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Published:
2023-11-20
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Practice Kissing

Summary:

Chat Noir's had enough of helping Ladybug "practice" kissing. It just hurts too much, knowing she only wants to impress some other guy.

Ladybug probably should have made it clear that he's the guy she wants to impress.

Notes:

I ignored my other WIPs and wrote for fun today. This is (one of) the result(s).

Thanks to noodles for betaing!!

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Work Text:

Before she pulls away, Ladybug smiles against Chat Noir’s lips. Her fingers tighten in his hair, and she sighs in contentment as he struggles to remember how to breathe. Every time, he’s undone by her.

Every time, it’s perfect.

But every time, it also ends.

She leans back, calves still hugging his thighs as she settles in his lap. One hand slides down his chest, giving his bell a lazy flick. She giggles. But no matter how hard he tries to laugh with her, no matter how real the look in her eyes seems, all he can feel now is the lump in his throat.

Sliding his hands up her back, he pulls her closer. He buries his face in her hair, not to inhale its sweet cinnamon scent, but to hide. If he cries, he can’t let her see it.

But this time, nothing stings the corner of his eyes. He must finally be getting used to this.

Ladybug relaxes in his arms, and her face finds the crook of his neck. She presses a kiss there, too. He shivers.

Every time Ladybug stops kissing him, he remembers this isn’t real.

“So, Chaton…” Her words slip sensually through the air, as if her lips are still caught in the rhythm of moving against his. Her breath tickles his ear. “How was that one?”

Not real, he reminds himself. Even though he can still taste cherry lip gloss.

“Hmm…” His thoughtful hum—played up for dramatic effect, so that Ladybug knows he’s oh-so-one-hundred-percent okay with this—goes on long enough that she laughs again, reclining to send him a look that makes his heart do cartwheels. “One billion out of ten.”

Her huff of amusement lacks the commitment he expected. “Come on, Minou. Be serious.”

It’s so, so hard—unbearable, really—to stick to their routine. Light banter, meaningless jokes, and lately the occasional kiss or two. That’s all he means to her, and he knows that.

He has no right to be disappointed. Not when she’s always been so upfront about what she wants. Or rather, what she doesn’t want.

So he stretches a well-practiced smile onto his face. If she notices it growing a little weary near the edges, he’ll just say he’s tired.

“I’m super serious, Buginette. Every moment with you is pure perfection.”

She fights against a smirk—a battle she quickly loses. “If you keep saying that, how am I supposed to get any better?”

Right. Because this is just practice to her.

Not real, not real, not real.

Chat sighs, sliding out from underneath her and only feeling a little bad for the startled squeak she lets out as she rolls off of him. He’s had enough of this.

“Sorry,” he mumbles. “Just…give me a minute. I’ll think of something.”

“Oh. Okay…”

It’s not long before he misses her warmth; winter air whips around him, finding all the spots his suit can’t quite protect. But he needs this moment to himself. He needs to gain some clarity.

Then again, there’s not much to be found when Ladybug is right there. Especially when she crawls up to him, her hand sliding against his thigh.

“Hey…” Her teeth chatter in the wind, and it takes everything he has not to pull her right back into his arms. “Did I do something wrong?”

“‘Course not.” He stares at a nearby street lamp until his vision starts to blur.

“Then why won’t you look at me?”

Chat shrugs. “I’m just doing what you asked me to. Trying to give you pointers to impress that guy you’re in love with.”

“That guy I’m in love with? Why are you saying it like that?”

“How the hell am I supposed to say it?” He leaps to his feet, feeling a little bad when Ladybug shrinks back from him. It’s not enough to make him stop, though. “You know how I feel about you. How I’ve always felt about you.”

“W-well, of course I do. But I don’t understand why—”

“How?! How can you not understand?” Chat drags his hands though his hair, wincing when a claw snags one his cat ears. He starts pacing, wringing his hands to shake off the pain. “What’s so complicated about the idea that maybe—just maybe!—I’m not totally thrilled about helping you practice kissing for some other guy.”

“But—”

“And I know I said I was okay with it. I know I did. But I—” His voice catches, and he nearly chokes as he swallows down a sob. “I’m not, okay? I c-can’t do this anymore.”

“Chat Noir…” Ladybug’s voice sounds off, but he can’t exactly put his finger on how. He doesn’t know if she’s upset, or annoyed, or pissed.

He wouldn’t be surprised if she’d finally had enough of him.

Her next question doesn’t clarify her feelings. “Are you actually… Are you saying you’re jealous of the guy I’m practicing for?”

Chat just glares at her until his eyes decide that now they’re ready to burn with tears. Then he crosses his arms and turns away, gulping down air that cuts him all the way down. And Ladybug…

She bursts out laughing.

What the fuck?

“I’m so glad this is funny to you.”

“No, no, no.” He hears her clamber to her feet and start towards him. “Minou, you don’t understand.”

“Maybe I don’t want to.”

There’s a sharp intake of breath as she stops behind him. “I think you do.”

“Ladybug…” Her name on his tongue is both a whimper and a prayer.

She rests a hand on his back, rubbing gently up and down. He wants to pull away, but he’s powerless under her touch.

“Just let me tell you about the guy I’m in love with,” she says.

“Perfect,” Chat responds, but his sarcasm—and the way his heart is shrivelling in his chest—apparently isn’t obvious enough to deter her.

“He’s wonderful,” she gushes. Why settle for simply stabbing him in the back when she can twist the knife so well? “He, well… He’s better at this than me. At the big speeches and the grand gestures. So much better—it’s kind of silly for me to try. But…he deserves to hear it.”

So maybe you should tell HIM, Chat thinks. But Ladybug rambles on before he has the chance to voice those feelings.

“He’s one of my best friends…”

So am I!

“...and the funniest guy I know.”

Now, that’s just cruel.

“But what really made me fall for him is…his heart, I guess.”

Chat used to have a heart—right where the gaping hole in his chest now resides.

“Oh, Chaton.” She leans her head against his back, right overtop of her hand. “He’s just the sweetest guy. A-and he makes me feel safe. And…and brave.”

She takes a deep breath. “Safe enough to tell him that I…” Her voice falls to a whisper. “I really love him.”

Chat drags in another unforgiving breath. “He s-sounds great, Bug. But I should really get go—”

Ladybug grabs his arm, gently twisting him towards her. Her face is closer than he expected it to be, and suddenly, for some reason…

He doesn’t think he wants to run anymore.

“Chat Noir?”

“Y-yeah?” His heart’s going wild. How is he meant to function when Ladybug has that look in her eyes?

She slides a hand up his chest and tugs gently on his bell. “I really, really love you.”

“You… Me?”

“Yeah, silly.” She giggles again, and he drinks in the sound; he can’t get enough of it. “I thought you knew that.”

“H-how was I supposed to know that?”

She rises on her tiptoes, landing a quick peck on the corner of his mouth. The spot burns when she pulls away.

“Did the kissing really not clue you in?” she teases.

“You kept saying it was practice!”

“B-but—because I was flirting with you!” She takes a step backwards, distressed hands brushing through her pigtails. “I thought you knew that!”

Chat can’t believe this—that he might finally get everything he ever wanted.

He also can’t believe his new girlfriend—is it too soon to call her that?—is this bad at communication.

“Ladybug,” he says softly, but he can’t keep the laughter out of his voice—not anymore, when he wants to sing his love from the rooftop. “You showed up to patrol a month ago, sat down, and—without once looking me in the eye—told me you wanted to improve your kissing skills. So you could impress the man you’re in love with.”

“W-well, I did want that!”

He raised his eyebrows. “You told me this after years of talking about loving someone else.”

“I mean, I used to. But then—”

“Yet at no point did you share that very relevant information with me.”

“I told you I’m no good at this!”

Chat laughs, catching her hands before she can hide behind them. “It’s okay, my lady. Now that I know the truth, I’d be more than happy to let you practice that, too.”

He winks, enjoying the way her cheeks flush scarlet. Oh, this is going to be fun.

Cupping her cheek, he tilts her chin up. His confidence wavers slightly when her eyes darken in anticipation—this next kiss will be real. And they’ll both know that.

But he’s a quick study.

“What about our other lessons?” Ladybug breathes, her words hot on his mouth.

“Hmm…I don’t know.” He taps a finger to his chin, grinning as he presses his forehead against hers. “I think we could use some more practice.”

Notes:

This could have easily been PRPR if i tweaked a few lines, but idk. I was feeling pre-reveal Ladynoir!

💜💜💜Thanks for reading! 💜💜💜

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