Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Being a Sinner, Adam had concluded, fucking sucked.

No wonder all the people at that Hotel wanted redemption, at least Winner’s didn’t have fucking jobs. Okay, technically he had a job, but he only worked one day a year, so it didn’t really count. Adam was really craving a boba.

Hmm, he should actually make some. He knew how, since he had been eating it since its creation. And the ingredients were actually pretty simple. His lack of funds might hold him back slightly, but all he really needed to fix that was to sell boba. Oh… well, this was a never ending cycle.

Plus, he didn’t have the time to start a business, he was going to get back to Heaven. It wasn’t hard, his boyfriend was in charge of the Pearly Gates. Though Peter might be a bit annoyed that he was, well, a Sinner.

Okay, new plan.

He would get himself redeemed, get up to Heaven, meet up with his boyfriend, and then never think about this again. It couldn’t be that hard.

—---—

Step One: Figure Out Why You’re In Hell

This step was easy enough, in Adam’s opinion. Contrary to popular belief, he was self aware. He knew that murder was not exactly a Winner Trait. He was literally there when his son committed the first murder and killed Abel. He saw what happened.

It was why he waited until after he died to start killing Sinners.

Wow, this whole redemption thing was easier than he thought so far. With that in mind, Adam snapped the lock off of a closed grocery store’s window. He flung it open and easily climbed inside. Honestly, this shouldn’t count against him in terms of his redemption, he was essentially fighting a capitalistic state.

Once inside the store, Adam walked over and began to scan the shelves. “Sugar.” he muttered, picking it up. “Tapioca starch, I can’t believe they carry this, and water.” Adam nodded when he was done, carrying the fruits of his labors. He then climbed over the counter with more elegance than you might expect, and began to boil the water on the break room stove. It was broken, and kept flickering uncomfortably, but it still worked.

Now for the reason he was making Boba in the first place.

Bribery.

Based on Charlie’s reaction, she had no idea what Boba was when she came up to Heaven, meaning they probably didn’t have any boba shops here in hell. Therefore, he would use his genius and ability to make boba to bribe her into letting him stay at the Hotel and use their resources while he worked towards redemption.

He was even willing to offer to stay out of everyone’s way, he just needed a place to sleep and get consistent meals. He knew the other members of the Hotel wouldn’t want to help him, and even Charlie might not. But he needed to take the small chance.

Was bribery a moral course of action? No, definitely not. But at this point, Adam did not care. Half the shit humans called immoral and illegal were perfectly fine to God. Like dating a minor, or being trans, or believing in another God. You wouldn’t go to Heaven, you’d go to your respective afterlife, but he didn’t hate those who didn’t believe in him. God loved everyone. It was kinda his whole shtick.

Adam sighed and finished making his dough. He removed it from the pot and placed it on the counter, which he had wiped down and covered in Tapioca flour. He began to knead it, putting a lot of weight into it. God, he would die, again, for a quality coffee right now.

Adam then began to shape them into the pearls. First he rolled them into thin strips, and sliced them into small sections. Taking the little sections, he carefully rolled them into small little balls. Then, looking at the saucepan of boiling water, he carefully added them. He took care to not let the water splash him as he did so. He stirred them to prevent any from sticking from the bottom, and when there was the mini whirlpool inside, he covered it with the lid.

He had 20 minutes to wait, so he decided to spend that time staring into a mirror and judging himself.

He wasn’t anything special. His mask horns had become real horns, and his curly hair was back to a deep brown instead of gray-ish like in Heaven. He honestly looked a lot like himself outside of the new and more demonic features. Alongside the horns, his wings were now pitch black and burnt.

His nose was now an animal nose, like a dog or sheep. And his mouth connected to it in a similar fashion. It felt weird to open his mouth.

With a sigh, Adam turned away and looked at his clothes. Luckily, he was no longer wearing his Exterminator robes, and was instead wearing a shirt for some rock band, though he wasn’t sure which, a leather jacket, and a pair of jeans. He was still chubby, which Adam was thankful for. He didn’t want to lose even more of himself.

It had only been a day since the end of the first failed Extermination. Despite this, when Adam looked out the mirror, he could see the Hotel, bigger and more flashy this time, shining in the distance. Well, the structure at least. It appeared to be unfinished. Ugh. Gross.

With a sigh, Adam got up and began finishing the boba.

He had to start work on the next step of the plan.

—---—

Step Two: Establish a Positive Presence in One or More People’s Lives

This step was going to be made slightly harder by virtue of the fact that everyone at the Hotel fucking hated him.

He couldn’t do some random Sinner on the street, that was likely to backfire. And he couldn’t do someone like Vaggie, that cunt, or Charlie. Angel Dust seemed like a bad idea in general, due to his clear trauma surrounding porn, and Adam’s overly sexual persona, alongside his friend Cherri Bomb, because of the whole killing her boyfriend thing.

Husker seemed like he could go either way, though he seemed very protective of his friends.

That left Charlie or Alastor. He wasn’t going to do Niffty for obvious reasons.

Adam walked quietly down the street towards the Hotel.

Alastor was a finicky choice, given their history of Adam, you know, beating the shit out of him.

So it came down to Charlie. But starting with Charlie was a bad move in general. She needed proof over all.

So, in the end, the only person that Adam could use for this step was the Radio Demon Alastor.

Adam sighed. The hard part was going to be finding the Radio Demon in the first place. He needed to find him when he was alone, obviously. Then he had to convince Alastor to not kill him. Then he had to convince Alastor to let him hang around for long enough to, well, make a good impression.

As Adam walked aimlessly down the road, he stumbled upon a mysterious seemingly abandoned radio tower. It was crumbling and falling apart, and a haunting song came from inside it.

Adam frowned. That was odd.

Quickening his pace, Adam made his way to the tower and looked inside. Inside was, thank fuck, Alastor the Radio Demon. He looked quite injured, and was singing something about wings, and death and shit. Adam frankly did not care.

However, this was his in. With a confidence he did not feel, Adam walked in. “Do you know nothing about wound care?” he asked, tapping his foot.
Alastor whipped around and looked at the First Man. “I– curses.” Alastor cut himself off as he hissed, putting a hand onto his wound.

Adam sighed and walked over to him. “Clearly not. Sit the fuck down, what you’re doing is only going to aggravate the wound.”

“And why should I trust you?” asked Alastor angrily. “You’re the reason I’m hurt at all.”

Adam sighed. “Because if I help you, then the Princess is more likely to let me stay at the Hotel and get back up to Heaven.” he said simply. “Plus, helping people is a Winner trait.”

“Thought you didn’t believe in redemption?” said Alastor, though he did sit down.

“I don’t.” said Adam with a shrug, grabbing a small knife and moving towards Alastor to begin scraping the debris and pus off the wound. “But I’d rather be at the Hotel and it be impossible then not be at the Hotel and it be possible. Better safe than sorry, I suppose.”

Alastor shrugged. “Well, I can certainly understand doing a good thing for selfish reasons.”

Adam smiled and then looked around. “Do you have any clean needles and thread lying around this place?” he asked.

Alastor nodded and pointed to one of the cabinets. “They should be relatively clean,” he said.

Adam pursed his lips. He’d prefer completely clean when stitching up a wound, but this would work. With quick steps, he grabbed the saline, bent needle, and a spool of surgical thread. Adam wasn’t sure why Alastor was keeping such things, when he seemed so cocky. But, he supposed, it didn’t matter. What mattered was that he had it.

Carefully, Adam slid the thread into the needle and while dipping it in saline. It wasn’t clean by any stretch of the imagination, but it was as clean as he could get it, and that was a good thing. In Hell, you had to take the best you could get.

“Okay, this is going to sting.” warned Adam, passing Alastor the extra boba. “Drink this to distract yourself. Plus, you need fluids due to blood loss.”

“How do you know all this?” asked Alastor as Adam carefully stitched together the wound.

“Training with the exorcists ended in a lot of injuries, and back when I was alive, we didn’t exactly have hospitals.”

Alastor shrugged at that. “Fair enou– Agh fuck.” he said, wincing, and sucking on the Boba straw.

“Why do you even keep these if you don’t have any pain tolerance?” asked Adam, applying a bit of the saline to the wound. It was a good idea to do so, but it stung a lot. After this he needed to cauterize the wound and, quite luckily, Hell was known for being on fire.

“I keep them for my dear Husker,” said Alastor. “He has quite a few enemies from his OverLord days who try to attack him since he’s no longer an Overlord. He’s still fairly powerful, and I’m there to protect him. But he still gets hurt quite a bit.” he explained.

“Ah, and Husker is… the Winged Cat I believe?”

Alastor nodded. “Yes, he is. He was one of my best allies when he arrived in Hell. Then he gave me his soul to prevent him from losing it due to his crippling gambling addiction. Why am I sharing all this?” Alastor sounded distressed at that last part.

Adam shrugged. “People are honest when they’re in pain. It’s why people think torture works. It doesn’t of course, but the small amount of truth they get leads people to think it does.”

Now, Alastor had not been looking for an actual answer. It had been a rhetorical question. But now he knew.

“I also keep needles around for Niffty.” added Alastor.

“Ah, the bug-fucker who killed me.” Adam nodded.

“She what?” Alastor looked alarmed, and while he didn’t drop his smile, his shadow did in shock.

Adam didn’t respond, instead shrugging as he tied the thread into a knot. “Do you have anything I can use to cauterize the wound? I need something metal that I can burn to make it hot. It helps stop blood flow by burning your blood vessels.”

“But you already closed the wound?” said Alastor, eyes wide at the idea.

“You do it after closing the wound,” said Adam. “Now, do you?”

Alastor gave him the top half of his destroyed staff. “Made of metal,” he said. Adam nodded and left the radio tower. He shoved it into the nearby fire and rushed back in to press the hood of the staff into Alastor’s side.

“Drink the boba.” he said snappishly as Alastor cried out. He had no pain tolerance. Gross.

Alastor began to drink it, slurping it down. He made a surprised sound when the tapioca bubble burst in his mouth.

His distraction at drinking the new kind of food was enough for Adam to finish cauterizing the wound and apply a cool salve to his side. Or, as cool as it could be in Hell. Then he wrapped Alastor’s stomach in some bandages.

With the wound as well fixed as it could be, Adam sat back. He dusted off his hands, though there was no dust on them. “Well, that should be good,” he said with a nod. “How fast do Sinner Demons heal? Because it will need to be changed every four to five hours in general.”

Alastor shrugged. “I’ll probably be better in a couple days.”

Adam nodded at this and got up. “Did you like the boba?” he asked curiously. “It’s been a while since I’ve made it.”

“It was… adequate,” said Alastor with a slight nod.

Adam nodded calmly. “Well, be sure to change the dressing on your wound every couple hours. You probably won’t need to resew it up if you stay mostly still and don’t do anything to tear the stitches.”

With that, the First Man stood up and made to leave the decrepit radio tower.

“Wait, you’re leaving?” Alastor sounded confused. “I thought you wanted to use me to get into the Hotel?”

Adam laughed. “I do. However I also know you’re a proud and powerful motherfucker and if I’m still around when you get back your sanity, I’ll die again.”

Alastor thought about it. However, he had no argument because it was true.

“Especially since you’ll see it as me taking advantage of your vulnerable state.” Adam added. “I’ve seen your Soul File, checked everyone’s before the Extermination.”

Alastor looked greatly offended. “So why did you act like you didn’t know who I was?” he asked.

“Because I knew it would tick you off.” said Adam with a shrug. “And an angry demon is much more fun to fight. You always go so much stronger when angry or passionate about something.”

This confession made Alastor stare at him for a moment. “You’re an asshole.” he said.

“Never hidden that fact.” agreed Adam.

The two Sinners stood there, staring at each other for a moment.

“I’ll be back tomorrow.” Adam said after a tense moment. “If you will let me, I can redo your stitches and redress your wounds. If not, then tell me to leave. I can always find another way to enter the Hotel.”

Alastor remained silent as Adam left, the only indicator he was there was the dull humming of the radio static. And Adam quietly walked away, not bothering to say anything. He would return in the morning with another cup of boba. Even if Alastor turned him away, he seemed to like the boba.

As awful as Adam was, he liked when people liked what he made.

—

The next morning, Adam returned with an illegally made boba from the same shop. He knocked on the door of the Radio Tower, and Alastor’s shadow opened it. The incorporeal being wiggled at seeing him. The little jumps and glowing eyes conveyed a sense of joy, but the shadow was not Alastor. It was a shadow of him. A reflection of his existence.

Or rather the existence of who he was alive.

The shadow rushed back into the house, heading back to its owner.

“Husker?” asked Alastor, his voice much stronger and back to his normal tone.

“Regretfully not,” said Adam, entering the room.

This caused Alastor’s smile to turn sour, though it didn’t drop. Then he glanced down at the shadow. “You lied to me.”

The shadow could not speak, but it still conveyed its message clearly. It did not lie, Alastor misinterpreted.

Alastor stared at Adam for a moment. “My shadow only likes three people.” he said in annoyance. “Husker, Vox, and now you.” He did not sound happy about any of these people being on the list.

“Is it the boba?” Adam asked, giving Alastor the boba made for him. The shadow nodded happily.

“This is a different flavor.” noted Alastor as he looked at it.

“It is.” agreed Adam. Then he looked at his side. “May I…?” he trailed off, gesturing at his wound.

Alastor nodded, drinking the boba. He was like a kid, distracted easily by sweets and good treats.

With the consent of the Radio Demon, Adam knelt down and lifted the shirt. Biting his lip slightly, he ran a knife down the side of his bandages.

Beneath them the wound was very nearly healed. Sinner Healing Factors were quite incredible. If Adam were a worse person, he would love to test it. Tear their flesh apart and watch them knit their bodies back together. But, alas, for all his faults, Adam is still a good person on some level.

Plus, performing such experimentation is not something that would further his attempt at redemption.

Without so much as blinking, Adam ran his nails over the stitches.

Luckily, Alastor seemed to have put his pride, the sin that haunts all the dead in Hell, aside for long enough that his skin has healed.

“Hmm…” Adam nodded as he sat back, grasping for the bandages. The shadow, an ever helpful little creature, whisked them over to him. “I think you can go back to the Hotel within the day. Possibly around midday.”

Alastor looked quite alarmed at this. “I thought you wanted to use me to get into the Hotel?” he said.

“I do.” Adam said simply. “You are at liberty to reject me.”

At this declaration, Alastor’s shadow shook its intangible head. Then, with swift movements, it raced forward to grab Adam tightly.

“Looks like you’re coming with us.” said Alastor, annoyed at his shadow. However, for all his power, the one thing he couldn’t control was his own inner desire, the flickering shadow that revealed his truth and who he once was.

Adam smiled down at the flighty creature. “How delightful.” he muttered. “Yet how vulnerable. To have a constant show of who you truly are and feel just inches away at all moments.”

“You sound like Husker when he went on a Classical Literature kick.” muttered Alastor.

This did not seem to affect Adam all that much, and he instead stood up. “Well. I will make some more boba. Did you know they carry Tapioca Starch here in Hell?”

Alastor found out, as the two waited for the boba to be made, that Adam talked. He talked a lot. He never seemed to stop.

“I mean, you’d be surprised how hard it is to listen to any rock music when all the rock musicians are in Hell. Well, other than Queen. Queen will be in Heaven.” He said at one point.

“What’s Queen?” asked Alastor, tilting his head.

Adam looked at the Radio Demon in horror. “Only the greatest Rock Band of all time!” he said, very distressed by Alastor’s lack of knowledge of the rock scene. “Though, they were after your time I suppose.”

With that, Adam launched into a rendition of Bohemian Rhapsody, that he assured Alastor did not do the real thing justice.

“Peter went with me to Freddy Mercury’s first concert in Heaven, he’s the lead singer and the only one who’s died so far, but finding cover for the Gates was a chore and a half since the Concert was crowded as anything, and most of the competent Angels were going to the Concert as well.”

“Peter? Like St. Peter?”

“Yeah, my boyfriend.” Adam said this flippantly, as if it didn’t matter. “We managed to get Sera to cover the gates until the concert was over, she only really likes the gospel music shit that you hear at Churches.”

Alastor was annoyed at that because he happened to be a fan of the music at churches. However, Adam didn’t pause, continuing to go on about this and that. Alastor was friends with Rosie and Niffty, and even Mimzy or Charlie, and none of them talked half this much. Combined.

Alastor was thankful though, because he didn’t have much to say, and Adam’s constant talking kept any possible awkward silences at bay.

Adam paused for a moment to begin mixing the boba together, and he glanced at Alastor. “And what about you?”

“What about me?” Alastor asked.

“You weren’t listening were you?” said Adam. Alastor shook his head and Adam sighed. “Fine. Relationships. Have any memorable ones? Any crushes? Or is that… not your thing.”

Alastor shrugged. “Never really been a big relationship guy. Dated a few women, couple men I had flings with when I was younger. And then…” Alastor trailed off and frowned. His shadow, however, was doing little flips of excitement.

This intrigued Adam, who stayed quiet, as hard as it was for someone with ADHD, like him, to do. This was fun. He loved secrets. Especially from people who were closed off.

“Well, Husker and I had something for a while. Not romantic… Not yet at least. But we were a pretty powerful duo, a trio if you include Niffty, but she used to be more of a free spirit when she was an Overlord. Then Husker was losing his power too fast and he told me to take his soul, so he couldn’t lose that as well. And then it made me too uncomfortable with the power imbalance. Reminded me too much of my maman and father.”

Adam nodded. “Well, boba?” he passed Alastor another boba. “Sorry for pushing you.”

“It’s fine. It’s good to get things off my chest.” said Alastor. “Just… don’t do it again.”

Adam nodded. “Okay.” Then he started up on a constant stream of steady chatter once more.

The rest of the boba was put in a tray, like the ones you get at a coffee shop, and Adam took a mental stock of everything. The stove was off, the ingredients were put away, perishables were in the fridge… Yep, it was as good as it could be.

“Come on,” said Adam. “Time to make your grand arrival.” He gave a wink and stood up.

Alastor smiled, a real one. “Dramatic entrances are a great form of art.”

“I know,” said Adam. He was no stranger to dramatic entrances himself.

The duo made their way to the Hotel while Adam prattled on and on about how much he hated Taylor Swift.

“–And she is openly friends with people who support Ex-President Donald Trump!” said Adam indignantly. “Like, don’t get me wrong, I’m happy she’s come out and said to vote for Kamala, she holds quite a bit of sway. But she very clearly doesn’t practice what she preaches!”

“Mhm.” Alastor had no clue who any of these people were, other than Taylor Swift. Vaggie liked Taylor Swift.

“And don’t even get me started on those stupid Swifties who say she’s Michael Jackson levels of fame! She isn’t. There’s a reason it’s called Michael Jackson levels of fame. And he did that without any social media.”

Adam had a lot of opinions on the music scene.

“And don’t get me started on her winning awards for songs that she doesn’t deserve awards for. What even the fuck is Fortnight? It’s not exactly a popular song! Choosing that over Chappel Roan is a disgrace!”

“Mhm.” Alastor didn’t know what song Fortnight was either, but he knew vaguely who Chappel Roan was, because Charlie sometimes played her songs when they had group karaoke.

As they approached the Hotel, the two fell silent, staring at the newly built Hotel.

“I’ll stand off to the side.” said Adam, smiling and stepping around the Hotel to be out of view.

Alastor shook his body and let the shadows envelope him. The denizens of the Hotel, now including Cherri Bomb, were all standing outside and singing happily.

“And we’re doing it with a smile!’ Alastor sang.

All of them looked happy so see him, and crushed him in a hug.

It pleased Adam when Alastor carefully batted hands away from the part of his body that was wrapped in bandages beneath his shirt.

“Something wrong?” asked Niffty, climbing up his body to look at him.

Alastor said what he and Adam prepared on the way over. “He said I shouldn’t put too much pressure until my entire wound is fixed.”

“He?” asked Charlie, tilting her head curiously.

“Me.” responded Adam, rounding the building.

That wasn’t in the plan. Alastor shot him a look. Adam ignored it, and passed him the boba that Alastor hadn’t finished.

“Adam?” asked Lucifer, seeming to recognize him, with how similar he was back in Eden.

“In the Hell made flesh.” Adam smirked. “Boba?”

Chapter Text

Boba, apparently, worked as a peace offering.

Vaggie had missed Boba since she left Heaven, and argued they should let Adam in, at least for Boba. Charlie had backed this up, grabbing one of the boba cups and slurping it down quickly. She made an excited noise when the little bubbles burst in her mouth.

She seemed so viscerally happy about Boba that it made Adam wish he was back in Heaven. In Heaven, people didn’t get stupidly happy about dumb shit like this.

Adam sat down on one of the chairs, and Alastor stood behind him. Husk was alternating between looking worriedly at Alastor and glaring at Adam. Aww, protective little Kitty Cat. How cute.

Adam loved messing around in people’s love lives. Lute said it was a bad idea to try and control people’s lives, but Adam argued he wasn’t controlling them. He was trying to convince them to realize their feelings and acknowledge them to each other.

Wow, his talents were amazing.

Oh, shit, Lucifer was talking.

“What’d you say, I was monologuing to myself.” said Adam.

Alastor coughed out a semi-laugh, but didn’t say anything. It appeared that it only took two days for Alastor to become used to his constant talking and, well, Adam wasn’t ashamed to admit he was pleased by that.

“Right…” said Lucifer, clearly displeased. As if Adam didn’t know perfectly well that he was a brat. Don’t ask him how he knew that, he just did.

Sometimes, or a lot of the time, Adam hated his job.

“Are you paying attention?” asked Lucifer.

“No.” said Adam with a nod.

Alastor sighed. “He’s here because he wants to try for redemption, arguing he would rather redemption not work and he gave it a shot, then it does work and he never tried.”

“Yes, thank you.” Adam nodded. “What he said. I’m already on step three of my plan.”

—---—

Step Three: Enter the Hotel

“Plan?” asked Alastor.

“Yes. Befriending… kind of, you was step two in the plan.” Adam said.

This caused a few moments of silence. “Do you care to explain the plan?” asked Husk.

“No, the element of surprise.” Adam said. He paused for a moment. “Also, I’m making it up as I go.”

Charlie’s phone rang, and she picked it up. “Oh, it’s… Seraphim Emily.” she said slowly.

Vaggie scowled and crossed her arms. Adam ignored her and smiled at Charlie

She picked it up and set the phone to speaker.

“Princess Charlie!” said Emily, practically squealing with excitement.

“Hey there Em.” said Adam with a smile.

Emily froze for a few seconds, then she squealed. “Adam! Oh my Father, Lute and Peter are going to be so happy! Wait a second!”

“No, no.” said Adam. “Tell Charlie what you wanted to share.”

“Right, right.” The excitable Seraphim seemed to remember why she called. “So, redemption works, the snake guy is up here.” she said happily. “Sera’s pissed, but I called a nice Winner friend of mine, Molly, and she’s showing him around. She reminds me a little of your spider friend, so I think that’s why they get along.” Emily continued talking, but it was silent in the Hotel.

Redemption worked. Holy Fuck.

The hotel worked. Sir Pentious was in Heaven. 

Adam wanted to puke.

He couldn’t tell if it was in a good way or a bad way, or if it was because the quality of ingredients in Hell were trash and Adam wasn’t exactly following standard kitchen safety protocol.

So, he walked away. The members of the Hotel were all asking questions, and begging to talk to Pentious again, and it wasn’t his place to intrude.

He made his way over to the bar, because it was removed from the others and had nice seats.

The winged cat, Husker, Husk, whatever, walked over and stood behind the bar. “Can I get you anything?”

Adam shook his head. “Nah. I know I’m a bit of an asshole, but y’all deserve to keep the reunion semi-private.”

Husk shrugged and slid him a drink of liquor anyway.

Cherri was yelling at him in some kind of love-induced anger. About kissing her and then running off and dying.

“I’m glad he kissed her by the way. We all saw the night at the bar, it was live streamed to the Heavenly Court. Lute and I agreed that they were cute.” Adam shrugged. “He was so awkward and adorable.”

Husk chuckled. “It really was.” he agreed. Then he paused. “Alastor’s shadow likes you,” he added. “That’s pretty rare.” he sounded almost upset or jealous about it.

“Yeah, I don’t know how. But I gave Alastor boba, so that probably helped.”

“Maybe, he’s a total sucker for sweet treats, even if he’ll never admit it.”

Adam smiled. “Don’t tell anyone, but Lute is the same. A bit of ice cream and she’s the nicest person you’ll ever meet. Ironically, ice cream kind of melts her.”

Husk snorted in amusement. “Back before Al owned my soul, I took him to my casinos to gamble with him, and if it looked like I was losing, I would order the sugariest drinks or treats I could, because it always made him weaker.”

This made Adam laugh. “You manipulative bastard.” he said, though there was no venom in his voice. “No wonder Al likes you so much.”

Husk froze. “What?”

“Oh, you know, he had a crush on you, but the current power imbalance makes him feel like a dick and all that shit.” Adam frowned. “Wow, I am way drunker than I thought.” he said, giggling.

Husk was quiet when Charlie called over to him. “Hey, Emily wants to talk to you.”

Adam walked over and picked up the phone. “Hey Em.” he said, cheerful. “Nice to talk to you.”

“It’s good to talk to you as well. So, you’re a Sinner now?”

“Yep, working my way towards redemption, now that I know it works.”

“Great. Now take it off speaker phone.”

Adam frowned, but did so. Then he put the phone to his ear. “Done.”

“Adam!” yelled his boyfriend.

“Oh, hey Peter.” said Adam cheerfully.

“Don’t ‘hey Peter’ me! You died, you fucking dick!”

Peter sounded very angry, which was obvious given the yelling. “Oh, mhm, I did.” said Adam with a grave nod. “Very painful, do not recommend.”

“I have died dipshit.” Peter growled out. As amazing as his boyfriend was, he had a filthy mouth if he was mad. And that was how Adam knew that Peter was really mad. “I was crucified upside down, so shut the fuck up about this shit.”

“Right, forgot.” Adam sighed. “Listen, I’ll redeem myself eventually and see you–”

“No. You are lucky I love you, and that your boyfriend is the Gatekeeper of Heaven. Because you are coming back to Heaven within the week, redeemed or not.” There was a thump on the other side of the recording. Then Peter spoke again, but this time he was talking to someone else on his side of the phone. “Stop that! No fighting Head Seraphim yet!”

Adam winced. “Okay see you then.” he turned off the call and turned. “We have one week to redeem myself, because I’m going to Heaven whether I like it or not within the next seven days.”

“Is this because…”

“Peter can pull strings as the gatekeeper, yeah. He’s done it before. Got people who should have been Sinners sent up to Heaven. Not when they are a Sinner already, granted, but right when they die, he switches a couple wires and they pop up at the Pearly Gates.”

“That is such an abuse of power,” said Vaggie.

“Oh, don’t act like you haven’t done that Vagatha. I’ve asked for plenty of quick switches for you, more than any other exorcists. You always got attached too easily.”

“You practically begged us to do it because you thought it was hot when he exercised that control he had.”

“Yeah.” Adam agreed dreamily.

Vaggie shook her head. “Whatever. You need to sleep, it’s clear you haven’t gotten much of that done. Alastor, you and I need to have a… talk. Charlie, you too.”

Adam shrugged, and he got a key to a room. Niffty brought him upstairs, and while the bug still put him on edge, he went to his room quietly.

—---—

Step Four: Start Helping People In Any Way You Can

The next morning, Adam was seated at the table next to Lucifer and across from Alastor. Vaggie and Charlie weren’t talking much, sitting at opposite ends of the table.

“Did I miss something?” Adam asked.

“Charlie and Vaggie broke up.” explained Alastor. “Something about not having the same goals, blah blah blah. It isn’t that important.”

“Oh. Okay.” Adam stayed quiet as the people around him kept talking.

Lucifer turned to him. “So, you and Alastor seem to get along?” He sounded curious.

“Yeah, he’s a cool guy, in some ways. Plus, the guy has some major daddy issues.” he laughed. “Plus, he’s really fun to talk to, when he’s not being a dick. I really don’t get how you two don’t get along, you are so similar. Daddy issues, raging assholes with hearts of gold, sweet tooth.”

Lucifer glared at him.

Adam just smiled.

There was a knock on the door of the Hotel and everyone looked at each other.

Alastor’s shadow snaked over and opened the door, revealing a very annoyed looking Emily.

“Wow, this place sucks, no wonder you guys want redemption.” she said. She didn’t have her halo, and her hair was in a tight braid down her back. Her eyes were darker than their usual color and her dress was a simple black leather dress rather than her robes.

“Emily!” said Adam, jerking up. “Shit, what are you doing here? Please tell me you didn’t fall?” He doesn’t know if he could handle another Angel he was close to falling.

Emily shook her head. “Nah. I came down here to watch over your dumb ass and make sure this Hotel shtick is up to Heaven’s code, yada yada yada. I dunno, Sera went on and on about it, but I was mostly ignoring them.”

“Of course you were.” Adam sighed. “Okay, fine.”

Emily entered the Hotel and waved to everyone. “Hey guys. Umm, Angel, you wanted to know what Molly looked like, right?”

Angel nodded. Emily smiled and pulled out a picture.

Angel looked at the photo for all of five seconds before sobbing.

Adam and Emily looked at each other.

“Is something wrong?” Charri asked.

“It’s my sister,” Angel said. “You know, I always wondered how I never found her down here, but she’s a Winner.” he laughed slightly.

“Oh, I think she was one of the ones that Vaggie asked me to pull the strings for.” noted Adam, thinking back.

Vaggie looked over. “Oh, yeah, I did.” she recalled. “She looked so hurt crying over your body, and she was sobbing hysterically, and I wanted to comfort her so badly. So when she hung herself later that day, Peter brought her up to Heaven instead of down here.”

Angel looked simultaneously distraught that Molly hung herself, and amused. “Figures. We were born on the same day and we died on the same day.”

“Do you want to talk to her?” asked Emily.

“Sure?” Angel seemed confused.

Emily smiled and waved her hand. A portal opened up, and a gorgeous Spider Sinner walked out.

“Hello?” she said with a tight smile.

As they talked, Molly thanked Vaggie for letting her into Heaven, but she would have preferred to see her brother, and Lucifer and Alastor stepped back.

Adam was tired of the reunion, and turned to subtly spy on them. Husk did the same.

“Look, I’m sorry for being a dick to you.” Lucifer said, looking down slightly. Adam would never understand how the insecure brat was the Sin of Pride, but he didn’t have the energy to speculate on it.

Alastor was silent for a moment, then his Shadow shoved him. The creature’s encouragement made the Radio Demon sigh. “You reminded me… so much of my father, and I hated it. The way you treated Charlie? Ignoring her unless you need something, not believing in her plan… Charlie is a good person, and you were not a good father. So I was mad.”

Lucifer nodded. “Well, I’m sorry your dad sucked, but I am trying my best.”

“Your best isn’t good enough. Not yet.” said Alastor simply.

Their attention was drawn back to the other group as there were some shocked gasps and a couple cheers.

Spinning around, the four were confronted with Molly holding Vaggie’s shirt front and kissing her deeply. Vaggie looked alarmed, but also happy and pleased.

“I can’t believe my sista’s got a girlfriend!” said Angel, leaning in.

Emily was clapping. “Oh, you two are so cute!” she said. “Congrats Moll’s.”

Charlie sniffled, seeming caught between being upset her ex moved on in less than 24 hours, and being happy for Vaggie. “Congrats.” she said, choked up. Then she left the room. Emily, the sweet thing she was, ran after her.

Adam ignored it, and instead looked at the others. “Well. Alastor, would you like to lead bonding activities? Or would our dear Vaggie like to?”

Vaggie shrugged. “I’ll lead.” she said with a nod.

“Hey, why didn’t Pen come?” asked Cherri, biting her lip slightly.

Molly smiled. “He’s working to get his ex-wife and son and reconcile with them, and get ready to see you again, he hasn’t forgotten.”

“Ex-wife…” Charri trailed off. “Oh…”

“Don’t worry, she’s remarried in Heaven.” assured Molly. “They are not into each other anymore. He’s definitely not, if how much he talks about you is any indication. It’s just a matter of closure.”

“Now.” Molly spun around to look at Angel, a terrifying look in her eyes. “Care to explain why you’re a porn star?”

Adam left as Molly went on a protective older sister rage at him. Most of the group did as well, except for Vaggie, who was watching Molly with a loving look. Figures the ex-orcist would be into an ex-mafia girl. No matter how long she was an Angel, the mafia and its violence ran in her blood.

Heh. Ex-orcist. Adam would have to run that by Lute later, it was hilarious.

Adam shrugged as he walked up the stairs. He didn’t need to help them.

Alastor was sitting in his room, led there by Husk. Adam looked in. He wanted to make sure they weren’t doing anything that might… reagitate the wound, wink wink.

Alastor had his shirt off, and was gesturing to the spot the wound was. “–me Husk. He isn’t going to hurt us. He’s doing good things.”

“But is it really him doing a good thing if he’s only doing it so he gets redeemed.” argued Husk.

Alastor huffed. “He’s still doing good, regardless of why. The Orphans don’t care why you donated the money, just that you did.”

“… What?”

“It’s a story that Adam shared during his rambling. He does that a lot. You have no idea how much he talks.”

“I have some idea.”

“No, you’re lowballing it. It’s kind of nice to be honest, I don’t have to do any real talking.”

Husk hummed. “Can you tell Shadow to…”

“I can’t control it.” said Alastor, annoyed. Adam could just barely see that the Shadow was playing with Husk’s fur and running its hands through his wings.

“You can ask.”

“It listens to Vox more than it listens to me.”

Hell wasn’t all bad, especially for Overlords. But there were things that made it punishment, and one of Alastor’s was his Shadow basically never listening to him.

“Adam’s on the list now?” asked Husk, calming down at the Shadow’s ministrations. “So far it’s only been… romantic partners.” he sounded vaguely jealous.

Alastor chuckled. “No. It just likes that Adam helped us and got attached. Plus, you know it likes when someone knocks me down a peg.”

“Hmmm, true.” Husk was smiling. “You know, he told me the weirdest thing,” said Husk.

Adam figured he was no longer needed. He left the two alone.

Lucifer’s room was nearby, and Adam stepped in. He was working on making an Alastor themed rubber duck. It was odd, but based on the piles of rubber ducks with the designs themed after various tenants of the Hotel, it seemed to be a compliment. Especially with the amount of Charlie themed ones.

“Hey Lucifer,” said Adam.

Lucifer spun around. “Oh, hi Adam.” he said.

“Hi.” Adam stared at him.

“Hi.”

They stood together in awkward silence for a moment.

“Lilith is in Heaven.” said Adam after a moment. “I figured you should know.”

Lucifer looked at him. “She is?”

It was quiet for a moment. “Yeah. She is. She made a deal for the right to stay on Heaven’s beaches and been there for about seven years. I don’t know what the deal entailed, but…”

Lucifer sighed and leaned down, putting his hands on the desk, leaning forward. “Fuck.”

“Sorry.” Adam made to walk out of the room.

“Stay.” said Lucifer, pointing to one of the chairs scattered throughout the room. “Please.”

Adam nodded and sat down in the seat.

“I’m sorry for what I said during the fight. About how your wives liked me better.”

Adam shrugged. “I can’t blame Lilith. We were too similar. Like puzzle pieces, we couldn’t click if we were the same. I won’t pretend it didn’t hurt, because it was the first time anything… bad had happened to me, and by the two people I trusted the most.”

“And Eve? I know you two are divorced?”

“Yeah, but not unhappily.” Adam shrugged. “She wanted to experience something new. So we divorced. I love her still, but it’s not romantic. I really couldn’t care less if you had hooked up with her.” Not anymore at least, but Adam didn’t say that.

“I never did.”

“I know.”

—---—

Adam had, somehow, become the mediator between Alastor and Lucifer. He wasn’t sure why. But he wanted to do some good, and he needed to do this. Charlie specifically asked him, and he knew his ability to stay stood on an unwinding thread.

“We’re watching the Parent Trap,” said Adam. “And we are going to bitch about the stupid plot and the ridiculousness of the Divorce Court System, because it’s stupid.”

“What’s it about?” asked Alastor. Adam didn’t respond.

Parent Trap isn’t a movie he particularly likes. It’s dumb, and he doesn’t like any of the characters. But Lindsey Lohan is iconic and it’s a classic. People know it.

And it’s clear the two men enjoy it on some level. They don’t like it, but they laugh, and they bitch with Adam.

“So they just didn’t notice it wasn't their child. Shitty parents.” said Lucifer with a huff.

Alastor hummed, and his shadow shrugged. “Just a few months ago, I would have argued that you wouldn’t have noticed Charlie getting replaced by an identical twin.”

Lucifer frowned. “I know I was kinda distant, but I do know my daughter.”

“My father said the same about me, and look where I am now!” said Alastor, rolling his eyes.

Adam, recognizing that there was about to be an emotionally charged moment, turned down the volume, but he let the movie keep running. In case it got awkward.

“He was distant, but he knew me.” Tears started to slip from Alastor’s eyes, the tracks they made in his fur framing his forever etched smile, carved into his face. Carved there by a lifetime of grin and bear it, the two other men now realized. “He knew me in ways that a father should not know his son.”

Lucifer held out a hand hesitantly, and then placed it on Alastor’s shoulder. Alastor didn’t flinch away, so Lucifer moved closer and continued to rub his back.

“I’m sorry.” he whispered softly.

“He always said that he was… fixing me.” Alastor sniffled. “That God had given him a child where it took away his first, and that I was a punishment. That what he was doing was God’s will to make me a good kid, a good boy. A child of God. He said that Abraham had sacrificed his own son to prove his devotion, and he would do the same.”

Lucifer winced and continued to rub small circles on Alastor’s back. Husk, seeming to sense something was wrong, poked his head in, but Alastor’s shadow waved him away. This was between Alastor and Lucifer. They needed this.

“I’m sorry,” said Lucifer again.

“So I figured, if God created me to be used by my father, as an eternal punishment for him, then I would simply go to the Devil. I killed him, and I couldn’t stop. I kept killing, and I ate their bodies. And then I came to Hell and you were just as bad as he was, and I realized I was never good enough. I was forever the Issac, a sacrificial lamb to him. Someone to cleanse him of his sins.”

“The story of Abraham.” said Adam after a moment of silence. “Is often misconstrued. The story isn’t about a man who believed in God so much he was willing to sacrifice his son, it’s the story of a man with blind faith to the point of his own destruction.”

Alastor looked at him. “Huh?”

“Christians often get the story wrong, but Judaism tells the story mostly properly. The true ending of the story is that God comes to Abraham and tells him he failed. It was a test, because your family should come before God. Abraham was supposed to refuse God and say his son was more important than his faith. But he failed. Depending on the story, sometimes an Angel comes to stop Abraham from killing Issac and says the equivalent of ‘Some voice claiming to be God told you to kill your son and you didn’t even question it?’ but regardless of the context, the point of the story is family over faith. Abraham failed and so did your father.”

Then Adam got up and left the room.

He didn’t need to be there for what was coming next.

Besides, Hell had the Good Place on streaming and he was in the mood for some theological discussions of whether you can truly be good under a capitalistic society.

Even if he knew the answer, it was a great show.

Plus, coming up with personal hells for characters from other series was super fun.

He sat in the room assigned to him and picked up the remote. He flicked through the options before finding the Good Place. VoxFlix had disappointing selections, but at least it had the ability to use a VPN. After connecting to a VPN, it was easy enough to connect to the United States and turn on the Good Place.

Alastor came to his room around the end of episode three, and he sat down on the bed as well.

Adam restarted the show for him, and the two sat in a comfortable silence.

“This ‘Good Place’ doesn’t sound great,” said Alastor thoughtfully after a while. “Seems pretty bad if so many horrible people got there.”

Adam shrugged. “Miscalculations happen in this universe,” he said. They did, just not in the way he was implying. “They happen in any corporate setting.” He couldn’t let Alastor figure out the plot twist too early on. Gaslighting the hell about plot twists was half the fun of introducing someone to a show you like.

After a couple more episodes, Alastor sighed. “Me and Lucifer worked it out. I think he’s trying to track down my dad in Hell to see if he can kill him for real with one of the Angelic weapons.” he commented.

“He does have that Protective Dad Aura about him.” agreed Adam with a small smile. “I remember, back before Lilith, he was always begging us to have kids, because he would be the best uncle they had ever met.”

“Wouldn’t he have been their only uncle?”

Adam looked at Alastor disapprovingly. “There were other Angels you know,” he said dryly. “What do you think the Sins were doing before the Fall? Or the Ars Goetia? Granted, most modern Ars Goetia aren’t pure blooded anymore, but the point still stands that they are angels.”

The unexpected, but should have been expected, rant made Alastor nod weakly. He was honestly kinda tired. He had stayed up all night the night prior because he was trying to keep Adam’s hard work on fixing him up wouldn’t go to waste. Did Adam cause the injury in the first place? Yes. But even Alastor’s insane pride could admit that Adam saved him.

Dying normally wasn’t bad, per se, for a Sinner. They didn’t die forever, especially since he didn’t technically get hit by an Angelic Weapon. But it still sucked. It was painful, it tended to cause you to lose some control for a while, it took a while to be returned back to normal, or even come back in the slightest amount.

It was more convenient to simply not die.

With this in mind, Alastor continued to watch the show with Adam.

Then, Adam spoke again. “So, did you and Husker have a conversation about your feelings?”

Alastor’s face barely betrayed his surprise, but his shadow was wiggly and happy that he had asked.

“No.” said Alastor, though his shadow gave away that it was a lie.

“Congrats bitch.” Adam bumped his shoulder with a smile. “You… no, actually. You don’t deserve it, but it’s not always a bad thing if you get better than you deserve. Sometimes it is. But not always. You need to take advantage when you get better than you deserve.” Adam knew that plenty well.

“Hmmm.” Alastor nodded slightly. “I guess.”

Adam smiled and bumped his shoulder. “Hey, I’m proud of you. It takes a lot of mental strength to put aside your pride and confess.”

Alastor rolled his eyes. “Please. You told him.”

“Did I? That doesn’t sound like something I’d do.” Adam laughed at Alastor’s annoyed face, and turned slightly, pausing the show. “How much you wanna bet that Emily and Charlie are dating by the time I go back up to Heaven.”

“I bet by tomorrow to be honest,” said Alastor thoughtfully.

“No, Charlie just got broken up with, and neither she nor Emily would want to make the other uncomfortable by confessing to someone who isn’t interested in them.” Adam argued.

“Good point.” said Alastor, nodding in agreement. “But what makes you think Charlie wouldn’t confess?”

“Well, Angel’s aren’t created with emotions. They have to learn them. And, it stands to reason that the Angel created to replace Lucifer, well, she was created right after he fell, but in a different rank so… would have a harder time learning romantic love, especially considering she’d have never experienced it before. I think even Charlie would know that.” started Adam, shrugging as he spoke. “And Emily won’t confess because Charlie just got broken up with by her long term girlfriend.”

“Damnation, you’re right.” muttered Alastor. “So you’re saying we need to–”

“Meddle in their personal love lives? Yes, very much so.” Adam smirked.

“We need other allies to get this to work out. You talk to Vaggie, I’ll talk to Husk. They’re our best bets for this.”

“Why?”

“Husk loves to meddle, and Vaggie still wants the best for Charlie no doubt.” Alastor explained, twisting his hands to summon the shadow to his side.

“Fair enough.” Addam sighed. “But I was asking why I had to talk to Vaggie? We don’t exactly… get along.”

Alastor sighed as though the answer was obvious. “She still respects you and looks up to you. She was literally created from you and was trained and raised by you. She might not always get along with you guys, but she still deeply respects you.”

With their plan made, the duo made their way to their respective targets. They had work to do.

Vaggie and Molly were sitting together in Vaggie’s room, watching a movie. It was a shitty romcom, some Hallmark movie. Vaggie had always liked watching them, though it was mostly because they were very fun when drunk or making fun of them.

“Vaggie?” Adam asked, entering the room.

“What?” she asked. She seemed annoyed.

“Emily and Charlie, they like-like each other, right?”

“What are you, a middle schooler? Who says like-like anymore?” the ex-orcist snarked. “But yeah, they definitely do.”

“But neither are going to act on it because they both feel like confession will be crossing an invisible line?”

“Obviously. What does this have to do with me?”

“We’re going to meddle and get them together, and I was given the job of convincing you.” he said flatly.

Molly and Vaggie looked at each other, having their silent lesbian communication.

“We’ll help,” said Vaggie. She got up and made her way to her desk, grabbing some items she might need.

Meanwhile, Molly got up. “I’ll go get Tony to help.” she said with a smile.

“Thank Moll.” said Adam with a nod.

Almost twenty minutes later, everyone in the Hotel, sans Emily and Charlie, were in Alastor’s room.

“What’ssss the game plan?” asked Sir Pentious, leaning against Cherri. Cherri was smiling as she leaned up against the new Winner as well.

“We can fake a confession letter from each of them?” offered Angel, frowning. He was playing with Husk’s wings, the cat demon sitting next to Alastor.

“Too messy, and it’s likely they’d figure it out.” pointed out Molly. “We can lock them in a closet until they both confess?”

“Both can teleport.” Vaggie said, waving her hand slightly. “They don’t do it often, but they can.”

The room was quiet for a moment. Then, Adam snapped his fingers. “I’ve got it.”

“Oh?” They all looked at him.

“You know the trope where one person confesses something and their love interest is right behind them listening to them, but the Main Character doesn’t know?” he explained.

“You think that would work?” asked Alastor.

“Yes, and here’s how…”

—---—

Step Five: Help Other People For No Reason Other Than Their Happiness

The next morning, Charlie and Alastor were downstairs first. Alastor was cooking breakfast, and Charlie came in behind him.
“Hey Al.” she said with a small yawn.

“You’re up early?” commented Alastor, stirring the pancake mix.

Charlie shrugged. “Yeah, well, that happens sometimes.” she said, yawning again.

“Hmmm.” Alastor nodded slightly and started to pour the batter into the pan. “I’m always here to listen.”

Charlie hesitated, then sighed. “I… I’m a horrible person. I have feelings for someone who can never reciprocate. And I can't tell them, but it’s burning me up inside not sharing.”

Alastor looked over her shoulder, where Emily and Vaggie were coming down the stairs. Since Angels didn’t need sleep like normal souls did, she was probably just waiting for someone to show her downstairs at an appropriate time.

Vaggie caught his eye and winked, while Husk ambled into the kitchen, and kissed Alastor softly.

“Never say never kid.” said Husk with a small smile. “You never know after all. Al thought I didn't like him.”

“But that’s different.” said Charlie with a sigh. “You can both feel emotions. Angels can’t. They’re born, created, whatever, without emotions and have to learn the feeling. Dad always told me I was lucky I was born with my human half’s ability to learn emotions.”

“So who do you like?” Adam asked. He walked into the kitchen and pulled out some bacon to start making. “I hope it’s not me, because I’m sorry, but I don't like you like that.” Out in the dining room, he could see Emily stiffen slightly at the question.

Charlie laughed slightly. “No, umm, it’s not you.”

“I know. I’m just teasing you. It’s Emily, right?”

Charlie sighed. “Yeah. It is. It sucks cause she’s so nice, but she doesn’t exactly know what love is.”

“Yes I do.” said Emily, marching into the kitchen. “I know what love is, and not general all encompassing love, but pure love for you. Charlie Morningstar, Princess of Hell, daughter of Lucifer and Lilith, I am romantically and sexually attracted to you.”

Charlie stared at her. “Why didn’t you say anything?” she asked.

“You’d just gotten out of a five year relationship, it didn’t seem like the time.” Emily explained, shrugging. Her grey skin was flushed with a golden blush as she looked at Charlie.

“Idiot.” muttered Charlie. Then she leaned in and kissed Emily. Emily made a surprised sound, but her eyes closed in delight when she registered what was happening. “Me and Vaggie’s relationship was basically non-existent by the end, we were essentially friends who kissed and had sex sometimes. It’s why she moved on so fast. And why you should have made a move.”

“It’s true,” said Vaggie cheerfully. “Good job.” She moved in and hugged Emily, then Charlie.

“I can’t believe I’m the only single one!” complained Angel dramatically, but he high fived the two anyway.

“I think it’s best for you to learn to value yourself outside of your sexuality before getting in a relationship.” said Charlie with a smile. “We’ve gotten past you making everything sexual. Now onto helping you understand that people cherish you for more than your sex.”

Angel grumbled playfully. He agreed, but still. It was the principal of the matter. He had to complain. It was his job.

“Don’t worry, I've got a plethora of awesome Winners once you make your way up.” said Adam with a smile.

Chapter Text

Step Six: Profit???

Adam, Emily, and Molly left the Hotel in the dead of Night.

Hell was still active, because even with the exterminations, there are still many people in Pentagram City.

The trio of Angels, well, two Angels and one ex-Angel Sinner, sit outside the Hotel and staring up at the sky.

The Pentagram in the sky glows sullenly, darker than usual, a mockery of the moon. It will burn all the brighter in the day, the closest thing to a Sun that Hell has.

A long clanging sound echoed through the cavernous reigns of Hell. 12 long sounds echoed through the night, and Adam took a deep breath.

“You ready?” asked Molly, her wings fluttering slightly as she twisted her lower hands together.

“Yeah.” said Adam. “Are you sure you don’t want to stay with Anthony for longer?”

Molly shook her head. “Nah. He’ll join me up in Heaven soon enough.” she said with a small shrug, her hair falling automatically back into place. “I know it.”
The portal opened in front of him. Standing beside Peter, was Adam’s first some, Abel. He was standing there waving at Adam and Emily. And Molly, but he didn’t know her all that well.

“Wanna watch The Good Place?” asked Emily as she walked into the portal, Adam following behind her, feeling his body spasm and mold back into his Winner form.

“Sure.”

~~~

—---—

Step Seven: Dramatic Monologue while you Explain the Follow Up

Life went back to a certain status quo after that.

Sera wasn’t happy with Adam skipping right back up to heaven, but given that Sir Pentious was in Heaven now, people stopped caring pretty quick.

Sir Pentious was much more impressive.

The Living Exorcists were thrilled to see him, glad they didn’t have to mourn their commander alongside all their sisters. Lute and Thea, his right hand and her girlfriend, another exorcist, were at the front of the crowd welcoming him.

Charlie stayed in touch with Emily. Of course, the two of them met up at the Emissary all the time, happy and in love.

Vaggie and Molly kept in touch as well, though Vaggie preferred to stay at the Hotel, doubling down on redeeming people. Especially Anthony, for Molly.

Charlie was thrilled Vaggie was finally taking the dream seriously, and now that the two were broken up, they were actually closer than ever as best friends.

“Monologuing again?” asked Lute, making her way over to Adam.

“Yeah.” he turned away from the window he was staring out of.

“Any good?” she asked, flexing her wings happily, bionic arm reading a series of values.

“I’d say so.”

Lute laughed, her dress, a simple non-exorcism dress, since the whole no more exterminations thing, was swaying slightly. “Well, stop that. We have a… quadruple date to get to.” the date was Adam, Lute, Emily and Molly meeting up with their respective partners. It wasn’t really a date, since it was technically a meeting between the four Angels, but their partners were coming along, so Lute said calling it that was funny.

“Excessive.” Adam said. But he got up, running a hand through his hair, forgoing his mask.

He did have a quadruple date to get to.