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Chapter Text

"Child," Baghra said to her. "Aleksander is the Black Heretic!" 

Those words rushed over her leaving her cold. Her lips still tingled from where he had kissed her and she struggled to understand what was happening. If Aleksander was the Black Heretic then he lied about destroying the Fold. He lied about everything. Alina wanted to say she was lying, that she was an old woman and maybe she didn't understand. Baghra kept telling her to run and leave, but her feet refused to move. 

"If he is the Black Heretic then I want answers." 

She pushed past her and ignored her cries that she was making a mistake. Entering the War Room again, she soothed down her kefta and waited for his return. He came in not long after and his smile reached his eyes as if he almost expected her not to be there. She said she would be waiting for him. She watched every movement as he came towards her. He was so beautiful. She sometimes got breathless just looking at him. It seemed impossible that he was that ancient. Immortal. 

He held out his hand to lead her to his chambers and she followed wondering how she could just bring it up. She couldn't just say Baghra barged in screaming at her. Who knew what he would do to her if it was true? 

His fingers caressed her cheek and then he began undoing his kefta. She swallowed hard as he slid everything off. The kimono fell off him effortlessly until he was left in a white tank. So that was under everything. His muscles were strong and defined. His biceps flexed as he folded his attire on the vanity table. His shoulders were broader without all the layers and the reveal of his collarbones made heat flood through her. He was definitely seducing her. Using her. Manipulating her. 

Didn't he ask for consent? Why would he do that if he was just trying to make her want him so he could control her? He asked if she wanted this. She said yes. 

A part of her still wanted to say yes. 

This way she could turn around the tables and manipulate him. She could use this information to her advantage. He didn't know that she knew. If it was true then she could end his plan before it began. Whatever it was. 

She should confront him now before they sleep together. She should stop this. She didn't have to sleep with him. 

She really should stop...

But the pull to him had never been this strong. Her attraction to him flared like her powers as soon as he circled his hands around her wrist to pull her to him. She collided with his chest and gasped as he stroked a hand down her cheek. 

"What did Ivan want?" She asked. 

"Nothing to concern yourself with. It's all taken care of." 

Could she trust him? 

She shivered and felt the power between them surge. He said he would be right by her side. What did that mean? The Stag. Maybe the Stag was the answer. He wanted her to have an Amplifier. What would he need her for if he didn't want to destroy the Fold? Did he seek to control it? To what end? 

All these questions raced through her mind. She couldn't be naive. She had to figure this out. She moaned involuntarily when his lips brushed against her throat. He found places of pleasure she didn't even know existed. Her body swayed to him. It was like she had no control over it. He had complete control over her. She couldn't allow that to happen. 

Aleksander , she almost spoke out loud. 

She wondered if that was his real name. 

She pulled at his white tank and pushed him towards the bed. He was surprised by her forwardness, but didn't protest as she asked him to sit there at the edge of the bed while she undid her kefta. His eyes tracked every movement she made. The darkness seemed to swallow her up and she knew with each article of clothing she let slip from her body that he was overwhelmed by her, too.  His mouth parted, his hands flexing at his sides. 

He longed to touch her. Her body was bare for him now. She had taken off everything. She should feel vulnerable in her nakedness before this powerful man. Instead she felt victorious. He looked at him like he was battling inner demons. His lust swarmed like his shadows around her. There was something else there. She could almost taste the metallic of it with her tongue. There was an anger that consumed him. His nostrils flared. 

"I want you," he confessed. "I want more of you each time. Each kiss, each touch brings me closer to the impossible conclusion that I need you. I brought you here because I couldn't breathe until I had kissed you. I need you still. I feel unsatisfied. I feel...Alina, let me touch you. Please." 

She was his undoing. Whatever this man was, in this moment he was just a man. A man with desires so human and primal. 

He could be a monster. He could be a tyrant. He could destroy everything she loved. 

Here he was just Aleksander. Her Aleksander. 

She nodded. His breath hitched and motioned with his eyes for her to come closer. She stepped towards him - half fearful, half brave. His finger landed on her arm first. He followed the outline until it reached her collarbone. Heat followed in the wake of his touch and the effects of her own desires were difficult to ignore. Slick gathered between her legs. She could feel it when she pressed her thighs together. Next his palm glided along her stomach towards her hips. Her breathing quickened as he moved further down. 

" Alina ," his voice was deeper, hoarse and smokey that gathered even more wetness to her area. 

His index finger dipped between her silken folds and she gasped. A smile formed on his lips and he ran the pad of his thumb up and down. He brushed the spot of nerves there and bucked into him. She was so wound up, practically aching. Her cunt throbbed and she reached for his shoulders to balance herself. He circled her clit once, twice, three times before drawing back completely. She whined on impulse. 

"I didn't know you'd be so needy," he said, amusement dripping off his words. "Then again, I know the way you kissed me. You kept clinging onto me like you were afraid I was going to stop. Do you want to stop?" 

His index finger appeared again and it dragged through the slick and hovered at her entrance. She bit back a moan. There was no way she could stop now. She had to see this through. The other part of her - the better part - told her that she was using him. She was going to use his feelings for her to stop him before he ruined them all. This was to tie him to her somehow. She could tell how she affected him and he needed her. He couldn't fulfil his plan without her that much was certain. 

This was pure strategy, she told herself. Nothing more. 

He brought his finger inside of her. She broke open like a dam too full and burst. He kept his finger unmoving like he was only meaning to keep it warm. The pressure of him just there made her clench and he was expertly placed just there, brushing against a place she had only heard about in tent camps with hushed voices. She knew there was something there that could give a woman intense pleasure, but no one had ever touched her there. The few fumbles were nothing compared to this. 

"You're waiting for it, aren't you?" He coaxed with a beautiful enchanting look in his eyes. She lost her breath as he spoke. "It's almost painful. To be have me here, but it's nearly enough. That's what you do to me every time. You're here, but you still feel so far away." 

"I'm here," she breathed. "I'm here with you." 

She was. She could have convinced herself to leave, heed Baghra's words and fled the Little Palace. She would be leaving on a carriage right now far away from the Black Heretic. She stared into his eyes, the pupils blending into the dark of his irises. It was strange to think this man was the reason for all the pain the country went through. Every war, all the politics and deaths. Her parents' deaths. A grasp for knowing why took hold of her. What man used merzost to create The Fold? 

Why? 

"Yes," he concluded, his finger pressing in deeper still. "You're here." 

He curled his fingers ever so slightly and her body ignited like a live wire. He pumped his fingers in and out of her, massaging the spot that made her moan. His thumb circled around her clit with precision and expert movements. Her back arched as the pleasure crested. Her thighs trembled so hard he had to hold her hips steady to keep her from falling over. 

"Alek--" his name disappeared and turned into a cry. Something deep inside of her cracked open, it pulsed and exploded within her. Her vision blurred and washed with white. Languid heat laced her veins and she trembled in his grasp, slowly coming down. 

She's never come like that before. She doubted she had come ever since what she did by herself didn't even feel like this. It was explosive. Blinding light beamed through her veins as if her sunlight was filtering through every pore.

"That's it. Good girl." 

His praise made her heart flutter and she forced the feelings down. 

She laid down on the bed as he undid his pants and kicked it to the side. The way he was looking at her now. Lust and desire. Almost a visceral eagerness that he fought to keep contained. His hands hooked at her ankles and yanked her forward. He kissed the arch of her foot and then held her legs open by her knees. She felt flayed. Exposed. Her heart was hammering and the effects of being naked before him made her want to jump out of her skin. 

Oh . 

She stared down at his cock that nudged against her entrance. He was big, definitely too big. She was going to have to stretch open for him. His fingers weren't enough. Fear took hold of her and she almost scrambled away from him. 

"I've got you." 

His voice was soothing, coaxing. 

"I can't--" she protested. 

Shouldn't . 

He was the enemy. 

"I won't hurt you, Alina." 

Did he mean it? It was too late to turn back now. 

His eyes darkened as he slipped in just a little. He held her gaze, a deep unfurling need suffocated her. 

She wanted this. 

They both did. 

"The problem with wanting..." His voice was hoarse, thick with anguish she couldn't decipher, he pulled her legs apart even further and tilted her hips up, "...is that it makes us weak." He thrust in one fluid motion and pressed himself so deep she lost her breath. 

He was inside of her. She felt deliciously filled and pain bloomed at the edges of the pleasure wrecking her body. He hovered above her, his hair sticking to his forehead, a strand curling on his cheek. His eyes were bottomless pits gazing into her. She shut her eyes and turned her head away. He was pressed to the hilt with sharp, precise movements and then dragged himself back out until the tip caught on her fluttering opening. Her fingers clenched into the sheets, scrambling for some control. He was drawing sounds out of her that sounded foreign in her ears. It honestly didn't even sound human. 

"Look at me," he demanded and when she didn't move, he grabbed her chin and forced her. "Look at me, Alina. I want you to see what you do to me. What kind of man you make me." 

A monster , she concluded. He was a monster. 

There was this unyielding power that took over him. He kept her on the precipice of her climax until she was aching and sobbing. She wouldn't beg him. She refused. But this. It was everything she never knew she wanted. He knew where to touch and how much she could take. She felt her skin come alive and her body awaken. 

"So responsive to me," he murmured on a particular good thrust that hit that place inside of her. She nearly screamed. 

"I should send you back to your otkazat'sya like this. Cunt dripping my seed. My bruises on your skin. He should know who you belong to, who you truly desire. You're mine, Alina. Tell me. Tell you'd let me fuck you in front of him while you scream my name. I'll make him watch. Keep him tied by my shadows to a chair while you're begging for my cock. Tell me you'd want that and I'll let you come." 

Alina whined at the flirty words. 

Saints, he was beautiful like this. 

His neck was flushed red, the beautiful arch of it as he threw his head back. She wanted to press a kiss to the juncture of his throat or suck on it until it bruised black. She wanted to bite his skin until she left marks. She wanted to belong to him. She wanted him to make her his. A guttural groan sounded and her body quivered at the feel of it vibrating through her body. He was close. She wanted to feel him fill her up, to know what it felt like to have his hot seed running out of her. His breaths quickened and he panted hard. 

More groans spilled out until his mouth opened and his brows furrowed as the pleasure took over him. The moan he gave was one that took her over the edge. It was deep and sounded almost in pain. She did that to him. She brought him to this point. He came hard, slamming into her. She followed through her climax and clenched around his cock. His hair was messy, tendrils falling into his face. She curled her fingers around his soft hair. She tugged him to her mouth and he kissed her so thoroughly she lost her breath. 

"I know I will never get enough of you. Never tire of you. My bond to you will never fade. I've seen you for who you are and I cannot turn away. I never will. Can he say the same?" 

I know your soul at the making at the heart of the world. And there is no one more beautiful. 

"Who?" She was momentarily dazed. 

"Mal. Your precious tracker." 

Mal 

Her best friend. Her true north. He had abandoned her. She wasn't coming for her. She realised she didn't need him to come. She didn't need to be saved from this place. She didn't need his protection anymore. 

She shook her head. 

"Mal who?" 

Her lips sought his and then she brought his hand between her legs again. 

Chapter Text

Alina had almost forgotten about the ring on his finger. The ring that he used to break into her skin and reveal who she truly was -- a Grisha, a Sun Summoner. That was what started this. If she hadn't gone on that skiff that day none of this would have happened. She wouldn't be living in the Little Palace training with Baghra. She wouldn't be taking rides with General Kirigan...or Aleksander. And she certainly wouldn't be face down on said General's bed while that same ring glided along her dripping cunt. 

Her head was tilted to the side gasping for air. He had been playing with her well into the early hours of the morning. He let her rest for a bit, but now he was at it again. First light had broken through the spaces through his curtains and the first thing he did was kiss her lips. His voice was gruff in the morning as he told her to be good for him. 

She wanted to be good for him despite all that she knew. 

He was a liar. And yet so was she. 

She could have confronted him about it and known his side of the story. She desperately wanted to know his plans. The thought of him lying to her sank a heavy feeling into her stomach. If she told him she knew the truth would he spin a pretty story for her? 

It was easier for now to play innocent, she told herself again as his long fingers stretched her. She tried not to enjoy it. The scrape of the ring made it all the more enticing. His fingers pulled everything out of her and made her a moaning mess into the sheets. Her body was sheen with sweat, aching and taunt with the need to come. She was hanging on by a thread. 

"Only I can give you pleasure." His words had gotten lost in her daze. He kept talking to her, telling her how she was his and that she belonged only to him. 

She remembered what she said about Mal last night. Mal didn't even write her back. She honestly didn't need him anymore and that was the reason why she came to Aleksander. She had grown into herself and felt stronger than ever. Her powers were at the touch of her fingertips -- the light display she did at the Winter Fete was proof of that. The way he looked at her. Like she was everything he had been searching for. 

Her mind cast back to Baghra's words. 

Did you think this was all about you? 

That you were special? 

Stupid girl. 

She swallowed and focused on the pleasure rather than the pain that awakened on her chest. Either they both were lying or Aleksander really was using her. 

"Feel me inside of you, Alinochka , look how I make you feel. I wish I could stay here with you all day. Keep you warm with my cock, keep you filled with my fingers. You don't need anyone or anything else." 

She moaned for him. 

He was so good. This was probably how he used people, made them feel like it was only them and then broke them into pieces. 

"Speak my name," he commanded. 

"Aleksander," she cried. 

Saying Aleksander seemed to affect him more. She noticed every time she did his breath would hitch and his shoulders would ever so slightly lift as if he couldn't get enough oxygen. 

Was that his real name? If so, why did he give it to her? 

Her climax hit unexpectedly and she sobbed as it ignited her entire body in feverish heat. He collapsed next to her and tucked a curl of her hair behind her ear. 

"There is no one like us, Alina. And there never will be." 

She turned so she could meet his eyes and the sincerity struck her. Her throat clicked and she nodded. He sighed and swept a hand through his own hair, the strands messy in his face. He was entirely perfect to look at. She hated it. She eyed his naked chest that was littered with her marks and bites. She was glad for all the layers he wore. She was glad for her kefta being so high up to her neck no one would see the bruises he had placed on her skin. 

"Did you find the Stag?"  

Aleksander narrowed his eyes. 

"Someone claimed that they had found it. I have yet to know if they are right. We will leave today in search of it. My men are already preparing. I should get up." 

"Can I come with you?" 

"No, Alina. I don't think that's a good idea." 

"But I want to see it. It's my Stag, isn't it? I'm the one that dreamed about it. It's for me." 

"I know it is. The Stag was always meant for you." He cupped her cheek and then ran his fingers lightly over her collarbones. "I don't know how you're going to feel travelling with the Tracker." 

Alina furrowed her brows and moved away from him. 

"Mal is here?" 

"Yes, he was the one that found it. He seemed very determined to be the one to bring you it." 

The sharpness to his tone didn't go amiss. 

"I want to go!" She practically begged. She pulled him in for a kiss. He didn't move at first, but then he kissed her back. 

"As you wish," he said. 

The rest of the morning Aleksander was away from her. She itched to see Mal and tell him what she knew. Although she didn't need him anymore, maybe he could help? 

I can do this on my own. I can figure out his plans. I can do this. 

The voice in her head was strong and assured in her capabilities. The other part of her was not so sure. The way he had loved her, the things he had said as he was deep inside of her. 

We are alike 

You don't know how long I waited for you 

The way I want you, I can't quite understand it. . . 

I don't know what I would be without you 

He had pinned her hands down and fucked into her so hard she nearly passed out. 

She wanted to believe his words. She badly wanted him to not be all they said he was. Her heart was trying to make sense of it. He seemed to have genuine feelings for her. She had seen the way he gazed at her and what intensity had shone through him as he kissed her. 

She should use him. Take the Stag, force him to reveal himself. Their power was unmatched. Only she could do this. 

As she was getting dressed in her kefta and a black winter coat that she sure had once belonged to Alexander, Mal came into her room followed by Genya. 

"The General told me to bring him to you," said the red head. "He wanted to see you." 

She smiled when seeing him again. It was good to see his face. He pulled her into his chest. He smelt of sweat and blood. His face was still dirty from his travels. 

"Are you alright?" 

"Of course I'm alright," she replied. "Are you?" 

"General Kirigan said I must track The Stag. I don't want you to come with me. It could be dangerous" 

"It's not your decision, is it? Alek...General Kirigan said that I could. He wants me there. The Stag is for me. It's an Amplifier." 

"When I saw your drawings, I knew it had to be. I knew I had to bring it to you. What are you going to do once you have it?" 

"The bones. You wear it. It will help me expand my powers so I can destroy the Fold." 

Mal shifted from foot to foot. 

"Did you get my letters?" 

"What letters?" 

"I wrote to you every day!" 

"That's impossible. I didn't get anything." 

"Maybe he kept it from you," he whispered. "I don't trust him, Alina." 

"Right!" Genya clapped her hands. "Alina needs to finish getting done. You can leave now." 

Mal reluctantly left and Genya helped her throw on the thick heavy coat. His coat. His colours. She felt like she was owned by him and she wasn't sure if she liked it or not. 

"Be safe out there," said Genya. 

"Tell Marie and Nadia I will miss them." 

Genya paused. "Did you not hear? Marie was murdered last night. There was a bounty on your head and she took the fall. I was with her when she died." 

Aleksander didn't tell her that. All that time in his bed and he never once mentioned it. 

The team he brought with him was Ivan, his personal Heartrender, a few of his oprichniki and David, the Durast. Alina mounted her white horse, the black coat trailing down over the side of its body. Aleksander on his black stallion rode beside her. 

"How was your meeting with Mal?" 

"Fine. We didn't get to catch up much. Not that it matters." 

"It doesn't?" He raised his brow.

"Not anymore. It's different now. I'm different now." 

Her answer satisfied him and he smiled. 

"It won't be long now, Alina. You will get your Amplifier and then all the world will see what you can do. You and I will change the world and Ravka will be reunited." 

"A united Ravka. This will be good for everyone. I wonder what the King will do once Ravka is one country again. I've never concerned myself much with politics before, but it must be a massive change." 

His face changed as if the mention of the King was a knife as his side. 

"We shall see what happens with the King." 

Alina wondered if there was some kind of ominous intent on his part. Knowing what she knew now, she wouldn't put it past him. If he raised a coup on the King, did he intend to take over and rule Ravka himself? 

"Why didn't you tell me?" She spoke softly. The ache of loss pressing against her breastbone. "About Marie?" 

"I didn't want to upset you." 

"You should have told me." 

You should have told me lots of things 

"It was General Zlatan. He made a deal to assassinate you. If the Fold is destroyed, West Ravka cannot be independent." 

"What will you do about it? Zlatan?" 

"I will take care of it, Alina. No harm will come to you and nothing will stop us from creating peace in Ravka. We are the only ones that have the power to do it." 

She was surprised by his sudden openness. If she asked, maybe he would tell her about his other plans. She was sure that it had something to do with the King. She just had to get him alone. They rode together out of the Little Palace and into the Fjerdan woods. The air became colder, ice and snow halting the horses. They tied the horses to the bare trees and set up camp as the sun began to set. Aleksander's tent was the biggest. Mal was put in with the oprichniki. Ivan and David had their own private ones. 

Alina had no real choice as she laid on the roll out bed next to Aleksander. He said she was never leaving his side and that he would protect her. Light from the lanterns illuminated his body as he laid half naked. His lips were on her as soon as the tent flap was closed. She liked kissing him. His tongue evaded her mouth and little whimpers sounded as he toyed with her breasts. His expert fingers played with her nipples. 

"Aleksander," she sighed a little frustratedly, not sure if it meant stop or keep going. 

"I love it when you say my name." 

"Is that your real name?" She found herself asking. 

He paused his ministrations. He met her eyes and in them were thousands of secrets kept in the dark. 

"Yes. It is my true name. My first name."

First name 

He was immortal, she recalled. He must have had many names. He had given her his first. Surely that meant something. 

"Why?" 

"Why what?" 

"Why did you give it to me?" 

He sucked in a breath. 

"I wanted you to have it. That name was something that my mother used to say was tattooed on my heart. I am supposed to always keep it safe and never give it to just anyone. When I was a child, Grisha were hunted and not feared. My mother told me never to reveal who I truly was. I took another name. Other names. Too many to count. I gave you my name because I feel...human with you. I feel more myself than I have ever been. I told you I have been fighting this war for so long. I have. You wouldn't believe me if I told you. Grisha are still under threat from the Fjerdans and many other groups of people  who seek to kill us for who we are. I have to save everyone. But I cannot do it alone. You are the only one that can help me. You are my balance, Alina." 

They were two parts of the same coin. Equals. Shadow and Sun. They could be the turning point in this war. This was why he needed her. Her power and his could change everything. She didn't know what it all meant and what he was planning to do. He had told her some of the truth at least. She was thankful for that. All these questions remained in her head after she fell asleep.

Was he the villain or was he the saviour? 

Chapter Text

The night seemed to stretch forever. In sleep she was met with her darkest fears. Alone. She was wandering through the woods, the ice biting her skin. She was searching for something. A voice was echoing through the trees carried by the wind. Something pulled at her. An unfurling power lacing through her veins. 

It was the Stag. Or at least she thought it was. 

In dreams like this she always saw it. Now that she was close she was sure she would dream of it again. Instead the scenery changed and she was standing on the edge of the Fold. Screeches sounded around her and she felt like she had to listen. They called to her. Beckoned her. She didn't know why the volcra made her body shudder. The creatures with gruesome teeth and flesh-tearing claws seemed to yank at her very core. A strange surge broke within her and she reached out for them. 

Aleksander was now beside her staring at his creation. He turned to her with a smile on his face. 

"Look at it, Alina. It is ours. Like calls to like." 

She took his hand in hers. She wasn't afraid anymore. 

"It's beautiful." 

"What will happen after I take the bones?" 

Alina was nibbling on some fruit while she sat opposite Aleksander the following morning. It was early enough that the lanterns didn't need to be lit and the flap of the tent was open letting in a strong breeze. 

"You take the bones and then I have planned a demonstration in the Fold. You remember the people at the Winter Fete? Representatives will be on the skiff with us. We will travel through the Fold to Novokribirsk and there will show them what you can do." 

"Destroying the Fold?" 

He didn't answer. 

"Right? I will use the Amplifier and destroy the Fold?" 

Aleksander got up from his seat and came to stand beside her. He extended his hand so he could pull her up. He grasped her right hand to his chest. His eyes were storm clouds, determined and assertive. 

"Alina, I want you to know something." 

This was it. She held her breath. 

"Your power is rare. It is the only thing that can contain and control the Fold. The Fold has kept us fairly safe from attacks. It is our greatest weapon against people who seek to destroy us." 

"A weapon?" Alina pulled her hand back. "What are you saying?" 

"I need you to have the Stag. It is the only way." 

"What way?" Her voice turned cold like the air around her. 

"Alina, there are things you don't know…" 

"Try me." 

"Alina," he spoke again. He sounded almost exasperated. 

The weight of his secret must have weighed heavy on him all this time. The lying. The manipulation. Must be hard trying to be the saviour when he was literally the reason the Fold stood there in the first place. 

"Just tell me," she coaxed. She was willing to at least give him some kind of chance. 

"General!" Ivan called. "The Tracker has said the Stag is not far from the camp. We have to go now if we are to catch it." 

"Get everyone ready. Alina and I will be there shortly." He dismissed him with a wave. "Get dressed," he told her. "We will talk about this later." 

They trekked in the snow. Her feet sank into the icy ground and she felt her toes tingle from the cold. The wind whipped her hair in all directions. Mal was in front of everyone leading them deeper into the woods. Fear clutched her chest. She didn't actually know how she was supposed to get the bones. Would she cut the antlers off? She hadn't perfected The Cut so maybe that was why David was with? His Fabrikator powers might help her. 

She heard a sound in the distance. Almost like a voice, a soft sweet melody. Something pulled at her to run and she knew it was the Stag calling to her. She fought the urge to go to it as they came closer. She stopped in her tracks when the creature came into view. It was magnificent. The Stag was pure ivory and majestic as its antlers raised proud above its head. Alina was instantly comforted by the sight. This was exactly the same creature as she had seen in her dreams. 

"It's real," one of the oprichniki gasped. "Morozova's kin." 

She knew about the three Amplifiers created from the Bonesmith. It was hard to believe that this one had called to her. It looked her straight in the eye as if it had been waiting for her. She walked up to it on impulse, her powers igniting in her veins. She started to glow when her hand reached out and touched its head. She lit up brighter than when she held Aleksander's hand. She smiled. 

She knew that this creature beckoned her to have a part of it for herself. She was meant to have this. She knew it deep inside of herself. It was a gift. 

Before the Stag could bestow its gift upon her, she saw shadows fly through the air. Alina screamed when saw the manifestation of the Cut slicing the Stag. The creature slumped to the ground, its head rolling to the side of its body. 

Her breath came in heavy pants. She whirled around to see Aleksander with his hands still in the stance gesturing out to form the sign for the Cut. 

"You...you murderer!" She shouted at him. 

Aleksander righted himself. "This is how you get Amplifiers. You kill it and then take a part of it. It's always been done this way." 

"But that's not true. You didn't need to kill it. It was going to give it to me by it's own will. You killed it. The one who kills it has to use its power." 

"Not necessarily." 

"I don't understand." 

Aleksander ignored her. "Ivan, bring me its antlers. We will all go back to the camp now. Follow." 

Mal reached for her but she shrugged him off. All the way back she felt an intense hollowness in the chasms of her heart. The Stag died in vain. What was Aleksander doing? Surely, he didn't need an Amplifier. When they got back to the tent, Aleksander changed and told her to wear something more comfortable. It was a black dress, simple but pretty. 

"A little low cut, isn't it?" She snapped. 

"That's the point." 

David came in and Ivan stood guard.

"What is this?" She demanded. 

"I meant what I said. The Stag is meant for you. David, as you know, is a Fabrikator. He will meld the antlers into your skin." 

"What? No!" 

"This is the only way, Alina. The Amplifier needs to become a part of you." 

"But you killed it. It's yours. This doesn't make sense." 

"I will explain everything. David, if you will…" 

David awkwardly held the antlers in his hand and Alina reluctantly came forward so he could place it across her collarbones. She knew that if he had any chance at all, she needed to have all the power. This power was the only thing in this war she had to fight with. 

David's other hand clutched an object and he beckoned with his eyes to Aleksander. The General stared at it for a long time. He looked between it and Alina. Something flickered across his face. 

"Leave it," he said and David immediately dropped it. 

A light emanated from David's hands. The antlers broke into her skin and she had to keep herself from crying out. It was tearing into her flesh and bone, making a home for itself there. The first thing she felt was relief at the antlers being fused there. It felt right. It was supposed to be there. The second thing she felt was hatred. He did this to her. 

"How could you do this to me? This isn't what I wanted." 

"It needed to be done. It was necessary." 

"Necessary? Is that what you keep telling yourself? All of this that you're doing is necessary. Tell me, Aleksander, do you actually intend to destroy the Fold? I want the truth. You owe me that." 

He averted his eyes. "No. The Fold is too great of an asset. In the hands of us we can protect Grisha and help Ravka. Our enemies will be powerless against us." 

"Is that why you created it?" 

His head snapped to her, his gaze stone cold. "What did you say?" 

"You created the Fold. Centuries ago and now you're back to finish what you started." 

"Careful with your words, Alina." 

David gaped like a fish out of water. "You're...you're...you're the Darkling?"

Aleksander sighed. "That was the slur they used to call me. I'm sure you're more familiar with the term The Black Heretic." 

"So it is true. Why? Why did you create the Fold? I've heard so many stories about you. Hushed whispers as a child and curses put upon others in your name. Everyone talked about how you turned an army into volcra. Families and loved ones lost. Not just those who were turned, but others who got caught in the Fold. My parents! You are what is wrong in this world. Tell me why!" 

"Thank you, David. You may leave." 

Once David scurried away, she glared at him. 

"You are using me to gain control of the Fold. Baghra was right." 

He flinched at the mention of her name. 

"You knew." His voice was darker than she ever heard it. "You knew who I was and yet you let me touch you. You slept with me, not once or twice, but multiple times. What does that say about you, Alina? You were using me just the same. You wanted to get close to me. Is that it? Find out how to destroy me?" 

"I…" Alina had no real reason why she kept that a secret, only that she wanted it not to be true. Despite everything she felt for him. And using him was a part of her plan, but it was nothing compared to what he had done. "I needed to be certain." 

"Of what?" 

"Your feelings for me." 

He scoffed. "You are so naive." 

"So you were seducing me!" 

He stepped towards her and the bond between them broke open tenfold because of the Amplifier. Shadow and Light swirled around them as he gripped her tightly. 

"Do you not understand that if we don't stop the King or Zlatan, Grisha will die and it will be your fault? We need to do this together. If you want to help your country, you need me." 

She did want to help Ravka. But she couldn't bear to be part of this. Not by his terms. 

In the end she agreed to the demonstration. She would later decide what she would do. 

What makes a villain a villain? 

Morals were social concepts, laws that kept peace and safeguarded human rights. Morals were taught and passed down after many years of tradition. Killing people was wrong. Everyone knew that. It was something that at the very base of our human nature that we knew suffering was unjust. And yet ever since this world began people have gone to war and killed in their country's name. We did not curse those who fought -- we praised and congratulated. 

It was deemed a worthy cause. It was justified. 

When someone killed in a moralistic way, perhaps only killing who had done harm, we could somehow excuse it. Alina had been certain in her younger years that the greatest enemy was the Fold. It preyed on others and tore apart livelihoods and families. It was the war with it that she was fighting. Now after all the politics and talks of a free Ravka, she wasn't sure what was true. 

Using the Fold to protect Grisha. Killing those who harmed a race that had been slaughtered for centuries for merely existing. 

If you looked at it in that perspective, through the eyes of someone who sought to protect innocent people, who wanted a corrupt government to fall, then maybe they were right. 

In war, the only crime was to lose. 

People had the capacity to be everything. Each moment, every circumstance shaped a person. Good people could turn cold. Kind people could break someone down. Honest people could lie. There was no true black and white in this instance since human nature made it so we were changing constantly. You beat a dog down long enough it would go crazy. 

Alina couldn't help but think of the circumstances that had brought her here. She tried not to sympathise and understand what had to have happened in Aleksander's life that made him create the Fold. What laid in his heart that had caused him to seek merzost ? 

Was it a mistake? 

Alina stood looking in the mirror at the camp in Kribirsk on the border of the Unsea. Hot, angry tears threatened to fall. 

This is my Stag. Mine. 

Her fingers grazed the bones that were now melted into her skin. She was surprised that the sight didn't make her stomach churn with unease. No, that was not why she was crying. It was him. Aleksander who she knew had been the Black Heretic all along, but still managed to break his way into her heart. There was an ache so visceral and deep at his words when he told her what he truly planned the Fold for. Confusion settled within her. 

It made sense and she hated it. 

She was torn between using her power that solely belonged to her and destroying the Fold or listening to him and use it to their advantage. 

There was conflict inside of her. 

Darkness rose up to meet the light. 

"You look beautiful," Aleksander said from behind her. 

She scowled at him in the mirror. 

"You tricked me. You killed the Stag instead, but I still wear it like a trophy. It was my gift. You stole it from me." 

"Come now, Alina," he chided like she was a child. "You can't still be upset over its death." 

"It didn't have to die." 

"But it did. Now you have an Amplifier. It's what it was made for." 

"You put it like a collar on me," she whispered sharply, turning around to face him. "Like you own me." 

He sighed. "You know the only thing more powerful than the Fold? The two of us together. I did it for us." 

"No! You listen to me," she seethed. "You cannot control me. You will not exploit me. My power is not for you to do with what you will. I will choose. You will not make me." 

His eyes flashed with her defiance and the room grew darker. She took a step forward so that his knees hit the back of the bed in the middle of the tent. Light exploded from within her as her emotions flared like a sun beam, sparks flew across the tent and almost burned him. He stared at him in a mix of awe and anger. His nostrils flared and his mouth curled up in a grimace. Her hands came out towards him and she unconsciously let light stream from her fingertips. He fell onto the bed, sitting down on the mattress as she lunged for him. 

Her hands tightened around his throat. He didn't try to move or force her away. He allowed her. His eyes never left hers. 

"What do you want, Alina?" 

"I want you to stop acting like you're the only one that gets to make decisions. I know who you are. I know what you've done. You've tried for centuries to overthrow the monarchy. You have been planning this all along. I am another chess piece in your game. A pawn! But I will not let you determine my future. I am not something to be used." 

"Shall we propose an alliance?" 

"What makes you think I'll join you in your plot to kill the King and take over Ravka?" 

"Because I am the only one suited for the job. I am powerful and immortal. I know this country like the back of my hand. Too long I have watched our people fall prey to men like the King and Zlatan. They have controlled us for centuries! It's time we fight back and claim Ravka for our own. A world where Grisha are accepted and praised rather than feared and scorned. I have been fighting for this for most of my existence. I cannot do this without you, Alina. Together, we can bring a new order to Ravka. Make it our own. Join me." 

His proposal was tempting. After all, she wanted peace for Grisha and the people of Ravka too. She knew the monarchy was corrupt. She understood why he was doing this, but Aleksander didn't know when to stop. He would kill thousands of ordinary, innocent people if they posed a threat to his vision. He couldn't be contained. He would do anything for his goal of a better Ravka. He would even die for his cause and that made him dangerous. She wouldn't let him go through with this. She couldn't let him have the throne. 

"Destroy the Fold," she answered. "Using the Fold to destroy our enemies will not resolve anything. It would only make nations rise to destroy us in turn. The Fold cannot be controlled. You don't know enough about it to understand what the cost would be." 

"You fear I would be so twisted with greed that I would use the power selfishly?" He raised his brow at her and she instinctively squeezed harder. 

"You were greedy when you used merzost were you not?" 

He laughed bitterly. "I did want power, yes. I needed the power. It wasn't because I craved it. I admit I became obsessed with it, but only because it is the only thing that can make people listen. Power ensures people respect you. When I first used merzost it was unselfish. I needed to fight against the King's army that wanted to kill everyone I cared about. My people. My friends. My lover…" Aleksander swallowed and she suddenly felt his sorrow like it was her own. "They killed her. I knew we didn't have the numbers and Grisha were not trained as fighters back then. I had to take matters into my own hands. I didn't intend to create the Fold. I just wanted to use the army as my own. They turned into volcra and my shadows expanded into what it is today." 

Alina breathed heavily. They had stripped away everything from him. The King placed a bounty on his head and all the Grisha that stood with him. He loved someone and they murdered her. The loneliness and loss seeped through her and it merged with her own. 

"Everything I have done…" he spoke with tear-stained eyes. "Everything I have ever done is to make Ravka safer, to make Grisha safe." 

"Aleksander, you can't fight your way through a war thinking this will make a difference. The Fold has to be destroyed or else you're nothing but what they say you are. A Heretic. A Villain." 

His face morphed into interest. He cocked his head to the side, her fingers still gripping him. 

"You would make me into a villain even now knowing what you know?" 

It was all about perspective, wasn't it? From his side, he was the hero of his own story. Fighting a battle only he knew he could win. She couldn't condone him killing an entire settlement of Novokribirsk for the sake of the betterment of Ravka. She couldn't condone killing the King and Queen or their successors. Something else had to happen. She had to do something. 

"Force the King to abdicate and hand over the throne." 

His eyes lit up in surprise. His mouth turned up in a barely-there smile. 

"And who will take over?" 

Her eyes narrowed and she pushed him back onto the bed, hovering above him. He went easily and she was caught between wanting to punch or kiss him. 

"Me," she said. 

"Little Alina," he cooed, "how you've grown. Not so naive after all. You want to take the throne for yourself? You think you can manage that? You think you can do anything without me?" 

"I think you sorely underestimate me." 

His dark eyes glistened. He was pleased. He liked that she was taking what she wanted and that made her even more determined to prove she didn't need him. She didn't exist for him. Taking over Ravka was not only to push him out, it was also so that she could help others. She knew she had it in her. She was the Sun Summoner, the most powerful Grisha besides the one that was now pinned to the bed. A viscous need coursed through her. 

She wanted. 

The Amplifier may have changed many things about her. She felt drunk with power. No, that wasn't it. Her mind was clearer than it had ever been. 

"I am the one that should rule Ravka," she said as her hand glided over his black kefta until it reached his heart. 

For a moment she wondered if she should kill him. Would her powers be strong enough? The Cut would be easy now that he was so close and with the powers that was Amplified… 

But what would that do? She would be no better than him if she did that. Still, he was still a threat to all of Ravka. What would she do with him? 

"Let me rule beside you. I'm perfectly aware of your potential, lapushka . I've always known what you can do. I've been waiting for this moment and I'm sure you can believe me when I say that I envisioned this. You and me. Together on the throne. This was always what was meant to happen." 

"You...you wanted me to rule with you?" 

He nodded. "You were never just a pawn. I would never have tossed you away once I got what I wanted. There really is no one like us, Alina, and I intend to keep you with me. Our powers are the dawn of a new world and we can forge a new Ravka in our name. We can bring every Grisha to safety, especially those refugees that are hiding from the Fjerdians. We can safeguard all of Ravka and unite it into one. We can do so many things together. Just you and me. We're all we need anyway. Tell me you want that?" 

She hesitated. He was right yet again. He had knowledge beyond her years and he would be a great asset to her. There was another reason why she couldn't kill him. Of why she couldn't even bear the thought of making him an eternal prisoner. Was she a monster because she knew she loved him? He had made her fall for him ever since she first laid eyes on him. She was drawn to him like no other. Even now as she loomed over him, she wanted him. She wanted him in ways she knew she shouldn't. It was so sinful the way she could easily take off his clothes and make him fuck her. He would say yes. 

The thought made her blood boil and wetness gather between her legs. 

King and Queen of Ravka. The Sun Saint and The Black Heretic.  

Alina climbed on top of him. 

"You and I are going to change the world," she told him and kissed him before he could speak. 

Chapter Text

The shadows swarmed around her. She didn't feel suffocated anymore. She felt peace. They were part of her now, the shadows were hers as well. Her hands reached out above her to create a dome of light around the skiff. Her dream had mirrored this. They called to her like they called to him. Alexander had wanted to make a show of her power, show her off, use the light to control the Fold so that he may expand it over Novakrisbirk. He wanted to kill Zlatan and for good reason. It frustrated her that he was technically justified in his actions. Because she wanted him dead, too. Killing the entire city would do more harm than good though. 

"Let them live," she argued with him. 

He eyed her from his position next to her. He looked in front of him towards the endless blackness of the Fold that broke apart with her light. 

"Fine," he said. "We won't destroy it. But I want to show them our power. I want them to kneel before us." 

She stared at her golden dress that had been patterned with beautiful designs in black. Her colour and his. They were inevitably entwined. They had been heading here since the day she realised who she was. This was her destiny. Genya had sent a letter to the King forcing him to sign abdication in exchange for the cure to his current unwell state. Alina knew Genya had the means and proximity to poison him. She had been a spy for Aleksander all along. Perhaps Genya could stay at Little Palace with them when they eventually became the new monarchy. She could convince Mal to be her Guard or she could let him go and find a girl to live on a farm with like he always wanted. 

She had choices to make. Choices that would affect the entirety of Ravka. 

"What do we do about Zlatan?" Alina asked. 

"Whatever you want, Alina . " 

"He killed Marie...he must die." 

Aleksander didn't let his approval of her ruthlessness go amiss. He grabbed her face, kissing her with force and intensity that made her knees weaken. 

"Say the word and it shall be done." 

"How about a formal execution? Show everyone that our power is not to be trifled with. And while we're at it, I fear the Apparat is working against us. I feel we must stop him before his plans unfold." 

"What do you suggest?" 

"Imprisonment for treason." 

"Ah. A harmless punishment." 

"A mercy," she corrected. 

"My Sol Koroleva . How breathtaking you are in your wickedness yet beautiful for your kind heart." 

"Is that your way of saying you love me?" 

Aleksander smiled, clear amusement in his voice as he said, "I think I've made my feelings about you clear . " 

She wasn’t sure how to reply to that, convinced that he could never return how she felt. The longing in her veins to be loved for who she was and not used by him. The way he stared at her now; she knew. It was there. It was always there. She made him weak. He had given her control over him when she slept with him, when he gave her his name, when he opened up. She remembered all his words to her. They were the truth. All he wanted was an equal. He needed her to shatter the loneliness inside of him that had fested for centuries. The darkness in him called to the darkness in her. The light she bared shone over him. There was light in him like a candle flickering, fragile, but burning despite the corruption of his soul. 

"Let it be done then. Tomorrow.” 

"As you wish." He nodded. 

"The Fold needs to be destroyed." 

His black eyes searched hers. There was defiance there, like a viper ready to argue with her again. His plans needed The Fold under his command. Her face was stoic, carefully contained in her unwavering decision and he let out a sigh. 

"Fine. Do what you need to do." 

"It'll open better trading with other countries and uniting the two - Ravka as one. This will be beneficial for everyone. The war will be over. There would be no need for this Army. We could free everyone." 

"The Lantsov children won't stand for this. They'll want the throne." He challenged her to come with a solution. She liked that he was giving her the opportunity to speak her mind and be listened to. 

"Visily will be kept in a secure place with his parents. We can place them in a location where we can keep an eye on them. Get Grisha soldiers to guard and report any mention of an uprising." 

"Agreed. And the other son? Nikolai."

"We can reason with him, can't we? Isn't he studying?" 

Aleksander titled his head in thought. "I think I heard he's been sailing the seas on some ship he has. He aids the war effort. I think we can strike a deal with him. We let him live his life as a privateer and we offer our military support in his endeavours. Resources that only the Tsar can give." 

"I want to meet him." 

"And so you shall. But I have to warn you. He's very charming. Arrogant little brat, if I'm honest." 

Alina smirked. "I think I know how to deal with men who think they can get anything they want." 

Aleksander's jaw locked, but he didn't correct her. He knew she had him. 

After the Fold was destroyed, a celebration occurred. A grand party at the Palace. The crowning of the two Summoners who saved Ravka would take place in a week and Alina was eager to get it over with. The faster she was Queen the quicker she could make a change. There were people who believed in her. They worshipped her and sought her help. She would help Grisha and non-Grisha alike. She would help anyone she can. She remembered her time at the orphanage, fighting for food and trying to stay alive. She couldn't let that happen to anyone else. She would make a plan to aid orphanages like Keramzin. 

She glided into the room, confident even with the antlers around her neck. Her new kefta was gold with black embroidery and was almost the same one that she had at the Winter Fete, except it in reverse and it had her symbol put on it. The sun in ascendancy and next to it merged with her own was his - the sun in eclipse. This would be the new symbol of Ravka. It would hang on walls, tapestries, on pins and embossed on books and wax seals. It would hold a message of hope for everyone. Light and Dark joined together. The Good and Bad in all of us. Alina was confident that she could keep Aleksander in check. He actually wanted her opinion and that made all the difference.  

Equals. 

"As always, Moy Tsarista, " he said, coming up beside her. "You look beautiful." 

"I'm not Queen yet." 

"Yet." 

There was a sparkle to his eyes and brightness to his smile. He looked entirely relaxed and at peace. She liked that she did this to him. The power she had over him. And she liked the way he captivated her. There was a tandem to their movements as they walked into the center of the room, music swelling as they clasped each other for a dance. He watched her as she lost herself in the steps. The gold clips in her hair glistening off the chandelier light. She was glowing, beaming. Her face was soft, calm and joyful with a smile on her face that she couldn't hold back. Entirely at one with herself. He marvelled at her. She watched him in turn. The regal look, hair swept back and face a mask for the vulnerable man beneath. His kefta was black as always, and much to his initial reluctance, with gold embroidery - their symbols etched at his right breast. She smoothed her hand over it. 

"This is all I ever wanted for you, Alina," he spoke into her ear like a secret just for her. "For both of us." 

She nodded in understanding probably for the first time. 

They left the party early and he found home between her legs. He spent hours there letting her pant out how much she needed him. She was lost within him. Having him here, with her, as the new rulers awoke something inside of her. The power she possessed, the acceptance of who she was. This was always meant to be. She was destined to be Grisha. He was licking his way into her, coaxing her into her third orgasm, when she pulled him roughly by his hair. 

He grunted and stared wide-eyed at her. “What do you want, Sol Koroleva?”  

Her heart beat wildly in her chest. She looked at him and knew he would do anything she asked. 

“Lay down.” 

He rolled over onto back, naked and willing. His chest rose and fell rapidly and his cock leaked from the lack of attention. He bared his teeth and bit back a groan as she came to sit on him. Her legs fell on either side of him, but she moved so that she purposefully missed his cock and rolled herself over his stomach. Her wetness gathered there, making his skin wet. She pressed herself against him, rubbing her breasts over his chest. He let out a harsh breath. 

“I see you do intend to kill me after all.” 

She smiled at that. “I don’t go against my word.” 

“Then you make right on that. You promised yourself that you would end my life? One way or another?” 

“You know I can’t kill you,” she whispered, honesty cutting her like a dagger in her heart. 

“And I cannot bear to lose you either. I’m thankful you’d rather have me by your side than anywhere else.” 

“I can’t let you go. I can’t imprison you to an eternal life of cruelty. I can’t...I tried so hard to think of what to do with you. Every moment we were on that skiff, I thought about doing it and what I would become if I did. I made my choice when I kissed you and it took me a while to understand it. You and I are bound together just as you said. We can fight and maim each other. We can spend centuries in battle with each other and neither of us would be satisfied. There was no endgame, but this. This way, we both win.” 

“Do you love me, Alina?” He surprised her by asking. When she didn’t immediately respond he said, “Could you forgive me? Could you understand this broken man and learn to accept him for who he is as he has always accepted you? Could you learn to know me, challenge me in the best way possible? Could you live a long and happy life by my side as my true and only partner? Would you not only do this because you know you need to help Ravka, but you could also admit to me that you want to be Queen because I am your King? That is not only out of the necessity of our country's needs, but out of love?” 

Alina held her breath. How could he not know by now? 

She supposed she didn’t give him reason to believe that her feelings were true. She had fought with him and betrayed him just as he had done to her. It was plain to see how he loved her. Irrevocable. Unyielding, with a force that could burn the entire world to the ground. He loved her in a way that he knew nothing else but this. His very nature opposes his utter devotion to her. And yes, she loved him back. Wholly and without reason. 

Her hand reached to stroke his cheek lightly and he shut his eyes. She shifted backwards and lifted herself up and onto his cock. A broken moan escaped his mouth and she gasped at the feeling of him filling her up. She settled against him and stayed still. He opened his eyes and watched her. In this silent moment, she was his and he was hers. Their breaths stuttered as she rolled her hips into a slow rhythm. 

“Yes, Aleksander,” she moaned. “Yes.” 

Their climaxes built up, heat and lust and love swirling around them. Once they had come down, he held her in his arms. 

“Do you believe I could be a better man?” 

“Do you believe I could turn into a monster?” 

“I believe we all have the capacity to be everything. That being said, there is too much heart in you. And there are too many scars on me. We both change in new ways to accommodate each other. I certainly have. Our natures and nurtures are complex and that’s what makes us unique as a species, but you and I are the only ones like us. We are made perfect for each other. That’s the difference. You are not just one thing. You are everything.” 

He kissed her forehead. “Shall I tell you a story?” 

He began speaking about a boy that lived centuries ago. One who had to go into hiding. He longed for companionship and love, which he never got from the mother he had. He was alone in the world. Upon his travels where he took a new name many times, he thought he could find friendship in a small village where they stayed. In a moment, a significant moment, he revealed himself as what he was. A Shadow Summoner. When the children he played with learned of his gift, that he could amplify Grisha powers, they tried to drown him to wear his bones. The boy was never sure if he would find peace in what he was, always afraid of himself, of who he was. Power was his only friend and comfort. So he sought it out, and did everything he could to get it. After being alone for so long, he met a young girl that was a bright light, a symbol of hope in his dark world. He meant to be with her, use her gift along with his own to bring peace to his country no matter the cost. She understood him. Knew him. He started to love her. The price he had to pay for losing her would be greater than the cost of his goal. So he let her lead him. Let her come to him. He made mistakes. But all along he was trying to be better for her. And by some miracle she loved him back. Now the shadows over his world grow dim, blotched out by her light. 

He has hope now. 

When he finished his story, she saw tears fall from his eyes. She wiped them away. Only when his thumb came to cheek did she realise she was crying as well. They wiped each other’s tears away. 

“You were never alone, Aleksander.” 

She kissed him and drew his body to hers again. 

There wasn't anything he wouldn't grant her. Where he was ruthless and unrelenting, she was kind and forgiving. When she was formidable, he was understanding and honest. They balanced each other out. There were no two rulers quite like them. They pulled each other back from causing destruction, they reasoned with each other-- sometimes fighting that the whole Palace erupted with sun and shadow swirling in rolling waves like the True Sea. They always came to a compromise. Ravka flourished and they gained the power necessary to negotiate with the Fjerdians and all those who even thought of opposing them.  

This was all she ever needed. Her monster. Her King. Her husband. They had always been the same. 

There could be no light without shadow. 

She was finally free.