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"I'm not so sure about this, Mav." Ice said, watching warily as the streets were filled with colors. Lots of colors.
"C'mon, Ice! It'll be fun," Maverick grabbed Ice’s hand, pulling him into the crowd. When Maverick suggested going to DC's pride parade, Ice wanted to say no. He really did. But the look on Maverick's face had him folding like a goddamn accordion.
Ice has never been a social person, and he sure as hell has never been one to outwardly advertise being queer. The closest he ever got was the not-so-secret gay bars in the 90s.
(He never got anything out of those, not really. He'd see a cute guy and maybe flirt, but he never let them touch him)
Maverick brought them to a booth full of flags with varying color schemes and patterns. Ice recognized the traditional rainbow flag, and grabbed one of those rubber bracelets with the pattern on it, just to appease Maverick.
Maverick spun around, a small flag in his hand that Ice vaguely recognized but couldn't put a name to it. It had blue, pink, and white stripes, and he held it out to Ice, "What's this?"
Maverick’s face dropped, "You don't recognize it?"
Ice hesitantly took it, "Not really," he looked down at it, "Should I?"
Maverick lowered his voice, "It's the trans flag, Tom." Oh.
Ice felt his stomach drop. Maverick’s face said it all. How could he not recognize something that represents him?
"You don't have to take it if you don't want to. Figured I'd offer it since it's here and it's free," Maverick shrugged, "or you could get something more subtle. Or not take anything with the flag at all."
Ice swallowed the lump in his throat, wrapping the flag around the plastic dowel it was attached to. He put it in his pocket, choosing to ignore how it stuck out, "What else do they have?"
Maverick excitedly showed Ice the free merchandise. There were temporary tattoos, stickers, small flags, bracelets, wristbands, and some small posters. Ice watched as Maverick took a small rainbow flag from the booth, as well as another one he didn’t recognize. It was yellow, black, purple and white. Maverick looked at Ice shyly as he grabbed it, Ice just shrugged.
Ice grabbed a bracelet with the trans flag on it and put it on, feeling heat rise to his cheeks at Maverick’s smile when he did it. It felt weird, outwardly acknowledging it. Advertising it. Everyone else here would know .
He had distant anxiety about being spotted by someone on base. He was in civvies, and his hair was floppier than usual, but the thought of someone seeing the COMPACFLT at pride with a goddamn transgender flag bracelet made his stomach flip.
He let Maverick drag him around to different booths, not paying much attention to what Maverick was saying but taking the chance to look around. He could see the Capitol building in the distance, and he wanted to laugh at the irony. Just a little bit.
Flags were everywhere. There was music playing, and Ice watched as people walked around in packs. A group of teenagers, all with different flags wrapped around their shoulders like capes, walked past him while chattering excitedly.
He never got that. Jesus, he was miserable.
“Hey, Ice. There’s a bar that’s giving out discounted drinks if you wanted to go.” Maverick said, coming into Ice’s view. He had a small bisexual flag (That flag he knew) painted on his cheek. Ice gave him a lead-the-way gesture, and Maverick smiled like a kid during Christmas as he grabbed Ice’s hand and dragged him through the street.
The bar wasn’t too crowded, shockingly. Maverick brought them up to the counter, claiming a couple of stools. He ordered them both beers, and Ice looked around the room. It was an open space, with high ceilings with some hanging lightbulbs. There was a rainbow flag hanging behind the bar counter.
Ice wasn’t even paying attention to whatever Maverick was doing anymore. Just being at an event like this had him clamming up. He did it for Maverick because he asked and Ice couldn’t say no to that face he was making. But- fuck. It was a lot.
A group of people came up to the bar next to Ice. Maverick was talking to some other people, and Ice subconsciously moved closer to his partner at the intrusion. They didn’t acknowledge him, just coming up to the bar to order whatever they were ordering.
Maverick put an arm around Ice’s shoulder, effectively pulling him into the conversation he was having. Ice clutched his beer close like it would shield him from being perceived.
“-we’re pilots, yeah.” What. Ice clutched Maverick’s shirt, giving it an aggressive tug.
“Commercial?” Someone asked. A dark-skinned man who was part of the group Maverick was speaking to.
“I’m military. Navy.” Ice didn’t miss the way Maverick said it. He was outing himself as military, not Ice. The group nodded, seemingly forgetting about Ice clinging to Maverick like a child. It must look pretty pathetic.
“We all met at work,” another guy spoke up. He had a traditional rainbow flag pin on his shirt, “we work on Capitol Hill.”
“Ah, government workers?” Maverick took a sip of his beer. Ice became painfully aware of a silent member in the group staring at Ice’s wrist. With the bracelets. They weren’t even hiding their stare either. Ice gulped, sinking into Maverick and tucking his hand into his pocket.
No one is going to recognize you. You’re fine.
Ice chugged the rest of his beer and put the empty bottle on the counter. He stood, pulling himself from Maverick’s grasp, “I’m gonna get some air.” He whispered. Maverick nodded, giving him a look of concern. Ice waived it off, walking towards the door of the bar.
Outside wasn’t much better in terms of noise, but there was space to breathe. His palms were sweating.
“Sorry if I scared you off.” Ice didn’t jump. He didn’t. The person that was staring at him earlier was now standing next to him. They gave him space, but Ice belatedly noticed the matching blue, pink and white bracelet.
“It wasn’t you. I just…”
“You’ve never been to one of these?” Ice shrugged, avoiding their eyes. He leaned on the metal railing in front of him,
“I’ve been hiding for almost thirty years, it’s hard to just… be open, I guess.”
They hummed, also leaning on the railing, “You’re military, right?” At Ice’s panicked look, they backtracked, “your partner didn’t say anything. The way you hold yourself, most people wouldn’t notice.”
“You military?”
“Family is. Just wasn’t something I wanted to do.” They shrugged, “I’m Laine, by the way. I don’t think I introduced myself to you.”
“Ic- Tom. I’m Tom.”
“You a pilot like Pete?”
“I was. I don’t fly for them anymore.” This conversation was getting too personal for Ice’s comfort. He didn’t want Laine to clock how high-ranking he was. Laine seemed to realize this, though.
“I work human resources in the Capitol building, that’s where I met Mike and Andy.” Ice nodded. Laine was fidgeting with their bracelet, “They’re the only ones that know I’m trans.”
Ice nodded again, “M-Pete’s the only one that knows.”
Laine raised an eyebrow, “Really?”
Ice shrugged, “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell wasn’t that long ago,” Ice looked up towards the Capitol, “Figured it’d be stupid to tell the Navy at that point. Maybe when I retire.”
“When’s that gonna be?” Laine asked, a playful glint in their eye.
“Whenever the Navy gets it together. I’m afraid once I leave everything will implode.” Laine laughed,
“You high up?”
Ice thought for a moment, “I’m… an admiral,” he offered, not technically lying. Yes, he was an admiral. Who happened to be in control of the entire Pacific Fleet. If Laine recognized him, they didn’t say anything.
“Well, I think you should drop the bomb on them when you do retire. It’d be funny.” Ice laughed,
“Yeah, it would be.”
They talked for a while, Laine offering their own coming-out story. They were obviously curious about Ice, but he kept his information limited. He told them how he put himself through school after running away, and how he married a lesbian during the DADT era to keep them both hidden. Laine seemed intrigued by that.
“How’d you meet Pete?”
“We met at TOPGUN, 1986.”
Laine gaped, “TOPGUN? Damn.”
“Yeah, we both got teaching positions there. He got sick of me though,” Ice chuckled, but he felt a stab in his heart at the memory, “We didn’t speak for a while. We reconnected in the 2000s, he was stationed at Norfolk, where I was.” Laine nodded.
“It actually wasn’t until after we reconnected that I told him I was, uh, transgender.” It still felt weird to say it, to put a word to what he went through his whole life, “before that, no one ever knew.”
Besides Goose.
Laine nodded sympathetically, “That sucks, being stuck in the closet for that long.”
“Yeah.”
The lull in conversation was awkward for a moment until Maverick came out with the other guys in Laine’s group (Andy and Mike- Ice remembered). Maverick wrapped an arm around Ice’s waist, “If we want to get back before nightfall we should start walking to the station.”
Ice nodded, picking himself up from the railing. They said their goodbyes, and when Laine and Ice shook hands, he felt them squeeze his hand extra tight. He returned it.
Maverick lead Ice through the crowd in the direction of the METRO station, “Did you enjoy yourself a little bit? I know it was a lot.”
Ice hummed, “Yeah. It’s definitely more… social than I’d like, but Laine’s nice.”
Maverick smiled, squeezing Ice’s hand.