Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Paedyn

It has been a week. A week since Kai professed his love to me. A week since he planned for my escape. A week since we got caught and taken to the king.

A week since I have had a fiancé.

A fiancé that I do not love. A fiancé that I am forced to have.

There was nothing I could do. If I had said no, I most likely would have been killed on the spot.

I couldn’t look Kai in the eyes. It hurt too much. To most, it looked like he did not care. But to me, there was a slight crack in that mask he spent so many years perfecting. A crack only I could see.

I haven’t seen Kai since then. I haven’t really seen anyone since then. Not even my new fiancé.

Kai is definitely going to hate me. He probably already hates me. He laid himself bare for me with his words on the field and this is how I repay him.

I regret not escaping when he told me to. That would have hurt him less.

I felt safe with Kai. Even when he chained me to him so I could not escape, I felt safe. Now, even if I find a way out of this, I will never feel that again. Never feel loved by him again.

Kitt must have a motive behind this. Jealousy maybe? That is the only thing that I can think of. But right now, I cannot even think straight myself.

It has been a week. I need to get over myself.

I then hear a knock on my door.

“Your presence has been requested for dinner, my lady.”

I can safely assume that this is Ellie. She is the only other person I have seen since after the proposal. She was my maid for the trials, and I am so glad she is still here.

“Come in Ellie,” I say as I quickly put the ring that Kitt proposed with on my left hand, “And please just call me Paedyn. You know what.”

I never wear the ring when I am alone. I cannot bring myself to. It feels like I am betraying Kai. Actually, I know I am betraying him, but I need to pretend.

Pretend.

That word. That word Kai and I used to justify our feelings. None of that was pretend. Now I really must pretend. Pretend to be in love with his brother so I do not get killed. So I do not get Kai killed.

I look to where Ellie is standing patiently, waiting for me to address her.

“What will I be wearing tonight?”

Ellie walks over to the armoire. It is not my armoire because it lacks the one thing that would make it mine.

Adena.

“The king has requested this dress.” Ellie grabs a bright green dress out of the armoire.

It is a hideous colour and I just know what Adena would say at this moment.

She would say that I am not meant to blend in with the rest and then demand I wear something she crafted up.

I feel a sting in my eyes as I blink back the tears that threaten to fall.

“Of course,” I sigh. I must play the part. Play the part of the quiet queen-to-be. My life depends on it.

I have always been good at acting, but this time around, I am struggling. Struggling to act as if my real love is not here in the same castle as me. Struggling to act as if I am in love with the person I am not in love.

I quietly step into the dress and allow Ellie to put my hair into an intricate updo.

※※※

Dinner was horrible. Kitt sat at the head of the table and pulled out a chair for me next to him. A few people that I did not recognise as well as a couple of familiar faces such as Jaxon were already there.

A few minutes later Kai had shown up. His inky waves were scattered over his forehead and his steel grey eyes were weary-looking. The dark circles marred the tan skin beneath his eyes which confirmed his lack of sleep and most likely mirrored my own.

The only seat that had been available by the time he arrived was opposite my own. That meant I had to spend my dinner avoiding eye contact with the man I had fallen for.

Throughout dinner, Kitt was attempting conversation with me, but I could not remember a single word he had said. I would nod and smile occasionally to make it seem like I was interested. That was the best I could do.

It hurt. Hurt that I had to put on the mask in front of Kai. Hurt that he also had to put his mask on. It just hurt.

I feel like I am suffocating. Even though I have a massive room to sleep in, I feel suffocated. Even though I am in this massive castle, I feel suffocated.

I have to get out.

I forgo the sleep that has yet to come since I collapsed into bed as soon as I was out of that hideous dress and walked over to the window.

My eyes scan the outside area and I spot a tree. Not just any tree. The willow tree.

I opened the window and carefully climbed out and started to make my way to the ground. Thankful for my training, I climbed down the edge of the castle and stayed in the shadows to avoid any imperials that may be guarding my way to freedom.

But freedom was not my goal just yet. I slowly make my way over towards the tree and see a figure there. I should be scared of getting caught, but I know exactly who is there.

Shaking from the cold, I make my way over to the ebony-haired man who I had fallen for.

“I want to escape.”

Chapter Text

Kai

Why did he do it? Why did he take the one thing that I had to myself? Why her? He could have anyone, yet he chose the girl that he very clearly loathed.

My own brother had me chasing around, looking for this girl, facing death on more than one occasion, just so he could marry her.

He really has gone crazy.

It has been a week. A week since my world started looking up, then with just a few words from the king, came falling right back down right before my eyes.

I have not seen her since then. I have not seen her beautiful silver hair which might not be long anymore, but still shines brightly in the sun. I have not seen those freckles that I have counted on so many occasions while watching her peacefully sleep. I have not seen those bright blue eyes that rival the beauty of forget-me-nots.

I have no idea what she is feeling at this moment. And that is no one’s fault but my own.

It was me who chained us together so she could not escape. It was me who led her here to this fate.

It’s all my fault.

Kitt on the other hand has changed since the last time I saw him. He looks like he is handling his grief better and is finally looking after himself. Well as much as he can. But there is something off about him.

Where did his determination to marry Paedyn come from?

There was something behind his decision and right now the only thing I can chalk it up to is craziness.

I cannot think of any other reason.

What would the people of Ilya think of his decision? They despise her for her actions against the former king. While those actions were justified - and I knew that - it won’t matter to everyone else.

This whole situation is mind-boggling and I cannot think straight. I honestly should not be surprised because I have never been able to think straight when it comes to Paedyn.

While I have seen Kitt many times throughout the week, I have not had the chance to speak to him alone. He has been so busy that I doubt he has even seen his fiancé.

His fiancé.

It made me sick. She did not want this. She could not want it. Not after the words we shared on that field.

Or maybe I was just in denial. This has to be able to work out though. I cannot just sit around and watch Pae fall in love with my brother, no matter how much of it was actually pretend.

But I cannot go against her wishes either. This is her life we are talking about. If I acted irrationally, they would not hesitate to execute her. And probably me as well, but she is my main concern.

※※※

Dinner was torture. I was the last to arrive and the only seat available was right across from Paedyn. The very woman I have fallen for that is out of my reach.

Kitt droned on the entire time, mostly talking to Pae, who was nodding along and smiling like she was listening, but I knew she wasn’t. My problem was that I could not keep my eyes off her.

Her hair was in an intricate updo despite the new short length, and her skin was pale. There were purple bruises that were very discernible under her blue eyes which had lost their glimmer.

Then there was that dress. She obviously looked stunning, as per usual, but she was wearing green. She was wearing the Ilya colour, and it did not suit her. She was made to stand out and this dress was doing nothing for her in that regard.

I knew she definitely did not choose to wear it, which meant that Kitt was making her wear it. It meant Kitt was trying to force her to be something she was not.

He was trying to control her.

When he dismissed everyone, I stayed back. Since I have not been able to speak to him privately, I decided now was the perfect opportunity to ask him what the fuck he is doing.

With everyone gone, I voiced my need to speak to him and then followed him to his office.

“What are you doing?” I demand, trying to keep my cool.

He looks up from his work which he immediately went to as soon as we got into the room. “What do you mean?” He looks confused which could be an act to cover some plan.

What am I talking about? This is Kitt. He has to have some sort of good reason for doing this. He would not be doing this without a good reason. Would he?

I take a deep breath to calm myself down before saying, “What are you planning with the girl.”

I refrain from using her name. I cannot have Kitt being even more suspicious about something between us.

“There is no plan. I want her to be my wife and that is the end of this discussion,” he says with an edge to his voice. He’s hiding something, I can tell. “You told me yourself you do not care for her so it should not matter what I am doing anyway.”

It takes great effort not to allow my mask to slip.

“Was there anything else you wanted to discuss?”

He was definitely up to something. It is so unlike him, but it is the only explanation. Or else he really is just going crazy. But I refuse to believe it. Whether his plan is for good or for bad I must find out.

“No that was all.”

I walk out of there and instead of going to my room, I end up under the willow tree.

So many memories are tied to this one area.

I call off the imperials who are around the area to allow me some privacy. The privacy that allows me to let my mask fall.

I have no idea how long I have been out here when I hear a voice. Her voice.

“I want to escape.”

I whip my head around to see my pretty Pae. Not really mine anymore though.

I cannot think of what to say when she comes closer and says, “I can’t do this.”

She looks overwhelmed. Her breath is short, and she is shaking from the cold. “What’s wrong darling?”

That is when she snaps. The sound she makes breaks my heart a little and although I cannot see her details in the dark, I can tell her face is stained with tears. She collapses and I am just able to catch her and hold her close to me.

“Hey, hey it’s okay Pae,” I whisper as I stroke up and down her back to try and comfort her.

“No, it's not okay Kai,” she sobs into my chest, “I can’t do it.”

“Take some deep breaths then explain to me.”

Pae takes a few shaky deep breaths but stays silent.

I decide it is best not to push her in this moment and I grab one of her hands that had found its way around my neck, playing with my hair. I open her palm and bring her hand to my mouth, pressing kisses along the surface, moving until I get to her thumb where I kiss the pad of it softly, just like I did with Ava.

After a minute or an hour of us just sitting in silence, Pae takes a deep breath and says quietly, “I cannot pretend to be in love with Kitt.”

“What do you mean?” I inquire, only moving my attention away from her hand to talk to her, “You did just fine pretending with me.”

Although I cannot see her face, I know she is glaring at me with her beautiful ocean eyes, “That’s different and you know it.”

“Yeah, yeah, whatever,” I mumble before going back to kissing her thumb.

Then I hear my favourite sound, her laugh. “That tickles,” she giggles as she pulls her hand out of my grasp then leans her head into my chest.

We stay like this for who knows how long, just enjoying our peace together.

“Do you hate me?” Her voice is quiet and unsure.

“How could I ever hate you, darling?”

There is nothing she could do to ever make me hate her. I would know because I have tried. Look where that got me.

She shakes her head, “Are you sure?” I don’t know what brought this on, I made my intentions pretty clear a week ago, “I am literally marrying your brother. You’re supposed to hate me now.”

“Do you want me to hate you, Pae?” I whisper into her ear. “If that’s what you believe would be best, I can stay away.”

She quickly shakes her head. “No. No, no, no. I don’t want you to hate me.”

I cuddle her closer to my chest and my actions make her worries disappear.

“Can you help me get out of here?” she finally says.

“Only if I can come with you.”

Chapter Text

Kitt

Something is going on with Kai. He was obviously lying when he said nothing had happened.

But he could not get in my way. This was for the best. It was the only way.

I was told to do whatever it takes. The words in that letter tell me I have to put Ilya before anything else. It’s like he knew what was going to happen.

But as my brother, Kai would not have lied. He couldn’t have. Not to me. He would not have brought her in otherwise. He had to have been confused about my actions. That is the only possible explanation for my brother’s unusual behaviour this past week.

He wanted answers and I lied to him. I could not let him know what I am doing or why I am doing it. I could not let him find his letter either because I have no doubt he will protest the words.

Suddenly there is a knock at my door.

“Come in,” I command as I quickly hide the letter in the secret compartment of the drawer.

The door opens slowly, almost cautiously which means this is going to be bad news.

Everyone was cautious around me nowadays. They never knew how I would react to something and tread on eggshells around me.

Ellie, who is Paedyn’s maid walks in and closes the door.

“Your majesty,” Ellie curtseys before continuing, “I have come bearing bad news.”

I do not say anything, prompting her to continue.

She hesitates before saying, “Your bride-to-be is missing.”

“What?!” I shout and Ellie flinches from my outburst. “When was the last time you saw her?!”

“At lunchtime, Your Majesty,” she says quietly, bracing herself for my shouting.

Before I can command her to do anything, a terrifying thought pops into my head.

Kai.

Kai probably helped her escape. He probably ran away with her so they could be together. He probably betrayed me. His own brother.

“Find the enforcer and bring him to me,” I demanded without a second thought. I must figure out if he deceived me.

“Of course, your majesty.” She curtseys then hurries out the door.

※※※

I am pacing my office when I hear another knock.

“Come in,” I say and am surprised when I see my brother.

He looks no different to how he has been in the past week. His hair is unkept and bruises taint the skin beneath his eyes.

Kai walks in and closes the door behind him. He looks as if he has no idea what has happened.

This is good. It means he can help get her back.

“You called for me?”

I nod and stop my pacing. “Have you heard the news?”

“I don’t believe I have,” he states calmly.

“My bride has gone missing.” Something flickers in his eyes for a split second before returning to his normal indifference. I shrug it off as I know about how our father trained him and continue, “I am sending you to find her again.”

It is a risky idea, but he is the one who caught her before. He is the only one who even has a slight possibility of finding her and getting her back. And she is the most vital piece for saving Ilya.

Kai nods and takes my lack of words as a dismissal.

“I will not fail you, brother,” he declares as he walks out of the room.

Once he has closed the door, I reach into the secret compartment of the drawer and take the letter back out. I open the letter and let my eyes follow the words on the parchment.

To my dear Kitt,

If you are reading this letter, it means I have met my fate. I urge you not to grieve in my absence. You are now the King of Ilya. Everyone is looking to you to solve the problem of the sickness that has tainted my lands. Your lands. It is now up to you to become the best king possible for your people.

Use Kai as your enforcer. He has been well-trained and will be loyal to you no matter what. Find ways to control those who can be unpredictable. Remember, do not let anything get in the way of you doing what is right for Ilya. It is now your responsibility to keep everyone in check you must do whatever it takes to ensure peace is kept.

Sincerely

Edric Azer

Chapter Text

Paedyn

The plan has so many ways it can go wrong. It is not only risky for me, but very risky for Kai, who has a lot more to lose than I do.

When I voiced my concerns last night, he said that his only concern was me. He assured me that he wanted me to be happy and if that was not going to happen here, then he would do whatever it took to get me out safely.

We decided that I would escape after lunch because that would be when they least expected it. It would also be easiest to settle into the Slums when there are a lot of people outside to blend in.

Before lunch, I discreetly packed a bag of my own clothes and belongings, only taking necessities to ensure I would not be weighed down in my escape.

After lunch, I tie my hair up as best as I can, but with its new length I can only manage a half up half down hairdo, but it keeps it off my face and hidden.

I get the remnants of the skirt Kai and I stole and tie it around my head as a makeshift scarf until I can steal a new one. I then change out of the fancy clothes I was given into a shirt of Kai’s that he ripped up and made dirty as well as my old tatty pants that I was wearing when I came here the first time that Kai found. I tied the laces of my boots tight, then tucked them in so I would not trip on them.

Taking one last look in the mirror to ensure that everything was in place, I move the makeshift scarf to cover everything but my eyes. I look around to make sure I have not left anything behind.

I lock the door and hope it gives me more time before they realise I am gone.

When I walk over to the window, I escaped out of last night I check to see if there are any imperials guarding the ground. There are three in my sight, but they are all facing away from the window.

I open the window and climb out before shutting it. I do not have time to climb down carefully as I had done last night so instead, I jump down into the bush when I feel a twinge of pain in my left ankle.

Silently cursing myself for not packing any medical supplies, I quickly duck into the cover of the bush before any of the imperials can see me.

Once I know I am in the clear, I make my way towards the right side of the castle. I must stay close to the walls so I can escape without anyone seeing me out their windows.

When the Bowl Arena comes into my sight, I look around to see if there are any imperials around. Surprisingly there is not, but I do not allow myself to think too much about it before making a dash for the arena.

Ignoring the throbbing pain in my ankle, I do not stop, even when I get to the bowl. I do, however, turn my run into a brisk walk to not look out of place.

Once I reach the Slums, I do not stop by the fort, instead continuing into Loot Alley. I look around until I find a shop selling scarves. I am about to walk up to the store when I see a black scarf hanging out the back of someone’s pack. It is crowded enough that I can take it without them realising it is gone.

I discreetly make my way over to the woman and tug gently on the scarf until it comes out. I quickly stuff it in my pants and silently thank Kai for his oversized shirt because the woman turns around.

I hold my breath and act normal as she assesses whatever she is looking for. She does not say anything and turns back around as I stride away, back towards the slums.

The only place I can go is the fort as Kai burned my father’s house down. I do not mind the fort but now, there is the attached baggage of Adena.

Adena.

Adena would have been alone here when I left for the trials. Sleeping alone, with no one there for her. The thought brings tears to my eyes as I round the corner to the alley where our fort is. I hold back the tears as I make my way towards the fort, but something is different.

I look around the fort to see what it could possibly be, but then it hits me. It hits me so hard that my lungs fail to do their job.

Adena decorated.

Adena decorated because she knew that I would be coming home. She believed in me. And I let her down. I didn’t save her.

Left alone with my thoughts, I cry until there is nothing left.

※※※

It has been a day since I got here, and I am hungry. Usually, I could go without eating for days. I had gone without eating for so long when I was on the run, but I felt weak.

I know I should not leave the fort yet, but I am sure no one would recognise me if I just stole a couple of sticky buns.

Taking off my makeshift scarf and replacing it with the real one I had stolen yesterday; I am about to leave when I nearly forget what I put in my pack.

My vest.

The olive-green vest that Adena made specially for me. And I vowed I would always wear it. So, I put the vest over Kai’s shirt and make my way out.

The streets are busy again which is good for stealing, but it also increases the chances of someone spotting me. I remove this though from my mind as I make my way over to where the sticky buns are.

I take a split second to decide my best strategy. I pretend I got pushed into the stand and knocked some sticky buns to the floor. I immediately bend down to pick them up and risk only taking one and stuffing it in my vest. The rest I pick up and put back on the table.

“I’m so sorry, sir,” I feign forgiveness as I try to brush the dirt off the buns. “I wasn’t looking where I was going and got pushed.”

“That’s alright dear,” the man says, not realising he is down one bun.

“Is there anything I can do to make it up for ruining the buns?”

“No dear, it is quite alright.” The shop owner is about to turn his attention away but stops and asks me, “I do insist you buy a few, dear.”

I quickly come up with a plausible excuse for not wanting some and say, “I would love to, but I am still full from my own lunch.” To add to the effect, I put a hand on my stomach.

“Well then have a good day.”

“Thank you, sir,” I say and turn to walk away.

Before I can go anywhere, I see someone looking at me. A tall man with brown hair, and I wonder if he saw what I just did. He looks slightly surprised, and his eyes track to my vest.

He knows. He knows there is a stolen sticky bun in my vest, but then he surprises me by averting his gaze away from me.

Maybe he just didn’t realise I stole.

I could not think much about it because I had to get back to the fort.

When I get back, I take the sticky bun out of my vest and eat it, despite the dirt on it from when it was on the ground. I then assess how much honey is in the pocket of my vest and am shocked when there is nothing there.

Nothing happens until late at night.

Not being able to sleep, I look up at the stars like Adena and I used to all the time.

But then I hear some shuffling of footsteps in the dirt. Expecting Kai, I stand up to greet him. But it is not Kai who I am faced with. It is that guy from earlier.

Had he followed me? Only Adena and I ever came here.

I go to grab my dagger, but I was not able to get any weapons before I left. Kai was supposed to bring me weapons.

Instead, I take a defensive stance and ask the stranger, “Who are you?”

The stranger looks confused for a second before shocking me by saying, “Paedyn?”

What the fuck?!

Chapter Text

Kai

I told Paedyn I would get to her as soon as possible. Right now, that is proving hard to accomplish because it is as if no one wants me to leave.

I take slightly longer to pack than I should as I must sneak some weapons for Pae, but I quickly figure out there is no way to take more weapons that I need without raising suspicion. And I do not usually need many weapons.

Then Kitt came to me telling me to take a team of imperials. I had not thought about that when planning so it took some extra time to convince him that they would be useless considering his entire team was killed last time and he was fine on his own.

Then I had to pack an adequate disguise so I would not be recognised when I got to the slums. I packed a shirt of mine that I ripped and made dirty with mud exactly like the one I gave Pae, that I could quickly put over my current clothes. I figured my pants would be fine, and grabbed the mask, not unlike the one I had worn in Dor, and stuffed it in my pack.

I then made my way to the kitchen to grab some of the food I had asked to be made for myself for when I could not buy any.

By the time I left the castle, it was night. I convinced Kai I did not need a carriage as I needed to look for any hints of how she escaped.

That’s why I am now walking away from the castle, towards the Bowl Arena in the dead of night. I am worried about Paedyn because I know she can take care of herself, but I pray she was not caught.

As soon as I am far enough away from the castle, I quickly put my disguise on.

When I enter the Slums, I try remembering the directions Pae told me to get to the fort she lived in before.

Because it is so dark, it is hard to find my way around. There are also more people around than I would have thought. There are also more imperials around than I thought there would be.

That is going to make things slightly more difficult. But I assume that means they haven’t found Paedyn.

I am sure that my brother sent them out against my wishes. He has the authority to do that considering he is the king, but I thought he would trust me more when I said I did not need the extra help.

That is kind of ironic though, because I cannot be trusted, but he would not have sent me to do this if he did not trust me.

But all of this only showed me how desperate he was to get her back. Whether it was because he genuinely cared for her or was planning something with her, I did not know.

While I do have a disguise on, I avoid the imperials as best I can without looking suspicious. I doubt they would recognise me, but on the off chance they did, I would need to come up with a good excuse on why I was in disguise and then it would take me even longer to get to Pae.

The Slums are full of multiple alleyways, so it is making it hard to find the right one, but once I am sure I have found it, I look around to see if anyone is watching me. When I see no one there, I slip into the alley. 

I feel a strong hum of power from my own ability which makes me think I am in the wrong spot because Pae assured me no one ever came to her home.

Worry takes over as I rush over. I am sure I got to the right place, which means someone has found her.

Shit.

When I get there, I see Pae in a defensive stance and the back of a guy.

He does not look like he is about to attack, but then he turns to me with wide eyes. The stranger’s face quickly changes from confusion to anger.

I am wearing my disguise, and it had been working fine before, so what is this guy angry about?

Before I can dwell on the thought any longer, he lunges at me.