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Chapter Text

They had been waiting for Ted and Beard for a while, Roy and Nate were in their office. Isaac along with a couple other players were just sitting around waiting. Ted and Beard were never late so it was a weird feeling. Especially since Roy threatened to fine the players anytime they were late. The tv was on just to fill the empty space.

"We interrupt this program with breaking news," the anchor announced, causing Isaac to look up at the screen. Images of a car accident filled the screen. An overhead camera shot revealed a green Lamborghini flipped over on a busy street, several other cars parked around it but untouched. The distinct color and decals on the wrecked car were unmistakable. It wasn't a common car driven in their area.

"Isn't that Colin's car?" Isaac heard Sam ask.

The locker room fell silent as everyone stared at the TV. Colin was not there yet, and the car on the news looked undeniably like his. Panic began to spread among the team.

Isaac's phone rang, the sudden sound cutting through his panic. He glanced at the screen and saw Colin's mother's name. She never called him, but she had his number for emergencies, just like his parents had Colin's number. Colin's parents were all the way in Wales, it was over a five-hour drive and that was without traffic.

As he answered the call, guilt gnawed at him. Just minutes ago, they had been laughing about Colin's terrible driving, a running joke in the locker room. Colin had always taken it in stride, but now the thought of those jokes made Isaac's stomach turn.

"Mrs. Hughes?" Isaac answered.

"I-Isaac," she stammered. "The police just contacted me. They said Colin's been hurt. Please tell me he's with you, he's not answering."

"I'm sorry, he's not."

"Then it's true. They... they said it doesn't look good."

"Where is he?"

"At St. Thomas' Hospital. Isaac, please, I need you to be with him until we get there. I can't... I can't bear the thought of him being alone if—" Her voice broke. "You know he hates being alone."

"I'll go right now," he promised. "I'll be with him, I swear."

"Thank you," she whispered, her relief palpable even through the phone. "Please, don't let him be alone, I'll call them now, so they'll let you in with him."

Isaac hung up and looked around at his teammates, they were just as worried as him and they didn't know everything. "It's Colin," he said, his voice tight. "That is his car," he said pointing to the tv. "It's bad. I need to get to the hospital."

"We'll go too," Sam offered.

"No, it'll be a miracle if they let me in even with Mrs. Hughes calling them. Just stay here, I'll call if it's necessary." He didn't say for them to say their goodbyes, he didn't need to. The video of the car on the screen had been smashed so much it barely was recognizable.

He left immediately, he didn't have time to change out of his kit. He didn't want to waste a second, Colin might not have any. He ran to his car and started it as fast as he could before driving to the hospital. It was only a short drive, but it felt like an eternity.

When he got there, he ran inside and searched frantically for anyone who could help. Finally, he spotted a nurse behind a desk and ran over to her. "I'm looking for Colin Hughes," he said desperately. "His family called and said I should be allowed to see him."

"Are you a family member?" she asked.

"No, I'm his... his partner," he said hoping that would work. "Please, they said it was bad. Please let me see him."

She looked at him with a mix of pity and sadness before nodding. "They're getting him ready for surgery, but you should be able to see him for a little while before they take him into theatre."

Isaac nodded. "Thank you.”

She directed him to the room where Colin lay unconscious and hooked up to several machines. He could see where they tried to clean up the blood from him, but Colin was a mess. His face was cut up from what he suspected was glass. Colin had always been one of the smaller players on the team but now he looked not only small but so young. The only one smaller was Bumbercatch but Bumbercatch was rough and tumble where Colin was gentle but could be rough when he wanted. Before Jamie's turnaround, both Colin and Isaac had been cruel to Nate. Jamie had egged Isaac on, and Isaac had egged Colin on. He felt guilty for that because he knew Colin looked at older players to mimic and Isaac had known that.

Isaac moved slowly to Colin's side as if he was afraid any movement would hurt him more. "Hey," he whispered. "Colin, can you hear me?"

Colin did not respond, his eyes remained closed.

"I'm here," he told him. "I know you hate being alone, I'm here with you. Your mum's on her way. I think she's bringing your dad, probably because you can't tell her to leave him at home. I got a text when I got here from your mum, Dylan's on his way too."

Colin's older brother Dylan was the perfect son. Dylan had all these qualities that Colin wanted. But the funny thing was that Dylan had always thought he was some God on the football pitch, but he didn't even make his school team. All the while Colin made a premier football team, sure they were in the Championship now but not when he was recruited. And they were doing well enough to be able to be promoted if they continue to win. When they got relegated Isaac and Colin had gone out and got drunk. So, Isaac was there when Dylan called Colin to rub it in his face that they got relegated, the second time Colin had been in a team that got relegated.

Isaac took his hand, careful to avoid the IV taped to it. "You'll be ok," he whispered. "You just need to keep fighting, bruv."

He wasn't a real emotional person, but he couldn't lose his best friend. Colin had always been there for him, he knew all his secrets. He knew all of Colin's secrets too. Like Colin was horrible at flirting with women and never went home with any of the women he hit on.

A doctor came in and Isaac reluctantly stepped back to allow them to check Colin over. He watched in silence as the doctors spoke quietly to each other before leaving the room. Isaac returned to Colin's side, taking his hand again.

"They're going to take him in for surgery," the doctor explained. "His family should be here soon, but you can wait for them outside in the waiting area. We will come to get you when you can see him again."

Isaac nodded. "I'll be right outside," he promised Colin before leaving to go to the waiting area.

Colin's parents arrived about four hours later. He didn't realize how long surgeries lasted. Isaac stood up when they entered, Mrs. Hughes immediately embraced him. "Thank you for being here with him," she whispered.

"Of course," Isaac said. "I'm just glad he's not alone."

"Me too," Mrs. Hughes said.

Isaac had only met Colin's parents a couple times, once when Colin was new to the team. Isaac had already been on the team when Colin was recruited. Isaac had invited him out with the team. That night Colin had gotten sick, and Isaac drove him home. After that they became friends.

When they sat down Mrs. Hughes kept her arm wrapped around Isaac. "How long does surgery normally last?" Isaac asked.

"I have no idea. I'll go ask," she said, leaving the room.

"What happened?" Mr. Hughes asked. "We heard he was in an accident but nothing else."

Isaac swallowed. "I don't know anything more that it looked like he hit some roadwork equipment causing him to crash."

Mr. Hughes nodded. "Do you know how badly he's hurt?"

"Not really. He looks bad but that could just be superficial." Although he suspected it wasn't.

“It’s going to cost him his starting position,” Mr. Hughes muttered. Isaac kept his mouth shut, he knew Colin and his dad didn’t get along. Colin said his dad was mean or abusive, just uninterested in Colin’s life. The only thing he liked was that Colin was good at football.

"The nurse said you told them he was your partner," Colin's mother said.

"I was worried they wouldn't let me see him if I told them I was just his friend."

"I'm so glad he told you the truth, I knew it was weighing on him." Colin's father looked uncomfortable while his wife spoke.

"Truth?" Isaac asked.

"Yeah, you know him being gay."

Isaac felt like someone punched him in the stomach. Colin was gay? How could Colin not tell him? They were best friends, they were supposed to tell each other everything. If he had told Isaac, he would have been there for him. "He never told me," Isaac whispered. "He always seemed interested in girls, so I never suspected."

"I'm going to get some coffee in the cafeteria," Colin's dad said before leaving the waiting room.

Mrs. Hughes sighed. "Colin's been scared to tell anyone. His father didn't take it well, as you can see how he gets when we even mention it. Please don’t tell Colin I told you, he would be so angry and he barely calls home anymore as it is." She sighed again.

They sat in silence after that, waiting for Colin to come out of surgery. Isaac needed Colin to be ok. He needed Colin to wake up.

Colin's head was killing him, it felt like someone had drilled into it. He tried to open his eyes, but it was impossible. What had happened? The last thing he remembered was driving to training. Had he fallen asleep at the wheel? No, Isaac always teased him about his terrible driving. Everyone teased him about his driving. He knew he shouldn't get expensive sports cars that he couldn't control but what else was he going to spend his money on?

Someone was holding his hand. He tried to squeeze the hand, but it was difficult. "Colin?" Isaac's voice sounded rough.

Isaac was there? Why? Before he could think too much about it, he fell back asleep.

When he woke up again it felt easier to open his eyes. He looked around the room, it was dark. He turned his head slightly and saw Isaac asleep in a chair next to him. Colin tried to sit up, but it was too hard. "Isaac?" he croaked, surprised by how dry his throat was.

Isaac's eyes shot open, and he stared at Colin. "You're awake?"

"What happened?"

"You got into an accident," Isaac said. "Your car is totaled."

Colin tried to remember what happened. He had been driving to training, then... "I don't remember."

Isaac nodded. "The doctors said you might not remember. Police said you hit some construction equipment. You were in surgery for a while."

"Surgery?" he repeated.

"Yeah, you hit your head pretty badly, and broke your leg, they also said you broke some ribs and stuff. You're going to be off the field for months and that's if you heal quickly."

Colin groaned. "Fuck."

"You're lucky to be alive," Isaac scolded.

"Sorry."

Isaac sighed. "Don't apologize to me, you should apologize to yourself. What the fuck were you thinking driving that fucking car? You knew you couldn't handle it. It's our fault for thinking of it as a joke. You could have died, bruv."

"I'm sorry," Colin whispered.

"I know. Your mum and dad are here too, they went to get something to eat."

Colin nodded. "Are they mad?"

"I think they're more relieved than anything else," Isaac said.

"How long was I out?"

"About three days."

Colin looked at Isaac. "Have you been here the whole time?"

"Yeah, your mum's been here too. Your dad mostly stays in the hotel since he can't stand to be in hospitals."

Colin nodded. "It's not the hospital he can't stand to be around. You should go home."

"I'm not leaving you."

"You need sleep. My mum can stay with me."

"I'm fine, bruv."

Colin shook his head. "Go home. Get some rest, I'll be ok."

"I promise I'll be back tomorrow."

Colin smiled softly. "You better."

Isaac leaned forward like he thought about hugging Colin, even though they didn't have that kind of friendship. He knew Isaac wasn’t a hugger, his family weren't that demonstrative when he was growing up so hugging felt weird to him.

Isaac left the room and Colin tried to get comfortable, but it was hard to move without hurting. He closed his eyes and tried to get some more sleep.

The next time he woke up it was to his mother sitting next to him. "Hi," he whispered.

"Colin, thank God," she cried before kissing his forehead. "I was so scared."

"I'm ok," he promised. "Just sore."

"I'm so glad you're awake. We've all been so worried."

"Where's dad?"

"He's in the hotel room. He's never handled hospitals well, you know. Dylan was here yesterday but he had to go back to France."

He kept it to himself that he was glad his brother wasn't there any longer. Dylan had a tendency to make everything about him and his parents allowed it. Colin had to fight for every ounce of attention growing up and he hated it. Dylan got away with so much shit but Colin was the one who got in trouble.

They talked some more before he fell back asleep, it was so hard to stay up for longer than fifteen minutes at a time. He slept most of the day, but Isaac showed up like he promised. Throughout the next few days most everyone from the club had come to visit. Higgins brought flowers and a card. Ms. Welton brought some sweets and a new phone, his had been broken in the crash. Ted came and stayed until Colin's mother made him leave because of all the puns. Coach Beard came for a few minutes and left without saying anything while there. Roy came and yelled at him for driving recklessly when he couldn't handle his car. Groups of the team came at a time except Jamie, Sam and Dani who all came on their own separately.

The one person that never came was Nate. Colin expected it but it still hurt. He knew he had been mean to Nate before but he thought they had made up. Then Nate used the worst things Colin thought about himself against him. Being told that he was only good for covering a bloodstain had ripped apart his soul. That night he had went home with some man he hadn't even gotten his name. Most of the players on the team wanted to play the field and sleep with as many people as possible. Colin just wanted one man to call his own. But that was never going to happen. Coming out in football was a death sentence to his career. That was if he still had one after he healed.

Chapter Text

Colin stood in his driveway, waiting for Higgins. He didn't know how they picked who was driving him and when, but he wasn't going to fight it. He had already gotten an earful about his driving from his parents, Beard and Isaac. Anyway, this wouldn't be forever, they would get tired of driving him and he would be able to drive himself again with no problem.

It had been two months since his accident, two long months filled with pain, recovery, and endless therapy sessions. Today marked the beginning of a new chapter: his return to the football club for athletic physical therapy. Something that Roy had told him was worse than death, he wasn't looking forward to it. The club had been incredibly supportive, which he was grateful for because, as the numerous tabloids pointed out, the wreck had been his own fault. He was extremely lucky, the only one he hurt was himself and a concrete mixer. The mixer won.

Higgins rolled down the window and gave him a warm smile. “Morning, Colin.”

“Morning, Higgins,” Colin replied. He was glad it was Higgins that was picking him up, the only one better would be Isaac. He was nervous to face the whole club, not just a few here and there. It wasn't so much he was nervous about seeing them, but them seeing him.

Colin got into the car and Higgins turned around in his driveway. Higgins started chatting as soon as they left. Colin was thankful for it since he didn't know what to talk about.

"I think you could triple my house’s size and have it fit inside yours."

"Don't really have much else to spend my money on but cars and the house," he said truthfully.

"What about saving it? You won't always be a footballer."

"I know," Colin said although he didn't want to think about retirement yet. Watching Roy’s career end over an injury had been a blow to a lot of them.

"I sometimes wonder if you boys know how lucky you are."

"Huh?"

"When was the last time you had to worry about paying a bill?"

“I have auto pay.”

Colin watched as Higgins gripped his steering wheel a little harder than necessary.

“I didn’t mean it like that. I meant, when was the last time you didn’t have the money for something?”

"Ah, never. I signed on with Cardiff at eighteen. When we got relegated, I signed onto Burnley, then a year later Richmond and I've been here since."

It wasn’t an unusual thing for players to jump around. Actually, it was really fucking unusual that none of them left Richmond when they got relegated. Players usually jump ship if they can, no one wants to play on a team that got humiliated like that. But Ms. Welton paid them their regular premier pay, which probably took a big bite out of money the club couldn’t afford to lose.

“You do get that most men your age can’t afford a quarter of what you and your teammates do, right?”

“Of course. I’m not an idiot.”

Higgins snorted. “Sorry, right. Let’s change subjects. What do you like to do besides playing football?" Higgins was clearly trying to sound overly cheery.

"I don't know. Usually hang out with Isaac or some of the other guys. Sometimes I even go out on dates, but they are few and far between."

"Why is that? Haven't found the right man yet?"

Colin had been busy checking his phone that it took a few seconds for what Higgins had said to register to him. "Wait, what?" Colin asked looking up at Higgins.

"Oh, I was just asking if it's been hard to find the right man."

"Wh-why do you think I'm gay?" Colin asked, panic settling into his gut.

Higgins turned to him with a confused look on his face. "Was it supposed to be a secret?"

"I thought it was. How did you know?"

"I'm director of Football Operations. It's literally my job to know everything possible about you boys."

"You never said anything."

"It's not my place to talk about something that you don’t bring up to me personally. But truthfully, I didn't think it was a secret. Do you really think you're hiding it?"

Colin shrugged. "I thought I was. Who else knows?"

"I have no idea. I try to stay out of your personal lives."

"I do a good job of hiding it, especially while we're out." Higgins made that weird noise he does sometimes. "What?"

"I thought you were joking when you asked those women out. You were so...over the top. Between your bad pick-up lines and strangely forward topics I always assumed you meant it to be funny. Now that I think about it, it's kind of off putting." He had forgotten about the Christmas party two years ago. It had been before Ted was hired and Ms. Welton was going through a very messy and public divorce.

He drank way too much, and Isaac had been teasing him about not hooking up with anyone in a long time. It had been a running joke around the locker room. Hell, somehow even Nate knew about it to make the joke about him never being blown. People think they have to see everything, or it doesn’t happen.

Because of that he had hit on one woman and now he remembered Higgins and his wife were at the same table. How embarrassing. What no one knew was the woman actually did go home with him because he had been too drunk to drive, and they watched Strictly together and ordered a bunch of take out. He didn’t eat junk food, but it was fun and a very platonic night.

Colin didn't know how to explain why, but he wanted to try. "Women don't want to go home with someone like that." Most of the time, Robin had been different, he still got texts from her time to time.

Higgins was quiet for a moment. "And because if they turn you down in public, you don't have to explain to your mates why you didn't go home with a woman."

"Exactly. I tried that in the beginning but there's only so many times you can bring a woman home and play Go Fish before people start to talk."

Higgins laughed, when Colin didn't join him, he looked over at him. "You're serious, aren't you?"

"I like Go Fish. Anyway, only so long my cousin Jean could pretend to be my girlfriend before people look into my family and find out we share grandparents. We did that until I got signed onto Burnley."

"That is...oddly inventive."

Colin shrugged. "I'm really smart."

Higgins laughed but tried to cover it up with a cough. Why did everyone do that when he said something about being smart?

They pulled into the car park of the clubhouse. He parked and looked over at Colin. "Are you ready?"

Colin took a deep breath before nodding. "Ready as I'll ever be."

They got out of the car and headed inside together. Colin was going to be early for PT, but he didn't want to make Higgins late, so he opted to arrive with him. The halls of the clubhouse were empty, Colin felt like he was walking towards his execution rather than PT.

When they entered the locker room the first thing Colin noticed was Isaac changing into his workout kit. Isaac turned around and grinned at him. "Hey, bruv!" he exclaimed, pulling Colin into a hug.

"Hey," Colin said returning the hug. "How is everything?"

"Been alright. Glad you're back."

"Not technically back for another week and that's only if PT goes well."

"You'll kill it. Just remember, play through the pain." A saying that he had been told since he was little and started playing football. You get hurt, you get back up.

Colin hoped everything would work out, he didn't want to be off the pitch any longer than he had to. He put his bag down on the bench and started getting ready for PT.

"Hey, Colin," Isaac said suddenly.

"Yeah?"

"Did your mum tell you what we talked about?"

"No, was it something important?"

Isaac shook his head but scowled. "Nah, mate. I've got to go." That was weird, Isaac had seemed annoyed. Colin shrugged because now he was going to have to kill himself to get his right leg back into playing condition.

Once Colin entered the workout room, he noticed there were several new machines that he had never seen before.

"Oh, you must be Colin. I see you're early. I like that."

Colin turned to see who was talking and he felt his heart sputter in his chest. Standing in front of him was one of the most beautiful men he had ever seen.

"Fuck," he cursed, this was going to be worse than he thought.

Chapter Text

Colin stood at the curb, waiting for Jamie to pick him up for his second day back at the clubhouse. After the rollercoaster of a ride with Higgins yesterday, he didn't know what to expect. Jamie was unpredictable at best and, at worst, a whirlwind of chaos.

Suddenly, he heard the unmistakable roar of a sports car engine. A sleek black convertible pulled up in front of him, and Jamie, wearing sunglasses and a cheeky grin, waved at him. "Hey, mate!"

"Morning, boyo," Colin replied, preparing to open the car door. But before he could, Jamie hit the gas, pulling away slightly.

"Come on, gotta work those legs! Jump in!" Jamie called out, laughing.

"Are you serious?" Colin asked, feeling a mix of irritation and amusement.

Jamie revved the engine. "Deadly. Hop in, mate!"

Colin sighed but played along, jogging after the car. Jamie slowed just enough for Colin to catch up. When he finally caught up Jamie would hit the gas again. "You'll never catch up going that slow." Jamie stopped the car.

He knew once he got close to the car Jamie would take off again. So instead of running up to the car he walked and once he was in sprinting distance, he ran full out and jumped over the door and landed in the car. Only hurting his leg minimally when he hit it on the glove compartment.

"Are you crazy?" Colin asked, trying to catch his breath. Before that little bit of running would have been nothing but after two months of recouperation, he wasn't in shape...well in shape for a footballer.

"What? You made it." Jamie sped off and Colin decided to let the matter drop.

"Thanks for coming to get me. I really appreciate it."

"You scared everyone. When we saw the car, we thought you were dead. I thought Isaac was going to pass out."

"I didn't mean to worry anyone."

"Ever think about getting a Volkswagen?"

"No,” he said then realizing something. “This isn't your car."

"Well spotted. This is a rental. Some arsehole keyed mine while I was in the fucking shop."

"You do your own shopping?"

"Yeah, don't you?"

"I can't find new places to shop every time."

"What? Why would you have to find a new shop every time?" Jamie looked confused.

"I didn't want to join their loyalty club, I don't have that kind of time. I can't go to the meetings."

"Oh Colin. You make me feel so smart."

Colin didn't know what he meant by that, but it wasn't the first time someone had said that to him. He just learned to accept it as a compliment.

Colin sat in Jamie's car, staring out of the car as they crawled through the traffic jam. It had been over an hour since they left Colin's house, and they hadn't moved more than a few miles. Jamie drummed his fingers on the steering wheel, clearly impatient.

"Bloody hell, this traffic is a nightmare," Jamie muttered, glancing over at Colin. "Got anywhere you need to be in the next, oh, three hours?"

Colin chuckled. "Just work, same as you."

"Text Coach, let him know we may be late. You should text your PT too."

"Yeah, you're right." Colin grabbed his phone and sent a quick text to Coach Beard explaining the situation. Then he sent a similar text to his PT.

After he was done, he didn't know what to say. A quick text from Beard came telling him that if they were late, they'd still be fined. The fines weren't that much so it wasn't a big deal. "I just hope I'm able to get back on the pitch before the end of the season," Colin said.

Jamie glanced at him. "You will. Just work hard and listen to your PT."

Colin nodded. "Yeah, you're right."

Jamie smiled. "Of course, I am. I'm Jamie fucking Tartt. Everyone should listen to me."

Colin laughed. "Aren't you humble?"

Jamie shrugged. "It's worked for me so far. No point in changing it now."

"True," Colin said. They sat in silence for a few minutes before Colin spoke again.

"Dating anyone?" Jamie asked, shocking Colin.

"Huh?" They usually just made jokes but never really asked real questions.

"Just making conversation, mate."

"Umm...no. Like playing the field, don't I."

"You say that, but I've never seen you with anyone. You get shot down at parties all the time but you're a footballer, a starter even. Even the most shit players on a team can get laid."

"How many shitty players have you known?" Colin joked hoping Jamie would drop it.

"I'm serious, mate. Are you ace? Is that what this is? You're covering up that you just don't find anyone attractive."

Colin didn't know how to feel about that. He could say yes but sometimes people were just as bad to asexual people. They don't understand something, so they piss on it. Colin didn't understand it either, but he didn't look down on anyone for it. He knew what it was like to be different. He was gay, he had always known he was gay.

"No, I'm not ace. I like women, ok?" he lied. Higgins knowing was one thing but Jamie was another. He didn’t think Jamie would have a problem with it but you could never be sure.

"Then what's your problem? Not hard to pick up a bird when you play football. Most birds like footballers. You don't have to do anything other than smile at them."

"I just prefer to focus on football and not on dating."

Jamie sighed. "Fine. Whatever, mate. It just seems most of the time you want to make them lose interest in you."

If he only knew.

Thirty minutes later they were finally free of the traffic jam and on their way to the clubhouse.

After getting to the clubhouse, he hurried to dress for PT. He was already late and didn't want to be anymore late. He changed quickly and ran to the PT room where he found his therapist, Miles, waiting for him.

"Sorry I'm late. I hope it didn't mess up your schedule."

"No, I've been contracted fully with Richmond until you're able to be on the pitch again."

Colin was glad to hear that. “Thanks.”

"Alright then, let's get started. You need to do your stretches that we went over yesterday."

Colin groaned but got into position and began his stretches. Miles helped him with the ones he struggled with. After doing all the stretches that he needed to, he moved onto the next phase of his physical therapy. The Hamstring Curl Machine. Colin hated this machine, whoever invented it hated people. It hurt but strengthens the hamstrings.

Weights in any form weren’t his thing. It was why he needed a spotter every time he even looked at weights.

Miles was one of the most beautiful men he had ever met. Sadly, Colin's gaydar was always on point, it helped him keep stories about him out of the press and from getting punched in the face. And Miles was straight, not that he thought he had a chance with him anyway.

Once he finished with the weights he had to do some cardio. Cardio wasn't so bad, but he couldn't run for very long without his leg hurting. Since this was day two of a seven-day schedule he was worried. He didn't have to be 100 percent to get back on the pitch, but he couldn't be a liability.

He only got through fifteen minutes of cardio before Miles called a stop to it. "Ok, let's move onto massage therapy."

Colin froze. He wasn't expecting massage therapy, usually that was the last thing PT did. Miles gave him a questioning look. "Is there something wrong?"

Colin cleared his throat. "Uh, no. Nothing's wrong. Just surprised that's all."

"We decided it would help with your recovery since you seem to be struggling with some of the exercises."

Colin nodded. "Ok, then. Let's do it."

Miles led him over to the massage table and helped him get situated. Colin closed his eyes as Miles began to rub his leg, easing the tension that had built up. Colin started thinking about the least sexy thing he could think of...usually global warming did it but not this time. Dead flowers. Dirty gym socks. Rotten eggs. His year 9 maths teacher who called him a berk in front of his whole class. He stopped trying at school after that.

Miles finished the massage and Colin opened his eyes. He let out a breath he didn't realize he'd been holding.

"There, all done," Miles said. "You did good today, Colin. Keep working hard and you'll be back on the pitch in no time."

"Thanks," Colin said, sitting up. "See you tomorrow."

"See you tomorrow."

Colin got up from the table and left the room, heading to the locker room to shower and change. Once he got there, he found Isaac and Sam talking. He joined them, smiling. "Hey guys, what's up?"

"You are going out with us tonight. You've been putting us off for months," Isaac said.

"I know, I'm sorry. But I'm not really up to it. I'm tired from PT."

"You need to relax, bruv," Isaac said. "One night won't kill you."

Colin sighed. "Fine. One night."

"Yes! We're going to hit up this new dance club I've been hearing about," Isaac said, excited.

Sam nodded. "It's supposed to be amazing. Lots of beautiful women."

Isaac was watching him intently, he couldn't place the look.

Colin groaned. He hated clubs but only because he couldn’t ever be himself, but if he didn't go, they'd just drag him out anyway. Better to give in now and avoid the hassle.

"Alright, I'll go. Who I'm I to say no to beautiful women."

The next morning when Colin woke up, he knew he fucked up big time. Last night he had drank too much and flirted with the last man he should have ever flirted with. Now that same man was in his bed and Keeley was due to pick him up any minute. He’d been called dim his whole life but this is the first time he would agree with them.

“You’ve got to leave now,” he said, waking the man beside him up. “Keeley will be here any minute.”

Almost the whole team was at the club last night, excluding the three that were married.

“Just tell her I mixed up days and thought it was my day to take you to work.”

It was one thing sleeping with a one night stand, it was a different sleeping with a teammate.

Chapter Text

The car of his overnight guest just pulled away when Keeley pulled into his driveway. They hadn’t talked about what had happened the night before, he just got dressed and left. It wasn’t as awkward as he thought it would be when he woke up, but it wasn’t pleasant.

“You look like death,” she said as he got into her car. He hadn’t had time to shower, he would shower at the club.

“Thanks.”

“I had to pick up Dani from the bus station around three this morning.”

“What…why?”

“Jamie. I didn’t ask. Dani said it was something about hide and seek.”

“Oh,” Colin said, like it made sense. Jamie and Dani had a close relationship, both being the starting strikers. Colin knew that there were better players on the team than him. His position maybe isn’t as showy as theirs, but he still worked really hard. So, when Nate said all the things that were already bouncing around in his head, it made him feel like rubbish. Maybe it was pay back for how he treated Nate before. Maybe he deserved it.

“Hey, why the frown? Dani’s fine. He made friends there and they were very sad when I took him away.”

“It’s not that. Do you think bad things happen to people who do bad things?”

“Yeah, I believe in karma.”

“What does Richard’s ex have to do with this?”

Keeley took her eyes off the road and looked at him. “Karma is the belief that if you do good things, good things will happen to you but if you do bad things, bad things will happen. Get it?”

“Oh, yeah.”

“What is this about?”

“Well, you know, me and Isaac weren’t always nice to Nate. I never thought it was anything really bad but now I think it might have been.”

“You mean you were a bully.”

“I guess.”

“Are you still?”

“No, I swear.”

“I’m not just talking about Nate. Are you a bully to anyone else?”

Colin thought back and realized he had only been that way with Nate, no one else. It was like him, and Isaac fed off Jamie’s attitude. But it was on him, not Jamie, he didn’t have to go that way.

“No, but that doesn’t make it better. I need to apologize to Nate.” Maybe then Nate will be nice.

“That’s a start. You can’t change the past, but you can make sure you never hurt someone like that again.”

“Thanks Keeley.”

“Hey, where did you disappear to last night?”

Keeley had been there, but Roy hadn’t. Colin had forgotten she was even there after a few drinks. Isaac had been hitting on a woman who was falling over Sam, who didn’t seem interested.

“Umm…just went home.”

“How did you get home? Isaac was looking for you to take you back.”

“Uber,” he lied.

“Really? I could be wrong about whose car I saw this morning outside your house, but I could have sworn I saw-

“Yes really, I didn’t get a ride with any other player.”

“Funny, I didn’t say it was a player.” She raised an eyebrow at him.

“I have no idea what you’re talking about.”

She shrugged her shoulders. “It’s none of my business anyway. But next time tell Isaac you’re leaving because you know how protective of you, he is, especially after the accident.”

“Yeah.”

As they continued to drive, Keeley chatted animatedly about her night, while Colin nodded and pretended to listen. He was thinking about the previous night and what it meant.

It wasn't his first hook up. It was far from his first hook up. But it was the first time he felt...disappointed. Not because it wasn't good, it had been really good. But because he would have to see him every day. Colin had made it a point never to sleep with someone from his work life. It was a rule he had kept for a reason, if anyone found out his career could be damaged. He didn't think last night's partner would say anything, but he really didn't know.

When they got to the clubhouse, Keeley parked and turned to him. "Are you sure you’re, okay? You seem really distracted."

Colin nodded. "I'm fine. I'm just thinking about my PT. It's going to take a lot of work to get me back on the pitch."

Keeley nodded. "I'm sure you'll do great. You always do. And if you need to talk, I'm here for you."

"Thanks, Keeley. I appreciate it."

They got out of the car, and he headed for the locker room while Keeley split off and went into the office building entrance.

When he got into the locker room, he was greeted by the usual chaos. Roy and Beard were standing by the white board discussing the day's training, Isaac and Sam were arguing over the merits of various breakfast foods. He took a moment to soak it all in. He was happy to be back.

"You look like shit." Colin turned to see Roy looking at him, disapproval written all over his face.

"Good morning, Coach."

Roy narrowed his eyes. "What's wrong with you?"

Colin sighed. "Nothing, Coach. I'm fine."

"Like hell you are. Are you hungover? You're supposed to be getting back into shape to get back on the pitch."

"I'm not hungover. I had a rough night's sleep."

Roy huffed. "Whatever. Get changed and get to PT.”

Colin nodded and went to his locker.

After he was changed, he headed to the PT room.

"Hey, Miles."

"Hey, Colin. How are you feeling?"

"Good. Ready to get to work." Colin did his stretches while Miles got everything ready for the day.

"Okay, then. Let's get started." Colin followed Miles to the treadmill. "You'll be on the pitch for training today until you think you can’t go on any longer. We'll get you ready for it in about an hour. I don't want you straining yourself, but I need to see if you're progressing enough."

"Okay." Colin stepped onto the treadmill and began to slowly jog. He was determined to prove he was ready.

He managed to do ten minutes of jogging before Miles called a halt to it. "That was good, Colin. Keep this up and you'll be back on the pitch in no time."

Colin smiled. "Thanks."

"Okay, now for the next part. We're going to do some upper body workouts, then we'll move on to the treadmill again."

They did a variety of upper body exercises, some of which involved using a small, weighted ball. When they were finished, Miles took him back to the treadmill.

"Okay, I want you to run for fifteen minutes at a moderate pace. I'll be timing you. If you start to get tired, let me know. We can always stop early if we need to."

Colin nodded and started running. He was determined to make it to fifteen minutes.

After ten minutes, he was feeling tired but pushed on.

At the fifteen-minute mark, Miles stopped the treadmill. "That was great, Colin. You're really making progress."

"Thanks." Colin was breathing heavily but he felt good.

"Now, we're going to take a break. Go grab some water. Then we'll do some more light stretching.

"Okay." Colin headed to the locker room, eager to get some water.

An hour later he was on the pitch with his team, the first time in almost ten weeks. It felt amazing.

"Alright, eleven v eleven," Beard said.

Five minutes in and Colin was done, his leg was killing him, and he felt like he might pass out from the pain. But he couldn't tell anyone, or he wouldn't get off the injury list back onto the starting line.

"Bruv, are you alright?" Isaac asked, coming over to him.

"Yeah, just a little winded."

"Bullshit, you're not okay."

"I'm fine. I just need to catch my breath."

"Coach, Colin needs a break," Isaac called out.

"Fuck off, Isaac. I'm fine," Colin said, glaring at him.

"Nah, mate. You're not fine. You're fucking pale as fuck," Jamie said, looking concerned.

"He's always pale," Jamie said, coming up behind them.

"I'm fine."

"You're done for the day, Hughes. Go shower and get ready to go home," Roy said.

"I can keep going," Colin argued.

Roy glared at him. "Don't argue. Shower and go home."

"Fine." Colin turned and headed off the pitch, feeling frustrated.

"I'm driving you home," Isaac said, following him.

"No, you're not, the team needs its captain. Keeley won't be leaving for another few hours so I'm just going to call an Uber and go home."

"Are you sure?" Isaac asked, looking concerned.

"Yes, I'm sure. Now, go back out there and train. I'm fine."

"If you're sure..."

"I'm sure. Now, go."

Isaac nodded and headed back onto the pitch. Colin grabbed his stuff from the locker room and headed to the car park. He didn't know what he was going to do the rest of the day, but he needed to be alone.

"Do you need a ride home?" a voice said from behind him.

Colin closed his eyes and took a breath before turning around. This morning when nothing was said between them. When he was left this morning without as much as a goodbye, he thought it would be awkward seeing him today, but it hadn't been. Probably anyone else he would worry about them not being truthful, but he never had to worry about lies here.

"No, I'm fine. Isaac is driving me."

"Isaac is back on the pitch. He's not driving you. You look sick and you did really bad today."

"Why do you care? You left this morning without saying anything."

"No, you didn't speak to me. I did speak to you if you remember correctly."

He was right, of course he was right. "Sorry I freaked out a little."

"So do you need a ride?"

"No, you should get back on the pitch. I'm fine."

"Alright."

"Thanks for checking on me. Bye, Jan. "

Chapter Text

“Holy shit.”

Isaac looked up at O’Brien who was looking at his phone.

“What?” Isaac asked.

“Someone’s hacked a bunch of famous people’s phones. Lots of private videos and pictures have been leaked.”

“Fuck,” Isaac said.

“Looks like Keeley was one of them,” Zoreaux said.

Isaac was about to tell everyone to delete all their videos. If Keeley could be targeted any of them could be.

“She wasn’t the only one of us either,” Sam said, looking at his phone.

“Who else?” he asked.

“Colin.”

Isaac grabbed his phone out of his locker and went looking to see what was being said. It didn’t take long to find an article dedicated to just Colin’s videos. The tag line read “Welsh footballer’s double life exposed.” Five videos of him had been leaked.

“Colin’s gay?” Bumbercatch asked, he too had his phone in his hand.

Isaac walked away from the group and tried to call Colin, but it went straight to voicemail. He then texted him but didn’t have hope that Colin would answer. Colin had the day off because his PT thought he had overdone it the day before and wanted him to rest his leg. Isaac had talked to him last night after he spoke to his PT.

“What are you doing? Are you watching it?” Sam asked, sounding horrified.

Isaac looked up and saw Zoreaux looking at his phone. He was going to rip it out of his hand but stopped when the other man spoke up.

“No, it’s just a screenshot but…”

“But what?” Sam asked.

Isaac, against his better judgement went over and looked over Zoreaux’s shoulder to see what he was looking at. It was a screenshot of Colin on his knees, clearly blowing some guy, the penis had been blurred out but not Colin’s face. The video looked to be taken from whoever he was blowing. But that’s when he saw what Zoreaux saw. Isaac turned to look at Jan Maas and saw that he was gone.

In the screenshot next to Colin on a table were a set of keys. A set of keys with a very familiar keychain. They would recognize Jan Maas’s keys anywhere. He had one of those keychains with a cheap toy compass on them. He had told them months ago that his little brother had given it to him so he could always find his way home. Isaac hadn’t thought Jan Maas would keep something so sentimental but then they found out his little brother is only seven so that made more sense why he would go along with it.

Colin was icing his leg, he knew last night once he finally was able to relax that he was hurting more than he should be. He sent a text to Miles, once he realized that he wouldn’t be able to train without risking a setback. Then he texted Isaac to tell him he wouldn't be in tomorrow. Since Isaac was his ride tomorrow, he was the only one besides Miles he needed to let know.

After that he turned his phone off and went to sleep. It surprised him that he was able to go to sleep with only paracetamol to lessen the pain. Many a player had been lost to addiction after an injury.

When he woke up that morning, he decided to leave his phone off and stay away from social media. He just wanted to relax. So, he just put on a telenovela that Dani had gotten him into when they would hang out when he was recuperating.

Colin was lounging on his couch, leg propped up on a stack of pillows with an ice pack balanced on his leg. The telenovela on the TV provided a comforting background noise, allowing him to drift in and out. Dani had been right; these shows were oddly addictive.

By noon, the ice pack had long since melted, and Colin’s stomach rumbled in protest. He reluctantly pushed himself up and hobbled to the kitchen, fixing a quick sandwich. As he ate, he glanced at his phone, debating whether to turn it on or not.

With a sigh, he picked it up and held the power button. The screen lit up, and notifications began flooding in. His phone vibrated continuously as messages, missed calls, and app alerts appeared one after another. His heart sank as he saw the sheer volume of them.

The first message he saw was from Isaac: “Call me ASAP.”

Next was from Keeley: “You're not in this alone.”

Then Sam: “We’re all here for you. Don’t worry about anything.”

Colin’s heart pounded in his chest as he scrolled through the notifications. The words "video" and "leak" appeared repeatedly. His stomach churned with dread as he opened a news app. The leak was the top story but there was a smaller article that read, “Welsh Footballer’s Double Life Exposed: Private Videos Leaked.”

“No, no, no…” he whispered, his hands shaking.

He clicked on the article and was met with a screenshot from one of his videos. A video that was only recorded two nights ago in fact. It was a picture of him on his knees next to his couch. Jan Maas was sitting on the couch and holding Colin's phone. It had all been fun and hot at the time, now his gut twisted at the thought of everyone seeing it and that was only one video.

The other four were with different men but his face was always recognizable. Only one of the men's faces was visible. That was in video number three. A casual hookup from two years ago. Fuck, that guy was married with kids now.

His eyes went back to the screenshot of the video with Jan Maas. At least Jan didn't talk, and his face wasn't shown. Of course, his dick was there for everyone to see. He was going to be so mad at Colin. Then something caught Colin's eye, next to him on the table were Jan Maas’s keys. Maybe no one else noticed what Jan's keys looked like.

His vision blurred as he scrolled through the article. He hadn't cried since he was fourteen. But that was a long time ago and things were better left in the past.

But everyone would see this. His parents. His brother. The guys on the team. His friends. His bosses. Hell, even his PT would see. This couldn't be happening.

Colin’s phone buzzed in his hand, and he saw it was Isaac calling. He ignored the call and turned the phone back off.

He didn't even have to look at his mother's texts or listen to her voicemails. She had been supportive of him always, but she was a devout Catholic and having all the women in her church whisper behind her back was going to kill her and she in turn would kill him.

Why would anyone hack his phone? He wasn't even in a premier league right now. Right now he was on the injured list of a Championship league club, not like he was a hot commodity, he wasn't that even when he wasn't hurt.

But the wreck had made pretty big news and a lot of people had thought he was drinking and driving. Maybe they were trying to find proof of that? He didn't know and didn't care now. All he cared about now was figuring out a way to turn back time.

But he couldn't. He had to deal with this, whatever this was. He took a deep breath, trying to calm himself. His leg was throbbing, but he couldn't focus on that.

He had to figure out what to do. He knew he should call Keeley, she'd know what to do. It looked like a video of her had been leaked too. But she had Roy, Colin didn't have anyone to lean on. He was terrified to find out what the other men on the team thought about him now. He hadn't even come out to them. He thought they probably would be okay…maybe…hopefully, but there was a difference in knowing your mate is gay and seeing it in action.

"Fuck!" he shouted, throwing his phone across the room. It smashed against the wall. Well, he wouldn't have to worry about anyone calling now.

He grabbed the ice pack and went to the freezer. He tossed it in and shut the door.

He had to do something. He couldn't just sit there and wallow, no matter how tempting it was.

He looked around the living room and saw his laptop. He went over and opened it. He had to do some damage control.

He opened the web browser and went to the first news site that came up. This headline was about Keeley. Further down was another one about him. He clicked on it and felt sick. "Ex gives the scoop about Outed footballer." Eric Davis, his high school boyfriend. Eric had always been upset because Colin broke up with him when he joined Cardiff. It hadn't been because of joining, it had been because Eric had gotten too controlling and got jealous anytime Colin mentioned another man's name.

He checked his email and saw so many emails from family, friends and teammates. The only one he clicked on was from Miles, his PT.

    Colin,

           I expect you to be here bright and early tomorrow, if you don't do it now, you'll set yourself further back. Sam is picking you up.

Miles Danvers                                                  

    PT Guru        

He guessed that made his decision up for him. He would go to work tomorrow and face the music. He hadn't done anything wrong. He just needed to tell himself that. Just like his other mantra about being a strong and capable man.

Chapter Text

They showed up just after he broke his phone. After the wreck, the paparazzi didn’t even come to his house. Now they were surrounding his place. He pulled the shades on the bottom floor. When he bought the house, he liked having so much natural light. Now he hated it. He could see them on his security cameras, but it still made him uncomfortable just knowing they were out there.

He heard honking and then yelling from outside, looking back at his security video feed, he saw Isaac’s car pull up.

“Oh no, boyo,” he said to himself.

Isaac was a confrontational person, he had the kindest heart, but it was hidden under a tough exterior.

His best friend was now pushing his way through a gaggle of reporters and cameras to get to his front door. Colin was already at the door, opening it just in time for Isaac to come in, then he shut it and locked it.

“What the fuck, bruv? I’ve been calling you for hours.” Isaac shrugged off his jacket and tossed it on the floor.

“Hey,” Colin said, picking it up and putting it on the hook by the door.

“You’re lucky I don’t break stuff. Do you have any idea how worried everyone is?”

Colin didn’t really want to talk about any of it. Not only had he been publicly outed against his will, there were five very personal sex videos of him bouncing around the internet.

“Sorry, boyo.”

“Don’t be sorry.” Colin finally looked up at Isaac.

“So?”

“So what? Do you really think I care? In fact, this makes me feel better because with your game I thought you were going to die sad and alone.”

“I actually do really well.”

“I know, I’ve heard about the videos.”

Just like that, the elephant was back in the room with them. A huge elephant wearing a Richmond jersey.

“I didn’t watch them, bruv. None of us did. I just want you to know. We’ve all deleted our videos and pictures, if you and Keeley were a target any of us could be.”

“Want a beer?”

“Go on then,” Isaac said.

They went into the kitchen and Colin got them both a drink. Isaac sat at the bar and Colin leaned on the kitchen island.

Isaac took a pull of his drink and put it down with a thump. “We going to talk about it?” Isaac asked.

“What do you want to know?”

“Why didn’t you tell me? We’ve been mates for years.”

“I wanted to, but it was just easier. I was almost sure that you would be fine with it, but I was terrified by the slight chance you wouldn’t be. What about everyone else?”

“Are you kidding? Dani can’t wait to set you up with the men he turns down. He says it hurts his heart.”

“Yeah, I’m not going to sleep with Dani’s rejects.”

Isaac smiled. “Bumbercatch wants to go to a gay club with you.”

“Why?”

“I don’t know. Something about seeing if he could get free drinks at a gay bar.”

Colin rolled his eyes. “He would.” Colin hadn’t been to many gay clubs, he was too scared he would get recognized.

“You probably also shouldn’t be alone with Zoreaux.”

“Why?”

“He seemed way too curious about somethings.”

Colin laughed. That would be Zoreaux, he was a very funny man.

“Anyone with a problem with it?” he asked, fearing the answer.

Isaac looked down at his hands but then back. “Jan Maas is MIA right now. We haven’t been able to reach him. Anything you want to say about that?”

Colin felt trapped. He had been outed but he wouldn’t do the same to Jan Maas. He shook his head. “No clue.”

Isaac nodded like he expected that answer. “I told Sam I would bring you in the morning. I’m going to crash here for the night.”

“Do you think that’s smart? The press out there will think something is going on between us.”

“There is, you’re my best mate, I’m not leaving you to those vultures. Sam’s too nice to run them over.” Colin laughed but Isaac didn’t. Overprotective, that was Isaac.

“You know where the guest room is.” He had a few but one his mother used when she visited so it was to her taste. The other his ex had used when they were fighting, and he hadn’t yet thrown everything out.

Thankfully, he wasn’t a big enough name for the paparazzi to stay longer than a few hours. They were gone by ten that night. Colin and Isaac were playing FIFA when someone rang his doorbell. Since his phone was beyond repair, he would either have to turn on his laptop to check the security camera or go the old fashion way and just go to the door. He went to his door, pulling the shade to the side to look out. It was Jan Maas.

“I’m going to bed, bruv,” Isaac said from behind him. He probably saw him too.

“Yeah, okay, boyo.”

After Isaac disappeared upstairs, Colin opened the door.

“Hi, everything alright?” he asked.

“Why wouldn’t it be?”

“Isaac said you disappeared during training.”

“I had things to do. I let Coach Beard know.”

“Oh, I didn’t know that.”

“Why would you? You weren’t there today.”

There was the bluntness that he liked and hated at the same time. He knew Jan was working on not hurting anyone’s feelings but not that hard.

“Are you mad at me?” Colin decided just to ask him.

“Why would I be mad? You’ve done nothing bad to me.”

“You’ve been exposed to the public because of me. At least a part of you has been.”

“Did you sell the video?”

“No.”

“Did you give away your passwords or give your phone to others?”

“No.”

“Then why would it be your fault?”

“I don’t know. Just seemed right to apologize.”

“It wasn’t.”

“So why are you here?”

“I was checking on you.”

“Really?” That was nice of him.

Jan Maas stepped forward, almost pressing into his space. This is the closest they had ever been while sober or not working out together.

Jan was so tall, but his presence wasn't that overbearing. Not until this moment when Colin felt his presence almost all around him.

"Isaac's upstairs," Colin said.

"I saw his car. I just came to make sure you're alright."

"I'm fine, and I promise not to tell anyone about you."

"I don't care if anyone finds out.”

"So, you're...?" Colin asked hoping that Jan would understand.

"Tall."

"No, you're...?"

"Dutch?"

"No, your sexuality."

"Oh, it's Dutch." Jan smiled and left soon after. Colin had to laugh because no matter what, Jan was still Jan and that was comforting.

The next morning Isaac drove him to work, and Colin sequestered himself away in the workout room with Miles. Isaac had promised to keep everyone at bay today and he had kept his word. Colin went through all day without seeing anyone but Isaac and Miles. Miles gave him a ride home and everything seemed to be calm, he knew that was just the calm before the storm. The only plus about the day was he got a new phone.

Once Miles dropped him off, he knew he couldn't put off calling his mother any longer. It wasn't that he was gay, she had known that since he was twelve, but she said even before that. Something about him wanting to marry Ryan Giggs. His father had gotten him into football to toughen him up, but it just gave him very interesting fantasies in his teenage years.

She was a good mother, but she cared way too much about what people thought, especially people at church.

"Colin," she said sternly as she answered.

"Hey mum, how are you?" he asked, wincing at how nervous he sounded.

"You know how I am. Don't give me that crap."

Colin sighed. "Sorry."

"It's fine, Colin, just stop asking dumb questions. What I want to know is how are you? Have you eaten today? Do you need money?"

No matter how much money he made, she always thought he was one second from total bankruptcy and destitution.

"No, mum, I'm fine and yes, I've been eating. How's dad?"

She sniffed. "Turned out all his mates already knew, they just decided to not say anything until he did." Figures, he did lose his virginity to his father’s best mate’s son, Trevor, who was almost four years older than him. Trevor was now an oil rig worker in the North Sea.

"What about you?" He hated not knowing how she was going to feel about it all.

"It was fine. Could have been worse. But tell me about you. The videos, we of course haven't watched." Eww, he hoped not. "But others have, and some said you're very bendy, I guess that works for being gay and a footballer." Shoot him now.

"Mum!" he said. "Not okay."

"Well, how are you?"

"Fine, mum. I'm not dead and I didn't die. It sucks but it is what it is. I just hate that it was without my permission. No one deserves that."

"Are you in a relationship now? Any prospects? Dating any of them from the videos? Sharon from work said that there was five different men. I hope you were safe." Gross, he so didn’t want to think about Sharon, a woman near seventy watching him have sex.

"No, mum, I'm not dating anyone. And yes, I'm always safe," he said truthfully. With as many one-night stands as he had, he never wanted to put himself or anyone else at risk. He thought about getting on PrEP but it would risk outing him during drug testing.

"That's good."

"I better go. I need to shower and sleep."

"Alright. I love you. Please don't let this ruin you."

"I won't, mum. Tell dad I love him."

"I will. At least Isaac knew and it wasn't a surprise to him."

"Wait. What?"

"Fuck," his mother cursed. "I thought he would have told you. I told Isaac about you after the accident, I didn't mean to it just came out."

"I've got to go." He hung up before she said anything more.

Isaac had known since his accident. Isaac had been lying to him for months. He didn't know how to feel about that. He had not been truthful to Isaac for much longer. Maybe it was something he should just let go. That's what he would do, Isaac was his best mate, and he probably didn't say anything to him because Colin hadn’t.

Chapter Text

Colin had forgotten to set his alarm on his new phone, meaning he overslept. He was half awake when he heard someone banging on the door. He didn’t have to check to see who it was, he could hear Bumbercatch yelling in German.

“I’m coming,” he yelled out the window.

He quickly dressed and grabbed his gym bag. It was times like this when he wished he drank caffeine. He had a pretty nice coffee maker that had been given to him by Keeley. He did drink decaf very rarely, but Isaac told him before never to tell anyone. The jokes would never end.

“I heard you the first twenty times you banged on my door…my glass door,” he said, closing and locking up his house, he had already set the alarm.

“Who has a glass door? You’re just asking for thieves.”

Colin shook his head, his mother had the same complaint. He liked his house and that’s all that mattered. It was tempered glass anyway, he didn’t exactly know what that meant but the estate agent was really excited telling him about it. Isaac had been there with him during his walk through. They had just met, and Isaac seemed to think that he needed to watch over Colin.

“We’re late.”

“Sorry, boyo.” Colin threw his bag into the back seat of Bumbercatch’s jeep.

Bumbercatch had the radio up loud, but he wasn’t listening to music. It was something that went over Colin’s head. Talk radio made no sense to him if it wasn’t about football.

It wasn’t until about ten minutes went by that Colin realized they weren’t on the way to the clubhouse.

“This isn’t the way to Richmond.”

“We’re not going there today. We’ve got other plans.”

“What other plans?”

“We’re going to find out who hacked the accounts and leaked the videos.”

“It’s probably someone that isn’t even in the country. Just drop it.”

“No. My source says he knows who did it.”

“You have a source?”

“You don’t?” Colin shook his head and Bumbercatch looked at him.

“Anyway, I wouldn’t let him tell me over the phone. I check my phone daily for bugs but who knows if one snuck by.”

“You have bugs in your phone?”

“Not real bugs, bugs that lets them listen into our conversations.”

“Them who?”

“Exactly,” Bumbercatch said.

“I really need to get to work out, Moe.”

“Sorry,” Bumbercatch said with a shrug.

“This is kidnapping.”

“It can’t be kidnapping, you’re not a kid. It’s more like Welshman-napping.”

Colin considered jumping out of the jeep, but he would probably rebreak his leg. It wasn’t like Moe was going to hurt him, more like get him into trouble.

Ten minutes later they pulled up to a café that looked really rundown.

“We’re going to get murdered in here,” Colin said.

“This is my parent’s café.”

Oops. “I mean…it’s so nice.”

“I’m lying. We can’t rightly walk into a Starbucks to question my source.”

“You keep saying that. Like you need a source for a lot of things.”

“I have many sources. You should get you at least three, just in case two of them team up against you.”

Everyone knew about Bumbercatch and his conspiracy theories, but he never thought it would lead to his death.

“Maybe we shouldn’t go in there.” He watched as a cat chased a huge rat from the bins beside the building.

“You’ll never get answers if you’re always worrying about being horribly murdered.” Bumbercatch parked his jeep. “Come on, we have a leak to find.”

He wasn’t worried about being horribly murdered but more just regular murdered. He got out of the jeep and followed Bumbercatch hesitantly.

Inside was exactly as he expected. It looked like they had time traveled to the late 90s to a place that should have been condemned in the early 70s. The coffee maker looked like something out of the war, maybe even World War 2.

He was shocked when he saw Bumbercatch walk to a table in the corner and Colin recognized the man. Trent Crimm of the Independent. What was he doing there? Was he Bumbercatch's source?

Colin followed Bumbercatch around the rundown café, trying to shake off the unease gnawing at him. The place was dimly lit, and the faint smell of stale coffee lingered in the air. A few scattered patrons sat at worn-out tables, nursing their drinks. Trent Crimm sat with a notebook in hand, scribbling notes.

Colin glanced at Bumbercatch, who nodded reassuringly. They sat down, and Trent closed his notebook, giving them his full attention.

"Bumbercatch said you might know who leaked the videos."

Trent leaned forward, lowering his voice. "Yes, I do. I've been working on a piece about cybersecurity and privacy breaches in sports following the breach. During my investigation, I overheard something troubling. A writer from The Sun mentioned paying someone to hack the phones and clouds. Not only pictures and videos but voicemails. So, if you have private voicemails, you kept and they already targeted you, you should assume they have those too."

Colin's stomach churned. He only ever saved one voicemail. It was from an ex that was literally the one that got away, he thought he was going to spend the rest of his life with him. But they had been so young, only twenty-one at the time. Geoff got tired of waiting for him to come out, when he saw that wasn't ever going to happen, he dipped. "Do you have a name?"

Trent nodded. "I do. The person coordinating this is Martin Wallace. He's always been a rat with underhanded tactics to get exclusive stories. He's ruthless and has no qualms about invading people's privacy for a headline."

Bumbercatch leaned back, crossing his arms. "Why? What point did he have for this?"

"Money. Sex sells," Trent said.

Colin's mind raced. "So, Martin Wallace paid someone to hack my phone and leak those videos? Not only mine but over so many more."

"Yes," Trent confirmed. "I've always known him to not have principles, but this was pushing it even for him."

Colin's anger flared. "Is there any way to stop him? Can we prove it was him? I don’t understand why I was targeted." It really didn’t make any sense, there had to be a reason.

Trent sighed. "Unfortunately, proving it legally is a different matter. Wallace covers his tracks well. But we can expose him, make it known what he's done. Sometimes public outrage can be a powerful weapon. I would be risking my job and my career though. The Independent is owned by the same man that owns The Sun. But I'm willing to do it, as Theodore Roosevelt once said, 'In any moment of decision, the best thing you can do is the right thing, the next best thing is the wrong thing, and the worst thing you can do is nothing."

Colin nodded like he knew who that was. "Will my name be brought up?"

Trent gave him a sympathetic look and shook his head. "No, I was already working on the article when Moe here called me. It will take time, and I'll need concrete evidence. If I write a story and post it without all the facts, I'm doing a disservice to my readers and also making me liable. I'll also have to do some trickery to get it past my editor."

Bumbercatch leaned forward. "We should follow the money. Find out who he paid to hack the information."

After they left the cafe, Colin thought they were finally going to the clubhouse, but he was wrong.

"Where are you taking me now?"

"Well, that's only half of the story. Trent will do what he can, but we'll need a backup. I've called an associate that can help."

"An associate? Who?" That didn’t sound good or legal.

Bumbercatch didn't respond, instead turning into a rundown area with several warehouses.

"This doesn't seem sketchy at all," Colin said sarcastically. Bumbercatch really worried him with all the cloak and dagger stuff.

The associate turned out to be a woman who had also been hacked, she was a pretty popular reality star. Videos of her and her ex-husband were everywhere now. Everything was going fine until the police raided the warehouse which apparently doubled as a drug lab. The woman’s ex-husband’s drug lab that she was planning on setting fire to when they were there.

That was how both Colin and Bumbercatch found themselves in handcuffs and detained. To top off the whole horrible day there were two photographers that he knew to be from a tabloid.

"All I wanted was a ride to the clubhouse," he said looking over at Bumbercatch.

"YOU'LL NEVER MAKE ME TALK!" Bumbercatch yelled at the officer who looked bored.

Colin laid his head back and wondered when what he did to deserve this.

A piece of advice he would give to anyone, if you're going to get detained, don't get detained with someone who believes that the government is reading our thoughts with their specialized machines.

Thankfully, they were released after a few hours because they didn't have any reason to hold them. They weren't looking for drugs and didn't make them. Colin didn't ever take more than over the counter pain killers and Bumbercatch didn't take anything, he was sure that was how the government entrapped your brain waves.

When he got home, he saw that their faces were splashed across a few online tabloids...perfect.

Chapter Text

It was supposed to be O’Brien to get him this morning but instead he was greeted by the sight of Ms. Welton’s Rolls-Royce in his driveway, along with its driver at his front door. This wasn’t good. Was he going to be fired? Put on the reserves?

He carried his gym bag awkwardly to the car. It wasn’t his style of car, but you have to pay homage to a Rolls.

The driver opened the door for him and hesitantly got in. Ms. Welton was sitting regally on the other side.

“Ms. Welton,” he said awkwardly.

“We need to have a chat Colin and I decided this morning was the best time.”

He was going to die of heart failure. In public with the rest of the team, she wasn’t so intimidating. But alone with her in her car, he felt like a naughty schoolboy about to get a paddling and that just wasn’t his kink…at least from a woman.

“If this is about last night.”

“This is about the last few months.” The driver got into the car and started to drive. Colin kept his gym bag on his lap, fiddling with the zipper. “Your wreck was bad PR for the club, you know that right?”

He nodded. “Yes, Ma’am.”

“The leak wasn’t your fault, and your personal life is no one else’s business but last night, that was very much our business.”

“We weren’t arrested, just detained.”

“Having two of my starters on the front of every tabloid this morning in handcuffs outside warehouse full of drugs is not good. I have to have a press conference this afternoon because of it.”

“I’m really sorry. Can I ask something?”

“Go ahead.”

“Usually something like this would be dealt with by the manager. So why isn’t Coach lecturing me?”

“Because he got the short string and has to deal with Bumbercatch.” Poor Ted. “And it’s my club and I’ll lecture anyone I want. This year you alone have put us in a negative light three times. One wasn’t your fault but two times it was. Do better.”

“Yes, ma’am,” he said.

The rest of the ride was so quiet he could hear his heartbeat. When the car came to a stop he tried to get out, but the door wouldn’t open.

“Safety lock, Colin,” she said.

“Oh.”

He had to wait until the driver let him out then he said a quick thank you to her, grabbed his bag and ran for the locker room.

“You owe five-hundred pounds, bruv. For missing PT yesterday. We know that Boss Lady picked you up, so you get a pass on last night,” Isaac said.

“I’ll pay it tomorrow,” he said, tossing his bag in front of his locker. He looked around and saw everyone looking at him. “What?”

“You got arrested,” Sam said.

“No, we got detained, big difference.” He looked around and noticed Bumbercatch wasn’t in the locker room. “Where’s Bumbercatch?”

“Doing laps before training, same as you would be doing if you weren’t still on PT time,” Roy said coming out of his office. “Because of you two idiots we had paparazzi surrounding the club this morning.”

“I didn’t know what we were doing. I was taken against my will.”

“That’s no excuse. If everyone did what Bumbercatch wanted we’d all be wearing tinfoil hats and having monthly body scans to check for microchips hidden in our bodies,” Roy said before going back into his office and slamming his door.

“Him and Keeley’s having problems, best not to rile him up, bruv,” Isaac said, patting him on the shoulder.

“So how much trouble did you get into with Boss Lady?” Dixon asked.

“Not as much as I probably should have. Listening to Bumbercatch was a mistake, one that I won’t be doing again.”

“It was quite stupid,” Jan Maas said.

“Thanks.” Since their night together there hadn’t been anything sexual between them. He was used to one-night stands but not seeing them daily.

Before he was ready to go to PT, Ted and Beard came out of their office.

“Colin, would you come in here, we’d like to talk to you for a minute.”

There were several “Ooohs,” from the other players. Colin walked into the office followed by Ted and Beard. It didn’t make him feel any better when they shut their door.

“I thought because Ms. Welton yelled at me, I was done.”

“No one is going to yell at you. But you have to see our point of view here,” Ted said.

"The pictures don't tell the true story," Colin said.

"They rarely do," Ted said. "We called you in here because you’re back on the pitch for our next game, which as you know is an away game with Cardiff."

Of great, his family’s home team, the one that he left after getting relegated. They had been none too happy when he didn't leave Richmond like he did Cardiff.

"Are you sure I'm up for it?"

"That's what we're going to find out. No better way to find out than doing it," Ted said with Beard nodding along.

"So, you didn't call me in here to yell at me about getting detained last night?"

"Things happen, best thing to do it put it behind you. You're having your last regularly scheduled PT appointment today, then you're back training. Miles will stay on until he's confident that you're not going to reinjure yourself. Then you’ll see the club’s PT bi-weekly."

"Thanks, Coach."

Ted nodded. "Now go on. Starting tomorrow we're going to work you back into playing condition."

Colin smiled. For the first time in months, he felt like himself. This he could do, this is what he got paid to do, not sit on his couch and watch Eastenders.

The last of his PT went without incident and he went to the locker room with the rest of the team. There was no real reason to hurry home after work when it was empty and lonely.

"Hey, we're going out tonight, you're going with us," Isaac said.

"No. I'm already in trouble with both of bosses," he said.

"Fine, but who's going to take you home?" Isaac asked.

"I can take him," Bumbercatch said.

"NO!" the whole team said.

"I'll take him," Jan Maas said.

The team started to exchange knowing looks but Colin didn't know what that was about. They couldn't know that it was Jan Maas in one of the videos with him. Like who pays attention to car keys on a table?

This time after they had sex, Jan Maas left right after. He guessed two-night-stands were a thing now. It was different from the last time, first neither had been drinking. And second, it felt…different. He couldn’t explain it, but it just didn’t feel like it had before. Not bad or good but just different.

Chapter Text

Colin had been waiting for Jan Maas when Mrs. Higgins pulled into his driveway in her family wagon. She had two of her sons in the car with her. He thought they may be two of the middle ones.

“Good morning, Colin,” she said as she rolled down her window.

“Good morning Mrs. Higgins. What are you doing here? I thought Jan was coming to pick me up?”

“He was but he called Coach Lasso and said that something came up and he wouldn’t be in today. Everyone else was already at the club and I wasn’t too far away so Leslie asked me to get you. I hope that’s alright, dear.”

“Yeah, that’s great. Thank you.”

“You’re welcome. Just throw your bag in the back, the boys can put it somewhere.”

Colin looked back at the two zombies on their phones.

“It’s alright, I don’t mind holding it.”

“If you’re sure.”

“Yeah, thanks.” He got into the front seat and sat down, putting his bag in between his legs and buckling up.

“Are you excited to get back on the pitch?” she asked as she pulled out onto the road.

The boys in the back were still attached to their phones so she must not get a lot of conversation in the car. His mother would have slapped his phone out of his hand if he tried that and gone after him with a wooden spoon.

“Oh yeah, and a little nervous. Ten weeks is a long time to not be playing. It will be hard to get back into the feel of everything.”

“You’ll do great. You’re going home for your next game right?”

“Yeah, we’ve played them before but not since my wreck. My mum says my whole family are going to be there.” Two grandfathers, one grandmother, a great-grandmother, five aunts, six uncles, their kids and his parents. Thankfully, his brother wouldn’t be caught dead at one of his games.

When he played at Cardiff, they came all the time. His nana had been his biggest fan, until they got relegated and then she got the last word when she died.

“That’s nice,” she said. “I was wondering if you have yourself a fella?”

“MUM!” one of the boys said from the backseat.

“What? Just go back to playing on your phones.” She looked at him for a moment before back at the road. “So?”

“Uh, no.”

“I know some people think being set up on a date is a little old fashion but-

“It’s really nice of you-

“Before you say no, just let me tell you a little about him. He’s tall, handsome with a really good job. And he’s really smart.” Colin usually didn’t get with really smart guys. They usually thought he was dumb, he didn’t think he was dumb so why would he be with someone who thought he was. He knew he wasn’t the smartest man alive but it wasn’t like he was eating paint chips and staring at the sun.

“You’re leaving something out Mum,” the older one in the back said. Colin looked at Mrs. Higgins, waiting.

“It’s not bad. He just has an adorable little boy.”

“Umm…” No. Colin wasn’t about to date a dad.

His mother wouldn’t let him have a dog when he was younger because of an incident when he ran out of fish food. He learned the hard way not to feed the fish bread. RIP Goldy and Yellowy. He was pretty sure his mum wouldn’t be able to find a new child at the child store and replace this man’s kid.

It took him longer than it should to realize they weren’t his old goldfish, especially since they were rainbow fish. That was a mistake he only made twice. It did make him feel a little strange in the beginning when Ted told them to be Goldfishes.

“He’s a really good man. He’s a widow, his husband passed away four years ago and he’s finally back dating. He hasn’t found anyone he really likes. If it doesn’t work out at least you’ll have a nice dinner.”

Blame it on his mum but he couldn't say no to the motherly intervention.

"Fine. One date," Colin agreed, even though he already knew how it would play out and it wasn't good.

"Good, I'll give him your number."

He guessed he would be changing his number after this date. Wouldn't be the first time he had to change his number. A thought occurred to him. This would be the first date he could go on without being on the downlow.

When they got to the club he said goodbye to Mrs. Higgins. "Thanks again for the ride, Mrs. Higgins."

"Of course. And I'll have Ryan call you."

"Great," he said, pretending to be interested.

Once training was over, Colin wanted to die. His leg was a bit achy, but it was mostly his exhaustion that was getting to him. He stayed under the spray of the shower for longer than he usually would.

"You're clean," Isaac said loudly. Then Colin was hit with his towel. It fell and got soaked from the water.

"What the fuck?" he said.

He had been worried in the beginning the others would be weird while showering. And he had been right but not for the same reasons as he thought. A few of the men seemed to be trying to pose when he walked by. It was very strange and made him want to wait until the showers were empty to shower.

When he got back into the locker room he heard his phone ringing. The call was from an unknown caller. Usually, he wouldn't answer if he didn't know who it was, but several people had his number now that didn't before.

"Hello?" he answered.

"Colin Hughes?"

"Yes."

"I'm Ryan Glynn, Julie Higgins gave me your number. I hope I'm not bothering you."

"Uh no, it's fine."

"Look, if you're not interested, you can tell me. I'll tell my aunt that we went out and didn't mesh."

"Your aunt?"

"Aunt Julie...Higgins."

"Oh." Great, he's the Higgins's nephew. There was no way he could turn him down now. Mrs. Higgins had brought over a lot of food during his first few weeks back home from the hospital when moving still hurt and his mother had to go back to work. "No, I'm looking forward to it. Whenever it is."

"How about this Saturday?"

"Can't, I'll be playing in Cardiff."

"When do you get back?"

"Sunday night probably."

"How about Monday night?"

"That sounds good."

They said their goodbyes and Colin saved the number in phone as Ryan or was it, Bryan. Damn, he already forgot.

Chapter Text

A few days later, Colin and his team were on their way to Cardiff. He was going to meet his family at a local restaurant and eat, then he would be locked down on curfew for the rest of the night.

“Excited to go home?” Isaac asked.

He knew what he meant. While Colin wasn’t from Cardiff exactly, it was his first club, his family’s club.

“Yeah. Little worried about the game but I’m a strong and capable man.”

“Yeah, you are, bruv. Oh, Chrissy wants to set you up with her brother.”

“No.”

Isaac had just started dating Chrissy about four months ago.

“Come on, she says he’s hot.”

“About her brother?”

Isaac shrugged.

“Mrs. Higgins already set me up. I’m only doing this once. I can find my own dates. You don’t even know the type of men I’m attracted to.”

“What do you mean?”

“What do you mean, what do I mean?”

“A bloke’s a bloke, right?”  

“Boyo,” Colin said shaking his head. “That’s dumb.”

“Probably,” Isaac agreed.

“Like, what attracts you to men?” Zoreaux asked, he was in the row of seats behind him and Isaac.

“What attracts you to women?” he countered. It wasn’t homophobia that had them questioning and making statements as much as it was ignorance. Well, maybe a little bit too much curiosity on Zoreaux’s side.

“What do you mean?” Dani asked.

Dani was across the aisle sitting by Jamie.

“Size of their cock, right?” Jamie asked, several others nodded. Figures that if Jamie were queer, he’d be a size queen.

“I’m not having this discussion,” he told them.

“We’ve told you about all our conquests, come on share. This time you don’t even have to lie,” Winchester said. Winchester and Dixon were in the row in front of Dani and Jamie.

Colin had noticed Jan was quiet but didn’t look uncomfortable. Even with as honest as the man was it was hard to read him.

“I’m not telling you about my sex life.”

“But we have questions,” Dixon said.

“My sex life isn’t there for your entertainment.”

“It’s not there for yours either,” Jamie said, there was laughing from the other players following.

“Funny. If you want to know more about gay sex, you have your phones.”

“I’m not going to watch some strange man have sex with another strange man,” Zoreaux said.

“Yeah, we know you, it’ll mean more,” Bumbercatch said.

“How did we go from talking about what kind of man I’m attracted to, to talking about watching me have sex.” He shuttered.

“What if we already have?” That was from the back of the bus. Everyone now was staring at O’Brien.

“No. That’s not right,” Sam said, shaking his head in disappointment.

“Well, I guess it’s only fair, I’ve watched O’Brien have sex way too many times,” Colin said, trying to make a joke of it. He didn’t want things to be awkward. Call it his need to please and make everyone else comfortable.

“What? When?” Isaac asked.

“When I accidently set my kitchen on fire. I stayed with O’Brien until they had my place fixed up.” It was then he knew why his mother didn’t allow him in the kitchen growing up. If he could set water on fire no telling what else he could set on fire.

“Why didn’t you stay at my place, bruv?” Isaac asked, looking offended.

“It was when you were dating that woman Paulette, remember? She didn’t like me.”

“Oh, yeah.”

Paulette had told Colin several times when Isaac wasn’t around that she thought their friendship was weird. It was actually pretty amazing he was able to keep his secret from Isaac as long as he had as much as they were together.

“Please, no one else watch those videos,” he asked, pleaded really.

“Of course, most of us knew that without being asked,” Winchester said, glaring at O’Brien.

“Let’s just talk about anything else, please.”

“Right. Who has the best looking co-

“STOP!” everyone yelled at Bumbercatch.

The bus atmosphere slowly returned to its normal one with laughing, banter and boredom. He guessed deep down he knew some of them probably at least watched a little of one of his videos. But having it confirmed was worse than he thought. It wasn’t like none of them had ever seen him naked, he's been showering in front of others since he started football. But being naked and having sex were two very different things.

When they arrived at the hotel, they got their room keys and split off from each other to relax some. They were lucky they weren’t being forced to share rooms, sometimes when clubs were trying to make up for lost revenue from being relegated, they tried to save money where they could.

Once he put his stuff away, his phone went off. It was his mother letting him know she had rented out a room at a local restaurant. She said he could bring anyone he wanted but after the bus ride he needed a break from his teammates.

He went looking for Ted to tell him that he was going out and would be back before curfew. He couldn’t find Ted, Beard or Roy so he had no choice but to tell Nate. It had been uncomfortable with Nate since he told Colin what he thought of him.

“Hey, Nate, I just wanted to let you know that I’m going out for a little bit but will be back before curfew.”

Nate looked at him with disgust. “If you’re not even going to try maybe you shouldn’t be a starter.”

“What?”

“You’re second team until you can learn how to take your job seriously.”

Colin was confused about what was going on. “I do take my job seriously. It’s just we’re here and my family wants me to join them for dinner.”

“It’s your choice, continue to be a starter or run to mummy.”

Nate turned around and walked to a door that Colin guessed was his hotel room.

“He can’t do that.”

Colin turned around and saw Will. He was embarrassed that Will had heard him get told off by Nate.

“I didn’t know you were there,” Colin said lamely.

“Only Coach Lasso can move you off your starting position. Go have dinner with your family.”

Will looked much younger than he was. He was actually older than Sam and the same age as Jamie.

“I don’t know.” What if Coach Lasso lets Nate move him to the second team? His whole family was coming to the game tomorrow.

“Hey, how about I go with you? Then when we’re asked later, I can back you up that you weren’t drinking or doing anything else forbidden before a game.”

“Really? You’d do that?”

“Of course, come on.”

Chapter Text

Colin was starting to regret bringing Will along to the family dinner, mainly because his cousin Penny had developed a huge crush on him. Penny, a forty-five-year-old mother of five, with three kids older than Will, was making things awkward. She was used to getting her way, and while Will was polite, he didn’t seem interested at all.

Colin's father was surprisingly nice, even without having a drink. Earlier, Colin's mother had pulled him aside to explain that his accident had deeply affected his dad. It wasn’t until they got home that his father realized how close Colin had been to dying. Now, his dad was talking to him comfortably, like he would anyone else. It was unfortunate that it took such a close call for this change to happen.

The downside of the evening was that his brother, Dylan, was there and would be at the game tomorrow. Dylan had moved back to Wales a few weeks ago, a detail Colin would have liked to know beforehand. Dylan wasn’t a horrible person, but he always tried to outdo Colin. As long as Colin didn’t excel, Dylan was nice. But as soon as Colin showed real talent in football, Dylan made it his mission to make Colin feel inferior. Colin hadn’t cared about being the smartest or the most athletic; he just wanted a better relationship with his brother like when they were little. But after years of put downs and passive aggression from his brother he just stopped caring.

His mother came over to him with a big smile, usually a sign of her doing something that she knew he wouldn’t like.

“I wanted to talk to you, I have something to ask.”

“What?” he asked suspiciously.

“Are you dating anyone?”

Oh no. “No, but I don’t want to be dating right now. I’m much too busy.” They were trying to get promoted, he couldn’t put any time and energy into a relationship.

“Just give me a minute. He’s handsome, cultured, successful and nice.”

“No.”

“He’s a wonderful man, he’s a friend of your brother.”

Now the answer was fuck no but if he said that to his mother, he’d get a slap to the face.

“Like I said, I’m not looking for a relationship.”

“Oh, but Mi-

“I said no,” he said and turned, leaving her to talk to an empty space.

“Colin, there’s a problem,” Will said, coming up behind him.

“Penny?” Colin asked.

“No, she lost interest when she found out I was the kitman.”

“Sorry,” Colin said, though he wasn’t sure why he was apologizing. Will just got lucky that Penny lost interest.

“Don’t be. No, I just got a text from Beard. We need to get back to the hotel.”

Colin pulled out his phone and saw that he had turned on ‘Do Not Disturb’ during dinner and forgot to take it off. He had missed seven calls from several people, four texts from Isaac, Sam, Beard, and Coach Lasso, and what looked like a very angry email from Nate.

“Do you know what’s going on?” he asked Will.

“No, the text from Beard just said that we needed to come back to the hotel now.”

The first thing Colin noticed upon arriving at the hotel was the four police cars parked outside. Inside, the lobby was in chaos. Several officers were talking to his teammates, who looked upset. Will broke off from him and disappeared into the crowd.

“There you are,” Coach Lasso said, coming to stand in front of Colin.

“What’s going on, gaffer?”

“Colin, we’ve had an incident here.”

“What kind of incident?” He hoped no one was hurt, he didn’t see anyone missing but he hadn’t looked that hard.

A phone was thrust into his line of view. It was Isaac’s. He looked at his friend, but Isaac just shook the phone at him. Colin took it and looked at the screen.

It was a video of his hotel room. He recognized his stuff thrown around, cut up, and destroyed. The room looked like a tornado had hit it. His clothes were shredded, the mattress was slashed, and his suitcase was emptied, its contents strewn across the floor. His laptop was smashed, its screen shattered. Then there were the walls. A very derogatory term for a gay man was painted on the walls, not just once, but several times in big, red letters. The paint was dripping, looking like blood. It was everywhere, creating a gruesome scene.

“How?”

“It looks like your keycard was used around an hour ago. We only know anything happened to your room because the door was propped open,” Coach Lasso said.

“How? I have my keycard with me.” He pulled out his wallet to grab his keycard but remembered he hadn’t put it in his wallet yet. The last time he remembered having it was after he left his room when it was in his hand. He must have dropped it at some point. “I lost it.” The card had been in its paper sleeve, saying what room it was for, so it wouldn’t be hard to find. But it didn’t have his name on it, so how did they know it was his?

“The police are going to talk to you. Do you want one of us with you?” Coach Lasso asked.

“Coach Beard.”

They looked confused, but Colin knew everyone else would act with emotion, not Coach Beard. And he was right. Coach Beard asked good questions about fingerprints and cameras. It turned out his room was in a strange spot—the only one not watched by cameras. It was also by the stairs, which had cameras that weren’t working. So, whoever did it was getting away with it.

“We’re getting you another room,” the manager of the hotel said. “We can’t apologize enough. This has never happened before, and we will take steps to make sure this never happens again.”

“He won’t need another room. He’s staying in my room,” Jan Maas said unexpectedly. It had taken their second time in bed for Colin to understand what was between them. It was a true friends-with-benefits situation. He didn’t have deep feelings for Jan Maas like he thought he might after the first night. His feelings could change, maybe, but he didn’t think they would. He had a lot of one-night stands and several relationships, but he had never had a friends-with-benefits situation.

“Maybe I should stay with someone else,” he told Jan Maas as they walked away from the group of people.

“It’s not for sex. Coach would kill us if we broke the rules like that. Someone is after you,” Jan Maas said bluntly. The rules the night before a game was much like a twelve-year-old had. In bed by ten, no sex and no drinking or anything else. Anything else they couldn’t do anyway because they were tested pretty rigorously.

“Yeah, okay. Thanks.”

They headed to Jan Maas’s room. He wasn’t sure how the night would go. His room had been a double bed and he hoped that Jan’s would be too. When Jan opened the door Colin was glad to see there were two beds.

“That one’s mine,” Jan said, pointing to the bed that had been stripped and new linens put on.

“Did you bring your own sheets?”

“Yes.”

“Okay.”

He kicked off his shoes and got into bed. He was glad that their kits were taken by Will into the locker room on the day they arrived. If he had his it would have been shredded like everything he owned. He had wanted to go see if anything could be salvaged but the police had told him that what wasn’t shredded had been urinated on.

Besides the paparazzi everyone else had been kind after he got outed. Sure, he had heard some remarks here and there, but no one was in his face about it. But this…this was something different. Who could hate him enough to do this?

Nate hated himself just a little bit more by keeping his mouth shut. He had noticed Colin dropping his keycard after they had their row earlier, well his row, Colin just took it.

Nate walked away from the card on the floor, Colin would just have to get a new one from the front desk. There had been a few other people in the hallway when that happened, any one of those people could have seen Colin drop the card. Know the room was Colin’s the only out player and do what they did. What if their plan had been darker than just vandalizing the room? They could have waited in the room for Colin to come back. He would have gotten a new card, they would have deactivated the old one, but it would be too late, the person would already been in the room. They could have hurt Colin, they could have done worse, and it would have been all his fault.

He would be a better person, he would atone for his mistakes. He just hoped one day he could be honest and tell the truth. That it had been his fault that someone had gotten into Colin’s room and ruined all his stuff.

Chapter Text

Colin stood in front of the mirror, adjusting his shirt for the third time. He was nervous, which wasn’t typical for him. Blind dates weren’t really his thing, mostly because it risked outing him. But that ship had long sailed now so when Mrs. Higgins had suggested it, he found it hard to refuse.

He took a deep breath and glanced at his reflection. "Alright, Colin, you can do this. You’re a strong and capable man," he muttered to himself. With one last adjustment to his collar, he grabbed his jacket and headed out the door. The restaurant Mrs. Higgins had chosen was a cozy little bistro, known for its warm ambiance and excellent food.

As Colin approached the entrance, he spotted a man fitting his date’s description standing near the door, checking his watch. He looked up and met Colin's gaze, offering a polite smile.

"Colin, right?" the man asked, extending his hand. "I'm Ryan. My aunt Julie told me a lot about you."

Colin shook his hand, noting the firm grip. "Nice to meet you, Ryan. She told me a bit about you too. Shall we go in?"

When they were being seated, Ryan asked if they could be seated out of the way. It had been a trick Colin had used when he was dating while in the closet. But Ryan had been married to a man, so he wasn’t in the closet. The only other thing he could be hiding was…Colin himself. Colin took a moment to observe Ryan more closely. He seemed nice enough, but there was a hint of tension in his posture.

"So, Mrs. Higgins said you're her nephew?" Colin began, he could have kicked himself, Ryan had said his aunt Julie when he introduced himself.

Ryan nodded, taking a sip of water. "Yes, that's right. She's been like a second mother to me, especially after my own mother passed away."

"I'm sorry to hear that. She mentioned you have a son?"

A small smile tugged at Ryan's lips. "Yes, Ethan. He's eight. A handful, but a great kid."

Colin nodded, unsure of how to respond. He’d never really thought about having kids, at least not anytime soon. The conversation shifted to lighter topics, but there was an underlying current of discomfort.

"So, you play for Richmond, right?" Ryan asked, though his tone lacked enthusiasm.

Colin nodded. "Yeah, I do. Do you follow football?"

Ryan shook his head, a slight grimace crossing his face. "Not really, no. Actually, I kind of hate it. Never saw the appeal, to be honest."

Colin blinked, taken aback. "Oh, well, to each their own, I guess."

The conversation stumbled on, each revelation widening the chasm between them. Ryan talked about his job in IT, Colin was good if his laptop didn’t crash when he was watching a movie. His love for classical music but not ballet, how did that make sense? Colin liked Rap, musicals and just really anything; he didn’t pigeon hold himself to things he liked.

Ryan had a passion for hiking, Colin’s whole life was exercise, he couldn’t think of anything else he wanted to do on his off time. Colin tried to engage, but it was clear their interests were worlds apart and Ryan didn’t want to engage.

As the evening wore on, the topic inevitably shifted to the leaked videos. Colin's stomach tightened at the mention. Was this going to be his life now?

"I'm really sorry about what happened with those videos," Ryan said, his tone sincere but with a hint of discomfort. "Must have been tough."

Colin nodded, feeling the familiar sting of embarrassment. "Yeah, it was. Still is, sometimes."

Ryan looked down at his drink, swirling the liquid around. "I won't lie, it's a bit of a deal-breaker for me. I have to think about my son, and I just... it’s not the kind of stuff I want him around.”

Colin was confused how his private sex life was anyone’s business but his own. But he didn’t want Mrs. Higgins to be upset if he told her nephew off.

"I understand.” He even sounded like he meant it.

Ryan hesitated, then sighed. "Look, Colin, you seem like a great guy, but I don't think we're a good match. However, I do think you might be a great fit for my best mate."

Colin raised an eyebrow. "Your best mate?"

"Yeah, he doesn’t follow football but does like sports in general. He doesn’t have any children, so he doesn’t have to worry about the company he keeps. He's a really good guy. His name is Mi—"

Company he keeps?

Colin held up a hand, stopping him. "Ryan, I appreciate the thought, but I'm not looking to be set up again. This was...enough." He pulled out his wallet and took out the money for the entire bill and threw it on the table. “It’s been something,” he said as he stood up.

Ryan nodded, looking glad that the night was over, it was the first thing they agreed on.

As Colin went home, he couldn't shake the feeling of disappointment. He hadn’t wanted to go on the date but being told having a sex life at all is wrong. Yeah, he made videos with some of his partners, big deal. With Jan, they had been drinking and Colin thought it would be funny. Two of the other videos were with boyfriends at the time. The videos were special. Should he have deleted them? Yeah, but sometimes his memories were all he had. The two others had been one-night stands, and they were really into the videos, those two were recorded from their phones.

It wasn't just the lack of shared interests that stopped him and Ryan; it was the fundamental differences in their lives and outlooks. He wasn’t a judgmental knob.

He thought back to his previous relationships, realizing that his love life had always been complicated. Being a professional athlete had its perks, but it also came with its own set of challenges. This would be the first time he would be able to live his life in the open. No way would he have wanted to be outed but he couldn’t take it back. So, he might as well make the best of it.

There was Luke, a fellow footballer from an opposing club. They had an instant connection. But their competitive natures often clashed, leading to intense arguments. The pressure of their careers took its toll, and after a particularly heated argument, they decided to part ways. Luke was married to a woman with kids now, but he was bi so at least it seemed to be for love.

Colin sighed, remembering the hope he’d felt at the start of each relationship, and the heartache that followed when things didn’t work out. He wondered if he’d ever find someone who could understand the complexities of his life, someone who wouldn’t be scared off by the challenges. Some thought he would cheat as soon as they had an away game. They didn’t understand there was no sex at all during those times, it was work not pleasure.

As the uber pulled into his driveway, Colin's heart sank. There, sprayed across the front of the glass of his house in bright red paint, were the same hateful slurs that had been on his hotel room in Cardiff.

It wasn't just an isolated incident. Whoever had done this was closer to home than he'd thought. The realization hit him like a punch in the gut. He wasn't safe, not even in his own home.

Colin stepped out of the car, his hands trembling as he pulled out his phone. He took pictures of the graffiti, his mind a whirlwind of anger, fear, and frustration. He called the police, reporting the vandalism, then sat on his porch, waiting for them to arrive.

As he sat there, he thought about the evening, about Ryan and his polite rejection. It seemed trivial now, compared to this. He felt a wave of exhaustion wash over him, the weight of everything pressing down on his shoulders.

When the police arrived, Colin showed them the graffiti, explaining about the previous incident in Cardiff. They took his statement, promising to investigate, but Colin couldn't shake the feeling of helplessness. The security video of his house was next to useless, it was one person in a dark hoodie. Something bothered him about how the figure moved but he couldn’t place it. He would have to turn on the motion detection to his cameras. He had them off because he got tired of squirrels mating on his screen.

After they left, he went inside, locking the door behind him. He leaned against the wall, sliding down to sit on the floor, his head in his hands.

He sat there for a while, composing himself. He took a deep breath, wiping his eyes. He couldn't let this break him. He had to be the strong and capable man he knew he was.

Colin stood up, looking around his house. It was just a building, but it was his sanctuary. He wouldn't let anyone take that away from him. He went to the kitchen, grabbing a bucket and a sponge. He filled the bucket with soapy water and went outside to start scrubbing the graffiti off the glass.

As he worked, he thought about the team. For a split second he thought about calling someone from the team but decided not to. This wasn’t their problem, it was his and his alone.

By the time he finished, his arms ached, but the hateful words were gone. He stood back, looking at the clean glass. It was a small victory, but it was his.

Colin went back inside, taking a long, hot shower. Washing the horrible date and everything from tonight off of him. He had been stupid letting someone set him up.

He didn’t want to be alone tonight, but he didn’t want to tell anyone what happened. He thought about calling Jan, but he didn’t think he would come over this late at night. So, he did the next best thing, he drank until he passed out.

Chapter Text

“We need to do something, Colin hasn’t been himself in the last few days.” They were getting ready for training. Colin was coming with Jan Maas, but they were running late for some reason.

Now that Colin was off the injured list and starting again, Isaac thought he would be back to normal. Colin was one of the most genuinely happy people he had ever met. Sure, he had his bad days, but they were few and far between. But lately, like since they got back from Cardiff it has been like a black cloud has been hanging over his head.

For over two months Colin had worked hard just to get back to pre-accident shape and now he was so everything should be fine. His leg wasn’t even bothering him any longer, he had told Isaac. Even the paparazzi had started to leave Colin alone after the hotel incident made news. The best news was that the person that leaked all the pictures, videos and voicemails had been identified by one Trent Crimm formally of the Independent.

Turns out Trent’s boss doesn’t want to be libel if it doesn’t fall in Trent’s favor. But so far it looked like the police had found a lot of evidence. So, Colin should be happy, but he wasn’t, and it was driving Isaac crazy.

“Maybe it’s the car thing. We really don’t have a say over him not having a car. We’re treating him like a child. But he’s done as we asked without much pushback. Maybe it’s time for him to get another one,” Sam said.

“He almost died,” Isaac pointed out.

“We’ll just have him get a less powerful car,” Jamie said.

“And how will we do that? It’s not like we can force him to buy a sensible car,” Zoreaux said.

“Maybe if we send someone that he can’t say no to,” Sam said.

“Someone easy going,” Bumbercatch said.

“Someone who can talk him into getting a car that won’t kill him,” Dixon said.

They all looked at Dani, who had been nodding along with everything being said. Colin wouldn’t be able to tell Dani no, it was like telling a puppy it was bad.

“What?” Dani asked.

“You go with Colin and gently guide him to buying a car he can handle,” Sam said.

“Ay, I don’t know. I don’t like lying.”

“You don’t have to lie, just make sure he doesn’t get a car that will kill him,” Isaac said.

Dani looked worried but nodded. If anyone could get Colin to agree it would be Dani. He had an agreeable way about him that you just wanted to go along with him.

“Are you sure you want to go with me?” Colin asked Dani.

When he got to the clubhouse yesterday the guys told him that if he wanted to get another car, they wouldn’t fight him. He was so glad, he’s always had a car since he was eighteen. His first was a beat-up Citroen AX that belonged to his grandmother.

“Yes. I can’t wait,” Dani said, smiling.

“Alright, boyo.”

He needed a new car, and he needed help making a smart choice this time. His last purchase ended in a spectacular accident. That’s when Dani offered to help.

 “Ready to find the perfect car?”

Colin smiled. “Yeah, thanks for coming, Dani. I really appreciate it.”

“Of course! Let’s go!” Dani replied enthusiastically.

They set off to the first dealership, a high-end showroom in the heart of London.

The first dealership was everything Colin dreamed of. Sleek, high-performance sports cars lined the showroom floor. The saleswoman saw a sale when she saw them walking in.

“Welcome. How can I assist you today?”

Colin’s eyes lit up when he saw a bright red Ferrari 488 GTB. “How about that one?”

Dani’s eyes widened. “Colin, that’s a Ferrari! Those are very fast and very difficult to handle.”

The saleswoman stepped in smoothly, clearly hoping to save the sale. “The Ferrari 488 GTB is known for its speed and agility. Would you like to take it for a test drive?”

Colin nodded eagerly. The saleswoman handed him the keys and climbed into the passengers’ seat for the test drive.

The Ferrari roared to life, and Colin couldn’t stand how excited he was. However, as soon as they hit the road, he struggled to handle the car’s immense power. The saleswoman clung to her seatbelt, eyes wide with fear.

Colin reluctantly turned back to the dealership. “Thanks for the test drive, but I don’t think this is the one.”

Next, they tried a McLaren 720S. The test drive was a repeat of the Ferrari experience, except the saleswoman decided not to ride with him so Dani did. Then Dani started whispering the Hail Mary almost non-stop. Colin finally conceded and returned to the dealership.

“How about a Lamborghini Huracan?” the saleswoman suggested.

“Not another Lamborghini, remember what happened last time,” Dani said.

Colin decided not to take that one for a test drive.

“Maybe not this one either,” Colin said.

They finally tried a Porsche 911 GT2 RS. The drive was smoother, but still too much for Colin. Dani’s whispered prayers and the salesman’s fear were clear indicators.

“Let’s look at some other options,” Dani suggested gently.

The next stop was a dealership known for reliable and safe vehicles, aka boring cars. Dani seemed more relaxed here, and Colin tried to keep an open mind, but it was hard.

“Hello, gentlemen! What are we looking for today?” the cheerful salesman asked.

Dani nodded enthusiastically. “We are looking for a nice, clean and safe car.”

The salesman led them to a Honda Civic. “This is one of our best-sellers. Safe, reliable, and great fuel economy.”

Colin test-drove the Civic with both Dani and the salesman in the car. He found it easy to handle but couldn’t muster much enthusiasm. “It’s…nice. Kind of boring, though.”

Next, they tried a Toyota Camry. “The Camry is known for its reliability and comfort. Perfect for daily driving.”

Colin drove it again with Dani and the salesman. “This is okay, but it’s so slow,” he complained.

The salesman then pointed out a Subaru Outback. “This one is great for all kinds of weather and has excellent safety ratings.”

Colin drove it and found it stable but uninspiring. “It’s kind of drab.”

Finally, they looked at a Volkswagen Golf. “Compact, efficient, and a lot of fun to drive.”

Colin test-drove the Golf with Dani and the salesman. “It’s nice, but it feels…sex-repellent.”

Dani couldn’t help but laugh at Colin’s descriptions. “Okay, Colin, let’s find something a bit more exciting.”

At the next dealership, they were greeted by a friendly woman who listened carefully to Colin’s needs.

“He’s looking for a car that’s sporty but also easy to handle,” Dani explained.

The woman nodded. “I have just the thing. Have you considered the Mazda MX-5 Miata? It’s a sports car but is very driver friendly.”

Colin’s interest was piqued. The Miata was sleek and sporty but didn’t have the intimidating presence of the other sports cars. He took it for a test drive with Dani. The ride was smooth and controlled, and Colin felt confident behind the wheel.

“What do you think, Dani?” Colin asked as they returned to the dealership.

Dani grinned. “I think it’s a great choice. It’s sporty but also safe.”

But Colin hated it. Why was it so hard to get something that he wanted? He knew what they were doing. They sent Dani with him because with anyone else he would have told them to mind their own business when they tried to talk him out of a car.

Their last stop was a dealership that specialized in high-performance vehicles. Colin was immediately drawn to a Jaguar F-Type.

“This is the Jaguar F-Type. It’s a sports car but is known for its balanced performance and ease of handling,” the salesman explained.

Colin took it for a spin with Dani. The ride was exhilarating but not overwhelming. The car felt smooth and responsive, and Colin could see himself driving it every day.

“What do you think, Dani?” Colin asked as they parked the car back at the dealership.

Dani nodded approvingly. “I like it and didn’t fear for my life.”

Colin felt a surge of excitement. This was the car he had been looking for. It had the speed and style he wanted but was also practical enough to keep his friends happy. Dani laughed when Colin picked the one that was canary yellow. He couldn’t help it, he liked to stand out and now that he wasn’t in the closet he could do it more.

They finalized the paperwork, and Colin drove off the lot in his new car. He treated Dani to lunch for helping him out and they had a good day.

They said their goodbyes and Colin went home. It felt so good to have a car again. It was strange that he wasn’t struggling with it but in a good way. He couldn’t wait to show it off tomorrow.

When he pulled up to his house he saw an unfamiliar car in the drive. Someone was sitting in front of his door. Why hadn’t his alarm gone off? He set it up to tell him if someone was near his house.

As he got out of his new car, he saw who it was.

“What are you doing here?”

“I need your help, little brother.”

Chapter Text

Colin invited his brother in and got him a drink. Dylan made a joke about vanilla vodka, but Colin had just gotten him a beer, not anything stronger because he didn’t plan for Dylan to stay the night.

“I almost thought I’d come to the wrong place. This is nice…and expensive. So is that new car you pulled up in. What it must be like to total one expensive sports car and then just buy another one without a second thought.”

“Did you come here for a reason?” Colin had long given up on caring what his brother thought.

“I need money.”

“Why? I thought you had such a good job.” At least that’s what his mother kept saying.

“I’ve been lying. Telling Mam I need to move home because I’ve been sacked, it’s too embarrassing. Not as embarrassing than telling my little brother.”

“Then why not just tell them, they’ll give you the money.”

“They don’t have the kind of money I need.”

That worried him. “How much are we talking about?”

Dylan took a breath and ran a hand through his hair, something he did when he was nervous. “400,000 pounds.”

“What the hell? How? Why?”

“I owe some money to some very not nice men.”

“Please tell me you’re not gambling again.” His brother had a gambling problem but hadn’t gambled since Colin was eighteen, at least that’s what he hoped.

“I thought I could control it. I wasn’t young and stupid anymore. But I kept losing money, betting more money to win back the money I lost. Then I borrowed some money to cover my debt.”

“Please tell me you didn’t get money from a loan shark.”

“I fucked up. I know.”

“It’s not like I have that kind of money in the piggybank on my desk.”

“You have a piggybank on your desk?”

So not the point. “I’m just saying I don’t have that kind of money here.”

“What?”

“For something like that I have to go through my accountant.”

His mother had helped him find an accountant when he signed with Cardiff. He liked having someone else like Don, his accountant, to take care of the taxes and such. He also had an investment manager to invest in things for him. But money that he could just take out like that, he didn’t have. He could but he would have to have a plausible excuse for Don. Ever since the magic bean scam Don had been more critical. It’s not as dumb as people think, he knew they weren’t magic, they didn’t even sing.

“But you can get it right?”

“Yeah, I guess I could.”  He had the money, he had it and much more but that wasn’t the point.

Dylan looked at him expectantly, so Colin called his accountant. Don wasn’t happy about being called at home but was even more unhappy to find out Colin wanted 400,000 by tomorrow.

“You just bought an expensive car. What do you need this money for?” He had texted Don earlier that he was buying a new car.

“It’s my money and I don’t have to have you okay everything I do with it.”

“Fine. I’ll have the money for you tomorrow,” Don snapped before hanging up.

“I’ll have it by tomorrow,” he told Dylan, shoving his phone in his pocket. He didn’t want something happening to Dylan. “You promise this isn’t like before?”

The reason why they had a strained relationship wasn’t all about jealousy. That was true on Dylan’s part but not Colin’s. He tried to have a good relationship with him until he joined Cardiff. People knew they had a falling out but not why except their Nan who died a few years after that.

Colin had just signed onto Cardiff and got his signing bonus. His mother took him and helped him get everything set up. Then he hired Don, and everything seemed to be great. Colin had moved into a flat near the stadium because he was young and thought that’s what you do. One day his brother showed up there beat to hell and back. Saying he owed money to some dangerous people.

Colin knew he’d be able to help, he had more money than he knew what to do with. But the money Dylan needed was over half of Colin’s signing bonus. A lot of fucking money.

His nan just happened to come by his flat while he was trying to get the money. She called him an idiot for spending all that just after signing. He trusted her not to tell his parents, so he told her about Dylan’s situation.

She got mad and left only to return with Dylan a few hours later. It was then he found out there was no dangerous men. Dylan had one of his friends beat him up to trick Colin into handing over his bonus.

Pretty much the end to their brotherly relationship because Colin, who had been the only one to try and keep it going, had just given up. The worst part was he would have probably given him the money if he had just asked for it, it wasn’t like he couldn’t afford it. He had been eighteen, stupid and had wanted his brother’s acceptance since always.

“I swear, it’s not like before. I am in real trouble here. In fact, so are you and I’m so sorry for that.”

“What?”

“They’ve made some threats to you and proved that they could get to you.”

“Meaning?”

“Meaning when your hotel room was vandalized it was them. They also sent me a shot of the front of your place here, with that word painted on it. I’m so sorry.”

“They’re the ones that have been harassing me?” he asked, unable to believe what he was hearing. “Why the gay slurs?” If it was just to prove they could get to him, why did it have to be about that?

“I guess it would be easier to cover them. Also, a good dose of regular old homophobia.”

“I’ve been scared to go anywhere at night. Terrified I’m going to be killed just because I’m gay. Do you have any idea how dangerous some football fans can be? Do you have any idea how it’s been like since I got outed? I’ve only had one game and I was screamed at by fans some nasty things before they were removed. And people are now after me because you borrowed money from someone you shouldn’t have?

“I’m trying to be supportive here but for fuck’s sake. You’ve treated me like rubbish since the first time I took the football pitch and was better than you.” He knew he wasn’t the best in the game, but he had worked damn hard to get where he was and a good bit of luck that he had actual talent for it. “Do you have any idea how hard it is being gay and being in football?”

“God, do you ever stop whining? This poor as me act got tired when we were kids. You need to grow up and grow a pair.”

“I’ll pay off your debt, then I don’t want to see you again. Give me the name of the man, I’ll take the money to him myself.”

“What? Why?”

“If you’re gambling again, I can’t trust you to actually give him the money and not try to double it. So, give me his name and number.”

“No.”

“This is the only way I’m going to pay it.”

“FUCK YOU!” Dylan yelled before storming out of the house.

Colin walked to the door and saw Dylan standing beside his new car. Then after moment when Colin opened the door, Dylan flipped him off and got in his car. After Dylan left, Colin went to the side of his car where Dylan had been standing. He saw what he feared. Dylan had keyed his brand-new car with the word gwrywgydiwr. He had to give it to him, he did that fast. Gwrywgydiwr was a derogatory term in Welsh for a gay man. His brother had been the first, he told that he liked boys, he had been eight and didn’t even know it was strange. He just told Dylan he wanted to marry some boy at school that he couldn’t remember now.

Dylan had said boys don’t marry boys and that was that. But after he officially came out to his family when he was twelve, his brother had never said anything bad about it. About everything else about Colin did but never that.

Nate had his phone sat on his counter as the voices had finally gone quiet. He didn’t know how he had accidentally gotten a call from Colin, but he knew it was a mistake. The one thing Nate was sure of is he knew a lie when he heard one and the brother was lying through his fucking teeth. Colin was getting robbed blind by his brother and didn’t even know it.

Chapter Text

“Where’s Colin?” Nate asked the next morning.

He had wanted to talk to Colin about what he had heard. They may have had their differences; in the beginning, that had been on Colin and Isaac. Lately though, it was on Nate. Isaac and Colin had changed how they treated him, but lately, he had been taking his anger and contempt for himself out on Will and Colin. He wanted to do better, he needed to do better, and helping Colin might be the start of that.

“He called in sick today. Everyone line up, we’re going to do some running today,” Ted said. There was a collective groan from the group. The team ran every day, but at the beginning of training meant it was going to be an exhausting workout.

“Oh.” Had Colin really gone to see a loan shark on his own? Nate didn’t believe there was a loan shark at all. Meaning his brother could be lying in wait to do something horrible to him, especially if he had the money with him, knowing Colin he would.

“Hey, Ted, I need to take the day off.”

“Something wrong?”

“I just need a personal day.”

“Okay. You do what you need to do.”

Nate grabbed his things and left. He hadn’t been on the Colin ride roster, so it took him a bit to find out where Colin lived. Later, when he pulled up in front of Colin's house…mansion, it was hard not to feel a little envious.

He had heard Dani that morning talk about Colin’s new car but didn’t see one in the drive. Maybe it was in the garage. Nate knocked on the glass door and waited. It took a while, and Nate was starting to worry that Colin wasn’t there. But then he saw socked feet appear at the top of the stairs. Colin descended the stairs, and Nate saw his face and winced. It looked like he was beaten in the face with a brick.

Colin paused at the door, looking like he was debating whether to open it or not, but decided to open it.

“What the hell, Colin? What happened to you?”

“Nothing.”

“Don’t lie. You accidentally called me last night. I heard your fight with your brother about the money. The last thing I heard was you were going to meet the loan shark today. Please tell me you didn’t go alone?” It was still early, so Nate wondered what had really gone on.

“No. I didn’t have to go anywhere. Early this morning around 3 am, my brother and his friend showed up and stole about anything they could get their hands on in my house while a third friend used my face as a punching bag. You should see him now, though.”

“Did you hit him back?”

“Oh god no, I was too busy trying to cover my face. He kept threatening to rebreak my leg if I didn’t comply. He’s wearing my new trainers, so he’s doing pretty well today.” Colin broke out laughing but then grabbed his side and hissed.

“Why in the hell are you laughing?”

“You wouldn’t get it.”

“Try me.”

“They stole about 10,000 pounds worth of stuff from here.”

“And?”

“Upstairs under my bed are 5, 1-kilo bars of gold. Depending on the market right now, that's worth around 300,000 pounds.”

Nate just sat there and stared at him for the longest time. “Are-are you telling me you’re hiding gold in your bedroom?”

“Yeah. Bumbercatch told me last year I needed it in case of a class war.”

“Yeah, class war.” Colin had way too much money for his own good. “Anyway, have you called the police?”

Colin looked at him through his one good eye. “What? I’m not calling the police on my brother.”

“They could have killed you.”

“They were just angry, they’ll get over it.”

“What kind of security do you have?” Clearly, Colin wasn’t going to grass on his brother.

“I’m really fine. I’ve been taking care of myself since I was eighteen, there’s no problem.”

“And when the team sees your face?”

“I’ll think of something.”

Nate knew he wasn’t getting anywhere, so he decided to leave. As he got to the door, he turned around. “Hey, Colin. I just wanted to tell you I’m sorry for what I said that day. I took out my own hurt on you, and that wasn’t right.”

“It’s all good, Boyo.” Colin suddenly hugged him but then stepped back quickly. “That hurt,” he said, holding his side again.

“Maybe you should have that looked at.”

“Bruised kidney, I don’t need a doctor telling me that.”

“If you’re sure.”

“I am. Thanks, though.”

Colin knew he would have a hard time convincing Isaac and the team of any lie he came up with about why he was beat up. But for some reason, Nate showed up to see if he was okay and to apologize. He would never have expected that from Nate. So, he gave him a hug like he would one of the team, but he forgot he was hurt everywhere.

After Nate was gone, Colin slowly walked back up his stairs. As he walked, he could swear he was forgetting something. He shook his head; it must not have been that important.

Jan decided to check on Colin. He hadn’t been answering anyone's calls all day. It was strange because Dani had said he had been so excited about his new car. When Jan knocked on the door, there was no answer. He tried the door handle, which was unlocked. He went inside, calling out Colin's name. There was no response.

"Colin?" he said again, walking through the house. There was no sign of Colin, but the place was trashed. The living room had been ransacked, furniture overturned, and drawers emptied onto the floor. It was clear that there had been a struggle. Jan called the police, reporting the break-in.

When the police arrived, they did a thorough search of the house, finding nothing missing except for a few electronics. Jan called the team; they all came over as fast as they could. So did Ms. Welton, Coach Lasso, Coach Beard, Roy, and Keeley.

The police made him wait outside, and the whole road now had Richmond players and staff parked on the side of it, even though some rode together.

"Where is he?" Isaac demanded. He was one of the first to arrive. Only Keeley beat him because she lived closer.

They were just starting to get worked up into a real frenzy when a car stopped at the end of the drive, and Colin stepped out. He slowly walked up the driveway as the car drove away. Jan could see him trying to understand what was going on.

"What happened?" Colin asked as he approached.

"We were about to ask you the same thing," Isaac said, giving Colin a quick once-over. "You look like shit."

Colin nodded. "I know."

"Someone broke in. They ransacked the place they stole most of your electronics."

"What?"

"Do you know who might have done this?" one of the policemen asked.

Colin shook his head. "No."

The policeman nodded. "We'll need a list of everything that's missing."

"There's nothing missing. Just some electronics."

The policeman nodded again. "We'll need to take fingerprints and photographs of the damage."

"I'm not making a report. You might as well leave," Colin said, still slowly walking to the house.

The policeman frowned. "We can't just leave. This is a crime scene."

Colin sighed. "I won't file a report, so no crime. You'll be wasting your time staying here."

The policeman looked at him in disbelief. "You're not filing a report?"

"Nope."

"Why not?"

"Because I don't want to."

"Sir, if you don't file a report, we can't investigate."

Colin shrugged. "Not my problem."

The policeman shook his head. "Fine. If you change your mind, let us know."

Colin waved them off. "Sure." The cop handed Colin a card and gathered the other law enforcement, and within five minutes, they were gone.

"You all can leave now," Colin said.

"None of us are going anywhere until we have an answer," Roy growled.

Colin sighed and headed inside. Everyone followed.

Once everyone was inside, Colin started cleaning up. The others joined in helping him.

Isaac and Sam immediately began picking up the furniture and putting it back in place. Jan and Zoreaux put the drawers back in the desk and tidied up the contents. Jamie picked up the books from the floor and placed them back on the bookshelves. Ted, Beard, Rebecca, Roy, and Keeley pitched in wherever they could. Most of the other guys went around making sure everything was secure.

"Did they get the gold?" Bumbercatch asked Colin, gaining attention from everyone in the area.

"No, it's fine."

"Gold?" Jamie asked.

"Who said anything about gold?" Bumbercatch asked suspiciously.

"You did," Sam said.

"Why are all of you so obsessed with the gold...if there is gold, and I'm not saying there is," Bumbercatch said, eyeing everyone. "It's not like it will protect you when the uprising happens."

"Uprising?" Jan asked.

"You know what? Let's change the subject," Colin said, hoping to avoid any more questions about the gold.

As Bumbercatch walked past him, he whispered, "Don't tell them about the gold, they can't be trusted."

"Right. The gold is none of their business," Colin whispered back.

Bumbercatch nodded sagely and walked away.

Isaac looked between him and Bumbercatch but finally shook his head and looked back at Colin. "So, Colin, what really happened?" Isaac asked, giving Colin a hard look.

"My brother and his friends came by this morning and got a bit rowdy," Colin explained, avoiding everyone's gaze.

"Your face says it was more than a bit rowdy," Ms. Welton said.

"Yeah, well, it is what it is," Colin said with a shrug.

"Your brother did this to you?" Isaac asked.

"No, he wouldn't ever hurt me."

"Then who did?"

Colin sighed. "Just drop it."

"Not to sound crass, but I cannot just drop it. You are an investment. I pay you to do a job, and you can't do that job in the hospital. So, you need to tell us what's going on," Ms. Welton said.

"You want the truth? Okay, here it is...I fell."

"You fell?" Isaac repeated incredulously.

"Yes, I fell."

"How did you fall?"

"I tripped."

"Tripped over what?"

"My cat."

"You don't have a cat, bruv."

Just at that moment, a black cat sauntered into the large room they were standing in. The cat circled almost everyone's legs and purred.

"See? My cat."

"Where did you get a cat?" Jan asked, crouching down to pet the creature.

"I found it."

"Where did you find it?" Dani asked.

"In the garden."

"You don't have a garden," Jamie said.

"Fine, I found it on the street."

"You found it on the street?" Isaac asked suspiciously.

"Yes, I found it on the street."

"Now try the truth," Ms. Welton said. Colin didn't know why, but he couldn't lie when she was staring at him like that. She was a terrifying woman.

"Fine. I found him in a dumpster behind a pizza place I stopped at last night."

"Pizza, when you have a game in two days," Isaac said, shaking his head.

"I'm sorry."

"That's not the point, Colin. Who cares if he ate pizza? We have more important things to think about right now," Ms. Welton said.

"I can play. I just got back from the doctor. Everything is superficial. I'll be fine by the time for Bradford City."

"No, you're sitting that game out. I'm not having you represent our club looking like you've joined a fight club. Everyone go home; let's leave Colin to think about his mistakes."

Everyone reluctantly left, including Isaac. Colin watched them go, wishing he could tell them the truth. But he couldn't. He couldn't let his brother go to jail, no matter what.

"Come here," he said to Leon. He really needed to take him to the vet. He was glad no one asked him where his car was. It was in the garage. He didn't want them to ask about the word scratched into it.

Chapter Text

Things went back to normal surprisingly fast. Once Colin refused to talk anymore about what happened, people had no choice but to let it go. A week had passed and now Colin could see out of both eyes and could breathe semi-normally. Isaac hadn’t forgiven him for not turning Dylan into the police. But for the most part people seemed to have moved on.

Leon was now vetted, vexed and chipped. The vet also said that Leon was a girl. Like how could he have known? It’s not like she was wearing a bow when he found her. He was still going to call her Leon, she likes it.

He had also asked Ms. Welton if he could bring Leon to the clubhouse. She gave him permission but only on Thursdays. The other players that had animals were married so their pets were already taken care of. He asked around if he should hire someone to come and spend time with her, but Higgins thought that she should get used to the house before adding any new people to the mix.

Luckily, it was Thursday, so Leon had come with him. He was riding in with Sam because his brand-new car was in the shop getting fixed. That scratch that Dylan had put on it was deeper than he first thought.

“If she’s a girl, why keep calling her Leon?” Sam asked.

They were halfway to the clubhouse. Leon was sleeping in his lap, her carrier in the backseat. She didn’t like the carrier, so he didn’t put her in it, much to Sam’s slight annoyance.

“She likes Leon. She comes to it and everything.” She didn’t but he didn’t need to know that. She did come to Boyo though but that might get confusing.

He had gotten her everything the saleswoman showed him at the pet shop. She hated all the toys, she didn’t care for her bed or her scratching posts or even the cat tree. She hated it all. She also didn’t like to be held or petted unless he was playing video games, she would try to push the controller out of his hands with her head.

“Isaac still giving you the silent treatment?” Sam asked.

He tried not to let it get to him, but it did. Isaac is his best friend and not having him talking to him hurts. “I’ve asked him to go out and have a drink with me, but he refused. He’s always been so stubborn, besides time on the pitch, he’s never been angry at me before.”

“Why didn’t you press charges?”

“He’s my brother.”

“But he robbed you and had his friend beat you up. I don’t get it.”

“If I press charges, my mother will never forgive me and disown me.”

“She wouldn’t.”

“She would. Please drop it. I’ve always known I wasn’t the favorite, let me stay second at least. I wasn’t lying before, my nana loved me and knew what Dylan was like, but she still favored him. If he got relegated, I’m sure she would have spoken to him again.”

Maybe he wasn’t being fair, she died less than a year after Cardiff got the drop. Maybe with more time she would have forgiven him.

“You know that’s not on you, right? Getting relegated isn’t just one player’s fault. You should know that, look at us.”

“Yeah,” he said but it was hard to believe it.

The song Jessie’s Girl filled the car. “Hey, it’s my mam, do you mind?” he asked Sam.

“No, go ahead.”

Colin accepted the call and heard his mother’s angry breathing right away. “Mam, hi,” he said trying to sound cheery.

“Did you really refuse to lend your brother money?”

“What?”

“Dylan said he went to you to ask to borrow some money to pay off a debt from a bad business deal. But you lorded your money over him then refused to even help.”

Nothing he could say would sway her, he learned a long time ago not to even try. “I’m at the clubhouse. I need to start training. I’ll call and talk to you later.” He disconnected without her saying another word.

“Everything okay?” Sam asked.

“Yeah.”

“Can I ask you something?”

Colin really hoped it wasn’t anything about his sex life, he was getting very tired of that.

“Your ringtone for your mother is Jessie’s Girl, why?”

Colin smiled. “Yeah, my dad’s name is Jesse, so it seemed fitting.”

“But your ringtone for her is Jessie’s Girl.”

Why was Sam asking like that? “Yes.”

“Jessie’s Girl is about a man being attracted to his friend Jessie’s girlfriend…sexually.”

“You’re joking.”

“How can it be your ringtone, and you not know the song?”

“It only plays for about five seconds. Are you saying I’ve had a song about wanting to have sex with my mother on my phone?”

“Not exactly but it’s a strange choice for a son for his mother.”

“Eww.” Colin picked up his phone and programed another song for her. “How about Summer of 69?”

“Metaphor about sex.”

“So, no. Shut up and Drive by Rihanna?”

“Now you have to be joking.”

“How do you know all this?”

“How do you not know?”

Colin looked down at his phone. “Yeah, got me, boyo.” He had not been joking. Quickly he just set the ringtone to Like a Prayer, he loved Madonna, and his mother was very religious, works for both of them.

Apparently, him messing with his phone was too distracting to Leon because she stood up in his lap and stretched out before laying down again.

Training went well and he was feeling like himself again. Isaac seemed to be thawing to him too. He had even asked Colin to go out with him this weekend on a double date. Colin wanted to say no but if Isaac was talking to him again, he would do it.

He had downloaded Bantr and made an account like Keeley had asked. Since they were their major sponsor now, he wanted it to do well.

When it asked who he was looking for, he was able to but male down for the first time without fear of being outed. He hated the way everything happened, but he would never want to be in the closet again.

He had a message from a man by the screen name of Moreorless. They had been talking for weeks and he really liked him. The message was simple.

Moreorless- How would you rather die, fire or drowning?

12of22- Drowning, for sure.

Moreorless- Why?

12of22- Still have a chance to be brought back from drowning.

Moreorless- Good point.

He was killing it on this flirting thing without seeing the other person.

Moreorless- Hey, I was wondering if you would like to go out on a date.

Colin froze looking at the screen. He hadn’t been on a date since he was humiliated by Mrs. Higgins’s nephew. He must have taken too long thinking because another message popped up.

Moreorless- It’s okay if you don’t want to.

12of22- No, I do. When?

Moreorless- How about tonight?

Before he could change his mind, he agreed and threw his phone in his bag.

Colin was sitting at a very nice restaurant. He had been to plenty of them but not on dates. He was really nervous. The restaurant had been Moreorless’s choice. He probably had money if he picked this place. And he was able to get a reservation this short of notice so again, probably money. Not that Colin really cared but sometimes it was nice for someone else to treat. When he went out with the guys, they took turns.

He was wearing a suit that he had bought for the charity gala this year. This year they had forgone the auctioning off players and for that he was grateful. For the past two years prior, he had gotten the same very handsy businesswoman from Glasgow. She was the ex-wife of the owner of a very well-known cruise ship enterprise.

He checked his watch and saw that it was two minutes past the agreed to time. Before he could even be disappointed the sprinklers overhead went off and a loud alarm sounded.

“IF EVERYONE COULD MAKE AN ORDERLY EXIT TO THE FRONT DOORS, PLEASE!” the hostess yelled.

There were lots of running but he didn’t see the need for it, so he just got up and slowly left the restaurant. Instead of waiting for his date or to find out what happened, he caught a taxi and went home. He sent Moreorless a message.

12of22- Not sure if you were able to make it but the universe is telling me this isn’t the day.

Michael cursed at his fucking phone for the tenth time in twenty minutes. He was running late, and his phone had locked him out because it was a piece of garbage. He hoped his date was still at the restaurant and not too cross.

Something about 12of22 made him really want to meet him. He was funny and didn’t take himself so seriously, at least that’s how he portrayed himself on the app. Michael had just gotten back from Australia. Being an architect, he went where he was needed. He was pretty sought out not to sound too full of himself.

When he got near the restaurant, he realized he couldn’t get close. There were police cars, ambulances and two fire engines. He parked down the block and got out, heading to the crowded area.

“What’s going on?” he asked one of the many people standing in front of the restaurant.

“Kitchen caught on fire.”

“Why are the police here?”

“Fight between the chef and sous chef. It was wild, I got it on video. Want to see?”

“No, thanks.” There were so many people around, without his phone he wouldn’t be able to know if his date was here. Just then what he suspected was the chef and sous chef were taken out in handcuffs. Well, there won’t be any dinner tonight.

His phone finally unlocked, and he was able to open the app. He breathed a sigh of relief that 12of22 was alright and not waiting around for him in the sea of people.

Moreorless- How about this weekend?

12of22- I don’t think this was a good idea.

Michael tried several times to message him again but after the fourth it came back that there was no profile with that name. He just got ghosted, great.

Chapter Text

“I’m never dating again.”

“It wasn’t that bad, bruv,” Isaac said but wasn’t looking at Colin.

They had just got back from the double date, and it had been a disaster. His date was hot, educated and annoying. Like Jamie before he got his act together annoying. The man thought he was God’s gift to gay men everywhere and it was a turn off. But Isaac really liked the girl, Helen. Joe was Helen’s best friend. Apparently, he had dated her brother at university, but the brother broke up with him. The brother had made a great escape.

“It was that bad. I don’t know how many times I can say this, but I can find my own dates.”

“I know but she wouldn’t go out without him, and he knew you were on the team. You’re like a unicorn bruv, one of a kind.”

“I don’t think unicorns are real.”

“Exactly. No one knew there were gay footballers and now look. One.”

“There’s way more than that.”

“Who?”

“I’m not telling you. You can’t keep a secret and I won’t out anyone.”

“Come on, you can tell me. It’s Jamie, right?”

Colin laughed. He didn’t believe Jamie was completely straight but that wasn’t for him to say.

“Want to come in for a drink?”

“Nah, better get back home. Wouldn’t look right for the captain to be late for training tomorrow. Hey, what did he say that made you so mad?”

Before he left, he called Joe some not nice things.

“Let’s just say he did watch the videos and wasn’t shy about it.” Did he really think that Colin got off on everyone seeing him like that?

“Sorry, bruv. She told me that she didn’t think you and Joe would be suited together after I told her a little about you. She did say that you would be a good match for her brother Mi-

“Stop.”

“Yeah, okay. Night.”  

Colin decided to actually go to a gay club the next night. He just wanted to hook up and have meaningless sex. Jan Maas was dating someone now so their friends with benefits arrangement was on hold until he said something to anger his girlfriend. His last one he was way too truthful when she asked if he liked her outfit. She slashed his tires and Colin had to pick him up, that was when his Lamborghini was still alive.

Colin didn’t realize the club would be so full, there was a line. As he was considering going somewhere else one of the two bouncers called him over by his name.

“I’m sorry do I know you?” he asked.

The man was huge, at least 6’6 and 18 stone.

“No, Mr. Hughes, but there’s no reason for you to wait.”

“Huh?”

“Go on in, no cover charge either.”

This had never happened to him before…at least on his own. When he was with Dani, Isaac, Jamie, or Richard it happened all the time.

“Are you sure you know who I am?”

“Of course, go on in.”

“Okay, cheers.” He was stunned as he walked in. Maybe being out had more perks than he originally thought.

“Are you Colin Hughes?” the bartender asked.

“Uh, yeah.”

What followed was the strangest night of his life. He had played second fiddle to his teammates for so long it was weird being the center of attention. Now he had always done good with men, but this was something else completely.

He was drinking vanilla vodka with three men in the VIP section when he was approached by a gorgeous man.

“Excuse me,” the man said.

One of the men at his table turned and looked at the guy. “This table is full, sorry,” the man said but didn’t sound sorry.

“Yeah, I don’t care. I was just wondering if anyone of you have seen a phone around here. I was here an hour ago but seemed to have lost it somewhere.”

“I haven’t seen a phone, but we can look,” Colin told him. He stood up and had the other men stand up and look. Then Colin had an idea. “Why don’t you give me your number and I can call to see if it rings.” It was quieter in the VIP section than on the main floor.

“That’s what all the boys say,” the man said causing Colin to smile. The man gave Colin his number and Colin called it. A moment later a muffled sound came from under the cushion of the bench. He pulled the phone out and handed it to the man.

“Thanks so much. I would hate to have to get a new phone.”

“No problem. I’m Colin.”

“Nice to meet you, Colin. I’m Micheal. Well, I best be going.”

“Can’t you stay?”

Micheal looked at the other men at the table. “Best not. Thanks again.” Michael started to leave but Colin didn’t want him to go. He grabbed his phone and called the number back.

Michael was still in sight, he was facing the stairs but stopped to answer the phone.

“Want to go home with me tonight?” Colin asked.

Micheal turned around and looked at him and smiled.

“I’m probably going to regret this but…sure.”

"This place is incredible," Michael said as they walked through the door.

"Thanks. It's just a house, really."

Michael chuckled. "Just a house? It’s amazing. I do have to question the use of the glass though.”

“Everyone’s a critic.”

“Hey, I have the credentials to back up my critique.”

“How is that?”

“I’m an architect.”

“So, you build houses?”

“No, design. And not only houses, my specialty is in extreme architecture.”

“What does that mean?”

“I specialize in designs that are hard for one reason or another. Sometimes it’s climate, sometimes it’s how the land is hard to build on.”

“You must be really smart.”

“Yesterday instead of using cooking spray I accidently used air freshener.”

That made Colin smile even more. “I’ve never even done that.” He had done worse.

Michael laughed. “So, what do you do?”

“You don’t know?”

“No, should I?”

“I guess you don’t follow football.” At least he hoped he didn’t. It would be worse if he was a fan and still didn’t know who he was.

“No. I like sports just never got into it, never had a reason.”

He could feel his cheeks heat up. “I play for AFC Richmond.”

“You’re a footballer. I would have never guessed.”

“What would your guess have been?”

Micheal looked at him and tilted his head to the side. “When I saw you earlier my guess would have been a trust fund brat, living off your family’s wealth.”

Colin laughed. “When I was twelve my mother had me lying to the server so I would get the child’s price. So, no trust fund.”

“Self-made man, that’s so hot.”

“So, you want a tour of my bedroom?”

“I’d love one.”

Chapter Text

They were on their way back home from a disappointing tie with Crystal Palace. Since the stadium isn’t far from Richmond it was a day trip. Meaning they woke up in their own beds and would be going to bed there too.

Well, he wouldn’t be sleeping in his own bed tonight. Michael was back from his latest job and Colin was going to spend the rest of the weekend with him. They had been dating for only three weeks and most of that has been through text because Michael had been in Greenland, fixing some other architect’s mistakes.

They weren’t exclusive or anything, but he thought with time they might be. The only real issue was that Michael was worried about being exclusive with a footballer because they had a reputation for not being faithful. Colin had never cheated on a boyfriend but now that he was out, he got way more offers than he thought was possible. Michael didn’t accuse him of taking anyone up on that, but he had been burned before so Colin understood.

It was so early in their relationship that Colin was okay with him not trusting him yet. Footballers do have a reputation for sleeping around even when they are married. They didn’t have many married players on the Richmond team or even ones in serious relationships. Isaac was still dating Helen, and it looked like it was getting serious. Isaac had been after him to have a double date because he wanted to meet what he called Colin’s mystery man.

It wasn’t that he was ashamed of being with Michael, the opposite really. He didn’t understand how someone as smart, handsome and genuinely good as Michael could want to be with him.

While his new car was much easier to handle, he had forgotten he wasn’t actually that good of a driver in a normal car. So, Michael refused to ride with him, it was Michael driving, or they would take a cab. It didn’t make him mad, in fact he liked it. He liked a lot about Michael and was having a hard time to keep it casual. After all they had only actually been on four dates because of both of their careers. He hadn’t even told Isaac his name.

“Hey, bruv, let’s go out tonight. Helen just texted that she has to go visit her parents, something about her brother.”

“Can’t, I have plans.”

“Oooh,” Richard said from across the bus aisle.

“When are we going to meet the new boyfriend?” Sam asked.

“Well, he’s not my boyfriend, he’s just a man I’ve been seeing.”

“Correct me if I’m wrong but that sounds like a boyfriend,” Coach Lasso said from the front of the bus.

“It’s just casual right now,” Colin said, hoping to shut everyone up. Nothing ruined a budding relationship faster than nosy friends.

The one thing about Michael that made him even more attracted to him was the videos. He had wanted to know what Michael thought. After the horrible date with whats-his-name he didn’t want to be shocked by finding out if he was disgusted by it.

Michael had been honest, it wouldn’t be something he would do but he put the blame where it belonged…on the reporter who leaked it. Michael was actually much more…laid back than any of his exes which was rather refreshing. He wasn’t jealous even though they weren’t exclusive, although Colin couldn’t say the same about himself. He wondered way too much about who Michael was spending his time with when he wasn’t with him. It wasn’t that he was bothered by Michael sleeping with other men, it was worry that he would fall for one of them and break it off with Colin.

Men usually just liked to be with a footballer, those were just good for sex. Then there were the ones that were okay with being a secret only to get tired and move on. This is the first time he could be open with his relationship. It wasn’t like he wanted to be some spokesman for gay athletes everywhere, he just wanted to be himself and that includes dating who he wants.

“How long have you two been dating?” Will asked.

“Three weeks.”

“Why are we talking about this then? It’s not a relationship until the first pregnancy scare,” Zoreaux said.

“Not really a worry I have,” Colin said.

“Oh, yeah, sweet,” Zoreaux said.

“Have you ever had sex with a woman?” Isaac asked.

“No. I’m gay.”

“Well, how do you know you won’t like it if you don’t try it?” Zoreaux asked.

Colin groaned. He had been hearing the same argument from both his father and brother since he was a teenager.

“How do you know you’re completely straight if you haven’t had sex with a man?” he countered.

“I wondered that too, so I made sure.” Everyone was looking at Jamie for a few long moments. “What?”

“Are you saying you had sex with a man?” Zoreaux asked.

“Maybe we shouldn’t be talking about this,” Sam said.

“Are you saying you haven’t?” Jamie asked, sounding just as shocked as Zoreaux did.

“Alright, you back there, no more sex talk on the club bus,” Coach Lasso said, ending whatever was going to be asked.

“I missed you,” Michael said as he opened the door to greet Colin.

“Me too.” Colin leaned in and kissed Michael. After a long kiss where they fought for control of it before Michael relented. Once the kiss was over, they didn’t break apart.

“I’m sorry about the game.”

“You watched?”

“Got back early thought I’d try it. I do confess I did wander off and make myself a sandwich got distracted and ended up forgetting to close the refrigerator.”

“Again?”

One of the many things Colin liked about Michael is that he wasn’t perfect and didn’t try to be. He was clumsy and a bit forgetful and it was always with food.

“I did catch the end of the game though. I saw the man in front of the net thing, miss catching the ball and they zoomed in on three players looking very sad. Can you guess who one of those players were?”

“Please don’t say me.”

“It was numbers 9, 24 and 12.”

“Damn.”

“It’s alright, brooding looks good on you.”

“Thanks…I think.”

“I was wondering if you would like to meet some of my friends in a very uncomfortable setting.”

Michael looked confused. “What?”

“Every year the club owner throws a charity gala. All the players are invited, and we have a plus one. I was wondering it you would be my plus one.”

Michael went from smiling to frowning. “That’s a pretty big step.”

In all the time that Colin worried about moving things to the next stage in all this, he never actually thought that Michael wouldn’t.

“Oh, yeah, nevermind.”

“Don’t you dare take back my invitation. I was just worried because this would be your official first time in front of people with a man. There will be reporters, right?”

“Maybe not as many as usual since we’re not in the premier league right now but yeah, they’ll be some.”

“If you are comfortable with this, then I’ll be your date.”

“I am. And everyone wants to meet you. I think some of them think I made you up. You know before I met you, I tried to find someone on Bantr, don’t laugh. I was talking to someone, and I thought he really hit it off. But fate came in the form of a chef finding out his sous chef was sleeping with his wife and a fire in the kitchen to stop that. I think maybe that happened so I could meet you. I wouldn’t have been out the night I met you if I wasn’t trying to find something I was missing.”

Michael was staring at him oddly. “Really?”

“Yeah. Don’t worry, I deleted the whole thing and haven’t been on it since.”

“Colin I-

Colin’s phone started ringing. “One second,” he said, holding up his index finger. Michael nodded. Colin stepped away and answered the phone.

“You’re calling late.”

“I was just wondering if you would like to come over?”

Jan Maas’s girlfriend had broken up with him after a very public scene. It was uncomfortable to watch. It hadn’t even been Jan’s fault…completely. Colin had been there just because Isaac had asked him. He was the only one without a date. Jan’s girlfriend had been trying to learn Dutch to impress him. Jan thought he was helping her correct her pronunciation every time she tried to say a word, she took it as a dig. Long story short, Jan ended up with wine poured on his head.

“I’m busy, I told everyone that today.”

“I thought you were lying.”

“I wasn’t. Anyway, just because you and your girl have broken up doesn’t mean we’re starting our arrangement again. I want to find out where it goes with this guy.”

“Are you exclusive?”

“No, but I don’t want to sleep around if I’m dating someone.”

“Okay. Have a good night.”

“Night, Jan.” Once he disconnected, he turned around to find a smiling Michael. “Did you hear that?”

“You are literally five steps away from me. James Bond you are not. Who was that?”

Colin thought about telling him who Jan was but didn’t want to cause any problems or uncomfortableness at the gala.

“Just a friend with benefits that just broke up with his partner.”

“Oh.”

“Ex-friend with benefits. I know we haven’t talked about his and maybe it’s too soon for you, but I was thinking about not dating or sleeping with anyone else.”

“I thought we already were.”

Colin’s eyes widened. “What? But weeks ago you said-

Michael started laughing. “Just kidding. Sure, exclusive sounds way more grown up. Maybe my sister will stop trying to set me up. Before I even met you, they were trying to set me up.”

“They?”

“My sister and my best friend, it was a whole mess.”

“You’re not mad, are you?”

“For you having a life before me? No, I’m good. I’ve only been with three people in my whole life and you’re one of them, but I don’t discriminate.”

Why did that statement make Colin feel dirty?

Chapter Text

The night before was a mistake, not only because she was sure Sassy might actually have feelings for Ted, but sex ruins everything. Rebecca had gotten news that Rupert and Bex had their baby. It was a bad night, the bartender asked who she should call for her. Rebecca chose Ted over Keeley. When Ted was putting her to bed, she leaned up to kiss him. He pulled away but made sure she was comfortable. He then slept on his couch. When she woke up and was sober, she still felt like crap about everything.

What followed was what she could only describe as pity sex from Ted and that made her feel worse. Before she left, she asked him to never mention it again. Ted agreed and she just hoped they both got amnesia for just that.

Colin pulled up to his house and saw a familiar car—his mother’s Bentley, a birthday gift he had given her last year. She had been so happy; it was the first time she had ever had a new car. He had wanted to get her one his first year as a pro, but she refused, saying that he needed his money. Last year, her old car finally broke down, so he was able to convince his dad to put her off getting a new one until her birthday. She had been so happy she cried.

The first thing he noticed as he got out of his car was that she was smoking. She only did that when she was having a bad day. She officially gave up smoking when his grandmother, her mother, got sick.

“Mam? What are you doing here?”

She was standing under the security light, the only reason he saw the tears that she quickly brushed away with the hand holding her cigarette.

“Cariad,” she said, pulling him into a hug. He loved it when she called him that. It made him feel, well… loved.

“What’s wrong?”

The last time she came to see him, he was in a hospital bed.

“I’m so sorry.”

He pulled away from her to look at her more closely. “Sorry for what?”

“I found this in Dylan’s room.” She pulled something out of her pocket and handed it to him, it was a business card. Martin Wallace. The reporter who leaked all those videos, his and Keeley’s included.

“Why would he have his business card?”

“I found a bank statement too. He had a large sum of money put in his account the day before the videos were leaked.”

It made sense now. Colin had wondered how he ended up on anyone’s list to hack. But if his brother sought out Wallace, then it was just lucky timing that the reporter was about to leak other videos and pictures of celebrities. A gay footballer’s sex videos—it had been too much temptation for Wallace to turn down. Not that Dylan knew such videos existed, but Wallace wouldn’t have looked without Dylan. Colin should be surprised that his brother sold him out, but he wasn’t.

“I’m so sorry. For years, I’ve been telling you that it was all in your head, that he was doing these things to you. But seeing it there in black and white… how naïve can I be?”

“It’s not your fault.” Colin didn’t know how to feel about any of this.

“He did steal your trainers when you were thirteen, didn’t he?”

After his team won the championship in his division when he was thirteen, his father had bought him a pair of Nike Dunk SBs. Colin was so blown away by how much his dad cared—he may not be the warmest father, but he showed he cared in other ways. The trainers were the most expensive thing Colin had ever owned at the time. He didn’t want them to get messed up, so he didn’t wear them to school. One day, a week after getting them, he came home to find them gone. His parents wouldn’t have stolen them, so there was only one person who could have—Dylan. He told them that it had to be Dylan, but they didn’t believe him. They said he probably just lost them and was trying to save face by accusing his brother. Two days later, Dylan showed up with a new game system, one he didn’t have the money for before.

“Yeah, he did.”

“And your broken arm?”

“That was him too.” Colin had been eleven then; it didn’t matter to him anymore.

“I’ve kicked him out. I don’t know where he’s going to go, but I can’t have him under my roof anymore. Can you ever forgive me?”

Colin thought about it. At one time in his life, all he wanted was for her to see Dylan for who he was. To see what he did to him. But now, he didn’t care about any of that anymore.

“Of course I do.”

She burst into tears and cried on his shoulder. He held her while she cried, patting her back. After a few minutes, she calmed down.

“Do you want to come in?” he asked her.

She shook her head. “I need to get back; I have work in the morning.”

“That’s a really long drive.”

“I like to drive; it helps me think.” She kissed him on the cheek and started to walk to her car.

“Hey, Mam.”

“Yes?”

“It’s okay with me if you forgive him.”

“And it’s okay with me if you don’t.”

Later that night, as Colin lay in bed, he thought about his mother’s apology. Michael had come over, and they had gone out to eat and returned for the night.

“How do you feel now that she’s apologized?” Michael asked, turning over on his stomach and running his hand down Colin’s face. Colin leaned into the caress. Michael had soft hands, except for the side of his index finger from holding a pencil and drawing for hours for work. Michael said he was old school; he liked to do it by hand before working it out on the computer.

“I don’t know. I guess I thought if she ever did, I would feel… vindicated or something. But I just feel… sad.”

“It’s okay to be sad, but don’t let him hurt you any more than he already has. Your parents know what he is now, so be prepared for him to try to get you to give him money again.”

“I hope not. Can we talk about something else?”

“I got my suit for the gala, did I tell you?”

Colin turned over to his side so he could look at Michael. “Really?”

“Yep, I’m nervous about meeting your friends. I decided to watch a few interviews with the players to see what they were like.”

“What did you think?”

“You said Isaac is your best mate?”

“Yeah.”

“He looks scary.”

“He’s not—well, to people he likes, he’s not. Anyone else?”

“Sam seems nice.”

“He is.”

“And Dani too.”

“Dani is like a giant puppy.”

“You said he was the one who helped you pick out your car, right?”

“Yeah.”

“Tell me some more about all of them.”

Colin sighed and leaned back on his pillow. “Well, like I said, Isaac is loyal. Sam is too nice sometimes. Dani is very excitable. Zoreaux will ask you inappropriate questions, but he doesn’t mean any harm. Don’t listen to anything Bumbercatch tells you, and for sure don’t go anywhere with him. You’ll end up in handcuffs, and not the fun way.” Michael laughed, causing Colin to smile.

“What about Jamie? He seems… full of himself.”

“Oh, he is. But he’s an amazing player and has worked hard to be a better person. I can’t think of anyone else being our star strikers other than Dani and Jamie.”

Ted was getting ready for the gala. This year, he had asked Sassy, but she turned him down flat. So instead, he was flying solo since Nate had his own invitation this year as an assistant coach. Thankfully, things between him and Rebecca weren’t awkward, they loved each other just not in that way. He guessed that was one way to make sure.

Someone knocked on his door, startling him. He wasn’t expecting anyone today. He felt lighter than he had in a while, telling Dr. Sharon about his father. It was something that had eaten away at him, and now she was helping him face it. Not that he was doing too well in that department, but he was trying.

He only had his dress pants and undershirt on when he answered the door. When he saw who it was, he almost fainted.

“Michelle?” He couldn’t believe his eyes. “What are you doing here?”

“Can I come in? We need to talk.”

“Sure, come in, come in,” he said, moving out of the way. He looked behind her but didn’t see Henry.

“I left Henry with my mother in Kansas.”

“Oh,” he said, disappointedly.

“I wanted to talk to you alone. I’ve been here for a few days. Henry isn’t doing well with the divorce, and I’ve decided to make a big decision. I’ve gotten help from Rebecca but asked her not to tell you until I was sure of what I was doing.”

Ted was having trouble following her rambling. “Okay.”

“I got a job here as headteacher of the Brightwater School here in Richmond.”

“Are you kidding me?”

“No. My work visa has been approved, and Henry and I will be moving over before the start of the next school year.”

Ted used his fingers to count. It was February now, so that meant she would be back in five months or so, and he would be able to see his son.

“Why are you doing this?” He didn’t understand.

“Everyone needs a little adventure in their lives.” She paused. “I had to make the decision—did I want to be right, or did I want my son to be happy? It’s a choice I would make any time. Anyway, it’s not like this is forever. I know you want to get promoted, then to win the Premier League Cup. I want Henry to be able to see that, to cheer you on in person.”

“I don’t deserve this, but I’ll take it.”

“We’re still a family.”

“That we are. I can call Rebecca to see if I can get you a seat at the banquet tonight.”

“Already taken care of, I’m going to get ready now. I’ll meet you there?”

“Yeah, yeah. Thank you, Michelle. Truly, thank you.”

“You gave me the space I needed, and I thank you. But now it’s only about Henry, and he doesn’t need space; he needs his father.”

“And I need him.”

“You look so fit,” Colin said as he picked up Michael.

“Same to you.” Michael raised an eyebrow. “You know you’re not driving, right?”

“Coward.”

“I know you can handle this car much better, but babe, you are a terrible driver.”

“You called me babe.” It was all Colin heard.

“Don’t let it inflate your ego; footballers don’t need any help there.”

“If you’re asked anything you don’t want to answer by the paparazzi, just ignore them, or if they won’t leave you alone, say ‘no comment.’ If we keep the momentum we have now, we’ll get promoted at the end of the season. So, there will probably be more paparazzi than if we were doing badly.”

“This is going to be strange. I never thought I’d have my picture taken by paparazzi.”

“It loses its strangeness and becomes normal after a while.”

“How sad.”

“Yeah. Come on, fine, you can drive—that means I get to drink tonight.”

“Like you weren’t already going to do that.”

Isaac got out of the limo first, then held out his arm for Helen. He went all out for their date tonight. He wanted her to be happy and feel like a princess. Something had happened a week ago that made her sad, but she wouldn’t talk about it. So, he wanted to get her to smile; it would be a win if he could do that.

Colin could usually get anybody to laugh, most of the time not on purpose.

“I’m nervous to meet your teammates.”

“Nah, not my teammates, just my mates.”

She blushed. “Of course, sorry.”

“It’s okay. At least you know Colin already.” She shifted uncomfortably. “What?”

“It’s nothing.”

“It’s clearly something. What?”

“I can’t explain it, but there’s something about him that is… off.”

“What does that mean… off? Colin’s great.”

“Joe is really good at reading people, and he seemed to think that Colin is hiding something.”

Before he could ask any more about that, they made it to the red carpet for the pictures to be taken. Ms. Welton’s charity gala was a huge deal.

“Get ready for your picture to be taken,” Isaac said to her before the cameramen started calling his name to look at them.

Colin stepped out of the car, feeling the buzz of excitement in the air as he approached the red carpet. Michael was by his side, looking effortlessly dashing in his tailored suit. Colin couldn’t help but smile as the cameras started flashing, capturing their every move. This was Michael’s first real exposure to the paparazzi, and Colin was keen to make sure he felt comfortable. The cameras seemed to go wild when they saw them. A lot of inappropriate questions were asked, but Michael was ignoring them like a champ.

As they walked down the carpet, Colin noticed Isaac ahead, arm-in-arm with his date, Helen. He waved to Isaac, who grinned and waved back, before they both focused on the photographers calling out their names.

“Isaac! Colin! Over here!”

The flashes continued, but Colin’s attention was pulled away when Michael suddenly stiffened beside him. He glanced over, concerned.

“What’s wrong?” Colin asked, leaning closer to Michael.

Michael’s eyes were fixed ahead, and Colin followed his gaze to Helen. She looked just as shocked as Michael.

“Helen?” Michael called out, his voice tinged with disbelief.

Helen’s eyes widened in recognition, and she hurried over, leaving Isaac momentarily confused. She stopped in front of Michael.

“Michael? What are you doing here?” Helen demanded, her tone sharp.

Colin blinked, completely caught off guard. “Wait, you two know each other?”

Helen ignored Colin’s question, her focus entirely on Michael. “You’re dating a footballer? After everything you’ve said about them?”

Michael looked equally surprised. “You’re dating a footballer? You’ve always said they were thick as pig shit, and you’d never waste your time on one!”

Isaac, now beside Colin, looked between the two of them. “Hold on, you two are…?”

“Siblings,” Michael and Helen said in unison.

Colin’s eyes widened. “What?”

Helen turned to Colin, her expression hardening. “I didn’t know it was you he was seeing.”

Isaac, sensing the tension, put a hand on Colin’s shoulder. “Mate, maybe we should—”

Helen sighed, her posture deflating. “Michael, you’ve been so secretive lately. Mum and Dad think you’ve fallen back into old habits—drugs, booze… and now, finding out you’re dating a footballer? What are you doing?”

Michael took a deep breath, clearly trying to keep his temper in check. “I would think you’d be happy that I’m just dating Colin, then.”

“We need to get off the carpet and inside,” Colin said.

“Why?” Helen demanded.

“Because this is still our job, and all of this isn’t good PR. Come on,” Isaac said.

The group of four made it inside without any more issues. They were seated at a table with Richard, his date, Jan Maas, and his date. There were two more empty seats at their table, reserved for Bumbercatch and his date.

“But Colin, of all people? After everything that’s happened with those videos… don’t you realize how this could affect your career?” Helen asked, concern evident in her voice.

Colin winced at the mention of the videos. He knew they were still a sore point for a lot of people, especially with how public the whole ordeal had been. He opened his mouth to speak, but Michael beat him to it.

“Colin’s been nothing but supportive,” Michael said firmly. “And my career is my business. I’m not going to let what other people think dictate who I can or can’t be with.”

Helen seemed to soften slightly, but she still looked concerned. “I’m just worried about you, Michael. I don’t want you to get hurt.”

Michael reached out and took her hand, his voice softening. “I know you are, but I’m happy with Colin.”

Helen looked at her brother for a long moment, then sighed deeply. “I just don’t want you to regret this.”

“I won’t,” Michael said confidently, giving her hand a squeeze.

After a moment, Colin and Isaac stood up and excused themselves to greet their coaches and Ms. Welton, leaving Michael and Helen alone.

The moment Colin and Isaac were out of earshot, Helen turned to Michael. “You need to end this before it gets worse.”

Michael frowned. “What do you mean ‘before it gets worse’?”

“Look, I know you like him, but those videos… they’re not going to just go away. People talk, and being associated with something like that could damage your reputation. You’ve worked too hard to throw it all away now,” Helen said, her tone pleading.

Michael shook his head. “I’m not ending things with Colin just because of some stupid videos. He didn’t do anything wrong.”

“But the media won’t care about that,” Helen insisted. “You’re an architect, Michael. You have clients, and they might not be as understanding.”

Michael sighed, running a hand through his short hair. “I get that you’re trying to protect me, but I’m not a kid anymore. I can handle this.”

“I just don’t want you to lose everything you’ve built.”

Michael leaned back in his chair. “I won’t. Colin’s a good person, and I’m not going to let the past dictate my future.”

Helen looked like she wanted to say more, but at that moment, Colin and Isaac returned to the table, their faces lit up with smiles.

“Hey, what’s going on?” Colin asked.

Michael forced a smile, not wanting to ruin the evening. “Nothing, just catching up.”

Everything seemed to settle, and for that, Colin was grateful. But then the player auction started. Every year at the gala, the players were auctioned off for a date. For the last two years, it had been the same woman who won a date with Colin. She was a nice older lady who said that he reminded her of her late husband. He was never sure if she meant gay or Welsh. Since at the time he was still in the closet, he decided not to ask.

Jamie was the first auctioned off. The old cougar who won Roy last year bid and won Jamie for six thousand. Dani went to a pair of middle-aged sisters for seven thousand. Isaac went for a decent five thousand to the ex-wife of a former member of Parliament. Colin was the last to be auctioned off, and he felt a bit nervous. The older woman who usually bid on him wasn’t there this year.

“Do you really have to do this?” Michael asked as he stood up.

“It’s actually in our contracts,” Colin said, leaning over to kiss Michael on the cheek. He then buttoned his suit jacket and walked up to the stage. Last year, Rupert had done the auction, but Colin was glad he wasn’t there this time, and that Ms. Welton was handling it instead.

“We’ll start the bidding at one thousand pounds.”

It took a few moments, but finally, someone placed a bid. It was a woman, someone Colin had never seen before. He breathed a sigh of relief—she probably just wanted to go out for a drink or something simple.

“I have one thousand pounds, do I hear two thousand?”

Colin noticed a man in the back put in a bid for two thousand, but he didn’t recognize him either. It was odd; men rarely bid on the players.

“Two thousand pounds, do I hear three thousand?”

The woman in the front raised the bid to five thousand. This was getting strange—his price usually never went over three thousand.

“Five thousand pounds, do I hear six thousand?”

The man in the back quickly upped the bid to six thousand. Colin glanced at Michael, who looked back at the man, then at Colin, gesturing as if to ask who the hell this man was. Colin shook his head—he had no idea.

“Six thousand pounds, do I hear seven thousand?”

The woman didn’t bid again. Colin could tell that Michael was getting angry. After two more calls, the man in the back won the bid. Colin studied him. He guessed the man was in his fifties but looked like he took care of himself. Colin suspected he was probably a reporter, using this as a chance to get an exclusive. Six thousand pounds for an exclusive was actually quite a deal on the reporter’s part.

By the time Colin returned to the table, dinner was being served. He noticed that Jan Maas and Michael were arguing.

“What’s going on?” he asked as he sat down.

“Nothing,” Michael replied through clenched teeth.

“I was just saying that now you’re out, you’ll have disgusting old men coming onto you like that, and that Michael should get used to it,” Jan said.

While what Jan said was true—it had already started to happen—there seemed to be a note of malice in his tone.

Isaac, being his best mate, quickly changed the subject. “Have you ever eaten moose testicles?”

The table broke into laughter as they listened to a disgusting story about Bumbercatch’s prep school initiation.

Chapter Text

His mother called every Tuesday to check on him, it was nice. Michael and he had broken up just a week after the charity gala. Seemed he was able to tell his sister to fuck off but when it was their parents and her, Colin was an expense he couldn’t afford. Colin got it, he really did. Picking someone you dated for a month over your family, no choice there.

Isaac had broken up with Helen after the whole ordeal. It made Colin feel bad, but Isaac said it wasn’t his fault. Since then, they both had been clubbing every night and hooking up with anyone that caught their fancy. Since they were both nursing a broken heart, they egged each other on to hook up and it worked. Colin played Isaac’s wingman much like he used to, but this time Isaac played his to men instead of women that Colin wasn’t interested in. It was hilarious watching Isaac hype him up to men.

He still missed Michael, he had really fallen for him in such a short time.

“Are you alright?” Ted asked as he sat down her biscuits.

Rebecca felt like death, she had been sick all morning. Looking at the box, knowing what was in it made her stomach roll. She leapt up and ran to her en suite, just making it in time. Soon Ted was there behind her, holding her hair back. He was gently rubbing her back. After what felt like forever, she had nothing more to throw up.

Standing up, she walked to the sink and cleaned up.

“Thank you, Ted,” she said, her voice raw.

“Maybe you should go home if you’re sick,” he said. He must be really worried because there were no cute nicknames or puns.

“I have too many things to do. If it’s like yesterday it will wear off.”

Ted laughed. “That reminds me of when Michelle was pregnant.”

As soon as he said it, it was like the word hung in the air between them.

She shook her head, it was impossible she was perimenopausal. Well, she guessed maybe not impossible, but she had only had sex with one person in the last few months and she was looking at him.

“No,” she said.

“Do you want me to get you a test?” He looked just as shocked.

“You have training.” Their last game was in two days. The game that would decide if they get promoted or not.

“Richard has a few in his locker.”

“Why does Richard have pregnancy tests in his locker?”

“I didn’t ask, I thought it was better that way.”

“I don’t want anyone to know I’m taking a test. I know I’m not pregnant but still.”

“No one will know.” He left with a promise to be right back. Leslie was running late so it was just her and her thoughts.

She had always wanted a child, but Rupert hadn’t wanted one. She had convinced herself as long as she had Rupert that it was worth it to give up her dream. That was until she couldn’t deny his affairs anymore and divorced him. It didn’t matter he cheated on her constantly, she ended the marriage so of course she was the bad guy to the media.

Repeating in her head that there was no way she was pregnant. Even as she told herself that she felt a twinge of hope.

“No, stop it, you’ll just be disappointed,” she told herself. Someone knocked on her door. “Come in, Ted.”

But it wasn’t Ted, it was Colin.

“Hello, Ms. Welton, sorry to disturb you I was just wanting to ask something.”

She sat up straight, her stomach rolling some. “Of course, Colin. What is it you would like to discuss?”

“My contract is up at the end of this season.”

“Colin, we should really be having this discussion with your agent here.”

He shook his head. “I’m not trying to negotiate anything. On my last contract if anything happened to me the payout would go to my parents and brother, split three ways. I want to remove my brother.”

Colin had already gotten his letter of intent to keep him on the team. Only two other players’ contracts were up this year, and she had already worked out their new contracts with them and their agents. In truth she had been putting off Colin’s because of the new stipulation in his contract, one she knew wouldn’t go over well when he found out.

“I’ll make a note of that and have him removed from your contract. I’ll contact your agent about negotiations.” It was just a part of the game.

“Yes, thank you.”

“Colin?” she asked as he turned away. She wanted to give him a warning about what he would be seeing in his contract but she was too much of a coward.

“Yeah?”

She shook her head. “Nothing, have a good day.”

As he was leaving, Ted rushed back in almost running over Colin.

“Sorry Gaffer,” Colin apologized as he left even though it wasn’t his fault. Of course, Ted said the same and apologized.

“Okay, I got it, boss,” Ted said holding up a bag.

“This is a waste of time,” she told him.

“It’ll clear your mind, I see you’re thinking about it.”

“Fine.” She grabbed the bag and went into the en suite.

She’s peed on quite a few pregnancy tests in her life. The first one was only 19, and praying it was negative. The same could be said until she got married to Rupert. There were four times she was late during their 12 years of marriage. Every one of the times she wished for her not to be pregnant because she worried Rupert would leave her. Now she was glad she didn’t have a child tying her to him, but it made her so angry that she wasted her dreams on a man who didn’t give a damn about her or her feelings.

Taking the test out of the box, she opened the shiny container that held the test to keep it protected.

A minute later she started her wait of five minutes. It had been six weeks since she slept with Ted. But since she was perimenopausal her periods weren’t regular and hadn’t had one in a few months before that.

If she were being honest with herself, she couldn’t think of a better person to have a baby with than Ted. But there was nothing between them than of friendship. It was a very strong love she had for him but very platonic. Then there was the whole Sassy issue. Sassy would never forgive her.

“How’s it going in there?” Ted said through the door.

She shook herself out of her thoughts and looked at the test. Two pink lines when every other time she had taken the test there was one pink line.

An hour and five more tests later, the result was still the same. After getting the first positive result she had convinced herself that Richard had trick tests for some reason.

“What are we going to do?” she asked Ted.

“That’s up to you. I’m behind you with whatever you chose.”

“I really want this baby,” she said honestly.

“Then we’re having a baby.”

Chapter Text

Colin usually never got a hangover, but the celebration after being promoted had been wild. He’d passed out on the floor at Richard’s house. He didn’t even remember how he got there, but most of the team was still asleep when he woke up. The Uber arrived before anyone besides Sam was awake. Sam had taken it upon himself to make food and coffee to rouse the team.

Now, Colin was at his agent Clint’s office. Clint was pretty hands-off, which suited Colin just fine. He was surprised he hadn’t heard anything from Clint when the video scandal and his sexuality went public.

“Ms. Welton sent me a copy of the contract,” Clint began. “I assume you got yours to read over?”

Colin nodded. “Yeah, I skimmed it,” he lied. He hadn’t even taken it out of the envelope.

Clint raised an eyebrow, clearly unconvinced. “Uh-huh. Look, Colin, I wish you would’ve read it. There’s something new in there that I’m not sure you’ll agree to.”

“Ms. Welton wouldn’t put anything bad in there. I’m sure it’s fine,” Colin replied, trying to brush it off. He liked Rebecca a lot; she’d been understanding when the video was released and knew it wasn’t his fault.

“It’s not necessarily bad,” Clint said, “but as your agent, I wouldn’t advise signing this contract without making some changes.”

“Why not?” Colin asked, suddenly feeling uneasy.

Clint flipped open his copy of the contract to page four and handed it to Colin. “Start at the second paragraph.”

Colin read the section, feeling like he’d been punched in the gut. “They can’t be serious,” he said numbly.

“They are, but it’s just legal trying to cover themselves. We can negotiate to have it removed.”

It wasn’t just the legal aspect that bothered Colin; it was that Ms. Welton and Higgins had approved it in the first place.

“I need some time to think about it,” Colin said, handing the contract back.

“That’s fine, but if you decide not to sign, I’ve had some interest from Hull City.”

“We just got promoted,” Colin said, incredulously. “Why would I leave a Premier League club for one in a lower division? I stuck by AFC Richmond because I believed we could do it, and we did. I don’t want to go to a club with less pay and no real chance of being promoted.”

“I’m just giving you the information I have. I can put some feelers out for other Premier League clubs, but I’ll be honest—you’d probably be second team.”

“So, you’re saying I should sign?”

“No, this contract is unfair, and you know it. They wouldn’t ask this of any of their straight players.”

“But Ms. Welton isn’t like that.”

“If you believe in her, push back. Don’t sign until it’s removed, and remember, I’ve got your back.”

Colin nodded. “Tell them I’m not signing with that clause in there. And make sure they know that if it stays and I’m no longer under contract, I’ll make sure the press knows why.”

“Got it. Be prepared for an angry call to the clubhouse.”

“My contract ended; I’m not under any new one right now. They can ask nicely, and I might show up.”

“Good lad.”

Rebecca sighed loudly after getting off the phone with Colin Hughes’ agent. She’d known as soon as legal wanted that clause in the contract that Colin wouldn’t sign. She hadn’t wanted it in there either, but she had to listen to her legal team. Now that Colin had refused, she could work on getting it removed. Even though she had complete ownership of the club, she couldn’t afford to appear weak.

There was a knock on her door, and Higgins stuck his head in.

“Yes, Leslie?”

“I just got a very angry call from Colin Hughes. He’s threatening not to re-sign if the clause stays in the contract.”

“Yes, I just heard. Did we make a mistake letting legal put that in?”

“Yes. I think we were the bad guys here. When Richard got caught up in that scandal with the supermodel a few years ago, we didn’t put anything like this in his contract.”

“I wasn’t the owner then,” Rebecca said, trying to justify the situation.

“Not solely. But we let Jamie come back after being seen on reality TV, cheating on one girl with another, without any kind of clause in his contract. We owe Colin an apology and hope he accepts it.”

Rebecca glanced at the clock. “I’ve got to go. I have an appointment.”

“What kind of appointment?”

“The kind that isn’t your business.”

“Right, right.”

Her appointment was with her doctor to confirm her pregnancy. She was worried it might be a false alarm or something worse. She hadn’t told Keeley or Sassy yet. Sassy would want to know who the father was, and Rebecca feared it could ruin their friendship. Both Keeley and Sassy knew how much she wanted children, so she didn’t want to tell them until she was sure.

At the doctor’s office, they handed her a cup to pee in and took some blood. Now she was waiting for the doctor.

“Ms. Welton?”

“Yes?”

“The urine test came back positive. It will take a few days for the blood test to come back. Based on the date you think you conceived, you’re about seven weeks along. Usually, we wait a bit longer for an ultrasound, but given your age, we’ll do a transvaginal ultrasound today.”

Rebecca had been with Sassy for a few of her ultrasounds with Nora. She knew what a heartbeat sounded like, and she didn’t hear one. The doctor moved the probe slightly, and then—

“Is that?” Rebecca asked, her voice trembling.

“Yes, ma’am.” The doctor turned the screen toward her. “That’s a healthy heartbeat of a seven-week-old fetus. Congratulations.”

“That’s presumptuous,” Rebecca muttered.

“If you’d like to discuss your options—”

“No!” she said quickly, then softer, “No, this baby is very much wanted.”

“Okay. I’ll leave the room so you can get cleaned up. There are wipes here,” the doctor said, pointing to some wet wipes. “After you’re dressed, come back to the waiting room, and we’ll set up your next appointment. Would you like a picture of the scan?”

“Yes, please.”

Colin read through the revised contract twice. The clause was gone, and it was just like his last contract. Ms. Welton and Higgins had both apologized for the clause, but it still hurt. The clause had stated that he wasn’t allowed to have any videos or pictures taken of him in his private life. The fact that they wanted all the bases covered felt like a betrayal.

His private life was just that—private. It wasn’t fair. Both Jamie and Richard had sex scandals, and they didn’t have this in their contracts. He should be happy with the new contract, but it didn’t make him feel better.

“Why don’t you just sign it?” Isaac asked.

“I feel betrayed. It’s hard to explain. We’re a family here at AFC Richmond, and that contract made me feel like I wasn’t wanted.”

“That’s not what it meant. Demand more money.”

“It’s not about the money; it’s about what’s right.”

“It’s football; nothing’s right.”

“Yeah, I know,” Colin said sadly.

“Do you want to go out tonight? Have some fun?”

“No, I’m just going to stay home.”

Colin eventually signed the contract and decided to take it to Rebecca himself. He wanted to talk to her in person. When he knocked on her office door, there was no answer. He knocked again—still nothing. Knowing she was there, he opened the door.

Rebecca was on the ground, not moving.

“Fuck, fuck, fuck,” he muttered as he rushed to her side. He started to call 999, but then he saw she was breathing. He shook her arm gently, and her eyes fluttered open.

“Oh, Colin. What are you doing here?”

“What happened?”

“I just got dizzy and fell.”

“Let me help you up.”

He helped her to her chair. She looked flushed, with a few tears in her eyes.

“Are you alright?”

“Yes, yes. I’ve been having dizzy spells all day.”

“It’s the heat. Maybe you should go home.”

She nodded. “You’re right.”

“Can I walk you to your car?”

“That would be lovely.”

They were silent as they walked down the hall. They waited for the lift in silence, but Colin couldn’t hold his question any longer.

“Can I ask you something?” he asked, holding onto her in case she fell again.

“Yes,” she croaked.

“Why the clause?”

She leaned her head against the wall. “I didn’t want it in there. I listened to someone I shouldn’t have and made Leslie go along with it. I’m sorry, Colin. I hope with time you can forgive me.”

“I forgive you.”

“Just like that?”

“You didn’t fight to keep it in when I said no. I don’t like it, and I won’t forget it, but I will forgive you.”

“That’s all I can ask,” she said, swaying a little.

“Are you alright?” he asked, concerned.

“I just feel sick. I’m sure it’s nothing.”

“I can drive you home if you need.”

“No!” she said sharply, then softer, “No, my driver is here.”

“I’m actually a good driver,” he said, not needing to mention that was a little white lie.

Chapter Text

Sassy had been reaching out for over a month. Rebecca wanted to tell her about the baby, after all she and Keeley were her best friends. She hadn’t told anyone about the baby besides Ted. In her mind she thought as soon as she told anyone she would lose it. Then she decided to start to tell people in her second trimester, but Sassy was getting worried, she knew.

After a while though it occurred to her that Sassy might be thinking she was ghosting her again. So, she invited her over for the weekend. She hoped that it wouldn’t be the end of their friendship. They never were attracted to the same kind of men, so this was a new territory for them. Not that she was attracted to Ted, he was one of her three best friends. But now this little being was growing inside of her, she couldn’t feel bad about it. Ted seemed to be excited too. Not only was Michelle bringing Henry over to live for a few years, but the baby was on its way…hopefully.

Ted had told Michelle before she officially accepted the deal, he didn’t want her to feel like he was lying or keeping things from her. That was Ted, the most truthful and good person she knew.

“Stinky,” Sassy said as Rebecca opened the door and let her best friend in.

“Sassy, I’m so glad you could come.”

“Why wouldn’t I?” She turned towards the open door. “Come on Nora.”

Rebecca’s heart dropped, she didn’t want Nora there when she broke the news to Sassy.

“I didn’t know you were bringing Nora.”

“Of course I did. Come on let have a drink.” That’s when she noticed Ted. “What are you doing here?”

“Sassy, we have something to tell you,” Rebecca said uncomfortably.

Nora must have noticed the unease from Rebecca because she backed out of the room and shut the door behind her, leaving just the three of them.

“What?”

Rebecca took a deep breath, her nerves on edge as she glanced at Ted, who just smiled. She knew this moment was coming, but it didn’t make it any easier. Rip the band aid off. Just do it.

“Sassy, before we do anything else, there’s something we need to tell you,” Rebecca began, her voice a bit shaky.

Sassy’s eyes darted between them, her usual playful smirk replaced by a look of concern. “What’s going on? You two look like you’re about to tell me something serious.”

“It is serious,” Ted said.

“I’m pregnant. Ted and I…well, it just happened, and I-and I really want this baby.”

For a moment, there was silence. Sassy blinked, processing the information. Then, to Rebecca’s relief, a wide grin splashed across her face.

“Oh my God, Stinky! You’re having a baby? This is amazing!” Sassy pulled Rebecca into a tight hug. “I’m so happy for you!”

Rebecca let out a breath she didn’t realize she was holding, feeling a weight lift off her shoulders. “You’re…you’re not upset?”

“Upset? Are you kidding me?” Sassy pulled back, holding Rebecca’s shoulders as she looked at her. “This is the best news ever! And Ted, don’t you dare feel weird about it. But,” she added with a teasing wink, “maybe we should stop sleeping together. It’d be a little too… ‘Jeremy Kyle’ with the baby on the way, don’t you think?”

Ted chuckled, his relief evident. “I don’t know who that is but yeah, that might be for the best. I’m really glad you’re okay with this.”

“Okay with it? I’m more than okay with it! I’m excited!” Sassy exclaimed. She turned back to Rebecca, her smile never fading. “You’ve always wanted this, and now it’s happening. And you’ve got the best co-parent in the world to help you.”

Rebecca finally was able to cry, not with sadness but of joy and acceptance. “Thank you, Sassy. That means the world to me.”

“Now, let’s get to the fun part,” Sassy said, rubbing her hands together. “What are we gonna name this little nugget?”

Ted’s face lit up with enthusiasm. “Oh, I’ve got a list started already! What do you think of ‘Pearl’ for a girl? Or maybe ‘Huckleberry’ for a boy?”

Rebecca burst into laughter. “Ted, please tell me you’re not serious.”

“Hey, I think Pearl’s cute!” Ted defended with a grin. “And Huckleberry, well, it’s got a lot of character!”

Sassy joined in the laughter. “I love it! But how about something a bit more… unconventional? Like ‘Zanzibar’ for a boy. Or ‘Moonchild’ for a girl. Really make them stand out, you know?”

Rebecca shook her head, still laughing. “Absolutely not, Sassy. But I appreciate the creativity.”

“Oh, come on, Rebecca! You know it’d be memorable.

Ted leaned in, his voice dropping to a whisper. “I dunno, Zanzibar Lasso does have a nice ring to it…”

Rebecca swatted him playfully. “Zanzibar Welton,” Rebecca corrected.

Instead of being upset or put out. Ted’s smile grew wider. “Zanzibar it is.”

Rebecca lightly smacked him on the shoulder. She should have known he was trying to play. She was happy he wasn’t one of those men that had to have any child from their DNA have their last night.

Then Rebecca turned to Sassy. “Thank you, Sassy. I’m so lucky to have you in my life.”

Sassy winked. “You better believe it, Stinky. Now, how about we celebrate with some non-alcoholic bubbly. You never know ‘Zanzibar’ might grow on you.”

Nora must have been listening at the door because she picked that moment to run in, jumping up and down about the baby. It was a good day.

Colin couldn’t believe he activated his Bantr account again. Thankfully, it saves your email and if you come back, you get your full account back. He wasn’t on it for more than two days before he got a message from a familiar name. Moreorless.

Moreorless- Looks like you came back from the dead.

12of22- I guess so. I just got out of a very brief relationship.

Moreorless- Me too. What happened with yours?

12of22- I wasn’t what his family wanted for him, and he chose them over me.

There was a long break in messages. Colin started wondering if Moreorless didn’t like that answer. Then three dots appeared, then disappeared, appeared again.

Moreorless- What do you do for a living? I don’t think you ever told me.

He didn’t really want to tell anyone he didn’t know what he did. Maybe if they met in person but not on a dating app.

12of22- I’m in sports, can we just leave it at that?

Moreorless-Yeah. I think I know what I needed to anyway. So, how was your day?

They chatted for a while, but Colin had to head back to the clubhouse. This was the first day of training, they were going to see how the new recruits did. It had been a great week. He thought maybe he was finally over Michael and all that. His mother was calling him daily, which was a little much, but she was always happy to talk to him. He was just happy, he hadn’t been this happy in a long time. So of course something needed to bring him down.

As they were getting dressed and joking with one another, Nate came into the room.

“Colin, can we speak to you in here for a moment?”

When Colin entered the office, he saw Ted, Roy, and Coach Beard already there, waiting for him. His mood took a nosedive.

“Take a seat, Colin,” Ted said, gesturing to a chair across from them.

Colin sat down, glancing around at the coaches. “What’s going on?” he asked, trying to keep calm.

Ted exchanged a look with Roy before speaking. “Colin, we’ve got a bit of a situation, and we wanted to talk to you about it directly.”

Roy leaned forward. “Norwich City’s in a tough spot right now. Their starting left winger got injured during pre-season, and their second string… well, he just doesn’t have the experience they need. They didn’t have the money to bring in the top players during the transfer window, and they’re struggling to find someone who can step up.”

Colin listened, a knot forming in his stomach. He could see where this was going.

“They’ve reached out to us,” Ted continued. “They’re looking for a player who’s not just experienced but also a team player—someone who can fit into their squad and work hard. And Colin, they specifically asked for you.”

Colin blinked in surprise. “Me? But… why not Fischer? He’s younger, he’s got potential.” And he’s brand new, he doesn’t have the attachment to Richmond that Colin had. Hell, he was renting out a flat, Colin owned a home here.

Coach Beard chimed in. “Fischer’s got potential, sure, but he doesn’t have your experience. Norwich needs someone who knows how to play at this level, someone who can handle the pressure of the Premier League right from the start. They don’t have time for someone to grow into the role. They need someone who’s ready now. They’ve been bouncing back and forth with being relegated and promoted. They don’t want to be relegated again. They need help and that’s you, Colin.”

Roy nodded in agreement. “They need a left winger who can do the job without issue, who can help them stay in the Premier League. You’re that guy, Colin. Fischer’s not ready for that responsibility yet.”

“But we just got promoted too. Don’t you need me and my experience?”

“We can afford to lose you,” Nate said.

The other coaches looked at Nate with distaste.

Colin processed what they were saying. On one hand, he was flattered that Norwich saw him as the solution to their problem. On the other hand, he felt a pang of disappointment at the idea of leaving Richmond, even temporarily.

“What happens if I go?” Colin asked, his voice quieter now. “What happens to my spot here?”

Ted smiled. “If you choose to go, Colin, your spot here is safe. We’re not pushing you out. We’re giving you an opportunity. When the loan period ends, you’ll have your place in the squad. No question about it.”

Colin sat there in silence thinking over his options. He could refuse the loan and that would be the end of it. But he would almost make a name for himself as not to be dealt with. He didn’t want other teams thinking he wasn’t a team player. While Richmond was his home now, whose to say what tomorrow will bring.

“I appreciate you guys being upfront with me,” Colin said after a moment. “I’ll do it. I’ll go to Norwich and give it everything I’ve got. But when I come back, I want to be back in this team. I want MY spot back on the team.” Fischer would have to go back to second team.

Ted nodded. “That’s the spirit, Colin. Think of this as an adventure.” Colin had to bit down that when Man City canceled Jamie’s loan, he didn’t think it was an adventure.

Roy gave a rare, approving nod. “You’re making the right call. Go out there and show them what you’ve got.”

Colin stood up. “Thanks, coaches. I won’t let you down.”

As they left the office, Nate grabbed him. “Don’t give your brother your new address when you get a place there.”

“What?”

“Colin, I did some digging. Your brother is more dangerous than you think. He wants money and he’ll do anything he has to, to get it.”

“He wouldn’t hurt me. Not like you’re thinking.”

“Listen to me. Use this opportunity to stay off his radar.”

“Did you give my name to Norwich?”

“I knew they were looking for someone and you fit the bill. I am really sorry about what I said last season.”

“I know, boyo,” Colin said, before hugging Nate. He was a hugger, sue him.