Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Warning in tags.

~~

Sang Woo would much prefer sitting in a quiet library or in his familiar and safe bed. But , no, this was his reality. Sitting on the cold , concrete floor, not being able to tell if it was rain or tears pouring down his face. It was most likely rain, he had already cried his eyes out until he could cry no longer. He was sitting on the bare ground, trying to cover himself as much as possible. He felt revolting and badly want to tear his own guts apart whilst the creamy, traumatising fluid seemed to pour and pour out of an area he hadn't imagined anyone other than his lover touching. Sunbae wasn't his lover. 

It all so started sweet, but sweet things turn sour overtime, right? He didn't think it'd be the same with him and sunbae. It was all an innocent studying session, no? An innocent thing is bound to turn dark soon enough, and it did. The sweet studying session between the two turned into more of a nightmare than a studying session. It all happened so quickly and as soon as Sang Woo opened his eyes again he was being pushed onto the bed by a man 4 years older than him. His 16 year old self could never fight against someone nearly a foot taller than him and despite knowing this, Sang Woo tried. He bit, kicked ,slapped, screamed, anything to stop the following events. But , obviously, his efforts were in vain as it only caused him more pain. His heart beat faster than ever, not because he was scared but because he was angered beyond imagination. 

~~

That was 5 years ago, and Sang Woo hadn't changed much. Opening up to his parents about it would be like trying to speak to a wall. They would not care. Probably say he deserved it. Or the most amount of concern would them asking "what were you wearing?" 

Though it was years ago, somewhere that had been shoved away and forgotten, remembered every detail about what his assaulter had done to him.

Well, currently Sang Woo was waiting for a goddamn designer to hurry up. His legs were crossed under the table and things kept neatly in front of him. His eyes were as dull as ever as he looked down at his watch. 9:15. A whole hour late, wow. He didn't think someone could be so stupid to be late on their first and last time meeting someone. A click at the door was what brought Sang Woo back to reality. The designer, well, looked like a designer. His denim jacket littered with doodles, random words and drawings. He did look the part. "You're the designer, I assume?" Sang Woo asked, raising his eyebrow and folding his arms. "I didn't think you'd be handsome..Yeah , I am." He grinned , putting out his hand but retracting it quickly when Sang Woo glared at him. He sat, slouching in the chair. 

Sang Woo groaned in his head. 

"You know my name, no?" He , Jang Jae Young, asked, smirking stupidly. "Yes. Do y-" Sang Woo was interrupted mid sentence by Jae Young grabbing the blue paper, messing the set-up of his pencil case and books in the process. "Wow, this is really..something..Usually, Suyoungs work is amazing. Guess she didn't put a lot of effort into this," Jae Young deadpanned. Wow.

"Listen, I don't think we should work toge-" Yet again, cut off by Jae Young leaning back in his chair followed with a sigh. "Could you really build anything I ask for?" He said , leaning forward yet again. "As long as the design's good. I can build almost any function a 2D action game needs." Sang Woo replied, glancing at Jae Young. 

He smirked.

"Hah, quite the confidence you got there," Jae Young grinned. "Do you have any experience developing mobile games?" Sang Woo asked, honestly fed up with his confidence. I mean, to show up an hour late to a meeting and then act all confident and unmannerly was just something, no?

"None."

That was the dead giveaway to where he could leave and get out of this conversation. "I'll be going then." Sang Woo bowed, going to stand up. "I'm pretty experienced it web development, though." He added.

Well if he's good at Web UI, he'd have no problem developing apps..

"Can I have your number?" Jae Young inquired, tilting his head. Sang Woo nodded, passing over his phone. Entering his number , Jae Young smirked. 'FREELOADER 3'

"You already have my number saved." Jae Young said, tilting the phone to show Sang Woo. Seeing the words, Sang Woo sighed. Oh god. Jae Young rang the number , picking up his phone and showing his screen. 'MOTHERFUCKER.' 

"It was about we met, huh, hoobaenim?" Jae Young smirked sliding the phone back over to Sang Woo. Sang Woo sighed, standing up and getting ready to leave. Jae Young put his foot out, stopping Sang Woo, before standing up himself. "What? No apology?" Jae Young asked, glaring dead at him. "You apologise when you've done something wrong." Jae Young scoffed.

"Yeah, you have. You're the fucking reason I can't fucking graduate," he said, towering over him. "It's not my problem, that's yours. You attended none of our meetings so you had it coming." Sang woo rolled his eyes, trying to step out of the way but being stopped by his wrist being grabbed. Fuck.

He had a tight grip, making it difficult to pull back. "I had it coming? Really?" Jae Young smiled to himself, "alright then , hoobae. Is there anyone you don't like?"

"You."

"Any colour you hate?"

"Red." The colour of errors.

"Anywhere you hate?"

"A 10 metre radius of you, now can you let g-" Jae Young laughed. "Alright then , you wacko. I'll make sure your life's a living hell, sound good?" Jae Young removed his hand , putting them in his pockets.

~~

Chapter Text

~~

Jae Young was being serious about making his life hell and he was doing a good job at it. Sang Woo had been struggling to breathe , the airflow in the seat he was sitting in was off and he couldn’t hear the teacher because of the loud ringing in his ears. Jae Young was busy pissing Sang Woo off by drawing stupid drawings on a notebook. The last he struggled to breathe this much was when…no, no , no..don’t think about that. He tried to clear his mind quickly before the memories could form. So,  he focused his attention on the professor, his breathing being more irregular. 

The class , thankfully, had ended and Sang Woo quickly tried to collect his things so he could get the fuck out of there but feeling a tall, towering figure behind him wasn’t good. A quite heavy arm was swung around his shoulder, bringing Sang Woo closer to Jae Young. “Where ya’ heading next, Sang Woo-yah?” He asked, tilting his head to look at him. Sang Woo’s eyes were wide and his breath was rapid, trying his best to not drop all his things in the middle of the hall and have a panic attack. He needed to get out of there , fast. “What? Is there something on my face? Hah, you looked as if you’ve seen a ghost. Ah, Sang Woo-ya, are you scared of ghosts?”

Badump. Badump. Badump…

It’s if the world has stopped, darkness wrapping around his vision. He felt himself drop to the floor. Jae Young probably in shock. At least he didn’t have to deal with getting touched anymore. 

~~

He was drenched in a sticky substance, sweat. Ew. Waking up, his head ached. Where the hell was he? This wasn’t his apartment. He looked around, trying to see if there was anything around him. A bright yellow sticky note on the table next to a glass of water. He looked at it. 

“Hey , Sang Woo-yah. You passed out. Well, I guess you already know that. Anyways, I have something to do so I’ll be back in an hour. Drink some water and , oh, this doesn’t mean that I won’t torment you anymore.”

Sang Woo rolled his eyes. Aw, thanks. He reached out for the glass of water , his hands shaking. He took a sip and as soon as it went down his throat he felt like throwing up. God. Right now , his mind was like a battlefield with a world war going on in it. He sighed , looking at his shaking hands. There was a clock in the room. It didn’t have much furniture, just the basic necessities. I didn’t think Jae Young was a minimalist. Oh, wait, didn’t he just move here to torment me.. 

Tik..tok..tik..tok..tik..

The sounds of the clock were familiar, too familiar. That’s when his breathing started to race again. Sunbae had a clock, it was white and has Roman numerals instead of numbers. His legs trembled. Why? Why me?..god..

He couldn’t believe that he had just stopped fighting and let sunbae put that thing of his inside of him. Was it really his fault? He had taken online therapy because he just couldn’t stand to talk about it in real life. The therapists all made it seem like if he didn’t ‘lead him on’ he would’ve still been that bubbly boy. He was asking for it, no? 

Looking at his own arms , the slits down his wrist which were usually always covered by his sweatshirts , seemed like the brightest, most noticeable thing in this world. Hearing the door open, Jae Young entered. “Ah, you’re alive! I thought you might’ve died.” I would’ve been happy if I did. “Did you have the water? I didn’t poison , I swear.” I wish you would’ve. “I’m such a kind sunbae , huh? I could’ve just left you there. See? I’m not mean.” 

Please shut up.

Jae Young smirked , sitting down next to Sang Woo. “You know, you’re quite light and easy to carry, probably cuz you’re short, hah.” Jae Young snickered. “Do you feel better? Why did you pass out?” He asked, leaning forward. “I…don’t know? I just did.” 

Sang Woo grabbed the glass of water , contemplating whether he should throw it at Jae Young or not. Instead, he drank it, coolness slipping down his throat. He felt even more nauseous, knowing that once his throat had been used for a different kind of ‘swallowing’. He shuddered, trying to make the thought disappear. “Didn’t expect you to be a cute sleeper.” He laughed. 

Sang Woo shuddered , he hated being called cute. “I’m not, shut up.” He said, looking away and at the glass cup. “Shut up? Really? Not even a thank you? Wow.” 

I don’t want to thank you, you’re the reason I even passed out..

“Um, by the way..” Jae Young mumbled, suddenly losing his confidence. 

What?

~~ 

cliffhanger😱 

Chapter Text

~~

"You know what, never mind." Jae Young said, looking down but then looking back up at Sang Woo with a grin. The hell?

"You're so pretty up close.." Jae Young laughed, coming closer to Sang Woo. Why did Sang Woo feel so...bubbly in his stomach. Why did he like this? Was his body malfunctioning? Usually, if anyone got this close to him he'd back away in fear , but no. He liked seeing Jae Young's face up close and he felt his cheeks heating up and he was...never mind.

Jae Young reached his hand up to his cheek and caressed down to his lip. Normally, Sang Woo would’ve jumped back but he stayed, frozen in place. Jae Young’s thumb ghosted over Sang Woo’s lips and then he removed his hand. Sang Woo pouted, wanted more. He was really going crazy,no? Jae Young sat back, smirking to himself. “What? Did you like that?” 

Those words were the ones that snapped him back to reality. Jae Young had touched him. Touched him. Touched? Touch? He touched me..

His hands began to tremble , breathing heavier and his eyes going wide.  Touch, Sang Woo’s least favourite thing. “Sang Woo, you ok? Don’t faint again, what the fuck?” Jae Young said, leaning forward, putting his hand on Sang Woo’s shoulder. Sang Woo yelped, shoving the hand away. Jae Young seemed to be confused. I mean, who wouldn’t be. Sang Woo breathing hitched as he felt light headed. His breathing slowing down and his hands shaking less. “Sang Woo, you ok?”

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

5 years ago.

~~

Chu Sang Woo was known as the bubbly, adorable boy in high school whom everybody adored. His smile was known to literally light up a room and make anybody happy. He was a star student, never getting in trouble and even bullies had mild crushes on him. There was a certain person he was the closest to. His sunbae, Seungho. Seungho was Sang Woo’s best friend. He helped him through anything, even with his family problems. Sang Woo couldn’t have been any stupider. 

Seungho had offered to study with Sang Woo at his house, it was an innocent offer. “But hyung, this doesn’t even make any sense.” Sang Woo pouted. “It does make sense, idiot. I’ll teach you, k?” Sang Woo nodded. The warm, comforting hand of Seungho’s travelled up his thigh and next to his crotch. Sang Woo looked up at Seungho who had a smirk plastered on his face. “Hyung, what are you doing?” He asked, leaning backward and looking at the intruding hand. “Sangie, you know how pretty you are?” Seungho asked, leaning in , his hand travelling directly onto his crotch. “Um, hyung..” Sang Woo pushed back, confusion tattooed on his face. 

“Sang Woo , have you ever had sex before?” He asked, Sang Woo becoming more confused and scared? “Ah, what am I talking about. Someone as pretty as you must’ve slept around once or twice, no?” 

“Hyung, I haven’t..I’ve never..slept with anybody.” Sang Woo stated , looking around , uncomfortably. 

“I can change that.”

What?

~~

It’s short ..I’m sorry lol