Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Feral cat.

Unlike domestic cats, feral cat are often very wary of humans. They are aggressive, fastidious and often live alone, or will live in groups with one animal as the leader because they attach great importance to territorial regulations.

But underneath that fierce shell is a child, an unfortunate child who also wants to be loved.

When a domestic cat knows it is about to die, it will leave home, but a stray cat will just leave it alone. It can die in some dirty place or it can also die on the street or on someone's roof. May also died in a territorial disputewith other animals.

Sakura also thought so, no friends, no family, no relationship made his mind slowly die day after day. Sakura also wonderedIf he dies how long would it take the neighbors to find out?

But he never thought that the day he would actually die would have someone by his side.

Until he met them.

Pain spread throughout Sakura's body, he could feel blood everywhere in his vision and taste. The incomprehensible buzzing from his friends around did nothing to help Sakura feel better. His mind returned to that day, the day Sakura was alone with the sounds of criticism and sarcasm from everyone.

His friends were trying to keep him awake, of which two faces were the most visible. Nirei's face was full of tears, trembling, holding Sakura's arm tightly, he moved his lips and said something. Suo looked very scared, had Sakura ever seen him this scared?

The surrounding people were also surrounding, they were worried, scared and trying to help Sakura.

Damn it, how did he get here?

"S-sorry! But you have to t-try hard Sakura-kun!! Y-you'll be t- taken to the hospital soon!" Nirei stuttered, looking very scared as he looked at Sakura.

Don't apologize.

Sakura winced but it was enough to hurt him.

"Sakura-kun!!"

"Fuck! Hurry!! Carry him to the hospital!!" Hiragi's hurried voice rang out. Sakura couldn't see him, his vision began to blur.

Pain invaded Sakura's entire body, his body gradually softened to the ground. Before completely sinking into darkness, Sakura saw Umemiya and Kotoha, both wearing two funny aprons, eyes wide open and running towards Sakura.

"Sakura!!"

Behind them were a few other familiar-looking people.

Heh, Sakura didn't expect that he would be able to meet his seniors for the last time this way.

Oh right, today they have a dinner date with their seniors and friends...

Sakura's head tilted to the side, his two-toned eyes lost their shine, his eyelids and white hair were smeared with blood. The chest gently lowers and will never rise again. His body was lifted off the road, many hands touched him.

Ambient background noise disappears completely.

Pain slid from Sakura's body.

The cat stood up, its two-colored eyes looking toward the bright light.

Thump.

Thump!

Gasp!!

Sakura jumped up from the futon, his body covered in sweat. Breathing is rapid, heart is beating fast. But the strange thing is that the pain is no more.

He quickly lifted the blanket and touched his entire body, there were no bandages, not even any blood or bruises.

What the hell just happened?!

Sakura widened him eyes and looked out at the bright balcony outside. His room had returned to its old state, old and rotten.

That's not right, hasn't it been fixed by everyone??

The phone is also not as noisy as usual. Sakura stared at it. A moment later, a text message about the weather appeared on the phone screen.

He doesn't care about it, the only thing he cares about right now is the date on it.

Is this day, this month, this year the first day Sakura came to Makochi Street?

What the hell is going on?!

__

What the hell is happening here??

Sakura looked confusedly at the bottle of hair dye and contact lenses on the sink. His eyebrows furrowed and he looked around as if looking for something, and stopped at the object hidden under the towel behind the door.

A mirror.

The mirror was broken on the left side by some impact, but it was still visible.

His eyebrows furrowed tightly. The face remained unchanged, still has unusual two-colored eyes and unusual white hair and eyebrows on one side. If Sakura looked closely, him could see that part of his white hair had a little gray left in it.

Sakura glanced at the dye bottle again.

Black dyed type.

This isn't him.

"Tch! this is so weird."

Sakura took two items he had never used and stuffed them into a plastic bag. He hates these two things, Sakura may not like his strange appearance very much but has never wanted to cover them up in such a cowardly way.

To be sure, Sakura went back to the room and searched the box to see if there were still any of these strange things? If he has to look at this again next time, he will angrily throw it out the window.

There are many bottles of dye.

"Is this crazy guy going to drink dye instead of water?!" Sakura forcefully threw them into a plastic bag.

Apart from a few bottles of dye, nothing in the box has changed.

No, there's a strange notebook.

Sakura has never seen this, and in his previous life he never brought this with him.

It looked so old and worn out as if it had been used for a long time. The notebook's background is a monotonous yellow color. There is something written in the left corner of the notebook but it has been crossed out with black ink.

A strange feeling rose in Sakura's chest, he opened the notebook, the first page had a few lines crossed out.

The following pages were the same, many passages were crossed out with strong hand force, and on some pages there were circular stains left as if water had fallen in. The notebook was almost used up, Sakura carefully observed each page. He noticed that a few pages had been torn out.

Reading it doesn't take too much time. Sakura looked down at the last day the diary was written, which was yesterday.

He tilted his head to the dye bag lying next to him, searching for the contact lenses and medicine bottle he was using. The hate about them is no longer strong.

"Tch." Sakura clicked he tongue and took the things into the bathroom.

_______

"Hey, that hurts!"

The group of men chuckled as they forced her into the corner. An angry Kotoha was about to throw the egg bag at the man's face, but someone else did it before her.

The guy hit his face on the ground after the punch, the remaining guys growled at the same time and rushed at the bystander. But in just a blink of an eye, the entire group of thugs was at his feet.

Kotoha rubbed her eyes, almost not believing the other boy's speed.

Fuurin's uniform with two distinctive colors made her even more curious about this person. She felt like even though he was wearing that, they never knew each other.

The sound of wind chimes filled the air, his hood fell off letting his black hair fly in the direction of the wind. Sakura turned around, his gray eyes looking at Kotoha.

Chapter Text

"So you really aren't from here, right?" Kotoha placed a plate of omurice in front of Sakura, then turned around and pulled out a spoon, carefully wiping it before giving it to him.

"It's quite strange that you're here." She speaks.

The last time Sakura heard this, he thought she was calling him a weirdo.

"Maybe..." Sakura already knew she wasn't talking about him but 
ơwas still upset to hear this again. He frowned and took the spoon from Kotoha's hand.

Kotoha leaned her hands on the table, curiously watching Sakura's uncomfortable expression. It didn't take long for her to realize there was something he didn't like. "Don't worry, I don't mean you."

Sakura didn't reply but took a large spoonful and put it in him mouth. Omurice is always his top priority when going out to eat. He loved this taste. His friends said many times that Sakura took it too seriously, but later on no one said anything, especially after Sakura punched the person in the face who said it wasn't delicious.

Looking at that lovely boy's sparkling, enjoying face, Kotoha felt proud, there was nothing happy about having someone acknowledge that her food was delicious.

"Oh right, my name is Tachibana Kotoha." She placed her hand on her chest and introduced herself.

Sakura looked up at her, rolling him eyes like he was thinking about something. Kotoha tilted her head, a bit confused but still waiting for his response. It took a few minutes for Sakura to turn back to her and respond, but he didn't look too comfortable having to say his name.

"Sakura Haruka."

"Sakura Haruka? what a beautiful name." Kotoha said honestly.

Sakura - cherry blossom.

Being praised, as usual Sakura blushed and turned away. He has never been able to correct his strange reaction habits. Sakura's friends say he doesn't need to be fixed because those habits created him. Create the future leader of Furin.

After Umemiya graduated, his successor as leader was Sakura. He said he would officially give it to him on the last day, but then Sakura had a problem...

And...

Sakura felt like he had forgotten something.

Death...

His death!

That's right, how did he die.

Sakura couldn't remember what attacked him then.

But if he knew who did it, Sakura would rush straight in and punch that guy to death. Network changes network.

Do you know how long it took him to climb to the top of Furin?!

If he die, why don't he just die straight away? being thrown back into the past with a different nature?? If it weren't for the diary's wishes, he would have thrown all his medicine and contact lenses out the door. Sakura still doesn't understand why he so easily accepted that?!

What was he thinking at that time??

"Thank you for the meal, Kotoha."

Kotoha stopped cleaning the cup and happily walked up to the old man. "Thank you for coming again, Yama - ji!!"

"Please be careful." She enthusiastically opened the door for him.

Mr. Yama nodded and replied: "Next time I will come again..." But then Sakura interrupted him.

"You forgot this." Sakura placed the bag in Mr. Yama's hands, and without turning around, stood there.

The old man suddenly blinked, then smiled, reaching into his pocket to search. "Damn, I forgot my things again."

"Thank you, here it is for you." Mr. Yama raised his fist. Sakura looked at him, him frown starting to widen. He opened his hand and obediently accepted the candy.

The colorful candy packages fit neatly in the palm of his hand. Mr. Yama patted his hand a few times, smiled sincerely and said: "Thank you again."

Sakura's face turned red. He opened his mouth to refuse the thanks like a habit, but then closed it tightly and turned away.

Kotoha, who witnessed all this scene, looked really surprised. Sakura turned around, their eyes clashing.

"What?" He opened his mouth without thinking.

"Ah, nothing." Kotoha waved her hand, the expression on her face changed to a strangely happy one. Ignoring his raised eyebrow, Kotoha returned to the table to clear the plates. And Sakura then returned with him plate of omurice.

"So what's your purpose in coming here?" She asked and set her cup aside, glancing over her shoulder at Sakura.

"Become a top Furin."

Kotoha stood still, bewildered and turned to Sakura. Sakura didn't look at her, him eyes looked down at the floor.

Sakura's purpose is only one and never changes. He recognized Umemiya as the leader many times, but that did not stop Sakura from giving up him goal.

Kotoha still looked surprised when he heard him talk about the purpose of coming here. Sakura turned back to look at her. He wasn't babbling clearly about what he had said so he really wanted to see what Kohota's reaction would be.

"Heh, such a big ambition." Kotoha turn down the cup and wipe her hands with a towel, looking expectant and smiling at Sakura. "But it will be difficult, you know."

Her reaction was much different. Different than he expected.

"Why do you look so surprised?" Kotoha raised her eyebrows.

"Ah... nothing." Sakura didn't look at her, rubbed the back of him neck and put down the spoon.

"You must be looking forward to tomorrow, even wearing your uniform in advance."

Sakura's face turned red again, he stammered back: " I- I just don't have many clothes!!"

Then he clumsily got up from his chair and left to the sound of  joyful laughter from inside the shop.

What's with that weird reaction?!

Sakura remembered that last time it was Kotoha who was the first to point out his biggest mistake on the way to becoming the top Furin. Weird, so weird.

What the hell is happening here?!

Sakura never realized that he had unintentionally changed other people's views of himself.

So if Sakura kept him eccentric appearance, would things still be the same?

For them, probably not?...

[I wish I was born as a normal-looking child.]

That damn diary entry!

What the fuck do you wish for?!

"Hey, don't ignore me!" A large group of thugs gathered in front of Sakura, they arrogantly raised their faces towards him and was punched in the face afterward..

The punched man fell into his accomplices, blood pouring out of his nose like a waterfall at the same time, causing the thugs behind him to freeze for several minutes, they looked up awkwardly.

"in the nick of time." Sakura cracked his knuckles, veins appearing on his jaw joint.

The thugs growled, charging at Sakura like a pack of mice attacking a cat.

A ferocious feral cat.

Kotoha in the shop heard the noise and quickly ran out. A guy nearby saw her and immediately took her as a hostage. He just smiled and pulled out the knife when Sakura jumped out of nowhere and kicked him in the face.

Kotoha blinked, a guy who was about to approach her was kicked by Sakura and hit his face against the wall, his nose bleeding along the wall and he fell down, smeared on the street. It looks so painful.

They were cornered, Sakura stood up to shield her. Kotoha couldn't see his expression from behind, she could only guess that Sakura was trying to manage the situation.

"Tch." Sakura turned around and placed her hands on her body. "Hold on tight!"

"What?-wao?!" Kotoha was surprised when Sakura picked her up, turned him leg and kicked a guy lying on the ground.

He held a knife, the knife shot out causing a few people to lose their attention. Sakura took advantage of that and kicked a guy's leg, making him fall down, then stepped on his shoulder to gain momentum and carry Kotoha to jump and stomp on another guy's face.

Hey, hey, are you using someone's face as a stepping stone??

"Attack his legs!-Ugh!"

Sakura jumped at the person who shouted. whereby he easily escaped the encirclement, but because he was too careless, he let his guard down and didn't notice someone coming from behind. Sakura turned around in surprise.

Kotoha unconsciously tightened her grip on Sakura's shirt. Luckily someone held that stick for them. Just like that day, Hiragi stood up to help Sakura. Sakura could barely hide her joy when she saw him.

"first year? You're very good." Hiragi turned his back to them and easily hit the other guy in the face.

He picked up the stick and directly broke it with his bare hands. All Furin students present rushed to fight.

Sakura learned from last time, he stepped back to avoid the fight and heard the surrounding people shouting and cursing at the thugs. Some people threw tomatoes, others threw eggs to chase them away

"Makochi is like that, they have long considered Bofurin school as the heroes of the town." Kotoha, still in Sakura's arms, also looked up. She glanced back at him after a while without hearing a response. "You don't look too surprised?"

"...Really?" Without looking at her, Sakura responded.

Furin's familiar slogan rang out along with the screams of the people. All the thugs were defeated, people took to the streets and cheered happily.

Sakura dropped Kotoha and winced, waving him left forearm. Kotoha noticed his actions and asked worriedly: "Are you injured?"

"Not really. That bastard actually hit my arm." Sakura grumbled, clenched him fist, then opened it again to inspect. A little inconvenient in moving.

It's true that no matter how strong you are, if your numbers are too overwhelming, it's still disadvantageous. No, he must be stronger to be worthy of the title of Furin leader.

"This kid is also very impressive!!"

"How?how you can carrying Kotoha like that but still fighting!"

"It's so cool!"

Sakura was startled when people gathered around him. His hand was grabbed by the granny who used to worry about Sakura's leg. She squeezed his forearm to check. Sakura winced as she did so.

"Is it painful?" She asked and rubbing his hand.

"A... little?" Sakura said bewildered. He hasn't completely gotten used to kindness even though it's been a while.

The granny squeezed again. Sakura hissed.

"Your biceps are bruised."

"It look hurts but you can still carry Kotoha, that's amazing."

"I really like the way you stomped on those bastards' faces!"

Sakura shyly scratched the back of him neck at the compliments. Kotoha next to him sighed softly, she was already worrying a bit too much.

She looked at Sakura, looking forward to seeing what more surprises this interesting guy would create. She was surprised twice by Sakura today.

Hiragi was also looking at Sakura, he looked up to face her, smiled, waved and quietly left.

__________

"Hurry. Get the hell off on me." Sakura was dissatisfied that he still had to carry this granny even though he had an injured leg like before or a sore arm like now.

"Boy, you told an old lady to jump from this height?" Mrs. Satou shook her head in disappointment.

Sakura shouted angrily: "I haven't even said anything about you pretending to have back pain!!"

"goodness, You're so inconsiderate." Granny Satou jumped off Sakura's back, conveniently came next to Kotoha and then pretended to pat her back, "Oh my god, my back hurts so much."

"Are you tricking a child?!" Sakura jumped up.

Want to trick him again??dream on!

"Haizz...you maybe rude but you're still a Furin boy. You have helped me a lot. Thank you." Mrs. Satou giggled and rubbed his bandaged forearm

The second time he heard this from the old lady, Sakura still blushed, he turned sharply towards Kotoha. Deliberately shouted at her: "I'm hungry!"

"Here, here." Kotoha covered her mouth and turned her back to Sakura to hide her laughter because Sakura would definitely scream again if he saw her laughing.

Sakura sat at the table, took off him hood and ruffled him hair. He doesn't like wearing hats and glasses, using T-shirt with a hat and dyes, contact lenses are Sakura's last limit.

He was forced to wear a T-shirt with a hat because of the dye. If it rained by accident, how could he explain it, it was because the weather was different from the past, The weather forecast is incorrect. Or...

Is it because this is what this damn guy wants?!

If Sakura tried just a little to fulfill he wish and...

himself? then it will be possible...

[I've wanted to try.]

...Damned!

"Kotoha-sannnn!!"

The door swung open and Nirei tripped and fell, interrupting Sakura's thoughts. Granny Satou giggled and greeted him.

Nirei jumped up like a spring and turned around, showing off her flashy, dazzling appearance. That look didn't suit him at all. Sakura narrowed her eyes, pointed again: "The tag's still on it."

Nirei bewilderedly turned around to look for the tag, and tripped and fell again at the door.

"I even forgot to cut the pants tag." He sat up stupidly and show two cards.

Awkward name never changes.

Having to meet his friends again slowly like this is really tiring, it took Sakura a long time to have a good relationship with everyone and now he has to do it again. Again.

[I wonder if I can make friends?]

"..."

Black hair and gray eyes. Sakura still can't have friends with that appearance. Because it's not about his appearance, it's about his belief in himself.

[She called me a monster. What the hell?]

Those diary entries are starting to haunt him. Sakura frowned and exhaled, turning him eyes to Nirei who was staring at him.

"What?"

Nirei was startled by Sakura's ferocity. He shook his head and looked around him curiously, "Are you new here? You're a first year, right?"

"That's right, you two are in the same grade." Kotoha said, putting out the Potus plate. Then wiped her hands and introduced: "Nirei, this is Sakura."

"Sakura?" Nirei took out his familiar notebook, he turned the pages one by one and then looked up at Sakura, did so a few times and then closed the notebook. "I've never heard that name before."

"Why would a nameless person like you want to join Furin? Do you know..." Nirei started babbling and no one really paid attention to what he was saying.

He was full of praise for Bofurin while Sakura finished him meal. Sakura initially intended to punch Nirei when he heard Nirei call him anonymous again, but because Kotoha said not to pay attention so he left.

"Is there water?" Sakura licked him lips and asked.

"Yes, wait a minute." Kotoha quickly responded and returned later with a glass of cool juice.

Nirei finally finished his speech, he turned aggressively and pointed at the counter, "But what the hell is a guy like you who has nothing to do with Bofurin doing here?!"

He pointed at the chair, pointing at Kotoha and granny Satou who were talking.

Huh?

"Hey, is so impolite..." Mrs. Satou rubbed her cheek.

Nirei turned pale and withdrew his hand, quickly shaking his head to explain: "N-no, I'm sorry!I'm talking to Sakura!!"

Kotoha narrowed her eyes in suspicion. Seeing Nirei's sincere regret, she didn't mention it. She sighed and rolled her eyes toward the door. "Sakura left a while ago."

At the same time, she also reminded, "It's time to go."

"What?!"

Before Kotoha could finish speaking, Nirei rushed out of her store at a speed comparable to a race car, messing up her bangs.

This boy.

"Sakura, do you know what color coffee fruit is?" Kotoha raised the coffee pot in front of him.

Sakura didn't understand what she meant. He frowned and hesitantly guessed: "brown...like coffee?"

"God it's getting late!!"

Nirei hurriedly ran and almost fell on the street. He clumsily kept his balance and then continued running to quickly reach Furin school.

"Let me go!"

His body stopped in the direction of the scream, Nirei looked at the group of thugs trying to harm a girl. He looked around bewilderedly.

"It's red. They're smooth, like cherries."

Realizing that there was no one around who could help her except him. Nirei pursed him lips and clenched fist. He doesn't know how to fight, what if he rushes in and hurts her more?

They looked very big, Nirei didn't even have enough strength to hold their legs, let alone stop them?

"At first, I thought the fruit were the beans that they sold in jars."

The girl was cornered and tried her best to struggle. Nirei nervously bit him lip, took a deep breath and braced himself to shout loudly at the thugs.

"But you never know that those were actually the seeds, or if they are white before roasting."

The thugs easily avoided Nirei who was running like a headless fly. He fell, sliding face first to the ground.

"Heh, who's this kid?" A guy sarcastically kicked the toe of his shoe on his shoulder.

"You never know what something really looks like if you're only looking at it from one direction." 

"Isn't this Furin's uniform?"

"Does Furin also have this tiny mouse?"

"This is so bad~"

Nirei awkwardly tried to stand up to protect the other girl. He gritted his teeth at their bad words about Furin. If possible, he just wants to punch them in the face.

"You're free to think however you want, but don't be too hasty to form your opinion"

"Are you okay?" The girl stood nervously behind Nirei. Nirei swallowed his fear and turned sideways to find an opportunity to create a way for the girl to escape.

"I'll try to stop them, you run away!" He shouted lowly, high-pitched and only loud enough for two people to hear.

"How is that possible!?what about you??"

"Don't worry about me!" Nirei trembled and glared at those giants. No matter how strong he was, he still couldn't control his fear.

He could feel them like two mice huddled together, trying to protect each other from predators.

Must find opportunities.

You have to find a way not to affect her!

Must let her escape!

"You should talk to them, really look at them..."

Bang!

A thug was thrown into the left of Nirei and the girl, the impact was so strong that it was deafening. He fell to the ground, his face covered in blood and his nose broken.

Right where he had just fallen, a student wearing a Furin uniform appeared. In his other hand, he held a pile of food from many restaurants in the neighborhood.

"Another mouse!" The leader happily cracked his joints and hummed along with the sound of the wind chimes, "Did you come alone? that's really brave. Come to save your comrades?"

The student looked at them, sighed and licked his lips that still had crumbs on them: "A bunch of weaklings."

The thugs rolled their eyes and growled. "What?! bastard, tell it again!!"

"and understand them or else..."

Nirei could hardly believe his eyes. Each guy, twice as tall as him, lay on the ground. That Furin student turned around and kicked a few guys out of the way.

Most of the bags in his hand just now fell to the ground during the fight. The student, bent down to pick them up. Some of bags were crushed because the thugs stepped on them.

"Those trash." He grunted and kicked the nearest guy, then threw the crushed part into the nearby trash and walked towards Nirei.

"S-Sakura?" Nirei stuttered, losing strength in his knees and falling to the ground. The girl next to him worriedly bowed next to him.

The power he had just witnessed was amazing. Nirei could never have that kind of power.

"T...thank, thank you." Nirei gritted his teeth and tried to force a crooked smile, but because Sakura kept looking at him silently, he couldn't hold it in and lowered his head self-consciously. 

"You must be very disappointed, right? Bofurin is so strong that there is someone like me..."

"I don't think you are like that." Sakura interrupted Nirei. "Instead of sitting there crying and looking like a pathetic person. Why don't you...look at what you've accomplished."

"You'll never really know what person is like, right?" 

Nirei opened his eyes wide and looked up at Sakura. The girl next to him breathed a sigh of relief and gently stroked his shoulder, smiling. "Thank you for helping me."

Nirei burst into tears immediately afterward in the tenderness of the other waitress. Meanwhile, Sakura was blushing with her back turned towards them. Sakura is not good at cheering others up. Surely his friends would laugh out loud if they heard him say those words!!

Sakura could imagine those faces. Ugh, those hateful faces.

"And thank you too." The girl looked up.

Sakura blinked at her then shyly turned away. It took a while to figure out the extremely strange reason:

"I just do it for the cake."

The girl smiled at him and didn't mention that Sakura's reason had nothing to do with this.

Chapter Text

"Sakuraaa!! It's just a little bit, I just need to write down the measurements-"

"Shut!" Sakura blushed, turned around and scolded Nirei, then quickly walked away. Even though this was not the first time seeing this damn action, Sakura felt very strange

"Hey, wait for me!" Nirei hurriedly followed him, muttering into the notebook as he walked. "Black hair, gray eyes..."

[Fuck it. That's weird, why are they still so dazzling?]

Black and gray.

They are his colors but they are not the only two colors. Sakura still has color.

It's white and yellow

"... Hey."

"Huh?" Nirei looked up, still looking interested in the nape of Sakura's hair, feeling like he had just seen some white strands. He glanced over and saw Sakura's shoulders rise and then slowly fall again.

My hair isn't just black. My eyes aren't just gray either.

Sakura pursed his lips and continued walking. "...Nothing." He ignored Nirei, ignored his furrowed eyebrows. Nirei blinked in confusion, following Sakura in hesitation and worry.

After a while he asked: "So what is your purpose in coming to Bofurin?"

"Become the top of Furin."

"Huh??"

Sakura stuffed the cake into his mouth, completely ignoring Nirei following him with so many questions and that damn number book.

The food was quickly eaten by Sakura. How could you blame him? He hadn't eaten at all last night, so Kotoha's meal of course wouldn't be enough to fill Sakura's stomach. Nirei looked surprised as he watched him eat it all in just a short time.

The Furin door right in front of them exuded a gloomy, scary atmosphere. Sakura glanced at the crows that filled the graffiti-covered walls. There were always so many of them, he once wondered why this place could attract this type of bird.

Nirei excitedly ran into the school while he stopped at the school gate, the crows looked at him with tilted heads.

Furin - Bofurin

Machiko town.

Always never change. Sakura's chest ached at the thought of having to enter this place again. No, he's not afraid. Sakura once said that he had no 'home' to return to, Umemiya replied to him at that time:

"You do, Sakura. Haven't I said this city is like a family?"

"Sakura, come here quickly!!" Nirei had entered the school. He turned towards Sakura and grinned, waving both hands to call him. Sakura looked at him, let out a breath to relieve his strange emotions and then slowly entered.

Like a family huh?

Nirei was excited about finding their classroom while Sakura continued to walk ahead of him regardless of what his friend was doing. From excitedly watching to pale-faced following him.

"Sakura..." Nirei trailed behind in a low voice. Sakura slowly glanced at him. He knew what Nirei was going to say, and of course Sakura would never follow through with it.

"Can you...be friendly with your classmates?" Nirei smiled wryly, Sakura looked then silently walked away. As if realizing Sakura's answer, Nirei stuttered and followed him begging. " Please promise, Sakura!! "

Not only did Sakura not listen, he tilted his head and squeezed neck, then waved his forearm, checking how much the bruise affected his fist. Nirei panicked and clung to his other arm. "Sakura what are you doing??"

"warmups." Sakura replied calmly.

"Sakura..." God, he was going to cry.

When the door to class 1-1 opened, Nirei quickly hid behind him, his arm still clinging to Sakura's shirt as if hoping he wouldn't start a fight with the students in the class. All the students in the class looked up at them, Sakura glared down at Nirei. Nirei was startled and released his hand. By the time he realized he was letting Sakura go, it was too late.

Sakura walked up to the only person still sleeping in the classroom. Some students in the class suspected that he was about to start a fight with Sugishita and started whispering. Suo on the side smiled and stopped Nirei who was about to rush forward.

Sugishita looked up, his face grimaced, his eyebrows furrowed deeply with his eyes glaring at the person who had just interrupted his sleep. In his future, no matter how many times they look at each other, no matter how many times they cooperate, they will always quarrel. Sakura used her foot to kick the table, causing the table to hit the corner and break.

Nirei stammered, shaking violently. Sugishita blinked then frowned, growling and rolling his eyes at Sakura. Class 1-1 was watching them, Sakura backed up to the podium, Sugishita walked around to stand facing him. The excitement of fighting again returned to him, it had been a long time since Sakura had fought Sugishita.

Sugishita struck first, using consecutive fists aimed at Sakura's face. They all missed, Sakura took advantage of his agility, which had improved a lot during the first fights, and punched him from under the jaw. The punch wasn't strong, but it was enough to make Sugishita bleed and retreat backwards.

Class 1-1 marveled at their battle. Taiga squinted his eyes, judging by his posture and muscles, he could see. "But the punching power seems to be less limited."

"It's because his arm was injured." Suo pointed out.

Damned. Sakura was annoyed that the pain in his wound had reduced the force of his punch. But whatever, Sugishita looks angry.

The excitement reached a higher level when Sugishita tensed his muscles, charging at Sakura like an animal and aiming for his shoulder. Sakura used the same move he used to hit Sugishita, somersaulting to avoid the move and using his foot to kick him in the jaw again. Sugishita may be strong, but compared to Sakura who has experience fighting Togame and Endo, and thousands of others, there is still a gap.

Each individual has an advantage, Sakura has clearly improved his advantage a lot but of course sometimes unexpected situations cannot be avoided. Sugishita, with a bloody nose, rushed forward and punched Sakura on the left side. Sakura was startled and dodged. Sugishita immediately used his legs to hit the other side.

His arm was visibly purple when he blocked that kick. Sugishita jumped back, panting, glaring at Sakura who was checking the bandage on the other end. The students in the class were filled with excitement and surprise that someone could fight Sugishita.

"S-Sakura, your hand." Nirei stuttered and grabbed the white ribbon Sakura had just thrown away. He worriedly looked at Sakura's swollen arm.

Ignore this awkward bandage, he's only aiming for Sugishita now.

"Ah, one, two, testing, testing."

"..."

Oh yeah, he forgot Umemiya will be the one to break up their fight.

Hiragi and Umemiya argue on the loudspeaker. Nirei looked confused as all the students looked up in bewilderment.

"Hey, cover your ears." Sakura reminded. Nirei was confused and didn't understand what Sakura was saying.

"WELCOME ALL NEW STUDENTS!!"

Besides Suo, who was giggling and covering his ears, and Sakura, who was still a bit startled even though he covered his ears, the remaining students were all startled by Umemiya's loud voice and leaned over. God, why is he shouting so loudly?

Hiragi and Umemiya continue to argue, with Hiragi blaming him for speaking too loudly and Umemiya explaining that he spoke loudly under the pretense of welcoming them. Nirei sat trembling on the ground, the students stood strictly facing the loudspeaker. While Sakura put his hand in pocket, and scratching his sore ear.

"Ahem, okay let's go back. I'm Bofurin's rep, Hajime Umemiya."

Bofurin's leader.

Sakura raised his lips but immediately lowered them when he had to listen to what Umemiya said next. Really, his present or future will never change at all.

"Ah yes, you guys better enjoy your youth." Umemiya chuckled from the broadcast room, he continued speaking and Sugishita nodded repeatedly with sparkling eyes. Sakura once again glanced at him sarcastically.

When mentioning the leopard stone, Nirei accidentally forced his mouth to repeat it with a bewildered smile. Sugishita immediately grabbed his head and threatened, forcing Nirei to say a long sentence before running away and hiding behind Sakura's feet.

"Like I said! I don't think you guys should fight on the first day!"

Class 1-1 stared at Sakura and Sugishita. Sakura rolled his eyes and pulled the hood of shirt so no one could see he was blushing. This time he did it so...well, he didn't know what to say.

"Even if you wiped your bloody nose, everyone would have seen you fight." Suo chuckled as Sugishita tried to use his sleeve to wipe all the blood off his face.

"You too, everyone already sees that you're shy so there's no need to wear hood of shirt." Sakura was startled after Suo's revelation. Damned!

"Why are you blushing so much Sakura?" As soon as Nirei finished speaking, Sakura glared at him with a red face.

"All of you, please protect the town.." Umemiya lowered his voice. Sakura looked up, his eyebrows slowly relaxing.

"The name they gave us it Bofurin. The chime of the wind breaker. Live up to that name...protect the people, the things the memories..."

"Protecting all that is important to me. That is the only rule here."

"Yes, sir!!" All students said in unison. Nirei was still sitting next to him, seeing Sakura's arm move and stuff it into his pocket. He suddenly remembered the heavy bruises on that arm and looked up at Sakura worriedly. "Sakura, your arm..."

Nirei thought he was dizzy, did he just see Sakura smiling??

The school speakers turned off after Hiragi's final scolding, and the students began to talk to each other. Sakura breathed out, memories of those first days replaying continuously in him.

[Why don't you just die?!]

Huh? Why did he suddenly notice that line that was crossed out?

Sakura flusteredly raised his hand to cover mouth, his stomach was boiling, it felt like Sakura was about to vomit. His chest hurt, his whole body shivered as a strange memory of a man holding a dirty ashtray towards him-

"Hey, guys don't you two need to get along now?" Suo interrupted that stream of memories, he stood between Sugishita and Sakura and made an example with both of his hands. Suo paused for a moment to look at Sakura before saying: "....That's right, why don't you two shake hands? to settle this." Very youthful.

Sakura winced and exhaled, the pain had completely disappeared but the disgusting feeling in his throat was still there.

"Since you're the one who started it first, you'll reconcile, right?' Suo smiled. Sakura shyly avoided his eyes. "And Sugishita - kun, if he heard about you fighting in class." Suo turned to Sugishita. "Who knows what he will say?"

Sugishita and Sakura grimaced in unison, the students in the class worriedly saw the obvious tension on their faces. In the end, Sakura was still the one to give first because he was the one who started anyway. Sugishita opened his eyes wide, then frowned, looked away and also raised his hand to shake hands with Sakura.

Seeing that they were willing to reconcile, them were also secretly relieved, especially Nirei. And then those two idiots flexed their muscles to squeeze each other's hands.

"Ah, how nice." Suo said.

What is nice about this?

This body's arm strength is not as good as the real Sakura's, so he and Sugishita are evenly matched, not to mention Sakura's arm still hurts.

Nirei nervously grabbed his arm. "Your hand is very swollen Sakura."

Sakura looked down at his hand. Even though the sleeve covered most of it, he could still see the purple skin spreading up to his wrist. Sugishita also saw it, he stopped his hand with a confused look on his face.

"Don't you feel any pain?..." Nirei asked gently as he wrapped the bandage on him hand.

"It's not that much of a pain." Sakura replied and received an ominous look from Nirei.

Whap!!

Smack!!

"Sakuraaa!!" Nirei screamed in panic when he saw his friend fall to the floor. He tried to bend down to help, but the students in the class pushed him away and stood around Sakura still growling and annoyed.

"That's amazing, you actually beat Sugishita!"

"The two hits just now were super crazy!"

"You're the one who single-handedly weighed a bunch of people yesterday, right?"

"Heh, really?!"

"That's right, my grandparents saw it yesterday!"

They patted his head, put their arms around Sakura's shoulders, and excitedly discussed the battle they had watched. Of course, this situation cannot be avoided. Sakura grumbled at the laughter of her classmates.

[I wonder what human body temperature is like? How silly.]

Human body temperature...

It's warmer than you... and I thought it was.

"Hey, you guys!!" Enomoto opened the door and shouted loudly into class 1-1 to attract them. "Get out. Quick."

The attention on Enomoto caused the students in the class to not notice Sakura's face. Then class 1-1 followed Enomoto down to the schoolyard with his annoyed voice, and then Hiragi's eyes. According to the past, they still had to divide into groups to patrol the neighborhood.

Sugishita and Sakura must be on the same team according to Umemiya's orders. Now that he thought about it, Sakura was sure he knew about their fight in class. Who the hell dares to tell him?

"Did you guys really fight in class?" Hiragi sighed and glanced over his shoulder at them. Sakura didn't answer, looked at the roadside restaurant, Sugishita also didn't say anything.

"You two." He frowned uncomfortably, Sakura and Sugishita didn't look at him. Suo and Nirei giggled as Hiragi glared at the two people above.

After that, they had to help the people repaint the walls. Sakura's paint job is still uneven. He was irritated and grumbled, squeezing hard. Nirei looked. "Don't be too harsh, Sakura..."

[I must be stronger! must be stronger!!]

...

...Why does he feel like those words aren't exactly a diary?

"Sakura."

Sakura blinked and looked up. Suo looked at him and smiled, handing the cake over.

Must be stronger.

He took the cake and slowly followed them.

Must be stronger.

[You're alone. You only have yourself.]

There was a teenager sitting in the corner of the kitchen, crumpling a notebook in his hand.

He tried to raise his bruised arm to wipe his face, but the more he wiped, the more he couldn't control his tears. The only small whimper in the quiet house woke up the stray cat at the window. It looked up at the child trembling with a pen. Through the faint moonlight, it saw that the outline had many spelling errors and a series of crossed out lines.

[weird.]

[Freak.]

[Useless.]

[Scary.]

He snorted and tried to read the words again.

A Five years old child is learning to read using the words outsiders call him.

"Hey, Stop there!!"

Hiragi was screaming, Nirei opened his eyes wide, turned pale and shouted towards Hiragi. The student in front tripped and slid down. Sugishita moved, Sakura removed his hands from pockets.

Doosh---!

Must be stronger.

Nirei stammered, Suo smiled and Hiragi frowned in confusion. The student jumped up and looked bewildered at the two backs standing out to protect him. The guy who had just chased him lay still on the ground.

Sakura and Sugishita did not look at each other, turned their eyes in different directions and did not hear Hiragi and Nirei panicking behind them.

The two guys accompanying him sarcastically poked at the kicked guy, but then both startledly backed away to make room for a more terrifying guy.Togame Jo, with his lazy, slow movements, recognized them after Hiragi spoke.

At that moment, the guy fell, Saruwatari growled and stood up, only to be hit in the head with a bottle by Togame, followed by fists right in the face.

Must be stronger.

The violence he brought startled them. Suo blinked, from looking at Togame to Sakura who just turned his head away. He noticed that Sakura was not surprised by the pressure from the deputy leader of the Shishitoren gang. "Sakura, where are you going?"

"Thirsty." Sakura replied, but Suo could see that he wasn't moving quickly.

Hiragi heard this and turned to scold him: "That brat, where are you going after causing trouble?!" Sakura completely ignored him.

"Heh~you're really interesting." Togame tilted his head. "I've never seen you before. Why did you leave so quickly? Can't you stand this scene?" He grabbed Saruwatari's hair.

Must be stronger.

Sakura stopped, turned his head and and rolled his eyes. He and Togame had been friends since the Shishitoren match back then, and Sakura knew how to provoke Togame just like he used to tease Sakura. He turned.

“I just think it's bullshit that you value only strength.”

Chapter Text

"You were never in their lives before, but when you arrived, they trusted and accepted you, and yet you dragged them through this with you." Endo let out harsh words with disgusting pleasure.

He felt suffocated, Endo's words were clinging to Sakura like hungry water snakes clinging to his legs, snaking around and constantly advising him to let go of his friends.

Are they worth this to him?

No.

They are not worth it.

Sakura was afraid. He was afraid to let go, afraid to sink into it again.

Endo's laughter did not stop.

His legs were pressing heavily on Sakura's chest, slowly taking all him breath away.

Thump.

Thump.

Thump.

Thump!

"Sakura!!"

Sakura blinked and looked at Nirei and Suo standing next to him. Nirei looked very worried, he had a lot of food in his hand.

Cake and fruit?... that's right, he was taken to the infirmary by Suo and Nirei for hand examination after they left from the meeting with Togame.

______

Togame blinked then narrowed his eyes, threw Saruwatari aside and did not forget to take the Shishitoren uniform shirt, "Heh~" He slung the two-color jacket over his shoulder, "The wind is so strong, I don't understand what to say but..."

"It's so annoying."

A cold feeling touched the back of their neck. Sakura turned his gaze towards Hiragi, who was in a defensive position with his face wrinkled in discomfort.

Not paying attention to him, Togame pushed down his glasses, squinted his eyes: "Oh, you have a strange tuft of hair. It looks quite interesting, like an ant."

ants??

"Ants?!" Sakura shouted angrily, Nirei reacted and held him back. While Sakura was actually about to hit someone, last time his old hairstyle called him othello, now what the hell is an ant?!! That mean him small and weak??

Satisfied with Sakura's harsh attitude, Togame giggled and put on his Shishitoren shirt, see them next time.

"Damn, he was still so annoying at first." Sakura muttered, showing disgust at Togame's way of talking. Even in his previous life, if Togame had used that gesture to tease him, Sakura would have frowned in displeasure.

"Oh God we're dead..." Nirei muttered, he confusedly grabbed Sakura and Sugishita's shirts. "What the hell did you two do?! That was starting a war, starting a war!!"

Sakura and Sugishita both tried to pretend not to look into Nirei's frightened eyes. Suo patted his back to calm Nirei. "Really, I'm a bit late." He then turned his eyes to the direction they were both looking at. "But when I look at him, I feel lucky that I'm not as fast as you guys."

Hiragi took out a bunch of medicine.

"H-Hiragi...it seems like you overdosed." Nirei blinked in worry and surprise, Hiragi stuffed those scary pills into his mouth. He covered his mouth. "Oh god...what was he drinking?"

"...Gaston 10 Stomach Medicine" Sakura answered him and quickly glanced at Sugishita who was looking at he and then slowly frowned with suspicion. He glared back. "What?"

"Gaston 10?!" Nirei turned completely excited as he took out his notebook and wrote it down. Sakura and Sugishita ignored him and turned to glare at each other, while Suo curiously looked down at Nirei's notebook.

"I should have been the first to act." Hiragi slumped his shoulders and turned to the student, unable to avoid the surprised looks from them. "Sorry guys."

"Hiragi..." Nirei said. 

Sakura silently looked towards where Togame had left.

The student stood up to follow Hiragi. Suo raised his hand to support the boy's body as soon as he leaned down.

"T-thank you."

Suo nodded. Hiragi sighed. "Let's go back to school first. Sasaki, you should come with us."

"Everyone go ahead, we have to take Sakura to get her hand checked again." Suo continued right after his words and received a raised eyebrow from they senior. He leaned towards Sakura. "Sakura's hand was seriously injured."

"That's right, do you still feel pain in your hand Sakura?" Nirei put the notebook away and turned to the startled Sakura.

Originally intending to let everyone forget his injury, Sakura kept his hands in pockets  since arriving at the schoolyard. Even when painting the wall, he pulled down his inner sleeves and kept his hands as low as possible so no one could see. So as soon as Suo finished speaking, Sakura hastily stuffed his hands deep intor pockets. Hiragi frowned at that action.

Sakura frowned, his discomfort becoming evident as they all looked at him. In the future, even though Sakura accepts them, he still avoids relying on anyone. One time he was stabbed to the point of bleeding. Not only did he not run for help, but he also clumsily stitched the wound himself, causing himself an infection and high fever.

Maybe for Sakura it was the best effort he could make to get used to their feelings, but for his friends they only felt more worried.

[I'm scared]

Those lines are bringing up the trauma of his past. His stomach hurt again, those lines were strangely familiar.

Just as Hiragi was about to speak, Sakura turned away. "I'm fine!'

Unfortunately, before he could take even half a step, Suo grabbed his arm and Nirei stopped him. Sakura rolled his eyes, the two of them ignored him, glanced at each other, exchanged glances, then each stood next to him and easily dragged Sakura away. Sugishita, Hiragi and the student watched as Sakura struggled and screamed in they grip.

Hiragi sighed and said to the student. "Let's go Sasaki, they'll know how to come back later."

The student nodded bewilderedly.

It was quite easy to convince Sakura to get tested, which Nirei was surprised to realize when he and Suo simply explained clearly that the arm would become heavier if they left alone. Sakura's face was quite reluctant to go with them but he was glad that him didn't resist anymore.

"How lucky, I thought he wouldn't go." Nirei exhaled. He and Suo walked behind Sakura, Nirei wondered why Sakura deliberately sped up to walk as far away from them as possible. He turned and sincerely said: "Thank you for your help,..." Nirei narrowed his eyes a bit and was about to say the name when Suo walked ahead of him.

"I'm Leonardo Dicaprio." Suo smiled. Nirei was confused while Sakura turned to look at him with strange eyes. God, why does this keep happening??

He can't believe he thought that bastard was a foreigner.

"Why are you blushing again, Sakura?" Sakura was startled by the curious eyes of his two friends. He turned away and hid his red face again.

Nirei blinked and turned back. "But...you are...Suou, right?'

"People often call me that." Suo chuckled, he noticed Nirei glancing at his blindfold, "By the way, this bandage is to seal an evil spirit in ancient China."

Nirei looked at he even more confused, and Sakura Looking at Suo like someone just insulted him. This was truly the worst joke, he could never forget Suo's laugh when he pretended to flip the blindfold to scare them.

Immediately, Sakura turned away and walked in front of them with a grimacing, red face. Leaving behind an awkward Nirei to run after and Suo still laughing about that joke.

The three of them walked on the street wearing Furin uniforms, everyone around them recognized them. Especially Sakura, seeing the boy keep grumbling as he walked by, he immediately brought the cake over: "You guys are here. Sakura, take some of this cake, I forgot to give it to you.

The couple put the cake bag in his hand, and then others gathered to give things to the three of them. Nirei looked quite confused by the situation.

Sakura looked at the bag cake, thinking he wouldn't be hungry anymore tonight.

"Sakura, do you need to hold some? Your hand is still injured." Nirei's worried words made everyone turn towards him. Sakura frowned.

"Sakura's arm still hurts?"

"Is it from the day you saved Kotoha?"

"Are you okay Sakura?"

"Can I see it?"

Everyone asked him worriedly. Sakura blushed at the concerned attitude of the people around him.

"You're too weak."

Sakura's body stiffened.

Huh?

"Trash."

" weird."

"Stupid."

"I should have broken your legs."

The woman growled and knocked the child down the basement stairs.

She is that boy's mother but she has never loved him.

The child looked at the pile of black coal he had just fallen into. Its entire body is covered in black, the blood has also turned dark, even the white side of its hair has also become black.

[That weird.]

The diary page was stained with black charcoal, partially covering the grammatically incorrect sentences.

...

"Sakura."

Sakura looked up at everyone standing around him with a worried look. "H-huh?" he unconsciously stammered.

"Sakura, you haven't answered anyone for five minutes." The man answered softly and received confused eyes from Sakura.

"Are you okay Sakura?" Now everyone was even more worried while Sakura didn't understand what just happened.

What the hell just happened?

What are those recurring memories?

Did he also have this memory? but it felt like his thoughts at that time were different from Sakura's.

In the end, what happened that made him go in a different direction than Sakura?

"Everyone, please don't pressure him too much. Just let us take care of this matter."

Suo's words interrupted Sakura's thoughts. Now Nirei was carefully approaching him, timidly looking like just one strange word would be enough to knock him down, Suo stood in front of them to talk to the people. Their actions upset him, but Sakura knew he couldn't speak up anymore.

No matter how worried everyone was, under Suo's persuasion, they had no choice but to force them. Most people turned around to remind him a few words before leaving.

This situation took a lot of time, Suo let out a gasp and turned towards Sakura who was frowning at him.

"Are you okay?" Suo smiled gently. Sakura didn't respond, turned away.

Haha, Suo smiled resignedly at the still flustered Nirei.

After that incident, Sakura was completely silent the whole way. Nirei wanted to speak up many times, but seeing that face, he pursed lips

When examining his hand, he remained silent. When facing the doctor, he suddenly frowned in discomfort. Even though he still cooperated, everyone could see that his eyes were wide open and he maintained a defensive posture.

The injury is not too serious, Sakura just needs to limit vigorous exercise for a while to recover.

"Right, have you meet... any doctors?"

"What?" Hearing this word, he frowned in bewilderment.

They are currently sitting separately in the clinic. Suo and Nirei were not allowed in because the doctor said he wanted to talk to him privately.

"I heard your friend say you didn't answer anyone for five minutes just now." The doctor carefully explained and then asked: "Did you hear them calling you at that time?"

Sakura pursed his lips and shook head.

"Okay..." The doctor's voice slowly lowered. Sakura had never had this kind of conversation with a doctor, so he found this strange.

"Do you... want to say anything?"

Sakura raised his eyebrows. Why does he want to say something?

Seeing that reaction the doctor sighed. "Do you mind if I ask more?"

____________

"Sakura's actions are sometimes very strange."

Suo blinked and turned to Nirei who was walking next to him with a pensive face, it seemed like he didn't realize what he had just said.

It took a few minutes for Nirei to realize that he had been thinking about what he was saying. He quickly turned around and said: "I-it's not like I was following him." 

Suo just smiled as if encouraging him to add, Nirei pursed his lips, "I just met Sakura this morning..." He looked down. "Every once in a while Sakura will unconsciously not look at anything. When he talks he always looks like hiding something. Sometimes he even mumbles..."

Suo nodded. As expected, he was not the only one who noticed this. While in class, he saw Sakura's arm raised to cover his pale face. From the actions that followed, they could see many strange problems from that new friend.

He was curious why this friend suddenly appeared here.

"Sakura." Nirei passed him and walked towards Sakura who was sitting outside with his head thrown back, his eyes and hair all covered by his hood. Even though they both came to his side, even if Nirei called out again, he didn't react.

"Sakura?" Nirei called again.

No reaction.

"S-Sakura?"

...

It's like that again, Sakura is silent again.

Nirei looked at Suo with a worried face. Suo looked back at him, not sure what to do next.

"Sakura."

Nirei shook Sakura's shoulder.

"Sakura!"

His motionless body twitched, Sakura blinked and looked up at them. Those bewildered eyes slowly lowered. Blinking again, Sakura returned to his normal state.

"Let's go." He stood up as if nothing had happened. Once again, leaving the two of them there, walked straight away without looking back.

Suo and Nirei looked at each other and carefully walked next to Sakura.

Sakura wiped charcoal powder on the floor. No, to be precise, he was wiping away my blackened blood. the boy turned its heterochromatic eyes to the broken mirror nearby, looking at his hair and face covered in black charcoal.

The charcoal layer only makes the hair gray but does not turn it black.

But he felt really weird at that time.

" Are you guys just coming back now?" 

As soon as they entered the school gate, Hiragi was already there waiting for them. He frowned and looked up from the clock. "What took you guys so long?"

"We ran into some trouble on the way." Suo briefly explained just as Nirei was about to tell the truth. Hiragi raised his eyebrows

"Fine, quickly follow me." He sighed, glanced at Sakura, and led them away.

The group of four people went up the stairs.

Sakura looked down at each step he climbed. He had never paid attention to these stairs, nor had he ever seen anything strange about them, but...now he couldn't help but notice them.

The ladder is not made entirely of cement, so if you fall and hit your head, it won't cause serious injury.

It's not worn out or old or covered in paint and charcoal.

Thump

Sakura was startled and looked at Hiragi who had just patted his shoulder, he rolled his eyes forward for him to follow. Sakura looked in his direction.

Oh, they've arrived.

As soon as the door opened, the air was sucked in. Hiragi stepped out first, the strong wind blew him hood down. Suo and Nirei looked around admiringly.

Sakura breathed out, his pupils wavering as he looked up.

Umemiya looked up at him, smiling and waving.

Chapter Text

[March 14th

He 

Hi

I'm not used to writing at such length. Did I make a spelling mistake?

Mom scolded me when I woke up in the hosptal hospital. This word was hard to write, luckily the nurse showed me.

Mom said I was useless because I wasted her money.

The kind nurse told me that I had been asleep for two days.]

Sakura's arms shook as Umemiya turned here and began to grumble about the mismatch between the rows of trees. Sugishita stood hunched over beside him nodding and listening, and Hiragi was getting annoyed that Umemiya wasn't listening to him.

Nirei blinked and tilted his head in confusion, "Wow, they're so chaotic."

Agreed. Sakura snorted, still trying to keep his obvious trembling in his pocket.

Umemiya pouted, waving his hand as if to shoo Hiragi away. Hiragi winced, almost shouting at him, startling the student and unconsciously backing away from them.

The student's back hit Sakura's arm, and Sakura stiffened, suppressing another full-body tremor that was beginning to attack him. A strange wave of nausea pushed down Sakura's stomach. He winced, feeling useless with this overly sensitive body.

"Ah-ah, I'm sorry!"

Sakura swallowed them back, exhaled and glanced at the teenager. They looked at each other for a few minutes, Sakura raising his eyebrows and the boy startled again. They looked at each other in confusion, and finally Sakura hesitantly nodded as a confirmation.

The boy then breathed a sigh of relief, standing back beside him, trying to keep their shoulders only a few centimeters apart.

What the hell just happened?

"Eh, why's everyone here?" Umemiya finally noticed. Sugishita glanced at them, his eyes meeting Sakura's. They both frowned, and glared at each other in annoyance.

"Hey, hey, come here quickly." Umemiya seemed to be the only one who didn’t notice the silent battle between his two juniors, inviting them to come closer to his new vegetable patch.

Sakura watched him excitedly introduce each vegetable, a small smile appearing on his lips before quickly disappearing as if it had ever existed. Sakura exhaled, glancing at the student who was hesitating to interject because Umemiya was talking too much.

He thought back to their situation just now.

The way the boy with sparkling eyes looked at him, or the way he chose to stand near Sakura and now was sitting next to him.

…

Tsk, this world is so annoying.

“Hey.”

The student hunched his shoulders, turning to Sakura in confusion. Sakura glanced at Umemiya then back, signaling the boy. He blinked, it took a few minutes to understand what Sakura meant.

"Excuse me, please let me explain!"

Umemiya paused, put down the pepper in his hand, and turned around. He blinked, slightly surprised by the speed at which the boy was telling the story. Sakura propped his hands on the table, his fake gray eyes glanced away. He didn't notice, nor did he know that Suo had been watching him from beginning to end.

The student continued to talk, his face pale, whether from fear or lack of oxygen. When he glanced at Sakura and Sugishita, Sakura said nothing.

The story ended with gasps, and the student glanced back at Sakura. Sakura frowned, slightly annoyed by the way the kid kept looking at him as if seeking help.

It wasn't like that intris previous life.

Sakura has never been a trustworthy person in the eyes of others. His strange appearance and somewhat unpleasant personality are what make many people feel scared.

And... oh, right. Sakura wasn't in his true self.

Maybe that was why people were more friendly towards him.

"Sasaki..."

Sakura looked up. The student was startled and stammered because Umemiya knew his name. "H-how do you know my name?"

Sakura had wondered the same thing before, at that time he really didn't understand how Umemiya could know everything. Later Sakura learned that it wasn't that difficult.

Umemiya smiled, slightly bowing to appear clearly in the student's vision, "Thank you."

A familiar feeling began to flood Sakura's mind. He pursed his lips, eyes looking away.

"So how did they save you?"

"H-huh, ah, they blew off the guy with a kick..."

"With a kick!?"

Nirei looked at him, Sakura deliberately did not look back. Sugishita sat nearby, his face already covered in sweat. They deliberately avoided, deliberately pretended not to hear.

"Of course they'd be pissed about that!!"

Hiragi snorted.

Sakura exhaled, a small smile forming more clearly on his lips as he saw everyone's surprised looks directed at Umemiya. The nostalgia from the past or these never-changing personalities reminded Sakura of the old days, when he was still worried about everyone's kindness.

Suddenly, the sound of the phone ringing attracted everyone. They looked at Sakura, Sakura blinked and frowned as he took out his phone.

A strange phone number appeared on the screen, no name and only numbers. If he wasn't mistaken, the only one in his contacts was the weather forecast. Sakura intended to refuse the call, but as soon as his finger moved to the red button, it automatically stiffened.

[Father slapped me]

Sakura was confused by the strange uneasiness on his body, he slightly retracted his hand, hesitated, and then turned to answer the call.

Nirei and Suo glanced at each other, all of them kept quiet, polite enough to wait for Sakura to answer the phone. Nirei gulped, feeling nervous as Sakura at the other end of the table frowned.

Those gray eyes widened, Sakura suddenly stood up and walked away in a hurry. He ran away, leaving everyone looking at him with a confused look.

The last thing they heard was that anxious and panicked voice gradually disappearing behind the door.

He seemed to be in a hurry about something.

[Father and nerse nurse are talking]

Chouji excitedly took the speaker to the middle of Fuurin's yard. He lifted the speaker and grabbed the head of a member of the Fuurin gang with one hand. Chouji adjusted the speaker, set it to the loudest volume and then turned it up high.

"Hmm?" Chouji stopped, squinting his eyes as a member of the Fuurin rushed out of the school. He looks quite strange, is he new?

"Hey-"

The person directly ran past him, as if Chouji was invisible and could easily pass by at any time. Chouji turned his head, at the same time hearing the person's voice shouting, "P-please don't break the door!"

He squinted his eyes.

Hmm... never mind. He looked like he had something more important to do.

Sakura ran quickly, his fingers gripping the phone so tightly that they turned white, his lower lip trembling. He didn't know why he was so scared, but... but Sakura couldn't let this man enter that rented room.

[Father and the nurse are hugging each other

What are they do dong doing?]

Sakura's nails dug into the edge of the phone, the pain in his stomach made his face pale. Sakura didn't pay attention to anyone on the road, he just focused on the front, on the shabby and rotten apartment he was staying in.

Sakura didn't even notice that he had run past Togame or how all of Shishitoren could see him screaming, almost pleading into that phone.

The phone almost fell from his hand when Sakura stopped at the apartment he was staying in. The man standing in front of him apartment turned his head, his dull and lifeless eyes glancing at Sakura. The cigarette in his mouth and the bushy mustache moved.

Sakura's father smirked, "Oh, there you are."

[Father said told me not to tell Mom

But he didn't tell me not to say what]

"You're still using that dye, you weirdo."

The stench of tobacco, alcohol and sweat made Sakura's nose prickle, he unconsciously stepped back, unconsciously wincing.

This was Sakura's father, not his father. This was the man Sakura feared, not the man who hated his son he knew. He was Sakura's father, the man who had given Sakura her worst nightmares.

The strong, thick smell of tobacco wafted into Sakura's face, Sakura stepped back, covering his face. The man who was Sakura's father grabbed his face, forcing his to look up and into him eyes.

He smiled, showing his tarnished gold teeth and blowing cigarette smoke into Sakura's face. Sakura coughed violently, his eyes red and burning from them.

He cannot fight back. Every time that man laughed, his body would automatically shrink, tremble, and become weak to the point of nausea.

Sakura hated this, hated the weakness of this body that was affecting him. He gritted his teeth, his stiff and trembling fingers raised up, hesitating for a second before tightening his grip, swinging up and punching that man's face.

The man limped back, Sakura gasped, gasped, and ran up the stairs. He pulled the rotten door shut, shakingly locking it with a crude tool Sakura had never seen in his previous life.

The door made a loud banging sound, and Sakura stepped back, afraid that it would be broken open. He stumbled, holding onto the wall, eyes darting around in panic for something.

Loud banging sounds were heard along with the fierce and angry voice of Sakura's father. Sakura flinched, hand covering his mouth, and rushed into the bathroom.

He grabbed the toilet bowl, throwing up everything in his stomach. Sakura didn't know how long he had been collapsed next to the toilet, only that when he stopped, the banging outside had disappeared.

[I asked my mother about the nurse

I asked mother why father hugged nurse and not her

Shouldn't everyone hug their mother wives and me children?]

Sakura's head was aching terribly, the fears and memories of his body were sawing at his bleeding heart. It was like two lumps of clay, red and blue, mixed together and finally became one ugly, dirty color. The red was gone, the blue was gone too because everything of them had become one.

He remembered when he was young, when his classmates teased him about his appearance. His father ignored them, he didn't care about it and even got annoyed when Sakura tried to follow him.

Sakura clearly remembered how he blamed his son for his loss of position at work.

Sakura didn't know, nor did understand what his fault was in this.

[The nurse called me a weirdo]

Sakura pulled his knees up, his hands pressed tightly to his ears as the painful memories of both him and his body rang out at the same time. They screamed, clawing at his wounds.

Sakura could feel the weak tears flowing from his eyes, but he was not conscious enough, nor capable enough to wipe them away.

He clawed at his ears, his skin, trying to push away those words. His stomach ached, his head also buzzed with many piercing sounds. Many pains attacked Sakura, like thousands of needles piercing his skin. They were more painful than bruises, cuts, or even broken bones.

Sakura coughed out, not noticing that he had vomited again since then.

He closed his eyes dreamily, having fainted since then with his body still in the shape of a fetus and tense. His cold skin pressed against the damp bathroom floor, Sakura slowly let his arms fall limp, hi eyes closed and red, filled with tears.

...

The nurse sighed, tiredly walking after a hard day. She moved the medicine cart on the hospital corridor, glancing at the patient rooms as a daily habit.

Her eyes stopped at a patient room with the lights on and the door open. She tilted her head, looking in.

On the large bed was a small figure, trembling and covering his ears. The child mumbled something, sobbing and painful sounds echoed in the cold, empty room.

The nurse narrowed her eyes, pushed the medicine cart and left.

...

When Sakura woke up, it was already dark outside. He was disgusted by the vomit beside him, and weakly got up and washed himself. The dye color flowed down the drain, mixing with the red of blood.

Sakura walked out of the bathroom, glancing at Fuurin's uniform covered in blood, vomit, and drenched on the sink. He didn't think anything, didn't do anything and walked back to the futon.

The diary lay on top of the futon, silent and dull in color, just like Sakura now. Sakura was silent, and after a while, he let go of the wet towel around his neck and reached out to pick up the diary.

He opened it, skimming through the pages of the diary, and then stopped at one page.

[March 16th

Mom and father quarreled

Mother pushed father

Father shouted at Mom and left again

Mom turned to look at me, her eyes looked terrifying

Mom said it was because of me that they argued

What did I do wrong?]

Sakura sighed, running his fingers over the round yellow stains on the page. He rubbed the shaky handwriting as if he wanted to smooth it out.

No, kid. It wasn't your fault.

Sakura wanted to talk, wanted to sit down with that kid and then he and the boy could talk to each other, tell each other their own stories. About the pain that only they could understand.

A small, soft, yet painful smile bloomed on Sakura's lips. He closed the diary, neatly placing it in the box.

Sakura stood up, lightly mocking his own weakness.

[I want to eat with everyone!]

Me too, kid.

Don't worry, maybe I will make your story happier with what you deserve.

And then you will realize that you have missed out on more than you think, Sakura.

---

Sakura didn't plan on leaving the inn today, especially since the Fuurin uniform wasn't dry yet. But he couldn't stay either, because Shishitoren and Fuurin were supposed to have a decisive battle at noon today.

Sakura tilted his head and thought for a long time, the battle would still happen, right? With Chouji's personality, there was no way he would change the day.

He lowered his head, staring at his few clothes, then at the Fuurin uniform hanging outside.

Sakura frowned and stood up, he walked out to the balcony and took the clothes in.

After a while, Sakura left the inn with his black hair and pile of damp clothes, his gray eyes looking around as if confirming something before quietly leaving. As he left, Sakura kept staring at the pile of cigarette butts thrown in front of the inn door.

...

Kotoha had another bad morning, yesterday Umemiya and the others came to make a ruckus at her shop because of their meeting with Shishitoren. Honestly, Kotoha wasn't interested in it, but she noticed that everyone was talking about that guy named Sakura.

Nirei said that Sakura had left while they were talking, he looked panicked. Umemiya even said that Shishitoren's side was also wondering about Sakura, they were wondering why Sakura looked so scared.

This was really worrying.

When Kotoha returned to her shop, she saw Sakura in a nearby laundry and drying shop. Sakura sat on the chair, his back bent and his hands between his legs. He was waiting for his clothes to dry.

Kotoha didn't care about that, but she became worried when she saw Sakura's arm. Along the part of his arm that could be seen from behind, from inside the sleeve of Sakura's T-shirt, there were white bandages wrapped around it. They looked so new and perfect that it looked as if the person who wrapped them had done it hundreds of times.

"Sakura!?" When Kotoha realized it, she went into the store and called his name.

Sakura was a little startled, and instinctively stuttered, "W-what?"

Kotoha frowned, there were a few small scratches on Sakura's ear, his skin was pale and the tip of his nose was red from the cold. He looked as if someone had just beaten him up.

"What the hell happened to you?"

Sakura frowned in confusion.

"That wound..."

Sakura looked down at his arm, a flash of anger flashed across his eyes before being replaced by an annoyed look. Sakura sighed, "Nothing."

Kotoha didn't believe it, she raised her eyebrows and crossed her arms, "Do you expect me to believe that nothing happened?"

Sakura glanced at her but didn't say anything, he lowered his head and watched the dryer spin. Kotoha was annoyed by that attitude, she was about to scold him when Sakura suddenly interrupted, making Kotoha stunned.

"Is the battle between Fuurin and Shishitoren still happening?"

Kotoha tilted her head slightly, she was both confused and worried that Sakura had used another topic to avoid his problem. Besides, what the heck is he talking about?

"What battle?"

Now it was Sakura's turn to be confused, he frowned, "Shishitoren and Fuurin, you don't know?"

"When? they're just talking." Kotoho shook her head, she didn't remember the others mentioning any battle.

"What?"

Sakura's surprised face was strangely simple, his eyebrows furrowed between worry and confusion. He bent down, his hand reaching up to pull his hair and Kotoha could see the scratch on his ear more clearly. Sakura muttered.

"How could things be different?"

Kotoha still didn't understand what he was talking about.

Chapter Text

Sakura was still a bit confused since he was dragged to the cafe by Kotoha. It's still early, it's almost seven o'clock in the morning, and stores are usually just starting to open now. Kotoha stood behind the bar, unsettlingly silent since Sakura had refused to tell her what had happened.

A strange sense of deja vu filled Sakura. He gulped, slightly startled when Kotoha placed the plate of Omurice down in front of him.

Kotoha stared at him, hereyes narrowing as she slowly pulled her hand back and turned to get the spoon.

“There.” Kotoha placed the spoon on the plate. Sakura glanced at her as she went to get the cup, he hesitated, then picked up the spoon. Kotoha returned with the water, she set it down next to the plate of Omurice.

Sakura scooped a piece of Omurice into his mouth. At first, before he started eating, he didn't feel anything, but now, the moment the rice melted in his mouth, hunger began to appear. Sakura scooped up more pieces, eating them quickly as if he hadn't eaten anything yesterday.

All Sakura ate yesterday was the bread the people stuffed into his hands, and Sakura vomited it all out. So it's true that Sakura hasn't eaten anything yet.

"Why are you holding the spoon so strangely?"

Sakura stopped, looked up, and frowned at Kotoha's question. Kotoha looked down at the almost empty Omurice, his fingers tapping on the thin wood and making some sounds.

"You know..." Kotoha frowned, she took a spoon and held it in a normal way. Something that even a three-year-old should know. "Usually, people hold it like this."

Sakura blinked, frowning slightly with a strange feeling of embarrassment. He was feeling confused. In Sakura's previous life, no one wondered about his pawning problem. Some people noticed, some people wanted to remind him, but in the end they all ignored it.

His friends never tried to correct Sakura's habits, so Sakura didn't know that he was using it wrongly.

His ignorance made Sakura think that holding the spoon incorrectly was like a hobby.

"Isn't that a hobby?" Sakura tilted his head slightly, his fingers unconsciously tightening around the cool iron material of the spoon.

"A hobby? That's a basic skill, Sakura." Kotoha blinked, thinking that Sakura was joking, so she replied a little awkwardly. Basic skills also count as hobbies?

Sakura blinked, his eyebrows furrowed. He didn't reply to Kotoha anymore, continuing to lower his head to finish eating the remaining Omurice.

"Actually, I think it could also be a hobby?" Kotoha tapped her chin, thinking seriously, "Kaji also often holds his chopsticks incorrectly."

Sakura looked at her, Kotoha blinked and realized, "Ah, have you met Kaiji yet?"

Kotoha lowered her hand and adjusted it to the height she thought Kaji was. Sakura blinked, he looked at Kotoha describing Kaji, tilting his head slightly.

Kaji often holds the chopsticks wrong? Sakura had never noticed that in the second year senior.

Sakura frowned slightly, he picked up the cup of water and looked down at it. Sakura's silhouette was reflected on the clear water, his fake gray eyes closed. Sakura exhaled, lifted the cup of water and drank.

Sakura's slightly burning throat trembled with the cool feeling of the water, he almost choked on the water because of that hasty drinking action. Sakura coughed slightly, using his sleeve to wipe his mouth instinctively.

The small cup was made of glass, transparent and very fragile. Sakura stared at the cup.

The image of blood stains appearing before his vision, the sharp pain from his head and the sticky little fingers pushing against the glass made Sakura tense. He swallowed his saliva.

"Can I have more water?"

Kotoha paused, Sakura looked up, hesitantly adding, "...Please?"

Sakura's voice was hoarse and weak, Kotoha's eyes were a bit confused. She pursed her lips, drew a small smile and comforted, "Okay, let... let me get you something better?"

Kotoha turned and went to get the things, Sakura sat alone at the bar, closed his eyes, inhaled and exhaled slowly. Suo had taught Sakura how to calm down when he panicked. It didn't always help, but at least it was enough to get Sakura back to his senses.

[Mom keeps chasing me away and pulling me back

Mom is so scary

Mom keeps hurting me

I'm so scared]

...

No matter where he was, Sakura was always the outcast. No matter how hard he tried, how well-behaved or how indifferent he was, in everyone's eyes, Sakura was always the weird kid.

He was like that and would never change.

...

A little past seven thirty, people started to flock to the cafe. Umemiya barged in like he always did, he lunged at Kotoha and slid to the floor immediately when she dodged.

Kohata rolled her eyes, sniffed, and gathered up the dirty dishes and took them away. Suo and Nirei came in right after him, they lit up immediately when they saw Sakura.

"Sakura!"

Sakura was startled right where he was sitting, he almost fell off the chair when Nirei rushed towards him. Sakura stammered, "W-what?"

"You made us so worried!!" Nirei hugged Sakura tightly, Sakura blushed and pushed him away. Suo and the others walked over, smiling softly.

"We're all worried about you, Sakura." Suo said.

"That's right!! You scared us so much yesterday!" Nirei let go of Sakura and nervously grabbed his friend's shoulder. Sakura frowned, Nirei was startled, stammering and pulling his hand away from Sakura's shoulder, "Ah! I didn't grab it hard. D-did you just get hurt?"

Sakura stroked his shoulder, grumbling softly. The scratch isn't deep, so why does it hurt so much?

"Are you hurt?" Nirei asked back, anxiously moving around Sakura like a frightened chick. Sakura glanced at him, Suo and the others behind him were all looking at him, even Kotoha who had just returned to the bar was waiting for Sakura's answer.

Sakura wanted to lie, wanted to run away, wanted to avoid those looks, but he couldn't move, as if vines were wrapped tightly around Sakura's feet. He pursed his lips.

Everyone in Makochi always encouraged Sakura to open up to them, they didn't force him. To everyone, Sakura was like a stray cat, hard to approach and hard to get them to open up.

Similar to many stray cats in the city, it often takes patience and kindness for those cats to trust them. Sakura was the same, he had started to open up to everyone.

It was hard to do, but in the end, Sakura learned that he was still worthy of love.

Sakura bit the inside of his cheek, fighting back the cowardice and shame inside him. Everyone looked at him, Sakura mumbled back, "...A little."

They blinked, there was an awkward silence as Sakura shyly avoided their eyes. He wasn't used to telling the truth, he tried very hard to say it like that.

"A little?" One person repeated.

...

Okay, that's enough.

"It's just- n-nothing!" Sakura jumped up, pushed Nirei aside, and hurriedly ran out of the shop. He left, ignoring the confused calls of his friends.

[December 30th

It's cold today

Mom and father seem to be arguing again

I don't know what they're talking about

Mom looks like she's crying and hitting father

Father looks upset

I can't hear them from out here]

Sakura walked a little further away from the cafe and stopped, rubbing the back of his neck, still feeling a little embarrassed by the situation.

Normally people would scold him if they knew Sakura hid her injuries, Sakura didn't want that. He still wasn't completely used to those worried looks.

Sakura sighed, looking down at the top of his shoes and thinking to himself, thinking about why it was always so hard for him to accept kindness.

"Um... Sakura-san?"

Sakura looked up, in front of him was the student they saved yesterday, if he not mistaken, his name was Sasaki right?

Sakura wasn't very good at remembering people's names.

"I'm sorry for bothering you." The boy waved his hand in confusion, his face was worried but his sincere gaze was strangely sparkling. "I didn't get to thank you yesterday."

Sakura blinked, Sasaki rubbed the back of his neck, he hesitated a bit then looked up, curled his eyes and said, "So I came back here today. Thank you for saving me yesterday!"

Sakura didn't know how to respond, he was too surprised by the different situations that were happening in this life. Damn, his brain is on fire. It took a few minutes for Sakura to hesitate, "Okay?..."

The student smiled brightly then suddenly realized, "Ah, I'm sorry! I have to go to school!"

When the student walked past him, Sakura stopped, he turned around and pulled back Sasaki's hand. Sasaki looked at him. Sakura gulped, this was his chance to find out what happened between Fuurin and Shishitoren.

"Yesterday..." Sakura stopped, adjusted her voice to be less weak, and tried again.

"What happened yesterday?"

...

It was snowing heavily, everyone happily enjoyed the last days of the old year together.

They walked by, laughing and joking with each other. The street food stalls were inviting, the game areas were crowded with people. The small sales areas were filled with couples. Groups of families walked around the city together in colorful, eye-catching Kimonos.

Amidst the crowd jostling on the street full of lights, a small figure tried to squeeze through. The boy entered the New Year's festival, his eyes wide and sparkling.

In the moments when couples and families were together, occasionally a child wearing thin clothes ran past them.

When there were still a few minutes left until the new year, a child sitting on his father's shoulder saw a strange boy on a tree. Fireworks exploded in the sky.

The child blinked, almost drawn to the boy. That two-toned hair had a few leaves stuck to it, the different-colored eyes were wide open, sparkling like thousands of stars. A bright and innocent smile bloomed on that small face, the small fangs sticking out, mischievously appearing after each excited gasp of the boy.

The fireworks ended. They left.

That was the day Sakura smiled the brightest in his childhood.

...

Sakura frowned and looked down at the ground, he didn't know why just because of such a simple reason, Shishitoren and Fuurin temporarily ceased fighting. And that reason was that he, Umemiya and Choiji had agreed to respect Sakura's opinion first.

Sakura didn't think he needed that. Looking back, Sakura can see that people's actions in this life always seem to be more cautious than he used to know.

That... was really annoying.

He didn't need those people to worry about him because it made Sakura feel like he was weak. He could also drag people into trouble like Endo said, after all, that bastard's words weren't wrong sometimes.

Everyone always said they didn't mind, but Sakura knew that many times it was his impulsive, stubborn emotions that affected them quite a bit.

He knew that but they didn't give him the chance to apologize.

[January 1st

Mom's mad at father again

Luckily they didn't know I wasn't home last night

Those things exploding in the sky were really pretty

I heard people call them fireworks]

Sakura was born from what people call bad luck, he was abandoned by his family, kicked out to live in a warehouse. Watching them live through the window every day with a boy's desire to be loved.

Since he was little, Sakura always had to apologize to others, whether it was not his fault or he just wanted to help, in the end everything always ended with him having to apologize.

There were many times when Sakura looked up at the sky, he felt grateful for what everyone here tried to do for him. They treated Sakura like a normal person, valued and loved him.

For an abandoned child, this was truly his greatest luck.

The road had begun to have many people passing by, Sakura put his hands in his pockets, he looked at the children running past him. One of the children recognized him, she stopped, smiled brightly and waved, "Good morning, Sakura - niisan!"

The little girl hugged her bag and ran after her friends after that bright smile, the other kids also quickly waved at him. Sakura blinked.

"Oh, Sakura! Have you had breakfast yet? If you haven't, then eat some bread. I just baked it!"

Sakura turned his head to the father and son pair selling bread. They curled their eyes, inviting him to come in and enjoy the new batches of hot, golden bread. Inside, the mother poked her head out to look. She saw Sakura and smiled as she brought the batch of cakes out of the oven, "Would you like to try this bread my family just made?"

The morning sun shone on the corner of the bakery, the sweet aroma of flour spread throughout the streets of Makochi. Sakura turned his feet, walking towards the bakery.

A small, adorable smile curved up, Sakura accepted the family's offer.

"J-just one."

The three of them giggled and shoved a few more types of bread into his hand.

-----

Every year is a new age, children get taller and bigger, adults get older and shorter. But sometimes many things will never change.

Trauma, memories and fears are things that always follow the unlucky people. They are bound by it, have to live with it, have to endure it.

It's not easy for children to live in their memories, people keep telling them to ignore the past. They say it's not difficult to let go of the past, but they don't know how difficult it has been to survive until now.

No matter how hard they try, the memories are still there, always clearly imprinted in the mature mind of a child.

For doctors in the psychiatric department, they often feel sad for the victims of memories and trauma. All they can do is listen and give advice to those unfortunate fates.

There was a student who once heard her teacher talk about a special patient he met on the street.

He was a child with a very special appearance, and it was that boy's specialness that made the people around him loathe him. He was distant from everyone, fierce and vulnerable like a kitten.

But the child was so kind, he still tried to help everyone even when everyone hated and feared him.

-----

Sakura bit into the bread, his gray eyes glancing at the wind chimes on the walls of the city. His short black hair blew in the wind, and he bowed his head in silence.

A few minutes later Sakura returned to the street carrying the bag of bread, trying to ignore the cigarettes and beer bottles thrown away in the nearby landfill.

They were the same as the cigarette butts in front of Sakura's house.

...

The young couple walked hand in hand. They exchanged warm smiles, soft looks that almost shone where they stood.

The neighbors were jealous of their love.

In a nearby warehouse, next to the only window of the small warehouse was a child. The child showed his confusion and fear as he stared at the couple.

The couple left, and the boy slowly emerged. He blinked repeatedly, his lips trembling and stammering.

Everyone who looked on felt jealous of their love, but only one child, their son, felt very scared. Only the boy knew about his parents' arguments and fights.

He was the only one who had to witness their violence, the toxic relationship they had for each other.

....

[January 2

Mom and father Are Crazy]

Chapter Text

[January 16th

Mom and father are celebrating something

They left last night

I'm so hungry

Maybe I'll steal something on the way to school]

When his friends searched for Sakura, they found him in a small alley with a group of cats. Sakura sat up with his knees drawn up, his bandaged fingers gently brushing through the stray cats' soft fur. They purred contentedly, rubbing their heads against Sakura's palm, wanting him to pet them more.

The cats in Makochi were usually wary of strangers, but with Sakura, they knew he wasn't a threat from the moment he entered the place. Sakura remembered Nirei once told him that animals were sensitive to emotions, Sakura didn't think it was worth paying attention to until the cats started gathering around him more. He and they used to sit together for hours when it was pouring rain.

"What a surprise, do you like cats Sakura?" Nirei opened the notebook, curiously squatting down next to Sakura and asked.

Sakura was a little startled by their appearance, he frowned and backed away unconsciously, "What the hell are you guys doing here?"

Nirei took notes attentively, remembering each cat that was close to Sakura. Suo walked to their side, smiling slightly, "Umemiya told us to find you."

"Find me?" Sakura raised his eyebrows. Right now he just wanted to be alone, the fact that Fuurin and Shishitoren postponed the battle because of him was enough to confuse Sakura and make him distant from them.

Sakura feels lost, he is in a version of himself, meets friends who are not like them and feels confused with everything. Sakura wanted to wonder, wanted to scream why he was here.

He wanted to know why he died and came back to life here.

Wanted to know why death wasn't the end for him.

Sakura felt jealous of the child who used to be in this body. Why can he go so easily but him can't?

Why does life always lock Sakura's ankles as if it will never give him a choice.

Sakura's questions will never have answers.

"Shishitoren will be back today, so Umemiya wanted to ask your opinion first." Suo said, still keeping his signature mysterious smile.

Sakura frowned, almost ready to stand up and leave again. Instead Sakura asked, "Why do you guys need my opinion?"

The two of them stopped, turning to look at Sakura with strange looks. The curve on Suo's lips gradually faded, Nirei frowned slightly as if he didn't believe Sakura would ask that question. Sakura was confused, "What?"

"What do you mean, Sakura?" Nirei asked, tilting his head and then smiling slightly, "Of course we need your opinion."

Sakura was silent, Suo narrowed his eyes and smiled again, "Especially when you're the one who kicked the Shishitoren member."

"It's obvious that he was the one who attacked first!" Sakura screamed, instinctively standing up like a cat with its fur ruffled, then his whole face turned red as he realized his overreaction. Nirei chuckled, writing something down in his notebook.

He closed the notebook and stood up, smiling brightly. “Let’s go, Sakura!” Suo behind him, hands still behind his back.

The morning sunlight gently shone on their hair and backs, both smiling, both facing him as they always did. While Nirei was like the sun, ready to reach out and shine down on his dark path, Suo was like the moon, gently and silently supporting Sakura’s spirit.

Sakura still remembered their faces before he died. Nirei’s bright smile suddenly disappeared, his eyes filled with tears and his voice choked, stuttering, almost having difficulty speaking. Suo was beside him, those eyes that were hard to understand at that time were filled with helplessness, pain, and also a burning anger inside. Their trembling fingers clung to Sakura's aching body at that time, Nirei tried to call out while Suo became flustered in trying to help.

When Hiragi carried him away, when he slowly lost consciousness. Before Sakura died, he looked back at them and gave a small smile.

Those painful looks could forever haunt Sakura for the rest of his life.

Now right in front of him were them again, and not completely them. But, Sakura still felt happy.

He was happy that his friends never changed.

[Sun and moon

I like them both!]

Sakura snorted and followed after Suo and Nirei. They didn't see or know that Sakura was looking at them, his eyes softening as he watched them talk about Nirei's notebook.

Both of their steps gradually slowed down, gradually drawing Sakura into that conversation in a strangely natural way. Sakura would occasionally blush and shout at them along the way. After that, Sakura quickly walked away with his face red. Nirei and Suo hurried after him, one of them giggling and flustered, the other laughing softly, adding a few small jokes that made Sakura try to run away from them even harder.

When he reached Kotoha's shop, Shishitoren had just arrived. Togame lazily glanced over, blinked slowly, and smiled, "Oh, we meet again, ant."

"Hey!?"

Umemiya walked out, and Chouji saw him immediately jump up and down happily to attract attention. The people passing by or nearby looked at Shishitoren warily, some unhappy, some worried.

"Calm down, of course I didn't break my promise to you." Umemiya smiled, but deep within that smile was a fiercely burning fire. Sakura shivered slightly.

"But before that," He trailed off and turned the conversation to the only person who hadn't appeared yesterday, "Sakura, what do you think of this battle?"

Sakura blinked and tilted his head, "Huh?

Umemiya seemed amused by Sakura's reaction, his expression softening a bit, as if he was talking to a child. Umemiya rubbed the back of his neck, "I don't know how to start explaining."

"Maybe we should start from when you left?" he asked, Sakura frowned. Umemiya glanced at Shishitoren, Chouji was still eager to swing his fist while Togame just shrugged, signaling that they could be patient a little longer. Chouji clearly didn't agree with that, but at Togame's advice, he calmed down a bit.

Sakura blinked again, feeling unfamiliar with this respect. The experience was so different from his previous life that it brought him strange feelings.

"Alright." Umemiya nodded to Togame, "Let me explain to you when we get to Fuurin, okay?"

[January 16th

I Hate School

People Are Mean]

....

Today was another hard day for teachers. There is a teacher who is middle-aged.

The teacher folded up his class's student files and placed them next to the pile of drawing assignments the students had submitted.

The drawings were colorful, simple, and cheerful. The subject of the drawing was the child's house and family.

The teacher stood up to prepare to hand in the student's application, his eyes stopped at a colorless drawing, drawn only by a red line that looked like it was the only crayon that child had.

On the slightly crumpled page was a picture of a boy standing in a small house. Next to it was a larger house with a smiling couple holding hands. They looked happy, in contrast to the boy in the house next door.

The teacher's eyes narrowed. He sighed, took the drawing and dropped it into the paper grinder.

It's just a random drawing by a seven year old boy, even if he threw it away, it wouldn't matter.

....

Sakura sighed, Umemiya noticed his expression.

"No need." They blinked, Sakura looked at them and said, "Just start the battle."

Togame tilted his head slightly, his eyes narrowed under his glasses. Chouji blinked and then smiled excitedly and brightly, he pulled Togame's hand, wanting to fight right away. Meanwhile, Kotoha and the others on Fuurin's looked a bit confused. Umemiya looked at Sakura's expression for a moment then snorted, "Okay, then let's go."

"What!?" Hiragi reacted, "Hey, don't be so hasty!?"

"Hmm? Didn't Sakura say it?" Umemiya asked, pointing his finger at Sakura with expressionless eyes looking away as Nirei asked him in a panic.

"But-"

"They're all here, Hiragi." Umemiya patted his friend's shoulder, Hiragi frowned and clicked his tongue as he turned away. He then grumbled something unclear.

Sakura narrowed his eyes, except for the situation that seemed different, the fact that the first years had decided to participate in this match on their own had not changed. Sakura was glad that it wasn't completely different from his memory, but, he still wondered.

Why did they need his opinion?

[January 16th

I know

I know I'm writing too much today

but today was really bad, you know?

I had to climb into my mom and father's house through the back window to get food because I was starving to death

And you know what?

I have a sibling!

Haha

...That sucks

I hope they's not like me

Or my parents will hate they]

The pain stretching across Sakura's arm and the sharp pain in his chest from each diary entry in the memory related to the other child made Sakura uncomfortable, he tried to control his gradually trembling breathing. It's hard to understand why his body has been tense since he entered Shishitoren.

Unconsciously Sakura pulled up his hood again, keeping his gait from losing balance while adjusting his small panic attack.

In the eyes of others, he is just a quiet and somewhat cold Fuurin student. No one knew, no one noticed the crescent-shaped mark that was forming on his palm.

"Sakura"

Sakura glanced over, Nirei beside his whispered, "Umemiya said we came here to talk, so please be careful."

Staring at Nirei's worried face, Sakura sighed again. He didn't like repeating what Umemiya had said and taught him, but well, Sakura didn't want to keep quiet about it either.

"Fighting is discussion." Nirei and Suo both looked at him blankly. Sakura looked ahead, her fake gray eyes following Umemiya's back. Sugishita glanced at them, his eyebrows furrowing as he listened to Sakura.

"Sometimes, fists are also used as a language." Sakura continued, taking one hand out of his pocket.

It was only now that they noticed that Sakura's hand was shaking, whether because he was worried or in pain. Crescent shapes appeared on the bandage where Sakura had pressed it, and disappeared quickly when he opened his hand.

"Sakura?" Nirei called out, clearly showing his concern and confusion towards his friend. Sakura continued to stare at his palm, then he lowered his hand.

"It's also a way for me to understand my opponent."

The three first-years looked at each other, Sugishita frowned, Nirei couldn't tell if he was angry or annoyed. Suo narrowed his eyes, watching Sakura's less stiff steps.

Chouji ran ahead, Togame and the others followed his footsteps. They turned their feet into an alley. Togame smirked, his eyes curved and turned towards Sakura as if challenging him. Sakura looked back emotionlessly.

He... started to miss the Togame he once knew.

Sakura rolled his eyes, looking around this old cinema. In his previous life, Shishitoren had renovated this place. Instead of being a fighting arena filled with blood and curses, the gloomy atmosphere became a place for people to interact and gather together. The atmosphere there was also much brighter after being painted with many colorful things.

Everyone started to walk in, Sakura walked at the end glancing at the crows, feeling like they were all staring at him.

Black crow, a creature associated with death and sadness.

Sakura has been seeing them since he was a kid.

He saw them near the school warehouse, seeing them at a time when it was already dark. He saw them occasionally perched on the stone steps and staring at him with those black, soulless eyes.

Sakura's life was not much different from that of crows.

Sakura sometimes feeds them. At that time, he often asked them with the innocent questions of a boy longing for love. They never responded, always eating and leaving.

Since then, Sakura has been feeding the birds and crows with the little money he managed to rob from someone or find in vending machines. That was almost a daily habit that Sakura did for them because they were willing to listen to a boy who often fought and grumbled.

As he grew older, his injuries became more severe to the point where he even had to be hospitalized, but Sakura somehow never starved the birds. His parents wouldn't pay the hospital bills anyway, and the doctors would definitely kick Sakura out as soon as they hung up.

Until one day the birds stopped appearing, Sakura also lost hope and gave up the habit. Just like that, he grew up in a state of mind always filled with repressed emotions.

The day Sakura ran away from his family and went to Makochi, not a single bird appeared.

...

Above them, all around the cinema, were the violent screams of the Shishitoren. Sakura looked down at Nirei, who was timidly standing near Suo with his face lowered in fear, Nirei's shoulders hunched up, almost burying his neck. Sakura glanced at the Shishitoren who had suddenly appeared behind them.

Everyone had a face full of malice.

Thinking back, it was strange to see these expressions on their faces again.

"You guys okay?" Umemiya turned to them and asked. "This is a pretty big deal. Honestly, I don't want to drag you guys into this. Because this is originally my matter with Tomiyama. Especially Sakura, I'm sorry for still dragging you into this."

Sakura raised his eyebrows. Umemiya smiled, "Just go and have fun, no need to be so serious."

"Happy in losing?" Sakura interrupted his words, smirking and glancing at Shishitoren. "I'm not the type to like losing."

It was great to see their surprised faces.

Nirei blinked, the same feeling of deja vu as when Sakura challenged Togame made him both excited and nervous. Suo chuckled, Sugishita snorted, clearly not objecting to what Sakura had declared.

Hiragi sighed, "Did you hear that?"

Umemiya laughed and nodded at them. "Man, you guys are so reliable!"

When Sugishita was called out, Sakura received another call. All the Fuurin stopped, focusing on him as if they were worried that Sakura's actions from yesterday would happen again. On the contrary, the expression they received was a strange neutral one.

No worry, no panic. Sakura picked up the phone with a calm voice, "Yes?"

Togame and Chouji glanced at each other, Chouji raised his hand to attract their attention again. "Ume!! Hurry up!"

"Wait, the leader can't go first." Togame reminded.

Sakura was silent, still keeping a calm expression as he listened to the other end. Suo tried to assess him, searching for any slight tension in Sakura's body. There was no tension shown at all. Umemiya tilted his head, watching Sakura's small nod.

Sakura lowered the phone and looked towards Sugishita. "I still haven't cleares up things with you yet."

Sugishita frowned, Sakura put the phone to his ear, took his other hand out of his pocket and pointed at him with a look that was both challenging and instructing, "If you lose to that idiot, you will definitely lose to me."

"What?" Sugishita growled. Sakura chuckled.

"Try and do well."

Sakura then exited the theater with his phone still in call mode, the annoying Shishitoren members moved out of his way.

Suo watched his back.

"He's really trustworthy."

Nirei was still surprised, stuttering and admiringly exclaiming, "Sakura is so cool..."

Hikagi sighed, perhaps he was worrying too much. Umemiya smiled, he turned towards Sugishita and said, "Sakura is cheering you on."

Sugishita frowned, snorted, turned away and walked down to where his opponent was waiting for him. It was clear that he did not accept that Sakura was cheering him on, to Sugishita, Sakura's words seemed like he was mocking him.

Umemiya saw the boy's grim expression and couldn't help but giggle and said, "That's fun."

Hiragi crossed his arms, his expression looking slightly relieved. "Yeah."

That kid was really more mature than they thought.

Leaving the fight between Sugishita and Arima while already knowing the outcome, Sakura stood outside, listening to the voice on the other side continue to talk to him.

"Sorry about the cigarettes and the door..."

Chapter Text

"Oh, it's nothing. I know it wasn't Sakura's doing."

The landlord's gentle and friendly voice rang out. Sakura bit his lip, he wanted to tell the truth but also didn't want to affect others because of him. Sakura knew, he remembered the couple who almost gave him that rented room for free.

They were a kind couple. Many times they had advised and persuaded Sakura to let them fix the room, many times they had brought him food. Even small jobs that help him make money are also supported by them.

When he asked for permission to fix the house, they were the happiest.

Sakura owed them too much, he knew that Sakura's father was not simply a violent, alcoholic, and drug-addicted man, but he was also a mean, rude guy who didn't take anyone seriously. They could get into trouble if he let them know.

Sakura clenched his phone tightly, his other hand unconsciously rubbing his bicep, where the scars from yesterday's panic attack were still visible. The persistent itch never stopped, old scars that he had never seen before appeared on this body.

Sakura didn't pay attention to the action of scratching his bicep, and almost lost consciousness when he smelled the scent of cigarettes and alcohol in his nose.

"Sakura?"

The landlady's worried voice rang out, and Sakura breathed out a shaky breath. He almost sat down on the ground, instead he leaned against the wall next to him. A nearby tavern owner raised his eyebrows and glanced at him from inside his shop.

Sakura waved his hand to get the man's attention away. The tavern owner squinted, snorted, and turned away. Sakura inhaled, trying to keep his voice from shaking. "Yes, it's just... probably just a thief..."

"A thief!? Oh my god, he didn't do anything to you, right?"

He almost strangled him to death.

"Yes, he didn't do anything..."

"Thank goodness." The landlady breathed a sigh of relief. Sakura could feel the warmth creeping into his chest. He stopped scratching, hesitated for a moment, then smoothed out the black virtual fabric that had been disturbed.

"So, when is Sakura coming back?"

Sakura paused, blinking as if the person on the phone was standing in front of him and asking.

"My husband said he just bought a delicious fish. He also asked if you could come over and chat with him tonight?"

"Ah..." Sakura was confused, not knowing how to respond. It seemed that not only were the people in Fuurin and Shishitoren different, but the people in Makochi were also different than he remembered.

"I... will think about it later."

After hearing the landlady's instructions a bit more, Sakura lowered his eyebrows. He stood there, trying to process what he didn't understand. The match was still going on, even from outside Sakura could hear the violent cheers coming from inside the theater.

It was uncomfortable not knowing what kind of situation he was in.

Sakura hung up, put his phone away, and adjusted his hood to return to the theater, which suddenly fell silent.

The Shishitoren members around the entrance of the theater were frozen in place. Sakura snorted, and the members were startled and quickly dispersed to let him enter the stage, where Sugishita was scowling and wiping blood from his mouth and Arima had completely passed out.

At that moment, the two of them suddenly made eye contact, Sugishita frowned but gave no sign of turning away. He stared at Sakura, Sakura narrowed his eyes and then smirked.

Sugishita was silent, reacting more normally to the laughter than Sakura expected. The rest of the Fuurin members noticed Sakura had returned, and quickly turned their attention to him.

"You're still here?" Nirei jumped up from his seat, surprised, and quickly approached Sakura. Suo followed, the two of them clinging to him like cats and mints.

Sakura was used to people clinging to him, so he just raised an eyebrow, "What are you asking?"

"You're not going anywhere?" The blond asked again, as if trying to figure out Sakura's problem.

"No." Sakura quickly replied. Nirei couldn't see his face because of his hood and hair.

Suo and Nirei looked at each other, behind them Higari frowned at Umemiya, who was thinking about something. Umemiya then suddenly pushed past the two first years, Nirei and Suo weren't too happy about being interrupted, but they stepped aside to let the older one talk to Sakura. Sugishita sat down on the chair, his eyes never leaving the two of them for even a second.

"Sakura." Umemiya placed him hands on his shoulders, Sakura tried to stop himself from following his instincts and tackled him to the floor.

This is Umemiya, not Sakura's father.

"Sakura, can you do me a favor?"

Sakura blinked, tilting his head slightly.

"It's nothing too serious."

"Hey, hey, are you done yet?" Togame was the next to interject, Higari, Nirei, and Sugishita immediately became annoyed at his teasing. Umemiya smiled, moving to make it easier for the Shishitoren member to reach his junior.

Hiragi's protective instincts kicked in, he immediately made a move to stop him, "Hey, Ume-" but was then stopped by Umemiya.

Sakura frowned, Togame still had that unpleasant smile. "Shall we talk?" He jerked his thumb towards the empty seat, a few rows away from Fuurin and all the other members of Shishitoren. His voice dropped a few notes, showing that his anger had not yet dissipated. "You and I aren't done with that yet."

Sakura growled back, raising his hands in a defensive stance, "What, do you want to fight?"

"Hm? No, no. Just talking." Togame shook his head.

"What?" His confused gaze shifted from Togame to Umemiya.

"Go and talk to him, Sakura." Umemiya did not object and pushed him away. Sakura's eyebrows were almost glued together, he opened his mouth to speak but then stopped. The older man patted Sakura's back twice more as if to encourage him, "Leave everything here to us."

Just like that, Sakura was forced to follow Togame's slow steps to a separate row of seats. He ignored Nirei's worried gaze, not paying attention to Sugishita and Suo's two following eyes. Togame sat down first, and when he didn't see Sakura sitting down, he was a bit confused. "What's wrong?"

"Why do we have to sit here?" Sakura asked, his voice mixed with a growl as if someone had just stolen his fun.

"Well. We need to talk, right?" Shishitoren's deputy leader replied lazily, patting the chair next to him. "Come on, sit down."

Sakura didn't sit down yet, he continued to ask: "Just talk?"

Togame nodded, "Yes, just talk."

This made Sakura uncomfortable, he refused to sit in on this conversation. "Don't you want to fight?"

They were supposed to fight, Sakura was looking forward to punching that damn face again. He wanted to see how much his current abilities could be a disadvantage to Togame. The current Sakura was not like the past Sakura, the brutal battles he had gone through during his time in Fuurin had taught Sakura a lot both physically and mentally.

So Sakura was looking forward to fighting Togame again. Because, this Togame was a bit more violent and annoying than the future Togame.

Sakura wasn't looking forward to a conversation now, that conversation should have been after the fight.

"I really want to fight too." Togame replied, Sakura was excited and wanted them to go to the ring, but Togame glanced at his hand. "But I think we'd better talk."

And then, Sakura suddenly remembered that Togame did not like violence like that scary appearance.

“I'm not injured, you know.” Sakura reminded, not sounding as angry as he thought. Perhaps the emotions of his previous life with Fuurin have gradually controlled him.

"Yeah, I know." Togame nodded, patting the chair next to him again. "So, can we talk?"

Sakura lost, okay, this time he would choose to talk. As Umemiya said, fighting doesn't always help. Wait, didn't Umemiya just ask Sakura to talk to Togame for him?

"Woah, you must be strong!" Chouji below clapped his hands happily. He had just jumped out of his seat when Togame shouted for Sako to pull him back.

Sakura raised his eyebrows and glanced at Chouji who was pouting as he sat back in his chair to Togame, his fake gray eyes narrowing.

Chouji swung his legs on the chair, he pointed at the two members of Shishitoren and ordered them to throw Arima onto the fighting floor. The members of Fuurin were visibly upset, with Suo's cold reaction and Nirei's surprised look showing that they didn't like the violent and cruel behavior here.

Togame turned to Sakura, who looked back expressionlessly. "You didn't seem surprised at all from the beginning to the end, huh?"

Sakura shrugged. He was just witnessing it again. Even if she was angry or upset, Sakura couldn't say anything from where she was sitting.

The next person to enter was Suo, his calm steps seemed to be provoking his opponent. He stopped at his exact spot and turned his head towards where Sakura was sitting, smiling as if telling Sakura to prepare to watch him perform.

Sakura rolled his eyes, jeez, this annoying guy did it again.

"Who do you think will win?" Togame suddenly asked. Sakura could vaguely see his emotions behind those glasses, they were unclear, just like Togame could barely see Sakura's expressions under the hood.

"Suo." Sakura replied, rubbing his eyes because the dye made his eyebrows and eyelashes itchy. It was a miracle that Sakura hadn't gotten a single drop of dye in his eyes yet.

"Yeah, I think so too."

Sakura leaned back in his chair, crossed his arms, and looked up at Suo's fight. Suo gracefully dodged, easily causing Kanuma to fall to the floor. His movements were always meant to tease his opponent, to annoy him and make him lose his composure. Above his head, Sakura could hear the whispers of the Shishitoren, they were talking about Kanuma, talking about his uselessness.

On the contrary, their deputy leader was strangely silent, the chaotic movements in him eyes were clearly grasped by Sakura in the palm of his hand. They were friends and talked to each other many times, so Sakura understood Togame the same way Togame understood him.

"Do you think we should stop the match?" Togame was startled, Sakura didn't think he would be so startled. They looked at each other, the orange glasses covering all the color in Togame's eyes.

"You understand what I mean, right?" Sakura gestured towards Chouji, who had started to yawn.

A moment of barely perceptible hesitation in Togame's body movement was once again caught by Sakura. "...Yeah."

Togame's next shout silenced everyone in the theater, Kanuma looked up in despair, his face covered in sweat and fear. Togame ruthlessly chased him off the stage, the Shishitoren members also started shouting, scolding and cursing Kanuma as if he was a worthless object that could be thrown away.

Hiragi clicked his tongue, Suo looked towards Sakura again. He nodded slightly, then stepped down the stage and was excitedly rushed by Nirei, who kept praising him. Umemiya smiled, nodding in congratulations to Suo. Sugishita was still the same, always silent and only paying attention to Umemiya. Sakura looked at them, remembering that the seat right next to Nirei who had just stood up was the seat he had been sitting in, now it was empty.

Togame sat back in his chair, he breathed out. When he realized the person next to him was looking at him, Togame turned around, squinted his eyes and smiled, "You-"

"You're worried."

Togame's smile distorted, he frowned, "What?"

"You always watching Chouji and getting restless whenever Chouji wants to get into a fight." Sakura didn't look at him, his eyes following Kanuma as he dragged Arimu out of the theater. The desperation radiating from them was so heavy it was pitiful.

The silence between them stretched strangely, Hiragi had accepted the challenge, he had gone up to the stage and Sakura still hadn't received a response. He glanced over awkwardly, still feeling a little nervous about his clumsiness in trying to talk to others.

Sakura had tried to learn these things from everyone, and he had tried it with some of his new juniors. Their confused and relieved reactions after each conversation with Sakura let him know that, perhaps, he wasn't so bad at this.

Like the children who had spoken to Sakura, Togame was surprised, his eyes widening behind his glasses and his lips parting slightly as if he wanted to say something. He laughed, there was no humor in it and it had a heavy taste. Togame frowned, glaring at Sakura.

He was confused and scared of having his emotions read.

"Stop acting like you understand me." Togame growled, instinctively defensive to hide his weak nature.

Sakura tilted his head, his dyed black hair almost covering his eyes.

[January 20

It seems that Mom and father like my new little siblings quite a bit

I'm a little jealous

But what can I do

I'm a bad kid]

“Then stop acting like you're a cruel person.” He replied, watching Hiragi's fight but still glancing at Togame. Togame blinked, his eyes blinking rapidly and stiffly.

"Haha..." He frowned, "Are you a psychotherapist? Why do you always pay attention?"

“Psychotherapist??” Sakura frowned, the question was so innocent that even Togame couldn't help but laugh. He blushed, wishing he could punch that face.

"Why don't you know that?" Togame breathed out, letting go of the tension that had just been between them. The fight between Hiragi and Sako was still going on. Sakura crossed his arms and leaned on the armrests of the chair.

"Hm..." Togame's voice softened noticeably, the smile on his lips gentler and softer than the previous smiles. He turned to Sakura and asked: "At first I wanted to talk to you, but then you talked more. Why do you have to keep confusing me like that?"

"Am I confusing you?"

"Yeah, you're giving me chills."

"Good, that's what I want."

Togame chuckled. Sakura snorted, his cheeks flushing as usual whenever he helped someone. They turned their attention back to the fight.

Sako jumped back in surprise as Hiragi patted him on the shoulder and talked about the kick just now. Everyone was surprised, Sako growled and immediately rushed forward. The two of them kept throwing punches, quick kicks, and many bruises.

Togame blinked then stroked his chin. Out of three battles, Togame had a good opinion of this battle. But, he could still see that Sako was at a disadvantage compared to the other Fuurin member. Sako's spirit seemed to be changing, he could see the wavering in his face and fists.

Shishitoren was confused between cheering or scolding Sako, the first years of Fuurin were all watching in surprise. Umemiya smiled where he was sitting, pride written all over his face.

Togame glanced over, Sakura was leaning back in him chair, his hood almost slipping off his head. Those grey eyes followed every movement above and had no reaction.

"You trust them? I don't see you surprised at all."

"Why should I be surprised?" Sakura asked back, not looking at Togame but confidently replying. "They'll win anyway."

"You're really confident." Togame laughed, his curiosity towards this person growing stronger by the moment.

Just like Sakura said, Sako lost to Hiragi. The members of Shishitoren gradually became tense, this time no one could stop Chouji from stepping onto the stage. He could clearly see that Togame's tension was getting heavier by the second, Sakura sighed.

"Are you worried about him?" Togame frowned. Sakura yawned, not caring about the other's discomfort. "Stop hiding it, you're making me uncomfortable."

"What's wrong?" Sakura asked, "We're here to talk, right?"

"If you don't say anything, I'll jump up there and ask your leader."

Go up and talk to Chouji? That was the worst idea Togame had ever heard. But when he looked into Sakura's eyes, Togame knew that Sakura was serious. Was he even making moves to stand up and go up there, standing between Umemiya and Chouji to talk?

Togame lost this time, he really didn't dare to risk letting Sakura go up there and talk to Chouji. Even though he himself wanted to go down there and tell his friend.

"You really know how to bully people."

"Thanks? I learned it from a bastard."

Sakura learned it from Kaji.

Deputy leader Shishitoren shook his head, his annoyance towards Sakura from the first time they met had fallen into oblivion. Togame looked at Sakura, Sakura signaled that he was listening.

The noise around them continued to resound, the violent battle above caused blood stains to start appearing on the arena floor. Togame confided his every thought to Sakura, Sakura remained silent the whole time, him face calm and gentle to the point that Togame thought his story wasn't worth his attention.

Chouji's nose was bleeding, Togame panicked and tried to stand up, but Sakura pulled his attention back with a sentence: "You're such a hypocrite."

"You're starting to make me uncomfortable again." Togame grumbled. Sakura shrugged, come on, he was right.

"Listen man." Sakura started to get more serious, still a bit clumsy because he stopped mid-sentence. "Do you trust me?"

Togame raised his eyebrows.

What kind of question was this?

He tilted his head, smirking, "I don't think it's a good idea to trust someone you've just met for the second time, little ant."

Sakura frowned, suppressing his anger. Togame was on the defensive, deliberately provoking Sakura to gain the upper hand. Sakura had learned how to talk to many people. After every conversation with Umemiya, Kaji, Tsubaki, Suo, Nirei, and even Sugishita, he had learned how to do it.

"Stop hiding, do you trust me?"

Togame was hesitating.

He didn't say anything and Sakura knew he was hesitating.

"What are you afraid of?"

A strange question was brought to Togame's face. Right here, in the row of seats away from their friends, a sadness fell on those large shoulders. Togame spoke, his voice distant as if he himself was lost in the past. "I'm afraid he'll be lonely, I'm afraid I'll make him unhappy."

The fear was hidden behind a cruel appearance. A sad boy who tries to please others and locks himself in a panic about the past. Togame has been through this for many days, months, and years. He always tries to run after his friend.

Togame is afraid that one day he will not have enough strength to run after Chouji. Then Chouji will be left behind, he will sink into the abyss of violence. Togame doesn't want that, he is willing to let his hands be stained with blood for his friend.

He wants to see Chouji smiling brightly under the sunlight with everyone again.

"I... don't want him to be sad."

Sakura stared at Togame, a strange emotion moving in his eyes that Togame couldn't read. Sakura sighed.

"Do you think it would be good for him like this?" He grumbled, Togame was confused. "This isn't the help you think it is."

"So... what I'm doing is meaningless?" Togame hesitated, his face scrunching up as he tried to express something with his clumsy fingers. "Like... useless?"

"Not exactly." Sakura shook his head, "You two are a mess."

"What?"

Sakura hated meddling in other people's business, but fuck it, Togame looked like he was about to jump out when Umemiya scolded Chouji for his role as leader.

Chouji screamed, pulling his hair and shouting over and over that Umemiya didn't know anything. Nirei and Suo and everyone else there looked scared and confused.

Togame jumped up, wanting to rush over and stop them. "Hey-"

A hand pulled him back, Togame turned his head. He looked from the bandaged hand up to that face, Sakura's hood had fallen off. He tightened his grip on Togame's arm.

"You, do you trust me?"

The fight continued in a more bloody intensity, Chouji's fists landed heavily on Umemiya's face. Togame wanted to pull his hand away from Sakura, but Sakura didn't let him do so and instead tightened his grip.

Umemiya didn't resist, he let Chouji punch, biting hard on his shoulder. Those anxious gasps rang out. Even Hiragi knew, he was still a little restless in his seat.

The grip on Togame's wrist did not lessen in the slightest, he turned around and wanted to scream at Sakura but then froze when Sakura looked back at him.

Umemiya sat up, he gently approached Chouji with calm words. Chouji stumbled, he stepped back when the Fuurin leader raised his hand towards him, holding his head with both hands. Umemiya's words reached not only Chouji but also Togame. Togame weakly stopped struggling, he pursed his lips.

Only now, Togame finally understood what Sakura meant.

Umemiya suddenly shouted and banged their heads together. All the Shishitoren were confused, not knowing how to react. Like them, Togame stood still like a piece of wood. He was startled when a hand pushed his back.

"What? go and come there with your friend." Sakura patted his back..

Togame pursed his lips, nodded and quickly rushed up to the stage with Chouji.

Now that Sakura was alone in this row, the loneliness from Togame's shoulders moved to cling to his shoulders. The obsession with the past is so heavy that the lights of the arena can hardly shine on it. Umemiya looked up, he turned towards Sakura, gave a thumbs up and smiled brightly.

Sakura sighed, smiling wryly at him.

So he mission is done, right?

Uh, no.

Sakura forgot about their rooftop meal.

 But he didn't care much, Umemiya was right, these dishes were delicious.

Everyone sat together in a circle, on the cardboard. Umemiya noticed Togame, he asked, "Togame, aren't you eating anything?"

Togame put down the chopsticks and plate and bowed to apologize to them. Chouji was confused and didn't want him to be like that. Even when he tried to speak, Togame didn't look up.

"Hmm..." Leader of Fuurin thought, to everyone's surprise he turned to ask the person who was eating the most enthusiastically. "Did you hear that? What will you do, Sakura?"

Sugishita frowned in confusion, Nirei who was asking for a cup of tea from Suo stopped. Suo blinked, curiously waiting for Sakura's reaction.

Sakura picked up a piece of chicken leg and put it in his mouth and chewed, he glanced at Togame, rolling his eyes at the fact that he accepted any punishment Sakura would give.

"Listen to yourself more." Sakura continued eating, not paying attention to anyone. "Don't keep living like that, you hear me?"

The chopsticks stopped, Sakura raised his eyebrows and was startled when everyone was looking at him. He blushed and stammered, "W-what!? Did I say it wrong?"

"Huh? No, no!" Nirei was the first to respond, his eyes were so sparkling that Sakura had to step back.

Togame clenched his pants, he chuckled, making Sakura blush even more. Now everyone could clearly see the green color in deputy leader Shishitoren's eyes, it was gentle and, unsurprisingly, did not match his previous cruel appearance at all. Perhaps Togame was wearing glasses on purpose to hide his eyes. Sakura remembered that he had never asked that of his friend before.

"I understand."

Everyone's laughter subsided, and Togame sincerely bowed his head in front of Sakura.

"I promise I will change."

He'll do it.

Sakura snorted, he didn't say anything more during that rooftop conversation.

When they returned, Sasaki who was sitting in front of the cafe quickly stood up, the child's eyes lit up but then he glanced shyly at Sakura as if worried about the outcome. Sakura blinked, a little confused that the child was standing in front of him instead of Umemiya.

Sakura hesitated, he wasn't used to this oh my god.

Sakura put his hand on Sasaki's head, his face almost red. "You... you don't have to worry anymore."

Sasaki smiled brightly, he wiped his tears with his hand and thanked them repeatedly. Kotoha peeked her head from inside the cafe, satisfied and opened the door to welcome them back.

[I'm a bad kid, right?]

Everyone happily walked into the shop, Nirei and Suo stopped, they didn't see Sakura enter so they asked with concern, "What's wrong, Sakura?"

Everyone turned to Sakura again, always paying attention to him. Sakura put his hands in his pockets. He rolled eyes and turned his shoes, "I'm going home."

"Huh? What?"

"Eh?"

This time he didn't let Umemiya grab his collar, "I have a date tonight."

Sakura walked away. Sugishita frowned, his eyes still following Sakura's back until it disappeared. He kept feeling something strange from Sakura.

Umemiya, who was about to pull Sakura back, tilted his head, his arm motionless in the air hanging down to his side and his aching body. He raised his head, sighing softly.

It's also getting dark already.

[Mom said that

The teacher said the same thing

My friends' parents also said the same

Maybe I really am a bad kid]

The landlord couple warmly welcomed Sakura into their home. Sakura was dragged away by them, and in the blink of an eye, he sat down at the table with two plates of grilled fish on the table. The landlady brought out a bottle of wine and a bottle of soft drink. She placed them in front of them and gently sat down together.

Sakura did not move his chopsticks, and the landlord did not force him to eat. He poured wine into a small cup, lifted it towards him, "Sorry for disturbing you at this hour."

"Yes?"

The couple smiled, Sakura didn't know why he was so shy.

"Actually, I called you because I wanted to ask your opinion."

"Yes?"

"We're planning to renovate that house."

"What?"

"Then it's fine for Sakura to stay with us for the time being."

"What??"

"No need to worry about the repair costs. We've already taken care of everything, now Sakura just needs to temporarily move you things to our house."

"Huh?

"In a moment, we'll come over to help you move your things, okay?"

"Huh?? What!? No, no!" Sakura stuttered, startled at himself when he suddenly shouted at the older man.

The couple laughed again.

Damn it, Sakura's going to turn into a tomato!!

"Hurry up and eat, then I'll help you..." The landlord suddenly stopped talking, his eyebrows furrowed as he looked outside. Sakura hesitantly followed him.

From here they could easily see the wooden door of the inn where Sakura was staying was flung open, the old couple both frowned. Before they could react, Sakura had already jumped up and rushed out.

Sakura didn't have time to put on his shoes, he quickly put on the landlord's slippers and ran towards the dilapidated inn. His hurried steps almost tripped his on the stairs.

From inside the house, a man with a bushy mustache came out with an envelope, Sakura rushed at him. They slammed into each other on the inn door, creating a loud noise. Sakura growled.

The man quickly pushed him away, grabbed Sakura by the collar and swung his fist, hitting him in the face. Sakura then kicked the man in the chest, sending him crashing into the moldy wall.

The man yelled, his voice filled with anger and loud. Sakura dodged his punch, gasping for breath. His body was cold with invisible fear that was constantly struggling to control it. The lamp hanging above their heads shook violently, and the futon was pushed into the corner.

Sakura tried to snatch the envelope from the man's hand, he clamped his hand around his neck. The tall man struggled, he grabbed Sakura's leg and threw him into a pile of cardboard boxes. Sakura quickly stood up, eyes wide like a wild animal growling to protect its territory.

"Get away from that kid before I call the police!!"

They stopped, the man glared fiercely at Sakura and quickly left. The old couple angrily chased him away, cursing and scolding the man. Glaring until the man disappeared, they turned back to look at the messy scene in the house.

Sakura stood in the middle of the house, his black hair hanging down, the Fuurin uniform jacket almost falling off his shoulders. Blood and dirt stains appeared on his white T-shirt underneath.

"Sakura."

Sakura gasped, not hearing any calls from them and suddenly sat down on the floor.

The worried couple surrounded him, the woman used a towel to wipe the blood from Sakura's face, the man cursed and checked his body.

Sakura didn't look at them, his eyes were focused solely on the torn envelopes in the corner of the room.

"Sakura, oh poor child. How dare he hit you like that?" The landlady sadly stroked Sakura's bruised cheek. She placed both hands on his face and gently lifted Sakura's face. "You look terrible."

There was a deep cut on Sakura's left eyelid, his face was covered in bruises. Every time the landlady touched him, he could feel the pain.

Sakura's arms fell to his sides, he blinked, feeling the blood blocking his left vision. When the old couple wanted to take him to the hospital, Sakura refused. He grabbed her wrist and accidentally smeared blood on it without paying attention.

"Please don't tell anyone."

"But-"

"It's my father." Sakura moaned, almost begging. His vision gradually blurred with a severe headache, Sakura slammed his head into the landlady's shoulder. "Please don't tell anyone..."

The couple looked at each other, biting their lips and hugging him tightly. Sakura moaned softly as they moved. The landlord's wrinkled hand rested on the top of his head, he whispered, "It's okay, boy. We won't tell anyone."

"Let us clean up this place for you, okay?"

Chapter Text

Sakura didn't remember the whole thing, his body had completely jumped at the man on reflex. Every punch that landed on Sakura's face sent his body into a state of alarm, many of his body's defense mechanisms being pushed to their highest. Anger mixed with the weakest fear made Sakura's fists weaker and more hesitant.

The landlord couple led him back to their house, away from the mess and promised him they would clean it up for him. Sakura was silent, his whole body aching, too tired to protest to them.

They cleaned his wound, Sakura glanced at the pile of red-dyed cotton swabs beside her, his eyebrows furrowing slightly when they weren't black. Why doesn't the dye wash down?

Sakura's eyes itched, he was sure his contact lenses had accidentally been knocked out during the fight. The landlord returned with some medicine and gave it to his wife. The older woman nodded, she set it down next to the glass of water next to the pile of old bandages.

When they peeled off the old bandages and clothes from Sakura, both of them stiffened. They frowned, their hands reaching out as if to touch the old scar on his stomach. Sakura didn't pay any attention to this, his head was aching terribly.

They let him lean against the wall, the woman quickly cleaned the blood from the wounds and applied medicine. Sakura could feel her hesitation every time she ran her hand over the scars on his arm and stomach. Sakura wanted to close his eyes, his mind gradually lost consciousness at some point.

...

"Sa..."

"Sakura..."

"Sakura."

Sakura blinked, looking up at the old couple dreamily. They smiled, put the medicine and a glass of water in his hand, "Drink the medicine first and go to sleep."

After letting him drink the medicine, they dragged him to a futon that had been laid out. The landlady pulled the blanket up for him, adjusting Sakura's body to lie as comfortably as possible. Then she tilted her head to talk to her husband, "Aren't you going to take a bath?"

The husband was frowning in thought, when asked by his wife, he immediately turned around and replied: "Not yet, I'm going to clean up the inn for the child first. Then I can take a bath."

What?

No, they'll find the dye, contact lenses, and diary!

"No..." Sakura muttered, the couple immediately noticed him. They frowned, the woman sat nearby, Sakura pulled the corner of her shirt and groaned, "Please don't touch..."

The husband left his seat, sitting next to his wife. His old eyes looked at Sakura, sad and understanding. He reached out to stroke him hair, "Well, then when you wake up, we'll clean up together, okay?"

Sakura blinked, hesitantly nodding. They smiled, patting his head. Until Sakura gradually fell asleep, he saw a small figure sneak past the couple and approach him.

That night, Sakura slept in a stranger's house for the first time since arriving here, and he was not awakened, nor was he disturbed by the noises of fear.

When Sakura woke up, in front of him was the landlord sitting smoking and reading the newspaper. The smell of his cigarettes wafted through the air, cool and not as nauseating as the feeling he had experienced. Next to him, a small calico-colored cotton ball tilted its head, it blinked its green eyes, Sakura also blinked at it.

Sakura sat up, frowning slightly from the pain. The man heard the noise, he turned around, "Oh, you're awake, kid."

Sakura blinked, still not fully awake from sleep. The furball beside his yawned, sitting up and licking it fur. The landlord chuckled, lowering the newspaper so that he could see the table already set, "If you're awake, come here and have breakfast."

Sakura tilted his head, not noticing the little cotton ball tilting its head along with him, "Breakfast?-"

"I told you not to smoke here!?"

"Ack!??"

"Can't you see Sakura is here!? Do you want the kid to get sicker because of you??"

"Hey, what!? I know I'm wrong, but don't hit me so hard!?"

The couple were arguing, Sakura was startled by the appearance of the landlady just now. He frowned in confusion, sitting there motionless like an innocent child who didn't know anything. The little cotton ball sat silently beside him, Sakura looked down at it, the two of them looked at each other for a few minutes then looked up to watch the landlady and her husband argue.

What the hell were they doing in the morning?

In the blink of an eye Sakura was sitting at the table with the couple, in the blink of an eye he was at the door of the inn with the landlord and their cat.

Wait, when did the cat appear here?

Do they have a cat?

The husband grumbled about his wife's violence, Sakura looked at him, hesitated for a moment before daring to say, "I can do it myself."

"What are you talking about, kid?" The man raised his eyebrows, shook his head and waved his hand. "Hurry up and go in and clean up before the builders come."

Huh?

"Builders??" Sakura asked in panic, what the hell? Builders? Are they going to rebuild this house?!

"Yeah? I told you yesterday." The landlord replied, his eyes darting from the rotten floor to the old walls. Sakura could hear him grumbling about how he could still live here regardless and not listen to their advice in the first place.

"But you said to fix the house, not rebuild it!"

"Oh, did I say that?" The man looked at him in surprise, then rubbed the back of his neck and laughed. "I guess I didn't say it correctly so you'd misunderstand."

"Huh?"

"We want to rebuild the whole house."

"Huh??"

"So you probably have to stay at our house for a long time!"

HAH?????

"Haha, what's wrong? Is this so surprising?" The landlord laughed loudly and patted Sakura's back, the force causing his to ache. Sakura blushed, uncomfortably rubbing his sore spot. The curious cat ran around, sniffing here and there.

In his previous life, this never happened, even though the couple had wanted to fix his house many times, Sakura always found a way to refuse them. Who would have thought that they would be even more stubborn here?

Having even called a Builders, Sakura couldn't refuse them no matter what.

"But I'm serious." Sakura looked over, the smile on the landlord's lips had disappeared, his eyebrows furrowed in an attempt to express something. "You okay?"

His hand was placed on Sakura's back, Sakura felt the temperature from his hand, causing his skin to suddenly tingle. Sakura looked at him, not understanding why he was surprised. He had heard this sentence many times from his friends, the way they looked at him was always a bit different.

Occasionally, people in Makochi would ask him the same thing, their gazes always made Sakura wonder:

Did his parents ever look at him like that?

[January 21

I ruined my last pencil

Someone has taken it

It broke and ended up in the trash

I'm using the writable part of it

Father looked really scary when he heard the neighbor say I had been rummaging through the trash

Perhaps the neighbor's daughter to tell them]

“Yes, I’m fine.”

Sakura walked into the bathroom and collected all the dye and contact lenses into a box. He placed it on the sink, exhaled, and looked around to see if anything was missing. His eyes stopped at the mirror, his reflection in the mirror was so pathetic that it was painful.

The cut on Sakura’s left eyelid had been treated, his left eye was slightly drooping, and there was a huge bruise under his cheekbone. Yesterday, Sakura’s right cheek had hit something, causing it to tear and swell severely, the landlady had applied medicine and put cotton on it for him. Sakura’s nose was sore, his lip was torn. There was another bandage on his right shoulder. The landlord's old shirt made him look like a kid who had just been bullied.

Sakura frowned at his reflection in the mirror, his eyes suddenly blurred. He blinked, rubbing his eyes with his hand in annoyance.

Suddenly the reflection in the mirror was replaced by a smaller teenager, the wound on his face was even more severe than Sakura's. The child's two-colored eyes were lifeless, his body small but healthy.

...

In the quiet school, the students had already left. The cleaner now starts cleaning up.

She strode around the hallway to clean. Suddenly, the sound of running water coming from the nearby restroom startled her. The cleaner looked around anxiously, hesitating for a while before daring to approach the restroom.

She squinted at the crack in the restroom door.

A child was standing in front of the sink, so quiet and gloomy that she thought she was seeing things.

It's not even dark yet and there's already a ghost!?

Until she noticed the child's strange hair color, the cleaner frowned. Why was that weird kid still here?

The cleaner tried to magnify her vision, then she witnessed the boy's painful actions.

The child rubbed the bruises on his knuckles so hard that they turned red and bled again. Then he held his hand out to the sink, leaving it there until the blood had completely drained before turning off the water.

When he walked out, the cleaner was startled to see his bruised face. They looked at each other, the child turned and left in the silent hallway.

The cleaner frowned, hesitantly looking back into the bathroom. Her eyes were fixed on the trash can there, where the bloody white bandages had not yet been completely stuffed back in.

...

"Sakura?"

Sakura was startled and knocked over the box, the landlord outside heard the noise, worriedly knocked on the door and called out to him again, "Sakura, are you okay in there?"

"Ah, um, w-wait a minute!" Sakura frantically put the things back into the box. He frowned at the uncomfortably large number of them.

Did that kid only focus his money on these damn things!?

The landlord raised his eyebrows and looked at Sakura from head to toe as he walked out, squinting and tilting his head and suspiciously examining every detail of Sakura's face.

"You didn't hide any magazines in there, did you?-"

"What the hell are you talking about!?" Sakura shouted, his face turned red.

"Don't yell like that." The man pretended to grumble, he crossed his arms and nodded towards the neatly folded cardboard box in the middle of the room, where their little furball sat neatly. "Who told you to take so long, I've already finished packing everything."

"Huh?" Sakura looked up in disbelief, then frowned in confusion. "Why so fast??"

"You have too little stuff, kid." The landlord shook his head and sighed, his arms crossed. Sakura was bewildered, trying to remember how long he had been in the bathroom. Even the lights had been taken down, the futon was neatly folded and placed in a box.

Fuck, what level is this??

The landlord snorted, his back bowed because the arrangement made his back a bit tired. The wooden board under their feet was slightly sunken, probably breaking a few pieces after yesterday's fight.

"Are you sure you didn't do anything in there-"

"Yes!!" Sakura reacted strongly, his hand squeezing the edge of the box in his hand out of habit. If his face was compared to the tomatoes grown by Umemiya, they were exactly the same.

Success made the innocent child blush, the man chuckled with satisfaction. He sighed, glad that Sakura wasn't restless while they were here. Though he hadn't told him, both of them had been against Sakura's decision to clean up after himself from the start.

Leaving a child alone in a place that had almost killed him? This was the worst idea they'd ever seen.

There were so many questions he wanted to ask Sakura, so many questions, so many things he wanted to know.

He wanted to know why Sakura had so few belongings, why he had so few clothes, and why the man he called 'father' could be so cruel to his son.

But...

"Oh right, there." The landlord placed an old notebook on the box Sakura was holding. Sakura recognized it as a diary, and before he could even be surprised or ask, the man had patted it.

"I haven't read it."

Perhaps he would ask that another time, when Sakura would come to them of his own accord.

Just like how they can get to know the cat they rescued.

[January 22

Surprise! I actually missed my birthday for seven years.

How interesting

Who would have thought I wouldn't know my birthday until I was seven?

Mom and Dad never mentioned it to me, even less so my father.

I found out I was born on April 1st because my mom gave me my birth certificate

She said she didn't want that in her cupboard

She was so cruel.

Haha

I miss my grandmother so much. It seems like the last and only little cake she gave me at the beginning of summer that year was for my birthday. ]

Sakura didn't go to school today.

That was a very worrying matter for them. Nirei was restless all morning, Suo next to him was disturbed by Nirei's shaking feet and couldn't help but ask, "What's wrong?"

Nirei was startled, he looked up at Suo. "Sakura has been missing all morning."

"Have you called him yet?" Suo asked.

Nirei pursed his lips, he turned his phone face down on the table. Suo noticed that he had been holding his phone since he arrived at class, so he must have texted Sakura. Nirei hesitantly rubbed the back of his neck, "I don't have his number..."

Suo blinked, he tilted his head, "Oh."

Nirei was embarrassed and didn't look at him, they continued to be silent right after that. When Sakura wasn't around, the two of them didn't say much, Because they mostly only talk to each other when Sakura is here. So without the other person, Nirei didn't know what to say to Suo.

"Hey, hey, what are you two talking about?" Tsugeura asked, interrupting them, sweat covering his body. Just now, when he was doing push-ups, he also noticed Nirei's restlessness, and now he asked after doing push-ups.

"Ah, we were worried because Sakura didn't come to school." Nirei replied, hesitating because he was glancing at the notebook while looking back at Tsugeura.

"Sakura? That black-haired guy who fought with Sugishita last time?" Tsugeura rubbed his chin and clapped his hands, then he suddenly felt a shiver. It turned out that Sugishita in the corner was mentioned by name so he felt uncomfortable, he looked up and glared at them.

Nirei explained in confusion while Suo just chuckled. Tsugeura looked at them, tilted his head as if thinking about something, and asked, "Anyway, do you guys want to go get something to eat?"

"Huh?"

Kiryuu sat at the back of the classroom, eyes narrowed. The music coming from his headphones still played a few tunes.

Although Tsugeura tried to invite more classmates, he only succeeded in dragging Sugishita. Sugishita's face was grimacing, clearly uncomfortable with being forced, but, Suo knew that he followed them because he wanted to see Sakura. Because yesterday Suo noticed that Sugishita, like him, felt something strange about Sakura.

They walked in a group, Tsugeura kept talking about his muscles while Nirei listened to him with an expression that was confirmed to be confused and puzzled. The people who passed by them all smiled, they greeted back.

"Did you see Sakura?"

"Hmm? Looks like he followed Momo to the bakery."

The conversation of the couple at the nearby fruit shop attracted Suo and Sugishita.

"Really? What a pity, I was about to give him some apples. The boy looks so bad."

"Don't worry, I gave him."

"That's good, I've been feeling worried about him."

"Yes, I wonder what happened."

"Do you think it was during the match with Shishitoren yesterday?"

"Hmm... I don't know."

"Suo, Sugishita! What's wrong?" Nirei yelled calling them. Suo and Sugishita were silent, they glanced at each other and didn't say anything.

"Nirei." Suo suddenly called, Nirei looked at him. "How about we go to the bakery."

"Huh?" Nirei was confused, Tsugeura beside him raised his eyebrows at his request.

"Why don't we go to the restaurant?" Tsugeura asked. Suo just smiled without responding to him. Sugishita frowned and glanced at them, clearly trying to force something.

They went to the bakery at Suo's suggestion, and Sugishita even though he denied it. Tsugeura asked him what kind of bread he should eat, Nirei suggested some that he thought were good, and Suo said some teas would be good with bread.

Their conversation stopped when they saw a familiar figure at the bakery, next to Mrs. Momo. The person looked up, their eyes meeting.

Half an hour ago, before Momo was about to go to the market, Sakura followed her. He protested against the way the landlord couple didn't want him to go, for Sakura these injuries had never been that serious. Sakura didn't care what other people thought of him when they saw him like this.

After all, no matter what they said, it was still better than the words he had heard throughout his childhood.

He stubbornly ran after the woman and blushed when she asked if it was because Sakura wanted to help and was worried about her having to carry the heavy stuff herself?

Oh come on, the woman was only up to his chest! How the hell was she supposed to carry all that damn stuff!!

Sakura grumbled all morning and didn't notice that most of the things he held were intentionally added by Makochi people because they saw his appearance. Sakura ran after Momo, the image of him with a bruised face was known to everyone in Makochi, perhaps it even reached Umemiya's ears.

Who cares? Even if Sakura escaped to the other continent, Umemiya and his friends would drag him back to ask.

They were always like that, always a noisy and annoying bunch.

And Sakura... He missed them.

Sakura sighed, he looked at the large bag of cakes that the cake shop owner was pushing into Momo's hands. Are these people always like this?

The sound of familiar footsteps rang in Sakura's ears, he looked up and saw them. Nirei, Suo, Tsugeura and Sugishita were all standing there with wide eyes.

Sakura frowned. What the hell were they doing here?

"Sakura, try this." Mrs. Momo tugged on his sleeve, Sakura looked away from his friends and was startled when the woman suddenly stuffed a piece of cake into his mouth.

"Wha-" Sakura choked on the cake, he blinked, blinked, and blinked again.

Oh, this is really delicious.

The cake shop owner and the landlady chuckled, "Do you like it?"

"I-it's okay." Sakura shyly turned away.

The other four were still standing there, Sakura looked at them again. Nirei stuttered then quickly rushed forward. He grabbed Sakura's face and asked in fear, "What's wrong with you Sakura??"

Sakura frowned and shivered at Suo's strange gaze and Sugishita's annoyed expression. Nirei ignored them, he pulled Sakura's hood down and examined Sakura's face. Then noticing the bandage on Sakura's shoulder, Nirei suddenly pulled Sakura's shirt up.

Sakura blushed, he shouted, "Hey!?"

No one paid any attention to his shout.

"Oh god..." Nirei trembled, his face pale as he weakly let go of Sakura's shirt. Sakura adjusted his shirt.

"What happened, Sakura?" Sakura raised his eyebrows. Nirei looked like he was about to cry as he stuttered, "Who? W-who did this to you?"

Sakura frowned, he grumbled, "Why are you guys here?"

"You still haven't answered Nirei's question." Suo spoke up, his voice lacking any mirth or teasing in it. Sakura wasn't surprised by his reaction, after all they were close friends in their previous life.

"Dude, you look terrible." Tsugeura who was still in shock said worriedly, his face scrunching up. "Are you alright?"

Sakura was about to reply out of habit but then pursed his lips, being a little careful with his words. he glanced at his bandaged forearm, "It hurts a little, but I'm fine."

His friends didn't seem fine at all.

"What happened yesterday? No." Nirei corrected, "What happened last night?"

Sakura looked at them and then looked back at the landlady. Mrs. Momo smiled faintly at him, "Go and talk to your friends."

Her wrinkled fingers wrapped around the bag of cookies. Sakura pursed his lips.

[January 23

Mom and father aren't home

They went somewhere early in the morning.]

"Yes, I'll be back soon."

Sakura left his things and followed them. Immediately he was attacked by many questions. Sakura couldn't answer any of them properly and always avoided mentioning something with his overly clumsy defense.

Suddenly, while Nirei was trying to ask, Sakura ran away from them and kicked a guy standing in front of the drink shop there.

"Kiryuu!?"

Sugishita reacted quickly, running right behind Sakura a few seconds later.

Kiryuu looked just as confused as them, he turned around, "Oh, everyone's here?"

"We just happened to pass by." Tsugeura replied, noticing the girl standing behind Kiryuu but saying nothing. He ran to support Sakura, "Sakura, let me join in!!"

Sakura and Sugishita grumbled but also backed away smoothly so that the group of thugs could split into three directions. Kiryuu blinked, Sakura's wounded body moved back and forth as if it didn't hurt. The strength of the punches and the coordination between Sakura and Sugishita made his body suddenly excited.

Kiryuu laughed, the girl beside him hesitantly looked at him.

"Suo, protect her for me." Kiryuu said, Suo turned to him and smiled and nodded. Nirei looked back and forth between them, hesitantly letting the other girl go behind both him and Suo.

The four Fuurin students rushed in and quickly finished off the group of thugs. As soon as Sakura fixed his shirt, Nirei pounced on him and anxiously checked all the wounds. Sakura blushed and tried to push him away.

Kiryuu, after saying goodbye to the student, turned his attention to them. He looked at the thick bandages wrapped around Sakura's waist and chest, where Nirei had pulled his shirt to reveal.

"Oh my, that place really hurts."

"It clearly looks terrible!!" Nirei shouted. Sakura rolled his eyes, this wasn’t bad enough for him.

“But I’m glad I knew you before we chose the grade captain.”

Sakura looked down at Kiryuu, his eyebrows furrowed by that slightly unpleasant smile. It never changed.

Sakura had only seen Kiryuu look sad a few times, like when he couldn't help his sister or was too shocked to react. Kiryuu had shown a look of despair and pain when he stuttered to call an ambulance, and Tsugeura, the big guy, had been frozen the entire time Sakura was on the ground or when he was being carried away. They were shocked, too shocked to react, and Sakura couldn't quite remember what they said.

"Give me your contact number."

Kiryuu smiled and suggested. Sakura was silent for a moment, then handed him the phone. Sakura had learned that overreacting to Kiryuu or Suo only made them want to deliberately annoy him.

Nirei took the opportunity, "I want it too!!"

They took the phone from Sakura, looked at his contacts, blinked, and blinked again.

"Only one number saved..." They laughed, "Weather?"

...

Suo patted his shoulder again, Sakura turned away embarrassedly. Come on, this isn't funny at all!!

The three of them chuckled, Kiryuu joked as he saved the number, "Now if I need to know the weather, all I have to do is ask Sakura, right?"

In truth, they could have asked Sakura that. Since Sakura always checked the weather, he didn't want to be the one who broke his promise so soon.

"Here." Kiryuu returned the phone, Sakura quickly took it back embarrassedly.

"I'm going home!"

"Huh? Wait, Sakura, you haven't answered the previous question yet!!"

Sakura raised his eyebrows, "What question?"

"The wounds, where do they come from?" That worried gaze turned back and looked straight at Sakura. There were now five pairs of eyes waiting for him.

Sakura frowned, he shook Nirei's hand off his, "Just a thief."

"Thief!?"

Suo and Sugishita looked unconvinced, Nirei and Kiryuu were also suspicious. Sakura wouldn't let them do that.

"Yeah, so don't worry."

Sakura left, leaving behind all the voices of his friends. He didn't want to hear it anymore, no matter how much they cared about him, this was none of their business.

They didn't need to know and didn't need to care.

Sakura wasn't alone, the landlord couple already knew. So he don't need any more people to participate in this.

This kid wanted to face it himself, Sakura was just doing it for him.

[January 24

They have been away from home for two days.]

Chapter Text

[January 27

They just got back, they look pretty happy.

I wonder if they cooked anything good tonight.

I hope they have leftovers.

The last time I ate was yesterday morning, at least the money I earned on the street kept me from starving.]

After walking for a while, Sakura stopped, turned back to look at the path he had just taken. He felt guilty for refusing his friend's kindness, but he also didn't want to accept it.

It wasn't that Sakura hated it. He had long since accepted his friends.

It was just that the people here gave Sakura a feeling of being unfamiliar, and even if he wanted to trust them, he couldn't trust them yet. Sakura sighed and continued walking.

Maybe one day, when Sakura can once again place his trust in them. Until then, he would temporarily solve his own problems.

Sakura pulled up his hood and continued on the path he had to take.

He passed the bakery just now, glanced at it, and raised his eyebrows. Where was the landlady?

Did she really bring all those things back herself!?

Thinking of that, Sakura hurriedly ran back to the landlady's house.

The landlord was thinking, trying to understand the structure of the house that the architect had given him, hearing the hurried footsteps, he stopped and looked up.

"Oh, Sakura."

Sakura gasped, he quickly asked: "Where is she??"

"Who? My wife? She's inside, cooking." The landlord quickly replied, waving his hand to dispel Sakura's worries. He pulled Sakura back, showing him the blueprint, "Forget it, look at this. Do you like it?"

Sakura blinked, no matter how many times he looked at it, he still couldn't understand this blueprint.

The architect looked at him, then he chuckled. Sakura was startled and blushed, he stammered, "W-what?"

"Nothing." The architect said, moving the blueprint closer to Sakura, slinging his arm over his shoulder and being careful not to touch the bruise as he ruffled his hair.

Sakura frowned, trying to understand what the architect said. The workers around him chuckled as Sakura stuttered as he tried to repeat himself.

The landlord sighed, he smiled and glanced at his wife, who was looking out curiously. They looked at each other and exchanged smiles.

After trying to understand but failing, Sakura blushed amidst everyone's laughter. He stuttered, shouted out an excuse to go to the bathroom and rushed inside.

Sakura quickly locked the door, he ruffled his hair, grumbled and blamed it on the super confusing words in the blueprint.

It took a long time for Sakura to calm down, he ruffled his hair in frustration and slicked it back, revealing the faded roots. Sakura looked at the mirror, frowning.

It's pretty hard to re-dye his hair in this situation, and his stuff isn't here either. Sakura rubbed his eyes again, his eyes were getting redder and redder from wearing contact lenses for too long. Luckily, they hadn't moved into his eye sockets while he slept, but unfortunately, they were affecting his other pain.

Sakura became annoyed, he took out his phone and glanced at the time. It was now ten o'clock, the workers outside had already started working.

He unlocked the screen, hesitated on the communication app, then turned off the phone. Repeated like that many times.

Sakura repeatedly tapped the standby screen for no reason, he nervously ran his fingernails over the old phone screen, pursed his lips, and bit it.

It wasn't until the landlady called Sakura that Sakura realized he had been in the bathroom for thirty minutes.

When Sakura went out, the landlady glanced at him quickly and gave a small smile, "I'm done cooking, come in and eat."

Sakura hesitantly nodded, he sat at the table with the couple. The landlady and her husband pretended not to care, but they both noticed how Sakura ate less than usual.

[February 8th

Mother angrily smashes things

Father tries to comfort her, but he looks annoyed as he does so.

Anyway, I met a rather strange person today. He was wearing a white shirt and smelled like a hospital.

I didn't like him very much so I ran away when he tried to talk to me.

I think that's quite rude? The girl next to him said so.]

"..." 

Sakura held his chopsticks in his mouth, remaining silent. The TV continued to play, the purring of the calico cat mixed with the sound of the landlord and his wife talking. Sakura's silence was just a small, lonely note in this noisy, bustling world.

_____

"Sakura, is the water cold?"

Momo brought out a plate of apples, she stopped at the door, blinked, blinked, and blinked again.

The landlord saw that it had suddenly become quiet outside, so he walked out: "Oi-"

Sakura looked at them, his two-toned hair was wet, still dripping onto the towel. He looked straight at them with those two-toned eyes, looking like a cat assessing the situation. Sakura moved his lips, then carefully said: "Sorry for hiding it from you."

Sakura had been helped by everyone in his previous life on how to respond to the kindness of others, this time he responded on his own without being taught.

"I hope you two don't find it strange." Sakura scratched the back of his neck, a slightly wavering but steady smile formed by his determination.

The landlord couple stood there for a long time, they blinked quickly and then frowned slightly, awkwardly approaching Sakura and touching his hair. Sakura bent down to let Mrs. Momo pet him. He had washed his hair thoroughly, there wouldn't be any black dye on her hands.

Momo stammered and pulled her hand back, placing it on his cheek, using her index finger to touch the corner of Sakura's eyes. She stared into his eyes and sniffed slightly.

"Your eyes are so beautiful..."

Sakura choked up, he placed his hand on the back of her hand, gently replying, "Yes, thank you."

The landlord raised his eyebrows, looked at Sakura as a whole, and sighed. Sakura glanced at him, hesitantly pursed his lips.

"It's good to be honest." The landlord said, looking up and patting his tense shoulders. "I'm glad you told us."

Sakura's lips trembled, and he let out a slightly wet laugh. Sakura nodded, "Yes."

Although he had prepared himself for their reactions, Sakura couldn't help but feel relieved that a stone had been lifted from his heart.

Mrs. Momo tilted her head, "Sakura, are you crying?"

"Wha- I'm not crying!!" Sakura stuttered and then screamed with red eyes, he backed away, startled as if burned when he hit the door. Sakura ran, the laughter of the landlord couple was worth the hit.

"Hurry up and come back to eat apples, Sakura!"

Sakura groaned but clearly did not refuse the call. He approached the door of the room, where the landlord couple had arranged for him to stay temporarily. Sakura slowed down and stopped, he adjusted his emotions, exhaled and finally pushed the door aside.

The Japanese style room is scattered with small cardboard boxes, there are so few of them that the room feels strangely empty. Sakura remembered that in his previous life when he came to Makochi, there was even less stuff like this.

Sakura groaned softly, having to remember how the people in Makochi constantly attacked his house and filled it up was annoying.

Sakura plopped down on the old futon, crossed his arms and sighed. He opened his eyes, tilted his head to look at the small box on top, Sakura reached out to grab it.

There were quite a few bottles of dye in there, in fact he had accidentally grabbed the empty ones in his haste.

Sakura picked up the empty bottles and put them aside, he rummaged through the bottom of the box and picked out the contact lens cases, Sakura found one without lenses.

He opened the lid and rummaged through his pocket to take out two contact lenses that he had crumpled. Sakura looked at them, frowned, and threw them at the empty dye bottles.

He found a few more strange things.

Sakura found a strange medicine bottle and a few razor blades, most of them unused. Sakura grimaced, a sharp pain in his stomach making him want to throw up.

This fucking stupid kid.

Sakura muttered under his breath, packing up the razor blades, too tired to be angry with the kid. The child's weakness annoyed Sakura, in the end his anger was not directed at that child.

Sakura took the diary, he tore off the blank page and put the blades in it, wrapped them up and finally put them back in the bottom of the box. Then he put the contact lenses on it, the remaining blank space Sakura arranged the dye bottles. Finally put the medicine bottle in the corner of the box.

After finishing Sakura closed the box, he looked at the box in front of him, his eyes narrowed, seemingly thinking about something.

Sakura opened the diary, he searched each page and placed it on the cardboard box. He reached for another box, rummaging for a pen.

Sakura found an old pencil, he looked at it for a moment then turned back to the diary. Sakura put the pencil tip down, crossed out a line.

• Stop hurting yourself.

• ...

He turned the page again and continued to cross out.

○ Tell someone about your problem:

• Let someone know your true appearance.

• ...

Sakura didn't touch the rest of the lines, he closed the diary and put it and the pen in the box. Sakura stood up, put the box in the closet and walked out of the room.

This was still just the beginning for both of them.

...

That year was in the spring.

She saw her neighbor fumbling around on the roof of the barn. No, it was their son, that weird kid trying to do something.

The kid leaned over, looking down timidly. She saw him holding something down.

"Alright." The boy muttered, kneeling down and releasing the thing in his arms.

It was a crow. Why was that unlucky creature there? Fuck it, that weird kid even brought that creature home.

Wasn't his mother pregnant? She had to tell her to stay away from the child.

What a pair of similar misfortunes.

The woman spat at them.

In the yard, the kid hesitantly pressed the towel against the crow's waist. The crow jerked, making a weak sound, its black eyes staring at the boy.

"Hey, it's okay." The child stroked its head gently, his fingers brushing across its eyes, helping the crow close its eyes.

The crow stopped moving, the child backed away. He sat there, slowly exhaling, slowly picking up the crow and wrapping it in a towel.

Sakura went somewhere that afternoon, people only knew that he came back with an injured finger and a lot of dirt.

...

Sakura frowned, blinked, and then blinked again.

There were only five people in the group at this time, and when they saw Sakura looking at it but not sending any message, they started making a fuss.

▪︎Nirei: Sakura, are you okay?

Suo sent a greeting sticker and added:

▪︎Suo: You made everyone worried.

▪︎Kiryuu: Is the grade captain going to school today?

Sakura raised his eyebrows, why did they decide that he was the grade captain?

Last time, they had turned Sakura around like a top and shoved the grade captain sign into his hands, no matter how much he denied it. This time, they didn't make things difficult for Sakura, because they directly threw the grade captain sign at his face.

▪︎Nirei: Are you going to school today?

The others chimed in to ask Sakura more questions, but the meaning of their sentences was not much different from Nirei's.

Sakura was about to answer yes out of habit, but he stopped and looked up at himself in the mirror.

The bruises still looked really bad. This might make people worry and... What did Umemiya call it?

Neglecting yourself?

Sakura didn't think he would want to go to school with these injuries anyway, and he... hated having to lie to his friends again.

Sakura sighed, glanced back at the messages from everyone in the group. He was silent, thought for a moment, and then texted back.

No.

Sakura then turned off him phone and put it on the sink, ignoring the way it kept ringing and bending down, grabbing a bottle of dye.

Okay, let's start another bad day.

Since he didn't go to school, Sakura hung around with the landlord's cat near the apartment that was being renovated. At first, he intended to help but was completely rejected by all of them.

So now Sakura was here, sitting on the porch and eating sweets with Tama, the landlord's cat who was lying on his lap.

It was almost noon now, Sakura didn't do anything but sit here. He occasionally looked up at the wind chime above his head, absent-mindedly, like a person who had lost his soul, then lay down on the wooden floor.

Tama on his lap moved, it opened one eye to look at Sakura and arched its back, lying on Sakura's stomach.

Sakura reached out to stroke its fur, the cat immediately made a satisfied sound, purring and rubbing its head against the fabric of his shirt.

The wind chimes clanged together, sparkling under the sunlight. In the distance, there was the sound of workers transporting bricks and sand, they nudged each other's hips, laughing and joking about something.

Sakura remembered his image in his previous life, when he was already a second year. Their school welcomed a lot of first year students, those kids always seemed to find a way to surround Sakura, they were both annoying and interesting.

Nirei and Suo became the two people who always accompanied him, Sakura laughed more, his laughter could easily blend in with everyone's atmosphere. Sakura was no longer shy about his laughter, he became more comfortable with his friends.

No longer avoiding physical contact or avoiding friendly greetings.

At that time, Sakura thought he was lucky, all the pain of the past in exchange for this place was probably worth it.

Until that scene completely collapsed.

Sakura could still feel the taste of blood on the tip of his tongue just like that day. The way his body stiffened and painfully held in a pool of blood made his mind strangely blank.

Was Sakura afraid?

Yes, he was afraid. He was afraid of seeing their tears, afraid of seeing the panic in their eyes, afraid of the unclear sounds, afraid of Nirei's desperate pleas.

Afraid of Suo's panicked look.

Afraid of Kryuu and Tsugeura's pale faces.

Afraid of everyone's trembling fingers.

Afraid of his friends' trembling voices.

Afraid of Hiiragi's trembling back and frightened gasps.

Afraid of Sugishita's dull and confused eyes.

Afraid of Kotoha and Umemiya's hurried figures.

Afraid of all of their looks.

And Sakura was afraid of death.

Death came to him too quickly and then immediately left as if it had never happened. Death also wrapped up all of Sakura's efforts and left him behind, treating him as an easily controlled creature.

Sakura was too shocked to grieve for his own death.

Maybe it wasn't that serious. He was alive again anyway.

Maybe it wouldn't matter if he did it again, Sakura just needed to try to put his trust in them again.

It wouldn't matter if he suffered a little more.

Sakura felt that he was still a little luckier than himself in this world anyway.

His parents were pretty bad, but not in that kind of crazy, asshole way. Otherwise... it seemed like outside of the family background, there wasn't much difference in how outsiders treated them. The insults, the mockery of Sakura, and the constant pushing and trampling on him had haunted Sakura for decades.

He thought he had forgotten, had escaped it, had reached the light, but unexpectedly, there was another chain under his feet. They dragged Sakura back, stuffed more pain into his head, and forced him back into the quagmire of despair.

Sakura could see that this body's mentality was much weaker than his, but surprisingly, he didn't hate it too much. It wasn't his fault anyway.

Maybe, just maybe, would Sakura go crazy with both memories one day?

They had tortured him too much, almost causing him to lose sleep and have panic attacks many times. Feeling nauseous, the nightmares kept him distracted.

Now the taste of flour and cream in Sakura's mouth made him shiver, Sakura stopped eating and tried to swallow the chewing part in his mouth.

It was hard to keep a stable mind in this state. Maybe Sakura should try talking to a psychologist. After all, in his previous life, he had (forced by his friends) met them a few times.

...

A few lines of memories of the hospital flashed through Sakura's mind, making him want to give up on that thought again.

Damn it, Sakura is going to go crazy! ----

Meow

Sakura stopped, he slowly removed his hands from his face, blinking rapidly to regain a clearer vision.

Meow

Tama flicked his ears, looked up, and made an unhappy sound at the new appearance. His ears were facing back, his attitude somewhat hostile.

Sakura frowned, he opened his mouth and closed it again, raised his eyebrows and narrowed his eyes. Finally, Sakura hesitantly said: "Risa?"

The white cat let out a meow in response: Meoww!

Why is this cat here??

The cat moved towards his stomach, Tama growled and backed away, Risa moved closer to it.

"Hey, hey, don't fight on my stomach!!" Sakura warned in panic, he could see how Tama was preparing to pounce and Risa was squinting.

What are these two cats trying to do!?

Suddenly a figure jumped over the fence and appeared in front of them, all three of them turned to look. Sakura blinked, his tired hands trembling unconsciously.

On the other side, Kaji stood up and dusted off his knees, he looked up, the words he was about to say got stuck in his throat. Kaji frowned, he paused for a moment and then spoke:

"You're Sakura, right?"