Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Nick Nelson is NOT perfect. He’s just lucky. Lucky to be born where and when he was. Lucky to be born who he was. Lucky to have the mom he does. Lucky to have a body and mind that developed in typical ways. Lucky to have a boyfriend he loves more than he ever knew was possible.

He’s been thinking and reading and researching a lot lately, typing “how to be a good partner to someone with OCD” into the search engine for instance. And it’s making him hyperaware of the many ways he is lucky.

Tonight he is lucky to have some private time with Charlie; Sarah is out late… on a date of her own! He wished her luck with a hug as she left and then swooped Charlie into his arms as soon as he arrived.

Now they’re in Nick’s room, making out in their favorite arrangement: Charlie is in Nick’s lap, his legs on either side of Nick who is leaning back on pillows against the headboard of his bed.

——

Charlie reared back from Nick’s lips suddenly, his hands jumping from the ruddy cheeks while they stare at each other, both trying to catch their breath. Blown out pupils, red swollen lips - they’d gotten proper bothered. After a silent beat, Charlie settled his hands lightly on Nick’s shoulders, closed his eyes, straightened his spine and began following some internal monologue to calm down.

Nick sat as still as he could and watched him regain some serenity, feeling the same peace wash over him as his delicious boyfriend used his new self-care techniques to manage his runaway passions and the subsequent anxiety. The therapy sessions Charlie was doing with Geoff had really been helping, in all areas of Charlie’s life, not just their make-out sessions.

Nick knew their increasing physical intimacy triggered a lot of Charlie’s insecurities around his body and he was happy to take it slow; he just wanted Charlie to feel safe and loved. When both of them were breathing normally, Charlie opened his eyes and then smiled widely, catching Nick’s soft look of adoration.

“Hi.”

“Hi.”

Their grins were goofy but they matched.

“Take a break?” Nick whispered. “Yeah, good idea,” Charlie replied, also in a hushed tone, and slid off Nick’s lap to sit next to him but closer to the wall. Nick opened his right arm and Charlie melted into his side for cuddles.

After a few beautiful minutes of just quiet happy vibrations along their skin and a few nuzzles, Nick took a deeper breath and eased out a few words, “So I’ve been thinking about how we might… you know…,” before his mouth stumbled to a halt. Charlie lifted his head and saw the blush rising up Nick’s cheeks so he sat up more fully and gave Nick his complete attention, putting all the trust and encouragement he felt into his eyes, hoping Nick would start up again and finish his thought.

Nick smiled a little tightly and shook out his shoulders a bit. “I’ve been thinking about… about how we could work on…going further but in a way that works for you!” The pauses became a rush of words. “I mean, I know we have to be careful about your control issues and I don’t want you to feel like I’m enabling you or something but it just seems like a good idea if you were more, I don’t know, in charge of guiding all this…” He saw Charlie was taking it all in and he gathered himself together again before continuing at a more sedate pace.

“Like, I think… people tend to think about sex like it’s all one or two acts but it’s not, is it? We’ve been kissing for ages and that’s all part of the journey too! We touch each other in ways that are NOT platonic! That counts!” Charlie’s face broke into a flirty smirk somewhere in there and Nick flushed again but was determined to keep going.

“Shut up,” he smiled into Charlie’s curls, pulling him close so he could think instead of getting distracted by how freaking cute his boyfriend was. “I mean, there are things that are a bigger deal; I’m not trying to pretend they’re not important. But… what if… we made it all into the tiniest of choices and what if… you got to pick some you felt ready to do and tell them to me… and then we just try one of them out for a while. I think… it might be really nice to just... I don’t know… focus on each step and REALLY enjoy it, you know?”

Charlie raised his head and looked thoughtfully into Nick’s eyes. “Like what?”

“Well, take kissing. It’s not really one thing either. We kiss all the time but we haven’t exactly shoved our tongues down each other’s throats because every time we even get close to exploring that, we… ummm… get really… worked up…” Charlie sat back a little and grinned at him again; it wasn’t fair how attractive he is.

Nick glanced down and cleared his throat. He would get this whole idea expressed, dammit! “So far, we’ve kissed with closed lips and open lips. We’ve… umm, chewed on each other’s lips. And we’ve… like… darted our tongue in…. SHUT UP! Stop leering at me, you horndog!”

Charlie bit down on his bottom lip, trying to look contrite, but his eyes continued to twinkle mischievously.

“Yeah ok, we’ve kissed each other’s necks and ears and… a little bit under our collars.” Nick’s cheeks were still red but he was almost visibly ticking off the points he wanted to make, leaning forward as he went. “AND! we’ve given each other hickeys which involves suction and biting! And… you bite my earlobes!” Charlie grinned again and Nick fell back, slightly chagrined by how much the smaller boy was enjoying this speech.

“So… that’s like… twelve things already just talking about kissing. And we like all of those things and I would be happy to keep doing those and the other stuff we’ve already done for as long as you want.” He took a breath and deliberately made eye contact with Charlie again. “Seriously. What we do now, already… it makes me really happy and I don’t ever NEED you to do more than you want to do… ok?”

Charlie’s expression had steadied already and he just silently nodded. Nick continued, “But if you wanted to… I thought it might be fun for you to use that overthinking brain of yours…,” he tilted his face down and then smirked up at him, “to come up with three or four new tiny choices you might want to try… They can be really small, like the biting the ears thing. But they can be bigger too. Then you tell me your list and I pick one, because we’re a team, and we…,” he shrugged, “we try it. We see if we like it. We explore… together… one tiny choice at a time… What do you think?” And then he finally stopped and just waited, watching the wheels turn in Charlie’s head.

It didn’t take very long at all before Charlie’s face lit up and he was practically shouting his enthusiastic response. “YES! That sounds amazing!” He followed up by throwing his arms around Nick a bit awkwardly and planting a big kiss on Nick’s smile.

Nick started to respond and deepen the kiss when Charlie sat back again. “Hold on, I want to finish saying out loud what we’re already doing. I need to… make sure I’m really getting this.” His striking brows pulled together, he was already a little lost in thought, ticking back through Nick’s list inside his head. “So… ummm… I gnaw on your earlobes,” he winked sideways at Nick as he said that bit but kept talking, “but it tickled when you tried it on me that one time and you haven’t done it again. Maybe we should test that more before crossing it off the list though.” He glanced up long enough to see Nick’s offhand agreement with that idea. “We’ve also kissed all over each other’s faces,” he pointed out and Nick nodded, one half of his mouth starting to quirk up at Charlie’s absorption in this process.

“I think that covers kissing. Hands.” As Charlie said that last word, he dropped his gaze to his hands where they were lying in the narrow space between their chests as they sat side by side but tilted towards each other. He rubbed his left thumb over the back of his right hand as the long fingers twisted together, rather elegantly Nick thought.

“I’ve put my hands all over your face and around the back of your head.” Charlie’s voice had fallen into a huskier tone and he dragged his eyes up to look straight into Nick’s through his eyelashes. Nick felt his breath hitch in his chest. How was this talk becoming erotic already?!

Charlie’s lips twitched at the corners and he continued, a little breathier, as the amorous twinkle rekindled in his eyes. “I’ve rubbed up and down your back. I’ve rubbed your arms. I’ve touched your chest some.” He swallowed now. “All on top of your clothes though.” He frowned a bit. “No, I’ve rubbed your arms and back without clothes too. But, like… doing sunscreen and it wasn’t… technically sexual.” He pulled his lips in, trying to suppress his smile after he said that last part.

Nick’s grin was somehow proud and shy at the same time. Charlie rolled his eyes and turned slightly away. “Ok back on it. Hmmmm. I touched your stomach that one time under your shirt but then I had to stop; I’ll keep that on the list for us to consider, not something we’re already really doing.” He glanced over his shoulder to catch Nick’s nod.

He tilted his head slightly. “I think you’ve really only done the same to me… except only above the clothes; is that right?” He leaned back and waited for Nick to think.

“Yeah.”

Nick’s breath stuttered on that tiny word a little so Charlie tipped his head again, asking without words for more information. Nick had started to blush again and he smiled, almost guilty for a second before shaking it off. “I was just remembering…,” he whispered, “what it feels like when you wear one of your button ups over a t-shirt and you let my hands go under the button up.” He licked his lips. “Ummm… I like that. A lot.”

He felt a rush of warmth thinking about his arms wrapping around Charlie’s waist at the beach, feeling the drag of the plaid fabric across the hairs on the back of his arms. Charlie had been warm for once, from laying in the sun. And Nick had burrowed his head into Charlie’s neck and felt pleasantly, lazily aroused at the time. Somehow it was more intense in his memory now, in this conversation he could already see was going to press so many of his buttons as they worked out all the tantalizing details.

Charlie just watched him walk down that memory lane, his mouth falling open in a gentle smile, almost disbelieving his power over this handsome boy. They both laughed, a little nervously, and felt the excitement thrumming under their skin. Charlie shook his head slightly. “Why are we like this?”

Nick’s smile burst onto his face. “Because we’re great.” Charlie grinned back and nodded. Then he leaned in and kissed Nick softly, lingering and tugging slightly on the other boy’s lower lip with his teeth before pulling back. “Is that everything we’ve done?” Nick half-shrugged, half-nodded. His eyes glanced down at Charlie’s lips and back up. He seemed… eager.

“Wot?”

“So… do you have any ideas you want to try?” Nick held his breath when the question left his mouth. Charlie blinked. Nick quickly shook his head a bit. “You don’t have to! We don’t have to add anything tonight!” Charlie smiled and shushed him gently.

“Oh! Yeah, give me a minute.” His smile curved into a full-on smirk as he sat back, one eyebrow bending up. The effect was breathtakingly frisky and Nick felt the thrum of excitement surge through him again. Tonight had been a whole rollercoaster, that was sure! He was so grateful Charlie liked his idea; this was going to be so much fun!

Charlie’s face went through a range of expressions; he ended up staring off towards the door for a while. Nick just leaned against his side and enjoyed the sight of his beautiful boyfriend thinking deep and naughty thoughts, if those expressions chasing each other across his face were any indication.

Then Charlie’s smirk returned, stronger than before, and he turned his torso back towards Nick, causing him sit up so they could resume their earlier position, curving towards each other. Charlie wobbled his head a bit as his eyes drifted to Nick’s parted lips and back up, considering his first volley and still smirking.

“Question first.” Nick blinked and then nodded impatiently. Charlie’s lustful smile just got wider. “I get to say some options of things I do to you or you do to me without it always being both at the same time, right?” Nick considered a moment and then nodded again, already impressed by the way Charlie’s brilliant mind broke things up into logical units.

“Okay good because that will help me get more comfortable with some stuff if I can do it to you for a while first before you do it to me.” Nick’s head snapped back a bit at that concept; he’d had no inkling that reciprocity was one of the unspoken expectations making Charlie struggle.

Charlie took a deep breath and then held up his right hand in front of Nick’s face, palm facing himself. Most of his fingers dropped, leaving just his index still pointing up and the back of his hand temptingly close to Nick’s mouth. “First option: I get to touch you anywhere I want under your shirt.” His eyes were drilling a hole through Nick’s soul; he felt his chest stop moving as he saw desire sweep up Charlie’s lean frame.

Charlie rolled his lips and raised the next finger. “Second option: you get to grab my ass on top of my clothes.” The cheeky smirk was back. Nick returned it, his eyes crinkling nearly closed. This whole thing was going better than he ever dreamed.

Charlie raised his ring finger and Nick was briefly distracted again by how strong yet delicate his hands were but his gaze quickly locked back onto Charlie’s as the tension between them resurfaced. “Third option: we both get to start kissing…,” Charlie bent his head towards Nick slightly as his voice slowed and thickened, “and nibbling and… sucking… on each other’s hands, fingers… up to the wrists anyway…,” he trailed off as Nick visibly swallowed over a big lump in his throat.

Nick blinked and his mouth fell open slightly. “Hot,” he managed to gasp out. Charlie just looked at his mouth as his hand started to drift down slowly. Nick snatched it out of the air before it could hit Charlie’s lap, taking it between his own. He stared at it and tried to breathe normally but it was a losing battle. He swallowed again and managed to make eye contact.

“I want them all,” he sheepishly admitted and was rewarded with a sigh of relief and a broad smile. He took a deeper breath and continued before he lost the thread completely again. “But tonight, let’s add that last one and just that last one because…,” he swallowed again, self-consciously now, “because… I will combust, I think…”

Charlie’s face was all joy and enthusiasm. He began to nod and then something flashed in his eyes.

“What is it, love?” Nick brought Charlie’s hand up and gave the back of it a chaste kiss. Charlie smiled and voiced his thought, “So we just… revisit the other options some other time, right? No pressure…,” Nick brought his right hand up to cup Charlie’s face and wordlessly nodded, putting his whole heart into his eyes. “And we can still stop any of the things at any time… when we need to slow it down or back it up…?” Charlie’s concerns emerged carefully and every single one got another reassuring nod from Nick. Both of them sat in the quiet a moment and their shoulders unclenched as they traded soft looks full of feeling.

Charlie closed the distance between them with a kiss which was firm and confident but short. Their hands were still entwined but had dropped out of the way. Nick brought them back up and spread Charlie’s between both of his, turning it to look at it from different angles. Charlie settled back, his bottom lip between his teeth.

Nick turned Charlie’s hand so his palm came up against his own face, just to the side of his open mouth; he closed his eyes a moment and had trouble catching his breath yet again. He was still holding the hand there with his own so he could draw it back slightly as his chin angled and he dove his mouth straight into the center of the palm with a fierce kiss which ended with him raking the front of his teeth across the full width, all while hearing Charlie’s gasps. He pulled the meaty base under the thumb into his mouth and gently bit down; somehow this felt absolutely RIGHT instead of weird and he moaned with his mouth full of his boyfriend’s flesh. He heard Charlie’s breath speed up but he couldn’t drag his attention away from what he was doing, moving on pure instinct.

He pulled back just enough to let his lips glide over the skin and he breathed in Charlie’s scent. Then the tip of his tongue poked out and he found himself dragging it up the length of Charlie’s thumb where he… just… wrapped his mouth completely around it and found the broad pad reflexively pushing hard against his tongue while both boys let out enormous groans and bent forward over the sudden heat spike in their groins.

Without thinking, Nick immediately suctioned around the digit and he could feel the eyes rolling back in his own head AND Charlie’s too somehow. Their foreheads were almost touching now, offset slightly, and Nick popped off Charlie’s hand only so he could turn and crash his mouth into the other’s, desperate and hungry. Their lips were wide open and it was somehow full of teeth almost clashing and tongues hovering ready for more.

Hands fell apart and found new homes pulling their bodies closer and closer until they were completely smashed together, lips turning and turning and turning until it was unbearable and they fell back once more, both panting wildly.

Nick’s eyes fleetingly found Charlie’s before he fell into the side of his neck and tried to remember how to be in his own body. Charlie wrapped his arms tightly around his back and started giggling, still breathless. After a minute or two, they could relax slightly and pull back enough to meet each other’s eyes again. Both began beaming at the same time.

Charlie’s smile became his trademark smirk soon enough. “We’re off to a good start with your little idea.” Nick nodded vigorously, eyes starting to well up as he realized, for the millionth time, how much he loved this complex, wonderful boy. He is so so lucky.

Chapter Text

It started in the photo booth where they were recreating the lap-sit pose because… well, they wanted to. Simple kisses became more when the camera stopped clicking and flashing. Hands were roaming. Charlie’s were under Nick’s shirt. Nick’s were on Charlie’s jeans cupping his ass and smashing his body closer. Mouths were open and tongues were darting here and there.

Finally Charlie pulled back, becoming aware of how little the curtain was doing to hide their activities from the other tourists. He bent his forehead down to meet Nick’s, closed his eyes and started his calming breath exercise. Nick panted quietly, just holding him and trying to match the effects.

After a minute, he was still uncomfortable and could not help himself from wiggling a little. Charlie’s eyes shot open and he exclaimed, “NICK! What was that for?!” But as soon as he caught sight of Nick’s guilty expression, he realized it was unintentional and he pressed a mild kiss against Nick’s temple as an apology for assuming.

“Sorry, Char. I just… my shorts are,” he glanced up and Charlie was struck again by the beauty of his eyes, his skin, his eyelashes before the words broke through his reverie and he realized Nick’s predicament.

“Oh! Ummmm… Ohhhh…,” Now it was Charlie’s turn to wiggle unintentionally, noticing how his pants just got tighter again too. “Yeah umm… so… normally I would go to the loo now but…,” he glanced back at the curtain again, “but maybe not a public one for THAT…”

Nick chuckled and shook his head. “Yeah, and this is not my bedroom and we don’t have privacy anywhere nearby to… y’know… take care of things the way we’re used to so…” Charlie’s face went wide and mocking, “Guess we’ll just have to suffer!” He smirked into Nick’s face and planted another kiss on his lips for a moment.

Then he stood and adjusted and indicated Nick should do the same; when Nick did, he took the taller boy’s shoulders gently and pushed to turn him around. Then he turned so they were now back to back, still inside the booth. “Ok, breathe with me, big boy.”

“Wot?! Don’t call me that when you want me to calm down, you wanker!” Nick sputtered. Charlie just giggled and it honestly did help. After another minute, they were able to exit the booth without incident.

But later they had to spend several difficult moments pressing themselves belly-down into the pebbles of the beach and looking away from each other, having rolled off their conjoined towels where they’d indulged their passions once more. Charlie knew he had to concentrate on his breathing instead of chasing what friction the shoreline provided. He cleared his throat loudly and risked a glance at his gorgeous boyfriend.

Nick was resting his head on his forearms tucked neatly in front of him. He was already smiling calmly in Charlie’s direction. The younger boy was a little jealous… He caught himself before he could spiral all the way into the dark thoughts of being undesirable. He had felt PROOF to the contrary many times by now.

But they had yet to relieve the… situation together. Too scary, that shadowy voice insisted. Losing control like that…

Charlie cast his mind away from that line of thought and remembered the day they’d first acknowledged the… situation, back in the spring soon after Nick had introduced the idea of moving one tiny choice at a time through the beginning of their sex life.

———————-

At the park walking Nellie, they’d paused under a low-hanging tree and hugged and gently kissed in the pseudo-privacy. Despite the pleasant sensations, something in Charlie’s brain was busy cataloging and comparing every act of intimacy against the mental master list Nick had recently started of “tiny choices”. Was this something they’d done? Something they’d agreed to try? Something Charlie had named but Nick hadn’t picked yet? Something he hadn’t even named yet?

And he frowned.

Nick pulled his head back instantly. “What is it, love?”

Charlie blinked. “Sor… Hrmmm. I mean, I just realized…” He leaned his torso back and looked down. Nick followed his gaze. They had been pressed together from shoulder to toes, feet alternating along the same line in order to bring their legs into more perfect contact. From the waist down, they still were pressed together.

Charlie’s face scrunched like he had tasted something bitter. “We forgot a whole section of the list!” Nick just blinked at him, wide hands sinking into the shorter boy’s shoulders as he waited for clarification. “We talked about kisses and hands and stuff but…,” Charlie’s eyes dropped once more towards their navels, only a few centimeters apart.

Nick’s mouth formed a large O and he stepped back immediately, leaving only his hands touching Charlie now. Charlie quickly shook his head and stepped forward just enough to restore the previous amount of connection. “No! I like it. I like…,” he swallowed and rocked his hips slightly from side to side, “this.” Nick grinned and flushed simultaneously.

“Oh okay. Good. Yeah! Good.” He shook his head and crushed his boyfriend back to his chest, burying his nose in Charlie’s neck to hide his red cheeks. They both giggled a little breathlessly as a heightened awareness crept over them of just how much of their bodies were touching. After a moment, Nick raised his head and said quietly, “Char? … Honey… You’ve stopped breathing, love…” His face started to turn towards the other but Charlie inhaled sharply and tightened his arms around Nick’s torso, locking him into place.

“Mmmmm.” He had sucked his lips into his mouth, trying not to THINK about what they were doing quite so much. When his body betrayed him [as usual… came a dark hiss] and TWITCHED below his belt… it sent him flying back a few clumsy steps but not before he registered a responding twitch…

Turning desperately away, he saw Nellie next to them happily resting under the tree and he sank gratefully down to her to distract himself petting her. “Whooozagoodgirl yesyouareyesyouareagoodgirl.”

Behind him, he could sense Nick just settling back on his heels, patient and calm. He breathed deep and stood up. They both smiled a little shyly at each other. Nick held out his free hand, the leash in the other, and indicated they should circle back to his house with a jut of his chin. Charlie silently nodded and they strolled home, easy again together but quiet.

Later after eating, settling into a cuddle on top of Nick’s bed, they mostly ignored a movie on his laptop, both drowsy and enjoying the feeling of leaning into each other, more or less side by side. Nick chose his moment carefully, shifting up in order to wrap one arm behind the other boy and pull him closer. His other arm snaked up so he could run that hand through Charlie’s hair.

“You were right earlier,” he said softly. Charlie hummed a question mark at him, tilting his face up and receiving a quick peck for his troubles. They both smiled again before Nick continued, “You were right about us forgetting a section of the list.” Nick paused and shook his head a little ruefully. “Trust you to have that list constantly going in your head now, amirite?” Charlie tried to look innocent but Nick just chuckled. “I hope you’re having fun with it at least.” He raised his eyebrows and Charlie smirked and nodded. Nick relaxed and returned to stroking through the unruly curls.

“So I don’t know how to… talk about that section without,” he cleared his throat, “heating us both up.” It had sounded like he meant to say more but the sentence just cut off as his eyes got wide. Charlie sat up more.

“Nick? Are you ok?”

Now it was Nick’s turn to try to look innocent but the deep flush swirling up his neck and face gave that the lie. Charlie’s smile pulled sideways and his eyes began to dance merrily. “Nick! What is it?”

Nick’s whole face contracted as he built up the nerve to admit, “Dirty talk is a whole section too… in case you hadn’t thought of that yet…”

Charlie fell back, hooting with delight. “Oh! Yes! Yes, it is! Oh my God, Nick, your face!” They ended up laughing so hard, they bent over into the small space currently between them.

After a bit, they shook that off and settled back into an affectionate position. Nick gave a great big sigh and closed his eyes. “Where was I? Oh. Yeah.” He sighed again. “I mean… I know the proper word for… part of it… but it’s pretty specific to a certain… act… and I’m not sure it counts when we’re just hugging and fully dressed and… WHAT?!” Somewhere in this ramble, Charlie had bounced away yet again, his mouth and eyes wide open.

“Nicholas Nelson, are you talking about what I think you’re talking about?!?! Where did you learn that word?!” Nick smirked and crossed his arms.

“What! I do my research!”

Charlie swatted at him, laughing. “Research?!” he squawked out. “Is that what you’re calling it?!”

Nick sputtered defensively. “Yes! Because it is!” Charlie shook his head in disbelief but settled in to listen as Nick opened his mouth to explain more. “I mean… it’s FUN to learn this stuff, I’m not gonna lie, but I do… yeah, research it, Charles Spring.” The dark-haired boy just smiled softly and blinked, still confused.

“I want…,” Nick shifted nervously. “I want to know how…,” He frowned, arms still crossed, and shook himself slightly. “I want to know how to please you, Charlie.” His eyes came up and his face was pure tenderness now. “I want to know how men love each other because we don’t… just SEE it around us all the time, y’know?” Nick threw his hands into the air at that part and then shrunk back, arms flopping to his sides.

“Awwww, Nick,” Charlie’s voice was feather-soft and he slid forward to hold his precious boyfriend. Nick nuzzled into Charlie’s neck and felt all the muscles he’d been clenching in his back let go. They stayed there a few minutes, just breathing and feeling the love between them.

Charlie’s brain was still doing its thing, behind the scenes so to speak, and he broke the silence with a simple declaration, “We’re going to call that section Pants.”

Nick snorted. He looked a question up into Charlie’s eyes. Charlie was smiling widely by now but he nodded firmly and got Nick to slip back into place. “Yes. Pants. As in, what we’re already doing includes rubbing our Pants Areas together sometimes but all clothes on so far.” Nick’s breath against his neck caught a little at that but Charlie soldiered on, “and not… so much that we… finish.” They both swallowed and got quiet.

“Okay,” Nick whispered across Charlie’s Adam’s apple. “Ummm, my… pants area… is starting to really like this talk…” Charlie chuckled softly and tilted Nick’s face up for a gentle kiss. But when he pulled back, Nick sat up and took both his hands into his own. He took a deep breath and looked into Charlie’s eyes directly.

“I am totally happy to wait until you’re completely ready to… finish with… um, in front of… because of me?” He smiled ruefully but Charlie let him keep going. “I just… wonder… what we want to do in the meantime when… the breathing exercise doesn’t work because… sometimes it doesn’t… for one or both of us and last week you rushed home and I know we kinda just didn’t talk about that but I did not like it, ending the evening that way! Not that I’m mad about it! I just… want another option maybe?”

The words had tumbled and spilled out like a river in flood. Nick took a deep breath and tried to still himself. He could see Charlie taking it all in and churn it around the beautiful machine of his mind.

“What if,” Charlie started and stopped again almost immediately. He shifted and began to stare at Nick’s lips. He licked his own and began again. “What if… I went to the loo and… took care of it, is that gross?” Nick was quick to shake his head no. “Okay and you stayed here and… took care of you. I mean, we just say we need a bigger break and then we… do that and we can… I don’t know, reset afterwards however we want.” He shrugged. “Does that work? We can try it, yeah?”

“Yeah,” Nick smiled contentedly. And then he pounced on the smaller boy, pulling him in tight and planting a giant kiss on him. Charlie’s gasp was quickly cut off but he responded soon enough with desperate hands and lips and tongue of his own.

—————-

But here they were now on the beach with no place private enough for… relief and all the usual raging hormones. Charlie gave a big sigh and Nick’s eyebrows quirked in concern. “Wot?”

Charlie could sit up now without embarrassment so he did, Nick quickly matching movements until they were comfortably next to each other back in the middle of the towels, flanks and thighs gently creating safe amounts of friction.

Charlie leaned forward and picked up a few pebbles to roll around while he tried to get his thoughts out. His eyes drifted up to the horizon and then stuck there. “I was thinking about our… Pants Relief Strategy.” His lips twitched up at the corners as he felt Nick’s grin forming just out of his peripheral vision. He shrugged. “I mean, it’s been working fine for months now but…,” his voice became a whisper, “I don’t know how to… move on from there.”

His neck suddenly felt too weak and his head flopped down as his body started to contract. Nick was quick to wrap his arms about the lean torso of his beloved. “No, no, none of that! That voice is lying! There is nothing wrong with you! You don’t have to be ready! I promise!”

Charlie twisted gratefully into both the hug and the words but pulled back to respond, “But that’s just it! I want to be ready! I love you so much and…,” he swallowed thickly, “I want you… so much.” He stilled and they just looked at each other, all the nerves and affection playing across their faces all at once.

Nick’s head started to tilt and his hands rubbed reassuringly up and down Charlie’s arms. “I know Geoff liked our tiny choices plan but remind me what he said about it and your control issues,” he entreated mildly.

“Oh,” Charlie blinked. “Yeah. He liked it was mutual, because I suggest but you pick, and he liked that it gets me expressing my wants or my boundaries or whatever but… it doesn’t actually make my OCD go away,” his hands were slightly twisting inbetween them, “so there’s that. I mean, this is my brain… for life…” His eyes glanced to the side as he did that tiny sideways jerk of his head that Nick had learned would almost always accompany Charlie admitting a difficult truth.

He closed his arms slowly around Charlie’s shoulder blades, drawing the smaller boy into his chest as best he could. He mumbled into Charlie’s neck, “I love your brain. It is a very cool brain.” When Charlie scoffed under his breath, he added, “Complicated! But very very cool.” He made every movement as comforting as he could. Finally he felt Charlie relax into his embrace. After some time like this, they pulled back into the side-by-side position from earlier.

Their eyes resting back on the horizon, they let the quiet ease which was their default atmosphere take its shape around them there.

“Nick?”

“Hmmmm?”

“I think I need you to take charge of that part.”

“Waddaya mean, love?”

Charlie sighed and closed his eyes, shutting out the view which was starting to promise a lovely sunset soon. His forehead dropped and he self-consciously rubbed his hands over his knees where they had been resting. “I don’t see how to get… out of my own way… so I want your help…” His face scrunched as it tilted and he looked at his boyfriend with a vexed expression.

“Anything, Charlie; you know that. Come here.”

They both turned their bodies and ended up legs and arms jumbled and wrapped around each other. Charlie soaked up Nick’s warmth, his smell, the bliss of touching the boy he loved. He swallowed, his chin hooked on one of Nick’s shoulders, and haltingly made his request into the empty air centimetres away from Nick’s ear.

“I want you to plan something where you… make me… ermmm… you know…,” He sighed. “And it needs to be something of a surprise even though I’m asking you to do this so I know it’s a big ask but I guess that means more than one plan so I don’t know exactly when it’s gonna happen…,” He gave himself a tiny shake and closed his eyes. “I want you to… use your hands or just friction though; I’m not ready for more than that still.” He felt Nick nodding. He steeled himself again. “I want you to be… really in charge… when it’s time… like… just go for it without too much checking in because I have to… not be thinking so much… just feeling you… taking over. So I can let go…” He gave up and crumpled his face into Nick’s chest, nearly in tears and fighting off the dark spots threatening to take over his field of vision.

“Hey! Hey, shuuuuuuush. I got you, babe. It’s okay. That all sounds fine; I can do that. You’re okay.” Nick’s voice and hands were nothing but soothing.

Charlie pulled away and looked into Nick’s eyes, relieved not only by the other’s reaction but also his own success at expressing the idea without a total breakdown. “You can do that?” Nick pulled in his lips and gave the smaller boy a look of disbelief. “It’s not too much?”

Nick’s face exploded into a grin all at once. “My proper fit boyfriend just gave me permission to not only plan several fun dates but also,” Nick’s eyebrows began to waggle suggestively as he over-enunciated the next word dramatically, “dom-min-nate him and give him an orgasm for the first time in my life, do I have that right?” Charlie blinked, a surprised smile spreading itself across his face. He hummed his agreement. “Um, that sounds INCREDIBLE, thankyouverymuch!!”

They both pulled slightly back, laughing fondly into each other’s face. Nick’s hands found their way to the back of Charlie’s head and started to knead the muscles at the base of his neck as their foreheads met. “Anything else you need me to know about it right now, Char?”

“Hmmmm. It might be best if it takes a while so I almost… forget about it?” Nick huffed a little at that. “I know I won’t really be able to!” Charlie shrugged. “I just… this will be difficult enough…” He paused and shook himself slightly. “No, I am going to trust you and focus on enjoying all the other things we do and we’ll keep working on the list bit by bit and it will be just fine!” He jerked his chin down emphatically on the last phrase. He took a deep breath, smiled and glanced up through his eyelashes; Nick felt the air catch in his throat.

Charlie’s smile got even brighter, even more beautiful, and he leaned up to press it against Nick’s jaw. “This is going to be good. Just like now is good. I can be right here now, with you, having this good day.”

Chapter Text

Strategizing how to get your boyfriend off has something in common with strategizing in rugby: Nick started with the goal in mind and worked backwards from there. What would make Charlie feel safest and able to drop the mental defenses working against his own desires?

Well for one, Charlie had decided it can’t be his brain making this plan or even helping make it. Which had Nick somewhat lost, if he’s honest. He couldn’t go to any of their mutuals for help either; that would disclose too much about their private time.

So back to the internet he went! Luckily he had found some healthier corners during his previous research. Sites like Scarleteen helped him find communities and forums where he could learn without getting overwhelmed.

But ultimately it was his job to apply what he learned to what he knew about Charlie’s needs and what he himself wanted. He had accepted this task without too much thought but, even after circling it several times intellectually and emotionally, he was still willing to take on the responsibility.

What would make Charlie feel safest? Privacy. Not worrying about who might see or who might hear or who might walk in.

Nick crossed Charlie’s house off the list of potential locations immediately; they never did much intimate stuff there anyway. “Hanky panky,” Charlie’s dad had cringingly called it… and forbidden it.

His own bed? Charlie certainly felt safe there. Nick’s mum was lovely and often left them home alone. But what if something did not go well? Nick didn’t want that memory marring every other interaction they had in his own room!

Ok. Nick reviewed his options, crossing most off due to privacy challenges or expense. Some locations he put aside for the fun pseudo-attempts Charlie wanted him to also plan; he thought of those as just like a rugby fake-out when he was running in a try. He already knew he would have to be careful, balancing the elements of surprise and trust and anticipation.

What else would help Charlie feel safe? Based on his request, apparently he theorized it would help turn off his challenging thought patterns if he was submissive in this act, at least for the first time. It was counter-intuitive but Nick had faith in Charlie’s recovery so he moved ahead with his planning around that.

When he let himself think about and research the dominance part, Nick was astonished to observe the intense physical reaction he had. He WANTED to try this! He really had to sit and sort out his feelings about that one; did it mean he actually was just another stereotypically awful rugby lad?! But some anonymous Q&As online allayed his fears.

Dom/sub relations were a whole wide playing field of their own. Charlie had not asked for anything permanent nor comprehensive. They could explore this area one tiny choice at a time too. Hidden in the back of Nick’s mind, never yet put into words, was the rock-solid belief that they had the rest of their lives to learn all this together.

————

The first time Nick tried out acting more dominant, they had borrowed his mum’s car, gotten some takeaway and found a secluded parking spot to eat slowly and then make out when it got fully dark. Nick had just leaned over and started kissing Charlie rather urgently, without the usual signals.

Charlie responded enthusiastically so Nick grabbed the back of his head and pulled Charlie a little forcefully to one side so he could clamp down on the side of his neck right where it became his shoulder; he found himself growling and then his teeth were sinking in… deeper than usual. He was gratified to hear Charlie moaning louder than he’d ever heard up to that point. He released and licked the sting away before pulling back just enough to make intense eye contact and snarl, “back seat! now!” at his panting boyfriend. Charlie gulped and nodded and turned to fumble with the door behind him.

Nick’s trousers were already too tight so it was awkward transitioning into the new space but they managed. Once both back doors were closed and locked, he yanked Charlie close to him and resumed chewing on his neck. His hands were rubbing and kneading the smaller boy’s ass and Charlie’s head was fully thrown back as his ragged breathing fogged the windows.

After working several love bites into both sides of Charlie’s neck and noticing how loose, nay pliant, the other felt in his arms, Nick pulled back and took a minute to lift his beloved into his lap. This meant Charlie was bent forward to keep his head from denting into the roof of the car. Nick slumped down and just held him as they settled their breathing into a synced rhythm.

Cradling Charlie like this, Nick felt the mood shift and he softly inquired, “that good for tonight?” Charlie nuzzled his ear like a sleepy kitten, humming his approval. “Ordering you around, that worked?” Another enthusiastic hum-nod. Nick felt his stomach relax for the first time in a while; he smiled. “Can I ask a question about this… plan or will that be a problem?” Charlie stilled and then nodded again. “Are you sure?” A stronger nod. “Do I have your… consent to use my hands… on your Pants Area.. clothes on! … before we get to the final stage or should I wait until that time?”

Charlie breathed calmly into Nick’s temple for a minute. “You can…,” he began, “I mean, you do… Just make sure there’s somewhere I can go for Pants Relief right after.”

Nick nodded slowly. “What works for you for that? Besides the loo at my house,” he smirked. Charlie lightly swatted his chest for that but then shrugged. “Ok, will you tell me later if you think of anything?” Charlie nodded and they settled back into peaceful silence for a while.

————

Nick and Charlie, Charlie and Nick. They go to school. They do their revisions. They eat with their families. They have movie nights with their friends. They take their tests and stress about the outcomes. They do chores and play rugby and talk about little nothings and live a whole life, with plenty of affection and heat mixed in. Charlie goes to therapy. Nick plans.

————-

The second time, they had ridden the train into the city and walked through the cold over to an art museum; Truham was on winter break so it was a weekday and the museum was mostly empty. Nick was not entirely surprised to learn Charlie knew way more than he did about art and art history; they strolled from room to room as he happily listened to his boyfriend’s chatter.

They ate a small lunch in the museum cafe, slowly savoring their time together. Charlie mentioned he needed the loo and they found it in the back of the quiet dining room. Nick was at the sinks first and he nodded at himself in the mirror, heart beginning to race.

He turned and tried to look casual leaning one hip against the counter, off to one side. Charlie was soon there and started chattering again as he washed up but something in Nick’s energy alerted and silenced him. As he dried his hands, his face swung back and forth a bit as he tried to elicit some kind of verbal response. “Wot?”

Nick just slid closer to him, maintaining an amount of eye contact which felt almost invasive. Charlie turned back to throw the paper towel away and, just like that, the front of Nick’s entire body collided with his left side. “What are you DOING, you creeper?!” Charlie protested.

Nick felt a piece of his heart shrivel up at that but he was committed to the role he’d adopted by now. His right hand pressed into the small of Charlie’s back. His left arm shot up, bending at the elbow which lifted dramatically as his hand turned sideways and covered the smaller boy’s mouth. If they had been living in a crime drama, this would have been the part where Nick dosed Charlie with chloroform and shoved him into a getaway van.

Charlie’s eyes got so wide, Nick could see the whites all the way around, their faces millimetres apart. But Charlie didn’t pull back nor struggle nor give any other indication Nick needed to stop. Once the younger boy had completely stilled within the vise grip of the rugby star, Nick brought his right index finger up to his pursed lips. Charlie just nodded.

Nick dropped his right arm down to guide Charlie’s hips as his left hand dipped under the other’s jaw and wrapped around his throat, lightly pushing on his windpipe in order to push Charlie into the nearest stall. His movements were small but decisive; he mostly got it right with the amount of pressure it took to convince the Converse-covered feet to move where he wanted.

Once they were both inside, he had to drop all contact in order to secure the door. Behind him, he heard Charlie scootching into one corner, one of the very corners Nick had been scouting for cleanliness not ten minutes earlier. “Nick? Wha…?”

Nick spun as fast as he could and quelled Charlie quite effectively with a forceful shush, wearing a smile which was somehow fond yet arrogant at the same time. Charlie opened and closed his mouth, a little glassy-eyed. Nick closed the distance between them in a flash, hips nudging hips up against the wall, hands finding hands and pulling them down with a sharp snap, locking arms into place.

Then Nick just… nosed the air between them. Charlie could see the nostrils flaring as Nick’s face swayed hypnotically back and forth, eyes half-lidded. Soaking in Charlie’s smells.

Without saying a word, Nick ran the tip of his nose along Charlie’s left jaw towards his mouth. Then his head came up and his eyes were full of fire before he… fell into kissing Charlie. His whole body …pushed at the smaller frame, wanting… just wanting more, deeper, harder. The kisses quickly became greedy, demanding. Charlie melted under the onslaught.

Nick’s left hand untangled and came up to hold the back of Charlie’s head firmly in place as his mouth drifted to Charlie’s right temple where he started… licking down Charlie’s neck in obscenely wide, wet strokes. At the same time, his right hand pushed Charlie’s left shoulder back even more and then brushed across Charlie’s left nipple, eliciting shudders across the boy’s entire frame.

That hand then slid down Charlie’s left flank, rubbing and kneading the flesh, until it flattened, fingers pointed down, against his left hip. Nick pulled back from Charlie’s neck and looked into his face. His right hand crawled sideways until he was cupping Charlie’s bulge in his palm.

Everything in Charlie’s face just… intensified somehow. Nick’s hand dipped down, his fingers finding the bottom of the bulge and hooking under a moment, before he slid it back up. Charlie’s mouth was a wide oval, his head started to fall forward but then, Nick saw it, the eyes darted towards the sinks and the door beyond them.

The taller boy gave Charlie’s bulge a gentle squeeze as he planted a simple kiss on his forehead. “Mmmm, you take care of this,” another squeeze, “and I’ll make sure nobody interrupts you.” With that, he was gone, banging out one door and then the next, halting his momentum only when he saw the corner of the dining room.

He turned back towards the door and crouched down in front of it to hide his own bulge. He pretended to fumble with his shoelaces but mostly he was catching his breath and reviewing what had happened.

After a couple of minutes, the door opened and he quickly stood; the boys caught each other’s elbows and tried to read each other’s expressions. Charlie looked… chagrined yet satisfied? Affectionate and happy, yeah. Nick’s smile was all sloppy relief.

Charlie jutted his chin behind him. “Your turn?”

Nick shook his head. “Nah, I’m okay.” His eyes dropped and slowly came back up. “Was that all right?” he asked shyly. Charlie grinned and nodded and took his arm to firmly walk them back out into the lobby.

———

[approximately ten years later]

The couple has been slowly walking around the galleries hand in hand. The taller, bearded man keeps smiling broadly into the other’s face and saying things like, “I can’t believe you remembered this place! What a lovely date, thank you, darling.”

The smaller man smiles back and nods every time until he stops them in the corner near the cafe. “Nick?”

Chest to chest now, the other just nods and hums back. “You know that show we loved, from the other night? With the Mexican boyfriends at the art museum? Do you want me to…?” Charlie’s face is coy and getting bolder; as his voice trails off, he leaves his mouth hanging open and his tongue tip curls suggestively in the corner of his lips. The light dawns in Nick’s eyes and he delightedly drags Charlie through the dining room and into the bathroom beyond.

Chapter Text

Charlie had his suspicions. Why did Nick want to see THIS film? At this time of night? Why did he insist on sitting in the top row of the cinema, at the far end of the row? Mentally he shrugged and went with the flow.

Twenty minutes into the movie, he was already bored. He glanced over at his handsome boyfriend only to find Nick’s eyes focused downward, lost in thought. Softly he bumped his shoulder into the other.

Nick’s face was… embarrassed…? “Hey, you’re a dork and this film is shite. Are you okay?” Charlie quietly teased. Nick smiled affectionately in his direction but flushed even deeper. His eyes darted over to the only other patron who had braved the showing.

Charlie followed his line of sight and blinked. “Oh… Oh! You meant for us to be alone, hunh?” Nick scrunched his mouth sideways and nodded sheepishly. Charlie smirked. “So…,” he brought one hand up to trail his fingernails along Nick’s forearm, “what did you have in mind?” he asked liltingly.

Nick’s eyebrows went up and he twisted his torso to face Charlie more fully. “You’re still up for something?! Even with…,” he jerked a thumb over his shoulder. Charlie made a non-committal noise and turned to study the other guest more carefully.

It appeared to be a middle-aged man he didn’t know. And avidly watching the screen. At nearly the opposite corner of the entire bank of seating.

Charlie turned back to Nick’s expectant, wide-open face. He smiled and nodded, a little giggle escaping him when the other boy lit up. They both leaned forward at the same time and started making out, first soft kisses and then building, building to something rather urgent.

Charlie pulled back and started breathing more deliberately with his mouth forming a small circle. Nick’s eyes did not leave Charlie’s bee-stung lips. Charlie watched those two tiny vertical lines between Nick’s brows come and go a handful of times while he got his Pants Area under control.

Then Nick licked his lips and raised his eyes to Charlie’s; something rippled over his face, something… fierce? It made Charlie’s groin start to coil all over again, seeing that look.

Nick’s hand came up and wrapped itself around the back of Charlie’s head in a way he had never felt before; first the palm and thumb landed and then each of the other fingers landing distinctly, one after another firmly clicking into a place of its own, and it just felt intensely RIGHT to Charlie, like this specific hand was made to hold his specific skull. Nick’s fingertips started to dig into the flesh there and Charlie felt his legs go wobbly.

Nick managed to maintain this grip and somehow slump in his seat at the same time, opening his legs wide and patting the inside of his far thigh with his free hand. “Come here,” he snarled.

Charlie found himself awkwardly jumping to obey, sinking to his knees in front of the other boy and leaning his torso up into Nick’s lap but not quite making contact. Nick’s hand had not lost its grip on his neck during this transition, forcing Charlie to stay low and feel a little clumsy but, as soon as he was settled into place, that hand tightened even more and Nick’s other hand slid down Charlie’s back to cup his ass and pull him into full frontal smash.

Nick was folded around Charlie now with Charlie’s face in his pecs. He slumped down under Charlie, apparently seeking more contact between their bodies but the angle of the seats was not helping. He growled in frustration and abandoned his hold on the smaller boy’s head, shifting both hands onto the other’s hips and wrestling Charlie into position straddling his own thigh.

It wasn’t very comfortable and they both wiggled a while to find a way to squeeze all the right bits against each other instead of the sides of the seat. Somehow Charlie’s head was now just above Nick’s who wasted no time before gnashing at his neck. His hands slid to Charlie’s ass and started forcing him to rock and grind on his leg.

Charlie struggled to keep his noises to a minimum but a significant number of moans and whines were getting away from him. His self-consciousness was just rearing its ugly head when he heard Nick’s own animalistic noises become a soft string of words against the skin of his throat.

“That’s it. You’re doing great. Who’s my good boy? Oh my god… Yes, move good like that for da…”

And Charlie froze.

And the words cut off as Nick froze a half-second later. Charlie sat up and looked Nick full in the face, his pupils still completely blown out, his breath sounding raggedy in his own ears, his heart thumping noticeably.

He shook his upper body, trying to clear out the jumble of feelings and sensations and thoughts and fears ricocheting around his mind. They both swallowed, hard.

And Charlie climbed off him and sat back in his own seat. They both sighed, almost at the same instant. Charlie smiled a little sadly and twisted around to find Nick already turning towards him and apologizing in an anguished, quiet voice.

Charlie gently placed two of his fingertips to Nick’s mouth. “You didn’t do anything wrong so no S word,” he softly admonished. “You didn’t know because neither did I but… ummmm… yeah… that talk did NOT work for me,” he said with a small frown.

They both fell back and sat with their separate thoughts.

When the air between them felt soft and easy again, Nick gently bumped Charlie’s shoulder with his own. “No praise kink, got it,” he said with a friendly wink. Charlie smiled, then his face scrunched… but two beats later, Nick shook his head disapprovingly at him, “No! None of that. You do not have to tolerate it just because you’re assuming I really like it!”

Charlie’s mouth fell open. He caught himself, pulled in his lips and let his eyes just beam at Nick. A moment later, his breath puffed out softly with, “Right. Just because you know the name of something doesn’t mean you really want to do it; you’re just showing off your ReSeArCh.” He started laughing as Nick’s protest cut through the dialogue of the climactic scene.

The other patron turned and GLARED at them and they fell over with silent laughter, trying desperately to regain their decorum as the film wound down to its predictable end. Charlie stood as soon as the first credits appeared, offered his loving boyfriend his hand and said, “come on, let’s go home.” Nick’s heart warmed as he followed Charlie out, knowing the younger boy meant cuddling in Nick’s own bed, their favorite place in the world. This attempt was a failure but they were fine.

————

Charlie was turning 17 soon so he made nothing of it when Nick had asked him to keep every weekend in March free for just them to do something fun. It was the sweet kind of thing his beloved would do. The first weekend, they had a day at the arcade while it poured outside; Nick still couldn’t beat the claw machines nor Charlie at Mario Kart but they had a blast.

The second weekend was forecast to be chill but clear and Nick declared a special day trip to the country. He had borrowed his mum’s car again and packed the whole boot with picnic supplies and blankets and whatnot. Charlie was obliviously enjoying the drive and the view; he didn’t know this area at all.

When asked, Nick explained their destination was a property owned by one of Sarah’s cousins as a place to hunt deer but the season was just over which made it safe now for hiking. Wooded hills were lush and green from the winter just past. It was a beautiful day.

They pulled up a dirt road just over a rise and found the spot where hunting parties left their cars, completely empty except for them. Nick unloaded their packs and they set off along an easy trail mostly going up a gentle incline.

It didn’t take long before they were swallowed by a forest that felt ancient with no sign of civilization anywhere. Charlie was ahead, soaking up the aesthetics, as Nick had fallen behind, eyes scanning and scanning the trees along their route.

After about an hour of effortless exercise, he called for a break. “That spot over there looks nice; isn’t it time for snacks?” Charlie smiled and diverted from the path as directed. They laid out a blanket on the far side of a downed tree and Nick spread out their choices; they chatted and ate and snapped pictures.

Nick lay down as Charlie finished; the younger boy shrugged and scooted over to spoon him. The air was as warm as it was going to get today and they both wore tracksuit bottoms and long sleeves so it wasn’t too bad resting like that a while. He fell asleep with his face buried in Nick’s shoulder blades.

When he woke up from his nap, Nick was already standing by their pile of stuff. He matter-of-factly handed Charlie a small tote from his pack and pointed at a thicket about ten meters away. “That’s the loo if you need it,” he said and turned away to his bag. Charlie ducked his head but yeah… went and emptied his bladder. Checking the tote, he found wipes, hand sanitizer and plastic bags; Nick had thought of everything.

He carefully rolled up his sleeves before using the hand sanitizer; his button-down was one of the ones Nick had given him for Christmas, a batch which were already his favorite clothes ever. The fabric was SO light and soft and the buttons down the front had recently enabled them to make some progress on casual nudity. Charlie didn’t know why but that almost felt like the most sexually intimate thing he could imagine and he really struggled with it. Well, he knew why… and the design was perfect for keeping his scarred arms covered in those rare moments when he let Nick touch his bare chest.

When he returned to their picnic site, he noticed Nick had taken off his own long-sleeve and was just wearing the pastel t-shirt underneath. He was once again admiring the ripple of muscles on the freshly exposed strong rugby arms as he dropped the tote by their pile and stepped up in front of the taller boy. In his distraction, he didn’t look up into Nick’s face.

So it took him by complete surprise when Nick surged forward and grabbed his thighs and lifted him so his legs were on Nick’s hips and he was slammed into the conveniently bent tree trunk behind him. His shout of surprise was soon engulfed by Nick’s demanding mouth.

It felt like Nick’s hands were everywhere at once as soon as his pelvis had pinned the weight of Charlie’s body to the tree. They tangled into his curls one moment, dug into his hips the next, stilled his face so he had to take Nick’s tongue fully into his mouth, bent him sideways so Nick could push his shirt aside with his jaw and chew on his collarbone.

Charlie was groaning and panting and squealing with no inhibitions. Nick was growling and snarling and snapping at his skin. Finally his voice became a low rumble repeating a single word over and over and over. “Mine.”

Charlie felt his eyes rolling back in his head. He was all heat, all electricity, all white noise, all desire and all NEED. He barely noticed when Nick reached back to pull his trainers off. He clung helplessly to his shoulders when he was pulled off the tree long enough for his tracksuit bottoms to come off; he faintly registered the “just these” murmured in his ear but felt the reassurance anyway.

He almost had the air knocked completely out of him as Nick’s hips crashed them both back against the trunk. And he groaned louder than ever as he felt the drawstring knot on Nick’s waistband hit him squarely where he most wanted friction right now.

Nick’s face was ruddy and his eyes were twin suns. He leaned back slightly and pulled off his t-shirt. The skin of his chest was also mottled with lust; Charlie latched his hands onto his sides with abandon. Nick paused half a beat and then wordlessly bunched the bottom of Charlie’s button-down in his hands and… yanked it open from below, buttons popping off or giving way on the lower half but holding on at the collar.

“My top!” he weakly protested.

Nick’s retort was immediate, loud and commanding. “I’ll buy you a new one, dammit. You’re MINE!” Nick’s hands were everywhere again; it felt like his skin was on fire as those hands roamed where they wanted around his waist. Nick’s mouth was on his neck again.

“Yours,” Charlie breathed and his body just… let go. It was still screaming with need but he was putty in Nick’s hands. Nick leaned back again and ripped the rest of the buttons open. “Mine,” he insisted again and latched his lips to Charlie’s chest, kissing and licking everywhere he could reach without losing the contact at their groins. Charlie gasped and repeated that single word and yielded… “Yours. Yours. … Yours.”

Raising his head, Nick stared into Charlie’s eyes, muttered a husky “mine” into his mouth and plunged his tongue down Charlie’s throat again. His arms locked around the slender torso under Charlie’s button-down and his hips began a steady dance which soon matched the pulse of his tongue - down and back, around and around.

Charlie was making unholy sounds but Nick’s tongue ate them all up. His fingers were grasping, flailing at Nick’s flanks. His ankles were locked together at Nick’s ass. Every nerve was straining, straining.

And that drawstring knot was rubbing and it danced just that much higher and he… came apart. Nick released his mouth just as the deepest cries ripped out of him, shifting his forehead to Charlie’s shoulder instead as he continued to grind his hips and hold him together.

It was everything and nothing all at once. No thoughts. Just sensation. It shuddered and shook him again and again. He had no idea what he sounded like. He had no ideas, period.

Slowly he regained his sense of himself. He was surprised to find his cheeks wet with tears, his boyfriend panting and motionless between his legs. His pants wet and a little chilly.

Nick pulled back just enough to check his face and Charlie could see his blown out pupils, the desires still thrumming in the delicate skin of his temples. He felt something new coiling in his belly even as his loins tingled in a pleasantly sated way. Charlie straightened up and placed his hands on Nick’s bare chest and gently pushed him back.

Nick almost stumbled but Charlie managed to step down from his hips well enough. He glanced down and found Nick’s discarded t-shirt; he bent over and grabbed it. Shoving it into Nick’s confused hands, he seized Nick’s hips and turned them both 180 degrees.

Then he knelt down and placed both hands at Nick’s waistband, fingertips barely curling in against his skin. He paused and looked up. Nick’s face was wide open in every respect. He just blinked down at Charlie and kneaded the t-shirt in his hands.

“My turn,” he said and he didn’t recognize his own voice; it was sure, determined. “I’ve been wanting to do this for a long time and I want you just like this, just you, and I want you in my mouth all the way to the end.” His gaze was steady; Nick’s was not, eyelashes fluttering as his whole body twitched subtly again and again. Finally he swallowed and nodded, an unsteady jerk of his head.

Charlie slowly pulled both layers of clothes down to Nick’s shins, resolutely ignoring what was right in front of him for the moment, and took the t-shirt back from Nick. He wadded it up, placed it behind the other boy’s butt and pushed on his hips until they hit the tree, the fabric cushioning Nick somewhat. He quickly found his own bottoms, wadded them up as well and got them under his knees.

Then he finally let himself look at Nick’s lower half. It wasn’t entirely a new view but he’d never seen everything this close and he’d never seen Nick like this, in this state. His smile bloomed across his face, delight and desire and affection and amusement all there. He felt Nick’s breath catch and he leaned in, landing with his face tucked into the delicious line running down from one hip.

Nick groaned and his hands found Charlie’s curls to tangle in. “I won’t last,” he whispered. Charlie giggled and it sent vibrations shooting through Nick’s broad frame.

“I don’t care,” he breathed into the skin that was so warm against his face. He turned and rubbed his cheek across the thickness of Nick’s cock. It was smooth, soft and hard at the same time. He nuzzled up and found the position he thought he might use for the next little while. Nick moaned and folded down over him a bit. Charlie hummed his approval from his closed lips and into Nick’s skin through the sensitive spot near the top; yes, this angle was even better.

“Charlie…” Nick pleaded, his knees wobbling. Charlie’s hands found their home on his hipbones and he opened his mouth, tongue protruding slightly and… swallowed Nick’s cock. He tasted the wetness that had already gathered; it was sweet. He felt the fullness, the girth, his mouth stretching to take him in. He pulled back and made his lips wetter with a few swipes of his tongue. He swallowed him down again, greedy to go further. It felt incredible and Nick was making the most incredible noises the whole time. Charlie felt a rush throughout his entire being; he was sucking his boyfriend’s cock and he was enjoying it just as much as he thought he would. Time to find out the rest. His head began to bob.

As promised, it only took a few strokes for Nick to fall apart; Charlie felt his fingertips digging into the other’s hipbones as his mouth was suddenly flooded. This was slightly bitter but it hit the back of his mouth and he didn’t mind it at all; he felt shivers going down his throat, his whole body. His own cock twitched with new desire. He felt powerful.

He didn’t know when to stop moving, when to let go. He slowed down and Nick pulsed in his mouth a few more times. Nick’s sounds had crescendoed without much of Charlie’s attention but now the hands had left his hair and were fumbling at his shoulders. Charlie gave the head one last swirl of his tongue as he pulled off, dropped his head and swallowed; his insides were still pulsing with passion.

“Charlie… are you okay?” Nick crashed to his knees next to him. Charlie looked up and grinned, one lean hand coming up to wipe the excess spit from his chin.

“YEAH!” he crowed into Nick’s face. The smile which then spread across the older boy’s face was incredulous but pleased. He pointed at the blanket, Charlie nodded and they crawled over as best they could. Nick shed his Vans and his bottoms completely along the way, keeping only his socks on.

He stretched himself out on his back and patted the blanket next to him; Charlie laid along one side and partially on top of him, still in the remnants of his button-down and his wet pants. They grinned into each other’s faces.

After their expressions had softened a bit, Nick ran a gentle finger down the side of Charlie’s face. “I do have a change of pants and a new top for you in my pack, ok?”

Charlie blinked at him. “Why are you so wonderful?” Nick shook his head fondly.

“Hush, after-care is part of being a good dom, you know.” He smirked a bit as he said that and Charlie had to laugh before shaking his head slightly and settling back into place. “Well…,” Nick quietly continued after a bit, “I know it took a while but we got you there, love.”

Charlie felt fresh shivers run down his spine as it hit him again what all they had done; he giggled and nuzzled into Nick’s chest. “Yep, you sure did! You’re amazing.”

Nick scoffed, “Says the boy who just sucked me dry in ten seconds! Um, YOU’re the amazing one!”

Charlie laughed again but also reared up, mock offended. “DRY?! Well dammit! I wanted to do it again today and now you tell me you’re all empty already!”

“WOT?! You insatiable beast!” Nick’s hands were verging on tickling him now; Charlie swatted them away, still laughing. He settled back into Nick’s side after a moment however.

“Ummm, yessss? That was incredible and I told you I’ve been wanting to do it forever and I’m really glad I finally could and I have a lot of catching up to do,” his usual smirk emerging on that last phrase.

Nick just smiled, shook his head and closed his eyes. His arms wrapped tightly around Charlie, the chill in the air only barely beginning to bother his naked body.

After a few drowsy minutes listening to and feeling Charlie’s happy humming, Nick frowned. “So… you added a big thing today, on top of the other big thing you asked me to plan back on the beach. Are you feeling okay about that? Does it change how we’re doing our tiny choices thing?”

Charlie pulled away a bit to prop himself on his elbows and look into Nick’s face. “I did, hunh. Let me think.” His beautiful eyes drifted into the distance for a while. “Okay, this is what has changed for me today. I want to give you lots of blowjobs all the time.” They both grinned at that repeated admission, Nick’s smile more bashful than Charlie’s of course.

“I am not ready for you to… ummm, return the favor.” Nick nodded. “But you can… touch me whenever you want on my chest under my clothes…,” another nod, “and on top of my pants wherever you want but inside my trousers or trackies or whatever…” That one got a questioning sound in response.

“ANYwhere your pants cover?!”

“Oh! Good point! Hmmmm… No, I’ll have to pull back and think about all that some more.” Another nod. “So let me rephrase: you can now stick your hands inside my trousers sometimes and we’ll find the edges of the next list of options together, ok?” An emphatic nod. “Nick?” A reassuring hum. “So you’re… like.. completely naked AND I’m touching you a lot; is that okay?” An emphatic nod.

“So… now I can touch all of you?”

Nick roused himself to lift up his head a bit and smile down into Charlie’s dazzled eyes. “And now you can touch all of me.” Charlie settled his head back onto Nick’s chest, a delighted smile on his face.

Chapter Text

It was just after Sunday brunch and Mum had gone out for the rest of the day with her beau. Nick laid on his bed propped up on his elbows, revising for his tests before the winter break between terms. Charlie, already done with his own work, cuddled with Nellie on the bean bag. When Nick finally put down his pen and quietly turned around, he found his beloved with his eyebrows impressively drawn together and lost in thought. A soft smile spread across the sixth former’s face and he let himself just watch Charlie think.

After several minutes (or some timeless time, he wasn’t sure), he saw the ravishing eyes focus and shift in his direction. He let Charlie find him with that same foolish smile he’d been wearing the whole while.

Throwing his head back with a shake, the younger boy inexplicably blushed an intense color. They each laughed self-consciously and Charlie scrambled to his feet while Nick cleared his things and made room on the bed. Soon they were ensconced in their favorite side-by-side-style position, with Nellie at their feet, and ready to catch up.

This time, Nick was slightly slumped down so he could nuzzle at Charlie’s jawline. He kept it light and playful for now. “Wotchaya thinkin’ ‘bout, babe?” Charlie tilted his chin and rubbed his curls into the top of Nick’s head. He hummed vague noises. Nick pulled back and looked into the smaller boy’s face. “It’s okay if you don’t wanna talk about it! Just tell me it’s not me if it’s not me and I’ll leave you to it,” he said hesitantly.

Charlie smiled, his eyes open and his body peaceful. “It’s not you; I just wasn’t all the way done…,” Nick’s eyebrows quirked up in the middle as the pause got longer. Charlie’s smile wrinkled up his face, “…making the new options.”

Nick bolted upright, face full of delight. “Oh ho HO! That’s excellent news and I will definitely leave you to it! How can I help? Do you need a snack? Do you need a foot massage?” Charlie just giggled loudly, shaking his head.

Once they’d settled back down, Nick noticed Charlie’s eyebrows drew back together rather quickly. After a few beats, he sighed. “Charlie… you look stuck and I’m going to remind you that we can talk it through too; it’s not like you have to solve an advanced maths problem where I’d be useless.” He lightly chucked Charlie’s arm and gave him a warm smile to take all the sting from his words. Charlie blinked at him.

“You’re right!” Charlie flipped suddenly to sit up above his folded legs, turning more fully towards his boyfriend. He nodded to himself before leaning forward with, “I think I’m just worried… about naming something you are WAY not ready for and then you’ll get freaked out…,” Nick gave him a knowing smile. “Yeah, yeah… trust issues,” he shrugged.

Nick just wordlessly opened his arms and Charlie launched himself forward to snuggle deep into his broad chest. One hand scratching through the dark loops and whorls, Nick gently rumbled, “I’ll just tell you I’m way not ready for it.” Charlie sighed and nodded. “And then I’ll tell you when I am ready for it,” Nick continued. “Or I’ll just do it, I guess, since I think you asking means you want it.” He peered down. “Is that right?” Charlie hummed a moment.

Then he sat back up and locked his eyes onto Nick’s. “It’s possible… I could… say something without really knowing how much I want it. I mean… imagination only takes you so far,” one of his hands came up between them, palm up and fingers gently bent, the movement the first half of a shrug.

Nick grinned and snatched that hand out of the air, trapping it in his two palms and bringing it to his lips for a kiss as he cheekily uttered, “I don’t know WHAT you’re talking about; I have a very VIVID imagination!” He watched Charlie’s face lighten up and then he… turned their hands so he could pull two of the other’s long, lean fingers into his mouth. He swirled them with his tongue and continued to watch Charlie’s face as new emotions flashed across it: shock and heat and confusion and then… and then it took on that rakish look he loved so well.

“I guess you don’t want me to finish that list! Because you are being very distracting!” Nick popped off his hand and looked properly abashed. His reward was immediate as the smaller boy used the momentum of that release to capture one of Nick’s hands in his own and yank him forward into a passionate kiss.

Reluctantly breaking the build up, Charlie rolled back again and caught his breath. “Ok fine, here goes. One. We get to take our trousers off when we do frictiony things with our Pants Areas.”

Nick choked on his own saliva, forcing Charlie to pause his headlong rush through the list and make sure he was still breathing. “Holy shit, Char! You did not just say that like it was no big deal!”

Charlie smirked. “Two. With my trousers still on,” he waggled an eyebrow sternly into Nick’s grinning face, “you could bend me over your knee and spank me.” Nick’s head reared back, considering. “Three. Ummm.” The face under the dark curls flushed again.

“You… I mean, I…,” Charlie was the one choking now. He swallowed and gave himself a little shake. He kept his face tilted down while he struggled to get the idea out; Nick breathed through his worries, knowing this was not his work to do. “It feels unfair to ask this when I’m light years away from doing the same but I keep telling myself that we don’t want this to be a tit-for-tat relationship!”

Nick nodded strongly at that part; it was a lesson Geoff had sent them to share and he was grateful to hear it echoed now. “Right,” he said forcefully, “no scorekeeping, my love. Just ask and I’ll be honest with you if I don’t like it.”

Charlie smiled weakly and took a shaky breath. “Oooookay, I can do this.” He closed his eyes. “I want to see you naked. All the way naked. Just hanging out naked. I wouldn’t touch anywhere new, not yet! But I want to be able to look at all of you.”

After that tumult, he gulped and sat frozen with his eyes closed so he missed Nick’s first look of surprise. What he got instead was Nick’s hands gently gathering his own, Nick’s voice making soft inquiry noises and, when he dared crack an eye open, Nick’s face calmly adoring him. It was like someone cutting a puppet’s strings; all the tension drained out of him and he smiled appreciatively.

Nick nodded. “That is a totally acceptable thing to ask me. Aaaand I am going to have to think about it because option number one is incredibly epic and I need it in my life almost immediately!” Both of them grinned and nodded and giggled until they were a tangled jumble of limbs lying down.

Soon after that, they were a panting jumble. Soon after that, Charlie was dashing to the loo and locking the door in search of some relief his body and mind would not otherwise grant him. Nick fell back on his bed and made short work of his own release; he cleaned up with some tissues and caught his breath.

Sitting up and looking towards the hallway, his face grew thoughtful. Then it grew rosy. Then he shrugged, stood and pulled off the rest of his kit. He dropped it in the hamper, looked around, shrugged again and stepped into the doorway. He turned and faced back into his room, leaning against the frame and attempting to seem casual, one leg bent, ankles and arms crossed.

He could not believe he was sticking his arse into the hallway like this and his breath sped back up. However, he jerked his chin down sharply and gave himself a shake as his brown eyes darted around his room in search of the courage or nonchalance which had landed him here and then disappeared.

Before he could change his mind, he heard the door behind him open up and he forced himself to relax the muscles in his back. Hearing Charlie’s gasp was gratifying, he had to admit. Twisting his head slightly as though he might turn around at any moment, he aimed to sound as cool as he hoped he looked. “Just hanging out naked, I think you said.”

Charlie’s breath was an entire orchestra of sounds beyond his range of vision. He stretched up tall, even preened a little if he’s honest, and heard noises he’d never heard from his beloved before this moment. Grinning now, he brought his arms down slightly and spun only to catch his fingertips along the top of the doorway, letting his body… hang there, full frontal.

Slowly he raised his eyes to look directly at Charlie through his lashes. The younger boy, however, was not ready for eye contact. His face was full of wonder and ardor alike, his eyes never settling anywhere but also never even seeming to blink.

Nick’s grin grew wider and he abandoned his hold on the doorframe, stepping forward and extending a hand to Charlie, who looked up with eyes half-lidded. Nick lead him silently to the middle of the room where the light was pooling on his rug. He dropped Charlie’s hand, raised his arms out straight and slowly rotated. In for a penny, in for a pound.

Charlie still hadn’t said anything. Nick flopped back on the bed, legs dangling over the side, his upper body still in the beam from the window. He let his hands fall loose to his sides, he raised his chin somewhat arrogantly and he… let Charlie just keep looking. His heart was racing but only because he could see the effect his every movement was having on the love of his life.

Charlie was transfixed another dozen beats before one of his hands tremulously came up as he finally staggered forward. He dropped it delicately onto one of Nick’s warm shoulders and ran it deliciously soft across the back of his neck and then down to the collarbone on the other side.

He was standing so close now, Nick could smell the remnants of Charlie’s… relief on him; his nostrils flared and he suddenly seized the slender hips, looking up fiercely to catch sight of Charlie’s shy smile.

“My Adonis,” he whispered. “My Achilles. My… Apollo.” His head started to nod when he reached the third name and his voice grew stronger. “Yes, look at you, my golden statue. My Sun King…”

His hand trailed back across the expanse of Nick’s chest; this was all familiar territory by now yet his touch was burning anew. He looked down with his face full of love and motioned for Nick to lie back. He then sat by his flank, half turned away but with his chin pulled to his own chest so he could glance sideways at the length and breadth of his sumptuous boyfriend.

They stayed like that until Nick wanted to squirm, his hands beginning to knead the bed below him. Charlie’s smile widened but he kindly drew a blanket over Nick’s lower half. Then he lay face-down on top of the blanket and began chasing this new wave of desire building between them.

——-

[almost two years later]

Charlie’s in his sapphire-colored lightweight robe in their kitchen making a cuppa when Nick stumbles out of the single bedroom of their first flat, still dazed from his nap after being completely filled and fucked out for the first time. He sees the dark eyebrows go up sharply but he’s still too drowsy to ponder why as he limps his way over to the table and lowers himself gingerly onto a chair. The golden light of late summer is streaming in at an angle which warms his back as he stretches and settles back down. He blinks happily at his boyfriend, who smirks at him with fresh delight and then languidly walks over and runs his fingernails down his shoulder to his flank, murmuring “my Sun King” as he brushes by. Nick frowns and glances down. Oh. Oops.

——-

[seven years after that]

Nick surfaces smoothly from the emerald waters and finds his footing among smooth pebbles while the tiny waves are still hitting him at the navel. What a gorgeous swim, he thinks as he surges forward, shedding droplets off his wide hips like liquid diamonds, under a Mediterranean sky.

Glancing down from his appreciation of that cobalt dome, he finds Charlie is waving at him and grinning bigger and bigger as Nick emerges more fully to stride across the sand and rocks into the shade of the cabana where his lover sits with a stack of books beside him.

Grabbing a towel, Nick scoffs, “What was the point again of splurging on this bungalow at THIS resort if you’re just gonna spend the whole time under here?!”

Charlie leans back with his trademark leer before throwing his arms out wide and exclaiming extravagantly, “Oh, but the nude beach is just so perfect for my Sun King!”

Nick loves his new husband more every day even though he doesn’t understand how that’s possible.

Chapter Text

Charlie was drifting again. He had no recollection of anything the teacher had said since he sat down. All he could think about was dragging Nick into a restroom here at school and sucking him off. Not that he had! But he REALLY wanted to. Maybe Nick had a point when he said he was an insatiable beast.

Seeing Nick had beat him to the usual table at lunch time, his cheeks flared. Nick’s mouth pursed in confusion but Charlie just shook his head and waved at Tao and Sai. Pulling out his phone, he shot his boyfriend a quick text:

| I just want u… like always; it’s fine. later… ;) X |

Nick smirked when he read it but didn’t say anything. Luckily rugby season was over; that meant Charlie might get what he wanted fairly soon… He wrenched his attention back to the chatter of their friends before he completely embarrassed himself.

Throughout lunch, he kept stealing lust-fueled glances at his smoking hot boyfriend but he started to notice Nick was catching him and then squinting. The mean voice in his head started telling him a story about what that expression MEANT and he found he couldn’t quite shush it this time. He sighed; some days, that voice and the dark spots in his field of vision, collectively the Shadows as he thought of it, were just stronger than him.

Tao and Sai caught the weird vibe and made their exits soon after, albeit kindly. Nick scooted over and enveloped Charlie in a long hug, his stomach against Charlie’s side. Charlie laid his head on the other’s shoulder.

“Wossup, love?”

“My brain is just lying to me again; I know you’re not actually mad at me for looking at you too much.” Nick’s arms tightened but he remained silent. Charlie sighed again. “I just can’t stop thinking about… y’know…”

Nick snorted a bit at that. “I do know! Literally every day I’ve seen you since our hiking trip, you’ve jumped on me to… do that…,” he grinned as Charlie protested. “Well ok, not at your birthday party last month but,” his chin bobbed down and back as he reassessed his earlier statement, “just about every other day, if we were together outside of school with ANY privacy at all. You know I’m right!” Charlie swatted at him but couldn’t really offer a counter-argument. “I mean, I’m not COMPLAINING, love…,” They grinned at each other. “But I’m a little surprised your obsession hasn’t run its course yet.”

First bell rang and Charlie sighed yet again. “You know boundaries are hard for me.” They both stood up and Nick pulled them chest to chest for a soft kiss.

“I’m not mad about any of it so tell that mean voice to feck off. We’ll figure it out, Char; we always do!” With that, he smiled warmly and waved goodbye. “See you after your test!”

“Oh shit!” Charlie turned and sprinted to class, hoping he’d have some extra time in this period to review for last period.

After school, he was chewing on his bottom lip when they met up again by the school gate to walk over to Nick’s - Charlie was glad it wasn’t their once weekly night to go back to his house for revision and family dinner. He was getting along with his parents okay lately but group meals were usually a challenge even with Nick there and, after the test he probably just flunked (you’re so stupiiiiii… he squelched that voice yet again), he didn’t want any other stressors today.

Nick strolled along at his side, holding his hand and smiling at the rare clear blue sky of spring. Slowly Charlie absorbed his peace and was at ease when they got home. Nellie got her time to wobble around the backyard on her old knees and a treat to help her settle on her cushion in the front room before the boys went upstairs.

Nick was content scrolling through socials and holding Charlie gently against his side as the younger boy did his homework. He was essentially done with requirements; next up for him was graduation and then entering university an hour’s train ride away.

He smiled down as he ruffled Charlie’s soft curls. He was pleased this afternoon had turned out to be less… desperate than the last few weeks of visits. Charlie’s… hunger… was fun but also… a little worrisome. Especially since he still had such limited ways to… pay him back. He knew it wasn’t a matter of obligation; he simply WANTED to be the one making his beloved feel that good. Charlie hadn’t left him much time to work on his… friction skills. His eyes lost focus and his mobile went dark in his lap.

When Charlie closed up all his books, Nick helped him move everything off the bed and then settled into the big spoon position as Charlie laid down. “Do you need a nap, love?” Charlie shook his head. “Snacks?” Another shake. Nick hitched himself up on one elbow and leaned over Charlie’s neck. “Rrrright, ok then,” his voice rasped…

Charlie moaned and tilted his jaw out of the way delightfully fast. Nick took a moment to take Charlie’s top hand in his and, just as his teeth met the skin of his trapezoid, his fingers locked around the fine-boned wrist.

Charlie’s gasp was nearly a shout. Nick slowly… pushed into his neck and then… twisted his head to run his canines up the muscle several centimetres. Charlie cried out and shuddered from head to toe. His trapped hand was alternating stretching and clenching but not pulling away. Nick felt himself getting hard.

He jumped up without warning and shed his entire kit with the speed and grace of the athlete he was. Charlie turned, his mouth hanging open, blinking. Nick dumped it all in a pile behind him without breaking eye contact and then snapped into a posture Charlie recognized as military.

“CADET SPRING!”

Charlie startled, his eyes wide, but he sat up on the edge of the bed quickly, bobbled his head in Nick’s direction and said, “yesssss?”

“You will respond with Yes Sir or No Sir! Do you understand?!” Charlie blinked, shook his head with a moment of disbelief and smiled before he sat up taller and said, “Yes, sir!” in a voice that bordered on insolent.

“Are you ready to report for duty, Spring?!” Charlie’s mouth formed a small O before he smiled again and said, “Yes, sir!” with more enthusiasm.

“Then on your feet, Cadet!!!” The dark-haired boy shot up. “Trousers off!” He complied with a bemused look on his face. Nick’s arm came up pointing at the bed. “Pillow!” Charlie picked one up; Nick’s arm now pointed at the floor directly in front of himself. “Report!”

Charlie felt his face flushing as he noticed how eagerly he placed the pillow there and, glancing up at Nick’s face only to receive a confirming wink, dropped to his knees in front of the taller boy.

Here he was so close to Nick’s cock once again but it felt more like the first time, in the woods. Nick had taken control of this and he wasn’t sure why. He took a deep breath through his nose and then he looked up.

Nick’s face was almost severe, brows drawn down, mouth closed… but his skin was swirling with heat and he was clearly aroused. His right hand came up in front of Charlie’s face, thumb crooking into a hook; it didn’t stop moving until it had pushed his lips and then his teeth open and buried itself in his mouth to the hilt.

Nick’s other fingers were draping themselves over his cheek, jaw and throat. Charlie was making noises deep in his abdomen already where heat was spiking. He leaned into it, eager to please.

Nick let him swirl the thumb around with his tongue for a minute before the rest of his hand tightened and pulled him in. Charlie felt the digit pop out of him and, only seconds later, he was crushed up against Nick’s cock and fighting to get his lips around it.

Over the past few weeks, he’d gotten plenty of practice so he soon found a decent angle. Nick’s hands were both in his hair as usual but they were… slowing him down…? Charlie whined, his hands coming up to grasp at the thick thighs.

“Cadet!” he heard Nick bark and his hands leapt off his skin like they’d been burned. “You will place your hands behind your back whenever I say Parade Rest, is that clear?” Charlie hurried to obey. “Good! You do not move them without further orders!”

Charlie was already struggling to maintain his balance like this when Nick’s hands and hips both dropped slightly at the same time, strengthening the hold on his skull and deepening the angle of entry both. Charlie felt all his nerves light up at once as Nick began to move INTO him instead of letting him do all the work.

It stayed slow as Charlie’s throat unconsciously covered Nick’s cock in spit until he was sliding smoothly over the buttery skin. He attempted to flick his tongue in the ways he had been learning Nick liked but it was impossible in this position. He felt filled up and defenseless and… it was electric and soothing at the same time.

He felt his muscles uncoiling in places he had not known were tight. His moans got lower and longer as his breaths seemed to expand everything inside him. His hands tangled and twisted helplessly behind him. His own cock grew heavy inside his cotton pants.

Since the hiking trip, he had been carefully rubbing himself just enough when he sucked Nick off only to dash to the loo as soon as it was, well… polite. But today he realized it would be disobeying “orders” if he did that now so instead he squirmed and whined, especially when Nick increased the pace.

Nick interrupted his own low groans to snarl out, “Hold your position, Cadet! I swear to God… if you move…,” His pace increased again and became somewhat erratic. Charlie was seeing white as Nick’s fingers clenched and clenched at his head and his cock pounded into his mouth. They’d already established Charlie actually liked gagging on it but he was nearing his limits this time when… Nick arched his back and came deep and hard.

“FUUUUUUUUCK!” Nick bent back into a circle around Charlie’s quivering, impatient body. His voice stuttered out into silence as he pulled himself, still pulsing, from Charlie’s mouth and sank to his knees. His arms engulfed Charlie’s own and pulled those aching hands around to the front. His head was falling leftward into Charlie’s right shoulder, nodding, and he was moaning soft sounds of encouragement.

Charlie swallowed and clawed for air and fumbled his hands into his pants desperately. He felt Nick’s left hand curl around his back, holding him close so tenderly, and then he felt Nick’s right shoulder drop under his chin and his right hand cup around what he was doing to himself.

He arched against the strong torso of his love and then almost slammed his forehead into Nick’s chest as they shifted angles together and their three hands found a rhythm. It did not take long and he could not believe it but he was rocking and howling and cumming without shame right where he was. And it was good, so good. He fell even more into Nick’s embrace, feeling every cell of his body vibrating with spent passion and fresh happiness.

———

Charlie was thrilled to be packing for two weeks in Menorca; Sarah had declared adding him to the annual Nelson trip was part of Nick’s graduation celebrations. All his lightest-weight clothes got thrown in the case and his swimming trunks too.

The early morning departure and the multi-stage journey and the meeting new people and the stress wore him out so, as soon as they walked in the villa, he asked her where his room was.

“You and Nicky have the one down that hallway, dear, behind the kitchen; there’s an en suite for every bedroom, isn’t that nice?” Charlie blinked at her.

“Oh, we’re sharing?” He glanced over as Nick came up to them with his bag, praying his face wasn’t getting too red.

Sarah folded her arms and harrumphed at him gently. “Charlie Spring, you are 17 and Nick is almost 19 and you’ve been dating for two and a half years. Yes, you’re sharing! Now, I expect you both to be good neighbors to the rest of us and to do your share of the chores and to show up for some of the activities. But otherwise please - enjoy yourselves!”

Chuckling at his gaping face, Sarah shooed the two of them off and went to help her sister settle the twins. Charlie blinked at his boyfriend, who just grinned at him and lead him to their room… which had a queen-sized bed in it. Charlie froze in the doorway as Nick found a spot to put his things down.

Nick was still grinning when he came to take Charlie’s things out of his nerveless hands and add them to the pile. He then guided Charlie to the bed, shutting and locking the door behind them. He eased him out of his extra layers, his shoes and his trousers before tucking him in. Then he sat down beside him and stroked his back.

“Mum doesn’t know any details,” he murmured, “but she knows we do stuff when she’s not there and she’s always been ok with it because she knows we’re being respectful since we’re in love.” Charlie couldn’t quite process it before he drifted off into his nap.

The vacation remained dream-like for Charlie. He could not believe how easily he was slotted in to the Nelson chaos. The twins adored his jokes and he actually enjoyed walking through the little town with them while Nick chatted up his aunt and uncle a few steps behind.

It helped, of course, that Nick’s brother had skipped this year and that every night Charlie was lying down in the same bed as his beloved with plenty of room and privacy. Waking up every morning tangled in Nick’s arms was something he would miss when this was over.

One delicious dreamy day midway through, Nick had begged off the daily outing and promptly dragged him back to that generous bed as soon as everyone left. Nick closed the door and immediately started shedding all the clothes he had put on for breakfast. Once naked, he literally… bounced into place, carefree and grinning, stretched out on his side on top of the still-rumpled duvet.

Charlie gazed at him bemusedly as he slowly removed his trackies and unbuttoned his shirt. “My Sun King…” he purred as he slid up to mirror Nick’s position and ran a finger up his stomach.

Nick let Charlie finish his exploration before lifting his own hand to track from Charlie’s navel up and around one nipple and then finally under the open shirt to curl onto his back and pull them closer together. “My Duke,” he whispered as their foreheads met. “Strongest man I know…” Charlie closed his eyes and felt peaceful love just float all over him.

They lay intertwined and lazily, sloppily kissing. The warm air was soft and they were in no rush. At one point, Charlie lay back and Nick snuggled under his arm to doze a while. He awoke to Charlie’s fingers playing in his hair and drool on his chin. They smiled widely at each other as Nick propped himself up and wiped it off before settling his free arm and chin back on top of Charlie’s torso.

Charlie hummed inquiringly at the look on the other’s face. “Oh, just thinking.” Nick turned to rest one ear near Charlie’s heart and look down the length of his beloved. “I’m so glad Corporal Nelson could help Cadet Spring with his little boundaries problem…,” he said with a gently mocking tone.

Charlie barked a rueful laugh and shook his head. “Oi! No making fun of my boundaries problem!” Nick’s head sprung up.

“Never!” His face was drawing together but Charlie’s free hand darted up to rub that expression away.

“I know, I know. Silly.” He smiled fondly and then shrugged. “It did really help though, thanks. I needed to right-size that activity, as Geoff would say. Not too much, not too little.” They both thought back over the last few weeks and what had shifted that day.

Suddenly Charlie wiggled out from under Nick, reached down to remove his cotton pants and threw them on the floor. Nick’s face was all rounded surprise. Charlie pulled in his lips and shrugged again, shyly.

“I mean, it’s not like your hands haven’t been in there plenty recently!” Nick grinned up at him. “May as well add your eyeballs to the list of things allowed in my pants.” He flopped back down and covered his face with his free hand as Nick settled back onto his chest and openly enjoyed his new view.

“Char…,” came a whisper not long after. “Char, you are so…,” a hand languidly came up to trace new circles and whorls, starting at his navel again. “So so… SO fucking pretty.” Charlie took a deep breath and let his hand drop back down to wrap his boyfriend in a tight hug.

Nick returned it and waited for the moment it naturally fell apart to turn and start dropping feathery kisses on the skin below his chin. “Can we…,” kiss, hesitation, kiss, hesitation… Charlie hummed at him encouragingly. Nick sighed. “You haven’t put it on the list yet and I never wanted to be pushy but I’m starting to worry you won’t ever put it on the list and I really wanna!” Charlie blinked at this whiny little speech and then giggled in disbelief.

“You want to what?” Nick paused a beat, eyes searching Charlie’s face, and then thoroughly licked his lips and turned to look down the length of the body in front of him. “Oh,” was the softest exhalation of air ever. Nick breathed mindfully, watching Charlie’s abdomen rise and fall a little erratically. And then… he let his eyes drift further as Charlie’s beautifully olive-toned cock… twitched.

Wordlessly they began to move. Slowly, careful not to disturb this bubble of acceptance, Nick rotated on the bed until he could drop kisses all over Charlie’s soft belly. Charlie pulled on Nick’s hips until they were close enough for him to nibble. Both of them quietly worked their mouths over the other’s skin, closer and closer. Nick timed it so he engulfed Charlie just moments after Charlie engulfed him. They both shuddered as they felt the soft flesh fully engorge on their tongues at the same time.

Soon they were both lost in sensation. One and then the other would fall back and just gasp, taking turns to explore with noses and lips and tongues. Charlie tasted so sweet, like honey, and Nick was reveling in it, making the happiest chortles when he was busy and panting when Charlie was busy.

It built and built, in waves and surges, until Nick felt Charlie’s fingers flailing at his temple. He pulled off and looked up. Charlie pulled his hand back to Nick’s hip with his index finger held high. Nick nodded and fell back slightly. Within moments, he was cresting again and Charlie was groaning (louder than Nick!) and slurping away.

The instant Nick could, he was locked back onto Charlie’s delicious cock even as the breath ran ragged in his throat. His movements weren’t practiced nor steady but they apparently worked just fine because a minute later he finally, finally got to taste and feel what he’d been craving for so long.

———

This was it, their last weekend before Nick moves away; Sarah left them the house and stayed over with her beau. They started off strong, Nick pinning Charlie’s half-naked body to the bed, one of his hands easily keeping both of Charlie’s wrists above his head, and practicing his friction game. No tree trunk could compare to his own bed; no drawstring knot could compare to this: two cocks freely sliding around each other in one broad, well-lubed hand.

Recovering his breath slowly under the comforting weight of his well-spent boyfriend, Charlie was struck anew by how far he’s progressed these last six months. He never would have imagined becoming comfortable with what they’d just done. Nick’s eyes had stayed on him like laser beams until they both bent with release and it hadn’t sent him spiraling at all even though he knew he wasn’t in control of his face in those moments.

It did help so much that he now knew he WAS in control of saying what he wanted and didn’t want. Narrowing the choices down to manageable sizes, talking through what worked and didn’t work afterwards, negotiating exactly where boundaries currently were - this was work they willingly did… together.

Charlie’s arms came up to clasp Nick’s sweaty back tightly and he pressed his mouth into Nick’s shoulder with all the pent-up love he was feeling. Nick roused enough to roll to one side and they tangled up comfortably and dozed some more in the afterglow.

Later, after a sensuous shower together and a leisurely meal together and some couch/movie/Nellie time downstairs, Charlie led Nick back to bed, a plan half-formed in his head.

Shoving Nick firmly to sit on the edge of his bed, Charlie stood in between his thick thighs and gathered Nick’s face into his hands. He studied it for a minute, his brows shifting as his eyes danced from feature to feature. Nick just looked back up at him like a trusting puppy dog, his arms lying loose around Charlie’s waist.

Charlie thought he maybe felt the steel backbone Nick claimed he had solidifying inside him as the plan finished clicking into place in his mind. Suddenly he dove down and Nick’s startled expression opened his mouth just in time for Charlie’s tongue to completely fill it. He thrust it in and out several times until Nick’s knees were shaking against his sides.

Then he stepped back halfway across the rug, snapped his arms to his own sides and barked, “CADET NELSON, ARE YOU READY TO REPORT FOR DUTY?”

Nick’s face was such a mixture of shock and delight and heat that Charlie lost it and started giggling. That sent them both off, bent over and laughing arms-length apart. Finally they panted and beamed at each other and settled the butterflies swooping inside them.

Charlie snapped back into military posture but his face remained in full flirt so the effect was a trifle marred. Nick sat up straight and mock-saluted, grinning like the goof he was. Charlie cleared his throat and went searching for that steel core. “UP, CADET!”

Nick jumped to his feet. “Strip, Nelson!” T-shirt and pants landed on the floor. “Pillow!” One was obtained. “Report!”

Nick pulled in his lips a moment, clutching the pillow to his chest, and practically wagging his non-existent tail. Charlie smirked…, “STOP THROWING HEART EYES AT ME, NELSON, AND COME SUCK MY DICK!”

Nick hopped to obey, his body visibly reacting to this new role - the swirl of colors over his chest and stomach was mouthwatering, the darkening between his legs even more so. Charlie watched him drop the pillow, bend to his knees and place his hands behind his back without speaking.

Charlie looked down his nose at his favourite person in this or any universe. He raised his hands from his sides, hooked both thumbs into the waistband of his own pants and paused, watching Nick’s eyes flicker down and back up as he literally panted in anticipation.

“You will keep your arms in Parade Rest until I say so.” Sharp nod. “When I say so, you will grab my ass,” grin, “but only on top of my pants; remember your manners, Nelson, and do not go under them in back.” Solemn nod.

Charlie pulled down the front of his pants. “You may proceed.”

Some timeless time later, Charlie’s brain regained the power to form thoughts. Ummmm… yeah… he could get used to this. To receiving this… worship from his beloved. To feeling both his own pleasure and Nick’s… which was gratifyingly obvious. Oh god, in fact… he wanted to do this again… and again… really soon!

Charlie, as usual, just cannot get enough!

Chapter Text

Nick dropped his briefcase on the hotel room desk and picked up the tiny gym bag he had started packing separately for these business trips. After today, he needed to get out of his head for a while.

He pulled out his phone and popped off a quick text to Charlie:

|Presentation went a bit shite. Hitting the gym now. FT during dinner? XOX|

An answer came in almost immediately, making him smile:

|xoxoxoxoox tomorrow will be better, love. make those arms even stronger for meeeeeeee. talk later YES!|

Scanning his premium membership card at the kiosk, he was reassured to see the same layout and machines he’d seen in a dozen other locations of this chain. He went to change and warm up.

An hour later, he was wrapping up the core routine with his favorite workout: 20 sets of 10 reps lifting 110 pounds from the bench. He got the bar ready, laid down and started in. One of the uniformed staff was nearby and able to spot just in case but he’d done this a million times so he wasn’t worried.

After his first couple of sets, he noticed the staff member had wandered closer. The black shorts were in his peripheral vision but he kept focus; the timing was key in this workout.

“OI, MATE! WHAT ARE YOU DOING?” The voice startled him and he almost lost his balance but he powered through and took a moment to glance over during the next 30 second rest. Yep, Black Shorts was talking to him. He shrugged and began the next set, counting it off as usual.

“Five two three four five six seven eight nine ten.” Breathe, count back from 30, repeat. “Six two three…”

“Why are you going so fast?! Bro, this is bonkers!” Black Shorts was circling him. “What is that on the bar?! Mate, you look like you could bench 250, 300 easy! Why are you jagging off with these?!”

“Twelve two three four five six seven…”

Black Shorts came to stand near his head, a little closer than was necessary for spotting him. “Steve, are you seeing this, bro? Yeah, crazy routine, right?!”

Nick saw two people passing by and heard one mutter, “Gawd, leave him alone, already! … Plus, he’s so hot…”

Black Shorts was having none of that. “HEY, GET YOUR GAY ASSES AWAY! He’s just doing it weird; you don’t need to say that gay shit in here!”

Nick’s skin burned. He carefully finished the last set and sat up. He grabbed his towel and his water and caught his breath. Black Shorts came around, chuckling, as he did. His thick neck, moonish face and pointy hair were just like Nick had imagined.

“Dude! I’ve never seen a workout like that! What’s the point? What’s your secret?”

Nick smiled to himself, stood and glanced around. A few other patrons were within earshot, including two lean, muscle men wearing matching pink tank tops; they looked apprehensively over and he caught their eyes, trying to look friendly.

He turned back and made note of the badge hanging off Black Shorts. “You know wot? I’m going to tell you the truth.” He smiled and the guy smiled back. “I do that endurance training that way because sometimes… I like to pick up my tiny husband…, bend him in half…” Black Shorts wasn’t smiling anymore but Nick’s grin was getting wider with every phrase, “and bounce him on my dick. Because it feels amazing. For both of us.”

Nick heard gasps and then appreciative snaps coming from his new BFFs in pink. “So go hit the showers, Chad, because you smell like you never wash your taint and I’m gonna go try to get you fired right now for being a bigot.” Nick’s eyes crinkled shut as he grinned again, tickled by the way the other man just blinked and then scurried off.

He turned and went straight to the front desk to lodge his complaint. Pink Tank Tops followed him and took the first chance they got to introduce themselves. They backed up his story to the manager, who seemed receptive and made vague promises. Nick shrugged and thought about his cool down; yeah, he needed to stretch out if nothing else.

He saw Chad leaving in a huff and he let out a sigh he didn’t know he had in him. Chatting with his new friends some more, Nick found the right equipment and settled his shoulder and back muscles especially.

Then they all hit the showers in the changing room. Nick felt the other two peeking but he continued un-self-consciously. As they all got dressed, Mateo asked if he wanted to grab dinner with them; Larry’s expression behind him made it clear the invitation could include more if he wanted.

Nick smiled easily at them. “Awww, thanks but no thanks. I’m having dinner, virtually, with my honey tonight.” He grabbed his bag. “I appreciate it though. What’s your favorite pub around here? Maybe I’ll see you there next time I’m in town; I’m always looking for queer-friendly spaces.”

They consulted with each other and recommended the Black Cat; Nick made a note in his phone and Larry offered to trade numbers. Nick paused, “Ummm yeah, that’d be cool but… just so you know, my marriage is a closed circle. No hard feelings; just like to make that clear. Always want more rainbow friends though; is that okay?”

Mateo smiled warmly. “Oh, that is so sweet. Yeah, of course!”

Larry piped up, “He’s a lucky guy.”

Nick grinned. “So am I.” As they passed phones around and entered Contacts, Nick shook his head ruefully. “He is gonna kill me for telling a whole gym about our sex life though…”

They all laughed and parted ways with a friendly wave at the main exit.

|Char… I did something… bad? Good? Bad-good? Can’t wait to tell you about it soon! ;-)|

Chapter Text

A week after their day trip to the art museum, Charlie sat on the floor of the Nelson living room Christmas afternoon, happily opening his final present from Nick. It was large and lumpy; when he tore open the paper, he found a stack of long-sleeved button-downs, mostly in blue and green hues. He ran a hand over the top one. “It’s so soft, thank you.” He smiled up into Nick’s pleased face.

Sarah chuckled softly. “I swear you two are already an old married couple; who buys their sweetheart CLOTHES?!”

“MUM!” was the extent of Nick’s embarrassed protest before Charlie piped up.

“But they’re lovely! And look at the other things; they’re sentimental!” He waved his arm over the pile next to him. Sarah got up from her own pile and smiled fondly at both of them.

“It wasn’t a criticism, boys! You’re gaggingly adorable, as Tao would say.” She went to get a bag for the rubbish. “Now help me clean up before you run off.”

Curving together face-to-face soon after in Nick’s bed, they giggled over her “married couple” observation, shy with each other about how giddy it made them feel. But then Charlie’s head fell to one side as his eyes lost focus.

“Char? What is it?”

The dark-haired boy turned his attention back to the brown eyes inches away. He scrunched his mouth and huffed out his nose. He looked away again, in search of the words this time.

“Ummmm, I just had one of those intrusive thoughts again. Like me and Geoff are working on…?” Nick nodded.

“Do you want to talk about it?”

Charlie wrinkled his lips before shifting his eyes back to Nick’s and admitting wryly, “Not really… which probably means I should.” Nick just smiled softly.

The drummer’s strong, knobby fingers kneaded the duvet bunched between them as his eyes roamed around the room. “So they always come with… like, a cloud? of black dots? They’re not REALLY there! I’m not hallucinating or anything!” Nick made soothing noises. “My brain just… fogs over and that’s what it looks like for a second… Anyway there’s this… dark voice that hisses at me… UGH, I sound delusional!” He groaned and pitched forward, away from Nick.

“Charlie, this description is what Geoff helped you figure out, right?” A quick nod. “And you trust Geoff that naming it will be helpful, right?” A slower nod. “And do you trust me to not judge you?” Nick tried to project all his confidence and love into his voice.

Charlie nodded again. “I, me, the real me! does, yeah absolutely. But the dark thoughts…,” he shrugged rather helplessly. “They’re so mean and afraid all the time! They said… they said…,” he gulped and Nick rubbed his bicep reassuringly. “They said you’d never marry someone like me… a boy… when you could have an easy life with a… wife and kids…,” Charlie’s face looked like he’d been running flat out in PE and he closed his eyes to regain some peace. Nick just kept rubbing his arm and breathing evenly.

When Charlie opened his eyes again, Nick smiled gently. When the air between them was soft again, he parted his lips and, with an exchange of glances and eyebrow quirks, got Charlie’s wordless approval to ask, “You keep saying They but it’s one voice; is that right? I just want to understand…”

Charlie nodded, his left hand finding Nick’s right next to the headboard and slotting them together. “The voice and the cloud of darkness together… The Shadows, I call them sometimes,” he shrugged, “when I’m trying to fight them off…,” his voice started to choke on the words, “but they’re so much stronger than me, Nick…,” He finally made eye contact again, surprised to find Nick shaking his head vehemently.

“Oh no, love; they’re not! Come here…,” Nick gathered the smaller boy into his chest and started stroking his fingers through his hair. “Thank you for telling me, Char. I know I can’t fix any of this for you… but I really…,” Nick sighed, “want to understand and be there for you… And I trust Geoff; what does he tell you to do about the Shadows?”

Charlie burrowed deeper and half-shrugged; he mumbled, “I have homework where I write down what they say so him and me can talk about it.” Nick nodded quietly. “It’s gonna,” frustrated sigh, “take time to learn how to manage them.”

The two boys sat in peaceful silence a long time, Nick’s right hand aimlessly finding new places to rub and caress the whole while. Charlie dozed off, waking to a low rumble in Nick’s chest that he realized was a kind of tuneless song. He picked up his head and looked at his boyfriend quizzically.

Nick smiled a little distractedly and his hand finally stopped moving. “I’ve just been thinking about what you told me… I can almost see it, Char… your clouds.” Charlie sat up more fully, intrigued. “I can see what they do to your face when they pass by…,” He shrugged, “but it kinda became a little story bouncing around in my head,” he said sheepishly.

Charlie blinked and then rolled his neck to indicate Nick should continue. Now it was the older boy’s turn to knead the duvet. “It’s like you wake up and learn how big the shadows over your head will be that day… If they’re wispy, you can eat and laugh and function. But some days, they’re covering your whole…,” Nick threw his arms wide, “kingdom!”

Charlie’s head tilted, “My wha?!”

Nick laughed and shrugged. “The shadows are a character but you’re the hero, Charlie; I reckon you’re a knight or a king or something.” He glanced up through his eyelashes at the other boy. “You’re the strong one who always fights through it, even when the clouds seem huge.” His smile slowly spread over his entire face as he saw Charlie taking it in instead of scoffing at his silly fantasy.

The dark curls shook slightly and Charlie swallowed. “You think I’m strong…? Me?!”

“Ummmm, yessss!!!!” Charlie just gaped at him. “Char! Who joined the rugby team for a crush and then actually bothered to learn how to play?! Who asked me over anyway when you worried I was just your supportive straight friend?!” They both chuckled at that. Charlie’s eyes were starting to twinkle again; Nick picked up his hand. “And who asked me all the perfect questions when I was scared out of my mind so we could have our first kiss…,” Nick’s voice was barely a whisper by now as he used his other hand to cup Charlie’s cheek. “If you weren’t so brave and strong, there never would have been a Nick and Charlie story at all, love.”

They gazed at each other with adoration some long uncounted moments. Nick finally broke the spell with a tiny shrug. “So… yeah… you live in the Shadows but you’re the hero… the King of the Shadowland?” his head tilted.

Charlie shook his head, smiling. “Not the Prince of Shadows.” They both laughed. Nick’s face scrunched. “Hmmmm. A… duke?” Charlie considered and smiled his acceptance. Nick grinned and grabbed his hands. “My Duke in Shadows!”

Charlie’s head tilted again. “In?”

Nick’s grin didn’t slip an inch as he shrugged again. “Yeah, you just live there. You’re not in charge of them, right?” Charlie slowly nodded. “They’re just the weather around your… tower.”

Nick’s eyes grew glassy as his voice wandered on. “I was thinking it’s in a beautiful place, your tower, but you can’t always see it due to the clouds. But, like, you almost always get up and walk out into it anyway, trying to reach the edge of the darkness if you can.”

Charlie was blushing and smiling but he eagerly added, “To find you, my Sun King!” Now it was Nick’s turn to blush and smile as they both remembered that day a month ago when Nick sat in a pool of light wearing nothing at all because Charlie wanted to look at him.

Nick’s eyes began to dance. “Will you change into one of your new button-downs for me?” Charlie blinked at this seeming change of subject. “Aaaand will you,” Nick took a deep breath, “let me watch you change?” Charlie’s mouth fell open slightly. “You know you can say no, love…”

Charlie swallowed, blinked and nodded slowly. He got up, found them and picked up one of the green ones. He sat down on the edge of the bed half-turned towards Nick who remained leaning on the headboard. He looked a little dazed.

“Maybe if you unbuttoned the new one… and then unbuttoned the one you have on… and then, just real quick!” Nick suggested. “I’m honestly okay if you want to skip or wait…”

Charlie’s fingers were already opening up the new garment. He kept his eyes down, his striking brows drawn but not scowling. His fingers trembled a little as they moved from the cuffs of the new top to the cuffs he was wearing. His hands moved agonizingly slow up his torso, undoing one button at a time as if he were in a trance.

Nick was barely breathing lest he shatter the mood. His eyes were darting from wrist to navel to collarbone. Charlie’s skin looked so soft everywhere new he could see.

The younger boy undid the top button and his hands dropped into his lap, one thumb jerkily rubbing the opposite cuff. He sat there a long time. Nick remained motionless but he could not tear his eyes away from where the cloth was gaping open and he could see one of Charlie’s dark round nipples.

Suddenly Charlie was all motion, peeling the top back in a way that made Nick gasp softly. For a second, it hung there folded back half way down the slender frame and Nick wished he could take a photograph with his eyeballs for future reference. Then the sleeves came off with two fluid swoops and Charlie was fumbling for the new one in desperation.

Nick very obviously looked away at that point and felt rather than saw Charlie relax a little. He didn’t look back until the new button-down was being pulled up Charlie’s back. Nick knew the scars on his arms were at the heart of some major trauma and insecurities; he went back to just watching and breathing shallowly.

Charlie paused with the collar still in his hands as the fabric settled into place on his shoulders. He stretched his neck like a cat and let his arms settle by his sides. He raised his head and looked up at his boyfriend through his eyelashes; Nick’s heart stopped for a moment before thudding on, louder than before.

Charlie’s voice was low and raspy. “You got these just for this, didn’t you? They’re so much lighter than mine and I could keep them on the whole time… we do stuff… You thought about that and got them just so I could practice being comfortable like this?” He waved one hand at his naked belly as Nick nodded silently. Charlie’s eyes welled up and Nick longed to hold him close but the air felt electric and he wasn’t sure why yet.

Charlie closed his eyes as he took a long, shaky breath and then… his body unwound in a way Nick could literally see. When Charlie opened up those beautiful eyes again, he was shaking his head in wonder. “I have all these,” he gestured vaguely at his temple, “things going sideways up here but you still want to be with… the guy fighting shadows… How did I get so lucky?”

Nick shrugged. “I’m pretty sure I’m the lucky one; not only do I have the coolest, prettiest boyfriend alive,” he grinned and then tilted his head thoughtfully, “but I also just… got born in the sunshine.”

“No, you ARE the sunshine.” Both their faces broke out into fresh grins, Nick’s a split second after Charlie’s.

——————

Geoff loves Nick’s story; he and Charlie revisit the metaphor many times, fleshing it out in a way that Charlie can apply to his framing of real life situations.

Some days, the Duke can’t leave the tower at all. He needs sleep and caretaking and that’s okay.

Some days, he stumbles through the fog and doesn’t emerge into the sunlight. He needs space and to give himself permission to flail in ways that don’t hurt anyone.

Some days, he crawls to the border of darkness on bloody hands and knees…

But it will get easier. He is crafting his armor out of his own soul, tempering the metal he pulls from deep inside.

Nick often tells Charlie he can see his steel backbone. He says it again the first time Charlie lets Nick’s fingers gently trace the lattice of scars, sitting completely shirtless in a sunbeam together.

“Sometimes the Duke gets hurt but it’s not his fault.” Nick’s voice is so, so gentle. “He fights so hard, even on the days he knows he can’t win. He’s the strongest person I know.”

———-

This year, Sarah and Nick celebrate Charlie’s Truham graduation by taking him back to Menorca with them. The two young men are sharing a bedroom much like the previous villa; the dream is marred only by the presence of David, the homophobic older brother…

Mostly they manage to avoid him and he’s clearly been told to be on his best behavior but dammit if he doesn’t ruin Charlie’s first attempt at joining the game Nick and the twins are playing in the pool!

Charlie clearly remembers packing his trunks the previous year but he’d never gotten around to swimming then… always coming up with an excuse when the time came. But it had been hard to see or hear how much fun the others were having and he’d set himself a goal. Next time…

And here they are! Next time is now. But the instant before he’d started to pull his top off, who should walk out onto the patio but the permanently-sneering Nelson sibling. Ugh. Nick’s eyes were full of compassion and patience but Charlie fumed while he sat and watched from the sidelines again.

Safe in their private space, Charlie is standing completely naked by the bed looking at his arms and trying to decide how obvious the scars might become if he tans. Nick comes out of the en suite and wraps around him from behind. He silently nuzzles into Charlie’s neck for a minute and then walks around to his bag, pulling out and putting on the spare trunks he brought since his other pair is still drying in the side yard. He cocks his head at Charlie, one side of his mouth bent in his signature smile.

The smile takes over his entire face as he watches a steel glint appear in his beloved’s eye. Charlie grabs his own trunks off the bed, yanks them on and, squaring his shoulders, walks to the door just like that; he throws it open, winks at him and stalks out. Nick thinks a defiant Charlie is just about the hottest thing he’s ever seen and he practically runs to catch up to him.

———-

[eighteen years later]

“PAPA, STOP!” Nick catches himself as he practically runs past the open bathroom door, backing up to find their little redheaded Year Two bristling behind her Daddy.

“What is it, Franny?”

Her lower lip is quivering already; oh dear, she’s won this round in the first shot and starting dinner will have to wait. He smiles and enters the small room where Charlie sits on a stool next to the tub, ready to start washing Luca’s hair.

“You have to do the story time; it’s a Big Bad Day,” she wails.

“Is it?” he glances down to check in with his husband, who tilts his head and waves one hand from side to side in the air between them. Nick notices their baby boy is already a little glassy-eyed sitting in the water.

Both of Charlie’s sleeves are rolled up high and one long, elegant hand is holding the side of Luca’s head, gently scratching away the Big Bads that always threaten their special tot when he’s overstimulated. Both of Luca’s still-chubby hands are on Charlie’s forearm, tracking and rubbing the scar tissue there, up and down, again and again.

Nick nods and scoops up their daughter, settling her on his lap as he plunks down on the toilet lid. “What shall it be then, Fran?” She leans up and whispers in his ear; as he nods again, she settles into his neck and then he rubs his beard into the top of her head as he thinks.

“Once upon a time, there was a Duke who lived alone in a tower in the clouds,” he begins, trading warm looks with his beloved. As the familiarity of the script soothes everyone in the room, Charlie is slowly able to ease the shampoo through Luca’s black ringlets.

“Papa, you forgot to say the border is made of rainbows this time,” Franny interrupts self-importantly. “Because rain clouds and sunshine make rainbows!” Nick nods at her very solemnly and catches Charlie’s eye; they smile again.

Luca relaxes into the water from the rinse bucket, finally dropping his Daddy’s arm which has always been his favorite sensory experience. All clean, he goes back to playing with his sea monster bath toys as Charlie stands and grabs a hand towel.

Soon after, Nick is reaching the well-loved finale of their family pattern: “And the Sun King gave the Duke his heart that day, having fallen in love with the strongest man he’d ever met. The End.”

Charlie has been leaning against the vanity to catch the end of story time. His dazzling eyes hold Nick’s as though no time has passed since the first day in Hamlet House.

“But Papa!” Both men, a trifle startled, turn to their headstrong girl attentively. “Where did the Shadows come from?! And what made him strong enough to fight them every day? You never said!”

Nick’s gaze locks back onto Charlie’s and he sees his husband’s chin come up, his face afire with curiosity about Nick’s answers.

“Hmmmm, good questions, m’lass. I think the Shadows were always there somewhat,” he shrugs. “Some people are just born in Shadow lands and that’s how it is. But when he was young, the Shadows in his duchy got bigger when some Big Bads tried to take away the parts of him which were the most beautiful and colorful.” Charlie’s face is still calm and warm.

Nick’s voice throbs with love. “And he’s strong because his insides are made of steel. And he never let them change him; his strength comes from knowing exactly who he is.” With that, Nick stands, gently puts Franny down, steps over and gives Charlie a lingering kiss.

“PAPA, STOP!”

———-

The Duke and the King meet at the border almost every day to embrace each other, each time like it is both the first time and the last time they will do so.

The two men then lose themselves in each other’s eyes for a timeless time before leaning in for a kiss as the outlines of their bodies dissolve into the sparkling air, until tomorrow…

The seven tiny pennant flags on the pole atop the Duke’s tower rise up from the wispy clouds: dark indigo at the base fading to light blue and then one in white and then light green shading to dark green at the top. They never lose saturation, they never fray. They constantly flutter in a light wind, creating a dance of beauty and delight if anyone were to see. They are pride, they are strength, they are life.

Chapter Text

The second time Corporal Spring had called Cadet Nelson to service was just as fun and arousing as the first time a few weeks before but a lot more rushed. It seemed Charlie could not get enough and dragged him into a stall in the train station restroom. Nick had no pillow, only his own eagerness, and so he bent in half rather than kneel down. It made Parade Rest impossible; he had to cling to Charlie’s hips and ass the entire time so he wouldn’t fall over as his lips and throat desperately closed around that delectable cock.

It wasn’t until they broke apart the second time, Charlie pulling his skillful hands out of Nick’s trackies, and stopped gasping as they cleaned up that Nick noticed the other’s discreet adjustments to his own pants. His eyes got wide again as he realized what he’d done in the heat of the moment.

“Oh Char, I’m sorry! I didn’t mean to do that!” He fumbled at the narrow shoulders, trying to make things better somehow.

Charlie laughed breathlessly and slid into his arms fully. “Do what? Give me a wedgie? It’s ok!”

Nick held him close, caressing the soft curls he had missed so much, but shook his head a little sadly. “No, I… It’s not... I… my fingers went way too far in there… or you wouldn’t have a wedgie. That’s still off limits and I know better.”

Charlie pulled away smiling fondly up at him. “It’s ok,” he insisted. “Now come on! We’re gonna be late for lunch with Tori!”

Nick chuckled in disbelief. “Oi, whose fault is THAT?!” Charlie just smirked and, confirming they were presentable enough, lead him out to the sinks.

—————

The mirror above the sink at the Nelson home was completely fogged up. Having taken advantage of every shred of privacy over their overlapping winter breaks, Nick and Charlie were soaking their… tender parts… in their first bath together.

There wasn’t a ton of room to stretch out so Charlie had wound up in Nick’s lap in the middle of the tub, one set of legs folded up in each direction. At first, it was all resting and talking and giggling and soaping each other gently. But young bodies being what they typically are, it soon became something else.

Nick groaned as his cock engorged once more; he had not thought it would be possible today. He pulled away from Charlie’s plummy lips, tucked his chin to his chest and lightly bounced his forehead under Charlie’s jaw. The smaller boy giggled and tried to catch his breath but could not help his body from shimmying slightly, Nick’s erection slipping and sliding along his butt cheeks.

“CHARLIE! Holy crap, sit still! Please!” Nick’s voice was hoarse and sultry. His arms tightened around his boyfriend’s torso, trying to quell the little motions making his blood boil. Charlie, his hands loose on the back of Nick’s neck, threw his head back, giggling even more. This made the shockwaves continue and Nick noticed the cock against his belly was also excited yet again.

Nick groaned and rubbed his forehead into Charlie’s chest, shaking his head. “You’re gonna be the death of me, love,” he breathed out and repositioned his hands in another attempt to still the body on top of him. “You know, for someone who made me close my eyes before you would finish undressing and get in here, you’re being awfully bold now, Char!”

As soon as he finished, he knew it was the wrong thing to say. Charlie’s body had finally gone completely motionless. Nick winced but kept his head down and his movements small. “I’m sorry… I should not have said that. I didn’t… I don’t mind!” Squeezing his face shut as tightly as could be, Nick’s brain raced to backtrack and make it all better somehow. “I’m not looking, you’re fine, I’m not looking…”

His voice stammered into silence as Charlie slowly tipped his head back so they could make eye contact. Nick could feel the weight of his gaze and finally cracked one eye open. Charlie’s smile was rueful but kind; his arms had dropped down Nick’s back, out of sight as usual. He sighed and tilted down so they were resting nose to nose.

Nick’s head shake was tiny so their nose tips stayed in contact. “You’re doing so great, hon. I never want to pressure you… or assume… Yesterday was amazing but I know it doesn’t mean you’re ready for full casual nudity all the time. I want you to feel comfortable and if that means closing my eyes so you know I’m not staring at your scars, I will do that… for the rest of my life!” His voice throbbed with love and Charlie’s smile spread to his eyes.

After a silent beat, Charlie stretched his back like a cat and then… slowly brought his elbows down, returning his forearms to where they had been resting against Nick’s chest earlier. They both just breathed into each other’s faces.

“It’s ok,” he whispered. “This is okay.” Nick’s lips quirked up on one side and he nodded slightly. Then his brows came down in the middle and two vertical lines appeared between them; Charlie tilted his head inquisitively. Nick shifted his hips and ripples spread out around them.

“What about… hrmmm… where we were rubbing a bit ago? Where…,” he cleared his throat nervously, “ummm… what about this?” One of his hands fell into the water to press his softening cock back tight up against Charlie’s ass for just a moment. Charlie’s eyebrows shot up and he pulled his lips in but Nick was reassured to see just surprise and no stronger feelings.

“Oh! Yes! Well…,” Charlie’s flustered reaction was now making Nick grin shyly. Charlie scrunched his face and shook out his shoulders. “Hmmm, yes. THAT is okay too.” He smiled again and gave a tiny shrug. “It felt good actually.” His eyes shifted to the side and unfocused. Nick waited patiently. “I’m not ready still… for any part of you to go… there…,” he swallowed as his voice dropped to a whisper, “to go… inside me…,” Nick nodded quickly.

“And we never have to do any of that, Char!” he blurted out and Charlie’s startled eyes returned to look into his own. Now it was Nick’s turn to swallow thickly. “I… I want to…,” he sighed and closed his eyes. “I want to do whatever you want to do, whatever works for you…,” He slumped into silence.

He felt Charlie pull an arm away from his chest and then one finger was tracing his eyebrows, along his hairline, down a cheek. He remained as he was, concentrating on his breath. Charlie’s voice was barely audible. “What is it, love?” Nick’s eyes flew back open at the pet name, so rarely used by the smaller boy. They smiled softly at each other.

Nick took a deep breath and resumed, “I am happy to wait and… I would be happy to,” shrug, “skip… all that if you want us to.” He paused and frowned again but Charlie could see the wheels turning and he just gave a small sideways jerk of his chin, quelling the dark voice in his mind before it could ramp up.

Nick sighed and his eyes returned to Charlie’s as he admitted, “This is difficult. I want to respect your boundaries and I know they can change over time; I’m not mad about anything… I just…,” he scowled and shook himself, “I just also need you to know that… when you ARE ready… if… IF and when you’re ready… I really want to do all the things you want me to do there, ok?” His face was wide open, almost shining by the end of this speech. Charlie blinked at him softly.

“You do?!” Nick smiled at that wryly.

“Ummm YES! I am proper gay for you, Charlie; thought you might know that by now!” Nick grinned and sloshed the water with a vigorous roll of his hips at that last part. Charlie squealed and clutched at him. 
They both laughed a little and settled back into air which was easier to breathe again. Charlie’s chin jutted forward suddenly. “Like what? What do you want to do to me?” His eyes were half-lidded as he looked down into Nick’s warm face.

The young man blinked and then gulped. “Well uhhhh… I’d like to…,” his voice grew huskier and his hands settled firmly on Charlie’s rear end. “I seem to recall spanking made the list at one point; is that still an option?” Charlie slowly nodded. “I’d like to try that… And… I want to touch you… there…,” Their airways were tightening again. “I want to push my fingers… inside you…,” Charlie’s hips started twitching. “I want to… sink… my tongue… inside you…,” The air thickened and coiled around them. “I want to… open you up… and go deep… into you… with this…”

Nick’s hand flattened his cock, rigid again, up against Charlie like before. The slender torso arched like he’d been hit by lightning. Nick’s face lit up. “So… you do… like the sound of all that then?”

Charlie’s eyes burned into him and he had his top teeth firmly planted in his lower lip; the wobbly nod was just icing on top of the confirmation cupcake. Nick grinned and swayed them together. His hand started to fall away from where it had been pushing their skin together and Charlie chased the contact by sliding down him. Nick gasped as his cock became rather lodged in Charlie’s ass crack and Charlie whimpered.

“Just this, Nick; please! Just like that right now… Need you… right there and… no more…,” Nick nodded eagerly and Charlie began to rock his hips, dragging the length of Nick through the vertical fold of him, giving them both half of a sensation, partial friction, a controlled burn.

Nick still felt fully on fire but as Charlie’s moans increased and Charlie’s hand dropped to his own cock between them, Nick’s hand returned to its position, palm flattened against the outside of his cock, trying to stabilize this wild ride as well as give himself the missing friction.

“God! Yes! Charlie, what you do to me!” Nick’s head rolled and he found himself almost chanting, “Uuuuuuh, I love you, I want… oh god, I want your ass, I love you, Charlie, god, I love your ass, yessss!” He lost all his words as he came apart, his hand smashing his cum against Charlie’s back as they thrashed together. Charlie was moaning loudly and losing all coherence in the rhythm so Nick’s hand quickly joined his and the murmuring began again. “I love you, that’s it, I love this cock, yes, there you go, love!” Charlie cried out and Nick felt the warmth of his release hitting his chest.

Some minutes later, Nick noticed how cold the water had gotten and he cleared his throat gently. Charlie’s head came up from his shoulder to look at him. “Umm, could we head back to bed soon?” They smiled at each other with ease and relief.

Gingerly, they finished cleaning up, wincing where tender flesh had gotten even more tender - stolen glances became soft giggles as they wordlessly admitted they had overdone it again. Finally they were settled into Nick’s bed, still both completely naked much to Nick’s delight; he wrapped his arms tight around the narrow shoulders as Charlie’s head landed on his chest.

Nick woke some time later with his arms slack and wide spread but Charlie’s head still? again? on his chest and one of his fingers drawing random shapes on his abdomen. “That tickles…,” he breathed and the motion froze. Charlie’s head snapped up but, when he saw Nick’s half-smirk, he settled back down and his hand resumed, albeit more carefully.

Nick wiggled his toes and subtly stretched his back so as not to dislodge him. “Hmmmm, I feel good. Worn out! But good,” he rumbled. “You?” Charlie’s head nodded but he didn’t speak.

Nick focused on his breathing, keeping it even and deep. After a minute, he began humming a tuneless song and Charlie raised his head again almost immediately, turning towards him and pulling his mouth sideways as their eyes met. Nick just raised his eyebrows and kept the lazy smile plastered on his face.

Charlie huffed quietly and sat up, rubbing the back of his neck, as Nick also rose, scooted back and leaned against the headboard. Charlie didn’t jump at the invitation to resume cuddling but his free hand reached out and gripped Nick’s closest wrist, then gave it an absent-minded pat.

Nick went back to breathing and humming. Finally Charlie’s eyes focused again and he smiled and leaned into Nick’s arms. Nick rubbed his cheek into those unruly curls and drank up Charlie’s scent.

His voice low, measured, Charlie began to share. “I was thinking,” Nick nodded and they both giggled softly, “about how we… hrmmm… proceed from here…,” Nick hummed encouragingly. “That was lovely…,” smile-squeeze, “and I do want all those other things… and more…,” sigh, “and I don’t see how to get there… again. I feel,” one hand flopping up and down like a dying fish, “right back where we were on the beach!”

“Char…”

“I know, I know…,” sigh. “I know I’m not, dammit brain!” He swallowed. “I’m so much further now… being comfortable… with this…,” Nick nodded vigorously and Charlie chuckled. But after a beat, he sighed again. “You’ve been so patient…”

“Charlie!” came the urgent but gentle word. The dark head froze and then nodded slowly.

“Right. You’re having fun too. I know.”

“SO! MUCH! FUN!” came the immediate response and Charlie oofed with each of the accompanying squeezes. They both laughed and laid there a minute. Charlie’s head started nodding, his neck rolling as though it would free the words he needed…

“Okay… so… I need help.” Charlie’s lips pressed into a thin line for a beat but he took a deep breath and rolled his neck again. “Yes… And it’s probably like last time… Is that ok, to ask that much of you right now?”

Nick tilted his head and thought a moment, caressing Charlie’s neck the whole while. “Do you have a deadline for whatever your goal is?” Charlie shook his head. “Mmmm… yeah okay… of course, you know I will do whatever I can to help you, love. Can you give me more details and parameters? If not now, later…,” Charlie opened and closed his mouth and sat up again; his eyes turned and beseeched Nick without words.

Nick reached out and gathered his hands. “How about I ask you specific questions to see if it gets you started?” Charlie nodded, grateful. Nick’s head ducked shyly and pondered. “Okay, what I said in the tub, that’s the goal? All of that or only some of it?”

Charlie’s face scrunched up. He looked down and swallowed. “Ummmm, all? of it?” Nick pursed his lips; Charlie cleared his throat and shook his shoulders slightly before nodding emphatically. “Hrmmm, yes. All of that.” Nick nodded, smiled and stroked his thumbs over the hands he was cradling.

“Which part is easiest?” Charlie’s torso rolled and bent as he groaned. “So… that’s a None of the Above then?” Nick smiled fondly. “Do we need to stop talking about this right now?” Charlie shook his head almost angrily. “Okay… how does it feel if you let me go in whatever order I want?” Charlie’s face scrunched again. “That’s a no… Hmmmm. Okay, I’ll try saying each of the things… as best I can… and we’ll see what that does…,” Charlie just raised his eyebrows and Nick shrugged. “I’m winging it here, love.”

Charlie looked away and sighed. “Don’t say it,” Nick teased and Charlie whipped back around and smiled sheepishly. They both looked down at where their hands stayed entwined.

“Oooookay… spanking? Scary?” Head shake. “Cool. Fingers?” Mouth twist, head shake. “Nice.” Bashful glances, smirks. “Mouth?” Face clench! “Oh! Ok! So we leave that for last then?” Big sigh, nod. “That’s no problem, Char, I promise!” Smile. “So… can you say how fast or slow you want to build up to… hrmmm… gah!” Nick rolled his eyes at his own struggles. “Why is this so much worse right now? I literally had you riding me earlier!” Charlie’s eyes were finally dancing again; Nick dropped his chin and grinned up at him through his lashes.

“Ummmm, just don’t jump straight to THAT the first time…,” Charlie shrugged. “And… no mouth… there… until further notice.” He grimaced. “I think that’s it?” Nick nodded happily.

“Can I ask more questions?” Nick’s face was getting red again; Charlie’s eyebrows went up but he nodded. “Hrmmm, you need me to take charge again, right?” Sharp nod. “Can I… mmmm… can I… hold you down?” Smile. “Hold your… throat?” Shy nod. “What about… prep? Do I need to warn you to… clean-” Charlie choked and lurched forward before Nick could even finish the phrase. “Char! Are you ok?”

Charlie just shook his head violently, his face buried in the duvet for several minutes. Nick started rubbing his shoulder as soothingly as possible and tried to keep his own breathing steady. Finally a voice emerged from the mattress; “nope nope nope,” it rasped.

“Got it.” Finally the dark head subsided and twisted around to nuzzle Nick’s side. The brown eyes followed this movement a little sadly and were followed by a hand, tangling into the curls and tugging slightly here and there. Charlie’s breath finally measured out normally again; he looked up. They smiled at each other. “I got you, babe,” Nick promised.

Chapter Text

Charlie’s last all-weekend visit had been at Valentine’s Day almost three months ago. They’d gotten dressed up and gone out for a fancy dinner. Nick loved showing his boyfriend around town and he loved showing his boyfriend off. Charlie had looked so sharp in his suit and tie; Nick had gotten them matching boutonnières and everything, tiny red roses declaring their commitment in front of everyone.

Although maybe their eyes and body language did that just as well. They ate their tapas slowly, sometimes feeding each other. Nick had sweet-talked the server into letting them each have a single glass of wine even though Charlie was just under the legal drinking age. They lost themselves in the romance of the evening.

Back in Nick’s room, Charlie had surged up into a kiss almost the instant the door closed behind them. Nick responded eagerly and they were both disrobed soon after. They were still inching towards the bed, hands and tongues roaming, when Nick suddenly pulled back and raised his right hand in front of Charlie’s face, his necktie dangling there in his grip and his eyes half-hooded.

Charlie pulled in his lips and wobbled his face at Nick insolently, eyebrows disappearing into his curls. “Oooookay, wot?” Nick smirked and cupped his left hand around Charlie’s cheek a moment before reaching behind to the base of his neck and GRIPPING it tightly. Charlie’s eyes unfocused and his body slacked immediately.

Nick maneuvered him to sit on the edge of the bed and then knelt down in front of him, gathered his wrists and looped the tie around them. Charlie’s breath became a little ragged as Nick concentrated on tying a knot of the right type and pressure. He made sure the younger man had the range of motion he wanted and then he stepped up and back.

Their eyes locked. Nick’s were molten, Charlie’s glazed. Nick let his wander up and down the slender body, noting the twitching and flushing and… thickening happening. He nodded to himself and climbed onto the bed. Gentle but firm hands turned Charlie so he was face down across Nick’s lap where he leaned against the wall.

Caressing every part of the already writhing body on top of him, Nick began to chuckle deep in his chest. “Look at you, love. Already on fire, aren’t you?” Charlie nodded desperately, his ass jutting into the air where Nick’s hand had just pulled away from it. “So so eager… So… so naughty…,” Charlie’s head slammed down against the bed as he bent his spine the other way.

One of Nick’s hands tangled in the curls there while the other returned to his rear and delicately traced random designs on the cheeks and rubbed the flesh warm. Charlie quivered quietly, resting on his elbows, hands in front of his head twisting elegantly inside Nick’s red tie.

Nick increased the pressure on Charlie’s head just slightly, pinning one end of him in place, and cupped his other hand before landing it sharply against the fullness of Charlie’s ass.

The younger man cried out, muffled by the mattress, and rocked into the hand holding his head, his breath speeding up and his body shaking more. Nick pushed down here and rubbed there, taking his sweet time before suddenly landing another sharp crack… short pause… another.

Charlie’s body was already unwinding across him, somehow relaxed and tense at the same time. Nick marveled at it and at how natural it felt to alternate between soft and hard touches. He did not settle into a rhythm, wanting instead to keep it unpredictable, but he did practice several more rounds of spanks before easing his other hand off Charlie’s skull.

The curly head reared up and Charlie gasped and moaned and shook, his ass pushing back against where the larger man was currently kneading his cheeks. Nick slid his hand down the flushed face of his beloved, pausing to sweep his middle finger sideways through the wide open mouth but quickly falling away from Charlie’s attempt to capture it.

Tucking his wrist into the slot between Charlie’s shoulder and neck, Nick wrapped his broad hand around the graceful throat and locked his thumb on one side and his index finger on the other, just below either end of the jawbone, making a rigid U shape which grazed but did not impede Charlie’s airway. The dark curls bobbed as the smaller man tested the limits of this new arrangement, his sounds becoming more urgent and guttural.

Returning his attention to the other end of his Valentine, Nick could not stop grinning, grateful he didn’t have to maintain a stern face in this position; he was having way too much fun!

He gently scratched all over Charlie’s reddened ass cheeks, assessing his work so far. Nodding to himself, he pulled his arm back and turned to look at what he could see of his beloved’s face. The gorgeous eyes were closed, the generous lips were open.

Smiling to himself, Nick let his whole torso shift as he primed his arm, watching Charlie brace for impact and then… dance… as nothing happened, hips and shoulders and head all bouncing with anticipation. “Niiiiiiiick!” he breathed, pleading. Shifting his gripping fingers slightly stilled the younger man once more.

A long quiet moment…

The inevitable fall of his arm, the palm of his hand crashing into the meatiest flesh…

The delicious sounds ripped from both of them…

The arch of two incredibly aroused bodies…

Nick’s knuckles were pressing small circles into the pink as he caught his breath; he spared a glance at Charlie’s face, loose and focused inward, before nodding to himself and reaching sideways for something on his desk at one end of the bed.

When his hand found Charlie’s ass again, the fingers were slick and fast, one slipping between the cheeks and up against his entrance, making small circles across its exterior in a split second. Charlie’s eyes flew open and his entire body shot forward violently, Nick’s hand racing to catch up and repeat the new motion.

“AAAAAAAaaaaaHH!!!” Before Charlie’s outcry could get even louder, Nick’s other hand had jumped from his jaw to clamp around his mouth. Both of them panted and took in the moment.

Charlie’s tremulous nod almost broke Nick’s heart as he watched his boyfriend’s eyes close again and his neck relax, letting the weight of his head fall into Nick’s hand but not moving away from the muzzling effect. God, the trust this beautiful man had in him!

Nick swallowed and shifted their position back into something more balanced before intensifying the pressure of his exploring digit. The slender body began… rippling across his lap. Nick leaned and got more lube before pushing the tip of his finger… just inside…

Charlie’s moan was… intense, needy. He pushed back against Nick’s hand, ready for more. Nick obliged him, sinking in up to the first knuckle. Charlie’s head was nodding constantly now. Faster than he had dared hope, Nick found himself thrusting into Charlie’s well-lubed ass with two fingers. He experimented with different motions until he found the right hooking draaaag in the right spot that made Charlie make noises around his hand that he’d never heard before.

Suddenly his boyfriend was folding backwards and into a little ball curled to his side, forcing Nick’s hand to fall away from its home inside him. Nick noted Charlie had worked his way free of the tie as his near hand came clawing up his chest and Charlie’s mouth… completely, hungrily engulfed him.

“Shiiiiiiiiiiit,” Nick groaned as his head fell back and his eyes rolled up in his head. It did not take long before he was shuddering and thrusting up into that welcoming throat, Charlie’s body shaking and his far hand now wrapped firmly around himself, his near hand trembling and patting at Nick’s jaw. As soon as Nick was fully spent, Charlie uncurled a little and fell forward, his forehead landing on Nick’s far thigh and his neck laying across Nick’s now-too-sensitive cock, both of them fluttering there a moment.

Then Nick was desperately shifting them both just enough to get his fingers back inside that ass; he paused for more lube as Charlie’s far hand began moving in earnest upon his fiercely purple cock. Quickly they matched rhythms and Charlie had to latch his mouth onto Nick’s leg to stay quiet as wave after wave of need crashed through him, Nick’s fingers pounding again and again into that clump of nerves inside him.

Throwing his head back, Charlie began to keen, wild and high, his ass sitting back to lodge Nick deep inside as rope after rope of cum sprayed Nick’s side and the bed below them. Finally Charlie collapsed and Nick dragged his hand across the duvet before leaning and cradling his beloved’s entire body to his chest.

“I got you, I got you, babe,” he murmured as Charlie wiggled in his arms until his ear could pick up Nick’s heartbeat. He looked up, pupils dilated, mouth still panting.

“God, I love you,” he breathed before closing his eyes. Nick just rocked him there for a long time, face alight and tender, following every line of Charlie’s face, his curls, his neck…

Later, in that magical space just before sleep claimed them, Nick asked him if it was deliberate, the way Charlie almost always made sure Nick orgasmed first. “Mmm hmm,” Charlie hummed into Nick’s neck, arms and legs thoroughly tangled up. “Safer…”

Nick’s head tugged down a bit, chin in Charlie’s curls. “Safer?!” The younger man just nodded. “Safer how?”

Charlie shrugged a little and the words came out slowly, like a fishing net dragging treasure off the ocean floor. “Then… I know… you… really… wanted it…,” he nuzzled in deeper, “wanted me…”

Nick’s eyes were wide, looking up at but not seeing the ceiling. He nodded slowly. “And then you can let go…” Charlie nodded and nuzzled again, burrowing somehow deeper yet into Nick’s space, into every available nook and cranny of Nick’s heart and soul.

Nick lay there a timeless time, adjusting plans and enjoying the miracle in his arms, in his life.

——————

Nick grinned as Charlie finally stepped off the train, wearing the blue cardigan he had given him for his birthday the month before. Sweeping him under the umbrella, Nick wrapped his free arm around Charlie’s neck and dove in for an exuberant kiss. When he pulled back, it was to see those amazing eyes looking up at him in pure delight; his heart sang.

Asking after his journey and carrying his bag, Nick walked his beloved back to his dorm through the light rain. As they entered the common area Nick shared with a handful of other guys, several of them shouted out greetings and invitations to join them watching a game of footie; Charlie had met most of them on his day trips and they were decent people.

Nick shook his head to the invitations as he motioned Charlie through to the hallway which lead to the row of bedrooms. Logan, the guy a year older who shared a wall with Nick’s end unit, was particularly insistent but Nick replied easily, “It’s the World Rugby Cup this weekend; that’s more our thing, thanks anyway!” Charlie waved at the group awkwardly as Nick swept him off.

“It IS?!” he whispered as they approached Nick’s room. His love just grinned at him and unlocked the door.

“Fuck if I know,” he giggled quietly. “I just have plans to keep you to myself this weekend.” Charlie entered the room blinking in surprise but, as Nick settled his bag into a spot on top of the dresser, his eyes took in the new microwave, mini-fridge, shelf of his favorite snacks and stack of folded towels on the desk next to the giant pump-bottle of lube hidden inside the decorative canister he had been so tickled by last time.

“Jesus, Nick! I’d say you do!” he chortled. Nick beamed at him, his body practically vibrating.

“It’s okay?” he asked, suddenly a little shy. Charlie just stepped into his chest, wrapped his arms around his waist and nodded eagerly up into his face. Nick duplicated the arm wrap and leaned down for a kiss; they lingered, slowly rediscovering each other’s lips and tastes and soft sounds.

Slowly it became more heated. They leisurely stripped each other, piece by piece carelessly piled on the desk chair as they swayed around the small room. Finally they were grappling on the bed together, legs gripping and sliding as they found their first release of this tyrst in friction.

Laying back and enjoying Nick’s affectionate afterglow head rubs along his ribs, Charlie could hear the flatmates cheering a goal from the living space. He blinked, “Logan was gone last time?” He bent his head to check his guess with his boyfriend.

Nick wiggled up to plant a kiss on the tip of his nose. “Yep! Visiting his girlfriend for Valentine’s so I could do ungodly things to you in here.” He grinned cheekily up at Charlie’s horrified gasp.

“You asked him to?!” he squeaked. Nick shushed him, shaking his head.

“No no no. It just worked out that way. He didn’t know. I don’t talk to these guys about our love life!” Charlie breathed again. “You’re just gonna have to be quieter this time,” Nick teased as Charlie blushed.

The next morning was Saturday and Charlie’s only full day on this visit; Nick had big plans. But he woke up to find Charlie neck deep in his own agenda, researching the World Rugby Cup.

“It’s! in! the fall! Every four years!” Charlie threw in Nick’s face as soon as he returned to bed from the en suite. Nick rolled his eyes and shrugged before settling back by Charlie’s side. His heart in his eyes, Charlie jutted his face in Nick’s direction, “You’re a dork!”

Nick just grinned at him. Charlie sighed and put his phone away. They snuggled quite a while, even dozing back off. Nick then heated up the coffee he had bought special for his caffeine-addicted love.

Later they had snacks and watched a movie, still naked. Nick’s hands never quite stopped moving over Charlie’s skin, keeping them both tuned to a low, pleasant vibration.

Several times, Charlie thought it was leading somewhere and then… it didn’t. At one point, after more snacks and naps, he initiated a deep kiss and Nick responded, letting Charlie go so far as to straddle him and rub his erection on Nick’s belly before rolling them over and pulling back so they only touched at their hungry mouths. Charlie whined but Nick’s hands were on top of his, firmly pressing them into the bed, and his hips remained out of reach.

Slowly, excruciatingly slowly, Nick dragged his mouth away from Charlie’s and pressed kisses into his neck and chest… only to let go and sit up and smile like nothing had happened. Charlie gaped at him and then grabbed one of the pillows to whap him across the head.

Nick just grabbed it and laughed. They wrestled and Charlie managed to be on top again for a minute… but it couldn’t last as his rugby lad used those scrum skills to plant Charlie into the mattress right where he wanted him. Nick beamed down at the flushed face under the dark curls, dove in for a quick kiss and then bounced away to sit on the side of the bed.

Charlie sat up and pulled his lips sideways. “What’s gotten into you?” His striking brows were just starting to draw together when Nick leaned over to pick him up and resettle him on his lap sideways. “Oi! Nick!”

The older man’s head fell back as a giant laugh erupted from his chest. Charlie shook his head, feeling a little tiny and helpless held like this. When Nick caught his breath, he unabashedly grinned straight into the other’s face. “I’m just happy with a slow burn; thought you would have noticed by now,” he winked.

Charlie harumphed. “Fine but you could take the edge off, Nelson!”

Nick’s right eyebrow shot up dramatically. “Oh, just the edge, Spring? You could be on that edge a long time if you’re not careful!”

Charlie’s shock at the results of Nick’s research never failed to delight him; another giant belly laugh shook through him and jostled the smaller man. Charlie swatted at him ineffectually, “Oh so now you’re an expert on edging too; of course you are, Mister Interwebz!”

Nick shook his head and smiled. His arms tightened around Charlie and he nuzzled those curls he loved with all his heart. In return, he got a sigh of acceptance and hands caressing his neck. “Ok ok, you have a plan. I’m yours. What’s next?”

But halfway through this little speech, Nick had started to flush, his eyes becoming dark pools. He swallowed and nodded into Charlie’s now-surprised face. “Yes,” he managed to growl out, “you are.” He squeezed the slender frame to his chest. “Mine.”

Charlie pulled in his lips and just nodded slowly, his eyes darting here and there across Nick’s face. The larger man leaned in as he drew their heads together and, closing his eyes at the last second, fed on Charlie’s lips, hungry and fierce. The kiss went on and on, Charlie’s body coiling and curling around him.

Nick turned and laid him tenderly on the bed. He found the delicate wrists with his strong hands and held them in place on either side of Charlie’s now gasping face. He crashed back into that mouth, those perfect bee-stung lips, and fed some more while he brought his own body into position, hovering just above Charlie’s, hipbones touching now and then.

As he pulled back so he could move into Charlie’s neck and chest, the moans and gasps increased with every new mark laid into the pale flesh. Nick snarled a soft “mine” in between each love bite. Eventually Nick found the end of the range he could reach while keeping Charlie pinned to the bed. He paused to review his handiwork. Raising his eyes to those of his beloved, he let a satisfied, predatory smile creep across his face.

Charlie’s pupils were blown out, his breath ragged, his hands limp under Nick’s strength. Nick licked his lips, nodding and chuckling slightly. “I have something for you,” he whispered hoarsely. “Don’t move.” Charlie nodded shakily; his only other movement, his wrists twisting into the mattress as they were freed. Nick sat up and reached under the bed, drawing out a flat and rather plain cardboard box.

Working quickly, Nick opened it and pulled out the contents, discarding the box on the floor and smoothly turning back to Charlie. Who felt his knees turn to jelly. Who could barely breathe. Whose whole body flushed as Nick gently pulled him up to sit next to him and… carefully wrapped the cuffs around the drummer’s wrists, fur side in, sturdy black leather with metal buckles.

Charlie’s breath returned in a gale as he watched his beloved check the tightness; no way these were coming off halfway through! But they were incredibly soft against his skin and he could twist in them enough, he didn’t fear they would cause actual pain. His eyes darted up to find Nick’s face somehow fierce and tender at the same time.

They just breathed a beat, looking at each other. Nick nodded sharply then and stood. One hand came to grip the back of Charlie’s neck again, a move they had learned was guaranteed to make him pliant, putty in Nick’s hands.

Directing him with firm, considerate pressures here and there, Nick soon had Charlie on his knees facing the bottom of the bed frame. He came around and took the leather straps trailing from the cuffs, drawing the younger man down to his elbows, so he could tie them competently around the solid wooden crossbar of the footboard.

Charlie swallowed air desperately, knees already quivering. Nick climbed back onto the bed between him and the desk. His hands quickly returned to their constant caressing which had been driving Charlie mad all day. Soon he added more love bites all along the trembling flanks, shoulders and back.

His face smashed against the mattress, Charlie strove to muffle the needy noises being pulled from his belly. But when Nick dropped down to start making marks in the backs of his narrow thighs, he couldn’t help it; he latched his mouth onto the duvet and just screamed. Every nerve was on fire.

And stayed that way when Nick pulled back, not touching him at all right now, just giggling softly as he drank in the sight of his love like this. Charlie thrashed his arms but the cuffs kept him where he was, where Nick wanted him.

And Charlie felt wanted. He was on display but Nick’s desire and delight were too obvious. Especially as his hands finally returned to Charlie’s electrified skin, gripping strongly at his hips, and he brushed the front of his groin slowly sideways across Charlie’s ass. He felt how rigid Nick was, how much he was burning for him.

Then Nick sat back and he could hear the pump of the bottle… He tried to just keep breathing but the first touch of Nick’s index finger on his back door pulled yet new noises out of him. It also sent his hips rocking away and back wildly but almost instantly he had Nick’s other hand on his back, steadying him, giving him that reassurance that everything was under control.

He started nodding; it seemed to help last time, kept Nick moving along. Charlie’s need to be filled boiled through every nerve; he didn’t want either of them slowing this burn down any further.

Sure enough, they worked back up to two fingers and Nick found that motion in short order, the one which had worked so well. Charlie found the rhythm which would get him closer and tried to drive them to that point where he could… Wait… Not in these cuffs, he couldn’t…

His rocking ground to a halt but his cries, if anything, got more desperate as Nick didn’t let up. He was whining and mewling and… just taking it, taking the pounding and stretching from Nick’s fingers… He felt some muscles contract unpleasantly but most of him kept buzzing and building, building and buzzing as he withstood the thrusting…

Which suddenly stopped…

It was like Nick vanished. He couldn’t feel anything but these infernal cuffs preventing him from yanking around and swallowing his boyfriend’s cock. He twisted as much as they allowed and glimpsed Nick hovering, his groin a few inches away from Charlie’s rear. He felt both of Nick’s hands grip onto his hipbones. He fell forward again, groaning loudly.

Practically chewing the comforter now, Charlie waited for Nick to make the next move… only to feel that same sideways brush he’d gotten earlier. Not nearly enough friction, not nearly enough… pressure. And then that vanished too, leaving only brawny fingers digging into his flanks.

It happened again.

And again.

Charlie was grunting non-stop. His hips would have been moving if those strong rugby arms had permitted it. A fourth brush of that turgid cock began and Charlie heard himself growling, “Just FUCK me already!”

Nick chuckled breathlessly. He CHUCKLED! Charlie buried his face in the bed and screamed again. “NIIIIIIIIIIIIIIICK! IsweartoGod…”

And then…

He felt it bumping…

He nearly collapsed from relief, Nick’s fingertips keeping his torso up through sheer willpower. What was clearly the well-lubed head of Nick’s cock was slipping and sliding and bumping right up against his entrance. Charlie whimpered and his hands clenched into fists against the edge of the cuffs.

Slowly…

he was breached. His knees wobbled, his legs adjusted to bring them into the perfect angle. Another inch. He moaned. Another. He shimmied. Eventually he felt Nick’s groin once more, fitted perfectly up against his ass, locking that entire resplendent length inside him.

They both just breathed.

Charlie pulsed.

Nick pulsed.

They both gasped and then moaned.

Charlie began panting and nodding and rocking. He felt Nick adjust the grip of his hands and begin to move. And suddenly he could do nothing anymore. No movement could match so he didn’t move; he just… received. He felt his bones come apart. He was all clingy muscle, all slick skin.

And it was so good. Nick was effusive in his noises, incoherent as they were. Every nerve ending was firing at once so Charlie wasn’t sure when they became words but then the chant took shape, “so fucking hot, Charlie Spring, you feel so good, you are mine, god, this ass, mine, I’m gonna, Jesus Charlie, you feel amazing, I’m gonna CUM INSIDE YOU ARGHHHH” and Nick was slumping forward and Nick’s hand was on HIS cock and Charlie was also yelling his release, yelling his throat nearly raw.

And then he was falling down, his boyfriend cushioning it, bringing them both down to the bed so Charlie was a little ball. And Nick was reaching up to unbuckle the cuffs and gathering Charlie to his chest and they were both nearly sobbing into each other’s shoulders and their arms were around and round and lips found lips and it was so good.

Charlie woke some time later to find Nick watching him, a hesitant smile playing with one corner of his mouth. He blinked and half-raised up his head. “We’re upside down,” he murmured.

Nick giggled and nodded. Charlie smiled up at him sleepily before reaching up one hand and pulling Nick down for a lingering kiss. “I love you…,” he pulled back to whisper. “Thank you for today.” And he closed the distance between them again before Nick could respond.

When their lips finally broke apart again, Charlie then found himself crushed in a classic Nick Nelson hug, every unexpressed emotion coming through the tendons and sinews. He hummed and nuzzled and gave it all back as good as he got.

The next afternoon, Charlie boarded his train home a little gingerly, a pleasurable ache radiating from his back side. He found a seat and put his bag on it, remaining standing and waving out the window to his love, the walking talking miracle he got to call his boyfriend, until the train pulled him out of view. Actually, Charlie thought, I might just stand all the way home. He smiled to himself.

Nick was leaning on the kitchen counter an hour or so later, his thumbs rapid firing on his mobile, confirming Charlie was safely home when Logan walked in.

“Oh hey, Nick! I wanted to ask you: what subscription or special pass do you use on your laptop? I never found your Rugby Cup on the telly all weekend!”

Nick paused and looked up, unsure what to say now he was caught up against his lie.

“But yay, your fave did well, right? Heard you two yelling yesterday and last night and this morning; congrats, mate!”

Nick blinked and swayed in place, head full of a thousand thoughts at once…

Chapter Text

After Nick changed the bedding, chagrined he had forgotten to lay down his carefully stacked towels, and got them some snacks, they settled in to watch more movies. Doing Nothing was still their favorite pastime, even if it now included a heavier rotation of Sexy Times.

At some point, Nick found himself blinking awake when he had not planned to take a nap. He looked over and the laptop was closed and charging on the desk. He rolled the other way and Charlie was sitting up against the wall with his legs draped over Nick’s lower half, hands empty and relaxed on his knees, a warm smile on his face.

“Were you staring at me? How long was I out?” he mumbled. Charlie’s smile just widened as he shrugged. Nick turned so he could see into the en suite where there was a window. “Oh, it’s dark out. Are you hungry?” Charlie shook his head. Nick lost himself in those dazzling eyes for some time before whispering, “What is it?”

Charlie’s whole being seemed to be welling with a cool light somehow; Nick didn’t have the words but it felt like Charlie was glowing, his pale skin reflecting some distant fire. “I’m just so happy…,” Charlie finally said, rather simply. His curls bounced as he tried to articulate the state he was in. “You’re just so amazing… and I’m happy.”

Nick didn’t know how to respond; he hoped his face was enough as he pushed everything he was feeling into his eyes. Charlie’s smile continued undimmed as one of his hands began rubbing Nick’s hip. His voice was a rustle in the electronic twilight of the room. “I’m so grateful we met. I’m so glad I trusted you. I can’t imagine going on this journey with anyone else.”

“Char! You’re gonna make me cry!” They grinned at each other instead. Nick dropped his gaze to Charlie’s hand doing its patterns on his flesh; his breath caught. “Y’know, I can’t imagine it being anyone else either. I never even knew I had these needs…”

Charlie’s reaction was palpable and it made Nick stop in his ramble before he really got it going. “Needs?!”

Nick’s head snapped back a bit. “Ummm, yeah! I’m not doing you a favor when we make love, ya know?!” Charlie blinked. “Jeez, Charlie, you really thought that, huh?” Nick sat up and took the fine-boned hands in his own rougher ones. “I would not be doing any of this if it didn’t also suit me, feed me, do something for me!” Charlie nodded. “I love taking care of you because that’s one of the things my heart needs to do. And I love it when you take care of me in all the ways you do. We are partners!” Nick’s voice built to that last word, leaving it ringing in Charlie’s ears as he leaned over and gathered the smaller man in his arms. They each sighed and enjoyed the comfort for several minutes.

Nick felt Charlie’s lips against his jawbone then. “Do you…,” came a soft breeze on his earlobe, “do you maybe… need… to fuck me again?”

Nick threw his head back, laughing, as Charlie drew away smirking. “Oh no you don’t; come back here, you insatiable beast!” Nick captured him by the arms and pulled them both backwards to lie flat on the bed. Charlie giggled as they grappled until he was pinned under Nick, face to face.

Then they both froze in the same split second. The brown eyes glanced down at where Charlie’s legs had just fallen to either side of Nick’s hips. They both blinked then Nick softly snorted and brought his eyes up lingeringly before leaning down to huff into Charlie’s mouth, “Yes. I think I do.” Then he rolled his hips forward until he was dragging his rapidly engorging cock over Charlie’s entire groin, both of them moaning.

Charlie’s hands flew up to clutch at Nick’s biceps. “Like this? Please?” Nick nodded. “Good, I want to watch you. Uuuuhhhhhh, aaaaaah.”

Nick’s grinding was growing more confident and he braced himself so he could keep it going while he bent down to claim Charlie’s mouth with his own. When he pulled away and stretched his back, Charlie took advantage of their height difference to start his own line of love bites on Nick’s collarbones and pecs before alternating between kissing and sucking one nipple and then the other. Nick’s noises were… gratifying.

“Okay, that’s it!” Nick reared back onto his knees and looked down at his panting, chortling boyfriend. “You stay there!” he mock-ordered with a wag of a finger but it had no power exchange in it. Charlie arched and writhed; Nick’s pupils were black holes taking it all in. He shook his head, reached up and very deliberately, provocatively lubed up the three middle fingers of his right hand. Charlie’s eyes got wide and Nick grinned.

Then he… dropped.

His body settled in between the wiry legs and kept them spread to the sides, his right hand began caressing and burrowing its way to Charlie’s back door and his mouth… planted a wet, hungry kiss right at the base of Charlie’s cock.

“HNNNNGGGGGGGGGHHHHHH!” Charlie’s hands flew to Nick’s hair but it was not clear if he was pushing Nick away or pulling him closer. Nick leaned his head back and laughed. “Hey, I’m gonna be here a while; maybe try biting the pillow.” With that, he licked a wide stripe up from the root to the tip, swirling there a moment and then smacking his lips at the honey taste of Charlie’s pre-cum.

The younger man unclenched his muscles long enough to reach behind his head and flip the pillow onto his face. His hands now firmly planted in one side of the downy center, he screamed and choked into the other side.

Nick took his sweet time, his concentration flowing back and forth between Charlie’s cock and Charlie’s ass. He shifted to find new angles, he nuzzled the crease where the lean thigh became the sharp pelvis, he listened to every sound making it through that pillow.

Finally he was satisfied with the combination of head bobs, arm thrusts, scissored fingers and desperate moans so he suddenly shifted back up to his knees and grabbed Charlie’s legs to lift them high and tight. The pillow went flying as the face of his beloved emerged, dark ruddy cheeks under dark sable curls. They locked eyes as Nick swung his hips into position.

“Wha… Are you… Need any help?” Charlie stammered.

Nick chuckled as he got more lube and then sighed as he applied it to his own throbbing member. “No, I’m ready; you are so fucking hot, do you know that?” Then he grabbed a towel, wiping his hand before shoving it under Charlie and, planting his palms on either side of the slender torso, lined himself up for penetration. His gaze returned to those ravishing eyes and they watched each other… start to lose cohesion as Nick’s cock inched its way past Charlie’s pulsing rim. “So… hot… n… tight…,” Nick grunted as he saw Charlie’s plump lips fall open wider and wider.

He shifted his arms and the angle of his hips, still going so slow until he felt Charlie’s hands stop flailing at his shoulders to firmly grab at his ass and yank him in deeper. Now Nick’s face was wide open as he socketed his pelvis under Charlie’s thighs and felt his love’s slickest skin sheathing his entire length.

Both of them succumbed to several moments of closed eyes and shuddered breaths. Charlie started nodding and then kneading Nick’s ass where his hands had remained clamped; Nick obliged him with some tentative thrusts and they both gasped, eyes flying open once more.

Nick swallowed. “Um, you… you take care of him, yeah?” His chin jutted towards Charlie’s groin. “Whenever you’re ready. I’m… I’m gonna be busy…,” and he started to move in earnest as soon as he saw his words register in Charlie’s expression.

At first, Charlie’s hands stayed, feeling the bunching of Nick’s glute muscles, and then they traveled up to marvel at the pistoning hips. All the while, his eyes traced the elements of Nick’s face: the tension in the brows, the flush of the cheeks, the wanton undulating of the lips. Nick had his eyes closed now and his neck slack, chasing his desire, shifting now and then to find a new connection of skin that would flare a new pathway of nerves.

Charlie’s moans took on a new intensity when one such shift brought Nick’s bulbous head right into his prostate and he finally dropped one of his hands to his own cock and found it slippery enough already to handle. Nick looked up, pupils completely blown out, to assess this new development and somehow redoubled his efforts, repeating that stroke which had changed their tempo.

Charlie’s head was back but he fought to keep his eyes open and trained on the face of his beloved as Nick shook and thrust and bit down on his own lip and somehow contracted and expanded all at once with an explosive groan. Charlie heard himself repeating a louder and louder litany of “yes” as his hand blurred and he followed his lover over the edge.

Nick slowed and then stilled. They each pulsed and panted. Finally Nick opened his eyes and grinned weakly into Charlie’s smile. “Yeah, I needed that,” he rumbled before easing himself out of Charlie’s ass and collapsing onto his chest. They laid like that a long time.

The next morning felt rather domestic at first. They nibbled and chatted and drank their drinks. They played footsie. Charlie laughed when he realized he hadn’t worn a single change of clothes he’d brought; a pillow was thrown. They scrolled their socials; they cuddled and kissed. They puttered.

Nick finally untied the cuffs from the footboard and sat on the edge of the bed turning them over in his hands. Charlie scootched over until they were thigh to thigh and laid his head on Nick’s shoulder. “You paid a pretty penny for those; they’re well-made,” he smiled. “I didn’t thank you for the gift yet…,” he dropped a kiss onto Nick’s warm bicep. “Thank you.”

Nick smiled and rubbed his cheek into Charlie’s hair once it landed back on his shoulder. Fingering one of the buckles, he nodded. “It was quite an adventure getting these but only the best for my babe.” He ran a thumb over the fake fur. “No chafing?”

Charlie shook his head and displayed both wrists in front of his love. Nick’s far hand traveled over to lightly wrap around one and they both shivered. They stole shy smiles at each other. Then Charlie tilted his head. “Here, see for yourself.” He shook off Nick’s fingers and claimed the cuffs, turning his torso as he applied one of them fur-side down to Nick’s near wrist. He pulled either end of the cuff, moving it back and forth across the golden skin, noting the strength of the leather as he did. Nick shivered again and Charlie looked up to find the brown eyes wide, the full lips opening.

Silently, the dark-haired man bent to find the right hole for the buckle, pulling one cuff tight into place. Nick sucked air in through his teeth at that so he repeated it on the other wrist. Nick looked up into Charlie’s face and nervously licked his lips; Charlie felt… something smoldering behind his eyes, something like a forge or molten metal. He smirked; Nick’s eyebrows just twinged and his gaze locked onto Charlie’s mouth.

Nodding a bit to himself, Charlie suddenly stood up and turned; he pointed imperiously at the headboard. “Lie down on your back, arms above your head!” Nick gulped and maneuvered himself as directed, fumbling and eager. Charlie straddled his chest and leaned to attach the ties to the taller crossbar at this end of the sturdy wooden bed frame; he was focused on getting the right amount of tension in Nick’s elbows and didn’t notice his reaction to this position until he pulled back to find Nick’s breaths coming in shallow gasps, his eyes darting between Charlie’s face and groin which was still… so close…

Charlie smirked again and ran his hands down Nick’s cheeks, squishing them slightly. “You’re so cute when you’re submissive!” Hearing that word made Nick’s breaths get bigger, more desperate; he tested the limits of his confinement. Charlie’s face was alight with delight and lust. “Hunh, guess we’re finding some new needs today…,” he leered and then pulled off Nick’s chest only to resettle on his knees between his legs.

First Charlie just looked. Nick’s hips began to twist under his stare. Then a single finger elegantly traced a spiral from Nick’s perineum over his balls and around his shaft. Nick’s hips came completely off the bed at this but it never deterred that finger’s journey one iota.

Before Nick could fully crash back down, Charlie’s hands had cradled his ass cheeks where they then remained, massaging despite being pressed into the mattress. As soon as Nick’s back was flat down again, Charlie bent his torso and took him completely into his mouth.

“FUUUUUUUUCK!” Nick was arching again, Charlie’s head and hands keeping up with him just fine, riding him up and back down again like a rollercoaster. Charlie waited like that, fully engaged but motionless, until Nick stilled under him. Then he swirled his tongue and worked his cheeks, leaving the maximum amount of saliva behind as he pulled back.

He returned to just looking. Nick’s chest was heaving and swirling red. His puppy dog eyes were locked onto his lover’s face. Charlie smiled fondly and pulled his hands out from underneath, with a departing squeeze, and then wrapped one around the length of Nick while cupping his balls with the other.

Once again, Nick arched and moaned. His arms yanked at the cuffs and his eyes rolled up and then back to watch for Charlie’s next move. Brief strokes and rolling Nick’s softest flesh around, followed by silent observant pauses. Punctuated only by the exquisite noises coming from Nick’s throat.

Nick thought he might pass out from how deliberately Charlie was working him over. He started pleading wordlessly. His beloved’s response? To dip his head down and swallow him whole once more. FUUUUUUUUCK! The wet heat, the nimble tongue; he was going to die.

In one particular moment when his surveillance had lapsed because SENSATION, suddenly it all ceased. His eyes snapped open to find Charlie rocking back to sit on his heels and take himself in hand. Nick moaned, his eyes transfixed on that gorgeous cock sitting near the lowest extremity of his visual range. He wanted all of Charlie; he wanted ALL of Charlie!

Quivering and quiet, he watched the dark-haired man reach over his head to cover one hand in lube; his hips shifted, his body… pulsed. Charlie stayed low over Nick’s chest and reached behind himself, his face just centimetres from Nick’s so every expression was clear as he… opened and stretched out his own entrance. Nick’s head fell back again, his breathing harsh in his own ears. He felt rather than saw Charlie grab, use and throw a towel to the floor.

Charlie then stood up on the bed and Nick’s eyes got even wider somehow, drinking him in. One sinewy leg and then the other found a home on either side of Nick’s torso and then Charlie was abruptly low, straddling him again, lining Nick’s crimson cock up with his hole and slowly sinking down bit by bit.

Nick strained at the cuffs, his face contorted by pleasure and want. “Aren’t you sore?” he panted as Charlie finally, fully reached his destination.

“Worth it,” laughed the younger man as he began to move and Nick lost all his words again. The sound of skin slapping skin filled the room, both of them managing only hushed moans for a spell.

At one point, Charlie fell forward and caught his hands on the side of Nick’s neck as he chased a new angle. Rearing back up, he tilted his head and then moved his thumbs over Nick’s throat, pushing slightly at the space below his Adam’s apple. Nick’s eyes nearly popped out of his head as electricity shot straight to his dick. Interesting.

Soon after that, Charlie got more lube, leaned back and grabbed his own cock again. Nick couldn’t help it; he began thrusting up in earnest, trying to slam his hips into Charlie’s ass again and again. Charlie found a height and rested his own hips there, letting Nick do all the work.

But as soon as Nick’s rhythm faltered, Charlie used his free hand to push his abdomen down until Nick stopped thrusting and Charlie could renew his own pistoning with vigor. Watching his boyfriend control and ride him so skillfully sent Nick cumming hard, sounds ripping from his chest as he emptied his balls into Charlie’s willing ass.

The motion of his hips rocking to a tiny circumference, Charlie let Nick keep pulsing where he was and focused on his hand. His head was back, his mouth was open, his eyes probably closed but Nick thought he might come again at the sight of his beloved being completely uninhibited, chasing his orgasm with Nick’s cock still filling him up.

Before Nick could really soften, Charlie was bending and choking out incoherent babble and spraying Nick’s chest and neck and face with his cum. Nick groaned appreciatively and tried to catch some on his tongue; Charlie glimpsed this and shuddered again, finally finding a single word, “Fuuuuuuuuuck!”

He let go of himself, shook his whole torso a moment and grabbed another towel; he wiped off his hand and dropped it onto Nick’s belly, quickly reaching over to undo the buckles. Nick swiftly rubbed his wrists, rubbed the towel around and away and then gathered Charlie to him. They swayed there a moment.

Charlie finally disengaged and sank with a soft moan to one side, turning and tucking himself into Nick, grabbing a fresh towel along the way to press between his legs. He sighed happily and ran a finger through Nick’s fringe. “You okay? There were some new things in there we never talked about… Did I cross any boundaries?”

Nick’s breathing was still settling so he took a moment to return the affection with his own hand in Charlie’s mop of ringlets. He shook his head after some reflection. “No, that was all lovely, thank you. We should talk about it later though… I might need to make my own list… of stuff you’re gonna do to me…” Charlie pulled in his lips and let the delight dancing in his eyes do all the talking for a while.

Later as they packed and cleaned together, it was Charlie’s turn to untie the cuffs and sit on the edge of the bed with them. Finally dressed again and already a little melancholy about his impending departure, he let his mind wander back over these three days and then off into the future as he played with the midnight-black leather and fur contraption. His brain whirred…

Chapter Text

The dark-haired young man sagged into the room and flopped onto the queen-sized bed next to the broad-shouldered one already stretched out and snoring there. Smiling softly, he let his body unwind from a long day… month… year…

He’d passed all his exams! He’d gotten into the same uni as Nick! And some others! He’d graduated secondary! He’d survived David Nelson’s “banter” and swam shirtless in Menorca! And he had… somehow… with Nick and Geoff and Sarah’s support, made decisions about his college years.

His head turned. The walls were still bare but the bed was made and the clothes were in the dressers. Their own place… A cheap one bedroom flat with a tiny table for two in between the tiny kitchen and the tiny living room… But theirs… just theirs… together.

He shook his head, tears of fatigue and relief and gratitude welling up again. They fell down his cheeks into the mattress. This was huge. This was a safe place he could post his meal plans and his time tables on the fridge and get nothing but unconditional support as he navigated his recovery AND an engineering degree.

They have two weeks before Nick’s birthday, which includes hosting their first get-together here, and three weeks before classes start up. Time enough to finish unpacking, decorate and settle in to their new routine. Time enough to consummate some more of Nick’s list they’d been exploring off and on for three months? Charlie hoped so!

For now, he curled onto his side and up against Nick; he let the soft rumbling soothe his brain into silence and they both slept the sleep of the weary. When Nick startled awake some time later, Charlie startled too, both of them muddled by the unfamiliar setting and the change in lighting. It had become evening and they fumbled to find light switches before taking turns in the loo and reconvening at the table.

Nick smiled brightly as he slid across from Charlie who had his chin on his hands, elbows on the table. They blinked happily at each other for a long beat, grins slowly spreading wider and wider until they both broke into giggles about the same instant. Nick ended up throwing his arms wide and nearly yelling, “OUR! PLACE!”

Charlie’s eyes gleamed. “I KNOW!” He shook his head, falling back in his chair practically wiggling with excitement. His chest heaved with a few more soft chuckles. “I still can’t quite believe it… Your mum… she’s amazing.”

Nick nodded, still grinning. “I’m so glad you let her arrange that family meeting; I know…,” he reached across and claimed one of Charlie’s hands in his own, “I know she appreciates your trust.” Their eyes locked and they glowed at each other a while longer before Nick offered to make a simple dinner from the supplies they’d managed to lay in so far.

Charlie nibbled and puttered intermittently whereas Nick tucked in and then found some projects to do while the younger man did his circuits around the flat. Finally Charlie was cleaning up in the kitchen when Nick turned from getting the gaming equipment set up by the couch, pleased to see the food all eaten.

They confirmed the console was working and played MarioKart for a while but soon found themselves making out instead. Not long after that, Charlie was on his knees with his head buried in Nick’s lap. And then in a little while, Nick stripped his love and laid him out right there on the sofa to worship Charlie’s entire body with his mouth.

When they’d each recovered, Nick stood and gathered the discarded clothes before extending one hand to help lift Charlie to his feet, motioning that he should accompany him to the bedroom. “Mmmmm, one down and four to go…” he smirked. One dark eyebrow shot up in response. “Breaking in our new place,” Nick leered at him, “one room at a time…”

Charlie’s startled laugh filled up the whole flat as he stepped through the doorway. “Oh! Is that what we’re doing?! Okay… but four more rooms?! We just covered the entire living area?! So here in the bedroom, in the toilet and where else?!”

Nick looked around for a hamper which had not found its proper place yet, shrugged and threw Charlie’s clothes on the floor before shedding his own and adding them to the pile. “No no! We still have the dining room and kitchen to go!”

Charlie sputtered as he headed to brush his teeth. “They’re all one room!” Nick shrugged, walked over and snagged his fingertips on the top of the door frame, leaning his naked torso into the small bathroom right where Charlie could appreciate the reflection of him while at the sink. Charlie rolled his eyes but then openly and affectionately ogled him.

Dropping his toothbrush into the Lilo & Stitch mug, he stepped over to the tub and started the water. “Care to cross off another room tonight?” he winked. Nick grinned and rushed through his own dental hygiene before squeezing in next to his boyfriend. Luckily they’d already unpacked the soap and they put it to good use, first with their hands slowly bringing each other to another release and then to actually clean up. Nick thought this was all SO much better than dorm flatmates as he helped rinse Charlie’s back.

Finally they returned to bed and spooned up together. Charlie nuzzled into Nick’s shoulder blades, arm around his waist. “I still can’t believe this is my life now,” he mumbled. Nick hummed sleepily. Closing his eyes and waiting for dreams to take him, Charlie let his mind wander back to Menorca…

——————

Leaving their room defiantly in just his swimming trunks, Charlie strutted out to the table on the patio. There he spent a moment considering the five different kinds of sunscreen Sarah and her sister had brought. Picking up a bottle of spray-on, he handed it to Nick and turned around to present his back for application. They each made short work of getting all exposed skin covered in the stuff. While they waited for it to dry, Charlie grabbed their water bottles from the table and went inside to the kitchen to top them off, a bemused Nick trailing in his wake to watch him navigate the house with other people in it; Charlie kept his eyes from making direct contact with anyone but his shoulders stayed proudly back the whole time. Nick’s uncle looked surprised but didn’t say anything; Sarah exchanged a delighted glance with her son, knowing without words what a breakthrough this was for Charlie.

When they returned to the patio, the twins were already in the water playing; Charlie dove head-first into the deep end with no visible hesitation and then swam over to join them, his strokes capable enough. Nick shook his head in wonder as he walked around to the steps.

As they both splashed and lifted the kids to throw them back into the water, Nick’s face grew sore from grinning so much. He loved seeing Charlie like this; he thought his heart might burst. Finally the kids were called to go eat and Nick watched as Charlie turned and knifed back to the deep end. He found himself following again.

Catching up to him just as he turned back around, Nick swam right up and used one arm to catch the edge of the pool and the other to grasp his boyfriend around the waist and pull him in for a kiss. Charlie clung to him and returned it enthusiastically. They floated back a little, giggling and beaming at each other.

“I haven’t been swimming since I was little; I’m glad I remembered some of my lessons!” Charlie chortled. “I can’t believe how good this feels,” one hand trailing around the two of them at the surface of the water.

Nick pecked him on the cheek. “I am so proud of you,” he whispered, nuzzling at Charlie’s neck.

“OI, GET A ROOM!” Both of their heads whipped around to see David coming out of the villa, alone.

Their bodies stilled, their faces became masks, their eyes bored into him. “Actually we have a room,” Charlie suddenly chirped. And then smirked as his arms resumed pulling Nick’s torso even closer to lay his head on one broad shoulder where he could still fix his eyes on David’s face.

David’s mouth opened and then closed a few times, before he turned on his heel and practically stomped his way back inside.

Nick’s face was all incredulous delight as he bounced Charlie and squeezed him tighter. “Look at you go, you cheeky bastard! Can it really be that easy to shut him up?!”

Charlie laughed breathlessly then pulled back to give his head a little shake. “I’m sure he’ll say something else but I’m just glad he’s gone now. Race me to the other end?” Without waiting for an answer, he pulled free of the other’s arms altogether and kicked off the wall. Nick sputtered and grinned and dove after him.

Later they shared a shower to rinse off the sunscreen and chlorine. A few minutes in, they were already kissing and then Nick picked up the younger man and pinned him against the tile with the slim legs around the wide waist. “You are…,” kiss, “so fucking sexy,” nibble, “Charlie Spring!” Dark curls thrown back, all Charlie could do was moan as Nick started grinding their groins together.

His strong hands moved from Charlie’s hips bit by bit until they were cupping and kneading the muscles of his ass. Then Nick shifted slightly before he simultaneously thrust his tongue down Charlie’s throat and brushed some of his fingertips between Charlie’s cheeks. The effect on the smaller man was profound and Nick felt them both quivering violently.

He reared back and gasped out, “It’s too slippery in here. Let’s go to bed.” Charlie nodded and was carefully lowered to stand on his own again. But before Nick could shut off the flow, he found the other man’s hands on his hips turning his own bum into the water. Leaning into Nick’s chest, Charlie reached around and spread the well-developed glutes apart and brushed between them with his own fingertips. Nick moaned down into Charlie’s neck.

Stepping back with a devastatingly lecherous look on his face, Charlie used Nick’s hips as levers to pivot him again and then forcefully pushed on Nick’s back so he bent and grasped at the wall until Charlie seemed satisfied with the angle. At which point, the dark-haired man dropped into a crouch and buried his face in Nick’s ass, his tongue circling and probing furiously.

Nick’s groan was nearly a shout and he bent further, giving Charlie all the access he wanted. His hands splayed against the tile, he rested his forehead there too and focused on the new sensations radiating from his rear end.

When his knees started wobbling and his noises were mostly whines, Nick finally felt and heard Charlie fall back with a wet gasp. Both of them straightened up and Nick wrenched the faucet off like it owed him money; Charlie was wiping one elegant hand across his chin and grinning. Without saying a word, he turned and grabbed towels for both of them, threw one at Nick and stalked out of the room without so much as a backwards glance.

Once again today, Nick was running after him, feeling like a foolish puppy dog begging for more treats. He didn’t exactly bother drying all the way off; he gave his head, shoulders and back a quick rub and then laid the towel across part of the bed before climbing onto it on his hands and knees. He looked over at Charlie who was watching him steadily with an unreadable, almost distant look in his eyes - something was burning there behind the light. Nick tried and failed to quell the urge to wiggle his ass at this man. A small twitch caught the corner of Charlie’s lips at that but he just kept thoroughly drying off every inch of his naked body.

Nick didn’t know what to do. He felt like a big raw bundle of Need. They had talked about rimming by now but he’d been waiting for Charlie to make the first move and now he had, well… Nick was gonna need a lot more of that please. After another wiggle failed to move Charlie from his spot, Nick’s head flopped down to the bed with a sad moan, leaving his lower end jutting out rather awkwardly, he felt. But he didn’t even care… He just wanted Charlie, all of Charlie, however Charlie wanted him.

He closed his eyes and tried to steady his breathing. Which was, again, an unmitigated failure as soon he felt those capable hands on his hips; he heard himself give another one of those groan-shouts and then Charlie’s subsequent chuckle. The hands disappeared and he heard rustling.

“Here,” Charlie said as he came into view holding a clean pair of Nick’s gym socks folded up into his characteristic dumbbell shape. Nick raised his head and blinked as it came closer before realizing and opening his mouth. He looked at Charlie’s smirking face as the cotton pressed down on his tongue and he sank his teeth into it. His eyes could not be any wider; his head dropped and he moaned, muffled, into the fabric. Bolts of electricity shot through him straight to his dick.

The hands took up their place on his hips again. They pulled on him. He moaned again and then yelled into the gag as Charlie’s tongue resumed its assault on his entrance without any additional warning or build up. Nick sank onto his arms, too weak to do anything but leave his ass hanging, open to whatever Charlie had planned.

Soon they were rocking and moaning together and, just as Nick was thoroughly breached by Charlie’s tongue for the first time, he also felt one lean hand wrap around the head of his cock and swirl the slick it found there. Nothing else was needed; Nick was jolted by the intensity of his orgasm. He shuddered and screamed into the mattress. He felt Charlie continue to stab and swirl him through the whole peak, which seemed to go on forever. Finally all the touches were withdrawn and he collapsed onto his side, mostly off the towel.

Instantly Charlie was there, folding it around Nick’s spill and using the corners to wipe both of them clean before he joined Nick on the bed, mirroring his position so they ended up face to face. Nick panted and wheezed as Charlie rolled and smacked his lips so much they both started giggling.

When he could breathe again, Nick trailed one hand down the narrow chest and looked up through his lashes, his eyebrows making it a question. Charlie shook his head with a smile. “I’m okay for now; I think I want to… tamp it down a little while longer.”

Nick nodded and wrapped him into his chest, nuzzling into his curls. “I’ve been watching you… smolder all afternoon. It’s really… well… hot!” Charlie huffed with fond exasperation. “What?! I don’t have better words yet; this is a new side of you.” Charlie pulled back to make eye contact, a little hesitantly. “I like it! No, I love it. I love you.” Reassured, Charlie burrowed back into Nick’s chest and they dozed off.

A couple of hours later, Nick found himself sitting on the edge of the bed with Charlie draped over his back watching him scroll through pictures of sex toys in his mobile’s browser. Some he pointed out appreciatively, some got a firm “not interested” and others made them both laugh; Charlie didn’t say much but Nick could almost hear that beautiful brain at work.

A couple of days later, Charlie finally let Nick do a reciprocal face plant when they had the villa to themselves; Nick was delighted to learn he enjoyed being “the diner” as much as he had enjoyed being “the dinner”. They mentally added more to the “yes” side of the Tiny Choices results list.

————————

The first Saturday in September dawned sunny and clear. After their morning cuppa, Nick and Charlie stayed at the little dining table, talking over party plans and confirming their place was as ready as could be for that evening. “Do I get to investigate the rest of my present yet?” Nick said with a poke as he stood up and then grabbed both their mugs. Charlie just crossed his arms and glared at him. “Fine! Fine, I know you said tomorrow; I’m just so curious!!”

Placing the mugs in the sink, Nick took three steps and poked his head into their bedroom. “It’s a fine cabinet, isn’t it? You’ll have to show me that shop.” He shook his head and turned back to Charlie with a smirk. “And given you’ve added four more decorative canisters on top of it right next to the lube, you can’t blame me for wanting to know the contents of all that!” His arm waved in the direction of the bed.

Charlie’s lips pulled to the side and his eyes gleamed but he still didn’t say anything. Nick’s shoulders slumped. “FINE! Well… guess I’ll have to scratch my itch by giving you my present then…”

Charlie sat back. “WOT? You can’t get me a present; it’s your birthday this week!” Nick just grinned and stepped out of view; Charlie could hear him rustling in the closet on the near wall. When he stepped back into the kitchen, he was holding a flat gift box.

He returned to the table and sat, sliding it across to Charlie. “I saw this when I was getting the new towels and I knew it had to be yours but it really is a present for myself, I promise.” He dropped his hands to his lap and literally quivered in anticipation.

Charlie just shook his head slowly and opened the box; he pulled back white tissue paper to find a silky garment of the richest cobalt blue he’d ever seen on fabric. He lifted it up to find it was a robe he thought might hit him at the knee. “Nick,” he breathed, “it is gorgeous! How is this a present for you?!”

Nick’s face looked like it might split in half, he was grinning so widely. “Because I get to look at you wearing it… and nothing else on…,” he said waggling an eyebrow. Charlie scoffed and then smiled at him. Nodding, he stood and took it into the bedroom to find somewhere to hang it.

When he came back, he walked up behind where Nick had remained at the table and was now scrolling through his socials. He wrapped his arms around Nick’s torso, leaned down to drop several kisses along his neck and whispered, “Thank you.” Then he straightened and clucked at his beloved, “Come on then, we have some food to go buy!”

The next morning, Charlie was the first one up, which was not usually the case. He puttered in the kitchen after his time in the loo; he prepared everything Nick might want and smiled, remembering how they’d managed to host their friends and family in this one room. Well, technically he supposed the party had spilled into their room and out in the stairway a bit.

He’d already collected and taken out all the bags of rubbish and recycling before Nick made his appearance, his cotton trunks and shirt slightly too small on him, leaving a delicious strip of bare skin for Charlie to run his fingers across.

Nick smiled and sat down at the table, still half-asleep; Charlie brought him the paracetamol and a big glass of water while the coffee steeped and the bread toasted. When everything was ready, they sat quietly and contentedly together, sipping and nibbling until they felt more human.

Nick insisted on helping put the flat back to rights after that but it didn’t take much; their guests had largely been considerate, of course. They cuddled on the couch together for a while, catching up on all the pictures and posts from the night before.

Suddenly Nick sat up and slapped his hands loudly on his bare knees. “Right! Time for my present!” He turned and wagged a finger at Charlie. “No more putting me off, love!”

Charlie sprang up and dashed towards the bedroom, laughingly tossing over his shoulder, “That’s what you think, old man!”

“Oi! Who are you calling old?! I just turned 20!” Nick followed, not even bothering to race. He found Charlie sitting on the side of the bed close to the new bedside cabinet which had been declared the first part of his birthday celebrations when it had been hauled home by a beaming Charlie soon after they moved in.

Nick had already admired the piece, a sleek mid-century modern Danish-style wooden cabinet on simple legs that did not seem strong enough to hold it up. It was a little banged up but Nick assumed the sliding door on the front still worked; Charlie had threatened him not to open it upon pain of death.

The canisters along the top had appeared more recently but bore the same pronouncement of doom. Other than the one he himself had found when he was trying to disguise the giant pump-bottle of lube he figured would be a standard part of their bedroom forever. He was still chuffed at how well it worked with its extra-tall lid. It must have been someone’s pantry organizer or something.

Nick appreciated once more the way Charlie had managed to source the others from various charity shops in the area in such a way that the group all complemented each other. It looked like an artful tableau, just decorating this one side of their room. But Charlie had assured him they were practical too.

Nick sat beside his love and gestured at the corner. “Proceed… please.” Charlie smiled and leaned over for a kiss first.

“Okay yes, you can have more of your present today,” he started and, overriding Nick’s incipient protest by simply talking louder, continued, “but not ALL of it today.” He shrugged. “That’s just how this present works,” he smiled, “and I am… not sorry about it!” He concluded with the smile becoming a full-on smirk.

Nick grinned and shook his head. “Fine. Proceed anyway… please,” he repeated. Charlie nodded and leaned the other way to slide the cabinet open, revealing a stack of clean, folded hand towels. Nick’s eyebrows shot up. “Oh! Is this whole thing for Sexy Times then?!”

Charlie just giggled and grabbed one of the canisters, opening it to reveal the leather and fur cuffs Nick had purchased in the spring. They grinned at each other. Charlie replaced the lid and placed that canister back in its spot. He pointed out the smallest of the set. “That’s the one you can’t have yet; I’m saving it for a different special occasion.” His face was oddly demure for a moment.

“Char…,” Nick grabbed his hands with one of his own and used the other hand to turn the smaller man’s face up. “You know I’d never rush you… I didn’t know these were all gifts related to our tiny choices.”

Charlie nodded, his eyes a little shiny. He swallowed. “That one… is waiting for someone new…,” his head tilted to one side, “someone emerging from where the Duke lives in his shadows, I think… I feel him sometimes,” his voice had dropped to a whisper, “and he’s a little scary but… I think… I need him to show up… and teach me more about the shadows.” His eyes returned to Nick’s from where they had wandered and they let the moment settle over them both. Nick’s face was all awe and adoration; Charlie breathed and then smiled.

He straightened up then, throwing his shoulders back. “For the other two, I’m gonna need you to strip, Nelson!” His voice barked at the end and Nick found himself straightening his own shoulders unconsciously. His face lit up and then he just blinked a moment; he felt he had a small case of emotional whiplash and he pondered anew this wonderful, complex man he loved.

Charlie raised an eyebrow and waited. Nick jumped up and was soon naked and standing in Parade Rest, just in case. Charlie smirked and nodded. Then he stood and walked around Nick, blatantly inspecting his body and his posture.

Turning and grabbing two of the canisters, he glanced in one and placed it on the bed where Nick could not see inside the now-open lid. He opened the other and pulled out another black leather contraption. Nick soon found himself wearing a classic harness that wrapped around his upper torso. It had the metal O rings in front and back with straps connecting them; it seemed very…durable. Charlie returned to his inspection, making another circle around him.

Nick’s breathing had picked up; his body was twitching, flushing… Charlie silently smiled as he paused in front of the birthday boy.

He made deliberate eye contact. Nick could feel his skin soothing down as a result, ripples of mutual trust flowing from Charlie all the way to Nick’s toes.

Charlie bided his time. When their breathing had synced, he asked quietly, “You ready?”

Nick nodded. “I’m yours,” he said simply. They smiled at each other. Charlie turned and pulled out one more contraption. Nick’s breath caught in his throat. It was the gag he’d stuttered over while they browsed online in Menorca…

He felt his knees wobble but he remained upright and opened his jaw. Charlie settled the mouthpiece in place and walked around Nick again fastening the straps. Then he was behind Nick, his hands settling onto the wide hips as Nick adjusted to the flood of sensations.

Charlie then pushed Nick to take a step to the side so he aligned with the mirror across the bed, hanging from the far closet door which just missed Charlie’s drums in the corner when it was opened. Nick’s breathing got decidedly ragged as he saw himself, naked and erect and quivering, the harness setting off his pecs nicely, the gag… its jet black silicone lips, luscious and overblown and erotic as hell keeping his throat, where he could see his pulse pounding… keeping his throat… open… available…

Nick closed his eyes and groaned. His own lips were already feeling the stretch; he adjusted them and tried to breathe through his nose. He felt Charlie step close, just letting the front of himself make gentle contact all along Nick’s back slightly to one side. They breathed.

When Charlie was confident it was safe to resume, he grabbed hold of the two bottom back straps of the harness and maneuvered Nick so he was sitting on the bed again. He stepped back and noted the drool collecting below the gag. He reached down and grabbed a towel, handing it to Nick.

“Here, if you want.” Without waiting to see Nick’s decision, he turned and shed his own clothes, adding them to the hamper Nick had placed just inside the near closet. When he turned back, Nick’s eyes shot to his groin and Charlie grabbed his own cock, pulling and stroking it as it continued to engorge. Nick moaned and clutched at the towel in his lap. Charlie nodded and stepped closer.

“You may use your hands today, Nelson. Including,” he held up a finger and brought it to the special buckle on the back of the gag, “taking this off if need be. Do you understand?” Nick nodded vigorously and promptly latched both hands onto Charlie’s hips. Charlie’s hands strayed to Nick’s shoulders, his arms hanging loose. He tilted his head back. “You may begin.”

Nick realized he had more leeway than usual; this was not their typical Corporal/Cadet dynamic. He was grateful for his insightful, considerate boyfriend; he was already a little overwhelmed. He and Charlie had previously admitted to each other they would never be full-time kinksters; this gag was proof enough they were right. It made him feel things, for sure, but it made him feel too many things and he was going to need limits on its use.

While this all played through his head, Nick found he had already leaned forward and worked the silicone lips around the head of Charlie’s cock. Suddenly he wasn’t thinking at all anymore, just desperately trying to take in more and actually taste that honey on his tongue. Ooooh, was he whining? He pulled Charlie’s ass into a better position and tried again.

He managed to find some rhythm and enjoy the deliciousness which was his beloved’s flesh but, after a few minutes, he pulled back and reached behind and above to release the gag. As he dropped it to the floor, he smiled up at his lover and then ran his face across Charlie’s belly, smearing all the spit and pre-cum around.

Charlie just chuckled and stepped back. He crooked one finger, indicating Nick should rise which he quickly did. Charlie was pleased to see Nick’s cock was enjoying the day so far. He stooped and pulled a basket out from under the bed, picking up its contents and throwing it across the duvet. This sex blanket might actually have been his favorite discovery from their Menorca browsing; no more sleeping on the wet spot!

Turning, he pointed at the bed. “Hands and knees, now!” he barked and Nick jumped to comply. Charlie ran his hands all over Nick’s shivering body. But he didn’t use his mouth until, without warning, he dove into Nick’s ass. His hands pulled the cheeks apart and he was licking and then spearing Nick’s bud over and over, making the larger man cry out, his face sinking to the mattress.

Before he could settle into that position however, he felt Charlie tugging on those harness straps again and he tried to understand where he was meant to go. It wasn’t until Charlie’s mouth let up that Nick could even begin to think once more. Oh, he was meant to stay more upright. How?!

He heard Charlie open and pump the lube. He waited. A long pause became longer. His ass wiggled. His heart fluttered. Then small mercies, those long and powerful drummer’s hands were dancing circles onto his lower back and then one slick hand dropped into place and began working Nick open.

Nick struggled to remain where he was. His whole body felt incredibly heavy and yet soaring away at the same time. He felt Charlie’s fingers scissoring and stretching his rim. He thought he might legit pass out. He didn’t recognize the sounds he was making.

“On your back!” took him by surprise but he gratefully sank and rolled into position, eyes wide and pupils blown as he saw his magnificent boyfriend start to line up their legs and his cock. Charlie must have used half the bottle of lube by now! Momentarily pausing to use and then discard a towel, Charlie resumed course and then he paused.

His eyes locked onto Nick’s. His hands came down to grasp the lower straps laying across Nick’s chest; he leveraged that to… pull his lower half in tight against Nick’s ass and start to push himself inside Nick’s body.

Eyes rolling back in his head, Nick focused on relaxing a very specific muscle and was rewarded by Charlie’s dick popping inside him and Charlie’s pelvis socketing into his own. Listening to his own whimpers, Nick could form only one semi-coherent thought: his boyfriend was balls’ deep in Nick’s ass. Wave after wave of sensation was crashing against the shores of his mind.

Which only intensified once he nodded at Charlie to move. “Holy crap, Char!” he croaked out as their groins slammed into each other, again and again. It wasn’t too long and it didn’t take much before Nick was clenching his own cock in his hand and cumming hard on the one filling him up so good. He noticed a slight hitch in Charlie’s rhythm around then but he just nodded and flailed at whatever of Charlie his hands could reach, panting and trying to remember using words.

“Yes! Uuuuuuh. Keep… going. Yes! More!” He managed to choke out his consent as Charlie chased his own desires inside Nick’s channel. The waves of sensation were still beating on the shore and, as Charlie shifted and bucked and moaned above him, Nick felt the stirrings of another round gathering inside his belly.

“What the fuck?!” Nick managed to moan out. He felt locked into place, happily trapped by the pistoning of Charlie’s hips. Their eyes strove to focus on each other and Nick could see Charlie starting to get in his head about what was happening. “Just… fuck… me!” he stuttered, reaching down to take himself in hand again. “Don’t stop! Fill me up… Hnnnngh. Yours… Yes! Yours…”

Charlie’s face got wide open on that and he bent and teetered and fell apart; hearing him cry out and feeling… FEELING the warmth filling up his ass sent Nick careening over again. They were all chaos now, no rhythm, and they rocked to a halt. Charlie convulsed, his curls vibrating like a wet dog, and pulled out of Nick only to collapse on top of him for several moments of mutual caresses and kisses and pet names murmured breathlessly.

Nick shook his head, spent lust slurring his words as he roused just enough from an afterglow like no other before it, to softly sing “happy birthday to me!” Charlie’s giggle was still winded but he was able to sit up more and gaze fondly at his beloved who was quickly succumbing to a nap.

Charlie pulled the harness off Nick, the sex blanket out from under him and wiped him off before he moved the duvet to cover his lower half, tucking him in with one more kiss. He turned and inspected the harness; yep, it needed some cleaning so he went to take care of that and the gag as well in the loo. Then he took a quick shower before slipping on his new sapphire-colored robe and heading out to the kitchen, shutting the door behind him to let his fucked-out boyfriend recover.

Soon he was sitting on the couch, replaying the whole scene in his mind to look for what had worked and what needed to change next time. He sighed and smiled and stretched.

After about an hour, the bedroom door opened and Nick stumbled out… still naked as the day he was born. It quickly became clear to Charlie that Nick had no idea; he chose to take that as an compliment. Admiring the physical specimen he was lucky to call his, he thought for the second time in a month:

God bless Sarah Nelson - for making sure this human exists.

Chapter Text

Charlie was worried; Nick had come home from his fourth business trip like a zombie. Sleep, snuggles and a day off work had helped but this was not sustainable. Not only was he getting exposed to every virus in all these trains and planes and cabs but there was clearly some other aspect of this new life eating away at him. Charlie bided his time and picked his moment.

———-

Tangled up in each other, Nick’s forehead rubbing lazy circles into his chest in his classic afterglow move, Charlie sighed contentedly. Nick finally finished nuzzling out his excess energy and settled into Charlie’s side. Running his long fingers through Nick’s hair, Charlie made those little inquisitive noises that asked without words if Nick was awake enough to talk.

Nick turned his head to prop his chin on Charlie’s chest. “Wot? Wossup?” His face was open, his smile lopsided and his eyes still half-lidded with remnants of spent lust in them. Charlie moved that hand to trace one eyebrow and down the cheek, wonder and ardor both clear in his expression.

“Mmmmm, you are so…,” he murmured, “so lovely.” They smiled at each other. “And maybe you’re not ready to talk about it but I’m worried this new job is taking too much out of you with all the travel…,” Nick’s face had lost its smile but he nodded reassuringly and tried to bring it back as Charlie’s voice trailed off. “Ok so I just want you to know I’m here to help if you want… to talk about it…”

Nick just dropped a kiss onto Charlie’s chest and nuzzled back into his side, nodding sleepily. “Ok… later…”

—————-

When Nick got home, he could hear Charlie’s muffled drum kit and he sighed. He toed off his trainers and left them where they landed. His mobile, wallet and keys managed to find the side table where they belonged but his coat ended up on the dining room chair, his trousers in the bedroom doorway and his button-down on the mattress.

He flopped on the bed face down and waited for his beloved to notice he was home early. Charlie’s headphones were on and his eyes were closed, his face to the corner where they had made the kit work in their tiny flat.

Nick sighed again and rolled over dramatically. Charlie’s startled yelp had him sitting up and apologizing before he was even aware he was doing it.

“Jesus, Nick! You nearly gave me a heart attack! Wait, why are you home already?! Are you okay?” Charlie stowed his stuff and joined Nick on the bed, pulling him in close and digging his strong fingers into several spots along Nick’s shoulders. Nick burrowed into Charlie’s neck and practically purred.

“Mmmmm, later. Don’t stop.” As Charlie bemusedly worked his way through the small knots of tension, Nick began softly kissing the side of his neck, behind his ear, his temple. Finally Charlie had to give up because the angle was all wrong but Nick silenced his question before it could form, brushing their lips together with feathery sideways strokes at first before pressing in and tilting to slot them together.

Some timeless time later, Charlie sat up, one of his hands tracing the line of Nick’s leg up to his hip and flank before he raised it to his own face and wiped at his chin. “Better?” he smiled at his upside-down love where Nick’s fringe was still tickling his thighs. Nick’s grin as he rolled onto his back and mirrored Charlie’s chin wipe was answer enough.

Charlie scootched over to lean against the headboard and patted the pillow next to him. “Come on then.” Nick huffed up into a seated position from the diagonal line they had made and turned 180 degrees before backing up to take the proffered spot. He leaned into Charlie’s open arms and their bodies fit together this way perfectly as well. Nick closed his eyes and breathed deeply, gratefully.

Charlie stroked his back lightly, occasionally drawing a line with a fingernail just to feel Nick’s response; he waited, peacefully.

When Nick pulled back to sit up, they made eye contact easily, all gentle smiles. Nick squared up his shoulders and nodded. “I’m sent off again Monday, gone all week. The full northern circuit, by myself…”

Charlie’s eyes widened. “That’s a big deal,” he said softly. “They trust you a lot.” Nick nodded and looked away, one hand toying with the duvet edge.

“You know I like this company, Char; I like the work.” He smiled. “Who knew being a rugby lad would come in so handy? I spend most of my time just chatting with people about their local sports teams and getting PAID for it?!” He shook his head a little and added, a trifle wistfully, “I’m so lucky…”

Charlie’s head tilted at that. “You spend most of your time traveling to each restaurant,” he noted, “and while you’re getting paid for that time too, isn’t it tiring?”

Nick shook his head. “No, not really; I’m usually in a conversation then too. If I had to take a car everywhere, that would suck but I like the train rides and stuff.”

Charlie narrowed his eyes. “Then why…,” his hand floating up to brush against Nick’s bicep, “were you so worn out the last few times you got back?” Nick’s head dropped and a moment later he shrugged.

Charlie’s lips pulled to one side as his hand moved up to Nick’s head and began scratching lightly all over his scalp. Nick pushed into it like an eager puppy; that relaxed both of them again and soon they were giggling. Nick ended up stretching and then collapsing back into the slender arms. He laid his ear on Charlie’s chest and felt the deeper drumming of his beloved.

“I’m just… lonely… out there…,” came the whisper. “The evenings… they’re so long and I don’t want to keep you on FaceTime more than I already do…” Charlie’s arms tightened around the broad back. “And I don’t sleep well without you.”

Now the hard thing was out in the open, they both sat quietly a long while, Charlie’s head sometimes nodding and Nick rumbling and nuzzling into the hollow of Charlie’s neck.

“What if…,” the dark-haired man offered and then stalled. “Sor… Hrmmm.” Sigh. “Are you venting or asking for help?” Nick smiled and sat back again, nodding for him to continue. Charlie returned his smile and dipped his chin in agreement.

“What if we mixed it up better? Sometimes we chat while we eat like we already do but sometimes we save it for bedtime and… ummmm…” Nick was already grinning before Charlie could even say it or wink or anything so he just shrugged and smirked. “I bet you’d sleep better!”

Nick nodded enthusiastically. “The one time we… yeah, that worked great! Best sleep I’ve had on the road so far!” Now it was Charlie’s turn to grin.

“Okay, that’s one change we should definitely make then!” He gave a decisive jab in the air with one hand. Nick just gazed at him fondly so Charlie picked up the thread again. “And when we’re not FaceTiming, what is something new you can try? You said the evenings are long…,” Charlie’s voice trailed off and his face fell. “Oooh, you’re gonna miss trivia night at the Hearth next week; that’s a first.” They both sighed.

Charlie’s eyes roamed around the room while Nick went back to playing with the duvet. He took in their wall of framed photos, special moments captured with friends and family over the years, Nick’s graduation from uni being the most recent addition.

“Okay, here’s what we’re gonna do.” His voice was confident, his face calm. Nick looked up and settled back to hear this. “I am going to make dinner dates with different friends all next week, in person or video calls.” Nick opened his mouth to protest but Charlie just raised one hand and smiled reassuringly. “I know, I like our dinners too and that works fine when you’re gone one or two nights but making sure I eat is not your job and I could stand to diversify my support system with that a little better.” Nick wrinkled his lips and nodded.

“So then we FaceTime at bedtime,” they smirked at each other, “and you,” Charlie leaned his forehead at Nick, “go out for dinner instead of mopeing around some generic hotel room.” Nick frowned. “No, I’m serious. You do better when you’re with people so go find your people! It’s not like they’re sending you into remote areas; I bet there’s a decent pub or gay bar everywhere you go.”

Nick rocked back at that. “You want me out at gay bars when I’m away?!”

Charlie smiled and rolled his eyes. “Despite your impressions of our local scene, I am assured they are not all meat markets, you oaf!” They both chuckled, some of the same past experiences reeling out behind their eyes.

“Anyway, worst case scenario: you waste a couple hours chatting up some sad bar flies,” Nick’s eyebrows went up as he pondered that, “making their day by the way,” matching smiles, “and best case, you wind up with new friends all over the country!” Charlie waved his hand towards the wall showcasing their memories and Nick’s eyes followed the gesture; he sat there a beat, looking over the faces of their loved ones.

He began nodding and turned back to Charlie. “Mix it up… Diversify…,” their heads both bobbing now, “yeah… Right. Because as much as we mean to each other, we can’t be everything; that’s not fair… to either of us.” Charlie’s nods grew more pronounced. “Okay…,” big deep breaths, “I will try that.” The brown eyes traced their way up Charlie’s face, twinkling. “I love your brain.” Their smiles matching once more, they leaned in for a kiss at the same moment.

———————

[eight years later]

Nick was on another train, he wasn’t even sure which one at the moment. He glanced around but the cabin was empty except for himself. He sighed and pulled out his mobile. Checking the time, he opened his Contacts and scrolled to a section where all the last names started with a rainbow emoji. Some also held names, some had color-coded hearts, some included pronouns if he struggled to remember.

First he fired off a text to Norene asking if she could meet in two weeks, knowing she had to arrange with her husband ahead of time to get an evening away from the kids; he smiled as he remembered the time she admitted how much their visits meant to her, helping her feel more valid as bisexual and queer.

Then he opened the group chat called Guncles and told Matt and his two husbands about his interview for the regional manager position.

His thumb found the messages from Kate and he sent her the most recent picture of him and Charlie hugging at trivia night. He followed up:

|Our team won last week! See, I don’t always reach out just when there’s a problem! ;)|

He shook his head a little ruefully; her relationship advice was just the best but he couldn’t treat his polyam friends like his own personal agony aunties. He nodded; he would do better.

Then he checked on Johnny, asking how it was going finding a new therapist. His brow creased. He worried about the young demiboy; he hadn’t intended to wind up as a mentor but that seemed to be his role in their friendship for now.

After checking his calendar and noting which city this train was dropping him in, he sent off one last text to Mateo and Larry:

|Sorry it’s last minute but are you free for dinner at the Black Cat tonight? Just dinner XD|

Nick’s real face was grinning just like the text face. In the four months since he’d met them, they’d developed quite a fun friendship. The couple flirted with Nick shamelessly, knowing it was ineffective, and he enjoyed teasing them about it.

Settling back, he closed his eyes for a minute. But then the mobile still in his hand started buzzing as his flurry of outreach bore fruit. His eyes dancing, his thumbs racing, Nick reconnected with his long-distance queer family.

Back at home, Charlie worried. About the mortgage, about the house needing a new roof, about Daisy digging under the fence again. But not about this, not anymore.

Chapter Text

I….

seethe…

I’ve been in your belly all these years… feeding on the rage you swallow…

I was a bitter ball of bile for a long time but I have been changing. We…

have been changing.

I touch a finger to the mirror. Look at us. It’s not me there, not yet; something is missing, something in the eyes. But I’m not far now. You have my mouth when it curls like this. You’re a handsome bastard, you know that? No? I do…

————————

Charlie and his new friend from Maths 114 are out shopping just for fun, browsing the Halloween section of the big box store when it strikes him, not for the first time, how well he’s settling into uni life. What an incredible difference it makes, coming home to Nick, how easy it is to unwind from whatever the day brought. How easy it is to be himself in class, joining in the discussions and chatting after lectures.

Charlies smiles and stretches his back, glancing past the feather boas and plastic masks, undecided on his costume for this year. Knowing he and Nick will have several options of festivities to attend, if they want.

His eyes land on a packet of greasepaint in stick form. The images printed on the surrounding cardboard show a clown and a vampire but Charlie is stuck on the black stick to one side inside the clamshell. He steps over and rummages through the bin until he finds a similar package just for monsters. This one has two black sticks as well as two white and a greenish gray.

Something stirs in his belly, something coiling.

Charlie tilts his head…

and adds the monster set to his basket.

Later back at home, he looks at it by the bathroom sink and then glances at the mirror. He winks at his reflection… and then blinks, a little confused.

Shaking his head, he opens the drawer which is “his” just above “Nick’s” and drops the greasepaint into it from a suddenly nerveless hand. He quickly shuts the drawer and goes in search of his boyfriend or a cuppa, whichever he finds first.

Chapter Text

It was a chilly morning in November when Nick learned something interesting about their tiny flat. The water heater being tucked into a corner of the kitchen was… fine but the fact that it radiated heat near the floor caught his attention when he went to make his first cuppa and felt it on his ankles.

Charlie found him sitting at the little table staring blankly into that corner, with its jumble of pipes and clamps, some time later. “What is it?” Nick shook the fog from his face and just smiled and raised his mug to “cheers” his boyfriend.

“Nothing,” he said easily but Charlie swore he saw a gleam in the brown eyes as they both sipped their tea.

Later that day, Nick was reviewing Charlie’s latest calendars on the fridge. “Hey hon,” his voice stalling Charlie’s passage between rooms, “these time blocks for class and study and chores and down time…”

“Yeah?”

“Geoff has you doing these for anxiety, right?”

“Right. Only now I’m working with Cliff here in town.”

“Oh, right. So does Sexy Times count as Down Time or does it throw you off sometimes?”

At that, Charlie turned from what he’d been looking at on his mobile. “WOT?!”

Nick smirked. “You’ve blocked off Down Time; is that usually when we get frisky? Are you scheduling our… sexscapades without telling me?”

Charlie blinked and then scowled. “Do not call it that, you dork!”

“Sexventures?”

“No!”

“Sex… shanagins?”

“STOP IT!” They were both laughing by now; Nick caught the smaller man by the waist and spun him into his arms, slotting Charlie’s back against his chest. He nuzzled against the dark curls, delighting in the feel and scent of his beloved.

“What are you on about anyway?” Charlie smiled as he asked and rubbed his head back into Nick.

“Well…,” Nick languidly took Charlie’s hand and spun him back out in front, like a wedding reception dance move. “Say I was planning something…,” he spun him back in for a kiss. “Instead of being spontaneous or waiting for you to initiate…,” back out with a pause where he practically bowed, “would you like me to…,” head tilt, “tell you or…,” gestures at fridge, “just fit it into a block already called Down Time on there?”

“Oh,” Charlie said softly, stepping in to lay a hand suggestively on the broad chest. “Hmmmm. Well, you can generally be spontaneous, like now,” he leaned in and slowly kissed Nick. “And if I can’t respond, I’ll tell you,” he smiled as he pulled back. Then his head tilted. “But if you mean a whole scene with new stuff in it,” he pursed his lips before nodding, “Yeah, I think it would help if you gave me a heads up. Not the details if you don’t want but just that the time is spoken for.” His eyes fell to where his hand was, near Nick’s collarbone. “Predictability helps,” Nick nodded along, “and the Shadows fade when I feel in control.”

Nick smiled kindly and squeezed Charlie even tighter. “I love living with you,” he whispered. Charlie’s eyes snapped back up, widening. “Don’t give me that look! I mean it! I love getting to know even more about you. I love getting to see all this up close.”

Charlie’s face had softened but now was his turn to smirk. “All this, eh? And what is all this then?”

Nick’s delighted grin crinkled his eyes. “Your brain at work, for one!” Charlie just rolled his eyes. “It’s true! How you structure your life! How you… manage those Shadows and find the light almost every day…,” both of them lost in each other’s eyes now, “Being around you nearly 24/7 is like a dream, Char. I love you so much.”

Charlie leaned in and kissed him again. “I love you too. Now was this spontaneous time going somewhere or what?”

Nick stuck his tongue out and Charlie just giggled. The taller man glanced back at the fridge and shrugged. “Okay, Sunday’s down time block - I’m claiming that for a new… Sex Romp.” Charlie pulled back so he could swat at Nick, who just grabbed his hand and pulled him towards the bedroom. “And, yes, this is also going somewhere right now!”

When Sunday rolled around, Charlie’s brain started a countdown clock without his permission. He could hear it all through their morning of chores and cuddles. When Nick insisted he would clean the kitchen floor but not until after lunch, an alarm sound was added. Charlie tried to shake it off; he was starting to feel a headache behind his eyeballs.

Nick set out his favorite snacks instead of a midday meal and dropped the paracetamol on the table and a kiss on top of Charlie’s head at the same time. “Is it that obvious?” Charlie softly groaned.

The older man sat down across from him and gently smiled as he opened a bag of savory biscuits and started quietly munching. Charlie downed two of the tablets with a swallow of tea and picked up his own bag to open.

“Maybe it wasn’t a good idea to tell me about your plans for later; my brain feels wound up.” Nick’s eyebrows shot up. Charlie shrugged. “Cliff wants me working on reducing the control stuff anyway. Make a plan but let it flex, as he says.”

Nick nodded thoughtfully but then his eyes started dancing. When Charlie’s expression asked the question, he just shook his head and wiggled his whole body slightly, a smile tugging one corner of his mouth. Charlie sighed. “I’m going to go lie down a while,” he said, rising and putting the empty bag in the rubbish.

Some time later, Charlie felt himself being gently stroked along one arm. He opened his eyes to see Nick peering lovingly down at him. Sitting halfway up, he rubbed his face and, glancing at the minimalist-yet-artsy wall clock, saw he’d been out almost two hours. “Hey, my head feels better,” he turned back to smile at Nick. “Oh! My! God!”

Nick grinned and offered his hand to help Charlie stand up. “You’ve been busy!” the curly-haired man sputtered. Nick nodded and stepped in close, his damp hair combed back, his naked body practically gleaming. He grabbed the bottom of the t-shirt the other man was wearing and quirked his eyebrows. Charlie nodded and raised his arms, letting his boyfriend draw the fabric up and off. He pushed his own pants off and they each tossed a garment into the hamper.

As Charlie looked on expectantly, Nick turned and opened a canister to pull out the cuffs. Charlie blinked as Nick stepped closer still, a wary look in the brown eyes. One hand came up, slowly but steadily, aiming for the back of Charlie’s neck. As he watched it, he felt his spine already starting to melt.

Nick apparently saw what he needed to see in Charlie’s reaction because his grip was firm and his face became fierce, all hard smooth lines of jaw and mouth. Charlie felt the fingers clamp just so and his knees wobbled. He nodded and let out the breath he’d been holding.

To his surprise, Nick walked him out of the bedroom where he saw their special blanket on the freshly cleaned kitchen floor by the water heater. Before he could say anything, he felt pressure from the strong hand on his neck urging him onto the blanket. He wound up on his back, head in the corner.

Nick straddled his chest and lifted up one hand and then the other, carefully buckling the cuffs on. He leaned and drew Charlie’s arms up and above his head where he then tied the leather straps to the thickest pipe connecting the water heater to the wall. Charlie’s head fell back from where he’d craned it to see what was going on and his breath caught in his throat as he realized how it felt to have Nick’s torso stretched above him. His body twitched.

Nick sat up straight, wiggled, rocking his thighs on either side of Charlie’s ribs, and waited for the pinned man to make eye contact. It took a minute as there was a lot to take in, to look over with relish. The line of Nick’s mouth rolled and wrinkled but did not actually smile.

Charlie felt his breath rattling in his throat already. He swallowed thickly as Nick leaned again, just far enough to drag a fingernail down each of Charlie’s arms onto his shoulders. Then he planted both hands on the floor and started shifting his pelvis downwards, leveraging every chance to slip and slide and bump against Charlie… or so it felt to him.

Every noise he made, he could see Nick’s lips twitching in response. Charlie arched his back as soon as it was free and moaned; Nick’s eyes flew back to meet his own, almost glaring at him. Whoops, was that too obvious? Was he already as red as Nick looked? He panted without shame, a challenge in his eyes.

Nick’s eyes became slits as he settled onto Charlie’s thighs and resumed his fingernails tracing down, from shoulders… around nipples… nudging ribs… and looping a few times on hips. Charlie’s reactions weren’t exaggerated this time and Nick was decidedly smirking now.

He placed his palms onto Charlie’s chest and began kneading his way back and forth. He pinched and gently twisted both nipples at once; Charlie heard himself whimpering as his back lifted involuntarily, over and over. Nick stayed there a long time, pushing and pulling the tender points, watching Charlie sizzle.

Finally he leaned down and started kissing and sucking and biting marks into Charlie’s flesh, shifting his knees around to the side as he went so he could get to each new patch he wanted to pattern. Charlie’s cries got more desperate, especially whenever Nick’s chest or abs grazed over his pulsing cock.

Charlie strained his arms, pushing up into the cuffs, careful not to put too much pressure on them where they were connected to the water heater. He was grunting now with every new mark and mewling in between, his hips writhing but almost always pinned under Nick’s weight somehow.

At one point, he planted his feet and forcibly pushed up into contact with more of Nick who snarled loudly and used one hand on Charlie’s chest and another on a thigh to bring him back flat on the floor. The larger man reared back and squinted at Charlie’s panting face. His expression didn’t give an inch.

Suddenly he dove down and took Charlie’s entire length deep into his throat, his hands still locked in place so Charlie found himself struggling against the full strength of someone holding him down. He almost came on the spot but Nick was just as suddenly off him again, back to staring and breathing deeply through his nose.

Charlie could not keep still. He felt out of control, in the best way. Muscles undulating and noises emanating without a brain full of thoughts.

Nick dove down again, licking and sucking, never repeating a motion. Now just at the tip, now the whole length, now nuzzling the soft sac, now lipping the bulb. Never enough friction all in one place.

Charlie’s legs were twisting under Nick’s hand but the instant his feet found the floor flat so he could raise his hips again, he felt Nick’s hand shift so the short fingernails were now digging into his thigh. Charlie keened and thrashed even more.

Nick’s hands were a steady pressure, arms lowering or rising depending on what Nick’s mouth was currently doing. Whenever his forearm added to the weight of the restraint, Charlie felt it. The cuffs kept him from any attempts to sit up but he felt his shoulders straining anyway. Every part of him wanted MORE: more pressure, more stimulation, more Nick.

The older man sat up more fully and then slowly pulled his hands off as well. He continued to kneel there, just observing as the curls flew every which way and Charlie ended up curling into a ball, angling his needy cock directly at his waiting boyfriend.

It felt like forever that Charlie made more and more pitiful faces and noises in that direction, tucking his face into the crook of an upturned arm. He heard himself babbling and pleading but nothing moved Nick for several minutes; his mouth pursed, his head tilted and his eyes were fond but he just knelt there… watching. Charlie could see Nick’s own cock, half-rigid and tucked into the bend of his body; he offered to suck it, he demanded, he whined.

He gasped when Nick finally moved, leaning forward to push Charlie flat onto his back again, gentle yet firm. Nick repositioned himself over Charlie’s legs and then bent over towards the water heater; Charlie heard the pump of the lube bottle and glanced over to see Nick had prepared this too. The canister and a stack of towels were there in the corner.

Charlie felt two warm, wet hands cover his groin. His eyes rolled back in his head, his mouth a wide oval which could not even make a sound for a moment. Soon enough, he was back to groaning and panting as Nick now danced his random stimulation dance with hands instead of lips and tongue.

Strokes varied, focus shifted. One thumb rubbing the outer edge of his glans, the other pushing into his perineum. Now just one hand languorously shifting his balls from place to place before pulling, ever so slowly, up the shaft.

Charlie’s legs were trapped, his hips with mere millimetres of leeway to twitch. He opened his eyes to find he had tucked his elbows together over his own face and he clenched his teeth, straining up to smash his forehead into his forearms, air forcing out his nose in the most animalistic groan yet as Nick’s fingers played.

Finally he felt himself engulfed properly by an entire hand and blessedly rubbed consistently, once, twice, three times. His head fell back, his breath hissing as he chased the peak forming deep inside his pelvis. Four, five strokes. He tried to arch into it.

Six, seven… He was almost there…

Nick’s fingers clamped around the base of his cock and squeezed.

“AAAAAAAAAAAAaaaaaaaah! Shit, NICK! Please babe, please…”

Nick lifted off him completely. Charlie’s cock throbbed; everything felt thick, heavy, loaded… He heard the pump bottle again.

Charlie opened his eyes, desperate for relief, only to see Nick shifting his legs again, coming to rest back over the slender torso, Nick’s delicious ass practically in his face. He watched in awe as Nick bent forward; Charlie’s hips came up only to be crashed down again by one of Nick’s forearms. His cock remained untouched, vibrating with need.

And then… Nick’s free hand came into view along one hip, fingers snaking around and… pushing between the cheeks to rub over Nick’s own bud just inches away. Charlie thought his eyes might pop out of his head. His cock continued to strain and pulse as he watched one then two slick, strong fingers push and slide into Nick’s asshole, stretching and thrusting.

Now both men were quietly moaning. Charlie’s brain offered up a single thought: can I come just from this?

Before an answer emerged, Charlie saw the body above him shift again. Nick sat back up and turned around. Getting more lube, he slowly brought his rear end into contact with Charlie’s groin, letting the desperate cock feel the slightest friction sliding between his ass cheeks.

Charlie’s breath was stuttering as he felt that peak, desired and delayed, climb back into view. Nick’s face was still hard lines and dancing eyes. He threw his head back and wrapped a hand around his own angry red cock. Charlie’s eyes flew between watching that and tracing the flush spiraling under the skin of Nick’s chest.

“Nick… please…,” he heard himself whisper. “Please fuck me. Babe… please…”

Nick pulled his hips up and reached down, shifting Charlie’s cock into place with one sticky hand. He locked eyes with his love and began to sink his ass down, taking the length bit by bit. His eyebrows spasmed and his lips roiled but his eyes and his hips were steady. When he reached Charlie’s base, his eyes closed and he breathed out his nose forcefully. Charlie became aware he wasn’t blinking, trying to take in every move.

All the nerves in his body redirected their electricity to the ones sheathed inside Nick. His dick was throbbing in that smooth tightness and Nick… stretched his neck and shoulders… sat up straighter… and began to move…

His eyes flew open and bored back into Charlie’s - watching, waiting. All the anticipation, all the lust pent up and stalled and held back - it condensed inside Charlie’s groin and, within a few strokes, he was fully and freely arching into that peak, vaguely aware of Nick’s hand returning to his own cock to follow him over the long-awaited edge.

It seemed to go on forever, Nick’s hips pistoning erratically as he milked both of them through round after round of cum. One small corner of Charlie’s mind was gratified to hear Nick’s noises were as loud as his own.

Finally Nick slowed and settled and tried to catch his breath. Charlie panted and quivered.

Nick leaned over and grabbed a towel, wiping up his hands and everywhere his spunk had landed. Dropping the towel to one side, he then dropped himself down to drape over the younger man and finally kiss him, their lips open and breathless and satiated. They lingered there until Charlie just about naturally fell out of him, at which point Nick reached up and unbuckled the cuffs and tumbled to one side, grabbing the towel again and handing it over.

They both cleaned up a bit more, snuggled up against each other and giggling softly. Nick then gave a big sigh and laid his head in the curve of Charlie’s neck; the dark-haired young man wrapped his arms around his love and pulled him in tighter.

“Soooo,” he started as he turned his head enough to kiss Nick’s forehead through his fringe, “power bottoming, eh? Is that everything on your list yet?”

Nick hummed sleepily and shrugged. Charlie chuckled softly. “I think we’ve at least tried most, if not all, of your things… When you’re ready, I want you to tell me what you want more of, what’s a Yes for you, ok?” Nick nodded and pressed a simple kiss to Charlie’s collarbone.

“Love… Nick! I am not falling asleep on this floor when we have a nice, soft bed in the next room!”

Nick sighed and pulled back, moving like his blood had been replaced by molasses. They both stood and, as they turned towards the bedroom door, Nick poked Charlie in the side with an elbow. “Crossed the kitchen off,” he teased. “Just the dining room to go.”

Charlie glanced at their tiny table over his shoulder and scowled. “We’re gonna need a stronger surface, I guess.” Nick just laughed and pulled him onto the bed so they could cuddle and doze a while.

——————

Nick and Charlie. Charlie and Nick. They attend their classes. They do their homework. Charlie almost always makes it to Tao’s weekly video call film nights; Nick sometimes does. Nick introduces Charlie to the Gender & Sexuality Alliance group on campus. They visit with their families. They do their chores. They live a life, together.

——————-

A few months later, when Charlie used an extra piece of leather to reach down and cuff Nick to the underside of their very basic bed frame, the cross bar holding up the top of their mattress, Nick’s eyes got wide for more than one reason.

Charlie reared back, saw his face and started smirking. “You never thought of that, did you?” Nick blushed and shook his head. Charlie looked at him fondly as he repositioned himself lower down and took himself in hand.

“Good thing you have me around. Now then, I want you absolutely begging for this next orgasm,” he murmured as his head dropped.

Some timeless time later, Charlie gave Nick exactly what he wanted. His hips crashing up and into Nick’s ass, one hand still curled around Nick’s harness that had lent him the torque he needed earlier and the other hand pressing just enough on Nick’s throat to turn both of his heads purple at the same time.

Charlie boiled up and over, quenching the fire inside him with sweet release inside his beloved. The chill in the air was once again no match for their combined heat.

Chapter Text

Charlie sprawls in his favorite chair in Cliff’s office, legs over one of the padded arms for now. The therapist has come around his desk to sit on one of the swivels across from the sofa. He is watching dust motes drift near one of the windows on a rare sunny day while Charlie picks at the edges of the rips in the knees of his jeans.

Softly these words emerge into the air, “So your birthday weekend home…” Charlie scowls. “Ahhhh.”

Charlie sits up a little straighter and shakes his head. “My parents’ house,” he corrects. “It’s NOT home anymore and… that was obvious…”

Cliff just nods.

Charlie’s eyes remain on his knees but the hands are slowly stilling, now rubbing on top of his thighs. He takes a deep breath.

“It was… fine…,” he begins. “It’s nice they wanted to celebrate with me; I just wish I could have had any extra buffer there besides Tori.” He shrugs. “I know everyone is spread out and busy; it just would have been easier if Nick or somebody could have been there too.”

Cliff hums his question.

“Oh! I didn’t tell you yet! Nick got a job! It’s just part-time right now but the shop owner promised him more shifts once term ends so now I just need to find something too so we can stay in our flat all summer!” Charlie’s face is alight now and the therapist smiles.

“But yeah, he JUST got it so he felt like he couldn’t immediately ask for a weekend off.” Cliff nods.

“Maybe it’s good you practiced spending time with your folks with less buffer anyway…” he offers and Charlie’s head tilts. “You’re 19 now and living full-time elsewhere; you can build a relationship fresh, as an independent adult…”

Charlie snorts loudly.

Cliff nods. “It sounds impossible to you right now…”

“Umm YEAH!” Charlie laughs wryly. Cliff just nods again.

Charlie finally looks over and makes eye contact with the older man for a few moments before his gaze wanders to the window. “They’re never going to see me that way,” he whispers.

Cliff shifts in his seat. “Never is a long time but let’s say you may be right. Does that… their perception… control YOUR experience?” After contemplating that, Charlie shakes his head. “Right. You ARE becoming an independent adult; that’s reality. It’s not all at once; more and more, you are building the skills you need to live well, away from their house.” Charlie nods, eyes still on the sunlight, mouth closed. “What kind of support do you WANT from them going forward?” Charlie shrugs.

Cliff smiles and scratches at his nose. “Okay, we will circle back to that another day. How do you FEEL about becoming the young man you are becoming?”

Charlie’s eyes dart to the therapist’s face, struck by the phrasing. He blinks. His curls shake as his chin jerks sideways. “Becoming…”

Cliff watches bemusedly as Charlie slowly unwinds from his position, pivots and puts his feet on the floor. Hands resuming their rubbing on the narrow thighs, Charlie looks at the rug between them and sighs.

“I don’t know who I’m becoming.” The admission seems to come from somewhere deep inside him, the words sliding out of his throat steady but low. “I feel…” his head tilts, “safe? most of the time now and…” he closes his eyes, “and it’s like… the Shadows are… softer? some days…”

Cliff makes affirming noises.

“The dark voice is still there but… cheekier?” Charlie straightens up and opens his eyes, wrinkling his face at the other man in confusion.

“Friendlier?” Cliff offers.

Charlie blinks.

After a few minutes of silence, Cliff clears his throat and gently says, “You look stuck in your head; shall we try some mirror work again?”

Charlie sighs and nods before standing and walking over so he can see himself reflected in the full-length mirror hanging off the door.

Cliff’s voice is warm and mellow. “Remember all the parts of you can work together. They can be helpers. They’re just you wherever you got traumatized and they froze there but you can thaw them out.”

Charlie swallows and nods before making eye contact with himself. He takes a deep breath.

“Hi, Shadows.” His chin jerks to one side. “No,” he slowly exhales. “That’s not my name.” Charlie blinks. Cliff gradually comes around to one side, murmuring reassurance.

Charlie’s neck slowly bends to one side and then he’s rolling his head in a full circle stretch before facing himself again and he… smirks.

His head goes up in a sharp nod. “Hey. What’s up?” He crosses his arms and pulls his weight over one hip. Charlie laughs, a little surprised, but maintains the pose. He looks over his own face, noting the angle of the eyebrows, the curve of the lip.

After a minute of quiet, Cliff asks, “So is this the twisted protector energy Geoff mentioned?” Charlie slowly nods. “Older than you?” A firmer nod. “Bolder?” A snort.

“Ya think?!” Both men chuckle.

“Good. This is part of who you can grow into, Charlie. He can do his job protecting you finally. What does he want to say today?”

Charlie takes another deep breath.

He settles into the pose a little more, rocking that hip jutting out to one side.

He licks his lips.

As his chin jerks up again in challenge, he hears himself answer with a question of his own.

“You gonna let me have a go at that man of ours?”

Chapter Text

Charlie burst into the flat to find Nick doing homework at the tiny table. Their eyes met and Nick immediately stood up and came towards him as Charlie slammed the door behind him, kicked off his trainers and dropped his bag.

“Honey! What’s wrong? Therapy was bad?” Nick’s arms were already open for a comforting hug but Charlie started fumbling with the other man’s trousers instead. Nick froze, looking down in confusion. Charlie’s forehead snapped up and he stepped back, dropping his hands from Nick’s waist to slap onto his own sides.

“CADET NELSON!” he started and Nick’s mouth fell open. But Charlie choked before any other words could form as their eyes met again, the brown ones clearly at a loss.

Charlie stilled and glared. Nick swallowed and shook his head slightly. “Um, ok.” He began pulling off his clothes and letting them fall wherever, his face turned away as Charlie remained motionless in the middle of the living room. Then he was standing naked, arms behind his back. His eyebrows quirked and he finally looked back at Charlie’s face.

They both took a deep breath, Nick’s slow and steady, Charlie’s shuddering as his eyes nearly vibrated, trying to stay on Nick’s questioning, loving gaze.

Charlie’s head jerked sideways and his hands fumbled now with his own waistband until his trousers and pants were both around his knees. His cock was so hard, it looked painful. His eyes were liquid pools Nick could fall into so the older man just began nodding with the tiniest movement possible.

Charlie’s chin jabbed down. Nick hesitated just a fraction of a second before grabbing a couch cushion and sinking to his knees onto it, in front of the desperate young man. His arms back in Parade Rest, he leaned forward and opened his mouth. Charlie impatiently thrust his hips and moaned as their flesh made contact.

Nick was working hard, trying to build up the saliva necessary, when he felt both of Charlie’s hands lock into his hair and start tugging it. He stretched his neck and noticed his shoulders fall a little; he let out a small moan.

One of Charlie’s hands fell to the side of his neck; soon the fingernails were making small marks there and Nick moaned again. Charlie was gasping and choking with every stroke of the willing mouth. The fingers grew more wild and Nick had to pull away from them; he tried not to let it affect his rhythm but Charlie’s hand dropped again and grabbed at his windpipe, chasing the movement he wanted.

As the drummer’s hand locked on under his jaw, Nick broke off, his arms coming around to make a barrier between them. “Whoa! Honey!”

He looked up and saw Charlie bending over him, eyes glazed; he watched in horror as a shadow seemed to descend across the face of his love and the curly-haired man collapsed into a little ball on the floor, curling around his unsatisfied phallus protectively.

Nick tried to gather Charlie to his chest but found him completely non-cooperative, seemingly locked in his own head. “Charlie! CHARLIE! WHAT IS GOING ON?! Shitshitshit.”

He stood and forcibly picked up the smaller man despite the awkwardness of it all; he rushed him into the next room and laid him down on the bed. He stroked Charlie’s forehead and attempted to keep their faces close together as his beloved shivered and flailed there. He held him close and focused on his own breath, willing it to something resembling regularity, even if serenity seemed out of reach. When his focus returned to the man in his arms, he found him slightly more calm as well but his eyes squeezed shut and his face closed off.

Nick felt or heard something buzzing and fished Charlie’s phone out of his trousers tangled up around his legs. Cliff was calling; Nick answered it without a second thought.

“Charlie! Honey! It’s your therapist! Talk to him please!” Nick tried to angle the camera which had switched on so it pointed at his boyfriend.

“Charlie! You’re home! Good! Uhhhh, hello? Charlie?” Nick watched the darkened face for any sign he would emerge and engage. Nothing. Hesitantly he poked his head into the frame.

“Ummm hi, I’m Nick; we haven’t met yet.”

“Yes of course, hello. It would appear Charlie came straight home then; I’m glad he’s safe. Has he said anything to you?”

“Not really? He uhhhh…,” Nick trailed off as he realized his bare chest was starting to be visible on screen; he jerked the phone back over towards the man on the bed and tried to think of what to say.

Charlie groaned and his eyes opened to slits. “Cliff?” he growled.

“Yes, Charlie. Can you tell me five thing you can see, please?” Charlie just closed his eyes again and shook his head. “Ok how about three things you can touch? Please, Charlie.”

Charlie huffed. “I’m fine.”

“Char!” Nick couldn’t help but exclaim.

Cliff continued as though this was a perfectly reasonable conversation they were all having. “Just three things.” Charlie sighed.

“Ummm, my bed.”

“Great! What else?”

“My trousers.” Charlie scowled, his eyes still screwed shut.

“Mmmm hmmm.”

Charlie breathed for a few moments and then opened his eyes. He looked at Nick who was still hovering quietly. His lips began to wobble and he reached a hand out to touch Nick’s cheek. “My love,” he whispered.

“Thank you, Charlie. Do you want to tell Nick what happened while I’m here? Or do something else?”

Charlie’s hand fell and he closed his eyes again. He took a shaky breath. “Something else,” he said.

“Ok, do you want to talk to me privately right now or something else?” Charlie shook his head. “Words, I need words please.”

“Something else.”

“Ok.” Cliff was silent a few beats. “Do you want to come back to my office tomorrow? Or something else?”

“I guess.”

“Is it all right if I text Nick later with the time? I am worried about you, Charlie; I think we need to finish this part of the conversation soon.”

Charlie’s eyes snapped open and he glared at the face on the phone. “I’m not ready to talk to YOU about this!”

“Is there someone else you’re ready to talk to?” Cliff asked in a neutral voice. Charlie looked at Nick, his beautiful eyes making entreaties Nick did not understand. “You want to tell Nick about it but without me present?”

“Yes,” Charlie croaked out.

“Ok. I would like to talk with Nick a minute first please. I’ll just ask him questions if that’s ok with you. I won’t disclose anything you’ve said or done, of course.” Charlie nodded and Nick swallowed as he turned the screen back towards himself.

“Hello again,” Cliff said with a rueful smile. “You are certainly more experienced with Charlie than I am. Whatever happened when he got home, have you seen it happen before?” Nick shook his head.

“Hmmmm, so we have no strategies to borrow from the past then.” Cliff’s mouth pursed as he thought. “Do you have a guess about the triggering subject which had him leaving our session early today?” Nick blushed and nodded. Cliff waited, pulling in his lips as the moment stretched out.

Nick glanced at Charlie’s face, which had stilled and paled somewhat; his eyes were softer and his breathing more even. Nick cleared his throat and stage-whispered, “Sex?” Charlie closed his eyes for a moment and Cliff nodded.

“I know quite a bit about the relationship you two have, from Charlie and also from Geoff’s notes, and I am confident you have good tools for this conversation. But I do want to be part of some kind of follow up. Would you be willing to come to my office this week if Charlie, one, won’t come himself but, two, is ok with you coming?”

Nick’s answer was immediate, bordering on enthusiastic. “Yes! Of course!” He simultaneously looked and turned the phone towards Charlie, who rolled his lips and then nodded, his eyes never leaving Nick’s face.

Cliff sighed and rubbed the bridge of his nose. “Ok then I’m trusting you two to talk, NOW please, and then one of you to text me by noon tomorrow about the followup visit. How does that sound, Charlie? Can you live with that?” Charlie nodded, his eyes finally skimming over the image on the phone. “All right. Thank you both. Nick, I assume you can get my number from Charlie’s device; you have my permission to contact me directly if you have questions about how to proceed.” Nick nodded and mumbled his gratitude and farewell. They both hung up.

Nick’s chest heaved as he handed the phone to his silent boyfriend; he glanced up shyly and shifted that hand to Charlie’s jaw, tracing its line lightly. The strong brows pulled in and air came whistling out his nose; Charlie’s mouth was a thin, reluctant line.

“Come on, love; it’s just us. What the hell is going on?” Nick’s voice was so soft.

Charlie nodded, pulled back and sat up. He sighed and started to pull his clothes completely off. “Climb in and hold me please; I will try to explain.”

They got themselves sorted into the bed, under the duvet, with Charlie’s curls tucked under Nick’s chin. Charlie stared into space for several minutes before turning and rubbing his face into Nick’s chest. He groaned and settled back down.

“I don’t know how to start… This is going to be messy and I hate it. Shit, it already IS messy; I can’t believe I did that to you!” Charlie’s voice started low but built into a frenzy; Nick rubbed and hushed and soothed. He kissed the top of Charlie’s head.

“Okay… so something came up at therapy today… OBVIOUSLY.” They both chuckled awkwardly. “There’s this… shit,” Charlie paused and huffed, “There’s this… part of me? that I’m getting to know?” Nick hummed his reassurance into Charlie’s forehead.

“Geoff told me it’s the part which normally would protect me and help me feel confident but it… got twisted?” Charlie sank back onto Nick’s arm and looked up at the ceiling. “Somehow… maybe it’s the OCD, maybe it’s my… parents…,” Charlie shook his head, “It doesn’t really matter to me right now. I just want to… learn how to bring him back…,” he rolled over to nuzzle and mumble into Nick’s skin, “back to his real job, helping me. He’s related to the shadow voice or part of it or something; you know how mean the Shadows are but Geoff thought we… I could learn to, eventually, I don’t know, tame him? I guess…”

He sighed. “Am I making any sense?” Nick nodded and squeezed. “So… Cliff has me talk to the mirror sometimes and we see if there’s some part of me needing to speak up, you know? Today… he… he showed up and he’s… apparently…,” he cleared his throat, “he’s apparently very horny for you.”

Nick blinked as Charlie snorted softly. “I mean… not surprising; he’s me, just more mature? and more daring than I am… so far…” He dragged his head so his chin was resting on Nick’s pec and he looked up, smiling wryly. They spent a beat just looking and breathing. “But it scared me,” he then whispered, eyes drifting to the side. “Because he… he’s darker than me too. He wants… he likes to be in charge… and all the games we’ve been playing and all the nights spent safely here and everything getting better in my life! they make it easier for him to show up somehow!” Charlie had hunched up on one elbow through this tumble of words.

Nick’s hand found his back again and resumed rubbing there; he was all silent acceptance and patient love, his heart in his eyes as Charlie paused to catch his breath and check in.

Charlie nodded to himself and made direct eye contact. “I do not say this word lightly… anymore… you know that. So I mean it… I have something I need to make right…” Charlie took a deep breath in the quiet bubble Nick was maintaining. “And I am sorry I violated your boundary on choking. We talked about when you do and do not want it; I knew better and I lost control. I will work on that.”

As Charlie subsided, he very deliberately showed Nick the tip of his tongue before gently placing it between his own teeth and settling his neck, eyes glued to the other’s brown ones. Nick smiled fondly at that, nodded slightly and glanced down for a few beats.

“Mmmmmm,” he breathed out. “I accept your apology; thank you for giving me the space to think about it but, yeah, I am okay, WE are okay. You surprised me, coming home the way you did… obviously…,” he smiled reassuringly as Charlie started to blush. “But I consented to all the rest; you know that, right?”

Charlie nodded slowly. They both shimmied their bodies against the other, finding new ways the skin could fit together.

Nick cleared his throat and Charlie met his eyes again. “So… ummmm… this new guy? does he want to, like, hurt me…,” the older man’s voice halted as Charlie reared up at that.

Both sets of eyes now wide, they froze like that for a few moments. Charlie’s brows furrowed. His head tilted and then shook. “Noooo but he does want to dominate you…,” Charlie began to settle back into the snuggle again. “I suppose that’s why I tried to be the Corporal; that’s the only other role play we really have for that scene…”

Nick nodded and then smirked as something occurred to him. “I mean… you’ve been in charge other times though…”

Charlie rolled his eyes but then nodded. “I know. I guess… I think that’s one of the reasons New Guy is ready to… come out and play?” his head tilting on the last phrase, testing out its veracity, its accuracy as the thoughts emerged.

Nick’s chin was bobbing now. “Okay, tell me if this is the wrong time to get into it but I just want to remind you… I like a LITTLE bit of pain and FAKE danger, that’s it.”

Charlie’s nods were firmly in agreement. “Yes, absolutely. Of course.” He planted a loud kiss on Nick’s chest and they both dared a real smile aimed at the other. Then Charlie returned his cheek to the curve of Nick’s neck and gave a contented sigh.

“Okay…,” he breathed out. “Dear New Guy, you and me are gonna have to talk… with CLIFF… before you get to have a go at this man! Got it?!” Nick chuckled softly, rumbling under Charlie’s curls. They both relaxed muscles which had been bunched the last hour or so. As weariness overtook them, they heard Charlie’s mouth say, “That’s not my name…”

Chapter Text

Charlie was wired and buzzing when he slipped in the front door. It had been a busy morning at the coffee shop and he had probably used his employee access to free caffeine a bit too much in order to get through it.

As he dropped off his various belongings in the foyer, Nick poked his head around the corner, a tea towel over his shoulder. “Welcome home! How was it?”

Charlie looked up and grinned at him. “Fine, fine! Look at your cute face!” He closed the distance between them and grabbed Nick by the cheeks. They giggled at each other. “Are you…,” Charlie’s neck craned to see into the kitchen, “at a good stopping point in your Day Off Chore Fest, I think you called it?”

Raising one eyebrow, Nick smirked and threw the towel onto the nearest counter. “Um, yeah! What did you have in mind?”

Charlie’s grin widened as he brought it into Nick’s; he immediately deepened the kiss and rocked his pelvis into Nick’s hands. They lingered there several minutes, twisting heads one way and then the other, grazing noses on the pass.

A trifle breathless, Charlie pulled back and pointed at the couch. “Sit?” Nick jumped in that direction without hesitation and Charlie clambered onto his lap, dropping his knees on either side of Nick’s thighs. As he brought their lips back together, Charlie sighed, “I’ve missed this.”

Long slow kisses, Nick’s face pressed into Charlie’s collar, teeth on skin, hands gripping here and then there. The minutes stretched; they took their time.

Eventually both were shirtless. Nick was latched onto Charlie’s chest, the dark head thrown back and gasping. The strong drummer hands were raking back and forth across Nick’s back, leaving faintly reddened lines.

When Nick’s teeth finally released his left nipple, Charlie whined again and wiggled his hips. “Need you, babe.” Nick nodded and Charlie climbed off, bending to strip off his bottoms as Nick stood up. The taller man grinned and grabbed Charlie’s naked thighs, hoisting him into his arms, the lean legs wrapping around the wide waist instinctively.

Charlie had yelped during the lift but was all smiles and dancing eyes as he circled the other man’s neck with his arms. Nick kissed up into him again and started shuffling towards the bedroom.

Taking a moment to make sure the lid to the tallest canister was off, Nick sat on the edge of the bed and settled Charlie into position, his rear end hanging off of Nick’s knees. He asked the younger man a question with his eyebrows and got an eager nod in answer. Nick leaned over and got some lube, bringing his fingers straight into the crease of Charlie’s ass.

The moans in his ear were certainly distracting but Nick was well-practiced at prepping his boyfriend by now, nearly a year into living together full-time. He also knew how to factor in their different arousal patterns. “How keyed up are you, love? Do you want me to go down on you next?” Charlie shook his head and gnawed again at his earlobe.

Nick groaned and nodded. “Can I… shit Char… can I try something new?” Charlie paused and pulled back enough to make eye contact. “I want to fuck you into the wall by the table, break in the dining room, the last space finally.” They both chuckled. Charlie nodded excitedly.

Nick stood up and baby-stepped them back into the common area. He deliberately let Charlie slam into the wall a little hard and immediately crashed his groin into place; the noise ripped out of his lover’s throat was intoxicating.

“Hang on,” he murmured. Charlie got a firmer grip on his shoulders and Nick wedged his fingers in between them to undo the drawstring knot on his joggers. His hands shifted to his hips just long enough to push the two waistbands down at the same time and he reached under Charlie’s quivering ass to line up with his stretched-out entrance.

“Ready?” he asked and Charlie’s entire face was writ large with his consent. As… he… sank… onto… Nick’s… cock and cried out in ecstasy.

Nick gasped and bent and strained into Charlie’s neck. His hands locked onto the narrow thighs and he waited for Charlie’s nod, which didn’t take long. He experimented - hips flexing, knees bending, pelvis tilting - until he found the angles which worked for both of them, going by the grunts he was driving out of Charlie’s body.

Soon he was lost in the chase, focused only on the lightning arcing into his dick, every clench of Charlie’s passage shooting sparks into his brain. He was babbling like a fool as he filled his love and stuttered into a stop. Then he looked up and saw Charlie’s panting face still twitching with need.

He gulped and nodded and carefully lowered the wiry legs to the floor before bending further and engulfing a very dark cock with his greedy mouth. Charlie’s hands fell into his hair and just rubbed there as they rocked together, a familiar beat of desire building into the arch of Charlie’s back, a litany of muttered curse words and the always-surprising sensation and taste of his beloved’s fulfillment.

Nick straightened up with a ginormous grin and leaned his torso back into the other, rubbing circles with his forehead into the side of Charlie’s head and neck. He felt the younger man’s relief, a distinct unwinding of muscles and bones. They sagged together a few moments and caught their breath.

Pulling apart only to offer a hand and lead the younger man back to the bed for afterglow cuddles, Nick noticed his biceps shaking and diverted to the fridge to grab one of his post-workout electrolyte drinks. He would have to increase his stamina before they tried that again!

Chapter Text

The music was loud; the air was thick with desire. Nick stood at the bar, waiting for their drinks and watching his boyfriend laughing and wiggling on the dance floor with their friends from the Gender & Sexuality Alliance. They formed a little bubble of pure fun but Nick’s shoulders were up around his ears every time he got jostled by the rest of the crowd, who did not seem to share their group’s agenda.

Nick felt out of place in his joggers and t-shirt; none of them had planned for a night out on the town. Max suggested they celebrate the end of first term when their logistics meeting finally ended. Charlie had turned to him with such excitement that he could not say no.

It WAS a delight to see his pretty man having a blast; he fit in better with the other dancers, his regular skinny jeans and dark plaid blending into the dim in between strobe flashes.

The bartender finally returned with the two drinks; Nick settled up and took a swig of his mudslide before turning to check if Charlie was ready for a break. Instead he saw a beefy tan guy in a bright green button down had stepped in behind his boyfriend and was trying to line up their hip movements. Nick frowned when he saw Charlie hadn’t noticed yet, lost in the song.

He slowly, politely cut through the press of bodies and found himself finally on the edge of the GSA knot just as the curly head whipped around in shock, his body jerking forward away from the other man. Green Shirt leered at him, raising his hands to look innocent. He leaned in and murmured something into Charlie’s face that Nick could not hear.

He quickly stepped into their space and got the vodka cran in his right hand up in between their torsos. Charlie’s face sagged with relief as he turned and grasped Nick’s entire hand with both of his own. He was a little shaky as he took the glass, still using both hands, and brought it up to his mouth, his eyebrows rising dramatically at his love over the rim. Nick smiled warmly at him and then let the affection drain out of his expression as he flicked his head to make eye contact with Green Shirt.

“Ugh, who is this, your bodyguard?” the stranger groaned. He turned back to Charlie with a sly smile. “Are you like a royal or something?” His hand came up to grab a narrow arm.

Charlie shook him off immediately and stepped closer to Nick, one hand dropping from the glass to reach around the rugby lad’s neck. He socketed their hips together and began to sway, leading the older man into a rhythm. Nick’s face lit up as he realized Charlie’s strategy was pure ice. He took another swig of his drink, grinned and possessively gripped the slender waist with his free hand.

Green Shirt rolled his eyes and slipped back into the masses. Nick and Charlie lost themselves in the beat, foreheads close, making every dance something intimate, something just theirs.

When Nick finally looked up again, their glasses were empty and their friend group was thinner. He smiled down into Charlie’s dazzling eyes. “Ready to go home, darling?” The younger man nodded and they waved their goodbyes before slipping out to find a ride for hire.

When they got home, they left all the lights off, moving directly into wordlessly disrobing each other, heads buzzing slightly, lips crashing together. When they fell into bed, Nick found himself rolled under the smaller man straddling his pelvis and masterfully stroked through two orgasms, Charlie covering him in his own release the second time. Utterly besotted, Nick brought his beloved down into his arms for more kisses and the darkness of sleep.

———————-

A few months later, Nick found himself on the edge of another crowd. He unloaded the bag of water bottles onto the table behind the cluster of sign language interpreters at the side of the stage as they worked out the final schedule details amongst themselves. Stretching his back and resettling the shoulder seams of his rainbow tye die t-shirt, he looked around for Charlie or Janet, wondering what his next assignment would be. Not seeing them, he decided to settle here and just watch the event take shape for a minute.

A large white man with a full beard covering his handsome face emerged from the middle aisle and sidled up to him, stopping just short of hip checking him. He smiled sideways at Nick and crossed his arms so their postures matched. “Hi! I’m Brand,” he offered.

“Nick,” he nodded and smiled, friendly as ever. Just then, he heard Charlie’s voice over the loudspeakers asking everyone to start quieting down as they would be starting in one minute. He glanced over and admired his boyfriend’s poise at the microphone before the dark head turned away to confer with the gorgeous Asian woman at his side.

“What the fuck?” Nick whipped around to see what the other guy was on about. “Why is the twink in charge? Doesn’t he know the one thing he’s good for?” Brand’s leer tried to include Nick who blinked in shock.

“Wha… the one thing?” Nick could not even fathom what was happening.

“Yeah,” Brand winked. “Taking our dicks while we make out, am I right?” His elbow came up to poke at Nick’s ribs.

Nick’s arms fell to his sides and his hands clenched into fists. “Are you seriously here, at a protest against electro shock therapy for queer and autistic people, OBJECTIFYING an entire group of gay men?!” Nick had tried to keep his voice down but people near them were turning in their direction anyway.

Brand’s mouth fell open then he mumbled something defensive and hollow before scurrying off. Nick shook his whole body slightly and returned his attention to the organizers gathered at the center of the stage.

Somewhere during the speeches he had heard during preparation meetings, Nick found himself pondering the meaning of pride. His chest burst with it for Charlie’s burgeoning leadership, for the way the committee had put this whole thing together and the money they were raising for self-advocacy groups. Where did righteous anger fit in, he wondered. British society had not always made room for angry voices. Were those feelings of pride and anger really that incompatible?

Later as he folded and stacked chairs, he was assisted by Matty who he suspected had a crush on him. If he’d never met Charlie, it probably would have been requited; the two young men had a lot in common and Nick admitted to himself that he had a type. Feeling protective of the slender fellow in the wake of Brand’s toxic take, Nick was warmer with Matty than usual.

Charlie caught his eyes from across the room at one point, his focus on the committee debrief lost due to the play of Nick’s muscles as he cleaned up. He had seen the interaction with their friend and he smirked flirtatiously, pointing two fingers at his own eyes and then over at Nick’s face which was reddening rapidly and not from the exertion.

Nick shrugged and shook his head, waving his arms in front of himself in the universal gesture of negation. Charlie’s chin jutted up in challenge and he mouthed, “I know. You’re mine.” Nick felt a shiver go down his spine at the fierce look in his lover’s eyes. He bounced on his heels a little, inexplicably aroused by what was really just a set of glances between them. Charlie smirked again and turned back to the person speaking earnestly near him. The older man wondered how soon they could go home.

—————-

Nick paced in the bedroom, impatient to have his turn in the loo and avoiding Bee’s vague disdain for most human contact in the living room. He could hear Scarlet and Charlie chortling like kids in there; finally he knocked. “Almost done?”

He heard them gasp and some clatter. “Yeah, yeah,” came the voice of his love before the door was suddenly yanked inward. Now it was Nick’s turn to gasp. Charlie stood there, tilting his head, one hand falling from the door knob and the other still braced against the door frame. He looked like a model, Nick thought, outlined like that.

His skinny black jeans might be familiar but surely that dark blue jumper was new. Charlie sleeveless, god… Nick drew in a shaky breath and blinked. The blue fingernails, the eyeliner, FUCK - THE BLACK LIPSTICK. Nick’s eyes darted from detail to detail again and again.

Charlie giggled and scooted past him to dig his blue Converse out of his closet. Scarlet lingered a moment by the sink, golden eyes stuck on Nick’s wide open face; the brown eyes followed Charlie as though they were magnetized and he was the Earth’s molten core of iron and nickel.

Her messy hot pink hair buns vibrated as she chuckled and grabbed a tin from her case on the counter; she stepped up to Nick and quickly wiped her fingers around his temples on the outside of each eye. He pulled back as she finished up and frowned at her. She just shrugged and stepped out of his way, saying only, “Just making it tangible.”

He entered and closed the door, moving to the mirror to see she had smeared star-shaped glitter on his skin there. It kinda just looked like more freckles, to be honest, but sparkly? He shrugged; she was weird but kind and he guessed it was all right.

He emptied his bladder, washed his hands and applied some cologne. He took a moment with the mirror to appreciate the necklace Charlie had gotten him for Christmas again; the small metal rings in pink, purple and blue were subtle but nice above the white of his tank top. The button down was a subdued print but the sleeves were short AND cuffed just the way he liked. He felt ready for the dance club this time.

Nick exited to find Charlie eager to take his hand and they both widened their eyes when they caught Scarlet and Bee wrapped around each other on the couch. She stood up easily, straightening her black leather skirt; Bee’s long limbs moved more awkwardly, tangling in their long grey trench coat. Everyone smiled sheepishly and made their way out the front door.

Nick was at the bar waiting for drinks, watching Charlie on the dance floor again. Tonight was end of term; summer vacation and work waited for them but Nick was determined to enjoy this evening. They weren’t regulars here by any stretch but it was always a bit of a challenge for him, the way these clubs seemed to operate. The noise, the expense, the density, the way many here were on the prowl - they all grated on him more than he wanted to admit.

The one thing he definitely appreciated about these rare occasions was watching Charlie. He was getting used to dancing with Charlie too, as long as he could be close and let the younger man lead him. He got their drinks and wound his way over to his favorite person.

Some time later, he noticed he’d lost his button down somewhere. He and Charlie were in a sweaty little bubble, riding the high of alcohol and lust. One of Charlie’s thighs was between his own and there was a lot of… friction the way they were moving.

Suddenly another person was grinding on Charlie from behind but the curly-haired man didn’t miss a step; he pushed back, spun around and rubbed his ass against Nick’s groin instead. Nick dropped his arms from where they’d been above his head, onto Charlie’s chest, and tucked them fully together, still following the smaller hips from side to side.

Nick thought he might explode there on the dance floor but he managed to last until the end of the song. Leaning down in the one second of relative quiet, he shouted “I’mma loo” in Charlie’s ear and started to untangle them so he could walk in that direction.

Stumbling along, he was all the way in the toilets at the sinks, washing his face, when he noticed his boyfriend had followed him in here. Looking more clearly at him, Nick realized why he had just had to do that first; Charlie’s face was still smeared with black lipstick. His eyeliner was also feathered out by heat and movement. Nick gulped; he looked… so fucking… hot like that.

Charlie’s eyes were dark orbs and locked onto his own face in the glass. Nick stepped around behind him and resumed the position they’d just had on the dance floor, curled around him, touching everywhere he could. Charlie melted into the embrace but his attention remained fixed on his reflection.

Nick nuzzled and nibbled his way down the other man’s neck. Other patrons were coming and going all around them but they weren’t the only people getting frisky in the restroom and Nick, for one, was too far gone to care.

As his lips started trailing down one of Charlie’s arms, teeth dragging on the bare piece of shoulder… Nick noted when Charlie closed his eyes, his neck slowly bending to one side; then he was rolling his head in a full circle stretch before looking down at Nick’s face where he had bent to kiss into the wiry biceps. Charlie smirked.

He stepped back, grabbed Nick’s hands and dragged him into one of the stalls. “Nelson,” he hissed. Nick blinked and shivered. “I need your mouth on my cock.” Nick nodded, half dazed. Charlie glanced down at his lips and then back up at his eyes; his grin roiled. “NOW.”

Nick automatically snapped his heels together and then swiftly bent to undo the other man’s jeans, pull out his dick and get to work. After a few minutes, he felt Charlie remove his jumper, ball it up and shove it into his arms. “Drop.” It was a bark in the night; it brooked no hesitation.

He bent to his knees without losing contact with that delicious cock, tucked the jumper under himself and latched his hands onto Charlie’s ass. The knobby fingers were in his hair. He looked up. The beautiful face was only enhanced, not marred, by the disaster of black across it. Charlie’s mouth was open, panting, but his eyes remained focused and intense; he watched as Nick licked and sucked at the sensitive underside.

Even in here, the music was loud; the air was thick with desire. Nick lost himself in the taste and feel of the man above him. He could stay here forever, worshipping this one.

Chapter Text

Nick thinks his boyfriend is the coolest person on the planet. Charlie behind a drum kit has always given him a thrill and enjoying him play live music in front of a crowd, even the small one inside this pub, was making him feel buzzed before he was even a quarter of the way through his pint of stout.

Looking around as the Clectics jammed through their cover of Depeche Mode’s Just Can’t Get Enough, Nick noticed how into it people were, heads bopping even in the back where they clearly had not come FOR the show. He grinned at their friends shimmying at the front and Charlie’s curls bouncing over his face tight with concentration.

This was definitely a good vibe and Nick resolved to talk to Charlie about coming back to this pub for a date on another night; maybe it was just a welcoming place all the time, a place where the quiet gays could go when they weren’t in the mood for dancing or parades. The beer selection was good anyway.

Later Nick got to crush Charlie into a huge hug as the whole group converged on the dark-haired young man with congratulations on his first gig. People bought them both beers but Nick gratefully waved off his share of the subsequent rounds, saying he wanted to make sure they got home okay. Charlie didn’t end up drinking TOO much either, in the end; most beers just do not taste good to him. But he laughed and soaked up the praise and made sure his new band mates and their friends were included in the celebrations. Nick watched him, thinking his heart might burst right out of his chest.

When they got home, Nick assessed their energy level; Charlie seemed like he was flying high with the electricity of performing. So when he mentioned he might go take a shower, Nick grabbed his hands and asked him to wait. Charlie’s body fell into place, leaning towards him and tipping his face up.

Nick lost himself in those gorgeous eyes for a moment and Charlie’s reaction was all soft curiosity. Bringing his knuckles up for a kiss, Nick then transferred both of Charlie’s hands to his left and used his right to cup Charlie’s cheek. He thumbed the edges of eyeliner smudges and smiled with delight.

“You are so fucking cool, do you know that, Charlie Spring?” The younger man’s face was shining by now, his eyebrows going up with an invitation to say more. “I love seeing you play.” Nick felt his face might crack if his grin got any bigger. He leaned in and kissed him, their lips softening into it gradually.

When he pulled back, he dropped both hands to the slender waist and rocked their hips together. “Can we… can I make you need that shower even more first?” Charlie blinked as his hands wound around Nick’s neck.

“But I’m all sweaty and gross…,” his lower lip pouting out in confusion as he finished. Nick shook his head.

“More like hot and steamy and messy and fuckable,” Nick murmured into his curls, pulling him closer. Charlie giggled and sighed as Nick’s mouth found his neck. “You still don’t know what you do to me, Char; watching you drum is such a rush.” Nick nibbled along his jawbone. “And I love that you’re a makeup guy now; you look so sexy like this.”

Charlie pulled back in shock. “Do you?! I mean…,” he blinked, “I know you liked the club look last year but we didn’t really talk about it when I made this more of my every day…” He sank his top teeth into his bottom lip, his brows furrowed.

“Charlie! I’m glad you’re playing with styles and you don’t owe me any explanations; it’s YOUR face!” Nick scoffed at him while squeezing him tighter in reassurance. “But for the record, it’s fucking HOT! Here, come look at yourself!”

With that, Nick stepped back and dragged the smaller man into the bedroom and in front of the mirror on the far closet door. He positioned himself behind Charlie and pressed their cheeks together. “Look, you’re a god damn rock star,” he whispered.

Charlie inhaled sharply as he made eye contact with himself and his torso tightened within Nick’s arms. Nick smiled lustfully as Charlie’s head tilted, first one way and then the other and lengthened into a circular neck stretch. The kohl-rimmed eyes found the brown ones in the glass and Nick nodded at him.

“Hi.”

His mouth widened, the corner twitching. He turned inside Nick’s embrace and grabbed his cheeks. His gaze was on fire. “Yes. Hot dirty sex. Now.”

Nick pulled in his lips, his eyebrows high, and bobbled his head in the affirmative. “How do you want me, boss?” he said with a smirk.

The younger man glared at him and pushed off on his shoulders but Nick’s cheeky expression did not change. “Naked for a start,” came the snarl and Nick cheerfully obliged.

Next came a single finger pointing at the bed and Nick pursed his lips and squinted at that. Then his smirk returned and he crossed his arms. “You don’t talk much, do you?”

The light eyes narrowed and the lean hands fell to his sides. They contemplated each other for a long beat; just as Nick started getting antsy, the smaller man stepped forward and Nick froze as his lover stalked around him. Something about Nick being naked and the other man being clothed was making the freckled skin goose pimple.

He made a full pass around Nick’s body; the eye contact as he went around the front was intense and Nick licked his lips. But he didn’t move as the slender frame bent and kept going, coming to rest once he was out of view behind Nick.

A strong hand was suddenly on the center of his back and the rugby lad felt himself responding and bending before he could really think about it. He was pushed until his head was as close to his ankles as he’d ever managed; he put his hands on his knees to stabilize.

Nick felt a foot kick against the inside of one leg; he widened his stance. One hand reached under him and stroked at his member which twitched and bloomed a little. The hand kept going until Nick was more rigid, then withdrew. He wiggled back at the loss when suddenly there was a small jolt of pain where he’d been flicked in the testicles. Nick groaned and wiggled again.

The other man walked around and planted a single finger under his chin, pulling it up. As Nick felt the blood rushing around his body, he saw the other hand come up to point at the bed again. He chuckled softly but complied, lying on his back with his head on a pillow. He raised his eyebrows at his boyfriend who gave a curt nod and start pulling off his own clothes.

Nick saw him hesitate by the canisters and then shake his head. Instead he came to stand at the foot of the bed, just staring at Nick’s cock until it twitched under his gaze. Then he smirked and climbed onto Nick’s legs, knees on either side. He leaned down and nosed all around Nick’s hips and groin, delicately making contact with every area and drawing the most delicious gasps out of the prone man.

He sat back up and they made eye contact again; Nick saw a fierceness and humor and affection boiling together behind the frayed black of eyeliner applied hours earlier. He swallowed and squared up his shoulders, waiting to see what came next.

The dark head bent once more and Nick’s breath caught when he saw the plump lips just centimeters from the tip of his aching cock. He heard himself start to chant. “Please, babe. I need you.” His fingers fluttered at his side yet he intuited they would not be welcome in those beloved curls tonight so he kept his arms locked down.

A single swipe of the tongue across his most sensitive skin had Nick arching but it was gone almost instantly. The slender torso straightened and then inched forward and Nick’s head fell back as he felt all the most tender bits of his lover sliding up his lower half.

Pelvis met pelvis; there was grinding and groaning. Nick’s litany resumed. “PLEASE, please, I need you.” Nothing changed. His eyes flew open and found that trademark smirk. He groaned again. “Why are you torturing me?!”

For that, his nipples were twisted, a split second each, firing back and forth, the lightning rocketing across his chest and drawing his shoulders and head off the mattress. “FUUUUUUCK! Ok ok, I won’t say that again!” The hands withdrew and Nick fell back, breathing heavily.

The journey upward continued until knees were on either side of Nick’s ears, long hands were elegantly spidered against the wall and the beautifully olive-toned cock was just out of reach now that Nick could barely move his neck. He looked up and saw the other man settle in to wait him out.

His hips rocked from side to side. The muscles of his face writhed. His cock throbbed. He admitted defeat and returned to begging. “Honey? Please.” That got him a head tilt and nothing more. “Charlie?” A head shake. “Babe! Touch me! Something! Anything!” The jaw arched from one side to the other, eyes blazing. “Please… sir?” Eyes narrowed, mouth smirking, a tiny shrug. A shift, tension, a spark catching…

“Stop talking.” The narrow hips thrust forward and Nick obeyed.

When Charlie finally fell to one side, giggling breathlessly and sounding more like himself, Nick rolled towards him and propped himself up on one elbow. He panted a minute and wiped his chin. “New Guy really likes blowjobs, eh?” His eyes were twinkling and Charlie laughed incredulously, rolling onto his stomach so their legs tangled together. They glowed at each other a moment.

Then Charlie pushed up and crawled into Nick’s space, making him lie back again; as he wound his way down the muscled torso, he murmured, “I mean… who doesn’t?” Nick closed his eyes and smiled wide.

—————

Nick and Charlie. Charlie and Nick. They join the Brainy & Bent Bunch for trivia night every week at their local pub. Charlie chooses structural engineering as his specialty. Nick buckles down to finish his English degree. They find a new favorite restaurant. Nick switches from the school rugby team to a regional amateur one so he can just have fun. Charlie goes to therapy. They have lots of great sex.

—————

Charlie ran his hands down his sides one more time, eyes caught on their match in the mirror. If his grandparents only knew what he’d spent the birthday money on… He pulled in his lips; welp, he’d just have to add it to the list of things he didn’t tell them, like how their graduation gift funded a whole bunch of stuff for Nick’s first time bottoming! Yeah, that was definitely not a Christmas dinner topic!

He smiled, shook his head, took a deep breath and nodded at himself in the glass. They were ready.

Nick was pacing in the bedroom. Yeah, this whole “tell each other about impending Sexy Times” idea was maybe not good. He was not ready.

But the bathroom door was opening and it didn’t matter because this was happening. He blinked…

His feet stumbled to a halt…

His legs slowly buckled and he sank to his knees…

Eyes wide, mouth open… Awestruck.

Ready to worship.

Framed in the doorway, already smirking, jaw tilting, ready to accept all manner of sacrifice.

Greasepaint from temple to temple. Otherworldly, it made the eyes.

A corset?!?! Black, leather and silk and cord. Nick could barely breathe.

No pants. God! His mouth began to water.

Left hand tucked behind his back, chest out, right hand falling from the door knob, one foot stepping forward…

Was this really happening?! This was really happening…

The right hand reached out and cupped Nick’s face. His eyes closed for a brief moment before fluttering open again, eager to take this all in. The smile… Nick’s glance darted between the eyes and the smile. He was pleased, right? RIGHT?!

The smile pinched into the nose and kept him guessing. The hand turned as his body began to glide around the kneeling man; it crossed Nick’s mouth and then the wrist was bent over his forehead, palm covering his eyes, fingertips drumming on Nick’s lips. The strawberry blonde head rolled back but met no resistance; the other body ended at the wrist as far as he could tell.

On the edges of his partially blocked field of vision, Nick caught a glimpse of the other hand descending towards his pecs over his left shoulder; wait, what was that? Before he could process, a lick of fire seared across his chest. He lurched forward; the hand on his head disappeared behind him.

Looking down, he saw a curling bright pink line on the broad muscle there; startled and even more aroused, he looked up and saw the left hand hovering there, fingers bent into a fierce claw, each tipped with what looked like steel? nails?

Nick gasped and leaned back, rocking slightly, his cock fully engorged by now and jutting towards his belly. He watched as the claw descended and all five nails spread out and… nipped just below his sternum. It was deliciously brief surface pain; every nerve-ending across his entire torso lit up. His chin dropped; no new pink lines…

The right hand returned and gripped the top of his head firmly, bending it to the right. The left index finger danced a pattern from his collarbone up behind his left ear. It was sharp but delicate. Nick pulled at the hand tugging into his hair and felt more than heard a low rumble well up from deep inside himself.

“Mark me god dammit,” he growled and the hand pushed him forward as flames erupted across his back. “HNNNNNNGH!” His hands found the floor, his ass shook, his mouth was wide and loose. “Yesssss,” he hissed as he arched into the pain.

He heard the pump of the lube bottle. The air was all fire and anticipation.

The right hand materialized first, short nails and slick digits grazing his entrance on its first pass through. He pushed back, desperate for more. It dissolved away from him.

Another lance of heat, lower down on his back. He moaned and writhed. Another swipe of the right. A dancing fingernail on his left flank. He was wild for it now, not a single muscle working in tandem with any of his other muscles.

When the right hand breached him, the left hand was already in place to stab his left shoulder as he spasmed forward. He jumped back from it and impaled himself further, faster. He choked and repeated the motion. Forward, sting; back, pressure.

He’s not sure how long he rocked there, fucking himself against his lover’s hands. But the one in his ass was pushing down now and he had to still; as the left hand did a skittering dance across the back of his neck and down the broad back, he felt another finger stretch him out. He moaned.

The two hands created a syncopated rhythm and he became the choir. “Fuck! Yes! Like that! God! Yes!” He felt a crest of heat rising in his balls. “Oh! My! God! I’m cum… cumming!” He trembled and convulsed, the two points of contact working him throughout the entire wave.

“Jesus! You didn’t even touch my cock, babe.” He panted and babbled. “You like that, don’t you? You like my hair trigger, babe? You make me come so easy, so good…”

The hands disappeared. He whined.

Nothing but the sound of his own labored breathing.

He raised his head and glanced around but he couldn’t see the whole figure still behind him so he pushed off and lifted his torso so he was back in the kneeling position. He swayed there and tried to make eye contact with the other man.

Who swaggered into view, cock in hand, no metal fingertips visible anywhere. He hooked the thumb from his free hand into Nick’s open mouth and pulled them close together. “You talk too much, Nelson,” came a dark throaty voice and then the cock was pushing past his rapacious lips.

Far too soon, Nick was shoved off the still resplendent shaft. His eyes whipped up to catch the look on the other man’s face: nostrils were flaring, the contrast of pale and void still startling, the sea-tossed orbs full of banked lust.

Nick’s chest heaved and his arms flailed to keep himself upright as the other stepped away fully. One arm rose, steadily pointing at the bed. Nick blinked and nodded. He stood up, feeling shaky, and collapsed onto the bed, rolling onto his back and hoping he’d guessed the position correctly.

He got no feedback, just a view of the man’s back as he returned to the side table and pulled out the cuffs. To Nick’s surprise, his wrists were bound and then dragged down in front instead of above his head. If he bent and stretched just so, he might be able to touch himself; this was unprecedented!

He chanced it and the bright eyes just watched him from their mask, the mouth a thin line offering no clues of approval or disfavor. Yes, he was able to stroke himself almost all the way down; he was, of course, hard again by now. He smiled bashfully up at the other man.

The black curls bent and the generous mouth swallowed his length, his own hands pulling uselessly up his stomach. The lithe fingers were added later. They swirled around hips and abs a long time as the lips teased and pebbled nearby.

Finally hands and throat worked together to pull another release from his willing body. Recovery involved an unclenching of eyes and glutes and calves, his mind producing the path until he could look down and find the dark figure again, now standing at the foot of the bed, once more stroking his own cock.

Enraptured, Nick could only blink and wheeze and stretch in his direction, still yearning for more. Yearning to see his beloved fulfilled in all possible ways.

The wiry legs stepped up onto the bed. The torso swayed there, its wrapping utterly captivating the older man. The brown eyes traced each seam, each wrinkle, each lacing. Then they returned to the sight of that glorious cock as it slowly appeared and retreated inside one hand, then the other.

Nick whined when the weight shifted on the bed but the standing man just leaned far enough to cover three fingers with lube and then straightened. Nick’s pupils were completely blown as he watched that hand sweep out of view.

The dark head fell back for a moment but quickly circled back where their eyes could lock together, electricity still vibrant between them. Eyelids twitching, lips quivering - Nick couldn’t tell anymore who was experiencing what. His own ass was still slick from the earlier encounter and he felt it pulsing in sympathy as he watched a pelvis gyrating, one hand in front and one in back drawing small grunts from the night.

His nerves straining as though he hadn’t already been satiated (twice!) by this lovely man, he watched the dazzling eyes fall to his own groin on the bed. Following their glance, he saw his cock was turgid yet again. His lips parted.

His eyes wide in disbelief, he saw that pelvis begin a descent. He whimpered, wondering if he would survive this scene. The strong hands had reached his chest and reclaimed the cuffs, drawing strength from an interlocking of fingers.

The tip of his dick slid up and back and into place. He fought to keep his eyes open, not wanting to miss a single second of his lover’s masterpiece. He was making noises he could only describe as feral. The pelvis shivered… and sank… and shimmied… and sank…

Once they were totally socketed together, there was a pause where every molecule of oxygen in the room transported three millimeters to one side.

The face above him was a black hole, heavy and turned inward. The universe waited…

The eyes blinked back into existence and the striking brows bent; the hands found the buckles and freed Nick’s wrists. Then he began to move…

The galaxies spun stars out of the void. Iron and nickel were forged in the heart of suns. Lava boiled deep inside new planets. Everything was everywhere, inside and out.

Nick ran his hands back and forth on the narrow thighs, head back, hips lifting. “Ohmygodohmygod. Jesus you feel so good.” He grunted and panted. “You’re the one, ohmygod, you’re the one. You’re so hot; you’re the one I want.”

The smaller man grabbed his wrists and brought Nick’s hands to his chest, where they slid down and found a new home along the sides of the supple leather. The dark head began to nod in time with the beat of his hips bringing them both to the inexorable peak. “That’s right. I am the one. I am…,” his movements lost their rhythm a bit as one lean hand curled into place. “the One,” he shuddered and gasped, “in Black.”

Both sets of eyes closed as they went over the edge together, plunging them into darkness.

—————

Some timeless time later:

“He’s the one you want?”

“Mmm?! Oh. Well, yeah. He’s confident. … He knows he’s hot shit. Hell yes I want that to be how you act more often, Char!”

“Hmmmm.”

“Charlie… he’s you, remember? He’s always been there. Every time you sassed me or someone else. It’s that part of you… and I love you, all of you.”

“He came out of the Shadows… That doesn’t scare you?”

“Hmmmmm. Maybe he didn’t know how to live anywhere else… He’s not the mean part, Charlie. I don’t think he’s the mean part.”

“He’s a fighter…”

“That’s a good thing; world needs more fighters fighting the good fight.”

“Hmmmmm.”

“Now who’s talking too much; come here and let me sleep, ya goof.”

Chapter Text

Today in Cliff’s office, Charlie is folded up, socks on the edge of the comfy chair, knees in front of his face, hands on ankles, eyes tracing the lines between ceiling tiles. The therapist is at his desk, watching the raindrops race down the windows.

He sneaks a glance at his watch and clears his throat. Charlie nods and licks his lips. “Ummm, it went… well.” He smiles to himself. “The… uhhhh… the physical part was amazing actually.” He closes his eyes. Two long slow breaths later, he opens them again and sits up straighter.

“I just… I’m wondering why Nick likes it so much! Him… Me like that!” His brows beetle together. “That part of me seems so selfish, greedy even, but Nick… he uhhhh… really liked it, all of it.” He smiles again and drops his feet to the floor.

Cliff’s head tilts. “What do selfish and greedy mean when you say them, exactly?”

Charlie blushes and fiddles with the threads in the knees of his jeans. After a beat, he swallows and nods to himself. Then his chin juts up and he makes eye contact for the first time today. “I like getting head and mostly I cum first.” He shrugs and then smirks. “This weekend was a present for my man though.” His nose wrinkles and then he looks away.

Cliff smiles. “Well hi. Yes, ok. Charlie?”

The curly head nods but the eyes stay locked on the painting of a beach across the room.

“Overall, what percentage do you think you… give and what percent receive… that act?”

Charlie blinks. “Ummm. 75/25?”

“Ok and, in general, what percentage of the time do you actively make sure Nick finishes first?”

Charlie pulls in his lips. “90?” he whispers.

Cliff chuckles kindly. “Soooooo…” His hands rise from the desk and float apart in the air.

Charlie’s eyes dart to the other man’s face and away. He pulls his lips to one side. “I uhhhhh… I’m using a bad yardstick, huh?” Cliff nods.

The young man’s lips twist the other way as his eyes now trace the pattern in the rug and his hands settle in his lap.

When his face tilts back up, Cliff waits one more beat before offering, “So the One in Black is actually balancing out your relationship; does that feel accurate?” Charlie’s eyes widen in his direction; he blinks several times rapidly and then returns his attention to the rug.

“Charlie?” comes low and soft.

The dark head nods slowly.

“I think it’s great; he’s doing his job, looking out for you.” The strong jaw rocks up again and Charlie smiles at Cliff, his eyes twinkling. Cliff returns the look and raises the fingers of one hand off the desk in a wave pattern.

As his client’s face tilts away again, he adds, “I know not every couple cares about equity of orgasms and whatnot but I think you two do,” his head tilts. “Or Nick does anyway.” He pauses. “Yes?”

Charlie nods. “Yeah, we both do. We don’t keep score but I’m not interested in serving him that way and he’s definitely not.” Cliff makes an inquisitive noise.

Charlie looks up and blinks. “Oh.” He shrugs. “Just that I’m kinkier than him, that’s all.” He chuckles. “We figured that out early on. He likes the play, some of it a lot.” He grins and then shrugs again. “But it’s just play with us, especially him.”

His eyes unfocus. “One time, I bought him this…,” the bright eyes shift to the desk and then back to the far windows, “toy… and he wore it, like, ten minutes. Turned out he likes it better on me.” The grin returns.

Cliff blinks and clears his throat. “Ok. Well, your protector part taking a more active role in your life will be a journey; it may take time to right-size his voice but it sounds like it’s still pretty minor so far. Let’s talk about where you’re partnering with him outside the bedroom lately… or next?”

————————

[almost seven years later]

“Welcome to my practice, Charlie. Congrats on your new home. Please call me Steff.”

“Hi, thank you! Over here?”

“Yes, make yourself comfortable.”

Charlie sets his reusable water bottle on the ottoman and sinks easily into the couch. His new therapist folds one leg under herself and perches on the other end of the L shape facing his way. They smile at each other and review the basics: Charlie’s goals and desired frequency of sessions.

“That all sounds great. Tell me a bit about your previous therapists next, if you can.”

Charlie nods and fills her in on the highlights of his relationship with each man. He interweaves the breakthroughs he’d achieved and the approaches they’d used.

“Excellent, thank you! I want to go back and learn more about the Tiny Choices journey; is now a good time or should that be its own session?”

Charlie throws his head back and laughs. “Oh I’m sure it will come up in many sessions! In lots of ways, it’s still going.” His eyes drift around the room, noting the placement of windows and art.

He shrugs. “For now, I’ll just say that my husband is a genius and his,” he swallows, “his patience saved me. Healed me really. Is healing me still.” He looks over and sees the softness in her face. He smiles and nods. “Yeah, I got super lucky when I was younger.”

She taps the folder next to her. “I saw! You’ve been together since you were fourteen?!” Charlie’s face is all teeth and light as he nods vigorously.

“I know, right?! What are the odds?!”

She pulls her head to one side ruefully. “Luck is right; that is exceptional, that you’re still together and so functional by all accounts.” Charlie nods, dropping one hand along the back of the cushions, stretching out a bit as his legs cant together to one side.

“Also, it’s the kind of mindset we just use for almost everything now,” he shrugs. “Like buying this house. Very stressful! There were days I wanted to give up on the whole process.” Steff nods compassionately. “But we just reminded each other that we could move one tiny decision at a time.” He nods emphatically and then throws his arms wide. “And now here we are! A place where we can get a dog, start a family.” They smile at each other.

Steff nods happily. “Well and I am glad you’re here so now I can help you with your various maintenance plans and whatever else comes up.”

Charlie smiles. She pulls in her lips. He tilts his head.

“Are you ready for our first It’s My Job to Challenge Stuff You Say moment?” She smiles and wrinkles her nose. He sighs and nods. “Your husband,” she raises her hands and gestures with two fingers on each one, “healed you…?”

Charlie chuckles and nods. “Well, he certainly helped! But yes, you’re right; I’ve worked my butt off too. So let me tell you more about the Duke in Shadows and the One in Black and all the other parts in here,” he says, tapping the side of his head. She giggles and settles in for story time.

Chapter Text

Nick woke up first, as usual, but he wasn’t curled up with Charlie; it was too hot. They were both naked and on top of the single sheet remaining on the mattress. He was spread out on one side and his love was facing away, about as far as he could be.

Nick sighed; this heat wave was supposed to break in a few days but it appeared to be ruining their plans for this weekend. He took a moment to admire the muscles of Charlie’s shoulders and back and thighs anyway, his gaze lingering over the delicate curve of his favorite ass; as he did so, his body responded but he just sighed again and rolled up slowly to take his turn in the loo.

Then he came back to bed with a cool cloth on his forehead and fell into a restless slumber. He vaguely registered when Charlie got up some time later but then completely woke up when he exited the toilet. Both of them pulled on cotton pants and stumbled into the kitchen for some morning nibbles.

Sitting at the tiny table, they blearily smiled at each other over their mugs. Nick found himself offering, “I wanted to take you on a date today but… it’s too hot to get dressed…,” with an affectionate grimace.

Charlie nodded. “And I wanted to jump your bones today…,” he smirked as Nick shook his head, “but I think I might catch on literal fire if we try anything…”

They both sighed.

Nick looked towards the front of their flat, all the windows open wide trying to entice the breeze inside. “Too bad you can’t build us a wind tunnel to cool us off,” he mused. “Put that engineering degree to use on something besides the proper width of doorways in rehabilitated housing.” Charlie stuck his tongue out at him and they both chuckled.

After a minute, the older man stood and groaned and went to stick his head in the icebox for a bit. Charlie was lost in thought, eyes unfocused in the direction of the windows.

Eventually he cleared the table to the sink and then rummaged under it a moment, emerging with a handful of zipties from their rubbish bags. Nick pulled a bag of peas out to rest on his neck and watched Charlie lay the ties on the table and go retrieve the toolbox from the coat closet in the foyer next.

“What are you doing?”

“You wanted a wind tunnel.” The younger man shrugged. Nick’s mouth fell open. Charlie ducked into the bedroom to take a spare set of sheets out of the wardrobe there. He dumped those on a dining room chair.

“Can I help?”

“No, I’m making this up as I go; it would only distract me but thanks.” He smiled warmly and then tilted his head. “Can you maybe tweak our meal plan for the next few days so we’re not adding to the heatwave in here baking lasagna or something?”

Nick nodded happily and returned the peas to the icebox. Charlie took a nail and a hammer from the toolbox, reviewed the various walls in the common area and reached up to drive the nail in as high as he could manage near their bookcase.

Then he spread out one of the sheets, attached one corner of it to the nail with a zip tie and measured out one side. He placed a few more nails around the room, including some in the ceiling, in this manner until two sheets flapped there in the small wind.

Then he went into the bedroom and repeated the process. Nick followed him there humming a happy, aimless tune. “Dang if it doesn’t look like a vortex, Charlie; this is so cool!” His hand made a swooping motion to mirror the way the sheets swirled into the doorway from the kitchen and swirled back out to open over their bed.

They both stood there in the eye of it for a moment; Charlie closed his eyes and stretched his shoulders. Then he nodded and turned to the other man. “If you go take a quick shower and then lie down, I have one more thing to add and then you can tell me how well it works. Don’t dry off all the way; the water on your skin should help too.”

Nick smirked. “So this IS all a ploy to get me back into bed so you can jump my bones after all.” Their eyes twinkled at each other.

Charlie shrugged. “I mean… it would be nice to have some unhurried Sexy Times this week.” They both smiled a little ruefully.

Nick nodded as he removed his pants and threw them in the hamper. “Yeah. This is that adult life they warned us about… work, my rugby and your band practice, trivia night, film night… We are two busy dudes.” Charlie guffawed at that last word and they both waved fondly as Nick walked into the bathroom and Charlie returned to the kitchen.

Ten minutes later, Nick was flat on his back feeling the effects of those cool water droplets evaporating all over his body. He almost purred as Charlie stalked through to the bathroom but all he got in response was a big grin and a wink. Then he heard the shower turn back on.

By the time Charlie flopped down next to him, the heat had dried Nick off completely but he could feel a tendril or two of chill air curling around him. He turned his head. “What did you do there at the end?”

Charlie closed his eyes. “There’s a bowl on top of the bookcase with every piece of ice we have in it. It should generate a little cloud of cool that sinks down and comes through on the current.” He cracked open one eye and turned his head. “Theoretically.” They grinned at each other.

Nick faced the ceiling again and sighed contentedly. “Ice, huh? Next heatwave, let’s skip you building a pillow fort and just rub the ice directly on each other’s bodies.” Charlie snorted.

“Just one problem, babe. This is not technically a pillow fort.”

“Au contraire, mon amour; it contains pillows mais oui.” Nick threw his arms wide as the other man laughed. Then he sat up and turned to glance over the slender form next to him. He didn’t try to hide his admiration.

Turning onto his knees, he bent over the younger man and tilted his head, a fond smile on his face. “You, Charlie Spring, deserve a reward. I want you to lie here and enjoy yourself, got it?” Charlie blinked and wobbled his chin.

“Ooookay.” He put one arm up and tucked his hand behind his own head; crossing his ankles, he pulled his lips to one side and wrinkled his nose up at his beloved. “What did you have in mind?”

Nick grinned and bent down to kiss his forehead and then his cheek and then his collarbone. “This.” Then he licked slowly down and around one nipple. The smaller man arched and moaned softly. Nick kept their contact just his mouth and new patches of Charlie’s skin.

He left a line of saliva across the soft flat belly and watched the goose pimples form. He nosed the legs apart and worked several small love bites into the inner thighs. Charlie’s gasps were spurring him on.

Eventually he made himself a spot between the sinewy legs and let his hands draw the day’s first lines on Charlie’s quivering, engorged cock. He alternated, careful fingernails and fierce tongue, painting imaginary stripes up and down, around and around.

He let Charlie build and subside, build and subside. He shifted positions. He used his whole hand for a bit, spreading the honey dribbling there before licking it all off with strong wide strokes. He worshiped and relished and appreciated.

Finally he let his lips wrap around the bulb and he hummed with delight, sending shockwaves up Charlie’s spine and bringing his back off the bed. Nick’s head rose and fell. One hand dropped to push and pull in just the ways Charlie liked, along the shaft and lower and then lower still.

Nick adored knowing how to please his boyfriend. What moves were his favorites. There were no shortcuts with Charlie; his desire didn’t work that way. But there was a sort of… cheat sheet Nick had developed over time. He felt his heart warm in his chest with the awareness that his expertise would just continue to deepen over the years ahead.

Finally he was giving it his all, neck jackhammering until he thought he might need to reset, to pause and rest a bit, and help Charlie build yet another wave - maybe flip and let his hips do the work? - when he got the signal he should absolutely NOT stop. The tendons in every joint around his bobbing head lit up and lengthened at once, Charlie straining into his climax. Nick bore down and made sure not to vary his movements in any way.

All at once, his mouth was full and working out even more. He felt both bodies begin a long unwinding. His hands came up and gripped his favorite ass as he clung on through the shakes and shivers. Finally the quaking slowed and he was able to carefully pull off and swallow. Then he nosed into the hipbone on one side, causing more ripples as Charlie attempted to pull him away from certain nerve endings.

The sounds the plummy lips had been making all along resolved in one long drawn out shuddering of his name and Nick slid up his beloved grinning from ear to ear. “You called, love?”

One lean hand came up to pat randomly at Nick’s face. Playfully he licked and bit at it. “Nick!!! Come here, you wanker!” Charlie enveloped him in a tight hug, burying his face into Nick’s hair. Then he fell back with a giant happy sigh.

Nick settled into the bend of his arm and nuzzled at his ribs. “Thank you for the wind tunnel or I never would have been able to do all that. I think I’m ready for another shower though!”

“No, my turn on you first. Then a nap. THEN a shower where I get another turn.” Nick’s face was astonishment and amusement mixed. “I mean it! Today I may have come first but you’re gonna come more!”

Nick just shrugged and stretched out and closed his eyes. “Ok,” he said cheerfully.

Chapter Text

Nick ran his hands through his wet hair, bringing order out of the chaos. Then his hand fell to his jaw and felt the stubble there; he decided it could wait until morning. He knew nobody here at this gym in whatever city he was in right now and, while he hoped to make some new friends at a new gay bar he’d picked out to try after dinner, he wasn’t too concerned about looking his best. If they couldn’t accept him with five o’clock shadow wearing a t-shirt and joggers, they weren’t his kind of people anyway.

He picked up his stuff out of the locker and headed out into the evening, checking his phone for the nearest curry shop.

Having chatted with the busy lady running the counter there and even helped her bag up takeaway for other customers, Nick was smiling and humming as he left the tiny restaurant, mobile once again in hand as he made a note of its name in his folder for this work trip. The food was yummy, the location was convenient and he’d definitely love to see if he could make Mrs. Badhan tut at him in that motherly way again.

He called up the next app for a ride to the bar he’d chosen. He felt buoyant. His inspection of the facility this morning had gone well, he was still feeling the endorphins of his workout and his tummy was pleasantly full. He looked forward to a beer, maybe two, and the chance to meet some rainbow people before heading back to the perfectly adequate lodging and a video call with his boyfriend. Life was good.

From outside, the Badger’s Cane looked pretty low key, more like a local pub. It was a weeknight; Nick hoped it was a mellow place which encouraged conversations. As he stepped past the burly man at the door, he saw the inside resembled a pub as well.

There was a long counter with stools along it and a good assortment of tables, some small and some large, scattered around. In one corner, there was a minuscule stage with a karaoke machine but tonight the lights were off in that area.

There were a couple of occupied stools and a friendly-seeming barkeep. One of the tables had about ten people around it already. Nick’s head turned left and then right, scanning again. Yeah, everyone here appeared to be a man. And white. Hunh.

The well-muscled guy behind the counter waved him over with a smile. “Welcome! What’ll ya have?”

Nick shook himself and crossed the space optimistically. “Hi, thanks! Do you have any Belgians on tap?” He made his selection and leaned against the bar, pulling out his wallet.

They finished the transaction and the bartender, glancing again at the young man’s face, settled nearby to dry some glasses. “New in town? Don’t remember seeing you before.”

Nick took a long appreciative drag on the beer. “Ahh, that’s tasty. Um yeah, I’m here for work actually. Just passing through and looking for a quiet evening amongst friendly folk.” He smiled shyly, his lower lip and chin jutting out as he aimed for the proper amount of approachability.

The other man nodded. “Well, we got the quiet part down, don’t we?” He barked a short laugh. “Just a few regulars and the Tuesday Toppers.” He indicated the group at the big table. “Friday, Saturday - this place is more banging but maybe that’s not your scene.”

Nick huffed. “It is not.” He took another pull from his pint.

Just then, two men stood up from the table and came over to order the next round. The shorter one spotted Nick right away and hustled up to him. “Well hello there, fresh meat.” He grinned, his thick neck and face both reddish under his grey crew cut.

Nick blinked.

The taller man, who sported a full beard but a gleaming scalp, strolled up behind and swatted him on the shoulder. “Jack, be nice. You’ll scare him.” He rolled his eyes and then smiled at Nick before extending his hand. “I’m Tom. We don’t bite.”

“Unless asked!” growled Jack as he turned his face to the bartender. Tom stepped closer to Nick as they began their exchange.

“Don’t mind him. What’s your name?” Tom’s eyes were giving Nick the once over; hoping it was a friendly look, Nick shook his hand, cleared his throat and said his name. “So, Nick… I hope you don’t take this the wrong way but are you sure you’re in the right place?” Tom’s mouth was an ambiguous curl but his eyes seemed kind.

Before Nick could do more than blink and start to nod, Jack was on his other side gripping his bicep. “Sure he is, Tommy me boy; look at this. He’s one of us gym rats.” The two men grimaced at each other; Nick couldn’t be sure how much of this was banter.

He coughed and focused on Tom. “I came looking for rainbow friends in a gay bar, if that’s what you mean.” He followed this up with a half-smile and another sip of his beer. Tom seemed to relax at that and Jack laughed loudly.

“Told you! Oi, carry these.” The two men started to load up the new drinks. Then Jack turned back to Nick and winked. “I see your drink is still fresh or I’d offer you one. You can come sit with us; you’re a top, right?”

Nick blinked as the other men started to turn away. He was not used to being asked about his sexual preferences in a casual context but he remembered what the barkeep had called the group. And… well… he was… sometimes.

“Oh um,” he looked over at the table. “Yeah.” He picked up his glass plus one of the others and trailed after them, squeezing in between Tom and another man, with Jack reclaiming his chair across the table from him.

He was introduced around but none of the other names really stuck. He got a chance to say a little about his work and his agenda - a lot of heads wobbled sympathetically when he explained how draining a traveling job could be and how good it felt to be making new friends within the community all across his service region. Then the group fell back into smaller knots of conversation; Nick was mostly quiet, letting the brown ale soothe his nerves.

At one point, he got to weigh in on a rugby debate and enjoy the rush of helping one side of the table win their talking point. He was slapped on the back; he felt the threads of belonging knit together in his heart.

Jack continued to be a boisterous presence, dominating many an interaction with his volume and opinions. Nick noticed the other men mostly deferring to him and then he noticed how the entire group was definitely the same type, physically. All well-toned, if not outright ripped. All bulky, thick-bodied. All older than him, he thought.

He had just started to frown as he tried to think of what it might mean, that he fit into this particular group given he was used to more diversity in all its aspects, when he heard Jack say, “Yeah, it couldn’t last. He kept forgetting his place.”

Nick’s frown deepened as he turned his attention to the dialogue Jack was in. It seemed like the usual complaints about dating, being single, looking for a connection; Nick knew how to be a good listener when his friends needed to vent about that, even if he couldn’t relate. He understood how lucky he was to be happily partnered up since he was sixteen.

But something was stinging inside his gut, little prickles climbing up and tightening his shoulders. And then he heard Jack say, “These younger twinks think they’re in charge. I swear they all want to top from the bottom!”

And Nick heard himself blurt out, “You say that like it’s a bad thing!” In his mind’s eye, a vision of Charlie rose up so intense, it made him twitch. The black mask, the claws, the corset, the way he drew pleasure out of Nick again and again, the way he rode Nick’s cock up high… literally in charge and on top.

When he shook free from the memory, he found himself in a pool of silence. Everyone was staring at him. Jack’s face was an unfriendly scowl. “Uhhh, yeah. Because it is. We’re tops, see?” He gestured at the table and most of the others nodded; it felt like a wall of anger rising up.

Nick swallowed. “Some of the best sex I’ve ever had,” he ventured, “my huh, my boyfriend was power bottoming.” He could feel the flush rushing up his torso, his cheeks.

Jack’s mouth was a thin line. He planted his hands on the arms of his chair. Nick felt the soles of his feet tingle, ready for anything. “Yeah? Well, we don’t go for that here.” Again his head wave gathered the animosity of the group and threw it at Nick. His hands tightened, the knuckles white.

“Fuck, you probably like getting porked too, dontcha? One of ‘em so-called switches. Well, we’re real men and you can fuck off then.”

Nick licked his lips and raised his hands slowly from his empty pint, maintaining steady eye contact with Jack the whole time. He started to stand so incrementally that nobody could take it as a threatening move.

Once he was fully straightened up, the whole room took a breath and he swept his eyes over the men at the table. Tom wouldn’t look up at him. Nick sighed and started to step away.

When he was halfway to the door, a low murmur started up behind him but immediately died out when he turned and regarded them again for a beat before announcing, rather sadly, “Wow, for a group of gay men, you really don’t seem to like gay sex.”

That got him some gasps and at least one offended shout so he tucked his tail and dashed out the door. Seeing no immediate options, he chose a direction at random and put a few blocks between him and the bar as quickly as possible.

Then he paused, listened while he caught his breath and pulled out his phone to summon a ride back to his hotel. As he stood there, his breathing sped back up until he was choking back sobs, trying not to call attention to himself on this street. He shook himself fiercely and stared at his phone.

When the ride got there, he slumped in the back seat and let the tears flow freely. Then he wiped his face and paid the driver. Walking up to his room, he pulled out his mobile one more time, his feet dragging on the carpet.

|Gonna skip our FT tonite, hon, and just sleep. Can’t wait to see u tomorrow. XXXXXXXXX|

Chapter Text

Nick opened the door to their flat at 3:15 and barely had enough time to drop his things and toe off his shoes before he was enveloped in a big hug. His forehead went straight to Charlie’s shoulder where it met his neck and they stood there in the foyer for several quiet minutes. Nick just breathed, his tears all shed through the long lonely night.

“Bubby… you ready to talk about what happened?” Charlie’s hands were in Nick’s hair, rubbing circles and massaging his scalp. Nick pushed into it and then gently shook his head, nose and lips digging into Charlie’s neck slightly. The air in the room changed as he did so. “Oh. Ok.”

Nick swayed back enough to look into the dazzling eyes which held him in thrall all these years. His focus shifted back and forth as his lips curled in and out.

“What is it, love? I got you,” Charlie murmured.

Nick swallowed and nodded. “I…,” his voice was raspy. “I need you.” The dark head just nodded. Nick stepped back and scooped him up bridal style. Charlie’s mouth quirked fondly as his hands came up around Nick’s neck. Nick leaned in for a brief kiss and then marched into the bedroom where he gently lay the smaller man down on the mattress. Still fully clothed, he pressed in on him, the length of their bodies connecting from chest to knees. He bent down and reclaimed the other’s lips with his own.

It quickly became heated, intense. Nick was driving their mouths together again and again, tongue searching, sucking Charlie’s into his. He pulled back so they could both gasp for oxygen. Then he rolled them so the younger man was above him and pulled him down for another round.

Finally Charlie wrenched them apart so they could breathe again. He took in Nick’s face: open, panting, desperate. “What, what do you need, babe?” He began planting kisses along the jawline, the temple, the ear. Nick whined and clawed at him.

“You! I need you!” More kisses. “Char…” More moans. “My Charlie…” Hands clutching at clothes. “Please… please fuck me.” Low, husky, needy. Charlie pulled back and found the brown eyes. Nick gulped and nodded with increasing vigor. “Yes. Fuck me, take me, bend me over.” Charlie blinked and nodded. Nick subsided and the curly head lowered to start a new wave of hungry, urgent kisses.

Then one lean hand found the nearest bicep and started to push down, sliding and pushing until Nick’s arm was pinned down and their fingers were intertwined. The larger man was groaning wildly into Charlie’s mouth now, his hips bucking up looking for friction.

Charlie reared back and smirked. Using his free hand, he pivoted and stood up; then he pulled their interlocked hands until Nick stood too. Then he dropped their connection and began unbuttoning Nick’s shirt. When he tried to help, Charlie swatted his hands away. “I got you, babe,” he tutted. Nick’s face pulsed with feeling and he gave a watery smile as Charlie pulled the fabric down his back and off his arms.

Next the drummer’s hands were undoing his belt and sliding all his bottoms off as a unit. Halfway through came a gentle tap on one naked hip and Nick flopped back to sit on the bed so they could be dragged off his feet. Charlie paused and considered the shamrock print socks, smiled and left them on. Then he stooped and picked up all the clothes in a bundle, turned and stepped to the hamper. While he was there, he quickly pulled off his t-shirt, joggers and pants, leaving him in black knee-high socks.

When he turned back to the bed, Nick raised his feet and wiggled his toes at him. Charlie grinned and came to stand between the outstretched legs. “You’re a goof, Mister Nelson.” He wrapped his arms around the broad shoulders and ruffled the soft hair. Nick nuzzled into his bare chest and rumbled happily.

“I’m YOUR goof, Mister Spring.” Charlie set his hands on each cheek and pulled Nick’s head so they were looking at each other, one up and one down. He nodded gently.

“Mine.”

“Yours.”

The air was soft. Smiles. Lingering kisses. Hands roaming.

The air began to crackle. Knobby fingers tugged at light locks. Plummy lips left marks on freckled skin. Frenzied noises filled the room.

Nick was belly down on their special blanket now, Charlie kneeling between his legs, hands lubed and dipping into place. Nick clutched a pillow and gasped again and again as the skillful fingers circled and prodded and entered and stretched and crooked and rubbed and scissored and thrust just right.

Charlie then grabbed a towel, wiped off his hands and grabbed Nick’s hips. He eased his aching cock in bit by bit, both men closing their eyes and moaning from initial contact through to the end. Charlie rested there, fully engulfed, until Nick whimpered and wiggled for more.

He shifted his knees and braced himself so he could drive down into Nick’s prone body. After the first few strokes, the larger man was nearly shouting into his pillow. Charlie was crashing them together and shaking Nick’s entire frame, trusting the mattress to provide enough friction for his sensitive man.

Sure enough, Nick’s head was back within a few minutes as he gave voice to the waves of pleasure cresting through him. Charlie slowed but did not stop. His movements were still smooth, steady, even as Nick thrashed under him. Only when all the muscles in the broad back relaxed at once, only then did Charlie still his grinding hips.

He bent forward to breathe against the rosy skin. Nick’s breathing was ragged yet he was giggling softly. Charlie hummed his question into Nick’s shoulder as he pulled out and sank down next to him. Nick’s neck turned suddenly and his face came into view, tomato red, mouth open and curved up in one corner.

“That’s a good start to making things better,” he huffed. Charlie just smiled. Nick lifted up and then flipped onto his back, managing not to crowd the other man as he did. He glanced over and looked his lover up and down. Then he licked his lips. “Will you,” he whispered, “hmmmm, will you sit on my face next please?” Charlie’s smile widened.

As he sat up, Nick scootched down and they slotted together, Charlie’s heels against the headboard as he vocally appreciated the view of Nick’s refracting body stretched out in front of him. Nick just quietly grabbed one cheek in each meaty hand and got to work. His tongue slid and probed and circled. He lightly nipped where he could with his teeth. He reached up and suctioned. He pistoned until he had to fall back, groaning with want.

Charlie sat back and brought his passage more fully in contact, letting Nick just stiffen his tongue and doing the work rocking in and out of himself. Then he reached over and gathered some lube; as he took his cock in hand, he resumed driving back onto Nick’s face until both of them were moaning loudly.

He tilted forward, falling on one hand to the side of Nick’s torso. His eyes were closed as he chased the last ascent. Nick brought one of his hands around, using two fingers to gather all the spit he’d generated and push it inside just in time to drive Charlie over the final distance.

He could feel the proof hitting his stomach and groin; he cried out in tune with his beloved, holding him with both arms now. Charlie recovered just enough to see where his spasms had landed him; he whined and lunged forward those last inches to take Nick’s restored erection fully into his mouth.

Nick’s yell came with an arched back and a tightening to his embrace of Charlie’s lower half. They both groaned low in their throats. The curly head bobbed and panted; one hand snaked up to use the last of his lube on Nick’s balls and perineum. Nick’s gasps were delirious. When one knobby finger reentered his back door and bent just so, Nick found himself cumming again, even harder.

Charlie hummed and gulped and moaned, drawing out every delicious noise he could from the man under him. Finally he collapsed to one side and they both waited for their lungs to recover something resembling normalcy.

Nick threw one hand onto his face and sent the other looking for any part of his lover. Patting one thigh, he giggled again. Charlie’s smile returned and he leaned over to press a passionate kiss to the wide hips. “Better,” they said at the same time and then they were both laughing, still breathless.

Chapter Text

After some rearranging and cuddling and dozing and showering, Nick was finally ready for the talking. Having moved straight to their sleep clothes, they grabbed some snacks and settled into place at their tiny table for an easy dinnertime.

After munching a while in companionable silence, Nick leaned back and indicated he could share now; Charlie’s head made affirmative bobbles. They smiled at each other. Nick ran one hand through his fringe and cleared his throat.

“Ahhh so last night, I tried a new bar and… met some lads who turned out to be proper arseholes.” Charlie’s eyes were compassionate already. “They… it was a group? of tops? like, that was their thing?” Charlie’s head tilted. “Yeah, weird, right? I dunno; at first, it was fine. Normal. Banter and sports and just normal.”

Nick’s eyes drifted. “But then the ringleader, he uh…,” Nick started to fiddle with his plate. “He was complaining about a datemate,” he swallowed, “topping from the bottom.” Charlie tried to hold in a snort. “I know! Complaining!”

Their smiles were knowing, their eyes twinkling. Nick shrugged. “Their loss really.” He smirked as Charlie flushed and wiggled in his seat. The moment stretched and settled.

Nick sighed and nodded. “Yeah, their loss. Anyway I said something and they got hostile. It was scary and… unsettling and… it really threw me coz I’d been feeling… like I was making new friends.” One of Charlie’s hands snaked across the table to rest lightly on the back of Nick’s. “Instead I ended up running out of there.” The dark eyes were locked on a point on the floor without seeing it.

“And I knew I could call you but… I dunno… I worried it would send us both on a spiral if you couldn’t really comfort me because we weren’t together.” Nick’s mouth and face twisted sideways a moment. “So I just felt all my feelings and thinked all my thoughts and came home to you as fast as I could.” His head and eyes had come back up and he smiled fondly at his beloved.

“Niiiick.”

He swallowed again. “I know, next time… maybe I text you something and you call me when you can… dunno, deal? with it?” Charlie nodded firmly.

“Yes, text me AND text a friend too. Even if we can’t talk right then for whatever reason, at least you’ll have people who know what’s up. Please, Nick… You don’t have to protect me from your feelings.” Nick nodded, his hand turning so it could grip the one which had been stroking it.

“Ok I will. I know. You take really good care of me, Char. I just…,” his eyes unfocused again. After a few beats, he shook himself and turned back with some new resolve. “I was thinking thoughts about us.” Charlie blinked, eyebrows high. Nick smiled reassuringly.

“God, I love you so much.” His lopsided smile deepened. “I love US! How we work!” His free hand came up and waved broadly to include their flat. “How we WORK.” That hand came and joined the ones already entwined. “We take care of each other. We do what feels good TO US… Loving you is so easy.” His whole body was lined up, laser focused on Charlie now. The brown eyes searched the blue.

Charlie just grinned quietly, his face open and adoring. Nick felt like he was sixteen all over again. His stomach fluttered.

All at once, he shifted around the table, ending up on both knees next to the other’s chair. His arms were tight around Charlie’s waist and his head found its home on the narrow shoulder. One knobby hand came up to feather into the hair at the nape of his neck as his embrace was reciprocated.

He nuzzled there a moment. “I was thinking there was only one part of last night where I wanted to change MY behavior,” he mumbled into the smaller man’s neck. Charlie hummed his interest. “When I told them that some of the best sex I’ve EVER had was you… you know,” they both chuckled, “well, it didn’t sit right calling you my boyfriend.”

Charlie stilled. Nick noticed and plunged on, pulling back slightly so he could watch the other’s face. “I know we haven’t really said it out loud yet, Char, but when I look at the future, I just see you. And I think you feel the same but it’s just been always some vague someday and well…,” he swallowed again. “I want it to be sooner than that. I want to call you my husband and I want to buy a home with you and I want to have kids with you and I want to grow old with you.”

Charlie’s eyes were shining, his lips were pulled in as he watched this tumult in wonder. Nick paused and took him in and grinned. “Marry me, Charles Francis Spring.” They both laughed a little breathlessly.

Then Charlie’s eyes started going back and forth, looking down at their position. “Uhhhh.” Nick frowned and pulled back.

“Wot?”

Charlie smirked. “I don’t see a ring, sir.” One eyebrow had disappeared into the curls, it was cocked so high. Nick sputtered and fell back, sitting on his thighs. His hands landed in his lap as the younger man stood, leaned down to lightly kiss him and murmured, “Be right back.”

As the slender form stalked through the bedroom door, Nick shook his head and climbed back onto his chair. “What just happened?!” he called out.

“Just a second!” came a muffled shout. When he emerged, one lean hand was mysteriously wrapped around something. He beelined to Nick’s seat and dropped to one knee in front of him. His hands came up to reveal and open a small blue velvet box.

Nick blinked and pulled in his lips, noting the smug look on his beloved’s face. He shook his head ruefully. “Ok you little shit but I did it first.”

Charlie’s expression couldn’t hold in the delight any longer; he was relishing every second of this. Nick just beamed at him and jutted his chin down, telling him without words to get on with it.

“Nicholas Luke Nelson, will you marry me?” His voice was taunting at first and husky by the end. They both swallowed. And smiled. And laughed.

Nick nodded. “Yessir, I will.” They both blinked back tears as Charlie took the ring out of its place and picked up Nick’s left hand. Their foreheads nearly touching, they watched as Charlie turned it and slid it on. Nick peered at it closely before stretching his arm and seeing the overall effect. His eyes found the other man’s and his brows quirked up.

Charlie nodded and leaned over it. “It’s a claddagh because of your Nana. When it’s like this on your left hand, you’re engaged. After the wedding, you turn it round, heart facing in.” Their eyes reconnected, awash with feeling. Charlie swallowed. “And it’s steel, not silver.” He shrugged. “For me.” He smiled with one side of his mouth.

Nick pulled him in tight and squeezed. He burrowed his face into the curls on the side of his head. He tried to breathe.

“It’s perfect.”

They relaxed into each other.

“My fiancé.” They pulled back and nearly split their faces, they were grinning so hard. Nick’s hand came up and cupped Charlie’s jaw. He leaned in for a kiss and lingered there a long time, turning and slotting together again and again.

Finally Charlie pulled back with a small groan and jerked his head in the direction of the sofa. They both smiled and got up and then sighed happily as they settled back together more comfortably. Cuddling there, Nick caught himself looking at his hand in a daze.

“Of course you were prepared and I wasn’t,” he chuckled. He shook his head fondly at the younger man’s giggles. “I will make it up to you, I swear. I’ll ask Elle and Tara to help me pick out the best ring ever.” Charlie just nodded and nuzzled into the broad chest. “This is quite handsome… Thank you, love.” He leaned down for more languid kisses.

———————

Six weeks later, they had a venue already booked for the following summer, giving them just over a year to plan the ceremony. Nick just laughed quietly as he shook his head. “Of course! That’s the overthinking brain I fell in love with.” He captured Charlie’s left hand and brought it up for a kiss. Right over the custom ring there.

Charlie blushed and stared down at it again. His right hand came over to give the spinner part a go, fingertips catching on the tiny blue diamond chips spaced along that middle part. A sensory experience he was already learning to love. And rose gold for his strawberry blonde fiancé… It all felt perfect.

He smirked up at his love. “Don’t think this counts as my birthday present by the way.”

Nick’s laugh was loud and carefree.

Chapter Text

The subcommittees had spilled out of the smaller conference rooms ready to make their presentations to the large group but the third one had been interrupted by people from other teams over the issue of law enforcement presence.

Nick excused himself from the seats the Recruitment group had claimed, looking for Charlie as he made his way to the refreshments table for some water and crisps. Stepping up behind the rows of folding chairs munching away, he finally found the Policy group with his eyes but sighed; it was not worth the hassle of trying to get over to him right now.

They smiled at each other, affectionate and amused and maybe a trifle annoyed. These meetings always ran long as the facilitators tried to build consensus; just because they believed in the process didn’t mean Nick and Charlie found it fun.

An hour later, Nick had helped pass a bunch of water bottles through the crowd so they spread out across the room and was finishing his second bag of crisps when he saw Charlie tip his bottle in salute and drink from it. He grinned and raised his own as though they were near each other, about to tink them together and say “cheers”.

The topic now was floats and Nick’s subcommittee had shared their update already when one of the more vocal troublemakers started up again, this time about why they had included a kink group. Both men lowered their bottles and frowned into the center of the room where a line formed by the microphone.

Nick rolled his eyes as another heated debate started up but he stayed attentive this time. At one point, he caught Charlie’s eyes again as one of their friends made a good point and he smirked. He saw one of the striking eyebrows launch up in confusion. He licked his lips and raised a hand to his face.

He bracketed two fingers and drew them from one ear to another as though outlining a mask over his eyes. He rolled his lips and dropped that hand to spread upon his chest and pat there twice, all while maintaining intense eye contact. He felt tingles up and down his spine as he saw realization dawn in the other man’s face and a matching smirk form.

His hand fell and he bounced on his heels, completely ready for this meeting to end soon so he could go home with his smoking hot fiancé and find out if the One in Black might be available tonight. He looked around to make sure nobody else was getting distracted by their eye fucking across the crowded room.

So it caught him by surprise when he heard Charlie’s voice become amplified; his head whipped back to focus on the speaker area.

“As Max said so well a minute ago, Pride started as a riot, not a show for kids. Kinksters belong at Pride because all of us should refuse to cut ourselves off from that history. We don’t have to live in closets and we don’t have to deny the disruptors who won us what legal protections we have.”

Nick’s chest was swelling with so much feeling as he watched the curly-haired man speak his truth.

“There are parts of this year’s Pride we are making especially family-friendly but not everything has to be rated PG. Let’s celebrate what makes us special, what makes us different, by embracing the full diversity of love.”

The freckled face was crinkled up with delight, a wide grin making the brown eyes nearly disappear. Charlie paused and turned towards him in the hush of the room. “Nelson and I will join the kink float.” He winked as Nick’s brain short-circuited.

He felt someone clapping him on the back and vaguely registered their encouraging words. The next person to step up and congratulate him pierced his haze a little bit when they pointed out their popularity as a couple seemed to be swaying the overall opinion of the group. Nick only had eyes for his beloved who smiled rakishly and drained his water bottle without breaking eye contact. His spine was tingling again.

————————-

Much much later that night, Nick panted and whined. “Ok but I am never going to make it through a two or three hour parade if you’re there; I will have a giant embarrassing stiffy the entire time!!”

A lean hand reached up and patted his cheek fondly. “No, you won’t. I will take care of my man, I promise.”

Chapter Text

[Saturday - one week until the parade]

Charlie insisted they clean their flat from top to bottom. They caught up on chores. They snacked at the table and on the couch. They took breaks to play MarioKart. But when Nick cozied up for another kind of break, Charlie gently declined; then he threw the tea towel at him and asked him to work on the fridge with another one of those smirks. Nick huffed… and tingled… and cooperated.

[Sunday]

Charlie wrote up a bunch of meal plans. They went grocery shopping and bought more than usual. Nick spent a couple of hours at the gym a few blocks away. They watched a movie. They cuddled. And then Charlie rolled over and made like he was going to sleep. Nick nuzzled into his shoulder blades and tried not to whine.

Charlie pulled his top arm tighter around himself and patted Nick’s hand. “I know, bubby. I have a plan. Trust me?” Nick sighed. And nodded. And closed his eyes.

[Monday]

They went out for brunch and enjoyed an uncrowded restaurant. They took a long walk around the neighborhood. They had fun at trivia night even though their team didn’t win. They snuggled and Nick let himself drift off holding his beloved to his chest.

[Tuesday]

Charlie sent Nick back to the gym in the morning. After showers and some lunch, he announced he had a surprise for their afternoon. Nick let the tingles return.

Out they went, to a shopping centre he didn’t know. Charlie even covered his eyes with one hand as they walked over and into a shop. Nick’s face at the reveal made Charlie grin.

The fluorescent lights were bright as Nick took in the rows of upholstered seats and the wall of nail polish. As they settled in and started with a warm foot bath, he relaxed and copied the grin.

“Mani-pedis?” he asked with a delighted uplift to his voice. Charlie just nodded, pulling in his lips as he appraised Nick’s expression. The older man leaned back and took a deep breath. “So far, this feels GREAT.” Charlie’s smirk returned. Nick smiled shyly at him… and tingled.

Later he watched as his fiancé directed the staff to make rainbow stripes on both his toes and his fingers. Charlie himself got black. Nick’s gaze was stuck on the other man’s hands as they bent and shifted under the employee’s ministrations.

When the dazzling eyes caught him staring, he blushed. He licked his lips. “We should… we should do this more often,” he said, a trifle breathlessly.

Charlie smirked again. It was becoming a little insufferable but it still made Nick’s chest hitch a bit. The brown eyes flicked from lips to eyes to curls to lips.

Charlie let his smile soften. “We should.”

When they got home, Charlie didn’t give him a moment to pause. He pulled out clothes for each of them and then fussed over makeup choices in the bathroom for almost an hour. Nick found himself with blush and lip gloss; he blinked and decided he looked rather nice, glowy even.

Charlie was frustrated applying his eyeliner in particular, trying and wiping and trying again until he was finally satisfied it had the proper swoop to it. Mascara and a subtle purpley lipstick completed his look.

Nick could not look away. He wanted to nuzzle Charlie’s neck so bad. He wanted to ruin their makeup the instant it was finished. He sucked his lips in and breathed sharply out his nose, his hands stretching and contracting at his sides.

Charlie turned from the mirror and took him in. Smiling carefully, he closed the gap between them and let their foreheads touch as Nick leaned down to inhale shakily. The lean hands came up to stroke the wide biceps.

“Soon, bubby. Soon.”

Nick nodded and followed Charlie out of the flat. Dinner was somewhere new yet his love ordered confidently for the both of them; clearly he had researched the place and Nick noticed his hips and spine were unwinding and tingling at the same time. He’d never felt that combination before. He sipped his wine and lost himself in Charlie’s eyes.

After dinner was a new nightclub. Not exclusively queer but welcoming nonetheless; Nick could see multiple couples that felt like “their people” from this spot tucked between the bar and the DJ booth. Charlie bought them both two rounds before leading him out to the dance floor and locking their pelvises together the way he liked.

As they stumbled in the door to their building, Charlie paused and turned them both back towards the street lamps glowing gold against the jet sky. “Say goodbye to outside, bubby.” Nick giggled and waved at the night, quirking his eyebrows high.

Charlie smirked once more and laid a hand firmly on Nick’s chest, pushing him fully inside. “You won’t be seeing it for a few days.”

Chapter Text

Nick woke up alone. He pulled himself up onto his elbows and saw two things within the first 30 seconds. Charlie had left him water and pain relievers on the side table. And there was eyeliner and/or mascara smeared all over his groin.

He fell back chuckling and then groaning.

The curly head poked in through the open door from the kitchen. Once he saw Nick roll towards the cabinet, he disappeared again. Nick slowly made his way to the loo and emerged some time later looking a little better. After he pulled on a pair of trackies, he poked his head out, unconsciously mirroring his love from earlier.

He saw Charlie, fresh as a daisy in a simple t-shirt and shorts, ladling pasta and sauce into a row of plastic containers. He turned and checked the time. He shook his head and wandered over to the table.

Within a few minutes, the containers were stacked in the fridge, the pots were soaking in the sink and he had a cuppa at his elbow. Charlie bounced onto the chair across from him. “Are you up for some toast yet?” Nick shook his head and sipped on the tea. The younger man bounced back up and into the bedroom.

After several minutes, he returned and asked again, his voice gentle. This time, Nick nodded and Charlie turned to rustle that up. He sat down again with two plates and passed one of them across. They smiled easily at each other and crunched their way through their breakfast, otherwise quiet.

As Charlie cleared the table, Nick sat back and cleared his throat. The dark head turned; Nick examined his expression and rolled his neck. “Can I ask why you’re up so early and so chipper and making takeaways?!” Charlie smirked and didn’t say anything until after he wiped his fingers and sat down again.

One of his hands drummed on the table top. His head tilted. “I may have… made sure to pour most my drinks into yours when you weren’t looking last night…” Nick’s eyebrows started to rise. “And set an alarm on vibrate… so I could get up before you and prepare some of our… sustenance for the next little while…” Nick’s eyes were wide. “But that’s all the legwork done so…” His hand floated up and turned over and splayed out towards the other man.

Nick shook his head. “Charlie,” he huffed. “Legwork?! Sustenance?! Like we’re going camping or something? But we’re not leaving the flat, you said. What IS this plan?!” His beloved just smirked. Nick grimaced and yet… he felt those tingles tickling down his back again…

“Did you…,” the dark head tilted, “you didn’t… take a shower this morning?”

“No?!” Nick blushed. “Was I supposed to? Was that part of your plan?”

The thick eyebrows bunched. “Why n…,” they jumped up, “Were you… do you think you need my permission?!”

“Yes?!” Nick sputtered. At Charlie’s incredulous reaction, he leaned forward. “Char! You’ve taken complete charge! All week!” He fell back. “If you’d been in the room, hell… I mighta asked you if I could use the toilet this morning!”

They looked at each other. Nick saw nothing but delight and wonder in the other’s face. His embarrassment pulsed as he tried to work through what was happening inside him, what these reactions meant. Something had shifted since the planning meeting; it was surfacing now in this vacation.

Charlie pursed his lips for a few beats and then nodded to himself before leaning both elbows on the table and bending over them winsomely. “Niiiiick. Let me take care of you a few more days, through the parade. That’s all this is, I swear.”

Nick wrenched his eyes away from where the strong knobby hands had intertwined, his mouth parting slightly. “Taking… care of me…,” he breathed. Charlie nodded, something starting to ignite deep in his eyes. Nick licked his lips. “He… you did promise…” Charlie sat up straighter and nodded again.

“Exactly,” he hissed. His chin jerked slightly to one side. “I got you, Nelson. I am going,” his eyes were boring a hole right into Nick, “to make sure,” his arms pulled back, “you’re ready for Saturday.” His lips curled on one side. “That you’re ready for me to show you off. That you’re ready to make me proud.” His jaw arched suddenly, a challenge, an invitation. “The plan… is… to empty you, my love. Drain you dry.”

Nick felt nailed to his chair. He felt his blood simmering. He felt his hips buzzing. He felt his breath speeding up and faltering through his open mouth. He felt his vision lose focus.

He closed his eyes and just felt it all a few moments. He let his shoulders fall. He got one breath to go into his belly. He made a decision. One he knew encompassed a myriad of “yes”s, an entire collection of tiny choices leading him to this point and another collection spreading before him.

He opened his eyes and fell into the whirlpool named Charlie Spring. “I’m yours,” he smiled.

Chapter Text

Charlie watched Nick take in the plan. His arousal. His settling confusion. His moment of no return.

When the brown eyes met his and he heard the affirmation he craved, he released the breath he’d been holding, slowly out his nose. His top lip bent even more. Something low inside his pelvis expanded and retracted into new coils and loops.

He stood and held out one hand in a courtly manner. “Shall we?” They smiled at each other. Nick placed one hand on top of his and rose into the space offered, maintaining eye contact the while. Charlie used their joined hands to pull him closer and lifted his other hand to cup Nick’s cheek.

“I got you,” he said softly. Nick’s eyes closed and he nuzzled into the hand. Charlie dropped his other hand out of Nick’s and wrapped that arm around his back, stepping in and sealing that final distance between them. He laid his head on Nick’s shoulder, nosing gently against the hollow of his throat.

The hand on his face rubbed and scratched its way around the side and back of Nick’s head until it drew him down for a kiss. They lingered on each other’s lips, slow and soft.

“I got you,” he repeated, pulling back and reclaiming one of Nick’s hands to pull him into the bedroom. Pausing by the closet, he bent and pushed Nick’s trackies down to his ankles. Then he moved back, waved at the mattress and removed his own clothes.

Nick stepped out of the bottoms and went to sit on the edge of the bed where he saw their special blanket already carefully smoothed out. Charlie deposited the pile in the hamper and came to stand in between his legs.

He reached down and pulled Nick’s left hand up to his own face, humbled by the trusting brown eyes. The broad hand was warm against his lips and Charlie closed his eyes a moment. He gathered his fire, his molten steel.

Then he drew the older man’s hand back slightly as his chin angled and he dove his mouth straight into the center of the palm with a fierce kiss which ended with him raking the front of his teeth across the full width, all while hearing Nick’s gasps. He pulled the meaty base under the thumb into his mouth and gently bit down; he paused there to relish once more the feel of his fiancé’s flesh in his mouth.

After a few beats, he lifted off just enough to let his lips glide over the skin and he breathed in the other man’s familiar scent. Then the tip of his tongue poked out and he dragged it up the length of the thick thumb where he.. just… wrapped his mouth completely around it and found the broad pad reflexively pushing hard against his tongue; both men whimpered quietly.

He suctioned on the digit for a few beats until he had Nick panting. Then he slowly pulled the thumb out past his plummy lips, making sure he had the other man’s full attention as he licked over to and engulfed the next finger. One by one, he drew them in and out of his mouth. His tongue dove in between until it paused over the engagement ring, teasing and toying with its edges there a full minute, Nick transfixed.

Grinning, Charlie finished with a few wet juicy swipes of his tongue across the palm before guiding this hand to Nick’s throbbing member. He nodded and hissed, “On your knees, Nelson.” The broad-shouldered man jumped up and turned around, eagerly presenting his ass as he climbed up without losing his grip on himself.

Charlie spread his cheeks and planted his face there a few minutes. As Nick’s noises began to reach a certain pitch, he straightened and stepped back a moment. He watched and listened as Nick danced and sang for him, lust billowing off of him.

Smiling to himself, he turned to the cabinet and gathered what he needed. Then he stepped up so his groin brushed against Nick’s ass, which stilled him slightly. Leaning forward, he brought his left hand down and started swiping it down the muscled back in short frenzied bursts, the steel claw tips leaving pink trails here and there.

Nick’s noises were explosive but unsteady until Charlie planted his left forearm across his lower back, delicately setting the tips of the metal nails against one ass cheek, and let his right hand fall into place, lubed fingers brushing across and then into Nick’s bud.

A few thrusts then had Nick falling apart, grateful groans filling the room until he collapsed to one side and smiled breathlessly up at Charlie. There was a glint in the ocean-colored eyes as he wiped off his hand and pulled the steel rings off, dropping them loudly into their canister one by one, watching Nick shiver each time. He smirked as he moved that cylinder out to the front of the shelf and left it open.

Turning back to the bed, he patted Nick’s hip affectionately, folded the sex blanket out of the way and sank down to form the little spoon. As the bigger man curled around him, they both sighed happily. “Rest up; the day is just beginning,” he murmured.

Nick woke up from their nap first and carefully got up. He stared down at his drowsing beloved a long moment before he pulled on some pants and went looking for… sustenance. Two pieces of toast were not enough fuel for what had been promised to be a busy day. Charlie joined him at the tiny table not long after and they comfortably ate and chatted about inconsequentials. If there was a thrum of other energy underneath it, well… that was not entirely new.

Charlie didn’t object when Nick proposed some TV time on the couch but he did disappear in the direction of the loo before the show was over. When the episode ended and Nick shut off the screen, he heard his name called from the bedroom.

Stepping into the doorway, his breath caught in his throat. Charlie had done something new with his makeup; was that eyeshadow making the hollows around his eyes so smoky and alluring? Nick stumbled forward at a gesture.

He paused at the foot of the bed to take in other details. The special blanket was lined up with the headboard, clean and smooth once more. Charlie was sitting in the center of the pillows, leaning back against the flat wooden piece. His face was calm and maybe a little broody, the greys and blacks heightening the effect.

Nick felt the tingles rush up his spine when he noticed that both of the drummer’s hands, sitting loose at his sides, had two of those steel claws on the middle and ring fingers. Charlie noticed him noticing and bent the one hand under his gaze up and around, curling it suggestively.

Nick swallowed and flushed. Charlie smirked. “Come here, Nelson; stand in front of me.” He clambered up awkwardly, feet on either side of the sinewy legs.

Charlie tilted his head and just looked him up and down for a long beat. He felt something inside him swell and glow; it never got old, the wonder of being with this man. He pulled his lips in, struggling a bit to maintain the attitude he’d been fostering. He took in and released one slow breath.

Then he let his eyes fall to Nick’s groin and his predatory, pleased smile returned. It was just so gratifying seeing what was already blooming there again. Flicking his gaze back to Nick’s face, he raised both arms, slowly but surely, to cup the meaty glutes and let the steel tips dig in slightly. He watched Nick’s eyelids flutter.

He let his head drift forward and his mouth fall open. The cock in front of him was twitching and arching towards him; they met in the middle. Charlie gripped more firmly to take control of the contact. His tongue pressed solidly up against the underside and his lips settled around the head.

Nick was moaning and quivering. It wasn’t long before the dark head pulled back off, after only a handful of strokes and another handful of swirls intermixed, and issued new orders in a husky voice. “Open yourself up for me.”

Nick’s head flopped forward and he breathed out sharply. He blinked and then nodded, reaching over to gather some lube and bending slightly at the knees. Charlie’s hands had not left his ass and now spread the cheeks for him. Nick whined at the tiny pain points of the claw pricks but Charlie judged it was not too much yet.

One strong hand fell onto a narrow shoulder as the other hand reached around and got to work. Nick’s whole body was trembling by the time Charlie murmured at him to drop. The legs bent gratefully and the ass came within inches of Charlie’s lap, Nick hesitating there before the fingers digging into him brought them crashing together just to grind some friction out.

They scooted and shifted after a moment, finding the right angles for Nick to grab the top of the headboard and actually lower himself gradually onto Charlie’s shaft. Feeling everything fully engaged, Nick whined and panted there a moment. Charlie made encouraging noises and carefully kneaded the muscles of Nick’s lower back.

As Nick began to move, the lean hands stroked up and down, the claws engaging and bending away, again and again. Nick never knew when he’d get a new line of fire dancing across his back. He cried out every time and the cries got more frantic, as did the bucking of his pelvis. “Touch yourself,” Charlie barked; Nick immediately leaned back and rocked his hips and pulled with one still-slick hand. Soon he was arching back and forth, covering Charlie’s stomach in white.

The long hands settled confidently on his hips and brought him to a standstill as Nick panted and wheezed. He tried to shift, eyebrows quirking, mewling a question mark. But the hands kept him where he was and he felt the curls shake from side to side against his shoulder.

“Don’t worry about me, Nelson; I will take my pleasure whenever I want,” Charlie growled and Nick’s spine was tingling and uncoiling again. He focused on catching his breath and then unpeeling without spreading the mess. He threw a towel from the cabinet to Charlie as he fell onto that side of the bed.

This time the younger man was the big spoon and he spent some time tracing the pink lines on Nick’s back after they put the claws away and closed the canister. He hummed his question and Nick wiggled his satisfied answer. Charlie began to gently kiss over each one, making his beloved rumble contentedly.

After more kisses and some nuzzling, he tilted back to resettle his shoulder and suddenly laughed. Nick turned partially but Charlie stopped him with a hand on his arm. “I forgot I was wearing shadow and now it’s all over your back. Just stay like this and then we’ll get cleaned up,” he chuckled. Nick snorted and nodded.

Charlie went back to tracing designs on the freckled skin. “Is it weird to you how I’m going in and out of character?” he whispered. Nick shook his head. “Really?! It is to me…”

The large man started to turn but caught himself; instead he lifted one hand and wiggled his fingers until Charlie’s were entwined there. He sighed happily and brought their hands to his chest. “It’s all you, Char,” he said quietly. “More and more, when the One comes out to play, it’s just my beautiful… sexy… bad ass man… wearing fun makeup that’s been just for me.”

Charlie grunted thoughtfully. “And now it’s going to be for everyone…”

Nick grinned. “And now everyone will see the sex god I’m gonna marry!” Charlie struggled to pull his hand away so he could swat at him, exclaiming wordlessly. Nick just squeezed tighter and giggled.

Later in the shower, the deft hands drew another release from the rugby player’s willing body.

After some pasta and another episode of Nick’s show, Charlie reset the bed so they could lounge head to groin on the diagonal there. They moved slowly, hands and lips covering a lot of ground. Nick rolled on top and fully took the olive-toned cock in his mouth finally while the dark head fell back gasping.

The humming traveled up from Nick’s abs where Charlie’s hands were flailing, up through the defined planes of his chest, up through his greedy throat and down through his lips, tongue and teeth. It was a happy sound and it served as the basso profundo line to Charlie’s syncopated cries and moans. The banked lust was eventually spent in a crescendo they both vocalized.

The younger man’s arms came around to clasp the wide hips and pull his face into the crease of the leg again. His breath came hot and gusty there a few minutes and it, along with his much-admired hair, tickled all the right bits and bobs just there beside him.

So that when he turned his face and licked quickly, there was a delighted gasp and a shift which angled them just so. Charlie smiled and set about his self-appointed task with gusto.

Not long after, they were cozied up under the duvet. Nick’s nose was tracing the line of the other’s Adam’s apple as he leaned into the curve of the slender man’s arms. “It’s not super late but I am tuckered out. Is that enough for today, my love?”

Charlie chortled and shrugged. “No promises; we shall see what the dead of night brings.” He wiggled forcefully to bring them both into a better alignment with the pillow under his head. “But we’ve made a good start, haven’t we? You doing good?”

Nick shivered and nuzzled and giggled all at once. “Yeah.”

Chapter Text

Nick was dimly aware when Charlie pulled away from his side in the early morning light but he didn’t completely surface until he came back to bed, at which point he groaned and got up himself because bladders don’t care how good it feels to linger and cuddle.

Washing up at the sink, he noted the various signs yesterday left on his body. Small love bites were here and there, a couple of lines with tiny scabs already where the claws had dug deeper and… an impressive hickey on his inner thigh he vaguely remembered Charlie placing in the midst of their last frenzy. He poked it and smiled.

He was still thinking about it as he opened the door and caught himself up short. “Jesus, Charlie! What… oh…” He pulled in his lips and snorted out his nose. “Ummm… starting here then?”

Charlie’s smirk was threatening to be a semi-permanent feature lately and Nick wondered how he managed to still look like he was in charge when he was literally on his knees on a pillow inches away from Nick’s crotch. Nick’s next thought was a millisecond of gratitude to their teenaged selves who had instituted a thorough cleaning after each and every use of the loo… just in case. His last thought for several minutes was he better find somewhere to put his hands or he might tip Charlie’s plan off its axis so he reached up and dug his fingertips into the top of the bathroom doorframe.

Later by the stovetop, Nick poked at the brand new and equally large hickey on his belly roll. “Are you deliberately marking me up?” he asked with a tilt of his head. Charlie’s smirk was still there. “Oh… whoops… who am I talking to? Of course it’s deliberate.” The other man chuckled. Nick shook his head and they danced around the kitchen some more, assembling a hearty array of options to break their fast.

Refueled, they settled onto the couch to watch a movie but, less than halfway through, they were making out instead. Nick was on his knees between the narrow thighs, kissing his way down to Charlie’s collarbone, when he was pushed off slightly. Then one lean hand came up and wrapped itself around the back of Nick’s head in a way he had never felt before; first the palm and thumb landed and then each of the other fingers landing distinctly, one after another firmly clicking into a place of its own. It felt familiar and intensely RIGHT to Nick, like this specific hand was made to hold his specific skull. Charlie’s fingertips started to dig into the flesh there and Nick felt his legs go wobbly.

His head was pushed to one side and Charlie’s mouth found several spots under Nick’s ear that needed attention. He moaned and growled his desires, the fulfilled and the frustrated. Charlie’s hand tightened again and the growls become whimpers. Nick was jolted by the electricity arcing into his groin.

As Charlie’s other hand slipped into his pants and began to knead at his glutes, Nick felt himself start to melt. His arms were loose, his fingers flailing at the narrow hips, as his body was claimed between these three points: the strong hand holding his head still, the rigid arm blocking his torso from any significant movement and this demanding mouth on his neck.

As he swayed there - surrendering his desire to kiss and instead allowing himself to be kissed, nay consumed - his lips fell open and he just shuddered in place. He was vaguely aware of his loud breathing, his mewling and the way he kept saying “yours” with various levels of air behind it.

Finally Charlie’s mouth popped off him and the hand dropped from his head to join the other in his pants. The smaller man squeezed and pulled there a moment before barking the single word “up” at him and falling back. Nick shook his hair out of his face and crawled up to straddle the narrow waist.

Charlie’s hands dove back into Nick’s pants, roaming around until he pulled the front down and tucked it out of the way. Nick felt his erection, the whole package, straining forward above the fabric bunched there, on display. Charlie glanced down and smiled in that predatory way. Nick swallowed.

The lean hands claimed the wide ones and brought them straight to his groin. Nick’s head fell forward and he struggled to balance there and to understand what was wanted of him. His left hand was brought lower and encouraged to massage there. His right was brought to the shaft and intertwined with Charlie’s left… just so, just there.

Wordlessly they found what worked. Movements were slow and careful… until they weren’t. Charlie’s hand found Nick’s pre-come and rubbed it down and over the most sensitive spot. Both of them flitted hands to lips as often as necessary, adding moisture where it would help.

At one point, three of Nick’s fingers were deep in his beloved’s mouth and the brown eyes were heavy and fixed on watching them there. Then he bent and gasped and dropped his hand back to put that spit to good use. Soon he was rocking and howling and cumming without shame right where he was. Right where Charlie wanted him.

Finally catching his breath and having released the stretched pants back into position, Nick leaned down to kiss the plummy lips and then climbed off and went to clean up and drop them in the hamper.

Some time later, Charlie exited the toilet and found Nick standing and basking in the afternoon sun near the dining room table, still naked. A plate with crumbs on sat abandoned on the table and a cuppa was in his hand. The smaller man snuck up behind and wrapped his arms around the drowsy one. They hummed contentedly together.

“You doing okay? Nothing sore?” Charlie’s voice was liquid velvet. Nick chuffed softly; he nodded and set them swaying side to side, noting to himself how his fiancé was also naked now.

“You’re taking excellent care of me, love. You know… just how… just what to do to me.” He smiled and patted the arms around his waist with his free hand. “Bet you’ve never been quite so happy about my hair trigger, eh?” He chuckled and felt the curly head rub into his back.

Charlie pushed with his hips to accentuate the rocking they were doing and then cleared his throat. “Does that mean you’re ready to go again?” His voice was lilting, gently teasing, still velvet.

Nick bent forward with an amused snort. As the narrow arms fell away, he turned and caught his first glimpse of Charlie’s face since he’d come back into the common area. Setting his cup down, he bent his knees and drew them back together, matching pelvis to pelvis, navel to navel.

“Oh hello, eyeliner! So I guess that means you’re ready!” Their arms back around each other and their swaying resumed, all he got from the other man was a disingenuously demure look: a curled lip and a glance up through luscious eyelashes. Nick grinned. “Yeah…,” he leaned down and rubbed their noses together, “what did you have in mind?”

“Pick me up.” He lifted one leg and started to wrap it around the larger man. Nick bent further and grasped a narrow thigh in each hand, hoisting Charlie up easily and setting his groin onto his lower abdomen. The smaller man wiggled and brought himself even lower.

Nick bit his lower lip and shuffled his hands until he had the slender ass and hips balanced just so. Charlie began to grind them together and Nick’s head fell back. “Fuck, Char! You want me to…,” he panted, “umm, bedroom?” He whined at how quickly his lover could affect him like this.

The dark head shook and the hips continued to roll their burgeoning cocks together. “Wall,” his voice was huskier now, the velvet roughing up. “Your shoulders, wall.” Nick blinked and nodded; he took a few shaky steps back and leaned as directed. Then he shifted his grasp again, grateful for his hours at the gym training for this exact move.

“Don’t you…”

“No, I prepped already.”

“Jesus, Charlie. You are incredibly hot, do you know that?”

“Fuck me, Nelson. Bounce me on your dick.”

Nick sputtered and slid and sighed shakily. Charlie moaned and murmured and moved to take the last few inches decisively. Both heads bent back; both throats cried out. They gasped there a beat.

Then the dark head bent forward again and the lean hands dug into the broad shoulders. “Move, dammit. I want you pounding me, Nelson.” His brows shooting up, Nick gulped. Then he lifted and curled and crashed them together, picking up speed as he went, as he ripped the best noises out of his tiny beloved. Throughout, the brown and blue eyes found each other, again and again - wide, intense, loving.

Just when he thought his arms might give out, Nick felt himself cresting and he fell back hard against the wall, letting it wash over him, letting Charlie’s hips finish the job with small yet effective movements.

His legs trembling, he let his back slide down the wall until his butt reached the floor and he was cradling Charlie in his lap. He sank his forehead into the delicate collarbone and then bent up to kiss it sloppily. “That… was… amazing…” He rested his forehead again and noticed the younger man trembling in his arms. “Charlie, what do you need, dear?”

The curly head shook. “I’m okay,” he panted. “Yes, amazing… for me too… I just… wanna… wait. I’m good.”

“Fuck, you can say that again,” Nick grunted and tilted to kiss and chew on those deliciously full lips. “So… fucking… good…”

Charlie hummed and vibrated and gradually they slowed their heartbeats together. The smaller man gingerly stood and stepped back and held out his hand to draw Nick into the bathroom where he gently cleaned them both up with warm washcloths. Then they crawled under the duvet and drowsed all tangled together for some timeless time.

Late that night after dinner and some parallel screen time catching up on their socials, Nick was stretched out flat on the sex blanket, wrists cuffed and loose above his head. He was aroused and laughing as Charlie tickled and toyed with him from where he sat criss cross between the muscled thighs. Music was playing from the phone and speaker on the side table. Brown eyes were dancing as he squirmed and arched.

It seemed to go on forever, Charlie stretching the moments into a chain of delighted gasps and breathless requests. Finally one slick hand settled into his own lap and Nick knew they were leaving suspense and heading towards satisfaction.

His breath hitched when the slender frame sat up and slotted into place. Charlie on his knees with both hands bringing their cocks together was a vision he wanted imprinted on the back of his eyelids. Pausing only to add more lube, Charlie bumped their hips together until he was happy with the angle and smiled rakishly down into his man’s stare.

Then he tilted back slightly, closed his eyes and chased that fulfillment for the both of them. Every nerve in Nick’s body felt alive and crackling yet content and happy. He was literally in good hands and he knew it. Being loved by this human was everything. He pulled on the cuffs for extra frisson, bit his lip and enjoyed what, for him, was a long ride to the top.

Chapter Text

The light in the room was that sepia color that washed everything out when Nick woke with a gasp. His head wove from side to side as he tried to shake the sleep from his brain. His whole body was bending around the sensations in his cock.

As his hands trembled and waved into place, he half sat up, taking a firm hold of the black curls bobbing in his now-lap. “FUCK, CHARLIE!” He groaned deep in his windpipe and then let his fingers relax, just feeling the hair brush over him repeatedly and the mouth suctioning him deep already.

His arms shot up to cover his own face as he heard himself squeal. “Fuck, Char,” he then wheezed softly. “Way… to use that… morning wood…” He arched his back, his arms slamming into the mattress on either side of his own hips. He heard the man bent up between his legs slurp and laugh at the same time and he arched again.

He saw stars.

As he returned somewhat to alertness, he noticed the other’s energy had not dimmed one iota. Charlie was humming and rubbing his face up Nick’s body until he buried it in the warm neck, bringing his weight fully down on him from shoulder to toes.

“Hi,” Nick panted at him. Charlie giggled and nuzzled some more. “Look, I loved that but you have to let me up.” The intensity of that desperate orgasm was partially due to a bladder needing relief, as the younger man probably well knew; in any case, he sighed and nodded and rolled off. Nick dropped a quick kiss on his forehead and dashed to the loo.

Sneaking back into bed soon after, he was able to curl around his fiancé’s drowsing form; he smiled as he realized his reality was even better than whatever dream that erection had been fueling. He laid his cheek against Charlie’s curls and fell back asleep.

When he awoke again, he was alone and splayed out across the mattress. Music was playing softly in the other room. He stretched and felt the thrum of the last few days moving through his muscles.

He had to hand it to his lover; even now, nothing was sore. He shook his head, marveling again at this plan which had already been so varied and… effective. He felt… sated… deep inside. Desire was still there… but just glowing softly, ready to respond… not demanding.

He still wondered at the shift he felt, the dynamic of having Charlie initiate and lead every single thing; he raised his hands and smiled at his rainbow fingernails. His eyes unfocused again as he pondered what it did to his nerve endings when he was ordered about.

He thought back to their first mentions of power differential sex, Charlie asking for his help on that beach. The journeys they had undergone, circumventing shame spirals. How good it had felt to take care of his beloved, to make and then implement a plan.

The art museum, the hiking trip, that one Valentine’s Day, that crucial weekend in his dorm room. All the incremental steps they had walked together, no matter who was ostensibly in charge.

It was, he realized, like every other part of their partnership. The give and take, ebb and flow. They both got to be “the strong one”. They both got to fall apart; they just tried not to do that part on the same day.

And they each brought their own energy to the power play. Charlie was way more strict when he went dom. Nick shivered, remembering past sessions when he’d been “punished”. Yep, he decided, Charlie was still just really good at literally everything. He grinned and rolled out of bed.

After breakfast, he had reason to wonder if Charlie had also been reviewing memories of their first couple of years together. This was familiar: Charlie in Nick’s lap, his legs on either side. Nick leaning back on pillows against the headboard. Endless kisses. Roaming hands.

There’d been a lot more clothes back then, he thought vaguely. And a lot more insecurities. Damn, it was hot the way Charlie suddenly climbed off him and repositioned him on the mattress. He watched the strong hands shift his wrist so Nick’s torso was supported easily on his two arms angled behind him. He glanced up and caught his breath as Charlie turned and settled into place, the slender back against his chest, noting how they were both now facing the full-length mirror on the closet door.

Their eyes locked in the reflection. Nick wasn’t sure how long that moment lasted but he had to remind his lungs to draw in air.

One narrow arm lifted and circled around to pull the light head down into the curve of a neck. Nick hummed his enthusiasm into Charlie’s skin as they settled together.

Leaning back on his arms the way he’d been placed, Nick had limited options. One at a time, he could lift one hand to pull the dark head to one side or to press the narrow hips back until his burgeoning cock was nestled firmly between Charlie’s cheeks. But mostly he just leaned and reached every inch of skin he could, dragging lips and teeth and tongue over them until they were both breathing heavily.

Charlie’s hands had no such limitations. One arm had bent and ducked between their torsos at first, before Nick insisted on closing that gap; it had been those skillful fingers which made him bloom and lust for more friction.

They were also rubbing at Nick’s thighs, with the occasional dig of fingernails into flesh. And they would roam over Charlie himself, with Nick watching, heavy-lidded, through the glass. Seeing the smaller man rub and twist the dark nipples while feeling the effects of it, the slender frame trembling against his own chest - it was close to an out of body experience.

He groaned when Charlie rolled away but the smirk and then shushing he got just made him quiver more. He groaned again as the lean hand collected lube and applied it between the pale cheeks. How could one skinny man lying belly down on a bed next to him wield so much damn power over his nervous system?!

Nick was transfixed watching Charlie’s face pulse and twitch as he opened himself up. He felt completely frozen when Charlie jumped up and came back in front of him the same direction as before, legs planted wide; their eyes found each other again in the mirror. Nick’s mouth fell open as Charlie’s pelvis descended but otherwise he was motionless, hypnotized by the sea-colored eyes.

At this angle, Nick could see exactly when Charlie bottomed out, as well as feel it. The reflection made it seem like he was watching a movie, doubling every sensation. Tiny muscles were bunching here and there, nerves randomly firing all over his body, as he noticed the olive-toned cock twitching.

But when it set to bouncing, Nick was flooded even more, each drag of Charlie’s channel up and down his shaft its own roller coaster ride, waves of pleasure washing over him as he watched and felt and cried out and came apart.

A little while later, he’d recovered enough to notice they were now side by side flat on their backs, both panting. “Wow,” he murmured. “Wo-o-oow.”

Charlie smirked and rolled into his side, throwing one arm over his sternum. “For the record, I do love your hair trigger.” They both giggled. “And your refractory period.” He whispered that one as he burrowed into Nick’s neck and nibbled on his earlobe.

“OI! Give us a little bit longer before you start me up again please! It’s not THAT short!” Charlie fell back and then snuggled in as they both laughed. Nick turned and rubbed his jaw into the dark curls. He huffed and planted a kiss there. “God, I love you.” They both smiled and closed their eyes for a while.

After lunch, Charlie drew them a warm bath with bubbles, candles on the counter and a single beer to share, poured into two short glasses. When Nick tilted his head, the younger man had laughed. “Alcohol interferes with your ability to get it up; NOT what I’m going for today. You can have two with lunch tomorrow before we head out.” Nick pulled in his lips and nodded, his spine tingling a little bit.

They sank into the water, squeezed into opposite ends and facing each other, feet pressed into the spaces between bellies and the walls. They tinked their glasses together and relaxed as best they could in their regular-sized bathtub.

When they’d finished their drinks and the chit chat which flowed so easily back and forth, Charlie slowly stood up, spun around and lowered himself into Nick’s arms. Now both sets of legs had somewhat more room.

Nick kissed and rubbed at the shoulders and back in front of him, Charlie bending into it with delighted noises. Strong fingers dug into knots and caressed sharp shoulder blades. Warm hands encircled the narrow frame and ran down svelte, toned arms.

Nick paused and held his breath a moment. Charlie pushed back against him and hummed contentedly. Thick thumbs gently traced lattice scars between wrist and elbow. The curly head fell back easily and bent towards Nick’s face with a peaceful exhalation.

“And yet you’re not the one who likes pain, I am… or the edges of it anyway,” Nick murmured into his temple.

“No,” Charlie agreed. “It was never about the pain per se, when I was cutting.” He bent his neck as the larger man lipped his way down and around, both sets of hands falling into Charlie’s lap unheeded. One slender arm came back out of the water and languidly dripped all over Nick’s shoulder before pulling his head closer.

Finally Nick sat back and they both caught their breath, happy to let the water cool around them as they tamped down their desire for now. He let his head loll back, stretching his neck. As he shifted forward again, his hands found new spots to massage on Charlie’s back.

“I remember our first bath together,” he said through a fond smile. Charlie was reduced to wordless responses again, focused on the pleasure of another backrub. “You didn’t believe me when I said I wanted your ass.” He dropped one hand to cup the part in question, arm squeezing between their bodies, and the other into the water in front of Charlie, splashing a tiny wave into his fiancé’s chest.

Charlie sputtered and shouted at him, pulling them apart. Nick laughed as the younger man contemplated retaliating before deciding it was too much mess. “I hope you know by now how ridiculous that was,” Nick enveloped the smaller man once more and pressed a kiss onto his cheek, where he could feel the edge of Charlie’s smile.

The other man just nodded and they leaned back together with a sigh. They drowsed there until they were pruny and cold; then they rushed through drying off and snuggled naked in bed a while longer to warm up.

After dinner, Charlie spread the sex blanket out again and patted it, gesturing for Nick to disrobe and sit on the edge of the bed. Tingles running up and down his back, he did so.

Charlie held up a single index finger and ducked into the bathroom. A minute later, he emerged with a rough, skinny line of black greasepaint stretching across his face, running from the top of one ear to the other, under the eyes and across the bridge of his nose. Nick’s tingles intensified and his breathing sped up. Charlie, predictably, smirked.

He went to the closet by the drum kit and pulled out a small, plain cardboard box. He stalked over and stood in front of his fiancé, crossing his arms so the box dangled near one of his elbows. He glared down.

Nick swallowed.

“You’ve been very good so far,” Charlie growled and unlocked his arms to shove the box in Nick’s face. “I got you something.”

Opening the lid, the brown eyes saw a jumble of black leather and steel; they widened and he swallowed again as he lifted the silicone barbell shape it was all connected to out of the box. Hips and spine on fire, he dropped the container on the floor and held the pony bit and reins in both hands as he looked up at the One in Black.

Who was grinning his predatory grin at him, which just heightened the flames licking inside his skin. The lean hands came up to cup under the wide ones and he stepped forward to jerk his chin down and rumble, “You’ll wear that tonight but not tomorrow.”

Nick nodded, relieved and reminded of how smart and considerate his lover was, why he could trust him so much. Of course Charlie wouldn’t expect him to put a new scene right into public like that. He had flutters in his belly but the flames were… louder…

The dark-haired man stepped right up into Nick’s space now, forcing him to transfer the jumble to just one hand as they fell apart to his sides. Nick felt fingers slide into the hair at the nape of his neck and pull his head back. He realized he’d closed his eyes reflexively and he forced them open again.

His face was pointed up, his chin close to the soft, pale abdomen he loved so much. He blinked and let his eyes travel up to a spot just near Charlie’s nose. He pulled in his lips.

His head was yanked slightly and his eyes leapt to make contact with Charlie’s after all. He saw their steely glint but he also saw the way the corner of his mouth twitched a little bit. Oh good, he was pleased; Nick felt warm all over.

“I’m going to show you off tomorrow,” came the dark voice. “All you have to do,” bending Nick’s head one way and then the other, “is stand there and look pretty.” The other hand came up to rub at Nick’s cheek. “This scruff will have to go; we’ll take care of that in the morning.” As that hand pulled away again, Nick dared to close the gap and brush the offending scruff against the flat belly.

In a snap, the hand was back and pushing at his face as the other man dropped his head to gnash his teeth an inch from the wide brown eyes. They both froze there a beat.

Then the curly head was shaking and the plummy mouth was tutting at him. “Naughty, naughty.” Nick pulled his lips in again and lowered his eyes demurely. “What am I going to do with you, I swear…” The hand in his hair was tightening and loosening repeatedly now. The other hand had cupped his jaw but the thumb began to arc towards Nick’s mouth.

It pushed at his lips, once… twice… and then bent, wormed and shoved its way in. Nick gasped and found it fully buried inside in an instant, his lips catching on before his brain could, applying pressure and suction automatically. The warmth coalesced in his groin as he whimpered around the digit.

Charlie’s face was still very close; now he leaned to one side to whisper, “I have decided to punish you for that… later…” Nick shivered at the hot air on his earlobe. “Right now, it is time for you to do your duty.”

With that, the younger man stood up straight and pressed his arms tight to his sides. Nick chased after the thumb as it pulled out and so he followed that momentum forward until his tongue was lapping at Charlie’s half-rigid cock.

His hands were in his lap now as he bent to his task, one of the steel parts of the reins digging into his hip. He moaned around the shaft growing stiffer in his throat.

Long before he was ready to let go, he was roughly pushed off and back, the bulb making an obscenely wet sound as it popped out of his eager lips. Panting, he gratefully moved the gag to his side on the mattress, dropping it there and rubbing at what felt like a dent it had caused in his flank.

Suddenly he was being pushed over to lay down on his side, one hand taking over the rubbing of that mark. The other man was hissing as he examined it; once he confirmed it was returning to normal with no damage, he nodded to himself and then, glancing sideways at the confused look on Nick’s face, licked it with a firm wide swipe.

Nick felt the tingles concentrate there, the ache of where he’d let the steel ring bite into him synthesizing with the cool air touching everywhere the One had licked him. He moaned.

“Is that better, bubby?” The dark voice was raspy now. Nick tilted up to look at him again. One knobby finger rubbed the spot and then pushed at it a moment and Nick’s head fell back; he moaned again. “No more accidents. Only pain I choose to give you; got it?” Nick nodded and writhed slightly.

“Speaking of which, roll onto your stomach,” the dark-haired man barked. Nick scurried to obey and was quickly gasping as Charlie’s mouth latched onto his ass intense enough to leave a mark. Then another one, higher up. Then one more on his lower back as a hand rubbed and soothed the first hickey of today.

Nick’s muscles were undulating wildly as the other man straightened up again and then came around the bed to kneel by his head. His hair was tugged until he tilted up far enough to accept the throbbing cock back in his mouth; it pumped there a few minutes and he felt it push and pull him just enough for the mattress to give him a hint of friction on his own. He closed his eyes and groaned around the turgid flesh.

A few minutes later, his eyes snapped open to find Charlie rocking back to sit on his heels and take himself in hand. Nick moaned, his eyes transfixed on that gorgeous cock. He just wanted all of Charlie… always.

As the other man stood up and walked around the bed to the cabinet and he could hear the lube dispenser, he thought he might get his wish tonight. Next he knew, skillful fingers were easing into his back door and he leaned into it.

He was enjoying it so much, still not sure if it was prep or the main event, that he whined as the sensations ceased. But a minute later, he was being encouraged by sure hands to struggle up to his knees and elbows and take his beloved’s cock through his lips again. He swayed there, eager to please and increasingly desperate for the ascent on the horizon.

He heard Charlie moaning as his tongue swirled and it sent new waves of electricity down his back. The delicious cock was practically vibrating when it was removed this time. Then that bit, god that bit! was being shoved into his mouth.

His noises became deeper, more feral, as the strap was fastened. He writhed as the other man walked around and climbed up behind him. He could feel the reins gathered as it drew his head up and his back bent in response. One hand settled there to push him into the proper angle, then disappeared. He heard the pump bottle again.

A few beats later, the reins were jerked sharply back as he felt his hip grasped and the oh so welcome bump of a bulbous head right where he craved it. His sounds intensified as they slid together inch by inch. He panted around the gag which was driving every molecule of tension and need into his groin.

As soon as he felt the other pelvis against his cheeks, he wiggled his consent and the smaller man began to move in earnest. Nick could sense the way Charlie was using the reins to create the torque he needed to crash them together. He braced his shoulders and dropped his head so it created the proper pull. The increased pressure in his mouth was driving him wild.

As his peak came into view, he felt his cock engorging even more and he bent in between the other man’s thrusts to try to touch it. His balls were tightening, his toes were curling and he was so close.

He heard the dark voice chanting his name and then yelling incoherently, just as he got a single fingertip crooked around his own glans. And then he was over the edge, being warmed inside and out by his fiancé’s love, spilling and chewing and groaning.

He lost some time then, wandering in the white behind his eyes. When he remembered who he was, he found himself wrapped in Charlie’s arms under the duvet. No bit, no blanket. Just them.

He shook his head. Damn, that was intense. His body liked this gag a lot. Interesting.

He rolled over and cupped the strong jaw in his hand, noticing Charlie had cleaned up his own face too. They smiled sleepily at each other. Nick leaned in and kissed him deeply, slowly.

Then he rested their foreheads together. “Hmmmm. Pony bit is a firm yes,” he murmured. Charlie’s smile was patient, soft. “Saddle and hooves still in the No column.” The dark head nodded slightly. Nick licked his lips.

“Tail has moved to Maybe…” The blue eyes flicked up to meet his. “Prep with a toy might be fun?” Both sets of eyes twinkled and they kissed again, satiated and serene, always exploring together, negotiating one tiny choice at a time.

Chapter Text

“Wake up, Nelson.” Nick was on his belly when he jerked his head up, going from deep sleep to hazy awareness in an instant, dreams vanishing in a puff. There was a hand kneading his glutes so he rolled into the arm to nuzzle at Charlie’s thigh where he was sitting criss cross on the mattress. “Hmmmm, yes. Now get up and go to the loo. I have plans.”

Nick pulled himself up to his hands and knees and tried to gauge Charlie’s intentions but his mind was still foggy. Suddenly the hand on his ass rose and fell with a loud crack. Nick’s mouth gaped open and his nerve endings sizzled. He felt more alert already as adrenaline coursed through him.

Now he could see the fierceness on his lover’s face and, before he could really think about it, he had hopped up to obey. He felt his body twinging and starting to tremble as he washed up in the bathroom.

As he approached the bed again, he attempted to anticipate the next order but the blue eyes just regarded him and he stumbled to a halt at the footboard. The sex blanket was once again spread out.

“Do… do you…,” he caught himself. He cleared his throat and fell into their parade rest position, trying to wordlessly express his eagerness to please. When the generous lips curled slightly, he felt weak-kneed.

“Hands and knees, Nelson,” was low and raspy, accompanied by a wave of one hand towards the headboard. Nick licked his lips and complied.

Charlie stood and walked around to the cabinet. He gathered some lube and rubbed his fingers together. Nick felt that tension-relaxation paradox pulling inside his pelvis.

The drummer’s other hand came up to caress Nick’s jaw. He moaned and pushed into it when the fingers turned and scratched at his stubble. “Tsk tsk tsk,” the dark head was shaking and Nick dropped his chin, tucking it into his chest without losing contact with the hand petting him.

“You were very rude last night, Nelson.” Nick’s toes curled and he whimpered. “But I have to thank you,” the other man almost purred and Nick felt stirrings of hope. “You gave me reasons,” the fingers were dragging their nails down his neck and across his shoulders now, “for what I wanted to do to you anyway.”

That hand gripped the base of his head and suddenly he felt the other hand, covered in slick, rubbing at his back door. Nick gasped and lurched and was stilled, then brought back to his position, by both hands.

Caressing every part of the already writhing body in front of him, Charlie began to chuckle deep in his chest. “Look at you, love. Already on fire, aren’t you?” Nick nodded desperately, his rear end jutting into the air where Charlie’s hand had just pulled away from it. “So so eager… So… so naughty…” Nick’s head slammed down against the bed as he bent his spine the other way, reacting in panic to those words.

Three loud quick cracks in succession had him groaning, almost crying. He undulated there, alone on the bed, the air vibrating around his stinging ass.

He heard the pump of the lube bottle again and then one fingertip was pushing at him. He drew in a breath between clenched teeth; he’s a little tender. More lube was swirled there around the tip, which continued pushing… so… slowly…

The edge of pain was like a whipcord of light in a dark tunnel. It bent and snapped inside him, igniting nerve endings near and far. He groaned with his full throat.

The hands disappeared and he heard the lube pump again and then again. Then the sound of skin on skin but still no touch.

Nick raised his head in time to see one long lean hand drop to Charlie’s own ripened cock and feel the other one return to breaching him. His breath was ragged, his lungs desperate.

The two hands flexed and stretched. One pulling, one pushing. Nick kept his face turned so he could watch. He even dared a glance up but quickly returned his gaze to the dance in his lover’s lap, unable to maintain eye contact with the burning orbs above him.

He heard the other man pull noises out of both of them until he lost himself in the gasping. He was building on the one hand alone, his own cock left dangling and angry. He whined and looked up again.

The glare he got made him hang his head in a semblance of shame. His nerve endings whirred all over. The hand probing his ass got even more demanding.

“Look. At. What. You’ve. Done.” The words came forced through concrete. The two hands a blur. Nick stared back through his eyelashes, mouth open, hungry for whatever sensations he was granted. The narrow hips came closer and the room got louder.

He felt wet on his face and he bent and cried out and pushed back onto strong fingers hitting his prostate and he came and he came and he collapsed without permission, jangly and quivering.

His system still just over the peak, he felt the tip of Charlie’s cock rubbing its spill against his lips and he moaned and took it into his mouth, riding new waves of pleasure from the small mercy.

He licked and sucked and cleaned it up as best he could, with most of his muscles temporarily locked up. One hand patted his hip as the groin pulled away. He whimpered as the dark head dropped down to his ear.

“Good job.” He felt his entire body unfold at those two words. Then the bee-stung lips were latched onto his neck just to the side of the hollow in his throat and he was being pressed back into the mattress as a new mark was laid into his flesh. His breath was loose and rattley.

“Sleep.” The tongue on his earlobe was a tiny flicker as his eyes closed. Just before he slipped under, he heard the shower turn on.

When he stumbled into the kitchen in just his robe, he found Charlie in white cotton pants finishing up at the table with a clean plate sitting across from him. The younger man gestured at the empty chair and Nick gratefully slumped.

Charlie rose and, a few minutes later, dropped toast on his plate and placed a mug of tea next to it. He stepped in and kissed Nick’s forehead before turning and tidying up as the larger man started to eat. Then he plopped more toast onto the now-empty plate and refilled the mug before disappearing in the direction of the toilet.

Nick felt the evidence of Charlie’s love and devotion in every cell of his body. He was smiling softly to himself when he suddenly remembered that today was the big day and then butterflies boiled in his guts. He took several deep breaths and wiggled in his seat to settle them. He took lessons from their life together and methodically worked his way through the simple breakfast.

But Nick literally stopped chewing when Charlie walked out of the bedroom. The black greasepaint was back and bigger than ever. And he’d done something new with his hair, the curls all pushed up into a soft wall of jet. It looked amazing yet Nick still longed to run his fingers into the tumbled mound on top and tease each loop back into its usual place.

The hair and the makeup together made almost a perfect oval of black this time. The demarcation began at the top of each ear, where the sideburns touched. It curved down across the cheeks and black covered most of the nose, leaving only the area around the nostrils. It was very alien; Nick had a hard time recognizing his fiancé under all that. Maybe that was the point…

“Your turn,” came the dark voice and Nick jumped up, swallowed and abandoned his plate on the table to follow the other man into the bathroom.

He was sat down on the closed toilet lid and a steamy washcloth was laid upon his whole face. He tried to relax and just breathe but one of his legs wouldn’t stop jiggling. After a minute of that, he felt a hand on the back of his neck squeezing just so. He felt muscles sliding loose he’d never noticed before.

The washcloth was removed and his face rubbed with something that smelled faintly of citrus. Then a small rough pad was being rubbed all over his cheeks, jaw, chin, neck…

Nick stretched and sighed back into place when that step was done. Next was something oily and a little musky rubbed into all the stubble. He watched Charlie’s eyes as they peeked through this alien mask he’d created out of makeup; to have him so close yet concentrating on this task added to the surreal feeling.

Charlie left him for a few minutes, maybe while the oil soaked in, and then came back to apply their favorite shaving cream. This was starting to be familiar territory; they’d helped each other with these steps before now. It still felt amazing to be pampered like this though…

Then finally the razor came out and Nick was careful to hold still, to move only when prodded by the skillful hands of his beloved. He was tilted and turned until finally the dark head nodded.

A cool washcloth was procured and he was cleaned off thoroughly. Finally another treatment smelling of citrus. Nick rolled his neck and smiled up at the younger man.

Who leaned over and turned on the shower while facing away from the faucet, stepped into the doorway and pointed at the tub. Nick nodded and, hanging up his robe, climbed over the edge. He checked the temperature, turned under the spray and made eye contact, silently awaiting further instructions.

The smile he received in return made the butterflies dissolve completely. He was just there to look pretty; he had nothing to worry about today.

“Wash. I’ll be back; wait for me with the water still going.” Nick nodded and picked up the soap. Charlie disappeared past the door but didn’t close it.

When he came back, Nick was shampooed, rinsed and just letting the hot water hit his back while he noticed every last nerve ending in his torso. When the slender man with the dramatic face paint pushed the curtain halfway open, leaned on the wall and looked at him in that sultry way, many of those nerve endings woke back up.

That smile, that pleased smile… It woke up more.

Nick didn’t know what to do with his hands anymore. They fluttered up and down until the other man took pity on him. “Play with yourself.” Nick’s sharp intake of air did not delay his actions at all; one hand shot to his cock and the other came up to steady him, lying flat against the shower side.

He stroked and his head lolled and he preened. Muscles shifting under the intense observation. He turned to the side and leaned the whole arm next to the hand. He looked back over his other shoulder and saw that smile. He bent, fingers making careful movements. So much stimulation these last few days, so many releases…

The dark voice was closer. “Use the soap.” He followed directions without thought. He felt the slip, the glide. His lips found the back of his own hand against the wall as he bent and pushed and pulsed around this one centre of the cosmos. He teetered.

“Cum for me.” He tipped.

His whole body shuddered into the side of the shower and he sank to his haunches. His hands gentled and then washed it all clean again. His brain was an empty blue sky.

Some time later, he was sitting on a towel, still naked, at the table eating a hearty sandwich and working his way through the first of his beers. Charlie cleared the table for him again and handed him the second beer before beckoning him into the bedroom.

There, he pointed at a rainbow bikini brief swimsuit laying on the bed and folded his arms while he watched him put it on. Nick swallowed under the scrutiny and reflexively stood in parade rest. The curly head nodded, satisfied, and he breathed out.

Charlie gestured at the beer and Nick picked it up again and took a swig while the other man rummaged in a box in the far closet. He was holding a wide black marker as he returned and motioned Nick to drop his arms.

The brown eyes watched in the mirror, bemused, as Charlie wrote across his smooth stomach, just under the broad pecs lightly covered in russet hairs. As the smaller man walked around behind him, he could make out it said HANDS OFF.

“Look but don’t touch,” the gentle voice murmured as he felt the marker going across his back. Nick took another pull of his beer and sighed happily. His fiancé took such good care of him.

Next came sunscreen: lotion all over his face, a different one all over Charlie’s shoulders, arms and legs, then a spray all over Nick… everywhere… The matte effect on the younger man was very noticeable next to Nick’s gleaming body. He stood there awkwardly while it dried to a slightly less shiny effect.

In the meantime, he got to enjoy watching Charlie trade his white cotton pants for black booty shorts and then wiggle into his corset. A faint thrum of desire went through his bloodstream but it was pleasant instead of overwhelming.

But when Charlie pulled knee-high black combat boots out of the far closet, sat on the bed to pull them on and start lacing them up, Nick’s breath caught in his throat and the dial on his desire ticked up a notch, a slightly painful sensation by now.

“What… where… when did you get THOSE?!” he stuttered. The dark-haired man smirked up at him.

“I borrowed them from Scarlet; they’ll pinch a little but it’s worth it for a few hours of discomfort. Why?” One striking eyebrow arched even higher. “Are they doing it for you? Do I need to push the schedule for one more orgasm?”

Nick stepped back waving his arms criss cross in front of his crotch. “Wait! No! No!” Charlie giggled and bent to the other boot. “Oh. Um.” The larger man hung his head bashfully. “They just… you look really great.”

Standing, Charlie drew them both to the mirrored closet and pulled out gold flip flops, throwing them on the floor for Nick to step into. “Yours aren’t very practical either but our aesthetic is unparalleled!” They grinned at each other. “Oh shit, I almost forgot.”

Charlie hustled into the loo, leaving Nick to regard his reflection a minute. He twisted and noted each of the hickeys laid into him over the past few days. The oldest, on his inner thigh, was already yellow. The one on his belly was more greenish while the ones climbing up his back out of the swimsuit were still purpley blue. The one at his throat was red and a little raw looking.

His fiancé returned with a small cosmetics case; as he applied gold highlights to Nick’s brows and cheeks, the brown eyes watched his every move above a fond smile. Holding up a stick of the darkest red lipstick the older man had ever seen and turning to apply it to Nick, Charlie saw the look and blinked. “Wot?”

Nick smirked. “You… have made it… very obvious how many days you just spent fucking my brains out.” Charlie’s mouth twitched but he shook his head. Nick leaned forward and back, waving his hands over the various love bites. “God damn show off.”

Charlie laughed and turned back to his task with the lipstick. “Oh. Well, yes. I told you I had a plan.”

As soon as he was allowed, Nick shook his head incredulously. “You really thought of everything.”

“I mean, I tried to, yeah.” Charlie stepped back and let Nick take in the final impact of their look, both sets of eyes finding the mirror again.

Nick could barely breathe. “I love your brain.” They grinned at each other. And then they heard someone knocking on the door.

Charlie trailed his fingers over Nick’s chest. “Time to go, love.” Nick grabbed that hand in his own and brought the tip of his nose to touch the back of it, mindful of the makeup. Glancing up, he smiled confidently and nodded.

Chapter Text

Charlie threw open the door and Nick saw his bandmate Rocky there, in a long pink caftan with his dark skin nearly covered in pastel paints and plastic flowers seemingly glued all over his bald head. Charlie and Rocky both squealed and waved their arms at the other person’s Pride costume. When Charlie turned to pick up a small canvas tote and drop his keys and wallet into it, Rocky saw Nick and fanned himself dramatically.

Nick pulled in his lips and shuffled from one foot to the other. “Hey, Rocky. You look amazing.”

“It’s Peaseblossom today, darling. Now come on, I have the van full of fairies but we saved a little corner for you two!” Sure enough, the back doors of the cargo van opened to reveal three more men in gorgeous costumes, including one with ginormous wings, crammed into the space normally full of the band’s instruments.

Everyone oohed and aahed over each other as the couple climbed in and sat on the metal floor. Charlie turned to Nick as the engine started and showed him the other contents of the tote. “There’s water and granola bars and more sunscreen. This will be hidden on the float next to us. One of your jobs will be to keep track of it today.” Nick nodded. “Otherwise I want you to just focus on me. Whenever you feel overwhelmed or not sure what to do, just look at me and stand in parade rest. Ok?”

Nick nodded again and grinned at his fiancé as they bounced along. He took the near hand in his and intertwined their fingers, looking again at their contrasting manicures and then using his free hand to trace up Charlie’s wrist and over his scars. He looked up then and found the blue eyes inside the mask.

“I know it’s a cliche today but,” he swallowed, “I am so proud of you and so proud to be yours.” The smile he got in answer was all wonder and ardor, all teeth and light. They were interrupted after a few moments by teasing from the other men. Both dropped their heads and then laughed along.

Rocky found parking and they all scurried over to the staging area. The fairies waved goodbye and headed right to find their contingent. Charlie lead Nick left and they found the kink float, which looked like a giant black amplifier with a little stage on either side. Charlie consulted with a big bear leather daddy and then dragged his fiancé around to the other side before tucking the tote into a space which would be hidden from the crowd.

Nick felt the anticipation ratcheting up inside, like a buzzing just under his skin. But no butterflies, no fear. He just had to lock his eyeballs onto Charlie, whatever he was doing, and the empty blue sky from earlier, after the shower, opened up in his mind again.

There had been a few people stopping by to talk quietly with the other man or wish them both luck. Nick just smiled and waved and waited.

It didn’t take too long before the engine started up and the whole float vibrated under their feet. There was a chapter of Dykes on Bikes in front of them; once they started their motorcycles, the noise was intense.

Charlie winced and turned towards Nick. “I should have brought earplugs.” Nick mimed not being able to hear him and Charlie laughed. Then he pulled his lips sideways a moment. “Be right back.” He turned and went to the back of the float, disappearing around the looming amp.

Nick looked ahead on the route, seeing they’d be traveling through shade and sun in this section. The day was warm and bright. It was nice to be outside again; he smiled as he rubbed at his neck.

Charlie returned just in time to see the float in front of the Dykes get moving. He held out two hot pink foam earplugs with a big grin and Nick shook his head affectionately as he took and applied them. Charlie took his free hand and gave the back of it a chaste kiss. Nick pulled in his lips and nodded, eyes shining bright.

Then Charlie turned and stepped two long strides away where there was a higher platform against the backdrop of the amp. He climbed up and looked around as their float lurched into motion. Nick watched as he spread his feet, found his stance and then just… became the One in Black.

It was breathtaking. He was magnificent. Nick could not believe how fortunate he was.

To love and be loved by this man. To be witnessing his growth and evolution, his courage again and again. To have the rest of their lives to see this journey take shape.

Music started up, as though it was emanating from all around them. Loud hard-driving instrumentals Nick didn’t recognize. He swayed in place, grateful for Charlie’s resourcefulness obtaining the noise protection, even though it didn’t entirely blanket the effect. This was still going to be a lot; good thing it was only a few hours before they wound up back here and could disembark.

The parade was… a blur. Noise. Cheering and wolf whistles and music and motorcycles. A wash of people on both sides of the route, a cacophony of color and movement. Riding the float like a ship as it lurched around corners and through the changing light.

Nick mostly stood with his back to the crowd, eyes on his beloved. Who gyrated and pranced and flirted with the onlookers in the most compelling, commanding way. Nick felt faint stirrings in his groin but the last few days were effective and he was not embarrassed by a display of his desires.

As the float turned the last corner and went past the barriers designed to define “backstage”, Charlie leapt down and wrapped Nick in a long hug, pulling him in and locking his chin over the broad shoulder. As the music was turned off, Nick laughed and swayed and held him, feeling the nerves catching up and working their way through the slender frame.

“You were amazing. That was incredible,” he murmured. He rubbed the sides of their heads together, still trying not to muss the other man’s work on their faces. Charlie stepped back and grinned at him; they lost a minute or two just staring into each other’s eyes.

Some of their friends from the Planning Committee came whooping down the street and broke them out of their reverie. They turned and waved and yelled back as they went past. Charlie pulled out the tote and opened a water bottle; he passed the bag to Nick and they both emptied a container rehydrating and removed their earplugs. Nick started munching on a granola bar as Charlie suggested they go wander the main Pride grounds for a bit; he nodded and they walked around to the stairs, waving at the others as they all went on to their next activity or assignment.

Charlie took his hand and Nick slung the tote straps over his other arm; they threaded their way through the back of the crowd pushing from the parade route to the main park at the center of this section of town. They perused some of the tables and vendors, content to be somewhere slightly less noisy.

Lots of people were waving and smiling at them; Nick let Charlie determine how they responded. Sometimes he just waved back. A few times, he consented to being in pictures with strangers or posing just the two of them together depending on the request. Mostly they weren’t talking, just soaking up the atmosphere, the ease that can come from being in a mostly-rainbow crowd.

After they’d each managed to find something more filling to eat, sitting tucked away in a quiet side street, and rejoined the throng, a young woman with green hair approached Charlie with clear intentions of chatting. She was followed by another person with a professional-looking camera on their shoulder.

“Hi there! I’m Jessica with Lavender 4 Radio; can I interview you for our report on this year’s Pride? We have a podcast and YouTube, thus the video capture.” Charlie glanced at Nick who smiled and shrugged, clearly making it the younger man’s call. Charlie took a deep breath and nodded at her.

“Great! Thank you so much! Can we step just over to this side? Zem, do you have a good angle? Ok, let’s begin; just speak freely and I promise to edit it so it sounds good,” she smiled warmly and pulled a large fluffy microphone out of her bag, holding it up in front of Charlie. “So who do I have the pleasure of talking with today?”

“I am the One in Black and this is my pet.” Nick blushed and leaned into his side shyly, grateful they were doing this in character and he wouldn’t have to say anything. Just look pretty; the empty blue sky was still easy to find. Charlie reached over with his left hand and drew Nick’s left hand in front of them, interweaving their fingers and locking their arms in place at their waist.

“And you two were on the kink float, is that right?” At Charlie’s nod, she continued. “I’m sure you’re aware of how controversial having kink at these events can be.” Charlie just nodded again. “A man of few words, I see.” Her tone was light, her face encouraging.

Charlie cleared his throat. “Yes, we are aware that some object to kink elements here, and everywhere really, but we are not ashamed to admit our love does not fit into any cisheteronormative limitations.”

Jessica blinked and grinned at him. “Oh! A man of many words, big words even! I love it! Please continue. Why SHOULD kink be at Pride then?”

Charlie hesitated a moment to gather Nick’s nonverbal agreement; the excitement on his beloved’s face was the endorsement he needed. “Okay, yeah. Kink should be at Pride because we need to keep celebrating the full diversity of disruptive love. As queer people, it helps us remember and honor those who did this work before us.”

At Jessica’s nod, he stretched his shoulders back a bit and continued. “I believe queerness and kinkiness are far more common that people want to acknowledge.” He looked into the camera directly. “Every cishet couple out there who enjoys spanking or handcuffs or roleplay: you are kinky whether you use that word for yourself or not.”

Jessica’s breathless giggle was like fuel on the fire in Charlie’s belly; Nick could see it. “Every person who has a same-sex crush on a celebrity: you’re not as straight as you think you are.” Jessica pulled in her lips, eyes shining and wide.

“Healthy kink is consensual, safe and sane. It’s about trust… affection… and respecting all the ways humans are wired for pleasure.” The words just poured out of him now. “Kink is NOT for everyone, that’s true. But everything doesn’t have to be FOR everyone. There are parts of kink WE don’t do, plenty of them!” Charlie used his free hand to wave between himself and Nick.

“To anyone squicked out by the very idea of kink, please take some responsibility and use your mature discernment to just filter it out of your life. Stop complaining about how we quote unquote don’t belong,” he bobbed his head, “in any space whatsoever. Or how you think we’re disgusting. You’re not in charge of who gets to be an acceptable human being in public.”

“And if you’re LGBT plus, please stop playing respectability politics with the rest of us. We’re on the slippery slope together. Outsiders want us rainbow people fighting amongst ourselves instead of uniting in resistance and for social change. We still have so much work to do, protecting trans people, disabled people, racialized people...”

Nick was nearly bouncing; this… was a dream. Everyone watching would get to see the brilliant brain he loved with all his heart.

“I believe most of us want a world where it doesn’t matter who and how you love but we’re not there yet. So I’d like everyone listening to please speak up for those next to you in this messy life… as well as yourself!” Charlie paused there and tilted his head.

“But maybe that’s the problem: not enough self-esteem. Not enough of us knowing our worth doesn’t depend on the opinion of others.” Charlie glanced at Nick then and smiled softly. “Not enough of us knowing what love is meant to feel like.” He looked back at the camera. “If that’s you, I hope you get help… and healing. The world needs your best self to show up.” He turned and looked Jessica in the eye again.

She cleared her throat. “That was… wow…,” she nodded and then glanced at Nick momentarily. “Is your pet allowed to talk?”

“Of course.” With that, the microphone was in Nick’s face. He blinked at it and then the young woman. She just raised her eyebrows expectantly.

Nick smiled a little lop-sided and glanced over at Charlie; the blue eyes glittered at him from their alien setting, full of love. “Ummm… all I want to say is… my fiancé is my favorite person.” With that, he pulled his lips in and would not let the interviewer coax another word out of him. He fixed his eyes on Charlie’s as the camera operator kept rolling.

“Yes, I think we’re good then.” She straightened up. “Zem, you good?” At the other person’s grunt, she thanked them both and confirmed they did not want to provide any real names nor contact information. She and Zem quickly disappeared into the crowd.

Nick began laughing and embracing Charlie, crushing him to his chest and leaning back so the combat boots came off the ground. “THAT WAS SO…!!! YOU KILLED IT!!!”

Charlie was breathless for obvious reasons but soon they were just grinning and shaking their heads at each other. “Are you ready to go home?” The dark-haired man was quiet now, maybe a little drained.

“God yes!” Nick wrapped one arm around him and looked around. “Do we need to find Rocky?”

“No,” Charlie shook his head. “I told him we’d find another way home. Come on, the bus stop is this way.” Nick nodded and they walked off hand in hand.

After showers and naps and catching up with their friends via text/socials and then an easy late supper, they fell into bed together, chest to chest on their sides. Nick caressed Charlie’s sleepy face with quiet tenderness.

“Thank you,” he began. Charlie hummed inquisitively. “For everything. For this week. For taking care of me.” Nick rolled onto his back and pulled the smaller man into his flank. “For being the bravest and strongest and fucking BEST man I know.” He squeezed and Charlie huffed. Nick turned and kissed the black curls softly.

“I mean it, Charlie Spring. I love you more than I can say and I am so looking forward to spending the next three weeks just hanging out with you and enjoying some quiet time. I want to take long walks and go out for brunch again. Maybe one night of dancing. Just us though, like a honeymoon preview. I just shared you with, like, the entire world and now I want you all to myself for a bit.”

Charlie nodded. “I love you too, you big sap.” They both smiled and wiggled and nuzzled and then fell asleep tangled in each other’s arms.

By the end of the next day, their staycation plan was completely blown to smithereens.

The first video of them from Lavender 4 Radio was a largely unedited replay of the entire interview. It went viral.

Charlie found out first; his alarmed squeak brought Nick’s head around in a snap from where he’d been leaning on him as they snuggled on the couch. They watched the view numbers climb for a bit; Charlie couldn’t stop hitting the refresh button.

As soon as they started reading the comments, Nick knew this could become a serious issue. Most were positive, glowing even, and he smiled but of course the trolls didn’t take long to find them. He laid his hand over the screen after Charlie’s third scowl.

“Love… hey… will you do me a favor?” Charlie looked up and blinked dazedly. “Charlie.” The younger man shivered and focused. “Go text Cliff, babe; just give him a heads up and a report of what you did yesterday and see how soon you can process more with him. Can you do that for me, please?”

Charlie nodded silently, stood and padded into the bedroom. Nick returned to his phone and pulled up the video there, reading back through some of the comments. He screenshot a few to show Charlie or others later.

[This guy is awesome! I never thought about it but he’s right!]

[Shit! Now I’m thinking about Tom Hardy again… Am I actually a little bit gay for him? HAHAHA!]

[Is it just me or are these two somehow the sweetest thing ever, even though they’re talking about kink?! How?! It’s wholesome and I am confused.]

[THE HEART EYES ARE REAL FAM]

[omg i feel so… seen. thank you thank you thank you! i love the one in black!]

Then he did some searching on socials and found out why it was going viral, what users had been spreading it; he found much the same ratio and he felt a little relieved that the reaction was largely positive.

Nick took a deep breath and let it out as his eyes moved around the living room without seeing anything. He hadn’t really thought about it beforehand but of course this had been one of the risks of the whole thing all along.

He rubbed his jaw and tried to just feel all his feelings about his face being splashed across the internet. Charlie’s true visage was pretty well concealed by the hair gel and the makeup but not him. Maybe… maybe it was time to grow a beard…

Chapter Text

A part of Charlie withdrew. There was the Charlie who talked and walked and who said and did the right things. Who managed to process with Cliff and who managed to hear the love and support expressed by Nick and their friends.

But deep inside, there was also a fragile naked pink baby bird folded into itself within a brittle eggshell. This Charlie was not okay. This part shivered and shook.

The automaton Charlie had people deliver more groceries. He agreed with Nick about him growing a beard, grateful they already had three more weeks off to hide out. He appointed Tori to scour the internet for trolls, reporting them and sometimes rebutting them from an anonymous account; Nick had Darcy doing the same.

Pictures from the event added to the frenzy online. A few locals were gleefully naming them, outing them, at first but Rocky, Scarlet and their allies within the Planning Committee were able to shut it down and get those comments and posts removed.

The One and his pet might be somewhat famous but Charlie and Nick did not want to be famous at all.

Family was the hardest. Nick had a warm but brief video call with his mum; she was mostly avoiding the coverage and promised to run interference with Stéphane and David.

Charlie, with Cliff and Nick’s help, wrote his parents an email instead of answering any of their calls.

\\Dear Mom and Dad, I understand you’re upset because you’ve learned some things about me and Nick that you don’t like knowing. We agreed to that interview and I meant everything I said, including the part about not everything being FOR everyone. Our sex life is none of your business just like yours is none of mine. So while this information escaped the tiny corner of the internet I thought it would live in, it remains off-limits within the context of my relationship with both of you. No, we are not going to discuss it. I don’t owe you more of an explanation nor reasons nor justification. We are going to place it back behind proper boundaries, period. So the next time you get in touch, please be prepared to discuss wedding planning instead. Our colors are royal blue and golden yellow. What kind of decorations are you thinking about doing? Thank you again for the kind offer. Love, Charlie//

At night the first week, Charlie made desperate love to his fiancé, wordless fucking where he chased his own orgasm and then collapsed into the little spoon position. Nick held him and kept his own counsel.

The second week, Charlie just shook his head and hugged Nick from behind, burying his face in the broad shoulder blades and forcing his rigid body through breathing exercises until he could fall asleep.

Their days were full of distractions. MarioKart and movies and virtual game sessions with their friends. They cooked together and drank lots of wine. Nick baked and Charlie read. Nick used his hand weights, huffing and puffing all over the flat trying to get some kind of workout accomplished. Charlie drummed.

As they soldiered into the weekend before the last week of their staycation, Nick sought out every chance to cuddle and Charlie started to soften in his arms. He still wouldn’t cry but he would tremble and then sigh and doze. Nick stroked a hand through the soft curls and rubbed his itchy jaw into the top of Charlie’s head, content and hopeful.

Inside the shell, the baby bird was growing feathers and stretching its tiny wings.

Tuesday morning, they agreed they’d try going back to Trivia Night at the Hearth the next week. Nick said he might consider brunch out on Friday. The online hubbub had died down; the greedy attention of the mob had moved on.

Wednesday afternoon, they were waking up from a shared nap and the light was just so and Charlie was scratching the nascent beard which was just starting to be silken even if not yet thick. Nick’s eyes were closed as he happily rumbled.

“Hi,” came a breathless whisper.

The brown eyes opened and held the blue. Two shy smiles preceded the reply. “Hi.”

Charlie pulled in his lips and took a deep breath. “Thank you,” he exhaled. Nick’s eyebrows quirked. “For being patient.” A broad hand soothed a narrow bicep.

Charlie swallowed. “I need your help.” Nick nodded encouragingly. “I want us to reset. I feel like I used you to get off there for a bit. I don’t know what I was trying to prove to myself and I know you consented to the sex but it still wasn’t…,” his eyes wandered away for a beat, “well, it wasn’t okay with me, what I was doing. So I…,” he sighed, “I pulled back, right? And now I want to reset.” Nick smiled and nodded and rubbed his arm, all tiny movements.

The younger man shook out his shoulders, folded his hands together and laid them down between them, closing his eyes. “I don’t know why… but I think… the reset I need… is flipping the script.”

The blue eyes snapped open and bored into the brown. A shaky audible breath on top of a steady silent backdrop. Trembling hands covered by one warm hand.

Bodies synching. Settling. Smiling.

Plummy lips twisting this way and that… and then opening. “I want you to take me. … Make me. Hold me down and fuck me into the mattress.” A subtle flicker over the listening face. Blue eyes dancing back and forth, monitoring. “Not right now. And only if you want to, of course. If you can.”

Charlie subsided. After a few beats, he opened his mouth again… and caught himself and smiled weakly and gently bit down on the tip of his own tongue before closing his lips awkwardly around it. Nick smiled warmly and drifted back into his thoughts and feelings.

He refocused on the handsome face across from him. He sniffed and nodded. “I can do that. Parameters?”

Charlie grinned and they worked out some details before getting up to start on dinner prep.

Friday brunch went well; whether or not anyone recognized them, nobody bothered them and they could feel the edges of normalcy.

Saturday morning, they had a simple breakfast and Nick made sure to be the one jumping up to refill Charlie’s mug. Later when they watched a movie on the couch, he had the smaller man in front of him and shirtless so he could give him a back rub.

Halfway through the film, Charlie fell asleep in his arms and Nick spent a long time watching him as he gathered himself. Finally turning off the screen, he cradled the slender frame to his chest and stood up. Charlie’s eyes fluttered open on the walk into the bedroom.

Nick crushed him closer and kissed him, breaching those delicious lips with his tongue almost immediately and swallowing up the sharp intake of breath. Growling the word “mine” as he threw him face down on the bed, he quickly captured both hands and drew them together into one of his own. His other hand quelled the wiggly hips and pulled the pants down and the legs apart.

Low whimpers got louder as he pumped the lube bottle and intruded a little roughly into Charlie’s rear passage. After getting more lube, Nick laid down next to him and chewed on the quivering shoulders as his fingers continued their work.

Carefully interspersing his snarls with the noises from the younger man, Nick eventually turned his slick hand to his own prep before rolling on top of the wiggling frame. His knees shoving the others aside, he used both hands to pull his own pants down and then settled them next to Charlie’s hips before pressing himself in only slightly faster than usual.

Then he leaned his torso down and found both slender wrists with his fingers. The gasps coming from underneath him took on a new urgency and he began to grind and growl. Soon both of them were panting and moaning. His hips pistoning and driving the ass below him slightly up and down on the mattress with every thrust, Nick let himself lose it in the sensations finally.

His cries reached full volume just slightly ahead of Charlie’s and he slowed and eased back down, moving his hands next to the callused ones and rubbing them with his thumbs. Then he stopped rocking altogether and settled his head into the curve of Charlie’s neck, face sideways looking out at the bedroom, and tried to catch his breath.

After a few minutes, he eased out and rolled off; Charlie immediately turned and curled into his arms. He was nodding as his breathing still stuttered in his throat and he nuzzled into Nick’s chest readily but the breathing went straight from ragged spent passion to just ragged and then he was sobbing as Nick held and soothed him.

The minutes stretched like this until they both finally shook themselves free of the swirl of intensity. Charlie pulled back just enough to wipe his face and make eye contact. Nick’s face was calm but attentive and searching.

Charlie’s smile was watery but fond and Nick felt the easing inside his abdomen. They held each other quietly more long minutes before Charlie started peppering the freckled face with soft, grateful kisses. Nick chuckled breathlessly as the curly head slowly started worming its way south.

“Welcome back, love.”

The eggshell lay broken in its nest, the chick striving onward with its unsteady but determined claws and its stiffening neck hungry for life.

Chapter Text

Nick shook out his shoulders and paced one more lap around the large island in the rental hall kitchen, one hand coming up to rub at the thick russet beard covering his jaw. As he turned the last corner, the door to the main room silently swung open outwards and he tugged on one dapper cuff as he stepped through it.

He was vaguely aware of the crowd to his right, standing silently as the music swelled. He was vaguely aware of the bouquets to his left, masking the otherwise plain walls. His eyes were fixed on the man emerging from the hallway directly across from him.

Both faces were alight. He drank in every detail as his feet carried him to the center where a woman in a white robe stood waiting for them. The crisp grey vested suit with black lapels and shiny black dress shoes, setting off the jet curls perfectly. The single red rosebud tucked just there, reminding him of a certain Valentine’s Day years ago which was still one of the best and most memorable dates in his life.

Now was another, he could already tell. Nick took a deep breath and gathered the strong lean hands in his own as everyone sat.

“Hi.”

“Hi.”

Not even thirty minutes later, he was kissing his favorite person while everyone clapped and a few cheered. It felt like the perfect acknowledgement of how absolutely right it was that he was kissing his favorite person. He didn’t want to stop.

Two hours later, he found himself standing in front of a beautiful cake, crisp white tiers covered in whimsical royal blue wave scrolls and golden yellow sugar flowers. He was expected to cut it up but he didn’t want to; he hoped the photographer had captured every detail.

Someone assured him they had and then it didn’t matter because Charlie’s hand was on top of his own holding the knife and there it went and little pieces were falling off and they were picking them up and holding them out so tenderly and everyone was cooing at them and he wondered if he’d eaten lunch but he figured he had because Charlie had planned most of today and so it was perfect.

He was perfect. Nick became aware he was staring again at the younger man, who had lost the coat and rolled up his white shirt sleeves somewhere along the way. He was no doubt grinning proudly as Charlie walked up holding the elbow of a very frail and hunched over woman with silver curls; on her other elbow was his grandfather, equally frail by now.

Charlie waved at Nick. “Tía Carmen, es mi novio Nick.”

The old man tsked and waggled his finger at the one in grey. “No, tu esposo, Carlito. Tu esposo ahora.”

Charlie blushed and looked up at Nick through his eyelashes. “Sí, abuelo, sí. Mi esposo.”

Nick pulled in his lips and widened his eyes with delight before turning and embracing his new Great-Aunt Carmen. She clucked over them both and then waved her hand in the direction of their hovering faces, a river of sibilant words pouring over them in obvious benediction. They all smiled at each other before Nick was dragged away by another guest.

Not long after that, he was shoved into the supply room and ordered to change out of his dark green suit with the boutonnière matching Charlie’s and the brown dress shoes; he laughed as he pulled the new outfit out of the bag Tara had handed him.

As he reentered the main room, he saw the hall staff clearing away the tables and chairs. He frowned and tried to remember saying goodbye to people. Then he saw his mum walking over to him; she had changed too, trading her pale green ensemble for a loose, flowing purple dress and pink flip flops that matched his own.

She caught him looking down and paused a few meters away. They wiggled their matching purple toes at each other and laughed. Then she closed the distance and hugged him tightly; he knew they were both thinking of their mani-pedi date with Charlie a few days ago. That man really did think of everything.

Smiling from ear to ear, she pulled back and extended her arm, waving him towards the double doors standing wide open at one end of the hall. As they emerged into the late afternoon sun, he saw a group milling on the side of the parking lot.

A yell went up and a dark head whipped around. “Finally!” came a shout in a familiar voice and Charlie wiggled out of the group and hurried up to them. “Come on! Tao will want us there to light the pile soon!”

“Wait! Wait!” Elle was right behind him holding out yet another tote bag. Thanking her profusely, Charlie took it, pulled out a headband covered in plastic flowers making a rainbow and planted it on Nick’s head. Then he pulled a matching corsage out and slid it onto his own left wrist.

Nick was vaguely aware his mum had walked further apart in order to take photos of this moment as he beamed at the two of them and he could already picture it in his mind.

His own tank top was pink and purple ombre over blue denim shorts. The one on Charlie was green and white ombre over matching shorts. But it was the words which still made him chortle: large black letters on both chests proudly proclaiming “1 of 2 grooms”.

One lean hand reached out. Nick looked at it, the clear nail polish Charlie’s only concession to a somewhat-traditional look today. He enveloped it in his own, matching nail polish and complementary rings making it picture perfect.

They turned and lead their friends across the street to the beach where they would party through the sunset and kiss a thousand more times. Nick shook out his shoulders with pride, knowing he would be kissing this man, his husband, for the rest of his life.

Chapter Text

Animated_Garbage made us all art based on the wedding outfits last chapter!!!

Charlie’s little face!!! Nick’s heart eyes!!!

I am ded.

But not really. In case you missed it, this fic got stalled when I had a dream about Charlie in a stained jumper and woke up having to explain it. I’m wrapping up the second fic in that universe now and then my squirrel brain will let me come back here and take these men all the way home.

I promise.

Now then… please give it up for Animated_Garbage and their talent and their heart and their generosity! 🥰

Chapter Text

Charlie had left the suitcase with all their clothes and sundries already in it on the bed and open wide; all his husband had had to do was add a few things he wanted, zip it closed and roll it out. So he’s not sure why they got flagged for an inspection to one side after the carryon went through the x-ray. He followed the officer and stood nearby pinching the bridge of his nose.

Nick picked up the backpack full of books as well as his wallet, phone and keys off the conveyer belt and followed them but the officer by the suitcase was glaring just at Charlie as he pulled out the metal canister, opened it and frowned at the bottle within. Charlie’s face went deep red and he glanced at Nick.

Nick grimaced and stepped in between them. “What’s the problem?” The older beefy white man blinked up at him, his mouth frozen before he could say whatever he had planned to say to Charlie.

After a few beats with no progress on the other man’s face, Nick shrugged. “It’s lube. So what?” The officer looked at it again and his head jerked repeatedly to one side like a broken robot in an assembly line.

Nick sidled up to Charlie and wrapped his free arm around the narrow shoulders. “It’s our honeymoon. May we go now please?” His words may have been polite but his tone was a little clipped.

Charlie dropped his hand from his nose and coughed into it before mumbling to the bigger man, “I mean… we could have just bought a new bottle when we got there.”

Nick blinked down at him. “Oh… true. But we just opened this one! And we buy the good stuff; would they even have it?” The blue eyes widened up at him and the bee-stung lips pulled in. “What?!” Charlie just shook his head and Nick smiled at him before shrugging and turning back to the officer.

There was sweat on the man’s brow and his left eye was twitching slightly. Nick tilted his head at him. “Are you okay?” Wordlessly, the man shoved the lid back on and stuffed the canister into the suitcase. He stepped away just far enough to indicate the inspection was complete.

Nick nodded at him and handed the backpack to Charlie so he could zip up the suitcase. Reaching over to do so put him uncomfortably close to the still tight-lipped authority figure. As he completed the circuit of the zipper and yanked it up by its handle, he glanced over at the older man.

“So you’ve never used lube before, eh?” Nick’s voice was soft. “You should try it; it’s good for releasing… negative emotions.” He smiled at the pole-axed figure as he linked his arm through Charlie’s and then they walked off. Once they’d been swallowed by the crowd, the dark-haired man used his free hand to swat at his husband’s bicep; he shook his head fondly.

It took them all day to get there. A flight, a taxi, a ferry and then finally they were just walking up a hill under a dusky blue sky on a warm summer evening. The trip’s worries and cares sloughed off their backs and they grinned at each other.

When they checked in, the staff were professional and kind, full of congratulations. Charlie pushed open the door to their bungalow and sighed happily. He dropped the backpack on a chair, kicked off his shoes and flopped onto the bed.

Nick chuckled softly behind him. Hefting the suitcase he’d had to carry most of the walk due to cobble-stoned streets, he stepped further into the room and found a dresser to put it on.

He walked around the corner and Charlie heard him give a low whistle of appreciation. He smiled to himself. He knew how impressive this place was. They had their own custom-stocked kitchenette plus a bathroom with a huge tub on a platform, complete with jets. Out back should be a semi-private set of chaise lounges and a direct path to the nude beach. He closed his eyes and let himself drift off as he heard Nick bustling around.

It was late evening when he sat up and stretched. He went looking for his husband. First he found a variety of snacks laid out on the small table in the kitchenette. But no Nick and no note.

He peered through the sliding glass door at the back; no Nick on the dimly lit seats outside. He turned, hearing a low hum, and pushed the bathroom door open to find the tub already mostly full and his husband in it leaning back with his eyes closed and a big smile on his face. The hum appeared to be active jets behind him.

Charlie smirked and stepped completely into the room. “Comfy?” Nick’s eyes opened halfway and the smile got impossibly bigger; one hand lazily rose and beckoned him in.

Charlie held up a finger and stepped through another door on one side to use the toilet. When he emerged, he had left his trousers, pants and socks in the smaller room. He stepped to the sink to wash his hands and he heard another appreciative whistle.

He laughed, turned and started to unbutton his shirt. Nick’s eyes were still half-lidded but absolutely locked onto what he was doing. He moved slowly, sinuously. By the time he was within reach of one broad hand, the last button was undone but the fabric still mostly covered him.

He let his arms fall to his sides and shifted in coordination with Nick so that the hand could slide in between the shirt and his skin, still warm from his nap. Nick moaned and sat up to more fully embrace him, pulling him as close as he could given he wasn’t in the water yet.

Their lips crashed together and Charlie leaned into the slot he owned within Nick’s orbit, arms folding around his neck and shoulders aligning them as their heads swayed and turned. Nick’s hand was leaving a wet trail across his back as it slid down to grab one cheek. Charlie felt himself straining up onto his toes to bring more of their bodies into close contact.

Finally breaking apart only to hear the familiar hitch in Nick’s breathing, Charlie let one side of the shirt fall away. He turned and looked over his bare arm at the other man, who was sitting back to watch with wonder and love in his warm eyes.

Charlie let his chin drop so he could unleash the full effect as he looked up through his lashes. Nick’s reaction was all he could dream and he felt the energy crackle between them. Somehow it was electric but like lightning through honey, everything sharp and sweet at the same time.

He turned so his back was to the tub and let the shirt drop to the floor. He stood there another moment, feeling the flex and play of his muscles as he imagined Nick’s gaze landing on them.

Then he was lifting one leg in and then the other and then he was easing himself into the heat and then he was floating over to press his torso against his husband’s and return his arms to their home around his neck.

They bent and rested their foreheads together, Nick’s arms locking onto Charlie’s waist. “I feel like we already had one honeymoon,” he heard the larger man murmur. He hummed his question. “That month off with you last year was so…” Nick pulled back to make eye contact.

Charlie rocked his body through the water so it bounced off the other man but otherwise waited it out, confident Nick would only say loving things.

Nick’s eyes were boring into him but he saw the wheels still turning. “Charlie, do you…,” one of Nick’s hands came up to trace against a cheekbone, “do you even know how much that meant? Everything you did and said and how you handled it?”

Charlie’s head tilted. “Pride?” Needing clarification but not wanting to derail the train of thought by saying too much. Nick nodded.

“All of it but yeah. The way you took care of me leading up to it. The parade. The interview. How you found your boundaries afterwards.” Nick cleared his throat. “Have you noticed what’s shifted… between us?” Charlie’s brows came together. “No? Okay.” Nick’s thumb came over to soothe them back. “It’s like… the balance, I don’t know, solidified. Our balance.”

Charlie’s eyebrows were pushing stubbornly against Nick’s attempts and he dropped his hand with a chuckle. “Less touching and more words, yes ok.” He looked away and let that hand settle back onto Charlie’s waist.

“I don’t know, maybe it’s just solidified inside me,” came low and sideways. Charlie rubbed the top of his head into Nick’s temple gently and was squeezed in response. “I know we’ve talked about this before and I know I can care too much about what other people think but, Charlie,” he turned back and met the blue eyes again, “the whole world got to see how incredible you are…”

Charlie felt his hands go from lying loose to gripping his elbows and he opened his mouth into a small circle and let the air out in a slow, deliberate breath while he stretched one finger at a time. Nick paused until Charlie nodded.

“You ARE.” Another squeeze. “And even though not everybody we know knows it was you, something in… my perception of their perceptions, I guess…” He snorted softly. “Am I making any sense?”

Charlie smiled, a tiny wobble of closed lips. Nick swallowed. “I think I stopped worrying about other people thinking you’re small and weak.” Charlie blinked. “I’ve known for a long time you’re not but I didn’t realize I assumed other people still thought so. Until the assumption went away…”

Now they both smiled at each other, eyes darting across faces, air soft around them. “Ok you sap, now less words and more touching.” Charlie leaned in for a lingering kiss.

When he pulled back once more so they could breathe, Nick’s mouth was already chasing his but the larger man surrendered and paused there. After a moment, he mumbled, “Plus you know what you do to me when you order me around or take care of everything…”

Charlie smirked, eyebrows bouncing. Nick huffed an indignant laugh and closed the distance between them again, deepening the kiss immediately.

As their bodies heated due to the water and their activity in it, Charlie felt himself floating, pushing higher to let the air cool along his torso. Soon he had Nick’s neck bent fully back as he chewed and sucked down onto Nick’s tongue. The sounds the man under him was making were so delicious!

Nick’s hands had been flailing along his flanks when they suddenly grabbed his ass and pulled him down until their cocks were sliding along each other. Charlie’s head fell back and he moaned, loud and wild.

Nick’s crow of delight was brief but clear before their mouths resumed trying to consume the other. Then Charlie felt the welcome scratch of the bearded face starting to nip along his jawline and onto his neck. Nick lingered on each of his particular spots, all well memorized by now. He let himself vocalize just how much it affected him.

In fact, it was REALLY affecting him. His blood was already boiling, the tension low inside his pelvis already gathering. He panted and whined, “Niiiiiiick, I need… oh god… can we… uhhhh… can you…”

Nick licked the love bite he had just gnawed into his collarbone and returned to his ear. “What, babe?” he whispered. Charlie shook his curls.

“I dunno…,” he gasped as their cocks bumped again. “Just already so… ready…”

Nick’s chuckle was a little smug. “It’s the hot water; it speeds up the process.” He pulled back a tad and smirked into Charlie’s desperate face. “I researched it when you said we basically would have a hot tub.”

Charlie rolled his eyes. “You researched it…,” Nick’s teeth were on his shoulder and his nerves were straining. “Of course you did,” he managed before letting the sensations render him speechless.

Nick released his flesh with a loud popping noise and grinned. “Mmm hmm! And guess what else?!” He turned and Charlie heard the familiar sound of their pump bottle. “Our silicone lube is perfect for having sex in water.”

Charlie noted the arrogant look on his husband’s face but when the wide, slick hand pulled their cocks tightly together, he couldn’t bring himself to mind. He pushed up enough to see their canister sitting on the shelf just past the tub platform and then he sighed and drifted those centimeters back down, closing his eyes and letting his mouth fall open to emote through what promised to be the first and maybe the fastest of many orgasms here.

The next morning was lazy simultaneous blowjobs and naked tag around the bungalow. It was languid foreplay in the rainforest-style shower. It was snacks and tea and laughter.

In the afternoon, they ventured into the back area, still naked. Standing near the edge of their semi-enclosed space, they could see quite a bit of the nude beach, which had an impressive number of people on it this time of day. Charlie turned, a smirk forming only to fade as soon as he saw the frown on Nick’s face.

He raised a hand and stroked along the beard. “You okay, bubby?” Nick smiled and turned into it.

After a few beats, he looked into Charlie’s eyes and wrinkled his nose, one hand coming up to catch at a narrow hip and draw them closer still. “Ermmmm. These guys are all…,” he glanced down at their bodies pressing together. “Umm… ripped.”

Charlie blinked. Nick looked up and then away, blushing. His hand left Charlie’s hip and rubbed across his belly roll, then gave it a soft pat. “This isn’t getting any smaller and I never wanted to be a true gym rat but just…,” the hand came up and waved towards the crowd, “this… this place seems to have a type, don’t you think?”

Charlie’s mouth pulled to one side as his glance raked over the beach with more assessment than aesthetic appreciation this time. He nodded. “Yeah, you’re right.” He rolled his lips. “We did come at Peak Gay Season.” Nick chuckled.

They stood there, each with an arm loose around the other, silently surveying and pondering. Nick grimaced again. “Ummm, I think most of these guys are…,” he dropped his chin in Charlie’s direction, “not on their honeymoon… if you know what I mean.”

Charlie tilted his head. “So?”

Nick’s nose scrunched up. “So if any of them hits on you, I want them to know I’m not sharing!” he whined. Charlie pulled in his lips and laid one hand flat on Nick’s chest, leaning in over it and looking up into his face.

“No being jealous on our honeymoon!” Nick pouted a bit at that but both sets of eyes were twinkling. Charlie looked at his fingertips tapping on and twirling through the soft short hairs there.

He hummed a moment. “All those men out there are dehydrated and desperate,” that got Nick to snort so he continued, “or most of them anyway. You know I don’t want any of them and I know you don’t want any of them.”

They nodded solemnly at each other. “So we can mostly stay here in our little bubble and that’s fine but let’s not shy away from exploring what’s nice here just because we don’t fit the type. We never have, right?” Nick’s smile was proud and warm. He gathered both of Charlie’s hands in his and pulled them to his mouth for a kiss.

Charlie grinned at him. “Besides we ARE going dancing at least one night here,” he teased. Nick’s eyes got a little wide at that. Charlie shrugged. “But I brought outfits for that!” Nick’s sigh of relief got Charlie giggling.

Then he laid his head down, tucked under Nick’s chin, and their arms snaked back around each other. They stood there breathing together for a timeless time.

Nick’s face was towards the sea and Charlie could hear a low rumble take shape inside the broad chest. He smiled. It was the sound of his husband’s daydreams, a tuneless song born from Nick’s absorption in a new train of thought. Charlie began to sway the two of them back and forth, tiny movements at first that got wider but slow and gentle.

Nick’s arms suddenly got tighter around him and they each pulled their faces back to smile into the other’s eyes. Nick bobbled his head a little sheepishly. “Ummm, I mean… I’ve never been swimming naked before…” Charlie’s mouth widened and he nodded vigorously.

“You totally should!” He glanced out at the unshaded beach. “Let me get the sunscreen for you,” he dropped his arms and stepped away, scurrying inside and returning a minute later with a big tube of it and a stack of towels he dropped on one chaise. “Turn around.”

Nick’s chin dropped to his chest and he pivoted, a shy smile playing on his face. As Charlie’s skillful hands started just below the blondish hair and worked their way down his back, he closed his eyes and sighed happily.

When Charlie thoroughly covered his glutes with the lotion, he squealed and giggled. Charlie grinned and increased the pressure as he kept applying it lower and lower, massaging the calves in a way that made Nick’s head loll back.

“Chaaaaarlie… that feels so good,” he moaned. The other man was on his knees now, reaching around with more sunscreen to cover the tops of Nick’s feet, his shoulder bumping into the backs of his thighs. He chuckled softly and whispered for him to turn around again.

When Nick spun back, their eyes met and Charlie paused there, hands falling back and mouth falling open as he very deliberately let his eyes drift down the full length of Nick’s body. He didn’t try to hide any of his feelings, his reactions.

By the time he got to Nick’s groin, much of Nick was trembling. His hands were clenching and unclenching at his sides. His hips were quivering. And that cock Charlie loved was blooming right in front of him. He smiled and looked back up to meet the brown eyes, blown pupils making them almost black.

Charlie rocked back onto his heels and straightened up slowly, letting his eyes rake over Nick’s torso once more. He gathered more of the sun-blocking lotion and slowly, carefully used one or two fingers at a time to cover every precious freckle on Nick’s face. The brown eyes closed somewhere in there and the tuneless song returned as Nick melted into his lover’s ministrations again.

Occasionally Charlie would sway forward to gently bump their pelvises together, just enough to keep the sexual tension simmering. The humming was punctuated with tiny gasps as a result and he grinned as he worked.

Using both hands at once, he got the shells of Nick’s ears, the sides of his neck. Using the pads of his thumbs, he covered the underside of his chin and the front of Nick’s neck, pausing once to push slightly against the Adam’s apple. Nick’s eyes flew open at that and his sharp intake of breath made Charlie smirk and nod thoughtfully.

He got another generous handful of the goopy white stuff, Nick’s eyes now tracking his every movement, and started to spread it across the collarbones and pecs. They both swayed and moaned a little as he made sure to go around each nipple thoroughly.

Then Charlie stepped to one side and rubbed down from that shoulder around the beloved bicep, around the forearm and including the back of the hand. He took a moment to make sure that flank was covered. Then he grabbed the tube again and circled behind the swaying man. He repeated the entire sequence on the other side.

Stepping back in front, he was gratified to see Nick’s cock was still turgid and he nodded his approval to the other man who took a shuddering breath and then smiled bashfully. The air around them shimmered with lust and care.

Charlie had the tube in one hand and was squeezing out more sunscreen as he dropped to his haunches and proceeded to cover the fronts of Nick’s legs starting at the ankles and working his way up. Nick’s head dropped back with a tiny sigh as Charlie kneaded the lotion into the skin across each hip.

Still bent down, Charlie sent his hands up across the strong abdomen, rubbing the lotion into every muscle and every ripple of chub with equal love. Nick’s head rolled forward and his eyes fluttered open to watch all of this.

Finally the dark-haired man grabbed a towel, placed it on the ground between them and settled his knees on it. He made very deliberate eye contact and tapped the inside of one of Nick’s thighs with the back of his hand.

Nick swallowed, nodded and widened his stance. Charlie got yet more sunscreen and he went around the top of each leg very thoroughly. His curls bent and brushed against the point where they met and Nick groaned above him.

One more generous squeeze and the tube was now nearly empty. Charlie was overtly staring at the cock straining and pulsing in his direction. His lips parted and the tip of his tongue licked up into the top one. Nick’s eyes narrowed and he held his breath.

The blue eyes flicked up as the hands wiped around… and around… and then engulfed the shaft and took a firm grip on it. Nick’s mouth was wide open and still not breathing yet. Charlie’s brows pinched a moment. “You ready to come on me, Nelson?” he rasped.

All the air rushed into Nick at once as his face fell forward and he caught himself from completely folding onto the smaller man. The hands began to move, slow at first as the sunscreen found every inch and then a furious pace determined to reward his husband’s patience.

Very soon after that, Nick’s whole body arched and he boiled over the two hands, some spunk flying across the gap to land on Charlie’s perfect skin and his delighted face. After shaking there for numberless beats, Nick dropped his hips, pulling himself from the other’s grasp with a large moan. His arms crushed the two of them together and his forehead fell onto a narrow shoulder as his knees met Charlie’s on the towel.

He panted there as Charlie hugged him back using mostly his elbows and chuckled softly. After a few minutes, Nick pulled back and asked a wordless question with his eyes. Charlie shook his head.

“I’m good for now, bubby. You go swim and I’ll get cleaned up and read for a while.” He kissed the tip of Nick’s nose and they smiled at each other. Nick waggled his head gratefully and stood.

“I love you.”

Charlie fumbled to his feet a little awkwardly, still holding his hands carefully away from everything, and then picked up the towel to wipe them off. He smiled easily up at his husband as he handed it over.

“I know.” He grinned cheekily and Nick snorted before leaning in for a tender kiss. As they parted, Charlie murmured, “I love you too.”

Nick’s smile pulled to one side. “You… the One.. you’ve trained me well, you know.” Charlie’s eyebrows shot up at that and Nick stepped forward until their chests were touching and dropped his forehead to rest on the jet-coloured curls.

He shrugged. “I’m not embarrassed anymore about my hair trigger. Like at all.” He pulled back and they smiled at each other. “I’m really lucky, in more ways than one.” They laughed. He rubbed his nose into the other man’s a moment. “I like how easily you get me off. You’re so fucking good at it.”

Charlie rolled his eyes fondly and, reclaiming the towel, stepped towards the back door. “Obviously! Now go swim before someone wanders over here asking for a turn.” Nick’s indignant noises just made him laugh again and they waved at each other before turning to enjoy their respective activities.

Chapter Text

Grabbing a towel, Nick scoffed, “What was the point again of splurgeing on a bungalow at THIS resort if you’re just gonna spend the whole time under here?!”

Charlie leaned back with his trademark leer before throwing his arms out wide and exclaiming extravagantly, “Oh, but the nude beach is just so perfect for my Sun King!”

Nick snorted and shook his head as he glanced around this stretch of beach and idly dried off. The cabanas you can reserve are spaced apart for, he assumed, privacy reasons but they hadn’t… taken full advantage of that… yet.

He turned back to appreciate Charlie’s pale flesh, fully on display to his credit, lying back on the cushioned chaise in the shade. They had been liveing in that bubble where they pretended nobody else exists but Nick was suddenly hyperaware of the various men walking up and down this part of the resort.

He chewed on his bottom lip and his head swung back and forth as he contemplated his next move. Charlie had returned his attention to his book and Nick took a minute to review their recent… activities. His husband’s refractory period was different from his and, even on their honeymoon, a factor Nick always respected and weighed. He shrugged; foreplay was always fun too…

Haveing made up his mind, he threw the towel down and grabbed the arms of the empty lounger. Charlie’s eyebrows darted up dramatically as he watched Nick wrestle it through a turn of 180 degrees. The privacy of that seat therefore increased somewhat as it was now facing into the covered structure - it satisfied his personal threshold. Now he would see if it met Charlie’s needs…

He set the back of this one at a gentler angle than the other’s and then slid behind his husband. Bending over, he nuzzled his way into the side of Charlie’s head. He stayed there, gently rumbling, for a few minutes, listening to his beloved turn the pages.

Then he turned and found the cool skin with his mouth. Kissing and nibbleing his way from one cheekbone and down the neck and across the back and to the other temple, he made sure Charlie had time to transition mentally out of his book. When he saw it fall closed, he leaned into the delicate shell of an ear and murmured, “I have a list of tiny choices for you, love.”

The blue eyes snapped back open and the curly head turned to crane up at him as he straightened so he stepped over to drop his butt onto the edge of the other chaise. He gathered the near hand in his own and took a moment to let all his love and lust fill his eyes. He saw the banked fire ignite in his husband’s face.

He licked his lips and let his gaze wander from lips to chest to hands to eyes as he talked. “So… I know we’ve had a few days to learn how this place works and get comfortable walking around naked and… I thought we might be ready to push out of our comfort zone again… a little more… but only if you want to!”

Now he let his eyes lock onto Charlie’s because he never wanted any reluctant agreement. “Like always! I only want to do what you absolutely want to do too.” In return, he got a wry smile and a small nod.

He wrinkled his nose. “Okay, here goes.” He took a deeper breath. “Number one. I wondered if you might want to trade seats with me and I’ll tuck myself over there,” he glanced to one side where the back of the cabana was a little dimmer, “and suck you off.” Charlie pulled his lips in, eyes twinkleing.

Nick smirked and shifted his grip on the cool, lean hand sandwiched in his warm ones. “Two… we could go back to our slightly more private yard and you could pound me into one of those chaises…” Now he got a raised eyebrow. He felt his face break into a grin.

“Three, if semi-public sex isn’t working for you at all, that’s totally cool,” he paused and waited for Charlie’s approveing blink that he should continue, “then maybe you’d like a scene in our room where…,” his breath hitched, “you power bottom somehow because… it’s been a while and…,” he wiggled his hips, “I always fucking love that.”

He drew his lips into a hard line, blew a sharp breath out his nose and tried to still his fidgeting hands while he waited for that beautiful brain to sort through all the needs, wants, desires, worries and expectations. All of a sudden, Charlie’s face lit up. “YES!”

He chuckled, a little shocked. “Ummmm…”

Charlie put his book back on the small stack behind him and stood up. Drawing Nick up with his hands and then down into a kiss, he repeated, “yes,” just as their lips met. They lingered there, turning and slotting their mouths together in a leisurely way. Then Nick felt his lower lip being dragged by Charlie’s teeth and he gasped.

The smaller man drew back, eyes half-lidded. He pushed a curl out of his face and glanced around before stepping past Nick and sinking down onto the other lounger’s cushions. He spread his legs and patted the space in between them.

Nick hopped to it, folding his body awkwardly on top of the chair and into the space defined by the slopeing back of the curved canvas structure. His face hovered above Charlie’s torso, one hand playing with a narrow hip. The dazzleing eyes looked down at him and the knobby fingers came up to play with Nick’s hair.

“Yes, start with this one and then yes we’ll do those too.” His smile was knowing, intense, proud. Nick felt his insides contract and his eyelids flutter. He noticed the fingers start to dig into his scalp and push him down. His cock twitched as he bent and began to lick stripes along Charlie’s groin.

As he played there and brought the olive-toned dick to full rigidity, his body matched the progress of its own volition. He shifted his lower half so it curled more comfortably onto the available space, turning him into an S shape coiled in Charlie’s lap.

“Deep throat me,” came out quiet but firm and he bent further, widening and opening and swallowing and breatheing. The hand in his hair taught him the desired rhythm and his mind went blank with it. He was groaning and whimpering and slurping freely when he felt Charlie’s other hand slam down on his own where it had been flailing along the toned flank.

He felt digits circle his wrist and squeeze; it sent currents of electricity to his cock and he shuddered from head to toe. The hand in his hair pulled him off with a few tugs and then pushed him lower and he happily lapped at his husband’s balls and perineum, shifting backwards as needed but leaving his one hand trapped.

“Lips and teeth!” sounded more desperate than before and he shot up to comply, first rubbing his closed, wet mouth all over the most sensitive zone around Charlie’s tip and then pulling his lips back so the flat fronts of his teeth could add a hard sensation to the overwhelm he hoped to be causeing.

Charlie’s gasps and moans had him vibrateing. He kept alternateing lips and teeth until his hair was tugged with intention once more and he leaned up and then bent down, engulfing the full shaft again. He hummed and suctioned and swirled his tongue.

He fell back gasping at one point but made sure the hand tucked half under his torso immediately bent over to spread his spit around and keep the stimulation flowing. He risked a glance up and saw Charlie watching him. He grinned and saw a flash of something fierce in those tempest-tossed eyes.

The hand on his head slid down into the short hairs at the base of his skull and yanked him to one side, an angle which exposed his jugular. Charlie curled forward and kissed him, hard and demanding. The other hand dragged him by the wrist until they both encountered his own cock.

Charlie’s tongue was down his throat and his dick just got brushed and Nick felt his back arching uncontrollably. Charlie crashed back onto the cushion and pulled the older man’s face right up against his leaking cock. Then both his hands flew up in the air, elbows bent and low, fingers wide. It screamed “I’m all yours now” and Nick bent back to work, licking and sucking.

“Bring us both home, Nelson,” floated down, hoarse and dark. He took that as permission to grasp his own member, thumb automatically sliding up and around to capture and smear all his pre-cum into usefulness. Soon his head and his hand were synchronized blurs and then he was spilling and sputtering and striveing to maintain the pace of it when he felt both of Charlie’s hands on his skull, driveing him back into a frenzy until he was gulping and moaning for entirely different reasons.

As they each transitioned from convulsions and incoherent utterances into something more breathy and less loud, they heard appreciative giggles fadeing away and a quiet yet emphatic “NICE” as punctuation. They both bent further away from the open cabana front and any other passersby, embarrassed chuckles escapeing them as they clung to each other.

Nick flopped his head onto Charlie’s abdomen and enjoyed the way one lean hand returned to kneading the base of his skull. He closed his eyes and drifted there, the messy hand falling lightly onto his own thigh.

Later when they sat on towels at the outdoor dining area near the taverna for an early dinner, Nick asked, “So the One doesn’t want to say Spring-Nelson now?” He tried to sound flippant but he was genuinely curious. Charlie snorted and shook his head.

“Nah. Getting married didn’t change anything for him. He already knew you’re his.” Nick felt a shimmer in his groin. He swallowed thickly.

He leaned forward and Charlie sat back instead of taking the next bite of his tomato cucumber salad. Nick laid his hand on top of Charlie’s forearm. He let his eyes drift up slowly to lock onto his husband’s and paused there a long moment. “Yours.” The generous mouth rolled and then quirked up on one side. The dark head nodded. “Yours, Charlie. Body and mind and soul.” He nodded again, slower. “Forever.” They both smiled, slideing the atmosphere from intense back into breathable, all warm and tingly.

Charlie bent his arm and captured Nick’s hand with his own so he could bring it to his lips. “Forever,” he transmuted the word with his soft kisses. It was profound yet also prosaic. The wedding had cemented them legally but otherwise nothing much changed for them. They knew they had so much time to enjoy each other, a lifetime’s worth, a string of golden moments stretching out ahead of them.

The next day started with a blowie for Nick and breakfast in the yard. They actually got dressed and managed a hike along the cliff tops above the resort before returning for a sensual soak in the hot tub. Charlie moved away before it could turn into more. “I have plans for you,” he tutted and Nick took a deep breath instead of whingeing.

After another early dinner, this time in their own little kitchenette whilst watching the latest funny videos going around their socials, Charlie lead him into the bedroom and pulled some items out of a pocket inside their suitcase. Nick recognized the black booty shorts and rainbow bathing suit from last year’s Pride; apparently Charlie had tucked them away for special occasions.

He looked up, a shy smile on his face. “Is it danceing night then?” Charlie grinned and nodded at him. Nick hummed and shrugged. “Okay but you’re buying me lots of cocktails.” Charlie swept his arms around his neck and pulled him down for a kiss.

Holding his head in range, the plummy lips were soon trailing across his cheek and under his ear and down his neck. Nick gasped and pulled the narrow hips closer. “Are you sure you want to go out, love?” Charlie giggled softly against his collarbone.

“Yes, I’m sure. I’m going to show you off again and, this time, I don’t care if you sport a stiffy all night. I’m gonna make you earn that pounding in the yard you wanted.” Nick nearly bent in half as all that was muttered in his ear.

“JESUS CHRIST, CHAR!” His husband just skittered away from him, cackleing, and scooped up his outfit. As he started to pull it on, his eyes darkened, overtly stareing at where Nick’s cock had, in fact, begun to engorge as he thought about the evening Charlie promised.

He turned his back as he wiggled the shorts up over his bum, shakeing it at a still motionless Nick. He looked over his shoulder flirtatiously and caught his husband licking his lips, one hand hovering tentatively near his own hip.

“Nope! None of that! You’re saveing it up for me!” Charlie stepped into him and swatted the hand away. Then he slid his own hands onto his lover’s face, reveling in the soft beard there. He tilted his head. “You’re looking a little shaggy, dear; let’s fix that before you get dressed.” He turned the broad shoulders and pushed him in the direction of the bathroom, giving the juicy bum a little slap as it moved away.

He had Nick sit on the edge of the tub platform and lean back. He dug the electric trimmer out of their kit and made short work of it. The taller man stood, rubbed his face and brushed off his chest. He grabbed Charlie as he finished putting the grooming tool down and pulled him close, bending his knees to cup the pert butt with his still-naked groin. He rocked their pelvises together where they could watch in the mirror.

The blue eyes roamed up and down their reflection and the smile was possessive, even arrogant. Nick thought it was sexy as hell, the way the One shone through more often. His husband confident and unapologetically in charge did things to his heart and… other body parts.

His hands began to leave the narrow hips, one snakeing up the torso to clutch at the far pec and the other tilting ever so slightly inward as his lips found the spot just below the curls and behind an ear. Charlie moaned and leaned back into it.

They swayed there a minute and Nick’s lower hand was just starting to make contact with the growing bulge when Charlie cleared his throat and stepped away. “Come on, you brat. Time to get dressed.”

He had black tank tops and body glitter for them as well. Nick’s was golden and Charlie applied it liberally to his cheeks, shoulders and biceps. His own was silvery and he made sure to spread it in alluring swoops from his forehead, down each temple and slightly onto his jawline. Then he trailed it down his neck and across both collarbones.

Nick watched all this silently, his nostrils flareing and his swimsuit tightening. His fingers bent and relaxed, bent and relaxed.

Charlie wiped his hands off again and turned to grasp the sides of Nick’s face. “Yes, simmer for me, pet. I want all your lust and jealousy bubbleing up tonight.” The blue eyes were magnetic, demanding. “I want you preening and pranceing. I want every person there tonight to know why I chose you and that you chose me. Got it?” Nick licked his lips and nodded, eyes riseing and falling between the hypnotic gaze and the smirking mouth.

Charlie took his hand and lead them over to the door where they kept the pink flip flops they’d been wearing outside. They walked over to the main building hand in hand, Nick aware of butterflies in his belly unlike what he’d felt before their wedding and entirely unlike the sated sensation Charlie had gifted him before last year’s Pride. He felt unmoored in the best way and he looked over at the handsome man who was causing it all.

Charlie’s return glance was knowing, pleased, brief. They quickly found the dance club, flashed their resort wristbands to get in and again to pay for their first drinks. They found a corner table, high with no stools, and leaned there pressing their sides together as they drank and took in their surroundings.

The club was just filling in at this point in the evening. People of all states of dress were mingleing freely. Almost all men, almost all well-muscled and athletic like they had seen on the beach. Nick worked on NOT sucking in his stomach; the knowledge that Charlie loved him just the way he was helped quite a bit.

The younger man dragged him back to the bar for another round, pulling Nick’s arms around him so his large frame ended up drapeing over his slender one like a jacket. He wiggled there while they waited and Nick moaned and then started chewing on his shoulder. The bartender smirked as he served them and Charlie smiled proudly before leading Nick out onto the dance floor.

They held their drinks in one hand and socketed together with the other locked onto each other’s hip. It wasn’t crowded yet and Charlie had found the one pocket of non-conforming gays to dance near. They lost themselves in the music and each other.

Charlie kept the cycle going until Nick was uncareing when the floor became packed. His focus remained on one man alone - the legs muscled from running, the arms toned from drumming, every well-known feature of his face made new by those smears of silver. Charlie’s neck and shoulders were showing golden bits by now as well as Nick couldn’t stop burying his face into him every time that rear end pushed back against him.

Nick was buzzing from more than the alcohol and he shook his head when Charlie offered another round. He dug his fingers into the angular hipbones and growled into the upraised face. “Want.” The dark head nodded.

“I can tell,” he murmured and let one hand brush past the erection which had been forming and subsiding all evening. Nick lurched forward at the touch but Charlie just pulled him into another sway, hands on the broad hips. Nick raised his arms to Charlie’s shoulders and leaned his forehead down until it met the curly head.

“WANT.” He was growling and vibrateing. Charlie just smiled and danced, coaxing the larger man into wilder and wilder movements. Song after song carried them away from inhibitions and insecurities. They gyrated and sweat poured off them as the press of other bodies made the room more stifleing. Nick was starting to sober up enough to notice how much those other bodies pressed and his limbs became looser still, createing a small bubble around the two of them. At some point, they each used their tank tops to mop up the sweat and then dropped them onto a nearby table.

They never drifted far apart. A few times, someone tried to join their sway but Nick would quickly turn Charlie into him or wrap himself around the smaller frame again. He minded what his husband had said earlier and wasn’t shy about showing when his hackles were up.

Finally he called a time out for a trip to the loo. Charlie nodded and followed him there. People were definitely getting busy in some of the stalls and corners but they both emptied their bladders and then grinned sloppily at each other in the mirror as they washed up.

Nick was turning from the rubbish bin when he heard the door open and the thub thub thub of the beat from the DJ roll into the bathroom again. Just then there was a gasp and then a singsongy “hey” followed quickly on. He saw a young man, wearing only a neon green elastic harness, makeing eyes at Charlie. Before he knew what he was doing, he had swooped over and stepped in between them.

He let his eyes blaze. “He chose me. Go on then.” He felt Charlie’s hands slide around his stomach and he turned before he could even register the other man’s reaction. “Can we please leave now?” he whined and Charlie waggled his chin up at him, considering the request. Nick took the tip of his tongue and placed it between his teeth, pulling his lips back to show Charlie how patient he was being. He got a smirk and one hand rubbing his arm in return. He moaned quietly, deep in his throat.

Charlie took in the gorgeous puppy dog he was lucky to call his own. So eager to please. He felt the flames licking up his insides and gauged how much more edgy foreplay they could each endure; he wanted their time in the bungalow’s yard to be explosively brief else he might shrivel from nerves.

Finding the right level of discomfort was something Cliff encouraged him to do but they hadn’t talked about it in a sexual context in some time. A wank with sunscreen was one thing, easily moved indoors; lying down and getting inside someone took time and was more challengeing to disengage.

He licked his lips and watched his husband tremble as a result. He reached out and pulled Nick with him until his own back was against a wall, his hand tugging at the front of the rainbow swimsuit unsurprisingly effective. He reached into his guts and found the steel core there, allowing it to rise up behind his eyes again, molten and liquid.

Nick’s eyes had already been locked on his but now his knees wobbled and he started sinking to the floor. Charlie let him, the part of his mind screaming about the other people going by and the unhygienic nature of it all getting drowned out by the roar of the flames leaping up at the vision of his husband melting as a direct result of a simple look.

Nick swayed on his knees and Charlie let the hand that had been at his waist drift towards his mouth. Nick’s lips parted and he darted forward to engulf the three middle fingers. Charlie closed his eyes and let the sensations travel up his arm and down into his cock.

He heard the large man’s moans clearly even with the noise of the club and he opened his eyes to find the honey-coloured orbs still locked on his own face. He smiled, a crook of one corner of his mouth, and straightened his spine. His head lolled to one side and then stretched into a full circular motion.

He bent his fingers as their eyes reconnected, dragging Nick even closer, and then turned his wrist so the fingers fell out of the swollen lips and his thumb could snag at them. Then that hand slid around and into the short hairs at the back of Nick’s neck where he pulled the other man’s face into his belly. The light-haired head immediately nuzzled there. The beard tickled and roughed him up, both delicious and both adding to the tension coiling inside his pelvis.

Nick started to nuzzle lower, rubbing his forehead into a hipbone. Charlie dropped his hands to his sides and let his husband explore, seeing where their boundaries were, here by the towel dispenser. Across the room, someone in a stall was reaching their climax and not hideing it very well. Charlie let that atmosphere fuel his curiosity.

Turned out they both were okay with a nose graze from side to side across a very rigid and still-clothed cock and that was about it. As the stranger cried out again and again, Nick looked up at him, panting and hungry. Charlie stepped to one side and held out his hand. Nick took it and rose up so the dark-haired man could lead him into the night.

Tripping over each other as they maximized bodily contact all the way back to their semi-private space, they ended up giggleing as much as moaning. Charlie felt all the right tingles across his flesh, the slight chill in the midnight air of mid-summer adding to the frisson of the moment.

As they crossed the threshold and entered their back patio, it only took one glance for Charlie to confirm it was in fact their space. Next to one of the chaise lounges was their canister of lube and some towels, tucked discreetly where nobody would notice it if they had walked by when it was still light. He smiled to himself, proud of his overthinking brain, always prepared.

He lead Nick to the seat and they kissed there, hands becoming even more free now they were truly alone. Very quickly, both asses had been squeezed and rubbed and pulled until their fronts were smashed together perfectly tightly. Charlie bent his arms so Nick’s swimsuit began to roll down where his wrist had been inside the waistband.

Nick pulled back half a step and yanked it the rest of the way off before kicking it away with his feet, leaveing his shoes to one side in the process. Charlie openly stared at him as the edges of light from distant lamp poles made lines flicker on his skin, the shadows danceing there but not camouflageing his erection comeing back to full mast. Charlie felt his nostrils flareing and his fingers clenching.

He pushed forward into Nick’s space, one hand reaching under the thigh closest to the chaise and pulling so Nick lifted his foot onto the cushions and then the other hand pulling his head down firmly into more ravenous kisses. He let the first hand return to gropeing everywhere he could reach, from the back of that knee across the bottom of the trembling thigh and then slideing up in between them to graze against the cock already leaking pre-cum. He didn’t linger there, his hand moveing on to circle the hip and cup the ass cheek again, pulling them closer once more.

After working them both up into a frenzy again, Charlie pulled back, his belly wet from Nick rubbing there. “Stay like this,” he growled and then leaned over to grab a towel, throw it over the cushion and open the canister. He heard Nick’s breath catch and he smiled to himself again. He pushed back into the strong arms and let the full lips descend on his own, his attention fully on the lubed-up hand sneaking its way under the raised leg and in between the quivering glutes.

Nick flung his head back and arched his torso away from the awkward angle he’d been in. Charlie wasted no time driveing in and makeing him whimper, his whole body shuddering as he was prepped.

Charlie’s free hand had been inside his own shorts and he leaned his forehead against the broad chest as he assessed their readiness. Both of them had instinctively been stifleing their sounds and nobody seemed to be nearby. Charlie felt the sparks of worry around his lungs and he watched them a moment, trying to find the glowing edge of Just Enough discomfort which meant growth.

As he watched, the sparks settled into him, igniting the air he was breatheing and sizzleing down into his abdomen to stoke the fire of his libido. His cock jumped in his hand. He tuned back into Nick’s noises. Yes, they were ready.

He pushed off and pulled his shorts down, not careing how the lube wiped off on them, too lost in his lust. “Make me wet,” he rasped; he huffed in delight at how eagerly Nick bent to take him into his hot mouth. He closed his eyes and enjoyed the sensations for a time, the expert swirling and grazeing of teeth he especially liked. Nick paused and then engulfed him once more to spread the saliva he’d gathered. As he straightened up, Charlie could see a trail of it stretching between them, gleaming from the distant lamplight.

“Good job,” he murmured, Nick pulseing visibly at the words. “Lie down.” The large man hopped to comply. Charlie pulled his shorts all the way off but kept his shoes on as he straddled the lounger. Spreading the freckled cheeks with his hands, he managed to sink fully into Nick fairly quickly, both of them gasping at first contact.

Charlie pulled in his lips and paused the beat of one shaky inhale exhale cycle; Nick was already nodding and pushing back at him. The strong runner’s legs began to lift and drop, slowly and then faster. Both of them grunting and curseing quietly, Charlie shifted and found new angles, useing different muscle groups every few minutes so he didn’t wear out too quickly from the effort.

One last shift and Nick got louder, more desperate, more feral. Charlie was spurred on by it, feeling his horizon. “Fuck yeah, babe,” he panted, “take my cock.” Nick whined and wiggled under him. “You take it so good, pet.” The light-haired head was back, throat open, noises unhinged. “Mine! MINE! Mi… HNNNNNNNGH!”

Charlie fought to keep moveing through a long intense climax, faintly registering Nick’s release seemed to be following his own. He was vaguely grateful the friction had been enough for his responsive man once again. He patted a dewy mound fondly as he finally slid out and wobbled back to a standing position.

“Come on, babe. Shower time.” Nick gulped at the air and pushed himself up, even more limp-limbed than Charlie by all appearances. The dark-haired man scooped up the supplies and followed Nick in the slideing door.

The warm water poured down on them where they had collapsed into each other’s arms. After several minutes just rubbing against the larger man in an affectionate haze, Charlie grabbed the soap and made some progress on actually cleaning them up. The tender bits were de-lubed, the glitter was scrubbed, the rest was rinsed. He deemed that good enough and turned off the flow.

Nick stepped out first and handed him a bath sheet before throwing another over his own head, rubbing vigorously there a few moments and tying it around his waist. “My turn,” he murmured as he grabbed one of the special towels Charlie brought for his haircare and carefully laid it on the soaking wet curls. The younger man hummed an inquisitive sound. “To take care of you, silly,” came the husky reply as Nick dropped his hands to Charlie’s wrap and tenderly wiped him down. Finally he leaned in and kissed his temple then carefully pulled the fabric off the dark head.

Setting it aside for a moment, he picked up Charlie’s after-shower cream and took a small amount; he spread that across his palms and started rakeing it through the ringlets. Charlie moaned and melted against him. Nick smiled sleepily down at his husband and draped the special towel around his curls again.

They each finished drying off, Charlie wrapping up with some meticulously placed scrunches along the top of his head. Glanceing in the mirror, he saw Nick watching him. “You’ve been paying attention to my haircare,” he said shyly. Nick nodded and raised a hand to lightly stroke against the back of his neck.

“I love your curls; you know that.” They leaned towards each other, arms languidly wrapping around torsos. Charlie tilted up and kissed him softly. Nick eased off his mouth and rubbed their noses together.

“Let’s go to bed,” the younger man whispered and, takeing his hand, lead him to the other room where they spooned up and drifted off soon enough.

On their last full day at the resort, Charlie had gotten up early and, leaveing a note, slipped out to walk over to a local market for fresh fruit and pastries. By the time Nick woke up and emerged from the water closet, he was back and spreading out their feast in the kitchenette. They spent a leisurely hour or so hand-feeding each other and laughing at how sappy they felt.

Then Charlie drew a bath whilst the older man went out for a run (wearing trackies!), after which they soaked together in the hot tub a long time, long enough for the dark-haired man to put Nick through his paces twice. When he offered to reciprocate - after the blowjob that almost made him fall over, after Charlie got out to grab more fruit to dangle into his open mouth, after the delightfully drawn out edge-tastic handjob that finally forced them both into their towels, draining the tub and thanking it for its service this whole vacation - each time, Charlie would just smile and shake his head.

“Tonight… my turn… tonight,” he eventually whispered into the side of the strawberry blonde head. They were donning their robes and planning to walk over for a couple’s massage in the spa. Nick felt himself flush across his whole torso but luckily he was still sated from the tub. As he straightened up from working out a knot in the belt, he turned into his husband’s back and wrapped his arms around the narrow waist.

He growled his approval of this plan into the silky skin of Charlie’s neck and felt the younger man lean back against his front, sighing happily. They stood there a few beats, relishing a simple touch, the way their bodies always fit together so well.

The masseuses were skillful and had both of them feeling boneless so they wobbled back to the bungalow and took a long nap, Charlie tucked into Nick’s shoulder blades. Then they got room service includeing a bottle of champers since they were celebrateing the end of their honeymoon.

Finally it was time for Charlie to reveal his desires. After they’d puttered and packed, he grabbed one of the broad hands in his and drew him next to the bed, the canister of lube already open on the nightstand next to a clean washcloth. They both stripped off their pants and Nick took the curly head in his hands, just looking down into the eyes which seemed deeper and more beautiful every time he saw them.

Charlie smiled, letting him stare as long as he liked, rubbing himself against the larger frame slowly, delicately. His hands were gentle on Nick’s chest, just resting there, content. Finally the taller man leaned down for a lingering kiss, tender, attentive.

Turning his face, Nick began fluttering more kisses down the jaw and neck, avoiding the ticklish ears. His hands traveled down the slender body. Charlie moaned quietly.

“What…,” kiss, “do you,” kiss, “want, dear?”

Charlie let his hands fall to Nick’s waist and swayed in his arms. He let his head drop back as Nick reached his chest. “This…,” he breathed, “your mouth… everywhere…” Nick hummed encourageingly. “Swallow me… open me…,” he gasped as the light-haired man traded sides, “eat me out… then fuck me…”

Nick growled then and pulled back just enough to scoop up his husband and lie him down on the bed. He crawled on top of him, braceing with both arms long enough to look fiercely into the beloved face once more. “I’m going to worship you, darling. I’m going to make you feel so good.” His head dropped and he licked a stripe up the side of the neck he’d so far ignored.

Charlie’s voice oscillated between breathy whimpers and feral barks as Nick made good on his promise. His mouth was everywhere. Lapping at the abdominal muscles, swirling the pre-cum off Charlie’s cock, marking up the inner thighs, gently pushing at each testicle, swallowing the full length and finally absolutely devouring his back door.

All of it directed and encouraged and corrected by that oscillateing voice. It was sharp orders and desperate pleas. It was loud. It was quiet. The rugby player heard and responded to every syllable.

At one point, Nick looked up, mouth wide and wet. “The One talks a lot more these days.” Charlie lifted his head and glanced down, eyebrows drawn. “Oh, don’t worry; he’s still fucking hot.” The blue eyes blinked. Nick shrugged. “I like it.” He smiled a bit nervously then. “I like knowing exactly what you want.”

The dark head fell back. “I want you…” one hand fell dramatically onto his face, “to FUCK me.” He lifted his neck and peered through his fingers. “NOW.” Nick huffed affectionately and scrambled to his knees.

“Yes, sir!”

Sigh. “That’s not my name.” … Gasp.

Grunt. Synchronized exhales.

Heartbeats.

“Move already!”

Nick chuckled; then something fierce brushed over his face and he grabbed the wiry legs and bent them under his torso, heels on his shoulders. Widening his own knees, he left his hands wrapped tightly around each ankle and began to rock his pelvis. The man under him was left breathless, moaning in staccato bursts as he was filled like he asked.

All the primeing, all the planning he saw Charlie do all day - it was working. Nick felt it in the way the other man arched and pushed against him, already panting hard. He felt it in the way his own lust was stretched out, like hot taffy, like something he could savor instead of the volcanic upheaval it normally was. He shook himself and applied his gratitude to the task at hand.

He pounded.

Charlie cried out, again and again. He bent more and more with each wave of pleasure. Nick’s body was practically horizontal once more, the legs between them drawing ever closer to the bed. The brown eyes found the blue and the sandy brows quirked, a wordless need.

The knobby fingers unclenched from the duvet and the lean hands snaked up to wrap around the wide throat. Charlie placed his thumbs just above Nick’s Adam’s apple and the fair head dropped into the pressure.

The freckled face grew redder, the sounds intensified between them. A litany of groans and curse words and grunts and a gurgle before Nick lifted away from the tightness and redoubled his efforts. Until they both were crying out, Charlie’s hand falling into the tiny gap opening up as Nick fell back, movements choppy but not stopping.

They arched. They whimpered. They slowed. They breathed. They made eye contact once again, watery and shaky and replete and full of love. Nick leaned down and found the plummy lips with his own; they stuttered through endless kisses as the bodyquakes rolled on.

Finally the larger man pulled himself onto one arm and grabbed the washcloth. “Dry ok?” Charlie nodded and took it to wipe down both their bellies. Then Nick slowly backed away, reclaimed it and went to replace it with one wet and warm. When he returned, he carefully and loveingly cleaned Charlie all up, leaveing kisses scattered all over the olive flesh.

Then he went and cleaned himself up before returning to flop on the bed where Charlie promptly turned, pulled the duvet over both of them and slid into his arms. Nick hummed softly and rubbed his beard into the sable curls. “That seemed to work well, yeah?” The dark head nodded. “It was incredible for me,” he rasped.

“Well,” Charlie murmured, nuzzleing deeper into Nick’s side, “you did say you wanted me to power bottom.” He planted a kiss on the nearest collarbone. “So there you go. List complete.”

Nick chuckled softly at that. “As if our lists will ever really be completed!” he protested quietly. Charlie just hummed and shifted slightly, already mostly asleep. The taller man laid there, stareing at the ceiling, partly reviewing the scene as they had taught themselves to do, checking for issues that needed further negotiations. Partly lost in a jumble of thoughts which were only now starting to form shapes.

Nick wondered again at what had shifted between them over the last year or so. What it was doing to him, the way Charlie was stepping into a more assertive role in their life together. He shivered, a pleasant ripple working its way from his hips up to his shoulders. The curly head pressed in tighter against his chest and he tightened his arms before gently kissing the top of it.

In some ways, this “new” Charlie was just the one he originally fell in love with, all intelligence and cheek and strength. This Charlie wasn’t hideing all that so often anymore. No, Nick decided, the new thing wasn’t Charlie; it was a part of himself.

The part of him who had always wanted to take care of someone was makeing more room for the part of himself who got to be tiny and unsure. A part of himself who gladly followed orders and didn’t have to have all the answers.

Give and take, he knew that had been part of their wedding vows. That they would be partners and equals was never a question. But it was becomeing a more visible, tangible dynamic all the time. For a moment, he saw all the decades ahead as the chance to meet a new Charlie and new parts of himself over and over again. It was dizzying and it soon passed.

He took a deep breath, careful to keep it slow and not disturb his husband. This was not the end of their honeymoon; it was the beginning of the rest of their lives.

Chapter Text

May Year 1: Tiny Choices Plan forms in Chapter One.
June Year 1: Pants Relief Plan forms in Chapter Two flashback.
August Year 1: Charlie asks Nick to figure out how to help him let go enough to orgasm together in Chapter Two.
September Year 1: Nick turns 18.
October Year 1: Nick experiments with Domming Charlie while they make out and grind in the parked car scene in Chapter Three.
November Year 1: Nick is fully naked for the first time (aka the Sun King) in Chapter Five.
December Year 1: Mid-month, Nick Doms Charlie, palming him through his trousers, in the art museum bathroom in Chapter Three. Then Nick gives Charlie the soft button-downs for Christmas and starts the Duke in Shadows fairytale in Chapter Eight.

February Year 2: Nick’s attempt at Domming Charlie at the cinema fails when Charlie says no to daddy kink in Chapter Four.
March Year 2: Nick Doms Charlie while hikeing with clothed frottage and Charlie orgasms in front of him for the first time; Charlie then promptly gives Nick a blowjob. All in Chapter Four.
April Year 2: Charlie turns 17.
May Year 2: Nick Doms Charlie while Charlie gives him a blowjob and then helps him orgasm in front of Nick again in Chapter Six; this is the first instance of the Reporting for Duty military kink.
June Year 2: Nick graduates from Truham.
July Year 2: Nick and Charlie 69 in Menorca which is the first time Charlie has let Nick give him a blowjob; Charlie is fully comfortable with an open shirt in private. All in chapter Six.
August Year 2: At the end of Chapter Six, they are practiceing full-on frontal frottage and Charlie Doms Nick, requesting a blowjob, for the first time.
September Year 2: Nick turns 19 and starts uni.
October Year 2: Cadet Nelson gives Corporal Charlie a wedgie in the train station bathroom during a blowjob in Chapter Nine.
December Year 2: Charlie lets Nick touch his scars (Chapter Eight) and they take a bath together during the first weekend Charlie has been fully and casually naked. They both admit they want to try anal but Charlie says he needs Nick’s help again to get out of his own way. Most of this is in Chapter Nine.

February Year 3: Charlie visits Nick at uni; they have a fancy date out with boutonnières and then Nick Doms Charlie to try spanking and anal fingering, all in Chapter Ten.
April Year 3: Charlie turns 18.
May Year 3: Charlie visits Nick at uni again and Nick Doms him with handcuffs and edgeing and their first anal sex (Chapter Ten). Then Charlie initiates anal again, includeing Domming Nick into the cuffs the next day in his first power bottom move, as well as their first foray into chokeing (Chapter Eleven). Nick makes his own list of things he wants Charlie to do to him.
June Year 3: Charlie discusses the part of him who will become the One in Black with Geoff (Chapter Twelve) and graduates from Truham.
July Year 3: They return to Menorca and Charlie is shirtless in the pool for the first time (Chapter Eight); Charlie also stands up to David and Doms Nick to try rimming for the first time before they peruse sex toys together (Chapter Twelve).
August Year 3: They move in together in Chapter Twelve.
September Year 3: Nick turns 20 and bottoms for the first time, includeing rejecting the lip-shaped gag they bought (Chapters Five and Twelve); Charlie starts uni and therapy with Cliff.
October Year 3: Charlie buys greasepaint in Chapter Fourteen because the One in Black is starting to emerge.
November Year 3: Nick power bottoms for the first time in Chapter Fifteen.
December Year 3: They discover Nick quite likes Charlie wearing the lip-shaped gag (referenced but not shown in Chapter Twenty-One).

February Year 4: Charlie Doms and tops Nick with more chokeing in Chapter Fifteen.
April Year 4: Charlie turns 19.
May Year 4: Charlie talks in therapy (Chapter Sixteen) and to Nick (Chapter Seventeen) about the One in Black.
July Year 4: Nick and Charlie have sex against a wall for the first time (Chapter Eighteen), setting up the need for Nick’s endurance training regime in Chapter Seven.
September Year 4: Nick turns 21.
December Year 4: Nick and Charlie go to a dance club in Chapter Nineteen.

March Year 5: Charlie helps organize a protest in Chapter Nineteen.
April Year 5: Charlie turns 20.
June Year 5: Nick and Charlie are at a dance club when the One Doms Nick into a blowjob in the bathroom (Chapter Nineteen).
September Year 5: Nick turns 22.
November Year 5: Charlie joins a band called the Clectics (Chapter Twenty).
December Year 5: Charlie’s band plays at a pub and Nick flirts with the One afterwards (Chapter Twenty).

February Year 6: Nick and Charlie attend their first trivia night at their local pub, the Hearth (Chapter Thirteen).
April Year 6: Charlie turns 21.
May Year 6: The One in Black fully emerges in greasepaint and a corset in Chapter Twenty. Charlie talks to Cliff about it and finally accepts what the One is doing for his assertiveness in Chapter Twenty-One.
June Year 6: Nick graduates uni (yes, it turns out he should have done this a year earlier in the UK system but it’s fanfic and I am not British so just roll with it please) and gets a job where he travels often; he inspects restaurants in a national chain and trains the staff who run them.
September Year 6: Nick turns 23.
October Year 6: Charlie worries about Nick burning out while on the road and they brainstorm solutions includeing bedtime phone sex and Nick eating dinner out more often in Chapter Thirteen.

April Year 7: Charlie turns 22.
June Year 7: Charlie graduates uni and becomes an apprentice structural engineer.
September Year 7: Nick turns 24.

April Year 8: Charlie turns 23.
July Year 8: Charlie sort of makes a pillow fort in Chapter Twenty-Two.
September Year 8: Nick turns 25.

March Year 9: Nick meets a group of bottom-shameing gay men while on a business trip (Chapter Twenty-Three), comes home begging Charlie to top him (Chapter Twenty-Four) and then proposes without a ring before Charlie counter-proposes with a ring (Chapter Twenty-Five).
April Year 9: Nick gets Charlie his engagement ring as he turns 24 at the end of Chapter Twenty-Five.
May Year 9: Charlie promises the planning committee he and Nick will join the kink float at Pride in Chapter Twenty-Six.
June Year 9: The One in Black and his pet go to Pride; Nick starts growing his beard afterwards to obscure his face after their pro-kink interview goes viral. Chapters Twenty-Seven through Thirty-Two are the smutty build-up where the One drains his pet and Chapter Thirty-Three has the interview itself. Chapter Thirty-Four is Charlie’s copeing mechanism for the aftermath of the interview somewhat outing them as kinky.
September Year 9: Nick turns 26.

April Year 10: Charlie turns 25.
June Year 10: Their wedding in Chapter Thirty-Five with matching fan art in Chapter Thirty-Six.
July Year 10: Nick and Charlie go to a nude resort in the Greek isles for their honeymoon in Chapters Thirty-Seven and then the flashforward in Five becomes the first scene in Thirty-Eight.
September Year 10: Nick turns 27.

April Year 11: Charlie turns 26.
June Year 11: Charlie becomes an incorporated engineer.
August Year 11: Charlie gives Nick a blowjob in the art museum bathroom in Chapter Three’s flashforward.
September Year 11: Nick turns 28.

February Year 13: Charlie starts therapy with Steff after they just bought a house in Chapter Twenty-One.
April Year 13: Charlie turns 28.
September Year 13: Nick turns 30; they get Daisy as a puppy (Chapter Thirteen).
October Year 13: Nick confronts Chad the Dude Bro at the gym in Chapter Seven.

February Year 14: Nick, messaging all his rainbow friends on the train in Chapter Thirteen, has just applied for a Regional Manager job with the same company.
March Year 14: Nick gets the promotion and stops haveing to travel for work.
April Year 14: Charlie turns 29.
September Year 14: Nick turns 31.

April Year 15: Charlie turns 30.
July Year 15: Frances Isabella Spring-Nelson is born.
September Year 15: Nick turns 32.

April Year 17: Charlie turns 32.
September Year 17: Nick turns 34.
November Year 17: Luca Félice Spring-Nelson is born.

April Year 21: Charlie turns 36.
August Year 21: Flashforward in Chapter Eight to the Duke in Shadows as bath story time; Charlie is comfortable with Luca playing with his scars.