Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

“ Please Join Us!

Iwatobi High School invites you to attend the grand unveiling of the newly renovated pool facility!

2:00 PM Saturday, July 10th, 2022

Food and refreshments to be provided courtesy of the Iwatobi Swim Club

A mock relay will be held to commemorate the past success of the club’s founding members and to usher in the greatness that current and future team members will certainly attain. Friend's and family are welcome to attend to celebrate this momentous occasion.

Kindly respond by June 30th confirming your intention of attendance ”

Nagisa Hazuki’s soft pink eyes studied the invitation that’d been mailed to him a few weeks ago by the current team manager of the Iwatobi Swim Club, holding the shiny piece of cardstock in both hands as he leaned against the railing of his small apartment balcony. It was currently June 25th; the air was starting to turn warm in anticipation of Summer weather. The night sky was broken and shielded by an abundance of surrounding skyscrapers and massive structures, and any hint of starlight was blotted out by unyielding light pollution. He shared the cramped apartment with his long-time boyfriend, Rei Ryugazaki, who had also received an identical invitation. The two of them had relocated to the bustling, massive city of Tokyo shortly after their high school graduation, a little over four years ago. Nagisa had opted to follow Rei as he pursued his education at the prestigious Tokyo University, which he’d recently graduated from with honors. While he now worked in the IT sector for a big-time electronics company, Nagisa spent his time at home crafting and creating beautiful works of art that fed a healthy demand in smaller online stores. They lived comfortably within their means, enjoying domestic bliss in one of the most exciting cities in the world. However, being invited back to the place where their story first began was a welcome change from a rather mundane routine. Nagisa had already RSVP’d for them, and was now eager to see if any of the other founding members also had intentions of going back.

“Are you going?” Nagisa didn’t bother with tiptoeing around small-talk once a familiar voice had spoken to him on the other end of the call. He heard Makoto breathe out an endeared chuckle, his mind flooded with memories of his easy-going smile.

“I’m doing great! How about you?” Makoto spoke with a teasing voice, but it was as soft and gentle as when he normally spoke. “Yeah, I’m going. I wouldn’t miss it for the world! That poor pool needed renovating. I’m surprised our patch-job held up for as long as it did.” Makoto was a few hours away from Nagisa in a quaint area just outside of Kyoto, sitting in the living room of the apartment he shared with his college roommate Rin Matsuoka. The two of them were currently engaged in a rousing fighting game, with the Playstation controllers clutched in their hands as they mashed at plastic buttons in various patterns to unlock powerful combos. Rin was seated next to him on the couch, only somewhat listening to his roommate’s conversation as his attention stayed on the flatscreen against the opposite wall.

“Hey! I’m proud of our efforts with that damn pool!” Nagisa shot back with a cheeky grin. He pushed away from the metal railing and turned to look at the handsome countenance of his boyfriend sitting at their small kitchen table with his laptop open in front of him. The small balcony’s sliding door was open, letting in fresh summer air and allowing Rei to hear Nagisa’s conversation. “Rei and I can’t wait to see you! He’s taking a week off of work so we can spend time with our families…Neither of us have been back in over a year. We’re such bad sons!” Nagisa made a dramatic show of horror as he put the back of his delicate wrist against his forehead. Rei looked up from his work to shoot the goofy blonde a crooked grin and rolled his eyes behind clear framed glasses.

“No way, really? Maybe we should extend our stay too? We were just gonna stay the night and head back the next day. But if you guys aren’t leaving right away, I don’t want to miss the chance of getting to hang out like old times.” Makoto’s cellphone was perched atop his bent knee as Nagisa and he talked through the speaker. He made a face when Rin managed to get the upper-hand in their match and let the controller fall to the couch cushion when his character was officially K.O.ed. Rin enthusiastically celebrated his victory in silence, much to Makoto’s chagrin. “We could use the added time to find Rin a job, and maybe get a look at the rent house too. Rin,” Makoto turned to the red-head and looked at him expectantly. “You cool to stay in Iwatobi a few extra days?”

To this, Rin gave a thumbs up and rose from the couch to head into the kitchen. He wasn’t working at the moment, thanks to a generous allowance from his mother, so his schedule lent itself to being flexible. He and Makoto were set up to move to Iwatobi at the end of July, a few weeks after the unveiling ceremony, and had already put down a deposit on a modest rent house that’d suit their needs far better than the tiny two bedroom apartment they currently resided in. Makoto was chasing his dream of coaching swim lessons and becoming an occupational/physical therapist, and had landed a great job at the Rec Center and gym there in his hometown. It’s what he’d studied in college and finally that degree was going to do him some good. It wasn’t the high-powered career that his parents had hoped he’d gravitate towards, but they accepted it because this was Makoto’s passion and he would find great joy in it.

Rin, on the other hand, was in-between jobs at the moment. He’d graduated with a degree in Criminal Justice and had every intention of going into police work with the aim of eventually becoming a detective at the Tokyo office. But actually taking the first steps in pursuing that goal was proving to be overwhelming and insurmountable. The two young men were only twenty-two and twenty-three years old though, and he figured now was the time to enjoy his youth before truly committing to such an arduous and demanding career path. He was looking for a change of pace and place anyway, and figured why not tag-along with his college roommate back to his idyllic hometown. Kyoto was fun and all, but after four years it had lost its charm.

“Yeah, count us in.” Makoto paused with a short laugh when Nagisa let out an excited yell. “But I’m gonna have to find a hotel or something. Ren took my old room so Ran could have her own. There’s literally no space for the two of us to crash at my parents house.” The conversation became heavy with a quietness between the two. Makoto was relaxing against the couch cushion, his head tilted back so that he stared at the off-white ceiling above him. Nagisa cleared his throat and after a beat, broached the subject of the only other founding member they hadn’t mentioned yet.

“Have you heard from Haru-chan?” Nagisa asked in a meek voice. Makoto shut his intensely green eyes as a wave of shame washed over him. “Maybe he’d let you guys crash with him? He’s still in that house next to your parent’s, right?” It was a safe assumption, but since neither of them had spoken to Haruka Nanase in years, there was a chance that he’d moved on just as they had. Makoto let out a sigh, drawing Rin’s attention from the kitchen where he was sipping on a bottle of light beer. The topic of Haru was rarely brought up, and when it was there was always heavy baggage burdening the conversation.

“I’ll text my mom and see if Haru-chan is still in that house…don’t want to bother him if he’s not.” Ah, the coward’s choice. Rather than confront his guilt and speak to Haru directly, Makoto decided to do the run-around of verifying with his mom if the dark-haired boy was still her neighbor. There was no judgment for this course of action though, certainly not from Nagisa or Rei. They also carried their own shame for allowing their friendship with Haruka to fizzle out.

“I hope we see him at the unveiling. I miss him.” It was a kind sentiment, but one that was bitter in Nagisa’s mouth. While it’d be great to see Haru again, the uncertainty of how he felt towards his old friends gave the small blonde pause. What if Haru harbored resentment towards them? It wasn’t an unlikely scenario given how things unfolded after his and Makoto’s graduation. That had been a dark time in their lives, that was for certain. But none of them knew how or if Haruka had managed to move past it all.

Makoto scrubbed his face with his hands, uselessly willing the negative emotions to leave his mind, and nodded in agreement.

“Yeah, me too.” Makoto and Nagisa ended their conversation shortly thereafter, citing their need to settle a few things before the evening got too late. Nagisa retreated to the comfort of his boyfriend’s lap, needing consoling after a few tears came to his eyes at the upsetting thoughts brought on by mention of Haru. Rei shared the emotions, but handled them with better control so he could be the shoulder for Nagisa to cry on. Makoto busied himself with texting his mother, asking if Haruka Nanase still resided next door in the house his parents had left him to raise himself in. It only took a few minutes for her to reply in affirmation; Makoto wasn’t sure if it made him feel better or worse. She mentioned in subsequent texts that she still saw him around town from time to time, but that he mostly stayed to himself inside the drab looking residence. As if to read Makoto’s mind, she also let him know that Haru’s old phone number no longer worked. It left him with just the option of trying to reach Haru via social media. That, too, proved to be a dead-end. His facebook hadn’t been active since their high school graduation. He didn’t appear to have an instagram or twitter either. It was as if he’d fallen off the face of the Earth. Makoto could only hope that Haruka Nanase would show up at the unveiling in a few weeks.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Blue, striking eyes gazed lazily up at the glossy, postcard-sized invitation that was held between his fore and middle fingers. A small sliding window located further up the wall above him was partially open, allowing steam to drift out. The expression in his cerulean stare was unreadable, but that’d become his default these past few years. He was lounging in his bathtub, a common occurrence for the young man who had a serious affinity for water, soaking in warm water that nearly ran over the tub’s edge. Thankfully, the small room designated solely for bathing had a tiled floor that drained at the center; eliminating the risk of water seeping past the door. It wasn’t a particularly fancy or spacious area, what with the tub only big enough to fit Haru’s body and a detachable shower head hanging off the wall at. The floor tiling extended halfway up the walls as well, made up of small squares varying in shades of blue and gray.

Haruka Nanase rarely visibly expressed the emotions roiling just below the surface, of which there were many in spite of people’s assumption that he no longer experienced strong feelings at all. His head rested against the waterproof bathtub pillow behind him, and his bent knees barely poked above the water’s still surface. For those who knew Haru best, the serious contemplative look on his beautiful face was clear to see. Sadly, there was only one person these days that could discern between the micro-expressions that flitted across his visage. The cellphone resting on the tub’s edge vibrated twice to signal a new text message. With slow, precise motions, Haru set the paper invitation on the edge of the tub, then picked up his phone to read the new text message.

From: Sousuke Yamazaki
Message: You good? Got a funny look on your face.

Haru’s nimble thumb tapped against the phone’s flat surface, typing out a quick reply that was swiftly followed by a picture of the invitation. It didn’t take but a minute before another text came in.

From: Sousuke Yamazaki
Message: You should go. Wouldn’t hurt to have some normal social interaction once in a while.

A quiet breath drifted out of Haru’s parted lips as he considered Sousuke’s advice. Like in most things, he was right. Haru couldn’t help but wonder if his old swim club friends had received and RSVP’d to the invitation. The thought of seeing Nagisa, Rei, and Makoto after such a long separation was daunting, but there was an exhilarating desire to swim with them again that finally convinced Haru it would be worth dealing with the hassle. He sent a confirmation email to the address provided on the back of the invitation, sealing his fate. Sousuke would iron out the details with his schedule, make all the necessary arrangements.

Just as Haru released a deep sigh, causing his body to further relax and go limp, his foot lost its grip on the bottom of the tub and jumped forward slightly. It agitated the water a bit, but also caused a sharp pain to run up Haru’s body. He gritted his teeth to bite back the pained moan that wanted to escape, willing the discomfort to ebb back into a dull ache with each slow heartbeat. The camera mounted in one of the top corners of the small bathroom remained ever-focused on Haru’s movements. As did the other camera hanging off the wall behind his head. He wondered how many out there were watching him at that very moment. The delicate fabric of Haru’s black lace half-mask tickled his high cheekbone, but he resisted fussing with it in lieu of staying perfectly still and allowing the warm water to ease his aching body into a state of lessened soreness.

Chapter Text

It was late that afternoon when the antics of three young boys goofing off at the local playground had to finally come to an end. Haruka Nanase, Makoto Tachibana, and Nagisa Hazuki had been enjoying themselves running about the quaint jungle gym, slide, and swing set for the better part of two hours. It was a rather endearing scene, only made more so by the fact that they were just so damn adorable and precocious. They were still scrawny with youth, and watching them clamber up ladders and crawling through plastic tunnels made the two mothers seated nearby smile with adoration. Nagisa and Makoto’s mother were sitting together at a bench on the periphery of the small play area, making idle chit-chat while the boys hooted and hollered as they chased each other in a game of tag. They were only five and six year olds, and had all the energy that age range entailed. It was boundless and exhausting just to watch.

“Come, Nagisa-kun. We’ve got to head home now.” The blonde woman called out to her diminutive and hyper-active child, who was currently at the bottom of a dog-pile with Haru and Makoto on top. Nagisa announced his reluctance with a loud groan, but still heeded his mother’s call. Makoto and Haruka remained a jumbled mass of boyish limbs as they bid their younger friend goodbye, watching Nagisa walking away hand-in-hand with his mom towards a nearby parked car. He lived a little further away from the playground than Haruka and Makoto, who had walked there with mother Tachibana escorting them.

“Boys, let’s go!” Kayako Tachibana yelled sweetly, making a gesture for her son and his best friend to head her way. The two youngsters untangled themselves and raced over, their sandal-clad feet scraping against the concrete. Since they were in the throes of summer heat, the boys were dressed for the warmer weather. Haru wore a red tank top and blue shorts, and was well on the way to developing a sunburn on his delicate shoulders. Makoto was dressed in a pair of short denim overalls with a yellow t-shirt underneath.

The three of them walked back home from the park, their shadows cast long across the pavement as the Sun set over the ocean horizon. Due to his parents demanding work schedules (his mother was a nurse and his father worked night shifts at the local manufacturing plant) Haruka was often left in the care of Makoto’s family, so he’d quickly become an unofficial member of the Tachibana clan. As the trio approached the familiar street where their neighboring houses were located, Makoto and Haruka jabbered on and on about some video game or trading cards that his mother knew nothing about. When it came time to part ways, there was a cheeky smile stretching across Haru’s face as he waved goodbye to his best friend before dashing up the flight of concrete steps that lead to the front of his parent’s house.

“Oto-san! Oka-san! I’m home!” His small voice permeated an otherwise quiet house. Haruka took a moment to toe off his sandals in the foyer of the traditional-styled Japanese dwelling. He didn’t notice the unfamiliar pair of lace-up canvas shoes already among the usual assortment kept by the door.

“We’re at the table,” His mother’s pretty voice spoke up from further in the house, beckoning Haru to join them. The scent of freshly cooked food wafted through the house’s warm air, triggering Haru’s hunger response almost instantly. His small bare feet padded across dark hardwood flooring, the short hall illuminated by the ceiling’s track lighting. The small six-year-old rounded a short wall and the living room came into view, where his parents and a mystery guest sat around the rectangular chabudai at the center. The box TV in the corner was turned onto a baseball game, but the volume was too low to make out what the announcers were saying. Plates of humble, but delicious, home-cooked food sat atop the short table, and there were open beer bottles between Haru’s father and the unknown gentleman.

Haru’s mother, Shima Nanase, was a beautiful woman who had passed her striking looks down to her son. She had dark, inky hair that reached past her shoulders and bright blue eyes that reflected deep affection as they landed on Haru’s cherubic face. His father, Hayato Nanase, was tall and well built thanks to his laborious work at the manufacturing plant. His dark hair was kept short, but fell around his face in dramatic sections. Haru ran into the room to launch himself into his father’s lap, his feet skidding across the worn tatami mats with each quick step. The stranger that joined them at the table had similar traits to Hayato, but he looked a good ten years younger. His dark hair fell in layers around his jawline, the tips bleach blonde and fashionably styled back with gel. He was dressed much more casually than the other two adults, and had an air of coolness about him. Hayato grinned proudly as he guided Haru to face the other man.

“Haru, this is my younger brother; your Oji-san. Jiro, this is Haruka. Ain’t he the cutest?” Hayato hugged his small son to his chest, making Shima smile endearingly as Haru groaned in feigned embarrassment. A grin curled on Jiro’s youthful face upon taking all of Haru’s appearance in. While Hayato was approaching thirty-five years old, the younger brother had only just turned twenty-three. Shima was in between at age twenty-seven.

“Of course he’s cute~ He looks just like Shima!” Jiro’s voice spoke with sincerity and a hint of teasing aimed at Shima, who simply responded with an odd smile. “Come give your Oji-san a hug! I’m so glad to finally get to meet you, Haru-chan.” Tan arms opened up to invite the child into an embrace. Hayato released his son and Haru eagerly toppled into his uncle’s lap, wrapping his skinny arms around the man’s neck.

“Oji-Jiro! How come I never met you before?” Being six meant that Haru’s tactless questions weren’t met with offense or irritation. He smiled when Hayato and Jiro let out good-natured laughs at Haru’s sweet moniker for his uncle. Across the table, Shima pulled a reluctant expression aimed at her husband, but Hayato dismissed her concern with a small motion of his hand.

“Jiro has been away for a few years, that’s all. He’s back in town and you’ll get to see him alot more now.” Hayato explained vaguely. In truth, Jiro had just been released from a five-year prison sentence for grand larceny and racketeering. But that punishment had only been for the crimes that were proven in court; his debauched resume was actually quite extensive. Shima didn’t like having an ex-convict in her home; it didn’t matter that he was her husband’s beloved baby brother. But she’d lost the argument of denying him access when he showed up on their doorstep out of the blue, asking to crash while he looked for ‘honest work’. Hayato was blind and sentimental when it came to his little brother, and would do anything to help the troubled man get his life in order.

“I’m looking forward to getting to know you better, Haru-chan.” Jiro spoke affectionately as Haru turned to sit in his uncle’s lap, back pressed into the man’s stomach. There was already a sense of familiarity between them, thanks to Haru’s trusting ways. As the little boy reached across the table to take a sample of his mother’s pan-fried mackerel, he smiled and nodded enthusiastically.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Two boys sat pressed together in front of a mid-sized TV in the Tachibana’s living room, both leaning in close as they took turns playing a popular JRPG game. The year was 2006, Makoto and Haruka were both seven-years-old and still thick as thieves. It was a weekday afternoon, both of Haru’s parents were still at work, and he was being supervised by Kayako Tachibana as per usual. She truly was a second mother to him.

“My Oji-Jiro is s’posed to be coming back to visit for a while. Oto-san said he’ll stay for a few days and he’s gonna take me to the amusement park this weekend.” Haru informed his friend casually, their wide eyes glued to the bright TV screen. “You wanna come?” Makoto’s gaze shifted to glance at Haru, but it lasted just a moment. The sensitive boy kept his apprehension about Haru’s uncle to himself, having no concrete reason to dislike the man other than a nagging feeling in the back of his head. There was just something about him that set Makoto on edge, but Haru seemed enamored with him.

“N-No thank you…but I hope you guys have fun.” Makoto tried to put a bit of enthusiasm in his voice, wanting to encourage his friend’s happiness. From outside the house, the sound of a car door slamming shut caught the boy’s attention. Anticipating his uncle’s arrival via taxi, Haru jumped up and ran to the house’s front window to look out at the street just beyond the Tachibana’s small garden. Lapis colored eyes widened and a smile broke out across his adorable face.

“Oji-Jiro! You’re here!” Haru ignored Mama Tachibana’s voice telling him not to just run outside and bolted out the front door. Almost tripping down the short flight of stairs that lead to sidewalk and street access, Haru’s eyes remained fixed on his uncle’s familiar figure. He was dressed in baggy jeans and a black sweater that fit his tight frame nicely. Upon seeing his hyper nephew rushing towards him, Jiro dropped his duffle bag and prepared to catch the boy when he launched himself forward. A year hadn’t done much to make Haru heavier, he was still so small and lanky, and Jiro’s hands came to support the boy by grasping his rear-end. Haru hugged his uncle close and the two shared a friendly laugh as they reunited. Through the same window Haru had looked out, Makoto watched from inside his house as Jiro’s hands remained plastered to Haru’s backside as he held the boy up in a firm embrace. A concerned frown tugged on his boyish face.

It was well past midnight when something pulled Haruka from the deep embrace of sleep. There was an unexpected coldness that surrounded him, rather than the usual warmth provided by a heavy blanket. Dark brows knitted together as he moaned groggily, shifting against the mattress in search of the comforter. But there was something beside him that caused the mattress to dip, and Haru’s knee brushed against whatever it was. The sensation caused him to finally open his sleepy eyes to a darkened bedroom that was faintly illuminated by a small plug-in dolphin night-light.

“Oji-Jiro?” Haru mumbled softly, bringing a small hand up to rub his eye. The man was seated beside him, remaining oddly quiet. The digital alarm clock on Haru’s bedside table flickered ‘12:07 AM’; it certainly wasn’t time for him to wake up for school yet. “What’s going on?” When Haru sat up on his elbow to better face the grown man, he noticed that his thin pajama top had been pushed up to expose his pale midsection. In the same moment, it dawned on him that his boxer shorts had also been removed; leaving his entire lower half completely exposed. Still not fully awake, Haru didn’t understand the cause for alarm.

“I came to check on you before I go to sleep. You wet the bed, Haru-chan.” A lie, but Haru didn’t have a reason to doubt his uncle’s intentions; despite the fact that he hadn’t wet the bed in over three years. There was an uncomfortable wetness on Haru’s prepubescent genitalia, so that must mean he’d indeed had an accident. “I went ahead and removed your underwear, so everything is ok. Go back to sleep.” With a gentle push against Haru’s slim shoulders, Jiro guided the boy to lay back down. He pulled the blanket back over Haru’s small form, and placed a kiss on his forehead that lingered a bit longer than Haru was accustomed to. Sleep reclaimed the boy in no-time though, and he woke up some hours later to find his uncle acting as if nothing was out of the ordinary. During Haru and Makoto’s walk to school that morning, the dark-haired boy considered sharing what’d happened to him the previous night. But the prospect of being teased for wetting the bed kept him silent.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Haru sat on the bottom step of the stairs that lead to the second floor, curled in on himself with a dejected expression on his face. Cerulean eyes remained fixed on his bare toes as he anxiously curled and uncurled them against the smooth hardwood floor. In the kitchen, Hayato and Shima Nanase bickered loudly with raised voices.

“He can’t stay here. That’s final!” Shima insisted with a stern tone.

“I can’t just let him become homeless! Look, it’d only be for a few weeks. ‘Til he gets back on his feet.” Hayato tried to reason with his stubborn wife, but there was an edge seeping into his normally placating voice that Haru didn’t quite recognize.

“He’s caught up in something that I don’t want anywhere near Haruka. Your brother makes me uncomfortable, Hayato! You managed to make something of yourself without resorting to crime - why can’t he?!” Her voice became even louder, more confrontational. Haru hugged himself and bent forward to place his forehead against his knees.

“That’s enough!” Hayato’s booming voice and a harsh banging sound made Haru jump. His father had never sounded so enraged and it scared the recently turned eight-year-old. “He’s family and I’m not turning my back on him. End of discussion.” and that seemed to truly be the final word on the matter. Haru wasn’t sure what to make of his parent’s hostile argument, or if he was dreading or anticipating Jiro’s arrival.

It was an awkward affair when Jiro showed up a few hours later, ladened with heavy duffle bags that contained all his worldly possessions. The normally cool and easy-going man had an air of bitterness and frustration about him. Shima took to avoiding the man as much as possible, speaking to him with a clipped tone as the family shared an uncomfortable meal together at the chabudai. Haru was excused from the table earlier than what was typical, instructed to stay in his room for the remainder of the night. It felt as if he was being punished for something, but the boy didn’t fully understand the situation playing out around him.

Late that evening as he sat at his small desk hunched over some troublesome homework, Haru heard a gentle rasping on his closed bedroom door. A small radio was playing pop music quietly in the background, keeping the room from being totally silent except for occasional pencil scratches. Assuming it was his mother coming to check on him, Haru didn’t look up from the math problem when he spoke out loud for them to enter. There was the sound of sock-clad feet shuffling into the room before the door was quietly shut again, and finally a distinct voice that didn’t belong to Shima grabbed Haru’s attention.

“Haru-chan, how’s your homework coming along?” Jiro asked sweetly as he stepped further into the room towards his nephew. Haru could see that he was holding a large, stiff paper bag behind his legs and wondered what could be in it.

“Okay…I suck at math though.” He answered dutifully, swiveling his small desk chair so as to face Jiro. The room was filled with toys and belongings appropriate for an eight-year-old, and the only thing that felt out of place was the adult standing at the center. “What’s in the bag, Oji-Jiro?” Haru asked curiously, bright blue eyes straining to see through the brown paper material.

Jiro laughed softly and moved across the small room to take a seat on Haru’s tiny bed, placing the bag on the floor between his feet. He had a strange gleam in his dark brown eyes and a cocky grin twisting one side of his face.

“I realized that I missed your eighth birthday this year and wanted to make up for it. Come see what I got you~” He beckoned the child to approach, leaning back on his palms that were pressed against the mattress behind him. Forgetting any sense of foreboding or trepidation, Haru jumped up from the chair and fell to his knobby knees at Jiro’s feet. Little hands pulled open the paper bag to reveal the object of Haru’s greatest desires; a beautiful Playstation 3 gaming console, which was suspiciously unboxed and had loose electronic cords and controllers stuffed at the bottom. His stunning eyes lifted away from the bag’s contents to look up at Jiro’s grinning face, mouth agape with a big smile that was missing one of his front teeth. Before the boy could voice his exuberant joy, Jiro placed a finger to his lips in a signal to stay quiet.

“Your Oka-san said I couldn’t get it for you…so this has to be our little secret. Okay?” Nevermind the fact that Haru wouldn’t be able to use the console without his parents discovering, just the simple fact that he now owned it made the boy’s heart explode with delight. He, Makoto, and Nagisa had all wanted one for Christmas, but none had been fortunate enough to get it. Unable to contain his gratitude, Haru jumped up to wrap his arms around Jiro’s neck in a tight hug. His baby face pressed into the man’s strong chest.

“Thank you Oji-Jiro! I love it!” He whispered excitedly, nearly vibrating with anticipation of sharing it with his friends. Jiro let out a humming laugh as he stroked his nephew’s back in slow, downward motions.

“Does it make you feel good, Haru-chan?” He asked in an innocent tone. Haru pulled away from the hug and returned to kneeling at Jiro’s feet, rummaging through the bag to further examine the gaming console and its paraphernalia.

“So good! It's the best gift I ever got!” Haru confirmed in a cheerful voice. There was suddenly a light touch against the bottom of his chin, pulling the boy’s attention back to his uncle’s face. Jiro’s finger traced along the side of Haru’s precious face, trailing lightly against the pale skin before tucking a piece of dark hair behind his ear.

“Do you want to make me feel good too? There’s something you could do right now that would make your Oji-Jiro so happy. To show how much you appreciate your birthday gift~” Jiro’s deep voice took on a saccharinely sweet quality, but his eyes reflected something dark and devious that little Haru didn’t recognize. Wanting to please his uncle, Haru sat up on his knees and nodded eagerly. “Good boy…my sweet boy.” Mere inches from his face, Haru watched Jiro’s hands move to open the buckle of his belt before unfastening the buttons at the waistband of his jeans. Blinking his large, round eyes, Haru waited patiently for Jiro to explain what exactly he could do to show his appreciation. “Don’t forget Haru…this is our secret.” The disturbed man then reached into his pants with a sick expression playing across his face.

Fifteen minutes later, Jiro slinked out of Haru’s bedroom with all the stealth befitting the sick criminal he was. He evaded his brother and sister-in-law’s radar and made his way back to the living room, where a futon had been laid out for his use while staying with them. Haru was back at his desk, hunched over again, but no longer focused on completing his math homework. Hot tears streaked down his puffy face, the salty liquid trickling into his mouth to mix with the musky taste that still lingered on his tongue. His disheveled hair and bruised lips would have made it apparent what had transpired, but he was left alone for the rest of the night.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“You ready to go over to Makoto’s? Do you have everything you need?” Shima Nanase asked her ten-year-old son as she put the finishing touches to her jewelry. She and Hayato were going out for the evening on a much-overdue date, so Haru was set to spend the night at his best friend and neighbor’s house. She was sitting at the small vanity mirror in the corner of her and Hayato’s bedroom, which shared a wall with Haruka’s room. The boy in question was laid out on his parents bed, watching his mother with an indifferent expression. Downstairs he could hear his father speaking on the phone with someone.

“Yeah,” He answered bluntly, not needing to elaborate further. Shima nodded absentmindedly as she gave a final inspection in the mirror, then gracefully stood up from her kneeling position on the floor. Clad in a pretty black dress and decorated with tasteful jewelry and minimal makeup, Shima’s natural beauty radiated in a way that made Haru smile to himself. He could tell his mom was in a really good mood, that she was positively giddy to spend some quality time with her husband. While their marriage wasn’t perfect by any stretch of the imagination, it was clear that there was love between Shima and Hayato. They were somewhat absent parents who didn’t remember to attend every school production, but there was no doubt that they loved their son.

A figure stepped into the doorframe suddenly, startling Haru into letting out a frightened yelp before he realized it was just his father standing there. It was so out of character for their son that Hayato and Shima couldn’t help but chuckle.

“Change of plan; you don’t have to go to Makoto’s tonight.” Haru’s expression shifted to one of disappointment upon hearing that; as did Shima’s. She was about to ask if he was canceling their date when Hayato continued to further elaborate. “Oji-Jiro is going to watch you tonight. His cab is around the corner and I ordered a pizza for the two of you. Isn’t that awesome? Haru-chan?” The lack of reaction from his son caused Hayato to second guess himself, and Shima didn’t look too pleased either.

“I don’t understand,” Shima started slowly, knowing full well how much Haru enjoyed being at the Tachibana household. She also wasn’t too keen on leaving her ten-year-old son alone with Jiro. He hadn’t come around in almost a year, having found ‘gainful employment’ in Tokyo that kept him busy these days. Hayato sighed and rubbed the back of his neck, looking at his wife and child with apologetic eyes.

“Goro told me a few days ago that Kayako is having a hard time handling the twins, and they’re trying to limit exposure to other people til they’re a little bigger. I asked Jiro to fly down for the weekend and he seemed pretty happy to come visit.” It was a reasonable excuse, but Haru still glowered from his spot on the bed. He’d been so excited to go over to Makoto’s and play on the Playstation with him. Hayato hated seeing his son so disappointed and downcast, so he quickly came up with a plan to make it up to him. “How about this? I’ll text Makoto’s dad and ask if your friend can come over first thing in the morning. You two can play all day together. I’ll even take you to the beach if you want. Deal?”

It was too fine a compromise for Haru to pass up. His parents didn’t know the true depths of Haru’s reticence about being alone with his uncle, and there was no way he would divulge all the things the man had done to him; the confusion and shame was too great to acknowledge. Giving a lopsided grin, Haru accepted his father’s terms with a handshake. But as soon as their palms met, Hayato gave a hard pull and yanked Haru into an impromptu wrestling match on the bed. Pinning his boy in an immobilized position, Hayato began relentlessly tickling Haru’s sides to elicit screeching laughter from him. Shima covered her laughing smile at the beautiful sight of her husband and son bonding so sweetly, counting her blessings for having them in her life.

Just then, a digital sounding chime sounded off throughout the house; someone was at the front door. Haru’s heart skipped a beat and he felt his stomach plummet because he knew who it was. Hayato didn’t notice his son’s sudden frozen reaction and got up to let his brother into the house. Shima gave an affectionate pet to Haru’s black hair and ushered him out of the master bedroom. The two descended the stairs together, but upon spotting Jiro standing in the foyer with his dad, Haru sat down on a step at the middle of the flight.

Jiro had changed since his previous visit. He no longer dressed in shabby clothes or begged for handouts from Hayato. He held himself with better, prouder posture and wore tailored clothes that seemed out of place for babysitting his nephew in the sleepy town of Iwatobi. Whipping his dark sunglasses off, Jiro smiled and conversed with Haru’s parents in the foyer for a few minutes before cutting his eyes up at the boy. A designer travel bag hung off one shoulder, which Shima graciously took into the living room. There was a strange expression on her face that Haru caught as she passed through the hallway, but he couldn’t read it well enough to understand what was upsetting her.

“You two better head out soon or you’ll miss your reservation. Haru-chan and I will have a fun night in. Right?” Jiro asked as he stared up at the young boy still seated half-way up the flight of wooden stairs. There was something predatory in his eyes that unsettled Haru, but the promise of playing with Makoto all day tomorrow kept him from voicing his dissent. After some parting hugs and kisses from his parents, Haru was finally left at the complete mercy of his uncle. The energy between them was charged with anxiety and tension. He had no idea what tricks or plans Jiro had come equipped with, but Haru was determined to not let the man get the upper-hand.

An hour later, uncle and nephew sat in the living room with a pizza box open atop the low dining table. Most of it had been eaten, leaving just a few remaining sliced in the grease-stained cardboard box. The TV was turned to some action movie to keep Haru’s attention, one he was actually a huge fan of, but for some reason he was having an extremely difficult time keeping his eyes open. Haru took a sip of his funny tasting soda in an attempt to stay awake, but a few minutes later he caught his head lolling forward against his control. Jiro sat on the other side of the chabudai, looking so calm and unbothered by Haru’s drooping shoulders and swaying movements. The clatter of a plastic cup falling onto the floor caught Jiro’s attention then, and he watched as Haru slumped lifelessly to his side on the tatami mat below.

Without hesitation, he moved around the table and scooped the limp boy into his arms. Haru moaned in his groggy state, a frightened expression crossing his pale face as he pushed ineffectually against Jiro’s chest. There were enough drugs in his system to keep him pliable and weak, though not unconscious. Carrying Haru bridal style up the stairs, Jiro smiled maliciously as he appraised his nephew’s nubile form in his strong arms. Haru was utterly defenseless to Jiro’s evil machinations, and could do nothing to protect himself from the horrific acts that were about to be committed. Jiro kicked Haru’s bedroom door shut behind him with a loud slam, and stalked over to his childish bed with absolute resolve in his plans for the evening.

Hayato and Shima returned home later that evening, far later than they had intended, but were clearly still riding a flirtatious high as they stumbled into the foyer of their darkened, quiet home. Hushed laughter permeated the silence, but it quickly ended when Hayato turned the living room light on to reveal Jiro was not asleep on the guest futon that’d been pulled out earlier. The pizza box and spilled drink had been cleaned up, leaving no evidence that anything was amiss, but Shima still frowned. Her buzz was starting to fade.

“He couldn’t stay til we got back? Did he even text you?” She huffed angrily in a lowered voice, ascending the stairs to go check on their son. Hayato heaved a long sigh as he shook his head in disbelief of his brother’s apparent irresponsibility. This was certainly the last time he’d get to babysit Haru; he just couldn’t be trusted. Standing outside Haruka’s closed bedroom door, Shima carefully pushed it open to peek inside the dim space. She saw her son’s still form tucked away in bed, sleeping peacefully. Letting out a breath of relief, Shima smiled to herself and moved further down the narrow hallway to enter the master bedroom. Hayato followed shortly after, and the two went to bed none the wiser of what’d happened to their son.

The next morning, instead of waking their son up bright and early, Shima and Hayato allowed him to stay in bed and get a bit more sleep. It was almost ten o’clock when Makoto Tachibana showed up at their doorstep with a big, eager smile on his precious face. He’d been just as excited as Haru by the idea of getting to play all day together. After greeting Shima with a respectful bow, Makoto bolted upstairs with loud footfalls against the wooden steps. He had so many plans for their day of fun and couldn’t wait a moment longer to wake up his best friend.

“Wake up, Haru-chan!” Makoto shouted with a bright, energetic voice as he bound into Haru’s quiet bedroom. The raven-haired boy didn’t even flinch at the sudden noise. His back was facing the door, and the heavy blanket was still pulled up to his chin. Makoto smiled to himself and moved to kneel against the edge of the mattress, just behind Haruka’s head, and gave a careful jostle to his shoulder beneath the covers. “Haru-chan! Let’s play Playstation! Come on, wake up already!” When there was still no response to Makoto’s yelling, confusion replaced elation. “Haru-chan?” It was then that a strange smell permeated Makoto’s awareness. It was coming from under the blanket, so he carefully pushed the fabric away from Haru’s body to reveal the truth.

There was a huge wet stain beneath Haruka’s lower-half, and it smelled strongly of urine. Makoto felt his stomach flip and his mouth go dry in an instant, but it wasn’t because Haru had peed himself. His pajama bottoms were missing and there were blood stains on the sheets and his thighs. Haru’s body began trembling and a small, pained noise slipped out his parted lips. Snapping back to reality, Makoto sucked in a sharp breath and cried out for Haru’s mom in a horrified voice that would send terror through any parent. He kept screaming until Shima and Hayato appeared in the doorway, their eyes automatically settling on Haru’s defiled body. Realization hit them in an instant and Shima broke down in tears as she rushed to gather Haru into her arms. He remained unresponsive, practically catatonic, as she cried over him and lavished his abused body with kisses and tight hugs. Hayato managed to gather himself enough to call for an ambulance, then joined his wife in cradling their son in a protective, yet remorseful, cocoon.

The events that unfolded afterwards were as infuriating as they were disheartening. Doctors confirmed that Haru had been drugged and violently assaulted, but the perpetrator was still at large. Jiro seemed to disappear off the face of the Earth, becoming untraceable in every sense of the word. To make matters worse, the police in Tokyo were only too happy to sit on their hands when it came time to search for the depraved man. No matter what Shima and Hayato did to raise awareness about the injustice being done to their son, nothing worked to spur police or news stations into action. Lost for what to do and running out of options, they eventually became resigned to the fact that Jiro wouldn’t face punishment for this terrible crime; it left a horrible taste in their mouths and broke their hearts even more.

A week later, Haru was released from the hospital and brought home to recover in the place that only served as a reminder of what had happened to him. Haru still hadn’t spoken yet, and he was only marginally more responsive to external stimuli that tried to pull a reaction from the broken boy. It wasn’t until Makoto was at his side again, speaking to Haruka in a soft voice only he had, that something finally sparked in his otherwise listless eyes.

“I’ll stay with you Haru-chan. Forever and ever. I promise, I won’t leave you alone anymore.” Makoto whispered to his impassive friend, watching for any kind of emotion to cross Haru’s blank face. He locked their tiny pinky fingers together, solidifying his earnest promise to Haru, and finally there was a response. Haru’s stiff finger curled around Makoto’s, and from then on the two remained inseparable.

Chapter Text

It was 2018, the end of March, and a time in Haruka Nanase’s life that should have been consumed with excitement over life’s natural progression for someone his age. He and Makoto Tachibana were supposed to be moving away to Kyoto the following week, ready to start their first semester at University. It was something they’d been planning and striving for since their Junior year of high school, and a week ago everything had still been poised for them to make that transition to the next phase of their lives together. Haru had been awarded a full-ride swimming scholarship, which would help project him further towards the end goal of representing Japan at the Olympic games one day. Makoto had also received a partial swimming scholarship, and he already knew that he was destined to pursue a career in physical/occupational therapy. It fit perfectly with his nurturing and helpful personality. Everything had fallen into place. All the fruits of their hard labors were finally within reach. Haru was someone who’d overcome horrific trauma and built an existence to be proud of, with friends who loved him and taught him how good things could be. Funny how life finds a way to derail those plans at the worst possible time; not that there was ever a good time to learn one’s parents had died.

Hayato and Shima Nanase had both perished in a freak apartment fire, along with a few other unfortunate souls who happened to live in that building. In a cruel twist of the knife, not enough of their bodies remained to have a proper cremation. Haru had received the news of his parents untimely ends from a Tokyo police officer through a formal and emotionally detached phone call, but the reality of the situation hadn’t really sunk in until he was asked if he wanted to go through the apartment’s charred remains in case something sentimental had survived the flames. Haru had never even stepped foot in his parent’s Tokyo apartment. The last time they’d been together was over a year ago when Hayato and Shima had come back to Iwatobi to mark the occasion of Haruka’s seventeenth birthday with an awkward family dinner. They could only bring themselves to stay a single night before high-tailing it back to Tokyo, where they could resume a life wholly separated from their only son. It’d been like that since he was thirteen years old, conditioning Haruka to suffer the loneliness of a life without parents; almost like cruel preparation for an eventuality such as this.

The Nanase household was filled with a floral scent that mixed with burning candle wax; an otherwise pleasant smell if it hadn’t been associated with death. Faceless, nameless people filtered in and out all day to pay respects to Hayato and Shima Nanase, as well as offer condolences to their son. Beautiful flower arrangements overwhelmed the open living space at the small house’s center, where black-framed portraits of the deceased sat side-by-side against the wall. Haruka remained dutifully kneeling before the altar dressed in his best black suit, his face and behavior impassive and unsettling for those who didn’t know him well. He tried to ignore the whispers that commented on his lack of emotions, and of the mystery behind his parent’s life away from their son. The only ones who knew Haru’s truth were the Tachibana family, and Nagisa and Rei; they were the only ones who Haru wanted to know his truth.

“Haru-chan,” A soft voice permeated the heavy fog in Haru’s mind, pulling his bright lapis gaze from the empty space in front of him. Three familiar faces looked back from their place in the empty foyer, each holding a different expression that tried to express unspoken sentiments. It was late, the wake was officially over, the brave act Haru had been putting on could finally end. A stiff breath escaped his mouth, like he’d been holding it all day, and finally something akin to bitterness flitted across Haru’s lovely face.

“You did so good.” Nagisa said sweetly as he shuffled into the open living space to kneel beside his friend. “It’s over.” He reassured Haru with a sad smile and a tender touch to his shoulder. Rei and Makoto quickly followed suit and came to join the two kneeling on the tatami mats, flanking Haruka on his other side. Meeting each of his friend’s gazes seemed to release something inside him, and soon there were quiet tears slipping down Haru’s pale cheeks as an emotional dam sprung a leak. His bottom lip trembled from the pain collecting in the back of his throat.

“It’s really over?” Haru’s voice sounded so small, hoarse from the strain of holding everything inside, and he caught Makoto’s warm gaze. His dearest friend slid his palm over Haru’s suit-covered shoulder and gave a strong, unwavering squeeze.

“Yeah.” There wasn’t much more to say than that. None of the other teenage boys knew the correct things to say that would make things easier for their friend. They did what they knew would do Haru the most good; staying ever vigilant at his side. Having them there, offering support with just their presence, was enough. Upon hearing Makoto’s confirmation that the hardest part of the process was over, Haru’s careful mask finally fell away as he broke down in a trembling heap against the taller boy. Tears fell freely from tightly shut eyes and he clung to Makoto’s nice suit jacket like it was a life preserver at the center of a vast ocean. Without hesitation, Nagisa, Rei, and Makoto came together in a group hug that enveloped Haru with their unabashed love for him.

After recovering from the emotional rollercoaster of the day, Haru announced that he wanted to go soak in the tub for a while. This surprised no one and the three others simply nodded their understanding before he disappeared in the bathing room across the hall. When they heard the familiar sound of water gushing to fill the tub, Nagisa, Rei, and Makoto regrouped to discuss the next steps necessary to best support Haruka going forward. They stood outside the domicile’s front door, surrounded by a darkened sky and the sounds of cicadas, hands in their pockets and serious expressions on their handsome faces.

“I leave for University in four days, but I plan on staying here with him until the very end.” Makoto said with a look of great remorse. Of course Haru wasn’t well enough to just jump into university life. He needed time to cope with the new reality of dealing with his parent’s deaths, and all the responsibilities and consequences that entailed. He no longer had the safety net that parents naturally formed as their children grew into early adulthood. But when Makoto posed the idea of also postponing going to college in order to stay by Haru’s side, the raven-haired boy had insisted that he continue on without him. Makoto was someone untouched by real tragedy; a shining beacon of optimism in Haru’s otherwise bleak life. Knowing how much Makoto was looking forward to starting college, and how hard his parents had worked to help save up for the moving and early-on expenses, Haru refused to let his best friend risk his future happiness just for his sake. With the promise that Haru would join him at college the following year, Makoto reluctantly agreed to move forward with their initial plan; sans Haru.

“Don’t work Makoto! Rei and I will be here to keep Haru-chan company and make sure he’s alright.” Nagisa chimed in with such conviction that it brought a smile to Makoto’s face.

“We’ll make sure Haruka-senpai keeps swimming with us, even if it has to be at the rec center or in the ocean. We won’t let him be alone.” Rei made a fist in front of his chest as if to emphasize the sincerity of his promise, staring at Makoto with a determined look reflecting in his purple eyes behind red spectacle frames.

“Thank you Nagisa, Rei,” Makoto’s voice caught in the back of his throat as emotions swelled in him. Swallowing hard to correct the issue, he looked back at the house behind them where Haru was inside. “Since I can’t be here, I’m glad he’ll still have you two.” Truthfully, he was somewhat jealous that they would be available to help Haru during such a difficult time, but he quickly pushed the petty emotion down and made a step towards the front door. “I’m gonna go back in, but please come visit us before I leave.”

“Just try and keep us away.” Rei said in an almost playful tone, hoping to lighten the mood. The three young men said their parting goodbyes and Makoto watched Nagisa and Rei descend the concrete steps just beyond the edge of Haruka’s property. Needing to be close to him again, Makoto re-entered the house and crossed the small interior in a few long strides until he was standing at the closed bathroom door. It was silent on the other side, even when he called out to check on Haru.

“You hungry? There’s no mackerel but people brought you plenty of food so I’m sure there’s something you might like.” Still no answer. Makoto screwed his lips in a pensive expression, then pressed his ear to the sliding door’s flat surface. A nagging worry began tugging at the back of Makoto’s brain, but he fought the growing instinct to invade Haru’s privacy and push into the small room to make sure he was alright. “Please answer me, Haru-chan. Otherwise, I’m gonna come in whether you like it or not.” He punctuated his words with another, more fervent, knock to the sliding wooden door. There was no response, leaving Makoto with no recourse other than pulling the door open in its track.

At first glance, it looked like the bathroom was empty of any occupants; just a tub filled to the brim with steaming water and discarded clothes littering the slippery tile floor. But when Makoto stepped into the humid room and got a better look into the rectangular tub, he saw a nude figure curled up in the fetal position beneath the water’s calm surface. Haru’s face looked so peaceful as he remained still under the water, but then a sudden fear overtook Makoto’s senses and he rushed forward with jerky movements.

“Haruka! What are you doing?!” His shouting voice echoed in the tiled room and he reached into the water to forcefully take hold of Haru’s bent elbow. Without any gentility or reservations, Makoto yanked Haru’s torso up above the waterline and caused a sudden commotion of splashing that left his jacket sleeves soaked as he grasped Haru’s bare shoulders in his massive hands. Water sloshed back and forth in the tub as Haru sputtered to catch his breath and scrub the excess moisture from his flushed face. Neither paid mind to the fact that he was naked (no jammers this time) because the level of comfort and familiarity between the two eighteen year olds was so unshakable. When Haru saw the raw emotion etched into Makato’s worried face, he averted his eyes and shrank into himself slightly.

“It’s peaceful…underwater.” Haruka admitted in a soft voice. He didn’t try to wiggle out of Makoto’s grasp, grateful for the physical sensation of being held so tightly. “I just wanted to stop feeling everything. Even for just a few minutes. I’m sorry I worried you though, Makoto.” He brought one arm out of the water to rest atop Makoto’s tense hand that still gripped his shoulder. That seemed to do the trick to settle the taller boy’s frayed nerves, and finally the tension began to evaporate. The sandy, olive-green haired boy let out a relieved breath and fell back to sit on his heels beside the tub. This wasn’t the first time he’d come across Haru completely submerged in his tub; but this wasn’t like those easy-going times.

“I’m gonna fix you some food, okay? Get dressed and join me when you’re ready.” Back to his nurturing and considerate ways, Makoto offered a small grin before rising back to his full height and stepping out of the bathroom. Haru watched his form disappear around the corner, his eyes half-lidded and looking faraway. If only Makoto had waited a few more minutes; maybe then everything could have faded into comforting oblivion like Haru wanted.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The official goodbye when Makoto left to attend Kyoto University was harder to withstand than Haru anticipated. A big group of people stood together at the Iwatobi train station, bidding farewell and wishing luck to the young man embarking on the next chapter of his life. Makoto’s mother and siblings cried as they got their last hugs in, while his father beamed with unbridled pride in his eldest son’s accomplishment. Nagisa and Rei were there, bidding Makoto goodbye with enthusiasm and something akin to jealousy; in just a year it would be their turn to leave Iwatobi to pursue higher education. Most of Makoto’s belongings that he’d need in college had already been shipped ahead of himself, so he just traveled with an overburdened duffle bag slung over one of his broad shoulders.

The train station was bustling with other passengers coming and going, making it a noisy and bustling setting that grated on the patience of one particular person. Haruka hung at the back of the group, watching the scene unfold with a handful of contradicting emotions playing out beneath the calm surface of his countenance. Given his recent circumstances, it was understandable that Haru wasn’t back to his old self yet; he had yet found reason to smile, laugh, or let his passive facade slip even once since his parent’s deaths just under two weeks ago. But he looked downright depressed now that Makoto’s departure had come down like an executioner’s sword. In another universe, one that Haru wished he could just switch places with, he would be joining Makoto on that train that was taking him to bigger and better things. Haru didn’t begrudge his best friend for heeding his advice to go on without him, but there was still a small voice in the back of his mind that railed against the injustice of it all. It felt as if all the light in his life was being taken away on that train, and there was nothing to be done that could prevent it.

It finally came time for two best friends, brothers in every way except through blood, to say goodbye. Haru stepped forward once Makoto’s family and their friends parted to give him some room, and came face to face with the only living person who truly understood and accepted him. There were unshed tears clinging to Makoto’s dark lashes as the two regarded each other for a quiet moment.

“You promise you’ll be there with me next year?” Makoto’s deep voice cracked from the strain of emotion. Haru’s fists clenched in the pockets of his hoodie, but he managed to nod his head in an acknowledgement of their pact. A staticy voice over the train’s intercom announced that departure was in five minutes. It spurred Makoto to suddenly drop his heavy bag where he stood so that he could lurch forward and pull Haruka into a tight embrace. Caught off guard only momentarily, the shorter boy returned the gesture by fisting his hands against Makoto’s back in the soft fabric of his loose shirt. Tears burned Haru’s stormy blue eyes as he pressed his cheek against his friend’s shoulder. He could feel Makoto’s impressive form quaking against him and swallowed the painful tightness in his throat.

“I’ll text you everyday and let you know when I plan on visiting. Make sure you let them take care of you and don’t stay sad for too long. It’s only a year and then you’ll be swimming with me again.” Makoto whispered for only Haru to hear.

“Only if you promise to have the time of your life, Mako-chan…and please don’t forget about me. I’m right behind you.” Haru said in a small, vulnerable voice that exposed just how much it all was affecting him. Even when taking into account every terrible experience in Haru’s eighteen years, this was truly the saddest moment in his life.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Days turned into weeks. Weeks turned into months. And eventually half a year had passed since Makoto’s exit from Haru’s life. The days immediately after were kept busy with handling legal obligations left hanging by his parent’s death. The Tachibana’s, and Nagisa and Rei, were a constant presence as well; always checking in on Haru to make sure he was eating and taking care of himself. For the first few weeks, it felt like a new normal that he could adjust to and come to count on. Nothing compared to having his steadfast companion at his side, but that was a foregone thing now that Makoto was busy with University. He and Haru did text frequently in the weeks following the start of term, but there was a gradual decline in interaction as soon as his hectic school schedule became all-consuming.

This pattern was mirrored in Haru’s relationships with the Tachibana family and his remaining friends, Nagisa and Rei. Those two had started their final year of high school, so Haru knew full-well just how demanding their school and swim club obligations were. Ren and Ran were also back in school, and the Tachibana parents found a new routine that revolved around the twins now that Makoto was out of the house. Of course they were always personable and friendly whenever they spotted or crossed paths with Haru, but the once daily invitations to dinner had now dwindled to bi-monthly at the most.

Slowly but surely, Haru felt himself disappearing to the periphery of everyone’s lives. His withdrawn and reserved ways didn’t exactly entice others to reach out, only to have their invitations and concerns rejected. Haruka began to hate himself for being so difficult and reclusive.The appropriate mourning period had ended, everyone expected him to resume a normal and productive life, but Haru was at a loss for what the correct next step was. He had no one guiding him through the tumultuous time in his young life, no one to demonstrate healthy coping techniques or even dragging his stubborn ass to a therapist. Even Makoto, his faithful friend since kindergarten who’d seen him through the worst moments in his life, had stopped reaching out. Their last correspondence was an impersonal birthday text Makoto had sent Haru on June 30th.

Food tasted like ash on his tongue. Nothing on TV or events in the real world drew his attention. Haru had become a shell of a person, having lost all sense of himself or something to live for. He stayed cooped up inside the desolate, cold house that’d been paid off by his parents before their passing. The meager savings they’d managed to accrue, as well as a small life-insurance policy, were the only things keeping Haru’s life from totally crumbling around him. But the money in his bank account kept disappearing without being replenished, and eventually Haru would be left without any means at all. Any part-time work he managed to find always ended up not lasting more than a few weeks. Bosses and managers didn’t want to deal with his obstinate attitude and flakey habits, and soon the town’s sympathy for Haru dried up as well. There was no one in his corner to offer support and understanding, no one to kick his ass and tell him how idiotic he was behaving. It was a very lonely existence.

Unsurprisingly, the only thing that provided any solace anymore was still swimming. Since Haru was avoiding social interaction as much as possible - namely running into Nagisa and Rei at the rec center or even just around Iwatobi - he took to swimming in the open ocean instead of a pristinely maintained indoor pool. The struggle of swimming against heavy waves and strong currents helped to quell the anxiety that raged inside Haruka. He spent his time on the white sandy beach near his house, most days from sunup to sundown, and the physical exertion began to reflect on Haru’s still developing body. If he had a better diet, there was no doubt that Haru would have built up considerable muscles that could rival even Makoto’s formidable physique. Strange that it took his life falling to pieces for Haru to finally experience the true freedom he’d so craved; only now he understood that the price was too great to bear alone.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Winter had come to Iwatobi, bringing weather too extreme for Haru to continue swimming in the open ocean. Without any other options available until Summer returned, he took to spending hours on end soaking in the bathtub. Haru had counted the number of tiles many times over, had learned how to turn the faucets to the perfect temperature using only his feet, and diligently worked at the ability to hold his breath underwater for up to two minutes now. Small victories. There was another habit that Haruka developed, one which was definitely unhealthy and served as a harrowing indication of just how lost he truly was.

As Haru lounged in the tub, completely submerged except for his face and one arm that hung lazily over the edge, an almost inaudible dripping sound broke the otherwise silent space. It wasn’t the faucet though. A single razor blade laid inconspicuously on the tiled floor below Haru’s limp, dangling hand. Its dangerous edge was coated with dried blood, and droplets of red fell around it to form a small pool. Haru’s arms were each covered in cuts of varying lengths and depths. Most were superficial, some were angry with the early stages of infection. The water he was currently soaking in had a pink tint to it, thanks to the bleeding wrist that fell to his side at the bottom of the tub. Even Haru’s toned stomach wasn’t invulnerable to the razor’s edge.

The momentary pain was like a cooling salve to the bitter emotions that afflicted Haruka Nanase on a daily basis. There was never any reprieve until he felt that familiar rush of adrenaline as the blade cut through his pale skin. Haru didn’t consider himself suicidal, but he had certainly become reckless with how he treated himself.

A chime echoed throughout the house suddenly, announcing the unexpected arrival of someone at Haru’s front door. His first thought was that either Ren or Ran had come over, hoping to pull Haru into one of their silly games. It could even be Kayako Tachibana standing there, either with leftovers in hand or an invitation for Haru to join them for dinner tomorrow. But the nearly pitch-black sky that Haru could see through his bathroom window told him that it was far too late in the evening for either of those scenarios to be true. He sank further into the bathtub in an attempt to ignore whoever bothered to come visit; but they continued insistently ringing the electric doorbell in a way too annoying to dismiss. A bothered expression pulled across Haru’s pretty face as he stared accusingly at the closed bathroom door.

Some minutes later, an irritated nineteen year old stalked towards the darkened foyer, taut body clad in just a thin cotton robe tied shut at his waist. The doorbell was still going off every few seconds, putting Haru on edge with each additional mechanical ring. Without bothering to look through the peephole to first verify whoever was standing out there, Haru opened the door with a dramatic flare. His azure eyes fell upon the figure of someone he’d never hoped to see again, and instantly all the color drained from Haru’s face.

“Haru-chan, it’s so good to see you again~” Jiro Nanase’s voice was just as sleezy as Haru remembered from his childhood. In spite of the fact that he now stood a good few inches taller than Jiro, Haruka felt instantly transformed into the small boy who’d been preyed upon by the devious man all those years ago. Jiro stepped into the house without invitation, and Haru was too stunned to offer any resistance before it was too late. Jiro was dressed in fine tailored clothes, stunk of cigarettes and heavy cologne, and oozed a certain arrogance that made Haru’s stomach churn. It’s as if the events of their last interaction were a figment of Haru’s imagination. “You shot up like a weed! You’ve got to be pushing six feet now.” The thirty-something mentioned with appraising eyes that raked across Haru’s fit body.

“Five-ten…actually,” The younger man corrected robotically, though why he felt the need to clarify eluded his understanding. Haru’s body was numb as he slid the heavy wooden door shut. There was a dryness in his mouth that hadn’t been there before, and an odd tremor in his hands that he couldn’t shake. “Oji-Jiro,” He started slowly, the name feeling strange after not being uttered for so many years. “Why are you here?”

“I wanted to see how you’re doing, now that you’ve been left alone.” Jiro sent his nephew a sympathetic look as he meandered aimlessly around the house’s open areas. The words cut through Haru like a hot blade, but this time the sensation brought him no satisfaction. He was rooted to the floor, unable to commit to either running away or confronting Jiro. “Your parents' deaths upset me greatly. Dying like that, burning to a crisp and choking on smoke, is probably the worst way to go.” The morbid description wasn’t something Haru had ever considered, and that caused bile to rise in the back of his throat. Tears stung his eyes, but he refused to show Jiro any hint of emotion.

“It’s been seven months.” Haru rebutted, stepping towards Jiro. “Why show up now?” He repeated his question, this time with a sterner voice. Jiro didn’t answer immediately. He was busy gazing at a family portrait that hung on the wall near the stairs, depicting Haru as an exuberant nine year old posing with his smiling parents.

“I’m here to take care of you, Haru-chan. We’re the last of the Nanase family, and all we have left in this world. We should take care of each other now. Don’t you think?” Jiro turned to fully face his nephew, projecting warmth and comfort as best he could. If Haru had a better grasp of his self-worth, it would have proved useless against him. But being so vulnerable and starved for affection had left him desperate to cling to anyone who showed any interest in being around him. An internal battle of hatred and anguish raged inside him, but still Haru couldn’t bring himself to react. When Jiro finally approached to close the distance between them, slow and methodical like a predator stalking its cornered prey, Haru brought a hand up to stop him with a palm to the man’s flat, strong chest.

“Haruka, doesn’t it hurt to be alone?” Jiro’s manly voice dropped to something softer now and he still took another step into Haru’s personal space even as the younger man kept a hand against his chest. Haru averted his eyes as his face heated up in a pretty flush against his cheeks. It was then that the sleeve of Haru’s robe slid further up his forearm, exposing the array of fresh and old cuts that marred the beautiful skin of his wrist. Jiro instantly spotted it and a pained expression crossed his face. “What have you done to yourself?” His tone wasn’t accusatory, but actually sympathetic and caring; Haru almost didn’t recognize the man anymore.

With a gentle touch, Jiro grasped Haru’s delicate wrist in his calloused hand and turned it towards his face as he brought his head down. Lips met the cuts with a tender peck, sparking something that Haru didn’t know still existed in him. A single tear slid down the side of his face at the sight of his once loathed uncle treating him with such grace and compassion.

“No more of this, my Haruka…You’re too beautiful to be scarred in such a way.” Jiro pulled his nephew into an embrace, his muscular arms wrapping around the boy’s waist as if they did this everyday. Haru was frozen as his chin came to rest on his uncle’s shoulder, arms feeling heavy like lead at his sides. “I won’t ever leave you, Haruka. Never again. Oji-Jiro is here to make everything better.” These were the words that Haru had been so desperate to hear for the past six months. Even a perfect stranger could have said them and Haru would have thrown himself at them. The fact that he had a history with Jiro that was fraught with emotional manipulation and abuse didn’t outweigh Haru’s need for connection. Burying his face into Jiro’s neck, two weak arms came up to wrap around the shorter man’s brawny shoulders in acceptance of the embrace.

Chapter Text

“I gotta hand it to you,” Rin Matsuoka said in a casual tone as he sipped at a plastic cup filled with green matcha milk tea, the bottom half of the container dotted with black pearls of tapioca. “This place is pretty great. Like something off a postcard.” What he was referring to was Iwatobi’s idyllic setting. He’d never been to a sleepy coastal town like this before, having spent all of his time in the more central parts of Japan. The closest his experiences came to matching Iwatobi were from his childhood spent in Australia.

Though having been born and raised in Japan for the first five years of his life, Rin often felt more connected to the country of Australia since he lived there until the age of fifteen. The nature of his father’s governmental work had them relocated to the other country for a time, and it granted Rin and his little sister, Gou, dual citizenship. It was in Australia that Rin discovered his love for swimming, and because he lived a very privileged life of means and opportunity, he attended a well-respected swim academy while there. That passion followed Rin when he had to relocate back to Japan with his mother and sister just before his sixteenth birthday following his father’s untimely death. Cancer was a bitch and had robbed the maroon-haired boy of years with the most influential presence in his life. It was a wound he tried to keep hidden, but one that tended to rear its ugly head from time to time.

While Rin didn’t have aspirations to pursue swimming as a serious career, he did plan on using it as a means of getting through college. Lucky him that Kyoto University had a full-ride swimming scholarship that came available at the eleventh hour! He even got to take the dorm assignment that’d been left vacant, which landed him to be roommates with Makoto Tachibana. It took a few weeks before the truth was revealed; the only reason Rin had such strokes of luck was because Makoto’s best friend had been forced to postpone his college plans. That always left a bitter taste in the red-head’s mouth whenever he thought too much about it. It took a few semesters for him to finally settle on majoring in criminal justice, but Rin was just relieved to have finally found something that interested him so much. He had aspirations of someday becoming a detective with the Tokyo police, believing with his whole being that would have made his father proud.

“I’m glad you think so! Not everyone sees its charms.” Makoto said with a smile as he gripped a plastic straw between his teeth. He was drinking a tapioca milk tea beverage as well, only his was flavored with coffee. The two friends sat together at a small table outside the small boba tea shop, lazily sipping their drinks while making idle conversation to kill time. Today was the grand opening of Iwatobi High School’s newly renovated outdoor pool.

“It’s got this low-key, chilled out vibe that I really like. Way different from Kyoto. Shit, way different from Australia!” Rin let out a short laugh that turned into a cheeky smile, exposing his rows of uniquely sharp pearly-whites. Makoto had inquired about them on day one of their meeting, and Rin freely explained that it was simply a genetic trait inherited from his father’s side of the family. After his baby teeth had fallen out, the permanent replacements grew back shaped like triangles. Kids used to tease him with names like ‘shark boy’ or ‘razor mouth’, but Rin was impervious to their bullying. His dad - his hero - had the same abnormality and was someone people greatly admired. Why wouldn’t he want to be just like his father?

Makoto tapped the flat surface of his phone, activating the screen to switch back on, and saw that the time was nearing for them to head towards the school. He shot Nagisa a text asking when he and Rei expected to be there, then set the device back on the glass table-top. He took a long draw from the coffee drink, then chewed on the pearls of tapioca that popped into his mouth through the thick straw.

“It’s pretty peaceful, and a lot of stuff is getting renovated or updated. So it’s only a matter of time before more people figure out how great it is to live here. I’m glad I get to come back.” There was a beat of comfortable silence between the two friends as they each mulled over their own thoughts. It was Saturday and people were going about their business around them, each absorbed in their own lives and goings-on.

A pair of high school aged girls passed by, arms linked at the elbows as they chatted in hushed voices, and both took notice of the attractive college aged boys sitting outside the tea shop. Rin met their gazes first and offered a friendly smile, followed by Makoto turning in his seat to see what had his friend’s attention, which then caused the girls to hide shy grins behind their demure hands. They went on their merry way though, and the wholesome exchange was over almost as soon as it started. Makoto chuckled to himself and shared a knowing smile with Rin; neither of them was attracted to the opposite gender, but often found themselves being approached by young women with amorous intent. Thankfully, neither was the other’s ideal type and had never even entertained the idea of pursuing something romantic between them.

“Oh, Nagisa texted back finally. He and Rei just left their parent’s houses and are headed to the school.” Makoto checked the time on his phone as he sent a short text back to his blonde friend. “If we leave now, we’ll be there in about thirty minutes.” He sucked back the remaining drink in a few long draws on the straw, then stood up from the table with a scrap of his chair’s feet against concrete. Rin followed suit and finished his drink quickly, tossing the now empty plastic cup into the nearest trash can. The two straightened their clothes and Makoto led the way throughout Iwatobi towards the high school.

He was dressed in a plain white t-shirt, perfectly fit to cling attractively to his broad shoulders but fit a bit looser around his trim midsection. Over that, he had on the iconic white and blue Iwatobi swim club jacket he’d gotten during his time in high school. Underneath a pair of dark gray sweatpants with their university’s name printed down the leg, Makoto wore his favorite pair of long-legged swimskins, black with sleek green designs that accentuated the muscles of his legs. A Nike drawstring bag hung off his left shoulder, stuffed with his swim cap, goggles, and a change of clothes.

Rin was a bit more dressed up since he wasn’t participating in the swimming event. He wore a slightly oversized light blue denim jacket over a tight fitting white v-neck shirt. His legs were clad in a pair of charcoal colored jeans that bunched slightly at the ankles where it met blue converse hightops. His shaggy, maroon hair was pulled back into an effortlessly attractive half-ponytail, his default styling born out of utility rather than aesthetic. But that was all hidden by the well-worn black baseball cap tugged over his crown. Though he couldn’t compare to Makoto’s deltoids and trapezius muscles, Rin had him beat when it came to pectorals, biceps, triceps, and the flexors in his forearms. He was beefy and compact in all the right places, looking perfectly proportioned with his tall frame that sat atop thick thighs. The two had become gym rats in college and still planned to continue the habit once they moved to Iwatobi in a few weeks.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Mako-chan!” A bright, bubbly voice rose above the general chatter going on at the outdoor pool facility, drawing the attention of many and causing Makoto to grin sheepishly as he and Rin stepped into view. Nagisa Hazuki came bounding up to his old friend with the same energy from early childhood; not even adulthood had managed to dampen his natural exuberance. Rei was following right behind him, weaving through the groups of people that idled around the pool, muttering polite apologies and begging their pardon. He was just as eager to reunite with Makoto.

“Nagisa! Rei!” Makoto shouted excitedly, though even his raised voice came out soft and warm. The three of them met in the middle, in an area otherwise unoccupied by other event goers, grabbing at forearms and clapping shoulders in their eagerness to show affection and camaraderie. It felt like no time had passed at all since high school with how instant their familiarity resurfaced. Rin hung back a few feet, hands in his jacket pockets and a crooked smile tugging on his lips at how adorable the scene played out. The three of them were lost in a world all their own as they quickly caught each other up on their lives.

Nagisa Hazuki was a petite little thing with shaggy honey-blonde locks and charming magenta eyes that were framed by long, pale lashes. He was already reduced to his swimwear, a pair of black jammers with sleek pink designs that ended just above his knees, and the same white and blue swim club jacket that Makoto had worn. Rei was wearing his as well; they all seemed to have the same mind when it came to enjoying a shared sense of nostalgia. Both of them had their swim caps tucked in the waistband of their swimwear, and goggles dangling against their collarbones. Nagisa’s round face was cute, a little too child-like for Rin’s tastes, but he could clearly see that the tall, bespectacled man standing next to Nagisa had already claimed him. Rei Ryugazaki was the same height as Makoto, but appeared taller because of his willowy frame. His long-legged swimskins looked just like Makoto’s, only they were marked with deep blue accents instead of green. His muscles were cut and well defined, but not as bulked up as Makoto and certainly not as much as Rin.

The newly renovated Iwatobi High School pool facilities were quite nice, though Rin had no basis to compare it with. He hadn’t been there when the founding members had taken it upon themselves to clean up the neglected pool so that the club could be formed and taken seriously. So the transformation to what it was now was only somewhat impressive for the red-head. The pool had been re-tiled and cracks professionally fixed so that the bottom looked brand new and untouched. The plastic divider lines had been upgraded, and starting blocks reinstalled with sturdier designs that looked closer to what professionals used at training facilities. The club house and changing rooms had been completely gutted and refurbished with new metal lockers, overhead faucet heads in the re-tiled showers, and a small steam room as well. All in all, this was a pretty awesome renovation that definitely elevated the Iwatobi Swim Club to a new level.

There were about twenty or so other club members, some who still attended the school and some who had graduated since Nagisa and Rei’s time there. Those who were still students had organized quite an impressive spread of food and drinks. Friends and family of past and present swim club members ambled about in various conversations, and above that Rin could hear upbeat music playing over the outdoor speaker system. The overall atmosphere of the event was friendly and enthusiastic; much like Iwatobi as a whole. It was feeling more and more like his decision to relocate there with Makoto had been the best he could have made.

“Rin, don’t be antisocial!” Makoto beckoned his roommate with a quick wave. When he stepped into the trio’s space, Nagisa and Rei instantly made him feel welcomed. “Guys, Rin Matsuoka. Rin, Nagisa Hazuki and Rei Ryugazaki.” Makoto hooked a thick arm around Rin’s neck and gestured between him and the two others. Rin just let out a quick laugh and held his hand out for either of the others to take first. Rei met his palm with a firm handshake, and they exchanged amiable looks. Then the empty space at the center of their group was filled with Nagisa, who was busying himself by grasping Rin’s flexed bicep.

“Woooooow~” He said in an amazed tone, transfixed by Rin’s muscular arm. “You must work out a lot! I bet you look really good without a shirt on.” A sputtering sound came from Rei at the same time Rin let out a big laugh, already charmed by Nagisa’s lack of tact or guile. Makoto’s face lit up with a bright flush, but he was hiding his laughter behind a hand across his smiling mouth.

“Nagisa-kun! That’s sort of inappropriate to say to someone you just met.” Rei wasn’t actually mad, but more so sheepish about this being Rin’s first impression of his spontaneous boyfriend. Nagisa released Rin’s arm and stepped into Rei’s side, looping his arms around the wiry man’s toned waist. He could get away with anything so long as he showered Rei with physical affection right afterwards.

“It’s fine. No biggie. I bulked up in college and I’ve been trying to keep it on since graduation. Nice to be noticed!” Rin said in a well-meaning, cocky voice that had Makoto rolling his eyes with a grin.

“Don’t pay him anymore compliments, Nagisa. Rin’s neck can’t support a bigger head than what he’s already got.” This earned Makoto a fake-punch to the gut from Rin, which he automatically recoiled from with a burst of laughter. The four of them fell into companionable conversation, but then Nagisa noticed the time and waved his hands to get their attention.

“Mako-chan, you should go get changed. They want us to be ready for the medley relay in like ten minutes.” The short blonde nodded towards the clubhouse at the other end of the pool. The olive green haired boy nodded quickly and took off in that direction with long, urgent strides. Rin took the opportunity to scope out the food, having eyed a few of the hors d'oeuvres already. As he started piling a blue plastic plate full of finger foods, paying no mind to different samplings touching each other, Rei sidled up next to him.

“I’m glad to see Makoto-senpai made such a great friend in college. Nagisa and I feel bad that our closeness to him dwindled so much, but it’s a relief to know he was well taken care of. Thank you, Matsuoka-kun.” Rei surprised Rin with his introspective sentiment, and for a moment the red-head was lost for words. He nodded stiffly while stacking a few more pan fried gyoza onto the plate, popping the last one into his mouth before stepping away from the food table to give the next person room.

“Rin is just fine. And it was my luck to get assigned as his roommate. Makoto seriously made it so easy being away from my family. I don’t know what I’d do without him.” He revealed while chewing the delicious food, hiding his mouth with his hand out of politeness. Nagisa, overhearing their conversation, appeared back at Rei’s side to interject.

“You know who his roommate was supposed to be, right?” He asked in a serious tone, his pretty eyes gazing up at Rin knowingly. Rei made a ‘tch’ sound and gave his boyfriend a subtle nudge, trying to reign in Nagisa’s boldness a bit. They’d only just met Rin; there was no need in intimidating him to the point it’d make things awkward for Makoto. Nagisa hissed softly when Rei’s sharp elbow met his arm, shooting him an irksome look.

“Yeah…he told me about how things went down with Nanase.” This was really not the conversation Rin expected to have right off the bat after meeting Makoto’s friends. It seemed that Haruka Nanase cast a long shadow of influence, even when he wasn’t present or hadn’t been around the old group of friends in some years. He was starting to turn into an intimidating figure in Rin Matsuoka’s mind, who built a perception of someone so grandiose and amazing to still be captivating his friend’s minds and conversations. He didn’t fully understand that it was because Nagisa, Rei, and Makoto harbored such deeply regretful sentiments about their handling of Haru’s situation that they couldn’t stop themselves from bringing him up now that they were all back together.

“Haru-chan and Mako-chan have been best friends since kindergarten. Not even I know them as well as they do each other. It really messed Haru up that they couldn’t go to college together.” Nagisa knew this information might make Rin feel a certain way, but he wanted to be sure that the new addition to their friend group understood Makoto and Haru’s background; and the possible field of landmines he was entering. A cold hand came up to firmly grip the back of Nagisa’s slender neck, and it registered in his mind that Rei wanted him to drop the topic now. It wasn’t an overbearing or demeaning gesture between them; it was simply Rei trying to help Nagisa avoid putting his foot in his mouth or inadvertently hurting someone’s feelings. This was something between them that they’d discussed and agreed was necessary, as Nagisa’s maturation seemed to have stalled at the age of eighteen.

“Jeez. I hope the guy doesn’t hate me. You’ve got me nervous now.” Rin tried to make a joke and popped a thick slice of pickled cucumber into his mouth, instantly savoring the soy sauce and vinegar taste as he chewed. When Rei and Nagisa exchanged worried glances, he swallowed his food and nerves. “What’s that look for?”

“We haven’t spoken to Haruka-senpai in almost three years. If he comes here hating anyone, it’ll be us and Makoto-senpai.” Rei spoke with a cryptic voice, but Nagisa tried to lighten the blow with his never-failing optimism.

“Maybe the fact that he agreed to come today is a sign that he still wants us all to be friends! Don’t give up hope!” He said with a bright smile, which Rei couldn’t help but return.

Over in the changing area of the clubhouse, Makoto shut the metal door of a tall locker with a soft clanging sound. His Nike bag and the clothes he’d worn over his swimskins were safely stored away until after the event. A few of the locker cubbies were in use as well by the other swim club members in attendance that day, since most certainly some good-natured races were sure to break out after the initial medley relay was finished. The facility really had been updated quite nicely. There were gleaming metal lockers that lined the walls, with dark benches at the center. At the end of the room were the private toilets, then the open shower area with short dividing walls that offered some sense of propriety. On the other side was the small steam room that Makoto was seriously jealous hadn’t been available to them while they were in high school. Thankfully, the gym he’d been employed at had a massive steam room that he was anxious to utilize.

With his swim cap tucked into the waistband of his skintight jammers and goggles hanging off his thick neck, Makoto padded out of the tiled locker room with bare feet, absentmindedly stretching his shoulder muscles by pulling each arm across his defined chest. The clubhouse was silent other than the noises he made, but he could hear the music and chatter going on just outside the frosted glass doors.

There was an area beyond the locker room that looked like a general hangout spot for the members of the swim club. With a matching leather couch and chair set and a giant rectangular chabudai at the center of the room, Makoto could easily envision the current club members chilling out, doing homework, and discussing club topics in such a comfortable setting. There was a huge standing glass display case pushed up against the far back wall, and the trophies were illuminated with accent lighting built into the underside of the wooden shelves. As Makoto passed by it on his way out to the pool, something caught his eye. His steps slowed, then redirected to take him over to the tall glass case. On a shelf that was nearly at his eye-level sat a framed picture that instantly sparked a memory he greatly cherished.

The four founding members were gathered to have their picture taken just after having won a medley relay race against their rival school. Makoto, Rei, Nagisa, and Haruka were all huddled together in a mass of overlapping water-soaked limbs, all smiles and beaming with pride. Even Haru’s usually impassive face had cracked one of his shy grins, making that picture a precious rarity. Would the Haruka Nanase who was coming today resemble the younger version of himself that was in this picture? Even just a little? Makoto made a silent prayer that his friend would be a happier person than what he remembered from their last time together.

When Makoto emerged outside again, catching a few glances from the other event goers who appreciated seeing such a well-built figure before them, he was instantly spotted by the energetic swim club manager, Tobi Yamogata, who’d organized the event.

“Tachibana-senpai! Come on! The others are already stretching and getting ready.” He was a short young man with light brown hair and honey-colored eyes, wearing a zipped up Iwatobi swim club jacket over his own pair of jammers. Tobi tugged on Makoto’s elbow eagerly in the direction where Nagisa and Rei were standing poolside, going through the usual warm-up stretches that were as familiar as riding a bike. Their swim caps were already in place, goggles resting at the crest of their foreheads in preparation for the medley relay. Makoto joined the other two in stretching, asking for assistance from Rei in helping to stretch his back. His eyes cut across the busy crowd of people that ambled around the pool, hoping to spot Haru’s familiar face. “You and Hazuki-senpai will be at that end of the pool, and Ryugazaki-senpai and Nanase-senpai will be at this one. I’ve got your best recorded times already logged in my phone, and we’ll see how well you do compared to them! We’re all rooting for you!”

The three older swimmers instantly felt a renewed pressure fall onto their shoulders; what if they didn’t stack up to their best times from when they swam competitively? Rei was nearly beside himself with anxiety. He rarely swam these days! At least Nagisa found time each week to do a few laps at their gym’s pool, and Makoto was about to start coaching! Apparently the worry was evident on his narrow face, because Nagisa placed a reassuring hand against his shoulder that instantly helped to calm Rei’s frayed nerves. They shared a private smile between them that conveyed a deep level of mutual admiration, which Makoto noticed but kindly didn’t mention.

“Haru-chan is running late.” Makoto mentioned to himself as he stretched his hamstrings, though he was loud enough to catch Tobi’s attention.

“Nope! He just showed up. Right on time, Nanase-senpai!” Tobi shouted over the crowd, waving his hand excitedly to draw the newcomer over to them. In perfect unison, Makoto, Rei, and Nagisa’s hearts skipped a collective beat and stomachs flipped with shared apprehension. This was it. The moment they had all been hoping for and dreading. There was no going back now that Haruka Nanase had arrived. Time seemed to move slowly as all three former teammates stood up tall to watch a familiar figure weaving through the throngs of people. But as he got closer and his features became clearer, they were all left speechless.

It was as if Haru’s arrival triggered the clouds to part and allow bright sunlight to beam down across the area, casting everything in a warm mid-day glow. He stood at roughly the same 5’10” height they remembered him being, his lustrous, dusty black hair was still styled in a similar low-maintenance and effortlessly neat cut with a section of bangs that dipped between his dark eyebrows. The bright cerulean irises of his large eyes shone as strikingly as before. Haru even wore the same style of jammers as he did in high school, with purple racing lines that drew attention to his thighs and crotch. And over his torso, the Iwatobi swim club jacket hung just a bit tighter than it once had. There was even an apathetic look on his face that was all too familiar as well, with eyes half-lidded and mouth relaxed in a neutral expression. However, that’s where any similarities he had with his past self ended.

In the four-plus years since high school graduation, Haru’s body had been reinvented into something usually reserved for fashion magazines or really top-dollar porn. His beautiful face was practically androgynous now, not overly masculine or feminine with delicate features and a strong jawline. His inky black lashes fanned out in long arcs against his cheek, and his lips had the perfect ratio of thinness and pout.

“Nanase-senpai! Let me take your jacket for you. Do you need time to stretch or get ready?” Tobi sprung up next to Haruka with a youthful enthusiasm, gazing up at him with absolute adoration. Haru was something of an idol, a mythical figure, to the generations of swim club members that followed after him. He simply shook his head and shed the white and blue jacket off his shoulders to hand it to the younger student. Tobi held it like he’d been handed the holy grail, hugging it to his chest as if some of Haru’s ability might rub off on him.

Haruka’s flawless skin glowed in the sunlight, and there wasn’t a single blemish or freckle to be seen. Back in high school, his body had already been enviable with washboard abs and well defined upper-arms. But the person standing there now looked like he’d been sculpted with the utmost care and intention. His pecs were raised and tight, traps and delts rolling with strength, but the graceful tilt of his neck and the curve of his defined collarbone evened out the masculinity of his build. Scandalously, there was a small silver barbell pierced through his left nipple, causing the pink nub to stand at attention slightly more than its counterpart on the right side of his chest. The skin of Haru’s back and sides were taut with accents of each minor muscle group and his ribs causing attractive, subtle indentations.

This all naturally led to the erotic dips that formed the well-defined ‘v’ of his lower-abdominal area. His backside curved attractively and was well proportioned with the rest of him, but there was only the slightest jiggle to accompany each footfall. He was pure muscle, almost no fat to be found. From there, Haru’s tight thighs were outlined by the black jammers that clung to his form like the second-skin they were. His calves were strong and the muscles became jagged as he rolled onto the balls of his feet, only to relax into softer angles when he rocked back onto his heels. Much like the aquatic animal that Haruka had such an affinity for, his body was completely hairless. Scratch that; hairless with the exception of the light trail of dark traces of it that started just a few inches below his small belly button only to disappear behind the waistline of his jammers. All in all, Haru had attained the perfect mix of lithe musculature that didn’t look too bulky or willowy on his tall frame. He was still delicate where it counted, namely his feminine wrists and narrow ankles.

Could someone’s beauty be both effortless and manufactured at the same time?

He was otherworldly standing before his gob-smacked former teammates, who gawked and stared with unabashed shock at Haru’s transformation. One other person who’d been struck by the sight was Rin Matsuoka. He’d hung back by the food table, working on his second plate of food, when Haru casually strolled into view like a God descending among mortals. All the moisture in his mouth transferred to the palms of his strong hands, which momentarily faltered in keeping a good hold on the plate of food. Never before had someone so instantaneously and effortlessly captured Rin’s attraction.

Without a second thought, he disposed of the half-finished plate of food by dropping it into the receptacle stationed right next to him. After taking a moment to wipe his palms free of any crumbs or grease, as well as wicking away some of the sweat, Rin stepped forward to introduce himself to the enigmatic Haruka Nanase. But any plan of triggering a ‘meet-cute’ with him was cut off by Tobi’s shrill whistle that broke through the chatter. Every conversation cut short instantly and all eyes turned to look at the confident young man.

“Now that all the founding members have arrived, we can commence with the medley relay! Just as they did in the final race that won them first place at nationals, Tachibana-senpai will swim backstroke, Ryugazaki-senpai will swim butterfly, Nanase-senpai will swim free, and Hazuki-senpai will swim breast. It’s time to see if our school’s legends can match their best recorded times! Please, everyone gather round the pool as the swimmers take their marks.” Tobi really had a way with crowd management and riling up enthusiasm; must be why he’d been made manager of the swim club now.

Any chance that Rin, or the others for that matter, had to speak with Haruka before the event were dashed. Makoto and Nagisa left to go stand at the middle lane on one end of the pool, and Rei and Haruka mimicked this on the other end of the same lane. The blue-haired man offered Haru a well-meaning smile as they walked shoulder-to-shoulder, but the other either didn’t notice or didn’t care because there was no response. It unnerved Rei, but he quickly recovered and tried to refocus his attention on the task at hand - not making a fool of himself. He bent down to dip his red-tinted goggles into the chilled pool water, then fixed them against his eyes until there was the right amount of suction and pressure. Behind him, Haru had just pulled his swim cap over his hair and copied Rei’s technique of wetting his dark blue-tinted goggles in the water before slipping them into place.

Makoto and Nagisa had their goggles in place by then as well, and the tallest of the team slipped into the water with minimal splash since he was the first leg of the medley. People clambered to get a good viewing spot around the pool’s edge, eagerly waiting for the starting gun to go off. Makoto’s heart was racing in his barrel chest as he grasped the parallel vertical bars that jutted out from the metal starting platform above him. Powerful arm and shoulder muscles hoisted him into the crouching starting position for the backstroke, the balls of his feet pressing against the gritty surface of the pool’s wall to give him good enough purchase to kick off from.

Tightly coiled like a spring aching for release, Makoto listened for the loud pop of the starting gun. When it went off, echoing slightly in the outdoor space, he launched himself backwards in a graceful arc that slipped underwater as he dolphin kicked with powerful, paddle-like legs. When his face broke the water’s surface again, Makoto’s arms began moving in windmill-like movements that worked in time with his kicking feet. Everyone erupted with excited cheers as the twenty-two year old cut across the lane with serious haste. He was in pique form, not rusty at all, which was to be expected thanks to his continuing to swim throughout college.

Rin screamed his support for Makoto from somewhere close behind Nagisa, lowkey wishing he could have participated in the medley relay as well. Makoto’s hand touched the pool’s edge and he dropped his feet so that he was treading water instead of flat on his back.

“Rei!” He shouted, but the sleek-muscled man was already mid-dive, casting a shadow over Makoto’s head. Now that his turn was over, Makoto reached up over the pool’s ledge in order to pull himself out of the water. He made it look effortless as his torso came up and over the ledge, followed by a twist that ended with him sitting there next to the starting platform and feet kicking in the water.

“Good luck, Haru-chan.” He said in a voice loud enough for only the other swimmer to hear. Makoto pulled his green-tinted goggles off and rubbed his eyes free of water and indentations before glancing up at the swimmer poised to dive in at any moment. Haru’s goggles were too dark for anyone to see where his focus lay, but he spared Makoto a glance upon hearing the words of support. There was no other acknowledgement to be seen, by Makoto or anyone else. His mind was a jumbled mess of emotions that needed to be pushed aside for the sake of performing well at this medley relay. But somewhere deep inside, it felt good to hear that voice wishing him luck again. Maybe coming today would be worth suffering the emotional turmoil of seeing his friends again after so long.

What Rei had lost in strength and speed from his time away from swimming, he made up for with technique and form. His butterfly stroke was efficient and truly beautiful, as it caused the water to splash and arc in the same swooping motions of his long arms. Nagisa startled a few people with his sudden outburst of loud encouragement, but everyone laughed it off a moment later. He smiled endearingly at his lover’s valiant effort, and got into position to dive in as soon as that familiar hand hit the pool wall. Rei’s hand smacked against the wall and he barely had a chance to watch Nagisa dive over his head, because he was too focused on finding his strength and breath again after such strenuous physical exertion.

’Fucking kill me!’ His inner-monologue screeched as he managed to hoist himself out of the pool, bringing one knee up and out of the water against the pool’s ledge. There was suddenly an open palm extended to him, and he looked up at Rin’s handsome, smiling face with a surprised expression of his own. Thankful for the lend of strength, Rei grasped it and allowed Rin to pull him to his feet in one fluid motion.

“You had really great form!” Rin shouted over the crowd, clapping Rei’s wet, bare shoulder. The other was too busy sucking air in through his nose and exhaling with a long wheeze to answer verbally, but Rei did manage to offer a ‘thumbs up’ gesture as he turned to watch Nagisa finish the breaststroke leg of the medley.

Nagisa’s head and shoulders popped above the water in regular intervals, each time getting closer and closer to the other end of the pool. His speed was impressive and there was an exhilarated look on his face each time he came up for air. He fed off the crowd’s energy and knew that Rei was part of it, cheering him on. As he approached the end of the lane, Haru hunched over and dug his feet into the starting platform, prepared to launch himself forward at the moment Nagisa’s hand met the pool’s wall.

His sharp eyes saw the moment of contact underwater and he dove forward, arms stretched out with fingertips touching like the spade of a shovel. Just like in high school, he was the picture of absolute perfection as his streamlined body entered the pool with the smallest of disturbances to the water’s surface. His dolphin kick was unrivaled in grace and effectiveness, propelling him forward underwater until his back arched and head broke the surface. Like a machine, unhampered by human error or fatigue, his arms cut through the water in perfect sweeping motions as his knifed hands pushed against the water tension like oars. The crowd’s volume actually went quiet for the first half of Haru’s lap, astonished that he not only matched his legendary high school abilities; but exceeded them by a significant margin.

As Haru neared the end of the lane, the onlookers resumed their boisterous cheering and erupted in thunderous applause as his palm slapped against the wall with a satisfying finality. Only slightly out of breath, he gracefully pulled himself out of the pool without any jerky movements or hesitation. Younger club members rushed forward like fans flocking to their idol, all bright-eyed and smiling up at him like he was the second coming of Christ. He balked slightly at all the praise being heaped onto him; this was the most intense outpouring of positive attention he’d received in years, and it was a little jarring. These days, he was much more accustomed to staying under most people’s radars and out of the limelight.

“Nanase-senpai! How did you get to be so fast?” One boy asked desperately as he grabbed Haru’s wet elbow. Another one tapped his shoulder to get his attention.

“What kind of training regiment do you follow? What’s your diet?” The questions were never ending. As well-intentioned as they might be, it was quickly overwhelming the normally aloof young man. Haruka pulled his goggles and swim cap away from his head in one easy motion, looking in the crowd for the familiar face who could come rescue him from such Hell. But what he saw instead were a pair gleaming red eyes that stared heatedly at him from the back of the crowd. Haru blinked his owlish eyes a few times, struck by the handsome, mysterious figure watching him from afar.

’Who’s that?’ He wondered.

Chapter Text

“So…you excited?” Hoping to fill the silence in the luxury interior of Sousuke’s bright red Lexus LS, a loaner car provided by none other than Jiro Nanase, the thirty two year old spoke up for the first time since Haruka had slid into the passenger seat twenty minutes ago. They were on their way to Iwatobi High School for Haru to participate in the swimming event he’d RSVP’d to. It was a beautiful Saturday, that day in July, and seemingly perfect for outdoor activities. Haru’s posture in the red trimmed, black leather passenger seat was relaxed and looked almost boneless in the way he slumped lazily with an elbow propped against the window and fist supporting his cheek. That’s how he usually held himself, no matter the situation; and Sousuke often tried to correct his shity posture over the years. Sousuke could almost make out the reflection of his serious expression in the passenger window, blue eyes staring out at nothing over the ocean horizon. They drove along a stretch of road that had the perfect view of Iwatobi’s beach, which the younger man would have much preferred to be enjoying on such a bright, warm day.

“Not sure ‘excited’ is the word I’d use.” Haru answered cryptically, offering no follow up to clarify or elaborate on the words. He was wearing his trademark knee-length, purple accented jammers and the old Iwatobi swim club team jacket, zipped up to chin and obscuring the view of his mouth slightly. His bare feet were clad in a pair of fashionable waterproof slip-on trainers, leaving his nimble ankles exposed. The Iwatobi town-scape rolled by as they steadfastly approached the school, driving into more residential areas as they turned away from the coastal highway they’d been on thus far.

“Hey, at least it’s different. And you’ve gotta feel something about seeing your old friends again.” Sousuke was trying to reel even a modicum of emotion out of Haru, all to no avail. His passenger remained as passive as always, giving the smallest ‘hm’ as a response. While his job description was only that of retainer or handler - even though no single word could fully encompass every facet of Sousuke’s duties where it regarded Haruka Nanase - he felt something akin to brotherly protectiveness towards the younger man. There were many things that prevented Sousuke from helping Haru in the ways he needed most, so he tried to go the extra mile in other avenues; one of them being to help Haru retain as much of his humanity and sense of worth as possible. Maybe interacting with friends from a bygone era would also reinvigorate parts of Haru that had become dormant in the past few years.

“I’ll go park the car. You’re already pushing ‘fashionably late’ as it is.” Sousuke pulled up to the front of the high school, which was eerily void of any activity. It was the closest he could get Haru to the outdoor pool facility, which was located a ways behind the high school’s main building. Haru looked at the time on the dashboard’s touchscreen and saw that it was already close to 2:30 pm. Without a word, he stepped out of the car and onto the familiar grounds of Iwatobi High School. Sousuke drove off the moment Haru shut the passenger door behind him, and then he was left to his own devices. There was an odd mix of emotions tumbling through Haru’s mind as he passed across the empty courtyard, rounding the massive building headed in the direction of the sports fields and pool facility. The faint sound of music and overlapping conversations told him that the event was well underway, and soon Haru was ascending a flight of concrete stairs that saw him finally arrive at the party; thirty minutes late and not even sorry.

Before anyone took notice of the latecomer standing in the shade, Haru released a shuddering breath that he hoped would take some of his anxiety and dread with it. Somewhere in this busy crowd were his old teammates; his best friends from days gone by. How different would they be now? How different would they find him to be? There were so many unsaid things hanging between them all. It felt damn near impossible, navigating back to a place of friendship through those unacknowledged feelings. So why had he agreed to come?

’Too late to turn back now.’ Haruka resigned himself and stepped out from around the corner and into the sunlight, struck by how similar and yet different the pool was. The cherry blossom trees that surrounded the pool facility were bare this late in the year, but Haru could distinctly remember a time when they had once been in glorious bloom as he and the others swam without a care in the world. A wave of nostalgia overcame the young man, but it didn’t register on his face. Blue eyes scanned the area in search of a ‘Tobi Yamogata’ that was responsible for organizing the entire event. Wandering further into the mulling throngs of people, Haru ignored the pointed stares he received from those he passed by. Suddenly, a loud voice calling his name broke out above the ambient sound of various conversations and music.

“Right on time, Nanase-senpai!” A youthful voice that cracked with the evidence of puberty called Haru’s name. There was a short, young student gesturing Haru over towards himself, and he assumed that must be Tobi. Haru unzipped his jacket in preparation of taking it off, then shoved his hands into the pockets where he felt his swim cap and goggles resting securely. Fixing his face with a blase expression that belied just how distressed he really was, Haru wove through the open spaces between groups of people and approached Tobi. Right beside him were Makoto, Nagisa, and Rei as they went through a familiar set of stretches; though they all froze when he came into view.

It was like he’d been transported back in time. The three of them were even wearing the same style of swimskins and jammers as they had in high school. The changes brought on by four years' difference were miniscule in Haru’s perception. At that moment, they were the same as he remembered. His heart swelled with sharp emotion in a way that initially concerned Haru, because he hadn’t felt that reaction to anything in such a long time that it seemed almost wrong. Guilt washed over him suddenly, reminding Haru of his broken promise to Makoto and his shameful, flakey behavior towards Nagisa and Rei. He hadn’t allowed them to be there for him, despite their initial and earnest attempts at the beginning. If anyone was responsible for the dissolution of their friendships, it was him. Silently gauging all three of their reactions, time moved at a crawl before Tobi spoke up again.

“Nanase-senpai! Let me take your jacket for you. Do you need time to stretch or get ready?” To this, Haruka simply shook his head. He pulled goggles and a swim cap out of the pockets of his jacket before shedding it and handing it to Tobi for safe keeping. He knew the starstruck teen was more than happy to hold onto it. With visual access to the rest of his body, Haru was all too familiar with people unabashedly taking in his appearance; thankfully his friends lacked any amorous intent in their gazes as they looked him up and down.

No. Instead what was reflected in their eyes were raw emotions that Haru couldn’t quite pin. There was pain and regret first and foremost; those were quite easy to recognize. But whatever else the three others were feeling eluded Haru’s understanding. Thankfully they didn’t have time to hash everything out in that very public place. Tobi was shouting to get everyone’s attention, announcing the start of the medley relay. Thank God for the effective distraction from their pesky emotions.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“The results of the medley relay times are as follows!” Tobi spoke into a megaphone as he stood on one of the starting platforms, a good head over everyone else gathered round to listen. He regarded his phone to read off the times. The four swimmers were standing near the clubhouse where there was enough space for most everyone in attendance to congregate, and their hair was drenched in fresh water after having rinsed off the chlorine chemicals under the outdoor showers located to the side of the pool. They all wore the iconic Iwatobi Swim Club jackets as well. Everyone was eager to know if the founding members still stacked up to their former selves and waited on baited breath for Tobi to go on. Rin stood next to Makoto, arms crossed over his beefy chest as he tried to keep his eyes off Haru’s lovely profile. There’d been a moment where their eyes met, and sparks erupted under Rin’s skin in a lingering sensation that still hadn’t faded away yet.

“Tachibana-senpai beat his best recorded time by point-eight-three seconds.” Makoto’s success was met with glad applause and he smiled that lazy grin of his. Rin clapped the back of his strong neck as a show of congratulations and pride, jostling the tall man and knocking a laugh out of him. Haru bit the inside of his cheek to stop a jealous sneer from appearing on his face.

“Ryugazaki-senpai fell short of his best time by one-point-seven-three seconds.” There was less applause this time and Rei could be seen adjusting his glasses with a strained look on his long face. Beside him, Nagisa smiled reassuringly and rubbed his arm supportively.

“Hazuki-senpai missed his best recorded time by point-zero-nine seconds.” Now it was time for Rei to comfort Nagisa, who kicked the ground and crossed his arms in frustration. There was scattered laughter, though it wasn’t malicious or meant to embarrass Nagisa; he was just undeniably cute in that moment.

“Nanase-senpai beat his best recorded time by two-point-three seconds!” At this, everyone broke out in raucous applause, so impressed with Haru’s ability and that he’d only improved in the years since swimming for Iwatobi High School. People flocked to pat him on the shoulder and back, smiling and surrounding him like an undulating sea of creepy kabuki masks. Haru swallowed his nerves, but the cinching of his eyebrows and downturn of his delicate lips did not go unseen by the few who knew him best. Makoto knew that Haru wasn’t comfortable with so much attention or physical contact and stepped forward to attempt putting some distance between him and the over-eager fans.

“Back up!” A deep, masculine voice rang out loud and clear over the rest of the noise, silencing everything instantly.

The biggest, brawniest hunk of a man Makoto had ever seen in his life was cutting through the crowd, unapologetic as he nudged and pushed people out of the way with his imposing frame. This man had beautiful tawny skin and a tall frame that begged to be climbed like a tree. His teal eyes, which had a slight droop to them and caused him to have that dreamy, bedroom gaze, stood out in beautiful contrast against dark brown hair that was cut short, but styled into perfect messiness with gel. As he got closer and turned his head to look at Haru, Makoto noticed the undercut at the back of the man’s head where the prickly hairs begged to be scratched under curious nails. His masculine face was built with severe bone-structure that created beautiful angles that looked sculpted by an artist. That mouth, so wide and turned down at the corners, most certainly could shift into a dazzling smile that Makoto readily imagined would only add to the man’s handsome visage. His gay heart fluttered as a seed of attraction was planted firmly in the back of his mind.

As the people stepped out of the way to give the determined fellow a wide berth, his well put-together outfit came into view and Makoto gave him an approving once-over. There was an open charcoal colored vest layered over a white, v-neck long sleeved cotton shirt, the ends of which were bunched up just under his elbows to show off powerful forearms. A pair of well fitting sage green slacks hung low on his narrow hips, secured with a brown leather belt that peaked from beneath the white shirt. It made his torso look impossibly long and lean. The fabric of his pants stretched nicely over his crotch and hard thighs, but bunched around the tops of his tall army camo boots. There was a chord of thin leather hanging around his thick neck, and dangling just over his breastbone was what appeared to be a shotgun shell. Clutched in his powerful hands on either side of him was a towel and Haru’s shoes that he’d slipped off just before the start of the medley.

When the mysterious stranger finally closed in on the foursome, his brooding gaze locked on Haru and the four others all wondered the same thing.

‘Is this Haru’s boyfriend?’ Was the common thread of their thought processes. Rin even shared the same sentiment as he quietly observed the scene playing out before them like something out of a J-drama.

“Sousuke,” Haru uttered plainly, looking wholly unaffected by the bear of a man. Makoto, Nagisa, Rei, and Rin all cut their eyes over to the dark-haired beauty, studying how Haru regarded this ‘Sousuke’ person. Once the threat of Haru being overwhelmed by the crowd faded, Sousuke relaxed and simply handed him his shoes before pulling the dark blue towel over Haru’s drenched head.

“Good swimming,” Was all Sousuke had to say now, and he then took a moment to glance at Haru’s friends. “All of you.” Each of them met his intense eyes, but he seemed to hold Makoto’s gaze longer than the rest. It brought a flush to Makoto’s tanned cheeks that he tried to hide by looking away. “Please, continue.” Sousuke directed to Tobi Yamogata, who looked fear-struck by the intimidating man.

“Y-yeah! The pool is now open for those who wish to swim, and there’s plenty of food left if you’re still hungry. We have the pool for another hour, so please enjoy yourselves.” Tobi quickly recovered as he spoke clearly into the megaphone, hoping to get the atmosphere back to something lighthearted and fun. People began to disperse as some went over to the food table and others dove into the pristine pool to have their turn at swimming. Tobi turned around to face the founding members, still standing on the starting platform. “Get close so I can take your picture! This’ll go in the display case inside the clubhouse. Right next to your other one!”

Without hesitation, Nagisa jumped energetically before pulling the others in tighter. He hooked his nimble arm in Makoto’s elbow, then reached behind Rei for Haru’s forearm to draw him in closer. The air of awkwardness and unfamiliarity that initially hung over the four evaporated, if for even just a minute, as they huddled together for Tobi to snap a few pictures of them with his phone. Haru hesitated before finally bringing his hand to rest between Rei’s shoulder blades, leaning in with an odd shift of his weight as they held a group pose for a few seconds. It was as if Haru’s body had forgotten how to position itself in pictures that weren’t overtly sexual in nature. Their smiling faces beamed proudly, and even Haruka’s face had a pleased expression playing at the corners of his lips. It was subtle, like everything else about him, but nonetheless still evident.

As Nagisa chattered on and on to the other three, Sousuke watched over them like a hawk, lost in his own mind with feelings of pride and admiration for Haru’s efforts that day. This was a big step outside of his limited comfort range, and so far it had paid off in spades if the contented look on the young man’s face was any indication. Not too far off to the other side, Rin also looked on with a pleased smile at seeing Makoto finally enjoying himself in Haru’s presence. His focus then shifted to the tall, dark figure hovering nearby like a silent protector.

’Cop lookin’ motherfucker.’ Rin cursed to himself with a crooked frown, deciding that he didn’t like the energy that passed between Haru and Sousuke. He’d reserved final judgment until the nature of their relationship was made clear, but something in the older man’s stern gaze gave the redhead pause. Sidling up next to him, Rin tried his best to play it cool as he finally broke the ice with Sousuke.

“So, you and Haruka?” He asked boldly, not one for beating around the bush. It drew Sousuke’s stormy gaze momentarily away from Haruka, but there wasn’t any other reaction for Rin to read.

“We’re not involved. I’m here as a friend.” He clarified, though it was so vague that Rin still had plenty of questions to follow up with. Hiding his relief, he returned his ruby eyes to the four swimmers and nodded absentmindedly, playing it cool before the aloof man.

“That’s cool. Same with Makoto, for me. We’ve been roommates since freshman year and I’m moving down here with him next week. It’s been great getting to know this place and Makoto’s friends.” This revelation did catch Sousuke’s attention though, and Rin adjusted the black baseball cap on his head, a nervous gesture to busy his hands with.

The conversation died with that comment, so Rin stopped trying to pry anything out of the stoic guy. He saw that Makoto and Haru were finally getting a chance to talk, offering an opportunity for them to be officially introduced. Haru had only thus far exchanged short, superficial responses to Makoto’s safe questions when Rin stepped up next to the taller man with his boyish, toothy grin curling attractively on his face. Surprise quickly seeped into apprehension when Haru noticed how friendly the two interacted with each other. The unique looking guy that’d caught his eye earlier was intimately familiar with Makoto?

“Haru-chan, this is Rin Matsuoka. We were roommates at University and he’s gonna room with me when I move back here in a week. Rin, this is Haruka Nanase…My best friend.” Makoto’s gentle voice had a slightly anxious edge to it. Like ice water trickling down his spine, Haru felt the coldness creeping into the back of his mind as he looked between Makoto and Rin. It was like worlds colliding, a clashing of two personalities that each held a special place in Makoto’s heart. Nagisa and Rei stood just to the side, watching like enraptured spectators of some great battle that was about to commence. Rin, for his part, was the picture of cordialness as he smiled cheekily at Haruka.

“Good to meet you, Haruka!” Rin held out a closed fist towards Haru in an offer of good intentions. “Makoto talks about you so much, I feel like I already know you. Ha!” A beat passed where Rin’s clenched hand remained hanging between himself and Haru in anticipation of the other copying the gesture. That friendliness was not reciprocated though, and any warmth in Haru’s countenance quickly vanished behind his default mask of apathy.

Sousuke noticed the shift before anyone else. He saw the way Haru bristled and pursed his lips ever so slightly. The oblivious redhead had no clue about the vitriol and resentment Haru had been harboring towards him for years; though this was the first time that a face had been paired with the name. Rin represented the missed opportunities and happiness that had once been within Haru’s grasp, to only be heartbreakingly dashed. Frowning pointedly, Haru turned his face away and shoved his hands into his jacket pockets, fingering the silicone straps of his goggles angrily.

“I’m leaving now. It was nice seeing you all again.” Abrupt and so severe was the shift in Haru’s attitude that it left the others reeling. Rin’s smile faltered and he pulled his hand back in a dejected motion. He spoke so robotically and in such a detached voice, it felt like this was some kind of final goodbye between acquaintances and not the reunion of old friends. Nagisa feared this would be the case and he needily grasped Rei’s hand between their bodies. Rei gave his smaller hand a squeeze, watching as Makoto’s face crumbled into a crestfallen expression at Haru’s blatant rejection.

None of them had retained the ability to read beyond Haru’s protective mask, and for that he was grateful. Haru wanted to keep his turbulent emotions well hidden from them. What was the point of risking the inevitable heartbreak by getting emotionally vulnerable with people who would be out of his life again in no time? The fact that Makoto and Rin were relocating to Iwatobi hadn’t truly registered in Haru’s mind yet. They were bound to run into each other around town, making it nearly impossible going forward to keep them further than arm’s length away.

Nearing the end of his patience for social interaction, Haru glanced at Sousuke to indicate it was time for them to leave. The four others watched with mixed negative reactions as their withdrawn friend turned to make his departure, and it dawned on them that this was their last chance to grasp at any remaining hope for reconciliation. Nagisa was the first to pull himself together enough to grab Haru’s attention again by reaching out for his thin wrist, stopping him in his tracks. Haruka shifted his weight and looked back at his tiny blonde companion.

“Haru-chan! You sound like this is the last time we’ll see each other.” His pale, magenta eyes glistened brightly with unshed tears as he grasped Haru’s hand in a trembling hold. “Rei and I are only here for a week and we really wanted to hang out with you. We missed you so much! Did you miss us?” Such earnestness was difficult to callously deflect, even for Haru who’d always had a soft spot for little Nagisa. His cold mask was beginning to crack.

“Let’s have dinner tonight! I saw an outdoor ramen bar on my way here and I really want to try it with you guys. Please, Haru-chan? Say you’ll meet us there.” The begging proved effective, just as it had been in their youth. When Haru didn’t automatically turn down the invitation, Makoto sensed a break in his resolve and swooped in to offer Nagisa some reinforcements.

“It’d mean the world if you came, Haru-chan. We’ve all missed you. Alot.” He said in a sincere voice, smiling through the pain of seeing his best friend being so reserved with them. Haru averted his eyes as if considering the idea, but didn’t pull away from Nagisa. A bell went off in the very recesses of Makoto’s mind as he remembered an old trick that used to work on Haru every time. “I bet they serve mackerel there~” A familiar spark glimmered in Haru’s bright blue eyes, and instantly Makoto knew his ploy worked. Rei and Nagisa remembered how much Haru’s cravings for the fish ruled his decisions, and they hid sly grins as best they could. Rin just watched in apt curiosity.

Haru pivoted to face Sousuke now, his arm pulled straight since his wrist was still in Nagisa’s grasp. There was a questioning expression on his face now, and a dash of trepidation mixed in as he wordlessly asked if his schedule would allow for it. The rest then turned their attention to him as well, but their faces only showed non-verbal begging for Haru to come and play. With a short exhale, Sousuke shrugged his acquiescence. How was he expected to deny them when they all turned such effective weapons against him?

“So long as you’re back home by eight, s’fine with me.” It’d be a lie to say Sousuke didn’t get some sense of satisfaction in watching Haru’s friend Nagisa jump forward to embrace him again, the rest also acting as giddy as school kids over him being allowed to hang out some more. Was this what it felt like to be an obliging, doting big brother? It was possibly the most wholesome moment of Sousuke’s life in the past ten years.

Despite Haru’s best attempts at maintaining an aloof persona, the cautious joy dancing in the back of his expressive eyes was plain as day. He agreed to meet the others at the ‘Umai Umai Ramen Bar’ around five o’clock, giving them all plenty of time to go home and change beforehand. As Haru and Sousuke made their exit, not ones to hang around beyond what was necessary, they heard Nagisa shouting a fond goodbye and the assurance they’d see him again soon. It was a familiar sentiment that struck Haru somewhat bittersweetly; Nagisa had said the same thing the last time they hung out four years ago…only for it to be actually be a lie. He hoped this wouldn’t be a repeat of that. His heart couldn’t take another devastating disappointment.

“We did it! Haru-chan agreed to come back out with us! He’ll be back to his old self in no time!” Nagisa celebrated their small victory, seemingly oblivious to the uphill battle that goal still posed. Makoto allowed himself to hope that this was a step in the right direction of rekindling his friendship with Haru. But even if there were setbacks, he was filled with a righteous sense of determination to stay at Haruka’s side; through thick and thin as once before.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Backyard looks bigger than the pictures. I could totally put a grill out here!” Rin said in a slightly raised voice as he peered over the top of a locked wooden fence gate. A few feet away, Makoto was investigating the state of the house’s exterior for any faults that may not have shown up in the online gallery the rental website had provided. From their brief superficial observations, everything seemed in order about the rent house they were scheduled to move into the following week. They didn’t have the keys yet, but since all the papers were signed already, there wasn’t any harm in finally checking it out for themselves in person.

In an awesome twist of fate, the house was located in the same neighborhood as Makoto’s childhood home; same neighborhood as Haru’s house too. It was maybe a fifteen-minute walk (or ten-minute jog in a pinch) and constructed in the same style as Makoto’s parent’s house. It was a two-story, two bedroom structure with an L-shaped backyard. The interior had been upgraded a few years ago with new paint, refinished hardwood floors, and modern appliances and utilities.

Unlike Haru’s more traditional house, with its tatami mat covered living room/dining area that could be expanded in size by simply opening a shoji screen door, this house had a completely separated den and dining room. There were still traces of conventional Japanese design elements remaining, namely that most of the doors functioned by sliding rather than swinging open. All in all, it was a great bachelor pad for a couple of single guys looking to transition from college students to functional adults. That was the idea, at least.

By four-thirty, Rin and Makoto were standing under the metal and plexiglass awning of a road-side bus stop, waiting for the next one to come by and take them towards the more urban side of Iwatobi; if it could even be called that. Compared to Kyoto, Osaka, and Tokyo, Iwatobi was veritably rural. However, for those who craved a slower lifestyle, this place was paradise.

While Rin was still dressed in the same clothes, Makoto had taken the opportunity to change into a different outfit before they left the pool. His Nike bag and other belongings had been dropped off at his parent’s house on their way to visit the rent house. Makoto was dressed casually in a pair of dark denim pants that, while tight around his hips, were stylishly baggy with the legs cuffed a few inches above his ankles. He wore a hunter green button-up over a plain white t-shirt. His shoes were a plain pair of mustard yellow slip-on Vans, perfectly completing the low-key look he was going for.

“So, you ever gonna ask Haruka if we can crash at his place? Getting a little late to find a hotel room.” Rin inquired just to make conversation. He knew Makoto was nervous to ask Haru for such a favor, even though it was a relatively small one.

“I-I just haven’t had a good chance to bring it up yet! I’ll definitely ask him though!” Makoto sounded flustered and a little defensive, but that just made Rin snigger.

“You’ve told me how generous and chill Haru was growing up. Any reason to think that part of him has changed?” The question had Makoto considering it for a moment, and then a bus appeared from around the bend in the road. He and Rin stepped closer to the curb in preparation of boarding the large transportation vehicle.

“I honestly don’t know. His life is a mystery to me.” Makoto answered finally, sounding introspective. The two of them paid the bus fare and took the first available seats that were next to each other. There were a few others already boarded, each lost in their own worlds as the bus lurched forward. “But I really hope he’s not changed that much.” Rin glanced at his friend, refraining from commenting, but took note of the concern etched in Makoto’s face. Each small bump and irregularity in the street caused the bus to jump and jostle its passengers as it drove towards the next stop. The two friends stayed quiet the rest of the way, each busy with his own thoughts.

Thirty minutes and a few bus stops later, Rin and Makoto were walking down the active downtown streets of Iwatobi. The stores and restaurants were varied, offering a plethora of choices to keep oneself busy and entertained on a Saturday night. One thoroughfare was well known for being a hub of delicious street food, with stalls and outdoor bars lining the road that served a diversity of delicacies. The air smelled incredibly savory thanks to the steam and smoke being generated by all the grills and sizzling stir fry pans, triggering Rin’s notorious appetite immediately.

The two quickly spotted the Umai Umai Ramen Bar, a typical hole-in-the-wall style place where the food was prepared by a singular grizzled old man in a tiny makeshift kitchen behind a tall counter. There were a few wooden stools placed at the counter, offering a place for patrons to sit and enjoy their food. There happened to be five such seats available, three already taken by Nagisa, Rie, and Haru. They each had a can of Sapporo Premium beer in front of them, and two cans placed where Makoto and Rin would be taking their seats. As they approached, Makoto curiously looked around the area for sight of Haru’s good-looking friend, but saw no sign of him lingering nearby.

Rin’s sharp ruby eyes zeroed in on Haru’s appearance first. The dark-haired beauty wore a black drawstring hoodie that looked about three-times too big for his lithe body. The arms were bunched up to his elbows and the fabric pooled in his lap attractively. The brand wasn’t immediately recognizable to Rin, but the rest of the boys instantly knew it was a Yohji Yamamoto hoodie thanks to the high quality material and style. He wore a pair of black chino-style pants that bunched at his thin ankles, meeting the tops of his white Adidas sneakers. At first glance, his outfit looked casual and almost unkempt, but closer inspection called attention to the high-end brands and understated vibe that seemed to be Haru’s trademark look now.

Sitting on Haru’s other side, Nagisa and Rei were also changed into new clothes that spoke to their different tastes - though they still looked really good next to each other. Nagisa was dressed similarly to Haru, though his oversized hoodie was pastel blue and the sleeves had been cleanly cut at the shoulders, exposing his toned sides since the armholes were so big. He wore a pair of white cotton shorts that ended just above his knees, and on his feet were a pair of solid black puma high-top sneakers. His unruly blonde locks were pulled back by a thin elastic hair band that caused the ends to splay out dramatically. It allowed for his pretty, yet boyish, visage to be seen unhindered.

At the end of the counter, Rei sat there looking a little more dressed up than the other two in his light gray slacks that had obviously been tailored to fit his lean frame perfectly. The legs were hemmed a few inches above his ankles, and on his feet were a pair of navy blue suede boat shoes that offered a splash of color to his otherwise simplistic look. He had on a white t-shirt underneath a lightweight sports coat made of the same material as his pants. There was the flash of a nice watch on his slim wrist when he absentmindedly scratched his neck as Nagisa talked Haru’s ear off.

The conversation they entered into was the tale-end of Nagisa sharing how his and Rei’s lives were going in Tokyo. Rin and Makoto had already gotten that particular update, so they were happy to just take their seats at the wooden counter with Makoto next to Haru and Rin on the outside. Haru glanced at them in acknowledgment, while Rei leaned back far enough to shoot the two late-comers a friendly smile, and turned back to listen to Nagisa describing his life as a self-employed artist and content creator.

Nagisa worked mostly with resin, creating adorable keychains and other useful trinkets that people apparently ate up since his online store was almost always out of stock. He also spent time on social media sites like instagram and tiktok, participating in viral trends and sharing his life with the world like it was an open book. Though it didn’t generate income directly, he had a pretty impressive following that seemed to love anything he bothered to post. Rei earned more than enough at his 9-to-5 job to support their comfortable lifestyle, and Nagisa played his role as the happy-homemaker that evened out the balance of their relationship. They lived in domestic bliss that made the other’s somewhat jealous.

“Now that we’re all here, let's take a picture!” Nagisa’s bubbly voice commanded with a smile, and soon all five young men were leaning in tight so Rei could get a decent picture with the help of his long arm holding the phone aloft. Haru felt a weird rush of emotion when he was sandwiched between Makoto and Nagisa, having to remind himself to throw up a lazy peace sign instead of smiling at the camera like the rest did. A memory flashes inside his mind’s eye, recalling all the other past times they’d gathered to take selfies together.

It was a nice trip down memory lane, but was over and done within just a few seconds. They returned to more comfortable seated positions and Rei handed Nagisa’s phone back to him so he could approve of the pictures taken, expertly selecting the best one and editing it with filters and emojis until it met his high standards. In the meantime, the rest looked up at the banner hanging on the back wall behind the stovetop that the chef was standing by. It was a visual menu that displayed some of the more popular items, and it all looked mouth-wateringly delicious. In the next moment, the cook was leaning on his elbows against the counter, obviously ready for the group to order their food.

“Katsudon for me!” Nagisa exclaimed with a sure tone, followed by Haru’s more mellow voice as he ordered a bowl of Miso soup with a side dish of grilled mackerel. “Should have known you’d get that, Haru-chan~” The chipper man teased well-meaningly. Haruka simply nodded, and Rin quietly observed him from around Makoto’s larger form.

“I’ll take Katsudon as well, please.” Makoto smiled at the old man, nodding to himself in approval of his choice. The cook responded to each of them by repeating their orders as a confirmation of their final decisions. At the end of the row, Rei rubbed his sharp chin in deep consideration of his order. However, he spoke out-loud the things that were running through his head.

“I’m thinking the seafood hot pot or Katsudon with ankake sauce. Hm…or maybe the chilled pork cutlet udon.” It was just his usual indecisive rambling that Nagisa had come to expect, but the proprietor took as his order and repeated back the three dishes to Rei. The others watched him become instantly flustered as he tried to correct the older man in as respectful a manner as possible. “N-No sir! You’ve got it wrong! I wasn’t placing my order!” Rei’s expression was exasperated as he sat forward and reached out to the cook in an attempt to grab his attention, which was already turned to the kitchen behind him as he began preparing the food.

Next to him, Nagisa guffawed in unbridled amusement at his lover’s blunder, his small palm slapping the smooth wooden counter as his laughter caught a few passerby’s attention. It was Haru’s reaction that was the most surprising though; even if it was only Makoto who recognized the significance of it. The two of them hunched over slightly to hide their sniggering at Rei’s expense, with Haru twisting at the waist so that his smiling face could only be seen by the one person he’d ever felt truly safe with; Makoto.

He wasn’t someone who freely laughed or expressed intense emotions for everyone to see. Only Makoto Tachibana had the honor of such miraculous sights. At least that’s how it’d been up until their separation over four years ago. The swallowed laughter and tell-tale shaking of his shoulders were what gave away Haru’s mirth, and it struck Makoto just how great it felt to share a moment like that with him again.

’Just like old times.’ He thought to himself, lost in the moment of watching Haru scrub away the smile from his lips to return to a default expression of apathy. However, a strange sound on his other side pulled Makoto’s attention away from Haruka. Rin was leaned over the counter with an unobstructed view of Haru’s secretive reaction, and there was a look of astonishment on his surprisingly flushed face.

He’d been privy to the slip up in Haru’s cool mask of indifference, and saw what previously only Makoto had the privilege of witnessing. Left speechless, Rin could only stare with his mouth agape and eyes wide as Haru simply resumed sipping his beer as if nothing had happened. It only lasted a second or two, but it was enough time for Rin’s heart to skip a beat. He quickly recovered though and shook his head free of intrusive thoughts about Haru’s beautiful smile. Makoto wasn’t sure how he felt about his newest friend’s obvious attraction to his oldest companion, but wisely kept his thoughts to himself for the sake of preserving the fun and carefree atmosphere.

“Rei, don’t sweat it. I’ll help you eat it all, no problem.” Rin offered reassuringly, and smiled at Rei’s abundant gratitude. He effortlessly cracked open the cold beer in front of him with just the use of his forefinger, then lazily brought the can to his mouth to sample the rich alcohol. Makoto followed suit, then initiated a friendly toast by holding his beer out before them that ended with everyone clinking their cans together as they joined in a resounding outcry of ‘kanpai!’.

“Haru-chan, you should come visit us in Tokyo sometime! I’ll show you some really cool places and we can even go swimming at this big gym that Rei and I are members at.” Nagisa leaned in close to his friend, big eyes imploring for Haru to engage with him more. Haru simply kept his blue eyes cast forward as he finished off his first beer.

“Maybe. I’m in Tokyo a few times a month, actually.” He informed casually, drawing a curious reaction from Rei and Nagisa. It was about a two-hour flight from Tokyo to the small airport nearest to Iwatobi, not a cheap excursion by any means. Little did they know he only ever flew by his uncle’s small private jet and not commercially.

“Really? What for? How come you never let us know you’ve been in town? We could have been hanging out all this time!” Nagisa’s soft voice was tinged with a whine that made Rei put a warning hand on the blonde’s knee. That was edging close to shaming or guilting Haru, which was counterproductive to their ultimate goal of rekindling a deep friendship with him. They all watched as Haru ordered another beer, blank face belying the thoughts running rampant in his mind.

“Work. The company I work for flies me up sometimes for…meetings.” It was the best he could come up with on the fly like that. Haru hadn’t considered what excuse to concoct that would convince his friends that he lived a normal life. Why hadn’t he and Sousuke figured out some cover story that would keep his friends from getting curious about his day-to-day dealings? A panic started to prickle at the back of Haru’s mind and he took a long drink from his second beer. Hopefully it would take the edge off his nerves.

“What line of work are you in, Haruka-senpai? What’s the company you work for?” Rei asked in a curious, yet analytical voice. Behind the counter, their food was being prepared and Haru could only hope it would be ready soon so they could eat and stop digging for information.

“I do data entry for a company that specializes in…data.” That was so vague and unconvincing that Haru instantly wanted to die of cringe. He refused to look at his friend’s reactions, which were varying degrees of confusion and skepticism. When none of them commented, Haruka felt compelled to further clarify and fill the awkward silence. “It's a new company…still pretty small so you wouldn’t know the name. I get to work from home. But when they have big meetings, they fly me out for a few days.” Surely they could see through the lies and knew Haru was lying through his teeth? Mercifully, a distraction came in the form of Nagisa noticing something and radically changing the subject.

“Haru-chan! You’ve got pierced ears too? I had no idea you were so edgy!” Every set of eyes quickly honed-in on Haru’s ears, which were nearly concealed by his sleek black hair that tapered towards the back of his neck. True to Nagisa’s words, there were in fact silver studs pierced through his soft lobes, so simple and understated that they could easily go unnoticed. Rin found himself trying to stave off a blush by guzzling the rest of his beer and requesting another from the cook. Nagisa turned his head so that Haru could see the multiple piercings in his right ear, the most prominent being an industrial bar.

“Check mine out! You like?” Haru peered at Nagisa’s flashy piercings, then nodded affirmatively. The others took a moment to appraise Nagisa’s eye-catching piercings, Rei doing a poor job of hiding an amorous grin. He had a bit of a piercing kink that Nagisa thankfully shared. His were located in more private, intimate areas though. “When’d you get your nipple pierced? It looks really good on you.”

Haru shrugged as a non-answer, not keen on revealing too much more about himself than what had already been shared. There was a gruff voice before them announcing that the two Katsudon bowls were ready, and the delectable food was placed before Nagisa and Makoto. Everyone was suddenly reminded how famished they were once such appetizing food was sitting in front of them. Haru’s simplistic Miso soup with grilled mackerel was the next dish set forth, followed by the three servings of food that Rei had inadvertently ordered. He took the Katsudon bowl and gladly gave the seafood hot pot and udon dish to Rin at the end of the counter. With everyone finally served, they readied their chopsticks and spoons and each let out the customary ‘itadakimasu’ before diving in for their first bites.

A companionable silence settled over the five young men as they enjoyed their well-deserved meals. Their chewing and slurping was only ever interrupted by taking a sip of their beers or mumbling the cook’s praise under their breaths. Haru was grateful for the break in their questions and he delicately picked at the flakey fish between spoonfuls of hot broth. From down the counter, red eyes snuck glances his way.

’Why is it so fucking cute even when he eats?’ Rin asked himself as he aggressively shoveled slippery udon noodles into his mouth. Next to him, Makoto was lost in his own thoughts as he patiently went about enjoying the crispy Katsudon. Once everyone was more or less halfway through their respective meals, they all seemed to slow down and a dreaded conversation was finally brought up. The time was nearing six o’clock and as the Sun began its descent, everything was cast in an orange glow.

“Haru-chan,” Nagisa’s voice was oddly absent of its usual energy. Everyone turned to look at the downcast blonde, who was having a difficult time finding and holding Haruka’s unwavering gaze. “I’m so sorry that Rei and I stopped trying to be good friends to you. After graduation, everything got so busy and we just sort of let things fizzle out.” No one moved as Nagisa kept speaking, struck silent by the vulnerability on display. “Neither of us knew how to be what you needed the most, and it was just easier to move away and start the next part of our lives together. I’m so sorry we left you here alone and I really hope we can all be close again. Like the way we were in high school.”

Haru blinked and watched as Rei reached forward to hold Nagisa’s trembling hand in a show of support. The two of them shared a look that had Rei nodding in agreement with his boyfriend, a contrite expression on his long face. Before he could respond, there was a warm touch to Haru’s shoulder that made him turn in his seat to face Makoto.

“I’m sorry too, Haru-chan. There’s no excuse for me going so quiet on you. You’ve been my best friend since kindergarten and deserved so much better than how we treated you. I’d love it if we could go back to being that close again, but understand if you need space or don’t want to.” There was a telltale wavering in Makoto’s rich voice that tugged on Haru’s own heartstrings, though his face remained largely unaffected. “I’m moving back to Iwatobi in a week. The house we’re renting is in our neighborhood, like ten minutes away from your place. I’m back, for good Haru. All I want is to be there for you. To be your friend again in any way you’ll let me. And if you’re cool with it, Rin could be another person you consider a friend. I have no idea what your life is like now or how different you are from four years ago, but nothing could make me not want to be friends with you.”

By that point, Makoto was just rambling each thought that happened to come to mind. It all circled back to the same thing though; he wanted to be friends again. They all did. Haru swallowed the dryness in his mouth and pulled his arms close to his body, feeling the need to minimize himself and hide away in the billowy fabric of his hoodie. These were the exact words he’d been desperate to hear years ago, before his life had spiraled out of control.

Haru tucked his chin down as he stared hard at the clasped hands in his lap. The dark truth of his existence would certainly turn them away if they knew. Who would willingly choose to befriend someone with an abhorrent affection for their rapist uncle and worked as a camboy and prostitute? Who in their right mind or good conscience would subject others to the turmoil of being close to someone like that? When he considered the pros and cons of rekindling the treasured friendships being offered so freely, Haru found it nearly impossible to stick to his guns about keeping them all at a distance. This whole thing was supposed to be a one-off event in his monotonous life; a chance to see how the old gang was fairing in their new lives - not the catastrophic change it was quickly becoming. If he reopened the door to these relationships, it’d certainly draw out Jiro’s jealousy and controlling ways. There was no telling how it’d affect his ability or willingness to continue with ‘work’ and his lifestyle in general. Everything was screaming at Haru to reject them outright and shut down any notions of friendship then and there.

But then he looked back up and saw the earnest hope etched in each of their faces and all that reasoning instantly deflated. How was he expected to deny them something so pure as companionship? Maybe it would be okay? If he could keep his friendships separated from his work, then they’d be none the wiser of how truly fucked up Haru’s life was. He could be the person they remembered and still held in high regard. He wanted to be that person again, even if it was a lie.

“I’m sorry for making it so hard to be my friend…” He finally replied, voice even but halting as the words slowly came to him. “I don’t know how good I’ll be at it, but I can try to be friends with you guys again. Like old times.” It was the most honest and vulnerable Haru had been in years. Historically, he avoided even acknowledging to himself his guilt and shame that revolved around Makoto, Nagisa, and Rei. It was too hard to admit that he was at partial fault for ending their friendship. With a red face and heartbeat thundering in his ears, Haru finally musters the courage to look up at his friend’s faces, not sure what to expect.

They were all smiling back at him, looking so relieved to have the burden of guilt somewhat lifted by Haru’s forgiveness and acceptance. There was still a lot of baggage to be unpack that couldn’t be fixed in the span of a single meal, but this was a great first step in that direction. Makoto blinked his eyes to force back the tears that wanted to spill free, but Nagisa had no qualms with openly displaying his emotions in front of them. The blonde wrapped his nimble arms around Haru’s shoulders and wept his gratitude and joy for all to hear, while Rei calmly rubbed his boyfriend’s back.

At Haruka’s other side, Rin clapped Makoto’s shoulder in a gesture of encouragement and pride in his friend. He knew how difficult it’d been for him to expose his feelings like that. Thankfully, Haruka Nanase proved to have a gracious spirit when it came time to absolve his old friends of their pent up shame and guilt. His first impression of Haru had been one of coldness and arrogance, all wrapped up in a sinfully beautiful ribbon. But even though Haru’s reactions were withdrawn and tampered down, small cracks in his resolve showed the truth of his generous and humble nature. Rin’s infatuation was only fanned by the revelation. He wanted to become familiar with every facet of Haru’s personality, to hopefully be counted in the ranks of his friends - and maybe something more significant further down the road.

The next two hours went by in a flash. Once the cloud of awkwardness caused by their confessions and reconciliation had lifted, it left the five young men free to just enjoy hanging out and chatting like it was routine. They were all a few beers in by the time seven o’clock rolled around, and Haru finally felt at ease amongst the others. There was a subtle grin tugging at one corner of his mouth that kept resurfacing each time one of them said or did something amusing.

It was the most expressive he’d been in years, and that was how Sousuke found him as he casually approached the group. He was there as the damp blanket on a good time, the pooper of the party, and it absolutely tore at him to interrupt them. But if there was anything more important than ensuring Haru’s happiness and comfort, it was keeping Jiro Nanase appeased and largely uninvolved in their lives. The less waves they caused, the better it would be for Haruka.

Sousuke recognized that this was the start of something big and unavoidable in Haru’s life. While he was proud of him for risking severe emotional turmoil in order to re-forge connections with his friends again, only proving just how resilient he really was, there was a nagging concern that this would all blow up in their faces. The nature of Haru’s work and personal life didn’t lend itself to being open and honest with the rest of the world, especially those who he considered important to him. It would be the ultimate balancing act for Haru to keep the others unaware of his activities. And on the inevitable day when it would all come tumbling down, Sousuke vowed to be there to catch Haru before the moment of impact. He would do his damnedest to soften the blow as much as possible. For now, he allowed his charge to finally find comfort and joy in something that wasn’t sullied by his uncle’s influence.

“Haru,” A low voice broke through the mirthful conversation happening at the quaint food stall, drawing four sets of eyes Sousuke’s way. Haru remained impassive as he sipped the last of his broth, not bothering to turn around to confirm his handler’s arrival. Makoto felt his ears heat up at the sight of Haru’s ‘friend’ looking so intimidating and handsome in his dark clothes. Rin pursed his lips in derision, already knowing that Sousuke was there to take Haru away. “It’s time I took you home.”

Without complaint, Haru robotically pulled a slim wallet from the confines of the pocket in his hoodie. He easily slid a black card from its tight slot and reached forward to give it to the proprietor to pay for his meal. The others watched with disheartened looks on their faces, wishing Haru would put up some kind of fight or indicate that he didn’t want to leave. Once the card was back in his possession, Haru stood up from his tall seat and gave a respectful nod to the cook before turning to face Sousuke. It seemed like he was about to leave without so much as a proper goodbye! Sensing the opportunity was rapidly disappearing, Makoto grasped Haru’s sleeve to get his attention.

“Haru, I wanted to ask you sooner but couldn’t find the right time.” He started with a sheepish tone, and Rin instantly knew what Makoto was doing. He leaned forward to watch Haru’s reaction, mentally crossing his fingers for luck. “Rin and I need a place to crash tonight and I really don’t want to impose on my family. Can we stay with you til we can get a hotel room? I’m so sorry for the last min-”

“No.”

Makoto’s words were cut short by Haru’s firm, unapologetic refusal. It was abrupt and went completely against the grain of everyone’s memory of him being so generous and casual about others staying over during their time in high school. Makoto hadn’t considered that Haru would actually say no, and was lost for what to say. Nagisa and Rei looked between the two of them, while Rin fixed a perturbed expression on his tanned face. His opinion of Haruka Nanase kept shifting between ‘he’s an angel’ to ‘what an asshole’.

“Why not?” He barked snarkily, getting a look from Makoto that implored Rin to let it go. Sensing the tension hanging over them, Haru finally offered a half-hearted explanation as he pulled his arm free of Makoto’s loose grip. Sousuke looked on from his spot a few feet away, arms folded over his jacked chest as he watched Haru think on the fly; not his biggest strength by any means.

“My place is a mess and not ready for guests.” If Haru’s voice had a more emotional quality to it, the others would have been able to tell he was lying. Thankfully, being monotonous and aloof made it easier to fool people. Unable to bring himself to face his friend’s certain disappointment, Haru kept his back turned to them as he bid a final goodbye. “I’ll see you guys around. We’ll figure out a time to hang out again before you leave.” It was a rather non-committal and vague sentiment, but that was the best Haru could muster. There was just too much emotional baggage for him to readily trust his friends would follow-through with their promises; that all this hadn’t just been lip-service to appease their guilt. Still, Haru didn’t deny the seed of hope that’d been planted in his heart.

No one spoke up as they watched Haru leave with Sousuke, all of them conflicted with their own thoughts and concerns. Rei grasped Nagisa’s small hand when he noticed tears glistening in his bright, magenta eyes. Rin offered a similar show of support to a crestfallen Makoto by giving his hard shoulder a firm squeeze. While progress had been made, this only proved that the road ahead was still fraught with obstacles. The collective mood had suddenly become cold and empty, and none of them felt like prolonging the night any further.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“I just feel so bad for Nanase-kun. All cooped up in that house by himself. I don’t think I’ve ever seen anyone visit except for that big guy…Setsuka? Is that his name?” A mature, feminine voice spoke from inside the kitchen to the other adults seated at a rectangular table in the connected dining room. It was a little past eight o’clock at the Tachibana family house, and Makoto and Rin were visiting with his parents before it was time to retire for the evening. Left with no alternative, he and Rin were forced to spend the night since the nearest inn didn’t have an available room until the next day. The twins, now fourteen years old, would share Ran’s room so Makoto and Rin could crash in Ren’s bedroom; previously Makoto’s before he left for college.

“Sousuke,” Makoto corrected her as he absentmindedly picked at an imperfection in the wooden table’s flat surface. Rin was sitting next to him, slouching slightly with his arms crossed loosely against his stomach. Goro Tachibana was catty-corner to his oldest son, sipping from a small cup of hot tea prepared by his wife, Kayako. The twins, Ren and Ran, were in the living room watching TV, within earshot and view of the dining room but largely removed from the grown up discussion.

“That’s it.” Kayako said with a nod as she finished putting away some dishes before joining the others at the dinner table. “Big, tough looking guy. Do you know if they’re dating?” The question came out of left field and made her husband choke on his beverage, spilling a good portion of it on himself while Makoto and Rin bristled awkwardly. The Tachibana’s had no qualms about their son’s sexual preference, nor the preferences of his friends and acquaintances. It was actually a really admirable quality that made Rin glad for his friend to have grown up in such an accepting home. His own family was just as casual about his homosexuality, and living in Australia had certainly helped Rin to be comfortable with it too, but Japan was still largely behind the times when it came to general acceptance of gay relationships. He thought about Nagisa and Rei’s plight and how frustrating it must be for their love to not be acknowledged as valid by the government. He had no idea how their respective families felt about their relationship, but hoped it was something similar to Makoto’s situation.

“I don’t think so. Haru said they’re just friends.” Makoto clarified, grinning behind his hand as he watched his father pull his wet shirt away from his collarbone.

“If you say so. They’re always so attached at the hip, it wouldn’t surprise me if they were dating.” Kayako waved dismissively, still harboring a small inkling that Haru and Sousuke’s relationship wasn’t strictly platonic. From the living room, Ran’s pretty voice spoke loudly over the television for the adults to hear.

“Makoto’s right, Oka-san. Haru told me that Sousuke is just a friend.” She interjected, eyes never leaving the bright screen as some popular drama played out. Makoto leaned back in his seat to look at his younger sister.

“Haru talks to you?” His voice held mild surprise at the idea of Haru interacting with the twins. Back in the day, he’d basically been a surrogate older brother to them, never minding the way they clambered and clung to his arms or begged to be included in the older boys' plans.

“Yeah! He helps us take care of the stray cats around here. Even brings some of them to the vet if they’re sick or hurt.” Ren volunteered this time, his voice teetering between prepubescent and maturity. The elder Tachibana’s weren’t surprised, but Makoto and Rin exchanged looks that revealed their astonishment. It wasn’t implausible that Haru had a caring, sensitive side. Moreso, it was a relief and pleasant discovery.

“Haru is actually really cool. It’s just that he doesn’t like talking to people anymore.” Ran didn’t explain further, figuring it was plainly obvious to everyone else.

“I don’t blame him for backing off. Dealing with everything he’s been through would make anyone a little messed up…especially considering what happened with his uncle.” Kayako’s words were ominous and grabbed Rin’s attention, making him sit up a little in his seat and look over at Makoto to elaborate further. But then he caught the dour glances from Makoto and Goro towards the family matriarch.

“Oka-san, don’t.” The twenty-two year old implored in a hushed tone, his pale brow knitted together as a frown tugged on his lips. Had she just stumbled onto a buried landmine in the topic of Haruka Nanase’s life? She instantly pulled a contrite look and nodded curtly.

“You’re right. It’s not my place to bring that back up.” A beat of silence passed between the four adults seated at the table, with just the background noise of the television filling that void. “Still, I hope having you back in town will be a positive thing for him. If anyone can make Haru feel better again, it’s you.” Hoping to end the conversation on a brighter note, Kayako smiled at her handsome son, and he returned it with an appreciative grin of his own.

Some hours later, after showers and nighttime routines were completed and the house’s inhabitants were settled into their respective bedrooms, Makoto and Rin lay awake and unable to shut their minds down enough to fall asleep. Makoto’s large frame was uncomfortably confined to his brother’s twin-sized bed while Rin had a large enough futon rolled out on the floor to barely accommodate his full stature. The gentle street light pouring into the room from the window illuminated the space enough for them to see, but not so bright as to keep them awake. Thankfully, they’d only have to tolerate the unenviable arrangement for a single night. The space was silent except for a ceiling fan that ‘whooshed’ round and round above them.

“So, I take it that this version of Haruka Nanase is not what you hoped for?” Rin asked into the darkness as he watched the fan blades spinning overhead. One of his arms was bent beneath his head, serving as an added pillow, while the other was draped across his stomach. Makoto shifted on the cramped mattress, trying to find a comfortable position that just kept eluding him. He felt gangly and far too big, with his feet hanging off the end of the bed.

“Nope.” Was all he could think to say, but it was an inadequate reply. “But that’s okay. I’m gonna be there for him, if he likes it or not. I’m not abandoning him a second time.” There was a resoluteness to Makoto’s gentle voice that convinced Rin he meant it. Haru may not trust Makoto’s resolve yet, but it would be proven over and over until he finally believed his friend’s true intentions.

“What did your mom mean about his uncle? You told me about his parents dying right after graduation, but didn’t mention anything about an uncle.” Rin’s curiosity got the better of him, even though he felt a little guilty for prying into something that seemed to be a hot-button issue for Makoto.

“It’s not my story to share.” Was the other’s quick answer, shutting down further inquiries before Rin could argue. Makoto was flooded with the memory of finding Haru huddled in his bed, body broken and wrecked after Jiro’s horrific assault the night before. He remembered in explicit detail the smell of urine, the sound of Haru’s whimpering, and the sight of bruises and blood on his vulnerable body. The sound of his mother’s wailing was permanently implanted in his mind, as was the awkward talk his parents had to give him after things settled down. As traumatizing as it was for Haru to survive such a thing, Makoto also had to cope with his own lingering emotional scars. He drew a shaky breath and closed his eyes tightly.

“All I’ll say is that Haru has had to overcome more than his fair share of pain in this world. He’s been abused and betrayed in ways no one should ever experience. The best we can do for him is to be there and make him believe that he’s not alone anymore.” It was a promise he’d made to himself, shared now with Rin who vowed to do what he could to help Makoto. The whole situation with Haru felt bigger than anything else going on in his life, and Rin was glad to be considered so trustworthy by his friend.

“I don’t know him well enough yet, but I swear I saw Haru smiling and having a good time with you guys today. He keeps everything pretty close to his chest, but even I could tell he was glad to see everyone again.” It was meant to reassure Makoto that there was reason to hope for a good outcome, and it worked. Rin turned to look in Makoto’s direction, though he couldn’t see him from his low vantage on the floor. “It may take some time, but I definitely think he’ll come around to being close friends again.”

“Thanks man. I’m really glad you’re sticking around to move here with me. This would have been so much harder to do on my own.” The smile on Makoto’s face was evident in the warmth of his voice.

“Me too.” Rin ended their conversation with those two words, said with genuine conviction. He eventually slipped into unconsciousness, enjoying vivid dreams about racing against Haru and how exhilarating it’d feel.