Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

The holidays have finally arrived. You enjoyed your studies, but for the past few weeks you had been looking forward to almost three months of vacation. You planned to go to visit your friend who moved to Martinaise a few years ago. Neha, like you, worked in the art industry, although her area of interest was quite different - while she was a novelty dicemaker, you did painting. Both of you came to the conclusion that it would do you good to go somewhere quiet to find inspiration. Besides, you needed a break from the crowded city, and Martinaise was perfect for that. Unfortunately, the girl couldn't take you under her roof. Her workplace, and at the same time her apartment, was located inside the chimney of an old central furnace, and there was no option for you both to fit in there.

That's how you ended up at Whirling-in-Rags, a hostel located right next to your friend's studio. To your surprise, the manager of this establishment offered you to rent the largest suite, at an extremely tempting price. When you asked him why he wasn't taking more money for it, he finally admitted to you that a few months earlier a man had been shot in that room, so now no one wants to live in it. In response, you just shrugged your shoulders. You didn't care if someone died here, the most important thing was that you had a place to sleep, in addition for such a small fee.

After unpacking at your new place, you set off to greet Neha. It was good to see her again after such a long time, you had so much to tell each other. When you mentioned to her the story you had heard about your hostel room, she looked at you in horror and commented:

-You can't sleep there! The place is haunted!

You laughed nervously. What if Neha was right? After all, the manager also mentioned something about it. But before you had time to answer, your friend burst out laughing:

-Oh, don't be silly, there's nothing there. It's just a room, and at a good price. The perpetrator of this murder was caught a long time ago. Actually, it's quite an interesting story, if you want, I can tell you....

Outside, dusk was slowly falling as you left Neha's apartment. You decided that before you went to bed you could go for a walk, look for some good place to paint. You remembered that the girl had mentioned something about the other, much quieter part of town, located behind the dam. That sounded like a good place to start.

As you walked across the concrete bridge, you momentarily felt as if you had been transported to another world. Your friend was right, this place was a veritable oasis of calm. Everything was so quiet here, in addition, the sky just at that moment shone with the last rays of the sun, giving the whole setting a truly magical atmosphere.

You enjoyed the moment for a few minutes, but finally moved north, wanting to explore the rest of the waterfront. You believed that somewhere here was an old Dolorian church that you had to see with your own eyes.

The church was indeed there, as picturesque as it could be. What surprised you was the fact that colorful, harsh light was seeping from the windows of the building, and you could feel the rumbling of bass all around. "It's probably some kind of rave." - you thought and sat down against the wall of the dilapidated factory so that you could observe the church. In your head, you had already started planning what painting technique you would use to depict the scene in front of you.

Then you saw a figure emerge from the church. You were unable to determine their gender, but you noticed that they were carrying a tool box and a block of wood. You watched with curiosity as the person moved away and began carefully laying out their utensils under the tree, while lighting a small lamp they had brought with them. Finally, when they had finished preparing, they took some kind of a tool in their hand and began chalking something on the surface of the wood with it. When you realized that he must have been engaged in caarpentry, you almost didn't choke with excitement. There it was - an almost unnaturally perfect scene for your future painting. A historic wooden church, and next to it a person devoting himself late into the evening to their work. You quickly pulled a sketchbook out of your bag to sketch out a plan for the painting. Unfortunately, unlike the stranger, you didn't have any light source with you, and before the sky completely darkened, you only managed to roughly outline the shapes of your surroundings. You sighed and packed your stuff, deciding that you must also come here the next day, preferably at a similar time. If fate smiles on you, the carpenter will be here again, and you will be able to continue working on your masterpiece.

Chapter Text

You had to admit that the trip to Martinaise had indeed inspired you with creative verve. From the moment you arrived, almost all your thoughts revolved around your new painting, and you didn’t think you've ever felt so motivated before.

It had been four days since you started sketching the church, but you finally managed to measure and transfer all the elements of your surroundings onto the canvas. It wasn't an ideal pace, but in the end no one was rushing you. The carpenter you came across the first time was emerging from the building at the same time every day to continue their work, so you watched them in peace and applied it to your sketch. However, this had one downside - you could only work at dusk, because that was the only time the stranger was in your field of vision. In addition, because you did not want to betray your presence to them, for fear that they would not be willing to be in your painting, you did not bring any light source with you. Drawing in semi-darkness was difficult, so you were really glad that you had finally finished your sketch. Now you could move on to your favourite part - painting. This you could do in almost total darkness. It was hard to describe the sensation, but when you started to cover the canvas with colours you had the feeling as if some external force was guiding you. You didn't have to think about the choice of shades, you just felt which one you should use at any given moment.

That's why, when you located yourself in your painting spot on the fifth day after your arrival at Martinaise, you were really excited. "It's time to give this place some colour." - you thought with a smile, laying out the canvas and other materials you needed. You still had some time until the carpenter arrived, but without waiting for him you started to apply the first coat of paint. You wanted to concentrate on rendering the colour of the evening sky today anyway, so their presence was not necessary at this point.

Absorbed in your work, you completely lost track of time. You did not even realise that the carpenter had not appeared at their usual time in front of the church. The sound of footsteps approaching from behind you also escaped your attention. Only a rough male voice brought you back to reality:

-Stop stalking me. It’s weird.

Hearing this almost made you jump with fright. You momentarily turned towards the voice and suddenly found yourself face to face with the man you had been watching from a distance for almost a week.

You recognised him immediately. Even when you were far away, it was hard not to notice his peculiar clothes and long, slicked-back hair. It was because of these that you had not yet been able to determine the stranger's gender, but now you had no doubt that he was a young man who apparently liked to wear beads and earrings. You were not surprised, the jewellery suited him perfectly, it made him look almost like a work of art. You would have given up a lot to be able to paint him up close....

A few seconds passed before you realised you should say something, instead of just staring at him in awe:

-No, I mean... I'm not stalking you, I swear!

Normally you weren't a shy person, but the man's accusations made your voice crack with nervousness. You also felt a blush cover your face. Damn, why was this situation so awkward?

You were already opening your mouth to continue explaining, but the carpenter interrupted you:

-Whatever, just don't do it. It gives off a really *sus* sine.

You threw him a bewildered look, not understanding what he was talking about. In response, the man sighed and, despite the fact that his eyebrows were built in such a way that he looked perpetually worried, he seemed annoyed with you.

-You know, *sines* are important - he declared seriously, as if he were giving some kind of presentation. -Can't really talk to people before syncing sines with them. Generally your sines aren't bad, I've managed to read them over the last four days. But if you continue to sit here staring at me it could seriously disrupt our synchronicity.

-Wait, so you knew I was here all along? - you asked, feeling the embarrassment growing in you.

-Of course, I just didn't want to talk to you before we were synced.

If it wasn't for the fact that the man had maintained his seriousness throughout the conversation, you'd be sure it was some kind of joke. Everything he had said so far sounded like a very sophisticated excuse for being antisocial. Not wanting to offend him, however, you nodded and announced:

-All right, I won't bother you any more and I'll try to maintain *positive sines*. But believe me I wasn't stalking you, I was just working on a painting and it just so happened that you were also going to be in it.

Saying this, you pointed to your work, spread out on the ground in front of you. In response, you heard the boy draw in an admiring breath and then speak up:

-Now this is some *positive sines* shit. I like the colours, they look very natural.

You sent him a shy smile. Hearing praise from him was a pleasant surprise for you. The man didn't respond with a smile, but after a moment's thought he added:

-You can keep painting it, it looks good, and since it's not about stalking, our sines can stay in sync.

-Thank you. Since you like the painting, I'll make sure to show it once it's done. But I'll be wrapping up for today, the sky has darkened too much.

-Wise decision. You should stick to one colour scheme. Otherwise the colours would be false.

-So... see you tomorrow, I guess.

-Fine - he replied briefly and, without adding anything else, walked off in his own direction.

Chapter Text

It was stupid, but as soon as you finished your conversation with the carpenter and went back to your room in Whirling-in-Rags, you started drawing him. You simply had to capture this man on paper. His appearance, his style of speech and his general enigmatic nature - you needed it all to be recorded in your drawings before it distorted in your head. There was something special about him, you couldn't yet pinpoint what, but something made you drawn to him and you knew you wouldn't be able to sleep peacefully until you knew more about him.

All the next day you waited with anticipation for the evening to come. To speed up the passage of time, you met with Neha. At first you wanted to confide in her about your latest experiences, but in the end you abandoned the idea. Your friend, despite her artistic profession, was a very rational person and would most likely try to bring you down to earth by ridiculing the concept of sines presented by the carpenter. In the end, you simply let her tell you more about Martinaise.

As the sun began to disappear behind the horizon, you said your goodbyes and set off towards the church. As you approached it, you felt a growing uncertainty within you. You were afraid that the man, despite his words yesterday, would not turn up. When you reached your usual spot, there was still half an hour until he should leave the building, so you busied yourself with painting the sky as you had done the day before. However, it didn't go as easily as the previous time, you couldn't concentrate on your work as your gaze kept heading towards the church door.

Fortunately, it wasn't long before the carpenter appeared, cast a brief glance in your direction and, as always, walked over to a nearby tree, under which he began to carefully lay out his tools. You noticed that he precisely cleaned each one and admired it for a moment before placing it on the ground. You watched this ritual for a few minutes, but eventually returned to painting.

You thought that the presence of the man would make you stop being so distracted, but it did the opposite. You realised that you still knew virtually nothing about him, not even what his name was. You tried to shift your attention to the painting, but eventually gave up. You had to go and talk to him before you could get on with your work in peace.

As you approached the carpenter, he did not raise his head from his work, but you noticed that his body tensed, sensing your presence. It was only when you stood over him that he sent you a distrustful look and asked:

-What are you doing here?

-I wanted to know your name - you explained, trying not to show your nervousness.

-I'm just the Noid - he replied briefly, looking at the chisel he was holding.

“Noid? What a strange name" - you thought, concluding that perhaps it was merely a nickname. Although the man didn't ask you to introduce yourself, you quickly revealed your name to him, to which he barely perceptibly nodded.

-So, what are you actually doing here? - you asked, noting the piece of wood he was holding in his lap. You noticed that it was half-decorated with small patterns, apparently carved by Noid.

-It's just something to pass the time, to occupy my hands with something. I'll probably throw it away when I'm done.

-Oh... You shouldn't, it's beautiful.

You were genuinely concerned about the fate of this ornate piece of wood.

The man shrugged his shoulders and returned to his activity. As on the previous day, it seemed to you that he was annoyed with you, so you decided not to continue the conversation.

Nonetheless, you didn't move from your place, watching the work of his hand. You were fascinated by how delicate yet determined his every move was. Unlike painting, there was no room for mistakes here. When you applied colours to a painting you could always change, correct and paint over something. He, however, could not undo the carving he had made in the wood, so everything he did had to be carefully thought out.

You watched his actions in silence until he finally spoke up, not taking his eyes off his work:

-I suck at socializing. No point in standing here - the sines are really out of tune.

You couldn't tell if he was annoyed by your presence at this point, or if he just preferred to be left alone. Either way, not wanting to disturb him any longer, you sent him one last unrequited glance and moved back to your painterly seat, hoping that this was not your last conversation.

You couldn't see it, but as you walked away, the man finally lifted his head and led you away with his eyes, analysing the whole incident in his head. He knew that from your perspective he must have looked like a really fucked up person, but he just wasn't ready to have a longer conversation with you yet. He needed to get to know you better first, to make sure you weren't a threat. "Besides, the sines really are out of tune." - he thought and went back to his work, not looking in your direction again.

Chapter Text

-I just can't believe that some stranger is stopping you from painting.

Eventually, you decided to share your story with Neha and, as you expected, she was not thrilled. In her opinion, you should finish your painting as soon as possible and forget the whole incident.

-Moreover, there are some strange people hanging around in that area. This red-haired boy - she pointed her finger out of the window at some child who was busy breaking glass bottles - brags to anyone who will listen that you can get the best speed in town there.

The girl was probably right. After all, you came here to paint. Yes, you should definitely finish that painting instead of procrastinating so much. You will be able to sell it - you were friends with a certain collector who was happy to buy up all your works - and take up painting something else, perhaps in another part of the city.

You sighed and thanked your friend for her advice. You were already about to gather to leave when Neha said:

-Wait, I have something for you.

Without waiting for your answer, she threw a pair of decorated dice in your direction, which fortunately you managed to catch on the fly. You took a look at them. They were blue and decorated with gold accents.

-I made them today, I don't actually know why myself. They are made of blue lace agate. Take them, maybe one day you will need them – the girl announced and sent you a gentle smile.

You returned the smile and put the dice in your pocket. You didn't play board games very often, but you were still happy to have just received a beautiful souvenir.

When you reached the church at dusk, Noid was already there. You were tempted to go up and greet him, but remembered that you had decided to focus on the painting. The man didn't seem interested in your arrival anyway. When he heard your footsteps he raised his head for a moment, but after few seconds he resumed his work.

You rolled your eyes and went to your place. You had a job to do and it was one you should focus on now.

This and the next few evenings passed pretty much the same way for you. You came to the area around the church, sat down under the abandoned factory, and painted. Both you and the carpenter didn't pay any attention to each other and slowly you started to get used to it. Pretending not to know of each other's existence was now routine, and although you were still curious about the man, there was something reassuring about passing him without a word every day.

Thanks to the fact that you were entirely focused on your masterpiece, the job went much faster. In fact, the only thing left to add was the decoration of the church, which you tried to reproduce faithfully. You were just completing the intricate details of the wooden roof when you heard behind you:

-It was originally painted white. Before the sea wind took all the paint off.

You knew who the voice belonged to, but you turned and looked at the man anyway. Over the past few days you had almost forgotten what his face looked like up close, devoting yourself to painting his silhouette from the distance. This time, however, you didn't let his beauty take you by surprise, instead looking straight into his eyes. Only now did you realise how dark they were. They reminded you of a stormy sky, as gloomy and melanholic as it was.

-How do you know? - you asked, trying to imagine what the church would look like in white.

-Every Dolorian building was like that. Virginal shit, you know. Whatever they made was white, thin and vertical. They liked to show off, adding intricate structures, arches, spires. A false image of grandeur. It was like a temple of Dolores Dei, built in order to show people that they can never be like her.

You were shocked by how extensive his knowledge of the subject was. You also noticed that his every sentence was imbued with an obvious dislike of the Dolorian style. You yourself had never given it a second thought, you just thought it was beautiful and perfect for painting. However, when you leaned into the boy's words, you thought he might have a point. Indeed, even after so many hundreds of years, there was something overwhelming about the building.

You nodded, then you both fell silent for a bit, immersed in your thoughts. Only after a few moments did you realise that once again you had stopped focusing on your painting.

-What are you doing here, anyway? I thought you wanted to be left alone - you looked at him carefully.

-Because I want to. But it's strange to feel someone watching you from a distance. Bad for sines. -He replied, and you only now noticed that he had brought all his carpentry equipment with him.

-So you want to work together? - you made sure, to which Noid nodded and added:

-I guess. In order to keep positive sines, of course.

-Of course. But if you want, I can move to your place. The painting is almost finished anyway -you suggested, but he said with seriousness:

-Oh no, don't do that. That would ruin the authenticity of the painting.

You shrugged your shoulders and, seeing that the man had nothing more to add, you slowly returned to your painting while he began to lay out the carpentry tools on the ground. At first you felt strange painting in his presence, but eventually you stopped caring. Neither of you bothered each other, quietly going about your business, and you had come to a conclusion that his presence was quite soothing. It made the whole desolate corner of Martinaise seem decidedly less depressing.

Chapter Text

Your painting was finally finished. You had to admit that you were really proud of it. So proud, in fact, that you decided not to sell it for the time being and instead it stood against the wall in your room at Whirling-in-Rags. You liked how well you managed to portray the tranquillity of the area around the church. Also, you weren't sure why, but something was stopping you from getting rid of the piece, which reminded you of a certain young carpenter.

Over the last few days, you and Noid had started talking to each other. At first they were brief exchanges, but with each passing day you could see the man opening up to you more and more willingly. In fact, now that you had finished your painting, you should have taken up painting something else, but every evening you came outside the church, not wanting what had developed between you two to come to an end. Besides, you still had plenty of time to work before nightfall. In the Martinaise, you could easily find a scene that begged to be immortalised on canvas.

To keep your hands busy while meeting a man, you started sketching him. When you asked him if you could do it, he first looked at you suspiciously, probably looking for something disturbing in your request.

-I just like your style. It looks very *drawable* - you explained, gazing at the jewellery he was wearing.

-These are just boring, normal, hardcore clothes. But fine. You know how to draw, so I can go for it - he replied, and thus half of your sketchbook was now covered with pictures of Noid, engrossed in working on a piece of wood.

One day you decided to talk to Noid about his above-average knowledge of architecture and woodworking. You suspected that he had received some training in this direction, but you wanted to hear what he had to say about it. As soon as he heard your question, he shook his head and replied with conviction:

-I don't say much anything as a carpenter anymore. They tried to make me into a reckoner and a leveller. Made me a bit manic, y'know?

You looked at him with understanding. As you went to art school yourself, more than once you had to deal with people who abandoned their own style in order to hit the masses and make a lot of money. Of course, everyone needed something to make a living, but this style of work just seemed incompatible with your value system. When you painted something, you didn't care if you could make money from it, you just wanted to represent what you had in your mind.

-I regret the time I dedicated to that proffesion, and that worker collective -the man added, then stroked affectionately the screwdriver he happened to be holding in his hand. -The material knowledge is mega, though. Guild shit. Teaches independence.

His words about the 'worker collective' made you wonder what he was actually doing these days to earn a living. However, you didn't ask him about it, not wanting to invade his personal space. You knew that if he wanted to tell you about it, he probably would have done so by now. For now, this question had to go unanswered.

As you were saying your goodbyes and going your separate ways that same day, you suddenly felt your foot encounter something hard emerging from the sand. You bent down and exposed the object. You realised with surprise that it was a carved piece of wood. Noid's words about simply throwing away his pieces of work after finishing them immediately popped into your head.

Looking closely at the carving, you recognised that it was exactly the same design that the boy had been working on when you started talking to each other. You carefully picked up the wood and, after a moment's thought, tucked it into your pocket. "Something so beautiful can't go to waste" - you thought and set off for the hostel, clutching your find in your hand.

All the way there, you considered how many similar works of art this man had already managed to condemn to oblivion. You felt a little sorry for him. You understood his reasoning, but it still didn't seem right to you that all the effort he had put into this work should go to waste, unappreciated by anyone.

Chapter Text

Until now, since you arrived in Martinaise, the weather had allowed you to spend almost all your days outside. Now, however, with the arrival of the second half of summer, the days became increasingly cloudy. Eventually it rained, and you didn't know what to do with yourself. Sitting from morning to night in your room at the Whirling seemed a complete ordeal, and you didn't want to bother your friend either, after she recently revealed to you that she had been given a huge commission for dice for some new game.

Eventually you decided that, equipped with a raincoat, you would go for a walk. Not knowing how long it would take you, you packed sandwiches in your backpack just in case, which the hostel cook was happy to make for you.

You hadn't planned to do so, but your legs took you by themselves to the area around the Dolorian church. By some miracle, just as you were passing it, its doors opened and you came face to face with your new colleague. He looked as bewildered as you, but you were pleased to discover that his face represented neither nervousness nor anxiety. He was simply pleasantly surprised that you had managed to meet. However, he quickly shrugged it off and, omitting any greeting, explained:

-The power system is down for us, mice or other rascals have chewed through the most important cable. I need to find somewhere to fix it. I can't work in the church without light, it's bloody dark and scary in there now. It's like someone is watching you from the corners.

You nodded with understanding and offered to join him. After all, you had nothing better to do anyway.  After a moment's hesitation, Noid agreed and together you set off to find some shelter from the rain.

-Actually, what do you think of these abandoned FELD buildings? We could try to get inside - you asked, pointing to one of the ruins under which you had been meeting for the last few days.

-I like that idea. These buildings don't have the best sines, but it looks like we could find some brighter place inside - he agreed and, with a glint of excitement in his eyes, added: -Moreover, roaming around abandoned places sounds like a lot of fun. Let's do it.

To get inside, you decided to climb to the roof. There was an iron ladder attached to the wall of the building, which may not have looked very safe, but all other entrances were blocked. You started climbing first, noticing the concern on Noid's face. You knew he didn't like how risky the plan was, but he was really keen to explore the building. Finally, when you had covered almost half the distance, the man shrugged his shoulders, as if trying to convince himself that there was nothing to be afraid of, and then cautiously moved behind you.

Everything was going according to plan, you were already sitting on the roof of the building, watching the boy's struggle with the ladder, when suddenly, to your horror, his foot slipped off a rung wet from the rain.

Your body reacted instinctively, throwing itself to Noid's rescue. Without hesitation, you grabbed his hand, which, under the weight, also began to slide down the ladder. For a moment, your eyes met. The panicked look he threw you filled you with strength. You had to help him. You clenched your teeth and with the most strength you could muster, you pulled the boy up so that he could stand on the rung again.

It worked. After a few tens of tentative seconds, he joined you on the roof of the building and, as quickly as he could, moved away from its edge.

-Fucking shit! - he shouted, trying to mask his fright with anger.

You didn’t know how to react. You didn’t want to stare at him, worrying that presenting himself in such a vulnerable state would make him feel anxious. In the end, you decided to sit back-to-back, wrapping yourself closely with the raincoat.

-Is this why you’re so suspicious? -you suddenly asked, still not looking at him.

-Maybe. Say, I get hurt. I want to make sure it never happens again. So I analyse the situation. Exercise caution. Caution is suspicion -he replied confidently, obviously mad at himself for not listening to his gut and risking using the ladder.

This made sense. The only problem with restraining yourself from doing most of the things was that you miss many pleasant surprises. You didn’t say it though, not wanting to undermine his way of life, especially after the whole ladder ordeal. Instead, you stood up and looked at him questioningly:

-Will you be able to move? We wanted to get inside, not soak on the roof.

After hesitating for a while, Noid sighed, got up, and half-jokingly said:

-Alright. Let’s see what other dangers await in this shithole.

It turned out that the interior of the building was in much worse condition than you had expected. Nonetheless, it was safer moving around it than getting inside and you were relieved to see your companion relax a little, looking at the abandoned rooms with interest.

When you reached the ground floor, he squinted suspiciously, approached one of the walls and said:

-There should be another room here. The wall looks like it was added on later.

Intrigued, you approached him and knocked on the wall for a test. In fact, it made an empty sound, suggesting that something else was behind it. You both began to look for some kind of a hidden door, until finally Noid pointed to a small alcove from which a soft light was emanating. You looked at each other and then without a word you moved into the newly discovered room.

The first thing that caught your eye was the coziness of the place. Although the room was dusty and very small, you could easily imagine how pleasant it must have been to sleep in. You looked at the bunk bed and noticed that there were some propaganda leaflets on it. You turned around to show them to Noid, but saw that he was staring at a sizeable painting hanging on the wall. As you approached it, you realised that it was a portrait of Kras Mazov - one of the leaders of communism. You threw your friend a curious look, trying to read from his face what his opinion of the left was. As you guessed, he was not thrilled.

-Communism is just a bloodier humanism, if you ask me - he said disgusted, and as he heard no objection from you, he continued his argument: -Politics is an inert complex of daily corruption and inane thinkpieces. In fact, I don't think there is a difference between left and right. It's all about some self-appointed *intellectuals* who want to make you believe that they care, while, at the same time, do nothing about people dying on the streets. But I'm only the Noid. What do I know?

You didn't speak for a while, pondering the words in your head. Regardless of what you yourself thought about politics, you were really impressed by how thoughtful his statement was. You had the impression that whatever topic you didn't bring up, this man had a ready-made opinion about it. You just wondered whether such a pessimistic view of the world was adding to his stress. You hoped not.

Having finished inspecting the room, Noid decided to finally get around to fixing the bitten cable. While he took a seat at the desk, you swept the room with your eyes once more. "This place could use a bit of tidying up," you thought, and reached for an old blanket spread out on the bed and carried it out the door to get rid of the layer of dust covering it.

When you finished wiping down the cupboard standing in the corner half an hour later, you were proud to say that the room now seemed like a really comfortable place. The warm, stimulating light was shining on your friend, who, bent over his desk, was trying to finish soldering a cable. From outside the window you could hear the cries of seagulls, reminding you that you were only a few dozen metres from the sea. You also realised that you still had the sandwiches in your backpack that you had taken from the hostel that morning, and once Noid had finished his work, you would be able to eat them together.

You smiled to yourself and admitted in spirit that you wouldn't mind spending the rest of your life this way.

Chapter Text

The holidays were slowly passing by, coming to an end already, and you tried not to think about what would happen if you had to leave Martinaise and go back to university. You really liked this place. You liked the proximity of your friend Neha, you liked the picturesque countryside surrounding the town and, above all, you enjoyed spending your days in the company of Noid. Since you found your way to the secret room in the FELD building, you met there practically every day. Even if one of you had a bad day, which in the case of your colleague was quite often, you still found time for each other. Sometimes you would debate for hours without even touching the work tools you had brought with you, and sometimes you would busy yourself with your respective activities in comfortable silence - you with painting, he with carpentry.

That's why, when one day the man didn’t show up, you felt anxious. Only yesterday you had agreed that when you met tonight, he would play you "some deep hard core shit" on the tape player. Unfortunately, although you waited all afternoon for his arrival, it never happened. You returned disappointedly to your hostel room, trying to explain away his absence. After all, your meetings were not some formal event and you should not blame him if this one time he decided to spend time doing something else.

However, when this situation has repeated the next day as well, you were seriously upset. You began to recall your last moments together in your mind, hoping to get a clue as to what Noid was up to now. You couldn't recall him informing you of any plans, but you realised with trepidation that he seemed to have been in a slightly worse shape for the past week or so. His skin was paler and the sweater he usually wore looked even more oversized than usual.

Plunged into these thoughts, you decided that there was only one way to find out if there was anything wrong with the boy. You had to go to the church.

Until now, you had not been there even once. You knew how valuing of privacy your friend was, so you didn't want to invade his space. Admittedly, you had sometimes looked at the Dolorian building with curiosity, wondering what was hidden inside and in what conditions Noid lived, but you were afraid that trying to find out would cause him unnecessary uncertainty and discomfort.

Now, however, was the time to take the risk. Even if the boy would get upset with you, you preferred that to sitting alone and worrying about his health.

As you approached the church, the sounds of music reached you. It sounded exactly like what you imagined the aforementioned "deep hard core shit" to be, so you took that as a good sign. Clearly your friend was inside. You hesitated one last time, then crossed the premises of the building....

At the same time you were assaulted by colourful lights, a peculiar chemical scent and music that echoed through the soaring building and seemed ten times louder than outside. Overwhelmed, you squinted and looked around. To your immense relief, it took you little time to locate Noid. He was standing next to a table set up against the opposite wall, apparently completely sane and immersed in a discussion with some blonde man you didn't know. You struggled to refrain from running up to him and accosting him with questions about his absence. It seemed that the men had not noticed your presence so far. You could have stepped back at this point, left the building and waited for your friend to decide to speak to you himself. You didn't, however, intrigued by the scene unfolding in the church. Now that you were inside, curiosity took over and you needed to find out what was actually going on.

You stepped forward and finally managed to draw the boys' attention to your arrival. Hearing your footsteps, they both quickly moved away from each other, standing with their backs to the table. When your eyes met Noid's, you could have sworn you saw a shadow of fear running across his face. However, he quickly got rid of it, and after a few seconds you weren't so sure anymore if you hadn’t simply imagined it.

-Good afternoon, could I find out to what we owe your visit?

You shifted your gaze to the other man, who turned to you, showing a cultured interest. You felt somewhat stressed by his presence. You came here to see your friend, not to meet new people.

-Who are you? - you asked before you could bite your tongue. You didn't want to say the question out loud, but you also couldn't reveal to this stranger the reason for your visit.

-Oh, indeed, where have my manners gone? I'm Andre, and this is my posse: Noid, - he pointed to his companion, who wordlessly lowered his gaze and began polishing the wrench he was holding. Before you had time to react in any way, the blond man pointed his hand to the left, where, as you only now discovered, a teenage girl was sitting, looking at you uncertainly: - and Acele. You'll have to forgive them, they're both quite taciturn.

You automatically nodded, plunging into your thoughts. Why was this whole situation so awkward? You knew that Noid wasn't a particularly sociable person, but even for him, this kind of behaviour was strange. You had known each other for almost two months, so you would have expected him to greet you in any way, or let his colleague know that you knew each other. He, however, remained silent, completely absorbed in his wrench. "Alright, let it be" - you thought with slight exasperation, summoned a forced smile to your face and spoke up:

-I actually ended up here by accident. I was looking for my friend.

You noticed that Noid's face twisted slightly again, but he continued to ignore you, letting his friend speak.

-I'm sorry to hear that – the blonde replied, and continued, moving slightly to the side: -Unfortunately, as you can see, there's no one here but the good old us.

And then you saw *it*. The thing that the men had been trying to hide from your view all along. On the table behind them, a still smouldering burner shone, heating a beaker filled with a yellowish substance. In addition, now that you had begun to realise what this was all about, your attention was drawn to the Nosaphed packets scattered around and several cans of distilled water.

They were cooking speed.

Noid wasn't meeting you because he was busy cooking fucking speed.

"There are some strange people hanging around in that area," "That red-haired boy brags to anyone who will listen that you can get the best speed in town there." - your friend Neha's words, spoken a few weeks earlier, dawned in your mind as if through a fog. So Neha was right, the waterfront was indeed inhabited by strange people, and you, completely unknowingly, spent every day with one of them. You were reminded of all those moments when you wondered where Noid got the money to support himself.

Now it was all coming together.

You needed to leave this place and get a breath of fresh air. Only now did it hit you how filled with distillation fumes the building was. Without paying any more attention to how it would be perceived, you turned on your heel and, slowly at first and then more and more quickly, ran away from your friend.

Chapter Text

That night you didn't sleep a wink, trying to explain to yourself how you could have failed to notice that the person you spent most of your time with was involved in the production of drugs. If it had been about just taking them, you wouldn't have been so overwhelmed by it; after all, it was hard not to try a narcotic at least once when you lived in Revachol. Here, however, the matter was more serious - synthesising and trafficking drugs was a really serious offence. You didn't even want to think how many people, including children similar to the red-headed boy hanging around outside Whirling-in-Rags, had been driven into addiction by the substance your friend was distributing.

When you finally, in the morning, managed to fall asleep for a short while, your dreams did not let you forget the whole situation. In them, you saw Noid, who, together with the so-called Andre, were pulling ecstasy pills, wrapped in colourful papers, out of a big bag and then distributing them to children. You tried to talk to them, but in response the men handed you the sweets too. You couldn't control yourself, instead shoving the drug into your mouth.

Then the dream changed. The scenery took on a bleak, washed-out colour, and you realised you were in a police station. You moved deeper into the corridor that opened up in front of you, passing empty prison cells on either side. When you reached the end, you noticed that there were two people inside. You immediately recognised your friend, who was lying on the floor pressing his knees to his chest. He looked worse than ever - sunken eyes, protruding cheekbones and dry, brittle hair - he was in the final stages of addiction. You shifted your attention to the RCM officer leaning over him. He momentarily looked at you and, with a demonic smile on his lips, announced:

-You have come at the perfect time. The execution is about to take place.

You woke up screaming, unable to bear the nightmare any longer.

You had to talk to Noid.

And since you were not going to visit the church again, you decided to make one last, desperate attempt to go to *your* place.

You didn't expect to find the man on the spot, and yet, when you found yourself inside the abandoned building, you immediately sensed his presence. Without hesitation, you made your way to the hidden room where you had spent carefree, quiet moments together over the past weeks, and that's when you saw him. He was sitting at his desk, bent over his toolbox, and you felt a sting in your heart. It would be so easy now to keep quiet about yesterday's incident, to talk to him as if nothing had happened. To ask him to play "some deep hard core shit" and just feel good.

But that wasn't possible. Not until you heard from him what he had to say to you about the incident in the church.

As you looked at the man, you noticed that his muscles were slightly tense, indicating that he knew you were coming but chose to ignore it. This was so frustrating. Normally you didn't mind his withdrawal, but now you needed him to give the impression, at least for a moment, that he cared what someone other than himself had to say.

-Could you talk to me? - you asked nervously, poking your gaze into his back.

-I do. But the sines are out of tune, so I doubt this conversation will lead to anything - he replied, still not looking in your direction.

-Well, on the subject of *sines* - were they out of tune yesterday too, so you decided to pretend we didn't know each other?

-Something like that, yes. Besides, it wouldn't have changed anything. You wouldn't be friends with Andre, so there's no need to introduce you to each other.

You were already preparing to respond, but you closed your eyes and breathed deeply. You needed to calm down, otherwise you wouldn't actually get anywhere.

-All right, let's not talk about Andre - you finally spoke up, trying to alleviate the situation.

-Good.

-But all this equipment... Are you guys really in the drug business? - You carefully voiced the question, watching his reaction.

It seemed to you that as he began to speak, the tips of his fingers squeezing the toolbox turned white, as if he had strengthened his grip:

-Chemistry is great. Besides drugs make you feel really good. Really *transcendent*.

-That's your excuse for distributing drugs to these, already fucked, people? That they can feel *transcendent*?

Once again, you could feel the anger rising inside you. You didn't want to argue with Noid, but the way he spoke about it all sounded so naïve. It was as if the man had never seen people, who had long since passed the safe dosage limit, dying on the streets of Revachol.

He shrugged his shoulders and opined:

-Pull out that stick. They decide for themselves what they're doing. It's not like I'm forcing anyone to take anything.

You tried one last time to reason with him, using the only argument you could think of:

-Please, just don't do it. I know you can be above this business. With your carpentry skill you could earn your livelihood in peace without risking getting caught by the police.

Noid finally looked in your direction, his tired eyes meeting yours, half-filled with tears as he spoke:

-I didn't ask you for advice. It's my business what I do and exactly what I want to do to make money.

You've had enough of this. You pressed your lips together and turned to leave. At the last moment, however, you remembered two, small items hiding in your pocket. It was cliche, but even though you had decided that you had nothing more to say to this man, you felt the need to distinguish somehow your, ending, relationship.

Without thinking, you grasped one of the blue dice your friend had given you a few weeks ago and placed it on the edge of the desk occupied by the man.

-Take it as a keepsake - you said and quietly added, leaving the room: -And don't get yourself killed.

This was the last time the two of you met in this, forgotten by the rest of the world, room.

Chapter Text

There was one week left until the end of your vacation. Now that Martinaise reminded you of your prematurely ended relationship with a certain carpenter, you would have been most eager to return home already, but unfortunately you were doomed to wait for the next bi-weekly train.

You spent your last days wandering around the eastern part of the city, watching Cuno and reading. You didn't have the strength or desire to paint. That would have required you to focus on your emotions, and you preferred not to touch those for now.

In fact, you didn't know yourself why you were affected so much by what had happened between you and the man. After all, you had known each other for less than three months, you never even found out what his real name was. Maybe you just felt bad because the vacations were coming to an end? “Yes, that's definitely why.” - you tried to convince yourself. Admitting that you had become attached to this disturbed, paranoid man was way beyond your comfort zone.

During one of your walks through the city, you came across an elderly man, alone eating a sandwich. Actually, you had seen him before, but never spoke to him, absorbed in your own affairs. Now, however, as you spent every evening alone, you finally decided to speak up. He looked friendly, and the kindness of another person was exactly what you needed at that moment.

As soon as you approached the old man, he looked at you from above his sandwich and with a gleam in his eyes whispered:

-René, old friend, is that you?

You slowly shook your head and introduced yourself, and the man's face momentarily saddened. He looked disappointed, but shifted on the bench to make room for you and announced:

-I am deeply sorry. When you are my age, you see familiar faces everywhere. Come, sit here.

Obediently you crouched down next to him, looking at him with curiosity.

-If you don't mind me asking, who is this René?

-Who was René. He is no longer with us - he answered, and shivers went through you. Maybe you shouldn't have asked that question? However, the man continued, while a shadow of a smile appeared on his lips: -René was a stubborn, jaded moron, that's what. All he did was parade around in that awful uniform and praise the monarchy. In fact, he didn't resemble you at all. Once again, I apologize for my mistake - he finished hastily, as if ashamed of his memories.

-It's all right - you reassured him, also bringing a slight smile to your face. -That René and you must have been close.

-As close as can be - he confirmed and lowered his gaze. -He was not perfect, we both hurt each other many times. There were days when I completely crossed out our relationship. But now that he is gone, I would give anything to play boule with him this one last time.

When the man fell silent, you felt tears come to your eyes. To stick by someone for so many years despite his flaws - it must have been true love.

You continued to talk to each other for a while, no longer returning to the subject of René, but in your mind you still saw the hopeful expression on the old man's face when he mistook you for his friend. You wondered if you should learn a lesson from this.

Chapter Text

-Good luck with everything. I hope we can see you sooner than next year.

Your last meeting with Neha was just coming to an end. Tomorrow, first thing in the morning, you were to head for the train that would take you home after almost three months of vacation. Away from your friend, away from your room in Whirling-in-Rags and away from him.

A small part of you hoped that by some miracle you would still see each other before you left Martinaise for good. In reality, however, you knew that this would not happen. It was too late for that. The next day you will be miles away, slowly returning to your university lifestyle, and he will stay in the old Dolorian church, forgetting that he ever spoke to you. If you come here in a year's time, he won't be around anymore, after all, engaging in such a business you have to be constantly on the move.

You hugged Neha, walked through a corridor of ruined rooms, and after a while you were in Whirling. You were surprised to see that the bar manager was trying to call you over. “He probably wants to know what time I'm going to leave the room,” you deduced, and approached him, bypassing the people dancing on the dance floor.

-Good evening. I have a train at 7 in the morning, so I will be leaving at 6:30 - you announced, without waiting for him to ask you himself.

-I'm glad. Try not to make any noise – the man replied, looking at you with bored eyes -But that's not what I wanted to talk about. Some girl came to visit you. She looked suspicious, so I hope I won't find broken windows in your room tomorrow.

What was he talking about? The only girl who could visit you was Neha, but after all, you had just talked to her. You were tempted to ask him to describe the stranger, but you didn't want to add to his worries. The man was already bending over backwards trying to keep the place running. He didn't need to know that you had no idea what was going on. You brought a smile to your face and asked where can you find the girl in question.

-I sent her under your room so she wouldn't scare guests. She really looks suspicious - he sighed and sent you a hesitant look -Listen... If you have a problem, try to settle it outside my place.

-It's all right, please don't worry - you calmed him down and moved to the second floor, trying to hide your uncertainty.

It took a moment before you realized who the person waiting for you at the top of the stairs was. If it weren't for her distinctive short hair, you probably wouldn't have recognized her at all. After all, you had only seen each other once, and under not very friendly circumstances.

-Acele? - you asked, finding the teenager's name in the depths of your memory.

-Yes - she nodded and, without hesitating, continued: -I know we don't know each other, but I have to ask you something....

Only now did you notice how tense she was. It probably cost her a lot of mental effort to come here. You smiled slightly, wanting to show support, but when you heard her next words, the smile froze on your lips:

-This is about Noid. He needs your help.

Chapter Text

Once again you were heading to the Dolorian church, while Acele, walking by your side, was introducing you to the situation.

Her arrival was like a switch - five minutes earlier you were wondering what you would wear to the start of the academic term, and now all you could think about was him. You no longer cared if you could make it to tomorrow morning's train, you just had to find out if Noid was okay. You didn't even know how many feelings you had been suppressing inside you during the last weeks of your separation. All the longing, sympathy and something else you couldn't name at the moment flooded you at once, forcing you to run towards the church. Turns out, you were never prepared to part with him. Be that as it may.

Acele's words reached you as if through a fog. The girl told you about their original plan to set up a club in an abandoned building. Apparently there was another boy with them at the time, who left after a while, not wanting to get involved in drug production. She mentioned that they called him Egg Man. Or was it Egg Head? Never mind, the important thing was that since the departure of Egg person their lineup began to fall apart. It turned out that speed production, which was originally intended only as a source of financial support for the club, was making more profit than anyone could have predicted.

The sudden influx of cash became a source of argument between Noid and Andre. The two had different visions for the future of the club, and without Egg there was no one to curb the disagreements between the two men with his carefree nature. Acele had no clout, moreover, she was Andre's partner, so she was unable to remain impartial. Noid's paranoia didn't help either, making him worry all the time that Andre's bad decisions would lead to them being caught by the RCM. That, and the fact that the friends did not limit themselves when testing their produce.

-They often argued, but today was the worst. - Acele said, getting to the point: -They both got stoned and at first everything was fine, but then Noid... Noid threw the lab equipment at the church stained glass window, shouting something about a mass murderer looking down on him. When Andre realized that all their equipment had been destroyed, he got seriously pissed, started saying really unpleasant things.... - The girl took a short pause, then continued in a trembling voice: -Without going into details, he said that by tomorrow Noid must leave the church and forget about any club in Martinaise. Everything we've been working toward for the past year is gone.

You stopped to give her a hug, seeing how much their plan not seeing the light of day worried her. She, however, straightened up, took a deep breath and finished:

-All right, it's nothing. Anyway, that's why I came to you. I feel silly to ask this, but Noid really needs to get out of the church. Listen... He has nowhere to sleep. When we met last year on a pilgrimage, I managed to find out that he ran away from home. You know him, he was saying something to the effect that he serves no master but the beat. He probably just didn't have the money to support himself.

You looked at Acele shocked, trying to process her request in your head. Did she want you to take this man under your roof? Even if by some miracle he would agree to it, the room you rented for the duration of the academic year would not accommodate the two of you. It was simply impossible.

Suddenly another thing came to you.

-Wait, how did you even knew that I know Noid? We never spoke to each other in your company - you asked, unable to come up with any meaningful answer to that.

-Ah, yes... -the girl began speaking quietly, and a shy smile appeared on her face -It was not difficult to guess that he had met someone. He was a little less paranoid than usual, looking almost happy. A couple of times I even saw him talking to you around the church. At the time I still didn't know it was *you*, but when you showed up that one day, I recognized you right away. All I had to do was look at you to know that you two had something in common - she explained, and seeing your perplexed look, she quickly added: -Don't worry, Andre is too stupid. He didn't notice anything.

-Sorry, but I have to disappoint you. We don't talk to each other anymore. Exactly since that incident in the church - you said in pain, staring at the ground.

-Oh... That explains a lot. It explains why Noid has been behaving more Noid-ish than ever over the past weeks. Why he quarreled with Andre and started forcing so many drugs into himself - she said, and her pupils dilated from the sudden realization.

You felt tears coming to your eyes. It was your fault that Noid had brought himself to such a state. You should never have broken off contact with him. You shouldn't have left him alone. No...

No, you couldn't influence him. 

It was his choice to let you go instead of talking to you. You did your best to stop him.

Now, however, you could have done something else. You could have helped him get out of that environment. You already knew that what you were about to tell Acele would be a serious decision, but you didn't care.

-All right. Let's go look for this idiot.

Chapter Text

You entered the building alone. You agreed with Acele that her presence would unnecessarily stress the man.

When you saw him sitting in a corner of the quiet, empty church, for the first moment you didn't know how to react. From what she said, the man was still under the influence of drugs. This, combined with his peculiar character, meant that you had to be extremely careful not to throw him off balance.

You took a few steps forward, and he immediately raised his head, looking straight at you.

-What are you doing here? - he asked in a shaky voice that, in contrast to his usual rough tone, seemed softer than ever.

-I just wanted to see you.

-Is it Andre who sent you here? So you could laugh at me?

His lack of confidence hurt you a bit, but in the end it was everything Noid. What else could you have expected? 

You stepped closer, then sat down next to him on the ground, speaking up:

-No, it has nothing to do with Andre. I missed you.

The man looked at you, looking for falseness on your face, but apparently did not find it, because after a while he leaned his head against the wall and said:

-This place fucking sucks. Even without this woman, I still feel like something bad is about to happen all the time.

You looked in the direction of the stained glass window he had broken. The damage was indeed severe. You were glad that at that moment Noid did not look like he had the strength to repeat the incident. His breathing was calm and his pupils were slightly diminished. When he saw where your gaze had wandered, he quietly added:

-Fucker was giving me the evil eye.

-It's okay, she's no longer here - you replied calmly, to which he unexpectedly grabbed your hand and asked in an exasperated voice:

-So you understand me? It was her fault. Please say that you understand.

This was not quite true, but hoping to improve his mood, you agreed with him. The man, who just a moment earlier seemed to be on the verge of crying, now seemed fully satisfied.

-I knew you would understand - he whispered in relief, and you felt him clasp his hand more tightly over yours.

Looking at him, you concluded that there would be no better opportunity to propose to him what you had agreed with Acele. Without letting go of his hand you spoke up:

-Maybe you would like to get out of here? We could go together to my place, it's much more comfortable there. And there are no stained glass windows with women.

-Sure, I'll go anywhere, just so I don't have to sit in this damn church any longer. I just need to find my tools.

You couldn't believe how easy it was to convince him. Acele had promised you earlier that she would pack his belongings at night and hand them over to the Whirling manager the next day, so when after 15 minutes Noid rummaged his toolbox from somewhere, you were ready to go.

You tried not to pay attention to it, after all, the man was high, but all the way to the hostel, he didn't even let go of your hand for a moment.

Chapter Text

When you finally arrived at your apartment, you ordered Noid to lie down on the couch located in the main room. The man did not protest, but when you informed him that you would now go to the second floor to your bed, he panickedly grabbed your hand again.

-Don't leave me here. I don't want to be alone with them - he said, pleadingly looking into your eyes.

This behavior was so out of character for Noid that you had no doubt - the substances he had taken were still in his system. Still, seeing how scared he was, you simply couldn't refuse him. You nodded and, without letting go of his hand, sat down on the floor next to the couch.

For the next hour, you listened to his nonsensical, junkie talk about a noise-based society and the government's control of humanity by spraying intoxicating substances into the air. It would certainly have been an interesting conversation if it weren't for the fact that it was 4 a.m. and you were so anxious to sleep.

It wasn't until dawn began to break outside that Noid sagged. Seeing that he had not spoken a word for fifteen minutes, you tried to slide your hand out of his grasp. He, however, momentarily after you let him go, whispered in his sleep:

-Stay...

You had no choice. You embraced the man's hand, silently promising him that you weren't going anywhere, closed your eyes and, leaning against the hostel wall, fell asleep.

It was already past noon when a pain in your back made you wake up. It took you a moment to recall the events of the night, but as soon as the image of a stoned Noid dawned in your mind, you panickedly began looking around the room for him. He wasn't on the couch, that was certain. Your hand tried in vain to reach his. You also didn't notice that anyone was in the bathroom; it was dark inside.

“The roof” - you thought and ran up the stairs with all your might, afraid of what you would do if you didn't find him there.

To your relief, Noid was actually on the roof. He was sitting with his back to the window, staring motionlessly at the sky. Thinking little, you grabbed the blanket lying on the bed and opened the glass door to join him.

-Here, you must be cold - you said, handing the boy the blanket.

He accepted it from you without a word, and you looked at him carefully. Something didn't suit you about his appearance, but you couldn't determine what. Only after a few seconds did you realize that the man was not wearing his standard jewelry, and his hair was uncombed. You were struck by how vulnerable he seemed in such a state. For the first time, you saw him for who he really was - a lost boy from some poor Faubourgian family who had just stopped being a teenager.

-It was a really fucked up bad trip -he finally spoke up without looking in your direction.

-How do you feel now? - you asked, guessing what the answer would be.

-Like shit.

Silence fell between you again for some time. You had nothing more to add. Making him feel remorseful at this point was not a good idea. He himself realized that last night was definitely *too* hard core.

-So, what do you plan to do now? - you turned to him when you felt that he had managed to calm down a bit.

-I have no idea. Maybe I'll go back to Boogie Street, there's always a place to sleep.

-You could stay with me for a while - you said quietly, and after a while you added: -I'll go call the university now. I'll tell them that for the first week I won't show up for classes. You in the meantime decide what you want to do with yourself. If you're not here when I get back, I'll understand....

You walked through the door, fighting the urge to tell him more. To say how much you would like him to stay. To say that at that moment you were able to drop out of college, just to be by his side.

In the end, however, you didn't. There was no need to do so.

When you returned to your room an hour later, you found him on the couch, cleaning his carpentry tools.

Although neither of you said it out loud, you both knew that you would never be alone again.

Chapter Text

You sighed. The mid-semester break had begun, and the first snow had fallen outside. You would have enjoyed it far more if not for a two-hour train ride from downtown Revachol to Martinaise awaiting you. You just hoped that the train would not encounter any weather-related delays. It had been almost a week since you last saw Karl, and you couldn't bear the thought that something might prolong your separation.

Combining your studies with weekly returns to Martinaise was tough. It would have been much easier if you had simply moved in together, but your downtown apartment was not suitable for the two of you. You knew that the man needed a lot of space for himself, and at your place there was barely enough for one person. You had been looking around for a long time for a new, bigger place, but since you found nothing, you decided that he would stay in Whirling-in-Rags while you visited him every weekend.

As you took your seat on the train, your thoughts immediately went to Karl. You wondered what he had been doing for the past few days. It hadn't escaped your attention that he hadn't been making as many wooden creations as before for some time. You trusted him, but you couldn't fully get rid of the slight feeling of uneasiness about leaving him alone. The good thing was that, thanks to the holidays, you would be able to spend the next two weeks with him. Make sure that he definitely did not go back to his previous lifestyle.

Despite the weather worsening every moment, the road to Martinaise went without a hitch. Before you knew it, you were already standing at the door of your room in Whirling. Although you had the keys to it, you knocked anyway. No answer. When, after the fifth attempt, the door still remained locked, you felt a growing fear inside you. What if your fears about Karl's return to drugs were closer to the truth than you thought? You grasped the key in your hand and prepared to press the handle, when suddenly a voice came from behind you:

-Stop stalking me. It’s weird.

You turned around and after just a moment you held your beloved in your embrace. You knew that he was not a big fan of physical contact, but you didn't care. After all, you hadn't seen him for a whole week.

Only after a few minutes did you decide to let him go. You took a closer look at him and, to your great relief, didn't notice any signs of drug usage. Damn, you should put more faith in this man. 

-Can we enter the room now? - he asked, and only then did you realize that he had been holding his several-kilogram carpentry toolbox in his hands the whole time. It must have been hard for him.

As soon as you walked through the door, you were struck by the order inside. The SOUVENIRS that you had carried into the room for the past six months had disappeared somewhere, and only one small object caught your attention.

-I can't believe you still have it - you whispered, taking into your hand a blue dice, the same as the one at the bottom of your pocket.

-It would be pretty fucked up if I didn't have it, don't you think? - replied Karl, walking up to you and taking the dice from your hands. -It was probably the first gift I ever got in my life. And I still haven't repaid you for it - he added after a moment, avoiding your gaze.

-You don't have to repay me. That's what gifts are all about - you said, moved by his words. Didn't he understand the joy of giving for the sake of giving?

-But I want to. Did you know that in Zsiemsk there is a chapel built from human skulls ? - he quickly changed the subject, and you didn't press him any further. If he wants to talk about the chapel made of human skulls, let him.

The rest of the evening passed you by in conversations of this kind. Karl would tell you some random tidbit of information, you would listen to him in silence, as always fascinated by his vast knowledge, and then you would add some comment from yourself, which the man more or less believed to be correct. When you finally felt sleepy, you unceremoniously hugged him and placed your finger on his lips, informing him to shut up. He obeyed you, and although he tried to look annoyed, after a while you felt him rest his head on your shoulder and grasp your hand, as was his habit before bedtime.

With snow still falling outside the window the next morning, you prepared to spend another lazy day at your beloved's side without moving from your room. Not that you minded. You still haven't touched the book you bought last week that you planned to read together.

To your surprise, however, you heard Karl calling you from the lower part of the apartment. You hastily ran down the stairs, and, looking skeptically at your pajamas, he announced:

-Dress normally. It's cold outside.

You weren't sure if this wasn't some kind of joke. The man was not often so full of energy in the morning. However, you decided to obey his command and after a while you were ready to leave Whirling-in-Rags.

-Will we make a snowman or what? - you asked, but you did not get any answer from him. Instead, without a word he grabbed your hand and began to lead you in a direction only he knew.

Your curiosity intensified when you realized that apparently the man had set his sights on the well-known Martinaise train station.

-Is this supposed to be some kind of excursion? - you tried again, to which he replied:

- I don't know. Maybe. Maybe not.

You rolled your eyes, but did not protest. You didn't even speak up after Karl packed you into the oncoming train. Ultimately, it looked like he had a plan, so you were left with no choice but to watch what would come of it.

The trip took an hour or so. With nothing more interesting to do, you rested your head on your beloved's shoulder and watched from under half-closed eyelids as he played with a pocketknife pulled from somewhere. You had long ago stopped inquiring as to how he always had a tool with him. “A man can get away from carpentry, but carpentry won’t get away from a man.” - you thought with a smile, hugging the man tighter.

When Karl informed you that you had reached your destination, you looked at him bewildered.

-This is the middle of nowhere - you said, looking around uncertainly at the snowy forest in which you found yourself. The only building that seemed to be in the area was a small wooden hut, emerging from between the trees.

-It's still a better middle of nowhere than Martinaise. An hour's drive from the center - he shrugged his shoulders and started walking away from the station.

You followed him, trying to figure out what this was all about. After a while it became clear that you were heading exactly towards the shack.

-Do you know who lives here? - you asked, and with amazement you noticed a smile appearing on his face.

-Yes.

In an instant, everything began to come together. Fewer wooden creations, his absence from Whirling yesterday, the order in your room.

-You... alone...? - you tried to form a meaningful sentence, feeling tears come to your eyes.

-I always said that I would want to build a safe place for myself and my own as well. It wasn't even...

The rest of his statement was prevented by your kiss.

The road had been long, but now you were sure that nothing more would stand in your way. Finally, your sines were in sync.