Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

“— and she thinks she can just, like, strong arm me into a marriage or something? I mean, for fuck’s sake, I’m gay! She couldn’t have, I don’t know, picked a woman?” 

“You know she doesn’t care that you’re gay, Kit.” 

“I know that. So, instead I get a toad-adjacent prepubescent looking man who’s going to have to hang off my arm for all eternity just so that our image can take the beating it’s definitely going to take when she’s announces the merger—” 

Jade leaned against the wall and crossed her arms. She’d learned long ago that the best way to deal with Kit’s mood was to wait it out. 

Kit was a hurricane; a fucking force of nature. Usually, she’d blow herself out and then collapse, exhausted, against Jade and mutter something unintelligible that rhymed with, “You-know-what-I-mean?” 

Then, usually, Jade would provide some sort of reasonable sounding advice based on the contents of Kit’s rant, they’d gather themselves up, and go fix the problem. 

This time, because it was decidedly not usual, Jade had nothing.

You couldn’t leash a storm, and yet, it appeared that Sorsha was going to try. 

Kit had been tugging at her chain for years now, and Jade had watched, weary, as Kit’s frustration had mounted and her patience had thinned. 

“You can’t just get a divorce in a few years?” she asked, even though they’d been over that idea nearly ten times already.  

Jade was principled. Collected. 

Of course, she’d thought about asking Kit to run away with her and live out the rest of their lives in Mozambique or Bhutan or something. 

She knew what the answer would be. 

Kit would say yes. Immediately. When she was upset, Kit never thought more than three steps ahead. 

And despite the fact that all Jade wanted to do was wrap Kit up in a blanket, shove her into a suitcase, and flee the country, she was also in charge of the only bit of common sense her best friend possessed. 

So she didn’t ask.

“Sure, maybe in twenty years once she’s passed away or something, but it's mainly the principal of this whole thing that’s the issue.” Kit said, turning around and pacing back across the room. “I have plans, goddamnit. And she’s holding them over my fucking head. She just wants a massive media wedding to cover over the merger and fuck whatever happens to me afterward, right?” 

“Kit, she wants stability for you.” 

Kit let out an anguished groan. “I don’t need stability! I need a couple million in the bank and a room full of people who actually want to do something instead of fucking around using exploitative capitalist labor for profit.” 

Kit had taken a single economics course in college before deciding to major in Women and Gender Studies.

Jade sighed. “Kit.” 

“Jesus, I’m being held hostage here. If I say no, she cuts me out of the company, I lose all of my funding, and my initiative goes fucking tits up. I mean, the whole I-care-about-my-daughters-goal jig’s up at this point, but she could try and fake it a bit better.” 

“Kit.”

“And Graydon Hastur? Really?” 

“Kit.” 

“Stability, my fucking ass— she really wants control. And sure, after her mother, I get it, I really do. But you’d think she’d have a bit more perspective. She lived with a goddamn psychopath for her entire childhood!” 

“Kit!” 

“What!” 

Jade had long ago stopped trying to prevent herself from being swept into Kit’s orbit. Kit’s enthusiasm was magnetic, her ideas, her passion. 

“You have two minutes until your mother expects you to be on stage with her.” she said, instead of telling Kit she’d booked them both one way tickets to Argentina. “If you marry Graydon, you keep your company shares and the board’s support. You can do good in the world.” 

You could stay.

There was silence for a moment as Kit digested. She smiled bitterly.

“At the price of losing my sanity?”

She was a forest fire, brilliant and all consuming. Kit Tanthalos saw what needed to be done and charged towards it with a burning, single minded focus. 

“You might have to live in a house together, but that’ll be it.” Jade tried. 

Kit wilted further.

“She’ll want kids, you know. Eventually.” 

Jade sighed and reached for Kit’s arms. “We’ll deal with that one when it gets here. Maybe she’ll be more open to a divorce later on.” 

Kit let out a sigh and crumpled against Jade’s chest. They were both silent. Kit’s skin was warm. 

“Jade, you won’t let me do this alone, right?” Kit asked, quiet, but not scared; never scared. 

“I won’t.” Jade promised. 

And then there was a knock on the door and Prue's furious face hissed at them to “get a move on, ladies” because apparently Kit wasn’t going to make it on time. Jade followed Kit in a daze down the hallway. 

The passages behind the ballroom Sorsha had somehow procured for her luncheon were a labyrinth. Prue seemed to know her way around like it was her birthplace.

It probably was. They were close enough to the first circle of hell.

They found themselves in the backstage area. Through the curtains, Jade could see Sorsha, dressed in red and glowing in the stage lights. She said something to the audience, who laughed, but her words buzzed in Jade’s ears. 

Crowds were Kit’s thing. Wooing the room was Kit’s thing. Jade would rather scalp herself than leave the sanctity of the wings. 

As if she could hear Jade’s thoughts, Kit’s hand slipped into her’s. 

“I’m sorry, Jade.” she whispered, folding herself into Jade’s chest again. 

“For what? You don’t need to be sorry.” Jade said, as Kit tucked her head under Jade’s chin and let out a shuddering breath. “I’ll be with you the whole way. I promise.” 

Kit nodded, uncharacteristically without a word, and hooked her chin over Jade’s shoulder to stare vacantly into the darkness of the wings. 

Prue’s intern, Elora Danan, sprinted out of the opposite hallway. 

“The Hastur’s are in position. We are a go.” she managed breathlessly.

Kit pulled back and glanced up at Jade, searching Jade’s face for something. Perhaps she didn’t find it because she pulled herself closer instead.

“I really am sorry.” she whispered. And then she leaned up, and pressed her mouth to Jade’s. 

Her lips were warm and soft. Her hands gentle where they held Jade’s face. Jade’s world ceased to exist outside of the feeling of Kit’s eyelashes brushing against her cheek.

It crashed back in with a roar and the whole moment was over faster than Jade could process that one, she’d never kissed anyone sweeter than Kit Tanthalos; and two, that she’d probably never get to again.  

Then Prue was spinning Kit around, adjusting her hair, and shoving her out on stage. 

Kit donned a new personality like a suit of armor. Her back straightened, her smile unfolded across her face, sharp and cold. She marched to her mothers side; the right amount of arrogance people expected, and enough humility to keep them pacified. The perfect daughter, the future of the company. 

“— would like to say a few words of gratitude.” Sorsha stepped away from the microphone to exchange a wooden hug with Kit over the sound of the crowd’s applause. 

Behind them, the Hastur family stood almost robotically in the harsh stage lights. Graydon Hastur wasn’t hiding his nerves as well as Kit was, but then again, no one could. His hands twitched in his pockets.

“My mother already said it, but I would like to thank you again for being here tonight!” 

She sounded thrilled, excited even, but Jade had known how to spot Kit’s lies since she’d watched Kit vehemently deny punching a girl in the face for making fun of Jade’s hair in third grade. The girl in question had been bleeding profusely barely three steps away, and Jade was pretty sure that a teacher had watched the entire thing go down.

Kit had somehow gotten away with it. 

“We’ve had a remarkably tough year, and I am in awe of the continuous dedication you have shown. In 1988, Tanthalos founded itself on commitment, resilience, and the shoulders of the few who rose to meet the demand for cutting edge medical technology. Today, thanks to each and every member of our greater family, Tanthalos continues to do the same.” 

The applause was deafening. Kit grabbed the microphone. 

Her hands were shaking which was weird because Kit’s hands never shook.

“I am thankful to the members of the press and to the families of our team that have shown up today. Your support as well, deserves recognition.” 

Applause again. 

“There is more I could say to thank you for your commitment, but I would instead like to talk about something close to my own heart. Something just as important.” 

Jade’s head snapped up. Next to her, Elora and Prue sucked in matching breaths. 

“Tanthalos was also founded on the promise of discovery. We are a mission driven company; bio-tech is, and always will be, about seeking new frontiers and pushing the boundaries of what we know to be possible.” 

Jade had heard Kit’s speech nearly a hundred times over now, and she knew with 100% certainty that whatever that was, wasn’t in it. 

Fundamentally, Kit couldn’t leave the company. She had things she needed to do with the money tied up in her shares that would be lost if she quit early. She needed the support of the board. That was what Sorsha was counting on, of course. Kit couldn’t afford to turn down the marriage proposal.

If she were pushed hard enough, though...

Kit was reckless and brash, something her polished armor always failed to completely hide. 

“The world is wide, and filled with so many kinds of people.” 

Jade wasn’t thinking. She turned to Elora and pointed to one of the rings on her finger. 

“Give that to me.” 

Elora handed it over without question, and then Jade was striding on stage. 

She tried for Kit’s brilliant smile. To her right, Sorsha’s piercing stare was sharper than the spotlights. Jade swallowed her fear. 

For Kit, and only Kit, would she endure this.

“It is why I would like to announce my—” 

For an audience of several hundred, there was remarkably little noise coming from the direction of the crowd. Jade’s footsteps echoed. 

Kit turned and her perfect expression cracked briefly.

Confusion, perhaps. Resignation.

Jade slid an arm around Kit’s waist and drew her close, hoping Kit was clever enough to get the fucking memo. 

“— our partnership with the Trisha Davis Queer Youth Support Foundation.” Jade finished for her. She sounded fucking terrified. Next to her, Kit wasn’t breathing. 

There was a weak smattering of applause.

Jade cleared her throat and tried for something more confident.

“In honor—” She squeezed Kit’s side. 

Sorry. 

“— of our upcoming wedding.” 

And then Jade turned, bent down on one knee, and said with bravado she didn’t have, “Kit Tanthalos, will you do me the immense honor of being my wife.” 

The crowd erupted. 

—

“Are you insane! ” Sorsha snarled as she yanked Kit around the corner and into a backroom. 

Kit hadn’t released her death grip on Jade’s hand, so Jade flew with her like a ribbon on the breeze. 

“Of course not.” Kit answered with a sharp smile. She tugged Jade close. “You get your wedding. I get my funding. Everyone wins.” 

Jade wasn’t sure that everyone was winning right now. She hadn’t thought that through. It had been rash, and stupid —

Sorsha scoffed. “I’m sorry? You expect me to believe that this isn’t something you’ve come up with to get out of any sort of responsibility I might offer you?” 

Kit bristled. “Offer me? I wasn’t aware it was an offer, Mom. Felt an awful lot like a threat to me.” 

“You are a child, Kit! A child!” In a rather spot-on imitation of Kit, Sorsha paced back towards the wall, her fingers on her temple. “Do you have any idea what you’ve just done?” 

“Yes, yes, you’ve promised a broodmare to the Hastur’s and now—” 

“Our merger was based on your marriage. Ronam Hastur was under the impression that his son would receive 51% of the company, Kit. But the shares are, and always will be, in your name. As long as you could have convinced that stupid boy to sign a prenup, you would have owned both companies. Don’t you understand?” 

“And what if I don’t want both companies?” Kit snapped. 

“Let me guess, you want to make a difference in the world? ” Sorsha said tightly. “Kit, I’m handing you the world's largest hammer and you’re telling me you want to build with a fucking stick instead.” 

Kit’s mouth snapped shut and she stiffened. 

Jade had the immediate and overwhelming impression that she’d outplayed herself. 

She’d thought she’d been protecting Kit, from Graydon, from some loveless marriage... she didn’t even know what at this point. Kit had just been so upset and Jade hadn’t thought it through—

“Sorsha, I’m sorry—” 

“You can keep out of this for now.” Sorsha barked. She didn’t turn her stare away from her daughter. “As the heir to the company and as the one who is going to now have to be responsible for the fallout associated with pissing off our largest competitor, I’d like to hear Kit’s thoughts on how we might proceed.” 

Kit’s jaw worked. She didn’t let go of Jade. 

There was a long moment of silence. 

“Fine.” Kit said. “Here’s my proposal. I’ve been saying for a very long time that we need to be doing more community outreach in order to solidify our brand as something more than a medical tech supplier. I will throw the world’s most elaborate wedding, market it as a publicity fundraiser, and donate 100% of the profits to Trisha Davis. I will work with outreach in the meantime to start the tech opportunities initiative with Trisha Davis— that I’ve been asking to start for two years now, by the way— in order to keep us in the headlines and bury whatever Hastur Industries attempts to use to compete with us until the wedding has finished. Sound good?” 

Sorsha regarded Kit with supremely reigned in anger. The silence stretched thin. 

“Fine.” she said. 

Kit’s eyes widened. “Really?”  

“Yes.” Sorsha said. “I have conditions, of course. I want weekly reports emailed to Prue, and I want Elora Danan on your team for the time being to oversee and liaise with upper level management.” 

Kit twitched but didn’t say anything. 

“And you,” Sorsha leveled Jade with a chilling stare. “That proposal didn’t convince anyone. The minute the public figures out that this —” she gestured derisively towards the arm Kit still hard around Jade’s waist. “—isn’t real, the backlash is going to be swift and brutal. Prepare yourself accordingly because I will cut her out if, and when, she becomes an issue for the company. I really expected better from you.” 

Sorsha slammed the door behind her on the way out. 

Kit immediately unwrapped her arm and Jade’s stomach caved in. Of course Kit was mad. Jade had just single handedly ruined her entire future by proposing to her in front of a massive crowd, forcing her back into marriage just as quickly as she’d tried to get herself out of it, and ripping a fortune out of her hands.

“Kit, I’m so sorry—” 

But Kit was grinning, brilliantly, honestly. 

“You,” she whispered, grabbing Jade’s arms. “Are a fucking genius.” 

“I am?” Jade asked, wearily searching Kit’s face. “You’re not... mad?” 

“Mad?” Kit said. She looked surprised by the idea that ‘mad’ was an option. “Of course not.” 

“But according to your mother it sounds like we’re going to have to actually go through with all of it and—” 

“And? You’re my best friend, Jade! We already spend most of our time together, how much different is this going to be?” She suddenly spun back around towards Jade, face falling. “Oh my god, do you regret it? Did I make you feel like you needed to do that, or something? Shit, Jade—”

Jade shook her head and laughed weakly. “No, no, I don’t regret it... I just didn’t really think it through, that’s all. Sort of a spur of the moment decision.” 

Kit’s eyes were twinkling again as she nudged Jade’s arm. 

“Spur of the moment? Am I rubbing off on you?” she said, grinning. She turned towards the door. “Come on, this is going to be so fucking fun. You know, they always say your partner should be your best friend.” 

Best friend.

The words sat funny in Jade’s chest, but for once in her goddamn life, she was done analyzing things. She was going to make this easy because they were best friends. And it didn’t matter that for some reason, Kit had kissed her right before going on stage. 

Because friends kiss. Sometimes.

Add that to the list of things she wasn’t going to think about.

“Yeah, okay.” Jade breathed, and followed Kit out the door. 

Chapter Text

“Yep, really good— tuck the thumb— nice.” 

Jade didn’t box professionally anymore, but she still appreciated the satisfying sound of fists pounding against the punching bag. 

Santiago looked over at her after the set. 

He was a shy kid; a lot of people assumed he wasn’t cut out for boxing. Hell, she’d assumed that at the beginning. He’d been a skinny little thing then, wouldn’t look her in the eye. He’d blended right in with the rest of the class of kids, all clamoring for her attention. 

But then he’d tucked his head down, gotten to work, and within a few months, was laying kids twice his size flat on their back.

“Good work today.” she called to him as the class packed up.

He turned so she wouldn’t see him smile. She saw it anyway.

“Your mom coming to regionals?” 

He yanked off his gloves. “Maybe.” 

“Hey.” When he turned to look at her, she raised her eyebrows. “You have my number if you need a ride, right?” 

He nodded. 

“That goes for all of you, by the way.” she yelled to the room. 

They were all good kids. Most of them were having trouble in school, a couple of them had issues at home; she gathered bits and pieces from their sporadic conversation. 

Either way, they’d all ended up here, which she considered a massive win.

Vera walked over with a piece of paper. “Can you sign this?” 

Jade grabbed a pen. “What is it?” 

“Permission slip.” Vera rolled her eyes. “You need to put your number, too.” 

“Does this have anything to do with you skipping school like fifteen times last quarter?” 

Vera snatched the permission slip back. “No.” 

“Liar. Keep your ass in school, hear me? I’ll cut you from my regionals.” 

Vera grinned. “Whatever.” 

“Don’t you ‘whatever’ me—” Someone in the parking lot beeped their car horn an obnoxious number of times. “Jesus, who the fuck...” 

Miles poked his head back inside the front doors of the gym. He grimaced.

“Uh, Jade, there’s some fancy lady here for you. Says she doesn’t wanna get out of her car.” 

Kit. Obviously.

Jade swallowed. They were supposed to be going for their weekly ice-cream run after Jade’s classes, but Kit was at least half an hour early.

“It’s Jade’s work wife.” Santiago said loudly from across the room. He ducked his head again when Jade glared.

“I work here, idiot.” 

Vera looked delighted. “Regular wife, then?” 

“Shut it you.” 

So, Jade hadn’t told the kids about her eventful Saturday and the upcoming change in her marital status... In fact, she hadn’t told much of anyone, despite it being printed loud and clear in apparently every goddamn newspaper in the grocery store.

The car horn blared again. Miles’ head poked back inside. 

“She says, ‘Hurry it up, babe. I’ve got the AC on.’” Miles cracked a huge grin. 

“She said babe?” Jade asked before she’d thought about it. “Never mind, hurry up guys.” 

“She said babe?” Vera mocked on her way out. She wiggled her eyebrows. “See you Wednesday.”

“Get out of my gym, Hudson.” 

When the rest of the students had packed up, Jade grabbed her things and stepped outside to lock up.

Kit’s disgusting, beat up, lime green car was stopped in the middle of the lane, completely blocking traffic. Jade could see Kit in the front seat, phone against her ear, talking loudly. She yelled something and then hung up.

A car behind her honked at her. Kit stuck a middle finger out of the window. 

Jesus.

“You need to get ticketed more often.” Jade grumbled as she slipped into the passenger seat. She waved an apology at the person behind them. 

Kit grinned, eyes hidden behind massive, circular sunglasses. “It’s not illegal.”

“Just annoying.” 

“Well, I would have parked, but it’s kind of an emergency.” 

“Yeah, you’re like twenty minutes early.” Jade said as they peeled out of the parking lot. “What’s going on?” 

“There’s been a change of plans.” Kit said. She turned a sharp left and Jade winced as she heard her water bottle fall over in her bag. It was probably going to leak from its stupid straw lid top again. “We’re headed to meet with Sidone Davis.” 

“What?” Jade said, sitting up. “Kit, I haven’t showered.” 

Kit’s phone buzzed, and she picked it up to look at the screen. Whatever it was failed to impress her, and she tossed it back into the cupholder. 

“Yeah, sorry about the rush. I went by the store and bought dry shampoo, deodorant, face-wipes, and that brand of BB cream you use that’s like medium coverage but not cakey or anything—” 

Kit cut directly in front of a sedan, who who’s driver gestured angrily out the window behind them.

“Kit!” 

“I know, I know, I also brought one of my blazers for you to wear.” Kit said, checking her side mirror as if somehow that would fix her driving issues. “We’re meeting at Sidone’s house though, so it’s not particularly formal.” 

Jade chewed her lip. “Is that code for: your mother and the board don’t know about this one?” 

“Yep!” Kit said happily. “I just need to sit down with her and outline our goals before the intern and the Tanthalos bureaucracy get into my plans and mess them all up.” 

“The intern is named Elora.” Jade said. 

Kit rolled her eyes. “Rhymes with ‘corporate spy for my mother.’”

“It doesn’t, actually.” Jade leveled a glance at Kit. “You’re a brilliant person, but don’t forget that you’re going to need help once you get past the ideas stage.” 

“Yeah, but that’s what you’re here for?” Kit said. She sighed when Jade raised an eyebrow. “Okay, fine. I’ll call Elora on the way home and update her. Oops—” 

Kit cut in front of a massive eighteen wheeler with a little squeak of surprise. Jade was slammed back into her seat as Kit floored the accelerator and whipped down a lefthand side street. 

Jade actually didn’t have a single clue how Kit managed to get her drivers license. 

Kit had crashed four cars in eight years and had doggedly insisted on paying for a new one herself each time. Of course, as far as Jade was aware, Kit was also paid an insane amount for whatever she did in the Tanthalos marketing department so it wasn’t exactly breaking the bank for her.

She meant well though, Jade assumed. Kit always did.  

“You can change in the back. You’ve got like forty minutes; Sidone lives on the other side of the Bay.” Kit said, charging valiantly in front of a moving van in order to make the light. She pulled onto the highway and immediately punched to eighty-seven.

Jade was going to be sick. 

She unbuckled herself and climbed over the center console. Kit had been kind enough to lay everything out neatly in the back. 

Jade stripped off her sweaty clothing. In deference to Jade’s sanity and reasonable sense of fashion, Kit had brought her the navy blazer. 

Jade put it on.

“Goes well with the jeans, huh?” Kit said. Via the rear view mirror, Jade could see her raising her eyebrows over her glasses like some sort of fucked up owl.

“Yeah, yeah, whatever.” Jade said as she buckled herself into the front again and started on her face. 

“Thanks, by the way.” Kit said. She looked over at Jade and chewed at the inside of her cheek. “With all of this. I know it’s not exactly what you wanted to be doing with your time.”

Jade didn’t bother telling Kit that it was exactly what she’d like to be doing with her time. 

Jade glanced over at her. “We’re in this together, okay? I promised.” 

Kit smiled. “Your hair looks nice.” 

“Eyes on the road, Tanthalos.” 

Jade looked at least somewhat presentable, and was entirely motion sick, by the time they pulled into the driveway of a small townhouse in West Oakland. 

“I’m driving next time.” Jade announced, exhausted, as Kit walked around the front of the car to join her.

Kit brushed a nonexistent hair off of Jade’s shoulder and straightened her lapels. “You say that every time.” 

“And I mean it every time.” Jade muttered, ignoring the little flutter in her stomach. 

She followed Kit up the path to the front door. 

Kit paused before knocking. “We’re getting married.”

“What? Yeah, I know. I proposed.” Jade said. 

Kit looked at her like she was unintelligent and grabbed her hand. “We’re going to have to act like it, okay?” 

Jade noticed, not for the first time in her life, that Kit’s hand was warm. She’d also pushed her round sunglasses up on top of her head so that Jade could see her eyes.

Kit had lovely eyes, Jade thought. 

“Okay.” Jade said.

“Sorry, I guess I’ve been putting off talking about the specifics.” Kit said with a tight laugh. “Just didn’t want to bring up the weird parts of being married to your best friend before I had to, you know?” 

Weird parts...

Jade nodded, mouth slightly dry. “Me either.” 

“So, we’ll hold hands, obviously.” 

“Yeah, obviously.” 

“We should probably touch each other a lot, too.” 

“Yeah, of course.” 

“I— or at least, it would make sense, for us to kiss or something. Maybe.” 

Kit was staring dead ahead at the door. Jade looked at her shoes.

It was silent for a moment. 

“Kiss like...” Jade started. 

Sidone Davis opened the door with a wide smile. 

“What are you two doing out here?” she laughed. It was a warm laugh. “Ah, sorry! Feel like I’m interrupting your pregame or something.” 

Jade felt like a loose shutter in the wind. 

Kit reacted a lot faster, hand already out.

“Sorry, we were just about to ring! Nice to meet you, I’m Kit Tanthalos. We spoke on the phone.” 

They shook hands.

“This is my... fiancée, Jade Claymore.” 

Still feeling like she was swinging wildly against the side of a building, Jade tried to pull it together enough to shake Sidone’s hand. 

“Come on inside, you two. I’m excited to talk.”  

Jade followed Kit inside, desperately trying to get her shit together. 

God, how had she thought she could do this? 

“I confess, I’m rather surprised by the swiftness of this whole thing.” Sidone said, as she lead them into the living room. “For some reason, I had expected that you’d not want to talk for a good few months.”

Having pulled it together enough, Jade snorted. “If anyone other than Kit was here, yeah, you’d be looking at months. Fortunately, Kit isn’t aware that most people operate somewhere under the speed of sound.”

Kit glanced at Jade, a smile playing at the corners of her mouth. “Still feeling motion sick, darling?” 

She squeezed Jade’s hand.

Jade nearly choked.

“I understand congratulations are in order?” Sidone said as they all sat in the living room. 

“Oh, thanks.” Jade said, ordering a smile to her face. All of the sudden, she felt like she was back under the stage lights. 

Sidone had a stare eerily reminiscent of Sorcha’s laser eyes.

“Aiming for a late summer wedding.” Kit said cheerily. She redirected flawlessly, “Speaking of which, I’m hoping you took a look at the email I sent on Thursday?” 

“Yes, quite unexpected, yet again.” Sidone said. She leaned back in her chair and folded her hands on her lap. “You’re using your wedding to fundraise?” 

Jade glanced down at Kit’s left hand as she spoke. Kit had put on Elora’s ring for this meeting. 

Sorcha had been right. The ring didn’t look particularly proposal worthy— especially not for the heir of a trillion dollar enterprise.

Sidone didn’t look like she was particularly suspicious about their... arangment, but then again, she didn’t seem like the kind of person to toss judgements around carelessly.

“Well, yes— kind of. That’s what I wanted to start today with.” Kit said. She pulled out a bulging manilla folder from the bag at her side. An errant paper slipped out. Jade picked it up and handed it to her. “Thanks. My aim is to add our fundraiser proceeds to the money the Foundation will get from Tanthalos. Hopefully, this will give us the ability to set up something permanent that can fund itself in time.”

Sidone was nodding. “What exactly are you envisioning for the start of this program?” 

Bingo.

Kit’s eyes lit up. “Yes, so, I’m thinking we organize ourselves around the mid-afternoon window that most working parents need filled by some sort of childcare—” 

Kit was leaned forward again, pulling paper after paper out of the folder. Somewhere in between she’d managed to get her laptop out and open.

“I’ve put together some rough cost estimates—” 

Sorcha had decided to do damage control at her luncheon after Jade’s surprise proposal, and had ordered them to go home immediately. Kit had spent the entire drive chatting excitedly about her plans for the partnership with the Trisha Davis Foundation. 

And then, with Jade’s work schedule and Kit’s odd hours in and out of the office, they hadn’t exactly spent time together. 

For four days.

Which was weird for them, sure, but given the sheer rainforest of paper Kit was pulling out, along with the number of Excel spreadsheets open on her computer, Jade had a pretty good idea what Kit had spent the last few days doing.

She wondered how much sleep Kit had gotten. 

“Well, I’m hoping to get educators from the community, but also look at students who have graduated high school here and are interested in staying. A part of the funding might go towards perhaps getting a few of those kids through college for something like software engineering or computer science.” Kit was suggesting. 

“I’m in touch with a lot of the high schools here, I can look into how we might connect to the kids.” Sidone said. 

“If you’re interested in community connections,” Jade leaned forward. “I’m in touch with a lot of parents through my gym, and I’ve got a bunch of former friends who also did things like adolescent psychology and education in college. I’d be happy to call them up and see what they’re doing.” 

“That would be a good start on the staff side of this.” Sidone said. She glanced over at Jade. “You went to school around here?” 

“Not quite.” Jade laughed it off.

“She got a full ride to UCSD.” Kit said, when it became clear that Jade wasn’t going to offer any more information. “She’s painfully humble, as you can see.” 

Jade looked away so that Kit wouldn’t see her smile.

Sidone laughed. “Pretty impressive. Is that where you two met?” 

Jade sat up.

“Okay, it’s really not that interesting of a story—” Kit started. 

“Oh, no, it’s fantastic.” Jade promised, grinning widely when Kit protested. “So, basically, we used to live in the same area for elementary school. It was this preppy ass private school, I was a scholarship kid, and apparently that mattered to a bunch of seven year olds because one of them said something about me—” 

“You can’t even remember what it was!” Kit groaned, face flushed red. 

“— honestly, the rudest thing you’ve ever heard from a boy who was still learning addition, and Kit fully tackled him into the swimming pool. Like, linebacker-style shoulder to the gut.” 

“And then I apologized and everything was fine.” Kit said, staring daggers at Jade.

“Oh, absolutely not.” Jade laughed, batting away Kit’s hand as she tried to hit her. “It gets better.” 

“Well, they weren’t going to punish me! My mom is Sorsha Tanthalos, and she made up a solid fifty percent of their financial contributions at that point.” Kit said defensively. “What was I supposed to do?”

“Maybe, like, tell a teacher? We were seven.” Jade huffed. “Anyway, Kit went home and complained to her parents and the next thing we all knew, we were having school-wide mandatory lectures on the “socio-economic history” of the Bay Area.” 

Kit crossed her arms and rolled her eyes. “If he was going to talk shit, I wanted him to know exactly what the fuck he was talking shit about.” She glanced at Sidone. “Sorry, that was a bad word.” 

“Which one.” Sidone said, biting back a smile. “Sounds like a good plan though.”

Kit turned to Jade with a smug look. 

“It was breaking, like, a million school rules.” Jade reminded her. 

“Well, you couldn’t break them so I was just doing it for you.” Kit said primly. “And you wouldn’t have helped me research if you didn’t think it was a good idea.” 

“I’d like to say I was coerced.” 

“You know what,” Kit sat forward with a emphatic cough. “Let’s get back to the important things, yeah?” 

—

They ended up leaving Sidone’s house two hours later, with a rather large stack of photocopied notes. 

They played quiet music as Kit sped down the highway.

“I wa— should get you a ring.” Kit said into the darkness of the car. Jade could only see her face in little flashes as the streetlights passed by. 

“I was thinking the same thing, actually.” Jade said. “Elora’s is great, but it’s not particularly proposal worthy.” 

“Wait— this is Elora’s?” Kit said, aghast. 

“What, you think I had time to fucking smith something in the wings?” Jade asked. 

Kit shuddered. “Yeah, no, let's get new ones.” 

When they pulled up to Jade’s apartment, Kit rummaged around in her wallet and handed Jade a card. 

Jade looked at it with a raised eyebrow. “What’s this for?” 

Kit rolled her eyes. Her face was tight in a weird way.

“Look, this whole marriage thing is fake and I know you proposed to save me from a life of grief with Graydon Hastur because you are honestly, truly, the bestest friend anyone could ever ask for, so I just don’t want this to be an inconvenience to you, or anything.” 

Ah. Of course.

The crux of Jade’s issue was never far off, was it. It swung in like a lead pendulum.

“Kit, this isn’t an inconvenience.” Jade tried for sincere and landed somewhere south of strangled. “I’m... best friends with you for a reason. It’ll be fun.” 

Kit laughed a little, but there was something off about it. 

“Yeah, yeah, whatever.” she said. “Okay, I’m just going to give this to you—” She slipped past Jade’s hands to shove the card in Jade’s duffle. “— and just use it if you want to. No pressure.” 

Jade nodded, still slightly stupified. She got out of the car and headed for the front door of her building. 

“Hey! Jade!” Kit yelled obnoxiously loudly from somewhere behind her. “Goodnight!” 

It echoed in the dark street and Jade pretended to groan and roll her eyes. She could hear Kit’s laugh.

It wasn’t until she shut her front door and toed off her shoes that she paused to wonder when she’d stopped being able to read Kit’s mood so well. 

Chapter Text

Through the phone, Jade heard Scorpia choke. 

“You... what?” 

“Yeah.” Jade sighed, dodging someone on the sidewalk. “It’s been all over the news, actually.” 

“You know I don’t read that shit, J.” There was the sound of shuffling and then a creak of springs as Scorpia flopped down onto something. “Start from the beginning.” 

Jade tucked her baseball cap down lower and said quietly, “Okay, look, there’s an explanation for this whole thing. It was Graydon Hastur, Scorpia. Like, I wasn’t going to just let that happen to her.” 

“So you proposed ?” 

Jade scratched her head. “Yeah.” 

“Jade, she doesn’t even—” 

“Hold on.” 

Jade glanced back at her phone to double check the address, and then with a growing sense of foreboding, pushed open the doors to Barcheré. 

Glass display cases around the room housed massive, glittering stones. Flat, white lights illuminated the entire store like a mental hospital. 

She felt simultaneously overwhelmed and incredibly stifled. 

A man approached. “How can I help you today?” 

Jade cleared her throat, mollified by the fact that at least the room wasn’t large enough to echo. She hoped that Scorpia couldn’t hear her voice through the phone.

“Yeah, um, I just proposed to my girlfriend, but I need... uh, a replacement ring?” 

Damn it, she sounded too unsure.

The man— Ronald, his nametag read— nodded as if she’d given completely understandable instructions. “Yes, of course. If you show me a photo of the original ring we can look for something similar?” 

“Oh, uh, no.” she tried. Ronald looked briefly put out so she added, “I didn’t lose it or anything I just don’t like it.” Ronald blinked again. “I’m gonna try to go for something completely different. Something simple, I think. Silver. Yeah, definitely silver. Oh, and also I need, like, a wedding ring.” 

Ronald nodded, apparently a consummate professional. “I’ll pull some band styles from the back for you to take a look at. Please feel free to sit. Would you care for some champagne?”

God, yes.

“Uh... sure.” Jade said.

Ronald walked off and Scorpia’s snort echoed loudly through the phone. “Oh, this is too good. Surprised I didn’t hear him piss himself. He’s picking out Kit Tanthalos’s wedding ring.” 

“Don’t think he knows that just yet.” Jade pressed the phone back to her ear, hoping Ronald couldn’t hear, and went to sit. “Yesterday, I ran into some reporters for the Sun and nearly lost it. They were at my bagel shop ! My fucking bagel shop!”

“You’re marrying into, like, the richest family north of Antarctica, bitch, what did you expect?” 

Sure, she should have seen her entire life getting invaded and turned upside down as a consequence of her actions, but she hadn’t really been thinking. Which was unlike her. And now she was at a bougie ass jewelers picking out rings with way more than four zeros on the price tag. 

Jade grumbled. “Kit said the same thing, and then asked if I wanted her to send the private security guys over to my place.” 

“And you said no?” 

“Well, she also said that I can’t just punch an online invasion of privacy, so I’ve compromised and there’s some man coming to add motion sensors to my windows tomorrow.” 

“Damn, you’re really turning into one of them now.” 

“Shut up.” 

“Your champagne?” Ronald emerged from the back room with the silence and surprise of a 17th century ghost, bearing a silver tray and two champagne flutes. “I’ve got a Moët and Chandon or a Korbel.” 

Jade tried for a smile and took the one on the left. “Thanks, Ronald.” 

He floated off again.

“Don’t say anything.” she said into the phone.

Scorpia was silent long enough for Jade to think she really might be in the clear before, “How long before you try to buy my apartment block and replace everything with glass and concrete?” 

“Literally, why am I speaking to you right now?” 

“Is it because, maybe, you wanted the only person who knows about your deeply rooted feelings for your best friend to tell you that marrying her is a really bad move? ” Scorpia said. 

Well, damn.

“I’m not, like, in love with—” 

“Who proposed again?” 

“Well, me, but—” 

“There you go, then.” 

Jade took a measured breath. 

Scorpia could be crude about a lot of things, and was potentially the most insensitive person Jade knew, but at the end of the day—

“She would have been so miserable.” Jade was being defensive but also, “I couldn’t just let it happen. How I feel about her aside, she’s my best friend and I wouldn’t have let her do that to herself.” 

“And you’re telling me that the idea of seeing her marry someone else wasn’t a, I don’t know, major fucking factor in your decision to propose to her?” Scorpia asked. 

Yes.

“Of course not, I— Jesus !” 

Ronald had appeared at her elbow. 

“I’ve laid out a few bands for you to take a look at over here.” He directed her over to a side table. 

Twelve silver bands rested on white fabric. They looked exactly the same. The champagne was not helping enough with the nasty realization that she was fully in over her head. 

“Well, that one’s a bit thick.” Jade said stupidly, pointing at one on the left. She felt a bit thick herself.

Ronald looked incredibly disappointed in himself as he removed it from the table, so Jade sat down and tried to involve herself a little more. 

“No, definitely nothing with all these gems— or that. I also don’t like the metal on this one, yeah... too warm.” 

Scorpia’s laughter was a bit loud over the phone now. 

“Look,” Jade hissed as Ronald frantically sprinted to the back room to select more bands. “I’m doing what I think is best right now.” 

“No, you’re being an idiot.” Scorpia said. Jade could hear the sound of a chip bag opening in the background. “You seriously need to think about your long term plan here so that you don’t end up getting angry with her.” 

Angry? With Kit? 

“I can’t be angry with Kit.” Jade said. Sure, Kit owned far too many argyle sweater vests to be considered sane and had a nasty habit of disappearing for hours at a time when she was upset— but she never did anything cruel. 

Scorpia sounded unbothered as she crunched through something. “Think that’s going to hold up four years into her stamping all over your unrequited feelings?” When Jade was silent, Scorpia said, “You’re really smart, J, but this was a stupid move, even for you.” 

Jade’s mouth tightened. “Oh, thanks.”

She could practically hear Scorpia rolling her eyes. “Not like that. You just usually think things through and—” 

“And what? End up with the most logical outcome?” 

“Well... yeah.” 

Jade was pinching one of the rings between her fingers and she dropped it angrily.

“And what? I choose something that might make me happy for, like, the first time ever—” 

“Jade, she doesn’t even like you!” 

“She kissed me!” 

“She what ?” 

“New rings?” 

“ Jesus fuck!” Jade clapped a hand to her chest. 

Sensing that he had perhaps interrupted something, Ronald rocked to a halt. 

“Perhaps some more champagne?” 

Getting absolutely hammered sounded amazing but, “You know what?” Jade stood and tried to smile. “Ronald, I’m so sorry but I’m not feeling well. Perhaps today isn’t the day. Thanks a lot.” 

There would probably be some sort of trending Tweet about Kit Tanthalos’ unstable fiancée tomorrow, but Jade was well past giving a fuck. 

When she’d made it outside, she ducked into an alleyway and leaned up against the concrete. After scrubbing her face vigorously with her hands a few times to get it the fuck together, she raised the phone back to her ear. 

“Sorry, I’m back.” 

Scorpia was silent for a moment before, “She kissed you?” 

“Yeah. Right before she went on stage to make her speech about leaving the company and going to travel the world and whatnot.”

Scorpia sighed. “Damn.”

“No shit.” Jade whispered, and then she said, “Not really sure what to do with that one.” 

“Ignore it?” 

“Trying that currently, I’ll let you know how it goes.” 

“Can I say something that might be controversial based on what I’ve just spent the last ten minutes saying?” 

“I can’t stop you.” 

“Do you think she might have feelings for you?” 

Jade laughed, and wasn’t particularly surprised to find a hint of bitterness folded in. “No.” 

Yes.

Of course it was yes . Of course Jade was furiously squashing the idea that her best friend had feelings for her based on one stupid, stupid kiss. Of course Jade wanted, desperately, for it to be true. 

But she was also not stupid. 

And she knew when she was deluding herself. 

“She was leaving. She was desperate.” Jade whispered. “It was a mistake.” 

“I see.” Scorpia said as if she’d picked up everything Jade had meant to say. 

Scorpia crunched into another handful of chips and Jade pulled the phone away from her ear with a scowl. She caught sight of a calendar notification. 

 “Shit, I gotta go, we’ve got a wedding meeting with Sorsha’s intern. I’ll see you on Thursday, right?”

“Yeah.” Scorpia said, and then, “Hey, I love you, okay?” 

The anger gnawed a little harder at her insides, but she pushed it away to say, “Love you too, bye.”

—

“Sorry, I’m late.” Jade said as she rushed into the conference room. 

Tanthalos Industries was, and always had been, a maze. Despite wrestling Kit out of her office countless times, Jade had never truly been able to memorize the place. 

Kit sat across from Elora, arms folded, eyebrows raised haughtily. The animosity was stifling and Jade’s pre-boiled sense of foreboding intensified. 

“No worries.” Elora said with a bright smile. “We were just about to get started.” 

Jade glanced at the diametric seating arrangements and said, “I’m guessing Kit won't talk to you?” 

Elora shook her head, her smile still resolutely plastered on. “Nope.” 

There was an easy way and a hard way to everything and Kit Tanthalos nearly always took the road most obstructed. Jade wasn’t in the mood to deal with it. 

“Kit.” Jade leveled her with a stare, and Kit groaned. 

“Corporate spy?” she muttered. “Wants to out me to my mom?” 

“You’re already out to your mother, stop being melodramatic.” 

Kit let out another groan and draped herself pathetically across the table. “Can’t, permanent state of being.” 

Jade bit her tongue to prevent herself from saying something rude that rhymed with, “Grow up.” 

“Jade, now that you’re here,” Elora delicately placed a well manicured hand out on the walnut tabletop and said, “Let’s make one thing perfectly clear. 

I am not under any sort of delusion that this is a real wedding, I’m fully aware you aren’t— and have never been— dating, and that if this doesn’t go off well for both of you, Kit: you’re fucked, and Jade, you’re more metaphorically fucked but it still applies, I guess.” 

Nice. Great. Wonderful.

Kit blinked and then turned to Jade with wide eyes. “See, my mother’s told her everything.” 

“Oh my God, Kit—” 

Elora scoffed but managed to maintain her unaffected stare. “Do you think I’m stupid?” 

Bad question, Jade thought miserably. 

“Yes!” Kit laughed. 

Jade’s head dropped into her hands again. She should have stayed for the champagne. Perhaps Ronald did deliveries.

Kit continued, “You’re only here because you dated my brother for an actual, single second.” 

“And you’re here based on... what? Your hard work and perfect resume?” 

Touché.

Kit tapped a finger against the table, eyes narrowing. “Yes.” 

Jade couldn’t hold back a snort. “Don’t pretend on me, nepotism baby.” 

“I thought you were on my side, fiancée. ” 

“Was until you decided to ignore the fact that your last name is conveniently also the name of the company you work for.” 

“Coincidence.”  

“Oh, you tell ‘em, babe.” 

“Ugh, whatever.” Kit spun around in a slow circle on her chair, refusing to look at either of them now. 

Jade bit at the inside of her cheek for a moment, debating the pro’s and con’s of arguing with Kit right now. 

The angry thing bit with her.

Elora interrupted. “Right, we’ve got four main areas of concern: venue, food and drink, your wedding parties, and publicity. I’ll handle all of the tiny stuff, obviously, but I’ll need your input for general specifics.” 

“Can our color scheme be blue?” Kit asked, still spinning. “Like a sort of ashy greenish, maybe?” 

Unfettered, Elora jotted something down and then said, “Sure, anyway, the key thing that we need to talk about today are Sorsha’s requests.” 

That got Kit’s attention and she fixed Elora with a cautious stare. 

“She wants you to make friends with Graydon Hastur.” 

Oh, shit.

Kit was out of her chair and Jade only barely got to her by the time she reached the door. She barred the exit with her body and pushed Kit back towards the table. 

“Kit, no.” 

“I actually will fucking scream at this woman—” 

“Think you already did that.” 

“—if she is under the impression that she can control my friends as well as my marriage?” 

“Look,” Elora said over them, appearing supremely unbothered by Jade physically wrestling Kit back into her chair. “I know you don’t like it and in all seriousness, I don’t care. You dug yourself this grave, lie in it.” 

Kit looked ready to yell again but Jade shot her a glance. Whatever Kit found in Jade’s stare made her lips tighten and she slumped. “Fine.” 

“Oh, wonderful!.” Elora ticked something off. “Now, you are both having dinner with the Hastur’s next Thursday, if that works with your schedule?” 

“That a question or a threat?” Kit snapped.

“It works.” Jade said firmly. 

“Fantastic, I knew it would!” Elora said. Jade was actually so impressed with the woman’s ability to smile through whatever this was. “And, I’m going to schedule your cake tasting for tomorrow, if that’s alright?” 

Kit didn’t even bother to respond.

“Yep, it works great.” Jade said. 

“Delightful.” Elora ticked something else off. “Okay, and lastly, I’m going to start hunting down designers for your wedding dresses, is there anything I need to look for in specific?” 

“No, whatever’s fine.” Jade said robotically, already thinking of the peace and quiet of her Toyota Corolla. 

Maybe she’d buy a bottle of something on the way home. 

Kit sat up. “Hold on, Jade doesn’t like dresses and my mom isn’t going to put her in one.”

Elora frowned and wrote something else down. “No, that’s fair. I’ll speak to her about it.” 

Kit relaxed back into her chair and spun away again. 

Elora snapped her notebook shut with authority and said, “I’ll see you two at seven a.m. tomorrow. Have a wonderful day.” 

The door shut with a click behind her, leaving suffocating air in her wake. 

Kit stopped her spinning with a foot on the table. Jade pinned her with a look. 

“Kit, what the hell.” 

Kit didn’t even have the decency to look a little bit cowed. “Hm?” 

Jesus.

“You know what I’m talking about.” 

Kit frowned. “No.” 

Jade stared at her, once again debating the pro’s and con’s of opening some sort of argument. Kit, eyes blazing defiantly, stared back. 

The irritation mounted and Jade said, “What exactly are you angry about right now? Because, I know you and this is not about some intern your mom hired.” 

Kit’s eye twitched. “You don’t know that.” 

“Jesus, Kit— I’m trying to help here.” 

Kit’s mouth twisted in a petulant frown and she said, “Well, I don’t need your help.”

At one point in time, Jade might have stayed and argued, but that point was long gone. She was mad that Kit had kissed her, mad that Kit was pushing her away, and frankly, mad that even the term best friends felt hollow now. 

Scorpia’s words felt apropos, and Jade hated it. 

There was a long moment in which Jade felt like screaming but instead, she took a step back, collected her things off of the ground, and said, “Okay then. I’ll see you for cake tomorrow morning.” 

It was a terrible, horrible feeling watching Kit’s face go blank. 

Kit let out a soft breath and said, “Fine. See you then.” 

Jade couldn’t look at Kit as she left the room, letting the door swing shut behind her.

Chapter Text

The morning was aggressively misty when Jade parked outside of Batter Up.

It was also cold as hell, but she figured she’d be inside most of the time anyway, so it didn’t matter. She forwent the jacket and locked the car behind her. 

When she’d received a text last night from Elora with just an address, the squat building in front of her was not what she’d been expecting. 

She could have done a halfhearted Google search. However, she’d spent the evening moping around in bed in a truly pathetic display of emotion, so that hadn’t happened. 

Batter Up was like if the Hobbits and The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills had, like, really raunchy sex but then both parties agreed midway that it was too weird and then they all retired to Montana. 

The door was a single pane of glass decorated with the decal of a real door. Jade pulled it open gingerly, already incredibly dubious. 

The little bell on the top of the door jingled frantically, and then, “Morning, babe!” 

Hm?

Kit strolled across the bizarrely farmhouse-looking slat floor in an oversize blazer and knee high boots. A red-glossed smile slashed across her face; all too garish in the foggy morning light. Her boots gave her just enough lift that when she wrapped her arms around Jade in the world's least expected hug, her reddened lips lined right up with Jade’s ear. 

“My mother invited the press— she wants to change the PR strategy. Elora told me that whatever we’ve been doing needs to be upped by a factor of ten if we want anyone to buy it.” Kit said quietly. She stepped back and Jade tried to understand what was going on the way she always had, by looking at Kit, but Kit’s face was unreadable. Her gaze wandered over Jade’s shoulder. She said, stiffly, “You say the word and I’ll walk out of here with you. I’m not going to make you do something you don’t want to do.”

Kit had already slipped on her armor; her press smile and that walk she did where her hips swung from side to side in a way that suggested she knew you were looking at her, and she liked it. Every shield was up, every defense mechanism was engaged. 

Jade, on the other hand, was a terrible actress. Through whatever cinematic twist, she’d received a healthy dose of media training simply via osmosis due to her relationship with the Tanthalos family, but she still didn’t feel entirely comfortable in crowds or on a stage. 

And then there was the fact that Kit wasn’t looking at her right now.

“What... um, what are we going to have to do?” Jade asked quietly. 

“Just hold hands and answer questions.” Kit said. “When we met, how long until the wedding, that sort of thing.” Kit glanced at Jade and said stoically, “I’ll probably have to touch you like this for longer, so if that’s not something you want...” 

A bitter, decisive battle was fought in Jade’s head. One side, the idiot side, said that if it would keep Kit’s hands running across Jade’s neck like they were right now, it was a worthy sacrifice to make. The other side, the head-screwed-on-right side, knew what a stupid, stupid idea it was. 

“Kit, I—” 

Kit’s expression changed like the flip of a coin. Her mouth furrowed and her eyes steeled further and Jade could practically see the gears moving as she charted their path out of the store.

Because that was the thing; no matter how angry Kit might be with her, Kit would still face a firing squad with a goddamn smile if it meant keeping Jade safe. 

Jade’s stomach hurt again.

Who kept Kit safe?

“It’s fine,” she said suddenly, and then guided by some sort of matrimonial instinct, she slipped her hand into Kit’s. Their fingers tangled together, stiff, but warm. 

“Okay...” Kit chewed at her lip and said, “You’re sure?” 

“Yeah.” said Jade. 

Kit’s megawatt smile powered up like stadium lights, blinding for a singular second, before she spun around and headed towards the back of the shop. Trying her best to make it look like she’d chugged the same brand of Calm, Confident, and Cool that Kit had, Jade followed. 

The front of the shop had housed a long glass display case of cakes, and several vintage creamery style tables and chairs. The back of the shop promised something more intimate. There were granite counters, 1950’s style appliances in various pastels, and a long table with ten innocently decorated cakes.

Elora stood to the side in a combatively pressed suit, scribbling into her notebook. Jade felt horrendously underdressed in her presence, in sports leggings and a gym sweatshirt, but this was supposed to have been simple cake tasting, not a tell-all with Oprah. 

Next to Elora, with an expression on his face that suggested he’d just caught Jade doing something particularly odd, stood a tall, thin man in a gray apron. 

“Maes Kesselring, sixth generation owner of this bakery, responsible for the name change, he’ll warm up. I think.” Kit said quietly, and Jade was constantly distracted again by Kit’s breath against the side of her neck.

“Mm.” she said intelligently. 

“Sarris, Falken!” Kit flipped a new switch and swanned forward, moving like she paid rent on the space. “I’d like you to meet my fiancée, Jade Claymore. Jade, this is Sarris and Falken from Elle. ” 

Jade shook hands, projecting confidence she did not have. The lights in the room reminded her slightly of the stage lights, and she rooted around in the pit of her soul for the last dregs of whatever stage presence she’d used that night. 

“Hey, guys.” she said, like a nervous teen boy. 

Yuck. 

“First time with the press?” Sarris asked, nodding sympathetically. He already had a notepad flipped open, and his pencil was poised as if whatever she was about to say next was going to be vital to the new piece. 

“Second, actually, but I sprinted away from the Sun reporters which hardly counts.” Jade said, eyeing the pencil as it started scribbling. 

Sarris laughed, but it wasn’t particularly kind. “I’d do the same. Now, why don’t you stand over here with Kit and I’m gonna get a shot of you guys trying the cake.” 

“ Ahem .” 

Maes wandered forward towards the table in the center of the room, where he leaned over to inspect the cakes. He ignored Sarris and Falkan completely. 

“We are in my temple now, my humble shrine to a God— well, not a God. I don’t believe in that— but to a magic we will never truly understand.” 

Elora was nodding like he was for sure speaking English. Jade’s feeling about the morning was not getting better. 

“We’ll start with the lemon and saffron sponge coupled with a mint reduction and a simple Italian buttercream.” Maes said absently. “A truly wondrous combination that should leave you with your tongue tingling and your mind alight with possibilities.” 

“Love that.” Sarris said. He tossed a sly smile towards Jade and said, “Speaking of possibilities, mind holding hands and doing some cute stuff for the camera. The readership loves cute stuff.” 

“Absolutely not.” Maes planted the large end of a spoon directly in front of Falken’s camera lens and said, “I insist we slice into the divine first, yes?” 

“We at least allowed to ask questions?” Sarris asked, frowning. 

“Go ahead.” Elora called from across the room where she was fetching a knife. She made direct eye contact with Jade and said loudly, “Ask away, gentlemen.” 

She was holding the knife rather menacingly, so Jade took a step closer to Kit. 

They were supposed to be selling this or whatever. Jade affixed her nerves with a grounding breath before sliding an arm around Kit’s waist. She could feel the heat of Kit’s body through the soft fabric of her blazer. Kit was stiff under her arm. 

Elora looked approving. 

“Fantastic. Love you two.” Sarris flipped open a new page and said, “So, Kit, I think everyone’s dying to know if you saw that proposal coming. I mean, you looked really overcome up there, it was honestly quite moving.” 

“It’d be more moving if she were trying cake right now.” Maes said waspishly. 

Elora shoved an ornate plate with a slice into Kit’s hands.

Kit smiled cheerfully as she took it. “I mean I wouldn’t say I was totally shocked, we’d obviously talked about potentially getting married one day, so it was definitely in the cards for us. But I will say, proposing to me and partnering with my favorite charity?” Kit leaned into Jade with a charming smile that was no more genuine than a plastic flower. Kit said sweetly, “No one knows you better than the one who loves you most.” 

Funny, that.

Jade swallowed on a dry mouth and said, “For sure, babe.” 

Elora shot Jade a look of malice and put a slice of cake into her hands.

“Yes, speaking of which, Jade, how did you decide you were going to be partnering with Trisha Davis? What was the motivation there?” Sarris asked, pencil scribbling furiously. 

“Well,” Jade said, swallowing again to try and get some saliva back onto her tongue in hopes that it might start working again. “I mean... Kit had spoken about them a lot— not, like, a lot a lot , but like, just in passing so I knew it was something she wanted to do— to partner with them, I mean. But whenever I was over at hers, she’d have all her shit spread on over her kitchen table and—”

“So you two aren’t living together right now?” Sarris asked curiously, a glint in his eye. 

Elora sliced the next cake with a steady hand, not looking at them, and Kit shifted slightly. Jade’s mouth got impossibly drier.

“Well, um, we weren’t living together at first but we’re going to move in. Probably.” 

Sarris mused for a second before settling on, “Traditional, I like it.” 

There was blood in the water now, and Jade had the sneaking suspicion it might be her own.

“The cake?” Maes reminded everyone. His spoon swung close to Falkan’s camera lens again and the camera was shifted pointedly out of the way.  

Jade used the excuse to shovel a massive slice into her mouth. It was terrifyingly sweet. Her right eyebrow twitched without warning. 

Jesus.

She was not going to gag. 

“My God, you’ve really managed to hold onto the moisture here.” Elora was saying. She took another small taste of the buttercream, moved it around her mouth like some sort of confectionary sommelier, and said, “Yep, see this is exactly how to do it. Falkan, Sarris, I insist you try some. I’m interested in your thoughts.” 

Jade was interested in breathing, which she was struggling to do on a dry mouth filled with what tasted like the remainder of Candy Land after the nukes hit. 

Jade wasn’t aware that anyone had noticed, but then Kit was somehow returning to her side with two glasses of water and a casual, “I went on a run down by the reservoir this morning, Sarris, and I’ll tell you, it’s just stunning in the morning.” 

Jade swallowed enough water to drown a fish, and finally felt better again. 

Elora gave her a second strong side eye. 

“Our next cake is a plum and orange variation on the classic Black Forest gateau.” Maes said, directing traffic with his spoon. Falkan grumpily moved his camera away again. Jade had a feeling Maes was doing it on purpose.

Sarris said suddenly, “Jade, how long exactly were you two dating before you decided to propose? I mean, you’ve been out of the public eye for the majority of your relationship, so the readers want a bit of a timeline, here.”

“Um,” Jade said, because they’d gone over this question a week ago at Sorsha’s behest, but for the life of her, she couldn’t remember. Kit’s fingers, which were still entwined with her’s, squeezed three times. “Uh, three years.” Elora’s face blanched, and Kit’s fingers pinched hard. Okay, maybe that hadn’t been a hint? “No, sorry, more like three months.” 

Kit’s hand tightened further. 

Sarris cocked his head, eyes glinting. “So, really, quite sudden then. I’ll tell you— that proposal shocked us all, and for a moment, there was speculation that it was some sort of media stunt.” 

Fuck... she was really fucking this up.

Elora, who was standing behind the reporters backs busy tuning out Mae’s drone about frosting varieties, was clenching her jaw. She shot Jade a warning look. 

“On that front, I notice you don’t even have a ring?” Sarris was saying slyly as he penciled in something else on the pad. “Is that for any particular reason? I mean, we’ve also been interested in where you got Kit’s ring from, it really is quite... unique .” 

He smiled. 

The offensively simple silver band on Kit’s ring finger glinted under the lights. 

And Jade still couldn’t lie to save her life. 

Kit laughed, stiff and cool, and Jade felt her body tense in preparation, frantically coming up with an answer that might patch up some of the holes Jade had just managed to rip in their story. 

But there was an answer floating before her, unwelcome and dreadful. 

Jade wouldn’t be able to lie her way out of this one, but she could tell the truth.

Or, at least, she could tell part of it. 

Okay.  

She took a breath out. 

Kit did this shit all the time. 

Jade smiled and pulled Kit in, pressing a kiss to the top of her head. She said, secretively, “Fine, I’ll be honest here. I didn’t particularly want it to come out like this, but yeah, my proposal was a little sudden.” 

Elora’s eyes narrowed. Sarris blinked. Kit twitched minutely again. 

Jade tried for an airy laugh. “I mean, it was the perfect moment, right? I’d been watching Kit working her ass off over this project for months— it was like we’d just had a kid, I swear— and then I managed to connect with Trisha Davis and so I thought to myself, this is it.” Jade smiled fondly down at Kit, which was far more natural than she wanted it to be, and said, “I just grabbed the ring off of one of those stalls out on the wharf, like, five minutes before we were due on stage. I mean, I’ve loved her for forever, so it didn’t really feel like I was making some sort of crazy decision.” 

There was a pregnant pause in which Jade overthought every interaction she’d ever had with Kit and whether telling her the truth would ruin everything. 

It probably would.

“Plus,” Jade added, to try and iron out the last crease. “If this is a media stunt, I’d hate to be the last to know.” She nudged Kit with a smile. “I mean, I was the one that did the proposing, after all.” 

Kit’s eyes were wide and blue when they stared up at Jade. They glittered like she knew something Jade didn’t.

“Like I’d shackle myself to you for publicity.” Kit said, teasing. She frowned, and said to Sarris like it was a secret, “You know, she makes me drink green smoothies in the morning.” 

Which was true, funnily enough, but it had only happened once . Apparently, Kit was taking the same partial-truth strategy. 

“They’re healthy!” Jade protested. 

“They’re designed for my own personal torment.” Kit said, sighing dramatically. “Speaking of health, we’ve got eight more cakes to get through here, folks.” 

Maes, who had started staring out the window, looked startled when everyone obediently turned to him. Recovered, he said imperiously, “I’d like us to move on to the classic vanilla, which I’ve paired with a tangerine jam and a chunky almond glace.” 

Everyone went for a plate. 

The opportunity fell into Jade’s lap a second later, and she felt slightly guilty because of how easy it was. 

“Come here.” she murmured. They’d moved on to some rhubarb and lychee monstrosity, and Kit had the smallest bit of cream on the corner of her red lips. 

It was cliché, at best. 

Kit turned her head, eyebrows furrowed, and Jade cupped her jaw, still buoyed by the bizarre boldness that she’d magically switched on. She felt Kit stiffen underneath her, and the quiet, rushed exhale on the back of her wrist.

Kit’s mouth was far more distracting than it had any right to be, Jade thought absently. It wasn’t particularly hard to run her thumb across Kit’s lips, which parted, surprised, under her finger. 

Only because she was physically holding on to Kit’s face did Jade feel the hitch in her breath. Kit’s eyes flashed. 

And because Jade was a classy bitch, she lifted her thumb to her mouth and pulled the cream off with her tongue. 

“Thanks, princess.” she said with a grin. 

The flush on Kit’s cheeks was particularly satisfying, a chink in the armor that Jade felt no small amount of delight at having opened. 

Across the room, Elora blinked. 

Falkan’s camera clicked. 

Boom. Nailed it. 

This shit was surprisingly easy. 

Which was just great, Jade thought, suddenly miserable. Was it going to be this easy when they were fake married, too?

They moved on to some berries and cream thing, and Kit pressed herself close to Jade. Her expression was now something fierce, challenging, and she held a strawberry like a threat.

Jade felt like she was in the ring. She stepped in. 

Kit’s eyelashes fluttered when Jade took a bite and she relished in the flash of surprise that crossed Kit’s face when she swallowed.  

Kit: zero.

Jade: one.

Or, two, if you were counting the whole finger-licking situation. 

The cameras clicked and Elora’s eyebrows were starting to furrow. 

Maes was saying something about frosting but Jade didn’t particularly care. She was winning, and it was fun. 

Jade held Kit’s waist as she leaned in from behind to taste a different frosting; Kit shivered slightly. Jade left a lazy hand on the back of Kit’s neck when she went back to her spot, kneading slightly, just enough to make Kit’s spine lengthen and her eyes narrow, glittering and bright. 

Kit retaliated by smearing a strip of gray-green icing on Jade’s cheek, and pulling her close by the chin to lick it off. 

It was bold and a lie and Jade loved it. 

This isn’t real... she tried to remind herself. It’s for the reporters. They had an image and fucking... PR or whatever...

Kit grinned handsomely when Jade paused to push Kit over to the sink to wash her hands and it was all forgotten.  

The cameras captured Jade’s teasing grins, the too-sincere kisses she pressed to Kit’s forehead, the brush of her fingertips across Kit’s shoulders while she reached for the water. 

At some point, they devolved entirely. Kit squealed and wiggled when Jade picked her up around the waist in an effort to get frosting on her face— how those two actions were related was anyone's guess at this point. Jade knocked aside a chair getting away from Kit’s hands, which were threatening all out icing warfare.

Sarris and Falkan looked equal parts confused and entertained. The pencil scribbled away and the camera clicked again. 

Maes looked like he’d been disassociating for the last hour, but Jade had a feeling that was just his face in general. 

“Right,” Elora said, after Jade and Kit were both far too messy for what was meant to be a cake tasting and interview session. “I think we’ll call it here for the day.” 

Sarris seemed delighted. He jotted one more thing down and said, “This was perfect, you two. I love to see it. You’ll be sent a complementary issue.” 

After escorting Sarris and Falkan out, Elora said to Maes, “Perhaps you could meet me in the front to take a look at the schedule? We’re also going to need smaller cakes for the rehearsal dinner, and I’d like to know what your timeline is.” 

The door shut behind Maes as he left the room and there was a sudden, cold silence that washed over the three of them. 

Kit, who had been holding Jade’s hand whilst she’d been speaking to Sarris and Maes, dropped it immediately and stepped away. Jade felt the loss like a slap.

She tried not to let it show on her face as the full force of her stupidity came rushing in. 

Fuck... what had she been doing?

“Well,” Elora said stiffly. “That was convincing. Nicely done.” 

It was hollow praise. Jade didn’t bother to look at Kit and instead crossed the room to wash her hands. 

Behind her, Kit said strangely, “Thanks. We’ll see you in a sec.” 

Elora closed the doors behind her and then it was just Jade and Kit and the carcasses of ten god awful cakes. 

“I didn’t really like any of those.” Kit said after a moment, apparently bored enough with the sound of the sink that she was willing to speak to Jade. 

“Neither.” Jade said, and then she returned to fastidiously removing shit from under her nails. 

The water draining into the pipes was quieter than it could have been, perhaps making room for the cavernous and irrepressible silence that threatened to consume Jade whole. 

She could feel it behind her.

She could feel Kit behind her. 

Kit cleared her throat. “We need to talk about yesterday.” 

Oh, for sure. 

They needed to talk about a lot of things, in fact. They needed to talk about whatever that had just been; the hitched breaths and the glittering eyes under the cheap disguise of fruit and cake. They needed to talk about their argument yesterday; Jade’s anger, Jade’s frustration, all things that were to be kept locked away at all costs. 

They needed to talk about Kit kissing her. They needed to talk about Kit kissing her instead of saying goodbye.  

Still not looking, Jade said, perhaps colder than she should have, “Oh, we need to, do we?” 

The silence yawned, wide and thunderous. 

Jade turned the sink off and the room grew oppressively quiet. 

When she spun around to face Kit, ready to angrily smash through whatever iced over exterior Kit was presenting, she was stopped short by the bizarre look on Kit’s face: fear, uncertainty, determination...

Kit had been shutting her out for a lot longer than a day now, and this was new.

It was a quick turnaround and Jade hadn’t had time to prepare.

“Kit—” she said cautiously. 

“I don’t want to be my mother.” Kit said quickly, which was a bombshell in and of itself. And then, quietly, earnestly, “I want to be a good wife, Jade.” 

I—

It was another punch to the gut. Jade didn’t know how to react. 

A good wife? 

Jade had never hated how much Kit cared about things, how much she threw herself into her projects. But right now, Jade could feel the anger again. It sloshed around inside her— putrid, tepid water— and reminded her as it slowly corroded her stomach, that perhaps it was not Kit she was mad at. 

Kit said, all shaky and rushed, “I’m not going to let myself be like... that, like her. Be rude to people and not apologize and take the respect and love and shit of those around me for granted. I wasn’t kind to you yesterday and I didn’t know why— well, I kind of know why, now— but I’m going to be more communicative going forward, I promise, I just don’t know... I don’t know how to say sorry yet— I mean, I can say the words, but I get all defensive and shit at first and I just— I know this is a lot, but if you’d stay with me while I figure it out...” 

Oh, my darling. 

Jade had already forgiven her years ago so she crossed the room and pulled Kit into her chest. Kit seemed small and cold and young all at once and Jade wanted to squeeze her hard enough to absorb her and put her somewhere safe for the rest of time. 

Because she could not, she only said, “Jesus, Kit— I’m with you. I’m always going to be with you. You don’t have to ask that kind of stuff.” 

And Kit said, half muffled by Jade’s hoodie, “Yeah, I do. One day, when you get tired of m— all this, I want to give you an out, you know?” 

She’d meant to say me.

Jade felt like laughing. Didn’t Kit get it?

Jade didn’t need an out. Or, an escape hatch, or an eject button, or some sort of parachute. 

This was it. This was the end of the line. There would be no one else whom she’d love as much as she loved Kit Tanthalos. 

But she couldn’t say all that, so instead she said, “You idiot, I’m not getting tired of you. I mean, it’s been like twenty years. If I wanted to get tired I would have done it a long time ago.”

Kit’s head poked up, meerkat style. She huffed. “Jade, that’s not—” 

“Hey, shut up, okay? I love you, and I’m not leaving.” 

Oh.

Hm. 

Fuck.

The worlds had slipped out before she could grab them by the tail, and there they were, a raw and bleeding wound made up of three bloody scratches. 

Jade’s breath stopped and for a long minute, she said goodbye to a lot of things. The list was extensive. She started with the first time Kit had ever held her hand.

But Kit only blinked, perhaps curiously— Jade still wasn’t able to read her like she’d used to— and said, slowly, shatteringly, “You’re my best friend, right?” 

Jade did laugh this time. It wasn’t a particularly happy laugh, but it was enough. 

Jade said, “Of course, Kit.” 

The words unsaid were breathed away.

Kit looked mollified, but her eyes were still searching Jade’s with a strange ferocity. She nodded after a while, and settled back against Jade’s front. 

Finally unwatched, Jade tilted her head back and stared bitterly at the ceiling. 

Scorpia was wrong. 

Jade could never hate Kit. 

But she could hate herself.

Chapter Text

“Jade!” Miles yelled from out on the floor. 

Jade rolled her chair back far enough to poke her head out of her office. 

Miles pointed at Kit, who’d just walked through the front doors of the gym. “Your wife is here!” 

Jade scowled through her traitorously fluttering heart. “How’d you hear about that? ” 

“My mom said— to her accounting friend Helen, I wasn’t supposed to hear, I think— but my mom said she thinks you’re gonna stop teaching because you’ve got a sugar mommy now.” 

For fuck’s sake—

Jade choked on a cough. “What.” 

“Do you even know what that means?” Kit asked as she slid her massive circular sunglasses away from her face and blinked owlishly at Miles. She had a duffle bag over her shoulder and was decked out in a tank top and the stupid tear-away sweatpants she’d bought in their last year of college. 

She looked glowy and all too perfect for Jade’s gym. Rude.

“Nope!” Miles said happily. 

“Awesome.” Kit grinned. “So basically, if you want to live a happy and stress free life, you need to find—” 

“—Oi, you.” Jade interrupted. She pointed at Miles and then pointed to the hanging bag in the corner. “You know where you’re meant to be right now, yeah?” 

Miles stuck his lower lip out but Jade made a face and he scampered off. 

“I thought you were all about educating the minds of the youth?” Kit asked. 

“Oh, for sure, it’s just that I want him to go to school and not spend five hours a day lurking around tanning salons and the stock exchange building.” 

Kit laughed and joined Jade in her office, throwing her duffle on the couch and collapsing into one of the chairs across from Jade’s desk with a massive groan. She dug a pill bottle out of her pocket and swiped the half-empty mug of protein shake off of Jade’s desk. 

“Long day?” Jade asked. 

Kit tossed back two Ibuprofen and nodded. “Had our first official meeting with Sidone. Wild shit went down in that boardroom, I’m telling you. They’re already trying to oversell the publicity aspect of it too much and I’m getting concerned that she thinks we’re just doing this for attention and— eugh! Jesus! What the hell is this?” 

Kit spat the drink back into Jade’s mug and looked at it cross eyed as if it was going to jump back out at her. 

“Day-old protein shake.” Jade said smugly. 

“And you just let me drink it?” 

“Thought it was gonna be funny.” Jade said, grinning when Kit looked at her incredulously. She said, “And I was right! Love when that happens.” 

“Some fiancée you are.” 

And there it was.

Jade let the silence linger for only a few seconds before she industriously cleared it away. They’d talked about it all enough.

“So,” Jade said as she leaned back in her chair. “What’s up?” 

Kit blinked at her.

“It’s the second Wednesday of the month.” Kit said. She frowned. “What do you think is up?” 

... sleepover night. 

“Ah, fuck!” Jade grimaced. “I forgot, I’m so sorry.” 

Kit shrugged and waved a hand. “No worries. We could go to mine if you’re not down for the usual?” 

“No, no...” Jade took a quick glance at her calendar, noted her last class, and said, “You’ll just have to mind the mess.” 

Kit snorted. “When have you ever cleaned for me?” 

Jade didn’t know how to say “Oh, Kit, my love, I clean every time you come over and it's just that you used to come over a lot so my flat was pretty much always clean but now you’ve not been over in a month— aka: since before I proposed to you— and the flat is basically in shambles.” without sounding weird. 

“Never, you wench.” Jade said, glaring. She tried, “I’ve just been busy. ” 

Kit laughed. “Fine. Also, my mom has had this on the calendar for ages but I realized, like, last night that you should probably come with me to the gala she’s having tomorrow evening.” 

Jesus.

“Tomorrow?” Jade asked. It was a classic Kit Tanthalos move to leave something like that to the last minute. She would have expected it had she known there was going to be something happening in the first place.

“Tomorrow.” Kit winced and said, “You can say no, of course. I can always assuage the press by saying my poor fiancée has been struck with the plague or some shit.” 

Like Jade would say no to Kit. She wondered if Kit knew that.

“... did you just use the word ‘assuage’ out loud?” she said instead.

“Read it in a book today.” Kit grinned. “Fun, right?” 

She looked so pleased that Jade felt it necessary to glare down at her calendar again.

She sighed. “Sure, I’ll come with. Now, read your book or whatever you’ve come here to do, I’ve got class.” 

“Actually, I was hoping we could talk more about scheduling...” Kit said hopefully. 

Jade squeezed her water bottle into her open mouth and strode for the door. “Outta luck, princess, see you on the flipside.” 

“Ugh.” Kit lethargically reached for her laptop and said miserably, “Yay, extra work time.” 

—

They left the gym a few hours later and drove back to Jade’s in their separate cars. Jade led the way up the stairs like she always did and for a second, it was three months ago and they were normal again.

But, she could feel Kit’s presence at her back like some sort of corporeal shadow and the illusion dispelled itself. 

They’d used to do this sort of thing at least once a week, but then Jade had proposed, and all of the sudden every second they spent together felt strangely tense. Plus, work had built up on both their ends and before they knew it, it had been a month. 

Jade flicked on the lights as they pushed through the front door.

She heard Kit gasp from behind her. 

“Yeah, wow , you weren’t joking, Claymore. There’s like a whole three socks on the floor over here and— oh my God!— is that an unfluffed throw pillow? Jesus, yeah, it’s an actual shithole—” 

“Fuck off.” Jade smacked Kit across the stomach, dodged the return punch, and threw her bag down on the table. 

Kit was still laughing when she pulled out her computer and said, “Enough chit chat—” (“There has been no chit chat,” Jade said, crossly. “Just bullying, so jot that down.”) “— we need to figure out the schedule here before Elora decides to go all ape-shit on me again.” 

“Finally admitting that you could have done better in that particular conversation?” 

Kit glared at the screen.

“I’d never. Anyway, we’ve got this gala tomorrow evening, and then we’ve got a venue meeting on Friday, and then there’s a budget vote on Friday as well— whoops, that’s just for me, sorry— “ Kit aggressively poked the space bar a few times. “...and then— Hah! You’re going to love this— I had a call with Elora yesterday evening in the spirit of camaraderie, and we’ve booked a coffee brunch with Graydon Hastur on Saturday. Of course, I told her she had to come as well because I refuse to suffer alone, so it’s an overall victory for us.” 

“I’ve got classes—” 

“On Friday from eight to twelve? Yeah, the venue meeting is in the afternoon, no worries.” 

Kit smiled smugly and Jade tried not to admit to herself that she thought it was cute.

“And Saturday—” 

“Yep, I’ve sandwiched the coffee in your twelve to five gap.” 

Damn.

Jade raised an eyebrow. “I’ve got a question: do you have my entire schedule memorized?” 

Kit flushed. “No.” 

Jade was silent for a long moment until Kit said, “Okay fine, I do, but you’re my finacée, Jade! It’s in the job description.” 

Oh.

Jade supposed it was.

She said, “But I don’t know yours.”

Kit sighed and waved it away. “Well that’s different. You don’t need to know mine. I’ve just got meetings and shit. Your job is the one we need to plan around— gotta keep you busy molding young minds and bodies over there.” 

That was a bit self deprecating, but overall, planning around Jade’s schedule was largely a selfless move from Kit, Jade thought. 

Jade cocked her head and considered Kit for a long moment. She said through a growing smile, “That’s awfully considerate of you, you know.” 

Kit reddened further and said, “Shut up.” and then when Jade wouldn’t stop smiling, “You’re the worst, I hope you suffer. Can we please DoorDash something and watch a movie now?” 

Jade laughed and let it go. 

The redness lingered on Kit’s cheeks and nose long after the food arrived. For some reason, Kit insisted they watch The Proposal . 

“Huh.” she said, when the movie ended. 

Jade raised an eyebrow. “What’s that supposed to mean?” 

“Well, Elora said we should watch it because— and I quote,— ‘ There’s an irony in there somewhere, Tanthalos, and I think you might be too thick to figure it out.’  Which is a) rude, and b) obviously a challenge.” 

“You’re telling me you’ve never seen The Proposal? ” Jade asked incredulously. 

Kit sighed and shook her head. “You’ve seen all the movies I’ve seen, idiot.” 

That was true; Sorsha did not endorse casual movie watching, which was yet another thing to add to the growing Sorsha Tanthalos Sucks list.

“Fair.” Jade said. And then, “So, what’s the irony supposed to be?” 

Kit stared blankly at the black TV screen for a long minute. “No fucking idea.” 

Media literacy was not Kit’s strong suit, Jade supposed. She got up to throw out the takeout containers while Kit turned off the TV. 

It was well into the night now, the apartment was mostly dark, and Jade realized how easily the time had passed. Somehow, in moments like this, when there were no expectations and no one staring over their shoulders, they’d relaxed back into what they’d always been: the people that knew each other best. 

When she returned to the couch, Kit was frowning at her phone screen. 

The little bubble in Jade’s chest popped. 

Kit turned the screen so Jade could see.

It was a news article, featuring a blown up photo of Jade getting out of her car at Kit’s office. A blown-up detail showed off her bare ring finger, and the title declared, ‘Sham marriage? Inside Kit Tanthalos’ fake relationship— is this Sorsha’s doing?” 

Jade’s stomach knotted. 

“Clickbait.” she said quickly. “We don’t need to worry about this.” 

Kit raised an eyebrow. “The press is ruthless, Jade. If this theory gets popular, we’re fucked.” 

She had a point because, more specifically, Kit was fucked by this. 

The irritating feeling of dread grew stronger in her stomach.

Jade gnawed at her lip. “Okay, look, we just need to get realer-looking rings and maybe be seen together in public more. The gala tomorrow will be a great place to do that.” 

“Yeah, but...” Kit paused for a moment as if she were weighing something heavily, which was weird for her, and then she said, “Look, I know I brought it up earlier, and I’m sorry to do it again, but I also think we need to be doing more PDA.” 

Oh, yeah, that old thing.

Jade had anticipated this, but hearing Kit say it aloud was a whole new monster. She felt uneasy, all of the sudden, or perhaps it was just the fluttering in her stomach that refused to cease.

Dread or something else?

“Like what?” Jade asked, cautiously. 

Kit was quiet.

The apartment was too dark, Jade thought, suddenly. She couldn’t see Kit’s face as well as she wanted to. She couldn't try and decipher every muscle twitch, every fleeting emotion.

She was desperate to know exactly what Kit was thinking— not an unfamiliar feeling as of late. 

Kit’s ears were flushing red again as she said quietly, “If I kissed you, would that be okay?” 

The apartment was dead silent. Somewhere in the walls, a pipe gurgled. 

“I—” 

Jade had been too slow. 

Kit laughed rigidly and said, “Never mind— I don’t even know what I— just don’t worry about it, I’m sure we could figure out some other ways to make it work. Just, like, lots of hugging and stage kisses and—” 

“You can kiss me.” Jade said suddenly and Kit froze. Jade cleared her throat and said, “Just like... a normal kiss, right?” 

“Right.” Kit said, hesitant or maybe just quiet.

“For the press and everything.” 

“Yeah.” 

“That’s fine.” Jade whispered. 

Why was she whispering? 

Kit eyed Jade, as if she was assessing something new, and said so quickly Jade almost missed it, “Maybe we should practice.” 

Practice? 

Practice... kissing?

Jade was pretty sure she’d had this exact dream at age fourteen, and it was particularly odd to have it play out at this late age in her life. 

With a lack of air typically associated with serious suffocation, Jade said, “Hm?” 

Kit’s eyebrows were pinched, and her gaze flitted around the room, but she said casually, “You know, to make sure it looks natural.” 

Fuck...

Did Kit have a point?

Kit had a point, Jade decided logically.

“Right.” Jade said, throat dry again. Oh, she was being stupid.  “Now? Or...” 

Kit’s tongue darted out to wet her lips, which was all too distracting considering the conversation they were having, and she nodded. “Yeah. Now.” 

They sat still for a moment in the dark— Kit’s phone had long since shut off and been abandoned somewhere in the blankets. 

Stupid. 

She was being stupid. 

Scorpia would have her head for this shit. 

But...

But Scorpia wasn’t here. 

And Jade’s common sense seemed to have taken a lengthy vacation as well. 

So Jade said, drawing on that same dwindling well of under-the-stage-lights confidence, “Come here, then.”

There was a weighty beat of silence and then Kit unashamedly twisted and threw a leg across Jade’s thighs so that she could sit on her lap. Their faces were suddenly inches apart. 

Oh.

Jade didn’t know where to put her hands. Kit’s waist seemed far too off-limits, and her hips seemed equally as bad. Jade eventually let them settle on Kit’s thighs, chastely just above the knee because apparently Jade reverted to convent life when she was under pressure. 

Kit’s eyes gleamed, catlike, in the streetlamp. She was glancing back and forth between Jade’s own darting gaze and Jade’s mouth like she couldn’t quite keep herself from looking.

Kit’s breath was heavy. Was she as panicked as Jade felt? As scared? As... excited ?

Jade could see each of Kit’s eyelashes, she could make out each individual freckle. She could see the little cut next to Kit’s eyebrow from getting in fights as a kid. 

The voices were back, reminding her how stupid of an idea this was. Stupid because they were best friends and stupid because this was a fake fucking marriage and stupid because Jade knew what Kit tasted like and she knew she was never going to get a second chance and—

Jade leaned forward and pressed her mouth against Kit’s.

It was warm, and soft, and gentle at first; they were kissing like girls who had never kissed before. Exploratory, curious, and hesitant all at once.

But then Jade pulled back and Kit followed, so Jade kissed her again like an idiot and Kit kissed her back and at some point, Kit’s hands found themselves in Jade’s hair, pulling Jade closer and closer, and Jade’s fingers were digging into the flesh at Kit’s hips, hard enough to bruise, and—

What the fuck was she doing?

Jade wrenched herself away, heart frozen cold in her chest. “I’m sorry, I—” 

Oh.

She’d fucked up.

She couldn’t explain herself— what she’d just done. 

Kit face flashed through too many emotions for Jade to parse through and suddenly she, too, was flying backwards towards the other end of the couch like she’d been electrocuted, saying, “Fuck, Jade, I shouldn’t have done that— I shouldn’t have suggested that.” 

Was she regretful, too?

Was regretful even the right word?

“No, no, it’s fine.” Jade’s hands were shaking and she felt oddly absent. 

She glanced over at Kit, half expecting disgust or anger, but Kit’s eyebrows were knit together and her mouth was turned down. Her hands fluttered around her bent knees like frantic butterflies.

“Jade...” she said, quietly. “I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean to... I didn’t realize you didn’t...” 

Sorry? Sorry?

Kit hadn’t done anything wrong, she’d just... 

Jade didn’t know anymore. 

“It’s fine.” Jade said, again, because she didn’t know what else to say. And then, softer, “We were just practicing, right?” 

And perhaps that was the wrong thing— Kit looked stricken. 

Jade pretended she couldn’t see the sudden pale sheen to Kit’s face. She turned away and busied herself folding the crumpled couch blanket. 

“Yeah.” Kit said and somewhere behind Jade, her weight shifted. Kit cleared her throat and said, “Cool, well, now we’ve done that so tomorrow night we’ll be able to... you know... look like a couple and everything.” 

Damn it, Jade.

Jade nodded stiffly. “Yeah.” 

Jade heard Kit stand and clear her throat again. With an odd tightness to her voice that Jade couldn’t decipher, Kit said, “Is it still fine if I stay here tonight?” 

“Sure.” Jade said, robotically. “I’m just going to clean up a bit. You can use the shower first, if you want.” 

It was all too stilted, too stunted again. The feeling of sheer idiocy , of absolutely pathetic levels of stupidity , were creeping in like a tsunami tide.

“Okay.” Kit said, and Jade heard her footsteps exit through the bedroom door. The shower switched on a second later. 

Jade fell back on the sofa and buried her face in her hands.

Jesus...

The lingering feeling of Kit’s warm lips against her own was significantly hindering any real critical thought, so Jade marched into the kitchen to get herself a ‘ calm-the-fuck-down ’ glass of water. 

Practice? Who the fuck practiced kissing ?

(On that note, who the fuck got into a pretend-fake-marriage-situation with their best friend.

Best not to dwell.)

Jade chugged a glass and a half before her brain spun back up to speed and she remembered the panic on Kit’s face. 

Kit raged like a wild animal, she was as unabashed and unashamed as a winter storm. She just did things, as if it was what she was meant to do all along. She was heedless of others... but never heedless of Jade. 

The night Jade had proposed, Kit had asked if Jade regretted it, or if Kit had made her feel like Jade needed to save her in some way.

The answer was ‘no’, of course, but the fact that she’d asked at all was telling. 

So, why had Kit done... it? All of it. 

Why had Kit kissed her before she’d attempted to leave? So Jade wouldn’t have the time to ask questions? Why had Kit kissed her just now and then apologized? 

It was unlike Kit to take back or regret the things she’d done. 

Jade wondered, for the first time, if Kit was toeing the same line as her. 

It made her laugh a little and she stifled it into the water glass.

No.

It was a nice thought though.

The thing was, if Kit felt the things that Jade felt, Kit would have done something by now. Kit moved in giant steps and absolutes, and there was no way she’d be content to live in the odd gray space that Jade had occupied for pretty much all of their friendship. 

Jade washed and dried the glass in a weird fugue state and only when she was standing in front of her bedroom door did her stomach intestines squirm furiously.

So... were they just going to ignore it? 

Her hand nearly at the doorknob, Jade felt something bitter stab through her chest.

She couldn’t and she wasn’t sure she wanted to watch Kit’s cheerful smile and bright eyes come back to life as whatever they’d just done was washed innocently from her priority list. 

She wasn’t sure if she wanted to feel so... used again. It felt like a stupid word, but at the same time...

Jade’s hand dropped to her side and she turned back to the kitchen. She grabbed a stack of post-its from the drawer and a Sharpie.

The shower was still running as she wrote and Jade closed the front door quietly behind her.

—

It was a small miracle that Scorpia was still awake at three in the morning. 

She opened the door with a premade glare already plastered across her face. 

“Oi, what .” she barked, before her frown unknit itself and she said, softer, “Hey, you good, J?” 

Jade tried to nod but her neck muscles refused to work. She tried for a shrug, but to her humiliation, her shoulder muscles appeared to have gone on strike too. 

“I—” she said, but that was as far as she got before the tears welled in her eyes and her words were stuck fast in her throat. 

Scorpia’s face was thunderous, but Jade knew her sister. 

“Get in here.” Scorpia said, and Jade was bundled inside. 

Chapter Text

Jade rolled over on the sofa, squinted against the morning light, and despaired at the distinctly sick feeling in her stomach. Given that there was only one side of the sofa, it being the wrong side was a serious possibility. 

The sick feeling could have been a number of things. She’d not eaten in a whole ten hours, she was still in her jeans, the air smelled of chai and cat food; it could have even come from kissing her best friend and then leaving in the middle of the night. 

Honestly, anything. 

It also could have been the presence of one Thraxus-Relaxus-Boorman, who’d already perched himself in the armchair opposite her. 

“The chickadee has flown the nest, I see.” Boorman said magnanimously, a steaming cup in hand as he gazed pensively out the window. 

God.

“I’ve not flown anything, dumbass.” Jade said, rolling onto her other side and wrapping the blanket tighter around her. 

“Oi, relax.” Boorman held up a commanding hand. “It’s just a girl.” 

Jade groaned loudly. 

From the door, Scorpia said, “Love the energy, babe, but Jade actually happens to orbit around Kit so...”

Jade groaned again and rolled herself further into the covers, stuffing her face in between two of the couch cushions. 

She heard Scorpia set something down on the table and then cross the room. 

“Speaking of which,” Scorpia said. There was a creak as she dropped into a chair. “You going to tell me what happened last night?” 

“Yeah.” Boorman said pettily and even though Jade couldn’t see him, she could picture the exact pout of his lips which drove her up the wall and had somehow driven her sister into love. Insane. “I’ll hope you know my eye bags are due to you.” 

Someone smacked someone else. 

Jade swallowed the brick in her throat and said, as stoically as she could manage into the darkness of the cushion, “We kissed. I left.” 

A deafening silence. 

“What?” Scorpia said. 

Jade rolled back around, scowling as the sun assaulted her eyes again. 

“She kissed me. Well— I kissed her technically... or, we really kissed each other, we needed to practice it apparently... for this gala thing... or whatever— either way, we ended up kissing and I just couldn’t— like, I don’t know what she felt and I don’t know if I can do that without—” 

“Jade.” Scorpia put her own mug down on the table and leaned forward. “Are you kidding?” 

Trying not to feel hurt, Jade said, “No?” 

Gesturing dangerously with the hand holding the cup of chai, Boorman said, “Sorry, a girl went: ‘ Hey, Jade, let's practice kissing each other.’ And you said: ‘sure’ . And then you kissed and you still don't know how she feels?” 

“We’re in a marriage of convenience!” Jade snapped. “And if it doesn’t work out, Kit’s career is fucking shot. This is the sort of thing you have to practice!” 

Boorman dissolved into laughter. 

“So, what, a simple kiss on the cheek isn’t going to do it for the reporters? Do they need a fucking sex tape?” Scorpia said, leaning over and smacking Boorman again. 

Boorman batted her hand away and said smarmily, “I’ll bet you ten bucks that Kit’s gonna say, ‘Hey, Jade, just for the press, can we practice being fully and completely in love just for fun?’ ”

Jade was ready to scream.

“You don’t get it.” she snapped. “This isn’t some sort of scenario that some higher power has manufactured just to watch us do a tense little song and dance together. This is real fucking life, okay?” 

Boorman nodded seriously. “And in the spirit of ‘real life’, you then ran away in the middle of the night?” 

“I’m well aware I messed up.” she said acidly. “And I’m also well aware that leaving wasn’t the most mature course of action.” 

“I speak only the truth, little Scorp.” Boorman raised his hands. “And the truth is that you need to tell her—” 

Tell her?

Tell Kit?

“Tell her what? ” Jade said. She snorted. “Tell her that I love her? Let’s play that out: sure, she might feel something back, but what if, Boorman, what if she doesn't? What if she gets scared and runs— a distinct possibility because this is Kit we’re talking about.” 

Jade bit angrily at her cheek to keep her lips from trembling again. She would not cry over this. 

Boorman let out a breath. 

“Then you lose her.” Scorpia said into the silence. When Jade shot her an incredulous stare, she shrugged and said, “It will hurt for a while, probably for a long while, but with time you’ll heal and in the meantime, you’ll live. Not on the knife-edge of ‘ Oh, what if she knows?’ or ‘Oh, I love her but she doesn’t love me’ — but, like, actually live. For yourself, for once.” 

Jade bit down hard on her tongue and it started to bleed.  

Was Scorpia right?

Probably. 

Fuck.

As kids, she and Kit had been this inseparable duo. Kit started shit with people and Jade put bandaids on her cuts and ice on her bruises. They’d spent more time at each other's houses than at their own. Kit had learned to braid Jade’s hair and Jade knew that Kit liked coffee, always got the same chicken chow-mein from Chef Chu’s, hated the color gray because it was “literally the least interesting of all of the colors, I mean, there are so many to choose from, and gray? Really? —” .  Kit charged through the world with intention and purpose and Jade had never wished for a single second to find a way out of her wake. 

So who exactly was Jade without Kit?

Jade sure as fuck didn’t know. 

But instead of saying all that she said, “Kit’s... she’s my best friend. I just can’t take that risk.” 

It sounded robotic and fake and Scorpia frowned, her head cocked as she examined Jade from the other side of the room. When she’d arrived at whatever conclusion she’d meant to get to, she said, “Okay, I get it.” 

And Jade felt more disappointed in herself than she ever had before. 

“I don't.” Boorman said mulishly. 

Scorpia patted him on the arm as she got up and walked towards the kitchen. “And let's hope you never do, darling.” 

“Love it when she calls me that.” Boorman said with a grin, following Scorpia’s exit with adoring eyes. 

Yuck.

“Hey!” Jade called over the back of the sofa, “I have a gala tonight with her so can you do my eyeliner? Oh— can I also borrow that blue suit you have?” 

Scorpia slammed a pot down. 

—

‘Still coming?’ Kit had texted. 

Jade had said, ‘Yeah, of course. Be there in 15. ’ And then: ‘I’m so sorry for leaving last night, I just needed a second.’  

Kit had left her on read for twenty whole minutes before saying: ‘dw abt it. see you soon.’  

Now, Jade stood just inside the gala hall, trying not to choke on the palpable scent of the perfumed corporate agents marching around her and tugging on the slightly too-long sleeves of her jacket. The room was fucking gorgeous— Sorsha might be the devil but she had seriously outdone herself again with hanging tapestries and bonsai tree features. People in cocktail dresses and suits strolled around smelling like Chanel and alcohol, with plastic smiles and charming, trained laughter. 

“Jade, right?” 

Jade tried not to whip around too quickly. 

Graydon Hastur approached in a cleanly tailored plum suit, his hair curled and glossy around his head like a crown, looking far more comfortable than he had the last time she’d seen him. He looked at home, and it was off putting.

“Uh, yeah.” Jade said stupidly. She held out her hand. “You’re Graydon.” 

Jesus, she wasn’t selling this well. 

“Well, I should be.” he said, strangely serious, as if there was a significant possibility that he wasn’t Graydon Hastur. He turned slightly to the right and, facing the room, said, “I never thanked you.” 

Not what she’d expected. 

“Thanked me?” Jade said.

In the corner of her eye, a flash went off and she turned to stare. The group of press confined to the foyer like animals in a cage stared back. 

Graydon coughed lightly. 

“Don’t look at them, it makes us look like we’re doing something we shouldn’t be.” 

“We’re not, though...” 

“I’m aware.” 

“Oh.” 

Jade turned back towards the room and tried her best to ignore the barrage of cameras. At her side, Graydon straightened out and said casually, “This is probably really bizarre for you.” 

It was the second unexpected thing he’d said and Jade couldn’t help but laugh. “Yeah, you’re not exactly what I remember.” 

Graydon said, “I meant more the galas and the cameras and the questions; rather,” He smiled at her like they were sharing some sort of inside joke.”...the life you’re a part of now.” 

Oh. 

“It is, I guess.” Jade said, stilted. Then, “What exactly are you thanking me for?” 

Graydon waved at someone across the room, relaxed and casual. Jade envied him.

He said, “You know, I didn’t want to marry Kit. We both would have been miserable, first of all, and second— this might be rather funny— but I’m a believer in true love, unfortunately.” 

“Yeah, unfortunate.” Jade said dryly. She tried to affect the same easy-going posture, but still felt stiff and uncomfortable. “So then how do you do...” She gestured vaguely. “...all of this if you’re a believer in true love? I mean, is corporate networking not the literal definition of fake-ass bullshit?” 

Graydon’s face broke into a smile— something that at least looked genuine.

“It is.” he said finally, shrugging a little. And then, again, as if she knew what he was talking about, “But one must choose between boredom and suffering, don’t you think?” 

She really didn’t.

Jade raised an eyebrow. “I think ‘suffering’ is a bit dramatic.” 

“Oh, me too.” Graydon said, nodding seriously. “But while the quote is a bit too magnificent for the moment, I do think Kit and I have the same idea when it comes to this sort of stuff. We’re privileged little shits, I won’t deny that, but we’re not our parents and when they give us the keys to the castles they’ve built on blood and death and toil, we can do whatever the hell we want with them.” 

That was a whole two swear words, which was really humanizing the guy. She didn’t really get the rest of it.

Kit might have, Jade thought, with a twist in her gut.

“You really do sound like Kit.” Jade raised an eyebrow. “You also take an economics course in college that made you reevaluate capitalism?” 

“I majored in economics, actually.” Graydon said, and then with a wry smile, “Not that I enjoyed it much. More of a philosophy and linguistics person myself.” 

Jade nodded. “And I suppose not following your passions is another drawback to the lights-camera-action life?” 

“Not really, I went back and got a Ph.D. in philosophy two years ago.” 

Jesus.

“And you still believe in true love?” Jade asked, grinning. 

“Touché.” 

In the silence, Jade thought to herself how strange and interesting of a man Graydon was, and how absolutely fascinating it would have been to watch him and Kit attempt marriage.

Emerging from a door across the room, Elora spun in a panicked circle, caught sight of Jade, and made a beeline for her. And then, practically in slow motion, Jade watched as Elora caught sight of Graydon and rethought all of her life’s decisions. In a split second, she considered turning around, but then steeled herself and continued forward with a growing blush on her cheeks and a firm set to her mouth. 

Oh-ho.

Interesting.

“Jade.” Elora said as she approached and halted directly in front of them. She nodded in Graydon’s direction. Softer, she said, “Graydon.” 

“Elora,” he said, a small smile playing at his lips. “I am become a poet.” 

Elora flushed a deep red. “The name for the desire and pursuit of the whole.” 

“The Symposium?” 

“Have either of us really changed?” 

Holy shit , Jade thought emphatically, wishing desperately Kit were here to witness this. They were having a nerd-off. A flirtatious nerd-off.

“You two know each other?” Jade asked, almost crassly interrupting the sickening way the two of them were staring at one another. 

Elora seemed to come to her senses, and still colored a vibrant red, turned to Jade and said, “Oh, yeah, Gray and I met at Harvard in a philosophy class. We’ve not seen each other in... what?”

Of course she went to Harvard.

“Five years.” Graydon said, “But it is the time you have wasted for your rose that makes your rose so important, is it not?”  

Fuck yeah.

“Gray?” Jade asked Elora instead, raising an eyebrow. 

Elora’s eyes widened as if she was surprised Jade had noticed the blatant attempts of two absolute bone deep dorks attempting to court in front of her. 

“That’s just a nickname. We’re friends.” she said quickly, and then suddenly, as if she’d just remembered something, “Also, Kit’s here. Through the far door over there and then the third door down on the left. You should probably go get her. Prepare yourself.” 

Oh, this was too good.

Jade would have laughed out loud but she had too much respect— and a healthy dose of fear— for Elora to do that. 

Instead, she left Graydon and Elora behind to continue their bizarre romance to find Kit. 

Kit.

Kit who she’d left.

The sick feeling was back like it had never left. 

Traversing the crowd was like trying to find her way through a pod of polite dolphins. By the time she reached the door, the words ‘excuse me’ had numbed her lips. 

She pushed her way through and found herself in a hallway. She counted three doors down and opened it. 

“Kit, I want to appo—” 

Kit, in billowing blue sleeves, a goddamn floor length cape, and Armani oxfords, leaned her head back on the chaise lounge and said through a red-wine stained mouth, “Oh, hello my darling betrothed.” 

Jade had a few thoughts. 

First of all, everyone was using big fucking words tonight and she wasn’t going to be doing that. 

Secondly—

“You’re drunk?” 

“Don’t act so surprised.” 

Jade closed the door gently behind her, and locked it. She strode across the room.

“Kit, we’re at your mom’s gala— you can’t just get drunk. And where the hell did you get a bottle of wine from, anyway?” 

“Paid a waitress four hundred dollars to leave it in here.” 

Fuck.

“Seriously, Kit, really.” 

Her fingers wrapped daintily around the neck of the bottle, Kit raised it to her lips and took a long swallow. Her throat flexed and her eyes, locked on Jade, glittered.  

“Seriously.” she said.

Jade tried to breath and found her mouth dry again.

“Kit—” she said, hoarsely. “What’s going on.” 

Kit arched an eyebrow.

“You left. You left last night.” 

And Jade had, hadn’t she. There wasn’t an excuse in the world she could give save for the truth and there was no way... especially not now.

Kit leaned her head back again and sighed deeply. “It’s whatever, though.” 

“Kit, I’m sorry.” Jade said and she wanted to scream at herself because what exactly was she going to say here? “I... I just didn’t know what—” 

“Oh! No, no!” Kit laughed, a wretched butterfly of a thing that crashed to the floor and made Jade’s chest hurt. “Don’t apologize, seriously. It’s totally fine.”  

It wasn’t, though. 

It wasn’t fine.

“Kit—”

“Jade, baby , we’re friends and honestly, I’m sorry I pushed it like that. I won’t again, don’t worry.” 

Oh.

Jade focused on blinking. It didn’t distract her from the suffocating crush as her lungs failed to draw a full breath and her heart failed to beat. 

Oh. 

Oh, this was too much. 

Because she didn’t want Kit to not do it again. She wanted Kit to kiss her until the sun set and then all through the sunrise as well. She wanted to hold Kit and feel the heat of her skin and the beat of her heart and...

And she was selfish.

And she was wrong. 

And she was using this closeness to fulfill some sickening fantasy that she had of loving her best friend.

But—

The rope was fraying. 

“I needed space.” she breathed. “I needed space because I was afraid I’d done the wrong thing.” 

The air in the room stilled slightly and Jade could fucking smell her lies on the wind. She wondered if Kit could too. 

She held her breath.

Kit’s head moved up languidly until she made eye contact with Jade again. 

“What do you mean?” she said tonelessly. 

“I worried that... that it wasn’t the perfect performance.” Jade whispered, but it echoed as loud as thunder in the room, in the charged space between them. “That I’d disappointed you and all I’ve ever wanted to do is make you happy, Kit. I’m your—” 

Kit sat up fully and put the wine down. She leaned forward, rested her forearms on her knees, and cocked her head. 

“—I’m your best friend.” Jade’s voice cracked and she flexed her fingers into the folds of her pants. “I wanted it to be right.” 

Kit chewed at the inside of her cheek. 

“Want to sit?” she said after a while.

Jade nodded mutely and walked over. She tried not to breathe too deeply the smell of the cologne Kit had been wearing since they’d been in college. It was a familiar scent now. 

“Can I have some wine?” she asked.

“Go ahead.” Kit said.

It buzzed pleasantly on the way down and eased the tightness in her chest. Jade tried hard not to find comfort in that.

“Did you lock the door?” Kit asked, leaning back again. She was staring at the ceiling as if something about the crown molding was particularly interesting. 

The bottle froze halfway to Jade’s mouth.

“I did.” Jade said quietly.

Kit rolled her head lazily to stare at Jade from behind bronze colored eyelids. Her eyes were startlingly blue, but Jade had always known that. 

Jade’s traitor heart fluttered. 

“You were worried it wasn’t perfect?” Kit asked. “What... that it wouldn’t convince anyone?” 

Jade took another hurried swig. “Yeah. That’s what I was worried about.” 

Kit was silent for a beat.

“And so... you left me alone at your apartment?” she asked, an eyebrow raised now. 

“I was...” Jade put the bottle down, if only to give her something to do. “I was really worried.” 

Kit snorted and resumed staring at the ceiling again. 

In the silence, Jade tried to relax. It didn’t work. The wine was making her wired for some reason. Or, maybe it wasn’t the wine. 

She didn’t fucking know anymore. 

“Break it down for me, then.” Kit said, unhurried, and despite the fact that she wasn’t looking at Jade, there was a challenge in those words. “What would you do differently? How would you make it perfect?” 

Their knees were touching, their thighs were pressed together. Kit’s hands were folded across her chest, one painted finger digging a crescent into her skin, right next to a freckle. 

So Jade said, “I’d kiss you still. I’d just sell it better. I’d hold your face, run my thumbs across your cheeks. Make it look real.”

The words burned on the way out. It felt nice. 

Kit didn’t look. 

“You’ve got such soft skin; I’d want them to know that, to see that.” 

Her own cheeks were flushing horribly but she couldn’t take her eyes off of Kit, who still wasn’t looking. 

“Go on.” Kit said, relaxed. Her outline was reminiscent of a Greek god, drowned in fabrics, slouched romantically across an altar, ready and begging to be worshiped.

Jade’d had volunteered years ago.

“I’d...” Jade let her closer finger trail down Kit’s arm absently. Kit’s eyes closed and then opened purposefully. Her chest didn’t rise and fall. “I’d touch you like this, probably.” 

Jade allowed the finger up and across one of Kit’s collarbone, dancing over soft skin and freckles and a tiny bruise from last week. She tapped into the hollow of Kit’s throat. “I might kiss you here.” 

She felt Kit swallow under her touch and for a brief moment, she imagined Kit’s red mouth wrapped around her fingers, her warm tongue pressing in between them. 

Jade’s body warmed.

“Where else?” Kit breathed. 

Jade leaned over and braced an arm across the sofa behind Kit. She was close enough now to kiss Kit if she wanted to. 

She wanted to. 

Instead, she traced a line to Kit’s other shoulder. “Here.” 

“Oh?” Kit’s voice was shaky. Something in Jade’s chest boiled. 

She brought her finger across to Kit’s heart, so close to the swell of Kit’s breast. “Here.” 

Jade could feel Kit’s skin through the silk of her shirt. The buttons marched in a teasing line down her sternum and towards her waist.

Jade was getting distracted.

Kit hummed, her own fingers digging into the chaise. 

Her cheeks were flushed an appetizing peachy color. Jade wondered if they tasted so. She realized too late how close her mouth had gotten. 

“I’d say, ‘Come here, love.’ in front of all of those cameras...” Jade’s nose touched the skin of Kit’s cheek and slid down towards her ear. “...and put my arms around your waist when I kissed you. You’d let me kiss you then , right?” 

“I would.” 

Oh, Jade thought horribly. She was gone for this woman.

“Would you now?” she asked— she begged.

Kit turned her head and put her mouth on Jade’s.

She tasted like wine. Kit tugged Jade closer and Jade went willingly, kneeling with a knee in between Kit’s thighs and her hands bracketing Kit’s face.

She dragged her thumbs across Kit’s cheeks and yeah , they were as soft as she’d imagined. 

Kit’s skin was slightly salty, warm and human under Jade’s tongue. She worked her way down to Kit’s neck and bit there, the soft, gentle places she’d touched seconds ago turning bruised and red under her teeth. 

Beneath her, Kit let out a breathy gasp and dug a hand into Jade’s hair. 

“Jade.” she breathed, her other hand wrenching the buttons of her shirt open with frightful efficiency. “Jade... please.” 

It was perhaps... unfair how good Kit Tanthalos looked unbuttoned and half-ravished, her lipstick smeared and her shirt in a state of absolute disarray. Jade, because she was a simple woman, didn’t take the time to appreciate it. 

She moved on to Kit’s boobs. 

Kit made soft noises when Jade pressed a kiss against Kit’s nipple, and she did something of a moan or a laugh when Jade blew the gentlest breeze across her chest. Jade found it frightfully endearing. 

She did it again and Kit whined, “ Jade ,” but wouldn’t stop giggling. She kept laughing when Jade hauled her up by her waist and deposited her on her back. 

Jade kissed her again and when Kit bent her knee and pushed it in between Jade’s legs, Jade stifled a groan into Kit’s mouth. 

They weren’t speaking, Jade thought suddenly. They weren’t speaking because if they did, the reality might find its way between them and this wouldn’t be—

Someone hammered on the door and they froze. 

“Kit?” Elora yelled. “Kit, are you okay? The door’s locked!” 

Jade allowed a single second for them to share a panicked look before she sat up and hauled Kit up as well. 

“I’m fine!” Kit called back as they stumbled up. “I just... fell asleep. Give me a sec!” 

Oh, hm...

She was slightly tipsy, Jade decided as the room did a little wiggle. 

That was not good.

Kit ruffled her hair and then stared at the torn off threads where buttons used to be. She looked at Jade with an expression so startled it was almost comical. 

Jade popped off the remaining three buttons and said, “Tie it.” 

They weren’t looking at one another now. Jade wondered if she would leave with Kit. There was no way Elora wouldn’t know —

Kit appeared at Jade’s elbow. 

“Hold my hand.” she said, quiet and firm. 

Jade swallowed. They needed to talk about this—

“Hold my hand.” Kit said, and they tangled their fingers together and headed towards the door. 

“Thank fuck!” Elora barked as it swung open. “Your mom’s going crazy, we’ve up and lost Jade, and— holy fuck you two, Jesus Christ.” 

Jade didn’t doubt that they’d not done a good enough job.

“It’s my fault.” Kit said quickly, holding her head imperiously. She said, “I tripped.” 

“You tripped? ” It was scathing. Elora went for her bag, and yanked out a tube of lipstick and a makeup wipe. “Did you both trip into a bottle of wine then? Trip into a horizontal position on the couch? At what point in your fall did you lose your fucking buttons, Kit?” Elora turned her glare on Jade. “Thanks for that, by the way.” 

“No, that one actually was actually her.” Jade said, wiping under her eyes with the makeup wipe and submitting herself to Elora’s concealer covered fingers. 

“Traitor.” Kit said without venom. Jade could see her biting back a smile while Elora’s back was turned. It made her smile as well which earned her a poisonous glare from Elora. 

“Jesus, you two look an absolute state .” Elora snapped as they marched back down the hallway. “I’m not paid enough to deal with this. Jesus, what the hell is everyone going to think? You know, babysitting two horny fucking teenagers was not in the job description—”

Kit shot a look at Jade and for a second, they were kids again being scolded by whichever teacher had caught them doing something stupid. 

Jade stopped herself from laughing by saying, “Did you know that Elora and Graydon are in love?” 

Kit rocked to a halt and slapped a hand over her mouth. “No fucking way.” 

It really was the funniest piece of news. Jade knew Kit was going to react like that. 

Bingo.

Elora spun. “Sorry, are both of you drunk?” 

Jade shook her head very convincingly and Elora looked like she might toss at least one of them— if not herself— out a window. 

“For fuck’s sake.” Elora said passionately, and then her phone was out. She barked, “Lori. I’m going to need a car around back.” and shot them a significant look. She twirled her finger in the air in a ‘turn around you brainless idiots’ way.

Jade and Kit, the brainless idiots in question, turned around and hauled ass down the corridor. At some point, one of them broke into a jog.

Sorsha had rented out a museum. Now, the display cases had their lights on, constellations in the darkness that they were dashing through. 

Behind them, Elora hollered, “Take a fucking right you idiots, and go out the back door or so help me God I will slaughter both of you in your sleep!” 

Kit laughed so Jade laughed and they ducked through a doorway. 

Later, when they’d collapsed into the back of the tinted-windowed car, Jade realized that they’d not stopped holding hands. 

Her heart fluttered but that was fine. The drunken haze was wearing off slightly, but the fact that they’d have to deal with this in the morning wasn’t bothering her anymore. 

“Come back to mine?” Kit said.

Jade looked at her. Kit looked back. 

Whatever Kit found in Jade’s face wasn’t enough.

Kit said, “To sleep.” 

Oh.

Jade nearly laughed again, but it felt mean this time. “Sure.” 

And it might have been her, but it also might have been Kit, who dropped the other’s hand. 

Chapter Text

They needed to talk.

Holy shit, they needed to talk. 

Jade’s phone sat, untouched, on the arm of the couch, more like a time bomb than a device she used daily. The sun was barely over the horizon, gold fingers skimming the edge of Kit’s living room. Jade had watched it rise through heavy eyelids.

She was tired, so fucking tired. 

Kit’s apartment was a masterclass in how to disguise concrete and sharp corners. Where the architect had clearly gone for minimalism, Kit had put up neon shag carpets and kitchen chairs with mismatched patterns. Loud art covered nearly every inch of wall, and the corner of the room was taken up entirely by a small palm tree. 

The couch Jade had been lying on for the last six hours, sleepless, was practically radioactive in color, and far too squishy to be ergonomic.

Her back ached, her mouth was dry, and she simultaneously wanted to storm into Kit’s bedroom to deliver a speech on exactly why everything they were doing was wrong and run the opposite direction as fast as possible. 

She made coffee instead and pointedly avoided the closed door on the other side of the room the way you’d ignore a black hole from your space ship. 

The situation was a mess. 

Did Kit have, like, feeling-feelings for Jade? Or was it just ill-timed Kit appropriate confusion? 

Or, what if Kit was just messing around? What if Kit didn’t understand exactly how seriously Jade was taking all of this? And sure, Kit was gay, but did she understand that what they were doing wasn’t exactly ‘best girlie friends’ shit anymore?

Like, sure, hugging? Potentially platonic. Making out on the sofa? Eh... stretching that boundary a little bit.

Jade had poured a second mug before she knew what she was doing. She put it on the breakfast bar and marched back towards the couch. 

Click.

The sound of the door opening stilled every bone in her body. She shook herself loose in time to see Kit emerge from the doorway.

She was not going to get distracted. They needed to have a conversation. 

Kit’s hair was a mess and she had dark circles under each eye. Her gaze was already glued on the couch and when she saw Jade, her face flickered with something strange. Guilt? Anger?

Fear?

Jade didn’t fucking know. 

“Morning.” Jade said, voice hoarse.

“Hi.” Kit said after a beat. 

“I made you coffee.” On accident.

Kit nodded and then, oddly furtive, crossed the room to grab the cup. She stared out the window as she drank. 

Oh, no. No, no. 

That wasn’t going to work. 

“Kit.” Jade said— firm, rational, in control. Kit didn’t move. Jade grit her teeth. “We need to talk about last night.” 

The apartment grew so still and so silent Jade could pick out individual cars rolling by on the street. In the tranquility of the morning, it almost felt like they’d entered some sort of liminal space. 

Silently, Jade begged for something ... anything from Kit. 

But Kit breathed, “Oh. That.” and continued looking out the window. 

Something hollowed out in Jade’s stomach. 

Excuse me?

“Really?” Jade said. 

“We kissed.” Kit waved a hand over her shoulder. “So what.” 

So what?

So what?

So what that it meant everything to Jade and nothing to Kit? So what that it made Jade want things and think things that were never going to happen? So what that it only encouraged her to indulge in the stupid fantasy that Kit maybe, just maybe, felt anything for her at all?

She wasn’t going to be angry over this, though. She was going to be calm—

“Yeah, but that’s not what we agreed on.” she snapped anyway. 

Kit turned around. Her heated gaze from last night was long gone. Instead, a searching, sullen thing looked out from her eyes. It stunned Jade slightly. She felt for the sofa behind her with her foot.

“Okay then. Just say it.” Kit’s voice was tight. “You want to stop this? Like, file for fake divorce or whatever?” 

Well, that was a bit dramatic. Jade’s mouth opened and then closed. 

Did she?

Kit’s question was unexpected. For all that she’d wondered about Kit and about their relationship, she’d never once considered calling it off. 

“No.” Jade said, finally. “I don’t.” 

Which wasn’t a lie.

“Oh.” Kit said, mouth downturned and slightly petulant. “Then what ?” 

Yeah, Jade, then what?

God, how did you say to your best friend of over a decade, “Hey, love kissing you and all, but, like, I am going to have a literal breakdown because I’m in love with you and you aren’t in love with me.” 

Hard thing to word, really. 

Jade swallowed. Scorpia was right. Perhaps it was time for some truth. 

“Kit, I can’t do that.” she said, quiet. “I can’t just...” 

Kit put her coffee mug down on the table, folded her arms, and said delicately, “Did you not enjoy it then?” 

Uh... what?

Jade’s entire being hit a brick wall going eighty. Her mouth froze, open. 

What the fuck did that mean.

“I—” 

“Look, Jade.” Kit sighed and leaned against the hardwood. “We’re both horny lesbians in our twenties and we can’t sleep with other people because we’re pretend-married. Let’s be real here.” 

Uh huh. Sure. What?

“We can absolutely keep that sort of thing out of our arrangement if it makes you uncomfortable, and I’m sorry for letting things get out of hand last night— honestly, I probably should have brought it up earlier.” Kit said. “But at the end of the day, we’re sort of each other's only option, right?” 

No.

Wait.

Yes?

Fuck. 

This wasn’t funny. Was Kit saying....

“Yes?” Jade said. And then, “Wait, so you’re just fine with us... kissing and stuff?” 

Kit’s face flushed but she said, “I mean, yeah, I guess. Do you not want to?” 

I want to. I want to. I want to. I want—

“Kit.” Jade said. “I thought that—” 

“I was going to make you live some sort of sex-less life?” Kit said with a tight laugh. “Nah, I’m not that bad.” 

Jade didn’t bother saying that it wouldn’t matter anyway because she didn’t even want to kiss someone who wasn’t Kit. Instead, she tried very hard to parse through the fact that Kit was just offering herself like that— like Jade could have her and it wouldn’t be bad or wrong. 

But it would ... because Kit didn’t feel the same. Right?

Kit said airily, “You should probably think about it. It’s up to you and I’m totally fine if you decide it’s a bit much.” 

She could touch Kit.

Just like that, no strings, no red tape, no shame, no worry that Kit might not want it. Would this be the closest she’d ever get to Kit? Maybe. 

Jade said, “Yeah. I probably need a second.” 

But her stupid, dumb, lovestruck heart said, yes, yes, yes.

They stared at each other from across the apartment, Jade on the couch and Kit leaned against the table. The space between them seemed to fold in on itself until they were mere inches apart. Jade knew Kit’s eyes better than she knew her own, she’d seen Kit’s face in every iteration a human face could manage. 

And yet...

What the hell was Kit thinking?

Kit took a step forward, and then another one, crossing the distance between them in far too little time. 

Jade reminded herself to breath when Kit was close enough to touch. 

“What are you doing?” Jade managed to say, quiet, unsure. 

“I have no fucking idea.” Kit said, unafraid, always.

And she knew the taste of Kit’s lips before she even had them. 

Kit was homecoming. She was familiarity, and decades of warmth and hands held and tears wiped away. They were eighteen and asking each other to prom, laughing the whole time. They were thirteen and sharing ice cream on a curb outside of Baskin’ Robins. They were eleven and Kit was pushing Jade up onto the oak tree outside their elementary school. They were eight and Kit was saying, “I’ll put him in the pool next time he does that, okay?” 

Now, Kit pushed Jade back on the couch. Her knees squeezed on either side of Jade’s hips, her stomach heaving as it pressed against Jade’s chest. She held Jade’s face in her hands like a lifeline and left kiss after kiss on Jade’s lips, Jade’s cheeks, Jade’s chin. 

I love you. Jade wanted to say each time her mouth was left unsupervised. I love you. I love you. I love you.

But she didn’t say that because that was not what this was.

Instead, she held Kit back, wrapping her arms around Kit’s waist, running her palms across the smooth skin under Kit’s sleep shirt. She swallowed the breathy little sounds Kit made into her mouth like a drug and fought after every moan like a woman possessed. 

When Kit’s hips rolled down against Jade’s thigh, accompanied by the worlds hottest fucking sigh, it was all Jade could do to not give in. 

She dug her thumbs into Kit’s bones to hold her in place, and said, warned, “Kit.” into the space between their mouths. 

Stop this. she wanted to beg. I can’t do this without falling so fast and so far that I’ll never get back out again. 

Kit let out a little huff. 

“Say no, then.” Kit said, eyes fixed on Jade’s mouth. 

Jade didn’t because she was horrible. 

Kit’s smile was playful. 

“Okay.” she breathed against Jade’s collarbone and Jade found it hard to think after that. 

Oh. she thought stupidly, when Kit’s kisses turned frantic and insistent against the side of her neck. This was nice.

Kit’s fingers worked the first couple buttons of Jade’s shirt but she popped up with a frown a second later. 

“You sleep in this?” she asked, running a finger along the shoulder strap of Jade’s sports bra. 

Jade nodded, wordless. 

Kit furrowed her brow. “It’s not healthy.” 

“Had a weird boob moment because I was wearing a suit.” Jade said. Please kiss me again. “I can’t have boobs with my suit.” 

Kit raised an eyebrow. “And is it still a weird boob moment now?” 

“Oh no.” Jade shook her head emphatically. Kiss me. Kiss me. Kiss me. “Have at ‘em.” 

She needed to be fucking locked away for that one. 

Kit smiled devilishly and they worked Jade’s bra off together. 

Jade’s head hit the back of the sofa and her hand came up to cover her mouth when Kit’s lips closed on her nipple and sucked, hard. The little whimper that left her mouth was downright embarrassing, but Kit yanked her hand away and said, “What happened to ‘we hate my neighbors?'” 

Lost to the void in Jade’s mind, apparently. She cried out when Kit pushed her over onto the couch and started on the zipper of her pants. 

In the end, even when Jade’s alarm blared at eight a.m. on the dot, rationality didn’t matter. When Kit tossed one of Jade’s thighs casually over her shoulder and Jade struggled to turn off her phone, it didn’t matter. When Kit licked a mind-numbing path to Jade’s clit and held her hips down with one hand, it didn’t matter. 

Jade was long past being rational. 

She choked out Kit’s name when she came.

After, Kit crawled up Jade’s body like a goddamn siren and kissed Jade, lazy and filthy. She could taste herself on Kit’s lips.  

“I’ve got class.” Jade said thickly, drawing Kit’s face closer to hers. “But I want to—” 

“No.” Kit said, and then with a small smile, “Go to class, please. We’ve got a meeting at twelve.” 

“Oh, okay.” Jade said, distracted by Kit drawing away from her and leaning back on the sofa. ““I’ll... I’ll see you then, I guess?” she finished lamely.

Kit called her an Uber and stayed close enough to touch until Jade closed the door behind her.

In the brief moment of solitude in between Kit’s apartment and the car, Jade paused. 

How the hell had that devolved so quickly?

Next time. 

Next time, she wouldn’t let it get so far. She’d tell Kit it needed to stop.

—

“Glad you both could make it.” Elora said dryly when Jade wandered into the meeting room. 

Kit was already seated and using her foot to spin her chair in a circle. The look she shot Jade— heated, glittering, half-hidden by thick eyelashes— managed to serve Jade’s heart in the air and spike it down so hard it splattered in front of her. 

Oh, no. She was not getting distracted by a stupid blue eyes, and stupid shaggy hair, and stupid, stupid fucking lips. 

Even if those stupid lips had undone her less than five hours ago.

“Hey.” Kit said through the viscera.

“Ugh.” Jade said, intelligently. 

Elora slammed her notebook onto the table. “Alright. That’s enough of that.” 

Whoops. 

Jade flopped into a chair and resolved to not look at Kit Tanthalos for the rest of the meeting. She also resolved not to think about the way Kit’s pretty blue eyes had looked up at her from in between her legs—

“We need to figure out a venue.” Elora started. She ran a finger down a list of names and said, “Look, in the spirit of full transparency, Sorsha wants it somewhere easily accessible by the press with space for well over five hundred—”  

“Yosemite.” Kit interrupted, and then after a second and a deep breath, “What are... what do you think about Yosemite?” 

Character growth. Jade thought it was hot. 

Elora raised an eyebrow. “I like it, but your mom isn’t going to.” When Kit opened her mouth to protest, Elora said quickly, “But, I have something else you might want to take a look at.” 

She reached into her bag for her computer, and after hitting a few keys rather aggressively, turned it so both that Jade and Kit could see. 

“Wayfarers Chapel.” she said. 

Jade watched Kit’s mouth purse and her eyes narrow and decided she liked it too.

“It’s... fine.” Kit said flatly. “We’ll do that then.” 

Elora smiled, “Wonderful. A red and gold color scheme would look perfect—”

Kit’s head shot up. “I thought we agreed on greenish blue?” 

Jade settled deeper into her chair. 

She wasn’t thinking about Kit. 

No, no. Not one bit.  

—

They agreed on a greenish blue. 

—

“Surprised you two made it in this afternoon.” Elora said as they walked outside. 

Ahead, Kit said something hushed and angry into her phone. 

Jade shot Elora a glance. “You mean because we drank too much wine?” 

Elora said, “Oh, yeah, that.” 

They stood in silence for a moment listening to the faint sounds of Kit berating someone before Jade said, “So you’re coming with us on Saturday?” 

Predictably, Elora glared. “No.” 

“Kit said you were.” 

“Kit’s a little shit.” 

Jade smiled. “And your Mr. I-Am-Become-A-Poet is what... a friend?” 

Elora’s face flushed. 

“You live in a glass house, Claymore. Watch your mouth.” she said.

Jade tried not to let her laugh sound too bitter, but she must have done a poor job because Elora sighed and patted her hand. 

“I get it. Don’t worry.” she said. 

Jade snorted. “You must think I’m an idiot.” 

Elora shrugged. 

“I subject myself to this damn family five days a week, so, not any more than I am.” she said. 

In the background, Kit barked something and then let out a dramatic sigh. 

Jade raised an eyebrow and leaned against the side of the building. “You’re too smart for this job, so why are you still here?” 

Elora sighed and leaned as well. “Contrary to what Kit might think, it has nothing to do with her brother. I was actually going to leave a year ago but then...”

Then....

Then Madmartigan Tanthalos had died in a car accident and no one had been left unscathed.

Jade didn’t really have to guess after that. Sorsha had already burned bridges with her kids, so Elora, Elora who’d so wistfully called love “the name for the desire and pursuit of the whole.” last night, had stayed instead. 

Despite the fact that Jade well and truly believed that Sorsha was the devil, she couldn’t deny the fact that Sorsha and Mads had been deeply, and irrevocably in love. 

Elora smiled sadly. “Mads was the best mentor I could have asked for. The company isn’t the same without him.” 

Jade cocked her head. “What would you rather be doing?” 

“I got a degree in Classics.” Elora said, eyebrow raised. “The options aren’t particularly expansive.” 

Jade rolled her eyes. “Yeah, but if you had to choose.” 

Elora said, “Don’t make fun of me, but I wrote my thesis on the concept of love. If I had the chance, I’d travel to the places I studied and do, like, actual hands-on research.” 

It was too perfect. 

Jade shook her head and said, “The fact that you and Graydon are both romantics is both hilarious.”

Elora glared. “And the fact that you and Kit both don’t know when to shut it is actually rather unsurprising—” 

“Jade.” Kit appeared at Jade’s side, face stony. “We need to go.” 

Elora handled being interrupted very maturely and waved them off, offering Jade a raised eyebrow. 

“What’s going on?” Jade asked as they walked out towards the parking lot. 

Resolutely staring ahead, Kit shoved her phone into her back pocket. “Airk called. I need to go pick him up.” 

Jade’s heart dropped into her stomach. 

“I’ll drive.” she said.

Chapter Text

They ended up half way down a street in the East Bay, in front of a low rise apartment building with exterior stairwells. The building’s front was pockmarked with worn in looking doors, most of which had the numbers written on them in pen. Jade pulled the car to a stop at the edge of the curb in a loading zone. 

Kit’s door was open and her feet had hit the pavement before Jade had even pulled out the key. 

The asphalt was hot enough to shimmer, and Jade’s face beaded with sweat the moment she left the safety of the car’s aircon. 

Kit had never mentioned this place— at least as far as Jade could recall. Then again, if it had anything to do with Airk, she wouldn’t have talked about it anyway. 

Talking about it ; something Kit Tanthalos was surprisingly bad at given how much she ran her mouth. 

Jade caught up to Kit on the second floor. She was already banging on the door.

It took a while to open, but Jade wasn’t particularly concerned about a neighborhood watch or overly interested PTA mom coming to investigate. 

The door did finally open, sliding just enough for Jade to make out a woman's face.

“Hello.” Kit said, decidedly unfriendly. “Where the fuck is my brother?” 

The woman looked a few years older than them. Her hair was drawn up in a bun that had seen better days, and her clothes were wrinkled. She looked exhausted.

“He’s not here.” she said, which meant that she knew who Kit’s brother was and she wasn’t a stranger; she was just someone Jade had never met from Kit’s nebulous of a life.

Kit stiffened and there was a second of silence in which Jade realized that this whole thing had the potential to become a lot more volatile. 

“Bullshit. He just called me.” Kit snapped.

The woman shrugged. “I don’t know, maybe he went out.” 

There was a certain set to Kit’s shoulders now. 

“ Maybe ?” Kit asked, cold. “This is your apartment. Did he go out or not?”

The woman shrugged. 

Shit. 

Kit had had enough. Her shoulder rammed the door hard enough to startle the woman, who stumbled back a couple of steps.

“What the fuck! You can't just—” 

Kit shoved her aside and yelled, “Airk!” 

Jade jammed her foot in between the door and the frame as the woman tried to close it again. 

“Hi,” she said. “I’m Jade.” 

The woman’s lip curled. “She can’t just walk into my house.” 

“Airk’s in here, isn’t he?” 

The woman scowled and Jade followed Kit. 

The apartment was surprisingly clean, but the air smelled distinctly like cooking meat and bleach which was incredibly unsettling. Leaving the woman behind, Jade hurried down the hallway. 

She had to trek through the kitchen and the living room before she finally found Kit in the first bedroom. She was standing beside the bed, hand touching the human sized lump under the blankets.

Jade didn’t have to be a fucking genius to read that something was definitely wrong. 

The blinds were partially closed, but the few fingers of light that were making their way through managed to illuminate a poorly kept bedroom. A few of the drawers on the other side of the room had been pulled completely out of the dresser. One of the closet doors hung off of its hinge. A phone, cracked messily half, was on the floor next to the bed. 

There’d been a bad feeling building in her chest on the way over, and none of this was helping relive it. 

“He’s high right now.” 

The woman was leaning against the doorway behind them. She seemed almost smug to know information they didn’t. 

Jade tried to recall the last time she’d seen Airk Tanthalos, and the only thing she was able to conjure was the way he and Kit had looked standing next to one another next to their father’s casket. 

“On what?” Jade asked finally, because Kit was quiet and still staring down at the bed. 

“Oxy, probably.” 

“And you just fucking let him?” Kit said. Her voice was shaking slightly, as well as her hands, which were holding onto the blanket like it might stabilize her. “Jesus, he said you were helping him.” 

The woman sneered. “He’s twenty-four. If he wants to get fucked, who am I to stop him. Hey—” 

Kit had pushed back the blankets and moved Airk’s head up so she could hold it still. Under the covers, his body shifted slightly and Jade heard a quiet groan. 

“Hey, Kit.” he said absently. “You came?” 

“Hey, moron.” Kit said, surprisingly soft. Then, over her back, “I’m taking him home.” 

The woman stiffened. “You can’t do that.” 

Kit wasn’t listening. 

“Can you walk?” she asked Airk. 

Jade didn’t hear anything but regardless of the answer, Kit threw Airk’s arm over her shoulder and Jade caught a glimpse of his face for the first time in a year. 

His cheeks were still round and his nose was still the same one Kit had, but his eyelids were fluttering over a blank gaze that swept past Jade and fixed on the woman in the doorway. 

“Lili?” he muttered, almost sounding confused. “I thought you left?”  

She didn’t respond. 

Jade moved to help Kit. Airk was oddly light and she was able to pull him to his feet easily. He stumbled a bit, but after shaking his head a few times, appeared to be able to stand.

The woman— Lili— held the edge of the bedroom door in one hand. Her fingers were tense against the wood.

“He’s got his stuff here.” she said, stiffly. “And I am helping him, even if you don’t think so.” 

“I’ve got shit he can wear.” Kit said, walking towards the door. “Move.” 

“You can’t touch him right now, he’s—”

“I sure as fuck can, get out of my way.” 

Kit shoved the door open with her hip and made space for them to move out into the hallway. Airk was docile, at least, and took being led outside rather well— all things considered. Jade took care to keep him from tripping as they maneuvered out into the stairwell. 

Lili followed behind them like a petulant ghost and stood in the doorway with her mouth drawn down in a bitter frown. 

“He didn’t want you to know.” she said, finally, to Kit. “It’s going to break his heart if you take him like this.” 

Kit said, “He called me. That’s why I’m here.” 

Airk probably needed to go to the car, Jade decided. She started down the stairs, taking the bulk of his weight to allow him to focus on just getting his feet moving. 

Behind her, Lili snorted. “He wouldn’t have done that.” 

Kit said, “Oh, you’d know, wouldn’t you. I heard you break the fucking phone.” 

There was a long moment of silence before Lili said, quickly, “I didn’t, and just so you know, you shouldn’t believe everything he says to you. He’s all fucked in the head now.” 

In a surprising display of rationality, Kit turned away from her. 

Getting Airk down the stairs was a feat, but they managed. Once they’d gotten him slumped into the back seat, Jade turned the aircon up and buckled herself in.

Kit dropped into the passenger seat and said, “Mine.” 

Jade nodded. The door to Lili’s apartment was closed by the time they pulled away from the curb.

—

It was easy for Jade to help Airk into the elevator and then through to Kit’s room simply by lifting him up when his steps failed. Jade filled him a glass of water while Kit arranged him on the bed so that he’d be alright if he threw up. They didn’t exactly know how much he’d taken, but his breathing was fine and his pulse was steady, if not a bit slow. 

He fell asleep once they’d gotten him horizontal.

Jade pulled the window shades down and followed Kit out into the living room. She felt funny, like there was a breath she needed to let out or a coat she needed to take off. 

Kit was standing still, staring down at a spot on the carpet. Finally, she looked at Jade, scrunched her eyebrows, and said, almost aggressively, “I didn’t know.” 

Jade didn’t know, either, but she was a lot farther behind on this than Kit. 

“What happened?” she asked, finally. 

Kit said, “He called a few weeks ago and told me about this new girl he was moving in with. I didn’t really think she sounded great but he just got kinda defensive and we ended up yelling at each other. You know how it is.” 

Jade did, in fact, know how it was. 

As kids, the twins had had the same hairpin triggers on their anger and while they might have gotten better as they grew up, nothing brought it back again like being around the other. 

Jade said, “Did he call after that?” 

Kit chewed at the inside of her lip. “I didn’t answer.” 

So, yes, then.

Oh, Jade had a fucking inkling she knew where this was going.

“Kit.” Jade said, but Kit had already turned and walked off towards the kitchen. 

“Anyway,” Kit continued, almost perfunctorily. “He called today and he sounded fucked over the phone and I— well, someone needed to take care of him and it she was clearly doing a bad job so, yeah. I didn’t expect... this . I didn’t know he was taking shit.” 

Kit poured a glass of water for Jade and pushed it across the island without looking. She started filling a second glass.  

Jade took it and said, “Why is it that I have a feeling you’ve managed to blame yourself.” 

Kit said, “Can’t imagine.” and there was silence.

Jesus, Kit.

Jade wasn’t sure she was cut out for this sort of therapizing but she wasn’t calling Sorsha.

Jade walked around to Kit’s side of the counter. She leaned against the granite and said, “You not picking up his calls did not lead to him having a... drug problem.” 

She couldn’t think of a better way to word it.

Kit put her untouched glass of water on the counter and grabbed the sponge off of the draining board. She still wasn’t looking at Jade.

“I’m his sister.” she said, after a moment of dumping soap recklessly onto it. “I should have known.” 

“You’re not his keeper.” Jade said. Kit flicked the water on and started scrubbing at a dirty plate. “You’re also not a mind reader and you’re certainly not his mom.” 

“No, I suppose not.” Kit said rigidly. They were silent as she rinsed the plate, set it to dry, and picked up a mug. 

It occurred to Jade that she’d left Kit’s only this morning. It hadn’t even been a full day, and she’d taught three classes, planned her wedding venue, and picked up Kit’s twin brother who had somehow managed to get his hands on fucking narcotics.

After a while, Kit backed away from the counter and said, “I’m going to go out to get him a new phone. Can I have your keys?” 

Kit’s car was still at the office. 

“Sure.” Jade handed them over. 

They hadn’t even taken their shoes off yet. 

Kit headed for the door and paused with her hand on the handle. 

“I’m going to be back in thirty minutes.” she said stiffly. “Can you— can you just make sure—” 

“I’ll look after him, Kit.” Jade said. “Go get the phone.” 

Kit let out a breath and didn’t move.

“I’ll be back in thirty minutes.” she repeated, almost as if she was reassuring someone. It might have been Jade, it might have been herself.

Jade made herself comfortable on the couch after Kit left, leaving the bedroom door wide open. She could make out Airk’s shape under the covers, sleeping peacefully as if there was nothing in the world that could possibly be wrong. 

—

Kit was back in twenty. 

She tossed a bag onto the counter and nodded briefly when Jade said, “He’s still out. Might be a while before he wakes up.” 

Kit made her way over to the couch and handed a wrapped parcel to Jade. “Here.” 

It was a sandwich. Jade looked up at her. 

“It’s five.” Kit said, quietly. “And you’ve missed lunch.” 

Oh, Jade thought, a bone deep wave of affection for Kit overcoming her. She’d not realized how much time had passed.

They sat side by side and unwrapped their sandwiches. 

“So,” Kit said after a while. “Waiting for my brother to finish his comedown your idea of a fantastic Saturday night?” 

For fuck’s sake.

It was so classically Kit to throw off something like this with ill placed humor, Jade almost laughed. 

But Kit’s hands had been shaking when she’d checked for her brother’s pulse, so she didn’t. 

Instead, Jade said, “Not really.” 

It was silent for another moment and Jade almost considered asking Kit how she felt, but Kit spoke first.

“You know,” she said suddenly. “I’d been thinking that the first time I was going to see him was going to be at my wedding. Like, I thought, ‘He’s gone right now but there’s no way he’d miss me getting married, right?’” 

She laughed. It was cracked and bitter and she shrugged it off a moment later. 

Jade put her own sandwich down. 

“I just didn’t realize , I didn’t know — I mean, he didn’t speak to me after it happened and I just... what was I meant to do, right?” Kit chuckled again. Her eyebrows were furrowed, her mouth tugging downwards at the corners. “I tried, I really tried and then he left too and it was just me and mom and I swear to God I’ve never been more angry about something in my life and—” Kit sucked in a strangled, hitched breath. In her lap, her hands were shaking again. 

Kit’s hands never shook. 

“I don’t blame you for being angry.” Jade said. She wanted to hold Kit’s hands.

For a single, hilarious moment, she considered the implications that would have on their fake marriage. 

How fucking trivial.

Fuck that.

She reached for Kit but Kit was already falling sideways, collapsing into Jade with all the ferocity of a hurricane. She fell like she knew Jade would be there. 

Jade didn’t know how to tell her that she would be as long as Kit wanted her. 

Jade could see Kit’s jaw working as she bit at her cheek, could feel the tension in between her shoulders and through her back. It wasn’t just her hands, either, her whole body was trembling. 

She still wasn’t crying. 

Jade shifted to a better position and smoothed a hand through Kit’s hair. She wrapped her arms around Kit’s body, as if she could simply draw the tension from Kit via contact. 

“You know what he said to me today, on the phone?” Kit asked, quiet and small. 

Jade let Kit’s head drop back onto her shoulder and pressed a kiss to the top of it as if it might solve something. 

“He said, ‘ I’m tired. ’” Kit whispered, choked. “And all I could do was yell at him. I told him that I was tired too and we were all fucking tired and then he gave me an address and then the phone disconnected. Jade, I fucking yelled at him. I— he was so scared and I just...” 

Jade said, “It’s still not your fault.” because it wasn’t but Kit was prone to beating herself before anyone could touch her first.

Kit let out a wet, harsh laugh and said, “You don’t know that.” 

“Communication is a two way street. It’s not on you to know everything about your brother.” 

“But I did when we were little.” 

“You’re not little anymore.” 

Kit was practically shuddering now. Her whole body flinched with movement when she said, viciously, “I forgot about him and this is what’s happened, okay? That’s my fucking fault.” 

“Jesus, Kit.” Jade whispered. “ Your dad died too.” 

Kit froze in Jade’s arms, the shaking ceasing as if someone had stripped it away manually. After a moment, when she’d not started breathing again, Jade realized that she was trying to stop herself from crying. 

And oh, Jade’s heart hurt, her chest hurt, her arms and her legs hurt, her fucking fingers and toes creaked with pain. 

Kit.

She didn’t know how to ask Kit to feel. To tell her it was okay. 

Instead, she squeezed Kit tighter and said, quietly, “You can cry, you know. I’ll be here.” 

Kit shook her head. 

“I will.” Jade said. “I will, I promise.” 

Kit shook her head again and Jade pulled her close enough to feel Kit’s heart beating through her chest.

“Let me hold you.” she whispered. “I don’t really know how else to love.” 

And Kit— her lovely, strong Kit— finally laughed and said, “Ugh, okay.” and started to cry.

—

Kit was quiet for a long time after the tears had stopped. She stayed pressed against Jade’s front, breath occasionally hitching, her nose occasionally brushing against Jade’s neck. 

It was almost nice, Jade thought. There was something particularly relaxing about Kit’s weight in her arms and against her body. Something calming about the warmth she could feel through her shirt. 

Airk woke up around eight and Kit went in to speak to him while Jade took one look at Kit’s empty fridge and figured out where to order food from. 

At nine, Airk wandered out of the room. 

“Hello.” Jade said, putting down a fork. She picked it back up a second later, not really sure what to do with herself. “How are you feeling?” 

He shrugged and said with a wry smile, “Parched, if you must know.” 

She slid him another glass of water which he nearly inhaled. 

“Where’s Kit?” 

“Showering.” 

“Ah.” 

Airk slid into a bar stool and observed Jade with a look that was practically stolen from Kit’s face. 

“You look well.” he said. When Jade hesitated to respond, he waved a hand, “I know, I know, can’t say ‘you too’ to a man who peaked in college and pops pills recreationally.” 

Jade stared at him because of course he and Kit would both think humor in the wrong goddamn place was the best way to go.

“You didn’t peak in college.” she said, finally. 

Airk’s lips twitched. “You think so?” 

Jade considered the various ways she could answer his question.

“Nah, it was somewhere around eighth grade, if I’m remembering correctly.” she said at last. 

He laughed. “Ouch, Claymore. It doesn’t hit harder than that.” 

For a moment, they were fifteen and Jade could hear them laughing from Kit’s bedroom. She’d woken up late and they were playing Mario Kart in the living room. She’d stayed in bed for a minute to hear them laugh again.

“I ordered Chinese.” she said. 

He nodded. “Good choice. Hey, did you get—”

“Peking duck?” She rolled her eyes when he nodded. “I grew up with you, too, you know.” 

She pulled out plates and set them down gently. Kit came out of the shower a few minutes later, hair damp and her eyes puffy, but she cracked a smile when she saw the food. 

She wandered over and leaned up against Jade’s side. Jade felt her flinch when she bit into a spring roll and let out a muffled cry. 

“Hot.” she muttered through a full mouth a few seconds later.

Jade handed her a glass of water and a napkin with a laugh. 

“Congratulations, by the way.” Airk said. 

Jade and Kit looked up at him. 

“You’re getting married.” Airk said. He made little jazz hands. “You know, your special day. ” 

Jade chanced a look at Kit, who’d gone still next to her. Had Kit told him? 

“Yeah,” Jade said, slowly. “Thanks.” 

Airk laughed. “God, I was wondering how long it was going to take for you two to get together. I mean, Kit’s been pining after y—” 

“Alright, she doesn’t need to hear all that.” Kit said loudly, and Jade turned to her with raised eyebrows. 

“What do you mean?” she said, delighting when Kit flushed a deep crimson. “I want to know everything about you, my darling.” 

Kit aimed a punch at Jade’s arm. “No, you don’t. Shut up.” 

“Oh, has she not told you?” Airk looked delighted. “Kit was just—”

Kit let out a loud wail and resorted, animalistically, to throwing a spring roll at him. 

He moved aside with a cackle, sluggishly tipping a little bit as he righted himself again. 

Jade pretended not to notice it and, when Kit stiffened for a quick second, she was pretty sure Kit was pretending too.

The table was silent for a heartbeat before Kit said, “Anyway, we’re getting married in SoCal, if you didn’t hear. Wait— let me get my phone, the chapel is fucking gorgeous.” 

She snatched her phone off of the counter and brought it back to the table. 

“Look at the fucking arches.” she shoved her phone at him and for a minute, they were young again in Jade’s eyes. 

They cleaned up after dinner and Jade did the dishes while Kit pretended that she wasn’t putting Airk to sleep. 

“I’m just going to get you another water.” she insisted, waving a hand at him when he whined he could get it himself. She also insisted on tucking him in, and telling he could sleep as long as he wanted in the morning, and reminding him that there were granola bars in the cupboard. 

They were all just dancing around the elephant in the room, weren’t they, Jade thought. She put the last dish on the draining board and reminded Kit as quietly as she could that the granola bars were expired by a solid year.

It wasn’t her job to make them talk about it, though. 

Kit came into the kitchen afterwards. 

“I made up the guest room.” she said, quietly. “If you wanted to stay.” 

She did. She wanted to stay forever.

Jade cocked her head, “Do you want me to stay?” 

And Kit said, “Yes.”

Jade let out a breath. 

“Okay,” she said. “I’d love to, then.” 

—

Later, when they were in bed and the light was off, Jade wondered why she cared so much. 

Some people took fucking drugs to feel things, she thought, and all she had to do was drive twenty minutes to Kit’s house. She was lucky, in comparison.

“Jade.” Kit whispered into the darkness. “Will you...” 

Jade didn’t bother waiting. 

“Of course.” she said. Always. Whenever.

Kit scooted back and Jade leaned forward, using her arm to drag Kit across the rest of the bed and into her chest. 

“Thanks.” Kit said quietly. 

Jade kissed her head again. 

I love you , she didn’t say. I love you and I’m going to tell you one day.

Chapter Text

It felt like seconds later when Jade woke up for the first time. The bed was moving, and her eyes were still blurry from sleep so she couldn’t make out much. The warmth between her arms had gone.

She must have made some sort of noise because Kit turned around. Her legs were already off the side of the bed, but she didn’t look particularly disgruntled despite how late at night it was.

“Airk’s up.” Kit whispered, grabbing a hoodie from the floor and tugging it on. “I don’t want him to be awake by himself.” 

Jade squinted and tried to nod. “Want me to come?” 

Kit’s smile was tired and Jade thought it was the most beautiful thing to exist at three thirty in the morning. 

“Nah.” Kit said. “You’ve got class in a few hours. Go back to bed. I’ll come back when Airk’s sleeping again.” 

She left. A few moments later Jade heard muffled voices through the wall. 

She’d made it back into a restless sleep by the time Kit returned. The sky was lighter— maybe— and she didn’t really know how much time had passed. 

“He okay?” she muttered as Kit slipped back in between the covers. Kit’s warm body moved back against Jade.

“Yeah, just anxious, I think. It’s not bad right now, but I’m pretty sure tomorrow isn’t going to be great for him.” 

“He wanna come with us to coffee?” Jade asked, tucking her face against Kit’s hair. 

“With his ex-girlfriend and her star crossed lover?” Kit’s body moved in Jade’s arms when she chuckled. “I mean, I’ll ask?”  

“M’kay.” Jade said sleepily. Kit was so warm, so soft. She felt right in Jade’s arms, pieces fitting perfectly together.

They’d been quiet for only a few minutes when Jade fell back asleep again. 

—

Her alarm went off at a godawful hour. She tried to move Kit as little as possible as she reached across the bed to turn it off, but failed spectacularly because Kit’s eyes flicked open immediately. 

She’d probably been sleeping half-awake, Jade thought. Through the wall, Airk was silent. 

“You leaving?” Kit whispered as Jade made to move away. Kit turned a little in Jade’s arms, and wrapped her own around Jade like a koala. It was cute. 

In the lightness of the morning, and somewhere in Jade’s sleep deprived haze, she decided she was in one of those liminal moments that didn’t really count. 

Jade couldn’t help herself. 

“Yeah.” she said, and she leaned forward and kissed Kit’s forehead. When Kit frowned, she kissed the downturned corners of her tired mouth and when Kit snorted, she kissed the wrinkle in between her eyebrows. 

“That was stupid.” Kit said. 

“You’re stupid.” Jade said and she rolled out of bed before she could say something she really regretted. 

She called Scorpia on the way home. 

“You sound tired.” Scorpia said instead of just saying ‘hi’ like a normal person.

“No way.” Jade said, flipping her turn signal and taking extra care to check her blind spot. She wasn’t about to get in a car crash because she was sleep deprived. 

“What’s going on? How was your little fairy princess ball?” 

Oh, yeah. That. 

Jade updated her, taking the long route to the gym in order to avoid the highway. The sun had fully risen by the time she was parking and pulling her bag out of the back. 

“Jesus, does Kit know which doctor to call?” Scorpia asked. 

Jade fumbled for her keys, phone sandwiched between her shoulder and her ear. “I’m not even sure Kit knows that she needs to talk to a doctor. She’s never dealt with this kind of thing before. I mean, she’s probably going to get the gist from Google today, but I really don’t know what her long term plan is.” 

“Well, there’s no fucking way she’s going to be able to keep up her hours at TI, manage the wedding, and help her brother through withdrawal.” Scorpia said. In the background, Jade heard a pot being set down on the stove. “That shit’s a fulltime job by itself.” 

“He was having trouble sleeping last night.” Jade said. “She had to get up like four times and she wouldn’t let me do it.” 

“Does she not want you involved?” 

Jade didn’t know how to answer, but the door swung open and she pretended that shouldering her way inside had caused her to miss the question. She chucked her bag in the office and started flicking on all the overhead lights. 

“We’re meeting Graydon Hastur for coffee today, so I’ll talk to her then, I think.” Jade said. 

—

They did not talk then. 

Instead, Jade met Kit outside of a parking garage three streets down from Lila’s Coffee Haus . Kit marched up in an odd, oversized pantsuit and aggressively orange sneakers  and said, “Right, I’m sure you’ve seen the insane number of reporters swarming around— you look really hot, by the way— so just keep your head down when we walk in. They’re mostly here for Graydon anyway, we’re kind of old news.” 

You look really hot, by the way.

Jade said, “Okay,” through frozen lips.

“Don’t worry about the smile and wave shit, these are just regular old paparazzi.” 

“Okay.” 

“Oh, also—” Kit dug in her tote and pulled out a little box. She thrust it at Jade and said, “Happy marriage day, or whatever.” 

It took Jade a moment to process. 

It was a ring box. Had Kit gotten her a ring? What the fuck was going on? 

Jade blinked at it as if she’d never seen one before. She sort of felt like she hadn’t. 

“For me?” she said. Kit blinked and Jade said, “When the hell did you have time to get this?” 

Kit gnawed at the side of her cheek. “Like a week ago.” 

A week ago?

“A week ago?” Jade said, eyebrows flying up. “What— no, why?” 

“Because you didn’t have one.” Kit said, slowly, as if Jade was missing a really key piece of the puzzle. “But, I mean, if you don’t want to wear it you don't have to—” 

“No!” Fuck. It was a little too loud. Jade immediately found herself weirdly strangled and she winced. “No, I mean— I want to. It’s beautiful.” 

It was beautiful. It was perfect. 

“Come here.” Kit murmured, holding out a hand. Her cheeks were rosy when she pulled the ring out of the box. She took Jade’s hand—

Kit’s skin was so warm.

— and slid the ring on.

Oh.

Well.

“It fits really good.” Jade said through a thick tongue. God, she’d lost the ability to think. Kit thought she was hot and had gotten her an engagement ring. This day literally could not get any better.

“Yeah.” Kit whispered, eyes locked on the band around Jade’s finger.

The ring was inlaid with emeralds so crystalline that they managed to sparkle even in the shade. Jade felt her stomach do something funny. It looked nice on her finger; the gems flush against the metal enough to be practical-ish, too. Kit had either guessed really cleverly or just knew her. 

“How’d you find something so perfect?” Jade asked, trying not to sound as breathless as she felt. 

“Well, you only wear gold jewelry and you’ve got a lot of green going on in your closet and I did a little infiltration mission into your apartment, like, a year ago to get your shirt size for a Christmas present and ended up just grabbing your ring size for the hell of it. I made a couple calls and got it custom made by this independent jeweler down in—” 

Hold on—

“Kit, you measured my stuff when you broke into my apartment?” Jade asked. 

Kit frowned. “Well, it’s weird when you put it like that. And why are you saying it like you’ve known?”

“I’ve known the whole time, idiot. You left the back window open.” 

“What!” 

“Yeah, honestly pretty sloppy burglary on your end.” 

“It was my first time, okay?” Kit said defensively. 

“Right, can we go back to you measuring my rings? That’s like top tier stalker behavior, sweetheart.” 

Kit’s eyes widened so quickly Jade might have missed it if she’d been anyone else, but with a fantastic recovery time, Kit managed to bark out, “And I’d do it again, okay? That was the best fucking Christmas present you’ve ever gotten.” 

Jade could have kissed her— which wasn’t saying much considering the fact that Jade was pretty much always willing to kiss Kit with little to no provocation. “You’re insane.” 

Kit rolled her eyes, cheeks flushed, but a little smile was tugging at the corner of her mouth. “Whatever.” 

In between heartbeats, Jade imagined how, in a parallel universe somewhere, she was pulling Kit close and taking that smile off her face. How she might lean back just enough so that their foreheads were touching and say something like, “You are the most beautiful person I know.” and Kit would laugh and say, “Shut up.” and they’d kiss about it. 

It was not like the morning, however. This was not a space in which they got to pretend. 

In the shade of the parking structure, Kit’s phone buzzed. 

“Where’s Airk?” Jade asked, eyeing the way the gold band of the ring looked when she stretched her fingers out. 

It looked good, was how it looked, in fact.

Kit let out a breath, eyes glued to her texts. “He’s at the doctors. I found a clinic in San Jose that’s going to help oversee his withdrawal. They’re taking his vitals or whatever and looking at possibly using other meds to help him get off of the oxy. They’re also setting him up with a therapist, a psychiatrist, and hopefully talking about support groups and shit.” 

“So we’re going to keep this coffee short?” Jade asked. 

“Two hours, max.” Kit said. “And I’ll need to grab him after.” 

Jade felt an overwhelming fondness for Kit and the concerned scrunch of her eyebrows. “You’re the best sister he could have, you know that?” 

Kit pocketed her phone and raised an eyebrow at Jade. She said, “He’s a little trollop and I hate him, actually, and I’m the only sister he has so he’ll need to get used to that.” 

They started off down the street together, hand slipping into hand like it was second nature, tugging each other close like they’d been velcroed that way.

Evading people with cameras was a Kit Tanthalos specialty. She used her grip on Jade’s arm to tactically maneuver them through the swarm and into the shop. 

Inside was more peaceful, but Jade was still put off by the number of people in LuluLemon leggings with Peloton yoga mats sitting around with their untouched drinks. Off in the corner, strategically positioned to avoid prying eyes, Jade caught sight of two heads leaned far closer than appropriate. She and Kit ordered at the counter before heading over.

“Hello, you two.” Kit said, dropping into a chair with a particularly large smile. Jade couldn’t tell if she was trying to mask her worry about her brother or was genuinely delighted by the way Elora had sprung away from Graydon like a frightened animal. “Sorry to keep you waiting.” 

Elora looked as if she wouldn’t have minded waiting a little while longer. Graydon smiled beatifically. 

“Hey.” Jade said.

“Is that new?” Elora said, eyes locked onto Jade’s hand like a fucking missile system. 

Jade stuck her hand out.

“Emeralds; a symbol of loyalty but also of new beginnings.” Graydon commented, taking his turn to scrupulously inspect the ring when Elora tossed Jade’s hand over. 

Kit nodded, saint-like as she sipped at her latte. “Oh, for sure— super meaningful.” 

Elora squinted at Kit, tugging Jade’s hand back. She admired the stones for a second longer before—

“You got it because her favorite color is green.” she said. 

Kit smiled happily. “I got it because her favorite color is green.” 

Jade blinked. “My favorite color is green?” 

She didn’t have a favorite color, as far as she was aware.

“Like, half of your closet is somewhere between the shades forest and moss.” Kit said. “I broke in to recover that sort of information, lest you forget.” 

“It is not and lest I have not.”

Graydon frowned. “Actually, lest is usually used—” 

“You broke in ?” Elora put down her coffee.

“Okay, look, it sounds bad when she says it like that—” Kit scowled. She pointed at Jade, “—and it absolutely is, FYI.”

“What about that black shirt I own?” 

“One shirt? Your counterargument is one shirt?” 

“Or that red one with the—” 

“Green stripe? Ho-ho, very clever, babe. Tell me more about the singular items of color in your closet.” 

Babe. Kit had said, babe.

Jade said, “Yeah, whatever.” and pouted into her coffee like a mature adult. 

Babe.

After a second Elora said, “So, you broke into Jade’s house?” 

“Okay, hold on a moment!” Kit protested as Jade sat up, grinning widely. “She’s gonna say something that makes me sound—” 

“Insane?” Elora raised an eyebrow. “Is that because it’s an insane thing to do?” 

“No!” 

“She actually broke the lock on both my back door and my bedroom window.” Jade said. 

“Okay, well climbing in through a—” Kit paused. “I broke the lock on the back door?” 

Jade snorted. “I’ve been waiting to tell this for like a year. Oh, Kit, darling, let me set the scene.” 

Kit turned a shade of red that nearly looked unhealthy, choked on her latte, and spluttered, “No! You’re gonna tell them about the eighteen-wheeler—” 

“The eighteen-wheeler?” Elora and Graydon managed to say at the same time. 

Jade’s grin threatened to split the corners of her mouth. “Oh, you haven’t heard about the semi-truck situation? Okay, so she manages to get, like, the best saxophonist in LA on the phone—”

Kit groaned.

—

Coffee went surprisingly well, all things considered. They left holding hands again, and Jade felt as if she’d somehow managed to capture the sun against her fucking side. 

“Want me to drive you to San Jose?” Jade asked as they approached the parking structure. 

Kit pulled out her phone as it buzzed again. “Nah, it’s fine.” 

She let go of Jade’s hand. 

“M’kay.” Jade said. “Sure you don’t need anything else?” 

Kit halted in the middle of the sidewalk, tapped something into her phone, and then said without looking, “I think we’re good.” When she finally did glance back up at Jade, she smiled wanly at whatever expression she must have found on Jade’s face and said, “I’m not trying to brush you off, sorry, I think I might just want to handle this one on my own.” 

It made sense. It was her brother. Jade nodded and said hesitantly, “Are you sure? I mean, I really don’t have a problem picking up any sort of slack. I know with your work schedule and everything you’re already kind of busy.” 

Because she’d been fucking fused with Kit’s backbone since they’d met and she didn’t exactly know how to tell Kit that this wasn’t going to change anything. 

Kit finally put her phone into her pocket. She said, “Yeah, I’ll let you know.” 

Which was code for, “You’ll never hear from me again,” if Jade was guessing right. She usually was. 

“Kit—” 

“Look, I know you want to help, Jade, okay?” Kit’s mouth did something funny before she said, “But this is a family thing.” 

A family thing? A family thing that didn’t involve Sorsha, apparently. 

Jade squinted. “Yeah, but—” 

“So, don’t fucking worry about it, okay?” 

Jade blinked. She’d pushed too hard. 

Shit.

Kit, too, reacted immediately, frowning furiously and biting at her lip. “I didn’t mean it like that.” 

But she’d snapped at something Jade had said. The stupid ring on Jade’s finger glittered uselessly. 

“Nah, it’s fine.” Jade sounded weak. “Just... just call me or something if— well, I know you said you didn’t... but just, if you need anything, okay?” 

They parted without touching. 

By the time Jade had made it to her car, she’d convinced herself to let it go. Kit was stressed. She had her brother to deal with, plus everything at work. It was going to be a busy week, anyway. Elora had alluded to some sort of wedding suit fitting affair, and Jade had kids she needed to work with for regionals. She’d catch up with Kit later. 

—

She did not catch up with Kit later. 

Instead, Kit texted her, ‘ can i come over?’ on Monday afternoon— a whole day later— and Jade replied ‘ sure’ before she even knew what was going on. 

Kit appeared at her door less than ten minutes later with a couple cans of cider, some chips, and eyebags that looked like they’d been imported from the moon's craters.

“You good?” Jade asked. 

“Yeah.” Kit sighed, walking in. She tossed her items on the kitchen table, turned back towards Jade, and said, “Fuck me?”  

Jade nearly choked. “Uh, like, right now or...” 

“We can watch a movie first, if you’re so eager for some mental stimulation beforehand.” 

Nah.

Jade tugged Kit in by the jaw and kissed her with the sort of reckless abandon that was allowed when the girl you loved asked you to fuck her. Even if said girl didn’t know you were in love with her. 

That was whatever though. 

“Are you sure you’re okay?” Jade asked in between kisses pressed against Kit’s jaw. 

Kit’s hands worked themselves under Jade’s top and she said, “Jade.” 

Jade pulled back slightly and said, “I don’t know whatever the hell this is right now, but, like, seriously.”

Kit sighed a little, raised an eyebrow, smiled a little. 

“We can talk about it later, okay?” she said. “I just need a bit of stress relief, yeah?” 

“Are you sure? ” Jade asked insistently. 

Kit pulled her face back from where she’d been attached to Jade’s neck like a remora. She pouted a little and said, softly, “Jade.” 

And Jade had been on the fence about the whole thing up until Kit shrugged her top and shorts off in the middle of the living room, left Jade’s arms, and walked towards the bedroom. 

Because that was the thing. Kit wasn’t going to talk about it. At the end of the day, despite Kit’s talent for talking like she owned the world, the last thing she’d address would be herself. 

They’d talk about it later.

“Coming?” Kit called. 

Hello, sailor. 

—

‘everything okay?’ Jade texted on Tuesday.

‘yeah, all good.’ Kit replied at eight in the evening. 

—

They did not talk about it later. By the time Wednesday hit, Kit Tanthalos had disappeared into the woodwork.

Chapter Text

“Well, she’s not texting me back, either.” Jade said, looking both ways before crossing the street like a proper adult. Her coffee threatened to spill as she jogged across the parking lot and entered the gym. 

“I see.” Elora’s voice sounded particularly chilling over the phone. “Well, let her know that her mother doesn’t know about her disappearing act yet but will soon if she doesn’t show face.” 

“I just said I’m not in contact with her.” Jade said. “I literally can not do that.” 

“I don’t know what to tell you. You’re Jade Claymore.” Elora said, like it was obvious. “She always talks to you.” 

Again, not exactly true. 

“Well, not this time, apparently.” Jade found herself saying with more bitterness than even she knew what to do with. 

Elora was silent. Jade went about switching on all the lights, and booting up the fans in the back of the gym. It was late summer and the boiling heat outside was threatening her sanity.

The fact that Kit was effectively MIA was also a major cause for concern, but she could only deal with one shenanigan at a time. 

“Well, if you manage to get a hold of her, let her know I’ve already put her meetings into her calendar and that her mom is basically going to know by Saturday if she’s not coming back to work.” Elora was silent for a second. “Sorry if this is overstepping but, are— uh, are you doing okay? You know, because she’s not answering and all that?” 

Jade paused, laughed, said, “Yeah, great. Talk to you later.” and hung up the phone before drawing in the deepest breath she could manage. She let it out little by little, hoping it would calm the frantic beating of her heart. 

It didn’t.

Kit was missing. Well, not missing missing. And, of course, Kit went missing rather often, but the fact that Kit had dipped right after letting Jade know she wasn’t exactly family-level close was a bit nauseating. Not that Jade expected herself to be family— they had literally just had sex— but she’d thought that Kit might want at least a little bit of help. 

Jesus. 

But Jade was rational, so she figured that it most likely had something to do with Airk. 

Right?

She wasn’t comforted. 

She’d go by Kit’s house after classes, she decided. She’d seen Kit on Monday so it really only had been a day and a bit. 

—

Kit wasn’t home— or, at least, she wasn’t answering the door— so Jade left. She fired off a few ‘i’m worried about you, please text me back’ texts in the car before consigning herself to another day of mild concern. 

Well, it wasn’t exactly mild, but that was beside the point. 

—

By Thursday, Jade was officially Concerned. 

Kit’s last known location on Maps was some road off of Highway 280, which wasn’t even close to any sort of rehab center and gave Jade a grand total of absolutely nothing to go off of. 

Jade dropped by the Tanthalos office, but the secretary told her— with a particularly deep frown— that Kit hadn’t been by since Friday. 

Which was weird because Kit was a workaholic to a fault. 

—

But Friday, Jade had graduated to fully fucking freaked out. She went by Kit’s house again. 

“Kit?” Jade pounded on the door. 

Silence. 

“Kit!” She tried again. 

Again, nothing. There was something angry choking at her throat, but she shoved it down in favor of clawing through her pant pockets for her keys.

Kit had given Jade a key to her apartment a few years ago— for emergencies, apparently— and Jade was pretty sure this counted. It took her a minute to get the door open with her shaking hands. 

Something inside was clicking. The apartment was pitch black. 

She closed the door behind her, the foreign feeling of trepidation creeping slowly in from the shadows. 

“Kit?” she called softly. 

In the gloom, she was able to make out the kitchen— the counter was strewn with dishes, half clean and half dirty, as if someone had gotten through half of them before giving up— and the living room. The latter was in a similar state of disarray; pillows tossed into the corner, a small pile near the couch which looked slightly like someone had slept there at some point in time. 

Jade toed off her shoes mindlessly, still trying to work out exactly what was going on. The rhythmic clicking continued ominously. 

As she moved closer to the living room, and towards the source of the noise, the little lump in the corner that Jade had thought to be the pillows, started looking a lot more human. Jade caught sight of what looked like light under a blanket. 

As she crossed the room, the sound of paper crinkled beneath her feet. 

What the actual fuck was going on.

Jade gently peeled back the blanket. 

Kit didn’t even look up at her. Instead, she hurriedly typed something into a spreadsheet on her computer and said, “I can’t, he needs me.” 

To which Jade said, “Kit?” and gently touched Kit’s shoulder. 

The reaction was immediate. Kit looked up, horrified, and scrambled backwards slightly. Her fingers were still comically poised over her keyboard as if she was going to write something else. 

“Fuck.” she whispered, looking genuinely terrified. “You’ve never touched me before.” 

Jade was silent for a long second. 

“What?” she said, finally.

Kit squinted. 

“Wait— you’re not...” Kit leaned forward and put her hand on Jade’s leg. After a second, she let out a deep breath and said, “Well, this is embarrassing.” 

Jade raised an eyebrow. “Yeah, what the hell is going on? Also, can I turn on a light—” 

“No!” 

It was so quick Jade didn’t even have time to raise her other eyebrow. 

“No lights.” Kit whispered. “He’s got a headache and he just can’t do that right now.” 

“Okay.” Jade said slowly. “No light then.” She glanced around again, trying to see a bit more in the darkness. “And what’s that clicking noise?” 

“Oh, this?” Kit lifted up the rest of the blanket to reveal what appeared to be a metronome surrounded by a bottle of ibuprofen, some sort of pamphlet that looked like it might have come from the doctors, and a half-empty bottle of Coke. Kit sighed, “I was using it to stay awake.” 

Jade had a very bad feeling about all of this. 

She narrowed her eyes. “For how long, exactly?” 

“Like...” Kit glanced at her computer screen. “It’s like one now, so... started financial thing at eleven— fed him at four, I think— since seven?” 

“Seven p.m. on Thursday?” Jade asked dryly. When Kit was silent for a concerning amount of time, Jade said, “What day?” 

“Wednesday.” Kit said quietly. And then quickly, as if she was angry, “I needed to be up, Jade, I can’t let him be alone right now, okay? And what are you doing here anyway?” 

Jade snapped, “If you’d picked up your goddamn phone maybe you’d know.” 

She hadn’t meant to snap.

Kit scowled and patted around in her pile. “It wasn’t buzzing so how the hell would I—” The screen didn’t light up, even when she shook it. “Damn, that’s dead, huh?” 

Jade’s lips tightened and she felt something akin to anger bubble in her stomach. She told it to shut up. She didn’t have a right to be completely angry. Yet. 

“Kit, you dropped off the edge of the earth for like three days. What’s up?”  

Kit was silent for a second before she said, “Sorry. I won’t do it again.” 

Well, so much for keeping calm. 

Jade’s mouth dropped open. “That’s, like, not a good explanation, you know.” 

“What do you want me to say?” Kit rolled her eyes and struggled to sit up. “I told you I didn’t need any help.” 

Of course Kit was going to be stubborn about this. 

“You’re using medieval noise torture to keep yourself awake.” Jade argued. When Kit opened her mouth, she said, “And yes, I know you can do it all yourself or whatever, but you don’t have to.” 

Kit looked as if Jade had suggested they both practice drag racing in a school zone. “Right, okay, well, I’m not letting mom onto this, she’ll just make it worse. And you’ve got classes— and regionals, I’m not so much of an asshole that I forgot about that, by the way— so I don’t want you involved.”

“But you understand that you don’t get to decide that I’m too busy, right?” Jade said, at least trying to be diplomatic. 

“Okay? I still don’t want you involved, he’s my brother.” Kit finally managed to stand. In the light of her computer, her face looked... well, far from angry, actually. “I’m... I’m figuring it out.” 

Jade might have been hurt by the brother comment if not for the fact that, again, she suspected there was something deeper to this whole thing. 

“You call this figuring it out?” Jade asked, trying to keep her voice level. “Kit, it doesn’t look like it’s going well.” 

“It’s the best I can do, right now.” Kit snapped, throat rough. “Sorry that’s not good enough.” 

“Okay, that’s not what I meant to say. Just— you’ll get sick and then you’ll literally be physically unable to help him if you don’t sleep.”

“Then I’ll sleep.” Kit said petulantly and Jade was about ready to throw a fucking pillow at her. “Thanks for letting me know.” 

“Again, that’s not what I meant, and you know it.” Jade snapped.

“Jesus, why can’t you just—” Kit cut off and simply glared, mouth tight as if she’d stopped herself before she could say something too bad. 

Unfortunately, Jade felt particularly incendiary.

“Not give a shit?” Jade filled in for her bitterly. In between one heartbeat and the next, something stupid cracked up like a glow stick in her chest. The apartment was dark. They were back in one of those liminal spaces. “You know,” she said.  “In some world, Kit Tanthalos, you’ll take your head out of your ass long enough to listen to me when I say I fucking love you.” 

The room grew quiet. So quiet Jade was able to realize that she’d broken far more than just a glowstick. 

“Fuck you.” Kit whispered, eyes rimmed a furious red, mouth quivering. 

Jade shrugged. “Point proven . ” 

“No, seriously.” Kit stabbed a finger at Jade as she crossed the room. “Fuck. You.” 

“Oh, go on, this’ll be great.” Jade nearly laughed. 

“You don’t get to just say that you ‘love me’, as if that’s going to change any of this. You don’t get to do that to me.” 

“And why’s that?” Jade asked.

“Because—” Kit stumbled for a moment, choking on her own heaving breath as she gathered her words back up again and spat, “I’m only going to say this once, okay? I don’t fucking deserve that shit. I. Don’t. Deserve. You. ” Kit’s chest heaved. “Now get out, please.”  

That’s... not exactly what she’d been expecting. 

Jade blinked. “What?” 

Kit’s mouth trembled. “I don’t want to talk to you about this.” 

Jade had known from the second Kit had turned down her help, that some sort of self blaming thing was going on. Kit had a habit of taking responsibility for things that weren’t her fault, particularly when it came to Airk. 

But this... this was unexpected. 

“What do you mean by that?” she asked, missing gentle by a mile and sounding rather suspicious instead. 

“Get out.” 

“Are you seriously saying that you’ve done something bad enough to deserve not being loved?” 

“Yes— no!” Kit glared and Jade could see the beginning of tears pooling in the corners of her eyes. “I don’t have to explain myself to you. I said, get out.” 

Jade felt like shattering the world. She did it with glee. 

“Kit, I love you.” She felt like a fucking arsonist. “You, of all people, deserve to be loved.” 

“Shut up.” Kit snarled. 

“You love your brother so much, Kit.” Jade whispered.“You love random fucking people enough to devote your entire life to helping them. You love—” Her voice cracked and Kit’s eyes widened furiously. Jade could see the panic in her eyes. 

“Please.” Kit begged. 

“You love me.” Jade whispered. 

The glass imploded. The crystal smashed. Jade held her breath and begged Kit to withstand the ensuing chaos—

Kit’s eyes flicked towards the door. She blinked. She looked back at Jade. 

—and Kit did. 

She said, eyes welling and voice small, “Why would you say that ?” 

But she looked nearly desperate , searching, like she was hoping Jade was going to say something. 

And Jade said, “Because sometimes I think you like to hide from the truth in order to punish yourself for the shit you think you’ve done.” 

Kit glanced once towards the guest bedroom. “I did that. ” 

“Nah.” Jade whispered. “You didn’t. That shit just happens when people go through a lot. There’s not a single cause.” 

But Kit already knew that, Jade realized. This was something else. 

“I don’t know how to love someone like me.” Kit said finally. “It’s too much to ask of you.” 

Jade said, “I’ll figure it out,” and she meant it.

“Oh,” Kit said. “You really are the worst. ” 

Jade waited. 

Kit crossed the room and stopped a breath away. Jade closed it for her. 

It wasn’t a liminal space, Jade decided as Kit stepped into her arms and tilted her chin up to stare at Jade. 

“I love you.” Kit whispered. “I mean it.” 

It was real now. 

She kissed Kit like it was the first time. 

Chapter Text

Jade woke up all at once with the fear that someone was demolishing the apartment— or, at least, that there was some sort of earthquake on its way to taking out the Bay Area. It took a few moments of reorienting herself to realize that it was only Kit thrashing in her arms like an animal. 

“Kit, what—” 

Kit had made it 360° and now— nose to nose with Jade— was looking at her with a particularly suspicious stare. 

“Good morning.” Jade said, heart beating inordinately fast.  

“What happened yesterday?” 

Oh.

The birds outside were making themselves known in the silence and the morning sun was keeping the room warm and there were two major options here: either Kit really had forgotten (unlikely based on the look in her eye) or she was back on her whole ‘fake marriage, no-feelings-for-Jade' shit.

Jade wondered exactly how disappointed she was about to be. 

She cleared her throat and prepared for the worst. “You... I— well, you hadn’t slept in, like, forever and so I came by and we yelled at each other quite a bit and then you— well, I said it first I guess— but, you said—” 

“I love you.” Kit breathed. 

Jade hummed noncommittally. “Yeah, something like that.” 

Kit frowned. “Something like that? I think I said exactly that.” 

“Yeah, okay,” Jade snorted. “You did.” 

Kit smiled, pleased. 

The truth was surprisingly gentle, Jade realized. There was no fear, this time, no doubt, when she gathered Kit tighter in her arms and kissed her forehead. 

“How are you feeling?” she asked. 

Kit had shoved her face into the crook of Jade’s neck so when she spoke, it was accompanied by the tickle of air on skin.

“Mm, fine now,” Kit said, lazily. “This whole sleep business was a great move on your end.” 

Jade snorted and stuck one hand under Kit’s shirt. She traced the bumps on Kit’s spine, the muscles on either side. 

“What needs to get done today?” she asked. 

Kit waved a hand at her bedside table. On it, her phone was finally plugged in. 

“Gotta take Airk to San Jose at noon. Got a meeting with Sidone at two. Wait— shit!” Kit’s head popped up. “I won’t be able to make that if—” 

“I can pick him up.” Jade said. 

Kit didn’t speak for a moment. She stared at Jade. 

“You don’t feel inconvenienced by that?” she asked. 

How someone could know someone else for twenty plus years and still ask questions like that would forever be beyond Jade. 

“I don’t have lessons until five, so no.” Jade said. “And, plus, I’ve not seen Airk in like a year so it’ll be good to spend time with him.” 

Kit still wasn’t speaking. After a moment she heaved out a breath and sank back into Jade’s chest. 

“Thank you.” she whispered, muffled by Jade’s hair. And then, even quieter, “I need you to know that I still feel slightly uncomfortable with the idea of you doing something like this for me, but I think it’s more of a ‘I don’t deserve this’ and less of a ‘I don’t want Jade to help’. Okay?” 

Jade most certainly didn’t laugh and placed a series of kisses onto Kit’s hair again. 

“Yeah, I get it. Thanks for spelling it out, though.” 

Kit’s face poked back up. “I’m trying to be communicative.” 

“It’s hot, I promise.” Jade said, wiggling her eyebrows. 

Kit grumbled and stuck her face back down. 

“You do deserve this though.” Jade reminded her after a second. 

Kit smacked her arm. “Shuddup.” 

“You do.” Jade insisted, squeezing tighter. “You deserve to be helped, dumbass. I should make you repeat that, you know. Do affirmations or whatever.” 

“If you make me do affirmations I will only purchase ice cream with lactose in it and fill the house with creamer and butter and horrible things like that.” 

“Cold, Tanthalos.” 

“Watch your tongue, babe, I mean it.” 

Babe, she’d called Jade babe.

—

At one forty-five in the afternoon, Airk slid into the front seat of Jade’s car. He had a pair of dark sunglasses on. 

“Doing okay?” Jade asked. 

Airk shot her a look over the top of them. “Want the easy answer?” 

He was dressed in sweats and a hoodie, and his skin still looked a little sallow. However, overall, his cheeks were fuller and his hair was washed and he was looking better . 

“Nah, we got a forty minute drive here, just give it to me straight up.” 

Airk sighed and leaned back against the chair. “I’m not having a baller time.” 

It was such a classic Airk answer. 

Jade laughed. “ That’s the hard answer?” 

Airk smiled a little, but his face hardened up again when he said, “Well, yeah. What else is there to say? I’m cramping like my bodies trying to pull a menstrual cycle special but with literally every muscle I own and I’ve got weird sweats going on every now and again. Oh, also, I’m ill half the time and I’m hungry every time I stop eating but full when I start.” 

Fair enough. 

Jade didn’t know what to say to that. “That’s tough.” 

“It is, isn’t it?” Airk snorted. “Yeah, well, it’s what I get.” 

Oop, and there was the good old undercurrent of Tanthalos self-hatred. 

Jade glanced over at his side of the car. 

He rolled his eyes at her as if he knew what she was thinking. 

“Who was that Lili girl?” Jade asked, deflecting. 

Airk didn’t answer for a moment. “Do you want the easy answer.” 

Jade stayed silent. 

“I met her at a party, I thought she was cool, turns out she did like an insane amount of drugs, and I guess I was into that.” Airk said. When Jade looked at him again, he said,  “I mean, again, what do you want me to say, Jade? It’s all a bit fucked when you get deep enough.” 

She was poking where she didn’t have the right to poke.

Jade smiled wanly. “That’s fair.” 

Airk slid his glasses back up and they were both quiet for a long few minutes. 

“I heard you arguing with Kit last night.” Airk said, finally. 

“Oh, yeah?” Jade said. 

“You don’t take her shit.” Airk said, smiling halfheartedly. “It’s really good.” 

Jade snorted. “I don’t know about that.” 

Airk rolled his eyes. “Dude, you’ve literally been the center of her universe since she was a fucking kid. Your opinion is, like, the one opinion she’s ever really cared about. ” 

Jade fully glanced over. “Sorry?” 

“She’s been in love with you since she was in, like, middle school.” Airk laughed at Jade’s flabbergasted face. “What? She’s not told you this shit?” 

Since middle school?   Jade had to take a second to wrap her head around that one. 

“There’s no way—” 

“She would talk about you in twenty minute intervals at the dinner table nonstop. She insisted that the house be clean whenever you came over. She used to write letters to the principal demanding all those classes that you wanted to be added to the curriculum. She literally came out to me by saying, “I think I like Jade in a more-than-friends way.” You were her legitimate gay awakening.” 

Jade blinked at him. She was so going to talk to Kit about this. 

Airk chuckled to himself and leaned back. “You know, I’ve been waiting for you two to get married so that I could tell you all this shit.” 

“You’ve been waiting? ” Jade asked. 

“Oh, yeah.” Airk looked over at Jade with raised eyebrows. “Who the fuck else was she going to get married to?”

—

It was a few days later that Jade, a woman twenty-four years of age, considered the fact that she’d never really taken the idea of her own wedding seriously. 

Not that she hadn’t enjoyed the cake tasting and the venue preparations, but that had been a relatively recent thing. Historically, the only person she’d ever wanted to spend the rest of her life with hadn’t— her understanding of that was actually developing particularly quickly— liked her back. And then there was the simple, but sort of sad fact, that she couldn't really picture her wedding. 

People had parents at a wedding. There was meant to be a bride and a groom— or whatever— and then bridesmaids and groomsmen. She didn’t... have those things. 

Which, again, wasn’t bad, it just made things tough to imagine sometimes. 

She was already sweating into her t-shirt. Perhaps thinking about this on the way to a suit fitting wasn’t the move. 

Her phone buzzed violently in the cup holder and she groped around for it.

“Yeah, so, there’s a bit of a situation.” Kit said when she picked up. 

“Oh?” Jade said. There was a dull thud on the other end of the line. She was not comforted. 

“Honestly, you don’t need to worry about it, I’ve got it handled, but just know that Elora might be in a bit of a mood today.” Kit said, very clearly whispering now.

“Okay.” Jade said. “I’m about fifteen—”  

On the other end of the phone, something clattered loudly and Kit said, sounding particularly guilty, “I’ve gotta go, sorry. Shit, you guys —” 

Opening the doors to Love, Lace, and other Fitting Things ten minutes later, was tantamount to a smack in the face. 

Kit had severely understated the situation.

“No! You need to understand when it is appropriate to say certain things!” Elora bellowed, jabbing a finger into the air like she was orchestrating some sort of group needlepoint stabbing. “And that’s always been the issue, hasn’t it. Not sure why I thought you might have changed in the last—” 

“Oh, I am absolutely not going to have you tell me all about how you wish I’d changed.” Airk groaned, leaning back on a zebra print chaise like a real asshole. He was wearing his sunglasses indoors. “ You can’t just expect me to just not have opinions—”

“I can if they’re bad ones!” 

“—and, if we’re going to be bringing things up, that’s your issue, frankly. Being in control of everything all the time is a bit of a fantasy and I hate to be that guy—” 

“Yeah, right.” 

“—but I’ve always said that. You just don’t—” 

“Ugh, you’re so immature!” Elora spun away from him and marched to the other side of the room. For a second, peace looked to be an option. Then, she whipped back around. “Actually, you know what? If you had an ounce, let alone a fucking whiff more maturity, we wouldn’t be in this scenario would we?” 

Across the room, Kit, Graydon, and a tall woman in overalls watched silently. 

Love, Lace, and other Fitting Things looked more like a workshop than a wedding dress store. The whole thing felt distinctly like a cabin and the few mannequins that were scattered around, were wearing entirely jean. 

Fun choice.

In the center of the room, Airk and Elora had cleared a blast zone of around fifteen feet, in which they’d decided to air out a year and a half of past grievances. 

Jade wandered through the menagerie to Kit’s side. 

“They been going at this long?” she asked. 

“Twenty minutes.” Kit said, frowning. 

“Over, what , exactly?”  

“Charmeuse versus satin.” Graydon said. 

“I’m Hubert.” the woman in overalls leaned around him to say. 

Jade smiled. “Jade.” 

“—and I have had it with your ‘holier than thou’ attitude, okay?” Elora sniped. “If you just—” 

“If I had just... just what? Huh? Exactly what could I have been doing that would have made up for your incessant need to—” 

“In all honesty,” Graydon sighed, crossing his arms and shrugging like an academic imparting wisdom. “Airk’s building a particularly strong argument— ‘Lor really does have deep seated control issues. Not really sure if I’m on her side here.” 

Elora went for a pair of fabric scissors. Airk dove for a pincushion in retaliation.

“Nah.” Hubert shook her head. “Dealing with emotionally underdeveloped men is truly the bane of most straight women’s existence. Don’t discount that.” 

“Are you the seamstress?” Jade asked after a moment.

Hubert nodded sagely. “That I am.” 

“Right.” Jade said. She looked back at Airk and Elora who looked dangerous close to engaging in some real hand to hand. 

“I’ve found it's best to let people blow off steam before we dig into the intricacies of fine craftsmanship and the ideal silhouette.” Hubert let out a sigh as Elora pitched a throw pillow across the room. “Even at the expense of good silk.” 

Jade couldn’t help but smile. “This is Elora and Airk we’re talking about here. Airk’s got a degree in professional verbal combat and Elora is... Elora. ” 

“Airk’s got a law degree?” Graydon asked. When Kit nodded, his mouth turned down, more amused than anything. “Interesting.” 

Jade resolved to read into that , later. 

“Okay.” Kit peeled herself off the wall. “Jade’s right. We’ll be here all day if we let them go on like this. Let’s get going.” 

Hubert followed suit, shoving herself off the wall and yelling, “Right, cut that shit out, yeah?” 

Jade had to respect it. Elora and Airk paused and even appeared mildly chastised; although Airk was still frowning petulantly and Elora had her ‘ I’ll spurn all ten commandments, watch me’ face on. 

Hubert nodded, satisfied. “Let’s start.” 

As mildly threatening as that sentence was, Jade didn’t much mind the initial measuring process. 

Chatting happily with Graydon, Hubert had Jade and Kit strip down to their base layers and took a series of measurements. Elora and Airk sulked on separate hot pink chairs. 

Hubert dragged in a rack of white clothes. 

“Right—” She pulled out a blazer. “— we’ve got a ton of options to start with. Are you thinking about an oversized moment? We could do some sort of visual pattern thing.” 

Kit nodded seriously. “I want the pants to have a bit of flow, and have you seen those jackets that are all over the internet right now with the massive embroidered capes?” 

“Oh, Anne would absolutely love that.” Hubert looked delighted. “She’s been angling for a hard-core embroidery project for, like, ten months now. Okay, lets try on one of these for size then—” 

She pulled a hanger off the rack and handed it to Kit. She turned to Jade.

“And what’s the vision here?” 

Ooh, hmm. Fuck if Jade knew.

“Uh, regular pants, maybe?” she said. Kit snorted. Hubert raised an eyebrow so she quickly followed it up with, “Not sure how I feel about a jacket. Maybe a jumpsuit of some kind?” 

Hubert nodded approvingly. “Yeah, we can absolutely do that.” She went for another hanger. 

Before Jade knew what was going on, she and Kit were sent off to separate dressing rooms and Jade was alone with a bundle of white fabric.

Right. No use messing around. 

She zipped herself into the jumpsuit and marched outside. 

Elora scanned her with an approving look. “That’s nice. I like the way the pant legs fall. Not a huge fan of the top. What shoes would you wear with this?” 

What was she, a prize cow? Jade looked at herself in the mirror. 

Elora, unfortunately, had a point. The neckline wasn’t doing it. 

“We should try something v-necked.” Airk put in. “And I’m thinking big sleeves, too. It can match Kit’s cape thing.” 

Elora narrowed her eyes at him. 

Hubert moved in with some pins and Jade stayed still as she pulled in the sides of the jumpsuit. 

Jade considered herself.

It was more than just the neckline that was bugging her, she realized. It just didn’t look as elegant as she wanted it to be. Of course, the idea that she wanted to be elegant was slightly laughable, but for her wedding ... 

Kit stepped out of the curtained room and Jade pretended to swoon so as to cover her very real flushed cheeks. 

“You look really beautiful.” she murmured as Kit joined her by the mirror. 

Kit’s gaze was slow as it wandered up Jade’s body. When she finally met Jade’s eyes again, they glittered happily. “So do you.” 

This was real. Jade got to have real things.

“Eugh, this is getting gross.” Airk called from the couch. “Get out of each other's space and turn around so I can see the front, please.” 

Elora looked like she agreed but would rather break her own hand than admit it. Graydon was staring at the rack of shoes contemplatively. 

“Right, loving the sleeves—” Airk said when Kit turned. 

“Really? They’re sort of plain looking compared to the whole thing—” Elora started and the peace was immediately broken. 

—

Jade found herself getting surprisingly frustrated two hours in. 

In the corner, Airk stood by whilst the other seamstress, Anne, pinned and poked at the jacket Kit had chosen. 

Jade stood in front of the mirror with a frown on her face. 

“Maybe... something more flowy?” she said weakly. 

Hubert’s eyebrows scrunched, but when she met Jade’s apologetic stare, she laughed and said, “I’ve had people take far longer than this, hon. What’s important is that we find something you like.” 

Jade hurried into the dressing room to slip into jumpsuit number seventy-eight. 

It still wasn’t quite... right. She walked back out into the main room. Elora gnawed at her lip. 

Jade adopted a real critical pair of glasses and stared at herself in the mirror. 

The issue wasn’t the jumpsuits, she decided. 

When Kit had told Elora that Jade hated dresses, she hadn’t been wrong. Their elementary school uniforms had involved skirts, and Jade’s wailed protests had fallen on deaf ears. In high school, it had been those skin tight, bodycon dresses that everyone wore to homecoming and prom and as much as she’d hated them... she’d hated feeling weird just a little more. 

But then she’d come out and gone off to college and gotten comfortable enough with herself to no longer need that particular uncomfortable— but protective— garment. She wore what she wore and she liked herself and it turned out that she still didn’t want to wear dresses to things. 

Which was fine— great even. 

But now? 

The ironic novelty of choice was not lost on her. 

She sighed and said to Hubert, “You’re going to hate me, but can I try on a dress?” 

Elora blinked. Graydon smiled. 

Hubert snorted and said, “Honey, you’re in the right store to be asking questions like that.” 

Jade found herself in the dressing room once again with a white wedding dress clutched firmly in her hands . Something flowy, Hubert had said, but it’s off the shoulder, okay?

Jade slid it on with as little ceremony as she could manage, turned away from the dressing room mirror so as to not... jinx it ? She didn’t know. 

“Kit?” she called, softly. She felt tense, anticipatory. Shivery. “Can you help me do this up?” 

She didn’t hear Kit’s voice, and oh , she’d forgotten that Kit was getting her own outfit done and probably couldn’t hear her—

The curtain moved and Kit’s face appeared. 

“Sorry, had to take the pins out of my hem. What’s— wow. ” Kit’s face jumped directly from surprise to something so soft and tender it made Jade’s throat close. “You look—” Kit cleared her throat, blushed, and said quietly as if she was telling Jade a secret, “You look really pretty.” 

Jade grimaced. “Yeah, well, lace me up here because this might be a one time thing.” 

Kit’s smile was soft. She walked into the small room and Jade felt her firm hands start on the back of the dress. 

“M’kay.” Jade could feel Kit’s breath across her exposed neck. Kit’s hands found Jade’s waist. She rubbed little circles against Jade’s hips. “I’m done.” 

Jade turned around. 

It didn’t have to look perfect, and she didn’t want it to be tight, it just had to be flowy and look maybe a bit pretty in that way that brides look and—

Jade cleared her throat. “Huh.” she said intelligently. 

Behind her, Kit pressed a kiss against Jade’s shoulder blade. 

Jade ran a hand across the watery fabric where it draped across her stomach and then pinched at it where it crossed her thighs. She could see the outline of her muscles when it shifted just right. It looked good against her skin. It made her freckles stand out. 

The laugh that burst out of her mouth was startling. Something stupid was crawling up her throat. 

In the mirror, Kit’s gaze flicked across her face, searching, always searching. 

“Damn it, I really like it.” Jade snorted. 

Kit smiled. “Okay.” she said. 

Jade gnawed at her lip. “Do you like it?” 

Kit’s mouth kissed the space just over Jade’s shoulder. Jade could feel her exhale, the tremble in her breath, the smile on her lips like a brand. 

“You look stunning. ” Kit said. “The most beautiful person I have ever seen.” 

Jade held herself back from giggling like an elementary schooler. “You’re a dirty smooth talker, Tanthalos.” 

Kit said smugly, “You gotta be when you’re marrying the hottest person on earth.” 

Jade used the excuse that she was going to show the others to hide the massive smile stretched across her flushing face.

“Yes!” Airk bellowed, jumping to his feet. He thrust a finger at Jade. “That’s it. That’s the move, right there.” 

“Ugh, I wish you’d be—” Elora turned scanned Jade from head to toe again and said, “That really does look good, though.” 

Jade was trying to hold herself back from a stupid little victory giggle as she stepped back over towards the mirror. Hubert raised an eyebrow. 

“Yeah?” she said. 

Jade nodded. 

Elora cleared her throat looking only moderately regretful, “Of course, as lovely as you look, we should go through a few more styles because I can really see something a little more a-line on you.” 

Airk wrinkled his nose. “A-line? A-absolutely not. Try something with more draping.” 

Elora looked incensed. 

“Do you have a plan for shoes?” Graydon asked, eyebrows furrowed. “The dress is more of an ivory so you might consider going gray.” 

Kit perked up and started backtracking to the dressing room. “I’ll just go wait to tie you into the next one!” she said with an impish smile. 

Hubert brought out a new rack of dresses and Jade resigned herself to losing the afternoon.

—

“You really won’t show me which one you picked?” Kit pouted as they finally stepped outside. 

Jade shook her head, smiling. “Why are you acting like I’m doing something unfair. I haven’t seen what you’re wearing either.” 

“That’s because they have to make it for me.” Kit said, rolling her eyes. “Plus, you already know what it is.”

“Okay? Same to you then. You literally put me into all of the dresses today.” Jade said. 

“And don’t get me wrong, I loved that job—” Kit sidled up to Jade’s front, pressing them close together. She fluttered her eyelashes like a little cheater. “Like, I really loved it, but I will actually pass away right in front of you if you don't tell me right now which one you chose.” 

“I’ll get the coffin.” Jade said. 

Kit groaned and threw her arms around Jade’s shoulders. “I’m dying!” she cried. “Literally, my muscles are atrophying as we speak! How could you do this to me!” 

Jade held Kit’s perfect face in between her palms and kissed her softly. She felt Kit smile into the kiss. 

Airk hollered at them from Kit’s car. Kit leaned back and said, “My mom’s pretty pissed we missed the last Tanthalos event. There’s another coming up on Friday, centered around Sidone’s charity. Wanna go to that?” 

Jade smiled and nodded. “Yeah, that sounds great.” 

— 

Jade let the phone ring as she pulled out of the parking lot. 

It finally connected with a loud crackle, which was dubious at best. 

“Hello?” a voice barked. 

“Hey, Willow.” Jade laughed. “I’ve got a question for you. Are you still doing metalworking?”  

Chapter Text

Jade’s phone buzzed obnoxiously on her desk— Kit’s name on the screen. 

“Is it weird that I never asked you out.” Kit said when she picked up. 

Jade took in her office, sat down on her chair, and debated exactly what to do with this confession.

She didn’t think it was weird . Of course, they’d been hanging out for, like twenty years at this point so... what really counted as a date was sort of up in the air.

“I mean... no?” Jade said. 

There was a sigh from over the phone. Kit said, “Well, I think it’s weird.” 

“Huh.” Jade chewed at her lip. “Good to know.” 

“Tonight, five p.m., what are you doing?” Kit asked. 

Jade said, “I guess whatever you’ve got planned.” 

There was a beat of silence. 

“Great.” Kit let out a big breath. “You know, that was a lot easier than I thought.” 

“You thought asking your fiancée out was going to be hard?” 

“Well, I didn’t think it was going to be easy.” Kit snorted. “I suppose you already asked the really tough question.”

“I did.”  Jade said, nodding deeply even though she was the only one in the office. 

“And how hard was that?” 

“Easiest thing I’ve ever done.” Jade said, smiling. 

Kit made some sort of noise over the phone that sounded a lot like a squeal. 

“What was that?” Jade asked. 

“Nothing.” 

Jade laughed. 

Kit shuffled something in the background and Jade could hear the sounds of a laptop keyboard being pounded on. 

“What are you doing?” Jade asked. 

“Also nothing.” Kit said, all too quickly. “You know what— see you at five.” 

And then she hung up. 

Jade blinked at her phone. 

—

Getting dressed turned out to be the worst experience possible. Not only were all her nice clothes in the wash or apparently otherwise engaged, she also had no idea what the hell she was dressing for.  

When Kit’s lime green monstrosity of a car pulled up in front of her apartment, she was still kind of confused. But, she was confused in nice pants, however, which was significantly preferable. 

They were getting married in, like, less than a month, and yet, ‘going on a date with Kit’ had never exactly been on Jade’s bingo card. God... what if it was awkward ?

She arrested that thought before it could make it out the door with her. 

“Where are we going?” Jade asked as she slipped into the passenger seat. 

Kit merged onto a residential road going fifty miles per hour. “Out.” 

“To do...” 

“Dinner.” 

Kit was wearing a suit— a nice one, too— which suggested that sure, maybe they were going to dinner. Didn’t explain why she was being purposefully obtuse about it. 

Jade narrowed her eyes. “Kit, what’s going on.” 

Kit shrugged, flipping a blinker and merging the other direction. “What?” 

Jade said, “Are you nervous ?” 

“Me?” Kit gasped, affronted. “Never.” 

“Then you’re hiding something— pretty obviously, too.” Jade leaned back and crossed her arms. “Okay, you’re dressed nice so it’s either a fancy restaurant or...” Jade leaned in to inspect Kit’s makeup. “Hm, no, definitely could be that steak place that we went to for your fifteenth birthday because you’re not wearing eyeliner.” 

Kit frowned. “What does that have to do with anything.” 

“You ordered a filet with so much spice on it you cried. Then you’d said it was the best thing you’d ever eaten.” God, she was a fucking detective. She looked down at Kit’s shoes. “And you’ve got heels on which means physical activity of any kind is out of the question so—” 

“Ugh, Jade, you’re going to ruin the whole thing if you keep guessing.” Kit pouted and turned her big, pleading, cheater eyes onto Jade. “Just let it be a surprise, okay?” 

Damn it. 

“Okay, fine.” Jade said as they nearly collided head on with a beige suburban. She frowned. “I’m driving next time, though, surprise or not.” 

Kit frowned. “What’s wrong with my driving?”

—

She’d picked out a cute Moroccan restaurant just outside of San Francisco with a good view of the Bay. Neither of them had ever been. 

“Your kids prepped for regionals?” Kit asked as she pulled Jade’s chair out. Chivalry wasn’t dead apparently. 

“Yep, Santiago’s been looking really good these last few months.” Jade flipped over the menu. 

“Oh?” 

“Miles is probably the only one of the older three I’m worried about. He’s got technique down but his stamina is still sort of lacking.”

Kit frowned as she checked her phone. “But I thought that you’d spent, like, all of this quarter working with him on it.” 

“There’s a lot going on. His mom told me he’s not doing so well in school right now, and I’d rather him focus on that then come in for more practice— even if he likes the sport.”

“There’s no other compromises you can make with him?” 

“He hates English, but it's just one of those subjects you really need good grades in. He can’t be skipping tutoring just to be at the gym.” 

“That’s fair. What about Vera?” 

It took Jade until their dessert came out to realize that not only was Kit fully distracting her, something was also wrong . She watched, suspicion growing, as Kit thanked their waiter with a charming smile. 

“Anyway,” Kit said, as the man walked off. She glanced back at her phone again, and then flipped it, face down. “How’s Scorpia doing?” 

“Good.” Jade said. She could feel Kit’s leg shaking the table. 

Kit hummed and stuck her fork into her lemon cake aimlessly. “And Boorman?” 

“Adequate.” 

Kit checked her phone again. 

Okay, that was enough. 

“Kit.” Jade narrowed her eyes. “What’s up?” 

Kit blinked, eyes wide, and slammed her phone down. “Sorry?” 

“You’ve checked your phone ten times in the last twenty minutes and you ordered shakshuka.” 

“So?” 

“You’d rather claw out your own eyes than eat a cooked tomato.” 

“Vivid.” Kit frowned and then said, “I told you not to try and guess.” 

“Sure...” Jade sighed. “Look, I’m not having a good time if you’re not having a good time, so you might as well tell me now.” 

Kit chewed at her lip. “You don’t want it to be a surprise?” 

“Not at this point, no.” 

“Okay. Are you sure?”

Jade was starting to feel as if something really bad was about to come up, so she braced herself. “No. Just tell me.” 

Kit let out a breath. “Our plane to Paris is leaving in an hour. We should probably get going soon.” 

Jade blinked. 

Their what?

“Did you just say an hour? ” she croaked, instead of the more understandable list of questions she had. 

Kit grimaced. “Yeah, you’re right. It’s an international flight— we should have left fifteen minutes ago. I’ll get the bill.” 

“I thought we were going on a... date.” But just saying it aloud made her realize how stupid it sounded. 

Kit looked at her bizarrely. “Uh, yeah, we are.” 

She should have fucking known. 

“ Fifteen minutes — Kit we needed to have been at the airport, like, hours ago!” 

“I know!” Kit sighed and dug into her bag. “Mom has the jet so I had to book— shit, I’ll just use cash.” She dropped a hundred on the table and stood up, chair screeching. “Right, let's blast.” 

‘Let’s... blast.’

Jesus. 

—

How the fuck they made it to the airport in ten minutes was the least surprising thing of the evening— Kit drove like she normally did, which was to say, as if SEAL Team Six was crawling up their ass. 

Jade held the pre-packed bags as Kit dropped the car off with the valet and then Jade was watching Kit hand over two passports at check-in, chatting to the attendant with a calm and easy smile. Jade let herself be tugged through security in some sort of daze. 

She had questions about how— and when— Kit had managed to do all of this, but they were severely out weighed by the why.  

They made it to the gate as the final boarding call was being announced. Kit apologized profusely to the flight crew as they were ushered on board to their—

“Are these first class seats?” 

It was rhetorical. They were, in fact, first class seats. 

Kit looked troubled. “I was booking last minute, Jade. I just told you mom had the jet.” 

Jade was going to have to have a real long sit-down with Kit to discuss just how different each of their valuation of a United States Dollar was.  

After this, of course. 

Jade flopped into her seat and gratefully accepted the champagne when the air hostess brought it around. 

—

They arrived in Paris at six in the morning. Jade was pretty sure she was hallucinating and she also wasn’t completely sure they were in Paris. 

Kit seemed entirely unaffected. She gently stroked Jade’s hair out from her eyes in the back of the taxi, commenting every now and again things like, “So this is the Champs-Élysées...” and “Oh! The Louvre! We’ll have to go there tomorrow.” 

Their hotel room looked out on the Eiffel Tower which Jade couldn’t even begin to comprehend in her current state. 

Instead, she flopped onto the bed with Kit saying, “Honestly, don’t even worry about jet-lag, just take a nap.” somewhere in the background and everything faded to black.

—

Jade woke up an indeterminable number of hours later. It might have been eight p.m.. It also might have been before dawn. The only thing that she could really use to tell time was the fact that the sky, visible from their balcony, was dark.

She felt kind of ill. 

“Kit?” she called, voice scratchy. 

No one answered and she heaved herself up. 

Someone had left a few soft, warm lights around the room. It was just enough for Jade to see that the other side of the bed looked undisturbed. 

The hotel room was beautiful, all white linens and big, swoopy curtains. Jade wandered over to the balcony. 

It was warm outside, and to her surprise, it was raining. In the distance, the Eiffel Tower glittered gold. 

“Do you like it?” 

Jade felt entirely too mesmerized to even turn around. She heard the door click shut and Kit kick her shoes into the wall. 

A moment later, arms tentatively wrapped themselves around Jade’s waist. She let herself fall back against Kit.

“Yeah.” she said, honestly. And then, “This is insane, you know that?” 

“I have no idea what you’re talking about.” Kit said, but when Jade turned her head to see over her shoulder, she was smiling a little. Jade tilted her head up and Kit gave her a slow, soft kiss. “Sleep well?” 

Jade was still dreaming. Probably. 

She hummed and kissed Kit again because she got to do things like that now and it was truly a revolutionary experience every time. 

“What were you doing?” she asked. She leaned her head back and tried not to shiver as Kit pressed her open mouthed softly against Jade’s neck. 

“Just... out.” When Jade huffed, Kit smiled against Jade’s ear and said, “Making reservations and stuff. Catching up on all the planning I’d not gotten done.” 

“Yeah, speaking of which—” Jade shot her a weighted look. “When the hell did you decide that this was going to happen.” 

“Yesterday.” 

“Yesterday when?” 

“Yesterday when you were at work and I saw a photo of the Eiffel Tower on Pinterest and remembered that you’d said you’d always wanted to go to Paris and also remembered that I’d never officially asked you out.” 

Somewhere further down the street, Jade could hear jazz music playing. People laughed loudly together, glassware clinked; all just indecipherable enough to keep the little balcony they were on isolated. 

“You’re insane.” 

“You mentioned, I think.” 

“I love you.” 

“Ooh, not mentioned enough , that one.”

“Kit?” 

“Yes, babe?” 

“Kiss me.” 

—

Jade woke  up the next morning feeling like she’d been beaten with a bag of bricks. Kit wasn’t much better.

“Where’re we going for breakfast?” Jade muttered to her. 

Without moving from where she’d shoved her face overnight— Jade’s tits— Kit pointed to the phone. 

Room service delivered breakfast at ten fifteen on the dot and it turned out that coffee and croissants on the balcony did, in fact, cure a lot of things. 

—

There’d been a reason why Jade hadn’t been able to find any of her nice clothes for their date the night before. 

“How the fuck did you even get in?” she said, staring down at the duffle bag that she had not packed and yet was full of her stuff.

“Do you really want to know the answer to that question?” 

Jade blinked. “Seeing as I’ve changed my locks recently, uh, yeah. ” 

“Do you remember how we did that circus camp the summer after seventh grade—” 

“Never mind.” 

—

They had lunch on a river cruise, where Kit held Jade’s hand and leaned against her shoulder and pointed out historical monuments over spoonfulls of bouillabaisse. She smelled like the shampoo Jade had used to wash her hair that morning. 

Then there were the pigeons in the park— Jade hated glorifying the little flying rats, but had to admit it was weirdly romantic anyway— gelato and the tiny art galleries Kit kept managing to find. They walked through a maze of backstreets that Jade swore to fuck weren’t on Google Maps in order to get to a theater. Kit, of course, insisted she knew where they were going which made them late by fifteen minutes. 

Kit grudgingly agreed to get a taxi in order to make their dinner reservation. 

—

“Babe, it’s fine .” Jade said for the fifteenth time, hitching Kit a little higher on her back so they could get into the elevator. 

“You’ve been carrying me since the restaurant. A herculean feat.” Kit kissed across Jade’s shoulders. “Thank you, thank you, thank you.” 

“I said I didn’t mind.” 

“I love you, thank you, you’re the best.” 

“Kit!” Jade laughed as Kit pressed an extra salacious kiss to the corner of Jade’s jaw that was certain to leave a mark. 

Kit’s heels dangled from her fingers and swayed gently as Jade maneuvered them down the hall. She tried getting them into their room as quietly as she could, and only narrowly avoided hitting Kit’s ankle into the doorframe.

Kit slid off her back the moment the door closed and bodily pressed her into it. 

“You’re the best fiancée I could have ever asked for.” she whispered. 

Jade looked down at Kit’s face. She had beautiful eyes. She had a beautiful smile.

Jade said, “I love you.” against Kit’s mouth as many times as she could manage. 

It devolved, driven either by the glasses of wine they’d consumed over dinner or by the shirt Kit was wearing which had been falling off her shoulders all night long and driving Jade up the wall. Or, by the fact that they were in Paris and there was a perfectly good bed lying five steps away. 

Jade tipped them back onto it and hovered over Kit, drawing lines down her quivering stomach with her nails, pushing up her shirt to feel her muscles moving under skin. Kit really was beautiful, every inch and curve and stretch of her body. 

The urge to consume Kit like a fucking forest fire had been chained somewhere behind her lungs for a good few years now, but like this — with Kit under her, panting as she stared up at Jade, looking just as fucking hungry as Jade felt— like this , she could let it go.

Kit let out a breathless moan when Jade bit a column down to her breasts. Jade made a mess of her there, sucking purpling marks into the pale, delicate skin while she rubbed her thumb roughly against Kit’s nipple. Kit’s whines were a goddamn symphony. 

She drew Jade back up to her face and they shared quiet laughs into eachothers mouths as they struggled out of pants and unbuttoned shirts. 

She was suddenly pushing Jade back. Jade stopped entirely, moving herself up and off— 

“Are you okay?”

Kit nodded wordlessly, breathing heavy, but not quite looking at Jade. 

“Then...” 

Kit chewed at her lip and said, quietly, “I, um, brought a strap.” 

“You what? ” 

Jade could have passed out. She might have passed out for a few seconds, actually. She came back to herself to see Kit’s face flushed bright red. 

“Like, a strap-on? It’s a thing that you put in a—” 

“I know what a strap-on is, Kit.” Jade said, voice hoarser than it had any goddamn right to be. “ Why exactly? How’d you get it through customs?”

Kit let out an incredulous groan. “First of all, I didn’t get it through customs , and second, is that really the question you want to ask right now?” 

“Okay, no, sorry. Why? ”  

Kit swallowed harshly and Jade followed the tight lines of her neck muscles as they contracted. She traced a finger down one of the tendons, almost absently, and let her thumb rest in the hollow of Kit’s throat. 

Kit mumbled something. 

“Hm?” Jade said. She dragged her thumb back up to the underside of Kit’s jaw. She could see the flush working its way down Kit’s neck and was suddenly struck by how hot Kit was when she was trying to figure out what to say. Just to rub it in, she said, “Didn’t catch that, sorry.” 

Kit scowled like she knew exactly what Jade was doing. Jade smiled because she did. 

Kit finally breathed out, all in one big exhale, “I, uh... wanted you to fuck me with it.” 

Oh.

The tiny noise that left Jade’s mouth was unfortunately just audible enough for Kit to hear. 

Kit choked and said, quickly, “Or, I could... you know, wear it and you—” 

The image of Kit’s body in the soft lights as she writhed on the mattress under Jade was already right fucking there , so—

“No, no .” Jade said. “Is it in your bag?” 

Kit moved out from under her and was off across the room before Jade really had time to digest exactly what the fuck was going on. 

Had she ever used a strap-on before? No. Was she pretty sure she was going to have to figure it out right fucking now?

Kit’s hands were shaking slightly as she shoved everything at Jade. “Here.” 

Yes, she was. But first—

“Kit.” Jade said quietly. She tossed the black harness, bottle of lube, and the moderately— Kit picked it for her own body, Jade had to remind herself — sized chunk of plastic over to the other side of the bed. 

Kit was still blushing brilliantly as Jade tugged her forward in between her legs. 

“Hm?” Kit said. After Jade just looked at her for a long minute, she laughed a little and tilted forward until her head was on Jade’s shoulder. “Stop it.” 

“Stop what?” Jade said to be an ass. 

“Stop looking at me like that.” 

“Like what?” 

Kit popped her head back up and grabbed Jade’s face. She leaned close enough for their noses to touch. “Like you want to eat me or something.” 

“I do.” 

“You what? ” 

“Kit, are you embarrassed ?” 

“ No!” 

Jade nearly laughed. She tugged Kit firmly down onto her lap and then rolled them over so that they were lying face to face on the pillow. 

“You brought a dildo from America so that I could fuck you.” Jade said. 

Kit groaned and stuck her face in Jade’s boobs again. “I hate you.” 

Jade fished her out again and put their faces close together. Close enough that she could kiss Kit when she said, “That’s hot, babe.” 

Kit grumbled. 

“It is.” When Kit looked to be at least marginally more sure of herself, Jade said, “Thanks for letting me know, by the way. We’ll have to go shopping when we get back.” 

Kit glared at her. “When are we getting to the bit where you fuck me, Claymore?” 

“When you don’t look like you want to die.” Jade said, turning Kit’s head to the side so that she could kiss her neck. 

Kit scowled. “I don’t want to die.” 

“How is it that you’ve used a strap before on other people and yet now you’re all concerned about it.” Jade wondered. 

Kit was quiet for long enough that Jade popped up to stare at her. She’d hadn’t exactly meant it as a serious question, but Kit appeared to be legitimately considering it. 

Kit’s mouth twitched into something like a smile, soft and surprisingly sweet. 

“It’s different when it's you.” she said after a second, shrugging. And then, quieter, “It’s more real and I have more trouble when things are... real , I guess.” 

Kit’s wide eyes held Jade’s gaze for a long moment. 

Then, Jade kissed Kit like she’d always wanted to kiss Kit; deeply and without remorse. She kissed Kit like she’d wanted to when she was fifteen and scared of having a crush on her best friend. She kissed Kit like she’d wanted to when she was eighteen and they were leaving for different colleges and she’d admitted to herself, at the worst possible moment, that she was, perhaps, in love with Kit Tanthalos. 

The moan Kit let out when Jade slid a finger into her was downright pornagraphic, but it allowed Jade to promptly abandon any concern she had about Kit being too embarrassed by all this. Kit was warm and wet and—

Huh, Jade was getting off to this a lot more than she’d thought she would. Not that she thought she wouldn’t because Kit was, as some less intelligent people liked to say, hot as fuck . 

It took two more minutes of plain old-fashioned fingering— she wanted to be cautious — before Kit was whispering, “Can you hurry up and fuck me please, I’m actually going to die now.” 

Jade laughed, rubbed her clit meanly, and said over the sound of Kit’s obscene cry, “Give me a minute.” Her stomach twisted happily when Kit’s eyes rolled back a little. 

Putting on a strap-on was an activity that Jade decided didn’t get to look sexy, unfortunately. Kit, swathed in bedsheets and hindering more than helping by feeling Jade up the whole time, giggled when Jade told her as such. 

“I think you look hot.” she insisted, as if she wasn’t biased as hell. 

Jade, privately, thought the black dildo looked a little silly sticking directly out from her pelvis and bobbing around a little bit— a thought that was quickly overshadowed by the fact that she was gonna fuck Kit with it and if that didn’t turn her on more than anything else in the whole world, she didn’t know what would. 

“So,” Jade analyzed the situation on the bed. “Why don’t you just sort of—” 

“Jade, baby?” 

“Kit?” 

“Lie down for me, yeah?” 

Jade flopped back and said, “Okay.” 

Kit was rippling muscles and slightly sunburnt skin and the bluest eyes Jade had ever seen. She climbed over Jade and Jade redefined the word ‘hot’. 

“I’m gonna ride you, okay?” Kit whispered against Jade’s ear, before Jade felt a warm mouth kiss her jaw. 

“Mphf.” she muttered intelligently as her brain turned to mush. 

Kit stifled a laugh against Jade’s collarbone. 

Then she was dripping lube onto the plastic shaft and spreading it around with her hand. It felt... distant. Jade watched her hand move with a weird detachment. 

Kit kneeled over Jade’s body and lowered herself down with a groan. The pressure against Jade’s throbbing clit increased and she found out, less startlingly than decorum called for, that this was an unbelievably hot experience that she was pissed she’d never had before. 

Kit paused halfway down to let out a breath, before she let gravity do what it did best and she was flush with Jade’s thighs. Jade’s hands found her hips and rubbed little circles into them experimentally. They fit nicely in her hands, like little hand holds. She gripped them harder as an experiment. 

“You good?” she asked, cautiously. The urge to buck up into Kit just to see what would happen was strong . 

Kit nodded, muttering something largely unintelligible. Jade frowned and gave in to the voices. 

Kit let out a broken cry when Jade’s hips snapped up against her. The force pushed against Jade’s clit and Jade bit back her own moan. She did it again. 

“Good.” Kit choked out, which turned out to be hot as hell to hear. Then she rolled her hips and Jade decided that yeah, this was gonna work. 

She gave in to the forest fire. 

Kit’s head leaned back, her throat constricting as Jade punched perfect, pretty moans out of her with each thrust. Jade’s fingers dug into her hips, the perfect place to get just enough leverage to—

Kit, breathless and unrestrained, gasped, “There, Jade, fuck...” 

There was going to be bruises on Kit’s hips. Jade didn’t care. She tightened her grip; if they could just angle slightly differently then she could—

Okay, this wasn’t going to work. She paused, pulled Kit to her chest with one arm, and rolled them over. Kit gasped loudly and then full on screamed when Jade lifted one of her legs up over a shoulder, and pushed back into her. 

There. 

Perfect. 

She ground deeper, each thrust sending a hot pulse up through her stomach and into her chest. She was chasing something now, she didn’t really know what it was, but it was there. 

Kit whimpered, reaching down to rub at her own clit. A second later, she arched back off the bed with a choked groan. She looked gorgeous, flushed and out of breath. Jade was certain she’d never seen anything more beautiful.  

She slowed. A second later, as Kit’s eyes cracked open enough to blink back at her blearily, she pulled out entirely. Kit let out a shaky breath. 

“You good?” Jade asked. 

Kit smiled, slow and sleepy, and said, “Take that off. How do you want me to make you come?” 

It took a second to compute. Kit’s eyes sparkled. 

“Huh?” said Jade, whose brain was working with reduced capacity. 

Kit raised an eyebrow, which had the effect of being simultaneously threatening and hot. 

“Fingers? Want me to eat you out? Pick or I’ll pick.” Kit said, pleasantly. She rolled over and helped Jade’s fumbling hands with the buckle of the strap. 

Jade said, “Fingers is probably fine, but you don’t have to—” 

Kit slid the harness off of Jade’s legs and cut her off with an absolutely filthy kiss. “I just came hard enough to see God, so please be good for me just this once, yeah?” 

Oh. 

Hm. 

Jade felt very much like being good, it turned out. She curled her arms around Kit’s neck and let herself be kissed into oblivion. 

Kit started with two fingers which slid in with embarrassingly little issue. It felt full and perfect and—

She groaned as Kit started up at an absolutely savage pace. 

“You’re good with that thing.” Kit was whispering, almost mindlessly, as she fingered Jade. Her smile was like the devil as she leaned over and kissed Jade’s breasts, sucking Jade’s nipples into her wicked mouth. “Fucking perfect, I should have known.” 

Jade came on a prayer. 

—

They curled up against each other afterwards, too gross to fall asleep but too tired to care. 

“I can’t believe you got that through security.” Jade sighed into Kit’s hair. 

Kit said incredulously, “What the fuck do you think check on luggage is for? ” 

Jade felt like her question hadn’t been that ridiculous. 

She took her head away to blink down at Kit. “Um, national security, not a strap-on.” 

Kit raised an eyebrow. “I need to go pee. I’m not entertaining this nonsense.”

She was leaving? Jade really didn’t like the way that made her feel. She wrapped her arms more firmly around Kit’s waist. 

“Can you wait a minute?” 

She watched Kit smile, which had the effect of rendering her completely stupid for the next minute. 

“M’kay.” Kit whispered fondly. “Just a minute.” 

Outside, the rain had started up again over Paris.

Chapter Text

She’d left bruises on Kit’s hips. 

And Kit’s boobs. 

And Kit’s neck. 

The list was actually quite long. 

Kit seemed to find them simultaneously amusing and hot. She spent a solid five minutes in front of the mirror running her fingers over them, and finally managed to tempt Jade into a mid-morning bath by suggesting they add to the collection. 

—

They snagged a private tour of the Louvre, then the Eiffel Tower, then walked the Arc de Triomphe. Consumed by whatever the French were putting in their water, Jade bowed to the impulses and kissed Kit deeply whenever she had the opportunity. In the late summer heat, she felt lazy and contented; as if all of time stretched before her in a great, winding ribbon. They wandered through gardens and took the train to the ocean and finally, out on the sand where the air smelled like the sea, Jade asked, “In June, at your mom’s event at the theater, were you going to leave?” 

If Kit was surprised by the question, she didn’t show it. Instead, she chewed her sandwich in silence and considered it. 

Having just doused the mood sufficiently, Jade waited. 

“Yeah, I would have,” Kit said, finally. “I think.” 

They’d dropped the picnic basket and the half empty bottle of prosecco on the blanket between them earlier. Kit put her sandwich down and leaned forward, wrapping her arms around her thighs. She tilted her head to look at Jade.

“Does that bug you?” she asked quietly. “The fact that I would have left without you.” 

Jade had thought about that for quite a while. 

Their entire life had been a dance, an intricate waltz that Jade had been just too scared to commit to fully. 

Her answer went something like this: Kit was an ever evolving monster; a giant, unleashed storm; she was a bullet from a gun. To ask Kit to stay would be like asking the sun to dim, or the ocean to cease. To ask Kit to stay would have undermined her very foundation. 

“You kissed me first,” Jade said with a half smile. 

“And?” 

“And somehow it took me two months to tell you I love you.” 

Kit raised an eyebrow. 

“It’s what you do,” Jade said, “You do things, you just start stuff without a care in the world. The most important thing in my life would have never happened if you hadn’t decided you wanted it.” 

Kit laughed a little at that. 

She said, “It would make sense if you were upset with me for wanting to leave. I’d understand.” 

Jade looked at her. Really looked at her. It was so very difficult to be upset with Kit, she’d reasoned a long time ago. 

“I was angry at first,” she admitted. “But I think I was more angry with myself. You’d kissed me and I’d just let that sit there between us. If you’d left, you’d have left because I’d let you go.” 

Kit let out a breath, but said nothing. 

Jade tugged at her hand and Kit broke a smile as she crawled around the picnic basket and settled in between Jade’s legs. She was warm against the sea breeze. Jade smoothed Kit’s hair back and pressed her lips to the crown of Kit’s head. Kit laughed and pushed Jade’s hair away from both their faces when the wind blew again. 

Jade took a deep breath, “If you still wanted to leave... I’d understand that, too.” 

Kit looked up, surprised. “What? Why do you think I’d want to do that?” 

Because... Kit was Kit. That’s why.

“It's who you are.” Jade shrugged. “I wouldn’t want to take that option from you. Even if I’m happy where I am, I’d want you to have that sort of freedom. Choose your own adventure, follow your destiny, or whatever.” 

Kit seemed to sit with that in silence for a long moment. Then she let out a small huff of laughter. 

“Great plan and all, but the thing is... the whole time I’d be so consumed with the fact that I’d need you that there wouldn’t be any destiny to be had.” she said, finally. “You have always been the only thing I’d be truly happy to stay for.” She wiggled around in between Jade’s thighs until she could see Jade's face before she said, softly, “Jade, I don’t want adventures if they’re not with you.” 

Jade found herself choked by the lump in her throat. Something about the sincerity in Kit’s wide eyes allowed her to form words.

She managed to whisper, “And that doesn’t feel restricting to you?” 

Kit laughed, “Being with you is the closest to freedom I’ll ever come. I’m more myself with you than I am alone, and the idea of living a life without you in it... I can’t even imagine. I don’t want that. I want you .” 

They sat together for a long while after that, watching the sun dip low and catch the tops of the waves; turning the sea red and gold. 

“We’re getting married,” Jade said. Just saying out loud made her chest flutter with something warm and wonderful.  

“Yeah,” Kit said, looking up, smiling tentatively. Whatever she saw on Jade’s face made it crack into a wide grin. She leaned up to kiss Jade gently. “We are.” 

Jade leaned forward and took a swig from the bottle of prosecco. She offered it to Kit. 

“To adventures?” 

Kit took the bottle in one hand, and then Jade’s in the other. She pressed her lips to Jade’s ring finger. 

“To our adventures.” she whispered. 

—

They flew back into SFO in time for Jade to make her early morning classes on Monday. Supported with a coffee and armed with gifts for the kids as an apology for her incessant yawning, Jade found that the vacation oh-so-surprisingly, hadn’t magically gotten rid of all of the work that still needed to be done.

“You’ve got a honeymoon glow.” Vera said dispassionately as Jade walked in. “And you got tan. Fuck. ” 

“Language.” Jade shot her a look. “And I’m not even married yet.” 

“I know. That’s what makes it even worse.” Vera shook her head and sulked back to her bag. 

—

“You two look refreshed,” Sidone said, smiling widely as Jade and Kit walked into the meeting room. 

Kit pulled out Jade’s chair for her like a real gentleman and said, “I’ve got a folder full of vacation pictures and a folder full of cost-benefit analyses and runway estimates. Which would you like to see first because I am fully committed to showing you both.”  

Jade sighed, and handed Kit the two binders that hadn’t fit in Kit’s bag. “She really will. She printed out vacation picture books on Tuesday.” 

“Jade won’t sign them, by the way, which is really killing my vision.” 

“I can’t sign my own photos, Kit, it’s self aggrandizing.” 

Kit blinked. “What if you just signed the back?” 

“That’s sort of the same thing... so, no?” 

“Hi, Sidone—” The meeting room door banged open as Elora marched inside. “Talking about your damn books again, Tanthalos?” 

“I was, in fact.” Kit said smugly. “By the way, FedEx notified me yesterday that you got yours.”

“Oh, yeah, fantastic work of literature. Pretty sure you sent it to me to be annoying. Loved the photo of you wandering into a light pole.” 

“Blue eyed people see worse in the sun! Plus, Jade wanted to add that and who am I to deny my wife.”

“Fiancée babe, but I love the energy.”  Jade smiled at Kit as she pushed in her chair. “Anway, Sidone, I’ve got a list of about forty names for you to call in regards to teacher support for the afterschool programs.”