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I…
A growl sounded from Hikari’s throat. A damp pillow absorbed the sound, along with the tears that would have otherwise spilled down his face.
What have I done?
Hikari couldn’t stop replaying the events of the day in his head.
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Dolcinea charged a spell. Hikari, Agnea, and Osvald were the only ones standing, and Castti was busy recovering. But no one else noticed the pink light beginning to shine in the superstar’s hand.
Even worse, her eyes were locked onto Agnea. Hikari reacted within a split second, shoving Agnea out of the way and taking the hit himself…
Himself…
Hit…
What was happening? Hikari couldn’t… ah, yes. That’s right. He was helping his Goddess with pest control. With a loopy grin on his face, Hikari charged at the girl in the dress. She was quick to react, though she was startled regardless. She drew a sword of her own and parried his blow. How troublesome! He struck again, this time using his momentum to shove her blade to the side, creating an opening. He thrust the blade forward, barely nicking her cheek as she stepped to the side. How infuriating! He began to drop himself to the ground, attempting to sweep her legs-
A sudden burst of light erupted at his feet, blowing him backward. What was that?
What hit me?
Who would want to hit me?
What’s going on?
What…
Hikari blinked. “Wha..?” Dazed, he took in his surroundings. Osvald was looming over Hikari, eyeing him as though he was a threat. Suddenly, everything came back to Hikari.
“AGNEA!” He bolted up. Osvald let out a satisfied grunt and returned to the fight. “Everyone be aware! This woman has the power to warp our thoughts!” The dancer looked back at the two men. “Gotcha!”
Hikari got up off his knees. Mind Control? …no. No. NO. Pure rage filled Hikari as he charged into battle. The energy generated by this fury was like nothing he had felt before. Dolcinea prepared a new spell but was forced to release it as she dodged a flurry of blows.
The air around Hikari began to glow blue. The wind began to pick up. Even his eyes turned cyan. Energy crackled like lightning around him as he approached Dolcinea. He raised his sword. The weight was indescribable, but… light at the same time. But Hikari didn’t care. All he cared about was removing the threat in front of him.
Of course, he wouldn’t kill her. That would crush any prospect Agnea had of becoming a star. He was definitely going to retaliate though. He raised his sword above his head. Lightning crackled around it as he spoke.
“I summon Brand… the Thunderblade.”
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The night was still, with one exception.
I hurt Agnea.
Hikari couldn’t bring himself to fall asleep. He had spent the last few hours crying his eyes out. His guilt was immense. Even though it technically wasn’t his fault, he couldn’t help but believe that he should have had some kind of control over it.
He had experienced things like this before, after all. After the defeat of his brother Mugen around a month ago, Hikari came to believe that he would never have to worry about the control of his mind and body again. But now..? If someone like that could gain control of his mind, what’s to say another person couldn’t?
Who’s to say if he even has control of his mind now?
“There you go! Now you’re asking the right questions.”
Hikari didn’t need to look up to know who was talking. “Come on. You know you can’t get rid of me. I’m a part of you, after all.” It chuckled, walking across the room and sitting next to Hikari. It put a hand on his shoulder. “I will always be in the back of your mind, ready to jump out at a moment’s notice. And if someone wants to pull your strings, why shouldn’t I give them a hand?”
Hikari swiped at the aberration with the back of his hand. Nothing. His hand phased through its body. “Hahaha! Oh, that was funny. You think you can fight me.” Suddenly, the phantom grabbed Hikari by the collar of his nightwear and stood both of them up. It delivered a powerful punch to his gut. Hikari doubled over, hacking and wheezing. “You can’t fight me. I’m stronger. I’m better. And you know it.” It brought its elbow down on Hikari’s back. He fell to the ground.
A scream let out in the room. But the voice did not belong to Hikari.
Partitio was on his knees in the center of the room, his hands tied behind his back, bruises and cuts all over his face. “Hikari! Wuh…what’s-”
“Look at you, just lying there. Are you waiting to die?” It barked out a laugh. “Oh, no. I want to make this last.” The phantom drew its sword and slashed at Partitio’s face. The merchant cried out, falling to the floor. There was a deep gash across his left eye. A foot came down on Partitio’s temple. “No. I want you to know exactly how powerless you are. I will torture you.” It looked Hikari dead in the eye. “Watch this. I’m gonna spill his brains on the floor.”
“NO!” Hikari scrambled to his feet, grabbing his sword and drawing it. It raised an eyebrow. “Really now?” It shook its head. “We’ve been over this. You can’t hurt me.” It’s right. But there is something I can do. Hikari turned the blade around, bringing it to his neck. If it’s a part of me… Hikari’s breathing became shaky. He began to tremble. Do it! Do it now! If you don’t, Partitio will die.
His breathing became rapid.
“AAAAAAAARGH!”
He pushed the blade toward his neck.
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“HIKARI! STOP!”
Agnea had a tight grip on his wrists, attempting to push the blade away from Hikari’s neck. She was rudely awakened by a loud thump from the floor above her, so she decided to make sure everything was okay. But as she walked by Hikari’s room, she heard panicked breathing. Since the door was ajar anyways, she poked her head in.
She wasn’t going to let this happen.
“Hikari, please! You don’t have to do this!” No response. He was looking straight ahead, at something that wasn’t there. Words weren’t getting through. A different approach was needed.
Twirling around, she kept one hand on the hilt of the sword (or rather, on Hikari’s hands holding it) and put the other on his cheek. She brought their foreheads together. “Please, Hikari…” His breathing began to calm. “Put it down.”
He blinked a few times. Then he looked at her. “...Agnea?”
Metal clattered against wood as the sword fell from his grip.
She moved her head away, frowning at him. “What just happened?” She couldn’t hide the shudder in her voice. He paused. “I…” Agnea brought her arms around him and pulled him into a hug. “Take your time.”
The room was silent for a few seconds. Hikari let out a sniffle. “...I’m so sorry.” He began to let out little sobs and hics. Agnea walked them over to the bed. “Why? What’s wrong?”
“I hurt you. I let her get to me and I hurt you.”
Oh.
Hikari had taken the time to explain the idea of Shadow’s Hold more in-depth, so she truly understood what frightened him about it. Having someone else pull his strings must have triggered some traumatic memories.
“Hikari, it’s not your fault. If you hadn’t pushed me out of the way, I could have been in your position.” Hikari looked away. “I should have been able to fight it. I should have been able to drive it off! I should have-”
“Shh.” She put a finger on his lips. She drew him back into a hug. He’s hurt. He needs someone. “None of us were expecting her to have something like that up her sleeve. It could have been any one of us.” She grinned “Wanna know something?” She felt him tilt his head on her shoulder. A quizzical gesture that Agnea found quite cute. “You actually saved my life there.”
Hikari drew back, baffled. “I- what? ” She nodded. “You’ve been training me in the ways of the sword and spear. We’ve been going for early runs and workouts to build my endurance and strength. You’ve shortened my reaction times. It’s thanks to you that I got away with just a scratch.”
Lightning struck a long way away, visible from the window. For a moment, only rain could be heard coming down on the roof and walls.
Thoom
Hikari flinched as the sound of thunder reached them. Then again as another rumbled around them.
“Hikari?”
“Yes?”
“...are you afraid of thunderstorms?”
“...yes.” He blushed, looking away. “Loud noises like that… they remind me of the battlefield. Of the noise and chaos I experienced there. But also… they scare me. They have since I was a little kid. I never discovered why.”
“...I see.” She got up, taking his hand. “Come. Let’s go downstairs.”
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There were a lot of different thoughts swirling through Hikari’s head. Not that anyone could blame him. He just tried to commit suicide because of a hallucination. One thought, in particular, stood out to him:
That was extremely foolish.
Noise could be heard from the kitchen. Agnea was doing something in there. Hikari had wanted to help, but Agnea restrained him before he could.
… no, that’s not quite accurate, the warrior thought to himself. I can't think of a single person that would consider a cocoon of blankets to be restraints.
Agnea had faced him toward a window, sitting on a couch that she had turned around. It still amazed him. I don’t think I could do heavy lifting like that so silently. Hikari half-smirked. She’s probably stronger than most of the soldiers back home. One of these days she’s going to win our little spars-
THOOM
Hikari yelped. He had been so lost in thought that the thunderstorm had completely slipped his mind. Another crackle sounded outside, but this time he only flinched. I hope I didn’t wake the others.
He needed something to keep himself busy. He tried to extend his legs and stand, but the blankets continued to ensnare him. He tried to move his arms to remove them, but those limbs were immobile as well.
Hikari sighed. Where on earth did she learn to do this? He looked around. And where did she get these blankets?
THOOM
Hikari flinched. With no other recourse available to him, the warrior settled for watching the raindrops on the window, waiting to see which one would reach the bottom first.
The sound of ceramic meeting wood reached his ears. Then again. Hikari felt something happening behind him. Was someone trying to poke him? …no, that’s not it. He looked ahead. He saw two mugs with brown liquid in them. Steam was rising out of them. Looking to his left, Hikari saw the shadow of a woman. She was reaching into a lump. The woman pulled at it, bringing out of it a large stretch of shadow. Hikari felt the grip of his cozy prison begin to come loose.
Once all blankets were gone, there was a moment of stillness. Hikari only had a few seconds of peace before he was hoisted into the air. “Wha-!?!”
“Hehe. Sorry Hikari, but I need you to scooch your butt back a little.”
The warrior could feel his face heat up. He felt he should say something, but chose not to. A pair of arms reached around him, the wrists suddenly flicking up. A blanket spread out in the air, pinned to where the hands held them. The arms drew back, and the blanket followed. It laid across Hikari, showing his frame underneath it.
The hands moved to one side, folding the blanket in half. The arms retreated behind him, replaced by the sound of footsteps. The option to look behind him was open now that he had been freed from the fluffy prison, but he chose not to. Agnea was stubborn about many things, including this. This wasn’t the first time she had helped Hikari through his episodes.
This was the first time it had almost gone too far though.
The footsteps circled him, and Hikari suddenly felt the couch sag on his right. Agnea dragged the table closer and brought one mug toward Hikari. She brought the other toward herself.
The blanket unfolded, covering both Hikari and the dancer. She looked at him. “Well?” She asked. “Aren’t you going to try it?”
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Agnea watched Hikari intently. He brought the mug to his nose, giving it a sniff. Worry started to build in Agnea’s gut. I hope he likes it. It’s been a while since I made this. He brought the mug to his lips, retreating immediately. Dread replaced the worry for a moment before Hikari said “Ow! Hot!”
Oh, thank goodness. Agnea giggled. “You might want to blow on it,” she commented. “I suggest sipping from the edges. It’s coolest there.” She took a sip from her mug. It tastes fine to me, but… she snuck a glance at him. I don’t know if he likes sweet things.
Hikari blew on the beverage before taking a sip from the edge. He furrowed his brow for a moment before swallowing. Thunder rang out in the night, but Hikari did not seem to pay it any mind. He looked at Agnea.
“…this is delicious.” He took another sip. “I don’t think I’ve ever tasted anything like it.” He attempted to drink it faster but started coughing immediately. “Haa! Haa! Hot!” He began breathing air onto his tongue. Agnea couldn’t help but notice that it looked like he was trying to whistle breathing in.
Her amusement must have been evident. “What’s so funny?” Hikari asked. Agnea chuckled. “Your enthusiasm about the hot cocoa. It reminded me of something.”
Hikari cocked his head. The inquisitive gesture. She knew what he was about to ask. “What might that be?”
“The first time Pala and I drank it.” She smiled. “Our reaction was a lot like yours just now.” The storm rumbled outside. She grinned even more.
“…Agnea?”
She looked back at him. “Yeah?”
“…do you like thunderstorms?”
She raised an eyebrow. He’s really observant. “Yeah.” She swirled the drink in her mug. “I didn’t always. I used to be really scared of them, and would jump every time it rang out.” A couple of large raindrops hit the window. They began traveling down, racing to the bottom.
“What changed?” Hikari asked.
One raindrop stopped moving. The pull of gravity had a hold, but something else held stronger. The other raindrop kept going.
Agnea smiled. “One night, Pala ‘an I were crying. It was thunderin’ somethin’ fierce out and it was scarin’ us half to death.” Another large raindrop hit the window, right above where the first one was stuck. The big raindrop lower down kept going.
Agnea took a breath. “Well, we musta been a lot louder than we thought, because Papa came in ‘an checked in.” The new raindrop fell and merged with the previously stuck raindrop. “He brought us out into the kitchen and sat us down by the window. After a lil’ while, he brought some of this out with him.” Agnea swirled her drink.
“He had us look outside at the thunderstorm. And then… he said somethin’ that opened me to a new way ‘a thinking.” The new, larger raindrop shot down to the bottom of the window in an instant, just a few seconds before the other. “He told us, ‘There’s a light side and a dark side to everything. It’s up to us to choose which side to focus on.’”
The light tapping of the rain and the rumble of thunder was the only noise that filled the room.
“…was there a light side to what I did today?”
Agnea looked at him. “…I think there is.” Hikari looked at her. “The fact that she used you to attack me, of all people, alerted Osvald to what was going on.” Hikari listened, hanging onto every word. “If she had made you attack someone else, it might not have been so obvious. We may have lost the battle entirely.”
Hikari nodded. Then he sighed. “What did I do to deserve you?”
Agnea put her mug down. She giggled, scooching closer to him and putting an arm around him. “You tried to escape if I recall.”
Hikari laughed. It was quiet, but it was an honest-to-gods laugh. “Heheh… dumbest thing I ever did.”
“Oh, I agree.”
Hikari set his mug on the table and wrapped his arms around Agnea. Then he pushed them both down. This left Agnea lying face-up and Hikari on his side next to her, nuzzling her shoulder. Oh Gosh, he’s adorable.
“Feeling tired?” She asked.
“Mmm,” he replied. She looked down at him, running her fingers through his silky hair. “Goodnight, Kari."
He breathed deeply. Agnea felt his arms circle her back, drawing her closer to him. His head nuzzled her neck now. She moved her right hand to where the back of his head met his neck. She brought her other hand to his back, rubbing small circles. This was a ritual of theirs whenever they had some time alone. Hikari loved being cuddled much more than he was willing to admit, and Agnea took a certain pride in the fact that he only opened up to her like this.
Of course, Agnea thought the cuddles were pretty nice too.
The time passed. One minute. Ten. Fifteen. By the time half an hour had passed, Hikari was sound asleep. Agnea listened to the sound of his peaceful breathing. She smiled to herself, closing her eyes. Of all the ways to fall asleep, this is a really nice one.