Archive of Our Own ^beta

Beau pounded on the door of the familiar small cottage just outside of Rexxentrum. She knew it was rude of her to show up to Caleb's house at the ass crack of dawn but Caleb's tendency to send messages late at night was just as rude and Beau needed to talk to someone before she exploded.

She felt like the weight of the world rested heavy in her pocket.

It was just her luck that the door swung open to show an unfamiliar face with a very familiar expression that read "I'm done with your antics and you only just got here".

"He's still asleep but you are welcome to wait until he wakes up," Essek said, dropping his disguise and stepping aside to let Beau in. "Unless it's something I can help with."

"No, I'll wait," Beau replied, not really in the mood for Essek's version of pleasantries.

Essek nodded and headed towards the living area. He settled into a chair by the fireplace and picked up a knitting project he must have set aside to answer the door. A fluffy gray cat jumped into his lap and started to make biscuits, as Caleb called them, on his knee.

It was still odd sometimes seeing Essek like this, knowing the things he'd done over the years. He could crush someone in an instant with magic and yet here he was knitting what looked like a sweater.

Then again she couldn't really judge as Yasha had used the Magician's Judge to harvest her garden just the week before.

Beau shook off the thought. Yasha was why she was here and Beau didn't want to dwell on the issue until she could talk to Caleb. Though, like a dam leak, once the thought of Yasha entered her head, Beau couldn't fully shut it down.

She must have been more antsy than she thought as Essek looked up from his project with a raised brow.

"Are you sure there's nothing I can help you with?" Essek asked.

Beau really wanted to talk to Caleb but Essek seemed very determined to help, even if it was just to get her to leave. He might, unfortunately, also prove more useful than Caleb.

"You're from Xhorhas," Beau said, gesturing over Essek.

Essek's other brow raised to meet the first. "Astute observation."

"I just mean, you and Yasha are from the same place," Beau replied, ignoring the reproachful look Essek gave her. "I kind of fucked up and I'm not sure how to fix things cause I bought this jade ring but then I realized maybe Xhorhas does things differently but it was really expensive and I don't know how to ask Yasha to marry me anymore."

Beau stopped her rant as she turned back to Essek. She hadn't even realized she stood up to pace until she turned back to her best friend's HotBoi, or whatever they called themselves. Caleb claimed friends but Beau was calling bull on that, or maybe translation error. Common wasn't his first language after all.

Essek looked slightly terrified at her tirade. The last time she'd seen that face on Essek was in Aeor, which was only a slight bit insulting.

He took a deep breath and set aside his sweater. "Firstly," Essek said, giving her the same look he had when offered a White Xhorhasian, "Yasha and I are from two completely different parts of Xhorhas. It's like saying you and Caleb or Fjord and Jester are from the same place. Kamordah and Blumenthal are no more similar than Port Damali and Nicodranas or Rosohna and the wastes are. I can tell you what I know of the tribes Yasha likely came from but I don't know their marriage rites. Secondly, I do not think it matters."

Beau stared at him in disbelief. "What do you mean you don't think it matters?" Beau demanded. "I want to do this right for Yasha. I don't want our life together to start off on the wrong foot."

Essek looked at her, or maybe past her, for a moment before gesturing for her to sit back down.

"I do not know what tribe Yasha is from but there are some universal similarities," Essek said, nodding down to the holster Caleb gave Beau to keep her journal in.

Beau took the cue and pulled out her notebook to take notes.

"They all tend to have their intricacies regarding marriage but most of them operated off of arranged marriages given to them by the gods," Essek continued. "The heads of the tribes would bless and perform the union. A marriage outside of the blessing of the tribal leader would be considered cursed bringing bad luck either to the couple or even the whole tribe."

Beau stopped writing and looked up at Essek. Suddenly she understood exactly what Essek had meant when he said it wouldn't matter.

"They don't propose," Beau said.

Essek nodded.

Beau suddenly imagined a younger Yasha and her best guess at what Zuala may have looked like, standing before the shadowy leader of their tribe, requesting permission and being turned away. Her and Yasha had no way to ask her tribe, and even if they did, Beau was sure the answer would be a resounding no.

Would Yasha even want to marry again knowing it would be cursed the same way as her first marriage within her culture?

"So, we can't get married then?" Besu asked. The question nearly caught in her throat and Beau swallowed back her tears.

Essek tilted his head. "You are misunderstanding me," he said, looking up at the ceiling as if it would give him answers. "I grew up in the Dynasty. With my family's standing there were certain expectations I grew up with. Caleb fits none of those expectations."

Beau frowned at the topic change but decided against brushing Essek off. At the very least he was admitting he and Caleb were more than friends.

"Within the Dynasty I would have needed to marry someone of similar or higher standing than myself. Our union would have needed the blessing of both Umavis and would have been led by the Umavi of the higher house. They would then be gifted to my Den or I their's," Essek continued. His gaze drifted towards the stairs where Caleb was still sleeping.

"Caleb is not of proper standing even as a hero of the Dynasty. He has no Umavi to bless a ceremony, nor would he likely be accepted into Den Thelyss," Essek explained, his gaze still distant. "Even without my banishment and subsequent execution should I ever return home, Caleb and I would not be easily married under my homeland's customs. I'd marry him anyway. Do you understand me now, Beauregard?"

Beau wanted to say yes. That she knew there was no tribe for Yasha to go back to. That the place Yasha and her went to see Zuala's grave was next to a trashed camp that hadn't been disturbed by people in years. That Yasha, like Essek, could both miss her home and yet never feel a real desire to return to it or hold on to certain practices.

Still, something inside her clung tight to the idea of doing this right, of not fucking up the most important thing in her life like she did so many other things.

"Beauregard," Essek said, his gaze locking on hers, "give her the ring and don't worry about whatever is stopping you."

There was a pause, where Beau and Essek both held their breaths, before Essek suddenly exploded into motion.

"Good morning, Caleb. Beauregard is here to see you. I shall make breakfast."

Between one breath and the next, Essek was out of the living room and in the kitchen. If Beau didn't know better she'd think he had teleported.

Even Caleb looked befuddled where he stood at the bottom of the stairs in his pajamas.

"Uh, everything good between you and Essek?" Beau asked, looking between Caleb and the kitchen door that had just slammed shut.

"Ja?" Caleb replied, though it sounded like more of a question. "What were you two talking about?"

Beau sighed but brought Caleb up to speed. He was who she initially came to talk to anyway. When she was done, Caleb looked like she'd smacked him in the face.

"I just don't want to fuck it up, Cay," Beau finished.

Caleb frowned down at her. "We are a couple of dummköpfe," he said, moving towards the bookcase. He pulled something down from behind one of the books before plopping next to her on the sofa.

"I don't know what that means but I'm inclined to agree," Beau replied.

Caleb held out a small box to her. "Trade?" he asked, an unamused smirk pulling at the corners of his mouth.

Beau nearly laughed as she took the box, handing Caleb a similar one. Inside Caleb's was a solid gold band. Not the typical color Essek would wear. It would draw the eye just simply by being different from his other jewelry.

"Why jade?" Caleb asked, tilting the ring box to watch the stone catch the light.

"Kamordah tradition. Why gold?" Beau asked.

Caleb snorted. "Blumenthal tradition," Caleb replied, biting his lip.

He handed her back her ring and she returned his as they both tried to stop themselves from laughing at such an inappropriate moment.

It wasn't funny but it was also very funny.

"Essek's right," Beau muttered, once she was sure she and Caleb wouldn't collapse into a pile of uncontrollable giggles.

"Do not let him hear that. He will be smug about it all day," Caleb replied.

"Maybe he should be. I was focusing so much on not fucking things up, that I was starting to miss the point," Beau said.

"Well, if we are no longer trying to get it perfect, may I offer a suggestion?" Caleb asked.

Beau squinted at him in suspicion. "What?"

"Double wedding. Jester plans. I think she could do great things with Brautentführung," Caleb suggested.

"I don't know what that means," Beau replied.

Caleb leaned in close. "It's a tradition where the bride is kidnapped. In this case Essek and Yasha," he whispered.

Beau considered it seriously for a moment. "Fine, double wedding but Jester only plans the Bra-ant-few-thingy," Beau said, holding out her hand.

"Deal," Caleb said, shaking her hand. "Here's to fucking up on purpose."

The idea of intentionally doing things wrong ate at some deep inner part of Beau but the rest of her felt invigorated and free.

"To fucking up on purpose," Beau repeated. "Thanks Caleb."

"Eh, it was mostly Essek," Caleb replied, nodding towards the kitchen.

"Yeah, I'm not thanking him. It's not good for his ego," Beau joked.

"I can hear you," Essek replied, through the door. "You are welcome."

"Whatever," Beau said, rolling her eyes. "I've got a hot girlfriend to propose to."

She glared down at Caleb. "Don't you dare propose before me," she said.

"Better hurry," Caleb joked. "Mine's only in the next room over."

"Caleb Widogast, if you propose to me over burnt waffles I'm spending the night with Jester," Essek called back.

Beau laughed on her way out as Caleb rushed to apologize.

The ring in her pocket suddenly felt much, much lighter than when she first got here.