Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

It was a bitter cold January. It was snowing, sharp, and icy snow that made the roads slippery, and it cut into skin. Aaron tried to move his hoodie over his eyes to protect them and his cheeks. He was freezing and cursed as he tried to get his fingers to work. He needed to get the truck he was scraping ready for the crusher — he had to keep ahead and not fall behind. He wanted to leave early because he knew Robert was planning something for Aaron's birthday...

Which wasn't until the weekend. But the Dingles monopolized his time on the day. His mother wouldn't budge on that, though. Robert had tried their second year together — and possibly set back his relationship with Aaron's mother another billion steps. But he'd told Aaron he was worth it, even if he'd lost the battle. All it'd meant was that Robert decided he had all the other days. A week of them, all for Aaron. And this year his birthday was on a Friday, and Robert mentioned a few things about how amazing weekends were.

Aaron grinned a bit at that, wondering where Robert might take him — or better yet, he hoped maybe he'd lock them up in the Mill. He loved being locked away in their home together where they could forget the rest of the world existed, and it was just them.

His mum thought they were too joined at the hip, but Aaron didn't feel that way at all. They both worked hard hours, now that Robert found a job he enjoyed. He tutored at a continuing education center. He'd been there going on two years now. People of all ages, parents brought in kids, and older folks hired him for help as they re-entered the world of education. He got joy from it, and it gave him the time to work on his writing. Which he did by locking himself up in his writing room, door closed — sometimes locked if he was really concentrating. He was in courses, he had groups, he'd been published in quite a few magazines, and two of his short stories had won pretty prestigious awards.

He was working on a book.

Aaron knew he'd be amazing.

"Shit, stop it," Adam's voice pulled him from his thoughts.

"What?"

"You've got that Robert face."

Aaron scowled.

Adam just shook his head. "So, what is it, he taking you to Ibiza for the weekend or what?"

"He hates Ibiza," Aaron said. "I don't know, just know what I'm hoping for…either way, I'll like it."

"How can you be so sure?"

Aaron shrugged, his cheeks heating because he wasn't about to tell Adam all he needed was Robert was himself. It was soft, soppy even, and maybe his best mate did know that about him. But saying it. Sometimes he got overwhelmed still, and he ducked his head down and went back to work.

"Your mum was asking me, is all."

"Asking you what?" Aaron looked up.

"If he was planning on whisking you away this weekend."

Aaron frowned.

"Dingle do is Friday, right?"

"Yeah, Wishing Well like always… what was she asking exactly?"

"If I knew what Robert was planning for ya if it was going out of town."

Aaron's frown deepened.

"Think she's trying to upstage him?"

He rolled his eyes.

"I mean, last year they had that battle about the day of…."

"Which is why he's been doing stuff all week…." Aaron mumbled.

"All week…maaate. Don't ever tell Vic he does that."

Aaron snorted. "She helped him with last night's, so, too late, mate."

"What?"

"He borrowed her crepe pan…breakfast in bed."

"That why you were too full for lunch?"

Aaron nodded. "Had leftovers this morning, whatever he's planning today is tonight…which I want to be able to leave early, so…."

"Ugh…" Adam muttered, but he tucked into the work, and they fell into a comfortable silence. Which meant Aaron's mind wandered to what his mother was up to… He really didn't want any drama. She'd promised to try harder — again — when it came to Robert. Except for the birthday battle, Robert had been doing his bloody damnest to keep on her good side. To try to get along with her, charm her…

He walked into that wall for Aaron. Over and over.

He thought the least his mum could do was not be a wall.

"She'll come around," Adam said after a bit.

Aaron couldn't stop the snort that left his nose. "Doubt it, she says she will, says she'll do it for me, but she can't seem to get past whatever it is..."

"I mean, he's not exactly Mr. Nice."

Aaron shrugged. "And my lot are? I am?"

"Well, Nah, but…you're her family."

"He's mine," Aaron said.

Adam nodded. "I'll try to nudge her. I came around on him, yeah?"

Aaron nodded.

"And honestly, you two are godsends with Julie, somedays."

"She over her sniffles?"

"Almost, she's milking it now, keeps asking for ice cream. Pretty sure her sore throat is gone."

"That'd be Robert's fault."
"Where does he get that ice cream, anyway?"

"Top secret, mate."

"It's unfair, you know, and Vic doesn't…."

"Sarah says otherwise, but I think she didn't like sharing it at first…." Aaron laughed.

Adam cackled.

"Anyways, we keep taking Julie there. She'll tell Vic the name of the place someday."

"Oh yeah, just six years or so, and the mystery is over."

Aaron grinned.

Adam stopped working.

"What?"

"You see it then?"

"See what?"

"You and him, six years down the road?"

Fear laced through him but not the kind that made him want to run, the kind of that made him feel alive. Made him notice that the snow looked pretty when it swirled. That it wasn't just icy and sharp, it was beautiful too —- he wouldn't have noticed it without Robert. He knew that. He made him see silly details like that, dumb things really — he made him laugh at dumb things. And made him feel lighter and less afraid. It was a fear he needed in his life. It was the fear of not having Robert in five years…

"Four years," he said out loud.

Adam stared at him blankly. "You only see four more years?"

"No, you muppet. It's four years this month that we've been together."

"What? No, really, that long?"

It felt like nothing. It felt like they'd just met that night in Bar West. Somedays, he felt like he was still falling in love, terrified about how much Robert meant to him. How important he'd become in such a short space of time — and now it'd been years. And it felt like longer, and it felt too short. He wanted forever. He'd known that for a long time. He'd known that when Robert'd grabbed his hand if he was honest. He'd known when Robert tugged him in for their first kiss…

He'd known if he said yes, his world would change. And he'd been sure if he said no, he'd be making a mistake.

"Not long enough," Aaron told Adam.

~~~

Robert was kneading pasta dough when he heard the door open, and he sighed. "What are you doing home already?"

"Wanted to be," Aaron's voice is amused.

"I'm not ready for ya…." Robert turned and sighed. He was covered in flour and sauce, he had his glasses, and there were spots of tomato on them. His hair was probably a mess, and he was in shorts, one of Aaron's old ratty t-shirts, and his TARDIS apron. "I'm a mess. The place is a mess…."

But Aaron was beaming at him.

"What?"

"Nothing, just your cooking, for me. I like it."

"I do it all the time…" Robert muttered. "I'm trying something new here. I need…"

"I'll go upstairs, alright. I'm chilled to the bone. I need a long hot shower."

"Oh, so now you'll be naked and went upstairs, and I'm meant to concentrate?"

Aaron blushed, and Robert felt a rush; he could still do it, cause those perfect cheeks to go bright red. He dropped the dough on the table, took off his glasses, and dropped them in a pile of flour.

"Hey, I like those on…." Aaron said, but Robert swallowed the rest.

Aaron's hands were on his biceps in seconds.

Robert shivered, both at contact and at how cold Aaron's lips felt. "You are freezing," he mumbled, breaking away for a second.

"Hmm.." Aaron was pushing at him.

"What're you…."

"Join me."

"But dinner…"

"After. I'll help ya, I like helping ya…."

"You mean watching…." Robert laughed but turned to walk up the stairs, Aaron's hands sliding to his waist. He was pulling at Aaron's coat as he felt his apron fly off and drop to the floor. He grabbed Aaron's face and kissed him again, laughing at how cold his face was. "Is it still snowing?"

"Icy, car kept slipping on the ice."

"You said you'd get the tires changed."

"I will."

"I don't want you in another…."

"Rob, stop fussing."

Robert pulled Aaron's shirt off and reached behind him. The shower switched on. "Never when it comes to you."

Aaron grinned, grabbed him, and they were both under the hot spray and laughing because they were both half-dressed. But they changed that quickly, and Robert kissed Aaron soundly, pushing him against the wall and stopping him when he tried to drop to his knees. "No, this is your night…."

Aaron bit his lip.

Robert kneeled down, hands on Aaron's chest, tweaking his nipples, falling to his stomach, and staring up. "Beautiful."

"Shut up."

"Beautiful…" he whispered again as he wrapped his hand around Aaron's cock. "Fucking gorgeous."

Aaron groaned and leaned his head back.

Robert wrapped his mouth around him, moaning at the taste of Aaron. He would get drunk on it. On him. He grabbed his arse as he swallowed him down, and Aaron growled his name, hands falling into his hair, and Robert closed his eyes and fell into the perfect pace, the one he knew would have Aaron begging and reminded himself that he was going to ask Aaron to marry him…

~~~

Sarah opened her eyes to her ceiling. For the billionth time that night. She just couldn't sleep. She sighed and pushed off her quilt and really wished she hadn't as colder air hit it. The farmhouse was creaky and never stayed quite warm enough. But she hugged herself, hopped out, and grabbed her fluffiest robe from the closet.

She went downstairs and into her kitchen. Opened the cabinet over the refrigerator and found an old bottle of whiskey. She poured herself a generous glass of it and hoped it would help her with falling asleep. She thought it was the wind from the never-ending snowstorm outside.

On cue, she heard the wind whistle and sound of ice hitting her windows. She shook her head and walked to the living room. She flicked on her television. She'd find something to stream — she'd read all the books she'd gotten out of the library already. She really needed to find some new recommendations. She sat down in her favorite rocker, sipped the whiskey, and stared at the television. What should she stream? She'd promised Robert she'd watch The Falcon and Winter Solider with him…

Why had she done that?

Well, what would he know if she peeked ahead?

She was about to open Disney Plus when the newscaster on the channel the tv was tuned to said a name she knew…

She blinked.

She turned up.

"Yes, we have an update on the tragic five-car pile-up that happened on Hotten Road on the outskirts of Hotten, toward Skipdale earlier today…. It appears that not only Lawrence White has died but both his daughters, as well as his grandson Lachlan White. Their car caused the accident when it suddenly swerved right in front of a lorry… Investigators are unsure if it was due to the storm…."

Sarah turned off the television. She felt stunned. She'd met that man's daughters. Both just once. She hadn't liked either of them. She shook her head at that thought — that was awful to think now. They were dead, far too young. The youngest was only Victoria's age, wasn't she? The grandson, much only have been a teenager, and now he was gone.

"What a tragedy."

Chapter Text

Soft lips, the hard grip of hands on his hips, and the press of Robert against his arse woke him, from what he could tell the crack of dawn. He moaned both from arousal and grouchiness. "It's early..." But he pushed his arse back against Robert, creating more friction.

"It's your birthday, what do you want..." Robert kissed his ear as he spoke, his hand wrapping around Aaron's cock.

That felt like a present.

"Anything...as long as we can fall back asleep after."

Robert laughed in his ear as he stroked him. "Anything?"

Aaron sighed and leaned back, going in for an awkward angled kiss. It was perfect all the same, and suddenly he was under Robert. Staring in his blue-green eyes and swallowing the lump of emotion that appeared in his throat. Robert staring down at him with pure softness and the kind of love that still awed Aaron. Still scared him.

It was addictive.

"God, I love you," Robert breathed.

Aaron nodded his agreement.

Robert smirked and bent down, kissing his mouth, but briefly before he made his way slowly down Aaron's body -- mapping his chest with this mouth first, teasing his nipples, tickling his ribs...

"Rob..." He laughed.

All it got him was licked, and then his hip bone was under Robert's mouth, and his hand was curled around him again. And Aaron forced his closed eyes open and look down the length of himself and watch Robert take his cock into his mouth...

It was downright beautiful.

And it felt even better.

Then he felt a lubed finger slide into him, and he made a sound straight from his gut. "When did ya..."

Robert let his cock slip out his mouth and smirked. "It's your birthday. I'm prepared."

"Get on with it..." Aaron ordered his hand in Robert's hair.

Robert obeyed.

Aaron watched it until really the pleasure made him unable. He sunk down into the mattress until he felt his legs lifted up, then he grabbed onto Robert, meeting his eyes again, wrapped himself around him, and muttered soppy, grateful words as Robert sunk into him.

"Shit..." Robert paused, their foreheads bumping. "Fuck."

Aaron stroked his back and begged him to move.

Then it was nothing but stars.

~~~

"Rob..."

"Hmm..."

Aaron's mouth was on his neck. "You're gonna be late for work."

"Your mouth there will just make me later," Robert laughed as his eyes opened to see Aaron's blushing face. He ran his hand onto his cheek, feeling the scruff, and grinned. "Happy Birthday."

"Already said."

"Bears repeating...I'm going to be late for your party."

Aaron frowned.

"Don't look at me like that..."

"Just was hoping you'd be a buffer."

"Yeah...but I have writing group and an errand, but look at this way, I show up, and I can get you right out."

"Escape plan?"

Robert nodded.

Aaron smiled. "Alright yeah, I'll use Adam as my buffer."

"Or better yet, Julie," Robert grinned.

"I'm not using a kid."

"Why not? Your mum even would feel guilty pulling your attention away from her. Plus, Julie loves ya."

Aaron laughed.

"I better get ready."

Aaron nodded.

"Gonna lie in?"

"You wore me out, yeah," Aaron grinned and winked.

Robert smirked. "Wait until tonight."

"That promise."

"More like a threat."

Aaron flushed red, but he was smiling.

Robert tore his eyes and took a deep breath -- today, he got the rings. He just hoped they'd come outright. He looked down at his hand, and he glanced back at Aaron, who'd curled onto Robert's side of the bed and felt a bit more steady. He was sure he was dead set on it. But the idea of asking Aaron to marry him was daunting...

He inhaled and hurried into the shower.

He got dressed and went downstairs, found his phone charging on the kitchen table, and picked it up. A standard check for messages, though he was expecting none. Instead, he had ten.

"That's excessive," he thought as he opened them. Four texts were from his mum and Vic. His mum's said to call her, quickly. And it looked like he had two voice mail messages from a number he did not recognize. He frowned at that but called his mum as he made his way to his car...

The blast of cold air that hit as he walked out of the Mill was instantly chilling. He swore, hurried into his car, and started it to get warmed up. Then his mum's voice was in his ear.

"Robert?"

"What is it?"

"Have you seen the news, the paper?"

"Haven't had a chance, overslept, off to the learning center..."

Sarah made a weird noise.

"Alright, mum, you're scaring me."

"It's the Whites."

"The who?"

"Chrissie and Rebecca."

"Uh...what about them?" he shook his head. He hadn't thought about either of them in ages. He didn't want to, for a lot of reasons. One being it wasn't a time of his life he looked back on well.

"They're dead."

He shook his head. "What?"

"There was a lorry pileup yesterday. Apparently, their car caused it... They're dead. The whole family. I just... You knew them, Robert."

He sat back, memories of both Chrissie and Rebecca hitting him -- he shook his head, trying to wrap his brain around it all. "Chrissie's son?"

"And the father."

He swore.

"I just wanted to tell you."

"Yeah, I, uh..." He frowned. "I don't know what to do with it, mum."

"That doesn't surprise me. I'm here."

He nodded.

He looked at the Mill and thought about going in and talking to Aaron. But he noticed the time on his car's clock. He was going to be late for his first tutoring session. So he started the car and drove...

Memories hitting him. The last time he'd seen Chrissie had been the party at his sister's place, where he'd blown her off to sleep with Aaron. They'd broken up that night, not they'd really been together. He frowned. He'd seen Rebecca after that... Once. She'd called drunk and wanted to get together. He had nothing else on...and been ignoring that he wanted to call Aaron.

It'd just been a night.

It wasn't long after that he'd admitted all he could think about was Aaron.

She'd called a few times, now that he thought about it. But he'd ghosted her, hadn't he?

He shook his head, realized he'd gotten to work, and pulled into his parking space. As he was getting out of the car, his phone rang -- that odd number again. He hadn't listened to the voicemails...

But he was late, so he let it go to voicemail again.

~~~

The cafe was busy. Aaron was pretty sure it was due to the cold. He ordered himself a hot chocolate and bought a few biscuits, and found a seat. He looked around and grabbed the newspaper just for something to do that kept him off his phone...

His mum's texts about his party were annoying.

He just wanted to show up, put up with it and leave.

Why did he need to discuss it?

Especially when really he wanted no fuss at all.

But his phone was shoved in his back pocket, and it was on-off. At least for a while. He settled the paper in his hands and looked at the front. And frowned at the headline: Local Business Man Lawrence White and Family Die in Horrific Car Crash. He stared at it. White. White? It sounded familiar. Hadn't Robert spoken about this man before? Or... Wait, it was his daughters, wasn't it? Some of his horror stories from his past dating life...

Things he whispered to Aaron in the dark he felt guilty about, that he hated the person he was, that he was afraid he wasn't good enough... Aaron frowned and started to read the story. Shaking his head as he did, the car swerved right into the oncoming lorry, causing a pileup. It was probably a miracle that the Whites were the only casualties.

"Shit."

He yanked out his phone.

There were no messages from Robert, but... He called him.

It went to voicemail.

"Rob...uh. I just saw the paper about the Whites? Um, just call me back. If you don't know, I don't want...call me back."

He hung up and bit his lip, stared at the photos of the family.

"Sad isn't it," Sarah's voice made him lookup.

"Yeah, um, Robert..."

"I told him. Not sure he knew what to do with it."

Aaron nodded.

"I know he's not happy about how he treated them."

Aaron nodded again.

"I'm so happy he found you," Sarah smiled.

Aaron blushed.

Sarah pushed a present on the table between them. "Happy Birthday."

He shook his head. "You didn't hafta..."

"Of course I did. You're family, always have been."

He nodded and opened it. It was a simple but very soft hoodie. He grinned. "Thanks."

She smiled. "Just keep making my boy happy."

"I'll try," Aaron said.

"I know," she got up and kissed his cheek.

He looked at his phone, realized the ringer was still off, and sighed. He turned it on. He just erased all his mum's texts, then groaned when a call came in. He rolled his eyes. He finished his hot chocolate, though it'd gone cold, and ate his biscuits...

He was about to head back home to change in his new hoodie when Robert' called.

"Hey...Mum told me."

"I ran into her, she mentioned. You alright?"

"Don't know...it's weird, innit?"

"Yeah, sad, though."

"Yeah... I just, I was awful to them, Aaron."

"From what you told me, they weren't great..."

"Chrissie, yeah... Bex was...." Robert sighed. "It's weird. I mean, they're all dead. Lachlan was...odd, kind of creepy, really, but he wasn't even twenty yet, I think."

"Shit."

"I don't know what to with it."

"Maybe nothing?" Aaron said. "Just whatever you feel you feel... I'm here?"

"I know." Aaron could hear his smile.

"Your mum driving you nuts?"

"Been ignoring her so far...doubt it last longer."

Robert chuckled. "Yeah, well, I promise the minute I make it to Wishing Well is also the minute we leave."

"I love ya."

"Love ya more...my next session is here, I gotta..."

"Bye."

Aaron grinned as he hung up. He was lucky.

~~~

Robert let out a breath when his last student of the day left the small classroom he used. He looked at the time and realized he would be cutting it close to picking up the rings. He inhaled again, but it was anticipation more than anything. Once he had them in his hands, it was only a few steps more before he was sliding one of the rings onto Aaron's finger...

He wanted it.

He could taste it.

He started to pack up his things and cursed the weather for making a few of his clients late. He was about to leave the room when the weird number called him again. He still hadn't gotten to the messages they'd been leaving -- and there were more of them. He sighed...

His phone rang.

He realized they'd just keep calling if he didn't answer. He needed to deal with whatever it was so he could focus on Aaron and how he was going to propose...

"Hello?"

"Robert Sugden?" A woman's voice asked.

"Yes."

"Oh, Hello. Have you gotten my messages?"

"Honestly, haven't had the time to listen...and I am in a hurry."

"Well, this is concerning Rebecca White. It's rather important."

"Rebecca?"

"Have you seen the news?" the woman asked.

"Yeah."

"And you did know her, Miss Rebecca White?"

"Yeah..." He shook his head, confused. "I doubt she left me anything."

"Well, my name is Hilaire Dempsey. I'm the lawyer in charge of the White Estate and well...I really do not know how to say this, there is a letter she wrote in case of an emergency such as this... Could you come to my office? I do think this is a conversation we should have face to face, Mr. Sudgen."

"I don't...have time, could you just tell me?" he asked, completely baffled and confused. Rebecca had written him a letter?

"It's about her son, Mr. Sugden."

"Bex had a son?"

"Sebastian, yes....Mr. Sugden, I have to inform you that he is your son."

Chapter Text

"Oh, Hello. Have you gotten my messages?"

"Honestly, haven't had the time to listen...and I am in a hurry."

"Well, this is concerning Rebecca White. It's rather important."

"Rebecca?"

"Have you seen the news?" the woman asked.

"Yeah."

"And you did know her, Miss Rebecca White?"

"Yeah..." He shook his head, confused. "I doubt she left me anything."

"Well, my name is Hilaire Dempsey. I'm the lawyer in charge of the White Estate and well...I really do not know how to say this, there is a letter she wrote in case of an emergency such as this... Could you come to my office? I do think this is a conversation we should have face to face, Mr. Sugden."

"I don't...have time, could you just tell me?" he asked, completely baffled and confused. Rebecca had written him a letter?

"It's about her son, Mr. Sugden."

"Bex had a son?"

"Sebastian, yes....Mr. Sugden, I have to inform you that he is your son."

He laughed hard. It was a bark of absurdity, and he shook his head. He started to walk, to head for his car. This was ridiculous. "I really don't have time for a joke…."

"This isn't a joke, Mr. Sugden…."

"Obviously it is, look…."

"Mr. Sugden," Ms. Dempsey raised her voice. "Miss White's instructions are clear, you are to be informed, and she hoped she would take him on — especially after the incident. To be honest, she planned to call you, but…."

"Incident?"

"With her nephew…this would be better explained face to face. I'm using Mr. White's offices at the moment — Sebastian is here. Social services have allowed him to stay with a nanny, for the time being, given that Miss White's instructions and wishes are clear. They are all just reliant on you, some interviews and of course a DNA test just be sure…."

He stopped walking.

He stopped breathing.

His mind doing mental mathematics. "How…old is he?"

"He turned three this past November. The 9th."

Julie was about to turn three.

He shook his head. "I… I can't have a son."

"I know it's a shock. Will you stop by…."

He shut his eyes.

"Mr. Sugden?"

"His offices… on Woodbridge, the house?"

"Yes."

"Yeah…um, also expect my mother, Sarah Sugden."

"Of course, I'll see you soon."

He blinked as the phone disconnected.

He stood by his car.

He felt like he was on quicksand. He hurriedly opened the door and sat down, and gripped the steering wheel. It was a mistake. It was a huge mistake. It'd be just…

He grabbed at his phone and called his mother. He felt like a child. But he felt lost. This was not a situation — a kid? Bex? It had to be a mistake. It was a joke. He laughed again, but as he listened to the phone rang, he prayed she'd answer before it went to voice mail.

"Robert?"

"Mum…" his voice came out strangled.

"Sweetheart, what is it?"

"Um…" he swallowed hard. "I've had a phone call."
"Alright, has something happened?"

"It was Rebecca's lawyer."

"That's strange."

"They've told me…" another laugh, but he heard it was quacky and a bit strangled.

"Robert, you're worrying me."

"It… theytoldmeIhaveasonandwillyoumeetmeattheoofficeIlltextyoutheaddress…" he spat out in one long breath.

"Sweetheart, that wasn't English."

He inhaled. "I'm texting it."

"Alright."

He took a deep breath, hung up, and wrote a quick text. All the information, and then before he didn't do it. He started his car and drove to Lawrence White's house…

Every now and again laughing like he'd gone mad.

~~~

"Mum, is he alright? Is it about the White's dying?" Vic asked from her kitchen.

Sarah wasn't sure how to answer that… "I'm not quite sure. He didn't sound right at all…he was talking in tongues."

"Ok, that's worrying."

"Quite…" Sarah jumped when the text came through, a part of her afraid it wouldn't. "Here is his text. Let's see if it…."

Been told I have a son. Please meet me at the following address.

She gasped.

"What?"

Sarah pressed the phone to her chest. "It's… I need to go. I need to go."

"Mum!" Vic followed her as she grabbed her things and headed for the door.

"Vic, he's fine. It'll be fine. It's fine."

"I'm getting it's not fine."

"I will take care of it. It's going to be… I'll text you."

"Mum…"

"Vic, he… needs the support. I have to go."

"But…"

"And don't tell Aaron any of this," Sarah said suddenly. "Not a word. Alright…"

Vic's eyes widened.

"Promise."

"Alright."

"Ok… I just need to sort some things," she muttered as she walked out of the door, then she ran as fast as she could manage to her car, happy the sun melted the ice that'd been on the streets. She put the address into her car navigation and took off speeding.

~~~

He got there too fast.

Robert parked so he could see as his mother arrived.

He stayed in the car.

He stared at the building.

It felt a lifetime ago he'd once been envious. Not it looked stodgy and pretentious and not like a home at all. He clenched his jaw and tried to picture a kid living there — he couldn't even get that far. How could he? How could he…

He'd ignored her.

Basically ghosted her.

When had she made all those calls?

He cursed his memory. He cursed his brain for its ability to math.

November 9th….

February.

Right before his world became Aaron.

Shit. Aaron.

The rings.

He cursed and dialed the jeweler. Anger rushing him. He should be there right now — right now. He cursed again but then put on a happy tone when the phone was answered. "Uh, yeah, I'm supposed to pick up some rings today, and I can't make it."

"Your name."

"Robert Sugden."

"Yes, two male wedding bands?"

"Yeah…" he smiled a bit.

"When will you be able to pick them up."

"Sebastian, yes....Mr. Sugden, I have to inform you that he is your son."

"I don't know… had some sudden news."

"Not bad, I hope."

"No…" he startled himself.

"We could mail them to you."

"No, I don't want to risk…Um, I'll try to pick them Tuesday?"

"Alright, that's fine."

He hung up.

No. It's not bad news.

His heart thumped.

He swallowed.

He opened his phone again and pulled up Aaron. His face staring at him and called him. His mind spinning about what to say — what to do? He had nothing, he nothing, and he breathed out in relief when it went to his voicemail…

He glanced at the time.

"Hope your mum isn't driving you too mad…" he winced, his voice sounded all wrong. "Uh, somethings come up, and I wouldn't… I'm going to be late. I don't know when I'll be home. Something's happened… I can't tell you on the phone. I can't even tell myself at the moment…shit. I'm sorry for this…I'm really sorry. Please don't worry. Um, I'll be with my mum… I love you."

He hung up.

And let out a sigh of relief as he saw his mum driving towards him.

He got out of the car and helped her out of the car.

She gripped his hands. "Look at me."

He met her eyes.

"Breathe."

He breathed.

"What do you know?"

"Nothing."

"Robert? What did the lawyer tell you?"

"That's he's my son, this Sebastian. He's three…he's mine? Rebecca wanted me to be informed. I think there was something about a letter, but the lawyer said there was an incident with Lachlan, and Bex meant to call me… It's all too surreal. It's not real…" he barked out a laugh. "It's a joke, right?"

Sarah hugged him. "Or, maybe I have a grandson. Let's go see."

He exhaled and inhaled over her shoulder.

"Come on."

He froze.

Sarah sighed and grabbed his hand.

"I…"

"Robert, we wouldn't be here if you didn't want to talk through that door."

He hated how she could see through him, sometimes.

He left her pull him forward.

His phone rang.

"That's Aaron."

Sarah shook her head. "Right now, you don't know enough to tell him anything."

Robert gulped and nodded. "What if he hates me."

"Aaron?"

Both. his brain supplied. He inhaled. "I…a kid. Mum."

"You can do this."

'Can I?"

"Yes."

"How do you know?"

"You're my son, Robert Jacob Sugden," she snapped and yanked at his arm. "Inside."

This time he walked forward, and they walked inside.

Chapter Text

He'd stopped listening to a lawyer. He heard his mother asking questions, but it was a buzz in his ears. He held the letter Rebecca had written him in his hands and stared at it. His name in the envelope in a neat scrawl. Her handwriting, he guessed, he wouldn't know it. He barely knew her. They used each other — he had a son?

He swallowed and stood up.

Walked away.

He heard the lawyer say Mr. Sugden, but his mother said something to her.

He stepped out of the office and walked. He ended up in a kitchen in the large house where he stood. He leaned against the counter and opened the letter.

Robert,

I hope you never read this, but I can't risk not making arrangements. I'm, frankly, terrified. Lachlan — he's dangerous, delusional, I swear he was going to kill me — if the nanny hadn't knocked on the door.

I'm getting ahead. I should have tried harder to tell you. I didn't, I thought I could do it on my own, but near the end of my pregnancy, I got afraid of that — so I called you. More than once. Until you left that message — you had someone. And I thought I couldn't spend your life…

Maybe I did want to do this on my own.

But I don't feel safe. Not around Lachlan, and unless I can get Chrissie and Dad to listen, I don't know what may happen. I just have this pit in my stomach. I have some things to figure out, then then I'm going call you again…

Hopefully, we can discuss this in person.

But if not. Yes, Sebastian is yours. There was no one else in the same time period. February, right after your broke up, Chrissie — I wanted to celebrate it, remember. That's awful. But it got me, Sebastian, and he's the best thing in my life, my whole life. He's an amazing little boy, bright, funny, sweet. I can't imagine a world without him.

And I'm terrified Lachlan might do something.

If the worst happens, please, please take in our son. He deserves a family. A parent. A real home.

Bex.

He reread and stalked back into Lawrence's office, where the lawyer sat behind the desk. His mum stood up as he barreled in. "Robert?"

"This letter, she says she's terrified of Lachlan. What does that mean?"

The lawyer paled. "Lachlan White was a very dangerous young man."

"What does that mean?" Sarah asked.

"This is confidential, but a friend of Lachlan's has come forward. Apparently, Lachlan's phone called him before the accident. The whole thing was recorded. The Whites were trying to get Lachlan into a psychiatry ward. He was violent, paranoid, delusional. To stop them, Lachlan took the wheel and ran the car into the lorry. Prior to this, Rebecca had a few altercations with him, one where he scared Sebastian…."

"He terrorized a child?"

"It was one incident as far as I know, but it was the second Rebecca had with him, and it prompted the change in her will. To make sure that Sebastian was placed with his father."

Robert shut his eyes.

"This is quite a lot…."

"I realize. Marnie from social service should be here soon. We can draw some blood for the DNA test — we all want to make sure, of course. Though her wishes are clear."

"I need…." Robert shoved the letter into his pocket and strode out.

"Robert," Sarah yelled after him this time.

"Air…" he shot back at her.

He kept walking, blindly, just into the house, further. He'd never really gotten past the kitchen the few times he'd been here with Chrissie. He ended up on a landing, really, and sat down on the stairs, head in his hands, and just tried to breathe. He didn't know what to do at all — he needed to talk with Aaron. God, Aaron…

How would he tell him? How would he…

I can't do this.

"Sebastian!" A voice yelled.

"I WANT MY MUMMY…." A smaller voice screamed.

Robert stood up and turned just in time to see him. This tiny little three old, holding a toy truck, his face wet with tears tumbling down the last stairs and meaning to keep going. He stopped short, seeing Robert though, and looked up at him.

"Do you know mummy is?"

His heart lurched. This tiny little kid, face wet with tears, skin red, probably from crying and Robert felt upended. He stared at him, took it all, strawberry blond hair that reminded him of Vic when she was a baby and blue-green eyes — his entire being screamed at him that he was his…

His.

And the world stopped.

It focused in and around only them.

And he felt this pull, this need…something he knew well. He knew it from loving Aaron, knowing Aaron, feeling drawn to him like he meant forever. He felt that here too, something bigger than himself. His throat went dry, he felt a little sick, but he dropped down to his knees and met the little boy's eyes.

"I'm Robert."

"Seb'asTEN."

"Can I call you Seb?"

He nodded.

Robert smiled.

"I want my mummy."

His heart broke. "What have they told you?"

He shook his head.

Robert heard footsteps and looked up to see a woman around his mother's age standing there.

"Who are you?"

"Uh, Robert Sugden."

Her eyes widened. "Oh, I see."

"I want MUM," the boy yelled at her.

"I know, sweetie, but she's not here right now…."

Robert frowned at that. "Shouldn't you tell him?"

She looked panicked at the thought.

"He's going to keep asking…."

He felt a hand tug at his pants.

He looked down.

"Where is she?"

He sighed and bent down. "She's somewhere special."

"Special?"

"Yeah…she had to go there, but she can't come back."

"Can I go there?"

"No."

Seb wiped at his eyes. "Are Gramp and Aunt Chrissie there too?"

He nodded.

"I don't like that place."

"It's nice for your mum."

"But she's stuck, and I can't see her."

"Yeah…I'm sorry."

Seb stared at him.

Robert wanted to hug him, it hit him with all he had, but he felt frozen in place, but then he had a little boy pressed against him, and he wrapped his arms around him.

"I just could never figure out what to say," the nanny quietly said.

He nodded. He wasn't at all sure he'd done the right thing.

He heard more footsteps.

"Robert, the woman from social service…." Sarah trailed off.

Robert stood up and found himself holding Sebastian. He shifted him a bit, the boy started to fiddle with his shirt buttons. "Hey, Mum. This is Sebastian, Seb."

Sarah stared at him, her eyes darting between them, then her face lit up. She smiled and met Sebastian's eyes. "Hi, I'm Sarah."

He buried his face in Robert's neck.

"He's usually shy with strangers. His reaction to Mr. Sugden was…

"He must know," Sarah said.

Robert rolled his eyes, and he had no words for how he felt. But he realized he didn't want to put the boy down. He felt protective, confused, and changed. He felt changed.

He knew for sure now.

He was a dad.
~~~

Aaron listened to Robert's voice message.

Again.

He frowned at his phone and called him back.

It went straight to voice mail.

"I'm worried. Call me," he barked into it. Again.

Adam appeared around the corner. "Your mum is looking for ya. You've been gone almost thirty minutes."

"Something's wrong."

"It's not that bad of a party," Adam laughed.

"No, it's Robert…."

"What?"

"He left his weird message…though. He said he was with Sarah…." Aaron called her number, and it went straight through to her message. He sighed. "Sarah, I'm worried…" he said in a softer tone.

"What did he say?"

"That's it, he left this rambling message, and it said nothing. He said he wasn't even if he'd be coming home?"

"What?"

"It's weird…." Aaron bit his lip.

"I'll call Vic. She should be here by now too…." Adam pulled out his phone and walked away a bit to make the call.

Aaron leaned against the hallway wall, where he was hiding, in Wishing Well. But suddenly his mum was there. She grinned at him. "You're missing the toast."

"You mean the tenth toast."

"Twentieth, but who is counting. This is your party. You should be out there."

"I really rather less fuss…."

"Still presents to open…seems like it's been a waste of time to wait for Robert."

"Mum."

"He can't be bothered to show to your birthday party…."

"He's been celebrating my birthday for the past week, Mum. I don't need him here…." I just want him here.

"Then why are you hiding and checking your phone?"

"He's left a weird message."

"Did he?"

"Yeah, it was weird, saying he can't make it."

"So, he's fed you a pack of lies."

Aaron rolled his eyes.

"Aaron, you can't trust him."

"Mum," he growled. "We've discussed this."

She shook her head.

"I'm leaving."

"Aaron, you can't leave. It's your party…."

"And I asked you to keep it low-key or not have it…." Aaron snapped. "I'm going home."

He heard his mother's sigh as he walked away.

He was halfway to his car when Adam called out.

He turned. "Did you find out anything?"

"Just that Robert called Sarah, sounding weird, then Sarah got all weird and took off. Vic decided to stay home because she's confused and a bit worried too…."

Aaron bit his lip and shook his head. He called Robert again. No answer.

"Rob, what the fuck is going on?" he shouted into the phone before getting in the car. Adam hopping in with him since Aaron was his ride — and well, Aaron saw the protective look his best friend had.

He appreciated it.

But only Robert could settle him now.

As they pulled into the Mill's driveway, his phone pinged.

He opened the text.

I'm at this address, can you come here?

He blinked at it.

"What is it? He alright?"

"It's some address. He wants me to go there."

"Ominous."

Aaron shrugged. "Get out."

Adam laughed but got out of the car. "Text will ya, for Vic."

He nodded and typed the address into his GPS. Then he answered the text.

Just tell me everything is ok.

I love you.

Aaron frowned at that because it wasn't the answer to his question.

Fine on my way.

I just this isn't a text thing, Aaron.

Alright. Is it bad?

No. But it is complicated. Just get here.

Aaron nodded to himself, sent Robert an ok, and started to drive.

Chapter Text

Aaron stared at the huge house he'd just parked in front of, fairly late at night, and doubled checked the address Robert sent him. It was right. He bit his lip and felt unsettled, to say the least. Confused, worried, and maybe getting a bit mad — mostly because he was confused and worried. He got out of the car and walked up the door, and rang the bell.

Sarah answered.

That was a relief.

"Aaron," she smiled and stepped back to let him in.

There were a few other people around, in suits, talking at each other more than with each other, and someone walked past him with a cooler in their hands.

"The test will be done by?" a woman yelled after the person.

"About a week, we're putting a rush on it."

Aaron stared at Sarah.

She gave him a soft smile, one that reminded him of Robert, and he looked around. "Where is he?" he asked.

"Go upstairs," she pointed. "Then it's the fifth door on the right."

Aaron stared at her.

"Just go up, Aaron."

"Sarah, what's going on?"

"It's best you just go up."

Aaron frowned, turned, and walked up the stairs. Finally reaching the top, he turned right and counted the doors. It was half-open, so he peeked in, wary for some reason, curious, unsure, and he thought he heard Robert's voice, but it was so low he wasn't quite sure…

So he peered behind the door.

And saw Robert sitting on the edge of a kids bed, a book in his hands, softly reading a story to a little kid — about Julie's age — who was staring up at Robert with wide eyes.

"Rob…" he said, too quietly, somehow not wanting to ruin the moment. He felt like he was being intrusive, and maybe he should step out. But that wasn't possible. First, he'd been invited, and second…

What the bloody hell was going on?

"Rob…" he said again.

Both Robert and the kid glanced toward him.

"Who is he?" the little boy asked.

"This is Aaron. He's the most important person in my life…besides you."

"I'm important?"

Robert nodded at him and glanced back at Aaron.

"Robert?"

"Seb, can you give us a minute?"

"I can stay up longer?" the little boy grinned.

Robert nodded.

"Ok."

He smiled at him, tugged at the bedding around the kid, and got up. He walked past Aaron into the hallway. Aaron followed, but he glanced back at the kid. Who had picked up the book and was flipping through the pages. Aaron felt…

"Robert?" he said again.

"Hi," Robert said softly, hands grabbing Aaron's as he met his eyes. "I'm sorry about the party."

Aaron shrugged. "I don't care about the party… what is this, who is that?"

Robert shook his head.

"Robert?"

"I'm trying to find words."

"Alright."

"This has really shook me, but…" he smiled, a smile Aaron knew. It was his deepest, truest smile. "I never saw this coming."

"Can you get with it," Aaron snapped?

"He's mine, Aaron. He's my son. His name is Sebastian, Seb."

Aaron stared at him.

"Take your time."

Take his time.

"What? How? When…" he stepped back, pulled his hands free, and looked in the room again… Really seeing the kid now. The hair, the eyes, the way he was looking at the book. He felt something swoop inside him. He felt terror and fear. "When?"

"February. Before we really got serious. With Bex."

Aaron swore under his breath. "Bex, Rebecca… who just died, Rebecca?"

Robert nodded.

"February?"

"After that party, remember, that intense…amazing…night in your old room."

"Adam's birthday, when I was dating James?"

"Yeah. Chrissie dumped me because I blew her off — she and Bex. I mean, they almost make me and Andy look healthy. Bex wanted to celebrate me being done with her sister…."

Aaron looked back in the room. "She never told ya?"

"I think she tried a few times. I blew her off because I was with you."

"Does he know?"

"No, not really. He likes me…." Robert chuckled. "Not sure why. I kind of told him about Bex. No one had."

Aaron frowned.

"She left him to me… she was, apparently planning on trying to tell me. It's crazy, but it was Lachlan, her nephew. He killed them all."

"What?"

"Yeah…and Seb's lost his whole world…" Robert's voice caught.

Aaron turned toward him, looked at him, and saw a lot of the fear he was feeling in Robert's eyes — but more. He nodded. "You love him."

"God, yeah," Robert smiled. "I didn't see it coming, but it only took one second."

Aaron frowned.

"Hey…" Robert grabbed his hands. "I…I'm sorry about Bex."

"What?"

"We weren't really together, but…."

"Robert…" Aaron rolled his eyes. "It's not that."

"It's him?"

"It's a… kid…he's what, Julie's age?"

"About three months older."

Aaron tried to wrap his head about it. All of it. What it all meant. What it meant for them? His heart started to pound.

"Wanna meet him?"

"Uh…"

"If you need more time," Robert said. "I get it. We bumped into each other by mistake. I don't think I ever would thought I was ready…."

Aaron inhaled sharply. "You're taken him in."

Robert grabbed his hands again and pulled him closer, and met his eyes. "I want to talk about it, yeah? But I do. I have to. He's mine, Aaron. I mean, there is some red tape, and they've taken blood for a DNA test. There is legal stuff, but Bex was clear. She wanted me to have him… But all of that is just, stuff, what you think matters the most…."

Aaron shook his head.

"What? You can't do this?"

"He's your son. I can't say no."

Robert closed his eyes.

Aaron frowned.

He felt stuck. He felt overwhelmed. He needed some time to deal with this — Robert was hours ahead of him, but it was also his son — HIS SON. Aaron felt the urge to run, to just run and not stop. He was about to step back and do that when he felt a tug on his pants leg.

He looked down.

Seb. Sebastian had both their pants in his hands. He was looking up at them.

"Hey, what is it?" Robert asked.

"I think I'm too tired to wait for more. Can you finish the story, Robber?"

Aaron stared at him.

"Your friend can listen since he's portant."

"Yeah, um, I will, but Aaron…."

"Can stay," Aaron said.

Their eyes met, and he saw Robert's relief at that — Robert wanted him here. Robert wanted him. He was important. He just felt outside of himself, though, and shocked. He was shocked.

They went back into the bedroom. Aaron took it all in. It was filled with enough toys and things to fill a store — rich people — he thought. He watched the little boy hold Robert's hand as they went to Seb's bed, and he climbed back in and handed him the book.

"Before I read, I want you to meet Aaron," Robert said.

"Hi," the little boy said.

"Aaron, this is Seb," Robert looked at him, hopefully.

Aaron moved down so he didn't seem so tall and held out his hand. "It's nice to meet you."

Seb stared at him. He seemed to glance between them. "Did you know my mum too?"

Aaron shook his head. "I know Robert, though."

Seb nodded. "You can help him read…You can be the animals."

Aaron found himself nodding.

He and Robert maneuvered so they could both see the book. And Robert read the narration as Aaron found himself playing the animals — it wasn't much different from things they did for Julie. But it felt different. It felt bigger. And he felt the weight of all it…

Robert looked as shocked as Aaron felt. But he also looked thankful — happy about having this child in his life. This son. And Aaron hated himself for feeling scared of it all.

It was going to change things.

That petrified him.

He loved Robert.

He needed him.

Robert tucked Seb into the bed and just ended up staring at him when he finally fell asleep. "He's…"

And Aaron was really looking at him too, he'd seen pictures of Robert as a child, and Vic — there was something distinctly Sugden about Seb… he felt it. He stared at him, and he saw it. He was Robert's. He was cute, small and he looked scared and sad the entire time. His family was dead. And now…

He'd taken to Robert.

Some instinct?

He felt it too, Aaron realized. This pull. This knowing. He was going to fall for Seb, just like he'd fallen for his father. But it still scared him, and he glanced back at Robert and saw that fear mirrored.

"Can I do this?" Robert whispered.

"I don't know," Aaron said, being honest. "I don't know if I can."

Robert's face fell…

Aaron hated that, and he grabbed his arm. "No, I don't mean… I mean, we try, yeah. He's pretty amazing."

"Yeah, yeah?"

"He knew all the words to that story.'

"Yeah."

"He's definitely yours."

"Wow."

Aaron bit his lip. "This is…scary."

"God, yes."

"But we try…."

"We?" Robert looked at him hopefully. "This isn't going to scare you off?"

Aaron shook his head.

"Because I don't think… I love you. I need you."

Those words made Aaron breathe easier.

"Me too."

Robert grabbed his face and kissed him. Aaron fell into it. It quelled some of the fear and confusion. He still felt like he was in a daze, but as they pulled apart, he stared at the sleeping child...

He felt it too.

Something important.

But he had no idea how they'd handle it.

"I'm scared," Robert whispered into his neck as they fell into a hug.

"Yeah," Aaron agreed.

They were on new ground.

Chapter Text

He stared at his phone.

Three new contacts. Rebecca's lawyer and two women from social services. He dropped his phone on the kitchen table and ran his hands down his face, and looked around the Mill — he tried to picture a child in it. Flashes of Julie being over flying easily to mind, but then they'd pack up her stuff and hand her back to Adam and Vic. Usually hopped up on sugar…

They didn't keep her.

He walked to the kettle and put it on, and noted the time on the stove. It was late, past midnight — Aaron's birthday was over, and the rings were still at the store… It felt like years ago he'd planned it now, his world felt oddly bigger now, and he felt different. Could you change in the span of hours? It hadn't even been half a day since he found about Seb.

He smiled, though, thinking about him. His face.

The door opened, and he turned to see Aaron walking in, a strange look on his face as he kicked off his boots by the door. Robert couldn't take his eyes off of him thought — maybe he looked as shellshocked as Robert felt. But he also was Aaron. The man with a face he could never get tired of looking at, who had a mouth he would endlessly try to make smile or smirk — the little lift at the corner of his mouth was the best. Especially if he was in one of his grumpier moods.

He breathed in a sigh of relief he was still here. With him. In their home. He'd looked ready to rabbit a few times at the White's house. Robert was a bit in shock he stayed, that he read with Seb — did the voices just because he asked and it'd done something to his chest, his heart pounded a bit, and it was almost like he fell for Aaron more.

He kept thinking he reached that limit and it'd happen again.

They jumped as the kettle started to whistle.

Aaron was walking toward him, then past him, and took it off the heat. But then he grabbed two shot glasses from their cupboard, then the whiskey they kept in the liquor shelf, and poured two shots. Robert shrugged as he was given the glass, and their eyes met, and they swallowed.

Robert opened his mouth, but he couldn't find words. What was going to say? The events of the last several hours almost felt like make-believe. Aaron gave him a nod and gently pushed Robert toward the couch, he sort fell onto the seat, and Aaron was next to him, practically on him, and Robert wrapped his arm around his shoulder and breathed easier as Aaron's head leaned in and onto him.

"He's cute," Aaron said.

"Yeah."

"He looks like you."

"Yeah…a bit. His hair reminds me of Vic's."

"Yeah?"

"When she was a baby."

"Oh."

"I…" Robert flailed for words. It was something he didn't like. He was a writer. He was a charmer. "Aaron, I …"

"Robert, you didn't do anything."

"Well, I kind of did, because…."

"We weren't together yet, not really… you said February, after Adam's birthday…that party?"

"Yeah…it was the last time I ever saw her," he shook his head. It hit him again that Rebecca was dead, and Chrissie.

Aaron ran his hand up and down Robert's arm. "You alright?"

"Don't know, I barely liked them…I knew them, though, and… she had my kid."

"You think she tried to tell ya?"

"Yeah… she started calling. I just thought she wanted the same thing as always, ignored the calls, they didn't stop, so I left a message to tell her I was with you… she never called back."

Aaron nodded.

"I never even thought her calling was weird — what's that say about my ego."

Aaron snorted.

"The letter she wrote was awful. She was terrified of Lachlan…" he yanked the paper out of his trouser pocket. "Said she was going to try to contact me, try again, I guess, but she never got the chance…."

"Lachlan, he was Chrissie's son?"

"Yeah. He was weird, a bit creepy, but I never thought… he killed his family. I mean, thank god, Seb wasn't in the car."

"Lucky that…"

"Seb," Robert said again, shaking his head at how easy it felt to use his son's name and how unfamiliar having a son felt at the same time. "Sebastian."

"Your son."

"Shit…" Robert leaned forward, heart pounding.

Aaron moved with him, hand on his back, and he stroked his spine. "Breathe."

"Breathe?" he glanced at him. "How are you breathing?"

Aaron snorted again but shrugged. "Maybe because your not."

"Aaron, if you can't do this…."

"Don't," Aaron snapped. "Don't you dare try to give me an out?"

"It's just it's a lot."

"I don't bloody care, your my… we're us, Robert, I can't be without you, and if you come with a kid…." Aaron inhaled sharply.

"Alright, I take it back. One of us needs to breathe when the other can't."

That made Aaron laugh.

They chuckled for a long while.

"I know it's big Robert, I'm not even sure I've wrapped my head around it. But… You're not hiding it. You love him. And I think, I think he was right awesome, wasn't he. The way he knew that story backward and forward," Aaron smiled.

"Love him bit yourself?"

"He reminded me of you," Aaron breathed.

Robert ducked his head down and inhaled.

"I do love him…I just I feel like I saw him, and something yanked my heart right at him. Closest I ever come to that before was when suddenly I really saw you for the first time… I just knew he was mine. I watched them take my bloods before you got there and thought this was stupid. He's mine."

Aaron nodded.

"Mum felt it too…." He looked at Aaron. "YOu aren't just saying…."

"No." Aaron looked mad again. "You want to fight?"

"God, no, never…I just it's a lot, and yeah, I'm back to that because that's where I'm am right now. I want to run. I keep thinking I'll be shit at it. How can I be dad, Aaron? My dad… look at Andy and me? I…"

"Shh…" Aaron stroked his spine again. "You'll be amazing."

Robert snorted.

"You will. I see you with Julie. I know you look forward to our times with her."

"We're the fun uncles."

"Yeah, but you were the only one who could make her stop crying last time she skinned her knee."

Robert shrugged.

"You're a right mother, hen, you know," Aaron laughed.

"Shut up."

"You'll be amazing, I know it — you always are."

Robert stared at him, into those blue eyes that were his home, and he touched Aaron's face. "You're biased."

"Yeah, well."

"I love you."

Aaron's smiled, all light.

"You'll be great with him. Just like you are with Julie. You're her favorite. I bet you'll be his too."

Aaron shook his head.

"It's true. Kids love ya."

"Shut up."

"You've got the knack. I was scared of Julie the first six months."

Aaron laughed.

"What if I do that now?" Robert frowned. "He's been through too much… God, he's lost his mum, I don't…."

"Rob…" Aaron smiled. "You're already amazing."

"This is fear."

"Come on, we should sleep…." Aaron tugged at his hand.

Robert nodded. He couldn't argue. He felt knackered. He felt punched out. Really, the world had given him a solid left hook from nowhere. Half of him wondered if he fell asleep and woke up if it'd turn out to be a wild dream…

But he looked at the man, taking him toward their bedroom, how he was standing right with him — despite being on the brink of scared breathless too. How he wouldn't even let Robert try to shove him away. Not even an inch. And thank god because he would've regretted it. He would've hated himself. Hated it.

He couldn't do it without Aaron.

He thought about the rings and the proposal he'd had planned.

It would have to wait.

But not for too long.

But for now, he could at least give Aaron one thing.

He yanked Aaron into him the minute they stepped into the bedroom and kissed him soundly, a bit desperately, trying to pour in all his gratefulness and his love. And maybe even his fear. Aaron responded in kind, but he looked at Robert with awe as they pulled back. Surprise.

"What's that for."

"Let's call it your last birthday present. I have some making up to do since I couldn't rescue you from the party."

Aaron snorted. "You had better things…."

"No. I had an important thing, but you, you are always important too. You're…" the man I'm going to marry. "I keep finding words lacking today, but you, your mine."

Aaron blushed and brushed his lips against Robert's. "Say it again."

"You're mine."

"You going to keep talking, or are you going to show me?"

"Oh, I'll show you…."

But by the time they hit the bed, naked, he wasn't the one in charge. Aaron took over, grateful soppy words in Robert's ear between dirty promises, as Aaron stroked his cock, before lubed fingers worked their inside of him. Their eyes met, Aaron panting over, staring down — making him believe he was amazing. That he was good enough…

For at least one person.

Aaron's forehead hit his, and he kissed Robert. A chaste kiss that he felt even deeper than fingers pleasuring him — it made him want more. Need more. Aaron kissed him again, then his cheek and his mouth at his ear again...

"All I ever needed for my birthday was just this, you, me, us…but you gave me more anymore. Showed me I matter…I'll try to do that too…."

"You do," Robert breathed and captured his lips.

Aaron nodded into the kiss, only breaking it to push inside of Robert.

Chapter Text

Robert paced the foyer of the White's home — it felt wrong being inside it. It felt weird waiting to see his son. His son. Words he believed he would never think in his lifetime. Terror rushed him, and he looked at the door. He'd taken the week off work, knowing he'd be useless, and honestly, there were too many things to deal with. He was meeting with social services. They were waiting on the blood tests. The lawyer wanted to talk with him about some things as well — he felt overwhelmed.

He looked at his watch.

Aaron should be here by now.

He panicked again and nearly did walk out the door when he heard the solicitor — Hilary, Hilaire, Ms. Dempsey. He turned and let her wave him into her/Lawrence's office. He stepped inside and watched her round the desk. He looked at the chair and thought about sitting. But he felt too restless.

"Is it just you today?" she asked.

"Aaron should be here, soon…" he said and looked behind him through the open door.

"And he is again? A family member?"

"My f…boyfriend," he swallowed back the slip. That hadn't happened yet. It was supposed to have. He needed to pick up the rings, he remembered for the billionth time. He inhaled.

Oh, how is he handling everything?"

"About the same as me, freaked out."

She smiled and pulled a folder toward her. "That is to be expected. This is a situation I haven't run into yet myself and been a solicitor for quite some time."

"I suppose it strange."

"There are some things about the estate you need to know."

"The estate?"

"Well, Lawrence's will left everything in equal measures to his daughters."

Robert nodded.

"Rebecca's will leaves everything to Sebastian."

"I see."

"Chrissie's left everything to, well, her son… And Lachlan had no will."

"Where is all of this going?"

"Well, it then usually all goes to the sole living heir. Which is Sebastian."

Robert blinked.

"Which since he is a child, it goes into a trust, the money anyway. There are the business shares and the house, and they have other holdings."

Robert sat down.

"It's quite complicated, and I'm sure you don't want to hear all the intricacies."

"No."

"But as Sebastian's Guardian, well, you will be soon enough a lot of it will fall to you."

"I don't want it."

"I would think about it."

"No…I just want to sort Seb…but doesn't Lawrence have any other family?"

"The only other person in his will is a Ronald Hale, but it's just some old letters and an unopened bottle of brandy…plus, we haven't been able to contact him."

"I see."

"I know this is a lot."

"Understatement but the business…" he shook his head. "That's not me. I realized that's not me."

"All right. We can work it."

Robert nodded, and he heard a door behind him.

He spun around and instantly felt more grounded.

Aaron found him easily, and their eyes locked.

He was in the room, their hands caught. "Um, Ms. Dempsey, this is my partner, Aaron Dingle."

"Nice to meet you, Mr. Dingle. We were just discussing the estate."

"The what?" Aaron stared at him.

"It's… a bit much," Robert muttered.

Aaron tugged at him until they were sitting in the chairs, hands still linked, and Robert let her catch up with Aaron. Aaron looking shocked and whispering, are you sure when Robert reiterated he didn't want anything to do with the business. He met Aaron's eyes and nodded. "It's not me, us."

Aaron smiled.

"Alright, um, Sally — Miss Davison from social services should be here soon. Would either of you like something to drink?"

They shook their heads.

"What, what are they going to need to know?" Aaron asked. "Social services."

"It'll mostly be a standard interview. Things are clear legally. It'll really be mostly about being sure Sebastian feels safe and is safe. I don't foresee any issues. I think it'll even be better they see Mr. Sugden is in a steady relationship. Support systems are important."

"We have my mum and sister too," Robert said.

Aaron nodded.

They glanced at each other, Aaron looked scared, but he met Robert's eyes and nodded. Robert nodded back. "Um, when can we see him?"

"After the interview."

The disappointment he felt, felt weird but good. Aaron squeezed his hand, and they glanced at each other again. Aaron shook his head a bit. "Weird, innit, being impatient for it?"

It made Robert breathe easier.

"You're both handling this very well," Ms. Dempsey said, and they heard the door again. Both of them stood up and turned, Robert felt a wave of panic, but he plastered on his charming smile as the social worker walked in.

~~~

Sarah sat in the cafe nervously chewing on a biscuit. She glanced at the time. The appointment had been hours ago, yet she still heard nothing from either Robert or Aaron. She frowned and wished again she'd offered to go with them — if for anything to see her grandson again. Little spitting image of Robert. It'd brought her back in time and how she'd met and fallen for this little boy…

Best decision of her life becoming his mum.

She sighed as she finished the biscuit and picked up another one.

"Mum?"

She looked up, and Vic was there, Julie on her hip, staring at her. "Why are you nervous eating."

"I'm not."

"Mum."

"Na, na," Julie laughed and reached to Sarah.

Sarah grinned and picked her up and let her grab the biscuit. Julie grinned and started to eat it. Her dark curls made her look more Barton than Sugden, but Sarah saw similarities between her and the little boy she'd just met. They were so close in age… What had Robert said? November and Julie was born in late February.

"Mum, you are looking at my daughter oddly."

Sarah just smiled. "I'm just happy."

"Are ya?"

"Of course."

"Are you ever going to tell me what happened with Robert yesterday? Adam got the run around from Aaron all morning, too, then he cut out early for some mysterious appointment. And Robert's been dodging my calls and texts."

"Victoria."

Vic raised an eyebrow. "Mum."

Sarah sighed, shook her head. "Not here."

"What?"

"Home," Sarah muttered and walked out the door. Heading toward Vic's front door.

Vic moved ahead of her, unlocked the door, and went inside. "Mum? Really, you're freaking me out."

"It's just…." Sarah sighed. "Alright. Sit."

Vic sat down.

Sarah put down Julie, who went right for her coloring corner. She smiled at that and looked at Vic. "She's perfect."

Vic grinned. "I know."

"So is…" Sarah opened her phone and pulled up the picture she'd snuck of Robert holding Sebastian and handed it to Vic. "So is Sebastian."

Vic stared at the picture. "That's… Rob."

"Yes."

"And a kid?"

"Yes."

"What?"

"Sebastian," Sarah said again. "It's new, and please only tell Adam, and please tell him to keep it quiet. Robert's too busy and shocked to think about telling you. But you should know."

"Mum…who, what…."

"Rebecca White."

"What? When…." Vic narrowed her eyes. "He'd never cheat on Aaron."

"Well, of course not," Sarah shook her head. "It was shortly before they became serious, though. Before your wedding."

"Oh…" Vic stared at the picture. "Oh, god, he's lost his mum."

"I know."

"His whole family…."

"Not his whole family," Sarah pointed out.

Vic shook her head. "Rob? A dad?"

"Last thing I think he thought he wanted… but he fell right in love with him."

"Well, he's so cute…."

"Quite."

Vic handed back her phone. "Text that to me, I want it, and I'll need proof for Adam."

Sarah laughed and texted it.

"I just… Rob, a kid?" Vic smiled. "Though I never saw him and Aaron coming either."

"They're both scared witless."

Vic nodded. "Aaron's great with kids, though, and he's mad about Robert."

"It'll be a lot, but I have faith in them. Just don't go spreading this around."

"No, no, we won't, Mum…wow…" she opened the text Sarah sent. "He looks just like Robert."

"Near a perfect look-alike… you're the one who had that red hair, though."

"Oh yeah…"

"It's a lot and sad. It's very bittersweet."

"When can I meet?"

"Oh, honey, I don't know. The blood test has to come through and social services. The White's solicitor asked to meet with Robert today. He and Aaron went hours ago now. I was hoping to hear something by now."

"This is better than expected. Everyone had me worried. But a nephew. How amazing…" she glanced at Julie. "She'll love a playmate."

"They're going to need us, Vic, to help them figure this out."

Vic nodded. "Of course, I mean they help with Julie all the time. Only fair, innit that I help them."

Sarah nodded.

"Maybe though they'll learn why it's evil to get a kid hopped on sugar."

Sarah laughed. "Vic, your brother knows exactly what he was doing there."

Vic laughed. "He is evil."

Sarah laughed, and her phone rang. "Oh, maybe this is Robert… Oh. It's Andy."

Vic frowned. "Are you going to tell him?"

"No, no, not without running it by Robert. Not Andy…." Sarah sighed. "I wish they could work things out."

"Me too.'

"Andy?" Sarah answered the phone. "What, yes, of course, I can pick up Sarah for you….see you soon." She hung up. "Sarah needs picking up from Debbie's…remember only Adam."

"Can I tell Robert?" Vic asked. "I wanna check-in?"

"Get me in trouble?" Sarah laughed. "Yes, go on then. I'll see you soon…" she went over to Julie and kissed her head goodbye before going to pick up her oldest granddaughter.

~~~

They were told Seb was in the playroom, and Aaron shook his head at that as he walked up the stairs — he couldn't help but wonder what was going to happen when they took the kid from a huge house into the Mill. Though, that was probably the least of their worries. Sebastian's life was upended in a billion other ways. Space might not even register to him…

Maybe?

Robert was quiet next to him. Almost too quiet. But Aaron could hear him thinking — hear him worrying. The social worker had given them the go ahead to explain who Robert was to Sebastian.

That was daunting. Aaron felt sweaty the closer they got to the room. Robert looked paler and paler to him. His freckles stark, and he grabbed his hand. To offer solid ground and a lifeline. To give himself the same thing. They were better together — he'd learned that a long time ago.

Robert squeezed his hand and sent him a thankful smile.

Aaron grinned back.

"Robber, Awon…." Sebastian's voice pulled them away from each other. He raced over to them, holding a piece of paper. "I drew you this."

Robert was already down on his knees to be level with Seb, and he took the drawing and glanced back at Aaron. He dropped down too, and they looked at the squiggles and figures on the paper.

"It's us, you reading to me."

Robert blinked, and his voice cracked. "You liked that, yeah?"

"Yeah," Seb said, but his little face fell. "I miss mummy tucking me in, though. She still in that place?"

"Yeah, bud…" Aaron said.

Seb frowned.

"Look, Seb…um…." Robert swallowed hard. "Can I pick you up?"

Seb nodded.

Robert picked him up.

Seb smiled and poked his cheek and looked at Aaron, then poked at his beard.

Aaron smiled.

"It's soft."

"It is…" Robert laughed, and he carried Seb over to a chair in the room. He put him down and sat on the table in front of it, and glanced at Aaron. Aaron sat down next to him. "I have something to tell ya."

"You're not gonna go away, are ya?" Seb cried.

Aaron felt like his heart was yanked out of his chest. "No, no, we aren't."

Seb hiccuped but looked between them. "You're nice."

Robert chuckled a bit. "Not used to be called that."

"Why not?"

Aaron ran his hand down his back.

"Seb, um…you know that some kids have a mum and dad?"

Seb nodded. "Mummy said my daddy was completed."
"Yeah, the thing is…it's not anymore."

"It's not."

"I'm your dad," Robert breathed out.

Seb stared at him.

Aaron nodded.

Seb looked at him. "Is Awon too?"

They glanced at each other.

Robert smiled. "Aaron's special. He's kind of mine. So that makes him yours too."

Seb stared at them. "You're my daddy?"

"That alright?"

Seb nodded, but he stayed quiet.

Robert gave Aaron a nervous glance.

"Seb, what is it?"

"Mummy, Gramps, and Auntie went away."

"Yeah."

"What if you go away?"

"We won't," Robert breathed.

"Are you gonna live here?"

"Uh…" Robert shook his head. "We live someplace else, and I'm hoping you can come with us there soon."

Seb looked around. "But this is where I live."

"But we want you with us," Aaron said.

Seb stared at him.

"It won't be right away, but we're gonna come here every day until it's time," Robert said.

"Every day?"

They both nodded.

Seb looked around, sniffled, and looked back. "I don't really like it here without mummy."

Aaron looked away and wiped at his own eyes.

"Come here," Robert breathed, and Aaron turned back to watch Robert hug Seb, squeezing him tight and solid. And he hoped it made the kid feel as loved and safe as he did when he was in them.

Chapter Text

"Aaron..."

He cursed and stopped trying to dodge her by darting behind a sales cart in David's. He turned and forced himself to smile. "Hi ya."

Chas shook her head. "That's all I get. I haven't see ya for over a week, you've been dodging my calls, and the most I get is a one word text."

"Just been busy."

"Funny that, because Paddy was talking to Adam, and he mentioned it being a slow week at the scrapyard."

"Did he..." Aaron shrugged. "Maybe because I've been doing all the work."

"Hmm... Is something going on?"

"What, no..." He could hear Robert calling him a horrible liar in his head.

Chas' eyes narrowed.

"Everything is fine," he muttered.

"So, you haven't been dodging me since your birthday party."

"Just busy, Mum. Robert's busy. We're barely making time for each other."

"Like he didn't make time for your party."

Aaron thought his eyes were going to roll out of his head. "Mum, I've already told you, he was amazing for a birthday."

"Still couldn't make it to the family party."

"He was busy."

"With what?"

Aaron grumbled.

"Aaron, he's never at the family things."

"Not like he's made to feel welcome when he does. Why should he bother," Aaron snapped?

Chas opened her mouth and shook her head. "That's unfair."

"Is it?" Aaron sighed. "You didn't want him at the party, Mum."

"I still expected him to show up."

Aaron shook his head. "Doesn't what I feel matter more? He's not let me down. Once."

"Give him time," Chas muttered.

Aaron scoffed and walked away.

"Wait, Aaron..."

He barged out of the shop.

"Aaron."

He kept walking.

"Look, alright, that was out of line. I don't want to fall out over him."

Aaron rolled his eyes again. "Are you sure about that?"

"What does that mean?"

"It means you harp on how he's awful all the time, without one shred of evidence for it, and yet you don't want to fall out over him."

"I just think..."

"What?"

"That he's done horrible things."

"And?" Aaron shrugged. "Me too, you too."

"But...I learned from my mistakes, so have you."

"So has he."

"So he claims."

"Stop having different rules for him."

Chas sputtered.

"I mean it, mum..." Aaron sighed. "I can't keep having this conversation after something as innocuous as him missing a family party you only grudgingly invited him to. I can't have you acting like he's a criminal because I chose to avoid you for a bit... Because you're awful to him. There are..." He snapped his mouth shut before he said anything that might lead to Sebastian.

He knew what her questions would be. He knew what she'd twist it into... And he was afraid where else she might take it to... He just didn't want to hear it. He felt a bit fragile enough about it all. Not that he was upset with Robert, he wasn't because he'd done nothing wrong.

No, it was that it was a huge life-changing thing. It was because he'd never envisioned himself with children. And now he'd be helping Robert raise his son -- and it was raising him. He fought back a smile at the thought, though. They'd spent a lot of time with Seb... Both to get to know him and so, he would know them. They wanted to make the transition to the Mill, to their home, to being in their lives 24/7 as easy as possible.

It would be a challenge.

All Aaron knew is they'd both fallen hard for Seb...Aaron fell harder for Robert through it all. Watching him take on his son without blinking, watching him fall in love with his son. Watching him fight down the urge to run from the responsibility and instead tackle it. It made it easier for him to tackle it -- he knew they were both terrified.

Their lives were never going to be the same.

Aaron just wanted to learn the new path together.

In fact, he really just wanted to get home.

"He's expecting me," Aaron said.

"But..." Chas whined.

"Mum."

"Call him, have him to the pub. I'll buy you two dinner, we can catch up. I'll try..." She smiled.

She'd try.

It always went there and never stayed there.

"Not now. We have too much on."

"You have what on?"

"Life, don't we... We're busy, Mum, alright. I'll just call you when I can..." He shrugged and knew it was the best he could give her. He truly didn't want to tell her about Sebastian until they had him settled in the Mill. Maybe it was daft to think he could hide it from her that long...

They couldn't keep inside all the time.

But he wanted a few days of them under the same roof before he opened that can of worms. That very tiring can worms.

"Aaron, I'll try."

"Heard it before," he muttered and walked off.

She called his name again, but he just kept walking home. He got to the door when he realized he hadn't gotten them the pizzas. Briefly, he thought about turning back around, but he was afraid his mum might still be standing there in the street. He just couldn't. She was tiring. She was more exhausting than a three-year-old...

He was about to open the door when it opened, and Sarah was there.

"What's happened," she said immediately.

He laughed.

"Nothing bad then?"

"Just me mum...ran into her. Been dodging her."

"Robert mentioned..." Sarah walked back into the Mill. "He's had to run out and do a last-minute errand. I put together the mishmash you have in your fridge to start a soup."

Aaron nodded. "Good, because I forgot the pizza I was getting."

"You two have been living off takeaway too much lately."

"A lot to do. We're both too tired."

"I know, but raising kids means also taking care of yourselves."

Aaron nodded and sat down.

"Robert's mentioned you don't want to tell Chas yet."

He nodded.

"I know she'll probably accuse Robert of all sorts..."

He nodded.

"And we both know it will be rubbish."

He nodded.

"Why not get it over with?"

He chewed on his lip. "Because I'm scared...of it all. Being a...I don't even know what to call what I'll be. I'm promising to raise a kid, and I thought I'd never have one. And Robert too, we're there, together. But we love him, and he's..." Aaron grinned. "He's so funny and smart... And I just get this punch in my chest when I watch them together."

"Family," Sarah smiled.

He nodded. "I just don't want her dumping on it, I don't want her narrowing in on my doubts and nagging at them...because they're small compared to the fact I want this...I never saw it coming, but I want it. I fell for that kid so fast, and I think he fell faster."

"They do grab your hearts..." Sarah smiled. "I loved Robert before I loved Jack."

"Never felt out of place since you're not..."

"Blood? No. Sometimes I felt like he was more mine than Jack's -- and honestly, now, I know that was the truth. I tried to remind myself I wasn't his real mum, sometimes. But it just never felt right, so I stopped. Jack liked to remind me, though when things were bad..." She sighed. "Doesn't matter how or when you get your child, Aaron. If you love them, if they've punched into your heart, they are yours."

He nodded.

"And Chas..."

"What?"

"She loves the bones off of you... I know she's far from perfect. I know she has notions about Robert that she can't see her way past...and I would love to make her see sense. Just do let her try when she wants, and lying to her or omitting things won't help the situation."

"I need the time of it, just the three of us for a bit."

Sarah nodded. "I know. I've been told I have a wait a few days."

Aaron laughed.

"And I will, but you aren't the only two people who fell in love with him. That sweet boy is my grandson."

"We need it."

Sarah nodded. "I know you boys do. I think you'll do better than you think."

"Hope so."

"Alright, you go get out of your work clothes while I finish this soup. Robert should be back soon, and we can discuss the details..."

"Yeah, um, they were supposed to tell him today if it's Saturday or Sunday, we can bring him home."

Sarah nodded. "Go on, clean up."

He nodded and walked up the stairs.

~~~

There was a line in the jewelry store. He looked at his watch and sighed. He supposed it was right after work hours, but he hadn't expected a bloody line. He'd just wanted to get in and get out. Get back home, finish some of the toddler proofing they were doing and make sure Seb's room was in proper order -- again. He kept feeling like he was missing something...

Probably the knowing what the hell he was doing as a father.

He shook it off.

He'd be home by Monday.

Home.

With him and Aaron.

Then the three of them for at least a week. No one else, just trying to find a rhythm.

We can do this.

He checked his watch again. His heart was beating in his ears. He needed the rings. He needed another game plan for his proposal. He thought maybe their anniversary, but it was coming up too soon, and they'd be wrapped up in Sebastian...

Sebastian would always be there.

He swallowed.

But Aaron, Aaron was taking on his kid with him -- he was less nervous about his proposal because of it. A part of him been a bit terrified asking Aaron to marry him might scare Aaron...

Make him want to run.

But he was taking on his child.

If that didn't tell him, Aaron wanted forever.

He was finally at the counter.

"How may I help you?"

"I'm picking up two rings. Name is Sugden."

"Alright..." She turned to look in a drawer behind her. "Oh, here you go. All paid for."

He nodded and took the package with a murmured thank you, and turned to walk out of the store. As he stepped outside, he heard someone yell his name, and he paused and looked back.

"Mr. Sugden..."

He turned and laughed a bit. It always made him feel weird when someone his own age called him Mr. Sugden -- but he was a tutor, and the professional line was important. Angie was one of his better students. She'd really come to him for a refresher more than anything else before she took a test to get into a graduate program.

"Angie, hello...how did the test go."

"Passed it easily, thank you. Not sure I could have without the time to study."

He nodded.

"My kids are happy I'm usually home at dinner time, though. Just had some errands today."

He lifted the bag the rings were in. "Same."

"Holcomb Jewelers, pricey, who is the lucky woman?"

"Man, actually...his name is Aaron...." He looked at her and his bag. "Actually, um... I wouldn't mind a second opinion. One that's less biased than my mum, I think they're right for us, I agonize forever, but um, well, something got in the way of the proposal...." He clacked his mouth shut. "I'm babbling."

"You're going to propose? That's amazing. Yes, I'll look," she laughed.

He took a breath, not entirely sure where his nerves on the rings suddenly came from, but the truth was he'd expected to get them and propose. That way, he wouldn't have time to think about it too much... And what if Aaron hated the rings. What if he didn't want a ring?

He was sure about them.

The details were harder.

And their lives.

He took another breath and pulled the box out of the bag.

Angie took the box and opened it. She grinned widely. "Oh, wow, these are nice, it's simple, isn't it, but not boring. They're tasteful. I don't really know his style, but I can see you wearing it."

"He's a hoodie kind of guy. I'm not even sure if he'll like a ring..."

"Just have to ask him."

Robert laughed and took the box back, staring at them. "Yeah, well, our lives got complicated recently, not sure when I can... Um, thanks for not making me feel daft for the sudden nerves."

"Thank you for helping me pass that test."

"YOu did pay me."

"Even so, you cared."

He shrugged, but the truth was he did care about his students. He never thought it was something he would care about, but it wasn't just a job to him. He felt useful at it instead of just good at it...

He'd just been good at his old job.

His phone rang. "That's him, probably wondering where I am."

"Goodbye," she said.

He turned around, made sure the rings were safe in the back, and pulled out his phone. "Hey."

"Your mum made us soup. We thought you'd be back?"

"Yeah, the errand too a bit longer than I thought...getting in the car now."

"Alright... Get home, will ya?"

Robert smiled. "I miss you too."

"Shut up..."

"Never."

"Yeah, yeah, see ya."

Robert grinned as he climbed into the car. He put the rings in the glove compartment and took a breath. He wasn't sure when. He just knew it would happen... He'd ask Aaron to marry him.

He just knew that first, they had to find their footing with Sebastian.

Chapter Text

Seb was asleep by the time they pulled up to the Mill. The both of them been quiet the entire ride. But their hands had been clasped, and Robert knew Aaron looked in the backseat as often as he had -- despite driving. It was just hard not to look at Seb...

It still didn't entirely feel real.

Aaron turned off the car, and they both twisted to look at him. Sound asleep in the car seat. Robert felt like he was smiling and frowning at the same time. Seb seemed happy to see them when they'd arrived to pick him up but also confused about all his things being packed up and that he was leaving his house. Robert wasn't at all sure they'd explained it well enough. They'd probably have to explain it again and again.

"Do we wake him?" Aaron asked in a whisper.

"Try not to?" Robert shook his head. He didn't know. He was slightly regretting not asking his mum to be with them. But this was their little family, wasn't it? He took a breath. "Unlock the door and all, and I'll see if I can get him out without waking him."

Aaron nodded. "Lots of stuff to unload."

The car was full of Seb's things -- even after them taking a day or two to slowly bring stuff over. It was possible he had too many things, being spoiled by his rich family. But it was all just things. It wasn't the mother, Aunt, or grandfather he missed. It wasn't lost on him that he'd never mentioned Lachlan -- he thought about Rebecca's letter and truly hoped whatever the young teen had done, Seb hadn't processed it.

They got out of the car quietly. Robert looked around. Half worried a family member might appear -- especially Aaron's side. They were all still clueless about what was happening. He was half surprised Adam hadn't let anything slip to his mother and, therefore, Cain. But so far, so good -- not that he wanted to keep it a secret. Either did Aaron, really. But it was going to cause trouble, and he agreed with Aaron. They needed to sort out this new life a bit before they had to deal with what might come from telling Chas.

Robert promised himself for the billionth time he'd try with her.

He watched Aaron grab a few bags and head toward the door.

He'd do anything for him.

He turned to the car. And the sleeping child they were finally bringing home.

He opened the backdoor and resisted the urge to run his hand through Seb's hair, and tried to avoid the trap of just staring at him. He wondered if that would ever stop. They just stare at him in awe, this wonder buzzing through him. He started to unbuckle him and cringed at how loud it all seemed. But Seb slept through it. He'd never actually seen him in quite so deep a sleep, whenever they'd been at the White's and reading to him, his sleep always seemed so light -- he'd wake up when they tried to leave more than once. Maybe it'd been the car ride? He carefully lifted him up, and Seb murmured but just buried his face into Robert's neck and stayed asleep.

He held his breath, though, as he walked into the Mill.

Aaron held the door open and smiled. "Still out?"

"Think it was the car."

Aaron nodded.

Robert walked upstairs and took Seb into his bedroom. He carefully put him down on the bed and tucked the blankets around him. Aaron was right behind him. He felt Aaron slip his arms around his waist, and he reached back to hug him as well. They stood there.

"Worried about him waking up in a strange place?" Aaron said, mirroring his thoughts.

"Yeah...unload the car. I'll stay here. Then I'll start unpacking while you do?"

Aaron nodded, but he stayed put.

Robert didn't mind. He turned, keeping them entangled though and met Aaron's eyes, and found that blue that was home. "Thank you," he whispered and smiled when Aaron shook his head.

"You don't have to..."

"I know, but..this was so much to ask."

"I keep telling ya, it's not....it's you, and he's..." Aaron shrugged.

"You're amazing," Robert shook his head. "Not sure how I managed to get you."

Aaron blushed.

"I..." Robert felt the rush of how deeply he didn't feel like he deserved Aaron. Or Seb. He looked back at the bed. "Go on. We better get everything inside."

Aaron pressed a kiss to his cheek and left.

Robert sat down in the rocking chair they'd put by Seb's bed, for when they read to him or needed to be with him. He knew Seb was having nightmares. He hoped they wouldn't last much longer. They had a therapist for him, for the transition, for the grief. Robert sighed and thought about Rebecca. He thought about Chrissie...

Guilt churning and bad memories of the lie he'd thought he needed to live.

But he looked at Seb and wondered if maybe one thing good came out of it.

~~~

Aaron stared at the suitcases and bundles that he'd put inside the door of the Mill and sighed. He was knackered from bringing it all in. Maybe they'd decided to bring too much with them. But they'd been afraid of leaving behind something Seb would cry for...

Fear felt like a constant state.

He frowned as his phone vibrated in his pocket. He was back to avoiding his family. He felt guilty but no matter how he turned it over in his head. Telling them what was going on wasn't an option yet. But he should probably text back and try to put them off a bit longer.

It was a message from Paddy. Babbling and weird, of course. Saying he had to talk to him, it was important. He and Chas needed to tell him something. He frowned at that and sighed. Maybe it was a family thing. He should stay in the loop. He looked upstairs, but it was quiet. Hopefully, that meant Seb was still sleeping.

The little boy seemed to need and if the car ride had helped like Robert thought... That was good. He dialed Paddy's number.

"Aaron, finally..." Paddy said.

"Been busy."

"It's just that this is important."

"What is it? Everything alright with the family?"

"The family, yeah, yeah, they are fine. Your mum and I really need to tell you something."

"What?"

"Not over the phone."

"Well, it's going to have to be. I'm busy."

"Just come to the pub."

"I can't."

"But..." Paddy made some stammering noises.

Aaron sighed. "Look, I've got to go."

"No, wait, I rather... And your mum would want to be here, but..."

"But?"

"I'm going to text you something."

"Will ya just hurry? I'm busy."

His phone dinged.

He opened the text to find a fuzzy picture that looked like Robert standing on the street talking to someone, people out of focus from walking past them and around them. He stared at it, confused. "Paddy?"

"You see."

"I see?"

"He's cheating on ya."

Aaron rolled his eyes.

"Aaron, you must see it. He's giving her jewelry. It was right outside Holcomb's. I saw him give her the box."

Aaron peered at the pictures. He actually thought the woman looked vaguely familiar. He saw no box. He looked upstairs and down again. "Paddy, I see nothing to worry about."

"You what...I caught him red-handed."

"You got him talking to someone on the street..." Aaron sighed. He was tired.

"You can't trust him. He gave her jewelry..."

He heard footsteps.

Robert was walking down the stairs, the baby monitor in his hands. Their eyes met, and Robert frowned. "What is it?" he mouthed.

"Paddy, hang on..." He showed Robert the pictures.

Robert stared at them for a beat before recognition hit. "That's Angie. You met her one day when you had to pick me up at work."

Aaron nodded, remembering now. She'd been nice, thankful for Robert's help. "Paddy thinks you gave her jewelry."

Robert's face went weird.

Aaron stared at him.

"I, uh...no, I was showing her something I bought for mum...it was an impulse, and I'd run into her and figured..."

"Yeah, well, Paddy's convinced, which means mum is. No wonder phone has been blowing up. Surprised they didn't come over."

"Keep them gone," Robert looked upstairs.

Aaron nodded and put his phone back up to his mouth. "Paddy."

"You must see."

"I see someone he taught, Paddy. He's not cheating on me."

"Aaron, you can't believe..."

Aaron just sighed. "I met her, Paddy. Her name is Angie, she was his student. She's married, and Robert isn't who he used to be. You and mum need to quit. What were you skulking about taking photos of him anyway?"

Robert snorted and went to the kitchen. "Going make a brew, they we can upstairs?"

Aaron nodded.

"Aaron, he gave her..."

"He showed her something he bought for Sarah...back off." Aaron hung up. He felt. Exhausted. He was mad, he was, but he couldn't. He had too many other things going on right now. He just couldn't deal with them wanting to see the worst of Robert...

He knew him.

He trusted him.

There wasn't a doubt in his head.

"I'm going to go up," Aaron said.

Robert nodded.

~~~

Robert watched Aaron go up the stairs and immediately pulled out his cellphone the moment he knew he was out of earshot. He called his mum and held his breath a bit -- he hated lying to Aaron. But he couldn't very well tell what had really been in the jewelry box.

"Is Seb settled?"

"He fell asleep in the car, hasn't woken up yet....um."

"Um?"

"Alright, um, Paddy saw me talking to someone on the street and assumed I was cheating because I handed her a jewelry box to ask for her opinion on something."

"HE WHAT?"

"Yeah, he took pictures, just told Aaron..."

"How dare..."

"Mum, that's not my issue."

"It isn't... Aaron."

"Didn't believe it for a second. Anyway, mum, I had to lie to Aaron about the box...."

"Why?"

Robert glanced up the stairs. "I was... I was going to propose on his birthday."

Sarah squealed. He pulled the phone away from his ear. "Mum."

"Oh, I am so happy...."

"Mum."

"But this is amazing, Robert...."

He grinned. "I know, but mum, I had to tell Aaron it was for you."

"Oh, oh, of course, I'll cover if he brings it up, or they bring it up. When are you going to do it?"

"I don't know, I really... Timing is all messed up, isn't it?"

"I admit you boys do have a load on your plate, but Robert, it's amazing. I'm so happy. You and Aaron are just right for each other. Don't wait too long."

"I won't, I mean... I really want this mum."

"I know."

"Alright, thanks..."

"Anything. Send me pictures of my grandson."

"Yeah, yeah..." He hung up, poured the tea, and headed upstairs with the mugs.

As he got closer to Seb's room, he heard their voices. Aaron speaking lowly, and Seb asking questions about where he was and why. Robert took a breath and walked in.

Seb saw him and smiled. "Robber!"

"Hey," he grinned and put the mugs down on the dresser by the door. "You alright?"

He nodded but looked around. "Awon said this is my room?"

"Yeah," Robert said and walked in and sat on the edge of the bed. "Like it?"

Seb looked around.

"Is that my panda..." He pointed at a large panda that was in the corner.

"Yeah, we brought that with us. We wanted you to feel at home."

"Home?"

Robert looked at Aaron.

"Yeah, because this is our home, so it's your home too," Aaron explained.

Seb looked around. "Becuz mummy can't be here?"

Robert nodded and rubbed Seb's head. "Yeah, I know it's a change."

Seb looked around more.

Robert wished he could guess what he was thinking, how he understood all of this.

"You two live here?"

"Yeah, we can show you the rest of the house if you want."

Seb nodded.

"Alright, let's get you untuck, yeah..." Robert pulled at the covers.

Aaron offered Seb his hands.

They all stood up.

And gave Seb a tour.

Less than an hour later, they were tucking him back into the bed and asking what story he wanted, and he asked to sit on Robert's lap while Aaron read, so they did that... Until he conked out again. Robert carefully wrapped him back into his bed and sighed.

"That almost felt too easy," he laughed.

Aaron nodded. "Yeah."

Neither of them moved.

They found themselves sitting on the floor at the foot of the bed. Afraid to leave the room, really, or not wanting to. Robert burrowed into Aaron's side, and Aaron pulled him close. He took a deep breath, the conversation downstairs coming back to him now, when he had a moment to breathe...

"Aaron, I'd never cheat...'

"Hey..." Aaron breathed out. "I know."

"I just...." Robert sighed. "I get why people think I would... I was, you know, I was awful."

"Was," Aaron said. "Was awful at times myself."

"Not like...."

"Don't," Aaron sighed. "Just don't let Paddy or mum get to ya. I knew I knew I was looking at nothing, alright. It doesn't matter what fiction they come up with -- you should ask them for story ideas."

"Nah, too trite and cliche."

Aaron snorted.

"Just having you believe in me..." Robert sighed. "Thank you."

"I know you," Aaron said. "Who you really are...maybe someday my family will see it."

"I don't care if they do," Robert said. "I just wish they'd stop hurting you with it."

Aaron frowned and burrowed himself into Robert. "All I care about right now is us and this boy."

Robert smiled. "Yeah, I like that."

"Me too."

Chapter Text

Sarah fiddled with the necklace she'd pulled out from the back of her closet. The things she did for Robert. Or any of her children, really — but she'd had a feeling that whatever fantasies Chas and Paddy had in their heads wasn't going to calm down from one phone conversation with Aaron. So she'd found an opal, Jack given her decades ago, probably that she'd never actually liked, so never worn…

It would do the trick.

Possibly sooner than rather, Chas was stalking up to her on the street, a grim look on her face. Sarah schooled her features and fought not to roll her eyes. She kept walking toward David's. She had groceries that needed buying.

"Sarah…"

"Chas, good day," she said with a smile.

"We need to talk."

"Do we?"

"It's about the… your son."

"Andy?" She wasn't quite sure why'd she'd done that.

"Robert."

"Oh. Well, you know Andy is doing much better these days, counseling and all, and he sees Jack and Sarah more."

"Sarah, Robert."

"Oh, he's doing well too, really loves his job, has his writing classes, groups… his last story came in second place…."

"I don't care."

Sarah stared at her.

Chas sighed. "I know you don't want to hear this, but he's cheating on our Aaron."

"No, he isn't."

"Yes, yes he is…." Chas shoved her phone in Sarah's face.

Sarah looked at the photo. Blurry, out of focus, her son, and some woman with dark hair. "Huh. This won't win any photo competitions."

"That's not the point. Paddy caught him red-handed."

"Doing what? Standing on the street."

"He gave her jewelry."

Sarah fiddled with the opal…a bit, obviously. "Jewelry, you say?"

"Yes. A box."

"Oh. Huh. He just gave me this the other day," she lifted the opal off her chest. "Lovely, isn't it."

Chas stared at it. "What?"

"Yeah, he's always like that. Random gifts at odd times. I'm sure Aaron's mentioned it…it's all bit over the top. But Robert."

"I…"

"Holcombs, wasn't it? That Paddy saw him near?"

Chas sputtered.

"Anyway… I need to get some eggs. Have a lovely day, Chas."

"No…" Chas said.

Sarah stopped and turned. "No?"

"He's cheating. Paddy saw him."

Sarah rolled her eyes. "Chas, I don't know who that woman is, but I know my son is not cheating on Aaron."

"He didn't make Aaron's birthday party. There was some awful excuse. It wasn't even one. Aaron's just refusing to see it. He told Paddy he trusts him…hmmph."

"Aaron has no reason not to."

"Of course he does. He has form."

"So, once a cheater, always a cheater?"

"You said it, Sarah."

"Better be watching out for your Paddy then, huh…." Sarah smiled and walked off. She heard Chas behind her, squawking indignation. But it was truly worth it, really…. It was rather tiresome hearing them on their high horses all the time about Robert.

She walked into David's and smiled, spotting Vic and Julie by the candy display. Victoria taking a chocolate bar out of Julie's hand. "Ah, the Sugden sweet tooth," Sarah smiled.

"Mum, you cannot buy it for her."

"CANDY…." Julie yelled and gave Sarah a toothy grin.

"Sorry, sweetheart," Sarah ran her hand through her dark curls.

Vic shook her head. "Have you been over yet?"

"Not yet. They said they wanted another day."

"I don't see how they're keeping him all cooped in?"

"Vic, they have a backyard," Sarah laughed.

"Still…I suppose it made sense, a week of settling in, learning his sleep patterns and all."

"They've got a mountain, got a few panicked calls, but I think they're both rising up. Robert sounds more in love with Seb every day."

Vic hugged Julie to her legs. "Know the feeling."

"Me too," Sarah smiled at her.

"Dinner tonight?" Vic asked.

Sarah nodded. "I'd love to. I'm planning to drive out to see Andy for lunch. But I'll be home in time."

Vic nodded but sighed. "He's doing better?"

"It's getting there."

"He's going to go back to the farm?"

"Well, he can't let Pete Barton run it forever," Sarah said. "It'll work out."

Vic nodded, but she looked worried.

"What is it, Robert?"

Vic nodded. "I just, can they work it out?"

"It's up to them, sweetheart."

"I don't like feeling the middle, and I always end up..."

"Same. I'll tell Andy to call you. You two need a catch-up."

Vic nodded. "I do miss him."

Sarah nodded.

"Granma?" Julie tugged on Sarah's leg.

"Yes, sweetie?"

"Bring me candy?"

Sarah laughed. "How about tonight I read you to sleep?"

Julie's face lit up. "Yes."

Sarah smiled and kissed her head.

"Alright, I got to get her to the nursery."

Sarah nodded and started to do her shopping. She turned a corner, and there was Paddy. She sighed. "Patrick, I've already had it out with Chas..."

"I caught him red-handed."

"You really didn't."

"He was all charming and smug...." Paddy said.

Sarah rolled her eyes.

"He met that woman."

"Or ran into someone he knows."

"He doesn't know women he hasn't...you know...that..."

Sarah stared at him. "My son is no some Don Juan."

"Isn't he?"

"Daddy, he's not hurting Aaron. He wouldn't dream of it."

"He's isolated him."

"What now?"

"No one has seen Aaron in well over a week. He's barely answering his phone, and when he does, he curt and takes off. Robert's keeping him from his family."

"Ever think he's avoiding you because of you?" Sarah asked.

Paddy stammered.

"Robert is not keeping Aaron from you. That is a ridiculous accusation."

Paddy frowned. "We know what we see."

"And it's not biased at all," Sarah snorted and walked away. She finished up her shopping, packed up her car, and got in. She glanced toward the Mill -- she wanted to go over, but she knew they weren't ready yet. That what they were doing with Sebastian was important. She knew it hadn't been an easy week, but it'd been a good one nonetheless. She wouldn't butt her nose in yet...

As much as she wanted to want to get to know her grandson herself.

But she sighed. She felt like she needed to warn Aaron.

She pulled out her phone and dialed his cell.

"Sarah?"

"You answered."

"Yeah, well... Everything alright?"

"That mum?" she heard Robert in the background.

"Keep up the cooking...." Aaron said. "Sarah, what is it?"

"Robert mentioned that little fantasy your parents have cooked up."

Aaron sighed.

"They aren't giving it up. I even showed Chas the necklace Robert bought me..." She rolled her eyes a bit at that little lie, but if it helped son with his planned proposal worth it.

"I'm sorry, Sarah."

"Don't be, sweetheart. I just wanted to let you know. I know you have a lot on, but maybe answer their calls a bit more. They have all sorts in their head."

"What? Robert's got me locked up and not letting me have my phone."

"Well..."

Aaron groaned.

Sarah wished she could make it better.

"How am I going to tell them about Seb?" Aaron asked.

"Honestly. It'll be up to them how they respond...." She said. She could hear Aaron chewing his lip. "Aaron?"

"I just, why are they set on seeing the worst?"

"I wish I knew."

Aaron sighed. "Thanks for the heads up. Robert's finished our dinner..."

"Go eat, enjoy, kiss both of them for me."

Aaron laughed and hung up.

Sarah sighed and headed home.

~~~

Aaron sat on the edge of the bed, listening to Robert tucking Seb in for the night. The little boy trying to stall things by asking for a third story -- which was par for the course. They weren't sure quite why he kept trying to stay up later and later. If it was that, he understood he had nightmares and was trying to avoid them. Or if he was worried Robert and him might go away...

He asked a lot if he was really staying with them, that it was really forever. And they'd promised over and over. He was a bit clingy with Robert and had called him Daddy a few times -- though it wasn't quite consistent. It made Robert's face light up every time, though, and Aaron loved seeing it.

There have been a few other meltdowns, as they had to be parents. They had to say no. They had to make him eat his vegetables, though Robert was getting creative at making them for Seb. And there were the nightmares and him waking up screaming Rebecca.

It broke their hearts.

Every night they hoped they wouldn't happen.

They'd found a therapist for Seb. He'd had one appointment so far, so it was a long road. She seemed nice, though, sharp. They liked her, and they thought Seb did as well...

Aaron chewed on his lip. It wasn't going to be easy, but somehow they manage. But they were getting to the end of the week, and next week was going to be something new. They both had to go back to work, Seb would have to go nursery -- they weren't quite sure how'd he handle it all. Both of them were half ready to wait longer.

Maybe introduce Seb to the rest of the Sugdens first? Aaron kept chewing on his lip -- one thing he couldn't do was count on his own family. Sarah's warning hadn't really surprised him, but he couldn't believe at the same time they were bothering her with it. Why wouldn't they just listen to him? He hadn't listened to Sarah though, he'd kept avoiding their calls...

He didn't care what lies they believed. He knew the truth. And he hated telling them about Seb was going to just make it worse -- and that they wouldn't see how amazing Seb was and how he wanted to do this...

With Robert.

He wanted a life with Robert.

He'd been scared, he still was, but it was worth it. Seb was worth it. He was perfect. He was amazing and sweet, and it'd been easy to love him -- and it was so much like how he loved Robert. Intense, scary, but so simple and easy.

He wished he could share this with his mother. That she'd be happy he was settled and had a family -- she'd always said that was what she wanted for him. Yet apparently, it only was alright if she approved of man...

"Hey?"

He blinked and saw Robert standing in the doorway.

"Your mum?"

Aaron nodded.

"She called again. It's late?"

"No, I just..." He sighed. "Was thinking maybe we hold off on work and him going to nursery until after he gets to know Sarah, Vic, Adam, and Julie?"

Robert nodded. "Yeah, been thinking that...I can probably take more time off."

Aaron nodded.

"But?" Robert sat down next to him, hand on his thigh.

"Just hate that we can't count on me, mum and Paddy."

"Maybe they'll come around," Robert said.

Aaron stared at him.

"I'm just..." Robert sighed.

"You should be mad."

"I am mad," Robert said. "For you."

Aaron smiled at that.

"It'll work out, somehow, alright? We'll figure it out....we've been figuring this out."

"He called you Daddy at dinner."

Robert grinned. "Never knew that could be amazing."

"It is," Aaron nodded. "You are with him."

'Me, you should see you..." Robert fell back on the bed and pulled Aaron with him....they laughed and turned, eye to eye. Aaron bit his lip. Robert kissed him to stop it...

"I just want what's best for us," Aaron said.

"Me too."

"Us is him too."

"I know..." Robert frowned.

"What is it..."

"Knee is bugging me. I think I might have tweaked it playing monster."

"You poor old man."

"Shut up...." Robert laughed and kissed him again.

And again.

They moved up the bed, Robert ended up above him, pinning him down, and he was halfway through unbuttoning Robert's jeans when they heard a hard banging on the door.

"That's going to wake...." Robert cringed as Seb started to crying.

"It's past ten. Who the hell is it?" Aaron muttered as they both headed to Seb's room.

They paused at the door.

"I'll see who it is," Robert said. "You check on him?"

Aaron nodded and hurried into Seb's room.

He was sitting up, hiccuping, but seeing them had stopped his crying. "It's noisy, Awon."

"I know, bud... Your dad is going make it quiet," Aaron handed him a tissue. "Blow your nose."

Seb blew his nose.

The banging stopped.

"You think you can fall back asleep?" Aaron asked.

"Story?" Seb asked.

Aaron nodded.

"Cain, what the hell, you can't just...." Robert yelled.

Cain? Aaron stood up as Cain appeared in the doorway, having stopped seeing the light. Aaron sighed as his uncle stared into a kids' room, saw Seb in the bed and him standing near.

"Who is he? He isn't gonna take me away..." Seb asked, tears forming again.

Robert was right behind Cain, though, and he and Aaron said no in unison.

"No way, Seb, no one is taking you away from us," Robert said, sitting on the bed. He looked at Aaron.

Aaron nodded. "He wants a story."

Robert nodded.

Aaron started to walk out of the room.

"Awon is coming back?"

"Of course he is."

Aaron turned. "I'll be back quick as I can."

Seb nodded.

Aaron brushed past Cain and grunted at him to follow him. He stalked downstairs and into the kitchen, Cain behind him. He glared at his uncle. "What're you doing banging at the door."

"Your mum sent me."

"Why?"

"Seemed to think Robert was keeping you held up."

Aaron rolled his eyes. "I've told her over and over we were busy."

"I see that... Going to explain the kid."

Aaron grumbled.

"Aaron?"

"He's Robert's alright," Aaron said. "It was a shock, and it's new, and we just brought him home this week. We needed time."

Cain took that in and sighed. "So he has created..."

"No, he hasn't..." Aaron groaned. "He hasn't at all. Alright, it happened before we really got together, and he had no idea until Rebecca died..."

Cain blinked at that but shook his head. "So, you're just going take that on, someone else's kid?"

"Robert's kid," Aaron said. "And of course I am... And Seb's, Seb's amazing, Cain, alright. He's three, he's smart as a whip, and he needs us."

"Seb, is it?"

"Sebastian."

Cain sighed and sat down. "Alright, tell me the whole story."

"It's late, alright, we've had a long day..."

"If I'm going back to your mum with this, I need the facts."

Aaron sighed.

He sat down.

Cain shook his head.

"Before we really start," Aaron said. "I want it clear that I know what I want, I know who I want, and we have made the choice about Seb together."

Cain nodded.

"It's my life."

"It is," Cain said.

Aaron breathed out in relief.

"Now talk."

Aaron opened his mouth, but Robert appeared at the top of the stairs.

"Aaron, you need to just come back up for a minute... He's afraid the scary man is going take you away...."

Aaron hopped up. "Just I'll be back down when we get him settled."

Cain nodded again.

He hurried up the stairs and ran right into Robert. Strong arms wrapped around him, pulled him into a hug he didn't know he needed. Robert's voice in his ear. "You alright?"

"He'll listen."

"Hope so," Robert said and let go.

Aaron grabbed onto his arm.

"Hey, I'm here, just...Seb."

Aaron nodded. "Let's get him back asleep."

Chapter Text

The portacabin door squeaked open. Aaron kept reading over the contract on his desk and didn't bother to look up. "Ads, they drop off that boiler yet."

"Not Adam."

He looked up and fought down a groan.

His mum smiled from the door and gave a little wave.

He sat up straighter.

"You don't have to like I'm gonna kill ya," Chas whined as she grabbed a chair and pulled it to his desk. She sat down. "But we do need to talk."

He nodded.

"Aren't you at least going to say hi?"

"Hi," he said.

"Aaron…" she sighed.

"What?"

"You always expect the worst from me. It's unfair."

"So, you're not here to make a case against Robert?"

"He has a kid, Aaron. That he never told you about."

"Because he didn't know."

She huffed out air. "So, he says."

"And you wonder why I'm not glad to see ya."

"She told him, and he didn't care."

"Not what happened."

"Of course it is, Aaron. It's who he is. He lies."

"It was who he was, years ago… he grew up."

"I know you don't want to think the worst of him."

"And I know you don't even want to give him a chance."

"Katie's gone. It's all his fault…."

"Katie was making moves on him because she was mad at Andy, and it backfired in her face. In Robert's face. He and Andy still aren't talking, and Katie left because she was the one who messed up, Mum. It's not Robert's fault you lost your best mate."

Chas tutted.

Aaron rubbed his temples.

"He cheated."

"No."

"He was with another woman when he was seeing ya?"

"No. He was with another woman when we were…." Aaron blushed red, but he forced himself to spit it out. He needed it clear. "He was with her when we were just sleeping together, mum. No strings. Both of us said it. Both of us thought we meant it. I did the math the time period he was with Rebecca, I with some other guy — whose name I don't even remember. Remember dumping him, though, and Vic wanting to set him with Robert. We both were with other people. So, am I cheat now?"

Chas made a face. "Still think he's lying about when he knew."

"Ask Sarah."

"Excuse me?"

"Sarah was there when he found out. Ask her if he was lying about being blindsided."

"Mums can't see straight…."

Aaron scoffed. "Look in a mirror then."

"I am tired of this argument."

"Then stop having it, Mum."

She frowned.

Aaron shook his head, and his phone went off. He picked it up, knowing it was Robert. He smiled as a picture came through, Seb with food all over his face, sucking on his thumb and grinning. He never in his life thought he'd be getting pictures like that…

But he liked it.

They'd found their way the past two weeks.

Stumbling a bit.

Both of them having moments of terror.

But they let the other pull them back.

Sarah was a godsend.

His heart hurt as he looked at his own mother. He offered her his phone.

"What?"

"Look at it."

Chas took it and looked.

He watched her.

She made a face, shook her head. "He's cute. Must take after his mother."

"Leave," Aaron mutter.

"What?"

"Leave."

"What?"

"LEAVE," he yelled, knowing damn well she'd heard the first two times.

"You're throwing your own mother out."

"Maybe if you acted like one," he spat out.

Her face fell.

He felt like he'd kicked himself in the gut. They'd gotten past her running off and leaving him with his dad when he was younger. They'd gotten past butting heads from his own anger at being abandoned. Maybe she'd gotten too clingy, maybe she tried too hard, but they'd been okay for a while...

But she just wouldn't stop.

He couldn't deal with it.

"I am your mum, Aaron. And I'm looking out for you."

"He's the best thing that's happened to me… if you don't want to see that, Mum…."

"Robert Sugden."

She made his name sound like a monster.

"Yeah. Not the made-up villain your head, the real person, Mum."

"No. I will not ever accept it."

Aaron stared at her.

"You'll see I'm right. You'll see this best… You can't stick yourself with his kid, with him. It'll end badly."

"Only thing ending badly is this conversation," Aaron muttered, and he started to grab his things. If she wouldn't leave. He would. He grabbed his jacket, yanked it on, and pushed out of the portacabin.

"Aaron," she yelled after him.

He just got in his car and drove off.

Watched Adam walked up to Chas in his rearview window.

Bit his lip the whole drive home.

He walked inside, hit by the warmth of the Mill and the smell of chicken. He stepped in more and realized Robert had his headphones in as he cooked. Seb was on his hip, and he was singing off-key some pop song that was either Kelly Clarkson or Pink…

Aaron hated even knew those were the choices.

But it was perfect.

He blinked, and tears fell down his face.

Robert did a weird dance move that turned him around. He stopped short. He pulled an earbud out of his ear and walked over to him. Seb reached out and touched his face.

"Are you sad?" Seb asked before Robert could.

Aaron inhaled sharply.

He wanted to be angry.

But the truth was.

He nodded.

Seb's arms reached out, and Aaron found himself holding him, but not really because his little arms were around his neck, and he squeezed. "Better?"

Robert's hand was on his shoulder, their eyes locked, and he shook his head no, as he lied to Seb. "Yeah, much."

"Hey, Seb…" Robert took him back. "Wanna go play for a bit in your fort?"

Seb's eyes lit up.

"Alright, Aaron and I need to chat, but Aaron will join you soon."

Seb nodded as Robert put him down, and he ran right to the pillow and blanket fort they'd built him his first week home. Robert watched him settle into it and pick up his toys. Then he turned and yanked Aaron into another hug.

Aaron buried his face into the side of his neck.

Robert's hands went up and down his back. "Only your mum causes that look."

"Her newest mad idea is you knew about Seb all along."

He felt Robert roll his eyes.

"I'm sorry."

"For what?" Aaron muttered.

"Her not letting it go."

"If she just tried to get to know ya?"

"I was awful."

Aaron scoffed. "I know the stories, Rob. From here, from others, from you, and from your mum. You were messed up. You had reasons — good reasons. That are none of her business. You grew up."

"I met you."

"You were already growing up," Aaron said.

"Yeah," Robert nodded.

"I just, I was awful too. She's been awful. I… she's protective, it's to make up for shit, but…."

"Hey," Robert's kissed his cheek. "Come on."

Aaron let him pull him into the kitchen, further away from Seb. He sat him down. "Alcohol or tea?"

"Beer."

Robert got him a beer.

Aaron opened it.

"I hate this," Robert said. "I feel responsible."

Aaron shook his head. "It's her."

"I know that, but… she is your mum. I go spare without mine. I was awful, but I would have been… probably the villain your mum makes up without her."

Aaron snorted.

"I'll just keep trying."

"I hate that. It shouldn't just be you trying… she's gonna make me…" he trailed off.

"What?"

"Choose," Aaron said, but he shook his head. "She's already made me choose."

"What're getting at?"

Aaron looked toward the fort. "We… we're getting used to this…being his…."

"Dads?"

Aaron turned back to look at Robert. "Am I?"

Robert blushed and ducked his head down. "I mean… yeah….unless you're going somewhere?"

Aaron shook his head.

"Then yeah… maybe we should talk about it more?"

"Don't need to, not really, I want that…." Aaron laughed.

"What?"

"Just… never thought I'd do this… when I was terrified of coming out. Though there was no way I'd find a man and want the things I saw couples do… Kids never even entered my mind. But… You. And now him. Crazy, innit?"

"A bit but with you…" he looked over at Seb. "He scares me."

Aaron reached over and grabbed his hand. "You're amazing with him."

Something started sizzling behind them.

"And I'm burning tea…go play with him."

Aaron nodded.

Robert grabbed his hand, though. "Your mum?"

Aaron shrugged.

"We'll find a way," Robert said.

Aaron wanted to believe him.

~~~

Two days later…

Robert hurried into the Woolpack as it started to downpour when he was few feet from the door. He shook his head, hands going up to his ruined hair, and sighed. It was amazing he'd managed to get dressed and ready — he and Aaron were still figuring out logistics now that they had a toddler. A lot of things felt almost too easy, and other things were a steep learning curve.

Like leaving the house looking presentable.

Which hadn't been much of an issue for him until today.

His job was letting him take leave. But he still had other responsibilities. Like his writing courses and a few competitions he was writing for and edits on a story that'd been sent into a literary magazine and gotten accepted…

His mum was helping him out with that. His edits were due by Friday. They had to go through everything today. He looked around, and she wasn't there yet, so he walked over to the bar. Charity was behind it, and she just nodded and gave him a pint.

He took a generous sip and found himself looking for Chas.

Aaron was putting on a brave face, but their last conversation had really shaken him up — he was both mad and sad. More sad, and Seb was picking it up — he kept giving Aaron hugs like it was his mission to make him smile. Robert wanted the same thing.

"Chas here?" he asked Charity.

She gave him a look. "No scenes in my bar."

He held up his hands. "I just want to talk."

She shook her head. "She's just changing a barrel."

He nodded.

Sure enough, she was walking through a minute or two later. She spotted himself almost immediately and got a sour look on her face. Robert clenched his jaw and told himself to be on good behavior. For Aaron. He stood up and walked over to where she decided to stand. Nowhere near him, of course.

"If I could ban you, I would," Chas said.

"Nice…" Robert couldn't help the sarcasm.

"I don't like your face."

"Your's isn't so great with that sour lemon look you picked up from Katie…" he sighed. He was supposed to be trying to make things better.

Chas glared at him.

Robert took a moment. Then he carefully forced her to at his face. "Aaron, he needs ya."

"He's ignoring my calls, my texts, he turns around when he spots me in the street — all because of you."

You. Robert wanted to shout it. "He just wants us to get along. I mean, shouldn't we try?"

"Why?" Chas asked him.

"What?"

"So, you can play me… I know you, Robert Sugden."

"No, you don't."

"But I do… you decided to make Andy's life hell because you could. You used Katie more than once, and even in the end when she saw through you, you still had some hold on her…."

"Because I could…." Robert snapped and sighed. His insides were thorny when it came to Andy. "You don't know the half of it with me and Andy. He nearly killed our mum with a fire…."

"He's apologized for that more over," Chas said.

"Yeah. And I've apologized for everything with Katie. More over…your mum forgave him years ago." Robert said. "I've tried with him. I even tried with her. I know my mistakes, Chas. Do you see yours?"

"What?"

"Look, I'm sorry Katie left town, but that was down to her. I wasn't a part of it."

"You led her on…while with Aaron."

"No, I didn't… no one competes with Aaron. No one can hope to come close to him… He's the love… I love him. And he's amazing, Chas. That I know we agree on. He wants you in our lives, in our son's…."

"OUR SON," Chas's voice went beyond shrill.

He closed his eyes cursed his big mouth.

"You mean the kid you didn't want but got stuck with…"

"What universe do you live in? I didn't know about him if I had…." He sighed. He wasn't sure what he would have done, probably something stupid…but Seb…

He'd take one look at him and fall in love.

Didn't matter when the meeting happened.

"I want my kid, wanted him from the second I found out about him… He's lost his mum. He lost an entire family, and Aaron has taken him on because he loves me. It was a big ask, Chas, but your son is a good enough person it didn't even occur to him not to…

Maybe you should try to be as good as him."

He sighed and turned around. Planning to walk out. But saw his mum watching them. Their eyes met. She gave him half an eye roll. "Let's do our meeting at the cafe," she said.

He nodded.

They really should have chosen there in the first place.

"I suppose that was you trying with her?" Sarah asked.

"I had to... I just… Aaron's not happy."

Sarah frowned. "They'll work it out."

Robert shook his head. "Chas is so stubborn."

"Hopefully, she'll figure out she's causing more harm than good."

"Hope so…" he sighed.

Sarah squeezed his arm.

They sat down and ordered coffee.

Robert took out his laptop and his folder for the story. "So, um, I'm still a bit stuck on how to smooth out the middle section…."

"Wait, wait, priorities," Sarah said.

He gave her a look.

"All your most recent pictures of my grandson?" she held out her hand for his phone.

He laughed but handed it over.

"Oh, this one of him and Julie is precious…."

"They're thick as thieves, those two, think Vic and I might be in trouble."

"With Sugden genes… it's guaranteed."

He just shook his head.

Sarah put down the phone and studied him.

"What?"

"When are you going to propose?"

"I don't know yet… I had it all planned, but…we're still finding our feet, and Chas…."

"Don't let her stop you, promise."

He nodded and thought about the rings. Still sitting in his car dash compartment. He wanted to ask Aaron. He'd had a few moments as they went about their days, figuring things out, step by step with Seb that he'd wanted to just blurt the question out…

But he wanted to put in the effort.

Aaron was worth the effort.

Chapter Text

Seb slept, curled on his side, hugging a dinosaur toy that Robert didn't recognize, and he shook his head a bit at Aaron. Not that he minded at all. Seb asked for two stories and finally fallen asleep just as the last one was ending. Robert finished the last page anyway, just to be safe.

He had a son.

It still struck him like lightning.

This whole life. This whole person. It felt too big. He gulped.

He couldn't mess this up.

He had to get out of the room.

But he made himself take a minute. He tugged the blankets up further around Seb and left the room. Leaving the door open. He rubbed his face, tried to ignore how hard his heart was beating, and made his way into their bedroom. Aaron was on the bed, car magazine on his chest, mouth open and asleep.

Robert glanced at that time. He hadn't realized it gone so late -- he'd wanted to talk with Aaron. Time seemed to slip by so fast now that it wasn't just them. Before, it felt like they'd owned time. Maybe they still did. It was just different. They were still figuring everything out.

He stripped down, grabbed his trackies, but moved over to Aaron's side of the bed and dropped down to his knees. His bad knee twinging, but he ignored it. He lightly tapped Aaron's shoulder. Aaron snorted and sat up and found Robert. He rolled onto his side and stared at him. "What're you doing?"

"Don't know," Robert laughed.

Aaron yawned.

"Sorry, but you should get undressed and all."

Aaron seemed to notice he was still dressed at that moment. "What time is it? I was waiting for ya?"

"Just past midnight, he wanted two..."

"Stories."

"Yeah, maybe I got caught up in watching him sleep."

"It's cute."

"It's daunting."

Aaron nodded, and Robert knew he got it.

"I miss you," he breathed.

"I'm right here."

"You know what I mean."

Aaron's face turned pink.

Robert stood up, knee creaking, and offered Aaron a hand.

He took it, got off the bed, and stepped into Robert. Really. Because Robert didn't step back. Let Aaron right into his space, against his chest. They stumbled a bit, but Aaron's hands landed on his ribs and Robert's hands on his face...

He kissed him and sighed into it.

Aaron melted into him too, and Robert started to yank and pull on his clothes, and then they were on the bed. Aaron yanking Robert with him and fell back, and they laughed at it...

"Daddy, Awon..." A little voice cut through it.

Robert rolled off of Aaron. It pointed him right at their door. "Hey, bud."

Seb smiled.

"I woke up."

"I see."

Aaron moved off the bed. "You alright?"

Seb nodded.

Robert studied his face, no tears, which meant no nightmare.

"Bad dream?" Aaron asked anyway.

Seb shook his head.

"Thirsty?" Aaron asked.

Seb shrugged.

"Let's get you tucked back in," Aaron said and shot Robert a glance.

Robert nodded.

They tried to tag off.

He watched them leave, then looked up at the ceiling. He hadn't moved from the bed. He let out a groan of disappointment and wondered how people did it? Though the stories were, they didn't? But that couldn't be true, not really...

He shook his head.

Seb had reminded him of something else, though...

He stood back up and made his way back to Seb's room. Only they weren't there. He padded downstairs and found them in the living room. In front of the shadow box, he'd had made for Aaron. Aaron was talking lowly, facts about fossils -- things Robert heard a million times. But he loved listening to Aaron talk about them. He got this look on his face, this softness in his voice...

It was all there as he talked to Seb. Robert noticed Seb had the rock that lived in the middle panel in front of the photograph of their silhouettes on the beach. Aaron used to carry it in his pocket, but he'd put it in there a while ago. Seb was fiddling with it in his tiny hands. As he listened to Aaron.

They were perfect.

"What's up?" he asked softly as Aaron paused.

"He asked to see the rock..." Aaron said. "I showed it all to him earlier today."

Robert grinned. "Dork."

"Says the guy looking for kids versions of Lord of the Rings."

"Can't start too early..."

"THis before or after you gave him that dinosaur?"

Aaron's face flushed. "After."

"I like rocks," Seb added to their conversation.

"So does..." Robert paused before he said, Aaron. Remembering two of the things he'd wanted to talk about. "Aaron. But you need to get some sleep."

Seb shook his head.

He looked at Aaron.

Aaron shrugged.

"Do you want to stay with us?" Robert asked.

Seb nodded.

Aaron smiled. "Alright, put the rock back."

Seb nodded and placed it back in its place.

They walked upstairs, Robert taking Seb as Aaron went to change. Robert settled him smack in the middle of the bed. One his own pillows underneath him and tucked up the covers. Seb grinned. "Big bed."

"Yeah, it is...close your eyes."

"Lights bright."

"It'll turn off soon," he got himself under the covers.

Aaron came back and followed suit on the other side.

Seb looked between them and got what Robert could only call a satisfied look on his face before he closed his eyes. "Night night," he muttered.

Robert and Aaron locked eyes as they settled both turned toward Seb.

"I feel like I just got played," Robert mouthed.

Aaron smirked but nodded.

They watched the little boy fall asleep.

"We should take him to the shore...you two can search for hours."

Aaron blushed.

"It'd be nice."

"Yeah..." Aaron whispered.

"I um... Tried to talk to your mum."

"Went great?" Aaron asked sarcastically.

"No. Then I made it worse..."

"Wouldn't take much..."

"I know, but..." Robert watched Aaron play with Seb's hair... He wondered if Aaron knew he was... "I called him our son," he said softly.

Aaron froze.

"It just came out..." Robert said.

"Oh."

Robert realized he'd looked down, so he made himself lookup. Right into pure blue. "He...um... I was thinking...maybe he shouldn't call you Aaron."

"What?"

"If...if you wanted, he could call you Daddy too, or Papa, or something..."

Aaron stared at him.

"Unless you hate the idea..."

"I love it..." Aaron breathed out fast. "I...just... Surprised."

"Yeah, well, isn't he the biggest surprise..." Robert stared at Seb. "Still not over it."

"You mean it? You want to... I don't know share him?"

"It's not really sharing, is it? We're..." Robert looked away again. "We're in this together, right? You love him...right?"

"Of course I do."

"Then pick what you want..." Robert looked back up, daring too. All he saw was love and maybe fear on Aaron's face. "Daddy Aaron? Papa?"

Aaron wiped at his eyes and sniffed. "I don't...that's....well we've called you Daddy... Papa might be less confusing."

"Yeah..."

"Alright... If he wants."

"We'll figure out what to say to him tomorrow..." Robert said.

Aaron grinned at him, laughed a bit, and leaned over Seb. They kissed softly, and Robert found himself wishing he had the rings -- why didn't he have the rings? They broke apart, and the words were on his tongue anyway...

When Aaron yawned.

"We should sleep. He'll be back up in no time."

Robert exhaled. "Yeah."

"I love ya," Aaron said as he closed his eyes.

"I love you too."

Chapter Text

"Rob…" Vic sighed.

"What?"

"You were interrogating her like she'd committed a war crime."

"What? I'll be leaving Seb with her for hours of the day, and he's been through a trauma."

"And you explained it all. He's attached to you and Aaron. Seems fine though, at the moment, with mum and Julie."

"It's mum, though…." Robert mumbled.

Vic shook her head. "Rob, he'll be fine. Alright. Julie will be there. He knows her. They already have their own little language."

He sighed as he opened the door to his car and climbed in. Vic gave him an understanding look as she pulled on her seatbelt. "Look, I get it. I was a wreck when I had to start leaving Julie with other people. And the situation you're in with him is different, I know. But the nursery is great, the whole village's rugrats go to it. Seb will be fine."

He started the car.

"Will you?"

He laughed at that. "I just…I am going a bit stir crazy."

Vic laughed.

"Most I've been in the cafe, and that was to talk writing with mum."

"Oh, I got my magazine, read the story…."

He glanced at her.

"I could see the farm on the pages, really… feel the memories from when I was kid…but don't know it was darker."

He bit his lip. The story she was talking about wasn't like the one their mother had read when she was a judge in a contest. It was quite as autobiographical. But it was set on a farm, it was about a boy spreading his wings in directions his parents weren't fond about…

The truth was he worked out a lot of things by writing.

"It's a story about escape had to be a bit dark."

"I liked it. It just had me wondering."

"What?"

"You and Dad?"

He shifted.

"You never talk about him, but…."

"Vic…"

"Just, if you ever wanted to… I do think it's great, though."

"What?"

"How you can put pieces of you on the page like that and write these great stories…I'm happy Aaron happened to you."

He smiled at that. "Yeah, never would've entered that contest without him…he… made it okay to admit out loud."

"The two of you are good?"

"We're great," Robert glanced at her.

"Just, you know… Seb. That's a lot of change."

He nodded. "It's…weird… I'm waiting to fuck this up."

"You won't."

"He's a little person. I fucked myself up for over thirty years of my life. Now I have all of his…." He shook his head. "I wasn't living as me until Aaron… that's just a few years. Sometimes I still feel a bit bad being…."

"What?"

"Good…" he made a face.

"Robert, you've always been… good."

"You paused."

Vic just shook her head. "You have walls, Rob, that's all. Aaron tore most down. Doubt even he got all of them."

"Yeah."

"I mess up with Julie, so does Adam. We just do our best."

"Yeah, well… still unsure I'm good at that."

"Don't get in your head… and don't interrogate them tomorrow when you drop him off. They already asked the billion and one questions you had…."

"I only got halfway through my list before you grabbed it."

"They know what they're doing."

"It's just…."

"You're a dad," Vic grinned.

"Yeah, well… you were made to be a mum. Like mum…" he trailed off.

Vic frowned. "Dad was always there when it mattered. I know you two had issues, and…."

"He was there for you. He was there for Andy…" he sighed. "You said my story was darker…."

She nodded.

"That life was for me…" he sighed. "He hated I hated the farm."

"I remember the fights… but he loved us, Rob. And you love Seb. It's family."

"Right…" he murmured. Family?

Vic kissed his cheek. "I will see you tomorrow morning, 7 sharp. We have to get them there before 7:45."

"Maybe Seb's not…."

"It's you who isn't ready. 7 sharp."

He nodded.

She slammed the door and gave him a smile through the window before vanishing.

He moved up the street toward the Mill.

His Mum's car is in Aaron's spot.

No sign of Aaron's car — it looked like he hadn't been able to get at lunch. He'd warned Robert he might not be able to. It was ridiculous to miss him, wasn't it? But it didn't matter he'd seen him all night or that morning. That they'd kissed at the front door long enough that Aaron was late…

Or that Seb yelled that his show stopped.

He opened the dashboard compartment and pulled out the box. He flipped it open and stared at the rings. Heartbeat flying, his mind trying to figure out when and where to do it? How to do it? Should he include Seb?

Should he ask his mum to take him for a night?

A whole night?"

That was far away, wasn't it… He was positive nursery was going to pushing it, pushing Seb. He and Aaron. It was all so uncharted, and Seb still missed his mum. Still seemed to freak out if he didn't see them… He'd cried the first time Aaron couldn't get home for lunch earlier in a week. They'd face-timed Aaron, calmed him down, but he'd been quiet until Aaron got home…

But the therapist thought it best to get him back into the real schedule. That they not be home all the time. That life had to go forward and on. Robert sighed and wondered if he could get used to tears.

He stared at the rings. No. He couldn't do it soon, no matter how he cut it — and Aaron deserved romance. He deserved whisking away and all of Robert's attention on him. He wanted Aaron to know to feel how important he was to him.

He couldn't do that without it being just them.

They were just as important as Seb.

Balance.

That shit was going to be hard.

~~~

He was barely inside the Mill door when Seb attached himself to his leg. "Gamma told us a story about wobbits."

"Wabbits?" he asked.

"He means rabbits," Sarah laughed.

"Uncle Robert?" Julie ran up to him with a piece of paper. "I drew this for mummy. Do you like it?"

"As long as it's not hobbits," Robert told his mum. He picked up Seb and Julie's drawing at the same time. It was lopsided heart — at least he hoped that was what it was, and he smiled. "Your mum will love it."

"I drew pictures too."

"Did ya?"

"For Papa and you," Seb pointed toward the kitchen table.

"Yes, for Papa…" Sarah said with a smirk.

Robert felt his cheeks heat.

"Gamma, where are they?" Seb asked, and Robert put him down since he was squirming. He grabbed two pieces of paper. "See."

Robert took them and looked at gray blobs. "Huh…"

'It's your ossil."

He grinned as he got it and looked behind him at the shadowbox and the rock. He squinted at the blobs. "It's perfect…let's put these on the fridge."

"MINE TOO."

"You have to give to your mum, sweetheart," Sarah smiled at Julie.

Robert walked with Seb to the refrigerator and pointed at their magnets. "Which should we use for the drawings?"

"The purple rainbow…." Seb pointed to the bi flag, where it sat with the rest of the magnets that he couldn't reach.

"Good choice, I'll use that for mine…."

Seb pointed to blob number two.

"And for A.. Papa Aaron."

"Papa Awon is the dinosaur, of course."

"Of course…" he set it up.

"Alright, kiddoes, nap time," Sarah said.

"Do we haffta?" Julie asked.

"Yes…" Sarah laughed. "Seb."

"But Papa Awon isn't here."

Robert went down to his knees. "We talked about this. He can't always get home from work to see us."

"And tomorrow you've gotta go to work?"

"Yeah," he grabbed Seb's hand. "But you'll see us before you know it."

Seb made a face.

Robert clenched his jaw and looked at Sarah.

"Come on, Seb, nap time. Papa will be home when you wake up."

Seb nodded.

Robert grabbed him and kissed his head.

"Me too," Julie yelled.

He kissed Julie's head and pulled her pigtail.

Sarah took them upstairs.

He sighed and sat on the back of the couch.

Sarah gave him a knowing look as she came downstairs. "It has to be done."

"Still sucks…what if he gets too upset?"

"You'll probably leave work and get him. Or Aaron will. Or you both will… but you have to live your lives. He needs to live his too. It won't be easy, but he'll learn you two aren't going to leave him."

"Bex never planned to…." Robert sighed.

"Yes, he learned that too young…." She touched his face. "Like you did."

"He at least has memories…I hope he can keep them."

"I think you'll help him with that," she smiled. "So…Papa Aaron."

He blushed.

"Did you also propose?"

"What? No."

"You asked him to co-parent…."

"I never asked him to co-parent… He just did. He just has… it was just right, alright, plus I'd opened my big mouth to Chas and called him our son. It just…it was right."

"Of course it's right….so is you two getting married."

"I know…" he sighed. "Do you really think he'll say yes?"

"No doubt, and you shouldn't have doubt."

"I don't…not really…I just, it's a lot, and he's never even brought it up. Not even now."

"Sweetheart, maybe it's just not on his radar. But he'll say yes, it's you… I see you two together."

"Just… sometimes afraid he's going wake up and think it's all too much. Seb… god, I've asked him to do so much."

"He chose it, already, Robert."

"Still… what if he's just doing it for me, and that's not enough?"

"Where is this coming from?"

Robert sighed. "Fear?"

Sarah hugged him. "Look, I know this isn't easy for you… especially with how awful things got between you and Jack. But you're amazing, Robert Jacob Sugden, and Aaron knows it. And he knows that kid is too because Seb is… like all my grandkids amazing."

"Most amazing…" Robert whispered.

"A Gamma takes no sides…he should meet Jack and Sarah."

"I barely know Jack and Sarah."

"You and Andy…he's getting better. Could you consider trying to get on?"

"How did you…." it flew out before he could stop it. The question he never asked her.

"Because he was foolish and young, and Jack put him in a horrible position he wasn't ready to handle. Because he's my son… I chose him, as much as I chose you, Robert."

He closed his eyes and nodded. Her answer not all surprising him. He knew. Because he knew her. "I just…"

"What?"

"He almost made me lose you," he whispered.

Sarah hugged him tighter.

"I just…losing you would've ruined me."

"I'm right here."

"I know."

"Try. Please?"

"I'll…think on it."

Sarah nodded and kissed his cheek. "I need to go, Adam texted. He and Aaron should be here in about an hour. That meeting ran long, and then they had to pick something up."

"You've got this, Robert."

He nodded and told himself to believe her.

"And ask him, already," she winked and darted out the door.

He felt like his head was too full.

~~~

"Wow, this place is a mess…." Adam laughed.

Aaron walked by him and saw toys strewn everywhere, and opened crayon box spilled over on the kitchen table and paper everywhere. He stared at it all, surprised Robert hadn't already cleaned up a bit…

He was such a neat freak.

"Begs the question though, where are the two little terrors."

"And Robert?" Aaron muttered, and he headed for the stairs. "Probably up in Seb's room."

"Go on, got a text from Vic…." Adam waved his phone.

Aaron hurried upstairs. Seb's door was half-closed, so he pushed it open and found Robert with a tiara on, sitting next to a bunch of stuffed toys, with a tiny empty cup in his massive hand.

"A Giant Princess came to tea," Julie said.

Robert just glared at Aaron.

Aaron smirked at Robert — to annoy him. But really, the sight just made him love Robert more. It wasn't even the first time he'd seen him and Julie. And he'd been watching him and Seb for weeks now. Studying them together, watching their father and son bond grow…

And wondering if he was growing one with Seb himself. A parental bond. A connection that went beyond things like blood. He wanted it. He wanted it deeply enough it did scare him. He wanted to be responsible for a little life.

He glanced to see Seb was old cold on his bed. He'd hadn't slept through the night much — again. He sighed, the doubt he felt about sending Seb to nursery starting tomorrow hitting him again. Like a brick wall. He was scared, worried, unsure. He didn't know what he was doing. Neither of them did.

But they were told they needed to get — well, they'd never had a normal with Seb. That was what they had to create, and it couldn't be the home with Seb all the time.
"Don't start," Robert's voice broke through his thoughts. Reading him perfectly, as always. "I've been through with Vic and my mum."

He nodded. "Ads is downstairs."

"Daddy's here?" Julie asked.

"Yeah, Princess," Aaron smiled at her.

Julie hopped up, looked around, grabbed the tiny little bag and two of the stuffed toys. "Seb can keep my stuff. I'll be back…" she said, all business-like.

Robert smirked and picked her up. "Fly you down?"

"YESSSSSS."

Aaron laughed.

"He kicked off the blanket…." Robert said as he passed Aaron.

"Like father like son," Aaron murmured, and he went over to the bed.

He started to pull the blanket up when Seb's eyes opened. His face lit up. "Papa Awon, Gamma said you'd be here."

"Gamma's always right," Aaron smiled, a bit too wide, but he couldn't help it. He wondered if his face looked lit up to the little boy. They'd asked Seb the minute he woke up the other night if he wanted to call Aaron Papa. That he was just as important to Seb as Robert was…

And he'd just nodded.

And started calling him papa.

Like it was normal.

It felt extraordinary.

"Where is Ju…" Seb asked, looking around for Julie. He was always doing that, looking around for people that were missing that'd been there. "And Gamma?"

"On their way home."

"I see Ju tomorrow, right?"

"You do, mate."

"When you and Daddy are gone?"

"Just for a bit."

Seb nodded. "And Gamma always comes back."

"Always." Aaron kissed his head and tucked him in… Seb drifted back to sleep. He watched him for a minute, then headed downstairs. Robert was cleaning up the toys. "Ads leave?"

"Yeah, Vic had a shopping list…." Robert started dropping toys into the chest they'd gotten. "We need to get a bigger chest. How did we double his stuff so fast?"

"It's Julie's too."

"It was always Julie's, too…" he held up a huge rabbit. "Mum bought this today, I think."

"It's hard not to…." Aaron laughed, and he went to the kitchen. "I'll start up something easy for tea… spag bol?"

"Yeah."

"What's this?"

"Oh, he drew those for us. It's the rock."

You have a son who draws you blobs. Aaron stared at the paper and felt his eyes tear. He sniffed as he felt Robert's chest against his back, felt his arms go around him. He melted into Robert, let his weight take his, and closed his eyes. Just inhaled them…

But…. "It's weird."

"Do you not…" Robert's voice was small, insecure. He started to pull back.

Aaron grabbed Robert's hands to keep them connected. "I love it, don't be daft. It's just weird. He's just...agreed to me…he just accepts me."

"Feel that too… he doesn't know us. But he…likes us," Robert sounded as baffled as he felt.

"Yeah."

"I hope it's because he knows I love him….we love him."

Aaron nodded.

"I really need him to know I love him…." Robert inhaled sharply.

Aaron turned around in his arms and caught his eye. "You won't be Jack."

"How are you so sure?"

"I believe in you."

Robert's expression softened, and he shook his head.

"I believe in you," Aaron repeated.

"You too," Robert whispered in Aaron's voice, and it was his turn to feel… unworthy.

Robert shook his head. "If I have to believe you."

Aaron nodded and nodded again. "We won't be them. I refuse to be my parents too. My dad just vanished because he never cared, and mum…I want to hope she'll come around."

"I'm sorry, I probably made it worse…."

"I wouldn't know. She's not talking to me…for the moment. I will get hell for not reaching out sooner or later….like it's my fault." Aaron hated how much it hurt…

Robert yanked him into a hard hug.

Aaron buried his face into his chest and pushed his mother why — she couldn't be his priority right now. Seb and Robert were his priority.
"We ready for tomorrow," he murmured.

"No," Robert grumbled. "But we do it anyway."

Chapter Text

R: Do you think he's alright?

R: Should I call them at lunch

R: He seemed alright when we left, yeah?

Aaron bit his lip and leaned against the bumper of the car he was stripping. A part of him wanted to tease Robert for being a ridiculous over-bearing parent, but the truth was he'd forced himself to not look at his phone for the past hour — afraid he would call the nursery himself to check on Seb….

He was relieved there were no messages from his teachers. Sort of. He wouldn't have minded an update or something to know Seb was alright, being on his own…

Well, not on his own.

But without them.

He bit his lips harder.

"You alright?" Jimmy King was standing in front of him. They'd rented out a desk in the portacabin to him for his haulage business. Aaron nodded. "Just uh, Seb's first day at the nursery… me and Robert trying to get back into our usual schedule, well closer to it anyway. Instead of holed up at home… Kind of miss it."

He felt awkward as it all spilled out. It wasn't like him to talk to people.

But Jimmy just nodded. "First time is the hardest. By the third kid, you can't wait to toss them at someone else for few hours, anyway."

Aaron nodded.

"Lot to take on," Jimmy said.

Aaron shook his head before Jimmy finished the sentence. He kept hearing that but not once had he felt it. "Not really."

Jimmy nodded. "Suppose my Nico would say the same about our Carl."

Aaron nodded and thought about Sarah, talking about loving Robert before she loved Jack. "Feel like I got lucky, too…" he sighed. "Which feels horrible to say when his mum's dead."

Jimmy made a face. "Terrible tragedy that."

"Yeah…we're doing what we can."

"It's a good thing… I'm heading to the cafe. Want me to bring anything back?"

Aaron shook his head. "Nah, mate, ta, though."

He watched Jimmy leave and looked back at his phone.

R: I'm being a shitty tutor right now.

Aaron laughed as he typed.

A: I'm sure he's fine, we'd have heard, right? We made it clear.

R: Wishing I'd asked for hourly updates — think they'd do that?

A: You're mad.

R: This is…torture.

A: Dramatic.

R: You aren't wondering?

A: Of course I am…and I'm worried. But no news is probably good news. And it's just a few more hours, then you pick him up.

R: Want us to stop by the cabin?

A: Yes.

~~~

Robert dropped his phone onto his desk as he finished texting with Aaron. He sighed and looked at his appointment list, and pulled out the appropriate books. He wasn't at all focused on doing his job, though — and he really did love doing this, helping people out, then going home and writing…

He'd been having trouble finding time for that, lately, though, and he knew he would have to figure something out. He loved spending time with Seb, though, but he was feeling a bit…

Itchy about not having written and a bit slow. Like it was messing with his ability to think clearly because he had words stopped up in his head. He needed to find a way to make time.

But…

He looked at his phone. Nothing from the nursery.
He was fine. Seb was fine.

He'd been fine when they dropped him off, mostly because he'd seen Julie and toddled right up to her. The two of them chattering at each other instantly — he'd watched Julie take Seb's hand s the two of them headed in. While he and Aaron were talking with the teachers…

Or he'd tried too.

He couldn't stop watching his son.

He and Aaron hugged him goodbye. Promised if he needed them, they would rush back for him. But Seb just nodded and asked if he could play now…

Robert shook his head — Seb was fine. He was settling in with them. His best friend was Julie — two little cousin peas in a pod. He needed to stop stressing…

He might as well stop breathing.

His student walked in, and he forced himself to focus on him. It was Matt. He was redoing a math course for the fifth time. He'd come in thinking he was worthless because he couldn't get the material…

Robert promised to help him.

He had to focus.

There was just one more student, and then he was going to pick up Seb.

~~~

Seb had glue in his hair.

As did Julie.

And apparently, a few other students.

The teacher, a young woman with bright pink hair, was apologizing to him and Vic. Explaining the glue fight broke out before they could control it. Both Seb and Julie were grinning, though his son was practically beaming…

Robert knelt down and tugged at his hair. "You're a mess."

"WE WON!"

Robert blinked.

"Again, I'm sorry," the teacher said.

Vic was just laughing, though, as she picked up Julie, who was chattering about how they'd won.

Seb poked at Robert's nose. "Where is Papa Awon?"

"After I get you cleaned up, we'll go see him, yeah?" Robert laughed. He picked him up and turned to the woman. "He was alright today, besides the glue fight?"

"Yes, Mr. Sugden. He is very bright and gets along with everyone. There were no issues."

He let out a breath he'd been holding and nodded.

He and Vic headed out.

"I told you," Vic said.

"I know, just… does it get easier?"

"Leaving them?" Vic asked. "Never."

He nodded.

"Coming over? We can risk given them a bubble bath together?"

"Nah, I need to drop stuff at home, and I promised Aaron we'd head up to the cabin…."

Vic nodded.

"Um… does soap get glue out?"

"Not sure, I'm going to google it," Vic said. "Just be thankful it wasn't glitter."

They got into their separate cars.

"Daddy?" Seb asked as Robert strapped into his seat.

"Yeah?"

"I don't want a bath."

Robert tried not to smile. "Sorry, bud, but have to."

Seb pouted.

Robert kissed his head.

It was a short ride home, but he frowned when he got there because Chas was loitering around their front door. He sighed as he got out of the car. She clocked him, but he ignored her and walked around to get Seb. He wasn't going to deal with her until she forced him to…

He was hoping she'd see there was no Aaron and leave.

Chas cleared her throat as he walked by her, Seb and his bags in hand. He juggled to get out the key and unlock the door.

"I could take…."

He stopped and just looked at her.

"A bag…" she said awkwardly, but her eyes were on Seb.

"I've got it."

"Hi!" Seb yelled at Chas, practically into Robert's ear.

Chas looked a bit panicked, but she looked at him and smiled. "Hello."

"Who are you?"

"I'm Aaron's mother."

Seb's face scrunched up, and he stared at her. Then he looked at Robert. "Nana's your mummy?"

Robert nodded.

"Are my Nana too?"

Robert bit the inside of his cheek not to laugh at the look on Chas' face.

"I just need to talk to your father."

Robert frowned at that.

"Papa Awon isn't here."

Robert glanced at Chas and immediately looked away because he was bout to lose it. He pushed into the Mill, dropped all his stuff unceremoniously next to the door, and started up the stairs. "If you want to talk, follow me. I've gotta get him in a bath."

He was amazed she did follow.

He went into their bedroom, walked into the bathroom, and put Seb on the counter. "Be still, alright. I don't want ya to fall."

"Bubbles?" Seb asked.

"Of course," Robert ruffled his hair and got his watch caught in the glue. "Ugh."

Seb giggled.

"Robert…" Chas was the door.

He looked at her.

"I would like a word."

"Then do it, Chas…I really don't have time to stop."

She frowned.

Robert forced himself not to roll his eyes.

"I want you to stop keeping my son from me."

"I'm not."

"You are."

Robert just shook his head as he checked the temperature of the water.

"You can't keep him from his family."

"Again, not me."

Chas sighed. "Who is it then?"

"Uh, you," Robert stared at her.

Chas frowned.

"She makes weird faces," Seb said.

Robert pursed his lips not to laugh. "Nana Chas…" he said a bit too loudly. "Has a bit of trouble realizing Papa Awon is his own person."

"I do not…."

Robert sighed and looked at Seb. "Look, I've gotta get him in this bath."

"What is all over him?"

"I WON A GLUE FIGHT!"

Chas stared at him and her mouth quirked in a smile before she hid it.

"Chas?"

She frowned. "So this is him?"

"My son, you mean."

Chas nodded.

"Sebastian, Seb…this your Nana Chas. She's a bit slow."

Seb giggled.

Chas sighed. "He's… quite happy."

"We hope so," Robert said.

"Aaron insists you didn't…."

"Cheat? Yeah, because I didn't."

"And that woman Paddy saw you with?"

"One of my students."

"And the jewelry box."

"A necklace for my Mum… which you know," he said easily — god, he loved his mother.

"I want Nana Chas to play with Bobo."

"What?" Chas said.

Robert was again trying not to laugh. He turned and picked up the bath toy — a giraffe that Seb had named Bobo for unexplained reasons and handed it to Chas…. "Only if Nana Chas wants to, buddy, she might be busy."

Chas stared at the toy, at Seb, and at Robert. She then looked around. He wasn't sure what she was really looking at it. Their bathroom was a bit of a mess, but he was too exhausted with her to care what she thought. Aaron had unopened shaving cream by his sink, they both had some clothes, towels, and stuff haphazardly thrown about, and he'd left his glasses on the counter that morning…

Which was why he had a low-grade headache right now, which Chas was making worse.

"I'll leave you to it," she said and handed Seb the toy.

Seb took it. "Bye-bye Nana Chas."

Chas stared at Seb. "Bye," she said softly before leaving.

Robert shook his head. His phone chirped. He expected it to be Aaron, wondering where they were. He hadn't had a chance to text him yet…

But it was Vic with instructions on how to get the glue of Seb's hair.

"Alright, Glue fight champion, let's get you cleaned up, then we can see Papa Awon."

~~~

Aaron jumped up when the portacabin door opened, expecting Robert and Seb, and instead found himself looking at his mother. He hated how disappointed he felt at seeing her — it hurt. But she just wouldn't budge an inch on anything…

His phone went off as she said his name. He ignored her for it and opened the text from Robert, expecting an explanation for why he was running late. He hoped it wasn't because Seb had trouble at the nursery.

R: Seb got in a glue fight…he and Julie won. He's smug about it. I'm cleaning him up, then we'll be there. Your mum stopped by. It was… odd, and Seb started calling her Nana…it was kind of awesome. Tell you more later.

Aaron blinked at the text.

"Aaron," Chas said.

He turned around. "You've met Seb."

She blinked. "He works fast."

"He doesn't keep things from me."

"I was in the Mill."

"He let you in?"

"Into my son's home… why is that bad?" Chas asked, her voice squeaky.

"Since when do you see it as my home…."

Chas held up her hands. "It was…homey."

Aaron stared at her.

"Toys, clothes, DVDs, those video games, all tied up with Robert things too… it was… a home."

"I know."

"And…. He's cute. Seb."

"I didn't think you meant Robert."

"I don't like him."

"That's clear."

"I can't help that…."

"Actually, you could."

Chas sighed. "I don't… I miss you."

Aaron chewed on his lip.

"Do you miss me at all?"

"Of course, I do."

"Then why can't we…."

"Why?" Aaron sighed. "You, that's why. And Paddy. You have to stop making up things and seeing the worst."

"He calls you Daddy."

"Yeah."

"I just want you to be careful. He isn't really yours."

Aaron shook his head. "We're going circles again, mum."

"I'll try, alright… I… He's a real little boy, I see that now and… I get you couldn't turn your back on that. And alright, maybe Paddy and I were wrong about him cheating…."

"It's not a maybe."

"Fine. We were wrong."

Aaron blinked.

"I just don't trust him."

"Could you try to let him earn it then?" Aaron half wished he hadn't said it… he wasn't sure he could trust her with Robert. As much as he wanted to.

"I…" Chas sighed. "I don't… you have a home, and you've taken on this child. I don't know. Seeing it made it feel…something more solid, I guess. It's… I've just always wanted you to have a home, security, stability…."

"I do."

"It looked a bit like that. It's just hard to trust him…."

"You don't know him."

"I…" Chas shut her mouth. "I won't argue."

Aaron frowned. "Mum, what are you trying to do."

"Make an overture.'

"Of?"

"I'll try."

"You've said that before."

"I'll try harder."

Aaron frowned.

Robert and Seb walked in behind her, and Robert blinked at her.

Seb grinned. "Hi, Nana Chas!"

"Just think about it, Aaron…" she said, waved at Seb, and left.

"Aaron?"

Aaron shook his head. He didn't want to deal with it, not right now anyway. He grinned at Seb. "Hey, what's this? I heard about a glue fight?"

"WE WON!"

Chapter Text

~~1~~

Robert kicked at the bedding and grumbled, trying to get his pillow to work with him. But he couldn't find a position that didn't have him fidgeting. It was late — or getting early. He should be asleep. He was exhausted, but his mind was running. And it wasn't even on anything in particular. It was a story he was writing or the way Seb said Aaron's name. His mouth twitched up at the thought — he glanced at Aaron. He was turned toward him, face smushed into the pillow, mouth open.

Dead to the world.

It annoyed him.

He sighed and kicked at the bedding. He felt hot, but not, not really. It was just confining or something. He pushed it off and ended up taking off the shirt he had on and laid flat down again. He blew out air.

"Can't sleep…." Aaron slurred.

"Shit…" he turned to face Aaron. "Sorry."

Aaron's brow furrowed. "Been all week."

"I know," Robert groaned.

Aaron's arm flopped over his stomach, clumsily trying to pull Robert closer.

Robert moved with it, their noses touched. "I just can't settle."

"Been a lot going on," Aaron said.

"I know."

"You've not made time to write."

"Could be it, part of it…." Robert murmured. "You should sleep, though."

"Can't with you squirming around like a fish," Aaron smiled.

Robert bent down, his forehead hitting Aaron's chin. "Sorry."

"No, don't…." Aaron stroked his back. "Maybe I can help?"

Robert felt doubtful.

Aaron smirked at him, his hands landed on his chest, and he shoved him.

Robert found himself on his back again, only now Aaron was straddling him. Eyes dark and still smirking. He stroked Robert's chest and bent down. Robert lifted up to get his mouth on Aaron's faster. He felt like he was tasting something he'd been craving for ages…

The most they'd managed lately were a few exhausted kisses and a lot of cuddling. Not that he was complaining, he loved curling himself around Aaron or being the one curled around. But they haven't gotten more intimate. Aaron's palm's on his chest were the most skin-to-skin contact they had in weeks…

It wasn't like them.

But they were new parents — Robert felt himself smiling into the kiss. They had Seb now, and it was amazing. They just hadn't figured out how to make time for them. Aaron started to drag his mouth down Robert's jaw, his body moving with him…

Robert felt hands on the waistband of boxers, tugging, and he lifted his hips and groaned as Aaron scrapped his teeth, then his beard against a nipple. His hands went into Aaron's hair. "Aaron…"

He sounded too loud.

One of Aaron's hands hit his mouth. "Shh."

But his mouth was on his other nipple.

Robert moaned, tasting Aaron's skin as he did…

It didn't help him stay quiet.

Aaron admonished him again and looked up.

"Don't you dare stop?"

"Then don't be so loud?"

Robert nodded, bit his lip, and shoved Aaron down.

Aaron latched his mouth on his hip, following some trail of freckles that Robert knew he couldn't see in his light — yet he knew they were there. Aaron knew every inch of his body…

And just the right spots.

He grabbed at Aaron's hair hard instead of moaned as Aaron's tongue hit the right spot and one of his hands curved around his dick. He tugged hard, instead of saying his name, and blue eyes looked up at him — only they seemed black in the dark. But he could see the lust.

The love.

Aaron smiled, nearly feral, and bent down, taking the head of dick into his mouth, and Robert felt like he was floating only….

Seb was crying on the monitor.

He groaned as Aaron kept going, unaware of it, his hands left Aaron's hair, and he sat up. Aaron looked up, and Robert cocked his head — and his dick was left hard in the air.

"Shit."

"Go…" Robert mumbled and groaned.

Aaron frowned and got up, not that he was fairing much better than Robert. He gave Robert an apologetic look before leaving the room. Robert sighed and grabbed the sheet, just pulled it over himself and stared at the ceiling.

No sex.

No sleep.

~~2~~

"You look like shit."

"Huh?" Aaron looked up and saw Adam. Hadn't he just been outside?
"You alright, mate?"

"Didn't get much sleep…" he mumbled and thought about Robert. Naked and needy underneath him, and he hadn't gotten to do anything about it. He felt his cheeks flush for thinking about it in front of Adam.

"Seb?"

"Sorta…" he mumbled.

Adam, being Adam, started chortling. "Oh, ah, you and Robert were getting it…."

"No," Aaron said, meaning for it to mean stop Adam, stop. Only its real meaning was very apparent, somehow, and he felt his face got redder.

"Oh… Kid cockblock ya?"

Aaron nodded.

"Get used to it."

"I don't…" he frowned. "I love Seb, I do, but…."

"Yeah?"

Aaron felt his ability to talk go nonexistent.

"Mate?"

Aaron sighed and blurted. "We haven't since he came home."

"Oh…OH." He nodded.

Aaron sighed.

"Just have to be sneaky, make time, take advantage of getting no sleep…."

Aaron frowned at that. It felt more like statements than advice.

"You two used to sneak around all the time. You can sneak it in."

"That wasn't really the kind of sneaking we were doing…."

"Oh, so you never had sex under our noses?"

"Not telling, mate."

"Yeah, yeah…"

Aaron frowned.

"You two will figure it out, mate, all parents do…." Adam got up, slapped Aaron's shoulder. "I've got some errands to run. See ya."

He nodded. He looked at his cold tea. Sighed, grabbed his work gloves, and went back outside to get started on pulling apart an old furnace someone dropped off earlier in the week. He was well into it when he heard tires on gravel. He glanced behind him, expecting it to be Adam, but it was Robert.

He stopped what he was doing and stared.

Robert got out of his car, cocked his head at the portacabin.

Aaron followed him. Utterly confused by his presence. He had students booked all day, and it wasn't a short drive between the center in Hotten and the scrapyard.

He stepped into the portacabin and ended up grunting as he slammed against the door as it closed. Robert's hands on his face and his tongue in his mouth. Not that he was complaining. He felt himself giving back as good as he got — there were times you just didn't ask questions.

Robert swore, and his mouth breathed against Aaron's neck. "What the fuck is your work uniform so bulky…" he was tugging at Aaron's hi-vis.

"Soz," Aaron muttered as he pushed his hands down the back of Robert's jeans, having just yanked off his gloves. "Not like you're underdressed."

"Shit," Robert bit the skin of his neck and yanked more.

They were down to jeans only, Robert on his knees — muttering to himself how it'll be worth it, unzipping Aaron's when there was a thud at the door behind them.

"Aaron mate, you lock it…."

Adam.

They swore. Got dressed. Aaron felt bright red, and Robert was pink.

When they opened the door, Adam took one look at both of them and started laughing.

Robert gave Adam the finger as he left.

Aaron sighed as he watched him drive off.

~~3~~

Robert winced as he stuck his leg up on the table, then put an ice pack on it. He'd, of course, managed to wrench his bad knee in the portacabin. And it would've been worth it if bloody Adam Barton hadn't existed. He leaned back on the couch and sighed.

He was tired.

He was hungry.

He hurt.

He picked up his phone. There were no texts from Aaron. He was supposed to be on his way with takeaway. He could at least get some food out of the equation, he thought…

He might never have sex again.

He grabbed his glasses and a magazine on writing — another thing he might never do again — and started to read. He was grateful. Vic still had Seb for the moment. He'd needed a bit of time to wallow, he supposed. But the kids had conned her into making the cookies. Which meant Seb would be hopped up on sugar when he got home…

But he was adorable.

He and Aaron would deal.

But for now, he had a respite.

The door opened. Aaron came in with the takeaway bags of Italian food. It smelled amazing, and he felt his stomach growl. Aaron glanced around, his face twisting up in concern. "What happened?"

"Wrenched it earlier…." Robert couldn't stop himself from smirking.

"Idiot," Aaron said as he took the bags to the kitchen. "Where's our little monster?"

"Still with Vic… she made cookies with them. He'll be all hopped up."

"Thanks for the warning…I'll make our plates. Beer?"

"Actually, wine, will ya… there is a bottle of white open."

"Will do."

Robert went back to his reading, liking the sounds of Aaron behind him taking care of their food. It felt domestic and right, and he found himself missing Seb. He was about to look at the time, to see when Vic might be back with him when Aaron was sitting down next to him. Plates of food, two glasses of wine, and he smiled. "Wine?"

"Felt like being fancy," Aaron laughed.

They kissed, soft, chaste, but Robert felt the spark and longing for more. His hand curled around Aaron's jaw, and their eyes met. Aaron's expression was soft, open, and he reached up and pulled off Robert's glasses. He smiled as they ducked into another kiss…

A part of him was whispering that they shouldn't get carried away.

But he didn't care when Aaron climbed into his lap. He didn't care when he heard the ice pack on his leg fall to the floor as he moved his leg off the table because Aaron was tugging off his shirt. All he could think about was returning that favor…

"OH MY GOD…You two, THE KIDS."

He'd never hated his little sister more.

To be continued….

Chapter Text

His ears were ringing. He never knew his sister's voice could get quite so… he wasn't sure the word for it. She was still going on and on, Julie standing by her leg staring up at her mother. This look on her face, and Robert wondered if his niece was also wondering how her mum's voice was doing that…

"You'd think you've never had sex before, Vic," he said.

"Rob…" Vic looked at Julie to him.

"But calling me a pillock in front of her is alright?"

Vic opened and closed her mouth.

"You know, I'm seriously doubting no one's ever walked in on you and Adam."

"Not with my daughter and nephew in tow."

"We messed up, alright. Next time I'll lock the bloody door."

"Next time, no next time, you can't have…" she lowered her voice. "Sex in the living room anymore, Robert."

He threw up his hands. "Whatever…can you just finish lecturing me, so I can see my son?"

Vic huffed out some air.

"Uncle Robert?"

He looked down.

"Can we get ice cream soon?"

He grinned at her. "Yeah, how about this weekend? We can show Seb the duck pond."

"There is a duck pond?" Vic asked.

"No trying to figure out where Vic."

She rolled her eyes.

"Yay," Julie said and hugged his leg. "Uncle Robert?" she looked up at him again.

"Yeah?"

"Don't worry about Mummy yelling. She never stays mad long."

He picked Julie up and nodded. "I know. She's a big ole softie."

Vic huffed out more air and took her daughter from him. "No more fun time in the living room."

"No more funtime, more like…." Robert muttered, but he basically shoved them out the door. He closed and locked it and made a note to keep it locked in the future. He ran his hands down his face and started upstairs…

He felt frustrated.

Tired.

And he really never wanted to be lectured by his sister again about when and where he was allowed to have sex.

That was scarring.

He walked to the door of Seb's room and smiled when he saw Aaron helping Seb into his pajamas. His hair was still a bit damp, and he couldn't believe he missed the entirety of bath time. How long had Vic been yelling?"

"Did she only stop because she lost her voice?" Aaron asked.

"I wish… I told Julie we'd take them to the ice cream shop this weekend."

"ICE CREAM?" Seb yelled.

'Not now, bud, this weekend… we're gonna take to a special place."

"Special?"

Aaron tapped Seb's nose. "Very special, we'll tell you all about it when we show you."

Seb nodded.

"Time for bed now."

"I'm not twired."

Robert picked up a few of his books and sat on the other side of the bed from Aaron. "Well, that means maybe we read a whole book."

Seb gave him a big grin. "I want doggies."

"Alright, the story about the doggies it is."

Robert started to read.

Aaron tucked Seb in more fully, then moved to sit next to him over the covers, his eyes on Robert. Robert could feel his eyes on him as he read, and he'd glance up from the words now and again to see both his son and Aaron just watching him…

It made him feel fuzzy.

He felt loved.

He met Aaron's eyes and thought about the ring.

~~~

Robert was in the shower, and all Aaron couldn't think about was being in there with him. Watching waterfall over his shoulders and down his back, having a hand on his hip and he soaped up his chest and kissed the side of his neck…

He closed his eyes, and the highlights of many past showers rushed through his mind and made him shiver. Made him shift on the bed and leaned back into the pillow, and just wish they were together.

But he glanced at the monitor that sat on Robert's side of the bed. Their little window into Seb's room in case of a nightmare or anything else. He wasn't upset by it. Of course not. It wasn't that he minded having to take care of Seb — no, it'd been the best unexpected joy of his life since Robert.

He was just.

Horny.

He sighed and grabbed a magazine, but he couldn't focus on reading it. He kept looking at the bathroom door. Robert was naked on the other side. He wished he was naked too and waiting….

It was always good when one of them waited for the other.

He put down the magazine and picked up the monitor. He put his ear up to it. He could barely make out the quiet snuffly breathing Seb made as he slept. He was sound asleep…

Maybe?

He pulled off the shirt he was wearing, he wouldn't get totally naked, but he could at least give Robert a bit of hint of what he wanted. Maybe if they were quick and not too noisy, they could just…

Be skin to skin.

That sounded perfect.

The door opened, and Robert walked out in nothing but his boxers.

Aaron set up on the bed.

Robert's eyes landed on him, immediately tracked up and down his chest. "Aaron…"

"He's asleep."

"You sure?"

Aaron held up the monitor. "Nothing but quiet breathing."

Robert was on the bed, climbing up from the foot it, over Aaron, pinning him down into the mattress, and kissed his neck. "This what you want?"

Aaron's hand was in his hair. "Not even close to all I want."

Robert scraped his teeth against his skin, and Aaron pulled his hair.

Their mouths found each other.

Aaron curled his legs around Robert's waist and groaned as Robert pressed down into him, the friction was perfect, and they kissed and rutted. It wasn't perfect, far from it, Aaron wanted more, and he shoved at Robert's boxers, got his hands underneath the fabric, and pushed until Robert was under him and his mouth was on Robert's stomach, then his hip…

Edging closer and closer...

Robert's hands in his hair, pulling at it… "Aaron…Aaron…"

His name felt like an I love you.

Robert's voice was raw, deep, needy.

His whole body reacted, and he licked the head of Robert's cock.

Robert's whole body thrust up, unstoppable, but he pushed down with his hands on hips. "Easy," he mumbled against skin before licking him again.

"I need…"

Aaron pulled his cock into his mouth and got lost in giving pleasure, feeling the pull of his hair and his name on Robert's tongue…

Until the cadence changed.

And the tug hurt rather than provoked.

He moved off.

"Seb's crying…." Robert said.

Aaron sighed.

~~~

Sarah rang the doorbell of the Mill a second time as she tried to keep herself under the umbrella. It was pouring rain and freezing, and she really wanted to be home, in front of her fireplace, with a blanket and a glass of red wine. Instead, she was stuck in the village because her car had refused to start, and the garage was already closed for the day.

So she pressed the doorbell of the Mill.

"What?" her son's voice came through on the intercom box, sharp, frustrated, and she rose her eyebrows at it.

"Robert, let me in," she said.

"Mum?"

"Robert, I already look like a drowned rat."

The door buzzed.

She hurried in, the door opened, and she was handed a fluffy blue towel. It was impossibly soft, and she tutted. "How much did this cost you?"

"I don't know, I bought it ages ago…" Robert said. "I'll make tea."

"Thank you."

"Is something wrong?" he asked.

"My car wouldn't start," she said as she wrapped blotted her hair. "I must look a mess."

Robert shook his head. "You could never, Mum."

She smiled and settled into a chair on their kitchen table. "Where are Aaron and my grandson?"

"Seb has a playdate with Isaac. Moira should be bringing him home in the next twenty minutes. Uh, Aaron's upstairs…."

"I was hoping to at least get a Seb snuggle out of this."

"Guess I'm chopped liver."

"Sweetheart, you outgrew snuggles at 8 years old."

Robert laughed and sat down, putting two steaming cups of tea on the table.

She smiled at him and really saw him since walking in. His hair was a wild mess, and his shirt was on inside out, and she was fairly sure there was a love bite on his neck.

His irritation on the buzzer was explained.

"Aaron will be down in a second, and he'll take a look."

"You're going to send him into this weather on his own."

"Yes," Robert laughed.

Sarah laughed.

"Oh… Hi, Sarah," Aaron smiled as he came down the stairs. He looked in better shape than her son, but his hair was a bit on the rough side as well, and she hid a smirk into her tea — she'd gotten quite used to catching them in compromising situations when they were sneaking around.

How they'd fooled so many people, she'd never know.

She watched as she drank, as Aaron silently informed Robert his shirt was inside out, with interest. They knew each other so well, sometimes she caught them moving in perfect sync…

She was a bit jealous of the connection.

She'd never found it.

Jack was the closest, but…

It wasn't what her son had with Aaron.

"Car keys?" Aaron asked her.

She pulled them out of her purse. "Thank you, I'm so sorry about the weather."

Aaron shrugged. "It's fine, worked in worse at the yard."

He walked out, and she turned back to Robert and saw how he was watching Aaron leave… there was a look in his eye that felt nearly wild. And she suddenly remembered a conversation she had with Victoria earlier in the week…

How having to tell Robert, he couldn't have funtime in the living room.

"Robert, sweetheart?"

"Yeah?"

"How are you and Aaron adjusting?"

He gave her a blank look.

"How are you two adjusting to having a three old in the house?"

"Seb's great… he still has an occasional nightmare, but it's a lot better. The last time he woke up crying, it was because of a stomachache. And he begged to hang out with Isaac… doesn't miss us at when he's at nursery."

"Oh, I doubt that… But I asked about you and Aaron."

"We're great, mum…and I know you think I should just ask him, but I want it to be special…."

She smiled as he brought up proposing a rush of affection and pride. "You'll find the right time… but that's not what I was getting at either."

"Ok, then what are you really asking."

"Victoria mentioned she had to remind you that the living room might not be…."

Robert turned beet red. "MUM."

"I'm not asking for details, Robert. But finding time with kids is difficult, and it takes some adjusting…. And asking for help."

"Help?"

"Like maybe asking a grandmother to stay here for a weekend when you and Aaron take some me-time?"

Robert stared at her.

"I'd be happy to."

He blinked and stammered. "Mum… I…. I don't know, leaving Seb for a whole weekend?"

"You just proudly explained how well he is adjusting, Robert. And I'd love some extended Nana and grandson time. I could invite Jack over for a day too."

He started to nod.

"You could do it this weekend."

"I promised Julie and Seb we'd go to the ice cream shop…."

"Well, perfect, I can take all my grandchildren there myself."

"I…guess. I mean, I have to discuss with Aaron."

"Sweetheart, I think you boys need it."

He nodded.

"And maybe while you two are on your own, you could propose."

"Mum…" he shook his head, but he smiled. "Can we just please pretend none of us know why you offered to do this?"

"But of course."

The doorbell rang.

"That'll be Moira…." Robert hopped up.

"Oh good, Seb snuggles," Sarah got up too. "I'll let her in."

"Yep, I'm chopped liver."

Chapter Text

He was soaked by the time he realized he couldn't fix Sarah's car without a part, and he would have just gone and gotten it from the garage, leaving Cain the cost, but he no longer had the key. He thought about trying to break in, but his uncle would kill him, so he made his way back home. He saw Moira driving off as he headed in and waved at her. Inside, the downstairs was quiet, so he took off his boots, coat and grabbed some paper towels to try to dry off a bit.

He was in the middle of that when Robert came down the stairs and laughed. "What?"

"A towel will work better," he muttered and grabbed one that hung by their sink.

"It's the kitchen towel."

"So?"

Aaron scowled, but he let Robert start to dry his hair with the towel. It was nice. A part of him would always find it weird, a bit… strange that it's him this happening too. But then he catches Robert's eye, and he's happy it's him it's happening to…

He smiled.

Robert met it, threw the towel on the counter, and yanked him in for a kiss.

Aaron sighed into it and was immediately back upstairs where they'd left off when Sarah showed up at the door. Him on the bed, Robert over him, strong, solid, and sure. Skin to skin. He groaned as he remembered Sarah was still in the Mill — as was Seb. He pushed Robert away…

Or tried to, anyway. Robert made an annoyed sound and kept kissing him until he let himself slowly back off. "Mum's made a suggestion."

"She has?"

"Yeah…" Robert looked upstairs. "I'm not totally sure about it. But…god…" he grabbed Aaron's by the hips and leaned in, his lips brushing on Aaron's ear as he spoke. "I really need to fuck you."

He gripped Robert's arms because his knees threatened to give out. He blushed deep and glared up the stairs. Then he blinked. "What the hell does that have to do with your mum?"

Robert laughed in his ear and kissed behind it. "She's offered to stay here for the weekend, take Seb and Julie to the ice cream shop, and maybe also do something with Sarah and Jack… anyway, she's offered to stay here for the weekend with Seb while we…."

"We?"

"I get you naked."

"She's upstairs."

"I know," Robert laughed. "But your face."

"Shut up."

"I want to," Robert whispered. "I know it's a lot, and I'm not sure if I can leave him, but…."

Aaron bit his lip. It sounded good. It sounded… he looked at Robert, his hand were still on his arms, wrapped around his biceps. His arms were fantastic, and he wanted to see them braced against a mattress as he tried to not crush Aaron with his weight…

Not that'd he mind that.

"Leaving Seb, though?" he said.

"I know. But… he's great, really, isn't he?"

"Still, what if he has a nightmare?"

"Mum can facetime us…and she'll be here. He loves her."

"Yeah…"

"He kicked me out of the bathroom, said Nana was in charge of his bath."

Aaron laughed.

"He was covered in mud. His clothes are going to be a pain to clean…but that's what we get for letting him have a playdate on a farm."

Aaron snorted.

"One of us needs to drive your mum home. Cain's gonna need to change the fan belt. It's shot."

Robert frowned. "That car is too old...I was going to buy her a new one, but…."

"What?"

"I quit, can't really afford…."

"It's a car, Rob. She doesn't need fancy."

"It's old…have Cain really give it over? I'll pay for all parts."

"You're amazing."

Robert's cheeks went pink. "Yeah… of course."

"You are? Always watching for the people you love."

"Shut up…. So, should we?"

"What?"

"Tell her we accept her offer?"

Aaron bit his lip. "I wanna think on it more."

"Yeah, alright."

~~~

"Papa?"

Aaron opened his eyes, and Seb was at his side of the bed, poking his face.

"Papa?"

"Hi, Seb," he smiled and squinted. The sun was in his eyes a bit, which told him it was still fairly early but at least not too early. "You should be in bed, still."

"But I woke up."

"I see."

"I couldn't find Daddy's face."

Aaron chuckled. Robert was asleep behind him. He could feel his nose against his spine, which meant his face was smushed between Aaron's shoulder blades. "Let's see if we can find it, yeah?"

Seb nodded.

Aaron shifted, which made Robert shift. He rolled toward his side of the bed on his back, making an annoyed face, and opened his eyes. Aaron picked up Seb and plopped him between them.

Robert blinked at his son, then at Aaron, then at the window. "Ugh."

"I couldn't find your face," Seb accused Robert.

"It's right here."

"Is now," Seb said.

Robert looked between them again and nodded. He sounded a bit more awake when he spoke. "I like to sleep cuddled up to Papa."

"You do?"

"I do."

"I like cuddling."

"You do."

Seb nodded.

"Come here," Robert pulled Seb toward him. He faced them both facing Aaron. Who moved to meet them in the middle, facing them and the squished all together. "I say we sleep a bit more."

"What if I can't?"

Robert hummed. "Just close your eyes and see."

"And if not, we'll make Daddy breakfast," Aaron promised.

"Why can't we just do that?"

"Because Daddy wants to sleep…." Robert muttered.

Aaron kicked his shin and ran a hand through Seb's hair. "I think you can. Let's all just shut our eyes."

Aaron watched Robert slip back into sleep, followed shortly by Seb. He felt awake, though, and happy. He was happy. At dawn. If he had to wake up early, he liked it being to Seb's little face. He stared at them.

Robert and Seb.

Same nose.

Mouth parted.

Both drooling.

They were perfect.

~~~

R: Thinking of skipping writing group.

A: You've not been in ages. You should go.

R: I haven't written anything.

A: You have tons of stuff you've probably not shared.

R: Yeah…just…feel out of touch.

A: You need it.

R: I just…

A: Robert.

R: Wow, I heard that. Fine. Maybe I can get tips from the two moms in the group on making time to write.

A: Maybe…

R: Have you thought more about Mum's offer?"

A: Yeah, a lot.

R: And.

A: Let's do it.

R: That's the hope.

"Dork…." Aaron rolled his eyes fondly and read Robert's next message that he'd sort it all out. Of course, you will, Aaron thought, but he wasn't really complaining. The last thing he wanted to do was talk to people about hotels or whatever...

Robert would find them somewhere good. And probably close by…

In case Seb needed them.

He frowned, waffling back to not going, but he shook his head. He needed some time with Robert. Just them. Only them. He missed him. They saw each other all the time, they lived together, but it wasn't really enough…

Would it ever be?

He always wanted more Robert.

"Dork…" he muttered under his breath at himself.

"How is your other half?" Adam laughed, walking into the portacabin.

"Worried about his writing group."

"Why, they don't grade you do they?" Adam asked.

"No…just hasn't had much time to write."

"Yeah, well, a kid will do that."

Aaron felt his cheeks go red. "So, Sarah's offered to babysit so you…."

"Oh, yeah, she's great at that. She gonna take Seb for a weekend?"

"Stay at the Mill, but yeah…well, I said yeah, just…."

"Look, it sucks, you'll miss him, but you'll also have a great time, TRUST ME."

"Yeah?"

Adam nodded. "Maybe I should take Vic away soonish?"

"Well, this weekend, Sarah's busy.

"Wait, you're supposed t take Julie…

"Sarah's gonna."

Adam frowned.

"What?"

"It's not just the ice cream she loves. It's you and Robert."

"Oh…mate…"

"It'll be okay. I'll take her to the scrapyard."

"Vic doesn't want ya…."

"Pssh. Dad's and daughters need their own things. She loves it up here."

Aaron laughed, and his phone pinged.

R: What do you think?

Aaron opened the picture attached and shook his head.

A: Can we afford it? Looks fancy?

R: I still have some contacts, got a room half price…. The beds are amazing.

Aaron frowned at that.

A: You know that how?"

R: Get your head out of the gutter. This is one of the places I stayed before I moved in with mum.

A: What about that other hotel?

R: One, I took ya too…yeah, that one is too expensive.

A: He'll be okay?

R: He'll be with mum, after you, she's the only person I trust with him.

Aaron nodded as he typed his agreement.

R: Alright, I have a student.

A: Group will be good.

R: <3

~~~

His last student was gone for the day, and he leaned back in his chair and winced. That did nothing to help. The center needed better chairs. But he shook his head and opened his phone to the google search he'd run of restaurants near the hotel…

He frowned.

"Too fancy, he'll like the menu, but… will probably be closed for a wedding or something," he muttered to himself and dropped the phone. Maybe he could do it at the hotel? They had a good restaurant downstairs. There were gardens and walkways….

But again, might be booked for a wedding.

It all felt too…

"Typical," he muttered. He wanted it to be special. Aaron deserved… something special and something he'd like. Something that told him Robert knew him and wanted him. For him. He just wanted Aaron.

He was overthinking it.

But he couldn't just pop the question.

It had to be right.

He'd just bring the rings and see what happened. How the weekend went and if the moment presented itself…

He would ask Aaron.

Chapter Text

It was going six o'clock, and Aaron was gritting his teeth, the portacabin phone between his ear and his shoulder, cursing into Adam's voicemail because he was meant to be back to take a car delivery at seven. "Ads get fucking back here," he shouted and hung up. He was meant to be heading home, to have tea with Seb before they left him with Sarah. He cursed again and stomped out of the portacabin to try to see the road up. But not only did he not see Adam's car, he saw no cars.

He sighed, sat down on the steps, and pulled out his cellphone. He tried Adam again, but it went straight to his voicemail. He swore and decided to go over his mate's head. He called Vic.

"Aren't you leaving any minute?"

"Supposed too, where is Ads?"

"He's not there."

"No."

Vic huffed. "You can't reach him?"

"No. Can you call him?"

"Yeah…" she said.

He closed his phone, then slid it back open to look at his home screen. It was a picture of Robert and Seb, asleep together, on the couch. Robert's glasses askew on his nose, and Seb was sucking his thumb. He stared at them for a bit, wanting to memorize it when he realized he could take the picture.

"A kid…" he whispered to himself, shaking his head. He just hadn't seen it coming. He hadn't seen Robert coming either — for months before they gave into it, he kept telling himself it wasn't anything. Him and Robert Sugden? He laughed, thinking about how far-fetched it all felt.

And now a kid.

He'd never thought about being a parent. It felt like something that happened to other people. His whole felt like something that happened to other people. Sometimes he woke up, heart racing, expecting it all to have been some drunk hazed dream he had…

But then Robert would kick him in the shin.

Or Seb would toddle into their room, not wanting to be on his own.

And it was real.

It was his life.

And he couldn't remember who or what he was without them. They only had Seb a few months, and he couldn't remember not loving him, not having him. He was a part of them.

He bit his lip and wiped at his eyes. He was being a sentimental muppet.

Vic called back.

"Find him?"

"No answer, which, he's going to earful on because if I call twice, he's supposed to answer or call back immediately. Maybe he hasn't seen it yet, but I gave him over a minute. He doesn't call back soon, though. He might be on the couch. We have a system for emergencies for a reason. Even if this isn't one…."

"Is too, Robert, and I need this…."

"Your sex life is not my emergency," Vic laughed.

Aaron blushed despite her not being able to see him. "It's not just…."

"Oh, sure it is. I know. I have a baby too."

"Alright, whatever, he calls you back. Tell him to get his arse here. He's supposed to cover."

"Will do."

Aaron sighed and realized it was now past six-thirty.

~~~

He wasn't even surprised when Ellie tore up the practice math test he'd made up for, shredding and crying that she couldn't get this, she couldn't do this. It was only their second week together. It was her first test, and the truth was it was more for him than her. He had to know how much a student was learning and what they were retaining before really digging. And Ellie was going to be hard-case…

He was running late because Ellie was also intense, focused and she'd taken a long time on almost every answer. Not that it mattered now because she was frustrated.

He grabbed t the paper, though, because he'd have to tape it together and just calmly told her to try to breathe and take a seat. She blinked at him. Probably surprised he wasn't shouting at her. Because she'd been shouting at him, lots of things, he was fairly sure she didn't mean.

He knew the tactic.

"Breathe," he said again.

She inhaled and exhaled.

He found as many of the pieces as her test he could and carefully put in in the folder that belonged to her. "We're only getting started."

She blinked.

"You weren't going to pass it."

"Then why'd you give it to more."

"I test more than just the maths. I know this is hard."

"No, you don't. You're good at this. You teach it."

"Fair point."

She blinked.

"Now, I think you probably did better than you think and just failed the last two questions."

"You do?"

"I do. So, what I want you to do is to go home and not think about maths again until I see you Monday."

"Seriously?"

"Yeah, do whatever it is teenagers do…."

"This…a friend did invite me to her house."

"Then go."

"Mr. Sugden?"

"Yeah?"

"Can I go?"

"Go on."

She grabbed her stuff and ran out of the room.

He laughed and checked his phone. Two messages each from Aaron and his mum. He sighed. He knew he was late, but Aaron hadn't even packed yet, and he knew there was a cushion. And he couldn't rush a student. He just wouldn't. He'd tried that to bad results his first few months. The only tests he put a timer on were the practice ones the schools wanted them past, and that was when he was ready to show them they didn't need a tutor anymore.

He called Aaron as he started to pack up his stuff. "I know, I'm running late."

"No, I am."

"What?" Robert blinked.

"Adam, he never showed up, and now the guy delivering the car says he's stuck in traffic."

"Oh."

"That student you mentioned was slow?"

"Yeah, and fed up…I'll tell you later. I'm leaving now."

"I'm stuck here unless Ads shows up."

"Not like him."

"No."

"I'll call Vic."

"Did already. He should've called her back, at least."

"I'll find out."

"Okay."

He shook his head and called his mum as he walked out of his classroom and toward the exit.

"There you are."

"Sorry, I should have warned you I might be late. And Aaron's said he's stuck."

"It's alright. What I made will reheat fine. Might even make it taste better."

"Lasagne."

"Of course," she smiled. "Seb and I are making lists and plans."

"Really?"

"I showed him what a list was. He was quite taken. He checked off make cookies."

"You made cookies?"

"I'm a good grandma."

He laughed. "I'm at my car, see you soon."

He climbed in and remembered he was meant to call Vic. He called her.

"Adam's on his way."

"Hi, to you too."

"Soz… I'm just mad at him. Apparently, he stopped help someone with their car and left his phone in the car. He heard nothing and hadn't realized it was so late — then it was a young woman, so he didn't want to leave her on the side of the road. Which sweet, but he should have called me and Aaron."

"So, he's on his way to the scrapyard."

"Should be there."

"Alright."

"Enjoy the weekend."

"I'd tell you too, but it sounds like Adam's in the doghouse."

"Doesn't mean I can't have fun," Vic laughed.

Robert shook his head as he hung up.

A little under thirty minutes later, he was home. He would've made it earlier, but traffic was awful — whoever was delivering the car to the scrapyard wasn't lying, at least. He pulled into the Mill and smiled when he saw Aaron beaten him home.

His heartbeat sped up at the thought of seeing him.

At the thought of getting him on his own for the weekend.

The two of them skin to skin.

He smiled, his mind wandering to all the things he wanted to do…which led to proposing. He stopped short. His breath caught, and he felt suddenly nervous. And he remembered the rings were in his dashboard. He moved back into the car and started to open it when he heard a slam on the roof of his car. He moved, and Aaron was there.

"Hiya," he said and tried no look like he'd just been doing something.

"Coming inside or what?"

"Just huh…" he was able to fake drop a folder he was holding. "Things got a bit loose…."

Aaron ducked inside, and suddenly he had Robert's briefcase.

Robert kept the folders, looked at the dashboard compartment, and told himself he could grab the rings later.

Aaron beamed at him.

Robert felt himself beaming back. "Hi."

"Hi."

He stepped forward, intending to kiss Aaron when…

"Boys, time for that later. Seb and I have made tea," Sarah yelled.

Aaron laughed and offered his hand.

Robert shifted folders and took it. His mind going to Seb. "I don't know how to say goodbye to him."

"Me either….but he'll show us how."

"Yeah, he's good at that," Robert thought.

~~~

They didn't say goodbye.

There were hugs and tears. Aaron wouldn't deny that but not from Seb. He was looking forward to time with Nana Sarah. And getting ice cream with Julie, and apparently, he had a lego build date with his cousin Jack.

Aaron knew Robert had mixed feelings about the latter since Seb hadn't met Jack yet or Andy, but they were family, and he'd heard Sarah promise Robert it would be okay and saw Robert give in.

Because he loved Sarah.

It felt weird to be on the way somewhere without Seb in the back of the car. He looked in the rearview mirror for a minute. The car seat there. Robert was on the passenger side and fiddling with the radio.

"Nope, my car, my music," Aaron slapped his hand.

"Come on…"

"No."

"Fine," Robert put the station back. "I like this stuff too."

"Your taste is improving."

"Shut up," Robert pressed his hand onto Aaron's thigh.

Aaron felt his insides flip and focused on keeping the car steady.

They glanced at each other.

Smiled.

"I made our reservations for dinner tomorrow night. It's pricey, but the food is stuff you like, and it's by the shoreline. Thought we could go for a walk after dinner."

"Won't it be cold?"

"I'll keep ya warm."

Aaron snorted. "Says that guy who wears a body warmer, a coat, and a scarf."

"I'll be warm… it'll be nice, a walk, the shore? I mean, I know it's not like our first vacation and all, that was too far, but…."

Aaron felt his cheeks pink up and put his hand over Robert's. "I want to, yeah… we have a good track record for vacations. We should keep it, yeah?"

"Yeah…" Robert smiled.

Aaron grinned.

"It'll be perfect," Robert said before kissing his cheek.

Aaron was fairly sure it would be.

Chapter Text

He buzzed with impatience. Aaron scuffed the heel of his shoe on the carpet in the hotel party as he waited for Robert to check them in. The man behind the counter seemed to be moving at a glacial speed. Talking to another employee, doing who knew what else. Aaron just wanted him to focus on Robert.

He was focused on Robert.

His hair was a mess.

Because they'd started kissing in the parking lot.

Teeth and tongue and the horn going off.

He licked his lips and felt Robert on his tongue.

But it wasn't enough.

He scuffed his heel again, and Robert glanced back at him. Impatience in the clench of his jaw and Aaron smirked when he heard his voice raise.

"Don't take another phone call -- check us in. We've been waiting over five minutes."

And finally, the man was focused on Robert. Taking information and clacking keys on the computer. He watched, on his heels now, as Robert was handed a keycard. He bent down and picked up his bags. Robert did the same…

Someone popped up and offered to take them.

"No," they both said. Rude and brusque. They caught each other's eyes and smiled, and walked to the elevator. They got on alone. Just them and their things. Robert pressed a button, and Aaron crowded into his space, let go of the bags, and grabbed his hips. Robert's hands landed on his face, thumbs digging into his cheeks before he kissed him…

Back. Robert kissed him back because he'd already licked his tongue between his lips. They sighed. It was their kiss sigh. He loved that sound. He blushed as he realized he named it.

Wasn't that daft?

But there it was, and he loved it.

The elevator dinged.

Robert pushed him away, but his eyes promised Aaron more.

They walked down the hall.

To a room.

Robert ran the keycard through.

And they were all teeth and tongue again…

He felt Robert's teeth on the side of his neck, followed by tongue, lips, and hands yanking on his belt. His own were under Robert's shirt, breaking the buttons…

"I like this shirt."

"I'll sew them back on…." Aaron muttered and kissed his chest, falling down to his knees, his kissed Robert's stomach.

"That'd be a sight…." Robert laughed, his stomach moving with it, under Aaron's lips. Hands in Aaron's hair.

Aaron looked up and yanked on his jeans, on his boxers, and grinned as he exposed Robert's cock. He moved forward and pressed his mouth to Robert's hips. He wrapped a hand around him.

"Fuck, fuck…" Robert swore, and he stumbled.

Aaron wrapped an arm around his legs.

The stumbled, tumbled, Robert's back hit a wall, or maybe the door, and Aaron heard him mumble. "Okay, okay, now."

He opened his mouth and swallowed his cock, tightening his hand the way he knew Robert liked it. Felt fingers twist in his hair — the way Robert knew he liked it…

They went hard until they both kind of froze…

Aaron looked up.

Robert was looking down.

They both laughed.

"Keep fucking going. No one is interrupting," Robert laughed.

~~~

Aaron's flushed red underneath him.

It's beautiful.

Perfect.

His eyes are bright and blue.

The blush Robert's eliciting causes it. It's his favorite shade of Aaron's eyes.

"Look at you," he whispered as he pushed up Aaron's legs, moved over him, a tight grip on his cock so this isn't over before it starts.

Aaron just makes a noise, a cross of a whine and shout. It means hurry it up, it means shut up, it means fuck me. But Robert wants to hear it, and he leans in, hooking Aaron's legs around him and bends to whisper in his ear. "What's my order?"

Aaron growled, grabbed his face, and kissed him. Hard, wild, and bites out. "Fuck me."

~~~

He's floating, but he won't fly away. There are strong arms around him. He and Robert are back to back. Robert's smushed his face into his neck, breath even, passed out to sleep. Aaron was close too, to drifting off into something peaceful, something he hadn't felt in far too long…

But he's not ready.

He's not ready for his breathing to even out.

He's not ready to stop floating from his orgasm.

He just wants to hold on to this, this space of a moment.

Where he and Robert came one right after the other, eyes locked and saying things that made him blush, that made his heart race, that made him feel like he belonged.

He belonged right there.

He sighed and moved, Robert somehow pliable in his sleep, made it, so they were face to face, arms and legs tangled, entwined. He pressed their noses together and lightly kissed Robert's mouth. "Mine," he whispered before allowing himself to fall asleep.

~~~

He was brushing his teeth when he heard something clatter from their room. Aaron walked out, toothbrush in his mouth to make sure nothing had been broken — they'd probably have to pay for that. And maybe they'd already broken one lamp…

Not that they'd noticed at the time.

But nothing seemed broken. Robert was just bent over, picking up everything from his toiletry bag. Shaving cream, his body wash, his razor. Aaron stared at it all, then he stared at his boyfriend's arse…

"Rob?"

Robert jumped like he'd been caught doing something. He blinked at Aaron wildly.

"What are you doing?"

"I just thought… I thought… I forgot something…."

"What?"

"Uh…more lube. We finished…"

"There is enough in it."

"Barely…"

"We can just buy more. No reason to rifle through your stuff."

"Yeah, uh, yeah…." Robert mumbled.

"You're being weird."

"Am not," Robert said. "Want to check out the pool? Or a movie, maybe? Or reservation isn't until late. We have all day?"

"Movie might be fun… if we sit in the back." Aaron smirked.

"And get called grandpa again?"

"Worth the insult, innit?"

"Or…" Robert crossed the room, yanked the toothbrush out his mouth, and started to kiss his neck. "We could just stay here."

Aaron felt his knees give out.

All he did was nod.

~~~

They'd decided on just walking around before they had to head to the restaurant. Robert let Aaron walk ahead of him because he wanted to admire the view. Aaron looked amazing, in dark jeans and a crisp white button-down shirt — that he'd surprised Robert with. He wondered how long he'd had it, how long he'd been waiting to torture him with it.

He wanted to tear it off.

Aaron wanted to play hard to get.

It was nearly enough to stop him from berating himself for forgetting the rings.

How had he forgotten the rings? He remembered opening the compartment… had he been interrupted? If he had been, why hadn't he gone back to get them? Instead, he'd packed everything else they might possibly need…

But the rings.

He was taking him to a restaurant by the shore and for a late-night walk, and he had no rings. He ran his hands through his hair and sighed. Could he do it with them? It didn't feel right. He'd spent a long time getting the perfect ones. They fit Aaron, they fit him, they fit them.

He wanted to marry Aaron.

"Robert…" Aaron looked back at him.

He'd let him get far ahead.

He started forward and ended up getting blocked by a procession of women all in the same gray dress, yelling at someone with a camera that they weren't doing what the bride wanted…

He looked around.

A wedding either had happened, was happening, or would be happening any second. There were ornate flower arrangements, a harp, and a ridiculous ice sculpture being maneuvered.

Robert sighed as he dodged it all and finally made it to Aaron.

Aaron was scowling as he watched someone walk in with even more flowers. "What a waste of time," he muttered.

"What?"

"All this mess, crazy flowers, and stupid music…" he waved his hand at the harp.

Robert felt his heart stop.

"It's just so…" Aaron shrugged. "Not sure the word, but it's too much."

"Uh…I mean, maybe. It's a big day."

"Eh," Aaron said. "Whatever. We better find a taxi."

"Right…" Robert frowned, but his mouth twitched into a smile as Aaron took his hand. He squeezed it. But his mind was in a billion different directions as Aaron's reactions to the wedding kept replaying in his head.

He hates the idea.

Maybe it's good I forgot the rings?

He felt titled off course, heart hammering….

Aaron smiled at him shyly as they squeezed into the backseat of a small cab. Their hands clasped on Aaron's thigh. He met Aaron's eyes and saw that softness that was only for him. It was his look. It was soft and open and told him Aaron was his…

Maybe this was all they needed?

But you want the vows.

~~~

It was too cold to be on a shoreline, but they'd gone for a walk anyway. Even taken off their shoes, tossed them around their necks for the walk. Slightly reliving a bit of their first vacations. Robert muttering about how traditions were worth it as he complained about the cold.

Aaron felt the cold, too, but he didn't care. They were, hands tightly held — he couldn't stop himself from reaching for Robert's hand. All-day. He never thought he was the soppy type until Robert. Until he learned, he lived for how Robert smiled, how Robert said his name, making him laugh and making him lower his voice and say Aaron's name like it was sin…

He shivered at the thought of it and squeezed Robert's hand.

Immediately he felt the answering squeeze, and he glanced at him.

His jaw was clenched too tight.

Aaron frowned. "Everything all right?"

"Of course," Robert breathed and glanced at him.

"You sure… you seem…."

"It's nothing."

Aaron frowned. "Robert?"

"I just…" Robert stopped walking and pulled Aaron toward him. Aaron moved, so they were face to face, bare feet in the cold sand, and Aaron leaned up as Robert pressed a palm against his cheek. "You make me happy," he whispered.

It made Aaron blush, and he nodded.

"I didn't know I could be," Robert whispered. "And we have Seb, which you've been so fantas.…."

"Thank you," Aaron blurted out, cutting Robert off. "Sorry."

"It's…thank you?"

"For him, for letting me… for Papa," Aaron bit his lip and let go of one of Robert's hands to wipe at his eye. "I just… you make me happy too, you know. I know I don't… words are…." Aaron blew out a breath. "It's I thought we were perfect, but then he showed up, and we're more perfect now. We're a family, and I just, you should know, I want you to know. I wouldn't change a thing, any of it, how we are, our life — it's pretty perfect."

"Uh, yeah…" Robert's expression shifted oddly. Aaron found himself leaning forward, touching Robert's chest as worried spiked through him.

"What's wrong?" he blurted out.

"What? No, no…nothing," Robert kissed him, then again. "Nothing. I just, I love you, so much, and it's…it's. Knowing you feel…feel it so much too, it's a lot."

Aaron nodded.

"But you're right, you are. We are pretty perfect…." Robert kissed him again.

Aaron leaned up, into it and it went from soft to something hungrier rather swiftly… "We need, we need to get back to the hotel."

Robert pressed one more kiss on his lips, then his jaw, and shook his head. "Let's just walk a bit longer. You still need to find a fossil."

Aaron knew he was lucky.

Chapter Text

He was sweaty, content, and Aaron was plastered to his back. Aaron pressed kisses to whatever skin he could reach and let out a chuckle. "I think we're getting better at being quick."

Robert laughed. "Yeah, I can't move now, though. Don't wanna clean up and get dressed."

"Have to," Aaron laughed and rolled off of him.

Robert reached back to try to keep Aaron's weight on him, but it was too late. He heard Aaron going into their bathroom and the water running. He sighed, picked up the monitor just to make sure Seb wasn't awake. He put his ear up, and he could just make out quite snuffling. He couldn't put it down, and Aaron's hand was in his hair before he realized he was back.

"Sleeping."

"Yeah, he's doing that little snuffle."

Aaron kissed his head. "Go on, your turn."

Robert sighed and climbed off the bed.

Aaron grabbed him by his hips, his eyes slowly traveling Robert's body. "Maybe no shirt."

Robert thumbed the hem of the black t-shirt with some obscure indie band's name on it. "It's only fair this comes off then…" he pulled it off of Aaron and leaned in.

Aaron dodged the kiss. "Don't start. We have no time for around two."

"We might…"
Aaron just laughed and pushed him toward the bathroom. He gave in, idly hating he was an adult for a few minutes as he cleaned up, tossed on some trackies, and brushed his teeth.

He found Aaron with his ear to the monitor and shook his head. His heart sped up, and he felt that pull and that tug of craving Aaron. All of him, wanting more and more with him. He felt greedy.

It was greedy.

And selfish.

Aaron wasn't interested in marriage.

He felt it hard every time. A knock of disappointment. But it was stupid to be hurt by it — Aaron loved him. He loved them. He thought what they had was perfect and whispered how he wouldn't change anything, staring at Robert like he was special.

It was enough.

Aaron was enough.

He'd always be enough.

He didn't need a ring or marriage.

He had a family.

"Rob…"

He blinked, and Aaron was staring at him.

"Yeah?"

"Come to bed," Aaron said and moved back to his own side of the bed and put the monitor down. "He's breathing deeper. We better do the same before he's in here at the crack of dawn."

He just moved and climbed into the bed and found himself with Aaron plastered to his back again, leg over his, arms tight around him. He wondered how he ever fell asleep before.

~~~

He loved his mother, he really did, and he loved Paddy too… But they could be a lot, especially that the same time. Egging each other on and his mother would get louder and shriller. She was laughing, too hard, at something Paddy said that was only moderately funny, and Aaron kept checking the time and willing Robert to show up.

They were meant to eat with them. His mum agreeing to try and trying meant a weekly dinner of the four of them. They were going to ask tonight if they could start to bring Seb instead of dropping him at Vic's every time. This was meant to be family time, and he was family.

Aaron smiled and looked at his phone. At his lock screen, at Robert and Seb's faces… He saw Robert in Seb from the nose to the glint in his eyes. He checked the time again — Robert's writing group should've ended by now. He should have picked Seb up from nursery and left him with Vic and Adam.

"He's late," Chas said.

"Don't start," he said on reflex.

"I'm not… I'm not, luv," Chas said. "Just he is late."

"It's fine. I'm just going to text him…maybe his group went over, or Seb's giving him trouble."

"How is he, the little one….' Chas asked. "He more settled with the two of ya?"

Aaron nodded. "Yeah, we… we have a routine and all. He's amazing and funny. Bit of a troublemaker."

"He's at that age… though they never grow out of it," she gave him a look.

He rolled his eyes, and his phone pinged. Robert had answered his text.

R: No Adam.

Aaron frowned at that.

R: Vic working?

Aaron nodded as he typed out an answer.

"What's wrong?"

"Adam's not home."

R: I have to bring to them.

Again he nodded and looked up. Guess he was asking his mum if Seb could come now, rather than over dinner. "Uh… Robert's gonna bring Seb and Julie with him."

"Oh, oh…" Chas hurried to the kitchen. "I think we have food. They'll eat the chips at least."

He laughed. "It's alright?"

"Of course."

"We uh, we want to start to bring Seb all the time?"

Chas and Paddy exchanged glances.

"That's, that's, that's great," Paddy said. "He should come, right."

"Yeah, he's family…." Aaron smiled and put out a text to Adam. It was weird he wasn't home. Vic would leave the pub soon, but still…

He waited a bit after typing, but nothing happened.

"Aaron…" Vic poked her head into the room from the pub. "Chas, it's already if Julie eats with ya. Robert just told me… I'm sorry. Adam says he got caught in traffic. He was doing errands."

"It's fine," Chas said. "Really."

Vic nodded and went back to work.

Robert walked in a second later, both kids in tow along with all the stuff that comes with kids. Aaron jumped up to help him with the bags and things but got double hugged by Seb and Julie. They both started to talk about their day, thick as thieves, and as usual, they seemed to be the center of some happening at their nursery.

Robert grinned as Aaron asked him silently if Seb was in trouble.

"No," he murmured. "Chas, I hope it's alright…."

"It's fine. Aaron mentioned you guys want to bring Seb over more. Of course, you can."

It was a bit chaotic after that, but they all set down, and Robert answered questions about his day at work — and if he really liked teaching and other small talk. Aaron kept himself busy with the kids, making sure they stayed in their seats and ate more than played with their food. Robert assisting when needed and Vic poking in a few times to check on Julie…

Adam showed up as they cleared the table, and Vic was putting on Julie's coat to take her home. He babbled, apologies, and picked up his daughter, and Aaron just shook his head at all of it.

Seb started to yawn, and Robert shot up. "We better get him home too."

"Oh, I suppose it is late…." Chas said, and Aaron almost bought; she was disappointed. "Aaron…" she asked him to follow into the tiny kitchenette. He followed her with dishes and put them in the sink, and started to turn it on.

"No, no, you don't have to help with the washing."

"What is it?"

"You three really are happy, aren't you?"

He just stared at her.

"I know, you've been telling me," she sighed. "He… he seems to really care about his students."

"He does."

"I believe it…" she admitted.

Aaron smiled. "Yeah?"

"Yeah…" she smiled.

He blinked.

"He's…you're right. He's not really what I thought he was."

"You mean that?" he felt wary and hated it. He wanted to believe his mum and Paddy could see the real Robert and not the villain they cast him as… He needed it. He wanted all of his family to get along.

"Yes…I don't know we'll ever be close, but it's clear he's… He loves that boy, and he loves you. You'd have to be daft not to see it."

He blinked and looked away.

"Oh, luv…" Chas hugged him. "Bring Seb here as much as you wish. If Sarah or Vic are busy, you can call me, alright? I want to know him too… he is quite funny like you said."

"Yeah, yeah…" he said into her shoulder. "Yeah," he smiled.

She grinned. "So…."

"So?" he tensed.

"It's not bad."

"Then what is it?"

"Will there be a wedding soon?"

"A what?" Aaron yelped.

"A wedding."

"No, no…" Aaron shook his head. "We don't need that."

"Need that?" Chas laughed.

"Mum, we're… I love what we have. We don't really need that."

"I just want you happy, settled…."

"Oh god…" he sighed. "Mum, I love where we are now, us and Seb. What more do we need."

"Alright, alright… I'll drop it."

Aaron rolled his eyes. He knew that tone and shook his head. A wedding? He nearly laughed. It was daft, really. They didn't need that… What was it anyway? Just a piece of paper or something. He didn't need that to know Seb and Robert were his…

He glanced behind and smiled at them. Seb was fighting, putting on his jacket, and Robert was clearly biting his tongue — they'd vowed to not shout. They'd promised themselves they'd be better fathers than what they'd had…

It was especially important to Robert.

He still carried a lot of pain.

Aaron darted forward to take over, forgetting all about weddings.

Chapter Text

He climbed into his car at the end of his day at the learning center and found himself staring at the dashboard. The rings were in there, sitting there, and he wondered what he should do with them? Return them? That thought made his chest hurt. He opened the compartment and pulled out the box. He opened them and stared at them.

He'd thought they'd be wearing them by now.

He'd thought they'd have set a date.

That he'd be driving Aaron mad with questions about details and stuff.

That'd he'd make him smile, mentioning possible honeymoon locations.

He snapped the box shut.

~~~

Two hours later, they'd gone long, enjoying the short story someone had written so much, no one wanted to stop talking about it. Robert was grabbing his bag and trying to dodge the look his mother was giving him. She was part of the group, been the one to invite him in — he hadn't even known she dabbled in short stories.

He recognized a lot of the scenarios in them.

He saw himself sometimes, but through his mum's eyes — he wasn't sure he was deserving of her sentimentality. The forgiveness in her words and the way the story played out.

He wasn't sure Andy was either…but that was a whole other thought. It did show him how well his mum knew him. How much she loved him. And how much she noticed.

So, he was trying to dodge the look she was giving him. By dodging her. "Mum, I gotta get home."

"You're avoiding me."

He rolled his eyes. "No, I'm not."

"You sat on the other side of the room… and you barely shared anything tonight. Just talked about being busy and shared a paragraph."

"Been busy… Seb keeps on our toes."

"Hmmm…." Sarah raised an eyebrow. "Been dodging me since you came back from your small trip."

"That was ages ago."

"Not really…Robert?"

"What?"

"Don't think I didn't notice you came home very much not engaged."

He sighed.

"And I'm doubting Aaron said no."

"He probably would've…" he muttered.

"Sweetheart, that's impossible."

"Mum…" he walked away.

He heard her heels clacking the floor behind him.

He stopped.

She touched his arm as she walked around him. "Alright, we're going for a drink."

"I don't have the time…."

"Make it," she said in that tone he knew better than to argue with.

He nodded and pulled out his phone.

"Pub across the street, I'll get us a table," Sarah said, softening her demands by kissing his cheek and walking off.

He shook his head and opened his phone and found he didn't want to lie to Aaron about why he would be late, but he needed to tell him what was happening without making him curious. He frowned and went with something simple. Maybe it'd be enough…

It's just he felt like he was acting weird the past week and a half. And he was. He was trying to adjust and adapt to what things were now — give up on the idea of asking Aaron to marry him.

He hated it.

R: Mum wants to drink after group.

He started walking out of the coffee shop they'd had the meeting in. His phone went off what felt less than a second later.

A: Alright. Seb and are good in the fort.

He smiled at that and shot back a request for a picture.

His mum was at a table with a glass of wine and a pint sitting on it already when he walked into the pub. He smiled as a pic of Seb reading one of his favorite books under the purple blanket they'd used to make him a fort last night came up. He slid it over for her.

She smiled. "How did we ever live before him."

"I don't know," Robert said and stared at it.

"So?" Sarah asked.

"He hates the idea of marriage," he said and tried to sound matter of fact. Tried to sound perfectly alright with it.

"Robert…" she shook her head.

"He does… he went on a rant about weddings being a waste of money. Then he told me how…" he smiled as he remembered, it'd been a beautiful moment, and it'd etched on his bones forever. "He's happy. He's satisfied with how we are. Me and him, with Seb. He's really happy, Mum. It's all he needs. And it's not wrong… we're amazing."

Her face softened.

"And I heard him telling Chas, we don't need it, a marriage or a wedding."

"Chas was talking you two getting married?"

"Yeah. She's trying. I guess that means finding another way to nag him."

Sarah laughed. "Sweetheart… it just isn't something he's thought about. Maybe you should discuss it with him."

"He's made it clear."

"But if you talk with him."

"Mum… he's happy with how we are, content…and…" he frowned. "If it's enough for him…."

"Oh, Robert."

"It's done, alright… and it's not like anything would change anyway. We're happy, we adore Seb, and I get to spend my life with him. Them."

Sarah shook her head, but she didn't say anything.

He felt relieved by that.

~~~

Sarah frowned the entire drive home.

Her son was hurt.

More deeply than he was admitting.

And he was, of course, refusing to a thing about it.

And she couldn't think of one thing to do about that wouldn't be outright meddling. And she couldn't bring herself to be that person. If only she could come up with something sneakier and less obvious…

She'd have to keep her eyes open.

Look for opportunities.

Or figure out how to create an opportunity.

She needed to speak with Aaron — somehow. Really suss out what he was thinking, why marriage wasn't something he wanted — if that was even true. She just couldn't imagine him saying no, Robert.

In any universe.

She wished Robert would just talk with him because she knew her son. He wasn't capable of letting the things that mattered to him go.

~~~

Robert took the rings out as he sat in his car in front of The Mill. He needed to let it go and just forget about it. Nothing is changing. He refused to see that as a problem. He and Aaron were…

Amazing.

And they were raising a son. Together.

He had a family. A perfect little family. That he wouldn't trade for anything.

Sometimes things took little sacrifices. And maybe he was wrong, and Aaron was right. They needed something official or a piece of paper. They knew who they were together. What they meant to each other. Aaron was everything to him — enough that he could do this.

He could forget marriage — a lot of people stayed together for decades without doing it. It wasn't a necessary step…

You want to call him husband.

Robert pushed the thought away.

He loved Aaron, and this was what Aaron wanted.

They were already perfect.

He shoved the rings back into the dashboard and pushed the thought of marriage to the back of his mind. This was the last time he'd look at the rings…

Can't bring yourself to try to return them, though, can you.

~~~

Aaron kept trying to keep his eyes open, but it was hard. He was leaning against some pillows he'd grabbed to make being on the floor more comfortable, and Seb was passed out on his chest. He'd had a nightmare the night before, and maybe all of them were tired because of it — it was why though disappointment, he hadn't minded Robert taking some time with Sarah.

Being with his mum was always good for Robert.

He envied it but was grateful that so far, his mum was sticking with trying to get on with Robert — for his sake. He stroked Seb's back and nodded to himself. He'd do anything for Seb. He was sure of it, with no hesitation. Like not move, despite the position he was in wasn't great, and Seb was heavy on his chest.

Maybe he should just fall asleep.

If anything, it'd get Robert home faster.

He heard the keys in the door and chuckled.

"Aaron…" Robert's voice was low, probably taking in the dim lighting.

"Down here."

Soon Robert was crouching down and crawling into the fort. His face was warm and split with his happiest smile. "Wow…I need to take a picture."

"No…save me…." Aaron said, but he knew he wasn't convincing.

"Not until we save this moment…." Robert smiled.

Aaron laughed.

But the pictures were taken.

Then Robert pulled Seb into his arms and frowned slightly when it didn't wake him. "Should we have tried harder to get him to sleep last night."

Aaron wasn't sure. "It was the first nightmare he'd had in a long time... Think it scared him more because of it."

Robert nodded. "I hope they stop someday completely."

Aaron stroked Seb's hair. "Me too."

"I'm gonna take him up to bed."

"I'll come in case he wakes up."

Robert nodded.

"How was the group?"

"Great…Sydney shared this amazing little time travel story. Why we went over….and then mum."

"Hey, you can spend all the time you want with your mum. You probably needed it to yeah, you've been a bit out of sorts."

Robert froze a bit at that, halfway done tucking Seb into his bed.

"Is it anything I can help with… been waiting for you to come to me?"

"No… it was just worry, you know…" he stroked Seb's hair. "Still doubt I can do this, be not writing great. That always gets me off mood. But…" he looked at Aaron. "How can I complain when I get to come home to the two of you?"

Aaron blushed, and he leaned forward and kissed Robert, then Seb's forehead. "Me too."

Chapter Text

"Seb…" he sighed when he bent in to undo Seb from his car seat. He'd somehow gotten his shoes off. "What did you?" Aaron laughed as he started putting one back on. "We're already late."

"No like," Seb muttered.

"At home, you don't need them, but everywhere else you do, ok?"

Seb nodded.

Having gotten him re-shoed, Aaron picked him and turned to drop him off at nursery and found himself looking at a judgemental face of a stranger. "Hello," he said. "Seb White."

She peered at him and looked at the clipboard in her hand. "And you're Robert?"

"No, Aaron… Aaron Dingle."

"Oh, I see… the boyfriend."

He bit his lip and put Seb on his feet. "Going to be a good boy?"

"I'll try," he said, all cheeky.

Aaron laughed and realized he probably shouldn't have. "Go on, Julie's at the door."

Seb turned and waved at Julie before rushing over.

"Will you be picking him up, or will it be his father?"

"Uh, it'll be his Aunt. Julie's mother."

"Hmm, at least it's family," she muttered. "Try to be on time tomorrow."

Aaron bit his lip again and turned. He got his car and glared at her back as she walked in. He really should've gotten her name. He hadn't recognized her — maybe she was new… He wanted details, so he shot a text to Vic.

V: Oh, that's Claudette. She's a stickler for the rules, not friendly. She just came back from maternity leave. Seb and Julie still have Penny, though, as their main aid.

He wondered what evil she'd spawned and then shook his head. Seb wouldn't be dealing with her directly, and all he really had was a bad impression. Maybe she was good with kids and not adults. His phone rang, and he recognized the number of a client.

"Aaron Dingle."

"Look, Aaron, I like dealing with you boys, but when I say I'll be dropping cars off at ten, I expect you to be here."

"Adam's…" he trailed off and swallowed. "I'm so sorry, I'm on my way."

"You have ten minutes."

Aaron swore and hit the gas and used his blue tooth set up to call Adam. It went to voicemail. "Ads, why aren't you at work? You said you'd handle the drop-off from Eddie. Call me."

He somehow managed to get to the scrapyard with a minute to spare and dealt with a very surly Eddie. He somehow smoothed it over with him and swore up and down it would never happen again. And lied about Adam having a family emergency — but he was positive Eddie knew he was lying through his teeth.

Then he had three cars to scrap and crash, and no one insight to help him do it — plus paperwork, some walk-ins were looking for car parts, and he found himself standing for the next hour or so, doing the work of two people and cursing Adam under his breath the whole time.

He closed up for lunch, half wondering if he should, but he needed a bloody break, and Adam was still not answering his phone. He was half worried but madder than not. Adam has been a flake a lot the past couple of weeks, and he wanted to have a go…

But then he remembered he'd been a flake a lot when they first opened.

He walked into the cafe, tired, starving, and in need of a shit ton of coffee. He ordered a sarnie, a cake, and their biggest americano. He was sat down for barely a second when Sarah slid in across from him and offered a warm smile.

All he could manage was a grunt in return. He was tired and well. His mouth was full. She paid him no mind, though, and ordered herself a latte and a piece of cake. "You look beat."

"I am," Aaron muttered. "Adam hasn't shown up for work."

"Has he a good excuse."

"Hasn't bothered to give me one," Aaron glanced at his phone.

"Odd… well, if he's not a good reason, Vic will sort him right…" she opened her phone. "I was just looking at pictures from their wedding."

Aaron snorted. "Why?"

"Because I'm a sentimental mother," Sarah said. "And while I was scrolling through, I found this…." She showed him the phone.

He and Robert were standing in a corner, both of them with their hands in their pockets and looking in opposite directions. But what stood out was how close they stood together. He laughed. "Thought we were stealthier."

"Hmm, you really weren't… How I'm the only one who caught you."

Aaron laughed.

"This was the first time I noticed the wedding… you were there for him."

Aaron blushed a bit and shrugged. "He was drunk, was helping, that's all."

"Oh, no, it wasn't at all, Aaron," she said. "You look out for him. And he was able to give Vic a beautiful night that included him." She looked back at her phone and scrolled some pictures…

"Here they are saying their vows. Adam looks about ready to throw up."

"Romantic," Aaron snorted.

"It is, the nerves and all, taking a step toward a new chapter."

"They aren't any different now."

"They were already pregnant."

"You know, Aaron Dingle, I thought you were more of a romantic."

Aaron stared at her. "What?"

"The way you and Robert are…."

Aaron blushed. "He's the…I'm just along for the ride with that sometimes."

Sarah laughed. "He does like a gesture…" she smiled. "No idea where he got that...you two are good, though."

Aaron nodded. "I didn't know I could do it."

"What's that?"

"Be happy…" he sat a bit straighter. "And Seb… made it better. All I've thought about all day is getting home later. Will that wear off?"

"I hope not…." Sarah smiled. "I don't think it will with the two of you. You're really content with where you are."

Aaron nodded. "Yeah, it's… scary and all. But yeah… they're all I need."

~~~

Around five, he left Adam to deal with all the day's paperwork and took off toward the pub. He and Robert planned to have dinner there, Vic bringing Seb by after picking him up with Julie. He almost texted Robert twice about not doing it and just heading straight home.

But his mum knew they were coming, and he was afraid she'd blame Robert if they didn't — though she was doing better. It was far from perfect, but he saw her swallowing cracks when an opportunity arose. And when they didn't. And it was something at least.

He parked his car at the Mill and walked down the pub. When he walked in, he wondered if he'd been giving her too much credit because he saw her huff, turn, purse her lips, and walk away from Robert. He was at a table, his laptop out and his glasses on. Robert watched his mother walk off with an exasperated look and jaw clench that said he was keeping his mouth shut.

Aaron sighed.

It would be today.

"Aaron…" his mother called out from where she was behind the bar.

He just waved her off and sat down across from Robert. "What was it? I saw her…."

Robert sighed. "She caught your name on what I'm writing and seemed to think that gave her the right to read it. Accused me of having something to hide because I wouldn't let her…."

"Writing about me?" he blushed.

"Nothing like that," Robert laughed. "It's an for one my writing groups… write a personal story from the past year. It's really about Seb."

Aaron nodded. "He worth what a billion words?"

"Seems low."

Aaron smiled. "I'm sorry she…."

"Don't, alright, she is who she is… we knew there would be stepbacks."

Aaron nodded. "Well, let's make sure it's just a step back, yeah…I'll go give our usual dinner order and have a chat."

"Already, I wanna finish up this last paragraph…" he pushed his glasses up his nose.

Aaron got distracted and just stared at him.

Without looking away from the page, Robert chuckled. "We can do something about your glasses fetish later."

Aaron blushed and hurried up. He sat down at the bar and called out to Marlon about their dinner. Then he looked at his mum.

"I suppose he told you I'm a nosy git."

Aaron nodded.

"It had your name on it."

"So?"

"So? You let him write about you?"

"Why wouldn't I?" Aaron rolled his eyes.

"Private business."

"He'd never do that… plus I read everything he writes, mum. I'd see it. Doesn't make it your business."

Chas sighed.

"He did nothing wrong. He doesn't have to let anyone read what he writes."

"Fine…" she sighed. "I'm sorry."

"Wrong person," he said.

Chas groaned. "Fine. I will before you go."

Aaron nodded, but half wondered if she would apologize.

"Daddy, Papa…" Seb yelled as he ran in ahead of Vic and Julie from the front of the pub. Aaron met him halfway, pulled him up onto his hip, and sighed when he realized Seb's face was sparkling with glitter.

They'd just cleaned up the tub from a bunch.

Robert groaned when he saw it and touched Seb's cheek. "Painting?"

He nodded and showed his stained hands.

Robert laughed and closed his laptop. "Let's see if we can clean that up a bit before dinner."

Aaron handed him over. "She might apologize," he said lowly.

Robert gave him a look that said he'd only believe it when he heard it.

Aaron sat down and felt for the first time all day he could relax. Vic sat across from him with a moody face. "What?"

"Adam called and said he's stuck doing paperwork and won't be home till late. What is that?"

"Don't blame me," Aaron said. "He didn't show for half the day."

"What?" Vic stared. "Was he on a scrap run?"

"No."

"I thought he said…" she frowned, stood up. "I'm calling him."

Aaron shrugged it off and thanked Marlon when he dropped off the food. Plus a meal for Julie and Vic. He helped Julie get settled with her plate, and then he did the same for Seb when he and Robert came back. Robert slid into the seat next to him and wrapped an arm around him.

Aaron leaned into it and wished he'd called this off.

"You're tired?"

"Shattered."

"We'll go after we eat…you can have a bath after Seb."

"I don't wanna bath," he wrinkled his nose.

"Put Seb to bed first then, and I join you…." Robert whispered in his ear. "I'll wear nothing but my glasses."

Aaron went red but found himself nodding.

"It's a date," Robert chuckled in his ear, then kissed his cheek. "I'm so lucky."

"Funny, I was going to say that."

Chapter Text

"Admit it." Robert wrapped his arms around Aaron, his breath tickling breath. "You liked the bath."

Aaron rolled his eyes. "I don't think the bath is why I relaxed."

"Hmm…" Robert kissed his neck, and his hand pushed into Aaron's boxers. "What was it then?"

"I don't know." Aaron blushed and leaned back into Robert.

"Maybe I should do it again…remind you," Robert's hand curled around him and started to stroke.

Aaron sighed but glanced at the clock. "He's going to wake up."

"Could we not bring up our son when…" Robert laughed.

"Rob…" he cautioned but then whined when Robert's hand was gone. But then he was spun around, and Robert moved him back toward the bed.

"We have fifteen minutes… and we've promised we'll make the best of these moments.

Aaron couldn't argue, not that he wanted to, but it was impossible when Robert was manhandling and looking at him the way he was. He was on the bed, and his boxers were being pulled down, and he swore as Robert had him in his mouth before he cottoned onto what he was doing.

"Oh…fuck…" he panted, and his hands landed in Robert's hair, and he tugged. Smiling at how messed up it already was from their bath, which had been perfect. Robert's hands all over him, taking care of him, but this was perfect too, and he'd never really believed in perfection.

He felt daft, but the feeling was drowned out by his arousal, and he tugged hard on Robert's hair and groaned when eyes dark green with lust started up at him, and he told him with a slight nod he was going to come soon… which did exactly what he wanted. It made Robert throw himself into the blowjob with more intensity, and Aaron covered his mouth, afraid he'd been loud, just seconds before he came with a muffled shout of Robert's name.

Robert slowly kissed his way up Aaron's body, Aaron panted, trying to catch his breath, and he met green eyes and smiled. They kissed, and he groaned at tasting himself mixed with the taste of Robert's lips.

"I'm so lucky," Robert whispered, giving him one more chaste kiss and rolling over onto his back.

Aaron rolled to his side, not ready to stop looking at him, and trailed a hand down his chest to his boxers, and he skimmed around the impressive bulge there and shook his head. "We haven't done you."

Robert just shrugged. "You had the bad day."

"Still…" Aaron kissed him and started to push in.

They heard crying.

"You better go…." Robert said with a groan. "Go on."

Aaron kissed him, grabbed his boxers and his robe, and checked on Seb.

~~~

"Hey, bud," Aaron's voice was loud on the monitor.

"Papa…" Seb sniffled.

"Bad dream?"

"I don't know."

"You can tell me?"

"Was about mama."

"I'm sorry…." Robert heard Seb's bed creak as Aaron sat down. "Wanna tell me."

"She was reading to me, and then she disappeared."

Robert blinked hard and put his arm over his eyes. As if it'd stop the ache that just appeared inside all of his bones.

"Why did she go to the special place?"

"Uh…" he could see Aaron biting his lip as he thought. "She didn't want to go, Seb, I promise you. She wanted to keep reading to you and taking care of you."

"But she didn't."

"She couldn't… and, you know what?"

"What?"

"I don't understand it either. Why do some people go… I have people I loved in that special place too, and I miss them."

"You do?"

"Yeah…but I know when they were here, they loved me…and your mum. She loved you more than that."

"More than you?"

"Oh, no, bud… Daddy and I love you like your mum did. Endlessly."

"What's that?"

"It means always no matter what…. You want a story?"

"Yeah… can you read the cow one? That was what she was reading."

"Ok…bud."

Robert wiped his face with his arm, sat up, grabbed some tissues to try to get the sting out of his eyes, and shook his head with a bit of awe. Aaron was amazing and loved Seb just like he did… unconditional and forever surprising.

He made sure his son felt loved and not abandoned.

He swallowed a lump in his throat, turned, and started to rummage through his nightstand. Papers and miscellaneous objects, and he finally found the small photo album. It barely had any photos in it, he'd gotten the smallest one he could find, and it'd still been too big.

But he flipped through the photos it did have until he found the one he wanted to look at him. Him. Barely a week old, in a bassinet and a blonde woman smiling and showing him a book.

He tried to make out the title like he always did, and he never could. It was too old a photo and the camera used probably been cheap. It was a bit blurry, really, but he stared at her.

All he really knew was her name, and something he could never find the words for it. He sighed and started to look for a pad of paper. He heard Aaron come back into their room, but he found what he wanted. Grabbed a pen and started to write…

Only he didn't get very far.

"Rob?"

"I…" he sighed.

Aaron took the pad from him. "Eclectic and snobby taste of music, grab some of the titles to share with Seb when older. Loved the color yellow. Was spoiled — no, he doesn't need to. know that…." Aaron looked at him. "What is this?"

"He won't know her…." Robert muttered. "He won't know her and…."

"Hey, we'll make sure he knows she loved…."

"That's, that's easy to do…but he won't know her, Aaron."

Aaron wrapped an arm around him. "What's this about."

Robert sighed and handed him the album. Aaron flipped through it. "This your…"

"Mum. You can call her that… even if you don't mean Mum."

Aaron nodded. "You look like her."

"Most say I look like him."

"I mean, yeah, but you look like her... The hair and the eyes. What was her name?"

"Patricia…Pat… And that's all I know."

Aaron pulled him into his arms and moved them around, so Robert was the little spoon. "We'll do what we can so he knows more."

"I barely know more about Rebecca than I do her… a favorite color, maybe, just because she wore it a lot. What I remember about her are some awful things she did out of jealousy, and … that was the whole relationship. She wanted to get back at her sister. I mean, great, we have hating siblings in common…" he frowned. "He deserves to know the good things."

"We should ask him things he remembers. He knew her, i. It's still in there in his mind before he forgets. He can tell us what we need to remember. Like I'm reading to her, and he mentioned he liked caramel cakes because she made them a treat once, yeah…."

Robert breathed out.

"We'll figure it out."

He turned in Aaron's arms and stared at him before his face split into a wide grin. "I'm so lucky."

Aaron blushed and shoved at his chest a bit. "You keep saying."

"It's true…." He whispered. "And you were right, yeah… we're perfect, we're just great, the three of us…you were right."

Chapter Text

"Hey, you… what do you think you're doing here? This is a private business," Aaron yelled across the scrapyard as he got out of his car.

Adam flipped him off.

He laughed as he walked up to him. "So, you do still work here?"

"Like you've never slacked off," Adam mumbled ad went back to sorting scrap.

"Is anything up?"

"Just…needed my head sorted…."

"That's not possible," Aaron laughed and hit his back. "You could've told me you needed time off instead of, you know, just taking it. We nearly lost business."

"I know, I know, and I'm sorry, mate. Make it up to you, I promise."

"Alright… for next time?"

"Yeah, yeah," Adam nodded. "Though, uh, I have a favor to ask."

Aaron snorted.

"Vic's pretty pissed at me too, missing phone calls, and well, lying to her."

Aaron nodded.

"Want to try to make it up to her, think you and Robert could take Julie for the weekend? Vic doesn't want to ask Sarah because Julie tired her out so much last time she had more than a day."

"Yeah, I'll run it by Robert but no problem. We've done it before."

"Yeah, just not sense you two took in Seb."

"Oh…their gonna take over, aren't they?" Aaron laughed. "But yeah, we got it, we'll we will. I doubt Rob will say no…." Aaron pulled out his phone.

"Tell him to run details by Vic. She handles that stuff."

Aaron shook his head and sent the text.

R: Vic just asked me, and yeah, we'll sort it.

"They're already sorting it."

"Great, thanks, mate, this really helps me out."

"Family, yeah," Aaron said and thumped Adam on the shoulder.

~~~

Ellie was late for her slot. Robert frowned and tapped his pen on the papers he'd already graded while waiting for her. He usually never could quite finish before she arrived. He tried not to favor students, and usually, it was easy since they were all so different. Different ages, different needs, different levels. But Ellie was one of his favorites.

She was bright but didn't know it. He just wanted her to know it.

He looked at the time. The last time she was late, she didn't show up at all, and all he'd gotten when he texted her was a one-word explanation of sick. He picked up his phone. He turned it off while teaching and checked to see if she had texted him. He asked her after last time.

He smiled, seeing a few texts from Aaron, and fought the urge to open them. He was just about to text her when the door flew open, and she stomped in. Her shoes hard on the floor, and she practically threw her chair down when she yanked it out of the desk to sit in it. Her face looked like thunder.

"Hey," he said.

She just pulled out her math book and the page of probability problems he had her working on over the weekend. "Let's get this over with."

"We could do that…" he said. "Are you alright?"

She stared at him.

"Seem upset?"

"So?"

He frowned and wondered if it was really his business. But he wasn't going to ignore how she thundered in and was so late. "Why were you late?"

"Missed the bus," she said too quickly, and she looked away.

"Nice try."

She sighed. "Does it matter? It's not really any of your business. You're just my tutor....and none of this matters."

"Of course, it matters."

"Why?" she muttered. "Not even going to go to university."

"You don't know that."

"I do," she snorted. "Dad thinks mum's wasting her time paying for this, I heard them. And he was late picking me up from school because he forgot about this and told me it was all a waste. I'll just be a stripper like she was."

He forced his mouth to remain shut and curled his fists under his desk.

"So, what's the point?" Ellie asked him.

First, he wondered if he should say it, then he wondered what a more PG way of saying it might be, then he decided to fuck all of that. "Because your father is fucking prick, and we're going to show him up."

Her eyes widened.

"Your mum cares about your future, and you're working your arse off the past two weeks tells me you care too... So we're going to continue to take this seriously."

Slowly she smiled a little bit.

"Good... How do you think you did…" he asked, taking the worksheet from her.

"Uh… okay, except for the last two…."

They were ten minutes into her session when the woman from the desk poked her head into his room. "Mr. Sugden?"

He blinked at her.

"Your son's nursery called."

"You have a son?" Ellie asked.

"Yeah," he said, as he called them back. "Hello?"

"Yes?"

"This is Robert Sugden?"

"Yes, Sebastian threw up…."

"What?"

"And he has a slight temperature, and it's policy to send them home."

"Um, yeah…how is he?"

"Cranky, but that's to be expected."

"Alright, someone will be there to pick him up."

"Guess, today's cut short… Ellie said.

"No…" he shook his head. "It'll take me too long to get there…I want him home faster…..Aaron?"

"Hey? Did you decide on what you want for tea?"

"What? No. The nursery just called. Seb's sick. Can you get him? It'll take me nearly an hour, and your…."

"On it, what's wrong."

"Threw up."

"Ugh…damn it. I'll get him and set him up in bed."

"Check his temperature. We might have to…."

"See, Liam, yeah, don't worry."

"Alright, I'm gonna finish up my student and then…."

"We'll see you."

"Alright, love you."

"Love you too."

"Love you," Ellie rolled her eyes.

Robert snorted. "Focus."

"Alright, whatever, but that was gross, Mr. Sugden."

~~~

Aaron walked into the nursery, looked around, and groaned when the only person he saw was Claudette. He walked over to her. "Hey, I'm here for Seb."

"Well, you can't take him."

He blinked. "What?"

"You aren't family," she sighed. "I called MR. Sugden to get his son."

"And he called me. I'm on the pick-up list."

"It's policy that sick children are given to their parents."

"I am his…" but he faltered in the face of her judgemental stare. But no, he shook his head. "I am his family as much as his father. Get me, my son."

"Sorry, no, we'll have to call Mr. Sugden."

"No, you will give me Seb now…" he shouted.

"Papa?" Seb came running out of a room, hearing him, and Aaron kneeled down and caught him. He felt warm, and he looked pale. He hugged him. "Daddy told me you were sick."

"It was yucky. I want a blue blanket."

"Yeah, bud, we can do that."

"Again, no, you can't," Claudette sighed.

"Claudette…" Lindsay, Seb's teacher, shook her head. "Aaron's on the list."

"He's not family. He can pick him up but not when he's ill."

Lindsay rolled her eyes. "That's ridiculous."

"Papa?" Seb looked confused. "Your family."

"I am, bud…." Aaron picked him up and looked at Lindsay. "We're leaving."

"Go," she said and mouthed an apology.

"You cannot…." Claudette tried to block him. He glared at her.

Seb started crying.

Aaron glared at her harder.

She slowly stepped aside, her entire face screwed up in irritation.

He felt more irritated than her face looked. He somehow managed not to storm out, but it was a near thing, but he didn't want to upset Seb further. He forced himself to calm down and was all smiles and promises of doing whatever Seb needed to feel better as he buckled him into his car seat.

~~~

Robert was packing up things when his phone rang. Ringer turned back on and answered it.

"This is Claudette Banks…"

"From Seb's school… Aaron picked him up, alright yeah?" he glanced at the time.

"Unfortunately…"

"What?"

"Mr. Sugden, it is policy that only family members pick up sick children."

"Aaron's family."

"No, Aaron is your boyfriend…family members are parents, grandparents, and when needed aunts and uncles."

"Where is my son?"

"….your boyfriend forced the issue and left with him."

"Good."

"No…"

"Who is your boss?"

"Excuse me?"

"Who is your superior?" he repeated."

"Brittany Lloyd..." Claudette said with the same disdain she said, boyfriend.

"Yeah, well, she'll be hearing about you from me," he said. "It won't be good."

He hung up and immediately called Aaron.

"We just pulled up. He threw up again. I gotta get him a bath."

"Are you… you both alright, though, I just got a call from that Claudette…bitch."

"I wanted to kill her, but Seb was there… she upset him, which I don't think helped. He heard her say I wasn't family."

"Fuck."

"Yeah… look, just get home, yeah."

"Take care of him, and yeah, I'm on my way."

Chapter Text

Seb fell asleep moments after his head hit his pillow, his skin still a bit cool from the cooling bath Aaron had given him and his hair a bit wet and curled up at the ends. He tried to dry it off more, but Seb said his head hurt too. So he'd stopped and put him in his favorite pajamas, the lamb ones his mum had bought him, and he held one of the soft toys he asked for the most when he was missing her. And it was obvious to Aaron this was the first time Seb was ill since they took him on in any way that wasn't a bit of a sniffle or a cough.

He sighed and sat down on the floor by the door to the room, where he could sit and watch Seb sleep and be here if the little boy needed anything. He checked his watch and knew Robert would be up the stairs any minute. He just hoped he could curtail his fussing about enough he wouldn't wake Seb up...

He smiled, though, knowing Robert would fuss and worry and be the perfect Dad.

He heard the door and boots on the stairs. He stood up, grabbed Robert by the back of his shirt, and shhed him. "He's asleep."

Robert's hurried movements stopped short, and he quietly went closer to the bed. "Cooling bath?" he asked as his fingertips touched Seb's hair.

"Yeah, and I gave him something for his stomach. Called Vic, and she said what to use."

"He says his head hurts a bit too."

"He's holding that puppy."

"Is that what that is?"

"I think so... Bex gave him that."

"He wanted his lamb jammies, too," Aaron said, sliding his hand into Robert's.

"Has he asked for her or anything?"

"No, he was clingy, though. Wanted me to carry him and hold him. Got into the tub with him. It helped."

Robert looked at him then and saw Aaron change into shorts and a t-shirt, and he touched his hair. "He splashed you?"

"Kinda started it to distract him. He was tired, though. He fell straight to sleep.'

Robert turned back to the bed. "What do we do now?"

"Well, I think you should take a shower. I'll watch him."

"I don't wanna leave now I'm here."

"At least take off your boots, Rob."

Soon they were both sitting against the wall and watching Seb sleep.

"I have an appointment with the school tomorrow," Robert said. "Early, the only time I could get, before work."

"Why?"

"What that bitch did won't be tolerated."

"Oh..." Aaron frowned. He'd forgotten about her, wrapped up in Seb. "She really worth it?"

"You have all the rights I do with him. Going make it clear."

"Kind of doesn't, though..." Aaron frowned. "I mean, I'm just..."

"His Papa," Robert's voice was hard. "You are his Papa."

Aaron felt tears sting his eyes and nodded.

"What happened won't happen again." Robert wrapped an arm around Aaron's shoulders.

Aaron leaned into him, and he ended up worrying his lip. The moment flew back to him, and he felt insecure about what he was to Seb. Not from his heart or Robert's point of view but the world's... It wasn't much to say he was the father's boyfriend...

It didn't feel like enough, even though it was. It was everything to him. Robert and Seb were his whole being. He couldn't imagine being anywhere else or with anyone else. He leaned into Robert, and Robert's arm tightened.

"What is it?"

"Just worried about him," Aaron lied.

"Yeah, me too, though... he's doing a great job sleeping and drooling on his pillow."

"Yeah, takes after ya."

"Hey?!"

~~~

He was making soup because it felt the thing do, and he hoped Seb could keep it down. He was upstairs now, awake and cranky. Aaron was reading to him from his favorite story. And what Robert really wanted was to be there with them, but they all needed food.

So soup.

A boring chicken noodle, mostly from the can, though he was adding in some fresh chicken from last night's tea and fresh carrots and spinach. Aaron and Seb would have to deal with that. He wanted them all healthy.

And, of course, there was a pounding on the door.

He frowned and started toward and remembered catching the silhouette of his sister that they were meant to be taking Julie for a few days. Was that tonight or tomorrow night? He barely knew his name. His whole world became a sick son the minute he heard Seb was poorly.

He opened the door about to tell Vic he couldn't take his niece but was struck silent by his sister's tear-streaked face. Julie was holding a little suitcase next to her but behind her was Vic's bigger one...

"Vic?"

"We need to stay here," she said with a sob and brushed past her.

"Seb's sick..."

"I heard when I picked up Julie."

"Yeah, we don't want her to...."

"I had it already, Uncle Wob."

He frowned at that and bent down. "Did ya?"

"It goes away fast, just icky during icky and gross."

"It is, yeah..."

"Mummy and Daddy fought."

"Shh, that was just a disagreement," Vic muttered as she wiped her eyes.

Robert looked between them.

Julie shrugged. "Can I see Seb?"

"I don't..." he frowned.

"Go on," Vic told her daughter.

Julie headed toward the stairs.

"Julie, be careful..."

"Of the stairs, I know Uncle Wob..."

Robert stared at the suitcases, sighed, and pulled them in. "Vic?"

"He, he, he... Met someone and flirted and almost took her out to dinner."

Robert blinked.

"I left."

He shook his head. "Adam cheated."

"NO," Vic yelled but cried. "No, he didn't, but he almost did, and I can't look at him."

"What?"

"He came to his senses, he said, and he wanted to be honest, he said... He nearly cheated on me. We can stay here tonight, yeah?"

"Why didn't you throw him out of the house?"

Vic let out a sob and slumped on the couch.

He heard the pot with the soup start to boil over, cursed, and went into the kitchen. "Vic, this isn't a great time."

"Seb just has a bug."

"Yeah, but it's his first bad one..."

"I doubt that."

"Without his mum..." Robert hissed at her.

Vic's eyes widened, and tears fell out.

"Well, my husband cheated."

"You just said he didn't."

"Nearly... close enough."

"Is it?" he snapped and wondered why he was defending Adam. "Whatever, you know what? I don't care."

"Robert."

"Vic...fine. You and Julie can stay."

Vic nodded and went back to... slumping on his couch.

He counted to ten and checked to see if the soup was salvageable.

He heard Aaron on the stairs.

"Robert?"

"We have company," he muttered.

"Why?"

"ASK ADAM," Vic shouted.

"What did Adam do," Aaron asked.

"I'm honestly not sure," Robert muttered, and he started to fill three mugs with soup and then realized he had company. He grabbed another small mug for Julie and glanced at his moping sister. "Do you want soup?"

"No."

"Yeah, her tears are probably salty enough..." he muttered.

"What happened?" Aaron walked toward Vic.

"Your Adam is a cheat."

"He what?" Aaron's whole face dropped. "He wouldn't."

"You would say that, just like him... going on about how he couldn't do it, that he loves me and he'll never be tempted again..."

Aaron frowned and glanced at Robert. "What?"

"I'm going upstairs," Robert muttered.

Aaron glared at him.

"Seb needs his soup."

~~~

Aaron banged on the door to Keepers.

Again.

Again.

It finally opened, and Adam stared at him sadly.

Aaron growled at him and checked his shoulder as he blew past.

Adam closed the door.

They stopped by the foot of the stairs.

"Give me one reason not to batter ya," Aaron snapped.

"I..." Adam stammered.

Aaron curled his fists. "Robert'll be next if it isn't good."

"I didn't cheat on her."

"I think it's the almost she's all tripped up on."

"It wasn't even that... not really... I didn't explain it right, yeah?"

"Well, try again!" Aaron shouted, and he felt more than short-tempered. He wanted to be Seb and Robert. "Seb is sick. I don't want to be here."

"Seb's sick. Does he have that stomach bug Julebear had..."

"Don't Julebear me."

Adam groaned.

"Talk," Aaron snapped.

"I was driving alright, and there was a car on the side of the road, the tire was out, and this woman clearly had no clue how to use her jack...She's our age, and she was thankful and wanted to buy me a coffee..."

Aaron stared at him.

"Alright, it felt nice to be flirted with, and I wasn't like hiding anything. I have my ring on..." he waved his hand in front of him. "It was just, she was nice and easy to talk to, and I said yeah and let her buy me one. As thanks. But the next she called and said the car was still weird, and I went to her place..."

"That is where you were the other day."

"Yeah."

"Adam..."

"Nothing happened. I didn't even think it, really. I knew I liked the attention but thought nothing of it. I'd fix it and remind her I'm married, that is all..."

"And?"

"And well, I did that..." he looked away.

Aaron scowled.

"After she tried to kiss me...but it was bad, Aaron, like bad. So I jumped away. I swear I did, Vic's the only one I wanna kiss, and I know I walked right into it for the flattery. And that's on me for being tired and shattered and not spending enough time on Vic and me. Which is what I want to do, why I wanted to talk her away and tell her the truth, but it came out all wrong."

"it sounds all wrong."

"it was wrong, yeah, I get it. I get it. I fucked it up. But it's Vic, you know, it's just Vic. I'll always choose Vic. Vic, she's the only one I want kissing me and wanna wake with, wanna see her when she's all old and gray and even tinier than she is now. It's why I asked her ot be my wife, yeah, to hold onto us forever and show her that's my choice... I just my lack of forethought really screwed me here."

Aaron shook his head.

"Will she come home?"

"Don't know."

"What about Robert."

"He's too worried about Seb to have a thought about you -- consider that lucky."

"I love her, Aaron."

Aaron nodded. "I know that."

"Tell her I'll be here when she's ready for whatever she wants to do."

"Tell her that yourself. I'm not playing the middle person. I'm gonna go be with my son."

Aaron sighed and stalked out of the cottage.

~~~

He sat down next to Vic when he walked back into The Mill.

"Well?"

"He loves ya."

"You believe his daft story about jumping away from her?"

"Yeah, Vic, I do."

She blew out a breath. "Then why he'd go there."

"He's daft...no idea, not sure he knows either. Maybe talk with him?"

"Can't look at him yet..." Vic sighed.

"He said he chooses you."

"Oh, he remembered our vows, did he..." she sighed and leaned back.

"What?"

"We put that in our wedding vows, don't you remember? How we'll always choose each other, hard or not, we'll always choose us."

"Oh..." Aaron shrugged.

"You were standing right there, Aaron?"

Aaron blushed because when he thought about their wedding, all he saw was Robert.

"At the moment, he couldn't cheat on me, but he was there until the moment."

"He said something about you two needing to put work in?"

"He mentioned that we've been in a rut... he isn't wrong. But what he did...almost did...this is just... I wish he hadn't told me."

"Isn't talking better than not?"

"I thought so until that came out his mouth..." Vic shook her head and sighed. "I'll forgive him. I will. Just not yet."

"You will?"

"Was in our vows too...loving his better and his worst sides and vice versa... guess I just never thought I'd live through the reality of having to do that forgiving."

Aaron frowned. "What if you hadn't said those vows?"

"But we did," Vic looked at him. "I hate him right now. But it's all because I love him too, Aaron. I watched mum have this bad marriage with Dad, and I talked and talked with Adam about things, and I swore we'd have vows we had to stick to... that I wanted to stick to because I love him so much, and we aren't perfect people. I chose him. I chose to be his forever... Even if he's an unthinking arsehole who nearly breaks them over some batted eyelashes. It'd be different if he hadn't chosen me...if he'd kissed her. It'd be easier if he broke them and was unfaithful. It'd be so much easier. But now I have to do the harder thing, and so does he....I'll do that promise, the work, and if we can't solve it, we'll go from there."

"Afraid you won't be able to?"

Vic wiped her eyes and nodded. "Gotta try, though. You believe him about not going through with it, rushing off when she tried?"

Aaron nodded because he knew Adam, and it was true.

"Then we do the hard thing we promised to do... Still staying here a few days and making him twist."

~~~

Aaron frowned when he poked his head into Seb's room and just saw the two kids in his room. Julie was on a sleeping bag by Seb's bed, reading a book, and Seb was asleep.

"Seb ate all his soup," Julie said when she saw Aaron.

"Did he?"

"Uncle Wob said he doesn't feel as hot either."

"Good."

"I promised to come to get you or him if Seb's sick or needs ya... I think I could be a nurse when I grow up."

"Or a doctor."

"That is what Uncle Wob said."

Aaron smiled and walked further down the hall.

He found Robert on their bed, scrolling through his phone.

"Robert?"

"Did I need to kill him?" Robert asked.

"No."

"Did he cheat or what?"

"He got flattered but freaked out when she went to kiss him... nothing happened."

Robert sighed.

"Vic says she'll let him twist a few days, then do what their wedding vows said."

"Oh, yeah...right. She spent weeks writing those and asked me to help...wanted to set a tone so they'd have a better marriage than our parents. Forgot about that."

"Why would you remember."

"Well, if he'd broken them, I'd kill him."

"He didn't."

"Good... I would hate losing ya."

"You can't lose me," Aaron shook his head and climbed onto the bed.

"Even if I killed your best mate."

"For Vic?" Aaron snorted. "No, I'd help ya. She was my best friend first."

"Good to know your priorities."

"You and Seb are the top."

"He's already feeling better. He's strong..." Robert yanked Aaron into his side.

"Yeah."

"Vic need me?" Robert asked.

"Don't think so," Aaron said, snuggling into Robert.

Robert smiled. "Good, don't want to move."

"You'd never..." Aaron frowned.

"What?"

"Dumb thought..."

"Aaron?" Robert moved, and they were face to face, heads on the same pillow. "I vow right now I love you and only you until my last breath."

Aaron blushed.

"I promise it."

"Me too," Aaron breathed. "Forever."

Robert smiled and hugged him.

But Aaron heard him muttering something against his neck. "What?"

"Nothing, nothing, this all we need...just us," Robert's thumb dug into his cheek before kissing him again. "Just us, all we need, us and Seb, yeah..."

"Yeah..." Aaron kissed him back, but he felt like he was missing something.

Chapter Text

His leg bounced rapidly as he tossed his phone onto the coffee table. It was circles, and he wasn't going to get what he wanted. That bitch Claudette fired. Robert rubbed his hands down his face, leaned back, and tried to unclench his body, but his shoulders remained tight, and his leg wasn't about to stop angrily vibrating.

He swore under his breath and let himself just hate the world for a moment. To hate people like Claudette, who looked down on amazing humans like Aaron. Aaron was the best person he knew, far better than him, and he'd been treated like dirt...

For the act of loving him and Seb.

He was pissed.

And groaned as the buzzer on the door went off.

He got up and hit the intercom.

"Vic?"

"Perfect," he muttered, hitting the button to let Adam open the outer doors. He opened the Mill door, stepped back, and crossed his arms over his chest.

Adam came rushing, and his whole being collapsed in disappointment at seeing Robert.

"She here?"

"No."

"Do you know where she is?"

"No."

"She said she might be ready to talk..."

Robert scoffed.

Adam deflated even more. "I'd never cheat on her."

"Not sure you have the right for the use of never there..."

"I didn't, I didn't... I didn't want to. She's the one I choose."

"I thought you had that figured out at the wedding."

Adam stayed quiet.

Robert smirked at the silence, and it made a piece of him feel better about knowing Vic would forgive Adam -- once. He stepped forward. "This is it, you know, you one big screw-up. She won't forgive a repeat of this, even if you wake up and aren't an arsehole."

Adam slowly nodded. "I know, mate. I do."

"Yeah, you better," Robert muttered. "Now get out of my house."

Adam turned around but looked back. "Will ya tell her...?"

"You stopped by?"

Adam nodded.

"No."

Adam opened his mouth but closed it. "Yeah, alright, fair."

Robert stepped closer and nearly shoved him out the door with how fast he closed it behind him. He leaned against it and hoped Adam had figured he couldn't risk his marriage again.

His sister deserved only good things.

Like Aaron.

Like his son.

Only Claudette wouldn't be fired. She got a lecture. At least, that was the gist he was getting from everyone he spoke to. He kept going up and up until there were no more people to shout out. She would be there every day at drop-offs and pick-ups. Giving Aaron shit for being and putting that energy into his son's world...

That disappointment and anger.

He never wanted that to touch Seb's life, and he felt uncomfortable in his skin at memories of disdain. For him and world views that were echoed in that woman's words...

He shut his eyes.

Like that could quiet thought.

He walked back to the couch, slouched into it, picked up his phone, and called Aaron. His leg bounced as he listened to it ring and ring. He felt disappointed Aaron didn't answer with his entire being. But he let it go through to voicemail and shook his head at Aaron's message.

"It's Aaron. Talk."

It fit him, and he loved it. But it wasn't enough to placate his need to hear Aaron's voice. To listen to him breathe, he let out a loud breath when a beep told him he could speak.

"Hey...I um... just wanted to hear your voice," he cleared his throat. "I, um, talked with the nursery. They'd given her a lecture, and seems all their going to do... fuck that... I told them to keep her away from him. And uh, Adam showed up looking for Vic... I was nice - ish," he laughed. "Told him if he does it again, he's out of chances."

Robert closed his eyes. "I just... call me back."

~~~

It was far past lunch when Aaron sat at his desk and pulled out the container holding a massive sandwich from his drawer. He shook his head at his soft boyfriend, insisting on it and thanking him for being so good to Seb while he was sick. Like Aaron, be anywhere else, and the opposite was true, really. Robert got him through Seb being sick more than anything else. Didn't let him get caught up in feeling miserable for the kid's misery.

They'd had their hands full for a few days, which hadn't helped. Vic was underfoot, and he wanted to strangle Adam for being an idiot. He was trying to see his mate's side, but he was having more and more problems with it and was amazed every time he heard Vic say she'd forgive him...

Though it was always in the future tense.

Maybe she wouldn't? Couldn't? Aaron wasn't sure he could...

Irrational fear and jealousy hit again, the thought kept answering his head, and he knew it was mad. Robert promised more than once over the past week -- at times unprompted because he knew Aaron's expressions that Aaron was it for him.

And Aaron believed him.

He just felt afraid of losing Robert. They were perfect. Sometimes that felt like threads of fragile glass to him. That it could be destroyed in seconds. Like how he kept doubting his right to be Seb's Papa. Claudette's voice rang in his ears over and over again...

That he didn't matter.

It was under his skin, the thought Seb wasn't his...

He knew it to be a lie, but fear made things feel shaky.

He was about to check his phone when the door opened, and Vic popped in. And he tried to look happy to see her, but she'd been on his couch one too many days.

She made a face at him.

He managed to smile.

"I've overstayed my welcome."

"No..." he said.

"You're a horrible liar."

Aaron shrugged.

"I'm gonna go back home tonight, but can you keep Julie? I think there will be a lot of shouting."

"We might even hear it in The Mill... yeah, we can keep her."

"When they say marriage isn't easy, guess this is what they mean."

"Who says that?"

"Just phrase, innit..." she sighed. "I love my dad, and I love Mum. But their marriage was awful."

"Why'd you want to do it then?"

"I love him."

"Can do that and not be married."

Vic shook her head. "Suppose that works for some. But I see it as a promise to grow together, change together... Mum told me once that was the main issue in her and dad's marriage. She kept growing, changing, and learning, and Dad just opposed it. He wanted her to stay one thing because he was going to stay one thing... I want to grow with Adam. Even if he's an idiot. It's about choice and fighting to be on the same page. If he shows me he's sticking with that promise, we'll get through this... He will, yeah?"

Aaron nodded slowly. "He loves ya, and I know he's hating himself."

"Good."

"Think if...." Aaron shook his head.

"What?"

"It's daft that Claudette is a homophobe. It'd have been something else if..."

"if what?"

"Robert and I were married."

Vic's face lit up. "Are you thinking about it? I'm surprised you aren't already, to be honest."

Aaron stared at her. "No."

"Oh... I think Claudette would have kicked up a fuss no matter what."

Aaron shrugged. "Yeah... just..."

"What?"

He felt his eyes tear up and sniffed to try to stop it. "I want to be Seb's father as much as Robert is."

Vic smiled."You are."

"But, I'm not, not really... and Claudette isn't the only person out there who would say so."

"They don't matter."

"Still scares me."

"You, Rob, and Seb are family, my family," Vic said. "Adam's soon enough, again. Mum adores you as much as she loves us. She took in both my brothers, yeah? And look at her and Robert. They are so close -- I get jealous sometimes."

"Sarah loves ya."

Vic smiled. "Don't let anyone even hint that you don't get to love that little boy as much as Robert does."

"I don't plan on it...just..."

"Let it get in your head."

Aaron nodded.

"Alright, thanks for Julie again... I'm off to save my marriage. I hope."

"You are, yeah. He's mad about ya."

"Now I've let something get to me," she wiped at her eyes. "But I'm gonna fight for him, just hope he fights back."

"He messes up again. Robert and I will hurt him."

Vic shook her head but smiled in appreciation of the empty threat.

Well, almost empty, Aaron thought, but only because he had faith in his best mate -- even if he was angry with him too.

He watched her leave and shook his head. It was starting to get late. How he'd gotten off to such a slow and long day. He picked up his phone and noticed a few messages. Most of them were his mum, per usual, and he shook his head. But then, he saw that Robert had called him instead of texting.

His heart raced as he hurried to play the message. Afraid Seb was sick again or hurt...

I just wanted to hear your voice.

Aaron was on his feet before the sentence finished. Robert's defeated tone sank right into his own a bit. He grabbed his jacket and keys, locked the cabin, and hurried to his call. He listened to the rest of the messages but only focused on the sound of Roberts's voice and not the words...

He'd needed to hear his voice too.

They hadn't really had much time alone the past few days.

He checked the time on his car dashboard.

There wasn't much time before they'd have Seb and Julie home.

He pushed his foot down on the gas a bit harder.

~~~

A car he did not recognize was pulling out on the street from The Mill as he pulled in, and he glanced at the man in the car. But all he saw was a generic bloke in a suit, and while he was curious, his only goal was to get to Robert. So, he hurried inside and walked in and saw Robert sitting at their kitchen table with documents in front of him.

Robert looked up at him and grinned. "What're doing home."

"I got your message."

"I didn't say rush home."

"You didn't need to," Aaron said.

Robert's cheeks flushed, and he nodded.

Aaron sat down and pulled the chair closer to Robert.

Their hands locked together, both of them, fingers threaded.

They breathed.

Aaron cocked his head to the side. "What's this?"

"Adoption stuff."

"Wha?"

Robert's face went red. "I was gonna bring it up better."

"I, ado...what?"

"You want him, right?"

Aaron looked at the paperwork. "I can?"

"If you want..." Robert looked worried.

"I want to, Robert..." Aaron grinned. "But we aren't married or..."

"We can..just not quite yet. It hasn't been six months since he's been here. But it's looming. Then we can start the paperwork. I was expecting it to be hard, to be honest..."

His heart pounded. "So, I'd be his real dad?"

"You are his real dad. This just tells the world they can fuck off about it if they have issues."

Aaron laughed.

"So, yeah?"

Aaron kissed him.

Robert smiled into it and deepened it.

"We're a family," Robert breathed, pulling Aaron into a hard hug.

Aaron felt the fear he'd been feeling float away.

He felt Robert's mouth move against his skin again.

"What do you keep saying?"

Robert chuckled and moved back to look at him. "I just love ya."

Aaron blushed.

"I love you," Robert said again pointedly.

Aaron shook his head.

"How long do we have this place to ourselves?"

Aaron bit his lip and pulled away from Robert, standing up, but he kept their hands linked. "We better hurry upstairs."

Chapter Text

The Mill was sleep quiet, and Aaron almost felt intrusive about being awake. But he couldn't sleep. He was nervous and jittery. Scared. And the last one bothered him, but he couldn't help it. He kept telling himself that nothing would change in their lives. It was about legality and protection -- for Seb, so he would always have two parents looking out for him. But the feelings continued to overwhelm him.

And he was hovering in the hallway outside of Seb's room. Peeking into the nearly dark room, all except for a dinosaur nightlight. Seb wasn't having nightmares much anymore. Aaron couldn't remember the last time they'd woken up to him crying. It'd been even longer since he cried out for Rebecca. Now he called out for them...

Depending on something that only Seb knew, it would be him or Robert.

He loved it when it was him.

And he loved the way Robert looked at him and Seb.

He bit his lip and tried to relax. He felt like he might run out of oxygen before the day was over -- even if that was impossible. He might pull it off. He couldn't help but wonder why he was so nervous.

They were just signing papers.

Then they were going for ice cream with Sarah.

To celebrate.

Let Seb see the ducks.

He wouldn't even really understand what made today any different than any other day he got ice cream. But Aaron would...

He swallowed over a lump in his throat.

He heard the door of his and Robert's bedroom creak open and footsteps on the carpet. He looked up from where he sat on the floor and chuckled at Robert's bedhead. It was sticking in all sorts of impossible directions. "You need a haircut."

"Thought you liked something to grab onto?"

Aaron blushed.

Robert joined him on the floor.

Aaron leaned into him and sighed a bit as his arm wrapped around him. He was a solid and warm grip. He felt back on earth. Though, it wasn't helping his nerves.

Robert hummed. "I'd say you're like a kid on Christmas who can't sleep, excited about Santa Claus, but you look like you might be sick."

"I'm both?" Aaron asked.

"Tell me, I'm not the one who can't sleep."

"Yet, you're here."

"I'm the one who can't sleep when you aren't next to me."

Aaron felt his insides swoop.

"And I also like making you blush like that... what is it?"

"It feels big."

"When I got the call about him, I laughed -- did I tell ya that?"

Aaron shook his head.

"This stranger told me I had a kid, and I just laughed. I was sure it was a joke, and I felt a bit dazed. Almost mad. It wasn't my usual laugh. I think it was pure panic, and I couldn't stop it. I don't think it stopped until he showed up in front of me... I ran off for air and met him on a staircase. I met my son on the staircase. But I saw him and..." Robert let out a long breath. "All I cared about was he was upset, and I wanted to make it better."

"You do that every day."

Robert sighed. "I don't feel like it."

"You do. He does."

"You do," Robert said. "You met him that day too. And you were perfect."

"I was scared."

"And you are now?"

"It's more...I don't know... he was an extension of you, wasn't in? Is, always, but...he's mine?"

"Of course, he's yours."

"He is, it's not a question, sorry... I don't know what I'm feeling."

"It's a big day, and no one gets to say he's not yours."

"Yeah..." Aaron leaned more into Robert. "But I'm not gonna sleep until I drop off in exhaustion tonight."

"Oh, in about 21 hours or so?" Robert laughed. "Guess I'll be next to you."

"Better be," Aaron ordered.

Robert pulled him closer, his face going into Aaron's hair, and he felt his lips and muffled words. He hummed. "Someday, I'll figure out what you're saying."

"I love you," Robert said.

"No, that's just what you mean," Aaron called out the lie.

~~~

I really wanna call you husband, right now

I want to marry you.

I just made another wedding vow...keeping writing them in my head for you.

Robert bit back a sigh as Aaron called him out for not saying I love you into his hair. Or his skin. Or his mouth. Wherever he could muffle his voice, he would... he'd done it once or twice at first to try to get it out of his system. To remind himself that maybe it wasn't official, but they were truly partners and together in everything together. Especially with Seb...

But he wanted to call Aaron, Husband. Not baby. Or babe. Or sweetie... he grimaced at that thought. Nothing trite or sweet. That wasn't him. He wanted to call him husband, and it was harder and harder not to.

He felt more married to Aaron the more they fell in love. The more they created their family and all its little traditions. The more Seb called out for his Papa over and over again...

Husband. Husband. Husband. Over and over again to Aaron in ways he couldn't hear it -- but his husband knew him. His husband wasn't daft. He knew whatever Robert was mumbling wasn't simple, and maybe it was some sort of secret...

But Robert didn't want it to be.

But he inhaled.

Aaron didn't need them to be officially married. They were going to be a family, a true family, anyway. His own heart raced. He was nervous, too, about the adoption today. The day they could finally make it official, and he couldn't believe how time got away from there. Soon enough, Seb would have been in their lives for a year...

It felt short, and it felt like Seb always existed.

The three of them, on paper, would be a family. It was enough.

It was enough.

~~~

Aaron watched Seb and Robert jumping in mud puddles by the pond. Knowing that inside, it was killing Robert to get his jeans splattered with the dirt, but he was grinning widely, his dimples deep the more Seb enjoyed it and giggled his little laugh...

Aaron couldn't hear it being inside as he waited for their ice cream cones. But he could feel it. The happiness. And he was happier than he'd ever been, and he always felt like the life he and Robert had created reached an apex of happiness.

Only it seemed to be limitless.

And his cheeks hurt.

He rubbed his face a bit.

"Smiling too much is a good problem."

He turned as Sarah slipped into the booth behind them. "Our cones will be forthwith."

He nodded and looked back out the window.

"I've never seen you both so happy," Sarah said.

Aaron nodded, but he couldn't tear his eyes away from Seb. "I'm his father."

"You were from the second you met him."

"I know, but..." Aaron chuckled. "Why does it feel more real? More... solid and safe?"

"It's official...." she said and glanced out the window, her face falling.

"What?"

"I adopted Andy, you know, and I smiled that day like you are now. But Jack... Jack never let me officially adopt Robert. I tried. More than once, especially when we were going through it with Andy. But our marriage was enough -- until he tried to keep me from them all during our last divorce...." she swallowed. "I never wanted to take away from Pat... but I really wanted it to be official."

Aaron bit the inside of his cheek to not let out his opinion on Jack Sugden. "You're his mum. He loves you more than anything."

"No, I think two things are above me."

"It's not... like that," Aaron said.

"No, it's not....but I'm so grateful he has you and Seb. I was worried about him for so long. That he'd never get comfortable in his own skin... and look at him...both will have achey cheeks for weeks."

"Worth it, though... I just didn't expect how some paper could make it all feel more.... real...to see it in black and white. Aaron Dingle, father...." he gulped. "I hope I'm good enough."

"You are..."

Aaron nodded.

"Sometimes rituals or ink...they don't change anything, they just help us and make us know this thing means more... Ink on adoption paperwork, a graduation, marriage..."

Aaron turned toward her that...

Sarah just held his gaze.

"Four chocolate cones, all the fixings?"

Sarah laughed at their intrusion and stood up. "That is us. I'll take them outside."

Aaron nodded.

Sarah left.

"Marriage?" Aaron looked back out the window at his life. His entire life just as a splash of mud hit Seb in the face and lit him up from the inside out with pure glee... Robert chuckling and leaning down with some handkerchiefs or something... was he eighty and cleaning off their son's face.

Their son.

"Marriage?" he whispered to himself as he realized that the meaning of it was completely rewritten in his being. It didn't sound stupid, silly, or dumb...

It felt...

Right.

It was startling, and he shook his head. He took a breath. He couldn't...

He tried to shove it down... and Robert caught his eye through the window. Grinning, so happy and waved him over mouthing Come on, Papa.

Aaron took a few calming breaths. For now, he'd focus on the present.

The present was his son.

Chapter Text

"Aaron..." Robert slurred sleepily into his neck. "Why are you awake?"

"I don't mean to keep ya up," Aaron turned and marveled at how well they moved together to create a new position. Especially with Robert's eyes half closed and his breath deep like he was already under. "Sleep."

"Don't have much choice...you ok?"

"Yeah, better than..."

"Sleep too, Papa..." Robert slurred.

And Aaron shut his eyes at the joy of it. But they opened up again, and he was staring at freckles. A sea of them, and he knew he could never get tired of it. This was what he wanted every night forever. Those freckles, the arms around him, and even half sharing a pillow with someone who drooled. He'd be kicked in the shins soon enough too...

All he could do was smile, and it ached. His face ached from smiling.

He was petrified that someday he was going to be told he had dreamed this all up. Falling for Robert. Seb's perfect face burst into their lives. He'd find out it was all some far-away crazy dream because he ate too much spicy food and got drunk.

He gripped onto Robert tighter.

Robert responded even in his sleep.

He was tuckered out. His eyes hurt from keeping them open. But his brain was whirring. Faster and faster. Sarah's voice was echoing in his head, and he didn't know what to do with it.

He doubted she meant much.

Or he doubted she meant much past what a mother says.

His mum's said it a million times, and he's not even sure why... He and Robert were still a work in progress. But Sarah never pushed... he figured Robert told them they were perfect as they were...

It's what they said, yeah?

He said it.

He never wanted to get married. It was this firm rule in his mind. He'd made it a long time ago, and he never considered that maybe time changed things? Because he'd never wanted a boyfriend either, or any of that sappy stuff... that was for other people. Not Aaron Dingle.

But he always fell into committed relationships, and that was enough...

Or rather, it hadn't been.

All his relationships frayed apart.

Except for this one.

He and Robert got stronger.

Married.

Married.

Married.

He gulped and stared at Robert's face.

~~~

He started another sentence, erased it, ran a hand down the back of his neck, and glanced behind him. Aaron quickly ducked his head into the magazine he was reading on the bed. Robert frowned, took a breath, and tried to go back to writing.

But he could feel it. Aaron's unbelievably blue eyes staring at him.

He frowned. "I can't do this if you're going to stare... this only works cause you're unobtrusive during it?"

"Sorry, sorry..."

Robert turned in his chair. "Is something on your mind?"

"No."

Well, that was a lie.

"I'll go downstairs and watch some telly instead."

Robert fought down a pout -- he didn't know why, but he liked Aaron being in the room when he wrote. Someone he never bothered him. Usually, he never bothered him. "Are you sure nothing's wrong?"

"No, no, nothing at all."

Robert sighed.

Aaron left.

Robert turned back to the computer and started a sentence...

"Fuck it."

He went downstairs. Aaron was on the couch, flipping channels. He sat down next to him. "What?"

Aaron made a face. "Nothing."

"Aaron."

Aaron frowned.

"Something is wrong? Is it Chas?"

"Nah, she's been not that bad."

"Adam and Vic have another row?"

"Nah, they're in a smoochy get-a-room stage."

"Ugh."

"She keeps coming to the portacabin to bring him lunch..."

"She's annoying ya?"

"No, nah..." Aaron shrugged.

"You're being weird."

Aaron picked up Robert's wrist and looked at his watch. "You've only got a few hours to write. You should get to."

"I can't concentrate."

"I left."

"But I can still feel ya staring..." Robert frowned.

"Kind of like staring is all..." Aaron said with a blush.

Robert smirked, and he detected no lies. But? "Somethings up?"

"Just working something out, is all."

"Need to talk about it?"

"Can't..." Aaron frowned."Not with you."

"What?" he felt hurt and shocked. "But..."

Aaron winced and stared right at him. "Not mad or anything. It's the opposite of what you're thinking."

"That my partner can't speak to me about something?"

Aaron winced again. "Not yet?"

Robert let out a breath. "We're alright?"

"Better than."

He clenched his jaw a bit but blew air through his nose. "Alright, space, then... I better try to write."

"Rob..."

He stopped and let Aaron grab his hand. "I love ya."

Robert smiled. "Love you more."

~~~

"It's nearly been two weeks. He's driving me mad."

"Robert, it cannot be that bad. You said you aren't even fighting," Sarah said.

"Mum, he keeps staring at me weirdly, then clamping up. The best I got out of him is he can't talk about it with me... ME. We talk about everything."

"Even couples need some secrets or can't discuss things in their heads right away with the other. Space is a good thing..."

"I'm giving it to him," Robert muttered.

"With this same passive-aggressive air I'm breathing," Sarah chided.

"Yes," Robert whined.

"Aaron loves you. Whatever it is, he'll speak to you about it."

~~~

"Ow," Aaron glared at Adam, who had just kicked his shin.

"We need to head out, and you're staring into space. You get his keys?"

Aaron waved them at Adam, realizing he hadn't seen him walk up. "Sorry... why'd you give Vic your car for?"

"Why is your in the shop?"

"I told you the timing belt went..." Aaron climbed into Robert's Porsche. "Try not to get dirt on the floor."

"My boots ain't that dirty."

"It's Robert's car."

"Yeah, whatever. What is up your arse."

"What?"

"You've been short for weeks now... after the excitement and glow of the adoption wore off. You and he having issues?"

"Nope..." Aaron shrugged. "Not really. We're perfect...but...I kept thinking."

"What? You don't feel trapped?"

"What, no, I love him, and I love Seb."

"Then what are you thinking?"

"If I can't tell him, I ain't telling you."

Adam scoffed.

"Then tell Vic."

"What, NO...." Aaron groaned.

"Mate...something is nagging at you. Deal with it."

"Whatever... the sun is in my eyes. Grab me his sunglasses. They should be in the dash compartment."

"Yeah, yeah..." Adam opened it up, and a bunch of stuff fell right out. "Shit. I thought he was meant to be a neat freak. All he does is pack in a drawer like a bloody normal person."

Aaron laughed.

"Here..." Adam sighed. "I can't even get half this shit. It went under the seat."

"I'll get it later."

"Also, later, find someone to talk with, yeah. Even if it's a bartender."

Aaron laughed.

"I'm serious."

Aaron sighed.

~~~

Aaron rolled his eyes at himself as he sat down at the bar in Bar West. He wasn't sure what he was doing here at all. Adam's advice -- if it even qualified as that ringing in his ears. He wasn't sure who to talk to, and maybe his mate was right.

He needed to say things out loud.

The only problem was he was him.

He didn't talk to people he liked -- other than Robert -- about this type of thing, let alone a stranger. He groaned and waved over the bartender. It was a woman he didn't know, and she asked him if he wanted a pint.

He nodded.

He sipped at it.

He felt a stool move.

He looked to his left.

Some dopey-looking skinny man with floppy hair smiled at him.

"Look, I'm taken," Aaron muttered.

"Aaron?"

Aaron stared at him. "Um?"

"Alex? Alex Mason?"

Aaron shook his head.

"We went on a few dates. I'm a doctor."

Suddenly Aaron was years back where this man was bothering him -- right here in Bar West, and Robert swooped in and changed everything. Everything. And he was smiling.

"You do remember me."

"Huh? No...I mean, kind of, yeah."

"Can I buy you a drink, at least?"

Aaron stared at him.

"No ring. Maybe I have a chance?"

Aaron stared at his hand.

"I thought we had fun."

Aaron stared at him. "Maybe I want a ring from the man I'm with."

"Oh... going to ask him?"

"What?"

"He going to ask you?"

"I don't know..." Aaron sighed. "Ring or not, he and I are for life. So do one."

Alex sighed and got up.

Aaron decided to leave. It was a bloody bad idea. But now his mind was spinning again, with even more questions. Robert was the type of person who did things. He took steps. He was organized, and when he wanted something, he went right for it.

And he hadn't asked Aaron to marry him.

Not even a hint of it.

Why hadn't he?

Aaron was driving himself mad, wondering if he wanted it. He looked at his hand. Would he even like a ring? It would be nice if it kept sad sacks from trying to talk with him...

Though that was no reason to get married.

There when his heart skittered at the thought. Of telling the world in some dumb public way, he loved Robert Sugden forever -- how did he want that? Was he going mad or just soft?

But Robert must not. He had asked.

He'd have asked.

~~~

He drove home, lower lip between his teeth, and realized weeks later, since Sarah put the idea in his head, he was even more confused than ever. Because he was leaning toward it, wasn't he... Only now the question or the answer was, Robert wasn't...

And now he was mad and hurt at Robert for not doing something Aaron thought he hadn't wanted.

It made no sense.

He pulled Robert's car into the drive of the Mill and sighed. Spotting some tissues on the floor on the passenger side. Remembering the mess Adam -- only Adam -- made earlier. He got out, walked around to the other side, and started to pick up things. It was miscellaneous, nothing for the most part, papers, Seb's mittens, and some toys. He spotted something in the backseat, and Adam said something went under it. He pushed his way back and picked it up, and it was a box.

A tiny black box.

He stared at it and wondered what the hell it was, so he opened it.

And he stared at two rings.

He was staring at TWO FUCKING RINGS.

Chapter Text

In his life, the only jewelry he'd ever worn was an ugly gold chain, and he'd only done it because others were doing it, and he was running from how he felt out of place in the world. He hadn't wanted to when it came down to it. And after he took it off for the last time, the thought of jewelry never entered his mind again. It was naff junk, like the gold chain.

The ring he was fiddling with wasn't that... It was simple and kind of dark. It wouldn't shine too much and draw too much attention. It was like it was picked specifically for him by someone who knew him deeply and saw him in ways he could never believe.

Robert was sometimes too bloody fucking perfect.

And Aaron felt himself fall harder even as his mind just spun.

And he wondered how much more spinning he could take.

He had tailspinned at the idea of marriage and slowly realized he was leaning toward it, but he wasn't ready to jump -- then he'd wondered why Robert hadn't already jumped. His fucking go-getter, take what he wanted, boyfriend...

And he'd gotten pissed off he hadn't been proposed to yet and hurt. And hurt in a way that spun him harder and showed him just how much he wanted it -- wanted something he'd never given much thought to.

Because that chavvy kid was sometimes deep inside him scoffing at the idea he could ever be happy.

Aaron let out a breath and slowly pushed the ring onto his left ring finger. His heart was pounding, and he felt too in tune with the weight of it and the feel of it, and he started fiddling with it again but didn't take it off...

"Oh my god! He proposed? You proposed?"

Aaron jumped and stared at the waitress in panic. "No..." he hurriedly took the ring off.

"Oh, are you doing it today?"

He made a series of odd sounds that made him sound a bit like the ducks in the pond outside.

The waitress smiled and made the motion of sealed lips. "Won't tell a soul."

He gulped as she walked away, then he heard the bell for the door to the ice cream shop and felt a bit of relief at the sight of Sarah Sugden. She smiled at him as she walked down to the booth he'd chosen and slipped across from him, putting her purse on the table before nailing him with a worried look."What is wrong?"

He thought about it, denying it, but her eyebrow shot up.

He pulled the ring he'd shoved into his jeans pocket out, then he pulled the box with the other ring out of his hoodie pocket and put them both on the table and tried to figure out exactly what his question was... Or if he even had a question. Or if he was just screaming for help.

"Did Robert..." Sarah started but stopped. "No, look at you."

Aaron bit his lip. "Found them in his car."

"Ok."

Aaron fidgeted and started to play with the ring meant for him.

Sarah stayed quiet.

It was infuriating, but what else had he expected. "I just didn't know who else to..."

"Tell?"

"Go to," Aaron said softly.

And Sarah's face went soft. "You can always come to me for anything."

Aaron let out a breath. "Did I fuck this up?"

Sarah shook her head, confused.

"I mean... Was he gonna ask me, and I fucked it up?"

Sarah breathed, and that was all Aaron needed to know. It'd been rolling around in his head. Because before he found the rings, underneath the hurt he'd felt for Robert not proposing was the fear he almost had...

And he could roll around in a billion amazing memories when it may have happened, and he could remember too many little moments of him shitting on the idea of marriage.

It was amazing how an opinion could change.

But his heart changed.

"When?" he asked.

"Maybe you should ask, Robert."

Aaron shook his head and sighed.

"I will tell you it was a while ago...finding out about Seb slowed down his plans a bit."

"What?" he barked out far too loud. "That long ago, he wanted..."

She nodded.

Aaron groaned, but half wondered if he would've said no then like a fool.

"Aaron?" Sarah reached out her hand and touched his arm. "What are you going to do?"

Aaron pulled out his phone and checked the time. "I have twenty minutes to decide."

Sarah chuckled.

"I..." he slid the ring he held over to her. "Look inside."

She picked it up, and he watched her read the inscription that took up all the space inside the ring.

He still felt the shiver and goosebumps the words created when he read them.

My beautiful husband, I love you, Robert.

Sarah slid the ring back to him. "You know what you're going to do."

Aaron flagged over the waitress.

She showed up grinning like a loon. "Yes?"

"I need the chocolate on chocolate sundae and a cone of rocky road."

She nodded.

Sarah giggled.

"She caught me with the rings." Aaron blushed.

"Well, I better leave, but I want you boys at the house tonight," Sarah said as she stood.

He nodded.

She leaned down and kissed his cheek.

Somehow it calmed him down.

~~~

Was that his mum? Robert frowned and looked in his windshield mirror at the car leaving the ice cream shop's parking lot. They'd turned the corner too fast, but he could've sworn that was his mum's car. He shook his head and checked the time. He was early. It was fifty-fifty if Aaron would even be there yet -- despite the one asking Robert to meet him for his lunch break.

Robert was nervous. Aaron had been a bit off for weeks, but the night before, Aaron felt downright bonkers. He kept staring at Robert, looking away, starting a sentence, and stopping. He kept lobbing off any attempts to communicate, and Robert spent the night away, listening to Aaron's very awake breathing...

And he couldn't take it anymore. If Aaron wasn't using this lunch break to come clean to him about what was going on? What was possibly wrong with their relationship? Or with Aaron? Or what Robert may have done, he would have to force it.

He was done with space.

Them not being on the same page felt fundamentally wrong.

He felt like his whole being was off because they were off.

He checked his hair a bit before getting out of his car and making his way inside. He spotted Aaron and Mandy, one of the regular waitresses putting a sundae down on the table. He smiled, recognizing it as his favorite, and he smiled when he saw Aaron was taking a bit of a bite out of a rocky road ice cream cone...

Their first date here.

That'd been what Aaron ordered.

Maybe they were less off than he thought?

He slid in and grinned, pulling his sundae closer before even saying hello.

Aaron chuckled. "You love chocolate more than me."

"I do not," Robert laughed. "I haven't eaten."

"Alright..." Aaron shook his head, but he bit his lip.

Robert sighed.

"It's missing something, though, yeah?"

"What?"

"The sundae."

Robert looked at it and shrugged. "So, what, no cherry."

"How about this..." Aaron reached out and dropped something on top of the sundae.

And Robert couldn't process what he was seeing. It looked like a ring. It looked like the ring he'd bought... one of two rings. It looked like the rings he'd brought for them that he still dreamed about slipping onto Aaron's finger...

He looked from it to Aaron, who looked terrified, but there was something else in his eyes, something warm and hopeful and homey...

"Aaron?" Robert breathed.

"You're the wordy one," Aaron spit out. "I have it on good authority these were in your car 'cause I fucked this up... nearly a year ago? But um, I'm not the same now, you... you make me better, and I..." Aaron ran out of breath.

"Yes," Robert breathed.

"What?" Aaron stared at him.

"You are asking?" Robert said.

"You bought them..." Aaron accused.

Robert chuckled and picked the ring off the sundae. He frowned and picked up a napkin. "You know these were expensive."

"Inscription on mine must've been a lot..." Aaron breathed.

And Robert lost his.

They just locked eyes.

Robert reached out his hand. "Where is it, yours?"

Aaron put his ice cream cone onto a plate and fiddled with his pockets. It felt like it took forever for Robert. But then a ring dropped onto the table.

Robert picked it up, took Aaron's hand, and slid on the ring. "So, Aaron Dingle? Will you be my husband?"

Aaron breathed heavily but took Robert's cleaned-up ring, slid it onto his finger, and nodded profusely. And Robert leaned over the table, grabbed the collar of his hoodie, and pulled him into a hard kiss.

And clapping burst out around them.

Aaron turned beet red.

But Robert felt smug and giddy. He didn't care who knew. He wanted the world to know. He grinned at the waitstaff and the other customers before taking Aaron's hand to yank him out of the spotlight.

They walked outside and toward the duck pond.

Hands tight.

And Robert started to wonder if he was dreaming, so he pulled Aaron toward him again and kissed him. Hands on his face, and he felt Aaron climb up his arms, and he knew it was real because the kisses in his dreams never felt solid and perfect.

Real and forever.

"Aaron," Robert breathed as their lips parted. "I love you."

He was pulled into a hug, and he felt Aaron's mouth near his ear. "Gonna inscribe your ring with: You make everything better, I love you."

Chapter Text

He was going to be murdered by his cousin, then his parents, then his aunt, and he frowned as more and more Dingles occurred to him too. At least the Sugden side is smaller, though possibly more murderous. Seb shook his head and parked his car in the small church's parking lot, and got out of the car. He stood up, tried to straighten out his jacket, and checked on his tie. He tried to look in the reflection and hoped he looked somewhat presentable.

Julie was going to kill him. And there was a strong possibility there would be nothing left for the rest of the family to work with. He ran his hand through his hair and then regretted it. Now it was probably messed up. He sighed and sprinted toward the church.

He walked in through the back like he'd been told and saw no one. Which upped his anxiety. He groaned and started walking forward even though he didn't know where he was going.

"You're late," a voice drawled.

And shot right down his spine.

He turned.

Chase stood there. Julie's soon-to-be husband's best mate and someone Seb thought he hated. Hated and wanted to punch. Or kiss. It turned out that kissing him was rather fantastic. He felt his cheeks blush and, for the millionth time, wondering what he was doing...

Or not doing.

He wasn't sure what they were.

They kept sneaking around, and they kept using phrases like no strings.
He wasn't sure.

Chase walked up toward him and shook his head. "Julie's being calmed down by your father."

"Which one?"

"Robert."

Seb nodded. "She might not kill me then."

Chase smirked and reached out. "Let me fix this."

Seb felt like he couldn't breathe as Chase's fingers carded into his hair. Flashes of those hands in his hair and very different circumstances rushed through him, and he ended up repeating to himself that he was in a church.

"Yeah, that's not better."

"I was wondering why you thought you had hair skills."

Chase shrugged. "You clean up good, Sugden."

Seb looked down and wished he had inherited his dad's ability to take a compliment.

"You do," Chase's voice was husky and closer to his ear.

Seb looked up into warm brown eyes.

A throat cleared.

They turned away from each other quickly, taking large steps back, but Seb felt only relief as he met his papa's eyes. Aaron looked a mixture of irritated and relieved at the sight of him. "Where have you been?"

Seb felt like a heel. An awful heel. Because his only excuse was a crisis.

He and Julie were a pair. She was more like a twin sister in his head than his cousin. They went through school together, graduated together, traveled the world together after university, and now she was getting married, and he was...

He glanced at Chase.

He was in a nebulous friends with benefits sneaking around relationship.

"I got here," he said instead, and his papa's face softened, but he felt other eyes on him, and he stole a glance at Chase and saw concern, and it threw him, so he looked away.

"She's just down the hall to the left and waiting for her best person."

Seb nodded and started to take off.

But his father's arm caught his arm, and he sighed. "Let me fix your tie. After that, your dad will have a fit..."

Seb giggled.

Aaron fixed him up, straightened his lapels, and searched Seb's eyes.

Seb felt instantly safe.

"You'll be ok," Aaron whispered.

Seb nodded.

~~~

He got drunk.

He got really drunk.

Spinning world drunk.

And afraid the world would fly out of his throat drunk.

Then there were hands, strong and hard, yanking him outside into cool air and somehow helping him swallow cool water. He gulped it and felt like he was falling until a strong arm swung around his shoulders and held tight.

"You gotta sober up. There is the toast."

"Shit...shit..." Seb hated himself.

"What's going on?" Chase's voice felt like it was inside him.

"Just...falling behind."

"What?"

"I'm falling behind," Seb turned and looked at his... his what? He looked at the face before him and thought it was perfect. Even double and fuzzy. "I can't ruin this day for her."

"You won't... drink."

More water hit his lips.

He felt a hand on the back of his neck.

"We have thirty minutes."

"That's not long enough."

"I'll get some food," Chase started to get up.

Seb grabbed at him. "No, no, you can't leave me. I'll fall through the world."

"Alright..." and that solid weight was back anchoring him.

Seb leaned into it.

"I'm jealous of ya, you know."

Seb stared at him, confused.

"Your a celeb status chef at your restaurant."

"Aunt's..."

"Yours. You have an ice cream line..."

"That's a family business."

"About that ice cream tradition at that place, you took me..."

"Shh..." Seb glanced around.

Chase smiled. "Our secrets are safe."

"I'm just a carpenter who works for another carpenter. So you have all these things."

"It's not enough..." Seb breathed and looked at Chase.

Chase met his eyes, and suddenly things stopped spinning.

He wasn't sure how long they sat like that.

"Seb..."

He jolted, his dad's voice deep and resonant, and his hangover headache was already starting. He stood up, palms on his trouser, happy he didn't lose his balance. His Dad looked super smart in his suit, his blonde hair perfect, and Seb felt he should be matching him but knew he wasn't.

"Seb..." his dad's voice was softer.

"I better get in..." Chase muttered and hurried inside.

Seb forced himself not to follow him with his eyes.

He felt his dad's hands on his shoulders. His dad had big hands, which he remembered holding when he was tiny and thinking they would always keep him safe. It was doing that again, really. He looked up and met soft eyes...

"I was a mess on Vic's wedding day."

"You were?"

"Yeah, got sloshed."

"Did you throw up during your speech?"

"No."

"How."

"Aaron..." Robert said softly.

"Of course."

"We weren't... really together yet. But we were building. I think maybe it was that day I knew."

"Oh."

"And your grandmum Sarah....she knew too."

Seb stared at him. "What?"

Robert just smiled. "I think you have the lifeline you need. But you are out of time to get more sober. Come on..."

Seb nodded.

"And Seb?"

"Yeah."

"There is no right way to do life."

"But..."

"There isn't, alright, trust me. I had to find my own way. You will. Stop putting so much pressure on yourself, alright? I love ya."

"Love ya too, Dad."

Robert shoved him toward his cousin.

Julie grinned.

Seb took a breath, walked forward, and took the glass of champagne his little sister Lottie handed him. He looked at all the people and felt a wave of stage fright. He hated talking in front of people. He was like his papa like that, but he searched out the ground for brown eyes. And found them close by, and why wouldn't he be. He was the other best person...

He stared at them for a minute.

And took a breath.

~~~

Aaron watched Robert tuck a blanket around Sarah, where she sat in her wheelchair near the stage, and whisper something in her ear that made her cackle before he kissed her cheek and walked over to him. Aaron took his hand and pulled him away from the crowd. Both because he needed a break from it and because they needed to have a conversation.

Well, they'd been having one, but in shorthand and without words.

But he wanted to word it.

He stopped them so they could look back over the reception. Then, at their extended family, he sought out all four of their kids. Seb, his oldest, was currently trying to use chocolate biscuits to soak up the amount of alcohol he'd consumed and not look directly in the direction of the other best man. But that could wait a minute...

He found Lottie dancing with her girlfriend, they were only seventeen, and they were giggling and all dressed up and happy. And it just made him happy too. Annie was in the corner, her glasses slipping down her nose, and reading a book. Their quiet one. Then there was Asher, who insisted on dancing with Julie and cutting in between her and her husband. He was thankful Ted was putting up with it and told himself he'd collect their youngest in a bit...

It was the oldest he was a bit more worried about. Though not too much.

"How long do you think it's been going on?"

"Long enough they're in love, not long enough they know," Robert chuckled.

"We didn't."

"It's funny, isn't it."

"What?"

"He's sneaking around with someone, pretending it means less than it does, just like we did..."

Aaron chuckled. "At least he isn't going around saying he's dating someone named Chandler, and Chase isn't talking about a Seymour or something."

Robert cackled in a way that sounded a lot like Sarah.

"Think he is the one?"

"With the way he dragged Seb out of him to save him from himself..." Robert smiled. "Might be...you saved me that night."

Aaron blushed.

"Husband, are you blushing?"

Aaron wiped at his eyes. "Shut up."

"Never."

"Promise?"

"Marry me?" Robert whispered.

"What?"

"It's our anniversary in four months. Let's renew our vows..."

Aaron shook his head, but he wasn't saying no. "Yeah, alright... let's not make a big do..."

"No...just the kids. Only Seb got to be at the first one."

"Yeah, just our kids."

"And maybe Chase."

"If they're admitting it."

"If they are."

Robert threaded their fingers. "You came out of nowhere, but we got here."

"We got here," Aaron smiled.

"DADS..." Seb yelled.

They looked over.

All their kids were together, Lottie with her fancy camera.

"We want a family selfie!" Asher yelled.

"We're coming."

"You can be soppy in it," Seb chuckled. "Since you're already being."

The End.