Archive of Our Own ^beta

They all have just completely whacked out sleeping schedules. Ian kind of sleeps whenever, he's like a puppy that way, and Jamie would be late everywhere if there was a possible nap involved, but Nash and Ry, they've always been married to the band. And they're night owls. they like to write at night and they like to talk at night and for the past couple or three years they like to talk and be together at night, because it's their time, and one night Ry is already asleep and Nash gets up out of bed and goes over to his suitcase and pulls out the wire and works at it, making it into a ring, and feeling all cozy and a little bit ridiculous and out of breath with how much he wants forever with this man, and Ry rolls over into what should be Nash's spot (he does this a lot, and likes it best when Nash is there, because then they spoon or, you know, more if Nash is at least half-awake, too) and lifts his head when he doesn't roll up against Nash, and he's all sleepy-eyed and his hair is just everywhere and he asks Nash what he's doing, and Nash sets down the wire and whispers 'nothing' and crawls back into bed with Ry.

Nash has been thinking about it for months. MONTHS. ANd he's got this ring he made out of steel guitar strings (yes, I stole this idea from a girl at the concert who gave Nash one that he posted on twitter, what of it? ;lkajsd;lfsad) and it's been sitting in the box that held his grandfather's pocket knife, again for MONTHS, and one night after a show, they're just lying there, in the bus, not even in bed, and not even having sexy times, and Ryan starts humming a song, and Nash almost has fucking TEARS in his eyes, and he jumps up, jostling Ryan's arm and Ryan calls after him, and then Nash walks back in the room, and he sets the box down, and he kneels down. And Ryan is still laying on his side on the floor. And Nash dries his hands on his thighs, and then pulls Ryan up, and says spend forever with me, and shaking and laughing at himself, he slides the ring on Ryan's finger, and Ryan has tears in his eyes, and then Nash realizes he does too when Ryan thumbs them off his face, and then they're just tugging at each other and kissing and laughing and yeah. <3

At first Ry’s a little concerned Nash is sick or something, and when he comes back in with the box, Ryan's mouth just goes dry, like, he can't even think, and then by the time Nash is pulling him off the floor of the bus, he's just grinning and staring at Nash's face, his eyes, his mouth, his hands, letting Ry go and picking up the box and then not even ASKING anything, just putting the ring on Ryan's finger, and Ryan doesn't even tease him about it, just goes to wipe the tears off Nash's face, not even realizing he's got tears on his own face, and then he calls his parents and Nash goes to get Ian and Jamie and the fucking bus driver and they stop at Burger King and he tells the fucking teenager who takes their order, and he keeps saying "he said yes!" and Ryan is just laughing and looking at him so fondly and saying "I didn't say anything." and then Nash is calling Paul and Julie, and Chord was out with Amber, so he texted Chord "call me, fucker, I have news," so Chord calls RYAN back, and the whole time, Ryan and Nash just can't let go of each other. a hand on a knee, or on the back of a neck, just connected.

Ryan is Chord’s favorite after all. I mean, obv he loves his brother more than anything, but I think he knew before anyone else how Ryan felt about Nash, yes maybe even before jamie. Jamie sits behind them, but his fucking hair is in his face 98 percent of the time they're on stage, so maybe he misses a lot, but Chord is smart and Chord knows feelings, and Chord wants his brother to be happy, and he loves Ryan. So yeah, Chord checks his phone when he and Amber get out of dinner (he's not a stupid man, you do NOT look at your phone or even have your ringer turned on when you're out with a beautiful woman, paul taught them well) and he sees Nash's text calling Chord a fucker and saying Nash has news, and again, Chord is no dummy, so he knows, and plus, he's seen that old pocketknife box sitting around, and what does Nash think everyone thinks, that he's really super sentimental about the BOX? So he calls Ryan, because he figures Nash's news is also Ryan's news, and he wants to hear the sappy stuff first, and he KNOWS his brother would just yell about how Ryan said yes.

And ;lakjsd;lfjkdsf;ldskas okay, they're at BK when Chord calls and Ryan, again, can't keep his eyes off Nash, so he's talking to Chord and walking around, because when CAN Ryan sit still? But always looking at Nash. Nash being ridiculous and ordering strawberry shakes for everyone that's in the BK and hugging the lady carrying a mop out of the bathroom, and Ryan tells Chord about his ring and then says Nash really does want to talk to him, and he hands the phone over to Nash who grabs for it, pulling Ryan to his side, and putting his hand on Ry's opposite hip while he talks to Chord. Ry scoots them to the little area between the outside doors and the inside doors and starts nuzzling at Nash's neck while he talks and then stops and just grins when Nash's voice catches as he asks Chord to be his best man. And the line is silent for a second, and Nash, laughing, says, don't leave me hanging, fucker, and Chord says, I thought you'd choose dad. And Nash says, you're my only brother and it would mean the world to us if you'd stand up for us. C’mon, Chordy...

And Chord is like, but who gives who away? And Nash is like I don't fucking care, give us both away, we'll both wear white tuxes, we'll make up our own rules, right Ry? And Ryan leans toward the phone still at Nash's other ear, and Nash is looking at him with the fucking tenderest expression on his face, but Ryan can't really see it, 'cause he's telling Chord to just say yes. And Chord is like, the fucker doesn't ever give anyone the chance to say yes, and Ryan laughs and says tell me about it, and Nash says y'all love me, and Ryan looks at him, and nips at the curve of his jaw, and Nash says, gotta go, chordy and hits the red square on the screen, stuffs the phone in his back pocket and couldn't give a fuck about who else is still in the BK or whether or not he actually PAID for the strawberry shakes or not, that's why they have Ian, because besides being the bossest bass player who ever learned how to play bass just for their band, he's also hella responsible, and so Nash just tugs Ryan out the door and Ryan turns Nash into the brick on the side of teh building and Nash has got his hands inside Ryan's jacket already, and Ryan puts his mouth right up to Nash's ear and says "yes."

They're talking about songs and Nash wants Chris Brown's forever, and Ryan bursts out laughing and says, I'd do just about anything for you, but we're NOT walking or dancing down anything to that song, and Nash is all, c'mon baby, it's a classic for a reason, and Ryan just keeps shaking his head, and Nash remembers about Ryan's ticklish places, and Ryan can hardly breathe he's laughing so hard, and Nash stops and asks, then what? what song? Because I would do just about anything for you, too. And Ryan's still, which almost never happens and he untangles his arm from where Nash had it pinned to his side, and he cups Nash's cheek and he says, what about the Beatles? Because it's always about the Beatles with them. Well, and Ryan won't let him pick MJ either. “for the dances of course but not for the ceremony.” And Nash says, but we make our own rules remember? “yeah, so we make them together.” “so it’s the Beatles.” And Ry’s grinning, because he knows he’s won, “and it has to be In My Life, because you are.” Nash grins back, “hell yeah,” and he pulls at Ryan's hips until he's sitting half on top of Nash, and then it's probably going to be a little while before they work out the details of their suits and whether or not either of them should dye their hair special for the big day. And they don't really think much for the rest of the afternoon.

[The Beatles - In My Life]

***

Nash is up in the apartment looking out over the hills where he knows the pond is and taps his fingers on the edge of the door, just looking. It’s a beautiful morning and the haze is barely burning off yet and it’s probably the earliest he’s been awake in months. His phone buzzes and he walks over to the kitchen table and picks it up. Sliding his thumb across the screen, unlocking it, he opens the text message.

SMS to NASH (Ry): I love you probably more than I should but not nearly enough.

Nash closes his eyes and he can hear Chordy moving around in the little kitchen area, grabbing a cup of coffee.

“What’re you doing up?”

“Nothing. Thinking.”

“Oh fuck, are you gonna get all deep and shit now that you’re gonna be married? I’m the deep one here. Let’s not forget that.”

Chordy’s looking over his shoulder as he taps a message back to Ry.

SMS to Ry (Nash): 2:30. Be there or be square.

He hits send and then thinks for a second and sends off another message.

SMS to RY (Nash): Part of my vows might include MJ. Are you scared yet? ;) Love u too.

Chord laughs and claps Nash on the shoulder. “Yeah, no fear of you being too deep just yet.”

“Shut up, assfuck,” Nash replies and grabs Chord in a headlock, spilling coffee everywhere.

“Come on, dick. I get burned and mom’s gonna kick our asses.”

“Fine, fine,” Nash lets him go and shoves gently at Chordy’s shoulder.

And then there’s a text from Julie telling them to get their asses up to the house because she made breakfast and they’re throwing clothes on and sprinting up to the house. Nash is met at the door by his sisters who are all hugging him and then his dad and then his mom squeezes him tight around the middle and he breathes in and all he can smell is her perfume and he remembers being little.

“If you cry, I’m gonna cry,” He says and she smacks his shoulder and he laughs. He backs away and kisses her cheek. Because it doesn’t matter if it rains today or cats start to fall out of the sky, come two-thirty, he’s hitched for good to Ry and that makes everything pretty fucking awesome.

He’s been sentimental, because of course he has. Nash and Chord stayed up late talking, just talking about everything growing up Overstreet. What it was like to live with a songwriter for a Dad and maybe understanding the power of words. Nash holds tight to the rolled up piece of paper that are his vows. He and Chord have gone over and over them and Nash hopes to God that Ryan never knows how much he thought - really thought - over what he wants to say in front of all of those people. There are two sheets of paper: One for what he can say in front of people and one he wants to say in front of just Ryan.

The morning is crazy. People, caterers, musicians, and Overstreets are running around everywhere. Nash’s sisters are at the main house where Ry and the Follese’s will be soon, he thinks, looking at his watch. Touching the face, he feels the inscription from his dad warm the other side against his skin. It’s the words from one of his dad’s songs: There’s a truth in your eyes... Nash knows the song by heart. Who doesn’t? Ducking his head, he breathes through it. Looking up, he sees Chord looking over at him. ‘Okay?’ he mouths. Nash just nods.

There’s a knock on the door and Chord runs over. “I’m getting it. I got it - got it!” Chord says, with his hand on the doorknob.

“Jeezus, then, answer it. What the hell’s gotten into you?”

Chord shrugs. “Bad luck for the....grooms to see each other before the wedding and all that business.”

“Fuck, Chordy. I doubt it’s Ry. Have you met him? It’ll take him two hours to fuck with his hair.”

Chord snorts out a laugh and then nods. Opening the door, in steps Julie. Chord whistles and Nash stops messing with his tie. “I’ve got the something old,” she says waving a jewelry box in the air. “They’re just on loan, though. So that’ll cover your something borrowed, too.”

“Will you guys stop? I’m not actually the ‘bride’, you know?”

It had started earlier in the week with Ian giving him a blue silk handkerchief for his suit. “It’s your something blue, dude.”

At the time he’d laughed it off and thanked Ian. But when Paul had given him the new watch he’d been eyeballing for months, Nash kinda sensed a theme. And he definitely wasn’t the girl here.

“Chordy, Dad needs some help with the ice. Could you be a doll and go help?”

“Yup.”

Nash and Julie watch him walk out and when she turns back around, Nash raises an eyebrow. “You just lie to your youngest son, Julie?”

“Maybe a little. He hovers.” She lays the box down on the table and waves him over. “Come here. You could never tie a tie right.”

She takes both ends in her hands and deftly begins the knot while Nash looks over at the wall, really anywhere but at Julie.

“You know when you were little and we’d go to church on Easter and I made you boys wear ties, you’d always come in complaining. Momma, why do we have to wear ties? You used to call me Momma back then, too.” She twists the purple tie this way and that and Nash just listens. “You had the sweetest hair back then. So curly, so red.”

“Kinda hated it.”

“Well, I didn’t,” Julie replies. “And here you are all grown up.”

“Mom,” Nash starts to say and it gets caught in the back of his throat. She looks up and he can see the tears in her eyes. “Mom.”

“You’re just so damned grown up.”

“You didn’t get all teary with Summer.”

“I didn’t give birth to Summer first. And Summer isn’t like you, Nash.”

“We’re not gonna have a sex ed talk, are we? Dad kinda covered that awhile back.”

“Smart mouth,” she says, adjusting the tie one last time. She pats his cheek and Nash just lets the moment be what it is.

“I’m not running off to Alaska or anything. Ry and I are still gonna have the apartment in Nashville. We’ll still come here.”

“Yes, but he’ll be your first priority. He’ll be your family.”

And that does it. Nash grabs her around the neck, not really caring about her dress or hair or make-up. He cups the back of her neck and kisses her cheek, harder than he should, but he can’t help it. “Don’t start asking for babies yet, okay?”

She laughs and steps back. “Y’all talk about stuff like that?”

“Mom.”

“Fine, fine,” she says. Walking back over, she picks up the jewelry box. “Grandpa Miller’s cufflinks.”

Nash sighs deeply. If this what the morning looks like, he’s not going to make it out of the afternoon without breaking his jaw from clenching to keep from crying. Everything, but everything is killing him and all he wants is to sit around with Ryan, whisper in his ear, have a drink, and marry his best friend.

He pulls out the links that he’d had for years and lets his mom put them in one cuff and then the other. The door opens and Skye walks through with a couple of small boxes.

“Flowers. Daddy told me y’all were down here. And that I should come and put ‘em in ‘cause he didn’t want blood on Nashie’s new suit.”

“I can dress myself. Been able to do that for awhile now.”

“Wouldn’t know that by your twitter feed a couple years ago,” Skye sasses back.

“One -” Nash begins.

“One? I wish it were just one. My eyes can’t unsee that shit.”

“ONE drunken picture and the world thinks -” Nash stops, remembering his mom is in the room. “Never mind.”

“Ha, I win,” declares Skye.

“For now, ginger.”

“Yeah, that never gets old,” Skye replies. “C’mere, shithead, gotta pretty you all up for RK.”

“Hold on,” Julie interrupts. “Picture.”

“Oh for fucks sake, Mom.”

“Nash Linden -”

“Yeah, yeah, skating on thin ice,” Nash replies and laughs while Skye pins on his boutonniere.

Then Chord comes in the door and it’s more flowers and pictures. Nash rubs his hands over the links and wonders if his Grandpa would be okay with what was going on today, but sets it aside. His phone goes off in his pocket and Nash fishes it out.

“You are going to turn that off during the ceremony, aren’t you?” Julie asks.

“Yes, ma’am,” Nash replies absently and opens up the text.

SMS from Ry: Is it too late to elope?

Nash laughs and thumbs out an answer, hitting send.

SMS to Ry: Breathe, baby.

***

It's a little more overwhelming than Ryan thought it would be. He's in one of the rooms of the Overstreet house. Most of the furniture has been removed, leaving a daybed, several spindly chairs, and a large mirror on a stand.

Everyone's moving in and out, and bringing him things, and taking things away that are no longer needed. At first it is great fun, and Ryan is super excited, and he can’t, just cannot wait to see Nash. And then the time between now and when he gets to see Nash just keeps getting more and more filled up with ...other people who aren’t Nash.

Their pictures together will be later, because Chord, of all people, is insisting on tradition. But at least Ryan doesn't have to pose for the candids Ian is taking while he dresses and his family helps him. Every now and then, as he turns to his suit on its hanger, or as his dad fixes his collar or Anna pretends to straighten his bowtie, Ian will flit over and smooth or straighten something, or tuck something underneath something else, just so he can snap the perfect shot, but he doesn't arrange Ryan, and Ryan is thankful.

Ian rests his hand on Ryan's shoulder now, and they both look into the mirror.

"It's finally here, man."

Ryan turns to face Ian in the room, instead of their mirror selves.

"It is." He feels his mouth turn up, a fraction of his usual smile. Maybe he can breathe when he can finally see Nash.

Adam comes in with yet another flower arrangement and he's asking something. He's holding out a swath of fabric and asking something. Ryan can't focus.

"Hey, everyone! Let's clear out for a minute." Ryan looks up to see Jamie in the doorway, waving everyone out. Never has he been happier to see his baby brother, and Jamie's face is ALWAYS welcome. Aunt Clara picks up her magazine, Ryan's dad can be heard out in the hall talking to Anna. Adam nods, hugs Ryan quickly, gathers whatever it was he was trying to show Ryan earlier and leaves.

Ryan’s mom is last, smoothing with one hand from his lapel up to his shoulder, leaning in, and whispering ‘I love you.’ He closes his eyes, holds her hand to his chest for just a moment, and then lets her leave.

And finally, Ryan is alone. Not normally something he seeks out, being alone, but if he can't see Nash yet, he can damn well still text him. If Chord hasn't also confiscated Nash’s phone.

In seconds, he's sent the message, and in another moment, his phone vibrates, still in his hand, and he presses on the screen.

SMS from NASHIE: breathe, baby.

The first breath is a push of air, as Ryan laughs, relieved for the connection.

Now his smile won't quit, as he smooths his hair back again, he raises his hands up to the edges of the front of his suit jacket, tugging gently. Takes another deep breath. Still can't stop smiling. He sits for a minute. On the daybed first, but then he moves to one of the chairs. Stands again, and finally leans against the wall, head bowed. He thanks God for a day like this, that he and Nash can share with the people who love them most.

He’s finally ready for the madness again.

He goes to poke his head out in the hall. Now he wants his dad, his mom, his brother, his sister.

And then, soon enough, his Nash.

***

Ian kind of can't help how much he loves his two best friends. And except for his own wedding day, to the beautiful Maggie, does everyone know Maggie? Isn't she beautiful? And funny? And smart? Except for that day, Ian has never been happier. He moves around Ryan, snapping photos when it's the exact right moment, trying not to interfere. Then around the area outside by the pond where they'll say their vows, in front of God even if the state doesn't recognize it, and in front of their closest friends and family. And finally with Nash, who keeps getting weepy and telling Ian how much he loves him. Later, he'll take the group photos.

He remembers taking their engagement pictures around the city, out at Nash's parents', out at the Folleses' (most awkward plural possessive ever) in Franklin, and out at the parks. His favorite is a candid when he was sure they didn’t know he was there, or existed. They've seen all the rest of his shots from that day, and he'd wrapped them up in a velvet box and given it as a gift, but he's going to give them the other one tonight after he gives his 'other best man' speech. In the photo, they're coming around the corner of the capitol building, and they've clearly just had a moment, Ian knows those kinds of moments, but if you didn't see it happening yourself the way Ian had and you didn't know them together quite as well as Ian did, and you didn't have those kinds of moments of your own with your Maggie, you might have missed the whole thing.

The tips of Nash's ears, his neck, and his cheeks are red, but all that shows up in the black and white is a solid ruddiness. Ryan's hair is completely disheveled in a way that makes him look even more charming and boyish, and they're holding hands, which they never do. Almost holding wrists, just keeping that connection. But it's the way they're looking at each other that gets Ian. He knows those kinds of looks, too. He's a study of humans and the way they interact with each other and the world. In the photo, Ryan is just barely smiling, his mouth is slightly open, cheekbones popping, chin pointed, jaw angular, and his eyes are burning into Nash's. Nash is looking at Ryan like he's all his, which he is. And Nash is grinning like it's Christmas and his birthday and the Preds have won the Stanley Cup and they just won their first Grammy, all rolled into one.

That grin took Ian's breath away when he snapped the photo, hoping he captured it, and he thinks he did.

***

They come in from different sides of the tent. No aisle, no flower girls (even though Tisha and Daysha had campaigned hard for the job), no frills there, but everyone they love, everyone who would support what they're doing today for each other, is there. It's under thirty people and it was pushing even that for Nash to get up and do this in front of people. He's not embarrassed because of course he's not. He loves Ryan. He loves Ryan more than anything but saying how he feels in front of people - unless it's to music, is something he's never been comfortable with at all.

Julie had insisted on a tent because she didn't want Nash and Ryan wearing sunglasses at the ceremony. Really, it was the only thing she'd put her foot down about and Nash was happy to oblige his Momma on this.

Chord stood in front of the flap to the tent's entrance and turned around. "You ready?"

Nash could hear the birds singing and the sun was shining and inside Phil is playing In My Life and honestly, he does feel a little sick. He yanks at the knot in his tie (Julie would understand), pulling it loose and unbuttoning his shirt at the neck. But, overall, he's more than ready.

[The Beatles - In My Life] (yeah, already posted this above, but just in case it's finished playing while you've read, here it is again. Because listening to the Beatles on repeat is never a bad thing, and because it's Wednesday, why not.)

Nash just nods at Chord, who pockets the tie and opens the flap. Walking through, most of everything is a blur except for his Mom in the front row, Chord at his back and Ryan ducking through the flap on the other side. Nash stands and waits for a second, just taking it all in, waiting for Ryan's eyes.

And then Ryan looks over.

Nash's stomach settles back down when he sees Ryan's face, Ryan's eyes, and then his nervous smile. He gets the once over and Nash grins back, knowing Ryan would (does) approve of his suit even though he's never seen it on Nash until right now (again, this time, Chordy had put his foot down).

Nash, too, drinks in Ryan's appearance. They stand, looking their fill, until Nash can feel Chord nudge him in the back. "Move, Nash."

His legs feel something like Jell-o but he concentrates on Ryan's face, his smile, and walks forward until they're finally standing in front of one another.

The man they'd found to 'officiate' their day begins to speak and welcomes everyone. The guy had spent time with everyone in his family and Ryan's family in the past week. Including Nash and Ryan, too. They'd gone out for supper and finally after a few drinks, Nash had lightened up enough to be able to talk about what 'Nash and Ryan' were like as a 'couple.' It was a pretty friggin' touchy-feely word that Nash didn't like. They just were what they were. No labels.

So, the man in front of them talked about how they'd finally started dating even though they'd already been in the band for a long time. Nash does pay attention. It's almost like someone is reading a book about them and it's a good story. It doesn't include their first night at the pond. It doesn't include Chord's dedication. It doesn't include Paul and Julie coming home.

But it does say that Ryan said something to Nash and finally, finally, Nash heard 'right'. He remembers saying that as clear as a bell. "I finally heard him right." and the man had smiled at Nash and said that was probably one of the best things he'd ever heard someone say about another person.

And then he hears what everyone else has said about them. How Julie had watched them out the window that morning and knew, just knew that her baby and his best friend were falling in love. Nash turns to look at his Mom, and she just nods back at him. They hear how Chord kinda knew, too, but they were still Ryan and Nash, who were just trying to save the world from bad music.

The crowd laughs and Nash shakes his head and smiles over his shoulder.

But it's what Ian has said that stops Nash's heart: "Oh yeah," the officiant quotes. "They're totally good for one another. Nash makes Ryan smile and Ryan makes Nash take care."

Ryan goes first, because he's so much better. He's the front man everywhere for them and Nash can't pick a better one for himself if he had to pick out of a lineup and when Ryan leans over and takes his hands, Nash's jaw clenches again.

"Nash," he says loudly, and then softer. "Nash." His thumb is rubbing over Nash's knuckles and Nash looks down for a second and then back up. And Ryan doesn't have a sheet of paper because he's probably got something made up in his head or winging it because Ry does that. He's perfect like that. He's perfect always.

"I tell everybody that I didn't like you when we met because that's the easy version. I didn't like you, not a bit because I knew - even then - that you'd change my life."

"Ry," Nash whispers before he can help it.

"And you did. You, changed my life so much. I met my best friends. And I wouldn't change any of it. Not one bit of it if it still gets me here with you today."

Ryan chokes up then and Nash reaches out touching Ryan's cheek, grounding him, grounding them. He can block everyone out as long as he's touching Ry.

"And everything we've gone through to get here..."

Nash knows Ryan's thinking about that night when Nash left and it guts him to know that he'd let Ry down that night.

Ryan shakes their joined hands and Nash can feel the tears in his eyes fall and he doesn't care. "After everything, I just don't want to do this with anyone else. It's so selfish of me, but I don't want to do this with anyone else. I don't think I can, but I sure know I don't want to. You're it for me, too, Nash."

The officiant turns to Nash and Nash nods back and looks at Ryan again intent on getting it out. Chord taps him on the arm and Nash takes the paper. The other, the one for just Ryan is in his inside pocket. He reaches in with his free hand and pulls it out.

"So, I was kinda saving this other one till later when it's just us, but...." he trails off and breathes in deep concentrating on Ryan's eyes. "Oh hell," Nash whispers. "Ryan, Ry, you kinda changed my life with six words and Pastor Grant here has it right. I heard you for the first time that night. I listened before because who can't? I mean you talk all the time and it's impossible to get a word in, but that night when you said you didn't stop looking at me, something flipped over."

Nash crowds in closer so he can put his hands on Ryan's face, so he can concentrate, so he can breathe.

"I won't always be nice and God knows I'm not as good as you are, but I'll always love you. Always, Ry. That I can promise."

"Rings?" Grant asks and Nash can feel the box against his arm as Chord holds it out. Nash reaches behind, grabs the box and when Grant asks, Nash slides the ring - the ring he's made - on Ryan's finger and says, "I do."

Nash watches as Ryan wipes his hands on pants and then takes the box from Jamie, removing the ring. Ryan nods at Grant and Nash holds out his shaking left hand. And then, the other ring is on his ring finger and Grant asks again, "Do you take this man?" and Ryan replies, "With all my heart, I do."

Ryan's grin is mile wide and Nash shakes his head and grins back. Grant says something else and he can hear their family and friends clapping, Nash steps in. It's a preview for later when everyone keeps tapping their glasses to make them kiss again and again, but this one Nash will remember forever. He cups Ryan's face and whispers 'I fucking love you' against his lips and kisses him.

***

Ryan takes a deep breath, thinks how silly it is to be nervous, but he still is. He’s not worried about standing up in front of their families and closest friends (there might be less than 30 people inside that tent, but they were literally the most important people in his and Nash’s life, and there’s no way this day would mean as much without them there to share it), because he loves Nash enough to shout it from the rooftops. No, it’s just all the built-up tension of not having seen Nash in nearly 24 hours, of Nash being right there on the other side of the tent with Chord. Ryan turns to Jamie beside him, not in front of or behind, but at his side. “Thank you, buddy.”

Jamie smiles that slow smile, and it makes Ryan grin even wider. “I didn’t have anything else to do today.”

Ryan half leans over laughing, just so happy to be here with his brother, and about to pledge the rest of his life, or longer, to Nash. He slings an arm around Jamie’s neck and kisses the side of his head. “I love you.”

“Save it for Nash,” Jamie says and scrubs at his face, shoving at Ryan’s side, but he’s still smiling that sweet smile he’s had since he was a baby. Ryan squeezes his shoulder, and Jamie says, pretend grudgingly, “Love you too, Rhino.”

Ryan closes his eyes, taking it all in, Jamie calling him by the nickname their granddad had used, making another memory. When he opens his eyes, there is a flash of the sinking sun off the face of his watch and he glances down at it, squinting to read the time. They have just a couple minutes before Jamie raises the flap on the tent.

Ryan flashes back to last night after rehearsal and after everyone had stuffed themselves at wherever it is they’d had dinner, and Chordy was being adorably and irritatingly insistent that Nash and Ryan wouldn’t see each other again until they walked into the tent today.

So they’d ridden to the Overstreets’ together in the back of Ian’s bro-in-law’s SUV (lalala, whatever). They could have shared a seatbelt they were so close. Nash’s legs tangled with and over Ryan’s, Ryan’s arms around Nash’s lower back, Nash’s hands pulling Ryan’s face closer and closer and closer. Livvy turned up the radio in the front, and Ryan concentrated on breathing, whispered “tomorrow night.”

Then they’d pulled up the long drive to Nash’s parents’ house, and the others made a lot of noise heading into the house. Nash had reached back to open his door, probably intending on dragging Ryan out and pushing him up against the door and-- No, Ryan thought, now. I need more, now. He pressed the tips of his fingers into Nash’s back, Nash groaned softly against Ryan’s neck and kissed his way up to Ryan’s jaw, and Ryan turned his head and tugged on Nash’s earlobe with his teeth, just this side of gently. They allowed themselves only a few minutes of groping and making out like teenagers before they slowed down, broke apart except for fingers entwined, talked about forever, and finally finally tumbled out and made their separate ways, Nash to his apartment over the barn, Ryan up to the house.

Now Ryan grins, shakes it off, because yeah, he’s about to walk out in front of their friends and families, and skinny pants don’t leave much to the imagination.

He counts to ten, blows out another breath, thinks not about Nash’s mouth on his skin, but about the first time Nash said I love you. Just the words, and what they did inside Ryan’s head. He’s sure that processing the language is just a function of biology or chemistry or something, but you can’t know what they do to your heart until you feel it.

Keith had come up to him last night and they’d talked about how when you love for real, you love forever. That’s what this’ll be with Nash, because Ryan is never letting him go now.

And Ryan can’t wait to have that matching ring back on his finger.

“It’s time,” Jamie says, and Ryan turns to him again, hearing the music now.

“Jamiesan...” Ryan starts, but can’t get the words right. Something important, about how much Jamie means to him.

“I know,” Jamie says, and Ryan figures he does, and this time it’s Jamie squeezing Ryan’s shoulder as he raises the tent flap with his other hand, and Ryan has to blink back tears.

But now there’s Nash in silhouette, the sun at his back, already under the tent across from Ryan. When Chord lowers the flap back down, Ryan can finally see Nash as they adjust to the dimmer light from the strings hung above them, so they pause and just look at each other. Ryan had known Nash’s suit was dark grey, but he hadn’t known about the black button up underneath it. Open at the collar, no tie, cufflinks, probably Nash’s grandfather’s. God, Ryan loves this man. Even with his silver snakeskin high tops.

Ryan grins as Nash’s eyes make it down from his striped shirt and lighter dove-grey colored suit to the blue boots on Ryan’s feet, and an eyebrow goes up, along with one corner of Nash’s mouth. It makes Ryan grin all over again.

They make their way slowly towards each other, to stand together and say their vows. Ryan has known what he wanted to say almost ever since Nash first dragged him up off the floor of the bus and slid the ring on his finger, both of them shaking and with tears in their eyes. He says them now, out loud for the first time (okay, except once earlier in front of the mirror in the borrowed room), and holds tight to Nash’s hands.

Nash’s words are simple and to the point, and so very Nash, and Ryan doesn’t understand why they’re waiting to kiss. Fuck tradition, Ryan always says (even though he really doesn’t), and what kind of tradition is there really in a “commitment ceremony” anyway? He starts to reach for Nash, and finds Nash already there, with that little half smile Ryan loves so much turning into the honest-to-god grin that makes Ryan burn. He grins back and leans in, kissing the man he’ll spend the rest of his life kissing.

***

Nash has got his jacket slung over the back of his chair and his vest is still done but his sleeves are rolled up. He's got an arm around the back of Ryan's chair, listening to their family go through, one by one, making speeches. Every once in awhile he reaches up and touches Ryan's neck just trailing his fingers across. Ian and his fucking camera catch him at it more than once but when Ryan looks over at him, Nash forgets everything around them.

And then someone will clink their glass which starts another round and the first time it happens, Nash is pretty sure his face is 900 different shades of red, but he leans over and kisses Ryan close-mouthed until Ryan whispers, 'I know you can do better than that, Nashvegas.'

Chord and Adam take over the DJ stage before the dance begins and Nash and Ryan are already laughing before they even start. Chord taps the mic and the feedback makes everyone groan.

“Give him a break,” Nash yells. “It’s obviously his first time.”

“OH, Big Brother,” Chord grins. “You just gave me the perfect segue. HIt it, Adam.”

The love theme to the Titanic begins playing and Nash groans turning his face into Ryan’s neck.

“So, the thing is, we’ve all been telling stories about how awesome and great Nash and Rk are, and trust me, they are. But, let’s revisit the night that I had to say goodbye to a beloved member of my family....my superman sleeping bag.”

“OH god,” Ryan laughs.

“Seriously, folks, it’s not bad enough that my big brother razzes the hell outta me to get me to go over to Amber’s the night before -”

“- didn’t hear you complain’,” Amber hollers.

Nash zips out of his chair to high five her and kisses her cheek while he’s there, for good measure. Settling back in his chair, arm around Ry who leans into him, Nash kisses the top of Ryan’s head.

“...between two manic phone calls from Nash where he is, at one point, spooning with Harley - that’s my dog, for those of you who don’t know - and a call from Ryan the day before, and trying to make time with Amber, you might ask yourselves when I got a degree in psychology? I was asking myself the same question.”

Everyone is laughing, eyes all on Chordy, while Nash watches Ryan’s face under the chinese lanterns and lights that Julie has strung up everywhere.

“And then there was literally radio silence. I texted Eman, because we all know he’s hella responsible -”

“- Hell yeah, I am,” Ian cheers from the crowd, and everyone laughs again.

“Right, so I texted Eman because Nash and Ryan weren’t answering their phones. Ian, being the responsible dude he is, calls me back. He and James were playing Black Ops -”

“Mario Kart!” Jamie hollers.

“Right, right, they were playing Mario but anyway, Ian tells me that RK took off with his vehicle and was headed out to the farm, out to here.”

“I almost had to pull over and puke,” Ryan whispers.

Nash tightens the grip on Ryan’s neck and kisses him again and again.

“The thing about being Nash Overstreet’s brother is you kinda forget that things are impossible.”

Everyone awww’s and Nash feels his face heat up again. Ryan’s hand is on his leg and grips tightly.

“Yeah, yeah, don’t give him too much credit yet. So, I texted Adam here because when I got off the phone with Nash, I was thinking things were pretty well settled between him and RK or I was hoping they were anyway. So, I called and requested a song, this song in particular for the newlyweds. To which Nash replied the next morning, here, hang on lemme grab my phone. I saved it.”

Nash is almost up and out of his chair when Ryan grabs hold and settles him back down.

“Calm, calm. He loves you. Let him have fun.”

“Ryan, seriously?”

“You’ll get him back later in classic Overstreet style. Stay.”

Nash closes his eyes and leans into Ryan’s forehead. “You so owe me later.”

“I don’t know if anyone told you this, but I’m kind of a sure thing.”

“God, you and movies. Get outta my face.” Nash kisses Ryan and turns back to Chord and Adam.

“Okay, I didn’t realize how much I obviously text with my brother, but here we go, found it:
Thanks for requesting that song, btw. Ry and I had a REALLY nice moment during it. And after it. And again this morning. TWICE.”

Everyone by now is dying of laughter of course and Ryan squeezes his leg again. “Nash, you are such a -”

“Shut it,” he whispers back.

“Twice, seriously?”

“It’s a thing. We don’t have to say who or whatever but we always have to say how many times.”

“You have like a record of how many?” Ryan asks, his mouth next to Nash’s ear.

And Nash can feel Ryan’s hand creeping up his thigh. Nash sits up straighter and moves Ryan’s scotch glass away from in front of his plate. “And that’s obviously enough scotch for you.”

Nash listens again as Chordy has everyone laughing and then raising their glasses again in salute.

And then his dad stands up. Nash sits up straighter in his chair, but his arm is still hung loosely around Ryan’s shoulders. Watching, waiting, Nash sees Paul hold out a hand and Julie stands up beside him. There’s a lump in Nash’s throat as he sees his Dad pull out a piece of paper as Adam walks the microphone over. He hands it to Julie and Nash clenches his jaw tight.

She clears her throat and Nash pulls his arm away from Ryan’s shoulder, threading his fingers together, elbows on his knees.

“You all know me, I’m Nash’s momma. And I’m not going to say much. I just want to welcome Ryan to the family.” She blows Ryan a kiss and sits back down again. Nash watches as she tilts her head up and then back down. Finally, their eyes meet. He mouths ‘Love you.’ She again, presses her hand to her mouth, and blows a kiss only this time it’s meant for Nash. He catches it, closes his fist tight around it and presses it to his heart.

Paul clears his throat and starts talking. Nash hears, but his eyes are all for his momma.

“Go on, go over there,” Ryan whispers in his ear and then Nash is on his feet, walking towards her.

Adam’s announcing that it’s time for dancing and people stand and mingle, wandering towards the makeshift dance floor. And Nash loses sight of her for a second but she’s there, still, waiting, too. He doesn’t stop or think and just grabs her up in his arms, holding tightly, breathing through. Two minutes or ten go by and he feels like he can lean back, can look at her again, and Nash does. She’s got tears running down her face and he huffs out a laugh, swiping his thumbs across her cheeks.

“Momma...”

“I’m a mess.”

“You’re the best mess here.”

She laughs then, too, and wipes at the tears on his face. He knows Ian’s snapping away somewhere and in the back of his mind he knows he’s going to look back on this moment and see that black and white picture of himself and his momma standing there with their hands on each other’s faces and it’ll take his breath away all over again. It will. What he won’t see until he flips through the leather bound book is Ryan and Paul standing by each other, Paul’s arm around Ryan’s shoulders and Adrienne holding tight onto Ryan’s hand. He won’t see it until a sunny Tuesday afternoon and when he sees that picture, he’ll turn to Ryan and won’t be able to speak, but Nash’ll kiss Ryan on the lips hard and won’t talk because he can’t say a word.

Now, though, there’s another picture as he laughs and backs his momma towards the dance floor and twirls her around as she puts her hand over her face and laughs. He pulls her close again and tucks her hand against his chest and they don’t talk about what this moment is or what it means but he knows...he just knows that they’re the same, in that moment, they feel the same.

Over Julie’s head he sees Ryan and Adam talking on the stage and when Adam points at something on his laptop and Ryan nods, Nash smiles. He knows his guy, his Ryan, and figures whatever this night has up it’s sleeve he can take it.

That’s until the song.

That fucking song.

[Jason Mraz - I Won't Give Up]

He knows that Julie squeezes his hand as she walks away, but he can’t feel anything, see anything, anyone, but Ryan. Ryan who’s walking down off the stage, who pulls the knot of his tie loose, who is walking slowly Nash’s way, and then lifts his hand and crooks a finger.

Nash can’t move though. His feet are glued to the ground with the sight of Ryan all unbuttoned, hair tousled, and eyes only for Nash. Then, he’s there in front of Nash. Slowly, Nash reaches out for Ryan’s waist, pulling him close. Ryan settles his hand on Nash’s hip and the other on Nash’s face. Leaning in, Nash kisses Ryan again and again and again. And then maybe they’re swaying along to the music, foreheads resting together.

They’re in the middle of the dance floor and couples are swaying alongside them, around them, but they can’t see it.

***

Eventually there is cake, and Ryan makes a face when he is too close to Nash, expecting to get cake rubbed in his hair at any moment. Something stops Nash though, and his eyes soften, and he gently places a bite of cake in Ryan’s mouth. It’s almost enough to make Ryan decide not to rub the cake in Nash’s face. Almost.

More pictures are taken, and people are mingling, but most are sitting, and there is always laughter.

Ian had thought he’d known what he wanted to say. He even had a folded up piece of yellow legal paper he’d stolen from Jason in his jacket pocket. He’d written it down, because even when he’s thought about something a lot, he can lose track of his train of thought once he starts talking. Or get distracted by something shiny, like Maggie’s smile. But sitting there at a table with his best friends, and watching their faces as Nash’s family gave their speeches, it felt like no words were enough. Especially when Keith and Adrienne played the song they’d written for Nash and Ryan. And Jamie had stood and said, simply, “For a long time, I was at least as oblivious as Nash that Ryan was in love with him. No offense, bro. I mean, Nash. Oh, hey, I guess you are my bro now, for real! But now their love is all I see.” Then the little dude raised his glass of champagne and instead of drinking, made a show of dinging the glass so Nash and Ryan would kiss again. It made Ian want to lean over and kiss Maggie’s cheek, so he did, and squeezed her shoulder.

Now he looks around and realizes it’s as good a time as any. He picks up the seafoam green cloth napkin from his lap as he stands and sets it on the table between his plate and Maggie’s. He walks over to the stage and the mic and glances down at Maggie again for good luck. He’s not used to being the one front and center on stage, all eyes on him. But he knows exactly what he wants to say, and he clears his throat.

“Hey, everyone,” he starts and even waves to the faces below. “I’m Ian. Actually, I think I know everyone here, but just to be safe. Anyway, I couldn’t be happier for these two guys. They’re two of my best friends, and they taught me about love before I even met Maggie, and before they figured things out about each other, because we’re a band, us and Jamie, and we love each other. A band is like a brotherhood, and ours really is, because not only are Jamie and Ryan actual brodres, but they make me feel like I’m one of them, too. I’ve known Nash since I was about fifteen, and I knew who he and his dad were long before that. You do that in a town like this. And the thing about Nash is, he’s always wanted this. He always wanted to be successful and loved, even when he thought it was only success that he needed.” Ian pauses for a second, his eyes still on Nash, and he watches Nash lower his head, then look up again.

Ian turns his eyes to Nash’s left, to Ryan. “I guess I met Ryan about a week or so after he and Nash started getting together to write and goof off and pretend to be a real band.”

“Hey! We were totally a real band!” Nash hollers, and Ian is thankful for the grin solidly back on Nash’s face, and he winks at him.

“Of course you were. Anyway, I didn’t know then that Ryan would end up being my favorite shopping buddy, and the guy I love to teach about food and taking pictures.” He’s still looking at Ryan, and he loves how the grin on Ryan’s face just gets bigger and wider. “But I knew right away something was really gonna happen this time for Nash with the music. And it did. They wrote songs, and they were out playing them for small and then slightly bigger crowds all over Nashville, at every dive bar or open mic that would take them. Y’all know, you all came out and supported them just like I did. And now, every time, every single time, I’m sitting backstage tweeting while they sing Emo on stage, I think about how our lives were then, and how blessed we were, but how much more blessed we are now.” Ian can’t help it, he looks at Maggie again.

“But no matter how good the music eventually was, and no matter how much bigger the crowds got, and no matter how many hits we had, or how many shows we played at the coolest places, something was always missing for these two guys. Until suddenly it wasn’t. I’ll be honest, I never thought about Nash and Ryan being together before they were. But even though Jamie and me, we used to give them hell about being pretend boyfriends, and it was a little surprising when everything all went down,” he allows for his own laugh thinking about the night he walked in on them staring at each other, “almost nothing has ever felt more right than this right here.” He waves his hand at Nash and Ryan, and they’re already grinning and they lean their heads together, and Ian knows, again, that now is the moment.

“I have a little something extra for y’all, actually.” He holds up one finger to say ‘just a second,’ moves quickly over to Adam’s DJ table, reaches under the cloth for the framed photo, and then walks back to the mic stand. He looks back out to their table and sees Ryan’s brow furrowed and Nash’s jaw clenched, like he might not be able to take whatever it is Ian’s about to do. But Ian knows Nash can handle it.

“Like I said, I know a lot about love. My family’s here tonight, hi Livvy, mom and dad. There’s another fine example. I’m lucky enough to be married to the most beautiful woman in the world, and I love her more and more each day.” This time, he doesn’t even pause to look at Mags, but just barrels right along. “But even as a photographer, it’s rare to catch it on film. In a portrait studio, you can spend frame after frame trying to get that perfect shot of mother and new baby, or a couple. And sometimes you do. Candid moments are usually the best way, though. Most of y’all know I took the ‘engagement’ photos for the guys.” He looks right at Nash and Ryan as he makes the air quotes with the fingers on the hand not holding their gift. “They dragged me all over the city, and I really think half the time, they forgot I was there.” They nod, because they had, and Ian steps away from the mic, holding up the frame a little, and walks over to them.

When he reaches them, he starts again, “This,” he turns the frame to face them, where not everyone can see it, but not hidden either, “this is love.”

Ryan stands, closing his mouth on his grin, but still grinning, and grabs Ian around the shoulders and neck for a one armed hug. One armed, because Nash still has a hold on him. Nash stands, and Ian sees his jaw is still clenched, so he shoves at Nash’s shoulder with the hand not holding the frame, and for just a second, Nash looks like he might lose it. But he looks down at the picture again. Ian can guess what he’s thinking. And then Nash is looking at Ryan, his hand moving to the side of Ryan’s face. Yeah, Ian captured it. It’s right in front of him all over again. Nash finally looks back at Ian and completes the circle, dragging him in by the neck. “Fucker,” Nash mumbles.

Then they’re laughing and Jamie is jumping into the circle, and Chord is there, and pretty much everyone comes over to see the photo, and then more cake, and champagne and whispering in Maggie’s ear, and dancing, and taking more photos, making more memories.

***

The porch swing sways back and forth in the breeze and Julie thinks the day couldn’t have gone more perfectly. Waving at Adrienne as she tucks a slightly tipsy Keith into the passenger seat, she laughs softly.

The music is winding its way down and has become slower and sweeter as the night wears on. The boys - oh, all of her boys, she sighs - are still dancing. Feeling something cold at her shoulder, Julie looks up to see Paul offering a glass of wine. Taking it gladly, she sips deep. And then, she turns her head as Adam screams elatedly something about Dawson’s Creek. Paul chuckles and settles in beside her tipping the swing to move further back with his foot to the porch floor.

[Beth Nielson Chapman - Say Goodnight, Not Goodbye

The song is slow and she watches her boys, Chord and Nash, with their arms around each other swaying as Tisha comes in on Nash’s other side. And then Adam. Then Ryan. Jamie. Anna. Summer, Skye, Harmony, Amber... Ian and Maggie. And soon it’s a great group of people and she can’t distinguish one body from another let alone their voices.

“Say goodnight....not goodbye....”

The words dance along the breeze up to where she’s swinging and Julie’s eyes fill again.

“Chordy and Amber did a great job singing,” Paul says, stretching to rest his arm on the back of the swing.

“Sure did.”

Julie closes her eyes and for a fleeting second she can see them standing up on Adam’s makeshift stage, looking into each other’s eyes while they sang to Ryan and Nash. Chordy, her sweetest child by far...it was just as bittersweet to watch him fall in love as it was to watch Nash, she thinks. Chord who met the world with a smile and Nash who stood back and watched everything.

[Colbie Caillat - Realize] (the song Amber and Chordy sang)

“C’mere,” Paul says, tapping his fingers on her opposite shoulder. Scooting over, she leans into his body, his shoulder, and sighs.

“God, they’re a pretty bunch, aren’t they?” Paul asks nodding his head towards the ‘dance floor’.

She can’t talk again because it’s her baby leaving home for good today. So, she nods.

“Aw, babe,” Paul chuckles. “You’ve always had lots of feelings.”

She laughs, too, quietly and elbows him.

“Shut up.”

And then he whispers something in her ear and she blushes but nods her head and she figures they won’t notice that all of the ‘adults’ are gone to bed. But she does turn as they’re about to walk in the door and looks over her shoulder. She can pick him out now. And just as she did at the table earlier, she blows them a kiss. Walking in the door, she flips on the porch light, and follows Paul upstairs.

***

They’re off to Bemidji or the Turks tomorrow as Ryan wants to lie on a beach with fucking umbrella drinks and Nash has no problem accommodating Ry on that. Even though he’ll come back one big freckle and peeling. Ryan’s worth all of it.

Chord played valet earlier and brought Ryan’s suitcases over to the apartment above the stables and after a quick kiss by the back door, Ry begs for a shower, and being thoroughly mellowed by whiskey and everything the day has been (overwhelming? perfect? Nash’s mind scrambles for the right word), he’s good with whatever.

Nash tosses his suit coat over a chair and toes out of his shoes. He can hear Ryan singing in the shower and smiles. Bracing his hand on the chair, he hears a foreign click. Looking over, there is his wedding band shining in the low lamp light. Grinning, he wiggles his fingers and taps his ring finger on the chair again. Shaking his head, Nash pulls his socks off and throws them wherever and walks over to the Bose. He flips it on and unbuttons his vest in between trying to find something decent to listen to. Cranking it up a little bit, Adam Levine is singing some club ass song and Nash nods along. His vest falls to the floor and he pulls the black button down out of his pants. He thanks Julie silently for letting all of the dogs sleep up at the house tonight otherwise they’d be hopping around at his feet wanting to dance, too.

[Maroon 5 - Payphone]

Fuck, this is catchy as hell.

He’s still nodding his head to the beat, unbuttoning one button at a time and pulling out his best club moves, Nash dances along to the beat.

“One more fucking love song, I’ll be sick,” he sings along, spinning. Nash looks up when he hears a chuckle.

Ryan’s standing in the doorway of the bathroom just grinning wide and Nash tilts his head back and laughs.

“Busted?”

“Busted,” Ryan replies.

“How much of that did you see?”

“Since you dropped your vest on the floor over there.”

“Fuck,” Nash says, laughing.

“Not a bad view. Could you turn around and do that again?”

“Fuck off, Ry. You say you prefer my ass end to my face?”

Ryan walks across the floor and he’s just wearing a towel, Nash notices in an abstract sort of way that you notice that the sky is blue or the sun shines, and Nash stands still. And then he’s there, close, and Nash watches as Ryan gives him a long, slow once over.

“Nash, I like the view coming or going.”

Ryan reaches out and pushes Nash’s shirt off one shoulder and then the other, letting it drop to the floor. Nash settles his hands on Ry’s hips, letting his fingers loosely settle on the sides while his thumbs run over Ry’s hipbones.

And then Ryan’s reaching again behind Nash and whispers in his ear, “Cool tune, but not really what I had in mind.”

Nash nods moving closer until he hears a soft song and grins into Ryan’s neck. “You are such a sap.”

“Says the man I married today.”

“Ry,” Nash whispers.

Ryan leans back, just far enough out of Nash’s reach that Nash has to look up, just slightly. “You were pretty amazing today.”

Nash wants to duck back into Ryan’s neck again, to bury his burning face in there and not talk about what happened today. Being on stage and being watched by fucktons of people is nothing compared to Ryan’s eyes right now. “C’mon,” Nash says, pulling Ryan back close again.

“Nash,” Ryan says, pulling back. “You need to hear this.”

“I did. I was up front with you remember?” Nash says, closing his eyes.

“God, you’re like a four-year-old sometimes.”

“Am not,” Nash replies.

“Fine, fine, you’re not. And even though you won’t open your eyes, I’m going to say it anyway.”

He can feel Ryan’s hands on his face and everywhere their bodies are brushing against each other, again, and Nash breathes out. The first kiss, he feels, is at his temple. The second, at his cheek. The third, at his chin. And the whole time, Ryan’s whispering.

“You. Were. Amazing. Perfect.”

Going by feel, Nash finds Ryan’s waist again, tugging on the towel and sending it flying and backing Ryan towards the bed.

“Seriously, enough talking.”

Right now, in this moment, he’s happy. Not that thing that borders on crazy like ecstatic but content and he does feel perfect when Ryan leans in and kisses up his neck and he’s backing Ry up. And then the bed is underneath them and Ryan’s skin is everywhere within reach. Nash slows etching it all into his memory; Ryan’s face, Ryan’s eyes, Ryan’s hands, Ry, Ry, Ry.

Tonight is for lingering.

Palm to palm, Nash pushes Ryan’s hands up by his head and rubs his cheek against Ryan’s.

“Fucking scruff burn,” Ryan whispers.

“You love it,” Nash replies, smiling against Ryan’s skin.

Nash moves his mouth to Ryan’s neck and down, stopping to kiss the tattoos on Ryan’s chest, brushing his lips back and forth over ‘love who my heart’s chosen’. Nash’s lips fit perfectly between Ryan’s ribs as he presses a kiss there and then to the jut of Ryan’s hipbone. Looking up, Nash grins.

Ryan’s got his eyes closed, arms out to the side, and hands gripping the quilt on the bed. Crawling back up, Nash kisses Ryan’s neck, leaning on his elbows above Ry. And then Ryan’s temple, Nash closes his eyes, and breathes in.

“Ry,” he whispers.

“Nash.”

And finally, again, their lips are together, brushing, and then opening. Nash can feel Ry’s hands drift down from his hair, to his shoulders, to his back. He wants to arch into the touch, so it might leave marks that he can look at tomorrow and remember now. Ryan’s everything he wants for always and gets to keep forever now.

And then Ry rolls them and Nash is looking up into his eyes. Nash’s breath catches in his chest and he reaches out.

The glint of his wedding ring stops him and Ryan turns his head, kissing Nash’s palm, kissing the cool metal of the guitar strings.

“My turn,” Ryan mumbles.

And then Nash can’t think beyond wanting.

When they’re tangled up in the sheets and the quilt is on the floor, Nash pulls Ryan close so they’re a puzzle of legs and arms but together under the white sheet. Ryan’s hand is over his heart, feeling, tapping.

“Your heart is still racing.”

“Well someone was revving it up a bit, fucker.”

“Didn’t hear you complain.”

“Gimme twenty minutes,” Nash says, kissing Ryan’s forehead.

The music plays on in the background as Nash turns his head to the side, resting against the pillow. He thinks about today, about his family, about their speeches, about seeing Ryan for the first time in twenty-four hours.

Hopping out of bed, Nash turns off all of the lamps, leaving the radio playing, and slides back in bed beside Ryan.

“Whatcha doin’?”

“Nothing.”

“Nash.”

“What are you talking about? Just wanting to get some sleep. Didn’t get much last night.”

“Yeah, right. Talk.”

Nash pulls at Ryan’s arms, arranging them again so Ryan’s back is against Nash’s chest. Ryan links their fingers together and when Nash feels the kiss pressed to their joined hands, Nash smiles.

“I just wanted to say....”

“Yes?”

“Already said yes.”

“Nash.”

He breathes in and then blows the breath out against Ryan’s neck. His voice is low and soft and Ryan can probably barely hear him over the music, but he finally spills what’s in his heart.

“I wanted to say thank you.”

“Thanks? For what?”

Ryan’s turning slightly, just turning his face to the side and Nash ducks his head into Ryan’s neck.

“Everything.”

Ryan’s letting loose of their clasped hands and turning around all the way this time and kisses Nash hard.

“Hang on. You’re about to get really lucky again.”

Nash laughs, but doesn’t complain....at all.