Archive of Our Own ^beta

Anaheim, 2008.

The phone rings. Once, twice. Cove picks up. Almost instantly Anthony's voice comes through, going "Hey, guess what? Some guy just came up to me and started badmouthing you to my face!" He says, sounding in disbelief. "I don't stand for that, you know that, I told him off."

Cove smiles. "Did you beat him up for me?"

"Of course. I kicked his fucking ass. It felt good," Cove can hear Anthony smiling, as well, through his voice. "Oh, hey, man, I'm coming around Chain Reaction for a couple shows real soon, next week. You're around, right? You think you could make it to one of them?"

Cove doesn't even have to think about it. "Of course, I'm there. Excited to see you play."

"Nononono hey, do you like want to do a song with me or something? People will go fucking crazy. I want to play with you," Anthony says, pretty much cutting him off.

"Yeah, what, like Seven Years?"

"No, I fucking hate playing that song," A pause. "Sorry."

Cove snorts.

"Come out with me for Dear Child, man! During the encore, it'll rock."

Cove doesn't have to think about this either. "I'm there. I'm there."

Someone screams a loud "What the fuck!?" from the crowd, catching Anthony's attention. Exactly. He turns to Cove and says just that, "Yeah, what the fuck." Cove throws a huge grin his way. Anthony introduces the song as it starts.

There is energy buzzing through the entire place, the crowd loves it, they always go crazy for Dear Child, but it is even more so tonight. No wonder. Anthony keeps looking at Cove through out the entire song, and getting up in his space, touching him. Cove's not exactly keeping his hands off either, this is an exciting moment for the both of them. Cove almost can't believe it, and really, neither can Anthony.

The song eventually has to come to an end, signaling the end of what was an incredible show. Anthony leans back into Cove as the song ends, just after singing the last note, and Cove wraps an arm around him. Anthony turns to dive into a hug, squeezing him tight. He feels his friend wrap his arms around his shoulders, tucking his head in. Fuck, Anthony is on a high right now.

Anthony calls a goodnight out to the audience, and how they get offstage can only be described as running. Anthony hooks his arm back around Cove, and Cove hasn't even let go of him fully yet. He doesn't really plan to, it's good to be this close to Anthony. Anthony brings Cove in for another, more proper hug. Anthony starts to speak, a bit muffled into the other's shoulder, praising him, telling him he was great out there, thanking him for coming out.

"That was incredible, Anthony. Thank you for letting this happen," Cove says, picking his head up from where it was rested on Anthony's shoulder.

"Of course, of course. It was fucking awesome. You're just awesome, man," Anthony says as he pulls away, keeping his hands on Cove's waist. There's a silence then, not uncomfortable, but not exactly comfortable either. Tense, but not too much, not so much a bad tension. Oh, Anthony's definitely about to kiss him, eyes flickering down to somewhere just beneath his eyes. A bit different from the spontaneous kisses he usually gives friends, instead he's waiting for some kind of sign or permission.

And Cove panics a bit, kind of flails, more emotionally than physically, and pulls out of Anthony's hold entirely. Anthony just breathes a laugh out, and lets it go. His bad.

San Diego, 2014

"Somebody's got lasers?" Cove hears Anthony say, up on that stage so far away from him in the middle of the crowd, as he feels a bit of fear, and a bit of excitement, run through him as he locks eyes with Chris.

This is Cove's first time catching a Saosin show ever, made even weirder by the obvious fact that he's the former frontman. He never got to see the Saosin he was a fan of back then, never got to enjoy it live in person as a fan, despite being close to the area they would normally play at the time. After all these years, it's already up to be an incredible experience, one making Cove emotional, he thought this might never happen.

You can see how excited everyone is to be back on stage after a long break, and for Anthony, a very long break. They just finished their first song, the electric Seven Years, and Anthony and Chris started banter with the audience.

Maybe he spotted him earlier, or someone else did, Cove wouldn't know, as his focus was mainly on Anthony, he's already way familiar with how everyone else on stage performs in this band, and Anthony is downright captivating. The way he performs and can hold and control an audience is something to admire. Not to mention his voice is incredible; that's his friend and his hero. So, sue him for not noticing, or something.

"Hey, for real though, we accomplished a lot with another singer, and he's from San Diego," Chris starts, and people start bringing attention Cove's way. Pointing and cheering, screaming. He goes with it. He's excited. The crowd is pushing him and carrying him towards the stage, to his friends. He can't remember the last time he saw any of these guys in person, maybe since he got kicked out, really. He'll see his friends again. He'll see Anthony, who's currently chanting his name.

Anthony grabs onto him as Cove also goes in for a hug, and Cove warps around him tight, filled with the most emotion he's felt in a while, overcome completely with it. Anthony pulls back and says something to him, not letting go at all yet, and Cove doesn't even hear it, distracted and ears filled up by the crowd. Cove grips Anthony's sides hard, pretty much digging his fingers in as they go back in. He doesn't want to let go, feels like his face might fall off with how hard he's smiling, feels like if he does let go he'll start crying, something.

Eventually Cove thinks he needs to leave, and after what felt like forever but at the same time way too little time, he pulls away to hug the rest of the band. Anthony watches him go around to everyone, Cove letting go of everyone as quickly as they started, and before Cove knows it, the moment is all over and he's walking off stage, ready to go back into the crowd to just be a fan.

He can feel eyes boring into him as he leaves, and as he turns to bow to the audience, he can see Anthony staring right at him. Cove continues his way off stage, turning back and walking away, still feeling those same two blue eyes on him. None of them see him for the rest of the night.

Pomona, 2018

Anthony is buzzing. Buzzing. The last time he played with Cove was an entire ten years ago, it's been too long since he's performed with his friend, but him and the rest of his band, and Cove, of course, have a special plan for tonight.

Saosin is doing a couple special holiday shows with Cove's band, Dead American, of course they have to keep friends close, and Night Verses; of course, in no other place but California. Tonight's the first night, and since the shows were announced rumors have been going around about if Cove would come out with Saosin for a song of his, and tonight they might just be proven right.

Anthony didn't have a clue of what role he was supposed to play, not wanting to perform a song that wasn't his, but he really felt like he should be out there. He resolved to be involved in some kind of way, and Chris offered up to teach him the bass to a song right before they went on, not like they had any time, but Anthony took the opportunity immediately anyway. What, like it's hard?

So, Anthony's buzzing. Getting to play with Cove sounds like a dream.

The beginning notes of You're Not Alone start, Anthony playing along on Chris's bass, sweaty as the band nears the end of the set, with Chris telling Anthony how to play the song right there and then. Cove's facing the audience, soaking in the excitement and joy of the crowd.

Cove is, obviously, nervous, but just after a minute of being on that stage, he feels more comfortable singing songs with this band, performing for a crowd that wants to hear him, everyone is so excited. He walks around the stage, pretty much letting the crowd sing the entire song, he gets a bit emotional hearing it.

All too suddenly, the song is over, and the first of two shows is coming to an end. There's only one thing left. Anthony walks up to him, getting in his space and hugging him, and asks him if he wants to sing Seven Years together with him, as if that wasn't what was planned. "I always felt like I need help singing this song, it's always hard to do it alone."

The crowd is cheering loudly, and Cove feels like he could jump out of his skin. "Let's do it together, I love you," Anthony says, and everyone gets ready to start the song.

"Before we play this," Anthony says, about to give a short, but important, message to the crowd. "I just want to say, it's such an honor to me to share a band, and to share all of these songs with him." Anthony points in Cove's direction. "I'm so honored to be here," Anthony says as he turns to his friend and fellow vocalist. "I love you very much."

Cove tries to give a soft smile, but it grows in a way that is out of his control. "I fucking love you, man. I love what you did. This is-" Cove starts. "This is what made me fall in love with Saosin." He then also points at Anthony, just how he did at him moments earlier. Anthony says to go ahead, then the song is starting. The crowd may be even more excited for this than they were for You're Not Alone.

Towards the end of the song, after their exciting and clearly heartful performance together, Anthony goes down towards the crowd, and Cove jumps in. Anthony goes in not too long after. Cove tries to find Anthony in the crowd and holds on to him, wanting to never let go. He gets a bit lost in the feeling of it all, of being with this crowd that's been excited to see him, of playing with his friends again.

Before he knows it, he's being dragged out of the pit, song over, and he's still reaching out for Anthony. He doesn't follow.

Cove greets some fans, and walks away, then Anthony eventually is pushed towards the exit by the crowd, and he falls out, his job done. He's now down a shoe as he walks, kind of jogs, actually, off to go find Cove.

He finds him and slaps him on the back and compliments him, he's fuckin' awesome. "It's such an honor to perform with you, really." His voice goes soft at the end, and he's being very sincere, and he's looking at him way too deeply, and Cove is cheesing a huge smile at him, goes to hug him. Cove realizes as he goes in that Anthony was probably, definitely, about to kiss him. Oh, still this...

Anthony hugs back and grips tight and Cove grips his shoulders back, he's already hugged the rest of the band. Anthony pulls back first, thinking that Cove is still not interested in him, and is never going to be, so he doesn't bother with trying to kiss him this time, just as Cove tries to lean in. Anthony doesn't seem to notice, and Cove laughs at it, full of emotion, confusion. He doesn't say anything, and Anthony doesn't question it.

Garden Grove, 2022.

Anthony's smoothing down the front of his skirt, even though there's no smoothing to be done. It's a wrinkled up cheap costume he took out of the bag straight onto his body, nothing he can do. He's excited for the show tonight, though not much else. He's been busy. Extremely busy, and he's only going to get busier, with tours, new music.... None of it feels like its in his control anymore, anyway.

When he gets on stage he's great, though, he wants nothing more than to connect with the audience, and to deliver them a worthwhile show. To see people's faces as they smile and dance and sing their hearts out to his music, his songs.

He can hear Dead American playing their opening set, though muffled. The last time he saw Cove before this tour was over a year ago, he hasn't even talked to him since then, really not even now. He doesn't know why he feels so weird around him these days. He's thought about it, but any possibility is shut down pretty quickly, no, that's not it.

Dead American's set has ended. He barely noticed, with how deep in thought he was. People come whirling past him and that's when he realizes. He watches everyone, is he really the only one that dressed up? He saw a bit of the crowd, at least they participated. Really, it was only his idea, and on such short notice.

He walks back to the dressing room, still kind of in his own mind. On his way there he bumps into Cove, and he apologizes and immediately rushes away. Some of the only words he's said to him all tour. He goes back to wait and prepare for the show with the rest of his band.

On his way walking over to the stage stairs, he sees Cove waiting to watch the show from the side. He waves at him. "Hey, man," He says, a pause, then a smile. "Hey. I like your costume. Stranger Things, right?"

Anthony relaxes a bit, feeling less tense from seeing Cove not taking it too hard from him being weird to him, and from the show just a couple minutes away. "Oh, shit, is that what this is... I just wanted to dress up as a cheerleader. I didn't even realize."

Cove laughs and takes a step towards him, they're a bit close now... Anthony looks at him and starts to blurt out an apology for not really talking to him or even seeing him this whole time. "I'm not trying to avoid you, life's been busy, and I-" and Cove puts a hand on his arm, making him stop what turned into a ramble.

Cove says, "It's okay, I can tell, I see." he drags his hand to his shoulder and shakes him lightly in a comforting gesture. Anthony stares at him. He better get going now, the show is starting. Anthony mutters thanks to him and hurries off to the stairs with the rest of his band.

During the show, though his focus is on the performance, he keeps Cove in his mind, he actually can't leave now that he's seen him. Anthony gets picked up again from performing. He feels great, there's not any better thing in the world to him than the audience there getting what they need and giving all that energy back to Anthony.

He comes off stage after the show is over and hugs everyone briefly, Anthony having a goal in mind, he's got an adrenaline rush from the show, trying not to overthink things like he's been doing lately, it's unlike him. Anthony walks over to Cove, who's still just side stage, watching the whole thing, and just fucking kisses him.

It's been too long of a wait. He knows he can, now. So he goes for it. And it's great. They pull apart after just their brief, but hard kiss. "Fucking.. finally," Cove breathes.

Anthony says, "Yeah, god. Finally," He pauses. "Fuck I'm sorry that I've been so weird, man."

Cove cuts him off. "No, no, hey, It's okay. I do understand, it's a lot going on, yeah. Yeah." Anthony looks up at him as they both pause. They kiss again, and it's a lot sweeter this time. They never want to let go of each other.

Philadelphia, 2004.

As Cove's getting off stage from one of the first sets of the tour, the first tour he's done with this band since he got in, he feels so many eyes on him. It makes him more nervous than he already was. The crowd is boring into his back. He thinks he did okay, if it was anything but Saosin, that is, and he isn't sure if hes living up to the band, to these songs, to what magic Anthony had created. He's too nervous to hang around for the main act, He's already seen them this tour anyways.

As he's walking out the door to get some fresh air, he still can't shake the feeling of someone watching him. He goes to rest against the wall of the building, surprisingly alone, and just as he has some time to himself, he hears the door open again. He opens his eyes that he didn't even realize he squeezed shut, and turns to see- Oh, no fricking way. No way is that Anthony Green walking towards him and coming to stand beside him.

"Hey, man. Glad I finally got to see you, I've been waiting for this!" Oh, man, did Anthony come to see him? No, who is he kidding, the band probably invited him, It's a Philly show.

Cove laughs, awkwardly, kind of comes out more like a cough, says, "Oh, really?" He doesn't know what else to say.

Anthony says, "Yeah, man! I got to hear some of your demo you sent in over a very angry phone call to me," He laughs. "I knew they were gonna pick you, even if I could barely hear you, I could tell. You got something." Anthony turns and looks directly at him. "See, I was right. You do got something, you're really good, Cove. Even better live than I could have thought."

They sit in silence for a moment, Cove unsure of how to respond, thinking he's definitely drunk, then Anthony suddenly starts. "Oh! I didn't introduce myself, i just assumed-"

"No, no I know you, you're Anthony green! Of course I know you," Cove says, nervously. He doesn't know how he's coming off and he doesn't really want to come off as anything at all. Anthony smiles.

A short time passes a bit and they get to really talking, Anthony praising him, and Cove relaxes, starts to talk about how he's actually insecure about being the new singer. He thinks he doesn't live up to that EP, that those aren't his songs to sing, it's not his place in his eyes, and to everyone else too, probably.

Anthony grabs his arm and runs his hand up to his shoulder, resting it there. "No, man. These songs are meant to be sung by you. You're here for a reason." And Cove's mind blanks out.

What is going on. Did he just say that to me. Does he mean that.

"You're just saying that..." Cove huffs a laugh.

"I'm not. I'm not. I'm not just saying any of this. You're talented, you're special... Listen." He's clearly drunk... "I came out here to see you because I believe in what you've got. And I was proven so right. This band fucking hates my guts right now but it was so worth it to see you." He pauses to breathe. "You killed it, and you were picked for a reason, you're good, goddamn!"

Someone's calling Cove back in, and he has to go, so he goes. He looks back and shouts a hurried "Thank you!" but he doesn't know if Anthony even heard him.