Chapter Text
Jess watched Carol as she scrolled through another file on her tablet, trying to fill in more gaps in her memory. Her face scrunch up in surprise as she read, which turned to a bemused cocksure Carol grin that slowly spread over her face.
“You’re country of birth is Wundagore,” Carol said to Jess as she looked up. “That cannot be a real thing.”
“You said you were reading Wolverine’s file,” Jess said as she scowled slightly. Carol had come back from space, and she should have just told her. Hell, she should have told her in the hospital, when Carol first lost her memories. But she wouldn’t have understood.
“I finished,” Carol said dismissively, bringing Jess back to the reality that it was really Carol sitting there.
“Yeah right,” Jess said. “It’s like eight times as long as everyone else’s, and I saw you doing a lot of very fast scrolling.”
“Maybe I’m a fast reader, Ms. PI,” Carol said. “Besides, I like this one better.”
“Carol, you already read my file,” Jess said as she felt an edge creep into her voice before she cut herself off. “Maybe you should read a file that’s useful?“
“I swear that there’s something in this that’s missing,” Carol said.
“But only a Jedi could have erased those files,” Jess said, rolling her eyes.
“Har de har har,” Carol said. “You’re the worst. You’re lucky I got to the important cultural references first.”
“Watching Star Wars was not important. Anyways, you seem pretty sure of yourself for someone who’s lost all of her memories,” Jess said. An awkward pause settled over the two of them.
“Jess, I’m sorry,” said Carol.
“What?” said Jess.
“For losing my memories. I know I did the right thing, but I wish that there was another way,” Carol said in a weary voice.
“There was,” Jess said icily. “Or did you forget that too?”
Carol looked like she had been slapped. “I’m sorry I care about New York getting destroyed.”
“I’m sorry you didn’t care about me,” Jess said.
“Listen, Jessica, I did what I thought was best. You think this is hard for you? I don’t remember anything. Nothing. I’m flying blind, and now the woman who was supposed to be my best friend is mad at me and I only have the faintest idea why,” Carol said.
“You left me, Carol, because you couldn’t stand not being in the limelight, and I wasn’t good enough,” Jess said, hands balling into fists. “And then you ran away to space. Why the hell wouldn’t I be mad?”
“I needed to find myself! You of all people should understand that,” Carol said as anger seeped into her. She liked the way it felt. She hated that, but feeling again felt good, like stretching unused muscles.
“Me of all people? Yes, I certainly understand being abandoned pretty damn well,” Jess said, raising her voice.
“Jess, I didn’t run away,” Carol said, starting to glow slightly. “In case you didn’t notice, I came back. I came back because I thought that maybe, just maybe, you wanted me to come back, and maybe I owed it to you. I don’t need this.”
“Carol, you never need this, and that’s the problem,” Jess said.
“I don’t even know what this is, why would I need this?” Carol spat.
“Because I don’t want to lose you like I lost…” Jess’s voice became hoarse and quiet. “Well, take your pick.”
“Jess. Jessica,” Carol said, touching Jess on the arm. “I am not going to leave you. I’m pretty sure I already care about you too much already.”
“I…” Jess said, feeling herself get lost in Carol’s eyes again before being reminded for the millionth time that Carol didn’t know her. Or did she catch a flicker in her eye… no. How could she? How could the most screwed over woman on earth really get that lucky twice?
“Jess, I just don’t understand,” Carol said. “I get being mad. But I left because I had to. I came back. Why are you acting like I took another girl to prom?”
“Because you kind of did,” Jess heard herself saying. Why did she say that? She tried desperately to shut up before…
“Jess, what do you mean?” Carol said, edging a bit closer.
Jess’s phone rang loudly.
“I need to take this,” Jessica said. “Can we talk about this later?”
“Yeah,” Carol said, crossing her arms and flicking her wrist in annoyance. “Yeah, sure. I’ll be flying around the tower. If you need me, come and get me.”
Jess nodded and took the call.