Archive of Our Own ^beta

 

Today is the day. Even in his sleep, Declan's fists are clenched tightly, as if he would punch him if he woke him up one more time. His fists are as big as he is strong. Benjamin gave him up and went to wash up first. He advised him not to have morning classes if he wasn't sure he could attend, but Declan didn't even pretend to listen, saying Ben was ignoring him. In Benjamin's opinion, Declan had a tendency to be blindly trusting of himself.

 

SHIT. Today is another shitty day. Benjamin crumpled his face. He has a jinx: if he didn't like the way the toothpaste squeezed when he brushed his teeth, it was a bad day. Declan always laughed at it. "Who care about that jinx? You're the perfect candidate to be culled from the modern world!" he thought, remembering Declan's chuckle. That's wrong.

He's just a reasonable guy who loves modern science and jinxes are just that, and Declan Rice is just an asshole who doesn't respect that small but deadly part of Benjamin. And when Declan's wronged, he defends himself by saying that he's just the cute youngest kid at home and that he's a delicate guy.

 

Benjamin got cussed out for being nice. It's all because of the toothpaste. Declan ignored the advice to squeeze the toothpaste from the bottom. So Benjamin left him alone and left the house.

 

The morning class is 'Culture with Architecture'. Benjamin don't like the class, which consisted of a PPT showing pictures of architecture the whole time. He is in it with Declan. Declan had already ruined that class. In the quiz they took the other day, Benjamin saw Declan name Emirates Stadium for a question about telling them about the beautiful old London architecture. He didn't mean to look, but the answer was so ridiculous that Benjamin couldn't help but giggle. The professor always asks similar questions, and Benjamin advised him to just answer St. Paul's Cathedral or the Tower of London because it was a given, but Declan wouldn't listen. If he'd answered Highbury, the word 'old' would have been appropriate, but Emirates Stadium wouldn't have gotten the right marks.

 

"Um..."

 

Benjamin was walking diligently to lecture room when he suddenly stopped. He hasn't eaten breakfast because he's been arguing since morning. He don't mind starving, but the class is long. He grabbed a chicken wrap and ate it, thinking to himself. Declan is really screwed. Come to think of it, the professor is a Tottenham fan.

 

Benjamin White is from Bournemouth. Declan Rice, who lives with him, is a Londoner. When he decided to go to London instead of Bournemouth University, his father, who was usually a man of few words, advised him: "Beware of the Londoners. You have to watch out for the Londoners. And London is cold and rainy. There are no beaches, no seagulls."

 

His father is mostly right. London is gray, cold, and rainy, and there are no beaches, but seagulls live along the Thames.

 

But that is the most important thing. His father had told him to watch out for the Londoners, and Declan Rice, the London Boy, is his boyfriend.

 

*

 

They love football. Of course, most European men love dogs and football. Declan is convinced that all good, real men love football. Benjamin White disagree. Declan would be appalled if he knew, but he should have known that there are some Brits who don't watch local football, big club games, or even the national team. His dad don't watch football, but he is a pretty cool guy, and Declan's long-winded rant about football and cool guys annoyed Benjamin a little. He felt like his dad is being criticized by someone he don't care about.

 

In fact, they have very little in common. It is like... would you never introduce me to someone even if you had a common acquaintance? Declan hates housekeeping, keeps dancing while listening to ridiculous music, and hangs tissues upside down on the toilet paper rack. Once Benjamin had done the dishes, Declan would come up behind him and turn all the mugs with the handles backwards. He insisted that the pattern looked better that way. Thanks to this, more than a few times, Benjamin almost broke the cup as he took it out. Of course, Declan was the one who broke more cups, so they've been using plastic cups for cold water lately.

 

Declan's room air freshener smells like woods, and Benjamin's smells like soap. Naturally, neither of them used air fresheners at first, because they were cool. Declan was the first to start using air fresheners, and Benjamin was convinced it was because he didn't ventilate well. They have different favorite colors, different ways of socializing, different styles of dressing, and different hobbies. The only things they have in common are dogs and football. Football, Football, and Arsenal.

 

 

In any case, the stalling process moved at an alarming pace. Benjamin White's account, which had few followers and was never allowed to be tagged, was quickly robbed. Declan's blue eyes sparkled at the feed, which had grown by just one person.

 

*

 

In any case, London is too big and complicated. Even though it is only two hours away from home and he'd been visiting since he was a kid, Benjamin still often got lost in the city. But he is British, after all, and finding his way back to college or home is as easy as the flip of a palm. It isn't the directions that are difficult, it is the immediate situation.

 

His mother called often, and she always ended by saying that Benjamin is doing well. This is not surprising, because Benjamin White is indeed a good son who did well in school and studied hard. Because of his tall stature and many accessories and tattoos, people who met him for the first time often avoided him. This prejudice was soon broken brilliantly, but that didn't make people any nicer to him.

 

Now Declan Rice fell asleep during the movie. Benjamin told him it would be boring for you, but Declan insisted he could watch it all the way through. Benjamin was a little depressed when he realized that his boyfriend hadn't even seen the passionate love scene. What Benjamin White got from London: big-city experience, a degree, and a Londoner boyfriend.

 

If someone ask him when he started dating a guy, he can't answer. There are some things in life that are inevitable. It is like Declan always falling asleep while watching a classic movie.

 

*

 

 

In about 10 minutes of walking out of the lecture hall, Declan Rice has greeted about 20 people and Benjamin next to him is completely lost. So here's what happens. Declan says hello to about a hundred people and they're happy to see him. In fact, not everyone is going to like him. Statistically, probably half of them don't. But half of a hundred is fifty, so that's already about five times the number of relationships Benjamin wants to have. He's constantly trying to tag him on Instagram and introduce him to everyone he thinks he knows, but Benjamin doesn't like any of it... so... if you had to recall the not-so-pleasant past, it went something like this.

 

 

Brag. Declan was taking Benjamin for a beer after finishing the assignment. Benjamin didn't understand what the hell he was doing with this guy. But he figured if he gave it a few more days, he'd never have to see that bloke again. Benjamin will block RICE's phone number, he will block RICE's Instagram, so Declan Rice will be basically erased from Ben White's life. (Not completely. Their mutual acquaintances had grown in the meantime, and Benjamin was prepared to block everyone if necessary. Sorry, Aaron.)

 

Benjamin was silent for a moment. The pub was noisy and the beer was tasteless. On the TV on the wall, Arsenal players were repeating their passes. Hurry up and hit the goal with the set piece! He tried to turn his attention back to the football, but for some reason he couldn't think of anything to say. In fact, Benjamin's head had been hurting all semester from a love affair. Not that it was Declan's fault, of course, but he is angry with Declan.

 

 

 

Benjamin glanced at Declan's back for a moment. He looked helpless, his pleas rejected. But Declan is soon caught by someone, chatting away. They don't really fit together.

 

Maybe they both seemed fine that day, but they were really drunk. Declan swears by his dog Raffa, that he was never drunk and didn't know Benjamin was gay. Raffa, a brown poodle, was incredibly cute, so Benjamin had no choice but to believe him. When someone swears by their dog, you have to believe them. No one wants to lose such a cute dog.

 

It wasn't a ticklish ritual, but when he woke up, this is what happened. Declan Rice's daringness, his ridiculousness, his blindness to a situation that could have been horrible if Benjamin had been straight or worse. Declan is very, very different from Benjamin. He is very much different from Benjamin, who has yet to tell his mother. There's a distance between him and Benjamin that's far greater than the distance between London and Bournemouth. But there's something reassuring about his confidence.

 

*

 

 

The day Declan Rice and Benjamin White finally found the bugs in their home, they were very angry and fought very hard, but for different reasons. The giant bug disappeared quickly. It looked like a cockroach, but as Declan comforted himself to the idea that it might be a cricket or some kind of lucky spider, Benjamin confirmed that it was indeed a cockroach. The only good news was that its enormous size suggested that it was a male that had come in from outside in search of a female. Or, given the situation in this house, maybe it was a male looking for another male.

 

Benjamin is a picky eater. He often ate some snacks and left them in the house, an oddly uncorrectable habit for a man who is so keen on cleaning and ventilation. That doesn't happen with Declan. He ate up the whole bag. Of course, their house is never dirty, thanks to Benjamin's obsession with cleaning, but when a bug appeared or a spider spins a web in the corner, Benjamin would stop cleaning and wait for Declan.

 

It was in the living room that Benjamin, who hadn't slept through the night (Declan had slept soundly), found the cockroach again. The bug had crawled out of a bag of chips that Benjamin had left behind. Benjamin quietly ducked onto the couch. Like the jinx of squeezing toothpaste, the bug is one of his weak points. Declan caught it. With Benjamin's book.

 

 

 

 

 

 

*

 

 

And now, with all of Declan's activity and many followers, Benjamin has a moment of gratitude. He had just discovered that people could see who had visited them on Instagram. Declan Rice's Instagram visit history: Benjamin White. Wow, that's horrifying to think about. But with so many people looking at his Instagram, Benjamin's name was going to get pushed to the bottom of the list.

 

 

 

People don't doubt Declan. They don't misunderstand him. He's loud, he's boisterous, he has a lot of friends, and he looks straight man to anyone who's ever seen him. Living with and dating a man isn't a bad thing, but whatever. No one would think anything wrong if Declan's amazing feed included the meals, coffees, beers, and Arsenal scores he and Benjamin did together. Every time Declan tries to say 'something' to someone, Benjamin shuts him up and he's quieted down. And... everything is fine.

 

 

 

*

 

Benjamin had been up and around outside since morning, so he pulled on a warm jacket. Today he had no classes in the morning. Despite the fact that the house was still haunted by the spirit of the bug, and he'd decided to go to the library early to check out books and study. Declan is curled up on the couch, looking at something intently. Instagram, he guess. The weather is indeed chilly, and he could see the poorly dressed people huddled against the cold, and he is quite proud of himself

 

 

 

 

*

 

Declan Rice, frantically searching for the Kalvin in question, drifted off to sleep. It was exactly 11:38 when he woke up. It was a unclear time indeed. He'd originally woken up at 27 minutes, but the time had made him decide to sleep for just three more minutes, and by the time he'd gotten up, 11 minutes had already passed. Two more minutes... He blinked his eyes. The poster of Frank Lampard on the ceiling smiled at him. Ah, Frank... Unlike his father, he's on his way to Arsenal now, but Lampard is hot anyway. He's really good at football. Declan should score a lot of goals. He glanced at his phone again. Shit. It's 11:42.

 

The day isn't too cold. It is enough for a proper long-sleeved shirt. After putting on his shoes, Declan checked his texts from Benjamin again. He winced a little when he saw that it's cold and he should dress warmly. But the sneakers he's wearing today are very uncomfortable to put on and take off. So he decided to ignore Benjamin's text. [ex]. The answer to his desperate question about Kalvin was so simple that it was a good reason.

 

Declan left the house even though he had no classes because they didn't have anything for dinner. And there was also a promise to bring curry. It's Benjamin's favorite foods. 

 

Declan cooks simple meals, take out the trash, catches bugs, and do the laundry. When he think about it, it is very unfair that he is treated like he is playing and eating just because he don't like washing and cleaning. It's frustrating that washing dishes and cleaning are the main aces of a household. 

 

Walking through the grocery store, Declan suddenly frowned. The word 'big clean' came to mind. Big clean... He was always amazed at how Benjamin White came up with such annoying things.

 

 

 

*

 

Martin Odegaard is at a loss as to how to handle this situation. If they'd rather fight, throw punches, or roll around like they usually do, He'd kick them out of the house. But this weird, chilly undercurrent is so... refined to them. The gay couple who moved in and asked to borrow a hammer were smashing up his peaceful life every other day.

 

 

Ben White, the quiet, pretty one who held out a cookie set and asked to borrow a hammer, and Declan Rice, the bigger, handsome, affable one. It's a bad thing to prejudge people based on nationality, but Declan was a little too rowdy for the Englishmen he'd known. And being a Nordic, Martin didn't want to invade his neighbors' privacy too much after receiving the cookie set and lending them his hammer, but,

 

 

Anyway, Martin Odegaard is in a quandary. Unlike most situations where he and Benjamin could just bash Declan and be done with it, today they both seemed to be at fault. What about Emily, what about Kalvin... what about the ventilation, what about the cockroache, what about the library. And right now, Benjamin is a little pissed off at Martin, too.

 

 

 

 

 

 

*

 

 

 

It's the weekend they bought the ping-pong table, and it was heavier than they expected, so they ordered delivery. Benjamin was suspicious of Declan's silence for a moment, expecting him to be his usual rambunctious self about how unreasonable it was to have to wait for a table over the weekend, but soon read the book quietly while watching him immersed in the game. The crowd on the monitor cheering every time Declan scored a goal was very annoying to him. Benjamin asked Declan to turn the volume down, but he didn't even respond. Declan insisted that he needs the crowd cheering when he scored a goal with Kai Havertz, a player he had spent a a hefty transfer fee. Looking at his hunched back, Benjamin realized it would be wiser to kick him out of the house, because even when he closed the door behind Declan, he could still hear the crowd at the game shouting.

 

 

 

 

*

 

Martin Odegaard never knows when Declan Rice would walk into the his house and find him sitting on the couch, puffy-faced and chewing on a snack, a turron that Martin had bought with great care in a Spanish shop. Benjamin and Declan had been worried lately that he seemed to have a screw loose somewhere, and Martin knew it was a very serious situation to be worried by them, not by anyone else, that he was losing his mind. He doesn't remember answering the door, so it must have been unlocked, but it's still a little odd to barge in and sit on the couch. Still, Martin quietly scoops up water for Declan, who is choking on it because it's too sweet.

 

 

Declan is clearly in a bad mood. According to him, he was playing quietly, implementing Arsenal's powerful set pieces, when suddenly Benjamin started interrogating him. "I couldn't believe how bad it felt to be suddenly accused of doing something wrong. Of course, I did... do something wrong." Declan is under tremendous pressure for having erased a message on Benjamin's phone a few days ago.

 

It wasn't intentional. Benjamin's phone rang while he was washing up, and without thinking, Declan checked it, and then accidentally deleted it when he saw the message. He knows it's wrong, but he dosen't want Benjamin to know that the message from his ex-boyfriend, who wants to see him. Beside, he took off the Lampard poster because he was stabbed by conscience. That look from Benjamin that Declan must have done something wrong and he's not telling him... so Declan got angry and stormed out.

 

 

Don't you get horny? Declan tried to bite his tongue. He could see Martin's expression darken rapidly.

 

 

*

 

The ping-pong table arrived after Benjamin had just finished making dinner, and he felt the salad he'd eaten digesting as he set up the huge, heavy table by himself. He felt uncomfortable for no reason. He knew he should wait for Declan, but he didn't want to make a no big deal over a ping-pong table with him, who'd run off like something was bothering him. Plus, he dosen't have a phone right now.

 

The ping-pong table in the living room is majestic. Benjamin fiddled with the ping-pong bat he'd been given as a free gift before heading next door. There are only so many places Declan Rice could go.

 

 

That's because Declan and Benjamin are tall. Martin, standing in front of the table, looked pretty unhappy. When Benjamin knocked on the door and Martin looked surprised to see his face. Benjamin wondered if something had suddenly clicked for him, why his face was so dark, and so on, but he quickly decided not to overthink it. In his experience, overthinking leads to overthinking.

 

 

For some reason, Declan is convinced that Martin Odegaard has never been in a proper relationship and he doesn't listen to Martin's advice. Martin defines love and romantic feelings in terms of two things. "I want to be with you, and I don't want to see you with someone else." Martin thought a lot about it, but Declan has already run away. After Declan ran off, he continued to think about love alone, and now he and Benjamin are now playing ball flying pretending to be a table tennis.

 

 

 

*

 

Declan Rice are still young, but he prided himself on having a love life with many twists and turns. Benjamin wanted to argue whether or not that was something to be proud of, but it was always in the back of his mind but never out loud. Declan thought the ups and downs of love were just as great as the ups and downs of life, and he often scoffed at the popular love stories and romance books in the bookstore.

 

After Benjamin and he became a couple, Declan added one more reason to scoff at such books: they are written from a straight human being's perspective. Benjamin agreed with him on that point, but he was a little upset when Declan laughed at Stendhal's On Love because he liked Stendhal quite a bit. But again, he didn't say anything. Because he thought it was kind of lame that Stendhal, who had written such a great book as The Red and the Black, wrote a book about love after a heartbreak.

 

In contrast to Declan's colorful love life, Benjamin White's strangest relationship was with Kalvin Phillips. They were both country bumpkins who had just set foot on London and had to work together to make it through the city. They were more like comrades than lovers. The only downside to this camaraderie was that the relationship began and ended in a blur. They were lovers without even asking for a date and ended similarly. There was no breakup announce, and the two coolly went back to being friends. On the day Kalvin flew back to Manchester, Benjamin gave him a hug and a wave (He unfollowed him on Instagram, but soon re-followed him), just like any of other friends who has never kissed or had sex with him. It was a strange thing indeed.

 

Benjamin was having a second class meeting with Declan at the time. He cursing the height that had brought them together again, the presence of Declan, who was excited to see a familiar face, and the inconsiderate professor who had arranged the grouping based on where they sat. Aaron Ramsdale was cursed at again, this time by Benjamin for not being in the same class.

 

When Benjamin eventually became "friends" with Declan, he found out about that guy's love life was very simple. Declan's lover at the time was a woman: she was a Londoner named Emily, a beautiful woman with dark hair and big green eyes. For a London boy to meet a London girl, Benjamin watched Declan's relationship as if it were a bit boring. Declan's relationship with girlfriend was like any other, filled with studying together in the library, walking in the park, going to the movies in the theater. So doing all the things that "ordinary guys do", Benjamin White gradually became joined in him. Things like watching football, drinking beer or playing table tennis.

 

It felt very strange to Benjamin because during his relationship with Kalvin, they didn't really separate what was appropriate between lovers and what was appropriate between same-sex friends. The distinction between hanging out with friends and being in a relationship became less and less clear. Benjamin and Declan gradually began to do things together naturally that lovers usually do. Watching movies, studying, getting coffee together at a cafe, etc.

 

 

*

 

When Declan Rice told him in a very nonchalant tone that he and Emily had broken up, Benjamin didn't really wonder. What's the big deal about Declan meeting and breaking up with his girlfriends, he doesn't care. But he did feel a slight, inexplicable discomfort.

 

And when Declan came out of the blue, claimed he is handsome, and asked to go out with him, Benjamin went home and cringed. More than the fever of love, it was an unknown guilt. Even though he knew no one blamed him, and no one thought he did, Benjamin thought he might be partly to blame for Declan's breakup with his nice girlfriend.

 

But he couldn't bring himself to cancel the movie tickets they'd bought for the weekend. They watched a romance movie together. They were a normal gay couple.

 

 

*

 

It was after five sets of ping-pong, if you can call it that, that Martin Odegaard finally surrendered. Just when they thought nothing could be broken anymore, the living room was already in shambles. Benjamin's furious serve bounced so hard that it knocked a calendar off the wall, and Martin, dodging a ball flying toward his face, stumbled and knocked down the table again.

 

 

Funny to you, serious threat to me, it's not my fault Declan ran off, why are you taking it out on me, etc.., Martin tried to swallowe words such as. He remembered the look on Declan's face when he told him that he had deleted Benjamin's messages. Declan looked like he was three days away from the end of the world. Of course, Martin Odegaard never lived through three days before the end of the world. The actors in the movie had that look on their faces. What's even sadder is that Benjamin White, who is playing ball in the background, has a similar expression on his face. It's clear that this gay couple is quite fond of each other, even if they try not to show it. At least to the point where you can't help but feel horribly twisted by the squeamishness between them.

 

Martin Odegaard then took the ping-pong bat from Benjamin and tried to fold the table by himself, causing a major accident. The table didn't fold up correctly. Martin was sweating profusely, wondering if it was a malfunction, so Benjamin joined him and they folded the table with all their might. The table made a popping sound under the folded table. The table was fine, of course. It was just that Martin's phone was stuck between the folds. By splitting the phone, they had folded the ping-pong table with enormous force.

 

Now there are only two people with broken phones, which meant that the chances of Benjamin White finding Declan Rice through civilization's triumphant return are close to zero percent.

 

 

*

 

Declan Rice is in a great mood, and it wasn't just because of the delicious wine and decent appetizers: he found a new, nice Spanish bar and made a cool new friend. Normally, he wouldn't have come to this restaurant because it is expensive, but this place had a great song selection. (The new friend decided to pay the bill.) They had Adele's Someone Like You playing. Never Mind, I'll Find Someone Like You... Adele's voice is amazing.

 

 

*

 

"It's so weird. We date, we kiss, we have sex, but I don't know if it's love. What Spaniards do? They're just so passionate, right? Fuck the English, but I'm English, too. I should go to Spain sometime. Is this pork? Jamon? It's delicious... Spain has nice weather, too!

 

Anyway, I've never seen anything like this before. We fight all the time. I mean, we fight all the time. We fight about the stupidest things. Most of the time, it's Benjamin White, the bastard, who wakes me up unnecessarily on days when I don't have class, hassled me because we need to clean up, blames me for the bugs when they come out... If I'm doing something, he scolds me for being loud, and if I get mad at him for it, he pouts. Pouts! But I know... Benjamin is very pretty.

 

Anyway, he's annoying. We fight all the time and he hits me. When we fight, we punches each other really hard. Benjamin get nosebleeds, and then I get dizzy, and then... it's weird. Why am I dizzy? I've been with girls before, but I never dizzy.

 

Anyway, Benjamin's ex contacted him to meet up, and I deleted it. I deleted it! I deleted it! I'm a dick! Wow, that's so dickish. I've never... seen anything like it. It's so funny, right? It's so dumb."

 

"Of course you don't want him to get involved with someone else. You said he's your boyfriend."

 

 

 

 

"Old wise man? Oh, thanks. Give me a phone. You're drunk. You started saying the same thing."

 

 

 

 

*

 

It was already late in the evening when Benjamin White walked into the fourth pub, and he began to search through the regulars he used to go to with his friends, including Declan. They had been drinking quite heavily lately and desperate to cut back for his health. Martin Odegaard accompanied him to the second pub, but soon became anxious that his phone was broken and left for the after-sales service center. It seemed unlikely that the phone would ever be resurrected, but Martin's anxiety seemed to have reached a strange peak, so Benjamin didn't try to talk him out of it. As usual, Martin was kind enough to take Benjamin's phone with him.

 

 

 

And as Benjamin turned away, wondering how to get out of this unpleasant situation. He spotted Declan Rice at the next table. He is drinking a beer, and a small man beside him, trying to stop him, but having no luck. Declan may have been an unaware bisexual, but he had never met a man other than Benjamin. So it is almost 100% possible that the man is a passerby or a friend. But he suddenly felt a very, very bad feeling.

 

 

*

 

And as Declan Rice sipped his last beer next to his new friend, who begged him to please go outside and get some air, since he'd just buy the beer too, he spotted Benjamin White talking to someone. That's him, that's him! It's Kalvin, that bastard Declan saw when he was spying on Benjamin's Instagram! Declan cringed. It made him feel so bad that I couldn't imagine it, a feeling so close to misery that he wanted to scream.

 

 

*

 

Pulling them out of the fight in the middle of the pub are the owner, Declan's new friend, and Kalvin and a group of friends, who watched on. People worried that it might turn violent, but the owner told them to go inside and get a drink and not to worry about it because these guys come in and fight often. Declan grunted and kicked Benjamin, who gritted his teeth and punched Declan in the back and thigh. The two fought in the street for a while, until a few passersby walked by and thought it was just a normal love quarrel fight and walked away, tongue-in-cheek. What they didn't realize was that the two men fighting are lovers and they are jealous. When Benjamin wiped his nose blood, it is Declan who started to feel dizzy again. He really is weak to Benjamin's blood. It us a very strange thing indeed.

 

 

They were talking about themselves and suddenly stopped fighting. Declan lay back with his temples aching, and so did Benjamin, who was out of gin, neither of them remembering why the other had been so angry. Benjamin forgot about Kalvin the moment he found Declan, and Declan forgot about his new friend the moment he found Benjamin. After lying there in a daze for a while, they slowly got up and brushed off their clothes. A realization hit them almost simultaneously.

 

 

*

 

 

 

Benjamin White and Declan Rice had been plagued by a strange silence and awkwardness for several days. It was very unlike them, and they both found it difficult, but there was nothing they could do about it. It was a relief that it wasn't a negative feeling. As they ate and talked about school work, or watched TV, or played games, a strange silence would hang between them when the conversation stopped. They were newly aware that they liked each other quite a bit, which was touching in some ways, but for them, it was awkward, uncomfortable, and ticklish.

 

It wasn't that they wanted to go back to the past; they just couldn't bring themselves to say the words, "I love you," or "Did you really do it," and they knew all too well that if either of them said it, they wouldn't be able to bear and they'd end up a fight. People don't live long when they do things they're not supposed to do. And so their lives are shortening.

 

Benjamin White lay in bed, staring blankly at the ceiling. The room is moderately warm and smelled good. Martin Odegaard hadn't been able to fix Benjamin's cell phone. So he didn't know what the hell Kalvin's message had been. It didn't seem important, and he didn't really want to know. Every time he closed his eyes and opened them, he could see Declan's face.

 

Tomorrow is a morning-only class day, and Benjamin and Declan planned to get a temporary cell phone, eat, and then watch a late-night movie. Declan had booked the movie. It would probably be a cheesy romance movie. He secretly liked that kind of thing.

 

And Declan Rice is staring at the ceiling, too, and the empty space without Lampard's poster felt somehow empty. He thought about Kalvin for a moment, and then about a friend he'd made and then broken up with after a few hours without exchanging numbers (a old wise man, perhaps, sent by a god he dosen't even believe in) and then, for a brief moment before he fell asleep, he thought about Benjamin White. He'd booked a thriller on purpose, even though there was a romance movie he wanted to see. Benjamin likes that kind of thing.

 

 

It was Declan who knocked on the door, and they fell silent again, having nothing to talk about. Benjamin wants to pull the covers over his head, but he knew he shouldn't, and Declan looked like he had the most regret in the world for entering into Benjamin's room, but he didn't do anything else. They fall silent again.

 

 

*

 

The temporary cell phone he was issued is lousy. Benjamin White needed a phone, not a computer, but the lack of functionality is making him miserable. Martin had come back with the news that he couldn't fix Benjamin's phone, but that he might be able to get it fixed somehow. But Benjamin thought there was something inwardly bitter about the fact that Martin had only been issued his own temporary phone. Of course, maybe he'd just forgotten. After all, the badminton rackets had also been forgotten. Declan agreed, but their trust and faith in Martin was quickly restored within two days. They needed Benjamin's ID to issue it.

 

Declan loved technology, and as an early adopter in the tech world, he wanted to add new features to Benjamin's new phone, but unfortunately, it didn't have the capability to do so.

 

While Declan went to pick up the movie tickets, Benjamin checked his backed-up datas and saved Declan's number as emergency number 3. Number one for mom (obvious), two for dad (also obvious). Ellie, the original number 3, would probably understand.

 

But he still missed his old phone, and was envious of Declan's intact phone, both of which had Arsenal's anthem as their ringtone.

 

 

*

 

Martin Odegaard is in a very bad mood, the most extreme mood swings he had experienced in the last two years. He hadn't been this stressed out when he'd gotten in trouble with his professor for submitting the paper, or when he'd left his passport behind when he had to return to Norway, or when his train had been delayed, or even when his plants had dried up because he'd overwatered them, or when the gay couple next door had come to his house and started fighting. This is the same level of stress as when Arsenal were out of all the cups in a matter of weeks. When Arsenal were knocked out, he broke his promise to himself and drank until he was drunk, but lying in his living room drunk and singing North London Forever didn't get Arsenal a rematch.

 

The only reason was that his phone was broken. But the moment he saw the first message on his temporary cell phone, he got a terrible headache. He needed someone to talk to. Martin hesitated for a moment, then ran next door, but the gay couple who had always clung to the house like sloths were not there. The house was empty, and for the first time, he realized that the old saying that it's never around when you need it. The old saying is never wrong. Annoying gay couple. His emotions are furious.

 

- Hi, Martin. You haven't returned my calls, so I left a message. I'm arriving in London midweek, ahead of schedule, so I just booked a hotel. Let me know if you hear from me.

 

He wanted to cry. He had swept and mopped the house like crazy, cleaned the plants, and even brought in a natural aromatherapy and air freshener to make the environment even more pleasant, but all his efforts had gone to waste when his phone broke. It's all because of the ping-pong table.

 

But he didn't forget, and he hung his badminton rackets bag strap on the doorknob of Declan and Benjamin's house. He felt briefly sorry that he'd forgotten it and that they hadn't been able to play badminton while he'd borrowed it, but he couldn't forgive that the gay couple had gone on a date at this hour. But they weren't playing badminton because he'd borrowed the rackets. They weren't playing because they couldn't be bothered and it was the future of the ping-pong table.

 

 

*

 

During the time that Martin wandered in front of their house and timidly kicked the door twice, Declan and Benjamin were watching a thriller movie, and Declan opened his eyes briefly and closed them again while the killer was killing his victims. He ate all the popcorn by himself instead. It hadn't been a romantic date at all. Benjamin would rather watch a romance movie.

 

 

*

 

Of course, the incident happened. On a day when one of his classes was canceled and he had no classes, Declan and Benjamin were playing ping-pong to pass the time without any tasks. Benjamin's eyes widened when Declan asked him to open the ping-pong table, and when Declan asked him why the packaging was torn, Benjamin felt a twinge of guilt, but he couldn't bring himself to say that he'd ripped it open and hit it first. Declan was even more suspicious when he realized that the ping-pong bat pack was also broken, but he soon forgot about that when he saw the magnificence of the table. Benjamin had a appreciation for Declan's simplicity. With excitement, they began to play ping-pong. With the endorphins of initiation kicking in, Declan was really, really good at the game. After a few missed serves, Benjamin was the first to get tired. He had already lost the impression of the beginning.

 

 

Benjamin's actually not concentrating. He's insincere serve enraged Declan, and he unleashed a powerful smash. It's an affront to the sport. The ball hits the corner, bounces hard, and hits Benjamin in the nose. Declan isn't a professional table tennis player, and even if he is, he's not that good, so it was definitely unintentional, but Benjamin was furious. Because Declan didn't look sorry at all.

 

 

When Benjamin hit Declan in the face with a ping-pong ball (again, not intentionally; they aren't that good at ping-pong), Declan was furious too, yelling at Benjamin for doing such a thing. The missed ping-pong bat hit the ping-pong table and flew away, landing this time at Benjamin's feet. They'd done it anyway. They both knew it. Now come on, no need to hide it. When Declan muttered "Fuck Off" in a low voice, but loud enough for Benjamin to hear, they started to fight. But the table is still precious, so they carefully folded it up and put it to one side. A fight had to be fair.

 

As they rolled over and kicked the wall a second time, they heard the sound of someone kicking the door open. None of their neighbors would kick the door open. Puzzled, they stopped fighting. Declan rubbed his stiff jaw and opened the door to find Martin Odegaard standing there, grunting and kicking at the doorjamb with a badminton rackets. Benjamin's eyes widened as he followed, rubbing his battered shoulder. Martin is kicking the door? It doesn't seem possible.

 

 

*

 

Martin Odegaard is unusually upset by the noise from his neighbors, and his anger was amplified when he saw that his prized badminton rackets were still hanging on the doorknob.

 

 

While Martin was frantically trying to figure out ":)" how to interpret this, the gay couple next door was making him even angrier.

 

 

*

 

 

The house is quiet after the storm. They were lying on the floor, staring blankly at the ceiling, having forgotten they were fighting. Martin shouted words that were clearly English but unintelligible. Roughly translated, they were: Shut up, badminton, I'm in a mess, this is all your fault, did you like your date last night, assholes, yeah, let's get fucked up together, come to my place later, let's get drunk with our noses crooked, Declan, you can sprinkle that weird party pollen on me, I won't make you clean it up, get me a beer, I'll prepare the smoked salmon, you all kneel before the Norwegian salmon! And the last one was unintelligible. It was Norwegian, presumably swear words. When Martin had finished his rant, which began as anger and ended as an invitation to drink, and had disappeared, they both felt their stomachs drop, dumbfounded, but still throbbing where they had been hit. Declan rolled over and lay on his back, arms outstretched.

 

 

Martin got feverish, revealed all secrets, and disappeared. They are too weak to fight. Benjamin stared blankly at the ceiling. This silence was somehow familiar. It was different from the silence that had tickled him and made him feel uneasy, like he had to say something. This time it is comfortable, familiar and just pleasant. It is the same for Declan.

 

 

*

 

Declan and Benjamin were back to their usual bickering, arguing, and punching each other, and then they are lying in the living room. It is nice to be back to normal, but that didn't mean they weren't aware of that tickling sensation between them. It is like magic.

 

So Declan hugged Benjamin, and Benjamin hugged Declan back. As they kissed, the ping-pong table kept brushing against their toes. Declan kicked it away, because right now. The ping-pong table doesn't matter.

 

 

*

 

Declan and Benjamin were enjoying their salmon, listening to Martin's word in one ear and letting it slip out the other, while Martin Odegaard rambled on about something uncharacteristically drunk. He wasn't wrong about kneeling before the Norwegian salmon. So they ignored him while hr staggered to his temporarily-issued cell phone and dialed a number, ignored him while he shouted something and flinched, and only paid attention when he finally slammed his face into the table squirming. It was because they had finished his salmon.

 

 

And when the bell rang, Martin was no longer able to contain himself. Declan opened the door as if he owned it. He thought he deserved it casue he loved this house as much as Martin did. Benjamin was trying to help Martin, who was slumped over the table, unable to contain himself. And when he flailed his arms and legs, not bigger than him, Benjamin immediately felt a grave threat to his life. The Viking. Is he a descendant of Vikings after all?

 

Benjamin looked up when he heard Declan shouting. There stood the man he encountered at the pup that day. He was sharply offended for a moment, but quickly decided to put it out of his mind; it would be a disgraceful thing to do now, unacceptable to his pride. And before he could think of anything else, Martin, who had been sobbing, jumped to his feet at the sound of his voice. It was the same reaction as Pavlov's dog. Benjamin, who had been supporting him, staggered and fell to the floor. For the first time, he realized that he should not turn Martin Odegaard against him.

 

 

Between the noisy Declan, the laughing Arteta, and the bewildered Martin, only Benjamin White stood with his arms folded and his mouth shut. He isn't going to speak to "the sir" in question, for the time being. And it wasn't because Mikel Arteta is some kind of uneasy person, not really. It wasn't because Martin and Declan were wagging their tails like retrievers meeting water, too. It was simply because they hadn't been formally introduced.

 

 

*

 

And when Benjamin got home and put a drunk Declan to bed, he suddenly looked up at the ceiling. Something had changed. Benjamin thought for a moment about what had changed, and then a smile crept across his face.

 

 

Declan Rice and Benjamin White argued a lot when they were looking for a place to live together, because time was running out. Declan was living at his home like a London boy, but he was about to be kicked out by his older brother's return home (which made Benjamin suspicious of Declan's constant insistence that he was the cutest little kid in their home), and Benjamin was about to end up on the streets when a friend he was living with (who wasn't gay) returned home.

 

The weather was getting colder, and the message boards were flooded with people looking for housemates and switching houses. It was just after self-appealing love confession that he was handsome that Declan somehow managed to completely blow the final exam. He didn't write the right answer on the sheet. He later complains that he failed the test because of Benjamin's lukewarm reaction to his confession, but Benjamin doesn't think for a second that he was the reason who Declan failed the test. Even with such a confession, Benjamin got over the exam.

 

Declan asked Benjamin to go with him to look at places, and Benjamin was suddenly grateful that the Bournemouth boy had a home in London. He felt bad for Declan's unhappiness that little kid didn't seem to be getting much love in home, but there was nothing he could do about it. As they circled the boards and visited a couple of properties, Benjamin got a nudge from his housemate to move back home in. Declan scoffed. Come to think of it, the housemate was a Londoner, too. He knew from inductive experience that he should be wary of Londoners. He is a logical man.

 

Finding the house they live in now was a stroke of luck. The house is warm, cozy, a good size, and cheap because it was a short sale. It is also close to school and the owners are friendly. Declan and Benjamin soon stopped fighting and signed the lease. Their good fortune and joy soon became Martin Odegaard's misfortune. Martin is the gay couple's next-door neighbor.

 

 

Declan grumbled as he organized the medicine bottles in the cupboard. His parents are worried about their son's health away from home in London, and they'd even sent him Benjamin's nutritional supplements. (Was he really the cuddly youngest? Benjamin was confused.) Benjamin stared at the pills in Declan's hand, feeling a strange, subtle emotion every time he took them: a strange sense of relief and anxiety. Declan's parents had gone out of their way to pack his nutrition. There was also a hint of guilt; he hadn't yet told his family about Declan's existence.

 

Martin's house has always had the right temperature and humidity, so his plants don't need nutrients. He is kind enough to share the nutrients with the trees near his house, which was quite a culture shock for both of them. The plants in Martin's house probably don't even know winter is here. He is such a good host.

 

Martin is a good man, of course, and Declan and Benjamin felt a sense of duty and even mission to go and educate anyone who didn't think so, but the idea that Martin is a good man and the idea that he is somehow weird can coexist. Martin Odegaard is weird. Of course, Martin also thought the gay couple next door are weird, but he didn't say it out loud. Declan and Benjamin live together. That meant they could chew him out for being weird. Martin couldn't. He had no one who knew both of them at the same time, who would understand and agree with their gossip. He is alone.

 

 

*

 

They had just unboxed their belongings and started to organize their rooms when they realized they needed a hammer. "We can ask the guy next door to borrow one!" Declan immediately jumped to his feet, but Benjamin had at least some dignity. They decided that the nail-pulling and hammering could wait, and went out to buy a cookie set. The neighbor is handsome, with picturesque blond hair and blue eyes, and very friendly. He is Norwegian, but unfortunately, he and Haaland are not friends.

 

And, in fact, Benjamin and Declan thought that Martin, with his dedication to studying, working, growing plants, playing football, and reading books, might be asexual. The misunderstanding grew as time went on. "I don't care if he's asexual." Benjamin thought. Martin is a very good listener. "Maybe he's a botanophile. It's a bit much to say that he gets off on flowers and leaves..." Declan retorted with a misunderstanding, but soon forgot about it. Martin's home is so cozy that he wanted to be a plant nymphomaniac himself.

 

 

*

 

And when that Martin Odegaard burst into their home and asked to speak to them about the merits of “living together”, they felt very uncomfortable. Martin had been uncharacteristically emotional and irritable lately. Ever since Benjamin had feared for his life when he tried to talk him out of a drunken stupor, he'd been careful not to upset him, and Declan had been surprised to discover that maybe Martin isn't asexual or phytophilic as they'd thought. What neither of them cared about is that Martin's infatuation is with a man, a man who was quite old.

 

As they fed the fidgety Martin churros (which he had bought, of course), they thought hard. Even though he didn't normally have a sweet tooth, it was times like these that he would calm down, but this time it just didn't seem to work. They had to give him an answer, and fast. But no matter how hard they tried, it was hard to come up with an upside to living together. Especially if you live with Declan Rice or Benjamin White.

 

 

*

 

 

Declan wanted to shut Benjamin's mouth as he talked back constantly. They were taking the situation quite seriously because they knew what Martin is thinking. The day they had their ridiculous misunderstanding and were running and punching the streets, Declan met a new friend, a sage. He liked his new friend very much, and he didn't like the way Benjamin kept rambling and mumbling about something. If you asked Benjamin what was bothering him, he probably wouldn't answer. He was secretly timid.

 

In any case, Declan's new friend is the "VVIP from San Sebastian" that Martin had mentioned before, and Martin had been trying his best to organize the house so that they could spend a little time together. "I had to stop you guys! Fucking ping-pong table! None of this would have happened if the damn table hadn't smashed my phone!" Their time playing ping-pong had seriously diminished over the course of the week, but they still valued the table. Inwardly, they are surprised that Martin is capable of such violence.

 

Benjamin is in charge of paying the rent, including water and electricity. Anyway, by living together, they are able to save some money. For the students, that is pretty important.

 

 

Mikel Arteta is living in a hotel right now. He has about a month of work in London. If he lived with Martin, he'd probably be willing to pay close to the same price. Declan had gotten to know him pretty well over the past few days, and he is subtle about it. Martin's expression darkened sharply as he listened, chewing nervously on the sugar in his churros. High sugar content can cause high blood pressure and diabetes... Benjamin thought of such things, but didn't say anything. After all, the main benefit of saving money is only good for Martin, not Mikel. Besides, Martin would never think of getting paid, so talking about it would only make things awkward between them.

 

 

Mikel Arteta is a working man, and even if he liked to study, there was no way he was going to study with Martin after hours. If Martin was studying, Mikel would have to read or be quiet next to him, which would be frustrating and make him miss the freedom of hotel life. In a hotel, you can turn on the TV or drink wine at dawn and no one will judge you. They don't have to be considerate of Martin's studying. This is a fatal weakness that shouldn't be discussed.

 

 

The session was briefly disrupted when Declan couldn't take it anymore and lunged at Benjamin. When Martin pulled them apart and asked politely them to focus on his own issues, Declan's cell phone started ringing. Mikel. Martin's face contorted subtly as he recognized the caller, and Martin dropped Declan from his soothing embrace, plunging into a sudden depression. Martin didn't like the message from Mikel, asking Declan what he is doing. It was a message Martin should have receive, not Declan Rice.

 

 

They really like Martin, and they really, really wanted to give him the closure he wanted. It had nothing to do with Declan liking Mikel or Benjamin's awkward relationship with him, which he still hadn't greeted properly. It is because Martin wants to be with Mikel Arteta. It would take a dramatic and logical reason to convince him, but unfortunately, they had neither the means nor the power to do so. Moreover, the more they talked, the more depressed they became, as they realized that they didn't see much merit in living together.

 

After sending a message to Mikel to come when he could, they sat in depression with Martin, who popped a churros in his mouth and tried to steady himself. For the first time, they realized why people need plants and aromatherapy. Martin was the first to revive. He checked his phone. His phone had received a message before Declan's did.

 

 

*

 

Benjamin White wakes up early in the morning and, regardless of whether it's cold or hot, he ventilates first. He's very conscientious and calm, at least when it comes to sticking to his schedule, but a normal person would sleep in on days when he doesn't have classes, or on holidays, or when he's had a few beers the night before. Benjamin couldn't. He had to wake up anyway, even though he was desperate for more sleep. Whenever Benjamin's morning ringtone rang, Declan would bury his face in his pillow and resist the urge to scream. It was a serious invasion of privacy. The same thing happened with bugs. Benjamin is really bad about bugs.

 

When Declan Rice was playing FM or FIFA and couldn't stop cheering himself on, Benjamin would feel the urge to turn it off. Declan would feel his insides boil when he sensed Benjamin was arguing with him. Stress was the root of everything.

 

No matter how you look at it, there are no advantages. They began to seriously question why they are living together. It is possible to have a good relationship while living separately. Benjamin and Kalvin did, Declan and Emily did, but why are they living together?

 

 

*

 

It was Mikel Arteta who sensed something was amiss, and he kindly shared the food and beer he had bought with both hands with Declan and Benjamin in their fridge. After alternating glances between the uncharacteristically serious gay couple and the equally serious Martin, he took the depressed Martin and disappeared into Martin's place.

 

Benjamin opened the ping-pong table and held out a stick, and Declan took it and served. Within a week, the game of ping pong, which had become stale, was suddenly a lot of fun. When things get complicated, it's best to do something simple. In the time they'd been dating and living together, they'd done a lot of thinking. From the bottom of their emotions to how they feel about who they are. The ping-pong was great. Declan was always good at ping pong, and Benjamin was catching the ball better than usual. Martin didn't think so, but being able to play ping pong while living together was a huge advantage. Once they found one, they felt a sense of inward pride.

 

 

They paused for a moment. They were tired from their long indoor workout. They drank the cans of beer Mikel had given them, threw them down, jumped on the couch, and kissed. The kiss was good. As they held each other's hair and kissed for a long time, they discovered one more reason why they loved living together. They could kiss whenever they wanted, whether it was morning or dawn. They could get out of bed, open the door, walk a few steps, knock on the door, and the person they wanted to kiss would be in the room. They thought they should tell Martin about this, but they decided now was not the right time.

 

Martin is with Mikel now. They couldn't say, "Martin, tell Mikel that if you live with me, you can always kiss me!" in front of him. And they never know when they're going to kiss. Mikel is very attractive, but doesn't look easy to anyone. They wonders if it would be less difficult if Martin is asexual or aphrodisiac, and start drinking beer and eating the churros he left behind.

 

 

*

 

A few hours later, Martin Odegaard protested that they hadn't to play table tennis at home. He was very angry at the ping-pong sound that had ruined their conversation time. Declan and Benjamin had nothing to say, but at the same time, they had something to say. They are already polishing their football boots after a good time of ping-pong and beer. Wasn't the timing too late? Before Declan could protest, Mikel's eyes sparkled. Benjamin and Declan both felt an unexplainable chill.

 

 

 

*

 

Declan and Benjamin were dumbfounded as Martin Odegaard pleaded with Mikel that their team needed a coach. As an amateur weekend early football team, they had never had a coach before. Of course, it wasn't a matter of consensus among the other players. But Martin didn't seem to care. His purpose was already clear.

 

 

*

 

Mikel promised to pack up and move into Martin's house for the remainder of the trip. In his opinion, both Declan and Benjamin needed systematic tactical training. And They also had a guilty conscience to repay Martin's usual kindness by not protesting at all. They don't really need tactical training, but Martin needs Mikel. Desperately.

 

 

 

 

Benjamin White is a logical man, and by extension, an objectifying man. That meant that when Declan Rice looked in the mirror every morning before he washed his face and admired himself, "I'm looking a little handsome today, don't you think?" he couldn't chuckle to him. Yes, Declan is so handsome. And Benjamin secretly thought he isn't bad compared to Declan, which meant that when they are together, they could be overly conspicuous. Plus, they are big. Pretty big.

 

Once he got past the objectification of his appearance, Benjamin began to reflect on his current situation. That something Declan would never do, and he would look at Benjamin who deep in thought and wonder why he was even thinking about it. Anyway, while Declan concluded that Benjamin's introspection was futile, Benjamin found himself reflecting on a situation between the two that he'd been avoiding to avoid thinking too deeply about. He bumped into Emily by chance on campus.

 

 

Declan wasn't there. He was burning through an assignment the professor had given him two weeks to complete. Benjamin, of course, had finished it, organized the reference list twice, and even created a beautiful cover page for his essay summary. Declan would have done the same if he had time, but of course, he didn't have time to fix the references and typos. It was never going to happen.

 

 

And then, coincidentally, the phone rang. North London Forever. The ringtone Declan had downloaded for him is needlessly grandiose. Against the stirring backdrop of the Emirates stadium, Benjamin and Emily's surroundings burned. With shame and embarrassment. Benjamin quickly checked his phone. It's Declan. Of course, he couldn't answer the phone right now. When the ringing ended, she sighed and said. "I'm sorry, but you two... neither of you had any idea."

 

Benjamin hesitated for a moment, unsure how to respond to the nuanced question. It's true that he's in a relationship with Declan. It's true that he's struggling. The fact that neither of them had any idea... it is something to think about. He resented her a little for throwing both cheers at him at once. He couldn't say yes or no at once. And then the phone rang again. Emily shrugged and walked away. Benjamin is left alone, 'NokiddingBen, Imdying, getmethebookfromthe library, Idonthavetimetogo,' with Declan's message.

 

 

*

 

Benjamin White is deep in thought the entire time. Emily's question forced him to rethink. Am I dating Declan Rice? The answer is a resounding yes. So, should he confess a secret that even his family didn't know about, especially when his boyfriend is Declan Rice? He really don't know. Of course he liked Declan, aside from whether or not Declan is a good boyfriend.

 

But Declan? He is a little embarrassed to say it, but he likes Benjamin White, not the other guy.  (Though he don't know when another man crush would come along.) Declan would probably scoff at that, saying that was it, but it is different. Benjamin had dated men before he and Declan are together, and he would probably date men after they broke up. But Declan had never been with a man before Benjamin.

 

Do you confess to your family and friends that his boyfriend who you don't know when he'll be back in the straight world? Declan probably doesn't expect that either. Like Benjamin, he wouldn't say much. Maybe that's why Declan's dad sent him the nutritional supplements. A friend who lives with his son. Not a boyfriend.

 

This is not an easy problem to conclude, even in the mind of the logic king Benjamin White.

 

Benjamin decided to think about it again later, when he felt better. Because the more he thought about it, the more he realized that if he broke up with him, Declan would probably find another girl, and that made him depressed. He stopped thinking and started watching Declan, who is frantically working on his assignment. Suddenly, it is reassuring to see Declan doing something so stupid next to him.

 

 

*

 

Declan was in such a good mood after finishing his essay that he invited his neighbors (well, one boy and one adult) over for a beer. Martin Odegaard is a very happy man these days, and he hasn't looked happier since he nursed a dying plant back to life and Arsenal reached the Champions League. As Declan and Benjamin sat in the living room watching television, they could hear Martin and Mikel playing badminton (borrowed from them) and table tennis (borrowed from them) next door. Martin seemed to have forgotten that not long ago he had criticized such sounds.

 

 

Benjamin thought the same way, and felt a little resentful when he remembered Martin's dismissive attitude when he'd pointed it out to him. He was angry at Martin for smiling and saying, "I think so too," but to others, it would be seen as a random act of violence against a nice guy. Plus, Martin is... scary when he's angry. Declan, of course, didn't seem to think much of it. He's all for it.

 

Mikel Arteta and Benjamin White are still a bit fuzzy. Declan and Martin didn't seem to realize it, but they still hadn't made formal introductions. Mikel is a kind and intelligent man, but sometimes... crazy. Benjamin is the only one who can see it, because Martin is blinded by love, and Declan, with his intense crush on Mikel, dosen't think much of it. Which made Benjamin feel even more alone.

 

 

Martin looked dizzy. Mikel understood. He was thinking about a set piece. Declan, who had been drinking beer, turned on the Fifa game. "Fifa is so much more original than online!" The four of them started to play. To choose sides, they flipped their palms, which coincidentally put Martin and Benjamin on one side and Declan and Mikel on the other. Benjamin felt a little offended, and at the same time, a vague sense of defeat.

 

 

*

 

Benjamin's prediction was spot on. Declan was usually very good at this game, but after a few too many beers, he lost control. Mikel took over the baton. Looking like he'd never played a video game in his life, he was pretty good with the controller. Benjamin tried his best to control Jesus, but the player blew his chances with a few heel kicks. This game is too realistic. It was a little strange to play Arsenal vs. Arsenal. Mikel was also controlling Jesus, and when a heel pass was fired into no-man's land, he muttered under his breath. Fogging.

 

For a moment, everyone was silent: why do we all feel like we've been punished? But Martin was having so much fun everything with Mikel, it was as if he had forgotten that he'd been sworn at. Benjamin handed the game over to Martin, and when he saw that he was blatantly trying to lose to Mikel, he kicked him and grabbed the controller again.

 

 

The basic operation is the same for 10, 20, or 23. Martin was trying to shield himself from Benjamin's indignant accusations. Declan, seemingly unconcerned, is playing by himself against the computer. Declan's Raya scored a goal against the computer's Raya. While Declan was playing weird and Benjamin was fighting back alone, Mikel and Martin were already talking about something else, eating churros with less sugar.

 

Benjamin felt sorry for himself fighting alone, and he felt sorry for Declan, who was scoring goals for Raya with Raya. It is a small game, but if something bigger ever happened and they needed to band together, they would probably play solo.

 

Martin and Mikel are not dating (contrary to Martin's wishes). Cleaning up their tracks, Benjamin resumed watching themselves. He was offended that he lost to two people who weren't even a couple. Emily's words came back to him. "Ben, you and Rice... I'm sorry." He rolled his eyes. I'm dating Declan, yes. I know I like him. But what the hell are we doing?

 

 

*

 

 

 

*

 

Benjamin watched Martin and Mikel with keen eyes as they washed the dishes. They are polite people, and had offered to do the dishes as a thank-you after eating the food Declan had made out of control. Martin looked like he wanted to do it all, but of course it didn't go his way, which was a far cry from the mess Declan made in Martin's house every time he came over. Martin cleaned the bowl, and Mikel took it from him, wiped it dry, and put it away. They settled in. They breathed well together.

 

 

Benjamin turned and looked at Declan, who was still eating his jelly. Lately, he'd been obsessed with apple-flavored jelly. Declan hates doing dishes. Even so, he always breaks at least one plate, and their dishes are increasingly made of plastic. Martin worries about endocrine disrupting chemicals that plastic dishes produce, but it's probably better for their health than breaking a plate and scattering glass shards.

 

 

Martin Odegaard is now trying to become herb self-sufficient. Jamie Oliver would love that. Benjamin is a little surprised that even Mikel, who doesn't look like he'd do it anyway, is growing herbs with him. He thought Martin is one-sided, but "the sir" is good with him too?

 

Benjamin looked at them with a bit of awe now; they aren't dating, and he is pretty sure they dosen't think of themselves as such, but they are definitely a gay couple (not a normal looking one, but kind of a pretty picture), and a very close one at that. Unlike Benjamin and Declan.

 

 

*

 

While Benjamin was tormented by unnecessary comparisons, Declan was on his way to the park early in the morning. It was the early football meeting. He'd cut out morning classes to get more sleep, but football was important to him. Benjamin didn't make it. This was very unusual for him, as he'd been sleeping in uncharacteristically late lately, lost in thought at every opportunity. Of course, he woke up once, turned off the alarm, freshened up, and remembered to call the president to say he couldn't make it. Declan ran into Martin, who was jogging lightly.

 

 

 

Martin Odegaard looked depressed at the moment: their time together was running out, and Mikel Arteta was wasting it playing amateur football. Of course, that's Martin's problem. 

 

 

Martin's answer gave Declan a strange feeling. So this is what it's like to be in love... He looked back at Martin, who had finished stretching and started running again, lightly, following Mikel's instructions. Something made Declan envious.

 

The absence of Benjamin, an essential resource in defense, caused serious problems for the team. Despite Martin's goal, the team was unable to stop the attacks from both wingers and collapsed, allowing the opposition to take advantage. Declan covered well, but the lack of a proper fullback was too much to handle. But whether the dark arts of a real manager exists (their opponent was obviously without one), they managed to win by the skin of their teeth. As expected of an interim coach of an amateur team, Mikel didn't say anything except encouragement. Declan felt very comfortable with the trust between Mikel and Martin, and envied them again.

 

 

*

 

Not surprisingly, the conversation didn't go well. The conversation descended into a discussion about whether we were even in a relationship at all, Eventually, the two decided they couldn't talk anymore and started fighting, with the winner deciding to voice their displeasure first. The anger was amplified by Martin, who knocked on their door claiming that Mikel had woken up.

 

 

 

 

 

*

 

In fact, they are both overly individualized, but they had some sense of what triggered each other and what triggered them, and contrary to what you might think, they put each other first. Benjamin was saying once what he should have said twice, and he was genuinely concerned about Declan's health and day. Declan did the ventilation and dishes, which he hated, suppressed gaming and beer, and stepped on bugs before Benjamin could see them. There was no way for them to know that they were attuned to each other, and a conversation about it would have made things better, but they were more interested in having sex against the wall.

 

When am I going to tell my mom? When am I going to ask him when he's going to tell his family? For now, that is for later.

 

 

 

England speaks English. English is English, not American. That gave Declan Rice and Benjamin White a convenient and somewhat embarrassing reason to feel no pressure to communicate with their foreign friends, including Martin Odegaard. But the college didn't see it that way. Pushing their backs from the college, Declan left for the world of Spanish and Benjamin for the world of French, with no end in sight.

 

Meanwhile, Mikel Arteta and Benjamin White were still felt awkward around each other. They were the only ones who knew about it, but there was no way to formally introduce them now. Of course, Martin had tried to introduce them the first day they met. "Sir, this is... Benjamin. Ben, this is..." "I know him," it was Mikel who interrupted Martin, and he regretted the moment because of the awkward atmosphere. Of course, Benjamin was full of unexpressed frustration at the time, so it is doubtful that he would have received the greeting properly, but a formal introduction is very important for a gentleman. Between Declan, who was eating pudding and playing a game, and Martin, who was watering the plants, Mikel and Ben were both silent, unable to think of anything to say.

 

 

Declan suddenly shut up. Martin finished watering the plants and began wiping the water droplets off the leaves. According to Martin, convex water droplets are harmful because they act as magnifying glasses, concentrating sunlight on the plant's leaves. It was good household and scientific common sense, but right now, Declan was more concerned with remembering Vincent Cassel's face. A gay man could comment on a male actor's appearance, but he was sensitive.

 

The television was playing a French movie that Benjamin had put on for studying. Declan looked at Monica Bellucci on the screen and was suddenly glad that Vincent Cassel was her ex-husband. Because Monica Bellucci was not only beautiful, she IS TOO beautiful. If Benjamin White were to stalk Cassel one day, using him as his muse, the actor would not even bat an eye. So Declan smirked a little.

 

 

It was the first conversation without Declan or Martin interrupting. For the first time, Benjamin found something they shared besides football. They both spoke French, even if Benjamin didn't speak it very well and Mikel spoke it quite a bit. This was quite a surprise, because the silence was awkward and somewhat boring. Of course, they could also converse in English. But having something in common quickly became a tangible benefit to their relationship.

 

Benjamin was using Mikel as a language textbook, stumbling over the dialog in the book, but he seemed to be having a really great conversation. Again, this is a conversation that could have been had in English. It just wasn't. He was proud of his conversation because Martin, who was wiping the water off the plant, and Declan, who was also playing the game, were staring at them blankly.

 

 

Declan's conscience was troubled. Benjamin was even more amused. Talking to Mikel Arteta was more fun than he thought it would be, and if Declan and Martin didn't understand each other, that was perfect. It was a surprise to Benjamin that Mikel spoke seven languages, and it was a good thing French was one of them. Benjamin looked at Martin, who was still staring at them with his towel in his hand, and especially at the sadness on his face. Martin had been trying to show off something by speaking to Mikel in Spanish. (What? Why?)

 

 

Declan pretended not to be, listening intently to their conversation. Mikel, who had been chatting away in French for a while, had gotten a call from work and had to leave on short notice. This is Martin Odegaard's house, and of course the gay couple should go home, but Declan hasn't finished his game yet.

 

Martin is very, very nice. You have to be nice to a nice guy, but he's ignored Benjamin's warnings about sugar and churros. He's also been noisy since they started playing badminton and table tennis, and worst of all, Benjamin has to tease Declan for pretending to be interested when he's not.

 

 

 

*

 

Whether it's Vincent Cassel or Xabi Alonso, they're both Vincent Cassel and Xabi Alonso in French, which means that Benjamin and Mikel never talked about them. At first, Declan tried to keep the game going without getting involved in Benjamin's antics, but it was still fun to tease Martin. After all, neither Vincent Cassel nor Xabi Alonso look like Martin.

 

 

"Martin is scary when he's angry, he's so strong, he could kill us..." Benjamin whispered, watching Martin's face turn even redder than it had when he was talking about Xabi Alonso. He really regretted making fun of Martin. After all, Declan Rice is his boyfriend, so Benjamin had a duty to protect him from Martin's fists. It was also necessary to protect Martin from Declan's mouth. Martin is kind, sensitive, and quick to hurt where Mikel was concerned.

 

 

*

 

 

"He dosen't even eat." Mikel shrugged his shoulders in disbelief. The aftermath of Why Doesn't He Learn Norwegian? had been more than he expected. Benjamin had felt intensely guilty the moment he'd heard Martin's news, but he couldn't bring himself to admit now that Vincent Cassel and Norwegian was just a joke. He'd felt threatened for his life by Martin before, but it hadn't been on purpose. If Martin was serious about deleting Benjamin and Declan, he'd run them out of town like he'd run the ball out of a football game. Besides, Declan is the one who caused the incident.

 

 

Mr. Arteta speaks seven languages, that's amazing! My favorite Mikel Arteta! But why don't you ever learn Norwegian? Is it because I always speak to you in Spanish? Don't speak to Benjamin in French, it's like an affair... Oh, no, it's not an affair, he's got a boyfriend and I'm single... We're not together... It was obvious that this was going to be the rough translation, but Mikel Arteta didn't seem to have a clue. Martin's despair at being in bed for the three hour in a row was palpable, and Benjamin felt dizzy. It was similar to the way he'd felt when Declan had flat rejected his suggestion to take down Lampard's poster. He'd done a very mean thing.

 

While Benjamin was reflecting, Declan was also getting a little nervous, as he was convinced that their poor Martin was going to say goodbye to Mikel without even a proper confession. He's rather happy to be asexual or a plant-sexual. Cruel Mikel Arteta. Declan ignored the fact that it all started with his own prank.

 

"I don't see why my inability to speak Norwegian would make Martin sad. We've been communicating well in English and Spanish."

 

 

 

*

 

Declan, who only knew Hola, Gracias, and for some reason Vamos in Spanish, had been thinking a lot lately. Watching Benjamin and Mikel converse in French (actually, one of them stuttered), he had mixed feelings. It wasn't just jealousy. Benjamin is using Mikel for ChatGPT. But it wasn't just suspicion. Benjamin is having fun without me?? Mikel arteta said, and Benjamin White laughed. It was a subtle feeling, mixed with a bit of alienation. Declan thought about how Martin must have been feeling and decided that he should go and apologize to him right away. And unlike Declan and Benjamin, who were in a relationship anyway, Martin and Mikel... Martin's one-sided...

 

So Declan decided to use all the Spanish he knew to speak to Aaron Ramsdale. He was sitting in front of him when he made the decision. And he remembered seeing Aaron's face the first day he chose Spanish class. Like Declan and Benjamin, Aaron is big, and like them, he stood out easily.

 

 

 

 

When Benjamin, who was blatantly holding back laughter, went to get more coffee, Declan whispered to Aaron, and Aaron swung his hand in the air. Benjamin looked happy as he returned. Declan pouted as he chewed on the cookies Benjamin had brought him.

 

 

He wouldn't do that with just Hola and Como. Declan thought for a moment, then decided that Benjamin was trying to be considerate, and his mood lifted a bit. For the first time in a long time, they were lying side by side on the bed in Declan's room instead of Benjamin's, snuggling.

 

They respected each other's overly strong personalities in their own way, but it was important for them to mix once in a while. It's the kind of thing that can't be explained by the difference between a London boy and a Bournemouth boy. In any case, alienation is not good when you're in a relationship. While Declan was thinking about that, Benjamin stared at the ceiling. There was a new Frank Lampard poster on the ceiling of Declan's room, one that he and Benjamin had found on eBay. They also got a John Terry as a seller's bonus, which was still sitting unopened in one of Declan's rooms. (Benjamin didn't think it was necessary to get a poster he wasn't going to buy or put up, but Declan, somewhat grimly, replied that Frank and John were a set.)

 

 

 

 

*

 

Martin Odegaard didn't give up in a strange part: he decided to learn French. Benjamin and Declan bought him a conversation book as a gesture of goodwill. They also gave Mikel Arteta a Norwegian conversation book at the same time, which he was puzzled by, but agreed to practice with them.

 

Declan had pored over French conversation books and colored with highlighters sentences like I love you, do you have time, oh, you're beautiful, shall we go to the movies, and so on, but Martin didn't seem to notice. Still, they were proud of their efforts; in their minds, their kind Martin deserved to be as happy as he wanted to be.

 

 

*

 

Just as he forgot his badminton racket, Martin Odegaard soon forgot to study French. He didn't need to. Benjamin no longer spoke French and started talking to Mikel in English, which meant that Martin didn't have to worry about whether they were talking to Vincent Cassel or Xabi Alonso.

 

 

*

 

On top of that, Mikel Arteta's departure date is already a week away.

 

 

 

 

It was early in the evening, after a meal and a movie with Declan, when Benjamin White got the sad call. They had decided that Martin and Mikel's choice of semisweet churros wasn't very tasty and had switched to nachos. The offer of cheese sauce with the purchase of two bags of nachos made Declan overspend, and Benjamin clicked his tongue at himself for falling prey to big business. The bag of nachos was big, too big. So they put it in the cupboard, thinking they should take one to Martin and Mikel. Of course, it was just a thought. It was bothersome to carry the nachos, even though they are right next door.

 

This time, the movie they chose was neither a action-thriller nor a romantic comedy. The former is Benjamin's favorite and the latter is Declan's, and they decided to take turns watching the movie of the other's choice. That was a great idea for a month with four weekends, but when there were five weeks, it became a real problem. So they asked the AI for recommendations. To their surprise, the AI recommended Ghibli animation. The two of them were annoyed at being teased, but as the story progressed, they found themselves getting hooked.

 

 

The phone that had died a spectacular death between Benjamin and the ping-pong table and the floor had been forgotten by both of them. Benjamin had grown accustomed to the phone the store'd given him to use while they looked into getting it fixed. He'd seen the text message asking him to return it, but he'd ignored it. The UK is slow at work, and Benjamin White's work is sometimes slower than the UK average. Anyway, he has to buy a new phone.

 

Benjamin glanced back and forth between his phone and Declan, who was cheering on Totoro as he set off to find little Mei. So much for the North London Forever ringtone. Suddenly, he recalled Martin's phone, which was even worse than his own, and wondered if Martin'd changed it. It didn't look like he had, but he can't ask now anyway. If he ask now, he'd have to give him nachos, and besides, Martin had been sick the last few days. Before he knew it, Mikel's departure is four days away.

 

 

Buying a new phone is a daunting task. Benjamin needed a phone, not a computer, but there are so many features that tempted him. Benjamin wanted to get an entry-level iPhone, but Declan begged him to get the Pro. Even though Benjamin is paying for it, Declan is excited. Declan explained how many features the Pro has and how convenient it is for Instagram.

 

 

 

When she smiled broadly instead of answering, Benjamin jumped to his feet and headed for the door. "Ben! Hey, Benjamin!" He heard Declan call his name from behind him. He don't know why, but he is facing a huge fear, that something couldn't be expressed. As he passed a coffeehouse, a flower shop, and a couple of clothing stores, Benjamin realized he had done something terrible to the relationship he had barely begun to build.

 

 

*

 

Declan Rice was dumbfounded. As Benjamin stormed out of the store without a second thought, an eerie silence settled over the room. Declan froze in his tracks when he noticed a young man over there, displaying cell phone accessories, looking at him in a very pitiful way. But it couldn't be helped. He is right to feel sorry for him now. Declan stormed out of the store, telling the clerk, whose name he didn't even know, that the guy who just ran off is never his boyfriend, that he is a man who respected minority rights. Suddenly, the wind is cold.

 

The house was also very cold. Declan and Benjamin's house was usually moderately warm, so this was a very unfamiliar sensation. Declan felt nervous and embarrassed. He hesitated for a moment, wandered around, and eventually made his way next door. Martin Odegaard had been getting sicker and sicker as Mikel Arteta's departure date approached. Even if he took Martin to a doctor, who wouldn't find a cure. It is a lovesick.

 

 

Martin is sick in bed, but he is still singing Mikel's praises. Not wanting to go empty-handed, Declan grabbed a bag of nachos and a can of soup. Declan usually walks in unannounced and takes the couch. Seeing that he's not himself, Martin pulls back the covers and pokes his head out. Declan felt bad again, but he can't throw away the soup Mikel had made for poor Martin. If he did, Martin might get sick quickly and throw him out. So he put the can in the cupboard.

 

 

As he watched Martin jump out of bed, Declan was instantly overcome with a strange feeling. Sorrow? Appreciation? He sank to the floor and suddenly started picking at his nachos. It is really embarrassing.

 

 

*

 

 

 

*

 

Martin Odegaard first met Mikel Arteta at an internship seminar while he was living in San Sebastian. After immigrating to Spain, he thought he had made it in the world on his own, but he was lonely. Especially when he was suffering from the unnecessary sadness that his hometown was somehow too far away and that no one seemed to care about him. Anybody, sombody.

 

Martin had a wistful look on his face. Declan is a little annoyed. He'd been talking about breaking up with Benjamin (he don't really have anyone else to talk to), and he wondered why the conversation had suddenly turned to Martin's fond memories of Mikel. Martin is a really nice guy, but when the subject of Mikel comes up, he suddenly changes a bit. Declan think he'll just break up with Benjamin without his advice.

 

 

A lonely animal will eventually be comfortable with touch, so don't try to tame it, you'll be in trouble. When Martin Odegaard concluded that he had fallen in love with Mikel Arteta, he was very puzzled and felt giddy, which was a feeling he had never experienced before in his life. It was almost a natural disaster: he had never had any doubts about his sexual identity, so of course he didn't like other men. Martin had been a hetero for twenty years of his life, and he even had a girlfriend at the time. Wait a minute.

 

Declan Rice had forgotten why he had come to see Martin Odegaard, and he felt a little guilty when he remembered that he had once believed that Martin had gone from being a plant-sexual or asexual to a mikel-sexual, and that he had even wondered if Martin can't get it up. The whole story is fascinating. Martin had a girlfriend! Declan couldn't wait to tell Benjamin about it. (Martin won't mind if he tell B, will he? Please! It's a secret smaller than the ping-pong table!) And he soon felt a little down again: should I tell Benjamin this story and then break up with him, or should I tell him this story after breaking up with him? He can't figure out the order.

 

The bottom line is that Martin broke up with his girlfriend. But that didn't mean he couldn't tell Mikel about it and ask him to go out with him. Mikel was pretty and kind, but a little scary, and above all, too much for Martin. So he took his advice and started studying again. To become a better hottie (not that it mattered, in Declan's opinion).

 

Martin's saddest thought was that Mikel must not have been thinking about him while he was struggling so much. What comforted him was the cactus he started to grow around that time, and the plants became more and more varied. Plants and aromatherapy are important to him, too.

 

 

 

 

 

But no matter how hard Declan thinks about it, Benjamin White seemed to have taken a hundred steps ahead of Martin Odegaard. But as soon as he heard Declan's simple conclusion that things would work out with Mikel, Martin's fever began to rise again. He pulled the covers back over his head. "I should have told him, I don't think I can say it now, I'm going to spend the rest of my life missing Mr. Arteta alone forever, am I going to die?" Martin suddenly began to make logic jumps. Declan went to the kitchen and started to heat up the soup Mikel had made. He felt like such an asshole for thinking about throwing it away. And if he did, he would never get out of this house alive.

 

 

*