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Chapter Text

"What's your deal?" Lila said from the other side of the couch which Kate was seated on watching Teen Titans.

To be fair she was partially watching it and partially dosing off because she has watched season one teen titans so often that she can recite nearly every line Raven has. Plus season one was boring as fuck especially episode eight but this kid just kept insisting on watching it.

Lila probably liked how miserable it made Kate - so she sat there with her cosy little purple blanket that Laura gave her for Christmas - snuggled up on the couch and practically squealed her way through episodes one to eight with Pizza dog on her right not even wanting to move once. Mind you eight episodes times 20 minutes each was two hours and 40 minutes.

Yea. The agony. The pain.

She sat trough nearly three hours of Teen Titans squealing in her seat. Flexing her muscles every two minutes - having chopped down her fingernails to barely there within half an hour and counted everything she could find sorting it in groups and categories. Like four forks and two spoons were cutlery but with the six cups on the table it was all kitchen stuff.

And she did that bullshit for every fucking single thing she could see. Of course, she was going crazy but she couldn't just ask Lila to switch to a later season. She already asked once and hell rained down on her. Plus this was kind of like Lila's house. She wanted to have everything under control and know what everyone was doing - like the perfectionist older sibling with the only exception that she was fifteen (and narcissistic) and not at all the oldest here.

Creepy much.

Even Cooper (same age as Kate might I add) - who was two years older than her - couldn't stand her but right now Kate didn't want any stupid fight with Clint Barton's wonna be suck up - pick me daddy - daughter.

Plus her injuries wouldn't let her leave even if she wanted to. Having a rib cracked and three broken was kind of a little bit more painful than you would expect. And everything in her begged her to go to sleep - wanted to rest - damn she felt like she had no energy at all but at the same time she felt so restless and hyperactive while everything in her hurt.

Every time she would doze off either Lila threw a pillow at her and couldn't stop laughing by how disoriented and alert Kate was or dreams and memories of blood and gunshots wrecked her brain making her jolt awake only to be followed by more pain in her torso and shoulder.

"I am not sure, I understand the question." she said carefully choosing her words as they came out as some sort of weird one word one sentence type of thing. Where the fucking this this come from? What's her deal? How is someone supposed to answer to that?

"You slept with my dad didn't you?" Lila said

"What?? Gross." Kate stared at Lila. Slept with who now? Clint? Huh? Where did she get that? They were literally watching a superhero show about some kids kicking villain ass. Lila just glared at her. If eyes could kill she would be dying a slow and agonizing death right now by the way this little bastard tried to stare her down.

But well - eyes couldn't kill and even if they could, they were no match for what Fisk and her mother did to her.

"Why would you-?"

"He smiles more." Lila cut her off. How was that something bad though? Didn't Lila want her dad to be happy?

Before she could say something Lila beat her to it.

"He smiles more. He is happier." she let out a weird huff with like an evil smile filled with hatred. Yea Kate has read enough enemies to lovers to know what a smiled filled with hatred looked like. Sue her for being a gay little bean with unrealistic fantasies.

"Since aunt Nat died. My aunt. Black widow. I am sure you know her. He stopped smiling. Even before when we would travel a lot - while the blip thing happened. When he went on missions and killed people for money and fun - he wasn't as sad and gloomy like after aunt Nat died." she said.

Wait... Clint's entire family wasn't bleeped? Lila was there with him? She knows about the killing - the violence?

"And then you show up. Ruin his Christmas - start something completely out of the blue - make him stay behind and have to help you. You are like - like a damsel in distress. A perfect little princess that needed saving."

Oh, you naive little idiot. If you only knew -

"You aren't even a year older than me." Lila pointed her hands at Kate.

"I am seventeen kid." Kate said calmly. There was no need to get emotionally invested in some kind of stupid-made-up-child-talk bullshit. Well that and she just didn't care - the shock wore off and if anything - Kate could only explain her emotions as curiosity right now.

Haha. Stupid feeling. Why was she so bad at that stuff?

"Don't call me kid you stupid idiot."

"Lila there is no need to swear now." Kate said and the kid just seemed to get even more angry.

Well at least don't swear out loud. I couldn't give a shit too much to know what you are thinking about.

"Like I said. I did not sleep with your dad. I was at a black market auction and there was an attack so in the panic I took the Ronin suit and beat some dudes' ass. Then I got owned in a parking lot but your dad was there and he like punched them all before practically kidnapping me and also almost punching me." Kate said replaying all the little details that she left out - like the dead body she saw or the fact that her apartment got burned to the crisp. Should she also mention the bell tower? Nah, that would be too much.

"So you are a burglar?" Lila said and all Kate could do was pull a confused grimace with the words what the actual fuck shining behind her eyes.

"Look. I don't care." Pff, no shit but this conversation proves otherwise.

"But you took my dad away." she said and something in Kate twisted. She did what?

"Yea," oh she probably made a face "You took my father away. With your dog and your perfect little life and your injuries and the drama. He was perfect you know and then aunt Nat died and he closed off entirely - we don't even know what to talk about any more - we normally sit quietly on the table eating and mom does most of the talking. Dad just smiles when she's around. But now you crush in and he can't stop telling jokes - bickering around - he's got so many new topics we could talk about - he is even starting to talk about aunt Nat more." Lila was now literally a tomato but all Kate could focus on were the words that left her mouth.

"You took him from me. Changed him. He talked to me the most you know. I made him smile - he taught me how to shoot arrows - he taught me how to cook. And then some fucking bastard swoops in and takes my place. Do you really think you can replace me?!" Lucky was on her now grinning his teeth up at Lila.

"Calm down boy. She doesn't mean it." Kate went to grab Lucky's collar but the dog stood stoic in front of her only leaning his ears back. Oh, this is bad - she can't let Lucky attack this kid. She can barely even get up by herself without pain shooting through her like a lightning bolt.

"Of course I do you bastard. You think you can show up and take everything from me?"

"Lila it's enough. Please leave." a voice ringed behind her. Cooper? How long has he been there?

"You deserve every bad thing that has happened to you times ten." Lila's finger was nearly 30 centimetres away from Kate's nose when Lucky finally snapped and started backing at the girl who squealed away.

"Fucking freak."

"Get, the fuck, out of this room you ugly cow." Cooper pointed his finger at the staircase indicating her room.

"Can't even control a stupid dog." she head Lila mutter as she walked away

"Don't command me around."

"Well by the looks of it you really need someone who will finally do so." Cooper shot back and there was a short bicker between them Lila trying to hit him but Cooper was obviously older and physically stronger so she was easily defeated with a shove towards the stairs.

"Blablabla. Talk how much you want. But guess what. No one care. So get your nose out of your ass and stop being a self-centred arrogant bitch." Cooper cut her brable off shutting her up

"You stop being a stupid bitch trying to act like you don't give a shit." Lila bickered back and showed him the middle finger before running to her room.

"Damn. That was -"

"Entertaining?" Cooper grinned looking at Kate

"Kind of. I would use shocking but entertaining could - meet it too."

Chapter Text

"Ice-Cream or chocolate?" he asked and waltzed over to the kitchen.

"Chocolate ice-cream." Kate flopped back against the couch again. Lucky decided to stay seated on Kate's legs.

"I see we will be good friends." Cooper smiled and jumped over the back of the couch giving Kate a spoon and opening the box of ice-cream.

"Can we please change the episode? Season one is driving me crazy." Kate asked faking cries although she was very sure that if she had to suffer more season one teen titans she would have actually started crying.

"Yea. Of course. Season three or four?" Kate just made the 'I don't care' hand gesture - which was just a wave - and they were on season three of Teen Titans. Has to be her favourite season - very Raven centric that's for sure.

"How's the arm doing?" Cooper asked and she just glanced down at the thing - wrapped around in a cast and smeared with all kinds of stuff Yelena drew on it when she was bored.

"As good as new I suppose." she looked at him. That shit was nowhere near new.

"So... How much did you hear?" Kate asked after the intro passed and she had already scooped another ball of ice-cream.

Cooper let out a breath "I knew something was fishy when you practically hyperventilated and Lila just sat there laughing." he said.

It wasn't that bad, was it?

"Hey, you're not a freak." he flicked a finger at her temple that made her chuckle a bit.

"That would be something new." she said still not peeling her eyes from the TV.

"Yea but like. Only the freaks are the cool ones. You know. I still go to high school and at the beginning I was the weird psycho that played the drums but then I got more and more friends because I had so many interests that it just made sense you know."

Yea... No - you lost me there bud. But I am too scared to ask for like no reason so let me just nod like a normal person would be expected to.

"You're not weird. Lila is just jealous." he said handing her the ice-cream.

"Well she had a reason to." Kate said under her breath - Cooper still heard her.

"To be honest. She should be thankful. You brought back dad. Safe and sound - well kind of. Let's say in one piece. Probably took down some big mafia bullshit organization and are making dad happy. Plus I finally got a little sister that is not annoying." he ruffled through her hair - grinning.

"You know I am probably older than you don't you?" Kate shooed him off - grinning to herself.

"Plus Imma be gone in a day or two."

"No way. You are at least two years younger than me." Cooper spoke apparently deciding to ignore the second half of the sentence.

"Why does everyone keep saying that? I am literally 17 turning 18 in like half a year." Cooper's face just lit up as he stared at her

"Oh my gawd same!" he held his hand high to high five her.

"The 22nd of June. Try to top that." Kate grinned folding her arms in front of herself.

"I swear in another universe we are fucking twins." he said and now she was the one staring at him

"We have the same exact birthday?" she practically squealed and after a nod Cooper joined her excitement too.

When the laughter and adrenaline wore down they turned back to watching TV before Kate broke the silence again.

"You know - I had a twin." she side eyed him.

"Neat. Me too. A little sister. Damn she was so lousy and scrappy - always got picked at but still somehow beat everyone's asses. I always made her hair but it was still messy and all tangled up." he grinned looking over at her.

"What happened? Wh-"

"She was adopted." he cut her off

"There was this woman and she took her from me and the rest is history. Then mom and dad were like: Hi my dudes. We are your PARENTS :D. And we. Are goings to take you with us." Cooper said waving his hands around and casually changing his voice while Kate grinned.

"Wow.

"Yea. I didn't get adopted for 10 years." Cooper nodded and smiled "Kind of thankful for it."

"Yea." Kate said. What the hell is she supposed to say else?

"What happened to your twin? I mean you are the daughter of like the richest woman in New York."

"Meh. I'm adopted. But I remember that I loved a woman with red hair a lot. I don't know who she is. I can't remember her any more. But after some time she was gone. Probably because my brother and I were like put up for adoption. It's ironic because I have a photographic memory but can't really remember anything clearly." she said

"You have a photographic memory? That's so cool."

Oh, yea. No it's not. It is not cool remembering every single thing that ever happened in precise detail.

"Yea. And I can write with left and right." he just started in awe

"Anyway my brother was like so cool but I never told him. He knew though." she added

"We both need therapy." Cooper held up his palm in a high five.

Kate just grinned and high-fived him.

"Lila likes to think she's the oldest. Wants to have everything under control. Sorry for her behaviour. Whether she meant what she said or didn't - doesn't matter - what matters is that it isn't true." Cooper said after some time.

Well that was a fast topic change.

"Did you hear me?"

Kate nodded leaning back against the couch.

"I think I know what's up though." he started again

"You took the costume and the mafia was on you and dad had to clear your name." Cooper said. Kate just huffed - amused.

"Yea. I was also the one that tore down the belltower."

"No way!"

"Yes way." she looked at him for a second before turning to face the TV again "And I saw a dead body. I kicked mafia ass but then boom dead body in some dude's apartment that I HAD to go to. And then I got owned in a parking lot because come on. A dead body. I don't know why I had to freeze and stop functioning. But then your dad came and boom. Day saved." Kate said

"Huh."

"And they burned my apparent to a crisp. Then we went to my aunts house - she wasn't there and we might have broken in but that is not the point here. Anyway Clint was all. Do your injuries cleaning. And he went back but the suit was gone and yadayadayada he gets kidnapped I try to save his ass but then boom I fall and there are guns and it was loud and there was an epic fight. I left out the part where your dad was taped on a toy pony and had to ride it. I helped a dude with some relationship advice and learned about trust yadayadayada. A few days later. Boom." she makes explosion movements with her hands "Black widow assassin throws me off a roof but fear not because I nearly shot her and stuff. Yea. And like the last day wasn't really the best." Kate said and finally locked eyes with Cooper who was starting at her wide eyes - mouth half open.

"That is a lot of boom and pewpewpew for less than a week you know."

"Meh."

"Meh? You got beaten half to death."

"Fisk mistook me for a rag doll and threw me around a little. I got shot at too but like. It is what it is." she brushed it off.

Chapter Text

"Mom-" Kate practically begged as she put a shaky foot in front of the other.

Getting hit by a car and sent through a windshield of another one was no fun. Considering all the additional cuts and sharp glass decorating her body.

"Oh Sweetie. You don't know how much I would have loved avoiding this." the calmness in her mother's voice sent a shiver down her spine.

"Mom please!" and a sharp pain cut through her abdomen pulling her to her knees. The palm that held her side now reaching for the new wound.

Why was she doing this? Why was her mother hurting her while everything Kate wanted to do was protect her?

She ran down a 60-floor building for the first time just to keep her mother safe - and the woman was repaying her with this?

A bullet in her abdomen and a dagger in her heart.

The archer's eyes watered and her head spun. This was too much. The explosions - the fighting - the gunshots - left her ears ringing as she tried getting up again.

And she wanted to say something - scream - shout - cry. However, there were no emotions for her right now but the bittersweetness suffered by betrayal.

She didn't know what was sadder. The fact that she was doing all this to protect her mother only to get stabbed in the back or the fact that she pulled Clint into this - finally made his life a little less miserable and was now going to die on him.

Shouldn't have lied when she shoved him to the side and got shot in the fucking shoulder.

The look of pain and worry in Clint's eyes didn't make it better.

"I have to do this Kate." and from then on time seized to exist.

"Mom-" she whispered

Kate just stared.

There were no words she could use to explain what she was feeling right now.

Real talk she hasn't even really realized what happened - only that she got a couple of bullets stuck in her.

She was supposed to feel sad right? Angry - enraged - upset. But all Kate could feel was emptiness and betrayal as the man walked closer to her.

"Do you want me to give you a fair fight before killing you?" he stopped right in front of her before grabbing her by the collar and pulling her up with only one hand. A second later she felt metal against her temple.

Why wasn't her mother doing anything?? Yea she was adopted but that didn't mean that her mother shouldn't care about her...

Now with her feet dangling down searching for the ground - she really felt the bullets dig further into her body. Nausea and dizziness hitting her like a thunderbolt.

The metal stayed there for a bit too long but when it finally rang - the bullet scratching the top of her ear and pulling a little cry out of her - echoing to the back of her head. He decided for her then - ok.

"I'm going to give you a fair fight before killing you." he declared not even affected by the force the gun let out - the ringing that followed and the coldness it left behind.

"Come on Hawkling fight me." he said shoving her back as she crumbled to the ground back first.

And the maniac laughed - her mother joining a second later.

All the air had left her body by now and she knew that the only reason she was still conscious was the adrenaline fuelled by pain and fear that kept ripping through her. With an attempt to stop the pain and ringing in her ears she pressed her palm against her right ear completely forgetting about anything else.

This can't be how she dies - by the hands of a Kingpin her mother laughing in the back.

What would Yelena do after this? I mean yea Yelena was strong, smart, beautiful but she was still human and she did care about Kate a bit. Would she go after Fisk and her mother? No, she can't go after Eleanor - she's still her mother...

And for the first time ever she thought about what if they hadn't met? What if Kate never found that suit - never met Clint - never met Yelena.

Oh, damn she really liked having Yelena around - the cool relationship they had - the whole frenemy thing - had to be one of her favourite things considering the fact that Yelena was one of the first people to ever see her as a human and not a bag of money.

Plus whenever she tried to be intimidating Kate couldn't get her mind off the fact that she was so cute and tiny. All she wanted to do was cuddle her to death.

And as the man came closer her heart skipped a beat - too stunned to even move. No time to think about Yelena I guess.

Now she knew why deer stare at a car when it's about to hit them.

A foot collided with her ribs two times before she used an arrow to stab it.

"You fucking bastard." he cried growing more aggressive.

Several throws around the street - against walls and cars - sent her flying through the window of a toy store - dressing her already scuffed face with even more wounds and cuts. How the hell did her eyes not get poked out??

Yes her vision was blurry but still there - and her breath uneven - it took no genius to know that glass was all over her - her hair - face - even ripping tiny bits of her costume and sinking into her skin.

This was bad. Very bad. The only thing Kate managed to do was stab Fist with numerous arrows and by the looks of it he didn't seem to care. She on the other hand was burning in agonizing pain. Thank you adrenalin for keeping me alive.

The man waltzed over to her - a gun and a baseball bat in his hand as he toddled over to Kate who was currently in a pile of teddy bears from one of those claw machines that never worked.

"Want me to make this easy or do it the hard way?" he asked kneeling over Kate.

She slowly opened her eyes looking at him. Damn that was hard. She knew there was a trail of blood behind her and on the teddy bears. And for a second she really wished she didn't spit at him in response because he wiped off the spit and she felt the bat collide with her side.

"The hard way it is then you crazy bitch."

She knew she let out cries and she knew she was going to die but god-damn it this was painful as fuck.

Hopefully Yelena will be fine though. Damn, she really liked Yelena and now she was leaving her. Well she was dying so it wasn't really her choice - death or life that is.

After probably getting her ribs broken in bits and a shoulder dislocated - the cries had muffed down to exhales of breath and grunts. She could still hear him talk bullshit but she couldn't make out what.

Her head snapped to the side and she felt a bigger droplet of blood creep down her face as the man in front of her became unrecognizable.

The last thing she remembers was a black blob running her way - unbothered by the roaring gunshots following as it sunk down next to her.

She couldn't see or hear who it was but she knew for a fact that it was Yelena. She could smell that lavender sent the assassin had on her even trough blood and sweat - like now.

The world did go black but just because she closed her eyes. And someone shaking her shoulder made the pain in her head even worse than keeping her eyes open so she just slightly opened them - barely. She could feel feet run around on the ground beneath her but the only thing she wanted to focus on - right now - was Yelena's hand holding hers while rubbing little circles on her skin. It felt good - the only thing that kept her grounded with everything happening around her.

Chapter Text

"KATE!" Yelena cried out

"Get out! Kate it's not safe. Where the fuck are you? KATE!" she screamed into Clint's earpiece.

"Get your shit together old man." she said turning to Clint "I can't reach Kate Bishop. She isn't answering." she said - concern and worry thickening her voice.

"Yelena. Kate's a big girl I think she can handle herself." Clint said as he dusted off his suite. Did Kate design it? Cs it genuinely looked good.

"No you don't get it. I was sent to kill you and Kate." she said and saw the realization hit Clint's eyes.

"Her mother"

"Yes. Now move-" she cut him off breaking into a sprint

"Kate for god’s sake talk to me!" she screamed into the earpiece again. Stealing stuff from an old man isn't ok kids but if it's from Clint Barton then it's acceptable.

She went this way right? Has to be here. Yelena thought as she ran over to more and more broken stuff. Mostly car's. And when she spotted a woman standing in front of a toy store with a broken window she felt her blood run cold.

"KATE!"

Time seemed to slow down because she doesn't remember storming into the room or anything else that
happened.

It was the most idiotic thing she had done - run into a room with Fisk standing in it - while a manic woman stoop outside with a loaded gun.

For the first time in a long time she trusted someone to have her back and trusting an old man with a stick only happened because Kate was in there - getting slowly beaten to death. And because Kate trusted him. If Kate Bishop trusted someone - that isn't her mother for that matter - then Yelena was going to do the same.

This little friendship they have going on. Trust and comfort. Silence and excitement. It made Yelena happy for some reason - nearly as happy as when Natasha was alive.

The way Kate actually sat there with her having macaroni and an awful amount of hot sauce that they had to share one fork with - because she is only one person. The way she run back up after getting thrown off a roof and deciding that 'Oh. Why don't I let the person that tried to kill me live?'.

To be honest when she had her epic leave by jumping out of Kate's apartment - when she said: And don't come in my way Kate Bishop blablabla. Yea she actually wished Kate would - she still can't really understand why though.

And now seeing the archer sprawled onto the floor taking hit by hit from Fisk with barely any movement - oh - it made her blood run cold. If she wasn't this scared for Kate and angry at the world maybe Fisk would have had the pleasure of getting beaten up.

But not today because she had to get him away from Kate - if that fat pork fell onto Kate he would probably squish her archer to death. But before she even had time to react the dude smacked Kate in the head with a baseball bat and the pained little cry that Kate let out brought Yelena back to reality.

Fuck Fisk - Kate needed her.
The most stupid thin she has thaught of in her entire life.

And she ran. There were shots behind her - she didn't care. She kept running - her head so foggy that she didn't even realize when she crashed next to the young archer taking her hand.

"Hey. Hey it's me." she said and could feel her eyes water. What was happening???

"It's ok Kate. It's going to be ok." she said but Kate didn't respond.

"Kate keep your eyes open. Please." she gently shook her shoulders until she realized how wrong and painful it probably was.

Luckily Kate opened her eyes a bit. Just a little. And she could see how unfocused they were - how glassy they were - one of them bloodshot.

"It's going to ok Love. Just hold on for me ok? Don't die. I can't lose you." she said and leaned down meeting the back of the hand she was holding halfway - giving it a soft kiss.

Kate's knuckles were ripped open but weren't they always? It didn't make her skin less soft though.

"I don't know if you can hear me little hawk. But I need you to stay awake. Don't you dare leave me." and she repeated this all the time adding an I love you between it and a lot of it's going to be okeys.

Drawing shapes on Kate's palm not daring to pull her in for a hug because if she had a broken rib it could puncture an organ and kill her - Yelena didn't plan on letting that happen - she watched people storm in - she didn't even know where Clint was or what happened to Fisk.

It didn't matter though because Yelena was lost in those beautiful brown eyes that she forgot to take in the environment around her - until a dude dared touch her and she lashed out on him - leaving him with a broken nose and probably a concussion before - with a lot of difficulty - getting pulled back by Clint and three other dudes.

"Yelena calm down. It's ok - that dude is just a nurse." Clint said - both of his hands on her shoulders.

"It's not fine. Kate's - She."

"We are going to go with her. Everything will be ok. She probably just needs a pack of frozen peas." Clint cut her off. Was he trying to make her smile? Because it obviously wasn't working.

"I don't need you to tell me what Kate needs and what she doesn't Barton." she said shaking his hands off her shoulders.

"I am going to hold her hand and none of you is going to try and stop me because I can and will kill you." she declared to no one and everyone propping herself down next to Kate and taking her hand while the medics continued working seemingly ok with it.

How dare Clint tell her what Kate needed right now? A pack of frozen peas is going to stop the bleeding from several gunshot woungs. Right. And she was Elsa from Frozen.

"Mrs. Black Widow?" a young doctor then spoke up. She was short - black hair, brown eyes - seemingly confident since she didn't hide behind crossed arms like the men did. Someone she could easily take in a fight. Not a threat. Ok.

"We will be taking Mrs. Hawkeye to the hospital and you are coming with us. Her state seems to improve when you are with her so I think it's for the best." the doctor said. Pamm Acharya her name tag read.

And the entire time she didn't let Kate out of her sight. How could she? That dumbass nearly got herself killed the second Yelena looked away.

"Russian?" the woman finally spoke up when they were in the ambulance - already on their way to the hospital.

It happened so fast - which don't get her wrong - is awesome - the faster they get there the better. But Yelena was still in some kind of weird starte of shock where she barely remembered anything. Maybe because she was so focused on drawing circles on Kate's hand and planning all possible ways she will torture Fisk with before letting him die a slow and painful death.

"Ukrainian." Yelena corrected taking a glance at her. The entire time she hasn't looked up. Damn.

"Indian." the woman smiled. Was she trying small talk?

She was probably here because everyone else was too scared. Slay though - she was the only woman on the team and earned Yelena's respect the second she walked over to her and said she was coming with. The men probably shat their pants three times.

"So how did you two meet?" she asked. Was this woman really trying to talk to her while Yelena was occupied holding Kate's hand??? The audacity. It seemed like the doctor didn't even know that Yelena could kill her with one swift motion so fast she couldn't even see coming.

"I threw her off a roof." Yelena said watching Kate's peaceful expression - it was true, that's how they met - the countless little scars decorating it - little glass peaces still seated in the soft skin.

She should get her cool little dinosaur band-aids. Or little heart ones - Kate was another breed of exited when it came to cute stuff.

She was out a long time ago - asleep because the doctors gave her drugs so strong they exhausted her archer immediately. It didn't mean that Yelena stopped drawing shapes on her hand.

The surgery was exhausting too - because she wasn't allowed to go with - which she understood and to the doctor's surprise didn't try to hold them up from.

Clint stormed in 20 minutes later. In that time Yelena had been checked over three times and given a band-aid for the cut under her eye. He was sweaty and smelly - she was too probably and they were given a patient room with the reasoning 'Mrs. Hawkeye will be getting this room after surgery. Also have some towels you probably want to take a shower.'

At least Clint got them fresh clothes before coming here. That's why it took him 20 minutes instead of 10.

She ended up with an oversized purple plover and a pair of soft purple sweatpants she could only assume were Kate's.

And they stayed there for longer than Yelena liked but it meant that the longer they took - the longer Kate was alive.

"You can sit down now. It's been three hours." Clint said. He, too, had been checked over and given band-aids. Far more than Yelena but he also wasn't as deadly and elegant as her so she could let it pass.

"How?" she asked. By his change in expression she could tell he was genuinely surprised that she even descided to talk to him.

"You walk over to the bed and sit down." he said. This man was nearly as dumb folded as Kate sometimes. Only that it was adorable when she did it.

"I can't make myself do that." she said. "I feel like I am vibrating and the world is way too slow. If I sit down I will literally vibrate out of my shoes." she said and continued circling the room.

"Huh. Funny." he said and Yelena just looked at him - eyes frowned nose scrunched up. What the hell did he mean?

He probably caught up on her confusion though.

"Oh. Kate said the same thing a couple of days ago. But she just didn't have anything to do - you are probably worrying your head off."

"Yea and you aren't?" she deadpanned and he just gave her a defeated look.

They fell into a comfortable silence after that - Yelena digging a circle in the floor from walking so much and Clint staying seated on a chair with a bag of frozen peas on his arms and forehead - until the Pamm doctor walked in.

"The surgery was great, I mean there were like two complications but everything else went flawlessly." the doctor said and it felt like a mountain was taken off of Yelena's chest

"She has half of her ribs broken and one cracked - her right arm is in a cast and she has a very bad concussion so we will have to keep her here for some time but since she's in good hands U guess two days will be the earliest I can allow." the doctor said.

"Thank you doctor." Clint spoke from next to her. Oh damn she forgot that dude was next to her.

"Look. This might be hard but we need to know what happened. Do you want me to file an investiga-"

"No." Yelena fiered before Clint could even react.

"We know what happened and Kate will probably know best. I don't want her to feel pressured into something she didn't even get to descide herself. Plus, if we do so - her mother will twist it and turn it so that it doesn't even touch the surface of the truth." Yelena reasoned.

What Kate needed right now was a soft bed with a cosy blanket and hot chocolate, maybe a cool book, cute band aids and a lot of sweets and backed goods. Not some kind of police bullshit that will follow her for the next few years and traumatise her more.

The doctor just nodded. "I don't know how she didn't lose more blood - it's a miracle. 20ml more and she would have been dead. Would you like to see the bullets we pulled out or?"

"Give them to me. She doesn't need to know now." the doctor just nodded - leaving them in the room.

"Didn't know you were so close with Kate." Clint said from the side

"Didn't know you were so close with Kate. Blablabla." she mocked turning her heel

"Geez." Clint said about to start a sentence but deciding against it when met with those dagger eyes.

What felt like an eternity but was declined with a look at the clock ended up being 5 minutes. 5 minutes since the doctor left and Kate was brought into the room.

There she was - her archer - safe and sound after such a long time - Yelena smiled again. That idiot was going to be the death of her - and so be it.

Chapter Text

Staying with the Barton's was nice. Nate was a little bundle of happiness and innocence. Cooper was cool too - he let her borrow clothes and books because she got here with a half empty backpack and falling apart sneakers.

Lila was a bit hard to get to know. Ever since that encounter they haven't talked a lot. Which was actually pretty long since it happened like what? A week ago?

Lila always had to stare at her - had a close eye. Always pointed out the things Kate did - like sniffing at the water before drinking it.

She did it since she was a kid and never in her life actually noticed until Lila pointed it out.

And Cooper would tell her to stop being mean. Laura once pulled her into another room and talked with her. After the chat Lila hadn't even said a word to her. Ever. Not even when asked. She'd just roll her eyes at Kate and walk away.

It wasn't worth changing herself only for Lila though - to be liked by the kid. So she just took whatever the kid threw at her and made it a joke. It occurred to her rather late that Lila did not like it.

And Laura was amazing. Kate didn't know someone could be more amazing than the one and only Hawkeye but his wife was way better than him in so many ways that it turned Kate's world view completely.

Yelena on the other hand was probably the meanest person she has seen when someone dared say something bad about Kate.

Normally Lila would suffer the anger her friend built up but to be honest it was kind of her own fault.

Even her health was getting better. With a big doze of painkillers and some kind of weird mint cream her wounds started heading drastically.

The day before she learned how to walk again which was cool. Yelena having multiple panic attacks trying to tell her she could take a day or two as rest before doing so.

But come on. It was walking. Literal muscle memory. So Kate got on training again. Doing basic stuff that will help her in a life-threatening situation. Like kicking and punching.

Her right arms still in a cast she reached up with her left one to get a glass for the little boy.

Today was an ok day. It went way too good to be a normal ok day though. Something in her stomach twisted - a feeling she hadn't felt for the time she spent with the Barton's.

And maybe it was the fact that Yelena wasn't near her for the first time in weeks or the fact that something in her stomach twisted but this day was going way too good to be true.

To her dislike she saw the lump she felt in her stomach the whole day - in the form of a van and a couple of armed men right when she was getting a glass for Nate.

"You good Honey?" Laura's voice ringed in her ears and she slowly turned to face her. What? A glance at the floor showed the glass she was holding shattered and broken in thousands of peaces. Kate standing in the middle of it.

"I think you should." she took a breath trying to make her brain work again. "You should go to the safe room." she said slowly looking back up at Laura who was on her way over.

"Yea. I think you should um. Take the kids you know. Cooper, Nate." why were her hands shaking so much? "Lucky."

"Kate what are you talking about?" Cooper asked from the couch - sprawled over it and playing video games.

"You know - that's a very good idea. Cooper get Kate and Nate in the safe room." Kate was about to blabber something out but Laura beat her to it.

"Kate you are injured. Don't even think you're going anywhere."

"No. No you go. I can't. And even if - I would probably die to a heart attack. Claustrophobia and stuff." Kate tried to reason searching for her bow. It was leaned against the wall next to the TV and with a swift motion she stepped over the broken glass stabbing her foot but ignoring it for the sake of everyone's sanity.

"Kate don't be stupid." Cooper said from behind her.

"I'm not stupid Coop. It may not seem like it but I am very sure we will all die. I prefer I die over you so now shut up and go to that damn safe room before I drag you there with a knife to your throat." she grabbed the arrows next to it strapping them around her back.

Was there a use to it? No absolutely not. Her right arm was fucked and you can't really use a bow with one arm.

It was irritating. And scary. It made her blood boil - the problem was that she didn't know what.

"Kate."

"Go!" and she left the room without facing them. Those ripped off - falling apart sneakers really need replacement she thought as she slipped them on moving stepping outside.

There they were. 2 men. But the problem wasn't the amount of men because 2 men were nothing for her. The problem was the gun held to Lila's head as they stood there.

The girl whimpering and shaking while being held by a strong grip.

"Give up or I will shoot you and the kid." the one that was holding Lila threatened pointing the gun at her and then back at Lila.

"Um. Yea ok. Ok. So this is like a trade-off or?" and the man just scoffed.

"We let her go when we have you tied up and in the back of this van silent and barely conscious." the man spoke.

"Uh well wow. That was straight forward. Can I at least like? Tie my shoes before you knock the living shit out of me and shove me in the van as if you aren't just kidnapping me?" she asked slowly letting the bow fall next to her.

"Do that and then come over slowly. Any sudden move and I shoot her bro." the man pointed the gun back at her and Kate slowly kneeled to tie her shoes.

"Hurry up!" and god-damn it give her a break ok. She is probably going to be dead in 24 hours let her tie her cheap-ass sneakers.

"Arrows too Smartass." the other one spat - so she snapped the quiver open and the arrows chattered to the ground.

"So... How are we going to do this?" she slowly walked over expecting someone to hit the back of her head and shoot some kind of serum in her veins.

"Like you said. Beat the living shit out of you and if you resist shoot her." the man threatened and Lila was now practically vibrating out of existence. Her face full of tears and - was that snot? No time to think though because she felt some kind of force collide with her abdomen and after 2 seconds she felt the pain following.

It didn't end there. Of course, it didn't. It continued until she was forced on the ground - gravity pulling the best out of her - being kicked and stumped on by grown ass men while her mouth dripped down blood.

She could hear them talking she just couldn't make out what and the second they stopped she dared turn on her stomach and spit out all the blood that filled her mouth and nose. With a heavy pant she moved 10 centimetres away and crashed into the snow the second she was sure her blood wouldn't land all over in her face.

Aggressive hands grabbed her arms jancking her up and she could feel herself sack under the grip knees barely touching the ground as her head rolled forward too heavy to be held.

She didn't know when she was thrown into the back of the van and when the tracksuit mafia strapped her hands together with a rope so hard that she felt her hands start going numb after some time. They even ripped the cast off which was hella painful.

When the buzzing in her ears finally stopped and her vision started to come back she found herself leaned against a metal wall - apparently still in the van.

There were voices around her but she couldn't make out what they were so she decided that sitting up was the best thing she could do.

The blood dripping down her nose and mouth was partially dry.

"Kid! Look at me." was that? Was that Clint?

She did as told - seeing Clint sit in front of her - hands strapped to his back and feet together. Ok this was weird. Laura was next to him.

Wait why was Laura here?

"Wh-" ok this was fucking much. What the fuck was happening?

"They beat the living shit out of you dude." someone spoke from next to her and simultaneously made her startle.

"No shit." she answered looking at Cooper. Still panting from the shock and pain in her head and arm.

Oh, so the kids were here too. Well fuck. This wasn't a kidnapping it was a fucking massacre.

"Katie are you ok?" Clint called

"As good as one can be."

"That's not English. Do you have a concussion?"

"I don' know. I head hurt tho." she grinned rubbing her hand against the tip of her nose to get rid of the blood dripping down it.

"Ok kid. Listen to me." Clint said. You have to take off your shoelaces and then - "

"Shut up." Kate cut him off and if her mind weren't this foggy she would have seen the shock that came over Clint's face. She probably wouldn't have even said that.

"Kate."

"No. Shh. You're hurting my brain." she slurred slowly reached over taking out a little blade she sneaked into her left sneaker when she tied them.

What? Did you really think she would be trying her sneakers for no reason but mobility while in the middle of a gunfire? Idiots.

With a swift motion she yanked the ropes across it making them cut in two and also pull some blood since her hands were blue and numb from the lack of blood. She didn't know where her hands were - exactly. And moving the right one seemed to be a stupid move.

With her now free hands she leaned back staring at them. A fucking dark blue colour decorating them as they shook from not only cold but stress too.

"Oh wow. I was not expecting that." she heard Clint say but he was shushed by Laura.

"Sitand still." Kate said sliding over to Cooper and slicing open the ropes around his wrists and ankles too.

"I don't think I can stand still." Cooper joked but the memo couldn't get through to Kate. She just focused on getting the kids out of the ropes before slowly turning to Laura and Clint who were in metal chains.

It felt as if the mafia thought Clint and Laura were more dangerous than her and the kids. And real talk they probably were.

Laura had to be some kind of spy. She just had to.

"I want you to run as fast as you can whan this thing staps." she said search for something like a pin hopefully taking the string of her sneakers but it didn't help.

"Ugh. Fuck." and she grunted feeling the van slowly come to a stop - from then on time decided that it will fly by in the fastest slow motion Kate has ever seen.

She assumed they stopped to get fuel or on some kind of parking lot.

The second she heard people get out the van she worked on the lock sliding in her blocked credit card which was still in her pocket.

It could be useful ok. Let her be paranoid. It helps in a situation like this.

It didn't take a lot of time but it was clearly enough for the men to jump back in - right before they started the engine Kate pushed against the door barely catching herself from falling out.

"Get out. Run." she said - Cooper trying to help her but she declined helping Nate out.

"Get then somewhere safe. Call Yelena. Or I don't know. Just get out of here." Kate said and turned.

"Kate what the hell are you doing?!" Clint screamed from the back pulling all her attention.

"They aren't going to make it." Kate panted jerking to the side when she heard shots.

"Stop bro!" someone called out and she looked at Laura apologetically turning the corner and kicking the man in the face.

As good as she could of course. With no perception of where her body was it was quite difficult doing so. She didn't make it far though - with the little energy she had left she found herself blocking kicks and punches - using the back door to plant it in one's face before finding herself face to face with the other man and a gun pointed at Clint.

"I'm sorry. I -" and she raised her hands staring at the gun and sneaking looks over to Clint and Laura.

"Don't be an idiot! Run Katie!" Clint screamed and it hurt her brain but no. No she can't. They'll kill mo-. Laura and Clint. No.

"Ok. Enough tantrums. Now get into van and sit still before I shoot them bro." he pointed the gun at her for a second but seeing how it didn't affect her at all he pointed it back at Clint's head.

"Ok. Ok. I'm coming." she said getting onto the van hands raised above her head.

"Kate-"

"Shut up bro!" the constant screaming hurt her brain so much she just wanted it to stop.

"Don't do something stupid." the tracksuit advised her but it was too late. She kicked him in the gut before he could even react pulling a cry from his lips.

And the key for the cuffs was probably in his pocket and see see there it was.

Still taken aback the dude didn't even notice when she stole the key - pick pocket skills coming to a hard clutch right now - throwing it towards Laura and Clint.

It also took her enough time for him to recover and charge at her - missing her jaw for a hair. Well her jaw could escape the first hit - that wasn't to say for her temple.

And she felt herself stumble back trying to focus her vision - before more pain followed and she found herself lying in a pool of her blood face first on the metal floor.

Letting out a small breath - she opened her eyes slowly.

Laura was saying something but Kate couldn't listen - it was too hard to focus on what she was saying. And she tried - she really tried.

" 'm sorry - mum." she managed to let out right before darkness overtook her.

Chapter Text

"Wakey wakey sleepy head." a voice spoke and it was too far away to be considered affective to concentrate on. 

So she slowly rolled her head back trying to take in anything else than the pounding headache in her skull and agonizing shots of pain that shook her body with every breath she took. 

Her wrists and ankles tied together while she sacked back into a chair. 

Oh, god was the man still talking? He clearly got louder. Maybe because the buzzing got quieter. 

"I said wake up you dipshit." he said. Or something similar. Kate couldn't make it out. 

So she used all the energy she had left to shift and look at him - eyes barely open from the amount of pain they brought her. Thank god the room was kind of dark because sunlight will 100% kill her. Hehe vampire Kate go brr. 

"What'd you say?" she asked and it came out as a huff at first but the longer she sat in this chair - bound to it as if the person that gut here here was scared she'd hurt them or something. 

The man seemed kind of angry but collected. Like the kind of mad mafia bosses that were trying to stay nice while they got tolled their whole family was killed for money. 

"Ok you little shit. You're going to tell me why you let those other little shits out or I will fuck you up in so many ways you will regret doing so." oh damn. He really didn't have any patience. 

"Don't pull them into this. t's just me and the track-suits. They are some random ass kids." Kate said. 

"You know you are worthless don't you?" he asked and oh god it hit a nerve. Where did it even come from?? 

Like yea of course, she did. But still. Dude??? 

Even a fish is worth more than her. The words her mother would speak every time before hitting her. 

"And that the world would generally be better off without you in it?" he spoke 

Kate just looked at the ground trying to not give him the satisfaction he was searching for.

"So just kill me. Pull the trigger - blow up my brain. Why mix other people into a soup they didn't even know was being prepared?" she asked hearing him get up and slowly circle her. 

"Ooh. We've got a poet. But with that broken arm you can't do much sweetheart. Can you?" 

"I said kill me. Blow me up - set me on fire - cut my artery."

"Oh but where would the fun be?" he asked and something hot burned her neck - pulling out a small hiss. 

"Ah I love it when they scream." he said tossing his now useless cigarette to the ground. 

"Tell me. Do you like screaming?" he asked from behind her and his hand was on the back of her neck slowly reaching over and grabbing her chin before pulling her head so that it was laying on his shoulder. 

"Would you like me to end it all now?" and a cold metal glided over her stretched skin - not cutting but still there. "Like you said." 

Fuck. Fuck, fuck fuckfuck. Fuck - everything Kate could think about. 

She had nothing against dying a fast death. But painful?? Suffocating on her own blood and flooding around like a dead fish?? No, thank you. Next? 

It did sting a little letting a droplet slide down her neck but then it moved away the man coming around and kneeling in front of her. 

"I can see that you are scared." he said and there was something soft in his eyes. "But I want you to know that I am going to have a hella good time doing this." he said and turned leaving her stunned sitting there. Squirming like an idiot in the chair. 

----

"You know your mom loves you don't you?" the man asked and plopped down next to her. 

He threw out the chairs and injected something in her neck that made her feel even weaker than she already was with her brushed and scarred body. 

Then dragged her over to the wall and let her lean on it. No cuffs - no ropes - nothing. 

"Who do you think you are to be able to talk about my mother?" Kate scoffed finding it fairly hard to focus on her surroundings. 

Even talking was hard now. 

Half the pain she felt while being beaten half to death. 

But in like some kind of a  miracle she didn't feel the pain from that night. No shot wounds - no broken arm although she couldn't move it at all which made her panic a bit more than it should - no broken ribs... 

And she was sure something was wrong. Because it wasn't painkillers. If it were painkillers she wouldn't feel the pain from the last beating she got. Before being throw into a van and driven to god knows where. 

Hell - how long was she even out?? 

"Let's just say she was the one that called and told us where you are." he said and it felt like a rock hit the bottom of her stomach. Not a literal one but under these circumstances she didn't doubt it happening. 

You mean the woman that shot me three times and tried to kill me??? 

"You see your mother is just worried. All this. Heroism - Lesbianism. This - loving women. It's wrong. And she can't take it any more. It's draining her emotionally and mentally having to watch her daughter - which is a disappointment to begin with - go down this road of attention-seeking."

"You mean the woman that tried to kill me?" 

"I can and will help you stop this... behaviour." he ignored her

"That's not how it works." Kate scoffed 

"Of course it is. You just haven't found the right man yet." 

"That's bullshit." she said gently gripping her pullover and feeling her stomach twist. 

'I am going to help you.' nausea hit her - bringing a bunch of unwanted Central Park memories with it. 

Hell nah you aren't. Don't you fucking dare touch me. 

And she felt her heart skip a beat - an awful feeling of being powerless washing over her. 

Nope. This is not happening. It's not going to happen. 

"Don't you just wish you could make it stop?" he asked 

"This feeling like there's this knot in your chest that won't go away." he asked and pulled out an item from his pocket that she identified as something she has seen way too often in her life.

More than she wishes and wanted to admit. 

"I do sometimes. You do too." he said and held it up for her to look at. 

That took a turn. The topic changing within seconds. It fucked with her brain - leaving her more confused than it should. 

"Don't lie to yourself. You know it helps." 

"Stop." 

"Stop what? Telling the truth?" 

"Stop lying." 

"I'm not lying. You know I'm not lying. Your brain might tell you I am lying but your heart knows better." he said and placed the blade between Kate's fingers like she would hold it when she was about to part her skin for the sake of the littlest of serotonin she could get. 

"Don't think about it Katie."

"Shut up. I'm not going to do it." she said 

"So why are you still holding the blade like your life depended on it?" he asked and she wanted to throw it away. To stick it in his leg or eye but her fingers just wouldn't let go of it. 

The craving of feeling something again - having control over something - clogging her mind. 

The only thing she ever had in control... 

No. He wants her to do it. She holds the sword but he's the chess master - he moves the pawns. It was all just an illusion. 

But it felt so good to hold something familiar between her fingers. Dancing around her fingertips ready to cut through anything and everything it's master wished upon. 

No. 

Kate stop. He's trying to hurt you. It's wrong. Don't think about it. 

"I know you aren't capable of making a decision. So your mother is trying to help you." the man spoke after some time.

"Don't talk about my mother." she said and felt the grip around the blade tighten. 

Yes. Stab him. Or slice open his neck. Why can't you do it?? It doesn't even take a lot of energy! 

What? You only have a broken arm - a couple of broken ribs and literally no energy. Why can't you just stab him??? 

"She's worried Katie. She sent you here to get all of those evil and stupid thoughts out of your brain." he said and was he referring to her being gay???? Or to her wanting to help other people? 

"Clint and Laura would be disappointed." 

"They have literally nothing to do with this." it stung though. Considering the fact that he was probably right. 

The only thing Kate did was lie around, watch TV, help whenever she could, teach Cooper maths and take care of Lucky - which was her dog so it didn't count! Fanny got that luxury too. 

"But you see them as mom and dad, don't you? Because they are nice to you, finally treat you like someone worthy of love even though we both know that is not true." he said. Stop telling me what I already know - there's a difference between me saying it and someone else saying it! 

"Or is it because they don't wake you up with an air horn in your face? Because they give you something to eat instead of the typical one snack a day policy?" he asked

And it was true. 

She had grown to like Laura and Clint not only because they were literal spies and secret agents but also because they were so nice. 

Clint would always know when to bug her and when to stop. He would always drag her into the car and spend time with her driving around because she said once that there was nothing she loved more - expected archery and Lucky - than driving around with loud music scratching the back of her head. 

Laura on the other hand insisted on Kate staying tucked under that cosy soft purple blanket she bought her and rest. 

She was genuinely stunned when Kate said she didn't have another favourite food expert Pizza or Mac' n cheese. So she made a different meal every day. 

She was there for advice, was the only person next to Yelena and Cooper that was willing to have meaningless conversations on a serious level. 

"Face it Kate. You're not worth anything. They do that so they don't feel bad not because they actually care. Do you really think someone would take home a bastard that ruined their Christmas? What kind of idiot would think that? Don't tell me you didn't catch up on it. You are a literal genius!" 

"Just go. Shut up. Please." and it came out as a whisper. Even quieter than she thought it would come out as. 

"Kate I'm trying to help you." he said and no. No. He wasn't helping. He was doing the opposite. Stop stroking my hair for god’s sake! 

"How are you helping me? You shot me up on some drug and now want to do what exactly? That's not what helping is." she turned her head a bit to get rid of his hand. 

"We both know you're stupid. We both know you don't deserve anything good in this world. I mean you are one of those. Plus. You even showed us how worthless you are when you chose to free those stupid kids instead of running away yourself." and he stroked her cheek - she jerked away. Why the hell was he changing the topic?? 

And there was silence. 

No he was lying. He was lying. That isn't true. If she ran it would be selfish. And running didn't even cross her mind. That's the only explanation. He was lying. But what were Clint and Laura doing? Were they getting tortured in the room next to her? No. That wasn't what she wanted to happen. They were only here because of her. Her own mistakes - her own egoistic reasons. 

"Don't worry they are home with their kids." the man said from next to her. 

"Wha-?" she looked up at him for the first time. He still had his hand somewhere on her. Either her hair or shoulder or leg - it didn't matter where - it was still there. And it grossed her out. 

"Mom and dad. They left you. They aren't here. We only used them to get to you and they promised to not come after you if we left them alone." he said and flashed her a sad smile stroking her cheek again and she scoffed turning away - it didn't help. 

"They said they would do everything to keep their kids safe. Even if it meant leaving you behind. Because maybe to you, they are mom and dad. But to them, you are just a stranger. A burden they have to be nice to just so they can feel better." and Kate slowly turned back to her precious sitting position. 

They really did that didn't they... They really left... Like everyone else did. I mean. She didn't know how long she has been here but it shouldn't take two spies this long to find her - considering the fact that they themselves were kidnapped too. 

"Leave me alone." 

"Katie" 

"Leave me the fuck alone. You know what I'm thinking you don't have to say it in my face!" she glared up at him

"Please." and for a second she regretted screaming at him because a hand against her cheek made her ears ring again. 

"You're weak." he spat

"The freedom you had with the Barton's really made you rebel didn't it?" he asked and grabbed her chin making her look at him. 

"You became a little shithead didn't you?" he asked and held down her wrists when she tried to push him away. The blade she got pressed in her hand chattering to the floor. 

"You really are an annoying piece of shit." he said and came closer until he was now breathing down her neck - the hand that held her chin in place now travelling down her waist. 

"Stop." she squirmed under his grip but it was to no use. 

"Shut up and let me make you normal again." His hand travelled up her back - down her spine reaching her hair and pulling at it to tilt her head back and start kissing her neck up until she found her lips. 

"No." Kate tried right before he bit down on her bottom lip "Stop. Let me go." but he just tightened the grip on her wrists and started tugging at her pullover. 

"Shut up and give me what I want - you useless little shit. We both know you like this as much as I do" and his hand started touching places it shouldn't.

Making Kate squeal and shed tears trying to kick him away - to no use. 

All good things happened twice, didn't they? So why did Kate get the complete opposite - memories from a year ago already flooding her mind. 

Nope. No. Nonono. This was getting too real. She wanted out. She wanted out now.

Chapter Text

She was going crazy. She was going insane.

He - he. He ripped her shirt off. He pulled at her hair - touched her waist going down down down STOP.

Stop thinking about it. Stop thinking about it. Stop. Stop. Please stop.

Her whole body shook with silent sobs - pulling whimper after whimper until she couldn't shed tears any more. Just soundless sobs and chattering teeth echoing through the cold walls.

And he left here here in the middle of this room loud techno music scratching the back of her ears as she laid there curled up in her own sweat and tears - longing for something other than the wet and sticky feeling that man left behind.

And after he left her here in this dark and cold room - the only thing she could think about was how disgusting she was right now.

How unworthy she was. Of love, of life, of help. Because how could she possibly hope for love and help when she wasn't even able to help herself? When she wasn't able to love herself.

From the beginning of time she despised herself. Hated the way she looked - the way she acted - the way she talked. Well I mean. How can someone that stupid be worthy of love??

She wasn't even able to get that man off of her - she's a multiple gold medal winner - fighting was coded in her bones - my god. But laying there and struggling against those ruff hands and crusty lips...

Having multiple panic attacks did not help either - only left her even more exhausted than before - unable to sleep due to the thoughts that haunted her, memories that tortured her and the music that fucked with the brain more than it should.

So she laid there eyes stinging, ears buzzing - curled up in a small ball on the concrete sobbing and telling herself she isn't going crazy.

But she was.

The walls were coming down on her and the ground was trying to swallow her - everything started getting overwhelming - especially the size of this room. Dark, cold and tiny.

After some time she stopped feeling like Kate Bishop. Felt like she was watching herself from third person. Every emotion she felt disappearing inside this body she had no control over.

Something in her brain just flicked off and it was as if she wasn't in her body any more. Just a body. Because Kate Bishop was dead.

But then Kate Bishop came back and she wasn't in third person. And maybe she wished she could stay in third person. Because for a moment all this pressure seemed to disappear - only to come back even worse - pulling on the last strings of energy she had left.

He was at least human enough to throw her into some clean clothes before she could cry them full and sweat them wet.

And it was dehumanizing.

Everything about it. The way he pulled at her hair - bit her lips - ripped apart her clothing before taking off his.

A hand pressed against her lips keeping her from screaming. Another on her waist keeping her in place.

As if she were some kind of object, a piece of plastic to toy around with...

And the worst part was that there was probably a camera somewhere in here.

Filming every single mark he left and every single scream she cried.

The fact someone was going to see her so weak and pathetic...

The way he bent her arms in uncomfortable positions - made her do things she couldn't imagine doing voluntary. Doing things she already felt once. On a dark snowy night in the middle of Central Park...

Hand gripping her thigh while the other one curled around her neck made her brain beat against the inside of her skull. Desperately scratching for air.

The fingernails that dug into his arms didn't bother him. The way she clawed his neck whenever she could reach it didn't bother him.

It only lit the smile on his lips and lust in his eyes more. Like a big fire trapped in a tiny flame begging for reasons to roar an explosion.

And she threw up after he left. Fingers down her throat more than once - at least she knew how to throw up on command. Naked and cold - curled in a little ball until he came back for a round two.

And it was worse. Sore muscles, no energy left. Everything about it was just worse.

At least he threw her in some new clothes after he finished.

Funny how fast a single person can change your life - forever. Happens to the best of us eh?

Well if it was going to be this - dehumanizing - she would prefer ending it. But of course no one will actually physically kill her. Only mentally. Which they already managed.

She sobbed.

And time passed without letting sleep come over her because of course they wouldn't. She didn't even know how much time passed but it was enough to fit in two mental breakdowns and a couple of panic attacks.

Her heart rate running 100 miles an hour - chest pounding - head hurting.

The moment the music stopped was supposed to make her feel better. She was finally left alone.

Huh, you wish.

The only thing she felt was a stinging pain in her chest. A pain she couldn't compare to the pain she felt while getting beaten up and kicked at. No.

It was a stinging that she always felt while around her mother.

A stinging pain she felt when the man pulled down his pants.

A pain that she felt in the middle of the night on a snowy, cold Christmas in the middle of Central Part.

A pain she felt while lying on the ground a few centimetres away from mo- Laura and Clint - watching Laura say something that Kate couldn't hear.

A pain she felt when her mother pointed a gun at her - clearly aiming for the heart. Lucky her - aiming didn't run in the family. Well now thinking about it, she wished it did.

A pain she felt kneeling in front of her dads grave - holding onto herself as if the world would end if she let go. Alone. In the rain.

A pain she felt while sitting in a big black car tears streaming down her cheeks as a boy ran after the car waving and screaming and crying.

The stupid door wouldn't open. And she kicked it - punched it - hit it but it wouldn't open. She tried kicking the driver but her arms were too short and he was too far away. Leaving her there sobbing like a kid and watching her brother fall behind. She was just a kid. (the doors were childproof that's why they didn't open lmao)

And for the first time - in who knows how long - she wished the music would start again.

All kinds of pictures flashing in front her eyes before the door got kicked open and her heart skipped a beat.

This was bad. This was bad. No. Fuck. Please don't do it again. Please leave. I'm sorry for yelling. I know it's my fault. Just leave me alone please.

She curled up - further in - on herself - the panic already settled in - identified by how fast she hyperventilated and how loud her heart started beating. She could practically hear.

A man came in. The man.

And the rest was a blur.

He was moving his mouth - saying something. But she couldn't understand what. It was too loud - the ringing. She just stared ahead into the endless void of nothingness. The pain from before hitting harder than it should.

She expected it to happen again. All over again. Probably even worse.

And he crossed the room - a belt in his hand - kneeling down next to her and stroking her hair.

The simple gesture driving her mind crazy - heart racing.

She didn't like where this was going. She didn't like this at all.

His mouth continued moving.

She couldn't hear what he was saying though. Well she could but it was distant and watery - as if she were in a deep ocean while he - smiling down at her - drowned her simultaneously.

And he continued stroking her hair until he grabbed her left ear and pulled hard until she was kind of sitting.

Ear burning as she tried to press herself against the wall - as if it would magically eat her.

Her mind was too much of a mush mush to think about why he did that - already wondering around different memories of her mother leaving her left ear burning as if it were in a museum.

It was always the left one that her mother decided to hit. Oh. Probably because she's right-handed. Idiot.

And he made her sit there - talking some bullshit she didn't want to hear. Lucky her the only things she heard were keywords.

Well as we have seen till now - luck wasn't on her side.

Because the man said stuff like disappointing, dad, dead, fault, everything, blame, yourself, mother, help, ungrateful, punishment.

But she couldn't make sense of it. She could only stare up in those ugly greens as he towered over her.

After some time he seemed angry. He grabbed her collar, pulling her up.

And she already saw it coming. That was what made this so sad. The fact that she saw it coming.

And he was about to start touching her. Fingers dancing around her waist - stocking her stomach while his lips found her neck.

And as if in some kind of film another dude walked in pacing a hand on this guy's shoulder.

Kate was too far into numbness to care though. The only thing holding her up - the man's hands.

And just as she felt those ruff hand let got of her - body sacking down knees bending - he hit her.

In the gut - in the back - planting a fist in her eye. Stomping and kicking. Cries and whimpers.

'Shut the fuck up you stupid bastard.' the woman said and a force hit Kate's face - leaving a sting.

' I'm sorry. I didn't mean to.' but Eleanor didn't care. She just closed the door taking off her belt before it got used to decorate her back with bruises and pain. Cutting her skin and sense of worth.

And the man just wouldn't stop kicking her and saying stuff Kate couldn't hear.

The belt got used too. Way too often for Kate’s liking. It stung and hurt and burned and bruised. Maybe it bled - who knows? She clearly didn't. Because she could only feel the burning pain on her back. As if it were on fire.

She didn't hear the door click open again - the ringing in hear ears and panting away the pain way louder than the actual metal clanging around. Only felt a pair of shoes less against her ribcage.

She felt blood tickle down her face and her gut was twisted in several different ways.

Finally filling her lungs with enough oxygen to stop panting she described that the best thing she could do right now was stay laid on her back trying to salvage any beating she could escape. The man let her catch her breath for a minute. She should be thankful.

But it hit too hard to home. The nights her mother would come in her room and hit her for no reason. Tell her stuff that wasn't true until she actually managed to make it sink in Kate's bones. Either through a slap in the face or a verbal dagger in her heart.

Kate didn't know how much time has passed since she last saw mo- no. Laura. And Clint. But they were probably home in the warmth of their home - fire crackling as they drink tea or cacao - playing monopoly with their kids.

And she would have smiled at the thought of Nate and Cooper chasing each other around the house because Nate stole something from Cooper and the older one didn't want to hurt Nate - but well - her face felt like it had been washed with a steel sponge and polished with a rusty rug.

Oh god, she really was selfish, wasn't she? Wanting to have nothing else but a family like that. Loving and caring. Wanting to hug Laura. Bug Clint. Beat Cooper at literally everything. Tell Nate stories. Maybe even braid Lila's hair some day.

Kiss Yelena... Watch the blond wear her clothes as if she weren't a deadly assassin that could kill her in a second. Be able to cuddle her until Yelena relaxed. Stick flowers in the blonds soft braided hair, watch movies till the sun rose while eating popcorn and pizza. Bake cookies and brush flower against the assassin's nose. The way it scrunched up followed by a smile...

Oh, damn she really liked Yelena. But in a Platonic way. Right?

Wow.

She really deserved this then. For being selfish.

Deserved the beating - the humiliation - the... .

Wanting Yelena all for herself?? The cute, amazing, cool, fantastic, hot, adorable, kind, nice, stunning, caring, beautiful assassin???? How could she be so selfish?

Kate didn't deserve Yelena. No one did. She was too much of a muse for Kate to deserve her. Too nice, too beautiful, too perfect for Kate to ever reach the level of being worth Yelena’s time and attention.

"Don't touch me." she let out a whimper not able to do anything else but let herself get dragged out of the room. Aggressive hands painfully gripping at her shoulders and pulling her out of the room.

And she wanted to fight it. Fight whoever was touching her - hitting her. Fight the grip - the men. Everything.

But her muscles wouldn't obey her and her brain wouldn't let her think.

So she hung her head down begging for whatever was to come to be less painful.

Haha.

Then beg.

Chapter Text

They didn't go far, apparently.

Just far enough to drag her knees across the now bloodied concrete and dump her in a chair.

Head slumped down - hair hanging as if it were trying to glue itself to the floor.

She let out a little grunt when they slumped her into the chair before cold touched her wrists and ankles - securing her limbs to the chair with metal cuffs so that she couldn't run away. It didn't seem much of an option though - considering the fact that the young archer buckled under her own weight - her head slumping forward - probably in the most uncomfortable position ever.

"Sit up." a man screamed - oh she could hear again but before she could even react he held something to her shoulder that made her shoot up and scream in pain as the electricity ripped through her body making her slump back into the chair panting heavily.

She could feel the tip of her fingers starting to sting and tried grinning the handle of the chair for support. Bigger pain made the smaller one go away - her mother would always tell her.

Sweat ran down her forehead after the second shock wrecked her. Right eyelid twitching, the feeling in her left arm barely there. Don't mention the right one though - the feeling there was long gone.

"Don't you want to say hi to our guests?" someone spoke. It was too muffed to hear clearly but she heard it.

The sound of electricity ripping through her as loud as the second when it hit her.

Her muscles trembled and she could feel the way gravity trying to pull her down but the metal cuffing her wrists and ankles - so hard it drew blood - held her in place. Although she was sure that the way too tight rope strapped around her waist was the one that held her from slumping forward and crashing into the ground face first.

It would add a bruise to her already cut and ripped open face.

Sweat dripping down her chin.

"I said say hi you fucking idiot." and she felt a clap against the back of her neck - pulling a cry and leaving a sting.

Did he have to do that? Did he have to go so far? Did he like the way she screamed and cried out and jolted up? Did he like watching her sink in on herself? Dehumanize her? Humiliate her?

"Hi." she breathed out not finding any energy within herself to look up or even say something more.

She knew a side of her face was bleeding - beaten - bruised. Just like her body that was now frozen unable to move a finger even though every single muscle in her twitched and left her trembling.

And she felt the pain on her cheekbone but it was distant again. A cut dripping down blood.

The sounds were more muffed though. It was the weird feeling of swimming above your body while still into it.

God, she couldn't take this any more. It was too much. Too much blood - too much pain. While before her fingers were crippling now her whole arms were numb from the electricity.

"How does it feel to get treated like you treat other people Katie?"

She didn't want to listen - she didn't want to hear what he was saying - so she tried concentrating on her breathing - unaware of anything else than the fog starting to frame her brain.

A fourth shock burned the right side of her neck and she was sure she let out a scream so loud it temporarily deafened her. Or it was the electricity - she didn't know and also didn't care. Because she couldn't take the pain any more, she couldn't make it. It's too much. It's too much...

"Oh come on not even a smile for our guests?" she felt her head get tilted up by the chin - unable to fully open her eyes but rather have them half closed.

Her whole body was now sweaty and salty - she couldn't understand what was happening and why it was happening. The only thing she knew was that she wanted it all to stop. She would rather die than have to take this any longer.

"Let's see how much you learned." and speaking of the devil - she felt hands grab her waist as someone collided with her lips starting to kiss them aggressively continuing down her neck - but with her limbs strapped to a chair - frozen in place and body bucked over - leaning onto the person that was doing this to her - there wasn't much she could do other than squirm - her brain too foggy to even let tears fall down her cheeks.

The only thing she could do was whimper before the hands abruptly let go of her and there was screaming.

And shots. And guns. More people screaming.

Someone abruptly got rid of all the bloodied cuffs - gravity pulling her down the second it could.

And she wanted to curl up - hide - do something. But all she could so was watch her fingers twitch - feeling the cold cement take all of her warmth while she laid there unable to even fucking move.

Feet moved around. Muffed sounds that were probably people talking - travelled through the air - but all Kate could hear was ringing....

After some time - boots running, people moving, screams crying - she was aggressively turned to her back being met by a man sitting on top of her and all she could do was look at him while her brain went blank.

She didn't even notice when she forgot where she was. And she tried remembering what happened but she just couldn't.

She was Kate Bishop. That was sure. Daughter of... Daughter or who??? Kate, think!

And the man looming over her had started punching her ribs but she couldn't do anything than take it and let silent tears slide down her cheeks. Damn this was humiliating. And pathetic. Stupid.

The feeling in her arms was now gone completely and she knew nothing. Nothing except who she was. Kate Bishop. And she desperately searched for something in her brain. A trigger - a memory other than what happened in the last few days. But nothing came.

And the punching stopped. The man now over her noses nearly bumping - holding her ears and staring through her eyes.

There were no words Kate could come up with to describe how powerless she felt right now. Nothing else holding her back but her own body. Her arms weren't even cuffed god-damn it and she still couldn't move.

He was screaming something but Kate could only hear the ringing and muffed sound. Mostly single syllables that made no sense to her.

And it didn't have to make sense because all she knew right now was pain. And she knew that all she had ever known was pain. So it was comforting for some reason.

The man was still screaming. She could feel and see it. Face red - eyes staring her down as he occasionally spat at her screaming while talking.

He was screaming about how she was going to die. Die alone with no one by her side. How everyone hated her. How everything is her fault.

And she just - laid there - and whimpered - trying to keep her eyes open to look at the man who was still squishing her ears between his palms.

If she was going to die then she better die watching someone instead of being alone.

Her body burning an agonizing pain.

And she wanted out. Right now. Away from here. From under this man. But she didn't know how and she didn't know where. Death just seemed to follow her.

She could only feel her heart pumping in her chest and stare at the dude before he put metal against her temple screaming into her other ear.

But all she heard was loud rustling like when someone called you while they were on a concert with the only difference that he was practically eating out her ear and pressing the gun to her temple - painfully digging it against her skull.

This was it Kate. This is how you die. Quite sad, actually. Dying a meaningless death. Just like her mother would tell her.

But before she even heard a click the man came crushing over her with a huff - a bullet digging through his scull - slicing it and leaving blood drip out of a hole.

And she stared at his eyes as they slowly lost their sparkle - laying under him - eyes wide brain going wild.

A man just fucking died on her. And she couldn't do anything. Just stare at the man - footsteps continued running around. Just stare at the image repeating in her brain - people continued to scream and shout.

Just stare.

Blank - empty - stare.

//No//

Chapter Text

In the one minute they were happily sitting on the couch - talking and joking and in the next they were watching Kate get beaten to the ground and kicked on - lying in a puddle of blood.

Lila had been thrown back into the van again by the time Laura ordered Cooper to take Nate and close the safe room.

There was not much she could do. A fair fight wasn't possible with armed men around them and it would also be a suicide mission - so she just gave up before even trying.

Not that she had another option either.

And to top that - not five minutes later - Cooper and Nate showed up too. Family gathering haha. Yea no real talk - if it weren't for Laura's emotional control skills - she would be screaming at the men and boiling over with worry because all of her kids were in the back of a van - one scared to death - one unconscious - and the other two just shocked - being driven off to god knows where - probably to die.

Clint on the other hand couldn't shut his mouth - he screamed at the driver - asked if everyone was ok every five minutes - practically scratched Kate's name whenever the kid moved only a little.

And this was bad - really bad.

It was supposed to be a field trip for Lila, Clint and Yelena to spend some time together. It was Coopers idea really - he probably wanted to have his peace and play video games.

The assassin, Hawkeye #2 and Lila then left leaving a barely healed Hawkeye, an ex-shield agent, a teenager and a baby home. Don't forget the dog.

And now they were in a van in the middle of nowhere - with their only hope of survival being an assassin that tried to kill one Hawkeye and was head-over-heels for the other Hawkeye. Great. At least she was good.

I mean - they tried to escape - but they had metal cuffs around their arms so didn't really work. Well until Kate woke up because of course that kid was a genius.

With half a concussion, a broken arm and vivid vision she cut open her ropes with a knife - she helped out the other kids and stayed behind fighting the tracksuits knowing that if she ran with them, they will get shot at and someone will 100% die.

Gotta give her the credit for being smarter than Clint. And more reckless. - That genius idiot.

But what stung most wasn't the pride she felt when Kate stood against those armed men she had little chance of winning against in her condition - or the fear that followed when her body hit the ground - but the pain when she apologized as a lone tear slid down her cheek. The fact that this stranger - this kid that Laura had practically adopted the second she stepped foot onto their front yard - called her mom in what to her was probably the last time they would see each other...

And they made her believe that. They made her believe Laura and Clint left her. They made her believe Laura would just go back home and leave her here scared and alone.

They threw her into that room - drugged her and made her question everything. Made her doubt everything.

While Laura and Clint struggled against the metal - behind a wall - watching everything. Every - single - thing and not being able to do anything.

It was cold-

And dark.

The room Kate was in was probably even colder and her head hung as the dude in there tried waking her.

She awoke. And then fell unconscious again. And then awoke. And fell unconscious again.

"What the hell are you doing?" Clint demanded from next to her. He was trashing around in his chair - scratching and squirming and to be honest she could see so many similarities between him and Kate.

"Oh come on. It's nothing she hasn't been trough." the man said and something cold started to boil up in Laura.

They were behind a one way mirror. Hearing everything the man said - watching every time he touched Kate.

And the way he prayed on her insecurities -

She's been through it? She's been through it? What did that mean?

"What the hell are you doing???? She's just a kid leave her alone!" Clint called again - his voice was hoarse from screeching like a pigeon all the time. And he didn't look like he would be stopping any time soon.

Pigeoneye would be a better name for him ngl.

Why were they doing this? What would they gain from this?

Laura's heart skipped a beat the second the needle sunk down Kate's neck and the kid went black-out again.

"Would you please just stop whatever bullshit this is?" Laura asked calmly

"I mean there really isn't a reason to torment a child you know. Unless you are some sadistic type of human."

"Well you gave yourself an answer." the man said

Neither of them watched when the man grabbed Kate - when he held her down - kissed her - touched her -

She just stared at the corner of the room - Clint boring holes into the tracksuits eyes as he continued screeching and screaming.

And it went on for hours and hours - until they grabbed Kate and threw her in the room with them and electrocuted the life out of her.

Of course Clint was screaming - Kate didn't seem to pick it up though. Laura tried to say something too but Kate didn't respond.

It all happened way too fast.

But all Laura could concentrate on was Kate.

Until bombs roared in the distance - smoke filled the room - someone hit the dude praying on Kate and undid the cuffs but the kid crashed to the ground next to the person that saved her.

And Laura could do nothing but watch.

And people were running around - the room started to fill up - more random people Laura could identify as shield agents - more tracksuits - well to be fair the room wasn't really small.

Clint got freed - tried to run over and help her - which didn't work - someone started attacking immediately - and by the time she got to look back at Kate there was another tracksuit over her with a fucking gun.

Yea. No one seemed to care about the literal child on the ground that laid there.

Until someone did. A redhead in a black suit and guns strapped around her waist.

A woman she thaught was dead. Shooting the guy over Kate. And she didn't know whether she should cry or laugh.

The redhead just kicked her way over - smashed in some heads broke some noses and finally appeared in front of her.

"Hey there." she said

"What the fuck?"

Chapter Text

No time for feels and hugs. 

There was an injured teenager in the middle of the battlefield - the target and they did not look good. 

Clicking off Laura's wrists out of the chains she grinned at the woman in front of her. 

"Hey there Luv." she said and moved over to smack her gun against the chains around Laura's ankles. 

"How -" 

"Yea yea. I am alive. I don't even know either. Just," she trailed off for a second "Isn't that child dying?" she asked but Laura's faecal expression didn't change much. A mix of shock and pain and some other bullshit Natasha didn't recognize or was imagining - until her head snapped to the kid on the floor - eyes going wide. 

"Laura." and she smacked the woman opposite of her in the face with a glove she pulled out of her pocket. 

"You've got new pants." 

Really Laura? That was the first thing you thought of? In a state of shock? Really? 

At least nothing really changed. 

"I think that kid there needs us." she said - Laura just nodded. 

No time for conversation though - so she stormed over to the kid on the ground - just - staring ahead. 

"Kid. Kid can you hear me?" She asked and shook her by the shoulders. 

The kid just cried out at the contact - tears spilling silently as she found Natascha's eyes. Or face. At least it was something. 

"Laura. I need you to hold her hand because this will hurt." she said and Laura - who was now next to her - looking the most mentally and physically drained she has ever seen her. 

"Then don't do it." Laura said - baffled by the fact that Natasha would willingly hurt someone as young as this child. 

Ignoring the last time Natasha tried killing a kid but ended up unintentionally creating one of the most deadly assassins. 

"Laura. She needs this - just - hold her hand," she said "Please." 

----

Laura watched as her best friend that perished on another planet years ago - grabbed a red stick out of her pocket - similar to an EPI pen and look at her. 

Something told her it was a bad idea. 

But all Laura could do was trust her. Maybe she wasn't Natasha. Maybe she was some weird hallucination but in this condition - Laura couldn't just grab Kate and run out. She couldn't even manage passing the mafia. 

"Just - be careful. Her right arm is broken." Laura said and shuffled over closer to Kate to hold the kid's hand.

Her kids hand. 

She didn't give a shit about blood and skin or all that bullshit. Kate was practically hers the second she stepped foot in their yard. 

She deserved a loving family. 

Laura didn't notice when Natasha stabbed Kate in the neck but she sure did notice the blood curling scream Kate let out. 

A red buzzing travelled over Kate pulling cry after cry and scream after scream while Laura's whole world shook. 

All she wanted to do was hold Kate - muff down the screams - stop the pain but all she could do was kneel next to the kid as her body trembled - a dark red ripping the ends of her sleeves. 

It felt like ages filled with painful cries - a couple of angry glances at Natasha who only returned guilt filled glances back until Kate jolted up with a heavy breath. 

And Laura was right there to catch her - 

As if positioned right there for a reason. 

Heavy breaths - sweat running down Kate’s forehead - she slowly wrapped Kate in her arms - trying to distance her from the world as best as she could - hide her - *protect her*. 

And with a shaky breath and a tiny voice Kate whispered "Mom." 

A voice filled with pain - dread and most importantly - fear. 

"It's okay baby. I'm here. Mom's here." instinct. Pure instinct - she has only felt once. 

The one time her little girl nearly got taken. 

A two-month year old - a baby - cried when a woman other than Natasha or her held her. 

The moment Clint and her decided they should keep their twins for a little longer than two months. Nothing bad could happen if they kept them for a bit longer - they could even raise them and have a family - for a while. 

Clint and her could get other jobs - safer jobs - live a nice life in a cottage in the woods or on a farm with a big lawn. 

But of course that wasn't possible - of course life got in the way - the world needed saving - the world need them more than their own little babies did when in the end of the day - after endless days and dreadful nights it turned out that - all Clint and her needed was their twins. All they needed was to wrap the fragile little things in blankets and make them hot coco and watch Pingu with them. 

But what their twins needed was safety and love. So they let them go and regretted doing so the minute they found out their twins had been separated. 

Laura doesn't remember what she did when she found out - the anger was too blinding. 

That day she decided that she will never let go of one of her kids - because she never forgave herself for what she did to her twins... 

And Kate curled her fingers around Laura's shirt hiding into it.

Like her little baby girl did when she was still with them. Now she is probably out there in the world thinking her parents abandoned her. 

There were no words spoken between Natasha and her - only an exchange of eye contact. 

"Shhh- it's okay Katie. I'm here. You're safe. Aunt Natasha and I are going to get you out of here okay?" and Kate just held onto her - eyes pressed shut and snivelling. 

You could let a needle fall and be able to hear it so quiet it was - which Laura was very thankful for. 

"Kit-Kat." Natasha finally spoke up, coming closer to touch the kid's shoulder and slowly grabbing her cheek to cherish it. 

"Listen to me." she turned Kate's face to look at her. 

"Breathe slowly. In and out. Deep breaths." and it was so clear that Kate was trying to listen to her. She really was - and it helped a little. A tiny bit. 

But the shimmer of red locking in Kate's eyes and slowly fading away made Laura's stomach twist in so many ways she didn't even know were possible. 

The red - as if taking the pain with it - fading away and out of existence but leaving its marks - like you'd expect. 

"Kate? I am Black Widow. Natasha Romanoff but you can call me whatever you want."  Natasha spoke.

"I'm going to tuck you into my jacket. It's really cosy and safe so that no one can hurt you and then Laura will pick you up and get you out of here. Far, far away and somewhere safe."