Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

-Lux-

--

Luxanna Crownguard’s life had always been orderly, planned, and meticulously shaped for the best. From the moment she was born, her course on life was set. Born to the rich Demacian Crownguard family, her status was secured by rite, and that had been very apparent to her growing up.

Hers was a path always known, she would grow up, study at the prestigious University of Demacia, venture into politics like her parents, and eventually marry a man so she could foster the next generation of Crownguards who would do the same, leading Demacia and fulfilling their duty.

What exactly that duty was, Lux hadn’t really figured out. According to her parents her duty was to strengthen their family with a rich marriage and have kids to continue their legacy. According to her brother, her duty was to help the people of Demacia, and it was his as well. Plenty of others tried to tell her what her duty was, her aunt, her teachers, anyone who heard the name “Crownguard” would eventually start ranting about duty or honor or some other crap.

By modern definitions, it was a perfect life. She was rich, had a big family, access to education and entertainment, she should’ve been happy. But… she wasn’t. Not really at least. Something never felt quite right, something always felt missing. Sometimes the feeling would strike her heart, flaring up whenever her parents mentioned a husband, or creeping in when Garen talked about how her kids and his kids would play together.

And so eventually she came to a conclusion. Control. Control was what she always lacked; her parents controlled everything about her orderly, perfect life. So, when Luxanna graduated high school and it was time for her to go to the prestigious University of Demacia, she took control.

For the first time in her life, she defied her destiny, and chose a new one that could begin at Piltover Academy. Every person in the world must’ve heard about Piltover Academy at some point, it was the height of modern academia, touting fields of science, literature, arts, political study, everything and anything that could be learned.

She told her parents she wouldn’t be going to the University of Demacia, and wanted to study at Piltover Academy, and their reaction was… a little less than controlled. Father was furious, and her mother started with her ranting and freaking out over “How they hadn’t raised her right” the kind of thing you expect from your own parents. But eventually, thanks to Garen and Tianna’s interference, she was allowed to travel to Piltover to study, under the condition that she study Political Science, and return to Demacia as soon as she graduated.

So, with a heavy heart, and her ambitions ahead of her, Lux set out to-

“Ughh… no that’s not right either.”

Lux read over the page again, just to be sure. Yep, too weird. Why she had tried to make this attempt sound like the start of a YA fantasy adventure, she didn’t know. This wasn’t a fantasy, it was just her life. It wasn’t adventurous, or daring, or filled with blonde assassin women who are bland yet somehow the object of affection for multiple conventionally attractive guys.

This was her life. A life of orderly conduct, appeasing her parents, and doing what she was told. At least that part of the story was true. But she did manage to tell her parents off and attend Piltover Academy, she was pretty proud of that part.

For the 5th time she crumpled up the piece of paper and lobbed it into the trashcan, missing by about a foot, pulled out her laptop and opened the homework instructions.

Who are you? Tell me about yourself so we can work together for this semester.

That’s what the instructions said, and boy was she displeased with them. Who are you? That was just too vague. Was it supposed to be a simple paragraph about her interests, or was it supposed to be an award-winning autobiography that would win her prizes? And how are you supposed to make a life like hers interesting?

She was born to Pieter and Augatha Crownguard, was coddled every second of her life, and never had any friends the end. Well, not any real friends at least. Sure, there were plenty of other rich children she had interacted with, and they were mostly pleasant enough. Nothing lasting though, nothing permanent. Even here in Piltover over the three semesters before this one, the girls she spent time with were barely friends, just other rich girls who seemed to like her and bring her along to places. No real connections.

She let out a sigh, looked at her notepad and chose the easy way out.

My name is Luxanna Crownguard, and I’m 21 years old. I was born and raised in Demacia but am studying abroad here in Piltover to pursue political science. This is my 4th semester. My hobbies include reading, writing, photography, and playing volleyball. I look forward to taking this class.

It was better than nothing, she guessed. Who even assigned homework like this before the first day of class? Well, it technically wasn’t due till the end of the week, so her professor was probably going to assign it tomorrow, but… Lux had a habit of doing things soon and doing things right. Even if that meant doing her homework before the first week even started.

Welp, it was the only homework she knew about so far, so she was off to a good start. It was getting pretty late anyway, she would need time to wake up, shower, and prepare herself for the first day. Her first class was going to be Civil Engineering, and was at 11, with someone named Professor Viktor. According to rate my professor, people liked him, but he tended to rant about strange topics a lot and would often end up missing his class due to health complications. It was probably going to be fine. Probably.

Regardless, she stood up from her computer chair, had a biiig long stretch, and trudged over to the bed. Phone alarm set for 7am, did her evening stretches, had a nice glass of milk, and off to sleep.

The next moment she found herself alone in void, like a dark sea that stretched out in every direction, a mix of blues and purples. She felt… strange. Maybe strange wasn’t the right way to put it, but everything felt really hot, but not like she was in a hot room, or outside in the summer. Like she was hot on the inside, in a way she couldn’t make go away. Not just hot but restless too, her whole body was ablaze with electric sensitivity. There was someone else near her? A girl maybe? Hard to say for sure. Then suddenly a black crow was sitting in front of her, eyes twitching back and forth, like it was afraid someone was watching them. it cawed at her a few times, then flew away. Was it… important somehow? She tried to reach out to it, but the girl was stopping her. Her hands felt nice on her arm, cool somehow, but hot in an all too different way. She was leaning in to speak, her breath was warm, brushing past Lux’s ear. Sound began to croak from her lips. She said-

BEEP… BEEP BEEP BEEP… BEEEEP… BEEP BEEP BEEP…. BEEEEEEP.

Lux shot upwards, sweat dripping off her head. From her dorm window light was starting to poor through the closed blinds, filling her room with an ethereal orange glow. What… what the heck just happened? She reached a hand down, brushing fingers over her covers. They were practically soaked from sweat. Eewugh. Kind of gross but, made sense in a way. She must’ve been dreaming but… what about? Hmmm… Gosh she couldn’t remember. There was a bird, that much was for sure. Hmm… oh well.

No point in doting on such a random occurrence, today was her first day of the semester, and it was going to go perfectly. This semester she was really going to do it, she was really going to make a change. Meet new friends, learn new things, study… poli sci… yeah that one was… that one was less than enthusing but it didn’t matter. This next half a year was hers, and if life tried to change that she would just strangle life back into the reigns because this was her year. Nothing she didn’t like, nothing she didn’t want, and nothing that was chosen for her.

All things considered; her morning routine supported this theory.

She had a pretty nice lone dorm room with some basic cooking supplies, enough to warm a bagel and spread cream cheese on it. Then a glass of orange juice for the vitamin c, and she was in the shower. Hair care came next, the specific brands she knew worked well for her hair, not that it was very difficult to work with… regardless, it would stay soft and keep its golden luster she’d so often been praised for. Next came body wash, that was easy, then out of the shower and onto brushing her teeth. Then a quick dry, her morning stretches, and next her outfit.

Right… She hadn’t gotten an outfit ahead of time. Ok ok no biggie, she still had… 3 hours before the class started. Oh… wow… she had overestimated on time a bit. Th-That was fine though, she could juuust… OH, take a walk around campus, yeah, that would be fun, and it was a lovely late summer's day. Hehe, looks like it worked out just as she wanted anyway, go Lux! Oh, and she could even bring her Camera and take some pictures, get a head start on her photography work. Assuming it called for… outdoor shots and all. Either way it would be great.

Great, now to pick an outfit. Well, it was the first day of classes, so formality seems appropriate. Yep, something casual but still enough to shout, I’m here, I’m a scholar, and I’m a responsible woman who knows what she’s doing. What would match that description… hmm… aha! A simple pink pleated skirt Aunt Tianna had bought her, very flashy. And a nice shoulderless white sweater that was breathable and perfect for the transition from summer to autumn. And to top it off… some cute white knee socks, and a pair of black flats. Yep, classy but casual, and ready to totally own the day. She carefully affixed her trademark white hairband, grabbed her backpack and camera bag, and set out for the day.

Her dorm was pretty much what you’d expect for a rich student from another nation, fancy expensive and filled with other rich fancy and expensive students. And sadly, the only people she had made acquaintance with, mostly a few girls she’d met in her intro to poli sci course. They were… kind of rude to most people… but they were nice with her, so… well they kind of sucked but it was better than being alone so oh well?

Thankfully, none of them seemed to be around at the moment, so with a sigh of relief she strolled to the elevator and headed to the first floor. From the 7th. Yeah, she kind of hated being on the 7th floor to be honest but hey, what can you do? After far too long in the stuffy metal death box, she escaped out of the death box, and nearly sprinted through the lobby to get outside.

The campus of Piltover Academy. It was beautiful to say the least. Lush grass and gardens that connected with a mix of old, cobbled roads and bronze walkways, and trees to make shade, and conveniently set up fantastic photo backdrops. From all sides you could see the towering buildings of academia, places where famous scholars had learned, brick and mortar, metal and stone, a modern marvel in itself. She wanted to take a photo right away, but she didn’t really have anyone to ask for a model so, some candid shots of students and other academics would be good. It’s not like she was gonna post these or anything so, it was probably fine.

She made her way across the fine and scholarly grounds, doing her best not to get in the way of any of the other hurried students going about their business. Even from the ground level she could tell Piltover was a melting pot of culture. She could see different affectations and cultures, Piltover, Demacia, Noxus, Bilgewater, Shurima, Targon, Ionia, even people from the Freljord all mixed together. All sorts of different races and people, Humans, Yordles, Vastaya, oh it was just perfect. Anything was better than Demacia though, same clothes, same ideals, blah blah blah. Now this, this was culture.

And… Lux fit into none of it. Sure, she could tell there were other Demacian students around, but they were… from a different class of family she supposed? Pretty much every person of her station who intended to study did so in Demacia itself so the Demacians here were mostly workmen, scientists, or political ambitionists who wanted outside perspectives. That was technically what she was but, not really.

At the very least it made for an interesting perspective for photos, and she was on the hunt. Hmm… There was some Vastaya girl talking with a human, looked kind of boring. An argument, maybe between a couple? No, that was too personal. Aha!

Just ahead of her sitting at one of the benches under a tree were two men, both wearing smart outfits consisting of nice pants, shirts and vests, and matching ties. One was pretty tall, objectively handsome, tan skin and short hair. The other was a lot different; he seemed a bit frail actually, pale skin pulling across a thin frame with messy brown hair, and a crutch sat next to him.

They were laughing while taking sips of coffee and bites of what appeared to be breakfast sandwiches. It was… really nice. Not just from a wholesome perspective, the angle was really great too. This would be great. She got into position, lined up her shot aaaand… Blamo. Normally she’d try and get a few more but, honestly It looked great. Two men, one had his arm around the other’s shoulders, laughing while they ate together. She’d call it… close friends.

Welp, that was the photo she wanted, now she had… two hours and 15 minutes to walk around before class… yikes. Maybe… maybe she would just go sit on a bench and read. Yeah that was a better Idea.

Eventually, after pumping another two hours reading into her latest novel, it was finally time for her classes to start. Lesson learned, take an extra hour or two of sleep on Monday. Regardless, it was finally time for… Civil Engineering. Ughh… gosh as if politics wasn’t boring enough, now she needed to look at sewers and stuff? Well… Maybe it could be kind of fun, she’d have to see. Right, you got this Lux. The class is two hours long, and all the reviews said this professor was great. Yeah, everything will be fine… totally fine.

--

The classroom wasn’t too hard to find, second floor of a building she had a class in the previous semester. She was about 15 minutes early, and only one other student was inside, a guy a bit younger than her. She scanned the room for an ideal desk (yes it mattered) and found one in the middle row right column. A reasonable desk if you asked her. She brought out her notepad, laptop, the dumb “Who am I” assignment, her pencil case, her water bottle, and just in case, an extra pencil. Just in case. She was totally prepared.

Slowly the other students entered, a pretty mixed bag in terms of clothes, lots of casual less formal, some formal less casual. She was just scoping out what she’d be working with you know it’s not like… it’s not like she was nervous no this was just… this was a normal thing she did.

Ok she wasn’t dumb enough to think that was normal, but it was force of habit! Reading via station and clothing was the world she’d lived in, and only recently did she realize that isn’t how every other person in the world operates, and only snobby people do that. Well, she wasn’t a snob, so she understood it wasn’t good practice now.

Satisfied with victory in her internal argument, Lux did manage to relax just a bit. It would probably be fine. She was a star student, most profs loved her. This would be a breeze.

“Viktor, are you sure you’re okay? I can help-”

“Jayce please you don’t have to carry me around campus I can walk. Come on, I’m fine.”

Lux’s head perked up at the sound of familiar laughter. She turned her head to look and… A tall man with tan skin and dark hair was towering over his companion, a thin lanky man leaning on a crutch…

The… the guys she took a picture of?

“Alright Alright, I’m sorry.” The taller one spoke. “Hey, are we meeting up for Lunch at two? I’ve got pasta for two in the breakroom fridge.”

“Sure sure, now go go, I have a class to teach.”

A class to teach… was this…?

The lanky figure walked in, leaning on the crutch, until he found his way towards the desk at the front of the classroom. She noticed now, his right leg had a brace on it, apparently allowing him decent mobility with his aid. He seemed… nice. He looked a little worse for wear in truth, but something about him seemed so genuine. He picked up a piece of chalk and started to write on the board in front of the class, muttering something under his breath. He turned around with one more swing of the crutch, and with the hand holding the chalk addressed the class.

“Good morning, everyone. Welcome to Civil Engineering. My name is Professor Viktor, and I’ll be your instructor for this course. I figured we would begin with a brief explanation of the course, a syllabus rundown, and then I’ll tell you about your finals. I know I know day 1 right, why are we talking about finals. But it’ll make sense, I promise. Now let’s do attendance. Frankly I don’t really care if you come or not, but if you don’t make sure you get the notes from a friend. I get we all have weird schedules, so if you have to miss a few classes don’t bother emailing me, I’m fine with it. But I do have to do it on campus policy, it just won’t affect your grade or anything. Ok, let's start attendance.”

He set the chalk down and walked to the desk, picking up a paper and looking up with beady tired eyes.

“Vred Anders? Ok Vred I see you good good. Eh also, if you want me to call you something else, just say so, I’ll make a note, so I use the right one. Jason Arok? Ah yes, Mr. Arok I had you last semester, right? Right ok, nice to see you again.”

Hmm… well he was unique, that was true. He seemed down to earth at least, if not a little eccentric.

“Luxanna… Crownguard? Is that right?”

“Here sir! B-But you can call me Lux.” Lux raised her hand and spoke a little too loud. Viktor nodded and added a note to the paper.

“Lux, you got it. That’s an interesting name you know. Evokes the imagery of light, eh?”

“Uh, yes professor… sir.”

“Ok, hold on. No one here needs to call me sir, let me say. I mean I’m only 31 and you all are in your early 20’s? I’m not that much older than you c’mon. Not to call you out Miss Crownguard.”

“Right sorry s- professor.”

Viktor gave her an amused smile and continued onwards. Gods how could she be so embarrassing!? All she had to say was here, that was it. Uggh come on. Ok, it was ok, that was an acceptable situation, she just needed to really refocus and stuff. Yep, no more surprises.

“Eh… Jinx?” Professor Viktor called.

…

“Is there a Jinx here?”

Silence. Hmm, she scanned the crowd just to be sure. Not a soul raised their hand.

“Hmm, no Jinx. And on day one too, yeesh. Moving on then.”

The rest of attendance droned on, pretty much the same for everyone else. Call name, here, call name, actually my nickname is X, actually I go by Y, until they finally made it to the end.

“Good, now to get started here why don’t we-”

As he spoke the door swung open, somehow impossibly loud, drawing every head over to it.

Pale skin. Long long blue braids. A blank tank top sporting a Pentakill logo, ripped blue jeans with fishnets visible beneath. A pair of black combat boots clicked forward, supporting her thin wolfish form. On top a slouchy black hat sat, her braids peeking out from behind and swinging down her back. Her right arm was littered in Tattoos, a series of blue smoky clouds with bullet casings falling around them. To top it all a pair of deep pink eyes sat above her crooked nose, and as they passed over the desks of the room those eyes almost seemed to glow.

She strutted in, hunched over, shutting the door behind her with a boot. She walked across the front row of desks, over to the right side of the room. Lux looked around with a realization. The only open desk was… right next to her.

The girl followed her destined trail, turning hard and making to Lux’s adjacent wall, dropping a raggedy looking satchel to the ground with a thud, before plopping into her seat, legs spread out and leaning back on the plastic chair, much to the displeasure of the student behind her.

“I’m guessing you’re Jinx?” Professor Viktor asked, apparently unbothered by a stereotypical high school delinquent stalking into his classroom.

“That’s me.” There was a low, almost sing-songy tone in her voice.

“Ah good, you’re just in time then. We were just about to go over the basics of the course. Now as we start, I’m going to pass out the syllabus, and we can explain the kind of stuff we need to do here. Let’s start with-”

Jinx.

Her name was Jinx.

What kind of a name was that?

Who even was this girl? Among the people on campus no one really dressed like that. I mean maybe like ripped jeans, or a tank top yeah, but this was like the kind of stuff you stop wearing in high school. At least… from what she’d read about public schools. Her posture was atrocious, laid back and uncaring, like her spine was a slinky falling backwards. Her legs and arms seemed longer than they actually were, and her lithe, long fingers were pulling out a mess of random papers onto her desk.

Lux felt… warm. Like it was suddenly very hot in the room. Maybe they had turned the heaters on… at the end of summer. Jinx got her papers in “order” , leaned back down to her bag and rustled there for a few moments. Lux just stared at her.

“Shit…” She muttered under her breath, sitting up, and putting a finger to her chin.

Just then her eyes moved to Lux, and suddenly caught her eye contact. Those pink eyes went wide, and then a grin creeped onto her face. Was Lux blushing?

“Hey blondie?” She whispered.

Lux was frozen in place. What was this weird situation? Why was she so paralyzed? Some random punk looking girl had sauntered in like she owned the place, sat down with the manners of a dog, and was looking right at her now. And Lux was just starting.

“Blooondie… c’mon you’re looking right at me. Hello?”

Lux finally seemed to gain control of her body. She used it in the most appropriate way for the moment.

“Me?”

Wonderful. What a way with words she had. It would’ve been fine if this girl wasn’t… weirding her out so much.

“Uhhh yeah you. We’ve been looking at each other for like 5 seconds now. Lend me a pencil?”

You…

You can’t be serious.

Of course, she needed a pencil, of all the people she had seen today, this would be the one who needs to borrow a pencil.

“Umm… here.” Lux said, handing the one in her hand to Jinx.

“Heey thanks, I owe you one.” Jinx winked and began to absently doodle on the syllabus that had just been passed to her.

Lux’s heart skipped a beat. Gosh this was… she didn’t know what it was to be honest. Annoying? Confusing? All of the above? Who the heck did this girl think she was? Just walking in and, being all weird and stuff and taking her pencil?

Lux liked to be in control. And right now, she didn’t feel very in control. Which, she recognized was a bit silly, but still she was frustrated. Also… curious? Maybe she was being too quick to judge, they had literally only interacted once in the 2 minutes since Lux had first seen her… Oh gods, why was she acting like this?

The rest of the class was much of the same. Professor Viktor went over the course, its details, and some other things that honestly Lux totally missed. She was too busy… being weird. Well, no she wasn’t being weird Jinx was being weird. And it was making her feel weird. Ugh it was all very weird. She was so distracting, her movements were jagged and uneven, often she would lean into one direction only to seemingly lose her balance and swing back the other way to equilibrium.

Eventually the class came to an end though, and the professor dismissed the group. Jinx tossed her loose papers into her satchel, stuffed Lux’s pencil into her pocket, and made for the door.

…

Wait…

Lux’s pencil!

Lux struggled with her books, notes, and laptop, eventually getting them into her bag before taking off after Jinx. She pushed into the hall now filled with students and looked left and right fast. Surely someone like her must stick out in a crowd, right? Right…

Bingo, there she was, blue hair peeking through the crowd. Lux pushed through the sea of people, budging, and swerving till she finally could reach out, get a hand on her shoulder and then…

It was a dude. He had a beard and blue hair. Lux almost screamed in frustration. Almost. She looked around again, until she saw her actual target, same outfit, and braids for sure this time, walking down the stairs of the building. She chased again, moving as swiftly as her clumsy self-could, running down the stairs and finally bursting out onto the campus grounds. She was dead ahead, just a quick distance further and…

Her hand hit Jinx’s shoulder with a thud, causing the girl to turn around with surprise in her eyes, almost jumping away from Lux.

“The fuck?”

Lux went to speak, but unfortunately, she was a bit winded. Only a croak came out at first.

“Uhhh…”

Before Jinx could say another word, she held up a finger to wait, catching her breath while also now leaning onto Jinx’s shoulder. Gods her chest hurt, she hadn’t done much exercise since Volleyball in high school. Eventually though, she managed to get her voice back.

“Pencil….” She spoke in a deep exhale. Jinx however just stared. “You… still have my pencil.”

Jinx’s eyes spurred a myriad of emotions after those words, first ranging confusion, next surprise, and then amusement.

“You, you really chased me all the way out here from that classroom for your fucking pencil?”

“Y-Yes…”

That wasn’t weird right?

Jinx just grinned and reached a hand into her pocket, pulling at the pencil with a little flipped flourish before handing it towards Lux.

“If you wanted it back that badly you should’ve just told me, ya know, when I asked for it.”

“That… that does make sense… huff huff”

“Geeze, talk about dedication blondie. Could you uh- could you let go of my shoulder now?”

“OH right! Sorry!”

She ripped her hand away and took a step back, her facing turning hot from the embarrassment. Now standing face to face like this, she was really able to get a better look at her.

Jinx stood a good 3 inches over her, putting her somewhere around 5’4” or so, although with her slouch forward she looked a lot shorter, just over her own height. Her eyes were that deep, swirling pink, but there was more to it than that. Two heavy bags hung from those pretty eyes, giving a permanent scowl and general creepy vibe to her, even her smile. Spidering out from those same eyes came little blue veins, visible for some odd reason, pushing out to her temple and then fading back to where you couldn’t really see them. That was… odd to say the least.

Her face was thin and soft, almost cute rat-like features, and her nose sat crooked, pretty obviously broken the same way more than a few times. Her lips looked uncharacteristically soft, compared to the rest of her appearance. Like the kind that would probably feel like a pillow to kiss. Lux wasn’t sure why that was the thought that came upon her, but she was stuck with it now.

From her visible arms you could see a myriad of scars that littered her skin, as well as the sleeve of cloud and bullets on her right that seemed to travel onto her torso as well. Across her nose and dotted around her shoulders were freckles, small little spots that added a bit of color to her otherwise ghastly skin. It was… kind of cute actually. Really pretty.

She seemed pretty fit, not buff but the type of girl who could probably handle herself. A necklace with a bullet casing hung from her neck, right above a necklace with what appeared to be a preserved crow skull. That was oddly familiar. She wasn’t exactly sure why though.

“Bloondie? Hello, mission control to blooooondie.” Jinx was talking, in that same kind of sing songy voice.

“Huh?”

“Don’t huh me dude, you’re staring at me. Something you gotta say, or am I just your type?”

…

“N-No, sorry.”

“Mm makes sense. I don’t really do prissy either. Welp, good to meet you, blondie. Now I’ve kind of got a date with my lighter soooo… bye.”

Without another word Jinx spun on her boot heel and skulked off, hands in her pockets. That was… weird on a level you really just can’t explain. It took her a minute or two to shake her out of whatever funk Jinx had put her in. So strange…

Just then the bell marking 1 PM rang. Crap, she had other classes! Lux took off, a bit shaken but still ready to take on the rest of the day.

--

The bar and restaurant ambience Lux sat in at the moment was a little jarring. When Marcie, one of her “friends”, had explained this place it was supposed to be a classy dinner place, and from a certain point of view it was. Except for the dance floor in the middle, the bar serving a bunch of college students, and the loud music being played. Yep, totally classy. She really didn’t even know what she was here, why she agreed to Marcie’s dinner invite in the first place. Maybe she was just lonely, maybe she wanted to shake her jarring meeting with Jinx from the start of the day.

But regardless, when she got the text reading “Heeey so me n the girls r going to this place called Starlight-in, it’s really classy and tasty, you wanna come girl?” She replied yes. Even though she wanted to go home and hide under the covers to ignore this warm feeling in her core that refused to go away

And now here she sat, with a bunch of pretty dolled up rich girls ready to spend their parents’ money for their own enjoyment. Not like Lux was any different.

It was a pretty boring dinner to be honest, despite being back from break the 5 girls she came with seemed to be spouting the same 18 stories they told last semester. Same girls bugging them, same guys they were fu- sleeping with, and the same people they were mad at. It was totally, and horribly boring.

She must’ve scanned the entire restaurant over 15 times now, eyes scrolling desperately for some kind of-

Pale skin. Blue Braids. A black beanie.

Jinx.

The heat inside her swelled again.

She must’ve just come in; she was sitting at the bar. Her and the bartender were talking, too far away to hear anything. Looks like she was drinking. Wait, drinking on a Monday night? Of course, Jinx would, who was she kidding.

“Ummm Lux? You listening?”

She snapped her head back towards the girls, her face going flush.

“Y-Yeah, yeah sorry I just got distracted by something.” She said, trying to sink under the table and hide. Obviously, it didn’t work. All 5 of the girls followed where her gaze was locked, and all 5 suddenly snapped their heads towards her at once.

“Jinx?” The rich girl Hydra spoke in unison.

Oh, gods they knew her.

“How the hell do you know Jinx?” Marcie hissed.

“W-We just have a class together, that’s all. Why?” Lux spoke with a wary breath.

“Jinx is pretty much like, the worst person on campus.”

“Ugh isn’t she? She always crashes parties and drinks us dry. Not to mention she’s practically high all the fucking time.”

“Right? God she’s such a whore too, I heard she slept with Carin, the bartender here, because he’s got a shimmer hookup. Like eww right he’s so gross. Are your drugs worth that ugly dick?”

“Eww, that’s nasty. I heard the only reason she goes here is cause her sister is fucking some rich detective.” The hydra shot gossip back and forth, faster than Lux could follow.

Surely that wasn’t true right? Jinx was kind of weird, and a bit brash but that was too mean. Even if some of those things were true, that was no reason to do this to her. Ugh, why did she come with these girls, they were the worst. She’d much rather have dinner with Jinx than these girls, at least Jinx would probably make her laugh.

…

Without another thought, she stood up with her things, and started walking the edge of the restaurant towards the bar, ignoring the prattling warning behind her. She felt pretty cool, she wouldn’t lie. Except… except now she was hella nervous. Something about Jinx made her heart just go faster, get more anxious. Maybe it was her whole aesthetic, I mean she was kind of intimidating. That must be it.

Her heart threatening to escape her throat, Lux made her way to the seat next to Jinx and sat down without a word.

“Hey there, miss, what can I get for you?” The bartender, Carin she guessed, asked.

“Oh uhm, maybe just some water?”

Carin gave her a strange look but nodded, quickly filling up a glass with ice and handing it over. She took a sip and turned to Jinx, ready to start the conversation.

“Hey, so we-” Lux started, but stopped when she saw the other girl.

Jinx’s face was in her arms, one hand wrapped around a brown glass bottle labeled Tahm Kench’s hard lemonade, hard cherry flavored. She hadn’t even noticed Lux had sat down. Gods dang it.

“Jinx? Hey Jinx.”

No response. Okay… okay no this was fine, no issue. She was totally in control of this situation. Hmm, there was an easier way to handle this. With a little smile she moved a hand over and flicked Jinx on the temple.

“Fuck!”

Jinx shot up like a bullet, head flopping back and legs nearly going with. An inch further and she totally would’ve thrown herself off the side of the high-top chairs. Goodness, talk about a freak out.

“Gosh, I’m sorry I didn’t mean to startle you. I was just trying to get your attention”

Jinx finally righted herself into position, somehow not spilling a single drop of her booze, and made eye contact with Lux. Her eyes were… different. Her irises were that gorgeous pink before but now… it was like her whole eyes had a hue of pink. And those blue veins you could see peeking around her eyes… those were kind of pink too. What… what was that?

Jinx just stared at her blankly for a few moments, pupils dilated and wide.

“Uhm… Jinx?”

As if finally understanding she was there, Jinx’s eyes seemed to stop focusing on nothing and on her. That same weird grin crept onto her face.

“Ooh it’s blondie. Wassup blondie? I didn’t know you came here.”

Her voice was different. At class it was sharp, edged but playful, like a dog who might bite you for play. This was empty. Well empty wasn’t the right word, but it was devoid of real cohesion or understanding. Like her brain was acting like it normally would, at a delayed pace and as if someone had copied the process down with a few wrong steps.

It was Jinx but just… wrong.

“Jinx what’s wrong? You don’t seem uh… I don’t know. Yourself?”

Genuine worry was filling her chest. This really didn’t sit well with her.

“Uh what? Sorry Blondie you’ve spent about 2 fucking hours in a room with me. Don’t start acting like you know me.”

Okay. That wasn’t really the response she was looking for and it was kind of pissing her off. Majorly. The Luxanna Crownguard from the night before probably wouldn’t have done what she was about to do. And she wasn’t really sure why she did it either way. Even just in knowing her for a short amount of time Jinx made her do dumb things. She was just that kind of… aggravating. The kind that makes your whole body feel hot and your heart skip a beat in frustration.

“Excuse you? I’m just trying to check on you because I’m worried. I’m being nice.” It was a bit harder than she intended.

“Oooh you’re being nice huh? Save it, I don’t need some rich bitch’s fake charity. Don’t think I didn’t see you hanging out with the plastic polycule over there. You’re here to say some mean shit to me and leave, as if you dumbasses think anything you can say would ever make me in any single way feel a single emotion besides pure annoyance. Step off.”

…

“If that isn’t the rudest, most presumptuous, and honestly most poorly crafted thing you could’ve said. You don’t know me. You’re just assuming I’m coming to be mean to you?”

Jinx pursed her lips and tapped the tip of the bottle to her head as if thinking through an equation. She reached her answer, pleased, and re addressed Lux with a big smile.

“Uh… fuck off.” She said with her biggest smile.

Ugh. She was dumb to even assume Jinx would be nice. Even if they were a bunch of bullies, those girls were onto something at least. Jinx was the worst.

“Fine, I just wanted to say hello, but obviously I’m not welcome. If you didn’t want to talk to me, you should’ve just said so this morning.”

“Duly noted, enjoy your night Blondie.” She took another sip of her drink.

“My name isn’t Blondie, It’s Lux.” She doubted she looked very intimidating but she would say her peace dang it.

“Lux. Lux Lux Lux Luxie Luxie… Luuuuux. Lux. Ok got it. Have a good walk home Blondie.”

“Ugh!”

Without another word she stomped off out of the bar, all the way back to campus. She realized later while laying in bed she didn’t pay for her dinner, but she really didn’t care. Her mind was focused on something else. Or rather, someone else.

Jinx.

Jinx.

Uggh she was infuriating. All Lux did was try to say hi, and she just started saying mean things for no reason!

And what was up with her? The Jinx from that morning was energetic, kind of quirky in a way that makes your heart kind of beat faster. Like, cute or whatever in a puppy dog kind of way. But the way she acted at the bar was… Just awful. And her eyes? That didn’t seem any kind of okay.

Whatever, it didn’t matter. She only had to see Jinx three times a week anyway. She would just make sure she sat far away from Jinx next class and didn’t engage with her at all. That’s clearly what Jinx wanted. So fine, that’s that.

Her back hit the bed as she ended her nightly routine in frustration, staring up at the ceiling of her dorm.

Jinx.

Jinx…

The way she moved was so… unique.

Her face was… cute.

Her voice was… nice.

Why did she feel so hot again?

…

…

Oh. Yeah, that would… that would explain that. Fine, she was still super mad at Jinx and for an unrelated reason to Jinx she needed to handle herself. That was a totally normal thing people did, everyone needed to deal with their own personal needs.

To save herself the shame, she did her best to forget the name that left her lips that night.

Chapter Text

-Jinx-

--

Jinx’s life, up to this point, had always been riddled with chaos, misfortune, and instability. A life like hers, rife with trauma, fear, and violence, it’s expected that a person raised in such an environment might perhaps have some mental troubles other people might not have to face or challenge.

While the story is somewhat unclear, from what I understand Jinx and her older sister Violet were orphaned at a young age during the Northside Bridge Riots for Zaunite Independence that occurred nearly 17 years ago now, where their father and mother were rioters. Soon after, Jinx and Violet lost their adoptive father in an accident, and Violet served a 7-year Jail sentence for an unrelated incident. Around the time Violet was released from prison, Jinx’s legal guardian at the time, whom I was quite close to, also passed away, leaving the two sisters together and in one household as of current.

There are a number of problems that this life of extreme strife has brought upon Jinx. I believe in my personal experience she’s exhibiting signs of Borderline Personality Disorder, Posttraumatic Stress Disorder, Extreme Depression, Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder, and various other unidentified mental complications that may or may not be a result of her transition from male to female in an unstable environment.

It is for that reason that I, as her clinically assigned health advisor, would ask that she is not punished for her actions in any way that might inhibit her studies at the Academy. Though her actions resulted in a large sum of property damages to be covered, Jinx is not to blame, and I do not believe you should punish this bright young mind for the things that plague her poor psyche.

Please take my medical advice into consideration, and I look forward to hearing what the Academy Board decides on the issue.

--

It had been just over half a year since her and Vi had to chalk up about 1000 bucks to get some bunk medical advisor to write this letter. At the time, her second semester attending Piltover Academy, she may have decided to bring her graffiti supplies up towards the campus one night and let those rich fucks know what it really meant to live in this city. It was all going to plan honestly, a big fat mural of the Academy board sucking the dick of an old fat bald dude labeled, Piltover Council. It was pretty fucking cool, buuut then she fell out of a window, broke her ankle, and got caught.

After a bit of deliberation and legal research (Thanks to Vi’s dumb girlfriend) they figured out the only way she could keep attending was if they got a doctor to say she was crazy. It worked to be fair, but it didn’t make Vi any less furious. And, she had every right to be, after all she had spent her life savings to be able to give Jinx this chance, even with her scholarship, only for Jinx to almost throw it all down the river. She really didn’t know what Vi was expecting though, like, it was Jinx. That’s what she did, ruin shit.

The “doctor” had sent them a copy (who fucking knows why) and for whatever reason Jinx hadn’t bothered to throw it out. Instead, it just sat on her dresser, yet another reminder of failure. Of course the dickweed had to blame her insanity on being trans though, old creeper.

Her and Vi had a big fight about it when it happened, whether or not Jinx should even keep going, if it was worth it, money, blah blah blah. In the end they decided she would keep going, get her engineering degree, and then peace the fuck out. And so here she was at the start of a new Semester, doing what she did best.

Ruining Shit.

First day sucked, some weird blonde girl chased her down over a pencil, her truck broke down, she lost the pack of cigarettes she bought, and she ended up missing her first class because she slept in. So, forgive her if she wasn’t exactly “feeling” it that night.

When she got home, the first thing she did was shoot up. There was no hesitation, no second guessing, no real consideration at all. She felt shitty, Vi wasn’t home, she wanted Shimmer, the end.

Man, when you have a shitty day though, that first taste of relaxation is like nothing you’ve ever known. The needle really sucked, to be honest, and the first 8 seconds or so hurt like hell, but when the Shimmer finally hit her nervous system and the happy chemical starting shootin out? Fuck, there was nothing like it.

To be honest she hadn’t really planned to go to Starlight-in, it just kind of happened, probably due to her delayed decision making from being mega high and all that. It was a quick walk away though, so that was nice. Carin greeted her with his dumb smile like always and slid over her favorite no questions asked.

He’d have to be fucking blind to not see she was on Shimmer, but he didn’t say anything, so he probably didn’t care all that much.

She was fine with just forgetting she existed, drinking Tahm’s, letting the Shimmer run its course, just get really lost in dissociation and mental exploration for a few hours.

Until the weird blonde rich girl flicked her in the head.

“Fuck!”

She jerked up and looked around, the flashing lights of the dancefloor nearby blurry and distorted in her eyes. Ohh gods that made her want to barf, she really needed to start wearing goggles when she got high.

“Gosh, I’m sorry I didn’t mean to startle you. I was just trying to get your attention” Blondie said, her bubbly voice kind of anxious in a smooth way. Almost like… Coffee? Warm like it too.

Finally, she managed to turn her attention to the offender. Pencil girl who was way too over it about a pencil but in a kind of cute and endearing way. Despite her out of commission mind, she did her best to remember the details she noted during their last encounter.

Cute face, super sweet and innocent, like a doe. She gives off the high school cheerleader who goes to church and advocates for abstinence vibes, and you know it was really weird, but Jinx was super into that? You just kind of wanted to hug her, maybe kiss her, maybe kiss some other places too… religious girls after all, that’s just another way to say closet freak, and really-

She was getting off topic. Other details besides cute doe eyed look she wanted to ruin:

- Peppy clothes, pink skirt, white sweater that looked real nice on her. Those knee-high socks were cute too, this girl definitely knew she was pretty as well.
- Damn good body, curves for days and some nice fucking tits. Jinx would pay serious money to see what that ass was like. Cute soft looking thighs too. Totally the religious cheerleader who- alright stop it, fucking brain.
- Really schooly type, very organized, probably gets off to guys who read books, lol
- kind of awkward. Like, she had spent half of their class staring at Jinx, which normally would’ve been hot if this girl didn’t have a big sign on her shirt that said, “I AM A STRAIGHY, DO NOT TRY TO GAY”, like seriously this was total daddy’s girl, approved boyfriend, religious cheerleader girl who actually wanted- oh for fuck sakes why was she like this?

And that about summarized what she picked up. Admittedly the backstory she invented of the religious cheerleader seemed to dominate her thought process, along with mostly details about how obviously straight this girl was. Even if she was hella cute, hella hot, and hella hella Jinx’s type.

Oh right, she did say “I don’t do prissy girls” before didn’t she. Well, that was a fucking lie girls like this were the best. What a shame… Oh well, not fucking one cute girl wasn’t the end of the world.

“Uhm… Jinx?” The girl asked.

What? Why was she asking for Jinx that didn’t- that didn’t make sense? She must’ve missed something along the way of the convo… hmmmmm… ok so Jinx said fuck, blondie said sorry, then blondie said “Uhm… Jinx?”. Ooooh yeah there it was, she hadn’t said anything besides fuck.

“Ooh it’s blondie. Wassup blondie? I didn’t know you came here.”

Blondie’s expression changed from curiosity to worry. The fuck? Why was she even-

Jinx’s eyes darted back and forth out of habit, and just happened to land on 5 familiar rich bitch faces on the other side of the room all attentively staring at her and Blondie. Yeaah ok, she understood now. The asshole squad was pissed Jinx refused to sell to them anymore, so they sent over new rich bitch number 6 to pull something on her. Ugh, she couldn’t believe she just admitted Blondie was her type.

“Jinx what’s wrong? You don’t seem uh… I don’t know. Yourself?”

Oh gods fuck off, what a lame excuse to get at her. Even shimmered up she could see right through this shit. Better to just tell her off now so she could get on with her night instead of playing along anymore.

“Uh what? Sorry Blondie you’ve spent about 2 fucking hours in a room with me. Don’t start acting like you know me.”

She wasn’t an idiot. Well, she was, but not that kind of idiot. She wouldn’t fall for something that stupid, no matter how cute this girl was or how genuine she sounded.

“Excuse you? I’m just trying to check on you because I’m worried. I’m being nice.” Now her voice was angry, stinging, still kind of cute in its own way but the frustration in it was real. Not coffee anymore, now she was an espresso.

But man, she was surprised Blondie was still going along with her plan, most of those drug bumming sluts would’ve given up by now.

“Oooh you’re being nice huh? Save it, I don’t need some rich bitch’s fake charity. Don’t think I didn’t see you hanging out with the plastic polycule over there. You’re here to say some mean shit to me and leave, as if you dumbasses think anything you can say would ever make me in any single way feel a single emotion besides pure annoyance. Step off.”

…

“If that isn’t the rudest, most presumptuous, and honestly most poorly crafted thing you could’ve said. You don’t know me. You’re just assuming I’m coming to be mean to you?”

Gods, gimme a break. She was over this shit, blurred words and flashing lights were just pissing her off even more now. Time for an old classic. She put her fakest smile on after pretending to think, turned to Lux, and uttered her most powerful of curses.

“Uh… fuck off.”

Lux’s brow furrowed hard, and her eyes darted up and down for a moment assessing the situation before she started getting herself together and standing up from the barstool she sat at.

“Fine, I just wanted to say hello, but obviously I’m not welcome. If you didn’t want to talk to me, you should’ve just said so this morning.”

“Duly noted, enjoy your night Blondie.” She pulled up her Tahm’s for another sip, praying this girl would finally leave her alone instead of keep retorting her words.

“My name isn’t Blondie, It’s Lux.”

The look on her face was so fucking adorable, she was trying to look all mad and scary and shit, but she was so doe eyed in the first place it looked ridiculous. Hard not to find this girl cute honestly… not that it affected her or anything.

“Lux. Lux Lux Lux Luxie Luxie… Luuuuux. Lux. Ok got it. Have a good walk home Blondie.”

“Ugh!”

Finally pissed off enough at Jinx, Blondie, er… Lux, stomped off from the bar, no doubt to go right back to those dumb bitches and laugh about whatever the fuck. Honestly? It wasn’t worth checking up on. She just turned her eyes back to her drink and kept going while she waited out the shimmer in her system.

It didn’t take too long to even forget that Lux had even talked to her, the relaxation and euphoria pulsing in her head taking far too much of her attention. An hour lost in her own mind turned to two, and two hours turned to three, and finally while staring in the bathroom mirror for… actually she wasn’t sure how long, her high finally came crashing down.

The pink haze filling her eyes had faded now, and the veins around her eyes were no longer obviously pink as shimmer pumped through them. You could still absolutely tell she was a Shimmer user by one glance but, hopefully Vi and Officer Bitch wouldn’t know she’d been on it tonight.

As if just remembering that she had family, she realized she needed to get home before Vi, just to at least have plausible deniability in case they got into another argument. She stumbled her way out of the bathroom that she still wasn’t sure when she entered, threw down a few bills and coins for Carin, and strolled out of the bar.

The walk home wasn’t that bad, and it’s not like she could have driven in the first place. Other people like her might go on about “Oh it doesn’t matter if I’m drunk or high I can drive fine.” and Jinx might’ve said those same words if she were around said people, but she wasn’t dumb enough to actually do it.

Maybe a year or two ago she probably would have actually done it, but now whenever she thought about it, she also thought about Vi. How Vi would react if she got… Yeah…

So long story short, she walked. And it still wasn’t exactly a long walk, just feels a lot quicker when you’re on a shimmer high. With every thud of her boots on the Zaun sidewalks came an internal debate to just fall over and sleep there on the pavement. Honestly, she could get a pretty sweet spot, or maybe even find Ekko’s crew and crash with them. If he wasn’t still pissed at her. Well, he probably was so that wasn’t a great idea.

She was kind of surprised to see Lux in this part of town. She knew it was just because those annoying girls probably brought her here, but she expected a rich bitch like her to totally detest a bar in Zaun. Whatever, not like she would get an answer anytime soon, any potential bridge with Lux had officially been burned, and she didn’t want one anyway.

Finally, she saw her and Vi’s place, and compared to other places in Zaun it was pretty fucking nice. Two floors, a garage, a full kitchen, two bathrooms. Honestly the fact that they could live there was only because of Vi’s bitch of a girlfriend. She still didn’t know why Vi followed around that stupid rich topsider like a dog on a leash, but at the very least they got this house out of it so, what the fuck ever.

Speak of the devil, as she strolled up to the house she noticed Caitlyn’s car was parked against the sidewalk. Oh boy. A quick peek into the garage confirmed that Vi still was not home however, Her truck and Fishbones sat inside, awaiting maintenance, as well as Vi’s bike, but not her car. Still at work then.

After a bit of preparation for her nearly sister-in-law, she trudged through the door, entering their domain.

And there stood Caitlyn, leaning up against the kitchen bar, phone in hands. She looked frustrated for one thing; brow furrowed as her 6 feet of perfect posture looked rigid as a fucking building. Jinx still couldn’t believe that her sister, Vi, with a criminal record and a reputation in Zaun for outsmarting the law, was dating a fucking detective. It infuriated her, but she couldn’t do anything about it, so without acknowledging her, Jinx went for the stairs to her room.

“A hello would be nice.”

Ugh fucking hell.

“I don’t remember inviting you in, so…”

Although they hated each other, Caitlyn and Jinx still managed a somewhat mutual respect. Aka, Caitlyn didn’t throw her in jail and Jinx didn’t try to shoot her. For Vi’s sake.

“Fair enough. Is your sister at work? I’ve been trying to call her all day and she hasn’t said a word.”

“How should I know, I don’t have a GPS on her, unlike you.”

Caitlyn rolled her eyes and just stayed there, tapping her foot. At least she was worried about Vi, not that it made Jinx any more sympathetic. The conversation over, Jinx made her way up the stairs and stumbled into her room. Home sweet mess. Any normal person would probably see her room and say the old shit like “this is a pigsty” or whatever the fuck but Jinx didn’t really give a shit.

She sat down at her computer chair, managing to remove her combat boots, and fired up her PC. Might as well play some games before falling asleep, if she even could. She slid her headset on, and in the process remembered what was in the drawer of this desk. Sliding it open, she stared for a few long seconds at the vials of shimmer that sat next to the needle tool she used to inject it.

Maybe she could… she slowly reached in to grab the needle, snapping her hand back however when she heard the slam of a door downstairs. Vi was home.

Fuck… what am I doing?

Panicked realization hitting her, she shut the drawer as fast as she could and stepped away from her desk. Having it within arm’s reach was a really really bad idea waiting to happen. She needed a drink, anything to take her mind off of it, so she slid out of the door to her room and made for the stairs, however stopped when she heard the voices coming from down below.

“Do you understand how worried I am right now? How scared I am every single night that you might come home with another concussion? That you might not be able to come home at all?” Cait’s voice, pretty damn distressed.

“Oh, so you’re the only one who gets to worry about me? In case you forgot, Cupcake, I’m dating a fucking cop. A fucking cop. Every single day you have to go in, I panic over it, do you understand how scary that is?” Vi’s voice, as pissed as always.

“I have the proper tools to protect myself, and years of experience.”

“Oh so you think 7 years in fucking Stillwater didn’t make me tough enough to handle boxing?”

“You know that’s not what I’m saying, stop twisting my words. I know for a fact that you don’t wear protective gear in your league, or are you going to lie and claim you do?”

…

“That’s what I thought.”

“It fucking pays better so step off.”

“If you need more money, just tell me, I can spare a bit or even ask my paren-”

“No. I’m not taking your crooked parent’s topsider money. And you already pay for part of my fucking house, so don’t even try to give me more, I know you’re budgeting to afford it. And I do fucking appreciate it Cait, but I don’t need any more charity. You should know how it feels to be condescended on by someone with more than you.”

…

“I’m sorry…”

“Yeah. I’m sorry too.”

Yeesh, that didn’t sound fun. She waited out the rest of the discussion before she heard the door swing shut as Caitlyn presumably left the house. She gave it another minute before she crept down the stairs. Vi was standing at the bar in the kitchen, leaning against her arms. She looked… not great. It was obvious her match hadn’t gone as planned, a black eye sat on her scowl, scratches, and bruises visible on her exposed arms, her tank top looking bloodied and stained from putting it on after her match.

Finally noticing her presence, Vi looked up and saw Jinx, giving a weak and tired smile to her.

“Hey kiddo.” She sounded like she was almost going to cry.

“Hey.” Jinx didn’t know what else to say.

“You probably heard all of that, right?”

“More than I wanted to. You… ok?”

Vi cocked her head back and forth before letting a breath out through her nose and shrugged.

“I’ll be fine. Cait’s just pissed I didn’t tell her I was going to be fighting tonight. Well, she’s pissed I’m fighting at all. She just doesn’t get it, y’know.”

“I hear you. Why do you still bother with her?” Maybe that wasn’t the best thing to say. Any other night that would’ve set Vi off. Now though, she just seemed tired.

“Cause I love her? I’ve never met… anyone so connected to me. Sure, we’re fighting right now but we’ll get through it. You’ll understand one day pow-pow.”

“Doubt it.”

“Aww come on Powder. There’s gotta be a special guy or gal, right?” Vi walked towards her and ruffled a calloused hand through her hair.

“Ugh, cut it out loser.”

She tried to break away only for Vi to follow up, chasing after her and trying to wrap her arms around Jinx.

“C’mon kiddo, I need a sister hug right now.”

“Yeah right, in your dreams!” Jinx laughed out.

Jinx tried to cut to the left but Vi’s fighting instincts won out, and she dived in, tackling Jinx to the ground in another laughing fit as the two faux wrestled on the ground.

It was… nice. It made her happy, made her feel like they were kids again. Which only made it worse when Vi finally set her loose and she got back to her room. A few months ago, she had promised Vi she’d stop using Shimmer.

The moment she was alone she hit the ground, too many things flying around her head at once.

You’re a Jinx! Do you hear me?!

It’s all your fault. All your fault.

Vander died because of you. Mylo and Claggor died because of you. Dad died because of you.

No… no no no please… please just stop.

Vi only keeps you around because she pities you, and her girlfriend only tolerates you because Vi makes her. Vi hates you, Ekko hates you, you drive everyone away.

Even today, you had a chance to make a friend, but you drove her away for nothing. She was nice, she was pretty, and you didn’t even give her a chance. And you deserve to be alone.

Shut up, shut up shut up shut up!

…

It took a while but eventually her thoughts went away, and she was left there. Empty. At some point she must’ve crawled into bed and fallen asleep, but she wasn’t really sure when. She also wasn’t sure where the new mark on her arm came from. That might’ve been a lie.

--

The next day passed without much event. She didn’t have class on these days, so she spent the day in the garage tuning her rides. It was pretty damn cathartic to have a whole day to just work on her craft, covered in grease and oil.

Vi even came to help her out for a bit, handing her tools, making small talk, bugging Jinx to stop working on her truck and give Vi’s car a look over. Of course, it was fine, Vi probably just wanted an excuse to talk. She should give Vi less shit… Well that’s what she was thinking until Caitlyn called, and of course, that was more important than sister quality time.

Otherwise, nothing much happened.

The day after… was very different.

--

She strolled into class, not nearly as late as she had been the first day, and her prof gave her a nod as if they were friends. Lux was already here, of course she would be, and so Jinx made the most logical choice. Sitting as far away as possible.

Lux didn’t seem to mind as when she entered, she tried that whole intimidating stare look which just did not work for someone so doe eyed. Why’d she have to be so fucking cute? She’d be easier to hate if Jinx didn’t want to pin her to the wall and ruin her.

Soon enough though, class started.

“Good morning, everybody, hope you’re excited for day two. Now on Monday we talked about how the final project, and every other assignment for the class, is going to be partner or group based. I’m sure some of you were already planning to make groups, but I hate to inform you I’m going to be assigning groups.”

A collective groan escaped the crowd, and Professor Viktor raised a hand to silence them.

“Yes yes, I’m sorry but it has to be this way. We have students from social studies majors as well as STEM majors in this class and for these projects I need every group to have someone at least a little experienced in either field. So, what I’ve done is premade groups of two and three based on your majors. Everyone is going to be given a group that has at least one STEM student, and one Humanities student. Ok? Ok I’m going to go down the list of your groups then.”

Geeze, what a fucking joke. The fact that she was going to have to work with some annoying snobby kid who studied fucking sociology, or some shit made her blood boil a bit. It would be a waste of time, the person she got stuck with would probably just complain to the teacher and make her be alone or some shit. Not that it fucking mattered, she just needed to pass, not excel.

“Alright next group… let us see here… Ah yes. Luxanna Crownguard, and Jinx.”

…

…

You’re fucking shitting me.

Chapter Text

-Lux-

--

Silence. That’s what Jinx gave her, and that’s what Lux decided to give back. Silence.

They were sitting, now, in desks opposite from each other facing directly in, and neither looking well too pleased over it. Jinx was slouched down, eyes half lidded and expression blank, a look almost more apathetic than angry. Displeased and annoyed but nothing more. Lux thought that was very fitting for someone so obviously placed as a delinquent.

Lux, however, was a little more than “annoyed”. She had crossed her arms the moment she sat down, made an expression of disgust towards her unwilling partner, and waited. Jinx said nothing, just stared her in the eye with that bored look painted across her face. So she, in recourse, also said nothing, and that’s how the next 4 minutes or so before Lux could not take another minute of those piercing pink eyes staring through her and needed to act.

“I’m going to talk to Professor Viktor.” She spoke, getting up with a huff and smoothing out her skirt.

“Yeah, figures. I’m gonna go wait outside for the judge’s verdict, and if he sets you free, we can split and act like this didn’t happen. Otherwise, like it or not we’re stuck together Blondie. Lucky you.” She ended her words with a wink that made Lux want to chuck her pencil case directly at Jinx’s head.

With another defiant huff, Lux made her way to the front desk, where the thin frame of Professor Viktor was hunched over his laptop, apparently doing something that required immense focus.

“Excuse me, professor?”

He didn’t seem to hear over the rabble of every other group's discussion, and out of the corner of her eye she caught Jinx leaving the room, just before the door closed, however, throwing the middle finger at Lux. She rolled her eyes as every bit of Crownguard patience she’d spent years cultivating was ripped out by that stupid girl.

“Professor.”

She said it far loudly and far more sternly than she had anticipated, and for a second all other discussion in the room stopped as heads turned towards her.

Oh gosh. Oh geez. That was not what she’d planned on. The professor’s head snapped up in surprise before chatter and voice started to fill the silence she’d accidentally caused. She couldn’t believe she’d done that.

“Ah, Miss Crownguard. Apologies, I was pouring over some research notes on my next project and wasn’t paying attention. What can I do for you?”

She took a moment to breathe and calm herself down from whatever red-faced warmth Jinx’s antics had put into her and spoke as calmly and reasonably as she could.

“S-Sorry for yelling like that, I didn’t mean to it just kinda, slipped out. U-Uhm… so about the groups that you assigned, for the rest of… the semester.” It was even torture letting those syllables leave her mouth. Maybe not as calm or reasonable as she planned.

“Ah, yes. You and Miss Jinx are a pair if I remember. Bright girl, her.”

“Yes well, I don’t want to act like I’m imposing, and I don’t want to be a burden, but I don’t think Jinx and I are going to be a good partnership. I wanted to ask if I could request a different partner or group?”

Professor Viktor did not look incredibly surprised, in fact he sat up and gave her a look that told her all too well in advance where this conversation was headed.

“I’m afraid, Miss Crownguard, that’s not exactly how this works. Often in a real work environment you’ll be paired with someone who you eh… may not exactly agree with totally. But that doesn’t change the fact that you must work with them. Now, if you have a legitimate reason for why working with Jinx would bring down the quality of your work, say a past history involving a serious offense, I could go about changing your group. But can you honestly look me in the eye and say your reasons are anything more than having a dislike of Miss Jinx?”

She let out a sigh and looked down, a bit meekly.

“No, I can’t, professor.”

He gave her a sympathetic smile before sitting up again to speak, a few coughs leaving his throat before he managed his next lecture.

“I understand the situation you’re in, but I want you to know that while Miss Jinx may have a reputation amongst the academy, she’s a bright young soul with a passion for science. You shouldn’t let the opinions, or stigmas, of your peers stop you from seeing her value. Beyond that Jinx is one of very few students and staff of this Academy from Zaun, myself being one of the others, so you can imagine she must feel eh… a little out of place here. I think you’ll find she’ll be a very effective and valuable partner if you give her the chance.”

He… was probably right in at least some ways. In truth she really didn’t know anything about Jinx besides what Marcie and the other girls had told her, and the little she had gleaned from their few conversations. That being that she was a rude, uncaring, rule breaking… ok ok that was the opposite of what the professor had suggested.

“Right… sorry professor. I should be more understanding.”

“You’ve nothing to apologize to me for, as I said I understand your situation. From what I understand Jinx can be eh… a little brash so I’m not exactly surprised. Regardless, you never know what happens when you give someone a chance. One of the most important people in my life was once my academic rival, and I despised him tooth and nail. Now we share lunch every day and take walks on campus together.”

Ah, maybe that was the taller man with Viktor on the bench?

“Sorry to get all preachy on you, Miss Crownguard. Good luck with your assignment, I trust that you and Jinx will be presenting some, eh, excellent work to me.”

“Yes, I’ll make sure of it. Thank you for listening, professor.”

He waved her off and went back to his laptop, gaunt frame pouring over whatever research he had been doing. He was a pretty nice man all things considered, so she should try to take his advice and give Jinx a chance. Idealism renewed; Lux strolled outside the classroom.

Jinx was leaning against a door directly across from their classroom, hands in her pocket, head resting against said door and eyes shut. Ok... second chance, second chance. Just a bit of civility would ease this situation. As she walked out into the hallway Jinx was alerted by the sound of her footsteps and peaked one eye open. Seeing it was Lux, Jinx pushed off the wall and stalked forward to meet her.

“So, what’s the verdict? Is Luxie free to fly away, or is she stuck with the bad girl in town?”

Lux had to bite her lip to stop herself from screaming. Just something about the way she spoke made Lux feel so… ugh. Again, Lux pulled a deep breath that calmed her down just enough.

“Professor Viktor told me we can’t switch partners, so… yeah, I guess we’re stuck together.”

Jinx maintained that apathetic, piercing stare for a moment. She let out a “Hm” and pulled her phone from her pocket before tossing it underhand at Lux.

“Wha-?!”

Lux shot her hands out to try and catch it, and only succeeded in juggling it in the air for a second before dropping it to the ground. Jinx looked thoroughly unimpressed.

“Why the heck did you just throw your phone at me?!”

“Well,” Jinx said “I was assuming you’d catch it, and then you’d put your phone number in since you are, unfortunately, my partner for this class. Which, believe me, I’m just as displeased as you are.”

Civility Lux… Civility.

She leaned down to pick up Jinx’s phone, luckily still open so she didn’t have to ask Jinx to unlock it.

“Right. Ok. I’ll add my contact information. You could’ve just asked me for my phone number though.”

Jinx seemed to play with the idea in her head for a minute before giving a lopsided grin.

“Nah.”

…

Civility…

Civility…

…

“Are you serious right now? Neither of us are pleased about this, but the least you could do is try not to be such uh… such uh…”

“Such a what, Blondie?”

Her hands balled into fists and she took a step forward, right up to Jinx and looking up at her, Jinx of course stood her ground until their faces were only about a foot apart.

“Such a complete, utter bitch! You have 0 respect for anything, that much is clear. You’re rude, and you don’t care that you’re rude, and it drives me crazy!”

There were a few seconds of silence as Jinx’s eyes examined her face up and down, burning heat of frustration and something else in Lux’s cheeks.

“So, I drive you crazy? Thought I already told you prissy girls weren’t my type, Blondie.” Her lips turned back into a grin that highlighted her canines.

…

“I’m done with this.”

Lux turned on her heel and stomped away towards the stairs, realizing only after a few moments that she was still holding Jinx’s phone in her hand. Jinx, apparently not done with this, and probably needing her phone, followed her. Lux didn’t say a word to her, despite Jinx asking both where they were going and for her phone back.

Finally, they were outside of the building and onto campus again, and after power walking out of the entrance, she turned again without warning (almost causing Jinx to collide into her) and thrust the hand holding Jinx’s phone into the other girl’s chest.

“I am going to my room, where I’m going to install the software we need on my laptop and begin working on the plans for our first project. You are going to come with me. And for both of our sake, just don’t say a thing and follow me, or else I might break your phone before you take it back.”

There was a long and obvious moment where Jinx desperately wanted to say something, make some kind of snide, rude comment, but much to Lux’s relief she did not. She simply took her phone back and backed a few steps away.

“Yeah, alright.” Jinx said, “Lead the way I guess.”

That was more like it.

--

The walk back to her room was… interesting to say the least. Jinx didn’t really say much, just walked beside her with that same menacing prowl she walked everywhere with. It must’ve been exhausting if she did it on purpose, but something told Lux that years of walking like that had ingrained it into her.

Her outfit was similar to what she wore during their previous interaction. Black tight jeans ripped with fishnets underneath, a white tank top, only this time Jinx was wearing a loose-fitting black and dark red trimmed leather jacket with fleece lining on the inside. A few patches with designs she didn’t recognize as well as hand painted blue and pink graffiti like images littered over a couple spots, making it at the very least recognizable. It did certainly fit her aesthetic, that was for sure, even if it did look kind of big on her (which was really cute).

Lux felt weirdly underdressed next to Jinx in the jacket, despite the fact that her skirt and sweater were far nicer. She wasn’t sure why she had chosen a very similar outfit to their first meeting as well. Another nice, cute skirt, black this time, a blue sweater with a bit more fabric since it was a tad bit colder that day, white thigh length socks and flats. She noticed the way Jinx’s eyes had trailed her once or twice that first day, although that probably had absolutely no input on why she had chosen these clothes.

They made quite the odd pair walking through the campus, and it wasn’t an exaggeration to say literally every single person or group they walked past looked at them with a strange look. Although since she apparently was a known menace, they were most likely looking at Jinx. Good to know her social reputation was also going to be affected by Jinx.

Well, there was of course one person who didn’t seem to care that Jinx was walking next to her.

“Hey! Lux!” A distinct voice called out from the crowd, and she saw a familiar head of blonde hair bobbing towards them from farther down the campus.

Jinx turned and looked at Lux like she wanted to keel over dead right there. Although, in complete honesty Lux wasn’t exactly enthused either. Finally, all 5 feet and 8 inches of Ezreal slowed down to a jog as he got closer.

“Heey Lux. What’s going on?” He spoke, walking closer as if he’d just now noticed Lux and totally hadn’t sprinted across the entire yard. He wore a simple T-Shirt for some movie Lux had never seen, a pair of trendy red jeans, and canvas shoes to match his… aesthetic.

“Hi Ezreal. Not that much, how about you?”

He waved a gesture that was something like “don’t worry about it” or “who cares” or some other noncommittal, annoying frat boy answer. And he wasn’t even in a frat.

“It’s y’know, cool. Just hanging out, doing my schoolwork, partyin, all that. Hey y’know speaking of parties, there’s this house party at a place outside of town next weekend. W-Were you planning on going?”

She was not.

“Oh well, you know I’m uh… just not sure yet. I’m not really a party girl type.”

“’Oh, well then maybe we could-”

Beside the two of them Jinx cleared her throat, glaring towards them (although it seemed a little more aimed at Ez for some reason.) Admittedly, she was a little more focused on dodging Ez’s date invite at the moment and had forgotten her and Jinx were going to do classwork. That, however, did give her a wonderful opportunity.

“Oh, I’m sorry.” Ezreal said. “I didn’t really notice you. Uh, I’m Ezreal. You are?”

“Yeah, you don’t get to know my name.” Jinx said.

Ezreal looked genuinely confused by her words rather than offended. Before Jinx could escalate it further, she stepped between them.

“Ah, right. Sorry Ezreal this is Jinx, Jinx this is Ezreal. Jinx is my partner for my Civil Engineering Class, and we’re actually going to start setting up our tools for the class so, yeah we have to go, like, right now.”

Ezreal’s eyebrow went up a bit in surprise before he put his hands up.

“Oh, yeah sorry I just kinda barged in and talked to you guys. Alright, good luck with your work. Text me about the party, ok?”

And with that he jogged off with a wave, more than likely for an archaeology class.

Lux let out a visible sigh and let her body sag a little bit. Ezreal was super nice, and really sweet. But he was also… Well, he was just a bit much.

“So what’s the deal with you and horndog twink? You two a thing?” Jinx spoke, reaching into her pocket and pulling out a pack of cigarettes. Clearly, she was unaware of the no smoking on campus rule. Actually, she probably was very aware.

“No, we are not a couple, and don’t be gross and call him a horndog. How do you manage to make everything weird?”

“Some would say it’s a talent I’m born with. I’m quite proud of my weirdness, it’s better than being boring. And I will in fact call him a horndog because he’s totally into you, I mean he was practically drooling over your outfit.” Jinx’s eyes shot up and down Lux at that, and Lux did her best to ignore the warmth in her cheeks when she did it. Stupid Jinx and her stupid gorgeous eyes.

“C’mon, he’s a really nice guy. We’re just friends, and he’s not into me. Maybe this is hard for you to understand, but not everything is about sex.” She said practically lifting her nose up to her crass companion.

Jinx did that thing again where her eyes kind of look up into nothing, and she tosses your words back and forth in her head before responding, the lit cigarette in her mouth sliding back and forth in its position. Once pleased she looked back to Lux and shrugged.

“Whatever, when he gets drunk and starts grinding on you at that party, you’ll see I’m right. Which I am going to as a matter of fact, the party I mean, because what good is a rich campus if you don’t mooch booze off of the rich fuckers who go there.”

Of course Jinx would be going. Her ‘friends’ did say Jinx always drank them dry. Another reason to not go to said party.

“Well, that’s good for you. Let’s stop wasting time, you were the one complaining about being stopped by Ezreal. And stop smoking, you’re not supposed to have them on campus at all, but if you do it in my dorm I’m going to get in trouble.” She continued the walk towards her dorm, and Jinx fell into step beside her right away. To Lux’s surprise Jinx actually put out her cigarette.

There was a tension that had kind of formed now since they had left the class, which was somewhat obvious but now it was getting worse. After Ezreal’s interruption Jinx had elected not to talk anymore, and Lux couldn’t exactly think of anything to say either. Jinx was just… she was just… something about her made Lux bubble up and spill over so damn quickly, in a way just about no one had ever made her do before. Even with Ezreal she’d always been able to act proper and kind. And now, she was left with this awkward silence with the girl who hated her as a consequence for her crimes.

Once they had gotten inside her dorm, they were forced to be a little closer together which only made it even worse. The elevators weren’t exactly large, and they were practically shoulder to shoulder due to there being a few other people. She tried her hardest not to bump awkwardly into Jinx, but it didn’t work, and again being on the 7th floor, they pretty much stopped at every floor before hers. Every moment was an awkward touch, another bump, another shiver, another hitch of her breath. This was torture.

As she was trying to readjust on the fifth floor, a particularly built guy next to her accidentally elbowed her a bit too hard, and in a moment, she lost her footing and was stumbling forward.

Right into Jinx.

She barely had time to even register the fact that she was tripping forward before Jinx reached out, far quicker to react than she had anticipated Jinx to be. Kind of awkwardly, she managed to catch Lux in a half hug, half arm hold, Lux’s hands having pressed into Jinx’s shoulders.

The first thing that hit her was the smell. It was a kind of mix that clung to Jinx, the smell of cigarettes, a kind of earthy forest like smell, and… motor oil. Now if Lux had been told that’s what someone’s scent was like, she would’ve winced and shook her head. But… it was…

It was really good.

The only thing she could really compare it to was as if someone had spilled gasoline in a pile of mulch, which even as she thought about it seemed like it should have been awful. But it wasn’t, not at all. It was strong, kind of overwhelming, distinct in a way that was hard to put into words. Like the jacket, it certainly matched your expectations of Jinx.

The second thing to hit her was the feeling of Jinx’s hands grasping at her arms to catch her. Even with the thin cut of fabric between her arms she could tell Jinx’s hands were rough and calloused, the kind that you’d expect from someone who often works with their hands.

As Jinx gripped down against her to steady and Lux’s own hands fell onto Jinx to try and catch herself, that tension that had been slowly building up the entire walk was forced into forefront. This tingling sensation shot up and down her spine, spreading goosebumps across her shoulders.

The third thing that hit her was how strong Jinx was. Up close you could certainly tell that she had muscle, although it was all lean and whipcord, not like someone you’d traditionally expect to be able to carry huge loads on their own like Garen. While Lux wasn’t exactly the heaviest human being on the planet, Jinx also seemed small enough that suddenly bearing Lux’s weight would at least push her back. But Jinx hardly budged at all, she caught Lux like it was nothing, far stronger than Lux had anticipated.

The fourth and final thing that hit her was Jinx’s eyes.

It wasn’t like she hadn’t seen them before, and it wasn’t like she hadn’t noticed how distinct and piercing they were. But up close like this, when Lux wasn’t angry and near screaming at Jinx it was different. Somehow up close the bags under her eyes seemed heavier, more obvious, and when her expression was twisted into an uncharacteristic slash of surprise, they looked softer, still a bit creepy but not as much as before. The veins that spread out from her eyes seemed more… sad like this, like wounds etched permanently into the side of her head. And then those deep pink irises that almost seemed to glow with how intense they were. You could get lost in those colors, watching the way at some angles it seemed harsh and dark, and at others like it was gentle and fun.

“Blondie? Hey, Blondie you good?”

Oh gosh. How long had she been staring?

“Y-Yeah fine!” Lux said, using her hands to push away from Jinx and regain her footing.

She tried her best to reorient with their surroundings. Apparently, she must have missed it when the dude who knocked her down apologized (that or he just didn’t) because he wasn’t in the elevator anymore. In fact, it was just the two of them now. She blushed a bit at just how ridiculous the situation was and tried her best to forget the feeling of Jinx’s hands on her arms. Needless to say, it didn’t work very well. Ugh, another thing to add to the list of ways Jinx has gotten on her nerves.

Jinx looked her over a few times, those pink eyes traveling over her with an analytical glare, different from the times she’d noticed Jinx’s eyes travel her form before. She seemed pleased with the answer she came to in her head, made eye contact with Lux and made a “Hmf” before she spoke.

“You’re kinda weird too, Lux.”

She didn’t even have time to think of a response before the elevator dinged and the door opened on the seventh floor. No time to spare thinking about said comment, she walked out, Jinx following, hands still in her pockets. Again, neither of them spoke as Lux led them towards her room, but it was a different kind of silence than before. It wasn’t awkward, or tense, well in some ways Lux supposed it was but not like before. The best thing to do was ignore it, she decided. Jinx would probably say something stupid that made her angry in a moment anyway.

Finally, they made it to her door, and without a word she pulled out her keys and unlocked it, walking inside. Jinx followed, and the door shut behind them with a satisfying click. For the first actual time since they’d met a few days ago, they were completely alone together. Lux gently laid her camera bag and backpack down, sat down at her desk, and opened her laptop.

Jinx tossed her bag to the ground and looked around for a moment before taking a seat on the edge of Lux’s bed, deciding that no, she did not have to ask Lux if that was an okay place to sit as opposed to the other two chairs in the room.

“So” Jinx said, “What’s on our docket? You said something about software?”

Lux couldn’t help but roll her eyes.

“Yes, the software professor Viktor told us we would need, y’know, the engineering design program that he emailed us each a key for?”

Jinx stared back blankly.

“Do you ever pay attention?”

“Nah. I’m supposed to take meds for that, but I can’t afford them so...”

“O-Oh, geez I’m sorry I didn’t mean to-”

“Easy blondie I wasn’t trying to make you feel bad, it was a joke. Well, I mean, it wasn’t a joke like it’s not true, it was a joke like I was trying to be funny with the fact that- Y’know let’s just move on. So, software.”

Lux agreed that moving on was in fact the best thing here.

“Yeah, it’s like a simulation tool for our projects, we’re gonna have to use it the whole semester. I guess it’s some fancy stuff the school managed to get from the Ferros Corporation so, I guess it’s important. I don’t really know anything about math or all the science stuff, so I’m kinda relying on you for that. Which I really, really, hate to admit.”

Jinx hopped off the bed and walked over behind Lux’s chair, peering over her at the screen as she began to install the program.

“Hmm. Well, you’re not gonna be able to rely on me that hard. When I say I like engineering, I mean like mechanics. I play with engines and other things that go brrrr. Can’t say I ever tried… I don’t know… bridges? Sewers? What the fuck are we doing?”

“Professor Viktor hasn’t told us yet. But you still know more than me so…” She let out a sigh and turned to look at Jinx. “I guess we’ll just have to figure it out as we go, huh?”

Jinx shrugged and strolled back to her perch on Lux’s bed. Lux shook her head and looked back to the computer, checking to see what the installation time was like…

Wait a minute that couldn’t be right. That made absolutely no sense. How could it take that long?

“You’ve got to be kidding me.” Lux didn’t even realize she’d said it out loud till Jinx spoke from behind her.

“Sup?”

“The program says it’s going to take 3 whole hours to finish installing. That can’t be right… can it?”

Jinx groaned before getting back up from the bed and walking to Lux’s laptop. Without a word she put her hand on the back of Lux’s computer chair and rolled her out of the way (ignoring the noise of complaint Lux made) and started clicking through Lux’s laptop. Aimlessly as she went, the hand not controlling Lux’s computer had taken the end of her long braid and started to play with it. It was kind of cute actually, although Lux opted to pretend she’d never had that thought. Finally, Jinx turned to her and shrugged.

“Big software I guess.”

“Uggh of course. What are we gonna do for three hours while we wait?”

Jinx stood up straight, rolled a shoulder back, and turned to the door, starting to walk away.

“I don’t know about WE but I am going to get some food cause I’m fucking hungry. YOU can tag along if you want or you can sit here till it’s done. But I’m not gonna stay bored for three hours in here, as nice as your room is. Take your pick, Blondie.”

Lux took one more look at her laptop and the status bar moving at a slug’s pace. She looked back to Jinx who was standing with a hand on the doorknob, head turned towards Lux waiting for her answer.

Oh… fuck it.

She got up, grabbed her camera bag, and followed Jinx out the door.

Chapter Text

-Jinx-

--

Jinx was used to weird days. Hanging out with weird people, doing weird shit, it was kind of what she was known for. Which wasn’t exactly surprising when you grow up as the adoptive daughter of a drug lord, she supposed. But of all the weird days, people, and shit, this was at least up there as one of the weirdest.

And of all the goddamn people she expected to facilitate said weirdness, Lux was not who she expected. And yet here she was in her truck, leaving the campus with Lux in shotgun.

On one end she was regretting letting Lux come with, mostly because she was so irritating. Every time Jinx thought “Oh? Maybe there’s a cool girl underneath this layer of prissy bullshit” the prissy bullshit came back out. Don’t smoke, don’t be vulgar, don’t slash Ezreal’s tires blaah blaah blaah.

But on the other end, what fucking world was she living in that a knockout like Lux was hanging out with her? She was so damn cute, even when she was irritating, she was cute. That stupid little way her face scrunches when Jinx said something vulgar, the way she’s kind of clumsy like you just wanna princess carry her the whole way.

And not just cute but man she was attractive. Jinx didn’t want to be a creep about it, people should be respected and not objectified for their bodies. But FUCK this girl was hard not to look at. And she was still wearing that cute little skirt, thigh high socks, and a sweater that gave you just enough to make Jinx’s mind drift to her more base thoughts. And gods her golden hair was so fucking pretty, and her eyes were so vibrant and- and-

So yeah, even if she was kind of annoying and clearly hated Jinx, why shouldn’t she let Lux hang out with her?

Jinx remembered why exactly when she turned on her music.

Now Jinx’s truck was a little old, comes with the territory when you fix up an old pick-up nobody wants. And because of that it had no auxiliary port, just a radio with a CD player. It didn’t really bother Jinx that much because she was pretty sure if she had the option of choosing from her entire song library before driving, she would be 15 minutes late to everything she needed to be at.

So, she turned the radio on and was extremely pleased to hear Tear of the Goddess blasting on her favorite punk and metal station.

“Fuck yes.” She said as those sexy guitar riffs blessed her ears. Pentakill really was the fucking best and getting Kayle’s vocals only made it that much fucking better.

“This is the kind of music you listen to?” Lux said, turning from the window she’d been staring out of.

Of course, boring little miss perfect was here to try and ruin the fun.

“Does that honestly surprise you? Take one look at me and guess my music taste.”

“Okay I guess that’s fair. It’s just like… I don’t know, it’s a bit much for me. Too loud.”

Uggh how boring could one girl get.

“You need to learn how to have fun, Blondie. Lemme guess, you like pop and that’s it?”

“Hey, I know how to have fun!” There was that damn cute expression again. No denial on the pop music call though.

“Yeah right, what exactly does fun constitute for you? Wave around daddy’s credit card and buy new shoes? Take selfies with your gal pals and post them on Instagram?”

Lux rolled her eyes and leaned back in her seat before speaking.

“You love to assume things about me. For one, no, I don’t ‘wave around daddy’s credit card’ I’m not the dumb bimbo who has a perfect rich girl life you seem to think I am. And two, no, I don’t post things on Instagram either. Like I even have any friends to take selfies with.”

Jinx raised an eyebrow and turned towards her.

“What about those bitches at the bar? You seemed pretty chummy with them.”

“Oh, Marcie and them? Yeah, I don’t really consider us friends. They’re just the only people I know and hanging out with them is better than being lonely right?”

“Hmm.”

Welp, this was fucking awkward. She just wanted to poke at her because of her shit music taste, not apparently bring up her issues. But Jinx actually did feel a bit bad for her if what she said was true. If anyone knew what it was like to be alone, it was Jinx. Before she could think of a good response however, Lux spoke again.

“And I don't want the fun you’re talking about either. What do you do, get high and waste the evening? Drink and party all night? That’s just not for me.”

Fuck. Why was she such an asshole? Jinx took a few moments to think before speaking.

“I… kinda get what it’s like to be alone too. You think I’m the most popular kid on the block? I’m the resident campus screw up, and I don’t exactly have a clean rep in my hometown either. For what it’s worth, I’m sorry.”

Lux gave her an actual genuine look from that, but honestly Jinx was probably more surprised than her. All of their interactions so far had been vitriolic in some way shape or form, so a conversation like this was a bit weird. Curse her empathy, and also the fact that Lux was extremely attractive and made her do dumb things.

“And for the record, getting high and partying is very fun, assuming you know how to play it. And despite what you think that’s not all I do. I’m a mechanic at heart, like I said. Nothing gets me happier than an engine, a car, repair work, anything that lets me take shit apart and put it back together. And I play video games too. There’s more than just parties out there, you just gotta find what does it for you Luxie.”

After a moment, Lux leaned down and pulled up the bag she’d had slung over her shoulder the entire day.

“Well, actually I do really like photography. I’m not sure if fun is the right word though, it’s more like… passion? OH, and I like playing volleyball, so hah, I also have fun.”

“Photography and volleyball? They oughta put you on the cover of basic bitch magazine, hehe.”

Gods that was a dumb joke.

“Shut up.” Lux said with a laugh, half heartedly punching Jinx on the shoulder. It was a really pretty sound, but Jinx would never admit just how much it made her face warm with blush.

After that the rest of the drive was in silence. Thankfully the campus was close enough to home that they didn’t spend too much time on the busy Piltover streets before they got into the less crowded Zaun roads. There was a minor argument, if you can call it that, where Jinx turned the radio up only for Lux to reach over and turn it back down, but other than that it wasn’t totally awful.

Finally, she pulled up to their destination. A bit of a shitty parking job later and she was pulling the keys from the ignition and hopping out to her hunger savior. When bumming around in Zaun, something she was very good at, there was only one place you go to get a meal that fits the mood of doing nothing.

Sumpsnipe Bite, the shittiest yet somehow best tasting diner in all of Zaun. (This is not opinion this is law, no matter what Vi tries to claim)

Lux stepped out of the other side and took a look around before giving Jinx a look of both confusion and worry.

“This is where we’re eating?”

Jinx gave her a mischievous smile and threw her hands out to the sides in a grand gesture.

“My lady,” she spoke in her most posh mocking tone, which caused Lux to roll her eyes. “This is but the finest of establishments that can be found in the rich culture of Zaun and is certainly leagues above the cuisine served to yon rich folk. Trust me, it’s soo fucking good.”

Lux didn’t seem convinced, but followed Jinx anyway, her eyes darting back and forth.

“What’s the matter, never been this deep in Zaun?”

Lux gave a sheepish nod.

“Listen Blondie, you got nothing to worry about. Just stick with me and you’ll be fine. This is my home turf; I know these streets like the back of my hand.”

Without another word on the matter, she sauntered up to the doors and shoved them open, the sizzling smell of bacon immediately hitting her and sending a wave of nostalgia through her. Her and Vi would go here all the time with… Vander.

She quickly dispelled the thought from her head and walked in, hearing Lux shut the door behind her and quickly moving to catch up. Gray tiles spread out into one big room, a big, long bar with the serving staff behind it dominated the diner, with little red booths and silver(ish) tables set up all around. Country music played from an old radio on the wall, and everywhere road signs and paintings of famous places in Zaun were around. God, this place was so sick.

It was always busy during lunch time here considering its proximity to both the Sump and the Entresol, but luckily, she spotted an empty booth right against the window and quickly took a seat. Lux sat down opposite of her, still looking nervous as all hell, the ripped red fabric squeaking as they each took their seats.

Their waitress came over pretty damn quickly and handed them their menus, not like Jinx even needed to look at it. But as Lux wasn’t familiar, Jinx just ordered some coffee while she waited. She watched as Lux picked up the menu and squinted her eyes, looking over the menu items. After 5 or so minutes of watching Lux, the girl finally put the menu down and looked at Jinx.

“What’s a burger?”

All Jinx could do was stare at her. This had to be a prank, right? There was a hidden camera and this whole thing was one elaborate play? But no, Lux looked totally and utterly serious.

“You’re joking right? Are you telling me that you don’t know what a cheeseburger is?”

“Am I supposed to know?”

Jinx was so aghast she hadn’t even registered the mug of coffee that had been set down in front of her. Her jaw dropped and she put her fingers to her temples.

“How in any world could you not know what a cheeseburger is dude? That’s like one of the most common restaurant foods that exist. Are you from a fucking country that doesn’t have burgers? This can’t be real.”

Lux looked a mix of embarrassed and offended at the words.

“I-I don’t know I’ve just never heard of it before, why are you making a big deal out of it? Is it not like a regional dish, half the menu is different kinds of burgers? Just tell me what it is alright? I’ve never been to a place like this before, geez.”

Jinx took a second to let her amazement set in before actually thinking about you describe a burger to someone who doesn’t know what a fucking burger is. Almost on impulse as she started to turn the gears in her head she reached over and grabbed a sugar packet, ripping it open mechanically to dump into her coffee.

“Uh well. So you get like ground beef and you make it into a patty. Wait shit you wouldn’t know what a patty was. It’s just like… fuck… almost like a hockey puck shape, right? You put egg in there too to help it retain its shape. Then you take it and grill it, put it on a bun with y'know, cheese, lettuce, onions, tomato, if you want you can put like mayonnaise or mustard on it, a bunch of shit y'know?”

“So,” Lux began, “It’s kind of like steak?”

Jinx paused the ripping of the third sugar packet to think.

“I guess kind of. I mean it’s all beef, right? But dude change of plans if you’ve never had one, we are both getting burgers now. Just order the classic burger, trust me here.”

Lux looked a little suspicious but didn’t protest, putting the menu down.

“For myself” Jinx continued, “I’m getting the Wharfside Burger, which it has this like… spicy whiskey barbecue sauce and a big onion ring, and it’s got bacon and brown sugar and-”

“Hold on hold on,” Lux interrupted, “that’s like your fifth sugar packet. Are you seriously going to drink your coffee like that?”

Jinx looked down to the little ceramic mug and the four little torn sugar packets around, then looked back to Lux with a smile.

“Well you see, Blondie, I like my coffee how I like my women. So sweet and sugary there’s definitely something wrong with it.” She ended it off with a wink as she started to stir her drink.

Lux rolled her eyes and spoke back.

“For someone who said I wasn’t your type, you sure like to flirt with me. A-And besides I’m not like that so you can just stop.”

Jinx was painfully aware of this yes. But also, like that? Kind of a weird way to describe being gay.

“Who knows? Maybe I’ve awakened something in you.”

Lux scoffed and shook her head, going back to the menu. Before too long the waitress came back and their food was ordered (Jinx had to hold back a laugh as Lux awkwardly asked the waitress about burgers leaving her just as confused as Jinx had been).

The rest of their conversation was kind of (really) boring. Neither of them had any more topics to bring up, or at least topics that were worth more than one or two sentences before it dropped. Although, it wasn’t really that bad. Normally Lux constantly gave her the “trying to look like I don’t like you” look that didn’t quite fit someone so… soft?

Jinx never really had an opportunity to just stare at Lux’s natural face like this before. She was so damn expressive that there was always some kind of emotion aimed at Jinx. But now sitting in the diner she seemed much more relaxed. More like herself.

Her plush lips were just slightly agape, a hint of teeth poking out from behind. It gave her this kind of look of gentle expression. Just above, her little button nose sat, highlighted by her soft cheeks on either side. Her eyelashes were long and feminine, almost fluttering when she blinked (Maybe that’s where her weird religious schoolgirl idea came from) and her eyes only made it stronger. It wasn’t like the murky waters of the River Pilt, but it was like the sparkling blue ocean that spread towards Shurima. Jinx couldn’t help but let her eyes follow sunlight trails of her hair framing her face with that black hairband.

She was practically the cover girl for conventional feminine attractiveness, but even in the short time Jinx had known her she could tell there was more to it. She was intelligent, energetic, but there was also this depth to it, hints of a dark disposition Jinx wanted to explore. And she was so fucking dorky, like who says “Geez” seriously?

Lux looked up from her phone and her eyes met with Jinx, who realized she’d been staring like a creep.

“W-What?" Lux asked, her brow furrowing. Gods even that was cute, this was fucking unfair. No girl should be allowed to be this pretty but straight.

“Nothing.”

Jinx turned her attention back to her megasweet coffee and managed to feel a little less awkward with just second long glances she could steal. Lucky for her their food arrived just then, and two baskets of food were sat down. The smell of her burger hit her nose, and she decided fuck paying attention to Lux, you are now going to destroy this meat construct.

And there it was, a perfect toasted bun half wrapped in foil to stop the absolutely disgusting greasiness from getting everywhere even though it actually did nothing, the caramel-colored bacon and onion ring peeking out, the crispy fries piled next to it. The patty was a brown that was only complimented by a generous coating of brown sugar. Oh, gods it was so gross and unhealthy, and she wanted it so badly.

She went in. The first tear she pulled into it was enough to set her taste buds alight. It was so sweet, and yet savory, and yet spicy, and oh fuck she was a goner. It wasn’t until half the burger was devoured that she looked up to Lux. It nearly made her choke.

Lux was using a fork and knife to slowly cut up the burger, making a quizzical but apparently satisfied face after each bite. Jinx’s near-death experience caught Lux’s eyes, and she frowned again.

“Don’t look at me like that, I don’t like the feeling of the foil around the bread.”

Jinx (still coughing) just shook her head and went back to the mass consumption of her meal. Before she knew it was all gone, and she leaned back with a satisfied groan. She was gonna feel so sick later, but it was hella worth it. One minor food blackout later, and Lux was apparently done with her meal, pushing the almost finished burger and hardly touched fries into the center of the table.

“So,” Jinx said, “What’s the verdict on burgers from miss only eats fancy food?”

Lux seemed to heavily contemplate the thought before replying.

“It was really bland. I think I need to get one like yours next time.”

Damn, Lux wasn’t the ‘bread is too spicy’ type? She just kept getting better and better.

Jinx was about to reply when a tap on her shoulder stole her attention away. She was about to start out with a ‘Excuse me who the fuck?’ until she saw who it was.

“Hey hey, what’s going on Jinx?”

Ekko stood before her, one arm leaning on the wall of the booth. He wore a simple pair of gray combat pants with brown lace up boots that fit him damn well, an orange t-shirt and that olive bomber jacket he liked so much, somewhat of a mirror to her own being covered in his unique style of street art. She couldn’t help but let her eyes focus on how good his dreads looked, she was so glad he dropped the shitty mohawk.

“Oh, hey dude what’s up? Wasn’t expecting to run into the boy punk sensation.”

She raised an arm up for a ceremonial fist bump, almost as a test more than anything. Last time they talked, Ekko was pretty angry with her, and if he refused the bump he was still mad. Lucky for her, he returned the notion. She could almost feel the tension in her shoulders disappear when he did that.

“C’mon you know I don’t like being called that. I still don’t get why that news site decided it made sense, I mean I’m 22, not some kid.”

Jinx just shrugged.

“Well, I think it was a good choice solely because of how annoyed it made you. Sounds like boy behavior to me, little man.”

Ekko just rolled his eyes before they flicked towards Lux, who was watching the two of them with wide eyes.

“Oh, uh shit right.” Jinx spoke, “Ekko: Lux, Lux: Ekko, there now you know each other.” Where had Jinx seen this scene before?

“Hey Lux, nice to meet you. I’m an old friend of Jinx.”

Ekko put his fist out for a fist bump from Lux, however she just looked confused. After a moment she awkwardly reached forward and shook his fist instead.

“Hi.”

Ekko raised his eyebrows at Jinx, but she just shook her head at him. He shrugged and took a step closer to the table.

“You ladies mind if I take a seat for a minute?”

“Oh, hell yeah dude. We’re just killing time so why not?”

Ekko smiled and sat down next to Jinx, causing her to have to shift over a bit as he got comfortable. Speaking of comfortable, Lux looked the opposite. For as weirdly open as she was with Jinx, she got kind of shy around everyone else around here. Or well, around pretty much everyone Jinx had seen her interact with. Bizarre.

“So, how do you guys know each other?” Ekko asked.

“We’re group partners, for school.” Lux said a little too fast, “Like, university I mean. The Academy.”

Ekko mouthed an “ah” before pulling up a cup of coffee and taking a sip. Wait a fucking moment…

“That’s my coffee you dick!”

Ekko just stuck his tongue out at her and put the mug back down.

“You know the rules Jay, snooze you lose. Besides I don’t want any more of your sugar bomb anyway. The fuck do you drink this? it tastes like a pixie stick.”

Jinx stuck her tongue out back and retrieved her coffee, guzzling the rest down before another childhood friend snuck out of the woodworks and drank the rest. Damn leeches.

Ekko just laughed and shook his head.

“Hey, so listen.” He began, “Week after Friday the Firelights are gonna play a show in a place by the wharf. It’s not exactly big time but a lot of people are coming. You down to rock with us?”

Her eyes went wide, and she nodded.

“Gods yes it’s been so long since I was at a concert. Just text me the address I’ll be there all fucking night.”

“Hell yeah. Oh, and uh” he glanced at Lux “You can come too if you like, Lux. I don’t know if that’s your scene but hey, it’ll be lots of fun.”

“Oh, well, maybe, I don’t really go to those kinds of things very often.” Lux said. Her demeanor was starting to open up a bit, but Jinx wasn’t surprised. If Ekko was good at one thing it was making friends. And he was good at a lot of other shit too.

“No problem, I get it’s not for everyone. But it’d be awesome to see you there regardless.”

“Maybe. I’ll um, be right back. I’ve gotta use the restroom.”

Lux stood up and got out, looking around for said room. Jinx did find it a bit amusing to see her try and locate it. After she found it, there was a long slow pause from Ekko, and a sudden anxious energy pulled into the air before he turned to Jinx with a serious expression.

“Look, I just wanna be completely honest with you alright? No shimmer. No fucking shimmer at all. No bringing shimmer, no selling shimmer, no using shimmer, nothing.”

There it was. She tried for a moment to think of some kind of counter argument but, just realistically there wasn’t one.

“Fine. No shimmer at Mr. Goody Two Shoe’s punk show.”

“I mean it, Jinx. I’m still pissed at you for selling to Ran. You know how damn hard they worked to be clean after Silco went down and watching her relapse fucking sucked. I’m not letting it happen again. If there’s even one hint of shimmer at this gig, and you brought it, we’re done and I’m not talking to you anymore. You got it?”

The mention of it was enough to bring Jinx’s mind a little towards that inching, creeping feeling she’d had in her gut. This need to just stop, make everything feel good, no thinking no acting just… pulsing reeling pleasure. She’d ignored it as long as she fucking could and focused on Lux, but she just couldn’t anymore. Without food, or a talk, or a pretty girl, there was no way to ignore the shaking in her hands. She knew Ekko spotted it too, but he didn’t say anything.

Fuck.

She could practically feel that weak shaking suddenly infecting her knees as the image of a needle came into focus. Her elbows came next, involuntarily tensing up. Fuck just don’t think about just, just, just think about Fishbones yeah. She needed to get new leather to wrap the handlebars, and maybe a new coat of paint. Some new designs, or maybe even a full engine tune up.

The feeling slowly went away, and she was able to center herself back into reality. Hardly any time had passed, despite how long it took.

“Okay. No shimmer, I’ll just get a dime bag for myself instead. I-I-I’m sorry.”

Ekko sighed and let the back of his head hit the seat for a moment before he nodded.

“I know. I’m sorry too. I really wish we weren’t in this situation but, we are. I care about you man, I just… I can’t… I just don’t wanna lose you again.”

What do you even say to that? You cause someone so much pain, cause their friends so much pain, and then they go and say, ‘I don’t want to lose you’. Did she even believe him? There was no reason Ekko should be giving her this chance right now, by all rights she knew deep down he hated her.

Fuck feelings like this. This is why she used shimmer in the first place. Talk about a positive feedback loop.

They sat in silence for another minute or two before Ekko leaned forward and spoke again.

“So, what’s up with this Lux girl? She reads Piltie like crazy.”

Ah, change the awkward subject. Not that she was complaining.

“Not even, I don’t know where she’s from, but she knows too little about this place to be from here. Get this, when I drove her down from topside to undercity, she was so used to taking the trams that she didn’t even fucking realize how steep the roads are. And she couldn’t take her eyes off the Sun Gates when they came into view.”

Ekko chuckled and turned towards her.

“Sounds awful. So, a foreign rich kid? I feel for you. How bad is it?”

Well… she was aggravating but… hmm… Jinx wasn’t sure it was fair to say that. She still didn’t get why but Lux was willing to dump her lonely issues on Jinx or whatever, and that was… nice. Everything since they’d been in the truck was nice.

But she was already pretty low on Ekko’s tier list right now, and she knew he wasn’t big on rich kids. Better to not ruin their friendship any further.

“Gods sooo annoying. She never fucking shuts up about ‘do this, do that, why are you so rude, why are you not proper’. It’s exhausting.”

“I’ll bet, that sucks ass dude. Good luck dealing with her for your project. Hey, I’m gonna jet, I’ve got practice in an hour. Tell your new princess I said goodbye.”

She pretended to blow her brains out with a finger gun in response.

“Will do. Later man.”

He stood up with a salute and sauntered out the door, leaving Jinx alone with her thoughts. Which was honestly never a good thing. She did feel bad about bad mouthing Lux, but… well at least Ekko wasn’t as pissed as he could’ve been. Fuck that pit in her stomach would not go away. Vi was home tonight so no shimmer either… Welp, edibles it was, she’d have to text that Glasc goon for a hookup.

Another minute or two later Lux came over and sat back down, scooting meekly into the seat. She looked kind of pale, weirdly.

…

Oh no…

…

The burger must have done her in.

“Rough time in the bathroom?”

Lux flicked her eyes up at Jinx but didn’t look at her directly for too long.

“Yeah. Guess so.”

That was… kind of cold. Huh, she must be feeling sick.

“Do you wanna head out then? We just pay for our meals at the front, and we can get back to project work.”

“That’s probably for the best.”

What the fuck?

“Uhm… Okay, let’s go then. I guess.”

The two of them stood up, Lux lagging behind Jinx ever so slightly as they paid for their food. Lux was out the door first actually (Lux paid with card and Jinx had to fish out cash from her jacket pockets), and as Jinx turned to catch up with her, Lux let go of the door. The heavy wood and old iron springs creaked as it slammed shut in Jinx’s face, making her jump in shock.

Ok.

Fucking what?

Jinx angrily threw open the door and started walking after Lux who was already on route to her car.

“Hey,” Jinx said, “maybe you could toss a sorry my way? You kinda let that fall right in my face dude.”

Lux glanced towards her with a halfhearted look.

“Guess I’m just not feeling well.”

She opened up the door to Jinx’s truck and pulled herself inside, shutting it before Jinx could even try to process that response. Honestly there were too many things in her head at the time, and she just decided she didn’t want to. She got in the driver seat, turned the car on, and drove them back to campus in total silence. No music, no conversation, just pure unbridled tension. Maybe she was going to need a whole bag of edibles.

She slowly rolled into a spot at the campus lot and threw her truck into park. Neither of them moved for a few seconds. Did Jinx do something? Was it her fault? Lux just came out of the bathroom and started acting all mean. Was it unrelated? Fuck no it had to be something.

“Uhm… are you gonna… go to the concert?” Jinx said.

Lux looked her over a few times over, before opening the door.

“Not a party girl, in case you weren’t listening. Don’t bother coming with me, I’ll finish installing the software myself.”

And without waiting for a response, she shut the door and walked off.

…

…

Oh absolutely 100% fuck off.

So, she just figured she’d let Jinx take her around, show her a good place, act like maybe for a second, she was going to be Jinx’s friend then fucking leave?! Act like she didn’t even fucking know Jinx?! Oh, I’m soooo lonely, oh Marcie isn’t actually my friend, and I really want youuu to be my friend Jinx. Jinx just suddenly wasn’t worth her fucking rich girl credit card time?

“FUCK!”

She slammed her fists on the wheel and gripped hard, feeling the edges of her nails start to dig into her skin. For a few seconds she just sat there, breathing angrily through her nose as emotions she couldn’t even begin to understand went through her one by one. Fuck it.

She pulled out her phone and called Carin.

After a few long tones he answered.

“What’s happenin, Jinx?”

“Hey. 7 tonight. Your place. Bring a few hits.”

There were a few moments of pause on the other end before he spoke.

“Whatever you want.”

She hung up before he uttered another word and drove out of the campus lot before she could fuck up again.

Chapter Text

-Lux-

--

The bathroom door shut behind Lux as she walked back out into the dingy restaurant Jinx had brought her too. She was just turning the corner around the narrow hallway to where Jinx and Ekko were waiting but stopped as she heard their voices. Geez, they were so loud. She smiled to herself as, without really trying to, she eavesdropped on their conversation.

“Not even,” It was Jinx speaking, “I don’t know where she’s from, but she knows too little about this place to be from here. Get this, when I drove her down from topside to undercity, she was so used to taking the trams that she didn’t even fucking realize how steep the roads are. And she couldn’t take her eyes off the Sun Gates when they came into view.”

Lux froze.

“Sounds awful. So, a foreign rich kid? I feel for you. How bad is it?”

Her chest grew tight suddenly, and her pulse was getting faster, the sound thumping in her ears. There was a moment where Jinx didn’t say anything, and Lux clenched her fists.

She was going to defend Lux. That moment they shared in the truck… when Lux had opened up and Jinx was kind to her… everything was different, even if it had just been a few words. Jinx maybe even… maybe she even could be a friend. Professor Viktor was right, just because she’s complicated doesn’t mean she and Lux can’t match.

“Gods sooo annoying. She never fucking shuts up about ‘do this, do that, why are you so rude, why are you not proper’. It’s exhausting.”

…

The conversation faded out of hearing as one of the chefs was yelling nearby about an order of fried octopus. She turned her head around the boundary of the hallway to see Ekko standing up, then Jinx putting two of those calloused lithe fingers up against her temple and pretending to shoot herself.

…

Luxanna Crownguard was an idiot.

For one long, beautiful moment Lux thought she had found a new friend. Someone who inspired these strange complex emotions that she’d never had. She made Lux smile, she made her frustrated, she left Lux’s face warm and red with no understanding as to why. Lux thought for the first time she’d made a real connection.

And Jinx was just another Marcie.

It took every single ounce of control not to stomp over and scream at her at the top of her lungs. But they were in public, she wasn’t supposed to make a scene. So instead of acting like Jinx, she acted like a Crownguard.

--

Until she made it back to her room.

She dropped her Camera bag on the ground and walked forward, barely controlling her breathing. Sitting on her desk was the laptop, a dialogue prompt reading “INSTALLATION COMPLETE :)” was facing her. She moved over and practically slammed it shut.

Why was she such an idiot? Why did she fall for something so stupid? “I’m lonely too, let's be friends?” It was so obviously fake. Jinx was a flaky, drug-using, hedonistic bitch who pretended to act like a friend and then talk bad about you behind your back, in the same hour that you became ‘friends’. All so she could… could…

What was the point? Why would someone spend their energy on that? Did Jinx hate her for coming from wealth that much?

Her breaths were getting shakier, and her eyes burned as tears started to well up. No, no this wasn’t ok, she couldn’t lose control of this. She had control; she knew what she was doing. Arms still shaking and chest pounding at 1000 beats per minute, she sat on the end of her bed and took a deep breath. A ping from her phone made her jump, and she grabbed it a little too fast.

// Ezreal: Hey so you never gave me an answer about the party. U thinking you wanna go? If not, y'know we could like, see a movie, or go to the arcade, or just hang and stuff lol. //

There was a moment where Lux nearly snapped her phone in half, but she didn’t. Instead, she opted for grabbing her pillow and chucking it at a wall. It really didn’t make her feel any better. She placed it back onto the bed and fought back another wave of tears. Where were they even coming from? She’d only known Jinx for three days, and she knew well enough that Jinx wasn’t going to be friendly. She knew Jinx didn’t like her. She knew being forced to work with her was going to be hell.

So why did it hurt so much?

Lux stayed inside for the rest of the day and didn’t see Garen’s missed call until the morning.

--

Jinx didn’t show up to class Friday.

--

The weekend was spent as most of Lux’s weekends were. Studying her notes on political conflicts in history, reading up on every class detail she could to ensure she was prepared for the next week of classes, and maybe when she got a chance, she would watch her favorite television program, or go outside and try to get some good pictures.

After all, she did have a big photo project to work on, and she had no Idea what she wanted to submit. As much as photography was something Lux really cared about, and really loved to do, sometimes she felt a little… restrained. Her knowledge of techniques and rules and the composition of images was all up to date with modern photography. Her understanding of the Camera itself was beyond satisfactory. She had plenty of resources to try different styles, different types of cameras, different places to take photos. And yet there was still something missing to her work. Like their spark of life and inspiration you see in the works of a museum. But how she could get that final spark to show in her work, Lux had no idea.

So an uneventful weeked for an uneventful girl. If Jinx were with her she would have been chastised for being too boring. Ugh. Jinx.

They hadn’t said a word to each other since Wednesday, and that was exactly how Lux wanted it to be. The problem came from the fact that they still needed to do this project together. While Lux considered herself an intelligent and excellent student, she wasn’t an engineer. She didn’t know exactly how to design a bridge, or a new highway, or a sewer system. And while Jinx claimed she didn’t either, she at least understood the physics and mechanical nature behind construction.

Even if Jinx hated her, they would have to do this project in the end. Monday morning before class, she texted Jinx.

// Lux: Listen, whatever our feelings towards each other are we need to do this project. I’m assuming you don’t want to fail, and I can’t afford to get anything less than an A. So, don’t skip today, please? We just need to get some work done on it after class, and then we don’t have to talk at all till Wednesday. //

She didn’t get a response. Figures. Regardless of the situation she needed to go to class anyway, so she got dressed (making a note to avoid the skirt and sweater she’d worn the last week for absolutely no reason) and prepared herself for the day.

--

To her incredible surprise, when she walked into the classroom Jinx was already inside. Sitting at a desk, legs spread and leaning back with that uncaring attitude of hers, she glanced up to Lux, and just looked at her. She was dressed much the same as she always did, in fact, those might have been the exact same Jeans Jinx had worn everyday. Though for a girl like Jinx that checked out. Although over her usual tank top, Jinx was wearing what looked like a red button up, the sleeves rolled back to show off the lean muscle and definition of her long arms.

Lux hated how warm her face was. If Jinx noticed though, she didn’t say anything. In fact she didn’t say anything at all, just stared at Lux. Taking a deep breath to calm the frustration and other things, she walked in and took the seat right next to Jinx.

In what seemed to be becoming a tradition for them, they both stayed silent. Jinx was still staring at her though, those pink eyes flickering back and forth like she was being mentally dissected. Gods they were pretty eyes, even if they creeped Lux out a bit. Regardless of how Jinx looked, she hated Lux and had made it known. She needed to stop letting Jinx’s weird messed up energy freak her out. And this was far too awkward to go on anymore.

“I have class after this,” She began. “I won’t be finished until 4pm. Do you remember my room number?”

Jinx nodded.

“Good. We can just spend an hour or two working and then you can go. Don’t want to make you stay with someone as exhausting as me.”

She didn’t need to add the last part, in fact it would have been far better if she hadn’t, she knew. And yet there was this part of her that just wanted to let everything out. But that wasn’t how Crownguards behaved, so she refused to drop to said level. That said, Mom always knew how to make a good passive aggressive comment so, why shouldn’t Lux?

At the words Jinx gave her a long look, although more than anything she seemed a bit confused. Was she really so dense that she hadn’t figured out Lux heard her yet?

Before Jinx could reply however the rest of the class filled in, including Professor Viktor, being doted on by the taller man she assumed he had previously mentioned. Jayce, she’d managed to piece together. Again Jayce was shooed off by Viktor, and he turned to address the class.

“Good morning everyone, today we’re just going to be talking about your first project. You should all have installed the software we will be using this semester, so after today you will be free to begin your projects. Now since we’re starting with the basics here, everyone is going to be designing a bridge. A bit cliche, I know but eh, structural integrity and the methodology beyond that is key to all the other work we’ll be doing. Now let’s get into the specifics…”

Professor Viktor’s lecture about their project went on… and on… and on. While he was really nice, and all around a really cool teacher, he was very soft spoken, even when passionate. And when he went into things like math Lux couldn’t help but find herself drifting away. She caught herself the first few times and tried to take notes, but eventually it was just too much. She dozed and daydreamed as time went on, thinking about whatever.

Whatever was Jinx.

There was no use lying to herself, everytime a train of thought went, it usually ended up towards the other girl. Obviously filled with frustration sure, but a lot of it ended up circling back to other things. Their day before the diner, the night at the bar, what working with her in the future would be like. She did however put every effort into not turning towards her, for fear of once again seeing those eyes pulling her apart piece by piece.

She did it anyway. Just a flicker of a glance to see what Jinx was doing. Instead of those eyes staring at her as she expected, instead she saw the girl with her arms crossed, head back, and eyes closed.

She was sleeping.

Of course she was sleeping. Although Lux was having trouble blaming her at the moment, if she also cared as little as Jinx, she might snooze this one as well. No longer held back by the fear of being noticed, she leaned an elbow on her desk, placed her chin down softly, and peered intently at Jinx.

Her head kind of nodded up and down a few times, mouth alternating between closed and ever so slightly open. Her head was against the back of her chair, the rest of her lanky form kind of spilling out from under the desk, her back acting as a crutch for the position. She was actually really cute when she was like this. Normally she seemed somewhere stuck between manic and apathetic, but now she seemed peaceful. Not in the way you’d expect to see someone getting a restful sleep, but in the way that Jinx hardly ever stepped moving. Even when she sat, a leg bobbed or a foot tapped, she was always in motion. But now, save for small automatic movements, she was totally still.

It almost made Lux forget that Jinx hated her. The smile that had creeped on her face fell away, and she did her best to pay attention to the rest of the lecture.

Jinx actually woke up about an hour in, nearly falling out of her desk with a jumping start. Professor Viktor only asked if she was ok but nothing more. She stayed awake the rest of the lecture.

After another painstaking hour, time finally ran out, and the professor let them go. She went to remind Jinx of their arrangement, but Jinx bolted out of the room as soon as class ended, and Lux didn’t want to chase her again. She sighed and went on with the rest of her day.

--

It was 4:27, and to no one’s surprise Jinx was late. She had sent a text of reminder but didn’t get a response again. Once 4:15 had hit she opted to just work on it without her, which she had already kind of mentally prepared herself to do.

Until a knock on the door pulled her attention away from the laptop.

She steadied herself with a calming breath, and walked to let Jinx in. There she stood, much the same as earlier that day only now she wore an oversized canvas colored hoodie that said “Nashramae Armordillo Festival'' in big green letters. Lux couldn't’ deny the sigh of relief, even if neither of them wanted to be together, she needed Jinx’s help with the math.

“Yo.”

Articulate as always.

“Hey, come in, I already started since you’re now… twenty eight minutes past when I told you to be here.”

Jinx rolled her eyes but stepped in, bag hitting the ground with a thud.

“Remind me exactly what we’re doing? I’m still hungover and didn’t catch anything today.”

Ah, that explained her weird mood.

“Well we have to design a bridge, intended for residential and commercial traffic. The bridge has to be 500 meters long, and needs to withstand a total weight capacity of... what are you doing?”

Jinx had flopped face first onto her bed, leaning her head up just a bit to see Lux.

“I just told you,” She spoke, muffled by Lux’s covers, “I have a fucking hangover.”

And that somehow gave her permission to lay on Lux’s bed? Ugh, whatever now wasn’t the time.

“Fine, there’s some painkiller in my bathroom. Listen you just need to explain to me the numbers stuff and make sure the design isn’t faulty okay? Then you can leave.”

Jinx made some kind of incoherent noise before letting herself fall to the ground, and limping like a zombie into Lux’s bathroom. Lux took a deep breath to calm herself down as she heard Jinx rifling through her medicine cabinet, before trudging back out with the bottle in hand. And back onto the bed she went.

Lux rolled her eyes and picked up her laptop from the desk, moving to sit next to Jinx (after all, Jinx was certainly not going to get up.)

“Alright, here’s what I’ve got so far. Can you do a check to make sure it all makes sense?”

And so they began to work, albeit at a slow pace, due to Jinx’s hangover. It was just as painful as you’d imagine, horribly awkward. Though, Jinx was able to pretty easily piece things together and solve a lot of their issues. She really was good at engineering, though when Lux pointed out that having the bridge get 12 lanes on each side kind of broke the “city budget” they were supposedly getting, she just scoffed. Well, overall it was kind of neutral. But normal neutral dropped down to sucky here, because regardless of how well it was going Jinx still hated her.

Jinx kept acting like a bitch, and so Lux kept making passive aggressive comments in reference to what Jinx said behind her back. And yet Jinx STILL seemed confused when she said them. About 30 minutes in, and Lux finally lost her cool.

“Yeah,” Jinx said, “So you keep trying to put the stress limits at either end. Stop that, it doesn’t need it with the support of dry solid ground.”

“Oh well I’m sorry that everything I say is soooo annoying to you.”

Jinx looked at her and another bizarre expression.

“Why do you keep talking like that? You keep saying exhausting, annoying, demanding. It’s starting to get weird.”

Lux felt a vein on her temple twitch.

“Starting?! How oblivious can you freaking be?! I’ve been doing that since this morning and you just caught on?!”

Jinx sat up, eyebrows furrowing, but before she could speak Lux cut her off.

“I heard you talking with Ekko at the diner. I heard everything you said about me. ‘She’s so annoying, she’s exhausting’, and all the rest of it. And you JUST figured out what I’ve been doing?!”

Jinx’s expression changed from anger at the yelling to a look of confusion.

“What I said to…”

No way she didn’t remember. Lux was about to kick her out of the room. Suddenly Jinx’s eyes went wide.

“Oh fuck.”

Lux laughed out loud.

“‘Oh. Fuck.’ That’s all you have to say? About how you were talking behind my back Jinx? I thought you were cool, I thought you were honest, I thought-”

“Wait Lux just wait a second. It-It’s not what you think it is. Oh fuck me is this why you treated me like shit when I brought you home?”

She…

She didn’t even know that’s why Lux was mad that night?

“Listen, I forgot about that right away. I-I didn’t mean it man, Ekko he- well- he’s been pissed at me for some messed up shit I did and I-I- he was asking about you and he usually doesn’t really like rich people and I didn’t want him to be mad so I just… Well I just said some shit to make him happy. I well… I mean you are annoying, and exhausting, but I don’t mean that in a bad way. Shit I’m such an idiot I didn’t even realize. You’re… You’re not like other people in your spot. A lot of the stuff you do totally irks the hell out of me but, I don’t know. It’s not all that bad. Parts of you are actually kinda… nice.”

There were a few long moments of silence, Jinx awkwardly looking at her as if she’d just walked on stage to another person's performance. But… was she being serious? Jinx really didn’t mean it to be hurtful?

“That doesn’t make it okay. That’s a really not cool thing to do. And what do you mean you forgot? It was just a few days ago.”

Jinx stared at her before grabbing the painkillers and shaking the bottle.

Her hangover

“Jinx before today, when was the last time you were sober?”

Jinx counted out a few things on her hand.

“I took a 6 hour break to go watch hockey with my sister so… Saturday I guess. But before Saturday… The night we last hung out.

“Geez you’ve been drunk that entire time?”

“Well high for some of it, drunk for the other parts.”

“Why?!”

“Well after you were mad at me… I kind of just thought you were tired of being around me and left. And I uh… hehe… Not great with abandonment according to my clinical advisor. So, y’know… drugs and stuff.”

“Jinx I would never just get tired of hanging out with you and leave like that.”

“W-Well yeah I see now it’s my fault but i didn’t think about it at the time, because the shit I said to Ekko didn’t mean anything. So like, as soon as he left I just kinda moved on in my brain.”

Geez, what was this weird situation? Jinx spoke up before she could choose her next words.

“I-I’m sorry. I really wasn’t trying to hurt you man. I just do shit without thinking, and I end up ruining things because of it, and I really don’t do good with other people, and… and-”

“Stop. I-It’s okay Jinx. It’s my fault too. I could’ve just brought it up to you at the diner, but I wanted to hurt you back. That wasn’t very mature of me, and I… I didn’t know you would react like that… that’s really scary. I’m sorry.”

Jinx choked out a sound that was almost crying, but seemingly forced herself to stop. Lux could see it now, and realized why Jinx’s eyes had bothered her so much this morning. There was just a tiny bit of that pink haze filling the whites, like the night at the bar. Geez, no wonder she was so spaced out this morning.

“Listen,” Lux said, “I… don’t really get along with you.”

“I’ve noticed.”

“And you don’t really get along with me.”

“Yeah, sums it up.”

“But even if that’s the case, I didn’t mean for it to hurt you like that. And, I see that you weren’t trying to hurt me either. So even if we hate each other, I think we can both just move forward, right? Even if I hate you… You… are kind of fun to be around.”

Jinx’s eyes went wide, and for a second Lux thought she might let a few more tears roll. But suddenly the smile turned into a devilish grin.

“Careful Luxie, I might just fall for you if you keep talking to me like that.”

There she is.

“And for the record,” Jinx continued, “I do find you annoying and exhausting, but in a good way. Trust me, if I don’t like you, I let you know to your face. Like I’m doing right now. I can’t stand you.”

Lux smiled.

“I can’t stand you either.”

--

30 minutes of work turned to one hour, one hour turned to two, two hours to three, and before too long it was 8:10. The tension had changed significantly, and after resuming their status of mutual annoyance, things were going decently well. It was late but they had made huge strides on the assignment, and everything was going great.

“Hey, why don’t we take a break.” Lux said. “My fingers are starting to get kinda sore.”

Jinx threw the idea around before nodding, and hopping off her bed.

“Yeah, I'm down, my brain hurts anyway. What should we do though?”

Lux cocked her head towards Jinx.

“Do? What do you mean, do? It’s a break.”

“Yeah, and breaks are where you like, play games or watch anime or something. C’mon Blondie, you expect me to just sit in place for 20 minutes?”

“Now that you mention it, yes. I wouldn’t mind some peace and quiet.” She ignored Jinx sticking her tongue out after that. “But do you have any ideas? I don’t really watch anime, or have any games around.”

“Hmm…” Jinx closed her eyes before snapping and grabbing her bag from the ground. “Let’s play Uno!”

She produced a strange multi-colored box with the previously mentioned ‘UNO’ in big yellow letters.

“Uno? what’s Uno?”

“Oh my gods, first burgers and now Uno? Does your homeland not have culture, woman?!”

“Excuse you, Demacia has plenty of culture. I just… don’t have much experience with these kinds of things.”

Jinx sat down in front of the bed as she rolled her eyes.

“Right right forgot you’re a spoiled inside cat who’s owners never let you outside.”

“Can you not call my parents my ‘owners’.” (though it was pretty accurate)

“Fine, whatever, just take a seat bitch and lemme explain the rules.”

Lux joined her on the floor, and they played Uno. It was a simple game, you match colors or numbers, some cards had certain things happen, it was certainly a good way to waste time. It was fun for a while, and Jinx did make her laugh with the things she’d say. It was pretty great, until she was hit by a sudden reminder below her stomach.

“I’ll be right back. Bathroom”

Without waiting for a response she made her way in and scrounged through the different items, throwing supplies and such around looking for what she needed.

Fuck. She was out. This was gonna be awkward. After a moment of dread, Lux tiptoed her way back into her room. Jinx was on her phone, not paying attention. Lux could already feel the embarrassment seeking into her cheeks.

“Hey… you don’t happen to have pads with you, do you? Could I borrow one?”

Jinx just looked up at her for a few seconds, pink eyes unblinking in this weird way she sometimes did. But then she shook her head.

“Nope, I don’t carry 'em. Can’t imagine having to bleed through your vagina. Sucks to be you.”

Ugh.

“Uh, yeah, you do too.”

Jinx grinned.

“Nah.”

…

“What?”

“I said nah.”

“I heard you, what do you mean nah? Of course you have periods.”

Jinx rolled her eyes.

“I’m Trans, genius.”

…

What?

Apparently the look on Lux’s face told Jinx what she thought.

“Transgender. Please tell me you know what that word means?”

Lux had to take a moment before she responded.

“You mean like… you want to be a man?”

Jinx facepalmed.

“No dork the other way round. I used to be a guy, now I’m a girl. I just have a different set of pipes than you, and if mine starts bleeding I have to see a doctor, not wrap it in some cloth.”

…

“O-Oh my gosh I’m so sorry! Geez I didn’t mean to say anything rude I just-”

“Woah! Woah. Easy there Blondie. No need to freak out, you just didn’t know. Relax man. Take a breather.”

Lux did as instructed, pulling her embarrassment back.

“I’m sorry again. I… where I grew up those kinds of things aren’t really… common, so I don’t know a lot about it. And you just seem so much like a girl that I just thought you must’ve meant the other way. N-Not that you shouldn’t seem like a girl, it’s just that, I always kind of thought...”

Jinx just shrugged and started putting the cards away.

“I don’t exactly know ‘what you thought’ but I can’t imagine it’s good. Though I can’t blame you specifically I guess. If you grew up not learning about being gay, or trans, or bi or whatever, I guess it would kind of surprise you to find out the things you were taught aren’t what’s real. But, honestly it’s pretty common here, and not looked down on either. Maybe there’s a few assholes here and there, but nothing too bad.”

Jinx looked up with a quizzical eyebrow.

“This doesn’t change how you think about me, does it?”

“No no not at all! I just wasn’t expecting it, that’s all. But I mean that's amazing Jinx. It’s really cool that you can have that… experience? Change? I don’t know the right word. A-And I mean you look great!” Why did she have to add that part?

“Say no more, I getcha. Good, as long as you recognize I’m a girl regardless of what’s between my legs, we’re still cool and I still hate you. Just for other things, and not for being a transphobe.”

Unsure what to do, Lux gave Jinx two thumbs up which got a laugh out of Jinx.

“So…” Lux said. “What was it like? Changing. If that’s something I’m allowed to ask.”

Jinx stood up, now sufficiently having cleaned her things into her bag, and sat on the edge of the bed.

“Hmm… Honestly It varies, I guess. Even as a little kid I knew something was different, wrong, and I always wanted to be a girl. Honestly, some of that is because I wanted to be like my sister, and it all kind of mixed together. I told my sister when I was really young, and she told me it was okay, and I just started being a girl. Then when I was… I think we guessed 14, my dad managed to get me the medicine I needed to stop being a boy, and become a girl, if that makes any sense. Medically speaking. And I still take it to this day. But, that doesn’t take away all the bad parts. Sometimes my body still feels… wrong, like I want to rip all my skin off and stop being me. It’s hard to explain to people who don’t understand that feeling.”

Lux sat down too. So that meant that Jinx had a… she had to stop her mind from drifting to weird places as she thought out a response.

“I’m really sorry that it’s hard for you.”

“Hey, don’t worry about it, Blondie, I’m used to it. I mean, I’m trans, I’m mentally ill, i’m socially isolated, I’m every suicide risk in the book baby. Life’s been trying to get rid of this asshole since the cradle.”

Lux really didn’t know how to process that one emotionally. All she could think was to ignore it and circle back.

“Well… I’m glad your dad could help you.”

“Oh yeah, he did all kinds of stuff like that. Anything I wanted haha. I think like a year after I started my medicine, my girl juice if you will,” Lux rolled her eyes. “He actually took us on a vacation to Shurima because I read about the Armordillo festival in his library and I wanted to see it. That's where I got this.” Jinx pointed down at her big hoodie.

Lux couldn’t help but smile, imagining some blue haired guy being led around by a tiny excitable Jinx looking at some new place she’d never been. It made her think about her own dad, how he hardly ever smiled.

“It sounds like he’s a good guy.”

Jinx smiled, although it was different than before. This was only halfway there, bitter and cold.

“Y-Yeah. He was awesome.”

Was.

Before she could say another word Jinx got up from the bed and pulled her keys from her pocket.

“Come on, you’re out of pads right? I’ll drive you to the corner store and you can pick some up, I need a drink anyway.”

Oh gods she’d forgotten about her own situation.

“Right, thank you so much Jinx, let's go. And… I’m sorry.”

“Don’t mention it, it’s cool. I just don’t want to talk about it. Also uh… don’t get blood on my leather seats?”

“I revoke my thanks.”

--

Lux let out a shiver as the pair walked into the night air. It really was turning to Autumn fast, and with the sun just past setting, the dim cones of street lights were the only sense of warmth on campus. Hardly anyone was out on a monday at this time, and the grounds always felt a bit more barren like this. Empty almost, unlike the warm diverse colors it spouted during class time.

She wished she’d grabbed a jacket, but in her rush of improvising a solution until they found pads, she’d forgotten. All she wore was a pair of tight dark wash jeans, a simple blouse, and converse.

Jinx looked much more prepared in that big hoodie. Actually that reminded her of something.

“Hey if you got that hoodie when you were 14, why does it still seem big on you.”

Jinx let out a chuckle.

“This was the only size left in this color, but I really wanted it, so I used it as a blanket till I could wear it. Fuck, crazy to think it’s been almost 10 years since I got it. It’s special right, so I take really good care of it.”

“I can tell, I mean it looks almost new.”

A breeze blew past, and in a moment the night chill was back in Lux’s bones. She shivered again, arms wrapping around herself. She heard Jinx sigh next to her, and as she turned her head Jinx was starting to pull at her hoodie.

“H-Hey wait I don’t need-”

“Can it Blondie, we just walked out the door and you’re shivering. Just take good care of it, we’re only gonna be out for like 15 minutes max anyway.”

Another gust made up Lux’s mind for her.

“Ok. Thank you Jinx.”

Jinx nodded and resumed disrobing. The only problem was as she took it off, it was pulling the tank top below with it, and in a moment Jinx’s abdomen was exposed. Lux’s eyes went directly to it.

Thinking about it after the fact, Lux shouldn’t have been surprised. Jinx’s arms were made of whipcord muscle and tight defined mass so it made sense the rest of her body would follow this principle. And yet when Jinx’s shirt pulled up and her tone midriff was revealed, Lux literally felt the breath leave her body. On her right side those same cloud and bullet tattoos that covered her arms snaked across, and from her hips up she was all tone sharp lines. It wasn’t like she had a six pack persay, although there was the slightest hint of that. She wasn’t buff, she was lean. Wolfish. Fast and lithe and built to move. Lux just wanted to lean down and-

When the shirt was up enough that it was exposing the bottom of Jinx’s chest, Lux finally turned her head away, suddenly not nearly as cold as she had been moments before. Jinx mumbled some curses as she fought with the hoodie before finally exclaiming in victory. Lux was about to turn her head, but remembered that she was refined enough not to look in case Jinx was still indecent.

“Oh shit. Sorry Luxie, I didn’t realize my tits were out. My bad. Damn, my piercings get cold in this weather too.”

She wanted to look she wanted to look she wanted to look she wanted to look oh gods above she wanted to look.

“Hey, Blondie. You’re good, I’m covered now.”

Lux let out the breath she’d been holding and turned just in time for Jinx’s hoodie to hit her in the face.

“Oh shit sorry! I was just trying to go for a light pass I swear.”

Lux couldn’t help but start laughing, and after a moment Jinx laughed too. Another breeze shut them both up, and Lux put the hoodie on. The moment it set at her shoulders she knew something wasn’t quite right.

It was huge on her. The sleeves went past her hands, and the bottom hem nearly made it to her thighs. It was so warm though, and immediately she felt a bit better. She prepared however for Jinx to make fun of her for how stupid it looked. When she met Jinx’s eyes however, Jinx wasn’t about to laugh. In fact, she looked kind of stunned.

“Hey? What’s wrong?”

Her voice seemed to pull Jinx from her stupor, and her companion looked away, moving a hand to rub the back of her neck, drawing Lux’s eyes to the incredible definition of her lithe biceps, and the connection at her shoulder and armpit.

“I-It’s nothing. Let’s get to my truck already.”

Hmm. She swore Jinx’s face was a bit red. Must’ve been flush from the cold, since she wasn’t wearing a hoodie anymore.

--

The drive to the corner store was quick and easy, and thankfully Lux managed to get proper materials before her makeshift solution fell apart. Jinx only made fun of her two more times (which she supposed wasn’t as bad as it could’ve been) and after Jinx picked up a few items as well (For some reason knowing why Jinx was buying condoms was even more embarrassing than what her initial assumption would have been) they headed back to campus.

It was back to a kind of weird, pleasant, dislike. Jinx was annoying, Jinx was annoyed by her, they managed to get along. Jinx was making the getting along part hard however, with those vulgar jokes, and saying weird things, and… she’d been over it before. But it was still better than how they’d been earlier in the day.

They were walking across the black paved streets of the Golden Views, Piltover Academy’s apartment complex, when a sudden voice made them both jump.

“Apple Butter?! Apple Butter, come here boy!”

It was high pitched and feminine, projecting with a surprising amount of force. Wait a second… She knew that voice.

A figure ran out just a few meters in front of them, a bit obscured by the void of night around them. Enough light was coming from the humming street lamps that Lux could make it a few flashes of pink. The figure turned in their direction.

“Oh my gosh is that you Lux?”

Seraphine jogged up towards them, pink wavy hair bobbing in its messy ponytail behind her. Even in apparent nightwear she was visually stunning. She wore a pair of black yoga pants with the word “Pretty” spelled out in pink sparkly letters, and a pair of white and pink joggers just below. Above she had a K/DA tank top that did little to hide her cleavage. Lux did her best not to stare, although she doubted Jinx was making that courtesy.

“Hi Sera. Why are you out here right now? It’s 9 on a Monday.”

Seraphine made an exasperated sigh before plonking herself down into Lux’s arms (which nearly knocked her over as Seraphine was two inches taller)

“My cat Apple Butter got out and I’ve got no Idea where he went! I’m trying to get a head start on our music theory homework but I can’t get anything done unless I know he’s safe.”

Lux pushed her off to stand on her own two feet before looking her in the eyes. Gosh she was pretty.

“Okay, first off that’s an adorable name for a cat (“I know right?”) and secondly, how long ago did he get out?”

“About 10 minutes I think. I was just getting the door for my roommate and he zoomed out! Do you think you could help me Lux? I hope you and your friend aren’t busy but I'm like about to have a breakdown over this and if I can’t get him back tonight I’m gonna freak. Please?”

Stronger women than Lux couldn’t say no to begging from Seraphine. She turned to Jinx, who unsurprisingly looked displeased, and shrugged. Jinx just rolled her eyes.

“Yeah, we can help you find Apple Butter, Sera.”

“Oh my gosh thank you two so much!”

She went in and pecked Lux on the cheek, and suddenly did the same to Jinx who seemed actually startled by it.

“He’s black with white socks, and he’s got a lil white patch around his eye. Call me if you find him okay? I don’t think he would’ve gone too far. Thanks again. Apple Butter?! Baby Boy, where are you?!”

And with that she took off in the direction Lux and Jinx had come from.

Jinx turned to her.

“Damn girl, how many people are after your panties?”

It was Lux’s turn to facepalm.

“She’s like that with everybody, come on. And stop making weird jokes already.”

Jinx shrugged, a smirk on her face.

“If you say so. How do you know peppy peggy anyway?”

“She’s in my music theory class this semester, and she was in my classical music history class last semester. I wouldn’t really call us friends, we hung out once and that’s it. She’s nice, and she’s a really talented musician. And stop giving people weird nicknames you cretin!”

Jinx turned her head back to where Seraphine had run off to.

“Hmm. Weird. She kinda reminds me of someone. Couldn’t be though.” she looked back to Lux, clapping her hands. “Alright, let’s find Apple Butter.”

--

Finding a black cat in the dark, Lux learned, was not as easy as she hoped it was. Even with both her and Jinx looking, it took about another 15 minutes of wandering around the complex, calling out for Apple Butter before Jinx stopped her. She froze and looked up towards her partner, and silently Jinx motioned forward to where her phone light was pointed.

There he was. Apple Butter.

He was currently in a knocked over trash can, snacking on the leftovers of another tenant, blissfully unaware of his owner’s search.

“Here’s what we do.” Jinx whispered. “You walk towards him from the front, I’m gonna swing around this house and jump him from behind. Just keep him distracted and don’t scare him off okay?”

Before Lux responded Jinx took off, leaving Lux in darkness as Jinx had been the one using her phone flashlight. Lux pulled out her own phone and went to turn the light on.

Her phone was dead. And she was alone in the dark.

After a few moments of paralyzed fear, she started to move forward. The lamps behind her cast a long flicking shadow of her form into the thin alleyway between buildings, giving it the look of an elongated black and white horror film set, like something she’d sneak downstairs to watch with Garen when they were kids.

She hated it.

But Seraphine needed her cat, and Jinx needed her help. As much as this looked eerily similar to her childhood nightmares, she couldn’t just stand there. She took a few more steps, trying her best not to think about the cliche organ music that unnerved her to the bone for years and years, and never really stopped doing so.

She was brave, she wasn’t going to stop, Jinx was counting on her. Just, slow steps. Her hands were shaking like crazy. She practically felt something watching her from behind. She squeezed Jinx’d hoodie close and closed her eyes.

“It’s in your head.” She whispered Garen’s words back to herself. “There’s nothing behind you, it’s in your head. It’s in your head. It’s in-”

There was a metallic banging and she nearly shrieked, just barely catching herself before she did. She could see the trash can from this close, and there Apple Butter had exited, and apparently noticed her. It was do or die.

“Hi buddy.” Her voice was barely audible, shaking with a new found instinct to run. “You know your owner is really scared looking for you. So, why don’t you come here, okay?”

Apple Butter did not seem amused. It probably didn’t help that she was oozing fear.

“Come on boy. C’mere Apple Butter. Pspspspsp.”

That actually seemed to get him to move. Away from Lux and towards the side where no light from the street was reaching.

“No, no not there, towards me dangit.”

Apparently her words were louder than it liked, and Apple Butter was about to take flight.

“Gotcha!”

Rolling out from the side like a timber wolf on the hunt, Jinx moved forward like a flash and scooped up Apple Butter in her arms, tumbling ever so slightly but making sure he wasn’t hurt. He started meowing and fighting in Jinx’s arms, but she had a pretty serious hold on him. Oh thank the gods.

“Alright you stink boy.” She spoke. “Let’s get you back to your hot owner.”

Lux was still too freaked out to even acknowledge that. Jinx stood up and much to Lux’s pleasure turned on her flashlight.

“You did great Lux, we make a pretty decent team. Man that was exciting, been a while since I- Lux? You okay? You look really shaken up.”

“Let’s just get back to my room as soon as we can please.”

As they walked to return the cat, Lux realized something.

She’d been gripping onto Jinx’s hoodie the whole time.

--

Seraphine was ecstatic to have her cat back, and gave both Jinx and Lux another kiss each, which Jinx seemed far less opposed to this time. She was such a weirdo. (Lux elected to ignore Seraphine’s smug grin when she realized Lux’s hoodie obviously belonged to Jinx)

The walk back to the dorms Lux spent practically attached to Jinx’s hip, and very thankfully Jinx didn’t ask, like she just understood. Once back inside, Lux returned the hoodie to its owner, and after a bit of debate the two agreed that they’d done enough work tonight, and Jinx went home. Lux spent the whole night running her hands across where the hoodie had been most prominent, and thinking about the new layers and parts to Jinx she’d learned about. Not in a weird way of course.

Wednesday came soon enough, and Jinx wasn’t able to work on their project that day. Apparently she promised to play a game with her sister or something. They seemed close, kind of like her and Garen.

Once she was done with classes however, she received a text from Jinx.

// Jinx: Hey so I forgot my hoodie at your place. Can you give it back to me on Friday? //

Lux immediately tore apart her room to find where Jinx had left it, and quickly found it hiding under a folded blanket. How it got there who knew and who cared. She immediately put it on and layed down in bed.

// Lux: Sure! I’ll get it back to you safe and sound. //

// Jinx: Thanks. Just don’t do anything suspicious with it perv. //

// Lux: Stop being gross! //

// Jinx: >:3 //

Lux rolled her eyes. So freaking aggravating. She let out a huff and fell back down, pulling the hoodie up close and sniffling. Her eyes went wide as a realization hit her. The hoodie… Jinx probably wore it a lot right? So it might…

She hesitantly pulled the collar up, and plunged her nose into the soft fabric. And she took a deep intake of breath.

Oh Gods.

Cigarettes. Trees and Mulch. Motor Oil. Jinx.

“Fuck…”

She didn’t say it often but there was no other word to describe the rush of sensations that hit her body. She took the scent in again. And again. And again. Everytime it overwhelmed her and left her feeling warm and confused and dizzy.

What… What was she doing? This was so weird, she was being a total creep right now. But oh man it smelled so good. She could do this for hours.

The ringing of her phone ripped her away from those thoughts. It was Garen. Crud.

She took a moment to compose herself from whatever enchantment the hoodie had placed on her, and answered.

“Hello?”

“Hey Lux, it’s Garen. But you saw that obviously.”

He was such a goof.

“Hey Big Bro. What’s up? Need something?”

“Well, I actually called a few days ago but you must’ve missed it.”

Shit, she totally forgot.

“Oh geez, yeah I saw that but some stuff was going on and I couldn’t really call back.”

“Hey, it’s okay. I was busy until now anyway. So, I just wanted to chat about school, or, hobbies or… I can’t do this. Listen Lux, I’m calling about Father.”

Lux froze in place.

“W-What about Father?”

“Well, he’s been talking with Mother, and… well… They were talking about the marriage proposal for you. You know. The one with Jarvan.”

She knew. She knew plenty.

“And?”

Garen cleared his breath before speaking, but gods she wish he’d just say it. She hated this pit that had forced itself into her stomach.

“Father wants to go through with it. Mother thinks you should complete your studies first. But, she also wants you to come home to do it.”

Anger started to rise up in her throat.

“Is that everything, Brother?”

She heard Garen breath slowly on the other end.

“Listen I don’t agree with them, you clearly are doing great in Piltover. And I don’t think you should marry Jarvan either, but I’ve made that very clear to our parents and they seem less than interested in my opinion. You know how they get.” Again, She knew plenty. “Look, I just wanted to give you a heads up. I don’t know what they’ll decide but I want you to be prepared for what they do, and how you want to handle it. Whatever you pick, I’ll back you up. I promise.”

It was Lux’s turn to take a deep breath. Crownguard compulsion she guessed.

“Okay… Thanks Big Bro. I’m sorry I got snippy with you.”

“Hey, it’s alright. You’re in a worse situation than I’m in. And I don’t know if it’s going anywhere but if legality becomes an issue I actually met a really good lawyer at a business event not too long ago. Trust me, she’s a doozy, she slices up grown men like they were yesterday's recruits. Things go to shit, maybe she can help.”

“Okay. Again, thanks Garen. I love you”

“Anything for you Sis. Love you too.”

She hung up first and let the phone drop to the bed.

This couldn’t be happening. After all the work she put into getting here they were just going to take her away? Take her back to a big fancy prison where she’d never meet anyone like Sera, or Ezreal, or Jinx again? It was… it was…

“FUCKING BULLSHIT!”

Her words wrung out, echoing off her pained vocal cords from the scream. Tears started to drip from her eyes and land on the sheets below. Her fists balled up and she resisted the urge to throw something. Control Lux, control… she needed control, needed to be in control, needed to handle this with control. She… She…

She wasn’t in control. She hated this feeling more than anything in the world. Everything she worked for, the life she wanted and could feel just inches away being ripped apart by someone who had the power to take everything from her with a snap. It was unfair, it wasn’t okay, it shouldn’t be allowed, it- it…

The immediate anger faded, leaving her instead with a new smoldering fire in her stomach. She refused to let them win. Whatever she could do, she would not lose this chance.

She managed to calm herself down after a while of those deep cathartic breaths. She really surprised herself with that scream though. She never would have swore like this before. Jinx must’ve been affecting her.

…

Jinx…

…

That was it!

She grabbed her phone and scrolled through her contacts until she saw the girl and started typing rapidly. Fuck what her parents wanted. She had control, and she would prove it.

// Lux: Hey are you still going to that concert, where your friend is playing? The one this Friday? //

// Jinx: Yeah why //

Lux grinned.

// Lux: I’m in. //

Chapter Text

-Jinx-

--

7:10. Lux was officially ten minutes late. Jinx sat in the seat of her truck tapping the tips of her fingers against her dashboard while her other hand flicked her lighter on and off, watching the flame sit for a few moments before snuffing it out. She had told Lux rather explicitly that she was gonna show up at 7. Lux had enthusiastically agreed, and yet here they were. Not that she really gave a shit, just every single second after that threshold became a new bullet for her to badger Lux with, and Jinx would never refuse a loaded chamber like that.

She slowly exhaled a stream of smoke from her lips, the cigarette hitting in all the right ways considering she wasn’t allowed to bring shimmer to this party. She had managed to get some weed thankfully, but her seller had been stingy, and she didn’t get nearly as much as she would have liked. Her brow furrowed a little bit as thoughts drifted over the topic of shimmer, and how angry Ekko had become over it. He was justified, sure, and so was Vi, and Cait (ew), and all of Ekko’s pals, and probably Lux even though they hadn’t talked about that. She knew it was a justified anger, and if it was so simple as just stopping, she would’ve.

But it wasn’t that fucking simple. She didn’t ask to become a fucking addict. It’s not her fault dear old dead Dad wanted her alive so much he let a psycho maniac with a needle pump her up with enough shimmer to kill an elephant. It wasn’t her fault that for a fucking week she was forced to scrounge up as much shimmer as she could and desperately try to stop herself from dying. It wasn’t her fault it… it wasn’t her fault.

Bad habit of thinking about addiction kicking in, Jinx immediately felt her pulse quicken, the thumping against her temples get quicker and more demanding. That aching sensation that would suddenly change to one of ecstasy as the shimmer finally made its way to her brain, filling her eyes with a warm glow and making every pump of her heart feel like a fucking orgasm over and over again. Her elbows and knees started to ache and feel weak at the thought of plunging the needle in. She nearly dropped her Lighter from it.

Maybe she could just call it off. Vi wasn’t home tonight, she could just drive back, put on her favorite anime and just… Fuck no no that’s not a good idea. And besides, Lux wanted to go to the concert. Not that she cared if Lux wanted to go or not but, Jinx’d be a major asshole if she bailed on her. She stuffed her lighter back into her pocket and took the cigarette from her mouth, tapping it out onto the asphalt parking lot before dropping it in her ashtray. Suddenly smoking was a lot less appealing. Much to the mercy of her boredom however, she saw Lux coming out of the campus gate and towards her truck. As she got closer to the truck, Jinx got a better view of her. Her heart practically stopped.

Lux was wearing a pair of deep navy blue high waisted cargo pants with a heavy looking belt securing them and tucked into that was a very loose-fitting white sweater, one side of it hanging down and revealing her shoulder, as well as the pink strap of a bra. Below she wore a simple pair of converse and slung at her side was that messenger bag she always had her camera in, that also seemed to hold all her other important things. She walked with this regal elegance that did not at all fit the event they were going to. And Jinx couldn’t look away.

Her free hand moved to cover her mouth by instinct as she breathed out.

“Fuck…”

A whole night around Lux like this. At a party where they’d be dancing and sweating and drinking and… Shit that wasn’t good. Why did women have to be so hot? The closer she got the more Jinx had to try and eject the panic from her body. Be cool be cool, just because she looked amazing didn’t change anything. Lux was obviously straight, so it wasn’t like Jinx had a chance there anyway. But gods if she could just have one night, she would rock this blonde bitch’s world.

Lux was close enough to wave at the window now, and Jinx gave her a finger gun back, trying to pretend like she hadn’t just gone through all 5 stages of grief. She walked around to the other side of the truck and pulled open the door, giving Jinx another cute little wave. How the fuck was Jinx supposed to drive like this?

“Hey.” Lux said, climbing up and taking her seat next to Jinx.

“Sup.” Jinx responded, praying desperately it wasn’t obvious how floored she was.

“Heyo.” Ezreal said, pulling himself into the truck.

Right. Ezreal. All of that panicked energy left Jinx in an instant as the sudden urge to search for an open grave hit her. He was wearing some stupid looking brown aviator jacket over a t-shirt, skinny jeans (blegh!) and a pair of red sneakers. Why the fuck had she agreed to let this boytoy idiot come along.

--

That morning Jinx and Lux sat in Professor Viktor’s class, going over the details of the concert. It was mostly Jinx briefing Lux so that miss sheltered didn’t explode on impact.

“So, there’s gonna be drinking, probably weed but nothing more, smoking, a lot of people crowded around dancing around, couldn’t hurt to have some like Band-Aids and shit. I mean it’s like an old fuckin building on the wharf a stone throw away to the sea, if you aren’t careful you might get cut or some shit so I don’t know just have like useful shit with you.”

Lux looked up from her notepad, where she was apparently taking notes, to give Jinx a thumbs up.

“Be prepared. Got it.”

“Oh and, listen, just don’t be weird, ok? I’ll probably know some of these people, and if you make it weird, they’re gonna put it on me. Just stay close, listen to the music, maybe have a drink, and try not to get yourself killed. Sound good?”

Lux’s expression changed to a look of ‘is getting killed a possibility?’ and Jinx could only sigh. She just had to pray Lux knew how to keep to herself and not cause any trouble and everything would be fine. Ekko’s crowd usually wasn’t dangerous anyway, so it probably wasn’t worth worrying about but… something just felt like it was going to go bad. Like there was an 85% chance Lux somehow got herself into a dumb situation and Jinx would have to come in and save her. Actually, that didn’t sound too bad. Maybe Lux would be all infatuated with her hero, and then-

“Hey,” Lux interrupted the thought. “Do you think Ezreal can come along with us?”

“What? Why? No. He obviously can’t, if you weren’t the one to kill my rep it would be him. And again, I ask fucking why? I thought he annoyed you.”

Lux put a hand to her forehead and gestured at the air as she spoke.

“Well, he kept asking me about this other house party or something that he wanted me to go to, so I figured well now I have an excuse because we’re going to the concert. So, I told him that and he asked if he could come with us instead. And no, just because I said he can be a bit much, does not mean he’s annoying.”

“Asking to go to a concert you weren’t invited to is pretty annoying.” Jinx said.

“Look I’m bad at saying no to people, ok? It’s just one night, and it’s not like he’s gonna follow us around the whole time. Please, Jinx? I don’t want to accidentally burn bridges with people, and it would be a lot easier for me if you just let him hang out with us. He’s not that bad, I promise. It would mean a lot to me.” Lux reached forward and put her hand on Jinx’s after she finished speaking, her eyes formed into a well-practiced sad kitten look.

This should not be allowed. You can’t touch a gal’s hand like that when you know she likes girls and give her that look. If Lux did that intentionally, Jinx needed to give this siren more credit. The worst part was, if it was any other like somewhat attractive rich girl, Jinx would’ve just refused. But she was a gay idiot, and Luxanna Crownguard was hard to say no to.

“Fine,” She said with a huff “Ezreal can come with. But I swear if he says one thing that causes problems, I’m denying any involvement and leaving his ass there.”

Lux smiled and gave Jinx’s hand a squeeze (Jinx suppressed the intake of breath her body tried to have).

“Thank you so much! I promise that he won’t cause any problems.”

Fucking damnit. Stupid sexy Lux and her stupid sexy eyes and stupid sexy hair.

“Yeah sure. Whatever.”

--

Jinx was regretting her decision to let Ezreal come with. Or, she was, until Lux got situated in the middle of the bench seat, exposed shoulder brushing against Jinx’s ever so slightly. Never mind. Ezreal coming was no longer an issue and in fact he could stay on that side of the car as long as he wanted.

“Sorry we’re late.” Lux said, putting her bag down between her legs. “I was having trouble deciding what to wear. I don’t know what you’re… y’know… supposed to dress like for something like this.”

“It’s whatever. And I mean you look grea- Fine! Fine, you look fine.”

Lux blushed a bit and reached a hand up, fingers twirling at a strand of hair.

“Thanks.”

Fuck.

“You look… interesting too. That’s a neat choker.”

Jinx reached up and tugged against the heavy leather collar around her neck, giving Lux a wink.

“You like seeing me in a collar, blondie?”

Lux rolled her eyes and lightly punched Jinx on the shoulder.

“Cut it out, and you wish. But I’m just saying I like your outfit too. Seems more Apropos than what I’m wearing.”

Jinx regarded her own clothes, although it wasn’t anything different than what she would normally wear. She had her favorite black jeans on, with her boots, the pre-mentioned leather collar, her beanie, and a tight sleeveless crop top. Had she chosen that shirt because of how red Lux had gotten when she took her hoodie off a few days ago? Fucking duh. If her body was sharp enough to pull a few embarrassed glances from Lux, she was going to use the hell out of that.

“I mean, if you want,” Jinx said, “we could swing by my house on the way there and you could pick something more ‘apropos’ from my closet.”

Lux’s cheeks got all red again, apparently the idea of trying on Jinx’s clothes was too much for her brain.

“N-Nope nope I’m fine that’s-that’s a nice offer but I am okay for now.”

Jinx couldn’t help but grin watching her get so flustered. And this close she couldn’t hide it at all. Thanks, Ezreal!

“So” Ezreal said, “Is girl talk over yet, or are we gonna get this show on the road?”

Fuck you, Ezreal! Bitch was no longer allowed to stay on that side of the car as long as he wanted. Lux mouthed a ‘sorry’ at Jinx, who decided just once she’d spare him. But he did have a point, they were already gonna be late (Though it was completely worth it to see Lux in that outfit).

Without a word of acknowledgement, Jinx brought the car out of park and, as jerkily as she could to try and make Ezreal sick, drove her way out of the campus lot.

Unfortunately, they weren’t as lucky as the last time Jinx and Lux had driven somewhere together, and traffic was everywhere. Made sense considering it was a Friday night, people were either trying to get home from work, or get their party on. Which, for someone like Jinx, made things incredibly fucking boring. Sitting in tight back city streets just trying to make it down to Zaun was the worst, and while it was nice to have Lux literally up against her arm, Ezreal made most conversations unbearable.

Lux and Jinx started to talk about schoolwork? Ezreal had to comment on what he knew about civil engineering. Lux asked Jinx about what kind of music Ekko played? Ezreal had to comment on what he thought about music. Jinx talked? Ezreal commented. Lux talked? Ezreal commented, and commented, and commented, and fucking hell this guy was the worst.

And the worst part was that Lux just seemed to weather it, maybe even nod or follow his stem of conversation, as if it wasn’t the most aggravating thing on the planet. And whenever she did, he got sooo excited, weirdo was about to bust a nut just being in the same fucking truck as her. She couldn’t wait to ditch him once they finally got to the concert. Her and Lux could lose him in the mosh pit, then when the firelights stopped playing her and Lux could go hang with them for the rest of the night while the next band played, and they wouldn’t have to deal with his stupid face till they left.

While they were sitting at a particularly long line trying to pull off an exit, Jinx tried to stretch her legs out, accidentally bumping Lux’s camera bag.

“Oh my god.” Jinx said. “Why the fuck is that thing so heavy?”

Lux frowned and picked it up.

“You told me to be prepared.”

“Yeah, be prepared for a long concert night, not a nuclear war. What do you even have in there?”

Lux started to rummage through the bag, pulling a few things out as if to prove she had them.

“Phone and wallet, first aid kit, lighter, two water bottles and chips just in case, a blanket, industrial flashlight, some fl-”

“Hold the fucking phone.” Jinx put a hand on Lux’s shoulder. “An industrial flashlight.”

Lux nodded and pulled a heavy looking yellow and blue flashlight from the bag with a smile.

“Blondie why the fuck would you think you need that?”

Lux almost seemed offended at the notion.

“Because, Jinx, the last time we hung out late in the night, I ended up alone, in the pitch-black, in an alleyway with a really creepy feel to it, while you stalked around to catch Apple Butter. So, forgive me if I want to have a flashlight for when you abandon me in the dark again.”

Jinx couldn’t help blurting out a laugh, tossing her head back gently into the headrest as she did.

“W-Why are you laughing?”

“Are you kidding me? That’s fucking hilarious dude! A fucking industrial flashlight holy shit, who just has one of those lying around? And then brings it to a fucking concert? That’s priceless. You know what, you have been officially promoted from blondie to flashlight, flashlight. God, damn I haven’t laughed like this in a while.”

Lux looked even more adorable when she got all angry like this. The good kind of angry, not her scary smoldering passive aggressive kind of angry.

“Jinx! What kind of nickname is flashlight? And It’s not funny.”

“Actually, it is pretty funny.” Ezreal said.

Jinx stopped laughing.

“No, flashlight is right, it really isn’t funny anymore.”

Lux sighed and put the flashlight away, dropping the bag between her legs again. Jinx reached down towards the clutch and grabbed her drink from the cupholder, taking a deep sip.

“What’s that?” Lux asked.

Jinx pulled the can from her lips and turned it to face her.

“Chem-Power, it’s like an energy drink. Wanna try it?”

Lux eyed the can suspiciously, no doubt disturbed by the illustration of what appeared to be a dragon breathing weird green fire onto a bunch of stick figures. Jinx never really understood the branding either. Eventually she shrugged.

“Why not, I guess.”

“Atta girl.” Jinx said, handing over the can.

Lux took it, giving it another untrusting expression before lifting the can up. She stopped at the last moment, eyes flickering towards Jinx causing her face to get a bit red. The hell? Before Jinx could think about it any longer Lux took a sip. The moment it was in her mouth her eyes went wide and she practically ripped the can away, an unreadable expression on her face.

“Sooo. What did you think?”

Lux opened her mouth to speak before closing it again, apparently pondering the Chem-Power.

“It’s um… It’s really sour.”

“Fuck yeah it’s sour, shit is practically liquid sour candy.”

Lux regarded it one more time, took another sip as if she was just making sure, then shook her head, handing it back to Jinx.

“Yeah, not a fan.”

Jinx shrugged and took a long swig, relishing in both the disgusted and worried face Lux made.

“Your loss, blondie.” She said, wiping the battery acid cocktail from her lips

“I thought I was flashlight now.”

“Oh shit, you’re right. Fuck it, you’re both flashlight and blondie.”

“Hey,” Ezreal cut in, “can I try it? I-”

“Nope.”

Again, moment with Lux ruined. She hated Lux, but that’s because Lux was a dork, and it was really cute. She hated Ezreal because he was an insufferable idiot who thought he was cool enough to act like a frat bound fuck boy even though he was obviously a complete virgin who was chasing a girl who did not like him. This was going to be a long fucking night.

--

Finally, their motley crew of three made it to the venue, an old, abandoned fishing building, or maybe a storage place, just off the wharf. You could smell the salty water coming in from the breeze and hear the faint sound of music coming from inside. Jinx hopped out of her truck and stretched, preparing herself for the adrenaline rush she was about to get hit with. Lux followed her lead, looking even more nervous than before.

“What’s wrong, flashlight?” She asked, cracking her neck.

Lux looked up at her and gave a weak smile.

“Just, you know. I-It’s just my first time. Doing something like this I mean.”

Jinx decided not to acknowledge how the first statement sounded for Lux’s sake.

“Hey, it’ll be fine. Just stick by my side and nothing will go wrong. Try to relax and have some fun, I mean that’s why we’re here.”

Lux took a deep breath and nodded.

“Ok. I trust you.”

She fucking shouldn’t though. Jinx hadn’t realized what a bad idea this was, as if she had forgotten her namesake. Jinx. Things could absolutely go wrong; they were in Zaun’s ‘seedy underbelly’ and there were plenty of people who spent time in that area that hated Jinx. Rivals or victims of Silco, dealers she had screwed, people she’d fucked (over and literally). This was such a bad fucking idea and letting Lux tag along only made it worse. And even though he actually sucked, the thought of Ezreal getting hurt because she let him come was also less than pleasant.

But they were here now, and Lux wanted to go. No way in hell she would back out after telling Lux it would be ok. All she could do was pray that there were none of Glasc’s higher ups, none of Renni’s goons, or Corina’s goons, or… shit that was actually a lot of people. But if the Firelights were here surely the more asshole selection of Zaun were staying away, right?

Only one way to find out.

“Alright, let’s go.”

The building was mostly made of stone brick foundations, large walls that looked far older than any modern building even in the Sumps, urban decay having creeped its way around carving chunks of stone flesh away from its core. It actually kind of looked like a big, destroyed church you’d see in a dark fantasy RPG, Jinx figured. Inside would be a big skeleton with a pope hat who threw purple magic shit at you, and killing him would unlock the door to move on to the poison swamp area. Maybe Lux had a secret thing for those kinds of games. Maybe they could even play together.

She was getting off topic. The closer they got the more she could hear the muffled music coming from the building. Though with the walls so worn down, she would have expected to hear the music a lot better. Or see some flashing lights. Or even see people. But despite the row of assorted vehicles in the same place her truck now sat, there was no one.

Paranoia started to creep into Jinx’s brain. What if this was a set up? Lux’s parents were wealthy, right? And Jinx had left a bad record of unhappy customers when Dad hit the dust. Had they paid off Ekko? There was no way, Ekko was so against that kind of shit, and he would never betray Jinx like that. Or… would he? She had fucked up hard by selling to Ran, not to mention the other ways Jinx had fucked up their relationship. Did he finally decide enough is enough, and thought this was the best way to deal with Jinx? The music should be louder, there should be people, there should be lights, there should-

“Jinx?”

Jinx reached down to her hip on instinct as her head shot towards the sound, but she flinched when her fingers didn’t meet textured acrylic. Lux was looking at her, a distinct look of worry in her eyes. Ezreal was looking too, though he was looking at her like she was a crazy person. Honestly the first valid thing he’s done.

“Jinx are you ok?” She asked, reaching a hand towards Jinx. “You look a bit freaked out, and you keep turning around and looking over your shoulder. What’s wrong?”

A sudden metal clanging had Jinx spinning again and backing up. From around the corner of the building came a mangy looking dog, pushing around an old tire rim. Fuck. Shit, gods fucking damnit. Fuck all of this.

Something touched her shoulder and again she nearly jumped away. She stopped when she saw it was Lux’s fingers on her shoulder.

“Hey.” She spoke, her tone softer than expected. “It’s me Jinx. It’s Lux. Can you tell me what’s wrong, please? Are we in danger? Do we need to leave?”

Before she could answer, suddenly the front door of the building opened, and a figure stumbled out. A tall guy with darker skin, and the typical attire you’d expect to see at this kind of concert. He had bright green hair pulled back into a ponytail, and what Jinx could tell were firelight tattoos on both his arms.

“Yoo.” He said with a wave, before turning away from them, apparently pissing on the wall next to the door.

Jinx took a deep breath and swallowed hard. That about settled it, she freaked out over nothing. She looked at Lux and shook her head.

“No. We’re not. Sorry. I… I haven’t been high in a few days, that’s all. It’s messing with me. Yeah.”

Despite giving a lie that convinced no one, Lux nodded and pulled her hand away.

“Ok. Should we head inside, or do you need a minute?”

The tight thumping in Jinx’s chest was still there, and it wasn’t loosening any time soon. Fuck it, she needed to take her mind off all that shit.

“I’m fine. Let’s get in there, I guess.”

Without waiting for acknowledgement, she walked past the pissing man and opened the door up. From below her she could feel the vibration of the floorboards against her boots. Ah, that explained it, the concert must’ve been in this place's cellar. How stupid was she, thinking that she was about to be jumped. Fucking hell.

The building was actually a lot nicer on the inside, a few windows on the far side that didn’t look as collapsed allowed a stream of last sunlight to slip through, giving the room an ephemeral radiance. So, the big skeleton with the pope hat would also cast golden healing spells along with the purple shit or something. She let out a chuckle at the thought.

“Wow.” Lux’s voice came from behind her. “This place looks great. This would make for an awesome photoshoot.”

“Ohh totally.” Ezreal said, jogging over to one of the wooden banisters. “Here, I bet I would look sick posing on one of these. I’ve been told I’m a natural born model.”

Lux laughed that addicting, pretty laugh again.

“Maybe in your dreams, Ez.”

Jinx smiled at that one too. She needed to take a chill pill. Not even just on the situation but just, everything. Lux, Ezreal, Ekko, what the fuck was the point of being here if she wasn’t here to have fun. As she glanced around the place, her eyes centered on a big wooden trap door.

“I think I just found our concert.”

--

The bottom of the spiral staircase ended in a long thin hallway, music much louder than before, the distorted and dissonant chords of electric guitars ringing making themselves most prominent. As she hit the end of the hallway, again there was a wooden door. She turned back to Lux and Ezreal, giving them a grin.

“You ready?”

They both nodded, and she pushed open the door.

The music blared further to life, hitting all three of them with a blast of energy and rhythm. Inside the venue was way bigger than just the inside of the destroyed building, stretching at least twice the size. At the other end of the room stood a raised platform where a band Jinx didn’t recognize was currently on display, the singer pulling out impressive and haunting melodies to match his guitarists. Flashing green and red lights were blasting around from above the makeshift stage, casting everything in the lighting you’d expect more from a club.

In front of them was where most of the people were, a divot with 3 stairs down on each side that made for a really convenient mosh pit. On all three walls around said pit were tables, couches, and chairs, some occupied and some empty, filled with people laughing and drinking. To their left was one big, long table with a bunch of stools on one side, and three people on the other side with a ton of coolers behind them. A makeshift bar, fuck yeah.

This. Was. Great. The energy was fucking electric, and she was already so stoked to hear the Firelights. She walked forward a bit and turned, making a deep bow towards Lux.

“My lady,” She said in her posh voice “May I invite you into a most debaucherous locale.”

Lux looked incredibly overwhelmed, but still giggled at Jinx’s words. She took a few steps inside and looked around, a mix of wonderment and sudden anxiety in her eyes. Ezreal seemed much less scared, and immediately as he walked in his eyes hit the bar.

“Hey, I’m gonna grab a beer. You two want anything?”

“Only if I’m not paying.” Jinx responded.

“Umm…” Lux looked between the two of them before sighing. “I guess yeah. Don’t get me something strong though. And make sure it’s sweet?”

Ezreal nodded.

“Something weak and sweet for our golden-haired beauty.” (Jinx had to stop herself from barfing) “How about you Jinx? Any requests.”

“Tahm’s lemonade if they have it, cherry flavor.”

He nodded, and then wandered off, leaving Lux and Jinx alone for the first time in the evening.

And of course, Jinx had no idea what to say. Thankfully Lux took the initiative. She moved closer to Jinx and spoke just loudly enough that Jinx could hear.

“You ok?”

Wow. She was actually kind of surprised Lux asked that. She didn’t know why, Lux would ask anyone if they were ok after something bad but, still. Most people liked to ignore her episodes.

“Yeah, I’m okay now that we're here. Thanks blondie. By the way, those are some killer survival instincts you got there. First thing you asked when you saw me freak out was ‘are we in danger.’ The hell did you learn that?”

Lux grimaced and cocked her head to the side.

“When your parents are rich politicians, you tend to get taught things other kids aren’t. Call me naive, but I know how to handle a situation where I might be in trouble. Benefits of being taught about how to escape a kidnapping, I suppose.”

“Damn. That’s kinda fucked up.”

Lux actually laughed.

“Yeah, it kinda is. What about you though? I don’t want to intrude, but I saw the way your hand moved to your belt. That was instinctual, right? Would… you be okay telling me how you got your survival instincts?”

Jinx froze up a bit, and she looked away from Lux.

“It’s… not really… I…” Jinx looked at Lux, and her eyes scanned up and down. Her hair was perfect. Her clothes were perfect. Her posture was perfect. She was perfect. She wouldn’t get it, even if they both had unorthodox childhoods. Jinx cleared her throat. “I don’t know what you mean.”

Lux’s brow furrowed ever so slightly, but before she had the chance to say anything, Ezreal cut in.

“Alright my ladies, I have thy drinks. A rare lemonade of Tahm Kench himself for Jinx, and a simple mango seltzer for Lux. Drink up.”

“Thanks man.” Jinx said before grabbing the bottle, eager to exit the conversation.

Lux took her drink as well, but her expression remained unsatisfied. Before anyone could say another word though, a fourth voice came from behind.

“Jinx! Hey, you made it.”

Jinx turned on her heel and smiled as Ekko walked up. He was wearing a pair of black cargo pants, and from under them he had a pair of leggings covering down to his sneakers. He had that big green bomber jacket on (His pan and enby pins on display), with a grey hoodie underneath. It all looked pretty fucking sick, though he usually did go all out when he performed.

Jinx grinned and held out a fist bump for him, which he accepted, before she spoke.

“I told you I’d be here. I’m a bit later than I wanted but I’m here. Traffic was shit and I had to pick up some extra cargo.” She gestured behind her with her chin to where Lux and Ezreal stood.

“Oh hey, wassup Lux? I wasn’t sure if you were coming or not.” He said, putting his fist out to her.

This time she didn’t shake it, and after seeing Jinx’s demonstration returned the fist bump (very awkwardly).

“Oh, yeah well, y’know I figured… Why not try something new? I guess.”

Ekko just nodded before looking at Ezreal.

“I don’t think we’ve met man. I’m Ekko.”

“H-Hey. What’s up dude. I’m Ezreal but you can just call me Ez. If you want. Or you can just call me Ezreal like y’know most people do or whatever, hehe…”

The fuck? Why did fake frat boy have a panic around Ekko? Intimated by the raw testosterone levels Ekko emitted? Actually, she didn’t want to know the answer to that, the risk of Ezreal saying “respect the alpha” was too real to even ponder the question.

“Uh, yeah. Sure thing Ez. Not to break you guys away, but you mind if I talk with Jay for a second? I just need to ask her about some stuff.”

Ezreal and Lux both gave a kind of awkward cacophony of sures and whatever’s before Ekko put a hand on Jinx’s shoulder and led her a bit away.

“So,” He said, “Brought a piltie and the rich girl huh? Thought you said Lux was too annoying.”

Fucking… How many times was that conversation going to haunt her?

“Yeah well… I mean she is annoying but… not in that kind of way… You pissed I let her come?”

“What? No way man, I don’t care. Just curious is all. Who you’re friends with is your shit, not mine. And this Ezreal guy, is he like the Ezreal?”

Jinx took a second to compile her disbelief before she answered.

“You fucking know him?”

“Not personally. Heard his name a bit ago. Apparently, he’s some prodigy archeologist, did an AMA like two months ago on a dig he assisted with in Shurima or something. He’s got a niche following apparently.”

That made too much sense honestly.

“So not only is he a frat boy wannabe, but he’s also a racist adventure movie wannabe with a bunch of other weird history nerds who fawn over him on twitter?”

Ekko laughed and shook his head.

“Nah, I think he’s legit. As in like, he’s not the kinda guy to dig up a skull from Shurima and then bring it back to the Piltover Academy. I think he only does projects where the stuff he finds goes to their rightful owners or whatever, with explicit permission. I don’t know how it works, I just read a few of the questions.”

Jinx nudged him with her elbow.

“Sounds like you’re a fan.”

“Not really, just surprised he’s here. Though if saying I’m his fan gets me between his legs maybe I am a fan.” Ekko said, turning his head back.

“Ugh, fucking gross dude he’s like the worst straight boy ever. Good fucking luck you weirdo.”

“If you hate him so much, why’d you invite him?”

Jinx sighed and leaned her head onto Ekko’s arm in exhaustion.

“Lux asked if he could come, and I didn’t want to say no.”

“You into her?”

Now there was a question. She shook her head.

“I don’t know man. I mean she’s hot as hell, so like duh I want to sleep with her but, even if I wanted more than that I have no chance. She’s straight as fuck.”

Ekko gave her a ‘hmm’ and a pat on the back.

“That’s rough, buddy.”

Before anything else could be said, a sudden “Ekko!” was yelled out from the crowd. Scar, that bat Vastaya Dilf who played Bass for the Firelights (And Jinx’s bass guitar rival), was waving his arms in the air.

“Ah shit, time’s almost up. I’ll be on soon, hey once we’re done you gotta hang with us alright? I’ll catch you later Jay.” Ekko unhooked his arm from Jinx and jogged off towards his bandmate. Jinx started to turn around but was stopped by Ekko’s voice again. “No shimmer, right?”

Her shoulders immediately tensed up, and her knees started to feel weak. Without saying a word, she gave him a thumbs up, walking back towards Lux. It hadn’t even occurred that Ezreal was gone until she was standing in front of Lux.

“Ez went to go get another drink.” Lux said upon her arrival. “Did you want to get closer to the music? I don’t know if I’m ready to fully go into the crowd but, baby steps, right?”

Jinx did her best to talk a few deep breaths and stop thinking about shimmer. Ekko was a fucking dick for saying that, even if she was a dick first. Stupid fucking…

“Yeah. Sure.”

Again, Lux gave her a frustrated look as the two of them walked a bit closer, not quite down in the most pit but enough that people were dancing around them. Which made it a little awkward since they were just standing there, drinking.

“Sooo… What’s up with you and Ekko?” Lux asked, having to raise her voice.

Oh, fucking come on. Jinx took a deep breath before replying.

“Nothing, if that’s what you’re implying. He’s just my old friend. That’s it.”

Lux eyed her up and down with a strange expression.

“Right, I forgot you’re only into girls.”

“Now hang on a second.” Jinx interrupted. “Never once did I say only. Men can be just as hot as women, as can anyone in between. I swing in every direction, flashlight, and I rarely miss.”

Lux gave her a look before nodding.

“Okay. Right. Got it, sorry. I didn’t mean to misrepresent you or anything. But there has to be some history there, right? He’s kind of touchy with you.”

The fuck was Lux’s problem all the sudden? Why was she asking about all this shit?

“History or not, it isn’t your business Lux, and I don’t want to talk about it. We’re just friends, that’s all you need to know. Moving on.”

Jinx elected not to focus on Lux’s frustrated expression, despite how much her sudden probing was starting to bother Jinx. Instead, she just downed the rest of her drink. Lux didn’t say anything after that, just nursed her drink as well, still standing close to Jinx however, as instructed.

Well, this was fucking awkward. Somehow, someway, her and Lux always found a way to piss the other one off it seemed. Jinx wracked her brain, trying to think of something to say to break the tension, but before she could manage, the band playing suddenly stopped and a chorus of cheers from the mosh pit erupted.

It took a few minutes for that band to empty the stage, and pretty much as soon as they did, Ekko hopped up. Cheers from the crowd wrung out upon seeing him, and he smiled and shot the audience a finger gun. Scar came up next, bass on his shoulder, then Ran and Kay, moving guitars, petal boards, and amps up, and finally Shomi came up from behind and started loading their drum kit.

Jinx smiled as she watched the Firelights set up. It hadn’t been that long ago that not a single person there would say a word to her, except Ran. But that was a different situation, Silco was her dad and Ran’s boss so they kind of had to interact. She wasn’t really sure if they were friends but, at the very least they talked. Well, until Jinx made them relapse. They hadn’t talked since then.

Finally, after setting all their equipment up, Ekko took the mic at the front, and threw a hand over the crowd.

“You people ready to thrash?”

The most pit erupted, and all at once the three guitarists hit a chord together, sending a completely different vibe from the last performance. A few distinct clicks of drumsticks rang out before a torrented mix of bass drum and toms ripped forward, slowed down, and then picked back up into a consistent rhythm. Ekko took a few steps back, leaning the mic stand down with him, his head down towards the ground. Then he tilted it up with a grin.

“Let’s fucking rock!”

And all at once the whole band erupted, guitars pushing forward with a gut punching opening rift, and the Bass Guitar laying down a fast and consistent foundation. The piece de resistance came when Ekko started to rap.

The mosh pit was already losing their minds over it, and Jinx was practically there herself. This must’ve been a new song, and fuck was it tasty. When Ekko broke from his rap and started to sing what she assumed was the chorus, she turned to Lux.

“Come on. Let’s get in there.”

Without waiting for an answer, she took the empty can from Lux’s hands and jogged to the nearest trash can, underhand tossing both empty drinks in. She ran back and grabbed Lux’s hand, pulling her into the mosh pit.

It was packed and hot, and almost immediately the different energy from down here washed over her.

“Fuck Yeah!” She tried to scream over the crowd, although it was likely only audible to Lux and one other person near them. She was so lost in the music already, closing her eyes and throwing her head back and forth, the high frantic energy of the Firelights making her thoughts drift away.

When she opened her eyes and looked over to Lux, unsurprisingly there was a look of overwhelmed confusion. Jinx rolled her eyes and grabbed Lux’s hand, pulling her attention to Jinx.

“Come on Blondie! Let fuckin loose!”

Lux’s eyes were wide as Jinx spoke, and after a few seconds she took one final look around before making eye contact again with Jinx. And then she smiled.

Slowly but surely Lux was eased more and more into the action, although Jinx noted right away, she did not know how to dance. Jinx laughed at her awkward movements for a few moments, and it only caused Lux to laugh as well.

“Stop thinking so much about it! Just fucking move, it doesn’t matter how!”

Lux started to follow Jinx’s lead, and by the time the first song came to a close she didn’t look nearly as out of place as she did before. And when the next song started with the same rough energy, Lux was fully into it. Her hair was all over the place as she danced, framing her in the green and red lights like she was meant to be there.

Jinx stopped dancing for a second and just stared. Why was her heart beating like that? Was it just adrenaline? This was different from attraction. She didn’t just want to fuck Lux, she wanted to kiss her, she wanted to hold her, she wanted to-

Her stream of thought was cut short when Lux turned and met her eyes, her movements suddenly grinding to a halt as well. And in the middle of a hyped up mosh pit they stared at each other. Jinx didn’t know how to look away.

Finally, she was jostled forward by someone behind her, sending her into Lux a bit, in turn causing someone to bump into Lux and send them right to where they were. Both of them erupted into laughter, and seamlessly they were pulled back into the music.

--

Almost a full hour later, the Firelights got off stage, and Lux and Jinx finally made their way out and crashed down onto an empty sofa. Panting and sweaty, they just stayed there for a while before Lux pulled out a water bottle and handed it to Jinx. She took it no question and started chugging.

“I bet you’re glad I brought all this stuff now.” Lux said, opening her own bottle.

“Shut it. And get those chips out, fuck, I need something in my stomach.”

Lux laughed and pulled out a bag of generic brand barbecue chips, ripping it open and placing it into the small gap between them. Jinx popped one in her mouth and leaned her head back, letting her adrenaline start to settle.

Hmm, Jinx was at a concert, on an empty stomach, sitting on a couch with Lux, exhausted. She reached into her back pocket and pulled out the plastic baggie she had purchased for this very occasion. Except, as she started to open it she glanced at Lux, head leaned back on the couch and eyes clothes, making long deep inhales and exhales.

Jinx put the weed away. She wasn’t sure why, just something made her feel like she shouldn’t. Her and Lux were already having a great time, so was there really a need to get high?

Instead, she just kept on munching on the chips, doing her best to ignore the tingling when her and Lux’s hands brushed each other while both reaching into the bag. Eventually they drained the chip supplies and finished off their waters, and the two of them were just left on the couch as a new act started to play. She should probably find Ekko but… she also really wanted to be alone with Lux. Ekko could wait a bit longer, right?

“We should probably make sure Ezreal is ok right? We did kind of leave him alone while he was getting a drink.”

Jinx rolled her eyes.

“I’m sure he’s fine, blondie. Why bother? Unless he’s a complete idiot he’ll be fine.”

“Do you have to be rude to him? He really isn’t as bad as you say.”

“He’s annoying and he’s gross. That’s all I need, isn’t it? Maybe if he stopped looking at you like a steak, I’d find him more tolerable.”

“Jinx he isn’t even doing that. Ok sure, maybe he has a crush on me or something. But it’s not like he’s ever said anything gross to me, and he’s always been polite and respectful around me. Maybe you should just get out of your own head for a change and stop assuming you know everything about everyone.”

Jinx scoffed and looked away.

“Sorry if I’m a little more cautious of creeps, guess living poor does that to you. Maybe you should stop being so naïve.”

There was a second where Lux seemed to catch herself before speaking, and after a deep breath she looked at Jinx.

“Let’s not do this, okay? I just had so much fun with you, a kind of fun I’ve never experienced before. I don’t want to fight.”

Jinx looked down to her boots for a few seconds before nodding.

“Yeah. Sorry. Just on edge, and when I’m on edge I speak without thinking.”

“I’ve noticed. But that’s part of what I admire about you, you know. You’re always willing to speak your mind no matter what. Even if it is usually a horrible idea.” Lux smiled at the end before standing up. “Now let’s make sure Ezreal isn’t 6 drinks deep.”

More like make sure something else wasn’t 6 deep in Ezreal. Ekko wins the award for worst taste in men.

“Alright, fine. Let’s go find twinky”

It didn’t take too terribly long thankfully, as he was still at the bar. And 4 beers deep according to the bottles, so Lux wasn’t too far off. He noticed the two of them as they approached and stood up.

“Heyy… What’s up guys. This place is fucking great right? Beer is super fuck… fucking cheap. I’m loving this.”

As if Ezreal wasn’t enough to deal with, now Jinx had to deal with drunk Ezreal. How fun. Lux looked rather disappointed, and Jinx had to resist the urge to lean down and say, ‘Sure he isn’t as bad as I say?’ Lux put a hand on his shoulder and spoke slowly.

“Hey Ez, are you doing okay buddy?”

“Ooh fuck yeah Lux I’m doing awesome. Hey, has anyone ever told you how pretty you are? Cause like… yeah… you’re really pretty.

Jinx started to bite her lip as he spoke. Nothing made her quite has angry and anxious as this fucker did. Ezreal would hold the accolade of “Makes Jinx bite her lip” along with withdrawal, hot girls, and explosions. It really wasn’t a great award to have honestly.

“O-Oh, thank you. You seem a bit drunk buddy, do you need us to take you home?”

Ezreal looked at her for a few seconds and then got a big dumb smile on his face.

“If you guys take me home, can I bring you to my room Lux? Maybe we could… hang out for a while, y’know?”

…

“She’s not going to fuck you, idiot.”

Ezreal and Lux both looked at Jinx as the words left her mouth. Ezreal looked more confused than anything, which honestly made a lot of sense considering what a lightweight he seemed to be. Lux, however, did not seem confused.

“Can you not be rude to someone for more than 5 minutes?! Are you kidding me?!”

Jinx was practically aghast at Lux. After a moment she raised her voice as well.

“What? You’re fucking angry at me? After what Ezreal just said to you, you’re mad at me.”

“He’s drunk Jinx, he obviously isn’t thinking right. Did you just forget what we just talked about?”

Jinx rolled her eyes and took a few steps away before turning back.

“Oh, this is fucking rich blondie. I have literally told you so many times, Ezreal is into you and is weird. And now, when he’s fucking proving me right, you just decide, ‘No I think I’ll get mad at the girl who just defended me from a drunk guy who just tried to invite me to have sex with him.’”

Lux took a step towards her and threw her hands up for emphasis.

“Do you think this is the first guy who’s tried to hit on me, Jinx? He’s practically harmless, and he’s a good friend to me! Just because he said something dumb while he was drunk, does not justify your hatred for him, which I don’t understand because he’s not as bad as you make him out to be. Is he a bit much? Yes. Does he sometimes act annoying? Yes. But that doesn’t make him a weirdo.”

Jinx held her ground as Lux drew closer still, until their faces were just a few inches apart. She examined every inch of Lux’s face, feeling a mix of angry and embarrassed warmth in her cheeks. But fuck this, she wasn’t about to look like an idiot.

“Fuck. You’re even more naïve than I thought, rich girl.”

Lux looked like she had something else she wanted to spout, but after a few moments crossed her arms over her chest.

“You’re taking me home. Now.”

Without another word Lux walked off towards the exit, throwing the wooden door open without a second of hesitation. Jinx rolled her eyes and looked at Ezreal, who seemed to have sobered up a bit due to the fight.

“Come on.” Jinx said. “Unless you want to walk home, you gotta come with me.”

Not waiting for him, Jinx followed after Lux.

--

The drive to Ezreal’s place was the worst of it if Jinx was being honest. Not a single person said a word the entire way, just a drive through Zaun at night in total silence. When they finally pulled up to his apartment, Ezreal mumbled some kind of awkward apology, to which Lux assured him it was okay. After that he stumbled out of her truck and into the building. The moment the door closed behind Ezreal; Jinx spoke.

“I can’t believe you let him treat you like that. I don’t care if he was drunk or not, that isn’t an excuse to talk to you like that.”

Lux sighed and let her head fall back. Interestingly enough, she didn’t scoot over to fill the spot Ezreal had left, and still sat in the middle of the bench.

“Can you stop acting like he just assaulted me?”

“Fuck that, stop making excuses for him. He said that shit, he should have consequences. It infuriates me that you just let him be a creep to you.”

Lux laughed.

“That is rich coming from you, Jinx.”

…

“And what the fuck is that supposed to mean?”

Lux turned to look her in the eye before she spoke.

“You don’t see the irony here? How you keep calling Ezreal a creep for saying that stuff, when all you’ve done since we met has been flirt with me. ‘You like seeing me in a collar?’ ‘I like my women how I like my coffee.’ ‘So, I drive you crazy? Thought I already told you prissy girls weren’t my type.’ You’re really going to look at me and say Ezreal is a creep when you talk to me like that? Maybe you’re the creep here.”

Jinx stared at Lux for a few seconds after that before turning away. Without saying another word, she pulled out from Ezreal’s apartment and started driving back to the campus dorms. Lux didn’t say anything for the drive there, and neither did Jinx. When they finally pulled into the parking lot, Jinx parked the truck, unlocked the doors, and waited.

Lux didn’t get out of the truck though. Just kept sitting there, which was really infuriating for Jinx because the sooner Lux was gone, the sooner she could cry. Jinx refused to even glance at Lux, until she finally spoke.

“I-I’m sorry. I didn’t think about it before I said it. I didn’t mean to say you were like that. You’re not… I… I know some people say that girls like you are all just guys wearing dresses so they can prey on girls. That’s not what I meant, I’m… I’m really sorry Jinx.”

Jinx finally turned her head to Lux and nodded.

“Thanks. I mean, you’re right. I’m creepy. I’m a creepy person, just look at my eyes, look at my skin. I’m a walking fucking corpse man. But… thanks for saying that. I know that’s not what you meant, but it still… you know.”

“Yeah.”

It was silent again after that, neither of them knowing what to say. Jinx wished she knew better words for this, to explain what she wanted without ranting. Before she could find those words though, Lux spoke.

“Hey,” do you think you can walk me to my room? I don’t like walking alone, at night.”

Jinx nodded right away and pulled the keys from her ignition.

“Of course. I totally get it. I’m still kind of pissed at you about what happened, but I’d never make you go alone.”

Lux nodded and opened up the door.

“Thanks, Jinx.”

--

Lux opened up the door to her dorm and stepped inside, turning to Jinx as she entered.

“Thanks for walking me back but… I still have things I want to say. I don’t want to fight but I need to get it off my chest.”

Jinx followed after her and swung the door shut.

“Long as I get to do the same. I have a lot of shit I need to say to you.”

Lux shook her head before pacing back and forth across the carpet for a few moments, hands moving between fidgeting with her sweater, to her hair, before she finally faced Jinx.

“There is literally no way for me to do this without screaming at you, so I’m sorry if I say something stupid and hurt your feelings.”

Still being considerate. She was still Lux, even when exhausted.

“Fire away.” Jinx said, leaning against the door.

“I wish for once you would just think before you did something!” Wow ok no prep time at all. “Tonight, if you had just kept your mouth shut to Ezreal, we could have dropped him off, gone back, and had a normal relaxing friendly night. At the diner, you talked bad about me behind my back to Ekko so he wouldn’t be mad, without thinking at all that I might’ve been nearby! And it’s not a big fucking diner!”

Lux got closer and ran both hands through her own hair.

“You say things on impulse, you do drugs because you feel like it, you have weekend long binges in response to one girl being mad at you, you’re so fucking impulsive! Do you ever think that could get you hurt? Do you ever think it could hurt others? Your problem, Jinx, is that you don’t give a shit what anyone else thinks but you, and so you act how you want to act, and not how you should act. And it drives me insane! Every time I think we’re this close to being friends, you either do something stupid that makes me angry, or you close your self-off! Speaking of which, I shared some things about myself that were a little personal tonight. And when I asked you about a few things, you just brushed me off as if it didn’t matter. Maybe I want to get closer to you Jinx! But you never think about that because you never think in the first place! You just assume and live on instinct!”

She took a second to breathe and started again before Jinx could even respond.

“And that infuriates me even more! I don’t understand you. I’ve only known you for two weeks and no one has ever made me this conflicted! You’re so… contradictory! People say you’re creepy, and you’re worthless, and you’re a slut, and you dress like you want to prove them right. You don’t give a shit that they say those things about you, it’s not hard to see at all. You’re you, you’re… Jinx, and whoever doesn’t like Jinx can go “fuck off” as you would put it. And that part of you is amazing, and it’s so aggravating at the same time. You think everyone is the person talking about you, and you talk to them the same way too. You don’t know me, and you were so rude, and awful, and cruel to me, and at the same time you’ve also shown me so much compassion and kindness and I hate it! Why does it even make me upset? Why do you make me feel so confused? I hate you, and you hate me, so why do I care so much? And you only make it worse because I care, and you don’t!”

Lux came to a stop, her heavy breaths the only sound in the room as her face went from red back to its usual tint. Lux made one final sigh before looking back at Jinx. Thing was it was honestly too much to fucking process all at once. She was still unpacking the first half, but Lux was expecting a response. Welp, fuck it.

“Fine. You’re right. I’m impulsive. I like to live how I want to live, flashlight. It’s better than the alternative. Which begs the question, do you know what your problem is Lux?”

Lux gestured for Jinx to continue. She pushed herself off the door and started to slowly take steps forward as she spoke.

“Your problem is that you refuse to take any risks at all. Every time you’re presented with a roadblock you take the safest possible outcome, because little miss perfect can’t be anything less. Perfect grades, perfect hair, perfect fucking life. Except you aren’t fucking perfect. But you don’t want to admit that, and fuck knows why that is. Tonight, Ezreal said things that weren’t cool. I know it offended you, and it fucking should offend you! But you just acted like it didn’t bother you, because calling Ezreal on his fake frat boy bullshit is too much of a risk. It’s better to let his simping ass think he has a chance and follow you around, instead of being honest with him and telling him that he’s got no shot. No wonder you’re a fucking politicians daughter Lux because that’s exactly how you act! I still don’t know why you wanted to go to this concert, because when Ekko originally asked, you said some bullshit about not being a party girl.”

She stopped slouching and put herself up to her proper 5 foot 6 inches of height, so she could look down at Lux now that they were practically face to face.

“You’re right, there are these moments where you and I could become close. And even though I can’t fucking stand your optimistic bull shit ivy league attitude, I actually fucking like you Lux. Behind all the bullshit there’s a real person, and I want to know her. But you have to keep being perfect, you can’t not be perfect, or else, I don’t know, daddy stops sending money or mommy cuts you off from the inheritance or some other rich person bullshit. I wouldn’t know, I’m a fucking street urchin who got adopted by a drug dealer. You act like I’m such a mystery, as if I had any chance of understanding you. You have the opportunity for freedom Lux, you have money, you have position, you have privilege, but instead of acting on that freedom to enjoy life, you spend it being the perfect blonde rich politician’s daughter, obsessed with your weird control fetish to stop yourself from having fun.”

She finished with a sigh, the last few words forcing her to take a long and deep inhale. Lux was looking right at her, apparently unafraid despite Jinx’s height advantage. At first, she waited for Lux to speak, but when she didn’t, Jinx took the initiative.

“I bet you that no matter what I offered you, you would never do something crazy Lux. I know for a fact that beyond going to a party you could never break your own rules.”

“Oh yeah?” Lux said, apparently deciding she’d endured enough.

“Yeah, that’s right, and I don’t even have to prove myself right because-”

Without a word, Lux threw her hands around Jinx’s head and connected their lips.

Jinx totally froze in place, full stop, brain reboot, as the only thing that she was able to register was the feeling of Lux’s soft lips pressed against hers, and those hands suddenly threaded through her hair. Jinx forgot what they were talking about and let her own hands drift to Lux’s hips.

She closed her eyes and kissed back, relishing in the little sound of surprise that came from Lux’s throat. Her body was on fire, her heart pounding in her chest like nothing she’d ever felt. Before she could react any further, Lux pulled away. She looked at Jinx with wide eyes, her lips swollen from the kiss.

“There.” Lux breathed out, barely forming words. “I proved you wrong.”

In an instant Lux’s back was up against the wall as Jinx pinned her in place and brought their lips together again. Lux didn’t fight, just moaned, and whimpered as Jinx moved her wherever she wanted with complete ease. Jinx let her tongue start to probe and poke at Lux’s lips, and after a moment Lux relented, and their tongues were swirling around each other. She tasted like some kind of sweet ChapStick, and something else. Can someone taste like sunlight? That’s what it was essentially, almost like a strong citrus that warmed the soul and set her on fire. She needed Lux, needed more, needed her tongue, needed her body, needed her lips.

Against her own will, Jinx pulled away from the second kiss, leaving them both panting against the wall. Lux’s eyes flickered open, a hazy look on each as she scanned Jinx’s face. Jinx let her grin that Lux hated so much sneak onto her face, and she spoke.

“Well well.” Jinx growled, enjoying the whimper that escaped Lux’s throat from the sound. “Who would’ve thought? Prissy and perfect little Luxanna Crownguard. I’m almost impressed you did that; I really didn’t think you had it in you.”

Lux looked practically stunned, like her big blue eyes twitching back and forth as she no doubt examined every detail of Jinx. Jinx was really glad she had chosen this top, as it didn’t elude her that Lux’s eyes flicked downwards a few times, to where her nipple piercings were clearly outlined in the black fabric.

“What’s a matter? Cat got your tongue?” Jinx said.

“D-Don’t act like that was anything. You said I wouldn’t do something crazy, and I proved you wrong. That’s it.” Lux’s voice was frantic and uneven, and it was driving Jinx mad.

Jinx chuckled and leaned close, listening to Lux’s breathing speed up as her eyes completely betrayed her apparent and sudden disinterest.

“Ohhh is that it? Well then, I supposed you wouldn’t like it if I were to…” She leaned in close suddenly, pushing into the crook of Lux’s neck, eyeing Lux’s neck up and down and imagining what it would look like covered in bite marks and bruises. “Have a little taste?”

This close she could hear Lux swallow and take a few shaky inhales, before she spoke.

“Of course, I wouldn’t like that…”

It was a challenge, a silent one but a challenge, nonetheless. Jinx moved up just a bit, gently brushing her lips against the shell of Lux’s ear.

“Mmm… We’ll see blondie. All that shit aside, I need to hear you say you want it. Tell me no, and I’ll stop, and we can forget this ever happened. Tell me yes… well, I think you know what yes means don’t you Lux.”

Lux nodded slowly, her breathing still uneven and her form shaking under Jinx. Poor thing, she couldn’t wait to ruin her even more. Without needing a second prompting, Lux whispered to Jinx.

“Yes.”

Jinx grinned. Time to show Lux everything she’d been missing.

Chapter Text

-Lux-

--

BEEEEP… BEEP BEEP BEEP… BEEEEEP… BEEP BEEP BEEP… BEEEEP

Lux’s eyes fluttered open to the sound of a rhythmic and piercing noise she’d used for years. Ever since she really began to take her education into her own hands, this was the sound that had woken her up. And so, when someone gets used to something for so long, regardless of how awful, loud, and annoying it might be, they’re often able to ignore it. Built into her own circadian rhythm and schedule, Lux knew it was a Saturday.

Which meant she could sleep in. And despite appearances, Lux really liked to sleep in.

The long tone followed by 3 quick stabs started to fade out of her mind, and her eyes slowly closed again, her body enveloped by warmth.

“Can you fucking turn that off already?” Jinx mumbled beside her, her voice groggy with the morning.

“Y-Yeah… sure.”

Lux forced herself to sit up a bit as her hand fumbled off the side of the bed. Finally her palm felt the cool plastic of her phone, and she shut it off.

“Thanks.” Jinx yawned.

“No problem.”

Lux laid back into the bed and snuggled up, feeling an arm wrap around her. She smiled at the contact and nuzzled into the mass of warmth behind her, her deep breaths evening out as she drifted back asleep.

…

Until she realized just what had happened.

Lux’s eyes shot open and her head twisted back to look behind her.

Jinx was there, eyes closed and peaceful despite the sudden disturbance of her alarm.

Jinx was there.

In her bed.

Jinx was in her bed.

Naked.

And so was she.

…

“JINX!?”

Lux bolted upwards and drew the covers up to hide herself as she turned towards the girl. Jinx’s brow furrowed and her eyes flicked open, and a moment later she groaned a sound of disapproval.

“What is it, flashlight?”

“What do you mean what is it!? Why are you in my bed!? Why are you naked!? Why am I naked!?”

Her partner groaned again and sat up (not bothering to cover her nudity as Lux had) one hand rubbing at her deep pink eyes.

“What do you mean? You should know why I’m here dude. Did I really fuck you so hard that you forgot about last night? I'm honestly impressed with myself. When I said I was gonna blow your mind I didn’t mean literally.”

Last night…

All at once it came back to her, and Lux remembered their previous evening. Including the worrying amount of time they had spent in this bed. Oh gods… Oh please no.

She had slept with Jinx.

“Wha… I… I can’t… W-What the hell?” Lux stammered out, her breathing getting quick as her chest started to feel tight and her stomach started to swirl.

“My guy, why are you freaking out? All we did was fuck, and I remember pretty specifically that you gave me consent.”

“That’s clearly not the issue here! Jinx we had sex. We had SEX! That was my first time, and I gave it away just like that! H-How… Why would I… I-I don’t understand…”

Jinx rolled her eyes and adjusted in her place, a hand pushing the mass of loose hair that flowed all around her out of her line of sight. Lux had barely even registered that it wasn’t braided.

“Why is that a big deal? We fucked, you liked it, I liked it, whatever gods exist probably liked it. There’s no reason to get upset.”

“It was my virginity Jinx! That’s supposed to be something special, that you give to someone you’re going to spend your whole life with, not give it to a girl you’ve known for just under three weeks! Why would I even have sex with you in the first place? We hate each other, whatever relationship we have is all based on the fact that we’re forced to do this project together.”

“So we hate fucked then. It’s not that weird to do. Sometimes when you can’t stand someone, having sex with them is a way to get that animosity out. And virginity isn’t even real dingus, it’s an imaginary concept made by people that want to shame women for losing it, and shame men for having it. It serves no other purpose.”

“But I wanted it to be special! I’m not like that, I’ve never been like that. I’m not going to sleep around or have sex with the people I hate, that doesn’t make sense! I had my first time and… It was with someone like you!”

That one seemed to register with Jinx, as it stopped her in her tracks. It took Lux a second, but she realized just what had come out of her mouth.

“Jinx I-”

“I didn’t realize having sex with me was so awful. Fine, I’ll get out of your hair since being close to ‘someone like me’ is too much for perfect pretty Lux.”

She got out of the bed and walked towards her bag, throwing her clothes on as fast as she could. Lux didn’t know what to say, all she could do was watch as the whirlwind of emotions inside her fought.

Part of her wanted to ask Jinx to come back, to say sorry for what she said, pull her back into the bed and get into the position from earlier. Jinx’s arm wrapped around her, nuzzled together under the covers. That wasn’t what she meant, she had liked it, she wanted Jinx to stay and hold her and give her more.

The other part of her was furious. Furious at Jinx for having sex with her and not understanding why she was upset, and furious at herself for having sex with Jinx. There was a good deal of shame mixed with that one as well. For years she’d been raised in the Illuminators, she knew all of the sins of the flesh and the mind, and she’d committed several that evening. She gave her first, unmarried. To a woman. And… a woman like Jinx.

Needless to say, she couldn’t find the words.

And Jinx didn’t seem keen on waiting for them.

Once she was fully dressed, she pushed as much of her hair into a bun as she could, threw her backpack on, and looked back at Lux.

“We can meet back up after class on Monday. Still have to do this fucking project together. Sorry if you can’t bear to be near someone like me.” Jinx spat with vitriol, before throwing the door open and slamming it behind her.

And with that, Lux was left alone with her thoughts, spinning and swirling in her mind and her stomach. The rest of the day was a blur. Both due to confusion, and the tears in her eyes.

--

By Monday, Lux had properly gotten a hold on her emotions. She’d spent Sunday pressing over the details of their encounter, both the night of and the morning after, and she’d come to a conclusion on what she’d done wrong, and what Jinx had done wrong. All she needed to do was confront the girl now.

Lux was early to class, as always, but Jinx was not. In fact she trudged in just about 40 minutes late, looking like death. She had that big canvas colored hoodie Lux had become fond of, as well as a pair of high waisted short shorts. The hoodie fell down just enough to almost look like she didn’t have any pants on from certain angles, which Lux guessed was not unintentional.

Lux realized as Jinx plopped down on the seat next to her, she’d never really gotten a look at Jinx’s legs before, as they were always hidden behind the black fabric of her jeans. They were long, thin and shapely in all the right ways, leading perfectly down to those chunky combat boots Jinx loved so much. They looked nice… better than nice even. Lux was finding it very difficult to pay attention to the lecture, though she had no inclination why that would be.

Jinx also seemed to not be paying attention, although for a much different ailment. She looked downright ghoulish, her pale skin somehow seeming more like a dead body, her eyes hung low and the dark circles that permeated them seeming heavier than normal.

Lux immediately felt guilt wash over her, because she recognized this look. It was the same one Jinx wore after their fight over the diner. Which meant Jinx was just coming off of a binge of some kind, and it was Lux’s fault.

Her hair was braided again, as usual. The fact that it wasn’t the morning they woke up together felt like some kind of forbidden secret. Something only she had been allowed to know and see. It made her feel a bit warm for some stupid reason.

She found she had to center herself halfway through and remember that all of it had been figured out. All she needed to do was talk to Jinx. All the weird feelings and moments of comfort and attraction would be laid to rest, and they could exist as mutual team members who occasionally enjoyed a meal or hung out together, and never anything more.

The lecture ended, and Lux turned her attention to Jinx. Jinx didn’t seem pleased with this, but matched nonetheless.

“So,” Lux began, “I have a similar schedule to last Monday. Could you please show up at my dorm around 4?”

“I can’t drive today.”

“Good, then once you're here we can- wait what?”

“I said I can’t drive. I did something stupid and my sister didn’t want me to drive. She dropped me off, and I’m taking the bus home since she had to work tonight.”

Lux had to take a few moments to register what was being said to her before thinking of a response.

“Can’t you just take the bus back here again to meet with me?”

Jinx shrugged.

“I guess. Kind of inconvenient but whatever.”

This girl…

Lux took in a deep breath in and out, before fishing something from her pockets, and putting her hand out to Jinx. The girl looked at her confused before reaching her hand out as well, and Lux dropped her keys into Jinx’s hands.

“This is the key to my room. If you don’t have any class after this one just go there and wait for me. We need to talk about last weekend.”

Jinx looked at her for a few seconds before letting her head plonk down onto the desk.

“Fine.”

Lux gathered up her things and stood up, giving Jinx one more look before going to her class.

--

When she finally returned to her room, to no surprise she found Jinx inside. She was sitting at Lux’s computer chair, some kind of gaming device in her hands, and a can of that “Chem-Power” energy drink sitting on Lux’s desk coaster (thank the gods she wasn’t the kind of monster who didn’t use those).

She looked up as Lux walked in, and made a grunt of acknowledgement. Lux returned it with a wave as she sat her bag down and sat at her bed. Jinx sighed loudly enough to show she wasn’t pleased, before pausing whatever game she was playing and wheeling the chair to face Lux.

They faced each other for a long moment, neither sure exactly what the first words should be. Jinx seemed to have an idea, but Lux cut her off.

“First rule, we are not going to have a repeat of what happened Friday ever again. We’re going to talk about what happened now, and then never again. Ok?”

Jinx gave her a confused face and opened her mouth, but Lux continued.

“Rule two, for all of our future time spent together, you are going to stop flirting with me. We’re both going to treat each other with respect, listen to the other, and we aren’t going to have ceaseless fights again.”

Jinx didn’t say anything this time, just listened and gave a nod that she was still present.

“Third… this isn’t a rule. I’m sorry Jinx. Saturday I… I didn’t handle what happened well. I didn’t mean anything hurtful, and I wasn’t trying to imply anything about you. I just… it’s really new for me, everything about you, and I realize that this might not have been a big deal for you. But it was for me, and instead of trying to be rational I freaked out and said something that sounded really awful. I’m sorry. I didn’t mean it in the way it came out.”

There was a long moment of silence as Jinx stared at her, pink eyes flicking back and forth across her face. She swallowed hard and nodded.

“Uh… yeah. Thanks. I’m sorry I… did it, I guess.”

“Don’t be. Like you said, I gave consent. I want… at the time I thought I wanted it, you were completely in your rights. But I will ask that you apologize for treating my obvious concern like it was not important the morning after. Even if virginity isn’t important to you, it is… was important to me.”

“Right. Yeah. Sorry. That wasn’t cool of me. I was just trying to tell you that it was okay. You didn’t do anything wrong, yknow? But I fucked it up like usual.”

Lux chewed at her lip for a moment, trying to stop herself saying that what they did was in fact wrong. She decided not to, and shook her head instead.

“You didn’t mess anything up Jinx. I’m the one who said something rude. Thank you for apologizing.” She reached out her hand to shake Jinx’s and gave her a smile. “What do you say we forget about that, and start back at friends? We can do this project, maybe we can spend some time together here and there, and that’s all that needs to happen. Sounds like a deal?”

Jinx stared at her for a moment with a look Lux didn’t quite understand. But nonetheless she took Lux’s hand.

“Sure. If that’s what you want I guess. Rules accepted.”

That wasn’t entirely the response she wanted, but the rules were set in place now. They would stay like this, and nothing more would happen.

“Great. Why don’t we get started then, I had some ideas about how we could maybe change the design to be more acclimating for shipping trucks and other commercial use.”

She stood up from her bed to grab her laptop, and their schoolwork continued.

--

About a few hours had passed now, and the two of them had fallen back into routine. Well, that wasn’t exactly true. They worked on the project, Jinx made her laugh, she made Jinx laugh, but it was different. The entire time they worked Jinx seemed somewhat distant, her jokes were far less energetic and enthusiastic as usual. And per their agreements, Jinx did not once imply anything sexual between them. No flirting whatsoever.

Why did that make Lux feel a bit sad? It wasn’t that she enjoyed it when Jinx flirted with her, in fact quite the opposite. It was frustrating beyond belief… and yet…

That wasn’t something she wanted to unpack right now. Instead they worked and worked, making significant progress during that time. Right around 9:30 Lux was putting the finishing touches on a new section of the bridge while Jinx stood looming beside her.

“And you think the stress is fine? It’s not too much to handle?” She asked.

“Yeah, it’s fine. Should be no issues.”

“Good.”

She went back to type away, and gave the program a quick save. That was when it first hit her.

A sudden and overwhelming feeling washed over her, as if she was being watched. The moment it hit, she turned her head up to her right. Jinx was staring right at her. Those gorgeous eyes swimming with depth and beauty dissecting Lux piece by piece. Gods she was pretty.

“Jinx…” Lux planned to continue the sentence, but froze when Jinx’s fingers gently brushed against her chin. She wasn’t able to squeak out another word, as those calloused, lithe digits sent lighting down her spine.

Jinx kissed her.

Lux made some kind of muffled sound of surprise before the feeling of Jinx’s tongue prodding at her lips made every thought melt away from her mind. Her eyes filled with a needy haze, and fluttered shut.

Lux kissed back.

In a moment Jinx’s arms were wrapped around her and she was scooped up, wrapping her own legs around to mimic the position they had shared before. Jinx dropped her down onto the bed and climbed on top, almost everything the same as their first. Every nerve in her body was alight with desire, and as she looked up at Jinx she gave the girl a nod.

Jinx leaned down and reconnected the kiss, before trailing down her face and to her neck. Lux leaned her head to give Jinx as much room as she could, as hand started to explore her body, and she gave in to her wants.

--

BEEEEP… BEEP BEEP BEEP… BEEEEEP… BEEP BEEP BEEP… BEEEEP

Lux’s hand reached out to turn her alarm off. Tuesday morning, class in an hour and a half, first thing on the agenda was a shower. She pulled herself out of bed and trudged to her shower, turning it on as she reached down to take her clothes off.

Oh, she was already naked. That made things nice and easy.

Once the water was good and hot, she stepped in and let the morning heat wash over her. For a change she was nice and relaxed this morning, and the shower felt heavenly for some odd reason.

As she dried herself off and walked back into her room, everything clicked.

Jinx was in her bed.

Naked.

Lux smacked herself on the forehead with her palm.

“Fuuuuck me.”

--

The two of them sat identical to how it was the previous day. Lux on her bed, and Jinx on Lux’s computer chair.

This time, both of them somehow had gathered exactly how this was going to go.

“Ok,” Lux said, keeping her hands as still as she could. “So our last set of rules didn’t work.”

“That’s one way to put it.” Jinx said, arm over the chair and a look of general smugness inhabiting her face.

Lux… wasn’t as upset as she expected herself to be.

“So we need to set up a new system, obviously.”

“Uh huh.”

Lux took a deep breath in as the memories of the previous night flooded her. She couldn’t believe she was about to do this.

“First rule, whenever we do this, we need to make sure it’s not on a day I have to wake up early.”

“Deal.”

“Rule two, you are to tell NOBODY of this.”

“Oh trust me, this is between you and me now. Our little secret, Luxie.”

Gods dammit.

“And third. This isn’t a rule, I’m just… what the fuck am I doing?” Lux let her head fall into her hands as embarrassment filled her to the core. She was negotiating a sexual relationship. With a girl! And it wasn’t at all romantic! It was barely even platonic!

“‘What you’re doing’ is something that feels good, blondie. I repeat my sentiment from before, you aren’t doing anything wrong. What’s so bad about us hate fucking now and then? Friends with benefits is a really popular thing nowadays.”

Oh gods. Friends with benefits. What was she doing?!

“I… I just don’t even understand why Jinx. I don’t even like girls. I’m not like that.”

Jinx stared at her for a moment before getting up off the chair, plodding over, and sitting next to Lux.

“I’m gonna be real with you, flashlight. That just isn’t true.”

Lux looked up from her hands, the blood in her body seeming to drain cold.

“What?”

Jinx rolled her eyes before wrapping one arm around to gently hold Lux by the waist.

“You say you aren’t into girls. Last night, and Friday night. What did we do?”

“Have sex…”

“Right, and you have sex with people you are attracted to in some way. I’ve expressed that I think you’re really fucking hot. And you, maybe in some kinda weird blondie way, are into me. Right?”

Lux let the silence sit for a real long moment.

“But I’m straight.”

Jinx sighed and rested her head onto her free hand.

“Ok. Let's take this from another angle. Picture in your head the most attractive girl in the world. Or even, the prettiest girl you personally know. And not that it would be me, but imagine someone other than me.”

Lux had to take a second to picture someone other than Jinx, since that apparently wasn’t allowed. Her mind settled on Seraphine. She was really pretty, in a lot of ways. And, even though she was an awful person, Marcie popped up as well.

“Now, imagine the girl you’re picturing doing the things that I did to you.”

‘Seraphine pushed Lux against the wall, trailing kisses down her neck that had more teeth than she had any right to share. At the same time Marcie began to do the same at her thighs, grinning and growling like an animal.’

Lux’s body immediately started to feel hot, and a mix of confusion and need spread inside.

“Do you like what you’re thinking about?”

Lux nodded slowly, suddenly adding Jinx into the picture as well.

“Ok, good. Now picture the most handsome or attractive man on the planet, or the guy you’ve ever been most into.”

Hmm… probably Sylas. She’d only met him once but he was traditionally very attractive. He had been her one and only crush, as he had most of the aspects one would desire in a partner. Ekko and Ezreal were also, objectively, attractive guys.

“Now picture him doing the same things to you.”

Lux frowned. She did what Jinx asked but found herself only uncomfortable at the end.

“Did you like that?”

Lux shook her head.

“Lux, you’re a lesbian.”

All images and fantasies left her immediately, and she turned towards Jinx a bit too fast.

“What? How does that make me a l-l… a lesbian?!”

“You imagined a pretty girl having sex with you. You liked it. You imagine a hot guy having sex with you. You didn’t like it. You’ve had sex with me, a girl, twice in 3 days. Is this still not fuckin clicking dude?”

…

…

…

“Oh my gods I’m a lesbian.”

--

Wednesday came, and Lux was in a very different situation than she was used to. Jinx’s sister, apparently, still was not comfortable with Jinx driving (no doubt thanks to her most recent binge, which only added more guilt onto Lux’s pile) and logistically it wouldn’t work out that Jinx could come to her room.

So for the first time since they had met, Lux was on the bus headed down to Zaun to go to Jinx’s house.

Apparently Jinx’s sister was busy with her girlfriend tonight, and it would be fine for Lux to come over for a bit while they worked on their project. Admittedly with the amount of hours they had spent on it, it was pretty much done, but it could still use a few tweaks. And with their new… situation in place, there was suddenly a new incentive to spend time with Jinx.

Luxanna Crownguard was a lesbian.

And she was in a casual sexual relationship with a woman. A transgender woman. Whom she found somewhat impossible to be around, to the point of hate. Was it even hate anymore? What defines hate? Jinx called it hate sex, so she supposed it was but…

Gods…

Her life had been completely thrown around in just a few short weeks of this semester. If you had asked her days before the semester started, she would've said you were an idiot for suggesting this would happen.

Yet here she was.

And despite it all, things in her life had suddenly made so much sense. Her lack of attraction to any boys at all, her sometimes stray thoughts when she was alone about pretty girls at school. The way thinking about having kids with a man made her want to vomit. Suddenly things were clicking. It was new, it was interesting, it was confusing… but…

Most of all it just felt good.

Minus the realization of what being a lesbian meant. When she thought about her parents, and Garen, and her life at home… How in the world was she supposed to make that work? Her parents were vehemently not ok with gay people, and Garen…

Well she wasn’t sure where Garen stood. They had never talked about it before but he usually was on the opposite side of Mom and Dad every chance he could be. That is, when it didn’t jeopardize his inheritance and position within Demacian business and government. Not that she could blame him.

Still it was just a lot to think about, and there was no good answer for approaching any of it. Regardless of that, it wasn’t like she had to tell her family right now. She needed to focus on her education, getting her degree, and getting what she wanted out of her life.

The bus came to a screeching stop about two blocks away from Jinx’s house, and with a smile and a thank you to the driver, she got out. Jinx’s instructions, while hectic, were pretty clear, and she was able to follow the streets and cobbled side walks to find Jinx’s house.

It was… not exactly big. Well, that is to say it had a garage, and it had a second floor, which according to Jinx made it very desirable. But compared to what she was used to, and compared to the houses on topside? Well… she shouldn’t judge.

As she made her way towards the front door, her eyes spotted a glint from the garage, and out of curiosity she walked over. There sitting inside was Jinx’s truck, in all its glory, as well as two fierce looking motorcycles that were parked nearby. They were slightly different in make, not that Lux knew anything about motorcycles, with the biggest difference being in color and designs.

One was a slick mix of gold and gray, its chrome parts shining with the care of a fanatic and a license plate that read “B4d4ss”. The other was obviously Jinx’s, black paint rife with Jinx’s graffiti designs that covered her leather jacket as well. At the front of the bike where the light sat, a big blue steel Shark head had been constructed, the light poking out from its jaws. Its license plate read “F1shb0n3s”.

Filling every surface of the garage were all sorts of tools, mechanical devices, benches and shelves and frames filled with things Lux could never begin to understand.

Before she could make another move, the door at the back of the garage opened, and Jinx walked out. She was wearing the white pentakill tank top again, as well as jeans and her boots.

“Oh, sup blondie. Didn’t think you’d be here already.”

The moment she stepped down the steps into the garage, a smell of something hit her. Despite it's strength, It was kind of hard to describe. It was incredibly earthy, like Jinx’s scent but even stronger, with a pungent hint of skunk spray hidden behind it.

“Ugh… What’s that smell Jinx?”

“Hmm? Oh, just my blunt. You want a hit?”

Jinx strolled towards her, hand outstretched with what looked like a cigarette in it. Though, it didn’t have that iconic orange end to it, it was just rolled paper. As she got closer as well, she noticed Jinx’s eyes were red and bloodshot, not like when she was on shimmer though. Oh… Right… This was weed. Lux felt stupid for not realizing sooner.

“No, that’s okay. What are you doing out here?”

“Oh just tuning my sister's boxing machine.” Jinx threw a thumb back to some kind of weird contraption in the corner. “She went a bit too rough with it apparently, so I'm fixing it up for her. You wanna grab a seat while I finish up? I don’t mind if you get an eyeful while I work, honestly that’s kind of hot.”

Lux rolled her eyes, but she couldn’t deny she wanted to very carefully inspect Jinx’s arms and fingers while she worked.

“Fine, just don’t take too long okay? We have work to do.”

“Yeah yeah I know, don’t get your panties in a twist. Or do. They're gonna end up on my floor anyway, so…”

“Ugh. You are the worst.”

“And you like it.”

Again, she could not deny this. Instead Lux did as instructed, and watched as Jinx walked over to a speaker she had set up, and started playing some music. Lux actually recognized it, and smiled when she realized it was the song Ekko had played to start the Firelight’s set at the concert.

Jinx was a marvel to look at when it came to machines. All the hints of laziness and lack of care seemed to disappear, as she did everything meticulously and with intent. Sometimes her methods seemed… a bit unorthodox, such as re-attaching a fixed Joint with duct tape before actually screwing it in, but it all seemed to work in the end. She really was a mechanic at heart, and Lux found herself smiling as she watched the strange girl she’d met a few weeks ago work.

Eventually Jinx seemed pleased with her work, and turned off the music. She gave Lux a glance, and the two of them walked into the house.

Lux wasn’t really sure what she was expecting, but her house was very unique. There was a full kitchen right near the garage which connected to a small living room, with a few couches and decently sized TV. It seemed that there was a bedroom and bathroom on this floor, but Jinx immediately went up the stairs, so they likely belonged to her sister. Unless someone shared a room, it didn’t seem like there was enough space for three people to live here, so it seemed the same as her Dad, Jinx’s mother wasn’t in the equation anymore either. If she ever was.

“Just so you know, my room isn’t as uh… organized as yours is, so sorry if it’s rough for you.”

“I’m sure it’ll be fine.”

Jinx opened up the door and walked inside, that weed smell just as strong in here as it was in the garage. Jinx’s room was… very interesting to say the least. It was smaller than Lux’s dorm room, a messy bed in the corner with a desk on the opposite side, a pretty heft looking PC tower tucked into its own space. There was a dresser in the room, as well as a bedside table and a little drawer as well. The walls were absolutely littered in things. Posters, paint, graffiti, art, road signs, flags, just about everywhere there could be something, there was. In one corner of the room there was a big glass tank, kind of filled with greenery and wildlife with a lamp sticking down into it. Huh, maybe Jinx had a pet?

Below was gray carpet, although it seemed pretty horribly stained in a ton of different places. There was a hamper sticking out of a closet which appeared filled far past its brimming point, implying that Jinx had perhaps stuffed everything she could in it in preparation for Lux. Well, at least she was being thoughtful. It certainly was unorganized, and maybe a bit gross with the smell, but overall it really was not too bad.

Jinx strolled in and took a place at her hefty computer chair and spread her arms out.

“Welcome to my domain, fair maiden.”

Lux walked in and looked around with a half smile.

“It’s nice.” She lied.

“Thanks. Here actually I’ll sit on my bed, you can have the chair. Or… I mean we could just both sit on my bed. If you want.”

Lux nodded, suddenly incredibly self conscious, and did so.

“Hey, what’s in that tank?”

Jinx’s eyes got wide and she stood up.

“Here come see.”

She pulled Lux up by her hand and practically dragged her over to the box on the counter.

“This isn’t a tank, it’s a Vivarium. And this big guy,” She pointed inside, where Lux finally realized blending in with the greenery of the tank was a long black and yellow snake, “is Kuro! He’s a Carpet Python.”

Lux took a few seconds to realize what she was looking at before she took a step back. She certainly wasn’t afraid of snakes or anything, but she’d never met anyone who actually had one as a pet. It was pretty big too.

Jinx noticed her sudden shyness and frowned.

“Hey, don’t be scared. He’s a big sweetheart, he’d never hurt a fly. I’ve had him for just around 3 years now. My sister bought him for me as a gift when I moved back in with her, and he’s been my good buddy ever since. Haven’t you Kurooo?” As she spoke she reached a hand down and gently patted the head of the snake, and to Lux’s surprise he seemed to lean into the touch.

“I’m kind of surprised you have a pet, Jinx. But he’s very pretty.”

Jinx grinned like a mad woman.

“Isn’t he? We were worried I wouldn’t be able to take care of him, because like y’know, it’s me, but I always make sure he’s got everything he needs. I read all kinds of guides online, I never smoke in my room because it’s bad for him, etc etc. And sis helps out too, when I… can’t do it. You know…”

Lux did know. That said, Jinx was kind of adorable around her snake. She seemed so genuinely loving and caring with him, it was hard to believe this was the same girl who lacked any form of responsibility before. Lux’s chest seemed to swell, and her heart skipped a beat at seeing this new side of Jinx.

The two of them sat back down as Jinx explained far more about Kuro than she probably needed to. It was really cute though.

Once Jinx finished, Lux took her laptop out of her bag and began to run over all the things she needed to do with Jinx.

Jinx, however, pressed a finger to her lips partway through.

“Hey, we're so far ahead on that damn project, could we maybe just hang out together for a change? We don’t even have to fuck, I’d just… I’d much rather talk or watch a movie or something than work like usual.”

Hmm… Lux took one look at her laptop, and then another at Jinx.

“Yeah. I think I’d rather do that too.”

Jinx grinned and gave a big thumbs up.

“Hell yeah. Rebel Lux, here she comes, breaking away from her cramped life and shiiit.”

Her mind drifted back to her family again. The conversation she’d had with Garen. The reason she went to that concert in the first place.

“You know what Jinx? This might sound stupid but… let me try ‘a hit’.”

Jinx’s eyes went wide for a second before a devilish grin ripped across her face.

“Fuck yeah Lux.”

--

Lux leaned her head back again as the warm feeling rushed through her head. They had to go downstairs to smoke because Kuro couldn’t be around smoke, but at some point they must’ve made their way back to Jinx’s room. She smiled and bumped her head against Jinx’s.

Lux wasn’t sure when she had ended up sitting in Jinx’s lap, but here she was. The lights were really funny, and everything kind of hazed just a bit. Jinx had promised she’d be okay, so she was okay. She giggled to herself at the thought, which caused Jinx to raise an eyebrow. Not enough to question it apparently. Gods Jinx was hot.

“Y’know.” Jinx began, “Sometimes I think I should just drop out of college and be a car mech.”

“Oh yeah.” Lux whispered, running a finger along Jinx’s collarbone.

“Yeah. I could open my own shop, do my favorite thing for a living, meet cute girls, and guys, fix their cars and look hot doing it. I can’t though. Vi spent a lot of money for me to go to college. I gotta graduate, for her.”

Lux didn’t know who Vi was but she didn’t care. Instead she pressed a kiss to Jinx’s shoulder. In fact, her shoulders were covered with these cute little freckles. Lux wanted to kiss every last one. Lux mumbled an acknowledgment to the next sentence she didn’t register, as her kisses started to trail closer to Jinx’s neck. She could feel Jinx shift underneath her, feel her start to get excited. Mmm…

The rest of the evening was a blurred mixed pleasure. Once they parted ways a few hours later, Lux made Jinx swear never to let her smoke weed again.

Despite how much she liked it.

Chapter Text

-Jinx-

--

-- The Previous Saturday --

The door slammed shut behind Jinx as she trudged into the house. First things first. Was Vi home?

“Red!!! You Here!?”

…

…

…

Thank fuck.

She sprinted up the stairs to her room and ripped open the drawer opposite her desk. Without slowing down a beat she grabbed the syringe tool and a vial of shimmer, loading it up. Moments before sanitizing, glint from the light hit her eye, and pulled her head towards Kuro.

Ugghh fuck he needed to be fed.

She tossed the syringe tool down onto the desk and ran back down the stairs. A horrible thought struck her mind the moment she went to the fridge. She had spent the night in Lux’s room, which meant she wasn’t home to remember to get bait out to thaw.

No… no no fuck no! If she had to wait 3 hours to thaw the bait she was gonna lose it. She needed to get high now, not 3 fucking hours from now. Fuck!

She threw open the door and let out a sigh of relief. Vi must’ve remembered today was feeding day and got one ready to thaw. Without waiting she pulled it out and spent 10 minute warming it up, before sprinting back up and dropping the bait into Kuro’s Vivarium. She watched just to make sure, and sure enough Kuro found the snack in moments and struck. No time to admire him though, she ran to the bathroom and washed her hands, then ran back to the room. Again she grabbed her tools and dropped onto the bed.

She had barely begun to disinfect when the doorbell rang.

“Fuck off!” She yelled, dropping her needle again to run down the stairs.

She threw the door open, grabbed a package from the delivery guy, and slammed the door shut before he could say anything. Back to her room, package thrown to the ground, disinfecting needle.

A few minutes later she was sitting on her bed, mentally forcing everything away and coaxing herself closer to the edge. Her shaking hand gripped the polypropylene chamber, purple liquid inside begging for her. She lined the needle up and forced herself to look away. For a few moments she actually expected another comical interruption. Some kind of sitcom-esq disturbance that would stop her again, and maybe she’d see it as a sign not to go through with this.

It never came.

Jinx forced herself to turn back to her arm and watch. The track marks on her left arm that she usually hid with makeup were visible now, another reminder that this was just who she was. She was a junkie. Anything that could give her an escape from the prison of her life. Drugs, pretty girls, adrenaline, whatever it took.

Fuck.

Fuck fuck fuck.

She bit her lip hard and tried her best to stop from crying. She was strong. She wasn’t powder. She wasn’t weak anymore.

With a final bite of her lip, Jinx pushed the needle in.

The worst part of shooting up was the pain that came right away. Injecting a foreign substance directly into a human vein would, understandably, hurt. And beyond that, it should hurt. Your body is trying to tell you “Fuckface! This is a bad fucking idea! Stop it!” but Jinx was never really good at listening to those kinds of warnings.

She remembered the first time this shit had been forced into her. How hard Dad had tried to keep her off it. The sick grin on that insane doctor bastard's face.

She shook the thoughts away. This wasn’t about him anymore. She’d made the choice to keep doing it. Fuck him and fuck that situation. This was her now. She was Jinx, she wasn’t some weak little sump rat. She could take it now.

She forced her eyes to stay on it, despite how hard it made her want to vomit. She could already see the pinkish purplish hue to spread up and down, moving with her bloodstream. When she first started she had always needed to tie off to find a vein. At this point, it was just second nature. It wasn’t even like anything had changed, she just… she just knew. It was fucked up but at least it made things easy.

Finally every last drop was gone, and shaky hands extracted the device. She tossed it away, just trying to get as far away from the needle as she could, and threw herself down onto the bed pulling up her blankets. Mister Bunny came next, her arms wrapping around the old comforting fabric as they shook. Her whole body was full of tremors now. Whatever gods watched her must’ve decided she deserved a break though, no voices tonight. Instead her head was just full of Lux.

They’d had sex. They’d finally had sex. She’d wanted that since they met. It didn’t matter that Lux wasn’t happy, now she knew what it was like and that’s all there had to be. It’s not like she wanted anything more than sex. Who gave a shit at the end of the day?

This wasn’t the first time Jinx had dragged people down to her level. Jinx was good at that, watching people crash with her, see their beautiful lives fall apart. A part of her liked seeing it, liked knowing she wasn’t the only person in the world who was broken. So who gave a shit if Lux didn’t want her anymore? Who gave a shit if any chance of them being close had shattered? Who gave a shit about Lux?
…

Jinx did.

Before any other thoughts could register in her head, a warm rush filled her eyes. That drowning, sinking sensation when the world started to fall apart and turn into a haze of pink blurs. It stopped you from thinking at all, every beat of your heart became something you could practically fucking taste. Literally, you could even feel that throbbing in the roof of your mouth.

She brought her right hand up to brush her fingers against her temple, where the shimmer was always the strongest, where the veins were most affected. The pulsing in her fingers echoed with the pulsing on the soft sides of her head, right next to the eyes, and in turn it mixed in with the pumping in her feet, behind her knees, in her wrists, in her neck.

Every single pump of her heart was a new wave of warm pleasure and relaxation. She tried to say something. She didn’t know why, no one was around. Maybe she was trying to say it to Lux.

She fell off the bed a few moments later, although Jinx didn’t realize until well after it happened.

…

What was she thinking about?

So warm…

Thump…

Thump…

Thump…

You could only really compare it to an orgasm. It was a gross metaphor, she was aware, but it was true.

Thump…

Thump…

Thump…

She didn’t care anymore. That's what she told herself every morning. Every night. Every time the world took a shit on her. She didn’t care. She didn’t care if she died. She didn’t care if it hurt. She didn’t care who she brought down along the way.

She just didn’t care.

Thump…

Thump…

Thump…

…

Where…

Where was she?

Light started to flash in her eyes, causing Jinx to groan and sit up. The cigarette in her fingers was hot, recently lit. Wait… not a cigarette. A joint. In her other hand… A bottle.

Still so warm. Still so nice.

Thump…

Thump…

She was on leather. The bench seat of her truck. The light was coming from… A street lamp. No, not a street lamp, a neon sign for a shop. Huh.

She took a swig of whatever she was holding, only to find that it was empty. She grunted and tossed it into the back seat, putting the joint back in her mouth and taking a deep inhale. Her head bumped against the window frame of her truck and she exhaled. Except the window was still up and all she really managed to do was blow smoke in her face and start a coughing fit which really sucked.

Was she thinking too fast? Everything felt so slow. And warm.

Thump…

Thump…

“Jinx, you okay?”

Her eyes fluttered open. Now she was in a white tiled room. Well, to call it white was generous, it was more like a mildewed tan.

“Jinx? Come on girl, get back into it.”

Fuck was talking to her? She didn’t know that voice. Suddenly there was something cold and wet being thrown in her face, and the shock forced her back into the world for a second.

Her head shot up as cold sink water splashed from her face back down to the pipes. A broken mirror, with a broken girl, looked back at her. Her eyes were wide and unnaturally dilated. It was Jinx. There was another girl, the one who splashed water in her face. She had dark skin, long black hair, big brown eyes with a red haze in the whites. Wow… she was pretty. Jinx had no idea who she was.

“Let’s go, the hell happened to you?” The stranger girl asked.

“I-I dunno.”

She was pulling Jinx towards the door.

“Then get your head out of your flat ass girl, we’re trying to party. Stop being a mope and have some fun.”

Oh… They were having fun?

Bright flashing lights of every color imaginable assaulted her eyes. She threw her arms up to defend herself and tripped backwards.

Thump…

Thump…

She landed on a bed she didn’t recognize. There was a guy she didn’t recognize on top of her. They were kissing. It felt good.

Thump…

Thump…

Wait.

Her eyes shot open. Who the fuck was this guy?

“S-Stop.”

She pushed against his bare chest, and he backed up.

“Shit, sorry. Did I do something wrong? I’m not used to girls like you so, if I made you uncomfortable I’m real sorry.”

Oh. He was kinda nice. Cute too. Guess that’s why they were in bed together. Maybe she could just relax and enjoy it.

Girls like her… Lux had said something similar to that.

Lux.

Like a slap, awareness came back to her. Far too quickly then she wanted, and she was hyper aware of her surroundings. She didn’t recognize any of it.

Oh fuck.

Oh fuck oh fuck oh gods no fuck. Where was she?

“H-Hey, seriously are you okay?”

Jinx’s breathing increased as the situation became more clear. She was naked, and so was he, and they were on a bed. The room was too nice to be someone's place though, too sterile. A hotel probably. She could see a pile of clothes on the ground, a mix of her’s and the mystery guy’s.

Fuck… Fuck this isn’t what she wanted… Why… how…

“F-Fuck… I need to go.”

She didn’t wait for his reply before she rolled to the side and forced herself up. Her legs didn’t like that option, and she nearly fell over from the sudden weight. Her shoulder slammed against the wall, and groggily she stumbled towards the clothes.

“I’m sorry I didn't mean to- I mean for real I wasn’t trying to make you upset.”

She ignored him and grabbed her clothes, throwing herself into the bathroom and slamming the door shut behind her. She pushed the lock in and leaned back with a moment of relief, breath still uneven and haggard.

First things first though. Clothes.

It wasn’t like this was the first time she’d gotten into a situation like this. There were things she knew to do, ways to center herself. Fuck it wasn’t easy though. Every piece of clothes she put back on was done with trembling hands, barely able to hold even that simple weight. When she had everything but her boots on, she sat down on the toilet seat and reached into her pocket.

Her phone was there. That was good at least.

She pulled it out and checked the time. Hopefully it hadn’t been too long.

11:46 PM
Sunday

…

“Fuck.”

She nearly dropped her phone with the realization. It had been over a full day. Everything was a haze, she barely remembered any of it. All she wanted to do was relax for a little bit, not this. Why was she like this? Why did it fucking happen? Why couldn’t she just have a day where she didn’t immeasurably fuck up her life?

All because one fucking girl was upset at her because they had sex. It wasn’t even that big of a deal and she just went mental over it. Fuck. Oh fuck. Fuck…

She exited the bathroom and grabbed her shoes, not bothering to answer the call of the guy behind her. Part of her felt a little shitty for leaving him like that, but Jinx just wanted to go home.

She was right about being in a hotel, rows of rooms sprawled out around her. She managed to find the elevator and get to the ground floor, then to the lobby, and then out into the night.

It was cold, and her clothes weren’t exactly helping. How she had managed to change out of what she wore to the concert and into this was far beyond her. Short shorts, thigh highs, and a top that was practically a bikini. It was a vibe without a doubt. But not for how she felt right now. Right now all she wanted was her favorite hoodie, and her blanket, and Mister Bunny.

Fuck… where even was she? Still in Zaun at the very least. Was her truck around? She had gotten into it at some point, she was pretty sure. Could she even drive home in this condition?

She couldn’t do this. She didn’t want it, she just wanted to go home. There was only one option for Jinx at this point.

She speed dialed Vi as she started to search for her truck.

The tone started to beep in her ear as she prayed desperately her sister was still up. Please, she just needed her sister, just please let her pick up.

Finally the other end came to life.

“Hello?”

“V-Vi?” She cried as she spoke. She didn’t even realize she was crying.

“Powder? Powder, what's wrong?”

“Can you come get me? I… I don’t know where I am…”

“Oh fuck, uh, fuck just give me a second. Yeah, it’s my sister, she’s in trouble. I’m sorry I gotta go now.” She must’ve been talking to Caitlyn. “Okay, okay Powder just-just stay calm and tell me what happened.”

“I… I don’t know. It’s just- blurry and…”

She could hear Vi’s breath increase as no doubt she started running to her car.

“Can you give me an address, street, anything?”

Realizing she was an idiot for not thinking of this before, Jinx opened up her text messages with Vi, and shared her location.

“Did you get that?”

“Yeah I did. Okay… Okay it’s gonna be 20 minutes. Are you safe right now? Do I need to get Cait to call someone?”

“No, no you don’t have to call the cops, idiot.” She laughed the words through her tears.

“Alright fucker I don’t know the situation! I thought that- Jinx?”

Jinx just kept laughing and crying.

“I’m just… I’m just really fucking glad you answered.”

--

The day after, Vi and Cait went to go get her truck and bring it home. She tried her best to explain the situation… and unfortunately that meant telling Vi she had shot up. Vi was pissed, she deserved to be, but more than anything she just kept saying how worried she was. Lots of tears on both ends. Lots of hugs. Officer bitch even seemed worried about Jinx. Of course, that did mean she wasn’t allowed to drive for a few days. Not until her head was on straight. It was extremely fair, and Jinx was still kind of pissed about it.

So like a good girl, she went to class, talked to Lux, went back to her room, and then they fucked again, aaaand here they were. Things were tense at home, but it was her own fault so… oh well. She had managed to convince Vi and Cait not to check her room (to be fair she didn’t even have any more shimmer there) and although she overheard Cait and Vi get into another argument about what she did, things weren’t awful.

Around a month passed. Her and Lux continued their relationship, in secret, Vi and Cait continued to fight and make up over and over again, and she herself kept being the useless junkie she was classically known to be. She still shot up, and she still drank, and she still smoked, but one thing she got out of this, was that she never fucking left the house like that again.

It crossed some kind of line she drew, which was weird considering that Jinx had done that same thing so many times before. Usually though, she ended up in a strange bed, or at home, and she never stopped halfway through to call for big sis to come rescue her. What was the difference this time then?

Lux. It was Lux. Her and Lux had fucked and, in some weird way that created a new line. It was really bizarre because even days after when they had properly begun their FWB relationship, they never stated they would be exclusive. Lux would without a doubt, there was no way she would ever fuck multiple people, but Jinx never planned to keep such an oath. But when she woke up with that guy on top of her it just… it just all came crashing down. She felt like she’d betrayed Lux. It didn’t make any fucking sense though, because the previous morning to that Lux had pretty strongly said “I am unhappy with the fact that we had sex.”

Strange as it was, it happened though, and even when she partied sober the week after they started, and she had the chance to sleep with someone, she didn’t. It was all a bit confusing, and all a bit new. In essence, she guessed because now that her and Lux were fucking, she didn’t need to seek out sex elsewhere. Lux was fucking leagues above most of her usuals, and she was really tender afterwards too. Carin for example, wouldn’t have the decency to get her water and snuggle under the covers and hold her after they fucked, but Lux always did those things.

So why bother looking for sex when you already have the perfect girl, asking you to warm her bed?

--

So a month and three weeks into the semester Jinx woke up for her monday classes. Normally she’d already be skipping class as much as she could at this point, but it was always worth showing up to Civil Engineering, just to be with Lux for a bit. With a groggy yawn she rolled out of bed and walked down the stairs.

Caitlyn was sitting at the bar, a hot cup of coffee in one hand and a newspaper in the other. Jinx wasn’t aware people still used those, but if there was some person who still did weird old fashion shit, it was probably Cait. Caitlyn gave her a half smile that said “I don’t know how to interact with you because you’re a known drug abuser, and I ate your sister out last night” and Jinx returned it with her own smile that said “Trust me I don’t know how to interact with you either you fucking cop asshole who eats my sister out on the weekends.”

Their relationship had improved all things considered.

“Coffee?” Caitlyn asked.

Jinx nodded and sat down on the opposite seat of the bar as Caitlyn walked over to the pot on the stove, and poured her a mug. Jinx didn’t really know how to react when Caitlyn added just enough creamer and the traditional 5 dumps of sugar into the mug as well. Vi must’ve told her how Jinx liked it. Creepy.

“Vi already leave?” Jinx asked, taking the mug from Caitlyn’s hand. Cait nodded as she picked up the paper again.

“She has her eye doctor's appointment today.”

Jinx narrowed her eyes just a bit.

“Oooh right, the appointment you two fought over for a god damn month.”

Cait scoffed and shook her head.

“Well it wouldn’t have taken a whole month if your sister wasn’t so stubborn and would just accept that she needs glasses.”

Jinx laughed at that. Caitlyn laughed too. This was disgusting.

“Thanks for the coffee.” Jinx said and left for her room, refusing to question her own steadfast hatred of Caitlyn any further.

When the door shut but behind her and she trudged inside, her foot struck something. Not hard enough to cause an issue though, the mystery object gave at the force and slid away. Confused, Jinx leaned down and tossed the dirty clothes hiding it to the side. Oh shit, it was the package she had gotten the day she lost her shit.

In the rush of everything she’d completely forgotten about it (which she thought was fair) and somehow it must’ve gotten buried in the room. Sitting down at her desk she pulled out a knife and gently slit open the plastic, pulling open the rest and reaching in for its contents. Inside was a much smaller, thick envelope, and a folded up letter. It read:

To the daughter of one Silco:

Thank you for your patience regarding the monetary compensation that is owed to you via your inheritance. As you know, due to the nature of Silco’s business and practice, there are many legal matters regarding where exactly his sum of personal assets is to be distributed. While you are officially listed on his personal will as the sole inheritor, it’s impossible to simply transfer his full assets to you due to the many claims, disputes, and legal implications plaguing his business. In the meantime, we’ve provided a sum of his inheritance that is owed to you regardless. Thank you for understanding the complexity of this issue. Have a nice day. We will contact you again as soon as the legal issues are cleared and we’re able to provide you with the proper sum of money. If you have any questions, you can call us at ***-***-****.

Jinx rolled her eyes. “Legal Issues”, yeah right, that was just a bunch of bullshit. The real reason Silco’s inheritance hadn’t all gone to her was because the new Chem barons were too busy carving up the remains of his empire. And with that came his money. Not like Vi would let them keep the money if they got it anyway, if that happened she’d definitely pull the moral bullshit card and force them to donate it all to charity or some shit.

Jinx was an asshole for saying that, but it was true.

Well at the very least, she had this. After all there was certainly no reason to tell Vi about this package. She sliced open the smaller envelope, and a tightly tied pack of bills came out. She picked it up and thumbed through it. Not bad. $200. Nothing to write home about but, hey who was she to turn away free money. Well, technically speaking she was supposed to get far more than this, but she knew for a fact none of that money was actually going to end up in her pocket.

She tossed the wad of cash onto her desk along with her coffee and crashed back down on the bed. It'd been a while since she’d been forced to think about that whole situation. Dad, her upbringing, the effects it had on her, the place she is now.

If Silco had never found her, would she be like this? A broken mound of flesh who scars herself just to stop thinking for a little bit? Would she even be alive if Silco hadn’t found her? There wasn’t anyone who would’ve been willing to protect her. Or… at least anyone who actually had the means to. Back in those days Ekko would’ve done it in a heartbeat. But for all his spunk, what was a kid 2 inches shorter than her gonna do at age 11?

She missed her Dad so fucking much. And it hurt to miss him, because she knew how fucked up that was. Silco hurt so many people, brought so much suffering, molded Jinx into the mess she was today. And yet he was so loving, he cared so much, he was always there to give advice, always there to give a hug, always there to tell her everything would be okay.

How was she supposed to choose between the two realities of Silco? Was it wrong to love him in the end? And if it was wrong, does that mean it was wrong to be herself?

Jinx rolled over in the bed and pulled the covers up. She wasn’t going to class today.

--

Around 2:10 Jinx’s phone buzzed on her pillow as Lux sent a text.

//Lux: Hey I know you weren’t in class today but Professor Viktor gave us back the results for our first project. We got an A!//

That cracked a smile into her scowl.

//Jinx: Oh, cool//

//Lux: Come on, you have to be at least a bit pleased. We put so much work into it, at least feel a little pride. And if we keep it up we’ll ace this class no problem.//

Jinx didn’t really have the energy to tell Lux she didn’t give a shit what their grade was so long as they passed. Well, Lux should already know that. Maybe she was just happy since grades are important to her. She was cute when she got excited. So much of their first few interactions was just frustration and anger, it was nice to be able to see this side of her. Jinx imagined that big smile on her pretty dumb face, addictive laughter dripping from her lips, perfect gilded hair framing that gorgeous-

Jinx’s chest fluttered just a bit, her cheeks getting warm as she thought about Lux. That was… new. Not new in that she didn’t know how pretty Lux was but this was different. Like that single moment at the concert when their eyes had met and all time seemed to stop. It wasn’t like usual, her thoughts weren’t thinking about Lux’s body, or how hot she was, or any of those more base considerations.

Within the vein of that, Jinx hadn’t slept with a single person since her and Lux had started their relationship. Still they had never once claimed things were exclusive, and Jinx hadn’t intended that to be the case at all. But the thought of being with someone else now just felt so weird. So wrong, which made no sense. And the thought of Lux sleeping with someone else.

Jinx shook that one away as fast as possible. She unfortunately knew herself well enough to know how she would react if she imagined that.

Now she felt all warm and tingly, just from the thought of imagining Lux’s smile and laugh. She wanted to wrap her arms around Lux and hold her, bury her face into the crook of Lux’s neck and just stay there. Just exist in her presence. She was so fucking warm all the god damn time. Soft too.

…

…

This wasn’t okay. These were not at all the thoughts she wanted to have right now. She pushed them away in her head and tried to think about something else. It wasn’t working very well but at least she could pretend these thoughts weren’t there.

But… they were. They were there and it infuriated Jinx. Because she knew it wasn’t real. And there was no chance Lux would share those same feelings in the first place. She’d learned the hard way that those kinds of feelings only lead to more confusion. Ekko was proof of that, he made the same mistake with Jinx, and he only got hurt.

Not that these feelings were feelings of romance but… if they were it wouldn’t matter.

Because romance wasn’t real.

That was a fundamental truth Jinx had accepted for years now. And the people like Vi and Ekko who chased those feelings were only making it worse for themselves down the line. That was reality.

Her phone buzzed again, and she was pulled out of her head.

//Lux: Do you think you could come over at 4 again today? I wanna talk about the project, and maybe we could hang out for a bit.//

//Lux: And I guess maybe if you wanted we could also maybe DO something together.//

//Lux: But only if you want to.//

//Lux: If not that’s okay and we can just totally watch a movie or something.//

//Lux: But if you wanted to I’d be down.//

Jinx rolled her eyes. They’d been fucking for a month now and Lux still acted like a virgin. She was so cute. Her cheeks turned warm again, and she forced herself to pretend the last statement did not happen.

//Jinx: Yeah I’ll head over then. Stop being such a weirdo tho, if you wanna fuck just ask :p//

//Lux: Now hang on that wasn’t at all what I was saying!//

//Lux: I was saying if YOU wanted to then I suppose maybe we could do that because I have nothing on my schedule for tonight.//

//Lux: I wasn’t saying at all that I WANTED to do that with you I was just pointing out that it’s an option.//

//Lux: So there.//

//Lux: …//

//Lux: So do you want to?//

She was so cute.

…

“Fuck.”

--

The door opened with a creak, and Lux smiled as saw Jinx.

“Hey.”

“Sup.”

Jinx followed Lux inside, and the two crashed down onto her bed. It had become a ritual they did now, pretty much whenever they hung out they would do so sitting on the bed, Lux on the right and Jinx on the left.

“Ok, so, I’ve got the rubric on my laptop here so I can go through everything we did right and wrong. First, regarding the scale…”

Jinx wasn’t embarrassed to say she immediately zoned out. Lux droned on and on, Jinx occasionally nodded as if she was listening, overall it wasn’t an ideal situation. Finally though, she came to a stop and the two began their normal routine of hanging out.

Lux got a book out and started to take notes on it as she read, Jinx took out her BandleBoy and booted up Dim Spirits II, and they just spent time in each other's space. They chatted about this and that, things you normally did when two friends spent time like this. Jinx’s mind wandered every now and then to her thoughts from earlier (which caused her to die to an easy boss more times than needed) and that made things a bit awkward but, overall it was nice.

Until Lux decided relaxing time was over.

“J-Jinx? Your arm! Are you okay?”

Jinx paused her game and turned her head confused. Lux was staring directly at her left arm. Now why would she-

…

Fuck.

Jinx broke her normal routine today, she hadn’t remembered to go about it before she came to Lux’s since she skipped class. Which meant she didn’t put concealer on her arm to hide her track marks.

On instinct Jinx’s hand dropped her system and slapped over the backside of her elbow, as if hiding them at this point was gonna do any good. Lux clearly did not understand the situation.

“Did something happen? Did you get a cut? Do you need help? Do-”

“Lux.”

It was far firmer than she usually spoke. It quieted Lux in an instant. Jinx took a few shaky breaths before turning her face up to meet Lux’s eyes. She had to explain herself at this point. It wasn’t like Lux didn’t know she used shimmer, this wouldn’t change anything, but still.

“I didn’t get cut or anything. These aren’t new wounds.”

Lux cocked her head with confusion, and Jinx silently cursed the girls sheltered upbringing. It would be so much easier if she didn’t have to explain it, but she really didn’t have any other choice. Well, actually she could just say “pretend it’s not there” but at this point that felt a tad bit pointless. With a deep sigh she slowly moved her hand away, and adjusted her arm so Lux could see.

“T-These are track marks. They’re scars you get from… f-from…”

Jinx’s whole body started to shake a little at that point, and the words just wouldn’t come out of her mouth. Her tongue felt too fat in her mouth, and her throat felt too thick to breathe. That aching weakness that sank into her knees wherever she thought about needles slipped in, quickly moving to infect her elbows just as fast. Her ragged inhales became more uneven, and all at once she started to feel herself fall apart.

Until Lux laced her fingers through Jinx’s. Her eyes shot down to where Lux was now gently squeezing, an affirmative and gentle notion. When their eyes met again, Lux was only filled with worry and compassion. The tremors faded just a little, and she was suddenly able to speak again.

“From shooting up too much. Over a long period of time.”

Lux’s hand twitched at hearing it, but that kindness in her eyes never faded. Jinx took a deep breath and continued.

“Shimmer is something that can be used in a lot of different ways. I-I just happen to be someone that requires injection as the most effective method. I’ve tried the others and they just don’t do what I need, so I do this. T-That is to say I have to inject it into my veins on my arm for it to reach my brain the way I like. S-So you know how when you get your blood drawn, you get a bruise from the needle for a day or two. Yeah this is like that, but, over a long period of time from shooting up. Your veins get damaged, and those bruises become scars along your veins. When I was younger, my Dad always used concealer to make his scars seem less scary, so I figured I could do the same thing. Yeah t-that’s it. It’s because I shoot up. A lot.” Jinx looked down to her discarded gaming device to try and avoid Lux’s face.

There was a deafening silence that followed after, and Jinx refused to look back up. She couldn’t bear to see the pity or disgust in her eyes. She bit her bottom lip hard as the tremors started to get worse again. Fuck she should’ve just lied. Lux was gonna be mad or something and then-

Her mind turned off when Lux’s fingers brushed under her chin, and forced their gazes together. No pity. No disgust. Just warmth.

“You’re… addicted. Right?”

Jinx swallowed hard and nodded.

“That must be hard. I knew that you used shimmer, but you’ve never really talked about it, and I was always too afraid to ask. But, you don’t really do it because you want to. Do you?”

Jinx shook her head.

“Would you be okay telling me about it? Would it help to let it out?”

…

In all her years since Singed forced this addiction onto her, Jinx realized she’d never truly explained it to a single soul. Not even her sister. Jinx nodded.

Lux’s fingers left Jinx’s cheek, instead moving back to hold Jinx’s hand again. She didn’t speak after that. Just waited. Never in a million years had she ever thought she’d do this, but here she was.

“When I was 18 (I’m guessing, exact ages are hard for me), Vi got out of prison. I don’t wanna talk about why she was there, but the important detail is it wasn’t her fault. It happened when I was young, and that’s when my Dad became my legal guardian. His name was Silco, and he was a drug lord. When Vi got out, her and her girlfriend came to get me. I-I didn’t really understand the situation, and Dad kept telling me that Vi just wanted to hurt me. I didn’t know what to do, a-and I ended up doing something stupid. Long story short, I tried to k-kill myself. I told myself I was trying to help Dad when I did it, but I don’t think that’s true. It didn’t work, and I got really fucked up, like verge of death levels of fucked up.”

She adjusted in place and squeezed Lux’s hands. Lux squeezed back, a silent urge that it was okay to keep going.

“Dad found me, and he brought me to this doctor to save me. His name is Singed, and he’s a psychopath. Dad just wanted him to save me, and instead he turned me into this fucked up experiment. I never learned the details, but the gist was he thought shimmer would be effective in my recovery surgery. It was, and he proved it by nearly overdosing me. I… It… T-The point is that after that happened, I felt like I needed shimmer. The sudden withdrawal of that much shimmer to none nearly killed me, and for a week after it happened I did everything I could to be on it at all times. It slowed down after that, and eventually I moved in with Vi because Dad… died… s-soon after my surgery. Ever since I’ve been addicted to it. I can’t go more than a week or two without facing serious withdrawal, no matter how hard my sister tries to get me off it. So… yeah. TLDR my Dad let a psychopath force me into a shimmer addiction after a failed suicide attempt, and i’ve been literally trapped in it ever since. Bet you’re glad you asked, eh blondie.”

Lux didn’t say anything to that, which was pretty fair. After all, after hearing just the abridged version without the extra fucked up addition that Jinx killed her own father, or that Jinx also killed her other father, or that it was Jinx’s fault Vi went to jail, anybody would be speechless.

“Sorry I ruined the mood. I-I should probably go home now-”

Lux stopped her for moving an inch with a hug.

“I’m sorry Jinx. I’m so so sorry that happened to you.” Her voice was shaking, as if she was closer to tears than Jinx was.

That put a weak smile onto Jinx’s face. She really was such a good person.

“C’mon, it was years ago. I’m used to it now, it’s whatever. No use in you crying over me like this.”

Lux nodded, sniffling before slowly pulling back, and looking at Jinx, her face hardened by surprise resolve.

“I-I just want you to know that it doesn’t matter to me, okay? Whatever you did, whatever happened to you, it doesn’t change what I think of you. The past doesn’t define you, right? That’s what my brother always tells me. We can keep going, we can change who we are.”

Jinx didn’t really know how to respond to that. She knew it was true, she’d done it before twice now, and yet something about the way Lux said it just felt different. Eventually she gave up on it and bumped her head against Lux.

“You sure seem understanding of my situation. Most people aren’t.”

Lux nodded as she finished composing herself, using the sleeve of her shirt to wipe an errant tear away.

“Well, I guess I understand the feeling. I haven’t been through nearly as much as you, but I'm trapped in something forced onto me as well.”

Jinx gave her a quizzical look, eyes probing for more. Lux abided.

“It’s not nearly as long but, the only reason I’m permitted to study here is to broaden my horizons for when I go home to Demacia to continue the Crownguard legacy through politics. Once I get my degree, I get put into a pretty birdcage and vomit the words that my parents write me to say. Or, well, that’s what they want to happen. I’ve got other plans though, you could say. I’m gonna go into politics and use that to push away from my family, and get the life I truly want to live.”

“You really want to live a life of politics?”

Lux shook her head immediately.

“Of course not, but considering my circumstance it’s the best I can do. It’s my only real route of escaping my family and being free. I don’t like studying political science at all, but if it gets me out then I’ll suffer through it.”

“Hmm.”

Jinx looked down away from Lux, running the words back over her head. She’d always assumed that Lux had a pretty cushy home life, boring rich parents who sheltered her and probably didn’t even understand what being gay meant in the slightest. This was far more cruel than her original assumption. Even if she was trapped by addiction, Jinx could do anything she wanted, pursue any craft or path she liked. Lux couldn’t even pick that much.

“If you had the chance,” Jinx began, “what would you do instead of politics? Y’know, if you could have a life where you got to pick any career you wanted with no backlash from your parents.”

Lux sat on that one for a while, before getting up from the bed and picking up that messenger bag she always carried around.

“Photography I guess. I really like capturing the moments I see in the world. Like, little moments of light peeking through to remind you, or inspire you, or to channel emotion. It’s a beautiful art, y’know?”

Jinx didn’t, but nodded anyway.

“I’ve never had much inspiration though, everything I make usually feels really basic. I know all the techniques, I just never could manage to get that spark. Which sucks, cause I have to submit a photo soon for my photography class and I can’t figure out what to do.”

“Well, art is all about emotion, like you said, right? Like… it’s not the best comparison but with my mechanics, function is only half the fun. I want things to look good too. Fishbones has a shark head around the headlight because my Dad really loved marine biology, and sea monster legends. So, It’s kind of like a remembrance of him.” Even if he did a lot of shitty things. “So, what matters is the emotion you want to show, I guess.”

Lux stayed silent for a long time, before her head shot up and she looked at Jinx with a wild gleam.

“I… I think I just hit inspiration.”

--

“You want ME to model for you?”

Lux closed the door of Jinx’s truck behind her, that over excited look in her eyes. They currently stood outside the ruined building where the Firelights had performed, at Lux’s insistence that Jinx drive her there right that instant. Jinx figured it was for camera stuff, but she had not signed up to model.

“Yes, I do. I have the perfect Idea for a shot and I really need you specifically to help me pull this off. I know it’s short notice, but it won’t be difficult at all I promise. I’m just gonna sit you against one of those support beams in there, and you just have to pose the way I tell you. Oh, uh, and I’m gonna tie your wrists together.”

…

“Fucking what?”

“I know I know it seems weird but this is gonna be amazing. Please Jinx, I’ve never had a moment like this, something is just… it… well… I’ve read about these magical inspired moments of art, everything just falls together into place exactly how it was meant to be. I can’t explain it, and it sounds crazy but I think this is one of those moments.”

The sun lowered on the horizon, casting an ethereal glow to that gilded hair of hers, flowing in the wind. It was sudden but… but…

Lux was beautiful when she was excited.

Jinx didn’t realize it yet, but she was too hopelessly in love to refuse.

“Okay. Sure. I’ll do it.”

“Really?” Lux grabbed her hands, like an excited little animal. Her eyes were so big and bright like this. Jinx figured fighting an army by yourself was easier than hiding her blush in that moment.

“Yeah… Why not right? What you just said to me is crazy, you’re right. But, if it’s crazy you need, I guess I’m your girl.”

Lux practically squealed with excitement jumping up, still holding Jinx’s hands.

“Yes yes yes! Thank you so much Jinx. You’re not gonna regret this I promise. Ok let’s do this. First I need to bind your wrists together.”

“Yeah…”

Lux didn’t even seem to realize the implication with that. Jinx cursed her virgin mind as the two walked into the ruined building.

--

“Ok… move your leg up just a little bit.” Lux said.

“R-Right or left leg?”

“Right please.”

Jinx did as she was told, awkwardly shifting in the dusty room as Lux crouched and adjusted with dials and buttons on her camera.

“Ok right there! Yeah. Yeah that’s perfect. That’s just right. Really good. Just like that Jinx. Goood.”

…

…

Fuck.

This was supposed to be a photography shoot for school. The way Lux was talking (not to mention the brown leather cord around her wrists) made it feel like a shoot for something else though. And the worst part was being ordered around by Lux, and then vocally praised when she did it right was really really hot. Lux clearly had no inkling of an issue, and kept going. This was hell. Shit tier erotica book hell.

“Hm… It’s just missing something. Hmmm… I wonder if- Jinx do you have any cigarettes with you?”

Jinx squinted her nose and gestured with her face towards the door.

“In my truck yeah, my lighter too. Why?”

“I just had an idea, hold on.”

Lux took off without another word, coming back soon after and jogging up to Jinx, carton of cigarettes and lighter in hand.

“You're cool to smoke one, right?”

What the fuck was happening?

“Yeah I mean, why wouldn’t I?”

“Great.” Lux popped open the carton and slid one out, pointing it at Jinx’s lips. “Can you open?”

God fucking damnit. A shiver ran down Jinx’s spine. Nonetheless, Jinx opened her mouth, and Lux popped the cigarette in for her to hold with her teeth.

“Good. That should line up well. Here I’m gonna light it, and then put the cigarette in your hand. Point upwards with it. But hold the smoke in until I say ‘blow’, okay?”

Jinx nodded, trying her damndest to hide her blushes in the rays of sunlight coming through the windows.

Still in her photo obsessed fervor though, Lux obviously had no idea. In a moment the lighter sparked to life, Jinx sucked in a long drag of Zaunite Specials, and Lux took the cigarette from her mouth and put it between Jinx’s fingers. She ran back to her camera and crouched down into position, barking a few more orders and cooing a ‘good’ when Jinx did it right.

“Alright, blow.”

Jinx exhaled the smoke in a long slow line, watching the haze spread and disperse into a wide and deep cloud. She heard several clicks of the camera until finally the smoke was gone, and Lux moved back up to her feet.

“Alright, let’s do it a few more times.”

Jinx froze in place.

“W-We have to keep doing this?” Jinx’s voice dripped with fear.

“Yeah, I want a good amount of shots to choose from.”

…

Shit tier Erotica Hell.

--

After their embarrassing and sexually charged photo session ended, Lux immediately begged Jinx to come with her to the photo edit labs, where Lux was going to do some final touches. And, mainly because she was developing the habit of doing whatever Lux told her, she agreed. They sat in there for about 2 hours while Lux tinkered and toyed with things Jinx just did not understand. The mechanic in her was curious though, software was always a bit above her head but the tinkering with all these programs really piqued her interest. Not enough to erase her boredom though, so for most of the 2 hours Jinx went back to playing Dim Spirits. Until Lux finally spoke.

“Ok. I think that’s the best I can do right now. Take a look, Jinx. See how your hard work paid off.”

Jinx looked up from her game and wheeled the office chair she’d been doing laps with back to where Lux was working.

There, on the screen, was Jinx.

But it was different than just that. Twilight sunbeams flowed down through the windows of the old building to grant that same ethereal radiance to her that she’d ascribed to Lux. She was sitting on the pillar, but somehow her posture evoked this feeling of dim and grayness that felt like a movie scene. All around her the building decayed and fell apart, a broken building for a broken girl. Her arms were bound by cord, and in her fingers was the Cigarette, smoke trailing upwards. From her open lips and nose a vaporous mass of smoke dripped like poison, swirling and colliding with the dust and light in the air.

Jinx’s eyes were practically glowing, and the veins that sat against her eyes seemed accentuated, like they were even more noticeable than normal. Two of the biggest giveaways she was a shimmer user, all on display. It was sad. She looked so broken, so weak. But even in that there was a person. There was a real person behind all the pain the image displayed. Behind the sadness and the sorrow and the suffering, there was a girl who just wanted to be ok.

It was her.

It was Jinx.

At the top of the screen, Jinx’s eyes caught the title of the file.

‘Trapped’

“Soo…” Lux said, hands fidgeting in her lap, “What do you think?”

It was her. Jinx could only manage to whisper out two words.

“It’s perfect.”

Chapter Text

-Lux-

--

BEEEP… BEEP BEEP BEEP… BEEEEEEEP

A behavior pattern acquired by frequent repetition or physiologic exposure that shows itself in regularity or increased facility of performance. This is classically referred to as a habit. A ritual. A routine. It takes time for a habit to form, for one’s mind to go from conscious choice to complete autonomy.

It was the Saturday morning after Lux had taken her photograph of Jinx down at the old, ruined building by the wharf in Zaun. Several weeks of her new sexual relationship with Jinx. Several weeks of waking up in the same bed. And now, several weeks of turning her alarm off Saturday morning instead of sleeping through it like usual.

Jinx usually grumbled at the piercing sound of the morning, but never made too much of a fuss. More than likely because Lux would turn it off right away, and then come back to cuddle up with Jinx. Such an action always earned a groggy hum of approval as an arm would wrap around her, and she’d feel Jinx’s face press in against the back of her neck.

Lux would smile at the touch, try to surround herself with Jinx as they lazily slept through the morning. While Jinx was usually seemingly averse to touching most people, Lux found that as she got familiar with you (and she was rather familiar with Lux) she would always want to touch. Holding hands in the bed, cuddles, sitting shoulder to shoulder, laying in her lap, anyway they could touch Jinx wanted it. Touch starved was the term, according to the internet, and Jinx was more than certainly touch starved. Lux, however, was realizing she was also probably touch starved.

It made sense from an objective standpoint. Her parents were always cold, Garen wasn’t very touchy in general, so she’d been going this far without constant affection. And now Jinx was giving it to her. Physical affection, sexual affection, emotional affection. Everything was just… good.

And just as she had for the past few weeks, she followed the pattern, and Jinx responded in kind. It made her chest feel warm just to think about, to really visualize the way their relationship had changed. They didn’t know each other for all that long really, but Lux had never connected with someone like this. Combined with an altercation from the previous night, Lux was starting to have a realization.

--

“Uh, hello? Lux?”

Lux froze in her tracks at the sound, turning her head towards it. She had been walking back to her room with a few snacks. She and Jinx were going to watch some anime and apparently (in Jinx’s own words) “You can’t watch High Noon: Demons and Dead Eyes without chips and soda, it’s heresy. Heresy I tell you!”

They had decided a full-on trip to the corner store was probably a bit excessive, so their snack trip was just Lux going down a few floors to the vending machine and getting as much as she could carry. And unfortunately, Jinx’s specific request was quite a lot, and her hands were full, so there was in fact a bag of chips hanging from her mouth.

“Hmm?”

Marcie was there behind her, leaning against the wall, a frown plastered across her face.

“Really? You’re just gonna ignore me saying your name like 5 times and then turn and pretend like you only just heard me?”

The problem was that was exactly what happened. Lux was in her own head thinking about her and Jinx’s evening she hadn’t even noticed Marcie when she walked past her, let alone heard her.

She probably looked pretty dumb, a bag of chips between her teeth and a pile of snacking loot between her arms. Awkwardly she fumbled the bag in her mouth down to the pile, all while Marcy fumed at her.

“Sorry, kind of distracted. What’s up, do you need something?” Lux said, moving a few steps back. This was the last person she wanted to talk to right now, and currently the only obstacle between eating some salty snack while cuddling with her girlf- with her friend and watching anime. She wasn’t liable to such a distraction taking long.

“We gotta talk about you, and the way you’ve been acting this semester.”

Lux frowned. “What do you mean, ‘the way I’ve been acting?’”

“I mean, blowing off my texts, never hanging out with me and the girls, and most of all hanging out with the campus psycho bike Jinx.” She crossed her arms, lobbying the height she had over Lux like it meant something.

“Excuse me?”

“You heard me. We know how much time you two spend together in your room, and going out to concerts, and parties, and whatever other ‘activities’ you two get up to. Are you crazy? She’s certainly crazy, did it rub off on you? Jinx is the literal algae of the social pyramid here. She can’t even afford this school, she’s just another pot head from Zaun. So, what is it then, huh? Did you fall for it too? What does she say, she’s your girlfriend or something?”

G-Girlfriend?

Lux was aghast. She was just trying to get some snacks. Who did Marcie think she was talking bad about her girlf- her friend like that! But… something was weird there.

“First of all,” Lux began, “she’s my partner for Civil Engineering, she and I get along. In fact, we’re watching anime right now, because we got our work done early for the night. So whatever ideas you have in your head, you can drop them. But what do you mean ‘Did you fall for it too?’”

Marcie’s eyes flared for just a moment, just enough for Lux’s trained social perception to catch it. There was history there, more than what Marcie claimed before. But, what about?

“Forget it.” Marcie said, turning on her heel. “Just listen to what I said. You’re making a mistake spending time with that leech. Everyone, and I mean everyone, who tries with her gets hurt. And I don’t mean that figuratively. Have fun with your cheap toy.”

With that Marcie stomped away. Lux refused to dignify her with a reply. But the rest of her walk to Jinx’s room left questions swirling in her mind. ‘Did you fall for it too?’ Fall for what? Did Marcie ‘fall for’ something related to Jinx? Surely if the two had previously shared a relationship, Jinx would have told Lux, right?

Lux never had considered herself a jealous person before. Marcie proved her wrong.

A-And what a ridiculous notion that her and Jinx were girlfriends! That they were dating! Even if they were doing things together, it was completely platonic. That was very well established. There wasn’t anything more.

Beyond that was there more to Jinx than she realized? ‘Everyone around her gets literally hurt, not figuratively.’ Not to mention she noticed some of the mannerisms Jinx had, especially when they were in certain areas of Zaun. Her first response to a sound, or someone calling for them was to reach towards her hip. Lux didn’t like to assume, but it was pretty obvious what that kind of motion would be. Not to mention, her father was a drug lord, and she’d grown up in that dangerous environment. She was unstable, that was true without a doubt, but was she dangerous? Dangerous to Lux?

Finally, Lux reached her dorm, and with questions still in her mind, she managed to get the door open.

Jinx was sitting on Lux’s bed, knees pulled up to her chest and her arms wrapped around, holding that gaming system she always carried around. Her eyes were glued intently to the screen, and her teeth were firmly clenched down onto her bottom lips, something Jinx did when she was either focused, nervous, horny, stressed, excited, or annoyed. Bit of a mixed bag. Once Lux walked in though, Jinx’s head turned towards her and she perked up, like a dog that just heard its owner come home. A big goofy smile crawled across her lips when their eyes met.

…

How could anyone that adorable be dangerous?

Whatever Marcie was talking about, Lux didn’t care. Whatever people thought about Jinx, Lux didn’t care.

All Lux cared about was seeing that smile. And then, in the morning with Jinx wrapped around her, her realization was complete.

Lux had a crush on Jinx.

--

It seemed stupid to call it a crush. They were regularly sleeping together, y’know? But Jinx made it pretty clear that it wasn’t romantic, and Lux thought that was what she wanted as well. But all it took was a new habit. Alarm rings, turn it off, snuggles, arm slips around, nuzzle to the neck. How could anyone resist that?

In retrospect, it would seem obvious Lux was developing romantic feelings for Jinx. Her recent ‘girlfriend’ slip up wasn’t new, it had been plaguing her for over a week now, casually misrepresenting their own relationship in her head. But Lux, as she tended to do, ignored and repressed it, choosing not to deal with those new complicated feelings. She’s still only recently realized she was a lesbian, developing a crush on her groupmate/enemy turned friend with benefits was just too much (Gods their relationship was complex).

But Marcie had forced it out into the forefront with their confrontation. As Lux had learned you can only deny something so long before someone comes and gives you a push, making it impossible to deny your feelings anymore. The problem was she knew Jinx didn’t return those feelings. As was stated when they began having “hate sex” (It was maybe only hate sex the first time or two) their relationship was nothing more than friends with benefits. Jinx wanted them to be friends who had deeply intimate sexual relations which usually brought about incredible emotional vulnerability that led to the deepening of said friendship. That wasn’t romance, right?

But, in reality Lux was okay keeping their relationship platonic. Ok maybe ‘okay’ wasn’t the right word for it. She was content. Sure, she wanted them to become romantic, and sure she wanted to kiss Jinx goodbye and whisper her feelings to Jinx and sure she wanted Jinx to share her feelings with Lux, but friends was good too. Anything that let her stay with Jinx. That was… healthy. Probably.

So, realization or not, Lux didn’t say a word to Jinx. Their lazy morning was nice, and eventually the two decided to go out for brunch at the Sumpsnipe Bite, the same diner where they’d had their first misunderstanding turned fight turned… whatever you would call it. Their relationship was strangely volatile then, despite only knowing each other for two days. Then again, maybe that was just the nature of being around Jinx. Things would be volatile. But her good far outweighed the occasional bad. At least… so far.

“Blondie?” Jinx mumbled with a mouth full of bacon.

“Oh, sorry. I’ve just been in my own head a bit today.” She went about eating her own pancakes, trying to stop thinking about how nice it would be if they were properly dating.

“Mm, I get that.” Jinx said with a swallow and quick gulp of coffee. “Especially since I have to help my sister’s bitch of a girlfriend later.”

Lux rolled her eyes. She sure liked to rant about Vi’s unnamed girlfriend. Lux wondered if she’d ever get the chance to meet her, whoever she was. Let alone the girlfriend, she wondered if she would even get to meet Vi. She’d heard so much about Jinx’s sister but, still never a face to a name.

“What do you even have to do that’s soo terrible.”

“She’s got somewhere to be tonight or something, but her car’s been acting up. It’s cheaper to have me fix your car than go to a shop so, voilà. And as funny as it would be to sabotage her car instead, I think I’d definitely get thrown in jail for that.”

Lux giggled and poked her fork towards Jinx.

“With how much you talk about her, should I be jealous?”

Jinx looked at her with horrified eyes before mimicking a vomiting motion over the side of the table. Lux laughed, and Jinx laughed. Gods this was nice.

“Yeah,” Jinx started. “She’s the last person I’d ever pick, trust me. And besides Blondie, you really don’t have to be jealous about anyone. You’re easily my number one girl.” She winked and went back to destroying her bacon.

Oh.

Oh…

That was not what Lux needed right now. Was it hot in here? She decided to see if burying herself in her pancakes and refusing to look at Jinx would make the heat go away. It didn’t but at least it gave her plausible deniability.

“So, what are you doing later?” Jinx asked.

“Oh, probably just studying since you’re busy. My grades have been falling just a bit since we started… y-y’know…”

“Blondie you can just say ‘since we started having sex’ like my guy, we aren’t middle schoolers.”

“Shut it. It’s still embarrassing for me to say it.”

Jinx eyed her for a long second before leaning in a bit closer. From under the table her boot nudged against Lux’s canvas sneakers.

“Maybe I like seeing you all embarrassed.”

Why was she like this? Why did Lux have to like it so much?

“N-Not here.” Lux whined.

Jinx grinned like a jackass and leaned back, winking again at Lux before turning her attention to her coffee.

“Fine, you’re right, not here. That said, you’re really just gonna go home and study? Like, after I do my shit, I’m probably gonna play video games with Vi or something, maybe go out and hang with Ekko. You should really get out and do more man. Be a bit more wild and shit.”

Hmm… Wild wasn’t exactly Lux’s game but, she supposed a lot of her choices recently could be considered ‘wild’. She went to that concert with Jinx, and occasionally went to other small parties, also with Jinx, and began to have casual sex, also with Jinx.

Hmm. Jinx was in every single category there. Maybe it would be good for her to do something on her own. But, what?

After more flirting, posturing, and eating, the two finished their meal and left. Jinx dropped Lux back off at campus, and she was alone. The drive home had only further solidified Lux’s desire to do something ‘wild’. Wild probably wasn’t the right word though, she just needed something that wasn’t studying, reading, or watching TV to do. Once she was home, she scoured for things to do in Piltover related to her interests. Much to her surprise, she actually found something.

--

A few hours later, Lux hopped off the bus and found herself in the heart of Piltover. It was 7 PM now, and the evening foot traffic swarmed around her. Lux did her best to try and politely sift through the crowd, and eventually she found her way to her mark.

The Piltover Metropolitan Gym and Recreation center.

Entry was easy, just a small fee and a quick ask as to where Gym 3 was, and she was off. There weren’t too many people around at this hour, it turned out, and she could hear the sounds of activity even a full hallway down from the gym.

A thudding of a ball against the court, the squeaking of sneakers, voices calling to each other muffled by the distance. There was a distinct and common nervousness that filled Lux’s stomach, but there was also a swarming excitement. It had been way too long since she’d gotten to play, and just the sounds brought her back to the energy she’d felt in high school, out on the court with her team.

Lux made it to the door to Gym 3, and with one final deep breath pushed it open.

THWACK.

“Nice dig!”

“Free ball!”

“Cait, it's coming to you!”

The court in front of her was already electric. There were about 12 women spread out, 6 on each side all in athletic wear. The ball was just leaving the setter’s hand when Lux saw her. She was 6 feet tall at least, blue hair pulled back into a ponytail and flowing with her movement. She was wearing a red tank top and a pair of black athletic shorts, and a very clearly used set of knee and elbow pads.

She was in the middle of her running approach, leaping up towards the net as the ball soared down into a perfect set.

WHACK

Her arm swung with the boom of a cannon, and on the other end a player dived but couldn’t quite get the dig. She landed with a fist pump in the air, a big smile covering her face that revealed a noticeable but cute tooth gap. The setter, a slightly shorter woman (still far taller than Lux) with white hair walked up and slammed a high five into her, the other team members cheering with them.

Volleyball.

She had only ever played in high school, and then she hadn’t been good enough to play very often on the team. She had needed to fight tooth and claw to even be allowed to play, and as such she was forced to spend more time studying than practicing with the other girls.

But still it was her favorite sport, and the few times she had gotten to play were fantastic. Maybe it wasn’t ‘wild’ by Jinx’s standards, but still this was exciting. Just being able to see a team play made her smile. The blue haired woman finally noticed Lux, and Lux realized she was just kind of standing in the door watching them play. The woman put her hands in a T for a timeout, and as the other players relaxed, she started jogging towards Lux.

Oh gods.

“Sorry, can I help you with something?” She asked. She spoke with a noticeable accent, and her voice was smooth. Lux had to clear her throat just to try and put her scrambling brain back together. The fact that she towered over Lux did not help.

“Hi, um…” Lux fiddled in place for a moment. “Is this Sapphilite Row Area Women’s Volleyball Rec team?”

The woman smiled and gestured her head back towards the rest of the players.

“Yes, that’s right. Did you need something?”

“I was actually wondering if you were accepting new players. I tried to find it on your website but there wasn’t really much info.”

She made a confused face at that, seeming to think for a second before turning back towards the team.

“Aibhlinn, did you update the website last week like I asked you to?”

A different white-haired woman, hers much longer than the previous, with two complex looking prosthetic legs, shook her head.

“Tsk, of course she didn’t. Sorry, we're a bit behind on a few things. My name is Caitlyn by the way, I’m the captain of the team. Most people just call me Cait though.” She extended a hand towards Lux, the other pushing the hair sticking to her forehead back.

“I’m Lux, it’s nice to meet you.” She reached out to shake Cait’s hand with a smile of her own.

“So, you’re interested in joining the team?” Cait spoke, turning to walk back towards the court. Lux assumed she was supposed to follow and fell into step beside her.

“Well, I don't know if I'd be able to be like a full member, I haven’t played since high school, but the website mentioned you play with people who aren’t official members during practice, right?”

“That’s right, anyone can play with us. So, not interested in joining at all then?”

Lux put her finger to her chin for a moment.

“It’s not that I don’t want to be a full member, I just don’t think I’d be good enough to play in a setting like that. Tournaments and all. Plus, I’m still in college so I’m still trying to focus on my studies.”

Cait hummed before a stray ball rolled over to them, to which she kicked up to her hands and tossed back towards her team.

“That’s a shame.” She said as she threw it. “Our libero isn’t able to make tournaments anymore, so I was really hoping we’d be able to find a new one. Uh, sorry, that’s assuming you are a libero, right?”

Lux nodded. It was a bit embarrassing, most people assumed she was a Libero because she was short, but it was a true statement. Libero was a position that wasn’t allowed to spike, instead focusing as a defensive specialist. As such shorter players tended to be liberos, closer to the ground and able to react better, while also performing better than they would as a hitter, having to jump against players who were taller.

“I really would love to, but right now I’m just here to play the game. I don’t want to promise I can do something, and not pull through.”

“Hmm. Well, let’s not worry about that then. You’re here to play right? We can talk about that stuff later. For now, why don’t you get some stretches in and then come in on our side? Since you’re rusty I don't want you to be on the receiving end of my spikes right now. Not that Aibhlinn is gonna cut you any slack either.”

Lux shivered, suddenly feeling the weight of Aibhlinn’s eyes on her, and nodded, running off to the side of the court to get her gear on and stretch. The practice game continued while she got herself ready, and for a minute she was worried she picked the wrong rec team. They were good, really good.

Caitlyn seemed to be their lead outside hitter and was clearly captain for more than her responsible attitude. Her cut shots were incredible, her blocking was good, her reflexes were sharp. The setter on Caitlyn’s side, Lux thought she heard the name Riven, was good as well, comparing in height to Cait and having really strong control of the ball. Aibhlinn, despite having two prosthetic legs, seemed to have the strongest jump on the team, and must’ve shared some kind of rivalry with Caitlyn, as the two constantly tried to one up each other. Not to mention their middle blocker, this huge woman with a thick Shuriman accent named Kadira who seemed at least 4 inches taller than Caitlyn. And their opposite hitter, Najah, was smaller than the other players, and wore an eyepatch, but apparently that didn’t stop her serves from being deadly and cunning, switching between jump and float serves.

They were good, far better than her high school team had been, and for a moment Lux was actually terrified to walk out onto the court and play with them. She hadn’t played in a few years, hell she hadn’t exercised in a few years. Surely, she couldn’t compare to the skill that was fostered around what she assumed was going to be a simple recreational team.

After the next point and rotation, Caitlyn looked at Lux.

“You joining?”

Lux swallowed hard and nodded, jogging onto the court. Maybe Jinx was rubbing off on her, because her nervous frown turned into an excited grin.

--

“Alright everyone, I think that’s enough for tonight. Let’s cool down and clean up.”

Lux dropped her hands to her knees, huffing for air as her lungs burned from the exertion. The last few points had been brutal on her, and she barely had any time to rest when she rotated out. Still, a few years ago she could have easily made a few of the digs she missed, and easily passed far better than she had for the duration of the practice match. Well, it’s not like she expected to play extremely well, but it didn’t make her any less unhappy about the results.

Regardless of her own frustrations, as she stood up from her exhaustion suddenly a clap from her back nearly put her in the ground, an ‘oof’ escaping her lungs as Kadira laughed.

“You’re not bad, kid! You’re sturdy for how scrawny you are.”

“T-Thanks.” Lux heaved, trying her hardest not to collapse from the raw strength of the swing.

“I feel putting our new libero in the hospital is unwise. Perhaps you should refrain from breaking her, Kadira.” Aibhlinn spoke, reaching down to adjust at the complex system of blade and carbon mesh she sported from the mid-thigh down.

“She’s fine! Look, if she can take a punch from me, she can take a hit from anything, eh?”

“Alright, come on, that’s enough picking on Lux.” Caitlyn said, turning from where she was starting to take down the net. “And besides, Lux isn’t our new libero just yet, she’s just going to be practicing with us for now. Now enough chatter, we’ve got to clear out in the next 10 minutes. And remember, coach Zane is going to be with us next practice, so keep moving on your own.”

There were a few murmurs and grunts of agreement as the players began to clean up. Lux tried to help where she could, but it only took a few looks for Caitlyn to realize how beat she was, and instead she was instructed to help with some easier tasks. Eventually, everyone properly introduced themselves, and 1 by 1 they left. She wasn’t exactly sure what procedure was for new players, so she ended up waiting outside the gym for Caitlyn as she finished putting the last few pieces of equipment away.

“Ah, Lux.” Cait said, finally making her way out of the exit. “Glad you stuck around, we’ve gotta figure out what your status as a team member is.”

“Right, first of all thank you for letting me play today, even though I’m out of practice. I was wondering-”

“Hold it. Hang on. Here’s not the place to talk about this. C’mon why don’t I buy you dinner? I know a great ramen bar a few blocks away, and if you like I could give you a ride home after.”

Lux was about to do the polite, safe thing and decline, but when her stomach rumbled as she opened her mouth, she decided politeness wasn’t satisfactory right now.

“That would be great, thank you.”

“No issue. I always try to get to know all of our team members, and to be honest I just really want ramen right now.”

Lux smiled with a nod, following the much taller woman out of the gym.

--

The place Caitlyn brought them was nice, a bit quiet now that it was well past 8:30 but had a nice homey atmosphere that came with this kind of warmth. As they walked in, the older gentleman running the place gave a big smile and waved towards them.

“Heey it’s Tobias’ daughter. Been a bit, eh?”

“Far too long, good to see you too Mr. Yoshinae. This is my friend Lux, by the way. She just started practicing with the rest of the women’s rec team. Mind bringing us two house specials?”

“Right away, anything for the esteemed captain of our beloved local volleyball team.”

Caitlyn rolled her eyes with a half laugh half scoff before walking to one of the closer tables and dropping her gym bag under it with a thud. Lux followed suit, shivering from the evening cold ever so slightly.

“Oh,” Caitlyn said, upon noticing. “Don’t worry. This place should warm you up right quick.”

Lux smiled and nodded, pulling out her phone while she tried to come up with something to say. A few texts from Jinx around an hour ago she missed. Nothing important, just a stupid meme, and a mini rant about some mechanical concept Lux had no understanding on.

It didn’t take long at all for two steaming bowls of broth and noodle to be brought up for them, along with two bottles of water that were apparently ‘on the house’ according to Mr. Yoshinae. Caitlyn tried to badger him about it for a moment, but he insisted they accept his charity. Lux hated to be rude, but their friendly argument was lasting far too long, and Lux’s stomach was getting increasingly agitated by the delicious looking ramen in front of her.

Eventually he made his way back behind the bar as a couple of other patrons walked in, and Lux was finally permitted to eat. It was lucky that Jinx had recently taught Lux how to use chopsticks, as Mr. Yoshinae had not provided them with an alternative. She probably looked a bit silly, she thought, awkwardly balancing them in front of Caitlyn, who by her own visual proficiency seemed to have been using them her whole life.

It made Lux wonder about the cultural diversity here in Piltover and Zaun. At home in Demacia, things were so very… singular. There was one way to do things, one cultural zeitgeist, and one firm ethical code. But here, there were so many, even beyond what she’d experienced at the academy. She was here in an authentic Ionian restaurant, she’d had authentic Ixtali cuisine last week with Jinx, authentic Zaunite comfort food this morning at the diner. Everyone and everywhere was so authentic, and unique, and different and… and it was just so amazing. How she was ever going to return to Demacia when this was all done, she had no idea.

Not to mention, the ramen was delicious! It was just salty and savory enough to sate her preferences, juicy cuts of pork mixing with onions, a nice big egg that’s yolk mixed in to thicken the broth. Lux noticed that Caitlyn’s had come with a little dish of chili oil she mixed in as well, no doubt her status as a regular here meant Mr. Yoshinae knew her usual by heart. She’d have to take Jinx here at some point and spoil her, she knew Jinx really liked ramen as well.

“So,” Caitlyn began, pulling her from her dinnertime daydream. “About your status as a team member. If you seriously don’t want to join, you don’t have to. I’d certainly understand if you as a college student are too busy to commit. That said, I could see some real potential from you on that court tonight, and I know the rest of the girls felt it too.”

“R-Really?”

“Absolutely. I mean, brutal honesty at the forefront I can tell that you’re out of practice, so we’d have to work on your stamina, not to mention improving your technique, and probably teaching you some plays your high school team wasn’t at the level of, but yes, I really do think you’d make a good libero for our team.”

Huh. No one had ever said anything quite so encouraging to Lux before, at least regarding her athletic career. Or maybe never something so genuine. But hearing it from an accomplished, older, and clearly incredibly skilled woman was… a bit new. She didn’t hate it. She in fact felt the opposite of hate towards this.

“But I don’t want to pressure you. It’s your choice after all. If you deem your studies are more important, then you can play with us during practice, and we’ll still have a great time together.”

Lux stared down at her slowly dwindling bowl of noodles before responding.

“I’ll… have to think about it. I do want to, I mean it, I just… need some time.”

“Of course, take all the time you need. If you want to compete with us at the next tournament for our local leagues, we’ll just need to have your paperwork filled out by the end of next month, so we’ve got some time. Well, now that that’s all decided, I wanna know more about you Lux. You mentioned you’re in college, where do you go? And what for?”

“Oh, I actually study at Piltover Academy. I’m a political science major.”

“Oh, really? I’m good friends with two of the professors there actually, and I wouldn’t be surprised if they’ve taught in that field, one of them was a politician for a bit.” She mimicked putting a gun to her head and pulling a trigger after that, which Lux thought felt oddly familiar.

“Professor Talis?” Cait continued. “Jayce Talis that is. Or Professor Viktor?”

“Oh! Professor Viktor teaches my Civil Engineering course. And I think Professor Talis is usually talking to him right before class starts. Actually, talking is modest, he practically dotes on him.”

Caitlyn rolled her eyes.

“Of course he does. That gay idiot can barely contain himself when we see each other, I hate to imagine what they’re like in their workplace, let alone the safety of their own home.”

Lux actually stumbled on her next few words. She wasn’t sure why hearing someone so casually using the word ‘gay’ caught her unawares, but it did. Caitlyn didn’t seem to even register that Lux had tripped up, thankfully, as that would have likely led to a very bad misunderstanding.

“Political science has its intrigues though. Funny enough, I’m actually a detective for the Piltover Enforcers. So, I occasionally have to deal with the nonsense of political science, usually when I’m throwing some corrupt wank behind bars.” She said it again, with completely casual impudence, as if her being a detective was no big deal.

“That’s… impressive.” Lux finally managed when her tongue stopped flailing at her own words. “I guess you don’t meet someone at your local gym and expect them to be a detective. That’s pretty amazing.”

“It really isn’t.” Caitlyn said, her eyes suddenly looking downtrodden. “I picked it because an old friend told me that protecting people was important. Helping people, right? But, if you want someone who helps people you should talk to Aibhlinn, she’s a mechanical engineer, and a cohort of Viktor. The two of them have pioneered medical prosthesis to cater towards a variety of fields, athletic, academic, manual labor, it’s really amazing stuff. Or Kadira, she’s a construction worker. Literally builds the houses people need to live, not to mention she does charity work in her free time. People like them are doing much more to help the world than I am.”

Lux wasn’t really sure how to reply to that. She’d heard a bit from Jinx about the Piltover Enforcers, and the problems associated, but she certainly wasn’t knowledgeable enough to have some complex opinion on the matter. But Jinx was a good person, and in the brief time she’d met Caitlyn, she was a good person, and if they both shared similar feelings towards the matter, then clearly something was in the air.

“Sorry, got off track again.” Caitlyn said. “I feel like I’m talking more about me than we are about you. So, why did-” Just then a phone ringtone started, ringing from the gym bag below Caitlyn’s chair. She rolled her eyes and held a finger up, reaching down to grab her phone. “Ah, sorry, it’s my girlfriend. I have to take this. Hello? Hi love, what- Yes hold on- hold on-”

Lux was still somewhat floored by the fact that ‘girlfriend’ had just left Caitlyn’s mouth. It made her feel this kind of warm inside she couldn’t explain. Not only was she making a new friend who shared her love for volleyball, but this friend was also a gay woman. Which Lux was too. They were both gay women. With girlfriends. Well, no that wasn’t right, Lux didn’t have a girlfriend, but she had someone she wanted to be her girlfriend, so it should count. She was so distracted by the world girlfriend; she had stopped listening to Caitlyn’s end of the conversation. Suddenly her tone increased, and Lux was ripped from her thought spiral.

“She did what? You’re kidding me. How can- Ugh… Yes, I’ll pick up the parts she needs. Tell her next time she breaks it to use her own damn gas money though. Right… right… fine. Okay. I love you too. See you in a minute.”

Caitlyn’s somewhat perfect posture she’d had for most of the evening suddenly collapsed, and she slumped back in her chair. Again, eerily familiar.

“Sorry,” Cait began. “I know I promised you a ride home, but I have to go to my girlfriend’s house asap. Her little sister has apparently broken their heater, and now I have to go to the hardware store to bring home the replacement parts. Lucky me.”

“Oh, no it’s okay, I’ll just take the bus. Good luck with that though, sounds like she’s a riot.”

“You don’t know the half of it. I swear to the gods, she’s like a chaos-inducing problem-attracting monkey.”

Lux couldn’t help but giggle at her words.

“I know someone exactly like that.”

--

That night, Lux had already been asleep for several hours when her laptop blinked to life on her desk with an email.

//From: [email protected]//
//Subject: Your Attendance at Kindred’s Eve Harvest Festival Gala//

Chapter Text

-Jinx-

--

“How the hell did you even manage this, Powder?”

“Could you stop complaining? You’re the one who told me to give it a look.”

“Yeah, I told you to give it a look, not give it an overhaul.”

Jinx rolled her eyes as she twisted the wrench against the screws of the heater, mumbling under her breath about the quality of the thing, because obviously it couldn’t have been her fault it broke. The vent she had worked off clicked back into place finally, and she wiped sweat from her forehead standing up.

“Ok, I just need the valve for the evaporator coil, the screws for the fan, and the filters for the air cleaner and it’s all fixed. How long till officer bitch gets home?”

Vi sighed and shook her head, leaning against the wall in their cellar.

“I don’t know, she said she was at dinner with some girl on her volleyball team. And please stop calling her that.”

“Why? It fits her perfectly. She’s a cop, and she’s a bitch. Officer – Bitch. Seems apt.”

“Powder, can we not do this right now? You don’t like her, I’m aware. You don’t need to remind me every day.”

Jinx opened her mouth to continue, but as she turned her head to Vi, she froze. Her eyebags had come back recently, and her posture had dropped a bit. A few years ago, even if she was sleep deprived and exhausted, Vi probably could have beat the shit out of anybody on the damn continent. But as she got older, even just by a few years, things were starting to visually affect her. Guilt wrapped around Jinx’s heart when she thought about the fact that just about all of Vi’s stress problems were because of her.

She turned back to the heater and squatted down, avoiding looking at Vi’s tired eyes.

“Sorry.” She mumbled.

There were a long few moments of silence before Vi spoke.

“It’s okay. I’m not exactly pleased about the fact that she’s a cop either, trust me. I just… Maybe it’s stupid to think about this but I’d like to imagine that in the future you two could be in the same room as each other without snapping for the other’s neck. I mean… she’s gonna be my wife eventually Pow-Pow. You know that right?”

She knew very well, and it was very frustrating. That wasn’t a fair request though, was it? Asking Jinx to treat the woman who replaced her as Vi’s priority with a modicum of respect. But… Jinx wasn’t very fair about the situation either. At the end of the day, she supposed nothing was really fair. If anything was actually fair, Jinx wouldn’t be Jinx, their family would be here, Lux would be a photographer, etc etc etc.

Apparently, she had taken too long, and Vi decided to speak.

“She’s really trying. And I’m not bullshitting you here. We talked about it, and she’s legitimately trying to make things better. Not just because I asked her to either, she doesn’t like to fight with you.”

A moment from not all that long flashed back to Jinx. Caitlyn making her coffee, and without asking giving her 5 spoons of sugar.

But just because you knew how someone liked coffee didn’t mean anything. Before she could say anything else they both heard the door upside creak open.

“Vi? Jinx? I got the parts.”

Speak of the devil.

Vi gave her one last silent plea with her eyes before leaning over towards the stairs.

“We’re downstairs baby.”

Jinx wanted to vomit.

The wooden stairs creaked as Caitlyn walked down into the basement, a paper bag in her hand. She gave Jinx that awkward half smile she always did, and then held out the bag towards her as Vi got up from her leaning perch against the wall.

“Everything’s right here.”

An urge to say plenty of things came to mind, but as she watched Vi slip her arm around Caitlyn’s waist, she rolled her eyes. She supposed, maybe this once, she could try not to fight.

“Thanks.” She spoke, half heartedly taking the bag and turning back to the heater. “Alright, Vi can you hold the flashlight while I get these in?”

“Oh uh, y’know I just remembered that Kuro needs to be fed, doesn’t he? I gotta go do that so here, Cait can you hold the flashlight for Jinx?”

Oh, come the fuck on. Caitlyn did not look all too pleased either but took the flashlight with a sigh. Vi gave them a thumbs up before she went up the stairs, boots thudding hard. And suddenly, she was alone with Caitlyn. They looked at each other for a few moments before Caitlyn walked over.

“Alright, where do you need the light?”

The urge to say “Up your ass” was sooo strong. But Jinx resisted nonetheless.

“Here just, over my shoulder, I gotta put this panel in first. Hold it stable.”

Caitlyn did as ordered, and Jinx began to work off the old and broken filter that she totally hadn’t broken nope what are you talking about? She worked in silence for a while, only occasionally requesting the light somewhere else as she worked. The first time the light faltered ever so slightly, Jinx did not say anything. Nor the second, nor the third. Fourth time? it became a problem.

“Would you stop swinging the light like that? I need it to be stable. Sta-ble. Y’know opposite of you and my sister right now?”

Caitlyn scoffed.

“Oh shut it. And forgive me if my wrists are a little uncooperative, I just came from volleyball practice to- oh what was it again? Yes, that’s right to fix your mess.”

“Blah blah whatever, not my fault this house is a piece of junk.”

“This house happens to be one of the nicer houses in Zaun that the three of us can afford.”

“And you don’t see the problem with that Miss Piltie?”

Silence from that one. The light did straighten out, Jinx had to admit. Eventually Caitlyn spoke up.

“I’m sorry. I’m not blind to the issues here Jinx. You know I wish things weren’t like this.”

“Oh that’s rich. You’re a cop. You’re literally part of the fucking problem here.”

Another moment of silence.

“I know.”

Jinx froze in her spot. She turned in her squat to look at Caitlyn.

“What?”

Caitlyn’s eyes were down at the floor, refusing to look at Jinx.

“I know I’m part of the problem. I didn’t know that when I became a detective but meeting you and your sister opened my eyes to that. It took… time but, I understand. I… haven’t told your sister this yet but I’m looking for a new job.”

Jinx practically dropped her wrench at that one. Caitlyn continued before she could reply.

“The problem is, I make a lot of money as a detective, and I already budget significantly to pay for this house. If I just leave now without having a net, I’m not going to be able to support your sister anymore. Or you, for that matter. Until I find a job that can match my wages, I have to continue to be a detective. And that’s difficult, considering most people look at me and see the disgraced Kiramman, not my skills.”

What… the fuck? Caitlyn Kiramman, bull headed Caitlyn, officer bitch, hat lady, the fucking Caitlyn Kiramman, was admitting a mistake to Jinx?

“Oh.” Was all she managed to answer. Caitlyn laughed.

“Oh indeed. Funny, I was just talking about this to a new friend of mine on the volleyball team, and now to you. Maybe I should just bite the bullet and tell Vi already.”

“Why hesitate? She doesn’t like that you’re a cop anymore than I do.”

Caitlyn didn’t answer for a while, her eyes flitting between some spot on the wall and the heater. She opened her mouth for a moment, and then closed it again. Finally she managed to speak, so low it was almost a whisper, as if from upstairs Vi would be able to hear them.

“I’ve always been the one with a steady job you know. You remember the way Vi hopped from thing to thing once you two moved in together. Even now with her fighting, she makes money sure but it’s not consistent and it’s not stable. But I do. I have a salary, I have good credit, I’m able to support her. If I tell her that might be changing… I’m afraid of what she might do. I’m afraid she’s gonna do something stupid and get hurt.”

Jinx swallowed for a second and addressed the elephant in the room.

“You’re afraid she’s gonna start bounty hunting again.”

Cait flinched but nodded.

It was a pretty legitimate fear. Jinx remembered the nights Vi would come home bloody and beaten when things first started, even more than she already did fighting for cash. More specifically, she remembered the day the enforces found Vi half dead, and Caitlyn called Jinx sobbing to come to the hospital. Now that Caitlyn mentioned it, that was a pretty fucking valid reason not to tell Vi.

But then again Jinx thought about the day Lux had turned her into a fucking piece of art. She could have hid and ran away like she always did, but instead she told Lux about her pain and her fear, and Lux accepted her, wanted to help her. That feeling was… gods it was fantastic.

“I… think you should tell her.”

Caitlyn grimaced for a long moment but nodded.

“Can’t believe I’m taking advice from you.”

“Well, I can’t believe I’m giving it to you. Maybe you should spend less time eating with your volleyball bimbo and more time dealing with that shit. I don’t know.”

“Ugh. I’ll have you know that the girl I was having dinner with was very intelligent and was not a bimbo. In fact, she goes to your university, and she seemed very responsible. Before you take to lecturing me, maybe I should introduce you to her and you can learn a thing or two about your own maturity.”

Jinx rolled her eyes as she turned back to the heater.

“Yeah right. I don’t need to meet her to know her and I would not get along.”

--

Jinx and Lux were getting along very well. If you could consider sex two or three times a week getting along, which Jinx very much did. The semester was chugging along, Jinx was actually excelling in one of her classes for the first time in who knows when thanks to Lux, and as she sat in Professor Viktor’s class, she was finding herself a little less bored than normal.

Was she distracted? Obviously. Lux was sitting next to her in one of those flowy blouse tops she wore, and Jinx was finding it very difficult not to look at her shoulders, and her hair, and her legs, and yeah pretty much everything. Every now and then Lux would notice, blush, and give this weak little smile that made Jinx want to drag her out of class and to the bathrooms. Fuck she was down bad.

Class ended, and as she was just starting to talk to Lux, the Professor held his hand up.

“Miss Jinx, a word?”

She frowned slightly and looked at Lux.

“I’ll wait outside.” Lux said with a wink that mixed poorly with the pit of anxiety already forming in her stomach. She nodded back and took a deep breath and walked up to the front desk. Surely, she hadn’t done anything wrong. Right? And why was she nervous about that fact anyway, she’d pissed tons of teachers in this building off and rarely cared when they took issue with her. It probably had something to do with her new partnership. If she was penalized, Lux would also kind of be penalized, and she fucking hated that idea immediately.

“Sooo… teach. Wassup?” Jinx prayed her tone seemed friendly and not belligerent.

“Well, Miss Jinx, I want to actually talk to you about an opportunity that recently opened on campus.”

For the first time in a while, Jinx was legitimately surprised. Viktor continued.

“There’s going to be a symposium held over fall break here at the campus, part of the council’s initiative for STEM fields here at the academy to connect with other academic programs, scholars, and scientists around the world. It happens along with the Kindred’s Eve Harvest Festival Gala, also here at the campus. You’re familiar?”

Jinx furrowed her brow and nodded.

“Well, you see the campus has been asked to select some of our brightest students from each STEM track to present some kind of achievement, presentation, anything to showcase the work our campus is doing to cultivate the next generation of scientists and mathematicians in the world.”

“So, it’s like a big science fair? Like elementary school shit?”

Viktor laughed and gestured with his hand.

“You’re not that far off. But it’s eh… more professional than that. As the head of biomechanics here at the academy, I’ve been asked to select two students to represent engineering and biology at the event.”

Wait…

What?

“Why are you telling me this?” Jinx asked. Viktor smiled.

“Well, Miss Jinx, I’ve selected you to represent the engineering department.”

…

“You’re joking right?”

Another smile. “Not at all.”

“But… W-What?”

Viktor stood up from his chair and limped from his cane to rest against the desk on Jinx’s side.

“Well, you are one of 5 students who qualified for the young inventor’s scholarship. And from what other professors have told me, your knowledge of mechanical interface regarding automobiles and pyrotechnics, and your surprising grasp on chemistry, is astounding. I think you’d be the perfect fit.”

Jinx was too stunned to speak. For a long few moments, she just stood there, eyes flickering around the room avoiding Viktor.

“B-But I mean… I’m just a street punk. I only even go here because of that scholarship I mean I’m not some academic. I only know about cars because I spent my life stealing them and I only know about chemistry because…” She elected not to inform her teacher about her upbringing around a drug kingpin and her own regular usage of ‘chemicals’.

“Jinx,” Viktor said, this air of sincerity. “I know how you feel. Trust me, when Dean Heimerdinger asked me to work here, I had similar thoughts to you. I don’t belong here, I’m a crippled Zaunite, they want other people. But regardless of your past, you are a truly brilliant young woman with great things ahead of you. I don’t want to pressure you to accept, it’s your choice after all, but this would be a great opportunity to get your name out there, and perhaps even a good way to get some pressure off your back from the stunt you pulled last year.”

Jinx grimaced as she thought about her failed mural.

“You know about that huh?”

“It was kind of hard not to when it happened, everyone was in a panic over it, and eh… well some of our staff have a tendency to gossip. Your name occasionally comes up more often than not.”

That wasn’t exactly surprising. But still what? What the fuck would she even do? She was a junkie with a death wish, she wasn’t meant to be in the limelight like that. Not to mention…

“Does it cost anything?” She asked. Can’t even consider going if she couldn’t afford it. Viktor shook his head.

“Not at all, in fact your ticket will be provided by the academy, and all of the food and drinks will be available to you.”

That got Jinx’s attention.

“Drinks?”

Viktor laughed. “Yes, at the gala there’s going to be food and alcohol present, however the academy has asked me to inform my selections that you must be on your best behavior for the event.”

Now… now this was tempting. Behavior smavior, free drinks and fancy food? Now it was worth considering. But… even then the fuck was she supposed to do? She could give a demonstration on car mechanics or… maybe like a joint thing with chemistry and mechanics on firearms and pyrotechnics? Hmm…

“Can I have time to consider it?” Jinx asked.

“Of course, we have until autumn break to submit our selections, so you have eh… about two weeks to make your choice.”

Jinx gave a hmm and looked up again.

“I mean, yeah, I’ll consider it. Uh… thanks teach. I’m still kind of floored you would ask me of all people. I think I’ve got like a 2 gpa? And you want me to represent the school? Like… fuck.”

“Of course, I truly believe you deserve this, miss Jinx. Grades are just numbers; intelligence goes far beyond that. Some people in Academia could do well to remember that. But I’ll let you go, I’m sure you and Miss Crownguard have somewhere to be?” He said it with a bit of a knowing look, and Jinx had to clear her throat.

“Uh, yeah, I guess. Later teach.”

Viktor gave a wave in lieu of a goodbye, and Jinx left the classroom. Lux was waiting there, like she said she would, just as pretty as she was minutes ago.

“So what did Professor Viktor want?” She asked, immediately falling into step besides Jinx as they walked through the building. Lux had her later classes, but they had recently started walking to the other building together after Viktor’s class, and then Jinx would leave from there. She had some excuse about how it was faster to go from that building to the parking lot, but both of them kinda knew it was bullshit. It was nice though, walking together. Not that she’d ever admit it.

“Oh uh, nothing. Just some stuff about an extra curricular opportunity. I doubt I’ll do it, it sounds interesting but I’m just not the kind of person y’know?”

“Really? You’re the last person I would’ve expected he’d ask for if that’s what he needed. No offense.”

“Right? And none taken, you're absolutely correct. It’s weird. I don’t know, it kind of sounds like a hassle.”

“Hm. Hey on the subject.” Lux said as they went down the stairs and out into the campus air. “I had something I wanted to ask you about as well.”

“What’s up?”

“Well, I got an email from my father the other night.” She rolled her eyes. “And there’s this thing going on during the end of autumn break. It’s uh, the Kindred’s Eve Harvest Festival Gala, some big fancy dance that goes on here where a bunch of rich politicians and famous people attend, or something. I basically got told that I would have to attend and represent the Crownguard family there so… I was wondering if you maybe wanted to be my plus one?”

Jinx stopped in her tracks, causing Lux to turn and look at her. Lux swallowed and reached a hand up to play with her hair, something Jinx recently learned was a nervous tick.

“Y-You don’t have to if you won’t want to and like, I get it it’s for rich people and you’re not really into those kind of things but like I don’t want to bring Ezreal and I think it would be really fun and maybe we could dance but I know it’s probably stupid and-”

“H-Hold up. Stop for a second.”

Lux did and Jinx took a moment to compose herself. Lux. Luxanna Crownguard. THE Luxanna Crownguard was asking her to go to the dance she’d just been given an opportunity to go to. This… this was different from the other times they’d spent together. Those were informal and friendly but this. This was a date. She was asking Jinx on a proper date. Oh. Oh…

“Jinx?”

Do or die time.

“Funny story.” She began, trying to fight the dry feeling in her throat. “So. That’s the thing professor Viktor asked me about.”

“What?”

“Yeah uh, he asked me to represent the engineering department and give a presentation on my work in mechanics. For an academic symposium held with the gala. So… yeah. Yeah, I want to go with you.”

A big smile ran across Lux’s face that quickly turned into a laugh as she threw her arms around Jinx into a hug. Oh. Oh…

“Jinx, that's amazing!” She said, still clung around Jinx. “That’s so cool you’re being recognized like that, and it makes things even easier for me.”

Jinx was smiling too, like a big fucking idiot as she wrapped her arms around Lux as well. “Easier how?” She said through her smile.

“I was worried people might talk if I brought a plus one that was a girl, but if you’re gonna be there anyway people won’t be suspicious of us.”

Jinx’s smile dropped. She pulled back a bit to look at Lux.

“What?”

Lux’s smile dropped a bit as well, but it was still there.

“Well, you know if you were only there because of me, people would assume we were… involved. And if that was the case it would get back to my parents and I’d have to explain you were only there as my friend. But this way, we can spend time together and no one will think we’re dating. It’s great.”

…

…

…

“Y-Yeah. That’s great.” Jinx choked out, smiling again. It returned Lux’s smile to her face, and she pulled her back into the hug.

“Alright. I’ve gotta get to class before I’m late, let’s go.” Lux said.

The rest of their walk Lux excitedly talked about how fun it was going to be. She didn’t seem to notice Jinx didn’t reply once. When she finally made it back to her truck, Jinx let her head fall to the steering wheel with a painfully satisfying thud.

It wasn’t a date. It never was.

They were friends. Friends with benefits. But that was obvious. That’s how it was always going to be. She was well aware that Lux was using her to explore her newfound sexuality. After all, Jinx was fucking perfect for that, right? Lux could start fucking girls and still get dick, and maybe even have an excuse if her parents ever found out. She could fucking picture it now, the moment Lux’s family found out and Lux would be like “Wait she has a cock so I’m not really gay.”

And how different would that be from “Look she’s not my date she just happened to be there and she’s my friend.” It was never going to be a date, just an excuse.

Was that all Jinx was to Lux? Was she an excuse? An experiment? A plaything you had fun with and then when it became inconvenient for you, you threw it away?

…

No… no these weren’t good thoughts. She was being ridiculous. Lux’s family was fucked up, and if they caught on to what Lux was doing, they’d probably force her to come home. Yeah… yeah that’s right. It’s not like she was ashamed of Jinx… no no no it was necessary, she wouldn’t leave Jinx like that, she wouldn’t. She…

When she finally got home, she lied to Lux that her stomach wasn’t feeling good to cancel their meeting for the day, and then shot up.

--

She wrote Professor Viktor an email the next day that she’d accepted and would be attending the symposium and gala. He seemed enthused and replied back that when she figured out what her presentation would be on to inform him, so they could add it to the itinerary. Jinx was going to be on an itinerary. Yuck.

She still had no clue what to fucking do though, though she supposed she did have two weeks to figure it out. Probably something easy, she wasn’t really going for the prestige after all, she just wanted to drink champagne and dance with Lux. Not that it was even a fucking option though, Lux would probably claim that was too gay for public.

No… bad thoughts. Ignore it, Lux wouldn’t treat her like that. The night before, the voices had tried to convince her that her assumptions were true and she’d done her absolute best to refuse them any purchase in her mind. But… the thoughts were still there, she had to admit that at least. It would probably be fine; she’d just suck it up and have fun. And besides none of this really mattered. Her original assertion was still true, and by letting herself be even slightly worried about it, she was falling into a trap.

Romance wasn’t real. Thinking romance was real only made it hurt more when it wasn’t. How many times would she fucking have to remind herself of this before she got it into her thick head.

It had never been a damn problem before, only with Lux was this an issue. She was just so… so fucking perfect. It wasn’t fair, Jinx couldn’t hold a flag to her and now they had been fucking for almost a month.

She digressed, her thoughts were getting far too uncontrolled, and she needed a break. Time to tell Vi about the symposium.

When she walked down the stairs Vi was sitting on the couch, watching hockey. Her left eye was pretty fucked up again, something Jinx had benevolently helped her with two nights ago when she got it. It did worry Jinx a bit that Vi got so injured fighting, but it was their main source of income so what were they supposed to do?

Regardless, Vi noticed her and turned with a smile.

“Hey kiddo. Sleep well?”

No.

“Yeah.” She said, pushing the unbraided hair from her forehead. She took a seat on the same couch, a cushion between them, and for a while just watched the game with Vi.

It was kind of embarrassing, but Jinx really enjoyed watching sports. A habit she picked up from Vi no doubt, but it was still something that made her smile. Hockey was a personal favorite of theirs, Vi had played hockey in high school before she got arrested but even before that Vander had instilled a love for the game (and others) in them.

The Entresol Gutter-Rats were playing the Basilich Basilisks, and they weren’t doing well. 1-5, but honestly that wasn’t surprising. A Zaunite hockey team hadn’t done well since Vander made all three of them watch the Runeterra cup when Jinx was 10. Not that she really watched after that, Dad always thought sports were boorish, and so like a daughter who wanted nothing more than to make daddy proud, she also decided sports were dumb.

Her and Vi had always tried to make time for it though, it was one of the few hobbies/pastimes they both shared and legitimately enjoyed. Vi even managed to score free tickets to home games that Cait got by being a detective and going to them was always so much fun. They would also get pretzel knots with spicy mustard and milkshakes, cheering for the fights and waving their arms for free t-shirts. Gods she was happy her sister was in her life.

“Just wanna watch the game? You hardly hang out with me down here nowadays.” Vi said.

Surely, she could trust Vi with this. If anyone, her sister who had saved her 1000 times over could be someone to rely on. Her and Lux had relented to hiding it but… Vi would be okay. Right?

“I uh, actually had something to tell you. Two things.”

Vi raised an eyebrow and muted the TV with the remote, turning to face Jinx. She took another deep breath and relented.

“So, um… First thing. There’s this, thing, going on at the Academy over break. It’s like a mix of some fancy ass rich gala and a symposium for science nerds across the globe, right?”

Vi nodded.

“Well it’s- it’s kinda hard to believe but one of my professors, (Viktor, y’know the one who’s dating Caitlyn’s dumb semi-brother?) actually uhm… asked me to represent the Academy’s engineering department with a presentation of my work.”

The look on Vi’s face went very quickly between several different emotions. First shock, then disbelief, then confusion, then a big pure smile, juxtaposed by the big purple bruise on her eye.

“Holy shit! Powder, that’s incredible! You’re going to be giving a presentation, and you specifically were chosen to represent it? Oh my gods that’s so awesome!”

Before Jinx could protest Vi had her in one of those all-encompassing buff sister hugs, the ones that honestly made Jinx think about dropping the name Jinx all together and becoming powder again. Not that it was even possible but, still. She’d already changed her name twice, what would a third time be?

Vi was laughing, and she was laughing too, until strong hands on her shoulders separated them.

“S-So like what are you gonna do? Your work… like cars and stuff?”

“I don’t know yet. I thought maybe, but is car work really worth being at some kind of world-renowned science fair?”

Vi thought on it for a second and shrugged, giving no time before she gave another buff sister hug.

“My little sis is gonna be in some big rich science show! This is so amazing Powder, Gods I’m so proud of you.”

Oh uh. Not proud of you. That was easy instant waterworks, and she had to choke them back so she could continue talking.

“That’s uh, not the only thing, remember.”

Vi gasped as if it was some grand revelation she forgot about, and backed away, eyes intent and listening.

“So… Well it’s not… Gods fuck this… I’m also kind of going with someone. A girl. Kind of.” Jinx had to force the thoughts about how it’s not technically a date away. At the very least she could pretend it was, and maybe if she told Vi it is, somehow the universe will be grateful, and it would magically become a date.

“You have a date?!” Vi cried. Jinx nodded sheepishly. Vi looked as if she’d seen the rapture. “Dude you’ve never gone on a date before, I mean not that you’d told me. Is it someone I know?”

Jinx shook her head.

“Is this like a first date or have you been seeing them before this?”

Wasn’t that a fucking question.

“Uh… It’s kinda complicated. It’s like… I guess yeah technically you could maybe consider it a first date but we’ve been… uh…” What was the word Lux used? “Involved, for just about a month now. Her name is Lux.”

Still in utter disbelief, Vi stepped back and sat again on the couch.

“Why didn’t you tell me?” It wasn’t accusatory, just legitimately curious.

“Honestly, I didn’t know how. We uh… I didn’t think it was gonna be a long-term thing, I kinda figured it would be a one-night stand. But then we just… kept… you know.”

Vi nodded in understanding, a big smile still across her face.

“I mean yeah dude, that’s so cool. I’m happy for you Pow-Pow, you deserve someone. Do you have a picture of her? If you don’t mind.”

She smiled at Vi, her damn incessant sincerity was always so disarming. Jinx pulled her phone out and scrolled to a selfie that her and Lux had taken at Sumpsnipe Bite, tossing the phone to her. Unlike Lux, Vi caught it easily, and looked at the photo for a few moments.

“Damn, she’s not bad. I always knew my lil sis had some game.”

Jinx had to bite her lip to stop herself from retorting that she had probably slept with more people than Vi had. No that would only lead to more questions, and she really didn’t want to drop the bomb that Jinx was kind of loose when high. Actually, she was always loose, but hey that wasn’t a bad thing. Well… according to her clinical advisor that was “unhealthy coping” but fuck him.

Vi beat her to the punch of talking again.

“So what are you going to wear?”

…

Oh.

She hadn’t even thought of that.

What would she wear? She wasn’t exactly known for her formal assortment of outfits. She could break formal code and just wear whatever the fuck she wanted but, if Lux gave her the chance to dance, she wouldn’t want to ruin Lux’s night.

“I don’t know.” She answered. Vi hummed, and then put a hand on Jinx’s shoulder.

“Well, I guess you’ve got no choice sis. You and I are going clothing shopping for your date.”

“What? Why? No way, how would we even afford new clothes like that!”

“Relax. I know a place, and I know a guy. Just gotta trust your big sis here on this one. Now since you don’t have an outfit, we want to get something to compliment Lux. Can you get her to send a picture of what she’s wearing?”

Part of her still wanted to fight Vi on it but she supposed it couldn’t be all bad. With a sigh Jinx pulled her phone out and texted Lux.

//Jinx: Hey, what are you wearing to the gala? //

//Lux: Probably one of my nice dresses. Why? //

God, this was embarrassing.

//Jinx: Can you send me a pic of the dress? //

…
…
…

//Lux: Uhm why do you want one? //

Oh fucking Gods damnit. She couldn’t say “So I can get clothes to match you”. Well, she could, but the idea of showing up in the matching clothes as a surprise was too good. She swallowed hard and replied.

//Jinx: Because I want to see you in it. //

Fuck that was such a stupid reply. Fuck she was so bad at this. That was totally fucking creepy, and the radio silence after only confirmed that. Vi simply watched as Jinx paced in place for a good 10 minutes before her phone suddenly pinged.

It was a picture of Lux, but not the Lux she knew. The Lux she knew was beautiful but always kind of… cute? She wore pink skirts, and sweaters, and blouses, things that had an air of traditional modest yet modern attraction to them.

This Lux was wearing a gorgeous navy-blue gown, with white accents here and there. It fit her body tight, generous with her curves in a way Jinx knew only she had seen the real extent of. At the side of her chest was a brooch, with what she guessed was some kind of family crest. The gown was sleeveless, and Lux wore long white gloves that went up to her elbows.

This Lux was mature. Sexy. Powerful. A gorgeous gem that shined with her gilded hair and her oceanic eyes. Her expression was shy, and there was a bit of red embarrassment in her cheeks.

“Fuck.” She exhaled, and Vi leaned over to look.

“Damn girl. Are you dating a princess or something?”

Funny.

//Lux: Soo… do you like it? //

Oh gods above.

//Jinx: Yeah. A lot. Damn. //

//Lux: I’m glad you like it. //

//Lux: If you wanted… in a bit I could send you more pictures. //

//Lux: Without the dress… //

She snapped her phone away before Vi could see the messages. Curse this vile wonderful woman, and curse Jinx for turning this poor innocent virgin into a full-blown pervert.

//Jinx: Gods please. Later though. I got shit to do. //

She turned her phone to silent and stuffed it in her pockets, turning to Vi who was wearing the biggest shit eating grin on earth.

“What?” Jinx demanded.

“Oh, nothing. You’re just looking a little red.”

Fucking… Gods damn everything.

“Sorry, big sis rules say I’m obligated to tease you about your new girlfriend. Alright, deep navy blue and white, we can work with that. I’ve got one question, suit or dress?”

She considered her options, mind thinking back to Lux’s concerns being seen intimately with another woman.

“Suit. I’ll take a page out of your playbook.”

Vi grinned. “Atta girl. Get in my car pow-pow, we’re about to turn you into a Lux attracting soft butch.”

Jinx grinned too. Maybe this wasn’t such a bad idea.

Chapter Text

-Lux-

--

While Saturday mornings had become a habit for Lux, sometimes habits break. It wasn’t the beep of her piercing alarm that woke her up, nor did she hear Jinx complaining for her to turn it off. Instead she felt herself roused awake as the sheets and blankets of her bed rustled and shifted, and a very comforting warmth and weight that she enjoyed being behind her was moving.

It was fully off the bed now, and Lux gave a little inaudible groan of protest as her source of cuddling left. Her eyes fluttered open and the hazy dim light of just before sunrise seeped into the room. She rubbed her eyes and pushed up, looking around and spotting Jinx mid donning her clothes.

“Jinx?” She asked, voice groggy and low.

Her partner turned to her and gave a very weak sheepish smile.

“Morning sunshine. Sorry to wake you.”

Her voice sounded hoarse, and there was the slightest warble in it.

“N-No it’s okay. What are you doing up? My alarm didn’t go off yet.”

Jinx grimaced as she finished buckling her belt and raised an arm back to rub the back of her neck.

“Uh… yeah… I couldn’t sleep so y’know. I just need a smoke, okay? I’ll be back.”

Lux mumbled an affirmative before she laid back down and closed her eyes. There was probably no going back to sleep for her now that she was awake, so she should probably get up and…

…

The second time Lux woke up that morning was when someone outside of her hall screamed something she couldn’t make out, and then a group of people passed by being just as loud. Inconsiderate assholes. Some people are trying to sleep, it’s Saturday after all.

She was about to groan her complaints to Jinx, when she turned over and realized Jinx still wasn’t next to her in bed. That was concerning… She sat up and reached over to grab her phone to check the time. Only 6:11 What time was it when Jinx left? Sleep had taken her before she’d gotten the chance to even check. It was probably okay though, wasn’t it? Surely it hadn’t been that long since Jinx left the room, after all the sun was still dim in the window. Everything was perfectly fine.

…

She decided she should check on Jinx. It wasn’t that she was unreasonably worried about her, or that she was afraid Jinx was doing something reckless, or that she maybe thought Jinx was upset at her…

Okay all of those things were true.

She put on her own clothes, Jinx’s canvas colored hoodie she wore so often and a pair of leggings, due to the chill, grabbed her keys, and walked out of her dorm. The first problem to solve (and hopefully the only problem) was where Jinx actually was. You weren’t allowed to smoke in-building, and Lux had made Jinx promise she wouldn’t since officially she was considered Lux’s guest inside the dorms, but then again you weren’t technically allowed to smoke anywhere on campus. Not that Jinx listened to that rule in the first place. Hopefully she was right outside and there would be no issue.

A quick ride down the elevator with an awkward ‘morning’ to the janitor, Lux was outside. It was colder than she’d anticipated, which made sense for it being the later middle end of autumn. She shivered as a breeze ran past her and looked around. No Jinx.

Alright, if she wasn’t directly outside then where would she be? Maybe she’d already taken off? Surely she would’ve said something though, or sent a text. She never left without saying goodbye. There weren’t many places on campus that Jinx liked to hang around. The dining hall wouldn’t be open yet, nor would any of the labs and workshops within the science building. Lux thought she had heard a rumor that the people who used drugs on campus usually did so at the dumpster behind the athletics department, but that was on the entire other side of campus.

But… maybe Jinx wanted more than a smoke. She would be lying if she claimed the thought of Jinx shooting up didn’t bother her. It really did as a matter of fact, so did the cigarettes. The weed not so much, but that was only because Jinx had practically given her a slideshow on why cannabis was not as bad as the media portrayed it to be, and she even had scholarly articles from chemical research across Runeterra to back it up.

That didn’t change the shimmer and cigarette problem though. Lux knew it wasn’t like Jinx was actively choosing it, she was an addict. Lux hadn’t ever really met an addict before Jinx though, and how you were supposed to help them was beyond her. So realistically, all she could do was let her do what she wanted, which left an ugly feeling in her stomach, but she didn’t have control over it. Which she also hated.

Still, walking all the way to the athletics department for shimmer? Jinx would much rather just drive home and do it.

Drive home…

Lux snapped to no one and exclaimed at her own detective skills before taking off for the parking lot.

--

It was generally pretty empty on Saturday mornings, as this was visitor parking only. The residents of the dorms had a separate parking lot, as did the on campus apartments, so not many people were visiting. It made spotting Jinx’s truck easy, and even easier was spotting Jinx.

She was at her truck, just as Lux had deduced, only she wasn’t inside the truck itself, she was sitting inside the bed. From this distance away Lux couldn’t tell if the steam rising from her was cigarette smoke or just her breath on the freezing morning air, but she suspected it was both. Jinx was facing away from her, and didn’t notice her approach until the clicking of Lux’s shoes was audible.

She turned and spotted Lux in a moment, a roll of her favorite, Zaunite Specials, hanging from her lips.

“Flashlight?” She mumbled, before taking the cigarette from her lips as Lux got closer. “What are you doing here?”

“I feel like I could ask you the same.” Lux said, no malice in her tone. Jinx just hummed in response before reaching over and pushing down the tailgate.

Lux took the invitation and climbed up with a hand from Jinx, choosing to sit next to Jinx so their shoulders were touching, rather than on the other side of the truck. Jinx… didn’t look amazing. Her eyes were bright red and puffy, and pretty clearly not from drugs. She sniffled for a moment and ran her tattooed arm over her face after Lux sat down, clearing her throat a moment later. The bags under her eyes were heavy, the veins around her eyes dark and visible. She was wearing that big heavy leather jacket with the fur lining, with just a tank top beneath and a pair of those shorts that showed off her legs. How she wasn’t freezing, Lux could never tell, but sometimes it just felt like Jinx was immune to the cold. Maybe it had something to do with the amount of shimmer she’d endured, Lux thought she remembered that too much can potentially alter physiology ever so slightly, and honestly Jinx had probably been exposed to more shimmer and survived than most people living today. It broke Lux’s heart to think about.

“When I woke up without you next to me, I was afraid you left without saying anything.” Lux said, scooching just a bit closer. Jinx sniffled again and cleared her throat a second time before speaking.

“Nah, not this time. Um… if I ever do that though… sorry. I just don’t make good choices. A lot. Ever.”

“Hey c’mon, you make some good choices. Or are you saying I’m a bad choice?” Lux chided.

That pulled a chuckle from Jinx as she took another inhale of her smoke and blew it away from Lux.

“Of course not, and that’s not what I meant at all. It’s uh, I’m not always in a good state of mind so sometimes I just do shit that doesn’t make sense.”

“How do you mean?”

Jinx sighed and leaned onto Lux’s shoulder.

“Do you know what BPD is, blondie?”

Lux tried to think back to her psychology classes, but it was coming up dry.

“It sounds familiar… but no, sorry.”

“It’s cool. Borderline Personality Disorder. To give you the tldr, it means that I’m absolute dog shit at regulating my emotions. Shit like impulsivity, insecurity, fear of abandonment, ect. At least that’s what my clinically assigned health advisor says. He sucks ass but, I think he’s right about this one.”

Lux hummed in affirmation that she was listening and reached a hand down to rub Jinx’s. She smiled softly at the contact and took another quick drag.

“It also means I kind of rubber band on mood swings. I can have a perfect day full of joy and happiness, and then I drop my plate of tacos during dinner and suddenly I’m the scum of the earth who doesn’t deserve to live. That’s not an exaggeration either. Sorry if that’s scary for you.”

It was, but Lux nodded along for her to continue.

“The point is sometimes I’m gonna make bad calls. And do bad things, and sometimes it’s probably gonna hurt you a lot. Just uh… I don’t know. Just a warning I guess? If you wanna be my… friend, then you should know what you’re in store for. Drug addict, ADHD, BPD, PTSD, and uhhh chronically good at sex.” She pushed an elbow out to nudge Lux at that, and Lux laughed.

“I can’t argue with that. Thanks for sharing that with me, I’m glad you trust me enough to. But, Jinx just because you have issues doesn’t mean I don’t want you in my life. And it never will. I already told you when you explained your track marks, our past doesn’t define us. Neither do disorders, or mental issues. You’re more than that to me Jinx, and you always will be. I can’t promise I won’t get upset if you hurt me, but I’ll try to be understanding and fair regardless.”

Jinx looked at her for a long few seconds with a genuine look of relief on her face before she nodded.

“Thanks. I was really afraid to tell you that for some reason, even though it’s kind of fucking obvious. That’s kind of why I’m out here too, insomnia was hitting hard and I was having progressively worse thoughts due to my inability to sleep, so I figured I would just smoke till I got sleepy, but it’s not working. Thanks though, I… I know you gotta go back home eventually, but I’m glad you want me in your life. You’re… kind of really important to me.”

Lux’s heart pounded in her chest at those words. The physical contact, the heartfelt sharing, the gentle affirmations from both sides. The dropping of walls, the honesty, the connection.

This was it, this could be the moment it happens, all she had to do was say it.

…

Come on you coward! Just spit it out! Just say you want to be her girlfriend! Her chest was so tight, her heart was so loud, her throat was so dry.

“J-J-Jinx? I uh-”

RING RING RING RING, RING RING RING RING, RING RING RING RING.

Jinx cursed aloud as her phone started ringing, groaning as she pulled it from her pocket.

“Ugh, fuck. Sorry I have to take this.”

With that she groaned again and put her phone to her ear, and Lux died a little bit on the inside.

“Hello? Yeah I know it’s you Carin, I have your number you don’t have to announce it. No. No dude. Just do us both a favor and stop now.”

Lux pulled away for a moment to steady her breath. It was okay, she could still do this, she could still confess. Once Jinx was done on the phone it was going to happen, she was going to ask Jinx to date.

“Can you just fucking stop already! I’m not buying from you anymore, I’m getting from other places you dick. No! Dude we fucked because you gave me drugs not because I was into it. You’re not my type, your place smells like dogshit, and you have the personality of a pigsty. No! Don’t call me again, asshole. No more fucking, and no more shimmer, the end. Just stay out of it. Oh fuck me for trying to get better right?! This is done, call me again and I call the cops on you asshat, I know where your stashes are.”

With that Jinx ended the call and dropped her phone to the bed of her truck, taking another drag of her cigarette and kicking the other side of the truck bed. Finally, she noticed Lux was still next to her and suddenly curled in a bit, looking sheepish.

“Sorry you had to hear that.”

…

Now wasn’t the time. Not after that. Jinx didn’t need someone else who wanted her, she just needed a shoulder to lean on, and by every God old and new Lux wanted to be that shoulder.

“It’s okay… do you want to talk about it?”

Jinx took a deep breath before tapping her cigarette off onto the pavement and then dropping it into a little ashtray that sat opposite to Lux.

“This one isn’t as complex. I don’t make that much money, right now my only income is selling drugs and occasionally fixing people’s cars who I know. Neither are really a proper business. I could make either into one but… I don’t know. So shimmer isn’t exactly cheap, and even selling it doesn’t feed a habit. So a few months ago I heard about this guy, Carin. Bartender at Starlight-In, sells shimmer, has a thing for ‘crazy girls’. I meet him, flirt him up, I sleep with him a few times to get shimmer. And I don’t want to anymore, pretty much. It’s not like it’s his fault, he’s chill. Well actually he’s being a dick about it, so I guess I was wrong about him being a cool guy. Fuckin prick. Anyway, uhm… I just… since we started I haven’t been sleeping around as much as I usually would. Actually since we fucked I haven’t been with anyone at all. I don’t wanna risk getting you an STI, you know?"

Oddly enough it was a kind of sweet sentiment, and Lux smiled.

“Well I’m sorry he’s being mean because of it, but I really appreciate that. I know I haven’t said anything but I kind’ve thought we were exclusive. Was that wrong?”

Jinx threw it around in her head for a few moments before shaking her head.

“No, you aren’t wrong. I’m cool with that too. You’re way better than the usual lays around here. And you’re a lot cooler, and smarter, and prettier, and kinder and… yeah I guess it was pretty much exclusive from the start.”

Lux would’ve never guessed that hearing Jinx say those words would make her feel so happy, but they did. She was still a bit concerned about Jinx’s sex history, she wasn’t going to lie, but being exclusive friend with benefits… that was really only one step away from dating right? They just needed romance and, bang. And Jinx’s history was just that. Her’s. Was she still jealous? Yeah… really really bad. That might’ve had some influence on her next choices.

“Good. Why don’t we go back to my room? It’s still early, we could sleep in, spend the morning being lazy… maybe spend some time connecting…” She accentuated her last addition with a gentle lilt of her finger across Jinx’s cheeks, and she smiled with pride when Jinx shivered. “And after we can go get a late lunch. My treat.”

“Yeah. Gods that sounds nice.” She whispered, her voice shaking just a bit.

Lux giggled and wrapped her hand around Jinx’s.

“Come on, let’s go.”

Across the parking lot, back onto campus, inside the elevator, and when Lux pulled Jinx down into the bed, they never stopped holding hands.

--

The third time this morning that Lux woke up, it wasn’t to a disturbance, or a loud noise, it was just to her own natural circadian rhythm. It was still dark in her room, the blackout curtains in her window doing wonders to keep the sun out and Lux sleeping in. She squirmed just a bit in place before turning over to face the other side of the room. When her eyes fluttered open, she gasped in fright.

There sitting in the blackness of her room were two single intense eyes filled with a deep pink ocean. Unblinking, unmarred, unphased by her moving. Just staring at her. Through her. Watching. At the sound of her gasp Jinx startled back as well, the rest of her features besides those near glowing eyes becoming easier to see as her own vision adjusted.

“Flashlight?” Jinx whispered.

“S-Sorry, I just wasn’t expecting you to just be staring at me like that. It spooked me. What are you doing?”

Jinx seemed to stutter over her words for a moment before she spoke.

“Well I still couldn’t sleep so… I w-was watching you.”

…

“Watching me?”

“Yeah. Just like, watching you sleep, and breathe and stuff. Actually I pretty much always do that when I can’t sleep. Does that bother you? I guess thinkin about it, it’s kinda creepy of me.”

For as creepy as it was, now that she wasn’t just surprised by a pair of gorgeous yet terrifying eyes, Lux actually didn’t mind it. She kind of liked it even… was that weird? There were already a myriad of things that Jinx did that Lux figured anyone else on the planet would find deplorable. Not her though, apparently her type was whatever the hell Jinx was.

“No, it's fine. You can keep doing it, I just wasn’t expecting it, that’s all.” Lux said, pushing some of the hair away from her face.

“Long as I’m not making you uncomfortable. But yeah you’re like, hella nice to watch when you're relaxed. Like you’re already nice to look at all the time, but you do some really cute things in your sleep. Like sometimes you mumble to yourself in your sleep, or twitch your shoulder and then lean into me for more warmth on instinct. Am I making this better or worse?”

That certainly was a question.

“How about I let you watch me when I sleep, and in exchange you don’t share every single detail with me. Yeah?”

She coughed and smiled sheepishly.

“Yeah. Will do.”

Lux adjusted in again, pushing some of the covers off to pull and arm up and reach over to brush Jinx’s shoulder.

“So, how should we start our lazy Saturday?”

With a gentle hum of satisfaction, Jinx leaned into the touch. From this close even in the dark, Lux could see the way her teeth began to dig into her bottom lip. Lux couldn’t help but follow up with it before Jinx could respond.

“Because… I think I have a few ideas.”

She used the hand on Jinx’s shoulder to grip hard and push down, forcing Jinx onto her back before quickly getting up from the bed. A leg was thrown over Jinx’s waist, and in a moment Lux was straddling her, now a hand on both of her shoulders. Jinx’s eyes were wide and her breaths deep and shaky. Lux leaned down until their lips were just inches apart, and smiled when she could feel Jinx lean in. She had other ideas, and pulled away at the same pace, leaving Jinx’s lips unrequited. When Jinx opened her eyes with confusion, Lux smirked with a giggle.

“Who said that’s what I meant? Maybe I just wanted to wrestle.”

Jinx’s eyes flashed between confused, then frustrated, then excited as suddenly two hands clamped onto Lux’s waist.

“Nuh uh, no way.” Jinx said with a sardonic grin, holding Lux to her. “You don’t get to play hard to get after initiating. Not today.”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” Lux giggled back, feeling Jinx start to grind her hips up ever so slightly.

“Mhm? Yeah we’ll see about that, flashlight.” Jinx said, leaning up.

Lux didn’t deny her the kiss this time, and responded in moments, her lips opening to let Jinx’s tongue in. It was fantastic, it always was, and the need on Jinx’s voice when she moaned in satisfaction of the kiss only drove her further into herself. When they parted again Lux looked at those lovely but creepy eyes that had been watching her all night, and shivered.

“Know something Jinx? I think I’ve got a thing for ‘crazy girls’ too.” she whispered with a giggle. Jinx’s eyes went wide and she breathed out a ‘fuck…’ before pulling Lux back into another kiss.

Their lazy morning was about to be a bit less lazy.

--

Eventually Lux crashed back down onto the bed with a heavy sigh, covered in sweat and filled with a deep sense of relaxation. The sex with Jinx was incredible, not that she had a point of reference, but it wasn’t exactly tough to realize how nice it felt. Beside her she could feel Jinx’s breath slowing down, a heavy groan escaping from her lips as she sat up.

“Fuck Lux… I didn’t think you had that in you… you should really boss me around like that more often.”

Lux blushed and meekly hit Jinx on the shoulder.

“Stop joking around, that was embarrassing. I don’t know what came over me.”

“I’m not joking. Seriously. That was incredible. Please take charge more often.”

Lux blushed and turned away, but nodded regardless. She heard Jinx laugh from behind her and start getting up from the bed.

“Good. You mind if I get a shower? I’m kinda gross.”

That was a good reminder of just how sweaty Lux had gotten as well. She grimaced at the feeling and started to get up as well.

“Sure, but don’t take too long. I have to shower too, and I’m really hungry so I want to go for lunch soon.”

“Why don’t we just get one together? Saves time right?”

Oh. Lux felt another blush run over her. Wasn’t that too intimate? They were just friends with benefits, platonic lovers, Lux’s crush aside that felt like something proper couples did. But if Jinx was okay with it…

“Y-Yeah we can do that.” Lux said, meekly walking towards Jinx at the bathroom door.

“We don’t have to, I just figured if you’re hungry it saves time right?”

Lux swallowed and nodded as if the thought of showering with Jinx was making her heart pound a million beats a second.

“Nono you’re right, I’m hungry and it’s not like we haven’t seen each other naked. I mean… we’re naked right now so…”

As if to prove Lux’s point, Jinx grinned and made a very crude gesture to herself, to which Lux had to sigh and look away.

“Yes, thank you Jinx. I’m fully aware you have a penis. You did not have to point it out as such.”

“Aww come on Luxie. Appreciate some dick humor now and then. I think you’ll find it’ll… really tickle your funny bone.” Jinx said with the biggest dumbest grin of the century.

“I will kick you out of this room naked if you don’t shut up and get into the shower right now.” Lux said, unable to stop herself from laughing just a bit at the stupid joke.

“Oooh, already getting back to bossing me around huh? Careful blondie, Or else I might need something extra in the shower.”

An audible groan came from Lux as she walked into the bathroom, tired of Jinx’s shenanigans. Jinx seemed rather pleased with herself all things considered, and followed after.

“Can you turn the shower on?” Lux asked. “I gotta brush my teeth first.”

She turned to the mirror and went through the routine, peeking up to look at Jinx in the reflection. Lux had to admit that seeing Jinx naked, and being naked around Jinx, were both getting significantly easier the more time they spent together. It shouldn’t have been all that surprising she supposed, anything gets easier the more time you spend doing it, but it was still a new feeling nonetheless. It was nice to be that comfortable with someone, that you could be fully dressed, in your underwear, or totally naked and still be relaxed.

Jinx, for some odd reason, was actually looking a bit uncomfortable, despite this being her idea in the first place, and when she noticed Lux looking at her, Jinx moved a hand up to rub her neck and used the other to gesture a thumb towards the shower.

“I uh… don’t know how to turn it on. I’m kinda used to Zaun showers, not fancy Piltover shit.”

Lux would’ve made a comment about how adorable Jinx was if she didn’t already have a toothbrush in her mouth, so instead she gave Jinx a thumbs up and finished the process.

“Here, it’s easy.” She said, wiping her face off with a hand towel and turning to the shower. “You see this thing here? Kind of looks like a wing? You just push it down like this.” As she demonstrated the shower barked to life, the water quickly turning hot and filling the room with steam.

“What? Why the fuck is that how it works?” Jinx asked, suddenly shouldering in to look at it. “Surely you could just have a knob, or a handle. Why this complicated bullshitery?”

Lux rolled her eyes before stepping into the shower, sighing as the hot water hit her skin and echoed off the relaxation she had just been given. Jinx still seemed perplexed by the shower, and Lux had to give her a flick on the head to get her attention.

“Are you just gonna stand there, or are you gonna get in?” Lux said, crossing her arms.

Apparently the sight of Lux in the shower was enough to pull Jinx out of her stupor, and she cleared her throat before stepping inside. They tried their best to both stand close enough that the water washed down on them, and yet far enough away that they weren’t making the other uncomfortable, which honestly made the situation a lot less enjoyable.

When she imagined the two of them showering together, she wanted them to be together, Lux in Jinx’s arms, skin against skin as the hot water washed their stress away. Maybe one of them would offer to wash the other’s hair, and then wash their back and…

This wasn’t so kind. It was stiff, awkward, and noncommittal. But Lux was still afraid. Afraid that the moment she tried to go too far with Jinx that her feelings would be forced out into the open and Jinx would reject her, breaking the best thing that had ever happened to her before. She just couldn’t risk that, not yet, friends with benefits was okay. It meant they could have sex, hold each other, kiss, and that was enough. She was content. If she had to endure a few rigid showers instead of the wholesome warmth she fantasized about, then so be it.

When they finally got out and dried off, Jinx made another stupid joke, and some more banter was had, and eventually they began discussing where to go to lunch. It was nice, so fucking nice, to have someone she felt connected with. And besides, she could wait. There was no timer, no risk of it ending. The romance game could last as long as she needed.

Chapter Text

-Jinx-

--

Lunch was pretty nice, all things considered. Lux took her to a ramen place a new friend on her volleyball team she just joined showed her, and it was pretty damn good. After they went back to Lux’s room to work on different things, Lux on some research paper she had to do for Professor Morgana’s Demacian Sociology class, and Jinx on her presentation for the Gala Symposium. It was getting closer and closer, and she only had a vague idea on what she was going to be doing.

Working on projects in the same room with Lux was, again, nice, minus her lacking access to her garage for any actual tests or physical aids (which she was going to have quite a few) and she still technically needed to get it approved by Viktor since it had some… minorly dangerous aspects. She still wasn’t sure if the content was something that foreign snobby scholars would want to watch but she didn’t care what they thought.

Ok maybe she desperately wanted the approval and praise from teach but, there was no reason for that, totally not that Viktor was the only older male figure in her life currently who had encouraged her, and totally not because of her daddy issues. Yeesh, she decided to take a page out of Lux’s book and pack that little nugget away for later.

Regardless, the project was progressing… well. Nice. Everything this day was just nice. Sitting in Lux’s room with a pile of blueprints and engineering and chemistry books, totally using the procedure and information for… non dubious uses. Well, even if the stiffs watching didn’t approve of her project, it was sure going to be memorable.

Lux seemed to be having far less success with her paper. There were constant sighs and groans of frustration coming from her computer desk, augmented by the occasional lean back in her chair with hands pressed to her forehead. The fifth time the chair lean happened Jinx decided she needed a checkup.

Wordlessly she walked up behind Lux, wrapping her arms around the chair to lean against Lux’s shoulder, and plopping her chin down onto Lux’s head. She didn’t protest, didn’t even really acknowledge it at all, just looked at that paper.

“Demacian Political Landscape and Its Connection to Modern Culture.” Jinx read from the title “Blegh, that sucks. Sounds boring as hell.”

“It is.” Lux responded, giving a soft groan when Jinx began to gently knead at her shoulders. She gave a quiet ‘thank you’ before addressing her laptop. “You’d think this would be easy, considering I’ve spent my life wrapped in this but it’s sooo boring. The class itself is great but the prof is working from a different teacher’s syllabus because she got moved to teaching it at the last minute and gods you can tell it was written by an old man who’s been out of touch a majority of his life.”

“Well, hey, at least you’ve got the hottest professor in the building. I’d let Prof. Morgana give me a lecture any time.”

“1. Gross, 2. She is a really good teacher, and 3. … me too.” She all but whispered the last part and Jinx laughed, pulling one from Lux as well. Nice. Everything was just nice. She moved her hands to Lux’s neck and smiled at the hum of approval she was given.

“Hey uh, random idea.” Jinx said, shifting in place for a moment as her mind thought wholly treacherous thoughts about Lux. “I was thinking maybe… tonight we could go somewhere for dinner as well. Somewhere nicer. Or maybe we could like, go see a movie, or something idk. DO something y’know instead of just chill in your room.”

Lux pulled away from the massage and turned to face Jinx with a slight smile on her face.

“I’d love to Jinx but I have volleyball tonight, remember?”

Jinx mentally slapped herself for forgetting and nodded.

“Ah, my bad. I-It’s cool we can just not do it.”

“Nono I do want to. It’s just a bad time so… what if we just did it tomorrow? Maybe I could show up at your place around like 5?”

A grin snuck onto Jinx’s face as she swallowed hard and nodded.

“Y-Yeah that sounds great. I’ll make sure I’m ready on time.”

There was a hint of red in Lux’s face as she smiled back, and it brought those treacherous thoughts back to the forefront of her mind. Gods how pathetic she was, reassuring herself for so long that romance wasn’t real only to want Lux by her side more and more and more. And the worst part is Jinx hardly hated herself for it, and that voice reminding her of what happened between Ekko and her got more and more easier to ignore.

But even if she wanted it, it’s not like Lux did, and maybe even if she did it would hardly matter. After college she was going back to Demacia anyway, and Jinx suspected she might be the worst person in the world at a long-distance relationship.

Even if she didn’t hate herself for starting to fall, she did hate herself for the situation it put her in. Awkward looks, painfully hugs, frustrating smiles, and sex was just making it hurt more and more. And how the hell was she going to manage the Gala? She knew for a fact she was going to look stupid, following Lux around like a lust puppy all like “Hi, I’m Lux’s best friend, don’t question why I keep looking at her like I want to shove her over that table there and have absolutely furious sex with her.”

But those weren’t thoughts for today. Today was nice, today was relaxing, even if they were doing schoolwork.

--

When Jinx woke up the next morning, things were fairly normal. There wasn’t exactly a routine that she followed, she knew damn well she wouldn’t be able to follow a schedule like that, but she went through the things she knew had to be done, just at a nonstandard and variable order. Kuro was fed, shower was taken, breakfast was made, (and by breakfast she meant coffee and a cigarette outside) and her clothes were washed and dried. Pretty good day by her standard, but effort was called for when something important rolled around. She was even just starting to fold the clothes.

That’s when she heard the first noise.

A slight clang, almost imperceptible echoing from what must have been her kitchen. Jinx froze in an instant. Nobody else was supposed to be home right now. Vi was finally getting her glasses and Caitlyn was with her. She’d watched them both leave together, in one car, and that car wasn’t outside, according to her window.

So then…

What made the noise?

Then a thump, far closer than the clanging from below. Close enough that it could have been on the stairs.

Oh fuck.

Jinx broke free of her paralysis and made for her bed, hopping up onto it and sliding her arm down under the frame. Her fingers wrapped around what she called her ‘insurance policy’ and she waited.

Someone had to be in the house, there was no other explanation for those noises. She could feel her chest tightening at the thought. Who the fuck was it, just a random burglar?

Footsteps, further down the hall and directly towards her door. Fuck, that wasn’t random.

The whispers agreed with her, and Jinx pulled her pistol from the slat she had duck taped it to. She curled herself into the corner of the room, where her bed was pressed up against the wall, and she shook. The pistol never left its aim on the door, even as she trembled so violently that Jinx was afraid she would drop the gun at any moment.

Ka-dum, Ka-dum, Ka-dum

Her heart pounded in her chest, the only real sound she was sure of at this point. That, and her enemy, whoever they were.

Another few creeping steps forward.

Ka-dum, Ka-dum, Ka-dum

Was it the same deal from the concert? Glasc, Sevika, Corina… who?

Ka-dum, Ka-dum, Ka-dum

Fuck… fuck fuck fuck! Why wouldn’t the motherfucker just open the door! Fuck! The shadows of her room were starting to move now, ever so slightly, flashing in an attempt to scare the shit out of her.

Ka-dum, Ka-dum, Ka-dum

Their hand was on the doorknob, Jinx watched it twitch. Her gun made a sort of ker-chick noise as she primed it.

Fuck, if this asshole was here, who else could be around? Who else were they after? Vi? Caitlyn? L… Lux?

Fuck please not her, gods fucking alive anything but getting her into trouble. The knob turned.

Ka-dum, Ka-dum, Ka-dum, Ka-dum, Ka-dum, Ka-dum, Ka-dum

Every second the pounding in her chest got louder and louder as a ringing sound filled Jinx’s ears, and she waited, frozen as the door began to swing open.

The moment its arc was enough that it wouldn’t stop a shot, Jinx squeezed the trigger.

Click

…

Her eyes opened with a suspicious blink, and looked blankly at the gun. It wasn’t loaded. Dread washed over her as she snapped her head up to her assailant.

The door was closed.

…

What?

Jinx slowly stood from the bed, and crept across her room, body still shaking violently. Eyes darting back and forth, she pushed the door open. No one was in the hallway. For good measure, not setting the gun down, she examined the house top to bottom. Besides her and her snake, there was not another living thing in that house. Purely empty. But- but she heard them.

And then the voices started.

All your fault. All your fault.

You’re a Jinx! You hear me!

Jinx’s breath picked up and she pressed her wrists to her ears, trying to block out the sound. It didn’t work.

All you do is hurt. All you do is ruin. All you do is break. You’re worthless, you’re a burden, you’re a creep!

Ka-dum, Ka-dum, Ka-dum, Ka-dum

“Fuck!” Jinx cried out to their empty home.

Then she felt the cool material of her pistol, resting at her head while she covered her ears. Unloaded. Harmless. She uncovered her ears and held the firearm in front of her.

You already tried it once, right! Made a big ol’ fuckin firework show just for Dad, with you as the main event. Come on. Finish what you started. Don’t be a baby, Powder. C’mon, it would be soooo easy.

Jinx stared as her heart beat and beat and beat, a constant reminder of the blood flowing through her body, of the system in which she survived. The voice was right, it would be easy. It would take guts, and then be over in a second. No one else had to face her, on one else had to be Jinxed.

In a moment of clarity, Jinx roared to no one and threw the gun back into her room.

“Fuck you!” Her scream echoed around her. “Get out of my fucking head!”

The voices didn’t like this response, which was understandable, considering she was quite rude to them.

It got worse. They got louder. More specific. Vander’s voice, Silco’s voice, Lux’s voice. Begging her, yelling at her, blaming her. Her eyes decided, “Hey, y’know joining the kick the shit out of this loser gang sounds great right now, you mind if I take a round?” and Jinx watched as the shadows moved, becoming monsters and ghosts of things she’d watched die. Things that should be dead. Were dead.

Ka-dum, Ka-dum, Ka-dum

Fuck… fuck! It wasn’t going away, none of it was fucking going away! She couldn’t stop her chest, she couldn’t stop her head, she couldn’t do anything but wait.

That’s it, cry! Cry like the weak loser you are! Pathetic!

She was, she realized, and she couldn’t stop them as the anger started to fade, and desperation filled her tone instead.

“Please…” She sobbed, wrapping her arms around her legs.

Useless druggie. Street rat. You’ll be dead on the streets in two years anyway.

Jinx’s eyes slammed open, so fast the light hurt a bit.

Yeah… yeah, a druggie.

Before the voices could say anything else, Jinx was already across the room, ripping open her desk and scrambling for the things she had inside. Three vials of shimmer left. In a sort of twist in expectations, setting up the needle was strangely calming. Loading the tool up after sanitization, the satisfying click of the mechanical pieces going into place, the removal of the self as she primed her arm and made sure her vein was easily accessible. All of it was familiar, in a way that Jinx probably should’ve taken and run with. It might have been able to calm her down, set her back to moderately depressed from violently suicidal.

But she didn’t follow that trail, she didn’t take a deep breath to slow her heart, which was still pounding a thousand times a minute. Being calm wasn’t enough, being base level Jinx wasn’t enough, she needed to make it all go away, she needed to empty everything out.

Ka-dum, Ka-dum, Ka-dum, Ka-dum, Ka-dum

Jinx was ready now, left arm out in front of her and the syringe death gripped in her right. She took in a deep quivering breath, and just as she started to hear whispers coming back, Jinx lined up her shot.

“Fuck you.” She said to no one as she forced herself to watch like always.

The needle entered her skin, and Jinx whimpered at the sight. It was just enough for what she needed, and her thumb pressed in on the plunger. The syringe tool was a fairly complex piece of machinery, in retrospect. It assisted with injections by stabilizing the vial of material within so that even if you were shaking, the needle shouldn’t, and the frame would keep it safe. Even with that counterbalance, the whole device shook in Jinx’s hand.

She let out a pathetic wince of breath as she felt the rush in her arm. Then the purple hue, then the pain. Oh gods she knew that pain well, and it was a heroic relief in this moment. The tool clicked as it injected the last of her shimmer, and Jinx drew it out, tears falling from her eyes as she put it down.

Now to just-

Ka-dum, Ka-dum, Ka-dum… !!! ….

Thump… Thump…. Thump

Directly in her temples, her heartbeats rhythm change from the anxious and fear filled battery to a rhythmic pulsing bliss.

Yeaaaaaaaahh…

Jinx leaned back in her chair as her eyes grew warm and her brain felt fuzzy. Fuuuck that was the stuff. Now, she just needed to-

The voices interrupted her as they came back. A minefield of everything she’d had forced through her brain today, and the thumping picked up in pace.

No… no no no the shimmer was supposed to make it go away! Why were there still voices? Why were the shadows still moving? Fuck!

She pressed her fingers to her temples and tried to focus on the bliss of every thump, just like she usually did. That echoing sensation of vein to vein, pulsing and throbbing together.

It just wasn’t enough.

“Fuck…” Screamed Jinx, or at least tried to scream. It came out more akin to a dog whimpering when its owner walked outside without it.

Gods… why wasn’t it going away? Why wasn’t it enough? What did she need to do?

Then her eyes traveled to the syringe tool.

…
Thump, Thump, Thump, Thump

Jinx reached her shaky hand out, head still ringing from the shimmer. If one vial wasn’t enough… What about two vials? She’d never gone two vials before.

Thump, Thump, Thump, Thump

Jinx ejected the used needle and sanitized for a new one. Then, with empty eyes and slow jerky movements, she loaded up her second dose. She couldn’t inject in the same spot, so without even thinking about it Jinx sanitized and primed her right arm this time.

At the last moment, Jinx realized perhaps what a stupid fucking idea this was. And she was about to tell herself that this was a one-way trip to the grave, no takesy backsies this time. Only when she looked to her arm to say so, the needle was already inside, and the vial was already half empty.

Oh.

Thump, Thump, Thump, Thump

Thump… Thump… Thump… Thump…

Thump… Thump…

…

Thump… Thump…

Wh… what? What was happening? Why was… oh the needle was on the counter now. Huh… okay. Why was she here? Jinx felt, for some odd reason, like she had been anxious, but for the life of her she couldn’t figure out exactly why.

Thump…

Thump…

Huh. Funny. Then there was a great crash somewhere nearby, and Jinx searched violently for the cause. It took her a moment, but she discovered the sound came from someone hitting the ground.

Ooooh… it was her. She was on the floor. Haha… Weird…

Thump…

…

Thump…

God everything was… fuckin’ warm. Shit…

It was so hard to move, like one hundred sandbags had been placed on her arms and legs, only the sandbags must have been filled with crabs that kept trying to escape their imprisonment. That was likely the cause of the tingling. The crabs.

She was so smart…

Thump…

…

Thump…

Out of the corner of her eye, Jinx could see her alarm clock. 4. Oh yeah. She had a date in an hour. She… had to get ready… for Lux.

Thump…

…

…

Thump…

…

…

…

…

…

Chapter Text

-Lux-

--

Nerves were not an uncommon thing for Lux, especially when it came to the more important aspects and decisions of her life. Even when it wasn’t a life changing choice and just something subjectively important to her, anxiety was a common emotion. When things just started to slip through your hands and all of your over-meticulous prep counted for nothing and every ounce of control you had on the situation just fell to pieces? 

That, Lux decided, was the worst thing in the world.

So it wasn’t strange that she was anxious about going out with Jinx tonight. Although, sort of anxious in a way that she was getting used to. Their relationship was getting more and more complex with every casual touch, every little smile, every look that seemed to last a bit too long. But Lux was not intimidated. This stage was fine, normal even, and it could take as long as it needed.

This did not change this date being important. It wasn’t like it was anything all that special, they were just going to a local arcade, but it felt important. Felt like a big step she needed to take. Every inch forward was an inch closer to girlfriend status. Assuming that girlfriend status was on the table in the first place, which she hoped it was.

Getting dressed for time with Jinx wasn’t hard, and Jinx was the person to thank for that. It was painfully obvious what skin to show and what to cover to get Jinx’s eyes roaming over you, and so all that needed to be done was some layer adding for the cold. Her shoulderless sweater was a must, Jinx seemed to have a thing for her shoulders, and if it was warm enough she would have put on that pink skirt that Jinx always seemed to have her eyes on. And now that Lux was becoming more sex positive, she could confidently say it was because she “had an ass that doesn’t stop.” To keep with that trait, she picked out her warmest pair of Yoga pants and a nicer pair of boots. A coat was all it needed, and clothes were set.

Makeup was quick and easy, just a small amount to get Jinx to notice, bag was prepped and ready, and before she knew it 4 had come around and she was making for the bus to Jinx’s house.

She sent Jinx a quick text announcing that she was on the way, and Jinx’s phone marked it as read immediately. She waited patiently for the response, but it didn’t come. She was probably busy getting ready after all.

The bus trip was fine, she went to Jinx’s on that route enough that the bus driver was starting to recognize her, and would always ask how she was doing, or “back to campus hun?” when she was returning. At 4:45 she was walking up to Jinx’s front door, still nothing said back. The garage door was closed interestingly, but she could see Jinx’s light was on. Another text.

// Lux: I’m outside now :p //

Read.

Nothing.

Lux made a frowning face before ringing the doorbell. 30 seconds later she rang it again and still got no response. The heck was taking her so long?

“Jinx?” She called, hoping the sound was enough for Jinx to hear her. Then she banged her fist on the door a few times, frustration starting to mount. Gods, she probably fucking fell asleep. Ugggh, she could be the worst when it came to shit like that. Always forgetting important things you told her and then looking like a sad little puppy when you got slightly annoyed she forgot.

One more round of pounding and calling, and Lux had enough. The front door was locked, but she’d watched Jinx plug in the garage code a ton of times. In moments she was inside, seeing… all of the vehicles of the family. Strange. If her sister was home, Lux expected she would have let her in. The door inside that connected with the kitchen wasn’t locked, and Lux strolled right inside. The lights on the first floor were out and the house seemed to be silent, which put a chill down Lux’s spine. She’d never seen the house so… still. Kind of like Jinx, it was usually in movement when Jinx was around, but like this it looked so cold. So dead.

Welp, that problem would be fixed once she woke Jinx up. Huffing a little she made for the stairs and up to Jinx’s room. For good measure, she knocked a few times on the door.

“Jinx, are you in there?”

…

Nothing.

Lux threw the door open.

“You know you could have at least set…”

In an instant everything went cold, as cold as the house had looked moments before. Everything seemed to slow down to a grinding halt. The door rattled a little as it hit the wall, but didn’t swing back enough to obstruct Lux’s view. The breath left her body like she’d been kicked square in the chest, and Lux’s hands flew up to cover her mouth.

There, lying completely still in the middle of the carpet, was Jinx. And next to her, plainly visible on the ground, some kind of syringe, or needle device, with a broken little glass vial and a pinkish purple stain on the ground. Her eyes were closed and her mouth hung open like a limp rag. All over her arms, and her neck, and her head, her veins held a purple and twitching hue that made Lux want to scream at just the sight.

…

No…

No no no no no this couldn’t be happening, oh gods this couldn’t be happening.

“Jinx!” Time seemed to unfreeze and Lux was at her side in a second. She took hold of her by the edges of her t-shirt and tried to wake her up.

“Jinx. Jinx it’s Lux. Jinx please wake up, I’m scared I don’t know what’s happening. J… Jinx?”

She was cold as ice, and for a non-insignificant amount of time, Lux thought she was dead.

What the fuck was she supposed to do? Gods fuck! Her chest was tight, she couldn’t stop the way her breathing forced in and out of her chest far too fast, tears were already streaming down her face and she felt too hot and too cold all at the same time. She needed to do something, and so with a manner of urgency she pressed two fingers to the pulse point on Jinx’s neck and held.

Nothing.

Fuck fuck fuck! More tears were coming now, her body shivering with fear as she pulled the shirt up to expose her bare chest and pressed her ear against it.

Thump…

…

…

…

Thump…

Oh gods, oh her heart was beating, barely and far slower than it should’ve been, but beating. Oh fuck Lux let out a sob of relief. She wasn’t dead, not yet, but she was still in danger. It was clear she’d done something with shimmer, something that made her end up like this.

Her phone was out in a second and she was starting to dial the emergency line as she looked at Jinx. Then something flashed in her head.

If she reported this to the hospital, if they came to get Jinx, legally it would expose her as a shimmer user. That’d be a major felony in Piltover, and at the very least would cost her the young inventors scholarship. That was the only thing that allowed Jinx to go to Piltover Academy, and without it she’d be forced to drop out.

Jinx acted and pretended otherwise, but Lux knew she wanted to graduate. She knew Jinx wanted to succeed, to prove she could do it, and if Lux made this one choice here, Jinx would never get that chance. But if she did nothing, Jinx might die! 

In a fit of shock and illogical terror, Lux dropped her phone and pulled Jinx up into her arms.

“Oh Jinx.” She sobbed into the girl’s shoulder, sniffling hysterics as the seemingly lifeless body hung in her embrace. She just kept saying her name over and over again, the muscles above her zygomatic arch already starting to ache with use as she cried. She wasn’t sure how long she held Jinx to her. Minutes? Hours? Years? Time seemed so unreal in that moment, all that existed was her and Jinx and the fear. She was shaking violently now, and a churn in her stomach suddenly rose up. Lux only just managed to drop Jinx and grab the nearest trash can before she vomited her lunch into it.

She pulled back with another sob and wiped her face with her sleeve, immediately taking Jinx into her arms again. At some point, though Lux wasn’t sure how she managed this, she had moved both of them onto Jinx’s bed, Lux desperately clinging to the flutter of life that was Jinx’s slow thumping heartbeat.

“I’ve got you Jinx.” Her voice chanted with little conviction between sobs. “It’s okay, I’m here, it’s gonna be okay, I have you. I have you. I have you Jinx.”

Any trace of hope was starting to lapse from her heart, and she almost gave up and called the EMTs.

“F- Fl…… Flaaashlight?”

Lux’s eyes shot open as she pulled Jinx back. Her eyelids were starting to flutter, and her head was turning back and forth on its own. She groaned before Lux could respond, no motor control available by the way her fingers twitched and then went limp.

“Jinx!” Cried Lux. “Oh thank the Gods Jinx, oh fuck, oh fuck you’re alive.”

“Whaat? I… would…. Woudn… wooden… like that.”

Jinx’s eyes barely opened all the way, and her eye was filled with the awful pink hue. Those pupil’s were unfocused and fuzzy, and she seemed to look more with her neck than her eyes. She spoutted another line of gibberish, before she finally looked past, not at, Lux.

“What… water… you doin here?”

Lux took in a shaky breath.

“W-We were supposed to have a date Jinx. Remember? The arcade?”

Jinx seemed to hold onto this for what felt like hours, before her eyes went wide.

“Ooooh no!” She weakly called. “I need… get ready.”

Lux couldn’t help but let out a shaky laugh as she pulled Jinx pack in.

“It’s okay Jinx, it’s okay I’m here. You’re gonna be okay. We’re gonna be okay.”

Jinx didn’t respond any further, and only barely coming down from her panic, Lux held her like a lifeline. She just stayed like that, holding Jinx through the overdose and trying her best to assist. She helped Jinx breath, kept her warm, kept checking her pulse and summarily freaking out at how low Jinx’s blood pressure and heart rate was. But she was still here. She was still alive, and Lux felt like the world had just been taken from her shoulders.

She had the wisdom, at some point, to get her phone and read about shimmer overdoses while she held Jinx, checking the symptoms, what was potentially lethal and non-lethal, and how long it would be in Jinx’s system. She had to guess how much Jinx had taken, she wasn’t much help in her confused state, and judged it would take at least 4 hours for her to finally come down from the high. 9 PM. It might slowly get better though, enough that she could rest easy about Jinx not dying, which she was still dearly afraid of.

Oh gods.

Jinx had almost died.

If Lux hadn’t come, Jinx would’ve died .

The gravity of the situation hit her, that one of the most beautiful and incredible flames in her life had almost been extinguished, and that almost brought another bout of wracking sobs to her throat. They were stopped, when she heard the sound of a door closing from below, and a voice she’d never heard before yelling.

“Powder I’m home! Hey after my appointment Cupcake took me to the store and I got that chicken you like and some fresh peppers. I was thinking I could make us spicy peanut stir fry for dinner. You in?”

Oh fuck that must’ve been Jinx’s sister. And, Powder? Cupcake?

She didn’t have time to contemplate though, if Vi didn’t get a response she’d come up and check on them, and see Jinx in her state, and all of this would have been for nothing. In for a penny, in for a pound, she supposed, she couldn’t let anyone know about what happened.

Lux made for Jinx’s bathroom, quickly wiping away the makeup that had run and smudged from her crying. 

“Pow-Pow? I just heard you stalkin’ around up there you goblin. I don’t care if you’re shitting, just let me know if you want my dinner.”

Her eyes were still a bit red and puffy, but maybe she could pass it off to Vi as them using weed. Jinx had mentioned Vi smoked pot too, so it would probably be believable. With a long deep breath, and a check on Jinx to make sure she was still breathing, Lux headed down the stairs.

Vi was facing away from her at the stove top, apparently starting the dinner she’d proposed for her and Jinx. She was tall, not quite as tall as Caitlyn, maybe 5’9” or so, but still very intimidating. And unlike Caitlyn, this girl was jacked. Her back muscles and biceps must’ve been made of sculpted marble the way they flexed when she worked, her tight tank top exposing them and a series of intricate tattoos that covered her back and arms. Below she was just wearing a tight pair of jeans, a pair of boots not unlike Jinx’s leaning against the front door.

“If you were gonna come downstairs you should’ve just said something.” Vi said with a chuckle, and Lux cleared her throat.

“Uhm… Hi.”

Vi’s spine went taught, and she turned around with surprise in gaze. Her hair was this deep deep pink, so deep it was almost red, shaved on one side, and on that same side was a tattoo of the numeral VI on her cheek. Her pale blue eyes were behind a pair of bottom rimmed glasses, which had fallen down her crooked nose ever so slightly. She bore freckles, just like Jinx, although hers weren’t as all encompassing as Jinx’s dusting.

“Oh, uh, hey.” Vi said, her eyes darting from side to side.

“I’m Lux. Jinx’s friend.”

Vi nodded, an eyebrow raising in understanding.

“Riiight. I’m Violet, just call me Vi though. Sorry, did I intrude on you guys? If I need to leave no problem, I can go crash with my girlfriend until you guys are done.”

Lux thrust her hands out as a flustered red filled her cheeks. Vi knew about the two of them? What had Jinx told her?

“No! No no, it’s nothing like that. We uhm, well we just took some edibles, and Jinx kind of fell asleep. So, I was just coming down to tell you that’s why she wasn’t answering. And, we uhm, decided… that we were gonna get takeout once the high was gone. Yeah, yeah sorry I'm totally into… drugs.”

Vi did not look convinced, but shrugged as she turned back to her stir fry prep.

“Hmm, well I’m willing to cook for three if you want, you guys would just have to heat it up when you’re hungry. If not, it’s cool though. Why don’t you grab a glass of water while you’re down here. You look… well, shitty.”

This was probably the truth, and Lux did dearly need some water at the moment, as her tears seemed to sap every ounce of hydration from her body. She nodded and filled a glass up, downing the whole thing there, before filling it up again, downing it again, and filling it up a third time.

“Thank you.” Lux murmured, her voice mousy, taking the water and moving to the stairs. Vi just waved an arm in a ‘fogetaboutit’ motion, and she darted to return to Jinx’s side.

Jinx hadn’t moved from where she’d laid her to rest, and her eyes were a little more open then they had been before. She was just staring up at the ceiling, clearly seeing but not understanding. It was like the lifeless expression she’d seen that first night in the bar, only 11 times worse. Her heart broke all over again and the realization truly hit.

She’d almost lost Jinx.

Permanently.

She was on the bed again in seconds, holding Jinx and crying into her shoulder, but making an effort to do so quietly so Vi didn’t get suspicious. Panic was starting to settle back in, her breathing got faster and her arms started shaking, when one of Jinx’s hands was suddenly on the back of her neck.

The touch was feather light, almost unnoticeable, but it was enough to pull Lux back and look at Jinx. There was still no deeper level of understanding in her expression.

“Don’t cry, baby.” She mumbled, a lazy smile that seemed to genuinely take all of Jinx’s effort crawling onto her face. “You’re… too pretty to cry. Mmm… Love how pretty you are, Blondie. Flashlight. Lux.”

A watery smile broke on her own face and she pulled Jinx into a hug, running her hands over the girl's hair. So precious, so kind and loving, but so reckless and fragile. In an instant this gorgeous thing had almost been taken from her. All the time they’d shared, it would have become a short stunted two months that would always only be two months. Her heart ached, deeper than she’d realized it could for someone like Jinx.

Lux knew what she had to do.

--

Emotional exhaustion must have kicked in at some point, because as Lux’s eyes started to flutter open, any hint of sunlight was gone from the sky at Jinx’s window. There was a rustling beside her, followed by a throaty grumbling, and she realized what was waking her up.

Jinx had sat up in bed, and was now rubbing a hand over her forehead, groaning in dissatisfaction. Lux sat up as well, and when Jinx’s eyes met her, they were almost completely rid of that pink hue to the sclera. Her veins were still visible, but were back to blue, and the light had returned to her spark’s eyes.

“Lux?” Jinx mumbled, looking around the room again. “The fuck happened?”

Before answering, Lux checked her phone again, and was amazed to find it was only 8:30. Jinx’s metabolism had apparently almost cut 30 minutes off of the time it was supposed to take for the Shimmer to filter out. Then again, she figured she shouldn’t be so surprised. Jinx was apparently a modern medical marvel, thanks to the procedure that’d been forced on her.

Lux didn’t waste another second, and finally having a lucid Jinx for the first time, she was pulled into a hug.

“Oh Jinx.” She started, trying to pull herself back together. “You were… I… I came over for our date but you weren’t answering your phone, so I went inside. When I got to your room you were on the ground, and there was a broken vial of shimmer. You weren’t responding… you…”

Realization seemed to hit Jinx, and she groaned and smacked herself on the head, but with little force. Probably as much as she could manage.

“Ah fuck. I got high and missed our date. Ugh shitballs. I’m sorry Blondie.”

Lux had to take a second to restrain herself from shouting ‘you almost fuckin died!!’ by shaking her head and squeezing Jinx tighter.

“No, no you didn’t just get high. Your heart was barely beating, you were confused, not responding… Jinx you overdosed.”

That seemed to catch her attention, and after a moment Jinx pulled away from Lux’s hug, her brow furrowed and her eyes wide.

“I… what?”

“You overdosed! Oh gods it was so scary, I thought you were gone Jinx, I thought you were going to-”

And then a new well of tears was starting to come down her face and Lux pulled Jinx in. This time Jinx hugged back, her arms tight around Jinx’s waist, and her head pressed into Lux’s neck. The feeling of her response was miraculous, her body an anchor for Lux to finally let her weight onto. She’d been so focused on getting through it and getting Jinx through it, she hadn’t really let herself stop working. Now, Jinx was here to hold her, to comfort her, to protect her. She wasn’t alone in this terror.

Jinx was whispering soothing words into her body as her hands rubbed and held, and slowly Lux managed to gain control of herself. She was alive, really truly alive.

“I’m sorry I scared you.” said Jinx as she pulled back again and stretched. “Today was rough, lots of voices and shit. I couldn’t get it to stop. I uh… shot up. Obviously. Guess I did it a bunch. Ummm my bad.”

Before Lux could respond, Jinx’s head suddenly perked up, and she scanned her room.

“Uh… hey… where’s my gun?”

Lux stared at her for a few long seconds.

“Your what?”

“My gun.” Jinx repeated, like it was nothing. “I had my gun out. Where’d I put it?”

“Why,” Lux started, trying her hardest not to scream, “did you have a gun on you?”

“I told you, I was hearin’ and seein’ shit. I thought someone was in the house, ergo, gun. Self defense and shit.”

Jinx was up now and combing the room. Pulling open drawers, digging through piles of clothes, getting everywhere she could. She found her phone in the process, which was open sitting on Lux’s texts. Explained why they had been read. The moment Jinx saw that she grimaced, and gave Lux an apologetic look.

Eventually her search took her under the bed, where she finally exclaimed ‘aha!’ and came back out. With a pistol in her hand. A full on, honest to gods handgun.

“How’d you get under there buddy?”

Without a word to the situation, Jinx suddenly climbed back into the bed and reached over the other side, moving something around with a click and a few taps. When she pulled back up, the gun was gone, and Jinx smiled at her like she hadn’t just been holding a fucking gun.

There had been too many things happening, and Lux didn’t have the capacity to deal with that too. All things considered, Jinx seemed to be taking it really well, and that was very concerning.

“Jinx?” She asked, once they settled back together. Jinx just eyed her to continue. “Are… are you okay?”

“Yeah, I’m fine.”

“But, you almost died.”

The girl rolled her eyes and scooted closer.

“Eh, ain’t the first time that’s happened. And what, you sayin’ you’d miss me?”

Then Jinx leaned in to kiss her, and Lux full on stopped it with a hand to the chest. Jinx’s eyes opened and gave her a quizzical glance.

This had gone on for too long. Too much anxiety, too much fear, too much moping around the issue and never addressing it. Lux couldn’t wait any longer.

“Well I’m not okay, Jinx. I almost lost you. Forever! Can you imagine how scared I was?”

Jinx only looked at her with a guilty grimace, but didn’t speak. Lux continued.

“I thought you were dead, I thought it was over. I had to lie for you Jinx! I was afraid if anyone found out you’d lose your scholarship. I lied to your sister . If someone lied to my brother about my wellbeing, he’d kill them. Do you not understand how big this is? I care about you. You’re important to me. I can’t… I can’t keep going on in this stupid game.”

Now Jinx adopted a look of confusion.

“What… what do you mean?”

She took a deep breath to steady herself, and held Jinx’s eyes. One hand laid gently in Jinx’s, and a reassuring squeeze was given right away. 

“This game that we’ve built for each other. We keep playing around, and taking our time, and fighting over silly things instead of dealing with our feelings. My feelings. The friendship just isn’t enough, only sex isn’t enough, being your school project partner isn’t enough. I thought I had all the time in the world, I knew you weren’t comfortable with relationships, I wanted to give you time and space to figure out how you felt. But all of that fell apart when I held you while you nearly died. I can’t wait any longer. I don’t want to be just your friend anymore Jinx. I want to be more than that. I want to be yours . I want you to be mine .”

The words settled in the cramped space of Jinx’s room, a slight hum from the house's heating and the smell of whatever Vi had been cooking filling the air. Fear crept through her veins as she watched Jinx’s expression change to a millions different things at once. Shock, embarrassment, guilt, a myriad more. Her heart was pounding in her chest, and she was about to try and take it back when Jinx spoke.

“You… want to like… date? Like, serious date? You wanna be my girlfriend?”

Lux took in a shaky breath and nodded.

The look on Jinx’s face slowly changed into a big genuine grin, which filled Lux with equal amounts of hope and anxiety at the same time.

Then Jinx laughed. Laughed . She had the gall to laugh like this was all some big horrible joke, but through her laughing she spoke.

“Oh my gods you have horrible taste.”

Surprise rang through her, but in seconds she was laughing too, though she didn’t exactly know why. They were both giggling messes as they sat on the bed, the nature of their situation funny in a way that only this tragic cosmic theater play could be.

She was struck from her laughter when Jinx suddenly pulled her in close and kissed her. Lux practically whimpered at the kiss, as it was new. It wasn’t filled with desire and lust like all their past kisses had been. It wasn’t a need for comfort, or safety, or attachment. It was soft. It was romantic. It was Jinx. Her Jinx. It was acceptance. It was a yes.

Lux reciprocated in seconds, arms looping around as her girlfriend kissed her with passionate care, as if Jinx was trying to kiss all of the awful things they’d been through tonight away. And the worst part was it was working.

Which Lux couldn’t have, given the stakes she needed to set. She gently pushed Jinx away and pulled back, holding Jinx’s eyes as a shudder ran through her.

“But if we’re doing this Jinx. If I’m going to be your girlfriend. If you’re going to be mine. There are boundaries we need to address. There are conditions.”

Jinx immediately looked nervous at that, but nodded with a swallow. Lux was glad she’d thought of these before going to sleep.

“If we’re dating you have to give up shimmer. I can’t almost lose you like that again, I can’t lose you at all. I won’t let it happen, and I’m not enabling it any longer. You need to get rid of all the shimmer you have now and never take anymore. If you do, even the slightest hit, we’re over.”

This clearly had been the one Jinx was anticipating, and she practically looked crestfallen.

“Blondie, it’s not that simple. I-I mean shimmer withdraw can be so bad you fucking die. I can’t… I can’t do it.”

Lux swallowed hard and nodded.

“Then we aren’t dating.”

“No!” Jinx yelled, putting her hands up immediately. Lux was surprised, and a little touched, at how fast Jinx had refused. “No, no I can’t wait anymore either Lux. God it’s been killing me how much I want to get to the romantic shit. And I fucking hate the romantic shit! It’s so bad! But I want it so fucking much with you. But… fuck uh… o-okay okay I’ll do it. I’m just… gonna need a lot of help and an eye on me. I’m not using hyperbole about death, if we’re not careful I could end up in a body bag.”

Lux swallowed hard, but nodded, thankful and hopeful that Jinx meant it.

“Okay, I’ll take care of you. Thank you. I’m sorry and I know you’re addicted, it just-”

“It’s fine Blondie, I get it. I… I’ve been trying to stop for a long time. This’ll just be that last push, I guess.”

With another intake of breath, Lux nodded.

“The other condition is that we have to keep this between us, and people we trust 100%. I talked to your sister, so I know she already knows, but no one who could spill. If my parents find out I’m dating a girl, let alone a trans girl, I’m gonna be forced to leave and go home.”

Jinx nodded there, with much more ease.

“Sorry I told my sis.”

Lux shook her head.

“It’s fine. I get it. I need to tell Garen already. I have no clue how he’s gonna take it, y’know?”

“Yeah. Am um… am I allowed to make a condition?”

A genuine look of surprise spread across Lux’s face, as she hadn’t considered Jinx would want to do that. It made sense, if she got to lay out her boundaries, Jinx should as well.

“Yes.”

“Okay… uh… this is gonna be kinda weird. If I do something bad, or make you upset, or make a mistake, can you promise not to run away without a word to me? I know I’m gonna fuck up no matter how hard I try not to, but like shimmer barred, can you not leave me with no warning.”

The hard exterior she’d been trying to build for these boundaries cracked a little, and a bit of sadness welled up in empathy.

“Jinx, I already told you I’m not gonna do that. Yes, I promise you.”

Jinx nodded, her hands threaded together and her thumbs squirming. There was something else.

“Jinx.”

Her face was bright red now, and her teeth were pressed hard into her bottom lip. Finally she spoke.

“I’ve got another one. Do you think we could switch from condoms to birth control meds? I’ve never like, done it with a girl without those before, that I know of, so I thought maybe it would make it kinda… more special. Fuck that’s super weird, sorry forget I brought it up.”

Shocked silence filled her for a few seconds as Jinx seemed to crumble in on herself, and this time it was Lux that couldn’t help but break out into laughter. Hefty bellowing cries of joy that made her stomach hurt and her eyes water as she lurched for breath. Jinx did not join in, and more than anything looked confused, which only made things funnier.

After a painful eternity of laughing, Lux threw her arms around Jinx for their thousandth embrace of the day.

“You’re such an idiot.” She laughed. “I love you so much.”

She felt the tension shoot up Jinx’s spine, through her arms and all across her body. Slowly it eased, and Jinx fell into the embrace, and mumbled softly.

“I love you too.”

Chapter Text

Jinx

--

For the first time since they’d begun having sex, Jinx was waking up in her own bed, but still with Lux nuzzled tightly into her arms. It was hard to blame her, given the circumstance. A yawn ripped from her jaw as she sat up best she could without dislodging Lux and stretched. The exhaustion that came with your body filtering that level of a foreign substance out was all encompassing, and Jinx was impressed she’d woken up before Lux. Although, it seemed that her overdose had actually had a far bigger effect on Lux than it had her.

Concerning when examined. Jinx didn’t like having the potential of letting people down, but there’s no getting out of it now. Her and Lux were dating. Officially girlfriends. Almost 4 Years of vowed removal from romance, only sex permitted, and here she was again.

To be fair, Lux wasn’t exactly your every day easy lay that Jinx usually found herself dancing towards. She was… different. In a way that was altogether unlike the way Jinx described herself as ‘different’ but still qualifying. She was like a star, in some ways. She shined so brightly, and at first glance you might see it and think it was just like all the others. But then you realize that star is a completely unique thing, an unrepeatable combination of gasses and space dust all thrown together in a kajillion degree frying pan to create unmitigated beauty.

Shit, this poetry stuff was easy.

Her musings must have been enough to wake Lux up, as she felt the warm body against hers suddenly squirm, followed by a groggy morning groan. Lux’s eyes fluttered open, barely but enough, and landed on Jinx’s. Her heart raced at the sight, and those gorgeous crystal blue oceans she called eyes nearly made Jinx spill all of the introspection she’d had on Lux’s nature.

“Hey.” Was all Jinx managed.

Lux smiled, and mumbled something almost like good morning, but every so slightly off. Instead of getting up, Lux snuggled in closer, resting her head onto Jinx’s chest, and pressing her ear in. It took Jinx a moment to realize she was listening to Jinx’s heartbeat. That shot another bolt of guilt through her. If her pulse was as low as Lux claimed, she didn’t blame her for wanting to be close to it, now that it was strong.

Lux spoke up again before that guilt managed to spiral.

“What time is it? We have to get to class by 11.”

Jinx went to reach for her phone, but stopped halfway.

“You really think it’s a good idea for us to attend our classes after yesterday?”

Lux, ever the good girl, opened her mouth to protest Jinx’s suggestion, but she closed her mouth before voicing any. While Jinx did kind of just want an excuse to skip, it was a legitimate point. Probably more for Lux than for Jinx. Pushing it further was needed.

“I mean, have you ever missed a single class this semester? Surely you can afford to miss one single day and just spend it here with me. Maybe we could even hang out with my sister, have you two like properly meet. A warm up for when I eventually have to meet your scary ass brother.”

Lux giggled, which made Jinx shiver the way it always did, and she shook her head.

“He’s not that scary, he’s just a bit intimidating. I doubt you have to worry about that for a bit. But, I suppose taking one day off wouldn’t be all that bad. Besides.” Lux leaned up from her perch, and with little warning pressed a slow, sucking kiss into Jinx’s neck, before sliding her way up to Jinx’s ear and whispered. “We should celebrate our new relationship.”

A jolt ran through Jinx that seemed to light her nerves on fire, goosebumps rising from her arms as another distinctive body part rose from beneath her boxers. Jinx swallowed, hard, clearing her throat twice before actually managing to get any words out.

“Uh… yeah. Yeah that sounds good.”

The hum of approval that Lux gave echoed into her neck, and her girlfriend moved herself to straddle Jinx’s lap, pushing the blankets back. One hand was already behind her head, threading into Jinx’s hair and leading her, until her own lips were led to the bare soft flesh of Lux’s shoulders. It was a silent command, one they both had become very familiar with.

Mark.

Jinx obeyed, running her teeth softly over skin before pushing down, hard enough to disrupt the blood vessels beneath the surface and leave a big recognizable bruise on Lux. Lux’s breath caught in her throat at the bite, and Jinx all but finished in that very moment.

She might’ve even, if there wasn’t suddenly a knock at her door.

“Jinx? Lux? I don’t know if you guys are up but I'm about to make some pancakes. Want any?”

Both of them froze, pulling back slightly to make eye contact, before frustration welled up into her chest.

“You could’ve just texted me.” Jinx grumbled, adjusting in place so that Lux’s weight wasn’t directly on her bulge.

“I did, you didn’t answer. I figured you guys might be asleep.”

There was a pregnant pause from all parties, and enough that Vi clearly understood what was happening. There was something between a sigh and a chuckle from the other side of the door, and Vi spoke again.

“Look I know you guys are honey moon phasing and all, but you don’t have to spend every second of the day boning.” The vocal acknowledgement from a third party was enough to make Lux’s face bright red, which was adorable if not also deeply embarrassing. “But, whatever, you two do what you gotta do but if you aren’t downstairs in the next 30 minutes I’m not making you pancakes.”

Then just like that, Vi’s audible footsteps carried down the stairs.

Before either of them could properly react, Kuro made a deep noise from in his terrarium, sort of like scales rubbing together, and Jinx turned towards him.

“I agree, Kuro, that was incredibly rude of her.”

Rather than laugh, Lux groaned, which really was quite fair of her.

--

6 Years Prior

“What exactly did you think was going to happen?”

Jinx hated that tone. It was the tone Silco used when he was more disappointed in her than angry. Angry was better, because it meant that it was the first reaction. And, if they talked about it, the anger would fade quickly when Jinx explained herself and Silco would apologize for raising his voice.

But disappointed? That meant he had thought it through with that cold logic of his. There was no convincing him what she did wasn’t so bad when he had that tone. Which meant she had to mope her way through it like she was still a baby.

“I don’t know it just- I thought it was fine.”

“ You thought it was fine .” he replied sharply, standing in the living room with his arms behind his back, patently blocking the TV. “What part of running away from Sevika in the middle of an operation, on your own, completely alone, did you think was fine ?”

“I-I can handle myself.” Her stammers weren’t helping, and she hated herself for still not being able to talk right. “I saw someone suspicious, I thought they were a narc, so I ran after them.”

“Jinx, you’re still a child. You’re barely 16, when you’re with Sevika on these jobs, you have to understand that I’m not sending you there to fight. You are learning our business, you aren’t there to shoot someone. You could’ve gotten hurt, you’re lucky Sevika found you so quickly. We work a dangerous line, the chem barons beneath me would revel at a chance to cripple our industry for a leg up. And you, Jinx, are my most invaluable asset. You’re my daughter, if I lost you, all this would be nothing. I’d fall apart. And the Nation of Zaun needs me at the head to stay relevant, the Piltover Council won’t listen if a parasite like Finn or Renata were in charge of my enterprise.”

Jinx didn’t have anything to say to that, she just curled up further into the couch, hands around her knees. She watched the tension in Silco’s shoulder’s drop, and he pinched the bridge of his hawkish nose. After a moment he sighed and took a seat beside her. She leaned her head onto his shoulder without even asking, and he wrapped an arm around her. He was always warm despite how thin and waifish he was. That was something the two of them had in common, despite sharing no blood. They were both the runts of their packs, malnourished from poverty yes, but also born with smaller frames. Not like Vander. Or Vi. She had always thought that made her weak when she was still a little girl. Silco had helped her realize that their brains were what made them so dangerous, not their brawn.

“Please understand.” He said, softer than his tone had been before. He always did that, softened his voice at the halfway point of a lecture. He knew Jinx was likely to panic if he didn’t control his tone. He’d learned that lesson within the first two months. “I’m not chastising you for the sake of it. I’m not picking at little details to have a reason to be upset. I’m upset because I care about you and your safety, and bringing you into our business is very, very dangerous.”

“I know.” Jinx whispered. Even if she was still afraid that he might suddenly decide she wasn’t a worthwhile daughter and leave her out on the streets. She loved him as much as she loved her own father, what little she could remember of him, and just as much as Vander. But with that love came a terrible expectation. She always messed things up. She always Jinxed things. Eventually she was going to ruin this too.

“You’re in your own head again.” Silco spoke, which made Jinx realize she’d been silent for a few minutes. It wasn’t an accusation, just a statement. She was so grateful to him, for accepting her as she was. No one had ever truly done that before.

“I’ll do better next time.” Was what she settled on. Silco pressed a kiss to the crown of her head.

“I know.” He said. Then he reached over to grab the remote and resume what she’d been watching. He smiled when he realized what it was. “This is your favorite part, isn’t it? The Last Charge of the Rohirrim.”

Jinx smiled, and nodded. “And I like when Shelob shows up.” Silco laughed softly.

“I do love the special effects. They did a good job with these, going off the books. Even if it isn’t 100% accurate.”

“You say that eeevery time.”

That made Silco laugh a little more.

“I suppose I can’t help but repeat myself. Call me too oldschool for my own good.”

--

4 Years Prior

“So, this is the place. What do you think?”

Jinx took a few tentative steps inside. Ekko’s apartment was small. Much smaller than her and Silco’s apartment under The Last Drop. Though, she supposed that wasn’t going to be her apartment for much longer. Given that Silco was dead.

She had to immediately turn her thoughts away from that subject. She’d start crying again.

“It’s nice.” She lied. Ekko chuckled a bit, running a hand along her back.

“Eh, you don’t have to pretend. It’s not much, I know. But we can work upward, y’know? Maybe I can try and find a new job, with more hours. I mean I doubt the Firelights are really gonna take off anytime soon. Two incomes, we can make it.”

Jinx didn’t reply, and instead explored the small space very briefly. Part of it was that she couldn’t look Ekko in the eye after he talked like that. The Firelights were his dream, a punk band centered as a community piece for Zaun, to organize, to protect each other, both from Piltover and from the remnants of Silco’s business. Crime lords carving up all the fresh territory for their new little gangs. An empire Silco had spent a life building. One Jinx was meant to inherit, dashed to pieces in front of her.

And Ekko was willing to give up his dream for her. The very thing that had broken Silco’s dream. How could she be worth that? She wasn’t, she never was. How could all these people be so delusional? She wasn’t worth the tears cried, or the blood shed, or the money spent.

Ekko’s hands at her hip stopped her thought process. Then he leaned in close and kissed her bare shoulder.

“It’s gonna be okay.” He whispered. “I’ll do whatever I can for you.”

She was tired of people telling her it was going to be okay when it wasn’t. But she didn’t argue. How could she, when Ekko was so willing to give for her? She turned then to look him in the eyes. He smiled being so close, and she saw the way his eyes shined a little bit. A childhood crush that had bubbled back up. That’s what he had told her. He’d had feelings for her long before she ever realized. And the look in his eyes was real. He genuinely thought he felt that way.

Another delusion. Jinx didn’t understand. She didn’t feel it, never really had. Not for anyone. She certainly thought he was handsome, and she didn’t mind the way he touched her, the way he made her feel good. But whatever deep, insular, passionate reaction looking at her seemed to produce, she didn’t feel it. But she owed it to him. It made sense to be his girlfriend after everything. She even liked the idea of being his girlfriend. In some strange sort of way. Not the way Ekko wanted though, really. That was what had taught Jinx a fundamental truth she had intended to maintain until her dying days, however soon they might have been.

Romance wasn’t real.

--

Present

In the end Lux had felt far too awkward with Vi’s statement to do anything, so the two of them showered and changed for the day. Only, Lux hadn’t been planning on staying the night, so she wore a pair of Jinx’s gym shorts that fit her and Jinx’s Armordillo Festival hoodie (which was very convenient for hiding the hickey Jinx had just given her). It was strange to think that after years of deciding not to let anyone press an expectation onto her (Vi didn’t count, that was family after all) here she was, sitting at the kitchen Island next to her girlfriend, with her sister across from them.

It was lucky that the one person who knew about their relationship in an official capacity was in front of them. And that it was Vi. There was no one she trusted more in the world, she’d understand not to talk idly about their relationship. The pancakes were amazing, Vi was a fantastic cook afterall, and she’d been so hungry after waking up from the overdose that for a while she actually forgot she was with the two of them. But Vi’s voice snapped her back into reality.

“So, what time are your classes again?”

Jinx froze with her 3rd pancake partly in her mouth, and her eyes darted to Lux. Lux did the same thing, which was far too suspicious. There was hardly any point in hiding it anyway.

“We’re actually uh, not going to classes today.” She said after swallowing. Lux looked like revealing this info was going to give her a heart attack, teacher’s pet that she was.

“Oh yeah?” Vi replied, taking a sip of coffee. “Can you afford to skip today?”

Lux took control of the situation before Jinx could say another word.

“Actually the class we share today our professor doesn’t count attendance towards our grade. And, Jinx and I got a near perfect grade on our first project of the semester. We’re more than on track. And I haven’t missed a single day this semester so I doubt my other professors will care.” She pointedly didn’t mention the rest of Jinx’s classes, which Jinx also didn’t mention. As she had C’s in all of them and had missed way more classes than she should. “But, honestly we’re both set for midterms. Don’t worry, I won’t let Jinx fail any of her classes.”

Vi looked honestly impressed, whereas Jinx probably held an expression of dread. They had made no such agreement, but by the look in Lux’s eyes, she fully meant it.

“Well damn. Good thing you’re here. She certainly won’t learn to be disciplined with just me around.”

Lux laughed at that, which seemed to fully win Vi over. She liked making people laugh. Lux was 100% winning the first impression with the sibling contest.

Even still, Jinx couldn’t help but groan.

“Stop talking like you’re my mom dude. You’re my sister.”

Vi took another long sip of her coffee, raising her eyebrows and giving a side eye to nothing as if to say ‘you sure about that?’ which made Jinx wish they were sitting at a table so she could kick Vi’s shins. She settled for ripping off a bit of a napkin leftover from some takeout, making a paper football, and flicking it directly into Vi’s face.

Vi, professional boxer that she was, let it hit her square in the nose. She moved to jump up from her barstool, which had Jinx making the same motion, inevitably preparing to be picked up and suplexed into the couch. Apparently Vi decided maybe they should be a bit better behaved with Lux around, she looked a little startled at the fight that was about to break out.

Instead, Vi made the ‘I’ve got me eyes on you’ motion, a proverbial mad-dog, before she sat back down and addressed Lux.

“Sorry, we play-fight a lot around here.”

“More like play-slaughter.” Jinx mumbled, since she rarely won their wrestling matches. She still always rose to the challenge, because it would be totally lame if she didn’t try to wrestle her 5’9” jacked sister. Clearly it put Lux a bit more at ease, by the way the tension in her shoulders dropped.

“Not used to that sort of thing, huh?” Vi more stated than asked.

Lux shook her head. “Not at all. I mean I have a brother but he’s more than a few years older than me. Plus he’s huge, I don’t think I’d have much of a chance play-fighting. Not to mention, something like that would be ‘unbecoming’ of a young woman in my station.”

“Pssh, that’s ridiculous.” Jinx said, plopping her head down onto the island and twirling her fork in her hand. “We don’t live in the fucking regency era.”

“How do you even know what regency is? You nearly failed your history class last year.” Vi cut in.

“Video games.”

Vi tipped her head as if to say ‘fair’ and turned her attention back to Lux.

“If it makes you feel any better, or safer, you really don’t have to worry about how you act here. Zaunite hospitality is so legendary because we don’t give a shit about most things.”

Jinx cut in to say “Just don’t be a dick.”

“Even if you were a dick, I’d still probably cook you dinner. But I’d call you a dick while I did it.”

Lux smiled, and laughed very quietly before speaking again. “Thank you. Jinx has proven that to me pretty cohesively.” There was a clear fondness in her tone, which had made Jinx’s head spin just a bit, though she did her best not to let it show. “But I appreciate it so much. Back where I’m from, I don’t think I could ever show… this … side of me.” Then she reached over to take Jinx’s hand, and her meaning was very clear.

Vi hummed with pained understanding.

“Where are you from anyway? If you don’t mind me asking.”

“Demacia. I’m uh- well my name is Luxanna Crownguard. The Crownguards are a very long standing family in Demacian history, drawing back to when Demacia was still a monarchy. Our family is literally of noble lineage, we were defenders of the crown, hence the name. Even now my parents are important politicians and business owners. And, well, it’s sort of expected of me to follow in their footsteps. My brother and I both.”

Jinx and her had spoken of it before, at least briefly, often when they were lying in bed and Lux was far more willing to talk about what her life back home was. It made Jinx hate the Crownguards, really, for how Lux had been repressed and kept away from the real world, that it was only through Jinx that she’d recently been allowed to explore who she really was. And frankly, Jinx wasn’t a very safe or healthy avenue to do so.

Vi whistled with a bit of wonder, running a hand through her hair.

“Guess that explains the fancy dress.”

Jinx froze, her eyes darted to Vi, then to Lux, who was similarly frozen like a cat spotted somewhere it shouldn’t be. Then her eyes darted back to Vi, who was realizing her mistake.

“Jinx showed you the pictures with my dress?”

Lux and Vi, despite talking to each other, were both looking at Jinx, because there were two very different misunderstandings happening. Vi thought that she had spilled the beans about Jinx’s surprise outfit for the gala, which was sort of true. Lux was talking about the other pictures that featured that dress, which were for no one’s eyes but Jinx, which she had very much not shown to Vi.

“Yeah, I showed her the picture when you sent it. Y’know, just cause I was excited about it, and told her about us by that point.”

Lux and Vi, who both thought they were covering for completely different situations, talked a little too nonchalantly for the next minute or two. When Vi finally left to go do some grocery shopping, Jinx was practically rolling on the floor laughing, while Lux was dying of the potential embarrassment she thought she’d narrowly missed.

--

The rest of the week passed without much event, as Jinx prepared the final parts of her presentation for the symposium. It was a miracle she got it ready, as she and Lux were nearly inseparable for that week, enjoying the thrills of their new relationship, in its official capacity. They were going on dates, staying at Jinx’s house and Lux’s dorm in equal parts, attached by the hip (in more ways than one) for most of each day. That Thursday marked the first half of the Autumn-winter semester ending and the start of their week and a half long Autumn break. And that Sunday evening of their break, the Kindered’s Eve Harvest Gala was hosted at the academy, and alongside it the Piltover Academy Science and Mathematics Symposium, where a number of interesting things happened. That night was the first night that the Shimmer withdrawal hit.

Chapter Text

Lux

--

The preparations for the Gala, Lux found, were very stressful. It wasn’t the first of these events that she’d attended before, and it certainly wouldn’t be the last, but this one was different. Before she’d still been young, and never without another Crownguard somewhere in the crowd. Here there would be none of her family nearby, she was to represent the interest of the Crownguard’s alone. And yet, this wasn’t really what made Lux nervous. No, at the end of the day she could play the foolish young girl her parents thought she was and get out of any real responsibility by saying she ‘tried really hard but it was all so intimidating and it was so scary without Garen or Auntie Tianna or you, Father.’

No, the real source of her stress was that she and Jinx were now a couple, and they were both attending the event. They had briefly talked about it, in between one evening they had spent a particularly long time in Lux’s bed (so much so that they had gotten a noise complaint, which made Jinx laugh so hard Lux thought they might get another one). They obviously weren’t going to be public with their affections, but would still spend as much of their free time together as they could, both of them agreed with that. It was completely feasible that Jinx and Lux had become friends while sharing a class, since this was the truth, and so it would make sense for Lux to be around one of her only close friends at the Academy. There was nothing suspicious about it, they could even share a dance or two during the Gala, it wasn’t unheard of for close friends to do this for the fun of it.

That didn’t erase the anxieties, and even the frustrations that came with their secrecy. Lux was finding that the more time she spent with Jinx, the more she was escaping the shells of her previous life. She would even say that she was becoming adventurous , far more willing to explore new things. Food, culture, sex, all of it was suddenly so exciting once she realized just how cooped up she had been. That wasn’t to say it was easy to make the new leaps and bounds, she often found herself hitting walls of shame, embarrassment, nervous fear of the unknown. But Jinx was always there to ease her into it, because she trusted her.

Gods, she trusted Jinx. To think that just a few months ago she was so dismayed that she and Jinx had been chosen to be partners for a group project. Now she couldn’t even imagine her life without that sweet little chaos she’d let sneak into her heart. There was still the distant fear that they were moving a little too fast with their relationship, but all and all Lux tried to ignore it. It felt far too good to not enjoy it to its fullest extent.

She checked her hair for the 3rd time, as though she hadn’t meticulously styled it for half an hour exactly to how she wanted it to look. She very much hoped Jinx liked it, after all she already knew how Jinx felt about her evening gown. Then came makeup, nothing incredible, just the basics that she knew made her shine. Though she did have to take extra care to conceal the marks on her neck and her shoulders. Thankfully Jinx had taught her that, since she did the same trick from her track marks.

Getting her clutch, Lux took one final look in the mirror, one final deep breath, and left the dorm. By her father’s arranging, there was a car waiting for her in the parking lot, a small black thing where her driver, a Crownguard man flown out to Piltover with a rental no doubt, waited silently. It wasn’t exactly an hour drive to the Academy audience hall where the Gala and Symposium were being held, but it was far enough that she couldn’t walk there in her nice heels, and she didn’t exactly want to take the campus shuttle in her ancestral Crownguard evening dress either. The one she had fully soiled by sending those pictures to Jinx dear gods.

“Evening, Miss.” her driver said as she sat down inside.

She just smiled at him from the rear view, and he pulled out and into the inter-campus roads. It only took 5 minutes to get there, but she realized in moments it was going to take much longer to actually get in. Cars were being directed all around as from her window she watched dignitaries, politicians, lawmakers, industrialists, and every variety of wealthy person on this end of the continent were making their way from their various limos and chauffeurs to the front entrance. She sighed with another bout of anxiety, wishing Jinx were here in the car with her, even just to hold her hand.

In the end it took 30 minutes for the driver to pull up to the stairs, and for Lux to exit. Thankfully this wasn’t an event for popular culture, so even though she noticed a few reporters, interviews, and camera people around, it wasn’t exactly a red carpet. Most everyone walked in unbothered, though of them seemed caught up. Notably, Councilwoman Medarda was speaking with an interviewer from the Piltover Spyglass, and beside her Professor Talis stood as well. She had her arm around Professor Talis’, which seemed oddly familiar considering that she knew Professor Viktor and Professor Talis were a couple. Maybe they were open? A triad? Jinx had only recently taught her these terms.

Regardless she made her way up the stairs and into the hall itself. Immediately a valet was there to take her coat and hand her a ticket for its later return. The lobby was littered with even more people in fancy suits and fancy dresses, but thankfully only two Lux immediately recognized. Professor Viktor and Aibhlinn were in the corner of the lobby, him in a very sharp shirt and waistcoat with the academy colors bold, her in a very flattering slit dress, her athletic blades now swapped with simple sleek black prosthetics that were almost gave the image of stockings when they met her bare thighs. Gods, why were the women she played volleyball with all so stunning?

The two of them were focused intently on Aibhlinn’s phone, which she held up for viewing, and by the way their responses seemed to be short and rapid, they were most likely discussing their work. That wasn’t very surprising, Caitlyn had told her they were both workaholics after all. Still, Viktor noticed her after a moment and smiled, waving her over. She smiled and waved back, a bit awkwardly before walking to meet them.

“You’re looking lovely this evening, Miss Lux.” Viktor said.

“I could say the same to both of you.” Lux replied.

Viktor laughed, shifting his weight onto a fancy looking cane with a clock embedded into the topper, rather than his usual functional crutch.

“Always the charmer, it’s good to see you here. I didn’t realize you’d be attending, but I suppose I shouldn’t be surprised. Ah, I should introduce the two of you. Lux this is-”

“We’ve met.” Aibhlinn cut in, her voice as low and sharp as ever. “We play on the same volleyball team.”

“Oh.” Viktor said. “I didn’t realize you were an Athlete, Miss Lux. Are you involved with the Academy’s athletics?”

“No no, no I just play for fun, I’m not quite good enough for college sports.”

“Ah, I see. Well, I don’t mean to cut pleasantries short, but Aibhlinn and I were discussing some important business. I don’t think I’ve seen Miss Jinx arrive yet, but she should be attending. Though, knowing her I wouldn’t be surprised if she’s decided to be fashionably late.”

Jinx smiled, feeling a bit of confidence return being able to talk with people she was at least familiar with.

“You know professor, some people in high society circles might consider it rude that you and Aibhlinn are working at a formal event like this.”

Viktor laughed, shaking his head at the joke.

“I think you’ll find it’s a common quality among undercity denizens not to care what the rich and prestigious do or think. Jinx isn’t the only one who has a bone to pick with authority, you know. You think two poor disabled academics like Aibhlinn and I are popular up here in the first place?”

“Viktor’s still being polite. We don’t give a fuck, Lux.”

Both of them laughed at that, and with a wave Lux left the two to their work and headed inside the audience hall proper.

The music of a small string orchestra filled the space, as once again she was transported to the world of her family. The atmosphere was smoky, no doubt due to a group of men in the corner of the hall puffing on long fat cigars, laughing at the joke of a heavy set bearded man. Long tables flanked either side of the enormous hall covered in glasses and plates and other kinds of refreshments, and a large glass dome towered above them, painted and styled with Piltovan mythological figures. In the center of the hall there was already dancing, slow and respectable, and all around that circle were the guests, suits and dresses and other fine clothing of many colors and make littered around, champagne glasses clinking and lower murmurs of conversation and laughing the dominating energy.

She’d always felt so unsure at these events, most of the time she attached herself to the side of the people she knew who attended with her, friends or family or what have you. Here, at least until Jinx arrived, she had no such luxury. Already she began to feel like a fish out of water just standing in the entrance way, so Lux took a breath in and once again entered society.

Here, with a much larger density of people, she did recognize some figures. A wealthy grocery CEO here, an up and coming province legislator there, but no one influential enough from Demacia to garner close relations with the Crownguards. She went up to each one she recognized to give basic pleasantries, but after the first 10 or so she already felt herself begin to grow tired of it. That was, luckily, when she ran into Ezreal.

He was leaning against one of the concession tables, a glass of champagne in his hands, apparently stringing along a few older looking guests with some story, probably about his latest excavation. It was strange, she’d noticed this in their brief time together, but Ezreal was far better at socially entertaining older adults than anyone close to their age. Boyish charm, maybe?

It was then that he noticed her as well, and he lit up, to Lux’s very slight dismay. Then again, at least she knew Ezreal, that was better than continuing to wander around alone and ‘representing the interests of the Crownguard family.’ He quickly spun an apology to his small audience, and rushed his way over to her. He was also wearing a suit of academy colors, white red and black, that admittedly fit him rather nicely. His hair was styled more than usual, the product obvious but not overbearing. He was handsome, objectively speaking at least.

“Hey!” He said with a big dumb smile on his face.

“Hey.” Lux replied with an attempt at enthusiasm.

“I didn’t realize you were coming.”

“I could say the same to you, you’re not from any of the Piltover houses, right?”

“That’s right.” He said, reaching over at a passing worker to pluck a champagne flute and hand it to her. She took, a little reluctantly. She’d wanted to wait until Jinx arrived to have a drink. Oh well. “I’m giving a presentation for the symposium. Even though I’m not technically a STEM student, they chose a few social science students as well, so archaeology is the perfect choice. According to Professor Morgana, at least, she recommended me.”

“Cool.” Lux said, and she did mean it. If there were some things about Ezreal that didn’t really annoy her, his clear and obvious passion for his field was one of them. She was envious of that passion, even. Envious in the same way she was of Jinx, or Seraphine, or any of the people she knew who had that deep passion.

Speaking of, before the two of them could talk anymore, Lux suddenly had someone running into her and throwing their arms around her, and all at once Lux’s vision was filled with pink.

“Oh my gods Lux! You’re here, yay!” Seraphine hugged her far too familiarly for their level of friendship, Lux thought, but her cheer was too infectious to be embarrassed.

“Hi Seraphine.” She said, managing to peel her off. She was wearing a gold colored gown, open at the back and incredibly gracious with her assets. If she were to be as blunt as Jinx, her tits looked incredible. 

“I had no idea you were attending, we should have totally come together! We could have gotten ready together and everything, I really could have used a hand with my hair, curling this is not an easy feat. Oh, hi, sorry who are you?”

Seraphine’s attention turned to Ezreal, who seemed a little deflated that his conversation was suddenly sidetracked.

“Seraphine, this is Ezreal, he’s an archaeology student. Ezreal, this is Seraphine, she’s a music student.”

“Ah ah, I’m an audio engineering and sound production/music theory double major. It’s a science you know, I’m not just a performer.” She corrected, with an incredibly cute pout.

“Hey, nice to meet you.” Ezreal said, holding his hand out to shake. She did with enthusiasm, before looking around and furrowing her brow.

“Where’s your girl, Lux? Jinx? I think her presentation is right after mine.”

Lux froze at suddenly having Jinx referred to as ‘her girl.’ It was an accurate descriptor, but not one they were public with. Then again, Seraphine had very clearly noticed the tension between the two of them when they helped her with her cat. She was just about to correct Seraphine, when Seraphine interrupted, speaking excitedly.

“Oh hey there she is! Great timing.” Then waved wildly.

Lux and Ezreal turned to look at the same time, and all at once Lux’s heart stopped in her chest, and every particle of breath left her lungs. There Jinx was alright. Jinx, in a very flattering Noxian style suit, tight and fitting to match her androgynous form. Her pants and jacket were a deep navy blue, with gold cufflinks, and her waistcoat was a gorgeous patterned white with gold buttons. A gold tie completed the off-white shirt beneath, and her steps clicked with incredibly expensive looking black oxfords, perfectly shined. Her hair was braided as usual, but there were little gold clips and ornaments that Lux wasn’t familiar with that wrapped around at different points, causing the light to glint off of them now and then. She had the faintest black eyeliner that matched her eyebags and gave her the impression of a playboy debonair, comfortably walking through a smoky gambling hall. And as she approached Lux realized, with both horror and delight, that her suit matched Lux’s dress perfectly. Crownguard colors.

Her father was going to kill her. She was going to die from how sexy Jinx was before he had the chance.

“I’m not too late, am I?” Jinx said as she stepped closer, moving to obviously check an expensive looking wristwatch. “No, just on time.”

“Hi Jinx!” Seraphine beamed, giving her a quick hug. Jinx took in stride, obviously more than happy once again to let Seraphine press her body close against her, which only made Lux a little jealous.

“Hey, it’s been a while. Seraphine, right?”

“Yep, that’s right. Gods you look handsome, all dressed up nice.”

Jinx, clearly reveling in the attention, smiled and shrugged.

“My old man and my sister taught me a thing or two about style, I guess. Hey Ezreal, what’s up?”

Ezreal, who was just as surprised at a Jinx who had cleaned up just as nicely as he had, cleared his throat, and put his hand forward for a fist bump.

“Hey. I’m uh, looking forward to your presentation tonight. Chemical applications to the modern engine, right?”

Jinx nodded, accepting the first bump, with just the slightest hint of peacockish energy. She was doing this intentionally.

“Yep, it’s gonna be a blast. Literally , don’t sit too close to the front row in case something goes wrong. Sorry, I didn’t check what yours was. Sera, yours is… The mathematics of Pop music, yeah?”

Seraphine nodded excitedly.

“Oh my gods yes! Yours is right after mine, I’m literally sooo excited.”

Lux was quickly realizing she may be one of the only students present who wasn’t here for a presentation with the symposium. That only made her feel a little incompetent standing in a group with the prodigies of Piltover.

As the conversation started to flow between them, Jinx paused for a second to make eye contact with Lux. Her expression was a smug satisfaction, and she winked. Lux’s heart skipped a beat, this was just too much.

“Do you guys mind if I have a quick word with Jinx? Sorry, it’s about our civil engineering class.”

Seraphine rolled her eyes.

“It’s a gala, you know, you don’t have to spend it talking about our school work.”

Lux laughed, but still took Jinx by the arm and pulled her away from them, placing her untouched champagne flute on the table. Jinx didn’t fight, instead let herself be led out of the audience hall and into a more secluded and empty hallway. She still wore that stupid, pretty, smug expression. 

“Did I surprise you?”

Lux had to take a second and press a gloved hand to her head, taking a deep breath in and then out. 

“You are… so incredible Jinx, and yet so stupid. You’re wearing my family colors, do you realize that?”

Jinx’s smug expression dropped considerably, and her eyes darted side to side.

“W-Wha I mean, I- I guess not no, I just wanted to match you.”

Lux pinched the nose of her brow, taking another deep breath in, and a deep breath out.

“This dress, and a lot of my evening dresses, are specifically made for my family. That means with our colors, gold and blue. It’s a signifier, like the crest on my brooch. It has meaning!”

Jinx, visibly defensive, scoffed and looked away from Lux.

“That’s ridiculous, your family doesn’t have a monopoly on the color blue. I mean, the Piltover Enforcer colors are also blue and gold, like what? Besides, I’m not in Demacia, I’m not at some stupid ball where that matters. I'm a student of the academy, a good one at that since they fuckin asked me to be here, and these are the colors that I wanted to wear. Who cares if we match?”

Lux wanted to argue more, and frustration bubbled in her chest as she took another deep breath in. As she let the breath leave, Jinx’s hands were suddenly slotting into her hips. Lux looked up at her, and Jinx was smiling, eyes hooded.

“Come on Blondie, I just wanted to surprise you with something nice. Stop thinking about all that shit. Tonight is for us, okay? No one else. Except, maybe Seraphine because holy shit she’s fine.”

That did get Lux to laugh, but when she didn’t reply right away, Jinx squeezed her hips and leaned in close to whisper in Lux’s ear.

“But not nearly as fine as you are.”

Heat bloomed through her, top to bottom, and Lux hid her face into the lapel of Jinx’s jacket. She could feel the way Jinx was grinning.

“It’s taking every inch of will not rip this off of you right here, you know. I’m still thinking about those pictures you sent in it. Don’t worry, I’ll send you plenty in the suit.”

“It is a very nice suit.” Lux said. “Where did you even get it? There’s no way you could afford this.”

“Hell no I couldn’t afford it. Vi knows a tailor in the Promenade, and he owed her a favor for her running off a gang trying to extort him. I told her that we were going to this together and when I showed her your dress she told me she was gonna get me an outfit. So, here I am. Custom made to match.”

Despite her fears and frustrations, Lux loved the fact that Jinx was wearing this, and now her own arms found Jinx’s back, leaning into her and taking a deep breath of that iconic scent she loved so much that seemed to cling around Jinx this close. 

“Sorry for freaking out.” Lux whispered.

“It’s okay. Sorry for not telling you, I thought you would have liked if it was a surprise.”

“I do like it, honestly. You know how I can be with unexpected things though.”

“Yeah, sorry. I should have thought about it.”

“It’s okay. You’re right, I should just relax, and try to enjoy this.”

Jinx smiled, and pressed a kiss against her forehead, and Lux hummed in satisfaction. She loved those little signs of affections that were always too romantic for what they were before. Now, they were together, for real, and nothing was beyond them.

“While we’re alone, this is the weirdest thing but, do you know if Seraphine is trans?”

Lux furrowed her brow and pulled away to look at Jinx.

“Uh, I don’t know. I didn’t think so, but I couldn’t tell with you. I’m not really the person to ask. Why?”

Jinx hummed with a minor frustration and shook her head.

“It’s crazy but I just feel like I’ve met her before. Something about her face and the way she laughs reminds me of this boy I used to play with when I was real young, before I became a girl. That might be ridiculous though, It’s probably just a coincidence. If that is her, holy shit what a doll. Call me jealous but I wish I got growth like that, like fuck.”

Lux laughed a bit, deciding it was her turn to be smooth.

“Oh, but I like your tits, so much Jinx, those piercings are so cute.”

She watched Jinx react, exhaling and shifting on her oxfords.

“Alright, enough of that, we should probably get back out there, right? My presentation’s not for an hour still, we can get a drink, or dance, or something.”

With that, the two of them were out back into the hall, standing close, and Lux wished deeply that Jinx would wrap an arm around to rest her hand at the small of Lux’s back. That would certainly get attention though, more than an apparent coincidence in outfits. Such a damn shame.

The number of people nearby that they knew dwindled significantly though as they lost track of Ezreal and Seraphine, and for a while they drifted aimlessly together, having a drink each and Lux giving some more fake pleasantries to people who recognized her. She introduced Jinx each time as the student representing the Academy’s engineering department, but that only ever led to a nod or a ‘lovely to meet you’ or other fake introduction. Jinx didn’t seem to care.

It was then that Lux spotted someone she actually knew from home, and her face lit up as she saw deep blue hair done up nicely in two long trails that led to seafoam green ombrés, and an almost radiant lavender dress with stars flecked into the fabric.

Sona Buvelle saw her at the same moment, and her expression lit up. She smiled brightly and waved a hello, and Lux excitedly waved back. Lux tugged Jinx towards her, who looked with confusion, and Sona waited patiently with her arms crossed. A moment later was when she noticed Quinn, stoic as ever, in a black suit that made her far less noticeable standing a hair behind her. It wasn’t surprising, as Sona was an incredibly accomplished musician adopted into a wealthy Demacian family, Quinn had been her bodyguard for years now. Sona was 8 years her senior, but they’d been friends even when Lux was a teenager. One of the few people Lux actually liked spending time with at fancy events.

And, Lux had realized this only recently, she completely had a crush on her. The way she looked up to Sona was clearly that of a baby gay, and now with that understanding it was a little embarrassing to see her again now. She wasn’t tall, maybe close to Jinx’s height, plus sized in a way that made her beauty hard to look away from. Lux thought she was utterly enchanting, and the dress wasn’t helping. Quinn was more the opposite, lanky and thin in a way that made her intimidating, like if you put an entire foot onto Jinx’s height, but fed her properly. They had never talked much, but as Lux understood she was an accomplished military ranger, who after being discharged from service was bought by the Buvelles for a private security contract. 

It’s been so long Lux. Sona signed, a smile still bright on her face.

“Far too long, it’s so great to see you.”

Jinx, as Lux figured from just one look, did not know sign language, so Lux quickly spoke again.

“Jinx this is Sona Buvelle, she’s a pianist, she and I have been close friends for a few years now. Sona this is Jinx, she’s a student here at the Academy, and she’s doing a presentation for the symposium.”

Sona waved just as friendly to Jinx, who cleared her throat and spoke.

“Hi, nice to meet you. Y-You're not like… Are you the Sona? As in, the synth player for Pentakill?”

Sona nodded an affirmative, and signed, which Lux translated.

Yes, that’s right. Though, most people here aren’t familiar with that part of my career. I’m glad to meet a fan of my less known ventures!

For a moment Lux worried Jinx was about to pass out.

“Oh- oh holy shit I’m such a huge fan, wow this is crazy, you’re so talented I love Pentakill so much, I saw you guys a few years ago, I didn’t recognize you with your hair this color or without your eyeliner I’m so sorry.”

Thankfully Sona was amused by Jinx’s nervous display, and she laughed, a short and stuttered thing, likely the limit of noise she could make with her injury. Still, Jinx beamed at the positive affirmation. Lux knew that Sona did lots of different work, but hadn’t realized Sona was in a band Jinx listened to.

Quinn, however, seemed less amused by Jinx’s display, as she suddenly stepped forward and started asking Jinx questions about the symposium, and what she was doing. It was an obvious tactic, she was vetting Jinx. Sona took the opportunity and led Lux a few steps away, signing to her in small movements.

Is she your partner?

There was no way to hide the blush that crept onto her cheeks, and Sona smiled with a sweet ounce of sympathy.

You don’t have to be embarrassed, Lux, I promise I’m not the type to make a fuss.

Out of habit Lux looked around, as if anyone here was watching their conversation, before she signed back.

Yes. We met in one of our classes and just kind of fell into each other. Please don’t tell my parents.

Sona shook her head firmly, holding a finger up to her lips to say her lips were sealed.

I won’t, promise. To tell you the truth, Quinn is my partner. We’re secret too though, you know the climate of things back home.

Lux nodded, her head rushing with the realization her silly older high school crush and close friend was also a gay woman. Before they could talk much further, Quinn rested a hand on Sona’s shoulder, and leaned in to speak softly.

“I don’t mean to cut you short, but I believe you’re meant to play in a moment.”

Sona’s eyes went wide as if she had forgotten, and she nodded thanks to Quinn.

Sorry, we’ll talk later. Dance with Jinx for this piece, okay? It’s a love song, but no one knows but Quinn and the other musicians. It can be your secret too.

Lux nodded, and then Sona was whisked off.

“God damn.” Jinx said as she returned to her side. “Why are all of your friends so fucking hot.”

“Tell me about it.”

“And like, famous too. What the fuck. That’s like my favorite metal band. And you’re just casually friends with their synth player. And she's mega sexy.”

“Honestly, she plays with so many groups, I didn’t realize she was in that one. And yeah, I know. I had a crush on her when I was in high school.”

“I don’t blame you, can you imagine how soft she is?”

It was at this point that the lights of the hall dimmed ever so slightly, and a tap of a microphone system called everyone’s attention to where Professor Talis was standing on a small raised platform at the head of the hall.

“Good evening, everyone.” He said, hands clasped in front of him. “For those of you who don’t know me, my name is Jayce Talis, I’m a professor here at the Academy and the head of the physics department. On behalf of the Academy, and the Piltover council, I'd like to thank all of you for coming today. Whether you live here in our city of progress, or this is your first time seeing the beautiful Sun Gates, we welcome you gladly. Tonight on this Kindred’s Eve, we celebrate camaraderie and commerce between Piltover and the nations of the world, and the future of the sciences we’re fostering in our halls. Though Dean Heimerdinger couldn’t be present tonight, as he’s hard at work abroad, I know he wishes he could’ve personally been here to see you all. As the symposium presentations are showing in the lecture halls just a few doors down, we’re honored with a very special guest who’d like to perform for us tonight. The Academy isn’t just a place for scientists and mathematicians and engineers, we’re also patrons and appreciators of the arts. Ladies, Gentlemen, and otherwise, may I introduce Sona Buvelle.”

The gathering clapped at the end of his speech and to welcome Sona, who was sitting at a grand piano just behind him, where a few other musicians had set up. Sona bowed from her bench, and then gently rested her fingers on her keys.

The moment she began to play it was like a spell had been cast over the room. She had expected Sona to play a classical piece, or some kind of concerto medley. But now, as Sona played the first few chords with the upright bass player, and a very soft drum kit joined behind it all, it became clear Sona was playing lounge jazz.

As Lux looked around, she realized a few people had already begun dancing. Not ballroom dancing like before, but just close with one partner, swaying to a tune that sounded like whiskey in a backroom and a little bell chiming as the door opened and closed. Lux turned to look at Jinx, who met her eyes nervously.

“I figure, I should tell you I don’t know how to dance.” She stuttered. Lux giggled.

“We danced at Ekko’s show.”

“Yeah but that was like rave dancing. I don’t know how to slow dance.” Jinx shifted nervously from side to side, suddenly out of her element, as if she hadn’t been talking about dancing earlier. Maybe she wasn’t ready for this kind of energy.

There was no chance in hell Lux was going to let this pass though, so with swift movements she moved one of Jinx’s hands to her hips, and put her arms around Jinx’s shoulders.

“Just sway with the rhythm.” Lux said, leading Jinx to move with sudden confidence granted to her by the dim light. No one could see how intimate they were with the lights like this, unless they were intentionally looking for it.

Jinx followed her, just moving slowly with her and taking a step every now and then when she needed to. It was nice, it was romantic, and it was almost addictive watching the tension ease from Jinx’s shoulders and she let the music take it. It really was magical listening to the beautiful music Sona made while pressed close, in their matching suit and dress, like a couple would be. And they were, they were a couple.

This must’ve been heaven.

Everyone else disappeared, and it felt like her and Jinx were dancing alone in a sea of darkness and stars, leaning into the warmth of each other and enjoying every little movement, every little sway, every single note.

“I love you.” Lux whispered, and she meant it so deeply.

“I love you too, Blondie.” Jinx whispered back, like it was a geas they were signing. A pact of blood. They both meant it.

--

“So you’ll find that every instrument and every sound we can produce is more than just sound. Lots of people will tell you that music is only genuine when it’s about physical instruments and direct recording. But there’s more to it than that, there’s a precise and intricate creative process behind pop music, and it’s worth exploring and studying. Like the advent of digital art, musicians now have new tools at our disposal, and we shouldn't discount the music made with these new tools just because it appeals to large groups. It’s still art, with human choices behind every melody and word. So the next time someone tells you that pop music is just generic samey songs, you can tell them about the science that those artists employ to create their works. Thank you.”

Seraphine bowed and the crowd in the lecture hall applauded, a group of even more people Lux didn’t recognize, as well as various students and professors she was much more familiar with. As Serpahine stepped back, she and a professor Lux didn’t know gathered all of her audio equipment she’d used up onto a hand truck, and a crew of students who’d volunteered to help quickly took it away. She gave one more bow before practically skipping to take her seat by Lux. Her Jinx and Ezreal muttered what congratulations they could, but Jinx was standing now, then fast walking down to the front, where Professor Viktor had gotten up. The student volunteers brought in the cart with Jinx’s presentation, unloading a mess of mechanical bits Lux barely understood, but Jinx and Viktor got to work immediately. It only took a few moments for them to finish, and now Jinx was standing next to a complex looking engine, like something you’d see under the hood of a car, only much bigger. Viktor tested the mic that Seraphine had used, handed it to Jinx, and sat down with a thumbs up towards someone in the back Lux couldn’t see.

Now, Jinx, in that slick suit, was standing in front of what Lux imagined were some of the world's most prestigious academics, at least the ones in this lecture hall. Seraphine hadn’t shown even an inch of nerves, but then again she’d probably performed her music for far bigger crowds. Jinx wasn’t used to this at all, and Lux could see that unsure look as her eyes flickered over the crowd. Then they landed on Lux.

She gave two thumbs up and mouthed ‘You got this!’ Jinx swallowed hard, but nodded at her.

“Good even-woah!” The mic had a moment of feedback as Jinx pulled it suddenly away from her mouth. Slowly she laughed with no lack of awkwardness before speaking again. “Good evening everyone. S-Sorry about that, guess I should’ve learned something from Sera’s presentation, right?”

It earned a few laughs, which seemed to ease Jinx a bit.

“My name is Jinx, that’s right, Jinx, and I’m representing the Academy’s engineering department. So, there’s an anecdote, I uh, have- uhm.”

She slowed down again, and Lux wanted so badly to rush up and hug her. The stage fright was obvious in the way she was shaking.

Wait…

That wasn’t stage fright.

She watched as Jinx took a shaky breath in, and another one out, and she saw just the slightest glint of sweat glistening on her forehead. To everyone else, that was stage fright. But Lux knew Jinx. That was withdrawal. Shimmer withdrawal.

The silence in the hall was deafening, Lux almost wished a few people were murmuring to make Jinx’s uncomfortable motions less obvious. They made eye contact again, and Jinx seemed to resolve something by the way she closed her eyes, and breathed out.

“I’m not from Piltover.” She began suddenly. “I’m from Zaun, the undercity, a place not many of you know anything about. It’s a different world than what most of you come from.”

That earned a few murmurs now, and Lux was very afraid Jinx was going to do something very stupid to make a point.

“So, yeah, I grew up in poverty, and a place riddled by gang and drug violence. It’s the kind of place that messes you up, you know?”

Jinx paused to look towards whatever her presentation was meant to be. Then, she reached from behind the engine to pull out a glass tube filled with some kind of green liquid.

“But, y’know, just because it’s wracked by poverty doesn’t mean that Zaun is a bad place. It’s a place with people who stick together when they need to, who’ll fight to protect family, blood or otherwise. And it’s a place where we innovate. Not just because we want to, not because we want to impress the rest of the world. We innovate because we have to. Because if we don’t, we face the consequences. Injuries, pollution, disability, all things we’ve had to learn to work with and grow from, because we knew we’d never get a hand from above to lift us out of it.”

Now, she was starting to grab the attention of the crowd.

She placed the tube into a large open slot on the engine, holding it now by a small metal ring on the exposed end of it. Her hand was visibly shaking.

“Today I present to you, the modern engine. This is the Giopara V8, it’s an eight cylinder piston engine, many of you are probably familiar if you like cars. The mini Giropara V8 is employed in most Giopara models. Obviously, right, keep your parts in house to save some time. But this is a larger model designed for construction equipment. And this-” Jinx used her freehand to point to the tube in her hand. “Is a fissure gas battery. These are uncommonly used for exercise equipment actually, my sister has a boxing machine that’s powered by one. Inside are natural gasses that flow out from the fissure mines, distilled into liquid. For years these were deemed useless, until about a decade ago, we realized they could be mixed together and burned to generate energy, like many refined chemicals.

“Now, you won’t see large corporations like the Gioparas using these kinds of batteries. If you handle them incorrectly they can be very volatile, and require tons of inspection and maintenance. And well, large corporations don’t really like using their money for small things like this, they like cutting corners. If they did employ them, I’m guessing it would be about a month before they had a major factory incident, and maybe a few good men would go home in boxes. But we in Zaun discovered them, we learned why they're useful, because these gasses are incredibly efficient when handled with the care of an experienced chemist, like me. Far more efficient than an equivalent amount of gasoline would last.”

Then Jinx slid the canister in, ripped a cord on the side of the engine, and it began to run. Jinx had to speak up into her microphone, away from the now roaring engine.

“I modified this V8 model to work with my fissure gas battery. That single canister will keep this engine running for 4 times as long as a gallon of gasoline would. Though we don’t have the time to show you that right now, you can find the exact explanation of my process in a paper Professor Viktor recently published, my research was only a small part. It still needs work, as it generates a liquid waste, but we’re expecting to reduce the amount it makes with further work. If given proper research this design could be an incredible step towards using Zaunite technology to greatly reduce pollution with the machinery our blue collar workers experience everyday. This is only the surface of the research I’ve done while studying at the Academy. And despite my upbringing, despite the fact that most of the people in that big fancy hall don’t think a street rat like me should be here, I’m going to keep innovating. Because that’s just what Zaunite scientists do. We survive. Thank you.”

Jinx bowed, and the room rang out with applause. It wasn’t exactly roaring, but as Lux looked around it did seem like many of the people were impressed. She could tell how relieved Jinx was to be done with it, as she and Viktor quickly turned off and disassembled the engine.

When she sat back down with Lux, she sighed and sunk into her seat.

“That was incredible, Jinx!” Seraphine whispered. Jinx just smiled and nodded, gripping the arms of her seat tightly.

Lux leaned in to whisper, “Are you okay?”

Jinx nodded, they didn’t need to say it for them both to understand what was happening. It was inevitable after all. Though, clearly it hadn’t beaten Jinx, as she whispered back.

“If only they knew I’m so familiar with fissure gas batteries because I used to hot wire cars with em. The first three times I tried the cars blew up.”

Lux decided she wouldn’t be asking about that in the future.

--

With all the presentations they wanted to see completed, their little group made it back to the audience hall. It was nice, socializing with her friends now like this, she’d eased so much further into the group. The people who knew who Luxanna Crownguard was would just see a young woman laughing and talking with her friends.

Jinx had gone outside to smoke for a bit, which had apparently helped settle down her symptoms just a bit. When she returned she wasn’t nearly as shaky or sweaty, and she eased into the socialization as much as Lux had. 

And then, they had a very stupid idea.

It was both of theirs, really, not just Jinx’s. They’d snuck away from Ezreal and Seraphine to have a few drinks. Jinx insisted that they take advantage of the free champagne, and Lux was still high in her ‘exploration’ phase. So, one flute turned to two, turned to three, turned to four, over a somewhat short space of time.

When things got warmer and her laughing wasn’t hidden anymore by the crowds around them, Lux really felt like she was properly having fun with Jinx. They went from here to there, making stupid jokes, saying stupid things, both of them far more drunk than they should’ve been. Not wasted, but more drunk than Lux was used too. That’s when Ezreal came to check on them, and Lux made a mistake.

“Hey, we lost track of you guys for a while there.” He said, a look of confusion on his brow. Jinx stopped laughing at whatever joke they had made, and narrowed her eyes at him. She never did like Ezreal, and it had only recently clicked with Lux that it was because he had a crush on Lux. Jinx was jealous.

A devious idea crawled into her mind.

“You really do look handsome tonight, Ezreal.” She purred.

Both of them looked at her as if she’d just said whales could fly.

“I’m serious. I mean, you clean up so nicely. The Academy colors suit you well. How do you not have a girlfriend?”

Ezreal’s face went bright red. Jinx’s expression was still blank with her jaw slack.

“Uh, thanks. I-I don’t know.” Ezreal stuttered.

“Mmmm.” Lux made it very clear what her hum meant when she lightly bit her lip. “Do you wanna dance?”

That was how she ended up on the dance floor, with an over excited Ezreal who kept apologizing when he fell out of step. Every now and then she would glance out into the crowd to find Jinx, who looked furious now, and would wink at her. She didn’t wink back. Playing hard to get.

They danced for three songs before Lux leaned in to press a kiss to his cheek.

“Thanks, Ez. That was amazing.”

The sound of his breath hitching would make you think he’d just finished, and Lux walked away as if nothing happened, back to her very angry, very jealous girlfriend. Lux couldn’t even say anything before Jinx was yanking her back into the empty hallway, and slamming her back against the wall. Their lips crashed together, and Lux moaned openly into her mouth. Jinx was holding her possessively, kissing like her teeth were knives and her tongue was a collar. It was invigorating, she could feel her need building up like a runaway train. Jinx pulled away to sink her canine teeth into Lux’s neck, and she moaned again, loudly enough to remember where she was, and quickly covered her mouth. Jinx didn’t stop, and Lux giggled at how ridiculous it was.

“I don’t know what the fuck that was.” Jinx growled into Lux’s ear. “But you better remember who you belong to.”

She could smell the alcohol on her breath. They were both nice and drunk.

“Show me.”

Jinx slotted a leg between her dress, and Lux didn’t need an order to grind against it. She gasped, and threw her head back.

“Gods.” She moaned. “I knew that would get a rise out of you baby.”

Then all at once, Jinx stopped moving. It was like the train had frozen, losing all momentum in a way that defied physics entirely. Lux stopped too, looking at Jinx with a confused look. Jinx looked like she had seen a ghost.

“What?”

Jinx looked at her for a moment, before speaking, in a voice much lower and hushed than Lux had been prepared for.

“You did that on purpose? You flirted and danced with him like that, just to make me jealous?”

“Obviously, yeah. You thought I was being serious with him?”

Their eyes met, and Jinx’s brow furrowed as she stepped away, her head shaking as if in denial. She was shaking again.

“Y-You can’t be serious. After everything I’ve told you about me, how scared I am that you’re just going to up and leave me, you thought that was okay?”

Lux’s heart dropped into her stomach.

“Jinx I just-”

“You just wanted to fuck with me? You wanted me to think you were suddenly into Ezreal just so I’d get mad and fuck you? Are you serious with me right now?”

Oh gods. She hadn’t thought about it like this.

“I-It was supposed to be fun, I thought you’d like-”

“Are you kidding me Lux? Are you fucking brainless?” Jinx was raising her voice now, and there was something in her tone that Lux just hadn’t heard before. A pain that seemed all too familiar, and yet Lux hadn’t ever had to bear.

“Jinx…”

Jinx scoffed as Lux reached a hand out to try and take hers, her pink eyes suddenly looking a shade of red as she blinked rapidly and stepped away.

“Don't follow me, Blondie. Enjoy dancing with your friends .” The venom in her voice bit far more than Lux could have anticipated.

Then, Jinx turned, and in that nice expensive suit she’d had worn just for Lux, she walked away. Lux didn’t disobey Jinx’s instructions, instead she just found the nearest bathroom and started crying.

Chapter Text

Jinx

--

The morning after the Gala was weird. Jinx practically cried herself to sleep when she got home in frustration once Vi had left her to her own devices and, so waking up she was exhausted. Vi had been good about it though, being there for Jinx but not pressuring her for most of the details. All she knew was Lux had done something that hurt Jinx, and that was enough for Vi to be in her corner. It took about every gram of sugar in her system to do it, but Jinx found the will to check her phone after staring at the ceiling for a while after she woke. She had about a jillion messages from Lux, a mix of missed calls, voice mails, and texts that previewed multiple variations of “I’m so sorry Jinx I…” and “Please I didn’t mean to…”. Frankly, Jinx didn’t want to see any of it.

Her phone dropped back down to the bed as she pinched the bridge of her nose, groaning at how much she ached and how dry her throat was. Depression hangovers fucking sucked. She rolled out of the bed, just in a pair of boxers and a tank top which she’d apparently replaced her suit with at some point. It was in a crumpled ball on her desk, and she decided she’d ignore that too. Jinx wanted to do anything but think about the Gala. She refused to think of the hurt and betrayal she’d felt when Lux said those words to her. No. No, it was easier to ignore. Because if she thought on it, she might realize that she’d also overacted, and Jinx wasn’t in any mood for self fucking reflection.

The smell of cooking from downstairs moved her legs on their own, and soon she was at the kitchen island. Vi placed down a plate of food without pause, greasy bacon and sausage links next to freshly fried hash browns and an Egg Sandwich on toast, filled to the brim with diced jalapenos and red peppers. It would wake her up alright. She muttered a thank you, and Vi simply grunted to acknowledge it.

The food did wonders for her, and after downing two glasses of water and a glass of orange juice, she felt a little bit more like a person and not a zombie. Thankfully, Vi didn’t question her anymore about the previous night’s events, just got whatever she asked for during breakfast. Jinx could practically feel the sympathy dripping off of her eyes whenever she glanced at Jinx, and she tried her best not to snap at Vi for it. No, she didn’t deserve that, she was just being a good big sister. But at the moment, anything could have pissed Jinx off.

When she finished her meal, Jinx’s thoughts began wandering back towards the last night, and she couldn’t have that. Not with the way she could feel the itch in her left arm where she would shoot up, not when she was sweating more than usual, and shaking when she walked. If she thought about it, the chances of her finding one of her shimmer vials she’d hidden would go up. Jinx needed to decompress.

She’d just turned on her shower and was about to step in when she looked in the mirror. She’d kept her braids before going to bed, and as she pulled at one of them she felt the knots that had warped in. How long had it been since it’d been worked on? She rarely got it cut by professionals, and even then she’d only gone to get it evened out at the ends. Once she’d figured out how to do it herself, she hardly needed help. The braids had started when she was just a little kid, only recently a girl and not a boy. She wanted to grow her hair out long like the pretty girls she saw on T.V. What was originally a childhood fascination became obsession with Silco raising her, he always wanted her to create a strong identity for herself, so that all of her would be something that people were afraid of. People knew her for these braids. They feared them. Silco’s psycho attack dog. That’s what she was back then. They were so annoying to maintain, even more annoying to wash, and the worst to dry. Why did she even keep them like that?

…

She turned off the shower.

When she pulled the scissors out of the downstairs drawer, Vi, understandably, interjected.

“Pow-Pow, what are you doing with those?”

Jinx tried her best not to be offended by the clear implications. It was the right thing to ask, Jinx had a history of cutting after all.

“Cutting my hair.” She answered truthfully, if a bit monotone. “Just wanted to even it out.”

Vi gave her skeptical eyes for a moment, but nodded.

“Sorry, just-”

“It’s fine.” Jinx cut in. “I know I’m crazy. If I were you I’d stop me from taking them too.”

“You’re not crazy.” Vi said with a huff, walking forward to pull Jinx into a hug. “You just have problems other people don’t. You just have things that you have to keep in mind to be… you know…”

“Normal.” Jinx filled in the blank.

“I don’t mean it like that, I just mean even keeled. Happy.”

“Yeah. It’s whatever, you don’t need to give me the middle school presentation talk. I’ve lived with this shit for longer than we’ve been in this house.”

Vi was silent for a while before she pulled away, smiling far too warmly. Jinx took that as her cue to leave. So she went back up the stairs, into the bathroom, and she cut her hair. Her hands trembled when she did it, but she didn’t dare ask Vi for help. That would lead to more questions, and Jinx wanted it done now.

Jinx didn’t look in the mirror after, didn’t even look at what she’d taken off, just went right into the shower and turned the water to scolding. It felt good to scrub last night’s grime off her skin, and the hot water even made the shakes go away, if just for a moment. Maybe the shock overloaded her nervous system. And, damn, it was so much easier to wash her hair like this, holy shit. She didn’t have to sift through waves and strands and threads, no her hands just shook through a shaggy little mane and it rinsed out in moments. Using a single towel to dry it was even better, it cut down the maintenance by like a third of the time.

When the fog faded and she could see in the mirror, Jinx had to clasp a hand over her mouth to not scream. Instead of the long locks curling and flowing to the ground, Jinx’s hair stopped in a shaky little line halfway down her neck, not even reaching her shoulders. It was shorter than Lux’s hair like this. Her fringe still hung where it would over her face, even wet like this. Shakily, Jinx reached her other hand to touch her awkward cut, looking down at the braids she’d piled in the corner of the bathroom. She’d unraveled enough to make it even where she cut, but they were still perfectly contained.

There was no going back now, no reattaching and no uncutting. Years of growing her hair out, gone in a matter of moments. She fought back tears for a few moments before steeling herself. She had wanted to do it. It was impulsive, and it was manic, but it wasn’t something she didn’t want. It even looked nice, and it was so much easier to take a shower.

She choked a sob back into a laugh at how ridiculous she was being. Because there was suddenly a weight that had been dropped from Jinx’s shoulders that she hadn’t even realized she was carrying. The weight of her hair, and the weight of what Silco wanted her to be. This was one more step into becoming her own person. Not what her parents named her, not Powder, and not even the Jinx Silco made. She was closer to becoming Jinx. The Jinx who had an older sister who loved her and a pretty girlfriend who made stupid choices when drunk and an annoying cop who was going to become her sister in law and a best friend who used to have feelings for her.

She tried a few different stylings there in the bathroom before just letting it fall naturally and walking back downstairs with clean clothes on.

When Vi looked up from the living room couch, she nearly dropped the remote. She just stared at Jinx, mouth aghast and eyes wide. Jinx glanced at the TV, then back at Vi.

“Told you I was gonna cut it.” She said simply.

Vi stammered for a second, before clearing her throat.

“Yeah. I guess you did. It looks nice. Please don’t tell me you put the rest of it down the drain cause I don’t wanna call that weird plummer again.”

Jinx laughed. It felt good to laugh like this. A regular conversation.

“No, I’m gonna go stuff 'em in a trash bag. Thought, maybe I could donate it or something. People do that shit right? Donate hair?”

“Yeah, I think so. That’s a great idea.”

Jinx went back upstairs and did as she said, removing all her clips and ties and ornaments that she kept in the braids, cleaning a few off and still putting them into her current haircut. They were important to her, she didn’t have to flush all the memories away after all. When the shaking came back and the itching ran deeper, Jinx got her fightstick out and booted up High Noon. The second half of her decompression, fighting games. She couldn’t think about last night if all of her brain power was devoted to skill based games.

Her phone rang twice more while she ground the session on, and she refused to pick it up to even look at it.

Ekko noticed she was playing eventually and shot her a dm to play together. Thankfully he didn’t ask questions when Jinx said sure, but didn’t want to use voice chat. He was her only friend who played fighting games, and they were at roughly the same skill level, so it was her favorite way to play. In fact, she thought maybe she could just sink her day into this, until Vi called up to her at lunchtime.

“Powder, there’s somewhere here who wants to talk with you.”

Jinx froze, and anger bloomed in her chest. How dare Lux come to her house, announced, after everything.

“I’m not talking to her.” Jinx half yelled back.

“It’s not Lux.” Vi replied. “It’s a guy.”

What?

Jinx let Ekko know she was hopping out, and made her way down the stairs.

Standing awkwardly in front of their front door, wearing those maroon jeans and a graphic tee was Ezreal.

They made eye contact, and she saw the surprise in his eyes as he saw her new haircut. He smiled a bit awkwardly, and rubbed the back of his neck with one hand.

“Hey.” He said.

Jinx stared back at him, unsure whether she wanted to tackle him and punch the shit out of him or tell Vi to do it. Vi who had pointedly made her way to the basement.

“Hey.” She replied back instead.

Ezreal looked around a bit, messing with a lanyard hanging from his pocket before speaking.

“Sorry for showing up to your house like this. Not stalking you, I promise, I got your address from Ekko.” He chuckled awkwardly after that. When Jinx didn’t reply he continued. “So, uh… could we talk? You and I like, person to person. No bullshit, no pretense, just… talk.”

Now Jinx was certain that she’d died and gone to some kind of bizzaro world. To whatever credit she could give him, Ezreal sounded different. Before when they’d spoken he always talked like he wanted you to think he was cool. But now like this, his voice felt raw. Honest. That was probably why Jinx shrugged and gestured for the living room, taking a seat on the couch.

Ezreal nodded and chose the love seat, resting his elbows on his knees and his chin on his hands.

“So,” Jinx began. “Uh, what’s up man?”

Ezreal waited a long time before talking, not intentionally, it was clear that he was debating in his head how to phrase his words. Finally, he spoke.

“I wanted to apologize to you. For last night.”

Jinx was stunned into silence. He took it as a cue to keep talking.

“Lux pulled me away during the gala last night, a while after she and I danced. She was practically sobbing in hysterics once we were away from the crowd. She kept saying ‘I messed up, I messed up’ and I didn’t know what else to do so I asked her what was wrong. I promise I wasn’t trying to pry into your business, I was just worried about her.”

He paused, looking down at the carpet before his eyes darted up to her. Jinx swallowed through the anxious pit in her stomach, and nodded for him to continue. Her hands were shaking, though Ezreal probably thought that was from anger or something, not withdrawal.

“She uh- she told me that you guys have been officially dating for a week or two now, and that you’ve been sleeping together since the show with the Firelights. And she told me that she got a bit drunk and danced… with me, in order to make you jealous. Sexual fuel or something, she could barely say the words.” He laughed that part out, but the hurt was evident in his tone.

For the first time since she’d met him, Jinx felt sympathy for Ezreal. He was annoying, and he’d also made some questionable choices while drunk, but she could tell he wasn’t an awful guy. He had a crush on Lux, and was facing the reality that Lux had pretended to reciprocate just to get to Jinx. If there was something he felt that she could understand, that betrayal was one of them.

“And she told me that it basically worked, but she told you what she did and you freaked out on her. And like, to be clear, yeah that’s sort of a fucked up thing to do. No, not sort of. What she did was super fucked up.”

When Jinx spoke, her voice was barely a croak.

“Why are you apologizing?”

He grimaced, and sighed, running a hand through his mop of hair as he sat up.

“I… kind of knew you guys were together. Before she told me. Well, I didn’t know like with empirical evidence. But, you guys haven’t really gone to any length to hide how much time you spend together. It doesn’t take a genius to realize you aren’t spending all that time working on civil engineering projects. So I’m apologizing for letting Lux dance with me. I was fairly certain you two were dating but, when she started flirting with me and pulling me onto the dance floor, I think my brain just turned off man. I mean Lux is amazing and- I was just so enthralled by her, y’know?” (Jinx did know.) “So even though I thought you two were a thing, I went along with it. The idea of her being into me was too much to say no. And that’s fucked up. It’s not fair to you. So, I’m sorry.”

More stunned silence. It was clear Ezreal had more he wanted to say though, more to talk about.

“You want a beer?”

Ezreal looked up at her with confusion, before laughing nervously.

“It’s like 11:45 in the morning.”

Jinx stood up, and went to get them each a cold bottle from the kitchen. He didn’t complain when she handed him one though.

“I get the feeling we’re about to dump some shit on each other. So, cheers.”

She held her bottle out to him, still icy in her grasp, and Ezreal looked at her with amazement. Eventually he smiled, and tapped the bottles together.

“Fuck it. Cheers.”

They both took a long swig as Jinx sat down, and Ezreal continued.

“I know I come off as this cool playboy jock-” (“You don’t”) “But the truth is, I’m not that guy at all. I’m not cool, I barely have any friends, the fray boy thing is just a mask. I think I fit in with the rich Piltover trust fund boys about as much as you do.”

Jinx laughed at that, and took another swig.

“I mean, I had you pegged for a phony, but not to that level.”

“Yeah. Truth is I spent most of my childhood away from Piltover. My folks traveled a lot for their work and so, little baby Ezreal went with them. Never in one place long enough to make friends. When they died, I was old enough to start college and had plenty of inheritance to my name. So I started studying here while doing field work. I’m an archaeologist, in case I haven’t told you before. I work with the Shuriman government mostly for my digs, but I’ve done some work in Demacia and Noxus too. Not Ionia or the Freljord yet, always wanted to though.”

“Ekko mentioned at the show. Seems… interesting.”

Ezreal laughed.

“You don’t have to pretend, I know most people think it’s boring. But it’s my passion man. It uh, didn’t make me a hit at parties when pretty girls asked about what I'm into and I would tell them about a skeleton we found, and what its age and the objects surrounding it could tell us about ancient Shuriman culture.”

It was Jinx’s turn to laugh, and she tilted the beer bottle towards him.

“That’s your first mistake, you’re telling that kind of thing to Piltover Pushup Bras. I doubt girls like Marcie have a brain to even comprehend what archeology is.”

“Yeah. I guess you’re right. Anyway, the whole stupid macho thing was just me trying to seem cool. I’m not. I’m sort of a fucking loser honestly. Pretty girls make me do stupid things, hot guys intimidate me.” (Jinx made note of his word choice there, but didn’t bring it up. It painted a pretty clear picture though.)

But here he was, baring himself like this, and suddenly Jinx was seeing him in a completely different light. He was like her. An outcast, too confused about what was happening inside to connect with anyone. It was no wonder he developed a crush on Lux, even her flaky fake half attention was probably more validation than he’d gotten from others.

“Actually?” She said, “I think you are kind of cool. Not the guy we brought to the show. You, the guy who’s being real with me. So, it’s my turn now. I’m sorry for how I’ve treated you. I just assumed you were some shitty loser creep who was way too into my girlfriend, and I can be a little possessive. I was wrong.”

He smiled a bit sadly at that, and raised his bottle up.

“Apology accepted.”

They both drank deep, before a silence fell over them and they sat there together, half empty beers in hand.

“Maybe you and I could start over?” Ezreal asked.

Jinx scratched a bit at the itching against her neck and wiped a bit of sweat from her brow. She wasn’t exactly at her best but, she had to respect the integrity Ezreal had to come and apologize for his part, small as it was.

“Yeah. Why not.”

He smiled way bigger than she’d seen him smile before. It was genuine.

Jinx continued “To be clear though, do not take us being friends as an excuse to be weird and get a crush on me. None of that shit.”

“Cross my heart and hope to die.” He said. “Though, that haircut does suit you, and you are pretty hot.”

“You’re lucky my ego is overriding the alarms there.”

They both laughed now, and Jinx had to admit this was nice. She didn’t have many close friends. Lots of friends who were more like acquaintances from her days as a dealer, but not people she felt legitimately close too. Her sister, Ekko, and Lux were the only people she was real with. Maybe Ezreal could be the fourth.

“I’m sorry you got dragged into all this.” Jinx said, figuring that another apology was in order. “Lux and I… we’ve been kind of a whirlwind since we met. I’m usually like that but, obviously she isn't. It wasn’t right of her to use you to try and rile me up. It wasn’t right of her to try and rile me up like this in the first place.” She tried not to sound bitter, but it was hard. Thankfully Ezreal’s presence was sort of a barrier between her and shooting up to make her brain stop right now, because otherwise being forced to think about the betrayal would have pushed her over.

“You don’t have to apologize, she already did her fair share of that. You running off sobered her up I think. I’m not sure what’s in my lane here but, if it makes any difference I know she wasn’t trying to hurt you. From what she told me about you two she just got a bit ahead of herself. Just thought it would be another fun thing to try, she didn’t think about how it would feel for you or me.”

Jinx sighed and deflated into the couch a bit, taking another long sip of her beer. Lux had betrayed her trust but it was an overreaction on her part, an overreaction caused by withdrawal symptoms mixing with alcohol and her crippling overwhelming fear of abandonment. It wasn’t like Lux had cheated on her, this wasn’t enough to ruin what they had. Ugh, apparently losing her braids was making her more mature.

“Yeah.” She said, “I didn’t take it well. I’ll call her and apologize. I think she’s said I’m sorry a million times in my texts and voicemails at this point.”

He chuckled a bit wearily, before downing the last of his beer. Jinx followed suit.

“Well,” he said. “I should probably wait an hour before I drive. I haven’t eaten anything. Do you wanna hang out? I could order some food for us and your sister.”

At this point, what was the worst that could happen?

“Why the fuck not. You play video games?”

“Yeah. Uh, probably not what you play though, I don’t play popular games like, shooters and stuff.”

Jinx raised an eyebrow. “Alright, what do you play?”

Ezreal seemed to struggle inside with shyness, probably feeling like he was still at a party with the trust fund babies, who would call him a slur if he told them he liked animal crossing.

“Uh, more niche stuff. You know, like, fighting games? Shurima Showdown, High Noon, Undeadgirls. Y-You get it.”

Jinx’s jaw dropped for a moment, and she shook her head in bewilderment.

“How the fuck are you actually cool?”

--

13 missed calls. 27 text messages. 8 Voicemails. That was what Lux had left her in total from the time she left the party to now, spaced out at random intervals. She listened to part of one voicemail, but hearing Lux’s sobbing apologies made her delete all the others without listening to them. She’d never heard Lux cry like that, like the world had just been taken out from under her. Fuck, she was so mad at herself for reacting the way she did. 

She let her head hit the back of her bedroom wall, and hovered a finger over the call button. Ezreal had given her what advice he could, but from the way he talked it was clear he’d never had a partner beyond one night stands. Though, she wasn’t sure if that would stay the case. Jinx had made a joke offhand about Ekko thinking Ezreal was hot (she could objectively appreciate the twinky goods now that his cloud of douchery had been dispelled) and his face had gone bright red.

Fuck it, she wasn’t the type who hesitated. That’s why she cut her hair after all. No holding back, no regrets.

The tone only sounded twice before the line picked up.

“Jinx?”

Lux’s voice was raw, as if she had a sore throat, and there was a very slight wet sniffle from the other side to show that Lux was still half crying.

“Hey, Blondie.”

She could practically feel Lux sag down with relief. Probably, a mess from last night. There was hesitation from the other side of the call, as she heard Lux’s bed shift as she clearly sat up.

“Uhm…” Lux stuttered, her voice shaky. “I’m sorry-”

“Don’t.” Jinx said, quickly and sharply. Lux promptly stopped talking. “I know. I read all your texts, I only got through one of the voicemails. I know you’re sorry.”

Silence from the other side, for a long time they sat like that, before Lux spoke in a very very small voice.

“Okay.”

She was still scared. Jinx didn’t like hearing her girl sound like that. Even if she was still mad.

“I’m not going to break up with you.” Was what Jinx decided on starting with. “So, you can calm down.”

“Okay.” Even more shaky, but now with desperate relief.

“I’m still pissed about what you did. It was messed up, and it hurt me and Ezreal. Don’t do that shit again, unless I give you permission. And whoever you pretend to flirt with isn’t someone we know, and isn’t someone who has feelings for you, and isn’t someone who I might actually see as someone you could leave me for, and never when we’re drunk.”

She could feel the confusion from Lux, almost certainly more on Jinx defending Ezreal than anything else, but Jinx kept going before she could say anything.

“You hurt me, but… I know that you weren’t trying to. I know that you just thought it would rile me up and it would be a turn on for you if I was acting all jealous and possessive. News flash, you don’t have to make me think you’re bored of me to get me to act like that, I’ll do it at the drop of a dime.”

Lux swallowed audibly, and spoke.

“I promise I won’t do it again, I promise.”

“I know Blondie, I know. I accept your apology. I’m sorry for taking it so badly. I… last night you saw what happened to me during my presentation. So I was shaking practically all night long, and started to feel bad shit coming and, then you started flirting with Ezreal and, you danced with him and, it all went over. I was so upset, I thought you were gonna leave me. But, the game worked, I wanted to make you remember that you were mine. Sounds a lot less sexy when we talk about it like this. And then, when you told me you only did it to make me jealous I just… I felt like I was being manipulated. Like you didn’t care about my feelings. Like I was just a sexy toy to you. I know you don’t feel that way. I’m sorry I blew up at you.”

“Uhm- apology accepted. Can I come over? Please?”

Jinx smiled.

“Yeah. I’ll come pick you up.”

--

She decided to wait at the dorm door for Lux rather than wait in the parking lot, which was practically empty considering it was break. One new problem she’d have to deal with was that she’d need a scarf. For years she could always wrap her braids around her neck to keep warm, and now they weren’t there. And it was getting cold fast on the coast like this, fast approaching winter. At least she kept warmer than most, one minor benefit of having your circulatory system forever altered by shimmer. She’d decided for some reason she wanted to look nice still for Lux, so she’d put on one of her nicer hoodies, her fishnets, and her nice jeans with the rips in them to show the nets off. She knew that being a mentally ill druggie androgynous alt punk girl was where her appeal lied, and she knew it worked for Lux.

When Lux walked out the door in a cute white wool sweater and a pair of yoga pants, her eyes, puffy from crying, fell on Jinx and she smiled, and then froze as shock hit her. Suddenly Jinx was feeling as shy as Ezreal, and she looked away from Lux’s shock.

“It’s okay if you don’t like it. I won’t be upset.” Jinx lied.

“Wow… it’s different.”

Her heart fell, and she tried not to let it show. She heard Lux come closer, but she still couldn’t stand to look at her until two warm hands turned her by the cheeks to make eye contact.

“I love it, Jinx. It looks nice. It’s very handsome, which matches your very pretty face.”

Jinx flushed bright red, looking down at Lux from their few inches of height difference, and she couldn’t stop herself as she leaned in and kissed Lux. Lux made a squeak of surprise, but quickly her hands left her cheeks and her arms were wrapping around Jinx’s neck. Jinx moved her hands to take her by the hips and their kiss deepend. God she was so nice to kiss. Now Jinx understood why Vi and Caitlyn kept getting back together after every stupid fight they had. Making out after a fight was better than sex. When Lux moaned into her mouth, Jinx couldn’t help but imagine what sex after a fight was like.

She was practically ready to push Lux up against the wall of the brick building and rip a hole in those yoga pants, when Lux pulled away, panting and cheeks red.

“S-Slow down a bit please, not in public.”

Jinx took a few heavy breaths, before she nodded, willing herself to calm down with the cold.

“Sorry.” Jinx huffed out. Lux nodded, and pulled away, much to Jinx’s dismay.

“It’s too cold out here. Can we go to your place now?”

“Yeah, good idea.”

The heat from her truck was a welcome feeling in the cloudy late autumn afternoon, and it was nice to be next to Lux again. Because she was a lecher, she couldn’t help but drive with one hand on the wheel, and the other on Lux’s thigh, teasing with the fabric of her yoga pants and rubbing perhaps a little too softly in towards her inner thigh. Lux was doing a valiant job of not seeming affected by it, though Jinx knew she was.

At least, that was part of it. The other part became clear when Lux spoke up.

“I think we need to talk about what we are and sex.”

Jinx’s hand practically ripped away from Lux’s thigh and planted firmly onto her steering wheel.

“Yeah?” Her voice was just as shaky as her hands. A new knot of anxiety formed in her core.

“I just… I’m not saying I want us to stop having sex. I definitely don’t want to stop. But I think I need to take last night as a lesson. We’re going a bit too fast.”

Jinx wasn’t sure what to do with this information, so she just kept driving, tapping her fingers against the wheel as they went back down towards Zaun. Eventually it became clear that Lux was waiting for a response, so she said the first thing that came to her mind.

“Well finishing too fast has only ever been a problem when I’m with you to be clear, and really that’s a compliment, I’ve never had that issue before.”

She couldn’t tell if Lux was irritated or amused by her humor, because Jinx was far too nervous to look over. 

“You know what I mean Jinx.” (Irritated) “We only just started dating, and even then we’ve only been sleeping together for around a month and a half. Just… I thought I wanted to be adventurous with everything that we came across and explore it with you. But I went too far and I hurt you. And, Ezreal, since you seemed upset about that. I just want to slow it down. I want to enjoy what we have at a safe pace, I don’t want to get ahead of myself again. I’m not really sure what exactly that means, but maybe we need to both consider that.”

Another pause. She wanted Jinx’s input, no stupid jokes either.

“I mean, that’s fine.” She said. “We just won't do the kinky stuff we haven’t touched yet. And like, no public shit, and, I don’t know, what else do you want?”

“It’s not like, a single one thing. I just need to take my time. Before we barrel our way into anything, we should talk it over and make sure it’s okay, and isn’t gonna hurt anyone’s feelings, or make us uncomfortable. I can still explore this without being afraid I’m going to hurt you.”

Jinx was trying very hard to dissociate ‘go slower’ from ‘I don’t want you’ and she was doing a mostly good job. She couldn’t have two abandonment issue freak outs and two damn days after all. Whatever, if Lux wanted it then it would be fine.

“Fine. We’ll take our time or whatever.”

“Thank you. I’m sorry, I just don’t want to-”

“It’s fine, Blondie. Seriously. It’s whatever. Like you said, it's not like we'll stop sleeping together. That would make me upset.”

Lux sighed, clearly a little weary of this conversation. No doubt due to Jinx’s reaction. God they were both all kinds of fucked up and codependent already, and they had only just gotten together.

The rest of the drive left Jinx to her own thinking devices. Lux wanted to explore herself, but in a safe environment and at her own speed. That probably extended beyond sex, she’d been completely repressed by her family after all. Sure, she could do that at Jinx’s place and in Zaun with their friends but, there was likely still a fear her parents might discover them here. Spending spring break together in the house would be nice. But…

“Hey Lux.”

She looked up from her phone with a question in her eyes. Jinx grinned devilishly as her idea formed more and more in her head.

“You wanna leave town for the rest of break?

Chapter Text

Lux

--

Lux hated family vacations. If anything was a full representation of what she’d never gotten from her parents, this was the one that always stuck out to her, even when she was little. She’d see commercials on TV for cruises and beach getaways and the families advertised were always smiling in a group, taking a picture or sitting at a table or playing a game. That’s not what her family vacations looked like. Well, maybe they had before she could remember them. They tended to rotate two or three locales, as the Crownguards had a number of beach house properties to choose from, and for anything else they could always rent one that was just as nice. You could do anything with their kind of money.

But instead of laughing on the beach, or playing out in the water, her parents spent most of their vacation away from others. The life of the Crownguards was a life in the eyes of Demacian society, so of course they couldn’t spend their time relaxing like normal people. Her father would spend the entire week watching old movies that didn’t appeal to her at all, and her mother would have her nose in one of her cheap romance books, a glass of wine next to her at all times. It was understandable, if you were her parents. But for their children, it was less than exciting. It was boring, and by the time they had finally allowed Garen to supervise Lux out on their own, it had already been ruined for her. 

And she loved her brother, but he wasn’t exactly the most exciting person in the world. He’d always want to check out local hobby stores for wargaming models or board games and other nerdy things that Lux wasn’t interested in. Not to mention Lux wasn’t exactly a common client of these places, she always felt incredibly uncomfortable surrounded by men who could barely look at a woman without stuttering.

And when Lux became old enough that she could finally go places alone? They stopped doing family trips all together. “You’re a young woman now, not a girl. We don’t need to do frivolous things.” Crownguard vacations turned into her mom and dad doing the exact same thing as always, but from the comfort of their home instead of a beach house or hotel room. 

So when Jinx suggested they take a trip, Lux was skeptical at first.

“I mean, I guess that could be fun. Don’t you think vacation trips are kind of lame though?”

Jinx raised an eyebrow as she drove.

“What? Lame? I figured you’d be all about that stuff, you’re like the demographic for yearly vacation trips. Wealthy nuclear families.”

Lux crossed her arm as she stewed on the memories of asking to buy a swimsuit for the beach, and being told it was far too ‘inappropriate’ for a girl of her status, and then not being allowed to the beach anyway.

“Well, maybe they’re fun for wealthy families with parents who think about their children as more than political assets.”

Clearly this surprised Jinx as she was quiet for a while, and Lux was getting ready to apologize for snapping when Jinx spoke first.

“Ok well, your parents aren’t coming with us. It’ll just be you and me. Or, I don’t know, maybe we could invite some other people if you wanted. That would make it easier to afford a hotel, though it would be harder for us to fuck. I’m not sure I’d be able to enjoy a blow job if I could hear someone we know playing cards a room over.”

Hmm, that was a fair point. It would just be the two of them, well unless they invited other people like Jinx suggested. And the two of them would be able to do whatever they wanted, whenever they wanted. She’d barely dented her budget for the semester, surely her parents wouldn’t notice if she spent a bit out of Piltover. They hardly looked at it anyway unless she went over.

They could go where they wanted, eat where they wanted, wear what they wanted. The thought of wearing a Bikini that would make Jinx drop to her knees was very appealing.

“There is the issue of finding a place so suddenly.” Jinx continued. “It’s autumn break so there’s probably a fair amount of students heading to the tourist beaches along the Shuriman coast where it’s warm. I bet we could find something if we looked hard though.”

This was starting to be exciting, and the nerves and depression of her mistake were washing away with Jinx at her side. She was confident she could get away with this trip, and with the boundaries they had begun building she would be safe with Jinx.

“We don’t have to find a place, actually.”

“Huh? What do you mean?”

Lux grinned, and moved a hand over to play with some of Jinx’s exposed fishnets below her jeans.

“My family owns a beach house in Tereshni. A beach house we haven’t used in almost 6 years. A beach house that I know a trick to sneak into, and no alarms or security system installed. A master bedroom and 3 other rooms for 1, a huge kitchen and a big living area. There’s even a pool table in the basement- Jinx it would be perfect for us to take some friends along.”

Jinx put her fingers to her chin and began tilting her head back and forth, as she always did when she thought an idea over.

“Tereshni is about… if we took my truck across the Kalduga cape ferry, I want to say an 8 hour drive? We could do that. The fact that we wouldn’t have to rent a place would save a fuck ton of money. We spend tomorrow driving down, and then if we drove back up Monday we’d get like 5 days of chill beach time. If we skipped class Tuesday we could get an extra day too, but skipping the first day back from break isn’t a good look.”

“But it is doable. Well, it is for me. What about you?”

“I’ll just tell my professors a flight got canceled, it’s fine. I just won't skip as much for the second half of the semester and there’s no problem. Shit, are we actually doing this Lux? Are we actually going on a road trip?”

Lux smiled and nodded, pulling her phone to start looking things up about Tereshni. Tourist locations, best restaurants, the whole nine yards.

“I mean, I want to. This isn’t too crazy right? Like, we can just hang out and have fun. That’s safe.”

“That’s what I’m saying, it’s perfect for your whole slow down mentality. Real talk though, are we bringing people with us? Cause like, that sounds fun but, if we don’t have anyone with we could bang against every flat surface of the house. And, getting fucked in your family beach house… I mean that must be someone’s kink right?”

Hmm, that was a tough choice. A small part of her just wanted it to be Jinx and her so they could trash the beach house and treat it like their personal sex pad. But, maybe it would be smart to bring other people along. It might stop them from doing something really stupid, and the master bedroom was on the first floor. If everyone else took the upstairs rooms, they shouldn’t have a problem taking a moment to themselves now and then, if they weren’t too loud. That or they could designate times for everyone else to leave the house so they could be as loud as they wanted.

“I think we should invite people. I mean, it’s last minute so what are the chances we could have people for an 8 hour drive tomorrow? Who would we even invite?”

“Ekko, for one.” Jinx said. “He’s pretty much my best friend, and we’re on… goodish terms right now. Not bad terms at least. You said there’s 3 spare rooms? So… you seem close with Seraphine. We could invite her?”

“Sure, that sounds nice. Though she’s so energetic, we might get tired of her by the end of the week.”

Jinx laughed.

“Yeah, with a body like hers I kind of doubt it. Not to be gross but like, fuck she’s fine. Actually, that kind of brings up something we should talk about. Uh, since we’re dating, and like exclusive, what’s your opinion on threesomes?”

Surprise flashed over Lux’s face, before she had to think it over. She hadn’t really considered having sex with anyone other than Jinx since they’d started dating. Well, she’d certainly appreciated lots of people since her gay realization but never seriously considered it.

“Would you be into it?”

She hoped Jinx didn’t take it as some kind of trap, she was glad Jinx was being honest and asking her about this now. Open communication was healthy and important. She may have read about a million relationship advice posts the previous night in her guilty depression.

“I mean, yeah. There’s so many hot people out there, so like if we as a couple wanted to try that together I’d be into it. Only if you wanted to though, and no guys for your sake. And to be clear, I’m not like trying to open our relationship or anything like that. I’ve… I’ve never felt like this with anyone before. I was actually sort of convinced that romance wasn’t real until I met you. Clearly you smashed that preconception to pieces. But sex and romance are different for me. I love sex, but my sexual attraction to someone doesn’t mean I want to date them. Like, Seraphine is hot and I’d love to get her into bed, but I don’t want to date her. Sorry, am I rambling?”

Lux let it all wash over her, objectively listening to everything Jinx said and trying to listen honestly to herself. The idea of Jinx sleeping with Seraphine, for example, wasn’t an idea she enjoyed but… if she were also involved? Or if the two of them were doing it for her to watch? Her chest fluttered for a second and she shifted in place. She was also a little high on the idea that apparently she had convinced Jinx that romance was real.

“Uhm… I guess if we found a girl who wanted to, I could maybe do it. But, we’d have to put like a million ground rules down, I don’t want us to lose a friendship or put something between the two of us because of it. Foundations of trust would have to be established well in advance, before we even discussed the option. Slow, remember?”

“Yeah, slow. I totally agree, 100%. It doesn’t make you uncomfortable when I say someone is hot, does it?”

She couldn’t deny the slightest bit of jealousy over Jinx’s attention, but she got sooo much of it that it usually went away in a few seconds. If anything she appreciated how open and free Jinx was with her feelings.

“It’s fine, just make sure you talk about how hot I am as much as you talk about how hot other people are.”

“Are you kidding me?” Jinx chuckled. “I could go on and on and on, baby. You’re like the prettiest girl ever, to start, your nose is so cute and your lips are so soft and your eyes are the color of the clear ocean. And when you show off your shoulders? Fuck I just wanna cover them in bite marks. And your tits are sooo soft and your ass is sooo perfect and grabbable and your legs are so fucking nice and sexy.”

“Okay okay, you made your point.” Lux’s face grew warm as she tried to adjust how she was sitting. She was so weak to Jinx’s compliments.

“God, you're cute. When you get all embarrassed too. I love ruining you.”

“I said stooop.” Lux whined, hitting Jinx softly on the shoulder. Jinx grinned that smug shit eating grin of hers, but finally relented. 

“So, Ekko and Seraphine. That still leaves the fourth room unclaimed. I don’t really want to invite my sister and her girlfriend if we’re gonna be sleeping together, and even though she’s your ‘friend’ I don’t think Marcie would want to come with us. I don’t want her to at all actually. So that leaves…”

Jinx went silent for a moment, as if some awful realization had come over her and she couldn’t utter the words. Lux looked at her as she let her head fall down onto the steering wheel.

“I cannot believe I’m about to suggest this, but we should invite Ezreal.”

Lux’s eyes went wide, and it took a second of Jinx not laughing or saying ‘AS IF!’ to realize she was being serious.

“Ezreal. Like, our Ezreal. Like, Ezreal I used to almost ruin our relationship last night. The one who has a crush on me you can’t stand. That Ezreal.”

“He’s not- I mean he’s- I don’t know…”

She couldn’t believe it. Jinx was defending Ezreal. Who had replaced Jinx with this different version of her? The hair and everything!

“He and I had a heart to heart earlier today, actually. He came by my place to apologize for his part in everything last night. It turns out, he’s actually not that bad. I mean we knew this but, he told me he was putting on a whole frat boy persona, but he just seems like a lonely guy who doesn’t fit in. I guess hearing him say it, he kind of reminded me of myself. Like, a version of me who never transitioned and never connected with the people around me. I mean fuck I’ve still barely connected with the people around me. Not that I think he’s a trans girl or anything, though he’s like 100% not straight I can tell you that. But, I don’t know, we spent an hour or so hanging out, and he’s not so bad. So, yeah, I think we should invite him.”

For a while Lux was speechless. Honestly she was proud of Jinx for being so amicable with him last night before everything happened, she’d never expected to hear the words coming out of her mouth. Part of her was nervous though. The sudden haircut, the way she was talking about Ezreal, that just didn’t seem right. When they parked in the garage, Lux put a hand on Jinx’s and made eye contact.

“Jinx, be honest with me. Do you actually want Ezreal to come along? You’re not just saying things to make me happy, are you?”

Jinx squeezed her hand, and Lux could feel the tremors. She hadn’t shot up last night. That was good. Lux had secretly been terrified Jinx would break the promise and it would all compound together. That did help her to believe Jinx was being honest, and this wasn’t some kind of fucked up way to appeal to Lux.

“I do actually want Ezreal to come along. I know it sounds ridiculous, but I felt like I saw a different side of him today. If we give him some time, he might be kind of cool. Though, if he keeps making horny puppy eyes at you, or if he even thinks of hitting on you, I’m drowning him in the ocean. Making horny puppy eyes at you is my privilege. But, for what it’s worth I don’t think he’ll be weird.”

Lux sat on it for a while, enjoying the feeling of Jinx’s calloused fingers brushing against hers.

“Alright, we’ll invite him too. Assuming we can convince them to go on a week-long trip with us with less than a day's notice. Can we all fit in your truck?”

Jinx turned to look behind the front bench, and Lux did too. There was another bench, with significantly less room folded up against the back wall leading to the bed. Though, the space was filled with random things, empty coffee cups and take out bags, a car battery, some jumper cables… a spool of copper wire?

“Yeah, we can either have you slide up against me, put one of them on the window seat and the other two in the back, or all three of them should fit on that bench. I mean Ezreal’s the tallest person in the group, which is kind of embarrassing. Luggage is no problem, my bed has plenty of space. Gas is gonna be fucking rough though, that’s more than a few tanks.”

“Oh don’t worry about that, I’ll cover everything.”

Jinx paused, keeping eye contact.

“Babe, that’s a lot of money for gas.”

“Oh, no I’m covering everything. Gas, groceries, dinners, everything we do will be on me.”

Again, Jinx seemed to stutter, but before she could argue Lux cut her off.

“Jinx, my parents are incredibly wealthy. I mean wealthy wealthy. Every semester they give me a credit card that limits any purchases to a certain allowance for the semester. We’re halfway through and I haven’t even met a quarter of the budget. Let me do this for us. How else are we gonna convince everyone else to go? We take advantage of my parents money and use it to have a gaycation with our friends and fuck nasty in their beach house.”

Jinx shook her head and laughed, shrugging with a goofy smile on her face.

“Fuck it, yeah. Your parents are paying.”

--

Luxanna_C Created the Chat: Gaycation

Luxanna_C Added to Gaycation : G3t_J1nxd , Serabear , guitar_hero , xX_Lightfeather_Xx

//Lux: Hey guys it’s Lux. So, a crazy idea that Jinx and I had. The two of us are driving into Shurima tomorrow to spend the rest of break in Tereshni. My family's beach house has 4 rooms, soooo would any of you guys want to come with us? It’s super last minute so sorry but I’ll cover any of our costs. We hadn’t decided if we’re coming back Monday or Tuesday so we can figure that out once we know who all is coming? Jinx is driving and her truck has enough space for us all.//

//Seraphine: AHH OMG YEssS! Wait I literally have to check my schedule because like I’d been invited to a party by my roommates so like I have to make sure they don’t need me to be there but if they don’t yes! That sounds so fun oh my gods (>W<) <3 (OoO) *\o/* beach babes!//

//Ezreal: Did u guys add me by mistake? Or is Jinx pulling a prank on me?//

//Jinx: Ur being invited bro, if you say no I will kidnap you//

//Ezreal: Dam//

//Ezreal: I guess Im coming then :0 I’ll start packing rn//

//Jinx: o7

//Jinx: Ekko i know ur ass is free you better be on board//

//Ekko: Ey you don’t know shit J//

//Ekko: Yeah I’ll prolly come along, wth not? @Luxanna_C assuming u serious about paying?//

//Lux: 100% serious//

//Ekko: Fuck it, I’ll be there//

//Seraphine: GAAASP OMG Jinx Lux this must b ur guys first trip as a couple!! Should I bring noise canceling headphones? ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)//

//Lux: Don’t be gross Sera!//

//Jinx: Yes//

--

//Ezreal: So, you and Jinx made up?//

//Lux: Yeah. She said you and her had a conversation earlier?//

//Ezreal: Mhm. Clearing the air between us. Glad to hear things are okay, I would have felt rotten if I was a part of ruining something. Thanks for inviting me on the trip, I promise I won’t be weird about anything. You guys are a couple and that's totally cool. No weird guy with a crush from Ezreal anymore. Sorry if I ever made you uncomfortable.//

//Lux: Apology accepted. You did, I’m not gonna pretend otherwise at this point, but I can understand making desperate choices when you’re lonely. I’m gonna hold you to that promise! I’d like to be friends if we can be, just normal friends. That’s what I wanted from the start.//

//Ezreal: Normal friends sound great. Honestly I think that’s all I wanted from the start too, just took some weird shit for me to realize it.//

//Lux: <3 I’ll see you tomorrow bright and early.//

//Ezreal: See ya then :D//

--

//Lux: Hey, do you mind if I ask you something?//

//Ekko: Sure. What’s up?//

//Lux: Sorry if this is out of line but//

//Lux: I mean there’s not much hiding it at this point, Jinx and I are dating. But does that bother you? I just don’t want things to be weird if we’re going to be together for a week. Jinx hasn’t really shared the details with me but, I get the sense the two of you used to be a thing.//

//Lux: I hope that isn’t offensive or I’m prying into your business.//

//Ekko: It’s alright, I understand your reasoning. For what it’s worth, no, that doesn’t bother me. Jinx and I haven’t been involved that way in years, I moved on a long time ago.//

//Ekko: I don’t really feel comfortable sharing the entire story if Jinx hasn’t told you, but I can tell you the basics. Jinx and I started dating around 4 years ago. Neither of us were ready for that relationship, her pops had just passed and Silco and I had butted heads for years. We were volatile, fought constantly, and broke up within a few months. It, among other things, nearly ruined our friendship. But like I said, it was years ago, and I’m not a bitter person. We’re cool now.//

//Lux: Ok cool, I’m glad to hear it. Sorry again, I’ve tried to get details from her before but, everytime I bring it up she gets agitated.//

//Ekko: That’s not surprising, it was a weird time in her life. She probably doesn’t seem like it to you, but Jinx is very slow to trust people. Yet she can be irresponsible with people she doesn’t trust, especially in regards to her body. You might be an exception though, it seems like you could be good for her. I’m sure Jinx’ll tell you everything when she’s ready. Just don’t think less of me when she does, it was bad for both of us.//

//Lux: No promises, I’m obligated to side with Jinx :p//

//Ekko: Ey that’s fair//

--

//Seraphine: Which of these bikinis looks sluttier I’m trying to pick//

Serabear shared 2 Images

//Lux: Uh, probably the pink one. I can see more of… you know.//

//Seraphine: True it doesn’t hide much does it, haha! I’ll bring them both. I’m still debating if I should tuck or let it hang. It’s such a cute vibe, but I don’t want to attract some beach bum chaser -_-//

//Lux: Right. If you want that kind of advice, Jinx would probably know more than me. I’m cis, you know?//

//Seraphine: Yeah but ur also more feminine than Jinx. We’re girl friends! I always ask my girl friends for slut advice, and I’m tryna get my slut on for this trip. If I leave Tereshni without finding some cutie to have a one night stand with, what was the point? Don’t worry I won’t bring them back to the house tho//

//Seraphine: Sorry, I hope I’m not making you uncomfy//

//Lux: No, it’s okay. I’m just not used to, well, slut advice. Actually, do you think you could give me some? I want to pick a swimsuit Jinx will like, but I’m kind of bad at shopping in public for things that aren’t modest. Get too embarrassed. If you went with me to pick one  I’d feel a lot better, and I could surprise Jinx.//

//Seraphine: YES!! Shopping trips are so fun, we’ll hit a beach shop right away and get you something so sexy Jinx will die on the spot, and you and I will be the undisputed trashy queens of the beach//

//Lux: Sounds fun :) Go easy on me though, this is all still new for me.//

//Seraphine: Babes, if we’re slutting out? We’re slutting out. We’re young and sexy! Take advantage of it while you have it girly//

//Lux: Jinx wants to offer her advice, can I show her those pictures?//

//Seraphine: ofc! Tell her not to make you jealous when she drools though (^3^)

--

“Well she’s definitely trans.” Jinx said, holding Lux’s phone up for examination.

“You still think she was that little boy you used to play with?”

Jinx shrugged, staring at the photo for a long time while they laid together in bed. They’d agreed to take two hours before they started packing.

“She’s got the same face I swear. But Seraphine doesn’t really read like a Zaunite, and he was definitely from Zaun. At first I thought if they were the same person she’d recognize me but, I don’t really look like I used to either. Plus this kid had brown hair, not pink. Do her roots look brown to you? I can’t tell.”

“Can’t tell, or you're coming up with an excuse to look at her in a bikini for longer.”

“Bit of column A, bit of column B.”

Lux rolled her eyes and took her phone back.

“Well either way you can ask her tomorrow. We’re gonna be in the same car for 8 hours after all. For now ,” Lux snaked an arm under Jinx’s hoodie, running her fingers over those tight abs and playing with the tip of her treasure trail. “We should make use of the time we have, you know. I can’t promise I’m still going to be okay having sex with other people in the house. Let’s have some fun now.”

She felt Jinx shutter just as much as she heard it, watching those tight jeans become just a little bit tighter. Plus Jinx was still shaking from everything, she wanted to help her calm down. Jinx had stopped shooting up for her after all, she wanted to take care of Jinx.

“That doesn’t sound like a bad idea. What did you have in mind?”

Lux smirked, and lowered to her knees off the side of the bed, pulling Jinx with her so she was sitting at the edge.

“Our favorite.”

Her reddit advice posts were right, giving your partner a blowjob after a fight was the best way to be sure she wasn’t still mad at you.

-- 

They’d decided to sleep at Lux’s, since they had to drive back out there to pack her stuff up, so Seraphine was their first pickup. She rushed out of her apartment eagerly, clad in a pair of daisy dukes that barely made it up her hips and were far too short and a K/DA crop hoodie, showing off a cute navel piercing that hadn’t been present in her photos the night before.

“Hi guys! OH Jinx I looove the hair.” She ran up and gave them each a hug and a kiss on the cheek, which Lux was slowly becoming more comfortable with, and maybe just a bit more like Jinx in her enjoyment of it. “Thank you so much for inviting me, oh my gods I’m so excited. My bags are kind of heavy, do you think you could help me bring them out, Jinx? It’s the first second door on the left once you go past the entrance room. Pet Apple Butter while you’re there, he’ll be excited to see you again.”

“Yeah, sure that’s cool.” 

Jinx walked inside and Seraphine turned to smile at her.

“Soo, you excited? I’ve already got some ideas for matching swimsuits. I’m thinking gold microkinis.”

Seraphine clearly saw the way she blanched, because she giggled and bumped their shoulders together.

“I’m joking. I mean, we would look amazing in those, but that’s probably too much for you in public. Private pools though, we should totally consider doing that.”

Oh, of course she was joking. Lux sighed with relief and smiled.

“I’m still not used to that. You’d think I would be with the way Jinx talks, but you two have completely different energies when talking about sex or being sexy.”

Seraphined smiled, genuine and honest.

“If it’s ever too much, you can let me know. Seriously, I will tone down the sluttyness to whatever you’re comfortable with. I just enjoy getting to be open about this sort of thing with other girls. Call it a privilege of transitioning, I guess. I was way too shy to be honest like this with other girls in high school, sooo I’m making up for it now. If you're okay with us sharing that is.”

Now that she thought about it, Lux had also had a very limited feminine camaraderie in high school. All of her friends came from similarly repressed families, and even when it came to dating, talking about sex or even making out was always incredibly hush hush, and never with proud confidence. The girls she played volleyball with were far more open with themselves, but Lux’d been way too afraid to try and get close to them. Not to mention, she could barely find it in her to look at them when they were together in the locker rooms. Now it was obvious why.

But here, a young woman her age was also looking to find that connection she hadn’t had the chance for. And she wanted to explore herself at a safe pace, right? Having a friend she could talk about sex, romance, or their bodies with was probably just the thing she needed. She couldn’t only talk to Jinx, and she’d be caught dead before talking to Ezreal about that.

“It’s not too much, just new. But I think I’d like to have someone to talk about this with. So, you can go all out slutty with me, and I’ll try to let myself be slutty with you.”

Seraphine grinned ear to ear and gave Lux a hug, and at the same moment Jinx exited the apartment with a heavy looking suitcase.

“Fuck you weren’t kidding about this being full.” Jinx said as she hefted it down the deck stairs and to her truck.

“Yep, sorry I’ve got a ton of outfit changes for whatever activities we do. I’ve got chilling in the house fits, clubbing fits, beach babe fits, late night bar fits, you name it. I’m sorry to say but I’m going to be the sexiest bitch in this city.”

“No complaints here.” Jinx grunted as she hefted the case up and deposited it onto the truck bed. 

Ezreal was next, not on campus but still in Piltover. He was wearing those jeans he loved so much (Jinx informed her quietly that he’d also worn them the day prior, leading to speculation on whether he wore the same ones or if he had multiple pairs of the same maroon jeans) and a tank top featuring some surf shop logo. Unlike Seraphine, he was carrying his two small bags himself.

“What’s up, party people!” He cheered as he and Jinx loaded his bags. Seraphine echoed with a whoop from in the truck. Jinx had to futz a bit with the front bench in order to give Ezreal room to climb in the back, but eventually they found a way.

“I didn’t say this last time but this truck rocks, Jinx.” He said. “I love the red interior.”

“Right? Looks like something out of an old porno. This is a Lenare Scorpion, she’s an uncommon but classic light pickup. Her name’s Vyx. Y’know, like the brothel? She’s a bit old, I found the poor girl about to be totalled after the rich asshole who bought her nearly ruined her. I begged my sister to buy it off the scrap shop so I could fix it up, because how could I not? It took a lot of work and even then I didn’t get her running until about 2 years ago. She’s going strong though, barely any miles either. I guess the dude who bought her didn’t touch her much, it was more of a flashy buy for him not realizing that light trucks like this are meant for people who actually work for a living and need pickups for their work. She’s in much better hands now, aren’t you baby?”

Vyx did not answer, though by the way Jinx ran her hands over the steering wheel, you’d think the truck was her girlfriend, not Lux. Not that a truck was making her jealous, it was more cute than anything. Jinx got like this with lots of her projects, and the ones she owned were even more personal. Fishbones and Vyx just happened to be at the top of her charts. Which meant Fishbones was her boytoy and Vyx was her dirty milf, in Jinx’s own words. One a gift from Silco, the other a gift from Vi. Jinx’s primary familial influence, but far from her only ones. Just the ones who were there long enough to impact her, it seemed.

“Fun fact about the Scorpion, it’s actually a model jointly manufactured by Lenare Auto and Azirite Industries. The parts come imported from Shurima, the engineering design and construction from Zaun, and they sold them together. Though, the companies haven’t worked together since, so this bad girl was probably made about 20, maybe even 30 years ago. Pretty awesome I know, what luck that the idiot who bought her had no idea what a nice piece he had collecting dust until he crashed her.”

From there, Jinx had all the opportunity she needed to start talking about trucks, the history behind them, the difference between them, why Demacian truck models were so stupid (“They don’t need to be that big! It serves no purpose, it makes it harder to drive and it has the same exact bed space as a compact model like mine! Light trucks are for people who actually do blue collar work, Demacian models are for old men who have to compensate.”) and as much trivia as she could yap about. Lux didn’t mind, she always liked to listen to Jinx rant about her interests. This was the first time really though that she was being herself around Seraphine and Ezreal it seemed, or at least the part of her that loves to talk for hours on end. Thankfully neither of them seemed annoyed, Seraphine checked out the moment they started talking about trucks, and Ezreal seemed to be at least semi-interested. Though apparently his interest in cars tended towards sports and muscle cars. How unsurprising.

Ekko was next, and it was the first time Lux had been to his place. From the looks of it his apartment was part of a small clump of housing pressed down into a fissure crevice surrounding an enormous tree. Lux hadn’t seen very much greenery in Zaun, or at least natural looking and not man made, so seeing it was pretty impressive.

“This is where the Firelights live.” Jinx said, and continued before Lux could be confused. “People in Zaun need community more than anything, like I said in my presentation. We have to band together and support each other when faced with all the problems forced on us. The Firelights are more than just a punk band, they're a gang. Ekko founded them to protect people who were victimized by drug violence in Zaun or police oppression in Piltover. This slum is their little pocket of safety, so to speak. If any shimmer dealer or enforcer sets foot here, they’re almost certain to get run out, or worse.”

Jinx didn’t need to fill in the blanks for Lux to realize she knew that from experience.

“Pretty cool.” Ezreal said, craning his neck to see the tree. “He and I have only ever hung out around town, never at one of our places.”

Jinx raised an eyebrow. “You and him hang out often?”

Lux could practically feel Ezreal stammer out his excuse.

“Uh- I-I mean yeah he’s awesome, and super nice, and he’s like a badass punk rap artist. Why wouldn’t we hang out? There’s nothing wrong with that.”

“Didn’t say there was.” Jinx said it with a hint of a venomous grin, he had fallen for her trap. The two of them had secretly bet on the chance of Ezreal coming out before the trip was over. 10 bucks, Jinx on he comes out, Lux on he doesn’t. Jinx was trying to rig the game.

Not that she cared really, if anything she wanted Ezreal to be comfortable and happy with who he was. She was just calling the math how she saw it, he was deep in that closet. Unless him and Ekko ended up sleeping together on the trip, there was no way he was coming out

Ekko met up with them in a pair of cargo shorts and a compact fitting Firelights crop top, a big duffle bag on his shoulder.

“Looking fine, lover boy.” Jinx said as the two fist bumped.

“Looking good yourself, that's a nice cut. Though, I should’ve brought my jacket until we got out of town. It’s gonna be warm in Tereshni, right?”

“Supposed to be between 60 and 70s Perfect for light wear or middling clothing.”

“Good, I only packed shorts. Hey Lux, long time no see.”

“Hi.” She said with a wave. “It’ll be nice to hang out some more, we haven’t talked since the concert.”

“And now you’ve all got me for a whole week, the only non-student in the pack. Thank gods you're paying, I’m not getting PTO for this trip since you told me yesterday. My boss was pissed man. But it’s a part time job who really gives a shit.”

“Hell yeah.” Jinx said, taking his duffle and slinging it into the bed. That was everything, she wrapped and secured a tarp over the bed to keep everything nice and snug for the trip, and then Ekko squeezed back to sit next to Ezreal.

“What’s up man.”

“Hey Ekko.” Ezreal said it with a little too much enthusiasm. Despite Ezreal moving over in the back to give Ekko room, Ekko sat practically right up against him. Seraphine turned back and held her hand out for him.

“I’m Seraphine, we haven’t met but I'm a huge fan of your music. Chrome Street Corpses literally speaks to my soul, you’re such an amazing vocalist.”

“Hey thanks, always glad to meet a fan of our work.” Ekko was visibly surprised by the compliment. He probably wasn’t used to basic pop girls praising his very personal work about growing up a Zaunite, and acknowledging those in your community who don’t make it. It was a good song, though Lux couldn’t relate to it the way Jinx seemed to. An experience she didn’t have.

“That reminds me of something.” Jinx said, as they pulled out of the fissure slums and began their 8 hour car ride. “Seraphine, are you from Zaun? I’ve never heard someone from Piltover say anything like that about Ekko’s music. Not in a way that they mean it at least.”

Jinx was probing to see if she was right about Seraphine, rather than asking her straight up.

“Mhm, well sort of. My Dad’s a song writer and audio mixer, he started out working for jazz lounges in the Promenade and DJing nightclubs in the Entresol. That’s where he met my mom, she’s a singer. Not very known, she sang local places on live music nights while working for a law firm. The two met and had me, and I grew up in the Promenade for 5 years. But by then my Dad had hit a break repairing sound equipment for more popular musicians, and used the money to purchase a studio in Piltover to give me a safe place to grow up. We moved right away into an apartment connected to the studio, so I spent most of my childhood topside. But I’ve always felt a connection to Zaun because of it, I’m just as much a Zaunite as I am Piltovan. Once I start performing my own music I want to write about those experiences.”

Jinx hummed in understanding, and both her and Ekko seemed to listen with a respect they hadn’t before. Even if for a little, it seemed Seraphine understood what it meant to live in Zaun. That gave a connection that no one else could understand but Zaunites.

“This is going to sound crazy but… Do you remember, when you were still living in Zaun, was there a little boy you used to play spaceships with behind Grimes Comic Shop? There was that little tanbark patch that was supposed to be for a construction crew, but it must have been abandoned, so someone set some metal piping in for a makeshift jungle gym and swing?”

Seraphine’s eyes went wide and her jaw dropped. She looked like she’d just seen a ghost.

“How do you know that?” Then before Jinx could answer, Seraphine’s eyes flickered up to Jinx’s hair, her natural blue hair. That must’ve been enough to make the connection. “No!” Her voice was full of disbelief.

“Yeah.” Jinx laughed with an enormous smile.

“That was you? Oh my gods, what are the chances? Jinx this is awesome!”

The two of them set off right away, talking about old stories from when they were little and how Seraphine had begun her transition a few years before Jinx, but they still both started within similar time frames. As happy as Lux was for the two of them, it was more a conversation for just the two of them, happening through Lux, in between them on the bench. She liked being pressed up close to Jinx, but eventually she had to turn around and join Ekko and Ezreal's conversation.

She was only a little jealous that Jinx had deep friendship connections with two of the people on the trip, both of whom she'd expressed attraction towards.

Before she knew it, Jinx’s truck was passing the sungates, and Lux got her camera out to take shots of it as they crossed the bridge to Shurima. Luckily, it only took about 30 minutes to make it through customs. You could still tell that Jinx was experiencing withdrawal symptoms if you looked closely, her hands trembled and Lux could tell she was experiencing a headache. She was determined for them to have this trip though, and it must not have been obvious enough for them to be searched. Which was very good, because Lux silently suspected there was a vial of shimmer somewhere in the truck that Jinx had forgotten about at some point. 

At the second hour mark they stopped for gas, and the gang unloaded from the truck to stock up on drinks and snacks from the connected corner store. She had to admit she had a bit of smug satisfaction when she paid for everyone's snacks and the gas at once on one card, but it was quickly squashed by the squinted eyes of the cashier, giving them each a look over, one at a time.

Once they were back in the truck, everyone but Lux started laughing.

“She totally thought we were a polycule!” Jinx belted.

Seraphine cut in, “And she thought Lux was our sugar mommy, oh my gods!”

“She’s gonna go home and tell her husband ‘Bertrand I saw a gaggle of them queers at work today.’” Now it was Ezreal talking. No one acknowledged the elephant (his sexuality) in the room, just laughed with him all the same.

“It’s not funny.” Lux protested weekly.

“I bet she’s gonna message all her middle class facebook karen friends and complain about the youths these days and their gay hippie communes.”

Lux’s only recourse was to fume on her own for a minute, because her embarrassment only earned more laughs from the group. About 30 minutes later, she had to admit that it was really funny.

3 hours in they made it to the ferry, and spent an hour sailing the cape. Lux got seasick and nearly lost her lunch overboard, but thankfully it passed. At least the ocean was utterly stunning.

4 and a half hours in, they had just passed Bel’zhun, and stopped to admire some of Shurima’s natural landscape, gorgeous as it was. Lux got some amazing shots of the desert road crags and a few group selfies of them making silly faces or poses against the sandy, rocky mountains. Then they were driving the coast, enjoying the greener shores bordering those lovely badlands.

7 hours in they stopped and had dinner at a roadside pub, where they had the best Shuriman food that Lux had ever tasted. They all ordered different dishes and tried a bite of every option, and it was a unique and fantastic assortment. Lux’s favorite had been what she ordered, Sandswimmer Cinnamon Flatbread, sweet and savory and perfectly filling. Jinx told her all about Sandswimmers while they ate, apparently they were apex predators out in the deserts away from the coast. Seeing pictures of them did not make them any less delicious.

Then finally, after a total of 8 hours and 42 minutes, they pulled up to the beach house. It was big, and separate from any of the buildings nearby it. Of course the Crownguards wanted a secluded property, two floors at least to separate the children upstairs but plenty of room in the living space, kitchen, and furnished basement.

“Here we are.” She said, and Ekko whistled.

“I know you were rich Lux, but I didn’t realize you were this rich.”

“It’s a blessing, and a curse.”

“So,” Jinx said as they began filing out of the truck, tired from the experience and sore from sitting. “How do we get in?”

“There’s a key inside, but the front door is certainly locked. But my parents never realized the latch on my window upstairs never locked into place. I may have used that to sneak out, just once, and even then it was only to walk to the edge of the beach at sunset our last year visiting. Someone just has to give me a boost up to the back deck, I’ll climb in the window and go unlock the front.”

“No problem, let’s go. Can y’all start getting our bags up to the door?”

Her and Jinx circled around to the back as the other three agreed, and Lux was feeling a strange sense of nostalgia.

“I haven’t seen this place in years.” She said under her breath. Even now she could picture her and Garen chasing each other in circles outside. Garen had found a stick and was pretending to play knights, but Lux had found her own and wanted to play witch school instead, and they would always argue. Jinx heard her words though, eyeing the structure as they walked.

“If it’s weird to be back, we could always get a hotel?”

“No, it’s fine.” She said, “It's just going to be strange sleeping here tonight. And, in my parents' bedroom.”

“Oh, don’t worry baby. We’re gonna make that room ours .”

Lux blushed furiously and pressed up against Jinx, who copied the gesture back. She loved this, loved getting to do this. They had left as early as they could to get everyone up, so it was coming on 6 as they stood behind the house. It wasn’t that far from the beach, and they could see the town itself and the beach it connected to. Here she was again, watching the sun set in the horizon on this beautiful place. Only she wasn’t alone this time.

“Here, turn and face the house for me?”

Jinx did, and Lux tried to frame her phone the way she would her camera. Jinx stuck her tongue out and flipped the camera the bird, and Lux took a picture laughing in the sunset, pressed together and smiling. It was a gorgeous photo, even if Jinx was being vulgar.

As Jinx examined the deck to look for the best spot to boost her up, Lux quickly and quietly changed her phone background to that photo.

“I’m thinking we use this little mound here, I think there’s probably a septic tank under it. I’ll give you a toss and you’ll climb up the gap in the rail?”

“Works for me, just don’t drop me, okay?”

“Promise.”

It was a bit unwieldy, but Lux practically weighed nothing in Jinx’s arms, another very nice side effect of her surprising physical strength. Though as her hands grasped around the white wooden rails, Lux had to summon every inch of core strength she had to shimmy up onto the deck. Thank gods she’d started playing volleyball again, even for just a few practices it had given her a little bit of her previous athleticism. 

“How’s the view from up there?” Jinx called.

“Pretty nice, can’t wait for you to see it.”

“Eh, I don’t know if it would beat the view I just got of you wiggling your ass around above me in those high waisted shorts of yours.”

She was so vulgar so often. Lux loved it. She decided to pay Jinx back by pulling her shirt and bra up and flashing her tits to Jinx, which seemed to stun her before Lux retreated to the window, giggling as Jinx called her a dirty cheat. To her luck, the latch slid open just how she’d expected it too, and Lux crawled through the space. Inside blue seashell print covered the walls, and a twin size bed was nestled against the wall. A vanity was against the other wall, and as Lux flicked the lamp on, she realized there was a necklace sitting on it. A little thing she must’ve forgotten here years ago, a little silver chain that connected to a golden anchor. She couldn’t even remember where it came from.

She pocketed it and decided to stop wasting time. As expected the house was pretty much exactly as she’d left it when she was 16. Lux thought it was very valiant the way she didn’t get caught up on how cold and lifeless it looked, forgotten and unused. No, she’d reflect on what happened to things her parents grew bored of when she didn’t have guests waiting for her outside. 

When she opened the door for everyone, Lux took a step back and swept her arm out towards the interior.

“Welcome to the Crownguard residence, under new management.”

Everyone clapped and Seraphine gave another excited whoop as they began transferring everything inside. The room arrangements were settled very quickly, Lux and Jinx were taking the master bedroom on the first floor, Seraphine would take Lux’s old room, Ekko would take Garen’s room, and Ezreal took the spare.

When she and Jinx were alone properly, with their bags in the big empty closet and the door closed, she found herself wrapping her arm around Jinx. Jinx must’ve understood, because for a long time she just held Lux, arms wrapped around her and Lux’s face buried into her neck. She always knew how to comfort Lux, even when Lux couldn’t find the words to express what was upsetting her. Their phones notified them that Ekko and Ezreal were going to take the truck to get groceries (Ekko had permission to drive it), but neither of them noticed. 

It wasn’t too long before comfort turned to giddy desire, and Jinx was paying a giggling Lux back for her stunt outside. When Seraphine heard the first obvious spank, she was very grateful she had actually packed her headphones.

Their first vacation together had officially begun.

Chapter Text

Jinx

--

Jinx didn’t think she would ever get tired of waking up in the same bed as Lux. Especially when they slept together naked after fucking like dogs in heat to the point of exhaustion. In the past she’d always had trouble sleeping, regardless of if she were alone in bed or not. Even when she was a kid, she couldn’t count the number of times she’d been too scared to sleep because of the nightmares, and she’d need Vi or Silco to stay with her until she’d finally fall under.

That was starting to change, little by little, in a way that Jinx wasn’t sure how she felt about. Lux was always so warm and so soft and it was hard to stay awake when she was so relaxed and safe with her Blondie in her arms. The waking up was even twice as nice when Lux would wake up first, yawning as she got up from the blankets and stretching before the day. This instance was particularly nice because Jinx got a front row seat to Lux stretching naked.

When Lux realized Jinx was obviously watching her, she rolled her eyes.

“You’ve seen me naked plenty of times now.” She said with amusement.

“And? Just because you’ve seen something beautiful before doesn’t mean it stops being beautiful the next time you see it. I don’t think anything could make me look away from this.”

“Ridiculous.” Lux muttered under her breath, but she was clearly smiling, and when she bent down to touch her toes, Jinx suspected she was just trying to show off her ass. Lux clearly noticed the way Jinx shifted the covers beneath her, and gave Jinx very knowing eyes.

They were the last ones to leave their room that morning.

“Good morning!” Seraphine said in that peppy voice of hers. She was lounging on the living room couch, wearing a pair of loose looking sweatpants and that K/DA tank top she’d had when they first met. Jinx really had trouble stuffing her jealousy over those tits down, Hrt had clearly granted Seraphine miracle C’s at least, where they had given Jinx crumbs at most. The jealousy did fade with the fact that Seraphine always seemed more than happy to show them off. Her hair had been down every time they met before, but now she had it up in a very fluffy ponytail. Up like this, she could see just the hint of natural brown in her roots.

The smell of cooking took her attention away, and through the door she could see Ekko and Ezreal in the kitchen, apparently making use of those groceries from yesterday.

“Morning.” Lux said, taking Jinx’s hand and leading her to sit together on the love seat.

Jinx grunted her own tired greeting, morning sex or not she did not do well this early.

“You two seem like you had a fun night.” Seraphine said, with a knowing grin. The hickies on Lux’s neck certainly didn’t hide anything, but they were all adults, everyone was well aware what the two of them would be doing.

“Very fun.” Jinx answered, ignoring Lux’s dirty look. An arm around Lux seemed to ease the wound.

“What are those two making?” Lux asked.

“Breakfast Burritos, I think? They had started before I even came out here.” She said it as her attention went back to her phone, where she obviously took a selfie for whatever social media. “So Lux, you and I need to hit up a shop before we go to the beach today, I figure after breakfast we could go? There’s one we could walk to on the edge of town I saw.”

Lux had a very strange reaction, Jinx thought, as her voice sounded anything but casual.

“Oh! Yeah, that sounds great. What do you need from there?”

Seraphine’s pained expression only confirmed Jinx’s theory. The two of them were up to something, and Lux wasn’t doing a good job at hiding it. She could probe them for what they were actually doing, but there was little need to do so in reality.

“I just wanted to look at souvenirs. Maybe see if they had some shirts or a hat or something, that’s all.”

Seraphine was a much more believable actor, so Jinx decided to play along.

“Oh yeah, you’ll find plenty of that junk in town.”

She could feel the way Lux relaxed under her arm, and Jinx decided to save her by grabbing the tv remote and turning it on. The TV was huge, but it seemed like it only followed local channels as she flipped through. Definitely a TV that stuffy losers like Lux’s parents would pay for. News channel, tourist info channel, movie marathon channel, cartoons. She settled on a college women’s volleyball game, which made Lux smile and elbow her. Jinx had begun following it so that when she watched Lux play official games (which Lux would remind wasn’t certain to happen, since she didn’t know if she would be joining her rec team) she would understand what was happening. 

Lux was a Libero, the defensive return specialist, so she always took special note to watch them play. The way they’d dive and jump right back up to get in the path of another incoming spike was very impressive. She vaguely remembered Vi mentioning that Caitlyn was a very good spiker, which made Jinx wonder if Lux’s and Caitnlyn’s teams might meet in official tournaments. It would be very satisfying to watch Lux’s team beat Caitlyn’s team, she thought. And she certainly wouldn’t mind getting to watch Lux run around and sweat in one of those cute little uniforms.

She’d have to bring that one up to Lux later, maybe when she had a uniform they could disgrace.

“Breakfast is ready!” Ezreal called from the kitchen, and all three of them got up to join the boys+. 

It really smelled fantastic, Jinx was already salivating as she stepped in to see their masterpiece.

“Bon appetit.” Ekko said, as he set a plate of small burritos, the tortillas clearly fresh and lightly toasted. “Each one has sausage, eggs, cheese, avocado, and homemade corn salsa.”

“My salsa recipe, might I add.” Ezreal said, striking a dramatic pose as he leaned against the stove. “Learned it from a chef in Ixaocan. I know I know, don’t be too impressed.”

“Oh, so if these suck I know who to blame.” Jinx said as she took a seat.

“Mmmm these look sooo good. What’s the calorie count on them?” Seraphine said, rubbing her hands.

Ezreal and Ekko looked at each other and each one shrugged in turn. Seraphine deflated in front of them.

“Oh. I’m totally gonna have to treadmill this week off when we’re home.”

It didn’t stop her from taking two right away.

To their credit, they were delicious, and Jinx had to appreciate the specific tangy flavor of the salsa.

“The secret is the ratio. You need the correct balance of corn, jalapenos, diced onion, and lime juice.” Ezreal said, when she complimented it, elated that the group enjoyed the food. When they finished eating Seraphine practically dragged Lux out the door to whatever their secret plot was. The group agreed over text that if Jinx, Ekko, and Ezreal went to find them a spot on the beach, the two others would meet them there when they finished shopping. Jinx’s swimsuit wasn’t terribly exciting, unlike Seraphine she wasn’t incredibly comfortable wearing a bikini bottom with her bulge showing, and Jinx hated tucking more than anything. So she’d decided on a simple black bikini top  and a pair of dark purple swim trunks. The top did show off her piercings through the fabric though, which she felt was a win.

She took one look in the big bathroom mirror before rejoining Ezreal and Ekko, and a shred of embarrassment suddenly hit her. She didn’t really go to the beach very often, and what little river swimming she’d done in Zaun had always been with the other sun deprived street kids in Zaun. Her body was pale as a corpse, and she was going out onto the beach with everyone else, who all looked like normal healthy people. She was the outlier, thin and stringy and damaged. She wouldn’t be able to use concealer if she wanted to go in the water, her track marks would be visible to anyone who looked at her.

It would be such an obvious disparity. Her, the obvious drug abuser next to Lux, her beautiful perfect girlfriend. How Lux wasn’t embarrassed to be seen at all with her was a mystery. Maybe she could flake, tell everyone the burritos hadn’t agreed with her stomach and hide here in the room.

A knock on the door pulled her out of her spiral.

“We got everything packed, you coming?” Ezreal’s voice.

Jinx sighed, stepping away and trying to push her withdrawal spiral away. It would be fine once Lux joined them, they could just have fun and relax and not think about anything else. God she needed a hit. Maybe she could find a dispensary, weed was legal in Tereshni after all.

Ekko was wearing a pair of gray trunks that had some kind of fiery orange pattern on one side, and he had the beach bag slung over his shoulder, packed with towels, sunscreen, and a few other things. 

Ezreal, to her surprise, was actually wearing a sleek black and blue wetsuit, making him look even more like some twinky surfer.

“I should’ve gone with them to the store.” He said, zipping up their lunchbox with drinks, sandwiches for lunch, and other snacks. “I forgot I don’t have a board anymore, I’ll have to rent one for the week.”

“You surf?” She had thought the tank top yesterday was more for fashion than actual brand rep.

“Yeah, I haven’t in a few years though. You can’t in Piltover really, the beaches are too rocky, and everything else is the shipping docks and wharfs.”

She nodded with respect. “Cool, I always thought surfing looked really hard.”

“It’s just balance, you get the hang of it quickly.”

“You’ll have to teach me.” Ekko said as he walked out of the house, deciding that everyone was ready. They were, sandals clad and all.

“Y-Yeah yeah totally man, we should both go out and rent boards. I know Lux said she was paying for us but I’ll get those, no problem.”

Gods he was so obvious. 

“That sounds great, I’m looking forward to it.” Ekko said as he shot Jinx a look and a wink, and she rolled her eyes. She was totally getting those 10 bucks from Lux by the end of the week. Ekko was playing Ezreal like a fiddle.

They grabbed beach chairs on the way out, thankfully there were 6 the Crownguards had left in the small garage. The beach didn’t look too busy, and they managed to claim a nice spot, plenty of space but not totally isolated from the other beach goers. It was only a 20 minute walk from the house, but it was enough that Jinx was already feeling the sun beat down on her. She got to work with her sunscreen immediately, because a bitch with skin as nearly gray as hers needed a lot . Ekko laughed at her hardily, as he of course needed none, and she flipped him off while she rubbed and rubbed and rubbed. It was the highest spf they could find at the store before they left, water resistant and all.

She took a seat in her beach chair and stretched out, running a hand through her now shortened hair. More and more she was finding that she very much liked the new length, especially in the heat, as it was a little hotter than she’d thought. It would make swimming awesome too, her braids used to always get so crusted with sea salt or river grime.

Ekko and Ezreal went for the water right away, but Jinx didn’t want to until Lux was back. She’d just relax here for now, taking a beer from the cooler and reclining a bit. She occupied her free hand with a frisbee Ezreal had brought, tossing it up and catching it, or spinning it on one finger as she waited.

About half an hour later she heard footsteps, and Seraphine's voice calling “Oh! There they are!”

She stood up and turned to wave them over, and then Jinx’s eyes fell on Lux. All brain processors stopped at once and she practically froze as she stared. The breath left her body and time seemed to slow down as Lux walked closer.

Lux was wearing a light blue bikini, the top strapless and showing off a liberal amount of cleavage, and with a half-skirt of sheer fabric that hung from the bottom. A fashionable wide brimmed sun hat sat on top, and a pair of circle rimmed sunglasses hid her eyes. She looked like a goddess, something out of a movie, a beautiful high femme priestess who’d pull you in with her honeyed words and then push you to your knees with a single fluid motion.

As she got closer, it became obvious how Jinx was reacting, though, and she blushed a bit, both giddy and bashful. Her confidence didn’t quite match the aesthetic, but Lux was still enthused.

“Hi.” She said, giving a little wave.

“Hi.” Jinx finally said, staring like a complete idiot.

“I told you she’d like the surprise.” Seraphine giggled. She was wearing the pink bikini she’d sent a photo of to Lux, the top more than gracious with showing off her tits, both cleavage and sideboob. Jinx noted that Seraphine had decided not to tuck, and she respected that choice very much. It did look nice. The two of them must’ve gotten matching sun hats and sunglasses, because she wore the same exact ones, no doubt Seraphine’s idea. “You’re drooling Jinx.”

Jinx snapped back to attention, clearing her throat.

“You look really nice.”

“Thanks.” As Lux said it she crossed her arms behind her back and swayed in place, and Jinx thought she was going to die. “All of my swimsuits I had were really conservative and covering, and I wanted to get something that you’d like. Seraphine helped me, that’s what we were getting today.

“And clearly I did a good job, I’m sure the others will make you just as happy.”

Others. There were more.

Now she was certain she was going to die. Call a doctor, because Jinx was certain she’d be hard for longer than 4 hours.

“It’s really hot, It’s nice though. I’m gonna get burned, do you think you could help me put some sunscreen on?

What the fuck?

What the actual fuck?

She’d died and gone to shitty smut purgatory again, like that day at the wharf when she modeled for Lux.

“Yeah! Yeah of course, totally.” Jinx stammered, putting her beer down and tossing the frisbee onto her chair as she fumbled for the sunscreen.

“No fair.” Seraphine said. “You get to do the sexy sunscreen thing, but I’m here without anyone to do it to me? I’ll be right back, I’m gonna go catch a fish, I can’t not experience that.”

Then Seraphine was off, apparently nailing her fish within moments of casting the rod, as a taller scruffy looking guy with top surgery scars was quickly being enthralled by Seraphine’s bouncy pop bimbo routine.

“She’s something else, that only took a few moments for her to find someone.” Lux said, as she took her hat off and laid down on her stomach onto the throw they’d set out. Jinx was on her knees beside her in moments, suddenly feeling less like the more experienced one of the two and more like a fumbling virgin who was wrapped around the finger of an older woman. Jinx didn’t mind the image where the two of them were concerned.

“Yeah I mean can you blame the guy? If you’re single and some pretty trans girl with pink hair and an amazing body comes up asking you to spread sunscreen on her back, if you like women you gotta say yes. Like, talk about luck.”

Lux laughed, adjusting in place as she tipped her glasses down to make eye contact with Jinx.

“You’re lucky enough, don’t you think? You get me all to yourself.” Then she reached back and unclasped her top, exposing her back to Jinx. Fuck this woman was perfect. She could do so little and shut Jinx up with a few short little movements.

“Yeah, that is pretty damn nice.” Jinx said with a deep smirk. Then she got her hands to work, starting with Lux’s shoulders. Lux hummed at the contact, reaching back to move her hair out of Jinx’s way as she massaged the lotion in. “You really are unbelievably sexy in this.” Jinx said, swinging a leg over to straddle Lux’s back. Lux squirmed a bit in place, and Jinx felt immense pride as she realized that Lux was just as turned on as she was.

“I honestly can’t believe I’m doing this.” She whispered with a waver in her voice. “At first when Seraphine suggested this one I refused, it would be way too revealing. But then I thought about the way you would react, and I couldn’t help myself. But now everyone is going to be looking at me, I’m so exposed.”

“Well don’t worry.” Jinx said, moving her hands down to work Lux’s shoulder blades. Lux groaned in satisfaction, as this had quickly turned from rubbing sunscreen to an erotic back massage. “Everyone on this beach is going to know that you’re my girl. Everything you’re showing off? That’s for me. They can look all they want but that’s all they get. It’s like you said, I get you all to myself.”

“True…” Lux hummed a bit shyly, as Jinx shifted down and began to work at the small of her back, now straddling just above her butt. She had to resist the urge to grind against it, strong as the urge was.

“So, these other swimsuits Sera mentioned. I’ll enjoy those as much as I enjoy this one?”

“Well, just one other is a swimsuit, I bought two. The other is a different surprise for later. And you’ll enjoy it just as much, maybe even more.”

“Hard to believe.” Jinx grinned as she let her fingers drift softly over the sensitive skin where the back met the butt. Lux gasped at the sensation and tensed, and Jinx felt her legs suddenly kick a little bit. “I get to enjoy this as long as I want. The other one will have a lot of work to do.”

“I guess we’ll find out.” Lux said, turned back to wink at Jinx. Eventually she got all of Lux’s back, her legs, and her arms (with special attention to the ass) and Lux handled the rest. Seraphine rejoined them soon after they were down, waving back to the boy she’d roped along.

“Good sport?” Jinx asked.

“Mm, very good. I got his number, told him I had a thing for sexting. I’m expecting to get some packer pics later. Debating if I should give him my goods just as easily or make him work for it a little bit. He seems like the kind of boy who wants to earn his dinner.”

With all of them ready now they joined Ezreal and Ekko in the ocean. The water was cold at first, but quickly warmed up to match them. Jinx was honestly a bit surprised how much fun she had, all 5 of them out there, talking and horsing around as they enjoyed each passing wave. It was nice. Nice to just do something that normal college kids her age did, going on trips with their friends, laughing and swimming and playing on the beach. She didn’t have to worry about her life as a drug dealer, or disappointing her sister who would give up anything for her, or barely surfing the edge between passing and failing school, or the fact that eventually Lux would end up leaving her and returning to her life as a bird in a gilded cage.

No, for just a moment, Jinx was just allowed to smile, and laugh, and be happy.

--

After lunch they’d decided to toss their frisbee around for a while, which was fun, especially as it made them all realize how uncoordinated Seraphine was. She’d complain and say she went to the gym 3 times a week whenever she’d fail to catch the disc, but it was evident she only did cardio to maintain her figure. Jinx and Lux actually seemed the best at it, Jinx had spent a lot of her life fighting to survive and had never really lost the athletic instincts, and Lux was the only one of them who actually played sports beyond casually. 

Things took a turn when a stray volleyball suddenly struck Ezreal in the head.

“Oh shit, I’m sorry, you okay man?”

A deeper feminine voice called over to them, and the group (minus Ezreal who was rubbing his head) turned to look at the culprit.

It was a young woman, roughly their age, with tan skin and mane of shaggy brown hair. She was wearing a red and black surf suit almost similar to Ezreal’s, only the midriff was missing. Brown eyes were bracketed by a dusting of freckles that gave her an honest expression.

“Yeah, I’m fine.” Ezreal said, with a little bit of annoyance in his voice.

“Nice shot.” Jinx said with two thumbs up.

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to interrupt your game.”

“It’s okay, really.” Lux said, kicking the ball up into her hands. It was then that the group noticed that this girl had come from another group nearby, who were currently attaching a net to two poles that had been burrowed into the sand. Lux gasped.

“Are you guys setting up for beach volleyball?”

The girl grinned and nodded.

“Sure are. I’m Taliyah, nice to meetcha. My friends and I were just about to start some 2v2.”

Lux’s eyes were wide with excitement, and Jinx realized she was probably about to be pulled into something against her will. Oh well, a close up of Lux playing wouldn’t be bad.

“Do you need more people? I play normal volleyball, rec in PIltover. I’d love to play if you have the room.”

Taliyah hummed as she looked back at her companions, A gorgeous athletic woman a bit older than the rest of them with dark skin, lovely green eyes, and well kept dreads, a tall and pale broad shouldered man with wild black hair splotched with blue highlights closer to their age, and a young tan woman with hella thighs, with pretty white hair pulled partly into a ponytail, sporting some sharp looking makeup that made her eyes seem to glimmer in the sunlight. (Oh no, why were they all so hot!?)

“I mean I want to say yes but, we’d have an odd number of people. Unless some of your friends here want to join. Then we could play 4v4.”

Lux turned to look at all of them with the most pathetic wet cat eyes of all time. Jinx sighed and walked forward.

“Fine, I’m in.” 

“Yeah, count me in too.” Ekko said, dragging Ezreal over with him who was still grumbling about being hit in the head.

“OH I’ll be your cheerleader!” Seraphine yelled out with a jump. “Gooo team!”

Taliyah laughed, and got the volleyball as Lux tossed it back to her.

“4v4 it is. That’s Senna, Kayn, and Qiyana. You guys are on.”

--

“Ok, here’s the deal.” Lux said, undoing the sheer half-skirt as the 4 who were playing huddled up. Seraphine was not being a very good cheerleader and was off flirting up that boy she’d reeled in. Good for her. 

“I know you guys aren’t volleyball players but beach volleyball is a lot more unruly and chaotic anyway. Each of us covers a corner of the court, and the back right corner serves. We each rotate whenever it’s our turn to serve. We can only touch the ball 3 times on our side, not counting a block. When they spike at us, if I’m in the back I’m going to receive everything I can, but your goal is just to hit it up into the air if I can’t make it. Then someone else sets it as high as they can like I showed you, and the last person runs up to spike. Just run up to it, jump, and swing at it as hard as you can. Try and hit it into the lines we drew, yeah? If you’re in the front for their spike, jump and hold your arms straight up to try and block it. Though I’m gonna be honest, if it's Kayn spiking none of us are going to stop him, we just don’t have the height or the power. It’s fine, we’ll position ourselves so I’m always on the back line when he’s up front to attack, so I can receive his spikes. He’s the only one we can’t match midair, so for the rest we’ll have a good chance of wrestling a point or two from blocking. I know you guys aren’t experienced but I believe in us. You ready to have some fun?”

Jinx, Ekko, and Ezreal were more stunned than anything, and no one answered.

“I said, are you guys ready to have some fun!” Lux repeated louder.

“Yeah!” They replied to their sudden drill sergeant. Jinx had never seen this side of Lux before, the competitive athlete. She wasn’t exactly displeased being bossed around by the love of her life.

They’d decided to start with Lux serving in the back with Jinx covering the other back half, Ekko and Ezreal up front. That way Ezreal, being the tallest, could at least compete against Kayn and make it harder for him to cut clear shots. Even if Kayn was certainly an inch or 2 over 6 feet. Ekko and Jinx were the same height pretty much, but Jinx was physically the strongest, at least in terms of raw force. So this way the player with the most physical force (Jinx) reinforced the shortest player (Lux) while the tallest player (Ezreal) made a wall with their second tallest (Ekko or Jinx). Jinx wasn’t an expert but it seemed like a sound strategy. Despite only joining for Lux’s sake, everyone actually seemed fired up.

Only, the other 4 clearly played beach volleyball on the regular, and Lux was the only player on their team who even knew the rules in depth. They got crushed. Jinx kept tripping or stumbling clumsily when it came to anything other than spiking, Ekko didn’t have the muscles to block any of the other players, Ezreal kept getting flustered when ever Kayn would flirt with him when they met in rotation, and Lux was skilled at a technical position design to save points, not make them. Still, it was a lot of fun.

The two groups spent a bit of time talking after over drinks. Apparently Taliyah and Qiyana played on the same rec team and had met Senna playing at an international tournament in Demacia. Kayn was friends with Qiyana and played on a men's collegiate volleyball team. But they always met up around the same time for a week, Senna bringing her husband (darn) and the 5 hanging out. Lux got the numbers of Taliyah Qiyana and Senna, promising that the Sapphilite Row Area Women’s Rec team would beat them at the national women’s 21 and up recreational tournament this year, which Jinx took as meaning she had decided at that moment to become a full member of her team. Ezreal and Kayn also traded numbers, which seemed to grind Ekko’s gears a bit.

The first proper day of vacation ended with them relaxing on the couch after getting cleaned up from the beach, eating Ioanian take out and watching an on demand monster movie they’d managed to broadcast from Lux’s laptop to the T.V. Lux and Jinx decided they were too tired to do anything that night, but Lux informed her that Seraphine had successfully received tboy strap nudes, and that the boy had sufficiently earned tgirl nudes. They were going to hook up the next evening. Again, good for her.

Her and Lux fell asleep making out, slow and soft, enjoying the feeling of their skin pressed together.

--

Apparently not resolving any of the things that had happened during their beach time came back to bite Jinx when she woke up at 4 am painfully hard. A quick check showed her that Lux was sleeping peacefully beside her, looking like she didn’t have a care in the world. Her hair was splayed out on the pillow, and Jinx couldn’t resist leaning down to press her face in, taking a deep breath.

She wrapped an arm around Lux and pressed close to her, resolving to go back to sleep and ignore her problem until tomorrow. But then, Lux had to adjust. And then, she had to adjust. And, they always slotted so specifically into each other, and suddenly Jinx’s erection was rubbing against Lux’s ass. Call her a human but the sudden friction caused her to gasp very slightly in surprise, fighting to ignore just how good it felt to grind against Lux.

Immediately Jinx stilled, clutching Lux far too tight as she tried to ignore her arousal, listening to see if Lux had woken up. By the way her breath felt so deep, she didn’t. Realistically because they’d both agreed not to have sex, Jinx should’ve just stayed still and shut up and fallen back asleep.

But desperation filled her bones, and almost unconsciously Jinx began to grind again. She could feel the heat filling up her cheeks as she bucked slowly as she could, as to not wake Lux. The movements were automatic, and she was hardly awake in the first place. A shuddering sigh left her mouth as she moved, which was answered by a giggle.

A what?

Jinx’s eyes shot up and she froze.

“Why’d you stop?” Lux whispered. “You were making such cute sounds.”

Embarrassed swarmed Jinx.

“How long have you been up?”

“Since you put your arm around me. Sorry for not saying anything, I thought you were just going to sleep. Then you started grinding, and I wanted to see how far you’d go.”

“Are you mad at me?” Jinx whispered.

“No, it doesn’t bother me, I know you have a high sex drive, and it can strike you suddenly. If you ever need me to help, even if I’m asleep, I give you consent. There, see? We talked about it, just like we agreed to.”

Jinx gulped, still nervous as all hell.

“That’s a lot of trust in me.”

“I do trust you Jinx, I know you wouldn’t hurt me, or do something I don’t like. So you need to trust me when I tell you it’s okay. Even though I’d be asleep, now that I’ve agreed to it, I’m in control. And if I ever decide it isn’t okay, I’ll just say so.”

Jinx thought the logic was strange, but she was shut up when Lux turned to face her, a mischievous glint in her eyes.

“Would you like me to prove it? I’ll show you that I’m in control. I’ll prove that I trust you, and that you trust me?”

The tone in her voice was unavoidable, and Jinx’s voice shook a little as she spoke.

“What did you have in mind?”

Lux hummed happily as she sat up, pushing the covers off. Jinx moved to join her, but a hand suddenly pushed her back down. 

“Stay.” Lux ordered. “I’m in control now, baby.”

Fuck .

Jinx obeyed, watching with awe as Lux pulled her sleep shirt off, and shucked off her panties.

“We’ve talked about this before, but haven’t done it yet. I’m gonna sit on your face. You’ll be good for me and eat me out, won’t you?”

Oh gods. Oh fuck. Jinx nodded furiously, and Lux giggled.

“You’re always so eager for me. You like when I dominate you, don’t you baby?”

“Yes.” Jinx said, like a mantra.

“Good girl.”

Then the covers were shoved off completely, and Lux was stradling Jinx’s head, facing down towards the other end of the bed. Jinx took the opportunity right away to hook her arms around Lux to grab her by the ass, feeling up the soft skin of her thighs. Even though it was dark in the room Jinx’s eyes were adjusted fine, and she could see the slick and arousal of Lux’s pussy, slightly swollen the way she did when she was turned on.

“Did you really like having me grind against you like that?” Jinx asked, a little smug through her submission.

“Of course I did, baby.” Lux purred. “I love knowing how much you need me. You’ll be good and take responsibility, won’t you?”

Then without any further fanfare, she lowered herself down, sitting on Jinx’s face. Jinx opened her mouth and had her tongue read to press against her pussy, reveling in the taste of Lux’s arousal as she began to explore. She gladly let Lux shift her weight down onto Jinx’s face, breathing out with her own need as Lux pressed into her. God she loved this woman’s ass. Lux moaned softly above her as Jinx began to probe in long slow strokes, avoiding her clit and instead teasing her entrance. She managed to get away with that for a few minutes before Lux reached back to tug at Jinx’s hair.

“You’re playing coy.” She said as Jinx groaned. “Be good and eat me right, baby. Listen and you’ll get a reward.” Then she used her free hand to gently brush Jinx’s erection through her boxers, teasing the wet spot her precum had made. That was all the encouragement Jinx needed, and as she pulled back to take a shaky breath she turned all her focus on Lux's clit.

Lux moaned again, lower and sultry, pulling Jinx’s boxers down and taking Jinx in hand. Jinx stuttered beneath her, thrilled that the need she had built up was being given attention. Lux leaned down to take Jinx in her mouth, pulling off Jinx’s face for just long enough to lubricate Jinx, sitting right back down as she began to stroke Jinx in earnest.

It was heavenly, she was so lost in the taste of Lux and the soft skin of her ass and the weight of her. She wasn’t going to last long, not with how good this felt. Things only got worse when Lux reached her free hand to splay over the expanse of Jinx’s chest, and then gently began to circle and pinch Jinx's nipple.

Jinx moaned a muffle “Fuck!” as she lost control, and began bucking her hips into her owner's hand. Lux giggle again, holding tight to give Jinx something to fuck.

“That’s my girl.” She whispered. “So good and needy. Tell me when you’re going to cum baby.”

“Now! Now!” Jinx cried. Lux was off of her in seconds, and then Lux’s lips were around her. Jinx continued moving without a pause, fucking Lux’s throat like a pussy until she was spilling herself while being caressed by Lux’s tongue. Lux moaned from around Jinx’s cock, fulfilling her ever present oral use kink almost as a bonus.

It took a few seconds for Jinx’s finish to end, but they both knew they weren’t done yet. Lux pulled off Jinx’s cock and sat right back down, putting Jinx to work through her orgasm. It only took a few more minutes for Lux’s orgasm to crash into her, biting her lip so as not to scream and wake the others. Jinx loved the way she convulsed and shook on top of her, toes curling and thighs quivering. She gave Lux two more before enough was enough.

Lux fell back down to the bed beside her, panting and pushing her hair out of her face, and Jinx enjoyed listening to the way her breathing stayed fast for a moment, then began to slow, ever so gently. Jinx’s own heart rate made its way back down, and after who knows how long of laying in her bliss, she finally got up to wash her face off in the shower, cleaning herself below with a warm washcloth. She brought it back out for Lux, who thanked her in a small voice and got to her own cleanup while Jinx laid down.

Her arms felt like jelly, and things got so light and floaty as sleep almost took her, before Lux spoke up.

“That was good.” She said, curling up to Jinx’s side. Jinx raised her arm to let her in, running her fingers gently over Lux’s shoulder while she got comfortable.

“Yeah it was.” Jinx said with a grin. “I like this side of you a lot.”

Lux ran a finger down the crest of Jinx’s chest to her navel, and then back up to the dip of her neck.

“What do you mean by that?” 

Jinx couldn’t quite see her expression with the way Lux had settled her head, so she stared up at the popcorn ceiling as she thought the question over.

“Your dominant side. I like when you take control. I mean, I like getting to play the one in charge while you do your whole innocent church girl act, but I like feeling useful to you. I like when you need me to do things, and you tell me to do it, and I like when I do it right. It makes me feel like you’ll stick around.”

Lux pinched her just above the rib, and Jinx flinched. She suspected Lux was pouting.

“I’m not going to leave you anyway, dummy.”

“I know.” Jinx said, smiling and getting her revenge by pinching Lux at her hip. Lux made a cute ‘eep’ noise which Jinx would store for a night where they weren’t together and she was missing Lux. “I still like it.

“Actually,” Jinx continued. “There’s a lot of sides to you that I didn’t know about when we first met, y’know. I would have never imagined that the pretty girl who chased me down for a pencil likes to feel so utterly in control of me, sitting on my face and jerking me off while doing it. She pretended otherwise, but she’s got such a dirty mind, just as much of a pervert as me. And I would have never imagined that she gets so cute and competitive when it comes to her sport, or that she’s so passionate about her photography, or that she likes to wear cute swimsuits to give me something to look at. But, I love it all, every side of you I discover I love just as much as the first one I fell in love with, that fiery rich girl who couldn’t stand to be around a druggie rat. I think I could spend an eternity exploring you Lux. You’re… like a puzzle box. My own mechanical mystery. More than anything I want to solve it, not for me, but for you. I want to find all the parts of you that make you shine like sunlight, and I want to help you let them bloom.”

It took Lux’s silence after to really comprehend the words her sex and sleep-addled brain just spoke.

“Uh- Sorry was that a bit much? I know we’ve only been together for 2 months but I mean it’s true and- I- well…”

That was when Jinx heard Lux sniffle, and her heart dropped to her stomach.

“Shit Lux I’m sorry that was too much I-”

“Shut up.” Lux said through tears that had suddenly appeared. Then she laughed, a wet and desperate thing. She lifted her face to look at Jinx, and Jinx realized she was smiling while the tears trickled down her cheek. “Don’t you dare apologize for what you said. No one’s ever said something that kind to me before.”

Jinx’s heart broke a thousand times over, but she smiled as she placed her hand to Lux’s back and pulled in her as close as she could be.

“I love you too.” Lux said through a happy sob. “I love you just as much, you dummy. You better not decide the puzzle is ever boring, okay?”

Now Jinx wrapped her free arm to press Lux’s head against her chest, laying her cheek against Lux’s crown.

“Never.” She whispered, with all the truth she could manage.

--

The second day was much the same as the first, the group woke up early and went out for breakfast, spent the last morning to early evening at the beach (Ezreal made good on his promise and had begun teaching Ekko how to surf) and the group went out to a nice restaurant on the boardwalk for dinner. Seraphine split off from there with her new boytoy, being dropped off a few hours later at the beach house. “Best one night stand in a while.” She’d said when she limped her way into the house.

The third day (Friday, roughly half way through their vacation) the group decided to do something a little different. Rather than spend the day at the beach they would relax through the morning and afternoon in the house, and then go through a crawl through town in the evening. Tereshni had a very vibrant nightlife scene, and Seraphine wanted to visit a few bars and nightclubs. The town at night really was beautiful, a mix of historical Shuriman buildings and a section of Noxian architecture that had remained from the occupation. It seemed that while the historic section of town kept the quaint port aesthetic, the Noxian additions had widely become the entertainment center of the city.

The first club they’d visited was a strip club, none of them had realized, and despite Jinx’s attempts to convince everyone to go in with her, they skipped it. She’d have to introduce Lux to strip dancing a different way and store her fantasies for getting a lapdance from her girlfriend later.

The second club was far closer to what they were expecting, pumping music and a crowd of people going hard on a dance floor, drugs and alcohol all abound. Ekko pulled Ezreal in to dance with him almost immediately, and Seraphine followed after them, quickly attracting a small crowd of men and women to her energy. She’d seen from the look on Lux’s face that dancing in that crowd would be a bit much for right now, so the two of them found a secluded corner to share a drink. Honestly she appreciated the hideaway as well, away from everyone else, this way she could chain smoke her withdrawal symptoms away while Lux rubbed her back and comforted her the best she could. As much as she was trying to ignore them, they were getting worse. The rest of them all seemed to get a win though, Ekko and Ezreal were practically grinding on the dance floor, and Seraphine looked like a goddess surrounded by so many people dancing, no doubt soaking up the attention.

The next place they hit was called Butcher of the Sands, a smoky backstreet bar with a far more mature clientele than their last stop. It was a miracle, but they’d manage to secure 5 seats at the bar proper, where an enormous looking Crocodile Vastaya (At least, Jinx thought he was a Vastaya? He partly just seemed like an enormous Crocodile,) was polishing glasses. This huge bladed Shuirman weapon was hung on the wall behind him, which Jinx thought would fit in his hands very well.

The jazz piano playing over the speakers was nice and relaxing, and clearly Lux was far more comfortable in this environment. On another day Jinx would have preferred the chaotic hedonism of the nightclub, but right now the slower attitude was much more her pace. They were just finishing off their round of drinks and preparing to leave, when someone on the other side of the room caught Jinx’s eye.

She was taller than all of them, right around Vi’s height, wearing a ripped up white crop top with a pentakill logo and a fishnet top covering her abdomen and arms beneath it. A pair of black jean shorts revealed a single long leg curving down to thick combat boots, the other almost fully replaced with a complex mechanical prosthesis. Her hair was shaved on the sides, but kept long on the top, dirty blonde currently pulled into a knotted bun at the back. Beneath her piercing green eyes her face was mostly covered by a black gas mask, which exhaled a puff of steam with her breath. She wore fingerless biker gloves, her elegant fingers currently playing with the rim of a whiskey glass.

“Scratch!” Jinx called, causing all her friends (and really the whole bar) to look at her, and then to the woman. Scratch’s eyes flickered up from her drink, annoyance clear on her brow before she realized who had yelled for her. She got up from the booth and went up to them.

“Fancy seeing you here.” Scratch spoke through her mask, her voice metallic and heavy through her vocal augments. She put her fist out for a bump, and Jinx met it immediately. She turned her eyes to Ekko and offered him the same movement. “You too, wonder boy.”

Ekko was not nearly as pleased to see Scratch as Jinx was, from the furrow in his brow.

“Hey.” He said, hesitation obvious in his voice. Still, he returned the fistbump.

“Oooh.” Seraphine said now that Scratch was close. “Who is this ,Jinx?” She said, the tone in her voice made it very clear what she thought of Scratch. Scratch noticed too and her eyes flicked up and down Seraphine’s form. Obviously and publicly checking her out. Seraphine twirled a strand of hair on her finger.

“Guys, this is Scratch. She and I used to play in a band together. Though, I jumped ship pretty early in its career. You’re still playing though, right?”

“Yeah, playing and singing. Lethal Encore is doing good, with or without a bassist.”

“Hey it’s awesome to hear you’re singing again.” Jinx said, a bit sheepishly ignoring the bassist comment. “ You guys changed the name from Super Mega Death Rocket?”

“Yeah, that was kind of your thing. We’re a bit more serious, not as crazy without you around.”

Jinx just hummed. Honestly her and Scratch had started a band out of boredom more than anything. Scratch worked as a street level dealer for Silco since Jinx was 16(ish) and Scratch was only a year older. Naturally with no one else their age around, the two became friends. Though clearly Scratch felt far more serious about her music career than Jinx had. They were both users, though Scratch inhaled while Jinx injected. That’s why her vocal cords were so damaged, nearly to the point that she couldn’t sing anymore. The mask she wore was both her method for shimmer, and an aid to help her speak loudly. Her augments let her talk, but she needed a mini amplifier to be heard in loud spaces. 

“Well, what are you doing in Tereshni?” Jinx asked.

“Touring, we’re opening for Angel Killer. Good to get our name out there, y’know? How about you?”

“We’re on vacation, it’s Autumn break at the Academy.”

“Riight, forgot you got that scholarship thing. Good for you.” Despite her earlier tone, Jinx thought she meant it. She was just the kind of person who always sounded a bit bitchy.

Seraphine suddenly cleared her throat, obviously wanting Scratches attention again, so Jinx sighed.

“Scratch, this is Seraphine, Ezreal, and my girlfriend Lux. They’re students with me. Obviously you know Ekko.”

“Hii it’s so good to meet you.” Seraphine said, turning in her stool to face Scratch. “Your voice is sooo nice, I’d love to hear you sing. I’m a performer too.”

“Your voice ain’t so bad either, Songbird.”

Seraphine giggled way too obviously, and with a quick acknowledgement to everyone else Scratch and Seraphine began their own separate conversation, one which very quickly led to Scratches hand on Seraphine’s butt, though none of them brought it up or interrupted.

“Were you and her close?” Lux cut through Jinx’s thoughts as Scratch led Seraphine away to a dart board, where they would no doubt play the most sexually charged game of darts ever played.

“Kind of.” Jinx replied. “We were both dealers for my Dad, and the only two teens on that level. We didn’t really have a choice but to be friends. I played bass with her but stopped a few months before Dad passed. We just fell out of contact when I moved in with Vi. She’s nice though, and passionate. Her and Seraphine would be a good match, actually. I don’t know if she wants more than a one night stand, but Scratch is probably the only person who talks as much about audio engineering as Sera does.”

“Huh.” Lux said. “I guess I’ll root for them then. If she’s nice, it would be good for Sera to have a partner who shares an interest.”

Just then, a brutal shiver went through Jinx’s body, and she tensed up at the bar. Lux caught it immediately, and got a glass of water from the barkeep. It took a good 5 seconds for the shakes to subside, sweat pooling on her forehead.

“It’s getting worse.” Lux whispered, concern evident in her expression. The universe only proved her right as an even more sudden wave of nausea struck her, and Jinx sprinted to the bathroom. No matter how much she dry heaved into the toilet with Lux rubbing her back nothing came up, and eventually she collapsed against the stall door. God she would’ve done anything to feel the rush of shimmer pulsing through her, the way her heartbeat felt so slow and so strong and so good. Another shake ravaged her, and Lux gasped as she held Jinx close.

When it subsided, Jinx felt like death, and she whispered out.

“I don’t know if I can do this Blondie. I don’t know if I’m strong enough.”

Lux squeezed tighter.

“I’m sorry. I’m sorry you have to go through this for me.”

Jinx smiled weakly, pulling Lux into her own hug.

“It’s not your fault. I shouldn’t have decided to go cold turkey really. Tapering would have been better, but after everything I’m too scared it’ll just get me hooked again.”

 Lux was quiet for a while, holding Jinx tight as he mind seemed to work, fast and quickly.

“Tapering… like, taking smaller and smaller doses until you're not dependent?”

“That’s right.” Jinx said. Lux was silent again for just as long.

“What… What if I helped you taper off? You promise never to use shimmer when I'm not the one giving it to you, and I make you schedule to reduce your intake until you can effectively drop it. Is that chemically feasible? You're the scientist, not me.”

It was, but it was by no means as easy as that sounded.

“Sure Blondie but, that’s counting a lot on my self control. Are you sure that’s a good idea?”

“No, not your self control.” Lux said, suddenly. “Remember last night? I told you to give yourself to me, to let me have control so I could take care of you. To prove we trusted each other. Now… just do it again.”

What?

“You’re not seriously suggesting we use bdsm to taper me off shimmer, are you?”

Lux clearly realized how silly it sounded too, but she kept her expression resolute.

“Why not? It clearly works to get you to listen to me. We just find a way to channel that obedience into shimmer use. I’ll… I’ll dominate you when you get high on my schedule. That way you know you aren’t allowed unless I’m in control. It could work, I’ve read about people using bdsm for therapy before. How is this any different?”

When Jinx didn’t reply, Lux continued.

“I’ll admit, I wasn’t ready to see you like this Jinx. So weak and fragile, it’s like how you were when I found you in your room. If I can do something to make it better, if I can make this easier for you I want to. I trust you, and I trust myself. We could really do this.”

Jinx was skeptical. She trusted Lux, but she didn’t trust herself. If she injected again she’d fall right back in and she’d lose everything. But, her mind lingered on the promises they’d made to each other. During the gala, and the previous night. Lux the caretaker, maybe this was just another part of the puzzle. Maybe she had to play her part as the patient to find the next part of the machine.

“Okay.”

--

Jinx and Scratch were standing outside the bar alone now, Scratch’s mask off and a pair of cigarettes between them.

“So do you have one?” Jinx asked. Scratch eyed her up for a long time, twirling her cigarette between her fingers.

“I mean, I do.” She said, “But I can’t just give it up y’know? Even if it’s not as advanced as my mask, this shit’s expensive, Jinx. You want it, you gotta pay, or do me a favor.”

A favor, huh?

“I’d rather not pay, so what do you want?”

Scratch took a long drag before putting her mask back on, refusing to make eye contact with Jinx.

“Put in a good word with Seraphine for me.”

…

“Huh?”

Scratch’s eyes flared and her cheeks grew red.

“What? I don’t stutter like you do. You heard me fine.”

“I mean, yeah I’m just confused. You seemed like you were doing just fine, within 10 minutes she had you groping her up and down and was hanging on your every word. Now you’re willing to trade a shimmer mask just for me to wingman?”

Scratch’s anger faded, and she sighed as her shoulders dropped a bit.

“She made it kind of evident she just sees me as a potential fling. Don’t get me wrong she’s easy on the eyes but… she’s smart, funny, and cute. Help a girl out, I know I seem like a playboy but I’m a romantic at heart.”

Huh. Jinx was seeing new sides to all kinds of people this week.

“Yeah, sure man. I don’t know if Seraphine is the type to want something long term, but her and my girlfriend are close. Lux and I will talk you up.”

“Thanks. It's just been a while for me, and no one’s ever made my heart pound the way she did tonight.”

Jinx smiled, giving Scratch a shove.

“You’re still a big softy, Lethal Encore .”

“Shut up!”

Chapter Text

Lux

--

“Alright, I think everyone else is asleep, I haven’t heard anything for a while now. Is the mask ready?”

Jinx answered with a grunt, where she sat at the master bedroom vanity, working with a screwdriver for the mask she’d bartered from Scratch. It was similar to the one she was wearing when they met her, but clearly less advanced. According to Jinx,Scratch’s mask had a built-in amplifier tuned very slightly so that her voice was audible in loud spaces without damaging her already damaged vocal cords while also doubling as her method for using shimmer. Most users who inhaled did it with these masks, Scratch’s was just a unique exception.

Jinx wanted to modify it, something about inhalation always hurting her nose and changing the output settings to release less at a slower interval. Lux was correct in her previous assumption, after the two made a search of Jinx’s truck upon returning home from town, they had managed to find a vial of shimmer buried in the glove box, which apparently Jinx couldn’t even remember when she’d bought. Lux believed her, addict or not Jinx wasn’t the kind of person who lied about things like that.

Or maybe Lux just wanted to believe it.

Regardless they sat together now, Lux with a planner out on the bed and setting dates while Jinx did the math on what dosage to taper down to each time. Currently, Jinx would inhale once a week and reduce the amount each time slightly, until she’d only be taking a fraction of what she used to and could drop without her dependency putting her through as intense of symptoms. It wouldn’t be easy, and hinged both on Jinx not ever using off their set schedule and Lux holding her to that pledge. It could work, it would work.

“Annnd done.” Jinx said as she put her screwdriver down. “Now it won’t keep making me sneeze and irritating my nose. That’s the real danger with inhalation. Breathe through your mouth it gets your throat, breathe through your nose and it gets your nasal tract. Too much and you get serious damage, not to mention your lungs.”

Lux fiddled with the edge of her planner hearing that. She honestly would have preferred Jinx keep injecting so as not to add a new risk, but it had quickly become clear that putting needles near Jinx wasn’t an option right now. Lux had even had to give Jinx her estrogen injection, her hands were too shaky and she could barely look at the needle.

“Do you have the week after the semester ends?” Lux asked.

“Uhhh, yeah we’ll go down to… .1 milliliters. That’ll be less than I’ve ever taken since my surgery. At that point we really can’t drop down much further reasonably, even that much will barely do anything for me so… that’ll be the drop point. The Friday evening after we let out for winter break.”

Lux marked it down, and took a last read over their plans.

“Two months.” She said, “Two more months, and you’ll be done with it.”

The expression on Jinx’s face wasn’t easy to read, but she let out a long breath.

“Two months. Hard to imagine that years of addiction can just stop in such a short amount of time.”

Lux smiled a bit sadly, she wished more than ever that she could have been there when Jinx was in that hell, that somehow she could have taken Jinx in, given her a safe place, used her parents' money to protect her. That was such wishful thinking though, she could do it now and she would do it now. With a hop she got up from the bed, and went to pull Jinx into an embrace. Jinx didn’t resist, immediately letting her head drop to Lux’s shoulder, despite their difference in height. With slow movements Lux rubbed gentle circles into Jinx’s back.

“It won’t end there, you can’t forget.” Lux said, trying to keep her tone gentle and not cruel. Jinx always reacted better to gentleness. “I read a bit about this, but I’m sure you understand better than I can. It’ll always be there, no matter how long it’ll be. But I’ll be there too, so just lean on me.”

Jinx nodded, her breath shaking, likely with nerves and with the way her body trembled from withdrawal.

“Let’s get it over with.” Jinx said, stepping away and picking the mask up. The nice clothing she’d worn for their clubbing was gone now, leaving her in a black pair of boxers and an old ratty tank top she used as a sleep shirt. Lux was in a similar state, wearing only a pair of panties and one of Jinx’s t-shirts.

“Okay.” She whispered, taking Jinx by the arm and gently leading her to the bed. Already that simple motion had shifted the energy, Lux was leading her girl to her bed, where she would take care of her. Jinx didn’t fight at all.

Lux couldn’t deny her own nerves and the feeling of her heartbeat pounding in her chest as they crawled into the bed. Despite their constant intimate touch these last two months, there was an electric feeling to this. It was different, and new, and altogether unique. An extension of what they’d done in the dead of night, all trust. She felt a bit silly, like the teenager she used to be, sitting with a close friend on her bed during a sleepover, trying to find a way to justify ‘practicing kissing for boys.’ 

Jinx was very different from that girl, but the feelings she elicited were much the same. Almost in mirror to what she wanted then, Lux cupped Jinx’s cheek with one hand and brought their lips together. Not for a long kiss, but enough to let the tension fade a bit from between them. Jinx was always so nice to kiss, her lips were sharp but soft, and she always made the cutest noises of satisfaction, and then of protest when you pulled away.

“Here, let’s sit like this.” Lux whispered, maneuvering to half lie back and half sit on the pillows at the head of the bed. Then she pulled Jinx down to lie on her, facing upwards and so that her head was resting on Lux’s chest. She was shivering fiercely, and sweat was an ever constant on her forehead, or her arms.

Jinx went to put the mask on herself, but Lux moved a hand to stop her. She looked up with a question in her eyes, so Lux spoke.

“Let me do it.” She let the tone that she used when she’d be the one in charge during sex slip through, and she watched the way Jinx suddenly went ramrod straight. It would be a lie to say she didn’t feel any pride in how she could make Jinx squirm. With gentle movements she took the gas mask-like device from Jinx’s hands, and placed it firmly around Jinx’s mouth and nose. Jinx’s eyes were wide, and her heartbeat was going fast, but she did nothing to stop Lux. It took a few tries to wrap the straps safely and snug around the back, but with a press of a button they sealed the mask. Now Jinx’s breath had an audible hiss, and a little puff of steam that left the mask.

According to Jinx, shimmer masks were so popular because when the vaporous shimmer was exhaled, they would filter most of the gas, so that only your breath left. You just had to clean the filters after every use, or else it could suffocate you in shimmer. Just another thing to be diligent over, and Lux was nothing if not diligent.

Jinx was holding the vial in one hand, moving it between her fingers with an obvious uncertainty. Despite her previous agreement, Lux needed to check again.

“Light?” She asked.

Jinx closed her eyes and steadied herself.

“Green.”

There was no time like the present. Lux plucked the vial, already lowered slightly from Jinx’s previous dose, and opened the loading chamber on the mask. It slid in with no issues, though Jinx watched it suspiciously. She was scared, obviously, but there was clearly an air of excitement. No doubt every inch of her was screaming for the shimmer, but she was holding it back. That made her proud of Jinx.

“You’re doing good.” She whispered, and Jinx whimpered pathetically. “You’re being very patient for me, Jinx. Do you think you should get a reward?”

Jinx stilled for a moment, but then nodded.

“Okay, here we go.”

Then clicked the button that would prime the mask. In seconds it whirred as the shimmer in the vial was emptied and vaporized, and then in a few seconds, it began to hiss like a gas pipe. Jinx’s hand found Lux’s, closed it tightly, and then she inhaled deeply through her nose.

A few moments later she was sputtering and coughing, her eyes watery as she shot up.

“Shit, are you okay?” Lux said, reaching for the straps. Jinx only wheezed in and coughed up gas again, the mask expelling long strands of odorless steam with every hack. When Lux’s fingers began to tug, Jinx put a hand up and stopped her.

“N-No…” Another wheeze, Jinx’s voice was heavy and dry. “No, if you take it off the gas’ll go everywhere, you’ll get a whiff and the room will smell like shit. I’m fi-'' Another cough. “Fine.”

Lux wanted very badly to protest, to pull the mask off and turn a fan on with the windows open. It was hurting Jinx, and it was Lux’s job to take care of Jinx. But, reason argued with emotion, because if their plan was going to work Jinx had to get the shimmer somehow, and the smell would be incredibly strong, it wouldn’t be hard for the others to smell it.

And Lux knew Ekko would not be happy to find out she was helping Jinx use shimmer, even if it was to help her get off of it eventually. Instead of pulling the mask off she placed a hand onto Jinx’s back and began to rub. Jinx’s breath was labored and heavy, but the coughing and wheezing eventually stopped, and soon Jinx’s breath evened out completely.

“Better?” Lux whispered, trying to ease them back into a better tone. This was supposed to be BDSM after all, she needed to have the authority to teach Jinx that this was only something she could do when Lux was the one in charge. Jinx nodded, allowing herself to be pulled back into Lux’s lap, steady and slow  as she worked her way through the vial. It took much longer than Lux imagined shooting up took, which was probably why Jinx preferred it over this or other methods.

As she went Lux ran her fingers through Jinx’s hair, scratching gently against her scalp and soothing where she could, whispering sweet nothings about how good Jinx was doing, how she was being so brave to let Lux do this, how she belonged to Lux, and this was a pleasure Lux was giving her. 10 minutes passed before the signs began hitting Jinx. Even though it wasn’t direct injection, her veins turned that awful pink shade all the way to her eyes, and the whites of her eyes gained a hint of the same. Her movements become uncoordinated and awkward, but all the tension in her body fully left her. Lux had to bite her lip and push the image of Jinx’s nearly dead body from her mind when Jinx went so limp. Just two months and this would be gone from their lives.

Jinx reached weakly to undo the mask, but Lux stopped her. She ejected the vial, and once satisfied that all the shimmer was gone and wouldn’t leek, she removed the mask from Jinx. Her expression was as expected, fully blissed and empty, like she was there but not really there. Lux schooled herself to smile, moving a strand of blue hair out of Jinx’s face.

“Hey.” She whispered. Jinx smiled.

“Mmm… Blondie.”

Lux couldn’t help but giggle.

“How do you feel?”

Jinx thought it over, then shrugged.

“Kinda horny.”

“Is that so?” She said, opening the inside of the mask to remove the filters. They were covered in a pink muck, congealed and thick. She winced before sliding Jinx off of her. “Well I’ll take care of you once I’ve cleaned this off. Be good for me and sit still, okay?”

Jinx hummed and nodded, shifting in place and laying patiently. When Lux got to the bathroom, she allowed herself to collapse just a bit. She hated seeing this husk of her girlfriend, watching as all the life and warmth she held faded and was left instead with dying ash. But it was this or watch Jinx fall apart from withdrawal, a shivering sickly mess. This would only last for a few hours, then her Jinx would come back to her. 

Still, she let herself cry into the sink while she cleaned out the filters, quiet so that Jinx wouldn’t hear. If Jinx saw how much it hurt Lux, she’d never let it happen again, and this was what had to be done. When she finally had control of her emotions again, she went back out to Jinx and made the husk feel alive.

--

Just over two hours later, Jinx was back. Still with the hue in her eyes and her veins faint, but her mental function had fully returned.

“That was… interesting.” Jinx said as they cuddled in the dark. Lux looked up at her from her chest.

“Yeah?”

“Yeah. I’ve had sex high plenty of times but not like that.”

“Was it good?”

Jinx didn’t reply right away, and Lux was worried then that she’d made a huge mistake. Thankfully her fears were dispelled before they could get worse.

“I guess. I almost think the petting and cuddling and holding was better. It felt… safe. Like I was putting myself in danger, but you were holding me, so I knew it would be okay. When you touched me it all felt so muted. Like, yeah I came, don’t get me wrong you’re amazing, but it wasn’t the same as when we do it normally. I could tell you didn’t want to push me while I was high. So… maybe we save the sex till after my high goes away, and you can just spend the high doing the other stuff?”

Lux smiled, a weight leaving her shoulder, because frankly she hadn’t liked pleasing Jinx while she was like that.

“That sounds great, I’m much more comfortable doing it like that. Maybe if you want we could do some kink stuff that isn’t directly sex?”

“Yeah… I’ll think about what would feel good.” Jinx said. “I’m sorry that you had to do it.”

“Don’t be. It’s an experiment, the first time doesn’t go perfectly right? We’ll adjust and do better next time. Um… how do you feel after the high at least?”

“Much better.” Jinx sighed a dopey smile on her face. “It’s hard to explain but once the shimmer hits the world changes. Everything slows down, I can’t think about complicated things. Like I’m on a cloud, I can barely comprehend what’s going on. All the bad things just go away and I’m left floating. So warm and tingly and happy.”

Lux didn’t like the way she was describing it, it was a risk letting Jinx use shimmer. There was a very real chance they would go back to PIltover and Jinx would relapse as soon as she had the chance, shooting up and ruining all the work that they’d both been putting in. She did trust Jinx, but she knew that addiction turned people against their own best interests. The pit of addiction can be like needing to breathe, an addict would do anything or hurt anyone for their next hit. But then she’d look at that big warm smile on Jinx’s face, and she had no choice but to believe in her.

If Jinx noticed her hesitation, she didn’t say so, instead suddenly swinging herself up to straddle Lux.

“Don’t worry, I won’t do it without you, and next time we’ll do better. For now, I believe there’s some payback due.”

Lux’s heart skipped a beat, and she couldn’t help but bite her lip as she pushed the covers out of Jinx’s way. When she finally fell asleep, legs shivering and exhausted to the core, she made a mental note that she had to pay Jinx back 5 times over for that night.

--

The bet was settled Sunday in the morning while her, Jinx, and Seraphine were putting a puzzle together on the coffee table, which would end up like a painting of Tereshni from off the coast. Scratch had invited herself, apparently, though she wasn’t putting any effort into the puzzle. Jinx and Seraphine had gone to go watch Scratch play Saturday evening, and by the pictures Jinx showed her it was a riot. As fun as it seemed she was glad she didn’t go, Lethal Encore’s music gave her a headache, and she suspected hearing them live would have given her permanent ear damage.

Her and Jinx had done as Scratch asked and told Seraphine that they thought the two would be good together, but Lux wasn’t sure what had come of it. Seraphine just seemed confused really, but gossiped with them anyway. At the least their fling was still on, since the two of them kept giving each other bedroom eyes.

They had only managed to put one corner of the puzzle in any decent shape when Lux ran out of water. A quick glance showed that Jinx was out of drink too.

“Need anything?” She asked as she stood.

“If you’re offering, a beer please.”

Lux nodded and crawled over Seraphine to escape the couch, then walked through the kitchen and opened the door to the garage. That’s when she saw them. A flash of blonde, a flash of white.

Opposite to her, Ezreal’s back was against the wall of the garage, and Ekko’s hands bordered either side of his head. Ezreal’s legs were spread with Ekko slotted between them, Ezreal's hands splayed below against the back wall. She heard a muffled groan from Ezreal and a chuckle from Ekko, who moved one hand to thread through Ezreal’s blonde hair.

Lux quietly closed the door before seeing anything further. When she came back with water for herself and a glass of orange juice for Jinx, she answered Jinx’s questioning glance by pulling a 10 dollar bill from her wallet and giving it to her. Jinx’s eyes went wide, and she immediately grabbed her phone.

//Jinx: WHAT HAPPENED???//

Part of her felt wrong for revealing this, but it wasn’t like the two of them were entirely subtle.

//Lux: Ekko has Ez pinned to the wall. They’re sucking face as we speak.//

//Jinx: Hot damn, that was even faster than I thought. Look at us, three couples now.//

//Lux: Might be a bit early to call either of them a couple. I’m still not sure if Seraphine even wants something long term, and Ez and Ekko could just be having a one time fling. I mean this is the first guy Ez has been with, he might just be exploring.//

//Jinx: Ah, yeah, and you’re exploring with me was so non-commital.//

Lux’s cheeks burned a bit.

//Lux: Okay, fair point.//

--

One of their last planned events was to hit up a local arcade that same night. Apparently it was the passion project of the guy who owned it, and according to Jinx ‘local arcades always have the good shit compared to chain businesses.’

Everyone else was ecstatic, Jinx Ekko and Ezreal all played this genre called ‘fighting games’ which were somewhat niche. But those games held their origins in arcades, so a smaller place was the best place to find the local scene. Seraphine had a taste for rhythm games, which Lux did understand, and Scratch (who was their 6th member now? Lux wasn’t sure when her band would be leaving Tereshni) seemed more than content to follow Seraphine around. Her and Seraphine were kind of cute together, Lux had to admit, and Lux owed her one for getting Jinx the shimmer mask.

That left Lux as the only one who had basically no clue what to expect. She knew what video games were, she knew Jinx liked them very much, but she’d never played anything besides time wasters on her phone like bejeweled. She wasn’t going to complain about this stop, but she also wasn’t sure it would be for her. While they were getting ready, Jinx must have noticed that Lux wasn’t so excited.

“You okay?” She said, pulling them away from the group for a moment.

“Yeah, I’m fine.” Though Lux didn’t even think it sounded convincing. “It’s just, when we planned our arcade date the day everything happened, I knew it would just be us. So, even though I don’t know anything about video games, I figured you’d show me everything. But now you and Ezreal and Ekko all have this game you like, and Seraphine has her game she likes, so I’m worried I may just stand around for a few hours while you guys have fun.”

Jinx hummed, reaching to take Lux’s hand in hers and giving it a quick squeeze. She couldn’t help but relax at feeling those calloused fingers against her own.

“Well, I promise that’s not going to happen. I’m gonna play with Ekko and Ezreal but just for a bit, the rest of the time I’ll show you everything that arcades have to offer. Including fighting games. Who knows? Maybe you’ll like them.”

Lux wasn’t convinced, she strongly doubted video games would appeal to her at all. Those were always Garen’s thing, another nerdy interest that even if she had a shred of interest, wasn’t welcoming to young girls. Or any girls, at least in Demacia. 

But she wasn’t in Demacia, and Jinx wanted to share something she loved with Lux. She could suck it up for one night to see her little firecracker light up.

“Okay, just don’t be surprised if I don’t leap into it.”

When they arrived, the first thing that hit her were the sounds. From speakers inside came a pumping beat, playing the title song to some anime Lux vaguely remembered. The lights were dim and colored shades of blue and purple, lighting up tape all over the walls to make pictures, homemade light-up-in-the-dark murals of characters Lux didn’t recognize and one or two that she did from the shows Jinx had watched with her.

The arcade was divided between two large spaces with a wall between them, one side with a bar and small kitchen and an enormous line of pinball machines, and the other with walls of cabinets and machines Lux couldn’t really name. In the center of that room were two huge looking setups with dance pads, that Lux at least recognized as Dance Dance Revolution, or some variation of it.

A set of stairs bordered the opposite sides of the building and seemed to lead up to a balcony floor that sat above the back sides of both rooms, connecting again in the middle. It was loud, the music augmented by all kinds of sounds coming from the different cabinets and the raised conversations of its clients. 

It was a little overwhelming, but it wasn’t worse than the house show.

Lux paid for all of their passes, which let them play for the entire night, and got them all a drink to begin. The girl behind the bar was gorgeous, apparently cosplaying a video game character Lux yet again didn’t know. When she got them all their drinks she gave Lux a wink before wishing them a good night. Lux wasn’t sure if the red on her face was visible in the lighting.

“Alright you guys have fun!” Seraphine said, yanking Scratch away immediately “I’ve got a date and her name is Chunithm!” Which was the rhythm game she liked.

They waved the two of them off, and Ezreal addressed the group of 4.

“Where do you guys want to start?” 

“I think the fighting game stuff is upstairs.” Ekko said. “Do we want to browse around first?”

“That works for me.” Jinx said, suddenly reaching around Lux and firmly taking her by the hip. So she had noticed the wink the bartender gave her. Lux couldn’t help the butterflies that swarmed in her stomach from that.

“So there’s a bit of everything down here it seems like.” Jinx said as they split up further into pairs. “Tell me if you see anything interesting. Otherwise, we’ll have a sample of each genre.”

The problem with telling Jinx if she saw something interesting was that Lux had to understand what any of the screens were showing to rate them interesting or not. It became clear almost immediately that this was the case, so Jinx took action.

“Okay, samples it is.”

--

About an hour into the arcade, Lux had to admit she was starting to have fun. Her and Jinx had tried so many different things by now, pinball, DDR, Project Sekai, Initial D, and a bunch of other random games of varying quality. She was a bit relieved to see that for most of these arcade games, Jinx wasn’t some kind of master either. They’d either take turns, or compete, or play together as they explored the space. It was so nice to be together like this, just being a normal couple doing normal things without anyone to fear or judge them. Lux changed her mind, this with the beach and all the other things? Vacations were amazing.

Just as they were getting to a new section, Ezreal came running up to them.

“Jinx!” He said, far faster than necessary. “We have to play Time Crisis together. Ekko said you have the high score at your local arcade.”

Jinx raised an eyebrow.

“That’s right.”

“I have the high score at a place in Marrowmark. Well, I did the last time I visited. I gotta see if you’re as good as he says.”

Jinx turned to Lux, who just shrugged.

“Ok. You’re on.”

Time Crisis, Lux soon found out, was something called a rail shooter. It was a larger machine than most of the ones around, featuring two big screens side by side and two model guns plugged into the setup. The players would shoot at things on the screen with the guns as it moved around, and lasers would track where the shots went.

Both of them seemed in their element as they stepped up to take the pistols, and it brought an eerie memory back to Lux which she’d firmly repressed. Jinx owned a handgun, kept it under her bed, and had gotten it out in the midst of a breakdown before her overdose. Seeing her holding it wasn’t her favorite thing.

And worse, it seemed to suit Jinx’s hand. It looked like it belonged there, like Jinx was made to hold a weapon, in her ripped up jeans and her tank top that showed off her tattoos and her track marks if she wasn’t careful. She was the picture of drug violence, and it made Lux so sad. And more shamefully, it excited her. It excited her to remember just how dangerous Jinx was, even if it was just a toy in her hand right now.

Just as it seemed to suit her hand, the game suited Jinx as well. She was a natural, she shot without hesitation whenever an enemy would run out onto the screen, she effortlessly aimed between the soldiers shooting at her and the bystanders running passed. Ezreal was good too, but Jinx moved faster than Lux even knew she could. And the look in her eyes, wide and unblinking and thrilled as she bit her lip when the difficulty began to ramp up. Like she was an engine, she just got faster and faster and faster. And what brought it all together, she started laughing in the last stage. Cackling with adrenaline.

By the end, Ezreal knew he was beat, and Jinx etched in JNX to the initials as she placed just under the machine's high score.

“I’m a little out of practice.” She said, a crazed look in her eye that seemed to unsettle everyone around them. If Jinx noticed, she paid them no mind, instead pulling Lux away from the crowd. “I need a smoke.” Was the only explanation she gave.

When Jinx began taking them away from the building, Lux tried to protest.

“Jinx wher- mhm?!”

She was cut off as she was suddenly pressed into the outside wall of the building complex, and Jinx pulled her into a vicious kiss. A spike of surprise went through her, and for a moment Lux let everything else fall out and let the arousal in what she had seen take over. It was scary but it was so exhilarating, and truthfully.

The little sigh she gave seemed to be all Jinx needed to deepen it further, and she felt a leg suddenly slotting between her own. She was so close to grinding against it when she remembered where exactly they were. With a shove that perhaps used a bit too much force, she pushed Jinx off of her.

“S-Stop.” She said, trying to catch her breath. Jinx looked mortified, stepping away as soon as whatever haze had hit them dispersed.

“Shit. Sorry.” Jinx said through heavy breaths. “Fuck. I-I-I don’t know what came over me.”

Lux couldn’t find the words to reply, instead just took her own deep steadying breaths. Rather than stutter any further Jinx leaned her back against the wall next to Lux. Beside her she felt Jinx’s fingers brush against her own, and on account of the sudden kiss she flinched. Jinx took that horribly, and Lux could see the way she started to turn in on herself.

Rather than let that happen, Lux forced herself to speak.

“It’s fine.” She said, and it was mostly true. “I’m not mad at you.” That was true. Jinx didn’t seem convinced, but honestly Lux wasn’t really in the mood to fight with whatever demons were in her girlfriend’s head right now. She was going to shoot straight for once, not dance around anything, and if Jinx took it badly they could figure it out later.

“What happened?”

Jinx slouched beside her, flexing her hands at her side as a frown set on her face. She was being overwhelmed, or had been overwhelmed, it seemed.

“I don’t know.” Jinx answered. “I just got so excited, I was doing so well there. I felt so cool with you watching me smoke Ezreal, and the adrenaline from the game filled me up. And I just suddenly had all this energy in me and I couldn’t let it out, so I dragged you out here so I can keep it going. I’m sorry I didn’t- I didn’t mean to-”

“Jinx, I said it’s fine.” Lux said it with an authority that seemed to capture Jinx’s attention. “I meant what I said. I’m not mad at you. I just wasn’t expecting that.”

Jinx kept her eyes set on Lux for a while, looking around awkwardly and then nodding.

“Yeah. You know me. Just, felt a bit high on everything. If i’d been feeling the withdrawal I would’ve sucked ass at that, but I didn’t, and it all just exploded. Can I get you anything? Like water or something?”

Lux took one more deep breath in and out to expel whatever the kiss had imbued her with. She hated herself for admitting it, but seeing Jinx like that always affected her. The fear and concern mixed with arousal and excitement in ways that felt so wrong. She’d have to talk to Jinx about it later, when they weren’t leaning on the wall of a pet store next to the arcade and looking at a half empty parking lot. 

She reached out and took Jinx’s hand, who latched on to her grip immediately. “I’m okay.” She whispered with a smile to Jinx. Jinx who was still clearly so worried and so tense and feeling so guilty. Lux did her best to alleviate the feeling by leaning up and giving her a quick kiss on the cheek. That did get Jinx to smile, and together they walked back into the arcade.

--

Fighting games, Lux realized, were a little hard to follow. Jinx Ezreal and Ekko had filed quickly around a game called High Noon Gothic, which seemed like it was based on the anime of the same name Jinx had shown her. Or, maybe the anime was based on the game? The premise was that the characters were forging into an untamed land at the peak of an industrial revolution, but there were magical and esoteric powers at work too. It all had a wild west cowboy flare behind it, and many of the characters were demons or angels, or had other magic powers.

“The key of the game really is execution.” Jinx said with an arm around Lux while Ekko and Ezreal were playing. “It’s high intensity and skill based, one slip up and you could get caught in a combo and lose the round. At the same time if you take advantage of a player's mistake, you’ve got to follow through with the combo. But, really for people at our skill level it’s way less complicated than that. The appeal of these games is that you have a coolass character you love, and you press buttons and cool shit happens.”

Lux was still less than convinced, watching the characters on screen beat each other up. The one Ezreal was playing was one of the characters from the show, this buff southern bell with an umbrella which she swung around like a sword and a heavy looking shield, and the one Ekko was playing was this big lion Vastaya with a cowl and a buoy knife.

They dashed back and forth, swinging or shooting out projectiles which Lux couldn’t truly catch the complexities behind. She was certain that this wasn’t for her, when suddenly Ekko did something.

The lion leaped forward, grabbed Ezreal’s character, jumped up and then dropped her across his knee. Her eyes lit up, and she spoke far too loudly without realizing it.

“That’s Braum’s back breaker!”

Everyone looked at her at once with confusion in their eyes, most of all Jinx. Oh gods, she’d just blurted that out, even a few other patrons were looking over now.

“What?” Jinx said.

Fuck. Ugh she was so stupid.

“That move.” She said, far quieter than before. “That was Braum’s back breaker. You know, Braum, the professional wrestler? That’s one of his signature moves. He grabs you, jumps up and then drops you on his knee or across his shoulders.”

Ezreal blinked twice. “You know about professional wrestling?” 

Lux nodded, incredibly slowly as shyness and embarrassment ran rampant through her cheeks.

“How?” Jinx again.

“I watch it.”

“You what!?”

This was one of the things Lux had resolved not to share about herself, even with Jinx. It was embarrassing as all hell and completely antithetical to the image she tried to project. Not the one her parents had built, but the one she was building. The one with a passion for art and photography and a love for nature and fun and a deep enjoyment of sports and friendly competition. Maybe it was basic, but it was how she liked to be viewed, a normal college girl who liked normal things a college girl would like.

Pro Wrestling was the outlier. She couldn’t really explain when exactly it had happened, or why it was different from the other things Garen liked that she turned her nose towards. At some point he’d begun watching it, and Lux, in elementary school at the time, started watching too. And she never really dropped it, she’d fallen too much in love with what it was. It was fake, obviously, but it wasn’t about whether it was real or not. It was about the story, the rivalries, the performance, it was just so fun and cool.

Braum wasn’t her favorite wrestler, that went firmly to Galio the Gargoyle, but he was still very high up there on her list. It was an iconic move, he’d fully invented it years before in the match that put his name on the map against Draven the Executioner. The same match he’d also smashed a plywood door against Draven, which became one of his other signatures but that was neither here nor there. To see it so obviously recreated in the game had made her a little too excited.

“It’s just something my brother liked, so I picked up too. Like, osmosis, you know?” It was a flimsy excuse, hiding how much she knew about it.

“Hey, there’s nothing wrong with liking pro wrestling.” Ekko said as he stepped away from the machine since his and Ezreal's round had ended. “I see the appeal. Your sister likes it, right Jinx?”

“Uh… maybe?” Jinx replied. “I can’t remember if she watches actual mma fighting or that. Why haven’t you ever told me?”

Lux shrugged, she refused to bare her heart with Ezreal and Ekko there. Far too awkward.

“Just never saw a reason to bring it up.”

The other two accepted this and moved on from it, but from the look on Jinx’s face she was going to be interrogated about this later in private. That was fair.

“You wanna give it a try?” Ezreal said, cutting through the tension and gesturing to the game. “You and Jinx should play together.

Jinx gave her a questioning look. She’d already decided to keep an open mind here, so she stepped up.

“Sure.”

After a few hours of learning how to make the Lion Vastaya pull off various pro wrestling moves she recognized, Lux came to a revelation. Fighting games were awesome.

--

Lux revealed the final surprise after they got home. They’d be heading home tomorrow and going back to classes on time, to Jinx’s annoyance. Jinx got in the shower first, the arcade got a bit hot and sweaty later as the night went on with those blaring purple lights and all those people moving around and having fun. After Lux’s turn she dried off and subtly pulled the box out from where she’d hidden it under the sink.

She and Seraphine had actually picked out her bikinis from the surf shop very quickly, but Seraphine noticed another shop right next door and dragged Lux into it right away. So as she stepped out of the bathroom where Jinx was lying with her phone out, she cleared her throat with a heavy mix of embarrassment of pride. Jinx looked up and then her eyes went wide.

It was an adult store that Seraphine had noticed. At first she’d protested, and it was so embarrassing to look around inside. The staff had clearly noticed Lux was a bit new to that sort of thing, so they had been very nice and unobtrusive as she and Seraphine looked around. Seraphine had gotten lingerie which basically amounted to something a stripper would wear and a pair of very heels to match. 

“Uhm…” Lux started, suddenly far more shy than she had planned to be. “Seraphine said you’d like this… so…” It wasn’t like this was the first time Jinx had seen her wear something flattering, but this was the first time she’d bought something for the sole purpose of turning her partner on. Honestly that wasn’t even accurate either, because it was turning herself on maybe even more than it was Jinx.

She was wearing a playboy bunny outfit, a tight single piece with a pair of fishnet leggings to match, two little white cuffs around her wrists, and a headband with bunny ears. She’d put her hair up in a ponytail as well to work nicely with the headband and though it wasn’t visible, there was a bunny tail right above her butt. Her own small pair of black heels clicked with each little nervous step she took, unable to look at Jinx and with her hands clasped in front of her.

Turmoil churned in her stomach as she felt both incredibly sexy and so ridiculous. The more she tried to find the words the more her mind blanked, and she felt her face grow hot with embarrassment and shame. The worst of it was, the shame only turned her on that much more. A side effect of growing up with the Illuminators, according to Jinx.

She heard Jinx shift on the bed, and she only looked up from her hiding when Jinx was getting up and walking towards her. Her eyes were narrowed just a bit but Lux could see the excitement behind her eyes. The embers of what happened between them earlier were still burning in each of them, and clearly this had made them blaze.

“She was right.” Jinx said, stepping close and roughly grabbing Lux by the hips, which made her elicit a surprised little ‘eep!’ “She was very much right.” Jinx’s voice was practically a growling roll as she pulled Lux close. Lux shivered, satisfaction filling her now that she knew Jinx liked it. Gods she was so in love with this awful woman.

Slowly Jinx backed them up until their legs touched the bed, then she quickly sat down and spread them out.

“You know what these outfits are for, right?”

Lux swallowed hard and nodded.

“They’re for the girls in places like casinos and strip clubs, right?”

“That’s right. And you know what that means beyond that?”

Lux shook her head, enjoying the submissive to dominant demeanor they were both quickly adopting from Lux’s initial shyness.

“It means service.”

Lux understood. Jinx wanted a reversal of the same thing they’d done at the beginning of this week.

“Yes sir.” Lux whispered the way Jinx liked it, and dropped to her knees. 

--

After everything they cuddled up under the blankets, long after they’d finish and yet both unable to sleep. Her head was resting on Jinx’s chest, listening fondly to her heartbeat and ignoring the way Jinx’s piercing poked her cheek. She still had that metallic taste in her mouth, which she was getting more and more used to awkwardly.

It had been such a relaxing week, and if this was the future of what her and Jinx’s life might look like? She’d be very happy with that. Maybe she was thinking ahead of herself though, they’d only been together for 2 months. Actually 2 and half now. Officially dating for even less, though somehow it felt like all the time she’d spent with Jinx they’d been dating. Neither of them would admit it at the time but there was such a strong attraction from the start. The only way it could come out was animosity though, up until the dam broke at the concert. Even still, she’d never felt quite so close to a person like this.

Her musings were interrupted with a notification from her phone, and she reached over Jinx to grab it. Jinx commented something in the background about Lux’s chest feeling nice pressed against her, but Lux ignored it.

//Marcie: Lux I know you didn’t go home from break, why won’t you answer the door already//

Huh?

//Lux: I’m not on campus. What’s going on?//

There was a long pause that lodged a bit into her stomach as she settled into Jinx again. The three little bubbles felt like they went on forever, letting Lux’s mind race about why on earth Marcie would be knocking at her door.

//Marcie: Where are you?//

It was clear that the message had been rewritten and deleted several times.

//Lux: I’m in Tereshni right now. I took a trip with Jinx, Ezreal, Seraphine, and some other people who don’t go to the Academy. Marcie what’s going on?//

Another pregnant pause.

“What’s up?” Jinx said, looking from her own phone.

“Marcie is just texting me some weird shit. She’s trying to talk to me I guess? She thought I was in my dorm and ignoring her, knocking on my door.”

“Ugh, she’s the worst like that right?”

A text came in before she could inquire about what Jinx meant.

//Marcie: I just needed to talk to you about something in person. We can talk about it when you're home. Also, someone in your family must have your room number wrong, I got a letter from Tianna Crownguard. I assume it’s your mom or something? I didn’t open it before you ask//

Lux wasn’t going to ask, she would have assumed Marcie wouldn’t go through someone else’s mail. Then again it was Marcie. Ugh, she really did not want to have whatever conversation Marcie was going to have with her. Their last talk hadn’t ended so well. The ominous letter from auntie Tianna was also concerning.

//Lux: Alright, just slide it under my door please//

Marcie didn’t reply, so Lux huffed and tossed her phone to the side of the bed again.

“Is she bitching you?” Jinx asked.

“I don’t even know. She said she has something she needs to talk to me about in person. Honestly she’s been so weird to me since you and I became closer.”

Jinx hummed, and spoke as if it wasn’t at all important.

“Yeah that makes sense. She got super weird about me after I stopped hooking up with her.”

Lux blanched and sat up.

“You what?!”

Jinx just kept looking at her phone.

“Yeah, didn’t I ever explain this to you?”

Lux fought the annoyance that crept towards her.

“Not really, I don’t know about most of your relationships, only Carin. And I know about you and Ekko, sort of, everything else is blank.”

Jinx did put her phone down now, her expression hard to read.

“Well you don’t have to get annoyed. And don’t bring Ekko up, that's its own beast. Marcie is pretty much the same as Carin. I met her when I started at the academy, she and her plastic toys needed drugs for their house parties, I sold drugs. It became pretty clear that all of those bitches were into me, I mean I’m irresistible of course, so I figured it could be fun to mess around with some topsider bimbos. Marcie was the only one I slept with long term, and by long term I meant like a month at most. I made it clear from the start I just wanted to have some fun and that I didn’t do relationships. She thought somehow that we were serious and I was her girlfriend. She flipped out on me when she found out I was fucking other people, so I cut it off then and there. Decidedly not my fault, she got false ideas about what we were despite me saying otherwise. So now she’s convinced that I “tricked her” into a relationship just for sex, as if that wasn’t the label on the cereal box she bought.”

That did clear up a few things about Marcie’s hostilities towards her suddenly and her and her friends disdain for Jinx. Hypocritical as hell of them though, judging her for being a slut while having slept with her.

“Oh my god.” Lux said with a start. “I think Marcie’s jealous of me. I’m pretty sure she knows about us, and she started being weird when you and I became friends.”

Jinx’s eyes went wide for a second, and then she started laughing.

“Oh my god, that’s fucking hilarious. Oh she’s the worst Lux. Serves her right, she’s such a bitch. Now you’re telling her she’s pining for me and jealous of you? You just couldn’t get better cosmic justice if you asked Our Lady Janna herself.”

Lux honestly wasn’t sure how exactly to feel about this revelation, but for now she just laughed as well, because it was a little ridiculous. She acted like Jinx was so beneath her, when really she was mad that Lux had what she wanted.

Yeah… Lux did have what Marcie wanted.

Lux perhaps understood a bit why Jinx got off on feeling of ownership.

--

The drive home wasn’t nearly as fun. Not only were they leaving vacation to get back to classes/work, but Seraphine was being mopey that Scratch wasn’t there (and coping by constantly texting her and sending selfies) and there was a new and different kind of tension between Ezreal and Ekko suddenly. Something must have happened between them after that kiss. No one brought it up.

After another 9 hour drive due to customs and stopping for food, they were back home in Piltover and Zaun. One by one they dropped their friends back off at their places, getting a thank you and a flurry of goodbys each time. Seraphine’s, as usual, was met with a very charged kiss to the cheek that felt like it was getting more and more dangerous each time.

They pulled back into Jinx’s house, and Lux noticed something strange. She swore that the black sports car out front was Caitlyn’s. Even the license plate numbers looked similar. Couldn’t be though, it must’ve been Vi’s girlfriend.

After parking they hauled a bit of their cargo echo and trudged their way inside.

“Welcome back.” Came Vi from the couch, standing and rushing to help Jinx with the bags.

“Hey.” Jinx called back, offloading a duffle to Vi, who held it like it weighed nothing.

Then, to Lux’s great surprise, Caitlyn stood up from the couch that Vi had been sitting on. Her and Lux’s eyes met, and they gasped and spoke at the same time.

“Caitlyn?” “Lux?”

Chapter Text

Jinx

--

“You two know each other?” Horror was rife in Jinx’s tone as Lux and Caitlyn looked at each other, eyes wide.

“She’s the captain of my volleyball team, you’re Vi’s girlfriend?”

Caitlyn’s eyes flicked between Lux and Jinx, and her brow furrowed as realization struck.

“You’re the girl Jinx just started dating.” She pinched her nose and shook her head. “Of all the coincidences, we’ve known each other for nearly a month and neither of us knew that our partners were sisters.”

A bit of ice filled Jinx’s veins. Lux talked about her volleyball captain with so much respect and admiration in her voice (and probably a bit of attraction, if they were being honest). If Caitlyn came to her and told her to stop dating Jinx… would she?

“How the hell did no one make this connection?” Vi interrupted, hoisting the bag she’d been given to the side.

“I guess, Cait never said your name, Vi, just always said ‘my girlfriend.’ And Jinx never said Cait’s name either, just said ‘my sister’s girlfriend’ or something else.” (They all knew something else was something offensive but no one acknowledged it.

The conversation blurred a bit against her ears as Jinx’s thoughts began to insulate. If Caitlyn had taken such a shine to Lux, there was no way she wouldn’t scrutinize their relationship. If anyone knew just how much of a fuckup Jinx was, it was most certainly Caitlyn. Gods, would she tell Lux everything? Expose her wounds raw and bloody to scare Lux away? Would that be for the best? It was only a matter of time before Jinx exploded and burned Lux after all, but gods she had been the best thing to happen to Jinx in so long. She couldn’t just let go like that.

“Jinx?”

Sound snapped to normal like a fishing line, and Jinx’s head whipped towards Lux, whose eyes were filled with concern. Everyone was looking at her. A moment passed as she didn’t speak, and it became obvious she wasn’t listening.

“You okay, pow-pow?” Vi asked, taking a slow step towards her. She must’ve looked manic, or upset, or something, because there were suddenly eggshells that her family, old and new, were stepping around. She took a shaky breath in and turned into the kitchen to get a drink, like nothing was wrong.

“I’m fine. I was just thinking about something else. What’s up?” She hoped her tone wasn’t as shaky as her hands.

“I was just saying that, since Cait and I are on the same team the two of you can come watch together for the official matches. And I was telling Cait that I wanted to join the team officially.” Lux said, her voice slow and even.

Jinx took a deep breath, focusing her attention onto the feeling of the refrigerator door, cold textured plastic.

“Yeah, totally.” She said it too fast, trying to sound normal. The rest of them continued talking, but most of it felt muted by cotton against her ears. Eventually her and Lux went to take their things upstairs, but not before Jinx risked a wary glance at Caitlyn. They made eye contact, her brow furrowed ever so slightly. If she had anything she wanted to say, she didn’t. 

When they were alone in Jinx’s room, Jinx finally spoke.

“She’s going to tell you that you shouldn’t be dating me.”

Lux turned from where she had set her backpack down.

“What?”

Jinx didn’t look at her but shrugged.

“You heard what I said. Since Caitlyn’s your mentor or whatever. Now that she knows it’s me you’re dating she’s probably gonna pull you aside the second she has a chance to be like ‘awr you shoa dayting Jinx is a good idear?’” (Her posh Caitlyn impression was killer)

She almost felt Lux sigh more than she heard it, which only made Jinx’s tension worse. Lux didn’t want to deal with her right now. And to be fair, they’d spent a whole week attached by the hip. Jinx wouldn’t want to deal with her own bullshit either.

“Jinx, that’s not going to happen. I’m an adult, Caitlyn is just my volleyball captain, not my mom. I know you two have a history of tension, but she’s a mature and reasonable person.”

“Yeah, she’s also someone who’s seen the exact list of criminal charges I’ve faced both as a minor and an adult. The only reason she hasn’t thrown me in jail is because I guess my sister is good enough in bed to make the trade. She hates me, she always has. From the start.”

“Jinx, let’s just try to be calm here. You’re stressed, I can see it. Let’s just take a deep breath together, okay?” Then Lux reached out slowly to run her fingers over Jinx’s arms, and Jinx realized just how tense she was. Lux breathed in deeply, and Jinx had no other choice than to follow suit. Then they breathed out, and already Jinx felt her shoulders start to loosen. They went through it twice more, and each time Jinx felt the blinders that were funneling her vision fade with her tension.

“You okay? You’re here with me now?”

Jinx nodded, shame replacing the paranoia. She hated when her own insecurities took over so viscerally like this.

“Let’s just say, for the sake of argument, Caitlyn does talk to me. So what? I’ve already had Marcie try to warn me that you and I shouldn’t be dating. I don’t care what anyone else thinks about you. You’re my amazing, wonderful, super smart girlfriend, and anyone who can’t see you doesn’t have an opinion I care about.”

Call her childish, but flattery was effective on her. She smiled just a bit, letting the clouds that were collecting around her head disperse.

“Don’t forget sexy.” She said.

Lux giggled, taking Jinx by the hand and pulling her close so their bodies were flush, and looking up at her.

“Soo sexy.”

Mmm. God she loved Lux so much. The kiss that came after seemed to last for hours, until Jinx was lifting Lux up to sit on her desk. Her face was so warm, her insides were buzzing, and her mind could only think Lux, Lux, Lux.

They were interrupted when Vi called up asking what they wanted for dinner, and the two of them remembered there were other people in the house. Lux smiled sheepishly, breathing heavy as she stopped herself from dry humping Jinx any longer.

“We should probably wait, right?”

Jinx wanted to say fuck that, rip her clothes off and take her then and there. But, realistically she was right. She took a step back and nodded.

“Yeah, yeah. Are you staying over tonight, or do I need to drive you to campus?”

“Hmm, you’ve been driving all day. I’ll just stay, and then tomorrow morning we can stop by the dorms so I can get clothes and my school supplies before class?”

Jinx nodded, smiling and coming back for another less charged kiss.

“That sounds great.”

--

Dinner was fine, thankfully, Vi made Carne Asada and despite the awkward tension when they’d come home, nothing too eventful happened. It was hard to tell if Caitlyn honestly didn’t care that Lux and Jinx were dating, or if she was purposefully hiding her feelings on the matter. Despite Lux calming her down, a distinct realization struck her as the two of them were laying in bed long after. Part of her fear would be that Caitlyn was going to tell Lux all the things that had been left unsaid.

So, why didn’t she just say them?

“Hey.” Jinx said, reaching over to poke the skin of Lux’s stomach, exposed as her sleep shirt had crept upwards a bit.

“Hey.” Lux responded, turning to look at her. Jinx didn’t meet the look.

“I realized earlier, I mentioned criminal charges. I… haven’t really told you all of it.”

Silence met her, but she could feel Lux’s piercing eyes. She wasn’t quite on edge, but there was still a different energy to her than had been a second ago. It was likely she knew where this was going.

“I thought maybe I should… explain it all.”

“Are you sure?” Lux whispered. “It’s not hard to realize that you’ve been through a lot. If it’s too hard to talk about, I’ll never force it out. But if you’re ready, you can share. I’ll listen.”

“Well, if we really want this to be long term, and I really really do, I have to tell you eventually. You deserve to know the kind of person I am.”

That furrowed Lux’s brow, and she reached to take Jinx’s hand in hers.

“The past doesn’t define us, remember? Just because you’ve been in bad situations doesn’t make you a bad person, Jinx.”

Jinx swallowed hard, shaking her head.

“It’s not- You’ll… just…” Jinx sighed hard, breathing deep the way she had just a few hours ago to calm herself down. How to jump the hurdle… should she just out and say it, or should she ease Lux into it?

No. She needed to say it.

“I’ve killed 7 people.”

Her heart dropped as she said it, and silence followed for a long time after. She finally made eye contact and was met with confusion. Concern. Wariness.

“Though.” Jinx continued, her countenance even. as if that fact didn’t matter to her. 4 years ago it really hadn’t. “Only 4 of those are direct action and intent. You know. Legally. Even then, one of them was self defense in a life threatening situation, one was protecting the life of another person in danger. So that leaves 3 as an accident, and 2 as actionable plain murder. 6 of them happened when I was a minor, and the 4 with intention all while I was under legal guardianship of the most brutal and uncompromising drug lord that Zaun had ever seen. And considering all my shit wrong with my brain, in an actual court of law all the crimes I committed were under coercion, or to protect myself or another. You can ask ol’ cap about it, if you want. She’s the one who arrested me after all. And she’s also the one who advocated that I shouldn’t be punished. Again, my sister must’ve really put the rocks on her.”

She stopped for a second, and turned back to Lux, whose face was just oozing sympathy and something else. Fear, maybe? A squeeze of the hand holding hers was answered with a squeeze back, albeit a bit slow. This was probably an awful idea but she couldn’t put it back in the can now.

“Want me to start from the top?”

Lux nodded.

--

Fire burning. Rain falling. The acrid smell of smoke in the air, mixing with the smell of blood. Dust caked Powder’s hair as she coughed and heaved and crawled out of the bookshelf which had fallen on top of her. Mr Bunny was on the ground, similarly covered in dust and flakes of drywall. She grabbed him and stood up, looking around as her senses returned to her.

What had happened? She’d just tried to turn the lights off. Her ears were ringing, and as she reached up to push her hair, her hand came back warm and wet. She was bleeding from the ears too.

Slowly she stumbled out of the door, coughing again as the smoke filled her lounges. The halls of the office space were dark now, with moonlight peeking through holes that hadn’t been there before. Voices caught her attention through the ringing and she followed it, tripping and falling three different times before she found the door. The rain was louder out here as the world become less fuzzy and muted, and as she looked behind her she realized that the building was on fire.

In the middle of the street, Vi was on her knees, sobbing into Vander’s chest as he lay on the black pavement in a thick pool of blood. Vi looked up at her, and her eyes went wide with confusion.

“Powder? W-Why are you here?”

Vander’s lifeless expression stared back.

She had just wanted to help.

--

“Vi and I were adopted by Vander, a bartender who ran a place called The Last Drop. Vander and Silco used to be partners I think, in their prime Piltover oppression was far worse than it is nowadays or even a few years ago. They split at some point after he adopted us, and they would butt heads often. Silco was just starting to find a place for himself as a power player in the Zaun underworld, and Vander made The Last Drop as a community center for Zaun, a place for people to feel safe in a city that wouldn’t give it to them.

“When I was around 11, Silco kidnapped Vander I guess, I never really got the full details as to why or how. My Sister was only 17 around then, but she took two other boys who Vander looked after, Mylo and Claggor, and tried to get him back. Vi tried to tell me I shouldn’t go, that I was too young. But we’d always done everything together as a family. I’d been on jobs with them before. It happened at an abandoned office space right off the Wharf. I knew Vi was in trouble, so I snuck into the building and tried to short the place’s breaker. Cut the lights to give everyone a chance to run.

“What I didn’t know was that the place had a connecting point to the mining fissures, and a gas leak in the basement. One spark and the whole place lit up. Vander, Claggor, and Mylo all died in the explosion. I never saw Mylo or Claggor, but Vander… I can still see his eyes. It was like looking at a put down dog. Right after, the Enforcers show up and arrest Vi for a break-in we’d done a week before it all happened. Piltover’s Sheriff at the time, Marcus, was in Silco’s pockets, and he kept Vi in Stillwater prison for 7 years to prevent her from testifying against him. I thought Vi had abandoned me because of what I’d done. And then Silco found me, sobbing in the rain next to my adopted father’s corpse. He took me in, and before I knew it I was Silco’s daughter.”

Jinx paused there and looked at Lux again. She squeezed first this time. They both knew she was nowhere near done.

“So, for the next 7 years Silco raises me as his successor. When I’m old enough to work, he starts me as a low level dealer, and eventually I guess intended for me to take over. I learn all about chemistry from the drug trade, and I learn about mechanics from working with firearms and cars. Stealing cars, mostly. When I was 16, There was a deal that went sort of badly.”

--

“You’re kidding.” The Vastaya said, holding the vial of shimmer in his hands. “You’re fucking kidding me. This isn’t what we agreed upon!”

Sevika didn’t budge, stared at him with dangerous eyes, her face scarred from the same explosion that had killed Jinx’s family.

“Don’t act cute. We know you snitched on Scratch. It’s gonna be hell getting that kid out of Juvie now. You fuck with us, you get fucked. Consider that a consolation prize. We’ll see if your junky friends still want to work with you when you come back without the 8 month supply you promised.”

Jinx stood next to her, nowhere near as intimidating. This was meant to be an easy job, it was punishment for messing with Silco’s business. So Silco had sent Jinx with Sevika to see the hard work, to see that sometimes someone needed to be snubbed on the nose when they stepped out of line.

The two of them turned away, taking the first steps to leave their wannabe rival to his own fate. Only, a hand had suddenly grabbed Jinx’s shoulder, and she was yanked backwards. A knife was being pressed into her neck. Sevika drew on him immediately, and the Vastaya pressed the knife closer.

“Don’t fucking move! Don’t move an inch or I cut her throat. You wanna be responsible for his favorite pet bleeding out on my carpets? Huh?! Don’t fucking move!”

Sevika eased back, but didn’t lower her weapon.

“You’re making a big mistake here. Let Jinx go, and you can still come out of this with something. Maybe your life, if you’re lucky.”

“No, fuck you!” He screamed. “You get me the shimmer I fucking paid for! You give me my fucking shimmer and I let her go. You fucking hear me?!” Then he pointed his knife at Sevika to run the point in.

Jinx stamped on his foot the moment his knife was off her neck. He screamed and stumbled backwards, and Jinx spun without a second of hesitation. He fell back onto the ground with a smoking bullet hole in his neck. Jinx’s hand was shaking as she held her handgun, stepping back a few paces from his bleeding out form.

She heard Sevika holster and light up a cigarette. It was passed to her in a second.

“Good shot, kid.”

She didn’t even know the Vastaya’s name.

He had brought two guns for backup. Sevika didn’t comment when Jinx shot first and didn’t bother to ask questions. Just grumbled that Silco was going to make her clean up Jinx’s mess.

--

“I’d never actually done it before. Shot someone. Dad had taken me to shooting ranges all the time, and I always knew I might need to protect myself in our work. I’d just neve really planned to do it, I guess. Then I did it 3 times in one day. The first time was self defense, really. I mean, he had a knife on me. It’s not like I’d never had a knife pulled but… I could see the concern in Sevika’s eyes. She was worried that he’d actually kill me, then and there. For the first time, I thought I was really going to die.

“The worst part is, I was more worried about how that would make Dad’s job more difficult. If his teenage daughter was murdered in a drug deal, it would put him in the limelight. Suicidal ideation’s a bitch, y’know?”

Another squeeze. It was quickly becoming code in this all as ‘I’m here for you.’ And thank Janna for that, because if she wasn’t Jinx probably would have broken down. She felt so raw.

“But the other guys… I don’t know. I’d like to say it’s because I thought they were drawing on me for killing their boss. I might’ve just done it because the first one excited me. That’s so awful to say, right? My adrenaline was going crazy from the first scrap, and I knew I could pull on them before they had a chance. So I did. Dad took me off the front line jobs after that. 

“And then we get Vi back into the story. Around the time I turned 18(ish) Detective Caitlyn Kiramman begins investigating a connected chain of drug deals organized by a seemingly invisible crime lord. Around the same time, another deal goes bad with Sevika at the head, and there’s a big firefight topside between us and some Piltover organized crime heads. It was an overextension, and gave Caitlyn the lead she needed, because one of our guys got booked.

“That led her to Stillwater, where she met Vi. Basically, Vi promises to help her find Silco if she helps Vi find her sister, me. Things keep getting more and more tense with Dad’s work, and like 50% of it was on my fuckups. I… did some bad shit. I was really unhinged from learning that Vi was around again, everything I had based my reality on started to fall apart. Remember how I mentioned I tried to kill myself? I thought I’d stop causing so many problems if I wasn’t around anymore. I sort of failed, didn’t shoot quite right, and then all the shimmer shit happens. It… it leads into Caitlyn and Vi confronting Silco after learning about Marcus’ whole conspiracy with Silco. I’m there too and… I may have tried to kill Caitlyn. Like I said I was just… untethered. It’s like nothing was real anymore.

“And then. I see Silco draw on Vi.”

--

It had happened in an instant, all the monsters surrounding her were dispelled into sickening clarity. She heard Silco’s gun prime and point at Vi, and she’d drawn and shot before she even realized it.

3 shots, he’d fired one at Vi and missed. All in the torso. It only took a moment to realize the enormity of her actions, and she dropped her gun and ran to him. He’d died in her arms.

Then she was on the ground, arms behind her back as Caitlyn cuffed her. She didn’t even struggle. Just sobbed as she lost her third father.

--

“I just… I couldn't stop myself. He was going to hurt my sister, so I shot him. He loved me through it all, all the ways he’d fucked up my head, all the lies he’d told me, all the people he’d hurt. He’d loved me more than he loved anything. And I repaid him the only way I know how. I ruined him. I Jinxed him.”

Jinx didn’t realize she was crying until Lux was brushing away her tears, and she realized Lux was crying too, but putting on a brave face.

“So yeah… Because a majority of my crimes happened under the wardship of Silco they were considered under duress. I killed Silco to protect the life of another person, and the court ruled in favor of Caitlyn’s pleas. I know she didn’t want to do it, I know she wanted me to rot behind bars for everything I’d done. But she didn’t. It sucks but I literally owe my life to her. Otherwise I’d be rotting in Stillwater instead of going to the Academy. I’d never have met you without Caitlyn.”

“Oh Jinx.”

Suddenly she was being held again by Lux, who was fully crying now. It was strange, whenever Lux cried, it was like her own tears started to dry up. Keeping Lux happy and safe seemed so much more important than whatever she was crying for. She pulled Lux in and held her close, both of them sinking into their shared comfort.

“Sorry if that’s all too much. I-I’m not the same person I was then. I’ve spoken with therapists and health professionals and all that shit. It’s not like I’m all good but, I’m not nearly as gone as I was as Silco’s daughter. It’s like that part of my life has this film on it now. I can remember the feelings, the warmth, the fear, but it’s like I was only ever partly present for it. Ever since I thought Vi left me.”

“I wish I could’ve been there, I wish I could’ve helped you, I wish you’d never been made to do those awful things. It’s so unfair.”

Jinx smiled wry and tired, and buried her face into Lux’s shoulder.

“I can’t believe you still feel bad for me after I told you that I’ve killed people. I think your bad-girl kink might be pushing a little far here, Blondie.”

That made Lux laugh through her sniffles, and she nuzzled in closer.

“I’m… I don’t really know how to feel about it. But… I’ve said it a thousand times. The past doesn’t define you Jinx. I know you enough to know you aren’t that person anymore. Whoever you were when you were with Silco, you can be free of that. You can change, you can grow, you don’t have to be trapped in his image of you.”

Her eyes went wide at that, and Jinx shook a little in Lux’s arms. She was right.

Both of them had to go downstairs to get water, because their crying had left them awfully dehydrated.

--

The morning after Jinx groaned in protest when Lux woke her up early, but the two of them had to get to Lux’s dorm before class so Lux could put on something clean and drop her things off. It was unfortunate, but they’d both agreed to it so, oh well.

The campus lot was full up again with classes back in session, and she actually had to fight a bit to find them a nice spot. Once inside, they took a slow shower together and dressed in fresh, clean, sunscreen smell free clothes. Jinx got her bag together and was ready to see professor Viktor again when Lux opened an envelope, read the letter inside, and froze.

“What’s up?” Jinx asked.

Lux put a hand up to her mouth, and handed the letter to Jinx. Anxiety spiked in her chest as she took it.

Luxanna,

It’s been quite some time since we spoke face to face. I hope your studies in Piltover have been proving useful for you, and I hope this letter finds you well. I apologize for its timing.

I’m writing this as a courtesy, because soon you’ll likely be hearing more from your mother about a few of the topics I’ve detailed. I decided a letter would be more discreet than a phone call, considering. The family has been talking, my husband and your father especially, about you studying in Piltover, and your future here in the Crownguard family. 

This semester at Piltover Academy is going to be your last. Your mother and father agree that considering our talks with the Lightshields, it seems a marriage between you and Jarvan the 4th is well in the interests of both of our families and nigh inevitable. Given that this would need a respectable period of courting in the public eye, you are to finish your studies here in Demacia.

I was also recently sent a picture of you by a trusted friend of mine, which I’ve included a copy of. Don’t worry, I haven’t shown anyone else. Given all of this, Garen and I will be visiting you in Piltover in two weeks. As the only 3 reasonable people in our family, we’re going to figure out how to un-fuck this mess.

With care, your Aunt,

Tianna Crownguard.

Then, along with the letter was a single polaroid of the dark hallways of the Piltover Academy audience hall. Her and Lux were in their lovely matching attires, a perfect dress and a princely suit, and they were kissing passionately.

Chapter Text

Lux

--

Neither of them knew the appropriate way to respond. For a while Lux sat on the edge of her bed reading it over and over again while Jinx paced from one side of the room to the other. The atmosphere had completely shifted in an instant, suddenly it was taking everything Lux had just to breathe. Even then, her chest was so tight, tighter than it had ever been before. When she’d found Jinx after her overdose, she’d been so shocked and forced to focus on Jinx that she hadn’t even been able to register her body except for the churning in her stomach. This was the opposite, she was hyper aware of everything, every twitch of her hands, every labored breath. Everything was fuzzy all of the sudden, it was like she was wearing blinders.

It was unequivocally a disaster. Everything about the letter was a nightmare. She’d already known that her parents were debating on her studying abroad and her prospective engagement, but having reality thrown in her face was so much different.

And to top it all off, someone had discovered them. Physical evidence, a printed photo of her and Jinx sent to a direct family member. What if the picture leaked? What if her family all already knew? What if Tianna and Garen were going to force her to leave with them and go home so she wouldn’t sully the Crownguard name more than she already had?

And gods if Tianna told Eldred? He could practically convince her father of anything, how far would he go? She was on the verge of throwing up again, pressing a hand to her stomach and the other to her mouth. Jinx noticed, sprinting to grab the trashcan and get it to her. It was just in time.

Things were still fuzzy after that, but Jinx had given her a washcloth and had apparently replaced the can with a new bag. She had the awareness to say thank you at least, her body doing its best to take care of her while she entered crisis mode. It was hard to tell how much time had passed before Jinx sat down next to her. Lux turned to look her in the eyes, and Jinx looked just as shaken. Only, she looked angrier.

“What are you gonna do?” Jinx asked, a mix of concern and frustration clear in her tone.

Lux looked back down at her hands clenched together so tight that her knuckles were going white.

“I don’t know.” Lux whispered.

It was the truth. She had no idea what to do. All at once it felt like the control and freedom she’d slowly been grasping for herself was about to be taken away, like a toy ripped away from a child who won’t pay attention. 

Jinx was back up and pacing again, as erratic in her movements as always. Her hands went too and fro, behind her back, pulling at her short hair, rubbing her eyes and her head, pressing into her temples.

“Okay, okay.” Jinx said, visibly restraining herself. It made Lux feel just a tiny bit better, normally something like this would have set Jinx off into the stratosphere. She was holding back, trying to be the calm one for Lux’s sake. She wasn’t exactly doing a good job, but it was the effort that counted. To Lux, at least.

“Okay we just- we just have to take this one step at a time. That’s how I handle this sort of thing, just one action at a time. Okay, okay shut up, shut up.” She whispered those to herself, as if talking to someone Lux wasn’t aware was present. “First step. Are you going to meet with your aunt and brother?”

Lux clutched the letter, and shrugged.

“I have to Jinx. I can’t not.”

Jinx nodded, twirling in place twice before stopping.

“Are you sure though? You don’t have to if you don’t want to.”

“Yes I have to. They’re my family, Jinx. Garen has supported me more than anyone else in my life ever has, he’s always had my back. Not to say you don’t support me. He’s just had 20 more years than you to do it.”

Jinx froze as if she were caught, Lux knew her well enough at this point to know what might catch her off. She was totally going to take it as a competition if Lux hadn’t clarified. Instead, she nodded, and went back to pacing again.

“Okay, okay yeah. So you meet them. Do you want me to come with you?”

Hmm… that wasn’t an awful idea. Even though it was about her family, this affected Jinx as well. Then again, bringing her might make things worse. There was always a chance Tianna openly disapproved, or Jinx said or did something without thinking it through and offended her. Garen she didn’t have to worry about (probably…) but it was hard to account for her stern and cold aunt.

“You should be there. I need your support, but you have to promise you won’t do anything without thinking about it.”

Jinx groaned and pulled her hair again.

“Blondie you know I can’t promise that. BPD? ADHD? PTSD? You forgot about that shit? I don’t trust myself enough to not explode if your aunt is being a royal bee-atch. And I’m not trying to find an excuse, I’m just saying that I’m not historically predictable.”

It was a good point. She trusted Jinx well enough, and she didn’t blame her for it, but they needed to be realistic about their plan.

“Okay.” Lux said, their discussion calming her down. Slowly this was turning into a joint panic session into a strategy meeting. “What… What if you had medication? I did a little bit of research after you told me about this, would anti-anxiety meds help?”

Jinx raised her hand up in a shaky ‘ehhh’ gesture.

“I mean, yes, in theory. There’s a few major problems with that option though. 1: It’ll make me sleepy. 2: I’d need a prescription, and my medical advisor already thinks anxiety meds would be a bad mix with what I already have. 3: With or without a prescription anti-anxiety meds are fuckin expensive.”

Lux closed her eyes and put her hands to her forehead. There had to be a way to make sure Jinx was going to be stable enough that she wouldn’t cause an explosion with Tianna. A way that didn’t involve putting Jinx on meds that they didn’t have easy access too and may put her off her game. Something that was proven to work, wouldn’t inhibit herself too severely, and they could have ready for two weeks.

A horrid, horrid idea hit Lux, and she looked at Jinx.

“What?” Jinx said.

Lux nearly didn’t say it, because it was honestly a really stupid plan. But they were desperate.

“What if you were on Shimmer?”

Jinx’s eyes went wide.

“You’re joking.”

“No. I’m serious.” Lux said with a shaky inhale. “Garen and Tianna should be getting into town two Mondays from now. On our taper schedule, you’ll be getting a dose the Tuesday right after. So, we plan to meet with them Tuesday in the afternoon. You take your hit maybe 2 hours ahead of time, so when we’re meeting up with them most of the visual indicators of your high are gone. I’ve noticed that right at the end of your high you act really… normal I guess. Not- not normal like ‘a normal person’ but you’re really even keel. You just sort of say things how they are, and you don’t react as emotionally as you usually do. Like uh… logic. You get really logic driven.”

Jinx’s eyes were still wide and her mouth hanging wide open, utter disbelief on her face. After a moment she tried to stutter something out, but stopped. She shook her head with a laugh and spoke.

“That’s such a bad idea. Shimmer isn’t predictable you know, I’m an addict! That’s just adding another layer of instability. I mean what if I break our schedule, or what if it lasts longer than usual, or what if…”

“Do you have a better idea?” Lux asked, perhaps a little too sharply.

That shut Jinx up.

“I mean. No.” As she said it she gritted her teeth, obviously frustrated. “In a better world we could just trust me to not blow up at something so obviously important but- lucky us, I’m a fucking time bomb.”

“Stop.” Lux cut in. “No spiraling.”

“But if I wasn’t a fucking psycho-”

“Jinx! I said stop!”

Jinx visibly recoiled, curling in on herself as she took a step back.

Fuck. She didn't mean to snap like that. The frustration of seeing Jinx start to lose it when she was the one having a family crisis had started to mount on her.

“Sorry.” Lux sighed, putting her head in her hands. Jinx was at her side in moments, a hand on her back and leaning in close.

“No no, I’m sorry.” Jinx said. “I started to lose it. I’m just… I’m just really scared Lux. I don’t want you to go away.”

“I know.” Lux said, taking her free hand and squeezing, happy to have her. “I don’t want to leave either. Let’s just shelve the shimmer plan for now. You’re right, it’s risky to try and mess with it. It’s even riskier to try and have you rely on shimmer when we’re trying to break your dependance. We’ll just… we’ll just have to do without any special plans or tricks. I trust you Jinx, I do. Even if you don’t trust yourself. It’s not like you have to win a debate against them, I just need you there to support me. Hold my hand, back me up. You do a good job of supporting me sober all the time. How is this different?”

Jinx furrowed her bro, eyes darting back and forth for a second. But she nodded.

“Yeah. Okay.”

Lux pulled her phone out to send Garen a text about where they wanted to meet up, and was met with the realization that it was noon.

“Class started an hour ago. Might as well just skip the rest, we originally planned on skipping today anyway, right? Professor Viktor probably thinks we're skipping to make out.”

That got a chuckle out of Jinx.

“Probably.”

They were silent for a while, holding each other in the wake of the letter and leaning their weight on the other. Before she was able to let any dark thoughts return, Jinx spoke again.

“I mean, we could make him right. If you wanted.”

Lux scoffed and looked at her.

“I just threw up like half an hour ago. You want to make out?”

“I mean, go brush your teeth? Mouthwash? Fuck it, let’s just take a shower together at that point. Then we can… you know.”

A soft smile crept onto her face, and Lux was reminded what about Jinx she loved.

“You’re so adorable.” She said, “It sounds like you want more than kissing, but you don’t want to ask after all that.”

Jinx gave a sheepish smile, caught red handed.

“It’s not my fault.” Jinx said. “Even when you’re in the middle of a breakdown you look perfect. Like, it’s awful but a few times there I was thinking: she’d look so fucking hot with mascara running from tears.”

That one earned a full belly laugh.

“You really are such a little weirdo.”

“Yeah.” Jinx said with a wicked smile. “And you love it.”

After a long hot shower with their arms wrapped around, Lux applied a nice amount of mascara and let Jinx work to earn that image.

--

Honestly Lux was never the kind of person who looked forward to the weekend. Where other kids would get to spend their weekends hanging out, or playing outside, Lux usually just spent hers studying, and indulging in what few hobbies she was able to do. At least for most of her childhood, she actually preferred spending her day at school, where she could be around other people and play sports and work on photography projects.

But, this week Lux actually couldn’t wait for the weekend. Ever since that letter had come it had been hard to focus on lectures, and even harder to focus on studying at home. Jinx helped, she was always a great distraction, but Lux did need to do well in her studies. She couldn’t just spend the whole week using Jinx as an escape mechanism.

Volleyball practice was exactly what she needed. It was productive so she didn’t feel like she was wasting time, it was social so she’d feel a connection to other people, and it required both her body and her brain so she wouldn’t have time to think about Tiana and Garen coming in just over a week.

She was starting to recognize the front desk workers at the rec center now, who’d smile and wave when she came in. She changed into her work out clothes, and rather than going right to Gym 3 Lux headed for the indoor track, where Caitlyn was already waiting.

“Hey.” She said, starting her stretches.

“Hey.” Lux replied with a wave, setting her bag down and joining. Caitlyn noticed the lack of enthusiasm in her voice immediately.

“Everything alright?”

In all honesty, Lux wasn’t really sure how to answer that question. The past few weeks had been such a rollercoaster. Jinx’s overdose, her fuckup at the Gala, their time on vacation, and now this letter from Tianna… she felt like she’d barely had any time to breathe. She was rocketing from stressed to relaxed at rates that Lux didn’t appreciate, and she just wanted a long period of time where things were normal. Not bad but not crazy good either.

“I don’t know.” Lux admitted. “It’s been a crazy few weeks.”

“I thought your vacation would have helped with that. Funny, by the way, I knew you and Jinx were going on vacation to Shurima at the same time but still hadn’t put it together that you were connected.”

“That is kinda funny.” Lux said, giving a weak smile. “It did help. Well, it helped with all the things I had to deal with in the weeks before my vacation. Then I get back, and the day after I get something maybe worse.”

Caitlyn was silent for a few moments, her brow furrowed as if she was looking for something to say, but couldn’t find it.

“This might be incredibly presumptuous of me, and please don’t take it the wrong way but, I have to imagine Jinx is somewhat involved. Yes?”

It wasn’t a direct confirmation of what Jinx had feared, but it still made Lux bristle a bit. She was tired of people who were older than her trying to control her life, and what she chose. It wasn’t like she was some stupid high schooler, she was an adult.

“If you have something you want to say about her and I, you don’t need to dance around. Just say it.”

“No, no.” Caitlyn backpedaled. “I wasn’t trying to imply anything bad, I promise. I was just trying to level with you. Jinx is a very intelligent and very creative woman but she can be… volatile. I just sort of assumed you needed relationship advice, so I was going to try and help. I’m dating her sister after all, they are more similar than they are different.”

Lux looked at Caitlyn, who smiled warmly. She was being genuine, Lux was just being paranoid from how emotionally raw that letter had left her.

“Yeah, sorry.” Lux said. The two of them stood up as they finished stretching, and letting Caitlyn set the pace, the two of them began jogging the track. They had started doing this right after Lux had joined, since Lux was pretty out of shape. The point of rec leagues, while competitive in their own right, was for social connection and to exercise. If she just wanted to have fun she didn’t need to join the team for anything more than practice. But a taste of high level volleyball had been all Lux needed to want more than that. She wanted to compete at their level, and for that Lux both needed to raise her stamina and build the muscles in her legs. Her arms too, honestly for rough receives, but they were going one step at a time.

And step one was jogging for an hour before practice. Lux was doing her own runs most mornings as well, but this was now a pre-practice ritual for them. It was nice, they always had fun conversations.

This conversation would be less fun.

“When I got back to my dorm, there was a letter waiting there for me.” Lux said. “It was from my aunt. Basically she was warning me that my family has decided that this is going to be my last semester here at the Academy, and I’ll be transferring home to the Royal University of Demacia come January. Also, she basically told me I’m going to be put into an arranged marriage with the heir of the Lightshield family, and also that she knew I was dating a woman. At the Gala someone saw Jinx and I kissing, I guess, and sent a picture to my aunt. So, yeah, I’m basically dead.”

“Wow.” Caitlyn breathed out. “That’s quite a lot.”

“You’re telling me.” Lux sighed, trying to keep her posture straight for their run.

“If you’d like, I also come from a wealthy and prestigious family, you know. I could offer some advice.”

Lux shrugged, which Caitlyn took as permission.

“The whole ‘caught kissing a woman’ thing I’m afraid I can’t really say much on. Piltover and Zaun aren’t like Demacia, we’ve never had the anti-queer rhetoric and culture that exists there. And we don’t really do political marriages either, so that’s not in my direct wheelhouse. But, I can still speak as a rich daughter who didn’t do what her parents wanted.” Then she smiled again at Lux, which did make her feel a bit better.

“My Mum was actually a councilwoman. The Kiramman house is a long standing matriarchy, the woman of the house would always be the first born daughter, and would always maintain a prestigious position in upper class Piltovan society. I broke that rule pretty steadily when I, the only child, became a Piltover Warden, and was later promoted to a detective for the Enforcers. Obviously my parents weren’t very pleased with my choice in career, in fact they spent a fair amount of time putting red tape and barricades in the way.

“And I can say with certainty they did not approve of my relationship with Vi. A convict from Zaun with no education and no prospects for social success? Ridiculous, my Mum had said. But when they met her, my Mum and Dad saw how much we loved each other and how happy Vi made me, and they knew my mind couldn’t be changed. We had a really rocky relationship for a while, I had basically thrown their plans for me out of the window. But we talked, and they knew I had to make my life my own. Now we’re close again, though they’re both retired and have far too much time on their hands. You’ll get to meet them once the tournament starts, I’m sure they’ll show up.”

Lux’s parents had never come to any of their high school tournaments. Lux was basically a bench warmer, but she had gotten some time in official matches. Garen was the only one who ever came to watch.

“My point is.” Caitlyn said. “Communication is the most important aspect of any relationship. Your parents don’t get to choose your life, obviously, but you had to be the one to tell them that. I’m going to go out on a limb and say you aren’t too fond of this Lightshield heir.”

Lux shook her head.

“And, should I assume that you aren’t fond of men altogether?”

Now Lux nodded.

“Well, it sucks Lux but you have to tell them. You need to be honest, confront your family and say ‘Family, I’m not going to be marrying who you want me too. I’m a lesbian, and this is my girlfriend, Jinx. I won’t be coming home to study in Demacia, I’m going to continue my education in Piltover.’”

“But what if they aren’t okay with that?” Lux said. “I know my parents are homophobic, I have no idea what they might do. They might just cut me off, or they might even try and legally trap me into it. If they threaten to stop supporting me financially, I’ll have no choice. I can’t afford the tuition for the Academy without their money.”

Caitlyn hummed, putting a finger to her chin as her brow furrowed.

“That does make things difficult. My parents would have never threatened estrangement. Do you think your parents would really go that far?”

“I don’t know.” Lux admitted. “They’re so serious and severe. I was basically sheltered for my entire childhood by them. And… my aunt's husband, Eldred, he’s the worst of it. He married into the Crownguards, arranged as well, but my father would listen to nearly anything he said. I can’t count the amount of times I’ve overheard him saying something awful about queer people.” 

“That’s scary, I’m sorry that you’re having to face it. But unfortunately, it’s something you do have to face, one way or another. And to be clear, writing them a letter to fuck off and telling them you are living in Piltover from now on does count as facing it. You just can’t ignore the confrontation and let what happens happen. That’s how you end up married to this man you don’t like in a place you don’t want to be.”

Even just the thought of having to marry Jarvan, live as his wife, raise his kids… it made her so sick she wanted to vomit (Again). Caitlyn noticed, and gave her a light slap on the back.

“Hey come on, chin up. We’ve still got practice after all. Just remember you aren’t alone, you know? You’ve got people in your corner. I know we didn’t meet all that long ago, but you’re a member of my team now, and I’m your captain. Not to mention you’re dating my girlfriend’s sister. And speaking of, you’ve got a girlfriend who is willing to do some very stupid things for the people she loves. You’ll get through this.”

She’d figured out quickly that Caitlyn was an analytical person by nature. It was likely what made her such a good investigator, her eyes were always open and she could take in details that other people often missed. So, when Caitlyn said she’d be alright, Lux had to admit that it made a bit of the doom and gloom go away. Because if Caitlyn said it, well then it must have been true.

--

BAM

Aibhlinn’s spike was as strong as always, her incredible vertical jump allowing her to easily surpass tall blockers. Lux dived as the block skimmed Sejuani’s hands, but she was just an arms length too short as the ball landed right on the back line.

“Damn.” Lux groaned, taking Riven’s hand as she was lifted up to her feet.

“Keep at it. I can tell you’re getting better.” She said.

Lux smiled and nodded, but once Riven went back into position Lux couldn’t help the scowl that found her face. Her hamstrings and knees were screaming at her, this set had her constantly running back and forth and diving, and her knee pads could only give her so much support.

“You alright?” Caitlyn asked.

“Yeah. I think I need new knee pads.”

The ones she had now were the same ones she had worn in highschool. And in highschool, Lux had been a shrimp. She’d gained weight since then, a majority of it going to her legs. Not that she was complaining, it made her much more shapely than her twiggy high school limbs. Plus she was starting to build up her thigh muscles, if they barely fit now they certainly wouldn’t fit in a month or 2.

(She smiled a bit to herself, remembering how when she told Jinx she was going to focus on building muscle in her thighs, Jinx looked so excited she might explode. “Nothing wrong with my favorite earmuffs getting warmer.” Jinx had said, which had left Lux laughing on the floor for 10 minutes.)

“Then if you’re not busy when we finish, let’s go shopping together. I need to buy some new volleyball shoes anyway.”

“Oh!” Kadira called from the other side of the net. “Let me come too! Winter is so cold in Piltover compared to Bel’Zhun, and I need a new winter coat.”

Before she realized it, several of them were making plans for after practice to make a team shopping trip to the local sports and camping center. She hadn’t really intended to start something, but it did feel good that they all wanted too. From the scoreboard, Coach Zayne gave his whistle a quick FWEEET .

“Alright ladies, we can figure out plans later. It’s practice time, aint it?”

“Yes coach.” They all said, and Zayne nodded.

Coach Zayne, Lux learned, was one of Caitlyn’s coworkers on the Piltover Wardens. Police in Piltover fell into two separate classifications, the Wardens, who were day to day officers who mostly patrolled the streets of Piltover and were more like crisis responders, and the Enforcers, special operations police and detective divisions that dealt with more extreme and dangerous issues. Organized crime, large scale conspiracy, and unfortunately riot control. There had been a long standing bias in the Enforcers that was aimed at Zaun and contributed on a large scale to Zaunite oppression.

Zayne Asako was a Zaunite who’d apparently spent years as an undercover informant for Caitlyn in an operation against a criminal organization rooted in Zaun’s upper class and some corrupt Piltover merchants. He’d had a pretty significant injury in the climax of that operation, so nowadays he was more of a communications officer. He loved volleyball as much as Caitlyn did, and his father was apparently a coach for a professional team in Zaun. So with his injury, this was the best way for him to participate in the sport.

At least, that’s what Caitlyn had explained to her. He was tall, broad shouldered, and his tan skin was absolutely covered in tattoos. His left arm from the elbow down was prosthetic, but it seemed to hinder him very little. It was something with his heart that prevented him from playing, apparently. He had a rough but fun demeanor, giving solid and tough advice while not putting you down while doing it. 

Lux thought Jinx would probably idolize him if they ever met given how cool he was, but Lux was far too shy to try and talk to him casually.

From the other side of the net, Najah suddenly switched up her Serve approach as the next rally started. She had been attacking with her wicked jump serves so far, but suddenly she switched to a floater. It wobbled and dropped far quicker than Lux had expected, and again the ball hit the court without her even managing to touch it.

She shook her head at her own mistake, tossing the ball back to the other team.

“Hey, you’ll get the next one.” Caitlyn said. She always did that, encourage you whether you failed or succeeded. Lux nodded, crouching low. 

“Pick your feet up kid.” Zayne called from the side. “Split step, remember? Don’t get lead in your shoes. Be ready as soon as they hit, not after.”

“Got it.” Lux said, not at all confident that she did. Even with Caitlyn’s advice from earlier, it was so hard to focus with the looming threat of her family creeping towards her. The constant anxiety of what was going to happen to her. Would she be thrown out? Left without a family? Having to fend for herself after a lifetime of not being taught how?

Najah was back on a jump serve judging by her running approach, and forced Lux’s attention back to practice. Just like Zayne said, she hopped up slightly. Split step, something she’d never learned in high school, was a technique used in a variety of sports, not just in Volleyball. It involved a small hop in place right before going to receive or save a ball. Doing so would reset your form, widening your stance and lowering your center of gravity. Then when you landed, you could push off your feet towards the attack, giving you a few extra moments to match your technique and reach the ball.

She landed right when Najah’s hand hit the ball, and Lux bolted to her right as the ball came shooting towards Riven. Of everyone, they wanted Riven to receive the ball the least. In volleyball you can’t touch the ball twice in a row, so if Riven were to get the first pass, she wouldn’t be able to set the ball to a spiker for the second pass.

Lux still had to dive even with her jump, but still she just wasn’t close enough to make it. Riven had to get it at the last second, awkwardly bending low as the ball went up, way off center.

“Cover!”

Sejuani had to move back from the net to get the second touch, passing awkwardly to Caitlyn on the back row for a pipe attack. Kadira blocked it with a heavy thud, and the ball slammed down on their side before Lux could even get up to try for the save.

“That’s a wrap, crew!” Zayne yelled as he flipped over the score. 

Aibhlinn’s team VS Caitlyn’s team 

Set 3: 25-21

“Captain, I think the stuff just got here. Help me bring it in?”

Caitlyn nodded, jogging to follow Zayne out. Lux walked off the court with everyone else, getting water and trying to regulate her breathing. In high school they’d never played teams with attacks so strong that the libero became a featured role, but if this was the case the other teams played Lux needed to improve. It was just hard to think about improving when your mind was so dominated with the fear of familial isolation and losing her support system.

“Sorry you had to get the first touch.” Lux said to Riven, trying to not sound too bitter at her own mistake.

“Hey, deep breath.” Riven said again beside her. “You’re just getting started again, right? You don’t have to be the best libero in the world you know.” Lux looked at her, and nodded.

“I know. I do really want to keep improving, I’m- Just… a lot on my mind right now. Hard to focus.”

Riven nodded as Sejuani walked up too.

“Any one I need to beat up?”

Lux chuckled and shook her head, but then Kadira was there too.

“We’re beating someone up? Let me join! No one messes with our little libero!”

“No no.” Lux laughed out. “No beating anyone up. It’s just family stuff. We’re uh… about to have a big argument about my future, I think.”

There was a collective hum among them, and Lux felt a sense of solidarity with these women she just wasn’t quite used to.

“You’re our teammate now.” Sejuani said as Riven and Kadira nodded. “Officially, on the roster and all. I don’t know if you’ve noticed but we’re a warband of misfits here. I’m not from Piltover, hell I’m not even from a city like Piltover. I’m from a lonely little country town in the Freljord, practically a commune. When I moved here, I didn’t know anyone or anything about this place. But that’s what’s so great about team sports. Once I joined, I wasn’t alone. You aren’t alone either.”

“Yeah, on and off the court.” Riven added. 

Kadira cut in to say, with a hearty laugh, “You might be a college student, but compared to us you're the baby of the group. We can’t help but support you! If you ever need a shoulder just let us know, we’re happy to help.”

Before Lux could respond to them, Caitlyn and Zayne came back inside with two cardboard boxes.

“Alright everyone, jackets are here.” Caitlyn called. There was a murmur of excitement as they all walked up, Lux included. She hadn’t realized they would have any team clothing besides a uniform.

One by one they distributed them. Eventually Caitlyn called her name out, handing her a royal blue zip up hoodie in a light and breathable fabric, with gold lettering on the back that read:

Sapphilite Row

Volleyball Club

And on the front, in a smaller version of the same font, above the breast on the left side it read: 

Crownguard

#13

Libero

13, an unlucky number. Just like her Jinx. Jinx, who had taught her so many amazing things about herself, introduced her to so many kind people, pushed her to try new things and explore the person she wanted to be. 

Caitlyn walked up, her own jacket on, and gave Lux another pat on the back.

“Welcome to the team, Lux.”

Even if her parents cut her out, even if they wouldn’t support her, even if they tried to force her to come home, Lux would be okay. She had a new family now. Her partner, her friends, and her team.

Lux had to turn away from everyone to hide the tears that started to fall as she carefully slipped the hoodie on.

Chapter Text

Jinx

--

Jinx had always found it difficult to focus during classes. Actually, Jinx found it hard to focus on basically everything that forced her to sit down in one place and listen or watch someone do something. She learned by doing, not watching, even when it was someone she respected like Viktor, just having to stare at a board for two hours wasn’t for her. Her brain simply wasn’t wired for it, and she simply wasn’t willing to fork up money every month for Adderall.

Picking back up after autumn break made that even more true. Jinx’s mind was dominated by the letter Lux had gotten, and what it could mean for their future. If things didn’t go to plan, she could lose Lux, watch her be taken away and confined to a life she didn’t want, a life trapped and married to a man she didn’t care about, a porcelain doll on display.

No, no she couldn’t think like that. Even if Lux’s parents tried to force her to come back, Jinx wouldn’t let them. She wouldn’t let anyone hurt Lux like that. Though, realistically there was only one recourse she could take herself, and it would probably end with her being labeled an international terrorist. That wouldn’t be so bad, she was already a proponent of organized drug violence in Zaun, what was another label like that?

Well, even if they sucked, Lux might not be appreciative if she Jinx actually killed her family. Eldred probably wouldn’t get a wink but Pieter and Augatha might not make her happy. Garen was definitely off limits, Tianna was questionable.

No no no she couldn’t seriously consider the ramifications of murdering Lux’s family in cold blood. Could she? No , definitively no. That wasn’t who she was anymore, violence wasn’t her first option when things didn't go her way. She was this Jinx now, not Silco’s Jinx, not Powder, not the little boy who watched her parents die. This Jinx was healing, with a sister who loved her and an amazing girlfriend, and friends who cared about her.

“Jinx, you hear me?”

Jinx snapped her eyes open, darting around the lecture hall. Everyone, including good ol Professor Talis at the front of the hall, was looking right at her.

“Sorry, huh?”

Jayce huffed a bit, gesturing towards the white board where different equations were listed, leading down to an empty spot where an answer should be.

“I was asking if you could give us the answer.”

“Uh, yeah just give me a second to look through it.”

There were a few giggles and murmurs from around her. She wasn’t sure how anything she said was funny but, that wasn’t a bad thing. Jayce did not think this was very funny, obviously.

“If you’d been listening, you’d know we’ve been doing this problem piece by piece, not all at once. Try to keep your eyes open and your head up the rest of the lecture? You might be Viktor’s prized student, but you could try to pay a bit more attention in my class, ‘kay?”

Ugh. She hated this fucking guy. Why did he have to be dating Viktor?

“Sir, drill sergeant, sir.” Jinx said, making a loose salute. Another round of giggles echoed out, and Jayce rolled his eyes before picking a different student to give the answer.

Jinx did not fulfill Jayce’s wish for the rest of the lecture.

--

//Jinx: Are we hanging out today? I’m done with my classes, and I’m thinkin about greasy french fries… we could share//

//Lux: Normally I’d love too, but we’ve kind of been attached by the hip since we got home… I have to pick it up a bit with my school work, do you mind if we just have some space tonight?//

//Lux: Sorry I don’t want to like make you feel like I don’t want you around but you are really distracting and if you come over we’re just gonna end up having sex and I’m not gonna get any work done//

//Jinx: It’s fine, idc//

Jinx groaned as she dropped her phone onto the bed, turning onto her stomach and sticking her face into the pillow. Lux’s reasons were valid, but it still frustrated her. Nothing felt quite as good as holding Lux in her arms while they cuddled in bed, pressing into her golden hair and running hands along soft skin. More than anything she just wanted to be there for Lux. Since they’d started dating, hell even before, Lux was almost always there for Jinx when bad things happened to her.

The overdose, her breakdowns, her withdrawal attack at the bar, the nightmare that was her symposium presentation… if they were both being honest, Jinx was getting way more out of Lux than Lux was getting out of Jinx. Logically she knew that their relationship wasn’t something built off of ‘value’ but it still hurt to feel like she was only getting and not giving.

If there was one thing Jinx was good at, it was making things up to feel bad about. She was a motherfucking pro at that. And Janna above, she wished she wasn’t.

After half an hour of staring at the wall and another 20 minutes of watching Kuro bask in his light, Jinx decided her room was not enough to keep her brain active at the moment. Downstairs she plopped down on the couch and scrolled for something to watch. She wasn’t even interested in a masterpiece, engaging or compelling, just something to soak up her attention and take her mind off of the myriad addictions she was fighting. Shimmer. Adrenaline. Lux.

Fuck, had they really only known each other for a few months? Half a semester? They spent so much time together, and every moment their affections seemed to grow deeper and deeper. They were in dangerous territory now, things might have been changing too quickly. She’d gone from ‘This preppy girl with a nice ass and pretty hair who annoys me.’ to ‘The girl I can’t stop thinking about who makes my heart leap with every smile’ in far too short a period.

Jinx had a habit of being impulsive. Was this too impulsive? Was it ever really going to work between them? The daughter of a rich and historic family with its roots in literal monarchy together with a nameless half-dead sump rat with a drug problem? Honestly, she had barely even reconciled with the fact that she had willingly entered into a romantic relationship. Something she’d told herself she would never do, something she thought she wouldn’t be capable of.

Eventually she decided on a documentary about some Noxian Basketball player she didn’t really have an interest in. It fit the bill of play, and with a name like “The Dunkmaster” she almost had to watch it. Only 10 minutes in and she found herself writing a text to Lux, only to stop herself right before sending it. Lux was trying to be responsible, and she didn’t need a distraction.

Blegh. Why’d she have to fall in love with a prep?

30 minutes later and the garage door hummed open from outside, and Vi walked into the kitchen.

“Hey.” She said, lifting a few heavy looking bags onto the counter. Jinx was pleased to see that regardless of Vi’s resistance, she was wearing her glasses. To her surprise though, she wasn’t wearing her usual tank top and athletic pants. Today, Vi was wearing a dark blue button up, the fabric stretching over her broad and muscular shoulders, tucked in tight to a pair of smart looking business slacks and with a nice leather belt. All bought by Caitlyn no doubt, Vi didn’t really have an eye for that sort of thing. Though, she was still wearing her combat boots, a pair very similar to Jinx’s own.

“What’s with the outfit? The buttons on your shirt look like they’re hanging on for dear life.”

Vi made a sound halfway between a laugh and a scoff, putting away groceries and tilting her head.

“Yeah I know, it doesn't feel right wearing it either. ‘Least I look hot. I had a job interview today.”

Jinx’s eyes went wide and she fully turned from the couch to face Vi.

“What? Where? Why didn’t you tell me?”

“It was sort of a last minute thing. Honestly, I didn’t even tell Caitlyn about it. There’s this artist opening a tattoo studio on Cogswalk Street. You know, that building right next to the ice cream place and that Ixtali mart? Someone mentioned it to me so I… may have stopped in to show the guy my designs.”

Jinx didn’t say anything at first, just leveled her gaze at Vi as thoughts ran through her head, their silence only broken by the sound of the documentary (currently interviewing the athlete's brother, who was also a famous sports commentator/wrestler or something. And also maybe a male porn star? At least that’s what Jinx recognized him from.)

Finally, Jinx spoke.

“What designs?”

Vi rubbed the back of her head with a sheepish glance to the side, before putting a finger up to gesture for ‘1 moment.’ Then she walked back to her car and came back with a sketchbook. She sat next to Jinx, and flipped it open. There on the pages, Jinx saw more than doodles or sketches or even what you might consider practice tattoos. Jinx saw a part of her sister she hadn’t seen before. One an intricate spider web that centered around a gear, similar to Vi’s ink. A wolf howling to a blood red moon. A skull with gemstone eyes biting down on a bleeding heart. Pages full of art, always strong and brutal and yet delicate.

For the first time in a while, Jinx found that she’d learned something earnestly new about her sister. They’d lived together for years now after they’d been taken from each other, and yet still Jinx had no idea.

“These are incredible.” Jinx said. “Where did you even learn this? Why haven’t you shown me before?”

“Stillwater.” Vi said, a bitter note in her voice. “That’s where I started at least. The girl who did my tats there showed me how to do it. What makes a good design. The importance of line weight. What to channel for your own work and how to interpret what other people want. I’ve actually been making my own designs ever since I got out but I’ve just… never bothered to do anything with them. Getting hired seemed like a pipe dream, you know? And, boxing makes way too good money to even think about switching. Not even Cait knows I do these. It was just for me.”

Again, Jinx fell silent as she took them all in, disbelief certainly clear on her face. She shook her head with a laugh again, amazed at it all.

“I can’t believe you’re such a good artist. You should have told me, we could have gone tagging together.”

“Yeah, I think Cait would kill me if I got a fine for vandalism.” Vi laughed. Jinx laughed too. Though, a thought still caught her.

“So, if you never planned on showing them to anyone, why did you decide to try and make it a career now?”

It was Vi’s turn to be silent, staring at the sketchbook for a while before looking up at the TV, now displaying highlights of layups and 3 pointers over narration. She sighed eventually, rubbing the bridge of her nose, crooked from being broken just a few too many times. Just like Jinx’s.

“You’re gonna call me a pussy if I tell you for real.”

“What?” Jinx laughed in disbelief. “No I won’t. Just tell me.”

Another sigh, then Vi closed her eyes and let her head fall back to rest on the couch.

“I’m getting too old to have some guy twice my weight beat the shit out of me every night. I’m supposed to be in my prime, you know, I’m still on the right side of 30. Just barely. Boxing is good money, and I’m damn good at it, but it’s starting to catch up to me. Aches I didn’t used to have, punches that I felt for a week after I’d stopped normally feeling ‘em. Getting these glasses made me realize that I haven’t taken care of myself for a long time now. And, I sort of need to start. Sooo… step one is to stop fighting people for a job.”

By choice Jinx had never gone to watch Vi fight. She knew Vi didn’t want her there, for one, and their reasons were probably the same. Jinx didn’t say it, and she didn’t show it, but she really wasn’t a fan of seeing Vi beat up and bloody when she came home. Seeing it in action would have only upset her more. The skin on the inside of arm twitched, and Jinx picked a bit at her track marks. She’d never been very good at taking care of herself either. The fact that Vi was starting at the same time put a hidden little smile on her face.

“You aren’t a pussy.” Jinx said, her grin twisting into a grimace. “Maybe when you found me again I would have said that. Maybe even a few months ago. But it’s not true, and I’m not the person I was then.”

Vi was silent for a while, eyes piercing but soft. Eventually she deposited the sketchbook onto the end table next to the couch and put her arm around Jinx. Jinx didn’t fight it.

“Growing up on the streets sure messes you up, huh?” Vi laughed with little humor. “Your worth is based on how tough you are. How strong you can be. How well you can protect and provide for your family. And you don’t even realize how fucked up that is until-”

“-You grow close to someone who isn’t.” Jinx cut in. Vi laughed for real this time.

“Yeah. I guess we both know how that feels now. How the hell did two little street rats like us both end up with hot rich girlfriends?”

“Don’t make a habit of calling my girlfriend hot in front of me, if you don’t mind.” Jinx chided with a gentle elbow to the ribs. Vi just laughed.

“I think it’s a good idea.” Jinx said, turning things back on track. “I mean, if you can get hired and it’ll make decent money why the fuck not, right? Like, hell yeah. My sister is a badass tattoo artist? Make you can use me as a test subject, I’ve been meaning to get some more.”

“Maybe.” Vi said, ruffling Jinx’s hair. “I’m gonna have to convince Caitlyn to get one too. I’m still not sure how to bring it up to her. I mean, she’d be thrilled, let's be honest, but I still need to find time to talk about it. And like, financial stuff. Boring stuff.”

“Well I hope you get the job.”

“Thanks. Uh, though if I’m honest money wise it might be a struggle at first. I doubt I’m gonna make nearly as much and Caitlyn already pays for a significant portion of the house. So just… I don’t know.”

Silence filled the air again, Jinx fidgeting her thumbs as Vi’s arm stayed around her, holding her close. Vi’s hold got just a little bit together as she spoke. Maybe it wasn’t even done consciously. There they were again, if just for a moment, sisters trying to survive alone against the world. Only, they weren’t alone anymore. And Vi didn’t have to be the one always being strong for Jinx.

“I mean… I could help out for a change.” Jinx said. Then before Vi could respond she spoke again. “Y’know just… with money now and then. I can find ways to rile up some cash. I usually spend it on myself but I could put some towards bills too. S’only fair.”

“Let’s just wait and see kiddo. Who knows? Maybe this guy loves my work so much that he hires me for crazy money. Me with no experience, and a criminal record, and no job experience besides fighting… We can hope.” Vi removed her hand and stood up from the couch, walking back towards the kitchen before Jinx even had a chance to complain about her getting up. “But uh- I appreciate it. A lot. I uh…” She sniffed, a little too hard. “I just wanted to say that I can tell you’re changing. In a good way. It’s been subtle but I can tell you’re growing up. I’m proud of you. I know shit isn’t easy.”

Ah. That’s why she wanted to be facing away from Jinx. Jinx forced away the tears that threatened her own eyes and spoke with an equally shaky tone.

“I haven’t exactly made things easy for you. Ever. But I’m trying. Trying to be better. I’m glad it’s noticeable at least. I’m- seeing the way Lux is with her family, the bitter and cold look when she talks about her parents… I don’t ever want that to happen to us. Not again.”

Jinx heard the audible sniffle this time, wet and obvious, and she knew Vi was trying her hardest to hold it together. She hated crying in front of others. Jinx wished there was some way that she could convince Vi to let it out, but old dogs can be stubborn when they get ideas in their heads. Instead of forcing it out, Jinx got up from the couch and went up to her sister, wrapping her arms around Vi from behind.

“I love you sis.”

Vi’s hands rested on her own, strong and firm, but always gentle and caring.

“I love you too Powder.” Then, for a moment Vi tensed, and she shook her head. “No, I’m sorry. I know you gave me permission to call you it but, you’re not Powder anymore, huh? I need to stop pretending you’re still the little kid who can’t do anything on your own. You’re Jinx. And you’re my sister. I love you too, Jinx.”

Well that really started the water works. Vi probably didn’t even realize just how important those words were at that moment. They stayed like that for a while, Jinx clinging to her like Vi might disappear again if she wasn’t careful, and the grip Vi held on her arms seemed similar. They mutually let go at some point, both wiping the tears that they hadn’t let fall from their eyes. Vi got them both a glass of water, and they returned to the couch.

She really was lucky to have her family after all the pain she’d caused, and the wrongs she’d done. For so long, Jinx had thought deep down that she would be truly and utterly alone in the end. That she’d ruin anything close to a community she would find, and she would be socially isolated until she finally bit her own bullet.

That wasn’t the case anymore. And a shard of iron lodged in her chest as she thought about Lux. Isolated lonely Lux. Not quite in the same way as Jinx, instead locked away by expectations and traditional values. When Jinx thought about that, she wanted so badly to remedy Lux, to fix something for a change instead of break. And what little chance she could have for it was coming soon.

“Hey Vi?”

Vi turned to her with a question in her brow.

“How do you leave a good impression on your partner’s family?”

Now surprise struck Vi, and she let out a long breath of air through puffed cheeks.

“That’s a tough one. I’m not sure if I’m the best example. Cait’s parents are still… rocky on our relationship. I mean they realize we’re together for good but her mom still doesn’t approve of me.”

That wasn’t very surprising. A poor-as-dirt Zaunite boxer was probably not very high on their bingo list for the next head of house.

“Well, can you tell me how to not make a fool of myself at least?”

“Why are you asking so suddenly?”

Jinx sighed, heavy.

“So… Lux got a letter from her family while we were on vacation. They’re like politicians or whatever. Basically, her parents are trying to make her come home to Demacia to study, and also they want her to get married to this Jarvan Lightshield guy who’s like the president's son? Or something? Prime minister maybe? I don’t know; I didn't pay enough attention. Anyway, her aunt Tianna also found out she and I are dating because some idiot snapped a picture of us kissing at the Gala. So know her aunt and brother are fucking flying to Piltover to meet with her and like, I don’t know, try to ungay her probably. And so next Tuesday we’re getting dinner. And I guess I have to make a good impression or else we’re cooked.”

“Wow.” Vi said, after a moment. “That’s a lot. I can give you pointers for sure, like always saying ‘yes ma’am’ and ‘no ma’am’ to her aunt but I’m not really the charismatic type.”

Jinx hummed, frustrated with the situation.

“Well, at the least her parents are homophobes. And, by extension, surely transphobes. And apparently her uncle? The husband of the aunt who’s going to be at the meeting? He’s the worst of the bunch. What if her aunt freaks out when she realizes that not only am I a woman, but I’m a transgender woman.”

“Hey.” Vi interrupted, wrapping her back into an embrace. “Whatever the case is, everything is gonna be okay. Lux doesn’t seem like the kind of girl who’s willing to go back into the closet now that she’s out. And, you should see the way she looks at you. Even if her family throws a fit, she’s not giving you up Jinx. She’s head over heels for you.”

Warmth rushed to Jinx’s cheeks, and she rubbed at her track marks again just so she had something to focus on that wasn’t her sister’s smug ass look.

“And clearly-” Vi said. “So are you.”

“Yeah yeah. I’m a fucking smitten kitten I know. I didn’t even think I could do romance after Ekko. So fucking eat it up, you were right, I fell in wuvvy wuv, blah blah blah.”

“I’m your big butch sister, kid. It’s my job to tease you.” Then Vi’s arm around Jinx suddenly grew tight, and her other hand was rubbing her knuckles into a brutal noogie on Jinx’s head.

“You bitch!” Jinx growled as she began to flail as Vi’s laughter filled the air. In moments they were wrestling like a pair of dogs, off the couch and bumping into the table as they tried to force the other down. Even if Vi hadn’t given her some new cosmic revelation on how to handle this family meeting, she’d given something Jinx. She sobbed herself to sleep later thinking about how happy she was that Vi was still part of her life.

--

Tuesday came far quicker than Jinx was ready for. They had agreed to meet for dinner at a Demacian restaurant in Piltover called Chez Silverwing that Caitlyn had recommended. Something about sending the right message, setting the tone for their meeting. Lux and Jinx were making an effort to make Tianna and Garen comfortable. Jinx sort of got it, when Silco had a meeting where he needed to lay down the law, he’d often take whatever subordinate out to their favorite food places. It was a show of respect, but also a show of power. We’re in your home field, because I’m more than comfortable playing away.

But reasonably, Jinx and Lux were not the duo with the power in this meeting. Sticking with their previous discussion, Jinx was heading into this fully sober, besides her normal antipsychotics and other boob related medication (not that it did much for her). And frankly, anxiety was doing a number on her already. They were off to a nice restaurant, which meant a large variety of Jinx’s wardrobe was off the table. Unless she wanted to wear the suit (she did not) her only real option was her red button up, one of Silco’s shirts that she’d taken shortly after he died. He was only 2 inches taller than Jinx, though you couldn’t tell with her hunch and his immaculate posture, so it fit her decently. They were both runts at the end of the day, thin and gangly. Honestly, if you’d looked at them together, you may have even mistaken them for biological father and daughter.

A pair of black jeans with less rips and tears than her others matched it, and an old ratty belt put the ensemble together. Of course, hardly anything could separate Jinx from her boots. Though, usually she tucked her jeans into her boots, these ones were boot cut. It wasn’t a bad look, Vi pretty much always wore boot cut, but she leaned far more into the blue collar clothes look than Jinx ever did. Even though Jinx was the engineer between them and Vi was the athlete.

At the least she thought she was vaguely presentable for rich assholes. And if she applied just a bit of eyeshadow to make her eyebags look less like eyebags because yeah maybe she wanted Lux’s family to like her, well that was her little secret. Thankfully even with her sleeves rolled up, her track marks wouldn’t show. And hopefully Garen and Tianna didn’t know pink eyes like her meant Shimmer overuse.

Lux had opted for a dress, something classy and respectful but still with a sensual touch. It was navy blue, which Lux wore a lot of, down to her mid thigh. A pair of long sleeves made to her wrists, though it was still shoulderless. Lux seemed to love showing off her shoulders, and Jinx would never complain about it. Though it had meant the night before she wasn’t allowed to bite where she wanted to, which she did complain about.

Lux did permit Jinx to smoke on the drive there, which she very much needed because her hands were trembling and she kept tapping her fingers on the steering wheel and even with the top few buttons undone her shirt felt like it was choking her. They had to park down the street from the place in front of a pharmacy, and when Jinx pulled the keys from the ignition, Lux reached over to put a hand on her wrist.

“You do look handsome, y’know.” She said, a weak smile covering her face. Jinx had the sense enough to see how rigid Lux looked, how stiff her movements were. She continued, “Don’t try and be someone you aren’t, okay? I don’t want them to think I’m dating someone they want me to date. I want them to know you .”

Jinx’s brow furrowed, and she suddenly found it hard to swallow, but she nodded. Maybe it was stupid to want the approval of her family, or, all Jinx really cared about in the long run was Lux’s brother. Garen was the only one that Lux smiled when she talked about. And Jinx knew just how important sibling bonds were.

“Yeah.” Jinx said, eventually. She put a hand on Lux’s knee, covered by a warm air of tights under the dress, and gave her a squeeze. “If you ever need to bail, or hide, or even just need me to keep them distracted for a few moments, just give me an elbow. I’m here for you, after all. It’s not supposed to be the other way ‘round.”

Lux chuckled lightly, and nodded as well. Her eyes closed and she took one big long breath in, and then a long breath out.

“Okay.” She said, “I’m ready. Let’s do this.”

The restaurant certainly looked the part, stark white and gold, the name plaque shaped like a diving raptor. Which objectively Jinx thought was kind of sick, because of course silverwing raptors were sick. All birds of prey were inherently badass. Garen and Tianna were already waiting, and as the server led them to their table, Jinx felt extremely out of place. All the people here were bonafide Pilties. Not just people from Piltover, because even some people in this city were working class, or came from blue collar work. People like Mr Wonderboy Jayce Talis. People who went to restaurants like this? Those were more people like Caitlyn, or Mel Medarda, or the kind of people who were at the Gala.

Although, objectively this was way better than the Gala. She wasn’t wracked by withdrawal today after all, and after this she knew her Shimmer hit was coming. God that would be nice.

Tianna and Garen Crownguard were both exactly and not at all what Jinx was expecting. 

For one, Garen Crownguard was a fucking giant. Jinx may have done some internet stalking just to know what she had in store for her, and she knew that this man was broad. But the photos online of him were always only bust shots, and his limited social media use was only to post his wargaming models that he painted. Seeing him up close, he was probably as tall as Jayce, 6’5” at least, maybe his shoulders were even more broad. His hair was short and brown, nice, but not in the way that a man who puts effort into his hair looks nice, more in the way of a guy who doesn’t like fashion. He was probably around Vi’s age, the same oceanic blue eyes as Lux, even the same eye shape, but his jaw was stocky. He was wearing a nice looking blazer, but she could see what seemed like a graphic tee peeking from beneath.

Tianna may have been just an inch or two shorter, easily taller than Caitlyn, and with broader shoulders as well. Her posture may as well have literally been held up by a wooden shaft, exactly ramrod 90 degrees from her chair. Her hair was blonde, like Lux’s but a bit more pallid with age. Less like shimmering sunlight and more like a void of platinum. You could probably cut jewels on her cheekbones, but the three of them had the same eyes. Similar to Garen she was wearing a blazer as well, the top of a smart black pantsuit, a white blouse beneath. She looked all the part of a military woman. If Jinx’s basic research was correct, she was a marshal in the Demacian Vanguard, not that they were doing much these days. Which like, any other time Jinx would have put every ounce of her being into annoying a stuck up soldier. Today wasn’t that day.

As the two turned to look at them, an icy shiver went down Jinx’s spine. Suddenly she felt like a wounded rabbit in front of a hungry bear, Tianna’s eyes looked through her in quick successive glances. She was pierced through in moments. Garen, thankfully, had a much softer look, smiling and standing up.

“Hey.” He said in a friendly voice as Lux was hugging him in moments. He was massive compared to her, and for a moment Jinx thought How the fuck are these two related? . Garen clearly seemed to know how anxious Lux was, giving her back a comforting pat before pulling away.

“Hey.” Lux replied, voice tight. How long had it been since they saw each other? Jinx wasn’t sure. “You look good. Are you slimming down?”

“Hardly.” He said, with a scoff. His voice was deep and rich, and if he raised it she suspected it would be booming. “My new gym partner’s got me doing cardio with her instead of just letting me lift. I hate it.”

Lux giggled. Garen turned to look at Jinx as Tianna stood.

“Garen, Aunt Tianna, this is Jinx. My… girlfriend.”

“What’s up?” Jinx said, evenly. Garen’s eyes weren’t so cold and piercing, yet still she felt like he could see straight through her.

“Jinx, huh? That’s an unusual name.” Garen said. Tianna remained silent.

“Well, y’know, picked it myself. Unusual name for an unusual gal, heh.”

Fuck. Could she be any more awkward? A curious but confused grin struck Garen, and he raised a hand out to shake. Jinx did, though his arm fucking dwarfed her.

“Fair enough.”

Tianna stepped forward now, still dwarfing both of them, giving Lux a firm nod instead of a hug in greeting.

“It’s nice to see you again, Luxanna.” 

“You as well, Auntie.” Lux made the gesture as well, suddenly even more rigid than she had been. The moment she replied, it was like Lux had turned back into the girl who tracked her down over a pencil outside of the science building. It wasn’t the same fear she felt towards her parents. It was something else.

Then Tianna turned her attention back to Jinx, which was enough to startle Jinx into standing straight.

“You’re certainly not what I was expecting.” She said, tone like a knife balanced on its edge.

That made Jinx raise her eyebrow.

“How so? M-Ma’am.”

Tianna seemed amused at the respect, but didn’t comment on it.

“Your hair. You have long braids in the picture.”

Oh. Right. Duh.

“Uh, yes ma’am. Yeah I decided to change things up a few weeks ago. Got tired of spending an hour cleaning my hair every shower.”

Tianna hummed, the kind of hum you gave someone to show them you were not impressed, but didn’t want to put the effort into politely saying so. This was going to go just as bad as Jinx expected. Garen seemed to glance nervously between the three of them, before reaching back to pull his chair out and sitting.

“Well, I’m starving. Dinner’s on me so, how about I get us a bottle of Chardonnay? Or, I could do with a Tuscan as well, if we’d rather a red. Break the ice a bit.”

Lux immediately sat as well, clearly thankful for the levity. Jinx waited until Tianna sat to do so, inching her chair as close to Lux as she could for a circular table.

“Whatever is fine with me.” Lux said. Which was interesting, because Jinx wasn’t aware she liked wine.

Garen looked to Tianna next, but by the stern look she responded with, it was very clear he wouldn’t be getting an answer. It appeared they weren’t coming into this with the same strategy. So he looked at Jinx next, and raised his eyebrows as a question.

“Uh… I don’t really drink wine. I mean, I will, but like I’m sort of a malt drinks and liquor girl.”

“Oh yeah?” Garen said. “What kind of liquor do they have around here? I’ve only ever been to this city once, when we moved Lux into her dorm.”

“Well, my old man liked bourbon best. There’s a distillery in the Promenade that’s his favorite.”

Garen gave her a quizzical look.

“The Promenade, huh? I’m not familiar, is that like a district?”

“Oh, yeah it’s the top of the fissures. Zaun, I mean. Sort of the melting point between it and Piltover.”

“Riight.” Garen said with a snap. “I forgot this city is sort of two cities melded together. Y’know, that’s genuinely fascinating to me. I-”

“Nephew, please.” Tianna said suddenly. Garen’s jaw snapped shut, and his brow furrowed. Tianna turned to address Lux, directly. Jinx could feel Lux shrink beside her. “This isn’t a social call. Frankly, the only reason we are here is to clean this mess up before it causes a catastrophe for our family. Luxanna, I am only going to ask you this once, and you are going to be honest with me, because I need to know what to expect. When you are recalled to study at home and fulfill your expectations in marrying Jarvan, how are you going to respond?”

A chill seemed to wash over the table, and as Jinx turned to look at Lux, she could see the pain and frustration welling up inside Lux. Right as she opened her mouth to answer, their waiter appeared.

“Good evening everyone, welcome to Chez Silverwing. How are you all doing?” A peppy young man with short curly brown hair spoke, hands clasped in front of him. At first silence was all that met him, before Garen replied, his tone far more firm than he had been a moment ago.

“We’re fine. We’ll need a minute to order but if we could have a bottle of whatever your best white is, that would be great. Thank you.”

The server suddenly seemed a bit nervous as he nodded, noticing the tension. When he was gone, all eyes turned back to Lux, whose jaw had set and her brow had furrowed. When Jinx reached to take Lux’s hand in hers, she was surprised when Lux pulled away. Though her eyes darted to Jinx for a second, appreciation there regardless.

“I…” Lux started struggling to get the words out. Finally she spoke, clearly and concisely. With a tone of utter assurance. “I don’t know.”

Jinx wasn’t sure what she expected Lux to say, but that certainly wasn’t it. The mere notion that Lux might comply with her parents demands sent a shot of betrayal into her stomach, and she was about to demand more from Lux, but Lux beat her to the punch.

“I don’t know how I’m going to reply. And, Auntie, I want your advice. Whatever happens, I refuse to let myself be married to someone I barely know, let alone a man Mom and Dad picked out for me for their own political gain. I-I love this city. I’ve made friends at the academy, and on my sports team, and I’ve met someone who I fell in love with. But…” She paused, and looked at Jinx properly. She smiled, sad but honest. Then she turned back to look at Tianna. “I need to find the best avenue to what I want. I want to live here on my own. Away from the Crownguard name. I want independence, I want to be who I am, I refuse to hide it. If that requires me making hard choices, I’m willing to make them. Even… even if I have to return home for a while to accomplish it. So please, can you help me?”

Now Jinx drew the line. Leaving Piltover? Leaving her? What the fuck was she talking about?

“Lux what the hell are you doing?” Jinx said, her tone way too harsh. She could practically feel the way Garen bristled at the shift. Lux met her gaze, and suddenly there was another change in Lux. Not only was she standing up proud to Tianna, Lux was challenging her directly. It was like the early days of their relationship, like their angry face off after the concert that had turned into their first night together.

Lux knew what she was doing, and she was begging Jinx to trust her. That didn’t stop Jinx from gritting her teeth, the panic at the idea of Lux being taken away driving her heart to pound.

Now she took Lux’s hand. Not reaching out for comfort like before, no this was possessive. This was fueled by fear. Lux didn’t stop her this time, a thumb gently running across Jinx’s knuckle. It was a private little promise to her, and Jinx had no choice but to believe it.

She turned her attention to Tianna, whose face had remained entirely passive through the whole speech. It was like looking at stone, not even a twitch or a sniff, besides the feeling that her eyes were peering into your soul.

Their poor waiter returned with their wine, asking if they were ready to order. Tianna said yes, with hardly a hint of emotion in her voice, and ordered some pasta Jinx had never heard of. Garen looked less than pleased, but ordered as well. Thankfully Lux asked for something which, to her understanding, was just fancy chicken parmesan. So Jinx just ordered the same thing, unfamiliar with Demacian cuisine.

When he hurried away like a field mouse, Tianna fixed her gaze purely on Lux. Then, something Jinx wasn’t expecting happened. Her brow softened.

“In the 21 years since you were born, Luxanna, I don’t think I’ve ever seen you speak that passionately. Never seen you stand up to someone in our family before. Never heard you respond to a demand from an elder with anything other than ‘Yes father’ or ‘Yes mother.’”

Lux’s mouth hung open, her brow matching Tianna’s. It was tough to see, but beneath all the bluster and cold anger that Tianna had opened with, there was a look in her eyes. A look that Jinx had seen before. Whatever her opinion of Lux was, whatever her feelings on her relationship with Jinx, that look was still present. A look she’d seen from Vander. From Silco.

Then, she looked pointedly at Jinx.

“My niece seems to care a great deal for you. She’s putting not just hers, but our families reputation at risk for it. Don’t take that for granted.”

“Yes ma’am.” Jinx said, immediately, because if she didn’t she thought Tianna might have shot her.

“Alright.” She said, pinching the bridge of her nose as if nursing a headache. “I suppose we should get started.”

Chapter Text

Lux

--

Eventually Lux had to step outside of the restaurant to collect her thoughts, the headache Tianna displayed seemed to have migrated onto her. A tension between her eyes and in her temples. It was only expected, their discussion had led to lots of debate about what their next steps were. Still, Lux took a long breath in and out, and it felt lighter than it had felt earlier in the day. 

Things were going… well. As well as they could have, for how impulsive she’d been. Well, no that wasn’t true. Lux had been debating how to approach Tianna since her and Caitlyn had spoken about it, and with it the idea of going back to Demacia. Not permanently, enough to get what she wanted. A year, maybe a few in the worst case. But she hadn’t told Jinx about it, because if she did there was a 100% chance Jinx would argue until the end of time that suggesting this action to Tianna was an awful idea.

And Jinx was intelligent, but Lux knew she wouldn't be objective in this situation. Maybe she couldn’t be. This wasn’t a game they could win by looking away from the hard choices that faced them. Not with the Crownguard family, not when Lux’s agency was at stake.

Lux knew full well that she’d regret this, but as she stood on the sidewalk outside of the building, Lux reached into her camera bag and pulled out Jinx’s cigarettes. Zaunite Specials, they were called. She didn’t even want to smoke, not really. It was probably a bad sign to her relationship with Jinx that this was going to be her chosen method of release at this moment.

But honestly, she was 21 going on 22, she’d only had weed once she hardly ever drank alcohol, Lux thought she was allowed to make a mistake now and then. And Jinx never looked more relaxed than when she closed her eyes and exhaled her first drag of a cigarette.

Logically, that was because Jinx was an addict. But Lux could pretend it would feel that good and then never have another one again. Her hands shook as she worked open the pack, pulling one of the few left out. Looking at the little eggshell cylinder with its orange tip, distantly Lux wondered if this was a bigger mistake than she thought?

Now wasn’t the time for that. She popped the filter between her lips and fished for Jinx’s trench lighter. No more time to really think about it, the lighter clicked and the flame met the end of her cigarette. How had Jinx always done this? She didn’t take it in right away, it had to smolder for a moment or two. Or, maybe that’s just how Jinx liked to do it?

That seemed like long enough. The smell was already striking, and Lux hated to say this smell had become a comfort to her. This was Jinx’s scent. Lux closed her eyes and inhaled deep.

Suddenly her throat was burning and then her lungs were burning, and Lux coughed like she’d never coughed before. Everything was dry and scratchy and raw and she would’ve traded anything for a glass of water. Jinx did this regularly? What the fuck?

When the last of the smoke had been properly expelled from her system, Lux pulled her phone up to text Jinx with one hand. She must have done something wrong.

//Lux: When someone smokes, do they just inhale it right from the cigarette?//

It took a moment, but Jinx replied.

//Jinx: I mean, you can Ig. I suck it into my mouth first slowly then inhale it from there, hold it two seconds, 4-5 if I want to enjoy the experience, and then blow it out. Inhaling it right away is kind of intense.//

//Jinx: Why?//

Lux put the phone away. Okay, sure, maybe she could try it again. Maybe it wouldn’t be so fucking awful if she did it the right way instead of like some kind of dolt. Everything still felt irritated, but she couldn’t exactly go back in for a sip of water with her lit cigarette.

She returned the cigarette to its perch and closed her eyes. Suck the smoke in first. Lux did so, and the smoke felt heavy in her mouth. Then inhale it. Niiice and slow. The image of Jinx filled her mind, laying with her and giving her the instructions directly. More like orders for her to obey. Oh, that sent a warmth through her as she slowly let the smoke ride down her throat. It still burned, but this time it was… muted. Subdued. It was nice. It was even heavier in her lungs. How did Jinx move around so freely while smoking? Lux followed the last command, holding as this tingling filled her mouth and her throat and the back of her skull. Then she blew, a long slow exhale that made a beautiful show in the evening Piltover air, drifting up towards the purple stars.

The warmth never went away though. Like the world suddenly felt the speed it should be. It felt good. Really good. Intense, different than what being high on Jinx’s blunt felt like. A sigh escaped her lips as she leaned back against the wall of the restaurant, pulling it up for another drag. Just as slow, just as burning, just as good. Fuck it was like everything became just a little floaty.

“Fuck.” She groaned, mostly to herself. That was another thing she’d been doing much more since she met Jinx. Swearing. If she’d ever said so much as damn around her parents, she would have gotten an earful about proper manners and how a young lady was meant to act. Fuck that. She was a young lady and she could do what she wanted. Jinx had shown her that, but Lux had grabbed it for herself, taken the reins and went full speed. Nothing could make Lux hide now.

Until, of course, she heard footsteps from the front of the building, and turned her head to see Garen rounding the corner, looking right at her.

With a cigarette between her lips.

“Oh- shit!” Lux squealed, looking for somewhere to hide her cigarette, as if it wasn’t completely obvious what she was doing. There was no point, by the look on Garen’s face he could see clearly. He looked surprised, but it was difficult to tell what was beneath that. Disappointment? Uncertainty? Those would be normal reactions to finding your innocent little sister with a cigarette in her mouth. Only she wasn’t the innocent little sister anymore. She hadn’t been for some time, well before she’d left for Piltover.

Garen smiled as he walked up beside her, leaning against the wall as well.

“Figured I should check on you.” He said, voice even. Ever the big brother, through this whole dinner he’d been the most level headed. Ever stoic. 

“I promise I’m not a smoker.” Lux said, immediately, desperation in her voice. “These are Jinx’s she smokes, I was just feeling super anxious and on edge and I needed some air and I really just wanted something to help my relax and-”

“Hey, hey. It’s okay. I believe you.” Garen said, putting a hand up. “Though, I can’t say it really puts me at ease knowing your partner is a smoker.”

She’s a lot more than that , Lux though, but figured better than actually saying it. No reason to give Garen a worse impression of Jinx.

“Should I put it out?” Lux asked. Which made her feel stupid immediately, like the little girl always chasing her big brother around the yard. Some things can’t change so easily.

Garen shrugged. “I’m not Mom.”

Lux held eye contact for a moment, before pulling it up to have another drag. Garen snorted, and Lux laughed too. It was ridiculous, this whole situation. That they were seeing each other for the first time in nearly a year, and it was for a strategy meeting .

“I missed you.” Lux said, and even she could hear how pathetic it sounded. “I love this city, but my first few semesters were really lonely.” Even when she had visited home for Winter Blessing break, the two of them had remained distant. Seeing how Jinx interacted with Vi, she was determined to shatter that wall and use the pieces to build a bridge. After all, her and Jinx had gotten an A on that project. 

“I’m sorry I haven’t visited.” He said. “Things have been… busy.”

Lux smiled.

“Not surprising. Being a bigshot businessman must be. How is it going?”

Garen grumbled at that. “You know I hate it. I’m not made for what Dad does. The numbers are easy for me, and I like my team but… I didn’t earn my spot as a leader. I just entered the company as one because I’m a Crownguard. It doesn’t feel right.”

“I get it.” Lux said. “I really do.”

He hummed in agreement, letting his head fall back against the wall. His hands were in his pockets for the cold, he hadn’t brought his coat with him, and she could tell his face was a bit pink. Garen wasn’t going to do anything about it though. He was too ‘manly’, he hated asking for help. Too proud.

“Are you still lonely?” He asked. “I mean, you have a boy-” Garen choked on the word immediately, and shook his head. “Girlfriend. Shit, sorry. Just not used to it yet. Promise that wasn’t intentional.”

“It’s okay.” Lux said. For a moment she thought he’d clocked Jinx, but she believed it was just an error of habit. After all he’d only known for a few weeks. “And no. I’m not. It’s not just Jinx, I have friends now too. Real friends, not just other rich girls I pretend to tolerate.” 

“I saw you posted something on Instagram the other day. You and a few other people? Those are your friends?”

Lux nodded, he was referring to a group selfie she’d taken of them at a bar in Tereshne, Jinx with an arm around her holding up a glass of whiskey, Seraphine pulling at the corners of her mouth to make ridiculous face while Scratch obviously held her drunk ass upright, Ekko and Ezreal leaning against a pool table behind where they had challenged some locals. It was her favorite photo of the bunch.

Well, her favorite photo she could show people. There were some other more incriminating photos taken in the bedroom that were very private.

“Thinking about it now, I should have figured you and Jinx were a couple. I just figured best friends or something.” He laughed as he said, and Lux laughed too. It was funny how different the world they came from felt now that her eyes had been opened. Felt like the allegory of the cave, she’d only recently realized the world wasn’t just shadows. Garen came from that same place too, and had been taught the same things she had.

“Uhm.” Lux stuttered. “Are you… y’know… okay with it? With me dating a woman?”

Garen turned to her with those big warm eyes of his when he entered ‘big brother mode’ and the nerdy jock disappeared.

“Lux, of course I’m okay with it. If Jinx makes you happy, I don’t care if she’s a woman, a man, or whatever. You’re a great person Lux, all that matters is that Jinx makes you happy, and helps you find a better version of yourself. That’s what relationships are. At least, I think.”

Lux smiled and had to fight the tears back for a moment. She’d been dreading Garen’s reaction for so long, that little inch of fear that told her he wouldn’t accept her if she were a lesbian. But hearing it from him, her sweet, stupid big brother. All the anxiety melted away.

“It’s only going to be women, so you know. But look at you, you sound like a poet.” She said, which had Garen laughing again.

“Fair enough. Now I know which flag to wave at pride. But, I didn’t come up with that, it’s just some advice I got from a friend about… you know. Something.”

Lux raised an eyebrow, practically smelling the juicy piece of info he wasn’t sharing.

“Something, huh? Not someone? This new gym partner?”

“We don’t have to talk about it.”

“Oh yes we do. You’re learning all about my love life, it’s only fair I get details on yours.”

Garen sighed, reaching a hand up to rub the back of his neck.

“Love life is overselling it. It’s a… crush. Nothing more than that. You know I’ve never been good with girls.”

“Well I happen to be an expert. Just tell me who she is at least?”

Garen rolled his eyes and sighed.

“Fine. You remember I mentioned this lawyer I knew a bit ago over the phone? Yeah, she’s this Lawyer from Noxus Prime. I guess her family is pretty important, her father’s a diplomat. I needed some legal advice, and she happened to be practicing in Demacia for a few years. Katarina is her name. At first it was just business, then we started getting lunch together because we take the same break hours, then we realized we worked out at the same gym and go together. So we see each other a lot. Every other day pretty much.”

Lux hummed, thinking back to all the time in the beginning she spent with Jinx because ‘it was just convenient.’ It was interesting to see Garen on the backfoot. He’d dated girls before, but very rarely did it last more than a few months, and they almost always asked him out. 

“What do you like about her?”

“She’s sharp.” He said, almost right away. “Incredibly intelligent. She doesn’t take shit from anyone. She’s scary and so beautiful at the same time. She’s good at her job and she knows it, I don’t think I’ve ever seen a lawyer grin at someone like a big cat who’d just cornered its prey. But she’s fun too. Sometimes a little too serious, but when we’re alone she laughs. And, she can be sensitive when she needs to be.”

Lux took one last drag of the cigarette, now only a butt and elbows Garen.

“Sounds to me like she’s closed off, but she’s open with you. For most people that amounts to a lot of trust. Why not go for it? What’s the worst that can happen?”

Garen groaned and let his head fall back to the wall again.

“I don’t know what to say. I mean, she’s special. Surely I should have something special to say, right?”

“No. Gods no, Garen. Just ask her to see a movie with you. Trust me, don’t make it a big long thing where you don’t tell her how you feel because you don’t want to mess up what you have, or it never feels like the right moment, and everything ends up like a soap opera. You never know when you could lose someone suddenly. What if tomorrow she tells you she leaves back for Noxus prime in a few days, and you never get to tell her?”

Garen hummed, giving her a look.

“When did you get so wise?”

Lux shook her head.

“I just learned from experience.”

That seemed to put a frown on Garen’s face. Not angry, or frustrated. More… thoughtful. After a moment he adjusted his blazer a bit, pulling at the collar of his t-shirt beneath and running a hand through his hair. He was fidgeting.

“Spit it out.” Lux said. “You want to say something.”

“Don’t… take this the wrong way. You’re an adult, and I don’t control you. I trust you to make your own choices. But Jinx. Does she treat you right? Is it… you know- healthy.”

Lux’s brow furrowed, and a defensive pit formed in her stomach.

“Why?” There was an edge to her tone now. Garen obviously noticed.

“It’s just… look, I came out here to find you smoking a cigarette. When you suggested coming home to Demacia she grabbed you, rough. I mean, without you at the table she was practically tweaking. Her eyes, the veins around them, you know it’s not that difficult to tell that someone is an addict. Let me go back to what I said before. Is she going to help you become a better version of yourself? Will you help her do the same?”

“You don’t know anything about it.” Lux said, harsher than intended. She might as well double down now. “Don’t judge her because of what’s happened to her. She’s lived a hard life here in Zaun, the kind of life you and I can barely understand. Growing up around violence and death and starvation, it’s not a sin that she came from poverty. She just cares about me, I didn’t tell her I was going to suggest moving home for a bit. She was just scared, that’s all. Things set her off easily, but she’s one of the kindest people I’ve ever met.”

“Okay, okay.” Garen said, putting his hand up as Lux’s volume continued to rise. She hadn’t realized it until he did so. Shit.

“S-Sorry.” She said, rubbing an arm.

“It’s okay. I’m sure you came to this dinner prepared to open with that to me and Tianna. You know her better than me, and if you truly believe that she’s good for you, then I support it. I just want to be sure that you’re safe. I trust your judgement, but you’re still young. Younger than me at least.”

Lux took a deep, slow breath in, and allowed herself to let that fear that clamped around her heart go. She looked at Garen, her older brother, the one person she knew would always be in her corner, no matter what.

“Jinx showed me that I can be free, Garen. That I can be Lux, not the daughter of the Crownguard family. She’d never intentionally do anything to hurt me. I love her. She’s been hurt by the world, and a lot of different people, and she deserves better. I want to be the person who takes care of her.”

Garen took a second, holding eye contact before nodding.

“Okay. Then I’ll do whatever I can to help you two. If you need me for anything, and I mean anything, don’t hesitate, okay?”

Lux smiled sadly, and pulled him in for a hug before he could argue. His arms felt like tree trunks compared to her, and Lux allowed herself to enjoy the comfort of her brother’s hug. She hated to admit it, but the more she allowed herself to be free, the scarier that the Crownguard name became. A force that would take away this life she loved. But it was wrong to pretend Garen was anything like them, anything more than her caring older brother. She could trust him.

When she pulled away, distantly Lux realized there was probably something she should tell Garen.

“Hey uh, about Jinx? It’s not super relevant and doesn’t change anything but, she’s transgender. Like, male to female, not female to male. I messed that up at the start actually.” Lux chuckled at the memory. “And she’s obviously out, being trans is pretty normal in Piltover and Zaun. It’s just a fact about her that you should know.”

“Oh. Huh.” Garen said. Then after a moment his eyes went wide. “Oh my gods, I-I swear that’s not why I almost said boyfriend, I had no idea!”

The desperation in his voice sent Lux into a laughing fit. They really were siblings. They stayed out there for a bit longer, Lux depositing her first (and hopefully only) Cigarette into the outdoor ashtray nearby. Right as they agreed to go back inside, Garen got her attention with an elbow nudge to her arm.

“Should I expect future nieces or nephews to still be on the table then?”

Lux punched him square in the bicep, which did very little, and had him laughing in a way only an older sibling can.

--

After nearly two hours of talking, a delicious entree, several rounds of bread and oil, and a souffle shared between her and Jinx, their dinner was adjourned. The plan was officially set.

It felt good to know what she was up against, know that no matter what happened things were going to be okay. And Jinx seemed to be very relieved as well, all the tension from before was practically gone. They were driving back to Jinx’s place. Vi was spending the night with Caitlyn, and they needed the space if they were going to get Jinx through her high.

As if on cue, she watched Jinx shiver. They were toeing the line for withdrawal symptoms doing her hit so late in the evening, but it wasn’t like they had a choice. Jinx had been clocked as an addict totally sober. If she had been high? Tianna likely would have demanded Jinx break up with her and come home.

Or… maybe not. She’d seen a new side to Tianna over dinner. The soft way she looked between Lux and Jinx. It put a suspicion into her head, one she intended to bring up directly before Tianna left town.

Lux’s train of thought was broken when Jinx spoke over the metal music playing at a low volume in the truck.

“You scared me pretty bad in there.”

Lux looked at her. Jinx kept her eyes on the road.

“The thing about going home without me. Spending time in Demacia or something. You scared me shitless. Was that a bluff?”

Nerves rumbled in Lux’s stomach, but she wouldn’t hide from Jinx.

“No. I meant it. I’d do whatever it takes to take my life back from my parents. If that means trading one year away from you for a potential lifetime at your side? Then I’ll do it.”

Jinx hummed, her fists tightening on the wheel.

“Coulda told me ahead of time.”

There it was.

“If I had, you’d have fought tooth and nail to not even suggest it, Jinx. I love you but I’m sorry, I know you.”

A bitter laugh left Jinx’s lips,  and Lux was starting to worry this was a deeper wound than intended. Lux reached a hand over to rest on her thigh. Jinx didn’t react.

“You trust me, don’t you?”

Jinx didn’t hesitate.

“Of course I do.”

“Then you know I’m not going to leave you, Jinx.” 

Silence. The anxiety started to grow more intense before Jinx replied.

“I know you don’t want to. You knew what you were doing in there, you made that clear enough with your eyes.” Another pause, another twitch of her fingers on the wheel. “But you could’ve talked it through with me ahead of time. I know I’m not stable. I know I spiral over nothing. I know I’m a fucked up broken person. But I don’t like having things like that sprung on me Lux. You’re willing to do whatever it takes for us, I get that. It makes me happy to know. But, do you think maybe I wouldn’t want a year long distance? That it’s not something I can do?”

Of course Lux knew Jinx wouldn’t love the idea, but she hadn’t considered it could be a deal breaker. Their relationship was still new, and it felt a bit childish to know you’d be with someone forever when you’d only known each other for a few months. But it did still feel that way.

“What are you saying?”

Jinx sighed through her nose, eyes drooping and posture lowering.

“Do you think I’m the kind of person who’d be good at long distance shit? Who knows what I’d fucking do, always laying around, being afraid you’ll realize it’s better without me. That you’ll find a girl who’s normal and healthy and better than me in every way. What if I became desperate for touch and affection and I… if I hurt you Lux? I’d never forgive myself. I get your logic, and I love that you’re willing to do hard things for me but… just… bring it up with me next time. Even if you know I’ll have a negative reaction, you know I’ll process it in my own time. Okay?”

She’d done it again, somehow, the same thing she’d done at the Gala. Didn’t consider Jinx’s feelings, saw her like the rest of the world did and not as someone who’s so deeply scared. Lux hated herself for it, just for a moment, and made another promise not to do it again. She probably would, and Jinx would hurt her too. But that’s how life was. They’d talk, they’d forgive, they’d keep going. The thought put her at ease. So she forgave herself for it, and leaned over to kiss Jinx on the shoulder.

“I’m sorry, I was feeling desperate, and I was afraid of how you’d react. That wasn’t right of me. I’ll tell you next time.”

Jinx nodded, leaning her head over to rest on Lux’s. God Lux loved this bench seat. She could cuddle up to Jinx whenever she wanted when they drove.

“Okay. I forgive you. Love you, blondie.”

“I love you too.”

Silence filled the air, and Lux was more than content to focus on Jinx’s warmth until they got home. Jinx seemed to have other plans.

“Hey, why’d you text me about my cigs?”

Oh.

Right.

Shit.

Her silence was enough of an answer apparently.

“Don’t tell me…”

Lux sighed, and nodded. She was ashamed of doing it, but it felt so good. And fuck it had left her so horny because it smelled just like Jinx’s hoodie. (Which lived in her dorm these days unless she was giving it to Jinx for a “recharge.” It was also a frequent masturbation aid when she and Jinx spent a few days apart.)

“Look, I’d be a hypocrite to tell you not to smoke, but please don’t make it a habit. I do this shit because I’m waaay too addicted to stop now, and it’s… reasonably safer than heavy drugs and shit. Zaunite cigarettes are comparatively much better than others, they’ve done a lot of science into mitigating second hand smoking, which is the only reason I’m comfortable doing it around you.”

“I promise.” Lux said, feeling a little giddy that Jinx considered not smoking around her if it wasn’t safe. Which, probably wasn’t a good sign. The bar is 6 feet underground.

“I mean…” Jinx said, tiling her head. “D-do you want me to stop smoking? I promise, these probably aren’t as bad as the ones you see in Demacia are. That shit’ll fuck you up. But, that doesn’t mean you should start. To be clear.”

It was strange, not that long ago Lux had found Jinx in her truck on a lazy morning, and had wished she could help take away her addictions. She’d actually manage to start with one, and now she was faced with the other. Logically it wasn’t good for Jinx, even if Zaunite cigarettes were ‘safer’ or not. And logically the right thing to do was help Jinx break this one too.

But Lux was getting just a little tired of having to logically do the right thing, recently. She wanted to be young and dumb now and then, and there was a deep dark selfish secret sitting in her.

“Can I be honest?” Lux asked.

Jinx looked confused, but nodded. Lux took a deep breath and admitted the truth.

“I don’t want you to stop. I think I might have developed a kink for you smoking.”

That shot Jinx’s eyebrow up, and her eyes darted to Lux before focusing back on the road again. She did it twice more before adjusting in her seat. Fuck, was she that turned on by the idea? That only made Lux worse.

“You uh…” Jinx cleared her throat. “That’s really not something I thought I’d hear you say.”

“It’s not something I expected to say either. But, through my smoke outside? The smell just made me think of your hoodie, and the way you smell, and I couldn’t stop thinking about the way I love when that feeling surrounds me, like I’m drowning in you. It sort of got ruined because Garen showed up to talk with me but, I think if I’d been left there with that whole Cigarette to myself and nothing else, I would’ve needed to hide in the bathroom for a bit.”

“Fuck.” Jinx breathed out, adjusting again. Lux was feeling it too, a distinct feeling between her legs. This was bad, they still had at least 20 minutes of city traffic before they got back to the house. “God fuck me that’s so hot.” Jinx continued. Lux giggled, noticing that her own breath was becoming heavier. But fuck, she just wanted to give in to it at this point.

“Yeah, trust me I know. It’s probably not good, right? I mean, I should help you to quit, but I don’t want you to. It’s… I don’t know. Don’t take this the wrong way but you being the kind of person my parents would describe as a ‘dirtbag’ really gets me going. Like, recently I started having this fantasy of you holding me in your lap, and you take a drag of a blunt or a cigarette, then you kiss me and b-blow the smoke into my mouth. I think it’s called-”

“Shotgunning, yeah.” Jinx interrupted, flipping her turn signal for a street that they were not supposed to go down. “I’ve done it once. With uh, Marcie, one of her friends, and some fuckboy. It’s pretty good. I bet it’s better when you don’t hate everyone in the group sex.”

“Yeah.” Lux half laughed, half moaned, closing her eyes and imagining herself and Jinx with Marcie between them while Jinx smoked.

Fuck.

Oh fuck.

“Jinx, I’m gonna explode at this rate.”

“Yeah. Me too.” Jinx husked, making another turn Lux didn’t understand. They were going down city backstreets now, away from the busy main roads heading down to Zaun. One hand left the wheel, and slowly, so slowly, rested onto Lux’s bare thigh. Lux whimpered at the touch. Jinx grinned. “No reason to deny yourself, right?”

“Huh?” 

Jinx licked her lips and cleared her throat again.

“You can touch yourself. If you want. You take longer than I do, so why don’t we get you started?”

Oh.

Oh gods. Lux understood now.

“Okay.” Lux obeyed, pulling the hem of her dress up further, spreading her legs. One hand took Jinx’s hand, and the other slipped up her inner thigh, pushing her soaked panties aside and running one finger over her slit.

“Fuck, Jinx.” Lux moaned, which made Jinx’s fist white knuckle on the wheel.

“I’m literally about to fucking burst through my jeans here, shit.” Jinx mumbled, almost to herself. Lux giggled, leaning her head down onto Jinx's shoulder again as she found her clit and made sharp little circles there.

“Yeah, I’m soaking the leather of your seats. Sorry, I know you like keeping Vyx clean.”

“Blondie, this is exactly what Vyx is for. She’s the sexiest pickup that’s ever been. If anything, I can’t believe we haven’t had sex in here yet.”

Lux giggled, turning into a moan as she sped up. Fuck, it wasn’t gonna take long, and obviously Jinx intended to join her when they reached whatever destination. Consciously she slowed down, not letting herself give in until Jinx could join. That would make it so much better.

Jinx seemed to pick up on it, pressing a kiss to the crown of Lux’s head.

“Almost there baby, almost there. Then I’ll take such good care of you.”

“Yeah. Yeah.” Lux begged. An idea suddenly struck her, and she sat up. Jinx seemed to mourn the contact, but when she realized Lux was reaching down to her bag, she shut up. Lux (who did her best to wipe her hand on a tissue before working through the rest of the bag) pulled out Jinx’s cigarettes and her lighter. With a smooth motion she pulled one up and held it up to Jinx’s mouth.

Jinx looked at it for a moment, then at Lux, then took it between her lips. Lux flicked the lighter and set the tip ablaze, tossing the lighter and the pack to the other side of the bench with little care. She went right back to touching herself, with her left now, her right hand gripping hard into the leather seats.

“You’re so incredible.” Jinx laughed while smoke poured from her lips, holding the cigarette between two fingers. “I think you were made for me, Blondie. I feel bad, I can’t help but treat you like my personal sex thing.”

“Feeling’s mutual.” Lux whimpered. “I have such a bad boy kink, you’re perfect for me. So fucking hot. Gods that first day of class we had, when I went to bed that night I masturbated to you.”

“Shit, really?” She mumbled through her smoke.

“Yeah. The first time I saw you my stomach flipped. I couldn’t take my eyes off you. I didn’t even know how attracted to you I was. I thought I was annoyed by you.”

“Fuck that’s so hot. When we met at the bar that night the whole time we were talking, I was imagining bending you over one of the tables. Calling you an innocent little church girl. Hoping you’d like it if I corrupted you.”

“Oh my god, fuck Jinx I can’t wait anymore.”

“Ok, ok we’re here babe.”

Jinx was pulling into an empty little alley road, pulling over and parking against a sidewalk that looked like it hadn’t been serviced for 30 years. She ripped her seatbelt off and began fumbling with her belt, the smell of cigarette smoke quickly filling the car. It only made Lux so much needier.

Jinx yanked her jeans and boxers down to her knees in one movement, her erect and weeping cock flicking into the air. Lux also removed her seatbelt, pulling her dress up to bunch at her hips. She began fighting with her panties to pull them off, but she was having trouble with how bad her hands were shaking. Jinx touched a wrist to stop her.

“How much do you like those panties?”

They were plain, and white, and frankly a little old.

“Not very much.”

Jinx nodded, reached down to the holding space on her door, and removed a switchblade.

Oh. Oh gods.

It flicked open, and Jinx reached down to carefully slide it between Lux’s skin and the panties, a practiced and steady hand despite her jitters. Jinx was always better with the pressure of the moment rather than static nerves. In one swift motion she cut through, and tossed the ruined panties to the ground.

“Holy shit.” Lux sighed. Jinx laughed, closed the blade up and dropped it back to where it belonged. 

They were on each other in moments, Jinx’s right hand reaching down to press into Lux’s pussy while Lux threaded her arm under and wrapped her fingers around Jinx’s length.

“Shit.” Jinx growled, cigarette nearly gone but still hanging loosely from her lips. It was all around them now, Lux really was drowning in Jinx, just like she wanted. She cried as Jinx pushed two fingers inside for just a moment, before moving back to Lux’s clit.

“You’re a fucking ocean down there.” Jinx laughed, and the cruel note in her town made Lux clench . 

“Yeah.” She whimpered. “You're burning up too. Fuck I want you in me. In my mouth.”

“Later.” Jinx ordered. “Just hands for now.”

Lux nodded, using her thumb to spread Jinx’s precum and give her a bit of lubrication. It wasn’t enough, and she quickly put two fingers in her mouth for more, giving her what she needed. Her strokes were sloppy and uneven, but Jinx’s bucked into her hand like she was in the peak of pleasure.

“Fuck me, oh fuck Lux, shit!” She growled, which only made Lux creeping ever closer.

“I’m so close.” She whispered. “So close, so close, Jinx!”

Suddenly, Jinx’s free hand was grabbing Lux by the jaw, and yanking her to face Jinx. The cigarette was gone, deposited down onto the ashtray.

Oh gods, was she going to…?

In answer Jinx kissed her full on, and it only took a second for her to realize they were sharing smoke. The warm sensation filled her as she inhaled as slowly as she could.

Lux came with a muffled cry into Jinx’s mouth. The kiss continued as Jinx came as well, cum covering Lux’s fist as she jerked her off.

It was heaven, everything she’d been wanting, it was like they had devolved into animals who only needed this one thing, this one desperate urge. It was perfect, it was dirty, it was so so satisfying.

Finally Jinx pulled away and she slumped back against the leather seat, panting for air. Lux followed her lead, leaning her whole weight into Jinx’s shoulder.

“Holy shit.” Jinx laughed. Lux laughed too. They looked at each other, and Lux realized for the thousandth time that she loved Jinx to her core, and prayed for one thousand more.

Then, feeling devious, Lux  moved the hand that had been touching Jinx to her mouth, and slowly cleaned the cum with her tongue. When she was done, she laid herself belly first across the bench, and did the same wherever it had landed on Jinx’s body.

A blowjob, a finger fucking, and an awkward ride on the bench later, they were headed home. Jinx’s shimmer hit went easy, and they were cuddling to sleep in Jinx’s bed. This was the life she wanted, the life she’d give anything for. A life where could be herself. A life with her Jinx.

Chapter Text

Jinx

--

After the dinner with the Crownguards, time seemed to go faster and faster, pushing through the life changing fall semester with a breakneck pace. Her and Lux had completed another project for Victor’s class, earning just as strong of a grade as the first time. And, actually? Jinx’s grades were starting to improve on a wide scale. Now that their relationship had been cemented a bit firmer, more often were the nights when Lux would allow Jinx to come to her dorm, but insist she’d need to spend 2 to 3 hours minimum studying and doing homework. Usually Jinx spent this time fucking around, watching videos, or playing games, but out of a need for break in routine she had actually begun studying as well. The thing was, Jinx had always had a natural talent for math and science, she was just so hopelessly fucked up that she hated doing the work. Doing around Lux though, wasn’t so bad. Sometimes she was the one being interrupted by Lux with a sudden need for sex. Talk about a confidence boost.

That said in the span of her life, Jinx had actually grown kinda used to sudden upheavals. It was a sudden upheaval when her Mom and Dad died, when Vander had died, when Vi came back to her life. Jinx had decided that, actually, sudden upheaval was just better than waiting anxiously for the reckoning.

What they had decided at dinner was that when the semester ended, Lux would fly back home to Demacia. She would be refusing her parent’s request for her to study in Demacia, and refusing to marry who they wanted her to. Whatever consequences came with that would just have to be dealt with after the hammer fell, since no one was exactly sure how the Mr. and Mrs. would react.

Oh, and yeah, Jinx was going with her.

Which was both amazing and absolutely stupid. Lux’s justification to her parents was that her friend from the academy wasn’t able to go home for Yule, and so Lux had invited her to spend winter break with the Crownguards. If they suspected Lux knew about their intention to forbid her from returning from Piltover, things would have to be different, and so pretense was required.

The concept of flying out of town to spend a month of winter with Lux was a good one. The reality that she would have to be there when the bombs fell was what terrified her. Lux was going all out, which meant coming out to Pieter and Augatha with Jinx present. Jinx had to, from an empathetic standpoint, understand that being a rich and upstanding family and sending your daughter to a foreign city for college, only for her to come back a lesbian and dating the picture woman for Shimmer Anonymous would likely be shocking.

Which was also something that Lux had practically ordered Jinx to do. Support group. 

“You okay, Jinx? You seem a little distracted.”

And it just happened to be her present location as all of these thoughts were racing through her mind.

Her head snapped up from the table, where donuts and other refreshments had been set up. Bruno, the leadership for this group, was next to her. He was a nice enough guy, in Jinx’s opinion. She’d totally expected to be condescended on and lectured about finding Janna or some other god. But no, she had nothing but good things to say about the shark vastaya. He was thin and lanky, more humanoid than shark except for the gills that dotted his neck, sharp teeth on an otherwise warm smile, and the shark tail that poked out from beneath his red and black flannel. He was bald, but tattoos littered most of his exposed skin, scalp included. Jinx recognized more than one of them as prison tattoos, but it never diminished his welcoming presence. It made her think back to her childhood with Silco. She had always wanted to be a shark vastaya because Silco loved aquatic life. And sharks were objectively the coolest sea animal. That’s what gave her the idea for fishbones.

This was a weekly group that Jinx had, initially, absolutely fucking refused to consider when Lux prompted her. Of course, Lux insisted it would be good for Lux, and Jinx insisted that it would be bullshit and just make her upset. But, Janna forbid, you can only say no to that beautiful star for so long. Maybe she shouldn’t bring up Janna like that in one of her temples.

“Sorry, just zoning out a bit.” The meeting hadn’t started yet, the other sad souls mumbled and mingled amongst themselves in the chapel.

Bruno craned his neck to scan the slow growing crowd. “I can’t help but notice Lux isn’t here with you today.”

“Yeah, she had a photo-shoot to do tonight for school. I know she wanted to come.” Jinx picked up a cream filled donut to deposit on her little styrofoam plate, and flicked a button for the 3 decade old coffee maker on one end to begin pouring. If she got nothing else out of this, she would appreciate fresh coffee and treats.

“Sounds exciting.” Bruno said with a nod. “I don’t mean to pry just, for the last three meetings she’s been pretty much attached to your hip.”

Jinx laughed. That was basically true.

“She’s the one who made me come in the first place. When I heard she was busy I was gonna bail. She pretty much threatened to put me in the proverbial doghouse if I didn’t. No offense, it's just… you know…”

He raised his hands up and chuckled. “Hey, I get it. I can’t imagine for a young buck like you, spending your Tuesday evening in temple with strangers is fun.”

No. No it really wasn’t. But she liked Bruno a lot, and it made Lux happy so… Such is life. She just shrugged and went to take her seat. It was coffee and donut time, and nothing should interrupt that.

Well, she wished nothing would interrupt that. Her wish fell upon deaf ears, as right when Bruno was sitting down in the circle of folding metal chairs to start the meeting, another person walked in the room.

Almond skin and pretty hazel eyes, perfectly cared for dark curly hair falling to her shoulders, a septum ring that she only wore when she wasn’t at school. A yellow designer top hidden beneath a black hoodie that had once belonged to Jinx (that’s where it went!) and a pair of tight jeans that hugged shapely hips that Jinx couldn’t help but look at for a moment too long.

Marcie.

She was barely two steps into the room before her eyes landed on Jinx, and she froze. First confusion hit her, then immediate anger, then she was turning to exit the door before it closed. Only she reversed into the room proper as an exhausted middle aged couple entered, holding hands. The door closed behind them, and Marcie was trapped (by the social convention of obviously leaving a narcotics abuse support group in front of everyone).

Jinx got it. She would’ve tried the same move.

Marcie huffed at nothing and took a seat on the opposite end of the ring to Jinx, crossing her arms and looking anywhere but at her.

Fuckin’ Marcie.

“Evenin’ everyone, nice to see so many of you today. Well, you know what I mean.” Bruno began, crossing a leg up. “I see just a few new faces so, why don’t we start with some introductions while we pass around the sign-in sheet?”

The few newcomers spoke, one after the other, with Bruno pointing out a returning member now and then with an anecdote or point so as to naturally break the ice. When it finally got to Marcie's turn she looked like she wanted to burn the place down.

“I’m Marchesa. I’m a student at the academy. Studying toxicology. Fuckin ironically.”

She was? Jinx didn’t know that. She thought Marcie was studying to be a beautician.

“Nice to meet you Marchesa. Jinx over there actually studies at the academy as well. Engineering, right?”

Jinx didn’t move. Marcie sighed.

“We know each other.” She drawled.

It would have been literally impossible for anybody present to not notice the absolute fucking disdain with which she said those words, but Bruno was a champ about it. He smiled and quickly directed the conversation away.

“Toxicology must be interesting. Actually, I’ve heard that before people became users, the consequences of narcotic use were often not properly conceptualized. They knew from a wider and more sciency angle what addiction did. But they didn’t know the smaller day-to-day realities. I’m always itchy in this one spot forever. I have a permanent headache that never goes away. It’s important that when we look at our own lives, and our own journeys, we-”

The whole time Bruno spoke, it felt like Marcie’s eyes were burning a hole into Jinx’s spine, which really did not make for a comfortable space. Her fingers twitched, and she could feel withdrawal sweats coming on. Even with the taper over the last month or so since Tereshni, Jinx could feel the way her body was frustrated it wasn’t getting enough.

Eventually Bruno finished his time, and opened the floor up for anything the group members wanted to share. This was the worst part really. It felt shitty to say so but hearing how other people had suffered from Shimmer? Listening to them empty their hearts on all the things they’d done? The people they’d hurt? Jinx was guilty of enabling that for so many. She had spent years in the business of dealing. She had hooked more than a few people on Shimmer.

In fact, one of them was sitting just across from her.

Bruno seemed to have a good eye for this sort of thing, because he pulled her out of her own head.

“Jinx, you’re unusually quiet. Usually you have a quip or two to add. Something on your mind?”

Another day, Jinx would’ve dodged the question with a joke or something witty and found a way to move on. But today she was alone, and surprisingly raw from Marcie’s presence. She acted like it didn’t weigh on her, how she and Marcie blew up, but it did. She still believed Marcie was 100% in the wrong but, it’s not like she wanted to watch the girl spiral into a wreck.

“Not anything good, I think.” Jinx admitted. Bruno just smiled.

“We’re not here to judge you. It’s okay to say what you’re feeling.”

She signed internally. No getting out of this it seemed.

“Just… it’s so fucked up that there are people out there who have stories like everyone here, about how shimmer fucked them up, except I’m the bad guy. I’m the one who gave them their first hit, or got them back on the horse after a year clean. Like- the fuck? Why am I even allowed to be here? Why am I allowed to try and get better when I’ve ruined their lives?”

There was a pregnant pause in the room. Jinx did her best not to look at Marcie.

“So, you were a dealer then?”

Jinx nodded, shame red hot on her cheeks.

“Do you think that makes you any less of an addict?”

All she could do was shrug. Bruno shifted in place and smiled that stupid friendly smile.

“Everyone deserves the chance to better themselves, especially when they believe they don’t. What matters is we accept what we have control of, and what we don’t have control of. You’ve lost some of it, all of us have. You are the only thing in life you can control, and part of that has been taken. But not all of it. What I want you to do, Jinx, and what everyone should do when they leave today, is to think about what actions you can take. You can’t erase the pain you’ve already caused to others, but you can do your best not to hurt anyone else, and you can work to help those who are hurting. That includes yourself.”

If Jinx wiped away a few stray tears when they moved on from the topic, no one seemed to bring it up.

--

The meeting ended a little early on account of Bruno having to pick up his son from sports practice, and according to her phone the bus back to campus wouldn’t show up for another 20 minutes. So Jinx waited outside the Temple of Janna and smoked a cigarette against one of its old brick and mortar walls. They were well into the end of autumn now, with winter just around the corner the nights in the city got cold. She was thankful again that she had inherited Silco’s leather jacket, as it and her cigarette were doing wonders for her.

The sound of pump boots scraping on pavement pulled Jinx’s attention, right as Marcie turned the corner and approached.

Wonderful.

Wordlessly, she took a spot next to Jinx, and held a hand out expectantly. Jinx was tempted to give her a high five just to piss her off, but she pulled the cigarette from her lips and passed it to Marcie.

She heard the deep inhale and satisfying exhale of the drag, and it came right back to her. The tip was stained with lipstick now. Who wore lipstick to Shimmer Anonymous? Without looking up from her phone, Jinx spoke.

“So. You and Lux have that talk yet?”

Marcie quirked an eyebrow.

“She told you about that?”

“She tells me everything, dude. That’s not a girl who knows how to keep secrets.”

“Ass. No, we haven’t. It’s kinda hard to find the time when she spends all her time fucking you or doing homework.”

Jinx smiled. That was her girl alright. They shared another pass of smoke between them.

“Can I guess what it was about?”

The sound Marcie made was fully indignant.

“You know exactly what it’s about. The fact that you’re making a victim out of another naive girl.”

Jinx’s fist clenched and she laughed in disbelief.

“Come the fuck on Em. Look, I admit, and in fact I admitted it in front of the whole group, I got you hooked on shimmer. My fault, and I promise you I feel more guilty than you could know. But we fucked around, and you caught feels, and it hurt, but you cannot blame me for that. I told you right from the start what was up.”

“No, you fucking didn’t!” Marcie turned to face Jinx now, hands in fists at her sides and anger in her face. “You said that you didn’t really like long term shit, and so I thought it was gonna be a one time thing. But then, we kept going. We kept smoking, and we kept doping, and you kept fucking me. How else was I supposed to take it? The rest of the girls? You never spent more than one night with them. Why the fuck was it so wrong to think I was special? But no, no you just wanted me to think I was special so you had an easy pussy to wrap your dick in.”

Now Jinx pushed off the wall and met Marcie, face to face, even as Marcie had a few inches on her.

“That is not at all what happened! I kept fucking you because yeah, I did like spending time with you. You were fun! And you were funny! But I told you right from the start I don’t do romance, and I don’t do exclusivity. It’s not my fault you deluded yourself! And do you know what? It fucking hurt like hell for me too. Know how many friends I have? I’ll give you a hint, it’s below double digits. You were the only friend I had in the academy, and when I decided I couldn’t have sex with you anymore, you lied to everyone about it. You threw me under the bus for it! You had all your friends, I was alone! I’ve been alone until Lux!”

Marcie suddenly turned heel, and Jinx thought she was just leaving the conversation completely. That is until she watched Marcie kick a nearby tin can that had been littered, and half scream half growl so hard Jinx was afraid her voice was shot.

Then, Marcie walked back over, and slumped against the wall, sliding to the ground.

Yeah. That was a good idea. Jinx followed suit.

They were silent for a while, but the cigarette kept going between them until it was just a crumbled little filter left. Jinx stubbed it out on the ground, and took a breath.

“I… I am sorry I hurt your feelings. I didn’t mean to, I just wanted to be around you. But I just… break things around me. I can’t help it. I’m a Jinx.”

Marcie didn’t break her vigil right away, but she made no effort to leave. After a minute, she sighed.

“I’m sorry I told everyone you cheated on me. I thought you did. It felt like cheating. I guess I just wanted it to be cheating.”

There really wasn’t anything else to say. The relationship had already been shattered. Whether or not they could put back the pieces hardly mattered at this point. At least, after a long time, the pieces lined up on the ground.

“Why’d you come here?” Marcie asked. “I know your ass is deeper in Shimmer than anyone I know.”

Jinx grimaced.

“Same as you, I guess. Same as everyone else. I wanna quit.”

“For real?”

“Yeah. For real.”

“And… Lux didn’t force you to go under threat of no more pussy?”

Jinx laughed. That sort of is what happened. But, she really did want to quit. Deep down she wanted to be here.

“She may have given me a push but, I’m here. Oh uh… about Lux. She and I are dating.”

The side eye Marcie gave was criminal.

“Pardon?”

“Yeah. We’re uh. We’re like exclusive and shit. Been dating for just about a month now. Sleeping together for about 3. We made it official right before autumn break.”

“Mhm. So, what was all that about not doing romance that we just dug up?”

Fair point.

“Yeah. Sorry. At the time, you know, I was still working through Silco’s death and, none of the sex I was having was healthy. I guess it’s like… I needed the right person. I really thought romance was bullshit until I met her. Now it’s like my heart can barely handle it, any moment I feel like it’s gonna shoot out of my chest like a mortar and go BOOOM across the skyline.”

Marcie scoffed.

“So what, I wasn’t the right person?”

Jinx cringed.

“Well… yeah. I guess so. I’m sorry.”

Internally she prepared herself for another tirade of “you fucking predator” and “shitty slutty bitch” or whatever else Marcie could come up with. Instead she shook her head.

“Shit. Can’t believe I’m gonna have to apologize to that blonde bitch.”

Jinx laughed, right as the lights for the campus bus illuminated them both. Neither of them really spoke for the ride home, and sat on opposite benches so as not to encroach on the other’s space. However, right before they got off, Marcie peeled the old hoodie off and forced it into Jinx’s arms. Jinx didn’t say anything, just stuffed it in her backpack. When they made it back inside the dorm, at the elevator Marcie turned to her.

“Guess I’ll see you at group next week.”

Jinx smiled.

“Yeah. Guess you will.”

--

Another month came and passed, and final exams were at their doorstep. The Jinx-Lux households had become a no sex zone for the last few days before their doom, and Jinx was feeling it. There was nothing to really be done, though just to drop her nose to the grinder and finish all her projects. In the end though, Jinx was still more scared of the Demacia trip than finals. 

On the last day of exams, their friend group had agreed to meet up at Yoshinae Ramen to celebrate the end of the semester (and a new single for the Firelights). Of course, being the primary authentic ramen shop just a few blocks away from the largest college in Piltover, it was quite busy. By Janna though, the food was incredible. Lux had taken her here once before after Caitlyn had introduced her, and now whenever they came its old proprietary would smile and point at her Volleyball jacket to the sponsor poster they had on the wall.

“Oh, I think I could marry this bowl.” Serpahine swooned, slurping up another helping of noodle and bean sprout.

“I think Scratch would probably take issue with that.” Ezreal said, currently focused on his own fresh order of gyoza.

Seraphine finished her bite and made a mischievous smile. “No, Scratch would probably be more into me if I was married. Especially if I had some rich old husband who wasn’t properly attending to me. Then, she’d come in like a prince and whisk me away, and she’d take me in his bedroom, and-”

Ekko put his chopsticks down. “Can you please wait to have a sex fantasy until after I’m finished with my meal.”

That made Lux laugh so hard ramen broth almost came out of her nose, which took a good 5 minutes in the bathroom with Jinx rubbing her back to rectify.

“So.” Seraphine picked up once they were all pretty much done. “How did everyone think their finals went?”

“Not bad at all.” Lux said. “Jinx and I spent nearly a whole week just studying beforehand. My hardest was sociology. It’s like… It’s hard to care about a final when you intend to switch majors next semester.”

“Which I still think is crazy.” Ez cut it. “You’d be great at politics.”

“Yeah. Too great. I don’t wanna run a country or a multinational conglomerate. I just wanna make art with my camera and live with my girlfriend. That’s the life I was meant for.”

Jinx had to hide her furious blush. Lux had come so far to declare this so openly.

Ezreal picked the conversation back up. “Well, my finals were fine. I just barely finished my paper for Professor Morgana. I had to go back through all my notes last minute. It’s just so hard to internalize her lectures when she always looks so hot.”

“Oh my god, right?!” Lux jumped in. “Like, I know I’m supposed to be reading this venn diagram on culture and commerce, but, illuminator, your chest is making its own venn diagram and it’s staring at me!”

The whole table lost it, much to the annoyance of a quieter, preppy-er table nearby.

“Well, mine were a little rough.” It was Seraphine’s turn now. “My final performance for Jazz 3 was sooooo stressful. I just struggle with the growl I needed for the piece, like I went through 5 years of voice training so my voice didn’t sound this low!”

“How about you Jinx?” Ekko asked, the only one free from any finals. “If you fail advanced physics after all the time I spent explaining shit to you, I will never forgive you.”

“Yeah yeah, no one forgot Ekko’s a boy genius who finished a 4 year course in 2 years with an honor roll in Zaunite community college.”

“Not like a physics degree is helping me much these days.”

“Well for the record, I don’t give a shit how my finals go, because I did the math on my classes with the shit I’ve been doing lately. Even if I get a 0 on all my final exams and projects, which I fuckin won’t, I’ll still pass with all C’s. Just what I need to keep my scholarship.”

They all groaned collectively.

“Jinx.” Ezreal said. “You are cutting that shit too close.”

“Yeah.” Now Seraphine joined in the gangbang (mmm. That wasn’t a bad image though) “You’re gonna give your poor girlfriend a heart attack.”

“No no, it’s fine.” Lux did not sound fine. “What matters is you did great, Jinx, and I’m sure you’ll get good grades. I… really really hope you do.”

Ekko clicked his tongue.

“Y’all shoulda just graduated by now, like me.”

They each took a turn shoving him.

--

The week after, Jinx stood in the wide expanse of Piltover International Airport, with a suitcase trailing behind her, and a deep anxiety in her chest. Tomorrow, they would be in Demacia, and before long stepping foot into Lux’s childhood home. To top it off, she had just taken what was supposed to be her last ever dose of shimmer. She was already feeling withdrawal creeping in from such a small amount, but if they’d done it right it wouldn’t be enough to be dangerous. (She was so excited to come back from the trip go to group, so she could finally get her first sobriety coin)

 Whatever anxiety she was feeling, Lux was probably feeling it worse. The next few days would likely define the course of her entire life.

But when Jinx turned to look at her, Lux’s face was pure determination. She smiled back at Jinx, and took a deep breath in.

“Ready?”

Jinx smiled.

She was well and truly in love.

“I’m ready.”