyr. He ended their training sessions, then began to stand away from Sanemi during meetings. He was trying to protect them publicly. That way no one would ever have a chance at finding out. He had to go back to being the emotionless, stoic, Giyu Tomioka. 

On the other hand, Sanemi wanted the opposite. What the Water Hashira didn’t realize was that everytime he moved away from his lover, Sanemi’s heart cracked a little. This wasn’t fair. All he wanted was to hug his Rivulet, to spar and mess around. He didn’t want this brief eye contact that always ended with Giyu looking away first.

Since the start of all these factors, their relationship had become more tense than before they were even a couple. It put the other Hashira, Demon Slayers and even the Kakushi on edge. It was like all the progress of tolerance had come to an abrupt halt, then declined. Despite their disagreements, whenever one would crawl into bed and curl up next to the other, it spoke every unsaid word. Those small moments were the only thing they were clinging onto now. Even then, it wasn’t much.

𖣘𖣘𖣘

The sun was setting, and the moon was in the sky, when Sanemi quietly entered Giyu’s room and crawled under the blanket. Giyu responded almost instinctively and lifted his arm for his Zephyr to curl closer. However, this night they didn’t simply doze back into slumber. Sanemi had questions and he wanted answers.

“Giyu, it’s been a week now. Please tell me why you think you’re so different from us. Hashira Training has begun, and I hear you still won’t join,” he whispered pleadingly.

The Water Hashira tensed under him before he sighed. “You’re still stuck on that?” he asked, his tone unreadable.

Sanemi looked up at Giyu. “Yes, I am. Are you going to answer this time?"

“No,” Giyu sighed and turned the other way so his back now faced his lover. “Please, for both our sakes, let it go.”

The Wind Hashira let out a frustrated growl. “Why can’t you tell me? Just tell me the truth. I won’t be mad either way, and I’ll help you with anything you need. But we need you, Giyu. Hell, I need you,” he said desperately. 

“Just let it go,” Giyu snapped.

Sanemi’s eyes widened. When had Giyu begun speaking to him so coldly again? Without another word, he moved away from Giyu, and exited the room. He paused outside the door, silently praying for his lover to come after him; for Giyu to give him some sort of sign he still wanted this relationship like Sanemi did. The bedroom door didn’t open behind him. Sanemi let his tears flow freely down his cheeks after he waited for five minutes. He tore away from the bedroom and ran out of the house altogether. Unbeknownst to him, as soon as the front door slammed behind him, Giyu let his tears fall too. 

Sanemi ran all the way back to his own home, not minding his burning lungs as they worked overtime against his tears and running. Soon, he arrived home, and instead of trying to sneak in, he simply fumbled with the door and all but collapsed through it. Genya, who was never a heavy sleeper, awoke instantly at the loud thud. He rushed into the main room to find the intruder, only to find his strong nii-chan curled against the wall, sobbing violently. Genya didn’t waste any time rushing over to his older brother. Upon pulling Sanemi into a tight hug, the older Shinazugawa brother began to cry into his brother’s shoulder. Sanemi could hardly catch his breath now as he clung to Genya’s shirt, sobbing all his pain and frustration out. 

As Genya sat with his brother, he wondered what exactly happened. He knew Giyu and Sanemi had been going through difficulties, but he hadn’t realized it was this bad. It was almost scary though. Genya had never seen Sanemi like this. Even when Sanemi was forced to kill their mother, his expression at the end was numb, but there were no tears when Genya arrived. All he could really do now was hold and support his brother, something he wasn’t able to do all these years ago when their mom died. 

As the moon rose higher, and both Sanemi and Giyu sobbed into the night, they couldn’t help but share a thought. One that scared them more than any demon.

“Is this the end for us?”

Chapter Text

The next morning, Sanemi awoke to the sun shining down in his eyes, which was odd because his room had blinds. Then it all came rushing back to him. The argument, the tears, the emotions, and sobbing into Genya’s shoulder. He just fell asleep against the wall. He looked down and found Genya still with him, his head on Sanemi’s lap. Sanemi smiled fondly and gently kissed his little brother’s head. He still struggled being affectionate with Genya after years apart, but after last night, it felt right. 

Carefully, he lifted Genya’s head off his lap, and used his haori as a makeshift pillow for his brother. Then he headed to the kitchen to make breakfast. As he began cutting up some lotus root, his mind unwillingly wandered to Giyu. The chopping stopped as he leaned against the counter, and he wondered if his lover was awake by now. As his mind filled with thoughts of his lover, it also filled with their fight from last night. Should he just let this go? He wondered if Giyu was thinking about him as much as he was thinking about his Rivulet. 

He sighed and forced his thoughts away from his lover. He finished cooking the root, and began making some hard boiled eggs, when Genya wandered into the kitchen. His little brother took an apple from the fruit bowl that Sanemi had recently begun to keep full. Genya fiddled with the fruit for a minute before he asked the question Sanemi expected.

“Sanemi, what happened last night?” Genya asked gently.

Sanemi let out a deep sigh. “Me and Giyu got into an argument,” he replied simply.

“Just an argument?” his little brother pushed slightly.

“Yes-,” Sanemi sighed again. 

Genya deserved to know after having to put up with him last night.  

“No, it wasn’t just an argument. Recently, we haven’t been seeing eye to eye on certain things, and that might’ve been the breaking point for us” he admitted, his eyes holding a deep sadness.

Genya stayed quiet, thinking over his next words carefully. “Can I give my honest opinion, Nemi?” he asked finally. “You can’t get mad either,” he added.

“Uh oh, that’s never good,” Sanemi joked weakly before growing serious again. 

He turned to give his brother his full attention. He crossed his arms as he leaned his hip against the counter.

“You can tell me,” he said sincerely. “I won’t get mad.”

“I don’t think this was your breaking point,” the younger Shinazugawa said. “I don’t think you’ll ever have a breaking point.”

Sanemi frowned. “Genya, no relationship is perfect-”

“No, Sanemi, listen to me. I know relationships aren’t perfect, but I also know how rare pairings like you and Giyu are. You two found each other, despite everything. Maybe it was fate or just sheer luck, but it still happened, and I don’t think either of you are willing to let each other go this easily. You’re both stubborn, and you both know how to fight for the things you care about. I know you can fight for your love too.” 

The Wind Hashira stared at his little brother for a minute, taken aback at Genya’s passionate words. As much as it pained him to say it, his little broth was right. When did little Genya get to be so damn smart? Sanemi chuckled and looked back up at his brother.

“Can you finish up breakfast?” he asked. “I have somewhere I need to be.”

The teen smiled knowingly. “I can. Now go,” he urged and pushed his brother lightly. 

Sanemi chuckled before he ran to his room and changed into his uniform and haori. Then he was out the front door. He figured Giyu was already at HQ by now. That loveable bastard always got there early. As he made his way to headquarters, he ran over what he might say in his head. After all, he had been the pushy one. In his eyes, Sanemi saw this as his fault and he had to be the one to fix it. 

Little did he know, Giyu felt the exact same way. 

The white haired man sighed before he picked up his pace. He had to fix this before he lost one of the best things that ever happened to him. However, on the way, he suddenly heard a familiar voice. He stopped and crept closer to the sound. Soon, he came upon a bridge that was set over a small river. Standing atop, was his Rivulet and that dumb demon lover, Tanjiro. He was about to make his presence known, when Giyu spoke, and his words stopped Sanemi in his tracks.

“I don’t think I’m deserving of the title of a hashira,” Giyu said to Tanjiro.

The Wind Hashira froze in his steps, eyes wide in disbelief. Giyu thought he didn’t deserve the title? In Sanemi’s eyes, his lover was one of the best, which was one reason he had hated- or strongly disliked the guy for a while. Deciding to keep listening, he stayed where he was and waited for the other to continue. He had to get to the bottom of this.

“I never actually passed the Final Selection. In truth, I was too weak and didn’t kill even one demon on that mountain. A dear friend of mine, Sabito, was the only one who perished during that selection. He single handedly slayed almost every demon on that mountain,” Giyu explained.

Sanemi thought for a minute. The name Sabito didn’t ring a bell. He knew Giyu trained under a formal water hashira named Urokodaki. Sabito must have trained alongside Giyu. Genya mentioned hearing of a mutated demon on the mountain during his Final Selection too, one that was stronger than it should have been. Could that demon have been alive when Giyu took the Final Selection? 

Then another piece of information whirled in his mind. Giyu never passed the Final Selection. He got in by default. But he technically did. The rules were to survive seven days, right? It didn’t say jackshit about having to kill a number of demons. 

Giyu continued. “I am unworthy of standing beside the other Hashira as an equal. Now you see, I’m not like them. The blunt truth is, I never should’ve been given a place in the Demon Slayer ranks.”

He wasn’t like them. Sanemi felt guilt flood into his entire body as he finally understood. Giyu hadn’t been saying he was better than them. He had been saying he was less than them. That wasn’t true though. His Rivulet was brilliant, and powerful. Now Sanemi understood why his lover had been avoiding the conversation. There were obviously bad memories involved, but he most likely didn’t want to burden anyone with the information, and the insecurity he had been feeling for who knows how long.

Sanemi felt even more guilty as he began to piece together the reason for Giyu’s cold shoulder. Quietly, he left the area and began to walk to HQ. As he moved, he began to come up with a plan to fix things. He wasn’t about to let what they had go to ruin because he couldn’t take a hint and leave something alone. Giyu deserved more than his asshole self, but he hoped he would forgive him.  

However, the more he thought about it, the more he struggled to think of a way to get Giyu alone.. Sanemi knew his lover would be avoiding him like a plague, which meant he had to come up with an excuse Giyu couldn’t deny. Finally, he decided on something, whether it was a good idea or not.  

𖣘𖣘𖣘

So, Sanemi found Giyu the next day. “Oi, Giyu,” he called. 

Giyu visibly tensed at the sound of his voice. He turned, mouth open to reply, but Sanemi beat him to the mark. 

“Spar me,” he all but demanded. “Since you’re not involved in the Hashira Training, you need this.”

Giyu shot him a look pretty close to a glare, but surprisingly, he nodded. “Fine. Meet me at my manor this afternoon.”

And that’s how Sanemi and Giyu ended up in Giyu’s courtyard. The tension could be cut with a knife as they both wielded wooden katanas. 

“Ready, Waterboy?” Sanemi asked, resting the wooden sword on his shoulder. 

Giyu faced him with an emotionless, almost bored face. One Sanemi hadn’t been pointed in his direction in a long time. “I’m ready,” was all Giyu responded with.

Taking a stance and breathing deeply to calm his emotions, Sanemi burst forward. Using his first form, he sent a swift attack down on his opponent's bamboo sword; it was hard enough to nick it. However, Giyu was more than prepared, and retaliated once he regained his footing. Unfortunately, at the same moment, Sanemi had prepared another attack and they ended up snapping each other’s swords in two. Sanemi growled. That hadn’t taken nearly as long as he hoped. He tossed the broken pieces aside, seemingly confusing Giyu.

“Why didn’t you tell me about your Final Selection?” Sanemi asked bluntly.

Giyu noticeably stiffened. “How did you find out?” he finally asked.

“You’re gonna be pissed,” Sanemi said. 

“I’m already pissed,” Giyu said bluntly. 

Sanemi rolled his eyes, a small growl escaping his lip. “I heard you talking to the Kamado kid. Why the hell did you tell him and not me?”

Giyu glared at him, not missing the implication Sanemi had been eavesdropping. He finally let out a mix between a growl and a sigh as he ran a hand down his face. 

“I didn’t feel like you needed to know. Tanjiro- he just understands things on another level, and I felt like I could be vulnerable with him at that moment. He could’ve become the new Water Hashira if he had stuck with the form. We have that and we share history in common.”

“We don’t need another damn Water Hashira,” Sanemi all but snarled. “We need you.”

Sanemi stopped himself from going on, closing his eyes as he tried to calm down. He could feel himself getting more and more heated, and he knew Giyu was getting to that point too. He couldn’t let this become another pointless argument. 

He finally let out a deep breath before he looked back up at his lover. “Giyu, I wouldn’t have blown a fuse or some shit if you had just talked to me. If you had explained the situation, like you explained it for Kamado,” he said, his voice softer. “Relationships are built on trust. It doesn’t excuse my attitude towards everything, but can you understand why I was so pissed?”

Giyu’s gaze softened. He could tell Sanemi was truly trying to make things right between them. It was only fair he did the same.

“I do now,” he said softly. “I was wrong to keep this from you. I should have trusted you to understand. I’m sorry, Sanemi.”

The Wind Hashira sighed. Giyu was still acting tense, his words almost clipped. He moved forward, and took his lover’s hands in his. 

“Stop acting like that,” he said firmly, but not unkindly.

“Like what?” Giyu asked, puzzled.

“Like we don’t have anything between us. Like we’re just comrades and nothing more. Giyu, you’re mine and I’m yours, and you can’t change that. No stoic act is going to chase me away anymore” Sanemi said, his words soft, but his passion obvious. “I love you, and that’s never gonna change.”

Giyu sighed and gently squeezed Sanemi’s hands. “ I was just worried we’d both end up doing something we’d regret, something that would result in the others discovering everything.”

“I get it,” Sanemi nodded. “But stop it nonetheless. I want you back. I promise I won’t push public shit anymore. I’ll keep all our  moments behind closed and locked doors. So please, come back?” he whispered desperately. 

Giyu’s breathing hitched at how desperate Sanemi sounded. Had his absence truly left such a scar on his lover? Without thinking, he pulled him into a hug.

“I’m so sorry,” he whispered. “I’m here now. I’ll never leave you again.”

Sanemi closed his eyes, a weight falling off his shoulders as soon as Giyu pulled him into his arms. The two stood there hugging for a second longer before letting go. Thankfully, no one passed by during their time of resolvement. Sanemi stepped back a little more, holding onto his word to keep their moments behind closed doors. Giyu, however, moved forward. He captured Sanemi’s lips in a passionate, long-awaited kiss. His hands traveled to his Zephyr’s hips, holding Sanemi in place. 

Sanemi’s breathing hitched in surprise at the impulsive move, but he reacted quickly and wrapped his arms around Giyu’s neck. He groaned faintly as Giyu pushed closed, forcing Sanemi slightly into a dip position. However, the moment was ruined entirely when someone gasped. Snapping their heads in the direction of the noise, the two were met with the sight of a wide-eyed Tanjiro Kamado. 

Giyu held an arm out towards the boy. “Tanjiro, wait-”

His plea was cut short by the boy turning and dashing back down the dirt path.

Chapter Text

Sanemi was off in an instant after the boy. He was beyond pissed Tanjiro had interrupted then, but he was even more pissed that the kid had the audacity to look at them like that. Dumb brat was carrying a demon on his back like a pet. He couldn’t say anything about them being the freaks here. Luckily, he had the speed advantage, and was quick to tackle the brat into the dirt. Said brat let out a startled yelp as they crashed. Sanemi kept his hold firm though as he shoved Tanjiro onto the ground as a warning not to struggle. 

“Where the hell do you think you’re going?” he snapped.

Tanjiro looked downright afraid as he began to struggle. “Get off me, you...you monstrosity!”

Sanemi’s eyes widened. Sure, he wasn’t fond of the kid, but that didn’t mean he hadn’t heard stories of him. Tanjiro was known for his bright personality, and acceptance of others, even demons. Yet, he was calling them monsters. How the hell were they the monsters when all they did was love one another? He growled, pissed off even more.

"Wanna repeat that?” he dared. 

Giyu caught up to them and put his hand on Sanemi’s arm. “Let him go,” he said firmly.

Sanemi looked at his lover incredulously. He knew Giyu had a soft spot for the brat, but Tanjiro could jeopardize them and Genya. However, he trusted  his Rivulet enough, and slowly got off the brat. Immediately, Tanjiro tried to make a run for it, but Giyu gently caught his wrist. 

“Tanjiro, wait,” he said, firmly, but not unkindly. 

“Let go of me, Tomioka-san!” Tanjiro struggled, yanking on his arm to try and free it from the hashira’s tight grip. 

Giyu almost rolled his eyes at the boy’s effort before he yanked him back. Then he put his hands on Tanjiro’s shoulders, forcing the boy to look at him, and to still.

“Tanjiro, look at me. Do you truly think me and Sanemi are monsters? You never expressed ill will towards anyone, not even demons. What makes me so much more disgusting than them?” he asked calmly.

“I- you lay with another man at night, you kiss another man,” he said as if it were obvious “You love another man, Tomioka-san.”

“So what?” Giyu asked. “So what if I do? Does that make me less human than you or the screaming boys you travel with so often? Are they more human than me simply because they’re deemed normal? What about Nezuko? Is she more human than me?” he pushed.

“I guess so?” Tanjiro answered with uncertainty, but his struggles began to cease.

“You guess so?” Giyu repeated, raising an eyebrow.

"I grew up being told people like you are wrong,” Tanjiro explained. “Whenever people like you were brought up, none of what was said was good things. Even other corps members and kakushi whisper things about people like you. They say they should be sent somewhere to atone for sins, and some go as far as saying they should be hunted down.”

Giyu hummed in acknowledgement, well aware of what society fed the youth. “Is that what you believe?”

When Tanjiro didn’t immediately reply, Giyu knelt down and looked up into the eyes of the torn boy. “Tanjiro, I promise you I’m the same person who found you in the woods and sent you to Urokodaki. I’m the same person who led you to become a Demon Slayer and broke the rules protecting Nezuko from Shinobu. I’m the same person who swore to commit seppuku if Nezuko should ever eat a human.”

Tanjiro looked down. Giyu removed his hands from the boy’s shoulder, allowing him to leave again if he chose to. This decision was one only Tanjiro could make. Suddenly, he felt arms around his neck and a face buried in his chest. 

“I don’t hate you Tomioka-san,” Tanjiro cried. “I promise I don’t. I’m sorry I ran. I was shocked, and so confused. I didn’t know what else to do.”

Giyu smiled softly, letting out a breath of relief before he wrapped his arms around the boy in return. “I understand. Many of the youth today would have done the same thing, but very few would have heard me out. That’s what sets you apart. You're willing to listen and change. The world would be a happier place if more people were like you, Tanjiro.”

Sanemi, who had been watching, smiled softly. Of course the brat wouldn’t be like everyone else. However, he knew Tanjiro wouldn’t have listened to him. In the end, Giyu and Tanjiro were a lot like Sanemi and Genya. They were family. He walked forward and placed a hand on top of the kid’s head, ruffling Tanjiro’s hair.

“So you won’t be running and blabbing your mouth to everyone?” he asked with a smirk.

Tanjiro shook his head almost too earnestly. “I won't,” he swore.

"Good,” Sanemi nodded. “Because Giyu isn’t the only one close to you who would suffer if you told people.”

The boy seemed confused before he understood the implication. “You’d be taken from Genya.” 

Sanemi nodded simply.

Tanjiro thought for another moment. “I….Is Genya like you?” he asked tentatively.

The protective side of Sanemi almost got defensive before he reminded himself that the kid wasn’t like the others. “He is,” he said simply. 

“Then I’ll keep him safe too, Shinazugawa-san” Tanjiro said with sudden determination “Genya’s my friend.”

The Wind Hashira chuckled. It was a little sad since he knew how much his brother wanted them to be more than just friends. However, he was thankful either way that someone would be watching out for Genya. 

“Thanks, Tanjiro. It’s nice knowing Genya’s got a friend like you watching his back,” Sanemi finally said.

After a few more questions, the young boy turned to leave them alone. Maybe he wasn’t as bad as Sanemi initially thought. The kid took him by surprise when he first heard of him. A demon slayer traveling with a demon. It pissed him off to no end. Hell, he was ready to kill Tanjiro that day. However, after a while he saw where Tanjiro had been coming from. He’d do the same for Genya if he had been turned into a demon. The Kamados were like mini Shinazugawa siblings, which was a little weird. 

Sanemi turned to his lover with a playful smirk. “Your brat’s a handful.”

Giyu glared back lightly. “He is not,” he argued.

Sanemi chuckled and pinched Giyu’s cheek playfully. “Okay, fine. He’s not a handful. He’s definitely different though.”

“He is,” Giyu agreed and watched Tanjiro disappear around a corner, “but he’s a good different.”

Sanemi laced their hands together after a quick glance around them. “We are too.”

“We are,” Tomioka agreed as he lifted his lover’s hand and kissed the back of it

Sanemi pretended that his face didn’t flush a bright red after, and Giyu pretended his heart still didn’t flutter at the sight of his Zephyr blushing.