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Chapter Text

have never hated someone that much in my whole life. She may be my mom, but she just pisses me off. She is crazy if she thinks that sending me to my father's house for the summer will change me. She just doesn't understand me. She had enough of my bad attitudes and social activies. Does she really believe that I will turn into a better guy by spending three months with my father? She obviously doesn't know me. I won't turn into someone different, I never will. I can't wait to be 18 and finally be free.

I'm Luke Hemmings, 17 years old. I just graduated from high school in Sydney. Am I planning on going to College? Of course not. Education is not part of my motto: Sex, Drugs, Alcohol. The only reason I didn't drop out of high school is because I was the King of the school. Everybody knew me, everybody wanted me. I can't blame them, I'm handsome and amazing.

Some people would say I'm a whore, but I prefer defining myself as a guy who never loses an occasion to have a great time. I just love sex; with girls or boys, older or younger. But I have a preference for older boys, they're hot.

I've never been in a relationship and I never will. I had many occasions in the past, but why should I stick to one fish when I can have a thousand. I don't do relationships. I have sex, and it ends there. I once had a friend with benefits, but the idiot felt in love with me. He said he wanted something more with me, good joke. Relationships mean problems, and I don't need them. I broke many hearts, but I don't care. People know what they're getting into when they come to me, and I won't change for anybody.

My enormous number of one-night stands along with drugs and alcohol are the main reasons my mom is sending me to my father's house in Florida. You could say I'm addicted to those things. How couldn't I? There the best things about life. My mother once tried to make me see a specialist who could help me with my addictions. I don't need help. I love my addictions. I just love getting twisted and bringing someone sexy back to my house and have my way with them.

See, my mom thinks I'll get rid of those bad habbits by staying with my father since I'll be away from my friends and everything. I see it in a different eye. New town, new people to have fun with. Nothing can stop me. I'm Luke Hemmings after all. She might have taken all my stock away, but she is crazy if she thinks I won't find any.

So here I am, sitting in the backseat of my father's car. He just picked me from the airport along with his new wife. He seemed happy to see me, I wasn't. My parents divorced when I was 13 because he met another woman while he was traveling to the United States. We stayed in touch, but we rarely talked after he moved in with her. I've never been closed to my dad, and it won't be any different after the summer vacations.

''We're here.'' My dad mentionned.

I got out of the car and grabbed my suitcases in the trunk. The house was smaller than my mother's, but it would do. It's not like I would often be there. The only positive aspect about it is that it's just by the beach. I've never had sex on a beach, guess there is a first time for everything.

I followed my dad and Lorie, her wife, in their house. No way I'm calling it my house, I don't belong here.

''Follow me Luke, I'll show you your room.'' My dad said.

I followed him up the stairs. He led me to the last room down the hall. He opened the door, revealing two beds.

''Why are there two beds?'' I asked as I entered the room.

''Because you will be sharing with Lorie's son, Ashton.'' My dad replied.

''Wait a minute. There is no way I'm sharing a room with some random dude I don't know.'' I replied.

I need my own space, but most importantly... how am I supposed to bring back sexy people if I share a room? I guess that Ashton dude will just need to deal with it.

''Okay Luke, let's put some ground rules.'' My dad said. ''Your mother might have accepted your little attitude of yours for a long time, but this won't do with me. While you stay here, you will do what I ask and you're going to act like a good boy for once?''

''Ha-Ha, don't speak like you know me, you know nothing about me, just like mom.'' I said.

''Enough.'' My dad yelled. ''Don't play those little games with me Lucas, because you are going to lose. You're going to share your room with Ashton and you're going to work for me.''

''Work?'' I replied harshly. ''No way.''

''I don't care about what you want Luke.'' My dad said. ''You didn't think I would let you do whatever you want so you can go get high and drunk just like you did, did you? Well suprise Luke, it won't happen.''

''You can't make me.'' I replied laughing.

''Oh you think so?'' My father said. ''We'll see about that.''

''Whatever, I'm going out.'' I exclaimed.

''You better be back in one hour for dinner. You'll be eating with Ashton, Lorie and I every night at 6PM.'' He replied.

''Or not.'' I said.

''I'm warning you. Just dare breaking that rule one time and I won't hesitate in sending the police searching for you. Like I said, two can play that game.'' My dad explained. He really thinks he can scare me with the police?

''I don't care about the police. Do whatever you want, I don't care.'' I said leaving the room.

My parents are hilarious by thinking they can change me and scare me. They think they know what is best for me, but they don't. I'm the only one who knows what is good for me.

I headed to the beach. There weren't much people there, but by what I could see, I would not have any problems in finding cute babes.

I walked by the beach for a long time, just listening to music and enjoying the view. The clock ticked 6PM. Well look at that, I'm still not home and no police. I was heading back home, not because I was scared...but because I was starving and who am I to say no the free food. I walked up the stairs leading to the balcony of the house and found my father and Lorie sitting at the table.

''When I say 6:00 PM, I don't mean 6:05.'' My dad mentionned.

''Whatever, I'm here now so stop being a drama queen.'' I replied.

''Don't talk to your dad that way young man.'' Lorie said. Who does she think she is?

''Sorry, I didn't ask for your opinion.'' I replied.

''Luke that is enough.'' My dad yelled.

''You said food would be ready at 6, where is it?'' I asked harshly.

''Change your tone. It will be served once Ashton gets here.'' My father answered.

''So the dude can be late, but I can't?'' I wondered.

''He's not a rebel like you. Ashton is a good boy.'' My dad replied.

That's the just my luck. I am stuck with some dude I don't know and he has to be some ugly nerd. Well, I never saw him, but nobody loves a mommy's boy. I was lost in my thoughts until someone sat next to me.

''Sorry, I'm late.'' The guy said.

''It's okay Ash! You guys introduce yourself, Daniel and I will go serve your food.'' Lorie said.

So that's Ashton? Forget my comment about him being an ugly nerd. He is nothing but ugly. He must be a couple of years older than me. He has beautiful dirty blonde curly hair and greenish-hazel eyes. I would totally have my way with him. Wow.

Ashton nodded. Once the parents were gone, he looked at me and smiled.

''Hey, I'm Ashton, you must be Lucas?'' He said.

''Luke.'' I corrected him.

''Well, Luke, it is nice to meet you.'' Ashton said. ''If you need anything, just ask me.''

''Do you, by any chance, have weed or any other kind of drugs?'' I asked quietly.

''No, no, no.'' He replied. ''I don't do drugs, drugs are bad.''

''Alcohol?'' I wondered.

''I don't drink, I hate the tast of alcohol.'' Ashton replied.

Yeah, he sure is a good boy. Usually, good boys would turn me off completely. This time is different. There is no way I'm letting this fish escape me. I'm Luke Hemmings, I can make good boys bad for a night. Or more. We'll just see how it goes. Maybe this summer would not be that boring after all.

Chapter Text

As soon as the dinner ended, I headed up the room I was sharing with Ashton. I didn't want to spend another minute with my dad and his wife. A new family life is the last thing that I want. I never asked to be stuck in this town, away from everything.

I sat on my bed and checked if I got any text messages from some people back in Sydney. Some of my friends texted me saying their summer was going to be boring withtout me, some boys and girls asked me to ''hang out'' and my mom texted me to make sure I was okay. There was no way I was answering her questions. She wanted me away from her, away I will be. She won't head of me all summer long.

I replied to my friends. I'm not the kind of boy who misses people, I don't get attached. The only thing I know is that summer is going to be long without them, because they were the ones I was messing around with.

I was on my own for about an hour before I was joined by Ashton in the room. All the things I wish I could do to him. He sat on his bed on the other side of the room. No words were said. After a few minutes, I had enough of this silence. I faced Ashton who was laying in his bed.

''Never smoke eh?'' I teased.

''Nop.'' Ashton replied as he sat up on his bed, facing me.

''You're really missing something dude.'' I said.

''How can I miss something I have never tried, Luke?'' He asked.

''It is just so fun you know, getting high and stuff.'' I answered.

''I have other ways to have fun.'' He said.

''You're no fun.'' I replied.

''You might be a little too fun.'' Ashton said smiling.

How could I be too fun? There is no way I can be too fun. I love sex and getting twisted all the time, so what? I enjoy life in the best ways possible. I don't want to be just a boring guy who never did anything with his life.

''I'm bored.'' I said. ''Is there anything to do around here?''

''I heard there was this party later on the beach.'' Ashton mentionned.

''Well, I'll know where I'll be tonight.'' I said. A party is the best place to have fun just the way I like it.

''I don't think your father is going to let you go, Luke.'' Ashton said.

''I don't care about my dad. If he doesn't want to let me go, I'll just go out without him noticing.'' I said. ''Luke Hemmings doesn't care about what his little daddy wants. He does what he wants to do. And tonight, he wants to get wasted and have s-''

''You better not bring some girl back here.'' He cut me off.

''I guess I'll just bring some boy instead.'' I joked.

''How about you just don't go to that party so you won't get in trouble.'' Ashton proposed.

''My dear Ashton, I love trouble. Trouble loves me. It's an infinite love.'' I replied.

''Yeah, I heard about that.'' Ashton mentionned smiling. '' I already knew you before meeting because of all the things your dad said about you.''

''What my dad says about me and who I really am are two opposites. Don't pretent to know me because my stupid father keeps complaining about how he wished I was a better boy. A perfect little boy like you.'' I replied harshly.

I hate it when people pretend they know me. They just don't. They all think everything about me is bad. How can it be bad when it feels so right? Plus, they all think that only three words describe me: sex, alcohol, drugs. I'm not just that. I'm also handsome and awesome.

''Sorry, I didn't mean to upset you.'' Ashton said.

''I'm used to it, don't worry. People love to judge me.'' I replied.

''I am not judging you, I promise. We may be totally different, I might not agree with your way of life... but I'm not judging you. It's your life after all. You can do whatever you want...just be careful I guess'' Ashton explained.

''Exactly.'' I replied.

''If you want to go to the party, you should ask your dad now before he heads to bed.'' Ashton proposed.

I stood up and headed to the living room where Lorie and my dad were watching TV. How boring must their lives be.

''Dad, there's a party on the beach and I'm going to go, ok? Thank you.'' I said.

''No, Lucas. You have your first day at work tomorrow and you need to be in good shape.'' My dad replied. ''I'm not letting you go to that party so you can do stupid things.''

''I'll be in good in shape, I'm used to hangovers anyway.'' I said.

''I said no.'' My dad yelled. ''You're staying with me for a reason and it's to make you quit that stupid way of life. You are not going.''

''Am I living in jail or what?'' I asked.

''Yes, yes you are. And you will do what I ask you to do. All. Summer.Long.'' My dad answered.

''I hate-'' I was cut off by a familiar voice.

''Eum, yeah mom?'' Ashton asked as he joined us in the living room. ''I would like to go to that party as well so eum, I could keep an eye on Lucas-''

''Luke.'' I said.

''Eum yeah, Luke. I could keep an eye on him and make sure he stays sober and stuff since you know I don't drink.'' Ashton proposed.

''Well, I think it is a good idea Ash! You never go out, so it would be good for you. What do you think honey? You know we can trust Ashton to keep an eye on Luke.'' Lorie said. Maybe I would get to like her. Maybe.

''Fine. But listen to me Lucas Robert Hemmings. You better stay with Ashton at all time. If you do anything stupid, he will call me and I will pick you up. And there will be consequences. Understand?'' My dad said.

''Yeah yeah fine.'' I agreed.

''Fine, go back to your room now, we're watching TV.'' My dad said.

''Night.'' Ashton said. What a mommy's boy.

Ashton and I headed back to our room, closing the door behind us. I started to get ready for the party, I needed to look fabulous. I did my hair first. Once I was done, I notice Ashton was still laying in his bed.

''Aren't you going to change yourself or anything?'' I wondered.

''Eum, no.'' Ashton replied.

''Well, I don't want to sound mean...but what you're wearing...not the best thing should I say.'' I explained.

''I don't care. What I meant is that I'm not going to that party.'' Ashton said.

''But I can't go if you don't!'' I spoke.

''Of course you can, you are going to sneak out, just like you wanted to do. Aren't you Luke Hemmings after all?'' He teased.

''Yeah, yeah of course.'' I agreed. ''But I still think you should come.''

''I don't want to.'' Ashton said.

''Why not?'' I wondered.

''I don't like parties. People are all drunk, trying to have sex with everybody... I just think parties are boring since I don't drink and am not looking for one-night stands.'' He answered.

''One-night stands are awesome dude.'' I mentionned.

''Yeah, maybe for you. But not for me.'' He replied. ''Anyway, I broke up with my boyfriend last week, so I'm not in the mood to have some stranger in my bed.''

Boyfriend. Good. Ashton is gay. That's good news.

''That's why I don't get into relationships. All I see from them is people getting sad and depressed. I don't need that. All I want is fun.'' I said.

''Relationships are great Luke. They are not only about breakups and problems.'' Ashton explained.

''Maybe for you. But not for me.'' I mimicked, making him laugh.

''Don't use my words against me Lucas.'' He replied.

''It's Luke.'' I said, getting a little impatient.

''Yeah, I know.'' He teased.

''Come on Ashton, come to the party with me! It will be fun.'' I insisted.

''We don't have the same definition of what fun is, Luke.'' He replied. ''I see no fun in getting drunk or smoking weed, so why should I go if I'm just going to stand there, doing nothing.''

''Because it will be a great occasion to spend time with your new bro.'' I said, not meaning it. I don't care about family links.

''Fine, I'll go under one condition!'' Ashton replied.

''Which one?'' I asked.

''Don't get ourselves into trouble.'' Ashton answered.

''I can't promise that, you know that Ash.'' I mentionned. ''But I'll try.''

And it sure was a promise I had no intention to keep. I don't go to parties and act like a good boy. I don't do that. Plus, I have Ashton with me, one of the sexiest human being I have ever seen. Maybe there's a bad Ashton sleeping in the too good one. And I would make sure to be the one to wake him up.

Chapter Text

It took us around 20 minutes to reach the party. It was already at full swing when we got there. There were tons of people dancing and getting drunk. The DJ was blasting his best mixes. It sure was going to be an amazing night. Well for me. I can't speak the same about Ashton.

We've been at the party for around one hour and a half and I was already tipsy. I had already drunk 6 beers and was about to end my 7th one. I just love alcohol and I drink fast. It tastes so good. Ashton tried to stop me from drinking, but he realized he couldn't do much about me. He would just tell me to take it easy because he wouldn't want me to be sick. Even though it was a little annoying, I appreciated the attention.

Ashton and I were in the middle of the dancefloor just dancing and talking about random stuff when the song suddenly changed to Turn Down For What.
''That's my song!'' I yelled happily.

''You said the same thing about the three previous songs, Luke.'' Ashton replied laughing.

''Well, they are all my songs Ash. All of them.'' I explained.

''Yeah, they are great I guess.'' He added.

I noticed how uncomfortable he was feeling by being surronded by drunk strangers. He just doesn't fit in this party life.

''You're not having fun, are you?'' I asked.

''Not really...but it's okay though. I've seen worst.'' He replied. ''Plus, I need to keep an eye on you, drunk boy.''

''Hey, I'm not drunk.'' I mentionned.

''Sure, you're not.'' He said smiling. What a gorgeous smile he has.

''I'm not drunk okay? I still can walk properly and I'm not stuttering. I'm just feeling good.'' I explained. ''Come on Ash, just drink one beer, it will make you feel good.''

''No thanks, I hate beer.'' Ashton replied.

''How can you not like beer? It's like the best beverage ever. It tastes like heaven and it makes you feel so good. You're not even human if you don't like beer Ashton. Beer is love, beer is life.'' I said, but I realized Ashton wasn't paying attention to what I was saying.

He was fixing something. I turned around and saw two guys kissing a few feet away from us. I turned back to face Ashton and noticed the tears falling down from his eyes.

''I-I'm going to go home.'' Ashton said sadly. He went to walk away, but I grabbed his hand.

''What's wrong Ash?'' I asked in caring way. Wait, why did I care about him being sad?

''I just saw my ex who I-I'm still in love with kissing another b-boy. That's what.'' He answered. ''Let me go Luke. You can stay here, I'll invent something if your dad asks. Just... I-I can't stay here.''

I let go of his hand and watched him ran away from the party, heading home. I had two options. The first one was to follow him and try to make him feel better using my best skills. Or two, I could stay at the party and have fun.

I chose option two. Honnestly, I came here to have fun. Ashton may be a sweet guy I'm dying to have in my bed, but I don't want to comfort him. I don't want to hear him cry over his ex and seeing him all depressed. Plus, having sex with a sad guy ain't fun. Because I'm pretty sure I would have succeeded in having him in my bed.

I made my way to the small bar in the middle of the beach and sat on a stool. I ordered another beer because I can never get enough of it. They didn't ask for my I.D., but I had a fake one in my pocket just in case they would. I always come prepare when it comes to alcohol.

The bartender came back a few minutes later, handing me two beers.

''Eum, I asked for one.'' I said.

''Yeah, I know. The second one is from the blonde guy behind me.'' The bartender replied.

I paid for my beer and noticed the hot blonde guy fixing me. Damn, he was hot. Well, not maybe as hot as Ashton, but still wow. Wait, why am I thinking about Ashton? He is just some boring guy.

The boy in front of me was probably around my age, maybe a little older. He was eye-fucking me, and I returned the favor. I knew what I would be doing later or should I say, who.

After minutes of intense fixation, the guy stood up and walked so he could sit on the stool beside me.

''I've never seen you around here before.'' The guy said.

''Well, that city is big.'' I replied. We were still looking at each other deeply in the eyes. It was one of my major turn on.

''It does when it comes to hot boys. Trust me, I would have noticed you before if you were from here.'' He mentionned.

''I guess you're hot too.'' I flirted.

''Your accent is hot. Australian right?'' He wondered.

''Yeah, I'm a sexy and awesome Aussie boy.'' I replied. ''What's your name?''

''Already asking personal questions, aren't you?'' The boy teased.

''Mmm, I just like to know the names of the boys I will fuck.'' I replied. Words came out of my mouth so easily, thanks alcohol.

''Good to know we have the same plan in my mind. I'm Michael. And you are?'' He replied moving his face closer to mine.

''I'm Luke.'' I said.

''Hot name for a hot guy.'' Michael mentionned.

''Why don't we go to your place and end this party in the best way possible?'' I proposed.

''I think that's an excellent idea, Luke.'' Michael agreed.

He stood up and I followed him to his house where we ended the party just the way I like it. Maybe Florida won't be so bad after all.

*******

I woke up the next day feeling awful, to the sound of a new familiar voice. I remember everything that happened last night, what an amazing night.

I remember going back to Michael's place where we drank a little more. I remember him taking me to his room, pushing me against the door and making out for a long time. I remember unclothing each other. But most of all, I remember having one of the best sex I have had in a long time.

''Luke, wake up, your phone won't stop ringing. Just pick it up already, I want to sleep.'' Michael demanded. Right, I was at some dude's place. I was in trouble.

I picked up my phone and saw my father's number.

''Hey Dad!'' I said.

''Lucas Robert Hemmings. You are so in trouble. You better tell me where you are right now! I can't believe you lied to me, and even made Ashton lied to us to protect you. I knew I couldn't trust you.'' My dad yelled on the phone. My poor head.

''Stop yelling please. I'm at some guy's place.'' I replied.

''Already in a guy's bed. You'll never change. You better text me the address in the next five minutes. I'm coming to pick you up for work.'' He said.

''Can I have the day off? I don't feel good.'' I demanded.

''I warned you Luke, you wanted to get drunk when you knew you had work the next day. You're coming to work, that's all. Text me the adress.'' My dad replied before the line went dead.

That was going to be a long and painful day. I had the most painful headache.

''What's your address?'' I asked Michael who was laying next to me.

''Give me your phone.'' He replied.

I gave him my phone, and he texted the address to my father. He also added his number in my contacts. I hope he doesn't get his hopes up.

I started to get dress since my father said he would be there in 5 minutes. I grabbed all of my stuff and as I was about to leave, Michael grabbed my hand and planted his lips on mine. The kiss was short but heated.

''If you want to have fun again, just call me. I'm all about fun, no feelings.'' Michael said.

''You were an awesome fuck, I guess I'll call you back.'' I replied.

He kissed me one last time and I was out of his room, than his house. My father was already waiting for me, with Ashton seating in the backseat. Wait, why is Ashton doing there?

I walked to the car and took place next to Ashton in the back seat.

''You're so grounded.'' My father said. It was the only thing he said to me during the entire ride to work.

I was exhausted. I felt observed. Ashton was actually looking me.

''Sorry.'' He said quietly so only me could hear him.

''What are you sorry about?'' I asked in a quiet tone.

''About you being in trouble. I'm not a good liar.'' He replied.

''It's okay, you didn't have to protect me. Besides, my night is worth the trouble.'' I said.

Nothing else was said. Even though I would be in trouble, which is nothing new to me...I would just break the rules again, and was feeling as if a car just ran over me, I was happy. I haven't been in Florida for 24 hours and I already got laid and drunk. This summer was going to be interesting.

Chapter Text

What a boring day it was. Why does my father hate me so much? Making me work in a stupid office where I need to take calls from customers I don't care about. Plus, my dad won't even pay me. He said that I would just flunk that money on ''useful'' stuff like drugs and alchol. He knows me so right. Maybe giving me money would motivate me, too bad for him I won't be.

Basically, my job consists in giving appointments to people. My dad is a dentist and he needed a second secretarty for the summer, Ashton being the first one. I also need to greet the clients who show up. Let me tell you how hard it is to fake a smile from 9 am to 4 pm.

Maybe my father will realize that I am a bad secretary, so he will fire me and he will just let me do whatever I want. He said that working would make me realize that there are more important stuff in life than fun. He is so wrong. Fun comes before everything.

So yeah, I'm stuck working in this office Monday to Friday from 9 to 4 all summer long. At least I get to work with Ashton. I could have fallen on a worst person to spend my day with. He might not be fun since he follows all the rules like the good boy he is.

For example, he would ignore me when I tried to talk to him. He replied to me once saying that I would get in trouble if my father noticed me doing anything that is not associated to my job. Poor Ashton, still trying to protect me from getting in trouble. One day, he might understand that I don't care about trouble, that I even like it.

''So what are you guys planning on doing tonight, Aston?'' My father asked as we entered the house.

''I'll probably stay in my room and read a little,'' Ashton replied.

''I'll probably give that Michael guy a call, I had fun last night, thanks for asking,'' I said.

''There's a reason I didn't ask you what you were going to do tonight. You are grounded and won't leave this house,'' My dad said.

''What am I, 12?'' I asked laughing. Wow, grounded. Should I be scared?

''I would say 6, a twelve year old if more responsible than you,'' My answered.

''You really hate me don't you?'' I asked.

''I hate what you have turned into,'' My dad answered. Well, he is not the person wishing I was different.

''That's okay Dad, I don't really like you either,'' I mentionned. ''If you excuse me, I'll be in my room doing things that don't concern you. Call me when diner is ready.''

''Watch your language Lucas, I'm your father,'' He yelled as I was going up the stairs.

''Nop, don't feel like it,'' I said laughing. I went in my room and closed my door behind me.

I sat on my bed and did the same thing I did last night: I checked my messages and Facebook notifications. As usual, I had many. It feels so good to be me. Do you know what else felt good? Sex with Michael. And I sure was going to get more tonight.

To Michael: Hey, it's Luke, also known as the best night of your life. Want to do it all over again tonight? ;)

A few minutes later I got a reply.

From Michael: Hello best night of my life. I was hoping you would text me. 10 PM at my place ;)

To Michael: I'll be there ;)

As I tossed my phone away, Ashton entered the room and sat next to me on my bed.

''You should be nicer with your dad, Luke,'' Ashton said.

''Why should I do when he's a jerk?'' I asked.

''I think he only wants what is good for you,'' Ashton replied timidly. ''He is your father after all, he want what is good for his son.''

''He doesn't know what is good for me. He left years ago. He didn't see me grow, he wasn't a big part of my life. I don't see why I should follow his precious little advices. I can take care of myself real good,'' I replied maybe a little bit to harshly.

''Sorry, I didn't want to make you mad,'' Ashton apologize.

''It's okay dude,'' I replied smiling. How could I be mad at a cutie like him?

''Anyway, who were you texting?'' Ashton asked.

''The guy I hooked up with last night. I got myself another rendez-vous tonight,'' I replied.

''But your dad said you could not leave the house,'' Ashton said.

''Dear Ashton, since when do I care about anything that my dad says?'' I asked smiling.

''Never, I guess.'' He answered smiling.

''Good answer.'' I said.

There was a short silence until he spoke again.

''How do you do it?'' Ashton asked.

''How do I do what?'' I replied.

''Just...being so carefree about everything. Just not caring about the consequences of your acts and not overthinking things,'' Ashton explained.

''I've always been this way, I guess. I just don't care about what other people think, I just do what I want to do whenver I want to. I don't want to waste my life living under authority or expectations. All I want is to have fun, like you might already know,'' I said.

''I wish I could be more like you,'' Ashton mentionned.

''You could be. You're like 20 years old or something?'' I asked.

''Yeah, I'm 20,'' Ashton answered. ''It's just that all my life people have been telling how important it is to be a good person and to follow the rules. All my life, I've been trying to fit in the majority, because that is what is expected from me. I don't know what fun is. I don't have friends, I never go out and I'm scared to try new things. I don't know...sometimes I just feel like a big loser, mostly when I'm next to you. Like you have experienced so many things while the biggest thing I did is having sex with my ex. And you, like...you smoke, you drink, you have sex with hot guys you don't know like it is normal. I'm not saying that I'm jealous of the things that you do. I'm just saying that I wish doing things out of the norms would not bother me so much, that I could be a carefree guy like you.''

I knew it. I knew that behind this good boy attitude was hiding a young boy who is begging to live his life the way he wants to. He just never had the chance to do it due to the pressure people put on his shoulders.

''First, breaking the rules doesn't make you a bad person. I don't consider myself as a bad person, I just don't fit in the majority,'' I said. ''I do things that people don't accept, but they can't control my life. They can't control yours either. Stop caring so much about what the others say. It might not be easy at first since well, you've always been the good boy doing what he was asked to do and be...but it'll get easier with time. You're not a loser Ash. You just never had the chance to experience. And you can have that chance if you want to. There are so many things in life that you could be experiencing. And you'll enjoy them if you stop caring, if you just accept that you can't live your life for the others. You need to live for yourself, Ash.''

''That seems so easy coming out from your mouth, it seems like having fun is such an easy thing to do,'' Ashton said. ''I'm just so afraid of the consequences.''

''I assure you that it is as long as you don't think about what could happen. Just live in the present and forget about the rest,'' I replied. And I sure was going to show him how easy it is to have a little fun.

I moved closer to him and began kissing his neck. I was pushed away a few seconds later.

''Luke, what are you doing?'' Ashton asked. ''This is wrong.''

''Stop overthinking things Ash, as long as you enjoy something, there is nothing wrong. Do you trust me?'' I replied.

''Eum yeah, I guess,'' Ashton replied timidly.

I smiled and went back to kissing his neck, searching for his soft spot. As I got nearer from his collarbone, a quiet moan escaped his mouth. I didn't hesitate in biting the spot and sucking on it.

''Fuck, that feels good,'' Ashton said.

''That's how fun makes you feel,'' I replied.

I kept kissing his neck while rubbing his thigh with my hand. Ashton had his eyes closed, I knew that he was enjoying this. The fun moment came to an end when a voice I came to hate echoed in the room.

''Boys, dinner's ready,'' My dad yelled from downstairs.

I moved away from Ashton who had a smile on his face; a smile that had nothing to do with the ones he gave me before.

''See, that was fun,'' I said.

''Yeah, yeah it was,'' Ashton replied.

''Everything's fun as long as you're with me,'' I mentionned.

''I'll just need to stick around you more, I guess,'' Ashton replied. ''That's not a big problem, you are a cool guy.''

If it were only for me, I would have made things go further with Ashton. But I could not. I'm still impressed that he even let me touch him a little. Inside of Ashton lays a bad boy who is begging to come out. And I would make everything that I can do to let the real Ashton come out.

''Operation Let's turn Ashton into someone fun has officially started,'' I said happily.
''What is the first thing on your list?'' He asked.

''You'll discover it in a matter of time, trust me you will,'' I replied.

''Will I get into trouble?'' Ashton asked.

''If anything happens, I'll take the blame for both of us. Don't you worry about a thing my little good boy, you're safe with me.'' I answered.

Chapter Text

"So, I'm hosting a little party tomorrow night! There will be around 5 to 10 people, it would be fun if you showed up," Michael said after our non-religious activities.

"Oh dear Michael, already addicted to me aren't you?" I replied.

"It will just be easier to have you in my bed my dear Luke. Think about it, we'll both be high and drunk, it will be nice!" Michael said.

"I guess you're right. You had me with the words bed, high and drunk. But I have one condition," I replied.

"What is it blondie?" He asked.

"I can bring one of my friends," I answered. That would be a nice occasion to initiate Ashton to my fun world.

"As long as we have sex after the party, I have no problem with your friend showing up," Michael said before kissing me passionately.

"Round 2?" I proposed.

"You read my mind," Michael agreed.

****
I woke up at around 3am in Michael's bed. I didn't want to seem like a dependant guy so I grabbed my things and left his house quietly.

I made my way home hoping everybody would be asleep. Even though I don't care about getting into trouble, I don't feel like being yelled at in the middle of the night.

My hopes fell down when I slowly opened the door and saw Ashton's mother sitting in the living room watching TV.

"Luke?" She asked.

"Yeah! You can go tell my lovely father about it so he will yell at me nice and good," I answered.

"I won't tell your father, under one condition," Lorie said.

"I would rather being yelled at than cleaning the house," I replied.

"I wasn't going to ask you to clean the house, we have a maid for that. I want you to stop making Ashton lie about your where abouts. He has never lied to us until you came in," She said. He lied for me again?

"Whatever Ashton told you, I never asked him to lie for me. I can handle getting into trouble without him protecting me or whatever he is trying to do," I replied.

"Yeah sure. Just go to bed Luke, it's late," Lorie said before giving her attention back to her boring TV show.

I walked to my room, not caring about whatever Lorie thinks. I opened my room's door quietly so I wouldn't wake up Ashton. It was no use since I could tell he wasn't asleep because he was on his phone.

"Had a fun night?" Ashton asked as he put his phone away.

"Yup," I replied.

"Chill!" He said.

Nothing else was said. I didn't bother in getting changed into night clothes. I just laid in my bed, waiting to fall asleep. But there was one night that I needed to clarify.

"Hey, are you awake?" I asked.

"Yeah, I am," He answered.

"You should stop lying for me Ash," I said. "Don't get into trouble for me, it's not worth it."

"Yeah eum, I don't know... I mean I just don't want you to get into trouble. Even though you say that you don't care about being caught and being in trouble, I just don't like seeing you being yelled at by your father," Ashton replied.

"But Ash, you will get into trouble for doing this! Your mom already seems pissed off and it will get worst with time...And I know how you don't want that," I mentionned.

"Maybe I don't care that much anymore," Ashton replied.

"Ash..." I said.

"I mean it Luke! Like I said before, I'm tired of doing what people are expecting me to do. I feel like I've never lived for myself! I've only lived for everyone else but me. I've never done anything I really wanted to do. And lying for you is one thing I want to do, even though it is bad," Ashton said.

I could totally understand what Ashton was saying. I guess we were similar on this point: just wanting to do whatever we want to. Unlike him, I never let anyone tell me what to do. If I had let them, I would be just like Ashton. I would seem to be a happy guy, but inside of me I wouldn't.

''Have you ever thought about moving out of this place? Like, you could find your own place where you could start your own life and do whatever you want to,'' I said.

''Yeah, I did, more than once. But I guess I'm scared. My mom said she would stop paying for my studies if I ever move out. She said she would pay for me as long as I live with her and your dad. It just sucks you know. She has so much control on me. I know that, I feel it. I'm just too scared to get out of it. I mean, what if I don't get enough money for my studies? I love studying, I really do. And like, I've never done anything on my own, I never took my own decisions. That's why I'm afraid of moving out. Even though I want to, I don't have the guts to do it,'' Ashton replied.

''There's a first time for everything Ash. Don't let your fears dominate you. I know you could do this if you want to,'' I reassured him.

''I guess you're right. Damn, I'm so jealous of you Luke. Everything seems so easy for you,'' He said.

''Things don't have to be hard for you Ashton. Don't let them be difficult, make them be easy and cool. Life will get so much better for you if you do this. You'll see how fun life can be, you will start enjoying it,'' I replied.

''Yeah, you're right. Thanks for listening to me and giving me some advices. I appeciate it. You are mature for a 17 years old rebel.'' He said.

''A FUN 17 years old rebel. Oh, talking about rebel...Michael is throwing a small party later! I asked him if I could invite you and he say yes. It would be nice if you showed up. There will be a maximum of 10 persons,'' I proposed.

''Yeah, I don't know. You know how akward I can be when I attend parties. I don't want them to think I'm a loser because I don't drink or smoke,'' Ashton replied.

''Ash, stop worrying about stuff like that. Nobody will force you to do things you don't want to do. I don't know the other guys that will attend the party, but for what I know, Michael is a cool guy. He won't think you're a loser. I'll be there if anything happens. Please Ash, it would be fun,'' I said.

''I don't know Luke...'' Ashton replied.

''I thought you wanted to have fun, it would be a great occasion, come on!'' I pleaded.

''Okay, fine! But if I don't like it, I leave,'' Ashton agreed.

''You won't regret it, I promise!'' I assured him.

And with that, we both fell asleep until we would have to wake up to head to our extremely boring job. I couldn't wait for the night.

******

We reached Michael's house at 11PM. Gladly, Ashton still agreed to come with me even though we was scared. I got his mom and my dad to let us go out. I'm not crazy, I didn't tell them we were going to a party. I told some bullshit about going bowling and stuff. My father didn't agree at first, but Lorie made him change his mind.

Getting ready for the party was another thing. Ashton wouldn't stop worring about looking like and idiot. He didn't want to wear his own clothes because he thought they were ugly. I let him borrow some of my clothes: a pair of black skinny jeans and a grey tank top. He looked extremely sexy in those clothes.

Back to the party. I knocked on Michael's door. It opened a minute later, revealing an already drunk Michael. Let the fun begin.

''Hey Luke!'' He greeted. ''Who's your friend?''

''I'm Ashton, nice to meet you,'' Ashton replied. I was surprised that he answered the question, maybe he just stopped worrying and just wanted to have fun after all.

''Well come in guys!'' Michael said.

We followed him inside and he led us downstairs where we were met by the familiar scent of alcohol mixed with weed that I love so much. 2 people were dancing and drinking while 2 others were smoking.

''Do you guys want a beer?'' Michael asked.

''What kind of question is that? Yeah!'' I agreed.

''Euh..yeah.'' Ashton replied. Did he really want to, or was he just trying to fit in?

Michael came back a few seconds later with our beers in his hands.

''Well, enjoy the party guys! And Luke, I'll see you later,'' Michael said.

''Of course,'' I replied in a flirtatious tone.

Ashton and I sat on an empty couch. I took a big mouthful of my beer and Ashton did the same.

''You don't have to drink if you don't like it,'' I said as I noticed his expression showing he wasn't enjoying it at all.

''No. They'll think I'm a loser,'' Ashton replied. ''Have you seen all those guys? They are like so cool, just like you. And there is me, the pathetic 20 years old who doesn't know how to have fun.''

''Will you stop being so hard on yourself Ash? It's so annoying. How many times will I have to tell you that you don't have to do anything that you don't want to do? I told you tonight was about having fun, but you just seat there and keep getting anxious about things nobody cares about.'' I replied hashly.

What was I expecting? Did I really expect that Ashton could have fun and not worry about things? Did I really think he could change just for one night?

Why should I keep trying to show him what fun is if he doesn't make any effort. Why should I keep trying when he keeps complaining about stupid stuff? I have better things to do.

I drank what was left of my beer and grabbed Ashton's to drink it all as well. I'm sure not going to seat there with him if he is not even going to try to have a little fun. Luke Hemmings doesn't do that.

I stood up leaving Ashton on his own. I joined the stoners on the other couch who offered me a joint. It's has been less than a week since I last smoked and I really did missed it.

As I took a first puff, I saw Ashton standing up and heading to the stairs right next to me. He'll be better at home anyway. There, he will have nothing to worry about.

''Bye Ash,'' I yelled. ''Have fun getting back home.''

He didn't reply, he simply ignored me. As he was going up upstairs, another guy was coming downstairs. I recognized him as the guy we say on the beach the other night, his ex.

''Ashton Irwin, already leaving the party, aren't you?'' His ex asked.

Ashton didn't reply. He wasn't moving, his eyes were fixed on that guy.

''Cat got your tongue? Not a big waste, you never knew how to use it anyway,'' The guy said.

Even though it was mean, I couldn't help but laugh a little, so did the others. But my mood changed when I saw how hurt Ashton was. He climbed the stairs faster than a cheetah.

I don't why, but I needed to follow him. Maybe it's because of alcohol. I always care a little more about people when I drink. Sober me doesn't care if people are sad. I followed him outside and I could hear him crying.

''Why are you crying Ashy?'' I asked.

''Just go back inside Luke,'' He replied sadly.

''Why?'' I wondered. ''Don't you want a friend to tell all your problems?''

''I don't need a friend like you. I saw you laughing down there, I saw how amused you were. I also thought that you would be more comprehensive about my fears, but I was wrong. I thought you actually cared about me, but you don't. You really don't care about people. All that matters is you. So yeah, don't bother with me anymore. I'll go tell my problems nobody cares about to someone else and you'll have all the time you want to go fuck everything that moves and scrap your health with drugs and alcohol,'' He replied.

He didn't give me time to reply. He just ran away, probably heading home. I have two options: follow him or get back inside. Being the selfish guy I am, I chose option 2.

Chapter Text

I came back home the next morning looking fresh and alive. Yeah, who am I kidding? I looked like a zombie. I had the biggest headache and all I wanted to do was to throw up. But, I would not change a thing.

Last night was amazing and perfect. I made new friends who share the same interests as me, I got drunk, I smoke weed and even had a treesome with Michael and his friend Alex. Never have I felt so good in my entire life. I was on Cloud9, but I was soon brought back to reality when I open the front door of my father's house. Lorie and my dad were sitting in the living room. My dad was the first to talk.

''Lucas Robert Hemming, where were you last night?'' He yelled. ''You are so grounded young boy.''

''Dad, I told you. I went bowling with some friends and I slept at a friend's house afterwards. There is no need to ground me,'' I replied.

''I was hoping you would not lie to me Lucas. Ashton told us you both went to a party. You lied to us,'' My dad said.

''Well, if Ashton says so, then it must be true, right?'' I asked. Looks like Ashton finally decided to stop lying for me, I can't really blame him. I've been kind of a douche towards him at the party.

''Don't use that little tone when you talk about my son, '' Lorie warned me. ''What happened to him? He came back home last night crying and locked himself in his room. He hasn't come out since then.''

''I don't know man, I'm not in his head,'' I replied.

''Did something happened at the party?'' She asked. They want no more lies, then I'll give them the truth.

''Want to know what happen? Ok fine. Last night, I told your son he was boring and annoying, that he did not know how to have fun. Then, his ex came in and started making fun of Ashton, and it made me laugh, a lot. Ashton got sad and mad, basically told me I was a jerk and left,'' I answered.

''You're such a disgrace Lucas,'' My dad mentionned.

''Could you tell me something I don't know, please?'' I replied.

''Your dad is right,'' Lorie said. Well, I guess I won't like her after all. ''Since Ashton started hanging out with you, he's not the same. He started lying to us and doing things behind our back. Plus, how dare you say such horrible things to my son? I never saw him that upset before. Do you know how much it hurts for a mother to see her son coming home crying and not wanting to talk about it?''

Wow, I didn't imagine that my words and attitude would hurt Ashton that much. What I said wasn't even that bad, he needs to toughen up.

''I'm sorry, I guess,'' I replied, not really feeling sorry at all. I never feel sorry about my actions.

''Then fix it. Go talk to him, he won't listen to us. Apologize or do whatever it takes, but fix this. I don't care how long it takes. When you come back, Ashton needs to be with you and happy,'' Lorie ordered.

''Your wish is my command, your majesty,'' I replied.

I left the angry adults and climbed the stairs, heading to the room I share with Ashton. The door was closed. I knocked it and got no answer. I decided to open it because it's also my room after all. I don't have to knock to go in my room.

There were no lights on. There wasn't a single sound. All I could hear was the beat of my heart and my breathing.

''Ashton?'' I said. No answer.

I walked to his bed and realized it was empty. Ashton wasn't in our room. Maybe he decided to leave the house so he would not have to see me again, maybe he just needed some time alone.

I left our room and was about to go back down in the living room when I heard the faint sound of someone crying in the bathroom. There was no doubt that this was Ashton. That guy can cry for a long time.

''Ashton, are you okay?'' I asked as I knocked on the bathroom door.

''G-go away Luke,'' Ashton replied. He definitely was crying.

''What's wong, Ashton?'' I asked.

''I said go a-away Luke. L-leave me alone,'' He answered.

I could just leave him by himself until he stops crying and lie to his mom by telling her he is asleep. I could also open the door and try to comfort him, even though it's not my favorite thing to do.

I picked the second option. I've already been enough of a jerk towards him, the least I could was to try to fix my mistakes. Wait, why did I want to fix my mistakes?

I pushed the thought away and opened the door. I could not believe what I was seeing. I heard about it before, but I've never been confronted to it. I wished it had stay that way, because the view was horribly sad.

Ashton was sitting on the floor covered with little spots of blood. He had cut, revealing how sad and hurt he was. I couldn't even count how many cuts there were on his arms. There were too many. I didn't know what to do. I've never been in that situation before. I've never seen someone hurt so much before.

''Ash, what did you do?'' I asked quietly as I sat in front of him.

He didn't reply at first. His had his head fown, but I could see the tears coming out from his eyes.

''Because nobody cares, because I'm just an annoying loser with a boring life,'' He replied sadly. Did I make him feel that way?

''That's not true Ashton. Your mom do cares about you, my dad cares about you, I care about-,'' I said but couldn't finish my sentence.

''Lies,'' Ashton said. He took a deep breath before speaking again. ''My mother and your dad don't really care about me. They j-just assume what is best for me and get mad when I decide otherwise. They saw m-me coming home crying last night. Not once did they came in my room to check if I was okay. Not once. And you. Just don't pretend that you care about me. You made it clear last night.''

''I might have been mean...but I still care about you,'' I said sincerly.

''No, no you don't,'' He replied. I didn't want to argue about it any further. I had other questions in mind.

''Why did you do this to yourself?'' I asked. ''There are other way to express your sadness...''

''Because I deserve it, and like I said...nobody cares about me,'' He answered. ''My family wouldn't understand, my ex hates me and I don't have any friends. It hurts to be alone all the time. I thought I had you. You were to first one who seemed to understand me. You were the first to actually talk to me like I wasn't a loser. But I was wrong. You're like the others. Cutting is all I have left.''

It really hurt me to see him talking this way. It hurt hearing him saying such horrible things about himself. If I had known he was so sensitive, never would have said those things to him. I wouldn't have tried to change. I know I should have followed him last night when he ran away. My fun side just always win over my caring one.

I could understand how Ashton was feeling. I sometimes feel like him, like people don't care about me. Take my family for example, they see me as a big failure. Fortunately, I have friends who seems to care about me...but Ashton doesn't.

''I know you think that I don't care about you, and I can't blame you. I've said nasty things to you. I should have protected you. I know I shouldn't have made fun of you. But that's who I am...the carefree Luke Hemmings who tries to avoid any type of drama because it is no fun,'' I replied.

''Just leave me alone then...Like you said I'm no fun,'' Ashton said.

''You did not let me finish,'' I continued. ''Like I was saying, I usually don't care about hurting people, I even think that it is funny. But right now, trust me when I say that I care. I don't want you to hurt yourself.''

I couldn't help myself but glancing at his arms. The cuts didn't seem pretty deep...but the view almost brought me to tears.

''Why? What makes me different?'' He asked.

''You made me realize that I can cause horrible things...'''I replied sadly.

''Don't put all the blame on your shoulders Luke... It wasn't just your fault,'' Ashton assured me.

''But I could have stopped it,'' I added.

''Yeah...but at least you're here now when no one else is. I know that my mother probably sent you...but you could have ran away from me...but you stayed. Thank you,'' he said with a small smile on his face.

''You're welcome. I'm going to let you clean up okay? I'll be in our room and we can talk a little more. And please, promise me you won't do it again!'' I said.

''I'll try, I promise,''Ashton replied.

I stood up and headed to our room with many thoughts in mind. For the first time, I realized that my actions can have horrible consequences. I thought it was fun, to laugh about somebody. I didn't know that it could lead to situations like Ashton's.

For the first time, I cared about seeing someone sad. I felt a new emotion when I saw Ashton on the ground. I felt something new, something I've tried to avoid for such a long time.

And most of all....I felt sorry for the first time.

Chapter Text

Ashton's P.O.V.

****Leaving Michael's Party****

Humiliated. Useless. Stupid. Those are great adjectives to describe how Calum and Luke made me feel. What Calum said to me did not surprise at all. He made it clear when he broke up with me that I was the most boring boyfriend he ever had and that I actually was a loser.

His words hurt me, but they didn't hurt as much as Luke's words and reactions. I thought he understood me, I thought he actually cared about me. He clearly doesn't. His words were harsh. He abandonned me when he said he would stick with me at the party. He knew I was scared, but he got mad. I was ruining his fun, I was selfish.

I could not stay any longer in that house, mostly after I saw Luke laugh at what Calum said. I was hoping that he would protect me, that he would simply tell him to shut up. He didn't. I'm not worth it, and he didn't care enough about me to stand up from in front of his cool friend.

The thing is that nobody cares about me. I'm just the good loser guy at everyone eyes. I'm just the pathetic Ashton Irwin that people treat badly or expect to much from him. The weight on my shoulders is getting to big, I might not be able to support it much longer. In fact, I had no intention to.

What happened at the party was the straw that broke the camel's back. All my life, I've been tolerating how people acted with me. I tolerated their expectations, their bad words, their punchings...everything.

I just can't take it anymore. It's too much for a single human to handle. I have nobody to help me and understand me, my mother being the one who pressures me the most along with her husband. I don't have any friends I can talk to, I have nobody. It's just me stuck with myself.

A part of me hoped that Luke would chased after me after I ran away from the party. It could have stopped me from having all those dark thoughts in mind. I knew he wouldn't follow me, because he is like everybody else. Careless. Careless about my feelings and about my entire self.

I ran back to my house, crying more than ever. I was a mess, I didn't want to feel that way anymore. I opened my front door and saw that my mother and my step-father were watching TV, as usual. They both noticed my sad face and asked millions of questions.

''Ash, what are you doing here? I thought you and Luke were at the bowling?'' My mother asked.

There was no way to lie for Luke again. He would get mad, but I wouldn't be able to face it. I would be gone.

''There never was bowling, we went to a party and I left because Luke and his friends are jerks,'' I replied.

''So you lied to us?'' My mother asked. ''How dare you lie to Ashton Fletcher Irwin? I have raised you better than this. How many times have I told you how lying is rude and horrible? You're disrespectful.''

On all the questions she could have asked, she asked that one. She found it more important to know that I lied than to comfort me. She didn't care that people made fun of me, she didn't care that I was crying in front of me. She was mad that I did not act like the perfect little boy I'm supposed to be.

That just made me sad even more. After Luke and Calum, it was my mother's turn to make me feel like I'm a big pile of shit. Did they talk to each other and agreed to make my life miserable?

''Yeah,'' I replied harshly.

I didn't give her time to reply. I climbed the stairs two by two and locked myself in my bedroom. I had so many bad thoughts on my mind. I was hurt, depressed, sad.

It only made it worst to see Luke's things in the room. I felt betrayed by someone I should not even care about. The thing is that I liked Luke. He was the first one to actually try to be my friend. I thought he wouldn't give up on me. He did, just like everyone else. He moved on.

I can't blame him. Who would want to hang out with me? Who would wish to go out with a fat ugly loser? Nobody wants to be around Ashton Irwin. It hurts to know that I'll always be alone, that I'll never have someone to protect me.

I cried on my bed for hours. I did not catch any sleep. I was simply thinking about my life and how useless I am. I did not want to feel a thing anymore. I wanted to leave, I don't belong here. Nobody would even care if I was gone. I would just be one less mouth to feed. It would make everybody happy.

Why did it have to be? Why should I be the one who keeps getting hurt? I don't see myself as a bad person, why does like keep sending me obstacles? Why does life pushes me to the point where I just wanted to kill myself and never see the Sun again?

The night soon turned into morning when I heard the parents making some noise from the kitchen downstairs. This was my chance. I tried to push the thought away durning the night, but it would not go away. That is what I really wanted. I wanted to die.

I quietly opened my room's door and closed it behind me. I walked to the bathroom and locked myself in it as my mother and his husband had no idea about what I was about to do. I looked at myself in the mirror. All I saw was an ugly, stupid, useless, fat and horrible boy.

I opened my drawer containing all my hygiene stuff. I was looking for something in particular, and I finally found it. I was reuniting with an old friend of mine that I haven't seen in so long : a razor blade. I sat on the floor as the tears kept falling down my cheeks.

I threw away years of being clean when I put the blade against my left arm and did a small cut. I have gone years fighting the urges, but I fell. I fell everything that I attempted in my life, I am a big failure.

There was no going back. I kept cutting until both my arms along with the floor were covered with blood. I couldn't tell how much cuts there were on my arms, but I knew that the amount was proportional to my degree of pain. And that degree was enormous.

I knew that this wouldn't be enough to kill me. A small part of me didn't want to die, but a bigger part wanted to. I spotted a small bottle of painkillers belonging to my mother on the small counter next to me. I tried to reached it. It hurt, but I did it.

That was it. That would be my last action as an alive person. That was my last goodbye. I opened the bottle and as I was about to put a first pill in my mouth, I heard a familiar voice at the door.

''Ashton, are you okay?'' Luke asked from the other side of the door. What was he doing here? Who does he think he is to ask me how I am. He is partially reponsible for this.

''G-go away Luke,'' I replied crying. I thought he was going to leave it there. As I was about to take the first pill once again, he spoke again.

''What's wrong, Ashton?'' He asked. He's such a good actor. I know he doesn't care about me, nobody does.

''I said go a-away Luke. L-leave me alone,'' I replied.

I was a sobbing mess. I threw the bottle of painkillers on the wall before the door opened revealing a worried Luke...and for once, I could tell his expression wasn't just a lie.

****Present****

As I cleaned myself up, I had lots of thoughts in mind. Those thoughts were more optimistic than my previous ones. I knew that, in the end, I would be okay.

Before my conversation with Luke, I was 200% certain that I wanted to die. I just wanted to give up on everything and leave this world for a better place. I wasn't thinking straight. I just wanted to end it all. I didn't want to fight anymore.

After this conversation, a smaller part of me still wanted to die, but not as much. The truth is, I wake up everyday wishing I was dead, but I can push the thoughts away. I can fight the urge to hurt myself. A bigger part of me still wants to fight and believes that every storm as its end.

At first, I didn't believe a single word that Luke said to me. I wouldn't let myself believe that he actually cares about me. But as the conversation went on, I saw guilt and caring in his eyes for the first time.

I wish he would have realized that his words could cause pain in another way than seeing me covered in blood and cuts. At least he did, and I believe he was sincere. He did really felt about the whole situation. He believed he was the one and only to push me to harm myself and I couldn't let him having this idea.

For once, he didn't ran away from me. For once, he didn't try to escape drama and problems. For once, he stayed. I'm thankful that he opened that door and tried to make me feel better about myself. I'm glad that he didn't give up on me for once.

Even though he hurt me, I wanted to believe that he would change. I wanted to give him a second chance. I wanted to give him the opportunity to show me that he can care about someone else that isn't him.

If it wasn't for Luke knocking on that door and talking to me, I would be dead. Nobody would have stopped it. My dead body would have been found in the bathroom a couple of hours later. I would have been forgotten and we wouldn't have talked about me anymore.

I'm thankful that he found me and he stopped me. He might have been one of the reasons I wanted to end it all, but he's also the only who stopped me from doing an ultimate mistake.

Things will get better, I believe that one day they will. Life will go easier on me, life will let me be happy. I've had enough downs, I couldn't wait for the ups to come back.

Chapter Text

Luke's P.O.V.

An entire week has passed since the whole Ashton situation. He was still very fragile the first few days, but things got better through the week. I was scared that he would try to hurt himself once again, but he didn't. He promised me that he was doing fine. He said that he no longer had dark thoughts and the he didn't want to kill himself anymore.

I've been hanging a lot with Ashton during that week. We still had to go to work which was still as boring and unpleasant as it first was. I couldn't escape it, my father was ready to do anything just so I would be sitting at that desk for hours, taking calls from many persons I don't care about.

At least I had Ashton by my side. He wouldn't talk to me much during the working hours since he doesn't want to get in trouble. I can't blame him, he's getting paid. He can't risk getting caught breaking the rules.

Since I wasn't paid at all, I didn't mind messing around or being sometimes rude to clients. My father would warn me to change my attitude, but I wouldn't listen. I was still hoping that I could get out of this job if I succed in pissing him enough.

Most of my evenings were spent with Ashton. Most of the time, we would just talked about random stuff to get to know each other better. The first two days, I kind of feel forced to hang out with him because of what happened. As the week went on, I really did want to hang out with him.

Ashton is an interesting person. I'm glad I got to know him more and that I didn't stick with the image of the perfect little boy. He's been through a lot of difficult moments in his life and I admire him for that. He's a strong guy with a great personnality. Plus, he is still the cutest and sexiest person I've ever laid my eyes on.

I learned that Ashton was a drummer. He has a drum set in the basement that I never noticed since I never went into the basement. He can also play the guitar, just like me. I also can sing, and I'm really good at it. Maybe one day we could jam together, that would be nice. I bet he's an excellent musician.

Ashton and I also spent time playing video games or watching some series on Netflix. Even if it isn't my favorite kind of fun, I found a way to enjoy it. Ashton made me discover this TV show about two brothers hunting demons and other supernatural creatures. It's really great. I love the plot and the protagonists, Sam and Dean, are too hot for my own mental health.

I still sneaked out of the house to go at Michael's place when everybody was asleep. I didn't do it every night, maybe a night or two during the week. I still needed my dose of weed and sex and Michael did know how to provide them. I could find somebody else, but why give up something as good as Michael?

I made sure to come back home before my father got up so he could bring me to this living hell called work along with Ashton. Dear Ashton, I loved the little teasing smile on his face when he saw me entering our room by the window.

I wanted to do something fun with Ashton since it was Saturday and that we didn't have to go to work. We were currently watching another episode of this amazing TV show.

''We should do something fun today,'' I proposed.

''I think watching Supernatural is a fun thing to do,'' Ashton replied. Oh, that's the name of the serie, Supernatural.

''Yeah, I agree, but we've been doing this all week! Let's do something else that is also fun,'' I replied.

''Can I remind you that we don't really have the same definition of fun?'' Ashton mentionned.

''Well, that's why I'm asking you to pick a fun activity that you like for the both of us,'' I said. ''As long as it's not going to a museum.''

''Damn, that's what I was about to say,'' Ashton replied laughing.

''Nerd,'' I teased.

''Jerk,'' Ashton replied with the cutest smile on his face. ''But seriously, I have no idea. I rarely go out...''

''Come on, there must be something! What did you do for fun when you were younger?'' I asked.

''Eum, I used to enjoy to go to this Karting place with my father,'' Ashton replied. ''I haven't been there in years.''

Ashton never mentionned his father before. It made me curious. Where was he? Who was he? Is he still alive?

''You never mentionned you father before...did something happened?'' I wondered.

Ashton looked at me, the question totally taking him by surprise.

''Eum...well,'' he said nervously.

''You don't have to say anything Ash, I didn't want to make you uncomfortable with my question. I was just curious, that's all,'' I assured him.

''It's okay...eum. My father used to be my best friend. My parents divorced when I was 6 years old. I would go to my father's house every weekend. It was the best moment of the week. Everything was perfect. We would do so many things together: we would go surfing, bowling, karting, etc. But things changed when I turned 14. I always knew that I was gay. I came out to him one day and I didn't get the reaction I was expecting. I was expecting him to understand and to tell me that it was okay and that he still loved me...but he didn't. Instead, he said that he never wanted to see me again, that I was a shame for the whole family and I was no longer his son. I've never felt so abandonned in my whole life. I lost my father and my best friend that day. It affected me in so many ways. I lost all my self-confidence, making my old friends run away from me...so yeah. I'm a disgrace to my father.'' Ashton explained.

Why do parents need to be such jerks? Just don't have kids if you are not ready to accept them just the way they are. That explains why so many kids commit suicide those days. They are not accepted. If Ashton's father was in front of me right, I swear I would hurt him nice and good.

''He's a jerk you know? Don't listen to him. He's an asshole. It's perfectly fine to be gay, it's okay to be you Ash,'' I replied sincerly.

''Yeah, now I know it. But at first, I hated myself so much for being who I am. But little did I know that being gay wasn't something I could change and I began to accept it,'' Ashton replied.

I caressed his curly hair to make him know that he was okay. I got to know that playing with his hair was the best way to make him feel better. I don't mind, I love his curly hair, mostly when he wears a bandada. It looks hot on him.

''So, what about the Karting? I would understand that you prefered not to go because of your father...'' I proposed.

''No, I think we should. Let's go have fun, like you always say,'' Ashton replied.

Ashton turned off the TV and I followed him in the kitchen. We grabbed our wallets and cellphones. Ashton borrowed his mother's car keys, he didn't have to ask her anymore. We hopped into the car and made our way to this Karting place. I've been to a place like this once after getting my driver's license, and it was very nice.

We spent the fifteen minutes drive singing along to mainstream songs on the radio. I found that Ashton had a really nice voice even though he was joking around. I'm pretty sure that his voice would be amazing if he sang seriously. Maybe not better as me though, I'm fantastic.

When we got there, we paid for entries. We opted for two races so it only cost us 20$ each. We got a little formation along with 6 other boys before we could actually race. Since we both had our license, we could use bigger and nicer karts. The formation was so boring that even Ashton wasn't paying attention.

Twenty minutes later, the eight of us were ready to race. We followed the intructor to the racetrack. We got in our karts and the intructor gave us two more tips for our security.

Then, the countdown started. This was exciting.

10.

9.

8.

7.

''I'm so going to beat you,'' I told Ashton whose kart was next to mine.

''You wish,'' he replied laughing.

4.

3.

2.

1.

BEEEEEEEEP.

The race lasted 10 laps. As soon as it started, I was in first place, Ashton not that far behind me. I enjoy the feeling of driving, mostly when I can go fast. Everytime Ashton would try to take the lead, I would block him. I was so going to win this.

There was one lap left to the race. I knew that I would win. I maybe was a little too confident. At the last turn, I bumped into one of the obstacles. I was fast to get back on the track, but since I lost all my speed, Ashton overtook me and won the race and I ended up in second place.

''I told you I was going to win this,'' Ashton said smiling as we waited for the others to end the race.

''Hey, I would have won if it wasn't for that stupid barrel,'' I replied.

''I still won,'' Ashton said happily.

This was better than victory. Seeing Ashton being that happy with a gorgeous smile on his face was better than winning the race. For once, I was truly seeing a happy Ashton and I adored it. This image will never leave my mind.

''I'm going to win the second one, you'll see,'' I teased.

''I have an idea: Loser of the next race buys the other his food at McDonald,'' Ashton proposed.

''Deal. You're going down baby,'' I accepted.

''We'll see about that,'' he replied.

*****

''I hate you,'' I said as I was paying for both our food at McDonald. That was our deal: winner of the second race gets free food. Ashton finished first while I finished in fifth place.

''Not my fault that you can't beat the amazing Ashton Irwin,'' Ashton teased.

''Calm you tits, princess,'' I replied laughing.

''I'm a beautiful princess,'' Ashton said.

''You wish,'' I replied, throwing some french fries at him.

We sat at a table and ate our food. I wasn't a fan of fastfood, but that is where Ashton wanted to go. And I didn't want to object. I wanted him to be genuinely happy for the rest of the day.

''Thanks for today, Luke. I had a lot of fun,'' Ashton said smiling.

''Anytime. I had a lot of fun as well...even though I lost both races,'' I replied.

''You're such a bad loser,'' he joked.

''You're such a bad winner,'' I replied.

''Would you like to go surfing tonight? I heard the waves are going to be awesome!'' Ashton proposed.

Surf, I've never surfed before. I sure would look like and idiot, and I don't like that. But this time, I was going to make an exception because of Ashton. I felt myself wanting to spend more time with him.

''Sure, why not? I've never surfed before, do you think you can teach me?'' I said.

''Wow, finally something that I'm better at than Luke Hemmings,'' Ashton teased. ''Of course I'll teach you, princess. You'll see, surfing is very fun. It is hard at first, but once you get the hint, it becomes natural''

It wasn't a typical day for me. I wasn't used to just hang out with friends doing normal things. I normally just get high, vandalize places and other activies that I thought were the funniest and the coolest things in the world.

But after my not over yet day spent with Ashton, I realized that I might have been wrong for all those years. Maybe this day spent with Ashton just hanging out was the true definition of fun. I thought I was the one who had to teach him some things. In the end, I think I have a lot to learn from him.

Chapter Text

''Still going to Michael's place?'' Ashton asked as I was sneaking out of the window. I thought he was asleep but I was wrong.

''Eum, yeah,'' I answered. ''Why?''

''You went yesteday. I'm starting to believe that you two are more than friends with benefits, you know? You seem to miss him a lot,''Ashton said happily.

''Shut up Ash,'' I replied laughing. ''You know that I don't relationships. I don't like Michael. I only love what he can give me.''

''How could I forget that detail?'' Ashton teased. ''Enough talking, you go do whatever you need to do. We're still going to surf again tomorrow after the job, right?''

''Of course! I had fun the other night. I'll see you tomorrow Ash, good night,'' I said before jumping out of the window.

I lied to Ashton. I wasn't going to meet with Ashton. I was going to do something evolving Michael that could get me into major trouble. But it was so tempting that I accepted Michael's offer. It might get me in trouble, but it was worth the risk.

*****The Previous Night****

''I wish I had money to buy all the weed in the world,'' I said as I took a puff from my second joint that night.

''Poor little Luke,'' Michael teased. ''If only you had money like I do.''

''Don't be mean Mickey or you won't get any tonight,'' I replied.

''Relax Mr. Grumpy, I think I have an idea,'' Michael said. ''An idea that could give you free weed all summer long.''

''Whatever it is, I'm in,'' I replied. I would honnestly do anything for free weed. I guess you can call me an addict.

''Okay, so I get my weed from this guy, Jake. He hands me free weed as long as I sell some for him. He gets the money and he pays me back in weed. I could send him a quick text asking if you could help me sell it. And he would pay you back the way he does with me. What do you think?'' Michael proposed.

''So you want me to sell weed?'' I wondered.

''Yup. It's not that difficult. You just need to make sure you don't get caught by the cops. And if you ever do, don't ever mention Jake's name or he'll send a bunch of people after you. So, are you in?'' Michael replied.

I thought about it a little. The risks of getting into trouble were high. Was I ready to risk to get arrested? What a stupid question, of course I am. I'm ready to live dangerously if that gives me free weed for the entire summer.

''Yup, I'm in,'' I affirmed.

****Back to the Present****

Jake agreed to me helping Michael sell drugs for him. That is why I found myself walking into a dark alley where I was supposed to meet with some guy. I didn't know his name, he didn't know mine. We just both knew what each other looked like.

I knew this would be easy. I just had to wait for this guy to show up. He would give me the money and I would give him his stock. That's simple. Being in a dark place in the most dangerous neighborhood of town would make this whole thing even easier.

I waited 10 minutes until I spotted someone walking towards me. He was tall and fat. He was my guy. I was a little nervous, this was my first time doing this after all. It would get easier with time.

''You have the money?'' I asked quietly when he was just a few inches away from me.

He nodded and handed me a large amount of cash. I checked if it was the correct amount and if the bills were fake. Everything seemed just fine.

I grabbed a small bag from my backpack and handed it to him. He nodded and smiled.

''Same place next week?'' He asked quietly.

''Yup,'' I answered.

I thought we would leave, but he didn't. He was not moving and his eyes seemed to be fixing something behind me. Maybe that was just a side effect of him being high.

''Shit,'' he whispered.

He dropped the bag of weed on the ground and ran away from where he came from earlier. What was that? Why did he just ran away without his order? This was just weird.

As I picked up the bag on the ground, I felt a cold hand on my shoulder. I pushed the hand away immediately. I turned around and saw someone I wasn't expecting to see.

''You, young man, are in big trouble,'' the officer said as he handcuffed me. ''You thought you could do illegal stuff like that and not get caught?''

''I don't know what you're talking about, dude,'' I replied, not caring at all that he was a figure of authority and that being rude towards him could cause more problems.

''I would remain quiet if I were you. I'm bringing you to the police station. We'll see what we'll do about you when we get there,'' The officer said.

I soon realized that all of this was real and that I should do as he says. All I wanted to do was to punch Michael. He said that it would be easy and that I wouldn't get into trouble. I should not have listened to him.

The police officer grabbed my arm and leaded me to his car. He opened the door and roughly pushed me into the backseat. What a jerk.

I tried to look confident as he was taking me to the station. I was trying to hide the fear building inside of me. I was scared. This had nothing to do with all the kinds of trouble I've got myself into before. I was being arrested, having no single idea about what would happen to me.

We reached the station ten minutes later. The officer took me out of the car, once again roughly, and led me inside of the station where I was put in a cell. Why was this happening to me?

Would they call my father? Would they put me in jail? Would they send me to juvie? So many questions were popping into my mind. I was going crazy.

Another officer came back five minutes later and asked me a few questions. He seemed nicer than the previous one.

''Your I.D. tells me that your name is Lucas Robert Hemmings and that you are 17 years old, is that correct?'' He asked.''

I could have messed with him, but I decided that being serious was the right thing to do at the moment.

''Yes,'' I replied.

''The report said you got caught picking up a bag of marijuana in the Gibson Alley. It says that you were probably selling in to another guy who ran away from the scene. Is that correct?'' He asked.

The world probably kept playing into my head. That means the officer didn't exactly caught me selling drugs, he just assumed I was.

''You don't have any proof that shows that I was selling it,'' I replied.

''Well, if you weren't selling them, care telling me what you were doing in that alley? What explains the 200$ that we found in your jacket's pocket?'' The officer wondered.

I thought about it and came out with a believable story.

''Well, I met that guy at a party three days ago. He seemed to be a pretty nice guy so I gave him my number and he did the same. He called me tonight from a confidential number saying he wanted to meet me in that alley and that he had something to propose me. So I showed up and he did as well. He wanted me to sell drugs for him. I kept saying that I didn't want to, but he was very persuasive. That is why he put $200 in my pocket, so I would accept his offer. I was about to say yes, but I didn't get to because he ran away when he saw the policeman, dropping the bag of weed on the way. The officer saw me picking it up and must have assumed that I was selling it to him,'' I explained.

Even myself believed in my story. I hoped the officer would as well.

''So you're telling me you never intended to sell weed to this guy?'' He asked.

''No, this wasn't what I was doing,'' I lied.

''I believe in your story. I won't investigate any longer since it's your first time being arrested. But I have one condition.'' The officer said.

''What is your condition?'' I asked nervously.

''You must tell me who is your friend. What's his name?'' The officer asked.

I didn't really know what to answer, but one name came into my mind. I didn't hesitate in saying it out loud.

''Michael Clifford, his name is Michael Clifford,'' I answered.

I knew I would be in so much trouble for giving Michael's name, and the he probably would get into trouble as well... but at the moment the only person I cared about was myself.

''Thanks son! You can call your parents and ask them to pick you up and pay for your $300 caution. Since you happen to already have $200, they'll just have to pay $100,'' The officer said.

I forgot about that.

''Eum, I don't speak to my parents anymore. I live with my 20 years old step-brother,'' I lied.

''Okay, if he can pay for your caution, it is fine,'' he said. ''Use the phone in your cell to call him.''

Luckily, I remembered Ashton's number by heart. I knew he would be pissed off for being waken up at 2am. He certainly would be mad after him, but he was my only hope. I hoped he would understand.

I dialed his number, hoping he would picked up his phone. I was about to lose faith when I heard his sleepy voice.

''I don't care who this is, this better be important if you're waking me up in the middle of the night,'' Ashton said.

''Eum, it's Luke. I need your help,'' I replied.

''What did you do, Luke? Where are you?''Ashton asked.

''I'm at the police station. I can't get out unless you come and pay $100 for my caution so I can get out. I'll explain everything later, please, just please come pick me up,'' I pleaded.

''Shit, Luke. Okay, I'll be there as soon as I can. And you better tell me everything when I get there. See you soon,'' Ashton said before hanging up.

Thanks God, he was coming. I don't what I would have done if he hadn't agreed to help me. I'm lucky to have him in my life, he's a nice guy.

Fifteen minutes passed before Ashton was finally there. He didn't seem happy. He looked at me and I could feel that he was very disappointed in me.

''You're free to go kid. But I'm warning you, if any of my men ever spot you doing suspicous activies, you won't get out of it so easily, understand?'' He asked.

''Yes. Thanks officer,'' I replied.

Ashton didn't even speak to me. I followed him to his car, feeling very bad. The silence was broken when we got on the road.

''I thought you were at Michael's. What the fuck have you beein doing tonight Luke?'' Ashton asked.

''Eum, I was selling weed,'' I replied. I didn't want to lie to Ashton any longer.

''You were what? How did they even agree to let you go that easily?'' he asked angrily.

''Yeah...I kind of invented a big story and might have put Michael in trouble with it. They believed I wasn't selling anything, so they let me go,'' I answered.

''I can't believe this. So you're saying I had to pay $100 I was saving for school because you are stupid enough to sell weed?'' He asked.

''I'm sorry Ashton, I-I didn't know who else to call. I even was suprised that you accepted to come to the station to get me out of there,'' I answered sadly. ''I'm going to pay you back, I promise.''

''Therer was no way I was going to leave you there. And this isn't just about money, Luke. There could have been bigger consequences to yours actions. You could have been sent to juvie or stuff like that. Damn, what were you thinking?'' Ashton said.

''I know I'm stupid okay? I was only thinking about the rewards I would get by selling weed. I never though I would get caught. I'm sorry, I'm freaking sorry that my stupid self made you lose a hundred dollars. I'm sorry,'' I replied. ''You won't tell the parents, will you?''

''Even though I should, I won't. You sure are stupid, but I still care about you. Just...promise me you won't do anything like that again? You could have get hurt Luke. Please, promise me this was the last time?'' Ashton demanded.

''I promise,'' I replied.

Not a word was said after this. It was complete silence, an uncomfortable one. I'm glad Ashton won't give up on me. I would deserve it. I'm not a good friend for him.

When we finally reached the house, I felt that I had to speak again.

''Thanks again, Ash. I really appreciate what you did for me tonight,'' I said, looking at him in directly in his beautiful eyes.

''It's no problem Luke. I'm here for you. Just don't do anything silly ever again,'' Ashton replied smiling.

''I'm going to pay you back someday, I promise,'' I mentionned. Where would I find that money, I had no idea. Maybe I could find a part-time job for the time I had left in Florida.

''I don't want money, Luke,'' Ashton replied.

''How am I going to make it up to you if I can't pay you back?'' I wondered.

''Kiss me,'' Ashton replied.

Did I hear that right? Did Ashton Irwin really asked me to kiss him? I wasn't going to refuse his offer.

I cupped his cheek and leaned in so I could plant my lips on his. They were just the way I thought they were: soft and sweet. Ashton kissed me back. It wasn't an intense kiss, it wouldn't lead to a makeout session. It was sweet and tender, and it felt good.

Ashton was the one to break the kiss, too quickly for my own good.

''Thank you,'' he said smiling as he got out of his car.

I could feel an unknown sensation in my stomach. I could not stop smiling. I could not stop thinking about how good his lips felt on mine.

Wait. Did kissing Ashton really made me feel that good? What was that supposed to mean? I didn't know what was happening to me, but I couldn't deny those butterflies in my stomach. And honnestly, they felt great and new.

Chapter Text

Another week went by and nothing much changed. It was the same old stuff as before. I was still going to work everyday and was spending most of my free time with Ashton since I didn't want to hang around Michael anymore.

Dear Ashton. He started acting weird around me after we kissed in his car the night he picked me up from the station. I thought it was absolutely adorable, just like everything else about him. He would avoid looking at me in the eyes and he would blush everytime I said nice things to him.

It is no suprise that the kiss was never mentionned again though. And honnestly, I wished we had talked about it after it happened because I truly enjoyed it and I found myself craving for his lips the entire week that followed that special moment.

I didn't know why I couldn't stop thinking about that kiss. What made it so special? I kissed many boys and girls in my life and I've never made a big deal about it. A kiss never meant anything to me. It was only for the fun of kissing to whatever it would lead to. Why was it different with Ashton? Why did I find myself wishing I could kiss him over and over again?

Maybe I liked him, maybe I liked Ashton more than a friend... No, impossible because Luke Hemmings has never liked people that way, he has never let anyone in and has never broken down his walls for anyone. It wouldn't be any different with Ashton. Ashton couldn't have changed me that much. I couldn't let that happen, people can't change me.

As for Michael, he tried to contact me more than once, but I wouldn't answer his calls or reply to his multiple messages. He first wanted to make sure I was okay since he heard about the police thing. He felt bad about it and wanted to make sure I wasn't in big trouble. How nice of him... He also wanted me to come to his house and have our little dose of fun. I resisted even though it was very tempting. Maybe something else was stopping me from going to him...or someone.

Fortunately he stopped texting after a few days. He must have realized that I wasn't going to answer anytime soon and he got bored. He must have already found another pretty guy to get in his bed by now.

I think thhe main reason I didn't want to hang out with him anymore was because of what I told the cops. I knew it wouldn't be long until he would hate me. My fake story put him in major trouble when he didn't do anything wrong, well almost.

I needed time to be on my own. Since Ashton wanted to be on his own to play the drums a little, I took it as an opportunity to go in the small park near the beach. I needed to think about everything: Ashton, Michael, myself. So much happened in my life. So many events that I wasn't used to happened and it felt weird.

Then, two guys I have never seen before showed up in the park and walked in my direction. They were big and tall and wear wearing baggy clothes along with gold chains and rings. They scared me a little to be honnest. But I didn't make a big deal about it. Maybe they just wanted to hang in the park as well. I was wrong.

I didn't see it coming. Little did I know that one of the guys grabbed me by the collar while the other one punched me right in the face, just under my left eye. It thought it would stop there. Unfortunately, it didn't.

The bigger guy let me fall to the ground. I lightly knocked my head on the banch in the process. Then, they started to kick every single part of my body. They mainly kicked in the ribs, the face and the stomach since those body parts are the ones that cause the most pain.

I've been beaten in the past, but never as much as I was being beaten at the moment. I tried not to cry, but it hurt too much that I soon turned into a sobbing mess. What have I done to those guys to deserve all of this violence? I was just sitting by myself, daydreaming. I wasn't hurting anyone, was I?

After what seemed like an hour, the beating finally stopped. I had blood all over my face and I felt broken. I felt like my entire body was broken.

"That is what you get when you try to mess up with Michael. Did you really think that you could get away withtout any consequences, you stupid liar? If you tell anyone about what happened tonight, we are going to end you for good, loser," one of the guys said.

They left the park as their job here was done. They were leaving me on my own, crying and unable to move.

It all made sense to me. This was Michael's revenge. I knew it would happen. I had it coming, this was all my fault. I deserved it. I tried to stand up, but everything in me hurt so I gave up.

I needed help. I needed someone to bring me back home. I was so scared those guys would come back. The only person I could call was Ashton.

Just grabbing my phone in my front pocket caused me absolute pain. I dialed Ashton's number, hoping that he would be done playing the drums so he could hear his phone rang.

"Luke?" he asked. Thanks God he answered.

"H-help me Ash," I replied. "I-I can't move."

"Luke, what happened? Where are you?" Ashton asked nervously.

" I can't t-tell you or they'll kill me Ash... I'm in the p-park by the beach. Please h-help me," I answered.

"Hold on, I'm coming," he said before hanging up.

I kept crying, being very thankful that Ashton answered my call. If he hadn't, nobody would have found me and I would have been stuck on the cold ground all night long.

Five minutes later, I saw Ashton's car, well his mother's. He got out of it and his eyes found me in a second. He ran in my direction. He was panicking.

"Oh my, Lukey! What happened to you?" he asked sadly as he kneeled next to me.

"I got b-beaten up for being the stupid guy I am," I replied.

"Lukey, you're covered in blood and bruises. You need to tell the police, we need to get you you the hospital," Ashton said nervously. I could see his eyes were getting watery.

"No, please, just bring me home... Please Ash, I just want to go home, clean up and sleep... Please..." I begged.

"Okay, but I'm taking you to the hospital first thing tomorrow," he agreed.

He helped me to stand up. The pain was intense, I could barely make a move without crying in pain, even with Ashton's help. It took us more than 5 minutes to reach his car because every step I took was too painful to be true.

When we finally reached his car, he opened the passenger's door and helped me get in it and buckle myself up. When he was done, he ran to the driver's side of the car and got in it. He saved me.

"T-thanks for p-picking me up Ash, you're always there when I need you, you're like a guardian angel," I said as we hit the road.

"You're more than welcome. Serioulsy Luke, I'm so sorry about whatever happened to you, you didn't derserve that at all, I'm so freaking sorry. I wish I could have had stop it," he replied sadly.

"It's okay Ash, at least you're there now,"I assured him.

The last thing I wanted was to make him feel guilty. He had nothing to do with this except being the one who saved me.

"No Luke, it's not. I just care about you so much and seeing you all covered in bruises and blood breaks my heart more than anything. Someone as beautiful as you doesn't deserve this. I wish I could take your pain away, Luke..." Ashton said before he started crying heavily.

We finally got home and fortunately, the adults were asleep. I wouldn't have wanted them to ask dumb questions about where I was and what happened to me. I didn't want anyone to know about my condition but Ashton. He was the only person I could really trust.

Ash took me upstairs. We had to stop at each step of the staircase because it was too painful for me. When we finally reached the top, he led me to our bathroom and locked the door behind us. He made me seat on the counter and began taking off my shirt and my pants.

He had calmed down, but the tears came back as he scanned my body. The view truly was horrible. I could see myself in the mirror in front of me. It was scary and worst than I thought it would be. I had bruises everywhere: my face, my stomach, my arms, my legs... My face was covered in blood due to the amount of blood that came out of my nose. I understood why Ash was crying, I would have done the same if I had been in his pants.

He grabbed a small towel in the drawer and rinsed it with cold water. Carefully, he removed all of the blood that was on my face. It hurt, but it wasn't too bad. I just appreciated what he was doing for me when he didn't have to do it at all. He truly was an amazing guy.

Not a word was said, there wasn't any place for a discussion. When he was done cleaning my face, he did something I didn't expect him to do. As he kept crying, he started kissing tenderly every single one of my bruises, not missing a single one. It was not going to make them go away, but it felt good. His affection and his tenderness made me feel a little bit better.

He gave me a small smile and I smiled back the best that I could. He helped me get down from the counter and led us to our bedroom. I was exhausted, but I didn't want to be alone. I needed more comfort. He helped me lay down under the sheets of my bed beforeputting them back on me. As he was about to leave my side to get in his own bed, I weakly grabbed his hand.

''Sleep with me, please? I-I don't want to be alone,'' I demanded.

He nodded and got under the sheets, by my side. He lightly took me in his arms as if I was a fragile doll he was afraid he would break. He cared so much about me, I could feel it. His eyes were locked on mine and I could see so many great things in them. I could get lost in them. I couldn't deny it anymore.

I was starting to really really like Ashton. I could see so many beautiful things in him. He was always there for me, he wasn't judging me. He accepted me the way I was. I always found myself wanting to hang out with him. The moments I feel the most appreciated and great are when I'm with him. I needed him more than I could imagine.

If someoe had told me I would have been doing this thee months ago, I would have laughed. But it was different now, I wanted it. That's how I wanted it to be. I lightly pressed my lips on Ashton's. My move took him by surprise but he found himself kissing me back in a matter of seconds. It was just a sweet and tender kiss. It didn't hurt at all. It felt so right and comforting. I knew that this was where I should be and where I wanted to be.

''Thank you for everything Ash,'' I whispered as his lips left mine.

''I'll always be there for you Luke, you mean so much to me,'' he replied.

''You mean so much to me too,'' I said.

He pecked my lips once more, caressing my cheek lightly. It sent lots of tiny butterflies down my stomach. I didn't want those butterflies to fade away. I was already getting addicted to them.

And with that, we both fell asleep. He made it, Ashton made it. He made me want to be good, he made me want to be a better person. And for him, I truly was ready to do everything it would take to make him happy. I knew Ashton was too good for me and that he deserved someone who's way better than me, but I didn't want to let him go, not anymore.

For the first time of forever, I cared about someone that wasn't me. For the first time in forever, I had true feelings for someone. And I wouldn't have it any other way.

Chapter Text

I had the best of dreams that night. I dreamed that I fell asleep in the arms of the most beautiful guy I've ever seen. I dreamed that I kissed this perfect guy twice and that I truly enjoyed it. I had the most beautiful dream about Ashton. I found myself wishing that it could be all real and more than a simple dream.

I woke up and realize that it wasn't just a dream. It was real life. Ashton was in my bed and we were cuddling. I should have been freaking out, but I didn't. I didn't want to push him away. For once, I decided to follow my heart. I decided that I didn't want to refrain myself from falling for someone anymore. I was falling for Ashton and I didn't want to stop it.

My friends back home would say that it was completely crazy of me to limit myself to one guy when I could get as much fun, maybe even more, from different people every night. For once, I didn't care about their opinion. That is not what I wanted anymore. Maybe it was time for me to grow up and face the truth. It was time for me to accept that I could like someone and that life wasn't just about sex.

I found myself wanting to share something bigger with Ashton. I didn't want just to have sex from him. I wanted to start something new with him. Dare I say it...a relationship? The idea scared me because I had never been in a relationship before. I didn't know the things someone should do when he realizes that he likes someone more than a friend. Those feelings were new to me, but I didn't want them to leave me anymore.

I looked at Ashton who was peacefully sleeping next to me. I couldn't help myself from smiling as I thought about the previous night where he took care of me. He was so affectionnate and careful in his gestures. I also smiled as I thought about how amazing it felt when his lips met mine. They just seemed to fit perfectly like two puzzle pieces. Plus, they tasted a mix of strawberries and banana. Delicous.

Finally, I was smiling because of how cute he looked while sleeping. I found myself wishing I could wake up to this lovely image every morning. I lightly caressed his cheek, admiring him. Unfortunately, my gesture was enough to wake him up.

''I'm sorry Ash, I didn't mean to wake you up,'' I apologized as I kept caressing his cheek.

''It's okay. How are you feeling this morning? Do you feel like we should go to the hospital?'' he asked.

I was too focused on Ashton that I forgot about my state and how badly I got beaten up. Everything hurt, but I knew I would live. I didn't feel like anything was broken and I knew the bruises would fade away with time.

''I've been better, but I'm okay. Thanks for asking, you're sweet. Did you sleep well?'' I replied.

''More than ever. Maybe it's due to the fact that a certain guy was sleeping next to me, just maybe,'' Ashton said smiling.

''Oh, who's that guy, do I know him?'' I teased.

''Well, he's taller than me. He has blonde hair, a smile to die for and beautiful blue eyes. He's younger than me and he's kind of a troublemaker, but that just makes him even cuter. He has a lip ring that looks very hot on him. His name is Luke. I think you know him,'' Ashton said.

''Oh, you were talking about me? Why didn't you say it earlier?'' I replied laughing.

Ashton rolled his eyes before he planted his lips on mine. I found myself kissing back. This guy truly changed me, but I didn't mind. I loved what he was doing to me. I just hoped that it would not end in me breaking his heart, I wouldn't forgive myself.

''Morning breaths are gross, you're lucky you're cute,'' Ashton said as his lips left mine.

''You're cuter,'' I replied. That was too cheesy. What happened to young rebel Luke who was careless and disgusted by affectionate people ?

He pecked my lips once more just for a second before he pulled away. I was getting addicted to him very quickly. I wasn't used to this, but I wanted to let myself fall. I wasn't afraid, I knew he would catch me back. He was the only I wanted to be caught by.

''Want to go eat breakfast?'' Ashton proposed. ''Don't worry about your face, the parents won't be home until tomorrow in the evening. We have the whole house to ourselves, do you know what it means?''

''Sex!'' I replied. Why did you have to say that, Luke? Guess old habits can't go away in a blink of an eye.

''Nice try, but no,'' Ashton replied laughing. '' I was thinking about doing a Supernatural marathon since you seem to enjoy this serie just as much as I am.''

''That's the best idea you've ever had Ash,'' I replied. Supernatural is life.

''I always come out with good ideas Lukey, you'll get used to it. So, what do you want to eat for breakfast?Eggs? Pancakes? I'll cook you anything that you want,'' Ashton proposed.

''Pancakes! I love pancakes,'' I replied happily.

''Pancakes it is,'' he said. ''Maybe you should go take a quick shower while I cook. I heard cold water makes bruises less painful.''

I nodded and headed to the bathroom. It still hurt to go up the stairs, but it was tolerable. The pain was nothing compared to the one I felt the previous night. I grabbed clean clothes in my room before going into the bathroom.

I was facing the huge mirror. I honestly looked horrible. Half of my body was a mixture of blue and purple bruises. Those guys beat me well. Luckily, Ashton wasn't the type of guy to judge someone by their physical beauty. He didn't seem disgusted when he looked at me because he knew that beauty wasn't just about the looks. Unlike the rest of the world, he could see good qualities in me, he saw me as good person. Plus, he said I was cute.

Ashton was right; the cold water made me feel better. I put my baggy pants on along with a large Blink-182 hoodie. Tight clothes would make my whole body hurt more, so I opted for comfortable ones. I went back downstairs and it smelled so good.

''Take a seat, I'm almost done,'' Ashton said happily as he saw me.

A few minutes later, he was joining me at a table with a huge pile of pancakes. There were fruits, Nutella and maple syrup on the table. I knew this would be delicious.

''Thank you Ash, this is very sweet of you,'' I said.

''My pleasure. Come on, eat before the pancakes get cold,'' Ashton said.

I didn't need to be told twice. I grabbed a first pancake and gobbled it in thirty seconds. Ashton was looking at me, laughing.

''Hey, I was hungry. Don't juge, you're mean,'' I said in a fake sad tone.

''Aww sorry princess, did I hurt your feelings?'' He teased.

''Shut up, Irwin,'' I replied.

''Make me, Hemmings,'' Ashton teased.

I grabbed the jar of Nutella. I plunged my fingers in it. Once they were fully covered of this delicious spread, I pressed them against Ashton's lips.

''Don't lick it or they're will be consequences,'' I warned him.

I licked what was left of Nutella on my fingers before I attacked Ashton's lips full of Nutella. He wasn't talking anymore, was he?

''Awesome way to shut me up, I'll give you that, Hemmings,'' Ashton said.

''I'm not done yet, I missed a spot,'' I replied before planting my lips back on his.

I lied when I said I missed a spot. I just wanted to kiss him more, as simple as that. Ashton wasn't complaining either. He was kissing me back with just as much enthusiam. Never would have thought that it would be possible to get that addicted to someone's lips. Blame it on Ashton, he was responsible of my addiction.

''You should make me shut up more often. I wouldn't mind it,'' Ashton said, breathing heavily.

''Anytime Irwin,'' I replied smiling.

We went back to eating our pancakes. I must have eaten 7 more, making it a total of 8 pancakes. What can I say? Ashton's cooking skills were simply awesome.

''Ready for some Supernatural?'' Ashton asked as we were cleaning the dishes. When I said that he changed me, I meant it. He even got me to wash the dishes.

''Never been more ready,'' I answered.

Since the parents weren't home, we decided to do our little marathon in the living room since the TV was bigger and that the couch was more comfortable than our beds. Usually, we would sit on both ends of the couch, but i was different this time. I had one arm wrapped around Ashton's waist as his head was laying on my shoulder. I held one of his soft hand with my free one.

We remained in that position for hours, watching episode after episode. This serie was too good to be true. I shipped Castiel while Ashton didn't.

''No, you need to ship Ashtiel,'' Ashton said as I turned off the TV. We must have watched 15 episodes non-stop and I wouldn't stop pointing out every Castiel moments.

''Ashtiel?'' I wondered.

''Yeah. Ashton+Catiel =Ashtiel,'' Ashton replied.

''You're dumb,'' I said laughing.

''You're just jealous because I took Castiel away you,'' Ashton said.

''No way. I have Dean. Keep Castiel,'' I replied.

''Fine,'' Ashton said.

''Fine,'' I replied.

I placed a small kiss on his forehead because he was too cute to be true. I found it adorable at how immature he could get when he was actually older than me. That just added to all the things I liked about him.

He replied to my sweet attention by biting my shoulder.

''Hey, that hurt, what was that for?'' I asked.

''I don't know, I wanted to eat you,'' he answered.

I started laughing because he probably didn't realize how subjective his comment was.

''I'm not stopping you,'' I teased.

I guess my answer gave him the hint that I took what he said with a sexual connation. I tried not to, but it wasn't easier said than done.

''Luuuuuke, I didn't mean it like that, oh my you're such a perv,'' Ashton said timidly.

Talking about sexuality was a good way to make Ashton uncomfortable. I would be lying if I said I didn't want to have sex with Ashton at that moment. I was used to have it all the time. But a bigger part of me knew that Ashton didn't want this and wanted to respect his wishes. I knew his latest sexual experience with Calum turned out pretty bad and I didn't want to pressure him. Plus, I didn't want him to be just a casual fuck. I wanted him to be more than that.

''Sorry, it was too easy,'' I mentionned.

''I guess,'' he replied.

It was now or never.

''Hey Ash?'' I asked.

''Yes Luke?'' Ashton answered.

''I was thinking that eum, maybe we could go on a date or something when my face heals, like just the two of us. We could go to a nice restaurant and to the movies. Because like, yeah, I kind of like and you and care about you, so why not?'' I proposed

''You want to go on a date, with me?'' He wondered.

''Well, yeah I guess. You can say now if you don't want to, I'd understand,'' I replied.

''No, I'd love to go on a date with you Luke. It's just that...I thought you didn't do dates or any relationship stuff?'' Ashton said.

''Yeah, that is what I used to do. But I found myself getting more and more attracted to you. Like I said, I like you Ash. I don't know what you did, but you kind of changed me. It's scary, but I enjoy it,'' I explained.

''Well, I would love to go on a date with you as well,'' Ashton said happily.

I leaned in so I could kiss him, but he put his fingers on my lips, stopping me from kissing him.

''How am I supposed to kiss you if you block your pretty lips with your fingers?'' I wondered.

''No kiss before the first date. Come on Luke, follow the code,'' Ashton teased.

''Your loss, Irwin,'' I replied.

He took me by surprise by crashing his lips on mine. It was a short kiss, but it was long enough for me to enjoy it fully.

''I just wanted one for the go. It will be kind of hard to resist the temptation during the upcoming days,'' he said before standing and heading to the bathroom.

I was going to go on a date with Ashton Irwin, the prettiest guy on the surface of the planet. He accepted to go on a date with me. Well, being the awesome guy I am, I knew he couldn't resist me. I couldn't wait for my face to heal so we could go on this date and have a pretty good time. Oh Ashton, what have you done to me?

Chapter Text

It took a whole week before the bruises on my face and body faded completely. My father saw them since I stil needed to go to work. I lied and told him that I fell hard when I was skateboarding. He laughed and said that it was no surprise. He said that it was my fault and that I deserved it for doing stupid activites. Jerk.

Since my face looked good again, I could finally take Ashton on a date like I promised. I've been waiting for this night since I asked him if he'd like to go on one. I still couldn't believe that he said yes. He deserved so much better than me, but I would show him that I am worth it. I would show him that I could give up on my bad side and turn into the boy he deserved.

Talking about Ashton, he didn't let go of his idea of us not kissing or cuddling until the date. He said that we needed to follow the code. It was hard. We still hung out together and everytime he would smile, all I wanted was to kiss his delicious lips. Everytime we would watch TV, I would want to pull my arms around him and protect him. And I could tell in his eyes that he wanted the same things. He was just too stubborn to say so.

I planned a cute date at this fancy asiatic restaurant. Ashton being a fan of asiatic food, I thought it would be the best place to take him to. I didn't have much money, but I still had some that my mother gave me in case of big emergencies. I considered that paying dinner for the most handsome guy on the planet was en emergency. I wanted to make him happy.

The only problem was that I didn't have my licence and that I couldn't drive us there and that we would have to walk. I then realized that I had enough money to rent us a limo for the night. Nothing was too much for Ashton. I asked for the driver to pick us up at 6:00 PM since our reservation was at 6:30PM.

I was very excited for this night, and I could tell that Ashton felt the same. The parents were out so they wouldn't ask any questions. I doubted that they would be happy that their sons were going on a date. It wasn't illegal though since we didn't share any blood or DNA. Still, knowing my dad and Lorie, they wouldn't pleased by it...mostly because I was the bad guy.

It was 5:45 PM and we were both dressing up in our best clothes. Ashton would keep asking where I was taking him and what he would be doing. I wouldn't answer, I wanted to keep it a surprise. To punish me from being silent, he decided to get changed in the bathroom so I couldn't admire his body.

I opted for a pair of black skinny jeans with a red button-up long-sleeve shirt and a pair of black Converses. I wasn't used to dress up that properly, but I couldn't just go to a luxuous restaurant dressed up in my casual clothes. I admired myself in the mirror and I looked good. Ashton wouldn't be able to resist me.

When Ashton finally got out of the bathroom, I was speechless. He looked more beautiful than ever. He was wearing a pair of dark blue skinny jeans with a short-sleeve button-up shirt and a pair of black Toms. But what made him even more beautiful was the black bandada in his hair. He was perfect.

''Ready for our date, beautiful?'' I asked happily.

''I've nerver been more ready,'' Ashton answered with a beautiful smile on his face. The reason of my death would be his smile, it was to die for.

We left our room, holding hands. Just like our lips, they matched perfectly. His hand was meant to be in mine. We grabbed our jackets and left the house. The limo was there, just like it was planned. Ashton was amazed and it made me feel incredibly happy.

''You rented a limo, Luke?'' he asked happily. ''You didn't have to do this, wow.''

''I wanted to, so it would make this night even more perfect. I wanted to make you happy so I used my last savings to rent one,'' I answered.

''You didn't have to use all of your money for me Luke,'' Ashton replied.

''You're worth it, so worth it,'' I said happily.

We got into the limo and sat side by side. Just like Ashton, it was my first time being in such a big and luxuous vehicule. We didn't talk much during the ride to the restaurant. We were just looking at the environment around us and mostly, we were looking at each smiling and blushing, still holding hands. I realized how Lucky I was to seat in this vehicle. I was lucky to be with Ashton, I was lucky that he broke down my walls.

''You're perfect,'' I said quietly.

''You're perfect too, Luke. This night is going to be perfect,'' Ashton replied.

He was right. It truly was going to be perfect. As long as I had him with me, I knew that it would be perfect. He would get to know each other a little more, we would laugh and talk about random things and hopefully, the night would end by a kiss and falling asleep next to each other.

When we finally got to the restaurant, I told the driver that I would give him a call when I would want him to take us back home. Ashton and I got out of the limo and we were met by this beautiful restaurant we were goint to eat at.

''Planet Asia, really? I've never been there in years! Food is so expensive here Lukey, this is too much,'' Ashton said happily.

''Nothing's too much for you, Ash,'' I replied smiling. ''Come on, I'm starving,''

I grabbed his hand and led us into the restaurant. It was decorated in an Oriental luxuous style, it truly was fancy. Everyone else in there seemed to be rich and snob while we were just two young boys with not much money.

''I made a reservation for two persons. My name is Luke Hemmings,'' I told the hostess.

''Sure, follow me boys. I'll lead you to your table,'' she replied.

We followed her to our table. The restaurant was full of strangers and many pair of eyes were fixed on us. Some were probably judging us because we were two boys holding hands. First, they were probably judging because we didn't fit in this kind of place. Second, they were probably judging because we were gay. But I didn't care about their opinion, I only cared about Ashton and nothing else.

The hostess handed us the menus as we sat at our table. I asked for the best table in the whole restaurant and it is was we go. We were apart from everybody next to a large window where we could see the beach and the sunset. It only made this night better than it already was.

''Would you like something to drink before I take your orders?'' The hostess asked.

''Eum, I'll take a glass of water, please,'' I replied.

''And I'll take a glass of red wine,'' Ashton answered.

I gave him a surprised look and he just smiled back. I though Ashton hated alcohol, that was a surprise. This boy sure was full of surprises I intended to discover one by one.

''Okay, I'll be back soon,'' the hostess said. ''If you need anything, my name is Liang.''

I didn't see her leaving and coming back. I was lost into Ashton's eyes, just smiling and thinking about how adorable he looked.

''Are you ready to order?'' Lian asked.

''Oh eum, I'll take a regular general tao along with brown rice and fried vegetables, please,'' Ashton replied.

We didn't even looked at our menus, but I guessed he must knew what kind of food they were selling in there. I trusted him to have good tastes.

''Make it two,'' I said.

''Alright, it should be ready in about twenty minutes,'' our hostess said.

She left, leaving Ashton and I alone, in our own little world. I could feel my heart beat very rapidly, I felt extremely happy. Never would have I thought that I would be going on a date with Ashton when I first got in Florida.

''This is too perfect to be true,'' Ashton said.

''You're perfect,'' I replied. I was getting way to cheesy, but I couldn't help it.

''Stop it, you're making me blush,'' he said laughing.

''I love it when you blush, it makes you look adorable. Well, not that you don't look adorable in other circumstances, it's just that it makes you even more adorable,'' I mentionned nervously.

''And you look adorable when you get all nervous and shy,'' Ashton added, making me laugh.

We then talked about random stuff like we always did. We were so into our conversation that we didn't see Liang coming back with our food. We were in our own little world and we didn't want to let anybody in. The night was only about him and me. It was about us.

Usually, people going on dates are shy and barely know what to talk about. There are many akward moments and silence or conversations just get weird. It was different with Ashton. I felt so comfortable around him, I felt live I've known him for years when we've only known each other for a little more than a month. He knew more about me than my other friends I've known for years. He understood me more than anyone else. He was the only one who made me want to be a better person.

We talked for hours as we ate our food. Time went by so fast, it always did when we were together. When the clocked ticked 9:30PM, our waitress asked us to leave the restaurant because someone else had reserved our table for 10:00 PM. We nodded and said she would come back with the bill.

''I'm going to the bathroom,. I'll be right back,'' I told Ashton.

''Okay, make it fast, I'll miss you,'' Ashton replied.

''I'll miss you more,''I added.

I went to the bathroom and did my business as fast as I could. I also called our driver so he could pick us up when we'd get out of the restaurant. I didn't lie when I said that I would miss Ashton even more. I was gone for two minutes and I already missed his presence. This was crazy and unlike me, but I liked this new me. When I came back to our table, he had his jacket on and was ready to go.

''Calm down Ash, I still need to pay,'' I said.

''Eum, yeah. About that... I kinda pay for the whole thing,'' Ashton replied nervously.

''Ash, that was supposed to be my gift to you,'' I said sadly.

''I know Luke, but it was so expensive. I didn't want you to spend all of your money for this dinner. You already spent so much on that limo, I didn't want you to pay for everything. I'm not worth that,'' Ashton said.

''Believe me when I say that you're worth that and even more. It's okay for now, but I'm paying next time, comprendo?'' I replied laughing.

''So there will be a next time?'' Ashton wondered.

''Of course. There needs to be a next time, if that's okay for you,'' I said happily.

''I wouldn't have it any other way,'' Ashton replied, giving me small peck on the cheek.

I grabbed his hand and we left the restaurant. Our limo was waiting for us, just like I wanted to. We got in and this time, we cuddled. I missed Ashton's warmth, I missed having him so close to me. Nothing was said during the whole ride, it was a comfortable silence. I would kiss his forehead and he would kiss my cheek, it was just sweet and perfect.

When we got home, we thanked our drive and got out of the limo. I didn't want this perfect night to end, but every good thing must have an end. I knew there would be other occasions, It was my duty to make there would be another occasion. We walked to our front door, his hand never leaving mine. When Ashton went to open it, I didn't let him.

''So, this is the moment where I'm supposed to kiss you before we go our seperate ways,'' I teased.

''We live in the same house, Hemmings,'' Ashton joked.

''I'm trying to follow the code here, Irwin,'' I replied laughing.

I leaned in and tenderly kissed his lips. Butterflies errupted in my stomach, it was the best way to end this perfect night.

''I missed kissing you,'' Ashton said.

''I missed it even more,'' I replied.

We got into the house and headed to our room. I went to open the door, but this time, it's Ashton who didn't let me.

''Look, another door,'' he pointed out.

''Yeah,'' I replied smiling.

"Shouldn't you kiss me again?" He teased.

"I guess, if that's what you want," I replied.

He wrapped his hands around my neck while I wrapped mine around his waist. I planted my lips back on his. The kiss that first started sweet and G rated soon turned into a huge make-out session as our tongues fought for dominance. Fortunately, the parents weren't home so we didn't have to hide and control ourselves.

''Wow,'' Ashton said as his lips left mine, reaching for air.

''Yeah, wow,'' I replied happily.

''Seriously, thanks for tonight Luke, I had a really great time,'' Ashton said.

''So did I, thank you for saying yes to go on a date with me,'' I replied.

''How could have I said no?'' He wondered.

''Yeah, you're right. Nobody can resist me, the beautiful and awesome Luke,'' I joked.

''Shut up, Hemmings,''Ashton said.

''Make me, Irwin,'' I teased.

He shut me up the best way possible by planting his delicious lips back on mine. I opened the door to our room and led us to my bed, making us fall on it with me on top. I knew all of this wouldn't lead to anything else, and I didn't want to. I didn't want to ruin what I had with Ashton by rushing things and having sex with him too rapidly.

The rest of the night was spent making out in my bed and cuddling until we fell asleep in each other's arms. At that moment, I realized what true happiness was. Happiness was about being surronded by people who can make you feel incredible things. It was about feeling good about yourself and not being scared of showing your true self. Ashton was my little sun of happiness. He was the happiness that I have been searching for a long time. And I wouldn't let it go.

Chapter Text

I woke up feeling happy and peacful. I woke up with thoughts of the previous night and how perfect it actually was. In my head were images of Ashton and how handsome he looked in his clothes. There were also images of his pretty face looking back at mine. Finally, there were images of us kissing. Kissing Ashton felt great and amazing. It just felt so right.

That morning just comfirmed my will to wake up by Ashton's side, every single morning. He was still asleep, in security into my arms. I was glad that I didn't push him away. I was happy that a guy like Ashton actually cared about me. Sweet Ashton. He looked adorable in his sleep, just like an angel. He was my angel and I wanted to make him mine. I wanted to be his. I had fallen for him, and I had fallen hard.

The old me would have thought that this situation was ridiculous. The old me would have thought that I was stupid for falling for someone because relationships only come along with problems and drama. The old me would have laughed at how much I've changed in a small amount of time, because of a guy who was still a complete stranger not so long before.

I was breaking many promises the old me have made to himself. I was breaking my of never letting someone in, of never letting someone breakdown my walls. I was breaking my promise of never falling for someone. I was breaking the promise of never letting anyone give me any kind of affection that wasn't sex for the pleasure of sex. There were so many promises the old me would have never broken.

But the old couldn't control me anymore. The old me couldn't stop me from doing whatever I wanted to do. I was free to do whatever I wanted to do. I didn't want to forbide myself from living amazing things anymore. I didn't want to restrain myself of falling in love. I didn't want to stop myself from making Ashton my boyfriend.

The thought sure did scared me. I knew nothing about relationships because I never actually had been in one. I've never had any boyfriends or girlfriends. It was all new to me. Ashton was the first one to make me feel things I thought didn't exist.

Ashton was the first one to show me that relationships weren't only for losers. He showed me that being with someone you like really much can be the best thing and feeling in the world. And I was glad that Ashton would be the first person with whom I would share this beautiful thing.

I didn't know how I was supposed to ask him to be my boyfriend. I didn't know if I should ask him randomly or plan something romantic where I would ask him. I was also nervous that he would say no. I was afraid that he would be scared that I would go breaking his heart since that pretty much was my reputation. But I had to ask him. For the first time in my whole life, I was about to ask someone to be my boyfriend. That was crazy, but a good kind of crazy.

I was so lost into my thoughts that I didn't even realize that the beautiful guy next to me was actually awake.

''You look beautiful when you're lost in your thoughts,''Ashton said.

''You look beautiful all the time. Slept well?'' I replied.

''How couldn't I? I had you by my side. Of course I slept well. And you, slept well?'' he asked.

''More than ever since I has you by my side,'' I answered.

I lightly kissed him, sending shivers down my spine as he kissed me back. Yeah, that truly was how I wanted to wake up every morning. I wanted to wake up next to someone I knew cared about me. I wanted to wake up next to someone who made me feel good about myself. I wanted to wake up next to Ashton for the rest of my life.

''Thanks again for last night Luke, it was an amazing night and I had a lot of fun,'' Ashton said happily.

''I doubt that you had more fun than I did. It truly was a perfect night. You're perfect,'' I replied.

''Stop it Mr Perfect. We should hang out again today,'' Ashton proposed.

''Well, that already was in my plans. Is there anything that would you like to do, beautiful?'' I asked.

''Oh, well, there's this new exhibit at the museum that seems very nice,'' he answered.

''You want to go to the museum, really?'' I wondered.

''Yeah, it's an exhibit about the historic of video games. Like we can play many different video games, old ones and new ones. It would be so nice and I know that we would have a great time. Please Lukey, please please please do this for me,'' Ashton replied.

''Fine you win. But I'm only saying yes because the exhibit is about video games and because I like you,Irwin'' I said.

''Thanks Hemmings, we'll have fun. Just wait and you will see,'' Ashton said happily before crashing his lips on mine. Well, the day already was interesting and fun. I knew it would only get better as the hours passed by.

We decided to have breakfast before heading to museum. It was a good thing because I was starving, like usual. Ashton wanted to get to the museum early because he said that there were so many games we could play that we would probably spend many hours in there. He looked so happy to go there, just like a little child going to Walt Disney World. As long as he was happy, I was happy too.

We ate breakfast with the adults. Since they were back home, we had to ask permission to go out. After giving us a 10 minutes speech that mostly was directed to me, they agreed. I still had that bad attitude towards my dad, making Ashton roll his eyes and laugh. Just because I was liking him and was nice to him didn't mean that I had to act that way with everyone. Ashton was special, he just knew how to bring the good out of me. But my dad; he wasn't special.

Ashton and I had to hide that there was something going on between the two of us to our parents. I had to keep part of my old attitude towards him but it was so hard. I used to enjoy messing with him, but I didn't like it anymore. I hated being mean towards him. But we knew that the parents would think that something was wrong if I had suddenly started to act way too friendly and stuff. We also had to sit away from each other because our body language couldn't lie.

Once we were done eating, we headed back to our bedroom to get changed. I was happy when Ashton got changed in front me and didn't hide in the bathroom anymore. I could now admire his perfect body that I have been fantasizing about. When Ashton started to get closer, I thought it would be hard to resist having sex with him, but in the end, it was easier than I thought.

Sure, there were moments where I looked at him and where I was just wanted to jump on him and go all the way with him. But I was able to control myself, because I wanted to respect him, because he was Ashton and that he meant so much more than a casual one-night stand to me.

Once we were both ready, we got out of the house and hopped into the car of Ashton's mother. Just like usual, we sang along to some songs that we both liked. I enjoyed those goofy moments spent together where we could be ourselves and just have fun. I only could do that with Ashton.

When we finally got to the museum, Ashton was all happy and jumping. He was so adorable. I didn't understand how he could be so mature yet so child-like at the same time. That was another reason why I liked Ashton. He knew when was the time to be serious, but he also knew when and how to have fun.

When I first met Ashton, I thought he was boring and didn't know to have fun. I thought I had the right definition of fun and that anybody who didn't agree with me was boring. But I was wrong, and Ashton was right during all this time. Fun can be found in the simple things. It can be find in the smallest little things, like playing video games at a museum with Ashton.

There weren't many people at the museum yet since it still was early. That meant we would have more time to play to all the games that we wanted. Even though they weren't expensive, I paid for both Ashton and mine entrances. I still was a little sad that he paid for the restaurant, but I knew that I would get other opportunities to offer him dinner or some fancy things.

Ashton was right, he always was. The exhibit was awesome. There were more than 200 videogames that we could try. For 10$, it totally was worth it. There were some Pacman games, Dance Dance Revolution, Super Mario, Rayman and so much more. I felt like I was back into my sweet childhood.

So for hours, we tried over 50 video games. Anytime Ashton lost, he would give me sad puppy eyes and I would kiss him to comfort him. I knew he actually wasn't sad, it was just a way to get me to kiss him. He was addicted, so was I. When he won, he would jump and yell in happiness. He looked extremely cute, like a minion. He was my own Minion. Yeah, museums could be fun after all.

We had time for one last game and we opted for Super Smash Bros since we were both pretty good at that game.

''Let's make this a challenge. The winner picks a consequence for the loser. Two out of three,'' Ashton proposed.

''You're in, and you're going down,'' I replied, making Ashton laugh.

As usual, I picked Link while Ashton picked the annoying little pink thing, Kirby. We had two lives each because we didn't want the challenge to last for a long time. Plus, there was going to be more people who would want to play the game.

Ashton won the first match, and I won the second one. We were into the third one and we both had one life left. I always loved competition. I never liked losing, it always pissed me off. But I decided to let Ashton win for two reasons. First, I simply adored his reactions whenever he won something. Second, I wanted to see what kind of dare he would give me.

So I let him kill me with his hammer. Just like I planned, he did this little celebration dance. This was worth more than winning.

''I won, you lost,'' he teased.

''Yup, sounds like it,'' I replied laughing.

''So, I have to give you a consequence because you're a loser,'' he joked

''Exactly,'' I replied.

''Mhmm, let me think about it,'' Ashton said.

''Give me your best shot, Irwin. I'm not scared,'' I teased.

''Be my boyfriend,'' he replied.

I didn't know if I got that right? Did Ashton really ask me to be his boyfriend? Was this real life? I was on Cloud 9.

''Hey, I wanted to be the one to ask you to be my boyfriend,'' I joked.

''So, that means you want to be?'' He wondered happily.

''Wouldn't have it any other way,'' I answered.

He gave me his best smile before wrapping his arms around my neck and kissing me tenderly. It was our first kiss as an actual couple. That was completely insane. I couldn't believe that Ashton was my first boyfriend. He was the first person to steal my heart.

''Don't go breaking my heart, okay?'' Ashton asked as his sweet lips left mine.

''I promise I'll do my best to make you happy. I know I've done nasty things in the past, but I promise that I'll never hurt you. I care so much about you, Ash. You make me a better me and I'm like the happiest boy in the world right now. This is just the beginning and we're going to enjoy every second of it. So don't you worry, you're safe with me. You'll always be safe with me,'' I assured him.

And with that, we kissed one more time. We didn't have a care in the world that people were looking at us, wheter approving or disapproving what they were seeing. Ashton was mine. I was his. That's how things were meant to be from the start. Every jock needs his little geek. And I found mine and never was going to let him go.

Chapter Text

Ashton and I have been going out for a month and everything was more than perfect. When we weren't around the parents, we would not leave each other's side. We were planning to tell our parents about us dating because we were tired to hide. They would just have to accept it because there was no way they would tear us apart.

We would go on cute dates. We would go to the movies, to the restaurant and more. We even went back to the museum because we had such a great time the other day. Or, we would just hang out in our room playing video games or watching TV series, mostly Supernatural. There were also other times where we would just cuddle and kiss for hours. What we did didn't really matter. As long as I was with him, it was perfect.

Time went by so quickly. I couldn't believe that it was already a month since he asked me to be his boyfriend. That also meant that I only had one month left in Florida until I had to go back to my hometown, Sydney. I remembered how much I didn't want to leave Sydney for the summer. And now, I didn't want to go back. I wanted to stay in Florida, I wanted to stay with Ashton. But since I wasn't 18 yet, I could not do much about it. My only plan for now was to wait until I turned 18 and come back to Florida and live with Ashton, but that was so far away from now. I hoped that Ashton and I could figured this out. But until then, I was going to fully enjoy my last month with him.

I just could not get enough of my sweet and adorable boyfriend, Ashton. I felt myself needing him all the time. I just wanted him near me every second of the day. I was getting more and more attached to him as the days went on and I liked it. Ashton could provided me those special feelings that I have tried to avoid for a very long time. I didn't want to run away from them anymore. They felt different and I was enjoying every single one of them.

He provided me security. Whenever I would be around him, I would feel safe. I felt safe about myself and about life in general. He also could provide me affection. I just couldn't get enough of his comfortable hugs and his sweet kisses. I have craved affection for years, and I finally got the perfect dose of it. He also provided me carefulness. Whenever I felt a little down or scared that something bad would happen to me, he always found the right words to make me feel that things would be okay.

But most of all, Ashton provided me something that used to be unfamiliar and unknown to me. He provided something I once thought was stupid and useless. I was wrong all the time because what Ashton provided me was the most beautiful feeling in the whole world. Ashton gave me love, pure love.

Love can be scary to people. It sure was for me. It was so new to me because I didn't have a clue of what love was. Ashton was my first boyfriend, the first person I've ever been so closed to. He was the first person to make me feel so special, to make me feel good and happy. He made me feel things that nobody else could do, he had this power on me, a good form of power.

I have formed myself an idea of what love was by the movies I've watched and the people I've seen. I knew that it was supposed to be the best and the most incredible thing in the world. I knew it was supposed to make you feel amazing. And the more I though about it, that was how I was feeling about Ashton. I was in love with Ashton Irwin.

Ashton told me that he loved me the previous week when we were on a date by the beach. Knowing that he loved me made me feel extraordinary and merry. For the first time, someone loved me for me, and just for me. I didn't say it back though. I wasn't ready and still was trying to adapt to this new way of life. I wanted to wait for when I was certain about my feelings, and I would make that moment romantic and magical, for the both of us.

Being in a relationship is very different than being a single person. Some people and the old me would say that being single is better than being in a relationship. But the new me disagreed. Because of Ashton, I've only seen positive aspects about being a couple. I wouldn't have given up my relationship with Ashton for anything in the world. He was my sunshine, my happiness. I just needed him so much.

I was finally ready to let the three magical words come out from my mouth. I was going to tell Ashton that I loved him. I was pretty nervous about it, but mostly I was excited. I was going to tell someone that I loved him for the first time in my life. That was huge to me. Being Luke Hemmings, I wanted to do it in big. I didn't want to tell him out of the blue in a random situation. I had a plan, and it sure was going to be amazing.

My father and Lorie were out of a town for an important business trip. They've been gone all week and were only coming back Monday morning. Even though I still had a bad attitude towards him, my father trusted me enough to leave Ashton and I on our own for a week because I wasn't all rebellious and nasty anymore. I had changed, Ashton changed me.

Ashton had to go in town to buy some music stuff. He asked me to go with him, but I refused because I had other things to do. At first, he was confused but he didn't ask any questions and left. I had around three hours until he would be back. I had bought all the stuff I needed the other when Ashton and I were shopping. I did it behind his back, of course. I had three hours in front of me to prepare the perfect meal: sushis. I had three hours to decorate our living room into something romantic and beautiful. I would wait for the rest.

I wasn't the best cook, but I found out that making sushis wasn't as hard as it seemed. I probably made too many, but that was better than not having enough. Then, I started decorating the living room. I lighted dozens of candles, put red petals all over the place and made us a little spot to eat in front of the fireplace. Everything was in place, only thing missing was my adorable boyfriend.

I was sitting on the couch when he finally arrived. He didn't speak a work, he was speechless. I got the reaction I wanted from him.

''Wow Lukey, this is beautiful!'' Ashton said happily as he took a seat next to me, kissing me tenderly.

''Well, Saturday is our date night, so I brought the date to us,'' I replied smiling. ''I prepared some sushis while you were gone, is that okay for you?''

''It is more than perfect, you're perfect,'' Ashton said, kissing me once again.

''You're perfect too sweetie,'' I said. ''Take a seat by the fireplace while I'll grab the sushis in the kitchen, okay?''

I stood up and headed to the kitchen. I grabbed the plates full of sushis and brought them back in the living room. I sat in front of Ashton who looked beautiful. Beautiful is not the word. He was just, wow. I placed the plates in front of us and Ashton didn't waste time in putting a first piece in his mouth. I hoped he would like them.

''Wow Luke, this tastes so good. You're so perfect, thank you,'' Ashton said.

''Anything for you, my lovely and perfect boyfriend,'' I replied.

We ate sushis for around an hour, just talking about everything and anything. It's crazy how we always had things to talk about. Some couples would have those akward silent moments, but it wasn't the case for us. We would never get bored, we were just perfect for each other. Dear Ashton, where have you been all my life?

In the end, we ate all of the sushis. I guess we were very hungry. Now was time for the second part of this perfect and life changing night. But for that, I needed to get Ashton distracted so I could prepare everything and set things perfectly.

''Hey Ashton, can you wash the dishes please? I need to use the bathroom.'' I lied. Well that was half a lie, but he didn't need to know.

''Yeah sure, but make it fast or I'll miss you too much,'' Ashton said lightly pecking my lips.

''I'll miss you more,'' I replied before going up the stairs.

We weren't allowded to go in our parent's bathroom but I broke the rules. It was necessary and well, they wouldn't do. I needed their bathroom because there was a huge bathtub in there. My plan was to turn this place into something romantic like I did with the living room and to bathe with Ashton. A part of me was afraid that he would take it as a form of pressure to have sex with me. But that wasn't my attention. I just wanted to share a romantic and intimate moment with him. I wanted to share a beautiful moments where I would tell him how I really felt.

I started by lighting up all the candles that I have disposed in there earlier. Then, I filled the bathtub with water and bubbles. I made sure to keep the water warm enough because nobody really enjoys cold water. My last step was to spread hundred of rose petals all over the room. I took one last check at my work and was very satisfied with myself. I closed the lights and all the candles made the environment look so beautiful and romantic. It was perfect.

I grabbed the rose that I have bought Ashton and hided it behind my back. I headed back to the kitchen where he was almost done doing the dishes. I could feel my heart beat so fast that even Ashton could hear it.

''You took a while up there, I'm already done,'' Ashton said.

''Sorry! Will you forgive me?'' I replied as I handed him the rose.

''You bought me a rose. Of course I forgive you Lukey, thank you,'' he said happily.

''I have one more suprise for you. Just close your eyes and don't ask any questions, okay dear?'' I asked.

''Okay, no questions,'' he answered. He closed his eyes and I grabbed his hand, leading him all the way to my little surprise.

When we reached the bathroom, everything was still in place. Everything was still impeccable. I was nervous, this was finally it.

''You can open your eyes now,'' I said calmly.

Ashton did so and his mouth dropped. He wasn't speaking. In fact, he was crying. I had messed up.

''No baby don't cry, please don't cry. I-I'm sorry,'' I said sadly.

''Why are you sorry Lukey? I-I'm crying tears of joy, this is simply amazing. I-I can't believe that you did this for me, I can't believe that you would prepare such a beautiful suprise for me. I-I'm the luckiest guy in the world to have you in my life,'' Ashton replied, making me feel a whole lot better.

''''I wanted to make this night memorable for the both of us.'' I added. ''Because you mean so much to me and that you only deserve to be treated like a prince. You mean so much to me Ashton, you're everything to me now. I'm so glad that we're together, I'm so thankful that I finally let myself be happy with you.''

Ashton gave me a big hug, one of those hugs nobody wants to end. I was right where I should be, I was with the boy I loved. I was with Ashton and that was enough for me. We began undressing each other slowly. It wasn't the first time that we would see each other naked, but it was the first that it truly would be meaningful and intimate.

I looked at my naked boyfriend and couldn't believe how perfect he was. I couldn't believe how lucky I was to be with a boy who was beautiful, on the outside and in the inside.

''You're beautiful, Ash,'' I said.

''You're perfect, Lukey,'' he replied.

We got into the bathtub and the water was, gladly, still hot enough. Ashton was between my legs, his back against my chest and his head resting on my shoulder. I took the opportunity to kiss him tenderly. I still felt those tiny butterflies when he kissed me back. I hoped that they wouldn't go away with time.

We kissed for minutes and it just felt right. Nothing else ever felt this right, absolutely nothing. Being with Ashton, just kissing tenderly and cuddling, was absolutely perfect. It was my own little paradise, he was my paradise. It was just the two of us.

''I'm so happy right now,''Ashton said as his sweet lips left mine. ''This, everything, it's perfect. Thanks for making me feel special and important. Thanks for caring about me and not giving up on me. Just thank you for being you, Luke Hemmings.''

''And thanks for being you, Ashton Irwin. I don't know what I would do if I had to lose you. I can't see my future without you in it. I need you. What am I thinking when I'm not thinking about you? Nothing. You're my everything, you're the air that I breathe. I only miss you when I'm breathing, which is all the time,'' I replied.

''I love you Luke,'' Ashton said happily.

That was finally it, that was the moment I've been waiting for all day. This was going to make us closer and stronger than we already were.

''I know...and I love you too Ashton Fletcher Irwin. I just freaking love you,'' I replied.

''Wai- what?'' Ashton wondered happily.

''I said that I love you. I love you more than anything, and I'll always will,'' I answered.

Ashton turned around so we was facing me and straddling me. He planted his delicious lips back on mine and we shared our most romantic and intimate make out session since we started dating. And at that moment, I finally understood what true love was. And I never was going to let it go.

We weren't just two guys kissing each other. We were two boys in love kissing each other, we were two boys happy to have each other and that was all that mattered. He was mine, I was his.

''Forever,'' Ashton whispered.

''Always,'' I replied.

Chapter Text

After our little romantic time in the parents bathtub, Ashton and I took our relationship to a whole new level. It just happened and I'm really glad that it did. Nobody was pressured into and we both really wanted it. And it was beyond perfect. Never have I ever imagined that it could feel that good when you do it with someone you're in love with. Never have I ever imagined that this would turn out to be the best night of my life.

Making love to Ashton probably was the best thing I've ever felt in done in my whole life. The mix of passion, lust and love made it so much more incredible and mind-blowing than just having sex with a total stranger. I was scared that my whole setup pressured Ashton, but he assured me that it didn't. In fact, I think he wanted it even more than I did. In short, it was an amazing night spent with the most beautiful and incredible young man in the entire universe. Ashton was my man and I was never going to let him go.

We decided that it was finally the right time to tell my father and his mother about us. There was no point of hidding our relationship to them anymore because it was serious. It wasn't just a joke. We really loved each other, I loved him more than anything. Ashton and I both knew that them parents would not be pleased about it.

First, both of them were not very open-minded about homosexuality. Ashton told me how his mother hated the fact that he was dating Calum in the past. And my father, well, he never liked what didn't match his standards of perfection. Second, there was also the fact that we both lived under the same roof. We weren't brothers or anything, but it still could sound weird to people since Ashton's mom was dating my dad. But we didn't care about their opinion anymore.

Since Ashton and I got together, Ashton also changed. He was still my cute little geek and nerd, but he turned into a way more confident guy. He was starting to live for himself and not for the others. The more we were together, the more he started to care about disapproval. He still wanted to be accepted, but most of all...he wanted to be happy. I was very proud of him.

''Are you ready to confront them?'' Ashton asked.

''Yeah, this has to be done. Are you?'' I replied.

''Yes, I am. I'm feeling confident about this, I owe it all to you,'' Ashton said.

I gave him one last kiss before we left our room and headed to the living room where the adults were watching some boring culinary TV show. We went in front of them, blocking them the view on the television. Ashton and I were holding hands, we finally didn't have to hide anymore.

''There is something we need to tell you,'' I said.

''Sure boys, what is it?'' Ashton's mother asked.

I was about to answer, but Ashton was faster. I was so proud of him, finally standing for himself in front of the parents. He never failed to amaze me, that's why I loved him so much.

''Luke and I are dating. He's my boyfriend and I love him. We've been dating for a little more than a month now and we're happy together. We thought that today was the right day to tell you because we are both tired of sneaking around your backs. So yeah, we're dating and we love each other,'' Ashton answered.

Silence. There was nothing but silence after Ashton spoke. Lorie and my father were both speechless. Lorie seemed to be more surprised with a little touch of anger while my dad seemed to be pretty pissed off, giving us his best disapproval stare.

''This is ridiculous. You are both joking right?'' My dad asked angrily.

Ashton lightly squeezed my hand to calm me down. He knew me to well and could see in my eyes that I was about to explode. At least I had him by my side to stop me from saying really nasty things.

''Does it seem like a joke? It isn't a joke, dad. Ashton and I are dating. He's my boyfriend and I love him. He's the best thing that ever happened to me. He makes me happy and makes me want to be a better me. I'm in love dad, you should be happy for me, for us,'' I answered calmly.

''We're sorry that we waited to tell you, we just weren't ready and we wanted to be certain that our relationship was serious. And it is. I'm happy with Luke, happier than I've ever been,'' Ashton added.

I lighly kissed his cheek, gaining a look of disgust from my father. It was Lorie's turn to be pissed off. This wasn't going as good as I wanted to.

''You do realize that you lied to us for a very long time, right?'' Lorie asked.

''Yeah mom, and we're sorry. Like I said, we wanted to wait when we were ready,'' Ashton replied.

''You're such a disgrace Ashton Fletcher Irwin. I thought that I raised you better than that. I taught you that lying was very bad and that it was for losers. And look at you, hidding something as big as that from us and going behind your back. Plus, you know how I'm not very happy that you love guys. You won't have success that way. Only men with wives and children do. Do you really want to be a failure and a shame for our family? And that's not the worst. You had to pick a trashy and rebelious guy to be your boyfriend. He's not good for you. He will only bring you down, you deserve better than him. I can't believe that you stood so low, I always taught you that what mattered was to reach the top. I'm so disappointed in you, Ashton,'' Her mother spoke as if I wasn't even there.

I thought Ashton was going to cry and apologize because I knew he hated when his mother was mad at him. He hated when he didn't have his mother's approval. But he didn't. He actually stood up for the both of us, and he did it big time.

''You know what mom? I don't care about what you think. I'm sick of you trying to control my life. I am not your puppet. I'm your son. You're supposed to support me, but all you do is make me shameful about myself whenever I do something that doesn't please. I have enough. What you just said was the straw that broke the camel's back. I'm sick of your attitude towards me. I don't care if I don't reach the top. What I want is to what I like. And what I like is music. I want to pursue a musical career wheter you like it or not. And finally, the thing I love the most is Luke. I love him mom, can't you see how happy I've been in the past month? I found my soulmate and all you can think about are your stupid glory standards. Stop treating him like he's a piece of shit. He's actually the best person I've ever met in my life. Yeah, he made mistakes, we all do. But Luke is actually the first person to make me feel good about myself. I'm in love and there's nothing you can do about it, so accept the fact that I'll never be the perfect little boy you want me to be,'' Ashton replied.

I was speechless. I couldn't believe that all of this words came out of my cute and harmless boyfriend. I knew this day would come; the day where he would have enough of all the pressure he had on his shoulders. And that day finally came.

''Look at you, Ashton. You're turning into a copy of my son, this too sad. Change your attitude and stop hanging out with him before he turns you into a lost cause like him,'' my father spoke,

''Will you both stop treating Luke like he's the worst person in the world when he isn't? I know Luke more than you both do. Luke is an amazing young guy. He's nice, he's funny, he's affectionate,he's smart and he's perfect for me. He's nothing like the horrible person you both think he is. Have you looked at yourself lately? All you do is criticize us. All you do is being disappointed in us. I'm sick of that,'' Ashton replied angrily before storming out of the room, going outside of the house.

I wanted to run after him, but I thought that he could do with some time on his own, to calm down and think about this all. I was amazed in a bad way at how our parents could be direspectful. I don't really care that they didn't like me because I didn't like them either. What I hated was the fact that they tried to make Ashton believe that I was an horrible human being. I was perfectly aware that I had flaws, but I also knew that I had good qualities. There were just more apparent and visible when I was around Ashton.

''Look what you've done to my son,'' Lorie yelled. ''Your turned him into a direspectuful man, like you.''

''I did nothing okay? Stop blaming me when I did absolutely nothing. I didn't force Ashton in telling you the things he said. He had reasons to speak the way he did. I'm the one who listened to him whenever he felt sad. I'm the one who comforted when he didn't feel good enough because you would tell him how what he did was wrong. Ashton has been following your little orders for years and I completely understand him for having enough. He is twenty years old and you're threating him like a ten years old child. Why can't you see all the beautiful things that I see in your son? Why can't you just love him the way he is? Some people should never have kids. You two are the best examples,'' I yelled.

I didn't give them time to answer. I left the room and joined Ashton outside. He was sitting in the stairs, unmoving. He was not crying though.

''Are you okay baby?'' I asked as I sat next to him.

''Yeah, I'm okay. I'm just a little mad, that's all. I thought my mother could be a little bit more comprehensive, but she isn't. But I'm just done with her drama and her problems,'' Ashton answered.

''Is there anything I can do to make you feel better?'' I asked sadly.

''I'm already feeling better now that you're here,'' he answered before kissing me tenderly.

Who could say that what we had was wrong? We were just two human beings in love with each other, happy with each other. We both found what we've been searching for a long time. We found someone to love us and accept us just the way we were. Nobody could say that there was someting bad about that.

Nobody ever defended me the way Ashton did. Nobody ever said such beautiful things about me like Ashton did. He was the only person in the world who saw the real me. He was the only person who tried to discover the real me and bring it out of his cell. Ashton was my little angel.

''What you did back there was amazing baby. You didn't have to stand up for me,'' I said.

''I had to. I won't let anybody insult you in front of me. It kills me that they can't see all of the good things that I see in you. I'm not going to let anybody insult my boyfriend. You're perfect to me. You're my everything, the air that I breathe. I just feel complete when I'm by your side. I don't care what they are going to say, all I want is you. And I'm not going to give up on you for two stupid adults who are too stubborn to see otherwise,'' Ashton replied.

''I love you, Ashton. I just love you so much. I wish that things could have gone differently back there, I'm sorry,'' I said.

''I love you even more, Luke Hemmings. But don't you worry okay? As long as we're together, everything is going to be okay. We're strong when we are together,'' Ashton replied.

He was right. As long as we would have each other, we were going to be okay. We were going to go through everything. Love made us strong. And my love for him was infinite.

''Thanks for not giving up on me,'' I said.

''Forever and always,'' Ashton replied.

Chapter Text

You know you're in love when you can't fall asleep because reality is finally better than your dreams. My reality was better than all the dreams I had in the past. Ashton was my everything better plan, my whole better reality. I was madly in love with him and it was just living a dream that never ended. He simply made me feel alive. He was my living dream, my little paradise.

We've been together for two months. Two months of pure love, happiness and peace. Those two months were the best of my life. Whatever I did, I felt happy and good about myself. Whatever happened, I could always count on Ashton. He always was there for me, just like I was always there for him. And it never was going to change.

Time passed so quickly that I didn't even realize that I only had two days left in Florida until I had to get back to my worst reality. I only had two more days to spend with Ashton until we would see each other again a couple of months again. I didn't want to go back to Sydney. I didn't want to leave Ashton behind. I got used to being with him every hour of the day. I knew I was going to feel more than empty without him by my side in Australia. Sure, we were still going to be able to call each other or Skype each other. But it wasn't going to be the same. Those things would not allow me to hug him, to kiss him or to fall asleep with him in my arms.

Things with our parents didn't get any better after our little conversation. Ashton's mother was still very pissed off. She was so disappointed in Ashton and she let him new every single day. Ashton was strong though. Yeah, there were nights where he cried himself to sleep, but I was there to comfort him. Other than that, he didn't let her affect him and he kept moving. He was strong and I was there to support him.

Ashton decided to save his money to buy himself his own place in the next months. He said that once I would turn 18, he would wait for me to move with him. I could not wait to start a living with Ashton, where it would be just us. It was going to be amazing, with nobody telling us what's wrong or right, nobody to tell us what to do.

As for my father, he didn't speak to me after our talk. He kept ignoring me and pretended that I didn't exist. I saw him at work and sometimes at home and that was it. I wasn't the son he wanted me to be, so he just gave up on me like the good father that he was. The only good thing about leaving Florida was that I would not have to see his face ever again. I hated him.

A part of me was afraid to go back to Sydney, where I would find back my old friends and my old habits. After Ashton and I got together, I didn't smoke a single joint of weed and the only alcohol I drank was the one I ordered when we went on romantic dates. At first, it was very hard to control myself, but as time went on, the addictions slowly faded away. As for sex, I was absolutely satisfied with Ashton. Everytime doing it with him was simply magical and amazing.

I knew that I would never cheat on him. I simply was afraid that being back in my old environment would bring back the bad habits: massive drug and alcohol consuption. I would need to fiight without the help of Ashton, but I knew I could do if I really wanted to. And for Ashton, I was going to.

Speaking of Ashton, we currently were at this fancy restaurant, the same one I brought him on our first date together. It was going to be our last date before a while, and we both were really sad about it. We tried to be strong about the fact that I soon would be gone, but it was harder than we thought. We were aware that it was going to be so hard to say goodbye after we spent months not leaving in each other's side.

''I wish you could stay, baby. I wish you didn't have to go, I'm going to miss you so much. You're not even gone yet that I'm already missing you. This summer went by way too fast,'' Ashton said.

''I'm going to miss you too, sweetie. I don't want to leave, I wish I could stay here with you, where I really am happy. But hey, it's just going to be a goodbye. You know that I will come back to you. As soon as I turn 18, I'm going to get on this plane and find my way back to you,'' I replied.

''I'm just afraid that you'll move on, Lukey. Three months a long period of time. Yeah, we'll have Skype, Facetime and all those other stuff, but I'm scared that you'll realize that I'm not worth it...I'm scared that you going back to Sydney will seperate us, for good,'' Ashton said sadly.

''How could I move on? There is no way I'm going to move on, Ash. Don't you know that I love you so much it hurts? This isn't going to seperate us. You have to trust me baby. I promise that I'm not going to let you down. I care too much about you and I love you so much. It will only be three months. After that, we will never be seperated ever again, I promise,'' I assured him.

''I love you so much, Lucas Robert Hemmings,'' Ashton said.

''And I adore you, Ashton Fletcher Irwin. And I always will,'' I replied.

''Until the end,'' he added.

''Do you promise to contact me at least once a day? We'll have to figure out a perfect timing because of the time zones, but yeah. I will need to talk to you at least once a day or I am going to go crazy,'' I asked.

''I pinky promise you to contact at least once day. But believe me when I say that I will probably contact you twice or thrice a day, because I'm going to miss you so much Lukey. And I also promise you to get that apartment for the both of us. It is only going to be you and me baby,'' Ashton answered.

''Until the end,'' I replied.

Some would say forever and always, but Ashton and I would always say Until the end, And there wasn't going to be an end. Not even death was going to seperate us and stop us from loving each other. Our love for each other was stronger than the power of death.

We kept eating our food, talking about our incredible summer together. So many great things happened to us this summer, it was the best vacations of our lives. From our cuddly moments in our room to our romatic dates, everything was perfect. From our time spent watching Supernatural to our time going to the museum, it was all memorable. And I owed it all to my boyfriend.

It was the summer where we both fell in love with a once to be stranger who appeared to be the love of our lives. It was the summer where I realized all the good things I had missed for so long. It was the summer where I found my true happiness. Love is a force more formidable than any other. And this force was Ashton.

''This has to be my favorite restaurant from now on,'' I said.

''I know! Their food is so good,'' Ashton replied happily.

''No, not because of their food. Well it sure is good, but that is not what I meant. It has to be my favorite restaurant because this is where I realized that you meant so much to me. It is in this very place that I realized how perfect you were for me and how much I wanted and needed to be with you. I love you,'' I mentionned.

''Why do you have to be so perfect? I'm the luckiest boy in the world to have someone as amazing as you in my life. From now on, I can't live withtout. I need your love. When everything is wrong, you always know how to make it right again. You helped me be who I am right now, because of you my life finally seems to have a purpose. You're my everything, Luke,'' Ashton replied.

I leaned it and tenderly kissed him. I was going to miss this while I would be stuck in Sydney. I would simply miss everything about Ashton. It wasn't going to feel right to fall asleep on my own, without my good night hug and kiss. But it was only going to be for three months. We could do it, love is stronger than everything.

''Hey, I'm going to go get the car. Are you sure you're okay with paying the bill?'' Ashton proposed.

''Yeah, I still have some money because you never let me pay for you. Now it's my turn,'' I replied smiling.

''Okay, well, meet my at the door in five minutes. I'll miss you,'' Ashton said.

''I'll miss you too,'' I replied.

He lighly pecked my lips before leaving the restaurant for me to pay. I was happy that Ashton finally let me pay something for him. I always felt bad that he always paid for me, but I was also very thankful. I paid for our $60 bill and headed to the exist to wait for my loved one that was supposed to be there any second now.

Five minutes later and Ashton still wasn't there. Maybe there was some traffic, we parked the car a few streets away from the restaurant. But it was late and there never was traffic at that time of the day. Maybe he just stopped by the convenience store to buy some gum since he was out of it. He was okay, I just needed to calm down.

Another ten minutes passed and there was still no sign from Ashton. This wasn't normal and I started to get worried. I tried to call him, but he didn't pick up. I texted him, but I didn't get any reply. I had no idea what was happening. Maybe he was only trying to prank me? Or maybe he was planning something romantic and needed a little time? Yeah, it had to be it. So I sat on the stairs and waited for him to pick me up with his suprise.

Two minutes later, my phone rang. Thankfully, it was Ashton. That idiot, why did he have to freak me out like that?

''Ash baby, where are you?'' I asked.

''Hello, Luke,'' someone replied. I knew that voice. It didn't belong to Ashton. Something was wrong.

''Michael?'' I wondered nervously.

''Yeah. You thought you could get rid of so easily? You thought I was only going to get you beaten up and forget about this whole thing?'' Michael replied.

''W-What do you mean?'' I asked.

''Don't play it dumb with me, Luke. What you did to me was pretty nasty. I had to spend months in that cell until I could finally get out. You're the one who put me in there. And I'm going to make you pay,'' he answered.

''You already made me pay by sending those guys to beat me,'' I replied. ''Where's Ashton?''

''That clearly wasn't enough. Oh, the handsome boy with curly hair? Yeah, he's with me. He's okay, for now,'' Michael replied.

Michael had Ashton. Michael wanted to get his revenge on me. That couldn't be real....Michael was going to hurt Ashton, so he could only hurt me better.

''What did you do to him?'' I asked angrily.

''Nothing much, just hit him behind the head. He is unconscious right now. I'm waiting for him to wake up and have you know, fun,'' Michael replied laughing.

''Don't you dare hurting him!'' I warned him.

''Seems like Luke got himself a lover. All the things I could do to him,'' Michael said.

''Don't you freaking touch him Michael,'' I yelled.

''I'll see. How about you come and join the fun, Luke? You know where to find me and don't you dare bringing someone with you. But be fast, the game begins in five minutes. If you can't make it, it'll be too late,'' Michael said before the line went dead.

I should have known that Michael was going to try to hurt me even more than he already did. This was all my fault for being stupid enough to denounce him. I made a mistake and he was going to make me pay by taking away the things I loved the most: Ashton.

There wasn't anytime to waste. My baby was in danger. My baby was in the hands of a disgusting boy. My baby was probably going to get hurt and it was all my fault. I had to stop Micheal. Because if I lost Ashton, I would also be gone

Chapter Text

Fortunately for me, Michael's house wasn't that far away from the restaurant. It actually was pretty close, thankfully. I ran faster than I've ever did before. I had five minutes to get there, not any second more. My boyfriend was in danger. He was going to get hurt and I had to stop it. I could not let Michael touch a single hair from Ashton's head. This wasn't going to happen. If he wanted to hurt him, he would have to hurt me first. I promised myself that I was never going to let anybody hurt Ashton and I was about to keep my promise by saving him from Michael.

When I left the restaurant it was exactly 10:05 PM. When I got to Michael's door, it was exactly 10:09 PM. Thanks God, I was right on time. I made it in less than five minutes just like Michael wanted me to. Whatever was the plan Michael had in mind, it would have to wait now that I was here. I knocked loudly at his door. I was pissed off and extremely worried about my precious Ashton. But I had to show a strong and confident face in front of Michael. I could not let him see my vulnerable side.

''Open the freaking door Micahel Clifford or I swear I'm going to murder you,'' I yelled.

10 seconds later, the door opened, revealing Michael. He looked pretty horrible. The pretty and nice boy I used to know was all gone. His hair was all dirty, he had bruises all over his body and most of all, he had a devilish look in his eyes that I had never seen before, when we were having sex with each other.

''Looks like you made in on time, Luke. Congratulations,'' Michael said.

''Save your words you freaking jerk. What did you do to Ashton?'' I wondered angrily.

''Calm down Hemmings. For now, he simply is locked up in my basement. I told you that you had five minutes to get there until the game would begin. I said I was not going to touch him if you could reach my house in five little minutes. And I kept my promise. He is okay, for now,'' he replied.

He grabbed my wrist, making me step into his house. He closed the door behind me and locked it. I tried to get out of his grip, but it was no use. Michael was ten times stronger than me, I didn't stand a chance against him. So I simply stopped fighting and let him guide me to wherever he wanted to. He was taking me to the basement where Ashton was supposed to be. I swore to myself that he better have told me the truth when he said that he did not hurt Ashton. I would not have stand seeing Ashton, my perfect boyfriend, all in pain.

Fortunately for himself, Michael didn't lie. When we got to the bottom of the stairs, I saw Ashton seating on one of the couches. Physically, he was okay. He did not show any signs of physical pain and abuse. Mentally, he was not. He was a sobbing mess. He had his head in his hands and his sobs were the only sound filling the room. They were heart breaking. How couldn't he be emotionnaly unstable? He pratically was kidnapped by a psycho who wanted to get his revenge on me. I could not believe that I had sex with this horrible psycho and that I actually enjoyed it. I was disgusted in myself. But at that time, he was so different.

''Look who finally joined us, Ashton,'' Michael said sinisterly.

Ashton raised his head and his eyes automatically fell on me.

''L-Luke, you shouldn't have c-come,'' Ashton sadly.

''I had to, Ash. I was not going to let you here on your own. I had to come, for you,'' I replied.

''Will you two just shut up already, please?'' Michael ordered. ''Now, Luke. You are going to seat right next to Ashton and you are both going to remain quiet until we are done in here. You are going to do everything that I say, you will obey me. I'm your master and your my slaves. You two are just pieces of shit with no value. If you dare disobeying me, I won't show any mercy. Understand?''

Ashton and I nodded. I walked to the couch Ashton was sat on and took a seat next to him. I felt so guilty about this. If I had not been involved in this whole selling drugs thing, Ashton and I would not have been in danger at that moment. We would not have been stuck in Michael's basement. We would have been okay and safe, like we always were. This was all my fault. I needed to get us out of this. I put us in this, and I was also going to be the one to take us out.

We weren't allowded to talk to each other, but Michael didn't say anything about not touching each other. I held Ashton's hand in mind, trying to comfort him and telling him that it was going to be okay. It was easier said than done since even myself barely believed that things were going to be okay. For the first time in forever, I felt defeated and weak. For the first time, I was scared.

''So, the reason you guys are here today is because Mr. Luke here tried to mess with me. What were you thinking Luke? You thought it would be funny to cause me some trouble and send me to jail? It wasn't funny. I had the worst of time in there, because of you. You're so full of shit,'' Michael said.

I didn't reply. I was not allowded to and I also agreed with everything that Michael said. It was a bad move from me to give his name to the police. It sure made me a piece of shit and I could not blame him for hating me. He had all the rights to hate me and make me pay. He already did when he sent those boys to beat me up, but he needed more. But Ashton? Why did he want to hurt Ashton when he did nothing? It was his way to hurt me. He was going to hurt the thing I cared the most about in the world: my boyfriend.

''I was able to send those boys to beat you up. By what I heard, they did a pretty good job. It was supposed to ruin you. It did, only for a little while. Instead, you found happiness in the arms of the boy seating next to you. And I can't stand seeing you happy when my life has been a mess for the past two months. I don't like that. Little shits like you don't deserve to be happy,'' Michael added. ''Now, I'm going to go back upstairs and grab some little toys for our little game. Don't you dare move or talk.''

He walked up the stairs, leaving Ashton and I on our own. We were not going to have much time on our own until Michael would get back so I took the opportunity to hug him. We both really needed it. We needed comfort in this whole nightmare. We needed this hug to give us a little hope that things might be okay.

''I'm sorry,'' I whispered.

''It's not your fault,'' Ashton replied.

Michael came back a couple of minutes later holding three things. In one hand, he had a whip. In the other hand, he had a knife and a candle. He was going to torture us. He was going to make us suffer as much as he did back in jail. And he was going to use Ashton to make me suffer even more. That could not be real, that was not okay. I pinched myself hoping that I would wake up from this bad dream, but it was real. This was reality.

''So. Here's the plan. I'm going to whip you both. I'm going to whip curly hair 8 times and I'm going to whip Luke 10 times because I hate him. If you dare screaming, moving or pushing me, I'm going to punish you either with this knife or the burning wax of this candle. And don't you both dare trying to stop me. You're going to watch me whip one and other and you're going to remain silent the whole time. Or else, there will be punishment. Understand?'' Michael explained.

Ashton and I both nodded. We didn't really have the choice. I felt sick. I knew it was going to hurt like hell, but I could take it. But Ashton? Sweet innocent Ashton did not deserve any of this. He was an angel who always tried to be good. He always tried to do the right thing. He was the best person in the entire world. There was no way I was going to let him get whipped.

''So, I'm going to start with you, Luke. Take off your shirt and lay flat on your stomach. Now,'' Michael ordered.

I did as he told me. I took off my shirt and threw it to the floor. As Iayed down on my stomach, I noticed the mix of terror, panic and sadness in Ashton's eyes. He was about to watch me get hurt. But it was better me than him. I would have taken 100 hits just to protect him.

''I love you,'' I whispered. ''Please don't try to stop him. I don't want you to get hurt.''

''Well, looks like you're not following the silence rule, Luke. I'll just have to whip you 4 more times for a total of 14 hits. Do you have something to say so we can bring it up to 18?'' Michael replied.

I didn't say anything. I layed on my stomach and waited for the pain to come. And when it did, I realized those 14 hits were going to be the end of me. I can't put the pain I felt into words. It was horrible, awful. And there were 13 more to come.

2. 3. 4. 5. 6. 7. 8. 9.10.11.12.13.14.

He was done and I was calm, not giving Michael the satisfaction to see me cry. I could not feel anything anymore. I felt like the entire skin on my back was pealed off. Even though it was suffering, I did not yell or cry. Ashton did the crying for the both of us. I could not believe that he just watched me getting hurt all over again. I could not believe that I was just wipped...and that it was going to be his turn. I could not let this happen. Ashton did not have to pay for the things that I've done. That was unfair to him, that was not how things were supposed to be.

''Good boy Luke,'' Michael said sinisterly. ''Now, it's your turn, curly boy.''

Ashton, as he kept crying, took off his shirt and layed flat on his stomach. I had to stop it, but I did not have enough strenght. I barely had enough energy to simply sit up. Ashton was going to get hurt and there was no way for me to stop it. But when Michael raised his arm and was about to give the first hit, I found this special strenght inside of me. This special strenght was love. I found myself jumping on Michael, taking him to the ground. I could not control my gestures as I started to hit him in the face until he was unconscious.

''Is he...?'' Ashton asked nervously.

''N-No, he just lost consciousness,'' I replied.

Ashton ran to me and helped me stand up. I could barely stand on my feet, it hurt too much. How could this happen to me? I knew that I made mistakes, but I didn't deserve this. None of us deserved this.

''I-I'm so sorry Lukey. Oh my god. Your back is all and I-I'm sorry baby,'' Ashton said, crying.

''Better me than you, baby. C-Come on, let's get out of here before that p-psycho wakes up,'' I replied.

I had no idea where this strenght came from, but Ashton grabbed me in his arms. He rapidly went out the stairs and out the house. Still with me in his arms, we ran away from the house until it was out of sight. We reached a small park where Ashton made me sit on a bench. Everything hurt.

''I-I'm going to call 911 now okay baby? You're going to be okay. We're going to be okay, I promise,'' Ashton said.

I nodded and he quickly dialed the emergency number. He was bright enough not to mention Michael's name. He simply said that someone was hurt and needed help.

''The ambulance is on its way, Lukey. Hold on baby. I-I'm so sorry that you had to go through this. I'm so freaking sorry and it hurts so much to see you like that. I wished I could have stopped it but I-I was too scared. I'm an horrible boyfriend...'' Ashton said sadly.

''I love you, Ash. This is not your fault. And I'm glad that you let him hit me. Otherwise, he would have hurt you. I can't stand the fact that you almost got hurt. I needed to protect you baby. I'm happy that I'm the only who is hurt. Doctors will take care of me. We're free, we are going to be okay now, I promise,'' I said weakly.

I did not have much strengh in my body, but I still had enough to kiss Ashton. The kiss made us feel better. We both have been afraid that we were going to lose each other, but we did not. We made it alive. We were together and we were not seperated. The power of love helped us. As long as we were going to be togheter, nothing was to stop us. We were infinite.

Chapter Text

When I got to the hospital, I was very weak. I did not feel a thing anymore, everything felt numb. I felt like giving up, but Ashton gave me the strenght to fight. Fortunately, they let him get in the ambulance even though he was not part of my family. They even let him stay in the room where the doctors tried to heal my back the best that they could. They were all very nice and they took great care of me. But my back was ruined, disabled. I never felt such a large amount of physical of pain before. I could not stop yelling, making Ashton cry. Even though it was hard for him to stay, he did. He was not going to give up on me.

Since I was not 18 yet, they had to call my father. They told him that I was in the hospital and that I was hurt. They asked him to show up to the hospital, but he refused saying he was late and that there was no use for him to show up since I was going to survive. For the first time in my life, I wished that my dad could have been there. I felt abandonned, unwanted. I did not have any value in my father's eyes. I was certain that if the doctors had told him that I was dead, he still would not have showed up. He would have been happy to know that he did not have to care about me anymore. We used to be best friends and do everything together. I missed my old dad. I missed the relationship we used to had, I missed the time where he was proud of me. I did not grow up according to plan.

Doctors tried to get me to speak on how I got hurt, on how this could happen to me. I was not going to tell the truth. There already was enough drama involving Michael, I was not going to add any more. I was scared that he would still try to hurt us. I was afraid that, since I would soon be back to Australia, that he would attack Ashton. And I could not let that happen. So, like the good liar I was, I invented a story. I told them that I scratched my back so bad that it led to this. Of course, they did not believe me, my story was not believable but I could not think of anything better. Gladly, they dropped the subject and they did not insist any longer. They let me rest and I hoped that they would keep it that way.

I did not want to be alone so the doctors authorized Ashton to spend the night with me. I insisted a lot, so they agreed. The doctors said that I was going to be okay to get back home the next evening. I was happy and grateful that they let my boyfriend spend the night with me. I needed comfort, I needed to know that things were going to be okay. I needed the love of my life to hold me and kiss me to assure me that he was not gone. For once, I was vulnerable and I needed Ashton to make me feel better. And he did like the perfect boyfriend he was. No words can explain all the love that I had for him. He was my soulmate, my other half. He was everything that I ever wanted. His forever was all I needed to be happy and feel alive. I needed nothing else but his pure and amazing love. I was feeding on it, I was addicted to it.

I did not want to think about it before, but I realized that this was pratically our last moment spent together in a while. We were going to be seperated for three whole months. I did not want to leave him, how I wished things could be different so I could stay there with him. The thought of being away from him for three longs months, without feeling his touch, fallins asleep next to him, hugging him, kissing him and making love to him made me want to cry. A part of me was scared that this seperation would ruin everything, that Ashton would forget about me and that he would move on and find someone who deserved him more than I did. I needed his love to live. I needed his love to breathe, I could not lose him. But I had to stay strong. I had to be strong for Ashton. We were in this together, and I had to remain positive. I had to believe that we were going to be okay.

Fortunately, I was authorized to go back home the next evening, like they promised. My back still hurt pretty bad but I had many pills and some lotion to appease the pain. It could have been worst, I was happy that Ashton and I were both alive, in good health. We were okay. I called my father and asked him to pick us up, but he said no. He said that he had better things to do involving his work or whatever. A nice nurse offered us to drive us home and we accepted. This was very sweet of her. She was a total stranger to us and she still cared more about me than my own father, the man that created me. She was so nice to Ashton and I, making sure all the way home that I was okay and that I did not feel so much pain. Why couldn't my father be like her?

When Ashton and I got home, the house was empty. Of course, it was. My dad and Lorie probably went in town, like they always did. I was pissed off. But at the same time, I was happy. I was happy that Ashton and I had the house to ourselves since it was my last night in Florida. This was our last chance to be close and enjoy each other's presence before we would be seperated for three months. Like the romantic and adorable boy he was, Ashton cooked a delicious dinner for the both of us. He made some chicken along with rice and salad. It tasted so good. Ashton was the best cook in the entire galaxy and he was all mine. He had so many talents, I was so proud of him. I was so proud to call him mine.

We spent the rest of the night cuddling in bed, watching the final episodes of Supernatural. We promised ourselves to watch them all before my departure and we did. We would have to find another serie to wach once I would come back. I enjoyed those calm moments just watching TV,cuddling and kissing. It became one of my favorites activities and I was going to miss it so much. I made love to him before we went to bed. I never was going to get enough of those intimate moments. Everything about them felt perfect. How I was going to miss them. How I was going to miss everything about Ashton, the love of my life.

We woke up early the next morning because I had to be at the airport by 9AM to catch my 10:30AM flight. Ashton helped me do my luggage when we came back from the hospital so we would not have to stress about it in the morning. The atmosphere was sad and depressed. Ashton and I actually barely talked after we woke, but we never left each other's side. I did not want to let go of him. We both did not want to face the reality, but sadly, we had to. We left the house by 8:15AM because we had some road to do to reach the airport. There was only me and Ashton. My father simply left a note telling me goodbye and to have a safe flight back home.

During the whole ride, it was complete silence. We were holding hands and that was it. None of use was crying, none of us had the strenght to. Ashton's eyes we focused on the road as mine were focused on him. I wanted to stay here with him. I wanted him to take me back home and never let me go. I wanted us to be happy forever. I did not want us to be seperated. I wanted to be 18 already and take my own decisions. I wanted to do whatever I wanted to do. And what I wanted was to stay with the love of my life.I wanted to be with Ashton Fletcher Irwin, forever and always, until the very end. But life was not fair.

When we got to the airport, Ashton helped me with my luggage. We were standing in front of each other and at that very moment, we both bursted out into tears and hugged each other so tight. This was the end of what had been a perfect summer. This was the final moment of our vacations together. This was goodbye, the most hurtful goodbye that I have ever said in my entire life. Because for the first time, I actually loved and care about someone.

''I-I'm going to m-miss you so much Lukey,'' Ashton said sadly.

''I-I'm going to miss you t-too Ash, I-I don't want to leave. I-I want to stay with you,'' I replied.

''I don't want y-you to leave either. I-I wished you could stay baby, I-I love you so much,'' Ashton said.

''I-I love you even more. You're t-the best thing that ever happened to me,'' I mentionned.

And we kissed one last time. This was the very last time we were going to taste each other's lips in a long period of time, so we made it last for minutes. We were in our own little universe, it was only Ashton and me.

''You won't f-forget about m-me right?'' Ashton asked sadly.

''I-I'll never forget about y-you, Ashton. We are g-going to communicate ev-everyday okay baby? And I'll b-be back in three m-months,'' I answered, crying.

''Promise?'' He wondered.

''I promise. I love you s-so much Ashton Fletcher Irwin. I l-love you more than you can even i-imagine,'' I replied.

''I love you too, Lucas Robert Hemmings,'' Ashton said.

We hugged one more time. None of us was going to let go. None of us wanted to let the other walk away. But we had too. But we were going to be okay. Our love was stronger than anything. The distance between us was going to be huge. We were going to be exactly 13595.97 kilometers away from each other. Continents and oceans were going to seperate us. But no distance was huge enough to break the love we had for each other. Our love was stronger and more powerful than any distance and obstacles.

''I'll see you in three months. In three months, we are going to start a living together, just the two of us, forever,'' I whispered in his ear.

''I'll be here, waiting for you,'' Ashton replied.

''I love you,'' I said.

''And I adore you,'' Ashton added.

We hugged for a few more seconds before we let go. I grabbed my suitcases and made my way into the airport, not looking back. I did not want to see Ashton, standing there on his own because I knew I would have run back to him. I did not want to see him cry and I did not want to see him cry. We had to be strong for each other. Life was trying to seperate us again, but we were not going to let her win, not this time.

For a guy who first came to Florida mad and pissed off, I was leaving with my head fulled with beautiful memories and with my heart filled with powerful and pure love. For a guy who first came to see his dad and wanted to cause trouble, it turned out that I fell in love with the most incredible man ever. For a guy who thought fun was all about sex, drugs and alcohol, I realized that I had missed so many great things, that fun was not about those things. For a guy who was not going to let people change him, I did change. Everything changed, because of Ashton. And I needed those changes in my life. Because of Ashton, I did not feel empty anymore. I finally felt alive.