Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

7:38 am Feb 9

Message from unknown number

(7:38) What are u doing serenading the bakery employees? Hurry up I’m hungry

(7:50) ???

(7:51) Nicky, stop playing games get me my fckin muffin. You lost the bet and Ms. Patty has her “I’m going to a bitch for no reason” dress on so I need it

(7:55) Damn someone woke up on the wrong side of bed.

(7:56) class is about to start dumbass where r u

(7:57) I don’t know who Nicky is but if I were him I wouldn’t get you that muffin, you’re kind of an asshole

(7:57) are u trying to b funny or something? Failing miserably btw

(7:58) wrong number, muffin-loving jackass

(7:58) you think ur so clever don’t u I’m gonna get it sooner or later

(7:58) okayyy well now that you’re done bitching at me I better get to my class

—

(11:20) did you get your muffin

(11:27) you’re not Nicky

(11:28) No shit Sherlock, it’s what I was trying to tell you

(11:28) are u always such a smartass

(11:36) are you always such a dickhead?

(11:38) don’t u have a class to be paying attention to stranger

(11:38) don’t you have a muffin to be aggressively inhaling?

(11:40) didn’t answer my question

(11:41) Neither did you

read

—

8:03 pm Feb 11

(8:03) by any chance do you happen to be good at writing sappy personal essays

(8:18) why are u still texting me

(8:22) Idk really, maybe I was sent by the big guy below to annoy you as karma for being a little shit

(8:25) do u want me to help you or are you trying to see how fast I can block you

(8:26) …essay assistance would be preferable yes.

(8:26) Just lie

(8:28) What do you mean just… lie?

(8:30) I’m gonna make a wild guess and say you’re having trouble with the “sappy” part rather than the “English” part considering your colorful vocabulary. So just make some random shit up that fits the prompt and there u go: sappy essay. Are u a bad liar?

(8:31) Nah, got that covered. But what do I even say? I have to write about a “low point in my life” whatever that means

(8:32) put urself in someone else’s position. Think of some random movie you’ve watched and take the main characters trauma, make it your own. Easy A. (try to talk about how that experience changed your life they eat that shit up)

(8:32) hmm yeah I think I can manage that

(8:35) good now fuck off for a while, I was trying to read before you interrupted me

(8:35) what are you reading?

(8:39) Sappy essays aren’t going to write themselves genius

(8:40) Fine. You’re annoying anyways

(8:44) Aww would u look at that. The sentiment is mutual

—

Andrew had no idea what he was doing replying to this little annoyance as he liked to refer to them as. In most cases, he would’ve just blocked the stranger, and their blatant attitude problem wasn’t doing them any favors either. He guessed he was bored. Andrew wasn’t exactly intrigued by this person, he replied because he had nothing else to do.

Who knows? Maybe they could keep his interest long enough to distract him from this god forsaken hell hole. Ha. God-forsaken. Isn’t that ironic?

He walked down to the dining hall with his brother, cousin and Kevin by his side.

He was tired from exy practice that afternoon, which meant he was also starving. They were already late for dinner. Andrew just wanted to eat his plain mash potatoes and ham in peace, but of course the universe shitted on him every chance it got.

“Are you not going to say Grace before you eat? Do you understand how disrespectful that is? God hears and sees all, don’t take the gift of food for granted.” said Martha from calculus.

Andrew slowly turned to look at her, a wide grin on his face “If he can hear all he can hear me say he can kiss my-“

Nicky quickly cut in, laughing nervously “Hahaha just forget it Martha. You should hurry up and finish, don’t want to be late for morning prayer do you?” he had a sickly sweet smile on his face, Andrew wanted to throw his mash potatoes at the girls face.

Almost like snapping out of a trance, she smiled “You’re right Nicholas. I’ll see you there won’t I?”

Nicky looked increasingly uncomfortable “Umm I don’t know maybe haha.”

Andrew snapped his fingers in front of the girls face “Weren’t you going? You should get going. Toodle-oo, auf wiedersehen, get lost.”

Martha glared at him one last time, holding tight onto her rosary and finally walked away.

“It’s late, we should head back too. Practice starts early tomorrow and we still have so much to work on. Aaron needs to practice his passing and Nicky-“ Kevin added once she was gone.

“Kevin?” Andrew said.

“Yeah?“ he replied.

“I suggest you shut up about your precious stickball for tonight unless you want balls aimed at your ankles for the next week.” Andrew said in a too cheery tone.

“But-“ Kevin tried to argue

“Oh? You said you’d like them aimed at your forehead too? Oh you mustn’t beg, I’d be happy to oblige.” he said it like he was explaining the concept of addition to a kindergartner.

Kevin grumbled under his breath but didn’t bring the topic up again for the rest of the night. Andrew took it as victory and went to bed.

—

3:23 pm Feb 13

(3:23) I’m curious, are you a girl or a boy? Non-binary? Rather not disclose?

(3:30) Wow, didn’t know I was in a 2010 kik conversation. Also would you look at that, a progressive human being with braincells.

(3:32) shut up don’t be an ass. Will you answer yes or no?

(3:32) hmm let me think about it

(3:33) -_-

(3:33) you did not just send me an annoyed text emote

(3:33) what’s wrong with text emotes! I think they’re great >:(

(3:34) 1%

(3:34) what’s that supposed to mean?

(3:35) It’s your I Hate You meter. Goes up every time my hate for you grows.

(3:36) delightful. Will you answer or not?

(3:36) Sure, I’ll bite. On one condition, I’m not gonna reveal info without any in return. If I answer, you owe me an answer to a question of mine.

(3:37) Seems fair enough. I accept, as long as the questions are within reason of course

(3:38) I’m a boy

(3:38) Alright, what grade are you in?

(3:39) Not ur turn, but I’m a senior in highschool. I can go twice now, answer the same questions.

(3:39) I’m a male, also in my senior year of highschool

(3:39) Ok

(3:39) what? Disappointed I’m not a hot girl on the cheer squad? Didn’t think you’d care

(3:40) I don’t care about anything. You would do well to remember that

(3:42) Somehow, I don’t believe you. There must be at least something you care about

(3:42) I don’t care wether you believe me or not

(3:43) Point taken
(3:43) You can call me Neil. What can I call you?

(3:49) Andrew
(3:50) Are we done playing 20 questions? I have a pending nap to take care of

(3:51) Enjoy your beauty sleep your highness

(3:51) Can’t hear your passive aggressive remarks, already drifting off

(3:52) Actually, you can’t hear me at all. You can only read my text messages Andrew.

(3:53) Stfu, Neil

(3:54) talk to you later!

—

1:42 pm Mar 2

(1:42) I think our French teacher just passed away
(1:42) Would I get in trouble for leaving early
(1:42) I know more french than him anyways
(1:43) Oh, nope. Still alive and kicking. Let out the ugliest snore
(1:43) A kid has started throwing small paper balls into his mouth, the others are joining
(1:43) They’ve successful thrown 6
(1:43) I must say, I’m a little impressed

(2:06) do you ever pay attention in class?

(2:07) Sure, sometimes, just not this one.
(2:07) doing anything interesting?

(2:09) Currently watching my twin brother flirt with a cheerleader behind a desk, he thinks I can’t see him. A little pathetic really

(2:10) So you’re just casually going to drop the “I have a twin brother” bomb and not explain anything more?

(2:10) Yup. Did you honestly expect anything else?

(2:12) touché
(2:15) Ha they just caught a kid with an action comic book. Off to detention he goes

(2:15) You’re not allowed to have comic books? Weird

(2:16) Some are allowed, but they’re all inspected before you can keep them. Can’t have anything depicting explicit violence, it’s “damaging to the youthful psyche” as they say.
(2:16) would you look at that, he’s finally awake :)

[2 Image attachments]

A picture of a pudgy balding man spitting paper balls from his mouth.

The second one was of the same man standing up, looking around the room like he didn’t know where he was and what year they were in.

(2:18) Are u sure this man knows what continent he’s in? Let alone that he’s supposed to be teaching French to a bunch of teens?

—

Neil snorted and shook his head, typing out a quick response.

Matt narrowed his eyes at him, his lips twitching up into a grin. “What are you smiling about? You know, for someone who claims to hate phones you sure do spend a lot of time using it.”

Neil rolled his eyes at his friend, deciding not to respond. He’s been in this facility since freshman year, ever since that bitch Lola locked him in and threw away the key.

His mom was gone, his father made sure of that after his men abducted him from his school in Germany.

Neil had fought back, he hadn’t let them take him without a fight, but in the end… there was only so much he could do. He had been surrounded, caged in; nowhere to run, nowhere to hide.

The inpatient youth program had three types of people:

1. The violent and/or troubled kids. (Like Dan)
2. The mentally unstable rich kids who were shoved in here because their busy mommies and daddies didn’t want to deal with them (like his friend Allison).
3. The ones who were sent here because someone in their lives cared about their well-being and wished to see them recover. (like Matt’s mother did) but this one was the least likely, and rarest occasion.

Sometimes it was a mixture of different ones.
As one can imagine, these circumstances led them to be closely monitored despite it being a recipe for disaster. You don’t shove a bunch of mentally ill teens into a glorified boarding school with extra steps and expect it to go swell.

And then there was ‘Neil Josten’ as he was now known as. He didn’t ask to be here, he didn’t want to be here.

His father now thought so little of him that he didn’t care what was done with him, satisfied with finally taking Mary Hatford down. That would’ve been well and good, if it wasn’t for the fact that he left Lola in charge of him.

She stuffed him in here the first chance she got, finding his desperation at being caged like an animal intriguing and entertaining.

Eventually (begrudgingly), Neil got used to life here. He tried to keep to himself, trying to find a way to break out, runaway again. He had dropped that plan after a year, it wouldn’t work. He could leave the facility if he tried hard enough, but having no money, no resources, and his father’s men on the search, he never got far.

He still didn’t understand how, but he had ended up becoming friends with Matt Boyd, Dan Wilds, and Allison Reynolds.

It had started with a group project in chemistry, and then suddenly they began sitting with him at lunch, dropping by his dorm room, hanging out with him casually.

Neil didn’t mind it so much now, used to his friends unique personalities.

The bell rung and they gathered their things, walking down the halls to their final class: calculus.

Allison wrapped an arm around Neil’s shoulders “Aw what? Did our Neil get himself a little crush? Come on, don’t keep all the tea to yourself!”

Dan laughed “Allison, you’re doing that thing again where you don’t mind your own business.”

Allison rolled her eyes, letting the topic drop. She flipped her long blonde hair off her shoulders “That’s okay, we’ll find out sooner or later. You keep your secrets Josten.” she said menacingly.

Neil pulled out his phone.

—

2:49 pm Mar 2

(2:49) I am surrounded by nosy ass people

(2:53) I am surrounded by idiots (you’re one of them btw)

(2:53) Haha.
(2:53) ._.
(2:53) but seriously my friend Allison, she’s like a drama hound. Wants to know everyone’s business, proud of it too.
(2:54) My two other friends aren’t totally innocent either
(2:54) They all think you’re a girl I’m crushing on, can you believe that?

(2:57) Do I give off hot cheerleader vibes or am I more goth preppy chic?

(2:57) :3 asshole vibes

(2:59) . . .
(2:59) did u just-
(3:00) “:3” at me?
(3:00) That’s it. Thats my last straw.

(3:01) HAHA
(3:01) IT’S FUNNY U GET SO ANNOYED
(3:02) maybe I’ll start using it more often…

—

(3:40) Andrew?

(5:08) Earth to Drew?

(6:28) SIR??

(6:30) Have u learned your lesson?

(6:30) Can’t believe you ignored me for hours because I used that emote

(6:31) I can. It’s officially banned.

(6:31) … fine. Have it your way

(6:50) Hey u mentioned you’re good at math

(6:54) yeah, why?

(6:56) A fair trade. I helped you with that one essay, it’s time you repay that debt

(7:00) sure, what is it?

(7:09) Calculus

(7:11) Oooo my favorite

(7:12) You are the most atrocious creature I’ve ever spoken to

(7:12) :) Andrew just send me the problems before I magically become busy

(7:16): [3 Image Attachments]
(7:16) Here they are. U have got to be the only kid in the northern hemisphere who enjoys calculus

(7:17) That is statistically impossible.

(7:20) Hear that? It’s the sound of me not giving a fuck about math related shit

(7:39) Asshole
(7:40) [3 Image Attachments] here

(7:42) Glad doing business with u

(8:00) I’ll take that as a “thx Neil, you’re the best!”
(8:01) Anyways I’ll talk to you tomorrow. Getting my phone taken away for tonight because I ‘accidentally’ flushed my pills down the toilet.
(8:02) I must go… remember me Andrew!

(8:15) You’re lit so dramatic

—

4:00 am Mar 5

(4:00) Do you ever wonder what’s it like not being afraid of anything?

(4:01) Dunno u tell me

(4:03) Why’re you awake so late?

(4:04) Why are u awake

(4:10) I guess we both can’t sleep
(4:10) Hey it’s my turn right?
(4:11) What are you afraid of?

(4:38) Heights. Never cared for them very much

Chapter Text

Mar 28, 3:15 pm

Neil: What’s your school like?
Andrew: Uniforms, hormonal teens, and an abundance of idiots
Neil: Hmm what kind of uniforms? Are we talking public school white shirt and navy blue pants or full suit with necktie?
Andrew: the more painful one.
Neil: I cannot believe it.
Neil:THE One and Only Andrew
Neil: wears a suit and tie everyday to class
Neil: what a refined, respectable young gentleman
Andrew: I ponder which method I should use to end ur sad little life everyday
Neil:Aw you think about me that much? Consider me flattered
Andrew: I’ve decided to go with death by suffocation. Strangling sounds delightful doesn’t it?
Neil: I thought you would come up with something more creative than that
Neil: And isn’t that the beauty of this long distance arrangement? I can run my mouth as much as I want
Andrew: Ah yes, your favorite hobby
Neil: my ONLY hobby
Andrew: Enjoy running your mouth to the great void, I’ve got practice

Andrew had been talking to Neil for a little over a month now. It became a daily routine. He admitted to himself (begrudgingly) that Neil was a great source of entertainment. He wasn’t pushy or overly obnoxious like everyone around him. He wasn’t demanding in the slightest, easily respecting his boundaries. He had a scarily accurate way to detect the many walls Andrew put in place.

Neil asked a lot of questions for someone who was adept at avoiding them. This, amongst other things, Andrew had picked on quickly. Neil would ask him things, never too personal, never quite as simple as ‘what’s your favorite color?’ either, but rather questions bloomed out of curiosity. On the other hand, Neil would give him clear cut responses. Mundane answers, so casual and generic that they almost seemed fabricated. Or he would dodge questions altogether, which only gave his suspicions a more solid foundation.

Oh Neil, a thorn at his side and pathological liar? The particular maze that made up Neil seemed normal at first glance, but once you began navigating, the walls would shift and turn until you found yourself right back at the start. Not boring, not boring at all. So Andrew would keep him around, until he inevitably lost interest, as he always does.

For the first time this past month, Andrew found himself wondering what Neil looked like. He thought about, his efforts proving fruitless. The image he created kept constantly warping, never sticking. He thought about it some more when he was pushed out of his thoughts by the familiar blaring buzz of the goal. Hm, someone had scored on him. So sad.

“Minyard you didn’t even try to block that! I might as well practice with the wall you’re litera-“ droned on their starting striker, Kennedy, notorious homophobe, and a general waste of air. Andrew tuned him out about 99% of the time. His voice was raspy. Not in a hot way, but the obnoxious voice cracking kind. Andrew would put it up there on his list of unpleasant noises, right under scraping nails on chalkboards.

“Honestly I don’t even know why Coach keeps you around. It’s about time we get a new-“ Andrew could care less about exy, but he made a deal, he intended to keep it. Exy will and has always been a means to an end.

He leveled Kevin with a wide grin “Tell your parasite to shut up before I end up suspended.”
Kevin’s eyebrow twitched, he was obviously fighting the urge not to argue, but Andrew had already turned his attention elsewhere.

He was dimly aware of the arguing and the scathing looks being thrown his direction, but he could care less. He was tapping his foot impatiently when the his wristwatch displayed 5:00 pm.

He became animated again. He sucked his teeth sarcastically, “Would you look at time… looks like I’ve got to go. Nice pimple by the way. They could replace you with rudolf and Santa wouldn’t tell the difference.”

Kennedy’s face went red, looking around at his teammates that were trying to hide their chuckles. Andrew didn’t stay long enough to hear him throw his toddler fit, showering and changing as fast he could so he could once again meet his saving grace: his bed.

He laid flat on the mattress, pulling out his phone to check his messages. A few from Kevin and Aaron, ignored. Several messages from Nicky that he would surely never read, and Neil.

4:13 pm

Neil: You play a sport? What sport?
Neil: You’re not allowed to say baseball
Neil: Andrew if you say you’re on the baseball team I don’t think I will ever recover
Neil: Maybe I will, because I’m generous. Only after you quit of course.

5:38 pm

Andrew: u are so fuckin dramatic
Neil: I’ve been praying to whatever deity exists that my fears aren’t a reality
Neil: are you here to put my mind at peace?
Andrew: first, what do you have against baseball? Second, no I play exy
Andrew: unfortunately
Neil: The only right answer really
Neil: What position?
Andrew: Goalie
Neil: how good is your schools team?
Andrew: mid
Neil: what’re your stats?
Andrew: I am not talking about stickball with u
Andrew: I already get enough of it from Kevin
Neil: Kevin?
Andrew: Kevin Day, the biggest migraine I’ll ever have

Andrew looked down at his phone curiously. Neil completely stopped replying. Usually he would give Andrew a heads up when he would take long to reply, strange. Andrew shrugged, going back to his English homework. Whatever it was, Neil would sort it out.

——

Neil could not sort out what the fuck he just read. What are the chances that the guy he was talking to personally knew his Kevin Day. It had to be a coincidence, there’s millions of Kevins in America.

’But how many with the last name Day?’ whispered that little annoying voice in his head. He had to calm down. It was no big deal anyway, he was already caught.

That didn’t make his heart drum any less.

He sighed, ignoring the raised brow he got from Matt. “Trouble in paradise?” he asked casually.

Neil’s brows furrowed in confusion “What does that even mean?”

Matt shook his head “Sometimes I forget how clueless you are.”

Apr 28, 6:38am

Neil: what is the point of English homework
Andrew: to learn English
Neil: but I already know English, therefore I say we veto english as a subject
Andrew: you would do anything but sit down and write an essay
Neil: That would be correct
Neil: Anyways as I procrastinate tell me what you’re up to
Andrew: Ignoring Nicky rant about his crush
Neil: Nicky? Is that the famous twin?
Andrew: nah, my faulty clone is out on a secret date
Neil: why “secret”
Andrew: he thinks I don’t know
Neil: Strained relationship with the twin brother I’m guessing?
Andrew: He’s the “faulty” clone for a reason
Andrew: They’re probably out remaking the spaghetti scene from lady and the tramp
Neil: What’s lady and the tramp
Andrew: you’re joking right
Neil: Nope. Is this one of those super famous shows or films I’m supposed to know about but don’t
Neil: Matt says I’m clueless when it comes to pop culture
Neil: I’m still trying to figure out what that means exactly
Andrew: Next ur gonna say you don’t know what Harry Potter is
Neil: am I supposed to know who he is?
Andrew: this is where I draw the line
Andrew: you have a new English assignment, from me
Andrew: read Harry Potter immediately
Neil: Okay, beats doing this essay

Apr 28, 9:35 pm

Neil: alright I’m at the school library
Neil: holy shit there’s like 10 of these
Neil: So do I just start with Harry Potter and sorcerer’s stone?
Andrew: Neil, why are you in your school’s library at 9 pm
Neil: I went in of course
Neil: It doesn’t matter much because I live on campus
Neil: It’s supposed to be closed by 5 but who cares, minor details right?
Andrew: you broke in.
Neil: I wouldn’t put it thaaatt way. I simply just… took a nightly stroll and went on the search for knowledge
Andrew: so you broke in
Neil: yes I broke in, but that’s besides the point. Focus Andrew!
Neil: Sorcerer’s stone or no
Andrew: yes that’s the one
Neil: I will be back with details

Apr 29, 1:10 am

Neil: All three of them piss me off
Neil: ”Who’s Nicolas Flamel??”
Neil: how about you mind your own fucking business
Neil: I swear if they go looking for the stupid stone

2:15 am

Neil: for the love of fucking christ
Neil: I propose an alternate path
Neil: one where fluffy consumes them for being nosy
Neil: A light snack for the three headed dog.

3:00 am

Neil: Voldys face is wHERE??
Neil: I have gotten whiplash
Neil: what kind of creepy shit is this

3:36 am

Neil: how are they even still alive
Neil: this has to be the biggest plot armor I’ve ever laid my eyes upon

4:20 am

Neil: I got the next book
Neil: and put back the other

5:50 am

Neil: oh fuck when did it get this late
Neil: My roommates waking up

Apr 29, 8:45 am

Andrew: did you stay up all night reading Harry Potter
Neil: maybe
Neil: perhaps
Neil: yes…
Neil: It pissed me off half the time, but I couldn’t stop reading
Andrew: so you didn’t sleep at all?
Neil: yeah pretty much
Neil: but that’s alright, I don’t get much sleep regardless
Neil: thankfully there won’t be classes
Neil: It’s visiting day
Andrew: visiting day?
Neil: yeah it’s when relatives or friends come to visit the students for a certain amount of time
Neil: they’re only allowed to come once every few months

Andrew looked at his phone for a whole minute, taking apart this information carefully.

Andrew: If you don’t have class u should try doing this crazy new thing: catching up on sleep
Neil: you’re probably right, I can feel a migraine coming on
Neil: I’ll text you later Drew, good luck with classes

Andrew tried to ignore the way his heart pang at being called ‘Drew.’ The first time he did it, Andrew was sure it was a typo, or he was too lazy to write out his full name. But bit by bit he noticed it pop up again. Not often, but it did. And it was always used in the same context. “Goodnight Drew.” “Morning drew.” “Good luck with the quiz drew.”

It was stupid and rather annoying the way it made him feel. He shoved down the feeling and focused on getting to class.

It was a long day, especially not having Neil to distract him from lessons. He managed to buy a cigarette off a sophomore who was selling and sneaked out back to smoke it. It had been months since he last had some nicotine. He watched the smoke disperse in the air, enjoying the slight calmness it brought him.

“I thought you said you were quitting.” Came a soft female voice from his left.

“I said I would cut back, not quit.” he replied curtly.

Renee Walker, one of the less intolerable people in this school, and currently his best friend, sat on the sidewalk next to him. She tilted her head at him, her rainbow dyed tips looking almost iridescent in the afternoon sunlight. “Not texting Neil today?”

“He’s asleep.” Usually he would flat out ignore Neil-related questions from anyone else, but there was no point in hiding it from Renee. She knew him too well, plus he trusted her.

“Any updates on his end?” she tried to ask subtly, but Andrew knew exactly what she meant.

“He’s not queer, Renee.” he replied.

“Well did you ask if he was?” she gave him a knowing look.

“No, but it’s obvious he isn’t interested.” Andrew tried to test it out before, without being direct about it. He’d drop hints about his sexuality, hints he thought were pretty obvious. He even talked about celebrities of both genders out of those “hottest celebs in Hollywood” magazines, and nothing. Neil didn’t seem interested in any of it.

Renee sighed, leaning back on her arms. “You, my friend, need to stop assuming the worst in people.”

“Not when 99% of the time I’m right.” he concluded.

Renee folded her legs into a crisscross position “Okay then let’s both try to be more positive about things. Anything new you’ve learned.”

“Same old, same old. Although I did notice some weird stuff.”

Renee perked up, excited to hear any details on who she claimed would be his future husband (absolutely not).

“He’s never specified what kind of school he goes to, but shit about it is not normal. Even for private boarding school standards.” he flicked some of the cigar’s ashes onto the floor.

“What makes you think that?” she asked.

“They monitor most of the literary media he consumes. He takes like 4 different meds every morning, and as far as I’m aware he has no physical conditions. Also seems sane enough. Oh right, and today he told me relatives get visiting day once every few months. Like where the hell is he, juvie? Some troubled youth center? It’s weird.” Andrew laughed to himself, creating a mental image of a faceless Neil behind bars.

Renee stood straighter “Yikes. Yeah, not your everyday boarding school that’s for sure.”

“I don’t know what he’s into, but at least he keeps me entertained so. I’ll keep him around. Romantic emotions are for fairytales.” he said, throwing his cigarette on the floor and stomping it out.

Renee gave him a sad look “Don’t give up yet Minyard!” she shouted after him as he got up and started walking away.

Andrew grinned and threw his signature salute at her. “See you later, Walker.”