Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Chapter One: July-September 2013

Kit looked at the squat brown-brick building in front him, and then back at Tessa. She caught his eye, her mouth quirking up.

“So, is this where I give you the pep talk?” she asked. “As you know, I never attended myself, and James got expelled fairly quickly from the Academy-- so I’m not sure I have all that much wisdom but we can give it a try.”

“Nope, not at all,” said Kit, unbuckling his seatbelt, and grabbing the bag at his feet. “I’ll be fine.”

“Of course you will,” Tessa replied, a fond note creeping into her voice and Kit ducked his head, pleased at the trust she had in him.

Mina gurgled happily in the backseat, and Kit looked back at her with a smile.

“Don’t worry, I’m a Herondale, a Shadowhunter, a former Shadow Market vendor and… probably should have a minor criminal record if we’re honest. I think I can handle a British high school,” Kit said with a winning grin, as he opened the car door.

“Bye Min-Min, bye Tessa,” he said. He leaned into the door. “I also know about the bet that Jace and Jem made about how long I would last and-” he smiled even wider. “I plan to make them both lose.”

Tessa winked at him, and looked back at Mina. “All right then. I think we’re set here. Mina mine- let’s get on with our busy day of shopping and visiting the local library.” She turned her attention back to Kit briefly. “Do you want me to pick you up at half three?”

Kit shook his head. “I’ll take the bus back to the village and then walk. If there’s one thing I learned from high school movies, it’s that while you can get your pare- adults to drop you off, only losers get picked up after school. I should probably start off on the right foot.”

Tessa nodded at that. “Let’s go with the experts then,” she said mock-gravely. “See you after school. And have fun,” she said, with a tiny wave.

Kit straightened up and turned towards his new school. Altofts Sixth Form. “All right, let’s do this,” he muttered to himself as he walked towards the entrance.

*

It had all started with his early morning running. A terrible habit to have picked up. One that Jem had called him on back early in the summer when he had agreed to train with Kit.

Kit had actually taken to getting up early back in the winter. He hadn’t admitted it to Jem and Tessa, but his nightmares - swirling terrors of both mantid demons and black shapes with white burning eyes that had him waking up gasping and drenched in sweat - combined with the lack of central heating that turned his room into a freezer until the heat turned on again at seven... it just wasn’t conducive to sleeping in.

At first he had just tried to walk downstairs to get snacks from the kitchen and watch some tv. But he realised soon after Mina was born that any sound would be liable to wake her, given the bat-eared hearing that babies seemed to have. And he didn’t want to be the cause of further sleeplessness for Jem and Tessa.

So he started slipping down the back staircase by his room, into the garden. And well… no use freezing in the garden and he still had delusions he might still want to be a full proper Shadowhunter someday, or at very least, not die horribly when/if this whole First Heir thing caught up to him. It was also probably worth being fast enough to run away if he needed to.

And he had to admit, he liked it, Plus, the scenery was beautiful, given that Cirenworth was located close to the edge of Dartmoor. Running alongside the narrow, suicidal-for-more-than-one-car lanes, with trees forming tangled green arcs overhead, across old stone bridges into ancient woods and up high, rolling sparse hills, he had plenty of other things to look at, and not think about how he had messed things up, until the aching in his legs and burning in his lungs made him stop. Which was, admittingly, getting rarer, even in the occasional stifling heat of July.

He had a whole route figured out now, four months in. Which was why, Kit admitted to himself, he was irritated that someone else had found a similar path.

It was only for about two miles just on the outskirts of the village but Kit could see him out of the corner of his eye most days this last week.

He was taller than Kit (most guys his own age seemed to be, Kit noted sadly) and he usually wore what looked like a basketball jersey, shorter shorts than Kit figured most American teen boys would be comfy with, and had oversized headphones either on his head or around his neck. Other than that, he didn’t remind Kit of anyone.

The first time, the other boy had nodded at him in a friendly way as Kit had run past the tree where the boy was stretching, his white teeth flashing briefly in his dark-skinned face. Kit had nodded back and kept on running. It wasn’t that he wanted to be unfriendly… but he hadn’t really thought about making new friends, and figured given his background of Shadowhunter and part of a long-lost line of faerie royalty, it might be harder to relate to any new ones, especially mundanes.

Plus, he wasn’t sure he was that great of a friend, given the mess that had happened at the LA Institute. So he had been distant to any friendly overtures from local teens his age since he had arrived at Cirenworth, although he had to admit, he hadn’t minded the attention the giggling squad of girls outside the bakery gave him.

But a week into this new shadow, Kit had rounded a particularly tricky corner on the narrow path and found the other boy, frozen in place. And Kit could immediately see why. He was surrounded by cows.

Now, cows might not seem like a dangerous situation but after nearly being trampled by an angry bull early on in his explorations of the Devon countryside, Kit was inclined to give any other bovines as far a berth as he could while running. Or in any other situation honestly.

Kit met the other boy’s eyes. “You er- ok?” he called.

“Ahh. Maybe?” The boy looked a bit panicked as two cows started moving towards him, one cutting him off from the fence that Kit could see he was trying to inch towards.

Kit made his decision. “Hey cows!” he shouted. The cows ignored him. Kit summoned up his courage and started jogging towards the small herd, waving his arms. “You heifers! You lazy… demonic spawn!”

The boy goggled at him and Kit narrowed his eyes. “Hop the fence!” he yelled, as a couple cows started moving towards him. Kit gulped and summoned all his courage and ran directly towards him, hoping that the cow in the way would move and he wouldn’t have to dodge it or worse, attempt a leap over it. It did, and Kit stopped to grab at the boy’s arm, who finally started moving. They both scrambled up over the wide, stone fence to the next field over, which was thankfully cow-less.

“Thanks,” the boy said, as they both climbed down. “That would’ve been an embarrassing end.” He grinned, brushing off the dirt from his shorts. “I’m Ade.”

“Kit,” Kit answered cautiously, as the adrenaline in his system slowly started to leave.

“Yeah, I’ve seen you around,” Ade said. “Mate, you’re fast.”

Kit thought back to his time in the LA Institute and watching Emma run swiftly over miles of sandy beach, and even the time that he and the twins had run along the Thames to escape the Riders of Manan. He was slow, compared to others. “No, not really.”

“Ooh, an American! Didn’t expect that,” Ade whistled, disentangling his headphones from his short-cropped black curls as they both started walking towards the other side of the field to rejoin the road. “You here with your family on holiday?”

“No,” said Kit shortly. “I live just outside Sefton Crufts.” He glanced over, wondering if Ade knew about Cirenworth. A lot of the locals in the village did, and he knew that Tessa and Jem (alongside Mina) had basically gathered a fan club.

“No joke?” Ade said. “That’s cool. I live in...” He named a village that Kit thought he remembered was a few miles back. “What high school did you go to?”

“Oh, I erm- homeschooled,” Kit mumbled, looking down. Time for the lies.

Ade nodded. “I see.” They trudged through some bushes. At the edge of the road, Ade looked at Kit and gestured towards the buildings off in the distance. “Hey, given that you basically saved my life from… what was it you called them…. Demonic cow spawn? Do you want to get breakfast with me at ‘spoons? We’re pretty close to it - I’ll pay. ”

Kit started to shake his head but at that point, his stomach betrayed him and made a loud gurgling sound, reminding him that he had just run the better part of eight miles and had been up since six. Ade let out a big laugh. “Hah, you can’t argue with that, man,” he said, pointing at Kit’s midsection. “Let’s go eat.”

*

“Wow, this is really good,” Kit said, shovelling in the eggs and bacon.

Ade looked at him over a similar pile of breakfast, his friendly brown eyes puzzled. “Yeah, of course,” as if it were obvious. “Have you never had a Wetherspoons breakfast? When did you move here?”

“Last fall,” Kit said, figuring that as long as he stuck to the basics, he could manage it. “And no, I haven’t. But my- Jem and Tessa have taken me to the Bull and Hart. Food is also good there.”

“Ah,” Ade nodded wisely. “The gastropub,” he looked Kit over, as if assessing him. “Yeah, that tracks. I’m glad to give you some introduction to proper English pub food then.”

Kit thought that he had been vaguely insulted - or at least labelled. He changed the topic. “I’ve been running that route for a few months now. I only just saw you on it last week. Did you just move here too?”

Ade shook his head. “Nah, I’m not local either. But I’ve been here longer than you. My parents moved us down from London so my mum could take over a GP practice, but it was before I started GCSE’s.” He speared a couple of sausages and stuffed them in his mouth, chewing. He continued. “Football season starts in a couple weeks, and I’m starting at Altofts College and want to be on first squad. So I thought I should work on my endurance. Kinda spent most of the spring prepping for exams.” He lowered his voice. “I plan to go to Kings for medicine so was kind of a nerd for most of last year.”

Kit had only understood about half of the previous sentences but he nodded. “Plus you want to be able to outrun any further cow-based incidents,” he cracked.

Ade grinned cockily. “Well, let’s see. But I figured you seem to have that route down- how about you be my cow-guard?”

“If you’ll get my breakfast, sure,” Kit said, his mouth full of toast.

“It’s a deal Kit…” Ade trailed off.

“Kit Herondale,” Kit answered.

*

After that, while Kit and Ade kept to their respective routes, and were able to avoid further herds of cows, they started meeting up for Wetherspoons’ breakfasts a few times a week with the healthy appetite of the teenage boys they were. There they discovered that they while they didn’t support the same football teams (Kit didn’t understand the obsession really, but had adopted the same team Jem supported - Liverpool - and Ade was a hardcore Millwall fan), they had other common interests, including British absurdist comedies like Peep Show, the IT Crowd and the In-Betweeners.

Until the day that the pub greeted them with a ‘No electricity’ sign and Kit decided to invite Ade back to Cirenworth. He had told Jem and Tessa about Ade after the first couple of meetings, and while they were their typical low-pressure selves, Kit thought they were happy that he had made a friend and told Kit to invite him around sometime.

“Whoa, I had heard…” Ade said, trailing off as they walked up the long yard to the white-washed manor house, rain drizzling down the grey slates. English weather in August - one hour it was warm and sunny, and then the next like mid-November. “You like… a long-lost American heir to some posh Downton Abbey shit?”

Kit let out a rude noise. “As if.” He suddenly became nervous though. There were rarely mundanes in the house - sometimes builders, given Tessa and Jem were still making the place habitable, plus a couple of mums and babies sometimes from Tessa’s local baby group. It’s not as if Ade or anyone could tell that he was anything other than a normal person. Well… as long as they avoided the training room. And maybe keep Ade away from the old family photos. Tessa looked a bit too ageless at times, Kit thought.

But Kit hadn’t needed to worry, the visit went really well. Jem and Mina had made their usual pilgrimage to the bakery, and they had all sat in the now-sunny garden and feasted on pastries, thick, buttery toast and fresh orange juice. Ade had appropriately complimented Mina: “Your sister’s really cute. Almost as cute as my nieces.” And had asked polite enough questions to the lies that Jem and Tessa told him about what brought them to England and Cirenworth. “So you’re like- an art dealer, that’s really cool.” And had given them enough about his own background: “Yeah, so like my mum’s a GP, she moved here after studying medicine in Lagos and my dad was in the army but now he does security installations for rich footballers and bankers with second homes near Dartmoor. My sisters live in London- yeah, I’m the youngest. I can’t wait to go back to London. Devon’s okay but it’s not the city.”

He said with the fervor of a true believer and Kit remembered his brief time in London. He hadn’t been back since… well, since he had left with the Blackthorns.

He was briefly lost in his memories that he almost missed the next part of the conversation.

“Kit should come study at Altofts,” Ade said. “I know it’s probably not the same as the American system but it has a really good reputation- they sent like, three people to Oxbridge last year. And lots to Exeter, and the London unis.”

“I think that’s up to Kit,” Jem said, with a small smile, as he sipped his coffee.

Kit was confused. Attend a mundane high school? That had never been brought up. He cleared his throat. “Hey- should we go up to my room? I got Call of Duty on my playstation.”

“Yeah, tight,” Ade said cheerfully. “Thanks for breakfast,” he said nodding to Jem and Tessa, who were both looking bemused.

*

“He has a point,” Jem said, later on, as they finished up in the garden from their daily training regime.

Kit looked up from where he was currently doubled over in pain. Jem had run him hard today- they had ended with some hand-to-hand combat, and Jem had finished off by throwing him in some kind of super harsh judo flip. Kit was fairly sure he needed an iratze for his ribs...“What?”

“Your friend. You’re training with me but there’s only so much Shadowhunter training that we can do in a day- plus, I still have other responsibilities that I’ll need to see to. Going to this college could be a good thing.”

Oh. Kit’s chest went tight. He knew that Jem had other errands and things he needed to see to. He hadn’t realised that the training might be taking up too much of his time.

“And you can meet other kids your age,” Tessa called in her low, musical voice. She and Mina had been sitting on a plaid blanket a little ways off from the cleared training ground.

“You mean, you think I can pull off the dual roles of training for epic battles between good and evil and still do my calculus homework?” Kit said sarcastically but he started to feel a twinge of excitement. It wasn’t that he had been bored this past winter - he and Tessa had done enough homeschooling ahead of Mina’s birth and he had spent a lot of quality time wallowing in his room and shooting out his feelings on his playstation… but he wasn’t sure he could do that for a second winter in a row.

Tessa grinned. “Buffy did it. I think you could.”

“Heh, well- you’d probably know, right?” Kit shot back.

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Tessa said slowly, her eyebrows raising.

“C’mon- you mean in the past century, you never pulled an Edward Cullen and went to high school again?” Kit asked sceptically.

“Read the book,” Tessa said automatically, as she shook her head and pulled Mina up into her lap. But a blush emerged on her cheeks and Kit saw an opening.

“Saw the movie,” Kit replied, fascinated. “Hah, you did! Nothing to be ashamed about, Tessa. I bet there’s a reason that so many vampire movies do it.”

Jem watched as they went back and forth, his face a study of confusion, as it so often did when they traded pop culture quips.

“No, I never attended a high school,” Tessa corrected him. “But I… may have a few English degrees.”

Jem looked at her fondly. “I know you did Cambridge in the 90s…” he said. “But what were the other ones?”

“Berkeley in 1965, and Columbia in the late 80s,” Tessa replied. “But the point is, Kit. You’re not a warlock. This is your chance to have a typical high school experience.”

“Shouldn’t I be having a typical Shadowhunter teen experience?”

Jem and Tess exchanged looks. “Well…” Tessa said gently. “There’s not really a typical experience but in terms of the more usual ones… most go to either the Academy, or are tutored in their local Institute.”

“Neither which are an option for me,” Kit said, suddenly feeling a bit bitter. “I need to avoid most Downworld or Shadowhunter places until we know more about the First Heir stuff.”

Jem was sympathetic. “We would’ve liked to have helped you with this, Kit. We did mean to get you a tutor but given the… upheaval in the last year with the Cohort… there are fewer Shadowhunters around anyway, and many of them are tied to their Institute or are helping out with the reformed Academy in New York.”

“I’m enjoying training with you, Jem,” Kit said slowly, not sure where the conversation was going. Did Jem want to stop?

Jem smiled. “I know. I am too. And I think it’s going well- and we’ll continue with it.” He stepped closer to Kit, and clapped a hand on his shoulder. “But… I think it’s good to not just focus on Shadowhunter education to the exclusion of everything else.”

His eyes took on a sudden, far away look, and Kit thought he saw some sorrow pass through them. “Given the events of the past few years- I think there are going to be more changes and upheaval coming for Shadowhunters and the Downworld. Having some who understand both the Shadowhunter and mundane world, and who can bridge the two cultures and their histories- that will help us all navigate through it.”

Kit thought back to some of the conversations he had had with members of the Cohort, and even with Emma and the Blackthorns, all of whom had been fairly ignorant of twentieth century history and some of the parallels that were currently happening within Shadowhunter society.

He took a deep breath. “Yeah- I get that. When you put it that way- the hard job of getting high and making out with people under the bleachers to be this noble task…” he held his hand up, as he saw both Jem and Tessa take synchronised breaths as if to respond. “Jokes- I’m in.”

They both smiled. “We can go into Totnes tomorrow and pick you up a syllabus so you can choose your courses,” Tessa said, as Mina drooled on her shoulder. Kit didn’t think that was the right wording but he nodded.

“Oh, and don’t think if you go, you’re going to get that light a treatment on your Shadowhunter training. I’ve been in contact with several Institutes and people we know… it’ll be good for you to have exposure to different ways of fighting and training,” Jem informed him. “So- starting from next month, we’ll be hosting several guest tutors for you,” his smile had a wicked edge. “It’ll be fun, trust me.”

Kit gulped. “Yay?”

*

So, that was how, he, Kit Herondale, future Shadowhunter extraordinaire and heir to the First Heir or whatever, ended up at a sixth form college in South Devon. It wasn’t going to be entirely like he had seen in movies- this seemed more like a cross between community college and high school, Kit thought, as he pulled out the schedule he had been given from the front office. The secretary had almost swooned when he walked in, telling him she loved his accent and so Kit left feeling pretty smug. But that smugness had quickly drained away as other people streamed around him and he tried to figure out what the double and single blocks meant, and what the hell was his tutor group…?

“Yo, Herondale!” he heard a voice call. Kit looked up and saw Ade approaching. Kit had texted him earlier.

“You’re here,” Ade said, after he had clapped Kit on the back in greeting. “Noice.” He gestured to his friends around him. “This is Eamonn, Tom and Ben. Lads- this is Kit Herondale. He’s an American, from Los Angeles.”

The other boys looked vaguely impressed, and he made small talk with them as they threaded their way through the busy halls. Ade checked Kit’s schedule. “Awesome- we’re in the same tutor group, although…” his eyes danced down the page. “Nothing else-” he handed it back to back to Kit. “Not surprising though- I’m on a one way ticket study medicine in London with Chemistry, Bio, Physics and Maths and you’re- an artsy lad,” he said, with a friendly grin. “Which is good, no rivalry between us.”

“Yeah,” Kit mumbled. He had chosen Art (he wanted photography but it hadn’t been offered as a full A-Level), English Literature (for Tessa and because he actually did like reading the classics, he had discovered), History (because someone had to know about mundane history, according to Jem) and Film Studies (because duh).

Kit and Ade split off from the rest of his friends and went into a classroom.

The tutor group seemed to be like the American version of a homeroom, and Kit relaxed into his seat as the teacher in the front of the class droned on about regulations and expectations. As he leaned back in his chair, he took stock of his new classmates.

“Psst,” came a hiss from his right. Kit looked over, and saw a girl with brown hair cut in a severe bob smile at him. He smiled back; he planned to unleash the full Herondale charm at this school.

“I like your tattoo,” she whispered, pointing at his hand.

Kit froze. He looked straight ahead, ignoring her. Before heading out of the house in the morning, he had spent time painstakingly drawing a glamour rune on his arm, to hide his other runes, including the very obvious Voyance one.

Shit. There were mundanes here in the school with the Sight. Well… that was going to make things interesting…

*

To be continued...

Chapter Text

October-December 2013

“I don’t understand what I did to you,” said the voice behind him.

Kit tensed as he pivoted around, his balance teetering on the narrow wooden fencing in front of the bus stop.

Ellie, the girl who could see his runes even if they were hidden with glamour, was standing in front of him. He was naturally wary of her, given that fact, but nothing over the past few weeks had made him think that she had any further knowledge of the Shadow World. Or if she did, she was playing a long game.

“You did nothing,” he said, dismounting with what he hoped was his natural Shadowhunter grace. He stumbled a bit but he blamed the long grass at the edges of the fence. He smiled what he hoped was a bland, welcoming smile. The kind that his dad had taught him to master years ago for annoying Market customers. “We’re all good.”

“Okay but…” Ellie hooked her bobbed hair behind her ears. It was now a bright magenta colour, and the colour change highlighted bright blue eyes that were examining him head to toe, as if she were a scientist and Kit an interesting new specimen. “There’s just some kind of weird vibes I’m getting.”

“I just don’t think we have that much in common,” Kit said, looking at his phone, hoping that the local bus was due soon. No such luck- he still had ten minutes. And there was no one else at the bus stop- most students lived closer to the centre of town and didn’t have to take a forty minute bus ride home through winding countryside.

“Is it because you’re gay?”

Kit started. “What?” He crossed his arms. What was this conversation anyway? He was getting whiplash from it, and he suspected Ellie had barely started. They had had some very casual conversations in class but he didn’t think it had warranted this much interrogation.

“I don’t care- look, I’m an actress, or I’m going to be. I have a good gaydar,” said Ellie earnestly.

“Noooo,” Kit said slowly. This was not where he had expected this interaction to go. “And for the record- I’m not gay.”

The sceptical look on Ellie’s face made Kit realise he was going to have to spell it out. Luckily, he had had a winter of isolation, a good internet connection, and the example of Mark Blackthorn and Kieran to help him realise what he was. “I like both girls and guys- so, I’m bi.”

He watched her reaction. As far as he had heard from Ade, Ellie was fairly popular but a bit of a gossip, so he had no doubt that that news would spread rapidly. He winced- he wasn’t entirely what Ade and his friends would think but hey, it was 2013 so fingers crossed there wouldn’t be too much homophobia around.

It had been almost a month and Kit was starting to find his rhythm at school- no, college, he internally corrected himself. School here in England was for younger kids. He knew he needed to keep a low profile but he also wanted to have friends. And he liked hanging out with Ade, and Ben and Eamonn, and he was sure there would be others. And Ellie was unfortunately in two of his classes - Film Studies and English Literature, so he was probably going to have to play nice if he didn’t want to avoid her all year now.

“Oohh,” Ellie said, blinking. “Ace - that’s very drama of you.” But she didn’t look entirely satisfied with that revelation.

“So yeah, why do you care what a weird, bi American kid thinks of you?” he asked.

“You’re a mystery, Kit Herondale,” Ellie said, watching him with a small smile that showed off a deep dimple in her right cheek.

Kit shrugged and continued with the bland smile, and he could see a flash of irritation cross her face.

“I like mysteries,” she said. “I like solving them…” and she started to saunter away.

Kit sighed… great, trying to act casual had backfired spectacularly here. He tried to think of a way to keep the situation from spiralling into her looking into him further.

“Wait, Ellie…” he called out, suddenly hit by inspiration. This could work- and maybe even keep her off track if he ever had anything to hide further.

She looked back, her bag slipping off her shoulder. “Yeah?”

“I’ll tell you but you have to promise you won’t spread it around,” he said.

He held out his hand, pointing to the Voyance rune. “You see this mark?”

She came to stand beside him. “Of course- it’s the one I complimented you on.”

“Yeah, it’s from a cult,” Kit said, internally apologising to all the Shadowhunters he knew. On the other hand… where was the lie?

“You know that I’m from LA, right? I had to leave because of that,” he nodded. “I have other marks but I er…” he thought fast about how he might be able to explain the disappearing runes he was likely to use. “I sometimes use make-up to hide them.”

“Whoooa,” Ellie breathed. “That’s- messed up.” She looked at him, her suspicion dissolving into sympathy. “Did your rich cousins also escape the cult? Did you all get financial compensation- is that why you live in that big manor?”

Right, Ellie knew more than he thought about his life.

“No,” Kit said hastily. “But they’ve been great- after the… events. But when you complimented my tattoos, it brought back a lot of hidden feelings.”

“You poor thing,” Ellie said, hovering and almost looked like she wanted to reach out and touch the rune but was restraining herself.

“So… I’d appreciate it if you wouldn’t say anything else at school about them,” Kit said.

Ellie nodded. “Of course- you have my solemn promise,” she straightened up and made a big cross against her heart. She also leaned forward and gave Kit a big hug, and Kit was so surprised that he didn’t even have time to stiffen or push her away.

“Thank you for telling me,” she whispered against his ear, and Kit was momentarily baffled by why he could smell cotton candy, before realising it was her perfume.

She let him go, hiking her bag up again, and started walking off. “See you on Thursday for English Lit doubles! I’ll save you a seat.”

Kit watched her go, feeling bewildered but also smug. Julian Blackthorn had nothing on his deceptions, he thought.

*

It took less than twenty four hours and Kit was almost impressed at Ellie’s gossip network, given the number of students at the college had to number close to a thousand.

It was a Wednesday afternoon, and like usual, they had the afternoon off for sports and extracurriculars. Kit was pulling off his football jersey in the small changing room outside the playing fields, when he looked up to see Ade standing in front of him. “So Kit… you can be honest,” Ade said seriously.

He gestured to himself and then to the assorted remaining members of the football team. “Which one of us do you think is the fittest?” He grinned.

“Uh…” Kit knew enough British slang at this point to know that Ade wasn’t asking questions about their level of fitness. He weighed his options, and decided to brazen it out. He channeled his best arrogant Jace Herondale, adopting a lazy smile. “I mean- how can I choose. You’re all just soo pretty…”

Ade pouted. “See, I could’ve sworn it was me, especially after you asked to borrow a pair of my pants after practice…”

“That was an honest mistake!” Kit protested, dropping the act. “Trousers just sounds dirtier anyway.”

Ade and Ben let out huge laughs, while Eamonn just smiled. “True, true- the British are good at making even innocent items sounds dirty.”

“You’re telling me,” Kit grumbled, remembering the spotted dick incident at the Bull and Hart with Jem and Tessa.

“You’ve attracted the interest of one Ellie Harris,” Ben informed him. “You should be lucky that you had a good rumour.”

“Yeah- it’s not fair,” Ade said, poking Kit in the side as Kit stood up. “You get to be all mysterious golden boy from Los Angeles. AND now you’re playing for both sides- you shouldn’t get all those aces.”

Kit flushed. “Nah- it’s not like that.”

“Sure it isn’t mate,” Ade said, good-naturedly. “C’mon, let’s go get some food before your bus comes.”

They left the locker room, out into the crisp October air. Kit held back, waiting to let others exit. As Eamonn passed him, the other boy lingered for a moment, and it felt like he deliberately brushed past him. Kit shivered briefly, meeting Eamonn’s big hazel eyes. Slowly, deliberately, Eamonn reached across and gave Kit’s hand a small squeeze.

Kit felt his breath catch.

“Oi, Eamonn, Kit, stop flirting!” Ade’s voice came drifting past them.

Eamonn smiled at him, and jogged on without another comment and Kit let out the breath he had been holding. He pushed down the feeling that he had last felt when it was grey, rather than hazel eyes looking at him.

*

Kit wandered into the airy front hall of Cirenworth, and he could hear Mina wailing distantly further in the house. “Tessa? Jem?”

There was no response, and Kit suddenly felt a shiver run down his spine. He dropped his bag and started running towards the sound of Mina’s cries.

He skidded to a stop in front of the laundry room, as he saw puddles of water, and a prone Tessa, who was frantically mopping up water from an open washing machine. Mina was in her baby bouncer, her tiny face scrunched up and upset as she watched her mother distractedly rock her and mop at the same time, Tessa’s face pinched and tired.

“Do you need help?” Kit asked as he moved into Tessa’s line of sight.

Tessa jumped, and then she relaxed as she saw Kit. “Oh- Kit,” she said. “I didn’t hear you come in. How was school?”

“It was fine- funny story actually…” Kit looked around, and grabbed some of the extra towels he could see, and laid them down beside Tessa. He then bent down and unbuckled Mina, and she buried her face into his shoulder as he scooped her up. “Are you okay? What happened?” He bobbed Mina up and down in what he hoped was a comforting rhythm.

“The water pipe connected to the washer broke,” Tessa said, sighing. She threw a sopping wet towel to her right, and grabbed another one with grim determination. “Jem’s gone into town to see if he can find a plumber at short notice.” She sighed. “And then Mina woke up from her nap after only twenty minutes and then it started flooding again… this house, it’s beautiful and I know what it means to Jem but it needs so much work and-”

“Hey- I know,” Kit said. He didn’t entirely but he could see how tense and tired Tessa was. He knew that Mina was going through another of her ‘sleep regressions’ and despite being an immortal warlock, and a former Shadowhunter and Silent Brother, he knew Jem and Tessa were struggling with the lack of sleep. He had almost beaten Jem in a broadsword fight the day before (almost) so he knew Jem was also definitely struggling.

“Should I put the kettle on?” he offered awkwardly. It had been one of Tessa’s power moves the previous winter, whenever he had stumbled downstairs after short days of brooding alone in his bedroom, and she had put the kettle on, and pulled out a plate of amazing British biscuits, and they had sat in the warm, cosy kitchen, Tessa with her tea and Kit with his biscuits, either content to be together alone with their thoughts, or talking about things of limited consequence.

Tessa smiled. “That would be lovely.”

A thought occurred to him, as he left the room, and he poked his head back in… “Tessa, do your warlock powers not work on plumbing? At least to stop the leak.”

A groan came from the floor. “That is a valid point. Thank you, Kit.”

Ten minutes later, with the leak temporarily plugged, Tessa sipped her tea, and listened as Kit told her about the last couple of days- leaving a few key pieces out, namely about Eamonn. He thought Jem and Tessa probably would be cool with it but he didn’t want to mention it yet. He also didn’t mention the fact that he suspected Ellie was a Sighted mundane- he didn’t know for sure, and he didn’t want to put her on the radar of some keen Shadowhunter recruiter.

“You told her… you had escaped from a cult?” Tessa said slowly, her eyes widening.

Kit nodded. “Yeah, pretty good, huh?”

Tessa’s face contorted, and she buried her head in her hands, her shoulders shaking silently and Kit was concerned until he realised she was laughing.

“Oh, dear,” she said, looking up and wiping a tear out of her eye. “Darling- you. I’m not sure you understand how teenage girls work.”

“Wait, what?” Kit was suddenly panicking. Had he accidentally put them all in danger?

“You’re going to be like catnip to her,” Tessa said. “The Edward Cullen to her Bella Swan. And I’m sorry for that- but I think you’re going to have to figure out a way to fix it yourself.” She patted his shoulder. “Also, this really clears up the conversation I had at baby group today when Gemma asked me if we felt safe since we had come to Devon, given your situation.”

Kit harrumphed. “I thought it was a good plan.” He leaned over to pick up Mina. “Mina- you’ll back me, right?”

“Dada DADA, DA BA,” Mina said, wrapping her chubby hands around Kit’s neck and cooing delightedly. Kit gave her a quick kiss on her forehead.

“Exactly,” Kit said, sweeping out of the room, his dignity still mostly intact, ignoring the additional giggle that had escaped from Tessa. He paused to swipe the rest of the half-opened jaffa cakes packet. “You should rest, Tessa. Min-Min and I are going to go into the back garden- I’ll chill with her until Jem gets home.”

*

Tessa was both right and not right about Ellie.

She had at least kept her promise to save him a seat.

Kit sat down beside her in their English Literature class, glaring. “So… what happened to not telling anyone about the cult thing?”

To give her a tiny bit of credit, Ellie did look contrite. “I’m really sorry about that, Kit,” she said. “I really didn’t mean for it to get out. I don’t think anyone believes it though,” she said, pointing to his hand. “Your make-up work is usually very good, and so no one else seems to have noticed it.” She sighed dramatically. “It is sometimes a curse, being so observant.”

Internally, Kit thanked Tessa’s stronger warlock glamour that he had asked her to put on, but externally, he rolled his eyes, as he leaned back in his chair. “You also told people about me being bi,” he pointed out.

“Well, let’s be honest, that was going to come out eventually and it’s just going to add to your mysterious charm,” Ellie said. “But the other- let me make it up to you,” she leaned forward in her chair, pushing her hands towards the edge of her desk and peering up at him with her big blue eyes.

Kit gave her a sideways glance. “How?”

“My parents are co-owners of the surfing school in Paignton,” Ellie said. “How about you and I go after class next Friday? I can get us boards and you can borrow a suit.”

“At this time of year?”

“Best time for it!” Ellie’s eyes were pleading. “All the tourists are gone and the swells are a perfect height.”

Kit was unsure how much extra time he wanted to be spending with this girl right now, but he had to admit he was intrigued- he had never had an opportunity to surf in LA, and he felt that should’ve been a rite of passage, given he was LA born-and-bred. Maybe he could make up for it now by learning to surf in Devon. “All right,” he said cautiously.

*

Kit yelped, as another cold wave washed over his board and into his chest.

Ellie looked back at him. “Oh, c’mon it’s not that bad- you have a wetsuit on.”

Kit shook the spray out of his eyes, and awkwardly paddled further ahead, pulling up as close as he could to her. He watched as Ellie pulled herself up to a seated position, and they bobbed along in silence for a moment. All around them, the sea was an immense grey mirror, merging with the autumn sky above them, only broken up by white caps in the distance.. Ellie stretched and then she pointed ahead of where they were waiting. “Should be some good waves coming in a few minutes.”

“I don’t suppose this is a good time to mention that I’ve never surfed before,” Kit said casually, as he could feel the current swirling around where his legs were in the water, pulling them further out to sea. The small seed of anxiety began to grow, and he was regretting the choice to put on a wetsuit and go out into the sea in October, particularly as he had never been that strong a swimmer. He closed his eyes - or at least he could’ve refreshed his three-day-old agility rune before heading out.

Ellie whipped her head around. “What? But you’re from Los Angeles...” she said, and her eyes reflected the horror that had sunk into Kit’s stomach.

“Doesn’t mean that I can surf- don’t be so stereotypical,” Kit shot back.

Ellie sputtered and then she looked back. The waves were almost on them. “I thought your paddling was weak... just- try your best to feel the wave,” she said, and then it was upon them, the slight ripple that had seemed so innocent now seeming like a huge tsunami as the previously calm water pulled back into a rippling wave.

Kit paddled frantically, watching Ellie out of the corner of his eye. He tried to focus ahead on the shore, and he watched as Ellie gracefully pushed her way up to a standing position, her surfboard dipping briefly. He tried to imitate her, and tried to balance on the suddenly slippery, treacherous piece of wood underneath him. He managed to get his feet underneath him, and wobbling, he was suddenly standing.

Woah, he was doing it, Kit was ecstatic, and he turned his head to see if Ellie was watching. That was a mistake, and he was suddenly thrown backwards and the immense pressure and power from the wave was pushing him down to the depths of hell.

Kit struggled to orient himself and his world narrowed down to blackness, salt and burning and overwhelming panic.

He felt a hand on the back of his wetsuit, pulling him up, and then grabbing his arm and he surfaced, finding that he and Ellie were in the shoals of the beach, the wave that almost killed him already receding, the white foam swirling around him.

Coughing, sputtering, Kit let Ellie lead him to the shore. She looked a wild mess, her hair a dark purple smeared against her cheeks.

“You- absolute tosser!” she shouted at him, once she had given him the once-over for injuries.

“You never asked if I had surfed before,” Kit offered but he knew the excuse was weak.

“Oh my God!” Ellie literally threw her hands in the air. “Why?”

Kit chuckled briefly at her dramatics, the sheer relief of being alive crashing over him, and she looked over to him, and a smile began to curl on her face.

“Well- you did manage to stand briefly, so you’re not hopeless,” she said, assessing him. “I guess we could start with the basics?”

“Maybe another time,” Kit said quickly. “I think I’ve had enough for today. But yeah… that could be cool.”

He shared another small smile with her. “Let’s go get some drinks on the pier,” Ellie suggested.

*

After saving his life, and this time not telling anyone at college about his incredible fail, it was impossible not to become friends with Ellie. And having a friend in his classes was convenient, especially for the coursework projects they had to do.

Tessa gave him a knowing smile, as he led Ellie into the kitchen one day. But she didn’t say anything, just nodded with her normal warm manner when Kit introduced Ellie, and asked if they wanted any tea before they headed into a small cozy room in the back of the house, previously known as the drawing room, but now functioned as the family film room. They quickly settled into a routine of watching their Film Studies movies in that room a couple times a week, as Ellie pointed out that he had a much better set-up to both study in and skive off than her tiny room at her house.

Kit quickly realised though, that he had to keep Ellie away from certain areas of Cirenworth as her natural curiosity and probable Sight made her innately curious and liable to ask awkward questions. But he had to admit, it kept him on his toes.

“Damn Kit, your relatives were proper lush,” Ellie said, one rainy day in November, staring at a photo of Will Herondale. “I would absolutely let him try it on with me,” she said, as she looked around the rest of the dim hallway.

Kit stood terrified, as he could see the daguerrotype of a younger Jem and a studio portrait of Tessa and Lucie Herondale just behind her. He stepped in front of her, and tried to catch her attention. “Hey, we should go back to the main room,” he said.

“Yeah, just a second- don’t you think it’s just wild, living in a place like this with such a history?” she asked him.

“Yeah, of course,” Kit said, trying to formulate a plan to shepherd her out.

Ellie turned and Kit lunged towards her, and he caught her in his arms. She turned her head up to him, surprised, and then her eyes crinkled and she nodded, going on her tiptoes and with an instinct Kit didn’t think he had possessed, he leaned forward to kiss her. She smelled sweet, like candy, her lips soft and her arms circling around to rest at the base of his back.

“Mmm,” she said, as they broke apart. “That was nice.”

Kit drew her back to a safe room. “Nice?” he said. He frowned- oh god, Livvy and now Ellie. Was he really that bad at kissing girls?

She looked at him. “Yeah…ooh, no Kit, I mean…” He could see in her face that she wasn’t interested in him that way. And he wasn’t even sure he was either… it had just kind of happened. Wow, he really was broken in the romance department.

“It’s fine-” Kit said hurriedly. “And I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have- without asking.”

Ellie put her hand on his forearm. “No, I should have said- I’m kind of seeing Jack Armitage, from Drama.”

“Yeah, sure-” Kit said. He looked past her, asking in a neutral voice. “Just- can you let me know- was it really that bad?”

Ellie looked at him, her eyes moving up and down his body from head to toe, and Kit was suddenly unsure he wanted to know.

“Nah- it was pretty good, actually,” she said cheerfully. “And with the way you look-” she touched his hair fleetingly, and slid her other hand from his forearm to his waist, in a half hug. “You’ll be fine-plenty of girls or boys would've killed for a chance at that kiss,” she informed him, making a familiar gesture. “Cross my heart.”

Kit groaned but he let her drag him back to their Charlie Chaplin marathon. “Why do I feel like you’re humouring me?”

“Oh honey,” she said, throwing herself back onto the sofa. “You’d know if I were humouring you. Trust me.”

And Kit, strangely, found that he did, which was a miracle, considering how they had first met. But maybe that’s what happens with friendships, Kit thought. They could surprise you.

*

Kit was so caught up with his A-level study and his ongoing training with Jem, that he had almost forgotten the promise about guest tutors. But one afternoon in mid-December, he and Ellie walked into the Cirenworth kitchen to find Emma Carstairs sitting at the big butcher’s block table.

“Kit!” Emma flew up and gathered him into a big hug. Hugging her back, Kit faced a sudden wave of homesickness. With her bleached blonde hair, vintage clothes, faint smell of jacaranda and jasmine, and tanned skin, even slightly faded from her travel year abroad, Emma embodied every inch of an LA girl.

Ellie narrowed her eyes, and Kit realised that he would have to get her out of the house. He couldn’t risk Ellie, as a possible Sighted mundane, learning more about the Shadowhunter world.

He made excuses about family visiting and started directing Ellie towards the door. “Just say the word and I’ll rescue you,” Ellie promised in a low voice as he walked her to the doorway. “I saw her tattoo- she’s part of it, the cult!” she said, shooting him a worried look.

Kit smothered a smile. “She’s- look Emma’s a good one,” he said to her. “I’ll be fine- you don’t have to worry about her. Or me.”

“Oookay,” Ellie said. “But you better be at college tomorrow and not kidnapped halfway around the world.”

“Don’t worry, I will be. Bye, Ellie,” Kit said, practically shoving her out of the door. He had barely closed the door when his phone pinged. If we need it- the code word is ‘pizza’. txt me and ill come rescue or call the popo

Kit wished he could headdesk against something but figured he might as well save the bodily harm for the upcoming training session. Jem had mentioned that the first of the guest tutors would be arriving soon… but he hadn’t thought it would be so soon, or that it would be Emma. Unless she was just here for a visit with Jem?

“Yeah, Julian’s just finishing up some stuff at Blackthorn Hall, and then we’ll be heading back home for Christmas… but I’m so glad I get to see you guys before we head back-” Emma was updating Tessa and Jem, who were listening avidly.

“Kit!” she said, as he arrived back in. Her eyes sparkled. “Are you ready to do some training?”

“No?” Kit offered hopefully. Damn, wishful thinking on his part, although he acknowledged deep down he was both excited for, and dreading the training.

Emma’s grin inched wider. “Too bad.”

“May the odds be ever in your favour,” Tessa saluted Kit from the kitchen chair where she was feeding Mina mushed bananas and weetabix. Mina waved her spoon around imperiously, like the tiny Empress she was.

Jem brightened. “Oh- I know that one!” They had watched the Hunger Games the previous weekend as a family, Jem and Tessa sharing a big bowl of popcorn and Kit eating so many crispy M&Ms that he had felt sick from the sugar high for the rest of the evening.

“Honestly, Emma… I kind of feel like Katniss could be your spirit animal,” Kit commented, stifling a laugh at Emma’s puzzled face. “I’ll explain it later.”

*

“Wow,” Emma’s eyes were covetous, looking at the converted old ballroom that was Cirenworth’s training room. The dim sunlight was streaming through the skylight windows, highlighting the ancient weapons hanging on the walls. The floor beneath were fresh tatami mats on half of the room, and half floorboards from the original era. At the back of the room was a raised platform that Jem told Kit had been there since the late 1890s.

“It’s pretty sweet, right?” Kit said, feeling proud. The LA Institute’s training room was well-designed- he remembered marvelling at its smooth, modernist beauty but Cirenworth had character. He walked over to the piece de resistance that he had convinced Jem to install the last time the builders had visited Cirenworth. He pulled out his phone and slid it into a small dock on the side of a wall.

Trumpets started blaring as Kanye West’s ‘All of the Lights’ played in surround sound.

Emma had skipped back, on guard at the unexpected surprise but she relaxed as the music swelled, and a grin started spreading across her face, as Kit unhooked two training rapiers from the wall and handed one to her.

“C’mon,” he said. “You can’t tell me you’ve never had a background soundtrack going on in your head while you’re engaging in some epic showdown with Julian or Cristina?”

Emma laughed and shook her head but her eyes were shining. “This is insane, Kit.”

“And yet?” Kit shrugged. “Do you not want to fight?”

“Oh no, I definitely do,” she shot back. Emma hefted the rapier, giving it a few experimental swings and adjusted her grip. “You ready?”

“As I’ll ever be,” Kit said, preparing to get his ass handed to him.

There was just one issue with having a sound speaker installed, Kit thought later on, as he closed his eyes. Oh god, he was going to die to the background music of Gangnam Style.

“Just jump down,” Emma called from the floor below.

“I can’t just jump,” Kit hissed, from where he was hanging on for dear life on one of the wider ceiling beams of the training room.

“Sure you can,” Emma said, crossing her arms, and Kit flashed back to one of his first weeks at the LA Institute when Jace and Clary had visited, and Jace had told him the same thing. Emma had arrived at the end of that session, and he wondered if she remembered that time.

Well, at least he had made progress since then, Kit thought. This time he was the one twenty feet in the air. Cold comfort though, considering that he had no idea how he was going to get down.

Emma tilted her head, considering. Then she made up her decision, and she quickly made her way up, her black, gear-clad body making quick work of the distance.

“Hey,” she said, her brown eyes softer than usual, as she perched without a care on the beam beside him. “We can take our time and I can talk you through it, give you some techniques.”

“You mean techniques on how to die or fall, breaking my neck?” Kit said sarcastically.

“Demons are expert climbers,” Emma said, matter of factly. “A Shadowhunter can’t be scared of heights or afraid to chase a demon off the ground.”

Kit took a deep breath. “Yeah, I know that- just, give me a minute.” He looked down and shuddered. In the background, he could hear the song switch over to Lorde’s Royals.

“It’s okay to be scared,” Emma told him.

“Hah, like you ever were,” Kit said. “Or at least- while training, I bet you weren’t.”

“No, I was, I broke my collarbone really badly when I was thirteen,” Emma said. “I couldn’t face climbing higher than my height for almost six months afterwards.”

Kit looked up at her. “So what did you do?”

“Panic, cry in my room, and then eventually I just got Julian to be there while I battled through it.”

“I don’t have a parabatai to hold my hand,” Kit said.

“No, but you have me,” Emma said, and she held his gaze. “And I believe in you, and I don’t believe in people that I think won’t succeed. Now, listen-” she told him about making sure his knees were soft, and picking a spot on the floor but not leaning forward as he fell.

Then she dropped effortlessly, her boots making a small thud on the floor.

Kit swallowed hard. Right. Then, as if by an external movie cue, the opening chords of his current favourite song, Pompeii by Bastille started. Kit allowed himself to get briefly lost in the lyrics and as the music echoed around the wide hall.

We were caught up and lost in all of our vices
In your pose, as the dust settled around us
And the walls kept tumbling down
In the city that we love
Grey clouds roll over the hills
Bringing darkness from above
But if you close your eyes
Does it almost feel like nothing changed at all?
And if you close your eyes
Does it almost feel like you've been here before?

Kit jumped. While the ground rushed up quicker than he thought possible, and his knees jarred painfully, he landed upright, and he looked up to see Emma nod approvingly.

“Good- now let’s do that ten more times,” she said.

“I regret signing up for this Shadowhunter life,” Kit said, knowing it was absolutely a lie. Mostly.

*

Chapter Text

December 2013-April 2014

It took almost until almost the end of Emma’s visit for her and Kit to have the conversation he had been dreading.

They were finishing up a sparring match on the raised platform in the training room. Kit could feel the recently applied Deflect and Stamina Marks on his shoulders burning as he jumped back as Emma drove forward, managing to get through his weakening defensive stance.

“Boop,” she said, tapping his nose.

Kit batted her away, and dropped his two training sticks. “Yield, I yield,” he said, pushing back the sweaty hair that was sticking to his forehead.

Despite the cold December day, they were both wearing tanktops, and Kit saw with some satisfaction that Emma also had beads of sweat gathering on her forehead, although she wasn’t breathing as hard as he was. She looked more like she had a healthy glow, like she had just finished a light yoga class, rather than two punishing hours of calisthenics, climbing practice and several sparring bouts. Plus he had taken her on his running route earlier in the morning. Disgusting, he thought. But he felt proud that he had kept up to her pace until now.

He flopped onto the ground of the platform, reaching down to grab his water bottle.

When he rolled back up, he could see Emma had sat cross-legged a few feet in front of him, a serious look in her eyes, as she leaned on one of the training sticks as it supported her steepled hands underneath her chin. “So… Kit,” she said.

“What?” Kit asked. “Do I have food caught in my teeth from breakfast- you’re supposed to tell someone about that, pretty sure that’s in the warrior code-” he was suddenly nervous.

“Why didn’t you say goodbye to us before you left?” Emma asked softly. “You just… left.”

And there it was. Kit felt like the air was closing in around him, a fraction of what he had felt that day on the fields outside Idris, when he had made the Riders of Mannan’s horses disappear -- to save his and Emma’s lives, when he had first been told about the First Heir. He stared at her.

“I- uh,” his voice caught.

Emma waited but when it was clear he wasn’t going to say anything further, she dropped her gaze. “I think some of it has something to do with the battle,” she said. “And what happened with the Riders-” she said. “That’s my suspicion. Don’t forget, I was there, and despite what happened… afterwards, I still remember the start.”

Kit wished his poker face was better as he knew he let a small grimace cross his face.

“And I suspect you’re not able to tell me more,” she said, studying him.

“I can’t - but maybe someday, Emma,” Kit said, relieved that she was focused on that aspect.

She nodded. “I get that. Jem told me something similar. But Julian also thought it might have to do with the prior events too…” Terror seized Kit’s heart. Julian and Emma had been discussing him?

“With your dad dying in front of you. And Livvy dying so soon after,” Emma continued.

Kit wished his eyes would stop watering, and that his heart would stop pounding. “I- yeah, I mean, I was fine eventually,” he said roughly.

“You don’t have to be,” Emma said, reaching out to grab his hand briefly. Kit wished she would stop- maybe some of that was true but he had also been a complete failure of a human, and Ty was still unreachable to him and…

He had missed the next part of her speech. “And… speaking as someone part of the dead parents club, I totally get throwing yourself into something else to try and just live.”

“How did it work for you?” he interrupted.

Emma smiled a crooked smile. “Well- I am supposedly one of the best Shadowhunters of the younger generation. But I also lived only for revenge for five years and then fell in forbidden love with my parabatai and became a giant burning angel… So while I guess it eventually turned out, I think you’re probably currently in the lead on the better coping mechanisms by fleeing the country and trying out mundane high school,” she said. “And hooking up with mundane girls- I see you have a taste in violent girls if that Ellie girl is anything to go by. She looked like she wanted to murder me.”

“College,” Kit corrected absently. “And she’s not my girlfriend.”

Emma waved a hand. “My point stands. But you know- when you’re ready, you should come visit us again- I know we’d all love to see you, especially Ty and D-”

“I doubt Ty would actually care,” Kit said harshly, suddenly tired of the conversation. He stood up. “Thanks, Emma. I’ll think about it. I’m going to go have a shower before lunch. I’ll see you there.”

He hopped off the platform and crossed the room, hoping that Emma wouldn’t follow him and try to press her point.

She didn’t. And she didn’t bring the topic up again during the remainder of her visit. Kit held his breath the whole day that Julian visited but luckily he had been delayed even further than anticipated wrapping up business in London, so was only able to visit briefly on the last afternoon, to join in on a Sunday roast lunch before he and Emma would head back to Los Angeles.

Kit skulked around in the kitchen most of the afternoon, not wanting to get ambushed by another conversation with Emma or start one with Julian. He offered his assistance to Tessa, who seemed both amused and suspicious of Kit’s sudden sous-chef interest.

He suddenly had a thought and texted Ellie in between peeling carrots and parsnips. U in for a sunday roast at mine? id say i fancied pizza but id rather u r here to help me eat it.

Ellie was over like a shot. “I got your back,” she told him grandly, as she swept in from the drizzly day.

While the resulting mealtime was stilted, both Julian and Emma just seemed mildly amused at the mundane conversation, while Tessa and Jem were confused at why Ellie was suddenly there but realised they couldn’t disinvite her without being impolite.

“You have many other hot ‘family members’ that are planning on dropping by? Ellie asked, after they had finished lunch, and she was lurking by the front door, getting ready to leave. “I didn’t notice anything super culty, I mean- they seem a bit out of touch with pop culture and politics but nice enough. Can’t say I minded the eye candy though-- what do they put in the water over there?” she lifted an eyebrow.

“Oh- you mean Julian,” Kit said. “Yeah- I ah, wouldn’t. Emma’s pretty handy with a sw- knife, I mean words,” he said. “And no, I don’t think there will be others anytime soon.”

Ellie gave him an odd look as she waved good-bye.

Kit closed the door, and turned around, and started. Julian was there, lounging like a dark panther in one of the alcoves, his arms crossed casually.

“Hey, Julian,” Kit said, nervously.

Julian smiled. “Hey- I just wanted to say goodbye. Sorry we couldn’t catch up further but we promised Dru we’d be back in time before she returned from the Academy.”

His blue-green eyes were as piercing and perceptive as ever, as they looked at Kit. But Kit couldn’t detect any anger in Julian’s face and he relaxed fractionally.

“Yeah, too bad we didn’t have more time,” Kit mumbled.

Julian’s gaze passed over him and Kit tried to avoid squirming. He worried Julian could still read the situation with Ty, around raising Livvy, on his face. “I know Emma’s already extended the invite to you to visit- and I just wanted to repeat it. Despite how everything ended, you should know you’re always welcome at the L.A. Institute, if you ever want it.”

Kit’s heart squeezed, and he couldn’t resist asking. “Thanks. How is… everyone?”

A shadow passed briefly across Julian’s face before he controlled it. “We’re getting by,” he said simply. “But it’s not been easy. Some days are hard. I imagine you’ve experienced something similar.”

“Yeah.”

They both fell silent at that, acknowledging the chasm of grief that was always there, and the struggle not to tip over the precipice.

Then Jem came to tell them the tea was ready, and Kit was suddenly glad that soon it would just be back to him, Tessa and Mina in Cirenworth.

Except it wasn’t. A week later, on Boxing Day, there was a large bang in one of the upstairs rooms, and two minutes later, Magnus, Alec, their two kids, and Jace and Clary piled downstairs, and Kit suddenly remembered the previous year, when they had also dropped in to exchange presents and ‘escape the hell that is New York ahead of New Year’s Eve’, according to Magnus.

Last year he had enjoyed the visit, as it was a break from the monotony of the grey December days. While he tried to enjoy this year’s Christmas activities and visitors, the tired feeling that had been growing over the past week was dragging at him. Probably he had been doing too much training, he thought. Emma had run him a bit ragged, plus he had had end of term coursework to finish in the evenings up until the break for Christmas.

While Alec, Magnus and the kids ate shortbread cookies in the grand visiting parlour, he showed Clary and Jace the training room, and caught them up on the past few months.

“Mundane high school- how’s it going?” Jace asked, with an easygoing grin. “I don’t know if you know this but I bet Jem you’d-” he stopped as Clary elbowed him in the ribs.

“I think it’s great,” Clary said firmly. “I wish I had finished my GED.”

“Yeah, it’s good,” Kit said, not wanting to get into it. “Hey- let me show you some of the weapons that Jem and I found in the attic. We’re sorting them to see if they can be restored.” He directed Jace over to a cache of ancient weapons that he knew would at least spark a good half hour’s worth of conversation. Jace’s eyes lit up, and Kit mentally revised the time upwards to at least an hour.

The rest of the visit from the New York Shadowhunters was uneventful and dare he say it… fun. After a quiet but peaceful Christmas Day with Jem, Tessa, the following days were filled with children shrieking down Cirenworth’s halls - Mina included - and the warmth of company kept days busy with countryside walks, gentle training (too much food to do anything else), and games like charades and pictionary that were filled with laughter and comfortable conversations. It was so saccharine at times that it almost gave Kit a toothache, despite his love of sweet things.

He remembered Christmas’ past in Los Angeles, his dad barely doing anything to mark the occasion, maybe getting a discount wreath to hang on the door, ordering Chinese food on Christmas day, and Kit pretty much forgetting it was the holiday season, save for the homeless people wandering past with Santa hats.

He was fairly sure which Christmas he preferred.

The only major downbeat to the period was when he passed by the conservatory near the end of the visit, when he could hear Magnus and Tessa talking in low tones, and he could hear his name mentioned. “- job keeping Kit safe-”

He paused near the glass door, trying to eavesdrop while keeping out of sight. “The wards haven’t tripped since early summer,” Magnus said. “That’s good, at least?”

“Yes, it is- and the initial alarm was only triggered by a couple small piskies who were easily scared away.” But there was a doubtful tone to Tessa’s confirmation. “I just don’t trust it.” Kit could hear her walking across the stone tiles, as if pacing, and he shrank back. “But I also recognise that we can’t live always looking over our shoulder.”

“No- you have to carry on,” Magnus agreed. “But I agree. It’s strange that there hasn’t been any further whispers from the Seelie and Unseelie courts.”

“We earned a reprieve due to the upheaval in Faerie with Kieran taking the throne- probably many alliances are being made or broken to adapt to this unexpected situation. I don’t expect it to last but it has bought us some time.” Kit had rarely heard Tessa sound so strategic, and he remembered how she had once, long ago, been married to the head of the London Institute and helped him run the London Enclave.

“Are you and Kit exploring his powers?”

There was silence. “Not yet,” said Tessa. “He needs time… to deal with his grief, to find himself. And he’s still training with Jem - and going to his mundane school. I plan to start him soon- but he’s still so young- fragile in many ways.”

“I know, Tessa. That’s the trouble with Shadowhunters though- and you know this as well as I do. We saw it for Will, for James… and for others who didn’t have the happiest of endings,” Magnus’s voice was gentle. “They don’t usually get that chance to be young and carefree before they have to face their battles. All we can do is make sure they are prepared as much as they can be.”

Kit crept away before they spotted him. He knew he would have to face the music about the First Heir stuff but the way that Magnus and Tessa spoke about him- their faith in him to survive whatever was going to come after him… well, it wasn’t exactly inspiring was it? Maybe he should just focus on enjoying the time he had right now, given his non-likely future.

The hollow, deadening feeling that had been creeping in at the edges widened, and Kit pushed it away.

*

The first two weeks of January term passed in a blur of drizzle, darkness and cranky teachers who used to smile at his witty remarks now staring and ordering him to pay attention. Kit stared at his alarm clock each morning, watching it tick over until seven am, and he had to get up in order to not be late for college. He stopped going out for his usual runs. He heard Mina cry out a couple mornings and he knew that he could get her easily, but he stayed in bed until he could hear Mina instantly quiet from Jem’s soothing greetings, ignoring the guilty feeling building in his chest.

Kit knew he was spiralling and he was scared about descending back into the fugue state that had defined most of the previous winter. And his nightmares were intensifying - almost nightly he now had a front row seat to his dad, Ty, Tessa, Jem and Mina getting eaten and torn apart by mantid demons.

The frustrating thing, Kit thought, was that he was perfectly aware of how messed up he was, but he just couldn’t figure out how to snap out of it.

Until Harriet Ketterly’s party, that is.

In all my dreams before my helpless sight,
He plunges at me, guttering, choking, drowning.
If in some smothering dreams, you too could pace
Behind the wagon that we flung him in,
And watch the white eyes writhing in his face,
His hanging face, like a devil’s sick of sin;
If you could hear, at every jolt, the blood
Come gargling from the froth-corrupted lungs,
Obscene as cancer, bitter as the cud
Of vile, incurable sores on innocent tongues,—

Kit intoned with style, and then looked over. “Something something, Dulce et decorum est.”

“That’s deep,” Ellie said, listlessly. “Do you think I could find some mustard gas for Jack?” she asked in a darker tone. Ellie had broken up with Jack two days prior and was still in the depths of the breakup. She handed him another bottle of smirnoff and Kit took a big swig. They were sitting on a deep sofa in Harriet’s fancy front room, with Kit trying out some sarcastic running commentary as various members of the Drama club passed by. He also decided to liven it up with some of the World War One poems he had memorised for their English Literature’s poetry module. It had nothing to do with the fact that he sometimes thought of a certain Blackthorn, who might appreciate the solemnity of the poems and...

“Hey, Kit-” Ade said, snapping his fingers in front of Kit’s face. “Eamonn was looking for you.”

“What?” Kit sat up. “Oh- I was supposed to-” Something, he was supposed to do something. He took Ade’s helping hand, but swayed suddenly as he stood up. Oh yeah, that was it- he had had a running date to meet up with Eamonn. Oops.

“Whoa, you’re definitely pissed,” Ade watched him with friendly interest.

“Here-” Ellie handed him a green bottle, suddenly perkier. “You have a chance but not if you’re completely sloshed. This isn’t a cure but it could help.”

Kit looked at the bottle. “Buckfast? Isn’t this the medicinal wine sold by those monks down the road?”

“Yeah,” Ellie said. “And it has a ton of caffeine in it. It’ll give you the liquid courage you need to go get your boy.”

Ade looked sceptical but he didn’t argue, just pointed the way he had last seen Eamonn.

It didn’t help him get Eamonn - Kit had missed his chance, as he could see Eamonn trying to negotiate with Harriet over a clearly vomitous Ben… but he did appreciate the feelings a few drafts of Buckfast could give. A deadening of feelings and emotions BUT also, an energy boost to get shit done.

So, he helped himself to a few of the leftover bottles. Purely as an evening nightcap, he thought.

*

And though the taste was foul, he found himself pouring some of it into his evening tea each night throughout the rest of January and into early February, allowing him to both finish his homework, help Tessa with tidying up from dinner and the caffeine usually wearing off afterwards, enough for at least a couple hours of dreamless sleep.

But mornings were tough, and looking at the growing bags under his puffy eyes, Kit wondered if it was worth it. And training was relentless - with Jem continuing to ratchet up the challenge by moving on to teaching him about the various specialty weapons that Shadowhunters of the past had used.

“Kit- are you hurt?” Jem quickly set down the chaliker he had been holding, making his way over to Kit.

Kit winced as he looked down at the shallow cut on his collarbone, slicing his shirt open. He had stumbled and forget to block as Jem had come in from the side- a stupid mistake and one he didn’t think he would’ve made, given they had been training now for more than six months.

“Yeah, I’ll be fine,” Kit said, dabbing at the blood, pushing Jem away as he bent to look at the cut.

Jem straightened up and Kit thought he could see a hint of suspicion cross his face, and Kit suddenly wondered if he had been able to smell the Buckfast that Kit had quickly downed before the session - it had only been enough to give him a small buzz. He drew a quick, graceful iratze on Kit’s neck with his stele, and Kit could feel the small burn as the cuts sealed up.

Jem stepped back. “Let’s finish here for the evening. You look tired, you should head to bed early.”

Kit nodded and slunk away.

*

It should’ve been an easy job, lifting a couple bottles. But Kit had gotten soft since coming to England, and he was out of practice shoplifting.

“Oi, you there-” the florid-faced cashier came hurrying after Kit.

Kit continued to casually stroll out the door but there were several elderly shoppers congregating at the entrance of the Sainsburys and he wasn’t about to push past them. He might be a shoplifter but he wasn’t a monster.

He turned around, plastering what he hoped was an innocent smile on his face, preparing to BS his way out. But he was suddenly flustered as Tessa came out of nowhere, and he could feel her gently pulling out the two bottles he had hidden.

“Thank you for getting the wine, darling,” she said, her voice slightly too loud. He started to speak but the small shake of her head and look on her face warned him to be quiet and or to risk all hell breaking loose. She handed a wiggling Mina to him.

He stood there, letting Mina play with his hair, while Tessa spoke to the cashier and returned to pay for the Buckfast and the whisky he had grabbed.

When she returned, Tessa’s lips were in a thin line but she didn’t raise her voice as she told him. “Get in the car, Christopher.”

On the way back to Cirenworth, Kit kept sneaking glances over to Tessa, who appeared to be deep in thought, her brow furrowed, as they drove on the narrow roads back home.

Feelings of shame rolled over him, and he stared out the window. He knew he should apologise but he couldn’t find the energy to get the words out.

As they exited the car, Tessa moved around to get Mina, and when she stood up, she finally spoke. “You’re… grounded,” she told him. “You can go to college and then home- no going to Ellie’s or Ade’s or anyone’s else house.”

“Fine,” Kit said flatly. “I don’t care.”

He stomped across the gravel and into the house.

*

That evening, as Kit returned to the kitchen for his third round of cookies, he could hear Jem and Tessa speaking in low voices nearby. Kit crept closer, and was rewarded by finding out that indeed, they were talking about him.

“I’m just worried.” He heard Tessa say. “I know this is a stage… but- I can’t help but remember what happened with James and-” she sighed heavily.

“There’s no magic bracelet this time,” Jem said. “And although it was a trying time, James got through it, with some scars, admittedly- but Kit isn’t facing the same situation.”

“But with Matthew too…” The sorrow in Tessa’s voice startled Kit, and he strained to remember who Matthew was in the long list of dead Shadowhunters that he had tried to memorise.

“This isn’t history repeating itself,” Jem reassured her. “But let me try- I have an idea that might get through to him.”

*

“We’re going on a drive,” Jem told him, the next day- a Saturday - as Kit shuffled down to breakfast.

“Thanks but I’m good,” Kit said. “I’m busy.” He yawned as he poured himself an extra large bowl of Crunchy Nut cereal. He passed over an extra spoon to Mina and they had their tiny, regular Jedi fight before she grew bored and threw the spoon off her chair and returned to eating a rusk.

He thought the matter closed, until Jem returned with his coat, a seraph blade, and small, antique globe that Kit had never seen before, and placed it beside him on the table.

“We’re training. It’s not optional,” Jem said, and Kit heard the quiet thread of steel in his calm voice.

Kit rolled his eyes but he complied and went to get changed.

They bumped along narrow roads heading into Dartmoor, the grey sky overhead, and the lingering fog throwing the scenery around them into a dim portrait that made everything seem unreal, as if reality was fading at the edges.

Jem stopped the car, in what seemed to be the middle of nowhere. Rolling hills, peppered with large boulders stretched out in every direction. “Hey- if this is about the drinking- you know you didn’t have to bring me out this far to hide my body- pretty sure Cirenworth’s gardens are big enough,” Kit said, trying to make light of the situation.

“What are you-” Jem gave him a strange look, and then unbuckled his seatbelt. “Come, let’s get some of the equipment out of the boot.”

“What are we doing?” Kit finally asked, as they opened up the trunk - or the ‘boot’.

“Ghosthunting,” Jem said, his eyes scanning the small array of gleaming weapons and arcane items in front of them. Kit recognised some from his Shadow Market days.

“Oh, of course-” Kit said, trying but failing to keep the sarcasm out of his voice.

“It’s a skill you’ll need to know,” Jem told him. “Not all fights will be with demons.” He started handing several items for Kit to add to his weapons belt. He started explaining each one, and despite his annoyance, Kit found he was listening intently.

But his passing good mood soon turned sour, as they hiked further and further into the hills and the light drizzle turned into a steadier downpour. Kit was cold, and tired and very much over this whole Shadowhunter thing.

“Is this a punishment?” he asked Jem. “Cause of what happened with Tessa at the supermarket? C’mon- you guys knew when I came to stay with you that I had a klepto streak.”

Jem looked over at him, rain streaking down his calm, passive face. “No, it’s not a punishment.”

“Then what are we doing?” Kit asked, frustration starting to spill over.

“We-” and then suddenly Jem stopped, and Kit could see why. Ahead in the mist, three huge, hulking figures were emerging over the hill.

He could see the Anglo Saxon warriors moving down, and while he knew that they physically were unlikely to be able to hurt him, particularly given the equipment they carried, it was cold comfort. One of the Ghosts turned his gaze on Kit, and on his blackened face with milky white eyes Kit could read a murderous expression, and he gulped.

“Use the Astronas and filiker, Kit,” Jem warned him, as the ghosts approached.

Kit set up a fighting stance, trying desperately to blink the oncoming rain out of his eyes.

“Well… that was...,” Jem said, at a loss for words, in the aftermath. He looked down at Kit, who was lying about twenty feet away, from where one of the ghosts had thrown him. “How did you find your first unfriendly ghost encounter? Dartmoor is full of them, so if you want to try again- I know another one around three miles further on. You did well for your first one but practice is essential so-”

“No. No, this was not fun,” Kit fumed. He picked up his scattered weapons and stood up. “You’re fucking mental, Jem! What was this supposed to be, some kind of weird intervention? You’re not my Dad- you’re never going to be. And I’m not some Will clone either- so just… fuck off, and leave me alone,” he spat out.

Jem stood there, his face in shock.

Kit stalked off, not caring.

He had barely made it five minutes down the road before he realised his mistake, and frantically pulled relics off his weapons belt as three more Saxon warriors closed in on him. Kit closed his eyes and started praying.

But suddenly Jem was there, with deadly grace and almost superhuman speed, quickly dispatching the ghosts.

“Shall we go home?” Jem asked, raising his voice above the rising, howling wind.

“Yeah,” Kit said in a small, defeated voice.

*

“I’m sorry,” Jem said, and he shucked off his wet overcoat, sweater, and then feeling his plain t-shirt, stripped that off as well, his lightly tanned skin pimpling with goosebumps, old, faded Shadowhunter scars scattered white around his upper body.

He and Kit had returned to Cirenworth and were immediately banished by Tessa to the laundry room to change out of their soaked clothes.

“What?” Kit was still in a less then forgiving mood. He also stripped off his wet shirt and grabbed his Avengers t-shirt from the pile of clean clothes.

“I erm-” In the dim light, Kit thought he could detect a faint blush on Jem’s cheeks. “I’m not trying to compare you but.. Will used to get in these same types of moods, and often a ghost hunt in Highgate Cemetery would help him - provide some distraction.”

Kit stared at him. “You’re serious.”

“Yes, I thought it would cheer you up. But I was mistaken and so I am apologising,” Jem said. “You’re clearly going through some serious issues and I wanted to help. But I clearly misunderstood.”

Kit sighed. “Wow- it’s nice to know you don’t always have the perfect solution or that you can also be wrong. Nice to see that you have character flaws.”

Jem frowned.

“It’s just- like, you’re Saint Jem,” Kit said, pulling off his waterlogged boots but he was starting to feel weirdly warm and fuzzy towards Jem. “You’re basically perfect from what I’ve seen and heard- even when you were younger, never losing your temper, never saying the wrong things. Not like me- who’s just… messy. Emotional.”

“Hmm,” Jem said, and the solemn look on his face started to dissolve. “I was a Silent Brother for well over a hundred years, don’t forget. And you become far removed from human emotion when you become one. That experience doesn’t fade easily.”

He looked over at Kit. “But I’ve never been unemotional when I was… more human. Before and after being a Silent Brother. At least, I don’t think so. And I have been upset- angry at situations and reacted to them. Don’t forget, Will Herondale was my parabatai. I spent my teenage years becoming very used to dealing with the outcomes of his... encounters, and we created many together.” He let a wry smile cross his face. “I was almost always the one to de-escalate them though, so I had plenty of practice. But I couldn’t always control my emotions- and I did let them slip out.”

“How- by cracking a frown on that beautiful face? A small moue of disappointment?”

Jem let out a small laugh. “There was one time I punched Will in the face.” He paused, reminiscing. “And then that same night… I made out with Tessa in my bedroom for the first time.”

Kit grinned at Jem’s slip into modern slang. “Damn- that’s pretty good. What did Will do to make you punch him?”

“Tessa and I found him in an opium den.”

Kit’s mouth opened and closed. “What?! You guys came down so hard on me for even just drinking Buckfast a few times a week. Not fair - at least I’m not doing heavy drugs.”

“That Buckfast drink is a poison,” Jem said with a vehemence that startled Kit, but the moment passed quickly and Jem shrugged. “Yes- I suppose I have become less flexible - or I’ve gotten out of the practice of dealing with Herondales.”

He paused. “You are your own person, though, Kit. I don’t see you as a Will replacement. I apologise if I’ve made you feel otherwise.”

“Yeah, I know,” Kit said, still embarrassed over that insult. “I’m sorry that I said that. That being said- I kind of wish I had known him. I feel like he would definitely get me.”

“He would have,” Jem said, the fond smile that always appeared whenever he spoke about Will, playing on his face. He continued. “You two would have been the death of me- but I still would’ve enjoyed every last one of my last moments.”

*

The fight with Jem seemed to be a catalyst and after Kit apologised to Tessa and offered to make it up to her by offering to watch her favourite Pride and Prejudice version (the six hour BBC miniseries), he felt like the heavy air in Cirenworth was finally clearing.

But he still found it hard to get through the dark, dreary English winter days, especially now without the crutch of alcohol. But the solution to that piece of the puzzle remained missing until nearly the beginning of March…

“What’s up with you, man?” Kit asked finally, watching Ade uncharacteristically slam his fist against the wall. They were taking a break from their workout in Ade’s back garden. His dad had set up a home gym in a shed at the bottom of the garden, and Kit and Ade had been spending at least one day a week trying to improve their reps. Kit poked at his stomach- his one ab was coming along nicely…

Ade shrugged but Kit could still tell he was annoyed. “Nothing- just… stressed a bit about mocks. Mr Whittaker is an absolute wanker, mate.”

“Why, did he threaten to take you down from an A* to an A?” Kit asked grinning.

It was a light poke but Ade’s face darkened. “Oh forget it, it’s not like someone like- like you would understand.”

“Someone like me?” Kit was stung. “What the hell does that mean?”

Ade stood up. “Nothing- never mind.” He started fidgeting with the weights, as if to adjust them but Kit wasn’t fooled.

“No, tell me-”

Ade turned around, and his face was calmer but set, like he was ready for the argument. “Well, it’s not like you have to worry about exams, hey?”

“Why not?”

Ade snorted. “Kit - I’ve been to your place. You’re set up. Honestly, do you even care if you pass your A-levels?”

“Your mom is a doctor,” Kit retorted. “It’s not exactly like you’re about to get thrown out on the streets if you fail an exam.”

Ade rolled his eyes. “You clearly do not understand Nigerian mums. But also- it’s not about- look, let me spell it out for you. You see this?” he pointed to his face and his hands. “I’m black, mate. And that comes with some additional considerations that you aren’t going to have ever even think about.” He shook his head. “I mean- I thought you might understand, given your family and your sister… but-”

Kit sat down heavily. “Ah.” The growing anger suddenly went out of him like a deflated balloon. They sat there, on opposite sides of the small room.

“Sorry,” Kit said finally. “You’re right, I don’t understand that. But… if you wanted to share, I want to listen.” He looked up to meet Ade’s steady gaze. His friend also looked like his anger was also dissipating.

“It’s not even... even like it’s overt, racism,” Ade said, almost aggrieved. “It’s just this.. Undercurrent of expectations. You know Altofts is like- 95% white. When I moved here, it’s like people had already this expectation of who I would be- and it wasn’t a good student. But stereotypes- like I’d be only into football, or a London gangsta. And Mr. Whittaker is just one of the worst- he always praises me when I get a good grade, like he expected nothing better of me… and he’s not the only one.”

“And that’s why you want to get back to London so bad,” Kit said, thinking he was starting to understand.

“Yeah, maybe- although London is also the best city in the world, innit,” Ade informed him. “It has its own problems though, being black there. That’s why my parents moved us out-”

“Oh?” Kit was curious. Ade had never really opened up about his life before in London.

“Yeah…” Ade seemed hesitant suddenly. “Or at least, I think it was the reason… my mum never really said but I think it makes sense. One of our neighbour’s sons was stabbed, about a block from our home. He wasn’t part of a gang or- just a young black bloke in the wrong place at the wrong time.”

“Jesus, that’s horrible,” Kit said.

Ade shrugged. “Yeah- and I think that freaked out my parents, my mum especially. And so when this opportunity came up for her, I think she jumped at the chance to get us out of London, at least for a few years.”

He looked over at Kit. “Anyway- that’s my dark history.”

“Batman has nothing on you,” Kit told him seriously and was pleased to see Ade grin back at him.

“I’m sorry I made fun of you,” he continued. “I- sorry, I’ve been kind of a crappy friend lately. I promise to try and be better in the future, and listen if you want to talk.”

“You have been full on angsty, Herondale,” Ade told him. “I can’t wait until daylight savings time happens and you snap out of your Mr Depressive, Heathcliff persona.”

“What?” Kit asked, not seeing the connection.

“Like- I’m not a doctor yet, but I swear you have a classic case of SAD - Seasonal Affective Disorder,” Ade said, clarifying as he saw Kit’s confusion. “You’re from Los Angeles- land of eternal sun. It must’ve been a huge shock to your system to have to live in the land of perpetual gloom, aka Blighty.” He eyed Kit. “Maybe a touch of PTSD too, from whatever your own origin story is.”

He held his hands up. “Mate- no need to tell me, if you don’t want. I know it’s something to do with a cult, or something, according to Ellie. But you know… maybe if it’s tough, get a light lamp, and spend some of that whack of money you have on some therapy.”

Kit opened his mouth, considering. He closed it again and nodded. “Yeah. okay, maybe…” He moved back to the bench. “I think we’re way over the time now- let’s get back to our reps.”

Ade nodded and came over to spot him. As he was about to start, Kit thought of something else. “Also- regardless, you need some time to relax and chill out about exams. You should come and hang out with Ellie and I- at least once a week, we watch terrible films and throw popcorn and it’s… great. Helps with the stress.”

“Okay,” Ade replied, casually. “We can use your big cinema room, right? That’s class, it is…”

Kit smiled, realising that his half-cocked plan might actually work. Ellie needed some new distraction from Jack and he knew she had been mentioning Ade more recently.

*

Maybe it was the stupid light ball lamp he had bought in Argos, or maybe that finally the days were getting longer, or that he finally started to feel as comfortable in both half of his lives - Shadowhunter and mundane but Kit could feel his spirit lightening as the days moved into April.

And one day, after spotting the tomes about Faerie lying on a side table in Tessa’s special dedicated library and reading room, he knew he also had to finally face another part of his history that until now, he had been ignoring.

He knocked on the door, one evening, while she was bent over a book. She smiled and gestured for him to come in.

“Tessa- can we talk about the First Heir stuff?” Kit asked. “I think it’s time I learned more about it...”

Chapter Text

May-September 2014

The grandfather clock bonged and Kit opened his eyes in irritation.

“I can’t do this,” he said. “It’s the clock’s fault.” And it was a hot July day - there was barely any wind blowing through the wide open windows. Plus, flies kept buzzing by his face, as apparently the English didn’t believe in screens on their windows. Or maybe that was just period properties like Cirenworth Hall.

Tessa raised her eyebrows, but remained seated in a relaxed cross-legged pose.

Kit sat across from her, mirroring her position. They were going through another of Tessa’s Spiral Labyrinth meditation exercises that were meant to open up latent magical powers and as usual, it was boring and pointless. They were no closer to unlocking the on switch for Kit’s fae powers.

Kit sneaked a glance at his watch and sighed. It had been less than ten minutes. “Tessa- this isn’t working. We’ve tried so many of these meditation exercises and they’re dead boring and- why don’t we just fast track it and use something else. What did you do to jumpstart your powers?”

“I could beat you and lock you in the house for six weeks,” Tessa said dryly. “And bring you blood-encrusted items for you to shapeshift into the dead people that owned them and threaten to kill your family if you don’t comply.”

Kit winced. “Oh. Nevermind.”

Tessa shook her head. “It was a long time ago-” she said gently. “And the research done by the Spiral Labyrinth has shown that harsh methods of forcing a warlock to manifest their power risks psychic harm.” She looked at him steadily. “And of course, I could never do that to anyone.”

“But that method- and all the ones we’ve been trying - those were for warlock powers,” Kit pointed out. “What about Fae ones?”

Tessa’s grey eyes were troubled and she knew that he had her there. “We are still looking into it. And in the meantime- it is still worth trying every avenue.”

“But how much time do we have?” Kit said, worrying a thread on his shorts. “If there are factions of Faerie looking for me...”

“We are keeping a close eye on it,” Tessa said. “Try not to worry,” she said, repeating a phrase she had often said since Kit had come to her wanting to learn more about his Faerie heritage.

The door to Tessa’s study creaked open and a bundle of toddler chaos came hurdling in, Jem following closely at her heels.

“Kitty!” Mina said, and pounced on Kit. He grabbed around her waist, lifting her up high above his head, vrooming like an airplane. She shrieked with delight.

“Saved by the Mina,” he said.

Jem had gone to Tessa’s side, and crouched down to give her a kiss on her forehead, and then rested his own forehead on hers for a moment, while she wrapped her arms around him. Kit gave them a moment for the PDA, which admittedly, they didn’t indulge in very often in front of him.

“Driving lesson this afternoon?” Kit asked, after it had passed. He knew that Jem was an unflappable statue in the passenger seat while Tessa unfortunately had a habit of flinching any time he stalled or veered too close to an oncoming car. As soon as he could (which was the day after his birthday), Kit had gotten his provisional driving license and he was ready, so very ready to get the freedom that came from being able to drive a car and not have to rely on the patchy rural public transport or Jem or Tess driving him.

Jem straightened up. “So soon? I thought you were going to the beach with Ellie this afternoon?”
“Yeah- but I’ll get there much faster if I can practice driving with you,” Kit said, giving Jem his best puppy dog eyes. It clearly worked, as Jem agreed, and Kit headed to the kitchen to grab some lunch before they left.

*

The spring had passed in a blur of a crash-course of Faerie court lore and etiquette, the pressure of AS-level exams, and a slightly reduced training schedule to compensate for the first two facts.

Mina had turned one at the end of March and Kit seventeen at the end of April. In May, Jem’s cousin, Ke Yi Tian, from the Shanghai Institute had arrived as Kit’s second guest tutor and Kit had dived into learning all about weapons, both ancient and modern, from China and other East Asian countries. Maybe it was too obvious given his film history love but Kit’s favourite weapon from that time ended up being the shuriken. “Can’t argue with ninja fighting stars,” as he had told Jem. He spent hours practicing throwing them all over the house before being banished to the training room after breaking several vases and putting holes in several old photographs (but only of Lightwoods, he had argued- so it barely counted).

After Altofts broke up for the summer though, he and Jem shifted back to regular training and Jem started taking him out in the evenings and they spent the early night hours climbing (and in Kit’s case, scrambling) up and down the slate roofs of nearby villages and towns of Newton Abbot, Torquay and Paignton. While he was probably never going to love heights and being up high, Kit admitted he felt pretty badass being able to leap across the rooftops like a Bond or Bourne Identity character.

During the day, when he didn’t have proto-Faerie power training or history lessons with Tessa or Shadowhunter tutorials with Jem, Kit spent his days on the wide, sandy Devon beaches, finally learning to surf with Ellie. (Ade was spending the majority of the summer doing work shadowing at his mum’s practice to pad out his upcoming medicine applications in the fall.)

In August, Beatriz Mendoza and Marisol Solcedo arrived at Cirenworth Hall for a short tutoring session slash holiday. A third Shadowhunter joined them, although he was too young for training. Jonathan Cartright-Solcedo was almost the same age as Mina - his dad, Jon Cartright - was the Centurion who had been murdered by Malcolm Fade when he had breached the L.A. Institute’s wards. Jonnie was an all right kid, Kit thought, but given he sometimes stole Mina’s toys and made her cry, he was going to keep an eye on him. But Marisol and Beatriz were cool, they were only a few years older than him, and had gone through the Academy so were able to share some of the newer techniques that Jem didn’t use.

In mid-August, Kit got the results of his AS-level exams- straight Cs across the board in all subjects. He wasn’t Ade- so he’d take those results. The rest of the month passed in a haze of sunny days, runs in light summer rain, ice cream walks on the pier and sandcastle-making with Mina.

And then just like that, summer was over, and Kit was about to enter his second year at Altofts College.

*

“Isn’t it beautiful?” Ade sighed.

Kit squinted. “It’s tall,” he said. “I don’t know if it fits the rest of the aesthetic of the South Bank.” The giant skyscraper known as the Shard loomed over them.

Ade shook his head. “You and your aesthetics, Herondale. Why can’t you just appreciate the marvel of modern architecture.”

“I’m with Kit,” Ellie said, poking her head out from the other side of the bench. “It doesn’t suit the rest of the area.”

Kit looked up again. “It looks like Sauron’s eye, out of Lord of the Rings.”

They were sitting outside London Bridge Station on the warm September day, waiting for Ade’s sister to pick them up. It was the open day at several London universities and Kit had managed to convince Tessa and Jem that he, Ade and Ellie would be fine without parents, given that they were going to stay with Ade’s oldest sister in Denmark Hill, and were going to be given a tour of Kings College by his other sister.

Ellie had planned her own trip to see some drama schools but she still tagged along with Kit and Ade for the incoming journey.

Kit had felt exposed as they left the underground station. He knew they close- dangerously close- to the location of the London Shadow Market.

As they had walked through the warren of tunnels underneath the station, Kit felt drawn to the exit that he knew would lead to the entrance of the Market.

“I’ll catch up with you guys in a bit-” he said. “Need to find a restroom first.” Just a quick peek surely couldn’t hurt....

But it wasn’t to be. As he came out the exit, he could feel eyes on him. Watching him coolly, as she leaned against the brown brick wall of the old railing tunnel, was Hypatia Vex, the co-owner of the Market.

“Kit Herondale,” she said, in a low voice as he approached. “You shouldn’t be here.”

Kit looked around, and moved closer. He thought that she was glamoured and he stood his ground. “I’m not at the market, so I’m not in your turf. You can’t just claim the whole city,” he said.

She blinked at him, her starry eyes as mesmerising as they had been during his first visit to London. “I’m offering a warning, not-so-little Shadowhunter,” she said. “I have heard some growing whispers coming from the Unseelie court, looking for a certain lost Herondale.”

Kit felt cold goosebumps raise on his skin, despite the warm day.

“Don’t come to the market, or it will be on your head- and I would hate to explain the situation to a certain former Silent Brother or Magnus Bane,” Hypatia said. She inclined her head as if to dismiss him, and glided away.

Kit stood there a moment, rooted to the spot. He swore internally, and then headed back to his friends.

*

Kit let the heavy fire door slam behind him and headed down the staircase, exiting by a side door that had been propped open.

It wasn’t that the party hadn’t been good but he didn’t know anyone there other than Ade and Ellie and Ade’s sister, Monife. And he could see Ade and Ellie try not to fall into each other’s orbit but they kept circling back to each other until Ellie had grabbed at Ade’s hand, and pulled him into a corner, and Kit had looked away to give them some privacy.

Once outside, Kit felt like he could take a deep breath, in the cooling night air. He pulled on his hoodie, and started to walk, the bottle of vodka he had lifted from the host’s table heavy in his hand. He picked his way from the university residence across emptying streets and through hulking concrete Brutalist buildings that dominated the south side of the river.

He wasn’t entirely sure where he would go but somehow his feet knew where they were heading, and he found himself back along at the edge of the Thames. Despite the late hour, there were still people walking along the South Bank.

Kit took a moment to sit on a bench, and took a deep slug of the vodka, coughing as it burned its way down his throat. He knew the destination he wished to travel to… his feet itched to head back towards London Bridge and the London Shadow Market.

But even he knew that was a bad idea, without back-up. And he remembered Hypatia’s warning. He kicked at some trash on the ground. It wasn’t fair.

But he knew where else he could go. He could see the spires winking in the distance from the other side of the river. He just had to cross Blackfriars Bridge, and he’d be there. He stood up, watching small river boats zip past, and more leisurely booze cruises glide by with laughter and pounding club music trailing along in their path. As the moon rippled light across the choppy water, Kit made his decision.

*

The London Institute looked the same as it had when he had been spat out in front of its heavy doors two years ago, a dark, dominating Gothic presence, shadows stretching out from its gates inscribed with the latin phrase Pulvis et umbra sumus - we are dust and shadows. Kit opened the gates, crossing the wide courtyard dominated by towering trees, and sat on the steps.

There were no lights on in the Institute and Kit remembered the empty, echoing halls, and how despite it being the largest Institute in Western Europe, when he had been there, its habitants had been two elderly ladies and a ghost. He wondered if the headcount had increased since - somehow he doubted it. Although he thought he had heard Jem mention something about Centurions being posted there- hopefully he wouldn’t run into any of them- he was not a fan after Los Angeles.

Speaking of ghosts, after a few minutes, there was a shimmer beside him on the step and Jessamine materialised. She looked as lovely as she always did, her long Victorian gown swishing as she sat down, and her delicate face sharpening with interest as she took him in. “Christopher Herondale,” she said, “What an unexpected surprise.”

“Don’t mind me-” Kit said. “I’m just here to drink and brood on my future.”

“Oh,” said Jessamine with faint tones of disapproval and disappointment. “You’re drunk.”

“Drinking-” Kit corrected, taking another swig from his bottle, and gave her a charming smile. He had since February’s issues barely touched a drop at home in Devon but when in London- what Tessa and Jem didn’t know…

“Hmmph,” Jessamine said. “Before you carry on with your wallowing, I don’t suppose you might be willing to tell me what has happened with Tessa and Jem… I heard you are living with them, and that they had a baby girl?” she asked hopefully.

Kit looked up. “Oh yeah- Mina! I can tell you about Min-Min.” And he bragged about how she was walking and running now- and talking up a storm. He pulled out his phone to show her photos and the small videos he had taken - including the one of Mina dancing and singing along to ‘Let it Go’ from Frozen. Jessamine brushed long, elegant fingers over the phone, and Kit thought he could see a moment of longing pass over her face.

In return, Jessamine told him some surprising anecdotes and gossip about Shadowhunters who had lived in the Institute over the past century and Kit listened avidly. Jessamine was surprisingly good company for a ghost - and he suspected she was very lonely.

Sometime near dawn, Jessamine disappeared and Kit spent a few peaceful moments listening to the birdsong and the wind rustling through the leaves. He looked down at his Voyance Mark, tracing the dark outline and remembering the night he had first met Jessamine, when he, Ty and Livvy had spent a late night together in one of the drawing rooms; when Ty had given him his first and only permanent rune. It felt like a lifetime ago.

He rested his chin on his knees, hugging them close. Kit idly wondered if it might be possible to continue to do both- be involved in the mundane and Shadowhunter worlds. He imagined being a student at a London university, meeting up with Ade and Ellie after classes but maybe spending his evenings hunting down demons that stalked the city’s streets - returning afterwards to his assigned room at the London Institute. Or maybe that townhouse Jace had mentioned.

He sighed. It would never work, and he knew soon he was going to have to choose - except it had never really been a choice.

*

The sky was a lighter blue, and Kit checked his watch. Six am. A scritching sound echoed in the courtyard and he was suddenly alert. He saw a shadow race across the edge of the furthest part of the courtyard and his heart started pounding. Was there a demon nearby?

Kit zipped open his backpack to his hidden compartment, easing out the silver knife given to him by Jace. He stood, aware that his reflexes were still fuzzy from the alcohol. Oh well, he thought, nothing he could do about that now but roll the dice.

He crept forward across the flagstones, knife in the loose, defensive position Jem had taught him.

But it wasn’t necessary as he soon realised what had made the sound. A small grey shadow was sprawled on the stones and it looked up at him with yellow eyes. “Church?” Kit said, incredulous. The cat hissed at him, and Kit rolled his eyes. “Nice to see you too, buddy.” Church licked a paw, and then gave Kit a superior look before waltzing away, tail held high.

There was a soft, scuffing sound behind him and Kit moved with instinct, grabbing the arm that tentatively touched his shoulder, and propelling its owner back against the cast-iron fence, knife under his throat. Grey eyes stared at him in confusion.

“Kit?” Ty’s voice had deepened, but was still so familiar that Kit nearly lost his grip. “What are you doing here?”

He hadn’t taken off his headphones and Kit could see them tangled in his black hair, which he had grown out into a different hairstyle that brushed his shoulders. It made him look… older. Yeah, that was it.

“I uh,” he stammered. “I’m here on my own…and-”

Ty looked past him suddenly, and out of the corner of his eye, Kit could see a flash of white and a flicker of brown hair. Livvy. Of course; she was still tied to Ty. Then suddenly Kit was on the ground, his arm stinging from the very elegant disarmament Ty had performed. Of course he had, he was a Blackthorn and very good at the whole Shadowhunter business. That much hadn’t changed in nearly two years.

“Sorry. I have to go, the timing is very important on this spell,” Ty said seriously, peering down at him. He was taller too, Kit realised.

Ty frowned. “But wait for me, I’ll be back soon.” He held out a hand, and Kit took it, stumbling a bit as Ty hauled him to his feet. He didn’t wait for Kit to reply but took off at a quick jog, his long legs making easy work of the distance between the steps of the Institute and the gate, and disappearing around the corner.

Kit’s drunken, stuttering brain finally rattled into gear, and he dropped his bag and ran towards the gate.

*

Kit made his way back to the Institute to pick up his backpack and knife, fighting back the nauseous feeling rising in his chest. Moments later, the contents of his stomach found their way onto the wide stone flagstones of the courtyard. Lack of sleep and alcohol were not conducive to conducting flat-out runs to catch stupid gazelle-footed Blackthorns, he thought.

Jessamine re-appeared beside him. “Iratzes help,” she said quietly.

“What?” Kit looked up at her, his hands still on his knees and his throat burning.

Jessamine cleared her throat. “I happen to know that while they can’t completely sober you up, an iratze can take the edge off the alcohol.”

Kit thought he couldn’t feel worse. “Worth a try,” he muttered. He knelt down and dug through his backpack until he found his rarely used second stele. It was an antique and had been a gift from Tessa - he thought it might have been her son James’ stele, more than a lifetime ago.

He pulled his sleeve up and drew a clumsy iratze, high enough up on his arm that he wouldn’t have to deal with any awkward questions from Ade and Ellie on the way back home.

Jessamine was right, and the fuzzy edges around his head and the stomach roiling began to ease almost immediately.

“Thanks,” he said, looking over at Jessamine. “Hadn’t learned that use of the rune from Jem yet.” And he suspected he never would.

“Quite all right-” Jessamine said formally, but she was looking at him in sympathy. “I take it you didn’t catch up with him?”

“No,” Kit replied shortly. No use saying that while Ty had asked him to wait until he came back, Kit wasn’t about to do that. Maybe… but no, he couldn’t.

“He’s one of the Blackthorns, isn’t he? I saw him come in last night to use the library. He must have stayed the night but if he’s not coming back, I imagine he’s probably staying at Blackthorn Hall- I overheard from Evelyn that Julian Blackthorn was refurbishing the place.”

“No, I’m going to be leaving him alone- he doesn’t need me. He made that very clear,” said Kit, stuffing the stele back in his bag.

Jessamine arched one of her eyebrows. “Herondales, always so dramatic - and always so wrong,” she said.

Kit stiffened. “How would you even know about my situation?” He thought back to the night when they had raised Livvy, and the lack of even acknowledgement from Ty, and how he had acted the day of the battle, and he had still been so concentrated on only his feelings, and Livvy. Kit was nothing to him.

“Maybe your Herondales had their reasons too.” He stood up. “Anyway, I have to get back to my friends.”

Jessamine huffed. “My Herondales were also often rude, and didn’t appreciate my insights. I see that trait has been passed down.”

“I have to go,” Kit repeated. He looked down at his watch. “Uh- now.” Their train from Paddington wasn’t until ten but he needed to pick up his other stuff and he could see that there were a couple missed texts from Ellie already.

He slung his bag on his shoulder. “See you around, Jessamine.”

*

On the train back to Devon, Kit slumped tiredly in his seat, as Ade and Ellie tried to pretend to be casual about the fact that they had hooked up. Kit could see it in the way that they both oh so casually avoided touching each other in the small train seats.

“Hey,” Ade had moved across from their table seat to sit next to him. He nudged Kit. “So, what do you think? Me at Barts or maybe even Kings if I get lucky on my exams, Ellie at Royal Holloway or RADA and you at Kings too, or St Marys? Would be lit.”

Kit smiled back at him, despite his tiredness. “Yeah. It would be, except you’re delusional that I’m actually getting in at those places. I barely got a C on AS levels.”

Ade shrugged, unworried. “Don’t sweat it. AS levels don’t always count for that much- or you could always do a resit, plus unlike us poor bastards applying for medicine, you still have a few months until you have to apply anyway.”

“Yeah,” Kit said, feeling torn between not wanting to crush Ade’s hopes and just telling him that wasn’t sure he was going to be applying in the first place. He looked over at Ellie, who had put in headphones and was humming quietly as she flicked through her planner.

He nudged Ade back. “So… what’s going on with you and Ellie? I saw you guys were pretty close at the party.”

Ade grinned at that, crossing his arms. His whole face had lit up and Kit felt a weird tug at his heart. He wasn’t jealous of them… but this whole meeting Ty had had him feeling a bit adrift, a familiar feeling whenever his Shadowhunter world collided too close with his mundane life.

“A gentleman never kisses and tells,” he told Kit, but then lowered his voice. “But let’s say- I definitely rocked her world. OW!”

Ade looked across the table from where Ellie was looking up at them. She had kicked at him under the table, Kit could tell.

“Right on, you wish,” Ellie said. A hurt look passed over Ade’s face, and Kit felt bad but then he could see that Ellie noticed it too. “It was good, a lot of fun,” she said, hastily.

She changed the subject. “Where did you go last night Kit? I know you didn’t stay at the residence hall. Or at Ade’s sister’s place.”

“Just felt like doing some wandering, on my own,” Kit replied, having already thought of his alibi on the way back from the London Institute. “You know how I grew up in Los Angeles? I used to walk to clear my head,” he said, smoothly. He had never - as if you’d wander around L.A., the land of a million cars. “It felt familiar to do so in a big city in London.”

Ade and Ellie stared back at him, and while Kit had originally thought they’d buy it, now he wasn’t so sure. “Plus, as much as I like you guys, I wasn’t about to buy tickets to your makeout session, and it was a small room full of people I didn’t know.”

Ellie rolled her eyes. “As if. Did you not see people looking? You could’ve at least made out with half of those strangers, Zac Efron clone.”

Kit felt vaguely insulted. “Ouch, am I not at least Channing Tatum level?”

“No,” both Ade and Ellie replied at the same time. Kit relaxed, as the conversation descended into light teasing, and Ade moved back to the same side as Ellie, and she snuggled into him openly as they made their way back home.

Kit was happy for them. But he still felt unsettled by his encounter with Ty at the London Institute, plus the conversation with Hypatia and he was still thinking about it when they pulled into Totnes station a few hours later.

“How was London?” Jem asked, when he picked him up from the train station’s parking lot.

“It was good,” Kit stifled a yawn. “I know you had Church following me throughout.”

Jem smiled that quiet smile of his. “I figured you’d rather have him than Tessa or I?”

“Yeah,” Kit said, and slumped down in the seat. “Not sure what you expected the cat to do if a demon or faerie attacked me.”

“Oh, you’d be surprised…” Jem said, laughing as he pulled out of the station. “That cat can hold his own-” He looked over at Kit and his eyes briefly narrowed. “Did something else happen?”

Damn Jem and his perceptiveness. Kit debated telling Jem about his encounters with Ty and Hypatia. But then he decided against it. There would be more explanations and well- no use bringing up ancient history. Plus he didn’t want to worry Jem and he would be back safe in the wards around Cirenworth soon, and it wasn’t even as if Hypatia’s warning was anything concrete. “I went by the London Institute this morning,” he confessed. As he so often knew, part truths were much better than an out and out lie.

Jem nodded. When Kit didn’t volunteer more information, he asked. “And I guess that was the first time you’d been back since you were there with the Blackthorns?”

“Yeah,” Kit said. “It was weird.”

“I understand,” Jem replied. He nodded to himself and seemed to reach a conclusion, sensing that Kit didn’t want to talk further about it. He turned on the radio and they spent the rest of the journey in a companionable silence listening to Graham Norton on Radio Two.

When they arrived back home, Kit briefly greeted Mina and Tessa and then ran upstairs, begging off because of tiredness. He didn’t want to have to run the same gauntlet with Tessa that he did with Jem, particularly as he was sure she’d worry too much about Hypatia’s warning.

He lay on his bed, too tired to sleep. His mind kept replaying the moment when he had met Ty’s eyes. The same, grey eyes, fringed by darkest black eyelashes that had usually avoided meeting anyone’s gaze. But he had this time, in the courtyard, met Kit’s, and Kit was going mad trying to decipher the look he had seen in them.

The same feeling that had bubbled up this morning returned, a feeling he had thought he had buried and locked away and forgotten about. But he hadn’t.

Fuck. He still loved Ty. Was in love with him.

He pulled out his phone, and scrolled down his contact list. Yes, Kit still had his number. Impulsively, he texted:

Sorry I couldn’t wait this morning

He hit send, and almost immediately heard the soft ding of a reply.

The sender is unknown

Kit groaned and burrowed his face in a pillow. Of course, he was so stupid… Ty had blocked him. He should just let the past stay buried.

*

Maybe that was why when Eamonn approached him at Ellie’s party a couple of weeks later, Kit finally cracked. He accepted the cold can of cider that Eamonn passed him and followed him down the darkened hallway. They slipped into a small side room, and as Eamonn closed the door, Kit opened his cider, the tab hissing in the sudden silence. He took a small sip, tapping his foot nervously and looking around the room- there was a small couch behind him and-

“Kit,” Eamon’s voice was soft and close. Kit looked up and saw the other boy was standing in front of him, his cheeks red from the heat of the party and alcohol and his hazel eyes gazing at Kit with anticipation.

Kit’s mouth felt dry, despite the cider. “Hey- look, Eamonn- I,” he stammered. Eamon traced his fingers down Kit’s arms, extracting his cider and set it down on the side table. Eamonn returned and Kit realised he was actually a bit taller than him. Holy shit, was he finally hitting another growth spurt?

Eamonn watched him carefully, as if he were a hurt wild animal. That pricked at Kit’s pride- he wasn’t about to run- and stepped closer so he could see the clear green flecks separate from the dark brown in Eamonn’s eyes.

“Let’s just see how it goes, yeah?” Eamonn said, and he leaned forward to kiss Kit.

Kit’s eyes widened and he was suddenly panicked about where he was supposed to put his arms now, but after a few seconds when Eamonn didn’t immediately pull away or punch him, he relaxed. Eamonn’s kisses were soft and he tasted of cider and sweat. Kit drew his arms around him and surrendered to it, deepening the pressure on his end, closing the distance between them and he could hear Eamonn let out a small moan. Kit could feel his lips curving up in a wicked smile- and a heavy but wonderful feeling flooded through his body, setting his nerves alight. He could do this- kiss another boy.

*

And a lot more besides, Kit thought cockily, later on as he finished pulling down his t-shirt as he slipped out the door.

He looked up and yelped in surprise as he nearly walked into a drunk Ellie, leaning heavily against the wall and giving him a knowing grin.

Behind him, he could hear the door open and close, and he watched as Eamonn edged past him and Ellie, winking at Kit as he disappeared.

“Woo, look at that,” Ellie said happily, waving her violently pink can of gin at Kit, her cats-eye make-up smudged.

Kit shrugged. “Yeah,” he said, trying to remain nonchalant. He had a reputation to maintain.

But this was Ellie. “Pffew, don’t be like that,” she pushed at his shoulder. “I’m happy for you,” she said. “It’s been more than a year of you looking like this-” she pinched his cheeks. “But deciding that you’d rather than be tortured and mysterious and not let anyone in.”

“I am not,” Kit said, slightly stung.

Ellie patted his cheek. “It’s okay to miss him…” she said, suddenly serious.

Kit stared. He had never mentioned Ty to Ellie.

“But it’s okay to decide that you want to move on and be happy too,” Ellie said. She hummed a few bars of what Kit thought was an Adele song, and then she bounced off to find Ade.

*

“You are… what’s the term? Away with the faeries,” Mark Blackthorn informed Kit, as he swept him off his feet for the third time with the long staff. He and Cristina Rosales had arrived three days ago, and Kit thought that maybe, maybe this would start to get easier…. But it wasn’t. And combining Shadowhunter training with his increased A-level coursework at college, Kit was exhausted.

A year in, and Kit was beginning to think that Jem had a not-so-hidden sadistic streak. There had to be more to Shadowhunter training than getting his ass handed to him.

Mark chuckled, and Kit suddenly realised he had spoken that last part out loud.

“It’s definitely more than half getting your ass handed to you- probably higher if you’re training with Emma,” Mark informed him. He walked over to Kit, all shadow-grace and coiled muscle.

He had a more wiry frame than Julian or Jace or other Shadowhunter guys that Kit knew, but there was still immense power behind him, Kit thought, as he allowed Mark to give him a hand up. “Yeah, I experienced that firsthand.”

“Emma has installed sound speakers at the training room in LA, thanks to you,” Mark said, in an amused tone. “I have to admit, I don’t always understand it but she and Cristina seem to enjoy training to someone called Taylor Swift, when we’re visiting at the Institute.”

“Nice,” Kit said approvingly. He wondered if Emma had appreciated his basic bitch soundtrack that he had sent her. The five thumbs up she had sent over seemed to indicate she was a fan.

“Should we continue?” Mark cocked an eyebrow. “We still have another hour before Tessa and Cristina said they’d be back from shopping.” He spun the staff around lazily.

Tessa had taken Mina and Cristina out to the local farm shop, and Jem was out on what Kit privately referred to as his covert ops missions that Kit was dying to know about but hadn’t yet had a chance to try and worm it out of him. He knew it had something to do with Magnus and Alec. He and Mark had been training most of the morning.

His mind flashed back to the scene a few weeks ago at London Bridge and Hypatia’s warning. Given Mark and Cristina’s - whatever it was relationship with Kieran, the now king of the Unseelie - he realised this could be a good opportunity to see if there was any knowledge he could gain. Or even just general faerie history- he knew he should be studying it more but most of the old Shadowhunter tomes were just boring and super racist towards the Fair Folk. And he had only gleaned the most basic facts growing up at the Los Angeles Shadow market.

“How about some archery practice? Jem and I set some targets up in the hills outside of Cirenworth.”

Mark’s eyes lit up. “Excellent plan!”

Kit and Mark traipsed up the hills in a companionable silence. They started sighting their bows, and shortly after arrows started flying through the still, late afternoon air, Mark’s finding the bullseye more often than Kit’s but Kit wasn’t missing as much as he would’ve even a month ago.

After a few minutes, Kit glanced over. “Mark- can I ask you some… delicate questions? I didn’t really want to do it in the house but...”

A crease appeared in Mark’s forehead and he appeared to think about it, lining up a shot and letting the arrow fly true before turning to Kit. “Ah, of course,” he said, clearing his throat. “Julian asked if I could do the same for Drusilla.” He eyed Kit speculatively. “And I can see how having two parents brought up in the Victorian era might mean that some questions have gone unanswered.”

He laid down his bow, and sat cross legged on the grass, patting the spot beside him. Kit sat down, feeling slightly confused.

“So-” Mark began loftily. “Should we begin with the male or female anatomy- I happen to know that flowers can provide a good visual companion,” he cast his eyes around the field. “Let me see what I can find…”

“No!” Kit suddenly put two and two together. “I don’t need sex advice! Or the sex talk in general.” He desperately hoped his face didn’t reflect the mortification he felt.

“Oh,” Mark was nonplussed. “So is it more matters of the heart? Or, as they say in Los Angeles - your love life?”

“No, I wanted to talk about faeries- and,” Kit said, but he noticed a subtle change to Mark’s face when he said the word faerie.

“Ah, of course- who else to turn to but Mark Blackthorn as the faerie expert,” Mark muttered. He brushed off Kit’s protestations. “No- it’s fine. I do have more… lived experience compared to most Shadowhunters, although I’d say that Cristina is probably better for lore.”

Kit felt bad- he knew what it was like to be pigeonholed, despite the fact that he was incredibly curious to know more about Faerie from someone who had lived there and also had Faerie blood. But he knew he wasn’t supposed to mention the First Heir stuff to anyone, not even the Blackthorns, so it was probably for the best, given Mark might have guessed some of the situation, even from the basic questions Kit wanted to ask. “Nevermind,” he said, scuffing his feet into the dirt in front of him. “You’re right- I probably should ask Cristina.”

Mark was silent for a moment, brushing his fingers over the tops of the tall grass.

Kit drew his knees up beside him. “There is… actually, a matter of the heart.”

“You don’t have to make me feel better, Kit,” Mark said finally. “And I apologise- there’s been… a lot of tension between Downworlders and Shadowhunters, with the Cohort and their commando attacks lately so the Alliance has been incredibly busy. Plus rumblings from some rebellious sections of the unseelie court that Kieran has passed on. I think it has made me- a fraction short-tempered.”

“I actually do…” Kit said, half torn about asking for more information about Kieran’s rebellious factions, and actually wanting to ask Mark for relationship advice. He wasn’t about to tell Mark about his ongoing feelings for Ty- that would be weird… but maybe he could ask about the situation with Eamonn, and what Ellie had said about moving on. He knew from his studies that those in Faerie had non-standard views about different kinds of love and maybe he could draw on Mark’s experience with both faerie and human love.

“I’m trying to… I-” Kit faltered. “I loved someone- maybe even love them still. But they don’t love me and I’m trying to move past that. And I am- I’ve done some stuff... with other people- it’s been fun. But it’s not the same feelings. And I think that’s fine and and…” he trailed off.

Mark gave him a steady look. “Are you feeling guilty about being with others?” he asked. “About being physical with them- perhaps giving them some of your heart?”

“Maybe?” Kit felt exposed. This had been a stupid idea. “It sometimes feels a bit like betrayal but also- I can’t be lonely forever. I don’t want to be.”

Mark absorbed the information. “I wonder why you feel like you have to forget and ‘move on’ from your long-lost love,” he said quietly. “In- from what I’ve seen from my experience, there is no need. They can still be held in your heart, all the good parts of your time together alongside the ending. But it doesn’t - shouldn’t - prevent you from opening up your heart to others,” he said. “It might be hard at first but just because you once loved someone fiercely, it doesn’t mean you have diminished capacity for new loves. Or that you shouldn’t seek pleasure or solace physically with others. Our hearts are not that finite.”

His mismatched blue and gold eyes met Kit’s and Kit thought he saw a flash of sympathy.

“But,” Mark said lightly. “I have been informed by others that I have unorthodox views so-”

“No,” Kit interrupted him. “That was helpful, thank you.” From Mark’s advice he heard echoes of what Jem had told him back when he first asked about training together and they had spoken about his father. About keeping one’s heart open and not letting it become small and closed in, instead reflecting back all the love he had to the world.

“You’re welcome,” Mark said gravely. He sprang to his feet. “Should we return to archery?”

“Yeah,” Kit nodded. They returned practicing, Mark offering small pointers on Kit’s stance, when Kit tentatively asked about the rest of the Blackthorns. Mark filled him in quickly on his siblings and Kit pretended not to be super interested in the update on Ty.

“Ty’s still wearing his heron necklace,” Mark said at the end, and Kit glanced quickly over but Mark was still casually lining up a shot. He suspected if it were Julian, he might have faced more questions but Mark kept his own council.

“That’s good,” Kit said cautiously. He hadn’t noticed that in London. And it didn’t mean much - it meant Ty and Livvy were still protected by Magnus. That’s all. Kit flashed back to the night at the Institute. What spell had Ty been working on? Was it one to free Livvy? Or something else. Not his business anymore, an internal voice reminded him.

Mark flashed a quick smile at Kit but didn’t say anything further, and Kit returned to his own practice, hoping the flush across his face wasn’t too obvious.

You’re an idiot, Herondale.

Chapter Text

October-December 2014

After the trip to London and despite the fact that he hated he was doing it, Kit couldn’t help but linger when Jem collected the daily post. If Ty was going to get in touch, it would be via letter, he predicted, remembering his missive to Annabel. But as the weeks went by, and nothing appeared Mark’s advice echoed in his head, alongside Ellie’s, and Kit started putting the feelings that had spilled out from his brief encounter with Ty, back into the careful, protected place in his heart. For the most part.

And he set about opening up his heart again, like he had been advised. It was good timing too - while last year he had been the strange American transfer kid - Kit was definitely noticing different glances coming his way in his second year as he passed through Altofts’ halls. He practised various smiles, winks and flirting with the girls and the occasional boy, noting the response. Testing out the waters, as it were. He struck out but less often than he thought he would. He ignored the unwanted voice in his head that sounded like his dad, approvingly telling him that marks always fell for a pretty face.

*

It was fascinating, Kit thought, that such small touches could elicit so many responses. He nibbled again at Eamonn’s earlobe, feeling the other boy jerk slightly with pleasure, and Kit smiled, planning his next move. He shifted across so he had a better vantage point, and looked down at the other boy, his shaggy brown hair spread across Kit’s pillow, and his lips red and puffy from where they had been kissing beforehand.

Eamonn sighed and Kit could feel his lips brush across Kit’s collarbone.

“Your body is seriously-” he trailed his fingers feather-light down Kit’s bare chest. Kit shivered with anticipation.

“I work out,” Kit said, modestly. But secretly, he was thrilled. Although he did kind of wish Eamonn could see his Marks- Kit thought they looked pretty cool against his still summer-tanned skin.

Eamonn laughed. “Yeah, I know you and Ade have the gym in his back garden. But somehow, the god of gains decided to bless you with much more fortune than most lads.”

“Are you complaining?” Kit said, in a teasing tone.

“Never,” said Eamonn solemnly. “In fact, I intend to pay tribute right now.” He slid his hand down further, and Kit could feel him starting to undo the button on Kit’s jeans, pushing the zipper down.

Suddenly Kit froze. He could hear Tessa coming down the hall. He pushed Eamonn’s hands away and rolled off the bed, Eamonn looking at him quizzically. Seconds later, he could hear a light knock.

Kit quickly threw on his t-shirt and cracked open the door. “Hi Tessa,” he said, trying to mostly keep Eamonn hidden from her view. He knew that while both Tessa and Jem knew he was seeing Eamonn, there was still a difference between seeing him and them getting too much of an idea.

“Neither Jem or I feel like cooking tonight so I’m planning to get some takeout. What would you fancy- fish and chips or curry?”

“Fish and chips,” he said quickly, and started to close the door. Tessa blocked him. ‘Don’t be rude,” she chided, a small smile on her face. “What does Eamonn want?”

“He’s good with fish and chips too,” Kit said. “Thanks!” He gave her a bright smile and closed the door.

“Now, where were we…” he said, crossing the clothes-covered floor back to the bed.

But Eamonn was sitting up, a distant look on his face and Kit knew the mood had been broken.

“Sorry about that,” Kit said. He came around and knelt on the floor in front of Eamonn. He slipped his shirt off again and gave his best Herondale smile, turning up the wattage and hoping it would be enough to distract the other boy.

“How did you even hear her coming?” Eamonn asked. “It was almost like you anticipated it.”

Kit considered how he could answer that question. Answers about angel blood giving him better hearing, and ancient demon-hunter training were unlikely to be met with seriousness.

He shrugged. “I just- did. I have a younger sister, remember?” He didn’t know when he had started to refer to Mina exclusively as his sister, but there it was. “You start to develop a sort of sixth sense about when other people are about…”

Eamonn studied him. “Okay,” he said, finally. “It’s not anything like… you know, you’re ashamed of us being- doing things? Or like- ashamed of me?”

Kit let out a short laugh. “Ashamed? Why?”

A red flush spread across Eamonn’s pale skin. “Oh, I don’t know- it’s just- you- I made passes all last year at you, and it took until about a month ago to get you to notice me. And then- we were at my place last week, and you kept knocking into things and it seemed a bit awkward at the end.”

Kit remembered the fantastic session they had had after football practice on Wednesday at Eamonn’s. Well… maybe there had been a few small teething problems.

“I mean, you have a single bed and we’re both not exactly small,” Kit told him. “Plus- that poster of Ronaldo kept staring down at me, and it freaked me out.”

“And then you ran out on my dad in the kitchen in the end,” Eamonn said, crossing his arms. Kit stared at him. Eamonn’s dad was a soft-soften Irish man who had nodded cheerfully at Kit and had asked him if he had watched the Chelsea-Arsenal game. All Kit could really do was nod, as he didn’t really follow football and so he had made his escape at the first opportunity.

“I guess it’s also like-” Eamonn flushed even more red. “You live here-” he gestured at Kit’s room and Kit saw it again for the first time in a while, through the eyes of Eamonn, beyond his mess of clothes and tangle of electronics, the heavy but well-made antique furniture and wooden beams and crafted windows. And he thought to the echoing, airy white hallways and the empty bedrooms all around him, and remembered how he had felt when he first arrived at Cirenworth.

And it clicked. Eamonn lived in a small, two-up, two-down mid-terrace house in Totnes.

Kit moved from the floor and sat down beside Eamonn on the bed. “Hey,” he said softly- drawing Eamonn’s arms down, and getting him to face Kit.

“No- absolutely not,” Kit said fiercely, once he had got Eamonn to meet his eyes. “Not one fucking iota am I ashamed.” He shook his head. “Look- I’m a bit more… private about doing stuff but that’s also ‘cause I…” he tried to think about a good way to explain his childhood, about trying to make himself as small as possible and not cause trouble for his father. And still tried not to cause trouble for Jem and Tessa.

“I also grew up with just my dad but mine was…” he tried to think of a good way to explain Johnny Rook. “We didn’t have- we lived in a bungalow, in a rough neighbourhood of L.A. and we didn’t always have much money. My dad was busy with his own stuff and I had to just do my own thing and keep out of his way, y’know?” He didn’t know if Eamonn would.

“And then my dad died and I came here to live with Tessa and Jem and it’s so different from what I grew up with but ummm, they’re great- so much, and they really, really don’t care about us- like, they like you.” He made sure to stress that point to Eamonn. “Any weirdness is completely on my end- I am sometimes a bit of a mental case. But I’m not ashamed. Of you. Or of us.”

He stopped talking. He could see Eamonn scanning his face, and he held himself still, hoping that the half-explanation would work. A small smile blossomed on Eamonn’s face and Kit could feel a smile mirroring on his own.

“You are a strange one,” Eamonn told him but he moved his hands out of his pockets and he started to lean forward. “But I admit it, I’ll take the apology and ignore the rest.”

“Plus, I have a fucking awesome body,” Kit reminded him, as he let Eamonn pull him down onto the bed.

“And so modest too…”

*

With Kit’s love life sorted, he turned his attention to other important pursuits, like finally getting his full driver’s license.

“How long do you think you’ll be?” Tessa asked. She dropped him off in front of the driving school entrance, the windshield wipers whipping the torrential October rain away.

“Not long at all,” Kit assured her. He had been practicing all summer and he was ready.

Less than an hour later, he texted her.

“Oh Kit,” she said, clearly reading the disappointment on his face after he had climbed in the passenger side.

Kit covered his face with his hands in frustration. “One major and two minors,” he said, shaking his head.

“I don’t understand what that means… but you’ll get it next time, love,” she told him, her voice sympathetic. “How soon can you rebook?”

*

Jem looked at Kit, his face expressing the same bewilderment that Kit felt. “I don’t understand? You’ve handled so many situations while we were practising- including that one with the bull…”

“British driving instructors are savage,” Kit said. “Three minors this time. One of them involving incorrect use of the handbrake.” He shook his head sadly.

*

Kit entered the film room at Cirenworth, carrying a bowl of popcorn, turning to where Ade and Ellie were sitting. Given how quickly they sprang apart, he thought they had probably been ‘snogging’ before he arrived.

He raised one arm up. “Finally, I have returned victorious and have in my hot little hands, one full British driving license.”

They both gave him golf claps and Kit sketched a shallow bow. “Congratulations,” Ade said. “How many times in the end?”

“Six.”

Ellie snorted with laughter, and Kit reached for some popcorn and threw it at her, which she dodged like the seasoned pro she was.

*

Jem and Tessa were fairly chill about Kit taking their second car - a Ford Civic - out whenever he felt like it, and Kit revelled in it. Mostly it was used to visit friends but occasionally there were trips further afield.

It was a clear, cold late autumn night and Kit was shivering in a narrow alleyway outside the Exeter nightclub as Ellie tried to light a cigarette. She looked over at him. “Are you cold, L.A. boy?” she said, finally getting her lighter to catch. The flame lit up her face in the dim light, illuminating her blue eyes and corresponding blue-green locks.

“It’s November,” Kit pointed out. He was wearing, like her, a skin-tight sleeveless shirt. Unlike Ellie, he was not wearing a mini-skirt but a pair of tight jeans. And eyeliner, which Ellie assured him would make him look older, given they were relying on fake IDs as they were still underage. He wasn't sure it made a difference but he had to admit, he liked the look.

“So?” She exhaled, letting the smoke drift towards the darkness behind them. The effect was ruined by her coughing.

Kit shook his head.

“What was that in there?” Ellie asked. “You were suddenly like a bloodhound catching a scent- you already have a boyfri-”

“Eamonn’s not my boyfriend,” Kit warned her.

Ellie waved her arms, tossing away her cigarette butt. “Okay- fine. We can discuss your relationship status later. But you just disappeared like-”

“We’re not attached at the hip, Ellie,” Kit said, trying to shut her down. He couldn’t tell her the truth. He had seen two, good-looking men watching him at the bar, and while maybe it would normally be flattering... the bottom of Kit’s stomach had dropped out when one of the men had turned and Kit had caught a glimpse of the tips of his ears, which were delicately pointed. Fae.

So naturally, Kit had bolted- he was out on his own with Ellie and he didn’t have any weapons with him, except his Herondale dagger, in his bag, which he had checked into the coatroom, so he was totally justified in leaving. But Ellie had followed him out of the fire exit and...

There was a noise in the alleyway, and Kit whirled around. He felt for the small pouch at the side of his jeans, and he pulled out his witchlight, trying to see in the far corners.

“Whoa, you are jumpy tonight,” Ellie said, coming up behind him. “Did you take something? Someone slip you something?”

“Nope,” Kit told her, scanning the tops of the rubbish bins at the back and then turning to face her. It seemed like the coast was clear but he was not in a mood to wait around to get jumped.

“Ooookay,” Ellie said, unconvinced. She pulled at his hands, peering up and trying to check his pupils, he suspected.

“Look- I’m fine- I’m just not in the mood to dance anymore,” Kit told her, giving her the favourite 'cross my heart gesture'. “I’ll just wait out in the car.”

Ellie pulled a face. “Ahhh, piss.” She shook her head. “It’s no fun to dance alone. Fine- we’ll come back another weekend. Let me just get my coat.” Her eyes darted down to Kit’s witchlight.

“Cool torch,” she said, and then she narrowed her eyes. “Does it have some of those weird runes on it…?”

Kit quickly pushed it back into his pocket. “No, it’s just something I picked up in an antique store.” His skin prickled, not only from the cold and he could swear he could feel eyes watching him from somewhere. He tried to discreetly herd Ellie back towards the door.

“You are acting sketchy as hell,” she informed him but she followed him back inside.

*

This time, he knew he couldn’t not let Tessa and Jem know. “And did you observe any sigils that might indicate if they were of the Unseelie or Seelie Court?” Jem asked again for a second time, his knuckles white on the back of the chair. Tessa stood against the fridge, her hands wrapped around a big mug of tea, and her grey eyes grave as she listened to him explain the situation.

Kit sighed. “No- again, it was mostly dark but I swear they were watching me.”

“It could be a coincidence…” Tessa mused, pushing back a long strand of brown hair behind her ear. “The Fae are fond of dancing and they do frequent mundane night clubs.”

“Yeah, but-” Kit knew he’d have to come clean. “Look- don’t be mad, okay? But when I was in London, I briefly went to the London Shadow Market- I didn’t go inside,” he said hastily, watching the floor, not wanting to see their reactions. “But Hypatia was there, and she warned me off- said there were whispers from the courts, looking for the Lost Herondale.”

He looked up, tentatively. “I’m sorry-.”

Jem shook his head. “It doesn’t matter, Kit,” he said, his voice calm and kind. “What matters is keeping you safe.” He exchanged a glance with Tessa, and they seemed to be communicating silently.

“I’ll call Catarina,” Tessa said, setting down her tea. “She and Ragnor said recently they’ve found a glamour that should be stronger than the one we’re currently using.” She looked over at Kit. “You should head up to bed- we’ll hopefully have a better idea in the morning what we can do.”

Kit felt miserable as he crept up the stairs. He couldn’t immediately sleep- was he always going to be looking over his shoulder for faerie assassins? That had been the fate of his mom, and many of his ancestors. He pulled out his witchlight, the light winking on and off under his fingers, letting memories of a beach in L.A. and a certain silver-eyed boy offer a brief distraction.

The next morning when Kit came down to breakfast there were two guests sitting at the table, a pretty blue-skinned woman with shockingly-bright white hair and kind, electric-blue eyes... and Shade.

Or Ragnor Fell, as Kit now knew his name was.

Kit paused in the doorway, feeling hesitant. He knew they were some of Tessa’s closest friends but did they have to stare so much?

“Hi,” he said, pulling out a plate and piling it high with some of Jem’s perfect bacon, and toasted himself a crumpet. Considering the ongoing silence from the table, he shrugged internally, and sat down across from them. He started eating.

“Good lord, what do they put in English bacon?” Shade- Ragnor’s voice was still ornery but kind. He had placed one of his green hands over Catarina’s. “You’re certainly not the skinny boy I met in the London Shadow Market a couple years ago.”

Kit shrugged. “I grew.”

Catarina still looked like she had seen a ghost. “Hi Kit-” she said. “I’m Catarina.” She looked him up and down, and suddenly smiled. “Apologies for staring but you- you reminded me of someone when you came in.”

“Another Herondale?” Kit asked. Given warlocks were long-lived, he imagined probably Catarina had met one or several of his ancestors.... or- a memory swam to the surface of Tessa and Jem explaining who had rescued his ancestor after the Clave had passed judgment. "You're- you rescued, you're the reason why I exist! I mean... like from way way back," he said. "You rescued him."

“Yes, another Herondale,” Catarina confirmed. Kit thought she was blinking back tears. "Ephraim. Perhaps today isn't the best time but I'd like to tell you about him, someday."

“Yeah, I'd like that," Kit said, giving her a smile. He was definitely up for learning more about his family.

The pitter patter of tiny feet clattered into the kitchen, and Mina ran into the kitchen, stopping in front of the table. She heaved herself into Kit’s lap, and from that vantage point, she gave Catarina a smile and Ragnor a suspicious look. Ragnor returned it with one of his own.

Tessa appeared in the doorway, and she noticed Kit. “Oh good, you’re up. We should start soon, as Ragnor and Catarina have to head back to the Scholomance this afternoon.”

*

“So, explain again how this is going to work?” Kit asked, feeling slightly nervous as the three warlocks each took up positions at the corners of the triangle that he was standing in the middle of.

Tessa gave him a reassuring smile. “It’s a confounding spell. It hasn’t been used for almost a century but according to Spiral Labyrinth research, it was successfully performed by warlocks to protect several Faerie consorts who escaped the Unseelie’s King’s court after they fell out of his favour.”

“Very powerful glamour,” Ragnor said, gruffly. “It’ll keep attention diverted from you. Anyone who is Fae will find their attention wandering- they’ll see a blank space, even if you’re right under their nose.” He flicked through the pages of a tattered, spellbook. “At least, that’s the claim.”

“And what about others- other Shadowhunters, or Downworlders, or mundanes?” Kit asked. Was he about to become a shadow of a person, unable to interact with the world?

“They’ll still be able to see you,” Catarina reassured him. She raised her arms, and the warlocks began the spell.

*

Kit had excused himself afterwards, escaping upstairs to the recently-restored Sky Room, an open room at the front of the house, with two circular skylights and a large bay window that showcased the beautiful countryside and hills that led up to Cirenworth's long, winding drive. He had shivered as he felt the ghostly magic settle around him, but otherwise, he didn’t feel any different. Except the unsettling feeling of walls closing in on him felt too real. Maybe he needed to go for a run - but wait - was that even safe anymore? He took a deep breath and started to turn- and watched as Ragnor slipped into the room. Too late.

Kit lifted his chin, as he nodded in the green-hued warlock’s direction. “I just needed a bit of-”

Ragnor held up a hand. “No need to explain.” His black eyes took in Kit. “It’s hardly a cure-all but it should last until-”

“Until what?” Kit asked, unable to keep the bitterness out of his voice. “Until the Fae find another way to find me? Until I’m ready? Ready for what- I’m training for Shadowhunting but I doubt those skills will keep me alive against whatever the Fae have planned. And despite Tessa and I throwing the entire kitchen sink at it, we’re no closer to finding out how my powers work.”

He looked over at Ragnor. “Although, apparently that was you.” He remembered the rumour that had been spread around post-battle.

Ragnor studied him. “No, you’re right- that won’t necessarily keep you alive,” he said.

Kit snorted. “Anyone ever tell you that you’re bad at comfort?”

“Plenty, including you, a couple years ago,” Ragnor said. “Let me finish though- as I was saying, that won’t necessarily keep you alive on your own, but it will allow you to finish your training, and maybe even find the key to your power. But that also won’t be enough. You’ll need to surround yourself with allies- with people you can trust. Then, maybe you’ll have a chance.” He tilted his head, considering Kit. “People like Tiberius Blackthorn.”

“Maybe you didn’t hear but he and I are no longer on speaking terms,” Kit said, blinking at the sudden mention of Ty.

“I am aware of the ill-fated attempt to raise his sister, even after I did everything to dissuade you,” Ragnor said, a grim note entering his voice. “But I have been at the Scholomance now for a couple years, and I am aware of the most promising students. Tiberius is aware of his past errors and he’s come a long way since then. If you’re looking for my advice - find him, as well as others you can trust,” he said.

“I’ll think about it,” Kit said after a moment, reluctant. “Except I’m not allowed to tell people about the First Heir stuff, don’t you know- I’m supposed to be hiding.”

“Oh, I suspect that will soon be ending,” Ragnor said, as footsteps echoed down the hall and they could hear Jem, Tessa and Catarina approaching. “The hiding, I mean.”

*

Despite Kit - alongside Jem and Tessa - acting extra cautious following Catarina and Ragnor’s visit, it was almost surreal how normal the period leading up to Christmas felt. Kit went to college, did his homework, made out with Eamonn, hung out with Ellie, Ade and other friends, and fit in his training with Jem, as if there were no other issues. It almost felt like a bad dream, the threat of the Fae. But Kit couldn’t help but remember Ragnor’s prediction about the hiding.

Kit was holding Mina’s hand as they wandered among the Christmas market stalls in Newton Abbot, Tessa and Jem trailing beside them.

“Kitty- chocco,” Mina tugged at the chocolate hearts, and Kit bent down to grab one. He paid the vendor and opened the package, passing one to her. “Don’t give her too many,” Tessa warned. “Or she won’t eat dinner.”

Kit winked at Mina. “Only one more, okay Min?” He slipped her two and she immediately foiled the ruse by running off and showing Jem her treasures. He’d have to work on her subterfuge skills, Kit thought.

Tessa moved up beside him. “How would you feel about a Christmas outside of Devon this year?” she asked. “Jace and Clary sent a fire message - they’re having Magnus, Alec and the kids at the Institute this year and asked if we’d like to join them.”

“Yeah- of course!” Kit didn’t even have to think about it. He’d barely been to New York before- only briefly with Jem to the Shadow Market. He was also curious and keen to visit an actual working Institute - especially one run by Jace and Clary.

“Great, I’ll let them know,” Tessa said, tucking her long scarf further into her peacoat.

“It’ll be alright with- you know what,” Kit said. “Actually- Tessa...” He started to broach a topic he had been considering. “I’ll go on one condition- I want to tell them about the First Heir. About it being me.”

Tessa stared at him, and he could see both love and worry warring on her face.

“I think that’s a good idea, Kit,” Jem’s soft voice was behind him, but he swiftly moved into Kit’s view, Mina cuddling into his shoulder. “There’s only so much we three can do. You should have friends who know- and can help.”

Tessa slowly nodded. “You’re right,” she said finally. “We’ll tell only Alec, Magnus, Jace and Clary though- it would be best it's kept still within a small circle.”

“That works,” Kit said. “Oh- and one more thing.”

Tessa looked at him with trepidation.

“We can’t leave before the 19th. Ellie’s play opens that night, and as it’s her first leading role, if I miss it - forget Faerie assassins- she won’t let live past the night,” Kit said, grinning.

Chapter Text

December 2014-January 2015

The reveal that Kit was a descendant of the First Heir didn’t go how he pictured it in his head.

“Oh- yeah, we know,” Jace said, from where he sat sprawled across a wide sofa. “We figured it out a while ago.”

“Had our suspicions,” Clary corrected, at the head of the sofa. “Magnus confirmed them. But we thought we should wait until you felt comfortable telling us about it.”

Kit looked between them, Magnus and Alec, and Izzy and Simon, all of them sitting or perching on the comfortable seating in Jace’s office and all of whom shrugged and nodded.

He felt relief but then also a flash of fear and he threw a glance over to see Jem and Tessa also looking disquieted.

Alec caught it and he moved to dispel their worries. “I doubt it’s gone beyond anywhere in this room,” he said, holding his hands out in a reassuring gesture. “As Consul, I get a lot of intelligence passing through my hands and I haven’t seen any hint of it mentioned.”

His eyes scanned over Kit, assessing and Kit knew that as much as Alec was the same quiet, comforting presence he had been in the London Institute or at Cirenworth, he was also the Consul, which meant he also had to think strategically. And Kit, like it or not- was a potential weapon for the Nephilim. Or, could be- if he wasn’t broken and knew how to use his powers.

But that was a question for another time, as the discussion moved on to wider talk about recent news about the Seelie and Unseelie Courts and the latest updates on the breakaway Cohort Shadowhunters in Idris.

“Hey,” Jace said, as he led Kit back towards the training room. He stopped in front of the door and Kit paused. “I uh- I know what it’s like to be different from other Shadowhunters… if you ever need any advice,” Jace trailed off.

“Yeah…” Kit said. “But you also have an extra dose of angel blood- all I have is ‘dirty faerie blood’.”

He remembered the slurs Mark Blackthorn had faced from the Centurions and the Cohort. He wasn’t looking forward to it, even though it would happen eventually.

“Doesn’t matter,” Jace said fiercely. “And even when it does come out more widely, you know we’ll have your back, right? And those who matter won’t care about it," he said. "But I also understand wanting the space to figure it out,” he paused. “Also- it’s much more effective to wow your opponents when you come back to the fight, all trained and buff- make it look effortless when you beat their asses, okay?”

Kit nodded. “Yeah, exactly! Those were my thoughts too…” he said.

Jace’s gold eyes took in Kit and his grin had a wicked edge. “Right- shall we go in and show them what Herondales are made of?” He swung the door open to reveal the training room where Beatriz was putting a couple Academy graduates through their paces.

In the last days leading up to Christmas, Kit spent most of his time there, eager to see how he matched up against Shadowhunters his own age. To his surprise he fared fairly well, particularly in the hand-to-hand combat (he thanked Jem’s insistence that they always end their training sessions with a short bout of martial arts practice) and short-range weapons. Long range weapons on the other hand... Kit knew he had to improve there, as Isabelle Lightwood dodged an ill-fated throw and glared at him, the look in her eyes almost as sharp as his poorly thrown dagger. The other two teens - Darren Penhallow and Sarah Yardshead - for their part, were distantly friendly but often watched Kit warily, particularly when Jace infrequently appeared and Kit could hear their murmurs around ‘Herondales.’

When he wasn’t training, Kit shadowed Jace around, taking in the bustle of an actual working Institute and its routines. There was a lot more paperwork than he would have thought, Kit mused.

Then it was Christmas Eve and the Institute cleared out of all but the core group, and Kit managed to relax into the routines of the holiday season. He received some especially good presents on Christmas Day - a dark blue bomber jacket with a sheepskin-lined fleece from Jem and Tessa, a set of throwing knives from Jace and Clary, and a couple of books on Faerie lore from Magnus and Alec.

Still, after a few days of watching bad Christmas television and eating leftovers, Kit was intrigued when Jace appeared in gear and gestured mysteriously to him. He slipped a sleepy Mina out of his lap and over to Tessa and then follow Jace out of the warm room to find Clary and Simon in the corridor, also in gear and carrying weapons.

“We’re going on patrol,” Clary said, her green eyes assessing him. “Are you interested?”

“Hell yeah!” Kit said with enthusiasm, and he raced off to change.

They ran into a pack of Raum demons in the shadowy base of Brooklyn Bridge and Kit could feel his blood singing and adrenaline rushing through as he swung his seraph blade alongside the others, dispatching demon after demon.

Out of the corner of his eye he could see Jace moving with a swiftness that almost looked like dancing, his body a blur of movement and deadly grace.

Afterwards, he looked over at Kit, with a questioning look and Kit grinned at him. “That was fun- where are the rest?” he said. Simon stopped short as he walked up to them and heard Kit's reply. “Great- now we have not one but TWO Herondales to deal with,” he said, with a mock groan.

“You love us,” Jace said, with a wink at Kit.

Kit joined several more patrols before the end of the visit- sometimes with a small group, sometimes just him and Jace.

It was their last night before heading back to Devon, and he and Jace were perched on the parapet of a high rise building overlooking Central Park. Kit almost didn’t mind the height. Almost.

“What’s your plan after the spring?” Jace asked him casually.

“Hmm?” Kit was concentrating on not looking down but scanning the dark line of trees for movement.

“I know you’re planning to finish out your mundane school,” Jace said. “But after that- you’ll be eighteen, right?”

“Yeah,” Kit said. He had only a vague idea of what he was going to do… the deadline for UCAS was shortly after they returned but Kit knew instinctively he wasn’t going to be applying for any universities. But he hadn’t really made any other plans.

“A lot of Shadowhunters do travel years when they reach that age,” Jace replied. “Get experience in different institutes.”

“Oh, yeah I guess,” Kit said.

Jace cleared his throat, and Kit looked over. It almost looked like Jace was nervous. “I’ve been watching you- you’re really good, Kit. If you want, you could come to New York for some of your travel year. You can learn more on the ground- and we can help you figure this whole First Heir thing out,” he said. “I’d like that- I know Clary and the others would too.”

Kit stared at him. He’d miss Devon, and Tessa and Jem and Mina of course but... it hadn’t seemed real, Shadowhunter life. But Kit suddenly imagined what it could be like, living in New York, going on patrols, being more involved in what was his legacy.

“I’d like that- a lot,” he said slowly. “Yeah, let’s do it,” he said, more enthusiastically.

“Awesome,” Jace said, a relieved look crossing his face. He straightened up- “Oh- demon at your ten o’clock,” he said, and he stepped off the four story building without hesitation. Kit shook his head and prepared to follow.

*

Jace’s words echoed in Kit’s head and when they returned from New York Kit started stalking the local papers and local residents’ forums for any hint of unusual activity that might indicate demonic activity. Daily patrols would probably be better but given he was pretty sure he was the only active Shadowhunter in the Southwest of England, he had to be targeted in his approach. Plus, he still had papers to write for English Literature, and his final Film Studies project to work on…

But he couldn’t ignore it. He was a Shadowhunter, right? And practicing for demon hunting was probably more relevant to his future than a literary analysis of The Great Gatsby.

He debated bringing up his investigations to Jem and Tessa. “I noticed something odd,” Kit said, as they ate dinner one night in late January. Tessa looked up, and Jem paused in his daily wrestle with Mina to clean her face. Kit cleared his throat. “I think there’s some demonic activity near Torquay,” he said, and he quickly outlined his research.

Both Jem and Tessa were quiet after Kit finished and from the looks on their faces, he wasn’t sure they were convinced.

“When Magnus and I set up wards and checkpoints for unusual flares of magic across the county, it was for all kinds,” Tessa said. “Which would include demon attacks. I haven’t seen them flag anything in months.”

“Perhaps it’s still worth checking,” Jem said diplomatically. “We can visit the area on the weekend- if it is a demon it doesn’t sound like it’s moved yet to attack humans. You mentioned it was a mutilated cow carcass?”

Kit felt a sigh building internally. “Okay, fine,” he said.

“I know it must seem a bit dull after New York to come back to sleepy Devon,” Tessa said, her face full of sympathy. “But your time to patrol and save lives is coming, Kit.”

He agreed. But he had a nagging feeling there was something he had missed and the next evening, he slipped out with the excuse of working on his Film Studies project with Ellie. Kit slipped on his new bomber jacket - had to keep appearances. But in his backpack he had packed a change of gear, along with a selection of seraph blades, shuriken, and short throwing daggers. Along his arms, he inked fresh Equilibrium, Agility and Night Vision Marks.

It was probably nothing. But just in case, he could do some recon work ahead of him and Jem checking it out. He ignored the small internal voice warning about Faerie assassins - there hadn’t been anything to worry about since that time in November, plus he had the additional glamour protecting him now, he told himself.

The drive to Torquay was about half an hour from Cirenworth, and Kit put on some Bon Jovi for moral fortitude.

He parked his car outside the Kent Prehistoric Caverns, where he first had seen the clue on the local Devon Live website. The January air was cold and biting, particularly this close to the shore, and Kit kept his jacket on over his gear.

He carefully made his way through the caverns, sweeping his witchlight over the brown-red limestone walls and lightly made his way down the now-closed visitor trail, ducking under the rope separating the rest of the cave from the lit pathway. He wrapped his fist around the witchlight, dimming it as he headed in the dark, his skin still prickling with slight claustrophobia. Out of the corner of his eye, he could see several ghostly fires and figures huddled around them- the ghosts of this cavern were ancient- from around 10,000 years ago, from what Kit remembered when he had visited it earlier in the summer with Jem and Mina. Ghosts that old were more like faint imprints than proper spectral projections, and they didn’t disturb him as he methodically searched for clues of recent demonic presence.

Soon enough, his search paid off, He found scratch marks and blood spatters on the walls near the end of the cavern’s reach. It wasn’t definitive proof but it was something. Kit threw finger guns at the sabretooth tiger statue guarding the cave’s entrance as he left. “I’ll be back,” he said.

The next night, this time dressed in gear, Kit found more proof in the darkest depths of the caves - a bundle of foul black rags that looked like they had been dipped in ink that had dried. It wasn’t the nest but he was increasingly excited that he knew what he was dealing with. Kit had never been the best student when it came to Shadowhunter lore and he much preferred the physical training over learning demonic languages that sounded like a garbage disposal trying to mate with a lawnmower. But after his patrols with Jace, he had reviewed the different classifications of demons; he was sure this was a Harpyia demon- a birdlike demon that had wings made from rags instead of feathers.

Kit held his breath as he placed the rags into the bag he had brought. As he made his way back to the carpark, he paused. He knew he should bring the evidence back and show Jem… but he’d also have to explain why he had been out patrolling without a partner. Maybe… if he could track down the Harpyia down to its recent hunting grounds that would be the easier way to direct Jem to the hunt.

Kit drew the intricate Tracking rune on his left hand, connecting it to his evidence bag. Despite its messiness he could start to see the rune take effect, feeling the tug towards the Harpyia. He ran back to the car, and quickly reversed away and back out to the country road, eager to get underway.

*

His breath hanging in the air like grey smoke, Kit quietly closed the car door and carefully hopped up onto the low stone wall overlooking a dark field just outside of Torquay town limits. He had dropped the bag with the bloody rags onto the passenger seat, and in his left hand he held an unlit seraph blade. In his right, he held the silver Herondale dagger. With his Night Vision, he could see a herd of cows standing peacefully in the field, unaware of the large figure circling vulture-like over them. Bingo.

Kit slipped down, making his way back to the car. He started to lay his weapons down on the seat beside him; the seraph blade slipped down between the handbrake and the gearstick and Kit overbalanced as he grabbed at it. The car horn blared out into the silent night air and he gritted his teeth. Picking up the blade, he quickly looked out the window- shit, the demon was no longer in his eyeline. Kit sat, breathing silently as he dared and his eyes darted around to see if he could spot where it had gone. He couldn’t.

Blood rushing in his ears, Kit grabbed his stele, pushing up his sleeve. With only slightly trembling hands, he quickly inked a couple new Marks on his left forearm, knowing he’d need any help he could get. He had just finished the Talent rune when the car was suddenly rocked by a heavy weight landing on the roof, and Kit was thrown sideways across the seat. He scrambled over the back seat, and opened one of the doors, half-falling out onto the hard road. Ahead of him, he could see the large bulk of the Harpyia perched over the hood of his car. It hadn’t yet spotted that he had escaped from the vehicle, its beak pecking viciously at the front windshield.

Slipping his stele into his coat pocket, Kit transferred the seraph blade to his right hand, and named it. “Eriel,” he said, and it lit up, its heavenly light blazing in the dark night. The Harpyia turned and for the first time, Kit could see its large poison-yellow eyes, and rows of white teeth in its beak. Knowing he’d have a better advantage if he attacked first, he pressed forward, leaping onto the back of the car with one lunge and then the roof in the second, sweeping his blade forward.

The Harpyia screeched as it leaped backwards, its wings like a force of nature as they slammed into Kit. He was knocked off the car and as he landed heavily on his feet, he could feel a crack in his ankle and corresponding pain blossoming from the spot. But he couldn’t think about that now, as the Harpyia was over him, stabbing at him with its beak.

Kit rolled and ducked under its wings, and he directed the seraph blade into the meat of the Harpyia’s chest, hoping to connect with its vital organs. Black ichor spilled out, burning his fingers but the demon’s shriek sounded weaker and Kit went again for the same spot, then whipped around, wincing as he spun on his injured ankle, and tried for a head blow. It worked, to Kit’s relief, and the Harpyia shriveled up and disappeared into dust, just as his seraph blade sputtered and went out suddenly, leaving Kit in the dark. He slumped against the car door, breathing heavily, as if he’d run a mile sprint.

*

Kit eased himself into the back of the car, putting his injured ankle up onto the seat. From the brightness of the car’s interior light, he thought it looked puffy. He reached in his pocket for his stele to draw an iratze but his fingers closed on air. Kit cursed as he realised it must have fallen out while he was fighting. He went back outside, hopping on the other foot as he swept both his phone light and witchlight around an attempt to spot where it had gone. It wasn’t easily in sight and Kit could hear the small murmurings from the ditch where he suspected there was a small brook - likely it had been swept away.

He turned back to the car - luckily there were only a few scratches and small dents from the attack so Kit was fairly sure he could drive it back to Cirenworth where he could grab his other stele to heal his foot. He’d explain the whole situation in the morning to Jem, he thought, although he was still not looking forward to the situation. But there was only one problem, he realised - it was a manual car with two pedals, and there was no way he was going to be able to drive back safely, given his ankle.

Kit sat there, imagining Jem’s disappointment when he pulled up and he made his choice. He pulled out his phone and texted Ade. u up, mate?

It was just before eleven, so Kit thought that it was likely. He would’ve considered Ellie but he suspected she’d asked too many questions. Also, he knew Ade had first aid training so he was probably better for the situation given his ankle was now really hurting.

There was no reply. Kit sighed and decided he’d bite the bullet. He texted Ellie, expecting the near instantaneous response that he usually got. Nothing.

Kit frowned and dialled her number.

“Kit?” It was Ade replying. “Mate, you have bad timing-” Ah- Kit suddenly realised the situation. He could hear Ellie in the background asking who it was.

“Sorry- I wouldn’t normally but I’m in a bit of a situation,” he said. Ellie’s voice said something and Ade came back to him. “Not gonna pretend I understand this- but is it a pizza situation?”

Kit sighed. “Yeah, it is.”

*

Ade looked up from where he was crouching down by Kit’s side. “You’ve properly fucked this ankle.”

Kit winced. “I know.”

“You should probably get it seen in urgent care,” Ade said, closing his first aid kit. “I can wrap it and we can drop you off there.”

“No, just- can you drop me off at my place?” Kit knew that he’d be fine if he could just get to his stele.

“Mmm, you should probably-” Ade looked at him doubtfully but then relented when he saw Kit’s expression. “Okay, sure.”

“Hold on, we’re not going anywhere until you explain what the hell you were doing out here, dressed like an extra from Mission Impossible-” Ellie said, her eyes taking in Kit’s gear. He had thrown all of his weapons into the trunk before they had arrived.

“Cow wrestling? Extreme Parkour? Night photography?” Kit threw out suggestions. Damn, he should have gone with that last one as it sounded almost plausible.

Ellie gave him a look, and beyond her he could see Ade also looking distinctly unimpressed.

Ade stood. “Well- whatever it is, I’m cold and need to be up early for college, so here’s the plan- Ellie will drive your car back and I’ll follow, okay?”

Kit could just imagine the grilling he would get from Ellie on the way back, but he knew there was no other way. He’d just have to think fast. “Sure.”

Kit glanced over at Ellie, watching as she tapped her fingers on the steering wheel as she drove. He leaned forward to turn the radio on to cover the awkward silence. Her hand shot out and she stopped him, pushing up his sleeve in the process. Kit could see Ellie’s eyes dart briefly to his freshly drawn Marks and he felt his heart sink.

“What’re those?” she asked flatly. “They’re new.”

“They’re just- I’ve had them-” Kit knew he was floundering.

“No. Stop- stop fucking gaslighting me, Kit,” Ellie said. Her voice was tight with anger. “I thought we’re supposed to be friends. I know there’s something you’re not telling me- and you can’t keep expecting me to not notice.”

Kit took a deep breath but then he noticed a dark shape flying towards them in the sky, getting closer. His eyes widened and he shouted- but it was too late. The second Harpyia demon slammed into the windshield, and Kit felt his seatbelt constrict against his chest and his head slam back, as the car skidded off the road.

Fighting back after a few seconds of dazed confusion, Kit’s instincts kicked in and he quickly unbuckled his seatbelt, kicking open the door as he looked over at Ellie. She was groaning and he could see a small cut on her face from the shattered glass of the windshield. But her eyes were fluttering open and Kit took that as a sign that she wasn’t badly hurt.

He scrambled out and ran around to the trunk, yanking it open and frantically grabbed several seraph blades and shuriken, attaching them to his weapons belt while keeping an eye overhead for the demon. He could see it circling in for another pass.

“Kit!” Ade jogged up to him, and Kit could see that he had parked his car a few feet behind him. His face was confused and worried as he took in the car and Kit’s frantic actions. “What the hell is happening?”

“Get down- go check on Ellie,” Kit yelled, and pushed Ade towards the other side of the car. “I’ll deal with this.”

“What the fuck is this?” Ade said, his voice growing louder with anger, and Kit remembered that he probably couldn’t see the Harpyia.

Problems to deal with later as he could see it coming towards them, its massive claws outreached. “Michael,” Kit named the blade, and he could feel his muscles straining as he engaged with the demon. He was so focused on keeping it away and the heat of the battle, that he almost forgot he had hurt his ankle. Unfortunately, it had not gone away and stabs of pain distracted him as he hurried the Harpyia, trying to get a good angle. He threw several shuriken with his free hand but as it was his non-dominant hand they landed at the far edges of the creature’s wings, barely wounding it.

Talons swiped at his face, and Kit could feel them briefly connect with a stinging pass. He took a step back, jarring his ankle again as he stumbled on the uneven ground. The Harpyia screeched, rearing up for another strike at him.

Then suddenly it whipped around, and Kit could see a small figure standing just behind it. Ellie, holding one of Kit’s rapiers; she looked scared but furious. A few feet behind her, he could see Ade holding a large rock in his hand, his face set grimly. Kit’s heart was in his mouth and he struggled to his feet, propping himself up on a knee.

He needed to get to his friends. There was no way they could stand against it. Ellie was holding the sword in a classic stage-fighting pose as the Harpyia edged closer to her. It looked like it was about to strike. Kit hobbled forward, seraph blade outstretched.

But he was too late. It struck, lightning-fast, like a rattlesnake and Ellie screamed.

Kit’s training and adrenaline took over, and he slashed and parried, managing to drive the Harpyia back, squawking as it flew off. Kit knew it would be back but that was unimportant right now. He ran.

He and Ade reached Ellie’s crumpled form at the same time. Ade moved her gently onto her back, Kit helping him. His hands were suddenly slick with liquid, and he could see her torn shirt glistening in the moonlight with blood, and there were other areas that looked like torn up muscle… and other stuff. Kit wanted to throw up.

“Ellie, Ellie-” Kit said, helplessly- he held her hands. She looked up at him, confusion on her face and he could see her struggling to breathe, a frothy sound coming from her throat.

“You’ve gotta- Ellie, love- just breathe,” Ade’s voice was low and calm, beside Kit. He pulled off his jacket and balled it up, pressing it up against her stomach tightly. He looked over and Kit could see the fear in his eyes. “We need to get her to a hospital now.”

Kit could hear it in Ade’s voice: Ellie was going to die if they didn’t move. She still might. And there was a demon coming around for another pass at them. “Hold this-” Ade moved Kit’s hands down roughly to the balled up jacket on Ellie’s stomach, as he pulled out his phone.

Kit felt a sensation building in him, similar to the time he was on the battlefield in Idris. His Talent rune began to burn, almost like a brand on his arm. But this time, instead of cold fire, he could feel warm, golden heat building in his veins. It started pooling down towards his hands and he could see a golden glow begin to emanate from them. Suddenly, the feeling rocketed, and he could see the glow pulse and pass from his hand down through Ade’s jacket. Ade paused, his phone halfway out.

A large shriek echoed overhead, and Kit looked up, seeing the Harpyia almost upon them. With instinct, Kit threw one of his hands up, as if to ward it off, and there was a sudden burst of golden light shooting from his hand. The Harpyia exploded, a shower of stinking rags and black ichor suddenly raining down on them.

The scene in front of him started swimming in front of his eyes, and Kit held desperately onto consciousness. He fell onto his knees, beside Ellie, and he could feel Ade gripping his shoulders. “I’m fine…” Kit pushed him away.

“WHAT was that?!” He could hear Ellie’s voice in the background. He looked up to see her pushing away a hovering Ade. The jacket covering her fell away and he could see Ade frown, as he lifted up Ellie’s blood-stained shirt. The previously-torn skin was now a smooth, gleaming surface, like it had never been touched. Ade sat back, dumbfounded and he looked over at Kit.

“You!” Ellie’s eyes were shining, as she pointed at Kit. “You’re- a fucking wizard, Kit!” She looked triumphant. “I knew there was something strange about you. I KNEW it.”

*

They ended up taking Ade’s car back to Cirenworth, Kit’s Ford being completely totalled from the attack. Kit sat in the back, feeling utterly drained. He put off the inevitable questions by telling Ellie and Ade that he’d explain everything when they got back- Ellie looked prepared to argue until Ade pulled her aside and whispered something and she looked over at Kit and nodded.

His whole body ached- including the now-pulsating pain from his ankle. As they pulled into Cirenworth’s driveway, Kit could feel the anxiety ball in his stomach coalesce into a cold, pulling sensation and he swallowed hard, imagining Jem and Tessa’s reactions. He had texted them briefly, so they would be up. He knew he had absolutely fucked up tonight, and he knew they had all been very lucky to survive the encounter with the demon.

They were both waiting in the doorway, as Kit slowly limped up, his arm around Ade’s shoulder. Tessa and Jem took in his torn clothes and bloody arms, and Ellie’s blood-stained clothes, even though she was absolutely fine now from whatever Faerie healing magic Kit had done.

It was dark and Kit couldn’t read their expressions well. “Come inside and I’ll put the kettle on,” Tessa said, putting her arms around Ellie, as Jem came to help Ade with Kit.

*

Both Ade and Ellie watched with fascination as Jem carefully unwrapped Kit’s ankle and examined it, then drew an iratze just above, on his calf. “It’s broken in a couple places,” he told Kit. “The iratze can only heal so much. You’ll still need to keep weight off it for a couple days.” His face was as calm and tranquil as always but Kit thought he could see a flash of emotion passing through his eyes. He’s furious, Kit thought, miserably. He nodded at Jem, not trusting himself to speak. Jem moved to look at the ichor burns on his hands, cleaning out the cuts with a clean cloth, and taking out a salve to rub into the burns.

Ade looked like he wanted to ask Jem some questions, his eyes flicking down to the iratze but at that point Tessa came back into the parlour room, with a tray filled with tea and biscuits. She set it down and took a seat in the armchair across, her sharp eyes quickly assessing the situation.

“Anyone else hurt, other than Kit?” Jem asked.

Both his friends shook their heads. “But Ellie was before Kit healed her,” Ade said. “It was absolutely mental- she had major blood loss and her stomach and chest were torn up- I think she had punctured a lung.”

Both Jem and Tessa swung their gaze to Kit. “Yeah- I uh-was able to heal her with my power,” Kit said.

“Plus, he made the creature attacking us explode,” Ellie interjected.

“It was very fortunate that Kit was able to summon the ability to do so,” Jem said gravely. “Otherwise, it could’ve been much worse.” Kit could feel Tessa’s gaze burning into him.

Kit quickly filled in the rest of the night’s events for Jem and Tessa, Ellie occasionally adding in a comment, while Ade stayed quiet.

When he finished, there was silence until Ellie spoke. “Okay, so… spill the tea,” she said. “What kind of wizards are you- you’re wizards, right? Or has J.K. Rowling led us wrong all these years?” Ade’s gaze kept darting back and forth between them all, and Kit couldn’t read his expression completely but thought he looked nervous.

Despite the serious situation, Tessa’s lips twitched with amusement while as always, Jem looked absolutely lost at the pop culture references. “Actually- I’m a warlock,” she said. “But I think we should let Kit explain- we’ll fill in when necessary.”

And so Kit gave a brief summary of Shadowhunting history, the Downworld, and a very heavily edited version of his own history, with Jem and Tessa chiming in occasionally. He didn’t mention the First Heir stuff but did mention that he was laying low from the Downworld, due to his family’s history.

There was silence after he finished. “Wow-” Ellie said. Ade again didn’t say anything, just continued to sip his drink, his dark brown eyes assessing the situation. His continued silence made Kit feel worse.

“It’s a lot to take in,” Tessa said. “I think it’s best that you both stay overnight here, get out of your bloodstained clothes and we can figure out what story to tell your parents in the morning.”

“Does this mean that you’re not going to erase our memories?” Ellie asked hopefully. “I totally thought that’s what you were going to do.”

“If that was the case, El, why would they have given us an explanation?” Ade said logically.

“Point-” Ellie said. She looked over at Kit. “We have so much to go over, Kit Herondale.”

Kit nodded. It seemed like they both were taking their near-death situation - alongside the knowledge that their friend was a hunter of demons - better than he had thought they would.

As Tessa led them out to the guest bedrooms, Kit started to hoist himself up but was stopped by Jem. “Let me get you a cane so you don’t put weight on your ankle,” he said.

By the time Jem returned, Kit had worked himself up into a state, imagining that Jem was about to yell at him. But that wasn’t Jem’s style, Kit reminded himself.

And it wasn’t - but it was much worse. Jem handed him the cane, and then sat across from him, face mostly unreadable. They sat there in silence, Kit staring at the floor. He was about to get up and go to bed when Jem spoke, his voice carefully neutral. “I’m disappointed in your judgment, Kit. I don’t know what you were thinking going out alone- and then calling your friends, instead of us. Harpyia always hunt in pairs.”

“I know, I know- I was so stupid, Jem- I’m sorry,” Kit said, the words tumbling out.

An emotion that Kit couldn’t read flashed over Jem’s face. He sighed, dropping his head briefly. “As Tessa said- best to pick this up in the morning.”

Kit nodded. He slowly made his way to his room. All the way up, and during the brief shower and then lying down on his bed, his heart thudded painfully in time with the words running in his head. Screw up, idiot, waste of space, they hate you, they won’t want you now

Early the next morning, he shuffled down to the kitchen and set the kettle boiling. He grabbed the biggest mug they had and spooned in a tablespoon of the instant coffee that Tessa always had to hand, and added in four tablespoons of sugar. The kitchen was quiet and peaceful, with no one else around. He pulled out his phone - six am. He sat at the table, and started to scroll mindlessly through social media, sipping at the sugar, caffeine-rich coffee. He had barely slept and his stomach was churning at the prospect of the conversations he was going to have to have later in the day - with Jem, with Tessa, with Ade, with Ellie....

There was a noise in the doorway, and Kit could see Jem standing there, a shadow in a green and blue striped bathrobe.

He came over to the table, and sat down with deliberation, his dark eyes watching Kit. He made an abortive move as if to speak but then thought better of it.

Kit braced himself. He knew Jem had a kind soul and was likely having trouble telling him the necessary plans that he and Tessa had made. “I’m sorry. Go ahead- let me know what I need to do or if, if- I uh, I need to leave. I know I betrayed yours and Tessa’s trust and I screwed up and nearly got my friends killed…” To Kit’s horror, he could feel his voice crack and the world in front of him blurred as tears started falling onto the table.

He could hear the kitchen chair creak as Jem leapt up and came to kneel by Kit’s chair. “Kit, Kit- look up, please,” he said. Kit brushed tears back and looked at Jem. “Listen to me- you’re not leaving- that never crossed my mind. Or Tessa’s. There’s absolutely nothing in the world you could do, that would stop me caring about you. That would stop me from loving you. You’re my-” Jem’s voice cracked with emotion. “You’re my son, and I love you, will love you, no matter what.”

He held Kit tightly as Kit’s tears continued to fall, hot and fast onto Jem’s shoulder, his body still shaking slightly as he tried to calm it down and focus on Jem’s words. Eventually, the shaking eased and he started to relax. “You were upset with me,” he whispered, barely able to believe Jem- but somehow he did.

“I was- because it was an incredibly ill-thought out plan but also... when you came in, covered in blood-” Jem told him, his voice muffled. “I was so scared. I can count on one hand the times that I had felt like that.” He leaned back from Kit, a wry smile crossing his face. “Tessa says it’s partly because I haven’t raised a teenager before.”

“I’m sorry,” Kit said again. “I know I keep saying it but I really am.”

“I know,” Jem replied. “I also want it to be known though, if you ever pull a stunt like that again, I will set Church as your twenty four hour bodyguard, and he will report to me and you’ll be responsible for cleaning out his litter basket for the rest of his natural life.”

Kit frowned. “Isn’t he functionally immortal?”

“Yes.” Jem was firm.

Kit took a deep, shuddering breath. “Totally fair. And it won’t happen again.”

There was a faint cry from Mina’s nursery and Jem started to turn. He paused but Kit nodded at him to go. “I’m okay.”

“We still have a lot to discuss-” Jem said. “Namely, the reappearance of your magic.” Kit nodded again.

*

Ade and Ellie came down shortly afterwards, Ellie wearing a borrowed dress of Tessa’s and Ade mostly in the same clothes, except for a borrowed hoodie of Kit’s. Ade shook his head at the offer of tea or food. “I’m gonna head back home- I think I could probably sneak back in without my parents noticing and it’ll cut down on the awkward questions.”

“Okay,” Kit said, trying to assess Ade’s reactions.

“Relax, mate-” Ade saw him looking. “We’re good. I’m not about to rat you out to the wizard cops or whatever,” he grinned. “Come around to the shed after classes though, yeah? I still have questions.” Kit quickly agreed, and Ade leaned over to Ellie and gave her a kiss before leaving.

“I’m not going anywhere yet,” she told Kit. “We have stuff to talk about.” Ellie sat down across from him. “You saved my life,” she said.

Kit winced. “Technically I also put your life in danger.”

She waved that away. “Semantics. I’m less upset about last night, although it was a rollercoaster of a night. I will probably have nightmares for a year,” she said, pausing dramatically. Ellie looked at him directly. “What I do have a problem with is you lying to me practically since we met.”

“You’re right, I did,” Kit said. “But also and this doesn’t make it right- not an excuse - but I kind of wasn’t supposed to mention any of this stuff to mundanes? But now you know, so no more lying, promise.” He crossed his heart and Ellie smiled.

“Okay, well... we can discuss what you can do to make it up to me,” she replied. She eyed the kettle. “After tea and breakfast.”

“Yeah, yeah,” Kit scrambled up to re-boil the kettle. Over several pieces of toast, Ellie asked questions at such a rapid-fire pace that Kit started feeling overwhelmed himself.

“So how come I can always see your tattoos?” she eventually asked. “I asked Ade about it, and he barely notices them.”

“I think you have something called the Sight,” Kit told her. “It’s an ability that allows you to see through Shadowhunter and Downworld glamour magic. Among other things.”

She sat up in excitement, nearly spilling her mug of tea. “What?? I’m not a full muggle?”

“Mundane,” Kit corrected. “Mmm, no- probably not. Somewhere in your ancestry, you have some Shadowhunter or Faerie blood.”

“Cool…” Ellie breathed. She pointed at Kit’s Marks, which were on full display, twining up his arms. “So I could wear those?” She held out an arm. “Draw one on me!”

“Ahh, no,” Kit said with alarm. He pushed her hand back down. “If I drew a rune on you, there’s a good chance you’ll end up as a sort of zombie, or die horribly screaming from internal combustion.”

Ellie’s eyes went large. “Oooh, right.” She went silent for a minute. “How do you become one, a Shadowhunter?” she asked. “Is it a bit like the muggleborns at Hogwarts? You have to go to a special school?”

“Yeah, pretty much,” Kit told her. “There’s an Academy. But afterwards there’s an extra step- you have to drink from this artifact called the Mortal Cup, and then you Ascend. Not everyone makes it though,” he added.

“What happens to them?”

Kit wasn’t entirely sure. “I don’t know. But they die. Probably from burning up. Raziel, that’s the Angel who gave the Shadowhunters their runes and magic, seems to be a ‘set things on holy fire’ type of guy.”

“Jeez, that’s grim,” Ellie said. “And they let teenagers choose to do that?”

“Yeah but they find it an acceptable loss,” Kit said. “I was only kind of lying when I said it was like a cult. It’s a- I didn’t grow up knowing I was a Shadowhunter. So a lot of things still shock me too.”

“Huh,” Ellie said. “I have more questions around that but let’s switch to a more interesting topic." She swirled her remaining tea, and drained it and gave Kit an intent look. “So… what hot Shadowhunter boy broke your heart in L.A.?”

Kit stiffened but he met her eyes with a challenge. “Who said-” and then he realised, actually maybe he did want to talk about Ty.

“Ty. Tiberius Blackthorn,” he said, in a low voice.

“Tiberius- wow, that’s a super YA fantasy novel name,” Ellie said, her eyes sparkling. She leaned forward. “Tell me more.”

“What’s very YA fantasy?” Tessa said, as she came into the kitchen with a yawn.

“Kit’s life,” Ellie said, with satisfaction. “It’s great.” She mouthed at him, later.

“Indeed, he does have adventures that would fit well within a YA novel,” Tessa said, ruffling Kit’s hair. Her voice was a mix of fondness and exasperation but after his conversation with Jem, Kit was no longer as scared as he had been. He leaned back, letting his mind wander as Tessa and Ellie started to debate the merits of a series called ‘A Court of Thorns and Roses’.

*

Luckily, Ade had fewer questions than Ellie. He looked up as Kit limped into the home gym and his easy smile also set Kit at ease.

“Hey, wizard boy,” he teased.

“Please, I am Mr Shadowhunter to you,” Kit said. “Sorry for almost killing you and Ellie by the way," he added quickly. "That hunt went south way too quickly but I should never have called you in the first place.”

Ade shook his head. “Mate, I was so sure when I woke up this morning that I had dreamed the whole thing.”

“Nope,” Kit said. “Sorry to burst that bubble. But Tessa did say that if you wanted… she can cast a memory spell so you’d forget or think you’d dreamed it.” He didn’t mention that she was still waiting outside for another five minutes in case he needed her.

“Nahh, I’m good, I’m good,” Ade said hastily.

“So… you said you had more questions?”

Ade nodded. Unlike Ellie, his questions were primarily about demons, how many there were, what kinds, did he have to worry about his family and friends with them? Kit was able to reassure him that demon attacks were rare and they generally happened in cities- but also, that Shadowhunters were usually patrolling in those cities. Ade nodded.

Then he asked: “Can I see them? Those tattoos that Ellie keeps talking about?”

Kit nodded, he had expected something like that, and he hadn’t bothered refreshing the glamours. He sat down on the nearest bench and pulled off his shirt. Ade came up and circled around him, taking in with a clinical eye Kit’s fresh, black runes, and the fading scars that even after only two years were already prominent on Kit’s torso.

He whistled. “You must do a lot more training than what we do here.”

“Yeah,” Kit admitted. “I train a lot with Jem. And sometimes others.”

“That’s a relief- I thought I was just crap at it,” Ade said, with a small smile. He gestured towards Kit’s Marks. “And these, they help you fight?”

Kit nodded, and started naming the different ones he had inked on his body and what they did.

Ade lingered on the iratzes, his gaze almost envious. “With those ones you must not have to go to the doctor very often.”

“I’ve never been,” Kit told him honestly. “Or not that I can remember.”

Ade was quiet for a minute. Kit assumed the questions were over and he pulled his shirt back on.

“Kit… you’re not going to uni, are you?” It was barely a question.

“No,” Kit said quietly. “To be honest, I don’t know if I’ll even get to finish my A-levels or stay at Cirenworth… things in the Downworld, in my life, are kinda in flux and I might have to leave suddenly.”

Ade nodded. “Yeah, I kind of thought that might be the case.” He looked over at Kit. “But look- even if you have to go off and be a big damn hero, don’t just disappear, okay? Keep in touch. I’d like to know we’re both out there, saving lives- me as a medic and you as a demon hunter.” He smiled but there was a sad cast to it.

Kit nudged him. “I’m not gone yet, mate.” He pointed to the set of weights. “You wanna do some sets?”

“God no,” Ade said. “After last night’s adventure, I could barely make it through classes today. Let’s go back inside and play some Ghost Recon.”

*

When Kit arrived back at Cirenworth, having been dropped off by Ade, his energy was flagging and he decided he would just head straight up to his room, feeling justified by the last day’s efforts.

But Tessa stopped him as he passed through the kitchen, and handed him something. “This came in the post today.”

Kit looked down and saw the heavy envelope with his name written in a spikey scrawl. His heart started pounding, as he realised what it was. A letter from Ty.

He stammered out a quick excuse to Tessa and raced up the stairs as quick as the cane and his ankle would allow. Once inside his room, he sat down on the bed, turning the letter over.

But suddenly, Kit was aware of another sensation - a warm feeling on his forearm, where his Talent rune was. He pushed his sleeve up and stared. The rune had turned a deep golden colour and he could see tendrils of the same colour running under his skin towards his hands, like his veins were filled with gold. From deep within his chest, Kit felt a peaceful, ancient power emanating out slowly and he could see the same golden colour gather in his palm, like a cold, unburning flame.

He yelled down. “TESSA, JEM.” They flew into the room, Jem holding a startled Mina.

And Kit just pointed at his hand. “Look!”

Chapter Text

February-May 2015

As he entered the shadowy training room, Kit could hear the thwack, thwack, thwack of knives being thrown. He was surprised to see it was Tessa, rather than Jem, at the far end of the old ballroom. Her long hair was caught up in a braid, its tail swinging as she leaned forward, catching the early morning light as it streamed through the high windows.

She half-turned as he came up behind her and in her hand he could see a small bo-shuriken being offered to him.

He shook his head. “No, keep going. Jem said you have an instinct for always finding your target- which I don’t. I’ll watch and see if I can pick anything up,” he said. He could acknowledge his weaknesses. Mostly.

Tessa flashed him a smile, and turned back, intent on her task.

Kit leaned against the wall watching Tessa as she finished, each remaining knife finding its way towards the centre of the targets. When he had first arrived to live with them, Tessa had been pregnant and then the first year after Mina had been born she had had enough to keep her busy. But once Mina grew older, every once in a while Tessa joined in on a training session with Kit. The first time she had absolutely demolished the obstacle course Jem had set up for him, Kit had remembered Tessa was not just a warlock- but she also had Shadowhunter blood from her mother.

“Respect.” Kit had whistled, eyeing the knife in the middle of the dummy demon’s forehead.

“I’m more than just an amazing warlock, mother and bookworm,” she had said, giving him a confident wink. Jem had come up behind her to give her kisses on her cheek, murmuring that she had forgotten talented and beautiful and other endearments. Tessa had let out a delighted laugh and Kit remembered the sheer happiness radiating from them.

He had wondered if he would ever find that kind of love.

This morning, Tessa seemed to sense his melancholy. Once she ran out of knives, she walked over to the raised platform and sat down, patting the spot beside her. Kit came over to sit beside her and she slipped a hand behind his waist, pulling him into a comforting hug. Once upon a time, this type of casual affection would have had him as skittish as Church but now, Kit just lay his head down on her shoulder and sighed.

She didn’t say anything, just waited for him. Kit looked down at his arms, the fading black marks and the whitening scars from older runes, and one - the Talent rune - which still glowed an eerie gold colour. He thought for a moment and slowly the golden light began to pool in his left palm.

Tessa watched the light grow and then fade away as Kit let out a frustrated noise. “That’s more control than yesterday,” she observed. It had been three days and Kit had been spending almost every waking hour not at college trying to get his magic to ‘turn on’ at will. So far it had been sporadic.

“Yeah, but I still have no idea what triggers it,” Kit said, straightening up and turning his hands over, as if searching for clues.

“I think I might,” Tessa said slowly. “I think we’ve been approaching your magic in the wrong manner. Warlock magic, it’s- a magic of distance, intellectual and esoteric. With Shadowhunter runes- the rituals of the Silent Brothers, the Iron Sisters - it’s based on devotion, a higher call to duty and heavenly grace. But Fae magic... it’s a magic that is based on life, of all things living and dying. I think it's driven by emotions.”

“Hmm,” Kit said. It made sense but also, kind of difficult to put into practice. He was in tune with his emotions, wasn’t he? “Okay sure but how do I use that?”

Tessa slipped her arm out from around him, and took out a bo-shuriken. Concentrating, she drew the sharp end of the blade across her palm, and immediately, a bloody line appeared.

Kit stood up in alarm. “Wait, Tessa, what are you doing?” He could feel a pulse of power shoot through his arm and an answering warm glow build in his own palm.

“It’s okay, Kit,” she soothed and reached out, her grip iron-strong on his arm. He allowed her to draw it up and hold it hovering over her own palm, the blood now a gathering pool, about to drip onto the ground.

“I’m not in immediate danger,” she told him, her eyes serious. He could tell she knew he was unhappy about this turn of events. “And I can heal this easily with my own magic at any point.” She gestured with her free hand. “But I want you to try and heal it. I want you - to think - no, to consciously feel what you’re doing- try to understand how and why you’re healing me. What that feels like.”

Kit breathed out and nodded, trying to tease out the swirl of emotions and magic building in his chest. Tessa let go of his hand and he held it above hers, the golden glow steady. He concentrated on Tessa and his thoughts- no, his feelings about her. How he was upset at being put on the spot but also feeling shy pride in how much she trusted him. How he was worried about the injury - it looked deeper than he initially thought. How he hated to see her hurt and how much- how much he loved her and wanted to fix it, however he could.

Unlike the pulse when Ellie had been hurt, this time his magic curled out, almost like a cat’s paw and caressed Tessa’s palm. As it cleared away, he could see the cut already healed into a faded scar, barely visible.

Tessa nodded, as he dropped his hand to his side. “It should get easier in time. But I think you’ll have to be deliberate about your intentions and feelings for the time being, if you want to have any sort of control around it. We can practice that, if you like.”

Kit looked down at Tessa, her face impossibly youthful but her eyes watchful and deep with the wisdom that came only from a lifetime and more of experience. He thought about the fact that she had lived several lifetimes already.

He nodded. “Sounds good.” He stepped away, and looked down at his hands again. While the rune was still glowing, there was nothing else to indicate his powers- his were again ordinary human- or more accurately, Shadowhunter hands.

“Do you want Mina to be a warlock? Or a Shadowhunter?” Kit asked suddenly.

Tessa looked unsure about the turn of conversation. “I… it’s not really about what I want. It will likely be up to Mina.”

“When did your other- when did James and Lucie choose?” Kit asked, curious. He thought back to his abilities and how they seemed to not only be tied to his emotions but also tied to his runes- specifically the Talent rune. “Did they choose, or were they kind of forced to be Shadowhunters?”

A flash of sadness passed over Tessa’s face and Kit felt like he had intruded on private grief. He had never really asked about the long-dead Herondales but Jem and Tessa had brought them up often enough- but only ever happy memories to share with him and Mina.

“It was a different time,” Tessa said slowly. “The Clave- and Shadowhunter society were barely accepting of anyone who was even slightly different.”

“As opposed to now, when they’ve been so open and accepting,” Kit said and she gave the look that he knew meant he was being a smartass.

“If I had a chance to go back and do it again- despite the potential unwanted attention it might have put on them, I would ensure James and Lucie were able to understand and hopefully control the additional abilities they inherited from me,” Tessa said. “I thought when their first runes held on their skin, that was it- they were Shadowhunters, they could choose to turn away from the darker aspect of our family’s history. But it followed them anyway, and I…”

She took a deep breath. “I failed them. I don’t want to repeat that- so I will teach Mina to embrace both her heritages. The choice will ultimately be hers- although I am hoping she might not have to choose. You’re showing it’s possible to do both,” she said, giving him a look he couldn't quite read.

She sighed and slipped her hands into her lap, clutching them. “I wanted- want my children to be happy,” Tessa said. “James, Lucie... you and Mina. But sometimes the need to protect overrides that happiness.” She looked at Kit directly and Kit knew without asking that she was now questioning their previous interaction. Whether she had pushed him too far.

He leaned forward and gave her a quick hug. “I’m okay- but please don’t constantly cut yourself if we’re going to practice. Jem gets funny about bloodstains on the training room floor- says they’re a trip hazard.”

Tessa smiled. “I promise. I’m going to go down and start making breakfast. You coming?”

“No.” He wanted to practice a few things. Tessa had given him some ideas. But as she began to leave- Kit realised something. “Tessa- when I go to New York-,” he began. He hadn’t wanted to ask before but now he needed to know.

Tessa looked back, and shook her head if she knew his thoughts. “Kit,” she said gently. “You always have a home here in Cirenworth with us. Always.”

And Kit believed her.

*

Kit,

I should start off this letter by saying I should have sent it a few months ago. When I came back to the Institute and you weren’t there I thought maybe you’d send a text or call. But then I realized you had moved to a new country and would have had to get a new phone and maybe you didn’t have my number. And then I also remembered that I also had a new number because I had thrown my phone in the ocean after I needed to get rid of the evidence.

So I left a message for you at the London Institute with Bridget and she said she’d send it to your house in Devon.

I thought you’d reply. But now I’m thinking she never sent the letter. I guess I can’t blame her- she is over 150 years old and she probably forgot. Or maybe you did get it and you’ve chosen not to reply.

But then Livvy convinced me that it was worth re-writing this letter. Just in case. And when I was home at Christmas, Mark said something about how you had asked about me.

So I thought, maybe you’re no longer upset at me. I’m not mad at you. But I do have a lot of questions and I think we need to talk again about what happened at Lake Lyn. I hope we can do so soon.

Sincerely,
Ty

P.S. I know that I could have sent a fire message but my mom always said that the most sincere messages are those that are handwritten and so I thought that you’d appreciate the gesture.

“Who signs their ‘let’s get back together’ letter with sincerely?” Ellie asked, her eyes rescanning the letter, her lips moving over the words.

Kit resisted the urge to snatch the letter back. To distract himself, he took a big sip of his coffee, leaning back on the coffee shop's wooden chair. “We were never together- and it’s not a ‘let’s get back together’ letter at all. It’s just… polite.”

“It is oddly formal for a teenage boy,” Ellie agreed. And Kit realised what he hadn’t told her about Ty.

“Oh- no, that’s just Ty,” he said quickly. “He’s- different from the other Shadowhunters.”

Ellie raised her eyebrows. “Different how?”

“Different as in- if he were a mundane, I think he’d be on the spectrum. Like- he’s brilliant and-” Kit said, starting to already defend him.

Ellie let out a small giggle. “Whoa- calm down, I was just asking,” she said. But her eyes softened. “He sounds really cool.” She turned her attention back to the letter and then frowned. “But I can’t believe you don’t have a photo of him. Are you sure we can’t stalk him on Facebook? Snapchat? Instagram?”

“Ah, no- believe me I’ve already tried. I guess the special warrior academy in Romania doesn’t have internet.”

“Okay but tell me- he’s hot, right?” Ellie said.

Kit thought back to his brief encounter with Ty in London - and to before, even back to their very first meeting when he had thought Ty was the most beautiful boy he had ever seen. He still was. Kit tried to play it cool but was acutely aware of Ellie watching him with delight. He nodded tersely.

“Ooh, you still have it bad,” she said. “Tell me again why it all went so wrong?”

Kit paused. He had briefly filled her in on some details but wasn’t about to tell her about the necromancy attempt or its aftermath. “I uh- it’s complicated. But let’s just say that I tried to tell him how I felt and he just… brushed it off. Like I was nothing.”

Ellie pursed her lips. “Oookay, I see. Did he not-” she stopped, and tapped the letter on the table between them. “Wait… how soon was this after his twin sister died?” Kit had told her at least that much about Livvy.

“Umm,” Kit said. He was beginning to regret the decision to let Ellie see the letter.

“How soon?” Ellie asked, her eyes narrowing at Kit’s hesitation.

“… a few weeks,” he said.

Ellie sat back in her chair, and gave him a look. She muttered something that sounded like ‘clueless, emotionally stunted boys.’ And Kit squirmed but to be honest, he had also started to question some things about that time, so this wasn’t even the worst thing he had thought about himself.

“Right- moving on,” Ellie said, seemingly taking pity on him. “That’s in the past- you’re going to write him back, right?” She handed the letter back to him and he tucked it away.

“Yes,” Kit said. “But let’s remember- he probably just wants to be my friend, not anything more.” He checked the time on his phone. “But I can’t talk about this now- I have to head to my therapy session. Time to get a grilling of a different kind.”

Ellie reached over and patted his head. He swatted her away, as he stood up. “Proud of you!” she said.

“Yeah, yeah,” he grumbled. Kit’s third winter in Devon hadn’t been as bad as the previous two, but his mood had still slumped. His motivation had taken a nose-dive on most of his college-related activities and he mostly chose to spend his limited energy on getting a handle on his Faerie abilities and Shadowhunter training. Ade and Ellie had noticed, and rather than have any sympathy, in a moment of weakness they had managed to get him to sign up to the college’s free counselling service. It was alright, Kit admitted. The woman running it was kind and she didn’t force him to talk about anything he didn’t want to - which was a lot of subjects.

He suddenly realised Ellie was still talking “So- depending on how things go… you’re going to have to figure out where you stand with Eamonn,” she said.

“Okay sure, I will,” Kit promised. He started walking away before Ellie could offer any more ‘advice.’ “Oh- also, what did Ty mean when he said ‘had to get rid of the evidence?’” Kit put on another burst of speed. “KIT!”

*

With only minimal input from Ellie - Kit asked Ade to take her out to a film and dinner - he finished the return letter to Ty. He agonised over what to write.

Ty,

I didn’t get your original letter so I’m glad you wrote it again. No, I’m not mad at you anymore. We do need to talk but I don’t know when we’ll get a chance in person, given you’re still at the Scholomance (I assume) and I’m here in Devon. Maybe we can talk on the phone? Or text. In any case - here’s my new number-

Kit paused after he wrote down his number. How was he supposed to end the letter?

I’ve missed you.

He crossed that out.

Yours,

He crossed that out too.

Sincerely,
Kit

He hurriedly went to buy a stamp and posted it before he lost his nerve.

*

In addition to his final A-Level exams in May, Kit also discovered that he’d have basically the equivalent for Shadowhunting - there would be an assessor sent out to test his skills.

“In order to be a full member of the Clave...” Kit read the letter, the first part addressed him, the second to Jem. “Why do I care about being part of a bigoted council of- I mean, great,” he said hastily. If it meant he could go to New York and go on patrols... In the corner of his eye, he could see Jem smother a smile.

“So, who is my assessor?” Kit bounced from foot to foot, craning his neck to see the rest of the fire message. Jem ignored him and finished reading it before handing it to him.

Kit scanned the message. “Isabelle Lightwood?” He thought back to the New York Institute’s training room in December and her dark eyes watching him. While she had been around for the training, she had usually let Beatriz lead it.

Jem watched him. “Yes- is there a problem with Isabelle? She frequently does them for other American Institutes, and it’s not unusual that she might come to England to do yours.”

Kit hoped she wouldn’t hold the fact that he had nearly impaled her against him.

“Nope, that’s great,” he said. He read the last part. “Not until the end of March though.”

“It’s usually about a month before your 18th birthday,” Jem told him.

“I wonder if the test has changed a lot in 150 years,” Kit asked. “Can you give me any tips?”

There was a wistful look on Jem’s face.

“I never had one,” he said.

Kit paused but Jem shook his head. “But I’ll look forward to celebrating yours when you pass.”

“If I pass,” Kit said.

“When,” Jem replied firmly.

*

“You seem distracted,” Eamonn told him and he pulled away from Kit.

They were at Eamonn’s house, and Kit had carefully angled Eamonn away from the flat, staring eyes of the pro-footballers who adorned almost every surface of Eamonn’s small bedroom.

Kit sighed and sat up, allowing his shirt to fall back down. He had been enjoying Eamonn’s attention but he admitted it had been a distracted appreciation. “Sorry.”

“You stressed about exams, uni applications?” Eamonn asked, offering Kit a sideways glance.

Kit shrugged. “Nah, not really? I just have a lot on my mind.” On his upcoming Shadowhunter assessment, on the fact that he still hadn’t heard back from Ty, even though it was nearly a month later. He turned the question back to Eamonn. “You?”

Eamonn stretched back onto his pillow. “No, me either- I’ve decided on a gap year rather than uni in September, so I’m not even stressed about exams now. I have Exeter on conditional but I’ve deferred, so even if I don’t get the grades, I could always resit or re-apply.”

“Oh, right,” Kit said. There was an awkward silence and he could see Eamonn looking at him curiously. “Yeah- I uh, am planning on a gap year too.”

He suddenly thought back to what Ellie said, and his situation and Ty and… he needed to come clean to Eamonn. He didn’t want to lie to him, even if he didn’t know what the thing with Ty was, or even if it was going to be a thing. Which it probably wasn’t.

“Look Eamonn…” Kit began. He stopped.

Eamonn scrunched up his face, and he shoved himself off the bed. He stood, and Kit felt like he should stand too. So he did. “What are we doing?” he asked Eamonn, confused.

“I just didn’t want to be sitting on my bed when you broke up with me,” Eamonn said, a bit defensively.

“Oh,” Kit said inanely. “I mean- like, I don’t know if we have to break up, or stop doing this but there’s been- someone from my life who’s come back into it and I’m kind of-” He trailed off. No, he just had to say it. “So we should probably stop. I just don’t think it’s fair to you. I’m really sorry.”

He stopped, watching Eamonn’s face carefully. The other boy looked upset and Kit bit the top of his lip, worrying it with anxiety.

“Ugh, stop that,” Eamonn said. “Stop being so… nice and hot, Kit.” He returned to the bed, sighing. Kit followed him back but didn’t sit down again.

“So… I’ll just go?” he said, hovering.

“I guess so,” Eamonn said, after a minute.

Kit thought he should leave. But he wasn’t sure he wanted to yet. “I mean- I’m not actually seeing him yet, so I guess we could- if you uh, wanted, one more time?”

Eamonn’s gaze was on Kit’s face, as if trying to figure him out. “Yeah- all right,” he said, finally, still looking a bit miserable but a bit brighter. He held out his hand, and Kit allowed himself to be pulled down. “As long as I can have your full attention.”

Kit held himself up onto his elbows and looked directly into Eamonn’s big, hazel eyes. He pushed his thoughts about Ty to the back of his mind. “Absolutely,” he said.

*

“So… Mrs. McDonald is absolutely mental- there’s no way we have enough b-roll to finish that second edit before the end of the week...” Kit complained as he and Ellie filed out of the Film Studies editing suite. Ellie nodded distractedly. She was looking at her phone and Kit caught a flash of familiar words - UCAS and he hurriedly looked away to give her privacy.

Over the past month, he had been privy to the secondhand stress that came from getting the dreaded ‘A decision has been made on your UCAS application’ email. Kit didn’t know why the universities then drew out the torture by making prospective students then log in to the website to find out the decision.

A few days ago, he had been tackled by a jubilant Ade who had waved his phone in front of Kit’s face. “London calling, mate! I got the Kings’ offer- it’s conditional on A*AA but you know what- if I can handle a fucking demon attack, I can fucking do this,” he had said, his body leaning on Kit, slack with relief and joy. And Kit had hugged him back, laughing with him and offering jokingly for Ade to come out on another patrol with him and Jem the night before exam period started.

But Kit could see almost immediately that Ellie’s was a different outcome and he grew worried- he knew she had already had a few other rejections from other drama schools earlier in the month. Her colour high, he watched as she tapped and scrolled down and read the message quickly. Her normally expressive face was a blank slate as she clicked off her phone, and started walking away without speaking.

“Wait-” Kit put on a burst of speed and caught up to her. “El- what is it?”

She shook her head and he followed her as she plowed through the crowded halls, not bothering to pull on her jacket as they exited the front doors of the college.

The March wind whipped around them as she marched grimly over to her car. “I just- go back, Kit. I’m okay- I just need to-” she began but then stopped short and leaned her head against the driver’s side window and sighed. “Fuck my life.” Kit could immediately see the problem. Her car keys were winking on the seat behind the locked doors.

Ellie’s eyes filled with tears, and Kit jumped into action. He hadn’t driven into Totnes that morning, (unsurprisingly, he didn’t have as many car privileges as previously) but he did have something almost as useful in his wallet.

He gently moved her aside and bent down and began to pick the lock. Similar to his pickpocketing skills, he had had fewer opportunities to use them since coming to Devon. But he had often found it relaxing to work on a couple of old locks while he watched youtube videos and Mina being a curious toddler, he had had more practice recently as she had insisted on hiding in old rooms of Cirenworth, which sometimes had sticky doors.

Ellie watched in silence until he popped the lock and opened the door. Kit swept a bow. “My lady- your carriage awaits.”

She gave him an assessing look as she sat down. Kit moved around to the passenger seat side and she didn’t ask him to leave. “Is that another Shadowhunter skill?” she asked, nodding as he tucked away the small cloth holding his lock-picking tools.

He shook his head. “No- this is from my previous life of crime,” he said lightly. Thanks to therapy, he had gotten better at opening up about his life before Shadowhunting to Ellie, so he knew she’d understand the reference.

She nodded and started the car. “I got rejected by RADA,” she said bluntly, after a few minutes of driving.

“Shit,” Kit said. He knew that was her top choice. “I’m really sorry.”

Ellie shrugged as they turned down the road towards her house. “Yeah, it sucks. Plus, after Falmouth’s rejection last week, I have one choice left- Bournemouth.” Her mouth twisted. “I’m not feeling confident.”

“There’s… always clearing?” Kit asked. He didn’t pretend to understand what clearing was and it sounded like a free-for-all hell but apparently it was how the English like to figure out their university cohorts.

Ellie let out a sigh. “Yeah, maybe.”

They pulled into her driveway and Kit followed Ellie into the house. No one else was home. “Do you want to call anyone- Ade? Your mum?” he asked.

Ellie shook her head. She flopped down on the living room sofa, tears starting to trickle down her face and Kit sat down beside her, trying to figure out how to best comfort her.

“Want to watch some trash tv?” he offered and passed her a tissue box. “Drag Race? Made in Chelsea? You choose- I won’t even ask you to put on the subtitles for Geordie Shore if that’s what you want to watch.”

She nodded and moved closer to him. Kit felt awkward for only a second before suddenly figuring out her cues. He lifted up his arm and she snuggled into him and he hugged her tightly. He carefully grabbed at the remote with his free hand, turning the tv on.

Later on, after their fifth episode of some hot people speaking in incomprehensible Northern accents, Ellie stirred and she poked Kit. “Hey- how old do you have to be to join your Shadowhunter Academy? Am I too old?”

Kit looked down at her, disconcerted. “I uh- don’t know. I think you have to be under 19?” He watched her carefully, wondering if this was a serious request. He both could and couldn’t imagine Ellie in the Shadow World. “Do you want me to ask?” He knew that Simon was a Recruiter for the Academy and was coming with Isabelle for Kit’s assessment at the end of the month.

Ellie considered the question, tugging on her pink hair. “Yeah. Yes, please.”

*

Kit looked at himself. He had put on gear already and he… wasn’t unhappy with what he could see in the mirror. Compared to even a year ago, he could see more muscle definition in his arms and his shoulders had broadened out, even if he wasn’t as tall as he had hoped he’d be. He looked a bit like Jace, he knew - the same curling blond hair, but his eyes were their own light blue that he shared with his long-lost Herondale ancestors. Above the dark gear, his face looked pale but resolute. He looked like a Shadowhunter. Even if he was also a bundle of nerves.

He eyed his stele lying on his bed, wondering if he should draw more marks - he had already covered his arms and torso with the more typical ones - agility, surestrike, balance, but he knew he had space on his calves...

There was a knock on the door. It was Jem. “Izzy has finished setting up in the training room and she’s ready-” Jem said but he paused as Kit opened the door fully and stepped out. Kit could see him take a quick breath. “By the Angel- Kit, you look...ready,” he finished.

“Time to face the music,” Kit said, smiling nervously as he edged past Jem and into the hallway. Downstairs he popped into the kitchen to quickly down some coffee, while Tessa passed him a plate of toast and eggs and ruffled his hair. Across the table with his own cup of coffee, Simon gave him a reassuring smile and cracked Star Wars jokes that helped Kit relax a little.

“Kit-” Mina was tugging on his knee. “Good yuck! Fight good,” she told him seriously and passed him her favourite teddy.

Despite arriving at a late hour the previous night, Izzy had insisted that they start the assessment early. “That way, we’ll have enough time for your friend to still have a chat with Simon, we can do some sightseeing and then all of us can go out for dinner later on,” she had said with a friendly smile.

Isabelle Lightwood as Alec’s sister and Jace’s friend was fine, Isabelle Lightwood as a training instructor was intimidating and Isabelle Lightwood as the assessor who would determine whether he was worthy to join the adult Shadowhunter ranks was terrifying, Kit thought as he made his way up to Cirenworth’s training room. She was one of the heroes of the Dark War, she had grown up and trained with Jace- what if she compared Kit to him? He knew he was better than when he had started training with Jem two years ago…

“Hey Kit,” Isabelle stifled a yawn, as he entered. She was also in gear and held her electrum whip in one hand. “So- how about we start with the boring paper stuff first and then move on to the interesting part- aka the fighting and then you can invite all the others in for your special weapon section - sound good?”

“Perfect, sounds great,” he said and suddenly he thought about the training and studying he had been doing with Tessa recently and his hours and hours of perfecting Shadowhunter skills with Jem… he could do this. He straightened up.

The next few hours were a blur but before he knew it, he was wiping drops of sweat out of his eyes and Izzy was standing in front of him, a pleased smile about her lips.

“Okay, so the last section is not really important in the overall scheme of things but the Clave added it because everyone knows us Shadowhunters like to show off… Do you have your special weapon or a special skill that you want the Clave to be aware of?” she said, and Kit noticed she had said ‘us Shadowhunters’ and his heart pounded harder, if that was even possible after the cardio workout he had given it by leaping, fighting and yes, even dropping from heights. But then he realised what time it was, and a grin began to form.

“Oh yeah, I have a special skill,” Kit said.

Simon, Tessa and Jem, holding Mina, all filed into the training room. A fourth figure also joined them, pink hair catching the light. Ellie. She looked over at him and her eyes widened, and then a big grin crossed her face and she gave Kit a big thumbs up.

Izzy stepped back and she nodded at Kit. “Go ahead.”

Kit leaped up onto the raised platform where he had set up numerous targets. He looked back, and he could see Jem and Tessa smiling up at him.

He took a deep breath, and settled allowing what he had basically termed his ‘Jedi mind state’ - allowing his emotions to flow through him, and he felt the corresponding Faerie magic rise and flow down his arms and into his palms. Golden-white light gathered into his palms and once it had reached a certain height and diameter, he turned back to the targets and carefully, he aimed. Blasts of light shot from his palms found their way to each of the five targets’ centres. After the last one, he was starting to feel lightheaded from the concentration and he let go of the magic, the light quickly fading.

While he originally had intended to finish with a somersault off the platform, he was feeling shaky enough that he simply hopped off and walked back to the small group.

“So,” he asked, resisting the urge to crack a ‘One with the Force, I am,’ joke and he couldn’t help but appreciate the shocked look that Izzy and Simon exchanged between them. “Did I pass?”

“Flying colours,” Izzy said quickly and behind her, he could hear Ellie whoop. Jem and Tessa were looking at him with such pride and happiness in their faces that he ducked his head in sudden shyness. Then they were all around and Kit basked in the glow of his success.

*

“How long does the talk usually take?” Kit asked, his eyes on the study that Simon and Ellie had disappeared into a while back. He bit into the giant apple fritter that Jem had picked up from the village bakery in celebration.

Izzy followed his gaze. “As long as it needs to,” she said but her look was understanding. “It’s not exactly an easy decision to make.”

“True,” Kit said, fiddling with the bakery bag.

Twenty minutes later, Ellie emerged. Kit was trying to read her face- he thought she looked happy if contemplative. Simon was relaxed and joking with her about something related to Lord of the Rings, which he thought was a good sign.

As he walked with her to the front door, she was uncharacteristically quiet and Kit didn’t want to press. “Ellie,” he started.

“Hmm?” she said and she was clearly lost in her own thoughts.

“What do you think?” he asked. “About the Academy?”

She hesitated and Kit wasn’t sure if he was relieved or disappointed. “I don’t know- I’m going to think about it, talk to my parents. The next intake isn’t until September anyway, Simon said. So I have time.” She looked up at him, her blue eyes serious. “What do you think?”

“I think you’d make a pretty badass Shadowhunter,” Kit said. “But- you’re also pretty badass on your own, just as you are.”

Ellie grinned. “Yeah, I am.” She gave him a quick hug. “I’ll text you later!” She gave him a look once more up and down. “You were pretty awesome yourself earlier, angel boy.” She winked and skipped out the door.

*

After Kit’s Shadowhunter assessment, the month April flew by in a state of contentment that he had never felt before, the only wrinkle being that Ty had still not sent back a reply to his letter. Kit tried not to feel too disappointed.

It was a quiet Saturday morning when it finally fell apart.

It was the week after Kit’s 18th birthday, and Kit was looking after Mina while Tessa and Jem had driven into Newton Abbot to do the weekly grocery shop.

They were in a room next to the conservatory that had been designated as Mina’s playroom. Mina was in front of her play kitchen, banging her tiny pots and pans as she prepared ‘tea’ for him. Kit was vaguely trying to revise for his English Literature exam, but wasn’t putting much effort into it.

“KIT!” A demanding Mina was suddenly in front of him, holding out a wooden teapot and cup. Kit took it, while also internally wincing at Mina’s loudness. Normally he didn’t mind but he was also slightly hungover from his previous night out at the pub with Ade, Ben and a bunch of other people from college who had already turned the legal drinking age. He pulled out his stele and surreptitiously drew an iratze on his left arm, and his headache started to dissipate.

He returned to his play with Mina. “Mmm, slurp slurp, tea! My favourite,” Kit said, pretending to drink. He held out the cup. “More?” Mina stared at him. “NO!” she said, her current favourite word. She whirled around and ran back to the kitchen, grabbing another teapot. “CWAFFEE.”

“Oh okay- yeah, I could totally go for some coffee,” Kit answered, also thinking that he could go for some of the real thing. His phone buzzed beside him, a message popping up and Kit leaned over to grab it. It was an unknown number- he clicked through to unlock to see the full message.

Suddenly, he was knocked sideways as an invisible shockwave slammed into him, while a giant gong sounded in his head. He could hear the tinkle of breaking glass echoing all around the house before it fell deathly quiet.

He didn’t know for sure but he would have bet a large sum of money that the wards Magnus and Tessa had set up around Cirenworth had just been breached.

Immediately, Kit’s thoughts turned to Mina and whether she had been hurt in the blast. She was curled up in a ball on the floor, a small whimper coming from her but the next second she was looking at him with questioning eyes. “Wat that?” she asked.

Adrenaline was coursing through Kit’s veins as he tried to figure out the next plan of action. He reached down to scoop up Mina and she giggled into his shoulder. “Shh, Mina- it’s a game, we have to be quiet,” Kit told her, as he opened the door, and peered out. “Like hide n’go see?” she asked.

“Yes,” he said. It looked like the coast was clear. “We have to be very quiet now while we go hide.” During the winter, Tessa and Jem had set up a Faerie-proofed panic room off the main staircase, its window-free walls covered in corrugated iron and its rowan door wreathed in dried leaves and branches of the same tree.

If he could only get to the room before whatever had breached the wards- he had to get Mina there…

Gritting his teeth, Kit started sprinting down the long hallway. He thought he could hear the murmur of voices coming from behind him, from the conservatory. He passed by the film room, and Tessa’s study without any interference. He paused to grab one of the ceremonial short swords off the wall beside the study and then quickly continued on, Mina still giggling in his ear, pleased at the game.

His luck ran out in the kitchen. As he entered, he skidded to the stop. The other side was filled with several tall men and women in dark green and blue uniforms, and even without looking at their ears, he knew they were Fae. But they didn’t seem to notice him and Kit suddenly remembered the additional warlock glamour he had on him. He began to inch out of the kitchen but then he heard a vaguely familiar voice say in a bored tone. “He’s here.”

Kit whirled around and about ten feet down the hallway he could see a brown-haired Shadowhunter dressed in shabby gear pointing at him. Beside him, a shaggy-maned man- no, warlock, was moving his hands in a complicated pattern and Kit felt a swift wind of magic swirl around him, and yanked. He was suddenly disoriented and he had to steady himself and Mina against the wall.

He could hear a clamour of voices behind him, and he cursed. Now the Fae could see him and Mina too. He looked at the sword in his hand, and realised that he had a much more potent weapon. He dropped the sword. As it clattered to the ground, he raised his hand at the oncoming group.

White-hot light erupted from his palm, punching a hole in the group and suddenly several of the Fae were no longer there. Kit ran towards the opening desperately, knowing it was a long shot. He had gotten them trapped between two groups of enemies.

Something caught at his ankle at the same time as a heavy weight thudded into the back of his head. The last thing he remembered before blacking out was trying to twist and protect Mina as he fell.

*

His first thought on slowly returning to consciousness was that the pain behind his eyes was too much. The second was that Mina was crying and screaming his name. He desperately blinked his eyes open and he briefly saw Mina’s scared face close to his, before she was swept up into the arms of one of the Faerie warriors.

He was suddenly hauled up to his feet roughly, his arms pulled behind his back and cold metal snapped around his wrists. Kit tried to steady his breathing and get his bearings.

It wasn’t possible with Mina screaming and reaching out for him. The Faerie warrior put his hand over her mouth and she promptly bit him. He yelled but didn’t drop her but shook her briefly and her frightened cry had Kit feeling an overwhelming sense of rage.

“STOP- don’t you dare hurt her! If you fucking do-” he yelled, violently aware of the situation but still straining against his captors. He kicked back and tried to headbutt whoever was holding him from behind. A slap across his head knocked him again into the wall and Kit slumped, his head ringing again. He saw the lion-maned warlock step up to where he and Mina were being held, and a spark of his magic flowed into her forehead and she collapsed like a rag doll.

“She’s sleeping,” the warlock said, his yellow eyes meeting Kit’s. “It’s for the best.” He pulled her out of the Faerie’s arms, holding her in his arms and he nodded as if to reassure Kit.

Kit was trying to think of a retort to that, when the Shadowhunter moved into his line of view. Kit recognised him finally - Manuel Villalobos, a Centurion and member of the Cohort. He had been Zara’s right hand man and had had some kind of alliance with the Unseelie Court.

Manuel gazed at him impassively. “Yeah, that’s the half-breed,” he said, meeting Kit’s gaze with a small sneer. “Christopher Herondale.”

Kit spat at him. It fell short but Manuel stepped back regardless. He looked around. “You’ve found yourself a comfortable setting to hide out in,” he said.

“How’s Idris been the last three years?” Kit challenged. “Have you resorted to eating your fellow Cohort members yet to survive?”

Manuel smiled coldly. “Oh- we have our own supply lines sorted now,” he said.

“This is the descendant?” One of the Faerie warriors stepped forward, her beautiful face moving close to Kit’s as she examined him. “He looks smaller than I would have thought.” Despite everything, Kit was especially stung by that - he wasn’t that short.

Manuel nodded again. “Yes, that’s him.”

A calculating look entered her face and she drew her bone dagger, stepping up to him. Kit tried not to flinch. This was it. He frantically tried to sort through his emotions in order to summon his powers again but he wasn’t sure he’d be in time, and he was still dizzy. I’m sorry Mina. Tessa. Jem. Ty.

She was stopped by another warrior, this one wearing a more elaborate sigil than the others. “No- the Queen wants him alive,” he said.

Kit blinked. He was being kidnapped by the Seelie Queen. Oh, this wasn’t good.

He continued to try and summon his power, and he could feel a warming glow rise in his manacled hands. Then, he felt a dagger graze his throat, and he was forced to look up. On the other side of the knife he could see Manuel shake his head warningly. “Any more glowy bullshit and we slit her throat,” he said, nodding at a sleeping Mina.

Kit felt another surge of hatred rise through him, and then a shot of horror filled him, as he realised his power had reacted. He frantically pushed it back down and he glared daggers at Manuel.

“You hurt her and you’re dead,” he told him, and Manuel laughed. “Like you can do anything about it,” he said mockingly, patting Kit’s head.

He looked over to the warlock. “Can you summon a Portal in here?”

“Better in the garden,” the warlock said.

“Let’s go then,” Manuel said, jerking his chin towards the back of the house.

*
Kit had tried to delay the trip through the house as long as he could, employing Mina’s favourite bedtime trick of ‘sandbagging’. But the Faerie warriors simply picked him up and manually moved him through the house. It was oddly humiliating. The Faerie party that had come to kidnap was also smaller than he had originally thought. Other than Manuel and the unnamed warlock, there were six of the Seelie Queen’s guards - now that he knew, Kit could recognise the sigil he had studied in his Faerie lore tutorials.

Kit frantically tried to think of clues he could leave for Tessa and Jem so they’d know where to follow them. He tried to grab at his phone but with his arms still trapped behind his back, he was unsuccessful. He looked over at Mina, and noticed that she had two bobby pins holding back her hair and Kit began to formulate a plan. If only he could grab them...

As they arrived in the garden, the Faeries dropped him on the ground and went to converse among themselves. Kit was still trying to figure out the plan when he noticed a small grey shadow creeping up behind the warlock, and his heart leapt in hope. Mina was in a little heap beside him, and Kit tried to move to cover her with his body.

Less than a minute later, a tornado of grey-ish blue magic came sweeping up, knocking the Faerie warriors over, scattering them to various parts of the garden. Kit could see Church leap and scratch at the warlock.

Manuel whipped around and suddenly a dagger blossomed in his chest, and then another in the centre of his forehead, his final expression frozen in shock and he slumped down as Jem stalked out of the cover of trees, his face filled with a cold, distant fury.

Kit could see Tessa out of the corner of her eye, her face a study of concentration and Kit could see the Faerie warriors suddenly grab at their throats, convulsing, as if they were drowning on land. One by one, they all slumped still, their faces a deathly grey-blue. Tessa began to run over to where Kit and Mina were.

A blast of Portal magic startled Kit, and he could see the warlock straining to keep open a small one, and he threw Church off him and dived through it. It closed with a pop and there was silence in the garden.

Tessa dropped on her knees where Mina was lying, her face in a familiar anguish that Kit had felt earlier. “She’s okay- she’s just sleeping.” Tessa nodded, her hands trembling as she drew her daughter to her. She held out a hand to Kit’s cheek, her expression not changing- the same fear on her face. Kit wanted to cry but he blinked back the tears. “I’m okay too,” he said.

He could feel Jem come behind him, helping him to his feet and then using his stele to unlock the Faerie manacles. He gathered Kit in his arms, quickly checking him for injuries and drawing iratzes. Kit clung to him, trying to steady his breathing.

Jem didn’t let him go but drew Tessa, cradling Mina in her arms, also into an embrace. They stayed like that for a few minutes, fallen Faerie warriors scattered around them like petals.

*

Kit raced around his room, grabbing the bare essentials. Tessa and Jem had given him five minutes and then they were going through a Portal to the New York Institute. As Tessa pointed out, they didn’t know if that had been an advance party.

Kit grabbed his stele from desk, feeling a pang of regret as he looked over his study books. The attack marked the end of his time in Devon, at least for the moment. Kit knew he couldn’t take the time now but when it was safe, he knew he’d have to send messages to his friends - to Ade and Ellie - explaining why he left.

His phone buzzed in his pocket and Kit pulled it out, as he headed down the narrow staircase. He unlocked his phone and he scrolled back to the original unknown number.

Kit, it’s Ty.

They’ve found you. We’ll be there soon - hide if you can. Prepare to fight if you can’t

From about two minutes before the attack.

Kit stared at the message.

“Kit!”

Tessa was calling him. He headed out to the garden, his emotions swirling around him.

His phone buzzed again and a new message popped up.

Ahead of him, he could see Tessa, her face drawn with effort, as she started to open up a Portal. Jem was holding Mina as she clutched her favourite giraffe. Tessa had been able to wake her up easily, and after a few minutes crying and clutching at Kit, she had calmed down when she had seen all the others were gone.

Stop.

It’s not safe in New York

How did he know?

“Wait,” Kit said. There was a shadow overhead and Kit’s frayed nerves snapped. Power built in him and he held his hands in a defensive position, ready, as two flying horses swooped down.

Kit stared. In front of him was Mark Blackthorn, dressed in Faerie garb and riding a white horse with flashing red eyes and golden hooves. Beside him on a similar black horse, in a Centurion’s uniform, was Ty, watching as a Kit lowered his arms.

“Stop. If you go through to New York, you’ll die as soon as you hit the pavement,” Ty said. “The Seelie Queen has also set a trap there.” Kit could see Jem and Tessa exchange startled glances.

Kit couldn’t help it. “Are you saying- come with us if you want to live?” he asked.

Ty’s grey eyes swept up to Kit’s face, his voice puzzled. “Yes,” he said, not understanding the reference.

“Okay then,” said Kit, fighting back a smile as Ty briefly met his eyes. “Let’s go.”

*