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It was early evening when Bedelia's ring bell made a sudden noise. As casually as she did everyday, she already had a glass of wine, her favorite kind, Bordeaux.
When she opened the door she saw a tall man with brown but slightly hoary hair, elegant clothes. His startled eyes met hers.
“Come in, Hannibal.” she said gently and opened the door further. “I apologize, I know it's too late.” he murmured as he took off his coat and hung it up. “I assume this is about Will.” she stated and took a sip from the wine in her hand. “Yes, I just have nobody to come to, but you.” he started off while they both took seats.
A few minutes passed, Bedelia refilled her glass of wine and turned around at the counter to look the man in the eyes. Those weak, frightened eyes. “What happened, Hannibal?” she asked, concerned of the way he acted.
“Have you ever wanted something so much for such a long time, when you finally got it, it didn't feel as good as you expected?” he asked carefully.
“Do you feel like he got there too late?”
“I feel like he never actually showed up.”
“Why do you feel that way?” Bedelia was confused, mostly because she was so sure about Hannibal being in love with Will, but now she wasn't as convinced as before.
“The 'us' I dreamed about for so long was all in my head and the 'us' we actually are isn't the way I imagined it to be.”
“It was all in your head?”
“I believe, I built up a memory of us being ourselves that never existed and whenever I try to add joy or happiness to the memory it all fades away.” he started to explain.
“I feel like I waited for so long, I forgot who he is and created someone who never existed and foolishly, I named him Will. Now that I have him, I know 'we' will never be the 'we' that I imagined us to be. Does that even make sense, Bedelia?” he finished desperately.
“It is possible, that the waiting was the best part and all you had and have after that is just longing pain.” she took a few more sips after a few second of silence.
“How would you describe your relationship with Will Graham?” she asked firmly.
“Stifling love. Fragile and sorrowful.”
“Don't you fear the future?”
“If I realize on the way of life that he's everything I want, can I put the pieces back together like nothing happened?”
“Even if you were a great surgeon, there's no possiblity of cutting out someone's heart and placing it back with no scars. Even if the organ will function, you give it blood, give it life again, it will still never beat the way it used to when you held it.”
“What would you do in my place?” he twisted his marriage ring on his finger.
“I would break someone's body and soul just to keep mine safe. Thus I am a selfish person and you do care about Will after all. I'm afraid there's no possible way for you to get away.”
Hannibal set there in quite when Bedelia took a seat in front of him.
“Or just leave, he already knows, Hannibal.” she looked down at the table, refusing the eye contact as shame started to form in her eyes.
“How do you know?” Hannibal asked with a harsh tone. “We talked yesterday. About you. He told me what he thinks of you.”
A few more seconds of silence passed by when Bedelia continued after Hannibal's despiteful glare.
“He told me what he sees in your eyes. That you don't look at him the way you used to. He sees the colors die away in your eyes. When you look at him, your eyes turn grey and he imagines your hands turning cold. He asked me where's his love.”
“Maybe it was all in his head too. Maybe his love doesn't exist in me. Maybe we will never be 'them'. The 'us' we wanted, it was all in our heads.”