Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

There were things in this world Dean absolutely hated.

For example, Dean hated to stay in one place for too long - open space and neverending waves were, after all, his ideal surroundings. Unfortunately, those conditions were hard to meet when one had to sit on his ass and do some boring office job.

Dean, however, was quite a clever man, so he already had some plans in motion. It was partly also his company. As his own boss - technically - he should be allowed - probably - to change something for the better. And as he repeatedly told himself, he was not running away. 

The weather was pretty good for late March, though still windy and a bit cold, at least for Portuguese standards. He looked again through the massive window of his office at the incredibly blue water of the Atlantic Ocean, more or less towards his family home in Newport, Rhode Island.

After the tragic death of both their parents, Dean and his younger brother Sammy had been adopted by their uncle Bobby, a self-taught shipwright. His business in Newport was small, but he created incredible sailboats, teaching Sam and Dean everything he had known. Brothers learned quickly and the businessgrew steadily over the years. Soon after college, Sam took over the management and legal stuff, while Dean happily worked with his hands and tested the vessels he built.

Together, they managed to expand the Singer & Winchesters family business of boat-building to the shores of Europe. With the growing company, however, came new responsibilities, and hence the problem arose - Dean was now required to sit on his ass and work behind the desk. Apparently, somebody had to do it, and Sam was absolutely positive that Dean was the best somebody for the task. Dean strongly disagreed. The only part he liked was working on the sailboats' plans, but those kinds of things were quite rare.

As it turned out, working in Porto had its perks, since Europeans absolutely loved their vacation days and Dean was allowed - or allowed himself - to take some time off and sail on his beloved 43 feet 3 inches sloop, the Impala, which he called his precious Baby. It was strongly recommended that the CEO of the company maintain his mental stability and not climb the walls of his office building in a quest to get the hell out, right?

Baby was a real beauty. Her classic design, sheer line of the bow, and black hull were Dean’s real pride. She had plenty of safety adjustments and modern technology, but she had been designed like an old racing boats and ready to cross any ocean with her owner. In fact, she had already done that - she had crossed the Atlantic with Dean, since he absolutely despised flying and, at the same time, 4 years prior he had had to get to Portugal somehow. Dean was extremely proud of what she'd become through the years. She took him where he wanted, never letting him down, even in bad conditions, when it came to it. Obviously, the black boat required proper maintenance, which her owner was happy to provide, asking for help only in emergencies and particularly complex tasks.

Dean was never sure if the girls he was meeting were more interested in him, or in his boat - and he could not bring himself to be mad at this particular detail.

So, every now and then, Dean would take Baby on a little trip, sometimes with a crew, sometimes all by himself. There had been times he had sailed with his friends or family for a week or so, but since Sammy and his wife had decided to multiply and pop out a bunch of kids, family trips were not as often occurring these days. Nevertheless, the Impala was always ready if Sam or Eileen ever wanted a break from the real world and grown-up decisions that Dean had yet to make. He was always eager to sail with the rest of his extended family and friends as well. For the most part of the year, however, Dean stayed in Porto with his brother, to keep the family business running.

Perhaps it was the reason why at the age of 36, he found himself permanently tired of tall buildings and boring meetings, dreaming of open space and the lulling, blue waves.

A few months ago, he had decided he should follow his guts and shape his life to the form he would be happy about. After some weeks of complicated planning, today he was finally ready to share the news with his brother.

Dean was sweating through all the layers of his suit. 

I’m not running, he thought, probably for the 50th time that day. He walked to his desk, looked at the numbers on his computer, and opened his personal planner again. I’m not crazy and Sammy is not going to freak out.

All he had to do was to tell his brother some sad story about his sad feelings and Sam would go for it.

Probably.

The door to his office swung open. First came the amazing, shiny mop of hair, then the whole of little Sammy, who had somehow forgot to stop growing.

“I’ve got the message from Charlie, you wanted to see me?”

Dean stood up from his chair, rounded the desk, and leaned on it with his back. This was important. Somehow, his little speech began to flee from his mind.

“Yeah, so. I’ve been thinking, uh…” he stopped, searching for the right words.

Sam frowned and closed the door to the office. “What’s going on Dean?”

This is going great.

“So, you know how basically all of the business runs by itself by now? I mean, I know I’m technically supervising people at the production facility, but Benny is doing a great job as my assistant, and I worked with him for the past few years so I’m positive he has all the skills." He stopped for air, and just when Sam tried to say something, Dean continued. “So, the point is, I’m quite sure he will manage to keep the production stable even if I’m not technically here, which he did, actually, every time I took some time off, so It’s not going to be a total disaster-” 

“Dean-” 

“I mean, it’s obvious that it’s gonna be inconvenient for the business, and especially for you, and I’m not really happy about, y’know, leaving you all the mess-”

“Dean!-”

“-but at the same time it's not impossible, and I really think it’s not going to damage the company if I’m not, let’s say, here -”

“Dean, for fuck's sake, could you stop for a minute?!” Sam had this concerned slash irritated little brother look on his face now, so Dean shut his mouth. “What are you talking about? You’re babbling.”

Dean looked through his window again and took a deep breath. “Alright. Listen, Sammy,” he started again. “I know we were in this whole thing together, y’know, the family business?” Dean looked at Sam, who nodded. “But all this expansion, although great, has turned me into an ordinary businessman, which I am not, really. This…” He waved his hand around the room, “...is not my place. I’m dying for an open space, man.”

Sam frowned again. This wasn’t the first time the brothers had talked about Dean’s need for a change of scenery from time to time, but Dean had never admitted before that office work was driving him nuts.

“Dean,” Sam started carefully, “when you say this is not your place, what do you mean?”

Dean sighed. “To tell you the truth,” he said evenly, “I’ve been thinking about a longer journey for a while, to stretch my legs and clear my head. I want to take Baby with me and do some good old exploring. I’m thinking about the North, maybe some Baltic Sea experience? Depends on the weather and stuff. I mean, I will be back, eventually. I just really need to clear my mind. I’m going crazy here, Sammy.”

Sam stayed quiet for a moment, lost in his own thoughts. Dean was aware that his brilliant idea born from his desire for blue, blue water, wasn’t pleasant for younger Winchester. Sammy would have to stay here and be responsible for the whole, big company without his sibling by his side. As scary as the prospect was, Sam grew out to be an extremely intelligent adult and Dean had no doubt his brother was ready for steering the company all by himself.

Sam looked at Dean again. “How long are we talking about?”

“At least a few months, I think.” Dean paused, waiting for his brother's reaction, but Sam stayed silent. “I’m absolutely positive the company is stable, at least from the constructing and building point of view. I mean, you’re the one handling all the money and legal stuff anyway, but according to my data and the company results so far, the business will survive in your hands, with no strain actually. You are the smart one here, man. And you can always count on Charlie and Benny, even Andrea. I’m sure they will provide you with plenty of support.”

Sam looked at Dean again. He finally moved from the door to the small, gray sofa and sat down, examining wooden panels on the floor. Dean saw that Sammy hesitated. It looked like he already knew what he wanted to say, but was trying really hard to put it in the right words, so his brother wouldn't freak out.

Finally, Sam's gaze landed on Dean. “You do realize I’m more concerned about you than me? I get that you feel cramped, but this whole idea is more than a little disturbing. It feels like you’re trying to run, and I think you know it too.”

Shit. 

”You were the one who pushed for European expansion, and as it is profitable, I can't help but think that you were just trying to run from the US as well, for some reason, Dean.”

Dean grimaced. It was true he had been eager to move to Porto all those years ago, but at the same time, with the growth of their company, it had been the only logical, next step. Back then, he hadn't taken into account that his precious time with Baby - to sail wherever he wanted - would be cut short. He also hadn’t fully comprehended the concept of him staying outside of the production facility for most of the time. He was always thrilled to work with his hands and build some damn boats if the possibility presented itself, but now he mainly worked at the office, managing other people, of all things. This was certainly not the ‘working his ass off’ that he thought Bobby had warned him about.

He started to formulate some response, but before he managed to open his mouth, Sam continued. “And what about Lisa? I thought you have something good here, with her.”

Lisa had been his most recent girlfriend, just turned ex-girlfriend last week, and this little detail Sammy didn’t yet know. Funny enough, she hadn't crossed Dean’s mind much in his frantic journey planning that he had started months earlier. She was beautiful and smart, and they had gone on a few dates, much to his brother's delight. As there had been a spark though, the flame had been definitely missing, at least for Dean. Of course, all Sam ever wanted was for his forever bachelor of a brother to settle down, especially after Sammy himself had found his love and joy with Eileen. For Dean, however, there seemed to be no princess charming in sight.

“Yeah, it didn’t work out. It was not meant to be, I guess?”

Sam nodded. He looked almost remorseful. “I am sorry to hear this, Dean.” His lips formed a thin line and he glanced through the window. “I’m really not sure what you expect me to say. I know the company will survive without you here, at least for some time.” He looked at Dean again. ”And I am gonna miss you, as well as Eileen and the kids will, but I’m not going to stop you. However, as your loving brother, I’d like to inform you that running your whole life is not a good coping mechanism. It is not impossible that before you find what you’re looking for, you’re going to run out of places to... well, run to.”

“Are you pleased with yourself right now with this wordplay?” asked Dean, taking the opportunity to lighten the mood a little.

“I am, actually,” Sam grinned.

The tension began to dissipate. As Dean congratulated himself inside of his head for his little speech, Sam continued.

“When do you plan to sail out? We should probably double-check the Impala before. I know you keep her in good shape, but there is no harm in being thorough.”

“I’m actually planning to talk with Benny to help me with that. I hope we will have some time for her maintenance at the beginning of April. If it is really okay with you, I wanna go as soon as we finish with Baby.” Dean hesitated. “Are you really sure Sammy?” Then he added smugly, “will you survive without your beacon of wisdom?”

Sam chuckled, then shook his head. “Eileen is staying, so I think we’re safe.”

Dean couldn’t argue with him at that. Sammy’s wife was fiercely smart, beautiful, funny, and, overall, so perfect that it was a real mystery why she hung out with Sam in the first place. He couldn’t compete in wisdom with her or, really, anything, even if he tried.

“Okay, smartass. I’ll take this as a yes. Remember, I can always come back running to you if the company is on fire or something. I’ll even go back by plane.” 

“Yeah, and leave Baby in some Polish city which name you can’t pronounce?”

“I heard they have some mean pierogies over there, so don’t underestimate the country only because of its crazy consonants.”

They bickered for a few more minutes, and then they tried to plan the next few days until Charlie called looking for Sam for important business stuff.

When the brothers stood by the door, they did their traditional manly hug that indicated they were still a family, all was fine and nobody had died yet.

Once the door finally shut after Sammy, Dean sighed again.

He was in the clear. All he had to do now was inform Bobby, Charlie, and Benny - in this particular order - that he was going to take Baby for some good old exploration. Bobby, as Dean assumed, wouldn’t mind much, since the boys were already far away from him. The old man did fly to Porto a few times a year to spend holidays together and check on the brothers and the business. They also called him regularly, so Dean’s expedition wouldn’t collide much with their normal schedule. 

Dean did, however, fear The Big Talk with Charlie.

They had met in college and by now, they were thick as thieves. The redheaded friend had followed the Winchesters through the Atlantic and had settled down in Europe. She had started working with them 10 years ago and Dean couldn’t imagine the company without her. He valued her opinion and spent every other weekend with her, playing games and watching movies. They had a lot in common - for example, they shared a passion for beautiful women. 

Yeah, that talk is gonna go just great.

If Dean was honest with himself, leaving Charlie behind would hurt like a bitch. In fact, the thought of leaving all of his friends and family stung an awful lot. At the same time, he knew he needed to take this step, even if sailing solo was not always sunshine and rainbows. He felt an unsatisfied hunger burning inside of him, which indicated he was not where he was supposed to be, and he was eager to finally change that.

+

As it turned out, Charlie really was the worst of them all. There were screams, hugs, and tears, and at the end of the day, Dean had to promise her to call, write and Facetime her from every possible city he would visit. She also requested some trinkets from every nice place he was in. He had been planning to buy her those, anyway.

+

The thick smell of laminate and cut wood welcomed Dean when he entered the hangar at the production site a few days later. He soon spotted three hulls of their new model of 50-foot sloop, every single one at the different stages of making. It wasn’t his favorite design, but he knew the market demanded these types of vessels, especially on the Mediterranean Sea. He scanned the place looking for a characteristic, black hat.

Dean had first met Benny almost 5 years ago at the Nauticampo, the international fair for boating stuff held in Lisbon every year. Sammy and he had been looking for the right spots for their production facility and had wanted to find some local craftsmen since Europe hadn't been their area of expertise. Benny and his wife Andrea had been one of the exhibitors - she was specializing in sailmaking, and he was a yacht rigger - a match made in heaven. As it'd turned out, Andrea was Greek and she had been sailing since childhood. She and Benny had met at the yacht he had chartered to sail around Sicily. Both of them could have provided important knowledge about the European customs and demands of a good sailing vessel.

Dean and Benny had bonded quickly over their shared passion of building cool stuff and after a few weeks, they all had decided to join forces and work together. Since Benny and Andrea had already lived in Porto, they had recommended looking at the city’s potential. Soon after, the brothers had found the right place for their facility by the Douro River. 

When the time had come for Dean to permanently move to Porto (he had been super fed up with living in hotels or at Sam’s and Eileen’s house), Benny had offered his help in safe passage through the Atlantic. They had worked really well together as a crew and the exhausting journey had helped them form a stable friendship.

“Hello, brother.”

Dean turned around. In the cloud of white dust, he spotted a big figure. “Hi, Benny!” He took a few steps towards the hull Benny had been grinding a moment ago and shook his friend’s hand. “Baby’s here, she’s berthed to the quay.” Dean shook the keys to the sailboat. 

“So you weren’t jokin’ around, huh? I thought you’re screwing with me,” Benny drawled.

Dean chuckled. At this point, a few other employees noticed him and waved in his direction. The loud buzzing of grinders filled the space.

“No joking man, not this time. I ah… I think I need this, my head is not straight.”

Benny grinned, then nodded. ”I get it. So, what’s the plan, cher? Where will you go?”

“I did some research. I am planning to go North for now and see how it goes. I might even see Denmark, I can probably send you a postcard.”

“I wouldn’t mind if you do.”

Dean chuckled again, then sighed and looked Benny straight in the eyes. “Listen, Benny… Will you keep an eye on Sammy? The kid is stubborn and if something happens, he won't tell me. If you see something's not right, give me the heads up, okay?”

Benny nodded. “Will do, Dean. I’ve got your back. Now, Deanmark is long way from home, brother. We need to get Baby nice and goin’.” He looked in the open space through the massive hangar door, where the Impala was docked, her mast visible. “So I assume you will help me, you lazy dog, this is your goddamn boat after all.”

“Yeah, yeah, don’t sweat it. I just need to change. Meet me at the deck in five.”

+

Two weeks later, the Impala stood steadily in the spring, morning sun at the Marina da Afurada in Porto. She was ready, and so was Dean. The sky was clear, and the forecast, at least for the next few days, was promising.

In the end, Dean and Benny had done some minor upgrades. The yacht had needed an additional drogue, a trysail, and a storm jib, which Dean had ordered a few weeks ago. They had checked all of the sails and lines, just in case. They had also inspected the standing rigging - Benny’s specialty - and the engine, which was Dean's responsibility. His biological dad had been a mechanic, and before his premature demise, John had shown Dean the ropes. It was one of the few positive memories with his father that Dean actually cherished.

Baby had some badass electronics despite her age. She had standard bow thrusters, an autopilot, and an anemometer. A few months ago, Dean had installed a brand-new marine VHF radio under the deck because the old one had started making creaky noises. He also had a portable one, as sailing alone sometimes required him to stay on deck and communicate with other vessels simultaneously. As the most tech-savvy among them, Charlie had helped with the GPS chartplotter, which was essentially a touch-screen, waterproof computer with up-to-date nautical charts that stayed in the cockpit all the time. Dean also had an Automatic Identification System, which allowed him to see other vessels' names and important data on his chartplotter. AIS happened to enable his family and friends to track the Impala's location on a special website, and he had a strong suspicion that Sam would abuse this knowledge somehow.

Dean had also done some standard checking of his safe equipment. The Impala had a satellite phone, through which one could call for help from almost every place on Earth. It was expensive, but Dean could call anybody, even from the middle of the ocean. If all went to shit, Dean had some rockets, flares, EPIRB, radar-SART, and a life raft, which he knew how to operate, but didn’t ever want to use this knowledge.

He took the last of the boxes containing food and his duffel bag from Sam’s pick-up truck, steadying himself on the quay. Sam followed him with an additional toolbox and fuel. For safety reasons, it was smart to have both, even though Dean would obviously refuel along the way. They hauled themselves over the port side using Baby’s shroud and went directly below deck. Sam, who had to bow his head now, placed the toolbox and the fuel on the table in the middle of the cabin. Dean gave him a dirty look and quickly moved the items, putting them in the lockers under the seats instead. He inspected the table for any stains and scratches, then looked around, giving the boat a final check before departure. The Impala was polished inside and out, everything in order - just as Dean liked. He had unpacked his ‘bad weather’ gear earlier, hanging his waterproof jacket and trousers within reach.

Sam sat on the couch. “Do you have paper charts too, Dean?”

“Yeah, all the way to Sweden, just in case.”

In Dean’s opinion, taking the nautical paper charts was a necessity - there was always a possibility the chartplotter would fail, and it was only common sense to have an alternative way to navigate in such conditions.

He moved to his navigation station and turned on the electronics, starting with the VHF radio, that he left on channel 16 to monitor any important messages while underway. Then, he switched on the regular radio, plugged his phone into it, and searched for his favorite Led Zeppelin playlist. He could now hear the first notes of ‘Whole Lotta Love’ from the outside cockpit speakers.

“Remember to call us when you can.” Sam hesitated. “I know you know this, but… please, be careful out there. Do not strain yourself. Take your time, there is no rush. Safety first.”

“Yeah, I know. Nothing crazy. You watch your back too, you hear me? And give me a call if something happens.”

“I hear you.”

Sam nodded, then stood up, following Dean onto the deck. They went into the cockpit. Dean zipped up his fleece jacket and put the life jacket on. Sam tapped the compass glass and observed Dean as he started the engine. The Impala roared to life. 

“Alright. Call me when you berth."

“Okay, Sammy.”

They hugged. Dean patted his brother under his shoulder blades. Sam sniffled. 

“Stop it, bitch,” Dean said, even though his own damn eyes felt a bit stingy.

Sam sniffled again, then chuckled softly. “Yeah, okay.” He took a step back, and Dean discovered his brother's eyes were suspiciously glassy. Sam nodded once, then turned around and stepped off the boat onto the quay, before turning back to help with the casting off. Dean gave him a thumbs-up, so Sam dropped the lines, tossing them onto the deck. The only rope left was a stern spring line put on the loop. Dean put the shifter in reverse. The boat moved tight against the dock, and the bow moved out from the quay. The Impala pointed in the direction of the ocean. Dean took a deep breath. He dropped the stern spring and thought, let’s go, girl, just you and me, as he put the shifter slow ahead.

“Jerk!” he heard from behind him. Dean smiled. 

Chapter Text

Dean opened Impala’s logbook and reached for a pen.

Date: April 20, 2018

Time: 1500

Course: 345ᐤ

Log: 43 M

Wind: 4 to 5, south-southwest (SSW)

Speed: 7 knots

Sails: Mainsail, Genoa

Engine: -

He looked at the GPS and wrote down coordinates under Latitude and Longitude. He technically didn’t have to keep a logbook, but it was helpful to know how much time the engine had been running, how much fuel was left, and what distance he had made so far. The ‘Log’ represented the nautical miles, the unit of length used by sailors, and for Baby, it should be higher, but the new chartplotter he had installed not long ago had reset the count.

He checked the battery's level. The two batteries on the Impala were charging only when the boat was connected to the electricity on the dock, or while the engine was running, so if the power dropped low, he would have to turn the engine on. For now, though, it was okay to leave it as it was.

Dean went back to the cockpit and looked around, checking his surroundings and the autopilot he had turned on half an hour ago. The weather was perfect, he had had a steady wind since morning. The Impala sailed broad-reach for a few hours now, going smoothly through the waves. He knew that it was quite safe for now to leave Baby by herself - he was not currently sailing through any main cargo roads and the nautical chart showed no obstacles for the next hour or so, but he wanted to be sure he was not going to make some stupid mistake, especially on the first day of the trip. He glanced at the chartplotter - the area looked secluded apart from one sailboat going in the other direction. It was too far away for Dean to see any people aboard.

He went below the deck to use the head - obviously, the toilet had its own name, sailors loved to name everything differently - and decided to start some dinner. Dean was a great cook, and he often used this skill as a way to sneak into people’s hearts. When he traveled with crew members, they usually appreciated his meals on board. Ideally, the meals should be easy on the stomach - eating on the sea was extremely tricky since more often than not people got seasickness. Dean was one of the lucky birds that didn’t have this problem despite the weather, which was truly a blessing.

He decided to eat some spaghetti. He had prepared some sauces in the jars at home, which he could quickly warm up without the need to stay below the deck for very long. Cooking on a boat meant the whole vessel was moving quite uncontrollably with the waves, so Dean steadied himself on a sink and lockers, trying to stay vertical. He worked quickly and efficiently, filling the pots and heating the contents on the burner hobs. A few minutes later, he had a divine-smelling, steaming bowl of pasta in his hands, which he took to the cockpit with him.

His mom had used to make spaghetti, he thought while he sat down and dug in. She’d been no cook, but this particular dish she’d been quite good at. Dean remembered her rather in the living room, working long hours, sitting at the table with her notes and books than in the kitchen, preparing family meals. Mary used to work at the university, specializing in mythology and religion. His dad never understood her need to make a name for herself. They were fighting a lot, especially in the last few years of their lives. The constant shouting and crying - the noise of family breaking apart - was haunting Dean to this day. He was not sure how his parents managed to stay together for so many years, as they should never have been a couple at all.

In one of those last years of their life together, Mary had ridden with Sam and Dean to Bobby’s. She and John had a huge fight the night prior, and their mom was on the edge of her patience. Bobby took them to the beach. Dean was ten at the time, and it was the very first time he saw a sailing boat up close. The sails were shining in the sun, the sea was peaceful, and the only noise came from the calm waves.

How nice it would be to be free from all the problems and shouting, he’d thought.

Bobby must have seen the gleam in his eyes, because after that, he took Dean on his 33-foot yawl, Karen, named after his late wife. Sailing was amazing - surrounded by the blue of the ocean, Dean felt light and carefree, leaving all the problems behind.

After that, Dean spent every summer in Newport, sailing on different boats with other local kids, until he started building his own vessels under Bobby’s watchful eye.

He had been chasing this feeling of calmness his whole life, as Sammy rightly suspected. Sailing was Dean’s way of dealing with reality. It made him feel peaceful. Even today, after just a few hours on Baby, he felt lighter and thought more clearly than he had in the last few weeks.

Dean finished his meal and moved to the sink again, putting the bowl inside. He reemerged in the cockpit and turned off the autopilot, taking the steering wheel in his hands. Impala was a really fast girl, with her big sails and slender hull. 

He glanced at the chartplotter again. He would have to change the course soon, it was almost time for a jibe.

+

The sun touched the waterline, and the sky went all pink and violet. As he'd rightfully suspected, the sunset looked stunning. Dean took out his phone and took some photos to send to Sam and Charlie later. It had started to get cold, so he put on his warmer jacket. He had also made himself a tea some time ago and had been sipping from it from time to time. Staying warm and dry was crucial during sailing, and he planned to do just that.

He wanted to sail for about twelve hours his first day, as a way of warm-up. He needed some, he thought, at least before entering the Bay of Biscay. Earlier he had found a marina in Ribeira and had planned to stay there for the night. It had been the nearest harbor he had found to the route he’d chosen for his journey, and he was determined to sail as far as possible on his first day.

He spotted ship traffic on the chartplotter, so he needed to stay focused for at least a few more hours. If he were honest with himself, he started to get a bit tired and sore. 

“Impala, Impala, Impala, this is Big Ben II, over,” the voice from a radio suddenly called. Dean brought the portable VHF he had on him to his mouth and pressed the button to talk.

“Big Ben II, Big Ben II, this is Impala, over,” he replied. He released the button and waited for the response. He knew the boat’s name and was almost positive he recognized the voice.

“Please switch to channel 72, over.”

“Switching to channel 72, over.”

Dean switched the channels and pushed the button again. “Big Ben II, Big Ben II, this is Impala, over.”

“Dean Winchester! Long time no see. Where are you headed, mate?”

“Hi, Mick! What are the odds, right?” Dean chuckled. Mick was one of their former clients. They were not really friends, more of acquaintances, but the familiar voice from the radio cheered Dean a little, taking his thoughts away from tiredness. “I’m actually sailing away from Porto for a bit. I intend to berth in Ribeira. What about you?”

“I’ve assembled some of my friends and we’re going for a little vacation. We’re headed to Pontevedra for tonight.”

“I see. How is the weather and traffic up north?” Asked Dean.

“I’d say quite pleasant, at least for now. I hear, however, that there is some hardship ahead. Strong west wind, possible storm. Be careful, Dean! Over.”

“Yeah, thanks, Mick. Out.”

Dean put the radio away. He had checked the weather forecast a few times, last time this very morning and there had been not a word about any storm, though he'd known about the predictable change of the wind direction. Sailing through the storm alone was possible, but not advised, and definitely not smart. Sammy would probably kill him. At the same time, Dean didn’t want to be stuck at the harbor in Ribeira for days, if the storm and strong wind would last longer than a few hours. Maybe he should consider pushing forward?

He looked around again. Directly on his route were no visible vessels. He checked the chartplotter - it looked like he was fine to leave Baby on autopilot for at least 10 minutes. He switched it on and went to his navigation station. He was due to turn on the navigation lights anyway, so he did that by pushing the buttons on the control board over his seat. He looked at the latest weather info he received and scanned the paper charts. There were no good places to berth that stayed on his intended route. 

He took out his phone. A while ago, he had connected the chartplotter to it and now could search the coastline more thoroughly. After a few minutes of tapping the screen, he saw some marina up north in Muxía. He would have to sail for a few more hours, but he could probably make it before the storm hit. 

I have to reef the sails before the wind increases. And it’s time to charge the batteries. 

He made a new waypoint on the chartplotter so he could clearly see it in the cockpit. He put his phone away and went back to the steering wheel, thrown off balance a few times. He had to turn the boat into the wind and take care of the sails. The first step was to turn the engine on, so Dean did just that. Then, he turned around and prepared the lines. To move safely through the deck, especially when the ocean was lumpy, he had to fasten himself to the jackstay. He knew that if he went overboard, it would be game over for him. He was alone and nobody would even know, at least for a while, that he was no longer on the Impala. The chances of him swimming back to the sailing boat were slim to none.

When he had the reefing lines ready, he put the gear forward and turned the Impala into the wind. The sails began to flap. Dean steadied the steering wheel and turned the autopilot on again. He quickly moved to the ropes and pulled. When he was satisfied with the size of the mainsail, he switched to the furling line of the headsail and started to pull it, releasing the jib sheet. When he was satisfied with the sails, he turned back to the steering wheel and moved Baby back on her route. 

+

The wind increased soon after. Dean switched the engine off and stayed in the cockpit. For now, it was quite peaceful, except for the noises of the wind and the hull hitting waves every now and then. He could clearly see the white moon in the night sky, although over the horizon on his left some dark, scary clouds began to form. 

The storm is coming quicker than I thought. 

As he sailed further, he moved away from the traffic and was almost completely alone again, as the chartplotter indicated. On his right, not so far away he could see the lights on the coastline. Ahead of him, the white light of the Faro de Muxía lighthouse was visible every few seconds. His watch showed him it was almost 1 AM.

The silence was broken by the sound of his ringtone. Startled, he realized he’d forgotten the phone in his pocket. He pulled it out and glanced at the screen.

Aw shit.

He swiped the screen and picked up the call. “Hiya Sammy. Did you miss me already?”

“Dean! What the hell? The storm is coming from the west! Why are you still sailing north?”

So yeah, Sam was spying on him - obviously - through the boat's AIS. Dean had feared that his brother would try to micromanage him from home and to nobody’s surprise, Sam did exactly that.

“Sam, don’t you have some beauty sleep to catch? Relax, I’m almost at the harbor. I ran into Mick Davies a while ago and he told me about the storm. I wanted to push a bit further, but I’m not sure how long the bad weather will last. I’ll be in Muxía in a bit.”

“You sound like shit, man. Are you sure you will be ok?”

“Sammy, dammit, you can see me on the map. I would have to have a stroke to miss the fucking marina.” 

This kid, what a pain in the ass.

“OK, but call me when you’re there”

“Kay, as you wish, princess. Out.”

He turned the boat a bit to keep the lighthouse on starboard. The moon was huge and almost shiny, the stars barely visible. It was a bright night. Soon, he would have to turn the engine on. He suddenly remembered he should inform the harbormaster of his arrival. He took the radio up to his mouth again and pushed the button.

“Muxia Marina, Muxia Marina, Muxia Marina, this is Impala, over.”

He waited a moment. It was normal for the harbormaster to take their time in answering. Finally, the heavy accented voice came through.

“Impala, Impala, this is Muxia Marina, please switch to channel 9, over.”

Dean switched the channels and called out the marina again. When they answered, he started to explain his intentions and provided all the vessel information they requested. 

“Impala, you have permission to berth. We’re waiting for you at the marina, over.”

“I understand, I’m coming then. Out.”

It took him about 30 minutes more to pass to the other side of the lighthouse. Soon after, he turned the engine on and dropped the sails. He prepared the fenders and lines. The dark clouds were now almost above him. When he saw the quay, the heavy drops of rain started to pat on the deck. He used the midship spring line to berth without needing the help of anybody else. He brought the stern to the dock and when the boat was close to the quay, Dean put the line on the nearest cleat he saw. He moved quickly to the steering wheel and put the shifter slow ahead. The Impala started to turn steadily. When the boat glued itself to the quay, Dean did the quick work of tying the cleat knots on stern and bow lines. Finally, he turned the engine off.

The berthing was one of the most stressful activities for any sailor, no matter the experience one had under his belt. Fortunately, it was the middle of the night, so there was nobody around to judge his skills.

He was physically exhausted, but he had a deep feeling of accomplishment inside of him. He took his phone out and texted Sam:

“I’m at the marina. It’s too late to call you. I’m alive and going to hit the hay.“

A few seconds later came the response: 

“Okay, but we will talk tomorrow, Dean. I mean it.”

Dean groaned. Why had he been so sad to leave his snippy brother again?

He stood up. He had to do a quick work of clearing the deck. Then, he needed to pay the fee to the harbormaster and buy some access to the electricity and water supply. He switched the navigation lights off and got to work.

+

In the end, he secured the boat by adding more lines, stabilizing her on the quay - the storm wind was no joke. Then, Dean took care of the fees, locked the boat from the inside, stripped to his underwear, and put his phone in charge. He made his bed, which was quite spacious and cozy. He decided to sleep on his usual spot, on the stern on the port side, near the navigation station. When he finally lay down, Dean was almost instantly asleep, despite the wind hurling outside.

+

He woke up the next morning to the rain steadily hitting the deck. Dean sat up and stretched out. It was time to check the weather forecast and take a shower. It was late enough to call Sam, but first Dean wanted to update the logbook - he had been too exhausted to do it when he arrived 8 hours prior. 

He sat at the navigation station and added the numbers. He was underway for almost 17 hours and sailed 127 nautical miles. 

About two thousand and two hundred more to go, if I want to see Copenhagen. 

Depending on the wind, he would need about 30 more days to get to Denmark, give or take. It was promising, however he knew that keeping the speed above 7 knots all the time was not possible - he'd been extremely lucky with the weather the day before. 

He stood up and prepared himself a coffee. When it was ready, he sat down on the couch with the mug and let his mind wander, sipping the hot beverage from time to time. Why did he rush, exactly? The whole point of this journey was to rest, nobody expected him to be back for at least a few more months. Maybe he should do some good old sightseeing? 

Let’s take one day at a time, he thought. He took his phone out. It was time to call Sam and hear his bitching about Dean’s behavior. What else was new?

+

During the day, he visited every interesting place in Muxía and decided to stay for another night in the harbor. Resuming the journey at dawn sounded smart, at least according to the weather forecast.

By morning he was well rested and ready for more sailing. The storm had passed, and the sky was gray and moody. The wind had changed again, this time to south-west, so still promising, taking into account his plans. It was, however, blowing pretty strong, so he prepared beforehand and reefed in the marina both of his sails. He took off at 6 AM, the waypoint set at Gijon in Spain.

+

“Hello?”

“Charlie! I’m in San Sebastian. You’d love it here. It’s like this secret, Celtic village with ocean and mountains.”

“Oh, Dean! It’s you! Wait, give me a sec.” He heard some shuffling and closing doors. “Okay, now I can talk. Tell me everything, bestie!”

“Wait, why did you have to move to talk to me? Where are you?” Dean asked.

”I’m on a date, but this is not important. Right now I’d like to hear how you are holding up on this super solo journey of yours. Did you find yourself, changed religion, anything spectacular?”

“How is your date not important, Charlie, c’mon,” Dean grinned. Charlie was the best, he loved her so much. His chest hurt a little. “What’s her name?”

“It’s Dorothy. She’s so cool, you’d like her. She came here on a motorbike!” Charlie squealed. “But enough about me. How are you?”

“I’m fine, Charles. It’s um… It’s refreshing. And challenging. The views are to die for. And the Impala is doing great. I’m trying to find you some cool gifts and I hit the jackpot with this town.” He hesitated. Charlie was probably the only other person he could talk to and be honest with. “And uh… I am a bit lonely. Don’t get me wrong, I think solitude is something that I actually needed. I just have some hard time right now, you know?”

“I hear you. I’m sorry you feel this way. Do you want to talk about it?”

Did he want to talk about it? He wasn’t sure he could form a whole sentence about what was going on inside of his head. 

“I will, eventually. And I’ll let you know, I promise. Now, skedaddle to your date girl. She waited long enough.”

“Okay, but if you need anything, and I mean anything - you know where to find me.”

“Thanks, Charles. I love you.”

“I know.”

+

A few days later Dean berthed in Castle Marina in Brest. He needed some time to prepare for sailing through the English Channel - not only because of the fast currents and tidal range but also the huge traffic in this area. Catching the tides and currents was tricky, so Dean had to actually sit down and calculate the route, taking everything into account, including the weather. After his journey through the canal, he wanted to reach Plymouth and leave the Impala for a day or two to explore some of the coastal, English villages.

He stripped from his waterproof clothes and hung them on a hook in his cabin. It was raining all day and while he managed to stay dry, he started to feel cold towards the end - a clear sign he should wear more layers next time. He changed into his nice jeans and a flannel shirt, deciding to hit the town for a night. Maybe he’d get lucky. At the very least, it should help him shake the strange feeling of loneliness he seemed to be stuck with for some reason.

Since it was possible he’d be back with some company, Dean tidied Baby up a bit, then closed her up and turned to the general direction of the town. He pulled out his phone and quickly searched for recommended local bars. As it turned out, the nearest one - called ‘Cocorico’ - was one of the most popular in the area. He looked around until he found the colorful sign, then started walking. Once he reached the door, he opened it and went inside. 

The place was swarming with people. It was decorated mostly in blue and red, and the interior looked shiny and fresh. Near the wall stood an old blue car, and Dean had to admit - it looked pretty cool. He moved further into the space and sat on a free stool at the bar. After ordering a local beer, he looked around.

Beside him stood a group of young adults speaking French, which was completely incomprehensible to him. Dean took a sip of his newly arrived beer and decided to order a meal, too. He pulled out his phone and sent his standard messages to Sam, Charlie, Benny, and Bobby, updating them on his whereabouts and overall condition. Then, he opened his social apps and tried to catch up on updates while waiting for his burger.

The incredible smell of grilled meat soon caught his attention. When the dish arrived, he ate it, humming happily, and sipped his beer in between bites.

“You’re definitely not from here, am I right?”

He turned his head to the source of the sound. To his left stood a pretty blonde woman in tight jeans and high heels. She had a British accent. He swallowed the last bite of his burger and wiped his hands with a tissue before giving her his best flirtatious smile.

"How did you know?"

She responded with a long, knowing look. "I could just tell." She was checking him out quite openly.

Jackpot.

"I have a feeling you’re not local either," he said.

"That would be correct. I’m Bela."

"And I’m Dean." He shook her hand and grinned wider.

+

Dean opened his eyes to the rays of sun shining on his face through Baby’s window. He could feel a warm body next to him. Their clothes were scattered around the cabin.

One-night stands were nothing new for Dean, but the feeling he experienced after certainly was. To his surprise, not only did the loneliness remain - it spread, leaving his chest feeling strangely hollow.

What’s going on with me?

Dean didn't have time to dwell on it, as Bela began to stir. She slowly opened her eyes, blinking a few times before looking around in mild confusion. After a moment, recognition bloomed on her face, and she turned her head toward Dean.

"Hello, you," she said, smiling at him.

"Hi there. Did you sleep well?" Dean asked, schooling his features into a pleasant smile.

"I actually did. Do you happen to have some coffee?"

+

They parted ways soon after breakfast. Bela had suggested dinner, but Dean politely declined. He needed to focus on the task at hand - navigating through the English Channel. He pulled out his navigational equipment and a chart, but the numbers blurred before his eyes. Within minutes, he had a headache.

What the hell was that? Sex was supposed to be an easy distraction, not the cause of more problems, dammit. It should leave some nice feelings, not make him feel gloomy and depressed.

It’s weird. Isn’t it weird?

He was a man in his prime, so it was, indeed, weird. He decided to call Charlie for advice. He took his phone out and searched for his friend’s name on a list. He pushed the button, waiting for the answer.

“Hi, Dean!”

“Hi Charles, you got a minute?” 

“Yeah, what’s up?”

“So um. Remember when you told me to call you if I wanted to talk?” He started to get nervous. He was bad at feelings. All of them.

“I do. What is going on, my dude? You can tell me anything.” She started to sound concerned.

“Okay. So, I just had a one-night stand with some chick. It was going fine, she was great and all. But um. After I woke up today, I felt like shit. Like something was missing, y'know? She seemed really smart, and she was beautiful, so I’m not really sure what is happening.” Dean paused. It was a bit embarrassing, but he and Charlie were way past that. 

“I hear you,” she said. “So, she was pretty and all and you were into her?” Dean grunted in confirmation. Charlie hummed through the speaker. “Ok, so… My next best guess would be that you are not satisfied with this kind of connection. Maybe you need something different? Maybe it’s time for you to go long-term. I mean, I know that dating Lisa didn’t end well, but she’s not the only person out there…”

Dean furrowed his brows. Was it possible he was simply tired of meaningless sex? 

“That’s… well. That’s unfortunate, I guess.”

Charlie snorted. “Is that all you’ve got? Unfortunate? You’re a disaster, Winchester. It’s not so bad to feel some connection with another person, you know.”

“Yeah, shut up. I’ll think about it. But um. I need some time, I guess? Thank you for this, anyway.”

“Sure, dude. Anytime.”

They chatted a little more about Porto, Sam, and some home-related stuff. After a few minutes, they said their goodbyes. Dean disconnected, put the phone down, and frowned.

Okay, so maybe a good old roll in the hay was not an option for the time being, especially if it left him in such a weird state.

This journey would turn him into a monk. 

Sonofabitch. 

+

Dean continued his sailing and successfully berthed in Plymouth. As planned, he rented a car and left Baby for the day to visit Land's End, since there were no harbors nearby. For some reason, he was particularly curious about the place’s funny name.

He looked at the lighthouse before him, hands in his pockets. The wind was blowing through his hair, tossing it in every direction. The ocean was colored in deep blue.

The Land’s End. The end of the world.

With the vastness of the water before him, Dean suddenly felt small and insignificant. 

He was never a believer. His family wasn’t religious, despite his mom’s field of expertise, but he felt a strong urge to talk to some deity. Mary used to say that angels were watching over him. He wanted to believe that was true, and if there was indeed some angel watching over him, he would love to speak with them. Maybe he would find out why there was a fucking hole in his chest and what he should do to fill it.

Something was definitely missing in his life, and running didn’t seem to help anymore. Maybe he was never supposed to come to Porto, but how would he know? What would life have been like if he had chosen a different path? In another universe, maybe he would have settled down by now, started a family of his own, and mowed a lawn every Saturday. Was that something he really wanted? He couldn’t tell.

As far as Dean knew, he had never really been in love - he’d had plenty of flings over the years, and he had been pretty close to falling in love with one girl back in the US, but it hadn’t worked out in the end. Was he even capable of loving someone like that? He once heard that it was crucial to love yourself before you could love somebody else, but Dean didn’t even like himself very much. He was just some guy who happened to know a thing or two about boats and engines.

He sighed. There was no point in torturing himself with questions he had no answers to. He turned around and started walking back to the car.

+

In the following days, Dean continued his sail. He stopped more often, especially when he saw something beautiful or wanted to visit an interesting place. He ate good food and drank European beer. He listened to good music, watched his favorite movies, and rewatched 'Dr. Sexy, M.D.' reruns. It was probably the first time in his life that he seriously thought about his own needs and tried to understand himself. In The Hague, he found a bookstore and bought a few books that caught his interest - he decided he really liked the ones written by Vonnegut.

These days, he thought about his mom a lot - what kind of woman she had been, and what she had left behind. He found her old studies online and read some of her papers.

Above all, he enjoyed his time on the sea, listening to the wind and waves.

The hole in his chest remained as it was.

On the 25th of May, Dean stood in front of the statue of The Little Mermaid in Copenhagen. His mom had done some studies about sea creatures, as he discovered recently, so he had expanded his knowledge about sirens a bit before arriving at the city. It was fascinating, really, that the half-fish people were present in so many cultures and stories. If you asked Dean, however, he was quite sure folks mistook poor seals or dolphins for hot ladies with scales.

Sam and Bobby wanted to know if Dean was ready to head back. Dean would like to know if he was ready, too. In the end, he told them that he needed more time.

+

A few days later, Dean took off from Sandvig at the Danish island Bornholm. The wind was blowing from the north. He went close-hauled for almost 26 hours until he reached the shore of Gotland Island. At least he thought he did, because he couldn’t see a damn thing in the fucking mist - it was so thick he couldn’t even see his own bow. He was tired; he'd slept only for about 8 hours combined and now had to make sure that he and the Impala wouldn’t end up on some rock or in a fishing net.

Like a mermaid, he thought.

The wind started to die away suddenly, and the Impala slowed to 1,5 knots. It was miserable, so he turned on the engine and dropped the sails. There were no waves at all, the water was almost completely still. He continued like this for an hour or so, and eventually his eyes began to close involuntarily. Suddenly, on the verge of visibility, in the corner of his eye, he could swear he saw a gray tail in the dark.

What the hell?

He scanned the area. There was only mist all around him. The noise of splashed water could be heard from the other side of the hull.

Maybe it’s a seal.

Or a mermaid.

Dean shook his head. He was being ridiculous.

I’m going insane. Great. That’s what I was missing right now. Insanity. 

He shivered. The mist was creeping under his jacket and a wool hat. His hands began to feel cold and stiff. It was undoubtedly the worst night of the journey so far. He took the last sip of the coffee he made earlier and shrugged in distaste - it was lukewarm by now. He looked at the time - 4:20 in the morning. 

Finally, with the first rays of the sun, the mist started to rise. There was still no wind at all, but Dean could finally see the island to his right. Charlie would've loved the vibe, it was super mysterious.

The mist cleared almost entirely by 6 AM. Exhausted, Dean turned on the autopilot and went under the deck to make some new coffee. He had to survive the next few hours somehow. He turned on the radio and stood there for a moment, thinking. Then, he plugged his phone in and chose one of his playlists. From the speakers in the cockpit, Taylor Swift started singing 'Shake it off'. Who was gonna judge him here? Dean was too tired to give a shit, anyway.

He sang with her. Loudly.

At last, at noon on the 7th of June, Dean reached the city of Visby in Gotland.

Chapter Text

Dean scanned the quay, looking for the perfect spot to dock Baby. The harbor was quite small, but luckily not crowded at the moment - plenty of space to choose from. He had put the fenders and lines out some time ago, so he could concentrate fully on the task at hand. His exhaustion didn’t help in the slightest. He looked to his left. 

I could berth port side over there, Baby should fit just fine. 

He spotted some movement on the deck. At the end of it, Dean saw a man who started walking toward him. He had a worn-out yellow sweater on.

Oh, good, he wants to help. 

Dean took his fore spring and prepared to hand it to the guy. He maneuvered cautiously until Baby was close to the quay, then tossed the line to the man, who caught it and looked up at Dean. His eyes were the purest shade of the ocean blue. Dean was instantly mesmerized.

Damn.

His mouth opened involuntarily. He couldn’t tear his eyes away.

The guy was staring right back at him.

Seconds passed.

The Impala started to slowly drift away. Dean suddenly remembered he was still in the middle of berthing. He shook himself from whatever his current state was and asked the guy to put the line on the nearest cleat. The stranger nodded and did what Dean told him to, then took three steps back.

Get a grip, dude, focus, Dean scolded himself. 

He was extremely tired, but Baby needed his undivided attention right now and he couldn’t let her down.

He put the shifter slow ahead, steering the rudder away from the dock. Soon after, the fore spring line became taut and Baby’s fenders gently touched the wooden planks of the quay. Dean took care of the stern line, quickly tying the knot. Then, he moved to the bow and tied a cleat knot there too.

He walked back to the cockpit and turned the engine off. He sighed, muscles slowly relaxing. He made it.

Dean’s successful maneuver caused the usual crowd of observers - mostly sailors from other boats - to dissipate and disappear below their decks. He glanced at the quay. There was no sign of the stranger with ocean-blue eyes from before.

Shame, thought Dean. In the short period of time he'd had, he'd observed not only the color of the stranger’s eyes but also the scruffy beard and messiness of his dark hair. 

Damn, what a handsome dude. 

And then, he frowned.

Where did that come from? 

And as all of this should at least get his attention, Dean was too exhausted to ponder about it right now. Deciding to inspect it later, he rushed below the deck to strip some of the additional layers he still had on - specifically his waterproof clothes and fleece jacket. He took off his hat too, hanging it at the hook. God, he was so tired. He sent quick messages to his family, reassuring them he was still alive. Then, he took Baby’s documents from under his navigation station and stepped onto the deck, closing the Impala from the outside.

He looked around. The water was glistening, Baby’s black hull shining in the sun. White clouds were lazily traveling through the sky, showing absolutely no trace of earlier mist. The other boats at the marina - mostly Swedish, some of them Norwegian and Danish - were gently rocking on the water. There was one British vessel, a small sloop two yachts over. Unsurprisingly, the Impala was the only boat with the US ensign.

Dean secured the folder with the documents that he'd stashed safely under his arm and hurried through the quay to the harbormaster's office. He knocked at the door and entered a spacious, bright room. On the wall, over the leather couch, hung the TV with the weather forecast. Under it, on a corkboard, he could see some local, sea-related ads. 

On the other side of the room, sitting in front of a white desk, a small blonde lady greeted him in perfect English. Dean smiled at her.

“First time in Visby?” She asked.

“Yes, that would be true,” he responded, handing her the folder and his sailing certification. She took it and started to fill up some data on her laptop.

“Long way from home, aren’t you?” She smiled and he nodded. ”What is the last port you docked in and where are you headed?”

“Uh... almost three days ago I sailed from Sandvig and I’m not sure yet where I’ll go next.”

“How long would you like to stay?”

“Let’s start with today, for now. How does the weather forecast for the next few days look?” Dean asked, giving her the cash for the port fee.

“It is promising, for now, though we’re supposed to meet some strong gusts on Wednesday, with possible storms ahead. I’ll keep you updated.” She gave him back his documents, handing him the receipt and some change. “The toilets are to your left. The bathroom is shared with other sailors, I’ll provide you with the code to enter it.”

He thanked the nice lady and went back to his boat, trying to decide if he should go straight to sleep or take a shower first. He smelled bad, a nice shower would definitely help relax his sore muscles.

Shower it is, then.

He took his toiletries and a towel and shuffled back to the bathroom.

He pushed the code and the door unlocked. The bathroom was a small space with two shower cabins. Somebody was already inside one of them, Dean could hear the sound of water splashing on the tiles. He put his things on the bench and started to take his clothes off with sluggish movements, his brain in a haze. After a moment, the other shower user turned off the water and the cabin door opened. Before him, the towel loosely on his hips stood the dark-haired stranger from before. The beard from earlier was gone and his hair was dripping with water.

“Hello,” he said. His voice was incredibly rich and deep, rumbling through the small space. Dean swallowed. The guy was staring straight at him now and Dean found himself unable to tear his eyes away from the intense gaze.

“Hi, uh... Thank- thank you for your help. Um. Earlier, with berthing?” He was clearly sleep-deprived at this point, and formulating normal sentences was beyond his reach.

“No problem at all. I’m glad I could help.” The stranger smiled shyly. His English, like almost every person in Scandinavian countries, was flawless. The guy glanced at Dean’s bare torso and Dean was suddenly very aware of his state of undress.

“I’ll leave you to your shower,” the stranger said and turned around, facing away from Dean. On his broad back, he had a huge tattoo of black wings, the feathers ending on the back of his arms. Dean swallowed again.

Stop staring at the guy, dammit. 

As Dean decided to resume his undressing, the stranger took the towel off his hips and started to dry his legs, his muscled ass and thighs revealed. Dean’s eyes widened, and he stopped breathing altogether. He was openly gaping now.

Move, Dean. Oh God, he’s going to see me staring and assume I’m a creep. Which I am at this point. 

He quickly stripped off his remaining clothes and ran to the shower cabin, locking himself inside, his heart beating fast. He tried to calm himself down, not understanding why he was agitated in the first place. It’s not like seeing naked people had made him stressed before. He had a gym membership, he worked out, and he had showered at the common showers before, with other dudes no less.

So why was he reacting like that now? It was really confusing. 

He stepped under the water stream, thinking. The guy was handsome, he had sharp facial features and a strong jaw. His shoulders were broad, muscles visible. Even his tattoo was stunning - incredibly detailed and well-made. Maybe Dean was just intimidated by him.

Or maybe not, Dean’s brain supplied.

He blinked a few times. Whatever was going on inside of his head, he should inspect it after he got some rest. He was awake for far too long. Satisfied with this temporary solution, he washed himself thoroughly. Then, he turned the water off and dried himself. He put a new pair of underwear on and stepped out of the cabin. He was now alone in the bathroom.

He didn’t even tell me his name, Dean thought. 

He put on some sweatpants and a T-shirt, his brain refusing to let go of a subject.

Dude must be one of the other sailors if he had the code to enter the bathroom, he thought while brushing his teeth.

When he finished with the cleaning, Dean went back to his boat and connected the electricity cable. Too tired to cook, he lay down on the bed and almost instantly fell asleep. 

+

Dean woke up disoriented, with a grumbling stomach. It was still dark outside. He reached for his phone and squinted at the too-bright screen. It was almost 3 AM. He slept for an absurd amount of time, but given the state of his exhaustion, it wasn't weird. He started, however, to feel really hungry.

He pulled himself up and stretched, assessing the state of his muscles. The fatigue was almost completely gone. He needed to pee though, so he stood up, put his fleece jacket on, and opened Baby’s door, stepping on the companionway.

The night was peaceful, but chilly, stars visible. Dean rushed to the quay, directing his steps to the bathroom.

The guy from yesterday reemerged in his mind.

With his brain now well-rested, he took his time to unwrap the awkward meeting of a blue-eyed stranger. As far as he remembered, he had never had such a reaction to another man, except for this one time he had gone with his friend to a Guns N’ Roses concert on his birthday, and he'd gotten to meet the whole band backstage after the show. Charlie had said something about his crush on the bassist, but honestly, who wouldn’t tear up a little while shaking hands with Duff McKagan and Slash?

Anyway, it was true that the guy from yesterday was nicely built and tanned, and had this incredible tattoo on his back, but it wasn’t a reason for Dean to act like a groupie, was it?

He used the toilet and washed his hands, then glanced at himself in the mirror. He was due for a haircut and a shave, but overall he didn’t look half bad. 

Why does it matter? Thought Dean to himself. His brain was acting super strange during those past few hours.

He directed his steps back to the Impala. Lost in his thoughts, Dean almost missed the barely audible whisper that came from one of the boats to his right.

“Hey!” 

Dean turned his head towards the noise and saw the guy from before, sitting in the cockpit of one of the white sloops named Sweet Magdalene, with a bowl of something steaming in his hand. He smiled at Dean.

Shit. He’s got a nice smile, too.  

Dean suddenly felt his heartbeat rising and a blush creeping down his neck. Thank God it was so dark. His stomach chose this exact moment to grumble.

The stranger grinned. “I can share my stew with you if you’re interested.”

Dean was indeed very interested, so he nodded, glad for the distraction and the prospect of free food. “Yeah, that would be awesome.”

The guy waved his hand, inviting Dean on the boat. “Wait here,” he said, standing up and vanishing below the deck. Dean sat down and looked at the vessel. It was quite a popular German brand of the boats, the ensign Swedish. Soon after, the guy was back with the bowl and a fork for Dean. It smelled incredible.

“It’s vegan, I hope you don’t mind,” the guy said. Dean would eat cardboard at this point and it was free food, so he was grateful anyway.

Offered by a handsome stranger.

Dean's brain was experiencing some technical difficulties today too, apparently. He did, however, want to eat whatever was in the bowl, even if he didn't understand plant-based diet - which he associated mostly with kale. And Sammy.

“Not at all, thank you,” he replied, taking the dish from the man’s hand and inhaling its contents, digging in. It was as good as it smelled, rich in flavors and spices. Dean moaned around the fork. Who knew vegan food could be this tasty?

“Oh shit, this is great,” he complimented the dish between the bites. “What is it made of? I could swear I could taste the meat inside.” 

“This is a vegan replacement. And lots of vegetables. And some spices. I’m glad you like it,” the guy said, then smiled and resumed his own meal. 

They sat in near silence for a moment, only the clinking of the forks audible. 

After his hunger was more or less satisfied, he discretely glanced at his companion. The guy couldn't be much older than Dean - he had some wrinkles, but all of them were in the right places. He wore a dark, warm-looking hoodie this time. Suddenly, Dean remembered that he hadn't even introduced himself.

“I’m super rude, you’ve just given me a meal, and helped me before, and I still don’t know your name. I’m Dean.” He extended his hand in greeting.

The man looked at him, a soft smile forming on his lips. He shook Dean’s hand, and their eyes locked again. His palm was warm and smooth. “Nice to meet you Dean, I’m Castiel.”

Dean smiled. Castiel. “You’ve got a very unique name,” he said. Everything about the guy was unique so far, Dean noticed. 

Castiel chuckled. “Yes, it is quite unpopular. I’m named after an angel, actually. My father clearly had a vision, because I’m not the only one of my siblings named after one.” 

“Well, unique doesn’t mean bad, y’know. I’d say it’s one of a kind. That’s good.” Dean took another bite of the stew. Castiel sat in silence observing him, his bowl empty. Dean could feel his gaze on his face. He swallowed, then said, “so, what’s the deal with vegan food anyway?” 

“Oh, um...” Castiel looked at the deck, thinking. “My son wanted to try this diet a while ago and it grew on me. We’re trying to eat plant-based now. I’m quite fond of the animals, too.” He glanced at Dean again with a careful smile. Dean suddenly wanted to know more about vegan food. Can you make a plant-based pie? It had to be possible, right?

“Would you like some tea? Or a beer?” Castiel asked quietly, but his deep voice still rumbled in the confined space between them.

“Yeah, beer would be nice, thanks.”

Castiel went below the deck again, taking the dirty dishes with him and leaving Dean to his thoughts.

Castiel. One of the angels, huh? He was almost positive his mom had never mentioned such an angel in her papers, but Dean made a mental note to check it later.

He’s got a son. And some siblings. 

Castiel reemerged in the cockpit with an opened bottle of a local beer and some tea for himself. Dean took the beer, grateful.

“Thank you. Y’know, if it wasn’t for you, I would’ve had to cook something, and right now I don’t really feel like cooking," he said, then took a swig from the bottle. The beer was quite tasty.

“It’s hard to blame you, it’s the middle of the night, after all. Although it is interesting that you’re walking hungry through the harbor at 3 AM,” Castiel chuckled. Dean laughed with him then shrugged. 

”What can I say, my sleep schedule is fucked. Before I berthed here, which you witnessed firsthand, I had been underway for more than 30 hours.” He paused, looking at the vessel they were sitting at. “And uh, what about you? I mean, I’m not the only one with weird sleeping hours apparently, huh?”

“I just couldn’t sleep today.” Castiel looked at the sky, lost in thoughts. “I need to deliver Sweet Magdalene to her new owner in a few days,” he added and took a sip from his mug. Dean nodded. “Is this your boat, Dean?” Castiel asked after a moment, pointing at the Impala.

“Yeah, that’s Baby.” He grinned, looking at his boat with pride.

“She’s very beautiful. Captivating.” Castiel said, then hesitated. ”May I ask, is there a reason you named a boat after an antelope?”

Dean snorted. Castiel frowned at him, tilting his head in confusion. “I mean, impalas are normally brown, and your hull is all black.” Dean only laughed harder. The guy was hilarious. Castiel squinted his eyes and opened his mouth to say something, but Dean started talking first, deciding to stop this weird train of thought of his companion. 

“No antelope, dude. She’s named after a car, Chevrolet Impala. I’ve always found the model from 1967 beautiful. And Baby here was originally built the very same year,” he paused, watching Castiel, understanding forming on his face. ”Although, I did remodel her with my brother and dad back in the US. She was a wreck before, bought from some dude. She had drowned in the ocean, but they had managed to pull her out.”

“You did a splendid job then. She looks incredible.”

Dean nodded. "Thanks, man," he said. She was his pride and it was oddly satisfying to hear the praise from the man.

”How fast is she?” Castiel asked after a moment of admiring the boat.

“Yeah, Baby is fast alright,” Dean grinned, and added, “I’d love to show you sometime.” 

Why did I just say that?

Castiel smiled at him warmly, his eyes shining in the dark. “I think I’d like that, too,” he said softly. Dean felt a flutter in his stomach, his mouth suddenly too dry. He looked away.

What is going on? 

He took a swig of his beer again. Why couldn’t he act normal around this man? Was Castiel so much different than other guys he knew? 

Calm the fuck down, you’re acting weird again. 

“So um. Do you do boat deliveries often?” Asked Dean in an attempt to change the subject.

“Sometimes. During the season though, I mostly sail as a skipper on different vessels. I work for a local company, they organize a crew, food, and a sailboat for me.”

Ok, so Castiel was apparently a full-time sailor, working literally at sea. That was super cool if you asked Dean.

“Man, I envy you. I’m here only because I basically ran away from my own company, leaving my little brother to do the job almost by himself.” Dean shook his head. He was miserable, wasn’t he? “I hate sitting at the office all day, doing paperwork. I did that for a few years now, but uh… The sea was calling, y’know?” He looked at Castiel, who was already looking back at him, his expression open.

“I know, Dean.” He looked down and bit his lower lip, thinking. Then, he said quietly, ”I’m grateful for my life, I wouldn’t change my job for any other, although I miss my son greatly while I’m on the boat," he paused, then added, "it can get a bit lonely, don’t you think?”

Dean nodded in agreement. It was a choice, being alone with his Baby, but even if he cherished solitude, he had started to feel lonely. Bobby had actually offered to join him for a week or two during his way back to Porto and Dean was considering it quite seriously. 

He looked back at Castiel, who appeared to be lost in his own thoughts. The dude had this cozy vibe going on, calmness surrounding him. The silence between the two of them was pleasant, soothing even. Normally, with anybody else, Dean would be agitated by now, but Castiel’s presence appeared to have a calming effect on him. Although Dean had just met the guy, he thought that he wouldn’t mind sailing with Castiel - which was quite strange since Dean wasn't eager to open up to other people. He had no idea why he was so sure of this soft, fluffy feeling forming in his guts around this blue-eyed man. 

“I couldn’t help but notice your Baby is registered in the USA, and you did mention you are from there. Did you sail here across the ocean?” Castiel asked after a moment.

“Not recently. I sailed her from the US to Europe with my friend a few years ago, to keep her with me in Porto. But this um, journey, let's call it, I started over a month ago.”

“I see. Quite a journey indeed. Did you change crew?”

“Oh, no. I was by myself.” It wasn’t super smart to advertise his solitude to a stranger, but Dean couldn’t shake the feeling that he was safe with Castiel. His companion looked impressed, and Dean felt suddenly very proud of himself. “S’not such a big deal,” he added, cheeks reddening slightly. He looked at his shoes, embarrassed, then back at Castiel.

“I’m afraid I can’t agree with you. This is quite brave, to sail alone so far away from home, Dean,” Castiel murmured softly through the silence of the night, looking at the Impala again. Dean shuddered a little.

“Have you ever been to Visby?” Castiel was looking at him again. Dean schooled his expression, determined to look normal and composed.

“No, it’s actually my first time here. And what about you?”

“Ah, yes. Me and my son - Jack, we live not far from the harbor. He stays with his grandparents while I’m working,” he stopped, adding after a moment, ”the old town is quite lovely. I can show you around tomorrow if you’d like?”

Dean would very much like, so he nodded. He was curious about the town and Castiel himself, so if there was a chance to know both a bit better, Dean would take it. It didn’t escape his attention that Castiel had mentioned only himself and his son. There were also grandparents, apparently? Maybe Castiel's parents? 

Christ, Dean was a stalker now as well.

“So um, Jack? How old is he? Does he sail with you?”

Castiel chuckled. “He’s 13. He’s passionate about many things, but sailing is unfortunately not one of them," he said, then glanced at Dean. "Do you have children?”

“Nah. They’re awesome, but I’m not sure I’d be a good father,” Dean said truthfully, shaking his head. He'd thought about it through the years, especially when the girls he'd dated had their own kids. His last girlfriend had a son and he had bonded with him so fast, that when he had decided to stop seeing Lisa, he had been worried their breakup would hurt little Ben the most. There were also quite a few issues that his old man had left before he died, such as yelling instead of talking to his sons and expecting them to be as manly as possible, in any circumstances. When Bobby had taken over the parenting, he had tried his best to fix whatever John Winchester had broken, but Dean was still afraid he would hurt his future children, even if he didn’t mean to. He knew that Sam had his own trauma to process before his kids had been born. Luckily, Eileen had been there to help him. 

"I realize that I've only known you for a moment, but this is hard to believe," Castiel said, smiling softly, and then continued, looking at the sky. "I'm still not sure if I'm good at being Jack's dad," he admitted. “You, see Jack’s mom died tragically giving birth, she had some rare medical condition, but she refused to terminate the pregnancy.” He stopped and looked at Dean again. ”Jack is my brother’s biological son, but Luke is unfortunately not a very good man. I’ve been given custody over Jack after he had been born. I love him like my own and wouldn’t change a thing, but I was almost sure I would fail him as a parent. Now, when I look at him, all I can see is goodness and love. I think I did quite alright.”

Dean’s heart ached a little at the emotions written on his companion’s face. He had never experienced anything close to this from John - even if Bobby tried his best, he couldn’t completely erase the memories his father had left behind. 

“You sound like a cool Dad. Lucky kid, I guess.” 

Castiel hummed, smiling softly. “I don’t know about that. But I tried my best.” 

They sat in silence for a moment. Dean glanced at his watch - it was almost 4 AM. The sun would soon rise, and he decided he shouldn’t overstay his welcome. “I should probably get out of your hair. Thank you so much for the meal. In exchange, I can offer some breakfast and coffee on the Impala in a few hours. Would 9 AM be okay?”

“Sounds great. I’ll try to rest for a bit, then. Maybe sleep will come easier this time. Thank you for keeping me company, Dean,” Castiel said with a warm smile. 

After they exchanged goodbyes, Dean walked back to his boat feeling lighter than in many days. He went below the deck, closing the door behind him, thoughts rummaging through his brain. Then, he sat at the table and googled Castiel’s name. Apparently, his new friend was an angel of Thursday, which was quite funny since he'd met the guy yesterday, exactly on Thursday.

Maybe the wings on his back are connected to his angelic name? Or maybe he is, like, super religious? 

He decided to ask Castiel some questions later. He scanned through a few more websites, invested in the angelic lore. He knew from his mom’s papers, that the suffix ‘-el’ in the angelic name meant ‘God’ or ‘of God’. Castiel’s name apparently meant ‘a shield of God’.

This is so cool, thought Dean. 

Castiel. 

Although badass, the name itself was a bit long.

What if it would be just Cas? 

He pondered a bit over that, but after a while, he remembered that he had actually invited the guy for breakfast, and the dude ate only vegan stuff. Dean had some jelly and bread, but that wouldn’t be enough to feed his guest. What did Cas eat, anyway? He searched for some shops in the area and found out there was one opening at 7 AM. In that case, he had some time to find a good, plant-based recipe for a nice breakfast. Sam would be so proud of him.

+

Dean stood in the middle of a city square, admiring the view. Cas hadn't been kidding, the city was beautiful. The morning sun shone at the ruins of the old church, all majestic and middle-age'y. Europe was full of old buildings and structures and it never got boring to see more in every place he'd visited. He finally tore his gaze away, turned around, and rushed to the shop.

To his great surprise, vegans didn’t starve, especially not in Sweden. He soon found some milk, butter, and cheese replacements, and even some creme to put on a sandwich. It was truly magic, if not some kind of witchcraft. The amount of vegetables he bought would make Sam cry happy tears, he was sure. He even found a vegan bagel to eat on his way back to the boat.

It turned out to be a tasty, but quite normal bagel. 

Back at Baby, Dean organized all of the ingredients and his utensils. He liked his space clean - sue him. His idea for breakfast was quite simple - good old pancakes. The vegan version wasn't really so different from the normal one once he changed the milk to the oat-based one. He decided to offer some bread too, since Europeans loved their baked goods, as he had learned quickly soon after he had moved to Porto. The bread was rich in flavor and really tasty, especially right from the bakery. And it was vegan - Dean had checked twice before he'd bought it. He put all of the neatly prepared food on the table, right between the plates and forks.

He took his time to brew some coffee. He had one of the little, Italian coffee makers called the Moka Pots, which provided delicious beverages. The divine smell soon filled his nostrils. He glanced at his watch - it was almost 9 AM. He poured the coffee into the two mugs and while he was putting it on the table, he saw through the Impala's window Cas's dark brown hair and his yellow sweater from yesterday, climbing on the deck. He knocked on the open door a moment later, putting his head inside the companionway with a wide grin on his face. 

“Hello, Dean. It smells incredible in here,” he said as he started to walk below the deck.

Dean had a stupid smile of his own that he couldn't quite contain. “Hiya, Cas. I mean - Castiel.”

What if he doesn't like it? This is awkward. Why am I like this? 

Instead of being uncomfortable, Castiel only smiled wider and said, “Cas. I like it.”

Dean felt his cheeks reddening, so he looked at the floor and nodded. It was like his whole body stopped listening to him while Cas was around. He turned to the pan and invited his guest to sit down. “I made some pancakes. All of this is vegan, by the way.”

Castiel looked around the table, his eyes widening. “Thank you, Dean. You really didn't have to.”

“It's nothing, just a simple breakfast. C’mon now, dig in.”

As Dean realized, eating alone wasn't as fun as eating with some company. Those last weeks he dined by himself and it quickly became rather a necessity than a pleasure. Now, however, Cas was making some happy noises between the bites and complemented Dean's first attempt at vegan cooking. It was really pleasant.

“So um," Dean started after a moment. "Back at the bathroom, I noticed you've got some nice ink on your back. And it's huge, too. How did that happen, if you don't mind me asking?”

Cas put his fork down and wiped his mouth with a tissue. “Not at all,” he said with his stupidly deep voice. ”My family - especially my father - is very religious. He wanted all of his children to be as devoted as he was, so he made us go to church and worship a God he believed in. I’ve never shared his enthusiasm, so when I started to be independent, I declined to continue his delusion. One could say it was a bit of a rebellion,” Cas smirked at the memory. ”I moved away from home, stopped spending holidays with them and I’ve got this tattoo - my family was furious, despite the fact they were the ones that had planted the idea inside of my head by giving us all angelic names,” he stopped and looked at Dean, adding smugly, ”and besides, it looks dope.”

Dean snorted. “Well, it does. And fuck’em all if they’re really just a bunch of assholes.” 

Castiel grinned at him. “They are. I mean, not all of them, I have some nice brothers and sisters. And an aunt. And a niece. She’s cool too. What about your family, Dean?”

“Well, I’ve got a brother, his name is Sam. The same one I left in Porto to run the company by himself.” Dean grimaced before continuing. “Anyway, Sammy has a wife - Eileen, and she’s awesome. They have two children, the third one on the way. Um... I have a dad back in the US, but Bobby is not my biological father. He adopted us after our folks had died in a car crash.” 

Cas looked at him sympathetically. “I’m sorry to hear it, Dean.”

“It was a long time ago, don’t worry about it. I um. I also have some really good friends, I’d say they are my extended family. Especially Charlie - she’s like a little sister. It’s not much, but it’s enough, y’know?”

Castiel nodded again. Broken families and shitty stories were apparently something they had in common.

They sipped their coffees in silence - again, very comfortable, to Dean's surprise. After a while, Cas put his mug down and glanced in Dean's direction. “How did you come up with my nickname?” 

The tips of Dean's ears felt a little hot, for no good reason at all. “Oh, uh... it’s just that your name is quite long and I thought... I mean, ‘Cas’ sounds kinda cool.”

“Nobody had ever called me like that,” Cas said quietly and smiled a little. “Do you want to see some of Visby's old town now?”

“That would be awesome,” Dean agreed. “When I went shopping earlier, I saw some ruins. It would be nice to know more about it.”

They cleaned up together, washing the dishes and putting the leftovers back in the fridge. Cas excused himself to change and use the bathroom, and Dean decided to do the same. It looked like the summer weather was settling in for good, so he put on a simple black T-shirt.

They met at the quay near Cas’s boat a few minutes later. Cas had changed into a T-shirt as well, though his was green, and his tanned arms were very muscled - for some reason, that was a detail Dean noticed right away. Also, the wings of his tattoo peeked out from under the hem of his sleeves. Huh. Dean had never really paid attention to other men's muscles - or their tattoos, for that matter. Why was it any different with Cas, though? He tried to focus on anything else, but his gaze kept returning to the black wings every now and then.

“We could start with the name ‘Visby’. It is quite an interesting story, since depending on the translation, it means ‘the pagan place of sacrifices’ or a ‘place of worship’. I find it personally entertaining,” Cas said with barely a smirk on his face, cocking his head to the side. “The old town has got more ruins of churches than actual functioning ones. And a few bars were made inside of those ruins. Quite scandalous,” he explained, making Dean chuckle.  

They took a long walk through the city center and along the town wall. Cas told Dean some funny and strange stories about the place, and Dean found himself laughing at all the awkward jokes. Every time he wasn’t busy staring at the dude’s arms, he admired the beauty of the city. After a while, when they’d seen most of the town and Dean had picked up some souvenirs for Charlie, Cas took him for a beer at a little spot inside the ruin - something Charlie would absolutely kill to see. The place looked like it was straight out of 'The Lord of the Rings', and Dean took about a hundred photos.

“How do you find Sweden so far, Dean?” Cas asked, sipping his cold beer. It was getting hotter every minute, so the refreshment was greatly appreciated.

“I mean, I’ve only seen Visby, but so far, so good. Really nice and helpful folks around here too, giving some mean guiding tours.” He winked and grinned at Cas, who chuckled, shaking his head.

“How long are you planning to stay here?” Castiel asked after a moment.

This, Dean didn’t know. He was well rested and the weather was fine, so he could sail to the next place even today. For the first time in a few weeks though, he didn’t want to sail yet. The city was truly captivating, with its little, beautiful houses and majestic ruins, the sea shining in the background. He felt at peace and discovered that he wanted to actually stay here, at least a little bit longer.

“I’m not sure yet. I’ve got so far, maybe I should take a couple days off?" He finally muttered, glancing back at his companion. "What about you?"

“I’m planning to sail out Tuesday morning. I’m going to stay at home until then. I came here yesterday to prepare a boat a little bit since the owner had no idea what state she was in. I tested her under sail and I think she should be safe to go for now, but they should buy some new sails soon.”

Dean felt his good spirits leaving his body. He might have planned a marathon of ‘The Lord of the Rings' - extended edition movies with Cas this evening, which clearly wasn’t going to happen. He understood the situation, though. Dean was here on an vacation, but Castiel had work to do and a son to take care of. He tried very hard not to sulk.

They finished their beers and paid for the drinks. It was time to get back to reality, anyway - Dean had started getting tired, and Cas had his own plans. They slowly went back to the quay, chatting about the state of the Sweet Magdalene. 

“How do you know so much about boats, anyway?” Asked Dean, impressed by Castiel’s knowledge.

“I… used to race a lot, back in the day. We had to do our own repairs, know our vessels, so we could depend on them,” Cas said, looking at the sea shimmering in the distance.

“Are you serious? That’s awesome! I used to sail as a kid, but I never competed. My friend and I took Baby for a few races on the ocean near Porto, but it was only for fun, y'know?”

Castiel nodded, and Dean had the strange feeling that the guy's shoulders loosened a little. “It used to be an excellent escape from my father, I was quite good at it too. And it was addictive, to win.” He looked at Dean with his intense, blue eyes. “And what about you? Why do you know so much about boats? You did mention you rebuilt the Impala, but with the boat her age and shape, you have to be a specialist to do it well. And she looks like you know what you're doing, Dean.”

“You got me,” Dean chuckled nervously, squirming under his companion's gaze. The thing was, he didn't like to admit he was building boats for life. It was automatically associated with great wealth and general snobbiness - Dean was neither super-rich nor a snob. He had some money and the business was going well, but he and Sammy worked really hard to build high-quality vessels and pay some good money for their workers and associates. Dean just loved to create beautiful boats with his own hands, and that would be it. He looked away, formulating his thoughts. He didn't want to lie to Cas, either.

“You remember I mentioned my dad, Bobby?" Cas nodded, so Dean continued. "So yeah, he’s a shipwright. He taught me everything he knew, and I started learning when I was young. He helped me with the Impala, too. That's basically how I became quite good at this, I guess.”

"Ah. That makes sense."

They reached the harbor a moment later. Castiel glanced at the sky, and then back at Dean, who was now studying the messiness of Cas’s hair. 

“So…” started Dean, with no clue how to finish. He wanted to invite Cas over, but the man had to go back to his kid.

Castiel’s eyes locked with his again. “Thank you, Dean, for the meal and your company. I hope this is not the only time we'll see each other.” He extended his hand for Dean to shake. Dean did the same. Cas had really big hands, he noticed. The warmness of the touch spread over Dean's body.

“Yeah. Thank you too. For the stew at 3 AM, and showing me around the city. I’d be happy to do it again, sometime.” He grinned at Cas, who smiled back. He really had a nice smile, lightening his whole face and his insanely blue eyes.

Cas took a few steps back, then waved, turned around, and went to the parking lot. Dean observed him for a moment, then finally went back to Baby.

He opened the door and went below deck, with his mind completely blank. He prepared some coffee and sat at the table with the mug.

So, he'd made a friend today. And the guy was... nice. Also, Dean really didn't like watching him go.

Suddenly, the realization hit him. He hadn't asked Castiel any important questions, like his last name or where he was sailing next. How was Dean supposed to meet the guy again, if he didn’t even know those things?

Shit. 

Chapter Text

The next morning Dean hurried to the harbormaster. He'd figured that Cas would eventually show up at the marina and he wanted to reach out before his new friend would sail out. He had briefly thought about staying at the Visby harbor until Tuesday, but the little city lost some of its appeal now that Dean was completely alone again. He scribbled down both his email address and his phone number, then left the note at the office, feeling like an idiot. How could he not realize they hadn’t exchanged at least their phone numbers the day before? They lived quite far away, but they could at least talk on the phone from time to time, right? He had also thought about leaving a note somewhere at Sweet Magdalene's cockpit, but it would undoubtedly get wet sooner rather than later, as eventually everything on the boats did and Dean didn't want to risk it getting unreadable. 

When he returned to the Impala, Dean decided there was no point in staying in Visby any longer. Maybe he would cheer himself up by seeing some cool stuff? The day before, he had found impressive castle ruins on another island, and seeing them seemed like a good plan. He started preparing to cast off. The sky was clear, so he needed to put on some adequate clothing and sunscreen. A hat was also a must if he didn't want to get sunstroke at least. He looked at his phone, ignoring all of his brother’s angry messages for now. He could always call him and Bobby at the next harbor. According to the weather forecast, it should stay sunny and warm for the next twelve hours. 

He turned on the electronics and started the engine, ready to sail out. He glanced in the direction of Sweet Magdalene, but Cas was nowhere in sight. Dean finally tore his eyes away, focusing on Baby. His next stop would be the small town of Borgholm. 

+

The sea had been quite peaceful almost all of the day and the wind had allowed him to sail close-hauled without the need to tack. Around 8 in the evening, it started to die away and Dean slowed to barely 4 knots. He didn’t mind the speed, since he wasn’t in any rush. The Öland island he was sailing to wasn’t really far from Gotland, anyway.

The sun started to set around 9 PM, and the purple and orange light filled the cockpit. It looked dreamy again, and Dean instantly thought of Charlie, who absolutely loved such views. He missed her cheerfulness and jokes.

If he really thought about it, Dean was surprised to discover that his solitude have actually become a little uncomfortable.

His mind wandered to the time he had spent with Cas. The guy had been very easy to talk to and to laugh with. Something clearly drew Dean to the man in a way he had probably never experienced before.

There was also the matter of Dean’s inexplicable desire to admire Cas’s body parts, which didn't actually make any sense. Cas was a guy, a very handsome one, but still, just a guy. Dean’s body, however, had acted like it didn’t get the memo. It was confusing, to say the least, and Dean didn't really know what to do with that particular matter. He should definitely try to contain his strange behavior, especially since he really wanted to spend more time with Castiel and get to know him better.

As his friend.

Doing friendly stuff.

Which, actually, was hard to obtain, if Dean didn’t get any means to contact the guy.

He felt a knot of uneasiness tightening in his gut. The thought of not seeing Cas ever again turned out to be incredibly disturbing and Dean started to get really angry at himself that he hadn't thought of asking for Cas’s number sooner.

As the sky darkened even further, it became colder and damp, so Dean headed below deck and put on extra clothes. He had to turn the navigation lights on as well. A while later, he reemerged in the cockpit with a fresh tea and glanced at the chartplotter, then looked around. The surroundings were almost completely dark now, but he could already see the lights of Öland's coastline in front of the bow, blinking in the distance.

+

He arrived at the Borgholm harbor around 3 in the morning. The wind had died completely at midnight and he'd had to continue the journey with Baby's engine on. Dean glanced at his phone - he had brand new angry messages from Sam and one from Benny, who had sent him a funny meme. He put the device away, deciding to eat before going to sleep this time. He didn’t want to end up hungry before he was well-rested. He still had some leftovers from his vegan shopping yesterday, so he decided to prepare himself some plant-based tacos. He immediately thought that he could make them for Cas the next time they saw each other and it would be rude not to try the recipe first.

Once he ate and took care of the dirty dishes, Dean gathered his stuff and went to take a hot shower. There was nobody in the bathroom, so he took his time shaving and studying himself in the mirror. Maybe he could find a barber in this town? His hair really started to get dangerously long, and he didn’t want to end up like Sammy.

Back at the Impala, he pulled out his phone and searched for Sweet Magdalene’s signal on the vessel finder website, but the other boat’s AIS seemed to be turned off. He sighed, putting the phone away and lying down on his bed. He had no way of telling if Cas was still in Visby. 

Sleep didn’t come easily that night. 

+

Dean was startled awake by the ringtone of his phone. He patted the bed, trying to locate the devilish device. When he finally found it, he started swiping furiously to pick up and end the irritating sound banging on his eardrums.

“Hello?” He slurred through the speaker. 

“Oh good, you're alive. I don't have to collect your body from Sweden after all,” Sam’s voice chirped through the phone.

Dean grimaced. “Still here. You woke me up.”

“Did I now? I would even feel sorry for you, but you're the one who didn't text me back yesterday, you dumbass! We were worried! Where the hell have you been?!”

“Sammy, goddammit, stop shouting. I'm okay. I was um. Sightseeing. With… with a friend.”

Sam went silent for a moment, then asked in his serious voice, “Are you having sex with random people again, Dean? Is this what's happening?”

Dean was suddenly very awake, his blood running cold. He felt like Sam caught him doing something he wasn't supposed to - except this time Dean had done absolutely nothing wrong. He felt a simmering anger building inside of him.

“No! Nothing like that. I met a guy and he gave me a tour around Visby. And we had some beer,” he huffed, then added for good measure, "and even if I did have meaningless sex, it would be none of your business, bitch!” 

“Alright, but don't disappear on me again, jerk. You act like a baby, Dean. You're being stubborn for no reason at all.” He heard Sam taking a deep breath. “Okay, now tell me how's Sweden. And for the record, I want some souvenirs, from wherever you are, for all of my kids, even the one that isn’t born yet.”

Dean rolled his eyes. He knew his brother meant well, but sometimes he was just nosy and annoying.

They talked a little about Visby and his sailing through the mist. He didn’t want to worry Sam too much, so he skipped the details. Dean only managed to mention Cas to his brother, but he couldn't tell him much because Sammy was almost late for work and had to end the conversation.

“Call me later. And don’t disappear again. I mean it, Dean,” Sam finally said.

“Alright, alright, give me a break,” Dean grumbled back.

Once they disconnected, he sat up and checked the time. It was 10 AM already, but he still felt exhausted and irritated. He had slept poorly, tossing and turning in the bed, and the talk with Sam’s made him feel even more anxious. He unlocked his phone again, deciding to search for barbers in the area. If he couldn't do anything about his mood, he could at least fix his hair.

When he managed to make an appointment for this afternoon, Dean put some clothes on and ate a leftover taco from last night. It was still tasty, even cold. He moved around the boat collecting his phone, a wallet, and some water and finally, he stepped onto the deck and closed Baby’s door. He was surprised to discover that the weather had changed to shitty - a mist started to form and there was no wind at all. It was a good thing he had planned sightseeing, anyway.

Dean had actually chosen to sail to Borgholm because of the quite impressive castle ruins he wanted to visit here. He was pretty sure it was the next place Charlie would absolutely die to see. He started walking slowly towards the ruins. 

+

There was no doubt that the castle had been magnificent, back in the day. As he quickly discovered studying the pamphlet, at the castle grounds music concerts were sometimes held, which Dean found incredibly cool. The structure had been restored through the years, and different parts had been added or destroyed. Unfortunately, it had never been fully rebuilt after a huge fire that took place a long time ago.

Dean took his time exploring different staircases and dungeons, quickly realizing that discovering them with an actual guide would be much better. Of course, he thought about Cas again - he was sure that the guy not only knew about the existence of the castle but would be able to tell tons of stories about it.

On his way back to the town he decided to call Bobby. Dean really missed his grumpy voice and the old man was probably waiting for an update on his sailing. 

Bobby greeted him with a grumble. “It’d better be important, boy.” 

“Hello to you too, Bobby. How are you doin’?”

“I was great before you called. Are you in trouble?”

“No, why would I be?” Dean chuckled. Bobby was truly one of a kind. “Can’t I just call to uh… hear your voice? How are things? How’s Ellen and Jo?”

A few years back, Bobby had started seeing a local bar owner, Ellen. Just like Bobby, she had lost her spouse. She was a sturdy woman, never afraid to say what was on her mind. She and Bobby had connected quickly. Dean was grateful for her presence in the old man’s life, especially since he and Sam had moved to another country. Ellen had a daughter who used to have a crush on Dean, but he could never bring himself to take Jo seriously. She was as fierce and intelligent as her mom.

“They’re fine. We’re fine. All is fine. Better tell me how the old boat is doing.”

“She’s great. I only had some difficulties with the furling drum before I berthed in Sweden, but I can’t seem to find the problem. It definitely needs to be looked at again.”

“Damn right, it does. And how was the weather while you were underway?”

Dean told Bobby about his journey to Visby. He always told him more than he could ever tell his brother simply because Bobby never overreacted. He listened to Dean’s tale calmly and with interest, asking the right questions. When Dean mentioned meeting Cas, Bobby almost immediately realized that he wasn’t telling him the whole story.

“Keep yer secrets, boy, but watch yer back, you hear me? And don't be stupid.”

Dean frowned. “Why would you say that? I always watch my back, you know that.”

“What I know is that you love some trouble, boy. Have you considered me joining you on the way back?"

Dean smiled. Sailing with his old man again sounded great, especially since he couldn't shake the strange feeling of loneliness that accompanied him now.

“Yeah, I think it’d be nice to see your old mug soon. 'Sides, there is nobody shouting at me that I’m doing everything too slow, and that’s unacceptable,” he said.

Bobby grumbled at him a little but in a very loving way. 

+

After visiting a barber and buying some souvenirs for Charlie and all of Sam’s kids, Dean went to the local restaurant to eat dinner. He curiously scanned the menu for vegan options, but the only plant-based dish he found was french fries. It turned out vegans could starve in some places in Sweden, after all.

When Dean walked out of the restaurant, he decided to go back to the Impala and get some good night's rest. He valued the nights he stayed at the harbors - he could sleep for at least six hours straight, which was simply not possible underway, even with the best technology. While sailing on autopilot, he had to check regularly if he wasn't in any danger, so there was no real way to relax.

Since his new haircut turned out okay, he pulled out his phone and Facetimed Sam, because he was such an incredible brother (and also maybe to remind him that his hair was really too long). Then, he checked the weather forecast for the next few days - apparently, the wind was supposed to come back in the morning, so Dean decided to resume his journey then.

Satisfied with his plan, he locked the door to the Impala and turned off the lights. He lay down with a thought that Cas had planned to sail from Visby the day after tomorrow. It meant his new friend should be able to get Dean's note with his phone number on it, and finally contact him. If he didn't, Cas would at least switch on Sweet Magdalene's AIS by then and Dean could check where the guy was headed. In the back of his mind, he realized he acted pretty creepy, but if it came down to it, he wanted to know whether the guy had stayed in Visby or not.

Dean felt more tired by the minute, his eyelids heavy, until he finally fell into a dreamless sleep.

+

A loud rumble woke Dean up. When he heard another one, he realized it was thunder.

A storm? The hell did that come from? 

He looked through the window at the heavy, dark clouds hanging above him. He frowned, then reached for his phone and checked the weather radar. There it was, a brand new, angry cloud formed over Öland island, heading north-east. He could now hear heavy drops patting on the deck outside.

So there went his plans for at least the next few hours. He sat up and looked around. There was nothing he could do about the weather except wait it out. He suddenly realized it also meant Cas would probably have to postpone his departure since the storm would also hit Gotland in a few hours.

Dean considered calling the harbormaster in Visby to make sure Cas wouldn’t sail straight at the storm clouds, but he decided that would be going overboard. The guy was a professional, there was no way he’d miss the change of the weather.

After a moment of considering his options, Dean decided to watch 'Star Wars' to kill some time and keep his mind away from Castiel.

+

By the next morning, the storm had finally passed and the wind started to die away a little, leaving only the unpleasant rain behind. Cas still hadn't contacted Dean, but there was a chance the guy didn't make it to the harbor yet. It was past 8 AM when Dean, clothed for heavy rain, finally took off from Borgholm, sailing south. Since he wasn't sure what his next stop would be, he decided to observe the changes in the wind direction and sail accordingly, for now. He had found a little Danish island near Bornholm that looked pretty, and if the wind didn’t change its direction, he considered sailing there.

A few hours later the rain finally stopped and the clouds slowly began to dissipate. On the chartplotter Dean saw some sailboats near his route, pointing in all directions. He pulled out his phone and looked at the screen. He was still close to land, so he had a reception. Tempted to call the harbormaster in Visby and check if Cas had taken his note, Dean finally dialed the number.

The lady from before greeted him through the speaker.

“Hi. I'm Dean Winchester, captain of the Impala. A few days ago I stayed at your marina. I'm just wondering, did the Sweet Magdalene sail out yet?”

“Yes, the vessel departed on Sunday evening. Unfortunately, the skipper didn't contact me before, since the fee had been paid beforehand. When he comes back, I’ll be sure to pass your note to him.”

An ugly feeling spread in Dean’s stomach. So Cas hadn't even gotten a chance to read his note. He had no way of contacting the guy now and he didn’t know where he had sailed. Fortunately, Cas lived in Visby, so he would have to visit the harbormaster’s office eventually, but it could take weeks for him to get back, as far as Dean knew.

He thanked the lady and hung up, suddenly feeling very angry at himself. He could've stayed in Visby. Why the hell had he decided to sail out to Öland on Saturday? It had been so stupid of him to depend on one little note.

There wasn't much he could do now, though.

Frustrated, he went below the deck to fill the Impala’s logbook. 

+

Dean took his first power nap after about 10 hours of sailing. He re-emerged in the cockpit one hour later to scan his surroundings and check the chartplotter. There was almost no traffic for now, but Dean knew it would change in about two hours. He decided it would be safe to get some more sleep until then and went below deck.

A loud ringing noise of the chartplotter woke him up. Instantly alert, he hurried outside and looked around, but saw no immediate threat. He glanced at the computer screen, still ringing loudly. The chartplotter had a built-in alarm that informed him if other vessels were too close to Impala’s route. This seemed to be the case here - there was indeed a cargo ship not far away, and if Dean stayed on the course, he would get dangerously close to the other vessel. He corrected the steering wheel, turning a little left. The noise stopped almost immediately.

That should do it.

He looked around again. Behind him, the coastline of Sweden was now barely visible. He glanced at his watch - 10 in the evening. The wind died away and Baby slowed to 4 knots. Dean stretched, his arms above his head. He was still tired, but it wasn’t as bad as before. He decided to make some coffee and stay in the cockpit for a while.

It was a quiet night, the sky was almost clear and black now. His earlier anger had almost completely disappeared, replaced by sadness - which was worse, really. He started to realize it was possible he wouldn’t see Cas ever again. Even if the guy eventually came back to Visby, there was no guarantee he would want to call Dean. Why would he? They had seen each other for less than a day, after all.

God, Dean was truly ridiculous.

He decided to listen to some music to cheer himself up a bit. Classic rock was always a good choice. He went below the deck to pick up a playlist, finally deciding on AC/DC.

+

“Impala, Impala, this is Sweet Magdalene, over,” a deep voice rumbled through the radio speaker sometime after midnight.

Dean jumped in his seat at the navigation station, where he had been studying a paper chart moments before, a silly smile forming on his face.

Cas 

He almost dropped the speaker microphone, grabbing it clumsily while trying to press the button to respond.

“Sweet Magdalene, this is Impala. Change to channel 69. Over,” he said quickly, then took the portable radio, and rushed to the deck, switching the channels. He checked the chartplotter for the AIS signal of the Sweet Magdalene, but he didn’t see any markers indicating the other vessel was close.

“Impala, this is Sweet Magdalene,” short pause, and then, “Hello, Dean” came a deep, rich voice again. Cas sounded like he was smiling.

“Hiya, Cas. It’s so good to hear from you!”

Dean started to scan the area, looking for his friend’s boat, grinning like a madman. Cas contacted him. Cas was here. Finally, he saw a gentle, green light to his left - probably Castiel’s sailboat on the starboard side. “I couldn’t find you on the vessel finder and started to get really worried, man,” Dean said again.

“Ah, yes, Sweet Magdalene’s AIS is unfortunately broken. I can see you on the chartplotter, but you wouldn’t be able to see me. And it’s really good to hear from you, too.”

“I left you a note at the harbormaster’s office in Visby, but I heard you had sailed out earlier and had never gotten to the office. What happened?” Dean asked.

“As soon as I realized there would be a storm, I decided to leave earlier to avoid it. I was quite successful.”

So Cas had known there would have been a storm, as Dean had predicted. “But how did you know the storm was coming in the first place, Cas? I double-checked the weather forecast the night before and there was no sign of it. It looked like it appeared out of nowhere.”

“Let’s just say the weather between the Swedish islands can be tricky. I am quite accustomed to it by now. I could see there was a storm forming and it would be impossible to sail out on Tuesday,” Cas paused, and then added, ”I was hoping you were still at the harbor when I came back on Sunday, but the Impala was gone. I wanted to give you my phone number, at least.”

Dean’s heart skipped a beat. Cas had wanted to give him his phone number.

He wanted to keep in touch with Dean, too. 

“Man, I’m so mad at myself that I left in the first place. I had this stupid idea to see Borgholm Castle. I mean, the ruins were great, but it was super dumb to leave without making sure you had my phone number, man.” Dean was so excited he totally forgot to be cool, so he probably sounded and looked like a moron. It was a blessing, really, that nobody could see him and judge his face in the dark.

“Borgholm castle ruins are exquisite. I’m happy you liked it. I could show you more places like that around Öland one day if you’d like,” Cas said.

“I kinda figured you’d be a perfect tour guide for this. That would be really cool, Cas,” Dean paused, thinking. If Castiel wanted to show him around Sweden, maybe Dean could invite him to Portugal? He looked towards the green light, which was shining a little closer than before.

“And by the way, fancy meeting you here. What are the odds, right?” Dean asked. He realized it was a miracle itself that he and Cas had bumped into each other in the middle of the sea.

Cas chuckled. “Yes, especially in those circumstances, don’t you think?” His voice was smooth and soothing, like the velvet night above them. 

Dean looked up at the starry sky. This far from any land, whole constellations were shining brightly, undisturbed, and almost at the grasp of a hand. 

“It sure is beautiful out here,” Dean said quietly.

Cas hummed. They admired the peaceful night in the comfortable silence.

“Did you know,” Cas said after a moment, “that we can clearly see the whole Virgo constellation from here? It is possible only in the especially dark sky. Actually, it’s straight ahead of you.”

Dean strained his eyes, trying to make sense of little, gleaming dots. His knowledge of the night sky was very limited. He did know how to locate the Northern Star, but that was about it. 

“I can see some stars, man, but to be completely honest with you, I have no idea which is which.”

“Ah, I see. Let’s try something more visible then,” Cas paused. Dean waited.

“Can you see the noticeably brighter dot at your bow?” 

This time, Dean spotted the exceptionally visible, shining star slightly to the right of his jib.

“Yeah, I think I can see it. What’s it called?”

“This is the brightest of the stars of Boötes constellation, Arcturus. Its name means ‘the Guardian of the Bear’.”

Dean let his imagination roam. “Is it because it chases the Great Bear around the sky?” 

“That is… I’m not sure, I do know, however, that the Boötes constellation is mentioned in ‘The Odyssey’.” Cas paused, and then added, “it is one of my favorite stories, actually. I’m really fond of Odysseus’s journey, his long-awaited coming home.”

Sadly, Dean couldn’t bring forth any specific details from the book he had read a long time ago. He suddenly really wanted to read it again. He did remember only one thing, thanks to his studies about sea creatures he had done a few days prior.

“You know, the journey part is also cool. Didn’t Odysseus meet a whole bunch of sexy sirens on his way?”

“That would be true,” Cas chuckled. They fell silent again. Dean scanned more of the infinite sky. To his surprise, he felt happy and completely at peace. Despite being alone on his boat, in this vast space of only water and darkness, Dean could feel a connection slowly forming with another human soul. 

Eventually, Dean spotted more sea traffic on his route, which required some attention from both of them. 

“Cas, can you see the cargo ship on the map to our left? I think we should change course a bit so it stays on the stern.”

“Yes, I’ve been observing it for a while now. I guess I should’ve started with this question, but… where are you headed, Dean?”

Dean chuckled, then shook his head in disbelief. He had been so absorbed in the fact that Cas was here at all, that he had honestly forgot to ask him the same question.

“I’m headed to Christiansø Island. Heard it is really beautiful.”

“That’s correct,” Castiel stopped and then added after a moment, ”actually, I think I might be able to stop there as well and show you around tomorrow if you’d like. The marina is quite small, but the island is lovely. And there are seals.”

“You’re kidding me!”

“I’m certainly not. And I think we should hurry up with the course changing if we don't want to give the crew of this cargo ship a heart attack.”

Once both sailboats were back on their route and safe from any potential collisions, Cas moved the Sweet Magdalene a little bit closer to the Impala. Dean could see his friend’s dark contour behind the steering wheel, faintly illuminated by a red compass light. Suddenly, an idea formed in his head. He checked his speed - it was 4,5 knots. Cas’s boat, however, appeared to sail a little bit faster than Dean’s, despite the smaller sails of Sweet Magdalene. Dean observed his own mainsail for a while, trying to figure out the differences in their sail setting. He finally decided to trim the mainsail a little bit, using a winch. The noise caught Cas’s attention. His boat was so close now that they could communicate without the radio.

“Are you trying to race me, Dean? That would be very unwise.”

Dean grinned and glanced at the speed again. 5 knots. “Loser will have to cook breakfast. Don’t tell me you’re afraid of losing, Cas.”

“I’m only afraid of hurting your ego. But if you really insist, you can try to catch up to me,” he said smugly.

What a little shit. 

Dean felt a rush of adrenaline. He saw Cas adjusting his course and then fumbling with the jib sheets. Sweet Magdalene sailed faster almost immediately. Cas hadn't been kidding, he knew what he was doing.

Dean followed Cas’s example and adjusted his own course. Their position allowed Dean to cover Sweet Magdalene’s sails with his a little, which evened out their speeds for a moment. Cas reacted quickly and changed his course. After a short time, he took the lead again. His boat was lighter than Baby, but the Impala was built to race. Cas’s clever tactics, however, allowed him to stay in front of Dean’s sailboat, undoubtedly winning their little competition. Dean was sure that Cas would absolutely destroy him if they switched vessels.

“Cas, you sonofabitch!” Dean called him on the radio, laughing. They were too far away to talk normally again.

“I told you this was a stupid idea, Dean. You seem to be a very stubborn man. I hope you still have some vegan ingredients to feed me in Christiansø,” He responded cheerfully. Dean saw Cas's figure turn, probably towards him. “Now, would you excuse me, I need to use the head. I’ll leave you here to sulk for a moment.” 

Dean saw Cas’s silhouette disappearing below the deck. Damn, maybe he’d be able to convince the guy to come to Portugal and race on Baby with him instead of against him? With such skills, they could even take part in some serious regatta.

Dean smirked. The lost bet was so worth it. 

Luckily, Dean hadn't eaten everything he'd bought for Cas's previous breakfast, so he could still make something vegan for the both of them. Secretly, he was happy that he could cook for the guy again and show off his culinary skills a little.

A few minutes later, Cas reemerged on the deck and walked behind the wheel. He evened their speeds, slowing Sweet Magdalena slightly. They sailed like this until the wind died down completely, forcing them both to start their engines and drop the sails.

“Dean, can I ask you something?” Cas asked via radio after a while. The rumble of the engines was too loud to talk without the device.

“Yeah, sure. Shoot.”

“What do you feel when you sail?”

Dean remembered himself standing on a beach in Newport, all those years ago - the wind in his hair, the overwhelming peace.

“That’s an easy one. I feel free.” I feel like myself. “What about you?”

“I…feel safe. But I suppose I also feel free, in a way,” Cas murmured. 

They stayed silent for a moment.

“Can I ask you a question now?”

“Of course, Dean.”

“Have you seen ‘The Lord of the Rings' - extended edition?” 

Cas snorted. Dean realized he really liked the sound of his laugh. He grinned. 

“No, I can’t say I have,” Cas replied.

“Alright, that’s settled then. We’re gonna watch it together. How long can you stay at Christiansø?”

“Until the next morning, I suppose.”

It wasn't ideal, and they certainly wouldn’t be able to watch all three movies, but Dean would take what he could get. 

“Okay, so listen up, that’s what we’re gonna do - we’re gonna berth in the marina, then I’ll prepare both of us something to eat. We should squeeze some sleep somewhere around here, I guess. After that, you’ll show me around the island and we’ll do the movie night. How does that sound?”

“Reasonable.” It was still too dark to see his face, but Cas sounded like he was smiling again.

They continued to talk about insignificant stuff. As Dean quickly realized, Cas had read plenty of books, but he desperately needed to catch up on modern movies since his knowledge of the subject was next to zero. Dean felt like a man with a mission, categorizing in terms of relevance movies they needed to watch together.

They chatted about books and movies until sunrise. The golden light reflected on the surface of the sea, lighting Sweet Magdalene as well. Dean saw Cas standing in the cockpit at Dean’s right, a blue and yellow waterproof jacket on, his eyes tired. He was smiling though, his eyes boring into Dean’s soul.

“Hello, Dean.”

“Hiya Cas. Rough night?” Dean said, grinning.

“I would say it was rather pleasant. And I cannot wait for my winner's breakfast,” Cas grinned back, then he winked clumsily. It was adorable, really. “I should make some new coffee for myself. I’ll be back in a few minutes. Is that alright?” He asked.

“Yeah, sure. Knock yourself out.” 

When Cas came back with the steaming mug of coffee in his hands, Dean went below his deck to prepare one for himself, reemerging a few minutes later with the hot beverage. He sat on the bench in the cockpit, observing the colors of the morning sky.

“Why doesn't Jack sail with you? I always thought it would be a great quality time to sail with your kid. I often did it with Bobby,” he asked Cas when half of his mug was empty.

“Jack finds sailing a bit boring. He is exceptionally interested in animals, so if there was a prospect of seeing one underway, he would consider coming with me, I think. Maybe I'm just really bad at convincing him, I'm not sure. He's got some strong opinions on many things and sometimes it's hard to come to a compromise.”

“Is he as fluent in English as you are?” Dean asked, wondering if he would be able to communicate with the kid. ”By the way, I'm really impressed by everybody's language skills here. This is insane. I am trying to learn Portuguese, but it's going really slow.”

Cas gave him a warm smile, then looked ahead, paying attention to where he was sailing. “Swedes do learn English at school from a young age. However, I should come, as you say, clean. I'm only half Swedish - my dad is an American, he came to Sweden and met my mother. We used both languages at home, me and my siblings are bilingual. Jack is fluent too, me and him use English to communicate, but his grandparents are both Swedish.” Cas stopped for a moment, then grinned, his eyes still focused on the route. “Did you use the creepy owl app to study? I've heard it bullies you to take the next lesson.” 

Dean snorted. “I'm not making this mistake again, dude. No Duolingo, I’m traumatized to this day. I actually went to a class to learn Portuguese, then I had one-on-one lessons, but I couldn’t find time to continue eventually.” Dean also hooked up with a pretty teacher, but he was reluctant to tell Castiel about this particular detail. “Now I just try to open the textbook once in a while and do some exercises at least. I should probably resume learning the language with a teacher though. It can come in handy to know,” he stopped, glancing at Cas curiously. “Have you ever been to Portugal?”

“I have, actually, but never visited Porto. Is it nice?”

“It can be charming.” 

Would it be weird if Dean just invited Cas to visit him in Porto? Maybe Jack could come too? He bit his lips, thinking. Even if he would find the courage to do it, he should certainly wait until they were at the marina. “And what about the States? Have you been there?” He asked instead.

“A few times. The last time I was there, I was with Jack. I thought it would be nice to show him his roots. He really enjoyed the Grand Canyon and Yellowstone Park. He liked bisons the most, I think.”

“Bison are awesome, dude. No surprise he liked them.”

“I'm starting to suspect you have many things in common with my son,” Cas said, squinting at Dean.

“What can I say, the kid knows what's good,” Dean shrugged his shoulders.

Cas shook his head, a smile flickering across his face. “Where are you from, Dean?”

“Our folks lived in Lawrence, Kansas, but I never really thought of this place as home, y’know? Bobby’s house is in Newport, Rhode Island. Me’n Sammy grew up there.”

“Do you miss living there?”

“Sometimes. It's different here. Customs, language, people. But Europe grew on me,” he stopped, thinking. “I guess I wouldn't want to move back now. And it's not like I have a home I would call my own there. I love Bobby to death, and his house is full of nice memories, but to be honest, I'm more attached to his hangar than the house. You see, after our folks died, we sold their house and split the money. Sammy used it to buy his first flat when he and Eileen got serious. But me, well… I took my part and rebuilt Baby.” He patted the steering wheel lovingly. “She's my home more than any other place now.”

Cas didn't reply, but he looked at Dean with a knowing smile and nodded. They stayed silent for a moment.

Dean glanced at the speed and then the anemometer. He looked around. “I think it's time to hoist the sails.”

They moved efficiently and soon after, both boats were sailing a little over 5 knots on spread sails. The wind blew steadily, and as they turned off the engines.

Dean sighed, taking in a sweet silence that fell over the space. He looked at Cas, his profile clearly visible. He caught himself admiring Cas’s strong jaw and broad shoulders again. It was still a little cold, so the guy had his hat and gloves on, intense gaze focused on the route. It was incredibly hard to imagine he didn’t have a wife or at least a girlfriend, but for some reason, Dean couldn't bring himself to ask the man if he was single.

“Dean, watch where you’re going,” Cas shot him an amused look and smirked.

Dean snapped out of his thoughts and looked at the Impala's route. When he hadn't paid attention, his boat had turned a little right towards Sweet Magdalene. He cleared his throat awkwardly and corrected the course, his cheeks turning red.

+

When the sun was fully up and the temperature began to rise, they started to take off layer after layer. The warm hats and jackets were now gone, replaced by T-shirts and headwear - Dean put his cap on and Cas - well, Cas almost gave Dean a heart attack when he reemerged on his deck wearing a straw cowboy hat. When Dean finally collected his jaw from the floor, he decided to buy himself a similar one, simply because it looked amazing.

Well, it did on Cas, anyway. 

Around 7 AM they finally saw the shore of Christiansø. It was a fairly small Danish island, but the photos Dean had found online had shown some spectacular views. A long time ago a fort had been built on it and the historical buildings apparently remained. The whole place’s population was only about 90 people.

Dean was in the middle of planning breakfast for them both when Cas’s voice pulled him out of his thoughts. Dude had to shout a little due to the loud sound of the waves hitting both hulls.

“Dean, Baby is a little bigger than my boat so you’ll drive first. I’ll berth to your side.”

Dean nodded, then got distracted by Cas’s hat again. It was beige and made the color of his tan and eyes more prominent.

“Cas, do you like westerns?” He asked, grinning.

“I’m… not sure? I saw one or two a long time ago,” he squinted at Dean in confusion. “Why do you ask?”

“The um. The hat? Your cowboy hat?” He waved his hand awkwardly around his head.

“Oh. I see. My niece - Claire gave me this on my birthday. I’m not sure why.”

So apparently all the kids in Cas’s family had a great taste. Dean nodded. “Okay, but we need to work on your knowledge of Westerns. I mean, it would be rude not to, since you’ve got a hat already.”

Cas rolled his eyes but grinned. “You’re ridiculous.”

Dean had to agree. He felt ridiculous around the guy, but he couldn’t seem to help it. He eventually decided that there was no point in overanalyzing it all now, that they only had a few more hours together. He glanced at the chartplotter, searching for any possible obstacles on their way. It was almost time to drop the sails again and start the engines to berth. They were getting close to the marina.

Once Dean prepared the fenders and lines, Cas let him take the lead. While he was knotting the last cleat knot, Cas called him to get his attention and pointed to a rock nearby. When Dean turned his head in that direction, he found five gray seals looking right back at him. He gasped in amazement. The seals were clearly unhappy with the engine's sounds, and they jumped into the water, one by one. He suddenly remembered a gray tail he had seen near Gotland Island in the mist and smiled at the memory. He turned his head and grinned at Cas.

The harbor was really tiny, placed between two islands, so it was a challenge to squeeze Baby in. Eventually, Dean managed to do it, turning the engine off after he secured the boat to the quay. Cas berthed gracefully to Dean’s port side and turned his engine off as well.

Dean raised his head and looked at Cas, their eyes met once again. Somehow, they were even more blue than he remembered.

“So…We’re here,” said Dean, unnecessarily stating a fact.

“It appears so, yes,” Cas smirked, cocking his head and squinting his eyes. “I believe you owe me breakfast, Dean.”

“Yeah… yeah. That’s… yeah,” Dean said incoherently.

“I’ll take care of our fees, it could be done via the website here,” Cas stated, pulling his phone out.

“Thanks, that’d be great,” Dean said, getting himself back together. ”Give me five minutes, I’ll start with the meal.” 

He rushed below the deck, taking his cap off. He rubbed his face, feeling the spreading tiredness. He then rummaged through the fridge, finding every vegan thing he still had and putting it on the table. He prepared the plates and coffee and placed them beside the food. His options were sadly limited since he wasn’t prepared to eat with Cas so soon, but he could put together a tasty meal. He decided to keep it nice and simple.

Cas came over a few minutes later, his hair in disarray. He looked as tired as Dean felt, but he was smiling warmly. 

“You’ve got a new haircut. It looks nice,” Cas said. Dean felt his cheeks reddening. “Are you preparing… burgers?” 

“Yep!” Dean said, accenting the ‘p’ at the end. “I’m afraid that’s all I have left, so…”

“I’m really glad I won, then. It smells incredible,” Cas chuckled, sitting at the table. 

Dean grinned, turning to the pan again. For some reason, Cas’s company made him feel giddy. He turned the vegan patties a few times and placed them on the buns he had prepared before. Then, he added vegan cheese and some veggies at the top. He finally sat in front of Cas, putting the plates on the table and waiting impatiently for his guest to take his first bite. The dude closed his eyes and hummed happily, chewing.

Once he swallowed, he looked at his plate in awe. “This is fantastic.”

“Glad you like it,” Dean said, pleased with himself. He really liked when other people enjoyed his cooking, but Cas complimenting his skills turned out to be something else. Dean took a bite of his own burger, deciding it was quite nice indeed.

They were eating in comfortable silence, munching happily and sipping their coffees. Soon, Dean’s eyelids felt heavy, fatigue taking over, while Cas started yawning.

“I don’t know about you, but I'm in desperate need of a shower,” Cas said.

Dean suddenly vividly remembered Cas’s naked ass and thighs in Visby and cleared his throat. “Yeah… That’s probably a good idea. You go first, I’ll clean up here.”

“Are you sure? I can help you, it’ll be much faster-”

“No! No, no. Don’t worry. It’ll only be a moment,” he smiled awkwardly, rushing Cas out of the boat. 

Dean took his time cleaning the space and organizing his things in the kitchen. He had seen Cas going to the bathroom a while ago, so he decided it was safe to go too, since Cas should be locked inside of his cabin already. He collected his toiletries and a towel, directing his steps to the showers as well.

As he had predicted, Cas was still under the stream of water. Dean rushed to his cabin and locked it from the inside, deciding to stay there until Cas was dressed again. There was no need to repeat the Visby bathroom situation.

Dean was being absurd again, he knew it. He sighed and started to undress himself, then stepped under the shower. The warm water was blissfully massaging his neck and back, running down his spine. It was pleasant - so pleasant that he had to actually stop a moan forming in his throat. Suddenly, his brain supplied him with an image of Cas’s broad back and his stupidly toned butt back from Visby. He felt a spark of interest that sent a warm sensation through him, a feeling he hadn’t experienced in quite some time. And perhaps that was exactly the problem here - perhaps it had simply been too long…

Or perhaps, not at all.

Cas is standing naked under the shower next to mine, he thought, then shivered. His mouth parted, and he felt his heart rate rising. He glanced down - he was definitely aroused. He blinked a few times, his mind racing.

The problem was, that Dean had started to connect the dots earlier that day, the realization at the verge of his mind. His babbling, staring, and strange bodily reactions, all of this, really, could be justified. It was quite simple, even if unbelievable, taking all of Dean’s life into account. There was no doubt in his mind that Cas was a handsome man. Admiring him, however, was one thing. Sporting a boner because of said friend’s ass - no matter how well-defined - was another. He looked at the tiles in front of him and closed his eyes, finally admitting to himself what was really going on here. He took a deep breath, then another. This was bizarre. Here he was, standing under a shower on a tiny island in Denmark, at the age of 36, having a sexuality crisis. 

How is this even possible?

He washed himself, abandoning his dick for now - it could wait, besides he really was exhausted and didn’t have the mental capacity for dealing with that right now. Through the splash of water, he heard Cas stepping out of his shower.

“Dean, are you here?” Cas asked with his stupidly deep, velvety voice.

“Yeah,” Dean said weakly.

“Okay. I'm heading back. I need about four hours of sleep. Is that okay?” 

“Yeah.” 

“Are you alright? You sound strange.”

“I'm okay Cas. Go, we'll meet in a few.”

“Alright.”

He heard Cas opening and closing the bathroom door. He sighed again, turning the shower off. 

He was sure that hadn’t reacted like this when he had seen other men naked before, and he definitely liked women, considering his previous activities. Was it even possible to just not be aware of your sexual orientation for your whole life?

He finally stepped out of the cabin and dried himself, putting on some fresh underwear. He approached the mirror and looked at his tired eyes in the reflection. Denying his own feelings wouldn't change anything, he thought.

The bottom line was that Dean was undoubtedly - and quite hopelessly - attracted to Cas, and he had absolutely no idea what to do about it.

Chapter Text

Once he finally managed to stop freaking out, Dean opened the door of the bathroom and looked around. The harbor was small and old, and the buildings surrounding it were old as well. Long, narrow steel bridge between the two biggest islands reflected in the tiny bay below. There were no cars at all, and no roads, for that matter. It looked like the place was frozen in time.

He steered himself back to his boat. Sweet Magdalene’s doors were closed already, so he assumed Cas was trying to get some needed rest. He should probably do the same, but in the face of his new discovery, he had to seek some advice from someone more experienced in... well. Gay.

He went below the deck to leave his toiletries, then he took his phone and grabbed a towel on his way out, hanging it on the railing. He closed Baby’s door and stepped at the quay. He went in the general direction of the little town square, squeezing through the tables of a small restaurant. When he was far enough, he unlocked his phone and called Charlie.

“Ahoy, sailor!” She greeted him cheerfully.

“Hey,” he responded weakly.

“Oh dude, you sound terrible. What's wrong?” 

“Yeah. I'm tired, but that's not why I'm calling,” Dean hesitated, feeling his pulse rising. Was he really just gonna admit it out loud to another human being? It was scary as fuck. How did people even do it?

“Dean? Are you there?” Charlie asked.

He took a deep breath. He wasn't going to survive this without her.

“Yeah, just… I don't know how to say this. I uh… I need your help. I think I might have a crush. On - on a guy.”

“Whaaaaaaat??” She shouted. He was sure that people twenty meters away could hear her through the speaker.

“Oh my god, please don't scream…” Dean grimaced.

Charlie ignored him and continued to shout, clearly excited. “Dean, this is great, I'm so happy you finally realized you are attracted to men!”

“Wait, what do you mean finally-”

“Who is the lucky guy? Can I meet him?” 

“Meet him?” He repeated dumbly. ”I mean, he's asleep now-”

“Did you have sex already? You move so fast, dude-” 

Dean felt his head spinning. “Charlie! I'm begging you, stop. This is so not what’s going on. I'm serious, I need your help!” He hissed. Charlie went silent after that, allowing Dean to collect his thoughts. He looked around in panic, but nobody seemed to pay any attention to him. He took a deep breath again, trying to calm himself down. “Okay, so here’s the thing. A few days ago I sailed to this little city in Gotland and met a guy there. Cas is half Swedish, he lives there with his son and he is a sailor. I mean, he works as a skipper on the sailboats. He is really nice looking. Like, super handsome.” Dean felt his ears getting hot. ”And he’s funny and nice and uh…” Charlie squealed but didn’t interrupt him otherwise. ”Yeah, so, we met at the marina,” Dean decided to omit the part where he had ogled Cas’s rear in the bathroom like a total creep, Charlie didn't have to know that. “We ate dinner together and then talked a lot. I made him breakfast and he showed me around the city. And um. Then we parted and I was sure we wouldn’t see each other again, but tonight we met by accident in the friggin’ middle of the sea. And now I can’t seem to stop thinking about him. I really enjoy his company, Charles,” he ended weakly.

Charlie hummed, processing the information. “Where are you now?”

“We have just arrived at some tiny Danish archipelago. Cas is probably asleep by now, we sailed during the night.”

“How long are you going to see him?”

“He’s gonna sail out tomorrow morning.”

“Okay. And why are you panicking, exactly? It seems like you’ve got everything under control.”

Dean frowned. “Charlie! I don't know what to do! I have like zero idea how to behave. I’m not even sure what is happening, it’s the first time ever I find a guy this attractive.” Charlie huffed. “What is that supposed to mean?” Dean asked, frustrated.

“Dude, I was like 90 percent sure you were bi. The way you look at Harrison Ford in ‘Star Wars’ is not straight, that’s for sure. And you have a crush on Aragorn,” she listed. ”And don’t even get me started on the cowboys. Every time you see one there is no way to distract you with anything else.”

Well, if she put it like that… But wasn’t it normal for everybody? He was quite sure that the cowboys were just awesome. The lines on his forehead deepened.

“If you really suspected I’m not straight, why the hell didn’t you say something?”

“It's rude to assume someone else's sexual orientation. I was hoping you'd figure it out on your own eventually. And now look at you, with your very first real-life gay crush,” she said happily.

Dean closed his eyes. He had used to date many girls, back in the day. He had been quite popular, sure of his emotions and needs. It had been fun. This, however, wasn't fun, it was desperate and he felt miserable.

He sighed. “Charlie, I have no idea if he’s interested in me. He never mentioned his partner, as far as I know, he is just a straight dude. And even if he, well, were interested in guys, I don’t know if I’m his type! And even if I were - I have absolutely no idea what I’m doing. I’m like a gay virgin! Hell, I thought I was straight until last Thursday!”

“Okay, take a deep breath, Dean. This is not the end of the world, we’ve all been there. The guy seems to at least like you, so whatever you’re doing, just continue to do it until tomorrow.”

“I’m behaving like a moron and I stutter,” Dean admitted.

“Maybe he’s into this? I don’t know,” Charlie said calmly. Dean whined. "The important part is, you are fine. Just, be you, you’re charming and lovely when you want to be. His preferences will get clear, eventually.”

“Fuck, I really like spending time with him. I don’t want to, like, hit on him and make him uncomfortable. He’s smart and-and dorky, y’know? I’d love to stay in touch with him even if he’s not into me,” he whined again.

“Dean, just… don’t try to get him naked and you’re gonna be fine. Probably.” Dean gulped. “You didn’t scare him yet, so I’d say he’s gonna rather stick around,” she finished.

Well, Cas had contacted Dean first when he’d seen the Impala's signal tonight. If he hadn’t wanted to talk with Dean, he would have just sailed past him, unnoticed. He had seemed rather interested in Dean’s company, right?

“Yeah, okay. You might have a point.”

“Of course, I have a point, Winchester. Now, get some rest and update me tomorrow. It’s gonna be fine. Oh, and congratulations on officially joining the non-straight club!” She chirped.

Dean huffed. “I have a feeling you're going to throw a party now.”

“Well, duh! As soon as you come back. Which is… when exactly?”

“I’m not sure yet. I’ll let you know, Charles, I promise.”

“Can’t wait, I really miss you, dude.”

“Yeah, I miss you too. And, y’know, thanks for the talk. I needed it.” 

“Anytime, Dean.”

They exchanged goodbyes and Dean finally went back to Baby. He updated Bobby and Sam on his way, sending them his location. He suddenly realized he would have to come out to them too, eventually, which meant talking about feelings, and that was something Dean really, really didn’t want to do. He grimaced.

Below the deck, he sat on the bed and put his phone away. 

So, Charlie had suspected he was bisexual. Dean felt disoriented. How could he not have figured this out sooner? He scanned his memory, looking for any clues in his life that could lead him to the truth earlier. Charlie had been right about his interest in the actors and musicians, but the thing was, he'd thought he’d wanted to be like them, not with them. Now, he wasn’t so sure anymore.

What a mess.

He thought about his parents - what would they say? He was pretty sure John Winchester’s idea of a manly man had not included the bisexuality of his son. His mom, though, had seemed to be open to other people. It was possible she wouldn’t mind, as long as Dean was happy.

He eventually lay down, too tired to torture himself with his thoughts. He was so exhausted that he fell asleep almost instantly.

+

About four hours later, Dean sat on his couch with a fresh cup of coffee, reading some articles online that could help him with the newly formed crisis. He felt a little bit better than before, though still confused. He had discovered that bisexual people could be attracted stronger towards one gender over another and that was clearly the case here, since he was positive he generally found women more attractive.

Well, most of them, anyway. Cas was a different story.

When he really started thinking about it, he realized that he had thought about men that way before, and not only fictional characters or musicians, for that matter. He could bring a few examples of hot dudes from the school he had gone to, and he was positive that Benny was a handsome guy. It wasn't like he would act on it - the dude was stupidly happy with Andrea, but Dean definitely felt some attraction towards him.

He had also discovered it was completely understandable he felt attracted to Cas in such a strong way, but hadn’t experienced this feeling towards other men before. He started suspecting Cas could be one of a kind, at least for him.

Dean finished his coffee and stood up. Sexually confused or not, he still wanted to spend some time with Cas, even if the guy was, in fact, a source of his crisis. They had only a few hours left together, after all.

The sound of a ringtone stopped him in his tracks. He glanced at the screen of his phone. 

He picked it up. “Hey, Benny!”

“Hello, cher. You still kickin'?”

“Yeah. That postcard should reach you soon, man.”

Benny chuckled. “Appreciate it. Listen, you wanted to know when something went south. We've got a situation. Apparently, our 49-foot sloop, which we launched a year ago, has got a defect. Something's leakin’. Three different owners reported water in the bilge and I have a hunch that by the end of the month, there’ll be more. Your brother didn’t freak out yet, but I can say he’s not sure what to do.”

Dean frowned. He remembered creating the plans for this particular boat. If he wasn’t mistaken, they had changed a supplier of their rubber seals around that time, which could be a crucial information here, since the seals were always a possible source of leaks. Even if it wasn't a serious problem yet, it could certainly lead to one.

It would be really stupid and selfish of him to continue his vacation like nothing had happened.

“Good thinkin’. Thanks, Benny, I really appreciate it. Sam didn’t tell me anything. I guess it’s time for me to sail back, huh?”

“I’ve got it covered for now, so don’t panic Dean. We’ll survive without you for a little bit longer.”

“Yeah, okay. Just keep me updated if you find anything. We need to locate the source of the leaks. I’d start with checking the rubber seals, but you probably know that.”

“Sure do, brother. Apart from that, you good?”

“As good as I can be. It’s beautiful out here, y’know?”

“I can imagine. Maybe I should visit the North too? I’ll have to ask my lady.”

“Yeah, you should definitely check it out.”

Dean finished the conversation soon after. It really looked like he would have to start sailing back home, but planning could wait a few more hours. His time with Cas was very limited and he was determined to hang out with the guy as long as possible. He also had to think of some way for them to keep in touch. They would obviously exchange their numbers, but Dean wanted to make sure they would actually see each other, preferably in the not-too-distant future. He bit his lower lip, thinking. Was it okay if he just invited Cas to visit him? It sounded quite reasonable, he thought. After all, Cas could just decline if he didn't want to go.

Satisfied with his idea, Dean stepped on the deck. The sun was super bright, and the day was humid and hot. He looked around, then went back and took his sunglasses, locking Baby’s doors behind him. He carefully stepped on Sweet Magdalene’s deck and knocked on Cas’s door.

“Come in,” a weak sound came from the inside. Dean grinned, then opened the door and entered through the companionway. Cas was sitting on the couch with bags under his eyes and a cup of coffee clutched between his fingers, his hair in a total mess. He clearly needed more rest.

“Hey. How was your beauty sleep?” Dean asked. Cas only glared at him, then dove into the mug with streaming fluid. “Grumpy, aren't you?”

Cas rolled his eyes. He looked like an irritated owl now, Dean thought. Very handsome, irritated owl.

“Don't be an ass, Dean. You look terrible yourself,” he grumbled.

“Wow, okay,” Dean chuckled nervously. Cas clearly wasn't ready for any conversation. “I didn’t mean it like that, you just look tired, that’s all.”

Cas closed his eyes and sighed, then looked at Dean again. His eyes were a little red, hair sticking in every direction.

“I’m sorry. I am tired and you did nothing wrong. And you don’t look terrible,” he said remorsefully. His mouth tightened into a thin line now. 

“It’s okay, I get it, I feel like shit myself,” Dean answered. “Are we still doing the sightseeing? We could just go back to sleep.”

“I’d very much like to take you on a walk. Could you give me a few minutes to adjust?” Cas asked, looking sheepish now. 

“Sure.” 

He’d very much take me on a walk, huh? 

Dean sat down on the couch across from Cas, who went back to inhaling his coffee, or possibly absorbing it through his pores - Dean wasn’t sure. He studied Cas’s messy hair for a moment. Had it been intentional to phrase it like a date or had Cas just been nice? Was it a clue? He was bi for only a few hours and already sucked at it. Dean suddenly felt paranoid and decided to focus on something else. He looked around. The boat was modern, with light wood and laminate everywhere. There was no navigation station, which Dean absolutely hated in newer sailboats. In his designs, he always added this important detail.

A happy ringtone filled the space between them. Cas took the phone out of his pocket and put it on the table, swiping it to answer the call.

“Hello, Jack. I’m with a friend and you’re on speaker,” he said with a soft expression and a small smile formed on his lips.

“Hello, Dad! Are you with Dean?”

Dean straightened in his seat. Cas had told his son about him? “Hiya, kid. That would be me. Nice to meet you,” he said.

“Oh, I was looking forward to speaking with you. Did you enjoy the seals?” Jack chirped through the phone, clearly excited.

The kid loved the animals, right.

“Yeah, they were awesome. I totally think you should come here sometime, with your Dad, and see them by yourself.” Dean glanced at Cas and winked. Cas smiled wider in response, his grumpiness completely gone now.

“Gosh, I really should, I would love to see them from up close. Have you ever seen a seal before Dean?” Jack asked.

“Actually, when I was sailing to Visby through the mist, I saw a gray tail. I’m pretty sure it was a seal, but you know, it could also be-”

“A mermaid!” Jack shouted and gasped. Then he added, “but it could be a seal, you can never be sure.”

Dean chuckled.

“How are you, Jack? What did you do today?” Cas interjected.

“Grandma made a stew, but it wasn’t very good. I didn’t tell her that though, I didn’t want to hurt her feelings. We went to a shop afterward and when we got back, I watched some movies. When will you get back home?”

Cas’s smile turned a little sad. “I’ll be there as soon as possible, you know that. I need a few more days. We’ll see each other on Saturday,” he said.

After that, Jack started to explain to Cas a complicated plot of a story he had read, and his dad listened with interest. Dean observed their interaction with mixed feelings. They clearly had a deep bond and Cas loved his son to death, which was incredibly endearing. He was also visibly disturbed that he couldn't be with Jack, which broke Dean's heart a little.

Dean contemplated inviting them to Porto during the call, but he decided it wasn't such a good idea. He had to ask Cas first and give him some time to decide if he even wanted to take his son on a trip to Portugal.

“Alright, Jack. Me and Dean are going to look for some more seals. I promise I'll take a picture if I see one,” Cas said in his deep voice.

“Okay. Please do, Dad. And Dean, if you find another mermaid, could you take a picture as well?”

“Sure, buddy.” Dean smiled. Jack sounded like a nice kid. 

“Okay. I love you, Dad. Bye!”

“I love you too, Jack.”

Castiel disconnected the call and put the phone back into his pocket. He looked warmly at Dean. “Thank you for being so kind to him.”

“Why wouldn't I be? He's really cool.” Cas only smiled in response. It was ridiculous how this smile made Dean feel. He felt a blush creeping on his cheeks, and a warm feeling spreading in his guts. He looked at the floor, feeling Cas’s eyes on him.

“I think I'm ready for a walk now. Let me just get my hat,” Cas said after a moment, standing up. Dean mentally grunted. 

A cowboy hat torture. 

“I'll wait for you at the quay, then,” Dean said, his voice a little high, and stood up as well, stepping out of the boat.

He took a deep breath.

Calm down. Just don’t try to get him naked. 

Why would I, wouldn’t even know what to do with him naked. 

Dean frowned. That was undoubtedly a subject he should explore in the near future. But not with Cas.

Yet, his brain supplied. He groaned, frustrated at himself. 

Later. Let's think about it later. 

He resumed walking. He double-checked Baby’s door on his way to the dock, just to be sure it was closed, then stepped onto the gray concrete and turned around, crossing his arms on his chest.

He saw Cas’s cowboy hat first, then the whole guy reemerging from under his deck. They guy closed the door after himself and stepped through the boats, finally standing next to Dean.

Yeah, cowboy hat torture, alright. 

“Let's start with the lighthouse. Shall we?” Cas asked, oblivious to Dean’s internal struggles.

They directed their steps to the stairs nearby and started climbing. The sky was cloudless and bright. Dean put his sunglasses on and glanced at Cas. The guy had a light blue T-shirt on with the little bee in the middle, and a slogan ‘Bee yourself’ under it.

“Earlier you said you would go back home on Saturday?” Dean asked a moment later.

“Ah, yes. That's the plan. I need to deliver the boat to Germany and then I'll come back home. I should be able to catch a plane from Berlin.”

They entered a path made of gravel, the white building of a lighthouse visible to their left.

“And uh... Is that how you usually work? I mean a week at the sea with a few days off in between?"

“Yes. Next Tuesday I'm sailing with a crew to Copenhagen and back.” Cas fell silent for a moment, then continued. “June, July, and August are always busy for me. I’m rarely at home and it’s quite difficult for Jack. And for me too,” he admitted, then glanced at Dean, his gaze intense. “Why do you ask?”

Okay, here we go. 

“I was just wondering, y’know, and it's completely fine if you don't want to since we know each other only for a few days… but uh... Would you - would you like to visit Porto? Maybe? With Jack?”

Dean was truly a king of fucking words when he was nervous, wasn’t he?

Cas’s eyes widened in surprise, and his lips parted. He stopped walking, forcing Dean to do the same. 

“You don't have to answer right away if you need some time to decide. I know you probably want to discuss it with Jack and I totally understand if you guys decide not to go-” Dean started to panic when Cas stayed silent for too long.

“No no, Dean, wait,” Cas interrupted him. ”I'd love to go and I'm almost sure Jack would, too. I was just surprised you wanted us to visit you.” A shy smile bloomed on Cas's face. “Are you sure?” 

Dean frowned. “What? Why wouldn’t I be?”

“Well, as you said, we don’t really know each other for that long, and you didn’t even meet my son in person.”

“If you visit me, I will, won’t I?” Said Dean, raising his brow. “Will you be able to get some time off?”

Cas cocked his head, thinking. “Well… yes. Um, I think I should be free around the last week of August and the first two weeks of September.”

“That's great!” Dean felt the wave of relief inside of him, then a buzz of excitement. Cas wanted to come and see him again. Three weeks together meant he could take them to all of the nice places he knew. Maybe they could even squeeze some sailing on Baby together? He would have to check to be sure, but there should be a race around that time. Would Cas want to do a race with him, though? He’d have to ask him later. Maybe they could take Jack with them, show him that sailing can be fun…

“Could you recommend any nice hotels for us?”

“Huh?” Dean asked dumbly, snapped out of his thoughts. He quickly pulled himself together. He had somehow assumed there was no other way for Cas and Jack than to simply stay in his apartment, forgetting about the existence of the hotels altogether. “Oh. Sure, I could send you some good ones, but um. You can totally stay at my place. If you'd like, obviously. My apartment is quite spacious, I have a spare bedroom. But again, I totally understand if you want to stay at the hotel,” he finished weakly, looking at his friend’s face.

Cas’s mouth parted, like he wanted to say something, but decided against it. Dean could swear that after the guy broke eye contact and before he looked at the ground, he stopped at Dean’s lips for a split second.

Cas stayed silent for a moment, then raised his eyes at Dean again. “Dean, I need you to understand that I will be traveling with an energetic, loud, and sometimes just raising havoc kid, fed mostly with sugar. Are you sure you want to offer your apartment, of all places, to us, for a whole week?”

“Wait, why only a week? You said about three just a moment ago. And you described Jack like he had rabies or something,” Dean said, furrowing his brows.

Cas, on the other hand, looked at Dean in disbelief, then squinted his eyes. Finally, he started laughing, his shoulders shaking.

“Dean, I thought you would choose one of the three weeks, not invite us for almost a month to crowd you.”

“You wouldn't crowd me!” Dean protested.

“Okay, just - take your time and think about it. We don’t have to decide right away and I won’t plan anything else during those weeks. Is that okay?”

Dean had no choice but to nod. Cas smiled and resumed walking, Dean following shortly after.

Maybe he had pushed Cas too far this time. Had he crossed a line? The guy looked cool as a cucumber, but Dean had noticed Cas was generally a composed guy. It was hard to figure out what he was thinking.

Castiel told him a little bit about the history of the Christiansø island, which was actually the largest of the small archipelago. The land was rocky, full of wild plants and old-looking houses. At the east end of the island, they discovered more seals and Cas took some pictures for Jack. He still had his cowboy hat on, looking stupidly handsome. When he finished documenting the fauna, he turned his head towards Dean, smiling shyly. 

“Would you mind if we took a picture together?”

Dean had actually planned to ask the same questuin and he was glad that he didn’t have to. He still felt he had overdone it when he had assumed that Cas and Jack would stay in his apartment for three weeks, so he was reluctant to push the boundaries again. “No, that would be great, actually,” he finally said.

They stood close to each other so they would fit in the picture, the sea at their back. Dean took his glasses off and looked at Cas’s camera in his extended hand. Cas smelled like the air after a storm and a tint of fresh sea breeze. It was as calming as it was addictive. Dean had to remind himself they were in the process of posing for a photograph, so he forced himself to focus on his facial expressions instead of Cas’s smell and body heat. They both smiled and Cas took a photo, showing it to Dean after. He couldn’t remember seeing himself this happy in a picture. Cas, on the other hand, looked like a wet dream - tanned and muscular, with his cowboy hat on and eyes bluer than the sky above them.

“We should exchange phone numbers. Give me yours, Dean, I’ll send the photo to you,” said Cas, handing Dean his cell. Dean pushed the numbers, saving himself as ‘Dean’ in Cas’s contact. After a moment of consideration, he added his email address too. Then, he called himself to check if he had put the digits in the correct order and to save Cas’s number on his phone at the same time.

“Okay, got it. Do you use WhatsApp, Cas? You can send the picture there.” Cas nodded, but Dean suddenly remembered that the app converted the files and they ended up in low quality. ”Actually, could you send it via email?”

“As you wish, Dean,” Cas smiled, opening his email app. After a moment, Dean heard a ping of his phone. 

They resumed walking. The island was peaceful, waves audible in the distance. Dean enjoyed the sun on his face and arms. It was hot, but Portugal this time of the year was hotter, so the weather in Christiansø was a welcomed change.

Somewhere in the middle of the island, Dean saw a house with a pride flag raised on a high pole. He suddenly realized it was his flag too, now. Would he ever be brave enough to do something like this himself and just announce to everybody he wasn't exactly straight? He glanced at Cas, looking for any reaction on his face, but the guy didn’t seem to notice the flag at all.

“What does your company do?” Asked Cas after a moment of walking. They moved now to the other side of the island, directing their steps to the little bridge that connected Christiansø with the much smaller island Frederiksø.

“We are building sailboats,” Dean said, deciding that Cas would discover this sooner or later, anyway.

His friend looked at him, impressed. “Now I understand why your boat looks this good. You had a lot of practice.”

Dean smirked. “She’s one of a kind, trust me.”

“Yes, I’m starting to realize that.”

On the other side of the bridge, they found a table with trinkets to buy. Dean saw colorful, handmade keychains that looked like buoys, and he bought two, giving the yellow one to Castiel. He thanked Dean, surprised, and smiled, putting the keychain inside the pocket in his trousers. Dean immediately put Baby’s keys on his new, orange one. 

They looked for more seals for a while longer, but they sadly found none. The wind was pleasantly cooling Dean’s arms and face.

“Which one of your siblings do you like best?” Asked Dean as they reached the rocky end of the other island.

“Gabriel,” Said Cas almost immediately. ”He's a little bit older than me, and really annoys me sometimes. I can’t even tell you why I like him.”

Dean chuckled. “I get it, Sammy is annoying too, although I am the older one. I have no idea why I'm hanging out with him.”

“Do you see your brother often?” Asked Cas after a moment.

“Well, I do see him at work, but there is not really much time for talkin there, y’know? But we visit each other and eat dinner together once a week. I try to be a good uncle and brother-in-law, I guess. I try to spend time with his kids if I can. 

“How old are they?” Cas asked, smiling softly.

“Um, 3 and 5,” Dean said, kicking a small stone. “And my sister-in-law sometimes makes a homemade pie, so I keep coming back,” he added, grinning.

“A pie, you say?” Cas cocked his head. 

“Yep. The queen of all the pastries, my friend.”

Cas chuckled and nodded, his blue eyes full of mirth.

The sun started to slowly reach the line of the horizon. Small clouds formed over their heads when they walked back to their boats.

Cas offered to make dinner this time and Dean decided to find some snacks for a movie night in the meantime. There was exactly one shop on the island, and it was closing soon, so Dean rushed there. Once he bought every vegan thing he could find, he went back to his boat and cleaned up a little, preparing for his guest. Cas showed up with two plates while Dean was opening ‘The Fellowship of the Ring’ on his laptop. They sat beside each other with their meal in their hands - Cas had made a tasty pasta with tomatoes and herbs. 

“Okay, you need to focus, Cas. This movie is a life changer,” Dean said seriously.

“Alright,” Cas said amused, his eyes gleaming.

“I mean it. I’m gonna ask questions later and you’d better know the answers.”

Dean then started the movie and kept glancing at Cas, making sure he was paying attention. After a few minutes, Cas shot him an irritated look in response, but soon both of them focused on the plot.

Cas was clearly invested in the movie, as he should be.

Some time after Gandalf had fallen in Moria, Dean felt a weight on his left shoulder. He glanced at Cas, now peacefully asleep, with his dark, messy hair and the softness on his face. A warm feeling spread over Dean’s body.

So here was the thing - Dean usually needed a lot of time to trust somebody enough to even like them. This, however, didn’t seem to be true when it came to Cas. It was risky, to feel so safe around a guy he hardly knew, but Dean couldn’t seem to help it. And if he were honest with himself, he didn’t really want to change a thing.

Cas was so close to him now, that he could clearly sense his stormy scent. Dean felt like he was floating in the safe vastness of the ocean, the waves rocking him gently. His breath soon evened and he drifted to peaceful sleep.

+

The first thing he noticed was the smell of brewing coffee. Then, he felt the softness of a blanket on his arms and a pillow under his head. It was blissful and Dean's muscles were relaxed. He really didn’t want to open his eyes yet. Suddenly, he remembered that last night Cas had dozed off on his shoulder. His eyes snapped open and he sat up in one swift movement.

He was lying on the couch where they had watched a movie yesterday, wrapped in some foreign-looking blanket. The pillow he had under his head was not his, either. He slowly blinked, looking around. 

“Hello, Dean,” a deep voice rumbled behind him. “I believe I unintentionally used you as a pillow yesterday.” Dean turned around and saw Cas standing in his kitchen space, two steaming mugs of coffee in his hands. “I am sorry for the inconvenience, however, I would like to inform you that you were extremely comfortable to sleep on.”

Dean snorted. “Happy to hear it, man. I didn’t mind, you were exhausted. And so was I, for that matter. What’s the time?”

“It’s shortly after 6 in the morning. I’m afraid I need to sail out soon.” Cas handed Dean one of the mugs, which Dean gladly accepted. “When I woke up, you seemed to be a little cold, so I took my blanket and a pillow from Sweet Magdalene. I didn’t want to rummage through your stuff. I hope you don’t mind.”

Dean didn’t mind at all. It smelled like Cas and Dean found himself drawn to this particular aroma. He shook his head, taking a sip of his coffee. Cas placed himself on the other side of the table. They sat in silence for a moment, enjoying their drinks.

“Where will you sail now, Dean?”

“I’m actually needed back home, so I should probably start heading back. I need to check the weather forecast and figure out the fastest way, I guess.” 

Cas nodded. “I’m afraid it’s going to rain today. Could you give me an update when you arrive at the next harbor?”

“Yeah, sure, as long as you will do the same.” Their eyes met again. Eventually, Dean cleared his throat and looked away.

A moment later, when their mugs were empty, Castiel stood up from his seat and Dean did the same. He gave Cas his blanket and a pillow back - he would gladly steal them, but the guy needed to sleep on something. They went outside and stopped on the deck. Sweet Magdalene's lines were ready and she was prepared to sail out - Cas probably had done it before Dean had woken up.

His friend went below the deck and emerged shortly afterward, wearing his hat and a life jacket. Dean absolutely hated the idea they had to part. He felt like a Spanish lady from the song, left on the shore by a handsome sailor. Cas was a handsome sailor, so at least this part was true.

“Dean.” He was yet again snapped out of his thoughts by Cas’s stupid, deep voice. The guy was standing on the Impala’s deck again, not caring about Dean's personal space. Dean looked up at Cas’s ocean eyes. “I’d like to buy you a pie, sometime,” Cas said. 

Dean felt his cheeks turning red again. Damn that guy. He chuckled, looking at his feet, then back up. 

“I’d like that too, Cas,” he admitted, smiling.

And then, Dean was squeezed by big, warm arms, his chest pressed hard against Cas’s. He hugged Cas the same way, taking in his warmth and scent, engraving them in his memory.

They stood like this for too long, Cas’s presence filling his senses. It was possibly the best hug of Dean’s entire life.

Cas eventually took a step back, smiled again, and went back on his boat, turning the engine on. Dean helped him with the lines. Once Sweet Magdalene’s stern pointed at the sea, Dean threw the spring line on her deck. Cas turned his head to look at Dean again and waved one last time, a smile flickered across his face. He watched Cas leave the harbor until he could see him no more.

Dean felt sadness overcoming him already.

Chapter Text

The clouds began to multiply indicating the change of weather. Dean studied the sky for a moment, then went back below Impala’s deck and cleaned up after the movie night. He felt drained of energy and gloomy, even though this time he was almost sure he would see Cas again, probably in the next few weeks.

He pulled out his phone and checked the weather forecast, then moved to his navigation station. He searched for the nautical charts of the waters surrounding Denmark, then spread them on the table. He had to get back to Porto as quickly as possible. Benny was right, the same defect on several boats meant all of them could be flawed, and that would be a serious matter for the entire company.

Dean focused on his possible next move. He should sail west, preferably to Kiel, but the wind was blowing from exactly that direction. He would have to go upwind and tack, which meant the journey would be longer and more tiring. Additionally, the forecast suggested quite heavy weather - it would be gusting 30 knots plus, so Dean would have to stay on his toes. He studied the charts and different weather apps, considering his options, and finally coming to a decision. Sailing alone in those conditions for longer than twelve hours would be extreme, so Dean assumed sailing to Ystad first was his best bet. He could check the weather forecast again in the morning. The Baltic Sea had turned out to be quite unpredictable and he wanted to be sure there was no storm forming on his route before he found himself in the middle of it. 

On top of all that, if he wanted to reach Portugal fast, he would eventually need some assistance. He unlocked the screen of his phone and searched for Bobby’s name, tapping on it. It was about time to ask his dad for help. 

“Yeah?” A gruff voice welcomed him.

“Hi, Bobby. Do you have a minute?”

“Yeah, shoot.”

“I’m in Christiansø, the weather is about to turn to shit, but I’m okay. Benny just gave me a heads up, there seems to be a problem with leaking in several vessels. I think I should head back. Are you still up for sailing with me?”

“Nothing’s changed, boy. Just tell me when and where to show up and I’ll be there.”

“Great. I’m thinking about sailing through the Kiel Canal, but there is a regulation that says I need to cross it by day. If everything goes well, I should show up in Cuxhaven on 17th June in the evening. How does it sound?”

“Cux- where? Give me a moment, Dean, I don’t know where that is.”

Considering the noises, Dean assumed Bobby moved from one room to another and then opened a laptop. He cursed a few times because he forgot his password again, but finally managed to find Cuxhaven on the map. 

“Okay, it’s doable. I’ll be there on the 18th. I need to fly to Hamburg from here, it’s the closest city with an airport,” Bobby said after a moment of searching different websites.

“Bobby, to be honest, we can choose any place you like. It doesn’t have to be this one.”

“Boy, don’t you even start. I’d be damned if I left you when you clearly need some help. And I ain’t going back until we figure out what is wrong with the damn leaking boats either.”

Dean smiled. “Okay. I'm not gonna argue with you on that. So it’s settled then?”

“Damn straight.”

“Great. And Bobby, don’t tell Sam I know about the leaks. The kid probably wants to handle it himself, but it could get nasty pretty fast.”

“I hear ya.”

Dean finished the conversation soon after. With Bobby’s help, they could double the time of sailing, since they would switch on steering Baby. Satisfied with the new plan, Dean decided to prepare himself a breakfast. He still had few eggs left - they were not vegan, so he hadn't eaten them with Cas. He whisked them in a bowl, adding salt and pepper. Scrambled eggs were fast and easy to do and he was in no mood to cook anything more complicated.

Once he ate, he sent a quick message to Sam and Charlie informing them he would call later. He should reach Ystad in 9 hours or less. Then, Dean put on some more layers of clothing and hung his waterproof jacket and trousers within reach - it didn’t rain yet, but it was going to start pretty soon.

He went to the deck to prepare Baby to cast off.

+

Three hours later Dean had all of his waterproof sailing gear on and the sails fully reefed. It was blowing 25 knots of steady wind and gusted even to 35 knots. And boy oh boy, was it raining.

Sailing in the rain was nothing new to Dean, but it sure as fuck wasn’t pleasant. He remembered a time when Bobby had taken him on his yawl to New Haven and the weather had gone bad on their way back. Bobby had made him very sweet tea, to keep Dean warm, and had let him eat a whole chocolate. To that day Dean remembered the sweetness of the melting sugar on his tongue.

The wave hit him in the face, interrupting his walk down memory lane. Close-hauled sailing always meant the biggest waves and plenty of water on the deck. The rain kept pouring down mercilessly, soaking everything that hadn't been soaked yet. Dean had pretty good gear for this kind of weather, but even with everything on, he still felt a little cold. Fortunately, he had some tea left in his travel mug, which he had placed in the special holder in the cockpit and sipped every now and then.

He wondered if Cas had to sail through the rain as well. He hadn't specified to which German city he needed to deliver Sweet Magdalene, but it was possible the rain clouds didn’t reach him.

With nothing else to do, Dean’s mind wandered to the events of the last day. He wasn’t any closer to discovering Cas’s sexuality - the guy had been extremely polite and hadn't let any unintended emotions show on his face. Dean, on the other hand, was sure his facial expressions had shown absolutely everything he had felt. He had always blushed and flustered easily and additionally, while he had been with Cas, he had seriously struggled to stay cool and collected. Then again, he was completely new to being consciously interested in the same sex, so the most prominent feeling from yesterday had been probably confusion. 

Even in all the chaos, Dean had found it incredibly easy to talk to Cas, almost as if they had known each other their whole lives.

He also wondered what to tell his brother and Bobby, if he should tell them anything at all, at least for now. He realized that meeting a guy in Sweden and simping over his thighs and shoulders wasn’t the ideal setting for the big revelation, especially if he had spent with the said guy only a day and a half combined. There was also a good chance Cas was straight, which only made everything more complicated. How would it even sound?

I’ve met a possibly straight dude and saw his naked ass and now I am bisexual. 

Actually, when he thought about it, it didn’t sound bad at all. Cas’s ass was a good reason to realize that he was bisexual, Dean decided. Another wave hit him in the face. He spit the salty water from his mouth.

There was also a matter of any possible, future sexual activities Dean may or may not want to participate in, involving other dudes - preferably Castiel, if this particular dude wouldn't turn out straight. Or taken. Dean felt a little scared thinking about himself during possible sex with another man, but if other people found it pleasurable, there was no reason Dean wouldn’t, too. Obviously, having a partner with a penis, when he had one himself, meant he could bring pleasure to another person the same way he liked to be pleasured, so at least he wasn’t completely in the woods here. His mind chose this exact moment to deliver him a vivid image of Cas’s broad back, with his huge tattoo of the wings. He suddenly really wanted to touch it, tracing the lines of feathers with his fingers. Damn, why Cas had to be so good looking? He took a deep breath, calming himself down.

If he ever wanted to even consider gay sex, he first had to educate himself. The easiest way to learn about different things he could do was probably through the internet, although he wasn’t sure porn was the best source of knowledge. Maybe he could start with reading about this kind of activities instead of watching other people stick their dicks in different places? He felt a flush creeping into his face.

But I should watch porn too, just in case. For educational reasons. 

Satisfied with his logic, Dean glanced at the chartplotter, which was now covered in huge droplets of water. The traffic wasn’t bad, but Dean would have to maneuver between big cargo ships in a few minutes. He tried to focus on the route and banish the thoughts of Cas’s back out of his head. He was pretty sure it wasn’t elegant to think sexy thoughts about a possibly straight dude he had technically just met, but he couldn’t seem to help it. 

+

Dean reached the harbor in Ystad at 4 in the afternoon, docking safely between other vessels, his stern plastered to the quay. During the last hour and a half, he had started to feel really unpleasant and cold thanks to the non-stopping rain pouring on his head. Baby’s compartment and half of the corridor were wet and he needed to dry them thoroughly before sailing out. He should also dry his jacket and trousers before departing, since everything was almost completely soaked. He had to double-check the weather forecast though, there was no need for him to stand in the rain for several hours again.

He stripped off the wet gear and hung it on the hooks inside of the boat. The hot shower sounded amazing, but he had to pay the fees and get accesses to the bathroom and electricity first. Once he filled the logbook, Dean took his spare waterproof jacket and put it on, collecting his phone and documents from under the table of the navigation station.

The marina in Ystad was spacious and the guy in the harbormaster office seemed nice. After Dean took care of the payment, he went back to Baby, then grabbed all of his toiletries and a towel and rushed onto the quay, searching for the shower sign. When he entered the room, nobody was using any of the stalls inside. He stripped down and went under the stream of hot water.

Dean felt his muscles relaxing and the coldness slowly disappearing from his body. He closed his eyes, letting the water overwhelm his senses. His mind went blank. For a blissful moment, Dean didn’t think about anything. After a while, however, he found himself assaulted by the vision of Cas’s naked body again.

No. Nono no. You will not jerk off to him. 

Dean decided to stay civilized and imagined a hot lady instead. Yes, a blonde lady with boobs, under the shower with him. He felt his dick getting interested in the fantasy. He took himself in his hand and started stroking with lazy movements. He put one hand on the tiles in front of him, pleasure slowly building in his abdomen. He started panting. Suddenly, the blue eyes and messy, dark hair flashed in his mind. Dean moaned. 

Shit. Stop it. Boobs. 

With each stroke, it became harder and harder to keep Cas's image out of his mind, but Dean was determined to not be a creep again. It was frustrating and he had to battle his brain a few more times before he finally managed to come.

+

He went back to the Impala and decided to clean up the water that spilled inside during the rain. He did quick work with the spare rags and a bucket, drying everything as thoroughly as he could. It was still raining, but not as hard as before. He sat down by the table, collecting his thoughts. He had to stock up the food for the next few days and tank the fuel and water. First, though, he had to finally contact Sam and Charlie. He reached for his phone, which luckily didn’t get wet during the passage, then dialed the number.

“Look who’s alive,” he heard his brother’s voice a moment later.

“Hello to you too, Sammy. How’s Eileen?”

“Still beautiful and smart and unwilling to leave me for you,” Sam replied

“She’s breaking my heart, man!” Dean smiled. “And how’s the kid number one and the kid number two?”

His little brother had this idiotic idea to call his firstborn son Dean too. It had been confusing, to say the least, especially during family meetings. Dean had started to name Dean Junior ‘DJ’, which Sam had absolutely hated, but had had to accept since everybody - even his wife - called the kid DJ now too. The second one - Mary - they had named after their late mother, which was really sweet, but Dean was scared that Sam would continue this trend with the third baby and call it John.

Sam huffed. “Loud, mostly. They developed a new obsession with a kid’s movie. Something about cats? Or dogs, I’m not sure.”

“You’re such an asshole, dude,” Dean said with a grimace. He had always enjoyed spending time with Sam’s kids. They were funny, and he could watch some cartoons with them - especially Scooby-Doo marathons.

“Shut up, Dean. I’m awaiting the day you’ll have your own kids, then we’ll talk. How’s the trip? How’s Baby doing?”

“Currently super wet, but otherwise she’s good. We’ve just encountered heavy rain. And I guess it’s your lucky day, 'cause I’m heading back home. Bobby’s gonna join me in a few days and he’ll stay in Porto for a while.”

“Dean, that’s great! We haven’t seen him since Easter. Kid’s gonna love it,” Sam said, excited.

“Yeah, I bet.”

“I’m really glad you’re coming back. So um…” started Sam cautiously. “How are things, Dean?”

Dean knew that Sam wasn't asking about the beautiful landscapes he had seen during his trip. The whole point of this sailing experience had been for Dean to clear his mind and feel like himself again, but as he had recently discovered, he hadn’t even fully grasped who he was. Maybe he never really even had a chance to feel like himself? Maybe the cage he had been so desperately trying to escape, had been traveling with him all of this time? That would certainly explain the urge to constantly move around, but never really shaking off the feeling of being trapped.

“I’m sorting some things out, Sammy. I’m going to be fine,” Dean finally said. He wasn’t going to come out to his brother over the phone, but he could at least assure Sam that he wasn't falling apart.

Sam must’ve heard in his voice that this is not the time to push him for any details.

“That’s… that’s good to hear. I’m just worried, Dean.”

“Yeah, I know. You’re constantly worried about me, man. But I’m better, I think.”

The truth was, Dean didn’t know if his solitude journey had resolved anything, but he was sure as hell that meeting Cas had changed things. It felt like the door to the cage he was sitting inside of was finally cracked open.

“Okay. I’m glad Bobby’s joining you. Do you know how long it will take for you to get here?”

“With Bobby’s help, we'll be able to double the daily distance, but it still depends on the weather. I’ll keep you updated, Sam.”

“Great. Be safe out there.”

“Yeah, I will. Say ‘hi’ to Eileen and the kids.”

Dean hung up and put the phone on the table, running his hand over his face. He suddenly felt really tired. What if he just lay down for a minute or two? He shook his head. He needed to sail out tomorrow morning if he wanted to reach Cuxhaven on time. He stood up and started looking for some reusable shopping bags.

+

“So? How was it?” Charlie didn’t even greet him, cutting straight to the point. Dean snorted. She called him while he was going back to the Impala with all of the groceries.

“I survived. Cas did too. He doesn’t hate me, I think. I invited him and his son to Porto. And I didn’t get him naked, as you advised.”

At least not in real life, that is. 

“I’m so proud of you, Winchester. You did it like a pro!” Charlie praised him. “So when will this cutie visit us? And when will you come back, Dean?”

“Yeah, about that, I’m actually heading home. And Cas should visit us in a few weeks,” he answered, but suddenly became worried. ”Charlie, I’m begging you, don’t tell anyone anything until I’m there. Especially Sam. All of this is… it’s almost too much. I need some time to think.”

“First of all - yay! I can’t wait for you to come back, dude. And second of all, don't worry, bro, I’ve got you covered. I’d never blab about something so important. But there will be a price for my silence.”

Dean groaned. Of course, there would be a price, it was Charlie.

“What do you want, more Swedish sweets?”

“Oh no no no my friend. This is a serious matter. I demand to see Cas’s face.”

Dean considered her request for a moment. It wasn’t that bad, he had planned to show her the photo of the two of them anyway. He wanted to know her opinion on whether Cas was really that hot or Dean was just that hopeless.

“Okay, I’ll send it to you when I get back on the boat.” His attention was caught by a book on display at the local bookstore he was just passing by. He stopped by the entrance. “Listen, uh… I need to go.”

“Alright! But I request my picture, Dean.”

“Yeah, I know. I swear I’ll send it to you.”

“Okay, I’m waiting! Byeee.”

He disconnected the call, hid the phone in his pocket, and entered the bookstore with a small grin formed on his face.

+

Dean glanced at the watch - it was almost midnight. He should really get some rest before tomorrow. He closed ‘The Odyssey’, put the book on the table, and lay down on the bed again, looking at the laminate above him. He reached for his phone and opened his message thread with Charlie, where he’d sent her a few hours prior a picture of him and Cas from Christiansø. 

“He’s dreamy, Dean,” she had written. Dean couldn't help but agree with her. He opened the picture again, zooming on Cas’s face. It should be illegal to be this good-looking.

Suddenly, his phone vibrated, indicating the new message. This time it was from Cas. Dean felt his pulse rising.

“I’ve just arrived. I hate sailing in the rain. How are you, Dean?”

He read the message a few times and smiled, typing his response.

“Damn, I hoped you didn’t have to sail through the rain as well. I’m in Ystad. How about you?”

He saw Cas begin to type, but then he must’ve deleted his message. Dean frowned. Without any warning, his phone started to ring in his hands and Dean almost dropped it on his face. He somehow managed to answer the call.

“Cas?”

“Hello, Dean. I thought, since you’re not sleeping, we can talk for a moment. I hope you don’t mind.”

“Not at all. It’s good to hear from you.” Dean felt a smile forming on his lips. 

“How was your day?” Cas asked with his deep, soothing voice.

Dean bit his lip. “Wet?” 

Cas chuckled. “Mine too. I’ve just berthed in Peenemünde in Germany. I hope I won’t end up catching a cold.”

“Take a hot shower, Cas. I did it after I had docked here, it was amazing.” Dean suddenly remembered why exactly it had been amazing and he blushed heavily.

“Yes, I might just do that.” Cas stopped for a moment and then asked,“do you know where you will sail next, Dean?”

“Yeah. I decided to sail through the Kiel Canal. It’s the fastest way. I want to sail out tomorrow, I should reach Kiel in 30 hours, I think.”

“Hmm. Yes, that sounds about right. Watch out though, the wind is going to get stronger. Your reefs might not be enough. I hope you wouldn’t have to use them, but I’d install some storm sails before heading out if I were you, just in case.”

Cas was right. Dean had seen the weather forecast too and he’d planned to prepare storm jib and trysail in the morning.

“I know. I hope it won't get too crazy. Are you sailing tomorrow as well, Cas?”

“Yes, I need to reach Rostock. It seems both of us will be sailing west. Are you going to go by yourself all the way to Porto again?”

“Nah. I asked my dad for help. I just need to get to Cuxhaven and then he’s gonna join me.”

Deep hum reached Dean's ear a moment later. “I’m actually relieved. I was afraid you would try to somehow sail faster, straining yourself. Your health is of great importance, Dean,” Cas said quietly.

Dean felt a heat rising to his cheeks again. Damn, that man.

“O-okay, I will.”

“If anything changes and Bobby won’t be able to sail with you, please let me know. I’ll try to help, somehow.”

Dean’s eyes went wide and his mouth parted slightly. Did Cas just offer to join him? Dean didn't even think that was possible. On the other hand, the dude had his own work to do, he had said it himself. Asking Cas to sail with him would be definitely taking advantage of the situation, if not crossing a line again.

But damn him if, it wasn’t tempting.

“Thank you, Cas. I really appreciate it,” Dean choked out weakly. 

“Anytime,” murmured Cas. ”You mentioned you and Bobby used to sail together?”

“Yeah. He uh. He was the one who showed me sailing in the first place. I was ten. How did you get into it?”

“Hmm… We were living in Östersund. I was seven at that time. My aunt, Amara, came to visit us. She argued with my father - her brother - that I had potential. She and my father never got along very well since she was not religious. He, on the other hand, wasn’t really interested in our education except for our knowledge of the Bible. One day she just took me to the harbor and signed me to the local yacht club. I started sailing on the Optimists the next day,” Cas said quietly. “I’m grateful to her. I think she saved me, in a way. She always supported me and my siblings in our life choices and helped us when we needed it.”

Dean imagined little Cas, living in a house, where a father cared about religion and nothing else. It must have been really hard for him. Dean would know, his life hadn’t been great in the department of early childhood either.

“She sounds cool. It’s nice you had someone like her in your life.”

“That is partly why I try to provide my son with options. I want him to truly choose what he wants to do with his life.” He fell silent, then spoke again. “Don’t get me wrong, I love sailing, but my options have been limited.”

“Yeah, I hear you.”

They stayed silent for a short moment until Cas spoke once more.

“Dean, I really enjoy talking with you, but I’m already worried about your journey in a few hours. Could you please at least get some rest before you sail out?”

“You’re probably right. Thanks for calling, Cas,” Dean said.

“Could you keep me updated on your progress? I would be glad to know if you berthed in Kiel safely, Dean,” Cas said with a warm voice. 

“I will. And you, uh… Send me a message when you get to this Rostock city, okay?”

“Okay, Dean. Please, take care of yourself.”

“You too, Cas.”

Dean hung up with a fluttering feeling in his stomach. He felt like a teenager with a crush.

How had it happened was completely beyond him.

He closed his eyes in an attempt to sleep, repeating Cas’s words in his head.

+

The next morning Dean checked the weather forecast again. The wind was still strong and in the next 24 hours it wouldn't change - he couldn't wait that long to sail if he wanted to get to Cuxhaven on time, though. At least it wasn't raining anymore - small miracles.

He installed his storm sails and found a drogue, placing it in a locker near the steering wheel. He prepared himself and Baby as thoroughly as possible, all of his waterproof clothes already on him. He checked the jackstays and his life jacket, making sure it was tightly secured. When he decided he was finally ready, he turned the engine on.

Okay, here we go, Baby. 

The wind was blowing mercilessly on his starboard, making it exceptionally difficult to sail out of the harbor. Dean put both of his looped stern lines on the quay, then returned to the steering wheel. He put the shifter slow ahead, waiting for the lines to get taut. Then, he freed both lines simultaneously, causing Baby to launch in a straight line away from the quay. Some dude standing on a boat three Y-berths over nodded in admiration and waved at Dean. Dean waved back, grinning.

He drove until the harbor buoys were on his stern, then he hoisted reefed sails and turned the engine off, deciding to wait with hoisting a trysail and a storm jib for now. The sea was rough, so the boat started to rock quite violently, but when she finally gained some speed and heeled to the port side, the movements became bearable. Dean put his foot on the seat across from him to stabilize himself. He started to hum AC/DC’s ‘Wild Reputation’ silently, his mind pleasantly blank.

+

An exceptionally big wave hit the hull, soaking the bottom of the storm jib. Dean was eight hours underway, and for the last five, the storm sails had been hoisted. The sea was merciless, but at least he was sailing quite fast.

Dean went below the deck, deciding to prepare sandwiches and make tea to keep himself warm. It was crusial to stay warm - he still had a few hours of standing on deck ahead of him. While he rummaged through the fridge looking for cheese and ham, he suddenly heard the loud noise of the chartplotter's alarm. Bread and butter abandoned, he rushed to the cockpit and looked around. On Baby’s left, a big, gray tanker appeared, seemingly out of nowhere, driving almost 20 knots. Baby was undoubtedly on the ship’s route.

Sonofabitch!

To avoid a collision, Dean had to tack and do it quickly. He rushed to the sheets of the storm jib and grabbed them, standing behind the steering wheel, his heart hammering in his chest. He turned the autopilot off and steered to the right, pulling the jib sheet on the starboard and releasing the one on the port side. He should have used a winch handle, but there was no time to grab one from below the deck. The strong wind was throwing the lines violently - too violent for Dean to keep them tight and eventually, the sheet on the port side got tangled in the shroud. The Impala rocked on the waves dangerously.

Are you fucking kidding me? 

Dean glanced at the tanker, the distance between the vessel and Baby getting shorter with each passing moment. He reached for the ignition, turning the engine on, then immediately put the shifter ahead, steering into the wind. The bow went to the right, Baby bounced on the high waves and the sails flapped loudly. It was unpleasant, but no longer dangerous - he had successfully removed himself from the tanker’s route.

He tried to calm down, breathing deeply. How the fuck didn’t he spot the other vessel earlier? Before he had gone below the deck, he had checked the chartplotter, he was sure of it. He glanced at the bow, where the storm jib sheet, now even more tangled, was violently thrown by the wind. One look at the anemometer showed that the wind was now gusting 40 knots.

Get your shit together, Dean. 

He turned the autopilot on and secured himself to the jackstay. To sail further he had to untangle the jib sheet first. He crouched slowly through the deck in the direction of the bow, grabbing everything he could reach to support himself. The huge waves didn’t help in the slightest. Every other second Baby went up and down, hitting the sea with a great force. The salty water poured onto the deck, dripping over the wooden planks.

When Dean finally approached the shroud, he slipped on the wet wood, but managed to grab the guard rail and stabilize himself before he fell on his face. His knees painfully connected with the deck, instead. He hissed, then looked up, just in time for the jib sheets to smack him hard in the cheeks. Once he finally managed to grab the lines with one of his hands, he straighten them, his muscles straining with effort.

That should do it.

As he turned to go back to the cockpit, the Impala hit the water violently, coming down from the wave. Dean lost his balance again, hurting his knees even more on the hard surface of the deck. He didn’t let go of the guard rail, but it was a close call.

Finally, almost on all fours, he reached the steering wheel, panting heavily. He looked around, but there were no more massive boats coming his way. The tanker was in the safe distance from the Impala as well, so Dean turned left, returning to his route. Then, he took care of the sheets, adjusting them to the hard conditions. The sails were working properly again and Baby heeled to the port side. Finally, Dean could turn the engine off, calming his raged breaths. The only sound that remained now was the howling wind. He felt a bead of sweat traveling down his spine. 

“How the fuck didn’t I see that tanker on the chartplotter?” He asked himself out loud.

He glanced at the map, looking again for other ships, but found none. He sighed. This was undoubtedly the most dangerous situation during his whole journey so far. It was his fault that he hadn’t paid enough attention to his surroundings before he had gone below the deck. Now he would surely have some bruises to remember to never do such a thing again.

He suddenly heard Cas’s words in his head. The man had explicitly told him he was worried Dean would strain himself. Dean closed his eyes. The wind was getting stronger and his knees needed some rest. It would be wise to find a harbor - sailing straight to Kiel would be too dangerous in the storm. He looked at the chartplotter again, scanning the coastline. After a moment, he found a marina in a town in Denmark and decided to stop there and rest. He would need to focus for only two or three more hours and he definitely could do that.

He set the new waypoint and adjusted his course accordingly. 

+

Dean contacted the harbormaster in Gedser via VHF radio and informed them about his intentions, getting permission to berth. The wind was still strong, but not as much as it had been three hours prior. His knees were hurting terribly and when he glanced at himself in the mirror below the deck, he saw two red stripes under his right eye and one at the other cheek, below the line of his nose. He looked like somebody had beaten the shit out of him.

The worst thing so far had been that when Dean tried to start the engine, it had failed on the first try. It was definitely running unstable, so Dean needed to berth quickly and fix it, whatever the problem was. He suspected that during his little escapade, the sea water had poured inside the fuel tank somehow. The solution was quite simple, but he needed a few hours in the harbor to repair it. His head started to hurt.

He prepared fenders and lines, opting for the safest berthing possible. He touched the quay gently with the fenders on his port side despite the rough wind, then put knots on the cleats attached to the quay. Finally, he turned the engine off and sat on the bench in the cockpit, grunting.

He pulled his phone out and opened the message thread with Cas. His friend had sent him a short text that he had arrived at Rostock safely four hours ago. Dean started typing.

“Lucky you, Cas. You won’t believe what I’ve just experienced. I’m in Gedser and I'm afraid I have water in my tank. Talk about bad luck, huh?”

It didn’t even take Cas 10 seconds to respond.

“How long will you stay there? ”

“I’m not sure, need to fix it first. At least 6 hours, I guess? ” Dean responded, not really sure why Cas was asking in the first place.

“Are you alright, Dean? ”

“Yeah.” 

Well, technically nothing serious had happened, he didn't need to whine like a baby about a few red marks now, did he?

“I'm glad.”

Dean smiled a little and put the phone back into his pocket. He needed to get to the engine and remove the water. He went below the deck for his tools and to change into something less wet.

+

The whole process wasn't complicated, but Dean, currently poking at some hose under the engine, was covered in grease anyway. He got used to it by now, working with engines was almost always greasy. Earlier he had stripped down to his tank top and had changed to his work sweatpants, so it wasn’t really a problem. Removing the water from the tank required letting it drop into the special container, but Dean had methodically checked every other part of the engine, just in case. He was down here anyway, what was the harm?

He heard knocking somewhere above him. It was probably the harbormaster - Dean had been so overwhelmed with the whole engine situation he’d forgotten to go to the harbor office in the first place. He tried to stand up, but his knees protested painfully. He grimaced, eventually straightening himself and directing his steps onto the deck. He glanced at the quay and stopped dead in his tracks, his mouth parted and eyes wide.

Cas, with his duffel bag and messy hair, was standing in front of the Baby, under the bright light of a street lamp. Dean's jaw dropped.

Cas furrowed his brows, zeroing his gaze on Dean's cheeks.

“Cas?” Dean said weakly.

“Hello, Dean. What the hell happened to your face?” He sounded agitated. He tossed the duffel bag on the deck and stepped on the Impala, approaching Dean. He stopped a little too close, right in front of him, but Dean didn't move. He continued looking at Cas in awe. His friend examined the bruises on the right side of his face, then grabbed Dean's chin and turned his head to see the other side. Dean felt the heat creeping on his cheeks.

“The jib sheets, they um. They tangled and hit me when I tried to untangle them. It's nothing, man,” Dean said quietly. Cas narrowed his eyes and looked at Dean with a stern expression. 

“It's not nothing. You look awful and it must hurt. Why didn't you tell me?” He asked, letting go of Dean's chin.

Dean suddenly felt both guilty and strangely turned on, for no good reason at all. Cas was definitely in his angry dad mode and it was clearly doing things to Dean.

He swallowed, deciding to change the subject. “Cas, not that I'm not thrilled to see you, but how did you even get here?”

Castiel looked at the quay, breaking the intense eye contact. “By a ferry. When you wrote me a message that you had to berth quicker, I knew something must have happened. You wouldn't stop without a good reason. And the wind today was awful.”

Dean was once again surprised. Cas'd basically come to rescue him. “Didn't you like, need to deliver a boat or something?” He asked weakly.

“I did deliver it, Dean. I was in Rostock, speaking with the owner when you wrote to me. It's not far away from here, actually.” Cas glanced at his duffel bag and then back at Dean. “Like I said earlier, I want to help you, if I can. The weather turned out to be challenging, to say the least, and I know you want to reach Cuxhaven on time to meet Bobby. I can go with you.”

Dean's breath hitched. He felt deeply conflicted. One part of him was angry that Cas had assumed he needed help in the first place. He wasn't some damsel in distress, he could totally do it on his own, dammit. The other part, however, currently screaming in his head, was thrilled that he would spend more time with the guy, and they could sail together on Baby, even if just for a little while. He looked down at his shoes and bit his lower lip. There was no way he'd say no to Cas, especially when the guy was standing right in front of him.

Before he could respond, Cas spoke again. “Dean, I simply want to help you. There is no need for you to do this alone.”

Was he mind-reading now, too? Dean looked at the impossibly blue eyes before him. “How are you gonna go back home, though? And what about Jack? Don't you have to go back to him?”

“I can fly home from whichever city I choose, Dean. And if it comes to that, one more night with his grandparents shouldn’t be a problem for my son. I think he'll forgive me when I tell him I'm sailing with you, anyway. He seems to be quite fond of you.” Cas’s lips formed a discreet, sweet smile. “Maybe we could Facetime him, if you’re okay with that?”

Dean felt a heat spreading in his ribcage. The kid didn't even know him; Dean was just some stranger, practically stealing precious time with his dad. Yeah, he not only should Facetime Jack, but buy him a present or something. He owned him at least that.

He nodded, then said, “All alright. In that case, I should thank you, man. I could use your help, to be honest. I hurt my knees a little during the storm, too. It's nothing serious,” Dean added quickly when he saw a frown forming on Cas's face again, “but it would definitely be safer if I wasn't sailing alone.”

“What? How bad are they hurt, Dean? Show me,” Cas demanded, looking at Dean’s bowed legs now. Dean blushed fiercely. 

“Cas, c’mon. I can’t just strip here. They’re bruised, there is nothing to see,” he choked out. Cas gave him another intense glare. Those eyes would kill Dean one day, he was sure of it.

“Okay, but you will at least buy an ointment for pain.” Dean sighed and eventually nodded. He could tell that Cas wouldn’t give the subject up until he got out of Dean what he wanted to. “Good. Now, where can I put my things?” 

On my bed, put them on my bed and stay there with me. 

Dean cleared his throat. “You can take the fore cabin if that’s okay?” Cas nodded and finally stepped away, reaching for his duffel bag. He then steered himself below deck and Dean followed shortly after, watching Cas organizing his stuff inside of Baby. He could already tell he really, really liked the image before him.

Cas glanced in his direction. “How’s the tank? Did you manage to fix the engine?” 

“Yeah, I think so.” He looked at his watch. It was almost 11 PM. “I didn’t have the time to check anything else, though. I don’t even know how much distance to Kiel is left.”

“About 70 miles from here... Let's see, if the wind direction changes to north...” Cas muttered, sitting by the table and pulling his phone out. He stayed quiet for a moment, clearly searching for some information. Dean should probably do the same, but he couldn’t tear his eyes away from Cas’s long fingers. After a few minutes, Cas said, “It looks like we could sail out in the morning. The wind will indeed change, so we need only about 13 hours to get to Kiel. Then, we would have to wait for the sunrise to enter the canal.” He looked up from his phone. “We could easily get some rest now. Did you eat anything today?” Cas asked, raising one eyebrow.

Dean had the strangest urge to kneel and beg him for forgiveness. “Uh... Sandwiches?” He said weakly.

Cas nodded, his mouth tightened into a thin line. “Okay, I’ll make us some dinner then. You look like you could use a shower.”

Dean had to agree - he smelled and was still covered in grease from repairing the engine. He also had a strong feeling that Cas liked to be a little bossy, and he absolutely did not think about the possibilities that presented themselves with this discovery. He nodded and stood up instead, turning to look for his toiletries and a towel, still a little startled by the events of the evening. He suddenly remembered he’d never reached the harbormaster and he hadn’t actually paid for his stay - and for the showers, for that matter. On his way out he took his wallet and documents, deciding to get everything done in one go. He rushed to the quay, leaving Cas in his kitchen space, where he had started chopping some onions and garlic.

Once Dean visited the harbormaster and took care of the grease on his body, he rushed back on Baby, where Cas was almost done preparing their meal. This time, it was rice with some red sauce and beans, smelling divine - Dean had actually skipped the meal after the incident with the tanker and now found himself extremely hungry. He put his toiletries away and stood beside Cas, watching him work. He couldn’t help but notice that their height difference would allow him to comfortably kiss the guy on the neck. Which... yeah, no.

“Do you need help?” He asked, tearing his mind away from yet another part of Cas’s body.

“No, I’m almost finished. Sit down, please.”

Dean nodded and marched to the table obediently. Cas turned around soon after and passed a plate with a dish to Dean, placing himself across from him.

He studied Dean’s face again. “How did it happen that your sheets got tangled in the first place, Dean?”

Dean sighed. “Well, I actually didn’t notice the tanker on my route and went below the deck. The alarm rang, I ran out and wanted to tack quickly, but the wind was pretty strong. It tossed the lines and eventually tangled the jib sheets on the shroud. I had to move there and untangle them. That’s how I got all of the bruises,” he grimaced. “It was a stupid mistake, really. I should’ve been more careful, especially in those conditions.”

“We’ve all made mistakes, Dean. Don’t be so hard on yourself,” Cas said, grabbing a fork and digging it in the rice. Dean did the same. The dish was obviously vegan since Cas had made it, but again, it turned out to be tasty.

Dean swallowed the bite and said, “thank you for coming here, Cas. Maybe I can at least pay for the ferry fee for you? You wouldn’t be here if not for my sorry ass, after all.”

“You could certainly try If you want to make me very angry. Choose your actions wisely, Dean,” Cas raised one eyebrow again and smirked at Dean.

Dean almost choked on his tongue. “Yeah, okay. No paying back, got it,” he said quickly and focused on his rice. Cas chuckled.

They stayed silent for a while, enjoying the meal. Suddenly, Cas’s phone rang. The sound caused Dean to glance at the screen, which showed only a name - ‘Benjamin’. It was quite late for any possible calls from family. Dean glanced up at Cas, who looked at the phone, then raised his eyes at Dean, grabbing the device.

“I’m sorry, I should take this,” he said, then he stood up and went on the deck. Dean watched him go, feeling an unpleasant, overwhelming wave of anxiety. He looked at his plate, but found himself unable to eat anymore. He could hear a muffled voice from the deck. He tried really hard not to eavesdrop, but with Cas’s deep, rumbling voice it was almost impossible not to hear what he was saying.

“No, I’m not coming back tonight,” a pause, and then, “I’m…not sure yet.” Cas glanced in Dean’s direction. He looked annoyed. ”Yes. And I need to go, sorry. I’ll call you in a few days.”

When Cas went back down, Dean was carefully examining the condition of the laminate on the ceiling.

“Sorry, it was a friend.” Cas put his phone on the table and turned his face to Dean. “I think I’ll take a shower now.”

“Great, I’ll wash the dishes, then.”

Dean was in the middle of scrubbing the pan when Cas stepped on the deck with his towel, ready to head to the bathroom. They hadn't spoken about this Benjamin person, but Dean didn’t like the dude already. He did acknowledge in the back of his mind that if it had been a booty call - and it was a big if - it would in fact confirm that Cas was interested in men. Benjamin could also be exactly who Cas had said he was, so only a friend, and Cas could therefore be straight. Dean scrubbed the pan with such force he feared he would eventually make a hole in it.

Cas had come here, like a knight in shining armor, to rescue him from a bad wind and Dean didn’t know what to think of it. Was that a clue? On the other hand, Cas’s behavior could also mean he was just a caring friend and didn’t mean to be more than that. Dean could always just try to stick his tongue into Cas’s throat and see what happens, Charlie’s advice be damned, but it was extremely risky if Cas would really turn out to be straight.

And besides, Dean still didn’t watch any porn, so in case they would both end up naked, he didn’t exactly know which dick goes where.

No kissing, then, he decided, finally putting the pan away. There was no way to proceed further without additional information, was there? Dean took a deep breath and wiped his hands with a towel, then decided to prepare himself for sleep, since he didn't have any other bright ideas. When he was finally under the covers, he reached for his book and resumed reading.

Some time later, Cas came back from the bathroom, smelling fresh and oceany.

He glanced at Dean and smiled, his eyes fixed on the title of the book. “I see you found ‘The Odyssey’.” 

“Yeah, I bought it in Ystad. You have to wait for a review, though.”

Cas nodded, still smiling softly, then turned to the kitchen space. “Do you want some tea, Dean?”

“No, thanks.”

Cas took his time rummaging through possibly all of Dean’s lockers, finally finding what he was looking for. With his tea ready, he padded to his cabin but left the door open. Dean could see him changing his T-shirt, the tattoo now visible.

“It’s beautiful,” Dean said absentmindedly.

Cas turned his head in his direction. “What is?”

“Your tattoo. I really like how it looks.”

Cas smiled his little, private smile. “Thank you. You know, my friends used to call me ‘angel’ because of it.”

Angels are watching over you, Dean, he heard his mother’s voice in his head.

What are the fucking odds?

“I’d say it’s accurate. Especially if you take into account you coming to the rescue today,” Dean finally said. 

Cas sat on his bed, now in a worn-out, gray T-shirt, and locked his eyes with Dean's.

“For the record, I really think you would make it, Dean. You sailed all the way to Gotland by yourself. You didn’t need my rescue. But I’m glad I came anyway,” Cas said, smiling softly at him.

“Yeah. Me too, Cas.”

Castiel took a sip of his tea and lay down on his stomach, facing Dean, his hands under his chin. Dean closed the book and tossed it gently on the navigation table.

“What time do we get up?” He asked Cas.

“I’d say we can sail out at 8 AM. I must warn you however, I’m not really a morning person.”

Dean grinned. “Gee, Cas, I would’ve never guessed.” Cas chuckled, and Dean continued, “don’t worry, I can sail out and wake you up later if you’d like.”

“That won’t be necessary. I’m going to be fine, Dean. As long as there will be coffee, at least.” 

Yeah, that sounded about right.

“Hey, uh. How did you start to work as a full-time sailor?” Dean asked, curiosity getting the better of him.

“Oh, no, that’s not my only job,” Cas said. “I also do translations, since I know more languages than an average person. That’s what I mostly do during the winter months,” he stopped, thinking. “And I sometimes do some research about old languages and write papers about it.”

“Really? My mom used to work at the university. She did her own research connected to mythology and stuff like that. And she wrote some papers, too.”

“That’s really interesting. What was her name? Maybe I read something of hers.”

“Mary Campbell,” Dean said. Mary had worked at the university before she'd married John, so to stay recognizable in the science society, she hadn’t changed her name to Winchester. It had been one of the reasons his father couldn’t stand her work.

“It does ring a bell. I would have to check to be sure, but I think I have heard this name before. And referring to your first question - I was just good at sailing, and when I stopped racing, it appeared to be the logical next step for me.”

“Yeah," Dean muttered. "Like I said, I envy you a bit. I know owning a boat allows me to sail more than many people can, but uh… My job mainly involves sitting behind a desk. I’m not built for that, really. I’ve always enjoyed working with my hands. Pushing papers around is a nightmare. I sometimes run away for a week and sail, just to stay sane.”

Cas gave him a long look. “Perhaps there is a way for you to do what you love instead of sitting in the office, Dean? It’s a shame that you feel trapped in your own company.”

“Yeah, I'm beginning to understand I need to change something. There's no point in working like that,” Dean replied quietly. Maybe he could find a solution, somehow? He would have to talk with Sam.

They stayed silent for a moment, lost in their own thoughts, until Cas spoke again. “I think we should find a new date to resume watching ‘The Lord of The Rings’. I might’ve fallen asleep the last time. I remember Balrog and the Orcs, if it helps somehow.”

Dean snorted. “Yeah, no shit. Okay, let’s continue tomorrow in Kiel, then.” Dean bit his lower lip, thinking. “Y’know, there’s plenty of movies you should watch, like ASAP. It is unacceptable that you haven’t seen ‘Tombstone’ or ‘Star Wars’.”

Cas squinted at Dean. “You have an interesting idea of priorities, but I will watch it all with you if you finally shut up about it,” he said with a smirk.

“I will literally never shut up about movies, Cas. You need to know the classics.”

Cas rolled his eyes at him. “Alright, Dean. Whatever you say.”

“Stop it, I’m doing it for your benefit. You have to be properly educated if you want to hang out with me.”

Cas chuckled, then pushed himself up to drink more of his tea, his muscles flexing. When he put the mug on the table, he lay down, this time on his back. 

“Let's get some rest, I think we both need it.“

“Yeah,” Dean agreed, then stood up and locked the door from the inside, switching the lights out on his way back to the bed.

“Good night, Dean.”

“Night, Cas.”

Dean lay down and listened to Cas’s breathing eventually getting deep and steady. He couldn’t quite believe his friend was currently on Baby, sleeping peacefully only a few steps away from him.

He took a deep breath and closed his eyes.

An angel is watching over you. 

Maybe his mom was right, after all?

Chapter Text

Dean woke up well rested and in a good mood, despite the dull pain he felt in his knees. He opened his eyes, then stretched and yawned, his senses slowly coming back online. He sat up and looked around, his gaze focused on Cas’s messy hair on the bed in front of him.

Right, Cas is here.   

A jolt of excitement ran through him. They would spend two days together on Baby and if that wasn't something to look forward to, Dean didn't know what was. He stood up quietly and put his pants and shoes on. After a moment of consideration, he took his razor and a towel with him. Finally, he opened the door and emerged on the deck. It was sunny and bright. It looked like the weather wanted to match Dean’s mood somehow.

He marched to the bathroom with a spring in his steps, then took his time to examine his face in the mirror. It was definitely worse than yesterday since the marks on his cheeks were now violet and blue. He grimaced, but decided to focus on the things he could fix instead, and pulled out his razor. When he finished with the shaving, he moved on to his hair, styling it nicely. Then, he pulled his phone out and searched for an open pharmacy. Maybe they’d have something for bruises, after all? He turned around to use the toilet and washed his hands when he finished.

Dean went back to the Impala to get his wallet. Cas was still asleep, so he tried to remain quiet, moving around the space.

The pharmacy wasn’t far away and the weather was perfect for a small walk.

Dean opened his message thread with Charlie, deciding to update her on Cas’s visit.

“Dude, are you serious???! I am actually speechless,” she wrote back.

Dean snickered - she hardly shut up at all, so that was new. “I know. We’re heading to Kiel in a moment.”

He was getting more and more excited just to hang around with Cas, plain and simple, no funny business. His brain seemed to finally get more or less used to Cas’s hotness, allowing Dean to just enjoy his friend's company.

After a moment, he added, “I really don’t want to screw things up.”

“My dude, just keep your pants on and you’re going to be fine!” Charlie finally wrote back.

+

When he went below the deck again, he discovered that Cas didn’t even move, still deeply asleep. Nothing a good coffee and breakfast couldn’t fix, right?

Dean’s activities in the kitchen seemed to only worsen Cas’s grumpiness, judging by the sounds he was currently making. Dean chuckled softly and approached the guy with a mug of steaming, freshly brewed coffee.

“Hiya, Cas,” he said quietly. Cas didn’t react. Dean tried again a little bit louder. “Cas?” He put the mug on the table and poked Cas’s shoulder, getting a grumble in return. He put a hand on Cas’s arm and shook him a little. Cas straight-up growled at him now. Dean giggled. 

“Hey, I’ve got some coffee for you, Grumpy. C’mon, wake up.” Dean sat on the verge of the bed and shook Cas gently again.

Finally, he saw blue eyes blinking at him slowly. 

“Dean. It’s you,” said Cas, his voice hoarse.

“Of course it’s me, it’s my boat. Who did you expect?”

“I… I’m not sure. I had a strange dream,” Cas said slowly and finally sat up, stretching with his hand above his head. Dean ogled him for a moment, but then scolded himself and reached for coffee, passing it to Cas. 

“Thank you, Dean,” Cas reached for the mug and hugged it greedily. Dean snorted, getting a glare in return.

“Alright, alright. I will start breakfast,” he said and stood up, moving to the kitchen area again.

“What time is it?” Cas asked weakly after a moment.

“It's 7:30 in the morning,” Dean said, observing his friend's face. Cas looked like he still wasn’t entirely sure where he was.

The tired owl was back. 

The table was set and ready five minutes later. Dean had bought some vegan sausages in Ystad (he had been curious how they tasted) and placed them on each plate. In the meantime, Cas managed to transport himself onto a couch, a mug with coffee still glued to his hand. He glanced up at Dean, examining his cheeks with a frown.

“Your bruises look awful, Dean. Does it hurt?”

“Yeah, but I’m happy to inform you that I went to the pharmacy and bought an ointment for the swelling and pain, so it should get better soon. Shall we?” Dean waved at the table with food.

“Oh, right,” Cas said as if he suddenly remembered why was he sitting by the table in the first place.

They started eating. Dean sipped his coffee, glancing at Cas from time to time. Dude looked more awake with every passing minute, his coffee long gone. The sausages turned out mediocre in Dean’s opinion, but Cas didn’t complain.

After breakfast, Cas offered to clean up. Dean gladly accepted and went to his cabin to put an ointment on all of the bruises. His knees looked red and swollen and it was a bit painful to bend them, but according to the lady from the pharmacy, the medication he had bought should ease some pain soon.

Once he finished, Dean changed into his sailing clothes and put his life jacket on. Even if quite windy, it was supposed to be warm and sunny the whole day. He turned around and glanced at Cas, who searched through his duffel bag, undoubtedly looking for his sailing clothes, too.

Not wanting to stand there idle, Dean decided to check the weather forecast. It would be nice to be sure nothing was going to surprise them today. The apps showed sunny, nice weather, so everything looked good for now. Satisfied, Dean put the phone down and glanced back at Cas, who was now tying his shoes. He was wearing a blue sports shirt and black sailing pants.

“Okay, I think I'm set," Dean said. "What about you, Cas?”

“Same,” Castiel said, straightening himself. He reached somewhere beyond Dean's sight and pulled out his cowboy hat.

Apparently, Dean would be suffering today, too.

“Who will sail out?” Cas asked, tightening his life jacket.

Dean frowned. He always maneuvered the Impala in harbors and it never really had crossed his mind Cas could do it himself. “Uh...” he started intelligently. When he actually thought about it, Cas was probably more capable of steering a boat than Dean would ever be - but it was Baby they were talking about. Dean felt his hands getting sweaty. “Yeah, no, I mean, you can sail out, why not?” He said in a strangled voice.

Cas squinted at him. “You can do it if you want, Dean. I'm not going to steal the steering wheel from you,” he tilted his head to the side and smirked, “but I would like to remind you that you underestimated me once already and lost a bet in the process.”

“That’s playing dirty, man. Alright, just... Be gentle?” Dean said quietly, his eyes pleading.

“Of course. I'm always gentle,” Cas said and shot him a look that would probably make Dean blush if he wasn't so deep in the process of freaking out.

Cas went on the deck to disconnect the electrical cable from the quay, leaving Dean to turn the chartplotter on. He pushed the buttons on the control board, then stepped on the deck and made sure everything was working. Soon after, Cas came back with the cable and put it into the locker on the deck.

Finally, he looked around, then up at the mast.

“I'd move the bow first. Let's put the fenders in the right position,” he said, then looked at Dean again. “We can still switch. All you need to do is ask.” 

Dean shook his head. “Yeah, I know. But uh, I trust you, Cas. You do it.”

“Alright. Thank you.” Cas smiled a little. “So, fenders? And let's put a loop on the stern spring line.”

They worked separately for a moment, preparing the Impala for casting off. When all was set, Cas stood behind the steering wheel, and Dean marched to the quay to unclear the lines. Cas turned the engine on, which started without any problems this time.

He glanced at Dean, then nodded in admiration. “It looks like the engine works fine. Good job,” Cas said. Dean grinned at him, feeling stupidly pleased with the praise. He was a professional, dammit, of course, he would fix it.

He couldn’t seem to stop smiling, anyway.

“Okay, let's remove the bow and stern line,” Cas ordered.

Dean dropped the lines, throwing them on the deck, then marched back on the boat, supporting his weight on a shroud. In the meantime, Cas put the shifter astern, causing the bow to move away from the quay. 

“Could you take care of the stern spring line for me, Dean?”

Dean nodded and moved to the stern, dropping the line. Cas put the shifter ahead. The Impala drove forward obediently.

“It wasn’t so bad, was it?” Cas glanced at Dean, visibly amused.

“Give me a break, man. I love this boat,” Dean grumbled back.

“I know, Dean and I would never do anything to harm her. You’re just…” Dean shot him an irritated look. Cas snorted. “...very entertaining.”

They drove like this for a moment but soon reached the open sea and hoisted the sails. They left both genoa and mainsail reefed since it was still pretty windy. Dean found a winch handle and, this time, placed it in the cockpit’s locker. The Impala gained some speed and heeled to the port side. 

Cas observed the sails for a moment, then looked at the boat’s speed. “She can go faster,” he said with a gleam in his eyes. “Can you steer for a moment?” He asked. 

Dean took over the steering wheel and observed how Cas adjusted the sails to his liking. Then, he moved to the winches, and eventually the blocks of the jib sheets, fumbling with everything. He was clearly in his element. When he came back to the cockpit, Baby was already gaining speed.

“There. Let her fly,” Cas said, observing the sails again, his cheeks turned pink, lips parted. When Dean eventually managed to tear his eyes away from Cas’s cheekbones, he focused on Baby, now gliding smoothly through the waves, showing her true potential.

“This is amazing,” Dean stated, enjoying the moment.

Cas grinned, then sat comfortably at the bench in the cockpit, his muscled thighs stretching the fabric of his pants. “Your boat is exquisite, Dean. You did a magnificent job restoring her," he said quietly. Dean noticed Cas’s knee was almost bumping his right calf.

“Thanks, Cas. Um, y’know, I was thinking, if you guys visit me in Porto, we could take Baby on a race or two? We would take Jack with us on board. Maybe we could show him that sailing can be fun?”

Cas looked up in surprise, meeting Dean's eyes, then he looked at the sea in front of him, thinking.

“I’d be honored to race on her with you, Dean. I don’t know about Jack, though, I would have to ask him.“ He looked back at Dean, a glint of enthusiasm flickered in his gaze. ”Or perhaps we could ask him together?”

“Sure thing, buddy. So, you wanna visit me in Porto, after all,” Dean said, just to be sure they were on the same page here.

“I told you that already, but you still need to specify how long we should stay.”

“As long as possible, Cas. I won’t change my mind.” 

Cas’s lips formed a little smile. “You’re going to regret this, Dean.”

“No, I won’t.”

Cas narrowed his eyes at him. “Why are you so stubborn?”

“Pot, meet kettle,” Dean said, grinning.

Cas huffed and shook his head. “As you wish,” he finally said. 

Dean's grin widened. “That's what I'm talking about! We will watch so many movies together, dude!”

“I can imagine,” Cas said dryly, but his eyes, now radiant with delight, gave him away.

They continued sailing, switching between chatting and pleasant silence from time to time. After a while, Dean started humming, basking in the warm rays of the sun, yesterday's storm long forgotten. Suddenly, an idea came to his mind. "Hey, would you mind if we listened to some classic rock, Cas?"

“Not at all. Do you need me to steer her?”

Dean nodded and handed over the steering wheel to his friend. Once he was halfway below the deck, he heard Cas's voice from above. “Could you make me some tea while you’re there?”

“Sure, which one? I’ve got green and black and-”

“I know, Dean. I checked yesterday. Raspberry would be great.”

Dean nodded again and moved to the kitchen area to heat some water. When he put the kettle on the burner hob, he turned around and switched the radio on, plugging his phone in. He tapped a few times, looking for a specific song. A few seconds later, he heard the intro and first chords of ‘Cherry Pie’. He sang along loudly while he prepared Cas's tea.

When he reemerged on the deck a moment later, Cas was grinning at him. “I didn’t know you could sing, Dean.”

Dean winked at him but apart from that didn’t respond, singing along with the Warrant. He put the tea in the holder, sat on the bench, and kept singing until the song ended, and the next one started.

“I only sing on the boat and under the shower. Even my brother doesn’t know I can sing, so don’t rat me out, Cas.”

“That’s a shame, you’ve got a nice voice.” Cas reached for his tea and sipped it slowly. “How old are you, Dean?”

“I’m 36. You?”

“I will turn 40 in September.”

“Oh really? Which day?” 

Cas threw him a suspicious look. “Why do you ask?”

Dean chuckled. “C’mon, tell me, Cas. I’m gonna use this knowledge only to do good, I swear.”

“18th of September.”

“And what about Jack?”

“18th of May.” Cas cocked his head. “When’s your birthday, Dean?”

“24th of January.” 

Cas sipped from his mug again. “And how do you celebrate your birthday?”

“I mean, I don’t really like to celebrate it, but usually Charlie throws a party, which she loves to do, by the way, so there’s no way to stop her. We go to a club, drink, and dance," he said, observing the sails. "But I need to be basically plastered to dance, I don’t normally do it,” he added after a beat.

“That’s a shame. Dancing is nice,” Cas stated. 

Dean’s brain short-circuited when he imagined Cas, all sexy and sweaty, on the dancefloor. What a sight that would be. “So, you dance, I assume?”

Cas glanced at him and smirked. “Sometimes.” 

Yeah, Dean would pay really good money to see that. 

“Did you know that honeybees dance to communicate with each other?” Cas continued after a moment.

Dean had to admit, it was probably the last thing he would think of. “No, uh… I didn’t know that,” he finally responded with a soft smile. Cas was so adorably strange sometimes.

Minutes passed and the fluffy clouds traveled through the bright, blue sky, pushed by the strong wind. Castiel looked content steering Baby, so Dean let him be. He decided to read a little, enjoying the pleasant weather. He went below the deck to retrieve his sunglasses and a book, then reemerged outside and sat comfortably, his legs stretched out.

“You don’t get seasick, I assume?” Cas asked, looking at the book in Dean's hands. Reading could actually worsen the symptoms of this particular illness.

Dean shook his head. “What about you?”

“Only mildly and when the weather is exceptionally shitty.”

Dean resumed his reading a moment later. It felt... nice, spending time like this. He was calm and relaxed, with Cas beside him and the music quietly playing in the background. It didn’t escape Dean’s attention that Cas hummed to a few songs, clearly knowing some of Dean’s favorite bands.

Some time after, Castiel looked down at the chartplotter, then tapped on the screen a few times and frowned. He looked to his left, where quite far away another boat was sailing in the same direction as Baby.

“What’s wrong?” Dean asked, alarmed by Cas’s behavior.

“Nothing, I just know this sailboat. My friend may be sailing on it, but I can't be sure.”

Dean moved and stood next to Cas so he could see the screen as well. The boat Cas was talking about was named ‘Rose’ and was currently on the Impala’s route, so they would eventually get closer to each other.

“Well, do you want to say hi? We could call them on the VHF,” Dean proposed.

“If it’s really Balthazar, I will call him out. But let’s wait for now. I want to make sure it’s him, first.”

Dean nodded, then asked, “do you wanna switch?”

Cas only shook his head and smiled. 

“If you want to, just say so,” Dean continued.

“I’m okay,” Cas reassured him. Dean nodded again, then sat back on the bench. 

They fell silent for a moment, until Cas spoke again, ”I’ve never really wanted my own sailboat, but when I look at you and see how you treat your Baby, I think that maybe it wouldn’t be such a bad idea.” 

Dean smiled a little. “Why wouldn’t you want a boat, Cas?”

“Well, for starters, it’s expensive. But more importantly, you need time for both sailing and maintenance. I don’t have time as it is, so with a sailboat, it would only get worse. Perhaps, if Jack liked sailing, I’d change my mind. Like you said, it could be a pleasant way to spend time with your family,” Cas paused, lost in thoughts.

“Well, if you ever feel like buying a boat, just let me know,” Dean said.

Cas looked at him, a smirk forming on his lips. “Why? Do you know someone who sells good ones?” 

Dean snorted. “Wow, yyou're an asshole.”

It didn't take long for Cas to start laughing too, causing Dean to giggle even louder.

Dean missed being this absurd with someone, he thought, looking at Cas's wide smile.

After they had finally calmed down, Cas spoke again. “Would you mind switching? I need to use the head.”

“Yeah, sure,” Dean said, then stood up and put his head into the companionway, tossing the book on his bed. When he walked to the steering wheel and grabbed it, Cas stepped to the side, giving Dean room. Then, he took his empty mug and disappeared below the deck. Dean glanced at the chartplotter, looking for any possible obstacles, but the only single one was Rose, now sailing pretty close to them. When he turned to his left, Dean could see two people on the deck of the other boat.

After a short while, Cas reappeared in the companionway. He glanced at the Rose as well, crossing his arms. 

“I believe Balthazar is there, after all. Alright, let me take the radio,” he said, then went below the deck again and came back with the portable VHF. He pushed the button to talk.

“Rose, Rose, Rose, this is Impala, over.”

They waited for the response for only a short moment.

“Impala, this is Rose. Go to channel 72, over,” somebody with a thick, British accent spoke from the other vessel.

Cas changed the channels and spoke again, “Rose, this is Impala. Is that you, Balthazar?”

“Cassie? I thought I knew this voice from somewhere! What the hell are you doing on some fancy, American boat, my friend?”

Dean couldn’t argue with the guy, Baby was super fancy, after all. He smirked at Cas, who smiled back at him.

“I’m here with my friend, Dean, it’s his fancy boat. We’re sailing to Kiel. What about you?”

“Oh, I’m going to Flensburg with a crew. We’re currently in the middle of a poker game, you see. I actually think you might remember one of the girls currently sailing with me, she says you were their captain last year. Does the name April ring any bells?”

Cas grimaced. Dean couldn’t help but snort. Whoever this April was, Cas wasn’t her biggest fan.

Castiel collected himself fast, then replied, “Yes, I remember. Um, how’s the journey going?”

“So far, so good, my friend. It’s good to see you’re well. Will you be so kind to change a course a little so we won't have to tack, Cassie?”

Cas glanced at Dean, who shrugged. He didn’t really mind.

“Okay. Take care, Balthazar. To the next meeting.”

“Fair winds and following seas, Cassie!” A tall figure on the Rose - probably Balthazar - stood up and started waving at them, so Dean waved back. In the meantime, Cas put the radio on the table below the deck, then came back outside and looked at Dean again.

“Will you turn left? I’ll take care of the sheets.”

Soon, the Impala was on a new course and Rose’s stern moved to their starboard.

“Who the hell is April and what did she do to you?” Dean chuckled a moment later. Cas shot him an irritated look. Dean stopped smiling immediately.

“Well, I was a captain and she was part of the crew. We were sailing to Stralsund at the time. She appeared to try to seduce me, I think? I kept saying that I was not interested, but she didn’t want to give up. One night she just um. Came naked to my cabin. I basically had to lock myself inside,” Cas ended with a wince.

“Oh my fucking god, are you serious?” Dean asked, suddenly becoming very angry.

“Yes. I ordered her to leave the boat at the next stop, she had to go back by plane, I think.”

“What a bitch,” Dean said and glanced in the direction of the other boat. “Unbelievable.”

“That’s definitely the downside of sailing with other people if you don’t know them beforehand. Until you are in the middle of the sea, you have no idea who they are. And they may turn out to be just… bad.” 

Dean glanced at Cas. “What made you believe I’m not bad?”

Cas smiled, his eyes gleaming again. “I had a hunch.” 

Dean chuckled, then said quietly, “Did you, now?”

Cas shrugged. “Sooner or later we will find out, won’t we? But you don’t look crazy to me, Dean,” he ended with a smirk, then sat down and looked around. After a few moments, he yawned, then lay down on the bench, his head resting on the winch, legs and arms crossed. Eventually, Cas put his hat on his face, so the sun wouldn’t disturb him. Dean was almost positive that he had drifted to sleep a few minutes later.

“I hope you are right, buddy,” Dean said quietly.

+

Dean kept steering for the next three hours. There was almost no traffic and he had to correct his course only once.

Sailing like this, with Cas nearby and music still playing in the background, made Dean feel stupidly relaxed. He stopped paying attention to the flow of time, focusing solely on the beautiful weather and the sound of trimmed sails.

The next time he glanced at his watch, it was almost 4 in the afternoon. Cas seemed to be still asleep, but Dean started to feel quite hungry and needed to pee. He decided to finally wake the guy up.

“Cas?” He said quietly. To his surprise, Cas startled awake almost immediately, then sat up, put his hat on his head, and looked around. “That was quick,” Dean muttered under his breath.

Cas stretched and glanced at Dean, fully awake and alert. “Let’s switch,” he said, then stood up and grabbed the steering wheel. Dean stepped away and looked at the guy in disbelief.

“What?” Cas asked, his face devoid of any emotion.

Dean snorted but quickly got his face under control when he saw Cas’s glare.

“Nothing. I’ll start dinner. Any wishes, Cas?”

“I don’t have any preferences. Whatever you make, as long as it’s vegan.”

Dean nodded and went to the toilet. When took care of his business, he went back to the kitchen space and started wondering what he could cook for them today. He still had some pasta left, so the easiest would definitely be spaghetti, but he needed to make it plant-based. He had an idea though, so he got to work.

Half an hour later, Dean came outside with two steaming bowls in his hands. He passed one to Cas, who thanked Dean, switched the autopilot on, and sat down, digging into his dish.

Dean had added sun-dried tomatoes and olives to twist the taste a little, and he was pretty curious if Cas would like it.

From the look of it, the guy seemed quite happy with the meal.

“Dean, I really don’t know how you do it. This is so good,” Cas said between the bites.

“Yeah?” Dean asked. Cas nodded in confirmation, devouring the pasta.

A smile formed on Dean’s lips. He started getting a little addicted to Cas’s praises. He had to say though, the spaghetti wasn’t half bad. Maybe he could start cooking vegan meals at home from time to time, too?

Once they finished, Dean took the plates and went below the deck to wash the dishes. He made a new tea for Cas and brought it with him outside, placing it in the cup holder. Cas smiled and thanked him. Dean sat comfortably on the bench and looked at his friend. Cas was hand-steering the Impala again. 

“You can rest if you’d like. I’ll make sure we’re safe,” Cas said in his deep voice.

It was the strangest feeling for Dean, to actually believe those words. Usually, when he was sailing with other people, he tried to remain alert at all times. He just couldn't bring himself to trust that the boat and crew would be safe in the hands of anyone other than him. This time it was different - he felt quite positive that Castiel was capable of sailing them safely to whatever place he would choose. 

Besides, the waves steadily hitting the hull had made Dean a little drowsy, if he was being honest with himself. He glanced at his watch. “If it’s really okay with you, I could catch some z’s,” he said. “Wake me up if something happens.”

Cas smiled a little, then nodded.

Dean turned around and marched below the deck, steering himself to his bed. He hung his hat on the hook and lay down. It wasn’t the first time he had left someone steering his boat while he had gone to sleep. When they had sailed with Benny through the Atlantic Ocean, he'd had to rest too, but he’d never truly felt safe while sleeping.

How his body had straight up decided to just trust Cas was truly hard to believe. He took a deep breath and closed his eyes. Lulled by the sea, he fell asleep soon after.

+

“Dean?”

He heard a rumbling voice right beside his ear. It was deep and pleasant. He smiled and reached for the source of the sound, his eyes closed. Soon, he felt with his fingertips soft, short hair. Another hand gently grabbed his wrist, moving his palm away from the softness and placing it in the other warm and smooth hand. The scent of a storm surrounded him.

“Dean, wake up.”

He slowly opened his eyes and blinked a few times, finally turning his head to the person currently sitting on his bed. Cas’s brow was raised and he was gently smiling. He was holding Dean’s hand in his palm. Dean blinked.

“We’re in Kiel.”

Dean blinked again. He slowly realized he had just stroked Cas’s hair and they were currently holding hands. His heart rate increased and his eyes widened. He gently removed his hand from Cas's grasp. 

“Sorry,” he said weakly, then realized what Cas had actually said. “Wait, what?”

“We’re in Kiel, I’ve just turned the engine off. I thought you’d want to know. Besides, it’s quite lovely, the sun is setting. Do you want to come on the deck and see it?”

Dean’s mouth formed an ‘O’. Had he just slept through the rest of the day? He glanced at his watch and yep, it was past 9 PM.

“Why didn’t you wake me earlier?” He asked with a frown.

“You said I should wake you if something happens. Nothing happened, so I let you sleep,” said Cas smoothly. Well, the guy was technically right, but there was no need for Dean to sleep like a princess while Cas basically sailed his ass to Kiel.

“Dude, I shouldn’t rest while you are doing all the work!” Dean whined.

“Why not?”

Dean stared at him, searching for an argument, but he couldn't find any. Actually, he was convinced there were a whole lot of reasons, but nothing came to his mind. He huffed. Cas only smiled wider.

“Well…” Dean started eventually, but Cas interrupted him before he could come up with anything smart.

“Come on. You will miss the sunset,” and then the dude stood up and marched out, steering himself on the deck. Dean sighed, then followed his friend outside.

They were at the harbor, the fenders on the stern touching the quay. Cas had docked them in the Y-berth and had put all the lines in the correct positions. 

Of course, he did. He's a professional, you moron. 

The sun reflected on the water, now tinted red and orange. Dean sat on the bench in the cockpit and glanced at Cas, who observed the colorful sky. Summer was slowly blooming around them, the evening birds could be heard in the nearby trees and the crickets chirped loudly in the grass. Dean felt his heart rate finally returning to normal, and calmness washed over him. Cas had been right, it was indeed a lovely sunset. Dean suddenly remembered about a Scottish whisky he had bought in one of the shops in the UK.

“Cas, you wanna drink? I’ve got Scotch.” 

Castiel turned his gaze at Dean. “Sure, why not?”

Dean went below the deck to find two glasses and a bottle he put in his duffel bag a while ago. He had planned to give it to Sam, but he could always buy him another one on his way back home. He poured three fingers of the single malt into each glass, then reemerged outside and passed one drink to Castiel. Finally, he sat back on the bench.

“Thanks for this," he said after a beat. "The sailing and the company. And for letting me rest, too.” Dean lifted his gaze from his glass and looked at Cas. Their eyes met again. 

“I hope you know I’m enjoying your company and sailing with you as much as you are with me, Dean. And as for letting you rest, you did the same for me. I think we’re even,” Cas said, then took a sip from his glass. “Oh, this is good,” he stated, examining the amber fluid.

Dean sniffed his whisky, then took a sip as well.

“You’re right. No surprise it was so damn expensive. I wanted to give this to my brother, but screw that.”

Cas snorted and took another sip. 

After a moment, Dean started again. “You and I, we make a good team together, huh?”

Cas glanced at him, and a smile flickered across his face. “Yes, I suppose we do.”

“Listen, uh, if you ever need help or something happens, or you just need an additional sailor to your crew, let me know. I’d be happy to help if I can, man.”

“Okay, Dean. But only if you promise to do the same.”

Dean nodded in agreement and sipped his whisky. It left a pleasant burn on his tongue.

“You know, I actually think we should do this again even if we don’t end up in some kind of trouble,” said Cas after a moment, a spark of mischief dancing in his eyes.

“I think you’re right. Hey, maybe you’ll start sailing closer to Portugal? It’s definitely warmer there than here,” Dean grinned, looking back at Cas.

“Maybe I will,” Cas said and returned a smile.

They sipped their whisky until the glasses were empty, and Dean could pour them another round. The alcohol warmed him a little from the inside, his muscles pleasantly relaxing.

“Hey, Cas, what’s your favorite musician?”

“Taylor Swift and Beyonce.”

Dean nearly choked on his drink. How was this dude even real?

Cas gave him an unimpressed look. “They’re great musicians, Dean.”

“I mean, I respect that,” Dean said slowly, fighting with his face. He vividly remembered how he had danced to ‘Bad Blood’ only a few days ago. “And what about AC/DC, Guns N' Roses, or, y'now, Metallica?”

“I like them too,” Cas smirked at Dean, a playful glint lit up his gaze. “But I really wanted to see your reaction.”

Dean started laughing. “You’re such an asshole, Cas, I swear.”

“And you want to sail with me more, anyway. No backsies, sorry,” Castiel said smugly.

When they finished another round, Dean suddenly remembered they had no more vegan food left—when he had restocked in Ystad, he hadn’t known Cas would join him, and now they were running low on ingredients. “Cas, I think we need to get some groceries,” he said with a frown.

“Okay, let me just grab my hoodie.”

It wasn’t such a bad idea to put on something warmer, so Dean decided to follow Cas inside and find his fleece jacket. When he stood up, he discovered he was a little bit tipsy. He took both glasses and a flask and put them on the counter inside, then turned to his cabin and rummaged through his duffel bag. When he had finally found the jacket and turned around, Cas was standing behind him with an innocent look.

“What?” 

“Nothing. Shall we?” Said Cas and marched at the deck, Dean following shortly after him.

It was getting dark pretty fast and the street lamps were lit already. Dean locked Baby’s door, then stepped at the quay and stopped next to Cas. 

“Do you know where to go?”

“Yes, I know a shortcut,” Castiel stated.

They soon left the harbor and moved onto the sidewalk. Cas led the way like a man on a mission and Dean followed him obediently, humming ‘Thunderstruck’. He wasn’t paying any attention to his surroundings, so when Cas suddenly stopped, Dean almost bumped into his friend’s back. He looked around. They were standing in front of a fence.

“It wasn’t here before,” Cas said, looking offended by the barrier's presence.

“Oh, well, I’m sure we can go around it somehow?”

"No, we'll climb over it."

“What?” Dean asked stunned, but Cas was halfway up the fence already.

“Hurry up Dean, so no one sees us," he whispered.

This guy’s crazy. 

“Dean, move your ass, now.”

Startled, Dean grabbed the fence and pulled himself up. At the same time, Cas jumped to the other side and looked up at Dean. “Do you need a hand to come down?” He asked, his eyes gleaming in the dark.

Dean snorted. “No, go away,” he said, then jumped, trying to land on the soft grass. His knees protested painfully and Dean landed on all fours instead.

“Graceful landing.”

“Shut up, Cas,” Dean said, wincing.

“Oh shit, I forgot about your knees. Are you okay?” Cas asked, moving closer. He extended his hand to help Dean stand up, then lifted him with one swift movement without any effort. 

Damn. He could easily throw me around, Dean's brain happily supplied.

“Yeah, I’ll live,” he said out loud.

A bottle of whisky, which he’d had to take with him from the Impala, suddenly materialized in Cas's hand. 

“Here,” he said, handing it to Dean with a grin.

Dean shook his head in disbelief, but took a bottle and pulled it closer to himself. “We’re taking a different way back, you hear me?” He grumbled.

“Alright, as you wish,” Cas said, still grinning.

Dean took a sip from the bottle, then handed it back to Cas, who drank a bit too. It was silly, but at the same time Dean felt alive - he hadn’t behaved like this since college.

They resumed walking, the whisky hidden again somewhere under Cas’s clothes. Soon, they saw a sign of a small shop, shining in the distance. When they entered the space, Cas marched straight to the vegetables. Dean followed him and stopped in front of the vegetables. He started to wonder what he could cook with an eggplant or a zucchini when Cas grabbed both and put them into the bag. Where had he gotten the bag, Dean was not sure.

“Do you know what to do with an eggplant, Cas?” Dean asked thoughtfully.

Cas squinted at him, then asked, “Don’t you?”

Dean was surprised at how much his friend cared about eggplants. Maybe he could find some recipes online if this particular vegetable was so close to Cas’s heart? He felt Cas pull him away from the shelf by his sleeve, steering him towards the pasta and rice alley. His friend put more and more stuff into the bag, half of which Dean didn’t even recognize. When he seemed satisfied, Cas grabbed some bread and rolls and went to the checkout, dragging Dean along. A lady sitting behind the counter started talking in German, and to Dean’s utter surprise, Cas answered in German as well. Dean frowned at him, but Cas didn’t pay him any attention. When it was time for payment, Dean tried to push his card first, but Cas was quicker. Dean rolled his eyes in response.

Once they finished shopping and stepped out into the night, Dean turned his head to Cas. “You know German?”

“I know German.”

“Why didn’t you tell me you know German?”

“I just did.”

“Stop it, you know what I mean,” Dean said, slightly irritated.

“It didn’t come up and you didn’t ask. What difference does it make, anyway? I know a few languages, I told you that.”

Dean frowned, then remembered that Cas actually had said he knew more than one language. Dean had just assumed he’d meant English and Swedish. 

“Yeah, you did. What other languages do you know, Cas?”

“I won’t tell you.”

“Why not?”

“I want to stay mysterious,” Cas deadpanned. Dean snorted, and then Cas joined him in laughing.

“Okay, smartass,” Dean finally said, then pulled out his phone and ignored all of Sammy’s messages, opening the map. He was determined to go around the fence this time and he didn’t trust Cas to guide them back to the boat.

Suddenly, his stomach grumbled. Dean looked down, then at Cas again. “I’m hungry. Aren’t you hungry, Cas?”

“I could eat. There should be a kebab stall not far from here.”

“Alright, but I’m not jumping through fences anymore.”

They started walking, following the directions from Google Maps. They soon reached a stall that Cas had described. It looked terrible, but Castiel swore they made good vegan kebabs, and Dean decided to trust him. They both bought plant-based ones.

Chewing through their meals, they finally reached the Impala and sat in the cockpit, their knees bumping. The moon was now fully up, illuminating the deck with a soft glow. Cas pulled out the whisky and Dean picked up their glasses from below the deck.

“One last drink, Dean. We can't get completely wasted, we have to get up early.”

“Says the guy who took the whole bottle with us to the shop.” 

Cas chuckled. “Live a little, grandpa,” he said, raising his eyebrows.

“You’re older than me.”

“I am, so you need to listen to me. Finish your drink, Dean.”

The bickering was pleasant and Dean felt a nice buzz from the alcohol they had consumed. He was almost sure that he had laughed with Cas more during those few days than in the last ten years of his life combined.

When their glasses were empty again, Cas stood up and helped Dean to stand up as well. His vision blurred a little and the deck swayed slightly. 

“I’m going to get a shower. Are you coming, Dean?”

“Yeah, sure.”

Dean faintly remembered it wasn’t such a good idea to go to the bathroom with Cas, but he wasn’t exactly sure why. The thought flew from his head as quickly as it came, so he decided to ignore it completely. He went below the deck for his towel and toiletries. When he was ready, he turned around and marched outside again, closing the door behind him. Cas was waiting for him on the deck.

“Alright, lead the way,” Dean said with a smirk.

The bathroom was quite spacious, but the interesting part was undoubtedly the communal showers, put next to each other without any walls in between. Dean blinked, then looked at Cas, who furrowed his brow.

“I don’t understand, they were supposed to renovate it,” he said, visibly confused. He eyed the showers nervously, then glanced at Dean.

“What?” Dean asked.

“Nothing,” Cas shrugged, then put all of his things on the bench and started to undress himself, facing the wall. When Dean saw Cas’s tattoo, he suddenly remembered why showering next to his friend was a bad idea.

And then he glanced at the showers again, mortified.

He started to panic. He turned to the other bench and put his things away, feeling a little dizzy. It’s not like he could just leave now, that would be super weird. Any possible sexy thoughts fled his mind, replaced by raw fear. He closed his eyes. 

You’re gonna undress, you’re gonna see his dick and you’re gonna be normal about this, he ordered himself.

Dean took off his T-shirt and pants and started removing his underwear, trying to focus solely on his body parts. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Cas's bare calves moving towards one of the showers. 

When Dean finally stood and looked up, he saw a very naked front of Cas’s body. The dude was in the middle of washing his torso, his eyes closed. Dean was determined to stay cool and composed, so he tried not to glare and marched his bare ass to the next shower, turning the water on. He yelped almost immediately because the stream turned out to be terribly cold. Cas snorted at his left. Dean couldn’t help, but laugh too.

“Shut up.”

“You’re funny, Dean.”

“Fuck you,” Dean chuckled.

And just like that, the nervousness between them disappeared completely. The water soon became warm and Dean went under the stream again. After a moment, he started to sing Taylor’s ‘Blank Space’ out loud and Cas sang the chorus with him. Apparently, they were too loud, because some guy came and scolded them in German. Luckily, Cas replied with something that calmed the dude down.

They went back to the Impala through the quay, shushing themselves. Dean couldn’t stop giggling. When he finally managed to open the boat, they stumbled inside and started laughing again.

“Oh shit, we were supposed to watch a movie,” Dean suddenly remembered.

“It’s too late for that now. Let’s do it tomorrow,” Cas said.

“Yeah,” Dean sighed, then turned to his bed and looked at Cas, who was getting under the covers in his cabin. Dean closed the door and switched off the lights, then lay on his bed. Cas was looking at him now, a smile flickered across his face.

“Dean?”

“Yeah?”

“I really like to spend time with you.”

“Yeah, me too, Angel. Go to sleep.”

“Alright, Dean. Good night.”

“Night, Cas.”

Chapter Text

Dean woke up with a slight headache before his alarm went off. He smiled, however, as the memories from the previous evening flooded his mind. He couldn’t remember the last time he had jumped through the fences and drunk liquor straight from the bottle in the middle of the night. He couldn’t remember being this absurd and carefree, just straight-up happy.

He glanced towards Cas’s cabin. The guy was still asleep, snoring gently. Dean propped himself up on his elbows and looked around, stopping his gaze at the clock on the wall. It was 4:40 AM.

He was obviously well-rested, since Cas had let him sleep yesterday for fuck knows how long. He could at least return the favor now and let the guy sleep a little bit longer. He quietly stood up and found his sailing trousers, a shirt, and a new pair of underwear. He noticed he was running short of clean clothes, so he should probably do some laundry in the next harbor.

He took his time to apply the ointment again. His face looked better already, he decided.

When he was dressed and ready, he put on his fleece jacket and a life jacket, then moved to the navigation station and turned on the electronics, starting the VHF radio too. Finally, he opened the Impala’s door and stepped outside. The morning, fresh air welcomed him. The sun was already up and the mist was rising over the water. Few other crew members were on their decks, clearly preparing to pass the Kiel Canal as well. Dean shot the door behind him, so he wouldn’t disturb Cas’s rest and marched to the deck to prepare the lines. When everything was ready, he went back to the cockpit and turned the engine on. The sweet sound of Baby waking up to life filled his ears. Dean grinned. It was going to be a good day.

He had read in Ystad about entering the canal - the idea of the passage was to drive inside the locking area, berth, and wait with the other ships until the water level would rise. Only then, all the vessels could move forward into the canal.

Dean took off smoothly and maneuvered the Impala from the marina. He left the fenders on his hull and moved Baby until he could clearly see the signal indicating he could enter the locking area. It usually took a few hours to pass the canal itself, which was over 60 miles long, so starting early in the morning was crucial if he wanted to get to the other side the same day. When he saw a white, flashing light, he put the shifter ahead and entered the area slowly, berthing port side to the hull of another boat. He handed his lines to a nice, German captain to his left, who kindly knotted them on his cleat.

Dean turned the engine off.

There was nothing else to do but wait, and it could take up to even a few hours, so he decided to check on his friend below the deck. When he opened the door and took a few steps inside, he saw Cas’s eyes slowly blinking at him from under his covers.

“Hello, sunshine. Want some coffee?” He asked, bending down a little to see his friend better. He saw a faint nod in response.

“Alright. One coffee, coming right up!” Dean turned to the kitchen area, filled the Moka pot with water, and ground coffee beans, then put it on one of his burner hobs. He glanced at Cas, who hadn’t moved at all, his eyes now closed. Dean chuckled and shook his head. The guy was a true mystery when it came to waking up.

When the pot started to gurgle, Dean took it away from the fire and filled two mugs with the freshly brewed beverage. He took one and approached Cas, putting the mug on the table, so the guy could reach for it when he was ready. 

“Hey, you okay?”

A single nod in response.

“Okay. I’m gonna see if everything is good outside. We’re entering the canal.”

Another nod. Dean chuckled again and stood up, taking his coffee with him and marching back on the deck.

When he stepped out, he saw a few more boats had entered the area behind him. A cute lady was currently standing on the bow of the sailboat berthed right at Baby’s stern. He waved to her and sat down on his bench, taking a sip from the mug.

“Hello,” she said. Dean smiled politely and nodded in her direction. “Beautiful boat,” she continued.

“Thank you,” Dean replied. He could see that she was not only admiring Baby but also checking him out. Why was it so obvious for him when it came to women, but he had no fucking clue what was Cas thinking? He took another sip of the coffee, pondering on the injustice of the world.

His phone buzzed unexpectedly, so Dean pulled it out. Sam seemed to be trying to contact him again, sending him new messages. He unlocked the screen and decided to call his brother, who, for some crazy reason, was awake at 5:45 in the morning.

“Hello, little brother. Why do you seek my wisdom?”

“I… don’t?” he heard Sam’s tired voice.

“What do you mean ‘you don’t’?”

“You’re hilarious,” Sam deadpanned. “How’s the trip back going?”

“So you do miss me, after all? I’m getting some mixed signals here.”

“Dean,” Sam huffed. ”You don’t check your messages, and you call, well, sometimes. Half of the time I’m not sure you’re even alive.”

“Why the fuck wouldn’t I be? You’re just really annoying with all the messages, man. I have to actually sail and sleep sometimes, you know that, right?” 

He loved his brother, but sometimes he had an urge to strangle him. He heard Sam sighing loudly. Dean wasn’t the only one agitated, at least.

“You said you would update me. You didn’t. I have to check the AIS signal to know you didn't drown,” Sam said frustrated. 

“Well, I didn’t drown, as you can clearly tell by now. I’m entering the Kiel Canal. I’m on my way to see Bobby. And I have a friend helping me until then.”

Sam hesitated for a moment. “A friend? Who?”

“Remember I told you about a guy who showed me around a city in Gotland? That’s the friend, his name is Cas. When he finished with the boat delivery two days ago, he joined me on the Impala.”

“That's really nice of him.” Sam sounded like he wanted to say more and Dean suspected it wasn't pleasant.

“Okay, spit it out.”

“I'm just wondering, isn't it a bit unusual to randomly offer to join another person on their boat?”

The thing was, everything that had happened involving Cas had been unusual so far. That was the whole point. He was unique, handsome as fuck, a little bit strange, but at the same time incredibly funny. He was a walking encyclopedia, a skillful sailor, and a loving dad. And he couldn't get up without his coffee in the morning, apparently. All of it made Dean want to keep Cas close, but he sure as hell didn’t know how to explain it to his brother over the phone. Instead, he decided to just calm Sam down with some logical arguments that his brother loved so much.

“Well Sammy, I'm not gonna look a gift horse in the mouth now, am I? He hasn’t stabbed me and got rid of the body yet, and believe me, he had plenty of opportunities. He knows what he’s doing, the guy is experienced, so at least you don’t need to worry I’ll drown anymore.”

“Okay, Dean, if you say so. When will Bobby join you again?”

“Tomorrow.” Dean glanced at the companionway, where he saw Cas’s messy hair, then his whole, sleepy face emerging from below the deck. “Listen, Sammy, I’ve gotta go. I’m gonna send you a message when Bobby’s here, alright?”

“Right. But this time, really do it, Dean.”

“Yeah, okay. Bye.”

“Take care of yourself.”

Dean rolled his eyes, then hung up, watching Cas taking place on the bench next to him. He had his sailing, black trousers, and a long-sleeved, orange shirt on. He was barely awake, pressing his coffee mug to his chest like his life depended on it.

“Hello,” he heard from the other direction. Dean turned his head at the lady from before, who once again stood near to their stern, looking at Cas this time.

Cas looked up at her and smiled politely. “Hello,” he responded in his gravelly voice. The lady smiled sweetly. Dean suddenly felt irritated by her presence.

“I didn’t see you earlier,” she said, twirling her hair. She clearly changed the objects of her affection, forgetting about Dean's existence. 

“That’s quite understandable. I was below the deck,” Cas replied, then sipped from his mug.

“Right,” she giggled, Dean made a face. “I’m Katrin.”

“Nice to meet you. I’m Castiel.” Katrin’s eyes sparkled with interest. Dean wondered if he could throw her into the water by mistake. Cas glanced at Dean, lifting his eyebrow. Katrin must’ve realized she had to raise her game because she cleared her throat and tossed her hair back, capturing Cas's attention once more.

“Where are you sailing, Castiel?”

“Um,” Cas furrowed his brow, “we are sailing to Cuxhaven.” 

“Really? That’s interesting. Would you like some coffee?” Dean could be invisible at this point. Cas looked at Katrin strangely, then glanced at his mug and back at Dean, clearly looking for answers. Then, he squinted his eyes at Katrin.

“No, thank you. I’ve got one already.”

Dean coughed, holding back a laugh.

Katrin threw him a glare but quickly schooled her expression with a smile. “That’s a shame. If you want another one, you know where to find me,” she bit her lower lip and looked down, then back up. Finally, she turned around and waved at Cas right before she disappeared below her deck. Dean sighed, then turned his eyes at Cas, who was already looking back at him, his head tilted to the side. A smile flickered across his face.

“What?” Dean asked, suddenly nervous.

“I’m not sure yet,” Cas replied quietly and lifted his mug a little. “Thank you for the coffee, Dean. And for letting me sleep a bit longer.” He broke the intense eye contact and looked around. ”I can see we’re in the locking area already. How long ago did you drive us here?”

Dean glanced at his watch. “About 30 minutes, give or take?”

“Alright. We've got at least 30 more minutes. Let me prepare some breakfast then,” Cas smiled at him, then stood up and went below the deck. Dean discretely ogled his ass, since Cas couldn’t see him anyway.

When Cas disappeared into the kitchen area, Dean finished his coffee and unlocked his phone. He sent quick messages to Benny and Charlie, then started reading the notifications on his social media apps. Some girl had DM’ed him on Instagram, but Dean ignored it. Then, he moved on to his Facebook account, where he saw an interesting article about finding the right weather window. He was deep into it when he heard Cas calling him for the meal. Dean put his phone back in his pocket and marched below the deck. On both plates, he saw something suspiciously resembling scrambled eggs, with chives and everything. It smelled nice.

He glanced at Cas, deeply puzzled. “Why does it look like eggs?”

“It’s a disguise so you would eat it, Dean,” said Cas, his eyes amused. Dean frowned. “It’s tofu. You won’t die from it, I promise,” Cas assured him and hurried Dean to sit down. When he looked at the table, he saw hummus, neatly cut tomatoes, cucumbers, and green paste that could be guacamole. Dean waited for Cas to sit down too, then he took his fork and decided to start with a non-egg thingy. It turned out quite tasty, to his utter surprise. He had tried tofu once before (Sam’s idea), but it had tasted like an eraser. This, however, was rich in flavor and even resembled eggs a little. He looked up at Cas again, chewing through his bite.

“It’s called Tofu Scramble. I added nutritional yeast and black salt to it. Do you like it?”

Dean nodded, then swallowed and said, “I didn’t know you could cook something like this. You have to teach me how to do it.”

Cas smiled at him, then took his fork and focused on his plate. Dean tried the guacamole next. Cas had apparently made it from scratch, and it was delicious. He began to suspect that his brother might've been right about plants being not only edible, but also tasty.

Dean obviously couldn’t tell Sam that he had been right all along.

When they finished eating, Cas took care of their plates and Dean started putting everything back in the fridge and into the lockers. After a minute or two, he heard a noise from outside, so he left Cas with the dishes and went on the deck. Apparently, the water level had risen and they were allowed to enter the canal soon. He took a step back and put his head under the deck so Cas could hear him. “Will you help me sail out from here?” He asked.

“Alright,” Cas responded, then left the rest of the dirty dishes in the sink, wiped his hands with a kitchen towel, and hung it on the hook. Dean marched to the steering wheel and turned the engine on again, while Cas approached the German captain to get their lines. Dean glanced behind them, where Katrin already stood behind her steering wheel, and observed Cas’s movements like a hawk. He felt an unpleasant pang of jealousy. He looked at his hands, placed on the steering wheel.

What if Cas was straight? He didn’t seem interested in Katrin, but maybe Dean was wrong? Or maybe he had a girlfriend waiting for him in Visby. Would Dean be able to stay friends with him even if Cas had a partner?

What if he wanted to take that girl to Porto with him? What would Dean do then?

He looked up at Cas, who was currently preparing a looped spring line on the stern. Maybe he should just ask him if he had someone special in his life, after all? 

Cas turned his eyes at Dean and lifted his brow, taking Dean by surprise. Was he mind-reading again? Dean turned his gaze away, spooked.

“Dean, everything’s ready. We can move,” Cas said, narrowing his eyes.

Right. They were casting off. Dean nodded, then told Cas to drop the bow and stern lines and he put the shifter astern. The bow pointed in the direction of the canal.

“Remove the spring line, Cas.”

After it was dropped, Dean put the shifter ahead, causing Baby to drive forward. He had to focus on their surroundings since many vessels started moving at the same time and the area was currently quite crowded. Cas moved to the fenders, hiding them methodically into the lockers, then took care of the lines, tying them neatly.

Once they entered the canal, Dean tried to stay on the right side, letting the faster vessels overtake them. Meanwhile, Cas finished with the lines and sat back on the bench near Dean.

He looked up. “Something is troubling you,” he stated. “What is it, Dean?”

Dean glanced at Cas, then at the route again, his hands sweating. Worst case scenario, Cas was happily married to a beautiful woman and Dean was about to stay single, gloomy, and depressed. No big deal. He swallowed down a gulp.

“Dean, you look pale. Maybe you should sit down for a moment and let me drive?”

Grow a pair, Winchester. 

“Are you married?” The words came quickly out of Dean’s mouth.

“What?” Cas looked like he didn’t quite understand what Dean had said. He squinted his eyes at him and cocked his head to the side.

“I’m asking if you’re married, Cas.”

“I’m… what? Why do you think I’m married?” Cas asked, puzzled.

“I don’t, I just wanted to know.”

“Why?”

Yeah, why? Go on, tell him. 

“Well…” Dean began, frantically searching for any logical explanation that didn't involve his crush on Cas.

“Are you married?” Cas asked without waiting for a response, his eyebrow raised. 

“N-no! Why would I be?” Dean stuttered.

Cas started to smirk. “I don’t know, Dean. You asked me first.”

“That’s… well, yeah, I did. I was just curious,” he ended weakly. He was, once again, incredibly eloquent.

“Alright, then. I’m single.” 

Dean felt his heart pounding in excitement. Single. Cas was not only not married, but single. 

“What about you?” Cas asked, now visibly amused by Dean’s behavior. 

“I’m single, too,” Dean glanced nervously at Cas, who was openly grinning. “What?”

“I didn’t say anything,” Cas replied, playful sparks flickering in his eyes.

“Yeah, but you were thinking something.”

“As were you, Dean. Do you wish to share your thoughts with me?”

Dean very much didn’t, so he tightened his grasp on the steering wheel and shot his mouth, shaking his head. Cas snorted.

Okay, so at least there was no wife or girlfriend waiting for Castiel at home, which was, well…Something. Dean, however, still didn’t know if Cas was into men.

Baby steps, Dean. 

Truth be told, Dean wasn’t ready to even begin thinking about dating a guy. He would have absolutely no clue of what to do or how to behave, so the unclear situation wasn’t exactly the worst thing that could happen right now. On the other hand, waiting meant that someone could just snatch Cas away from him, and that was a truly disturbing thought.

He looked at Cas, who closed his eyes and basked in the morning sun. Dean didn’t even blame Katrin for trying to hit on the dude - if he wasn’t so hopeless and inexperienced, Dean would probably do the same. How was it even possible that with a face and body like that, Castiel was still single?

“I'm going to finish with the dishes. Do you want another coffee?” Cas’s voice once again snapped him out of his thoughts.

“Yeah, thanks, Cas,” Dean said, trying to think of something other than Cas's love life. 

Fifteen minutes later, his friend reemerged on the deck with two mugs.

“Let's switch. I can steer for a bit now,” Cas said, passing one of the coffees to him. Dean nodded while taking the mug, then handed over the steering wheel and sat on the bench. Cas put his mug into a holder and looked around.

Along the canal, they could see mostly trees, but from time to time they passed a marina, a city, or a high bridge. It was an interesting experience to observe the Impala's mast fitting under all of the constructions. From below it looked quite scary, but since all the bridges had a clearance of 42 meters and Baby’s mast was much shorter, there was no real danger of hitting the underside of the bridge.

Dean observed a few sailboats that had entered the canal at the same time when they had. One in particular caught his attention. It seemed that Katrin tried very hard to catch up with them, torturing her engine mercilessly in the process. Dean eyed the crazy lady for a while, then glanced at Cas. 

“It seems you’ve got some company.”

Castiel frowned, then turned his head to the left, where Katrin’s boat started to close the gap on the Impala. 

When she saw that Cas was steering Baby, she immediately started talking, evidently excited. She had to almost shout over the sound of the working engines.

“Castiel! I didn’t get to tell you that I will stay at Cuxhaven marina too. You can come and find me there.”

Cas’s mouth formed a nervous smile.

“Thank you,” he said, his voice a little too high, “...but I think I’ll pass.”

Katrin frowned but quickly smiled again. “If you change your mind, I’ll be waiting. Until later,” and then she winked and overtook them, straining her engine again. She once again didn't pay any attention to Dean. He winced, listening to the pitiful sounds made by the poor machine.

Cas sighed.

“She’s pretty and willing, you know,” said Dean. Why was he poking the bear, he was not sure.

“I know Dean, I have eyes and she’s quite obvious. I'm not interested.” 

“Why?” 

Cas looked at him again, irritation evident on his face. “She’s not my type,” he said dryly.

“Oh… okay,” Dean said quietly and took a sip from his mug.

Okay, so maybe Cas wasn’t interested in her specifically? Maybe he liked brunettes or whatever. 

Or maybe, just maybe, Cas liked men, just like Dean did. But that was just a guess, nothing more. Dean sighed, lost in thought again. 

“Dean?” Castiel said after a moment.

“Yeah?”

“If you didn't have to get back home so fast, where would you go next?”

“I'm not sure,” Dean looked at the sky thinking.” Maybe I’d sail to the North?” He looked back at Cas. “I've always wanted to see the northern lights.”

Cas nodded and smiled a little. “They are truly spectacular.”

“Have you seen them?”

Cas nodded again, then said, “do you think you'll be able to take another time off from work in the near future?”

“It might be impossible this year,” Dean started, looking at the water. “But I guess I could think of something for next summer.” He had basically abused his vacation days this year, and he wanted to take even more time off when Cas and Jack would visit him. Sailing like this in the near future was sadly not possible.

“I see. And the next year…” Cas hesitated, “would you be interested in a crew member? We could see the northern lights together.”

Dean looked at Cas with widened eyes. “Seriously? That would be awesome, Cas! But I thought you’re normally busy in the summer.”

Castiel smiled and nodded, then looked at Dean. “I could alter my plans. I can plan my work time differently. I would only need to know a few months prior when you would like to sail out.” 

Dean's heart started beating a little bit faster. “Does it mean you would sail with me from Porto, then?” 

“If you'd like.”

Dean smiled. “Yeah, man! I didn't think that was possible. We could see so many places together.” He frowned. “But what about Jack? Can we like, take him with us?”

Cas looked at him, surprised. “You want to take my son with us?”

“Well, duh? You can’t just leave him with his grandparents for that long, man.”

A warm smile lit up Cas's features. He glanced ahead, then back at Dean.

“I would have to ask him, but I’d love to take him with me.”

Dean nodded, satisfied. He imagined being on the boat with Cas and Jack for at least a month, cooking and eating with them, and just coexisting in Baby's enclosed space. It sounded like the best vacation ever. “We could go so much faster if we were together, and I really could use your help up North. I don't even have the charts for Norway yet,” he stopped, thinking. “Is it cold? I need to buy some clothes.”

Cas chuckled, a spark of excitement danced in his eyes. “It's a bit cold, but it's worth it. We only need to figure out when to start, then.” He glanced at Dean again. “Do you have clothes for skiing?” 

Dean shook his head.

“Clothes made for snow would be enough on a boat as well since normally they are warm and waterproof. A jacket, pants, and gloves would be sufficient, I think.”

“Wait, do you have clothes for skiing?” Dean asked, frowning.

“Yes, and the equipment. We ski every winter with Jack.”

Dean snorted, looking at Cas. “Is there something you cannot do, man?”

“I’ve been told before that I'm not great at social interactions.” 

Dean huffed. “By who?”

“My previous... partner.”

Dean rolled his eyes. “What a douchebag. You're fine, don't worry about it.” 

Cas gave him a sweet, small smile in return, then focused on their route again.

+

An hour later, Dean was sitting on the deck with his book. The clouds were lazily traveling through the sky and it started to get pretty hot, so both of them had stripped to their T-shirts. Dean glanced at Cas, who decided to wear another bee-themed one.

“What’s with you and the bees?” Dean finally asked.

Cas turned his gaze at him, one of his hands in his pocket, the other on the steering wheel. “I really like them. And they are essential to our survival. They're pollinators, so they allow plants to reproduce. Without them, the whole planet would die.”

Well of course Cas would be a bee nerd guy.

Dean had never really paid much attention to bees, but Cas was right - the little guys sounded important. Besides, Dean was pretty sure he’d be willing to listen to Cas while the guy read the vacuum cleaner user’s manual, and Dean would still be interested.

“Okay, fair enough,” Dean said, making Cas smile. “What?” He asked.

“You didn’t think it’s strange for a guy to like bees,” Cas stated.

“Why would I think it’s strange?” Dean asked, then suddenly became irritated. ”Wait, did somebody tell you that before?”

“You are correct.”

“Was it the same person who told you you’re bad at interacting with people?”

Cas shook his head slightly, amused by Dean's sudden fury.

“Dude, what kind of people do you actually hang out with?! You’ve gotta find some new friends!”

Cas smirked, then said, “I believe I’m currently working on it.”

Dean felt a blush creeping into his cheeks. He looked down. “Right, well. I don’t think it’s weird. You do you, man,” Dean said quietly.

“That’s very kind of you Dean, thank you.”

“S’nothing.”

Dean spent at least the next five minutes trying to deal with a warm, fuzzy feeling that was overwhelming him from the inside.

They methodically moved forward through the canal, leaving the next cities behind. After a while, Cas asked Dean to switch, then he marched below the deck, reemerging with a pair of sunglasses, a bowl full of apple pieces, and two bottles of water, handing one to Dean.

“Here. You need to stay hydrated,” he said, then sat on the bench with his legs up, sipping the water from time to time. Dean put his bottle into the holder and reached for an apple. It was juicy and sweet.

He was pretty sure he had never eaten so many plants in a row in his life.

Around 11 AM, they passed under an exceptionally tall bridge and the canal seemed to split in two. Dean had to ask Cas for help with navigating because he wasn't sure which route he should take. Cas only glanced at the canal from behind his book (he was reading some Swedish novel, Dean didn’t even know how to pronounce the name of it), and waved to the port side. 

It was starting to get really hot and Dean sipped from his water bottle from time to time. 

“I’d like us to video call Jack in a moment if that’s okay with you?” Cas asked after a while.

“Yeah, sure.”

Cas stood up, took his sunglasses off, and hung them on the front of his T-shirt, then placed himself next to Dean in the confined space behind the steering wheel. He then pulled his phone out of his pocket and tapped on it a few times, searching for Jack’s name on the list of his contacts. He extended his hand before them so Jack could see them both. Their shoulders were pressed together and Dean felt Cas’s body heat on his arm.

Finally, the boy with dark blond hair and impossibly blue eyes appeared on the screen.

“Dad!” He shouted, then looked to his left. “Is that Dean?”

“Hello, Jack. We wanted to see how you were doing. And yes, this is Dean,” Cas said with a smile. Jack moved closer to the screen so that only his blue eyes were visible. 

“Hi, bud!” Dean waved and chuckled, then glanced at their route again. “I think you need to move away from your phone a little.” 

“Oh, right. Sorry,” Jack repositioned himself so they could see his whole face again. “What happened to your cheeks?” He asked, tilting his head in a manner strikingly similar to Cas's own gesture.

Right, Jack could see his bruises. “Long story short, I had a problem at the sea. Your Dad came here to help me.”

“How are you, Jack?” Cas asked, getting his son’s attention.

“I’m good, but I’d like you to come home already. When will you come back, Dad?” 

Dean felt his stomach twist. Poor little guy missed his dad, and it was all because of Dean. “Listen, Jack, that’s actually all my fault Castiel is not home yet, I’m really sorry. But I have an idea how to repay you.” He glanced at Cas, seeking his permission. Cas nodded, smiling gently. “Would you like to visit me with your Dad in Portugal at the end of the summer?”

“Really?” Jack asked, grinning from ear to ear. “Can we go, Dad?”

Cas chuckled. “Yes, Jack. I think a little vacation would be good for both of us.”

“Yay! Do you have an animal, Dean?” 

Dean glanced at the screen. “No, sorry, kid. But uh, my brother has got a guinea pig, we can visit him and see the little furball if you want.”

Jack’s eyes went wide. “Woah! What’s it's name?”

“Uh, it’s Kate.”

“I’d like that, very much. You know, I’ve got a snake. His name is Felix.”

Dean gulped. He was not super fond of snakes. “That’s- that’s great. Is uh… Is Felix gonna travel with you guys?”

Cas snorted. Dean sent him an annoyed look.

“No, Dean, Felix stays with Jack’s grandparents when we travel,” Cas explained with a smirk.

“Right. Good. I mean, good for him,” Dean nodded with relief.

“What should I pack with me to Portugal, Dean?” Jack interjected.

“Um, a swimsuit, I guess? Maybe some games, if you’d like?”

“Do you have a PlayStation?”

Dean chuckled. “I do. You can play on it if you want, of course.”

Jack gasped. “This is awesome. Dad, when are we going?”

“I need to check the flights, Jack. I promise we’ll do it when I get back home, alright?”

“Okay. I can’t wait.”

“Jack, what's your favorite food? I’d like to be prepared before you guys arrive in a few weeks,” Dean said, trying to focus both on Jack and Impala’s safety.

“Um, I like cereal and nougat the most, but Dad doesn’t like it when I eat it.” 

Cas shook his head, smiling, then said to Dean “I told you he eats mainly sugar.”

“He’s a kid, give him a break,” Dean said quietly.

“But I eat vegetables and fruits too because I know it’s healthy,” Jack said, his voice a little sad.

"Okay, we'll make it work, Jack, you have my word," Dean said. Cas gave him a suspicious look. Dean shrugged. “I’m not going to poison him, relax dude.”

“Alright. Jack, are you behaving well?” Cas turned his attention back to his son.

“Of course, Dad, what did you expect?” Jack said bluntly. Dean chuckled. He was undoubtedly his father's son. And a growing, sassy teenager, for that matter. 

“Be nice. We’ll talk more when I get back, okay? Say hi to Grandma and Grandpa from me.”

“Okay Dad, see you later! Bye, Dean!”

“Bye, Jack.”

Cas disconnected the call, then glanced at Dean. “So you’re afraid of snakes?” 

Dean groaned. “You caught that, huh?”

Cas snorted. “It was hard not to.”

“I mean,” Dean started, “they don’t have legs, that’s disturbing. Who buys his kid a snake for a pet, anyway?” He finished, frowning.

“We didn’t buy Felix. He’s a rescue. Someone abandoned him on the street. Jack and his friend found him. The snake is quite old, actually.”

“Oh shit, dude. That’s fucked up. Who leaves their pet like that?” Even if it was a snake, leaving it to die alone was truly horrible.

“I don’t know, I don’t understand that either. Anyway, Felix has been with us for three years now, but I’m afraid he’s going to die soon. I’m not sure how Jack will take it.”

“Being a parent is not easy, huh?” Dean asked.

Cas sighed. “Not at all. Jack is actually begging me to get a cat, but I’m not sure about that. I don’t want it to just sit alone in the apartment all day while I have to work.”

“Yeah, I get that. I really wanted a dog but didn’t have the heart to leave it at home alone every day.” Cas nodded. Dean suddenly realized they were still standing really close to each other, neither of them moved since they ended the call with Jack. Dean cleared his throat, looking a the green bushes they were passing. 

“I can steer her now, Dean. You can rest for a moment,” Cas finally said. 

Dean nodded, then let his friend grab the steering wheel.

After a moment of silence, Dean, now sitting on the bench, said, “I assume the grandparents Jack stays with are not your mother and father?”

Cas turned his head in Dean’s direction. “No, they’re Kelly’s parents - that's Jack's mom. They offered to stay with him while I work.” 

Dean nodded, then asked, “So you’re spending all of the holidays with them?”

“Not really. Sometimes we do, but usually we just travel. Gabriel and the rest of my siblings visit us sometimes, too. What about you?”

“Well, Bobby usually visits us and we go to Sam’s and Eileen’s. She’s pregnant with their third child, so it’s kinda crowded there. It’s family and I love them. Even if sometimes they try to arrange my life to their liking.”

Cas chuckled. “I think I know what you mean.”

+

Two hours later, Cas asked if Dean wanted to switch or make lunch. “We need to establish who takes care of the eggplant, Dean,” Cas said with a smile flickering across his face. What was with this dude and eggplants, Dean wasn’t sure, but earlier he had found a recipe he'd wanted to check out, so they eventually switched.

He marched below the deck, leaving Cas in charge of steering the boat, then found all of the ingredients he needed and put them on the table. No waves in the canal meant cooking would be exceptionally easy. The day before, Dean'd had to constantly stabilize himself and fight with the boat movements to even stay vertical.

He peeled some potatoes, washed them, and placed them in a pot with a little water and salt to boil. Then, he chopped the eggplant and zucchini, salted them and sautéed in a frying pan, along with a few cloves of garlic. Following the instructions, he peeled the tomatoes, cut them into cubes, and added them to the mixture. As everything cooked, he seasoned the dish, tasting it from time to time. Once he was satisfied with the flavor, he turned off the burner and settled on the couch, patiently waiting for the potatoes. He pulled out his phone and checked the last message from Bobby, who had informed him that he should arrive in Cuxhaven the next day at 2:00 PM. He had also asked Dean about the leaks that Benny had reported, so Dean wrote him everything he knew so far. Then, he opened his weather app and started planning the next stages of the journey. He was pleased to discover that the wind should remain steady for at least a few more days.

With the potatoes finally ready, he divided the dish into two plates and went outside. He passed one of the plates to Cas, but his friend shook his head and said, "Eat first, please. We’ll switch in a moment.“ Dean nodded, then began eating, chewing happily.

“You've figured out what to do with an eggplant, I assume?” Cas asked, amused.

“I mean, It’s tasty, but I wouldn’t say it’s the best vegetable in the world,” Dean responded, not sure what was going on again. 

Cas snorted, “I don’t know, Dean. Maybe some day you’ll change your mind,” he said. Dean sent him a suspicious look, but eventually returned to his meal. When he finished, he stood up and went to the steering wheel, so Cas could eat too.

Castiel took his plate and sat down. “Well, it sure smells wonderful,” he said and put the first bite into his mouth. He groaned, closing his eyes, almost giving Dean a heart attack. After a moment he opened his eyes, smiled, and started nodding, “It’s great.”

“Glad you like it,” Dean said, smiling back, then focused on the route. “So um. Bobby said he’s gonna be in Cuxhaven tomorrow at 2 in the afternoon. I’m pretty sure I need to do some laundry before that,” he said. 

Cas nodded, then said, “I checked the flights from Hamburg, it seems I need to leave early in the morning to get there on time.” 

Although he had known it would eventually happen, Dean couldn’t help but feel a little bummed. He wouldn’t see Cas for a few weeks. On top of that, he had to get back to the office soon. He sighed, looking at the calm water around them.

“Dean?” Cas's voice brought him back from his misery.

“Yeah, Cas?”

“I’m really happy you decided to sail to Visby. That we could meet.”

Dean looked at Cas again, who was already smiling at him. So many things could have happened, one different decision during his trip and Dean wouldn't have met Cas at all. He was so close to turning back in Copenhagen, but for some reason, he didn’t. 

He smiled. “Yeah, me too,” he finally said, wondering if the warmth spreading through his bones, that had come with meeting his new friend, would still be present once Cas would come and visit him in a few weeks.

Eventually, Dean had to look back at the route, but he discovered he was in a much better mood than a moment ago.

+

When they finally reached the end of the Kiel Canal, the sun was already on the other side of the sky. It was Cas’s turn behind the steering wheel, so he was the one berthing in the locking area this time, while Dean took care of the fenders and lines. Fortunately, Katrin was nowhere to be seen.

The wait turned out to be much shorter than before, so half an hour later they finally left the canal behind them and pointed Baby’s bow towards the Wadden Sea. Once the trees were gone, it got a little colder, so Dean brought Cas and himself their fleece jackets from below the deck. 

By 7 PM they were finally ready to hoist the sails. The wind was blowing from the north at about 15 knots. Cas turned the Impala into the wind, then turned the autopilot on, while Dean moved to the lines of the mainsail, putting the halyard on the winch. Cas soon joined him, grabbing the line and pulling it with all his might. Operating the winch handle was a lot easier when somebody pulled the halyard, so very soon the whole mainsail went up, flapping in the wind. Dean moved to the jib sheet next, while Cas prepared to manage the furling line.

"Alright, let's go," Dean said, then tried to pull the jib sheet, but with no success. “Shit, not again,” he muttered, then let go of the line and attached himself to the jackstay. He turned his face to his friend. “Cas, I need to go to the bow, fucking furling drum is jammed. Can you pull the jib sheet when I give you a sign?”

Cas nodded, tossing the furling line down and moving to the jib sheet. Dean started to walk slowly towards the bow, clutching the guard rails for support. When he reached the furling drum, he grabbed it tightly, trying to rotate it. Finally, with some effort, he managed to move it. When he saw it was working again, he waved, giving Cas the signal to pull the sheet. The genoa unfurled itself and started flapping with the mainsail. Dean watched it for a moment, then moved in the direction of the cockpit again, while Cas directed Baby back on route, turned the engine off, and trimmed the sails. Baby heeled slightly and gained some speed.

“I need to repair it when I get back home,” Dean said when he finally reached the cockpit.

“Did it happen before?” Cas asked.

“Yeah, when I was sailing to Gotland. I tried to fix it once, but as you can see, it’s still broken.”

“Well, it’s quite common for furling drums to jam, but it can be dangerous, especially if you're sailing alone.”

Dean nodded, then sat on the bench, observing the sails for a while, then turned his head to Cas again. 

“It’s quiet without the engine. We could listen to some music. Do you know ‘Led Zeppelin’, Cas?”

“I know one or two of their songs.”

Dean winced. “That is unacceptable! It’s the best band in the whole world and you tell me you know two songs?” Cas snorted. “Don’t you dare laugh now, this is serious,” Dean said firmly, then stood up and went below the deck to plug his phone into the radio.

He probably knows ‘Black Dog’ or ‘Stairway to Heaven’, so let’s try something else. 

Dean tapped on the screen a few times, looking for the right playlist, then put the phone down and listened to the first chords of ‘Bron-Y-Aur Stomp’ flowing from the cockpit. He smiled, then turned around and went back outside.

When he sat down and started listening to the lyrics, he suddenly realized it was basically a love song, and he had just played it for Cas. He glanced at the guy nervously, but he didn’t see any signs of possible consternation on his friend’s face. After a moment, Dean relaxed and started tapping to the rhythm, then humming with the music, unable to sit still. When he heard the chorus, he couldn’t help but sing it out loud. He fucking loved that band. 

Cas smiled at Dean, entertained by his performance. When the song finished and ‘Whole Lotta Love’ started to play in the background, Cas said, “You should sing more, Dean. I really like listening to you.”

Dean smiled back, fighting the blush that had crept onto his face again. “Thanks, but that wasn't the point! Hush, I want you to know more of Zepp's songs.”

“Yes, I can see this is important. I’ll shut up now.”

They listened to the next few songs until the sun started to set right in front of them. The sky turned a beautiful orange, illuminating the water below. The Impala's sails were lit red, and the whole deck bathed in a warm glow. It was truly breathtaking. As Dean tried to take a photo, he heard the first chords of ‘The Rain Song’ coming from the speakers. He glanced at Cas, who was smiling softly at him, standing behind the steering wheel, one hand in his pocket. He looked stunning, with his eyes slightly crinkled and his hair messy. Dean felt his heart beating faster in his chest. 

He suddenly realized he was in deep trouble. There was a bond between him and Cas that had started forming when they had met and Dean had absolutely no way to stop it now. With every moment they spent together, Dean felt their connection spreading and taking root inside of his ribcage. He normally didn’t open up to other people so fast, but Cas had broken yet another of Dean’s ‘normals’. He wasn’t just some dude he had known for a few days. He was someone Dean wanted to spend more evenings like this with.

He turned back to the bow, unable to maintain intense eye contact any longer. The sun was now touching the horizon, slowly melting in the water.

“I think I’m starting to like Led Zeppelin, Dean,” Cas’s voice rumbled through the deck.

Dean smiled to himself. “Told you it’s the best band in the world.”

“I believe you.”

“Good.”

Dean remembered feeling lonely and lost during his sail to Copenhagen, not so many days ago. Now, he felt like the hole in his chest finally began to fill, drop by drop. He couldn’t say what the future would bring, but he hoped he would experience at least some of it with Cas, currently standing behind him and steering his beloved boat.

Chapter Text

As the sun dipped below the horizon, it started to get really chilly. They were getting close to the marina, so Dean decided to drop the sails and turn the engine on. It would take at least another 20 minutes to berth safely and he was already cold, so Cas went below the deck to get him a jacket and switch the navigation lights on. When he stepped outside again, he already had his blue and yellow jacket on.

Soon, they saw the harbor buoys in front of them. “Stay on the starboard side, Dean,” Cas said, preparing the lines and fenders. He had called out the harbormaster earlier, telling them complicated things in German, and getting some complicated words in return. He later announced that the Impala had permission to dock. He might as well have insulted Dean via the VHF. Dean wouldn’t know anyway.

Once they passed the buoys and drove into the harbor, Dean put the shifter slow ahead and started looking for the designated Y-berth. There wasn’t much room, so he had to be extra careful not to damage Baby or any of the other boats in the process. Finally, he decided to berth stern to the quay. Cas helped with the fenders and lines while Dean maneuvered between two other sailboats. When they put the last line on the cleat, Dean took a deep breath and glanced at his friend.

“Guess we’ve made it. Are you hungry, Cas?”

“I could eat,” he replied. 

“We can make sandwiches and watch a movie.” Dean looked around. ”I should take care of the fee first. Could you start with the food?”

Cas nodded and both of them moved below the deck. Cas stripped his jacket off and got to work, meanwhile, Dean found his documents and went back outside. When he was standing on the quay, he checked every line again, just to be sure Baby was safe. He had to go through a long platform to get to the harbormaster, but eventually, he entered the office. 

“Hi, I'm the captain of the Impala, we have just berthed,” Dean said to the guy sitting at the desk.

“Good evening. How long are you planning to stay?”

“One night for now. And I'd like to tank water and fuel. And do the laundry.”

They chatted a bit more, then the guy calculated Dean's fee and gave him some papers to sign. He instructed him where the bathroom and washing machines were, then explained where he should go to tank the oil. Dean thanked him and went outside again, returning to the Impala. The boat was now connected to the electricity, no doubt by Cas. When he stepped below the deck, Cas was in the middle of mixing something in a bowl. Dean curiously glanced over his friend's shoulder at the ingredients and, to his horror, spotted kale. It looked like something Dean would never eat, so he grimaced.

Cas rolled his eyes at him. “You should know by now I wouldn't make something disgusting and make you eat it, Dean.“

“But it's a salad! I'm not a rabbit!” He groaned.

Cas gave him an unimpressed look, then lifted one eyebrow. “You are going to try it, Dean. And you're going to like it, trust me.”

Dean gulped, feeling a shiver running down his spine. He nodded in defeat. Cas seemed satisfied by that, so he focused on the salad again and resumed his mixing. Dean turned around, unzipped his jacket, then shook it off and hung it on the hook. He came back to the kitchen area, washed his hands, and started helping with the sandwiches. They worked together for the next few minutes until all of the food was placed neatly on the table. Cas started looking for the beer that Dean had put in one of the cabinets but didn't remember which, and Dean moved to his cabin to get the laptop. When everything was ready, they sat comfortably on the couch, side by side. 

“I was wondering… Can we switch to something else tonight? The Lord of The Rings is a kid-friendly story, we could watch all three movies in one sitting with Jack when you guys come to Porto.”

Cas smiled at him sweetly. “Of course, Dean,” he said, making Dean's insides jump with joy. 

Dean nodded and began searching through his computer folders, finally finding what he was looking for. He put the laptop in front of them and started the movie. He tried to reach for a sandwich and a beer, but Cas handed him the plate with a salad on it.

“Try it, Dean,” he rumbled.

Dean eyed the kale suspiciously but eventually decided to do what Cas had said. The guy could be terrifying if he wanted to.

The first bite Dean took made him question everything he knew about salads. He’d been sure it would taste like grass. Instead, there was a rich, nutty flavor mixed with garlic and something else Dean didn’t recognize. It was a bit spicy, too. He swallowed, then looked at Cas again. “Okay, this is too good. Is it even a salad, man? 

Cas squinted at him. “I told you it is going to be good.”

“Yeah, but what’s inside?”

“Tahini dressing and avocado. Now shut up Dean, I’m trying to watch the movie you insisted I need to see,” Cas murmured quietly. Dean returned to munching on his suspiciously tasty kale and focused on the ‘Tombstone’. 

Three minutes in, Cas glanced at Dean and stated, “It is rather violent.” 

Dean laughed. “Yeah, Cas, it’s a Western. But wait, it gets better.”

Cas stayed focused for the rest of the movie, frowning from time to time, like he wasn’t sure what was going on. Dean found it endearing. They ate the sandwiches and sipped through their beer. Dean ate his second helping of salad, earning a grin from Cas in return.

As the credits began to roll some time later, Cas glanced at his watch - it was almost midnight.

“How did you like the movie?” Dean asked nervously.

Cas looked at him and smirked. “I’m willing to watch more Westerns with you, if that’s what you’re really asking,” he finally said. 

Dean smiled back. “Yeah?”

“Yes, Dean,” Cas nodded, then glanced at the table. “We should tidy up and get some rest. I’ve got a train to Hamburg at 5:20 in the morning.” He looked at Dean again. “Thank you for the evening.”

“Anytime, buddy,” Dean said and found himself mesmerized by the ocean blue of Cas’s eyes again. They sat for a while longer, maintaining prolonged eye contact. Castiel turned his gaze away first, then stood up and started clearing the table. Dean observed him for a moment, then decided to help, moving to the sink with the dirty plates. When they finished, Cas went to his cabin, taking his toiletries and a towel.

“I’m going to take a shower. Are you coming?”

Dean glanced at him again. “Nah, I’ll do it in the morning. I’m too beat.”

When Cas went outside, Dean pulled out his phone and set the alarm. He wrote a message to Charlie, Benny, and Sam, informing them he and Cas had reached Cuxhaven safely. Benny hadn't updated him on the leakings, so he probably didn’t have any new information worth sharing.

Dean suddenly felt very tired - he woke up before 5 AM, so it was quite understandable. He stood up and started undressing, then made his bed and lay down, his eyelids heavy. He tried to stay awake until Cas came back, but he dozed off eventually. He was startled awake by the opening door and soft footsteps. He lifted his head and looked at Cas, who was arranging things in his duffel bag.

“It’s nice to have you here, Cas,” Dean said smiling at his friend.

Cas turned his head to him, clearly surprised that Dean was awake. He smiled back softly. “I’m happy to be here.” 

“Y’know, I really hope we will sail together again,” Dean said, fighting with his eyes to stay open.

“We will. Go to sleep, Dean. You must be exhausted.”

Dean didn't have any strength to argue. “Okay. Night.”

Cas stood up, closed the door, and turned off the light. Dean slowly drifted back to sleep.

Just as he was on the verge of consciousness, he could swear he felt a warm hand on his cheek. He was probably already dreaming. 

+

Dean woke up slowly from an incredibly pleasant dream involving tanned, half-naked Cas in his cowboy hat. Dean couldn’t remember the details, except for the beautiful sunset, a tattoo of wings, and a black whip. He felt suspiciously well-rested.

When he opened his eyes and looked around he realized that Cas, as well as all of his things, were gone. He glanced at the clock - it was already 9 AM. He groaned. He must have slept through the alarm.

Dean sat down slowly and then stretched. He desperately needed fresh coffee. As he stood up, a piece of paper left on the table caught his attention.

“Dean, 

 I didn’t want to wake you, you need to rest before sailing out later today. Thank you for your company. I will gladly do it again, with you. Please, take care of yourself and keep me posted whenever you can. 

 Smooth sailing, 

 Cas 

 P.S. Raincheck on the pie? ”

Dean smiled, then sat down and read the note a few more times. He felt a warmth spreading through his body. He took his phone from his bed and opened the message thread with Cas. He started writing. 

“I just woke up and read your note. Thanks again for joining me. Hope your journey is bearable. I’m gonna call you from the next harbor. Say hi to Jack and stay in touch. And I’m always down for a pie.” 

Dude was probably in the plane by now, so he would read his message later. Dean stood up, took the note, and folded it carefully, placing it into the folder with his sailing documents. He ran his hand across his chin. He really needed to shave. He headed to the kitchen area and started preparing coffee, humming ‘The Rain Song’ under his breath.

+

At noon, Dean was freshly showered and shaved, his water and fuel tanks full and his laundry ready. He calculated that it would take them about 11 days to reach Porto, although this was highly dependent on the weather. 

Suddenly, his phone started vibrating in his pocket. When he pulled it out, he saw Bobby’s name on the screen. He picked it up.

“Hello?”

“I’m in Hamburg. Is the weather in Europe always this shitty or does it rain just to give me a warm welcome?”

Dean chuckled. It had started to rain an hour ago, but it should pass by the evening. 

“It looks like it’s just for you, Bobby. I’m in the marina in Cuxhaven. Give me a call when you reach it, I’m gonna go get you.”

“Alright. See you soon.”

Dean put his phone on the table and lay down on the couch, closing his eyes. He was going to see Cas in two months again. It was such a fucked up thing that they were living so damn far away from each other. If he only could, Dean would gladly spend every evening with Cas, just watching movies and talking. He sighed. Was it possible to change it somehow? Maybe they could find a way to see each other more often.

Eventually, Dean sat up, deciding to go shopping before Bobby got to the harbor. It was possible that the old man would demand to sail out straight away.

+

“What the fuck happened to yer face, you idjit?”

Dean once again forgot about the bruises on his face, which already looked much better than the previous day.

“Jib sheets slapped me. It’s nothin’ Bobby.”

“You look like shit, boy. It’s good I’m here. A few more days and you’d end up dead at the bottom of the sea.”

“How optimistic. Give me that.”

Dean reached for Bobby’s duffel bag, then marched with it through the platform in the direction of the Impala, Bobby following shortly after him.

“When did you get here?”

“Yesterday evening.”

“Are you ready to cast off, boy?”

“Yep.”

“Good. Lemme change and we can go”

“Don’t you wanna rest for a bit, Bobby?”

“I’m here to sail, Dean, not to rest. Get yer ass into the waterproof pants.”

Dean sighed. He missed Cas already.

+

“So what’s the deal with this friend who joined you?”

Dean glanced at Bobby, frowning. “Did Sam tell you that? Can’t he mind his own business for five fucking minutes?”

“Give him a break, Dean. You know damn well yer brother means no harm. He loves you and wants you to get back home safely.”

“Yeah, I get that, but the kid sticks his nose where it doesn’t belong.” Dean sighed, then looked at the water in front of them. They were underway for three hours, sails hoisted. He wasn’t planning to come out to Bobby just yet, but he knew It would happen eventually. It seemed now the occasion presented itself.

“I’d tell you about Cas either way. He’s kinda important in all of this.”

“All of what? Dean, I can see you have something on yer mind. What problem have you got yourself into now?”

Dean rolled his eyes. He decided to just rip off the Band-Aid. He looked at Bobby again.

“Okay, so here’s the thing. When I reached Gotland, I met a guy and we started talking. He was just…different, y’know? I started noticing stuff I’ve never really paid any attention to,“ he gulped but decided to just push forward. “A few days later I discovered that I’m- I’m attracted to him. I uh… I spoke with Charlie and she said some things that got me thinking. It turned out I like guys too, Bobby. I just wasn’t aware of it before I met Castiel.”

Dean looked down. Scary shit, he thought. Even though Dean was sure his dad wasn’t a bigot, he felt anxious about how Bobby would react. He had known Charlie liked women and he had never said anything bad about it, so that was something, at least.

Nothing happened for a few moments, and Dean was starting to get really nervous.

“Is that it? That’s why yer so jittery, boy?” Bobby finally asked, his voice amused. Dean glanced at him, deeply puzzled.

“What do you mean ‘is that it’?” He asked nervously.

Bobby chuckled. “Dean, yer my son, I’m gonna love you no matter what. And you’ve got nothing to be afraid of. Love whoever makes you happy. As long as they’re treatin’ you right, I’m on board.” 

Dean let out a breath he didn’t even register he was holding and smiled a little. “Thanks, Bobby. I really appreciate it.”

Bobby frowned at that. “What are you talking about? You don’t need to thank me. It’s yer damn right to do what you want with yer love life Dean, and it’s my role to support you as yer Daddy.”

Dean nodded, his smile growing wider. He was grateful to have Bobby in his life.

“Now, what about this Castiel? Sam told me he helped you a great deal.”

“Well, he came to Gedser when I had water in my tank. We sailed together to Cuxhaven. He did it without asking, he just thought I was in trouble and wanted to help. I uh… I think I really like him. I kinda invited him and his son to visit me in Porto in two months.”

Bobby nodded, his mouth tightened into a thin line. 

“Just be careful, Dean. You wear yer heart on yer sleeve. I don’t want you to get hurt.”

Dean looked at the ground again. The truth was, his emotions were beyond his control at this point. He never would’ve thought that in such a short time he could build a connection so profound as he already had with Castiel. It was impossible to explain and bizarre, really, but here he was, imagining cooking tofu with some dude from Sweden he had technically barely known. He couldn’t just say it all to Bobby without sounding like a complete lunatic, so he just nodded and said, “Yeah, okay.”

The sky began to clear soon after and the wind started to die away a bit. Bobby wanted to steer for now, so Dean decided to make them dinner. He considered cooking something vegan, but he was pretty sure Bobby somehow wouldn’t be as open to the idea as he had been to his bisexuality. He looked into the fridge, searching for some meat.

Half an hour later, he reemerged on the deck and passed one plate with steaming spaghetti to Bobby. The old man grunted “Thanks,” then switched the autopilot on and sat on the bench, digging in. Dean decided to do the same. 

After a moment of silence, Bobby said, ” We can try reaching Amsterdam in one go. It’s gonna take about 24 more hours. What do you think?”

“We can surely try. No heavy weather in the near future, so it’s possible we’ll make it.”

They remained eating. Bobby glanced his way a few times, so finally, Dean looked at him irritated.

“What?”

“I’m just curious how the hell did yer jib sheets beat the shit out of you, son.”

“It just got tangled in the shroud, the wind was pretty strong that day. Like I said, nothing serious.”

“Uh-huh. And what about the furling drum? Did you manage to repair it?”

“No, actually it got jammed again yesterday. Something’s definitely wrong with it. I did everything I could without removing it from the headstay.”

“I’ll take a look at it when we berth again. It’s possible it just broke, it’s pretty old, but let’s give it a chance,” he paused, then added, “Did you hear anything from Benny about those forty-nines that are leaking?”

“Nope, but I’d bet my money on rubber seals. I hope it’s nothing more serious, to be honest. What do you think?”

“I’d bet on the same, but I need to see it to be sure. What about possible leaks from the water tank?”

“No one told me whether the water in the bilge was fresh or salty, so I have no idea. Next time we talk on the phone, I'll ask Benny.”

After they finished eating, Dean took the dirty plates to the sink, while Bobby returned to the steering wheel. The next hour passed peacefully. Even with his brow furrowed, the old man looked like he was having a lot of fun, so Dean decided to let him steer Baby for now.

It was getting dark when Bobby finally agreed to switch.

“I’m gonna sleep for a while. Shout if something happens,” he said, then disappeared below the deck. Dean took the steering wheel and sighed, then glanced at the chartplotter. He could see other boats near Baby, but fortunately, none of them were on her route. He looked at the darkening sky. A few stars were already visible, but Dean couldn’t spot Arcturus yet. He smiled to himself, then shook his head. Cas was the first person who got him interested in stargazing. And in kale, for that matter.

I wonder what he’s doing right now. 

+

“Do you think we could see some castles in Portugal, Dad?”

Castiel sat at the table with a steaming mug of tea. A few minutes ago, he and Jack had started talking about visiting Dean in Portugal. The boy, currently standing by the table, was buzzing with excitement. Cas observed him for a moment, then said, “I think we should ask Dean first, but I believe it’s possible.”

“I would really like to see at least one. Oh! And I want to see the underground caves!”

“Okay Jack, we’ll see what we can do. The city Dean lives in is nice, too. Maybe we could find some interesting places to visit in Porto.” 

Jack smiled from ear to ear. “I’ve seen some nice places there. The city looks cool in the pictures,” he stopped for a moment, then sat on a chair beside Cas and declared, “I'm really happy we’re going.”

Castiel chuckled. “Yes, I can see that.” 

Jack moved Cas’s laptop closer to himself, undoubtedly to search for even more places he would like to see while visiting Portugal. Castiel took a sip from his mug, observing his son’s face. He was growing disturbingly fast. 

After Jack had been born, Castiel had decided to focus on his son’s happiness instead of actively seeking his own. After all, Jack depended on him from that moment on, so Castiel made every decision not only for himself but for Jack, too. 

Cas usually approached things strategically, thinking about every possible aspect beforehand. Now, he was almost ready to throw everything out the window, just because Dean had declared he wanted to see him again. The man he had just met.

From the very beginning, Castiel had suspected that Dean was just different, that everything Castiel had known couldn't apply here. Dean had surprised him more times than he could count already. He had treated Jack with nothing but respect and included him in their plans. He even had given Castiel a nickname almost instantly after they had met. 

Every time they had interacted, Cas had felt the pull from Dean, as if the gravity field had suddenly changed. Even though his instincts were screaming at him, he couldn't help but want to spend more time with the man.

He was, however, scared to drag Jack with him to Portugal. As a dad, he had to put his son before anyone else, even himself.

Jack’s voice snapped him out of his thoughts. “Dad, can you buy tickets already?” He sounded a little irritated.

Castiel focused on Jack’s blue eyes and his messy, dark blond hair. “Jack, are you sure you want to go? You don’t really know Dean, what if you won’t like him?”

Jack frowned like he wasn’t sure what Cas was even talking about. “But he seemed nice. And you like him, so why wouldn’t I?”

Cas raised an eyebrow. Jack’s answer took him by surprise. It was hard to argue with that. Besides, if everything went to shit, they could always just buy plane tickets and go back home, couldn’t they?

“You’re right. Maybe I should start listening to you more,” Castiel said, nodding, then reached for his laptop to search for flights to Porto.

+

The next evening, Dean knotted the last spring line on the cleat attached to the quay. He didn’t have time to check his phone yet, but it started vibrating like crazy as soon as he had had reception again. He pulled it out of his pocket and unlocked the screen - he had three messages from his backstabbing brother, a few from Charlie and Benny, one from Jo, and five from Cas. He tapped on the last name. The first two messages Cas had sent the day before.

4:43 PM, Cas - “I hope you’re well rested and that Bobby reached Cuxhaven safely. Jack says hi  👋😀”

10:13 PM, Cas - “I’ve booked a flight for the 26th of August. We’re going to arrive in Porto at 10:34 PM. I hope it’s not too late for you, but I’m afraid it’s the only flight available. ”

The next three had been sent this morning.

7:25 AM, Cas - “I’ve just arrived at the marina. The boat they gave me this time is really nice, I think you would like it. It’s got a TV.”

7:27 AM, Cas - “Baby is still more beautiful, of course. Don’t worry 😅 ”

8:30 AM, Cas - “My crew seems okay. I’m sailing out in a moment. I’m not sure when I will have a reception. I hope you’re well.”

Dean grinned. Of course, Cas would use emoticons.

He started typing the response.

“Bobby’s here. We’re in Amsterdam. I’m really happy you guys are coming, can’t wait to show you around Porto.”  After a moment, he added, “just so you know, there isn’t and never will be a boat more beautiful than Baby. ”

Cas and Jack would really visit him. He had to figure out some nice places for them to see. He could definitely take them to the treasure hunt through Porto, Jack seemed like a kid who’d love the idea.

“You look like yer in high spirits, boy,” Bobby said, coming on the deck.

“Yeah, Cas have just confirmed their flights. I need to think of nice, kid-friendly stuff to do in Porto,” Dean replied, looking up from his phone.

“Damn, you got it bad, huh? I haven’t seen you this happy since you fixed Impala’s engine for the first time,” Bobby said amused. Dean only glared at him, making Bobby roll his eyes. “Alright, don’t get yer panties in a twist. Let’s eat somethin’ and get some sleep. Maybe we’ll reach Calais next.”

Dean nodded, then opened the rest of his messages. He decided to communicate with Sam via texts for now, since he was still pretty mad at him for blabbing about the things he shouldn’t. He informed his brother, Charlie, Benny, and Jo of their location and plans to return to Porto. If everything went according to plan, he and Bobby should reach home in the last days of June.

+

A few days later, in the morning, Dean sat down on his bed and opened his phone. He wanted to check on Cas, but before he had an opportunity to write a message, his phone started vibrating. Dean grinned, then picked it up.

“Cas?”

“Hello, Dean. I saw you’re online. Where are you?” A deep, familiar voice rumbled through the speaker.

“Hey! I’ve just woken up. We’re in Calais, we’ve berthed at night. What about you?”

“I’m in Karlskrona, but we’re going to sail out in an hour or so. How’s the weather? Are you well rested?”

“Yeah, I’m good. The weather is fine so far, but there’s gonna be a storm in a few days. You need to watch out, too. Are you still planning to sail to Copenhagen?”

“Yes, although I’m not sure we’re going to sail there in those conditions. The wind’s going to change, but I’m sure you know this already. You will have to go upwind, and so will I.”

“I’ve seen it. I’d say it’s still better than no wind at all.”

“Hmm, you’ve certainly got a point," Cas mumbled, then added, "how is Bobby doing?”

Dean glanced in the direction of the old man’s cabin, the same one Cas had used before. 

“Give me a sec, I’m gonna go outside.”

Dean found his shoes, put them on, then opened the Impala’s door, stepping on the deck. It was sunny, but a little bit windy. He closed the door after him, then sat in the Impala’s cockpit.

”Yeah, so Bobby is as grumpy and energetic as ever. He tried to do something with this shitty furling drum, but just like me, he couldn’t find anything. He was so pissed. You should’ve heard him swearing over it, man. I couldn’t say a word because when I did, he immediately started shouting. I just stood there with a screwdriver and tried not to laugh.” He heard Cas snorting over the phone. “He wants to sail as fast as possible, so I’m betting the moment he wakes up, he’s going to order sailing out. I can tell he’s having the time of his life.”

“Well, that’s… refreshing.”

“Refreshing my ass. I feel like I’m fourteen again and doing everything too slow.”

“Well, you are hoisting a mainsail like my grandmother,” Cas said, deadly serious. Dean couldn’t help but laugh, Cas joining him soon after.

“Oh fuck you, Cas,” Dean said smiling widely.

After they calmed down a bit, Dean asked, “So, did Jack say something about visiting Porto?”

“Actually, he did. He found some places he’s interested in seeing and he wanted me to ask you if we could visit some castles and underground caves, I believe. I’m not sure what he is talking about.”

“Oh, yeah. Those are cool. Don’t worry, I’ll think of something. When I get back home, I can Facetime you guys and we could plan some stuff ahead.”

“Yes, I think that would be a good idea. Maybe it would calm Jack down a little bit. He’s really excited to visit you.”

“Yeah? And uh… And what about you?” Dean said before he could stop himself. 

Cas remained silent for a moment. Dean swallowed down a gulp. Why can’t he just shut up  sometimes?

Eventually, Cas responded, his voice amused, “I’m excited as well. Mainly for underground caves, but I guess seeing you is fine too.”

Dean snorted. “Gee, Cas. I didn’t know you’re so interested in the holes in the ground, but I’ll keep that in mind. And don't forget about the movie nights you’re going to participate in.”

“How could I, you won't let me,” Cas said dryly, causing Dean to only laugh more. He heard Cas’s chuckle through the speaker.

“How's this nice boat you're sailing doing, Cas?”

“Well, she's quite comfortable. She's 45 feet. But there is an in-mast furling system, which I hate.”

Dean knew those kinds of furled mainsails were easy to hoist and drop, but they weren't performing as efficiently as the classic ones.

“I hear you. I don’t like the idea either. And how many people have you got on board?”

“Six. Two of them are experienced sailors.”

“Neat. At least you don't have to do everything by yourself. Will you be able to wait out the storm in Copenhagen?”

“Yes, if it comes to that. I hope you're planning to wait it out too.”

“Yeah, I am. I've had enough storm experience for one week.”

“Speaking of, how's your face and knees, Dean?”

“Better. The bruises are almost gone.”

“Good. Don’t strain yourself.” Dean nodded, suddenly remembering that Cas couldn’t see him, “yeah,” he said.

“I'm afraid I need to go in a moment, my crew is almost ready to sail out.”

“Okay, Cas. Thanks for calling, man.”

“Of course, Dean. Stay safe.”

“Yeah, you too.”

Dean put the phone away, then stretched, raising his hands above his head. He was still a little bit tired and sore from last night's sailing. Bobby pushed forward relentlessly and didn't want to hear about any longer-than-necessary rest stops. 

Dean glanced at the fuel gauge which clearly indicated they needed to tank again. He had to take a shower before they sailed out, too. He sighed, then stood up and went below the deck to grab his toiletries and a towel.

+

The storm hit when they were safely docked in the French city Cherbourg-en-Cotentin. It started slowly with the appearance of angry, dark clouds forming over the horizon. Next came the distant sounds of thunder, rumbling through the windless, hot, and sticky air around them. When the first gusts of wind and rain hit the Impala’s hull, Dean closed the door from the inside and lay down on his bed with a book. Apparently, Cas had managed to reach Copenhagen and was currently exploring it with his crew. He was safe too, much to Dean's relief.

Dean focused on ‘The Odyssey’, which turned out to be a super fucking tragic story. He started to feel really sorry for Odysseus, who just wanted to go home to his family. It was a Greek tale, so of course it was sad, but Dean couldn’t figure out why Cas liked it so much. He managed to read for about an hour before the falling rain lulled him to sleep.

+

“Trim the jib sheet, boy!” Bobby shouted through the noise of rain and rough sea. Wind had changed to the northwest some time ago and they had to tack. Dean grabbed the winch handle and installed it in a winch in one swift movement, then started to turn with all his strength. The rain hit him violently on the face. 

Since they had sailed from Cherbourg-en-Cotentin, the rain hadn’t stopped for even a second.

When he adjusted the jib, Dean put the winch handle away and moved closer to Bobby, so the old man would hear him better.

“In the next harbor, we need to rest for a few more hours. We need to get everything dry, at least. Even my spare clothes are soaked now.”

Bobby muttered something in response, but Dean couldn't hear him through all the layers of clothes he was wearing. He opened his mouth again, “C’mon Bobby, we’ve got time, nobody expects us to be back until Sunday.”

“Alright, alright, stop whining. We’ll stay in Brest a little longer,” Bobby shouted back.

Dean took a deep breath. Bobby was one stubborn sonofabitch if he wanted to.

“Do you want some tea?” He asked loudly.

“Make me a coffee, Son.”

+

When they entered the marina in Brest, the sky finally began to clear. Dean berthed Baby to the quay in almost the same spot as those few weeks ago, when he had met Bella. It felt like a lifetime ago, so much had changed since then.

Bobby took his wet clothes outside and started to hang them on the rigging. Dean decided to do the same, starting with the jacket he still had on. When he unzipped it and took it off his shoulders, he heard a whistle from behind. He turned around, frowning. 

“The older of the Winchester brothers himself! Incredible.” He heard a rough voice. Not so far away, on the quay, clothed in all black, stood their kinda-new agent named Crowley. Sam had found the Brit a few months ago, declaring they “need to advertise the business somehow, Dean”. Crowley was unpleasant and sly, but he certainly got the job done, so as long as Dean didn't have to spend too much time with him, he agreed to hire the guy. However, Dean trusted him only as far as he could throw him.

“Crowley,” Dean said, nodding in a greeting. Bobby straightened himself and joined Dean in the cockpit.

“And the father of the business himself is here as well, I see. It’s a pleasure.”

Bobby nodded too. As far as Dean knew, he didn’t like Crowley either.

“What are you doin’ here, Crowley?” Bobby asked.

“Just some business appointments. You are not my only clients, you know?” Crowley responded in a heavy British accent. “The real question is, what are you two doing here, on a boat, instead of you know - working?” He asked, looking very pleased with himself.

“Since I’m technically your boss, I don’t see why I should explain myself to you, but If you must know, we’re on vacation,” Dean responded, clenching his fists. Crowley possessed some skills in pissing Dean off in almost no time. Where the fuck had Sam found the guy exactly?

Crowley smirked. “Again? I must say, Dean, your dedication to work is admirable. You know, we need to have a little chat, you and I, about your brand visibility. I can see that you haven't placed your logo on your beloved boat yet?”

Dean rolled his eyes. He had tried really hard to separate his personal life from his work, so a long time ago he had decided to not put a company name on Baby’s hull. When Crowley had found out about it, he had started pushing to change Dean’s mind.

“No, and I’ve told you I won’t do it, so just drop it.”

“No need to get angry, Dean. It’s your company, not mine, so the decision is fully yours. I’m only here to help,” he said smoothly, then glanced at the expensive watch on his wrist. “I’m afraid I’m needed elsewhere. Have a nice day, gentlemen,” then Crowley turned around and marched in the other direction. Dean huffed.

“Why did you hire him again?” Bobby asked, frowning.

“Dunno, ask Sammy.”

Dean’s phone decided to start vibrating at that very moment, so Dean pulled it out of his pocket and picked it up.

Speak of the devil.

“Hiya, Sam.”

“Hey. How is it going?”

“We’re in Brest and you won’t guess who we’ve just bumped into. Crowley’s here.”

“What is he doing in France?”

“Hell if I know. I still hate him, just so you know. Anyway, how are things back home?” 

Sam hesitated. “That’s…actually why I’m calling. Do you know when you’ll get to Porto?”

“Yeah, we need about six more days. Why?”

“I didn’t want to worry you before, but now you’re coming back anyway, so I guess it’s better you know about that. A few of our 49-foot sailboats were reported leaking. Benny can’t seem to find the reason.”

It looked like Sam had finally decided to come clean.

“Yeah, okay. How many are we talking about?” Asked Dean in a calm voice.

“At least five, for now. The water in the bilge was spotted in every one of them.” 

Five, two more than before, then. 

“Do you know if the water is fresh or salty?” Dean asked, deciding Benny had probably informed Sam about this detail as well.

“Uh…” Dean heard a rustle of paper. “Salty and dirty. It’s from outside, then?” Sam asked.

“It sure looks like it. Alright, Sam. Don’t worry, we’re on our way. Bobby’s here so we’re gonna figure something out.”

“Yeah, alright. I’m glad you’re coming home, Dean.” The relief in Sam’s voice was evident. Despite being an adult, his brother sometimes sounded like the little kid he once used to be. 

“Hold on tight, Sammy. See you soon.”

When Dean put his phone away and turned around, he was met by Bobby's expectant gaze.

“So the bad news is, Sam says there are five leaking boats now. The good news is, the water in the bilge is from the outside, so we need to check the windows first.”

Bobby slowly nodded. “It seems like it’s the smartest move. Alright, let’s get something to eat. We’re gonna rest today, but tomorrow we’re gonna sail right through the Bay of Biscay, no stopping, you hear me, boy?”

Since there was no point in arguing with his old man, Dean only nodded and unlocked the phone to check his messages. The last one from Cas had been sent this morning.

His friend informed him he had sailed out from Copenhagen and was headed to Bornholm Island.

Dean had never had a friend like that, he thought. It seemed different with Benny - they were mostly talking about work, anyway. Charlie was like a sister to him, but she had never taken an interest in sailing.

Cas, however, was a sailor, and a good one at that. It was nice to just have someone to share your progress with. Someone who understood and loved sailing as much as Dean.

He focused on his phone again, informing Cas he would probably have no reception for at least two days. Fortunately, the weather was expected to stay pleasant, and there was a good chance they would sail beam-reach all the way. It was also quite possible they needed only two more stops before reaching Porto. 

As they were getting closer to home, Dean started to feel really anxious about going back to work. When he had sailed out from Porto, he had decided to not open his work email at all until he was back. He suspected now he would have to spend all day just reading all the work messages that had reached his inbox during his absence. He ran a hand across his face, wondering if there was any way to get away from that. 

“Stop sulking and let’s look for something decent to eat, boy,” Bobby’s voice snapped him out of his thoughts.

“Right, just let me get my wet things outside and we can go.”

+

As Dean predicted, they had sailed peacefully through the Bay of Biscay. In fact, it had been so peaceful, that Dean had managed to end up reading the Odyssey while lying on the deck. He was happy to discover that Odysseus got back home at the end, even if it took him fuck knows how long.

They had stopped in A Coruña city after almost three days of sailing, but, anticipating a change in the wind, Bobby ordered them to sail out again at 6 the next morning. Despite feeling exhausted, Dean obeyed, knowing it wouldn't help if the wind died down completely.

When he checked his messages, he found out that Cas had managed to get back home and would have a few days off.

Finally, at 11:00 PM on the 30th of June they saw the harbor lights in Ribeira, the very first marina Dean had planned to enter while sailing the other way. He would laugh if he wasn’t so worn out with fatigue.

At midnight, they finally turned the Impala’s engine off.

“That’s our last harbor before Porto. Do you want some beer?” Bobby asked, rubbing his weary eyes. 

“Yeah, I think we should still have two bottles from Amsterdam hidden somewhere. Let me check,” Dean replied, walking below the deck. Soon, he found the locker he had put the alcohol in, taking the two last bottles out. He went back on the deck and passed one beer to Bobby. 

“Thanks. Good work, Dean. Y'know, yer still not a half-bad sailor,” he said, sipping the beer. Dean smiled at him.

“Thanks, Bobby. I had a really good teacher.”

Bobby smiled back and sipped from his bottle. Then, he said, “So uh... are you gonna tell yer brother about this Castiel boy?”

Dean looked down at his hands. He had to tell Sam something, but he still wasn’t sure what exactly it should be. It was pretty scary just to announce to everybody he was bisexual now, but to straight up admit he had a crush on a guy who would visit him with his son almost sent Dean into panic mode.

“I think I’ll just come out to him, for now. I don’t want him to say some stupid shit to Cas or Jack during their visit," he said, then winced. "I didn’t tell you this earlier, but uh…I don’t actually know if Castiel is into men. I don’t want to scare him away.”

“Hmm…” Bobby rumbled. “I can see why yer afraid.”

“It would be safer to just keep Sam in the dark about the details of the whole Cas situation, at least for now. I mean, I’m gonna tell him eventually, but I’d rather do it after Cas goes back home,” Dean finished.

“I hear you, boy. Don’t worry, he ain’t gonna know from me.”

Dean nodded and smiled a little. They sat in silence for a while, sipping from their bottles. Dean could slowly feel the fatigue taking over him. 

“Alright. Let’s take a shower and catch a few hours of sleep,” Bobby said, standing up. Dean nodded, then stood up as well and pulled out his phone. “Yeah, you go first. I’m gonna inform Sam we’ll be home by the evening.”

When Bobby vanished below the deck, Dean opened his message thread with Cas. It looked like his friend was online, but it was almost midnight, so Dean decided to text him instead of calling.

“Hiya Cas, we’ve just reached Ribeira.”

He didn’t have to wait long for a reply.

“Hello, Dean. It’s good to hear you’re safe. How was the passage through the Bay of Biscay ?”

“Peaceful, fortunately. I even managed to finish the Odyssey. I’m actually kinda scared now, gonna go back to work soon.” 

“I’m waiting for the review, then😀. I don’t want to go back to work, either. I’m currently packing my bag. I’m sailing out tomorrow morning,” Cas replied.

“Where to this time? ”

“Helsinki.”

“Well, you’re gonna see some nice places at least. All I’m gonna see is my full inbox of unread work emails and the inside of my office.”

“But you’re going to reunite with your family and friends, too.”

Dean actually forgot for a moment that Cas had to leave Jack at home every time he went sailing. No wonder he had mentioned Dean’s family since he had to leave his own behind.

“That’s true. But hey, you’re gonna see Jack in no time, too.”

Cas didn’t reply straight away and Dean started getting a little nervous. Finally, Cas wrote, “It’s starting to weigh on me, leaving him at home like that.”

Dean read the last message a few times. It wasn’t strange that Cas felt bad leaving Jack time and time again with somebody else, even if the people Jack had stayed with were his family.

“This sucks. I’m really sorry,” was all he could think of as a reply. What else could he say? If he had a kid, he was sure he wouldn’t be so eager to just leave them for a week or two, either.

“Thank you, Dean. I’m afraid I need to go in a moment. I need to get up early.”

“Sure thing, Cas. Keep in touch.”

“I will.”

Dean closed his message thread with Cas, then tapped on his brother’s name and sent him a text informing him of their planned arrival. He didn't want a crowd on the quay tomorrow, especially since he knew that by the end of the day, he and Bobby would be pretty damn tired. He decided to meet with Charlie and Benny at work on Monday.

+

When they finally passed the first set of buoys in Porto the next day, it was almost 8 PM. The sailing had been really pleasant for most of the journey, but obviously, the furling drum had decided to jam again. Dean started to worry he would actually have to take off the whole headsail to repair the damn thing.

When he drove into the Marina da Afurada, he saw his brother’s tall figure, standing by Baby’s usual spot on the quay. Very pregnant Eileen and the kids, currently shouting and running behind his brother’s back, came to greet them too. Dean glanced at Bobby, who smiled and waved to his brother. Sam immediately waved back, grinning from ear to ear.

When the fenders on Baby’s port side touched the quay, Sam and Bobby worked together to secure the boat properly with all of the lines. Meanwhile, Dean turned the engine off and patted the steering wheel lovingly.

Quite a journey indeed.

Chapter Text

When Dean hugged everyone at least twice, he left Bobby with Eileen and the kids, taking his brother below the deck of the Impala - he needed his help with moving all the stuff from the boat to the car. Earlier, Dean had put the rest of the food that was left into the boxes, so it would be easier to take it all away. 

Sam entered Baby and looked around curiously. 

“Can you take care of the food? I’m gonna take our bags outside,” Dean said, stuffing the last things into his duffel bag. He and Bobby had also packed during the day so they wouldn’t have to stay on the boat for too long.

“Sure thing,” Sam muttered, moving to the boxes. “So uh…are you ready to go to work tomorrow? You can always take a day off if you need,” he said, undoubtedly aiming for casual.

Dean glanced at his brother. “I think I had too many of those lately. Nah, what I need is to take care of those leaks, man. The sooner we do it, the better.”

Sam nodded, looking at his feet. When he glanced back up, Dean saw his big, puppy eyes exposed. His brother wanted to talk about feelings, no doubt. “But I don't want you to feel trapped again,” he finally said.

Yeah, Dean wasn’t gonna get home without giving Sam at least something. He was too tired to dive into it now, but he had actually planned to talk with Sam about their working arrangement anyway. He thought about what Cas had said to him that day when he had come to Gedser. Sooner or later, Dean had to face the truth - he had been miserable in the office and some changes were long overdue. He sighed. 

“I know, I uh… I actually think we need to sit down and talk about it. Just… not right now, Sammy. I'm too beat.”

“You? Want to talk?” Sam asked, disbelief clear in his voice. 

“Yeah. Now can you put the food in my trunk?” Dean said, tossing Sam the keys to his car. Sam caught them mid-air and nodded once, finally marching outside.

Dean looked around, searching for any possible stuff he might’ve forgotten, then took both of the duffle bags on the deck. Bobby was in the middle of chasing DJ through the quay with Mary on his shoulders.

Dean stopped before Eileen, who was sitting on the bench, and turned his head so she could clearly see his lips. He was learning sign language for some time now but still didn’t know all the words.

“How are you feeling?” He asked, signing the words he knew. She was due in September.

She patted her round belly, then said, “Good. The little one is kicking like crazy.”

Dean smiled. No one other than Sam and Eileen knew the baby's gender, but they had decided to keep it a secret.

“It means it’s a little, feisty Winchester, sister. Does Sam massage your feet regularly? I’m gonna kick his ass if he doesn’t.”

Eileen laughed. Pregnancy looked really good on her. 

“He’s doing what he’s supposed to, don’t worry. Does Bobby stay with you or with us?”

“We need to ask him, I don’t know yet. Hey Bobby!” Dean turned his head to his old man. ”Where do you want to sleep?”

Bobby stopped the chase, then approached the bench and faced Eileen, putting little Mary down. “Dean’s spare bedroom, at least today,” he said.

DJ chose this moment to bump into Dean’s right leg. “Uncle Dean!” 

Dean turned around and picked the shrieking boy up. The kid started kicking his legs, giggling loudly.

“Yes, you little monster?” Dean asked the boy.

“Are you gonna visit us today?”

“Me and grandpa need to rest for a bit, bud.”

“I was thinking that we could all get together for dinner tomorrow. We’ll prepare something at our place,” Eileen interjected, then added, “We could invite Charlie, Benny, and Andrea, too.”

“Yeah, that’s actually a good idea. We can meet you after work,” Dean said, then addressed DJ, still sitting in his arms. “Is that okay, bud?”

“Are we gonna get presents?”

Dean chuckled. “Yes, you’re gonna get presents, alright.”

The boy nodded, looking pleased, then demanded that Dean put him down. When he was on the grass again, he skipped cheerfully in the direction of approaching Sam. In the meantime, little Mary hid behind her mom, observing the situation. When Dean waved to her, she giggled but hid her face behind Eileen’s dress. She was in the phase of being extremely shy, so Dean decided to give her some space. 

Sam stopped next to his wife and looked at Dean, handing him the keys. 

“I think you’re set, Dean. I put all of the food in the trunk,” he said. When he was with Eileen, Sam always signed when he was talking.

“Thanks, Sammy. We decided Bobby’s going with me, but we’ll visit you guys tomorrow.”

Sam nodded, then picked his daughter up and glanced at Dean. “I need you at the office in the morning. We’ve got a meeting at 9 AM.”

Dean groaned. He despised meetings of all sorts. “What about the leaking boats, man?” He asked, attempting to reason with his brother.

Sam shot him an irritated look. “The meeting is important, too. You can go to the hangar after we finish. Bobby will start without you. Right, Bobby?”

Bobby just shrugged, clearly deciding to stay out of this.

“Okay guys, we’re going back home,” Sam said. Dean tried to shake Mary’s hand, but this time she hid her face in Sam’s jacket. Sam glanced at Mary. ”Will you say ‘bye’ to Uncle Dean and Bobby?” The girl shook her head. Dean pouted, making Eileen giggle. 

“I will!” DJ shouted and hugged Bobby’s legs. “Bye, Grandpa!” He exclaimed, then moved to Dean’s legs, squeezing mercilessly, “Bye, Uncle Dean!”

Dean grimaced but patted the boy's head.

“Yeah, okay, that’s enough, superman.”

Sam took his son’s hand and led him to their car, little Mary still in his arms. He had to bend down so DJ would reach his palm - it was truly adorable. Eileen turned around and waved, then followed her husband.

When they vanished in their car, Dean looked at Bobby, handing him the keys to the Mustang.

“I need to go back to Baby and double-check everything. Can you wait in the car?”

“Okay, but hurry up,” Bobby grumbled, then took his duffel bag and went in the direction of the parking lot.

Dean went back to Baby's cockpit and checked every fender and line, then marched below the deck to turn off the electronics and shut off the gas valve. He looked around again. It was hard to believe he won’t be sleeping here tonight, after so many weeks of sailing. He had meant what he had told Cas, the Impala was the closest place to a home he’d ever had. 

Finally, he turned around and went outside, closing the door behind him. On his way to the car, he picked up his duffel bag, already thinking about the repairs he should do on Baby soon.

In the parking lot, he almost immediately spotted his black, ‘67 Ford Mustang. Dean had actually considered buying the original ‘67 Chevrolet Impala a few times, but he couldn’t shake the feeling he would cheat on his Baby. There was only room in his heart for one Impala, he thought.

When he approached the car, he saw Bobby already sitting in the passenger’s seat. He opened the driver’s door.

“You took yer sweet time. Let’s go kid. I’m beat,” Bobby said.

“Yeah, yeah,” Dean grunted, sitting down, then put the key in the ignition.

+

Ten minutes later Dean pulled into his garage and got out of the car, moving to the trunk. Bobby took the boxes with food, while Dean pulled out both of their duffle bags. He fortunately had found his keys earlier so he wouldn't have to rummage through his bag now. In a swift movement, he closed the trunk, walked to his front door, and opened it, letting Bobby first. Once inside, Dean hung the keys to his car, boat, and home on the hook. The keys to Baby still had the keychain he had bought with Cas on Christiansø.

His home wasn’t far from the marina. The Douro River could be seen from every window of the flat - Dean liked to stay near the water. It was a two-story apartment with two bedrooms, one small office room, and an open kitchen. In the central space of the living room stood a big, custom-made table. It was made of olive wood and epoxy resin, which resembled ocean waves. It was Dean’s favorite piece of furniture, just because he could easily gather his entire family here.

Besides, it looked cool as fuck.

When he had bought the flat, he had basically left Charlie in charge of choosing the colors of walls and floors. His only request had been to use wood and stone on as many surfaces as possible. Charlie had picked light wood flooring and had helped with the furniture and details. Dean hadn’t had many requirements for his interior, other than finding a good place for his gramophone - now standing next to the navy blue sofa - and his vinyl collection, which had been neatly arranged on a built-in shelf under the stairs.

The spacious living room was filled with soft sunlight coming through the massive window that took up half of the wall. The light illuminated the Led Zeppelin posters, hung on the wall behind his couch.

The apartment was clean and smelled fresh, just as Dean had left it.

Bobby moved to the kitchen space on their left and placed the boxes on the wooden countertop, then turned around.

“I’m gonna order us a pizza,” Dean said, too worn out to cook. Bobby nodded. “Make yourself at home, Bobby. You know where everything is, anyway,” Dean spoke again and pulled out his phone to call a local pizzeria.

+

When the last slice of pizza was gone, Dean took the empty boxes, stood up from the couch, and marched to the kitchen area.

“What time do you have to show up at work, boy?” Bobby asked from behind, while Dean was trying to squash the boxes so they would fit in the bin.

“9 AM.”

“I’m gonna go with you, then. The sooner I start with those damn boats, the better.”

“Yeah, sounds smart,” Dean nodded, then turned around. “Alright. I think I’m gonna hit the hay.”

Bobby grumbled a goodnight and Dean left him in the living room, going up the stairs. He walked straight into his bedroom and removed his duffel bag from his bed. He would have to do the laundry soon, he thought. He moved to the closet, searching for a clean pair of underwear and a T-shirt, then went to the bathroom and undressed himself.

He looked in the mirror hanging above the stone sink. The bruises on his face had vanished completely a week earlier, but his hair became long again - it was definitely time for a haircut. He had also lost some weight, but the muscles in his arms and back were more visible than before. He still felt a dull pain in his knees, which indicated he should probably visit a doctor or something. He wasn't getting any younger, was he?

Dean entered the open shower and turned the water on, stepping under the stream. When he closed his eyes, he could still feel the pleasant motion of the boat beneath him. 

He had never liked coming back home from sailing. He loved the routine of life on a sailboat, its simplicity. He already missed the sound of waves surrounding him and the smell of the wood below the deck. He would probably be able to visit the marina during the weekend and check on Baby.

Once Dean had scrubbed himself, he turned off the water and stepped out of the shower, leaving wet footprints on the gray tiles. He grabbed a towel and dried himself, then put on his underwear and T-shirt. Finally, he returned to the bedroom, turned off the light, and lay down on the bed, unlocking his phone. Cas hadn’t sent him any new messages, but he might have been still underway. Dean started typing.

“We’re home. It's so weird, lying in a normal bed, man. Nothing creaks or splashes. Not even sure I can fall asleep like this.”

After a moment, he added:

“Hope you’re safe and all.”

+

The next morning Dean woke up disoriented with no idea where he was. He patted the bed to find his phone and turn off the alarm. When he finally managed to locate it, he remembered that he and Bobby had actually returned to Porto yesterday. He glanced at his phone. He had two new messages from Cas. 

1:03 AM, Cas - “Hello, Dean. I’ve just berthed safely. I’m glad you’re okay and hope you will get some sleep, after all. We’re staying in Fiskargränd for the night ⛵” 

1:04 AM, Cas - “I’m planning to sail out at 2 PM 😉”

Dean smiled softly at the screen. He would be able to call Cas during his lunch break. He started typing.

“Hiya Cas. Gettin’ ready for work now, but I’ll call you later if that’s okay.”

When he finished, Dean put the phone away and took a deep breath. It was time to face real life.

+

“Dean!”

He heard her before he saw her and somehow managed to catch Charlie before she knocked him to the ground in front of the office building.

“Sonofabitch,” Dean said, his heart hammering loudly in his chest. “You scared the shit out of me, Charles.”

“Why didn't you say you'd come back today?!” She shouted in his ear, still hanging around his neck. Dean winced.

“Sorry, we were both exhausted,” he choked out. “Charlie, you’re gonna strangle me.” 

“Oh, sorry,” she said and finally released her death grip. “It’s so good to see you dude, I’ve missed you so much! We need to catch up, like, yesterday. Are you free today?”

“No, and neither are you. We’re both going to Sam’s and Eileen’s. They invited us all to dinner,” Dean said, straightening his suit. For some reason known only to his brother, he had to look professional. 

“Oh, that's nice! I haven’t seen Eileen in a while. Are you gonna, you know…” she raised her eyebrow.

“What?” He asked, frowning.

“Y’know… tell them?”

“Ooh…” Dean nodded slowly. “Y-yeah. But I don’t want to mention Cas yet. I still don’t know if he’s, y’know.”

“Yeah, okay. I’m gonna play along, don’t worry. You’ve got my full support,” she smiled and patted him on the back.

“Thanks. And I missed you too, you have no idea.”

They entered the building together and stopped in front of the desk, where the security staff checked the ID. 

“Hello, Charlie! And Dean! Nice to have you back. How was your trip?” Asked Jody, their head of security. A young woman Dean didn't know sat to her right.

“Hiya, Jody. It’s good to see you. Believe it or not, I miss the sea already.” He glanced at the girl and smiled politely.

“This is Alex, my daughter,” Jody said, looking at the girl. She couldn’t be older than 18.

“Good morning, Mr. Winchester,” Alex said.

“Please, call me Dean,” he shook the girl’s hand. “Are you gonna work with us, Alex?”

“I’m not sure yet. I’m here on probation,” she said shyly.

“Well, I’m sure Jody will tell you everything you need to know. She's the best security guard we could ever ask for,” he said, then added, “but don't tell that to Donna. She's great too. And please don't hesitate to contact me or Sam if you have a problem, we will try to help.”

Once they finally passed the security desk and stood in front of the elevators, Charlie spoke again.

“Dorothy would love to meet you, dude. We need to like, do a movie marathon together,” Charlie said. Dean suddenly remembered his movie nights with Cas and a warm feeling spread through his body.

“Dean?”

“What? Oh, yeah. Yeah, I’d like to meet her too.” 

Charlie eyed him suspiciously but eventually started talking about her last date with Dorothy. Dean was glad that she had found someone she cared for. His friend was incredible and she deserved only good things, Dean thought.

Since she worked on the floor below Dean, she got out of the elevator faster. "I'll go with you to Sam, so wait for me when you're done here," she said before the elevator doors closed.

When it reopened a moment later, Dean came out and walked across the boring, gray carpet, greeting the employees. He glanced at his watch. It seemed he still had five more minutes to the business meeting. He wasn’t even sure what it was about, and he didn’t really care since his priority was the leaks. When he finally managed to sit down in the conference room, Dean pulled out his phone and looked at the last message he got from Cas:

8:53 AM, Cas - “Of course. I’m looking forward to it."

Under the message, Cas had sent him a selfie of himself wearing sunglasses and smiling. He looked as handsome as ever.

“Aren’t you in high spirits today, cher?” Dean heard his friend’s amused voice to his right. He looked up and smiled at Benny as he stood up.

“That’s because I’m seeing you, obviously!” They greeted each other with a friendly hug. “How are you?” Dean asked.

“Same old, same old. I heard from your brother we'll have dinner together tonight?”

“Yeah. Is Andrea coming too?”

“I’m not sure yet. She’s a little tired lately. Are you ready to get back to work?”

“I’m ready to take care of those leaks, that’s for sure. Sam said I have to be here in the morning, but I’d rather go to the hangar.” 

Benny chuckled. “I know what you mean. It’s good to have you back, Dean. I’m tired of wearing suits all the time.”

Dean nodded in agreement. He knew that Benny didn't like working in the office either.

Other people began to enter the room, so they both sat down and fell silent. Soon, Sammy came too and walked over to the chair next to Dean, sitting down. He put a stack of papers in front of him.

“Hey. How are you feeling?” He asked Dean quietly.

“I’m fine. Why do you need me here, again?”

Sam huffed. “Stop being a child, Dean,” he said, then started flipping through the pages before him.

The meeting was started by some chick from the financial department. Dean was almost sure her name was Mildred. He couldn’t focus on the numbers so he soon got lost in his thoughts. 20 minutes later he unlocked his phone again and started typing a message to Cas.

“I swear my brother is punishing me with this meeting. It’s soooo boring.”

Cas responded almost immediately. “ What is it about? And why would he punish you?🤨"

“I have no fucking clue what it is about, that’s the point. He wants me to die of boredom. I suspect he’s angry that I left him here to run the company. ”

“You’re ridiculous, you know that? ” Dean actually heard Cas’s amused voice in his head and almost snorted, but managed to control himself. Suddenly, he felt Sam’s elbow poking him in the ribs. He wanted to shoot Sam an irritated look, but when he looked up he saw everyone in the room looking at him expectantly. Mildred wasn’t the one speaking anymore. Another chick, who Dean didn’t know, stood in front of him with a raised eyebrow. He felt his pulse rising. 

“Uh…” he said, glancing at Sam for help. Sam rolled his eyes.

“Miss Johnson asked you about the budget for yacht construction this year,” his brother finally said, showing mercy.

“What about it?” Dean asked the lady in front of him. She smiled sweetly.

“Mr. Winchester, you seem to choose quite expensive materials for all your projects. It generates high costs. Your income could be much higher if you’d only changed your standards.”

Dean frowned. “Well, the sailboats we build are safe and of good quality. Everybody knows that. That’s kind of the point.”

She glanced at Dean’s lips, then tossed her hair back. “That's true, but your competition had started lowering their standards some time ago. Yachts sold by Germans are already 15 % cheaper than yours."

Sam decided to interject. “The high quality of our vessels is something that my brother and I are proud of. We are not really interested in compromising the quality of the materials, Miss Johnson, at least for now."

“I understand, but I’m afraid, in the face of the upcoming economic crisis, you should at least consider changing the suppliers of your components. My company will send you proposals in this matter. I’d strongly advise you to expand your options and discuss it again,” she said, smirking at Dean, then she finally sat down.

Dean frowned at her, then focused on his phone. 

“I’ve just found out what this meeting is about. Some chick wants us to use cheaper materials to build the boats. Like that’s gonna happen,” he wrote.

“Why? ” Cas responded.

“'Cause it’s cheaper. She said the Germans are doing it already. Sure, let’s just use styrofoam and toothpicks and call it a day.”

“That’s disturbing. Isn’t it obvious that the safer the boat, the more expensive the materials?”

“My thoughts exactly, Cas.” 

The meeting ended shortly after. As everyone began to file out of the room, the Johnson lady walked over to Dean’s seat and leaned against the table.

“I hope you’re not angry at me, Mr. Winchester. I’m just doing my job.”

Dean stood up and smiled politely. “Not at all. I’m doing my job too, Miss Johnson.”

“Please, call me Shaylene. If you require some further assistance, please let me know,” she winked at him and placed her card on the table in front of him as she left the room. Dean glanced at the piece of paper with distaste. If Shaylene thought he would fall for her cheap tricks, she was clearly delusional. He looked at Benny, who was watching him with amusement.

“What are you laughing at?” Dean asked him, irritated.

His friend shrugged. “Absolutely nothin’. Are you going to the hangar?”

“I guess.” Dean looked at his brother to ask if he needed him in the office, but when he turned his head, Sam was already watching him with a frown.

“What?” Dean asked, glaring at Sam. Why was everybody acting suspicious today?

“Are you okay, Dean?”

“What are you talking about? I said I’m fine. Do you need me here or can I actually do something useful now?”

Sam huffed again, then shook his head and said “unbelievable” under his breath. “Alright. The dinner’s at six,” he finally said. Dean almost ran out of the conference room before his brother could change his mind.

+

Two of the leaking boats were currently docked at the quay and Dean was crouching in the bilge for at least 30 minutes now. Bobby was checking the deck of the other boat, but he hadn’t found anything yet. 

Once Dean had finally changed into his working clothes, he immediately started to feel better. He couldn’t find any obvious fractures or defects, so he eventually moved to the windows. Benny had said they had checked the rubber seals twice, but Dean had a strong feeling something was not right with them.

“Hey, Ed?” He shouted. A head appeared in the companionway.

“Yeah?”

“Pour some water over the forward hatch for me, would you?”

“Aye aye.”

Dean observed the water through the window for a moment, but it didn’t leak at all. He sighed, then pulled out his phone. It was almost noon.

“Alright. It’s time for a lunch break, Ed,” he shouted, then sat on the couch below the deck. He called Cas, who picked up almost immediately.

“Hello, Dean,” Cas’s deep voice welcomed him. Dean smiled.

“Hiya Cas. How is it going?”

He heard Cas taking a big breath. “Half of my current crew vomited on our way here, so I’m a little bit tired.”

“Oh shit. Was it that windy?”

“Not at all. It happens sometimes, but I’m afraid we won’t reach Helsinki, after all.”

“Yeah, it would be dangerous for them and for you. Damn, I hope you’re gonna be okay.”

Cas didn't respond right away. Dean waited patiently. “Don’t worry about me, Dean. This is not, as they say, my first rodeo," Cas finally rumbled through the speaker.

Dean was suddenly assaulted by a vision of Cas riding a mechanical bull, wearing his cowboy hat. He almost choked on his tongue.

“Y-yeah,” he responded weakly.

“How is the work going?” Cas asked.

Dean cleared his throat. “Not great. We’re trying to find the fucking leaks, but I can’t see anything. It’s like the water just magically appears in the bilge, y’know?”

“It sounds like you have quite a terrible day.”

“It really does, doesn’t it?” Dean chuckled and ran his hand over his face.

“Did you check the heel of the mast?” Cas asked after a moment.

“We did, but that’s not it. I have a feeling it’s the windows, man.”

“Well, you’re the expert here. I wish I could help you in some way.” 

Dean felt the flutter in his stomach. “You already are,” he said quietly, then added. “It’s uh… it’s really nice to, y’know. Talk. I mean, with you.” Dean stuttered. 

“I like talking to you too, Dean,” Cas answered after a beat. ”It’s not so lonely anymore.”

Dean had been thinking about it too. Cas's presence in his life had already changed a lot, but he started to notice that they had simply understood each other on a different level. He felt like he could tell Cas almost anything and wouldn't be judged for it. 

“You’re right,” Dean said quietly, smiling to himself.

“So, what did you think of the Odyssey, Dean?” Cas asked after a moment of comfortable silence.

“Oh man, it’s tragically sad. Do you want to tell me you actually read it for fun?”

He heard Cas chuckle. “Well, I never said it was a happy story. However, it has a happy ending.”

“Cas, this dude angered like every other deity he met. Do you really expect me to be happy that he didn’t die at the end?”

“Well, but he didn’t. And he came home, eventually. I would like to remind you that ‘The Tombstone’ started and ended with horrible deaths, but you still like it.” Cas said, amused.

“Okay, when you put it like that...” Dean muttered. “Anyway, when are you heading back home, Cas?”

“Saturday. But I’m sailing out again on Sunday.”

“What? Why?”

“Another captain canceled apparently. Somebody has to take over the boat and the crew.”

“Man, this sucks.”

Cas sighed. “It really does. Sadly, it’s not the first time it happened. I might have to speak with my boss. I should have at least one day off in between.”

“Yeah, it’s like they don’t get that you need to rest, too.”

Cas hummed in agreement. Dean suddenly saw a movement in the companionway. When he turned his gaze that way, he saw Bobby’s head.

“Dean, you’ve got to see this,” he said, then disappeared.

“Shit, I need to go, Bobby wants me to see something. Listen, uh… You’re damn good at what you do, Cas. Every employer would be happy to have you. They sure as hell shouldn't treat you like that.”

“Thank you, Dean. That’s… really kind,” Cas said after a moment, his voice warm.

“I’m only stating a fact, man. Okay, gotta go. I’ll talk to you soon. Take care of yourself.”

“Hmm… You too. Have a nice rest of the day, at least.”

“Thanks, Cas.” Dean smiled, then hung up and put his phone away.

When he stepped on the deck, he saw Bobby standing in front of the windows in the middle of the boat. They were quite small and didn’t even open. He had a bucket with water in his hands.

“Go below the deck again and see if it's leaking, boy,” he said. Dean nodded, then turned around and did what he was told. When Bobby poured the liquid on the window, Dean saw a trickle of water dripping down the laminate inside. He frowned. 

“What the…” he said, then closely examined the window. A moment later Bobby joined him below the deck. 

“You were right about the leaking windows, but the problem is not the rubber seals. I think it’s the glue. We have to dismantle the windows and glue them back on,” Bobby said.

“Shit. Yeah, it looks like you’re right. Okay, I’m gonna inform Benny,” Dean said, then looked at Bobby. “Well, at least we know what’s wrong now. I need to check which glue we used.” He tapped at the window a few times.

“Alright, but we should eat something first, boy. C’mon, let’s get us some lunch.”

+

During the rest of the day, Dean managed to check the plans thoroughly and instruct his employees on how to fix the defects. Fortunately, a few years prior they’d got rid of the glue they had used, so there was no real danger that the problem would appear in different sailboats, too.

Dean worked in the hangar until Bobby came to remind him about the dinner at Sam’s. Once he changed into jeans and a T-shirt, he met Charlie and Bobby by the Mustang at 5:30 PM and they hit the road together. 

When they finally reached Sam’s house in the other part of the town, Dean got out of the car and marched to the trunk to get the presents he had bought for everyone. Then, he moved to the front door, letting Charlie and Bobby first into the spacious, bright corridor. Two little figures almost immediately appeared beside them.

“Charlie!” DJ shouted, then he threw himself on his friend’s neck. Charlie giggled, hugging the boy. In the meantime, Mary took Bobby’s hand and guided him to the living room. Dean followed after them with all the bags. Eileen was sitting on the cream couch while Sam was putting the big pot in the middle of their wooden table.

“Hello, guys,” he said, smiling. “Sit down, dinner is almost ready.”

Dean walked to Eileen to greet her. Behind him, DJ and Charlie entered the room.

“Do you need any help, Sammy?” Dean asked, catching DJ just before he hit his legs, most likely in an attempt at the next, violent hug.

“Nah. Make yourself comfortable,” his brother said, then left the room. Dean sat down on the carpet and began handing out the gifts, starting with little Mary, who received a mermaid doll with a beautiful, shiny blue tail. Dean had bought a Lego Millennium Falcon set for Charlie (who cried a little) and a Lightning McQueen RC car for DJ, who demanded to test it immediately. He handed Eileen a set of Celtic earrings he had purchased in Visby and a tiny Viking-style jumpsuit for the little one. On the way back, Dean had even managed to buy his brother some fancy French wine.

He still couldn't bring himself to feel bad about the whisky he and Cas had downed in Kiel.

A short time later, the front door opened again and the children ran out into the hall, this time to assault Benny.

When the dinner was ready, they all sat by the table and started eating the stew prepared by Sam. For a few minutes, only the clinking of forks was audible.

“So you found the source of the leaks?” Sam asked after a while.

“Yeah. It’s taken care of, boy. It could’ve been much worse,” Bobby said between the bites.

“That’s true. I can’t believe I didn’t think of the glue sooner,” Benny interjected, shaking his head.

Once DJ and Mary ate a little, Eileen allowed them to take their new toys and play in their room. Dean and Benny took care of the dishes while Sam offered a glass of wine to his guests.

Surrounded by the chatter of his family, Dean felt warm and at peace. 

“How’s Andrea feeling?” Eileen asked Benny when the pie was finally brought to the table. Dean glanced at his friend. “Something’s wrong with her?” He asked, frowning.

Benny chuckled. “Nah. She’s just experiencing the natural side effects of pregnancy, I guess.”

“Woah, man! Congratulations!” Dean said, smiling broadly, then stood up and hugged Benny. He knew that they had been trying to have a baby for some time.

“Thanks, cher. We’re over the moon.”

“I bet. If you need anything, you know where to find me,” Dean said, then sat back down.

“So, what did you think of the meeting, Dean?” Benny said after a moment, smirking.

Dean swallowed a piece of pie he was chewing and frowned. “What do you mean? We’re not gonna change the materials for the worse, I thought we all agreed on that,” he said.

Benny looked at him strangely, then glanced at Sam. Dean eyed them suspiciously.

“I mean, we certainly agreed on the materials, Dean. There is no way lowering our quality would be good for us. But that’s not what I was askin’, really,” Benny responded, amused. 

“What were you asking, then?” Dean was deeply puzzled by the whole conversation.

“Dean,” Sam interjected, grinning. “Benny’s asking about Shaylene.”

“Who?” Dean asked, even more irritated.

“Miss Johnson? You know, the lady who flirted with you for the whole meeting? That one?” Sam huffed in disbelief. 

Oh, that Shaylene. 

“Yeah. What about her?” Dean asked again, frowning.

“Are you gonna, you know, meet with her?” Sam asked, his brows furrowed.

“No? Why would I?”

Sam opened his mouth, but nothing came out, then frowned and glanced at Benny, who shrugged.

Dean observed them for a moment. He knew that a few months back he wouldn't have hesitated - Shaylene was pretty and willing. But the thing was, Dean hadn’t even thought about her once today after leaving the conference room.

“The pie is great, Eileen,” Bobby suddenly interjected from the couch. Dean sent him a grateful look.

“O-kay!” Charlie said, chuckling nervously. ”Tell us something about Denmark and Sweden, Dean. The pictures you sent me were beautiful.”

“Uh… Yeah. I mean, I didn’t actually see so much, but the places I’ve been to were stunning. There was this town in Gotland, with so many ruins and old buildings…” Dean’s mind drifted to Cas’s ocean eyes. “Really beautiful,” he ended quietly, looking out the window.

Sam’s voice snapped him out of his thoughts.

“Dean, are you alright?” You seem… I don’t know. Different.” 

Dean looked around. Benny studied his pie intensely and Charlie tried to down her glass of wine. Only Bobby looked at him calmly, with his arms folded. Dean finally met Eileen’s and Sam’s concerned gaze. His hands started to sweat. He was different, there was no doubt about that. He just wasn’t sure how to admit it out loud to his whole family. He could hear his heart throbbing loudly.

Deep down, he knew that the people sitting at that table loved him and would probably support him, no matter what. He was really lucky in this department since plenty of LGBTQ+ people didn’t share the same fate, experiencing rejection, discrimination, or even abuse from their own family members. It didn’t, however, change the fact that Dean felt scared that he wouldn’t be understood. He glanced at Charlie again, who gave him a reassuring smile. He felt her hand on his, squeezing him gently under the table.

“Yeah, I know,” he said quietly. This part required some serious bravery from him. He sighed. “I actually need to tell you something,” he finally said. “Bobby and Charlie know this already. It's…. it’s probably gonna sound unbelievable, but I need you to understand I’m still figuring everything out. I uh… realized something while I was away.” He smiled a little, then looked at his plate.

Here we go. 

“I’m… I’m attracted to both women and men,” he said quickly before he could change his mind. He stopped for a moment, but when nothing scary happened, Dean continued. “I’m bisexual. I had no idea about it until now. It’s uh… still pretty new to me, too.” When he finished and mustered his courage, he glanced at Eileen, who was smiling warmly at him. Then he looked at his brother, who was clearly in some kind of a shock.

“Shit,” Sam said after a moment. “I didn’t expect that.” Dean felt a wave of fear traveling through his body. However, before he started to panic, Sam pulled out his wallet and took 50 euros out of it, passing it to Charlie, who took it smirking. Benny chuckled. Dean frowned.

“Did you just… Did you bet on my sexuality with Sam?!” He asked Charlie in disbelief.

Charlie grimaced. “Yeah… sorry! But it was his idea,” she responded, pointing at Sam, who huffed.

“Traitor,” he said, squinting at Charlie, then he looked back at Dean. “Dude, I was sure I was going to win this. We bet like, three years ago!”

“Unbelievable,” Dean said, glancing between his friend and his brother. 

“I’m soooooryyyy Dean, we shouldn’t have done such a thing,” Charlie whined. Sam started to look unsure and apologetic as well.

To be honest, Dean found the whole idea quite funny, but he was determined to let them suffer for a little bit. They deserved it, he decided. When he couldn’t contain his laughter any longer, he finally snorted, causing the rest of the table to follow suit.

After a moment, Sam spoke again. “Dean, I uh… I want you to know that we love you. I know it was probably scary to tell us all that. You’ve got my full support.” Dean nodded once, then glanced at Eileen, who signed “I love you” to him in ASL. “Same here, brother,” Benny said, patting him on the shoulder. Charlie squeezed his hand under the table again. Dean smiled at them and muttered “thanks” quietly, then looked down, trying to get a hold of his emotions.

+

Once the pie was gone, Bobby and Benny dove into a heated discussion on the subject of the beam and the draft of the new sailboats, while Charlie interrogated Eileen about the upcoming baby shower. Dean decided to sneak out to the kid's room, where Sam found him half an hour later, drawing mermaid princesses with Mary. His brother sat down next to him without a word and started sketching his own princess. 

“So how do you feel?” he asked after a moment.

Dean glanced at him, then focused on Ariel’s red hair again. “Dunno. It’s weird, I guess. I’m questioning everything I thought I knew about myself. Are you using the blue crayon?” 

Sam shook his head, passing the color to Dean. The table they were sitting at was super small and his brother looked like a giant troll. 

“I’m glad you told us, Dean,” Sam said after he colored his princess's dress yellow and orange. Dean smiled at him and nodded, then glanced critically at his brother’s work. Dean’s princess looked a lot better, he thought.

“Dude, why did you use yellow?” Dean asked.

Sam frowned at him. “Because that’s Belle from ‘Beauty and the Beast’. Her dress is yellow.”

Dean squinted at the drawing. The princess looked like she had spent the last three days drunk under a bridge. 

“If you say so,” he muttered, then reached for blue glitter to add some finishing touches to his mermaid.

“Daddy, but why is she so sad?” Mary asked, looking at Sam’s insult to all fairy tales. Dean snorted, causing Sam to roll his eyes at him.

“She’s not sad, honey,” Sam responded, smiling at his confused daughter. ”She’s just uh…”

“...on a bender,” Dean muttered under his breath.

“Dean!” Sam hissed. Dean rolled his eyes at him.

“Dad, what’s a bender?” DJ asked from behind them. Sam’s eyes went wide, then he gave Dean his bitch face.

“There you are!” They suddenly heard Charlie’s voice coming from the hall. Dean looked at his friend, relieved. “I’m afraid I need to go, guys,” she said.

“Yeah, me too,” Dean said quickly, then stood up, ignoring Sam's protests. One of his knees creaked. He winced but straightened himself, determined to flee away from his brother's anger.

Back in the living room, he found Bobby and Benny in the exact same place where they were before he left.

“Okay, let’s roll Bobby,” he announced. 

Benny looked at his watch. “I believe I have to go, too.”

Soon, the whole group came out into the corridor and exchanged hugs. Even Sam hugged Dean at the end - he still looked annoyed, though.

“Thanks for the family dinner again, guys,” Dean said, his eyes shifting between his brother and Eileen before he stepped out of the house. 

“Don’t mention it,” Sam said with a smile. Dean nodded once, then followed Charlie and Bobby to his car.

+

Over the next few days, Bobby took over the team responsible for repairing the leaking windows. Meanwhile, Dean managed to answer all of his emails and start working on a new sailboat design they planned to release soon. On Thursday, his old man announced that he wanted to spend a few days with his grandchildren, so in the evening they moved all his things to Sam's. When Dean got home at 10 PM, he realized he was alone for the first time in days. For a moment, he was tempted to check on Baby, but finally decided he would wait until next week for Bobby’s and Benny’s help with the furling drum.

He sat on his couch with a beer and unlocked his phone, but didn’t find any new messages from Cas. His friend had contacted him only once since Monday, informing him that almost all of his crew had been vomiting, so he'd had to stay alert. Dean was seriously worried, especially since the weather in the area Cas was currently sailing at, was rather rough. Dean also somehow forgot to ask Cas what was the name of the sailboat, so he had no way to check his AIS signal. Frustrated, Dean switched the TV on, but couldn’t bring himself to focus on the movie's plot at all.

What if something bad happened to him?   

He knew it was stupid since Cas was an experienced sailor, but the anxiety he felt in his chest kept growing with every passing minute. He took a sip of his beer, then glanced at his phone again.

It remained frustratingly silent for the rest of the evening. 

Sometime after midnight he gave up and dragged himself to bed. He couldn't concentrate on the movie anyway.

+

Dean was sitting behind his desk, trying hard to focus on the budget, but the numbers on the screen refused to cooperate. He sighed, then looked out his office window, observing the white sails of boats visible in the distance. Throughout the day, he had found himself periodically checking the weather app for updates on the wind strength in the Baltic Sea. He had also left Cas about half a dozen messages asking him to call as soon as he had reception.

Yeah, he was acting super crazy again. 

When Sam visited him at noon with pizza, Dean was resting his head on the desk. 

“Wow, you look like you didn’t get a wink of sleep,” Sam said when Dean finally raised his head. Dean nodded weakly, then muttered “Rough night,” and stood up, walking to the couch. Sam placed the box of pizza on the coffee table and took a slice. Dean sat down and reached for a slice as well. He wasn’t particularly hungry, but since he'd missed breakfast, he decided it would be smart if he ate something now, at least.

Sam studied him for a moment, chewing, then swallowed and asked, “So, you wanted to talk about work arrangements?”

Dean glanced at him. “Yeah. I’ve been thinking about it for a while now, Sammy. I’m not great with all the business meetings and documents and… uh… stuff.” Sam shot him an unimpressed look, but Dean continued. “Don’t get me wrong, I don’t want to leave you alone in all this, either. It’s just that when we started the business, I was mostly building boats, y’know? That’s what I’m really good at, man. Besides, you’re gonna need some time off when the little one shows up here, right?”

“Alright, I hear you,” Sam finally said. “What do you suggest?”

“Well, for starters, maybe we could assign someone else to do the Excel sheets?” 

Sam shook his head. “But you can't just expect anyone to do such a responsible task. It requires checking if the plans you create meet the budget, Dean. Benny hates it as much as you do and I’ve got enough on my plate already. Besides, Andrea is pregnant, too. Benny is going to need some time to adjust as well.”

“Yeah. Maybe we should like, promote somebody from the financial department? They are trained in Excel sheets, right?”

Sam opened his mouth to respond, but Dean’s phone chose this moment to ring. When Dean saw Cas’s name on the screen, his heart started beating wildly.

“I need to take this”, he said quickly, standing up.

“Cas? Are you okay?” He asked immediately when he picked up. Sam shot him a strange look, but Dean ignored him.

“Hello, Dean. I’m okay. Why?” Cas asked. He sounded too tired for Dean's liking. “Did something happen?”

Dean let out a breath he was holding.

“No, I was just worried, man. You went radio silent for a few days.”

“I… I’m sorry. I didn’t want you to worry about me. We sailed to the other side of Gotland. It took some time to get here and I was almost by myself on the deck since the crew was sick.”

Dean's body slumped with relief. He missed Cas’s deep voice.

“Okay. That’s great. I mean, it's not good they're sick, but I'm glad you're okay,” he said, trying to calm himself down. He ran his hand over his face.

“Dean, is everything alright?” Cas asked.

“Yeah… yeah. Now it is. Just - don’t do that again,” Dean said, suddenly frustrated.

“...Okay. I won’t.”

“Good. Now, you were saying you sailed to the other side of Gotland?” Dean asked, finally sitting back down on the sofa. He glanced at Sam, who frowned at him. Dean rolled his eyes.

“Yes, I decided to hide from the wind on the east side of the island. Tomorrow we’ll get back to Visby.” Cas fell silent for a moment, then added, “Everything is fine, Dean.”

“Right. Okay. Can you call me tomorrow when you get home?”

“Of course,” Cas said. He sounded like he was smiling. Dean smiled too.

“Good. Listen, uh… I need to get back to Sammy. We’re kinda in the middle of…” he glanced at Sam again, who shot him an unimpressed look. “...a conversation.”

“I understand. Say ‘hi’ to Sam, then,” Cas said.

“Yeah, okay. Till tomorrow, Cas,” Dean said before they hung up. When he looked back at Sam, his brother was deeply frowning. 

Dean made a face. “What?”

“I mean… I guess I didn’t realize Cas is such a good friend,” Sam finally said.

“Yeah, he is. He says ‘hi’, by the way.”

“Huh,” Sam nodded slowly. He looked like he wanted to say more.

“C’mon, spit it out.”

“Didn’t you see him for like, three days combined?”

Dean snorted, then shook his head, looking at the ceiling. Finally, he looked back down at his brother. “Yeah. But we talked many times since then, genius. Like, a lot. What’s wrong with having a friend, anyway?” 

“Nothing. It’s just surprising, that’s all.”

Dean squinted his eyes. “What, that someone likes talking to me?” 

Sam gave Dean his bitch face again. “No. I’m just surprised that in such a short period of time you two are so close. You're talking with him like… I don't know… like he’s a part of the family, I guess.”

Dean sighed, then looked out the window again. “I know. I’m surprised too. But he’s one of the good guys, Sam.” He glanced back at his brother. ”I actually invited him to Porto, so you’re gonna meet him soon, too.”

“Really? When?”

“In a few weeks. He’s gonna take his son with him. Jack wants to see your guinea pig.”

“You talked with them about my guinea pig?”

“We talked about a lot of things, Sam. Now, where were we with this whole Excel sheet situation?”

+

Once he had found out that Cas was safe, Dean’s day went smoothly. He and Sam didn’t find the perfect solution for Dean’s problem with suits and Excel, but his brother agreed to check if any of their employees would be able to help with these tasks, at least until they could figure out something else. Dean even managed to finish the budget somehow, surprising not only himself but also Mildred from the financial department.

He came home late that evening, after another dinner at Sam's, partly covered in glitter. He was alone since Bobby had decided he wanted to stay with the kids until next Sunday. He loved being a Granddad - he was constantly spoiling Mary and DJ with ice cream, stories, and walks on the beach. Dean hoped that they would finally be able to convince him, Ellen, and Jo to move to Porto permanently.

When Dean took a shower, he lay on the bed in his clean underwear and unlocked the phone. He discovered two new messages from Charlie, who invited him to a game night with Dorothy the next day. Dean had a free evening anyway, and he really wanted to finally meet the girl that Charlie wouldn't shut up about.

He put his phone away, then closed his eyes and tried to relax. As had been happening quite often lately, images of Cas’s blue eyes danced in his thoughts. Sam’s reaction to Dean’s behavior wasn’t particularly strange. Dean had faced the exact same problem when he'd had to explain his bond with Cas to Bobby - it seemed like there was no normal way to admit that Cas had weaseled his way to Dean’s heart and settled there for good. It had kinda happened in the meantime, between conversations and sharing stories, but there was no doubt that whether Dean wanted it or not, Cas was family now.

Chapter Text

“Are you gonna tell him that you're into men, at least?” Charlie asked, sipping her wine. 

They had been playing board games for the last three hours, but when Charlie had won for the fourth time, Dean and Dorothy had decided to switch to talking. Dean had started to regret it the moment Charlie had mentioned Cas. After 30 minutes of grilling him, she still refused to drop the subject.

“My sweet, sweet bean, leave the boy alone. Don't you see he's pale?” Dorothy asked Charlie from behind her. They were currently sitting on the couch, Charlie on Dorothy's lap. Throughout the evening they kept hugging and holding hands, which was extremely cute, even if the word ‘cute’ didn't come to mind in the case of bold and confident Dorothy. Dean had found out she ran her own restaurant in Porto (they even had some vegan options). And she really owned a motorcycle. Dean liked her already.

“But he's got no one to talk about it! I've known him for too long babe, he's gonna bottle up all of his feelings and won't tell Cas anything!” Charlie whined.

“Wow, no need to be brutal, Charles,” Dean said, diving into his wine. Even if slightly inebriated, Charlie was right about Dean's fears - she knew him pretty well. It was quite clear that Dean had found Cas super hot from the moment he had met him, but since then everything got more and more complicated. The truth was, Dean was terrified to lose his friend at this point. He knew that the bond forming between them was special, and he'd rather stay silent for the rest of his life than tell Cas he wanted something more, risking everything in the process. He obviously couldn't tell all of that to Charlie, the hopeless romantic. Her voice snapped him back to the present.

“Dean! What if he's like, The One? What if you're meant to be? And you won't even tell him you want to stick your-”

“O-kay, I think you’ve had enough of the red juice,” Dorothy interjected, taking the glass from Charlie's hand, despite her protests. Dean sent her a grateful look, then glanced at Charlie, meeting her expectant gaze.

“I guess I have a few more weeks left to prepare myself for Cas’s visit. And you know, he's not gonna be here by himself. It all needs to stay kid-friendly,” he finally said, sipping from his glass.

“Ugh, why are you so… Stubborn?!” Charlie exclaimed frustrated, throwing her hands into the air. Dean chuckled nervously. “Stop laughing, Dean. I want to make sure you end up with someone who actually makes you happy,” she said, pointing her finger at him.

“I know, and I love you for it, Charles. But uh… It’s not that simple,” he ended quietly, looking at the dark floor.

“How is that not simple? I can see that you’re longing for the guy already. I have never seen you like this, Winchester.”

Dean winced. He tried to formulate a response, but fortunately, his phone chose this exact moment to ring.

“Saved by the bell, I guess,” Charlie said, eyeing him suspiciously. Dean stood up, threw her a grin, and rushed to the other room to pick up, closing the door behind him.

“Cas?”

“Hello, Dean. I believe I promised you a call when I get back. I’m at home.”

“Shit, man, you’ve got no idea how happy I am to hear from you right now.”

Cas chuckled through the speaker. “Why is that?” He asked after a beat.

Because Charlie wanted me to admit I've got hots for you. 

Yeah, no. 

Dean didn’t have a normal, friendly answer for that, so he muttered “Well, y’know,” in an attempt to sound casual. He closed his eyes and leaned his head on the door behind him. It seemed he couldn’t catch a break today.

“Hmm…” Cas rumbled thoughtfully.

“How was sailing today?” Dean asked, changing the subject.

“Peaceful. The sea was calm. I even managed to sleep a little.”

“Well, you sure as hell sound tired,” Dean stated. Cas’s deep voice was tinted with fatigue. “Are you really gonna sail out tomorrow?”

“Yes, but I’m going to be back on Thursday.” He paused, then added. “I fail to understand why you were so worried about me, Dean. You know I was going to be okay, right?”

Dean frowned. What kind of logic was that?

“Of course I was worried, you dumbass. The weather was crap, your crew was sick and you were clearly tired! I couldn’t even check where you were on the vessel finder, man, didn’t know the name of the sailboat,” he grumbled, annoyed. ”This is stupid. I mean,   you   are the one who came to rescue me in Gedser, remember?”

“I didn't rescue you, Dean. But I see your point. My apologies,” Cas said, suspiciously amused. “I will provide you with the information of the boat’s name in the future. And I will remain careful, I promise.”

“Good,” Dean said, satisfied that he finally managed to explain something to Cas. ”So, where are you sailing tomorrow?”

+

“I can't see shit here, brother,” Benny said, scratching his head. Bobby grunted behind him, his arms crossed. All three of them were leaning over the broken furling drum on Baby. 

“Told you it's not that simple. We need to take the damn thing off the headstay,” Bobby said.

“Do I have to buy a new furling drum? This shit’s expensive,” Dean whined.

“Stop complaining. We’ll try to fix this one first, you idjit.”

“Bobby’s right. Let me get my toolbox,” Benny stated, then turned around and marched to the cockpit. Dean briefly tracked his movement, then looked at Bobby.

“How have you been, boy?”

Dean frowned. They had seen each other at Sam’s the day before, so he wasn’t sure where Bobby's concern was even coming from.

“Me? I’m fine. Why do you ask?” 

“Hmm…” Bobby hummed. “You seem distant. Sam is worried. He can tell yer lost in yer own thoughts lately.”

Dean rolled his eyes. “Yeah, but that’s just what Sam does. He worries when I'm too calm, he worries when I'm agitated, and he even worries when I'm happy. It doesn’t really matter what I do, he'll be worried anyway.”

“You might have a point. Still, you should talk with the kid. Remember that he loves you, Dean. We all do.”

Dean nodded, exchanging a glance with his old man. God, how he hated talking about himself.

“Alright, chief, step aside. Let’s dismantle this big boy here,” Benny said, approaching them with a screwdriver in his hand.

+

When Dean finally entered his home, it was well past 10 PM. They hadn’t managed to repair the furling drum at the end, so Benny had taken it with him to try again in his workshop. Until the device was back in its place, Dean had to operate the jib in a more traditional way.

His apartment seemed too quiet, so Dean marched to his vinyl collection. Once he chose a record, he approached the gramophone and delicately lifted the needle arm. Soon, the room was filled with the first cords of ‘Whole Lotta Love’. Satisfied, Dean turned around and headed to the fridge. They had eaten a takeout on Baby, but he started to get hungry again. 

A quick inspection of the food he had left showed he could practice his skills in cooking some vegan stuff. August was fast approaching and Dean was only able to make a few plant-based dishes.

As he chopped carrots, Dean pondered Bobby’s words. His brother had long considered him someone who needed constant monitoring, just to ensure that Dean didn't do anything stupid. Ironically, the reality was quite the opposite. It had been Sam who had fallen in with a bad crowd in the past, and Dean had been the one who had gotten him out of it. Even now, the mention of Sam's ex-girlfriend's name was a topic they intentionally avoided whenever they met. 

Dean had always been the one who protected his loved ones from any harm, not the other way around, he thought, moving to chop the onions.

Suddenly, he felt his phone vibrating, so he pulled it out of his jeans. It was a video call from Cas. He positioned the device on the counter and when he picked it up, Dean saw two sets of incredibly blue eyes looking back at him.

“Oh, hey!” He waved, smiling. “Why aren’t you asleep, Jack?”

“Jack wanted to ask you an important question, Dean,” Cas responded instead of his son, amused. Jack looked sheepish.

“Sure, bud. Shoot.”

“Um. I have a request.”

Dean nodded and waved his knife to encourage the boy to continue.

“I know I’m not a little baby anymore, but I have um, trouble with sleeping. Sleeping alone in the dark, that is.”

Dean frowned. He glanced at Cas, unsure. “Okay?”

“So I’d like to ask you if I could sleep in a room with my Dad while we’re at your place.”

Dean smiled when he finally realized what was going on. “No problem, kiddo. No need to be scared. You’re gonna have a whole room to yourselves,” he said, then added. ”I used to be afraid of the dark too, y’know?”

“Really?” Jack asked in disbelief.

“Well, duh! Who wasn’t? There is nothing to be ashamed of,” Dean reassured him and smiled again, then winked at Cas and resumed chopping the vegetables.

“Cool. Thanks, Dean,” Jack said, then asked curiously, “What are you making?” 

“Oh, uh… actually I wanted to try something vegan today. I'm making a lasagna, kid. Do you like lasagna?”

Jack nodded violently. Dean chuckled.

“Good. We're gonna try it when you come here, then.”

“Lasagna, you say?” Cas interjected, intrigued.

Dean glanced at his friend. “Yeah, but I have no clue what I’m doing yet. I’m just adding random things inside.”

Cas raised an eyebrow. "That… doesn't sound very culinary. You do realize you can actually find a recipe online, right?"

Dean squinted at him. “No shit, Sherlock. Shut up, you’re gonna like it.”

“I never said I wouldn’t,” Cas responded, resting his chin on his hand. His eyes were gleaming with amusement.

“Can we make a pizza at your place, too?” Jack asked, bouncing excitedly. 

“Sure we can. Actually, you can send me a list of stuff you wanna try and I’ll get the ingredients. How does that sound?”

“Yay!” Jack exclaimed with joy, then turned his head to Cas. “Dad, can I invite Dean on TikTok?”

“I don’t see why not,” Cas responded, glancing at Dean unsure.

Dean winced. “Sorry, bud. I don’t have an account there. You can invite me on Instagram, though. I’ll send your Dad my username, okay?”

Jack nodded again pleased, then looked at Cas. ”Can I play on the phone for a few minutes now?”

“Jack, it’s late, your body needs sleep,” Cas responded. 

“Pleeeease… please, just for a little while,” Jack whined. Dean chuckled while he stirred the vegetables in a pan. The aroma of spices filled the air around him.

Cas sighed, then finally nodded. “Alright, but you’ve got five minutes.” Jack fist-pumped, then turned around and ran somewhere off-screen. Cas turned his attention back to Dean. His impossibly blue eyes pierced right into Dean’s soul.

“Just so you know, he doesn’t use social media without my supervision. He won’t bother you.”

“Cas, c’mon. You guys can contact me all you want,” Dean said as he poured oat milk into the pot, stirring its contents. “So, how are you?”

Cas's gaze lingered on Dean. “Tired, mostly. I’m really looking forward to our vacation at your place.” He put his forehead on the table before him with a grunt and muttered, “I’m getting old.”

“What the fuck are you talking about? Stop it, you’re fine. You’re just overworked. Your schedule is insane, dude,” Dean responded, then remembered he had to focus on the pot and keep stirring the béchamel sauce so it wouldn’t burn.

“God, I want to eat this lasagna,” Cas muttered again after a moment, looking at the screen from the table.

Dean chuckled, then arched an eyebrow at Cas. “Even with all of the random ingredients?”

“At this point, I will just trust the process.”

“Wow, glad you believe in me.”

“I’m just hungry,” Cas deadpanned. 

Dean snorted, then shook his head. Cas had never failed to make him laugh at stupid shit so far.

“Okay, you tribble.”

Cas tilted his head and squinted at Dean, a gesture he started to associate solely with Castiel by now.

“I… don’t know what that means.”

“Oh man, you didn’t see ‘Star Trek’ either, huh? Don't you worry, you’re gonna be a pro when I finish with you.” Once the words left Dean’s mouth and he realized how it actually sounded, he felt a blush creeping up his neck and cheeks.

“If you say so,” Cas said quietly with a gleam in his eyes. Dean could only blame himself at this point. He cleared his throat, then turned to the pan and added tomato sauce to the mix.

“And how are you, Dean? Is Bobby still there?” Cas rumbled after a beat, his chin on his hand again.

“Yeah,” Dean answered, stirring the vegetables. “But he's going back home tomorrow. It's a shame he's living so far away from us.” He stopped, then turned his gaze at Cas on the screen. “Apart from that, I'm golden.”

Cas raised one eyebrow slightly. “Are you, though?”

Dean rolled his eyes, then focused on seasoning the dish. Cas was starting to see right through his bullshit, apparently.

“I mean, my brother is a pain in the ass and I still hate my job sometimes, but I’m working on it, I guess,” he answered truthfully.

“I see. Why is Sam giving you a hard time?”

“Probably just 'cause he’s Sam. He wants to talk about my feelings constantly, man,” he chuckled, then looked up at Cas again. “But I’m getting better, I swear. He just doesn’t believe me.” 

A small smile flickered across Cas’s face. “He will come around, eventually,” he responded.

Dean observed Cas closely for a moment. Fatigue marked his features.

“Man, you should go to sleep. You look tired as hell.”

Cas sighed. “Yes, I think you’re right. I need to extract Jack from his phone, too. I will call you again when I can.”

“Sure thing, man. Have a good night.”

“You too, Dean,” Cas said, then smiled and ended the call.

+

The following days passed quickly, and Dean found himself more busy than usual. Once Bobby returned home, Dean buried himself with work. They had a few more meetings that Sam made him attend, despite Dean’s protests. One of them involved the persistent Shaylene - Benny and Sam struggled to stifle their laughter in the corner of the conference room while Dean literally fought for his life. The chick was stubborn, he had to give her that.

Despite the added workload, Dean's anticipation of Cas’s and Jack's arrival in Porto kept him going. They talked a few more times over the phone, discussing the details and bantering over nothing important. He didn’t admit that to Cas, but those late-night talks became his source of comfort.

Sam, on the other hand, approached Dean with guarded care, as if dealing with a wounded animal. Unspoken tension lingered in the air between them. Dean was determined to ignore it, at least for now, uncertain about how to navigate through the awkward situation. While they had always been close, and Dean had valued his brother's support, he didn't really know what to say to him now. He had tried to talk to Charlie about it, but his redheaded friend had been sure that the solution to all of his problems had been simple - he should just announce to everyone that he wanted to kiss Cas stupid and fuck the guy on the nearest table. Not that Dean was opposed to those particular activities, but the fear of scaring Cas away and losing him entirely was too great. He was also almost sure that sharing his deepest fantasies wouldn't help resolve anything between him and his brother. Fortunately, as the guests' arrival approached and Dean's mood improved, Sam finally stopped shooting him worried looks all the time.

In the last week before the date of their flight to Porto, Dean began deep cleaning the whole apartment, scrubbing every nook and cranny. In his guest room, he had a bed similar to his own and just as big, so Cas and Jack would definitely be comfortable in it. Cas had reassured him twice that they could easily sleep on a large bed, especially considering Jack's earlier request. Dean also bought loads of groceries, stocking up on Jack's favorite cereal of all brands. When he changed the sheets in the guest room on Saturday evening and added a few pillows, the house was finally ready. He felt a wave of exhaustion overcoming him, so he decided to call it a day and take a hot shower.

Once under the stream, Dean closed his eyes and let the water wash away his thoughts. It massaged his neck and shoulders with just the right pressure and soon Dean felt himself relax at the feeling. It’s been so long since someone touched him with intent, he thought. He had been completely uninterested in casual sex lately, and during his private moments, his mind almost always presented him with visions of ocean eyes and messy dark hair. He had tried to fight it before, but he was quite sure he was going to lose this battle anyway, whatever he would or wouldn't do. 

Dean took a deep breath, deciding to welcome the pleasant thoughts this time. He leaned against the wall of his shower, imagining a tall figure with broad shoulders right in front of him, a huge tattoo of wings at his fingertips. Dean imagined tracing the lines of the ink with his tongue, tasting the saltness of Cas’s body on his way. What would Cas’s skin taste like? Would it be salty, like the ocean, to match the color of his eyes and his addictive scent? He would go slow, starting from the bottom of Cas’s back, and climbing methodically up from there, until he’d reach his neck and lick Cas under his ear. He could easily nib on Cas’s shoulders and reach his dick at the same time, he thought, finally covering his hard cock with his hand. The sensation of pleasure overwhelmed him. He imagined Cas growing hard in his hand, his breath getting quicker. Dean would speak nonsense into his ear and pinch his nipple a little, just to add another stimulus to the whole experience, until Cas would start breaking apart in Dean’s embrace. He wondered how Cas’s deep, stormy voice would sound, would he moan loudly? He stroked himself faster, feeling the pressure building in his abdomen. He started panting, overwhelmed with the fantasy inside of his head. He was getting close ridiculously fast. He imagined sliding his thumb across the head of Cas’s dick, just as he did to himself, changing the pace. He moaned, stroking his aching cock into the tight heat of his hand until he felt a pulsating pleasure. His vision went white, the blissful feeling overwhelming him. He came on the bathroom tiles, imagining soaking his teeth in Cas’s neck, his heart racing.

He came down slowly, trying to calm his frantic heartbeat. He was sure that the orgasm was stronger than any he had ever experienced alone. When Dean finally opened his eyes, he felt a pang of longing. It'd been so good to imagine Cas like this, in his arms - addictive even. He was, however, completely alone in the shower, jerking off to an imaginary situation involving a person, who was probably his best friend at this point. He sighed, pained by the prospect of never experiencing such a scenario in real life.

+

The morning of Cas’s and Jack's arrival dawned crisp and clear, the sunlight casting a golden hue over the Douro River. Dean woke up feeling groggy and disoriented, so he decided to stay in bed for a little longer. When he unlocked his phone, he discovered a new message from Cas - they had left home. He felt the corners of his lips lifting. He was going to see Cas again today. 

He had rescheduled their weekly dinner at Sam's for Monday since his brother wanted to meet Cas and Jack too. Dean would lie if he said he wasn’t nervous about the prospect of his brother meeting Castiel, and even though he was almost certain they would like each other, he could never be sure what Sam would think of his friend. Informing him that Cas and Jack ate only vegan stuff had been fun, at least.

“Vegan? As in a plant-based diet? That vegan?”

“Yeah, Sammy. What other vegan diets do you know?”

“Uh… I don’t, it’s just…”

“What?”

”Nothing. And you’re going to eat vegan stuff, too?”

“Sure am.”

“With… all of the vegetables?”

“Yep.”

“Huh.”

The silence following this conversation had been incredible. Dean had basically managed to shock Sam into silence. It had definitely been his first.

After almost an hour of senseless scrolling through his social media apps, Dean finally stood up and decided to start his day. He wanted to cook a nice dinner for his guests. 

+

A few hours later, Dean navigated the bustling airport in Porto, his eyes scanning the crowd for any sign of his friend. The hum of foreign languages and the whirl of luggage carousels filled the air around him. He felt excited, but also a little worried. What if Jack didn't like him, after all? They had seemed to get along over the phone during those past weeks, but there was no way to tell if it would remain the same in person, right?

Suddenly, Dean spotted a familiar face near the arrivals gate and all of the previous thoughts flew from his mind. Cas was wearing a black T-shirt and a pair of dark jeans tightly hugging his ass.

How is this dude so handsome, fucking hell. 

Cas didn’t seem to see him yet, his piercing blue eyes searching the place. Behind him, Dean saw a smaller figure with blonde hair, staring at the phone in front of him. He felt a grin forming on his lips. He started walking in that direction, navigating through the crowd. In the meantime, Jack finally looked up and his face lit up with recognition.

“Dean!” He exclaimed with a smile and started running. Cas didn’t manage to catch his son in time and watched as Jack moved away from him in horror until his eyes finally met Dean's and a bright smile spread across his face. Dean didn't have time to smile back at him though, because Jack stopped right in front of him.

“Wow, you’re tall!” He said, his eyes wide. He raised his hand like he wanted to wave. “Hi, Dean!”

“Hiya, bud! It’s nice to finally meet you in person,” Dean smiled at him. Apart from the hair, the boy was Cas’s spitting image. When Dean looked back up, he saw his friend approaching them. 

“Hello, Dean,” Cas said in his deep, rumbling voice with a gentle smile, then turned his head to the boy. “Jack, what did I tell you about running at the airport? You scared me. Don’t do that again.”

Jack looked sheepish. “But I found Dean, Dad.”

“Yes, I can see that, but what if it wasn’t Dean at all? What if something happened to you? Please, don’t run away like that again,” Cas said calmly. Jack nodded, then glanced at Dean, who winked at the boy. Jack grinned at him in response. 

Dean finally turned his full attention to smiling Cas. He stepped closer, then embraced Dean in a warm hug.

Dean was surrounded by the stormy scent again.

The time could've stopped, Dean wouldn’t even notice.

“Hiya, Cas,” he said quietly. Castiel only hugged him tighter. 

After a few moments, or maybe an hour later, Dean felt a tug at his sleeve. When he looked down, he saw Jack’s impatient glare.

“C’mon guys, I’m hungry.”

Dean snorted, then let go of Cas, studying his face. His friend looked tired. He hadn't been kidding, he needed a vacation.

“How was your flight?” Dean asked.

“Long,” Cas admitted, then looked at Jack. “And we’re hungry.”

“Gotcha. Let’s roll, I’ve got a treat for you two.”

Once they made it to the parking lot, Dean put the luggage into the Mustang’s trunk. Cas looked at his car with approval. 

“I think you’ve got a type, Dean,” he said with a gleam in his eyes before he sat in the passenger’s seat.

“You’ve got no idea,” Dean replied under his breath, then opened the driver’s door and sat down. When Jack finally managed to fasten his seatbelt, Dean started the engine.

The drive back to his place took them about 20 minutes, filled with Jack’s excited prattle. Dean nodded and asked questions from time to time, stealing glances at Cas, who seemed to be watching the scenery outside the window. He looked relaxed. 

“Alright, we’re here,” said Dean, when they finally pulled into his garage. Jack shot out of the car and ran towards the front door, while Cas and Dean took care of the luggage. Dean noticed probably all of Cas’s muscles flexing under his dark clothes.

When he opened the door and let his guests in, the pleasant smell of food lingered in the air. Jack stepped inside, then looked at Dean, his eyes wide. 

“Did you make lasagna?”

“Yeah.” Dean grinned at him. The boy started jumping with joy.

“Jack, take off your shoes and wash your hands first,” Cas said, looking around the apartment. His eyes landed on the gramophone, then on Dean’s table, then finally on the keys to Impala, hanging by the door. He smiled, touching the keys.

“The best keychain I’ve ever had,” Dean said, examining Cas’s face. Castiel looked back at him with his soul-searching gaze. 

“Dad, stop standing there. You’re weird,” Jack said from the kitchen after a beat. Cas turned his eyes away, then chuckled and nodded. Dean focused on taking off his own shoes, fighting with the blush creeping up his cheeks. When he managed to take control over his face again, Dean turned to his guests. 

“Okay, let’s start with the food. I’m gonna show you around after we eat,” he said, moving to the oven.

When Cas and Jack sat by the table, Dean put the steaming dish between the plates.

“Do you want some wine, Cas?” He asked, but Castiel shook his head.

“Tea would be great.”

“Okay. What about you, Jack? Do you want some juice?”

The boy nodded, then focused on tracing the wave pattern on the table.

“I really like your apartment. And this table is incredible,” Castiel said, looking around again.

“Thanks. It’s custom-made, actually,” Dean answered while putting the glass with juice in front of Jack.

“Can I play something on the gramophone?” Cas asked.

“Sure. Make yourself at home here, guys. You can do whatever you want, no need to ask me,” Dean chuckled.

Castiel stood up and padded to Dean’s vinyl collection, carefully examining the titles. Finally, he chose one of the records and placed the vinyl on the player.

At first, Dean didn’t recognize the band, but after the banjo came in, he realized it was a record he had gotten from Charlie a few years back.

“‘Mumford and Sons’. I actually forgot I had that,” Dean said, placing the mug with tea in front of Cas’s plate.

“Dad loves them,” Jack said, sipping from his glass, while Cas came back to the table, smiling softly.

“I hope that’s okay?” He asked, unsure.

“C’mon, stop it. Mi casa and all that. Let’s eat,” Dean answered with a smile, reaching for Cas’s plate.

He knew he had given his all in this recipe, but he still felt nervous until the first sounds of delight over the lasagna filled the room.

“Whoa, this is good,” said Jack, stuffing his mouth with another bite of the food.

“God, I’ve missed your cooking. I think I’m gonna cry,” Cas said after a moment of chewing with his eyes closed.

Dean beamed with joy. “Eat up, then. I’m happy when you’re happy,” he said, then finally took a bite too. 

He felt himself relaxing in the homey atmosphere that came along with his guests. The music pleasantly filled the silence, but did not disturb the conversation. Dean learned more about their flight to Porto and Jack's ideas for the coming days. The boy was lively and cheerful. Dean couldn't help but notice his facial expressions were identical to Cas’s. 

Once they ate their second helping, Cas insisted on cleaning the dishes, but Dean forced him to leave this task to him, at least for today. He proceeded to show his guests an apartment, then helped to transport their luggage to the room upstairs.

“My bedroom is right next to yours, so if anything happens, just let me know,” he said, then looked at Jack, who yawned widely.

“I’m tired,” the kid declared. 

“Well, it’s been a long day,” Cas admitted, looking at his son. “Can you take a shower, Jack? I need to talk with Dean for a moment.”

“Okay,” the boy nodded, then disappeared into the guest room. Dean glanced at Cas curiously.

“I need about 20 minutes to read him a bedtime story and make sure he’s asleep. Will you still be up?” Cas asked, tilting his head in a familiar gesture.

“Sure, Cas. I’m gonna take care of the dishes.”

“Good. See you in a moment, then,” Cas said, then disappeared behind the door.

Dean felt a shiver running down his spine. His body sure as hell had to get used to Cas's presence because he was once again acting like a lunatic around the guy. He sighed, then turned around and went downstairs to fill the dishwasher.

30 minutes later, while Dean poured himself a glass of water in the kitchen, Cas appeared in the living room with a bag in his hands.

“Hey. Jack’s asleep?” Dean asked, turning to his friend.

“Yes. He’s got a problem with darkness, I can’t seem to find a reason for this fear.”

Dean chuckled softly. “I get it. He’s still a kid, Cas. He’s gonna grow up from it. Do you want some wine now?”

“Um, actually, I wanted to give you something first,” Cas said and approached Dean, handing him a bag. When Dean glanced inside, he saw a bottle of amber liquid. 

“It’s Punsch from Sweden. I wanted to thank you for inviting us here.”

“Cas, you didn’t have to. I’m really glad you came,” Dean said truthfully.

“Still, I wanted to say that we’re grateful.”

“Okay, let’s crack this bad boy open before we drown in emotions here,” Dean said, smirking, then turned to his cabinets looking for a bottle opener. 

Castiel sat down at the table behind him. “I’m happy we’re finally here,” he said, looking through Dean’s window.

“It’s good to have you here,” Dean said, filling two glasses with the golden alcohol.

“Why did you move to Porto?” Cas asked after a moment.

“Uh…” Dean started, putting the glasses on the table and sitting down. “We wanted to expand our business. We didn’t know where to begin, since we’re not from Europe, so we went to the fair in Lisbon and met Benny Lafitte and his wife, Andrea. They helped us to find the right spot,” he said.

Cas tilted his head and squinted his eyes at him.“ Lafitte…I’ve heard this name before,” he murmured, lost in thoughts. He sipped from his glass, then looked at Dean expectantly, raising his eyebrow. Dean examined the fluid, then took a sip as well. It was sweet and strong. He nodded in approval.

“What’s your company called, Dean?” Cas asked after a moment.

Hell, it was gonna happen eventually. 

“Um… it’s Singer & Winchesters.”

Dean observed Cas’s face. The moment the realization hit, Cas’s jaw dropped. He looked at Dean in disbelief - “ The  Singer & Winchesters? Are you serious, Dean? I thought it was just some little company that you run with your brother.”

“Well, I do run it with my brother,” Dean said, smirking from behind his glass. “And it used to be little.” 

Cas’s eyes narrowed dangerously. “Stop it, Dean. Why didn’t you tell me sooner?”

“What did you expect me to say, man? It’s not like it changes anything. I told you I build boats and stuff…”

“Well, you technically did. But if I knew, maybe I wouldn’t ask you if you knew someone who builds good boats,” Cas said smirking. He shook his head in disbelief.

“Karma is a bitch,” Dean said, then downed his drink and winked at Cas.

Cas hummed in agreement, then chuckled.

“You told me your mother’s name was Campbell. I assumed it’s your name too.”

“Yeah. She kept her maiden name after she married my father, John Winchester. She was a woman working at the university, y’know? She wanted her colleagues to treat her seriously. It was… challenging.”

“I see,” Cas said, then sipped his drink. “So, I assume you’re a busy man, then, Mr. Winchester. At what time do you start work tomorrow?” Cas asked with a gleam in his eyes.

“Tomorrow I don’t start shit. I took the entire week off and cleared my schedule. You’re not gonna get rid of me so easily, smartass,” Dean said, pouring them a second round of the sweet alcohol. ”But we’ve got one dinner invitation for tomorrow - to Sam’s and Eileen’s. They would love to meet you and Jack if that’s okay. And I believe our manager is gonna be there, too. He’s a dick, but I’m sure you can handle him.”

“Alright. I’m looking forward to meeting your family. I’ve actually got a Scotch for Sam.”

Dean snorted. “He still doesn’t know I bought him the previous one, so don’t rat me out.”

Cas smirked. “My lips are sealed,” he rumbled. 

“Okay. Before we go, I have to inform you that Eileen is deaf. She’s great at lip reading, though.”

Cas blinked. “That won’t be a problem. I know ASL, and so does Jack.”

Dean's mouth formed an 'O'. “How?” He asked in disbelief.

“I uh… know a few languages.”

“This again? That’s insane!” Dean whined. “Tell me at least two more languages you know, dude.”

“Alright. I know Portuguese and Spanish.”

“God, I hate you.” 

Cas chuckled, then sipped from his glass.

“And what about Jack? Is he a genius too?” Dean asked. Cas rolled his eyes.

“He knows ASL because he learns it at his school. He’s not fluent yet, but I believe it won’t be a problem. And just to clarify, my son is very smart.”

“Yeah, almost too smart. I feel stupid around you guys,” Dean grumbled.

Cas snorted. “Dean, you’re an owner of an extremely successful company specializing in sailboat building. Please, enlighten me, how exactly are you ‘stupid’?”

 He fucking used air quotes, what a dork. 

“Okay, fair enough. But I want you to teach me Portuguese, man,” Dean demanded.

“As you wish, but you’re going to regret it,” Cas responded, smirking.

“Dad?” They suddenly heard a weak voice coming from upstairs.

“Shit,” Cas said quietly, then looked at Dean mouthing "Sorry". He stood up and directed his steps upstairs. Dean discreetly ogled his ass, then downed his drink and leaned back in his chair. 

It was so nice to have Cas in his space again, he thought. In fact, having both Cas and Jack under his roof filled him with a warmth he hadn't even realized he was yearning for. It just felt right, like a missing piece of the puzzle had slotted back into place. 

He couldn’t help but feel excited for the upcoming days.

+

“Dean!”

He jolted awake and sat up, looking for the source of the sound in panic, his heart racing. Finally, his gaze landed on Jack, currently standing at the door to his bedroom.

“What happened, kid?” Dean asked, alarmed.

“Um… nothing. I just wanted to ask if you have a jam. I wanted to make a sandwich.”

Dean took a deep breath, trying to calm himself down.

“Sure. C’mon, I’ll show you where you can find everything,” he chuckled, standing up.

When they reached the kitchen, Dean saw that Cas wasn’t there yet.

“Is your Dad still sleeping?” He asked the boy. Jack nodded. “Okay, let’s keep it that way. Are you sure about the sandwiches or may I suggest pancakes instead?”

Jack’s eyes gleamed, making Dean chuckle again.

“Pancakes it is, then. You can check out what's on Netflix, if you’d like.”

+

Dean and Jack were in the middle of singing ‘Let It Go’ from ‘Frozen’ when Cas joined them downstairs. It was almost 10 AM, so the food they had left for him were already cold.

“Good morning, sunshine!” Dean greeted him with a smile, then stood up and marched to the kitchen area. “How did you sleep?”

Cas slowly looked around, his gaze stopped at his son, who continued to watch the movie, then at Dean. “Um. Long?” He finally said. Dean couldn’t help but smile. The owl was definitely back.

“Yeah, that was the idea. You needed rest, man. You looked like death warmed over. May I suggest coffee and pancakes?” Dean asked.

Cas nodded, then sat by the table. “Thank you. I slept extremely well. Your bed is comfortable.”

“Glad to hear it,” Dean said, looking for a mug. “Listen, I’ve been thinking, I could show you around Porto today. The weather is perfect for a walk. Dinner’s at six, so we could just explore the city until then.”

“What about caves and castles?” Jack asked, worried.

Dean chuckled. “We’ve got three full weeks to see every nice cave and castle in this country, bud.”

“Okay,” Jack nodded, then focused on the TV in front of him again. 

Dean glanced back at Cas. “Walk around Porto sounds perfect, Dean. I just need my coffee to-”

“Wake up, I know. Give me a sec,” Dean said, then turned to his coffee machine. When the beverage was ready, he put it in front of his friend.

“Thank you,” Cas said, then rested his chin on his hand. “When did Jack get up?”

“Uh… at 8 AM? But I should inform you we were perfectly fine without you.”

Cas glanced at his son again, then back at Dean. He smiled sweetly. “Yes, I can see that. Thank you, Dean.”

“Stop thanking me for stupid stuff, man. C’mon, drink your happy potion and eat a pancake.”

+

“Okay, so I’m not sure if you want to go inside, but the cathedral is insanely beautiful, so I’d start there,” Dean said once they were sitting in the car. Cas was wearing yet another bee-themed T-shirt and his sunglasses.

“I’ll trust you on this. I really don’t mind visiting a church, or any temple, for that matter,” he said, a smile flashing across his frustratingly handsome face.

“Great. What about you, bud? Do you want to see a cathedral?” Dean turned his face to the boy.

“Is it pretty and old?”

“It’s pretty and old,” Dean confirmed.

“I wanna go.”

“Terrific,” Dean said, then started the engine. When he drove into the street, he glanced at Cas. “Let’s listen to some music.”

“Alright. Should I pick something?”

“Sure, why not? I feel adventurous. Open the glove compartment.”

Cas shook his head, then did what Dean had told him to and started rummaging through his collection of cassettes hidden inside.

“So you say I can choose between classic rock and... classic rock?” He asked amused after a moment.

“I never said I have Beyonce here, man. C’mon, pick one before I grow old.”

"You wouldn’t die if you listened to her music,” Cas said quietly, inserting a cassette into the old radio. Shortly after, the first few notes of Queen's ‘Bohemian Rhapsody’ filled Mustang’s speakers. Apparently, Jack and Cas knew all the words, and the three of them began singing loudly along with Freddie.

Their performance wasn’t a masterpiece at any rate, but Dean wouldn’t exchange this moment for any other.

20 minutes later Dean finally managed to get to the other side of the river and find a parking space. They started walking in the direction of the cathedral, taking a detour every time Jack or Cas saw something nice. When they finally reached the square in front of the old church, Jack exclaimed “Whoa!” and ran to the pillory standing in the middle. Cas looked around.

“I’m afraid I’m not as good of a guide as you are,” said Dean after a moment. 

“I don’t mind. You were right, it’s beautiful out here,” Cas said, smiling at Dean. He looked at the cathedral behind them and pulled out his phone to take a picture while Dean observed Jack running around the square. 

“Would you like to take a picture together?” Cas asked, smirking at Dean after a moment of documenting their surroundings.

“Sure, Cas,” Dean responded, grinning. 

“Alright. Let’s get closer. Jack!” Cas called the boy, who ran to them. ”Stand in the middle, please,” Cas instructed, then raised his arm with a phone in front of him. Some lady observed them for a moment, then asked if they wanted her to take a picture instead. Cas nodded with a smile, handing her his phone. He put one of his hands on Jack’s shoulder and wrapped his other arm around Dean. Dean decided to do the same, feeling like a schoolgirl.

“Okay. Smile!” The lady said, then took a photo and handed the phone back. Cas thanked her, then glanced at the screen to see the result. Dean looked at the phone above Cas’s shoulder.

“Our second picture together,” Castiel said, turning his head to Dean.

“Yeah,” Dean responded weakly, fighting with a warm, fuzzy feeling spreading through his stomach.

“I'll send it to you,” Cas said, smiling softly.

“Thanks,” Dean responded, then cleared his throat and glanced at Jack, looking for a distraction.

“Hey, drink some water, bud. It’s hot,” he said.

Jack nodded and took a bottle out of his backpack. When he sipped from it, he handed it to Cas.

“Okay guys, let’s see the inside of the cathedral. I'll show you a cool bookstore later," Dean stated and started walking in the direction of the building.

+

As Dean had correctly predicted, Jack and Cas didn’t even want to leave the Livraria Lello, the most famous bookshop in Porto. Somehow he managed to finally convince them to explore some other places as well, but only after promising vegan ice cream and coffee by the river.

When they reached the bustling Cais da Ribeira promenade, Jack’s eyes went wide. The place was crowded, but the view of the riverfront was totally worth seeing. It was so pretty, that Dean had actually planned to visit it by night as well in the upcoming days. 

Once they found a nice place to sit down, Dean ordered a whole jug of cold water alongside their ice cream and coffee. Porto might not be the hottest spot in Portugal during the summer, but staying hydrated was a smart move.

The day was sunny and there were almost no clouds in the sky. The water of Douro reflected the bright rays of the sun, shimmering in front of them. They sat in silence for a while, just observing the boats crossing the river.

“This is beautiful,” Cas said, then closed his eyes and turned his head to the sun.

“Glad you like it,” Dean said, smiling. “Living here s’nice,” he added after a moment.

A smile flickered on Cas’s face.

“I like it here, too!” Jack declared, finishing his ice cream.

Cas glanced at his son, opening one eye. Jack's face was almost completely dirty now. Castiel sighed, then looked at Dean with resigned expression.

Dean chuckled and turned to the boy. “Great, bud. I think we should find a bathroom and see if we can find your face under all of the cream you’ve got there. And then we’ll go see the ocean.”

+

“So I can sign with Eileen? What about their kids?” Jack asked from the back seat of the Mustang. They were getting close to Sam’s house. 

“You can sign to them, too. But you don’t have to. They are hearing.”

“Okay,” Jack stated after a moment. Dean glanced at him in the mirror. The kid was nervous.

“Hey, Jack?” Dean said. The boy looked at him, his face serious. “We don’t have to stay there. If you don’t feel well, we can always go back home, okay?”

“Okay,” Jack answered with a nod. Dean glanced at Cas, who was smiling softly at him. He felt warmth spreading inside of his ribcage. He thought he would do almost anything to keep Cas looking at him like that all the time. 

Once they finally parked in front of the house and got out of the car, Cas marched to the trunk and took out the bag containing a gift for Sam. He sighed heavily. He looked nervous, too.

“Guys, it’s only my brother. There’s nothing to be afraid of, I swear,” Dean said, very much hating the tension surrounding them now.

“Let’s meet them,” said Cas, taking Jack’s hand into his. 

Dean led them to the front door and opened it, letting Cas and Jack in first. The corridor was spacious and bright, the lights on, clearly ready for the new guests. They could now hear the voices of the muffled conversation coming from the living room. Dean shot Jack a reassuring smile. The kid was still nervous but tried to be on his best behavior. Cas placed a hand on his shoulder to give him some support. 

“It’s gonna be okay,” Dean said again, looking at the boy. Jack nodded in response. Dean then glanced at Cas, who smiled with gratitude.

To be honest, Dean was nervous too. He still wasn't sure if Sammy would like Castiel, even if his gut told him they would get along like a house on fire. He led them down the hall and stopped at the open door to Sam's living room, allowing Cas and Jack to join him. He knocked on the doorframe, drawing the attention of the people sitting at the table. Dean spotted Eileen and Sam first, then his gaze landed on Crowley. On his left sat a lady he didn’t know. All of them were looking at newly arrived guests. Dean smiled brightly, turning to Cas and Jack, ready to introduce them, but the moment he saw Cas's eyes, he immediately knew something was wrong. Cas’s face lost all of its color and he gripped Jack’s shoulders tightly. His friend froze, carefully observing the people sitting at the table.

Dean furrowed his brows, then turned his gaze to the table as well. Sammy was in the middle of standing up, eyes wide and mouth hanging open. Crowley looked smug as fuck and started smiling dangerously. The lady Dean didn’t know, but was presumably accompanying their manager, looked deeply shocked. The only person with a normal expression was Eileen, calmly chewing on a piece of the food they were eating.

Everyone was staring straight at Cas. The silence was super loud.

And then, all the hell broke loose.

Chapter Text

The first one to speak was a lady Dean didn’t know. She had a pretty, round face and strong makeup, her hair loose. She looked seriously pissed now.

“Castiel, you motherfucker! Where the hell have you been all those years?”

Cas didn’t get the chance to respond before Sammy, gaping like a fish, turned his face to his brother, clearly offended. “How the hell do you know Castiel Novak, Dean?”

Dean looked at him like he had grown another head. What kind of question was that? Sam knew how they had met, Dean had told him the story. The real question was, why did everybody act like they knew something Dean didn’t? He glanced at Cas, who was already watching him with sadness, anger, and something else Dean couldn't exactly pinpoint. It looked a little too close to betrayal.

It didn’t make any sense.

Jack broke the silence next. “Dad, I don’t like it here. I think we should go home now.”

Cas looked at Jack and his face instantly softened. Before he had a chance to respond to the kid, Crowley decided to speak.

“Well, well, Feathers, fancy meeting you here. And with an offspring, no less. I honestly thought you were dead. Quite a pleasant surprise, don’t you think?”

Cas shot him a dangerous look. If it could kill, Crowley would be lying dead on the floor already, Dean was sure of it. The guy clearly didn’t mind, because his smirk only grew wider. 

Cas looked at Jack again, focusing all of his attention on the boy. “You are right, let’s go,” and started turning around. 

Dean finally found the tongue in his throat. “No, wait, please!” He stopped Cas, placing a hand on his arm, eyes pleading. “What’s going on?” He asked his friend quietly. Then, he turned his head to the people sitting by the table, raising his voice “What the hell is going on here?”

Sam was standing up now, his eyes wide. He looked like Christmas came early this year.

“It’s such a pleasure to meet you, Mr. Novak,” he said, completely ignoring Dean.

Dean glared at him. “Sit your ass down, Sammy. Now,” he growled, then looked at Cas again, searching his face. “Cas, please,” he said again, quietly. 

The emotions on Cas’s face changed quickly, like he wasn’t sure what to think anymore. He locked his eyes with Dean’s, searching his soul for some answers.

“You… don’t know,” he said softly after a beat. He bit his lip and glanced at the people in the room again, and then at Jack who looked seriously spooked. He looked up again, “Dean, I think we should talk in private."

Dean nodded, then glanced between his brother, Crowley, and the unknown lady. “Stay here. I’m serious,” he said, then finally looked at Eileen with pleading eyes. She somehow understood him immediately, because she nodded once, stood up, and approached Jack with a wide, warm smile on her face, taking the boy's hand into hers. “Come on, I’ll show you where my kids stash all of their toys and games. And we should meet the guinea pig. We can even play on a console if you’d like.” 

Jack looked unsure. He glanced between Cas and Dean.

“It’s okay, bud. Me and your Dad are gonna be in the kitchen if you need us,” Dean said. Cas nodded, smiling a little. Finally, Jack nodded too and went with Eileen willingly.

She was truly a miracle. 

Dean led Cas to Sam's kitchen, shutting the door behind them. Cas had a serious look on his face again, but he didn’t seem angry anymore. He leaned on the kitchen cabinet and crossed his arms. Dean stood near the door, biting his cheeks nervously and waiting to get any piece of information.

Finally, Cas spoke. “Do you remember when I told you I used to race on sailboats?” Dean nodded, frowning. He hadn’t paid much attention to it, back then. Castiel observed him closely. “I was really good at it. So good that I had to hire a manager. He's currently sitting in your brother's living room.”

“What? Crowley?” Dean grimaced. “I mean, I know he is good at what he does. We hired him too, after all. But he’s a dick.”

Cas nodded. “Yes, Crowley used to be my manager, back in the day. Before Jack was born, to be precise. He never met my son and I wanted to keep it that way, but I guess it is what it is.” Cas closed his eyes and sighed, shaking his head. “Meg is here too, though I’m not sure why. She and I used to be in one racing team,” he stopped again, opening his eyes. “What do you know about the America's Cup?”

Dean knew about the existence of this trophy awarded in sailing. The competition, called the America's Cup, was quite strange in his opinion. The match races were held by two teams - one who held the trophy, called the defender and the second one called the challenger, who tried to win the trophy. It was probably the biggest sailing event ever, so everyone associated with sailing at least knew about it.

Dean’s hands started to sweat. He began to suspect where Cas's speech was heading.

“I know that currently, the trophy is held by New Zealand, who won in 2017. Don’t fucking tell me when you said you used to race, you meant this,” Dean whined. 

Cas was inspecting the ceiling now. He took a deep breath and looked down again, searching Dean’s face. “My team, Alinghi, won in 2003. I was the skipper.”

Dean felt his jaw involuntarily drop and his mouth part. Cas had won the America's Cup? The fact that he had been the skipper meant that he had actually led the entire team to victory. It was no surprise Sam knew his name, the kid was nerdy as fuck and followed the sailing news like a hawk. Dean suddenly remembered he had challenged Cas to race him in the middle of the Baltic Sea a few months ago, just for fun.

“You what?! ” He exclaimed, feeling extremely dumb. How was this his life?

Cas looked helpless now, but he clearly wasn't done explaining.

“Dean, I didn’t tell you this right away for a reason. Back in the day, Crowley and the rest of the team pushed to race in other competitions and regattas. I raced since childhood on different vessels, so it was only natural for me to explore more opportunities. But when Jack was born and he was left in my custody in 2005, I decided to step down. I went back to Sweden to take care of him. Crowley and my team were furious - we won almost every race we competed in, so my decision had a huge impact on everyone. They didn't want me to go but I left them no choice. And I didn’t exactly tell them what was going on, either. I just said it was because of a family emergency. Nobody knew I even had a son, I didn't exactly announce it,” he stopped, searching Dean’s face again. “I wanted to tell you yesterday after dinner, but Jack called me upstairs.”

Dean suddenly felt dizzy. He walked to the chair and sat down, trying to calm his frantic heartbeat. It started to dawn on him that he somehow became friends with the fucking world champion.

After a moment, Cas spoke again.

“Dean, you need to know that Jack is the most important to me. I can’t let this whole situation harm him.”

That Dean understood perfectly. After the short time the three of them had spent together, Dean could tell that Castiel was a good, loving, and caring father. Whatever he had done in the past was less important than his kid. 

There was, however, one thing that Dean still didn't understand. 

“Back in the room, you were angry at me. Why?” He asked, looking Cas in the eyes.

Cas finally averted his gaze. His friend seemed almost guilty now. “When I saw Crowley, I thought you brought me here on purpose. Crowley tried to contact me for years after I left the team, but he couldn't find me. I was almost sure he eventually stopped looking for me, but the moment I saw him, I thought this time he succeeded.” Cas locked his eyes with Dean’s again. “I'm sorry, Dean. I lost my faith in you for a moment. I should've known better that you wouldn't do that,” he finally said, his voice deep and steady.

Dean would lie if he said he wasn’t hurt by those words. He ran a hand across his face, trying to formulate his response.

What a fucking mess. 

“Well, I wouldn't. If only I had known Cas, I wouldn't let Crowley see you or Jack. I had no idea.”

Cas finally walked over to the table and sat down on the chair across from Dean.

“I know. I shouldn’t assume anything else,” he said, looking at his hands. Finally, he glanced back up at Dean. ”I… I understand if you don’t want us to stay at your house anymore. We can always look for a hotel,” his friend said quietly.

Dean frowned. “What the fuck are you talking about?” He asked, offended. “Why would you even think that, dude? How many times do I have to tell you that I want you to stay in my home, as long as you can? Nothing has changed.”

Cas blinked at him, confused, before a small, shy smile bloomed on his face.

Dean observed him for a moment, then sighed. “You wanna get out of here? We can order takeout and eat it in front of the TV,” he said. 

Cas huffed, then smiled. “We came here to meet your family. It would be a shame if we didn’t stay for dinner just because Crowley is here, too,” he said.

Dean raised his eyebrow. “You sure? I can throw him out if you want.” Castiel snorted, then shook his head.

Suddenly, they heard a knock on the door. When it opened, Sam's hairy head appeared in the room.

“I'm sorry for interrupting, I just wanted to check if everything's alright. You were gone for a long time.”

Dean felt his blood boiling. Sneaky, nosy brothers.

“Sam, for fuck's sake…” he started, but Cas interrupted before Dean could finish his rant.

“My apologies, Sam. We had a very important matter to discuss. I didn't get the chance to introduce myself, although I believe you already know my name. I'm Castiel.” He extended his hand in a greeting. Sam straightened himself and shook Cas’s palm with awe in his eyes.

“I'm Sam Winchester. It's an honor to meet you.” 

Dean rolled his eyes. “Alright, stop crowding the guy. You've got all of the evening to compliment him,” he said. 

Sam shot Dean an annoyed look. “I'm not crowding him, I'm just a big fan.” Sam turned his face to Cas again. ”And I'm sorry if inviting Crowley and Meg was a reason for your discomfort. It didn’t even cross my mind that you could know each other. Or my brother, for that matter.”

Dean only glared at him.

“Dean and I just cleared this up. He didn’t know of my um… past, and clearly, you didn’t know that the person Dean met was… well… me,” Cas said, smiling shyly.

It was Sam’s turn to look shocked. He looked at Dean, disbelief clear on his face. “You want to tell me you knew Castiel Novak, but at the same time, you didn’t know he received the Olympic Cup in 2004? Dean, what the hell?!”

Dean rolled his eyes at Sam.

“Stop fangirling, Sammy. I think we can easily continue the interrogation over dinner. We came here to eat and we’re hungry. Let’s move the party to the living room.”

Sam smiled awkwardly and nodded, then turned around and stepped out of the kitchen. Dean glanced at Cas again. “The Olympic Cup? Are you serious?” He asked quietly.

“We received it because we won the America's Cup.” Cas shrugged his shoulders, amused by Dean’s bewilderment.

Dean sighed. “Okay, sunshine, but if by the end of the evening, I find out you also won Manhunt International, I’m outta here.”

Cas snorted, then nodded and followed Sam through the door.

Once they entered the living room again, Dean noticed that Meg and Crowley were closely watching Cas's every move. Meanwhile, Sam enthusiastically began to explain which dishes were vegan. Cas nodded at him politely, then reached for the pasta, but Sam was quicker. He started putting the food on Cas's plate with a goofy smile on his face.

“So, Castiel. Please, do tell where the hell have you been all those years,” Crowley said, bringing the glass with amber fluid to his lips.

“You know, last time I checked, it was none of your business,” Cas answered him with a vicious smile, then stuffed the food into his mouth.

“Fair enough. And how is it possible that this flannel-wearing squirrel found you, but I couldn’t?” Cas narrowed his eyes at Crowley dangerously.

“Hey!” Dean interjected, then looked at his brother. “Can I fire him now?”

“It’s simple, really. I didn’t want to be found by you,” Cas responded calmly, ignoring Dean’s agitation. “You see, Crowley, I choose my company very carefully these days.”

Meg scoffed at that. “It seems you’re great at forgetting people these days, too,” she sneered. 

Castiel turned his cold gaze at her. “If I want to,” he said. Dean had never seen him so pissed. He started sweating, even if he knew that Cas’s anger wasn’t aimed at him.

“Okay, let’s uh… calm down a bit,” Sam finally said. “So, Castiel. You and Dean met in Sweden, right?”

Cas turned his gaze at Sam, his eyes softening. “Yes. Your brother was a great companion,” he glanced at Dean, smiling softly. Dean couldn’t help but smile back.

Meg huffed.

“What is your problem, lady?” Dean turned his eyes at her, but he felt Cas’s hand on his under the table. Every thought that had crossed his mind instantly evaporated.

“Nothing, Dean-o. Just watch your back. I used to be his ‘great companion’ too, back in the day. Look how it turned out now,” she said slowly with an ugly smile, looking Castiel straight in the eyes.

“Meg, what are you even doing here?” Cas asked her, letting go of Dean’s hand.

“Working, Clarence. Crowley hired me after you dumped our asses.”

“You and Crowley, working together?” Cas asked, raising his eyebrow.

“You know what they say. When the going gets tough, the tough get going.”

Suddenly, Eileen and Jack appeared in the doorway. The boy looked happy. He signed something to Eileen excitedly, then skipped to Cas.

“Dad, I met Mary and DJ and Kate, the guinea pig! They have a cool room,” he said, then sat on the chair beside them. “I’m hungry,” he added.

Cas chuckled, then reached for pasta and put the food on Jack’s plate. “I hope Sam and Eileen will let me meet DJ and Mary too,” Cas said, signing simultaneously. Dean could instantly tell he was a pro, his hands flew almost too quick for Dean to recognize what he was saying. 

“Of course. How is the pasta?” Eileen asked, smiling.

“It’s great. Thank you for preparing a vegan dish for us,” Castiel replied politely.

“No problem. It was fun, actually,” she said, sitting down beside Sam. “So, what did I miss?”

Sam readjusted his chair and started to sign quickly. Cas chuckled when Eileen’s eyes started to grow wider with every word.

“Castiel, let’s forget about our… misunderstandings for a moment. Please, satisfy my curiosity and tell us, what did you do for all those years? There is just no way the great Angel of Alinghi stopped sailing altogether,” Crowley said, smirking.

Cas glanced at him, then focused on his pasta again. “I didn’t stop sailing. I’m just not racing anymore.”

“Is that so?” Crowley asked, then his gaze fell on Jack. “And what about this young man? Did you decide to just reproduce and retire?”

Castiel shot him an angry look. “Watch your mouth, Crowley,” he growled.

“Of course, no need to get angry, my feathered friend. However, I can’t help but notice that the opportunity presents itself and I’m just a simple salesman. You, my dear Angel, are a valuable asset. Is there any possibility that you would be willing to get back in the game?”

Cas sighed, then looked at Crowley in disbelief. 

“You’re ridiculous. I’m almost forty. What possible asset could I be for you now?”

Crowley squinted his eyes dangerously, then smirked.

“Let’s just say I have a few ideas.”

“Crowley, I’m not going to race for you again.”

“Fair enough. I’m not going to ask you to. Don't worry your beautiful head about it,” Crowley finished, then sipped his drink again. He looked strangely satisfied with the turn of events.

“So, Castiel, how did it feel to win the last race?” Sam interjected, his eyes wide.

“Um. It was a long time ago. But uh…” Cas glanced at Meg, who finally smiled a little. “...I guess it was incredible.”

“Hmm… We felt like we owned the world,” she added quietly. “I think we shouted so loud that you actually couldn't talk for a while, Clarence.”

“That’s right, I lost my voice for a few days,” Cas chuckled. Meg looked at him fondly. 

Dean's jaw tightened. He felt a sudden surge of discomfort spread through him like wildfire. 

“This is amazing. We need to like, meet and you have to tell me everything about that race,” Sam said excitedly. Castiel chuckled, then glanced at Dean.

“If Dean doesn’t mind, I’m sure we could think of something.”

Dean nodded and forced a smile, taking a sip of his water. Cas looked at him strangely, examining his face.

“Dean tells me you’re sailing as a skipper? Do you sail during winter, too?” Sam asked again, getting Cas's attention.

“No, I’m only sailing during the season now. I mainly work as a translator during the rest of the months.”

“Didn’t you study economics or something, Clarence?” Meg interjected.

“You have a good memory. After my bachelor's, I switched to linguistics for my master's degree.”

“Yeah, I remember you knew French. When you didn't want us all to understand what you were saying to Balthazar, you guys always switched to French.”

Dean suddenly remembered the name from their time at the Baltic Sea. It was a guy on the ‘Rose’ sailboat that Cas had talked to via VHF. He glanced at Cas, who shook his head discreetly. 

Okay then. Another secret, apparently.  

“The old bat vanished right after you did,” Meg said, sipping from her glass.

“Is that so?” Castiel asked politely.

“Dean, will you show me Baby?” Jack suddenly asked, looking at Dean expectantly.

Dean smiled at the kid. “Sure thing, bud. If you want to, we can even sail on her tomorrow.”

“I’d like that. Dad says she’s pretty.”

“Really?” Dean asked slowly, glancing at Cas. Was his friend actually  blushing  a little? Dean smirked, then looked back at Jack. “She’s the most beautiful boat you’ll ever see, Jack.”

“Your never-ending love for this boat almost melts my cold heart,” Crowley added, smiling wryly. 

“It could, if you actually had one,” Dean responded flatly.

“Guys, please,” Sam interjected, trying to get his guests under control again.

“Clarence, you do know you almost didn’t age?” Meg asked, looking at Cas with interest. Why she was calling him that, Dean didn’t know. He also didn’t want to stay here and watch her sending Cas flirtatious looks, so he turned to Jack, who had finished eating.

“You wanna hang out with the kids, bud? We can draw something with them.”

“Okay,” Jack responded, then stood up. Dean followed him to the kid’s room, not looking back.

“Uncle Dean!” DJ shouted when they entered. He was playing with his toys on the carpet.

“Hey, squid!” Dean approached the little boy and hugged him, then waved at Mary, who smiled shyly from her dollhouse. “Hello, princess. I brought a friend with me today. You’ve met Jack already,” Dean glanced at the boy, standing behind him. “Let’s play together.”

“Can we paint?” Mary asked quietly.

“Sure we can. Let’s look for some paper.”

+

“Dean?” He heard Cas’s voice coming from the hall.

“In here!” Dean shouted. Some time ago, they switched from painting to building the highest tower possible. Jack and DJ were developing a strategy together, while Mary supplied them with new bricks. Dean was the one who actually built the damn thing, but he didn’t really mind.

“What an impressive tower,” Cas said from behind him, entering the room. 

“Right? If I didn't build boats, I’d like to be a Lego engineer.”

“The Lego business would benefit a lot, I'm sure.”

“Gee, thank’s Cas. Did you leave the demons with my brother?”

Castiel smirked. “You’re not a big fan of Meg and Crowley, I assume.”

“What gave me away?”

“Your incredible personality,” Cas said grinning. Dean rolled his eyes, but couldn't stop a smile forming at his lips. 

“Who are you?” Mary asked Cas, suddenly materializing in front of him. 

“That’s my Dad. He’s cool,” Jack said without even looking up at them. Mary glanced at Dean suspiciously.

“He’s okay, princess,” Dean assured her. 

The girl seemed satisfied with this. “Hello, Jack’s Dad,” she said, then ran to get more bricks.

“I think she has just accepted you into the tribe. Congratulations,” Dean said.

“I’m flattered,” Cas said softly, then sat down on the carpet. “Why did you run away from the living room, Dean?”

Dean turned his head to glance at Cas, then focused on the bricks again. 

 Because I feel like shit when somebody flirts with you. 

“Adults are boring. Besides, you just did the same thing.”

“I did, didn’t I?” Cas said quietly, then looked around. “You’re exceptionally good with children, Dean.”

“My brother says it’s because I'm mentally their age.”

Cas chuckled softly, then observed how Dean joined the next elements on the tower.

“So, you wanna sail with me and Jack tomorrow?” Dean asked after a moment.

“I’d like that very much,” Cas responded, smiling.

“Great. A few weeks back we took the furling drum off, so we need to install the jib before we sail out.” Dean looked at Cas, thinking. ”I guess we can just sail for the whole day. We could eat dinner on Baby. Hell, we could even sleep there.”

“I don’t see why not,” Cas said, then paused. A subtle hitch in his breath indicated he wanted to say more.

“Spit it out, Angel.”

“I uh… I just want to make sure you’re not angry with me, Dean. I cherish our friendship - very much so. I want you to know that,” he said quietly.

Dean looked at Cas's face again – his plush lips and messy hair. His gaze finally settled on Cas's ocean eyes. Cas had a way of looking at him that left him unsure of what to think, and yet he couldn't get enough of it.

Dean felt like he was drowning, lost in the depths of the infinite blue. His heart beat a little faster in his ribcage.

Maybe Charlie had been right. Maybe Dean was overanalyzing everything too much. Would it be so bad if he just kissed the guy, there and then?

"You think I'm angry?" He asked quietly. "Cas, I'm not angry. If anything, I'm... I'm…” he hesitated, searching for the right words.

 He said friendship, you moron. Friendship, nothing else. 

Dean broke the intense eye contact and cleared his throat.

“We’re good, Cas. Just… let’s tell each other life-changing stuff before the situation will force us to do so, okay?”

Castiel winced. “Um…”

Dean sighed. “What now? Did you kill someone, too?”

DJ sucked in his breath behind Dean. 

“No! Uncle Dean was joking,” Cas told the boy, then looked at Dean, panicked. “Tell him you’re joking, Dean.”

“Alright, alright,” Dean turned to the kids. “It was a joke. A bad one, for that matter. Cas is a good man,” He said, then added “probably” under his breath. Cas punched him in the shoulder.

“Ow!” Dean yelped, then tried to slap Cas’s hand, but the guy was too quick.

“Don’t fight! Dad says it’s not good to solve your problems like this,” DJ said, eyeing Dean and Cas suspiciously.

“You’re right. My apologies,” said Castiel, trying to hold back his laughter. He turned his head to Dean. “We’ll talk later,” he added quietly, then stood up and held out his hand. “Come on, Uncle Dean. I actually came to tell you the pie is on the table.”

Dean’s eyes went wide. He grabbed Cas’s hand to pull himself up, then rushed to the living room.

Crowley and Meg were nowhere to be seen.

“Did the demons go away?” Dean asked, putting a large portion of the pie on his plate. Eileen had made it vegan today. 

Sam made a face. “Why can’t you be nice, for once?”

“What do you mean? I’m always nice,” Dean responded, his mouth full of pastry. Sam rolled his eyes at him.

“They’re going to stay here for a couple of days, I’m going to meet them tomorrow at the office,” his brother said.

“Great,” Dean grumbled under his breath. 

“Um, Sam?” Cas said from the doorway. When Dean turned his head that way, he saw that his friend was holding a bag in his hand. He spoke again, smiling. “I wanted to thank you for inviting us for dinner. I heard you like whisky,” he said, handing Sam the bag. Dean’s brother looked as if he had just received the most precious gift in the world. 

“Thank you, Castiel. You didn't have to. We were genuinely looking forward to meeting you. Even if Dean didn’t know who you were before,” Sam paused, making a face at Dean, ”he told us so much about you.”

“Did he?” Cas asked, smirking, then glanced at Dean. 

“Only that you snore, don’t worry,” Dean grinned. Cas narrowed his eyes at him. 

Dean huffed. “Stop trying to intimidate me and eat a pie, dude. It’s vegan.”

Cas looked at Eileen, surprised. “Really? Thank you for making it, then,” he said. 

“No problem, Cas. I hope you’ll like it,” she responded.

“Actually, I wanted to ask you about your diet. How did it happen?” Asked Sam, who sat on the couch beside Eileen. 

“Um, it was Jack’s idea, he wanted to try it a while ago. We have been eating plant-based ever since,” Cas said, sitting at the table. 

“That’s great. Perhaps you'll be able to persuade my brother that vegetables are edible.”

Cas turned his head to Dean and smirked. “Maybe I will,” he said.

The rest of the evening passed pleasantly. Without Meg and Crowley around, Dean could finally relax. Sam wanted to know everything about Cas’s career and Cas was interested in Sam’s progress in the company's development.

“What are your plans for the next few days, guys?” Sam asked some time later.

“Jack wants to see some castles, so I think we could start with Sintra castle during the weekend,” Dean said, then looked at Cas. “I wanted to do it tomorrow, but Jack said he wants to see Baby, too. I guess we've got plenty of time to see everything anyway.” When Cas nodded, Dean continued looking at Sam again. ”We actually decided to take Baby on a swing. We want to sail out tomorrow morning. We’re gonna be back on Wednesday evening, I guess.”

“You’re going to sail? With Castiel?” Sam asked, frowning.

Dean grimaced. “Yeah, Sammy. What kind of non-existent problem do you have with this?”

“I mean… It’s just that…” Sam said, glancing at Cas. “Do you even want to sail with Dean?”

“Um. Yes,” Cas said dryly. Dean snorted, causing Sam to make a face at him again.

“I’m just… You know what? Never mind,” Sam said, smiling awkwardly before continuing. “And would you maybe like to uh… see our company when you guys are back?”

“Of course, Sam,” Castiel responded politely.

“Great! Come to the office on Thursday, then.” 

Cas nodded again, smiling at Dean’s brother.

Dean glanced at his watch. It was getting late. “Okay, we should probably head home,” he said, standing up. “Thanks for the dinner, guys. I think we could make another one at my place. I’ll call you.”

“Sure, Dean. No problem,” Sam looked at his brother, then at Cas. “Thank you for visiting us. If living at Dean's turns out to be boring or annoying, you and Jack are always welcome here.”

“Hey!” Dean protested, furrowing his brows at Sam. Cas snorted beside him.

+

Dean sat on his blue sofa with a glass of whisky in his hand. He looked out of the window, observing the stars visible in the night sky and sipping his drink from time to time. He tried to sort out the thoughts swirling in his head, but it had never been his strong suit.

So much had happened today, although Dean’s main concern wasn’t Cas’s past and all the awards he had won. It wasn't Dean's style to be swayed by such things, anyway. 

The real problem was, Dean’s brain had this bright idea to kiss Cas while sitting on the carpet at his brother’s house. Hell, he had almost done it. He could swear he had leaned a little bit forward, even.

So the thing was, Dean really liked to be near Cas. He wanted to talk to him, prepare his favorite meals, and show him good movies and music. He wanted to experience very basic things with this man, that didn’t seem basic at all if he thought of doing them together with Cas. 

With each passing day, Castiel’s presence in Dean’s life was more significant, and Dean suspected by now that a simple crush turned into… a feeling.

And Dean was really, really bad at feelings.

It didn’t change the fact that the feeling was there, making his heart jump with joy at the sight of ocean eyes and messy hair.

He closed his eyes. 

Castiel and Jack were currently under his roof, and they would stay there for the next three weeks. They were here on vacation, dammit. This was neither the time nor the place to focus on his own wishes or strange, jumpy feelings. Castiel had been clear today, he had said it out loud. He wanted friendship, and Dean should take whatever he could get. He couldn’t let these… emotions or whatever… consume him, especially not while Cas was living here, with him, he decided. 

So why does he keep looking at you like that, sometimes? 

He took another sip of whisky, feeling the burn down his throat.

"Mind if I join you?" He suddenly heard a deep voice coming from the stairs. When he opened his eyes and turned his gaze that way, he saw a smile playing on Cas’s lips. Dean nodded. 

The room was bathed in the soft glow of the night. Castiel sat on the other side of the sofa with his own glass. For a moment, they sat in companionable silence, watching the stars.

“So, you wanted to talk?” Dean asked, glancing at his friend.

“Yes,” Cas replied quietly. “I should probably start by saying that I'm very sorry I didn't tell you about the America's Cup earlier. You have to believe I was planning on doing this anyway, regardless of today's events.”

“I believe you. Stop apologizing for it, Cas. To be fair, I didn't tell you everything about my company right away either. Water under the bridge.” He took a sip of his whisky. “Castiel Novak. I actually googled you ten minutes ago. With all the races you've won, it's no wonder my brother is a huge fan of yours. And I don't know how you did it, but you hid your kid well. There is no mention of Jack Novak anywhere.”

“Jack isn't a Novak. He's got his mom's last name, Kline. And it isn't exactly for his protection. I just wanted him to feel her presence in his life,” Cas admitted, smiling softly.

“I get it,” Dean said, nodding. After a moment, he added, “It’s kinda cool that I know someone famous, y’know?” 

Castiel chuckled, looking at his glass. “I could say the same about you. I still can’t believe I sailed on the Singer & Winchesters boat. Your vessels are widely known for being incredibly well-made. No wonder that the Impala looks so good. She’s practically your flagship unit.”

Dean studied his friend's face for a moment. “I mean, I didn’t put our brand anywhere on her. Crowley wants me to do it, though.”

“Yes, I was wondering about that. I figured you must’ve had a reason.” Cas said, glancing at Dean.

“She’s my home, Cas, not some advertisement,” Dean said.

Castiel nodded with a soft expression on his face. “I actually wanted to tell you something else, too. You probably remember Balthazar, the captain we met on our way to Kiel. Meg mentioned him today.” Dean nodded. He had been wondering if Cas would tell him about that.

“He’s the only person from my old team who knew what really happened. When I decided to quit, he did too. He cut himself off from the team, but he and I stayed in touch. Crowley is probably still looking for him.”

“So you don’t want to make it easier for him to find Balthazar?”

“Yes. He had his own reasons for hiding from him. He was never friends with Crowley or any other member of the team except me.”

“Okay. Balthy’s whereabouts are safe with me, then.”

Castiel nodded once, then sipped from his glass. 

“What will you do now that Crowley knows where you are?” Dean asked after a moment of silence.

“I’m not sure. I guess we’ll see.” Cas responded, lost in thoughts. Then, he added, ”he can't make me do anything. So many years have passed, and I'm not the same person I used to be back then. All he could really do is try to persuade me to perform in some kind of detergent commercial.”

Dean grinned as he imagined his friend on TV, shirt buttoned, sleeves rolled up, explaining all the benefits of some cleaning product or detergent. Dean would probably buy it, no questions asked.

“When you left the room with Jack, Crowley told us that Meg would be staying in your company on his behalf for a while. He’s planning a large-scale advertising campaign for Singer & Winchesters,” Cas continued.

Dean winced. The last thing he needed was Meg anywhere near them. He could practically smell her ulterior motives a mile away. ”Where did this chick come from, anyway?” He asked, shaking his head.

“Actually, she’s not that bad. We used to get along quite well, back in the day. She's a little rough, but she's a good sailor. I’m surprised she wanted to stick with Crowley, she had a bright sailing future ahead of her," Cas said, cocking his head to the side.

Dean tried very hard not to think about how exactly Cas  got along  with the she-demon. He sighed, looking out the window again.

“Where do you want to sail tomorrow?” Cas asked him a few beats later. Dean glanced in his direction again.

“I actually have an idea. We could take our swimsuits and drop the anchor near a small island, I bet Jack would love it. It’s really pretty, with a beach and all. What do you think?” Dean asked.

“It sounds lovely. What is it called?”

“Saint Martin. About 70 miles from here, but I think it’s gonna be worth it.”

“Alright. Did you check the weather forecast yet?”

“Yeah. It doesn’t look super crazy, but we're talking about the ocean here. How does Jack react to the waves?”

“Sailing makes him sleepy, mostly, but he's never been on the ocean. I have medicine for him, just in case.”

“Okay, that’s good. Do you think we could sail out in the morning?”

“Of course. That won’t be a problem.” Cas responded, looking Dean deep in the eyes. “I’m really excited to sail with you again.”

Dean smirked. “With me or on Baby? Be honest.”

Cas looked down and shook his head, smiling. “Dean,” he started, then looked back up, his ocean eyes sincere. “Your boat is beautiful, there’s no doubt about that, but the truth is, I don’t give a damn what I sail, as long as it’s with you. I really enjoy your company. You don’t seem to believe me, even when I keep telling you so,” he said gently. 

Dean’s mouth parted. He scanned Cas’s face for any signs of dishonesty but found none. He felt warmth spreading through his chest. 

Who even says shit like that? 

The problem was that Dean's poor little heart, which was currently trying to jump out of his chest, had yet again heard something completely different than what Cas had probably meant.

God, I'm hopeless. 

He swallowed, trying to find words. Any would suffice at this point.

“Okay. Let’s… let’s get some sleep. We need to wake up early,” he finally managed, avoiding any eye contact. He couldn't handle any more emotions today.

“As you wish, Dean,” he heard Cas saying, his voice smooth.

Dean finished his drink, then stood up and rushed upstairs to his bedroom, trying to calm his frantic heartbeat. 

+

“Your lifejacket stays on, no matter what, are we clear?”

“Yes, Dean.”

“Okay. As you move around the deck, one of your hands is always touching the boat. And I mean always.”

“Okay.”

“If you have any problem or question, ask me or your Dad. We’re here to help you. Capiche?”

“I capiche.”

“Fantastic. Cas, do the honors.”

Dean glanced at grinning Castiel, his eyes behind sunglasses. He stood with arms crossed in the cockpit as Dean explained the basics to Jack. Cas was wearing shorts today, showing off all his leg muscles. Dean had trouble focusing on anything else, but he kept telling himself to stay strong.

“Does it mean I can sail out?” Cas asked, lifting one eyebrow.

“Yes. Do it, before I change my mind," Dean responded.

“Okay. Will you take care of the fenders and lines for me?” Cas said, starting the engine.

Dean nodded, moving to the bow with Jack. He instructed the boy, step by step, how to make sure the fenders and lines were in a good position.

Once they sailed out from the marina, Dean showed Jack how to coil the rope and knot it on a cleat. The boy looked interested so far, so Dean decided to teach him how to install and operate the jib, too. They returned to the cockpit when Baby started rocking on the ocean waves. It was time to hoist the sails.

“We start with the mainsail, bud. You’ll operate the winch handle. Don’t worry, I’ll help you," Dean said, then went below the deck to retrieve the device. When he was back, he nodded to Cas, who turned the Impala into the wind. Meanwhile, Dean put the halyard on the winch and installed the winch handle.

“Alright. Now turn it with all the power you’ve got. You ready?” He asked Jack, who nodded. The boy looked determined. Dean grinned, then pulled the line to make it easier for the kid. When the mainsail was half up, Dean switched with Jack to finish the job.

“Great. Let’s do the same with the jib, then.”

Once both of the sails were flapping in the wind, Dean moved to the sheets, trimming the sails optimally for conditions.

“Now your Dad has to steer us away from the wind. The boat will heel but don’t worry, it’s safe," Dean reassured Jack, who nodded again. When Cas turned the engine off and Baby finally gained some speed, Jack started giggling.

“How fast can we go?” He asked, after a moment of observing the waves.

Dean glanced at Cas. “Let’s find out,” he said, then stood up and took over the steering wheel. Castiel smiled at him, then walked to the sheets, doing his thing. Like a well-oiled machine, the Impala obediently moved faster.

“Wheee!” Jack exclaimed, amused by the waves rocking the hull. “This is fun!”

Dean observed the boy for a moment. His blonde hair was ruffled by the wind and he smiled widely. He was a nice kid, full of joy and wonder. Dean had no trouble getting along with him at all. He glanced at Cas, who observed him with a fond smile. 

“What?” He asked his friend. Cas only smiled wider and shook his head.

Thirty minutes later Jack started yawning, so Cas decided to give him medicine, just in case. Then, he walked below the deck to prepare something for breakfast.

“Why did you want to build boats, Dean?” Jack asked after some time.

“I was good at it. I like building stuff, I guess. Do you know what you wanna do when you grow up?”

Jack looked at him, his blue eyes wide. 

“I want to help people! Or animals, I’m not sure yet. Dad’s friend, Benjamin, is a doctor, but he is always tired. I don’t want to be tired all the time.”

Dean felt an unpleasant pang in his chest. Apparently, Jack knew this Benjamin person too, but even if he was curious, Dean couldn’t let himself violate Cas’s privacy by interrogating his son.

“I see. You could always be a vet, y’know?”

Jack nodded. “I’m thinking about it. Dad says I have a lot of time to decide.”

“Yeah, he’s right. You should enjoy being a kid for now.”

Jack furrowed his brow. “But I’m not a kid anymore.”

Dean grinned. “Sure you are. Come here, I’ll show you how to steer a boat.”

+

“So when I turn right, the sails will go left and I would have to pull the sheets on the left?”

“Very good. And what do we call the left side on a boat, kid?”

“Port side?”

“You’re getting the hang of it! Okay, let’s tack,” Dean said, standing up from his seat on a bench. Jack had clung to the steering wheel, much to Dean’s delight, and seemed fascinated by everything he saw. Half an hour ago, they had finally spotted the outline of the Cíes Islands on the horizon and now they had to change their course for the last time before they could drop the anchor.

“Okay, Jack. We’ll take care of the sheets, you just have to stop Baby when the sails change sides. You ready?”

“Yes!”

“Okay, let’s go.” 

Dean released the jib sheet on the starboard, while Cas pulled the one on the port side. Jack turned the steering wheel, then stopped the Impala exactly where he was supposed to, without any prompting from Dean.

“Cas, the kid is a friggin’ natural. He could easily surpass you if he wanted to.”

“Hmm… Yes, it looks like you’re right.” Cas said quietly, then added louder, turning to the boy, ”Jack? Are you having fun?”

“It’s nice! I like Baby.”

Dean grinned happily. “I think she likes you too, kiddo. Alright, do you think you can stay here alone for a moment and steer her? Your Dad and me need to prepare the anchor.”

Jack nodded, focused on holding a straight course. His tongue peeked out from the corner of his mouth and a determined gleam appeared in his eyes. Meanwhile, Dean fastened himself to the jackstay and started moving to the bow. Cas did the same on the other side of the deck.

“I’m glad he didn’t get sick, after all. He looked a little pale after we ate the first time, but it passed,” Cas said quietly so only Dean could hear him when they met in the middle.

“Yeah. Steering helps with sickness, and he doesn't wanna let go of the wheel,” Dean said, chuckling, then glanced at Castiel. “I think the mission is a success.”

“Yes, it appears so,” Cas said, glancing at Jack.

“I can get you a discount on this boat you wanted to buy, chuckles,” Dean said, smirking. 

Castiel looked back at him and grinned. “Oh, really?” He asked, cocking his eyebrow playfully.

“Yeah! I can be nice if I want to, y'know?”

“If you say so,” Cas said, still grinning, then focused on the anchor. Meanwhile, Dean looked around, making sure they wouldn't sail into any obstacle. After a beat, he said, “Jack’s gonna love jumping from the boat into the water.”

“So am I. I can’t wait to do it. Those islands look really exotic," Cas admitted, looking at the anchor chain. “I think we’re set.”

“Daaaaaaaaaad!” Jack shrieked “A dolphin!”

Dean turned his head to the right, where the gray back of the animal just emerged from the water. 

“Look at that…” said Cas in awe. 

Soon, another one appeared next to the first dolphin. It seemed like they were racing the Impala. Dean chuckled, then went back to the steering wheel so Jack could join Cas on the port side.

“Whoa! Record them, Dad!” Jack exclaimed, leaning on the guard rail, his eyes wide.

“Okay, but hold on to something, Jack, so you don't fall out.”

+

The Impala was safely anchored on the east side of Saint Martin Island, away from other boats. Dean and Cas had prepared a special ladder made of rope, so it would be easier for them to come back on the deck. 

When Dean saw Cas wearing nothing but his swim shorts, his mouth went completely dry. He had already been tortured by the sight of Cas’s toned thighs all day long, and now he had to see his perfectly sculpted and tanned abs as well. He looked away before Cas noticed the color on his cheeks.

“This is heaven,” Cas stated, looking around.

Dean had to agree. The Island, or rather a small archipelago of three Cies Islands, was undoubtedly stunning. The sheer contrast between almost white sand and turquoise water looked otherworldly, and surrounding the area hills and lagoons made the scenery even more captivating.

“Dad, c’mon. I want to jump into the water already,” Jack rushed him. 

Cas nodded. “Dean, are you coming?”

Stand there a moment longer and I just might. 

“In a minute, Cas. You guys go first," he said, smiling awkwardly. When Cas finally turned his back to him, Dean could clearly see his beautiful tattoo.

“Okay, let’s jump," Cas said to Jack, then put his hands above his head, spreading the wings. He graciously dove head-first into the clean water. Jack followed shortly after him, giggling loudly.

Dean chuckled, observing them for a moment. Jack chased his dad, but before he could catch him, Cas escaped.

A few beats later Dean decided to finally join them. As he plunged into the water, he felt the soothing cold spreading over his bare skin. 

“Oh sweet Lord, this is incredible," he said the moment he emerged, wiping the salty water off his face. He looked around and saw Jack climbing the ladder to jump again. When his eyes landed on Cas, he noticed his friend looking at him with a strange expression on his face. Dean raised an eyebrow, smirking. Maybe Jack couldn't, but Dean certainly could catch the bastard. He started swimming towards Cas with a predatory smile. His friend frowned, but then his eyes widened and he started swimming away from Dean. It was too late to escape.

“Gotcha, Angel!” Dean shouted when he managed to catch Cas’s ankle, feeling a pleasant jolt of excitement. Cas laughed, pulling his leg and trying to break free from the grip. Dean followed the movement, losing his balance in the process. Before his face could hit the water, he felt a hand on his bicep, pulling him up and into Cas's naked torso.

“Are you alright?” Cas asked quietly. Dean looked up. Their faces were extremely close. He could clearly see each of Cas's eyelashes and make out the colors of the ocean dancing in his eyes. He felt the warmth of Cas's body against his skin.

He wasn't alright. He wasn't sure if he would ever be alright again. 

“Yeah,” he managed to rasp. Cas nodded, then finally let go of him, but otherwise, he didn't move. Dean didn't either, staring into the depths of Cas’s eyes.

“I should check on Jack,” Cas said quietly after a moment, breaking the weighted silence between them.

“Sure,” Dean said, trying to calm himself down again. He turned his gaze at Baby, looking for a distraction. “I'm gonna check her hull while I'm in the water,” he added and swam towards his boat.

 Shit , he thought. It just kept happening, his brain logging out happily whenever Cas was really close. 

Cas and Jack played in the ocean a bit longer. Soon, the sun began to set and the entire island was enveloped in orange light. Meanwhile, Dean went back on the Impala and started drying himself.

“Dean, we’re going to swim to the beach," Cas shouted from the water after a moment.

“Okay, I’ll start dinner, then," Dean stated before going below the deck to put on dry clothes.

30 minutes later Cas and Jack were back on the deck, drying off with towels, and Dean had almost finished the Mapo Tofu. When everything was ready, he took the steaming bowls outside and served them to the guests.

“Thank you,” Jack said, digging in.

“It smells great, as always,” Cas stated, inhaling the food.

“So, how was the island, guys?” Dean asked after the sounds of eating faded away a bit.

“We’ve seen a crab!” Jack replied with a sparkle in his eyes.

“Really? That’s cool, bud. If you like sailing like that, we could easily sail to Madeira next,” Dean said, then added, “hell, we could sail to the Canary Islands. I mean, why not?” He glanced at Cas. His friend had a strange expression on his face again. There was a hint of vulnerability, but Dean couldn't exactly pinpoint anything else. It was like trying to catch a fleeting glimpse of something just beyond reach.

Finally, Cas's face landed on a little, sweet smile. “I’d really like that, Dean,” he said, his voice steady.

Dean smiled back. “Yeah?” He asked, then looked at Jack. “What about you, kiddo?”

“I want to go with you, too! And I want to see more dolphins and crabs!”

“Okay, so it’s settled then,” Dean said, holding out an open hand to Jack, who gave him a high five.

Once they ate, Cas collected the plates and went below the deck to wash the dishes, leaving Jack and Dean under the sky slowly filling with stars. Dean looked up, searching the shiny dots for a familiar sight. He spotted Arcturus soon after. 

“Hey, Jack, we can actually sleep on the deck, if you want.”

“Really?”

“Yeah. It’s warm and nice.”

“Do you think my Dad will allow me to do it?”

“I don’t see why not. I’ll stay here with you.”

“Cool,” Jack said, nodding. He looked at the sky again.

“Okay, the dishes are clean,” Cas said, emerging on the deck a moment later. He looked up as well. “This is breathtaking,” he whispered, then sat down on the bench beside Jack. 

The three of them observed the night sky for a while, mesmerized by its beauty. After some time Jack leaned on Cas’s shoulder. 

“Dad, can I sleep here with Dean?”

“You want to sleep outside?”

“Yes! Can I? Please!”

Cas glanced at Dean and raised an eyebrow. 

“C’mon, let him stay on the deck. He’s got a vacation too, you know,” Dean said, chuckling.

Cas sighed. “Alright, then.” He glanced at Jack. “But you have to behave and listen to Dean.”

“Okay. I will.”

“Good. We need to find your sleeping bag.”

+

When Dean opened his eyes the next day, he first noticed the gray sky surrounding them. Then he realized that the temperature had slightly dropped. He shivered, then looked at Jack, sleeping soundly at the bench on the other side of the deck. The boy, now tightly wrapped in his sleeping bag, looked like a giant caterpillar. 

Dean sat down, then stretched and winced. He had somehow forgotten that sleeping on the hard bench would be painful for his slowly, but steadily aging body. He looked around, then stood up, carefully opened the Impala’s door, and glanced below the deck. Castiel took his usual spot in the fore cabin, so Dean turned around and opened the door to his empty room. There was no need for Jack to stay out in the cold, he thought. Dean went back on the deck, then gently picked the sleeping boy up and moved him to the comfortable bed. When he closed the door to the cabin, he glanced at his phone and saw a short text message from Sammy:

“ We need to talk. ” 

Dean frowned, then started typing.

“ About what? ”

His brother didn’t respond right away, so Dean decided to ignore him for now and moved to the kitchen area. It was quite early, but since the weather was not great, there was no real reason for them to stay here any longer. When his coffee was ready, Dean headed back outside and started the engine.

+

About an hour later, Dean saw a movement in the companionway. 

“I can see you started the party without me,” Cas said, smiling. He had a mug in his hands, undoubtedly filled with hot coffee. He looked sleepy and his hair was in its usual mess.

“I figured I would let you guys sleep a little longer. Nothing earth-shattering going on here,” Dean informed him.

“Yes, I can tell by now you do that quite often. Don’t worry, you won’t see me complaining,” Cas grinned, then sipped his coffee. “How was the night under the stars?”

“Painful. The damn bench is definitely not comfortable,” Dean chuckled.

“I was actually wondering why you volunteered for this task.”

“You know why. Don’t you remember your first night on a sailboat under the stars?”

“It’s hard to forget," Cas murmured. “I want to thank you, Dean. For everything you’re doing. I can’t remember seeing Jack so excited.”

“Cas, the kid wouldn't be half as excited if you weren't here with him.”

“You are exceptionally resistant to accepting compliments, you know that?” Cas asked, narrowing his eyes at Dean.

“You think so?” Dean asked, grinning. Cas only shook his head and took another sip of his coffee.

“So, you really wanna see our company tomorrow? I don’t want to bore you guys to death. Sammy’s ideas are weird sometimes.”

“I’d like to go if you don’t mind.”

"Okay, I must warn you, though. We'll probably see Charlie, and she really wants to meet you guys. For some reason, she believes you two will become best friends instantly.”

+

The rest of their sailing was uneventful. Jack wanted to steer Baby on their way back too, so Dean’s role was mainly limited to making sure the boy held the straight course. He also showed Jack how to fill out the logbook, and since then, every hour, the boy marched below the deck to write down the coordinates and weather conditions.

Sam finally texted him back informing him they needed to discuss something privately before they met at the office the next day. Dean didn't understand what could be so important that his brother wouldn't just wait and talk to him at work.

When they safely berthed in the harbor (Cas wanted to do it, Dean decided to just let him), all three of them gathered in the cockpit.

“Jack”, Dean started, smiling softly. “I just wanna say that you are always welcome on Baby. It's a pleasure to have such a committed crew member.“

“Really?” The boy asked, suddenly shy. Cas placed a hand on his shoulder and smiled fondly at him.

“Yeah, bud. Did you like sailing with us?” Dean asked.

Jack nodded, then took a step forward and hugged Dean tightly.

“Alright,” Dean said, trying to contain his emotions. “Enough of that. Let’s pack and get back home.” 

When Jack finally stepped back, Dean turned his head to Cas. “I’ll make a quick call and be right back.”

“Alright. I’ll take care of the food, then. Jack, fold your sleeping bag, please,” Cas said to his son, then headed below the deck.

Dean went on the quay, then pulled out his phone, tapped on his brother’s name, and dialed the number. Sam answered immediately as if he was waiting for a call.

“Dean?”

“Yeah. What’s up?”

“Is Castiel there with you? Can he hear me?”

Dean frowned. “He can’t hear you. What’s going on?”

“Okay, good. I spoke with Crowley yesterday. We have an idea,” Sam said. He sounded nervous.

Dean rolled his eyes. “Sam, can’t it wait till tomorrow? I don’t really care what Crowley thinks.”

“No, you need to hear it before you come to the office, that’s the point.”

“You’re getting on my nerves. Spit it out or I'll hang up.”

“We want to offer Castiel a job here.”

Dean must’ve heard it wrong.

“A job where? What are you even talking about?”

“We think we should hire Castiel Novak at Singer & Winchesters.”

Chapter Text

Dean stood on the quay, phone pressed against his ear. The harbor sounds melted in the background as Sam’s words echoed in his mind.

“Are you serious, Sam?” He asked. The idea seemed surreal. He glanced back at the Impala, gently rocking on the water.

“Dead serious. We could use someone with his skills. I mean, think about it. We've been looking for someone like that for a while now.” His brother stopped, then added, “we need someone competent enough to represent us at meetings and help you with the budget. He is the perfect candidate for this position. He is famous in the sailing world, knows several languages, and even studied economics. And I think it’s a chance for Castiel, too.” 

Dean's mind raced. So many questions swirled in his head, so many concerns, but one in particular rose to the surface. What would it mean for his friendship with Cas?

You would see his ass in the suit pants, that’s what, was all that his ever-helpful brain provided him with. 

“Look, Dean, I know it's unexpected, but it's a good move. Castiel would be a valuable asset, and this could be a game-changer for all of us. I thought since he’s your friend, you should decide whether we should ask him at all, but you seem to get along pretty well. I think you’ll work well with him, too.”

Dean sighed. Sam wasn’t wrong, but Dean couldn’t help but feel scared. So many things could go sideways. On the other hand, Castiel’s current job was making him lonely and extremely tired. Maybe Sam’s idea to hire Cas here wasn’t so bad? Dean would definitely see his friend more often and Cas wouldn’t have to spend so much time away from Jack during the sailing season.

“Okay, Sammy. I hear you. I uh… I need to ask him first. We can’t just drop a bomb like that on him. I need to be sure he’s okay with the idea.” 

“Right. You know him best, so I leave it to you. Eileen declared she could take care of Jack tomorrow just so you wouldn’t have to worry about him during the meeting.”

“Yeah, okay. I’ll text you later. I need to go, we’ve just berthed.”

“Okay. Give me a heads up."

When he hung up, Dean sighed again, his gaze lingering on Cas who emerged on the deck. He decided it would be best to wait with the conversation, at least until they got home.

+

Dean glanced at his watch. Cas and Jack had vanished into their room about twenty minutes ago, and Dean had asked Cas to join him downstairs when the boy fell asleep. 

He took a sip of his tea, trying to calm his nerves. He didn’t even like tea when he wasn’t sailing, he thought. 

The more Dean mulled over Sam's idea, the better it sounded. Truthfully, Dean would love to have Cas close all the time. Working together would undoubtedly add a layer of complexity to their bond, but the situation was already complicated. This way, at least, Dean would have Cas by his side. He sipped his tea again, grimacing at the taste. Suddenly, he heard a chuckle coming from the stairs.

"Why do you drink it if you don’t like it?' Cas asked, approaching the table.

“I guess I don’t want to drink booze every day. My liver can't handle it,” Dean responded, observing his friend with a small smile.

Cas grinned, taking a seat across from Dean. “Smart. Perhaps you should find a different tea, then? There are plenty to choose from.”

“Yeah, I don’t know shit about tea, Cas.”

“Okay then. I can help you with that.”

Dean chuckled, shaking his head. “Listen, man, I appreciate your input on my choice of beverage, but we need to talk about something else.”

Cas raised an eyebrow, his grin fading into a more serious expression. “What is it, Dean?”

“It’s nothing bad, I swear. I talked to Sam earlier today. He and Crowley came up with an idea while we were away. They want to meet with you tomorrow and discuss it, but I think it would be better if you knew what’s going on before we actually go there.”

Cas furrowed his brow. “Okay?”

“Okay.” Dean took a deep breath. “So, uh… Sammy kinda wants to hire you. At Singer & Winchesters.”

Cas stared at Dean for a moment, his face blank. Dean didn’t know if it was a good or a bad sign, but he waited patiently for any reaction from his friend.

“Hire me?” Cas repeated in disbelief after a beat. “In what role?”

“I don’t know the details yet. Sam only told me something about handling meetings and helping with the budget.” Dean looked at his mug, suddenly shy. “I uh… I spoke with him a few weeks ago. We are kinda looking for someone who would help us with some of our assignments.” He looked at Cas again and winced. “Mostly mine. But, uh, Sammy’s gonna need some time with baby number three when it finally gets here, and Benny’s wife, Andrea, is pregnant, too. We could really use your help, man.”

Cas broke into a small smile, a glint of surprise in his eyes. He looked down.

”It's unexpected,” he started, then looked back at Dean. “I’m not sure what to say. I really appreciate the thought, but I'll have to think about it, Dean.”

“Yeah, that’s totally understandable. Take your time, Cas,” Dean said, looking at his friend, then added, chuckling, “you know, if you would say yes, we could watch many movies together.”

Cas's gaze softened. “That’s true,” he admitted, then fell silent. After a moment, he asked, “does the ‘Singer’ name in ‘Singer & Winchesters’ belong to Bobby?”

“Yeah, that’s my old man. But he’s no longer active in the company, not anymore. He still owns one-third of the shares, but he left the management of the whole thing to us.”

“Alright. What about Benny?”

“Yeah, he’s our partner. And Charlie is responsible for the whole IT department.”

“I see.” Cas nodded, then looked at the table. “I have to hear the offer before I decide anything. And I need to talk to Jack, that’s his life, too.”

“Sure thing. No pressure, man. It's a tough decision, I get it. Just remember that uh… You're not alone in this, y'know? We can figure this out together.”

Cas smiled at him. “Thank you, Dean.”

“Anytime, Cas.”

+

A quiet knock on the door woke him up. Dean slowly opened his eyes and blinked, then looked around. Cas was standing in his doorway, his gaze sheepish. Dean frowned, then glanced at his watch. 6:23 in the fucking morning.

“Um… I’m sorry to wake you up, Dean, but I just realized that I wasn't prepared for any business meetings during our visit here.”

“Okay?” Dean rasped, not sure what was going on.

Cas hesitated for a moment. “I’ve got nothing to wear.”

“Oh,” Dean said, then ran a hand over his face. “Maybe you can wear my clothes, then. I mean, you’ve got those nice jeans, we only need a shirt and uh… jacket?”

Cas raised one eyebrow, evidently amused now. “Which of my jeans do you think are nice, Dean?“

“You look good in all of them, but the black ones are, uh...” 

Hugging your ass perfectly. Don’t say that out loud, though. 

Dean’s frown deepened. It was too early for this shit, his brain wasn’t fully awake yet.

Cas smirked. “Alright, I can wear the dark jeans. Will you lend me a shirt and a jacket?”

“Sure, man. The closet is yours. Pick whatever you like,” Dean said closing his eyes again. He heard Castiel's footsteps and the rustle of clothes. Some of them seemed to even land on his bed. Dean soon fell back to sleep, too tired to care.

The next time he woke up, he felt a hand on his shoulder, gently shaking him back to consciousness.

“Dean, I need you to help me choose the tie.”

Dean opened one eye, glaring at his friend, but the moment he saw his dark blue shirt over those toned arms, he was wide awake. Their chests must have been similar, but Cas was wider than Dean, so the material was a little tight around his torso and biceps. He wore his dark jeans and held three different ties in his hand, currently showing them to Dean.

“Um…” Dean started intelligently, sitting up. His eyes traveled over Cas’s body until they finally landed on his eyes. He gulped.

“Never mind, I’ll take the green one,” Cas said after a beat. He tossed the rest of the ties on the bed and marched to the mirror. Dean didn’t move for a moment, calming himself down. When he decided he more or less succeeded, Dean stretched and looked at the pile of clothes next to him.

“Did you try every single shirt I own?” He asked, glancing at Cas.

“They were a little tight in the chest.”

“Sure they were,” Dean muttered to himself. “Did you choose a jacket?”

“I think I’ll take the gray one if you don’t mind.”

“Does it fit?”

Castiel turned around, raising one eyebrow. “Barely. But it will do, for now.” He marched to the bed again, undoubtedly looking for the jacket. When he finally found it and put it on, he turned to Dean. “So? How do I look?”

Many thoughts ran through Dean's head, almost none of them appropriate to say out loud. Ultimately, he decided to choose the safest one. 

“Well, damn, Cas,” Dean remarked, a crooked grin forming on his lips. “You clean up nice.”

Cas shot him a half-smile. “Isn’t it too much?”

Dean shook his head. “It's perfect.”

Cas seemed to relax at the reassurance. He looked in the mirror again and then began to tame his dark hair but to no avail. Dean glanced at his watch. It was almost 7:00 AM.

“Okay, I need my coffee. I’ll be downstairs. Can you put those things” he waved in the direction of the pile on his bed ”back in the closet?”

“Of course. At what time do we need to leave?”

"8:30. Plenty of time,” Dean said, then yawned and stood up, heading to the bathroom.

+

“And I would have to change schools, too?”

“If we decide to move, yes.”

The boy looked at the opposite wall, lost in thought, the sandwich on his plate forgotten.

“But you wouldn’t sail without me like you have to now?” He asked Cas after a moment.

Castiel glanced at Dean, then back at his son. “No, if we decide to live in Porto, I will sail with you. And with Dean, if he wants us to.”

Dean nodded. “I do.”

“Three of us, then,” Castiel stated. Dean felt a familiar warmth spreading in his ribcage.

“Will I be able to visit grandpa and grandma?”

Cas frowned. “Of course, Jack. You can visit whoever you want,” he said.

Jack nodded. “Alright. In that case, I want to move here,” he said decisively, taking a bite of his food.

Cas chuckled, looking at Dean, who grinned.

“Let me go to the meeting first. I just wanted to make sure you’re okay with the idea. I need to discuss everything with Sam and Dean first.”

Jack looked at Dean, suddenly serious. “Will you be my Dad’s boss?”

Dean’s eyes went wide. “I mean… It depends on… on the arrangement.” He glanced at Cas, who rested his chin on his hand, amused.

“Do tell us about the arrangement, Dean.”

Dean narrowed his eyes at him, not knowing what was going on again.

“Can we live here, with Dean?” The boy interjected.

“No,” Cas said, while Dean said “yes” at the same time. They looked at each other, frowning. 

“What do you mean by ‘yes’?” Cas asked while Dean said, “Why not?”

Jack giggled. “I think you should find common ground.” Dean looked at him and raised his eyebrows. The boy shrugged. “I learned this in school.”

“Alright. I think we should take it one step at a time. Let’s get back to this after the meeting,” Cas finally said, looking at Dean.

“Fair enough. We should roll. Did you eat enough, Jack?”

“Yes, I’m full.”

“Okay, good,” Dean said before standing up, careful not to get his tie soaked in hummus. Cas and Jack stood up as well. Together they put the food back in the fridge and the dirty dishes in the sink. When all was set, they left the apartment and headed to the car.

+

The trip to the office took them 15 minutes, the next 5 they spent looking for Eileen in the parking lot.

“Jack, be good, listen to Eileen. If anything happens, call me,” Cas said, hugging the kid, then glanced at Eileen and signed something that Dean didn’t manage to understand. She smiled and nodded, then took Jack to the car with her.

Dean led Cas to the entrance, greeting Donna along the way. 

He noticed Cas getting more and more nervous with each passing moment.

“Hey,” Dean said, placing a hand on Cas’s shoulder as they stood in the elevator. “You’ve got this, Angel.”

Cas nodded once, then closed his eyes and took a deep breath, his face going completely blank. Dean had no idea how Cas did it, but when the elevator door opened again, his friend looked composed and confident.

“Okay then,” Dean muttered baffled, following Cas across the gray carpet. 

A few heads turned behind them before they reached the conference room. Sam, Crowley, and Meg were already sitting inside.

“Good morning,” Castiel said in his deep voice.

“I forgot how good you look in formal clothes, Clarence,” Meg said sweetly.

“Um. Thank you,” Cas said politely.

“Hello, Castiel. Please, sit down. We need to wait for Benny,” Sam said, shaking Cas's hand.

“Feathers,” Crowley said smirking, when Cas took his place next to Sam.

“Crowley,” Cas responded evenly. 

“Don’t mind me, I’ll just sit there,” Dean said, squeezing into the seat next to Cas.

“How was your sailing experience, Clarence? Did Dean provide you with everything you needed?”

“Meg, as far as I'm concerned, you don't even have to be here, so shut your pie hole,” Dean gritted out through his teeth.

“Dean,” Sam hissed.

“She started it.” 

“Are you five, Squirrel?” Crowley asked, amused.

“Clearly,” Meg supplied. Dean glared at her. When Benny finally joined them a moment later, the atmosphere hung heavy with tension.

“Hi, I’m Benny Lafitte,” he said, approaching Cas with an outstretched hand. 

“Nice to meet you, I’m Castiel Novak,” Cas said, shaking his palm.

“So you’re the golden boy Crowley won’t shut up about, huh?” Benny asked, then sat down at the table. Castiel frowned, glancing at Crowley.

“That’s a compliment, Feathers,” Crowley assured him.

“Okay, let’s start,” Sam said quickly, not risking another argument. “As you already know, we would like to hire you, Castiel. Singer & Winchesters is a private limited company. Dean and Benny are mainly responsible for manufacturing our vessels, while I take care of sales and marketing. Until recently, this model was sufficient, but the company is expanding fast.” Sam glanced at Crowley, then at the papers in front of him. “Currently, we are looking for a person who would take care of the department responsible for finances, as well as support me in marketing and sales. As Crowley rightly pointed out, you would be the perfect person for the job. Your unique set of skills will not only support us but also enable us to develop your professional goals.”

“Sammy, I'm sure even you have no fucking idea what you're talking about. You just use random words at this point,” Dean said, then winked at Cas, who tried to hold back his smile.

Sam huffed. “Shut up, Dean,” he said, then looked at Cas again, ready to continue.

“Remind me how exactly you managed to get your degree?” Crowley asked Dean, smirking.

“Oh, I bet you’d like to know, huh?” Dean shot back.

Sam looked up at the ceiling, probably praying for some patience, then looked back down, shooting an annoyed glance at Dean before he continued. “Please, ignore them, Castiel. As you can clearly see, we are in desperate need of someone competent here.”

“You hired me, Moose. I’m super competent.” Crowley spoke, offended.

“Sure you are,” Dean sent Crowley a sly smirk.

“As I was saying…” Sam started, ignoring the banter, “we believe your expertise in economics, multilingual proficiency, and your reputation in the sailing community make you an ideal fit for this role. We understand that this is a significant decision, and we want to assure you that we value not only your professional skills but also your well-being. If you have any concerns or questions, feel free to voice them,” Sam ended smiling at Cas, then sat back down.

Cas looked at the people sitting at the table one by one. He seemed calm, his blue eyes without any trace of doubt. When his eyes locked with Dean's, he smiled a little. Dean smiled back. Cas glanced back at his brother.

“Thank you, Sam. I’m flattered you thought of me. You’re probably aware that to work here, I would have to move from Sweden first. For that reason alone, I would need to know all the financial and legal details before we move forward.”

+

Half an hour later, Cas was sitting on a sofa in Dean's office, studying the contract Sam had provided him, while Dean spun around in the chair behind his desk.

“This is a generous offer,” Cas finally said, glancing at Dean over the papers. “I believe Benny and Charlie have similar contracts.” He looked through the papers again, deep in thought.

Dean stopped spinning and glanced at his friend. “So, what do you think?” He asked. Cas looked him in the eyes and Dean could notice a mixture of nerves and hope swirling in the ocean.

“The choice would be easier if it was only about financial management, but Crowley and Sam want me to be the face of your brand. I’m not great with people, Dean.”

“That’s bullshit, man. Besides, I won’t just abandon you. In fact, if you're going to attend the same meetings as me, I'm willing to sit through all of them. I can even tell stupid jokes every time you feel nervous.”

Castiel tilted his head to the side, a mischievous glint in his eyes. “Can we add it to the contract?” He asked.

“If it will make you stay here, sure we can. Give me a pen,” Dean said. Cas snorted and shook his head. “Hey, look on the bright side here. At least Crowley doesn't want you selling detergent, Mr. Novak,” Dean added, making Cas laugh again. “Listen, in all seriousness, you shouldn’t rush into anything. It's a big change, you have to be sure before you make any decision,” Dean said again.

“Thank you. It means a lot,” Cas said quietly. “I should probably talk with my brothers, too.” He sighed, then looked out the window. “Accepting this offer… it would change everything. I wouldn’t even know where to begin.”

“Cas, buddy, I’ll help you if I can. I’m serious,” Dean said, looking at his friend. Cas was worried, and Dean didn’t like it in the slightest. “Hey, here’s an idea. Let’s skip the hangar tour, call Eileen and go get Jack, then start our movie marathon back at home. You need to relax and we have plenty of movies to catch up on,” Dean said, smiling gently.

Suddenly, they heard a knock on Dean’s door. When it opened, they saw a cheerful face and fire-red hair.

“Aaaahh! It’s really you!” Charlie screamed in excitement and threw herself on Cas’s neck. Cas's eyes went wide, but he returned the embrace.

“Charles, could you stop killing Cas, please?” Dean asked with his hands folded.

“I can’t believe you didn’t inform me he’s in the office, Winchester! How could you do this to me? You know I've wanted to meet the guy since June!” She whined, finally letting go of Cas, who stood up from the sofa.

“You’re… Charlie,” he said, smiling at her shyly.

“That’s me! God, you’re so pretty, dude!” She exclaimed, then took Cas’s hand into hers. “By the way, Dorothy and I are taking you and your kid to her parent’s vineyard on the weekend.” She glanced at Dean. “You can come too.”

“Hey-” Dean started, but Charlie ignored him.

“You need a change of scenery, my beautiful friend. You can’t just sit and watch Dean’s face all the time, even if he’s easy on the eyes,” she winked at Cas, then glanced at Dean again. “We’re gonna take the Mustang. Saturday, 10 AM at my place. I actually need to work now, so have a lovely day, and we'll see each other soon. Bye, bitches!” She waved, then turned around and marched out of the door. 

“She’s energetic,” Cas stated after a moment.

“That’s one way to call it,” Dean said, looking at the door in disbelief.

+

“Okay, Jack. This is going to be the most important movie you’ll ever see. Your Dad actually fell asleep the last time we watched it, and I still haven't fully recovered from it.” Cas rolled his eyes at Dean, but Dean didn’t pay any attention to him. His velvet sofa was full of additional pillows and blankets for comfort and they were surrounded by vegan snacks. Dean had even made his own guacamole and vegan cheese for nachos. All three of them were in their pajamas, Jack sitting in the middle.

“Do you have any questions before we start?” Dean asked the boy.

“Just one. What if I don’t like it? Will you throw me out on the street?”

“First of all, there is no way you won’t like ‘The Lord of the Ring - extended edition’, Jack Kline. Second of all, I’m not a monster, I’d never do that to you. Okay, ready?”

“I’m ready,” Jack declared, focusing on the TV in front of them.

Once the familiar story unfolded on the screen, the room filled with the magic of Middle Earth. Probably for the first time in his life, however, Dean couldn’t fully focus on the plot. Stolen glances at Cas above Jack’s head showed that his friend had trouble focusing on the screen as well. 

It wasn't an easy decision for Castiel, Dean was sure of it. Hell, he himself had made a similar one a few years back, before he had moved to Porto. The problem was, that Cas was alone with Jack, while Dean had had his brother, Eileen, and Charlie with him. He took a sip of his tea.

If he thought about it, Cas had Dean now, too, hadn't he?

Dean glanced at Jack's hair. The boy had said he wouldn't mind them living here, with Dean. To be honest, Dean would love to have both of them in his house permanently, but he doubted Cas would agree to such an arrangement if he truly decided to work in Porto. He had repeated over and over again that Jack was the most important to him, so it was only natural he wanted to provide his son with the best possible conditions. Living in the guest room of a guy you had met three months ago did not meet these criteria.

When the scene of Gandalf fighting Balrog on the bridge was shown on the screen, Jack gasped. 

“No, I like Gandalf,” he said quietly. Dean smiled to himself, then glanced at Cas who was looking fondly at his son. 

“I like him too. This isn't fair,” Cas stated, then glanced at Dean, narrowing his eyes.

“Stop talking and give the story a chance, guys. Tolkien knew what he was doing, and so did Peter Jackson,” Dean said quickly, lifting his eyebrows at Cas. 

They watched the rest of the movie in complete silence, except for the crunch of nachos and popcorn. When the credits started to roll, Jack turned his head to Dean with wide eyes.

“I need to see what happens next.”

Dean chuckled, then glanced at Castiel.

“I told you he's got a taste, dude.” He turned to Jack again. “We’ll continue after we eat, alright? I believe I promised you a pizza.”

“Pizaaaaa!” Jack shouted, then stood up. “I want to help, I just need to go to the bathroom. Will you wait for me?”

“Sure, kid,” Dean grinned. When Jack vanished upstairs, Dean looked at Cas, meeting his gaze.

“I can't help but wonder, why don't you have your own children, Dean? You would be an amazing father,” he said, smiling softly.

“Thanks,” Dean said, then looked at the TV in front of him. “I uh… I told you when we met that I never thought I'd be a good dad,” he looked back at Cas. “And I guess I’ve never met the right person to start a family with,” he stopped, then added, ”I mean, you're an example of a great single father, don't get me wrong. It's just that it's easier and better for a child to have two parents.”

Cas sighed. “Believe me, I do know that. It's never been easy to do all of this alone.”

“So why did you?” Dean asked before he could chicken out.

Cas looked at him with his soul-searching gaze. “It’s quite simple Dean. I've never met the right person either,” he rumbled, watching Dean closely.

Everything went still. 

There it was again, the look that made Dean wonder and question his resolve. He glanced at Cas's lips, then back at his eyes, too scared to move. He could feel his heart racing in his chest. Cas looked like he was waiting for a reaction, his eyes wide and honest.

The air around them was charged with anticipation.

Feelings were scary, Dean decided. 

If only he was brave enough to take a leap of faith on this. 

But Dean was never a believer. 

“I'm ready. Can we make it with mushrooms and onions?” Jack’s voice suddenly broke the silence.

Dean smiled at Jack, who was looking at him expectantly at the bottom of the stairs. 

“Yeah, bud. Let's make it with mushrooms and onions,” Dean said, then stood up and went to the fridge, too scared to look back at Cas’s face. 

+

Once they ate the pizza, they resumed their marathon. The second movie turned out even better than the first and Jack tried to get them to watch another one, but it was getting late, so Cas decided it was time for Jack to take a shower and go to bed. The boy wasn’t overly happy with this turn of events, but he managed to convince Cas to read him a chapter from 'The Hobbit' for a bedtime story. Meanwhile, Dean focused on cleaning the room, which over time had turned into a pillow fort. When he finished and glanced at his watch, it was past 11 PM. He suspected that Cas had already gone to sleep, so he decided to head towards the bed too. 

As he lay down, Dean quickly discovered that sleep didn't really want to come.

The room was quiet, except for the distant sounds of the traffic on a nearby street. Dean tossed from side to side, trying to find the perfect position, but nothing he did helped him relax. He just couldn’t seem to turn off his brain. Finally, he lay defeated on his back, staring at the ceiling.

Dean felt like he was slowly losing his mind. 

There were moments where he could have sworn he saw in Cas's eyes the same question and longing he himself felt, indicating Cas was going through the same internal struggle as Dean. But they were just hints, bits and pieces - nothing certain. There was no way to tell what was going on in the other man's head.

Well, there was a way, wasn't there? He just had to ask. Dean winced in the dark. What if Cas didn't feel the same way? What if their connection was one-sided and only existed in Dean's imagination? Either way, this wasn't a good time for such things, he thought. If he asked the guy now, it would only add to Cas's pile of problems. The prospect of moving here was probably overwhelming already, there was no space for Dean’s stupid crush now.

He lay there for a few more hours, tormented by his own thoughts, before he finally fell asleep.

+

When Dean opened his eyes again, the sun was already high in the sky. He looked at his phone and discovered that it was, indeed, late. He also noticed a text from Cas informing him that he and Jack had gone for a walk.

God, Dean was a shitty host, leaving his guests alone like that for fuck's know how long.

He sat up and ran a hand over his face, then swung his legs over the edge of the bed. As he stood up, Dean felt a pain in his knee, reminding him that he should probably make that appointment with his doctor.

An hour later, as he sipped his second mug of coffee, Cas and Jack finally returned.

“Hey!” He greeted them. “Where did you guys go?”

“We climbed a nearby hill. And dad called my uncles,” Jack responded. He didn’t seem particularly happy. Dean frowned, then glanced at Cas, who didn't look good either.

“Is everything alright?” Dean asked them.

Cas’s tired eyes met his. “Yes. I didn’t sleep very well, and my brothers can be… difficult sometimes.”

“I know what you mean, dude. Coffee?”

“Yes, please,” Cas replied, sitting down at the table with a grunt, while Jack marched over to the sofa and turned on the TV. Cas observed him for a while, then turned back to Dean. His worried gaze lingered on him as if he wasn't quite sure how to express what was going through his mind. “Dean, can I ask you to forget that you own a company that wants to hire me for a moment? I need to talk with… with a friend,” he finally said.

“Sure thing, Cas. Talk to me,” Dean responded, placing the mug with a fresh coffee in front of Castiel. Then, he sat down too and turned his full attention to his friend.

“I spoke with my brothers. Gabriel thinks I should try to negotiate a higher salary with the company, and he doesn't seem to be sold on the whole idea of us moving here. Jimmy thinks I’m insane.”

Dean studied Cas’s face for a moment. “What do you think?”

Castiel looked torn. “I’m mostly just… afraid. This wasn't the scenario I imagined when we came here. It's a big step.”

“Yeah, I get it. You're on vacation. You should be sipping wine, not deciding about moving to another country,” Dean said, nodding once. He folded his arms. “Alright, let's take a step back and sum up the facts. Jack is growing up, and he’ll want to move to college in a few years anyway,” Dean started counting off on his fingers. “People from the company that currently hires you as their skipper don't deserve you. You could probably translate stuff from here if you wanted to. I don’t know your family or friends, but if I remember correctly, your siblings don't live in the same city as you, and at least some of your friends are shit. I guess the real question is: do you want to stay in Sweden?”

Cas ran his hand over his face, rubbing his eyes. “I don’t really mind moving. I've done this several times already. Jack hasn't, but I guess Porto is much bigger than Visby; they certainly have more opportunities here,” he stopped, then added, smiling wryly, “and as you correctly noticed, my current job isn't perfect.”

“Hey, why do your brothers even care if you work here or there? I mean, it’s not like they can’t visit you here, right?” Dean asked.

Cas observed him closely. “They seem to be mainly concerned about the circumstances under which I got this offer.”

Dean frowned. “What do you mean?”

“They know who Crowley is, and they don’t believe that his intentions are pure,” Cas said, then looked away before continuing. ”They also noticed that I have only known you for a short time, so it’s foolish to, uh… ‘blindly’ put my trust in you,” Cas said, adding the air quote. 

The silence filled the room.

Cas met Dean's eyes again. “I don’t think I shouldn’t trust you, Dean,” he said calmly. “Everything is just happening really fast and it's a big change. I need to remain cautious, at least for Jack's sake.”

Dean couldn’t really argue with that. He studied Cas's face for a moment. He could at least try to assure his friend of their intentions, he thought.

“Cas, the offer is legit. I would never put you in harm's way like this. I wouldn't do that to Jack, either.” Dean sighed, then added, “Listen, we can show the papers to the lawyer before you sign them. Hell, I can show you the books on Monday.”

Cas frowned. “You shouldn't do that, Dean.”

Dean held his gaze. “As the owner or as your friend? Because I don't give a damn what the owner of the company thinks right now. Cas, I'm serious. I don't want you to feel trapped or… or scared. If I thought this whole idea was stupid, I wouldn't even tell you about it in the first place. I'll make a call, the lawyer will show up on Monday to check everything for you.”

Cas's eyes widened. Dean waited patiently until his friend found in his gaze what he was looking for.

“You’re one of a kind, Dean Winchester,” Castiel finally said, a smile slowly blooming on his face. He tilted his head to the side. “I have one more request. Can you promise me you won't randomly offer to show our company’s books to other people?”

Dean's mouth parted. “Does it mean you'll take the offer?” He asked quietly.

Cas nodded. “I’ll gladly consult the documents with a lawyer first, but if all is in order, I'll join you. I hope I won't regret it,” he said, grinning.

“Awesome!” Dean exclaimed and grinned back.

“What's going on?” Asked Jack from the sofa.

“I made a decision, Jack,” Cas said, looking at his son. “We’re moving to Porto.”

“Really?” The boy asked with wide eyes. 

“Yes,” Cas responded, then turned to Dean. ”I guess we won't stay here for the whole three weeks, after all,” he said, a playful smile forming on his lips.

Dean smiled back, leaning on his elbow. “I'll let it slide this time.”

Meanwhile, Jack stood up and joined them at the table.

“We need to get back to Visby and pack, I guess,” Cas said to the boy.

“When are we going back?” Jack asked.

“As soon as I sign the contract. I need to call Sam,” Castiel responded, pulling out his phone.

Dean turned to the boy. “Don’t worry, kiddo. We're gonna see all the cool stuff when you get back.” 

“Okay,” Jack smiled a little and nodded.

“I need about a week or two to take care of everything back home,” Cas said, then glanced at Dean. “You have to help me look for an apartment here.”

“Yeah, about that,” Dean started. “You guys can stay here as long as you want. I mean, you’ve got enough on your plate already.”

A strange look appeared on Cas's face. His eyes narrowed. “Dean, I can't work for you and live in your apartment at the same time.”

Even if Cas reacted just like Dean had predicted, Cas’s words awoke something ugly inside of him. “And why exactly is that?” He asked stubbornly.

“Because it's risky,” Cas responded with a glint of irritation in his blue eyes. “What if something happens and you’ll fire me? I can't risk Jack's well-being like that, he has to feel safe in his home.”

It stung more than Dean would like to admit, but he decided to let the subject go for now. There was no way in hell he would make them move out, even in this completely impossible situation that Cas had described, but Dean understood where those fears were coming from.

“Okay, so at least stay here until you find your footing in Porto. You seriously wanna look for an apartment now, with everything already going on?”

Cas observed him for a moment. “We’ll come back to this,” he finally said, then focused on his phone again, tapping Sam's name on the screen.

+

Dean was in hell. Or in heaven, depending on how he looked at it. The place was too bright, too loud, and smelled too strong. Additionally, the seat was uncomfortable and no matter what Dean did, he couldn't sit still.

Why he agreed to this, he had no idea.

“Okay, and what about the blue one?” Cas asked, coming out of the fitting room.

Oh, right, that’s why. 

Before him stood Cas, now dressed in a navy blue, well-fitting suit. The material of the jacket framed his chest and arms perfectly, wonderfully emphasizing everything it should. Dean didn’t even want to focus on the suit pants, too scared to drool all over the floor. 

Two hours ago his friend had declared he needed a suit for Monday and since he had to buy a new one anyway, he’d 'wanted to do it as soon as possible, if Dean didn’t mind'. Dean had been too stupid to notice the obvious trap he had willingly walked into. He had nobody else to blame but himself, he thought, observing how the color of the suit made the striking blue of Cas’s eyes stand out. 

“It’s… good,” he managed to say.

Cas raised one eyebrow. “Yesterday morning you were more talkative. Is it better than the black one I tried earlier?”

Dean felt his cheeks reddening. He scratched the back of his head and fidgeted in his seat. He glanced at Cas, who sent him a mischievous grin.

“So?” Cas said after a beat, turning around again.

“Yeah. If I had to choose, this one’s better. The color is good. Classic, y’know?” Dean finally replied.

Cas nodded. “Alright. Blue it is, then. I just need to buy a tie and a shirt, and then we can try retrieving Jack from the bookstore.”

+

After returning home, the three of them decided to watch the last part of ‘Lord of the Rings’. Dean had to take out the tissues and put them on the coffee table because everyone cried at the end. As the credits rolled, Jack declared that he wanted to be Aragorn from now on and live in the castle as the ruler of Middle Earth. Dean decided to challenge him to a pillow fight to see if the boy would be a good king. His victory seemed assured until Cas joined his son.

“That’s playing dirty, man,” Dean laughed, trying to avoid Cas’s pillow, which he swung terribly precise and fast. 

“I’m not sure what you mean,” Cas said, smirking. “You are the one who attacked a much smaller opponent.“ He narrowed his eyes and charged at Dean again. Dean did not yelp, trying to dodge the scary part of the bedding ensemble while Jack cheered his dad from the sofa.

Cas’s set of muscles turned out to be more than just for show as he finally pinned Dean to the ground a few moments later. 

“I yield!” Dean exclaimed, trying to push the pillow Cas was sitting on off of himself.

“As you should,” Cas said, laughing. “Next time challenge someone your own size, Dean.”

“God, how are you so fit, man?” Dean whined, squirming under Cas’s weight. 

“I work out,” Cas rumbled back.

“Yeah, well, color me surprised. Okay, get your ass off me, you’re heavy.”

When Cas finally stood up, he helped Dean to his feet and they proceeded to clean up the battlefield. Once they finished, Cas turned his attention to Jack. “It’s time for bed. Dean’s friend invited us to a trip tomorrow.”

“Will there be a castle?” Jack asked, glancing at Dean.

“Sorry, bud. Charlie and Dorothy are taking us to a vineyard. We’ll see a castle when you guys are back from Sweden,” Dean said, smiling a little.

Jack nodded, then looked at Castiel again. 

“Jack, bed,” Cas repeated.

“I don’t want to sleep yet,” Jack argued stubbornly.

“Come on, it’s late,” Cas insisted.

“Ugh. Can Dean read me a story today, at least?”

Dean exchanged a surprised glance with Cas, but he quickly hid any shock behind a smile.

“Sure thing, bud. Do you want me to read you the next chapter of ‘The Hobbit’?”

“Yep!”

“Okay. Call me when you’re ready, then.”

Once Jack and Cas vanished upstairs, Dean went to the sink with all of the dirty dishes and poured himself a new glass of water. He often forgot to stay hydrated throughout the day; Sammy kept nagging him about how it was important for his health.

15 minutes later Cas called him to the guest room. Jack was already under the covers, waiting patiently for the bedtime story. Dean smiled at him, then sat down on the mattress, grabbed a book from the bedside table, and started reading.

Jack's eyelids were getting heavier and heavier, and not even 10 minutes later, his eyes finally closed.

“He’s growing so fast,” Cas whispered. The boy was sprawled on half of the bed like a starfish.

Dean chuckled quietly, taking in the limited space on the mattress. "How do you even fit in here, dude?" he remarked, glancing at the rest of the bed.

Cas smirked. "Barely," he replied, lying on the bed with his head propped on his hand. After a moment, his expression shifted, becoming more serious. "Thank you, Dean. You provided us with uh… distractions so we wouldn’t worry so much. We both needed it.”

“No problem, man. It’s stressful, I get it,” Dean stopped, then glanced back at the sleeping boy. ”Y’know, I think he’s gonna be happy in Porto.”

“I sure hope so. Today you made me realize it will be difficult for me when the time comes for him to move out. I never let thoughts like that cross my mind, it's too scary,” Cas smiled a little. Dean studied his friend’s face for a moment, then glanced at Jack again.

“I can only imagine. You'll be alright, though. I'm gonna get you super drunk. We'll party for a week, man,” he said, grinning.

Cas stifled a laugh. “Stop it, you’re going to wake him up.”

Dean nodded, then put the book back on the bedside table. “Alright. I’m going to bed,” he said, standing up.

“When do we have to leave to get to Charlie’s house on time?”

“9:40 in the morning. Have a good night, Cas.”

“You too.”

+

“You’re swirling it badly, Mr. Winchester. Focus on your wrist. Swirl with flair.”

“With flair,” Dean repeated, trying not to laugh.

“Exactly.” The wine expert lady looked at him with stern eyes. She was scary, Dean decided, swirling his glass again.

Everyone, apart from Jack, who had gotten grape juice, had been given a glass of different wine and had to identify it using the knowledge they’d gained during the guided tour. Charlie was dying to take a sip of her drink already, but the creepy lady wouldn't let her until everyone had learned how to swirl the glass perfectly. The motion should have enhanced the scent of the drink, but all Dean could smell was a simple, red wine. When he glanced at Cas, the bastard looked like he had been swirling with flair all his life. He smirked at Dean when the scary lady was turned away from him.

“Now, you will take a sip of the wine and swish it around your mouth. Do not swallow yet. You should hit every taste bud first, to get the impression of the flavor. Focus on your tongue, on the sensation the wine leaves behind.”

Dean almost snorted the wine through his nose. It was like a pornographic broadcast narrated by an unpleasant woman. He started coughing, drawing the attention of Charlie and Dorothy. The wine expert lady ignored him, obviously deciding that if he choked to death, not much would happen.

Castiel had been observing him for a moment now, clearly having the time of his life. He had a knowing glint in his eyes that pissed Dean off.

“Now swallow and breathe in through your mouth, then breathe out through your nose. You should feel some additional smells now.”

Once the lady finally allowed them to drink their wine, she led them to a room with a large table where they could sit and order lunch. Outside the window, they could see the breathtaking Douro River, running through a valley adorned with terraces of grapevines.

When the waiter came with the wine for starters, Cas decided to annoy Dean even more by following the instructions he had learned during the vineyard exploration.

“We’re actually here to learn how to taste wine, Dean. Yesterday you told me I'm on vacation and should ‘sip wine,’ didn't you?” Cas asked, amused at Dean’s irritation. He also used air quotes, because, of course, he did.

“Shut up,” Dean grumbled, then swished the wine around his mouth. When he swallowed, he turned his head to Cas again and made a face.

“It still tastes just like wine. There is no way to feel a cherry or a strawberry flavor in this thing. You're all making this up,” he accused Cas and Dorothy, who seemed to be the most skilled at wine sniffing.

“Did you focus on your tongue enough?” Cas asked, grinning.

Dean rolled his eyes, taking another sip. “You're stupid,” he said, smirking.

“I'd like to propose a toast!” Charlie said after a moment, standing up. ”To Castiel and Jack, and their new adventure in Porto. Here's to the moments that turn into memories, and friends who become family!”

“Cheers!” Dean said, raising his glass to clink it with the others. He glanced at Charlie suspiciously, but she seemed to be avoiding his gaze.

“Congratulations on your choice, Castiel. They say it’s a good company,” Dorothy said.

Cas chuckled. “Thank you. You must’ve heard the same rumors as me.”

“Charlie seems happy with her job, the money’s good. What more could you ask for?”

Cas sighed. “Yes, that seems to be true. I'm just worried we need to change so much in such a short period of time.”

“I bet. You guys need to move here, after all. Do you have a plan already?”

“More or less. I’ve rebooked our tickets to Sweden for Monday. Our vacation will be cut short, but I'd rather take care of everything sooner than later. School is about to start, so if we hurry, Jack can begin the semester with other kids.”

As Castiel and Dorothy delved into a discussion about Cas's plans, Dean decided to engage with Jack sitting in a chair beside him. He seemed to be deep in thought.

“Hey, bud?” Dean said, pulling the kid’s sleeve. “You know, Charlie is a big 'Lord of the Rings' expert. She has Galadriel's entire outfit hidden somewhere in her closet.” 

The boy's eyes went wide. “Whoa! Does that mean I can buy an Aragorn costume?”

Charlie giggled. “Jack, there is no need to buy it. We’re gonna make it when you move here. I’ve got a sewing machine!”

“Really? You can do that?” Jack’s eyes sparkled.

“Yeah! I’d love to. Aragorn is cool, man. Good choice.”

“Dean thinks so too,” Jack said.

Charlie sent Dean a shit-eating grin, then looked back at Jack. “I know! Isn't that crazy?”

Dean made a face.

“Hey Jack, when we finish with the costume, I can take you to the convent with me! People will love the little Aragorn outfit,” Charlie said, smiling.

The boy frowned. “I’m not little…”

“No, of course you’re not,” she stated, nodding.

“...but I’d like to go. Can I get a sword, too?”

“Well, duh! Aragorn has to have his sword,” Dean interjected. Suddenly an idea formed in his mind, but he decided to leave it for later.

Charlie glanced at Dean. “Maybe we can persuade Dean to go with us. He could be Boromir.” 

“Hey, I don't wanna be the dead guy!”

“Legolas?” Charlie helpfully supplied.

“That's ridiculous. How am I gonna look in tight green pants?” Dean asked, frowning.

“You're just picky, Winchester. Anyway, we're going to find someone you're okay with and all of us can go together,” she ended, smiling.

“Go where?” Cas interjected.

“To a convention!” Jack replied happily. Cas tilted his head to the side and squinted at Jack, then moved his gaze to Dean. He was clearly looking for some answers.

“Don't look at me, it was her idea,” Dean said, pointing at his friend.

Charlie raised her eyebrow. “You agreed it's a good one.”

“Can someone explain to me what a convention is?” Cas asked impatiently.

Dean smirked at him. “You dress like your favorite character from any franchise, gather in one place with other people, and scream when you see an actor or a celebrity.” 

Cas frowned. “Why?”

“For fun. Live a little,” Dean said and winked at his friend, sipping his wine. 

Castiel smirked. “Fair enough,” he said, watching Dean with amusement. 

“Riiiiiight…” Charlie said smiling awkwardly, her eyes flickering back and forth between Cas and Dean. Dean wanted to ask what exactly she meant by that, but before he could, the waiter arrived with the food they had ordered.

After the meal, a different wine expert (fortunately) guided them on a stroll through the hills full of terraces of grapevines. The sun was shining mercilessly and everyone pulled out their hats. Of course, Cas had his cowboy hat with him and he put it on, making Dean internally scream. When Charlie saw what exactly Cas was wearing, she sent Dean a knowing look. He rolled his eyes at her.

“During harvest, each vineyard block is carefully assessed and only the best grapes are selected. It is extremely important to preserve the integrity of the fruit…” 

The guide passed from one bush to another, dwelling on the greenness of the leaves, but Dean couldn’t care less. A quick glance at Charlie confirmed she was as uninterested in the grape plant life cycle lecture as he was. Cas, on the other hand, listened to every word as if he were going to grow his own grapes soon. 

After a moment, Charlie sidled up to Dean, a mischievous glint in her eyes.

“Did you buy him this hat so you could simp over him even more?” She whispered. 

Dean’s eyes widened. “Be quiet, you maniac!” He whispered back glancing at Cas to make sure he hadn’t heard Charlie. The dude was fortunately focused on the… soil? Dean frowned, then turned his attention back to Charlie. “No, his niece gave it to him. Charles, you can’t tell him anything strange, you hear me?” Dean quietly pleaded.

She smiled at him. “Don’t worry, I'm just teasing you. But you do realize he’s into you, right?” She whispered.

Dean searched her gaze. “How do you know?”

She scoffed quietly. “Dude, are you serious? The tension between you two is so thick you can practically cut it with a butter knife. And he looks at you like you hung the moon.”

Dean gulped, then glanced at Cas again. Maybe he wasn’t imagining things, after all?

“You didn't tell him anything, did you?” Charlie asked, observing him closely.

Dean shook his head. “It’s… complicated. Now even more than before. But I'm thinking about it, I swear.“

“I hope you do. He's a catch, you know. If you don't tell him he's hot soon, someone else might.”

Dean winced. “Yeah, yeah,” he said weakly, glancing at Cas again.

“Alright, everyone,” the tour guide said. “Let's take a break from the stroll and gather near the vines. I've got some fantastic wines ready for you to taste.” 

“Finally…” Charlie sighed.

When the winery tour was over, Dorothy's parents invited the entire group to dinner. Mrs. Baum was a sweet, lovely woman, and she quickly stole Charlie's heart. Mr. Baum turned out to be an old languages enthusiast, so he and Cas engaged in a conversation about the topic pretty early in the evening. At one point, Cas changed the language to Portuguese, which Dean thought was a show-off. That obviously didn't stop him from admiring the hot nerd even more. 

After dinner, Dean, Cas, and Jack were given a room in the winery part of the hotel. Charlie was going to sleep in Dorothy's old room in her family home, a building away. Charlie, who was a little tipsy by now, pointed a finger at Cas before they parted ways. "I'll see you for a nightcap in an hour, cowboy. We need to bond." Then, she glanced at Dean. "I'm stealing him. You and the king of Gondor need to organize your time by yourselves."

Dean huffed. "No worries. Me and Jack will be just fine. Isn't that right, bud?" Jack nodded, grinning at Dean.

Their room had three single beds. Jack took the one closest to the window, where they could now see a beautiful sunset. The golden light enveloped the entire valley, reflecting on the water below.

"Okay, let's see if they have Netflix here," Dean said, reaching for the remote control from the cabinet.

“Dean, are you really okay with staying here with Jack?” Cas asked, looking a little worried.

Dean frowned. “Sure, man. Why wouldn’t I be?”

“I just don’t want to make you do things you’re not comfortable with.”

“C’mon, what are you even talking about?” Dean asked, shaking his head. He liked Jack, there was no harm in watching movies with the kid. “Besides, drinking with Charlie will definitely help you relax,” Dean added, smirking.

Cas chuckled. “I’m actually a little afraid.”

Dean’s grin widened. “Yeah, as you should be. But once you get through it, nothing will break you.”

Cas snorted, then nodded and started to rummage through his duffel bag.

When his friend left the room, Dean turned on 'Star Wars'. They managed to watch two movies before Jack got sleepy, so Dean sent him to the shower. When the boy was ready for bed and Cas still hadn't returned, Dean decided to call it a night, opting not to wait for him.

“Hey, Dean?” Jack asked about 10 minutes after they had finally turned off the lights. Dean was almost asleep by then.

“Yeah, bud?” He said, blinking his eyes open.

“I would like to live at your house when we move here.”

Dean felt a wave of emotions overcoming him. He would like it, too, but he couldn’t contradict Cas’s decision on the subject.

“Yeah, me too,” he finally rasped, then cleared his throat before he continued. ”But you know what? You are always welcome at my home. And you can count on me, Jack. Whatever happens, just give me a call, and I’ll try to help. Okay?”

“Okay, Dean.”

“Good. Now go to sleep, bud.”

+

By the time everyone packed into the Mustang the next day, it was already afternoon. Cas, Dorothy, and Charlie's evening must have been a success, judging by the hangovers of all three of them and the lingering smell of booze in the air. Dean was a little afraid that someone would throw up on his precious seats, so, instead of engaging them in conversation, he decided to play some music.

When they reached Porto, Dean dropped off Charlie and Dorothy first, then rode Cas and Jack back to his house. 

"Here. Aspirin. Take three," Dean said, pushing a white box under his friend's nose. Cas was sitting on the couch, with his head in his hands. He looked like a pile of regret, undoubtedly reflecting on choices he had made the night before. He accepted the box with gratitude.

“I don’t think I want to get drunk ever again,” Cas stated after a moment.

Dean grinned. “Yeah, you’ll get over it. You know, your birthday is coming up. You’d better prepare for a repeat.”

“Oh God, I’m going to die,” Cas said, leaning on the pillows behind him, his eyes closed. “Can you make me some tea?” He asked weakly. “And where’s Jack?”

“Upstairs. Dude, how much did you drink, anyway?” Dean asked, chuckling, then turned to the kettle.

“I don’t know. Dorothy had the key to the wine cellar. It was a bad idea,” Cas said, then cracked one eye open. “The last time I was this drunk was when Balthazar visited us in Visby.”

“So I guess he’s gonna come to your birthday, then?” Dean asked, looking for some mint in his cabinet. “Y’know, Charlie’s gonna throw you a party, and you can’t do anything about it. We need to think of the guest list.”

Cas whined. “Stop talking about a party, or I’ll throw up.”

Dean snorted. “Alright, I’m shutting up.”

It took another hour for Cas to finally muster the strength to get up from the couch and head upstairs to pack. Since they were scheduled to return in a few days, they didn't bring all their luggage with them. Meanwhile, Dean and Jack resumed watching Star Wars. Cas descended the stairs just before the movie ended.

"Hey, are you well enough to leave the house?” Dean asked, getting up from the floor. “I want to take you guys for a walk before you go to Sweden. Porto is beautiful after sunset," he added. 

“It sounds good. Maybe some fresh air will actually help,” Cas smiled a little, still visibly tired from the night of drinking.

By the time they made their way from the city parking lot to the Cais da Ribeira promenade, the sky had turned dark, revealing the first visible stars. Outdoor cafes and restaurants spilled warm light onto the cobblestone streets, with the gentle glow of moonlight reflecting in the water below.

“This is pretty,” Jack stated, approaching the quay.

“Jack, don’t get too close to the river,” Cas cautioned from behind him.

“I know, Dad. I’m not a baby,” the boy shot back, observing the flow of the water.

Dean stopped beside Cas, gazing up at the stars above them. They stood close, their shoulders almost touching.

“How’s your headache, cowboy?” He asked, grinning.

“Fuck off, Dean,” Cas chuckled, sending him a smirk, then focusing on the river in front of him.

Dean observed Cas’s face for a moment. He was so beautiful, inside and out. And really soon, he would live in the same city as Dean. They wouldn't be limited to just phone calls and texts; they could meet as much as they wanted, he thought. Even if Charlie was right that someone might eventually snatch Cas away from him, it wouldn’t happen in those two weeks, right? There was no point in rushing things; Dean could at least wait for Cas’s birthday for a heart-to-heart. The dude had already so much going on right now.

“We didn’t get to go to Sintra,” Dean finally said. “Raincheck?”

Cas looked at him with a warm smile. “Of course, Dean.”

+

“You have to sign here and here,” Sam said to Cas, pointing at the papers spread on the table. Behind Castiel stood a handsome lawyer who introduced himself as Ishim and glanced at Cas from time to time. Despite his irritation, Dean understood they needed a professional to check the offer for his friend. Ten minutes before, he had finally confirmed that everything was alright with the documents.

“Done,” said Cas, putting the pen down. He took a deep breath, then stood up.

“Welcome to the family business, Cas,” Sam said, smiling widely and opening his arms, ready for the hug. Cas smiled back and embraced Dean’s disturbingly tall brother.

“Congratulations, Cas,” Dean said when Cas let go of Sammy and faced him.

Dean took a step forward, his arms enveloping Cas in a firm embrace. He tucked his chin into Cas’s shoulder. He felt his friend relax in his arms.

We should hug like this more often, Dean thought when they finally let go of each other.

“Thank you for attending on such short notice, Ishim,” his brother said to the lawyer. 

“The pleasure is all mine, believe me,” Ishim responded, shaking Sam’s hand. When he looked at Cas, he smiled a little wider. "I look forward to our cooperation in the future, Mr. Novak," he said, then shook Cas's hand, his touch lingering a little too long for Dean's liking. Then, he nodded to Dean and left the room. 

Sam shifted his attention to Cas once more. “Alright. I’ll introduce you to the staff now,” he said, collecting papers from the table.

Cas nodded, took his contract, then glanced at Dean and smiled a little. When Dean returned the smile, Cas followed Sam through the door. 

Dean lingered briefly before heading in the direction of his office. He had to finally take Cas to the hangar, he thought.

Just before reaching the door, he was stopped by Meg.

“Wow, you decided to finally show up at work?” She asked, smirking.

“Why are you here?” He said, frowning.

“Are you going to ask me the same question over and over again? I’m at work, just like you.”

Dean vaguely remembered something about her staying here on Crowley’s behalf.

“Okay, whatever. Do you need anything from me?” He asked her, hoping to end the conversation as quickly as possible.

“I just wanted to know if Clarence is on the payroll already,” she stopped, carefully observing Dean’s face. “You don’t like when I talk about him, do you?” She asked him quietly. Dean tried to ignore her and head to his office, but she took a step forward and leaned to his ear, blocking his path. 

“Oh, I see how it is. You would tap his ass, wouldn't you?” She sneered and narrowed her eyes. “I know you would, I saw how you’re looking at him. He is smoking hot, after all. Sorry to inform you, you’re barking up the wrong tree, lover boy,” she teased him by feigning sympathy. Her smirk turned into a vicious grin. “We were in the same team for  years , after all. We were traveling a lot, you know, spending time with each other. Trust me, I would know what he likes to do at night.” She winked at him and grinned wider, clearly satisfied with the hurt look Dean couldn’t contain any longer. She finally took a step back and passed him, probably heading for whatever ditch she had crawled out of. 

Chapter Text

Dean stood in front of his office for a moment, thoughts racing through his head. He hadn’t liked Meg before, but now he felt pure hatred towards the mean woman. He closed his eyes in an attempt to regain his composure.

Cas being straight was a game over for any potential relationship between them, Dean knew that. Meg knew that, too.

But if that was truly the case, what did all those moments, that Dean hadn’t been sure how to exactly explain, mean? Had it really just been his wishful thinking, imagining something that hadn’t actually been there?

He opened his eyes and took a big breath. He couldn’t let the she-demon get to his head, he thought. Even Charlie had confirmed she had seen something between him and Cas, and there was no way Dean was just this level of delusional and stupid. Meg could obviously be speaking the truth, but she could just as well be lying. With that in mind, he finally reached for the handle of his office door.

When he stepped inside, he suddenly realized he wasn’t alone.

“Jesus fuck!” He yelped startled, frowning at the figure sitting behind his desk. “Who the fuck are you?” He blurted at the blond stranger.

“Hey, you must be Dean! Don’t worry about ol’ little me!” The guy said, waving his hand dismissively and stood up from Dean’s chair, grinning. Dean realized he was really short. “I’m just here to rescue my little brother. He’s really irresponsible, this one,” the stranger said chuckling, then stepped closer to Dean. “Although, I must say, this time he outdid even himself. I’m Gabriel Novak,” the short dude stretched out his hand in greeting.

“Gabriel? You’re Cas’s older brother? How the fuck did you get in here, dude?” Dean said, shaking Gabriel’s hand. His eyes were in an unusual shade of gold. What was with this family and piercing eyes?

“Oh, Cassie told your charming security guard to let me in. He might’ve told me to wait in the conference room, but fuck knows where that is.”

Dean sighed, then shot Gabriel a strained smile. “Great. Cas is currently, uh… somewhere in the office. You want some coffee, Gabriel?”

“Sure, Dean-o! Lots of sugar with this one, please,” he said, looking around the room. When he walked up close to their 2015 sloop model standing on the shelf and started poking it, Dean sent him a glare.

“So… you’re building boats here or something?” Gabriel asked when he finally sat his ass on Dean’s couch.

“Yeah, or something,” Dean said, placing the mug in front of Cas’s brother, then focused his gaze on Gabriel’s eyes. “You said you came here to rescue Cas? What exactly did you mean by that?”

Gabe was clearly in no rush to respond. He slowly brought the mug to his lips and sipped a bit of the hot beverage, then sighed. “You see, my brother was always unpredictable. I'm not sure how well you know him, but Castiel never really gave in to any rules easily. Imagine my surprise when the little rebel called me a few days ago and told me he wants to move to another country to work in a company, of all places!” Gabe chuckled and shook his head, then glanced at Dean. “The kid is stubborn like a mule; he wouldn’t just agree to any offer thrown his way, so I figured he must be keeping a secret tucked away in the shadows.” Gabriel’s face suddenly became somber, and his golden eyes sharp. “I believe I’m currently looking at it, don’t I?” He said.

Dean frowned. “What are you talking about, dude?”

Without any warning, the door to Dean’s office flung open, revealing Cas's messy hair. His friend’s gaze immediately landed on Gabriel.

“What are you doing here? I told you to wait in the conference room,” Cas said, frowning.

“That’s all you’ve got for your favorite brother, Cassie?” Gabe asked, making a face.

Castiel glanced at Dean, then back at Gabriel, still frowning. “Gabriel, why are you here?”

“Well, my dear bro, glad you asked! I never thought I would need to play the role of the smart one in our family, but here we are. Tell me, do you really want to move here?”

“Yes,” Castiel said, narrowing his eyes at Gabe. “What are you going to do with that, exactly?”

“Me? I’m not gonna do anything, Cassie. I just want to make sure you know what you’re doing,” he said, glancing at Dean. “You know, with the salary and everything.”

Castiel didn’t break eye contact with his brother. “I’m great. I know what I’m doing and the salary is good," he said evenly with a dangerous gleam in his eyes.

“But-” Gabriel started.

Cas didn’t let him finish. “Drop it,” he said, lowering his voice.

Gabriel sighed, then looked at the carpet and nodded. “Alright,” he finally said, then pointed at Dean with his thumb. “But you’re not going to live in his house.”

“Excuse me?” Dean asked, surprised at the sudden change of subject, and pissed that Gabriel had a problem with him, too.

“You heard me, Dean-o,” Gabe said, then turned to Cas again. “I'll look for an apartment while you're gone. My nephew needs the best standards. I mean it.”

“Hey!” Dean said, frowning. His apartment was in the category of ‘good standards’, thank you very much. 

Cas ignored him. “Oh, so now it’s about Jack?” He asked in disbelief, tilting his head.

“Always, bro. Where is the kiddo, anyway?” Gabriel asked and looked around as if he expected Jack to be hiding somewhere behind the furniture. Cas rolled his eyes.

“He’s with a friend, Gabriel. Stop being dramatic,” Castiel said, then looked at Dean. “I’m sorry, I didn’t have time to tell you he came here. I have no clue why he even came. I’ll take him to the conference room now,” he said.

“You know I’m still here, right? I can hear you,” Gabe grumbled from the couch.

“No problem, Cas,” Dean said, ignoring Gabriel altogether.

+

Two hours later, Dean, Cas, Jack, and Gabriel, who insisted on driving with them to the airport, were standing in front of the departure gate. 

Even though Dean knew they would see each other soon, he felt a little sad seeing Cas and Jack go.

“I’m gonna miss you, guys,” he said truthfully, hugging first Jack, then Cas. When he took a step back, Dean saw a warm smile on Cas’s face.

“We’ll be back in about two weeks, Dean. I’ll let you know when we land,” Cas said, then turned to Gabriel and hugged him too. When he let go of his brother, Castiel turned to Jack. “Alright, let’s go,” he said, smiling softly. The boy nodded and waved one last time before they both disappeared behind the glass door.

“You know, they’re really important to me, Dean-o,” Gabriel said after a beat.

Dean glanced at him. “To you and me both, Gabe,” he said.

Gabriel turned his sharp eyes to him. “Just so you know, I don’t want to see them hurt.”

“Same here, champ,” Dean said, maintaining the intense eye contact. He was actually happy he had had so much practice with Cas in this department.

“Good. I hope it stays that way,” Gabriel finally said with a serious expression. Dean nodded. Gabriel observed him for a moment longer. “Great!” He finally said, grinning. “So, tell me, who’s planning Cassie’s birthday party? I need to talk to them, like ASAP.”

+

The following days were exceptionally shitty for Dean. Almost everything he did went wrong, and the problems seemed to pile up over time. For instance, the wood they had ordered for their decks three months ago turned out to be of low quality, requiring them to send it back. It obviously caused a delay in the release of the units, which fucked up the rest of their plans as well. Dean was also needed in the office since Castiel wasn’t back yet, which only deepened Dean’s misery.

If he were completely honest with himself, Meg’s words had put him in an awful mood. He snapped at his coworkers because of it, raising Sam’s, Benny’s, and Charlie’s eyebrows more than once.

Observing Dean in such a state, the wise Benny chose to stay out of his way.

Charlie, tired of Dean’s attitude, managed to get him to sit down and tell her what had happened. She, too, thought that Meg had just been trying to ruffle him up - and she had clearly succeeded. Charlie advised him to forget about the whole incident. Dean tried, but the task was much harder than he thought it would be.

Sam was a whole different story. The more frustrated Dean became, the more his brother wanted to talk about it. In a very 'Sam' way, he had tried to confront Dean several times, while Dean, in a very 'Dean' manner, had focused on avoiding his brother at all costs. Finally, Sammy cornered him in the conference room after the meeting on Friday.

“What is going on?” Sam asked, frowning.

“Nothing. I’m peachy,” Dean grumbled back.

Sam huffed. “Sure you are. Tell me what’s wrong, Dean. Do you feel trapped again?” He asked, worried.

Dean frowned. He hadn’t really thought about it for a while now. “What? No!” He replied, wondering how he could get out of this conversation. He started searching for any explanation that would placate his brother, but Sam spoke before he found one.

“Is it about your sexuality? Do you need help with… figuring things out?” Sam asked, observing Dean’s face.

Dean grinned at him. “Why? Are you gonna give me the talk about penises, Sammy?”

Sam winced. “Dean, not funny. Why are you so immature?”

“Dunno. Maybe I had to stop growing inside so you could grow so tall outside.”

Sam closed his eyes and took a deep breath, visibly tired of Dean's bullshit. “Be serious for five seconds,” he finally said, opening his eyes. “You're super pissed lately. You actually growl at people, you know that?”

Dean sighed. Sam obviously didn't want to let this go, so Dean had to tell him at least something. He couldn't just straight up admit what was really going on, especially that he was into Cas or that he wanted to strangle Meg - he was sure that Sam would do something stupid with that information.

“I'm uh… dealing with something lately. Someone pissed me off, and I need time to get over it, I guess,” he finally said.

Sam observed him for a moment, then nodded. “Okay. Do you need to talk about it?”

Dean was about as far from wanting to talk about it as possible, so he smiled sourly and responded “Nah, I just need some time,” praying for the conversation to end.

“Whatever you’re doing, it's clearly not working, Dean. Maybe you need some help to overcome this anger?” Sam asked, then added, “Therapy wouldn't kill you.”

“What?” Dean asked dumbly, not sure how they even got there. “Dude, no!” He exclaimed, frowning.

Sam huffed. “Dean, you can't work like that. You have to do something with the anger.”

“I’ll… work out?” Dean asked, unsure.

Sam ran his hand across his face, then looked at his brother with disbelief. “You know what? Fine. I can't make you go to therapy, even if you clearly need one. Just stop being mean, Dean,” he finally said and stood up from his chair. “If you ever want to talk, you know where to find me,” he finished and stepped out of the room.

+

On the evening of September 12, Dean found himself back at Porto airport, weaving his way through the crowd. Since everything had been going pretty shitty those last few days, Dean wasn’t even surprised when he'd found out an hour ago that Cas’s and Jack’s plane was apparently delayed. He looked around. Lots of people were moving in every direction. Dean sighed and reached for his phone. He didn’t manage to take it out of his jeans before something heavy collided with his abdomen.

“Uff…” Dean gasped, bending almost in half. He looked down at Jack’s blond hair. “Oh man, you’re strong,” he chuckled when Jack squeezed him. He hugged the boy back, smiling broadly.

“Hi Dean,” a muffled sound at the level of his ribs responded.

“Hiya, Jack. Did you run away from Cas again? He’s gonna be pissed at you, bud.”

“No, this time I let him.” Dean turned his head to the source of the deep, amused voice to his right. Cas stood right beside him, smiling even wider than Dean, his hair as messy as ever. He had his old, yellow sweater on from the day they had met.

“Cas,” Dean said, smiling. When Jack let go of him, Cas immediately took his son's place. Dean closed his eyes, basking in the sensation of his friend back in his arms.

“Hello, Dean. It’s good to see you again,” Cas murmured very close to Dean's ear. Dean felt all of his troubles going away at once.

"It’s good to see you too, guys," Dean finally said, pulling back with a smile. “Ready to go?” He asked, taking Jack's bag. 

Cas nodded, and the three of them walked through the bustling crowd toward the exit. “How was the flight?” Dean asked as they strolled through the terminal.

“Let's just say we're glad it's over,” Cas responded, with a strained smile.

“That great, huh? I made spaghetti, maybe it'll cheer you up a bit,” Dean said, getting excited reactions from both Jack and Castiel. He grinned and led them to the parking lot. They had decided to stay at Dean's until the apartment Gabriel had found a few days prior would be ready to move in.

During their time in Sweden, Castiel had managed to quit his old job, change Jack's schools, and send their things from Visby to Portugal. He had also initiated the long and painful process of selling his old apartment. Both Jack and Cas looked exhausted, the busy days of moving finally taking their toll.

“Hey, where’s Felix?” Dean asked, suddenly spooked that Jack’s snake would somehow crawl out from under his car seat at any moment.

“We left him with Jack’s grandparents for now,” Cas supplied beside him. “I’m going to take him with me the next time I travel to Sweden. We didn’t want to burden you with having a snake in your house,” he said, smirking. Dean nodded, feeling slightly relieved. He didn’t even think about arguing with Cas regarding his courage on this particular topic.

Once they reached Dean's home and stepped through the door, Jack walked straight to the sofa and flopped onto it with his face buried in the cushions. Dean chuckled, then turned to Cas, who still stood by the door.

“You’re going to need that,” he said and handed Cas a spare key to his apartment.

“Dean…” Cas started, but Dean stopped him before he could share any brilliant ideas about why he shouldn't have Dean's spare keys.

“I don't care if you won't live here for long. I want you to have it,” he said, then turned to his kitchen space.

Seeing his guests' state of exhaustion, Dean suggested eating dinner in front of the TV instead of at the table.

“What are your plans for tomorrow?” He asked when everybody was holding a plate with hot food.

“We need to visit the new school,” Cas said, stuffing his mouth with spaghetti. Dean smiled at the blissful expression on Cas’s face, undoubtedly caused by the pasta. “We’ll go to the office afterward,” Cas continued after he swallowed. “Sam says there’s a meeting that you don’t want to attend. He also added something about you, acting like a savage lately,” he chuckled, then glanced at Dean, who made a face. “Why are you acting like a savage, Dean?” He asked, smirking.

“I’m not. Shut up,” Dean grumbled back, cursing his brother in his head. Sending Cas after him was really classy.

“I see. Anyway, Eileen promised to take care of Jack after we visited the school. She’ll meet us at the office.”

“You can totally leave Jack with me in the hangar, Cas, there is no point in engaging Eileen tomorrow. I'm gonna show him how we do the rigging,” Dean said, then turned to the boy. “What do you say, you wanna see how we build boats?”

“Yes!” Jack exclaimed, glancing at Cas. “Can I go, Dad?”

Cas’s gaze flickered between Jack and Dean for a moment, finally stopping at Dean. “Is it safe?” He asked, worried.

“Yeah. Besides, I won't let anything happen to him,” Dean responded.

“Okay. You can go, Jack, but you have to listen to Dean at all times. Is that clear?”

Jack nodded happily, his mouth full of spaghetti.

Cas looked at Dean again. “I have one more request,” he stopped, observing Dean’s face. “Will you help me buy a car tomorrow?”

Dean grinned. “I thought you’re gonna need one. Yeah, no problem, man. What are we looking for?”

“I’m not sure. But I think I don’t want a completely new one,” Cas said, lost in thoughts. Meanwhile, Dean searched in his head every place in Porto they could look for a good car. Maybe they could even find a classic somewhere?

“Don’t worry, I’ve got you covered,” he finally said, then glanced at Jack. “So, you both start on Monday, huh? Big day.”

“I need a new backpack. And sneakers,” Jack stated.

Cas looked at the boy and sighed. “I guess we need to visit a shopping mall on Friday.”

“As long as it won’t take up your whole day, guys. Family dinner’s on Friday this time, and we’re doing it at my place,” Dean said, then added, “You’re obviously a part of this mess now, you need to be here by 6.”

Castiel smiled his little, shy smile, then nodded.

Dean couldn’t help but marvel at how, despite all the chaos, moments like these made everything feel right. For the first time in almost two weeks, he felt like he was finally at home.

Who cared about some Meg if Dean had Cas here, with him now?

+

When Jack and Cas appeared in the hangar the next day, Dean and Benny were in the middle of laying the deck on one of the boats. 

Even if Dean had seen Castiel in his suit this very morning, it still shocked him how good he looked now, the handsome bastard.

“Hey, how did it go?” Dean asked them when he managed to get off the boat, leaving Benny to the task. One glance at Cas from up close let him determine his friend was nervous. Castiel looked at his son.

“It's okay, I guess,” Jack responded instead of his dad.

Dean frowned. “You don't seem too convinced, bud.”

“It's just that my new teacher seems strange, that's all,” Jack said, glancing at Castiel. Dean's frown deepened.

“Jack, give Miss Hannah a chance. She's nice,” Cas said to the boy.

“Maybe she is for you,” Jack responded, raising his eyebrows, then looked at Dean. “She flirted with Dad for almost forty minutes.”

Castiel glanced at Dean nervously, then turned to the boy again. “She did no such thing, Jack,” he said calmly. “I'm sure you'll find a common ground with her.”

Dean observed the conversation, not really sure if he should be jealous or amused. Finally, he chuckled and interjected, before their banter would escalate.

“Okay, Cas, why don't you go to the office? I'm sure Sammy's waiting for you by now. We've got work to do here, y'know,” he said, putting a hand on Jack's shoulder. Castiel looked at him, then nodded and turned to Jack again. Before he could say anything, the boy spoke, frustrated. “I'll listen to Dean and be careful, I get it,” he said, his brow furrowed.

Castiel sighed, then exchanged another glance with Dean. “See you at 5,” he said, smiling a little, then turned around and marched outside. Once Dean tore his gaze away from his perfect ass, he looked back at the boy.

“Give your Dad a rest, kiddo. He’s real stressed already,” Dean said, searching Jack’s face.

“I get that he’s stressed, it’s just that he’s also stubborn,” Jack said, averting his gaze. There was clearly more to the story, but Dean didn’t want to push.

“Hey, it’s gonna get better with time, y’know? Give it a month or two, you only just got here,” he said, smiling at the kid.

The boy’s angry gaze landed on him again. “You’re stubborn too, Dean. And just so you know, you’re not hiding well that you like him,” the boy deadpanned, crossing his arms on his chest. 

Dean's eyes went wide. He cleared his throat awkwardly. “What do you mean, Jack? Of course, I like your Dad, we're friends,” he said, aiming for casual, but his voice was a little too high.

Jack sighed, then narrowed his eyes. He did it exactly like Castiel, which would amuse Dean if he wasn’t so stressed at the whole situation.

“Cut it out, Dean,” Jack said, then tilted his head. “Why don't you do something? He likes you too, you know? He's just too scared to admit it. I don’t want some stupid teacher flirting with him,” Jack said, frustrated.

Dean stared at him, not really sure what to say. The kid sure as hell didn’t look horrified by the prospect of his dad dating another man. If his anger was any clue, it looked like he actually supported the idea of Dean and Cas together. Hell, he had just said Castiel liked Dean back. Even if Dean’s heart beat a little bit faster at this piece of information, it wasn’t Dean's place to talk about Cas’s love life with his kid. In fact, it would be a serious privacy violation if he let it continue. 

Dean looked around, but luckily, there weren't many workers at the hangar close enough to hear them, and the ever-present buzz of their equipment drowned out the conversation. He glanced at Jack again. “You think I’m too small to understand what’s really happening, but that’s not true,” the boy stated stubbornly.

Dean closed his eyes, trying to calm himself down. Jack definitely knew something was going on, so Dean owed him at least some explanation. 

“Alright,” he finally said, then turned to the boat to his left and raised his voice. “Hey, Benny?”

His friend’s head appeared a moment later from behind the hull. “Yeah, chief?”

“I’m gonna need ten minutes. You good?”

“Sure,” Benny said and waved, then disappeared again. 

Dean turned to the boy. “Let’s take a walk, Jack,” he said, leading the way towards the exit. When they reached the quay, Dean sat on the wooden edge, his legs hanging above the water. Jack followed suit, mirroring Dean's actions. They sat like that for a while until Dean worked up the courage to open his mouth. 

“You’re right, I like your Dad,” he finally said, looking at the water in front of him. There was no point in denying it, he thought. “I’m pretty sure Cas wouldn’t be thrilled if he knew I’m talking about it with you,” he continued, glancing at the boy. Jack looked calm, but his brows were furrowed. “But you’re right, you’re big enough to know what’s going on. I want to talk with him about uh… us,” Dean said, clearing his throat awkwardly. “I’m just waiting for the right moment, Jack. Those things are not easy for me,” he said, wincing.

“Are you scared?” Jack asked.

Dean raised one of his eyebrows at him. “Of course I’m scared, I’m terrified. But I really, really don’t want you involved in this, bud. And I’d like you to not say anything about Castiel’s uh… interests to me, kiddo,” he said. 

“Why not?” Jack whined. “I could help!”

Dean sighed. “I know you could. And I have no doubt you’d be great at it, too. But you see, this is too serious for me. I need to do it myself.” 

“Why?” Jack asked again, his eyes determined.

Dean observed him for a moment, then said, “You know, it’s like achieving something really important. You have to work for it to get it. Like uh… Like Aragorn was the only person who could call upon the Army of the Dead, wielding his sword, Anduril.”

God, I am a nerd. 

Jack slowly nodded. “I think I understand,” he finally said. “But this is important for me, too.”

Dean turned his face to the water again, then put his arm on Jack's shoulder and hugged him. “You are already doing enough, kiddo. Your support in all this is really awesome, Jack,” Dean said. He felt a gentle warmth spreading through his chest, followed by a lump forming in his throat. He tried hard to swallow it down. When he was finally sure he managed to take control over his voice again, he glanced at Jack. “Do you think this conversation can stay between us, at least for now?” He asked. Jack nodded, sniffling. Dean smiled a little. “Alright. Let’s get back to the hangar. I promised to show you how we build boats, after all.”

+

Five minutes to 5 in the afternoon, Dean saw Castiel standing under the boat they were currently working on. Dean waved to him, then turned to Jack. “Dad’s here, champ. Let’s go say hi,” he said, leading Jack to the ladder. When both of them managed to get down, Jack started explaining excitedly to Cas what they had been doing during the day, his earlier anger long forgotten. Cas nodded, watching the kid with a smile, occasionally glancing at Dean. When Jack finally finished his tale, Dean took both of them on a little tour, showing Cas different workstations. Jack interjected from time to time, sharing his knowledge from the whole day spent in the facility. Finally, they stopped in front of their biggest project yet, a 60 feet offshore cruiser. Dean had done everything in his power to keep the boat as slim and graceful as possible, even if it wasn’t an easy task with such a big vessel. 

While Dean delved into the technical details, Cas listened to him intently the whole time.

“Cher, you better stop talkin’ already, or Castiel’s ear might just fall off,” drawled a voice from behind them a few minutes later. When Dean turned around, he saw Benny, already changed out of his work clothes, walking in their direction. “Good to see you again, brother,” he said to Cas and shook his hand, smiling.

“You too, Benny. I find your work fascinating. And it’s a pleasure to hear about it from someone as qualified as Dean,” Cas said politely, almost making Dean blush. Dean fought hard to control his face.

Benny chuckled. “Don’t feed this man’s ego, Castiel. He’s already full of himself.”

Cas tilted his head. “I disagree. If anything, Dean’s constantly questioning his abilities, when he’s clearly very good at what he’s doing,” he said, glancing at Dean with a small smile. Now this blush Dean couldn’t stop even if he tried.

“Alright,” Dean said quietly, looking down. Hearing those words from Cas made his head spin a little.

“C’mon, brother, I know he’s great and all. I’m just jokin’ here,” Benny chuckled nervously. Castiel nodded and smiled politely, but Dean noticed his eyes were a little harder than usual. He could tell by now that Cas, for some reason, was slightly irritated.

Dean finally decided to break the awkward silence. “How’s Andrea doing, man? Haven’t seen her in a while,” he said, turning his gaze to Benny. His friend’s mood instantly dropped.

“I guess the pregnancy isn't easy,” he finally said. “She’s not feeling great at the moment. I hope it’ll pass.”

Dean frowned. “Oh shit, man, sorry to hear that. Is there anything I could do to help?” He asked, observing his friend. Benny had seemed a little off lately, but since Dean hadn’t been great as well, he had solely focused on his own misery. A pang of remorse washed over him. He was a shitty friend, wasn’t he?

Benny smiled weakly. “Actually, I wouldn’t mind a beer over the weekend, chief.”

Dean nodded and patted Benny’s shoulder. “No problem, man. We’ll work something out,” he said, then glanced at Cas. He was smiling politely, which could only mean he was still pissed. Dean decided to ignore it, at least for now. He turned to Benny again. “Remember you can call me anytime. See you tomorrow?”

“Yeah. Have a nice evening,” Benny said, tipping his black hat goodbye. Shortly after he left the hangar, Dean and Jack went to change into their normal clothes. The weather in Porto in September was finally perfect for a flannel shirt, so Dean took every opportunity to add an extra layer. He loved his flannels, even if Crowley constantly made fun of him for wearing them. 

“How was the meeting today, Cas?” He asked his friend on their way to Dean’s car. Luckily, he seemed back to normal again.

“Productive. I’ve met Mildred,” he said, glancing at Dean. “People from my department are nice. I’ve actually got some homework to do.” 

Dean frowned at him. “You didn’t even officially start working, your first day should be on Monday, man,” he said.

“I like to be prepared. And I need to revise your budget, so it’s actually good we’re currently staying at your place. I’m going to need your help on Saturday,” he said, smirking.

Dean groaned. He hated working over weekends. “I knew you were gonna be a menace,” he grumbled under his breath, making Jack giggle. 

“You ready to look for the car of your dreams?” Dean asked Cas when they were finally sitting inside of the Mustang.

“It just needs to drive, Dean,” Cas said, quirking his eyebrows.

Dean’s mouth opened in shock. “It just needs to… Cas! Are you serious?!” He asked, horrified. “Cars are important! This is a place where you spend your time, listening to good music. The seats have to be comfortable, the wheel nice to grip, and the sound of the engine should take your breath away. It all matters, Castiel Novak. Why are you laughing?”

Cas was giggling beside him, his shoulders shaking. It was infectious, and soon Jack started laughing too. In the end, even if still a little grumpy, Dean couldn’t help but laugh with them.

+

“Okay, and what about this one?” Dean asked, pointing at a nice, classic Mercedes Benz. It was black, cool, and quite affordable. Cas didn’t look impressed. He hadn’t been impressed by any of the models they had seen so far. They had visited three different car dealers and by now, Dean started to lose hope. 

Suddenly, Cas’s eyes widened with excitement and he stopped, causing a bored-to-death Jack to walk right into his back. Dean’s eyes followed Cas’s line of sight. Before them stood the most impressive, golden pimp-mobile Dean had ever seen.

“I want this one,” Cas said, pointing at the Lincoln Continental. It technically  was  a classic, Dean thought. If he wasn’t mistaken, it was a model from 1978. It’d have to be imported from the States by some maniac, no doubt. Dean observed the car for a moment, then glanced at Cas. Dude looked seriously excited, eyes gleaming and all. Dean shrugged and approached the monstrosity without a second thought.

“Alright, let’s see what’s under the hood, then,” he said, pretty sure that whatever he would find, he’d be willing to fix it just so Cas could buy the silly car.

It soon turned out Dean wouldn’t have to actually do much. Whoever had owned the Lincoln before, had treated her well.

“She’s in good condition, Cas,” Dean said, closing the hood. Castiel beamed at him in response, making Dean's insides jump. He turned his gaze to the car again. “We should take her for a test drive,” he finally said, opening the door to the passenger’s side.

30 minutes later, Castiel emerged from the car dealer's office with his new set of car keys and documents confirming he was now the owner of the golden tragedy. He was grinning widely.

“Thank you, Dean. I've never really cared about my cars before, but this one is different. I really like her,” he said when he approached Dean and Jack, waiting by the Lincoln.

“Don't mention it,” Dean responded, grinning back.

“As a token of gratitude, I'd like to invite you to dinner now, if you're free?” Cas asked, unsure. 

“You know me, I won’t say no to food,” Dean said, smirking, while Jack nodded beside him. “Do you want to go somewhere specific?”

“Actually, yes. I found a restaurant I wanted us to try. Will you follow me?” Cas asked.

Soon all three of them were sitting in their cars - Jack and Cas in the Lincoln, and Dean behind them in his Mustang. As they drove through the city, observing the ridiculous rear of the golden car, Dean thought about his conversation with Jack. He would be lying if he said the boy’s words were not significant. His acceptance of Dean into their lives was extremely important, if not crucial, in the potential scenario of Dean dating his dad, but weirdly enough, Dean didn’t focus on that. The thing was, he started to get really attached to the energetic kid as well. More than once, he had caught himself thinking about buying something he thought Jack would like, and he had enjoyed moments teaching the boy things he himself knew. Knowing that Jack liked spending time with him, too, awakened his instinct to protect the kid and make sure he was happy.

He suddenly remembered the conversation he and Cas had in his living room not so long ago, Cas’s words were clear in his head - It’s quite simple, Dean. I've never met the right person either.  Dean frowned. Could he possibly be the right person for both Cas and Jack? Dean’s heart seemed to be already hooked on this idea, even though in his mind, it still appeared kinda terrifying. Was he even built to be a family man? 

Who was he kidding? He would cook, clean, and make lunch for all three of them happily until the day he died, wouldn’t he? Dean sighed, focusing on following Cas’s car through the city.

+

Dean was in the middle of chopping vegetables when he heard the door to his apartment open, followed by two cheerful voices. He leaned back so he could greet Cas and Jack, currently loaded with plenty of shopping bags.

“Hi, Dean!” Jack said first when he spotted Dean’s head behind the see-through shelf. Castiel looked up from untying his shoes and smiled. Meanwhile, Jack took part of the bags from the floor and ran upstairs to their room.

“How was your day?” Cas asked Dean, approaching the kitchen space. In the ideal world of Dean’s mind, he would hug him from behind and kiss him on the neck. Unfortunately, Cas did no such thing. He marched to the fridge instead, putting the groceries inside. He was wearing blue jeans and a black hoodie today, making him look soft and cozy.

“Not bad,” Dean responded, focusing on the eggplant in front of him again. When he heard a chuckle to his left, he sighed. “You’re weird, Cas, you know that?” He asked, amused.

“I don’t mind,” Castiel said from behind him, much closer than he was a moment ago. Dean nearly cut his finger off, startled by his deep voice. When he turned his head, he saw Cas looking over his shoulder. “Do you need help with anything?” He asked Dean, watching him with an intensity that probably only Cas could muster. 

Dean cleared his throat, then looked down again. “Nah, I’m good. Did you find any vegan pie in the store?”

“Yes, however, they had only apple flavor,” Cas responded, walking to the kettle. “And I bought a few different kinds of tea for you to try. Should I make you some?”

“Yeah, why not?” Dean said, salting the eggplant. He had already made a salad, following a recipe Cas had provided him with, so the only thing left to do was to finish the curry and cook some rice. “Did you get everything you wanted for Jack?” He asked, rummaging through his spices.

“Unfortunately we still don’t have all the textbooks, but he can always borrow one from the school library until we find them in a different bookstore,” he said, looking through the cupboard for mugs. Dean noticed that Cas had repeatedly chosen a bigger, green one for his beverages. Dean decided to keep this information for future reference. 

“May I turn some music on?” Castiel asked when he put the mug with tea next to Dean. It smelled suspiciously nice.

Dean sent him a grin. “I thought we were past asking stupid questions?” He said, lifting an eyebrow and getting a smirk and a nod from Cas in return. Soon, the room filled with the pleasant sound of Zepp’s ‘Dancing Days’. It meant Castiel had chosen the ‘Houses of the Holy’ record.

Interesting, thought Dean, stirring the content of the pot in front of him. He knew that the album contained ‘The Rain Song’, which probably didn't escape Cas's attention either. He glanced at Cas, who was now lying comfortably on the couch with a book (it was in French, this time), looking completely oblivious, his tea on the table next to him. Dean turned back to the curry. Only a few days were left until Cas's birthday, he thought. 

The truth was, Dean started to panic slightly. He had formed a plan, which specifically involved a gift he had prepared for Cas on his birthday, but the less time until the party, the more he doubted that his idea would be enough. It didn't help that Meg's words still lingered at the back of his head, even if Dean's guts told him there was just no way in hell that Cas was straight. 

Besides, Dean must have been doing something right, since Castiel was currently lying on  his  couch in  his  living room, looking relaxed and happy. Dean just hoped that his inability to deal with his feelings a little bit better wouldn't eventually scare Cas away. 

The rest of his family would be here in half an hour, so Dean decided to focus solely on dinner from then on, leaving his worrying thoughts behind him, at least until the rice was ready. He finally took a sip of his tea. It turned out quite tasty, to Dean’s utter shock.

In the end, his gramophone didn’t manage to play ‘The Rain Song’ before they heard the first knock on the door. The table was almost ready by then. Cas and Jack had arranged the plates and cutlery, while Dean had absolutely aced the basmati rice.

"Come in," Dean shouted, putting wine glasses next to the plates. When the door opened, they saw a very pregnant Eileen, Sammy, DJ, and Mary entering the apartment. Before anybody managed to say anything, DJ quickly scanned the room and, when he spotted Jack, he started running in his direction. Dean moved on instinct, catching the little boy almost in mid-flight, too afraid to let him crush Jack with pure energy and speed.

"DJ, oh my God," Eileen said, then turned her angry glare to Sam, who had held the kid’s hand moments earlier.

"Sorry, he ran away," Dean’s giant brother said apologetically to his wife. She was probably the only person in the world who could strike such fear into Sam in such a short time.

"Don’t sweat it, Sammy," Dean said with a giggling DJ still in his arms. He glanced at the boy. "Don’t do that, squid. You could seriously hurt Jack, y’know? We have to be gentle when we hug people we really like, okay?" He explained calmly. DJ nodded, so Dean put him on the ground. This time, the kid approached Jack in a more civilized manner and hugged him sweetly. Satisfied, Dean glanced at Cas, who was watching him with soft eyes and a small smile. Dean frowned but didn’t have time to ask what was that about before his brother’s arms blocked any view of the outside world. He hugged him back, patting Sam on the back, then turned his attention to Eileen, standing right behind his husband with a hand on her enormous belly.

"Any day now," she said, chuckling. Dean hugged her, careful not to squeeze her. To his utter surprise, Mary tugged his sleeve after that, demanding to be lifted up.

"Hey, princess," he said, hugging her gently and then putting her back down on the floor. "It’s good to see you guys. Please, sit down," he continued while Eileen signed something to Cas and Jack.

“Hey, whose pimpmobile is parked in your driveway, Dean?” Sam asked, walking to the chair. 

Cas gave him an unimpressed look. “It’s my new car and I like it,” he said, glancing at Dean.

“Yeah, there is no accounting for taste, man,” Dean said to Sam, then winked at Cas with a smile. Sam frowned but seemed to be smart enough to drop the topic.

Once everyone was seated at the table, Castiel helped Dean pour drinks of choice for their guests. Benny had informed earlier that he wouldn’t be able to make it today, so when Charlie and Dorothy joined them soon after, Dean placed the pot with steaming curry in the middle of the table.

"Dean," Sam said with wide eyes a moment later, observing the bowl of kale in front of him. "Is that a salad?"

"Yep," Dean said, accenting the 'p' at the end. He grinned. Sam looked like he was about to have a heart attack. Charlie giggled at the other side of the table. 

His brother looked at Castiel, still in shock. “Thank you. With you here there is actually a chance he’s going to live to his old days,” he said, holding Cas’s hand.

“Hey!” Dean yelled, then pointed at the salad. “This is actually good. It turned out you just have no friggin' idea how to make a tasty kale, Sammy,” he said, observing how his brother’s facial expression changed to a perfect bitch face.

“Let’s eat,” Cas interjected before Sam could come up with a clever response. 

As the first compliments about the curry flowed in, Sam turned to Castiel.

“So, Cas, I’ve heard Gabriel is coming to your party on Tuesday, I’ll be happy to finally meet him,” he said. Dean winced, making Cas chuckle.

“I suppose he’s coming, yes. He wouldn’t miss any opportunity to show up at a party, I’m sure,” Cas responded, smirking.

“Who else is gonna be there?” Dean asked, glancing between Charlie and Castiel. 

“Actually, Gabriel gave me a list of people, but I wasn’t sure if Cas would feel comfortable with all of them. When I asked him about it, he picked only a few names,” Charlie said, glancing nervously at Dean. “There’s gonna be Cas’s second brother… uh…” she stopped, frowning.

“Jimmy,” Cas interjected, helpfully.

“Right, that one! Then we have Balthazar, Benjamin, and Meg,” she glanced at Dean again, smiling tightly. Dean sighed. He wasn’t gonna survive this stupid party.

“Balthazar? Your former teammate?” Sammy asked, looking excited. Castiel nodded. “This is amazing, the three members of team Alinghi are going to be in one place,” Sam said, his eyes gleaming. Dean was starting to get really annoyed by his brother’s nerdy attitude. 

“Hey, isn’t Balthy worried about exposing himself?” Dean asked Cas quietly when Sam started explaining to Charlie and Dorothy the phenomenon of Cas’s team winning the America's Cup.

“He said he wants to come, anyway. I guess he doesn’t care anymore,” Castiel responded, keeping his voice down.

Once they finished eating the curry, Dean cleaned up the plates and sneaked out to his bedroom. He came back with a long, quite heavy package, getting everyone’s attention. He wasn't entirely sure if he should do it in front of everyone else, but he finally decided that it was as good a time as any.

“Jack,” he turned to the boy, “I don’t know if you even remember that, but I had actually promised you a present back in June and since you guys moved here now, I figured I should get you something more significant. I hope you’re gonna like it,” he ended weakly, passing the box to the kid. When Jack ripped the package, they all saw a shiny, long sword of Aragorn sitting at the bottom of the box, with runes and all.

“Is that Anduril? Oh my God!” Charlie yelped, almost sticking her head into the carton.

Jack’s eyes sparkled and his mouth opened as he raised the sword up. It wasn't sharp, but it was made of metal. Dean had ordered it after Cas and Jack flew back to Sweden, hoping the boy’s love for the ‘Lord of the Rings’ series would last.

“Whoa,” Jack said in awe. Cas looked a little shocked, but a small smile danced on his lips.

“I thought that the king of Gondor had to have his own sword, y’know?” Dean stated with a grin.

“I can’t believe you still think I’m the nerdy one, Dean,” Sam said with a huff. Dean sent him an annoyed look, but quickly forgot about his brother's attitude, observing Jack marching through his living room with the piece of weaponry. DJ and Mary followed him, mesmerized by the shiny sword.

“Dean, this is too much,” said Cas, observing ecstatic Jack as well. 

“C’mon, I wanted to give him something nice. He deserved it after I stole you away in June,” Dean gave Cas a grin. Cas rolled his eyes at him, but he was still smiling, so Dean considered it a success. 

Soon after that, Dean served the vegan apple pie and Jack took the kids upstairs to show them a new board game he had bought with Castiel earlier that day. He wanted to take the sword with him, but Cas had been afraid Jack would start swinging it around and hurt Mary or DJ, so they made him leave it at the coffee table. 

“Castiel, did you manage to find an apartment here?” Dorothy asked when Dean poured wine into her glass. He himself had decided to stick with the tea, offering it to Eileen, too. Seeing Dean enjoying his beverage, Castiel sent him a sweet smile that melted Dean’s insides a bit.

“Actually, my brother did. I haven't seen it in person yet, only in some photos. We’re going to move in on Wednesday. I hope we won't have to wait much longer for the furniture and the rest of our things that I shipped from Visby,” Cas answered. 

Even if it seemed a logical thing to do, Dean was still unhappy about Castiel’s decision to rent his own apartment in Porto. If it were up to him, Dean would gladly adapt his apartment to Jack’s and Cas’s needs. He had one more, completely unused room that could be remodeled, or even enlarged at the expense of a guest room. However, he was too afraid to talk about it with Castiel, who for some reason drew the line at their living arrangements.

“The apartment is closer to Jack's school than Dean's. I hope we will be comfortable there,” Cas continued, smiling a little. “I'm actually going to need your recommendations for a good gym in the area,” he said, glancing at Sam. Dean sent his friend a dirty look. He had a gym membership, dammit. He simply hadn't had time to go there more than once a week lately. Cas raised his eyebrow at him, amused, but before he could say anything, Sam started praising his fitness center and describing probably all the sports classes that took place there.

“This tea is amazing,” Eileen said after a moment, looking at Dean. “Where did you get it?” She asked.

“I didn’t, it was Cas,” Dean said, pointing at Castiel with his thumb.

“I found it at the coffee shop in the Old Town. They also serve their beverages on site,” Cas explained.

“Really? I wouldn’t mind you showing me where it is, Cas. Are you free tomorrow evening? I think my kids would benefit from some time spent only with their Daddy,” Eileen said, glancing at Sam with a mischievous glint in her eyes.

“I have nothing planned,” Cas said, smiling at her. “I’d be happy to go with you.”

“Great, it’s settled then,” she said, then turned to her husband with a grin. “Sam, you’re on kids' duty tomorrow evening. You’re taking Jack, too.” 

Sam, who had gesticulated something vividly to Dorothy, stopped speaking mid-word and looked at his wife in surprise, not sure what was going on, but eventually shrugged and nodded.

As the conversations around the table continued, Dean felt a pleasant warmth in his ribcage. His family was sitting together, safe, happy, and sated, chatting and laughing at bad jokes. He glanced at Cas, immersed in conversation with Eileen and Charlie. He fit here so well, almost like they knew each other all of their lives, he thought.

Suddenly, a hard knock on Dean’s door interrupted the homey feeling filling the air around them. Dean frowned, then glanced at Cas, who shrugged and shook his head. They were not waiting for anybody else this evening. 

Dean stood up and walked to the door, opening it to the unknown guest. To his surprise, on the other side, he saw Gabe in a light blue suit.

“Dean-o!” he yelled happily at a baffled Dean. “I heard there’s a family dinner here! May I join you?” he asked, wiggling his eyebrows.

“What are you doing here?” asked Cas, suddenly materializing beside Dean.

“Hello to you too, bro,” Gabriel said, squeezing himself inside. “Did you actually forget about me? You know, a member of your family?” he asked, a little offended.

Dean turned to his new guest. “Hey, not that we’re not thrilled, but uh… how did you even find my place, man?” he asked, glancing at Cas, who frowned deeply. He clearly had no clue how Gabe knew where Dean’s apartment was either.

“My sweet Jack-o texted his favorite uncle the coordinates, duh,” Gabe said, glancing between Dean and Cas. When they didn’t react in any way, Gabe clearly decided to just ignore them and walked further inside the apartment, stopping by the table. “Hello, dear friends! I’m Gabriel, Castiel’s older, wiser, more handsome brother,” he said with a wide smile.

While Dean’s guests started to introduce themselves to Gabriel, Castiel huffed and glanced at Dean. “I’m so sorry, I had no idea he was going to show up here,” he said quietly. “I need to speak with Jack and explain to him he shouldn’t text people your address.”

“Hey, don’t worry. It’s not a big deal,” Dean gave Cas a reassuring smile then turned to the table and walked back to his seat. Castiel followed shortly after him. In the meantime, Gabriel helped himself to a portion of apple pie.

“This is awesome,” said Gabriel in between bites, then turned to his brother. “So, Portugal! Big change, Cassie!” he said, sipping the wine. Cas rolled his eyes but nodded, reaching for his tea.

“Gabe, I can’t help but wonder, what do you do for a living?” Dean asked, frowning.

“Gabriel owns a popular ice cream chain,” Cas responded instead of Gabe, who confirmed Cas’s words with a nod.

“That’s right. And I’m currently looking for some places to expand my brand in Portugal,” he said, glancing at Castiel with a grin. “My dream is to live close to my favorite brother, you see. He needs me so badly!”

“No, I don’t,” Cas grumbled, narrowing his eyes at Gabe.

“Yes, you do. Anyways, you’re gonna see me way more often now. I believe I found a perfect spot for my ice cream parlor in Porto. So far I stayed at the hotel, but I think I’m gonna crash at your place for a while, Cassie. Won’t it be nice to live together again?” Gabriel chirped, smirking at Cas. Dean sighed, then glanced at Cas as well. His friend looked at the ceiling, trying to find his patience, no doubt. Gabriel didn’t seem to mind and soon turned his attention to Sam. “Aren’t you a big fella?” He asked Dean’s brother, causing Eileen to snort into her tea. Sam frowned at him but didn’t get to respond before Dorothy occupied Gabriel’s attention with questions about his new ice cream shop.

“Hey, how are those boats we’re sending to La Rochelle?” Sam asked Dean after a beat.

“Oh c’mon, man, do we need to talk about it now?” Dean whined.

“Why are we sending our sailboats there?” Cas interjected, curiously.

“There is a boat show at the end of September in France called ‘The Grand Pavois’. You and I are going there, too. I will provide you with a year-round schedule of these events on Monday,” Sam responded. 

“Sammy, I swear to God, shut your face. We are not going to discuss work over dinner,” Dean said, glaring at his brother, who rolled his eyes at him. Dean absolutely hated mixing his personal life with work, which Sam did almost every time the opportunity presented itself.

“Wait, Dean,” Cas said, looking at Sam. “Can I take Jack with me?” He asked, suddenly worried.

Dean frowned. “Cas, there is no need to do that. The kid can easily stay here with me.”

“Oh no he won’t,” Gabe suddenly interjected.

“Gabriel,” Cas glared at him dangerously.

“He’s got an uncle here now, he can stay with me,” Gabe said, and even if his tone remained cheerful, his eyes hardened. He looked at Cas, starting a disturbing staring contest between them. Dean was pretty sure they could sit like that for the next few hours, without blinking.

“Do you have a problem with him staying at my place, Gabe?” Dean asked, frowning. Gabriel was seriously starting to get on his nerves.

“There is no problem,” Cas responded instead of his brother, then looked at Dean, his eyes instantly softening. “We’re going to ask Jack when it comes to that,” he said, smiling a little. Dean glanced at Gabe again, but Cas’s brother was already looking the other way. 

The rest of the evening passed without another incident. Despite his strange interest in Sam and an odd fear of Dean's apartment, Gabe turned out to be quite funny and talkative. When Jack and Sam’s kids came down from the upstairs room, Gabriel joined them in a peculiar game of knights and princesses that seemed to have no particular rules beyond running, screaming, and throwing pillows at each other. Dean enjoyed the chaos, basking in the feeling of family all around him. 

Around 9 in the evening, Mary started yawning, so Sam and Eileen declared they should get back home. Soon after they had left, Dorothy, Charlie, and Gabe cracked open another bottle of wine and moved to Dean’s couch. Dean found some snacks he still had hidden inside of his cupboards and served them with hummus and carrot sticks, while Cas went upstairs to put Jack to bed. Dean was in the middle of preparing another tea for himself when he heard his name mentioned by Charlie in the discussion.

“I can only speak for myself, Gabriel. You should really ask Dean about it,” his friend said, glancing in his direction.

Dean frowned, walking to the coffee table. “Ask me about what?”

“I was just curious about your interests, Dean-o,” Gabe said, sipping his wine. “Me and Red were discussing our sexualities. I’m a pan, you know? It’s good to meet other LGBTQ+ in the wild,” he said, smiling. Dean observed him for a moment but didn’t spot any mockery or ill intentions on his face.

“Alright,” Dean said carefully, sitting down. “What do you want to know?” 

“Oh, just the usuals, like where do you like to stick what,” he chuckled. 

Dean gulped. He was still very new to this. Was it normal to just randomly talk about his sex life with people he didn’t know very well? He didn't mind sharing some things with Charlie, but even in front of her, he wouldn't go into any detail. Besides, Dean’s bisexual experience was limited to a few masturbation sessions, three online articles, and a small number of gay porn. 

His face must have done something to reveal his inner turmoil because Dorothy apparently decided to take pity on him. “Gabe’s joking, Dean. He just wants to know if you’re straight,” she explained, smiling. Dean glanced at her with gratitude, then looked at Gabriel. 

What harm could it really do if he actually told him he was bi? It wasn’t a secret, really. Dean just wasn’t used to going around and announcing it to other people. There was also a tiny, little problem with Gabe being Cas’s brother, but Dean figured Cas would learn about his sexuality sooner rather than later. If Gabriel decided to just share this piece of information with Castiel, Dean might actually benefit from it.

“You don’t need to say if it makes you uncomfortable,” Gabriel interrupted his train of thought, looking a little bit troubled.

“No, uh…” Dean started, but his voice came out a little gruff. He cleared his throat before continuing. “It’s okay. It’s just still new to me to talk about it. I only recently came out to my family,” he said carefully. “I’m bi,” he finally admitted, looking at the tea leaves dancing in his mug. 

“Congrats, man! And hey, kudos for courage,” Gabe said, patting him on the shoulder. Dean felt a blush creeping on his neck. 

“Thanks,” he grunted in response. It was refreshing to say that out loud, he thought when Gabriel and Charlie dove into yet another subject. 

Some time later, Charlie and Dorothy decided to go home and since Castiel didn’t join them at the end, Gabe declared to go back to his hotel soon after. Dean suspected Cas had probably accidentally fallen asleep while reading a bedtime story to Jack again.

“We’ll see each other at the party, I guess,” Dean said, shaking Gabe’s hand.

“It sure looks like it. Thanks for the company, Dean-o!” Gabriel said, then winked at him and stepped out of the apartment, closing the door behind him.

Dean sighed. The cat was out of the bag now. He had actually considered asking Gabriel about Cas’s interests too, but he suspected it would be rude to find out like that. He should probably start gathering the courage to bite the bullet and ask Castiel himself.

He was just really afraid that his heart would break into a million pieces if it turned out that Castiel wasn't interested in him, after all.

Feelings were shit, man.

+

Cas observed as the sun slowly hid behind the buildings of the street in front of him. Sunsets in Porto were incredibly captivating, he thought. Portugal amazed him with many things, including the pleasant weather. He loved the warmth of the sun on his face, a sensation he had experienced almost every day they had spent here.

“Cas?” Eileen’s voice snapped him out of his thoughts. He looked at her, sitting in front of him with a worried expression. She must have said something he didn’t register.

“I’m sorry,” he said, smiling gently. “I've been experiencing some trouble focusing my attention these days.”

She smirked at him with a knowing look on her face. “You are just focusing on other things. Like Dean’s ass, for example,” she chuckled.

Cas felt his cheeks getting a little bit hotter. He opened his mouth to respond, but Eileen shook her head and spoke before again he could say anything.

“I asked how you like Porto so far?”

Castiel smiled, glancing at a cup of coffee on the table in front of him. “It’s warm and pretty. I really like it here,” he said, signing to her simultaneously. “Sweden is cold in comparison, and I’m not really a fan of cold,” he chuckled.

“Man, you lasted a long time there, then,” she grinned. “And how do you feel as an almost forty-year-old?”

He wasn’t sure how he felt about that. He had spent the last years of his life feeling pretty satisfied and almost sure he didn’t really need anything else. 

The green eyes suddenly danced in his mind.

“Not really ready, if I’m completely honest with you,” Cas chuckled, sipping his coffee. “But I’m quite content with my decision to move here. I’ll happily spend my fortieth birthday with all of you,” he finished, leaning on his elbow.

“With Dean, you mean?” She asked, raising her eyebrow playfully.

Castiel grinned at her. “With all of you,” he repeated, “but yes, I’m excited to spend my birthday with Dean, too,” he added after a beat.

“Ha, I knew it,” she giggled. “You two would look so damn cute together!”

Cas sighed, then studied her face for a moment. “I hope you won’t give me away. I'm still not sure how to proceed from where we are now,” he finally said. 

He really didn’t know what to do, no matter how long he tried to come to any decision.

The problem with Dean was obviously not his personality. The few months Cas had known him had proven that Dean was a good, caring, and loving man. With his stunning smile, forest eyes, and miles of freckles, he also happened to be the most beautiful human being Castiel had met in his life. 

No, the real issue was definitely not his unwillingness to be with Dean. In fact, it was quite the opposite, since Cas was more interested than he would like to admit. He was actually very scared of how  exactly  willing he was.

There was, however, a reason why Castiel didn’t do relationships. He wasn’t opposed to the idea of hooking up with someone, but long-term commitments were off the table. Period. This self-imposed rule had helped him maintain peace in his life until now, and he had planned to keep it that way - before he had met Dean Winchester, that is. 

Dean’s arrival had changed pretty much everything.

Even though Cas was questioning his relationship policy, he couldn’t turn a blind eye to the fact that Dean seemed to have his own hesitations and doubts. Castiel suspected that Dean was new to the idea of being romantically involved with another man. Cas also knew that the possible consequences of starting something that Dean wasn’t exactly ready to deal with, could be catastrophic. 

Deep inside, he felt that if something happened between him and Dean Winchester, there would be no coming back from it - Cas would be simply lost. And he was so afraid of being lost, so afraid of falling, and so absolutely terrified that Dean wouldn’t be ready to catch him if it came to that.

Gabriel had repeatedly warned him that Castiel was consciously stepping into the middle of the frozen lake, not really sure if the ice would hold him. Everything was moving dangerously fast - Cas knew that. His brother knew that as well, and he was just trying to protect him from possible harm.

Eileen’s voice brought him back from the depths of his mind. “This conversation is only between us, Cas. I love Dean like a brother, but I also consider you my friend.”

Cas observed her for a moment. “Thank you,” he finally said, smiling a little. “Dean is really important to me,” he admitted, looking out the window. “But we've got so much going on already. Changing jobs, changing the place we live… I don't want to rush anything,” Castiel finished, then looked back at Eileen. 

“I get it,” she said. “But don't torture the guy for too long. He's a good man, you know?”

Castiel nodded, smiling a little wider. There was no doubt about that.

“Hey, whatever happens, just remember you have friends here, now,” Eileen said, putting her hand on his and smiling softly. She had known him for five minutes and Castiel could already tell she was treating him like a part of her family. Dean had been right, she really was incredible.

Suddenly, Eileen squeezed his hand hard, placing the other one on her belly and her face twisted in pain.

“What’s wrong?” Castiel asked, seriously spooked.

“Nghh…” she yelled, drawing the attention of other people in the coffee shop. Cas stood up, rounded the table, and knelt before Eileen, now white as a sheet.

“Cas,” she whispered, “it’s a contraction,” she said, taking deep breaths. Beads of sweat appeared on her forehead. Her eyes widened suddenly. “I think my water just broke,” she said. “It started. I’m giving birth.”

Chapter Text

When Dean entered the pub Benny had chosen for their meeting, it was already past 7 in the evening. He had tried to get there on time, but finding a parking space in the area had been almost impossible. It was Saturday evening, and it seemed like everyone in Porto, along with their mothers, wanted to have some fun. Dean just wanted to sit on his couch with Cas and Jack and watch more movies these days, but Benny needed him today. Without a second thought, Dean had thrown on his favorite flannel shirt and jeans and had driven to the city.

Castiel was going out with Eileen anyway, so it wasn't like they even could spend some time on the couch, watching movies. 

Actually, they hadn't even done that today, since Cas had insisted on working on the budget. He had been chasing Dean around the apartment almost all day, asking him various questions that Dean didn't really want to answer. It had been so bad that, at one point, Dean had even considered hiding in his bathroom. 

Dean nodded hello to the bartender and headed towards the back of the pub, looking for his friend. He thought that the place looked overly masculine as if someone decorating it had been afraid of adding nice stuff so they wouldn't be accused of being too soft. 

Finally, Dean spotted Benny sitting at a table against the wall, sipping an amber drink. There was a good chance it was whisky.

“Hey,” Dean said, patting Benny’s back.

“Dean,” Benny drawled, smirking, when Dean sat in front of his friend, observing his face. Benny looked like he had been drinking for a moment now. He also looked quite miserable.

“That bad, huh?” Dean asked him with a frown. They knew each other long enough for Dean to know that Benny was in pretty rough shape. “What happened, man?”

Benny didn’t reply right away. His blue eyes scanned Dean's face for a moment. He took a sip from his glass and sighed. “You knew what you were doin’, not gettin’ hitched young. Now look at you, you handsome devil! Damn, you can have whoever you want!” he said, slurring slightly.

Dean’s frown deepened. “Did you argue with Andrea again?” he slowly asked. In the past, Benny and Andrea, like probably almost every long-term couple, had been fighting. Usually, when their fights got more serious, Benny needed to unwind, and things would go back to normal pretty quickly. However, this time Benny looked way worse than he had after the usual fight with his wife.

Benny huffed. “Argue? Nah…” he said, taking a sip from his glass again. “You argue over simple stuff, brother. Dirty socks, garbage that you forgot to throw away. Your mother-in-law,” Benny chuckled and shook his head. “I’m gonna need more of that,” he said, glancing at his almost empty glass. “You want somethin’?”

“I’m gonna get us a drink, Benny. Stay here,” Dean said, standing up. He decided it would be better if he was the one who went to the bar. He didn’t want to drink alcohol tonight at all, and Benny clearly needed something lighter than straight Scotch.

When Dean came back to their table a few minutes later, Benny was scrolling through his phone mindlessly. He tried to look up at Dean and smirk, but he had trouble focusing his gaze.

“There you go, cowboy,” Dean said, putting a glass with a whisky-based drink in front of Benny. “Now tell me what’s really going on with you,” he said, sipping his cola.

Benny didn't respond right away. He bit his lips and shook his head a few times, then finally glanced back at Dean.

“I was so damn happy with the baby, y’know,” he said, then looked down at his hand. It started to shake gently. Dean nodded, waiting for his friend to continue. “So fuckin’ happy. I started buildin’ a crib.”

“Something’s wrong with the baby?” Dean asked, worried.

“Baby’s fine,” Benny grunted, taking a sip of his drink. He winced almost immediately. “The fuck is that?” he asked Dean, frustrated.

“Whisky with stuff. Now tell me what’s wrong,” Dean said, raising his eyebrow. He started to slowly lose his patience.

Benny huffed, then shook his head again, then finally met Dean’s gaze. “S’not mine,” he said, hiccuping slightly.

“What?” Dean asked, not sure if he had heard that right.

“Baby. S’not mine,” Benny repeated, observing Dean’s face. 

They stayed silent for a moment. Benny didn't move, studying the table in front of him, while Dean tried to pick his jaw up off the floor.

“How?” was all Dean could muster a few beats later.

Benny snorted, then looked at his hands again. “I don’t wanna be the person explainin’ the birds and the bees to you, cher,” he slurred lazily, then glanced at Dean again. “She cheated, chief. Simple as that.”

A thousand thoughts ran through Dean's head, but one of them stood out above the rest - Andrea and Benny loved each other very much. Everybody knew that. A situation in which one of them cheated on the other was quite hard to imagine.

Before Dean could formulate a coherent thought, Benny continued.

“She said she met ‘im in Porto, and they hooked up. That was before she took the pregnancy test,” he said with an unsteady voice, then downed his drink. He looked at the empty glass, offended. “Hey! Another one!” He yelled at the bartender.

“Benny, slow down. Are you sure that the baby’s not yours? I mean, maybe she’s just pissed at you, and she told you all that crap to upset you or something?” Dean reasoned.

Benny frowned. He tried to look Dean in the eyes again, but he had a hard time keeping his gaze in one line. “And why’d she do that, cher?”

“Like I’d know,” Dean said evenly. “Did you two fight lately? Did you piss her off with something?”

Benny’s frown deepened. “Who knows? I don’t wanna talk about this woman anymore,” he stated, observing the bartender putting a new drink on the table before him. “That’s why I’m tellin’ you you’re the smart one,” he said, pointing at Dean with a smirk. “No wife to worry about, eh?” He said, then took a sip of his new drink.

Dean rolled his eyes at him, slightly annoyed. 

Benny did that sometimes, turning the attention away from himself and onto others, especially when he was hurt and angry. Dean knew, however, that Benny needed a friend right now, someone he could vent to. The problem was undoubtedly serious, but Dean believed once sober, Benny would properly talk to his wife and try to work things out with her.

“Y’know, cher,” Benny started again, observing Dean’s face. “You’ve got some balls there, I’m telling ya,” he said, his speech growing even more drawn out. 

“What?” Dean asked, not sure what Benny was even talking about.

“You’re brave, brother,” his friend said.

Dean huffed. “Yeah, well, I don’t know anything about that,” he said, thinking about his recent struggles with his feelings.

Benny shook his head, chuckling. “Oh yeah, you do. You told us you swing both ways, chief. That’s somethin’ you gotta have balls to admit,” he smirked, swirling the rest of a drink in his glass.

Dean raised an eyebrow, a bit surprised by the turn in the conversation. “Yeah? And how’s that?” He asked, watching his friend's face carefully. Benny was looking at him a little differently now, giving Dean a really strange feeling in his stomach.

"It must’ve been hard to tell us. But you know, you already attract all the pretty chicks, and now you’re gonna do the same with guys. I guess it’s nice to have so many choices," Benny mumbled, his gaze dropping to Dean’s lips for a second. "Ever been with a guy, Dean?" He asked, leaning a little bit closer. His eyes almost bore a hole into Dean's from the sheer intensity of his stare.

Oh shit, thought Dean. He’s hitting on me.

Dean's mind raced, desperately searching for a way out of this conversation. Benny was handsome, sure, but there was absolutely no space in Dean’s head or his heart for  that , whatever it was. His friend had a marriage problem and Dean was here to fucking help, not make everything even worse. 

He cleared his throat and pulled away slightly. "Benny, man, I appreciate the sentiment, but I ain’t gonna talk with you about dicks now,” he finally said, chuckling. "What I'm gonna do is get you home safely, Cinderella. You’re totally plastered. Come on, move your ass," he ordered, standing up and ignoring his friend’s protests.

As Dean managed to finally get Benny out of the pub, they started slowly moving towards the Mustang. It was already dark outside and the street lamps were on. His friend was very unsteady on his feet, so he leaned heavily on Dean’s side. Benny wasn't a small man by any means, and Dean decided he really should go to the gym more often.

“You smell nice, cher,” Benny slurred when they managed to pass one building.

“Yeah? And you’re fucking heavy. How does Andrea even do it when she has to carry your ass home all by herself is beyond me,” Dean said, almost out of breath. 

Suddenly, Dean’s phone started to ring in his pocket. He reached for it with his free hand and picked up the call. 

“Yeah?” He grunted, trying to catch Benny, who stumbled. His friend looked a little green now.

“Dean?” he heard Cas’s deep, panicked voice.

“What’s wrong?” Dean asked, almost forgetting about Benny, now plastered to his shoulder. 

“Eileen’s in labor. I drove her to the hospital. Sam’s on his way,” Cas said quickly. 

“She’s…” Dean started, but Benny chose this exact moment to lurch forward and start vomiting on the pavement. “Oh my fucking God,” Dean said, trying to support Benny so he wouldn’t fall. 

“Sorry, cher,” Benny slurred, straightening.

“Don’t worry about it now,” Dean said, wiping vomit from his sleeve.

“What’s going on?” Cas asked, alarmed.

“I uh… I’ll explain later, Cas. Can you text me which hospital you went to? I’ll be there as soon as possible.”

“Alright, Dean. See you soon,” Cas said and disconnected the call. 

Dean put his phone away and glanced at Benny again.

“Let's just get you home, man," Dean said and patted his friend on the back. 

+

The smell of detergent hung heavy in the air as Dean walked through the hospital corridors. Luckily, he didn't have to look for his family for long. First, he spotted the gigantic frame of his brother, then Cas’s tousled hair. Everyone was gathered outside the delivery room, which could mean only that Eileen was still in labor. 

As if on cue, Castiel turned his head and looked at Dean with a serious expression. Mary was sitting in his arms, while Jack sat on the chair nearby.

“Hey, what did I miss?” Dean asked, glancing between Sam and Cas.

“You smell of puke,” DJ stated from the level of his knees.

“Yeah, squid, luckily not mine,” Dean said to him, then looked back up. Castiel tilted his head and narrowed his eyes at him. “It’s a long story. How’s Eileen?” Dean asked, frowning.

“We don’t know yet. We’re waiting for a doctor. Sam wants to go in,” Castiel explained while Sam nodded. Dean noticed his brother was slightly panicking. 

“Hey, Sammy?” Dean said, sending him a reassuring smile. “She’s the toughest girl I know. Everything’s gonna be okay,” he said, patting Sam on his shoulder.

Suddenly, a woman in white came out of the glass door and stopped in front of them. “Mister Winchester?” She asked in an accented voice.

“Yeah?” Dean and Sam said simultaneously. The nurse looked at them strangely. “The husband of Eileen Leahy-Winchester?” She asked again, glancing between the brothers.

“That’s me,” Sam said, stepping forward.

“You can come with me now. Your wife wants you to be there with her,” she said, then led Sammy through the glass door without another word. Dean watched for a moment as they moved away, then glanced at Cas again. Mary definitely chose him as her pillow because she seemed to fall asleep in his arms. Castiel nodded towards the chairs, then started walking in this direction. Dean followed after him. 

“Man, what an evening,” Dean said when both of them had sat down. “It’s so good you were with Eileen when it started, Cas. Thank you for taking care of her.”

Castiel smiled at him, then looked at sleeping Mary. “Of course,” he said quietly. He looked freaking adorable with a baby in his arms. “I guess we’re on kid’s duty now,” Cas chuckled, glancing at DJ and Jack who were watching something on Jack’s phone two chairs over. 

“Yeah, it's good we don’t have to go to the office tomorrow, man,” Dean said, then looked around. “Hey, you want some coffee? There should be a coffee machine somewhere.”

Cas nodded, so Dean left him with the kids and set off to find hot drinks. He located them in another corridor, right next to the snack machine. Deciding to treat the kids, he also bought a package of breadsticks and returned to his family with two steaming cups in his hands.

“When did you get here?” He asked Cas, passing him one cup.

“About an hour ago, the nurses said that she was 7 centimeters dilated already, and she had strong contractions when they took her to the delivery room,” Cas murmured, then sipped his coffee, careful not to disturb the sleeping girl. Dean sniffed the contents of his cup, then took a sip as well, but winced almost immediately. “Christ, this is disgusting,” he muttered, then called Jack and tossed him the breadsticks to share with DJ. “If it doesn’t end in the next 20 minutes, we’re gonna take the kids to my place and put them to sleep,” he said to Cas, who nodded.

They sat in silence for a moment, sipping their coffees. 

What a fucking day, Dean thought.

Benny had actually flirted with him. It was bizarre and unexpected, and though quite flattering, Dean had no idea what to do next. Should he talk to Benny at work? Would Benny even remember what he had done? Dean had obviously no intention of acting on Benny’s interest - he wasn't and didn't want to become a homewrecker, under any circumstances. Besides, his heart was already occupied by the blue-eyed dork, sitting beside him and observing Dean intently.

“So, why do you smell of puke, Dean?” Cas asked.

“Because Benny vomited right in front of me, Cas,” Dean said amused, raising his eyebrow at his grinning friend.

“That’s lovely,” Cas stated, tilting his head.

“Right?” Dean chuckled. “He's got some family problems. I've never seen him like that,” he added. “Y’know, Eileen's due date wasn't until next week,” he said after a beat, leaning his head against the wall behind them.

“It happens, Dean.”

“Yeah, yeah.”

“Is Benny alright?” Cas asked a moment later.

Dean looked at the ceiling, thinking. “I don’t know. He was pretty wasted when I got there. I’ll call him tomorrow, make sure he’s okay,” he finally said. He had left his friend at his house with a rather concerned Andrea, who had stated that she’d had no idea where he had gone. Dean really hoped they could sort this all out between them.

“I see,” Cas murmured. “And are you okay?” He asked again, this time quieter.

Dean looked at him and sighed. He realized that by now, Cas's intense gaze had become a source of comfort for him. It was nice and familiar, and it eased Dean’s mind, calming him down. “Yeah, Cas. Now I am,” he said, smiling a little.

“Eileen Leahy-Winchester’s family?” 

Dean looked at the door, where now stood the nurse from before. “That’s us,” he said, standing up.

“You can go in,” she said, smiling softly. Dean nodded, then took DJ’s hand and put his other hand on Jack’s shoulder, following the lady. Cas walked behind him with Mary, still sleeping in his arms.

They moved through the too-bright corridor until the nurse showed them to the room on the left. From inside, they could already hear the cooing of newborns and the soft, hushed voices of attending adults. Once inside, Dean saw a tired, but smiling Eileen with a moving bundle in her arms. Sammy was sitting beside her with slightly red eyes. What a sap.

When they moved closer to her bed, Sammy stood up and took Mary in his arms from Cas while Dean approached Eileen. DJ padded to his mom, curiously glancing at the baby.

“Hey, sister. How are you feeling?” Dean asked, kissing Eileen's forehead and looking at the bundle in her arms. A newborn looked red and not really happy they had to leave their mommy’s belly.

“Tired,” Eileen slurred a little. They'd had to give her some fun stuff because her gaze was slightly dilating.

“Oh man, you’re high,” Dean chuckled, but before he could straighten back up, Eileen squeezed his hand.

“Listen to me, Dean Winchester,” she said, undoubtedly aiming for sharpness, but missing it by a mile. “If you don’t marry this man, I’m gonna kick your ass,” she said pointing at Cas. “I mean it,” she added, raising her eyebrows. Dean smirked, then glanced at Castiel, who was frowning behind him. Maybe it was just Dean's imagination, but he could swear he noticed the redness on Cas’s cheeks. Dean’s grin widened, then he turned back to Eileen. 

“What exactly did they give you here?” He asked, raising his eyebrow at her.

“That’s not important now,” she muttered. “Dean, this man is absolutely a keeper. He practically carried me here in his arms. You’d better go find a ring and drop to one knee,” she whispered so that only Dean could hear her. He nodded, trying to keep a straight face.

“Yeah, okay. Let’s get back to that uh… later,” he said, then looked at the baby again. “Can I finally meet the new Winchester?”

Eileen’s face immediately softened. “Of course,” she said, smiling. “This is Lincoln. She weighs 8 pounds 10 ounces and she’s perfectly healthy,” she added, passing the little girl to Dean.

“Lincoln?” Asked Cas, baffled. 

“Yeah,” Sammy chuckled. “As in the Lincoln Continental. My wife's sense of humor never ceases to amaze me”, he said, looking over Dean’s shoulder at his newborn daughter.

“We couldn't have made it on time without Cas and his car. He drove us here, Sam. Besides, you named the first two kids, so don’t even start,” Eileen said, leaning against her pillow, clearly exhausted. 

Dean chuckled, rocking the newborn in his arms. “Hello, Lin,” he said quietly to the tiny girl. “Welcome to the family.”

+

Dean woke up to a gentle knock on his bedroom door. He muttered a curse into the pillow, not wanting to open his eyes yet. Perhaps, if he ignored it, the irritating noise would stop.

“Dean?” he heard a moment later through the slightly cracked door. Dean opened one eye and muttered another curse into his pillow.

“I brought you coffee,” Cas said, smiling gently. He carefully balanced two mugs as he approached Dean’s bed. Dean seriously considered pulling him under the covers. Snuggling while surrounded by the stormy scent sounded pretty wonderful.

“What time is it?” He asked gruffly instead, refusing to move just yet.

“7:00 AM. It’s my and Jack’s first day, I don’t want us to be late,” Castiel said, putting Dean’s mug on his bedside table. “It’s also the first time I managed to wake up before you and bring you coffee,” he added, sitting on the verge of Dean’s bed. He looked adorably proud of himself. 

Dean chuckled. “Gee, look at you! Thanks, man, I appreciate it,” he said, slowly sitting up. When he stretched his hands above his head and his shirt went up, he noticed that Cas was observing him intently.

Interesting, Dean thought. Maybe he should have pulled Castiel under the covers with him? Maybe it was time to make a move? There was no point in waiting until tomorrow, what difference could one day make, after all?

Fuck it. Being bold was always Dean's best game, anyway.

“Seeing something you like, Cas?” Dean asked grinning, then winked playfully.

Cas's eyes widened slightly and his lips parted. He looked a little bit surprised like he didn’t expect Dean’s forwardness, but there was no trace of discomfort in his gaze. He looked almost intrigued as if Dean's boldness had ignited a spark of curiosity in him.

Before Dean had any time to even consider what to do next, Cas’s phone started ringing in his pocket, startling them both.

“It’s Jimmy,” Castiel said, looking at the screen. “I’m sorry, I should take this,” he said, standing up.

“Yeah, sure,” Dean muttered, trying to suppress a twinge of disappointment. Cas nodded with a small apologetic smile, and left the room, picking up the phone. Dean tracked his movement until he could see Cas no more, then sat on the edge of his bed and ran a hand through his hair. 

Yeah, no. Cas had just checked him out, and Dean hadn't imagined it. It was promising, at least, and as far as Dean cared, Meg could go to hell. He smiled, then reached for his coffee and took a sip.

Okay, so he could definitely try flirting some more, just to test the waters. He had always been good at flirting with girls, so it shouldn’t be much different when it came to Castiel, right? 

Dean frowned. His usually rich store of ideas seemed remarkably empty. 

It turned out Dean couldn’t come up with anything smart until Cas returned to the room.

“I’m sorry, Dean. Jimmy came to Porto earlier than planned. I’m going to see him during the lunch break,” Castiel said, entering the room. He walked to the bed and sat beside Dean with his coffee.

“No problem, man. Is his family with him?” Dean asked, slowly sipping his own drink.

“No, Claire and Amelia stayed at home,” Cas said with a little smile. “Perhaps I could convince them to come next time.” He tilted his head. “I actually think you’d get along with Claire.”

“The niece who gave you the cowboy hat?” Dean asked, smirking. “Yeah, we’ll get along.”

Cas observed him for a moment with a glint in his eyes, then glanced at his watch. “I’m afraid I need to wake Jack up in a moment. It’s getting late,” he said.

“Sure thing. I’ll start breakfast,” Dean said, then lifted a mug in his hand. “And thanks for the coffee again.”

“Of course, Dean,” Cas replied with a warm smile.

+

Around 11 AM Dean entered the office building of Singer & Winchesters. Thanks to Castiel’s presence, his brother had finally stopped demanding that he wear suits every day, so Dean had decided to put on his second favorite flannel shirt – the first one still had some puke on it.

Benny had called in sick this morning and hadn’t responded to any of Dean’s texts. Dean was worried, but he also felt a bit relieved - he still had no idea how to talk to Benny about the whole pub situation.

“Oh, hey Dean!” Donna called when she saw him by the door. “How are ya?” She asked with a smile.

“Good, thanks,” Dean answered, stopping at the security desk. “I’m actually really happy I don’t need to show up here every day anymore. Not that I’m not thrilled to see you girls,” he added, winking. “Is Cas in the office?”

“You betcha! He came about twenty minutes ago. He looks like a Greek god, this one! He turns a lot of eyes towards himself,” Donna said in a hushed tone. “Tell me, did he really win the America’s Cup?”

Dean smirked, then nodded. “Yeah, he did. According to Sam, Castiel is a sailing superstar.”

“We are lucky he works with us now, then,” she said smiling. “Oh, and how’s Eileen and the baby girl?”

“They’re well. Eileen and Lin are going back home today. Sammy’s going to stay with them for a week. Wait, let me show you the baby,” Dean said, then pulled out his phone and started scrolling through his gallery.

“Oohh, what a sweet little pumpkin,” Donna cooed at the photo of Lincoln in Sammy’s arms.

“She really is sweet,” Dean admitted, smiling at the picture. So far, the little girl had barely cried at all, allowing Eileen to sleep through the nights.

“She's lovely, like all their babies! Can't wait until you have your own! They're going to be so pretty,” Donna chuckled.

Dean winced a little. Would he even want to be a dad? Would Cas want to raise another child with him? Undoubtedly, Donna had meant Dean knocking out some girlfriend or wife, but if everything went according to his plan, that particular scenario would be off the table.

“Yeah, I don't know,” he chuckled awkwardly, then glanced at his watch. “Okay, gotta go, Cas wanted to see me. Have a nice shift, Donna,” he said, waving to the guard and approaching the elevator.

When the door closed, Dean finally registered what Donna had said about Cas’s arrival. It didn’t make any sense, given that his friend should have been in his new office since morning, and if Dean wasn’t mistaken, around 9 AM should have still been Jody’s shift. He scratched his head, then pushed the button one floor below his and waited patiently as the elevator ascended, deciding to just let it go for now.

The doors opened, revealing the ugly, office carpet. Dean stepped out, then directed his steps to the left, whistling ‘Black Dog’ to himself. Cas’s office was placed directly under his, so the walk wasn’t long. When he approached the door, he knocked and pushed the handle, entering the room. By the desk stood Cas, talking to someone on the phone.

“He’s somewhere in the building,” he said, his voice a little too high. He glanced at Dean, surprised. “I’m not sure. Listen, I’ve got to go. I’ll call you later. I love you too,” he said quietly, then put the phone down. “Can I help you?” He asked Dean calmly, like he didn’t just confess his love to someone at the other end of the call.

“I uh…” Dean started, feeling his heart bleeding on the carpet below his feet. “I didn’t know you were on the phone, I can come back later,” he said weakly. Castiel looked unfazed. Dean suddenly realized he was wearing different clothes than he had in the morning. “Why did you change?” Dean asked dumbly like it was the most important thing that didn’t add up here. 

Cas frowned, looking unsure what Dean was talking about. “I’m sorry?” He asked, furrowing his brow. 

Before Dean could react, the door to the office opened and another Castiel came into the room. Dean’s jaw dropped.

“Hello, Dean,” the second Castiel said in a stupidly deep voice, tilting his head. He was holding a stack of papers in his hand.

“Why are there two of you?” Dean asked both Cas's, very confused.

“Oh,” Castiel number one said. “Now I understand why you’re so surprised. We’re twins,” he explained, smiling at Dean.

Castiel at the door chuckled. "Dean, this is my brother, Jimmy Novak," he said, gesturing towards his doppelganger with a nod as he closed the door to his office. "Jimmy, meet Dean Winchester," he continued, standing beside Dean.

“Shit, there really are two of you,” Dean muttered, extending his hand in a greeting for Jimmy to shake it. “Why didn’t you tell me you've got a twin, man?”

“It didn’t come up,” Cas said, raising his eyebrow. “But I understand why this situation could be confusing,” he added, smirking.

Dean observed his face for a moment, then turned to Jimmy. “Hey, did you by any chance enter the office about 30 minutes ago?” 

“Yes, I was a little surprised nobody stopped me,” Jimmy said, looking unsure.

Dean grinned, then looked at the real Cas again. When he focused on the details, he could differentiate between both brothers. Castiel’s eyes were definitely bluer, and his hair more ruffled. He was also watching Dean closely, and his gaze was much softer on the edges, almost like he was observing something dear to him. Dean felt his insides getting a little bit hotter. Jimmy cleared his throat, catching Dean's attention again.

“Yeah, Donna thought you were Cas. You could easily rob this place if you wanted, man,” Dean chuckled.

Castiel turned to his brother. “I need about thirty minutes. Will you be alright here?”

When Jimmy nodded, Cas opened the door again and Dean followed him outside, waving a goodbye to Castiel’s brother.

“Shit, Cas, a twin?” He asked while they moved to the elevator. 

“Yes. I can see it’s a bit of a shock to you, Dean,” Cas said with a small grin. “I didn’t realize my brother’s looks would be of any import.”

“C’mon, you can’t be fucking serious,” Dean whined. “This is wild, two Cas’s,” he added quietly after a beat. Cas chuckled beside him.

When they arrived at Dean’s office, Dean shut the door while Cas pulled out the papers he was holding and placed them on the coffee table. "Sit," he said. Dean obeyed, feeling a little hot around the collar. "As you know, I checked your budget." Dean made a face, but Castiel didn’t stop talking. "I have also reviewed and updated the proposal for changing suppliers of sailboat parts."

"When did you do all this, dude?" Dean muttered, but Cas didn’t pay any attention to his words.

"It seems there are a few quite reasonable options to save money without compromising quality. You mainly use the same suppliers you worked with when the company was based in the United States. I found some replacements from Europe instead, that offer similar products at lower prices," he continued, pointing at the documents.

Dean frowned. "How do you know the quality is similar? I don't like experimenting with new things if I know the old ones work well. They're safe."

Cas’s smirk widened. "I read the technical data sheets, and I tested some of the products myself while sailing. I know those companies, Dean. You’re stubborn for no real reason." A mischievous glint danced in Cas’s eyes. "Sometimes it’s good for us to experiment with new things. It may bring quite satisfactory results," he said, his voice even deeper.

Dean’s hands started to sweat. He was almost sure they were no longer talking about boats. "If you put it that way," he said weakly, letting his gaze drop to Castiel’s lips.

Cas tilted his head a little. "Great. I will make corrections to your budget; it should be ready at your desk by Friday."

Dean didn’t register anything besides 'ready at his desk,' so he nodded, positive that he was very ready for whatever could happen on his desk.

Cas observed him composedly with his arms crossed. "Dean," he finally said, raising his eyebrow and tilting his head.

"Yeah?"

"Why didn’t you check the emails you got from Miss Johnson?"

Dean frowned again. "Who?" he asked, not sure why he wasn’t bent over his desk yet.

"The lady who told you to revise your budget for yacht construction," Cas explained calmly. “She sent you an email a few weeks ago.”

Dean’s frown deepened, but he finally remembered ‘call me Shaylene’ Miss Johnson.

"Oh, her. She’s scary," Dean admitted, making Cas snort. "Besides, she told me to lower my standards, and I ain’t gonna do that," Dean continued.

"I see. In that case, I understand your motivation. It's not worth lowering standards for just anyone," Cas said evenly. Dean nodded, observing Cas’s lips again.

Castiel sighed, then looked out Dean’s window, slowly shaking his head. "I’m afraid I need to get back to Jimmy. We’re supposed to eat lunch together," he said, looking back at Dean. "Do you want to go with us?" He added after a pause, causing Dean to return to reality.

Dean grimaced a little, then glanced at his watch. “I can’t. Benny’s absent today, so I need to get back to the hangar.” He’d really like to spend some more time with Cas and his twin, even if only to get used to the idea of two Cas’s existing in one space. “But we could eat dinner together,” he added, standing up. “I guess Gabe can come too since he’s gonna do it anyway.”

Cas’s face turned apologetic. “Dean, I’d love to go, but I must refuse this time. We planned a meeting to discuss quite important family matters.”

“Oh, yeah, sure, I get it,” Dean said, fighting with the feeling of disappointment. “Raincheck, then?”

Cas smiled at him, making Dean momentarily forget he had been bummed just a second ago. “Of course,” Castiel said.

+

“Who’s the prettiest baby girl in the town?” Dean cooed at little Lin wrapped in a blanket in his arms. When she started to stir a little, Dean stood up from Sammy’s couch and began walking around the room, rocking the baby gently. “Let me sing you some real music, Lin,” he added, then proceeded to sing ‘Highway to Hell’ in a hushed tone.

“Really, Dean? She’s like a day and a half old,” Sam said, entering the room with DJ and Mary following closely behind. He held two bowls with chopped apples and carrots, undoubtedly for the kids.

“What? You gotta start your education somewhere, Sammy,” Dean said, a little offended. Sam rolled his eyes at him, then put the bowls on the table. “How are you holding up?” Dean asked when his brother sat heavily on the couch. 

“We’re both tired, but the kids are great,” Sammy said, observing as DJ devoured the apples. “There will be a babysitter next week to help Eileen with everything,” he added. “How’s the company holding up?”

“Still standing, Sam. Stop worrying about it now; me and Cas will take care of everything. Focus on your wife and kids,” Dean said quietly, trying not to wake Lin up. It looked like she had finally fallen asleep in his arms. He slowly walked to the crib standing by the wall, but just when he leaned to put her into her bed, Lin stirred with a dissatisfied frown on her tiny face. Dean straightened back up and started walking around the room again.

“Yeah, okay,” Sam huffed. “I can see that you’re in much better shape now when he came back from Sweden,” he said carefully. Dean glanced at him, then back at the baby sleeping in his arms. He and Sam hadn’t really talked about Dean’s feelings since the conference room fiasco, and when Cas and Jack had come to Porto again, Dean had kinda forgotten about their conversation altogether.

Once Dean finally managed to put Lin into the crib without her waking up, he turned his gaze to his brother. “I guess I am,” he said, moving to the chair. “Listen, Sam, I’m sorry I've been an ass to you lately. I want you to know you can count on me,” Dean added.

“I know. You can count on me, too,” Sam said quietly with a little smile. “And uh… Maybe I shouldn’t push you so much. Just remember I’m here if you ever want to talk.”

Dean nodded, examining the bowl with carrots on the table. Mary slowly munched an apple beside him. She was the spitting image of her mommy. 

“And uh… how was Cas's first day at work?” Sam asked after a moment. 

Dean chuckled. “I saw him around noon and he was on fire, man. Oh, and I've met Jimmy. Did you know that they're twins?” He asked, biting a carrot.

Sam huffed and nodded. “Yeah, Cas told me. Do they really look alike?”

“What do you mean that he told you? He didn't tell me…” Dean said, frowning. “Yeah, they're almost identical. Donna actually mistook Jimmy for Cas when he entered the office today.”

“Man, this is nuts. I can't imagine if you had a twin. One Dean is definitely enough,” Sam chuckled, then raised his eyebrows and nodded at his kids when Dean wanted to respond.

“This is playing dirty, Sammy,” Dean muttered, trying to stay as kid-friendly as possible. Sam gave him a stupid grin.

“Doesn’t it bother you that Cas and Jack are staying at your house?” his brother asked after a beat.

Dean smiled a little, then shook his head. “Nah. I like having them around. We get along really well.”

“Yeah, I can tell. It’s kinda surprising, actually. You couldn’t stand living with other people at college,” Sam said, raising his eyebrow. He was right; Dean liked his things organized and clean, which was hard to maintain when he shared his space with others. For some reason, neither Castiel nor Jack disrupted Dean’s meticulous sense of order.

“I know. I’m actually scared the apartment would feel empty when they move out on Wednesday,” Dean said. To be honest, he was more like seriously freaking out about it. He started to get really addicted to the homey atmosphere that came with Cas and Jack’s arrival. The three of them had spent almost every evening watching movies or listening to music and Dean hadn't felt this relaxed in years. “I wish they could just stay there, y’know?” He added.

“Dude, you can’t live with Cas all the time,” Sam said, frowning. “He's got his own thing going on, and you've got yours. Besides, what if you meet someone you want to invite for the night or something? It would be super awkward.”

The problem was that Dean had already met someone he wanted to invite for the night, or more like all the nights, but his brother obviously didn’t know that. He forced a smile, not particularly interested in explaining to Sam his motivation just yet. 

“I’m not going to,” Dean hesitated, glancing at Mary and DJ, “invite over some random people with Jack and Cas under my roof, Sam,” Dean finally said, making a face at his brother. “I’m not an animal.”

Sam smirked. “Don’t tell me you finally grew up, Dean.”

“Yeah, shut up,” Dean mumbled, biting into another carrot.

+

It was quite late when Jack and Cas finally returned to Dean’s place. Castiel was exhausted, his brother’s words still echoing in his head. Gabriel alone had already been problematic, and with Jimmy joining in, Cas had been almost outnumbered. Almost, because surprisingly, Jack had hopped in on the heated discussion about their move to Porto and persistently defended the Winchesters and their intentions. The boy was very attached to Dean, which probably should have scared Cas more than it did.

“Hey, how was your day, guys?” Dean asked from the couch with a warm smile. He looked soft and cozy, clad in a gray sweatshirt and socked feet. His hair was a little longer again, and he had a slight stubble. Cas felt a sudden urge to lie down next to him.

“I hate Uncle Jimmy,” Jack declared when he took off his shoes, then walked to the couch and hugged Dean’s side. Dean’s green eyes widened with surprise, but he embraced Jack and patted him on the back.

“I’m so sorry to hear it, bud,” he said, glancing at Castiel with a quizzical look. “What happened?”

“My brothers are still questioning my decision about us moving here. They’re giving us a hard time,” Castiel said with a strained smile, while he took off his jacket and put it on the chair.

Dean’s face instantly darkened, and he hugged Jack closer to himself. “Hey, Jackie? Let’s watch a movie together. You choose whatever you like, and I’ll prepare some snacks, okay?” He said gently. Cas’s heart melted a little. Jack nodded, so Dean patted him on the back again, then stood up, leaving the boy on the couch. Castiel followed Dean to the fridge.

“Are they nuts? He’s just a kid, and it was his first day at school,” Dean then muttered quietly, so only Cas could hear him.

Castiel sighed, closing his eyes. It was truly nerve-wracking to fight with his family like that. He almost forgot the time he'd had to do it on an almost daily basis. When his father had discovered he wasn’t straight, they had been fighting constantly until the day Castiel had moved away.

Even knowing that Gabriel and Jimmy had his best interests in mind, they had been quite annoying. This wasn't the first time they had tried to convince him that Castiel was making decisions too hastily or that Dean was just trying to use him. The worst part of their nagging was that they had planted a seed of doubt deep in Castiel’s mind, and he started to feel even more scared than before. It was bizarre since Cas was never really the type to turn his back, tuck his tail, and run away - that was never really his style. Dean’s arrival, however, made everything more difficult, since Castiel couldn’t exactly command himself to stop having feelings for the man. He had a really hard time saying ‘no’ to Dean, hence his judgment was more than a little clouded. Even so, his mind urged him to be careful, for Jack’s sake at least, which turned out to be only harder with each passing day.

“Okay, we’ve got chips, popcorn, and cocoa. I think we’re set,” Dean said, then walked to the coffee table, balancing three mugs and a bowl in his hands. “How was school, bud?” He asked when he sat beside Jack. Cas followed him with another bowl, sitting at Dean's other side.

“Not bad. My classmates are okay, I guess. But I still don’t like Miss Hannah,” Jack said, narrowing his eyes at Castiel. Dean followed Jack’s line of sight and cocked his brow playfully. He was so close that Castiel could count all of the freckles on his nose.

“Give her some time, Jack, that’s all I ask for,” Cas responded, looking away from Dean with difficulty. “You didn’t like Miss Naomi, too, remember?”

“Yes, and it never changed. She was mean and shouted,” Jack grumbled.

Dean chuckled, then wrapped his arm around the boy. “Okay, bud. Leave your Dad alone. Did you pick something?”

Once the movie started and Jack focused fully on the screen, Castiel discreetly glanced at Dean beside him. Up close, he could sense his characteristic scent of freshly cut wood and timber. There was a tint of leader and some kind of spice in it, too, that Cas couldn’t exactly pinpoint. It carried the essence of a freshly crafted wooden boat, slowly sculpted into the most beautiful shape.

Cas barely registered the movie Jack had chosen before the tiredness overcame him and his eyelids grew heavy. He could feel the inviting warmth emanating from Dean's body right through the layers of their clothing. The exhausting day made him vulnerable, weak and desperately aching for comfort. 

It didn’t take long until he finally gave in, leaning against Dean and resting his head on his shoulder. Without saying a word, Dean adjusted slightly and put his other arm around Cas, making sure he was comfortable. Castiel couldn’t muster any strength to panic, feeling warm and peaceful and so, so safe. He could now hear the steady rhythm of Dean's breathing.

The last thing Cas remembered before lulling into a peaceful slumber was that even if there was a chance it would all go to shit, Dean was worth trying, anyway.

+

When Dean started to slowly wake up, he felt a warm, comforting weight tucked in his arms and the stormy scent lingering all around him. He smiled and hugged sleeping soundly Cas closer to his chest, deciding to keep his eyes closed as long as possible. He had no idea how they had ended up in this position, but Dean sure as hell wasn't complaining.

Everything else could wait, he thought, relaxing his muscles and soaking in the feeling of Castiel in his embrace. 

He must've drifted back to sleep because Cas’s stir woke him up a while later. When Dean finally opened one eye, he was greeted by Cas’s sleepy gaze from the level of his chest. His normally messy hair was adorably sticking in every direction. He blinked a few times, then propped on his elbows and looked around, like he didn’t quite understand why they'd been cuddling a moment ago. Dean started to slightly panic that he had somehow overstepped, but when Cas’s eyes landed on Dean’s again, he smiled softly and sank back at Dean’s chest.

“Good morning, Dean,” he rumbled. Dean felt his deep voice vibrating through his ribcage.

“Hey,” Dean replied quietly, smiling softly. “Happy birthday.”

“Thank you,” Cas said, then closed his eyes. “You're extremely comfortable to sleep on,” he added.

Dean's smile widened. “I'm here to serve, Cas.”

Cas made a sound Dean could only describe as purr. Dean seriously considered staying on that couch for the rest of the day.

“Where is Jack?” Castiel asked after a moment, his voice a little raspy.

“I’m not sure,” Dean responded, then tilted his head to the side to check the rest of the couch. It was empty. “He’s not here. Maybe he went to bed yesterday? You know, like a normal person?”

Cas snorted, then opened his eyes and glanced at Dean. “What time is it?” He asked. 

“I don’t know, I haven't moved yet,” Dean said, then looked at his watch. “Oh fuck,” he muttered. They were already late. 

Castiel frowned and looked at his own watch. “Shit,” he said quietly, then sat up, pulling away from Dean. “Can you make us coffee? I’ll go and wake up Jack,” he said, standing up.

10 minutes later, all three of them were sitting by the table, biting into hastily prepared sandwiches. Jack looked suspiciously happy, glancing between Dean and Cas. 

“You really went to sleep alone?” Cas asked for the third time while trying not to get burned by his too-warm coffee. 

“Uh-huh,” Jack nodded.

“And you didn’t wake me up?”

Jack shook his head.

“Weren’t you scared?” Cas raised his eyebrow. 

“Nope,” the boy said, grinning, then glanced at Dean, who winked discreetly. Cas narrowed his eyes at him, but Dean pretended to be oblivious.

Cas sighed, then stood up and put his jacket on. “Okay, we have to go. We’re late. Did you take everything with you for a sleepover, Jack?” Cas asked. The plan was to leave the boy with Eileen and the kids for a night and pick him up in the morning, after the birthday party. When Jack nodded and walked to his backpack, Cas turned to Dean, smiling a little. “We’ll see each other at the club?”

“Yeah,” Dean said, but before Cas turned to the door, Dean reached out and grasped his hand, intertwining their fingers. Cas stopped his movements and looked at their joined hands. He was surprised but didn’t pull away. When he looked up again, his smile was a little wider.

“I’ll be there as soon as I finish with the rigging today,” Dean said. “Have a nice day, guys,” he added, then gently squeezed Cas’s hand before letting go.

+

Dean was late - he had left the hangar way past 5 PM and had wanted to take a shower and change before coming to the party. Benny hadn’t shown up at work today as well, so Dean had to pick up the slack. He still wasn't responding to Dean's texts, but Dean hadn't had time to address that particular problem yet.

The air was buzzing with anticipation when he finally stepped into the club. Charlie had reserved a section near the dance floor for the entire night, adorned with double sofas and small tables. It was now decorated with blue balloons and a large, golden ‘Happy birthday’ sign above the sofa, where Cas was sitting with some dude, surrounded by other people Dean didn’t know. The place was pretty crowded (it was quite a popular club in Porto, after all), and it seemed every guest had already arrived. Probably half of them - including Gabe, telling a dirty joke two tables away - were drunk.

Dean squeezed through the people standing in his way, waving to Charlie and Dorothy. He saw Sam talking with Meg, Jimmy, and some tall dude, but he didn’t stop to greet them. He wanted to get to Cas and give him his present, tucked safely in his pocket.

“Dean Winchester, what a coincidence,” he suddenly heard to his right. When he turned his head, he saw Lisa in a pretty, short dress accompanied by two other ladies. “I always liked this shirt. It looks really good on you,” she said, smiling sweetly.

“Oh, hey,” Dean said, then looked down at his chest. He had been nervous when he chose his clothes, so it was nice to hear that he didn't mess that up, at least. “Thanks. How are you?”

“You know, same old,” she replied while her friend giggled beside her. “How come you are here, in the middle of the work week?” She then asked, her eyes gleaming mischievously.

“My friend’s birthday,” Dean pointed at the golden sign with his thumb.

“I was wondering who's that blue-eyed cutie. Haven't seen him in here before,” Lisa's friend said, smirking in Cas’s direction.

Dean chuckled. “Yeah, you've gotta get in line, sister. Half of Porto thinks he's cute.”

“Maybe you’ll introduce me, then?” The lady asked, batting her eyelashes. She was starting to really get on Dean’s nerves. 

Lisa snorted. “You have to excuse Angela; she’s in her predatory phase. She just broke up with her boyfriend.” Angela wasn’t particularly happy with Lisa’s explanation, as she started talking rapidly in Portuguese, gesticulating vividly with her hands. Dean only understood the repeated several times' word 'bastard'.

He smiled politely. “Yeah, okay. Listen, I’m kind of late. I should go. You girls have a good night,” he said, but before he could move, Lisa put her hand on his forearm.

“It’s good to see you, Dean. If you ever feel like it, I wouldn’t say no to a drink. Don't be a stranger,” she said, smiling. 

“You too, Lis. See you,” Dean answered, returning the smile. Lisa nodded, turned around, and disappeared into the crowd, followed by her friends. Dean stood there for a moment, wondering what the chances were of meeting his ex in this particular pub, and on Cas’s birthday, no less.

Lisa was a very good, beautiful person, he thought, resuming his walk towards the golden sign. It didn't change the fact that he simply couldn't give her what she was looking for. She wanted a stable relationship with a responsible person, and Dean was just himself - not very smart, not really mature, and definitely not stable. Besides, his single cuddle session with Cas had been more profound than every date he had ever gone on with her, combined.

The fact that he hadn't succeeded in forming a healthy, romantic bond before bothered him a little. It wasn't that he didn't try, but something always came up, ending things before they could develop any further. Cas was different, though. Dean had somehow known this from the moment they met, a powerful feeling growing deep inside his ribcage. Like a moth drawn to a flame, Dean couldn't help but fly closer and closer, basking in the warmth.

He finally reached Cas’s sofa. His friend spotted him, and a sweet smile lit up his face. Dean couldn’t help but smile back at him. Castiel was wearing a black button-down shirt with his sleeves rolled up and Dean’s favorite, ass-hugging jeans. The guy sitting next to Cas greeted Dean with a polite nod. Dean noticed he was really handsome, with almost ebony skin and dark eyes.

Castiel stood up and hugged Dean awkwardly over the small table standing between the sofas. “You made it,” he said. 

“Of course I made it,” Dean said grinning, then pulled himself away. “Sorry I’m late. Busy day.”

Cas nodded, then shifted his attention to the guy on the sofa. "Dean, this is my dear friend, Benjamin."

Dean couldn't help but recall that name. He even harbored very specific suspicions about Benjamin's connection to Cas. Suppressing an unpleasant feeling of jealousy spreading over his chest, he offered a polite smile and extended his hand in greeting. Benjamin shook it firmly.

“Hey there,” Dean said, then turned his attention back to Cas. “How is the party going?” He asked as his friend settled back down. Dean took a seat on the opposite sofa.

“It's great. Charlie outdid herself,” Castiel said, looking around. “Even Jimmy hasn't complained yet. Thankfully, it's not too crazy,” Cas added after a beat.

Dean grinned at him. “Glad you like it, then. Have you danced yet?” He asked, hoping to experience this particular activity firsthand. To his disappointment, Benjamin spoke instead of Castiel.

“We have, actually. It’s a shame we don’t do this more often. Do you remember the party in Stockholm on your 35th birthday? I think we ended up in a different city, actually,” Benjamin said to Cas, making him snort. Dean felt an unpleasant pressure in his ribcage.

“I remember,” Cas replied, smiling at the memory. “I’m afraid I’m too old for that now,” he added, chuckling.

“Nonsense,” Benjamin said. “Like a fine wine, my friend,” he added, casually swirling his drink.

Dean decided to stop Benji’s pathetic attempts at shameless flirting. “I know a few nice places in Porto that actually teach you the steps. We could check it out. It could be fun.” 

Cas smiled and opened his mouth to respond, but before he had a chance, Benjamin interjected again. "So, you're the one who kidnapped Castiel, huh?" He asked, raising his eyebrow. There was something in his gaze that Dean really didn’t like, as if he was personally offended by Dean’s presence in his proximity.

Alrighty, then.

Dean mustered a strained smile. "I wouldn't exactly call it that," he chuckled awkwardly. 

“What would you call it, then?” Benjamin asked, observing Dean carefully. 

“I don’t know, man. Cas is an adult, he chose the better offer, so I guess I'd call it an opportunity,” Dean said with a smirk. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw a little smile forming on Cas’s lips.

Benjamin chuckled. “I can see that you believe that,” he said, then turned to Cas again. “You can always come back if the Portuguese sun would tire you.”

Dean rolled his eyes.

Cas glanced at Benjamin, smiling back. “I’ll remember that,” he said, then sent Dean an amused look. 

Dean wasn’t amused. He was actually starting to get very pissed. He ignored Cas, addressing Benjamin again. “So, what do you do for a living?”

“I’m a doctor,” Benji said, then sipped his drink. He looked damn pleased with himself, as if his incredible career could sweep Dean off his feet. It obviously didn’t, since Dean had already known what Benjamin’s job was, but the question seemed a polite way to push the small talk forward.

“And you're into the sailing business, I assume?” Benjamin asked, raising his eyebrow.

“You can say that,” Dean replied, feeling his frustration rising. “We sell boats, Benjamin. Big ones,” he added. “I wouldn't say that you're into needles and sick people business now, would I?”

Dean felt Cas kicking him in his calf under the table. He pretended he hadn’t felt a thing.

“No, I suppose you wouldn't. You have to forgive me, English is not my first language. I didn't want to offend you,” Benjamin said smoothly. His English was, obviously, perfect.

“We’ve actually met in the hospital when Jack was born,” Cas interjected politely, glancing at Benjamin again. Dean nodded, looking at the table before him. So, Cas had known this douchebag for quite a long time.

“Oh, how is Jack, by the way?” Benjamin asked.

“He’s well. He likes it here,” Cas replied. “He's quite excited to decorate his new room,” he added after a beat.

Dean felt a pang of sadness spreading over his chest. He had tried really hard to not think what would happen the next day, not exactly ready to see his apartment empty again. Cas, however, looked like he didn’t really care.

“That's great. I can't wait to see the boy. I've missed him,” Benjamin stated. “We can easily move your belongings tomorrow afternoon.”

Dean frowned at the guy. “What do you mean by we?” 

“Benjamin will be helping us with moving our things. He's going to stay at my place for a few days,” Cas explained.

Dean’s frown deepened. It wasn't that he didn't understand that Benjamin wanted to stick around. It was that Castiel actually seemed happy about it that rubbed Dean the wrong way.

“And what about this teacher you told me about over the phone?” Benjamin asked Cas a beat later.

“It’s… tough. I think he just needs more time,” Cas said. 

“Yes, I think he will get used to her, eventually. Jack has got quite an imagination,” Dr. Perfect said, making Dean’s insides turn.

And thus, Dean reached the end of his patience.

“Jack’s imagination is fine,” he said coldly. “He’s very intuitive, and observant, and he doesn’t have to like everyone,” he added, then glanced to the left, meeting Castiel’s intense gaze. He withstood it. 

Benjamin was full of bullshit, and if Cas wanted to be fed by it, Dean couldn’t care less. But there was no fucking way he’d let the pompous bastard express his stupid opinions on Jack.

“I’m gonna get myself a drink,” Dean said after a moment, deciding he would rather chew on his shoe than stay and be forced to talk to Benjamin. He stood up without waiting for any response, then started walking to the bar through the crowd of people, pissed at the whole world.

“Whisky, neat,” he said to the pretty bartender once he sat heavily on the stool. Why Castiel wanted to hang out with such an asshole was truly beyond him. Not only was Benjamin extremely self-righteous, but also ridiculously sassy and snotty.

“You look like your cat died, mate,” he suddenly heard to his right. When he looked that way, he saw a tall guy who had been speaking with his brother before. “You must be Dean. I don’t know if you recall, but we've actually met already. I'm Balthazar,” the guy said with a grin. 

“Yeah, I remember you,” Dean nodded, smiling back. He shook the guy's hand. “Cas told me a lot about you, man. Nice to see you here,” he said.

“Well, I wouldn’t miss Cassie's birthday party, would I?” Balthazar asked with a glint in his eyes.

Dean sighed. Even angry, he had to admit he still wanted to celebrate this day with his best friend. He glanced at the man sitting beside him. “Yeah, I know the feeling,” he finally admitted, sipping his drink.

“Oh boy,” Balthazar chuckled. “Did you two fight?”

Dean winced a little. “You tell me, man,” he said. “I can’t seem to get along with the pretty doctor.”

“Ah,” Balthazar said, nodding slowly. “Well, I’m not surprised, since he treats you like a competition.”

Dean, who took another sip of whisky in the meantime, almost choked to death. “What?” He managed to say.

“Don't play coy, my friend. You know what I mean,” Balthy smirked, then glanced in the direction of Cas’s sofa, where Benjamin moved even closer to Cas, leaning to his ear. “Are you going to do something about that?” Balthazar asked, raising his eyebrows at Dean.

Dean frowned. He didn't know why exactly, but he couldn't sense any hostile vibes from the tall Brit. “I’m not sure. Cas seemed okay with…” he waved his hand in the air, “...whatever this is.”

“That’s interesting, considering the fact they are not a couple, and Castiel moved to Porto, to the very same city you happen to live in,” Balthy muttered beside him with a smirk. “I think you should stop whining and get to work. Your beautiful face might actually not be enough, my handsome friend.”

Dean rolled his eyes at him, then shook his head. He would have to confront Castiel eventually, but he wanted to finish his drink first. He still had to give Cas his present, dammit.

“Or perhaps I’m wrong, this time,” Balthazar added quietly, looking over Dean’s shoulder.

“Dean,” he heard a deep voice from behind him a moment later.

“Cas,” he said with a smirk, not turning around.

“I think I’m needed elsewhere,” Balthazar muttered, patting Dean on the back once before disappearing into the crowd. 

Dean heard Cas sitting on the bar stool next to his.

“What do you think you’re doing?” Castiel asked, slightly raising his voice to be heard over the beat of the music.

“What do you mean?” Dean replied calmly, finally looking up. He could be a pain in the ass if he wanted to.

Cas’s jaw clenched in frustration. “Why are you acting like that?”

“You have to be a little more specific.”

“You are trying to do everything to argue with Benjamin. He is my friend. I don’t want you to fight with him,” Cas said, frowning.

Dean huffed, his anger simmering beneath the surface. “He is a douchebag, Cas. And he tries to stick his nose where it doesn’t belong.”

Cas’s eyes narrowed dangerously. “Oh, does he now? I’ve known him for over a decade, Dean. He is a part of my life, whether you want it or not. He knows me and Jack very well,” he shot back, standing up from his seat.

“Are you seriously defending him right now?” Dean asked with a frown.

“Yes. He is one of the very few people that I have left in my life.”

“Really?” Dean asked evenly, standing up as well. ”If he knows you guys so well, please tell me why doesn’t he even realize that Jack’s intuition is on point, Cas?” He shook his head in disbelief. “He's so into you that he'd say about anything, just to please you, man. Can't you fucking see that?” Dean asked, frustrated.

Castiel looked like Dean's words didn't surprise him in the slightest. He kept observing Dean with his steady gaze.

Dean knew what it meant. He saw it in Cas’s blue eyes, the truth behind it all. It hurt an awful lot. It made Dean even angrier than he had been before. 

He suddenly wished for Cas to feel the pain, too.

“You’re fucking him,” he said coldly.

Cas didn’t move a single muscle. Dean narrowed his eyes at him. “Tell me, did I actually have a shot here or did you just look for another piece of ass? You got bored or something?” He said through his teeth, not able to control his emotions any longer.

Castiel’s glare suddenly turned deadly. “You have no idea what you're talking about. You act like you know everything about me and Jack, but you don’t, Dean, not really,” Cas growled at him. The air between them crackled with tension. “I had a life in Sweden, friends and family, that now question my judgment because of my choices. Because of you,” he said, jabbing Dean in his chest. “You don't know what we had to go through, what I had to go through to get where I am now. And how could you possibly know that, if we’ve known each other only for a few weeks?” He asked harshly, then moved his face even closer to Dean’s. “What difference does it make if I slept with him? Does the body count really matter so much to you, Dean?” He stopped, glancing between Dean’s eyes. “You try to defend me and Jack from someone who means no harm, only because you believe he finds me attractive. Tell me, how does this logic apply to you?” Dean’s breath hitched, but he didn’t have time to react before Cas continued. “I once told you I have eyes, Dean. I can see what’s going on between you and me, but you need to know I can’t plan my future around a… a whim or an experiment. Meanwhile, you’re acting like a kid with a tantrum. Is this really how you want to approach this?” Cas asked, then shook his head slightly. “We can’t play house with you like that, this is not a game for me,” his voice wavered a little. “If there is even a trace of doubt in you, Dean, I can’t risk it. You have to understand that my son’s feelings are on the line here, too. And I won’t hesitate to choose Jack’s happiness, every time.”

Well, that - that stung a great deal, especially since it was partially true. Dean had fallen in love with the mere idea of the three of them, living peacefully together in his apartment. He also had no fucking clue how to be a good partner - for anyone, really, but especially not for Castiel, who seemed like he knew what he was doing. There was Jack in it, too, and Dean had absolutely no idea how to be a decent parent figure for the boy. He didn’t have his own children and he had made all of his past relationships shitty, not to mention he was completely new to the concept of being with a man.

Castiel was right. Even if he wanted to, Dean sure as hell wasn’t good enough for them. They deserved someone who acted like an adult, not some dude with a silly boat, stupid jokes, and a short temper. Even the pretty doctor Benjamin wasn’t good enough, and who was Dean in comparison, really?

“Yeah, okay,” Dean said coldly, a bitter realization washing over him. “My bad. I’m beginning to understand I made a huge mistake.” He reached into his pocket and pulled out a small package, wrapped in a colorful paper. “Here,” he said, pressing it into Cas’s hand. “Happy birthday, man. I’ll get out of your hair now. Have fun, I guess.”

Dean looked away, unable to keep his gaze at Cas’s eyes any longer. Angry and hurt, he started making his way out of the club. He wouldn’t cry, he decided. It would be pathetic. 

Just before he left the building, he could have sworn he saw Meg, sitting at the bar and smirking viciously at him.

Chapter Text

Dean had a clever defense mechanism that Sam thought was super dumb. Dean, however, didn't give a fuck about his brother's opinion - it worked, so it couldn’t really be stupid. Duh.

Every time Dean had been upset or pissed, he had managed to somehow calm himself down simply by staying on Baby. He didn't know if it worked for broken hearts as well, but he decided it was worth trying. 

Once he opened the Impala's door and stepped inside, Dean felt a little bit better. He still hated himself, but he didn’t have an urge to drown himself in whisky and vodka. He counted that as a win. 

He obviously couldn’t sail away, even if he really, really wanted to run. Sam needed time with his family and Benny had been absent, so Dean just had to go to work tomorrow, like the adult he apparently was. He only hoped that Castiel Novak wouldn’t quit first thing in the morning, leaving him completely alone with the whole company on his shoulders.

He rummaged through his lockers, looking for a bottle of whisky he was sure he still had somewhere. He could allow himself one drink, at least. He wouldn’t be drowning his sorrows this way, but perhaps the amber fluid would cheer him up a bit.

Once Dean finally managed to find the Scotch and a glass, he poured himself a drink and went back on the deck, sitting heavily in the cockpit. 

What had Dean been even trying to do here, really? What had he been thinking, falling for a pretty guy he had just met, right after he'd figured out he wasn't straight? Way to go, Winchester. He pulled out his phone and turned it off, ignoring all the missed calls and texts he had received after he'd run away from the club.

He took a sip of his drink, thinking what he could've done differently, but came up with nothing. It had been very easy to just fucking exist with Cas. Actually, he'd made Dean almost forget he didn’t like himself. Not that it mattered now, after Castiel had finally realized that Dean wasn’t worth his time. Too bad it had happened right after Dean had finally discovered exactly how he felt about Cas. Of course, he would fall in fucking love for the first time and get his heart broken right after.

Dean chuckled bitterly. Fucking feelings, man.

And not that he could do anything about it, really. It had quietly blossomed in his heart, as strong and unstoppable as a tide. And it was all there, the whole nine - the spark, the flame, the fucking conflagration, painfully burning him from the inside.

Dean looked at the night sky above his head. God, he was a moron. How could he let this happen? He knew he wasn’t good enough for anybody, let alone Castiel Novak, the great Angel of Alinghi. His fucking best friend. What a fucking mess.

He suddenly felt a wet drop traveling down his cheek, then another. Great, now he was crying alone on his own boat, like a complete loser. He swiped his tears away angrily, then took another sip of whisky. His father had once told him that a man should clean up his own mess. Dean thought that gender had no significance here, but he sure as hell brought this on himself, so he should now find a way out of it. He could start with avoidance, his favorite method of dealing with problems, right after running away from them. He could probably stay in the hangar for the rest of the week, which would provide a needed distance between him and Cas. He could also avoid staying in his apartment for now since it was full of happy memories that didn’t help in the slightest. His home would be empty soon enough, anyway, since Cas and Jack would move out, and Dean couldn’t exactly decide if it was for better or worse. 

Shit, he thought. I will probably never watch ‘The Lord of the Rings’ again.

He downed his drink, refusing to cry again. He fell in love, he could totally fall out of it, right?

+

Dean, wearing his overalls and a dust mask, was in the process of sanding the hull of their largest boat when he spotted movement behind all the dust he had created. He had started his work earlier than everyone else, trying to keep his hands and mind occupied with something other than Castiel. Not that he could sleep, anyway.

He turned off the grinder as he watched Benny slowly walk towards him. Dean put down his equipment and crossed his arms over his chest.

“Hey, chief,” his friend drawled, running his hand along the surface of the boat. “You missed a spot here.”

“I fucking didn’t,” Dean said, quirking his eyebrow. “Where the fuck have you been, you sonofabitch? I tried to call you!”

Benny nodded, looking at his shoes. “Yeah. I know. I was kinda avoiding you, Dean,” he said slowly.

“You don’t say,” Dean said dryly. 

“I should probably apologize. If I remember correctly, I made a move on you.”

Dean remembered, but in the light of current events, he'd decided to just let it go, if Benny was okay with that. The truth was that he couldn't bear to lose another friend. He sighed, then nodded. “Water under the bridge.”

Benny frowned. “That it?”

“Yeah, what do you want me to say? We ain’t gonna kiss and make up, you’re married. You were in rough shape, man.”

“I was, wasn’t I?” Benny chuckled. “Sorry, Dean. I didn’t mean to burden you with my problems like that.”

“Like I said, everything’s fine,” Dean said. “How are you holding up, anyway?”

“It’s tough,” Benny admitted. “And it ain’t pretty. But you might’ve been right about her being just mad at me. She always had a temper, that woman,” he shook his head. “We’re gonna run a blood test and see how things unfold, I guess,” he added, then looked Dean in the eyes. “It would be much easier if I didn’t love her so damn much.”

Dean nodded once, observing his friend’s face. He could at least relate to the last statement. Love was a fucking mess. “I’m really sorry, Benny. If you ever need to talk, just remember I’m here. But if you try to kiss me again, I’m gonna punch you in the face.”

Benny smirked, then nodded. “Understood, chief.”

“Great. Now get yourself into your work clothes and start sanding her, 'cause I’m not gonna do it by myself,” Dean said, reaching for the grinder. 

+

Dean knew it was gonna hurt like a bitch to see his apartment empty from all of Cas’s and Jack’s things, but he needed some spare clothes and a few personal things to stay on the Impala longer. He didn’t want to risk seeing Cas, so he waited until Friday evening to come back home and pack.

They had left his home super tidy, like Castiel had wanted to remove all traces indicating they had ever been there in the first place. Dean couldn’t even look in the direction of his blue couch, so he steered himself upstairs instead. He tried hard not to think too much while stuffing his underwear, jeans, and flannels into his duffel bag. 

He had somehow managed to avoid both Charlie and Sam during those few days, but he knew there was no way to keep this state forever. He actually wanted to mix himself out of the next family dinner at Sam’s, since Castiel would probably be there. Dean couldn’t bear to stay in the same room as him right now. He needed some time to lick his wounds.

When he finally turned around to look for his laptop, he spotted a note lying on his bedside table. A pang of pain ran through his chest. He knew who had left it there.

What was there left to say? Dean knew everything he had to on the topic, especially that he was a moron and he should probably listen to Sam and find some professional help instead of hiding in his boat. Tough luck.

He slowly approached the piece of paper as if it were a dangerous animal, then sat on his bed, keeping a safe distance. Maybe he could leave it there, for the rest of eternity? He didn’t really use this bedtime table, anyway.

Dean hesitated. There was a reason why Cas had left it in his bedroom. Not in the guest room, nor in the kitchen, but for some reason, in a place where Dean would definitely see it. He gulped, then finally reached for the note before he could change his mind. When he unfolded the paper, he saw Cas’s clear handwriting.

“Thank you, Dean.

I will leave the spare key to your apartment in the office.”

He felt overwhelming sadness spreading quickly through his body. He folded the note and put it back on the bedside table. It was probably for the best, he finally decided. There was no point in dragging it all any further. 

It didn’t mean it felt any better, though.

Dean closed his eyes, then took a few calming breaths. Yeah, he was so not going to his office this week. Sam would be back by Monday and Benny would stay in the hangar anyway, so Dean could easily sail somewhere. It wasn’t like anybody waited for him here.

He stood back up and started looking for his waterproof jacket in the closet. 

+

The day was beautiful, even if a bit windy. Dean sent a quick text to Sam and Charlie informing them he’s not gonna show up this week at work, then turned his phone off and hid it under all of his clothes in the duffel bag. He needed about 14 hours to get to Nazaré, so he decided to sail out early in the morning.

Once the lines were dropped, Dean started to feel a little bit lighter. He switched on the radio and put his second favorite playlist (without the Zepp’s, obviously) which managed to actually cheer him up. When he moved past the Porto buoys and hoisted his sails, he almost felt like a human being again.

He should go to a barber again, he thought when the wind tousled his hair. It was getting dangerously long. He closed his eyes, enjoying the sound of waves and the steady rock of Baby. Maybe he should just quit his work and sail around the world? He could always rent his apartment to someone.

Sailing was pleasant, letting Dean’s troubled mind finally rest. Occupied with the wind and waves, he managed to somehow not think about Cas, Jack, and his completely empty home all the time.

He spotted the mighty Fort of St. Michael the Archangel from the distance just before the lighthouse was lit up. The waves near the fort were huge, crashing into the cliff one by one. If he sailed closer, they would undoubtedly toss him right into the dangerous rocks like a ragdoll.

Dean had to turn the engine on and drop the sails soon after he passed the fort. The sun started to slowly set to his right, casting golden streams of light onto the ocean. Dean readjusted his fleece jacket, then marched below the deck to get his portable VHF.

“Marina da Nazaré, Marina da Nazaré, Marina da Nazaré, this is Impala, over,” he called out, his voice a little raspy, since he didn’t say a word for the whole day.

“Impala, Impala, this is Marina da Nazaré, please switch to channel 10, over,” he heard after a moment. 

Once he got the permission to dock, Dean prepared the fenders and lines and steered his boat to the harbor. He got pretty hungry, so he decided to find a nice bar with vegetarian burgers. He had started to avoid meat if he could. He still liked the taste, but he felt sorry for the animals, undoubtedly thanks to Jack and his neverending talks about little cows and pigs. The cheese was still too good to say no to, though.

Dean winced, then shook his head. The reason he was here was to forget about them, not dwell on his misery.

When the Impala’s fenders gently touched the quay ten minutes later, and Dean secured her with the lines, he moved to the steering wheel and turned the engine off. He ran his palm over his face, then went below the deck to fill the logbook. He glanced in the direction of his duffel bag, where he buried his phone. There was no way that his brother hadn't tried to contact him, he thought. The problem was that Dean had absolutely no idea what to say to him now. 

Resigned, he opened the map, looking for a place to satisfy his hunger.

+

On Tuesday morning, Dean berthed safely in Lagos, Portugal. He felt exhausted - he had been sailing for almost 24 hours straight. It did him good, even if he was about ready to pass out on the nearest couch.

He had opened his phone only once, early in the morning on Monday, just to check the weather forecast. He’d had about twenty missed calls from Sam, ten from Bobby, and a few from Charlie. He had ignored each and every single one of them. They knew he was alive, they could check the Baby’s AIS signal, he thought.

Cas didn’t try to contact him once. Dean wasn’t surprised. He wouldn’t try to contact himself either.

After he had taken care of the fee, the electricity, and the shower, Dean decided to turn his phone on again just to find a barber in the city. With that in mind, he rummaged through his things and finally pulled out his cell.

Not even ten seconds later the device started to violently vibrate. Dean almost dropped it, startled. It was Bobby, thank God. He picked it up.

“Hello?”

“What is going on, Dean?” He heard Bobby’s gruff, concerned voice. 

“Uhh…” he started unsure. 

“Don’t ‘uhh’ me, boy. Apparently, yer MIA since Saturday, so I’m asking again - what the hell happened?”

Dean sighed. “Listen, I’m not exactly in the best shape right now, Bobby. I need some time to clear my head,” he admitted, sitting by the table.

“Let me rephrase that for you, Dean. Tell me what happened between you and Castiel,” Bobby finally said, his voice stern. “Is he not into guys or something?”

Dean put his forehead on the table in front of him. “No, he’s into guys,” he said, thinking about stupid Benjamin. “He just uh… found out that I’m not exactly the perfect candidate for a partner.”

Bobby stayed silent for a few seconds. Dean had to actually look at the screen to check if the connection was lost before his old man spoke again. “Dean, are you sure that’s what he said?”

Dean frowned. Why would Bobby even ask that? “Yeah. And I’m not surprised he finally realized there was no point in hanging out with me. I’m not exactly a good catch.”

He heard Bobby sighting on the other end of the call. “Listen to me, you moron,” he started. “I don’t know this Castiel boy yet, but he would be damn stupid if he thought yer not worth the effort. And I know you wouldn’t fall for someone stupid. Yer daddy did a pretty number on your self-worth, Dean, but don’t let the dead man dictate yer life,” Bobby said, making Dean smile a little. “Don’t try to run away this time. Believe me when I say there are things worth coming back to. If there's a will, there's a way, y’know?”

Dean closed his eyes. He seriously doubted that Castiel wanted to have anything to do with him. Bobby sure as hell hadn't been in this club, he hadn't seen Castiel’s cold eyes and heard his angry voice.

Still, Dean was grateful for such an amazing parent, who tried to make sure Dean wouldn’t fall on his knees and fall apart.

“Thank you,” he said quietly. 

“Anytime, boy. Just stop being stubborn and yer gonna be golden. And remember that we love you,” Bobby said.

After he ended the call, Dean was surprised to discover he felt a little bit better. 

+

“Fucking hell,” Dean said, pulling up to his house on Thursday evening. Before his door stood a very pissed Charlie, with her arms crossed on her chest. When he locked the car and walked over to her, she huffed at him and shook his head. 

“Where the fuck did you go, dude?” She asked in her serious voice.

Dean sighed. “Away,” he said weakly. “Can we at least come inside?” He asked, unlocking his door. “You can totally shout at me there.”

Once the door to his apartment closed behind them, Charlie walked to the couch and sat down with a huff. Dean followed her and sat on the other side.

“You just randomly took off? I don’t think so, dude! I saw you storming out of the club on Cas’s birthday. What happened between you two?” She asked, frowning.

Dean sighed again, then glanced out of his window. “We had a fight, Charles,” he finally admitted. 

Charlie waved her hands in the air. “What does it even mean?”

There was no way around it, Dean thought. “It means that it didn’t work out. He’s not interested in uh… anything serious. With me,” he slowly said.

She narrowed her eyes at him. “Could you try to actually elaborate, Winchester?”

“I wanted to tell him everything at the party, but it went sideways, I guess,” Dean said.

Charlie stayed silent for a moment, then finally said - “there is no fucking way he doesn’t want something more, too. What did you do?”

“Why do you assume I did something bad?” Dean asked, offended. “I mean, I was mean to him, but it was after I found out he’s screwing Benjamin.”

“Dean,” Charlie whined. “Tell me what exactly happened.”

“I don’t know, it kinda got out of hand and Cas got pissed and I was angry and I said something stupid. Then Cas got angry and he said…” Dean stopped, looking at his hands. “He basically said that he can’t trust me, or something like that. Please don’t make me say that again,” Dean said, closing his eyes. 

“Did you try to like, talk to Cas after that?” Dean shook his head. “Why?” Charlie asked.

“Oh, because I’m this incredible at talking, and it went so well the last time,” Dean grumbled. 

Charlie frowned at him. “Dude, get a grip. You should totally apologize if you said something nasty, that’s what apologies are actually for, Dean! And Cas had already left Benjamin behind when he moved here. And he’s not straight! That’s actually good!”

Dean felt his frustration rising. “I don’t care.”

“Yes, you do! Stop sabotaging yourself! I can’t believe you’re like this.”

“Charles,” Dean said weakly. “I have no fucking clue what I’m doing here. He was right telling me to fuck off.” Dean took a big breath, then rubbed his eyes with his hand. “I ran because I didn't know what to do,” he finally admitted. “I… I think I’m in love with him.”

Charlie's eyes widened and her face instantly dropped. “Oh, Dean,” she said quietly, then scooted closer and hugged him. They stayed like that for a while. “Remember that I’m here if you need me,” she finally said. Dean nodded, not sure if he wouldn’t cry if he said anything back. 

“You know you can't leave it like this, especially now, when you know how you feel about him,” she said quietly, pulling away a little.

“Yeah, I'm not sure about that,” Dean admitted. The thought of potential talk about their argument almost sent him into panic mode. He had said some nasty stuff to Cas. He wouldn't want to talk with whoever said things like that to him.

“I love you, you know?” Charlie added after a moment.

“I know.”

+

On Friday, early in the morning, Dean opened the door to his office. The building was almost empty at this hour, so the only person he had seen was Jody behind the security desk. He didn’t want to risk meeting Cas. Or Meg, for that matter.

It’s not like he could actually sleep, anyway. For the first time since their move-out, Dean had decided to spend the night in his apartment. It had been a depressing experience, really. The quiet morning felt more like punishment and sorrow than anything else.

When he slowly put his head into the room, he saw not only the dreadful spare key but also a stack of papers, neatly organized on his desk.

Right. The revised budget. It seemed like Cas wanted to lure him to the office with the key to take care of the numbers as well. Dean sighed, then finally stepped into the space and closed the door behind him. He was here anyway, he could make some actual use of it and check the damn budget.

He got to work soon after.

He was in the middle of the tenth page when suddenly, the door to his office flew open and his panicked brother stormed in.

“Spill,” he said right after his angry gaze landed on Dean.

“Good morning to you too, Sam,” Dean grumbled.

“What the fuck happened, Dean? You suddenly just disappeared! And… and got a haircut!” He said accusingly. “What is wrong with you?”

“Jesus. Okay,” Dean muttered, eyeing his brother. “How much time do you actually have? I’ve got a list, somewhere.”

“Dean, I swear to God-” Sam started, but Dean stopped him with his raised hand.

“Okay, cool the jets and sit your ass before your head explodes,” he said, pointing at the sofa and trying to gather his thoughts at the same time. “So I uh… I wasn’t completely honest with you earlier,” Dean started when Sam finally settled on the couch.

Sam huffed. “I figured that much, Dean,” he said. “About what, exactly?”

Dean rolled his eyes at him. “About Cas,” he said quietly. “Okay, so I told you how we had met and all that, but I kinda skipped some things,” he admitted, looking out of the window. Sammy stayed silent, clearly waiting for Dean to continue. “He’s actually the reason I figured out I’m bisexual. I realized I’m attracted to him after we had spent some time together,” Dean finally said.

Sam frowned. “What? You are attracted to him?”

“I just told you that.”

“Wait, are you, like, a couple?”

“No, we’re not. We are just friends, at least we were until last Tuesday. We kinda had a serious fight on his birthday. I wanted to tell him that I have feelings for him, but I didn’t even get to that part before we said pretty mean things to each other.”

“You wanted to confess your feelings?” Sam asked, his eyes big. “Dean, what exactly did you want to tell him?”

Dean ran his hand over his face, then looked at his brother. God, he felt exhausted. “What do you think, Samantha?”

Sam’s jaw dropped. “Did you actually fall in love with Castiel Novak, Dean?”

Dean narrowed his eyes. “You really want me to say it out loud, don’t you?”

“Oh shit,” Sam muttered, then stood up from the sofa. “You did,” he said, then started pacing around the room. “He could be my brother-in-law,” Sam mumbled to himself.

Dean’s frown deepened. “Excuse me?”

Sam turned his gaze to Dean again. “What happened? Why did you two fight?”

Dean winced. “It’s complicated. The bottom line is, I’m not actually a partner material, Sammy.”

Sam frowned at him. “What? You would be a great boyfriend or whatever.”

“Yeah, 'cause I was in so many happy relationships before,” Dean said with a pained smile.

Sam huffed. “Dean, you’re caring, honest, and great with kids. You’re a mean cook and you’re funny. And I guess you don’t look too horrible.” Dean sent him an annoyed look. “My point is, you are capable of, y’know, being with someone. My best guess is that you’ve just never met anyone you wanted to really be with. Until now, I mean,” Sam ended with a small smile.

Dean looked at his brother in disbelief. “You really think that about me?”

“Of course I do,” Sam said, shaking his head. “Did you try to talk to him after the party?”

“Nope.”

“Maybe you should?” Sam asked.

“You’re kinda the third person that says the same thing to me,” Dean admitted, looking at the papers before him.

“Why am I always the last one who learns about everything?” Sam asked, offended.

Dean sent him a sly smile. “'Cause you can’t keep your mouth shut.”

Sam huffed, then sat back down. “That's not true,” he said, then looked out the window. “Shit, I had no idea,” he muttered under his breath. “La Rochelle is gonna be weird now.”

“Oh, right, ‘The Grand Pavois’ is tomorrow. I actually forgot about that,” Dean said. “When do you fly out?”

“Tomorrow morning,” Sam said, then raised his eyebrow at Dean. “Wait, if you guys don’t talk to each other, you actually don’t know that Cas went back to Sweden to sell his apartment. We’re gonna meet at the hotel.”

Dean sighed. It was better that way, he thought, since there was no real risk of him bumping into Cas, for the next few days at least. He wanted to say just that to his brother, but his phone chose this exact moment to start ringing loudly. When he pulled the device out, he saw Jack’s name on the screen. He frowned, then picked up. 

“What’s going on, bud?” He asked.

“Dean,” he heard a sad, small voice on the other side of the call. Before he realized what he was doing, Dean was already in motion, his keys and wallet in his hands. He waved to frowning Sam and rushed outside of his office. “I need your help,” the boy continued.

“Talk to me, Jackie. What happened?” Dean asked, already halfway to the elevator. “Where are you?”

The boy sniffled. Dean’s heart sank a little. “At school.”

“Did someone do something bad to you?” Dean asked, pressing the button down several times to speed up the process.

“You could say that,” Jack replied, clearly on the verge of tears. Dean was about ready to murder whoever did this to the boy.

“Okay, listen to me. Are you in any danger at the moment?”

“No,” Jack answered quietly.

“Good. I’m on my way, bud. Don’t move anywhere.”

Not even ten minutes later, Dean, who'd possibly broken a few traffic laws on his way, stopped the Mustang in front of the school and jumped out of the car, looking for the boy. When he finally spotted his dark blond hair, Dean hurried across the lawn to the bench Jack was sitting on. Once he approached the kid, he saw his red, teary eyes. Luckily, he didn’t have any visible injuries. Without a word, Dean knelt down and hugged the boy, who almost immediately started crying.

“It’s okay,” Dean said quietly, rocking him gently. “It’s okay, Jack. I’m here.”

They stayed like this for several minutes, until Jack finally managed to calm down. “What happened, kid?” Dean asked, pulling himself away a little.

Jack took a few big breaths, clearly calming himself down. “Miss Hannah was really mean to me. She said that God intended us all to follow his teaching and that the Big Bang and dinosaurs are just theories. I said that there was proof for both, but she started getting angry and told me to read the Bible. I told her there are better books to find information than the Bible, but she said that the moral code from the Bible is the most important one and that I would benefit more from reading it than from any other material. I told her that I could name ten books out of my head that are more important for science and society than the Bible, and she told me to leave the classroom and come back with my parents. And dad is not here, so I called you,” the boy said, sniffling at the end.

“You did good, Jackie. I’m so sorry,” Dean said, then hugged Jack again. He would strangle the bitch. “Show me where can I find this Miss Hannah, okay? We’re going to solve this, once and for all.”

Jack nodded, then sniffled again and finally stood up from the bench. He led Dean into the school building, and then through the gray corridors. When they stopped in front of one of the classrooms, Dean knocked politely and opened the door. He saw a bunch of kids and a pretty, surprised brunette inside.

“Can I help you?” She asked.

“I’m here because you told Jackie that he should show up with an adult. Can we talk for a moment?” Dean asked with a strained smile.

“Oh…” The lady frowned, then looked at the kids in front of her. “Right. Do exercise 10, please. I’ll be right back,” she said, then stepped out of the room and glanced at Jack, then at Dean standing beside him with his arms crossed.

“I’m sorry, who exactly are you? I thought Jack’s dad was going to come,” she said, looking around.

Yeah, I bet you did.

“I’m Jack’s guardian. Nice to meet you, I’m Dean,” he said, sending her a nasty smile. “You see, we thought that this school was open to different beliefs and lifestyles. Imagine my utter shock when Jackie told me that you had imposed your beliefs on him and had told him to read a book that is not in his area of interest. Your management will undoubtedly be interested in such behavior of their employee, don't you think? Especially when the kid presented specific, logical arguments to reject the proposed thinking and behavior,” Dean said evenly. He could see the panic rising quickly in Miss Hannah’s eyes.

“Well, I mean…” she started unsure. “He presented his view, but the Bible-”

“I’m sorry, let me stop you right there,” Dean cut her off. “Maybe I didn't express myself clearly enough. You have absolutely no right to tell the kid what he should or shouldn’t think, as long as it’s not mean or against the law. Even then, you should work on proper communication with the children left in your care, lady. Jack is the smartest kid I know and as far as I am concerned, he did nothing wrong, but you decided to kick him out of your classroom, anyway. I am not going to allow such behavior. I’m taking him home today, so I expect him to be excused from the rest of today's classes. Are we clear?” He asked, raising his eyebrow.

“I understand,” the lady said, sending Dean a deadly glare. Dean didn’t care. She could choke on a bag of dicks.

“Great,” he grinned, then glanced at Jack. “Ready to go home, bud?” When Jack nodded happily, Dean turned to the teacher. “Have a nice day,” he said, then winked at her and led Jack to his car.

“That was awesome!” Jack yelled when they were sitting inside the Mustang. “She was speechless! Dad would never do such a thing,” Jack said, shaking his head in disbelief.

“I’m not sure about that, kid. Speaking of which, you should probably call him. I shouldn’t really be the one to take you home,” Dean said, then frowned. “Where is your Uncle Gabe, anyway?”

“I didn’t call him. He’s useless,” Jack said, his eyes turning sad again. “I missed you, Dean,” he said, his lips trembling.

“Come here,” Dean said, hugging the boy to his chest. “I missed you, too, bud,” he said, his voice slightly wavering. 

“Did you fight with Castiel?” Jack asked after a moment. Dean realized it was the first time he heard Jack calling his dad by his name.

“Yeah, a little,” Dean admitted, pulling away.

“He isn’t well, Dean. He is very sad and angry all the time. He misses you, too,” Jack said. “Do you think you could make up when he comes back?” 

Dean felt a pang of sadness spreading in his chest. God, it was all so messed up. “Shit. I’m so sorry you were caught in the middle of this, Jackie.”

“Dean, can you please talk to him?” Jack pleaded. “I don’t want you to fight with each other.”

“How are you so smart, kid?” Dean asked, smiling a little. “Okay. We’re gonna talk, I promise. For now, just inform him you’re with me. I might actually be in trouble since I told your teacher that I’m your guardian. I probably shouldn’t have done that,” he said.

“My battery died,” Jack said, sheepish.

“Oh…” Dean started, then nodded, pulling out his phone. “Right. We're gonna use mine, then.” His heart started beating faster and he felt a little sick as he dialed Cas’s number. Would he even pick up?

“Dean?” Cas’s deep, surprised voice rumbled in the car a moment later.

“Hey, Dad,” Jack said, looking at Dean. 

“Jack?” Cas asked, very confused. “What's going on? Are you with Dean?”

Dean gulped. He realized he actually missed hearing his name said in Cas's rich voice. 

“Hey,” he spoke weakly. “I'm sorry for bothering you, but Jack's battery died. He uh… he called me, he had a problem at school,” Dean said, glancing at the boy. “I’m sure he’s gonna tell you more about it later. Anyway, if the school contacts you that a strange guy kidnapped your son, It would probably be me, I guess... But all's fine now, so don’t worry.”

“Dad, Dean told Miss Hannah to stop being mean to me and that I’m very smart,” Jack added excitedly.

“She was mean to you?” Castiel asked, alarmed. “Are you alright?”

“Yes, now I am. Can I stay at Dean’s place? Please!” The boy pleaded.

Cas didn't respond right away like he wasn't certain what to say. “Jack, I’m not sure it’s such a great idea,” he finally said. “Where is Gabriel, anyway?”

“He’s stupid, Dad. He sleeps until noon, watches strange movies, and orders takeaways every day.”

Dean snorted.

“Oh my God,” Cas mumbled to himself. “Jack, can I talk to Dean for a moment?”

“Yeah,” Jack nodded.

Dean almost passed out, but managed to actually push the button and put the phone to his ear. “What’s up?” He asked, trying to sound normal, not like the frightened, wounded animal he had actually been for the last few days.

“I’m so sorry, Dean. I’m going to murder my brother. Is Jack okay?” Cas asked, his voice concerned.

“Yeah, don’t sweat it. He’s fine. Can I make him dinner, at least? I will take him to Gabe after that.”

Cas stayed silent for a beat like he was trying to formulate his thoughts. “Of course. Thank you, Dean. Just… Thank you for being there for my son when I couldn’t. It means the world,” he finally said, his voice wavering. 

“Yeah, okay, don’t make me blush. You wanna talk to the kid again?”

“Yes, please,” Cas said, so Dean passed the phone to Jack and started the engine, trying to calm himself down with deep breaths.

+

“You want more spaghetti, Jack?” Dean asked from his kitchen. 

“No, I’m full,” the kid responded. They were sitting on Dean’s couch and playing ‘The Witcher’ on Dean’s PS4. Dean had made them dinner and almost teared up when Jack had said it was delicious.

Suddenly, they heard a knock on Dean’s door. Once Dean opened them up, he saw Gabe’s panicked face. 

“Is Jack here?” He asked but didn’t wait for an answer, passing Dean and inviting himself inside. “Jack?”

“What?” The boy grumbled from the couch, his eyes narrowed at his uncle.

“Did Miss Hannah really kick you out of the classroom?”

“Yes.”

“Why didn’t you call me?” Gabe asked, frowning.

“I don’t trust you. You’re interrupting our game session,” Jack stated, then focused on the screen again. 

Gabe’s frown deepened, then he glanced at Dean. “Why doesn’t he trust me?”

Dean rolled his eyes. “Dunno, man. Perhaps you should ask the kid, not me. You wanna vegan spaghetti?”

“No, thanks,” Gabe said, sitting by the table. “Cassie is going to kill me. He is seriously pissed,” he said quietly.

“Well, what can I say?” Dean sat beside him. “You kinda fucked up,” he whispered, so only Gabe could hear him.

“Not helping, amigo,” Gabe shook his head, then glanced at the boy again. “It’s actually scary how he’s so freakin’ similar to Castiel.”

“I don't know, man. It's kinda adorable,” Dean said, glancing at the boy. He really missed his presence in his home. “You know we fought, right? Cas is pissed at me, too,” he added, looking back at Gabe.

Gabriel chuckled. “Oh he is pissed, alright, but I’m not sure if he's pissed at you exactly. I mean, you’re a big part of it, but he’s more angry at himself,” he said, studying Dean's face. “At least now I’m sure you’re not trying to lure him into some kind of pyramid scheme with your pretty face or something.”

Dean frowned. “What are you talking about?”

“It was almost too good to be true, Dean-o! A stable job in a sunny country is a dream. When my stubborn brother called me and said he was gonna move to Porto to work in a corporation, I thought he was either joking, or it was a fraud.”

Dean smirked. “What exactly changed your mind? The first paycheck? Or perhaps I’m not really this pretty?”

Gabe’s gaze turned serious. “No, actually it was everything I saw those last few weeks. You and your family are a real deal,” he said, nodding. “I also couldn’t really miss the way you two look at each other,” he added after a beat. Dean felt a blush creeping on his cheeks. “You know, Dean-o, my brother is not really the type to date people. He was pretty lonely before you showed up,” Gabe continued.

Dean snorted. “Yeah, and Benjamin is following him like a dog because they're just friends,” he retorted. 

Gabe frowned. “I didn't take you for a heartless person, Dean,” he said, resting his elbows on the table before him. “Old Benji is head over heels for Cassie, he has been for years, actually. Unfortunately for him, my brother doesn’t reciprocate those feelings.”

Dean’s jaw dropped. “What?” He finally managed to say, making sure that Jack wouldn’t overhear them. “But they are, like, sleeping together.”

Gabe chuckled. “Oh I’m not talking about sex,” he answered in a hushed tone. “I’m talking about being in a normal relationship. You see, Cassie’s got a problem with getting attached to other people, and he doesn’t like when someone gets too close to Jack. I guess even after all these years, Benjamin still has hope, especially since he saw you and him together. He thinks that Castiel will finally break and change his mind.”

“Why are you telling me all this, Gabe?” Dean asked, observing Cas’s brother.

Gabriel cocked his brow. “I love my brother, kiddo. I want him to be happy. I believe you’re the best bet here and I simply wanted to give you the head start. Besides, he trusts you with his son, and Jack seems to like you. That’s actually all that I need to know for now. Don’t fuck this up, champ,” Gabe ended quietly, winking at Dean, then turned to Jack. 

“Come on, little Castiel, you’ve gotta do your homework,” he said to the boy.

“Don’t call me that, Gabe,” Jack growled at him but stood up from the couch.

“Alright, sorry. Let’s get you home, kiddo.”

“Don’t call me that, either,” Jack said. “I don’t want to go,” he whined, then looked at Dean with pleading eyes.

“Jackie,” Dean chuckled. “C’mon, enough with the puppy dog eyes. Gabe’s right, you’ve got school tomorrow.”

Jack glanced at his uncle, then back at Dean. He looked like he wanted to cry. “Don’t make such a sad face, kid,” Dean said, then opened his arms. Jack walked to him and wrapped Dean in a tight hug. “Everything’s going to be fine,” Dean said quietly, pulling him closer. “If something happens, just give me a call, alright?” When he felt Jack nodding, Dean let go.

“Thanks again, Dean,” Gabe said, taking Jack’s backpack from his hands. “See you around.”

“Don’t mention it.”

When Dean finally closed the door behind them, he marched to his vinyl collection and moved his hand over the albums. The music always gave him peace when his thoughts became too loud. 

So, according to Gabe, Cas had a problem with forming romantic bonds, but not with casual sex. Dean put a chosen vinyl on the turntable, then closed his eyes and sighed, listening to the first notes of Mumford & Sons ‘White Blank Page’. 

He didn't really know what to think anymore. He would lie if he said that Gabe’s words didn’t give him any hope. The problem was, Dean had said pretty awful and unnecessary stuff to Cas. Very stupidly, he’d let the anger and jealousy overcome him, hurting the person he loved in the process. If that wasn’t enough, his behavior had caused pain not only to Cas himself, but to Jack as well.

There was also the whole situation with returning the spare key, which still hurt like a bitch. Cas's note on Dean's bed seemed final. 

To be honest, Dean was scared shitless to talk to Cas. His brain kept screaming at him to just hide and run, even if deep inside he knew he couldn’t do that anymore. It was time for Dean to finally find some courage and apologize, like a normal human being. 

If there was really a way to get Cas back, at least as his best friend, Dean had to do absolutely everything in his power to make it happen.

+

“What do you mean you can't go to France?” Dean asked, the porridge in the bowl in front of him long forgotten.

“Lin is sick. What do you want me to do, Dean? I can't leave Eileen alone with all the kids here!” Sam said with a raised voice. He was trying to be louder than his little daughter, who was crying her eyes out in the background.

“No, I… I get it,” Dean stuttered. He felt a little bit dizzy. “It's just that…” Cas is gonna be there, “I need to actually go by plane to get there. You know I hate flying,” Dean finally said, looking at his bowl. He wasn't hungry anymore. 

“Yeah, sorry but I don't care about your stupid fear right now. You're gonna be fine, Dean. Cas is there, so it's even better. You will talk with him and all that. Go, team love.”

Dean gulped.

“Okay, go and pack. You've got like an hour to get to the airport,” Sam added after a pause. “I need to go,” he added and ended the call, not even waiting for Dean's answer.

Dean sat there for a few seconds, trying not to vomit. What was he even going to say to Cas? And if that wasn’t enough, he had to get there by plane. 

I wonder if I have any sedatives left, he thought while standing up. 

+

For obvious reasons, the Marina in La Rochelle was much busier than when Dean had been there a few months earlier. The quay was now filled with various boats, flags, and advertising banners. And lots and lots of people.

From what Dean had managed to learn, Singer and Winchesters had sent here four of their sailboats, Ed, Harry, and some kid from the IT department, who had apparently come to their company from the States for an internship. Charlie had stated he was a genius.

Dean zipped up his jacket and looked around. He still felt a little nauseous from the flight and his head hurt like a bitch. Truly perfect conditions to get his best friend back, he thought, dragging himself in the direction of the hotel. According to Sam's text, Castiel should already be here.

When Dean stepped into the building and approached the reception desk, he saw strangely familiar, blond hair and a pretty ass in a tight, green dress to his left. He sighed, knowing too well what was going to happen next.

Bela spotted him soon after.

“Well hello, you,” she said with a smirk. “What a coincidence.”

Dean gave her a polite smile. “It is. Are you here for business?”

“Miss Talbot, here's the card to your room,” the receptionist interjected.

Dean frowned. “Talbot? As in ‘Talbot and Associates’?” He asked, quirking his eyebrow at Bela. The company was widely known for selling motorboats, but Dean knew the owner was an old dude. 

“The same one, Dean. How do you know it?” Bela asked, interested.

“It looks like we're in the same business, Miss Talbot,” Dean chuckled, passing his documents to the receptionist. Bela traced his movements, trying to read his name on the ID.

“Look at that,” she said, meeting his gaze again, her smirk widening. “And we stay at the same hotel. What a coincidence, indeed,” she said, touching his shoulder. “I’m sure we’ll see each other again, Dean,” she added with a wink before directing her steps to the elevator. 

Dean watched her go, then sighed again and turned to the receptionist in front of him. “Could you tell me if my associate has already arrived? Under the name of Castiel Novak.”

“It appears that Mister Novak shares the room with you, Mister Winchester, and he arrived about an hour ago,” she said politely. “Can I do anything else for you?”

Dean felt a wave of nausea hitting him in the stomach. 

“Is there a possibility of booking another room?” He asked weakly.

“I’m sorry. I’m afraid the hotel is fully booked at the moment,” the woman said, handing him the card to the room.

Dean tiredly rubbed his eyes with his hand, then thanked the lady, took his duffel bag, and dragged himself to the elevator. 

Worst case scenario, he could sleep on one of the boats, right?

When he finally found the room, he tapped the card on the reader and opened the door, holding his breath. Cas had definitely been here, his duffel bag was lying on the big bed placed in the middle, but the guy was nowhere to be seen. 

And speaking of the bed, there was only one in the room and nothing else to sleep on. Dean frowned. Had Sam planned to cuddle with Castiel during the two nights he was supposed to spend here or was the company in some kind of financial trouble that Dean didn’t know of, which required for the management to sleep in a double bed from now on?

Fuck it. He would go and sleep on the boat. He already had enough on his plate, without the stupid bed to share with his pissed-off, best friend.

Dean was angry, sore, and tired, but there was no time to rest, really. He had to check in with the organizers, search for their stand with promotional materials, and talk with people. He had no clue what the event plan was, so he should definitely check that out. He put his duffel bag next to Cas’s and hung his suit on the hanger. There was supposed to be some kind of party in the evening, and of course, Dean had to wear a fucking suit.

Why was everything so difficult these days?

Once Dean put on his company shirt and jacket, he directed his steps back to the marina. He couldn’t spot their sailboats right away, so he decided to take a walk through the quay, observing the other, berthed vessels. For some reason, their competition aimed to widen the cockpits and raise the hulls of the sailboats. Dean wasn't exactly a fan of those ideas.

Before he managed to spot the Singer and Winchesters logo on a flag nearby, he greeted and chatted with almost twenty different people. It was quite obvious that after a few years, he and Sam would be recognized in those kinds of events. 

When Dean walked up to their stand, nestled between two of their sailboats, his jaw dropped. On the banner behind Harry, he saw Cas in his white button-down shirt, rolled-up sleeves, leaning against the hull of their 50,5 feet sloop. With his piercing, ocean eyes and tousled hair, his arms crossed, he looked like a sex on a stick. When Dean looked down at the table, he saw their flyers with another photo of Castiel, this time standing behind the steering wheel with his hands in his pockets.

Crowley really aimed to make Cas a walking, talking advertisement for their company. Dean glanced at Harry, who didn’t even notice that Dean was standing in front of him.

“Stop scrolling on your phone, man,” he said, looking for Ed.

Harry looked up, surprised, then quickly hid his phone away. “Hi, chief! I didn’t know you were going to be here,” he said.

“Yeah, something came up and Sam couldn’t make it,” Dean said, inspecting the flyers. “Where is everyone?”

“Uh, Ed is on the deck with some clients and I sent Kevin to get us food,” Harry supplied. “You’ve just missed Mister Castiel, he said he was going to greet the organizers.”

Dean took a big breath, then nodded and looked at the sailboat to his right, where he could now see Ed’s head emerging from below the deck. He was almost sure that ‘Kevin’ was actually the name of the internship kid that Charlie had mentioned.

“Right, okay. Any problems?”

“None, boss. Plenty of people want to see our vessels. And uh… The flyers are quite popular.”

Dean smirked. Yeah, Cas was one handsome devil, no surprise everyone wanted to take a flyer with his face on it and take it home with them. 

“Good. Go, help Ed, I’ll stay here and talk to the potential clients,” Dean said, then switched places with Harry. If Cas had really taken care of the organizers, Dean could probably sit down and relax for a minute or two. God, his head was killing him.

“Dean-o, I didn’t know you were going to be here,” he suddenly heard to his right. He had been clearly wrong, this day could get worse.

“Meg,” he said, sighing. “Is there a reason I am talking to you right now?” He asked, focusing on his phone.

Meg scoffed, then looked around. “Don’t worry, I don’t want to talk to you either. I’m looking for Clarence.”

“Yeah, as you can see, he’s not here. You can go away now,” he said, glancing at his screen again. The ‘probably Kevin’ kid clearly didn’t waste time, constantly updating their social media with information from the boat show. There even was a photo of Castiel shaking hands with one of the organizers.

“Wow, aren’t you the life of the party?” She asked, then stepped closer. “Are the two of you still not talking? You ruffled his feathers pretty badly on his birthday.”

“It’s none of your business, Meg. Don't you have some witch coven you need to attend?” Dean shot back at her. 

She smirked nastily. “Nah, I think I’ll stick around. I have some big plans for tonight, you see, involving our mutual friend. I hope he will like my dress. It doesn't leave much to the imagination.”

“Yeah, good for you,” Dean said, not really paying any attention to her. He looked around. He was getting hungrier by the second. Perhaps he could order a pizza here?

Meg frowned, then clearly decided there was no point in talking to him if it didn't bring the desired result - namely, Dean's misery. She disappeared soon after, leaving him alone at their stand again.

The rest of the day passed uneventfully, filled with conversations with clients and competitors. Dean encountered some familiar faces, including Mick Davies searching for a new yacht, and Bela Talbot, who playfully winked at him every time she passed. Dean even managed to order a pizza and finally meet the IT kid (his name was Kevin, after all). 

He didn’t see Cas for the whole day. 

When the sun started to set, Dean decided it was time to pack up the stands. He had finally managed to get his hands on the program and he knew the party was supposed to start at nine. They had to actually stuff everything into their company van, so he ordered Ed and Harry to take care of that, while he decided to sneak out to their room to take his duffel bag and transport it on one of the boats.

Dean entered the hotel lobby and looked around, but he didn’t spot Cas anywhere. He took a deep breath, then directed his steps to the stairs. A possible meeting in the confined space of the elevator was out of the question.

When he reached their floor, he stuck his head around the corner to confirm it was empty. Luckily, he found himself completely alone. With his heart in his throat, Dean approached the room and pressed his ear against the door. He couldn’t hear a thing, so he tapped the card on the reader.

Dean could now hear the muffled sound of running water to his right, indicating that Cas was taking a shower. He slowly closed the door behind himself, then tiptoed to his duffel bag, lifting it from the bed. When he quietly turned to his suit, the sound of the water stopped suddenly. His blood ran cold.

“Dean?” He heard Cas’s voice from the bathroom. “Are you there?”

Dean stopped breathing. He hurriedly grabbed the hanger with his suit and stormed out of the room before Cas had a chance to realize what was happening. He sprinted toward the stairs, taking them two at a time.

When he finally stopped in front of the boats, he struggled to catch his breath. He looked around, but Castiel didn’t seem to be chasing him. Dean took a few more calming breaths, then finally opened the 45-foot sloop and went below the deck, closing the boat from the inside.

He acted like a lunatic again, he thought, sitting by the table. His head was pounding and he was sweaty and gross, so dressing up in a suit and gathering in a tent full of douchebags seemed like the last thing Dean wanted to do right now. 

Besides, Cas would actually be there, and Dean wouldn’t be able to avoid him. 

As he buttoned his black shirt, he felt a wave of anxiety washing over him.

+

Once he reached the party tent some time later, Dean spotted Castiel almost right away. Squeezed into a black tuxedo and with a glass of champagne in hand, Cas was surrounded by quite a group of people, greedily watching his every move.

He took Dean’s breath away.

It suddenly dawned on Dean that Cas really was a celebrity in the sailing world. It seemed he captivated the crowd with every word, or perhaps just with his presence. He looked stunning, with his sharp jaw and ocean eyes, vividly gesticulating with his free hand while he talked. 

In the mass of faces, Dean spotted Meg, who had successfully infiltrated the circle around Cas. Her dress was indeed very short and very shiny, and she seemed to be gradually getting closer to Castiel’s arm.

Dean turned his head away from them. His mood was nasty, his head was still hurting, and on top of all that, he started getting hungry again. The solutions to at least two of his problems - booze and food - were currently sitting on the table behind him, so he directed his steps there, deciding to stuff his face with cheese and whisky. What was the point of the boat show if not to eat free food and drink free alcohol?

There used to be casual sex among those things once, but the only person he really wanted to see naked was currently angry at him and surrounded by every important douchebag in the room. 

Dean grabbed a plate, loading it with funny-looking cheese, rolls, and salad, then moved to the whisky station. They had quite good stuff here, so he helped himself with three fingers of expensive Scotch, then retreated to a relatively quiet corner of the tent. As he nibbled on the smelly cheese, he saw that Meg had now successfully hung onto Cas's shoulder and desperately tried to send him flirtatious glances. It would even be funny if Dean didn’t hate her so much. He took a sip of whisky, observing as the demon painfully doubled her efforts to fuck his best friend on the nearest surface when he suddenly heard a gruff, familiar voice to his left.

“I never took you for a loner type, Dean,” Crowley said, raising his eyebrow. He had a glass of whisky in his hand. “Why aren’t you standing beside Feathers in the circle of fame?”

“I was hungry,” Dean replied without turning his gaze away from Cas.

“Yes, it seems so,” Crowley said, then followed Dean’s line of sight. “I was actually shocked Castiel didn’t quit, bearing in mind your recent fight. Meg told me it was quite a show.”

“You don’t say,” Dean retorted, giving Crowley an eye roll.

“Don’t get me wrong, I don’t really care if you like him or not, as long as you don’t make my job more difficult,” Crowley continued, narrowing his eyes at Dean. ”You see, he is good for the business,” he hissed.

“Believe it or not,” Dean started, sending him a nasty smile, “I don’t give a fuck about the business right now,” he said, then stuffed his face with a salad.

“Well, I do. That’s my job. You just have to build those little boats of yours and smile from time to time.”

Dean made a face at him. He would look much tougher if his cheeks weren’t still full of food.

“It baffles me how you actually managed to find him, while I couldn't,” Crowley muttered more to himself than anyone else. “When he used to race, he was mainly just focused on the results. He was like a machine, stubborn and unshakable. I can see he has changed,” Crowley said, then glanced back at Dean who managed to finally swallow the salad. “But believe me, he is very determined if he wants to. And he is almost deadly when he’s angry,” he stopped, raising his eyebrow. “So don’t make him angry again, Squirrel.”

“Gee, if I didn’t know any better, I’d say that you’re scared of him, Crowley,” Dean said flatly.

“Just take the bloody advice,” Crowley said, taking a sip of his whisky. “And mind you, I wouldn't give it to just anyone. I gave it specifically to you because he seems to be fond of you, and you tend to be pretty annoying.”

“Go to hell, man,” Dean retorted, sipping his drink.

“Yes, I was actually planning to do just that. Remember what I said. Have a nice evening,” Crowley said with a smirk, then disappeared into the crowd before Dean could say anything else.

God, he was too sober for this shit, Dean thought, shoveling the rest of the salad into his mouth. When he glanced at Cas again, he saw him immersed in the discussion with one of the organizers, with Meg plastered to his side.

Just as Dean was trying to decide if he should drown his sorrows in more whisky or just hide on the boat, he saw Bela approaching him with a swing in her hips.

“How’s the party, stranger?” She asked, smiling sweetly. “And why are you standing here, completely alone?”

“I got hungry.”

“I see,” she said, raising her eyebrow. “So, you’re one of the famous Winchester brothers?”

Dean nodded, then downed his drink, observing Bela with a smirk. “The more handsome one. But Sam has got better hair,” he said, making her chuckle. “Y’know, it's kinda weird we haven't seen each other during the previous boat shows. If I remember correctly, the last time I was here, I met Mister Talbot. Very nice, older fella,” he said, raising his eyebrow.

“That would be my father. He passed the torch to me this year,” she said, smirking. “You and I are going to see each other more often, I suppose. Who would’ve thought that besides a pretty face, you had some serious skills,” she said, tilting her head to the side. “Actually, the rest of you is also quite pretty, if I remember correctly,” she added quietly, eyeing him up and down. “I was just wondering if you are up for refreshing my memory.”

Dean leaned against the table, crossing his arms. "Sorry, Bela. No can do,” he said, forcing his lips into a smile.

Bela looked slightly taken aback. “That’s quite a surprise. Did you get married or something?”

Dean briefly glanced at Castiel, then back at the girl. “Let's just say that I’m not in the mood.”

“Well, then,” she said, smirking again. “I’m not going anywhere if you change your mind,” she finished, then turned around and slowly walked the other way. Dean followed her with his gaze, then looked back at Cas, still talking with some people.

If Castiel came up here and said he wanted to have sex, Dean wouldn’t even hesitate. He was still a little scared of his first time with another man, but his poor heart simply wouldn’t stand saying ‘no’ to anything Cas would've wanted to do to him.

He had transformed into a lovesick fool by now, but he also couldn’t care less.

Cas was much more likely to spend the night in someone else's bed than with Dean, his brain supplied.

He winced, then shook his head. There was really no point in dwelling on that. He decided he should probably get the hell out of the stupid tent before someone else decided they absolutely needed to talk to him. Unconsciousness sounded truly incredible right now, tormented as he was by his own thoughts.

Dean turned around and directed his steps outside. He was greeted by the cool evening air. The nights started to get more chilly, indicating he should probably wear his warmer jacket more frequently. The sky above his head was filled with shining stars, but Dean didn’t pay them too much attention, focused on not breaking his damn leg on his way to the quay.

Ten minutes later, Dean finally managed to reach the sailboat. He quickly found his toiletries and a towel. The harbor master would probably be pretty surprised that he wanted to take a shower, but Dean didn’t really care.

Dressed in a clean T-shirt and sweatpants, with his hair still a little wet and his teeth freshly brushed, he went below the deck again. He wanted to jump straight under the covers, but he was stopped dead in his tracks by a person currently sitting by the table.

Cas observed him intensely with a steady gaze. To his right, stood the whole bottle of whisky, two glasses, and, to Dean’s utter horror, the present he had given Castiel on his birthday. Dean gulped, fear spreading quickly through his body.

“Hello, Dean,” Cas rumbled. “We need to talk.”

Chapter Text

It was quiet, except for the gentle splashing of the water and creaking of the fenders, as they rubbed against the quay boards. Cas, wearing a peculiar beige trench coat over his black tuxedo, looked calm and collected.

Dean frowned. “What are you doing here?”

“Waiting for you,” Cas replied evenly. “Could you sit down?”

Dean nodded, then slowly walked to the table and sat across from Cas, who reached for the bottle, pouring the whisky into the glasses. He handed Dean one drink, then took a sip from his glass and locked his steady gaze at Dean’s eyes.

“How are you, Dean?” He asked after a moment of silence.

“Peachy,” Dean grumbled, bringing the drink closer to himself. “How did you find me?”

Castiel smiled a little, then looked down at his hands. “I know you well enough to guess where you went when you saw one bed in our hotel room, Dean.”

“Yeah, okay,” Dean muttered, then sipped his whisky, trying to calm his nerves.

“Are you hiding from me?” Cas asked, searching his face again.

“No,” Dean replied, feeling his cheeks getting hot.

“I cannot shake the impression you did everything you could to avoid me today,” Cas said steadily. “You even stole your own things from the hotel room when I was in the bathroom.” Dean looked down at the table, trying to hide the massive blush forming on his face. Cas continued after a beat. “And you didn’t approach me at the party.”

“You seemed… busy,” Dean retorted, the picture of Meg hanging on Cas’s shoulder still pretty vivid in his head.

“If I recall correctly, you promised you wouldn’t abandon me during any social gatherings. I thought you’d come, but you seemed to be more interested in cheese and a blond girl,” Cas said, raising his eyebrow.

“I wasn’t interested in any girl,” Dean responded with a frown. Had Cas actually spotted him in all this crowd?

Cas tilted his head. “You are not denying the cheese part.”

Dean rolled his eyes at him. “Why does it sound like an interrogation, Cas?”

“My apologies,” Castiel said, smiling a little. “I’m just trying to understand what’s going on inside your head.”

“Yeah, good luck with that,” Dean chuckled bitterly, looking away.

Castiel observed him for a moment before he finally spoke again. “I came here to apologize to you, Dean. I should’ve done that sooner, but I couldn’t… track you down.”

Dean frowned. “What?” He asked, confused. “I thought you didn’t wanna talk to me anymore.”

Castiel gently shook his head. “On my birthday, I wanted to follow you through that door, but Balthazar stopped me. He said I should calm down first,” he smiled a little. “He was right; I was in no shape to talk. Later, when I realized what I had actually said to you, I knew I had to apologize,” Cas added, observing Dean's face. “You were absent from work, and you were not at your apartment. When I finally went to the marina, I saw that Baby was gone, too.”

“You were looking for me?” Dean asked, trying to make sense of it all. “But you left me this note, and you returned the keys,” he said quietly. “You didn’t even try to call.”

“I simply wanted to give you some space, Dean. I knew I had hurt you; I didn't want to overstep again. I wanted to talk to you in person, and I actually wanted to wait until you’re ready, but I guess I’m not very patient,” Cas said with a wince, then looked at the drink before him. “I was unfair to you and I said some hurtful things that I shouldn’t.”

Dean’s frown only deepened. “I’m the one who said things that I shouldn’t, Cas. You only told me the truth.”

Cas looked back up, his eyes incredibly sad. “I was afraid you would say that,” he murmured, observing Dean.

“You were actually right about many things, man. I’m not surprised you said what you said,” Dean stated, looking at his drink. “I, on the other hand, basically accused you of sleeping with your friend, like it was a bad thing to begin with. I mean, I’m not Benjamin’s biggest fan, but I had no right to say anything. It’s none of my business who you sleep with. I just saw him sitting beside you and uh… acting like a know-it-all and I… I lost my nerve,” he ended weakly. When he looked back up, he was met with Cas’s pained expression. 

“Dean, almost everything I said to you that night wasn’t true. I did it only because I got scared,” Cas stated, his voice laced with regret. “My life is changing very fast and I stupidly tried to put the blame for that on you. I shouldn’t have done that. I am truly sorry.”

“I am responsible for those changes. You wouldn’t move at all if I didn’t insist you came to visit me in the first place. I basically dragged you to Porto, Cas,” Dean retorted.

“The decision to move was my own, and as you accurately called it, it was an opportunity - not only to earn more money and stay at home with my son, but also to be closer to you,” Cas rumbled.

Dean’s eyes widened slightly, his heart fluttering in his chest. He wasn’t ready to admit it, but deep inside of his ribcage, he felt a faint flicker of hope.

Cas let out a sigh, his fingers nervously toying with the glass in front of him. “I should also apologize for the situation with Benjamin. He was actually very rude to you,” he said, then looked away. “Even if I’ve known him for a long time, It’s not an excuse to tolerate everything that he says. I shouldn’t have protected him. I’m sorry.”

Dean smirked. “Yeah, he’s a massive asshole.” Cas rolled his eyes at him. “What? He is,” Dean said with a shrug.

“He’s not that bad, but he behaved poorly.” Cas stopped, then shook his head, looking at his hands. “I’m not surprised you got so angry, Dean.”

Dean didn’t agree. Getting angry was easy, it always had been for him. He shouldn’t get praised for losing his shit.

“Cas, c’mon. I was a jerk to you,” he grumbled. “‘Sides, I’m really bad at… y’know… stuff that’s important,” he said, waving his hand in the air. “I really have no clue what I’m doing. You were right, this isn’t a game and I sure as hell don’t want to mess something up.”

Cas’s ocean eyes were transfixed on his. “Dean, I'm so sorry that my words made you feel this way. You are incredibly kind and good, and you have consistently shown it to me since the day we met. You’re not going to mess up anything,” he said softly.

“How do you know that? You've known me only for a few weeks, man, you said that yourself! I messed up with so many things before, why would it be different now?” Dean argued.

“Can you stop undermining yourself all the time?” Cas asked with a frown.

“Why?” Dean responded, frustrated. “You’re saying some stupid shit right now, and as your best friend, I should talk some sense to you!”

Castiel observed him for a moment like he was trying to solve a tricky puzzle. “You are trying to protect me even from yourself,” he finally muttered, tilting his head to the side. “I don’t want to be protected from you. I want you to let me in, Dean. You were willing to do it before my birthday.”

Dean shook his head, then looked away. Lots of things have changed since Cas's birthday.

Cas spoke again after a beat, “Dean, please. You are my best friend, too. I missed you terribly those past few days.”

Dean felt a pang in his chest. For the last couple of months, they had talked or texted each other almost every day. Their message thread, which had started back in June, was now filled with memes and pictures of random stuff one of them had wanted the other to see. Dean had grown accustomed to constantly keeping in touch with Cas, to the point where he'd almost forgotten a few times that he shouldn't send texts to him after their fight anymore. Cas's presence in his life had become something certain and permanent, and Dean didn't even consider that it could at some point end. 

He knew it wasn’t very smart to feel this way, but here they were. 

Dean met Cas's ocean eyes again. “I’ve missed you too, Cas,” he finally said, his voice a little raspy. 

Castiel smiled his little, private smile. Dean’s heart ached at the view.

They sat in silence for a moment until Cas looked to his right at the present that Dean had given him on his birthday. Dean took a sip of whisky again, trying to keep his hands occupied.

“When we fought, you told me that you made a mistake,” Cas said quietly. “At first, I wasn’t sure what you were referring to, exactly. You could imply that you didn’t want to involve yourself with another man, which wouldn’t actually be so strange. I was afraid that perhaps you might’ve had some doubts if this is truly what you wanted to try. But then I played this,” Castiel said, reaching for the small rectangle lying on the table.

It had probably been the cheesiest, dorkiest idea Dean had ever had. Since he wasn’t great at talking about feelings, he had decided to use someone else’s words. Of course, he had chosen Led Zeppelin, absolute masters of their craft. Dean's role had been limited to carefully handpicking the music from a whole bunch of incredible songs.

Obviously, he had started the mixtape with ‘The Rain Song’. 

He had just hoped that Cas would somehow understand.

But then, when the whole birthday party fiasco had happened, Dean had just followed the motion, pushing the present into Cas’s hands before he had actually thought it through.

Cas took the mixtape in his hand with a soft smile playing on his lips. “You recorded your favorite songs for me, starting with the one we listened to at the Wadden Sea. I know it wasn’t a coincidence,” he said quietly, glancing at Dean, who was fighting with a blush. Cas turned the mixtape in his fingers. “Correct me if I’m wrong, but I think you wouldn’t have given me such a present if you didn’t want to have anything to do with me.”

Dean ran a hand across his face, then looked at the table, embarrassed. He wanted to have everything to do with Cas, but he wasn’t going to straight up admit it.

Castiel spoke again after a moment. “As I said before, I am not great with people, Dean, I never have been. I often experience trouble with understanding certain behaviors.” He stopped, then narrowed his eyes. ”However, I believe that when it comes to you, I read the situation quite correctly.”

Dean didn’t move. He also probably stopped breathing.

“The mistake you were referring to… is connected to your self-doubt, isn’t it?” Cas asked quietly after a beat. “You actually thought that you were not good enough for me. For us.”

Dean looked away, unable to stand the softness in Cas’s gaze. It felt like his eyes bore deep into Dean’s soul, drawing out all the secrets and fears that Dean didn't want to deal with.

“I hope you understand that this is absurd to me, Dean. It never even crossed my mind that you could think something like that about yourself,” Cas added, raising his eyebrow.

The silence between them stretched uncomfortably to the point where Dean started fidgeting in his seat under Cas’s steady gaze. He knew Castiel was waiting for him to speak, but Dean wasn’t even sure what to say. Of course he wasn’t good enough for Cas or Jack, but he had a suspicion that saying it out loud would end in another pointless argument between them.

“Listen, man,” Dean finally muttered. “I only recently discovered that I’m not straight. I am very out of my depth here. And you… you seem to be like, I don’t know… experienced. And there is Jack, and he needs stability and all that, and I’m just… some guy. With… with issues,” Dean ended weakly.

A smile flickered on Cas’s face. “I believe that you completely ignore your own worth, Dean Winchester,” he said, observing Dean closely. “You are very smart and incredibly funny. You have a kind heart and a beautiful soul. You are sensitive and truthful and everything you do has a meaning. You have to admit, ‘a guy with issues’ doesn’t really cover it all, does it?” He ended, raising his eyebrow at Dean. 

Dean let out a chuckle, but it sounded hollow. “I’m no good, man,” he said, looking away. 

Castiel sighed, then put the mixtape on the table between them, getting Dean’s attention again. “Alright. I want to date you, anyway,” he said calmly.

Dean blinked. “What?”

Castiel observed him for a moment, then repeated, “I want to date you, Dean. I don’t care when exactly you figured out your sexuality, or that you think you have issues. I won’t say that it’s not important, because it is, and I would like to talk about it more. When you’re ready, of course.”

“You can’t be serious,” Dean argued.

Castiel looked him in the eyes with his soul-searching gaze. “Dean, I need you to understand that everything that happened between us is… very important to me. You are very important to me. When you assumed I had simply gotten bored and wanted to have some fun with you, you couldn’t be further from the truth,” he said with a serious expression. “I do find you extremely attractive,” Cas added quietly, glancing at Dean’s lips for a moment before meeting his eyes again, ”very hard to resist, actually, but my attraction to you is far from the most important factor here.”

Dean’s breath hitched, and his mouth parted. He couldn’t quite believe what was happening anymore. “You are serious,” he finally mumbled more to himself than Castiel. “But I fucked up so many of my previous relationships simply by being myself,” he reasoned. “And you… you are like, kind and collected and uh… you know… stupidly handsome. Just look around, man, you’re a friggin’ superstar here! People throw themselves at you, hoping that you will pay any attention to them,” Dean said with a frown. In the back of his head, he knew that he was doing the exact opposite of what he probably should be doing right now, which was accepting whatever Castiel was offering, but Dean couldn’t seem to stop himself.

Cas narrowed his eyes at him again. “I don’t care about other people.”

“What?” 

“I said I don’t care, Dean. I still want to date you,” Cas repeated stubbornly.

Dean felt his thoughts scramble like a mess of wires. He stared at Cas blankly for a moment, trying to make sense of it all. Apparently, Castiel wanted to give it a go. 

With Dean.

This is big, he thought. It was also very hard to believe, but Cas’s earnest eyes indicated that he was serious.

“There is, however, one more thing you should know before you decide if you are interested in, well, me,” Cas spoke after a moment, looking at the glass before him.

Dean’s heart was hammering in his chest. “Okay?”

“I don’t normally do dating,” Cas said, looking back up.

“You don’t do dating,” Dean repeated dumbly.

Castiel nodded. Dean studied his face for a moment, puzzled. “How did you start any relationship, then?”

“I didn’t. I have never been into one.”

Dean’s jaw dropped. He remembered what Gabe had said about Castiel’s past commitments, but Dean thought he had simply exaggerated. “Dude, how is that even possible?”

“I just found it more reasonable. No… drama,” Castiel said, looking down.

“This is nuts,” Dean muttered, then frowned. “But you told me that you had a partner when we were in the Kiel Canal, remember?”

Castiel nodded again. “I remember. I referred to a sexual partner.”

Dean looked at him blankly, then finally spoke again, “You wanna tell me you’re like a… a dating virgin?”

Cas gave him an unimpressed look. “If you must name it, then I guess you’re correct.”

“And you are actually willing to change that? With me?” Dean asked, making sure he’d got that part right.

Cas sighed. “Yes,” he admitted, then sent Dean a small, shy smile.

What a fucking asshole Dean’s brain actually was, leaving him completely alone in a moment like that.

Fortunately, it wasn’t like Dean had to think very hard about what to do here. As broken and scared as he was, he doubted he would ever forgive himself if he didn’t at least try to make it work. It sounded a little like the blind leading the blind, with Cas’s non-existent dating knowledge and Dean’s fucked up head, but some risks were just worth it, end of story. If Cas was willing, Dean would do everything in his power to keep up with him. 

As simple as that.

He finally let a smile bloom on his face. “Damn,” he said. “That sure as hell wasn’t the way I saw tonight going,” he murmured, downing his drink and looking at Castiel. “I would have to be very stupid to say no to you, sweetheart."

Cas’s eyes started to gleam in the gentle cabin light, his lips slowly curving upward. For a moment, none of them moved, too busy studying each other's faces.

Cas broke the silence first. “I’m not sure what to do now,” he admitted with a chuckle.

Dean’s grin widened. “We could give it a test drive,” he said. “C’mon, I know a nice place, not so far away. Let me just put on something warmer and we can go.”

Cas raised his eyebrow at him. “Now?”

“There's no time like the present, sunshine.” Dean winked at him, then stood up and grabbed his hoodie, putting it hastily on. Cas looked a bit unsure, but he obediently stood up as well, tucking the mixtape inside of his trench coat.

Dean looked around and after a moment's thought, he took the whisky bottle, hiding it in his pocket. “Ready, Cas?” He asked, taking Castiel's hand in his.

Castiel glanced down briefly, then met Dean's gaze with a small smile playing at the corners of his lips. "I think so," he slowly replied.

“Don’t worry, I’m not gonna bite,” Dean reassured him, then leaned in a little closer. “Unless you want me to,” he added with a playful wink. He was aiming to loosen the atmosphere, and judging by Cas’s wide smile, he somehow succeeded.

Finally, Dean turned around and guided Castiel outside, grinning widely. 

“Oh, Clarence!” they suddenly heard from their left. It was Meg, still in her party dress and high heels, wobbling in their direction through the quay. “There you are! I couldn’t find you anywhere,” she said, then glanced down at their joined hands with a frown.

Dean smirked. “Sorry, Meg, we’re kinda in a hurry here. I’m taking Cas on a first date,” he announced, feeling Castiel's quiet sigh behind him. When he glanced in Cas’s direction, he saw him gently shaking his head. Dean shrugged, then let go of Cas’s hand and stepped on the quay, careful to not fall into the water. Then, he turned around to assist Castiel off the boat as well. Cas looked at him with an amused glint in his eyes. 

“C’mon, humor me,” Dean urged playfully. Cas rolled his eyes, but finally accepted Dean's outstretched hand with a small smirk.

They didn’t look back at Meg once.

Soon, they moved away from the harbor, Castiel quietly following Dean through the alleys of La Rochelle, still holding his hand tightly.

“Dean, where exactly are we going?” He asked curiously a few minutes later.

“You’ll see soon enough,” Dean answered, then looked at Cas. “Are you nervous?”

“A little,” Cas admitted.

“Don’t be. A date is supposed to be fun.”

Cas observed him for a moment. “Are you nervous?”

“Yeah,” Dean said, wincing. Cas snorted beside him. 

They remained silent for the next few minutes as Dean guided Castiel through the night. Soon, he spotted a small path between the trees. Cas followed him until they reached the rocky ocean coast.

Dean had discovered this secluded spot three years ago with some chick he had met during the boat show. It was quite romantic, offering the opportunity to observe stars and share some nice kisses without any interruptions.

“This is beautiful,” Cas murmured in awe. The starry sky was stretching infinitely above their heads.

Dean smiled, then sat on the ground and pulled on Cas’s hand, urging him to sit down too. When Cas nestled beside him, Dean pulled out the whisky and took a swig, then passed the bottle to Castiel.

“What are the rules?” Cas asked after a beat.

Dean raised an eyebrow at him. “Of dating?” Castiel nodded beside him. “I mean, we can kinda make our own, but the general idea is to get to know each other, I guess,” he said, thinking. “The most important part is that we don’t do things we’re not comfortable with.”

Castiel hummed. “It sounds simple enough.”

“Well, it’s not rocket science, but when you meet someone you don’t really like, it’s not so nice anymore, y’know?”

Castiel glanced at Dean. “Do you have such experiences?”

“Sure I have,” Dean chuckled, taking Cas's hand in his and intertwining their fingers.

The night was peaceful and bright. Dean listened to the steady waves washing the shore and searched the gleaming dots above them. It appeared the Boötes constellation wasn't visible at the moment, but he could easily spot the Ursa Major near the horizon. 

Cas quietly observed the sky beside him for a while, then took a sip of whisky and placed the bottle between them.

“I’m sorry I didn’t sing happy birthday to you,” Dean spoke quietly a few moments later. 

Cas hummed beside him. “I’ll let it slide, this time.”

“You shouldn’t. I’m pretty sure you should actually make a scene and shout at me.”

Cas snorted. “Thank you for this important dating knowledge Dean. I'll make sure to properly use it in the future.”

“Anytime,” Dean said with a smirk, then tilted his head slightly, glancing curiously at Cas’s torso. “Where did you get the trench coat from?” 

Cas looked at him with a frown, then looked down at his chest. “You don’t like it?” He asked sadly.

Dean shook his head with a smile. “It’s great, Cas,” he responded. Castiel could literally wear a potato sack and still look good in it. Cas looked away shyly, smiling a little. Dean’s heart melted in his chest.

“I wanted to thank you again for helping Jack back at school,” Cas said quietly after a beat. “You managed to calm him down and provide the comfort he needed,” he added, gently rubbing his thumb over Dean's hand.

“No problem, man. He didn’t deserve such treatment from his teacher. And this lady was kinda crazy.”

“I should learn to listen to him more. He told me he hates Miss Hannah, I just decided to ignore him for no good reason,” Cas admitted, then shifted his head, glancing at Dean. “And you told me he doesn’t have to like everybody and I didn’t listen to you either. I’m really sorry.”

Dean sighed. “I honestly forgot about it. We all make mistakes. I would know, I made plenty of those lately,” he muttered. ”You changed your whole life in a mere few weeks and I didn't even ask how you are holding up. Very shitty for a best friend, don't you think?”

Cas shook his head slightly. “We had a serious fight. I didn't expect you to behave like nothing happened,” he said, then added, “but I hoped we would talk sooner.”

“Yeah, I ran, I get it,” Dean muttered, reaching for whisky beside him with his free hand.

Cas observed him for a moment, then looked at the sky again. “I believe you had your reasons. I just hope you would be willing to talk about it, someday.”

Dean smiled a little and nodded, taking a sip from the bottle. Shit, it was really scary how Cas just began to see what was going on inside of Dean's head. He cleared his throat. “So, I heard from Sam you went back to Sweden to sell your apartment.”

“Yes, fortunately, it was quick.”

“That’s good,” Dean said. “And how is Porto treating you?”

Cas's smile turned a little sad. “I found a park near my house,” he murmured after a beat. “It's full of birds and trees. I went there to think a few times.” He stopped, glancing at Dean. “To be honest, it was stressful without you. But the job is okay so far, the employees are really nice. I met with Sam for lunch a few times. I think we somehow became friends,” he chuckled softly. “As for the rest, Gabriel and Benjamin helped us settle into the new apartment. I haven't managed to do anything else yet.”

Dean felt a pang of guilt surging through him and flooding his insides. “Shit. I really left you alone in all that, didn't I?”

“You're here now, Dean,” said Cas quietly. “I'm going to be fine. I only ask you to not shut me down the next time we fight. Arguments are pretty normal, even among friends.”

“Yeah well, not a fan,” Dean chuckled.

“I know, but we need to communicate a little better, even when we're angry at each other.”

“God, you sound so mature.”

Cas grinned at him. “I am mature.”

Dean nodded solemnly. “Good. Somebody has to and it ain’t gonna be me.”

Castiel snorted, his deep laugh spreading into the silence around them. 

“So, how do you like your first date so far?” Dean asked after a moment.

“It’s not very different from what we usually do,” Cas pointed out with a smirk, then took a bottle from Dean’s hand and took a swig.

“Yeah,” Dean chuckled. “I guess that sometimes happens when you start dating your best friend,” he mumbled. “But there's an easy way to change that, y’know?” He added, turning his head to look at Cas, searching his face. Castiel appeared calm, smiling softly at him. Dean interpreted it as a good sign and began to lean in slowly, focusing on Cas's plush lips. He was very curious how exactly they would taste.

He'd never kissed a man before, he thought, but it couldn’t be much different from kissing a girl, could it? Sure, the stubble was something new, but Dean imagined it might add a bit of spice to the experience. He felt Cas's stormy scent gradually filling his senses.

Before he could finally close the distance between them, Cas gently stopped him with his hand.

“Wait,” Cas whispered in the confined space, his palm spread on Dean’s torso.

Dean felt a new wave of fear overwhelming him from the inside. “What… what is it?” He asked, his voice a little hoarse.

“Don’t get me wrong, I really want to kiss you, Dean. I wanted to for quite some time now.” Cas fixed his gaze on Dean’s lips for a second. “But to be fair, my previous… experiences were rather rushed,” he added, wincing a little. “It might sound ridiculous to you, but I want to do this right. I don’t want to rush anything between us,” he murmured, searching Dean's face. “Do you think we could… at least try to take things slow?”

Dean smiled at him. “Sure we can, sweetheart. Whatever makes you comfortable,” he said, then put his free arm around Cas and pulled him close.

And to think that merely two hours ago, Dean had been miserable and unsure whether Cas would even want to speak with him again, he thought, putting his cheek on Cas’s head and closing his eyes. 

He didn’t really care about the pace at which they would be moving forward. It didn’t matter, if Cas really wanted to give this a shot. Dean would give the guy the full dating experience - flowers, wine, and sweet kisses under the moonlight - as long as Cas would allow such indecency, of course. 

Dean could wait for the rest of his life if it only meant he was the one Cas wanted to be with in the end.

There was, quite obviously, still an issue of Dean’s very jumpy, very big feelings for Castiel that he had finally admitted to himself not so long ago. And to Sam. And to Charlie. Dean winced in the dark, opening his eyes. He had to talk to them, and do it soon, before one of them had a chance to blab about it to Castiel. The guy had just announced he wanted to take things slow, so dropping the L-bomb on him was the last thing that should happen. Dean had to make sure to keep a lid on it and let it all unfold properly.

They sat like this for a while, enjoying each other’s company and the beauty of the starry sky above them. Dean basked in Cas’s calming scent, while Cas gradually relaxed in his embrace.

“Dean?” Cas asked after a moment. 

“Yeah?”

“I think I like dating.”

“Good,” Dean chuckled, hugging Cas a little closer to himself. 

He wanted to sit there, with Cas beneath the canopy of stars, for all eternity, he decided.

Unfortunately, it turned out impossible since after some time, Dean’s ass started to hurt from sitting on the hard rocks. Soon, they stood up and started walking back to the marina slowly, hand in hand. 

When they reached the quay a few minutes later, Cas stopped in front of the boat and looked at Dean with a soft smile.

“Thank you for our date, Dean,” he said, then leaned forward, kissing Dean on the cheek. It was a very sweet, closed-mouth smooch, but still, Dean’s heart beat a little bit faster.

“Yeah, don’t mention it,” Dean responded, looking at their joined hands. “Have a good night, Cas,” he said as he started to pull away, but he didn't manage to go far before Castiel stopped him.

“I actually wanted to ask if you don’t want to come to the hotel room,” Cas said, pulling Dean back closer. “The bed is big enough for the two of us to sleep comfortably. We did sleep on your couch together, so as long as we will be actually sleeping,” he added, seeing Dean’s mischievous smirk, “I believe it won’t be a problem.”

“Damn,” Dean said, his grin widening. “Alright, I’ll try my best to keep my hands to myself.”

Cas chuckled, shaking his head. “I don’t want us to refrain from staying close to each other, Dean. I find sleeping near you extremely pleasant and relaxing.”

“I’m just teasing, Cas. Cuddling with you in bed sounds great to me, no funny business. Let me just grab my stuff from the boat,” Dean said, finally letting go of Cas’s hand.

When they reached the hotel lobby ten minutes later, it turned out to be rather deserted, except for the receptionist observing them from her desk. Castiel said something in French to her, then led Dean toward the elevator. 

How much everything had changed since his last visit in this very building, was truly beyond Dean. If not for the grounding touch of Cas’s warm hand, he would be sure it was all just a dream.

Once in their room, Cas walked straight to his duffel bag while Dean put his own on the chair and took a moment to actually look around. He hadn't paid much attention to the space before, aside from noting the large bed in the center. Now he could say that the room was incredibly ugly. The carpet was pale orange, mirroring the walls and drapes. There was a small TV in the corner, and a quite disturbing set of furniture to complete the horrible look.

Dean’s attention shifted back to Cas as he began to strip from his tuxedo. Hastily shedding his own sweatpants and hoodie, Dean settled into bed, enjoying the show. He hadn’t seen Castiel’s tattoo for a while, so he let himself openly admire it once Cas hung his clothes on a hanger.

“Man, it’s so big. Did it actually hurt when you made it?” Dean asked when Cas got under the covers with him. To Dean’s delight, he'd chosen not to wear a T-shirt.

“Some part of it did,” Cas admitted, arranging the pillow to his liking.

“Can I touch it?”

Cas finally lay down and nodded, smiling softly, then turned away from Dean, showing him his back. From up close, the black wings looked even more stunning. Dean hesitated only for a second before gently tracing his fingers along the lines of the tattoo. Cas's skin felt warm under his touch. Dean started from the bottom and climbed up, focusing on every feather along the way. When he got close to Cas’s neck, he saw goosebumps traveling down his arm and heard a soft groan escaping Cas’s throat. 

Dean was absolutely mesmerized.

“I wanted to do it for so long,” he whispered, stroking the feathers on Cas’s left arm.

“Dean,” Cas murmured, out of breath, then started to slowly turn back. Dean wanted to protest, but Castiel grasped his palm and squeezed it gently. “Let’s get some rest before I lose my mind here,” he said, his voice a little raspy. Dean noticed a slight flush on Cas's face, and there was a newfound spark in his eyes that hadn't been there before.

“Alright,” he finally said, observing Cas’s soft smile. “You sound hot when you speak French, y’know?”

Cas chuckled. “I believe this information may come in handy.”

“Yeah, don’t overdo it, cowboy. I’m not immune to your charm, y’know.”

“Of course. Go to sleep, mon ciel étoilé,” Cas murmured, then tenderly kissed Dean’s knuckles.

“Tease,” Dean muttered. “At least tell me what it means.”

Cas's smile widened. “Good night, Dean.”

Dean sighed. “Night, Cas.”

He couldn’t stop smiling until he finally fell asleep.

+

The irritating sound of knocking on their door woke Dean from a pleasant sleep. He didn’t want to open his eyes just yet, surrounded by a calming scent and pleasant warmth. He decided to ignore whoever tried to haunt him at this ungodly hour.

A moment later, the knocking was repeated, as if the person at the other side of the door was getting impatient.

Dean opened one eye. He was lying on his side, but he soon discovered he couldn’t move quite freely, restricted by the warm, tight embrace of someone’s heavy arms.

Right. Cas was there, in bed, with him. He was still sleeping - Dean could feel Cas’s steady breaths on his neck.

He felt suddenly overwhelmed by a wave of happiness as the memories of last night came flooding back to him. They had really gone on a date, it hadn't been a dream.

The knocking increased in intensity.

“Christ,” Dean grumbled, then slowly disentangled himself from Cas’s arms and stood up, emerging from under the warm blanket. He walked to the door and opened it, rubbing his eyes. 

On the other side, he found Kevin, Ed, and Harry. All of them looked spooked.

“Why are you here?” Dean asked, frowning.

“It’s almost eleven, boss, and you didn’t pick your phone up,” Harry said, glancing at Ed. 

“We thought you were dead,” Ed helpfully supplied. “Or that you were getting laid.”

“Mr. Castiel didn’t show up at the quay, either. We don’t know where he is,” Kevin added.

Dean crossed his arms and smirked. “Well, Cas is still asleep,” he said, pointing at the bed with his thumb.

“You were getting laid,” Ed mumbled under his breath, glancing over Dean’s shoulder.

“Shit, I owe Charlie 20 euros,” Harry added, wincing.

Dean frowned. “Did she actually bet on that with you?” He asked Harry in disbelief. “I’m going to kill her,” he added after Harry confirmed his suspicions with a nod. “How did you end up agreeing on this, anyway?” 

“She is very persuasive.”

Dean sighed, then ran a hand across his face. “Okay, I’m gonna wake Cas up and we’ll join you at the stand in a few. Go back to the boats, and for fuck's sake, don’t leave them unattended, guys,” Dean grumbled.

When the group finally walked away, Dean closed the door and glanced at his watch. It was, indeed, almost 11 in the morning. He yawned, shaking his head, then walked back to the bed and sat down. Cas, per usual, didn’t move even one muscle. Dean smiled softly, observing his face. Suddenly, Cas grimaced, scrunching his nose as if something deeply displeased him. Before Dean could react in any way, Cas, with his eyes still closed, grabbed him by the waist and pulled him back under the covers, maneuvering Dean into his arms.

“What the…” Dean started, but Cas silenced him with a dissatisfied groan. He didn't seem to be happy with their position until he pressed his chest to Dean's back and snuggled into his hair, successfully locking Dean between his arms again. Finally, he sighed, clearly content. All of the maneuvers seemed almost effortless for Cas like Dean’s sorry ass weighed nothing.

Dean snorted, getting a frustrated groan in return. “Cas,” he said softly. “We’ve gotta get up, buddy. It’s getting pretty late.”

He didn’t have to wait long for a response. 

“Call me a ‘buddy’ one more time, Dean Winchester, and I’ll make sure you will regret it,” Cas rumbled from behind him.

“Yeah, got it,” Dean quickly mumbled. 

Cas chuckled softly, then pressed a warm kiss to Dean’s neck. “Good,” he whispered to Dean’s ear, his voice sending a shiver down Dean's spine. Dean's lips parted, barely suppressing the moan that threatened to escape his throat.

God, what this man was even doing to him?

“How did you sleep?” Cas asked while Dean was still battling his body to calm the fuck down.

“Great,” Dean admitted with a slightly strained voice. “You?”

Instead of responding right away, Cas purred, then slowly pulled himself away from Dean, stretching his spine. Dean curiously turned his head, meeting Cas's content gaze.

“I haven’t slept this good in weeks,” Cas admitted with a lazy smile, while Dean fully faced him. “I don't want to move anywhere today,” he added. His blue eyes were almost glowing in the morning sun, shining through the hotel windows.

Dean smiled back at him. “Neither do I,” he responded, watching Cas's hair, lovely tousled in every possible direction. “Maybe we could just lock the door and stay here?”

Cas’s smile widened. “We can’t leave everything to Ed and Harry. They will probably set your boats on fire,” he said, raising his eyebrow. Dean had to admit the concern wasn’t exactly unfounded. Harry had actually had an incident involving fire and paint back in Porto, so he could do something stupid again.

Dean groaned, but finally nodded and slowly propped up on his elbows. Meanwhile, Castiel pulled himself up and sat on the bed, resting his head on the wall behind them.

“I would kill for a coffee,” he muttered, closing his eyes. “With oat milk.”

Dean frowned. “You drink it with oat milk? Why didn’t you tell me?”

“I didn’t want to cause any more problems,” Cas said, glancing back at Dean, his expression sheepish.

“Cas, c’mon, what are you even talking about?” Dean asked, amused. “Here’s an idea. I’ll go and find us some coffee, while you’ll make sure that Ed and Harry won’t actually drown Kevin. How does that sound?”

Cas sighed softly with a warm look on his face. It was truly a shame Dean wasn’t allowed to just sit there and admire his face for the whole day.

Such a waste, he thought, then finally pulled himself up from the bed and started preparing for the day, Cas following suit shortly after.

Once Dean put a clean T-shirt and pants on, he heard Cas leaving the bathroom. When he turned around, he saw that Castiel was now wearing only his dark blue jeans. Dean eyed him up, appreciating the play of muscles under the tanned skin. 

“Hey, did you get this gym membership yet?” He finally asked, analyzing the shape of Cas's triceps.

“No, I didn't have time for that,” Cas replied, pulling a black sweater out of his bag.

“Good, I want you to go to the same one as me. I need a spotter,” Dean said with a smirk, then reached for his company jacket and put it on.

Cas shot him an amused look before pulling the sweater over his head. “As you wish. Is it far from the office?” He asked. 

“Nah, it’s bearable,” Dean responded and walked to the bathroom, wondering how he could convince Cas to sleep in one bed with him every night. Obviously, he wasn’t gonna admit that to anyone, but he didn’t really imagine being the little spoon could be actually this nice. No wonder that all the girls he had slept with wanted to be held like that after sex, Dean thought while brushing his teeth.

When he was finally ready, Dean left the bathroom and tied his shoes. “Okay, see you in a moment on the quay,” he said soon after, then grabbed his wallet and phone on his way, ready to leave.

“Dean?” Cas’s voice stopped him before Dean had a chance to open the door. When he looked that way, he saw Cas right in front of him, leaning toward his face. Dean’s eyes went wide. Before he could comprehend what was even happening, he felt the warmth of Cas's lips on his cheek again.

“See you at the stand,” Castiel said, pulling himself away with a soft smile.

Dean left the room soon after, trying to contain the fluttering sensation in his chest and a stupid smile that stubbornly didn’t want to leave his face.

+

Once Dean managed to reach the quay with their coffees, Cas was already standing in front of the boats, talking with Kevin. He immediately smiled when he spotted Dean, then said something to the kid and approached the stand.

“There you go, oat milk latte. I had to actually sell my kidney to buy this,” Dean said, handing over the paper cup. Castiel grabbed it hastily, muttering a quick “thank you,” then started his ritual of inhaling the beverage right away.

Dean chuckled and turned to Ed, sitting by the table. “All in order?”

“Yeah, boss. Miss Talbot came here a few minutes ago, she was looking for you.”

“Huh,” Dean said, glancing at Cas, who was already observing him from behind the rim of his paper cup. Dean shot him a playful smirk, then shifted his focus back to Ed. "Alright. I'll handle her later. Go and take some pictures with Kev, so Sam wouldn’t bitch to me again that I am not interested in promoting the company on social media or whatever.”

When Ed and Kevin finally walked away, Dean leaned his ass on the table with flyers, his arms crossed, and studied the banner hanging in the back of the stand. Cas placed himself beside him, facing the other way.

“When did you even take those photos, man?” Dean asked with a smirk.

“Last week. Crowley wanted you to be there, too.”

Dean glanced at Cas. “I hate photoshoots.”

“He told me that much. But I believe he doesn’t care about your sentiments,” Cas retorted with a grin.

“Do you think I can hang it over my bed once the boat show is over?” Dean murmured, glancing back at the banner.

Cas snorted, shaking his head. “Where did you get the impression I would be interested in watching my face while spending time in your bedroom?”

Dean grinned. “Oh, so you are planning to spend some time in my bedroom?” He asked, turning his gaze at Cas again.

“Yes. And I hope you will visit mine, as well. I thought it was quite clear at this point.” Cas responded, narrowing his eyes.

Dean sighed, admiring Cas’s sharp jaw for a moment. It still didn’t sit right with him that Castiel had decided to move away from his apartment, even if he understood why Cas had done it. Dean hoped that over time he could somehow convince Castiel to move back and live with him again, but it was obviously too soon to bring that particular topic up.

“Clear as a bell,” Dean finally said, leaning a little forward. “You will tell me when the ‘just sleeping’ thing changes to ‘some other fun stuff’, right?”

Castiel looked at him with amusement. “It’s not that I don’t share your enthusiasm Dean, but I’m quite positive that you will actually benefit from taking things slow,” he said, then leaned to Dean’s ear, lowering his voice. “Have you ever been with a man before?”

Dean found it genuinely funny that the first person to ask him this question had been completely drunk Benny. However, the thought quickly vanished from his mind under Cas's intense gaze. Dean slowly shook his head.

Cas nodded. “More reasons to not hurry anything,” he murmured gently.

Dean frowned. “I’m not scared,” he stated, glancing between Cas’s earnest eyes. He was, in fact, a little scared, but he hoped his face wouldn’t give him away.

“I’m not implying that you are. I just want to make sure you will be comfortable with everything we do,” Cas whispered softly. When Dean opened his mouth to argue, Cas stopped him by placing a hand on his inner thigh. “When the time comes, I promise I’ll fuck you on your beautiful, ocean table until you can’t walk, if that’s what you want, Dean. Stop being so impatient,” he said, observing Dean’s cheeks quickly turning crimson red.

“Yeah, okay,” Dean managed to choke out, looking away. Cas chuckled beside him, then focused on the remaining coffee in his cup.

Not long after, the day got really busy. Plenty of clients came to their stand to chat and see the boats, so they eventually split and went about their separate tasks. Around 2 in the afternoon, Dean decided to order takeout for everyone, which proved to be much simpler with Castiel around, as he could actually read the French menu.

While enjoying his tofu stir-fry noodles beside Castiel, Dean spotted Bela casually strolling to their stand.

“Hey, stranger,” she greeted him, then curiously glanced at Cas standing next to Dean.

“Hey,” Dean said, then looked at Cas as well. “I believe you two haven't met yet. This is Castiel Novak, my associate.”

“Team Alinghi guy! Everybody seems to be gossiping about you,” Bela said with a smirk, extending her hand in greeting. “Bela Talbot.”

Cas shook her hand with a polite smile. “Nice to meet you. What are they gossiping about, exactly?”

“Oh, you know, the usual,” she responded, smiling. “But mainly, how did you end up with the Winchester brothers after disappearing from the face of Earth for so long.”

Castiel nodded, then glanced at Dean. “I was fortunate enough to meet Dean during his journey to the Baltic Sea. He helped me realize there are things I still wish to try,” he said, his eyes gleaming.

“Yes, well, Dean has this impact on people,” Bela said, raising her eyebrow at Dean. “I was actually hoping we could talk privately before the boat show ends? I thought we would see each other yesterday after the party, but you disappeared,” she added with a playful smirk.

Dean felt a heat creeping up his neck. Bela had every reason to assume he would be willing to have sex with her again, or that he was straight, for that matter. Obviously, that wasn’t the case here and Dean knew now was the time to handle it properly.

It didn’t help that Castiel was observing him calmly, undoubtedly curious how Dean would navigate the tricky situation.

Even if a little scared, Dean couldn’t afford to make more mistakes when it came to Cas, he finally thought, placing his free hand on Cas's waist. There was no way he was going to screw this up with his anxiety now, after they came this far.

“I’m sorry, Bela,” he said, glancing at Cas. “Me and Cas had a date,” he then stated, looking back at the girl before them.

Bela’s mouth slightly opened. She glanced between Dean and Cas, finally stopping her surprised gaze at Dean. “That’s unexpected,” she said. “I believe you didn’t mention your date yesterday when we talked at the party?” She asked with a sly smirk. 

Dean raised his eyebrow at her. “You’re right. That’s because it’s a quite recent development.”

Once the words came out of his mouth, he looked at Cas. He immediately knew he had done the right thing - Cas’s eyes were twinkling with affection and he was smiling softly.

“I see,” Bela said, then threw her hair back. “Congratulations, then,” she added with a strained smile.

“Thank you,” Cas said, his hand finding its place on Dean’s back, where he began tracing soothing circles. A gentle touch calmed Dean’s nerves a little.

Once Bela said her goodbyes soon after, and left them alone at the stand again, Dean sighed, relaxing his muscles. He looked back at Castiel, who was already observing him with awe in his eyes. 

“It was very brave, Dean."

“S’nothing,” Dean argued weakly.

“It’s not ‘nothing’. It wouldn't hurt to accept a compliment once in a while. Did you notice you started to actually shake?”

“I wasn’t shaking, Cas,” Dean mumbled.

“Of course not, Dean,” Cas sighed, amused for some reason.

+

Dean was out of sedatives. He hadn't realized it until it was too late and he was sitting next to Castiel in an airplane while the flight attendant showed them how to use a life jacket with a polite smile. 

He was sure he still had one pill left in his wallet, but he had searched it four times by now.

“What’s going on?” Cas asked him over his book.

“Shit,” Dean muttered, looking around. He started sweating.

“Dean,” Cas said with a frown, placing his hand on Dean’s knee. “Are you alright?” He asked, alarmed. Dean shook his head, glanced to their right at the emergency exit, then closed his eyes. They were locked in a flying, metal can and Dean was out of fucking sedatives. Meanwhile, the flight attendant ended the safety presentation and the plane started moving towards the runway. Dean’s head started to spin.

“Dean, are you… possibly afraid of flying?” He heard Cas’s voice to his right. He gulped, then nodded, too scared to open his eyes. 

“How exactly did you get here, then?” Castiel asked curiously.

“Heavily drugged, Cas,” Dean squeezed through his teeth. He could now hear the roar of the plane’s engines. They were going to take off. Dean was going to throw up.

Suddenly, Dean felt Cas’s hand on his head, pulling him to Cas’s warm chest. 

“You’re going to be okay, mon ciel étoilé. You’re safe,” Cas said quietly with his deep, deep voice right into Dean’s ear. He gently stroked Dean’s cheek with one hand, placing the other on his back. 

The hug wasn't entirely comfortable as they were both strapped into their seatbelts, but Dean’s heart rate started to gradually slow down. As he listened to Cas’s steady breathing, he felt calmer by the second. The outside world slowly drifted away from Dean’s consciousness, leaving only the feeling of Cas’s warm hand on his cheek. 

Dean suddenly realized the touch was familiar. He remembered the night at the harbor in Cuxhaven, all those weeks ago, when he had felt the exact same, tender touch just before he drifted to sleep. He smiled, inhaling the stormy scent, and listening to the soft nonsense Cas kept whispering straight to his ear.

The sound of the seatbelt sign being switched off brought Dean out of his lethargy. When he raised his head and opened his eyes, he realized they were already high in the air. He glanced at Cas, who observed him with a warm smile.

“Are you feeling better?” He asked, tilting his head to the side.

“Yeah,” Dean sighed. “Thanks,” he mumbled, slightly embarrassed.

Cas smiled softly in return, then grasped Dean's hand and focused back on his book.

Of course, he wouldn’t press Dean to explain the reason for his anxiety, and he would act like freaking out on a plane was a completely normal thing for a grown-up man to do. 

Dean smiled discreetly, glancing at their joined hands.

“Cas, what do the French words mean?” He asked quietly after a beat.

Castiel raised his head back up, then smiled shyly and looked away shaking his head.

Dean grinned at him.“C’mon, just tell me,” he said quietly, searching Cas’s face.

“I really don’t want to make you uncomfortable,” Cas admitted with a strained smile.

“Is it something dirty?” Dean asked with a playful smirk.

“No,” Cas chuckled, then sighed. “It means ‘my starry sky’,” he finally murmured, blushing slightly.

Dean felt a flush spread quickly across his face. He rubbed his forehead with his free hand and shifted in his seat, suddenly feeling extremely self-conscious under Castiel's blue gaze.

Cas had called him his starry sky. In French. How was this Dean’s life now?

Before he could decide what to do with all those overwhelming feelings accumulated inside of his chest, Cas tugged on his hand and placed Dean's head on his shoulder, kissing the top of Dean’s head. 

“Try to rest,” he said, focusing on his book again, narrowing his eyes slightly. It appeared to be Swedish, this time.

Dean listened to Cas’s breathing again. As his eyelids grew heavy, he realized he had to accept that he had no control over his heart. All of the vulnerability still seemed a little scary, but he didn’t want to run away anymore. For the first time in his life, Dean consciously decided to stay exactly where he was. 

He didn’t want to fight against the current anymore. He wanted to let it carry him wherever it may lead.

+

Dean was woken up some time later by a violent shake of the plane and the captain's voice telling them that if their oxygen masks fell out during the landing, they were to put them on. A baby cried loudly somewhere behind them, and Dean saw the flight attendant from before, sitting in her special seat in front of them, her seatbelts fastened. She didn’t look particularly relaxed. 

Dean felt instant panic rising inside him. He searched for Cas’s hand, then squeezed it hard, getting Cas’s attention. The plane shook violently again.

“You’re awake,” Cas said, cool as a cucumber. “We’re almost there,” he added, curiously glancing through the window, the psychopath.

The captain repeated that they shouldn’t worry about the oxygen masks. Some dude two rows over tried to stand up, but the flight attendant ordered him to sit back down. The baby behind them cried even louder.

“Why is he saying that we should put the bloody masks on for the third time?” Dean heard from the seat behind them. He felt sick.

It was undoubtedly the end. They were going to die, Dean decided, breathing fast. He knew that flying wasn’t natural, dammit. He could ride there, to the stupid boat show, instead of dying in a metal can in the air.

Dean was almost certain that Castiel was trying to talk to him, but he couldn't hear a word. In fact, all he could hear now was the loud ringing in his ears. He squeezed his eyes shut, praying for a peaceful death.

And perhaps his prayers were answered because the next thing Dean felt were warm lips pressing tightly to his. 

The first thing Dean realized was that they were very, very soft and smooth. The scent of storm, ozone, and swirling ocean surrounded him from every side, making him instantly forget about the world outside of his senses.

Then, Dean felt Cas’s hand on his cheek and the other one on his neck, pulling him a little closer to the heat. Even though the kiss was still sweet and simple, Dean shivered, feeling an overwhelming sense of euphoria - it felt as if it was his very first kiss all over again, not just one of many he had experienced before, with other people.

In a way, it was his first kiss, he thought, inhaling Cas’s intoxicating scent. For the very first time, Dean was actually in love with the person he was kissing, and it turned out to be a real game changer. Everything seemed heightened, as if someone had suddenly increased the saturation in a faded image. Luckily, his body decided to react faster than his brain, which seemed to have completely checked out at this point, leaving Dean giddy and a little dizzy. His hand shot forward, gently cupping Cas’s neck and tilting his head slightly, gaining better access. When he captured Cas's lower lip with his mouth, he heard a sweet moan escaping from Cas’s throat in response. Encouraged, Dean repeated the action with Cas’s upper lip, dragging the tip of his tongue over it this time. Cas’s breath hitched. He lazily chased Dean’s tongue with the tip of his own, then gently bit Dean's lower lip. Dean whimpered, mesmerized by the sensation. 

Filled with want and need, Dean decided to turn it up a notch, opening his mouth a little wider. As if waiting for permission, Castiel immediately slipped his tongue between Dean’s lips. The jolt of excitement ran through Dean, making his head spin. He moaned softly, pulling Cas’s face even closer and interweaving their tongues. His heart raced with desire for more, pumping blood to all the right places. It turned hot and wet very fast, so Dean’s dick obviously thought the next thing would be getting some action.

Unfortunately, it all ended too soon. When Cas pulled away, Dean found himself already yearning for more.

“You’re gonna give me a heart attack, I swear,” Dean mumbled breathlessly, glancing between Cas’s big eyes.

“I believe you were already having one,” Cas replied, tilting his head. “Are you alright, Dean?”

Dean nodded, trying to catch his breath. “What was that?”

“I wanted to help you relax,” Cas said calmly, looking at Dean’s lips, then back at his eyes.

Dean frowned. “Do you often help people relax like that?”

Cas shook his head. “No, it's just you,” he said. He studied Dean’s face for a moment longer, then turned his head to the right, at the flight attendant sitting in front of them. When Dean followed his gaze, he saw her already observing them with a shocked expression, eyes wide and mouth parted. She wasn’t the only one - in fact, it seemed they had actually caught the attention of almost everyone sitting nearby.

“I’m very sorry to interrupt,” the flight attendant said after a beat, “but could you possibly refrain from such activities until you are off the plane?” She asked with a strained smile.

“Of course,” Cas said, smiling politely. “Our apologies.”

Suddenly, they heard the sound of the seatbelt sign being switched off again. When Dean looked around, he realized they had actually landed and the plane had fully stopped. People instantly stood up, reaching for their hand luggage, forgetting about Dean and Cas’s PDA session altogether. It was a shame that Dean’s dick didn’t get the memo.

Dean tried to adjust himself slightly, but all he got in return was a knowing smirk from Cas.

“Okay Casanova, let’s get outta here,” Dean muttered, covering his crotch with a duffel bag on his way out. Castiel followed closely behind with a grin on his face.

Chapter Text

On Monday around noon, Dean spotted Charlie on her floor, talking to some chick from the IT department.

“Excuse me, I need to borrow her for a moment,” Dean said, hooking his elbow under Charlie’s and pulling her toward her office.

“Dean!” She yelped, startled. “I was in the middle of something!”

“It’s gonna be worth your time, I promise,” he said, shooting her a smirk over his shoulder. Her eyes immediately went wide.

“Oh my God,” she mumbled before a smile bloomed on her face. She clearly wanted to say more, but Dean silenced her with a pointed look. 

“Okay, spill,” she said the moment the door to her office shot behind them.

“How many people have you betted on my sexual life, Charlie Bradbury?” Dean asked, narrowing his eyes at her. 

“A… a few?” She said, suddenly looking uncomfortable. “I’m sorry, it’s like super easy money,” she whined. “They’re completely oblivious!”

“You’re unbelievable,” Dean muttered, crossing arms at his chest. “Now they sure as hell aren’t. The whole hangar thinks I’m sleeping with Cas now!”

Charlie frowned. “Wait, aren’t you? I thought you wanted to tell me that you two made up.”

“We did, just didn't have sex.”

Charlie covered her mouth with her hand and bounced in place with a happy squeal. Dean couldn’t help but crack a smile, unable to keep his serious face anymore. 

“Tell me everything!” She demanded, walking to the sofa and patting the seat beside her. “How did it happen?”

“I mean, we talked… we apologized to each other, and uh… he kinda told me he wants to try dating,” Dean said eloquently.

Charlie nodded after every bit of information Dean had provided. “Did you two kiss?” She asked impatiently when she realized Dean had stopped talking.

Dean felt a blush creeping up his neck. He cleared his throat, and then finally took a seat on the couch. “He kissed me,” he admitted, clasping his hands. Charlie squealed again. “But it happened only once when I was having a panic attack on the plane,” he added.

Charlie frowned. “A panic attack?”

“Yeah, but that’s not important. When I tried to kiss him before that, he told me he wanted to take things slow. And don’t get me wrong, I get that,” Dean quickly added, before Charlie could interfere, “I’m just not entirely sure what to do now. Like, can I kiss him? Should I forget the kiss happened?” Dean asked weakly, rubbing his neck.

“Well, you could certainly talk to him about it, Dean,” Charlie responded, raising her eyebrow. 

Dean winced. “We did the talking part already.”

Charlie snorted. “And you thought once it’s over, you won’t have to do it ever again?”

Dean shot her an annoyed look. “‘Course not. I’m just trying to wrap my head around the whole thing here,” Dean muttered. “He did those nice, little things, like he kissed me on the cheek, and it was sweet and all. But then he literally put his tongue in my throat. Like what that’s supposed to mean? I've got pretty mixed signals here,” Dean whined.

Charlie made a face at him. “Dude, too much info,” she chastened him. “You’ve gotta talk to him. There is no way around it when you are in a relationship.”

Relationship. 

Dean frowned. “He didn’t call me his boyfriend once, Charles. He only used the word ‘dating’,” he said, feeling his pulse rising.

Charlie looked at him with a strange expression. “Aren’t you overanalyzing stuff again, Dean?”

“I don’t think so,” he muttered, thinking. Castiel had explicitly said about wanting to date Dean. He'd repeated it a few times, even. Dean stupidly didn't ask about Cas's expectations, and he was too scared to do it now, when Cas had actually agreed to spend time with him. It wouldn't be strange if Castiel simply wanted to test the waters before committing himself to one person, especially since he had never been in a relationship before.

“I think we are not together, together yet,” Dean finally said. “I think I actually need to raise my game here." Castiel had given him a chance and Dean wasn't going to fuck it up. Even Balthazar had said that Dean should stop whining and get to work. “I’ve gotta think of the best spots for a romantic date. If I want this to work, I have to sweep him off his feet,” Dean added, looking back at Charlie.

“Well, I mean, there is no harm in taking him on a nice date, I guess,” she said, raising her eyebrow at him. “I know! We can go on a double date!” she added with wide eyes.

Dean winced. “Yeah, I don’t know about that-” he started, but Charlie silenced him with her gaze.

“Shut up, Winchester. I know what I’m doing. I’m not going to leave you at the mercy of your own mind.”

Dean frowned. He was actually sure Charlie had no idea what she was doing, but he decided to keep this information for himself, at least for now.

“We should go to a club,” she said excitedly. “You two didn’t have a chance to dance at the birthday party, and that’s unacceptable,” she added, shaking her head. “We are also long overdue for our game night, you should totally bring him along next time we meet!”

“I mean, I could ask him, but I want to bring Jack with us, too,” Dean said. He was a little worried that Jack might feel left out in all this dating situation going on, so he had planned to include the boy whenever possible. They still had some castles and caves to see, and with enough planning, it could all pass as dates with Cas.

Charlie’s smile widened. “Sure thing. Does the kid like board games?”

Dean nodded. He had a sneaking suspicion Jack would absolutely destroy Charlie in any kind of game.

“Alright, so it’s settled,” she said. “I can’t wait to see you two together!”

Dean looked at his hands. “Yeah, about that. He can’t know that I’m, y’know, in love with him, Charles. It’s too soon,” he said, shaking his head.

“Really, Dean? I would never say something like that to him. It's important to go at your own pace, dude," Charlie remarked, then glanced at her watch. “Shit, gotta go. Dorothy’s waiting for me with lunch.”

“Yeah, I should go, too. I’m meeting Sammy in a few minutes,” Dean said.

“Oh! What did he say about you and Cas?” She asked as they were leaving her office.

Dean winced. “Yeah, he doesn’t know yet. I didn’t exactly have a lot of time to inform everybody, y’know?”

“I bet you were busy thinking about Castiel,” Charlie teased him, jabbing her elbow at his side. “I can’t blame you, though. I’m actually surprised you managed to work today instead of daydreaming.”

Dean hummed. He had been totally daydreaming instead of working, but he wasn’t going to admit it to Charlie.

They parted a few moments later, when Dean stepped out of the elevator on his floor. As he made his way towards his office, he suddenly spotted Meg in the distance. She wore a gloomy expression on her face, and her brown hair looked a little messier than usual. She winced when she saw him.

“Not you again!” She whined.

Dean sent her a shit-eating grin. “Yeah, I'm working here, Chuckles. Just like you!”

She rolled her eyes. “Great. Well, I bet you're gloating right now,” she said flatly.

Dean assessed her for a moment, observing the bags under her reddened eyes. She looked like she hadn't had a wink of sleep. In fact, she looked very familiar, akin to Dean's own state from the day he and Cas had had a fight. He could quite clearly see the pain he had felt not so long ago burning in her gaze. 

“Nah,” Dean finally said, shaking his head, his smirk now gone. “If you feel even an ounce of what I felt those few weeks, I'm actually very sorry for you. Nobody deserves to feel that way,” he said truthfully.

Meg’s eyes widened a little as if Dean’s response caught her completely off guard. “Damn, you are good,” she muttered, looking away. Dean didn’t know how to respond, so he decided to stay silent. 

Finally, Meg sighed and looked back at him. “Be kind to him,” she said quietly, then walked away, leaving Dean standing in the middle of the gray, ugly carpet. 

“Yeah," he muttered to himself, then resumed his walk to his office.

He found Sam already sitting on the sofa inside, curiously glancing inside of the bag lying on the table. 

“I can see you found our lunch,” Dean said, closing the door behind him. “How is Lin?” he asked, moving to the chair.

“She is better, thanks,” Sam said, then raised his eyebrow. “How was… France?” He asked carefully.

Dean dove into the bag, pulling out vegan tortillas. “It was okay, I guess. I found out that I had accidentally slept with old Talbot’s daughter in June.”

Sam made a face at him. “And how did you manage to do that?”

“Do I really have to explain it to you? It just happened, end of story,” Dean muttered, passing one tortilla to Sam. “She actually wanted to do it again this weekend, but I told her I’m dating Cas now.”

Sam almost choked on his tortilla. “Perhaps you should lead with this information, Dean?” His brother managed to say when he finally stopped coughing.

Dean smirked. “Yeah, my bad.”

“You’re such an asshole, I swear,” Sammy muttered. “It’s a blessing that you can cook, at least,” he added, taking another bite of his food.

“It’s good, right? I’m gonna drop one to Cas later,” Dean said, then took a bite of his food as well.

“So, you two talked?” Sam asked a moment later. Dean nodded, chewing. “And you’re good now?” Sam asked again.

“Yeah,” Dean said when he swallowed.

“Great. We moved the family dinner to tomorrow, so you could actually be there this time. I’m going to invite Cas and Jack, too. Charlie can’t make it this time, though.”

Dean nodded, stuffing the tortilla into his mouth. All the family plans were leaving less and less time for their dates, he thought. There was no way that Cas would want to call him his boyfriend anytime soon if the only places they went to were family dinners and game nights. He would have to figure out when to organize a date that would actually be romantic. 

Dean looked back at his brother. “Listen, you can’t blab to him about the L-bomb, Samantha,” he said after a beat, raising his eyebrow.

Sam looked at him strangely. “What did you actually talk with him about then?”

Dean rolled his eyes. “It’s none of your concern. All you need to know is that we’re good, we’re dating and all is great.”

Sam huffed, then shook his head. “Alright,” he said, then finished his tortilla. 

Once Sam was gone, Dean took the last tortilla and directed his footsteps on the floor below, to Cas’s office. He was humming ‘Immigrant Song’ to himself when he suddenly spotted movement to his left. Once he looked that way, he saw the lawyer Ishim and Cas, walking side by side, discussing something. Cas wasn’t wearing a full suit today; instead, he had opted for a semi-formal, dark green jacket paired with gray jeans. Meanwhile, Ishim was impeccably dressed in a carefully tailored and undoubtedly expensive suit. They didn’t seem to notice Dean. 

He stopped, observing as both of them approached Cas’s office and Ishhim opened the door for Castiel. Cas smiled politely and stepped into the room. Isshim followed him, closing the door behind them.

They didn’t do anything that could make Dean jealous, really. It was quite normal, office behavior and Castiel was at work. But Dean was nothing if not one, insecure sonofabitch, so his chest tightened a little at the view, anyway. 

He decided to act like an adult for once, resuming his walk to Cas’s office. As he reached the door, he knocked three times, then stepped into the room once he heard Cas’s deep voice from inside.

Castiel was sitting behind his desk, squinting at his monitor, while Ishim sat at the chair in front of him. When Cas looked up at Dean from his computer, his face lit up with a soft smile.

“Hiya, Cas,” Dean said with a grin.

“Hello, Dean,” Cas responded, then looked at Ishim. “Do you remember-”

“Ishim, yeah. How could I forget?” Dean asked, approaching the guy with a smile plastered on his face.

“Dean Winchester,” the asshole said, extending his hand with an artificial smile of his own. 

Dean shook it, then looked back at Cas. “I brought you a tortilla,” he said, awkwardly placing the wrapped food on his desk. “So you wouldn’t be hungry,” he added, like it wasn’t clear enough.

Cas’s eyes widened slightly. “Thank you, Dean,” he said quietly.

Ishim cleared his throat. “We’ve actually just grabbed lunch, Mr. Winchester,” he said, looking up from his chair. 

Dean glared at him. Would the world really miss the asshole lawyer if Dean just strangled him?

“I’ll eat it later. I’m sure it’s incredibly tasty,” a deep voice drew Dean’s attention back to Cas. “I actually wanted to ask you if you have time after work today. I’d like to invite you over for dinner,” Cas added.

Dean nodded with a small smile. “Sounds great,” he said, then briefly glanced at Ishim. “I'll leave you to your work,” he added, then sent Castiel a wink. He could swear that Ishim finally stopped smirking so smugly.

+

“Dean!” Jack yelled the moment the door to Cas’s apartment shut behind him. The boy threw himself at him, hugging Dean tightly with a wide smile on his face.

“Hiya, bud,” Dean said with a slightly strained voice, returning the hug with one hand and moving the other to the side. 

They stood like that for a few moments. After a while, Dean noticed Cas's face peeking out from the hallway corner with a fond smile. Dean smiled back at him but didn't pull away from Jack just yet. The kid needed the hug probably just as much as Dean did.

When Jack finally let go, he curiously glanced at Dean's other hand, in which he still held a potted flower that he desperately tried not to squish.

“I brought it for you guys, it's supposed to be quite easy to maintain, and the name’s cool,” he said, handing the plant to Castiel. “It's called the ‘Gollum Jade’.”

Cas's smile widened as he turned the succulent a few times, observing its green, slender leaves from every angle, then looked back at Dean.

“I love it. Thank you,” Cas said, then planted a sweet, small kiss on Dean’s cheek, causing Dean's heart to skip a beat. “I need a few more minutes in the kitchen,” Cas added, then turned to his son. “Jack, could you show Dean around?” he asked and disappeared with his new plant when the boy nodded.

Dean glanced at the kid's wide smile. “So I guess your dad told you this already, but we're kinda dating now,” he said, stripping off his jacket and taking his shoes off.

“He did. I'm very happy,” Jack stated. “I was tired of your fight, it was stupid. C'mon, let me show you my room,” he added, tugging on the sleeve of Dean's green flannel shirt. Dean chuckled but obediently followed the kid.

The apartment was spacious and bright, full of light furniture and cozy vibes. Jack led Dean through the house, stopping at his room first. When Dean noticed Aragon's sword hanging over Jack's wooden desk, his chest tightened a little.

"This is a place for Felix’s terrarium,” Jack waved in the direction of an empty shelf. “I hope we will transport him here soon,” he added.

Dean nodded. He had forgotten about the freaking snake. Suddenly, the prospect of sleeping at Cas's place looked more like a challenge than anything else.

Jack didn't seem to realize his internal struggle because he soon moved to the next space, explaining to Dean that Gabriel, who was apparently absent at the moment, occupied their guest bedroom.

“The bathroom is to the left, but it's boring. And this is Dad's bedroom,” Jack waved to the closed door to his right. “It's quite boring, too. And we didn't finish unpacking yet, so all the boxes are stuffed there for now,” he added, leading Dean further into the apartment.

When they entered Cas's living room, Jack walked straight to the wooden table and sat down on one of the chairs. Meanwhile, Dean's gaze swept over rows and rows of books, neatly stacked on the high bookshelves standing by the white wall, right behind the beige couch. It seemed like Cas owned a small, multilingual library.

“I'm really glad you two talked,” Jack said quietly after a beat. 

Dean looked at the boy, who observed him with a small smile. “Yeah, me too, kid,” he admitted.

“Was it scary?” Jack asked in a hushed tone.

“Yeah,” Dean chuckled, looking at his feet. “But it was totally worth it, y’know?” he added with a smirk.

The kid nodded, then spoke again after a moment. “I really like when you're around, Dean. You're cool.”

“Yeah?” Dean managed to rasp out through his dangerously tightening throat.

Jack nodded again. “And Dad is happy now,” he added. “He was in really bad shape after his birthday. I don’t want to see him like that ever again.”

Dean cleared his throat. “I hope you won’t have to, kid.”

“Just don’t argue. It’s simple,” Jack stated, shrugging.

“Well, if you put it that way,” Dean muttered, looking at his hands. “Hey, uh, how is your teacher treating you, kid?”

Jack grinned. “Good. You kinda scared her, I think.”

Dean nodded. “Yeah, she had it coming.”

Just then, Cas entered the room with a jug of water and three glasses.

“Jack, could you please take care of the napkins for me?” He asked the boy, who nodded.

“Do you need a hand?” Dean asked, observing as Cas put the water on the table while Jack skipped out of the room.

“No, everything’s almost ready. Please, make yourself at home, Dean,” Castiel responded with a soft smile, then disappeared in the doorway again. Dean followed him with his gaze, then approached the impressive collection of books, searching for anything familiar.

He spotted ‘The Odyssey’ soon after. Three Odysseys, to be exact. 

One seemed to be in Greek.

Because of course, Cas knew Greek, too.

Dean was in the middle of pondering if all of the books would actually fit in his apartment if he ever managed to convince Castiel to move back to his house, when Jack reappeared with the napkins, Cas following him with a big wok in his hands.

“Watch out, it's quite hot,” Castiel said, putting the food between the plates. “I hope you’ll like it,” he added, sitting down in front of Jack, who neatly arranged the napkins on the table.

“Well, it smells amazing and I’m starving, so we’re already halfway there,” Dean chuckled, then sat down as well.

Cas prepared a tasty Asian dish with neatly cut vegetables and rice. Apparently, there was a way to coat the tofu in flour and fry it in marinade, which resulted in a super crispy and flavorful exterior. 

Yet again, it tasted nothing like erasers.

When he more or less satisfied his hunger, Dean began to discreetly glance at Cas over the table. He soon discovered, however, that Castiel tried to do the same, so their eyes finally met. Dean let his gaze linger this time. Cas was dressed in a buttoned-up, denim shirt that made his blue eyes pop even more. His sleeves were rolled up, and the two top buttons of the shirt were loose, revealing a glimpse of his collarbone to the world. He had probably tried to do something to tame his hair, but it still remained a little bit messy. His eyes were soft, and he was smiling gently. 

“How do you like it, Dean?” he asked in his deep, velvet voice.

“It’s incredible,” Dean responded, focusing on the sharp line of Cas's jaw.

Cas chuckled, then shook his head. “Alright. Are you ready for dessert?”

“Dessert!” Jack yelled, reminding Dean he was attending a family dinner and he should behave like an adult, not a horny teenager. He cleared his throat and nodded, sending Cas a small smile. Castiel returned it, then stood up and started gathering the dirty dishes. When Dean wanted to help, Cas waved him away.

“Sit. Let me take care of that, at least today,” he said, kissing the top of Dean's head on his way out. Dean's cheeks slightly reddened. 

God, why did being in love have to be so embarrassing?

“You're cute,” Jack giggled when Cas disappeared in the doorway.

“Stop it,” Dean grumbled, his cheeks reddening even more. “What side are you on, kid?”

“But you two are already dating, there are no sides,” Jack said with a frown.

“I still need your moral support in this, bud. C'mon, be a good wingman here, and stop making fun of me,” Dean responded, smirking. Jack nodded solemnly. “Good lad. Now tell me, where did your favorite uncle go?”

“Uh… I’m not sure. When dad told him you’re coming, he said something about a gooseberry,” Jack said, then hesitated. Dean raised an eyebrow at him. The boy sighed. “I know that you two need some time for yourselves, but if I promise to behave, would you please take me with you on some of your dates? Staying here with Gabriel is a nightmare,” Jack whined, making Dean snort. “Stop laughing, you don’t have to listen to his stupid jokes,” the boy added, agitated.

“You’re right, sorry,” Dean chuckled, though he tried to contain his amusement. “Don’t worry about that. You and your dad are a package deal for me. I was actually looking forward to spending time with you too. You still need to teach me how to do this trick, where Geralt casts a spell and dodges at the same time. I can’t do it on the pad,” Dean said with a smile. “And I believe I promised you road trips to see some castles. I wanted to finally visit Sintra on Saturday with you guys.”

As Dean observed Jack’s excited expression, they suddenly heard Cas’s voice from the doorway. “I hope I won’t dig my own grave with that,” he said, carrying a plate inside with what appeared to be a homemade pie. It smelled absolutely divine. Dean’s eyes instantly widened. 

“When we met, I told you I wanted to buy you a pie, but I figured you’d like a homemade one even better," Cas said, putting the plate on the table.

Dean stared at the pastry for a beat, then turned his gaze to smiling Cas. “You want me to propose right away or what is your plan here, sunshine?”

Cas chuckled, placing a slice of the still-warm apple pie onto smaller plates. “For now, I just want you to try it and not get mad at me. One step at a time,” he said, tilting his head to the side and handing the pie to Dean. Then, he passed one plate to Jack and sat down, observing Dean’s every move.

Dean took a moment to inhale the sweet smell of cinnamon and apples, blending perfectly. The first bite would tell him everything he needed to know, he thought, sticking his fork into the pastry. It was soft and juicy, just as the ideal pie was supposed to be. With cautious anticipation, he lifted the fork to his mouth, closing his eyes.

The sweet, rich flavor instantly exploded on his taste buds, sending waves of pleasure through his senses. His mouth watered as the apples burst through the sugary sweetness. Dean couldn't suppress a delighted moan that escaped his throat.

“Oh my God,” he said, opening his eyes. “What did you add here, dude? I feel like the essence of apple pie kissed my brain,” Dean said, poking the rest of the pastry on his plate.

Castiel snorted, but Dean, too busy stuffing the dessert into his mouth, didn’t pay any attention to him.

“I’m glad you like it, then,” Cas said amused, resting his elbow on the table. “Do you want to watch a movie later?” He asked, glancing between his son and Dean.

“Oh, can we see ‘Star Trek’?" Jack asked.

Dean could only nod enthusiastically, his mouth still full of pie.

+

“Oh, so that’s a tribble,” Cas said with a serious expression, squinting at the screen of his TV.

“Dad, be quiet,” Jack chastened him from the other side of the couch. Dean chuckled, then glanced at Castiel, currently nestled under his arm. 

“Why are you narrowing your eyes?” Dean whispered into his ear.

“What?” Cas whispered back.

“You’re squinting.”

“No, I’m not.”

Dean shook his head with a smirk. “Yes, you are. And you were doing the same thing when I came to your office today.  And  you had been squinting at your book on the plane,” he said, raising his eyebrow. “Can you actually see the screen clearly?” 

Cas, who was trying hard not to squint at the moment, shot him an annoyed look. 

“Guys, shut up,” Jack growled at them.

Dean sighed, then looked back at the TV in front of them, hugging Cas closer to his side.

Perhaps Cas didn’t want to come to terms with losing his perfect sight just yet, but he’d look damn cute in a pair of glasses, Dean decided.

+

“Remember to brush your teeth!” Castiel yelled after Jack, who had disappeared in the doorway a second earlier. It was getting late, and Dean was planning to head home soon. However, Cas hadn’t yet moved from his place on the couch, or rather, he hadn’t yet lifted his head from Dean’s lap, where he had been watching the last thirty minutes of the movie. Dean hadn’t been entirely sure if he wouldn’t pass out when Cas had just casually put his head there.

Dean glanced down, finding Cas already watching him with a small smile. “Thank you for inviting me today, Cas,” he said.

“Thank you for coming,” Cas responded, his smile widening. “And for the Gollum flower.”

“Don’t mention it,” Dean said. “Well, I’m very grateful for the pie,” he added after a beat, causing Cas to chuckle.

“I’m really happy that you liked it. It could quickly go sideways with the pie,” Cas murmured with a grin.

“Don’t worry, you’re in the clear,” Dean said, running his hand over Cas’s unruly hair. They felt very soft under his touch. “Sammy invited us for dinner tomorrow.”

Cas hummed. “I know.”

“We can totally not go if you’d rather do something else,” Dean said, raising his eyebrow.

“I like your family, why wouldn’t I want to go there with you?” Cas asked.

“Alright. Perhaps we could stop by an optician on our way there?” 

Cas snorted. “You’re very persistent.”

“I don’t want you to go blind, dude.”

Castiel narrowed his eyes at him. “You’re exaggerating, it’s not that bad.”

“You do realize it can worsen if you don’t do anything about it, smartass?” Dean asked with a smirk. “'Sides, you’re gonna look hot in glasses.”

“There you go, the real reason you want me to see an optician,” Castiel chuckled.

“And it’s a perfectly good one,” Dean reasoned.

Cas sighed. “Okay, we’ll go,” he finally said, then took one of Dean’s hands and planted a kiss on the inside of his palm. Dean felt a familiar warmth pouring inside of his ribcage like sweet honey. He still couldn’t fully wrap his head around the fact that they were actually allowed to do such things now - that Cas wanted him close and Dean could just want him back, without the sky falling over their heads.

He cleared his throat. “I should probably get going,” he said after a beat.

Castiel frowned at him. “Why?”

“What do you mean ‘why’? It’s late and I don’t want to overstay my welcome.”

“You don’t want to stay?” Cas asked.

“I didn’t say that.”

“Alright. Can I convince you to stay, then?”

Dean glanced between Cas’s eyes. “I… didn’t take any spare clothes with me,” he said, realizing it wouldn’t actually hurt to have some in his trunk. “I don't even have a toothbrush,” he added.

“I can give you a toothbrush. And I'll lend you a T-shirt and underwear,” Cas responded.

“It's gonna be too big, Cas,” Dean chuckled. “And what about Jack? Isn’t he, like, afraid of sleeping alone?”

“He's been trying to sleep by himself lately. It started when we spent the night on your couch and he went to sleep upstairs without me,” Cas said, then added, “Will you stay for the night?”

Dean eyed Cas suspiciously. “Why do you insist on it so much?”

Cas bit his lip, then raised his hand and gently traced his fingertips over Dean’s right cheek. “I’m afraid you’ll get too cocky if I tell you,” he finally said with a smirk.

Dean’s eyes widened a little. “You were missing me in bed, weren’t you?” He asked with a playful grin.

“I’m not going to tell you,” Cas responded, smiling even wider. Dean’s heart did a little jump of joy at the sight. 

“Alright, I’m not staying, then,” Dean said, raising his eyebrow. 

Cas's eyes turned big and pleading. Dean was super weak. He rolled his eyes, then sighed.

“Fine, I’ll stay.”

“I knew you'd say ‘yes’,” Cas murmured, satisfied.

Fifteen minutes later, Dean got a new toothbrush, pajamas, towel, and a sweet, short kiss on the cheek before he entered the bathroom. It was getting really late, so he tried to shower and take care of other things as quickly as possible.

Once he stepped into Cas's bedroom sometime later, Dean saw that the space was indeed full of still unpacked boxes. In the corner stood a white closet from IKEA and a quite spacious, light bed was placed in the middle of the room. Cas was already lying under the covers, reading his Swedish book. When he heard Dean walking inside the room, he put it down on the bedside table.

“Alright, let's cuddle,” Dean said, lying down. Cas didn't respond but smiled and opened his arms, letting Dean position himself comfortably on his chest. Then, he hugged Dean tightly with one hand and tangled the other in Dean’s hair. Unable to control himself, Dean leaned to Cas's fingers and shivered slightly when Castiel started to lazily stroke his loose strands.

“You cut it,” Cas murmured.

Dean stayed quiet, enjoying the sensation, before he finally responded. “Yeah, in… in Lagos. I sailed there.”

Cas sighed. “I know. I checked your AIS signal almost every hour. I was worried sick,” he admitted quietly.

A surge of emotions caught Dean off guard. “I’m sorry I ran,” he said quietly. “You left me this note and I panicked.”

Cas placed a gentle kiss on Dean's forehead. “I know.”

“I was also pissed at the douchebag Benjamin,” Dean added after a beat.

“Please stop calling him that,” Castiel said, amused.

“But I hate him.” 

“I know. You tried to intimidate him with the size of your boats,” Cas said flatly.

“Well, my boats are pretty big, so…”

Cas snorted. His deep laugh resonated in his chest under Dean’s face.

“The biggest,” he murmured, moving his fingers down to Dean’s neckline. Dean trembled under the delicate touch. “He is only my friend now, Dean, I promise. I ended everything else a few months before my birthday party,” Cas added quietly.

And perhaps Dean was very stupid, perhaps he would even regret it later, but at this very moment, he couldn't help but believe everything that Cas had told him.

“Go to sleep, mon ciel étoilé,” Cas said in a hushed tone a beat later.

Dean smiled, then buried his face in Cas’s neck, feeling stupidly happy and peaceful. 

Soon after, the warmth of Cas's arms and his steady breathing lulled him to sleep.

+

Dean's alarm was truly intolerable, Castiel thought to himself as consciousness slowly returned to him. The device was very persistently ringing somewhere to their left.

Dean slowly raised his head from Cas's chest, undoubtedly to reach for the phone and stop the annoying sound. 

Castiel didn't want to wake up. He wanted to stay in bed with Dean for the whole day, cuddled under the warm blanket. Lying there, with his boyfriend sleeping in his arms, was almost the best feeling in the world. Almost, because Cas knew that there were still things awaiting them that would shake him to the very core.

And to think that a mere few days ago, Castiel had been afraid that he wouldn't have even been able to convince Dean to talk to him again. It wouldn't be very strange too, considering Cas's incredibly stupid behavior towards the man he had presented during his birthday party. Castiel had been extremely grateful for Dean’s big heart and his remarkable capacity for forgiveness, knowing all too well that he did not deserve such kindness. Dean could've easily decided he simply didn't want to have anything to do with Cas anymore, and he would've been right to do so.

Now, however, Castiel had a chance to make things right. Not that it had been any kind of hardship with Dean, who proved to be as incredible a boyfriend as he was a friend. He had said all the right things and had done absolutely everything to blow Castiel’s mind. Knowing Dean Winchester, it had been most likely completely unintentional, too - he had just followed his guts and hoped for the best. In these circumstances, the only hard time Castiel was experiencing lay solely in resisting the urge to develop even stronger feelings towards Dean in a terrifyingly short period of time - hence the idea of going slow in their relationship. Castiel should’ve known there really was no way to stop it now, but he had naively hoped he could at least slow the process down.

It, quite obviously, wasn’t working. His body had seemed to stop listening to him altogether, even going so far as to develop sleeping problems if Dean wasn’t present by Castiel’s side.

Finally, the ringing ended, and Dean's head returned to its place on Cas's torso. 

“Good morning,” Cas murmured, putting his hand on Dean's hair. When he started stroking it absentmindedly, Dean leaned to the touch. 

“Good morning, sunshine,” Dean responded. He sounded relaxed. When he looked up, Castiel was pierced through the heart with his green gaze and playful grin.

He couldn’t remember the last time he was this thrilled to be close to anyone. Then again, his closeness with Dean was very different from being intimate with any other person before, Cas thought, tracing the line of freckles on the bridge of Dean's nose with his thumb. Castiel had always liked the feeling of warm fingers on his skin or engaging in a passionate kiss, but it had never been exactly essential to his existence. With Dean, however, it started to feel more like a basic, raw need. That in mind, Cas knew it was only a matter of time before his resolve to take slow steps forward in their relationship would shatter completely, and his desires would swallow him up. It actually took a lot of restraint not to get lost in this feeling already, and simply press their bodies together, allowing his erection to push against Dean's thigh and kiss the man into oblivion.

And boy, did Dean know how to kiss back! He had been gentle, but definitely not shy or spooked, like Castiel had thought he could get. He had also quickly taken the initiative, letting his hands and tongue explore to his liking. Cas had loved absolutely every second of it. He had also started to realize that Dean's cheeky and impish nature, along with his slightly bratty attitude, made him probably the best partner Cas could ever dream of.

Since it was evident that they were not going to last long like this, Castiel's only plan for now was to postpone the inevitable, at least. They still had to actually talk about risks and expectations before they would engage themselves in any sexual activities. Castiel wasn't born yesterday, so he was far from naive - they both had to stay safe and conscious of everything that would be going on between them.

He sighed, observing Dean’s handsome features. “Your freckles are like tiny constellations,” he murmured.

Dean’s cheeks immediately reddened. “Shut up,” he grumbled.

Cas tilted his head. “Why?” he asked, then added quietly, “You are stunning, Dean.”

“You can't just say stuff like that,” Dean muttered weakly.

Castiel hummed. “I actually can,” he said with a smirk.

Dean grumbled something unintelligible, then shyly looked away. Castiel's heart sank a little. Compliments were one of the things that Dean did not react well to, and Castiel knew that during his birthday party, he had only reinforced Dean's sense of inadequacy. He was determined to correct his mistake, and therefore decided to continuously expose Dean to various forms of praise, reminding him how perfect he was exactly.

“What are you going to work on today?” Castiel asked after a beat, moving his hand to Dean's nape. He was very sensitive to his neck, so the moment Castiel's fingers touched his skin there, Dean shivered.

“I need to supervise releasing three sold units to the buyers.”

Cas hummed, observing the warmth in Dean's green eyes. “Which ones?” 

“Two 46 and one 42-foot,” Dean responded, covering a yawn with the back of his hand. “What about your day, Cas?”

“We are trying to establish a smart way to promote your…” he Castiel stopped, then huffed before continuing. “…our company in the Asian market,” he corrected himself. Dean smiled sweetly. “That’s why I consulted the lawyer yesterday,” Cas added, observing a pout forming on Dean’s face. “What?” He asked, raising his eyebrow.

“S’nothing,” Dean grumbled.

“Your ‘nothing’ seems to be full of something.”

Dean sighed, glancing back at Cas’s face. Castiel couldn’t help but notice that Dean started to suddenly look like a very unhappy Labrador. “He took you to lunch,” Dean finally mumbled.

Castiel wanted to snort, but managed to refrain from it, recognizing that for his boyfriend, it seemed to be a serious matter. It was truly baffling that such a man as Dean Winchester - with his striking eyes and perfect lips - decided to be jealous of anybody. Then again, he was extremely insecure and seemed oblivious to his own value, so this shouldn’t surprise Castiel as much as it did. Dean probably wouldn’t believe him, but if there were ever a contest to capture Cas's attention, Dean would effortlessly claim the title of champion, hands down.

Castiel smiled, finally deciding to divert Dean's attention. “And you made me a vegan tortilla. It was delicious,” he said, cupping Dean’s cheek.

Dean instantly perked up. “Yeah? I used this vegan mayo I had found earlier, I think it did the trick.”

“It really did,” Cas admitted, stroking the soft skin of Dean’s face. Dean smiled and closed his eyes, enjoying the touch.

“Alright,” Dean sighed after a moment. “I’m gonna get us some coffee. Stay here,” he mumbled, slowly getting himself up from the bed. Cas followed him with his sight, observing as his gray sweatpants barely hung on Dean’s hips while he padded bare feet through the bedroom.

When Dean closed the door behind him, Castiel let his eyes rest again. Dean hadn't been exactly wrong that Cas had had problems with his eyesight lately, hence visiting an optician would probably be a good move. Castiel had needed a proper nudge in the right direction, even if it was still hard to admit that he required any aid to simply see clearly.

Sometime later, the door opened again. Castiel decided to keep his eyes closed a moment longer, at least until Dean would join him back in bed. When the mattress dipped beside him, Castiel wanted to scoot closer, but the familiar voice stopped his movements.

“I hope you’re not naked under the covers, little bro, that would be gross.”

Castiel’s eyes snapped open, revealing Gabriel, still in his pink pajamas, sitting on the top of the bed’s comforter. “So, the loverboy stayed for the night?” He asked, wiggling his eyebrows.

“Gabriel,” Cas growled. “First of all, I told you to knock every time you want to enter my bedroom. Second of all, it’s not your damn business if Dean is here or not,” he said, then tilted his head. “I thought you went out for the night.”

“Bro, chill out,” Gabriel frowned, moving away from Cas. “I came back at 3 AM. And I’m actually happy for you two.” Castiel eyed him suspiciously. “I am. Stop looking at me like that,” Gabriel grumbled. “I was wrong about him, I admit.”

Castiel squinted at his brother. “Are you feeling alright, Gabriel? Perhaps it’s a stroke…” he muttered. “Do you feel any numbness on your face?”

Gabriel rolled his eyes. “I’m not having a stroke.”

“It doesn't seem like you are slurring…” Castiel said, tilting his head. “Can you raise your hands for me?”

“You are hilarious,” Gabriel said flatly. “Listen, I can stay with Jackie from time to time so you wouldn’t have to sneak off for a sexy time with Dean-o,” he added. He looked sincere, to Cas’s complete confusion.

“I… thank you?” Castiel finally said. Perhaps he didn’t properly check the symptoms of a stroke, after all?

“Yeah, I’m actually this awesome,” Gabriel added, crossing his arms on his chest.

The door to the bedroom opened again, and this time, it was Dean who entered the space, holding two mugs of coffee. He smiled at Castiel, then spotted Gabriel and raised his eyebrows. 

“Dude, I have only two coffees and I’m not giving you mine,” he stated, circling the bed and stopping beside Cas. “There you go, sweetheart,” he said with a small smile, handing one mug to Castiel.

“Thank you, Dean,” Cas responded, reaching out for his coffee. Dean grinned wider, then sat on the verge of the bed and supported himself on his free hand, sipping his beverage.

“Damn, you two are adorable,” Gabriel muttered under his breath, shaking his head. 

“Dean, do you think Gabriel is slurring?” Castiel asked, tilting his head.

“I’m not having a stroke, Cassie.”

“I don’t know, he talks like this all the time, I guess,” Dean said with a frown, observing Cas's brother closely.

The door to the bedroom opened once more, revealing Jack, dressed and ready for the day.

“What are you all doing here?” The boy asked, glancing between the three men occupying Cas's bed.

“We're discussing important, adult stuff,” Gabriel supplied.

Jack looked very unimpressed. “Uh-huh. We’re going to be late, guys,” he said, raising his eyebrow.

“Oh, shit, you’re right,” Dean muttered, glancing at his watch. “Alright, I’m gonna make you a sandwich, kid. C’mon,” he said, standing up.

“Marry him, or I will,” Gabriel said, patting Cas’s knee once the door shut behind them. Castiel rolled his eyes at his brother, trying to hide a shy smile behind the rim of his mug.

+

“How about those?” Dean asked, raising a pair of glasses to Cas’s face. He tried a few square ones, but in Dean’s opinion, he looked way cuter in the ones with rounded edges. 

Castiel put the glasses on and looked at himself in the little mirror by the stand, tilting his head. “I look old,” he finally muttered with a frown.

“No, you don’t. You look hot,” Dean stated, standing behind Cas so he could see the reflection as well. Castiel glanced at Dean in the mirror, then moved his head, observing himself from different angles.

“Do you really think so?” He asked, unsure.

Dean grinned. “Why would I lie to you, Cas?” He asked, hugging Castiel from behind and hooking his chin over Cas’s shoulder.

“Alright,” Castiel said softly after a moment, then turned his head in the direction of his son. The boy was looking through the sunglasses on the stand nearby. “Jack, how do I look? Be honest.” 

Jack squinted at his dad, then gave a thumbs up and focused on the sunglasses again. Cas sighed, then took the glasses off his face.

“I'll trust your judgment then,” he said with a small smile, then took Dean’s hand into his and marched up to the counter, pulling Dean with him.

“Good choice, Mr. Novak,” the lady said, smiling at them. “Your boyfriend sure has a taste!”

Dean felt his cheeks reddening. He shot Cas a frightened look, but Castiel remained oblivious, smiling softly at the shop assistant. Dean looked at the lady again. He could just let the comment slide and forget about the whole deal, but he felt like an imposter and it didn't sit right with him.

“We’re not in a relationship,” he finally said quietly.

The girl's eyes widened, but before she could say anything, Castiel turned his frowning face at him. “What are you talking about? Of course we are,” he said firmly, narrowing his eyes at Dean.

Dean could only frown back at him.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t want to assume anything,” the girl muttered, but Castiel didn’t pay her any attention, his intense gaze transfixed at Dean’s eyes. Dean gulped, then sent the lady an apologetic smile and pulled Castiel away from the counter by his sleeve. When they were standing in a safe distance, Dean glanced at Cas’s face again. He looked seriously confused now.

“You said you wanted to try dating me. Did something change?” Cas asked, frustrated.

Dean shook his head “Nothing has changed,” he said, grasping Cas’s hand in his and intervening their fingers. “You just said you wanna date me. I thought you need some time to decide if you actually want to, y’know, be in a relationship with me,” Dean responded weakly, glancing between Cas’s ocean eyes. 

“Well, I don’t need time,” Cas stated. “This is absurd,” he muttered, then called Jack from the other end of the shop. When the boy approached them, Castiel asked him something in the language that Dean suspected could only be Swedish. The kid tilted his head and opened his mouth, glancing briefly at Dean, then back at his dad. He rolled his eyes, then nodded and responded something, waving his hands in the air. Castiel tilted his head as well. Dean just stood there, waiting for the verdict.

Finally, Castiel looked back at him. “You want to tell me there is an actual difference between dating and being together?” He asked, raising his eyebrow at Dean.

“I mean, there can be,” Dean muttered, glancing at Jack. The boy was observing their conversation with a deep frown and his arms crossed on his chest.

Cas narrowed his eyes at Dean again. “I thought I was quite straightforward before, but it's obviously not the case here. I want to be in a relationship with you,” he said evenly in his very deep voice, leaning closer to Dean. “Do you want to be in one with me?”

Dean almost snorted, but managed to keep a straight face. “Yep,” he finally said, accenting the ‘p’ at the end. His heart was doing happy somersaults in his chest.

“Good,” Castiel said, raising his eyebrow. “Now, if that’s crystal clear in every language, can you please stop telling people that we’re not together?”

“Absolutely,” Dean said with a nod, biting his lips. He was slowly losing the fight with his face.

“Great. Let’s finally buy the stupid glasses, then,” Castiel said, pulling Dean back to the counter, Jack marching behind them. When they approached the girl again, Dean saw she was white as a sheet. 

“The prescribed lenses will be inserted into the chosen frames. It takes about two weeks. We will inform you via text that you can pick up your glasses,” she quickly said, looking anywhere but at Cas. “I’m very sorry for interfering,” she started after a beat, but Castiel stopped her before she could say anything else.

“Don’t worry about it. You unintentionally resolved a problem that I wasn’t even aware of,” he said, raising his eyebrows at Dean.

“Y-yes. Turns out we’re together, after all,” Dean said, almost choking on his own tongue.

He heard Jack snorting behind him.

+

“This is so romantic,” Eileen said with a dreamy look on her face. “I wish we could start our relationship like that,” she added, frowning at Sam.

“What do you mean?” Sammy asked, visibly nervous. “I- I gave you flowers and uh… I took you on a date,” he added unsure. Dean covered a laugh with a cough. Sam shot him an irritated glance, before looking back at his wife with his puppy eyes.

“Don’t sweat it, I know you love me,” Eileen said, patting Sam on the knee. “I wouldn’t give birth to your three children if I wasn’t sure about your feelings towards me,” she assured him with a small smile. Sam chuckled, relaxing on his chair. “But still, fighting during a fortieth birthday party and making up in France, under a starry sky sounds epic,” she added, looking back at Castiel.

“I’d say it was more traumatic than anything else, but what do I know,” Dean muttered, making Castiel narrow his eyes at him. “What? The talk was scary, dude,” Dean added, raising his eyebrow.

Before Can could answer, Sam got their attention by clearing his throat. “We’re happy for you, guys. It's great that Dean managed to finally find someone who will attend family dinners with him. I was getting worried it would never happen.”

Dean furrowed his brow. “Hey!”

“What, Dean? You haven't brought a single person over since Cassie.”

“Cassie?” Cas asked, amused.

Dean narrowed his eyes at Sam, then glanced at Cas, sitting beside him on the couch. “Yeah, my first serious girlfriend, back in the States.”

“I see,” Castiel said with a small smile.

“I remember that Bobby was thrilled when she finally came to visit us,” Sam chuckled. 

“I hope he will like me, too,” Cas admitted after a beat.

Sam huffed. “Why wouldn't he, Cas? The only person he was not so sure about was this blond girl who wanted to have Dean's babies right away,” he added with a grin. “I can’t even remember her name.”

“Is there a chance you won't blab about my exes right now, Sammy, or do I have to mention Ruby for you to actually shut your mouth?” Dean growled at his brother.

Sam sent him a bitch face. “Really, Dean?” he said, but finally shut up, shaking his head in disbelief.

“You two are hopeless," Eileen declared, casting a sympathetic glance at Castiel. "Ignore them. I'm more interested in you telling us if Dean is a decent boyfriend.”

“Oh my God,” Dean muttered, running a hand across his face.

Castiel chuckled, then grasped Dean's hand into his and kissed his knuckles, before responding to Eileen. “He’s one of a kind,” he finally said, making Dean blush.

“Aww… this is cute,” Eileen said, putting a hand over her heart. “You are probably my favorite couple right now,” she admitted. “You know Cas, you and Jack are welcome to stop by regardless of family dinners. Jack is such a nice boy, and he seems to get along with our kids. They like to spend time together,” she added after a beat.

“Yes, well, it doesn't surprise me. Jack always wanted to have some siblings. He loves to spend time with Claire as well,” Castiel said, then added, “Jimmy's daughter,” when he saw Eileen's and Sam's curious glances.

“How old is she, anyway?” Dean asked. 

“Sixteen. She’s a little rebellious,” Cas responded with a small smirk. “I actually promised to visit them in a week or two. I think I'll take Jack with me, we could see his grandparents as well. I think he misses them a bit.”

“It’s really not that strange, he used to spend a lot of time with them,” Eileen said, then looked around with a frown. “Hey, isn’t it a bit too peaceful?” she asked, glancing at Sam.

“Yeah, you're right,” Sam said. “I’d better check on the kids,” he added, standing up. 

“Alright. I'll get us something to drink, then.” Eileen said, then looked at Castiel and Dean. “You want some tea, boys?”

When both of them nodded, she left the room, following her husband.

“Hey, how is Jimmy, by the way? I didn't get a chance to speak to him after our meeting at the office,” Dean asked, taking Cas’s hand into his again. Castiel was wearing a black, casual shirt today that nicely highlighted the definition in his forearms.

“I think he might've actually stopped being so annoying,” Cas responded with a smirk. “I must say I envy you a little, Dean. Your family is extremely supportive of your… choices. It's a true gift,” he added after a beat, glancing at their joined hands.

“Yeah,” Dean muttered, stroking Cas’s hand softly. “I was afraid to come out to them, but they were all okay with everything.”

Cas nodded, his smile turning sad. “When I came out as gay to my family, it wasn’t pleasant. Jimmy is very religious, and so is my other brother, Michael. And my father, of course. They were far from accepting. We have not been on great terms since then.” 

Dean frowned. “Wait, you’re gay? What about Meg?”

Cas sighed. “I wasn’t always so sure about my preferences. I knew I wasn’t straight, but before I figured it out, I experimented a little. I guess she still had hope that I’d change my mind,” he muttered.

“Huh,” Dean mumbled, thinking about his own struggles with sexuality. Maybe it wasn’t as simple as he thought it was, after all? “Well, I’m happy you’re into me, that’s for sure,” he finally said, smiling at Cas. 

“That’s one way to put it,” Cas said quietly. He looked amused. “Believe me, Dean, even if I didn’t know I was into men before, I’d figure it out the moment I met you,” he added, raising one of his eyebrows.

“Hey, that’s exactly what happened to me when I saw you,” Dean countered.

Castiel paused, a flicker of surprise crossing his features. “What do you mean?”

“Well,” Dean started, “I didn’t know I was bi before I met you. It all clicked into place in Christiansø.”

Cas searched Dean’s face for a long moment before he spoke again. “Do you want to tell me you’ve felt attraction towards me since then?”

Dean took a deep breath, then shook his head and looked at Sammy’s colorful carpet. “Nah. It actually happened at the quay in Visby,” he admitted quietly. “You wore this yellow sweater of yours and had a little beard. But when I saw your blue eyes, it was pretty much game over for me.”

The silence between them thickened. Dean kept tracing the patterns on the carpet with his gaze, too scared to look back at Castiel.

“Dean…” Cas finally murmured beside him.

“Yeah, I’m a sap, I know,” Dean muttered, feeling his cheeks getting hot. He wanted to look away to hide his emotions a little better, but Cas’s hand on his chin stopped him. He lifted Dean’s face and gently turned it towards himself. He tenderly caressed Dean’s cheek, then ran his thumb over Dean's lower lip. When he pulled Dean closer, grasping his neck with his other hand, Dean obediently leaned forward, holding his breath. His heart felt like it was about to burst from his chest.

“What happened to taking things slow?” He whispered right before Cas’s nose touched his. 

Cas grinned, briefly glancing at his eyes. “Shut up, Dean,” he said, then closed the remaining distance, melding their lips together.

Dean found very little time to dwell on their current circumstances, especially on the fact that they were making out on his brother's couch. To be honest, there wasn't much thinking going on in Dean’s head at the moment - he was too absorbed in the electrifying sensation spreading through him like lightning when Cas’s tongue slipped between his lips. Dean’s fingers instinctively tangled in Cas's hair, drawing him closer. He greedily dove between the parted mouth before him, entwining his tongue with Cas's. It felt heavenly, as if he had submerged into a deep ocean, immersed in the smell and taste of the storm. 

Breathing is overrated, Dean thought, when Castiel pressed against his chest a moment later, making Dean lean back on the backrest cushion. He pulled Castiel along, sucking on his lower lip and getting a muffled groan in return. In his pursuit to extract more of those lovely sounds, Dean slowly swirled his tongue around Cas’s, before pulling it back and making Castiel chase him a bit. When he repeated the process, Cas moaned frustratingly, and broke the kiss, grasping Dean’s jaw in his hand. He grinned at Dean, tilting his head to his liking, before diving back into his parted lips and trapping Dean between the cushions. 

Restricted from making any maneuvers, Dean was now at the complete mercy of Cas, who licked and sucked at Dean’s mouth to his liking, until he finally slid his whole tongue deep into Dean’s throat. Dean rolled his eyes backward as he moaned obscenely, utterly lost in the sensation. He was about ready to remove the layers of clothes that separated them, but before he had a chance, he heard Sam’s angry voice coming from the doorway.

“Guys, come on!” his brother whined.

Right. They were making out on Sam’s couch.

Reluctantly, Cas pulled away and Dean opened his eyes, following the source of the noise with a frown. Sammy, possibly quite horrified, stood by the entrance to his living room with a pot of tea in his hands. Behind him, with an incredibly wide grin on her face, stood Eileen, carrying mugs.

Dean glanced back at Cas, who was panting heavily. His hair was even messier than before, his cheeks reddened and lips slightly swollen. Dean couldn’t help but feel a little proud of himself.

“Dean, there are kids in this house,” Sammy hissed, getting Dean’s attention.

"Hey, why am I the one getting scolded? He kissed me!" Dean whined.

“I didn’t hear you complaining a moment ago, Dean,” Castiel murmured.

Dean glanced back at his boyfriend. “Yeah, 'cause it was awesome,” he said with a grin.

“Oh my God,” Sam muttered, looking at the ceiling. Meanwhile, Eileen gave them a thumbs up and an appreciative nod. Dean snorted, letting his head fall back on the cushion behind him. Cas, still half-lying on top of him, joined Dean soon after, his deep voice echoing in Dean’s ribcage. It was a silly and uncontrollable kind of laughter, so a beat later even his brother started to giggle. Dean couldn’t stop until tears formed in the corners of his eyes, and his sides started to ache.

+

“You need to crush it to get the best taste before you cut it. Here, let me show you,” Dean said to Jack, who was battling the garlic in his kitchen. “Use the side of the knife and lean on it, y’know?”

They were cooking eggplant again. During his relationship with Castiel, Dean would become a freaking expert on this vegetable in no time, he thought, while the smell of garlic filled the air.

“Alright. Now, chop it for me, bud,” Dean said, moving to the other side of the space to take care of the onions. 

When his gramophone played the first notes of Zepp’s ‘Ramble On’ in the background, Dean started moving to the beat. Halfway through the onion, he was humming the song under his breath. When the chorus came in, he was already singing at the top of his voice. 

The sound drew Castiel to the kitchen. He approached the countertop glancing at Jack, then turned his attention to Dean with his sweet, private smile. He moved to Dean's back and hugged him from behind, looking over his shoulder. 

Dean’s heart skipped a few beats. Some dreams really could come true. 

“Why are you making eggplant again?” Castiel whispered directly into Dean’s ear. Dean slightly shivered, then glanced at Jack. Luckily, the boy was completely immersed in cutting the pepper.

Dean cleared his throat, then turned his head in the direction of Cas’s face. “'Cause it’s your favorite vegetable?” He replied quietly, raising his eyebrow. 

Cas chuckled, resting his forehead on Dean’s shoulder. “I think we need to talk,” he said after a beat, clearly amused. 

Dean stopped cutting and frowned, putting the knife down. “About what?”

Castiel raised his head, then turned Dean around and stepped between his legs, pressing their hips together. “About vegetables,” he said, before planting a sweet, short kiss on Dean’s mouth. It ended before Dean could fully comprehend that it had started, but a kiss was a kiss, nevertheless. It was still a pretty new development in their relationship, so Dean was quite surprised every time it happened. Not that it had happened many times since dinner at Sam’s and Eileen’s two days prior, but Castiel had definitely moved from Dean’s cheek to his lips with his little, sweet smooches.

“Finished,” Jack announced, glancing at Dean. “I need to use the bathroom. I’ll be right back,” he added, then put the knife down and ran upstairs. Dean followed the boy with his gaze, then looked at Castiel in his arms. 

“What’s with the vegetable talk?”

Castiel’s grin widened. “Eggplant is a dick, Dean.”

Dean frowned. “What are you talking about?”

Cas sighed, observing Dean’s face. “Emoji of an eggplant represents a penis. I honestly thought you were joking with the whole obliviousness, but it seems you really didn’t know, and this has gone too far. Someone had to tell you the truth before you started to cook the damn thing on our every anniversary.”

Dean’s frown deepened. A few text messages he had received in the last couple of years suddenly made a whole lotta sense. 

The information also meant that Castiel might've actually flirted with him earlier than Dean had initially thought. 

“Huh…” he finally said, nodding his head. “So, you don’t really like eggplants?”

Cas’s eyes gleamed mischievously. “I do,” he said, biting his lower lip. 

Dean’s gaze followed the movement. How was it even possible that Cas, who was built like a brick wall, managed to look sweet and coy, curled in Dean's embrace?

“Don’t make such a face at me, sweetheart,” Dean murmured, leaning forward with a playful grin. He felt a thrill running down his spine as the gap closed and their lips met. He shut his eyes, pulling Castiel closer by his belt loops and enjoying the softness of his mouth.

Cas pulled away a beat later with a sigh, leaning his forehead on Dean’s. “Can I help you with dinner, so we could speed the process of cooking a little? I’m hungry,” he said with a small smile.

Dean chuckled, then turned his head to the counter, looking for another knife.

+

The morning light was leaking into the room through Dean’s blinds, softly illuminating the gray sheets of the bed. Dean slowly blinked, realizing the heaviness he felt on his chest was actually, partly lying on top of him, Cas. He was still asleep, his face soft and relaxed. His right hand was loosely lying on Dean’s abdomen and their legs were entangled. 

Dean smiled then brushed a strand of hair away from Cas's face with his free hand. How he'd scored such a beautiful creature remained a mystery to him.

Careful not to disturb his boyfriend, Dean glanced at his watch, then closed his eyes again and pulled Cas closer. They still had some time left, there was no need to wake up just yet.

Suddenly, his phone started to ring. It wasn’t an alarm, but an actual human being who'd decided that calling Dean before 8 in the fucking morning was a good idea. Dean pulled himself up and reached for the phone before it could wake Cas up, glancing at the screen.

“Are you nuts, Crowley?” Dean growled once he picked up. Castiel stirred under the covers beside him.

“Hello to you too, Squirrel. I just want to personally inform you that you’re needed at the company quay tomorrow at 9 AM, dressed in your best suit. We need to finally photograph your pretty face.”

“And why are you calling me at this hour, exactly?” Dean asked quietly, trying to contain his anger.

“You are quite hard to catch lately. I thought the best bet would be to call you before you wake up,” Crowley said smugly. He had called Dean once during the last few days, but Dean had ignored him, figuring that Sam would update him if it was really that important.

After a beat, Crowley spoke again, “You don't happen to know where our Angel is? I can’t seem to get a hold of Feathers. We need him, too.”

Dean glanced at the other side of the bed, where Cas’s phone was very clearly not plugged in. The battery had probably died during the night.

“Yeah, I’ll let him know that you called,” Dean said.

“So, you do know where he is?” Crowley asked, his voice suspicious. 

Dean was about to tell Crowley a few things about minding his own business, but suddenly, his phone was taken from his hand.

“Fuck off, Crowley,” Cas rumbled into the speaker, then disconnected the call and tossed the phone onto the bed before pulling Dean back under the covers. He executed each action with swift movements, leaving Dean very little time to react. 

Learning from past experience, Dean decided to simply let Cas do as he pleased. He didn't want to be growled at again, after all.

They had spent the previous night apart, resulting in Cas’s extraordinary grumpiness - it apparently had been so bad that Gabe had begged Dean to do something with his brother before he lost his mind. Dean had happily suggested dinner and a sleepover at his place. It hadn’t been the perfect, romantic date that Dean had been planning for them, but the eggplant had turned out quite tasty (also, Castiel had looked at his ocean table in a very suggestive way, making Dean blush fiercely) and they had watched the next ‘Star Trek’ movie. The whole evening left Dean with this happy, jumpy feeling in his ribcage again, urging him to keep Castiel and Jack close as much as possible. It sounded a little pathetic and needy, especially since it had never happened to Dean in any of his previous relationships - but again, he had never been in love before, so he couldn’t really say if whatever he felt was good or bad.

“I can feel you’re thinking, Dean,” Castiel muttered tiredly beside him.

Dean hummed, lost in thoughts. “I want to take you guys to Sintra on Saturday,” he said quietly after a beat.

Cas purred beside him but didn’t open his eyes. “Sounds great,” he finally rumbled. His voice was very deep in the mornings, Dean noticed. “It seems you’re still troubled,” Cas added, opening one, blue eye. “You're tense.”

Dean sighed. “I’m a little worried that we don’t exactly do our dates properly,” he said, glancing at Cas.

“What do you mean?” Castiel asked with a frown.

“Well, we do pretty normal stuff instead of those big, romantic dinners with candles and uh… violin?” Dean ended, unsure. “I mean, I love spending time with you, don’t get me wrong, it’s just that I should sweep you off your feet, y’know? And all you’ve got until now were family dinners and sleepovers.”

Cas chuckled softly, then propped his head on his elbow. “Dean, you told me we could make our own dating rules. I enjoy every second I spend together with you. Why should we change anything if we’re both comfortable with the things we do?” He asked, tracing his fingers along the curve of Dean's cheek. Dean closed his eyes, then put his hand on Cas’s. He felt pure joy bubbling up inside of his chest, threatening to spill over. He smiled, then moved Cas’s palm to his lips and kissed it, before finally letting go.

“Alright. Let’s make our own rules, then,” he said, opening his eyes again. “But I will take you on a real date, eventually. And it will blow your mind.”

Castiel smiled sweetly. “Can’t wait.”

Chapter Text

When Dean arrived at the company’s quay the next morning, he saw Crowley stepping out of his slick, black car. Cas’s Lincoln and Sam’s truck were already parked a few spots away.

“Good morning,” Crowley greeted him.

“Crowley,” Dean acknowledged with a nod. “Why am I here, again?”

“I believe my assistant sent you an email informing you about our idea for an advertising campaign for Singer & Winchesters. This is one of the steps to push it forward,” he said, eyeing Dean suspiciously. “Tell me, why Feathers was in bed with you the other day? The last time I checked, you were a ladies' man.”

Dean sent him a nasty grin. “Aren't you a curious cat?”

Crowley narrowed his eyes at him. “I told you, I'm a businessman. I simply care about my assets,” he said, leaning a little closer to Dean's face. “I must say, it's quite an interesting development. However, I'd like you to remember that your company needs him. I need him, and I need him exactly where he is right now. I don't want you to screw this up, Squirrel.”

“Are you done?” Dean asked, then moved to the direction of their boats without waiting for an answer.

Cas, with his hair ruffled and his blue suit on, was talking with Sam, standing beside him, hands in his pockets. His brother noticed Dean first, waving in his direction. Castiel turned to Dean soon after and a sweet smile bloomed on his face.

“Hiya, Sammy,” Dean greeted his brother, then sent Cas a wink.

“Hello, Dean,” Castiel rumbled.

“Hey, sunshine,” Dean said with a grin, and when he noticed that Castiel’s tie seemed to be crooked, he started straightening it.

“Fascinating,” Crowley muttered behind him, then cleared his throat. “Gentlemen,” he said louder, grabbing their attention. “The photographers will be here in a moment, so let’s establish some ground rules. First of all, you will do everything they want you to do. Especially the two of you,” he said, pointing at both Castiel and Dean.

Cas slowly stepped away from Dean, glancing at Crowley. “As long as it’s appropriate.”

Dean nodded. “Yeah, we ain’t gonna strip.”

Crowley gave him a quick once-over. “Shame,” he said with a sly smile. Dean made a face at him, while Cas’s eyes turned dangerously cold. Crowley raised his eyebrow at them. “Stand down, boys. I am simply trying to help your business grow,” he said smugly. “We’re doing the photoshoot on the boat since that’s what we’re trying to sell,” he added after a moment, waving in the direction of the vessel berthed nearby. “Second of all, don’t complain,” he continued, glancing at Dean.

“Why are you looking at me, dude?”

“You know damn well why, Squirrel.”

“Stop calling me that.”

“And third,” Crowley said, ignoring Dean. “The sooner you finish, the sooner you will be able to return to your normal workday.” He glanced at the parking lot, where five people were unpacking things from a white van. “I believe that’s our crew. I’ll be right back. Don’t wander off,” he said, leaving the three of them alone at the quay. Dean observed him for a moment, then turned to Cas with a grin.

“How was the gym yesterday?” He asked, playing with Cas’s tie.

“I took too long of a break since my last workout, and now my muscles are sore,” Cas winced. “It’s a shame you didn’t come with me, Dean,” he added, tilting his head. 

“I know, but we actually managed to reinstall the furling drum. I hope it’s gonna work, this time,” Dean responded. He had spent the entire evening with Benny on Baby, taking the opportunity to catch up with his friend. Fortunately, Benny seemed to be doing better lately. “You got a gym membership already?” Sam asked Castiel with a frown.

“Yes, I decided to join the same as Dean,” Castiel responded.

Sam suddenly looked bummed. “Man, I thought you would choose mine.”

“And why would he do that, exactly, Samantha?” Dean asked, raising his eyebrow at his brother.

Sam frowned at him. “He's my friend, Dean, and you have monopolized all of his time lately.”

“That's 'cause we’re dating, Sammy. You’re, like, absurd,” Dean grumbled, then glanced at his boyfriend. 

Castiel watched the exchange between the brothers with a fond smile, his eyes sparkling with affection. “I’m very happy that you consider me your friend, Sam,” he finally said. 

Sammy huffed. “Of course I do, Cas.” 

“Alright, enough of that,” Dean muttered, scanning the area for any sign of Crowley's return. Indeed, the Brit was approaching them again with other people following behind him. They were carrying cameras and funny-looking equipment. 

“Boys, I want you to meet Fabio,” he said, while the closest guy to Crowley greeted them with a smile. “He’s a professional, I assure you. I actually need to get back to the office now, so remember to behave,” Crowley added, stopping his gaze at Dean for a beat longer. Then, he turned around and walked to his car.

Shortly after, Fabio and his crew got to work. Cas, Dean, and Sam were instructed to stand or sit in different places on the boat, sometimes alone and sometimes as a whole group. The general idea seemed to be capturing the Winchester brothers together, as the owners of the business, and then doing some more Cas solo photos. Dean soon found out that even if he truly hated to pose, observing as Cas was doing it was actually pretty hot. Fabio managed to somehow persuade Castiel to strip from his jacket and roll up his sleeves, showing his juicy forearms, so Dean had to battle with himself to keep from ogling the guy. When Cas smirked at him at one point, Dean’s knees went weak.

“Oh, this is good,” Fabio mumbled, looking at the screen. “Dean, can I ask you to join Castiel on the deck, please?” He asked after he whispered something to the girl with another camera. Dean nodded, then stepped into the cockpit, waiting for further instructions. Fabio told him to take off his jacket and put it over his shoulder, so Dean did what he was asked and finally looked at Castiel, who was already observing him. Dean felt instantly hot around his collar.

To others, Cas's gaze might have seemed no different from his usual composed demeanor. But to Dean, the slight shifts in his features and the intensity of his blue eyes suggested that Castiel would rather take him to a much more secluded place, possibly far from prying eyes and photographers.

And Dean yearned to reach out to him, to curl his fingers around the seam of Cas’s pants and draw him closer. Strangely enough, the urge to touch, if only for a moment, surged within him despite the presence of all the people and cameras observing them from every side. It was quite baffling, since Dean’s brain still wasn’t exactly comfortable with the idea of showing signs of affection to another man in public. He hadn’t had many opportunities to try it out, either - a kiss on the plane didn’t really count, since Dean hadn’t been exactly aware of the people around them, and all the other places they’d had a chance to show affection had been quite secluded - and even then, Dean would lie if he said he had felt completely confident when they had been holding hands or hugging each other.

And yet, Dean’s body seemed to forget about all of the uneasiness and fears now, washing him with warmth and longing that was incredibly difficult to ignore.

“Yes! Perfect! Keep it up!” Fabio exclaimed excitedly somewhere from the deck, but Dean didn't register anything he said, too busy trying to not pop a boner in front of his brother and at least three cameras. He shifted nervously from one leg to the other.

“You look tense,” Cas murmured with a small smile.

Dean took a deep breath in an attempt to regain his composure. “Please don’t try to help me relax right now,” he replied quietly, so only Cas would hear him. 

Castiel looked down with a nod and an amused hum. When he glanced back up, his smile seemed to deepen and his eyes began to gleam mischievously. They were so fucking blue. Dean gulped. 

“Terrific. Now, please lean on both sides of the mast for me, guys,” Fabio said after a moment, moving to the bow. 

Once they both positioned themselves as the photographer ordered, Dean looked at the camera, but quickly found himself unable to focus on the photoshoot anymore. He was very aware of Castiel's proximity, the pull between them almost palpable by now. It was intense and very hard to resist, just like the kiss they had shared on his brother’s couch. Dean wasn’t sure if he would've mustered the strength to stop if Sam hadn’t entered the room that day. Well, at least until Cas would tell him to stop, that is.

But Castiel hadn't seemed interested in stopping, either.

Dean glanced at Cas again, drawing his ocean eyes to him.

It didn’t seem they were going slow anymore, he thought. It actually seemed they were both struggling to keep their hands to themselves.

“Okay, I think we've got everything we need,” Fabio suddenly stated. “You've been wonderful, thank you,” he added, then started talking with his crew again. 

Dean sighed, pulled out of his thoughts, then sent Cas a small smile. He turned away from him, ready to get off the boat, but Cas's hand on his shoulder stopped him in his tracks. He felt a pleasant shiver running down his spine. 

“Will you eat lunch with me before we get back to the office?” Cas asked quietly. Dean nodded in response. Cas hummed, then reached for Dean's hand.

And even though Dean’s brain seemed to slightly panic, he didn’t pull away. He didn’t think he could, not when the warmth of Cas's touch was so comforting, so desperately needed in that moment.

“My, my,” said Crowley when they approached him and Sam on the quay. “I might've slightly misjudged the situation,” he added, glancing between Castiel and Dean with a sly smile.

Dean rolled his eyes at him. “Whatever, Crowley,” he grumbled. “Now if that’s all you need from us, we’re gonna roll. We’re both hungry,” Dean said, then nodded to his brother and started walking in the direction of the parking lot, Cas following right behind him.

+

“So, yer good now?” Bobby asked over the phone. He had called Dean while they had been trying to do some grocery shopping for their trip to Sintra the next day, but Cas had kept getting distracted by every stupid shit he had seen along the way. The last time Dean had seen him had been with a strangely looking plate an aisle away, but when Dean had managed to get there, Cas had already been gone.

“Yeah, I mean unless I won’t murder him when I finally find him in this damn place,” Dean muttered, navigating his cart through the store.

He heard Bobby’s chuckle at the other end of the line. “I hope that's what all of yer worries will be like in this relationship.”

Well, it wasn't his only worry, but surely Dean wasn’t going to whine to his dad that he was a little uncomfortable hugging his boyfriend in public.

“It’s good to hear yer better, boy,” Bobby added after a beat.

Dean couldn’t help but smile. “Thanks,” he said. “Are you gonna visit us soon? You haven’t seen Lin yet, Grandpa.”

“I was actually hoping you’d all come to us, this time. Thanksgiving is just around the corner and you could take yer boys with you. I know they’re probably not exactly celebrating, but perhaps it would be interesting for Jack to see what it looks like, y’know?”

Dean halted his cart. It wasn’t a bad idea to take Jack and Cas to Bobby’s and introduce them to his old man and the rest of the family. It obviously meant flying there by plane, but since Cas would be by his side, Dean should be fine.

“I hear you,” Dean finally said, leaning his forearms on the cart. “It sounds good,” he said, then frowned. “Wait, I think I didn’t actually tell you that, but they’re both vegan. We can’t just butcher a turkey and invite them for family dinner, Bobby,” Dean added, wincing. 

“Vegan? What's that exactly?” Bobby asked.

“No meat and dairy products - eggs, milk, stuff like that,” Dean responded.

“Well, damn…” Bobby muttered. “I know jack squat about it, kid, but I’ll talk with Ellen. I’d like you all to come. Perhaps she can figure something out.”

“I mean, I could help prepare everything. I’ve gotten pretty good at cooking vegan stuff by now.”

Bobby grumbled something under his breath. “You started eating like that, too?” He finally asked.

Dean sighed. “When I'm with them, I eat with them, too. What's the point of preparing two separate meals, Bobby?”

“Well, when you put it like that…” his old man grumbled. “Alright. Let’s get back to it later. Say hello to yer boy from me,” he added before they said their goodbyes.

Dean shook his head. It was somewhat amusing that his dad hadn’t freaked out that his son liked dicks now, but had a hard time accepting Dean might eat tofu instead of a chicken. He sighed again, looking at the screen of his phone. A few days ago he had set his wallpaper to a photo of himself, Cas, and Jack from their first walk in Porto. It never failed to make him smile. 

A sudden voice cut through the air, startling him.

“I’ve found a blanket with a bee on it,” Cas stated happily, waving said blanket. It was blue and looked soft. “Did something happen?” He asked a beat later, observing Dean’s face with a frown.

“Nah,” Dean responded, taking the blanket from Cas’s hand and putting it inside of the cart. “I spoke with Bobby, he said ‘hi’,” he added, then reached for Cas’s hand before he could chicken out. “You’re not wandering anywhere again, Angel. C’mon, we don’t have anything to put on the bread yet.”

The shop was a very public place, so as soon as their fingers met, Dean instantly felt nervous. He discreetly looked around, but didn’t spot anyone observing them, so he started pushing the cart forward, pulling Castiel along with him.

Dean never thought of himself as a brave person. He had plenty of doubts and apprehensions, and he was aware that his hesitations had been born from years of conditioning and societal norms, only fueled by the distant memory of his upbringing. Even though he desperately longed for Cas’s closeness, it wasn’t exactly easy to simply forget about all of his fears overnight. That said, Dean knew that if he wanted this relationship thing to last, he should start behaving like a normal, functioning adult, not a scared, skittish gazelle.

“Dean, do you think you could stop squeezing my hand so tightly?” Cas asked quietly, bringing Dean’s attention back to him. “I’m almost positive you managed to stop the blood flow by now,” Cas added with a small smirk.

“Shit, sorry,” Dean responded, releasing the grip he didn’t realize he had tightened.

Cas tilted his head and narrowed his eyes at him. “You seem troubled. What’s going on?”

“Absolutely nothing,” Dean said, then started steering the cart to the shelves with vegan stuff, hoping that Cas would just let this go.

No such luck, apparently.

“Dean, wait,” Cas said, placing his hand on Dean’s and stopping the cart. “Did Bobby say something that upset you?”

“No.”

“Okay, then what’s wrong? You look quite stressed today.” Cas asked, focusing all of his attention on Dean. 

Shit.

Yeah, no, there was no way Castiel would just let it slide now. Dean knew him long enough to know that Cas wasn't going to let Dean off the hook so easily.

I guess we really have to talk, Dean thought, suddenly pissed at Charlie, for no good reason at all. 

“Okay,” he finally said. “Can we uh… not do it here?” He asked carefully, looking around. Talking about all this in the aisle between bread and cheese didn’t seem like the best idea ever.

Cas frowned, but nodded, saying, “Of course.” He shot Dean a reassuring smile, then let go of his hand. Dean almost instantly missed the heat of Cas's touch, because he was apparently hopeless like that.

Thirty minutes later, when they finally managed to park in front of Cas’s house and Dean turned the engine off, he felt Cas's steady gaze on his face. Dude was crazy patient, Dean had to give him that. Throughout the whole ride back, Cas had just sat there, waiting for Dean to finally get his shit together and open his damn mouth.

“Right, okay,” Dean said a moment later, turning his body in Cas's direction. Castiel looked a little tense now, even though he was hiding it pretty well, with his hands lying on his thighs and a small smile formed on his lips. God, if Dean wasn’t such a mess, they wouldn’t even have to go through this stupid conversation. He cleared his throat. “I'm uh… not great with the talking part, but you probably know this by now,” he started, looking at the steering wheel. He wasn’t even sure how to say stuff he was thinking about out loud, let alone explain why his brain wanted to jump into full panic mode imagining kissing Cas in front of people that weren’t his family or close friends. Poor guy had probably thought he would get a normal person for a boyfriend, and got a ‘Dating Dean Winchester’s Miserable Ass Experience’ instead. Dean shifted in his seat, then glanced back up.

Castiel’s eyes got big and worried now.

Oh fuck.

“It’s not what you’re thinking,” Dean said quickly, reaching for Cas’s hand. “Whatever it is, it’s not… that. It’s, uh…” he said, rubbing his thumb over Cas's knuckles. “Okay. I’m just… gonna say it, I guess. I’m still nervous about us touching and doing stuff in public,” he finally admitted. “I know it’s stupid, especially since I’m very into, well, you… and uh… things we do together. And don’t get me wrong, I wanna do it. I want to hold your hand while we go shopping and uh… hug you, I just need more time to get used to it,” he ended nervously.

“Oh,” Cas said, visibly relaxing in his seat. “I see,” he added. “That’s… well, it’s completely understandable, Dean.”

Dean frowned. “Is it?”

Cas sent him a small smile. “Yes. Truth be told, I was quite surprised you just jumped right into it all without having any doubts whatsoever. It's okay to have them," he said, his tone softening with understanding. 

“I don’t have doubts,” Dean countered.

Cas tilted his head. “You just told me you do.”

“No, I didn't.”

Cas’s eyes narrowed slightly. “Alright. What I meant to say was, I don’t want you to do things that make you uncomfortable. And before you start arguing with me, which you probably wanted to do just now,” he added, raising his eyebrow before Dean could say anything else, “remember that I care about you, very much, and I don’t want you to constantly push yourself to your limits. You tend to do it, by the way.”

“No, I don’t-”

“Yes, you do, Dean,” Cas said, a grin slowly forming on his lips. “But you don't have to do it with me.”

Dean briefly considered maintaining his defensive stance, but Cas’s steady, blue gaze drained the fight out of him. He let a small smile bloom on his own face, then leaned a little closer to Castiel. "Okay, fine," he conceded. "But I want to try stuff with you, sunshine. I just need to learn how to stop freaking out about it. My brain kinda freezes when other people see us. How else am I gonna get used to it if we stop touching altogether?” 

Castiel didn't respond right away. He observed Dean for a moment before he moved closer, putting his hand on Dean’s thigh. “I’ve got an idea. Every time you feel like giving it a try in public, just let me know. I’ll make sure you won’t get overwhelmed,” he said, grinning a little wider. If Dean wasn’t so focused on Cas’s scent and the shape of his lips, he would probably admit that the idea was, indeed, pretty good.

“Wow, you’re great with pep-talk, m-" Dean started, but the rest of the sentence was interrupted by a tongue slipping deep in between his lips.

Going slow, my ass, he thought, opening his mouth and chasing Cas’s tongue with his. 

As he closed his eyes, Dean quickly found himself lost in the heat rapidly rising between them. Kissing Castiel was so damn fine , just on the good side of rough, with all the fingers brushing Dean’s skin and a little bit of teeth here and there. He was vaguely aware that they were still technically in a semi-public place, but it felt very unimportant at that moment. All of his worries seemed to melt away under Cas’s skillful touch, chasing off the tension Dean had felt during the whole day.

It suddenly dawned on Dean that even if his brain still struggled with openly showing affection towards Castiel in front of other people, he sure as hell wasn’t scared of being intimate with him when there were only two of them. Not only had his fear in this department dissipated into thin air, but it had been replaced by very different feelings - feelings like lust, longing, and desire.

Hunger, even.

I want to have it all , Dean thought, pulling Cas closer to himself.

He wanted Cas's mouth and hands all over his body. He wanted sweet kisses, soft moans, and heavy breaths on his skin. Gentle touches in the bedroom and rough fucking, bent over the table. And he wanted to do the same to Cas, feel his skin under his tongue and fingertips. Taste all of him, make him feel good.

He wanted absolutely everything, as long as he could have it with Castiel.

He had, however, a vague feeling that the driver's seat of his Mustang, parked in front of Cas’s house, wasn’t the ideal place to start the happy exploration.

“Cas,” he managed to groan before his boyfriend’s lips silenced him again. Dean really, really didn’t want to stop. It didn’t help that Cas had almost crawled up onto his lap by now, squeezing Dean between the seat and his car’s door. The pressure in his pants started to get very uncomfortable. 

“Cas,” Dean tried again, his voice pleading. “Cas, please…” he whined.

Reluctantly, Cas pulled away, his cheeks tinted pink and his pupils slightly dilated. He was panting heavily, observing Dean with a hungry look.

Dean swallowed hard. “I can’t believe I’m doing this,” he muttered under his breath, then closed his eyes, trying to calm himself down.

Cas shifted slightly in Dean's arms. “Dean?” he said, his voice deeper than usual.

Dean winced. He had never found it so difficult to remain a responsible adult and a gentleman at the same time.

“It’s a little too much for a makeout session in a car,” he quickly breathed out before he could change his mind. He knew he wouldn’t last very long with this resolve if Castiel kept kissing him like there was no tomorrow.

Dean opened his eyes just in time to see Cas’s panicked gaze. “You’re right,” he said, still catching his breath. He looked around, then glanced back at Dean. “Shit,” he chuckled, then put his forehead on Dean’s shoulder

Dean ran his hand across his face, then gently stroked Cas’s back. After a moment, Castiel pulled himself away. His cheeks were still a little pink. Dean's lips tingled. He was regretting his decision already.

“I'm sorry. I lost my head for a moment,” Cas said with a smile, searching Dean’s face with a soft gaze. 

“Stop apologizing,” Dean murmured with a grin. “It was great.”

Cas smiled back at him shyly, then looked in the direction of his apartment. “Do you want to come in and say ‘hi’ to Jack?” He asked, tilting his head.

Dean glanced at his crotch, then back at Castiel. He raised his eyebrow. “I think I'll pass, sweetheart,” he said, still grinning. “I probably shouldn't stand up for a moment.”

Cas chuckled, then nodded, reaching for Dean’s hand. “Are you alright?” He asked after a beat.

“Oh, I’m awesome,” Dean replied. “You?”

Cas hummed. “Me, too,” he said, then leaned forward, placing a sweet kiss on Dean’s lips. “I’ll go now, before we start kissing again,” he murmured when he pulled away. “I’ll see you tomorrow. Have a safe drive back home, Dean,” he added before stepping out of the car. Dean watched him until he disappeared inside the building.

A stupid smile didn't leave Dean's face for the whole drive to his house.

And if he stayed a little bit longer under the water stream in the shower, it was nobody’s business but his own, thank you very much. 

+

The morning was cool, but still pleasant, with a hint of autumn floating in the air. Dean woke up early to prepare breakfast, coffee, and snacks for their trip, then put on his favorite flannel shirt and his black jacket, adding an extra layer of warmth. He also decided to wear his favorite, brown boots - they were planning to do a lot of walking today, so it was only logical to put on comfortable shoes.

Opening the trunk, he carefully stowed away the bee blanket and food in the backpack, ensuring everything was ready for their trip. When he slid into the driver's seat and the Mustang's engine roared to life, he felt a sense of anticipation.

Dean really liked driving. It was the second-best means of transportation, right after sailing on Baby. He loved the wind coming through the open window, tousling his hair, and the simple pleasure of being behind the wheel, on the open road. And even if Sintra wasn't incredibly far, the scenery along the way was quite charming, so Dean was very eager to show it all to Cas and Jack.

As he pulled up to their house, he saw them already waiting in the driveway. Jack waved happily to him, while Cas - wearing dark green pants and a gray shirt, paired with his faux leather jacket - smiled softly. He had a duffel bag in his hand, which was completely understandable since they had earlier agreed they would spend the rest of the weekend at Dean's apartment.

Dean grinned, then parked parallel to the sidewalk. 

“Hey, Dean!” Jack greeted him, taking a seat on the back. 

“Hiya, kid. How did you two sleep?” He asked, observing as Cas slid into the seat next to him, tossing the duffel bag to the back of the car.

“Good, but I couldn't wait for the trip,” Jack responded, leaning on the backrests of the front seats. 

“He woke up at 5,” Cas muttered, glancing at Dean. His eyes looked a bit tired and his voice seemed a tad raspy.

Dean snorted, then pulled Castiel into a short, closed-mouth kiss. Cas smelled a little like his mint toothpaste.

“Alright. Buckle up so we can finally go,” Dean said, then leaned to his glove compartment in search of his sunglasses and some music. When he touched the box with tapes, however, Castiel stopped him, then pulled out his mixtape from the inside pocket of his jacket and slid it into the slot of the radio. It started in the middle, with Zepp’s ‘The Ocean’. Dean grinned, putting his sunglasses on, then nodded to the beat and reached for the coffee nestled in the holder.

“Here. Your happy potion,” he said, handing the travel mug to Cas, who accepted it with a wide grin. Then, Dean turned the engine back on. “Let's go see some castles.”

+

Three hours later they spotted the hills on which Sintra was situated. The sky was clear, so they could easily see the colorful Pena Palace rising above the trees. Dean could hear Jack gasping in awe from the back seat. The 19th-century building was very spectacular and exotic indeed, but Dean planned to take Jack there only after seeing the much older Castle of the Moors, located on the nearby mountain. It wasn't that spectacular, but it would allow them to admire the panorama of the entire city and see the Pena Palace from a different perspective.

“Time for a little hike, guys,” Dean said once he parked the car in the nearest place to the castle he could find. When Cas and Jack stepped out of the Mustang, Dean moved to the trunk and took out the backpack with snacks, putting it on. Then, he reached for Cas's hand. Castiel raised his eyebrow, but intertwined their fingers and let himself be pulled in the direction of a path leading into the woods.

They steadily made their way up, surrounded by tall trees filtering the sunlight. Jack quickly took the lead, visibly excited with every clearing in the branches, revealing more and more of the city below. They passed a few tourists along the way, but no one seemed to pay them much attention.

Dean soon discovered his muscles were not exactly ready for such an activity, and the higher they got, the faster he breathed. Castiel, who seemed completely unfazed by their walk, kept sending Dean amused looks.

The terrain gradually changed to more rugged and rocky, forcing them to watch their footing. Fortunately, Jack and Cas stopped along the way to admire some flowers and birds, allowing Dean to catch a breather from time to time.

When they finally reached the stone walls of the castle situated at the top of the hill, Dean's lungs burned and beads of sweat covered his forehead. He had stripped from his jacket and his flannel shirt already, but he still felt overheated.

“Are you alright?” Castiel asked him after Jack had run to the archway leading into the castle grounds.

“I'll live,” Dean breathed out.

“You look a little too tired considering the distance we've just walked,” Cas said, furrowing his brow. “Sit down and drink some water.”

Dean nodded, then sat on the nearby rock, while Cas rummaged through the backpack in search of a drink. Dean had to admit that Castiel had been right - his body was acting pretty strange.

“Here,” Cas said, handing the bottle. “Are you feeling any better?” He asked after Dean took a few sips.

“Yeah,” Dean responded, observing as Jack ran back to them. 

“We need to buy tickets,” the boy chirped excitedly before his eyes landed on Dean. “Are you okay?” He asked with a frown.

Dean nodded again and smiled a little. “I am, don’t worry. Let’s see the damn castle.”

As they finally stepped on the castle grounds, Dean soon forgot about his unusual tiredness, absorbed in the views that unfolded from the narrow staircases and sweeping terraces. The majestic landscapes never ceased to captivate him, no matter how many times he had visited the hilltop fortress. Cas and Jack seemed to agree with him, judging by the amount of photos both of them were taking.

“Is this the castle we’re going to visit next?” Jack asked with wide eyes once they climbed the highest tower of the citadel. The weather was so fine that they could not only see the Pena Palace, but also the Atlantic Ocean, gleaming in the distance.

“Yep,” Dean confirmed, grinning at the boy.

“This is so cool! It looks like Toussaint from ‘The Witcher’,” Jack exclaimed, looking around.

Castiel glanced at his son, then at Dean, raising his eyebrow. “Toussaint?” he asked, stepping next to Dean.

“Yeah, it’s from a game we’ve been playing. It’s a place that looks straight out of a fairy tale,” Dean explained, discreetly intertwining his fingers with Cas’s. 

Castiel hummed. “It does look fairy-like,” He murmured, observing the palace. “Thank you for taking us here,” he added in a hushed tone.

“No problem, Cas,” Dean said. He was probably blushing again, but he decided he didn’t care anymore. He also very much wanted to kiss Cas, but plenty of people were surrounding them now, so he decided to do the second-best thing that came to his mind instead. “I want another photo of the three of us,” he said, pulling out his phone. “Hey, Jack? Come here.”

Cas asked a pair of tourists for assistance in Portuguese. They lined up against the backdrop of Pena Palace, with Dean in the middle this time. He hugged Jack and Cas closely on either side and looked at the camera, thinking that he couldn't remember a time in his life when he had been happier than he was at this very moment.

His smile widened.

+

“It looks like a muffin,” Cas muttered under his breath once they approached the entrance of Pena Palace an hour and a half later. “Or a cake. I can’t decide.”

Dean snorted beside him, causing a group of people listening to their guide - including Jack - to turn their heads in his direction. Dean quickly schooled his face, then shot a smirking Castiel an annoyed look. Cas only shrugged his shoulders, then narrowed his eyes at the statue of Triton, sitting atop a grand archway. 

“It’s a sea god,” he whispered to Dean, drawing his attention. Dean followed his gaze, focusing on the creature that appeared to be half man, half octopus, sitting on a large shell.

“Man, those are definitely not the tentacles that appear in my dreams,” Dean whispered back, vaguely recalling his mom’s paper about the Greek god Triton, who was usually represented as a merman.

Cas squinted at him. “Tentacles? What do they do?”

“Y’know… Stuff?” Dean said with a playful grin.

Castiel tilted his head, then leaned a little closer. “I'm having a strangest feeling that you're talking about sex,” he whispered.

“What can I say, I'm just a simple guy,” Dean chuckled quietly and sent Cas a wink, for good measure.

Cas's intense gaze pinned Dean in place. He studied Dean’s face for a moment, causing Dean to squirm uncomfortably. Then, after a brief pause, he finally smirked. "I think you are everything but simple, Dean Winchester," he muttered straight into Dean’s ear before following their guide into the courtyard, leaving Dean at a loss for words.

The castle was definitely extravagant - Cas wasn't exactly wrong about it looking like a dessert. With all the colors, marble, and tiles, it reminded Dean more of the palace that belonged to a Disney princess, rather than an actual, existing place. Cas seemed mesmerized by the meticulously decorated ceilings, while Jack had a really hard time leaving the arches of Manueline Cloister behind. 

When the tour reached the royal chambers, Dean started to slowly drift away and soon, the guide's voice seemed like a humming noise in the distance. After a few minutes, Cas tugged on the sleeve of Dean's flannel shirt, trying to discreetly pull him in the direction of the room they had seen a moment ago with the whole group. Dean observed his innocent look for a second before he nodded, then slowly followed Castiel, trying to not attract any attention to himself. Luckily, Jack seemed immersed in the guide’s words enough to not notice what they were doing.

They didn’t go very far. Between the rooms, right behind the door, there was an alcove that Dean suddenly found himself squeezed into. Cas followed him, pressing their bodies together, then looked up. The whole castle was naturally full of cameras, but this little secluded spot, strategically chosen by Castiel, seemed to be completely free of them. Cas glanced back at him. “We’ve got 30 seconds,” he whispered, leaning forward with a mischievous grin. Dean felt a thrill running down his spine as the gap closed and their lips clashed together. He leaned his head against the wall and closed his eyes, pulling Cas along by his neck and licking right into his mouth. With the time limit, they had to make every second count. They moved their lips in almost perfect sync, rapidly exploring each other's mouths with their tongues.

Sadly, as Castiel had announced earlier, the kiss didn’t last very long. Dean couldn’t suppress a soft moan that escaped from his throat as Cas pulled away, lightly nibbling his lower lip.

“Shh,” Cas hushed him with a grin. A beat later, a new group with a guide appeared in the room behind Cas’s back. 

Dean raised his eyebrow. “How did you know how much time we have?” he murmured, but Cas didn’t answer, grinning at Dean a little wider. He slowly pulled away, motioning for Dean to follow him, then steered himself back to the room from which they came, where their guide was now wrapping up the story of some king's unhappy marriage.

+

After they ate dinner at the local restaurant, Dean took them to the incredibly picturesque Quinta da Regaleira, which Jack quickly called 'The New Rivendell.' The property had been owned by a very rich dude back in the day who happened to be so much into mystical stuff that he had ordered the construction of two Initiation Wells with spiral staircases, going quite deep into the ground. As it was easy to predict, both Castiel and Jack were instantly hooked on the spooky history of those constructions, given that the wells, which had never served as a water supply, had been possibly used for some kind of dark rituals. When Jack discovered that the wells were connected with a system of tunnels and caves, he almost burst with happiness.

Throughout the day, Dean realized that each time he reached for Cas’s hand, it became easier, and he found himself gradually feeling more relaxed. It was almost as if being with Castiel was slowly overriding a reflex to hide his attraction, retrieve his hand, and stand a little bit further.

As closing time approached and the sun began to slowly move towards the nearby hills, Dean ordered a retreat and took them back to the car. Jack looked very tired, but expressed his eagerness to explore further, so Dean suggested seeing the last attraction that was still open at that time - Cabo da Roca, which was the westernmost point of continental Europe, making it probably the best spot to see a sunset. 

Once Dean parked the car near the coast and turned around, he saw Jack struggling to keep his eyes open.

“We can go back home if you want, bud,” Dean said, furrowing his brow.

“No, I’d really like to see the sunset,” Jack answered with a yawn.

Dean chuckled, then glanced at Castiel. He looked tired as well, but he smiled and nodded.

“Awesome. You guys can totally go to sleep on our way back,” Dean said, then got out of the car, leading all of them to the edge of the cliff.

Before their eyes, the sky slowly morphed into vibrant pink and purple. The setting sun cast an orange glow on the ocean below, turning the steady waves hitting the rocky shore a golden hue. Jack perked up at the view and pulled out his phone, ready to document their surroundings again. 

Dean looked around. It was a pleasant, Saturday evening, so the place was quite understandably swarming with people, especially couples. Dean spotted even two queer ones, so he figured that holding Cas's hand here wouldn't attract too much attention. He slipped his hand into Cas’s palm, getting a sweet smile from Castiel in return.

The problem was, his body clearly ached for more, urging him to just do something with it . Dean battled himself for a moment before he finally decided that the craving was too strong to just ignore and he finally gave in, pulling Cas closer.

“What are you doing?” Cas murmured, but Dean didn’t respond, proceeding to plaster Cas’s back to his chest. “Are you sure?” Castiel asked quietly, when Dean put his forehead on Cas’s shoulder, trying to calm down his racing heartbeat.

“Yeah. Shut up,” he whispered back. He heard Cas’s low hum resonating in his chest, then felt him intertwining their fingers together. The warmth of Cas’s body shielded him against the chill of the evening air.

“Alright,” Castiel sighed after a beat. He started gently playing with Dean’s fingers and the touch seemed to help Dean finally relax in their embrace. When he raised his head back up, he saw that Castiel was observing the striking colors of the clouds. “It brings back memories, doesn’t it?” Cas asked quietly.

Wadden Sea, Dean instantly thought. ‘The Rain Song’.

He smiled, hooking his chin on Cas’s shoulder. “We’ve gotta sail again, Cas,” he said softly, basking in the stormy scent. “You, Jack, and me.”

Castiel hummed, then fell silent for a moment. “We could sail to Madeira on New Year’s Eve,” he suddenly said. “We need about four or five days to get there, give or take. The weather should be nice around this time.”

Dean’s eyes widened. “You checked it?”

“I did,” Cas rumbled. “I miss sailing with you, too,” he added quietly after a beat. “The idea of us spending more time together like this sounds incredible.”

The sudden surge of emotions flooding him felt almost too much for Dean’s little, fragile heart to handle. Once again, he found himself terrified of the power Castiel held over him. He felt so very weak and uncertain, completely at the mercy of another human being. 

Yet, at the same time, Dean was filled with hope, and so much love, that he never would’ve thought he was even capable of feeling. It was filling him to the brim, coursing through his veins and seizing his senses; tightening his throat and making his heart beat faster.

“Guys, look at the camera,” Jack suddenly said, his phone raised in his hand and pointed at them. Dean, pulled out of his thoughts, smiled at the boy, pressing Cas a little closer to himself. 

As the shutter clicked, Dean realized that this was exactly what he had been missing in his previous relationships. He felt not only wanted, but also understood and seen, free to just be himself without the need to pretend. As strange as it sounded, Cas had simply accepted Dean as he was.

He took a deep breath, then leaned in, deciding that showing Cas how much he meant to him was more important than his stupid fears of PDA. He wanted to plant a kiss on Cas’s cheek, but apparently, Castiel had a similar idea. They both moved at the same time, turning their faces and resulting in a gentle bump of their noses. Dean chuckled, then let Cas take the lead while drowning in the ocean of his eyes. Castiel smiled, searching Dean’s face for permission. When Dean nodded, Cas slowly closed the remaining distance, tenderly connecting their lips in a gentle kiss. Dean sighed in contentment.

Neither of them wanted it to be heated, not really - after all, they were standing in a very public place and had a kid with them. But it was meaningful, a silent means of communication that didn't require words. It felt almost like a promise.

Dean could hear another click in the distance, but didn't pay it much attention.

+

They didn’t even manage to leave the city of Sintra before Jack fell asleep in the backseat of the car. It happened almost instantly after Cas had covered him with a bee blanket. The boy sure had been exhausted.

Cas and Dean rode back in silence, holding hands between the front seats. Dean was certain that Castiel would eventually doze off, but he kept tenderly caressing Dean's palm throughout the entire journey to Porto instead. The touch grounded Dean and calmed his senses.

When they finally arrived at Dean's place, Cas woke Jack up and guided him to the guest bedroom to put him to sleep in an actual bed. Meanwhile, Dean gathered everything they had left behind in the car and carried it to his apartment. He then headed upstairs to take a quick shower. He had started to feel a bit cold a while ago, which he hoped would go away under the stream of warm water.

Once Dean was clean and wearing sweatpants and a new T-shirt, he left the bathroom, only to bump right into Castiel’s chest on his way out. Cas looked a little startled at first, but he quickly smiled and put his hands on Dean’s waist.

“I thought you’d gone to bed already,” Dean said quietly, pulling Cas a little closer.

“Not yet. I actually wanted to talk with you for a moment,” Castiel whispered back. “Don’t worry, it’s nothing bad,” he added when he spotted a frown forming on Dean’s face.

“Oh, okay. We can talk,” Dean said with a grin, leaning a little closer to Cas. With Jack now asleep, they were completely alone for the first time in a whole day, and Dean couldn’t quite forget the heat of the kiss Castiel had shared with him in the Pena Palace. He really wanted to return the favor, especially since Cas’s cheeks had this nice, rosy color again and his lips were slightly parted.

And Dean? Well, Dean was only human, so when he saw Cas’s pink tongue dancing impatiently in his mouth, he decided the talk could possibly wait a few more minutes without the world coming to an end.

Cas observed him with a small smile, following Dean’s eyes.

Almost every time they had kissed before, Castiel had somehow managed to catch Dean off guard. Dean didn’t want it to stay that way. He had promised to sweep Castiel off his feet, so he should finally deliver. 

Talking was never his forte, but this, Dean knew well. He gently pushed Cas’s chest, leaning his head against the nearest wall - a support for any possible knee weakness that Dean hoped would occur. Then, he grasped Cas’s chin with one hand and his neck with the other, feeling the excitement slowly overwhelming him. He brought his mouth even closer, slightly tilting Cas's head.

Just before Dean closed his eyes, he noticed a sparkle in Cas’s blue gaze. 

I’ll never get tired of this, Dean thought as he tenderly touched Cas’s lips with his, moving his hand from Cas’s chin to his back. 

Dean's mind went instantly quiet, and for a moment, all the world around them fell away. He focused all of his attention and desires on one person, one man with a very deep voice, killer biceps, and shitty eyesight, standing in his embrace. When he touched Cas’s lower lip with the tip of his tongue, he felt his boyfriend trembling in his arms.

Good, Dean thought. Let me do the same thing you do to me. Let me take your breath away.

Dean focused on every lip separately, giving them proper attention and love. He gently sucked on the lower, then traced the upper one with the tip of his tongue. When Cas’s lips started to slowly part, Dean steadily licked his way deep inside of Cas's mouth. He didn’t have to wait long for Cas’s reciprocation. Castiel very eagerly put his tongue forward, meeting Dean’s in the middle and deepening the kiss. Soon, they moved in perfect harmony, each adapting to the other's rhythm, as if they had been doing it for years. Castiel smelled amazing and felt absolutely divine, setting all of Dean’s nerves on fire and pushing his senses into overdrive.

It was addictive to kiss like that. Like the world around them didn't matter, or even exist. All that mattered were the things they were sharing with each other right now - the impatient, quiet groans, incredibly soft touches, and the sweetness of their mouths. Surrendering to those sensations and losing himself in the fervent kiss of someone he loved was the best feeling in the world, Dean decided. 

Oh, shit, we’re gonna fuck against a wall, his brain provided a few moments later, as Cas’s hand slowly moved down to Dean's ass. He knew that Castiel could clearly feel his dick now, as tightly as they were pressed against one another there was no real way to hide it. Dean could tell that Cas was very interested as well, his cock firm against Dean's thigh. In the back of his head, he realized that there had been an idea to wait to have sex, but for the life of him, Dean couldn't remember why they had agreed to it in the first place. 

Once Cas placed his other hand on Dean’s ass and squeezed it gently, every coherent thought left Dean’s brain. He grabbed Cas’s thigh and pulled it up, leaning his hips even closer, then slowly moved from kissing Cas's lips to nibbling on his jaw. When Dean grazed Cas's neck with his teeth, Cas stifled a moan.

Maybe I could carry him to bed? Dean thought while sucking on the spot that seemed to drive Cas crazy, but almost immediately remembered just how broad Cas's chest was exactly. 

Yeah, no, Dean had to hit this gym. Fast.

“Dean,” he heard Cas's deep, breathless voice as he was trying to establish if he had any condoms left in the drawer of his bedside table.

Dean slowly pulled away from the heat, panting heavily. “Yeah?” He rasped, leaning his forehead on Cas's, his eyes closed. He could feel Cas's pulse racing beneath the skin on his neck.

"Dean, I think I might have misjudged our abilities in maintaining a slow pace," Cas breathed out. His voice was so low and raspy that Dean hardly distinguished the words Cas was saying. 

Dean opened his eyes and slightly pulled himself away.

“Um…” he managed to mumble, searching Cas’s face with a small frown. Castiel looked disheveled, but there was no trace of discomfort or any other negative emotion in his handsome features. He looked rather amused than anything else. 

When Dean failed to put a full sentence together for another few seconds, still visibly struggling to catch his breath, Cas tilted his head to the side and let a small smile bloom on his face.

“We should really have that talk now,” he finally said, glancing between Dean’s eyes.

“Dude, why are you so coherent? My brain almost fried here,” Dean whined. 

Cas’s smile only widened. “I’m just good at keeping my emotions in check. I can assure you, I’m very into everything that we do,” he said, suddenly pressing Dean’s hips to his. Dean groaned, putting his forehead on Cas’s shoulder as their dicks aligned together and a wave of pleasure surged through his whole body.

“Yeah… yeah, okay,” Dean managed to finally pant. “Just… give me a second here.”

God, the blue balls were going to kill him today.

Cas hummed, then moved his hands on Dean’s back and soon began to gently trace soothing patterns beneath Dean’s shoulder blades. Dean could feel the frustration slowly leaving him under the warmth of Cas’s touch.

A few beats later, Dean raised his head back up.

Cas, still leaning on the wall behind him, put a hand on Dean’s cheek. “Are you okay?” He asked with a small smile. 

Dean still felt horny and a little confused by the turn of events, so he responded with a smirk, “Define ‘okay’ for me?”

Cas snorted, causing Dean to start laughing too.

“You might have a point,” Cas said when he managed to calm down a bit. “Come on, let’s move it to your bedroom. We’re going to be more comfortable on the bed.”

Dean sighed, then nodded, and finally pulled himself away from Castiel, leading him to his room, and turning on just the bedside lamp. He had a massive boner, so when he took off his sweatpants, he decided to quickly hide it under the blanket. Seeing this, Cas only chuckled, then stripped down to his underwear, removing his pants and shirt. He was hard too, but he didn’t seem to particularly care that Dean was aware of it.

“Alright, let’s talk,” Dean said when Cas finally settled beside him.

Castiel observed him for a moment, then sighed and took Dean's hand in his. “Let me start by saying that I really want to have sex with you,” he said, smiling a little wider.

Dean almost snorted. “I mean, I thought that part was kinda clear by now, considering the, uh, wall situation.”

Cas hummed and slowly nodded. “Good. Before we start having sex, however, I’d like us both to get tested,” he said, rubbing his thumb over Dean's knuckles. “I’m clean and I believe that you are too, but it’s very important to stay safe.”

Dean’s mouth formed an ‘O’. Of course, they should run a blood test before getting naked. Dean had undergone a full STD panel a few years back, and he had always used protection, but it was sure as hell better to stay safe than sorry.

“Fuck, you’re right,” he finally said, looking away. He suddenly felt very stupid. “Why didn't I think of that sooner?” He muttered under his breath, then yelped, when Cas suddenly pulled him by the hand he was still holding and pressed Dean’s cheek to his chest, maneuvering them both further under the covers.

“I can see that you somehow managed to already convince yourself that you’re responsible for absolutely everything, which is certainly not true, and also something I really wanted to avoid,” he rumbled, narrowing his eyes at Dean. “Stop it.”

Dean rolled his eyes, then settled comfortably on Cas’s chest. “Shut up,” he muttered, locking his eyes with Cas’s. “We’ll go and run the blood test, first thing on Monday,” he added, then raised his eyebrow. “And uh… assuming we’re both perfectly healthy, what happens next?”

Castiel observed him for a moment, then gently touched his lips with his pointing finger. “What do you want to happen?” He asked, retrieving his hand.

Well, that was easy. 

“Everything,” Dean said quietly.

Cas smiled, then stroked Dean's bottom lip with his thumb. “Alright. But we should discuss every step of this ‘everything’ of yours first,” he said, then chuckled when he saw Dean pulling a face. “Oh my…,” he sighed. “We will talk, Dean, or I simply won’t have sex with you. I strongly believe that if you’re not ready to talk about it, you’re definitely not ready to do it.”

“Christ, you’re too responsible for your own good,” Dean grumbled. “Fine,” he added, then winced again when he saw Cas’s expectant look. “Like, right now?”

“Do you have anywhere else to be?” Cas asked, raising one eyebrow.

Dean rolled his eyes again. Cas obviously had a point, but it didn’t make talking about sex any easier. He sighed, deciding to rip off the Band-Aid. “Okay… So, uh… I’m down for handjobs, blowjobs, and all that, for sure,” he listed quietly, while Cas nodded. “I never had anal sex, but I want to try it. I mean, if you’re okay with that?” He asked weakly, feeling his cheeks getting hot. 

“Of course,” Cas murmured, smiling softly. “Are you interested in being only on top?”

“Uh… no, actually. I did try to uh… experiment a little under the shower,” Dean slowly admitted. “It was, well… I mean, it wasn’t bad, but I guess I must’ve done something wrong because I didn’t feel anything spectacular. But I know it can be nice, I just have no experience here, so I’m kinda counting on yours.”

There, he said it. If he was lucky enough, he wouldn’t have to do it ever again in his life.

Cas’s smile widened. “Thank you for telling me all this,” he said, caressing Dean’s cheek. “I’ll gladly guide you through things you want to try. And if you don't like something, we just won’t do it. Is that okay with you?”

“Yeah,” Dean muttered. Damn, Cas was nothing if not thorough. “What about you? What do you like?” Dean asked after a beat, shifting a little so he could see Castiel’s face better.

“I’m very much interested in everything you said. I think sex should be pleasurable for people participating in it, so as long as we’re both on board with something, we can try it,” Cas stated.

Dean snorted. It was probably the most evasive answer he had heard since he’d asked Bobby about contraception in the eighth grade. “C’mon, sweetheart. You can't seriously expect me to believe there is nothing you specifically like to do in bed.”

Cas suddenly started looking sheepish. He bit his lips. “I don't want you to feel uncomfortable,” he finally said, his eyes gleaming in the soft light of the lamp.

Dean smirked. “I think we’re past that, Angel,” he said, wondering if there even existed a line that Cas would be able to cross with his answer.

Castiel sighed before he finally spoke again. “Alright. In that case, I should be as honest with you as you were with me,” he started. “I prefer to be on top, if that's possible. Also, I was told a few times that I tend to be quite, um. In charge,” he said, looking anywhere but Dean. 

“In charge?” Dean repeated, mulling over Cas's words. “Like giving orders and stuff?”

“Sometimes,” Cas said carefully. “But only if you're okay with that. Like I said, I want it all to be consensual and pleasurable.”

That... well, that didn't sound bad at all. It also wasn't very surprising. Dean had always sensed a certain bossy vibe from Castiel, and he would be lying if he said he wasn't interested in exploring it further. Perhaps not exactly in a hardcore manner with nipple clamps and paddles, but it had always been a huge turn-on when Dean’s partners took the lead in bed. Besides, Dean might be wrong, but Cas didn't exactly seem like the kind of guy who had a sex dungeon in his basement.

“Okay. We can work with that,” Dean said with a smirk. He saw a grin forming on Cas’s lips in response.

“You are one of a kind, Dean,” Cas said, then slid his hand to Dean’s nape and started gently rubbing it. Dean had to suppress a groan. “Alright. Is there anything else you want to ask me?” Cas said after a beat.

Dean bit his lips, studying Cas’s face. “Actually, I do,” he responded. “How the fuck did you know we’ve got 30 seconds for a kiss in a Muffin Palace?” He asked, narrowing his eyes.

Castiel snorted. “You’re unbelievable,” he chuckled, then ran a hand across his face. “I observed the group that was following ours and counted how much time there was between us and them.”

“And you did all this just to kiss me for thirty seconds?”

“Are you complaining again?”

Dean grinned at him. “No.”

“Good,” Cas murmured, then raised his eyebrow. “I honestly thought you’d ask me a sex-related question.”

“Yeah, okay. Can you ride me at least once with your cowboy hat on?”

“Oh sweet heavens,” Cas shook his head, covering his eyes with his hand. “Yes,” he finally nodded, looking back at Dean. “I actually suspected you’ve got a little something going for cowboys.”

“Yeah, shut up,” Dean chuckled.

Cas smirked. “Okay, my turn,” he said.

“Is this some kind of weird version of ‘20 Questions’?”

“It sure is now. What kind of tentacles appear in your dreams, Dean?” Cas asked, narrowing his eyes.

Dean snorted, but then he realized Castiel had probably been completely serious. “Dude, hentai porn? Tentacle erotica?” He asked with a frown but was met with Cas’s blank stare. “Aliens with… with tentacles? Nothing? Man, you’re like a babe in the woods,” Dean muttered.

“Oh, I am a babe in the woods? That’s rich, coming from you, Dean,” Cas said, then grinned again. “You watch Japanese porn?”

“It’s… art,” Dean said weakly, feeling as his cheeks reddened again. “‘Sides, it’s my turn to ask a question,” he muttered.

“Of course,” Cas responded with a sweet smile.

“There is something I’ve been wondering for a while now,” Dean said. “When we were in Cuxhaven a few months ago, I could swear I felt your hand on my cheek,” he added, raising his eyebrow.

Cas’s eyes suddenly widened. “I thought you were already asleep,” he murmured. “I’m sorry. I just… I knew we were going to part the next day, and you were hurt. I really wanted to stay with you, but I had to go back. I was very frustrated.”

Dean smiled again, then put his hand on Cas’s chest. He could hear Castiel’s heart, beating steadily under his palm. “Don’t apologize, sweetheart. By that time I already fantasized about kissing you, at least,” he murmured. He had definitely fantasized about Cas’s dick by then, but Castiel didn’t have to know that . “Damn, I should’ve kissed you back then,” Dean added, admiring the different shades of blue in Cas’s eyes.

“I should’ve kissed you on Christiansø,” Castiel stated.

Dean’s smile widened. “Why didn’t you?”

“I was afraid you were straight.”

Dean snorted, and soon after, Cas joined in. God, they were both stupid, he thought, listening to Cas's muffled chuckle. They made an effort to suppress their laughter, mindful of not disturbing Jack's sleep. Eventually, their chuckles escalated into quiet giggles, leaving just wide smiles on their faces.

“Okay, I think it’s enough questions for one day,” Cas said when they finally managed to calm down.

“Yeah,” Dean admitted. “I’ve got one last question, though.”

Cas raised his eyebrow, prompting Dean to speak.

“Do you have a whip?”

“No. Why?”

“Not important,” Dean muttered quickly, reaching to turn off the bedside lamp. “Good night, sweetheart,” he whispered, placing a small kiss on Cas’s lips in the dark.

“Good night, Dean. Sweet dreams,” Castiel responded, pulling Dean closer to his chest.

Chapter Text

The sea was rough and the waves were hitting the hull hard, but Dean knew he had to hold on. Despite being hungry and so very tired, the long journey was finally coming to an end today. He could already see the familiar landscape of Ithaca on the horizon, slowly emerging from behind the fog. He knew he had to stay cautious, especially now, but he couldn’t quite contain his happiness.

After so many years of loneliness, he would actually see Castiel again. Against the odds, he managed to return home to his family.

Once he saw the shore and was able to distinguish all the people who came to greet him, Dean’s gaze started to search for familiar, ruffled hair and ocean-blue eyes. Cas had to be here, waiting for him with the rest of the people, right?

As he scanned the quay, he suddenly saw a crowd gathered around one figure, standing in the middle. Dean knew it was Castiel even before he spotted his sharp jaw and piercing gaze. He started shouting in his direction, but Cas didn’t seem to hear Dean. He was looking up at the sky, where the storm clouds started to form slowly. 

Dean tried to shout again but to no avail. He waved and jumped on his wooden boat, but nothing seemed to attract Cas’s attention - he was solely focused on the approaching storm. 

Suddenly, Dean’s boat stopped and all the wind died out completely. Dean frowned, then yelled Castiel’s name once again. 

This time, Cas looked at him, but before he noticed Dean’s boat, the crowd of people began to block his view. Everyone tried to touch him, stretching out their hands. Dean felt a heat of anger spreading all over his body. Frustrated, he jumped into the water and started swimming in Cas’s direction. He soon realized that he couldn’t actually get any closer.

He heard a rumble of thunder in the distance. It sounded strangely familiar. 

The first droplets hit the water around him.

After a moment of fruitless struggle, Dean’s limbs got incredibly heavy and every movement became painful. He tried to shout Cas’s name again, his voice broken and desperate. He felt an overwhelming wave of fear. No matter what he did, he couldn’t reach Castiel, he couldn’t get closer to him, his arms and legs weighing him down mercilessly. He knew he started to cry, but the intensifying rain was washing it off his face. 

He was going to lose everything.

Dean started to suffocate, swallowing his own tears running across his cheeks.

“Dean,” he suddenly heard Cas’s rumble from a distance. He turned his head in that direction, but couldn’t see a damn thing in the heavy rain.

“Cas?” He asked weakly.

“Dean, you have to wake up.”

Dean opened his eyes, panting heavily. His limbs felt like lead and his head hurt like a bitch. Everything around him seemed a little distorted. When he looked to his right, he saw Cas's worried face.

Dean breathed a sigh of relief. “You’re here.”

Cas frowned. “Of course I’m here, Dean,” he said, then put his palm on Dean’s forehead. It was blissfully cold. “You’re burning up,” he muttered, touching Dean’s cheek. “We should lower your temperature. Can you tell me where you keep your medications?” He asked calmly.

Dean's brain seemed a little fuzzy, but he nodded, licking his dry lips. “In the bathroom, under the sink,” he muttered weakly.

“Alright. Don’t move,” Cas ordered, placing a kiss on Dean’s forehead. Soon after, the mattress moved and Dean could hear light footsteps moving around the room. He drifted back to sleep a moment later.

Minutes, or maybe hours later, Dean saw Cas’s blurry silhouette hovering next to the bed. He was saying something about different medications, but Dean couldn’t really care less. Soon after, strong hands lifted him to a sitting position and Cas’s face became clearer.

He had such beautiful eyes.

Dean wanted to tell him just that, but his tongue felt too heavy in his mouth, so all that came out was a groan. God, his head was killing him.

“Open your mouth for me,” Castiel’s voice commanded. Dean obeyed and soon felt a mug pressing to his lower lip and a gentle hand supporting his head. The fluid that poured into his mouth felt warm on his tongue and tasted like an artificial lemon, but Dean was very thirsty, so he swallowed it all.

“Very good,” Cas praised him quietly. Dean wanted to smile, but his face didn’t cooperate. He was very tired again.

“Can you drink some water for me now?” Cas asked, bringing a glass to Dean’s lips. Dean took a sip, then another.

“The temperature should drop in a moment,” Cas said quietly, helping Dean to lay down again. “You look miserable,” he muttered, cupping Dean’s cheek.

“Gee… thanks,” Dean slurred, making Cas smile.

“Don’t worry, you are still very handsome,” Castiel said quietly, stroking Dean's cheek. “I gave you something for pain and fever. Try to rest now.”

Dean's limbs felt incredibly heavy, so rest felt like the only reasonable option at the moment, anyway. He closed his eyes. A moment later, he drifted off into nothingness.

He woke up to a strange feeling churning in his stomach, swirling and shifting his insides. Before he could fully comprehend what was happening, he rolled onto his side and retched violently on the floor. His body convulsed unpleasantly, bringing tears to his eyes. He winced in discomfort and groaned, panting heavily. 

“Dean?” He heard Cas’s voice from the hallway. He groaned again, closing his eyes. At least his head stopped pounding for now.

Cas’s worried face appeared in the doorway a second later. “Nausea? Shit, it doesn’t look like a normal cold,” he said, approaching the bed. Dean was too weak to stop him. 

Cas circled the puke, then sat down on the mattress and put a hand on Dean’s forehead. “Your temperature went down, at least,” he muttered, glancing between Dean’s eyes.

“Cas,” Dean breathed out. “I’m gross.”

Castiel raised his eyebrow at him. “You’re sick, Dean, and I will take care of you,” he said, cupping Dean’s cheek again.

Dean winced. “What if I infect you? What if I infect Jack?”

“Gabriel took Jack back to my place and I won’t leave you here alone,” Cas responded stubbornly. “I think I should call Benjamin and ask him if it’s normal that you vomited,” he muttered, searching Dean’s face.

“Are you fucking crazy? The douchebag would be thrilled if I actually died, Cas,” Dean grunted.

Castiel chuckled. “You’re cursing again. It’s a good sign,” he said with a smile. “How are you feeling?”

“Like garbage,” Dean responded truthfully.

Cas’s smile widened. “Like hungry garbage or nauseous garbage?”

Dean’s stomach dangerously turned. “No food,” he said weakly.

“Alright. But you have to drink water, at least. Can you do that for me?” Cas asked, and when Dean nodded, he brought a glass to Dean’s lips again. “Try drinking slowly,” Cas murmured.

Dean obeyed. The water flowed down his throat, leaving a blissful sensation on its way. When Cas put the glass back on the bedside table, he helped Dean lie back down. Dean’s eyelids felt heavy again.

“What is even wrong with me?” He asked weakly.

“You must've caught something. It’s truly a miracle that I didn’t, considering all the kisses we exchanged,” he said, brushing loose strands away from Dean’s forehead. “You were unusually tired yesterday, I guess now we know why,” he added. “I can still call Benjamin, you know?”

“Nope,” Dean grunted, closing his eyes.

He could hear Cas’s snort. “As you wish. But if you won’t feel better by the morning, we’re going to the doctor."

Dean whined in response, causing Cas to chuckle again.

“You should sleep some more. I’ll be here if you need me,” Cas said softly after a beat. 

Dean couldn’t recall ever feeling so miserable and unwell, to the extent that he required assistance just to simply drink. There had been one time when he had been little and his parents had had to take him to the hospital because his temperature had not subsided for several hours, but that had been basically it. He couldn’t have been more than seven years old at the time. Even John Winchester had looked seriously worried, clutching Sammy’s tiny hand in his. This was probably the only time Dean had seen his father showing so much vulnerability. 

He remembered his mother's gentle touch on his cheeks, her fingers soothing his sweaty hair.

And now, Cas was taking care of him in a very similar manner. His very personal Angel.

Dean’s Angel had a nice ring to it, he had to admit. 

He must’ve dozed off again, because the next time Dean opened his eyes, it was already dark outside and the soft glow of the bedside lamp bathed the space in a warm light. Dean looked around and noticed that his puke had been cleaned up. Castiel was sitting on the bed beside him with some papers scattered on the comforter. He was wearing one of Dean’s Zepp’s T-shirts. It had been a little baggy on Dean, but it seemed to fit Cas perfectly.

“What are you doing?” Dean asked, getting Cas’s attention. 

Castiel smiled, putting the papers away. “Translation. How are you feeling, Dean?” He asked, propping his head on his elbow. 

“Dirty and tired, but definitely better,” he responded. He still felt weak, and his limbs were heavy, but he was determined to take a shower and brush his teeth, at least. “I’ve gotta use the bathroom,” he said, then started to get up, but soon discovered that he was quite dizzy. The room spun dangerously around him, causing Dean to shut his eyes and grip the headboard for support.

“Wait, I’ll help you,” Cas stated, standing up and circling the bed.

“I’m gonna be fine,” Dean growled, frustrated. 

Castiel leveled him with his glare. “Stop it, Dean. Let me,” he said, putting his hand around Dean’s arms and lifting him up. Dean was too weak to shoo him away.

“But you’re gonna leave when I pee,” he grumbled. He had some dignity left, dammit.

"I am. But I will be back to help you shower. I suspect you wanted to try and do it by yourself," Cas retorted, amusement dancing in his eyes.

"But I have to undress," Dean said with a frown.

"Yes, Dean, you can’t shower in your clothes," Cas replied, raising his eyebrow. "We've seen each other naked before, and I'm not leaving you so you could break your head on the tiles."

Dean whined but eventually decided to let it go. There was no point in fighting over it. Cas was as stubborn as they come, and Dean's legs wobbled beneath him, threatening to give way at any moment.

As promised, Cas joined him right after Dean had dealt with his bladder and washed his teeth. He stripped Dean slowly from the sweaty T-shirt and underwear - Dean just let him, too tired and weak to freak out about it.

Then, Cas took off his clothes as well. Well, that caught Dean's eye for sure.

He had seen Castiel naked before, but Dean had been so nervous at the time, under the shower in Kiel, that he could barely remember any details. He had also seen Cas shirtless during those past few days, however his jumpy feelings hadn’t really allowed him to properly appreciate the sharp contours of Cas’s incredible body. 

This time, Dean let his gaze wander over the expanse of tanned skin. He had never been so interested in collarbones in his whole life, he decided, slowly leading his eyes from Cas’s neckline through his chest, then down to his abdomen. Castiel’s muscles were firm, meticulously honed over countless hours spent in the gym. He looked almost as if someone had carved him from stone and his naked body was a work of art, radiating otherworldly beauty. As Dean's eyes traveled even further south, he noticed Cas’s well-defined hip bones, creating an absolutely sinful, distinct V-line, leading Dean’s hungry gaze right down to Cas’s big-

“Dean?”

“Yeah?” He said weakly, his eyes snapping back up to Cas’s amused face.

“Can you step into the shower?”

Oh, so that’s what they were doing here. He was supposed to take a shower. He was gross and smelly.

Dean nodded, banishing naughty thoughts from his mind, then turned around, Cas following right behind him. Luckily, Dean’s shower was quite big, so they could both easily fit there. Standing appeared to be a little tricky, so when Dean turned the water on, he leaned his back and head on the tiles behind him, trembling slightly from the effort of keeping himself upright. Cas stepped a little closer and reached for a shampoo, pouring it on his hands, then gently stroked Dean’s head, spreading the liquid on his hair. The sensation of a warm spray of water mingling with Cas’s hands steadily massaging Dean’s scalp felt absolutely blissful. 

When Castiel was satisfied with the amount of foam on Dean’s head, he reached for another product, spreading it thoroughly over Dean’s torso.

“Can you lean on me?” He asked quietly. Once Dean nodded, Cas pulled him closer to his chest and started slowly washing Dean’s back and neck. When Cas’s hands slid down to his ass, Dean groaned and shivered under the gentle touch.

“It’s not how I imagined us naked, under the shower,” he muttered, slurring slightly.

Cas hummed, then stopped his movements and hugged Dean tightly. “I know,” he murmured softly. “We’ve got time, Dean. For now, let me just take care of you.”

They stood there, under the spray of warm water, for the next few minutes, until Cas slightly pulled away and proceeded to wash Dean’s legs. When all was clean except for Dean’s junk, Cas looked up at him with a questioning look. 

The sight would be incredibly hot if Dean didn’t feel like a wet noodle.

“I got it,” he said, then stuck out his hand for Cas to pour body lotion on it. He was a little aroused from all the touching and nakedness that was going on, but there was no point in getting full horny now - which would definitely happen if Castiel tried to actually wash his dick.

With Cas’s assistance, Dean stepped out of the shower perfectly clean a few minutes later. Cas helped him dry and put on some clean underwear, then supported him on their way back to bed.

Lying under the covers again, Dean let out a long sigh. Being ill sure was exhausting.

“Do you want to try eating something? I could make you a porridge,” Castiel said softly, sitting on the verge of the mattress beside Dean.

“Cas, you should go back to Jack, he hates staying alone with Gabe,” Dean muttered.

“Jack knows you are not well, and Gabriel promised to behave like an actual adult this time. They’re going to be fine for a day or two. Now tell me, are you hungry?”

Dean observed Cas’s stubborn expression for a moment, then finally nodded. “I could try eat something."

Once Cas left the room, Dean covered his eyes with his arm, wondering how surreal it was that his absolutely perfect boyfriend, that also happened to be an America's Cup champion, had cleaned his vomit from the floor, had almost carried his sorry ass to the shower, and was preparing him a freakin’ porridge in his kitchen.

+

The next two days brought completely normal, albeit very irritating symptoms of a cold. Dean no longer had a fever, and the nausea seemed to be completely gone, but he started coughing and had the most troublesome condition of a runny nose known to humankind. He kept sneezing, snorting, and whining, but Cas took it like a champ and refused to leave Dean's side, except for going to the office for exactly two hours on Monday. He and Charlie managed to establish a way for him to work remotely from home, allowing Cas to constantly supply Dean with food, water, and hot tea.

“I can't smell anything and food tastes like sawdust,” Dean muttered on Tuesday evening when they were lying in bed side by side, Cas working on his laptop. “I can't smell your stormy scent. It's driving me nuts,” Dean added quietly, rubbing his eyes.

Cas glanced at Dean with a small smile, then grasped his hand and ran a thumb across his knuckles. “I smell like a storm to you?” He asked softly.

“Yeah. And a little bit like an ocean. I really like it,” Dean responded.

Cas’s smile widened slightly. “I really like your scent, too. It calms me down.”

Dean frowned. “You're always calm, dude.”

“I am certainly not,” Cas chuckled, then let go of Dean’s hand and squinted back at the screen.

“What are you doing?” Dean asked Castiel after a beat. He felt a little bored after three days of doing nothing - he had tried to read and watch stuff on Netflix, but it had kept getting him drowsy and he hadn’t been able to focus on the plot at all.

“Translation,” Cas responded without turning his gaze from his laptop.

“What are you translating?”

“It’s a legal, Swedish text. I’m translating it to English.”

Dean stretched out his neck a little and yep, he could now see some actual words written down in the open document in a language he couldn’t understand. “Is it urgent?” He asked, glancing at Cas.

Castiel looked briefly at Dean, raising his eyebrow, then back at the text before him. “Why do you ask?”

“No reason.”

“Very unlikely,” Cas murmured with a small smile, then looked back at Dean. “I can do it later. Do you want some tea?”

“Nah,” Dean responded. “Still have some left. Hey, how to say ‘my starry sky’ in Swedish?”

Cas smiled a little wider. “Min stjärnhimmel.”

Dean hummed, rolling the unfamiliar phrase around his tongue. Swedish sure sounded complicated. “You could teach me a few words in Swedish,” he finally said.

“I still have to teach you Portuguese, Dean.”

Oh, right. Dean had already requested some language lessons from Cas.

“Yeah, that too. But I'd like to know how to greet your family when I get to meet them,” Dean said, and as soon as the words left his mouth, he felt a fear spreading in his guts. Did he say too much? They were together only for a few days, maybe Castiel didn't even want to introduce Dean to his family. Dean had been dating Lisa much longer and he hadn't once thought about meeting her parents, for heaven's sake.

Cas hummed, observing Dean's face. “They all speak English, so there is no need for you to greet them in Swedish,” he said, then closed his laptop and put it on the bedside table. “But I could teach you regardless,” he added, looking back at Dean with a soft smile. It seemed that Dean’s words didn’t faze Castiel in the slightest. “I was thinking we could start with Portuguese after me and Jack come back from Sweden,” Cas added, propping his head on his elbow.

Dean knew Castiel had decided to visit Jimmy for a few days, and even though Dean felt pretty bummed that he wouldn’t see him and Jack for a few days, he decided he wasn’t going to be petty about it. Castiel had literally moved to Porto and Dean saw him practically every day now. Cas’s family - not so much.

“Man, I hope I'll actually learn something this time,” Dean chuckled.

“What went wrong the last time you had your lessons?” Cas asked.

Yeah, Dean didn't think this through. “Well…” he started, looking at the ceiling. “I had a problem with focus,” he finally said, aiming for casual.

Cas narrowed his eyes slightly. “You banged your teacher, didn't you?”

Dean winced. “Yeah. She was hot,” he admitted weakly.

Cas grinned. “Just so you know, our lessons won't be jeopardized if you sleep with the teacher this time.”

Dean grinned back at him. “That's actually great because I have a hunch it might end exactly that way. It's entirely possible I've just got hots for teachers,” Dean responded, then wiggled his eyebrows.

“That’s interesting,” Cas murmured, leaning a little closer.

“No, don’t, I’m covered in snot,” Dean chuckled, trying to move away.

“I don’t care,” Cas retorted, pulling Dean into a tight hug.

“I’m literally like a snail right now, dude.”

“Very handsome one, let me add.”

+

On Wednesday morning, Dean finally felt almost like a human again, so he obviously wanted to go to the hangar right away. However, Sam and Cas convinced him to stay at home and rest for at least another day. Dean decided to use the extra time to clean the apartment, including changing the bedding and doing the laundry.

God knew it needed to be done at this point.

Castiel returned home to Jack that day as well - their trip to Sweden was just around the corner, so it was about time to pack anyway. Fortunately, neither of them seemed to catch the same illness as Dean, in the end. 

When Dean showed up at the hangar early on Thursday, he was greeted by terrible chaos and an overwhelming amount of work, forcing him to stay there after hours. Since Cas was also dealing with an excessive workload and was planning to hit the gym later, they decided to postpone seeing each other until Friday. 

At noon that day, Dean entered the office and stopped in front of the security desk, spotting Jody with a girl he hadn’t seen here before.

“Hiya, Jodes,” he greeted her with a bright smile. “Long time no see.”

“Hey, Dean! I heard you were not feeling very well. Are you alright?” Jody asked, returning the smile.

Dean chuckled. “Yeah, I’m okay, but it was awful. I don't remember being this ill.”

“It's so good that Castiel was there, with you,” Jody said. “He’s really sweet, you know?”

Dean nodded, mumbling completely unrecognizable sounds under his breath while fighting with a blush. Finally, he cleared his throat, then glanced at the new girl sitting at the desk.

“Oh, right. This is Kaia, my other daughter,” Jody introduced her. “She wanted to see what working as a security guard looks like, so Donna and I figured it’s worth a shot.”

“Hey, Kaia,” Dean said, shaking the girl’s hand. “I’m Dean. It’s nice to have you on board.” The girl nodded politely. She looked like a really shy kid, so he decided not to crowd her. “And how is Alex doing?”

Jody smiled. “She's alright. I think she finally found what she was looking for. She decided she wanted to stay at the hospital.”

“Good for her,” Dean responded with a smile of his own. “Okay, I’m gonna go. I need to make sure Cas won’t actually starve,” he added, pointing in the direction of the elevator with his thumb. “Have a nice shift, ladies.”

“Sure thing. Have a nice day,” Jody retorted at the same time as Kaia quietly said “Thanks.” Dean smiled once again and finally turned around, leaving them to their duties.

When he got out of the elevator on Cas’s floor, Dean walked straight to his boyfriend's office. He had prepared a very fancy, vegan sushi and was actually curious if Castiel would like it.

He knocked three times, then let himself in without waiting for a response. He was greeted with Cas’s bare back and his tattoo on full display. Dean’s eyes bulged out of his head and he almost dropped the bag with sushi on the floor. Cas turned around with a frown, but when he saw that it was Dean who entered the room, he smiled.

“What are you doing?” Dean asked with a frown, closing the door behind him. 

“I spilled coffee on my shirt and had to change to a clean one,” Cas responded calmly, slipping a blue, button-up shirt over his shoulders. "I knocked the mug over on my desk. You were right; I can’t see very well without glasses," he added, fastening the buttons.

“Here, let me help,” Dean said, then put the bag with food on the coffee table and circled the desk.

“Thank you,” Cas sighed, rubbing his eyes with his hands.

“You alright?” Dean asked, tearing his gaze away from buttoning up the shirt.

“My muscles are sore and I’m hungry” Cas replied, pulling Dean by his waist and resting his forehead on Dean’s shoulder with a contented sigh. “Did you bring food in this bag?” He asked, his voice hopeful.

“Yeah, Cas,” Dean responded with a chuckle. He buttoned the shirt all the way up, then put his hand on Cas’s unruly hair and started to stroke it affectionately.

They stayed like that for a moment, until Cas raised his head, looking at Dean with a small smile. “I've missed you,” he murmured.

Dean felt his heart melt. He smiled back, then put his hand on Cas's chin and planted a gentle kiss on his plush lips.

“I've missed you too, sweetheart.”

“I really like when you call me that,” Cas admitted quietly, then leaned in, bringing their lips together again. The world slowly fell away and Dean dissolved into the softness of Cas’s mouth. He instinctively moved to touch Cas's cheek, his thumb caressing the stubble along Cas’s sharp jawline. When he felt Cas’s hot tongue on his lower lip, Dean gasped, then cupped Cas’s face and slowly pulled himself away, ignoring the plaintive noises Castiel started to make.

“Cas, the last time we did this, we ended up very frustrated against my wall. We can’t do it again. This time, we're gonna wait for the results and then have sex, like normal people,” Dean said, then put a small peck on Castiel’s lips to make his pout disappear. “C’mon, let’s eat,” he said, pulling Cas in the direction of the sofa. “How’s your day going?”

“Busy, but not bad. I had a meeting with your brother. I really admire his approach to problem-solving,” Cas said, sitting down.

Dean nodded. “Yeah, Sammy’s pretty smart. But don’t tell him I said that.”

Cas smirked. “Of course. How is your day going so far, Dean?”

Dean plunged his hand into the bag, withdrawing two plastic containers. “We installed an engine on our 60-foot girl. She’s gonna be so fine when I finish with her,” he said, handing one container to Cas. “There you go. The ones with avocado and cucumber are my personal favorites, but I’d like to hear your opinion. Chopsticks and soy sauce are inside.”

As Cas opened the lid, his eyes went wide. “It looks incredible, Dean,” he said, admiring the sushi rolls from all sides. “Is it the Philadelphia Cream Cheese?” he asked, poking at the contents of his box.

“Yeah, I made a plant-based one,” Dean said, dipping a piece of his sushi in soy sauce. “It was actually pretty fun to make.”

“This is so good,” Cas said when he managed to swallow the first bite, immediately diving for another piece.

Dean felt a stupid smile forming on his face. “Glad you like it,” he said, observing Cas devouring his sushi. “I’m really happy that you’re here, y’know?” He said after a beat, not even sure what had possessed him to say something so sappy.

Cas raised his gaze. He looked surprised at first, but soon his lips curled upwards in a warm smile that reached his eyes. “I’m very happy to be here,” he rumbled. 

Dean nodded, pushing the rolls in his container around. “Yeah, that’s… that’s good,” he said. “You changed so much lately that it would be pretty awful if you were regretting your decision to live here,” he added quietly.

Cas’s face turned worried. “I am not regretting anything, Dean. Why would you even think that?”

“I just want to uh… make sure, I guess,” Dean admitted weakly. “I mean, you’ve gotta know that since you’re here, my work is so much easier. I’m seriously in your debt, but uh…” he cleared his throat. “I’m just lucky you wanted to be with me, too.”

“Dean…” Cas said gently, putting his container away and reaching for Dean’s hand. “I thought we already cleared this up, but I'll repeat it as much as you need to hear it. You are an exquisite human being. Only a fool wouldn't want to be your partner. I am the lucky one here,” he murmured.

Dean's cheeks turned red. Damn that man and his ability to make Dean instantly blush. He averted his eyes from Cas's intense gaze, trying to regain his composure. “Yeah, okay. I'm not gonna argue with you about me, this is pointless and you’re too stubborn,” he finally said.

“Such a smart man,” Cas said with a grin, then pulled Dean’s hand and closed the space separating them once more.

This time, when Cas put his tongue forward, Dean didn’t stop him, meeting him in the middle instead.

And even if ten minutes later they ended up quite frustrated on Cas's sofa, Dean decided it was totally worth it.

+

“Oh, man! How did you even do it, kid?” Charlie whined, waving her hand at the table before them. Jack blinked at her, then squinted his eyes and glanced at his dad, who shrugged. Dean tried to contain a snort, but he only partly succeeded.

Charlie narrowed her eyes at him. “You knew he was a genius, didn’t you?”

“Hey, don’t put the blame on me. The kid is just better than you, that's all,” Dean retorted, then winked at Jack when Charlie turned her angry face to Cas. Jack smirked.

“And you! You let him win!” Charlie exclaimed with a frown.

“I did no such thing,” Cas said innocently, tilting his head.

“Ugh… You’re the worst!”

“You’re a sore loser, babe,” Dorothy muttered from the sofa behind them. “Did you actually lose for the first time in your life?”

Charlie huffed, crossing her arms on her chest. “Of course not,” she said, blushing a little.

They were playing a fun, tile-based game called 'Carcassonne.' The goal was to construct roads, fields, and cities using tiles drawn from a shared pile. Jack approached the game very strategically, quickly taking the lead, much to Charlie's surprise. In the end, she couldn't keep up with the kid. Dean suspected it might be, in fact, her first loss in this particular board game. He chuckled, then turned his head to Cas, who was already observing him with a soft smile and gleaming eyes. He had another, denim shirt on and was showing his sinful collarbone again. Dean very much wanted to lick it.

They both knew they were only a few days away from having it all, and the sheer knowledge sent shivers down Dean’s spine. The slowly swirling ocean in Cas’s eyes was warm and inviting, making Dean's insides gooey.

“O-kay!” Charlie’s voice broke the silence. She fixed her gaze on Dean. “I think we need more snacks before another round. Will you help me?” She asked, pulling Dean up by his arm from the chair he was sitting on. Then, she led him towards the kitchen without waiting for his response.

As soon as the door shut behind them, she turned her wide smile at him.

"You’re so gone , dude," she whispered excitedly. Dean rolled his eyes at her but couldn’t contain the smile forming on his lips. He had texted her a while ago about them being together, so she wouldn’t whine that he had kept such an important detail of his personal life to himself. Dean knew there was no point in keeping anything from her - she had been so invested in everything that was going on between Cas and him, that she would find out about everything anyway, one way or another. Besides, Dean really needed his friend in all the mess going on inside of his head.

"I know," he finally muttered.

"Damn, you don’t even bother denying it," she murmured. “Have you had sex already?” She asked, raising her eyebrow.

Dean ran his hand across his face. “Not yet, but yeah, we’re getting there. We both had our blood drawn for the STIs today,” he admitted, looking at the door. “I don't want to jinx things, but It's going really well, Charles.”

Charlie's eyes brimmed with fondness. “You’re already so sweet I can barely handle it, Winchester,” she said then squeezed his cheek affectionately.

Dean batted her hand, slightly frustrated. “Alright, that’s enough,” he grumbled.

Charlie giggled, then stepped a little closer and put her arm around him. “I’m so happy for you, Dean,” she said quietly. “I never would’ve thought you’d score yourself a Swedish, blue-eyed Viking.”

Dean snorted, shaking his head, but hugged Charlie back.

“Hey, we could totally dress him as a Viking for a convention,” she said after a beat, pulling herself away from Dean. She looked excited again.

“Uh…” Dean started, images of Castiel in Viking clothes rapidly flooding his mind. He cleared his throat. “Yeah, I mean, why not?” He finally said. “We’ve gotta prepare an Aragorn costume for Jack, anyway. We could do both.”

“We should start when they come back from Sweden,” Charlie said, moving to her kitchen cupboards. “And we’re going to make you one, too. You’re not getting out of this, Dean,” she added, leveling him with her look. “Can you make some tea in a pot?” She asked.

Dean sighed, then nodded and approached the kettle. After a moment, he glanced at her again, summoning the courage to bring up the subject that had been weighing on his mind. "I'm kinda worried that I'm not exactly cut out for romance, y’know?" He muttered.

Charlie glanced his way with a frown. “What do you mean?”

“We uh… just keep doing all this domestic stuff. None of my previous relationships looked like that,” Dean admitted. “Cas says it doesn’t bother him, but there is nothing exciting about cutting onions and peppers every other day. I mean, don’t get me wrong I absolutely love it and I feel great when we’re all together. I’d actually love nothing more than to live with them again. I’m just afraid it all lacks uh… I don’t know… excitement? What if Cas gets bored with me?”

Charlie observed him for a moment with wide eyes. “Shit, I have to actually start saving money for your wedding present,” she muttered. Dean made a face at her, making her snort. “Dean, seriously, he looks like he wants nothing more than to carry you to the nearest bed, bridal style. He is as gone as you are! Trust your instincts a bit,” she said, proceeding to fill the bowl with chips. “Besides, you can always just take him on a romantic date and see how you two like it,” she said, taking a bowl in her hand. “Oh, that actually reminds me, we’re going clubbing next week with you two lovebirds.”

Dean sighed. A part of him really didn’t want to go to a club again, the birthday fiasco still fresh in his memory. On the other hand, Dean was pretty sure that seeing Cas dancing would absolutely push his brain into overdrive.

“Yeah, okay, but only if Cas wants to actually go there,” he finally said, then took a pot with tea in his hand and went back to the living room, following Charlie.

“Alright, we’re playing again, but this time, you can’t talk in Swedish in the middle of the game! That’s cheating,” Charlie said while sitting back by the table.

+

“You had vegan sushi without me? I want one, too,” Jack declared, clearly scandalized. Dean glanced at the kid from the front seat of Lincoln, trying to contain his wide smile.

“I’ll make you one when you guys get back to Porto, I promise. Deal?” Dean offered.

Jack seemed to consider the olive branch for a moment, then finally nodded. “Okay. But I’ll hold you to your promise.”

“And I expect nothing less from you, Jackie,” Dean chuckled, then turned his gaze to Cas, sitting in his driver's seat.

Cas had such nice hands, and long fingers, for that matter, currently tightened on the steering wheel. It was truly a crime that Dean hadn’t made him drive to Sintra. He knew how Cas looked when he drove Baby, there was no way in hell he wouldn’t look as good while driving a car. But Dean was just this stupid sometimes, and let excellent opportunities slip away. 

“We should be back by Wednesday,” Cas suddenly said, interrupting Dean’s ogling session.

“Okay, I’m gonna get you from the airport, just give me a heads up,” Dean responded. They had earlier agreed to spend the night at Cas's place so Dean could drive them both to the airport in the morning.

“Thank you,” Cas murmured with a soft smile. “I’m a little worried about seeing my brother again. I hope we won’t end up fighting,” he added, a frown forming on his face.

“Hey, you can always come back home earlier, y’know?” Dean said. “Or I’ll just come to the rescue. You only need to call me.”

Cas shot him an amused glance. “You’d actually fly to Sweden alone, just because I told you my brother is annoying?”

“You know I would, don’t act so surprised,” Dean grumbled, looking out the window. “I didn’t say I’d enjoy the metal cage of death, but I’d do it,” he muttered under his breath. “So, uh, are we gonna actually go to this club Charlie won’t shut up about?” He asked a little louder.

“She seemed very excited,” Cas said, then added, “and she was right, we actually didn’t manage to dance together on my birthday. I’d like to change that.”

Dean looked back at Cas with a mischievous grin. “Would you, now?”

“You know I would, don’t act so surprised,” Cas retorted, raising his eyebrow.

They suddenly heard a groan from the backseat. "Am I going to end up with Gabriel again?" Jack whined, making both Cas and Dean snort.

When Dean managed to contain his amusement, he turned his head to the kid again. “Don’t worry, bud. If you’re not comfortable with the idea, we don’t have to go. Or you could have a sleepover at Sam’s and Eileen’s if you’d like.”

“Sam and Eileen’s!” Jack exclaimed, pumping his fist into the air. Cas glanced at the boy in the rearview mirror, then back at Dean, a look of admiration on his face.

Yeah, Dean was so generous, letting Sammy finally be useful.

Once Cas parked his car behind the Mustang, they all got out and walked to Cas’s apartment, Dean and Cas hand in hand. When Cas disappeared in his living room, Dean stopped Jack in the hallway.

"Hey, Jackie, can you send me the pictures of us from Sintra?" he asked. "I could totally use a new wallpaper for my phone."

Jack directed a frown at him, but pulled out his phone and started searching for the photos. "You’re old," he muttered under his breath.

"What? No, I’m not," Dean argued. "Why would you say that?" He asked with a scowl. He wasn’t old, dammit. He was in his prime, or something.

"Nevermind. Here, I sent it.” Jack said. When he looked back up, Dean could see his hesitant expression.

“Uh-oh. What is it?”

The boy sighed, then looked around, and finally back at Dean, a frown deepening on his face. “You know we're going to Visby too, right?”

Dean nodded.

“Just so you know, Benjamin called Castiel yesterday. I think he wants to see Dad. I could hear him raising his voice through the speaker,” Jack said in a hushed tone.

Dean felt his pulse speeding up. “You uh… don't like the guy or something?” He slowly asked.

Jack huffed, then shook his head. “He was always treating me like a baby and never took me seriously,” the boy stated, rolling his eyes. “But that's not the point. I know he likes Dad, so he must be jealous of you. I really don’t want him around.”

Dean had to fight really hard with his face to suppress a smirk. Okay, so maybe Jack's words lifted his spirits a little, sue him. He cleared his throat, ultimately deciding to act like a grown-up.

“Don't worry, Jackie. They are still friends, y'know? They probably just want to talk,” he said, sending the boy a reassuring smile, also intending to reassure himself a little.

Jack didn't look very convinced, but after a beat, he nodded. “Okay,” he said quietly. “I’m gonna take a shower now," he added and walked to his room after Dean ruffled his hair.

So, the douchebag clearly didn't give up on Cas, but if Dean was honest with himself, it wasn't very surprising. Besides, even though their meeting was making Dean slightly nervous, Cas had said he had ended things with the pretty doctor, and Dean had no reason to doubt him.

He shook his head, then pulled his phone out, opening the last received message. In an instant, any troubling thoughts vanished from Dean’s head, a big smile involuntarily forming on his lips. The photo from the Castle of the Moors was quickly filling his heart with a disturbing amount of fluff. All three of them were happy and smiling, under the beautiful, clear sky with a Muffin Palace visible in the distance. Dean didn’t even know he could smile so wide.

He had a sudden urge to inform absolutely everyone around him about his happiness. He sighed, then after a moment’s thought, sent the picture forward to the family group chat. When Dean's mind wandered however to the thoughts of publishing the picture on his social media accounts, he felt a slightly unpleasant shiver running down his spine. 

Even if he had started his journey of stepping out of the closet, he sure as hell wasn't completely out yet. He still struggled with holding Cas's hand in public, goddamnit.

He could bet that Benjamin wouldn't have any problems with holding Cas's hand in public.

Probably neither would Ishim.

Dean thought back to when he had told Bella about going on a date with Cas, all the nervousness he had felt.

Then he remembered the soft smile he’d gotten from Castiel in return.

He glanced back at the photo on his screen. It wasn't like they even looked like a couple here, they were just standing beside each other in a place with a nice background, dammit. 

He knew Cas didn't expect him to push his boundaries, but Dean was pretty sure this was a boundary he very much wanted to push himself. And it was just one, stupid photo. It shouldn't even be such a big deal for him.

Dean sighed again. He still had to ask Cas before he did anything - the guy had been trying to stay private for many years, and even if that wasn’t the case anymore, showing his kid’s face on the Internet did not sound like the smartest thing, as far as Dean understood how the Internet worked.

He swiped the screen, opening the next photos that Jack had sent him. There were a few random flowers and landscapes, one of a very tired-looking, sweaty Dean on their way back to the Impala from the hilltop fortress, which made Dean giggle. There was also one photo of him and Cas squinting at the Triton (when had Jack taken it, Dean had no clue), and a few of excited Jack and Cas exploring the spooky Initiation Wells and caves. Finally, Dean opened the last three that had been taken during their trip to see the sunset, and his eyes instantly widened.

The one with him and Cas smiling at the camera was going into the frame and on his bedside table, Dean decided. The sun softly illuminated their faces, bathing them in the golden glow. Their cheeks were pressed closely together, and Cas’s eyes were crinkling in the very same way Dean had seen back at the Wadden Sea. His boyfriend was so stupidly hot that it wasn’t even funny anymore.

The next photo made Dean's insides a little gooey. He was suddenly extremely grateful that Jackie had been so smart and had taken the damn photo, just so Dean would remember exactly the great experience of ‘Kissing Cas in Front of the Setting Sun’. It was very intimate, and with both their eyes closed and lips pressed tightly together, they seemed completely oblivious to the world surrounding them. The extent of their obliviousness became very evident in the last photo, which was basically a selfie of Jack smiling widely with his fingers formed into a peace sign, while Cas and Dean were still kissing in the distance. 

When Dean finally raised his gaze from the screen, he directed his steps into the living room, where Cas was sitting comfortably on his couch, two glasses of whisky on the coffee table in front of him.

“Jack just told me that I’m old,” Dean muttered, taking a seat beside his boyfriend, and putting his legs up on Cas’s lap.

“Don’t worry, you’re not. He is at such an age that every person over twenty is old for him,” Cas responded calmly, handing Dean one glass.

“Thanks, sweetheart,” said Dean. “Does he say this shit to you, too?”

“All the time,” Cas chuckled. “He’s starting to have this attitude and I’m starting to slightly panic. He's morphing into a teenager disturbingly fast. One moment he's asking for bedtime stories, the next he's insisting he's not a kid anymore and doesn't want to be treated like one. It’s quite baffling.”

Dean nodded, then passed Castiel his phone, where the last photo was still open. “Yeah, I see what you mean, man. Have you seen this?”

Cas took the device from Dean’s hand and squinted, then snorted when he realized exactly what he was looking at. “I have not,” he chuckled. “I think it's safe to say he’s comfortable with our closeness,” Cas remarked before swiping back to the previous pictures. “Oh…” he said, bringing the screen even closer to his face. “This one’s intense,” he murmured, glancing at Dean with a gleam in his eyes. Dean took a sip from his glass, feeling his mouth rapidly drying under the heat of Cas's gaze.

“So, I was wondering, would you mind if I published the one from the Castle of the Moors on my social media? You know, the one where we're all together?” Dean asked, trying to nonchalantly swirl the whisky in his glass and almost pouring the damn thing on Cas's floor.

Cas raised his eyebrow, then once again focused his attention on the screen. “I really like it,” he murmured with a soft smile, placing the phone on the coffee table. “Are you sure you want to do it, though?” he asked, glancing at Dean.

Dean wouldn't be himself if he didn't try to instantly deflect all the seriousness coming his way. “Why? You ashamed of me or something, Cas?” he said with a stupid grin.

Castiel remained unfazed. “Yes. That's exactly why I constantly remind you how pretty you are,” he retorted smoothly.

“Yeah, I walked right into that one,” Dean muttered, then took a sip from his glass. “I mean, it's not even really showing anything, we're just standing there. Honestly, I'm more concerned about publishing Jack's face on the internet than anything else,” he added.

Cas hummed, narrowing his eyes at Dean. “Don’t worry about Jack,” he said, then tilted his head slightly. “I know you know that, but I'll say it anyway. If you do it, people will start asking questions. It's very possible you'll upset some of them, even. I don't want you to deal with things you're not ready for, Dean.”

Despite knowing quite well that Cas was only trying to protect him, Dean felt a pang of irritation coursing through his body.

“Okay, I know I'm kinda new in all this, and that I specifically asked for your patience,” Dean began quietly. “But I need to take a step forward, man. It's just one photo of us, and hopefully, there will be more in the future. I have to start somewhere, Cas, and I refuse to pretend that we’re not together,” he added firmly, turning his stubborn gaze back to Castiel. 

Yeah, Dean hadn’t landed the hottest guy out there just to pretend they were nothing more than friends for the rest of their lives. He understood there was a long way ahead of him, and that he needed to overcome his fears and nervousness first, but he believed that with time, he’d gain enough courage to stand proudly by his decisions, regardless of who might be watching.

Castiel’s lips parted. He scanned Dean's face intensely for a few seconds before he softly breathed out Dean’s name.

“How is it that you say all those impossible things all the time?” He asked, letting his gaze drop to Dean’s smiling lips.

I love you, Dean thought. That’s how. He didn’t say it out loud, though. He just waited patiently for Cas to put his glass at the coffee table, lean closer, and squeeze between his thighs, so they could finally make out and Dean could melt under Castiel’s perfect touch again.

Just before their lips brushed together, out of the corner of his eye, Dean spotted a crouched figure creeping slowly into the room. He frowned, then looked to his right, causing Cas to follow his suit.

“Gabriel, what exactly are you doing?” Castiel asked, confused, hovering over Dean.

“Oh, sorry, fellas. I’m pretty sure I left my headphones here. Don’t mind me,” Gabe said, then straightened up and started rummaging through the sideboard standing nearby.

Cas looked like he wanted to say something, but finally decided against it. He shot Dean an apologetic look and retreated with a deep sigh to his place on the couch, taking his glass of whisky into his hand.

“Do you want to watch a movie with me?” He asked Dean after a moment of hopelessly observing how his brother scattered papers, books, and other crap all over the floor.

“Yeah. What are we watching?” Dean asked, putting his legs back on Cas’s lap.

“I wanted to see ‘Bridget Jones's Baby’.”

Dean winced. “It’s a chick flick movie, man.”

Cas shrugged. “I don’t care. Does it really bother you so much?” He asked, sipping his whisky.

“I mean, it’s… like… emotional?” Dean said weakly. “I don’t know, it’s just… it’s emotionally draining to watch, is all.”

Cas hummed, narrowing his eyes. “That’s interesting,” he finally said. “But I like it. We watched a few movies you proposed, it’s only fair we watch something I pick, for once.”

"Oh, I’d like to see it, too,” Gabe suddenly said, then walked to the couch and sat at Cas’s other side, completely forgetting about his frantic search for the headphones.

Dean sighed inwardly, recognizing his own defeat. Fighting one Novak was hard, but arguing with two had to be absolutely futile.

“Alright,” he finally muttered, downing his whisky.

Once Cas started the movie and wanted to sit on the couch, Dean pulled him between his legs, positioning Cas's back against his chest. If he was really gonna do it, he’d better have an armful of Castiel in front of him.

50 minutes into the movie, Dean found himself immensely invested in the plot. The main character was apparently torn between an American and a British guy, and also pregnant with an adorable baby bean, with no way to tell which of them is a father.

“She should go with the mathematician,” Gabe muttered with a frown.

Dean sent him a surprised look. “What do you mean, man? She's clearly not over the lawyer.”

Gabe shook his head. “Nah. They weren’t happy before, they won’t be happy now. I’ve been there. You don't step into the same river twice,” he stated, glancing at Dean over Cas’s head.

“Can you please stop talking?” Cas said from Dean’s chest, amused.

Dean rolled his eyes, but quickly forgot about Gabe’s stupid ideas, drawn back into the story.

What a poor guy, Dean thought twenty minutes later, when Bridget finally told Mark that she didn’t know if it was his baby. God, Dean would be completely devastated if it happened to him. Not that it would bother him that the baby wasn’t his - he was sure he would love it anyway, just like Bobby loved him and Sam. 

Just like he was undoubtedly starting to love Jack. 

For Dean, the worst part would be simply not knowing if the person he wanted to be with, wanted him back. He wouldn’t stand so much unresolved tension and longing.

By the time Bridget was giving birth, Dean was a nervous wreck curled up on the couch, clutching a cushion to his chest. Castiel had declared some time earlier that he’d had enough of Dean’s jumping at every new piece of information shown on the screen, so the three of them were now sitting beside each other. Cas kept sending him amused glances, but Dean was too invested in the movie to give a crap.

Once they heard Ellie Goulding’s pop hit in the background and the credits finally started rolling, Dean was emotionally devastated. He could have sworn he had aged at least 5 years from all the stress he had experienced. He put a cushion on his face and groaned loudly.

“Now we know the real reason Dean-o doesn’t watch chick flick movies!” Gabe chuckled.

“Shut up, dude. It’s fucking exhausting! Shouldn’t a movie relax you or something? I’m literally tired right now,” Dean whined.

“But they ended up happy, Dean. Why are you so angry?” Cas asked, raising his eyebrow.

“Yeah, but at what cost, man? They were miserable for almost two hours!” Dean retorted, waving his hand at the screen.

Gabriel grinned, glancing at Cas. “We should totally watch ‘Pride & Prejudice’ next.”

“The hell we are, I ain’t doing it again!” Dean growled at Cas’s brother. “Why can’t we watch ‘Indiana Jones’, or… or ‘Once Upon a Time in the West’?”

Gabriel made a contemplative expression. “I wouldn’t say no to Harrison Ford.”

“Well, duh, who would?” Dean said with a suggestive grin, but quickly schooled his face when he met Cas’s narrowed gaze.

Cas observed him for a moment, then glanced at his brother, raising his eyebrow. “Don’t rile him up, Gabriel. I'm worried he won't be able to fall asleep. He’s very sensitive,” he said with a sly smirk.

“Cas, I swear to God, you’re gonna drive your ass to the airport tomorrow yourself,” Dean retorted while Gabe tried to contain his giggles.

+

Dean was in the middle of cleaning the Baby’s deck - scrubbing brush in his hand and foam all around him - when he felt his phone vibrating in his back pocket. His knees protested as he straightened himself, supporting his weight on the mast. A quick glance at the screen revealed it was a video call from Jack.

“Hiya, bud!” Dean greeted the kid even before he saw his dark blond hair and excited expression. Next to the boy’s head appeared a girl with heavy makeup and a frown. She seemed a bit older than Jack. Behind them, Dean could see a wall full of posters of a band he didn't recognize.

“Hi, Dean!” Jack exclaimed, waving to the phone. “I wanted you to meet Claire,” he said, looking at the girl beside him, who rolled her impossibly blue eyes in a very Cas-manner.

Dean chuckled. “Hello, kid,” Dean greeted her, wondering if Castiel knew that they were calling him.

“I’m not a kid,” the girl said, her frown deepening. “And I thought you’re going to be younger,” she added, narrowing her eyes at Dean.

“I am young!” Dean retorted with a scowl.

“Sure you are,” she said, raising her eyebrow.

“Claire,” Jack hissed to her, then glanced back at the screen. “Sorry. She’s sometimes angry for no reason at all.”

Dean couldn’t help but snort. “It’s cool, I feel like that sometimes, too,” he chuckled. “So, what have you been up to?”

“We’re at Uncle Jimmy’s,” Jack explained. “Claire was curious about how you look.”

The girl’s eyes widened, and she gasped, her expression shifting from surprise to horror in an instant. She turned to Jack and started talking very fast in Swedish, gesticulating vividly. Jack looked surprised, then responded in Swedish as well. Dean observed them for a moment, amused, but when Jack started to look uncomfortable, he decided to interfere.

“Alright, enough,” he said, slightly raising his voice so he would be heard by the kids. “I wanted to meet you too, Claire. Jack and Cas told me a lot about you,” he said, getting the girl's attention.

“Oh,” she muttered weakly, then briefly glanced at Jack before turning back to Dean.“Well, uh… hi, I guess,” she said with a shy smile.

“Are you on Baby?” Jack asked, bringing his face a little closer to his screen.

“Yeah. I decided to clean her today, since you guys are not here, y’know?” Dean said, then realized he sounded a little pathetic. It had only been a day since they left to Sweden, and Dean was already feeling lonely. He cleared his throat awkwardly.

“Baby? Is that your boat?” Claire asked curiously.

“The one and only,” Dean confirmed. “Wait, let me show her to you.”

Dean switched the camera to the front and moved around the deck, telling Claire about the Impala. Then, he walked inside, describing the basics of the boat’s construction. When he finished, he came to the cockpit and sat behind his steering wheel.

“Looks really cool,” Claire concluded with a nod of approval.

“Right? When you visit us, Dean could take you sailing on her,” Jack added with gleaming eyes.

“Sure thing,” Dean said. “Are you planning to visit Porto?” he asked the girl.

“Yeah, maybe. Castiel invited us all.”

“Great. We could totally take Baby on a swing then,” Dean said, then glanced at Jack. “What were you guys doing today?”

“Nothing much. We went for a walk around the city, and Claire took me for a pizza,” Jack responded.

“Ugh, there is literally nothing to do here,” Claire grumbled beside him. “I envy you for moving to Porto, dude.”

Dean understood the girl's frustration. Cas’s twin and his family lived in a quite small city not far from Stockholm, and there was no way the place provided much entertainment for the rapidly growing teenagers.

“I really like Portugal. It’s warm and sunny, and Dad’s around now, which is awesome,” the boy admitted. “And Dean makes a mean lasagna.”

Dean smiled at his phone. “Damn right I do, kid.”

“Wow. You've got them wrapped around your finger with vegan lasagna. Well done, old man,” Claire concluded, glancing at Dean.

“Wait till you try it too, Miley Cyrus,” Dean responded, cocking his eyebrow at the girl, who rolled her eyes. “You good, Jackie?” He asked as he shifted his gaze back to the boy.

“Yeah.”

“And how's your Dad doing?”

“Uh…”

Dean frowned. “That doesn't sound so good.”

“I mean, he's not bad,” Jack said, glancing at Claire.

“He and Dad, they're talking. Like a lot. About their past,” the girl supplied.

“But they're not arguing. It's more like Uncle Jimmy wants him to meet with the rest of the family. I guess Dad is just tired.”

Dean sighed. Castiel had texted him during the last day, and even though he hadn't mentioned any family problems, Dean could tell something was off with the guy.

“Okay. Thanks for telling me this, guys. Do you think I could talk to him now?”

“Sure. Dad’s downstairs,” the boy said, then let Dean say goodbye to Claire before he stood up and left the room with his phone. Dean could see the ceiling moving around as Jack made his way through Jimmy’s apartment.

“Are you excited to see your grandparents, bud?” Dean asked after a beat.

“Yes, but it's going to be strange to visit Visby after we moved out.”

“I know what you mean. I have the same problem when I visit Bobby in Newport,” Dean admitted. “You could always see your friends, y'know?”

“Yeah, Dad said the same thing. I actually want to meet with my old classmates on Tuesday,” Jack said, looking away from the phone to watch his steps. Soon, Dean could hear Cas's rumble in the distance, mixed with two other voices.

“Dad!” Jack said. The voices went silent. “I'm talking with Dean; he wants to say ‘hi’,” the boy added. The ceiling moved again as Jack passed the phone, finally revealing Cas's ruffled hair and surprised look.

“Dean!” He said, smiling at the screen. Dean felt his own smile tugging on his lips in response.

"Hey, handsome," he said, observing as Cas took him in. When Castiel's gaze dropped to his shirt, Dean noticed a slight widening of his eyes.

“Why are you wet?” Castiel asked, raising his eyebrow.

Dean looked at his chest, then back at his phone. “The kids called me in the middle of cleaning Baby,” he explained.

“Is that his boat?” Someone off-screen, who Dean couldn't see, asked. 

Cas raised his head with a frown, as if he suddenly remembered he wasn't alone in the room. “Yes, it's the Impala I told you about,” he responded, then glanced back at Dean and moved his hand, revealing his brother and a woman Dean didn't know, sitting on the couch. “I’m sure you remember Jimmy, and this is his wife, Amelia,” Cas's voice explained. Dean waved to the phone.

“Hi, Dean,” Jimmy said with a polite smile, while Amelia waved back.

Cas moved the camera back at himself. He looked a little tense around his eyes. “So, the kids called you?”

“Yeah, Jackie wanted me to meet Claire.”

“Oh boy, they shouldn't disturb you like that, I'm so sorry,” Amelia said.

“Nah, Jack can call me anytime, he knows that. And Claire seemed nice. She told me you are planning to visit Porto. You're all welcome on Baby's deck, by the way,” Dean responded.

“You are very kind,” Jimmy said, his head appearing next to Cas's on the screen. It was still incredibly weird for Dean to see the two of them sitting beside each other.

“You're Cas's family, you're always welcome, man,” Dean said, observing the almost identical faces. It was like the weirdest game of ‘spot the difference’ he had ever participated in.

Jimmy grinned, then briefly glanced at his brother before his eyes landed back on Dean. “Thank you. I’d gladly talk with you properly, this time. Our last meeting wasn't exactly ideal,” he said. Dean started to wonder if the guy meant the dick behavior he had presented towards Castiel and Jack, or maybe Dean’s minute of utter horror that he had spent panicking about Jimmy's love confession to his wife.

“Sure wasn't. We should definitely grab that lunch,” Dean responded with a strained smile. “Listen, I should probably finish here while the sun's still up,” he added after a beat. “It’s really nice to see you all, but I don’t want to interrupt your family time.”

“That’s very considerate of you,” Jimmy said.

“Thank you, Dean. I'll call you in the evening,” Castiel added, his face lighting up with his sweet, little smile that reached his eyes.

“Sure thing. ‘Till later,” Dean said, then added a little louder, “Bye, guys,” waving at Jimmy, before he disconnected the call.

+

By the time his phone rang later that evening, Dean was nearly asleep, the book he had been reading propped up on the pillow next to him. He reached to his bedside table, almost knocking down a glass of water that he had put there before lying down.

He just tried to be a responsible adult who stayed hydrated. It had absolutely nothing to do with the fact that Jack had scared him that without drinking enough water during the day, Dean would age faster.

The screen illuminated Cas’s name, so Dean answered the call with a grin. “I thought you forgot about me,” he quipped, raising his eyebrow.

“I did. I actually butt-dialed you. This is incredibly awkward,” Cas retorted without missing a beat.

“Damn. We should just hang up, I guess.”

“I think you might be right,” Cas murmured. Dean heard a smile in his voice.

“Hiya, Cas,” Dean finally said, smiling stupidly.

Cas hummed. “Hello, Dean.”

“How are you feeling?” Dean asked, putting the book away.

“It’s definitely not the worst visit I’ve participated in. My brother seemed to adopt a new approach, and he currently demonstrates an understanding of my choices. It’s truly terrifying,” Cas stated, making Dean snort. “Also, I have the impression I am raising a sneaky, little traitor. My son reports everything to you before I even have time to think about it. Could you enlighten me how this happened?”

“I have absolutely no idea what you are talking about.”

“Yes, I suspected you would say that,” Cas murmured. “You two have some kind of secret agreement that I don't know of, but my common sense tells me not to get involved.”

“Yeah, you'd better listen to it, man.”

Cas chuckled softly. Dean was sure his face lit up with a sweet smile.

“Why am I not seeing you, Cas?” Dean asked after a beat.

“I have an impression that we already had this conversation, but you are very handsome, so I'll just pretend it never happened. I'm currently not there with you, because we're in Sweden, Dean,” Cas chirped.

“And to think you’ve got the audacity to say that Jack is sassy, man” Dean chuckled. “Why didn't you video call me?”

“My battery is low. I'm afraid it won't survive it.”

“Ah, the saga of Castiel and his uncharged phone continues.”

“I can still just hang up on you, you know?”

"Yeah, but you wouldn't do it," Dean responded with a grin. "So, how are things with your brother?"

He could hear Cas sigh on the other end of the call. "He seemed to finally understand why I decided to move. He saw that Jack was happy, and I stopped looking tired all the time, so I guess it slowly dawns on him that it might've been a good idea from the start."

“This is great, right?”

Castiel hummed again. “Yes, but Jimmy wouldn't be himself if he didn't try to complicate things. He thinks I'd be willing to reconcile with my father now, and I am not interested in talking with Chuck. He is one stubborn, selfish bastard.”

“Wow,” Dean muttered. “I have a feeling he wasn't the Father of the Year.”

Cas stayed silent for a moment before he spoke again. “He was anything but,” he admitted quietly. “He was very unpredictable and cold. I actually think he didn’t hug me once in his whole life.”

“Oh shit,” Dean breathed, his heart sinking a little. “Wait, what do you mean he was unpredictable?” He asked, dreading the answer. 

Cas hummed quietly. “He wasn’t aggressive,” he began, “he was just not… fully present. But the times he was, I wished he weren’t,” he rumbled. “There was this one time when I was still a kid. I was a little older than Jack, I think; I had just upgraded to Lasers. I had this friend, his name was Zeke and we were in the same sailing club in Sweden. Zeke had a really nice smile,” Cas said softly. “I think he was my first crush, but I didn’t realize it back then. I remember I was very excited about training, to the point I delayed returning home every evening,” he chuckled. “One day, my father decided to see how I sailed. It was very unusual for him to take interest in what my siblings or I did, but that day he came to the club. When we finished the training, I and the other kids started to hide the sailing equipment in the hangar. I'm not sure what I did that tipped him off, perhaps I looked at Zeke differently than at the rest of my friends, but my father must have seen something he didn't like. He looked at me strangely, then informed me he would wait for me in the car, completely devoid of any emotion. He didn’t say a word to me the whole way back home. Then, he sat me down on the couch in the living room and told me he was disappointed in my behavior. He didn’t say anything else, I had to guess why he was acting like that. Since I couldn’t come up with anything, he brought me the Bible and tossed it onto the table, ordering me to find a proper answer inside. He also forbade me to go back to the quay for the next month. I tried to reason with him, but he refused to speak with me and finally closed himself in his office. He pretended I didn’t exist for the next few weeks. He loved the silent treatment,” Cas said bitterly.

“What the actual fuck,” Dean muttered.

“He did that every time he was displeased with our behavior. When my mother got sick a few years later, he declared it was because his family turned away from God. He actually accused us all of not praying enough - especially me and Gabriel, since we were queer.”

Dean felt a wave of sadness washed over him. “Your mom got sick?”

“Yes, she died of cancer before Jack was born,” Cas said quietly.

“Fuck, I’m so sorry.”

“It was a long time ago, but thank you,” Cas murmured. “Obviously, my father was the one who suffered the most. He was behaving like a true martyr, a sad widower. He acted as if our mother was the love of his life, even though he treated her as coldly as he treated his own children. Well, maybe except for Luke. I guess he loved him, in his own, twisted way, allowing my vicious brother to do whatever he wanted.”

“That’s really fucked up,” Dean muttered. “And uh... what happened with Zeke?”

“Well, soon after that, I was enrolled in a structured training program. It started to get pretty serious at this point, so sadly, no time for crushes,” Cas said, amused.

“Poor Zeke, he doesn't know what he's missed,” Dean responded. “It’s such a fucking shame I didn't know you back then.”

“Christ, you had to be so pretty, with those huge, green eyes and cute freckles,” Castiel murmured.

“You sayin’ I’m not pretty anymore, Cas?” Dean asked teasingly.

“You are stunning,” Castiel remarked without missing a beat. Dean thanked the heavens it was just a phone call.

“Yeah, okay,” he said, then cleared his throat. “Even if we knew each other back then, I doubt I’d have the guts to hit on you, and that is if I even realized I was into guys,” Dean finally said. “John would be so pissed, man,” he added, shaking his head. 

“I can sense your father was a true piece of work,” Cas said after a beat. ”Your childhood must’ve been incredibly hard.”

"Yeah, well, it seems you didn't have it any better, sweetheart," Dean retorted, observing his ceiling. He didn’t like to talk about John, he never had, but he started to suspect that talking about it with Cas wouldn’t be so painful. In fact, it could even be a source of release, of some sort.

Dean cleared his throat. 

Perhaps he’d find the courage to talk about it, someday. It was definitely not this day, though.

“I could technically still kick Chuck’s ass, just so you know,” Dean said quietly some time later, making Cas chuckle.

“Thank you, Dean. This is very romantic.”

“Don’t mention it,” Dean retorted with a grin. “So, when are you visiting Visby?”

“Tomorrow,” Cas said slowly. “But I guess what you’re really asking is when am I going to meet with Benjamin.”

“Awww, you’re meeting the douchebag doctor?”

“Don’t act so surprised. I bet Jack told you about that, as well,” Cas said, amused. Dean could swear he could hear him raising his eyebrow.

“What if he did? You didn’t want me to know, Angel?”

“Of course I didn’t want you to know, Dean. You’re overanalyzing absolutely everything and you’d jump to stupid conclusions right away. I wanted to tell you that when I came back, preferably in bed, with my dick buried deep inside you. That way I could assure you where exactly my interests are, and you wouldn't even be able to escape,” Cas said smugly. “Are you blushing yet?”

“Nope,” said Dean, definitely blushing. “So uh… What does he want?”

Cas sighed. “He wants to know what changed my mind about relationships.”

“And what are you gonna tell him?”

“Nothing he doesn’t already know,” Cas murmured. “What do you think, Dean?”

Dean grinned. “It was because of my mean lasagna, wasn’t it?”

He could hear Cas’s deep laugh on the other side of the call. “Yes, that is correct. It was the lasagna all along.”

“Good. You’re gonna get one when you come back,” Dean said. 

Come back home, to me, he thought.

“We’ll be back soon,” Cas said quietly after a beat.

“You’d better be.”

Chapter Text

“Why on earth did you do that?!”

Dean froze with the sandwich halfway to his mouth, looking at pissed Crowley, stomping through his hangar. Seeing Crowley's anger, the other employees quickly moved away, leaving Dean alone at the Brit’s mercy.

“Are you out of your mind, Squirrel? Couldn’t you just fuck him, like a normal person?! There is no need to get mushy on the Internet!”

Dean took a bite of his food, observing as the heavy-breathing Crowley stopped right in front of him. The Brit looked very funny when he was angry, with beads of sweat on his forehead and a crazy look in his eyes.

“I didn’t fuck him,” Dean retorted, chewing his sandwich. It was quite tasty, with a bean paste Dean had done himself this morning.

“Excuse me?” Crowley asked, narrowing his eyes.

“I said that I didn’t fuck him. Not that it’s any of your business, but I didn’t.” Yet. “And what’s the big deal here, anyway? We’re just standing there, man,” Dean said calmly.

Yeah, he had put the photo of the three of them on his social media this morning. He’d decided he would just do it, and he sure as hell didn’t care what Crowley thought about it.

What would he do, fire Dean?

“You think you’re so funny?” Crowley asked in a dangerous voice.

“I am quite funny, yeah,” Dean retorted with a grin.

Crowley rolled his eyes. “Why am I working with imbeciles?” He muttered under his breath. “I'll say it once, so try to focus for a moment. It’s not that I condemn your choices here; I would even go as far as to say ‘Good for you’. But for crying out loud, the things you do have an impact on your company! We’re not living in a friendly world full of open-minded people, Winchester. You have to realize that you sell boats mainly for rich, closeted old men, who want to pretend that gay people don't even exist!”

Dean pursed his lips, then slowly nodded. “Yeah, I know.” Crowley frowned at him. Dean held his gaze. “I know that, I'm not stupid. I also know they wanna fuck a different girl or guy every night, forgetting about their wives and kids waiting for them at home. I’m sailing long enough to know that, Crowley,” Dean retorted. A sandwich in his hands started getting disturbingly soggy, so he placed it back in the plastic container. “I’m not saying that I wanna make big changes in the sailing community, because I really don't. But if publishing a photo with my boyfriend on it is really such a big deal for some people, I'd rather not sell them my boats at all,” he said evenly.

Crowley's frown slowly transformed into a small smirk. “Boyfriend?” He asked, stressing each syllable. “This is serious for you,” he added quietly. Dean didn't react. “You stupid lad. Romance is for children, Squirrel, not for Castiel Novak,” Crowley continued quietly. “All the years we were working together I've never seen him swooning over anyone, not even the pretty skipper of the New Zealand team. Granted, Castiel has a kid now, and he looks interested in your fine piece of ass, but believe me when I say, people don't change so much. This is not a fucking fairy tale, and he's not your prince charming!”

Dean smirked. “Alright. Now, if that’s all you wanted to say, let me finish my sandwich in peace. I have to get back to work soon. Someone's gotta build those little boats, so we can sell them to some decent people, this time.”

Crowley’s gaze turned dangerous. “You’re going to regret that, Dean. You are trying to tame a wild horse and put a nice saddle on it, but you will fail. You’d better start praying that when all of this is over, there still will be a company left for you to run,” he snarled, then turned around and walked away.

Dean observed him disappear behind the massive hangar door, then finally let out a breath he didn't even realize he was holding and reached for his sandwich. He knew he shouldn't let Crowley get into his head, but it wasn't easy, being as insecure as Dean Winchester. Even though, Cas had been doing probably everything he could to reassure Dean that he really, really wanted to be in a relationship with him, so Dean had just decided to trust the guy. He had cleaned Dean's puke from the floor , for fuck’s sake.

Dean sighed, then finished his meal and pulled out his phone. Cas had sent him three red heart emojis and a smiley face this morning, the dork.

Then, he had sent a photo of a smiling Jack and an irritated Claire, standing in front of the airport. 

The last message had been sent fifteen minutes ago:

1:21 PM, Cas - “We’ve just landed in Visby. I miss you 😘.”

Dean grinned at his screen, then started typing his response.

1:37 PM, Dean - “Miss you too. Crowley’s super pissed at the photo.”

1:37 PM, Cas - “Good.”

Dean snorted. Leave it to Castiel to lift his spirits in no time.

1:38 PM, Cas - “I’ve noticed some nice comments under our photo.”

1:38 PM, Dean - “Nice comments? Charlie and Sam lost their shit, man.”

1:39 PM, Cas - “Yes, it seems they are very happy for us. It’s quite endearing.”

1:39 PM, Dean - “To the point of being creepy.”

1:40 PM, Cas - “You’re exaggerating.”  

1:41 PM, Cas - “How are you feeling?”

1:41 PM, Dean - “Y’know, the earth keeps spinning and all .”

The truth was, Dean felt nervous about it, especially since Charlie and his stupid brother had seemed to start a contest for the biggest Cas and Dean fan in the comments. On the other hand, sharing the photo with the world happened to also be quite freeing - Dean felt almost as if he had suddenly lifted some kind of invisible weight off himself. 

The sound of an incoming message brought his attention back to the screen.

1:42 PM, Cas - “You're constantly surprising me with your bravery, Dean.”

Dean was nowhere near brave, but there was no point in fighting over that with Cas, so he changed the subject.

1:42 PM, Dean - “You’re gonna meet with stupid Benjamin today?”

1:43 PM, Cas - “I am, but I promise there is no need for you to worry about it.”

1:43 PM, Dean - “You know I’m gonna do it anyway.”

1:43 PM, Dean - “Just so you know, if he’ll try to kiss you, I’m gonna punch him.”

1:43 PM, Cas - “My hero.”

1:44 PM, Cas - “Please, don't feel obligated to punch people on my behalf.”

1:44 PM, Cas - “I can do it myself.”

1:45 PM, Dean - “Let me feel I'm needed, Cas. My ego will suffer otherwise.”

1:45 PM, Cas - “Of course 😉. My apologies.”

+

The voices in the room were just background noise at this point. Dean had no idea why Sammy had insisted on his participation in a stupid meeting, but Dean’s brother had seemed completely certain it had been necessary. Apparently, Sam had needed a backup, and Cas hadn't been back yet, so Dean or Benny had had to step up.

Benny had very rudely decided to get ill that day. Dean wanted to strangle him.

Bored to death and almost asleep on his uncomfortable chair, Dean suddenly felt his phone vibrating in his pocket. It was a text from Cas:

11:36 AM, Cas - “I've just got an email, I'm clean.”

Dean felt his pulse rising. He straightened up in his seat and opened his email app. 

He had no new messages.

Strange , he thought. If Cas had gotten an email, Dean should get his in a moment, too. He put the phone back into his pocket and looked out of the window. The weather was still very nice, perhaps they could have a lazy Saturday sailing on Baby? They could even go for a whole night trip.

Unless Dean was infected and Cas would finally dump his ass. 

No, Cas wouldn't do such a thing. He would insist on a treatment, refusing to leave Dean. He would become incredibly unhappy, lonely, and sexually frustrated over time. Dean would have to make him leave. No way he'd let Cas suffer while he tried to get rid of a fucking chlamydia.

But that was only Dean’s luck. When he had finally found someone he really wanted to be with, he would have to let him go.

Dean's phone vibrated again, making him jump on his chair.

It was a message from his brother. Dean frowned, then opened the text.

11:42 AM, Sammy - “Can you at least pretend you're listening??”

Dean looked up at Sam, who sat at the other side of the conference room with a fully formed bitch face. Dean looked back at his screen and started typing.

11:43 AM, Dean - “Can you finally cut your stupid hair?”

He sent it, then glanced back up, waiting for Sam's reaction. It did not disappoint. Satisfied, Dean put his phone away with a sigh. The meeting seemed to be about promoting the company on the Internet, therefore not Dean’s area of expertise in the slightest. He glanced over the shoulder of a guy sitting beside him at the documents lying on the table. He saw numbers neatly put on the tables - amounts of money spent on advertising. He frowned. Was it really so expensive?

Suddenly, he felt a nudge on his arm from Charlie, sitting at his other side.

“Have you seen the new photos?” She asked quietly. 

Dean shook his head. “What photos?” He asked, but Charlie only nodded toward Kevin, who was currently speaking. Dean turned his attention to the kid as well.

“...it is crucial for conducting stable and effective advertising. We’re currently introducing logos to new material, taking advantage of Mr. Novak’s involvement,” he said, then looked at the projector screen behind him, where a huge photo of Cas and Dean leaning on the mast appeared.

Dean felt his hands sweating rapidly. 

It looked like a fucking wedding photo shoot, with Dean’s lovesick gaze and flushed face mixed with Cas’s gentle smile and soft eyes.

He looked around, meeting his brother's stupid grin and Charlie’s excited expression.

"Noooo," Dean said, shaking his head, as he managed to raise his jaw from the floor. “No no no. That's not happening, guys,” he added with a frown, looking back at the screen. “Crowley almost rip my head off yesterday for putting a harmless, family picture on the internet and you wanna, like, promote the whole fucking company with this ? Are you insane ?!”

Charlie babbled something nervously, shooting Sam an unsure look.

“I mean, it’s only an idea, Dean. We obviously wanted to consult it with you,” Sam supplied with an awkward smile.

“Yeah, we can totally go with a different one,” Charlie added, nodding.

Dean frowned. “C'mon, It's way too lovey-dovey for an ad! We look like a missing couple from ‘Love Actually’!” Dean exclaimed, waving his hand in the air.

“How do you know this movie, Dean?” Sam asked, his eyes widening.

“This is so not the point, dude,” Dean retorted, pissed at his brother. “You’ve gotta pick something else,” he added, glancing at Charlie. 

“Alright, stop panicking. We just wanted to show you what we came up with,” Charlie reasoned. “Seriously, we’ve got so many of those, that we can choose something you feel comfortable with.”

“The photos will be sent to your email accounts for verification,” Kevin interjected, sending Dean a nervous glance.

“Oh I’m sure gonna verify them, alright,” Dean grumbled.

“Right, well, Kevin, let’s wrap it up,” Sam said to the kid with an encouraging smile. 

“I uh… Am I fired?” Kevin asked, glancing at Charlie.

“Nobody’s fired, Kev,” Charlie responded before turning her gaze to Dean. “Chill out, dude,” she whispered when Kevin resumed his presentation. “Just check out the rest of them and tell us what you think,” she added, then focused back at the screen.

+

Three hours later, Dean was trying to reach the coolant hose in the engine of their 60-foot sloop. He still hadn't received the stupid message from the stupid clinic, but at least he could finally return to the hangar and immerse himself in the kind of work he actually enjoyed - getting his hands dirty. Conducting checks and tests to ensure everything would work properly was one of his favorite tasks, so he let his mind rest, performing well-known movements with his fingers.

When he felt his phone vibrating in his pocket, he crawled out from under the engine and retrieved the device. An unknown number was calling him this time.

He felt his jaw muscles tightening. It's gotta be fucking chlamydia, he thought, right before he answered.

“Dean Winchester?” A rough, accented voice asked. 

“Yeah?” Dean replied, pressing the phone to his ear with his shoulder while he quickly wiped his hands on a towel.

“This is the harbormaster of Marina da Afurada. I'm afraid I've got some bad news for you,” the man said.

All of Dean's blood instantly left his face, and his heart started beating rapidly. “What happened?” He rasped, standing up and taking his phone in hand.

“Your sailboat…” Dean heard the rustle of papers. “...The Impala, was damaged. There is a breach in the laminate on the starboard.”

“A… a breach,” Dean repeated weakly. “Is the water getting inside?”

“No, it is about twenty centimeters above the waterline.”

Dean sighed, closing his eyes and arming himself for a serious heartbreak. “How big is this breach?” 

“Fifty centimeters, maybe less.”

“You've gotta be kidding me,” Dean muttered, opening his eyes. “How the hell did someone put that big of a hole in my Baby?” He whined.

“The other skipper lost control over his vessel. He came to us right after the accident, he’s quite shaken up. I have the whole footage from our security camera saved for you,” the other man said. “I am very sorry. I'm sure the boat repair service will fix it for you in no time.”

Dean chuckled weakly. “Yeah, except that I am the boat repair service,” he muttered. “Listen, I need about forty minutes to get there. Tell this skipper to wait for me. We need to talk,” Dean said, already walking to the boat’s ladder.

+

“This is a fucking nightmare,” Dean muttered to himself, running his hand over the ridiculously wide hole gaping in the black hull. He straightened himself up, then glanced at the very young man shaking at the quay. He couldn’t be older than 20, Dean thought.

“I am so sorry, Mr. Winchester! I'll cover all the losses,” the guy - Alfie - pleaded miserably. He had refused to go away, following Dean right to the Impala and repeating over and over again how sorry he was. Dean really wanted to get rid of him, but the kid seemed to be in some kind of shock, observing Dean’s movements with wide eyes and a pale face. Dean sighed, then looked back at the breach. The harbormaster hadn't been kidding, Alfie had mercilessly smashed his stern into Baby's hull at full speed. Dean had whimpered a little when he had seen the footage a few minutes earlier. 

“This is truly a disaster, and my first time as a skipper, such a failure,” Alfie started talking to himself.

“Okay, enough,” Dean said steadily, glancing at the young guy, who immediately shut up. “How did it even happen, Alfie? I mean, it’s pretty hard to miss the whole boat standing at the quay.”

“No, I saw the boat, sir. I just confused the gears. I am so very sorry-”

“Alfie, stop. Just…” Dean said, running his hand over his face. “Look, I need a moment alone with my boat. I’ll give you a call, alright? There is no point for you to just stand here, man. Go home and drink some tea or something.”

Alfie nodded weakly, then sniffled, turned around, and finally dragged himself to the parking lot. Dean observed him for a moment, then sighed, pulled the phone out of his pocket, and took a photo, sending it to Bobby and Cas. The hole was enormous. He wanted to cry.

Castiel needed exactly ten seconds to call him.

“Are you alright?” Was the first thing he asked. 

“I'm really not,” Dean whined.

“Are you hurt? What happened?” 

Dean frowned. “Dude, why are you asking about me? Have you seen Baby? She is the one hurt here!” 

Cas didn't respond right away, and when he spoke again, he sounded like he was trying to be very careful with his words. “Of course. Can you please tell me how it happened?”

“A very young skipper put his stern right into Baby's starboard,” Dean said, tearing his gaze away from the breach. “I have no fucking clue how he managed to do this. He told me he confused the gears. How do you confuse gears like this, Cas?”

“Are you going to murder me if I say that accidents happen?”

“Yes.”

“Alright. I have no clue either, then,” Castiel responded. “Is it deep?”

“Yeah,” Dean admitted, sitting heavily in his cockpit. “I have to patch her up. It's gonna take ages for a hole this big. This day just keeps getting worse and worse. And I thought nothing would top the fucking chlamydia,” he added, leaning his forehead on his hand.

“You've got… chlamydia?” Castiel asked cautiously.

“I don't fucking know. I guess I do, 'cause I don't have my results yet, and you've already got yours!” Dean whined. 

He heard Cas sighing on the other end of the call. “Dean, do you experience a burning sensation in your penis when you urinate?”

“What? No!”

“Any bleeding? Swelling of testicles, perhaps?”

“Oh my God…”

“So, that would be a no, then. Very good. Now that we established it is most likely not chlamydia, would you do something for me?”

“What?” Dean snapped.

“Could you please leave the breach alone for now and just go home?”

“No! How am I supposed to just leave my girl like that, Cas?” Dean asked, offended. “It would be like blasphemy!”

Cas sighed again. “Dean, I'm worried about you,” he said slowly. “You are very stressed and I'm sadly not there to help you. I would like you to take care of yourself, at least.”

“I’m not gonna be able to relax now, anyway! What difference does it make, man?”

Castiel stayed quiet for a few long seconds before he spoke again. “Do you remember that one time, a few months ago, when you called me, panicked, because you were worried about me? My crew was sick for a few days and I had to sail almost by myself.”

“I wouldn't say I panicked-” Dean started, but Castiel interrupted him before he could finish.

“Do you remember what you said to me back then?”

Dean did remember. He had been pissed at Cas that he hadn't understood why Dean had been worried about him in the first place.

“...Yeah,” Dean said, fully aware that Cas was using his own words against him. “But it’s not the same, dude. I’m not in any danger here, I’m just… miserable.”

“Yes, so was I, Dean. It didn’t stop you from worrying for me, did it?”

Shit.

“Do you see my point now?” Cas asked gently. “Dean?” He added when Dean failed to respond for the next few moments.

“Yeah, okay,” Dean finally sighed out. 

“Thank you,” Cas said. He sounded relieved. “Can you call me when you get home?” He asked, because of course he wanted to make sure Dean would actually go home now.

Dean took one last glance at the damage to Baby's hull, then took a big breath and nodded. “I just need to close her up and I’ll be on my way,” he said defeated, wondering how it was even possible that he ended up doing exactly what Cas wanted him to do.

+

“How deep is it?” Bobby asked as soon as Dean called him back.

“Deep. I have to replace the whole planks,” Dean responded, leaning on his kitchen cabinet. 

“You remember it’s mahogany, right?”

“Bobby, I could list you all her parts in my sleep. Of course, I remember. I should still have some wood in the hangar.”

“Okay, mister know-it-all. Just remember to sand her properly so that the patch doesn't fall out,” Bobby grumbled.

God, Dean was being a dick again. 

“Sorry. It's been a really long fucking day,” he said, then opened the fridge, looking for some beer. “I'm gonna start repairing her tomorrow. I still don't know what to do with the kid who did this. He looked terrified.”

“I bet he did. He owes you a lot of money now, Dean.”

“Yeah, I don't know. He's just so young, and I'm literally building boats for life. All it's gonna cost me is my internal pain and some time, you know that,” Dean said, then took a sip from the bottle.

Bobby confirmed with a hum. “You don't have to decide right away. Maybe see how the repair goes first,” he said then hesitated before he spoke again. “Did you talk with yer boy about Thanksgiving already?”

“Not yet. It didn't come up,” Dean replied. “You thought about the turkey, Bobby?”

“Uh-huh. Ellen and Jo said they wanna try making it all vegetarian and vegan, so no dead birds, this time,” Bobby said gruffly.

“Damn, you sound excited,” Dean retorted. “You sure you don't wanna withdraw the invitation?”

“Yeah, I'm sure. Don't make me regret it with yer smarmy attitude, boy.”

When they finally exchanged their goodbyes a few minutes later, Dean finished his beer and headed to his bedroom, tapping twice on Cas’s name on his phone screen. 

Castiel answered the call almost immediately. “How are you feeling?” He rumbled through the speaker.

“Like shit,” Dean admitted, sitting on his bed. “This day was awful, man. One thing happened right after another,” he added with a sigh. “Sam made me attend another business meeting. Why do we even need so many of those, Cas? It’s fucking ridiculous. And did you know that he and Charlie wanted to put on our company’s promotional material this completely insane photo of us?” He grumbled, annoyed.

“I did not know that,” Cas slowly replied, “but I’ve seen the results of the photoshoot. Which picture did they choose?“

“The one that is definitely not intended to be on any kind of official crap. Not to mention Crowley would probably kill me for all the evil, gay propaganda,” Dean muttered, running a hand across his face.

He could hear Castiel shuffling at the other end of the line, followed by the distinct sound of a door shutting somewhere near the speaker. “I’m so sorry, Dean. It's incredibly unfortunate that I'm not there with you when you’re frustrated. And I think I'll have to have a talk with Crowley,” Cas said, his voice laced with anger towards the end. 

Dean would definitely want to see this happening.

“You go, babe, destroy him,” he chuckled.

Cas hummed. “At least you're smiling again,” he said softly after a beat.

Dean's expression faltered for a moment, caught slightly off guard. He cleared his throat. “Yeah,” he said weakly. “And how, uh… how did the meeting with the douchebag go?”

“Well… It could be worse,” Cas started carefully. “He wasn't happy, but you won't have to punch him, at least,” he added with a hint of amusement in his voice.

“Damn, I was actually looking forward to it,” Dean muttered, making Cas chuckle. “God, I just wanna forget about this stupid day,” he added, making himself comfortable on his bed.

Cas seemed to hesitate before he spoke again. “Perhaps… I could make it up to you, somehow?” He asked in his very smooth voice.

Dean felt a tingling sensation passing over his skin. “Are you saying what I think you’re saying, Cas?” He asked carefully.

Cas paused for a moment. “I... might be,” he finally replied. “Where are you now?”

Dean felt his cheeks slightly reddening. “On my bed. What about you?” He asked, playing with the hem of his T-shirt. It had been ages since he'd engaged in phone sex, he thought, trying to calm himself down a bit. He wouldn’t last very long if he got too excited too early.

“In a room in this rather large house,” Cas replied steadily. Dean’s heartbeat quickened. Before he could formulate anything sexy to say, however, Cas spoke again.

“Last night I couldn't sleep, so I watched a documentary about the Great Barrier Reef.”

Dean blinked. “Great Barrier Reef,” he repeated dumbly.

“Yes. Did you know it started dying because of the amount of CO2 that we put into the air? The corals are losing their colors.”

“Uhh…” Dean mumbled, feeling perplexed by Cas's sudden shift in topic. Was it some kind of kinky code he didn't get? “I didn’t… I didn’t know that, no,” he said with a frown.

“It’s because of the decreasing pH of the ocean, which is actually becoming more acidic over time.”

Dean really wanted to respond with something, anything, but his head was completely empty, so he stayed silent. Castiel, however, appeared unconcerned that he was the one doing all the talking here.

“This can lead to the extinction of entire species. It’s exceptionally sad, really,” Cas continued after a beat. “I had a friend once, who kept arguing with me about the process of global warming. It was quite a while ago, but even then there was no mistake that it was progressing.”

Dean had absolutely no clue how they’d gotten there, but it seemed that Cas was quite passionate about the condition of the oceans. And it was totally fine to be passionate about that, but the sudden shift in conversation left Dean feeling a bit of whiplash. He shifted on the bed. “I mean, isn’t it, like, scientifically proven?” He asked, trying to find his footing.

“You’re completely right, it is,” Cas rplied. He started sounding suspiciously entertained.

“Oh my God,” Dean muttered. “You’re doing it on purpose, you asshole!” He exclaimed, trying to contain a grin forming on his lips. 

He could hear Cas snort, followed by a deep laugh coming from the other side of the line. "You were ready to just sit there quietly, listening to a whole speech about marine biology, weren’t you, Dean?”

“Fuck you, Cas, seriously,” Dean said through laughter. “My dick is so confused right now, you have no idea.”

“I’m sorry, I couldn’t help myself,” Cas replied, his voice punctuated by chuckles. “I just wanted to take your mind off things.”

“Yeah, well, you nailed it,” Dean retorted. “Fucking Great Barrier Reef, man,” he chuckled, shaking his head in disbelief. “But you know what? This whole sex phone thing might’ve not been the best idea today. I’m super distracted and I feel kinda weird. Not to mention my chlamydia,” he added, just to be annoying.

“You don’t have chlamydia, Dean.”

“I still could have something else, though.”

“Well, did you call the clinic?” Cas asked.

“Nah, if the results are bad, I don’t even wanna know.”

“You’re ridiculous,” Castiel murmured. “There may be plenty of reasons why you didn’t get your email, yet you somehow assumed the worst possible option,” he added. “You do realize that even if you were infected, we'll handle it together, right?”

“I had a feeling you’d say something like that,” Dean replied as his cheeks started getting hot.

“And I had a suspicion you’d get some remarkably stupid ideas,” Castiel cheerfully commented. “I’m very happy we cleared this up. So, what are we doing tomorrow, boyfriend?”

“I mean, I’d love to do something romantic, for once, but I should probably start patching Baby up. My heart bleeds when I know she’s injured, man,” Dean replied with a sigh.

“Of course. I’ll go with you, then. You could teach me how to do it. I only ever used fiberglass and epoxy resin, and I’m almost sure Baby’s hull is at least partly wooden.”

“Yeah, you guessed right,” Dean replied. “You sure wanna go on another useless date with me, this time including inhaling toxic fumes?” He asked with a self-deprecating chuckle, but Cas clearly didn't want to hear any of it.

“I want to go with you, I’m serious, Dean. Why are you so mean to yourself all the time?”

"That's just how my brain works, I guess.”

Cas sighed softly. “Alright. We’ve got some earlier flight, so Jack and I will get back from the airport by ourselves. We can meet at the quay after you finish work.”

“Sounds like a plan. Will you take Jackie with you?”

“I could. You want me to?”

“Yeah, man. I missed the kid,” Dean replied, wondering why Cas was even asking such an obvious thing.

“Alright. I have to ask him first.”

“Sure thing. We could order a takeout and eat on Baby.”

Cas hummed approvingly, then fell silent for a beat before he spoke again. “And after that, would you come to my place?” He asked quietly, almost shy.

“Yeah. Why are you acting strange about it?”

“I’m not acting strange,” Cas muttered.

“You are,” Dean chuckled. “C’mon, tell me.”

“Fine,” Cas grumbled. Dean could just imagine the size of an eye roll he produced at that moment. “I’m not sleeping well lately,” he began. “I mean, since we came to Sweden.”

“Uh-huh,” Dean said, raising his eyebrow. “Sorry to hear that, but I still don’t know what it has to do with me.”

Cas sighed. “Alright. I sleep better with you, and I’d really like to have at least six hours of sleep. I’m just so very tired.”

“There you go. It wasn’t so hard, was it?” Dean said cheerfully.

“You know what, after additional consideration, you don't have to come,” Cas replied stubbornly.

“Touchy!” Dean chuckled. “Alright, easy there, tough guy. I wouldn’t wanna sleep anywhere else than next to your feathery ass, anyway.”

+

“Uncle Deeeeeeeeean!”

Dean managed to turn around and catch him before DJ hit his legs, this time. “Whoa! I swear you’re getting bigger every day, bud!” He said, picking the boy up. “But when Jack comes over in a moment, you have to hug him gently, alright?”

The kid nodded, vigorously bobbing his head up and down. If Dean tried to do the same thing, he’d probably break his neck.

“DJ, what did I tell you about running into people?” Dean heard Sammy’s resigned voice from behind him. When he glanced that way, he saw his quite tired brother walking in their direction from his pick-up truck, carrying mahogany planks.

“Sorry, Daddy,” DJ chuckled.

“Hiya, Sammy,” Dean said, then turned to the kid in his arms. “I’m gonna put you down now, 'cause I need to grab my tools from the trunk. Don’t go falling into the water,” he added. “Where are your girls?” He asked his brother, rummaging through the car.

“Home, resting,” Sammy replied. “Is the breach really this nasty?” He asked as they made their way toward the Impala.

“It is,” Dean sighed out. “Thanks for bringing the wood.”

“No problem. I’d like to help with patching Baby up if you don’t mind.”

Dean frowned. “It’s not exactly a safe environment for a five-year-old, you know that. Besides, I doubt you even remember how to do it properly.”

“Yeah, shut up,” Sam chuckled. “When I said Jack is going to be here, DJ demanded to go, too. I’m starting to suspect that along with his name, he inherited stubbornness from you as well.”

“You’ve gotta reap what you saw, man,” Dean replied with a smirk. “But I’m down for some quality time with you guys. I wish the circumstances were better, though,” he added, then placed the box he was holding on the quay in front of Baby. “Okay, we’ve gotta turn her around. The hole is on the other side,” he said, waving his hand in the direction of the bow. “But first, we’re gonna put a life jacket on this little squid right here,” he said, quickly catching the laughing boy by his waist and lifting him up.

Once DJ was secured and safe, they attached appropriately long lines to the bow and stern. Then, Dean put the fenders on the other side of Baby’s hull and went back on the quay. 

“You’re responsible for the stern. Don’t scratch her,” he directed Sam, then positioned himself where he intended Baby's bow to land. The maneuver wasn't overly complex, but Dean was wary of further damaging the Impala. "Steady now, Sammy," he urged, gently guiding his line and observing as the bow started to turn in his direction. As the stern reached a perpendicular angle to the quay, Dean heard DJ's delighted squeal to his right.

"Daddy, look! It's Jack!" The boy's excitement drew their attention to the parking lot where Jack and Cas were approaching.

“Remember what I told you about running!” Sam reminded his son, but Dean didn’t register his brother's words, completely absorbed in the sight before him. Castiel was wearing jeans and a navy hoodie, which was very unfair of him, to be honest, since Dean’s brain couldn’t exactly comprehend Cas’s softness in hoodies. To make matters worse, Cas was also sporting his sweet smile, the one that made his eyes crinkle.

“Dean, what are you doing? The bow's drifting away!" Sam's urgent voice broke through, his hands working to maneuver the Impala’s stern away from the quay. Dean's attention snapped back into focus, as he hastily pulled the line once more. Soon after, he noticed Cas’s strong arms to his left, grabbing hold of the guard rail in Baby's mid-section and preventing it from colliding with the quay.

“Boys, don’t come closer to the boat,” Cas warned the kids, then turned his head to the right. “Hello, Dean,” he murmured, amused, once Baby finally stopped moving.

“Hi,” Dean replied weakly. “And thanks,” he muttered in an undefined direction, feeling as his neck slightly reddened.

“No problem,” Cas rumbled, then turned to Dean’s brother. “Hello, Sam.”

“Hey,” Sammy replied, observing them with a stupid grin. Dean wanted to tell him to shove it up his ass, but Jack chose this moment to get closer, holding DJ's hand. The little boy was glued to his older friend, watching Jack's every move with awe in his eyes.

“Hello!” Jack said, raising his free hand in a greeting.

“Hiya, bud! Let me just uh,” Dean said, looking around for a cleat to finally secure Baby and properly greet the kid.

“You need a hand with that?” Cas asked, pointing at the line. Dean nodded, then passed the rope, getting a soft smooch in return. He cleared his throat, desperately trying to keep from flushing all the way to his ears. God, he had never been so embarrassingly in love in front of his brother before.

“Alright, come’ere, Jackie,” he said, turning to the boy, who hugged him tightly, with DJ just tagging along for an extra hug. The embrace was a little tricky due to the height difference of all three of them, so Dean crouched awkwardly to reach DJ as well.

“Oh shit,” Dean heard his brother's concerned voice a beat later. When he extricated himself from the small limbs and turned around, he saw Sam and Cas staring at the breach in the hull with wide eyes.

“Jack, can you take DJ inside and show him my stash of board games?” Dean asked. When Jack nodded, Dean helped both boys get on board and gave Jack the key to the boat, returning to the quay afterward. Once Dean was within reach, Cas immediately pulled him closer by his waist.

“Okay,” Dean muttered, putting his arms around his boyfriend. He was surrounded by the calming scent of the storm again, making him almost completely forget about any possible prying eyes. 

Well, apart from Sam's, that is.

“I’ve missed you,” Cas murmured into Dean’s neck, his warm breath sending pleasant shivers down Dean's spine.

“Yeah, me, too,” Dean whispered back, then slowly pulled away from the embrace, very aware that to his left, Sammy was making heart eyes at them. “Can you, like, mind your own business for five fucking seconds, bitch?” Dean asked quietly, making a face at his stupid brother.

“Dean,” Cas scolded, rolling his eyes.

“Don’t worry, Cas. My brother is just a complete jerk, I’m used to it,” Sam retorted, narrowing his eyes.

“You watching me greet my boyfriend is just creepy, Samantha.”

“You’re standing right in front of me, Dean.”

“Yeah? Then look the other way.”

“Can you two please stop arguing? This is absurd,” Cas interjected. “We should order something, and then take care of this hole,” he added, turning his gaze to the hull.

Sammy huffed. “Yeah, okay,” he said, then looked at the breach as well. “You weren’t kidding, Dean, it’s enormous.”

Dean rolled his eyes. Sam Winchester, subtle as ever. “Alright. How are we feeling about pizza?” He asked, pulling out his phone.

Once they managed to order their food, Dean started unpacking the tools and measuring the breach. Sammy wanted to help, but when Dean noticed how his brother held the scraper, he shooed him away, too anxious to allow him to work anywhere near Baby. Cas appeared to handle the tools a little better, but eventually, Dean's patience wore thin, and he instructed his boyfriend to just stand behind him and observe. Soon after, Sam and Cas engaged in a heated discussion about vegan cheese and tofu, which Dean promptly tuned out as he focused on repairing the boat.

When the pizza finally arrived twenty minutes later (vegan for Jack and Cas, vegetarian for the rest of them), they gathered in the cockpit, munching through their slices. Not long after, Jack and DJ began making silly faces at each other, which Sammy was trying, quite ineffectively, to prevent while discussing some environmental stuff with Cas.

Dean, who stole one vegan slice from Cas, couldn't wrap his head around how incredible it was to have them all sitting on his Baby, eating and laughing together. He always loved some family time, but sharing it all with an actual boyfriend and his kid felt like the kind of happiness Dean didn't really deserve. He pressed his thigh against Cas’s a little tighter, just to reassure himself that it was all real. Castiel shot him a quick smile and put his free hand on Dean’s leg, then focused back on responding to Sammy.

It was perfect, Dean decided, turning his face to the slowly setting sun and closing his eyes.

He must’ve spaced out, because some time later, a familiar phrase brought him back into focus.

"...pumping so much CO2 into the air, that the temperature of the oceans is constantly elevating. No wonder that the corals are stressed." Sam said, waving his hands in the air.

"Yes, the carbon dioxide production is disturbing," Cas replied. "I truly recommend watching this documentary, Sam."

Dean frowned. "About the Great Barrier Reef? You wanna tell me it actually exists?" He asked his boyfriend.

Cas shot him a grin, but before he could respond, Sammy decided to open his big mouth. "Of course, the Great Barrier Reef exists, Dean. You thought it doesn’t?"

Dean turned to his incredibly stupid brother. “I swear Mum must've, like, dropped you when you were a baby or something. There is no way you’re just this irritating without a good reason,” he said, watching satisfied as Sammy started gaping like a fish taken out of the water.

“I think Jack might be more mature than you two,” Cas commented, raising his brow at Dean. “And yes, the document not only exists, but you’re watching it with me tonight.”

“Come on, man!” Dean whined.

“Ha!” Sam said, pointing a finger at his brother.

“Dad, you shouldn’t point your fingers at people, you said that yourself,” DJ chastened him with a frown.

“Yeah, Sammy,” Dean chuckled, then glanced at Cas, who was observing him with a flat expression. “What?”

Cas looked like he wanted to say something, but eventually just sighed and turned his gaze back at Dean’s brother. “Sam, would you and Eileen be so kind as to take care of Jack on Friday night? Dean and I want to go out with Charlie and Dorothy.”

Sam smiled, then nodded, glancing at the very excited-looking Jack and DJ. “Sure. We love having him around.”

“Yeeeees!” DJ exclaimed, then started doing some complicated dance movements, Jack following suit soon after. “C’mon, Jack, let’s finish ‘Go Fish’ below the deck,” the little boy added a moment later, then pulled his older friend in the direction of the companionway.

“I didn’t tell you both this yet, mainly because Dean is really weird about it,” Sam started, glancing at Cas, just as the boys disappeared inside the Impala.

“Hey!” Dean tried to interfere, but Sammy continued, ignoring his brother.

“...But I’m really happy that you worked things out between you two. Seriously, you’re great together,” he ended with a grin.

“I’m not weird about that,” Dean tried again, but this time, Castiel started talking before Dean could finish his brilliant thought.

“Thank you, Sam. You’re incredibly kind,” he said, taking Dean’s hand into his. It was probably aimed to calm Dean down and shut him up, but it was nice anyway. 

“Seriously, Cas, you’re great. I’m relieved that Dean finally found someone he-” Sam started, then noticed Dean’s terrified look and subtle shake of his head. “-uh… he feels so comfortable with,” Sam finished with a strangled smile, getting a head tilt and a suspicious expression from Cas in return.

“Yeah, speaking of which!” Dean interjected, desperate to change the subject. God, telling Sammy about his feelings for Cas had been a mistake. “I get that you’re excited, or whatever, but you’ve gotta take a chill pill with all the photo insanity, Sammy. I mean, getting all crazy in the comments on Facebook is one thing, but putting a picture straight out of a chick-flick on our company’s promotional material is another. What the hell, man?” Dean asked with a frown.

Sam chuckled nervously. “It was just an idea. I wouldn’t put it out there without consulting it with you, first.”

Dean narrowed his eyes. He couldn’t quite shake the feeling that his brother was acting strange about it all, but he decided to let it go, for now. He could totally get more info from Charlie first, simply because she would cave faster than Sammy.

“Right, yeah,” he muttered. “Just stop being creepy about us, or we’ll stop coming over for family dinners. And no more of this wedding shit on any Singer & Winchesters ads, you hear me?”

“I hear you,” Sam replied with a tight smile.

“Good,” Dean said, then looked at Cas by his side. God, he was one, pretty sonofabitch. “Speaking of family dinners, Bobby invited us all to come over for Thanksgiving. He got to the point of pestering me about it, so I’ve gotta ask if you and Jack wanna go.”

Cas’s eyes slightly widened. “To Newport?” He asked, briefly glancing at Sam, then turning back to Dean. “We’d have to fly there.”

Dean rolled his eyes, but couldn't suppress the grin that tugged at the corners of his lips. “Yeah, I know.” Seeing Cas suddenly looking a little nervous, Dean quickly added, “We don’t have to go if you don’t want to.” Perhaps it was a little too soon to throw Castiel into the deep end and drag him over to the States, after all.

Cas shook his head, an unsure look on his face slowly transforming into a determined expression. “No, I’d love to meet Bobby and the rest of your family, Dean,” he said, his voice steady and resolute.

Dean snorted. “Cas, c’mon, It’s just our old man. I want you to be able to relax there,” he said, rubbing his thumb over Castiel's hand.

“Dean’s right, Bobby’s really chill. No need to worry,” Sam supplied.

“I understand,” Cas said, smiling a little. “But it’s important for me to make a good first impression.”

“Stop it, he’s gonna love you. They’re all gonna love you,” Dean chuckled, glancing at Sam for support. His brother nodded solemnly.

Cas’s smile widened. “Thank you,” he said softly. “So, I assume your family is going too, Sam?” 

“Yeah, as long as nobody will suddenly get sick or something,” Sam replied. “You can never know with so many children.”

Cas hummed, then nodded. “I know what you mean. And how long will we be staying there?”

“A few days. We thought about going on the 21st of November, and coming back here on the 25th,” Sam informed.

“Is it really okay if we all go there and leave the whole company unsupervised?” Cas asked, glancing between the brothers.

"Yeah, we decided a few years back that we should give our employees Thursday and Friday off, allowing them to have a long weekend. Many of them have family and friends in the States, so they wanna visit them, too," Dean explained.

“That’s very considerate of you,” Cas said. “Alright. I should talk with Jack, but I’m pretty sure he’d love to go, so you can count us in.”

Dean grinned, relieved. "That’s what I’m talking about. Let me just tell you, it’s gonna be a hell of a family trip," he added, already planning to take Cas and Jack to his favorite places in Newport. "Alright, let me clean the breach a little longer and we can head home," he said, then kissed Cas’s knuckles and let go of his hand, ignoring Sam’s sparkly eyes as he made his way to the quay.

He had suspected that he wouldn’t accomplish much in repairing the hole that day if his family joined him, but he wouldn't trade this afternoon for any other.

+

“Oh shit,” Dean muttered when he entered Cas’s bedroom some time later, dressed in his underwear and ready for sleep. “You picked up your glasses,” he added, moving towards Cas with wide eyes and a stupid grin.

Castiel, lying on the bed with a book opened in front of him, raised his eyebrow and looked up. His new glasses, with thin black rims, reflected the soft light coming from the lamp on the bedside table.

“Yes, I’m supposed to use them for reading and watching any kind of screen. What are you doing-”

“Ooh, shut up, you hot nerd,” Dean interjected excitedly, straddling his boyfriend and diving in for a kiss in a few swift movements. He wrapped one hand around Cas’s neck and blindly reached for the book digging into his stomach with the other, tossing it on the floor without breaking the kiss. Cas seemed surprised at first, but quickly caught up with the program, letting his warm hands travel over Dean’s bare back and neck while licking between Dean’s waiting lips.

Making out was all fun and games, but very soon Dean turned into a panting, needy mess, with his hard dick trapped between them. Just as he was internally scolding himself for yet again doing things before thinking them through, he felt Cas’s hands slowly sliding down to his forearms. He tried to slightly pull away to see what was going on, but when he finally managed to raise his head a little, Castiel wrapped Dean’s wrists in one hand with a mischievous grin. Dean glanced at his joined palms dumbly, then back up at Cas’s flushed face and his eyes gleaming behind his new glasses. Before Dean could react, Castiel pulled his wrists up, then encircled Dean's shoulder blades with his free hand and rolled them both over. Dean landed on his back, astonished, with his hands above his head and a very eager Cas in between his thighs, pinning him to the mattress. He stifled a moan threatening to escape his throat.

“Are you okay?” Cas asked quietly, his voice breaking a little in the middle. Dean glanced up at Cas’s hand, firmly holding his wrists, then back at his smiling boyfriend.

“Uh-huh,” he responded impatiently, attempting to reach Cas's lips at the same time, but to no avail. Cas observed him squirming for a moment, then dove to Dean’s mouth only to leave there exactly one, wet kiss before retreating again. Dean whined.

“Be nice, or we won’t play,” Cas gently scolded, making Dean’s dick twitch.

Dean grinned. “You weren’t kidding about being bossy, huh?”

Castiel hesitated. “Should I stop?”

“God, no!” Dean said quickly, shaking his head. He had absolutely no idea what Cas wanted to even do to him, since he still didn’t have his results back (they got temporarily lost somewhere, apparently), but he sure as fuck didn’t want to stop that, whatever they were doing. 

Cas hummed approvingly, then lowered himself again, capturing Dean’s lower lip in between his mouth. He was teasing Dean a little with the kiss, giving him only partly what he yearned for. Dean quickly discovered that the more he pushed and tried to use his tongue, the more his boyfriend slowed the pace, or even withdrew, raising an eyebrow and waiting for Dean to calm down, while leaving open mouth kisses on his jaw and cheeks. It looked just as if Castiel was trying to wordlessly persuade Dean to hand over the lead and enjoy whatever Cas wanted to give him. 

So Dean finally did. With his hands still immobilized, there was not much he could do, anyway. And it wasn’t even that he wanted to do something. To be honest, with Castiel's weight on him and a sweet mouth nibbling and licking his, Dean wouldn’t even dream of complaining.

Soon after, Cas slid his free hand up from Dean’s hip to his collarbone and started gently tracing his fingertips along the hot skin on Dean's chest, leaving a vibrating sensation in their wake. He drew very near to Dean's nipples a few times, only to retreat a moment later, making Dean's head spin. Once he seemed satisfied with the state Dean was in - which was a gooey puddle on the bed, at this point - he pushed his tongue forward, entwining it with Dean's, who gasped into Cas's mouth. His back arched up, hungry for more of Castiel's touch, and Cas clearly decided to take mercy on him, because his fingers finally closed on Dean's left nipple, stroking and caressing it in circular motions.

Dean would probably be very ashamed of the sound he let out at this moment, but fortunately, he was too out of it to even register it.

“Try to stay quiet,” Castiel whispered softly, pulling away a little, only to put his lips on Dean's other nipple and start gently sucking it.

Dean almost didn't suppress a groan, but he somehow managed to control himself. Cas'd told him to stay quiet, and for some unclear reason, Dean really wanted to do just that. 

All the sensations flooding his brain were almost too much, yet they weren't anywhere close to what Dean truly needed. His dick started to edge toward painful, desperate for any kind of friction, no matter how small, but his hips were still trapped between Cas’s thighs, therefore he was unable to do anything about it. Meanwhile, Castiel seemed determined to do everything in his power to make Dean moan loudly - after a few excruciating moments of nibbling and sucking, he switched to the other nipple, repeating the process of driving Dean crazy all over again.

“Oh my,” Cas rasped out with awe a while later. Dean, who had closed his eyes in an attempt to not completely melt away and stay quiet, managed to look down at his boyfriend, panting heavily. “You are so, so beautiful,” Cas breathed out, releasing a grip on Dean’s wrists and bringing one of Dean’s hands to his lips.

Dean felt a warm flush creeping up his neck and onto his cheeks. Being praised like that felt incredibly personal, hitting him on a completely different level than he was used to dealing with. It was as intense as Cas’s blue gaze, exposing Dean in a way that made him feel very vulnerable. Strangely enough, he didn’t feel particularly scared of those feelings. A little uncomfortable perhaps, but not in a way that made him want to curl and hide from Cas’s warm eyes.

“Can I touch you?” Castiel asked quietly, lifting his face to Dean’s level and placing his free hand flat on Dean’s stomach.

Yesyesyesyesyesyes! - Dean’s stupid brain started shouting on repeat. He swallowed heavily, trying to find any remaining shreds of logical thinking in his head.

“I don’t have my results yet,” he finally managed to say, searching Cas’s face.

“I know, but we can use a condom. I want to make you feel good. Will you let me?” Cas asked, his voice dropping even lower.

Dean would probably let Cas suck his soul out of him right now, so he smiled and said, “Yeah. Yeah, I’d like that.”

“Alright,” Cas rumbled with a grin, then kissed Dean’s knuckles again and shifted to reach a drawer in his bedside table. Dean followed a movement with his gaze, suddenly feeling a little nervous. Would it hurt? Was he supposed to do something before they started? He knew that he was completely safe in Cas’s hands, but still, the sheer thought of going all in right now made him feel a little unprepared. 

Cas returned a moment later without his glasses, tossing a small bottle of lube and a condom on the bed beside Dean. When his gaze landed on Dean’s face, however, his eyes turned worried. 

“Are you okay?” He asked, tilting his head. “We don’t have to do anything if you don’t feel like it.”

“No, that’s not it,” Dean said with a nervous chuckle. “I’m just not sure what to expect, I guess.”

Cas lowered down and propped himself up on his elbow beside Dean, reaching for his hand. “Of course,” he murmured, caressing Dean's fingers. “I will start with kissing your neck, because you seem to be stressed again, and I want to make sure you’re relaxed before moving any further,” he added, making Dean shiver slightly. “Then, I’d like to remove your underwear, put a condom on your perfect dick, and give you the best blowjob you’ve ever had, while making sure you won’t wake up the whole building with your moans,” he ended, observing his boyfriend calmly, as if he hadn't just said almost the filthiest thing Dean had heard in his whole life.

“Oh,” Dean said, finally finding a tongue in his mouth. “I thought you’re gonna fuck me.”

Cas’s lips formed a small smile. “No, I’m not. Not until you fuck me first, Dean, but it won’t happen today, either. One step at a time,” he said, playing with Dean’s fingers.

“That sounds reasonable,” Dean said with a shy grin, turning to his side to face Cas fully. He bit his lower lip and slowly leaned forward in an attempt to lure his boyfriend back in without the need to talk about it, but Cas's hand on his torso stopped him in his tracks. 

“What do you want, Dean?” Castiel asked. “I need you to tell me. I need you also to say if you won’t feel sure you want to proceed anymore, even if we were in the middle of sex. I will stop then.”

Honestly, Dean was very lucky that Cas’s voice was so low and hot, considering how much the dude wanted to talk about stuff instead of just doing them. He sighed, then let a cocky grin fully form on his face. “I want you to blow me, Cas,” he replied, watching fascinated as Cas’s gaze slowly turned heated again.

“Very well,” Castiel murmured, then slowly slid his hand down to Dean's stomach, hooking his pointing finger over the band of his briefs. Dean's breath hitched. Castiel grinned, then slipped the finger a little lower, moving it slowly from side to side. Dean watched the movement, mesmerized. Finally, Cas slid his hand inside of Dean's briefs, and just when Dean thought his dick would get some very needed action, Castiel put his palm on his hip bone. Dean muffled a groan, frustrated.

“Cas,” he started, ready to give the whole talk about teasing and blue balls, but just then Castiel moved his hand to Dean's ass and pulled Dean closer, aligning their dicks. A jolt of pleasure pierced through Dean's whole body, extracting a quiet moan out of him. He didn't have time to collect himself, however, because Cas decided to resume their kissing session, killing the last brain cell that fought inside of Dean's head in the process.

And Castiel wasn't fucking around this time, either. He sucked and used his tongue and teeth with all intensity, massaging Dean's ass in a way that made Dean crave for more. He suddenly needed to be even closer, so he sneaked his hand under Cas’s T-shirt and wrapped it around his back, gaining some leverage. Castiel clearly had something else in mind for them though, because when Dean began rhythmically thrusting his hips, grinding against Cas's hot groin, Castiel pushed on Dean’s chest until his back touched the mattress again. Dean, not particularly happy with this turn of events, frowned at Cas, who was now kneeling between Dean’s thighs, his very interested cock lifting the fabric of his pants.

“So impatient,” Cas murmured, crawling on top of Dean and pinning him down to the bed once more with a wide grin. “It wouldn’t kill you if you waited for a few more seconds,” he said, then started trailing his way to Dean's neck with hot kisses.

“Someone’s sarcastic,” Dean breathed out, rolling his eyes. 

Cas stopped moving for a moment, shooting Dean an amused look. “And you discovered it just now?” He asked, then tilted Dean’s head, exposing his neck. Dean had a brilliant idea to say something back, but when Cas caught Dean's sensitive skin between his teeth, Dean quickly forgot what he even wanted to say, too preoccupied with restraining himself from moaning like an inexperienced virgin.

It was very new to him, to stay strictly at the receiving end of things, but with Cas, this whole affair was so much fucking different. From every angle, he was hit with those amazing sensations that slowly took him apart, bit by bit. It was the way Castiel smelled and sounded, the way his hot tongue felt on Dean's neck, and his stubble scratched Dean's cheek. His moves were deliberate and sure, his strong hands holding Dean exactly where Cas wanted him to be. It all made Dean feel safe and relaxed, allowing him to just let go and enjoy the ride.

“You are perfect,” Cas said a moment later, his deep voice vibrating in Dean’s ear. “Can I touch you, Dean?”

This time, Dean didn't hesitate. When he nodded, Cas almost immediately moved, licking his way down to Dean's underwear.

“Up,” Castiel instructed, hooking his thumbs on the band of Dean's briefs.

Once Dean finally broke free from the offensive piece of clothing, his dick immediately bobbed up, almost hitting Cas in the face. It would be even funny if Dean wasn't so desperate for release at this point. 

Castiel straightened up, sitting on his heels, his gaze lingering on Dean's naked body. He bit his lower lip, then put his big hands high on Dean's thighs and slowly slid them up to his abdomen, deliberately avoiding Dean's hard cock on his way. Dean whimpered quietly.

“Perfect,” Cas repeated under his breath, sliding his palms back down, this time putting a bit more pressure on Dean's skin. Then, he finally reached for the condom and started unpacking it with his teeth.

“I can do it,” Dean rasped out, spreading his knees a little wider to make more space for his boyfriend.

“No,” Cas simply stated, raising his eyebrow. He did a quick work with the packaging, then threw it on the floor and grasped the base of Dean's dick. Dean almost passed out, and then again, when Cas rolled the condom all the way down. He watched, mesmerized, as Castiel lowered his face to Dean’s groin and started nibbling on the skin around his cock, immediately soothing the little bites with his wet tongue. It was extremely pleasurable, but it was almost nothing compared to the feeling of Cas's mouth finally, finally touching his aching dick a moment later. Dean bit his lips to silence a groan that wanted to break through, his eyes rolling backward and his whole body tensing up with the incredible sensation. For a moment, he was actually scared he'd just come there and then, but he somehow managed to get a hold of himself, tightly gripping the dark green blanket beneath him.

When he opened his eyes again, he saw a truly sinful sight of Cas's pink lips enveloped around the head of his cock, and a piercing, blue gaze focused on Dean's face.

“Oh shit,” Dean breathed out, panting heavily. Cas raised his eyebrows as if he was asking if Dean was okay. Dean would laugh at the sheer absurdity of that question, but he wasn't completely sure if he had any control over his facial muscles, so he just nodded once.

Cas blinked, then slid down on Dean's dick, taking a base in his hand before he slid back up, stopping on the head and licking it experimentally as if only to see how Dean would react to it.

On his end, Dean had to fight himself to not thrust back into the heat of Cas's mouth. He let out one, shaky breath, trying to calm himself down, but it proved completely futile.

Castiel seemed satisfied with what he saw, because a beat later he dove back down, purring around Dean's length and sending a rush of elation through his entire body. He took Dean in as far as he could, stretching his throat in the process, then moved back up, swirling his tongue skilfully around the head. He was clearly still testing the waters, but Dean was already very close, so when a moment later Cas finally seemed to establish a pace, stroking the shaft with his hand while moving his head up and down, Dean knew it was only a matter of seconds before he came. He couldn’t do anything about a moan that escaped from his throat, too absorbed in consuming him pleasure.

Suddenly, he heard a ‘pop’ sound, followed by an unpleasant, cold sensation on his penis, indicating that Cas's hot mouth had moved elsewhere. Before Dean could find enough brainpower to protest, Cas’s tongue slipped between his lips, leaving behind a very slurpy kiss, tasting a little like banana-flavored latex.

“Shh, be good,” Cas whispered into Dean’s ear when he pulled away slightly “Can you do it for me?” He asked before he sucked on Dean’s earlobe. Dean held back a groan, then nodded, staring into the ocean eyes.

“Very good,” Cas praised quietly and kissed Dean’s lips one more time before retreating back down. This time, however, Cas kneeled beside Dean’s right thigh, and looked up, giving Dean enough time to protest, if Dean - for whatever, crazy reason - suddenly changed his mind. When Dean nodded, Cas, without a second thought, dove back down, swallowing almost all of Dean’s dick in one, graceful movement.

Dean bit his lips to stay silent. He didn’t even know it was possible to look elegant while giving a blowjob, but obviously, Castiel found a way to do just that. He gently squeezed the base of Dean’s cock with his hand, then raised his head back up, stopping at the tip and flicking his tongue over it. Dean shivered, then swallowed, observing intently how his boyfriend started bobbing his head up and down at a steady pace, sucking on Dean’s dick. With each dive, Castiel seemed to go a little deeper, the insides of his mouth pressing tighter on Dean’s shaft, driving him to the verge of combusting stupidly fast.

“Cas,” Dean groaned quietly, feeling a familiar pressure quickly building in his groin. Castiel hummed around Dean’s dick, sending another surge of pleasure through him. It was starting to become very tricky to hold back moans, so Dean wasn't even surprised when Cas's left palm covered his mouth. He was surprised, however, when he felt Cas's right hand traveling down to his testicles, stroking and massaging them in a circular motion. If that alone wasn't enough to make Dean come instantly, Cas also picked up the pace, leaving Dean no choice but to surrender to the overwhelming, pure bliss that flooded his mind. He moaned loudly into Cas's hand, blindly reaching for his ruffled hair and entangling his fingers in dark, silky strands. Luckily, he had enough mental capacity left to refrain from pulling Cas’s head closer to his groin - he wasn’t an animal and he didn’t want to choke his boyfriend, of all people - but it was a close call. Like a real gentleman, Castiel waited out Dean's shooting his load into the condom, keeping his pulsing cock firmly between his warm lips and massaging Dean’s slightly shaky thighs.

“Wow,” Dean muttered under his breath, slowly coming down from the huge wave of endorphins. He blinked, then looked down, meeting Cas’s mischievous grin and gleaming eyes. He was still kneeling beside Dean’s legs, with his warm palms lying flat on Dean’s overheated skin.

“Are you alright?” He asked, because of course he did.

“I can’t complain,” Dean retorted, propping himself on his elbows. “Damn, Cas,” he added, grinning back. 

Cas hummed, then looked at his hands. “So, you liked it?” He asked almost shyly.

“Did I like it? I loved it!” Dean chuckled, then sat up to get rid of the sad condom still hanging on his slowly deflating cock. “Come’ere,” he said a moment later, laying back down on the bed and reaching for Cas’s hand to pull his boyfriend closer. Once Castiel settled beside him, Dean gave him a nice, lazy, wet kiss. “You taste like a banana,” he chuckled a moment later, suddenly feeling giddy “Where did you even get those condoms from?” He asked, biting his lower lip. 

“These were the only ones they had,” Cas retorted with a grin, then leaned forward, kissing Dean a little deeper. He was still clearly aroused, and Dean had never been one to leave his partners unsatisfied. Since he wasn’t sure if he would be able to perform a blowjob without any instructions, he decided to do the second thing that came to his mind.

When Cas pulled away from the kiss a moment later, Dean grasped his chin, glancing between pretty, ocean eyes. “My turn, Angel. Can I touch you?” He asked.

Castiel covered Dean’s hand with his. “You can touch me wherever you please, Dean,” was what he said in this ridiculously deep voice of his.

Dean didn’t even try fighting the redness that crept onto his cheeks. “That’s… yeah, okay,” he said, pulling Cas for another kiss - there was no need to talk now, anyway. He slid his hand under Cas's T-shirt, exploring the skin on his boyfriend's broad back. He'd never had such a buff partner before, he thought, gently massaging the muscles surrounding Cas's shoulder blades. Castiel purred into his mouth. Dean grinned, then deepened the kiss, slowly sliding his hand down to Cas's waist.

“I'm gonna…” he breathed out a moment later, tugging on the hem of Castiel's T-shirt. Cas got the message, slightly moving away to help Dean with undressing. 

“You've got very sexy collarbones, you know that?” Dean said, taking in the miles of tanned skin that appeared before him. 

Cas snorted. “Thank you. Nobody ever said that about my collarbones.”

“Well, that’s just a damn shame,” Dean replied, leaning in and melding their lips together. When he put his palms on Castiel’s warm chest, he could feel his boyfriend’s quickened heartbeat underneath his fingers. He smiled, then covered Cas’s nipples with his thumbs and started rubbing them gently. Castiel gasped into his mouth. Encouraged, Dean continued petting the sensitive skin until Cas started to shiver, humming with pleasure. Dean slightly pulled away to admire his work, before he closed the separating them gap once more, letting his hands wander again. Castiel had an incredible body, feeling all firm and smooth under the gentle touch, so when Dean’s hands traveled below the band of Cas’s pants, he wasn’t even surprised that Castiel’s ass turned out to be as loaded with muscles, as the rest of Cas. Dean broke the kiss, then slowly pulled the soft fabric down Castiel’s thighs, releasing his dripping dick. It was a very handsome dick.

Dean’s mouth watered. He looked back up. Castiel was observing him with a hungry look, his pupils dilated and his plush lips slightly parted.

Waiting.

He was absolutely, exceptionally beautiful, with his hands pressed flat against Dean’s chest, struggling to catch a breath.

I love you, Dean thought, running his fingertips up and down Cas’s hot cock before closing his palm on the shaft. Castiel leaned his head on Dean’s shoulder and silenced a moan.

God, Dean wanted to keep this man for the rest of eternity.

There wasn't much philosophy involved in the hand job, so Dean smeared the precum on the head, then started stroking him, watching fascinated as his boyfriend struggled to stay quiet. Seeing Castiel losing his normally steady demeanor from Dean’s touch alone felt unreal, almost as if Dean was doing something illegal. He glanced down, then stopped his hand at the swollen tip, rubbing small circles with his thumb. It was getting a little too dry for Dean's liking, so he pushed on Cas's hip, making him lay flat on the mattress, then patted the bed in search of the little bottle. Once he found it, Dean squeezed a substantial amount of lube on his hand and warmed it up between his fingers, glancing back at Castiel.

Spread on the bed, with his eyes half open and his hard dick angling upwards, Cas looked like a wet dream - Dean was quite positive that if he were younger, he would be able to get it up again from the sheer view alone. He swallowed, then lay down on his side next to Cas, leaning forward for a kiss. When he wrapped his wet fingers around the base of Cas's cock a moment later, a deep groan left Castiel's throat. Dean silenced it with his tongue, then started moving his hand up and down, finally finding a pace that seemed to bring out the dirtiest sounds from Cas. Every few pumps, he stopped at the head, massaging it gently and playing with the tip of Cas’s swollen dick, just as Dean himself liked to be handled - he had probably never been more grateful for having a penis in his entire life. Castiel seemed to slowly lose control over his body, because soon after, he started thrusting his hips in small movements, urging Dean’s hand to move faster. Knowing Castiel was now close, Dean formed a tunnel with his palm and broke the kiss, getting Cas’s attention.

“Fuck my fist, Angel,” he whispered, glancing between the blue eyes, before licking his way back inside Castiel’s waiting, hot mouth. Cas groaned, then planted his feet firmly on the mattress and began frantically pumping his leaking cock deep into Dean’s hand. It wasn't long before his movements became more erratic and he started to slightly shake in Dean's arms. Feeling that, Dean tightened his grip a little and petted the head of Cas’s dick with his thumb, tipping his boyfriend over the edge. As the hot, sticky cum covered his fingers, Dean greedily swallowed all of Cas’s sweet moans and whimpers, thoroughly impressed by his own cock, which clearly tried to get hard again.

Once Cas’s heart stopped pounding wildly in his chest and their kiss turned from hot and needy to lazy and slow, Dean finally pulled himself away, admiring a satisfied expression that appeared on Castiel’s face. 

“You okay, sweetheart?” Dean asked quietly before tenderly kissing Cas’s nose.

Cas purred, closing his eyes and gently stretching. “Very,” he replied a moment later, then opened his eyes and cupped Dean’s cheek. “What about you?”

Dean pursed his lips, attempting to appear contemplative. “I think I don't want us to ever leave this bed again. Do you think we could somehow pull that off?”

Cas bit his lower lip, trying to contain a laugh that wanted to break through. “I mean, we could always try,” he said, then raised his head, glancing down. “But perhaps we should clean ourselves first. Can you reach the drawer? I’ve got some wet wipes hidden there.”

Dean nodded, then turned to the bedside table. When he opened the drawer, however, his gaze landed on the colorful objects lying next to the banana condoms. He gulped, then grabbed wet wipes, and turned back to Cas, handing him the package.

“Thank you,” Cas said, pulling out a moistened sheet that he used to clean his spent dick and legs from the remnants of his cum. Dean followed suit, cleaning his hand, then stood up, collecting all of the used wipes and a condom he’d tossed earlier under the bed. “Are you alright?” He heard from behind when he marched to the bin.

“Yeah, why wouldn’t I be?”

Cas hummed, narrowing his eyes. He was still lying naked on the sheets, propping his head on his elbow. “I’m not sure,” he murmured while Dean put his briefs back on. “If I didn’t know any better, I’d say that my sex toys freaked you out.”

Dean sighed. Cas's perceptiveness was starting to get on his nerves. “It didn’t freak me out,” he muttered, walking back to the bed. “Okay, maybe it did, a little, but it’s not uh… it’s not that, exactly,” he admitted, scooting closer to Cas, who pulled his pajama pants back up. “I guess I just remembered how deep in the woods I am about all that, y’know?” He added when Castiel covered them both with a warm blanket and settled comfortably beside Dean.

“Was it too much for you?” Cas asked, finding Dean’s hand under the covers and grasping it gently. “Perhaps I shouldn’t restrict your movements during our first time together,” he added, suddenly looking worried.

“God, no, what are you even talking about?” Dean said with a frown. “I’m just saying that I’m, like, ridiculously inexperienced, you goof. I can read about gay sex all I want, but it’ll only give me the basics. I’ll need your guidance in so many things, dude. Do you really wanna waste your time on that?”

Cas’s worried expression slowly transformed into a sweet smile. “Oh, Dean,” he murmured. “Spending any amount of time with you is as far from wasting it as possible. You make me exceptionally happy. Being the one who will guide you through all of this…” he said, running his finger across Dean’s lower lip. “There is so much more I want to do with you. If you want it too, of course,” he added, stroking Dean’s cheek with his thumb.

Dean couldn’t help but smile back. “Yeah, okay,” he said, feeling vulnerable. He looked down, turning his eyes away from Cas’s intense, soft eyes. “In that case, you’ve gotta teach me how to do a blowjob. It felt amazing,” he muttered.

“Of course. I’m very happy you liked it,” Cas rumbled, pulling Dean closer and locking him between his arms in a warm hug. They stayed like that for a few moments, until Cas moved away a little, grasping Dean’s chin in his hand. “Now, that everything is clear again,” he said slowly with a playful smirk, “are you ready to watch the documentary about the Great Barrier Reef with me?”

Chapter Text

“Dean, stop it or there will be no breakfast,” Cas chuckled, struggling to flip a pancake with Dean plastered to his back, arms wrapped around Cas’s abdomen. Dean had been right, their height difference was ideal for him to reach Castiel’s neck freely. His skin was a little salty, and every time Dean used his teeth or tongue, Cas slightly shivered.

It was so much fucking better than in his fantasy, he thought, nuzzling behind Cas’s ear.

“Dean,” Cas repeated. “If you won't stop, I’ll bend you over the kitchen counter,” he said quietly, making Dean's eyes widen.

“Oh fuck,” Dean mumbled to himself. He was really curious how it would feel to be bent over the kitchen counter by Castiel, but he somehow realized that 7:45 in the morning on Thursday wasn’t the perfect moment for such an activity. “Alright, no kissing on the neck,” Dean replied, hooking his chin over Cas’s shoulder with a pout.

Cas hummed, placing the freshly cooked pancake onto the stack of others already resting on the plate. Then, he reached for the batter mixture to start cooking another one. “Do you want to go to the gym with me today?” He asked, pouring the fluid into the pan.

“Yes,” Dean replied firmly. He'd planned to make progress on Baby's repairs, but Castiel in shorts, lifting weights, made him forget all about it. Besides, Dean had promised Jack some vegan sushi, and he didn't want to test the young man's patience. “Dinner's at my place, then? We could get Jackie on our way back from the gym and watch a movie together.”

“Sounds good,” Cas replied, flipping the pancake. “Did you, by any chance, find my white shirt at your apartment? I don't know where it is.”

Dean smiled. “Yeah, man. I washed it.”

“Oh. Thank you,” Cas said, then turned his face to give Dean a small kiss. The truth was, they had both started leaving some clothes and other stuff in each other's apartment. Dean had at least three pairs of Cas's underwear and sweatpants in his wardrobe by now, and just because Castiel had left it there, not because Dean was a creep. He was also quite positive that Cas had his own, small collection of Dean's clothes hidden in his drawers. 

“Alright, that was the last one,” Cas said, turning off the burner and setting the pan aside. Dean observed him for a moment before gathering enough courage to bring up the topic that had refused to leave his head since the previous night.

“Cas, remember when you said you wanted to wait with sex until we both got tested?” he finally asked.

Cas sighed, then slowly turned around to face Dean. “Yes, I do,” he said, looking sheepish.

Dean glanced between Cas's eyes. As amazing as it had felt to take the next step in their relationship, it had also been quite unexpected, and Dean's gut told him that there was more to Cas's spontaneous decision than met the eye.

“I mean, I get that we can use condoms, and I'm definitely not gonna complain, coz, y'know,” Dean said, grinning stupidly. Cas smiled back at him. “But I thought you wanted to be sure we're both healthy before we do anything else. What changed?”

Castiel looked down. “I just… I really missed you, and when you started kissing me like that…,” he trailed off, then shrugged helplessly, looking back up.

Dean grinned wider. “Are you saying I'm irresistible, sunshine?”

“Yes, well, it's quite challenging to think clearly when you squirm on the top of my dick, Dean,” Castiel retorted.

“Alright, I'll take it,” Dean said, then leaned forward and resumed kissing Cas's neck. There was no point in pressing Castiel any further, anyway. 

Cas tilted his head, granting Dean better access. “We should get dressed,” he said quietly a moment later, sounding as if he didn't really want to go anywhere. Then, he lifted Dean’s chin and brought their mouths together. Dean considered once again, for probably the hundredth time that day, what was even the point of going to work when they had a perfectly functioning bed right here.

“Whoa, fellas! Isn't it a little too early to bang in the kitchen?” Gabe asked while entering the room, grinning stupidly.

Cas sighed, pulling away from Dean’s lips. “Hello, Gabriel,” he said, only briefly glancing at his brother, then boring his blue gaze into Dean’s soul. 

“You are exceptionally intense this morning,” Gabriel chuckled a moment later, moving to the counters. “You two kids had fun last night?” He asked, reaching for a mug. Dean felt Castiel tensing in his arms.

“Yeah,” Dean retorted with a stupid grin of his own. “Why, you jealous of our evening or something?”

“Oh, Dean-o, you sweet, summer child! I don’t get jealous. But since the mere thought of my lil bro having sex is the most disturbing thing ever, please, shut up now.”

“You started it, man.”

“And I’m regretting it immensely. Oh, pancakes!” Gabriel said, reaching to the stack on the plate. Cas moved his arm terrifyingly fast, batting his brother’s hand away. 

“No, we’ll eat together by the table. Now, help me with the plates and toppings,” he said, pointing at the fridge. Dean had the stupidest thought that Cas had probably never asked for help in topping before in his life, but he decided to keep his mouth shut, obediently marching to the fridge.

Five minutes later, when Dean was in the middle of arranging the cutlery and napkins in a way that didn't bug him, he heard Jack’s excited voice from behind. He turned around to greet the kid, only to yelp and throw everything he was still holding on the floor. On Jack’s arms sat a disturbingly red and orange, absolutely terrifying snake. Dean retreated behind the chair standing nearby.

“Dean, I wanted you to meet Felix!” Jack chirped, walking in the direction of the chair. Dean started moving backward, holding the chair in front of him like a shield. 

“That’s not the best idea, Jackie,” he managed to say weakly.

Just then, Cas and Gabe entered the room, carrying the rest of the food inside. Dean’s pleading gaze landed on his boyfriend. 

“Oh, this is gonna be good,” Gabriel chuckled, walking to the table to put away the plates he was holding.

“Jack, why did you take Felix out of his terrarium?” Castiel asked calmly, glancing at Dean with a suspiciously blank face.

Jack frowned at him. “Because Dean didn’t get the chance to meet Felix yet.”

“Right, of course,” Cas responded. Dean gulped. “I think it would be better for both of them to meet while Felix is inside of the terrarium.”

Jack looked unconvinced. He glanced at Dean, who tried to act normal. “Why are you afraid of him? He’s harmless,” Jack stated, tilting his head to the side. “And quite friendly. He likes to be patted on the head,” he added, clearly waiting for Dean to react in any way.

Dean knew that his fear was quite stupid, but there was no freaking way he’d touch the vicious animal hissing in Jack’s arms. “I bet he is, bud,” he finally said. “Can you uh… give me some time to get used to the idea first? I didn’t even know that he was here, I’m a little… surprised,” he added, shooting Castiel a pointedly irritated look.

Cas’s gaze turned sheepish. “Yes, well, it didn’t come up,” he muttered, then looked back at his son. “Could you please put Felix back and wash your hands? Breakfast is ready.”

When Jack and the snake left the room, Dean almost collapsed on the chair in front of him. “The damn snake’s here and you didn’t even think of telling me this? What the hell, Cas?” He asked, annoyed. Meanwhile, Cas walked to the table and put the plate with the pancakes between the jar of jam, peanut butter, and banana slices.

Gabriel snorted. “Dude, you’re so funny.”

“Shut up,” Dean growled, reaching for the stuff that he had dropped on the door a moment earlier.

“I simply forgot about Felix, Dean. Believe it or not, it wasn’t the most important thing for me yesterday,” Castiel responded, sitting down beside his brother and raising his eyebrow.

Dean was still pissed, so he sat down, took a pancake from a pile, and smeared jam all over it angrily. He had been completely vulnerable the day before, sleeping (among other things), while the snake could literally kill them all at any minute. He took a bite of his pancake. Damn, it was tasty.

“Honestly, I don’t understand why you are behaving like that, Dean. I told you I wanted to bring him here the next time I went to Sweden, didn’t I?” Cas asked. Stupid Castiel and his stupid, completely valid and logical arguments. 

“Yeah, besides, Felix likes to be patted on the head!” Gabe added.

“Shut up, Gabriel,” Cas growled at his brother, maintaining the intense eye contact with Dean.

Jack chose this exact moment to appear back in the room, so Dean took this opportunity to turn his head away from Cas’s gaze. 

“I put him back, but I still want you to meet him. He's part of the family,” the boy stated, reaching for a pancake. Dean swallowed his bite, then looked at the kid, deliberately avoiding his boyfriend’s blue eyes. Jack looked a little sad. Dean hated himself for making him feel that way. He sighed, knowing all too well he was going to regret his next words.

“Alright. I’ll meet the killer snake after breakfast, but no touching will be involved in this whole procedure. And we'll have sushi and a movie night at my place tonight. Do we have a deal?” He asked, reaching for banana slices.

Jack smiled a little, then nodded, sticking a knife into a jar of peanut butter.

“Hey, I wanna go to a movie night, too!” Gabriel interjected with his mouth full of pancake.

“Swallow before you speak,” Cas commented absentmindedly, clearly used to his brother's eating habits.

“Yeah, I mean, you can come,” Dean said, shrugging his shoulders. Gabe was Cas's brother, and even if Dean didn't understand him sometimes, he was still family.

“Sweet!” Gabriel responded, then tried to high-five Jack, but the boy ignored him.

Twenty minutes later, all of them were standing in front of Felix’s terrarium. Dean had refused to meet the snake in Cas’s old sweatpants, so he had insisted on dressing first. The more layers separated him from the venomous beast the better.

He focused on the snake before him. “He kinda looks weird at me.”

“He's a snake, Dean. He doesn't have a facial expression,” Jack informed.

Felix put his tongue out. Yeah, no, the snake was definitely looking weird at him.

“What are the chances that he, like, crawls out of there?” Dean asked, nervously glancing at the boy, who rolled his eyes and looked at his dad, raising his eyebrow. Castiel shrugged. Dean pretended he didn’t see that. They hadn't exchanged a word since breakfast, even while changing clothes in the bedroom moments earlier. Dean could be stubborn too, if he wanted.

“And do what? He’s tiny,” Gabe supplied, because he had obviously come to Jack’s room as well.

“He won’t crawl out unless I take him out. But it’s a corn snake, Dean. He’s harmless,” Jack assured, ignoring his uncle. Dean nodded, then glanced at the animal again. He could swear the snake winked at him. 

No facial expression, my ass, he thought. "Alright, we’ve met. Are you happy?” Dean asked, turning to the boy, who nodded, smiling shyly. “Great. Now, take your backpack, and let’s get going, 'cause you need to be at school in twenty minutes, young man,” Dean said, glancing at Cas’s brother. “And what are you gonna do today, ice-cream guy?”

“I work too, you know?” Gabriel asked, offended, following Dean and Jack to the hallway.

“Yeah? When?” Dean muttered under his breath, leaning down to put on his boots.

“Oh, excuse me, mister ‘I can work when I want and I will hire a guy from Sweden just because he’s got nice abs’,” Gabe grumbled, turning to his brother. “I can’t believe his attitude!”

Castiel hummed. “Sometimes, me neither,” he admitted flatly. Dean rolled his eyes, reaching for his jacket.

“Can I go with Dean, Dad?” Jack asked, tying his shoes. Dean played with his keys, looking anywhere but Cas. He could hear his boyfriend taking a deep breath before responding, “of course,” to his son. 

“Great. Let’s go, then. See you at eight, Gabe,” Dean said, turning around and leaving the apartment, Jack following close behind.

“You promised you won’t fight again,” Jack said with a frown as soon as the door to the Mustang closed behind them. Dean froze in the middle of inserting his keys into the ignition, casting a quick glance at the boy.

“We’re not fighting, Jackie,” he said after a beat, observing as Cas left the house as well, directing his steps to his Lincoln. “It’s just a small misunderstanding,” Dean added, affectionately ruffling the boy's hair.

“So, you're not going to break up?” Jack asked carefully. 

“Nah. You need a lot more than that to break up, bud,” Dean replied, watching Cas pull out of the parking space. “You've got nothing to worry about. C'mon, we should hurry,” he added, starting the engine. 

+

“He’s alive,” Dean said as soon as he spotted a familiar, black hat in the hangar. 

Benny smirked, waving at Dean with some piece of metal. “I’m almost sure you’re the one who infected me in the first place, cher,” he retorted.

“Yeah, fuck you,” Dean chuckled, greeting his friend. “How’re you?”

“Not so great,” Benny admitted. “My wife went to visit her sister in Greece. It's better that way, I guess, since we're still waiting,” he added. Dean knew they had been waiting for the paternity test results for a few days now. The situation with Andrea had been the subject of their discussions for quite a while. Dean tried to support his friend as best as he could since it wasn't an easy time for Benny.

“I heard someone put a hole in your Impala,” Benny said after a beat. 

“Yeah, an inexperienced kid. Right through all her layers, man,” Dean replied, shaking his head.

“Shit. You need some help with that?”

“I might. You've got time during the weekend?”

“Sure thing,” Benny said, then cleared his throat before he spoke again. “So, uh, you and the pretty boy from the racing team, huh? Is it somethin’ serious or Ed is just this stupid?”

Dean smiled. “Yeah, it's serious,” he admitted. 

“Damn,” Benny muttered. “And I thought the guys were smoking pot again.”

Dean chuckled. “Nah. They saw us together in France.”

Benny nodded with a smirk. “And how is it? Any different than dating chicks?”

Dean sighed. The biggest difference was obviously that he loved the stubborn bastard to death, but he had no intention of telling Benny all about his mushy feelings now. They hadn't talked about Cas much - Dean had no heart to brag about his new relationship while Benny's was hanging on a thread.

“Well, I can't lift him, that's for sure,” Dean finally said, making Benny laugh. “I dunno… It's intense. It obviously helps that he's into all this sailing crap,” Dean added. 

“He looks like an intense guy,” Benny replied with a strange expression on his face.

Dean frowned. “What do you mean?”

“He's just a little stiff. I’ve never pictured you with someone surrounded by seriousness and mystery, I guess,” Benny drawled, observing Dean. 

Dean snorted. To call Cas serious was a stretch. “I mean, he's dorky. And cute. And a little bit awkward, sometimes, but it's nothing I can't handle,” he said with a stupid smile that he couldn't quite contain.

“Well, damn,” Benny chuckled. “I would never call your man dorky in his presence, ‘cause I'm pretty sure I'd end up with a broken arm or somethin’, but your face says it all, brother.”

“Come on, he wouldn't harm a fucking fly. He eats plants and watches documentaries about poor turtles, dude,” Dean replied with a grin. The day before he had almost fallen asleep a few times while watching the Great Barrier Reef material, but Cas had kept waking him up just to show him a cool fish on the screen of his laptop. Dean couldn't even get angry at the guy, since Cas had looked so invested and happy the whole time. “Maybe you two should spend some time together. We're having sushi at my place today. You wanna join us?” Dean asked.

“I wouldn't wanna intrude on your date, chief.”

“It's not a date, man. Cas's brother and Jack are gonna be there, too. We wanna watch a movie together.”

“Alright, if you're sure it's okay,” Benny said. “Should I bring somethin’?”

“Nah, we’re good, don’t worry about it. We’re meeting at eight,” Dean replied, then looked around. The hangar seemed a little empty. “Where is everyone, anyway?”

“Half of the crew has got cold, Dean,” Benny chuckled. “C’mon, you actually have to work today, you slacker, or we’re gonna go bankrupt.”

+

Dean blinked at his screen, where an email he received from the clinic a moment earlier was still open. He re-read the message, then blinked again.

He was clean.

And he was going to have a house full of people for an entire evening, including his pissed boyfriend, his kid, and their family. Dean ran a hand across his face. He ended up inviting Charlie and Eileen for a movie night as well (as Dean had found out, it was Sam’s kids-duty day), and Gabriel requested to have a sleepover at Dean’s place.

Dean sighed, then put the phone away, glancing at the gym building through his windshield. Should he even tell Cas? They were technically still not exactly on speaking terms at the moment, except for one text they had exchanged, regarding what hour they should meet at the gym.

He wasn’t even sure why he’d gotten so angry at Cas in the first place. God, he was really killing this whole relationship thing, wasn’t he?

Dean sighed again, then decided to finally step out of his car. There was no point in being miserable in front of the gym when he could totally be as miserable inside, in the company of his justifiably angry boyfriend. He reached for the bag with all his gym stuff that he’d put in the trunk, then directed his steps to the entrance.

Cas was already standing inside, waiting for Dean with a very indifferent expression. He was wearing jeans and a hoodie again, the sneaky bastard.

“Hey,” Dean said, glancing at the keys he was still holding in his hand.

“Hello, Dean,” Cas said back. “I was just wondering if you will join me, or stay in your car instead.” Dean looked up with a scowl. Cas was now smirking. "Shall we?" He asked, raising his eyebrow and walking forward without waiting for an answer. Dean dragged himself behind him with a vague feeling that the next hour would be extremely difficult.

The locker room was quite crowded, so there wasn’t much space on the benches. When Dean entered the room, Cas was already in the middle of undressing, and at least two dudes were trying to discreetly check out his tattoo. Or his ass, Dean couldn’t be sure. His pulse slightly quickened, but he ultimately passed Cas without a word, putting his bag on the next bench with a clenched jaw. Castiel glanced over his shoulder, briefly catching Dean's eye before turning back to his locker. Dean could swear he saw a small smile on his boyfriend's face. 

God, not talking to each other had been a stupid idea, Dean thought as he stripped off his clothes. This whole situation was slowly getting on his nerves, but before he figured out how to bring this topic up with Cas, or start any normal conversation, really, they were both dressed in their gym clothes and Castiel was heading towards the cardio machines. 

“Alright. Let’s start with some warm-up,” he said matter-of-factly, stopping in front of the huge mirror covering almost the whole wall before them. He was wearing red shorts and a black, worn-out tank top with a logo of ‘UBS’ and ‘infonet’ on his back. “Wrists, arms, neck. Come on, Dean,” he said, raising his eyebrow. Dean nodded, then mimicked Cas’s movements, making small circles with his wrists, then swinging his arms. It was definitely too long since he worked out - Dean was all stiff and felt wildly unprepared, moving his joints to the beat of incredibly irritating gym music.

Once they did an unhealthy amount of rolling their shoulders and stretching, Castiel told him to step on the treadmill, then started changing the settings.

“What are you doing?” Dean asked, but Cas only smirked in response, pushing some more buttons. Soon after, the treadmill started to move, and Dean was forced to move with it.

“This should be okay for you,” Cas muttered more to himself than to Dean, then moved to the next treadmill, almost immediately setting a crazy pace.

Dean hated running with all his heart, so his little jog proved to be very tiring. Castiel, however, looked like he was preparing for a 5000-meter run, annihilating the treadmill instead of the other way around. Five minutes in, Dean wanted to die, but he refused to give up before Castiel stopped running, which resulted in him nearly spitting out his lungs. Obviously, his stupid boyfriend in his sexy shorts almost didn’t break a sweat.

Dean was dating a psychopath, that part was clear.

“I think we’re both properly warmed up. Let’s move to the machines,” Cas said some time later, pulling panting Dean behind him further into the gym. He stopped in front of the shoulder press machine, sizing up Dean’s arms. Dean had the weirdest urge to cover them up.

“I’d say 40 will be sufficient, and we’ll move up from there. 10 reps, three sets sound good?” He asked.

“Uh…” Dean replied.

“Sit, Dean,” Cas urged him, setting up the machine. Dean sat down, observing Castiel’s movements. “Alright. Can you lift this?” Cas asked, raising his eyebrow. Dean put his hands on the handles, then pressed up without much difficulty. “Okay, perhaps we could add more weight,” Cas muttered when Dean lowered his hands. “Try again?” He said after a beat.

Dean did, noticing a slight strain in his muscles. It was still manageable though, so he repeated the motion while Cas nodded approvingly. When Dean finished his set, he stood up, making room for Castiel, who adjusted the weight stack, increasing the resistance.

“Listen, I know I acted like a dick in the morning,” Dean said quietly, fixing his eyes at the visible stretch of Cas’s arms.

Cas hummed, but didn’t say anything else, so Dean decided to shut up for now. When Castiel lifted the weight ten times, he stood up and adjusted the weight stack again, motioning Dean to sit back down. Once Dean pressed up, he realized the weight slightly increased. He looked at Cas, who was already watching him closely with a small smirk on his face. With a deep breath, Dean pushed against the load. It wasn’t like he couldn’t handle it; he lifted heavy things in the hangar almost every day. He grunted slightly as he completed the set, feeling the burn in his shoulders. When Cas took his place again, Dean decided to try once more with the whole talking-with-each-other thing.

“Snakes just… freak me out, y'know?” He said, placing his hands on his hips.

“I know,” Cas breathed out, pressing up, then slowly lowered his hands, tensing his jaw muscles. Dean waited for him to say something else, but Castiel finished his set without a word, then stood up and said, “last one and we can move on.”

Okay, so Cas was still pissed and clearly didn’t want to talk. Dean sighed, then sat down, making himself comfortable on the bench. 

“I’m not gonna be able to move tomorrow,” Dean muttered, putting his hands on the handles. 

“You are,” Cas reassured him. “You’re actually pretty strong, Dean. We could try the seated row next.”

“Yeah, let me finish this one first,” Dean grumbled, pressing up. It was even heavier than before. He grimaced, but lifted the weight until his arms were stretched above his head.

“Very good,” Cas murmured, moving closer to offer support. “Nine more.”

Dean nodded, then repeated the movement, ignoring his protesting muscles. On the sixth rep, he felt a bead of sweat traveling down his forehead. On the ninth, he almost didn’t manage to straighten his left arm, but Cas stabilized his elbow with his palm.

“You’re almost there,” he said, quietly encouraging Dean. He was standing very close now, and Dean wanted nothing more than to pull him even closer. He was so desperate for contact by this point that he didn't even care that someone would see them.

“Shit,” Dean muttered, pushing the weight one last time. There was no way he’d be able to lift the damn thing all the way up, he thought before Castiel stepped in again, supporting his trembling arms. 

“Come on, Dean,” he rumbled. 

The intoxicating scent of the ozone and ocean filled Dean’s senses. He looked up.

Cas looked down, slightly opening his plush lips.

Dean took a deep breath, then straightened his arms, completing the set. Cas smiled, but before he could say anything, Dean released the weight and pulled Cas down on his lap, melding their mouths together. Castiel let out a quiet, surprised sound, but quickly melted into the kiss, putting his hands around Dean’s neck. 

It didn’t last long. It couldn’t. Dean knew they were not really supposed to do it in the middle of the crowded gym, so a few moments later he released his hold, pulling away. “I’m sorry,” he muttered, looking at Cas’s impossibly blue eyes.

Cas smiled again, then looked around and stood up, lifting Dean by his hand. “I can't stay angry at you,” he murmured. “And I'm sorry I didn't tell you about the snake sooner,” he added a moment later. “I really forgot about it. You're very distracting.”

Dean grinned. “Yeah?” He asked stupidly.

Cas rolled his eyes, then leaned in, leaving a quick, closed-mouth peck on Dean's lips. “Yes. Now, let me finish my set, and let’s move to another machine. We have to do a lot more before we can go home.”

+

By the time Castiel was satisfied with their workout, Dean almost completely lost his ability to move his arms. He somehow managed to survive the stretching, then dragged himself to the locker room, Cas following close behind with a spring in his steps.

Even though Dean knew he was going to suffer from sore muscles the next day, the training left him with a sense of accomplishment and giddiness. He was also quite horny, and Cas's bare back didn't help with keeping his feelings in check at all . Dean would gladly kiss his boyfriend some more, but sadly, the gym was simply not made for making out. Even the showers offered only partial privacy, with their frosted glass door, revealing the heads and feet of people inside.

Once Dean finished with his shower and sat on the bench, a towel wrapped around his waist, Cas was already pulling up his jeans.

“Do you want to take Lincoln to my place or leave it at yours?” Dean asked, looking for a fresh T-shirt in his bag.

“I’d like to leave it, if that’s okay with you. Do you want to get groceries after?”

“Yeah, I mean, I don't have enough ingredients to make sushi for that many people.”

Cas frowned, turning his head to Dean. “What do you mean?”

Right, he hadn’t told Cas they were having company.

“I invited Eileen, Charlie, and Benny, too. Benny’s kinda in rough shape right now,” Dean informed. Castiel’s face almost didn’t move, which Dean by now knew meant he desperately tried to hide something. “What?” Dean asked, narrowing his eyes.

“Nothing,” Cas replied, avoiding Dean's gaze as he rummaged through his locker. It was a blatant lie, but Dean had very little capacity for any potential argument with his boyfriend, so he decided to let it slide - at least for now. 

They continued to dress, then grabbed their bags and headed towards the exit, holding hands. Dean was the one who initiated it, riding on a wave of workout endorphins, and Cas looked immensely proud of him, shooting him sweet smiles all the way to the parking lot.

“Alright. Meet you in ten in front of your house, sunshine,” Dean said, pulling Cas in for a quick kiss, then directed his steps to the Mustang.

Thinking about what flavors of sushi rolls he would make for the evening, Dean parked in front of Cas's house exactly 12 minutes later. He killed the engine, but before he stepped out of his car, Castiel opened the Mustang’s trunk and tossed his stuff inside, then moved to the passenger door, sliding to the seat next to Dean.

“Gabriel and Jack will join us in a moment, I texted them,” he said, observing Dean’s face with a small grin. He wanted to make out, Dean could tell. It was very fortunate since Dean wanted to do exactly the same and more, but the other stuff would have to wait, at least for now. He grinned back, biting his lower lip. Castiel must’ve lost his patience because the next thing Dean knew, his ass was in the air, hauled by a set of strong arms. He landed on Cas's lap with a mouth occupied by Cas’s lips and his big hands sneaking their way under Dean’s T-shirt. Dean gasped, focusing solely on Castiel's warm touch on his body. With each flick of his tongue, Cas seemed to become more determined to deprive Dean of the ability to think logically, and it clearly worked, because very soon Dean completely lost track of time and space. When Cas moved away a moment later, Dean felt a little lightheaded, and not exactly sure why they had stopped their kissing session.

“They’re coming,” Cas murmured, nodding his head towards his apartment, where Jack and Gabe were trying to lock the door.

Dean sighed, then leaned forward to leave one more, small peck on Cas’s lips before retreating to his seat.

“I’ve got my blood results back today,” he said a beat later, looking down. “I’m clean.”

Cas's eyes slightly widened. “That's great! You see, no chlamydia, after all,” he said with a smile. “The only disturbing part is, we can't do anything about this information until after the movie,” he added, raising his eyebrow.

Dean only managed to wince, before a second later, the door behind him opened. 

“We’re here!” Gabriel said, sitting in the back seat. “Are you two still fighting?” he asked while Jack took a seat behind his dad.

“Nope,” Dean said, starting the engine and fighting with the blush. When he looked at Castiel, he saw his boyfriend already observing him, amused.

“What’s going on?” Jack asked, glancing between Cas and Dean.

“They’re acting weird again,” Gabe muttered.

“We’re not. Everything’s fine,” Dean said, briefly looking at Jack in the mirror, then back at Cas. “Tell them we’re fine.”

“We are,” Cas said with a mischievous glint in his blue eyes, which could mean nothing else than trouble.

+

“Okay, make room, guys!” Dean tried to break through the chatter that was going on in his living room. He proudly carried two trays with the first set of sushi rolls, with Castiel holding another two behind him.

“Whoa!” Jack said with wide eyes.

“It looks amazing, Dean!” Eileen praised, observing the neatly stacked pieces of sushi that Dean had arranged into a nice tower.

“Thanks, sister,” Dean replied, putting the food in front of his guests who were sitting around the TV.

“Damn, Dean-o! Maybe instead of building boats, you should think of running your own restaurant,” Gabriel commented, reaching for chopsticks.

“No! He’d be Dorothy’s competition, and I’d have the biggest dilemma about where to eat my lunches,” Charlie whined. She was without her girlfriend today, who had to stay late at work.

“Don’t be selfish, Red. The world would surely benefit from Dean, the chef,” Benny chuckled.

“As long as I benefit from it, I’m okay with whatever,” Gabe muttered, making room for his brother on the couch. When Cas finally sat down, he pulled out his cute, nerdy glasses and put them on.

“Okay, stop yapping. It’s time for ‘Indiana Jones’ to do the talking here,” Dean said with a smirk, placing himself on the cushion lying on the floor. His couch was too small to fit seven people, so Jack, Charlie, and he decided to sit under it instead. Dean went to the middle, with Cas’s legs right behind him.

“Oh shit, it’s so good,” Charlie said with her mouth full of sushi, while Dean tried to find the movie on his streaming platform.

“He’s a natural. He’d be an incredible housewife,” Gabe chirped, poking Cas in the ribs with his elbow. Castiel rolled his eyes.

“Damn, if only I knew he was so good at it, I would've picked the other brother,” Eileen added, reaching for another piece from the table.

“I'm sorry, but I called dibs,” Cas said in his gravelly voice, making the rest of the crew chuckle and Dean blush furiously.

“And we all envy you, brother. Just wait until he starts baking for you. That's when the true magic happens,” Benny said.

“Stop blabbing or I'll uninvite all of you,” Dean growled, then looked to his right, where Jack was stuffing his mouth with vegan maki. “Except Jackie, of course. We're gonna eat the sushi alone,” he said, patting the boy on the arm. Jack vigorously nodded.

“Really? What did he bake?” Cas asked curiously, completely ignoring Dean’s threats.

“Oh, he once made those little cinnamon rolls, at last year’s company Christmas party, remember?” Charlie asked, looking at Eileen.

“Yeah, along with spice cookies that DJ and Sam couldn’t get enough of,” Eileen said.

“And the pie, of course,” Benny added. “The pecan one tasted like heaven.”

“Alright, that’s enough,” Dean interjected, keenly aware of the fact that at last year’s company Christmas party he had brought Lisa, and wasn’t particularly interested in discussing this subject at the moment. “Just eat the damn sushi and watch the movie.”

Harrison Ford clearly wasn't enough to shut his family up, because despite Dean and Jack's loud protests, the rest of his guests kept joking and commenting throughout the next half an hour. Dean decided they were all hopeless (but nobody brought Lisa’s name into the discussion, at least), and therefore didn't deserve good food, threatening to stop hosting any events involving him cooking in the foreseeable future. This seemed to do the trick because the conversation quieted down, and everyone finally focused on the plot, devouring the remaining sushi.

Some time later, Dean felt Cas gently patting his arm, urging him to make some space. When Dean moved forward, Castiel got off the couch and positioned himself behind him, pulling Dean’s back to his chest. Soon after that, Jack scooted over, and Cas put his arm around the boy, hugging him to his side.

Dean felt pleasantly warm, tucked in Castiel’s protective arms and tightly wrapped in his comforting scent. He could hear his boyfriend’s deep, steady breaths, accompanied by Jack’s soft giggles that erupted every few moments in response to whatever happened on the screen.

I belong here, Dean suddenly thought, thoroughly surprising himself.

His earliest experiences of being a part of a family were filled mainly with sadness, anger, and the constant noise of arguments or cold, quiet mocking. There had been almost nothing warm or bright between Dean’s parents, leaving him with the vague idea that this was just what relationships were like.

Hollow. Lonely. Devoid of love.

He had always had his brother, of course, but Dean very soon discovered that family didn’t end with blood. As more people came into his life, surrounding him with affection, care, and support, Dean found out that love had many shapes and colors. But God knew, he had craved something more, even though he hadn’t known what this ‘more’ should even look like. 

Over the years, he had observed his friends and family, trying to understand the key to happy, long-lasting relationships. Some succeeded, while others did not, but it seemed that there was indeed a way to have it all.

So, it was very much possible, just not for Dean Winchester, who hadn't really liked himself and knew only how to run.

And then, he'd met a guy with a huge wing tattoo on his back and his extraordinary kid, who made him realize what exactly he had been missing.

Who made him finally feel at home.

“Are you okay?” Cas whispered into Dean’s ear. Dean could have sworn the dude had a sensor of Dean’s mood swings installed in his ass.

“Yeah,” Dean whispered back, craning his neck to see Cas’s face. Castiel hummed, then leaned in, leaving a closed-mouth kiss on Dean’s lips and pulling him a little closer to his chest.

“Awww…” Dean could hear from the left side of the couch. He discreetly flipped off Benny, so Jack wouldn't notice, causing both Eileen and Charlie to giggle. When he focused back on the screen in front of him, Dean was smiling.

+

“Thanks for stopping by, man,” Dean said to Benny, hugging him goodbye.

“Thanks for inviting me. It sure did me good,” Benny replied, patting Dean on the back before turning to Cas. “I’m happy we finally managed to talk for a bit, chief. This race stuff you told me about sounds fascinating. It wouldn’t hurt if we grabbed a beer or two once in a while,” Benny said with a small grin, shaking Cas’s hand.

“It definitely wouldn’t,” Cas replied, smiling back. “It was great to see you, Benny,” he added politely, slipping his free hand from Dean’s waist to the back pocket of his jeans and discreetly squeezing Dean’s ass. Dean swallowed, trying to stop the blush forming on his neck.

“You too. Have a nice rest of the evening, guys,” Benny said, turning around.

“Thanks, bye!” Dean replied, then narrowed his eyes at Cas when the door shut after his friend. “What are you doing?” he whispered.

“Getting impatient,” Cas whispered back, making Dean blush even more. Charlie obviously chose this exact moment to appear next to them. 

“Winchester, you look like a tomato,” she commented with a knowing smile, then turned to Cas. “What did you do to him?”

“Nothing yet,” Castiel replied smugly. Charlie snorted. Dean groaned. 

“What’s going on?” Eileen asked, walking towards them.

“Christ,” Dean muttered. “Nothing. Cas is just being his usual self. Did you girls have fun?” He asked, glancing between Charlie and Eileen. 

“God, yes! We need to do this more often,” Eileen said, smiling at Charlie. “I almost forgot how nice it could be to watch a movie without kids running around.”

“Remember, if you ever wanna rest, I’m always down for some wine and gossip,” Charlie replied, then looked back at Cas. “Cute glasses, by the way,” she said, while Eileen nodded enthusiastically.

Cas smiled shyly, adjusting said glasses on his nose. “Thank you. Dean helped with picking them up.”

“Did he?” Eileen asked, smiling even wider, while Charlie snorted beside them.

“Alright, go away already,” Dean said, shooing them in the direction of his door.

“Gee, okay,” Charlie chuckled. “See you guys tomorrow?”

“Of course,” Cas said, leaning to hug both girls and stepping aside to give Dean room. 

“Say bye to Jack from us,” Eileen said, then she and Charlie waved their goodbye before heading out the door.

"Castiel Novak, not every member of my family needs to know that we're about to have sex," Dean said in a hushed tone. “And don’t squeeze my ass when I’m talking to people.”

Cas tilted his head. “You liked it,” he said, raising his eyebrow. “But I’ll try to refrain from such activities in the future,” he added, nuzzling Dean’s neck

“Did you have fun today?” Dean asked, ignoring the extremely pleasant feeling of Cas’s stubble grazing the sensitive skin.

“I’m trying to, but you keep interrupting me,” Cas replied, smoothly switching to little licks and kisses, making Dean's knees go weak.

He swallowed back a gasp. “Cas, your brother is still in the bathroom. I need to get some bedding for him,” he murmured, closing his eyes. 

Cas sighed, then moved away again. “Alright. I’ll help you, it’s going to be faster this way,” he said, pulling Dean in the direction of the living room.

They worked together, cleaning the space and preparing Dean’s couch for Gabe to sleep on. When they were spreading the bed sheet, Dean glanced at his boyfriend.

“So uh, you enjoyed Benny's company?” He asked carefully.

Cas smirked. “I did.”

“Awesome,” Dean said with a small smile. “I mean, he's okay, right?”

Cas hummed, smirking even wider. “He is,” he admitted, stuffing the pillow into the pillowcase. “You seem very interested in me liking him.”

Dean shrugged. “I dunno. He's my friend, and there kinda was a tension between you two. I thought it would go away if you talked with each other.”

“Alright. Benny seems to be a good man. I wouldn't mind going for a beer with him. Or team up for a race, for that matter,” Castiel admitted tossing the pillow on the bed.

“Why uh… why didn't you like him earlier?” Dean asked, spreading the duvet.

Cas observed Dean for a moment before he finally spoke again. “He finds you attractive,” he admitted.

“How do you know that?” Dean asked with a frown.

Cas rolled his eyes. “It’s not exactly hard to tell.”

“Huh,” Dean mused. “I mean, I didn’t know until he kinda hit on me. But he was very drunk that day,” he said, glancing at his boyfriend. “I'm not great at reading the signs when it comes to dudes. No idea if they're interested or not.”

Cas hummed again, moving closer with a glint in his eyes. “Just so you know, I'm very interested.”

“Yeah, now I know that, but I was trying to figure you out for months,” Dean retorted, putting his hands on Cas’s waist with a small smile.

“All you had to do was ask,” Castiel said, gravitating back towards Dean’s neck. When he gently bit the skin, Dean concealed a moan, putting his hand on Cas’s nape and tangling his fingers in the short hair. “Do you think we can stop talking now?” Cas murmured, pulling Dean’s ass closer to himself. 

“Uh-huh,” Dean breathed out, guiding Castiel’s mouth to his lips and quickly forgetting what they were even talking about.

“Dean,” Cas rumbled a moment later between the heated kisses. “Let’s go upstairs.” He sounded out of breath, much to Dean's delight. “Gabriel is going to whine if he sees us like that,” he added, pulling himself away. Dean absolutely loved seeing him this disheveled. 

“Yeah, okay,” he replied, then let himself be dragged up the stairs, happily ogling Cas’s ass from below.

A moment later, just as they were passing beside the bathroom, Gabriel opened the door, emerging from inside in sweatpants and a T-shirt. “You have a really nice shower, Dean-o, I have to give you that,” he commented with a grin.

“Thanks,” Dean replied. “The bed downstairs is ready.”

“Nice. Jack's asleep, I assume?”

Cas nodded. The kid had drifted off on Cas's shoulder during the movie, but they had managed to wake him and transport him to the guest room. He had fallen  asleep almost instantly after his head had hit the pillow.

“You two lovebirds have a good night,” Gabe said, wiggling his brows.

“Just go to sleep,” Cas said flatly, watching as his brother finally directed his steps to the living room, whistling under his breath. Once he disappeared downstairs, Cas glanced back at Dean. “I have an idea,” he said, then gently pushed his boyfriend into the bathroom. When he locked them inside and took off his glasses, putting them on the washing machine, he immediately reached for the buttons of Dean's flannel shirt to undo them. “Show me how you imagined us naked, under the shower, Dean,” he said, then slid the piece of clothing off Dean’s shoulders, biting his lips.

Dean grinned, feeling a rush of arousal flooding his veins. He couldn’t move any faster, peeling off Cas’s pants, shirt, and underwear, while Castiel, for his part, tried to strip Dean. Taking off each other's clothes became a bit tricky when both of them wanted to do it at the same time, but once they finally managed to get rid of all the layers separating them, Dean wasted no time. He dove right between Cas's lips, trying to pull him into the shower without breaking the kiss - which he somehow accomplished with a few clumsy maneuvers. He blindly reached to turn on the water, then moved them both under the stream, sliding his fingers across Castiel’s wet, toned chest.

“Damn, Cas,” he murmured when he slightly pulled away to get some air and found himself completely captivated by the droplets running down Cas's skin instead.

Dean had imagined this moment probably one too many times already, but absolutely nothing compared to the real deal. And it wasn't about Cas's perfect body - which was just that - flawless and captivating. It wasn’t even about all the sensations that reached Dean's overheated brain, making his pulse race and his mouth water.

It was about those damn, blue eyes that kept watching Dean with a tender, most vulnerable gaze existing. 

Here they were, naked, all over themselves under the hot shower, stupidly horny and painfully hard, but Castiel managed to look at Dean like he didn’t want to turn his eyes away ever again. 

Dean reached up, cupping Cas’s face as if it were the most precious object in the entire world, then closed the distance between them one more time, basking in the sensation of falling for his best friend even further. 

He went for slow and sweet this time, gradually heating up the kiss and swirling his tongue inside Castiel’s mouth. When a moment later soft moans started escaping from Cas’s throat, Dean pushed him gently, leaning his back against a tiled, gray wall. Cas went willingly, drawing Dean along with him and pressing their cocks together. The skin-to-skin contact knocked the air out of Dean's lungs in the most pleasurable way. He groaned, then followed his instinct and thrust his hips, causing their lengths to rub against each other again. The action brought a loud moan out of Cas, and Dean really hoped it would be drowned out by the sound of running water. When he repeated the motion, Castiel decided to move his hips as well, which in Dean’s opinion turned out to be an incredible idea - their dicks grinding against each other was quickly making its way up the list of 'Dean's Top 10 Things In The World'. He cursed, breaking the kiss, then looked down. Even though he was not small by all means, Cas’s cock was still a tad bigger, now swollen and glistening with precum. 

“Dean,” Cas breathed out, getting his attention back. Dean swallowed, then looked up at his flushed boyfriend. “Give me your hand,” Castiel murmured, then guided Dean’s raised palm to their dicks, wrapping their fingers tightly around the shafts. Dean whimpered, but before he got a chance to do anything else, Cas used his free hand and pulled on Dean's neck, bringing their mouths together. It seemed that Castiel was also done with a slow pace, because before he knew it, Dean’s back was pressed against the tiles and Cas started pumping their joined cocks at a steady rhythm, kissing Dean feverishly. Dean couldn't be more grateful for the additional support, as he was starting to feel dizzy from too much excitement and too little oxygen ratio. It wasn't long before his muscles tensed and a familiar need for more friction took over his brain. He freed his thumb from Cas's hold, then smeared the precum on the tips, adding some twist motion as they slid their fists down. It felt insanely good, and Castiel must've felt the same, judging by the groan he let out into Dean's mouth. 

It took only a few more pumps for Dean to choke out a small, helpless sound and start cumming all over their cocks, feeling absolutely blissful. Without slowing down the movement of his hand, Cas slightly pulled away and watched intensely as Dean, with his mouth open and head leaning against the wall behind him, fell apart in Cas’s arms. The sight clearly sent him over the edge too, because soon after Dean heard a sweet, muffled moan and felt another wave of hot cum spreading across his length. 

As Dean's brain function slowly came back to him and he opened his eyes a moment later, he saw Cas leaning his head slightly forward, trying to catch his breath. Dean released the grip on their dicks and put his hands on Cas’s back, pulling his dazed boyfriend closer to his chest. Castiel seemed a little out of it, so Dean gently moved them under the stream of water.

“Are you okay?” He asked, a bit worried by Cas’s silence.

Cas smiled and hummed in response, leaning his forehead on Dean’s shoulder and putting his hands loosely on Dean’s hips. Dean grinned, then reached for a body lotion to wash them both. Once he started stroking Cas’s skin with his fingers, creating fragranced foam as a result, Castiel purred pleasantly into Dean’s neck. Dean pressed a little harder on the muscles along Cas’s spine, bringing his lips to Cas’s jaw and leaving a trail of little kisses there. Castiel, with his eyes still closed, slightly tilted his head, allowing Dean’s tongue to move down his neck and right to Cas’s collarbone. Dean nibbled at the sensitive skin before he moved his hands to Cas’s chest and started washing it thoroughly. Then, he proceeded to wash the rest of Castiel, including his spent cock. He wasn’t sure if he should go any further, but before he withdrew his hand, Cas slurred, “please keep going,” into Dean’s skin. 

“Alright, Angel,” Dean murmured, then kissed Cas’s cheek and cupped his boyfriend’s testicles between his fingers, washing them gently. Cas let out a sigh of pleasure, eliciting a warm feeling flooding Dean's chest. Being this close and tender without the intention of having sex right after was somewhat of a new concept for Dean, but intimacy seemed to flow between them quite effortlessly. Their bodies melded together perfectly, as if both of them were constantly craving each other’s warmth and touch. It was the easiest thing in the whole world for Dean to just surrender to it.

He gently squeezed and rubbed Cas’s balls before slowly moving his hand even further down, massaging the smooth patch of skin behind the testicles. When he was getting close to the hole, Cas gasped softly and his dick, pressed against Dean’s groin, slightly twitched.

“Still okay, sweetheart?” Dean whispered into Cas’s ear, earning a nod and an affirming hum in return. Castiel was almost melting in his arms by this point, leaning on Dean with his entire torso, but Dean didn’t really mind. He circled his finger around Cas’s asshole a few times, feeling Cas’s shaky breaths on his neck. Since his intention wasn’t to rile his boyfriend up again, Dean only brushed his fingers against the hole, then moved his hand to Cas's butt, cupping it with both hands.

“There, all clean,” he murmured. Cas hummed again, still hiding his face in Dean’s neck. Dean smiled. “Let me wash myself real quick and we can go to sleep,” he added, grasping Cas’s chin. Castiel opened one, tired, blue eye and pouted, causing Dean to chuckle softly. “I need thirty seconds,” he said, then put a small kiss on Cas’s lips, slightly moving away to wash his junk and rinse all the foam they had created.

Once they got out of the shower, Cas seemed to awaken slightly, and they both somehow managed to prepare for sleep. Dean then guided Cas to the bed, settling him next to himself under the covers. Castiel closed his eyes almost immediately, burrowing under the blanket until only the top of his head was exposed. Dean chuckled, then plugged both of their phones into charge before he found himself pulled to Cas’s chest and trapped between his limbs.

Wrapped like a burrito, warm under the comforting weight of Cas's thigh and arm, Dean felt sated, safe, and exactly where he was supposed to be.

+

Castiel wasn’t sure what had woken him up from a peaceful slumber. He slowly opened his eyes and blinked, realizing that it was still dark outside. He could feel Dean’s warm body pressed to his side and his steady, deep breaths filling the surrounding silence. 

Suddenly, the door to the bedroom opened and Cas could hear Jack’s footsteps getting closer. The boy was slightly sniffling.

“Jack?” Castiel rasped out, squinting his eyes and lifting himself up. “What happened?”

“I had a nightmare,” Jack whispered in Swedish, stopping beside the mattress.

Jack never switched to Swedish unless he was very afraid or very angry, so Castiel knew the matter was quite serious.

“Alright, I’ll go with you to the guest room, then,” Castiel whispered back in Swedish, but before he could stand up, Jack spoke again, “no, I want to sleep here. I’m scared to go there.”

Castiel sighed. Jack had been doing very well lately, to the point where Cas had thought that the fear of the darkness had disappeared. Clearly, that was not the case. 

“Okay. Come on, then,” Castiel said, making room for Jack on the spacious bed. Luckily, Dean’s mattress was massive and they could all fit without the need to squeeze uncomfortably. Jack lay down on the bed to Cas’s left, pressing his cold feet to Cas’s shins. Cas winced, but endured it. “Why are you so cold?” He asked quietly, tucking the duvet tightly around the boy. “We moved to Portugal and you still managed to almost freeze off your feet,” he added with a soft smile, then kissed the boy's forehead. “Go to sleep, Jack. You're safe here.”

Once the boy nodded and closed his eyes, Cas glanced to his right, then gently pushed on Dean’s back, hoping that his boyfriend would move a little without the need to wake him. Dean grumbled something in his sleep, shifting closer to the edge of the mattress and creating a space for Cas to lie down. Castiel readjusted the pillow, but as soon as his head touched it and he closed his eyes, Jack whispered again.

“Daddy?”

“Hmm?” Cas replied tiredly, rolling to his side.

“Why did you and Dean fight?”

Cas sighed again. Never in his life would he have imagined that this would become a topic of discussion with his child in the middle of the night. On the other hand, Castiel's choices were greatly affecting Jack, and since the boy absolutely adored Dean, it wasn't exactly surprising that he was worried.

“Sometimes adults are stubborn,” Castiel finally whispered back. “And when they are in a relationship, they have some misunderstandings. It just happens, and when it does, you should talk about it. Dean and I still have to learn how to properly communicate with each other,” he added.

“So, did you talk?” 

“Yes. Don't worry about it and please, go to sleep now. You'll need your rest for tomorrow,” Castiel quietly said, hoping it would be enough information to satisfy Jack's worries. 

“But what if you argue again and won't talk about it? Is it possible that you will break up?” Jack asked after a brief pause. 

Castiel opened his eyes again. He knew that arguments were completely normal in a relationship, according to a book he had read at least. It was certainly possible for Dean and him to have differing opinions and argue, but the idea of breaking up over something like that seemed surreal. Even though, judging by Jack's concerns, Castiel should make sure they wouldn't argue in front of the boy again.

When he had decided to start being with Dean, Cas had known that Jack would be a part of this, too. It was incredibly selfish of him to be romantically involved with anyone, but Castiel had decided to take that risk nevertheless. If the time they had spent apart after his birthday party had taught him anything, it was that he didn't want to be away from Dean anymore. Every cell of his being had been screaming at him to make things right and get Dean back, setting aside all of Castiel's pride and stubbornness.

Now, all he could do was hope that his decisions wouldn't backfire and cause harm to both himself and Jack.

“I can't promise you we won't fight again, but I can assure you we will do everything in our power to not break up with each other. Dean is my best friend, too, and we are very happy together, Jack. We both want to make it work,” Castiel slowly replied.

Suddenly, he felt said best friend stirring behind him.

“What is going on?” Dean asked groggily, rolling to his side.

“I was scared to sleep alone, so I came here,” Jack whispered from Cas's left, switching back to English.

“Jackie?” Dean whispered back. “Okay, that makes sense,” he added, moving his chest closer to Cas's back and blindly patting the bed between Castiel and Jack. “Gimme your hand and go to sleep, kid. We're gonna protect you from whatever crawls out from under the bed,” he said, then took Jack's palm in his, putting their joined hands on Cas's side. “C'mon, close your eyes and count some fluffy sheep in your head.”

“Okay,” Jack whispered back and finally stopped talking. Castiel was thoroughly impressed.

“You too, Angel. Stop thinking. Sleep now,” Dean quietly ordered, then put a kiss on Castiel's neck, hugging him closer.

And just like that, in less than 30 seconds, Dean managed to placate both Castiel and Jack, taking their worries away from them. It wasn't the first time he had done this, either. Dean was an incredible caregiver, always making sure that people important to him were well-fed and happy. Being included in this group felt like a rare privilege and definitely not something everyone got to enjoy.

Cas smiled, focusing on Dean’s steady heartbeat pulsing beneath his chest, currently plastered to Cas’s back. Very soon, he drifted back to sleep.

+

Dean opened one eye, then the other. He found himself lying on his side, already feeling the pain that had built up in his shoulders overnight. Wincing, he rolled onto his back. He tried to stretch but regretted it the moment he raised his hands. Even his ass was hurting.

“Dean?” He heard a whisper somewhere to his left, from behind sleeping soundly Castiel.

“Yeah?” Dean whispered back, remembering that Jack had appeared there in the middle of the night.

“I’m hungry,” the boy declared quietly. Dean smiled, then glanced at his watch. Growing teenagers always seemed to have insatiable appetites. He remembered how Sammy had eaten an entire large pizza by himself at that age and still been hungry.