Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Before this story starts, Vi wanted to clarify one thing: She tried being better than this. Really, she did.

For weeks now, dragging into months, she's been trying very hard to ignore it, to be a good girlfriend. 

This wasn't something that happened overnight. It was something that had always been there, lurking around the depths of her. But like most things, had been pushed off on the account of her family dying, the whole prison thing, then the whole war thing, and generally too much heartbreak to really explore anything about herself.

Only now, it was starting to become a problem. A very dumb, miserable sort-of problem. Almost too embarrassing to even say out loud.

Vi wasn't perverted. She wanted to make that very clear. But sometimes, she'll admit, she had certain thoughts that were...maybe too impure to put into words. Impulses, urges, little fleeting fantasies. Ones that never lingered long, but lingered nonetheless.

She knew a pretty girl when she saw one. It was mindless at first, the way she wondered what they might look like under their clothes. How their legs might feel around her waist. How quickly they could change from a stranger to this...beautiful, pathetic thing, begging to come undone.

She never meant to think like such a dog, but sometimes it just happened. Especially after Stillwater, what that did to her.

The girls there always preferred to be used than anything else, it was more efficient that way. Less dangerous, more of a thrill. No one had time for doting and fawning and falling in love, there was just…fucking and getting on with your day.

Then along came Caitlyn, and suddenly everything flips upside down. 

Vi knew a pretty girl when she saw one. She thought all the usual dirty thoughts, even going as far as to tease her about it in the brothel. She was hot, probably looked like a dream under those dumb shoulder-pads. She wondered about those lips, kissing her, seeing what would reveal beneath those dark eyebrows when they weren't angled down on her, firm and determined.

But what was strange, and slightly terrifying, was that the more time Vi spent with her, the less those thoughts occurred. 

It was all...weird. She didn't want to kiss her just to get those hands under her dress. She wanted to kiss to her so those hands might...touch her cheeks instead. So she could enjoy the feeling of being held, being warmed by her. Being listened to, made to feel safe. What she felt for Caitlyn went beyond any of those urges she always had, beyond anything she's ever wanted from someone.

She forgot about them for a while now. Most of their time together was just them being partners, in the most mundane sense of the word.

Talking over each other’s day while getting undressed, sharing the same living space without any real acknowledgement of it. Most days they only saw each other in the morning and at night when Caitlyn came home from the station—except for the few cases when Vi was called in for some extra muscle.

It was a proper relationship, a proper routine. It worked well because they worked well.

So, Vi was really starting to hate herself, because she could feel herself reverting back to her old ways. The same way she itched for a drink or a fistfight sometimes. The rising hunger, the dirty impulses.

Only all of them, every single one, involved her.

The one girl that demanded more respect than any woman she ever fucking knew. 

And all Vi could think about was fucking her in most dirty, disrespectful ways possible. 

So, you see the fucking problem.

Vi knew that they've worked so hard to rebuild this relationship into something real, something meaningful and safe. It had taken so long to get to this point. She didn't want to mess up what they had, not when she didn't even really understand what she wanted from her.

Well, Vi knew what she wanted. But she didn't understand the logic behind wanting to fuck her girlfriend senseless whenever she was sleeping, or eating breakfast, or reading quietly on the couch. Without her even noticing.

There was just something about having her here, so pretty and so untouched. It drove her wild that Caitlyn was like this doll, this perfect little thing walking around, and yet she wasn't getting treated like it. It made Vi feel useless. A complete waste of a girlfriend. 

But maybe Vi had just assumed that Caitlyn wasn’t very sexually active...

They had shared a few nights together already, but she never really spoke about it much. It was simply something shared and then they were back doing all the other things they enjoyed together. The sex was still relatively new, normal. Not nearly as explored or frequent as Vi secretly wanted, and then felt terrible about, because that shouldn't even be considered a problem in their relationship.

She felt like banging her head into the wall. She didn't know when she became so pathetically horny that she couldn't even get through a single conversation anymore. Not without wondering what Caitlyn might look like under those clothes, how she might react if Vi had her right then and there—before she even realized what was going on.

Maybe it was all the years alone, the neglect, the dreams of having someone that made her this way. So unsatisfied and stuck with this big, disgusting need to please.

But she couldn't live with Caitlyn and not feel this way.

So, Vi decided to confront her during her afternoon tea-time. She was always in a good mood then, so it felt safe, promising.

Caitlyn didn't have many days off, but she always found herself watching the airships by the window, waiting patiently for her tea to steep. The sunlight always crested in the perfect place, casting rays of orange and pink over her cheekbones, those dark eyelashes. She always looked so beautiful here, thinking about nothing.

"Hey gorgeous."

Caitlyn blinked from the window, as if pulled from a trance. She rubbed her eye, wiping away the sleep lingering in the corners.

"Oh. Hi," She tapped the ceramic teapot in front of her as though she forgot about it, testing the warmth of it. "Did you want some tea? I can make another cup."

Vi didn't like tea. Never really had. Caitlyn knew this, but she always asked her anyways. Still so polite, after all this time.

"Nah, I'm okay," Vi chuckled, stuffing her hands in her pockets, how fidgety they were. "Um, you busy?"

"Not particularly, just something about this case that’s bothering me," Caitlyn sighed, resting her chin in her palm. She waved off the thoughts, giving her full attention instead. "What's up?"

Vi hesitated now, because she really was too cute to be asking for this. She felt the guilt welling up, coating her throat. "Actually, I just wanted to...ask something. Um. And you can totally say no if you don't want to, but yeah. I guess I've just been thinking about it lately, uh..."

The words drifted off as Caitlyn warmed her hands around her cup, waiting patiently for her to continue. She didn't notice her blush. Vi rested against the small table, a bit uncomfortably— now noticing the lace tablecloth she'd inherited from her mother, the fancy set of teacups and candy dishes.

This was one of her favorite spots in the house, the only little corner she had for herself. Something Vi should probably leave alone, so she could enjoy it alone, and yet...

"Can I, uh...go down on you? Here?"

There was a pinch in those eyebrows, a familiar one. As if Caitlyn didn't hear properly, or simply didn’t approve. "Excuse me?"

"You know just…while you drink your tea?" Vi suggested, chewing on her cheek now.

She tried to make this all sound casual, but she was quickly learning that was impossible to someone like Caitlyn, who never did anything casually.

Like sex, in particular...

For a moment, neither of them said anything. Not until Caitlyn sat up straighter, still slightly processing.

Her cheeks went pink, trying hard to speak again. "You...you're serious?"

Vi wasn’t sure how she was taking this. She did all she could do.

She nodded, with a small shrug.

"Right now?"

Another nod, more obvious. Vi glanced underneath the table and back up, smirking, so she'd get the idea. 

Caitlyn had her mouth hung open, but nothing made it out. It was unbearably cute, but Vi held on. Waiting for her, her permission.

"I haven't really..." She began with a nervous laugh, but something stopped that short.

Maybe it was the knowing tilt of Vi's head, or the gleam in her eye. Like they both knew what was coming next. The excuses, the nerves. Ready to explain how she hadn't bathed yet today, or made herself pretty, or prepared herself mentally for any of this.

But, that was kind of the point. 

She blushed deeper once realizing this. Caitlyn laughed again, but not like because she found any of this funny. More because she wasn't sure how to respond to such a bold request. If she should be offended or flattered that she would ever be this easy.

Vi kept quiet, trying not to cave to the feelings of embarrassment. Fighting the urge to say nevermind, apologize, try to play it off as a random weird thought. Maybe turn out of the room with her tail between her legs, just go touch herself in the shower like everyone else did when they were horny.

But Vi didn’t want to touch herself. Those weren’t the urges she was having.

There was a difference between wanting to fuck someone, and then wanting to be fucked. And working some dumb little vibrator on herself wasn't going to do shit for her. Vi knew what she wanted, it was all she ever thought about anymore.

Caitlyn finally closed her mouth, once noticing the gleam in her eye. Hesitantly, she uncrossed her legs. Her hands slowly following underneath, mostly out of habit, while her thighs pressed together.

Okay, then.

Vi felt a flutter in her belly, one that worked itself up and up, until it stretched across her lips. She tried to keep that grin from spreading from ear to ear, but not when she just got the go-ahead. That itch eager now, anticipating the scratch. 

Within seconds, Vi dropped to her knees. She crawled under the tablecloth, heart thumping, excited for what she might find below. Caitlyn always liked her frilly little dresses, and Vi had liked her in them too—probably more than her, to be honest. 

It took a bit of maneuvering and a few fingertaps to get those hips lifted, but eventually Vi glides her panties off her ankles. A kiss pressed lightly on her knee, her skin already twitching there, sensitive.

Somehow Caitlyn not seeing any of this made her even more lost, unsure what she should even be focusing on.

She soon discovered her answer to that very stupid question, because Vi adjusted her into the position she wanted—and all she can feel is those large hands under her thighs, tugging her further down the chair. She held on to her armrest as there was some shuffling between her thighs, spreading them open.  

And with a few gentle nips of teeth, gliding down her thighs, Vi finally buried herself into her. Satiating that hunger, all those little fantasies of pushing that skirt up her thighs, tasting her when she felt like it. In a perfect world, she wouldn't even have to ask Caitlyn to do this. It would be more of a...surprise. But this was already better than anything else Vi had imagined.

She let her lips drift along her folds with no aim, no real intent. Only pressing down when she pleased, when the scent heightened along with that desire, moving into very long, languid presses.

It was all very patient, very delicate. As though Vi were...enjoying herself. There was a soft sigh against her clit, something like relief.

With nothing else to do, Caitlyn cautiously sipped her tea. It was already lukewarm, sitting there for who knows how long. But slowly, as Vi worked herself up, she could feel herself relaxing under the table. Her legs spreading, ever so slightly, so Vi could lap against her more, press her nose up at the perfect angle.

With a sigh, Caitlyn began petting her soft, pink hair, allowing her hips to move in pace of those kisses. She leaned up more, let her clit drag along her tongue. Vi felt nothing but pride swelling up at all the appreciative touches. Every lick turning into a smile now, thinking she likes it, she likes it.

Both of those thighs found themselves lifted up over each shoulder, and Caitlyn had to bury her hand into her hair, hold on for purchase. The other already fisted into the tablecloth, panting somewhere above.

But as much as she wanted to, Vi didn't slow down or speed up. Didn't move an inch. She dragged her tongue and bridge of her nose over the same sensitive spot, over and over. Guiding that build in her, working it, until those thighs by her ears started trembling. Until she got so wet that Vi was drowning in her, dripping down her chin, moaning into whatever drug was in this girl’s scent. Until her walls opened so beautifully, allowing her tongue, riding for more, more, until that knee suddenly jerked against the table.

There was a small squeak and a clumsy clatter of porcelain, before all went silent. An embarrassed silence.

Vi poked her head out from under the lace, finding a very wide, discolored pair of eyes. Caitlyn was still breathless, beautifully flushed. Too surprised to do anything but stare, with that adorable gap in her teeth. 

She didn’t speak a word. She just came in her mouth, yet here she was, so completely confused, her cheeks rosy and glowing. But pleased, so very pleased.

With a job well done, Vi beamed and ducked back under the table. She shuffled those panties back on for her, pulled those white frills so it covered her neatly. Then she crawled out and stood up, rubbing fidgety, excited hands on her pants.

“Thanks,” She grinned sheepishly, rubbing at the tip of her nose. 

Caitlyn stared up at her, completely lost. Her mouth opened and fell back shut. "You're...welcome?" 

Without another word, Vi stalked off down the hallway, fleeing her gaze with a few awkward steps.

She disappeared around the corner, and Caitlyn heard the bathroom door locking shut then, followed by the shower running on high pressure. She glanced to her teacup as she waited, carefully draining the rest of it— unsure if she really was hearing those few muffled sounds over the water...

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Another problem Vi had was mornings.

In her defense, she never really dreamed anymore. Not since Stillwater, when she found the best way to pass the hours was by scratching them into a wall; and not since the pitfights, when she found the dark bottomless bliss that was the inside of a bottle.

Nowadays when Vi woke, she would find herself in these dazed, half-dream states. Fantasizing things that almost always ended with her drooling into the pillow.

Most of them had to do with the girl laying right next to her; her scent buried into the sheets Vi would rub her cheek against. A plethora of Ionian perfumes, oils, earthy tea leaves. The smells of midnight hair, and warm nights at home.

Not that she would ever admit it, but Caitlyn had also gotten lazy these last few months. She was always an early riser but Vi hated mornings, and sunlight, so she never really made the effort to get up until both were less "aggressive and in her face", as she put it.

They didn’t have to worry about things like that in the sumps. There was no rising sun, no chirping birds. There wasn’t a sky to tell you what time to do things. "You just got up and fuckin’ did them," Vi would grumble.

Caitlyn never approved, claiming all sorts of things about sleep schedules and mental health. Something they bickered about but never really took seriously.

Eventually she found it endearing enough to let slide. Sometimes Caitlyn even watched the girl finally get some real sleep.

She decided that seven years of concrete floors and metal cells, then another two of dingy Zaun motel rooms, clouded with grey and spotted with mold, there was nothing she liked watching more than this— Vi finally curled up under a big blanket, buried into silken sheets. It was too precious, every argument that came to mind simply vanished.

No one appreciated the simple things in life like Vi did. It made Caitlyn appreciate them as well.

After a while she would get bored and put on some coffee for herself, something to pass the early hours while she lazed in bed, flipping through case notes on the pillow. It had been slightly hard to focus, lying there on her stomach. Most of her thoughts had been lingering back to Vi lately, or more specifically— what she had done under her grandmother's table.

Her fingers still tingled thinking about it. Distracting her from paperwork, her daily travels across the bathysphere. Nothing else had changed much, but there was something in the air. Lingering. A tension? Not in a negative way, necessarily, just…

She didn’t know. Which was especially frustrating, because Caitlyn Kiramman wasn't one easily stumped. She had no idea why she was so tongue-tied about it.

With other women in her past, she was the one who dictated the bedroom, who set the boundaries. She was very particular about what she enjoyed, what she allowed to be done to her. 

But most of that was before Violet. 

Maybe Caitlyn was realizing now that she wasn't very great with expressing what she wanted...emotionally, at least. In the bedroom, and those moments.

She didn’t know why she felt so feeble about it. Why she couldn’t come out and confess that whatever Vi did down there was some of the best sex they've ever had. Not just recently, but in their entire relationship. It didn't sound much like a compliment.

They’ve made love before, they’ve tousled and rolled around and held each other, but nothing stuck with her like that.

No, no. That was unexpected. And confusing, and strange. But, new?

And she couldn’t stop thinking about it.

She thought she knew all these sides of Violet, but this went beyond her secret talents in the kitchen and delicate singing voice. No, no. This was something...deeply undiscovered.

But she could see the moments, every now and again. These glimpses of Violet, her desires. Little clues…

At first, she thought nothing of it. When Caitlyn would hear little sounds coming from the blankets beside her. A few sighs, rustling sheets. Vi was a restless sleeper, it wasn’t entirely unusual for her. But that was before Caitlyn had decided to peek under the blanket that one day, her cheeks burning at what she found below.

Pillows. At least two, stuffed under her body and between her legs. That and a lot of…movement against them. Her hips, grinding circles down into the mattress. Slow, lazy strokes that matched each sigh of her pillow. An impressive rhythm, to Caitlyn's surprise.

And she wasn’t even awake. The blanket quickly dropped soon after. 

It wasn’t every morning this happened, but…well. Often enough. And every time Caitlyn couldn’t help but watch, laying there with her notebook. Thinking about how it might feel to be one of those pillows, curled into her bicep, while picking at a few loose ends of her hair…

She didn’t want to interrupt though, there was no need to embarrass her or make her feel ashamed by it. But it had been happening a lot. Even before the tea-time surprise, though the two occurrences felt related somehow.

The bed shifted as Vi mumbled beside her, hidden beneath all the layers. Caitlyn quickly went back to her notes, pretending not to notice Vi finally waking up. Her hand had a funny habit of peeking from beneath the blanket, patting along the sheets, until it found home along her back. Vi had gotten spoiled always having Caitlyn wrapped into her arms when they slept, she didn't like waking up empty-handed. 

The blanket sighed then, relieved. Her thumb soothed circles over her dress. A small slip of a thing that was gifted very proudly one anniversary. It had also come with a matching pair of panties, or a thong really, but Caitlyn simply stuck to her own there. This short, pathetic excuse of a nightgown was plenty compromise enough.

…And she hadn't minded wearing it more often.

Maybe since after the whole tea-time affair, which still went entirely unspoken about, Caitlyn had been…thinking lately. Curious. Wanting to try some things, some little questions she had. 

Similarly, Vi had been more affectionate these last few mornings, too. Ever since that day. Particularly by pressing lazy, featherlight kisses along her neck, her back, the space between her shoulder blades. She always found a way to crawl onto her slowly, still half-asleep. The blanket dragging along with her, naturally.

Her weight was always happily accepted. Caitlyn adored the way her frame could cover her completely. Those shoulders, the large expanse of her back. It was only a shame she couldn’t see the tattoos decorating them.

Those hands moved with a mind of their own, little thumb-shaped presses down by her hips. The silky fabric smoothing over her skin, something to feel her, say good morning.

Vi toyed with the hem near her thighs, gently stroking beneath. Drifting further and further in, as if expecting some kind of friction along the way, searching for it…

Caitlyn paused, pen between her teeth, as Vi leaned to glance beneath the blanket.

She could hear the moment Vi found nothing there. Fingertips drifting, along with the silence, when the seam kept going, and going, only to find more nothing.

Vi glanced up carefully at her. But Caitlyn kept her cheek in her palm, turned another page. Hips shifting ever so slightly. Which could mean nothing. Or possibly everything, with the way that thump hit her belly.

“...fuck,” came a whisper. Caitlyn smirked when that weight covered her again, a sleepy little hum by her ear. 

She was thanked with a few squeezes along her body, thumbs brushing by her bare breasts, still pressed into the pillow. More kisses fluttered down her dress and that weight on her was determined to settle down, right on the glistening tell between her thighs.

Vi moved her hips lazily then, pressing her into the mattress with no real thought. Just something that made her feel good. She nestled herself into the crook of Caitlyn's exposed neck, soft pink hairs tickling her cheek with each shift. Her core warming with each one, melting into the lovely suffocation.

For a minute or so, Caitlyn simply listened the pleased sighs from over her shoulder. Not really gaining too much from this, but happy that Vi was enjoying herself.

It felt…strangely empowering? She didn’t have to say a word, she didn't have to do anything. The only reaction she slipped was a giddy smile, pressed into her palm.

The notes seemed a lost cause now, the words had been blurred for who knows how long. But she kept on pretending, clenching the notebook, because it seemed Vi liked it like that. That she was ignoring her, or somewhat clueless that she was even there. Which should be laughable, but Caitlyn quickly saw the attractiveness of it.

It was like a game, almost. How little she moved, the lack of reaction to her. All of this was part of it. She could tease Vi like this without even looking at her.

But then the rest of her dress shifted up, before that thought could even finish.

She was bare within seconds, heart pounding as fingers dug into her hips, some breath pushed into her ear. Not pleased anymore, just frustrated. A sudden arm snaked between her and the bed, and Vi tugged her up effortlessly into her hips. Both of their knees spreading wide, as if on command. 

Caitlyn gasped as Vi mounted her. Her blood flowing hot, flushing her cheeks as her head hit the pillow. She bit her lip, immediately embarrassed by the weak noise. But she could feel Vi adjusting herself like she wasn’t done. That other arm sliding between her and the pillow now, curled against her throat.

Those soft pink locks returned, shushing along her ear. Before any warning could slip out, any breath. Over and over. As though she were nothing but some helpless animal, needing to be broken. 

Caitlyn swallowed thickly, eyes sliding closed. Not knowing what to do. Her bicep was hard, impossible to move from. Which was funny, because those muscles always seemed to be for show whenever it came to her; Vi was always too sweet to really use them.

But she didn't seem to notice her own strength now, as mindless as she was, and it did make something nervous flutter, because Caitlyn didn't know what Vi wanted to do here. What she wanted from her.

This was all very different from the way Vi practically worshipped her in the bedroom. It was in her fists, her breathy pants. Every move was instinctual, determined. Shameless, for once.

It continued when that arm around her waist moved, gliding further down, until her fingers brushed along what she really wanted. One touch, and they could both feel it. How wet she was. Caitlyn didn't even know when that happened, just that her mind went fuzzy, weak.

She tested a few deep, generous strokes. It felt like the air she couldn't breathe, like mind-numbing relief. Vi was always so gentle despite her size, those large hands and hard knuckles. Even now, she took care with the way she pressed further down. When she could feel the way Caitlyn warmed for her, spread her knees more. Her hips trembling now, trapped and eager.

Her eyes squeezed as Vi pushed two fingers deep, curling them inside. A stifled noise rippled up her throat, but all Caitlyn could feel was those words again, hushed along her ear, "Shh...easy, easy."

She waited until Caitlyn obeyed. Until she settled down and huffed into her elbow, finally just accepting her.

Only then did Vi start up again, gently curling those fingers up into her. Her hips moving to match, guiding the pace, so Caitlyn couldn't do anything but bury her head into her arm, the little black notebook now falling into the crack of the bed.

Every sense she had vanished. Her hearing, her sight, blinded by touches as Vi filled her, stroking her walls, petting that sensitive little spot so deep inside. She was getting so wet she could feel her mouth opening, her legs, unable to hide the soft squelching of her arousal, while Vi pressed into her back like all she wanted was to get closer, melt into her, bury her into the sheets.

Yes, Caitlyn had noticed it lately. Vi hadn’t been fucking her hard, just very thoroughly.

Enough to make Caitlyn pant into her elbow, cheek pressed against her bicep. Trying not to claw into those tattoos on her forearm, whimper and bite as Vi worked her like this. She had such deep, perfect little strokes. It was maddening, the way they could hear it. The way the only words left in her head were please, please, please, fuck—

Her hips twitched but Vi didn't stop. Not when Caitlyn gripped those pink locks over her shoulder, when Vi could feel her leaking down her palm into the mattress. When the sounds of Caitlyn getting wetter, weaker, breaking apart, fueled Vi in ways she didn't think possible. All those little whimpers she cried into her arm just made her go harder, pressuring her throat, burning any sense of herself that wasn’t there to please.

Caitlyn squirmed as Vi rode her but nothing could stop it. She didn't want her to stop it. She was trembling and sweaty down her spine; she think she came already, but she couldn’t tell when the pleasure just kept coming, and coming.

Then everything felt hot, her bones going weak, and that’s when she knew. When that second wave washed over, clenching on her fingers, riding down into this soft but spectacular finish. The kind that muddled her brain, made it impossible to lift her head. 

But Vi still didn't let up. She didn’t even notice. She just kept going and going, overexcited with the scent. The way she gave in. Her hips grinding down, down into her, thrusting her into the mattress and adjusting herself, as if readying for a third orgasm after Caitlyn barely survived the first two. 

Everything was shaking, hazy from overexertion. She couldn't feel her legs. She couldn't breathe with the way her pussy throbbed now, it's never been so tortured like this. "Baby," The word was sticky, hot. Stuck in her throat. Her bicep only tightened at the sound, and she tried tapping out instead, whining, "Baby!"

One crack of her voice, and everything stopped. Those hips, her hand. Vi lifted herself from her neck, blinking herself awake, as if she finally realized this wasn’t some pillowy dream.

It took a few seconds, and some sunlight, but eventually her brain caught up. "Shit,” She panted, eyes going wide. “I’m sorry baby, I’m sorry—”

Vi quickly loosened her arm, detangling herself from the headlock she had on her. Her fingers pulled out at the same time, a few sympathetic circles soothing over her again, before Caitlyn winced and she pulled away.

“I guess I was…” She didn’t know what to say. What kind of excuse she had for this, she just went on sputtering, “I-I was just…um…”

“…enjoying yourself?” Caitlyn attempted, glancing back at her. It was the first time they met eyes all morning. 

Vi blushed, failing to speak. But she couldn’t help the smile that peeked out, as embarrassed as she was. Her head pressed into her back, hiding from her. “Yeah.”

“...That’s okay,” Caitlyn blew a hair from her cheek, finally able to take a few deep breaths. “I think I might just be a little, uh…sensitive, now? If that's alright?”

“No, no. Right, yeah,” Vi was all kisses then, as if to say sorry. Or thank you. “You okay?”

“I’m great,” Caitlyn laughed, chest heaving, “Just…tired.”

She felt a grin then, kissing the sweat on her neck, across her shoulder and cheekbone. Those hands smoothed her slip back down, gently covering what little it could. With a few cheeky squeezes, Vi hopped up out of bed.

The cold hit her suddenly, and Caitlyn would’ve complained again if it weren’t for the exhaustion. All she could do was watch as Vi left to tug at the dresser. She ruffled her hair in the mirror, tore off her shirt to get dressed. Somehow completely reinvigorated for the day while Caitlyn buried herself back into bed. 

The door shut to the bathroom, and her eyes closed to the sound of running water. It was strangely soothing, the chirping birds and morning light.

She must have dozed for a while, because she stirred to a few sudden kisses on her head. “Bye,” Vi chuckled, pressed against her ear.

A few more shuffling sounds, and the front door slammed. The apartment fell into silence, and Caitlyn couldn’t help but smile to herself in the pillow, feeling like she learned something new.

Perhaps this investigation was coming along well.

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It’s entirely possible that morning was a mistake.

Nevermind that Vi went about her day giddy as fuck afterwards, thinking about all the ways she had Caitlyn beneath her. All squirmy and desperate, trapped against her arm and practically drooling into it, just as Vi always secretly dreamed—

It was also important to note that Vi didn’t exactly mean to do it, and suddenly it felt embarrassing how carried away she got. From a wet dream, of all things. 

None of this was good. She was acting like some pent up, horny asshole. Which wasn’t anything new considering those last few years in Stillwater, but it was to Caitlyn. Luckily, she did seem to enjoy cumming nearly three times all so Vi could dreamily get off on it, but there were still slips in the cracks. The glances Vi stole, the dreams she had that apparently she couldn’t hide.

There was just something about her presence, her scent, about her that drew Vi in. It had always been there whenever they were together, but that was back when there was always something barred between them, a fear, a misunderstanding; when the world had convinced Vi their differences were too great.

They’d never been stuck between four walls like this. Never really assumed it was possible. That they could live their lives, so free from worldly differences and all expectation. When it really was just them now. With all the time they could dream of. All the freedom to want and desire, to finally do something about it. 

That stupid tea-time favor was supposed to help Vi get over this burst of excitement, these feelings, to stave them off, but all that did was make her already-touchy imagination act up even more. 

Vi just couldn’t get over it. The way she had her, the ways she could have her. Hearing Caitlyn moan like that practically gave her brain damage. An itch, an addiction. Something that altered her brain chemistry for good. She would get breathy, sometimes giggly but Caitlyn never really made that much noise. At all. 

Well, not like Vi did whenever she got herself going.

Her mind just kept skipping back to it, like some broken-record memory. Vi was dying to find out what else she'd been missing out on. But she didn't want to push or press, or force her way into this. She didn't want to take control unless Caitlyn really asked for it. But that was the entire problem, she could never see Caitlyn asking for anything. 

She never shied away from telling Vi what she wanted, how exactly she wanted it to be done. She was very particular about what she was passionate about, and Vi liked to think she qualified somewhere in there. If she said nothing, then that meant she was perfectly satisfied with the way things were.

Which was just so confusing. Especially now that Caitlyn was acting, again, like that morning never happened. Taking phone calls in her office at night, going to the station during the day.

Vi didn’t know what to make of it. Her. Her palms went all sweaty whenever she was around again, just like they always did. Before they were dating, before they even kissed, when everything was being said with their eyes. Mostly out of hope, if not fear, or some dangerous mix of the two. 

It felt like the beginning all over again.

Only this time, Vi was being weird. She couldn't stop being weird.

She could feel Caitlyn watching her sometimes when they were alone, as if waiting for something. But she still never said anything. They went to bed tucked up in each other's arms, like always, and kissed each other goodbye in the mornings, like always.

Well... Except that one time, when there was something about Caitlyn's perfume or the scented oil in her hair. Something always there but also so new. That urged that needy excitement in Vi's belly, smoothing fingers over her waist. Nosing her way back in to steal another kiss, this one deep enough to break the unspoken rule they always had.

That morning kisses were mindless, sweet. Polite. 

Caitlyn went strangely still in her arms. Her breath suddenly weak, along with the rest of her. She allowed a few more seconds, before it took two hands on Vi’s chest to will her away, “Okay, okay. I-I have to get going,” She laughed, petting down a few pink strands. “I can’t be late for work.”

Vi frowned as Caitlyn shuffled away for her briefcase and keys, rolling her eyes, “You mean on time, for once?”

With one last scrunch of her nose, Caitlyn left through the door for the day. Vi puffed into the silence that filled the entryway, rolling her neck back. Feeling bitterly lit up and somewhat abandoned, before the day had even started. 

So, Vi did what she always did when there was a handful of problems, and nothing left to do.

She went to the gym. She lifted weights, did some core exercises. Ran a few laps around the city, across the bridge and back, and made her way back to the gym, eager to step foot in the ring again; land a few blows here and there, just to make sure she wasn't getting sloppy.

Her heart was pounding by the end of it all. Her lungs burning and mind static, but she still didn't feel any better. Vi didn't know what was wrong with her, where all this energy or random anger was coming from. She didn't get why it felt so weird.

But maybe the answer was obvious. It wasn't anger at all, just frustration. All this stress coiled up inside her without any release in sight. Vi was pent up and no amount of hitting things was going to fix that.

But if anything, Vi was a fix-it-yourself kind of girl. So, she rushed home with another solution in mind. One that involved a stool and Caitlyn's little box of toys, hiding on the top shelf of her closet.

She wouldn't be home till late, so Vi had no problem diving onto the sheets, still panting and sweaty, and riding Caitlyn’s vibrator until her own voice broke into the sheets. 

Which was nice. For a whole thirty seconds.

It was a bandaid on a bigger problem, but it did bandage her well enough that Vi could live with it.

The revelation even added a somewhat ritualistic aspect to her routine, the adrenaline and arousal flooding her boxers by the time she made it home from her workouts. All of which seemed better than any kind of therapy, or bitching and moaning to Ekko about her (lack of) sex life.

Vi was never much of a talker anyways. Well, a decent shit-talker when it mattered, just not when it came to her own set of problems. Things always figured themselves out, somehow, someway. So long as her emotions and routines stayed regulated, controlled, just as she preferred. Stillwater had taught her that much. 

If anyone knew how to truly wait something out, it was her. 

So with this knowledge, you could imagine how alarmed Vi felt coming home to noises in the kitchen, when no one was supposed to be home. She had just finished up a good session at the gym, still breathing hard and ready for a quick tousle in the sheets, before hopping into an even quicker shower. 

Vi made her way into the kitchen area, more confused than scared of whoever was hiding around the corner. She expected to see some kind of nefarious rat, or maybe some asshole kid from the block breaking in to bother her about boxing lessons again. It wasn't either.

What she found was Caitlyn Kiramman behind a stove. Wearing nothing but one of her oversized workout shirts, skirting past her thighs. Bare down to her feet.

Which had to be another dream, surely. But it wasn't.

"Oh," Vi said, a bit stupidly. That glance went back towards the bedroom. "You're uh… you’re home?"

"Am I not supposed to be?" Caitlyn asked, chopping what looked like green scallions next to a pot. A boiling pot.

Which was weird. Vi was always the one to cook dinner. Not because Caitlyn wouldn’t, but well. It was one of the few skills she never came into…

Vi didn't say anything. Just used her teeth to take off her gloves, biting the velcro straps. She tucked one under her arm, stretching her fingers, tossed the other onto the counter.

"Truthfully, I’ve had enough of that Chief Sergeant Vikery hovering over my desk all hours of the day, so I decided to finish some paperwork at home instead of the office," Caitlyn went on, as if reading her mind. 

She caught her eye then, hesitating, as she noticed the winded flush on Vi’s cheeks, the sleeveless outfit, trailing down to her sweatpants.

Her hands wiped carefully on a towel. "Um… Should be ready in around ten or so?"

Vi nodded, without a word. She leaned over the sink to refill her thermos, trying to ignore the impatience that ticked her jaw.

But she couldn’t fume over the fact that her own girlfriend was home, happily cooking dinner for them. While wearing one of her own shirts. And whatever else Vi already imagined was beneath it, not that she didn’t already fucking know.

This was so unfair.

The tap ran as Caitlyn turned then, ready to ask if she was hungry— but something stopped that sentence. When she caught the way Vi dozed against the counter, drinking from her bottle. Already staring at her.

Those gray eyes flicked up, and suddenly Caitlyn had a feeling she was. Just not for whatever was boiling on the stove.

Neither of them moved for a moment, or spoke.

Now Caitlyn had gotten used to reading Vi over the last few months they'd been together, the details in her expressions, but lately it had been harder. Not as though Vi were hiding something, but...sorting through something.

Vi glanced away first, shaking her head after a while. The tap twisted off with a squeak. “Alright, um. I’m gonna go shower.”

“Well…" Caitlyn interrupted, toes curling against the tile. She sputtered, "Aren't you interested in seeing what I’m making?”

Vi drifted back those few steps, offering a proud smile into the pot of what looked like vegetables, broth, some udon noodles. "Oh. No, yeah. Sorry. Smells good," She commented, drifting two hands along her sides. Her nose pressed towards her neck, "Mm. You do too."

“Why thank you,” Caitlyn hummed back, always attracted to that voice in her ear. “But I’m afraid flattery won’t make it taste any better.”

“Oh, it won’t?" Vi teased. "Is that why it looks like that then?” An elbow shoved back but she didn’t even budge. “I’m joking. Just surprised, that’s all. Since when do you cook for me?”

Caitlyn scoffed, as always when preparing to defend herself. That accent winding up, ready to name all the times she had to get up in the middle of the night just to feed Vi whatever cravings she lazily whined for. 

But nothing made it out. All of it got stuck, lost. When she could feel phantom fingers tangling in her hair. Brushing the strands over her shoulder, behind her neck. The way it all fit so perfectly into her palm, twisting around her fist. 

Everything in her stilled. Like a rabbit, caught in a snare.

Vi didn't really notice, too busy enjoying herself. But one playful tug, and Caitlyn nearly gasped. Once she felt the way her neck went limp, exposed. So pretty and relinquished, all in one second. 

Her cheeks flushed suddenly, embarrassed. But Vi didn’t move. She didn’t kiss, or nip her ear. Strong hips trapped her against the counter and all Vi could do was watch, fascinated by the small noise, the angle of her neck. The way those blue eyes fluttered shut, lips parting, smiling ever so slightly. Waiting–?

Oh.

Vi resisted every lit up nerve in her fingers. Her own affection blooming that Caitlyn would bare herself so easily like this. She was always so protective of her neck, always pinned up and cautious when performing her duties. The mere fact that she hadn’t swatted her off yet was astounding, but here she was. 

It felt like…permission. Barely. For Vi to lean in, breathe that indescribable scent she’d been noticing for days now. The one from the bedsheets. The pillows. All flowers and oil, emanating from her. A sweetness that Vi could taste. Riling her more than that dumb little vibrator could ever dream—

Fuck.

“Cait,” Vi rasped. Her voice was deep, gravelly. Desperate. “Can I…u-um…”

The rest of that sentence fisted on her hips, hard-locked and needy. But Caitlyn just turned her neck, grasped her jaw, and that kiss was all it took. For Vi to brush under the seam of that shirt, find the softness between her thighs.

The moan that came was instant, poured into Caitlyn’s mouth as Vi realized she had nothing on underneath. That she could slip between her folds and feel how wet she was already, waiting for her touch.

Caitlyn tried to stifle her gasp, hands grasping for balance on the stovetop, dangerously close to getting burned. But it was that fist in her hair that kept her from going anywhere. No, no. Those lips stayed exactly where Vi wanted them. Parted beautifully, hot and wet, and breathing onto hers.

“Careful,” Vi shushed her, smiling. She sacrificed a hand to slowly turn the dial on the stove, lowering it from a boil to a simmer. "Don't hurt yourself…”

Her eyes fluttered to watch those fingers disappear from the stove. Her hips and belly squirming on their own, as if they didn’t belong to her anymore. Like everything had awakened inside her, ready to come alive. 

But Vi didn’t bury those fingers back where she wanted, and all Caitlyn could do was pant helplessly into her mouth as that arm kept going, wounding around her body, those muscles hard and tight against her frame. 

Vi moved her back from the stove, like she were nothing but some doll to be picked up and placed, guiding their hips towards another counter she could be bent over. Caitlyn stumbled over the tile, still laughing breathlessly, helplessly, at that grip in her hair.

Both of them kept going, as if on instinct. No words spoken and yet Caitlyn was shoving utensils out of the way to brace herself— Vi shifting that oversized shirt up and over her chest, torn furiously overhead.

Even the sight of it was enough to get her wet, the way her breasts dropped to the open air. That curve in her back already arched perfectly into place. All smooth skin and long gorgeous hair spilling between her shoulders, flowing down her spine.

The view was godly, sinful. Pristine and ruinously dirty. Vi grinned softly to herself at it, in stupid, boyish relief.

She lined herself up behind her, taking a moment to appreciate the view. Gently stroking up her sides, delighting in her skin, the heavy weight of her tits, too tempting not to fit into her palm. She melted at the way they spilled between her fingers, how Caitlyn shivered at her thumbs, brushing over her nipples.

“Fuck,” Vi nearly whimpered, breathing kisses across her neck, her ear. This girl was fucking gorgeous, and waiting for her to-

Both of them shuddered at the thought, the delicious anticipation, rushing through their veins. Caitlyn’s knees were getting weak, lost in the way Vi groped her, worshipped her.

But then she whined something harsh, breathy, like it wasn’t enough. Something she wouldn’t say.

“What, baby?” Vi whispered, the words pushed into her ear. Caitlyn shuddered again, but still bit her lip shut. It made Vi want to hear her so badly. Her moans, her voice, whatever she had buried so deep within. 

A few nails dug into her wrist instead, a new demand, but they didn’t push Vi down towards her legs. They urged upwards, drifting a path along her throat, her neck, closing her fingers tightly.

“Right here?” Vi asked gently, swiping a thumb over her windpipe.

But Caitlyn was panting, desperately shaking her head. She clawed at those fingers again, trying hard to move them higher, up into the nape of her neck. Fingers tangling in the soft hairs.

Then Vi knew. She allowed her other hand to take place of the first one, brushing around her throat. Holding her still as she collected more of her hair, testing one firm pull of it.

And there was that sound. A grunt, or groan. Some purr, rumbling from deep inside her throat. Escaping onto her lips as a cheshire smile. A kind of reaction that Vi had never seen or heard before, not this loud, never this loud— right as she fisted hard on those strands.

Holy fuck. 

How did Vi not know about any of this…?

She could feel everything in her go limp again, trembling hard, pathetically aroused. The taste of it in the air, drifting from between her legs, those thighs squeezing hard as warm slick dribbled down. 

Vi barely had her hands on her, and already Caitlyn had given up.

It was everything she’d been furiously needing for days. Caitlyn writhing against her, grinding back against the sweaty fabric of her crotch. Losing all patience, any shame, as desire flooded her from the nape down.

Vi sacrificed the hand on her throat to drag it down her body, her lips and tongue quickly replacing the pressure. Fingers buried into Caitlyn’s coarse hair searching for softer skin and she could feel the way her body curved as she found her heat, hips driving forward to help push her inside.

One finger curled easily into her, another slipping close behind. Vi moaned into her shoulder, teething and smiling as those walls accepted her. The way they clenched so hard around her, pulsing with heat. Sucking her in as far as they would go.

She swirled around until every pump she tried buried into her. Until Caitlyn’s knuckles went white on the counter again, and little breaths began to push out from quiet lips. She was so deliriously wet they could hear it.

Vi melted onto her back at how delicious it sounded, her brain hot like molten gold, spilling over her shoulder. Caitlyn was too lost in her own pleasure to do anything but collapse over the edge, and Vi made sure to keep her lifted up, keep her knees from breaking, as her head and chest fell against the counter.

She tied that hair around her fist again, earned another broken whimper, something so sexy, so generous, that Vi had to curl up into that spot Caitlyn loved, so deep inside, just to deserve it.

Nothing filled her with more pride than how Caitlyn looked like this, how she had her right now. Bent over the counter, cheek pressed to the granite, practically limp as cum drenched her thighs. Finally being used, glorified, adored the way someone like her should be. 

But Vi needed to see her. To face her. To memorize every detail of those dark eyebrows, the bite of those lips, every window into her soul, doing this to her.

She waited until Caitlyn spasmed through another orgasm, overexcited with the scent again, the fight against her as eager arousal dripped down her hand. Her back curving deeply, that accent pleading with her, oh yes, yes, please—

But Vi hauled her back up, turning her around before she could finish properly. Caitlyn whined in protest but quickly allowed Vi to grasp her thighs, lift her easily up the counter. 

She wasn’t even sure if what she was looking at was real.

Those blazing blue eyes, the way every inch of her was spread out, on display, chest panting and beautiful. Vi sunk her first bite into the flesh of her neck. She marked down her chest hungrily, dragging her tongue over each breast, sucking hard enough to get a buck out of those hips, coating Vi’s shirt with hot slick.

It wasn't hard for Caitlyn to get what she wanted from her. How Vi wanted her. Arms around her neck, legs around her waist, hiked up so Vi could position her properly on her waistline. Let her core run against the hard lines of her sweatpants, up towards her abs. 

Everything was frenzied then, breathless, as their lips locked in blistering fury. All desperation and endless minutes of silence, the stovetop shrieking with steam and ultimately ignored. 

A fleeting thought begged for Vi to run for a packer, a strap, anything to lay this girl out properly— but Vi didn't even have the nerve to use her fingers anymore, they were so mindlessly turned on it felt more in the way than anything. 

No, no. This was too perfect, too real. Caitlyn bare and riding her waist, hair fanned out and tangled, breathing against her lips like she couldn't get enough. The trust she had in her expression, that downright adorable pinch in her brows when she let Vi lift her completely onto her hips, like she weighed nothing to her. Nails gripped hard into her shoulder, digging down with every deep, mesmerizing roll of her hips and— God. She moved like a dream Vi couldn’t wake from. 

“There you go,” Vi praised, feeling her immediately start to pick up speed, take control. Yes, yes, yes. 

Use me.

Vi only did as she was directed, making sure every thrust Caitlyn gifted was met perfectly on the most sensitive part of her. Adjusting her up, positioning her right, blindly grasping for any lost strands behind her back. She earned another gorgeous moan as Vi tugged her neck back, those hips stuttering hard before bucking harder, grinding her cunt into the soaked fabric.

Those fingers clenched, lost in damp pink hair. Her other hand squeezing her abs beneath the fabric, scratching up and down the muscles of her arm— all as Vi overstimulated her without even touching her. She rolled her hips desperately, rubbing her clit against Vi in greedy circles, shuddering and bouncing as the friction of her sweatpants made her dizzy, maddened with pleasure.

Those fingers turned into nails digging into her scalp, and Vi just grunted at the pain, trying not to whimper pathetically and leak down her boxers. 

She rode Vi until every inch of her body spasmed, grasping hard onto her head and forcing it back, just to pour that gasp onto her lips— the broken, breathy one Caitlyn always had as she came. The one Vi loved so much and missed so desperately, for days and days and days.

Vi drunk in every bit of it, intoxicated by her breath, those fluttering eyelashes; the feeling of that flow and spread across her waist, drenching her in warm, sticky happiness. She chuckled deeply from within, sighing at her. “There you go, gorgeous...”

Caitlyn was too out of breath to reply to that, but panted a weak smile anyway. Her legs tightened with an affectionate squeeze, delighting in the eye contact it seemed Vi always craved, needed, before those lovedrunk eyes shot wide open.

“Oh, Vi!” She scurried off the counter, rushing to turn off the shrieking stove.

She moved the steaming pot from the burner, hissing at the heat searing the handle. Then whirled back to Vi standing there in a smoking kitchen, trying to look completely clueless.

“Well there goes that,” She huffed, frowning at her pot. All the broth evaporated completely, the noodles nothing but a goopy brown sludge stuck at the bottom. “This is going to take ages to clean out, you know? This isn't exactly non-stick."

Vi had a guilty smile she tried hiding in her shoulder, wiping the sweat from her brow. “Shit, yeah… m'sorry, babe.”

“No, no. It’s okay,” Caitlyn insisted then, wiping her own sweat away. She swept a few sticky hairs behind her neck, as flushed and breathless as Vi was when she first walked in here.

Vi tried not to love the sight of it. The way Caitlyn now fretted over the stove, still completely naked, all glowy and used to perfection, with that petulant crease between her brow. The cute one that was always there whenever she had to step foot in the kitchen. 

She wanted to tug her back, to ravish her again so badly with her back turned like this. Maybe show her how sorry she was with another orgasm, this time on her knees— but somehow fucking her girlfriend senseless against the counter, again, while she just tried to make dinner... it seemed a bit like overkill.

That fire in Vi’s belly stoked and burned, chewing hard on her lip, but forced herself to push it all down. Swallowing that insatiable itch, that endless want.

No, no. Don’t push it…

“How about some takeout?” Vi suggested then, wiping a quick fist across her mouth. Hoping Caitlyn might take the bait to escape, before her mind changed. “You go order something, whatever you want. I’ll uh...clean this all up.”

Her shoulders dropped in sudden relief, standing there, and Vi melted at those big blue eyes. The way they softened just for her. “Really?”

“Yeah,” Vi chuckled, swaying forward. She kissed the damp hairs by her temple, gave a little cheeky smack on her butt. “Of course, go lay down. I got this.”

Caitlyn murmured something thankful into her neck, and Vi stole another forehead kiss before facing the disaster around her. 

She grabbed a towel to wipe up as Caitlyn left towards the couch, swaying a bit on wobbly knees, before finally slumping down into the cushions. Not seeming to notice the abandoned stack of case files on the coffee table, still blank-spaced and forgotten.

Whoops.

Maybe Vi should feel bad that she was wearing her out so much lately, but damn if the sight didn’t tug at her lips.

Caitlyn was passed out within seconds, face buried and hair scattered across the pillows. Vi didn’t know why her chest filled with so much pride, with such stupid, happy accomplishment. And the slightest bit of guilt.

But, oh well... 

Maybe Vi could just help around the house more to make up for it.