Archive of Our Own ^beta

Amy Santiago was never good at keeping lists. When she was six, she lost her list ranking all of her favourite teddies. When she was twelve, she lost her bucket list, so she had to rewrite it (which was probably for the best considering she wrote her bucket list when she was eight). When she was twenty six, she lost a list which contained the names of all the drug dealers that this perp she interrogated used. All of these, at the time, seemed pretty important and life changing lists to lose. But, in reality, they could all be replaced or remembered and rewritten with little consequence.

So, when Jake confronted her one day, with a small folded piece of lined paper, she wasn’t surprised. At the time, she was keeping around twenty different lists. And none of them would really impact Amy if Jake read them. Apart from one. And of course, this was the one Jake was holding.

You see, Amy Santiago never really fell in love. Sure, she had Teddy. But, she found out she never really loved him. So, one a rainy Saturday night, when Amy found out she loved Jake, she freaked out. She had a full on mental breakdown. And the only way for Amy to possibly think about it was to externalise it. So, Amy wrote down her feelings for Jake. And with that, she started the ‘101 reasons why l love Jake’ list. She added to it throughout the week, when he did little things for her like holding the door open or buying her coffee. Before she knew it, her 101 reasons had turned into 200 reasons and then 500 reasons. All of that, just confirmed to Amy that she loved Jake, which absolutely terrified and excited her at the same time.

Jake sat at his desk, staring at his computer, waiting for Amy to sit down. He was fiddling around with the paper and Amy knew, she was in trouble from the mischievous look on his face.
“Hey, Amy.” Jake said.
“Hey.” Amy said, looking at him suspiciously.
“I found one of your lists.” Jake paused and looked at Amy, giving her plenty of time to snatch it out of his hand, but she didn’t move at all.
“Oh yeah?” Amy said, trying to focus on her paperwork.
“101 reasons why l love Jake.” Jake read out, just loud enough for Amy to hear but quiet enough so no one else did. Amy froze. Heat radiated to her face as she felt her ears prick. Oh. No. This can’t be happening, she thought. Amy sprinted away from her desk to hide. She didn’t know where to go, she just wanted to get away. To escape. Finally, she stumbled her way into the evidence locker, where she slumped down next to a bag of cocaine and a box filled with files. Tears streamed down Amy’s face as she brought her knees up to her chin. She wished the ground would swallow her up. She wished that an asteroid would hit the earth which would blow it up. She wished that a storm would suddenly hit, destroying the precinct. All so she wouldn’t have to see Jake again. How could she feel this way over someone she loved?

The evidence locker door opened and Amy closed her eyes. She didn’t want anyone to see her like this. Especially him. But, the way Amy’s luck was that day, he had entered the room. Jake sat down in front of Amy and crossed his legs. He reached out to her and grabbed her hand and squeezed it, to let her know he was there. Reluctantly, she opened her eyes and saw him watching her in admiration. He smiled and took out the piece of paper.
“Reason 12: He makes me laugh.” Jake said, smiling and continued.
“Reason 72: I trust him more than anyone else in the world.”
“Reason 89: I love Jake, because he is funny, clumsy, sweet and caring. And no matter what, he is always Jake.”
“Reason 101: He’s perfect.” Jake said. He looked at Amy and wiped away the tears from her eyes with his thumb. He, then, moved the bag of cocaine to the side and sat next to her. “Out of all these reasons, this is the one l don’t believe. Because, my 101st reason for loving Amy Santiago is because she is perfect.”

With that, Jake lent over and kissed Amy. It was so slow and soft yet desperate and passionate at the same time. His hands pushed back any strands of hair that tried to interfere with their kiss and Amy rested her hands on his shoulders, playing with the bottom of his hair. Jake broke the kiss, with much protest from Amy and whispered in her ear, “You’re even better than perfect, Ames.” Amy blushed at his comment and the pair sat side by side, fingers intwined. Amy rested her head on his shoulder and Jake pressed a kiss to the top of her head.
“As much as l want to stay in his perfect moment forever,” Amy said, breaking the silence, “the city can’t save itself.”
“Ugh, well l suppose that this perfect moment should continue later tonight then. I’ll pick you up.” Jake told her.
“Real smooth, Peralta.” Amy said, chuckling.
“But it’s not a no.” Jake said, smiling.
“It’ll always be a yes.” Amy told him.
Jake kissed Amy again, and stood up.
“Duty calls.” Jake said, helping Amy up too.

The day passed very quickly from that point onward. Jake waited for Amy to finish up at the precinct and then couple walked to his house. They ordered a takeaway and spend most of the night kissing and cuddling on the couch, with Die Hard on in the background. It was the first time ever Amy saw Jake more interested in what was happening around him than he was interested in the film. And Amy felt so good being the reason why. Amy also did something that she doesn’t normally do, breaking a rule. And a rather important rule of not having sex on the first date. When she told Jake this afterwards, his eyes lit up and he had a proud smile came across his face.
“Calm down, Peralta.” Amy teased.
“Can’t help it!” Jake said, beaming.
The pair fell asleep, Jake’s head tucked into Amy’s neck, his arms over her body and their ankles and legs intwined.

Amy woke up the next morning and an immediate smile came across her face. Maybe she should lose lists more often if the consequences end like this. But Amy also has something else on her mind. What if someone found out? All the labels. All the teasing. She wasn’t sure she could handle it, especially because they had just started everything. And because of Charles. Sure, Charles is sweet but he can sometimes get… too personal when it comes to Jake. What if he found out about them? He would ask… questions. What if it makes what they have go bad?

A couple of minutes later, Jake stirred.
“You awake?” Amy asked.
“Mmh.” Came the response.
“You wanna shower together?” Amy asked.
What she said immediately perked Jake up. “Yeah sure.”
“Hey, l was thinking, and l know it’ll be hard but can we not tell anyone.” Amy asked him.
“Sure, do you want me to come in after you, so we don’t seem suspicious?” Jake asked.
“If that’s okay.” Amy admitted.
“Yeah, of course. Whatever you feel comfortable with.” Jake smiled.

After their daily briefing, in which Jake turned up halfway through (which made Amy feel bad), Amy returned to her desk. There was a slip of folded lined paper. She opened it up and it read, in the most scruffiest hand writing ever so Amy knew who it was from, 101 reasons why l love Amy.
And sure enough at reason 101 it said,
Reason 101: She’s perfect.
Amy looked down the page and saw that there was around 500 other reasons, which made her smile.
“You good, Amy?” Jake asked, smiling at Amy.
“Yep.” Amy said smiling back at him. Their smiles said so much and they both knew what each other was thinking. And from that moment on, Amy decided that she loved lists. And she loved losing them. Almost as much as she loved Jake. But not as much, because Amy was sure she could never love anything more than him. Because he was perfect.