Archive of Our Own ^beta

The man was blue.

Arthur blinked rapidly, half convinced this was some sort of visual hallucination. 

The man remained blue.

"Two coffees and a blueberry muffin, please."

The blue man had just asked him for coffees and a pastry.  A blueberry muffin, actually, which felt like a joke, but didn't seem to be.  He was standing at the counter of Arthur's café, phone in one hand, a pleasant smile on his face, ordering a muffin, and he was blue.

"Name?" he asked, proud that his voice was mostly even.

"Merlin," said the blue man.  Because of course it was.

"Right," Arthur couldn't help but scoff, although he immediately regretted it.  This was why he shouldn't have to deal with customers.

"It is, though," the man insisted, looking amused at Arthur's rudeness.  "But I'll tell my mum you don't approve."

"Sorry," Arthur said, wanting to die a little.  This whole interaction had been surreal and he wanted it to be over with.  "You can put your card in there and I'll go get your coffees."

Grateful for the reason to step away, he observed the blue man - Merlin, apparently - as he started messing with his phone.  The blue was a bright cobalt color for the most part, but it had some contour to it, dark almost-black blues and lighter blues.  His brown curls were untouched at the top, and he had on a basic black t-shirt and jeans over it, so the paint or makeup or whatever it was must be smudge proof, or he must not have cared much about the state of his clothes.  It was surprisingly well done, if wildly inappropriate for Arthur's café.  He'd designed it to be the kind of place that was comfortable but sophisticated.  Well, Gwen had, but still.  Why would anyone come into his place looking like this?

It was relief to hand Merlin his coffee and muffin and say stiffly, "Have a nice day."

The blue man grinned and saluted him with his cup.  "'Til next time."

Arthur frowned as he left.  What was that supposed to mean?

*

"What is so funny about this?"

"Arthur, a man showed up to your café looking like a Smurf, how is that not hilarious?"

"He didn't look like a Smurf," Arthur huffed at Morgana, although he wasn't sure why he felt the need to clarify.  "It was artistic looking, at least.  But what was he thinking going out in public like that?"

Morgana rolled her eyes at him, lounging elegantly in his favorite armchair, which he had somehow ceded to her.  "Ah, yes, how dare he be colorful in public."

"It's not like it was his clothes or even makeup.  His skin was blue!"

"Were you a pompous ass to him?  We've told you, you can't be condescending to your customers if you want them to come back.  You don't have our father's money to make it go down easier anymore."

Arthur glared.  "I left a seven figure paycheck to run a café, how am I pompous?"

"I have no idea and yet there you are.  The way you're pulling it off while wearing an apron is especially impressive."

He looked down at himself and tried not blush when he saw his apron with the little knight on the top.  He'd forgotten to take it off when he'd gotten home, apparently.

"All I'm saying," Arthur attempted to get the conversation back on track, "is there are some things you should know better than to do in public."

"Ah, yes, the unspoken rule of not wearing paint on your skin to coffee shops."

"You're no help," Arthur grumbled petulantly.

"If he comes back, take pictures."

*

Two days later, a werewolf walked into Arthur's café.

"You've got to be kidding me," he said before he could stop himself.

It didn't seem to bother Merlin, who beamed under all his prosthetic fur.  "Hello again."

"Are you in a TV show?  A play?"

"No."

"Big Michael J. Fox fan, are you?"

Merlin laughed, eyes sparkling under his big wolf eyebrows.  "Nice one.  I'd've gone for an updated reference, maybe the Teen Wolf TV series, or Vampire Diaries."

"Those aren't that new either," Arthur pointed out, instead of saying he hadn't seen either.

"The TVD spinoff only just ended, they had a couple werewolves on there.  Could've said I was a Jed Tien fan, he was hot and queer, although I suppose that's a bit niche." He didn't let Arthur respond to this information, which was probably for the best as he had no idea what in the world Merlin was talking about. "I'll take a cappuccino."

"Of course," Arthur said, politely and professionally, "coming right up."

As he started the drink, Merlin leaned on his counter.  It was the midmorning lull, so there was just one businessman working on his laptop in the corner, an old couple sitting in one of the booths, Lance back in the kitchen, and the two of them.  "So why Excalibur?" he asked, pointing at the name of the café printed on the napkins.  "Isn't it a bit intense for a coffee place?"

"It's distinguished," Arthur bit back immediately.  "It stands for honor and doing the right thing."

"So it's not just that your name is Arthur?"

He almost dropped Merlin's drink before glaring suspiciously at him.  "How the hell do you know that?"

Merlin tapped his chest and then pointed at Arthur's.

He looked down to see his name tag pinned to his shirt.  "Oh."

When he glanced back up at Merlin, the werewolf was definitely smirking, in spite of his fake teeth.  "I guess you and I were destined to meet."

"I don't believe in fate or fairytales, Mer-lin."

"You own a shop called Excalibur, you can see where I'd be confused."

"Here," Arthur snapped, shoving his cappuccino in his hand.  "Have a nice day."

"Thank you.  See you soon," Merlin said, waving happily before leaving.

Arthur only just managed not to bang his head against the counter.

*

He didn't see Merlin for the rest of the week, but on Friday George, who had taken the morning shift, said an alien had asked about him.

*

On Monday, Merlin walked in looking like he'd been in a paintball war.  Unlike the blue, this time he was many colors, none of them seeming purposeful, and they were on his clothes as well.

"What?" Arthur asked, too bewildered to say anything else.

"What?" Merlin asked, apparently genuinely confused as he walked over and leaned up against the counter.  "One of your lemon scones, please."

"Get off!" Arthur said, waving a rag at him until stood up again.

"Excuse you, prat!"

"Excuse you, you stupid, careless - look at what you did!"

Merlin looked around, completely bewildered, until his face froze and then dropped, eyes glued to the paint stains on the counter.  "Oh."

"Is that all you have to say for yourself?"

"I'm sorry," he added hastily, his hands held up both in pleading and for practical, paint-related reasons.  "I was in a hurry, I didn't think ..."

"In a hurry to do what, exactly, reenact 10 Things I Hate About You?" Arthur asked as he sprayed water and soap on the counter and rubbed at it with his rag.

"No, in a hurry to see ... never mind," Merlin said, his ear tips turning pink.  "Your references are so old.  Have you not seen Do Revenge yet?"

Arthur threw his rag to the side and grabbed some hand wipes from under the counter, then returned to Merlin and pulled him in by his hands.  "Stay still," he commanded before beginning to scrub at them.

"Ow," Merlin said pitifully.

"Don't be a baby, Merlin."

"You're taking my skin off!"

"Well, that'll teach you to get paint on other people's things, idiot."

"It was an accident, dollop head."

"What the hell's a dollop head?"

"You are."

Arthur rolled his eyes and abandoned the hand wipe he was using and grabbed a new one.  "And getting it in your hair, you are the messiest person I've ever seen," he griped, reaching out to get a particularly wet spot on Merlin's neck.

It wasn't until Merlin was both silent and still for several seconds together that he realized he had one hand caressing Merlin's neck and the other holding his hand.  And when he realized this, instead of letting him go, he looked into his eyes.

Merlin had really nice eyes.  Somehow, with all the paint and prosthetics, he'd never noticed.

Then he registered that he was rubbing his thumb along Merlin's hairline, and Merlin was leaning into it, so he snatched his hands away and took a big step backwards, hitting the edge of the back counter and almost loosing his footing.  "Scone, you said?"

"Yeah," Merlin replied, looking dazed.

"Just a moment."

He grabbed the scone and stuffed it into the bag in record time, holding it with his full arm outstretched.  "Have a nice day."

And Merlin, who had recovered from his daze, had the nerve to wink at him.  "Oh, I'm already having an excellent day."

Then he sauntered out of the café.

*

He came in the next day and then again on Thursday.  Both times his replies were flirtier, his body language more suggestive, and when he let his fingers trail on Arthur's when he took his espresso from him, Arthur almost dropped the hot coffee on them both.

He wasn't sure what was more embarrassing - that Merlin was having this effect on him, that Merlin clearly knew it, or that he had it while dressed up as some sort of swamp creature.

*

"You like him."

"What?" Arthur blustered as his sister stared him down gleefully in his living room, sitting in his chair.  It occurred to him that the people in his life didn't have enough respect for his spaces.

"You do!  I can't believe it.  You fancy the Smurf."

"He's not a ... I don't ... shut up."

Morgana leaned forward, looking positively cheerful, which on her was honestly a bit off-putting.  "When can I meet him?"

"Meet - never!  Whatever you think this is, it isn't, I promise you."

Her expression darkened. "Arthur, when was the last time you went out with someone?"

"Lance, last year."

"That was only for a couple weeks before you hired him at the café."

Arthur shrugged.  "So I haven't dated anyone in a while.  I have a new business to get off the ground and dating apps are awful.  Not everyone has to be in a relationship."

"No, but you want to be.  You always have.  That's why you got moon eyes for everyone you ever dated, even the ones who really didn't deserve it."

"Morgana -"

"I want you to be happy, Arthur." He was struck dumb with the sincerity in Morgana's voice.  "Sometimes ... sometimes it feels like I've stolen your life.  You left our father's company because you knew he'd never let me run it if you stayed and the last serious relationship you had was with my girlfriend.  Now you work all the time, you always seem tired, and if I didn't come by to annoy you, you'd spend most of your nights alone."

He shook his head and managed, "It was never like that.  I hated working for Uther, and Gwen and I never would have worked out in the long run.  You don't have to worry about me."

"Don't tell me not to worry about you," she said softly, looking more vulnerable than he was used to from his sister.  "All I'm saying is that if Merlin could make you happy, don't let that get away from you because of the way you met or because you're nervous."

He sighed, feeling caught out and wrong footed, but agreed, "Alright."

"Good.  So when do I meet him?"

*

The answer was much sooner than Arthur would have liked.

Gwen coaxed him and Morgana out to the pub for an evening so they could spend time with her brother and Lance.  Arthur practically lived in a pub when he was younger, but these days he had to be up before the sun every morning so he preferred a quiet night in.  But he hadn't been out in ages and the thought of a beer and a burger and maybe some darts sounded like exactly what he needed.  And maybe he wanted to show Morgana that he was doing just fine in his new life, on his own.

Of course, as soon as they found a table and sat down, he spotted Merlin.

He was sitting with three men, one of whom had a few paint stains of his own on his jeans.  For the first time ever, Merlin was dressed like a normal person.  Well, mostly normal - he had on a brown, slightly lumpy jacket and a scarf-thing even though it was summer.  None of it did anything to distract from his soft curls and his impressive cheekbones and nice lips that stretched into a gorgeous smile as soon as he spotted Arthur and oh, God, he'd been attracted to him when he was a swamp thing, this was going to be a disaster.

Merlin got up and made his way to their table, leaning on an empty chair and beaming.  "Hello, Arthur."

He swallowed and nodded.  "Merlin."

Morgana turned her head slowly, her expression like it was when she was a child at Christmas, before she got older and scary.  "You're Merlin?"

"Well done, Arthur," he heard Gwen mutter admiringly under her breath.

He barely fought past the urge to run out of the pub and never come back.

But then Gwen, angel that she was, took hold of the situation.  "Lovely to meet you Merlin," she said warmly.  "I'm Arthur's friend, Gwen, and this is his sister Morgana."

"Likewise."

"But," Gwen said, tugging on her resistant girlfriend's arm, "we need to go look for my brother and his friend, so we'll be back in a bit.  Have fun without us!" And then with a particularly strong yank, she pulled a protesting Morgana through the crowd towards the bar.

Merlin instantly dropped into the chair next to Arthur's.  "So you live near here, huh?"

"And I never used to see you around, so I'm guessing you don't."

"Nope.  My best friend Will does, and my friend Gwaine's boyfriend, so I'm trying to come by more often.  It's a bit more posh than I'm used to," Merlin said, looking around with a critical eye, "but it's not bad.  Your café is downright cozy."

"I don't know if that's the word I'd use, but thank you."

"Yeah, too bad the owner is such a prat."

"Hang on," Arthur objected, bristling.

"I'm just saying, when I first came in, you were rude first."

"Fair point," Arthur said sheepishly, because in hindsight, that was probably true.  "I'm hoping we'll be profitable by next year so I can hire more help and I won't have to take any more shifts at the register." He cleared his throat and felt the back of his neck heat.  "I have been told that I, uh, am not best suited for customer interactions."

Merlin grinned.  "I can't imagine why."

"Shut up."

"It wasn't so bad, really," Merlin said.  "Besides, I'm an artist, and I teach classes sometimes, too.  That's hardly the meanest anyone's been to me."

"So you're working on something?" Arthur guessed.  "That's why you're all -" He waved his hand to gesture the many different things he'd seen Merlin in.

"Sort of. My friend Will wants to get into stage and effects makeup, and I have a project I needed help with.  It's a 3D piece, y'see, lots of small parts to paint.  So I let him practice on me, and he helps me with mine."

"And you're fine going out like that?" Because, in spite of himself, and in spite of Arthur's protests to Morgana, that was the part he couldn't wrap his head around.  Maybe he was a bit pompous.  And a dollop head, whatever that was.

Merlin shrugged. "Why not?  Most people think it's funny.  Plus it takes some time to get off, and after sitting still that long I usually just want to take a walk, get the jitters out." He grinned.  "But after that first day, I mostly just thought it was funny how much it bothered you."

"I might worry too much about how I present myself," Arthur admitted grudgingly.  "Or, my father did, and I picked it up from him."

"Rich arsehole?  I could kinda tell."

"I think I should find that insulting."

"That's what I was going for, yeah."

"Of course," Arthur said, laughing in spite of himself.  "You're very rude, aren't you, Merlin?"

"Again, you laughed at my name first!  And called me an idiot.  And scrubbed me until I bled."

"You didn't bleed, idiot, and you got paint all over my counter."

"I am sorry about that," Merlin said, serious.

"I may have overreacted about that, too," Arthur said, his shoulders hunching a little.

"You seem to really love your café."

"I do.  I ... um.  I bought it with the trust fund my mother left me that I got when I turned twenty-five.  It got me free of my father and it was way to ... I don't know, remember her, I guess.  She used to take me to a place just like it when I was a kid.  It was our special thing.  And she liked to tell me King Arthur stories, so ..."

"Excalibur," Merlin finished, nodding in understanding.  "That's very sweet, Arthur."

His face twisted, and he protested half-heartedly, "It's not sweet."

"It is, though.  My mum used to let me paint on the walls at home.  I think it was so I wouldn't be sad when the kids at school teased me about my big ears and not having a dad, but either way, it helped me fall in love with art."

"So that's why you think getting paint all over everything is no big deal."

"Clotpole."

Arthur laughed again, and reached for his beer, but somehow ended up with his hand on Merlin's instead.  Rather than shake him off, Merlin flipped his palm up so they were holding hands and asked, "Is your flat very close?"

Heart hammering, Arthur said, "Yes."

Then he was dragged out of the pub by a determined Merlin, with some whistles from Merlin's friends and shouted encouragements from Morgana and Gwen.  And maybe Merlin was already rubbing off on him because he wasn't embarrassed one bit.

*

"You've got paint on your neck."

They'd been dating for a month, and Merlin had behind-the-counter privileges now, which he usually used to steal pastries.  Will had moved on from prosthetics to exaggerated stage makeup, so Merlin was leaning on the back counter, munching on a croissant that somehow wasn't moving his bright blue lipstick that matched his chartreuse eye look, which evidently made him too busy to let Arthur know about his sullied neck until a few dozen customers had already come through.

Arthur groaned. "How did you get paint on me?"

"You got paint on yourself when you insisted on sex in the living room this morning," Merlin countered with a fond smile.  "Here, get me a wipe."

Arthur handed it to him, and stood stoically as Merlin scrubbed unnecessarily hard at him, to be a good example for Merlin the next time he did it to him.  "Is it gone?"

"Yes, you vain prat, it's gone." Arthur wanted to be properly insulted, but Merlin followed this up by kissing his neck right above where the paint had been, and then a lingering kiss on his lips; just a bit too long to be work appropriate, but Arthur couldn't find it in himself to complain.

"See you tonight," Merlin whispered, kissing him one more time and then pulling back, smirking.  "You look perfect."

"Ha-ha," Arthur said dryly, smoothing down his hair from where Merlin had mussed it while he was kissing him.  "See you tonight."

He probably should have been suspicious by how happily Merlin strolled out of the café, instead of moaning about how he hated teaching classes and couldn't he stay here with Arthur, please - but he somehow didn't realize anything was up until an older man came up to the counter, looked up from his phone and did a double take. 

"Sir, is there something wrong?"

"No, I was just surprised." He gestured vaguely around Arthur's neck and mouth, then said, "You've got something blue on you."