Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Thomas, Newt, Minho and Gally were all sitting around a nearly unlit fire everyone else had called it a night, but they didn't take too much notice continuing their conversation about various things, Thomas was joining in on the occasion, but the conversation mainly consisted of Gally and Minho's voice, raised tones occurring every now and then when they don't agree on something. Newt was quiet not even throwing in an opinion here and there like he would even on a semi off day. Thomas noticed pretty quickly but decided to play it by ear. The glade came up in Minho’s and Gally's conversation and Thomas watched Newt’s whole-body change, tense, not noticeably, but when you’ve been monitoring someone's body language, and it suddenly changes you're going to notice. He wasn't zoned out like he was, and he was very aware but not pleasantly he looked down to his feet before speaking. 

“I'm heading in for the night.”

 Minho and Gally nodded, not wanting to pause their obviously interesting new topic.

“Me too”

Thomas spoke not too quickly after Newt, making sure not to alarm Minho or Gally. Newt and Thomas shared a cabin, so Thomas thought to catch up to Newt to walk with him to their cabin, once he stood up, he realized Newt was headed the wrong direction he was walking in the direction towards what they call the Cliff, Newt ‘heading in for the night’ didn't seem very true at that point. So, Thomas decided something was up. By the time he had properly worked out where Newt was going, he couldn't even see Newt, he began to walk off and heard Minho raise his voice slightly from behind him. 

“Had a bit too much to drink mate?” 

Followed by two different laughs, Thomas rolled his eyes and flicked him the middle without looking back honestly, more worried about Newt to care, he didn't want to affect the two boy’s seemingly peacefulness. He knew something was up and he also knew Newt doesn't open up so if Thomas was right this was going to be ruff. 

Thomas reached the cliff seeing Newt standing up, his back turned to him, shoulders slouched forward and his body trembling. The image of Their perfect Newt crumbled significantly seeing him there. But it only made Thomas realize how much admiration he had for him.

“shuck”

Newt spoke in a whisper like he knew Thomas was there making him freeze, Newt didn’t show any other indication he knew was there, so Thomas stood like even more of an idiot studying Newt’s body language, Newt brought his hands to his face swearing again much less hushed. 

Newt was getting more and more obviously upset so Thomas finally moved closer softly grabbing Newt's wrists. Newt jumped pulling back almost immediately but Thomas only squeezed his wrists pulling them away from his face speaking softly.

“It's alright, it's just me.” 

Newt looked up with glassy bloodshot eyes making Thomas's heart shatter. Thomas let go of Newt's wrists pulling him into a soft easily escapable embrace, but he only squeezed tighter when he felt Newt pulling him closer holding onto him like he was going to disappear at any moment he was sobbing softly into His shirt. 

“Shh it's ok, I've got you, I'm not going anywhere, you're safe, just breathe.”

Thomas repeated many different words just to try and calm Newt down the best he could, But Newt didn't, Thomas realized, maybe too late that Newt didn't need to calm down he didn't need to stop crying he needed someone to hold him, someone to listen to him and someone to just to be with him to help him get through the hard times. Thomas wanted to be that person for Newt, Thomas guided Newt to a grassy area and began to sit him down leaning against a rock supporting 99% of Newt he sat down and spoke softly once more. 

“It's ok, just relax now.”

Thomas adjusted their position holding onto Newt's shoulder and bringing him close, letting Newt rest his head on his chest and sliding his fingers through Newt's hair. Newt didn’t calm down if anything he began to cry more but Thomas knew he needed it, so he sat quietly whispering to Newt. Newt began to apologies choking on his own words repeatedly grabbing Thomas’s shirt in the process, but Thomas only held on to tighter whispering into his ear again.

“There’s no need to apologies, just let it all out.”

He felt Newt tremble more rapidly and hold his breath.

“Newt just breath it will pass, you just have to calm down.”

“No, I'm sorry, let me go, I'm fine.”

Hearing those words come out of Newt's mouth hurts ‘I'm fine’ those same words get said by him thousands of times a day and no one has ever questioned it.

“Newt stop apologizing right here and I'm not going anywhere.”

Thomas spoke just as soft as he had before but still with as much love as possible, they sat with Thomas speaking softly to Newt for 15 more minutes before Newt's sobs subsided his trembling was a different story as it continued, he moved his hand from Newts hair to his hands which he was cradling in his chest. 

“Bloody hell newt your freezing”

Newt did not respond, just trembling in Thomas' hold.

“Come on, let's get you back to the cabin.”

“No please Tommy, I can't”

Thomas moved his hand to Newt's hair once more, tracing his fingers through it in a familiar pattern.

“Newt, you're freezing, you can't stay out here.”

“I can’t”

Thomas removed his hand from Newt's hair he felt Newt's body shiver noticeably once more and began pulling his jacket off and leaning them both forward to cover Newt with it then resuming their position once more.  

Newt stopped shaking and Thomas assumed or rather hoped he had warmed up by bringing his hand down from newts' hair to feel his forehead ‘good.’

“Newt, are you feeling up to going to the cabin now?”

Newt slowly nodded but didn't make an attempt to move. Thomas didn't want to move either, but the coldest part of the night hadn’t even hit yet so he knew they should head back. 

Thomas stood up, leaving his jacket with Newt and holding his hand out to him, once Newt stood up, he wrapped his arm around Newt's shoulders, and they began to walk back in silence.

They got back to the cabin no problem and Thomas let newt go in first making sure no one was around before heading in too. When he got in there was one light on and Newt was wrapped in his jumper facing the wall on his bed.

“Newt?”

Thomas whispered wondering if it was even possible that Newt fell asleep that quickly but after standing on his toes, he caught a glimpse of Newt's still glassy eyes looking at the wall. Thomas sat down on the right side of the bed that was not occupied leaning against the bed head and resting his hand on Newt's shoulder, he shivered under touch untensing shortly after knowing it was just Thomas.

“Newt, look at me please, I know you're awake.” 

Newt shook his head.

“Okay then just listen, I don't expect you to talk about this ever in fact as far as I'm concerned it didn't happen but all I ask is you just tell me if you're not doing so good I want to help. if you do want to talk about it, I'm all ears and do not think that I'm taking pity on you or I'm upset at you for any of this happening.

Thomas moved his hand from his shoulder down to Newt's hand squeezing it before getting up and going to his bed. 

“Night Newt”

Thomas did not sleep for the rest of the time he laid there. Nothing happened as far as he knew until he stood up slightly looking at Newt who was still awake and continued walking out to their porch leaning over the edge of the railing he felt the cool breeze ruffle his hair and then he heard the footsteps from inside he waited for them to stop or maybe even pause before heading back in, the light was still on and his jumper had been placed on his bed and newt was back against the wall. Thomas sighed hung the jacket up on a hook turned the light off and got back into bed, he stared at the ceiling looking over at newt who was now tossing in his bed then back at his ceiling he heard newt stop moving and looked over again to see newt standing in front of him.

“Holy, Newt you scared me.”

Newt didn't answer, only looking down at Thomas once more. Thomas sat up reaching up to Newt's cheek and sliding his thumb under his eye feeling damp. Thomas knew Newt couldn't sleep so he moved back patting his original spot on the bed. 

“Come on” 

Newt looked at his hand and then sat down. 

“Tommy?”

“Hmm?”

“Did you mean what you said, when you said that you weren't upset?”

“Of course, I would never be upset at you for something like that.”

“What about you wanting to help?”

Thomas paused, was Newt actually asking for help? He quickly realized he’d paused for too long in fact he shouldn't have paused at all, but Newt immediately spoke again.

“Sorry, never mind, get some sleep.”

Newt began to stand up, but Thomas grabbed his wrist again.

“Newt, I meant every word please I promise just please sit back down.”

He did and Thomas sat up fully. 

“It's just that I love Minho. I really do but everything is just so natural with you it's like everything I say you just get, and I don't want him to have to worry about me anymore especially after everything that has happened…

“Newt, I feel the same, don't worry but you need to understand I can't help if you don't let me or even tell me.”

It was quiet again and Thomas released Newt was still crying. Thomas's heart aches to just make all of Newt's pain go away, but he can do his best for now.

“Newt, do you want to talk about it?”

Newt shook his head and Thomas barely saw but didn't try asking again or for a verbal answer. Newt didn’t stop crying and Thomas didn't know what to do to help him so he did the only thing he knew how to do and hugged him pulling him closer to him and resting his head on Newt’s he began whispering sweet words to him and tracing circles over his hand he felt Newt relax at the obvious physical contact and Thomas could only hold a small smile at that speaking cautiously.

“We’ll get through this newt I promise, for now you desperately need some sleep.”

Thomas didn’t know how to ask Newt to stay so he just lifted his hand off Newt's shoulder moving the sheets from underneath him and inviting him to lie down. Newt moved with little thought and Thomas rested his hand over Newt's waist once he was comfortable holding his hand and speaking one last time. 

“Goodnight newt”

“G’night tommy”

With that they both fell asleep not quickly, but they did.

Chapter Text

Thomas woke up the next morning to Newt moving uncomfortably in his arms, Thomas still half a sleep brought his arm further around Newts waist pulling him towards him feeling newt immediately relax. 

“Too early, sleep” 

Was all Thomas said when he felt Newt sigh and sit up? 

“Ugh, I was comfortable.”

“Sorry Tommy just go back to sleep.”

Thomas nearly did still feeling the lingering warmth but quickly woke up when he realized it was too early for Newt to be up and the sun had only barely risen. Thomas reluctantly sat up getting out of bed and walking to where Newt had just walked out the door, he walked out seeing Newt sitting on the chair just out their door looking out to the forest he hadn't even noticed Thomas standing there until Thomas spoke.

“Newt?”

Newt jumped nearly straight out of his seat. 

“Sorry, sorry thought you knew I was there.”

Newt cleared his throat speaking.

“Thomas go back to bed.”

His voice was glistening with emotion, Thomas knew he was putting his walls up.

“I think I should more be telling you that.”

“Thomas don't”

“Don't what?”

“Don't start acting all weird because of what happened last night.”

“I'm not newt, I'm being serious it's too early no one else is up go back to bed.”

“I'm not tired.” 

“Newt”

~

“I'm not tired tommy.”

“Newt it's too early go back to sleep.”

“No”

Newt pouted at Thomas making Thomas roll his eyes. 

“Fine I guess we're both going to be awake to early.”

“Fine” 

Newt was being stubborn because he couldn't go back to sleep, he had just had a dream he didn't want to revisit ever again of course he didn't tell Thomas that but Thomas had a feeling. 

“If we're both staying awake i think you should at least come over here so we can talk.”

“Alright”

Newt crept across the room climbing into Tommy’s bunk Thomas sat up making room for newt to sit next to him and lean against the wall Thomas lowered his voice to a whisper.

“What was it about?”

He wrapped his arm around newt letting him rest his head on his shoulder like he had done for him many times before. 

“How did you know?”

“I was already awake when you started talking and then you shot up so I kinda guessed.”

Newt was embarrassed but having Thomas there made everything seem like it didn't matter, like his embarrassment was unneeded in front of Thomas.

~

“Newt”

Thomas was knelt down in front of him.

“You okay now?”

“Mm”

Thomas let out a breath before standing up and walking back into the cabin. He returned with a blanket in hand, giving it too Newt.

“Thank you tommy.”

“For what?”

“Everything” 

“Um you're welcome?”

They both laughed softly, Thomas now sitting in the seat opposite Newt. Both looking out into the distance.

~

Newt was okay for the rest of that day he was doing his jobs making conversation with everyone even if it was small and he was feeling better or so he looked Thomas still worried Newt was going to wander off going to leave without telling anyone, but he didn't speak his mind, especially not to Newt himself. Dinner rolled around and Thomas sat opposite Newt Minho to his side and Gally next to Newt. Gally and Minho had started an argument over who was faster, even though it was clearly Minho and asked for Newt’s and his opinion Thomas wanted to stay neutral but gave in admitting Minho was, but Newt remained quiet. Pushing his food around Minho and Gally took no notice continuing their augment and if they did, they didn't show it. Thomas still added to the conversation and watched Newt at the same time. Newt was fidgeting yet he was still staring at the same spot on the table. Thomas was finished and figured Newt was too as he wasn’t eating anymore, Thomas nudged Newt from under the table bringing Newt's attention to him. Thomas signaled Newt too leave with him interrupting the ongoing conversation.

“I'm headed in, don’t let me interrupt your very important conversation though.”
Minho and Gally both snorted at that rolling their eyes.

“Night then”

After that he stood up hearing Newt stand up Aswell, then walk off similarly. By the time he had reached the entrance of the dining area Newt was just behind him wordlessly Thomas wrapped his arm around Newt’s shoulder leading him onto a path to the beach

~
Minho nudged Gally’s elbow pointing at Newt and Thomas.

“How long?”

“A day at best”

“Nah Newts too much of an overthinker for that, two”

“You're on”

They shook hands placing their bets on Newt and Thomas like they had in the Glade when Thomas first arrived.

~

“Newt?”

“Mm”

“How are you feeling?”

They had already arrived at the beach sitting down on the sand letting the small waves calm their minds.

“I'm fine, really I am.”

Thomas squeezed Newt’s shoulder.

“Weren’t hungry tonight?”

“No” 

The sun was setting, and Newt was giving very vague answers. 

“Are you tired?”

“No”

“Are you sure?”

Thomas was more teasing Newt than anything he knew Newt was tired because he was and if he was Newt definitely was.

“No” 

“No?” 

“Slim it”

Thomas huffed a laugh letting the air go quiet aside from the waves. Soon after their comfortable silence he felt Newt fighting sleep, slowly letting his head fully rest on Thomas’s shoulder then taking it back, eventually Thomas spoke.

“Come on you need to sleep.”

Newt sighed. 

“Up you get.”

Thomas had already made his way to his feet holding his hand out (Deja vu) once newt took it, they were already walking back.

~

They made it back to their cabin, hearing Minho and Gally just arriving, closing their door to the cabin and shortly arriving at their own. Newt went in first as always and Thomas closed the door behind them. Newt through himself into bed making Thomas flash an amused smile in his direction. 

“Not tired, are you?”

Newt groaned in response, only making Thomas laugh.

“Good night newt.”

“Night Tommy” 

Thomas shut the light off Newt had turned on upon walking in and got into his own bed fully ready for a goodnight’s sleep.

His goodnight sleep was interrupted by his own dreams deciding his fate. 

~

“Please tommy please”

Tears ran down his face. 

“I can't”

“Do it”

“No” 

“Please” 

Newt's eyes faded going dark; it wasn't Newt. it looked like Newt, felt like Newt, sounded like Newt, it was Newt he can't kill him.

“DO IT”

Newt grabbed Thomas’s jacket reefing him up and slamming him down on the hard floor. 

“I can't, I won't”

Newt reached for Thomas’s knife pulling it from his pants a sad smile plastered his face. 

“I'm sorry Tommy”

~

Thomas woke up sitting straight in his bed, tears still streaming down his face. He took a quick look around the room, Newt catching his eye as soon as he came into view Thomas’s eyes adjusted and he saw Newt breathing steadily. Thomas calmed, rubbing his eyes hastily and laying back down to look at the ceiling. An hour passed and Thomas, although he needed it, couldn't whim himself to sleep, he was thinking about lots of things, one of which turned out to be Gally and Minho. He was more thinking about how quickly they had gotten on especially after Chuck. He tried to think about something else after that rolling to his side and looking at his bedside table. 

~

“Take it”

A wooden figure was placed into Thomas’s hand.

“No were getting out of here, even you.”

“Thomas, take it, Give it to my Mum for me.”

Tears filled Thomas’s eyes closing his hand around the wooden figure and holding his hand around Chuck’s hands.

“It okay, You're going to be okay.”

Thomas was telling Chuck this, he was, wasn’t he, he looked down seeing Chuck smile sadly up at him.

“Thank you”

~

Thomas’s eyes cleared only to be met with watery vision, feeling tears wet his face once more. It took a second for all of his senses to register fully but as they did he was met with the sound of someone moving on the other side of the room, Newt. Thomas stood up to see if Newt was awake only to find Newt hugging in on himself with tears wandering down his face. A pain met Thomas’s heart and weight added pressure to his stomach. 

“Please, no”

Newt whispered.

“NO”

He shot up body tensed immensely and his eyes wide open.

“Tom-, tommy”

He whispered once more, bringing his knees to his chest he began to rock, it was a common way to help get over the dream and move on while still being in it. Thomas knew the nightmare he’d had many similar before, Newt didn’t know Thomas was right there standing next to him, he was still half asleep, still stuck in between. 

“Newt” 

Thomas rested his hand on newt's knee, sitting next to him, Newt instinctively pulled away. 

“No”

It was a plea he still wasn't fully awake.

“Newt” 

Thomas shook him gently he didn't want to see Newt like this anymore Newt’s head turned to Thomas his eyes wide staring at Thomas his eyes searched his face then his chest watching it rise and fall.

“Tommy?”

Thomas felt a tear fall at that name. He felt all of the meaning to that name rush to him; the emotion it held being said by Newt, It didn’t hurt; It felt like love. One word, one name it felt like love, Home. Hundreds of times he’s been called Tommy hundreds of Moments, and this one was like the first time, It had finally registered. Newt cried all whilst looking at Tommy his eyes still wide not wanting to blink in case he disappears. Thomas moved closer to him opening his arms and hugging Newt he tried to tell Newt everything was alright, that he was right here and not going anywhere with one embrace and yet he still whispered to Newt.

“It's alright, I'm right here not going anywhere I promise.”

Newt nodded his head in his embrace like he was telling himself it was true, It was. Minutes passed, Newt still cried, and Thomas still held him, now drawing circles on his back. Newt was slowly calming down and also slowly falling asleep due to the calming physical contact he was receiving. Thomas knew Newt was falling asleep, yet he didn’t have the heart to move him or tell him. He continued to whisper to him, continued to trace the similar pattern and eventually he continued to hold him when he was asleep.

Chapter Text

Thomas stayed awake the whole night not wanting to give reliving his dreams a chance but also not wanting to wake Newt up by accident. The sun was rising, brightening the safe haven as it had every day since they arrived but today felt different, he felt like he was forgetting something. Newt stirred beside him making Thomas turn his head in reaction.

“Tommy?’

“Mhm”

Newt's eyes went to the window registering the sun’s rising. 

“Tommy, how long have you been awake for?”

“Don’t worry about it”

Newt hummed, rubbing his eyes and moving to get comfortable. Thomas smiled once Newt had decided he was comfortable resting his head on Thomas shoulder and holding his hands to his chest. Thomas rested back on the bed head running his finger through Newt's hair. He got a pleasant hum once more.

“Newt?”

“Mm”

“Do you get them often?”

Newt was still like he’d been caught red handed for stealing, he still answered.

“Yes. Why?”

“It just we’ve been sharing a cabin a few weeks now and I’ve never noticed.”

“Mm”

“Can you promise me something?”

“Yeah”

“Promise me if I'm not already awake you'll wake me up if something like that happens.”

Thomas felt the argument coming but interrupted him.

“Newt you agreed.”

“Tommy-”

“Newt, i mean it i want you to wake me up, I don't care what time it is, what day it is, i don't even care if we’ve just had an argument i want you to wake me up.”

Newt thought momentarily. 

“Alright”

“Good” 

Newt fidgeted moving his leg around but only his right making something in Thomas click he knew what he was forgetting. Once he realized everything made more sense, Newt being quiet, Newt going up to the Cliff, Newt having a reaction to even the slight mention of the glade. He was grieving his attempt.

Thomas held Newt closer whispering into his hair.
“Im sorry Newt”

~

Thomas watched Newt as he always has, he remembered everything about what they had, every memory, every act of kindness, every day he held Newt close, every moment until he wasn't there. He still cherished those Happy memories, watching him in hope to be reunited with him one day. 

Newt woke up early. 

That's different. 

He was walking to the maze. 

Maybe they were doing something different today? 

He went in alone. 

That's a bit strange. 

He was searching for something. 

And then he was climbing. 

Crying.

Falling. 

Dying. 

Thomas covered his mouth holding his breath and tears. No one else even noticed. He was crying damit. He walked out of the room down the hall and into the bathroom. Tears noticeably getting more and more as he looked at himself in the mirror memories came flooding. Everything was hurting and he was gasping for air, He fell to the floor grasping his knees cradling them for any kind of support they could provide.

~

A tear steamed down Thomas’s face as he was pushed out of his own head, seeing Newt looking at him already. 

“Thomas?” 

He swallowed pushing the tears down.

“Mhm?”

“Why did you say sorry?”

Thomas started at Newt how would he even say this, how could he tell someone what he was sorry for if he couldn't even say it out loud.

“Did Minho tell you?”

Emotions overran Newts facial expression guilt, betrayal, anger, sadness.

“Thomas-” 

“Newt, he didn’t tell me, I was watching. I was following your every movement until I couldn't watch anymore.”

Newt fell silent tears began once more down Thomas’s face. Newt stood up he was angry.

“Tell me one thing, have you known the whole time.”

“Newt-” 

Thomas stopped speaking as Newt left out the door. Thomas knew he shouldn’t go after him, at least not straight away, everything in him wanted to, he wanted to just hold Newt until everything around them disappeared, until everything stopped hurting.

~

Thomas told Minho what happened. Minho assured him Newt would be back and that Thomas was right in letting him cool down but to find him that night. Minho didn’t need to say why but Thomas worked that out for himself. Thomas tried to act as normal as possible, helping Brenda out with things in the repair shop, speaking with Minho, Gally, Brenda, Frypan and Aris during lunch but skipping dinner. He pulled Minho aside once more before going to find Newt.

“Minho?” 

“Yea?”

“Are you sure you shouldn’t be the one going to see him?”

“Thomas, as much as I would like to say yes, he has opened up to you more than he has to me the whole time we’ve known each other. I love him, I really do but I'm not the right person.”

“Thank you”

Minho pulled Thomas into a quick embrace squeezing him before nodding and walking to the dining area leaving Thomas alone to guess where Newt would be. He first checked their cabin just in case, then he walked along the forest line where nothing had been built yet, then he went to the cliff he knew Newt would be there, but he didn’t want him to be. He didn't want to see Newt standing at the edge of anything ever again whether it be looking down to a concrete floor or rocky filled water. Arriving at the cliff he saw Newt sitting with his knees to his chest, his arms holding them into place looking out onto the water. He got closer to Newt, the exhaustion on his face was far more obvious when his eyes were closed, when tears were running down his face no matter how many times, he wiped them. Thomas didn’t know whether to announce himself or sit with him in silence, Let Newt know he has someone. 

“Are you going to stand there all day?”

Newt’s voice was cracked from the limited number of words he’s spoken today, also from the clear amount he’s been crying. Thomas moved sitting next to Newt following his line of sight out to the water, eventually he followed that exact line back to Newt’s face looking over every bit of his face, his eyes. His hair, his nose anything he could see he took it in.

“It’s pathetic really, Grieving my own death mission.”

A still steady flow of tears trailed down Newts face.

“No, it's not, if anything its Honorable.”

Newt scoffed His eyes hadn’t left the water not even to look at Thomas.

“Newt?”

“Mm” 

“Why did you do it?”

He was quiet. a sad smile pulled at his mouth. The moon uncovered by the clouds shone on his face. He pulled something off from around his neck holding it out to Thomas.

“You're going to be okay tommy.”

Thomas couldn’t understand wasn’t Newt the one who needed to be told that?

“What do you mean?”

“5 Stages”

~

Denial 

Thomas held Newt moments after. He cried, he screamed, he shouted, he whispered, he spoke, he yelled, he just wanted him to be alive, be okay, he couldn't handle anymore loss especially not Newt. He stayed with him repeating the words that were spoken moments before it happened. He played them over and over wishing and pretending it was still happening, picturing a different ending. It didn’t work.

~

Anger 

Thomas left Newt he left the one stable thing he had, all this time. He wasn’t just sad; he was absolutely torn, and he was angry. The only thing fueling him to go back into that building was anger, the only thing fueling him to be walking away from Newt was the Anger the revenge. He wasn’t going back for Teresa he was going back for a cure and a revenge and maybe even something to save Newt.

~

Bargaining

He tried everything to make them go back to make them take him back to Newt, he had the cure, the answer and he couldn’t save him. Not anymore, Minho held him restraining him from exiting the plane he yelled, he hit, and he kicked everyone he could he just wanted to go back he wanted to give newt another chance at life to be happy, with him.

~

Depression 

Thomas hadn’t left his cabin; he hadn’t eaten, and he hadn’t spoken in months. Everyone tried to talk to him, see him even but no one could, they wondered if he was even still alive but nonetheless, he didn’t let anyone in. one morning a year after the death of his best friend. Thomas came out and no one noticed until Minho found him sitting in the dining area. His eyes were red, bloodshot, his under eyes were purple and he was shaking uncontrollably but when he saw Minho his eyes lit like the first time he had seen him. He brought him into a hug.

~

Acceptance

Thomas watched Newt pull something off from around his neck holding it out to Thomas.

“You going to be okay Tommy.”

“What do you mean?”

“5 Stages”

Thomas took the necklace, Newt’s hands held his around it, Newt was freezing. Why was he so cold?

“I love you, Tommy.”

Thomas looked up from the necklace Newt was gone. Looking back down he saw tears fall from his face and he saw the necklace still in his hand. All of the time he had spent with Newt at the safe haven wasn’t real. Newt didn’t talk to anyone but Thomas because he wasn’t there. He was crying because Thomas's mind was ready to let him go but his heart wasn't. His last memory of Newt was him crying or rather more dying, the rest was supplied by his mind and his alone. His mind had projected his problems onto his fictional best friend, and Minho had one the bet. He wasn’t ready to say goodbye. So, Newt did it for him.

Thomas had accepted Newt was dead.