Chapter Text

Prologue

Her head pounded, her alarm rattled her brain, piercing her ears. This was the third time this week she had woken up like this—mouth dry, nauseous, light much too bright. But it was either deal with this in the morning or deal with the horrors at night. At least when she was drunk beyond recognition, she could fall asleep. A shallow, not-so-restful sleep, but at least it was uninterrupted, and she would be unconscious before she could even think. Before she could even remember.

Chapter Text

Monday, 07 April 2014

Second year. Haruka was now a second-year student. After the whirlwind that was her first year—heck, even the first week of her first year—Haruka could only hope for a slower, calmer year. And she could only expect another eventful, overwrought year.

Her core classes were the same: Social Studies, Science, Math, and Japanese Literature. But she also had new options for elective courses. This year, she chose Computer Science, English (which Akiyama-san could tutor her in, as he had to be fluent when he worked at Touto bank, though he never flaunted it), Advanced Music, and Environmental Science. It was the Environmental Science course she was most excited about. She had done plenty of independent study on her own, but learning about the environment and marine life in a classroom meant having a mentor to discuss with and peers to bounce off of. Independent study is useless without others to correct and guide you.

And, of course, Akiyama-sensei was her homeroom teacher, just as he had said. She still checked the giant board outside to make sure that she was indeed in his class—Class 2-B. How embarrassing it would be to show up at his class when she wasn't supposed to be there after all. They already decided to limit, if not completely stop, all unnecessary exchanges during the school day. Too many people talked a little too much, and too many people saw a little too much last year. Best not to have anything for people to see or hear in the first place.

But if he were her homeroom teacher, well, they'd have to see each other every day. Such a shame that he'd have to be her guide and mentor every day. Such a pity that she'd have to do everything he asked of her. Too bad they'd have to look at each other for the first several minutes of every morning.

Her friends teased her about having Akiyama-sensei for homeroom, even when she assured them time and again that she never spoke to him outside of the classroom. It’s not like he had any control over it anyway, she argued.

☆☆☆

Making sure he was Haruka-chan’s homeroom teacher was hardly a challenge for Akiyama. Part of it was luck. It just so happened that one of the second-year homeroom teachers retired at the end of last term. There was an open spot. 

Now, the odds were only 25% that she'd be in his class, and there was no way in hell he could just ask to be her homeroom teacher. Unless he did something to sway the odds. Like figuring out the password for admin access on the school's internal network and just… moving her name. And making sure that Usami kid wasn't in his class while he was at it. Hypothetically speaking.

He had to be sure to do it before the roster was announced to the teachers and hoped that whoever organized the classes didn't remember the details. It was probably all randomly determined, anyway. If he even were to change it, hypothetically.

When he received the roster, he triple-checked it once again to be sure he read it correctly. 

Yes.

There she was.

He folded the sheet of paper to put her name right under his.

Class 2-B: Akiyama Shun

- Sawamura Haruka

How perfect their names looked side by side.

He had to stop himself there; he couldn't let himself get so easily distracted by something so simple. Nor could he leave evidence like a creased piece of paper.

As the students filed into Classroom 2-B on the first day of school, he watched the door until she appeared.

“Good morning, Akiyama-sensei,” his angel finally said, only giving him the smallest of smiles.

“Good morning, Ha—Sawamura-san,” he stammered out.

All of the teachers were required to be on-site before the school year began to receive their rosters from Dojima-sensei and Kasuga-san. The staff gathered together in the faculty office, and everyone received the same copy of the school-wide roster. So everyone saw at the same time who was in Class 2-B. Including Majima-san. Out of paranoid habit, Akiyama glanced over at him, only to look him straight in the eye. Arms crossed, Majima-san approached and leaned against the wall beside him.

“Interestin’ roster ya got there, Aki-chan,” he said.

“Yeah, I'm glad I already know some of these students from teaching Home Ec; it'll make learning all their names a little easier.”

“Oh, sure, sure. There's at least one on here I know you'll have an easy time rememberin’.”

“There's a few, actually. What about you?”

“I teach first years, so these kids are all new to me. I also make it a habit of not getting too close to any of my students,” he said, lowering his voice for only Akiyama to hear. Akiyama clicked his tongue. 

“Well, I'm excited to see what this year will bring,” he ended with a smile.

“Hm,” Majima-san uttered and walked away without a second glance.

After greeting Akiyama, Haruka-chan searched for her assigned seat. Akiyama had learned from last year and didn't put her up at the front. Not only would she be much too distracting, but the optics of him doing so when there were more than a couple of people who thought they knew something had to be considered.

He still had her in direct line of sight. She was in the center column, the second row from the front. He may come to regret it, but he was happy for now. The bell rang. The first day of school began.

“Good morning, everyone. My name is Akiyama Shun, and I will be your homeroom teacher for this year. Let’s get introductions out of the way.”

☆☆☆

Mayflower’s blog:

Entry #1

i hav a secret tht i cant tell any1 so ill talk bout it here on my blog

im datin my teacher

wow (>⩊<) it feels so gud 2 finaly say it (๑>◡<๑) we new eachother b4 he became my teacher bt we didnt do anytin until after

''do anytin'' tht sounds so dirty (⁄ ⁄>⁄ ▽ ⁄<⁄ ⁄) we didnt evn kiss 4 long time n started holdin hands evn later

obvs we dont do anytin @ sckewl... unless teh classroom door is locked (´つヮ⊂)

anywayyyyyy lik i sed 4 obv resons i cant tlk abt anytin we do or say wit ANYONE so ill b sharin here

c u all soon (⁠✿⁠^⁠‿⁠^⁠)

And, post.

Haruka took a deep breath. She had thought about doing something like this for weeks, but actually going through with it? It’s terrifying to put something out there! But now that she had a second, secret phone—one that Akiyama-san bought for her that’s on his plan—she could just post from that instead of on her primary phone. She only ever had that phone out when she was completely alone, except for when she was around Akiyama-san, of course.

And now she had finally done it. She started a blog, made it all pretty, chose her pseudonym, and made her very first blog post!

She immediately regretted it. What if someone found it and knew it was her? What if they traced her IP address or used forensics to link the writing style to her? What if Ojisan or Majima-san found out? Or even Akiyama-san?

Or, even worse, what if someone read the darn thing!?

She had to delete it, fix it, destroy it, something! Maybe it wasn’t too late, maybe no one saw it yet. She only posted it about 45 seconds ago! She opened the page back up, logged back in, and deleted the entire thing.

She immediately regretted it. She put so much time and effort into making all of it just right, and she let a little cowardice get in her way? She remade everything, tweaked things here and there, and reposted her blog entry.

She didn’t regret it this time. But, man, it was still so nerve-wracking! But now it’s out there, and she planned on keeping it out there. She wanted to add more to it, divulge all the things they’d done, all the places they’d gone. But the more details she put out there, the easier it would be to trace back to her and Akiyama-san. No, she had to post sparingly and with as few details as possible. And leave her audience wanting more so they’d come back later!

She got up from her futon and tried walking throughout her tiny apartment to quell some of the nervous energy that wouldn’t go away.

“Can’t sleep?” Ojisan asked. He was staying up watching some old kung fu movie with subtitles that only kinda made sense.

“Yeah, first day of school jitters, you know?”

“Sure. Anything I can do?”

“Nah, I’ll just take a walk,” Haruka said and stepped over to the front door. As she shrugged on a light coat and slipped her shoes on, Ojisan told her to text him when she was on her way back. “Will do!” she called back and shut the door behind her.

It was springtime, and the evenings still had a bit of a chill in the air. She pulled out her secret phone and called the single contact on it.

“Hi, angel, how are you?” That nickname was so adorable, cheesy as it was. It made her smile every time he called her that.

“I’m ok, just having a hard time sleeping.”

“Oh, yeah? Need me to read you a bedtime story?”

She giggled. “No, that’s ok. I’m just taking a walk, maybe I’ll tire myself out.”

“I see. Well… I’m not busy, can I meet you, and we can walk together?”

“Are you sure? It’s already a little late—”

“All the better. Need to make sure my girlfriend gets home safe after being out at night, right?”

Girlfriend. It still made her so giddy whenever he called her that. It was so cute coming from him with his suave, almost conceited voice. Though if anyone deserved to be conceited, it was him.

“Where are you?” he asked.

She gave him directions, and a few minutes later, his car pulled up beside her. He parked on the side of the road, stepped out, walked right up to her, and planted his lips on hers before she had a chance to speak, grasping her face in his hands.

“Hi,” she said after their lips finally parted.

“Hi,” he responded, resting his forehead against hers.

“It might not be a good thing that you’re my homeroom teacher, Sensei.”

“Oh? And why’s that?”

“Because I have to look at you every morning and watch you leave the room without saying anything.”

“You’re so cute. You think it was easy for me to leave without saying anything, either?”

“Guess we’ll have to get used to it,” she said with a laugh. “I guess I don’t mind that, though.”

He answered her with another kiss, then took her hand. They walked hand-in-hand, chatting about their day and their hopes for the upcoming school year.

Tuesday, 08 April 2014

It was only the second day of the school year, and it was already getting difficult seeing each other without interacting at all. Of course, they knew how lucky they were to be able to see each other every day and weren't ungrateful for the opportunity. But separating without saying goodbye hurt more than they expected.

Haruka shared homeroom with only Akari-chan this year, but their two other friends, Azusa-chan and Mai-chan, walked straight to Class 2-B to share lunch with them without preamble. It was a nice day, and they decided to eat outside. As they all walked to the courtyard, Haruka covertly texted Akiyama-sensei on her second phone. As she hoped, he walked out into the courtyard and sat down on a bench across the way from where she and her friends were sitting, lunch in hand. It was almost like they were eating lunch together!

She had to make sure she didn't just stare at him the entire time and engage in conversation with her friends. But whenever she glanced over, he was staring at her intensely, not looking away for even a moment. 

Me: dont u think ur being a lil obvious

💖: I know when to look away, don't worry.

💖: Besides, I could easily be staring at the tree you're sitting under instead.

💖: No one should be suspicious just because of this.

Haruka managed to sneak her secret phone while her friends were chatting by keeping it inside her schoolbag whenever she held it. Her hands shook the whole time, which made her even more scared she’d be caught as she struggled to type out her messages.

“Yo, Akiyama-san, how goes it!” Haruka suddenly heard. She looked up and saw Kasuga-sensei doing his usual rounds. Already, she was panicking that they got caught. It was going to be a long time before she forgot about the little meeting she had with him and Daigo-nii-san about ‘someone’ being suspicious about her staying behind in Akiyama-sensei's class the previous school year.

“Oh, I'm doing well, Kasuga-san,” he responded, sitting back and shifting his body to face Kasuga-sensei more directly. “And you?”

“Oh, fine, fine. New year, new challenges, you know?”

“I hear that.”

“How's being a homeroom teacher treating you? Think you can handle it?”

“Well, it's not so difficult yet, but I won't hold my breath.”

“You'll do fine. How's your new lady? You were calling her every day last term.”

Haruka turned red. Hearing Kasuga-sensei refer to her as ‘his lady’, even if he didn't know he was talking about her, was both embarrassing and exhilarating.

Akiyama-sensei relaxed against the bench back. “She's great. She just started… a new job, but she's adjusting well, I think. We took a walk together last night and talked about it for, like, an hour.”

“That's nice. I’m happy for you. Last year was rough.”

“Yeah, well, things are better for me now than they’ve been in probably years, so I’m doing pretty alright,” he said with a soft smile.

“Good. Well, I gotta talk to the rest of the school, catch you later,” Kasuga-sensei said with a wave before approaching Haruka and her friends. “Hi, girls, eating outside? Perfect weather for it.”

Haruka heard her phone buzz while she and her friends greeted him and checked it from inside her bag after he moved on to another group of students.

💖: See? He doesn't suspect a thing, we're fine.

💖: You seemed to like hearing us talk about you (･ω<)☆

She looked back up at him, and he briefly glanced around before giving her another grin and a wink.

“What do you think, Haruka-chan?” she suddenly heard Akari-chan ask.

“Oh, uh, what? Sorry, I—”

“Don't play dumb, you're obviously ogling Akiyama-sensei,” Azusa-chan said.

“What? Me? No way!”

“Oh my god, Haruka-chan, stop lying to us. We know you still like him,” Mai-chan said.

Haruka sighed. “Fine, I guess I’m still not over him. But he's got a girlfriend or something now, Kasuga-sensei just asked him about her,” she said, acting defeated.

“Aw, Haruka-chan, I'm so sorry,” Akari-chan said.

“Yeah, well, I'm kinda glad, makes it easier for me to move on, you know? He's obviously over me. Not like there was much there on his end anyway.”

Akari-chan shifted over and gave her a hug, and Haruka rested her head on hers. “Stupid boys, stupid men,” she said with a huff.

“Just go for girls instead,” Azusa-chan said. Mai-chan gave her an indiscernible look.

“Ugh, that'd be so much easier, I wish I liked girls sometimes,” Akari-chan lamented.

“You never know until you try.”

“I wouldn't even know where to start.” The girls moved on in conversation, but Haruka still had a hard time not looking at the man who was sitting across the courtyard and still watching her.

Chapter Text

Every year, from the end of April to the start of May, schools and offices are closed for Golden Week—a week of holidays that are all within a few days of each other, and the longest break most Japanese citizens have for the year. Haruka hadn’t done anything special last year—she spent most of it trying to catch up on sleep that she was losing thanks to her nightmares. But this year was different. This year, her nightmares were only happening once, maybe twice a week. And also, this year, she had friends. Friends, and a man. A man who would spend every second of it with her if he could.

They wouldn’t be able to do any of the usual activities—everyone they knew would also be on break, out and about enjoying the rare time off from work and school. Very high risk of someone seeing them. And Haruka still wanted to do things with her friends and Ojisan, anyway. She wished for a world where Akiyama-san could tag along with her wherever she went, but the world refused to listen.

The two had gone cherry blossom viewing the day before school started at Shinjuku Gyoen National Park—the same park they shared their first kiss at, though it wasn’t Haruka’s fondest memory. It was still risky, and the two arrived with separate blankets and picnic baskets so they could claim they happened to run into each other. Still, sitting together out in the open in broad daylight felt so scandalous, and Haruka kept an eye on every single person who walked past.

“You know, you’re only making us look more suspicious if you act like that,” Akiyama-san had told her, lying on his back and enjoying the sunshine.

“I guess so,” she had responded. She tried her best to relax, but she had no idea how Akiyama-san was able to be so blasé about it. Maybe it just comes with age. The cherry blossoms really were beautiful—they were at peak bloom, the entire sky and ground dappled with soft pink flecks traveling along with the wind. It almost felt like one of those shoujo romance mangas she read from time to time. The trees had all turned to bright green by now, but there were plenty of other sights to behold.

And now was a perfect opportunity for her and Akiyama-san to do something together. They just had to get out of Kamurocho, out of Tokyo, to do it. He told her to tell Ojisan that she would be out all day with her friends on that Thursday, but nothing more.

Monday, 28 April 2014

The day before the holiday started, Haruka opened her shoe locker to an envelope. After running to the bathroom to open it in privacy, she saw that inside were two tickets—a round-trip on a bullet train to Osaka, and an entrance ticket for the Nemophila Festival at Osaka Maishima Seaside Park—and a note.

My angel,

On Thursday we’re going to Osaka for the Nemophila Festival. I know you have plans to see other flower festivals with your friends already, but these ones are so gorgeous, and it’s also on the ocean! I know you were nervous about being seen when we went cherry blossom viewing, and I wanted you to be able to do something like that with me while still feeling comfortable. No one in Osaka should know us. Maybe we can even hold hands while we’re there ;) Hopefully, since it’ll be Thursday and not an official holiday it won’t be too busy either. We can even wander around Sotenbori afterward. I hear they have one of your beloved Sega arcades there! The train ride is about 3 hours total with the station changes, so be prepared for that. You can always just fall asleep on my shoulder though ^_^

If you read this note before class, you better not be late! Every morning is brighter when you walk through my classroom door.

Until then,

-A

Once again, Akiyama-san took the time to add the furigana to all of the kanji on the note, even ones that anyone after first grade should know. She had been slowly getting better, but she was still behind most of her peers. These small kindnesses of his were part of why she… liked him so much. Yeah. 

Thursday, 01 May 2014

The train ride itself wasn’t too much of a struggle. Sure, they had to get to the Tokyo Station a bit before 6 am and had to hop around to other train stations after sitting on the train for almost 2 and a half hours, and then hop around on buses, but they still made it to the festival when it opened.

And what a sight it was.

It was hard to tell where the flowers ended and the ocean began. It was a perfect sea of blue as far as Haruka could see. Akiyama-san made sure to have a smoke before entering, he was already itching for one after not being able to on the trains and buses. But he was certain once the day began, he would be so distracted by Haruka that he wouldn’t even notice.

The two wandered the fields, taking in the sights, talking when they wanted to, and not feeling awkward when they didn’t. A few minutes in, Akiyama-san looked around and grabbed Haruka’s hand. She stared at their conjoined hands and then back up at him.

“No one’s here right now. It’s ok,” he assured her and leaned in to give her a kiss on the forehead. “Cutie, you’re already blushing so much.” Haruka shot her free hand to her face to cover it, but he grabbed it, pulled it away from her face, and then firmly planted a kiss on her lips. “I may as well give you something to blush about.” She only felt her cheeks get hotter, and he chuckled. “Don’t move,” he said and pulled out his phone before expertly taking a photo of her before she even realized it.

“Hey, I wasn’t ready!”

“Sorry, I had to. Now I can see that adorable blushing face of yours forever.”

Forever.

Whenever he used words like that, she didn’t know what to think. How serious was he about that kind of thing? Was it just his way of talking? Did he genuinely mean something like that? She couldn’t bear to ask and risk pushing him away if he took this relationship less seriously than her.

“Are you ready now?” he asked, pulling her out of her thought spiral.

“Oh, uh, yeah!” she said, and he pulled her in by the shoulder and took a selfie of the two of them, expanse of blue sky, blue flowers, and blue ocean stretching out behind them. Stretching out forever. “Can you send that to me?” she asked as she felt her secret phone buzz.

“I suppose I could,” he said, watching her take out her phone and seeing it was already in her inbox. She smiled and looked up at him. She started to say something but stopped. “What is it?”

“Thank you.”

☆☆☆

They spent another hour or so at the park before heading out to Sotenbori. They took a taxi, and for the briefest moment Haruka thought Ojisan was the driver, but it was just a stranger. She sighed with relief—she just couldn’t let the paranoia of being seen with Akiyama-san go. He asked her if she was ok, and she shrugged it off.

They wandered the city, dawdling on Iwao Bridge and staring out into the water. As they reached Sotenbori Street, Haruka saw a familiar sight. Akiyama-san was right—there was a Sega arcade there!

“Please, please, please, please, can we, can we, can we, can we?” she begged, almost jumping in anticipation. He laughed, delighted by her energy.

“I don’t know, have you been a good girl? Doing all of your chores and homework?” She vigorously nodded her head, ponytail bobbing, face filled with determination. “Oh, alright, I suppose so.”

“Yes!” she shouted, causing passers-by to look their way for a brief moment.

The arcade had pretty much everything that the arcade in Kamurocho had, but that didn’t disappoint her in the slightest. An arcade was an arcade, and that’s what mattered most. Akiyama-san even went so far as to humor her into one of their betting games. Haruka decided to play fair and picked a new game that she hadn’t played before, Gunrhein. After the first two attempts, she got the hang of it and managed to squeeze almost ¥20,000 out of him.

“How do you do it?” he asked her after she inspected her newly acquired wad of cash.

“I mean, it’s close enough to Boxcelios—”

“To what now?”

“That game over there,” she said, cocking her head in its direction as she continued to count her cash, “and I figured out the optimal spots to put the canons where they would lose the least amount of energy as they shot and—”

“Damn, you really impress me.”

“Sorry, I talked too much—”

“No, not at all! I’m just amazed by you.” She blushed and put her cash in her coin purse, clasp barely clicking shut. “Want to go to the photo booth?”

☆☆☆

After a few rounds of photos, Haruka picked the best ones to print and made sure they both had a copy of each of them. He still had the one they took together at the photo booth in Kamurocho months ago in his wallet.

“This can be retired to the album,” he said, taking it out and replacing it with the ones they just printed, placing the old photo in his pocket. “How about some food, I’m starving. I hear crab is pretty popular down here, wanna get some?” They found a place almost immediately—it’s hard to miss the giant crab above the entranceway. “Kani Douraku. Looks good, yeah?”

Haruka would not have agreed if she knew how expensive it was going to be. Was crab really this pricey? She did always buy imitation crab, instead, but she didn’t think the price difference was that vast.

“Hey, hey, hey, eyes up here, young lady,” she heard Akiyama-san say while snapping his fingers. “Want me to ask for a menu that doesn’t list the prices?”

“They probably don’t have one—”

“They almost definitely don’t, but pretend they do, ok? And you better not ask for the cheapest thing on the menu, either, alright? Pick something you actually want to eat.” He was right, she was eyeing that crab sushi platter, by far the cheapest. It was almost half the price of the second cheapest item! She glanced up at him one more time, and he was staring her down intensely. She relented and picked the shabushabu style crab, while he got one of those multi-course meals that he most certainly wouldn’t be able to finish on his own. At least he was willing to share it all with her.

“That was so good,” she said after they left. “Thank you for treating me.” He stepped right up to her and pulled her in for a hug.

“I appreciate the gratitude, but when will you get over this idea that I’m doing you a favor or expect something in return? It’s something I want to do, ok?” She tried to pull away.

“Akiyama-san—” He leaned his head lower to speak softly into her ear.

“Let me hug my girlfriend, ok? We don’t look that weird together. If nothing else I can just say you're my kid, or whatever, right?” She blushed thinking about when they went to the photo booth in Kamurocho, and the older woman thought they looked like a parent and child. Did they really look that different in age? Then she also remembered joking about calling him daddy and blushed even more. He kissed the top of her head and let her go. “What next?”

They briefly stopped at Revenge Books, but nothing else really interested Haruka. It seemed like half the businesses in the city were cabarets, or hostess or host clubs, and she was too young to go in any of them even if she wanted to. Akiyama-san already owned one, she could just go there if she were that curious.

They stopped at a convenience store for water and snacks for the train ride back, and Akiyama-san bought some cheap beer while there.

“Want one?”

“I've never tried beer.”

“You can have a sip of mine and see how you like it.” He opened one, the satisfying click of the tab leading to foam bubbling out of the top. He quickly drank the spillage before handing the can to her. She took it and sniffed it before having a small sip. Her face scrunched up.

“Ew, adults like this stuff?” He laughed and took the can back from her.

“I take it you don't,” he said before taking a proper swig from it.

“Uh-uh, it's all yours.” He suddenly gave her a kiss and her face scrunched again.

“I'll be tasting of beer for a while, does that bother you?” His mouth definitely had a beery taste, and she smacked her lips.

“I guess I can deal with it.” He laughed again before wrapping his arm around her neck and giving her a stronger kiss.

“Mmmmwah, are you sure?”

“Y-yeah, I'm sure,” she said, wiping her mouth. He chuckled again.

“We should get going, the train ride won't be any shorter on the way back. Unless there's anything else you want to do?”

“No, I'm exhausted.”

“Ok, let's go,” he said, taking her hand. She let it happen without hesitation this time, and the two walked all the way to the station without letting go.

☆☆☆

The train ride on the way back did end up being shorter. She fell asleep partway through and didn't wake for over an hour. When she awoke, she was resting her head on him, his arm wrapped around her shoulders.

“Good morning, sleepyhead,” he said, watching her rub her eyes and figure out where she was.

“What time is it?” He looked at his watch.

“Almost 5 pm. We still have an hour, want to nap some more?”

“No, I won't be able to sleep tonight if I do.”

“Ok. Hey, lemme show you some more photos I took today.” He pulled out his phone and she saw candid shot after candid shot of her. Walking through the flowers, wandering the city, staring out into the water on the bridge, focusing on the arcade game, staring at the menu at the crab place, reading the back of a book at the bookstore.

“You've been taking pictures of me all day!?”

“Of course. You don't look like this when you pose. I want to capture every little emotion you have, every kind of face you make. I've got a whole album of you on my phone.”

“What!?”

“Yeah, let me show you.” He exited out of the photo he was showing her and opened the “albums'' section. Sure enough, he had one labeled “My angel ❤️”, the preview being a collage of four more photos of her.

It was so sweet, almost saccharine, that he had this. Many of the photos were posed ones of her or both of them, but there were plenty of other candid shots that she never noticed he took.

“I lo— adore being able to look at you whenever I want. You have no idea the number of times one of my colleagues at the school almost caught me looking through it,” he said, scrolling through the pictures and gave her a peck on the cheek.

Then one picture she vaguely remembered was on screen. She was kneeling before him in her school uniform, her smiling face covered in cum, his still hard cock in the foreground. She looked like she was attempting a peace sign, but by that point she’d had a few Rum and Cokes while they were celebrating White Day. Haruka quickly looked behind and around her to make sure no one else could see it. Akiyama-san leaned in to speak into her ear.

“This one is especially risky to have, but no way am I getting rid of it. It's too hot,” he said, laying his phone face down on his lap, and gave her a kiss on her neck. “What time is Kiryu-san expecting you home?”

“I told him I wasn't sure when I'd get home, probably pretty late,” she said softly.

“Perfect,” he said, his hand caressing her thigh. “Look what you're already doing to me.” He grasped his hard cock over his pants, and Haruka started to feel a build-up of pleasure in her pants too. She quickly glanced around before wrapping her hand on his cock over his pants and leaned over to whisper to him.

“You're doing the same to me.” He took in a sharp breath.

“I wish this train could go faster.”

☆☆☆

The two couldn't even wait until they got to his apartment. As soon as they got in his car at the train station, they locked lips, hands wringing through hair and grasping at faces. His hand wandered up under the front of her shirt and squeezed her breast, and hers rubbed his cock over his pants. He forced them to separate.

“Let’s go,” he rasped out and started the car.

The drive was endless. The 15 minutes to get to his apartment felt longer than the 3-hour train ride to Osaka. Akiyama-san’s hand stayed firmly planted on her thigh, not willing to let it wander in any direction. After slamming his car doors a little too forcefully once he parked, they bounded up the steps to his apartment door, and in his haste, he struggled to unlock it. After finally opening the door, he lifted her by the waist before she even had the chance to shake her shoes off. She laughed, and he rested his other arm under her ass to balance her as he shook off his own shoes before pulling her in for a desperate, hungry kiss.

“God, I’ve been wanting to do this all day,” he said into her neck. She moaned, and he nibbled her ear. He carried her to the living room and laid back on his couch, letting her rest on top of him, as he always did. She started unbuttoning his shirt and saw the necklace he was wearing—his gold pendant that also had the Sagittarius charm. She never saw him without it. And she had only ever taken off her charm bracelet to sleep or bathe. The same went for the garnet necklace he gave her on Christmas Eve, the night they officially became a couple. That was a bit over four months ago already.

She stared at it, and her face softened. Akiyama-san rubbed her arm tenderly.

“Hey,” he said softly. She met his eyes, and he looked at her in a kind way she had never seen before. “Today was a lot of fun. I lo— had a great time.” She leaned down and gave him a gentle kiss on the lips. She looked at his eyes again, eyes that she could stare into for the rest of time. Her phone started to ring. She reached for it and looked at the screen.

“It’s Ojisan,” she said, getting off of Akiyama-san to stand. “Hi, Ojisan… Yeah, we had a great time… I’ll be home soon… I know… ok, I understand… ok… bye, love you.” She hung up and turned to look at Akiyama-san, who was now sitting up. “I gotta go. Ojisan wants me up early tomorrow for our hike at Mitakesan.” She walked back over to him and rested her hand on his cheek. “Sorry.”

“You don’t need to apologize, angel. I understand,” he said, taking her hand from his cheek and kissing it on the palm. “We'll have plenty of more opportunities.” He stood up, suddenly towering over her. He kissed her on the forehead. “Let’s get you home.”

When he parked his car around the corner from her apartment, the sun had completely set, the sky dappled with the occasional star that managed to pierce through the light pollution of Tokyo. They both stepped out, and he pushed her to the fence that was blocking the view from the apartment building, giving her a firm kiss.

“I’ll miss you,” he said. She smiled.

“I’ll miss you too,” she said and gave him a kiss in return. He rested his forehead on hers and placed his hand on her face, rubbing her cheek with her thumb.

“‘Parting is such sweet sorrow.’ Shakespeare was a genius when he came up with that.”

“He really was.”

“Ok, I won’t keep you any longer, even though I wish I could,” he said, removing his forehead from hers and standing up straight. She lifted herself up by her toes and gave him one final kiss.

“Bye,” she said. She started to continue but stopped.

“Hm?”

“I had a lot of fun today. Thank you.”

“Thank you. Now stop dawdling, I don’t want Kiryu-san to get worried about you.”

“Ok,” she said and gave him one more kiss before quickly turning the corner.

☆☆☆

Mayflower’s blog:

Entry #6

Omgggggg u guyz 2day A & i took teh bullet train out of town (*≧ω≦*)

its sooooo much easier 2 hold hands & kiss wen evry1 round u is a stranger

it was so much fun. we saw flower fields wen to teh arcade & ate sum yummy crab ≧( ° ° )≦

we got a lil frisky on the train ride back (*/▽＼*) we cud barly kep our hands off eachother once we got 2 his place!!

2 bad my dad called me b4 we cud get 2 teh rly gud stuff :(

ugh i alredy cant wait 2 c him agen i miss him soooo much

but i get 2 c him evry mornin durin skool so its not so bad

c u soon!

Chapter Text

The weather was uncharacteristically warm for spring, and school uniforms were quickly shifting from dark blazers to white cotton shirts with sailor ribbons, from long woolen socks and stockings to ankle socks and sheer tights. Akiyama couldn’t be more pleased to see Haruka-chan dressed so adorably every morning. They both still did their best to act as if they were any other student or teacher, but they knew what they had was so much more, and that was enough.

And every day, Akiyama only thought more and more about her. About Haruka-chan. Her beautiful brown eyes, her swaying ponytail, her bright smile, her contagious laugh, her tenacity, her determination, her wit. It was getting worse and worse. When she said she was feeling overwhelmed in a good way while they were sharing breakfast in his apartment the day after White Day, he knew what she meant, even if she didn't know it herself.

He was gone. Off the deep end. He couldn’t turn back, not now. And he hoped she felt the same way. So then why did saying it feel so scary? That little four-letter word. One syllable. He had said that word thousands of times to Hana. Saying it to her was as easy as breathing. So what was with his trepidation now?

Because he knew what it was. She didn't. And he didn't want to scare her, push her away, come on too strong. Sure, she liked him much longer, but he believed his feelings for her were much deeper than hers for him. She was only 17. Were 17-year-olds even capable of feeling that? Truly feeling it, and not just regular teenage hormones that they interpreted to be that feeling?

When she said it to him after he tucked her in his bed at the end of White Day, his thoughts were racing, but his mind went blank at the same time. She couldn't have meant it, right? She must've said it out of habit, she probably said it to Kiryu-san every night.

To hear her tell me that every night…

But how much longer could he wait? Of course, just being around her and being able to see her almost every day was a wonderful thing. But saying those three little words was almost like a verbal pact, an open proof of their bond.

Every time he looked at her, every time she smiled at him, every time he held her hand, every time her cute little ponytail swayed with her, every time he put his hand on her cheek, it only reinforced his feelings for her. He felt like he was going to explode if he didn’t get to say it, and soon.

But he couldn’t just blurt it out, right? He didn’t want to shock her by saying something like that, she had to be prepared. She was usually the one to say something first, but he had a hunch that there was something about saying that phrase that was more intimidating. She could easily be doubting his feelings for her as he sometimes did about hers. And he was the more emotional one, she was always so much more rational. She could be rationalizing her feelings away! 

No, it had to happen. And he had to take the lead.

Wednesday, 07 May 2014

It was the first day back to school from Golden Week and Haruka was running late. Somehow she kept running into issues getting to school—the train took longer than usual, causing her to wait at the crosswalk longer, someone asked her for directions to a specific convenience store and it took several minutes to figure out which one they were even asking about, and then there was an injured baby bird on the sidewalk that she had to climb a tree to put back in its nest. She would honestly be laughing at her predicament if she weren’t so anxious to be on time.

The bell was about to ring by the time she got to her shoe locker, and there was a note in it from Akiyama-sensei. It was going to have to wait until later, she didn't have the time to stop at the bathroom to read it. It was probably just another note about how he had fun with her in Sotenbori and couldn’t wait to see her in class anyway.

She saw the inside of the room for Class 2-B through the large hall windows as she ran up the stairs. Akiyama-sensei was looking at his watch and back up at her, eyebrows raised. She was barely a foot away from the door when the bell rang. For the first time since starting high school, she was officially late.

“Sawamura-san,” Akiyama-sensei said. “Care to explain why you’re late?” She sighed.

“You wouldn’t believe me even if I tried.” He crossed his arms.

“Is that so? Well, this is a first offense, but it still can’t go unpunished. Stand in the hall. Natsukawa-san, please get the water buckets from the cleaning closet and give them to her.” Akari-chan stood and headed toward the small metal closet in the back corner of the classroom, and Haruka took her place in the hallway. While she was waiting for the water buckets, her secret phone buzzed.

💖: Do I need to punish you some more later for being a bad little girl?

Haruka blushed intensely and peeked into the classroom. She locked eyes with Akiyama-sensei, who had his back to the classroom with his phone in his hand and stared at her intently before giving her the briefest of winks. She turned back into the hallway, and Akari-chan brought her the water buckets.

“Sorry, Haruka-chan. Everything ok?”

“Yeah, it really was just a trial of inconveniences to get here today.” She grabbed the water buckets from Akari-chan, and her arms felt like they were about to dislocate from the weight, they were so full. Akari-chan must be so strong from dance club! No way was she going to get that kind of strength from the singing club she was in that Park-sensei ran.

Her phone buzzed again, then she heard Akiyama-sensei ask the students about their holiday before one of her female classmates asked him what he was up to. 

“Oh, I went down to Osaka with my girlfriend to a flower festival, and we spent some time in Sotenbori after. It’s such a nice little city, we had a great time.”

“Girlfriend!?” some of her classmates responded. She couldn’t help but smile hearing him talk about her, what they did together, how much he enjoyed it. And none of them knew he was openly talking about her.

She glanced around before putting one of the buckets on the floor to read the text.

💖: In all seriousness, is everything ok? Run into trouble coming to school?

💖: Or does it have to do with my note? I’m sorry if I came on too strong or scared you or something.

His note? What could he have possibly written? She heard footsteps down the hall and quickly put her phone away to pick the bucket back up again. She’d have to respond later and read his note the first chance she got.

☆☆☆

When first period finally started, after Kashiwagi-sensei entered the classroom to start his lesson, Akiyama-sensei stepped out and faced Haruka.

“You can go back in the classroom now,” he said before giving the top of her head a light bap with his notebook. He stared at her, his notebook still on her head, his eyes darting all over her face.

“What?” she asked quietly. “Everyone can see us through the window, you know.” The top half of almost the entire wall facing the hallway was glass, common in many Japanese classrooms. He didn’t seem to care.

“Did you read it?”

“Your note? Not yet.”

“Be sure you do.”

“Ok. Can you help me with these buckets? My arms are really tired.”

“I suppose I could,” he said, tucking his notebook under his arm and reaching for one. As Haruka started to lift the bucket to pass it to him, some soapy water splashed out onto the floor and on their shoes. 

“Oh my gosh, I’m sorry!” she said as she attempted to adjust herself, which only caused more water to spill out of the one bucket. Her stumbling and the sudden change in balance made the other bucket splash soapy water onto the floor too. She groaned in exasperation.

“Hey, hey, it’s ok, it’s ok, yeah?” he said, putting out his arm to steady her. She stopped, took a deep breath, and tried again to lift the bucket. He took it from her hand. “Damn, this is heavy. Sorry, I wouldn’t have made you hold these if I knew.” She shrugged.

“Oh well, too late now.” She took one step, and her foot slipped out from under her on the now-drenched, lathered floor. She fell backwards, dropping the buckets, and kicking Akiyama-sensei out from under him. He landed in one of the worst ways possible.

Both were almost soaked through with water from the flying buckets. She was on her back, coughing, and almost all of his weight had landed on her. His forearm was supporting him up right next to her head, his other hand on the floor by her other ear. One of his legs was between hers, thigh resting directly at her core, the other leg to the side of her, knee having dragged her skirt up during the fall. He stayed in place on top of her, steadying his breath and trying to comprehend why he wasn’t standing anymore. Kashiwagi-sensei stepped out of the classroom, alarmed by the sound of water splashing and people falling. Some students stepped out with him, curious about the chaos, a few having even watched the whole event unfold from their desks.

“Haruka-chan, are you ok?” Akiyama-sensei asked right by her ear, not bothering to remember to use her family name when interacting at school. Her eyes were staring at the fluorescent light on the ceiling of Kamurocho High, but she was looking right at the wooden ceiling of Morning Glory, bathed in golden light.

I’m stuck. I can’t move. i’m powerless he's here he’s back im suffocating im on that piece of floorboard again its going to happen again i cant stop him

He finally lifted his torso off of her but still hovered over her. Haruka’s view changed with him. To a view she hadn’t seen in years. To something that Akiyama-san had never once done to her. To a man over her, completely on top of her, pinning her to the floor. Her lungs stopped working.

Itsgoingtohappenagain icantstophim imtoosmall imtooweak

imgoingtodie

             imgoingtodie

                        i m g o i n g t o d i e

                                                         i   m   g   o

                                                                                 i    n      g         t       o   

                                                                                                                             d      i     

                                                                                                                                         e

Sunsets in Okinawa were always so beautiful. Except for that one.

☆☆☆

“Haruka-chan, are you ok?” Akiyama had asked by her ear, forgetting to call her Sawamura-san in front of others. He pushed himself up to get a better look at her. “Hey, hey, Haruka-chan, can you hear me?” He moved his hand to her face, trying to bring her back. Her eyes were unfocused, her breaths were getting faster and faster, a tear rolled down her face. He heard Kashiwagi-san say something, the chatter of some of the students standing nearby, the sound of chairs and desks moving across the floor as others got up to see.

Great, now a bunch of her classmates are going to see her like this. See us like this. Shit.

“Let’s get you to Nurse Nanba, ok?” he said, placing a hand on her arm. She screamed and hurriedly scooted back, away from him and against the wall. Her breathing wouldn’t slow down, and she continued to just stare into the middle distance. “Haruka-chan?” he said softly. Her friend Natsukawa-san approached and kneeled down next to her.

“Haruka-chan,” she said quietly by her ear, and she looked up at her.

“Akari-chan?”

“Let’s go to the nurse’s office, ok?” Natsukawa-san helped Haruka-chan stand, as Akiyama just watched the two get up and walk away. Still kneeling on the floor, he looked over at his audience.

“What happened, Akiyama-san?” Kashiwagi-san asked.

“I don’t even know.”

☆☆☆

Haruka-chan was a wreck the entire walk to the nurse’s office. Akari did her very best to keep her in the present, but Haruka-chan couldn’t slow her breathing, couldn’t stop crying. Haruka-chan kept her hand on her arm the entire time, at the spot where Akiyama-sensei only lightly brushed her.

“Nanba-sensei!” Akari called as she entered the nurse’s office with Haruka-chan.

“What is i— oh my god, Sawamura-san, what happened!?”

“She fell while holding a bucket of water,” was all Akari offered. She honestly wasn’t sure about the rest, but right now she just wanted Haruka-chan to lie down and relax.

“Ok, here’s an open cot,” Nanba-sensei said, opening the curtain of the nearest one. Akari thanked him, led Haruka-chan over to it, and let her lay down. “Want me to call your father, Sawamura-san?” Haruka-chan said nothing. “Sawamura-san?” She still said nothing. “I’m calling your father,” he said and picked up the office phone receiver. Akari was at a loss and stood by Haruka-chan, watching her and wondering what happened. This felt all too familiar—the first week of school last year, Haruka-chan was suddenly sick, and she watched over her until she fell asleep and Nanba-sensei told her to leave. Did something like that happen again?

She grabbed a folding chair and sat down next to Haruka-chan, absent-mindedly biting her nails as Nanba-sensei called Haruka-chan’s dad. A little while later, Akiyama-sensei suddenly appeared, face heavy with worry. He had removed his suit jacket—presumably to let it dry—and his pants were still a bit wet. His shirt was mostly dry, which was unfortunate as that meant it wasn't clinging to the physique that Haruka-chan gushed about a few times. The first couple of buttons were unbuttoned as always, but it was more noticeable now, as was his necklace that had a pendant and charm on it. His hair was out of place as if he had just haphazardly dried it with a towel and didn’t bother to fix it beyond a superficial brush through. He honestly looked pretty hot. It wasn’t hard to see what Haruka-chan saw in him.

“How is she?” he asked the room. Nanba-sensei gave a vague answer before informing him he had called her dad, and Akari met his gaze before simply shrugging. She noticed she was biting her nails and quickly moved her hand to her lap, covering it with her other hand. He walked tentatively over, not daring to get too close. “Haruka-chan?” Hearing him call her that was so cute. He must’ve always called her that. When she didn’t move, he stepped a little closer. He gingerly moved his hand toward her, but pulled it back at the last second. “Natsukawa-san, you should get back to class.” Akari put her took one last look at Haruka-chan, nodded, stood, and started to walk out, briefly stopping next to him.

“Take good care of her, sensei,” she said quietly so only he could hear. He turned his head to her, but she continued to walk back to class. Maybe he could help her better than she could.

☆☆☆

Akiyama continued to sit by her, but Haruka-chan didn’t turn over to face him once. Her breathing had slowed at some point, but that wasn’t enough for him. He tried to figure out what was going on. Was it just because she fell? Did the wind get knocked out of her? But when she screamed and moved away from him like that…

He continued to think. Did it have to do with some sort of anxiety thing? He did some cursory research a long time ago when she first told him about what she was dealing with, but it wasn’t at all helpful now. She said she hadn’t read his note yet, so it didn’t have anything to do with that. So what was it?

She was still wet from the water, but he didn’t dare find a towel or blanket to dry her with. Who knows how she’d react if he suddenly put his hands on her again.

“Haruka!” he suddenly heard and looked up to see Kiryu-san entering the nurse’s office. “Akiyama-san, what happened?”

“She fell while she was holding two buckets of water. She was late this morning, so I had to punish her somehow. I didn’t think it’d end like this…” He watched Kiryu-san approach her and put his hand on her arm. She flinched and curled deeper into herself.

“Haruka,” Kiryu-san said. She didn’t move. He walked to the other side of the cot to look at her face. He had a brief look of shock but didn’t say anything. “Haruka, can you stand?” She didn’t move. Kiryu-san attempted to pick her up, but she only struggled, and he let her go. “Nanba-san, what’s wrong with her?”

“How should I know? I’m not a doctor.” Kiryu-san scoffed and looked back at her before moving his gaze to Akiyama.

“Date-san is covering for me,” Akiyama said, staring at Haruka-chan. It was the first day after break, the students would rather have another day off anyway. He didn’t remove his gaze from Haruka-chan once.

“She’s gonna have to stand up at some point,” Nanba-san said.

“Yeah, I know,” Kiryu-san said, annoyed. Nanba-san put his hands up in an “I’m just saying” sort of gesture. “Sorry, Haruka,” Kiryu-san said and grabbed her, trying to force her to stand. She struggled and pushed, but he at least got her to sit up. Her back was facing Akiyama still. She wrapped her arms around herself, and her shoulders started to shake. Akiyama dared not say a word. Kiryu-san kneeled in front of her and forced her to look at him.

“Ojisan…” 

“Let’s get you home.” Akiyama watched Haruka-chan carefully stand, avoiding any touch from Kiryu-san as he tried to steady her.

“I’ll inform Kasuga-san and Dojima-sensei,” he offered.

“Thank you, Akiyama-san,” Kiryu-san responded as he exited the nurse’s office. Haruka-chan followed behind him, not even acknowledging that he was there. Akiyama still didn’t stand up from the folding chair, staring at the cot that she had been lying on.

“You plan on leaving at some point?” Nanba-san suddenly asked.

“Right, yeah, sorry.” He stood and slowly plodded his way up to the principal’s office.

Chapter Text

— 7 May, 6:00 —

😇🩷🌸Haruka-chan🌸🩷😇: gud morning (⁠✿⁠^⁠‿⁠^⁠)

Me: Good morning, my angel! Can't wait to see you ヽ(*⌒▽⌒*)ﾉ

😇🩷🌸Haruka-chan🌸🩷😇: me either ⸜( ´ ꒳ ` )⸝

— 13:21 —

Me: Haruka-chan, how are you feeling?

          Delivered

— 15:32 —

Me: Is everything ok?

          Delivered

— 18:40 —

Me: Is there anything I can do?

          Delivered

— 22:01 —

Me: Good night, Haruka-chan (´,,•ω•,,)♡ Sweet dreams.

          Delivered

Thursday, 08 May 2014

— 8 May, 6:02 —

Me: Good morning, my angel. I can’t wait to see that gorgeous face of yours in homeroom ( ´ ▽ ` ).｡ｏ♡

          Delivered

While it hurt Akiyama that Haruka-chan wasn’t reading any of his texts, he didn’t let it get to him too much. She was probably still suffering from whatever it was that had happened the day before, and she was the kind of girl who liked to be alone when she was upset. At least he’d see her at school.

But when he entered the classroom, some of the students who were already there started snickering. He looked at all of them, and they were all either staring at him or just behind him. His heart sank when he turned and looked at the chalkboard—someone had drawn a giant umbrella, with his and Haruka-chan’s names underneath.

He put a fist to his forehead and turned back around to face the students.

“Who did this?” he asked sternly. No one said anything, only continued to barely contain their smiles, many now not able to meet his gaze. He scoffed and picked up the chalkboard eraser. As he was about to put the eraser to the board, Haruka-chan walked in. “Sawamura-san,” he said by way of greeting. He stopped in place. She was exhausted, her eyes were dark and baggy, and she looked like she didn’t even have the time to properly get ready that morning. She looked at the chalkboard, and her eyes widened. “Shit,” he said and feverishly rubbed down the chalkboard to get rid of the graffiti, but it was too late. She saw it, half the class saw it, and someone had gone to the trouble of drawing it in the first place.

Was my falling on top of her really enough for this kind of reaction? Someone must’ve been suspicious before it happened.

When he turned back around, Haruka-chan was nowhere to be seen. He placed his palms on the teacher's desk and leaned forward, staring down the entire classroom.

“I’m going to ask one more time. Who’s responsible for this? It’s extremely inappropriate, and I can easily get it classified as bullying.” No one said anything. He sighed and pulled out his phone.

Me: Haruka-chan, are you ok? I’m sorry you saw that, I don’t know who put it up there.

Me: Did you not sleep well? You look really tired. We can take another nap in the trees for old time’s sake if you want.

         Delivered

☆☆☆

Akari had to sit in her classroom, staring at Haruka-chan’s empty desk, and listening to her classmates gossip. She didn’t see the umbrella in person, but a classmate, Amon-san, took a photo and showed it to her before she asked, “You’re her friend, right? Something going on between them, or something?” Akari scoffed.

“As if, you think that old man is even in her league? No way.”

“But didn’t she always stay behind in his classroom or something last year?” Hori-san asked.

“What’s that have to do with anything?”

“Who knows what they were up to when she stayed.”

“Probably talking about the lesson?”

“Oh, I’m sure she learned plenty of things from him,” another student chimed in. The students around them laughed and Akari could only roll her eyes.

“There’s nothing going on, alright? Jeez, do people really think that just because of what happened yesterday?”

“I mean, didn’t he call her by her given name? He used ‘-chan’ and everything,” Amon-san said.

“Yeah, and people only land on each other like that in anime. He probably was just looking for an excuse,” another student said.

“Did you see how she screamed!? Playing it up a bit much, don’t you think?” Hori-san added.

“He put her seat, like, right in front of him too, you know?” Amon-san continued.

No matter what Akari said, no one would listen. They made up their minds as soon as they saw that umbrella. Whoever put that up there was going to pay.

☆☆☆

Haruka hid in the bathroom and didn’t come out. She saw that Akiyama-san had been texting her but didn’t have the strength to even open the messages, let alone respond. She continued to have flashbacks and panic attacks for the rest of the afternoon the day before, and hardly slept that night either, constantly being awoken by her nightmares. They were more horrific and real than they had been in maybe a year, if ever. If only she weren’t late yesterday, none of this would’ve happened. She stayed in the bathroom stall for over an hour, putting her thoughts together. By then, it was too late to come back to class without looking suspicious. Instead, she went to Date-san’s office.

“Oh, Haruka-chan, how are you?” Date-san asked when she stepped into his office. He was somehow still the school counselor, but she rarely saw any students there.

“Not so great, Date-san.”

“What’s the matter?” Haruka did her best to explain everything that had happened in the past 24 hours or so, but she kept getting jumbled, jumping around in time, forgetting details then having to add them later. When she finished, Date-san just stared at her before saying, “I see.” He said nothing else.

“Really? That’s all you have to say?” she said flatly. “Aren’t you a counselor?”

“I’m not a therapist. How’s that going by the way?” Date-san was the one who even found Makimura-sensei to begin with, and Haruka was still grateful to him for doing that. She had another appointment that afternoon, in fact. She explained some of the progress she made and what she talked about in therapy, but still kept it vague. Date-san seemed satisfied, though. “How about you stay here until lunchtime? Think you can at least make it through your afternoon classes?”

“I think so,” she said. “Thank you, Date-san.”

☆☆☆

The reception Haruka received when she went back to class for lunch was not nearly as warm as she expected. It wasn’t even neutral. Akari-chan attempted to meet her at the classroom door before anyone saw her, but it was too late.

“Look who’s back, teacher’s little pet,” one of her classmates said.

“Where were you all morning? Going to town with Akiyama-sensei?” asked another. Some of the students whistled or laughed in response.

“Haruka-chan,” Akari-chan said after she reached her. “Let’s go eat lunch, ok?” She lifted her and Haruka’s bento that she had grabbed from her desk before taking her by the arm and leading her outside. Soon after, Mai-chan and Azusa-chan met up with them, and they sat outside under the shade of a tree to eat. The girls all tried to make light conversation to distract Haruka, but she couldn’t get out of her head, thoughts circling around what her classmates said to her and the umbrella on the chalkboard.

“Haruka-chan, I’m so sorry,” Akari-chan finally said.

“It’s not your fault.”

“But I didn’t do enough to stop it.”

“Not like you’d be able to do much in the first place.”

“Haruka-chan, look,” Mai-chan said, moving her head in a way to covertly point behind her. She turned and saw Akiyama-sensei standing there in the green field, arms crossed and staring at her.

“Sawamura-san, we’ve been summoned.”

“By who?”

“Kasuga-san and Dojima-sensei.” Her eyes widened and her heart sank. “Come on,” he said, cocking his head in the direction they had to walk.

“Leave your stuff here, Haruka-chan, I’ll take it back with me if you don’t make it back,” Akari-chan offered. Haruka thanked her and made her way over to Akiyama-sensei.

“Sorry I have to be the one to bring you over, it’ll just make more students see us together,” he said quietly as they walked.

“Nothing to be done about it.” They walked in silence the rest of the way, staying well over a foot apart from each other. Occasionally a student would look their way, many of whom had definitely caught wind of the rumors by then, based on their faces. When they reached Dojima-sensei’s office, Akiyama-sensei knocked three times on the door.

“Come in,” they heard him say. Akiyama-sensei opened the door, holding it so Haruka could walk in first. She quietly thanked him, and he shut the door behind them, following her to the chairs in front of Dojima-sensei, who was sitting at his desk, a severe look on his face. Kasuga-sensei was standing by him, a more relaxed but still serious look on his. Dojima-sensei leaned forward and brought his hands together. “I’m sure you’ve figured out why you’re here.”

“I can hazard a guess,” Akiyama-sensei said, sitting back and crossing his legs. Haruka stayed sitting up straight, hands on her knees, staring at the floor.

“Care to explain?” Kasuga-sensei asked.

“Pointless rumors.”

“Haruka-chan? What do you have to say?”

“Pointless rumors,” she managed to push out. Dojima-sensei cleared his throat.

“Unfortunately, we’ll need more than that from both of you. Especially since this isn’t the first time we’ve had to have this discussion,” he said. Haruka had a hard time forgetting when she was summoned to the same seat alone just a couple of months prior in February. She eventually told Akiyama-sensei about it, but he wasn’t concerned. He still didn’t seem to be.

“What, like a statement or something?” Akiyama-sensei asked.

“A written statement from each of you, explaining what your relationship is, why the rumors are false, and what you will do to remedy it.” Haruka felt herself turn red at the word ‘relationship’ but stayed absolutely still.

“If the rumors continue after a couple of weeks we may need you to make a public statement,” Kasuga-sensei added.

“Public?” Akiyama-sensei asked.

“We can’t have parents hearing these kinds of rumors, we don’t want to spoil our reputation,” Dojima-sensei said.

“What, a high school staffed with ex-yakuza isn’t enough to spoil the school’s reputation, but a baseless rumor like this is?”

“We dealt with that years ago. But this could make people talk about all of that again too.”

“This is ridiculous.” As the men talked, Haruka did her best to just stay in the present. This was all too much already, but making a public statement about all of this too? Her breath was starting to catch and a lump built in her throat. Her sight started to go black from staring at one spot on the floor for so long, her mind started to travel to the sky above. Someone suddenly touched her shoulder, and she flinched.

“Haruka-chan?” Akiyama-sensei said. His hand was hovering over where he had touched her, concern on his face. “See what you’re doing to her with all this talk?” he raised his voice at the two men in front of them. Kasuga-sensei sighed.

“Look, I don’t want you to have to do any of this either. If it were up to me I’d handle all of this myself and protect the two of you from any more embarrassment,” he said, eyes involuntarily flicking over to Dojima-sensei. “But doing nothing isn’t an option.” The men talked out some more details, Haruka hardly even listening. Suddenly she heard one of them say her name.

“You’re dismissed,” Dojima-sensei said. She nodded, stood up, and quickly walked to the door without taking her eyes off the floor. Akiyama-sensei followed behind her, long strides keeping up with her pace. After they stepped out and he shut the door behind them, he stopped her.

“Hey, are you ok?” he asked. She shook her head no. “I know, this is a lot. I’m sorry, it’s probably all my fault.”

“No, it’s ok,” she said weakly.

“Come here,” he said, pulling her in for a hug. She pushed him away, and hurt coated his face.

“We shouldn’t, not here,” she said, looking at the door to Dojima-sensei’s office that they were still directly in front of.

“I guess you’re right.” He sighed and stared at her. He looked like he wanted to ask her something but dismissed the thought. “Let’s go,” he said, looking at his watch. “The bell for next period is going to ring in just a couple minutes.” He walked off, leaving Haruka behind.

☆☆☆

Mayflower’s blog:

Entry #7

u guyzzzzzzz its code red up in here {{ (>_<) }}

sum1 started spredin rumrs bout me & A Σ(°△°|||)︴

& evry1 beleves them (╬ Ò﹏Ó)

ugh wre we dat obv???????

i thot we wre hidin it pretty well…

its so scary i evn had 2 tlk 2 teh prinsiple bout it!!

this sux

☆☆☆

Mayflower’s blog:

Entry #8

im not doing gr8 u guyz

i had nitemares evry nite 4 teh past 5 days

im gettin no sleep

my dad has 2 keep chekin on me

i cant beleve this is hapenin agen

it hapened 2 me in april last year & it took weeks 4 me 2 sleep 2 nites in a row

i was doin so gud

☆☆☆

Mayflower’s blog:

Entry #9

2 weeks

its been 2 weeks since ive slept thru the nite

im exhasted

i hate this

So I'm sure many of you have seen this image by now

You know what I had to do

Couldn't decide which one I liked most. I'm never 100% satisfied when I make something (I still go back to Mayflowers and edit chapters occasionally >.< nothing too plot relevant, but fixing sentences or changing word choice etc.), but I think I like the 2nd one most. Regardless, Yuta bad Akiyama good (o˘◡˘o)

Chapter Text

— 9 May, 6:01 —

Me: Good morning, Haruka-chan! Were you able to catch up on any sleep?

          Read

— 11:52 —

Me: Want to eat lunch "together" outside today?

          Read

— 21:58 —

Me: Good night, Haruka-chan. I hope you're able to get some sleep tonight.

          Read

☆☆☆

— 14 May, 14:28 —

Me: I overheard some of my other students talking about this new anime "Haikyuu"

Me: It's supposed to be really good, have you watched any of it?

— 18:03 —

😇🩷🌸Haruka-chan🌸🩷😇: no

☆☆☆

— 16 May, 17:35 —

↖ Unanswered call

☆☆☆

— 20 May, 5:25 —

😇🩷🌸Haruka-chan🌸🩷😇: gm

— 6:00 —

Me: Good morning! You're up early!

😇🩷🌸Haruka-chan🌸🩷😇: no

😇🩷🌸Haruka-chan🌸🩷😇: jst still awake from last nite

Thursday, 22 May 2014

“Haruka-chan, is everything ok? You look like you’ve hardly been sleeping,” Akari-chan said during lunch. They had stayed in the classroom, Haruka not having the energy to even stand up. 

“Because I haven’t been sleeping,” she replied, too tired to bother lying.

“Anything I can help with? I’ve got some melatonin at home you can try.”

“Psssh, that crap doesn’t help me at all. I still wake up, I still get nightmares.”

“Oh, sorry…”

“No, no, it’s ok. I just want to sleep…” Akari-chan nodded and rested her head on Haruka’s shoulder.

“Damn girl, you look like shit,” Azusa-chan said as she and Mai-chan entered the classroom. Mai-chan quickly turned and hit her arm with the back of her hand. “Ow! It’s true though!”

“That doesn’t mean you should say it!” Mai-chan responded, pulling up a chair.

☆☆☆

It was like a switch had been flipped in Haruka-chan. She was only looking worse, and she was hardly speaking to him, hardly looking at him, barely even responding to his texts.

It was the lack of texts that confused him the most. He perfectly understood her not wanting to talk to him at school at all after the whole umbrella-on-the-chalkboard incident. Her classmates still hadn't let it go, and he heard snide comments here and there, and even once saw someone throw a balled up piece of paper at her. Though, he was staring at her, so he had no idea who threw it. He really should do better about how much he focused on her.

But that didn’t mean she had to stop texting him too. Was it the note? He wanted to ask her about it after the meeting with Dojima-sensei and Kasuga-san but decided it wasn’t a good time. Did she even read it? Had she forgotten about it? Or was it because he was the one on top of her after they fell?

He had been so careful, making sure she knew she had the power and was in control, always making sure he was never the one on top. And yet, that wasn’t enough. He had promised to protect her, that it was never going to happen again as long as he was around, that he would keep her safe. And he let her down. 

He put his head in his hands and just breathed.

“Akiyama-san, something the matter?” He lifted his head to see who it was.

“Oh, Kasuga-san.” He sighed. “Yeah, things are a little rough right now.” Kasuga-san leaned down to speak closer to his ear.

“Is it because of the rumors? I'm sure it's already a lot to deal with, and I was hardly any help when we had that little conference,” he said quietly.

“No. Well, it's not helping me feel any better, but there's other stuff too.”

“Wanna take a walk?” It was lunchtime, and Akiyama wasn’t eating.

“Sure.”

As the two walked, Akiyama tried to explain that he was having issues with his girlfriend, that she was hardly reaching out to him or talking to him. He gave vague details about her suffering from some sort of mental thing that he still didn't really understand, without giving so much that Haruka-chan could cross his radar. After that little meeting with him and Dojima-sensei, Akiyama was even more careful about what he said about his girlfriend. Kasuga-san silently listened and only spoke when Akiyama was done.

“Have you been able to find time to talk to her in person?”

“Not really, I haven’t had a lot of opportunities. I haven’t spent any time with her after s—… work in, like, two weeks. And I don’t want to force her into a conversation, that might just make things worse.” Kasuga-san silently nodded. As they walked, they passed classroom 2-B, and Akiyama stole a glance through the window. He saw her, and she looked absolutely miserable. She was sitting with her friends, hardly even eating, not even engaging in conversation with them. Akiyama so desperately wanted to just run in and hold her, tell her everything was ok. But he couldn’t. He had to just silently watch her suffer.

“I just really miss her,” Akiyama said.

“I’m sorry I can’t be of much help.”

“No, no, it’s ok. I haven’t been able to talk about this with anyone, so this helped.”

“I’m glad. You don’t think she’s heard any of these rumors, do you? That probably wouldn’t make things any easier on her end.”

You're right, it's not.

“I don’t think so. This kind of thing doesn’t leave the school very often, you know?” Kasuga-san nodded again. “Though, I suppose there’s always a risk.”

“Well, you know where to find me if you ever want to talk.”

“Thanks, man, I always appreciate it.”

☆☆☆

“Haruka-chan, how are you?” Makimura-sensei asked. It was Haruka’s first appointment since the day of the umbrella on the chalkboard. Because of how well Haruka had been doing, she was only seeing her every other week.

“Awful.”

“What happened? Last time we talked about some bullying, did that continue?” Haruka had only brought up that her classmates had started picking on her, but she didn’t have the strength to talk about why. And she was still hiding Akiyama-san from her—there was no need to bring him up, he was always so good to her. And she didn’t want to risk another panic attack, either. Talking about what happened could’ve brought them on again.

“I just… I just want to sleep…”

“Have you not been sleeping well?”

“No! The nightmares are back, I’ve not slept in two weeks!” she yelled.

“Are they the same as before?”

“Yes, but they’re worse. They’re stronger, louder, I don’t know! I just want it to stop,” she said, voice cracking.

“Do you know what might have triggered them?” Haruka put her head in her hands and nodded. “What happened?” Haruka did her best to describe the incident—she was late, she had to hold buckets of soapy water, the water spilled, then a man was on top of her, and she panicked, lost control.

“I’m so weak,” she sobbed out. “If one little accident was enough to make all of this start over again—”

“Haruka-chan, you’re not weak,” Makimura-sensei said.

“But I am!”

“No, you’re not. Remember how hard you fought to make it through before? You can do it again. Recovery isn’t linear—”

“But it’s worse this time! And I don’t think I have the strength to do it all again…” Tears were properly flowing from her eyes now.

“Here, let me write you a referral for a psychiatrist.”

“A psychiatrist?”

“Someone who can prescribe you medication.”

“But I don’t want to take medication!”

“It might help, it helps a lot of people.” Makimura-sensei unlocked her computer and started typing.

But that’ll just mean I'm even weaker. I can’t get better unless I pop some pills? Oh my god, is it going to be expensive too? Therapy is already ¥4,000 a session, and now I have to pay for medicine? We can’t afford this…

“Ok, I’ve written up your referral, you should get a call in the next few days.”

“Days!? But I need help now!”

“I understand it’s very frustrating, but it’s part of the process, ok?” Haruka spent the next several minutes interrogating Makimura-sensei about what a psychiatrist was, why she needed one, and what they could even do. 

“It can take a few weeks to find the right medicine—”

“Weeks!? I have to wait days to even get a call, and now you tell me I need to wait weeks for anything to even maybe work!? What’s the fucking point!?” She surprised herself with her outburst, but it was exactly how she felt. Makimura-sensei just looked at her, waiting for her to continue. Haruka stood up and got ready to leave.

“Want to schedule an appointment for next week?” Makimura-sensei asked. Haruka didn’t respond as she stomped out of the office.

☆☆☆

Instead of going home, Haruka went to the heart of Kamurocho, looking for a distraction, to blow off some steam. She tried the batting center. Didn’t help. Karaoke. Didn’t help. Bowling. Didn’t help. She was running out of options and running out of daylight. Ojisan was probably waiting for her at home. He could keep waiting.

She was walking around the city when she found herself standing next to the towering makeshift walls of West Park. It was a haven for homeless people and was also the location of the underground pleasure area Purgatory, home of The Florist. She remembered having to stay there as a kid, waiting for Ojisan to come back from whatever he was doing. 

Majima-san had some lofty ideas about developing it into some sort of residential or commercial area called Kamurocho Hills to bring in money for the Tojo Clan, but The Great Dissolution rendered all of his ideas moot. And so, the homeless encampment stayed. She remembered this was where Akiyama-san spent a lot of time back when he was homeless, and he still had some homeless buddies that he’d drink with from time to time.

She entered through the secret door in the back stall of the men’s bathroom. As she walked through the park, whistles and whoops flew her way. She was still wearing her uniform and everything.

“Lost, little lady? Or are ya here for a good time?” she heard one of them ask.

“What’s a girl gotta do to get a drink around here?” she called back. There was a group of about half a dozen or so men sitting around a flaming barrel, various drinks in hand.

“Well, a cute little lady like you just has to ask for one,” another said.

“Well then, may I have one pretty please?” she asked, batting her eyelashes.

“Come on over!” One of the men opened one of those cheap sake cups, and she downed it in three gulps. The men around her cheered as she wiped her mouth with the back of her hand.

“Another!” she shouted, lifting the empty cup in the air.

“Yes ma’am!”

Throughout the evening, as she and the men chatted and joked around, Haruka downed sake cup after sake cup. She was losing her balance, her feeling in her cheeks, and her fear of reality.

“Next time, you’re buying!” one of the men said.

“Sure thing,” she said with a wink. Everyone cheered at that. Eventually, she checked her phone. It was somehow past 8 pm, and she had multiple missed calls from Ojisan. “Shit!”

“Wassa matter?” one of the men slurred out.

“Sorry boys, I gotta go home, catch ya later!”

“Alright little lady, looking forward to seeing you again!” She waved back with another wink. There was a final round of whoops, and she stumbled back through the secret entrance in the men’s room. She pulled her phone out again and called Ojisan. It barely finished the first ring.

“Haruka!? Are you ok!?”

“Yeah Ojisan, sorry. Time jusss’ got away from me—”

“Could you at least tell me next time!? I called Makimura-sensei’s office hours ago and they said you'd left early, and then you weren't answering your phone, and—” Haruka heard his voice catch through the receiver. He took a deep, shuddering breath. “Let me make some calls, I've had people out looking for you.”

“Looking for me?”

“I didn't know what else to do, Haruka! I thought— I thought something might've happened to you or someone took you. Nishiki and Majima-no-nii-san are combing the city for you, Date-san and Daigo are out in the neighborhoods looking for you—”

“Daigo-nii-san?” After the confrontation in the principal's office about her relationship with Akiyama-san, she had avoided him completely. It was too embarrassing to even look at him after that.

Akiyama-san. She'd hardly talked to him. How foolish they were to think they'd be able to get away with a secret relationship. It was so childish of her. So irresponsible of him. And, in hindsight, he was bound to make his way on top of her sooner than later, she realized that now.

“Where are you now?”

“Wesss’ Park.”

“What!? Why!?”

“I don't wanna talk ‘bout it.”

“Well, that's too bad. Why are you there?”

“Ugh, I jus’ wandered in there, Ojisan—”

“That's not the kind of place you just wander into.”

“Well, ‘pparently it is.” He sighed.

“Please, just come home.”

“I am, there's a taxi right here.” Haruka still had a decent amount of the ¥20,000 she got from Akiyama-san, she'd be able to afford a trip home. She was in no state to walk that far.

☆☆☆

Haruka was drunker than she realized, and she tried to focus her energy on sobering up during the ride home. Of course, it didn’t work. It was a struggle to even walk straight, and when she entered the apartment she almost fell from bending over to take her shoes off.

“Haruka,” she suddenly heard Ojisan say. He was standing in the hall, facing the door, arms crossed.

“I’m home,” she said and moved to walk past him. He put his hand on her shoulder and stopped her in place.

“Haruka, why were you at West Park?”

“Seeing some old friends.”

“Uh-huh. Funny, I don’t remember you befriending any of the homeless people there, and I doubt The Florist would’ve been keen to hang out for hours with you.”

“Well, I did.” She walked away from him and ran into the little table in the living room on her way to the bedroom. She stifled a laugh at her own incompetence and kept walking, flopping onto her futon.

“Haruka, are you drunk?”

“Hm? What? Me? Nooooo, no way,” she said, not even looking up from her futon. Ojisan sighed and walked over to her. “It’s late and I have homework I need to do, can you just leave me be?” He stopped in place before walking back out into the living room. 

She did her best to do her homework, but all the numbers on her math handout were floating around, and the kanji on her other assignments were nigh inscrutable. She’d just finish it all during homeroom, it’ll be fine.

She couldn’t even be bothered to stand back up to take a bath and just undressed while she was still on the floor. She at least had the wherewithal to put her pajamas on before crawling back under her blanket on her futon. She felt so comfortable, the warmth was like a hug from her blanket. But she wished she could be feeling the hug of Akiyama-san instead.

Friday, 23 May 2014

Haruka woke up with a pounding headache. But she also woke up in the morning, the sun shining through her window. She woke up in the morning? It was morning! And she wasn’t kicking and screaming, she didn’t just feel his hands all over her, his body weight pressing on her. She slept all night. And she felt so much better. Not perfectly rested, of course; she still had plenty of sleep to catch up on. But she felt better than she had for the past two weeks. She still scrambled to get ready, needing to bathe as fast as possible and run to school so she had time to do all of her homework, but she had the energy to do it all!

“Sawamura-san, you’re looking lively today,” Akiyama-sensei said after walking into the classroom, watching her feverishly writing on some worksheet. For the first time in two weeks, she smiled at him.

“I slept really well last night, sensei!”

“Oh, that’s great to hear,” he said more kindly.

“Must’ve been tired from you keeping her up every night, finally left her alone last night, sensei?” a student said, pretending to try to be quiet but was still loud enough for everyone to hear. Her classmates snickered and Haruka rolled her eyes while Akiyama-sensei just sighed, defeated. He turned around and pulled out his phone.

💖: I guess we’re going to have to do that public statement, they’ve just not stopped.

Me: i feel lik thtll jst make tings worse tho

💖: What the principal and vice principal want is what they’ll get.

It sounded like the yakuza all over again. If they say it’s white, it’s white, even if it’s black.

“Haruka-chan, good morning,” she suddenly heard in front of her and she scrambled to put her secret phone away. It was Akari-chan. “You’re looking good today. Sleep well?” Haruka nodded.

“I did! I’m feeling so much better. I passed out at, like, 9 last night, didn’t even wake up until morning.” Akari-chan’s face lit up at the news. “Ok, let me finish my homework.”

“Ok, talk later,” she said with a wave and went to her seat.

☆☆☆

Mayflower’s blog:

Entry #10

i finly slept last nite!

ugh it felt sooooo gud 2 wake up aftr teh sun rose

evry1 noticed i wasnt doin gr8 b4 & was happy i was doin bettr

maybe it was teh booze?

i kinda went out last nite and hanged out wit sum homeless ppl

no biggy ive done worse!

A used 2 b homeless 2

ive hardly tlkd 2 him evr since teh rumors and teh nitemares started

but i was finly able 2 txt him 2day wit out feelin exausted

i feel soooo bad he looked so sad wen i was ignorin him

ill hafta find sum way 2 make it up 2 him

c u soon

☆☆☆

Mayflower’s blog:

Entry #12

u guyzzzzzzz ive ben such a scientist lately!

i tryd 2 sleep wit out drinkin agen 4 a couple nites but i had mor nitemares & didnt sleep

wnt back 2 teh homeless guyz wit sum ¥¥¥

told my dad i was hangin out wit frends

had a few

past out @ home

no nitemares

havnt goten a call from teh sykitrist yet so thisll hav 2 do

c u soon

Chapter Text

Thursday, 29 May 2014

Akiyama-san was turning 36. Still more than twice Haruka’s age. How cruel it was that his birthday would always be during midterms week. Haruka wanted to make plans, to surprise him with something. But it would have to wait for the weekend. At least she was still able to see him. At least this year his birthday was something they could celebrate together.

She considered going out and buying lingerie, but she feared he would think she wanted to… go all the way. True, she had fantasized about it before, quite a few times. But actually doing it? The thought was terrifying. No, she’d go for something much simpler.

On the morning of his birthday, she woke up even earlier than usual. It was difficult, she was feeling loopy from drinking the night before—she had gone back to West Park to drink again, the homeless men more than happy to have her company and her wallet. She was going to have to do some more betting at the arcade soon to keep up with it though.

“That anxious for your midterms, huh?” Ojisan asked her when he noticed her up and about while still in his futon.

“Y-yeah, I’ve got a couple difficult ones today, English and Environmental Science. I want to get to school early and make sure I’m as ready as possible.” Ojisan was snoring again before she even finished speaking.

The sun was still close to the horizon when she left. She was already feeling sleepy and was starting to regret getting up so early on a midterm day. But she had to get to the faculty office and put the note on his desk without anyone else noticing. Putting it on the teacher’s desk in Class 2-B was too risky, anyone could see the note and read it.

When she entered school grounds, she still somehow was not the first person there, but she was close to it. She lightly ran up the stairs to the faculty office and peeked inside. There were two teachers there, one of whom she really didn’t want to see her there.

“Haruka-chan, what brings ya here?” Majima-sensei asked.

“Majima-sensei! Good morning! You’re here early.”

“Same for you. Can I help ya with somethin’?”

“Oh, no, I was looking for someone else, I had a question before midterms started today.”

“Who? I can help ya find them.”

“Oh, no, you look busy right now, and I want to get back to class so I can get some last-minute studying in.”

“Alright, if ya say so. Good luck!”

“Thanks!” she said with a wave before exiting the faculty office and taking in a deep breath. That didn’t go nearly as planned. If it were just about any other teacher she would’ve been able to get away with it. But it just had to be Majima-sensei.

“Haruka-chan?” she heard from beside her.

“A-Akiyama-sa–sensei! Good morning!”

“Good morning,” he said with a teasing smile.

“Good morning, Aki-chan,” said Majima-sensei, suddenly behind her. He was leaning against the doorframe, squinted eye staring at Akiyama-san.

“Good morning, Majima-san,” Akiyama-sensei said, not at all disarmed by him.

“I, uh, gotta get to class, bye!” Haruka said before walking quickly away. When she turned the corner of the hall, she pulled out her secret phone.

Me: i was trynna leave a note @ ur desk but majima san was thr (＞﹏＜)

Me: i want it 2 b a surprise bt i dont think ill hav an other chance 2day

Me: can u come down the hall real quick

Barely thirty seconds later, he was standing next to her. He glanced around quickly before leaning down and kissing her.

“Akiyama-sensei!” Haruka shout-whispered. “What if someone sees!?”

“No one saw, it’s fine. Hardly anyone is here still,” he said, lifting his arm to rest it on the wall above her head and looking down at her. It was as if the rumors had never started, he was so relaxed about doing something like this when anyone could turn the corner and see them at any moment. Her classmates hadn’t let up on the comments, either, but they were still tame enough. Really, her being able to sleep made all of that easier to bear. “You said you had a note?” he asked, smiling. She dug into her bag and pulled out a small envelope before handing it to him. He started to open it, but she stopped him.

“Later!” she continued to shout-whisper.

“Oh? Too embarrassed for me to read it in front of you?” She looked away and blushed. “Can’t wait to read it,” he said, before giving her another kiss. He didn’t even look around this time. “See you later,” he said with a wink and walked off, note in hand. She leaned against the wall and sighed. Kissing in the hallway was so dangerous, but also exhilarating.

☆☆☆

God, she was so cute. How he managed to look at her every morning without saying or doing anything to her was beyond him. And now that she was sleeping again, her bright personality was back, which only made it harder for him to not put all of his attention on her during homeroom. Kissing her in the hall was mostly to get her riled up, but the danger of it only made it more exciting for him too. When he got back to the faculty office, Majima-sensei looked right at him.

“Something wrong, Majima-san?” He only continued to glare at him. Akiyama walked over to his desk and opened the note, not able to wait another second. He was always the one leaving notes—it was easy for him to just quickly shove it in her locker. Though he hadn’t left any since the day of the umbrella on the chalkboard—it would be much too easy for any of her classmates to look inside and see the note, and suddenly there were much more serious consequences if that happened. It was harder for her to pull off, so her making the effort to get a note to him today was something he had to appreciate and admire.

My devil (I just realized I don’t have a nickname for you! So this is a placeholder :P)

Happy birthday! Your 36 now, that’s so old! Before you know it I’ll need to help you wipe your butt :P I want to do something for you this weekend so expect me to stop by at around 3 on Saturday ok? I don’t know how you manage to write these notes, your so good with words >.< And its so embarrassing to… 

You make me smile whenever I think of you. Every morning I wake up with a smile knowing I’ll be able to see you in only a couple hours. I’m so happy to have you. 

Ugh, I’m no good at this, I’ll let you keep doing it instead. 

See you soon,

-H

He had no idea what she was talking about—reading her words made him all warm and fuzzy inside. She didn’t say those kinds of things nearly as much as he did, so this was a special birthday treat for him.

“Whatcha smilin’ at?” he suddenly heard behind him. Akiyama almost dropped the note and quickly turned to see Majima-san standing over him. How long was he standing there? How much did he see?

“Uh, I got a letter from a friend I haven’t seen in a long time! I’m happy they're doing so well!”

“Sure,” Majima-san said and walked back to his desk. Akiyama quickly folded up the note and shoved it in his pocket for safekeeping. He planned on putting it in his little box of things from her when he got home, the same box he put their photo booth pictures in, the little dog plush she won at the crane game that she gifted him, and any other little thing he had that came from her or reminded him of her. Even the spare charging cable she gave him the day after he crashed at her place. The day after he caught Hana and that guy Peter or whatever his name was at his house.

He still had no idea what Hana was up to outside of running Sky Finance these days, and he’d rather keep it that way, thank you very much. Just because he was perfectly happy with Haruka-chan didn’t mean that the memory of his now ex-wife’s betrayal didn’t still hurt.

He stopped himself there and returned to what he actually was supposed to focus on: the midterms he had to run. He was still teaching Home Economics, and thus he still had to make the midterms and monitor his students taking them. And it was just so boring.

Saturday, 31 May 2014

Akiyama kept looking at the clock since he woke up, 3 pm taking longer to come than any other day in existence. He rigorously cleaned his entire apartment the night before, and cleaned everything again today, somehow finding a million spots he had missed. The kitchen was spotless and glistening, the pillows on the couch were fluffed up perfectly, the bathroom smelled fresh and clean. And so, he sat in his recliner and waited.

Then, at 2:47, he heard a knock on the door. He quickly stood, adjusted his clothes briefly, checked his hair in the mirror, and jogged to the door. He opened it at a deliberately normal speed, and there she was, holding a plastic bag filled with groceries.

“Hi,” he said.

“Hi,” Haruka-chan responded. She stepped in, and right after she took her shoes off, he grasped her face and kissed her.

“So, what’s your plan, hm?” She lifted the bag of groceries.

“I’m making you dinner!” He hadn’t had homemade dinner in so long. At least, not a proper homemade dinner. Sure, he was capable of making food, and he was quite good at making sweet foods, but cooking meat and veggies was completely different, he somehow never got the textures right, no matter how much he tried. He remembered how wonderful her meals were when he was crashing at her place, and she probably only continued to improve as she made dinner for Kiryu-san every night. He felt a brief pang of envy for the man, but she was standing right in front of him with a full bag of ingredients right now. He felt so lucky.

“Is there anything I can do to help?”

“Not get in my way?”

“Yes ma’am,” he said, putting up his hands and stepping into the living room. He listened as she started to unload her bag and dig into his drawers and cabinets. “Can I show you where everything is, at least?” he called to the kitchen.

“Yeah,” she called back, sounding slightly defeated. He got up and walked over, and all her ingredients were hidden under the bag she brought them in and some paper towels. “I have to keep them a surprise,” she said when she saw him staring. He opened every drawer and cabinet to show her where everything was and grabbed a few things she needed—a knife, a cutting board, a frying pan, a baking sheet, and others besides.

“Holler if you need anything else,” he said as he went back to the living room. He continued to listen to the sounds coming out of the kitchen—a pan sizzling, a knife chopping, the oven door opening and closing. He had no idea what was going on in there, but he had full faith in her. At some point, she stepped into the living room and approached him.

“Stuff will be in the oven for a while,” she simply said before sitting on his lap in his recliner. He was surprised but happy to have her there. “Want to watch TV?” she asked, getting comfortable. He reached for the remote and turned on the TV. It was playing the news, a report on the war in Afghanistan and Pakistan. “I don’t want to watch this,” she said, and Akiyama changed the channel as the news moved on to talk about Psy’s music video for Gangnam Style becoming the first video on YouTube to reach 2 billion views. He switched over to some panel show, and the two watched in silence for a while, her head resting on his shoulder, her arms around his neck, his arm wrapped around her waist.

She shifted, and her hand started caressing his torso. Slowly, it wandered lower, before it reached his pants, and she caressed his thigh. He adjusted himself, and she moved her hand to his cock, firmly grasping it over his pants. He shuddered, and she started unbuckling his belt with one hand, the other still wrapped behind his neck, face still pointed at the TV. His cock was getting harder by the second, and she finished unbuckling his belt before unbuttoning and unzipping his pants. His hand that was around her waist started to wander too, rubbing from her thigh all the way up to her breast. She dug her hand into his pants, under the waistband of his boxers, and grabbed his hardened cock. He closed his eyes and groaned, and she slowly started moving her hand back and forth on it. He kissed her neck as she did so, not caring anymore if he gave her a hickey. She was going to be over for a while anyway. 

She shifted and kissed him in return, a deep kiss of longing. Her hand continued to rub his cock, quickening in pace, his breath getting shallower. He pulled her on top of him and moved his hand up her skirt and under her panties, and she lowered the waistband of his boxers to set his cock free. She was already so wet, and he pushed his fingers inside her as he rubbed her clit with his thumb. His cock was so close to her pussy, and part of him hoped she would let him fuck her right there on the recliner. But he knew that wasn’t going to happen, and he was ok with that. What she wanted was all that mattered. 

She then rotated to be able to suck him off while her pussy was right in his face. He moved her underwear to the side and immediately dove in before she even had a chance to start. She gasped, and he quickly got to work on her clit. And once she started on him in return, he had to focus to stay on earth. He didn’t allow himself to cum, he had to control himself until she got to first. He pushed his fingers inside her again, and carefully licked his tongue all over her, paying close attention to her moans as he focused in on the spot that she enjoyed most. She was doing her best to do the same for him, but she was quickly getting lost in her own pleasure, which only increased his own. Soon, she started grinding her hips against his face as she bobbed her head up and down on him, and he felt himself getting closer. Suddenly, she started moaning loudly and removed him from her mouth, but continued to jack him off as she moaned. She came with his tongue still on her, and he didn’t stop licking her up until he felt her all but collapse on him. His buildup of pleasure finally released, and his cum suddenly spurted out of him, and she quickly put her mouth around him again to take in and swallow his cum.

The two stayed in place as they caught their breath, and he rubbed her back. She looked over her shoulder towards him.

“Happy birthday,” she breathed out. 

☆☆☆

“Five minutes! Can you set the table?”

“Yes ma’am,” he said again and started digging for cutlery. He took the time to also put up some candles and start some music while he was at it. The smell from the kitchen was incredible, and his anticipation for what could possibly be on the menu only grew. Something was taken out of the oven to rest not too long ago, and she was finishing up something else on the stove while yet another thing was in a pot of boiling water. She clearly had the timing down perfectly so everything was done and ready to serve at the same time.

He put two plates on the countertop for her and moved to the table to eagerly await the food she had been planning to make for at least the last two or three days.

On their plates were slices of baked eggplant, chunks of seared lamb with a garlic and rosemary butter sauce, roasted potatoes, and in the middle of the table was a bowl of just made salad with a homemade dressing on the side.

“Wow, Haruka-chan, this…” he said, looking at everything placed in front of him. She walked over to him and gave him a quick kiss before sitting on the other side of the table.

“And there’s a raspberry chocolate tart in the fridge for dessert. Enjoy!”

☆☆☆

Akiyama hardly said a word during the entire meal, he was enjoying it so much. He ate until he was beyond full, it was so good. But even if it were disgusting, he would savor every bite that she had made for him. For him. More and more these days, he allowed himself to think about a blissful domestic life with her. One where he could wake up and see her rub her eyes in the morning. One where they would make dinner together every night. One where they could say ‘Good night, I lo–’

“Thank you so much for dinner and the tart, Haruka-chan. It was amazing.” She looked to the floor and smiled.

“I’m glad you enjoyed it.” She started taking plates to the kitchen, and he got up to help her. Once the table was cleared, they stood in place and stared at each other. 

“When do you need to be home?” he asked.

“I don’t,” she said. He quickly picked her up and slung her over his shoulder. She shrieked with delight and playfully kicked her feet as he carried her. He returned to the couch, eager to continue what they had started earlier. They were going to have some fun tonight.

☆☆☆

The two were cuddling on the couch, idly staring at the TV. They still had most of their clothes on, but almost nothing was in place. Haruka pulled out her phone to check the time. It somehow had become 9 pm.

“I should go,” she said regretfully.

“Ok,” he said, kissing her on the forehead. “Do you need to clean up at all?” he asked, looking at her disheveled hair and noting that the scent of his cologne was all over her.

“Maybe I should,” she said, sitting up and brushing his face with her hand. She walked over to the bathroom to shower and reset herself before going home to Ojisan. When she entered, she gasped. There, in the shower, were bottles of her shampoo, conditioner, and soaps of choice. “When did you get these?” Akiyama-san got up to walk over and see what she was talking about.

“Oh, well, I figured since you had showered here twice already, I should keep the bathroom stocked for you,” he said. “I hope I got the right brands, I tried my best to remember what I saw in your bathroom, but that was months ago. Did I miss anything?” She stared at the bottles, impressed that he managed to get everything almost exactly right. She imagined him at the store, shopping basket in hand, standing in the toiletries aisle and holding bottle after bottle, picking the right one for her. For her to use at his place. She had her own stuff at his place.

“No, it’s perfect.”

“Good. Let me know if there’s anything else you want me to get for you too. Oh, I got you a toothbrush,” he said, pointing at the cup that was now holding two toothbrushes next to the sink. “Yours is the red one.” She started to feel tears prickling in her eyes. “Oh my god, Haruka-chan, is everything ok? Damn it, did I come on too strong? Shit,” he said to himself.

“No, no, no. I… I’m so happy,” she was able to say. “I’m so happy I could die.”

“Really?” She nodded her head, not able to say anything else without risking tears falling from her eyes. She was feeling that ‘overwhelmed-but-in-a-good-way’ feeling again building up deep inside her chest.

“I… I… I should get showered,” she pushed out of her throat.

“Ok, I’ll leave you to it,” he said, stepping out of the bathroom. She took a few deep breaths. She almost said it right then. She really wanted to. But she needed to wait for the right moment. No way could she waste saying it for the first time while in the bathroom. 

Showering was quick and easy—it was as if she were at home. Well, she would’ve had a bath if she were at home, but still.

Home. This place was starting to feel like home. She still had only been here a handful of times, but each time it felt more and more like a place she belonged. A place you say “I’m back” and not a place you say “pardon for the intrusion”.

Towel wrapped around her, she decided to break in the toothbrush. Hopefully, she would use it again soon. She dried herself and put her clothes back on before stepping back out and finding Akiyama-san in the living room waiting for her.

“Hi, angel,” he said, standing up to hug her, and she tightly wrapped her arms around him in return. She rested her head on his chest, his heartbeat thrumming next to her ear. He was so warm, so comfortable to be with, despite being the man suddenly on top of her who brought her nightmares back. She just couldn’t bring herself to resent him for it. She looked up at him, and they shared a soft, tender kiss.

“Happy birthday,” she said again. “Sorry I couldn’t buy you something nice.” He stroked her hair and simply stared at her.

“What are you talking about? That food was divine. And even just being able to see you is enough of a gift for me. Thank you.” This was starting to feel like the right moment. But then a strange fear gripped her. Despite everything, there remained a seed of doubt within her. Doubt about his feelings, his intentions. Objectively, she knew that she was being ridiculous. But what if she did say it and he rejected her, told her he didn't feel that way? Or, worse, what if he did accept her feelings and something bad happened? She couldn’t live with losing someone like that again. Her mom had died over eight years ago, but that didn’t mean she was safe from tragedy. No, best to play it safe. She stepped away from him.

“I should go,” she said.

“Ok,” he said, walking her to the front door. “Want me to drive you home?” he asked, watching her put her shoes on.

“I mean, if you’re offering.”

“I am,” he said with a smile.

“Sure.”

The drive to her apartment was quiet but comfortable. They chatted here and there, but mostly she stared out the window, his hand on her thigh. When he parked, it was still just as hard to leave as every other time he dropped her off. She leaned over the center console and kissed him.

“I wish I could bring you inside with me,” she said.

“Oh, angel. I do too,” he said. “Maybe someday,” he added, and she stared at him. He kissed her once more and got out to open the door for her. She stepped out, and he pulled her in for a tight embrace. “I’ll see you soon, and text you even sooner, ok?” She nodded into his shoulder. “Ok,” he said, releasing her. “Bye.”

“Bye, I— I’ll see you later.”

After entering her apartment, she hid in the bathroom, let the bathtub water run, and pulled out the bottle of bourbon she stole from Akiyama-san’s kitchen cabinet from her bag.

☆☆☆

Mayflower’s blog:

Entry #15

red alert! red alert! i almost sed teh “L” word 2 A 2day >.<

at least i think thats how I feel abt him…

ughhhhhhh its so hard 2 kno!

they say u jut kno but how am i suposed 2 kno if ive nevr felt tht way b4 u kno???

i wish hed jst say it alredy!

unless he dont feel tht way abt me :(

what if i say it bt he jst says ''kthxbai''????

but lyk if he didnt feel tht way thn he wouldnt hav shampoo & stuff jst 4 me in his bathroom rite???

maybe i should turn on comments maybe sum of u can give me advice....

c u soon! 

Chapter Text

Akari

Ever since the first day of their second year, it was painfully obvious to Akari that Haruka-chan and Akiyama-sensei were seeing each other. It wasn’t so obvious to everyone else—if you didn’t know their history, they were pretty good at hiding it, for the most part. But she knew their history, and she noticed the little things they did. The way he smiled at her was different from the others. Whenever he talked about his “girlfriend” with Kasuga-sensei, everything he said sounded just like Haruka-chan. His charm on his pendant was suspiciously similar to Haruka-chan’s ninth charm on her bracelet, a charm that wasn’t there when she talked about which orphan gave her which. And the man put her directly in front of him in the seating assignments. How dumb could he be? At least put her farther back than the second row!

But she never pushed the issue with Haruka-chan. It was obvious that she wanted to—probably even needed to—keep it a secret. She wished she could hear all of the details and talk to her about it, but she was going to wait for Haruka-chan to say something first.

Then she stumbled across a blog. She was browsing on one of those sites that was an amalgamation of blogs from any kind of person about any kind of thing when one blog entry caught her eye:

Mayflower’s blog:

Entry #1

i hav a secret that i cant tell any1 so ill talk bout it hre on dis anonimus blog

im datin my teacher

wow (>⩊<) it feels so gud 2 finaly say it (๑>◡<๑) we new eachother b4 he became my teacher bt we didnt do anytin until after

''do anytin'' tht sounds so dirty (⁄ ⁄>⁄ ▽ ⁄<⁄ ⁄) we didnt evn kiss 4 long time n started holdin hands evn later

obvs we dont do any tht @ school... unless teh classroom door is locked (´つヮ⊂)

anywayyyyyy lik i sed 4 obvius resons i cant tlk bout anytin we do or say wit ANYONE so ill b sharin hre

c u all soon (⁠✿⁠^⁠‿⁠^⁠)

Someone was dating their teacher, huh? Why not give them a follow, Akari might learn a thing or two about what it was like. She could even use it as a guide on how to talk about it with Haruka-chan, should she ever actually tell her about her relationship.

It was a fun blog to read and was written like how a girl her age would. Of course, the taboo and scandal of what the author and her teacher were doing was a thrilling read too. But more and more things stuck out.

The second blog post mentioned that he was her homeroom teacher. The fourth one mentioned the two of them having matching charms on her bracelet and his necklace. She even wrote about what the two did while on a trip—taking a bullet train, seeing some flowers, going to an arcade, and eating crab. Didn’t Akiyama-sensei say he went to see a flower festival in Osaka with his girlfriend during Golden Week?

Akari tried to comment on one of the posts, wanting to gush with Haruka-chan about her exploits with Akiyama-sensei like they used to, but the comments were turned off. Probably for the best, who knows what kind of hate comments she’d get. Still, she hearted every single post, it was close enough.

Then there was the nail in the coffin. Post #7. Someone was spreading rumors, and she had to go see the principal about it. That was too uncanny.

AkariDances: guys u have to see this blog i think its haruka chans

AkariDances: scramblr.net/b/mayflower1996

ItsMFnAzusa: omfg fr? i gotta look @ this

MaiMelody: lol ur reading to much in to it

ItsMFnAzusa: idk alot of it maches

AkariDances: i wouldnt say anything if i wasnt like 99.9999999% sure

MaiMelody: i mean i gess?

MaiMelody: y wouldnt she tell us tho?

AkariDances: duh obv it has to stay a secret

AkariDances: if wat she wrote is tru akiyama sensei would b in a lotta troubble

ItsMFnAzusa: frfr!! ugh i wish we could talk abut it wit her tho

AkariDances: we can talk abt it wit eachother at leest

AkariDances: and we can b redy if she ever says anything

ItsMFnAzusa: truuuuuuuu

MaiMelody: ya i gess 

AkariDances: im following it so i get emails wen she posts

ItsMFnAzusa: ooh me toooooooo

MaiMelody: fine ill follow to

Akari was less enthused by the next few posts though. Blog posts about the author not sleeping because of nightmares, just as Haruka-chan was looking exhausted at school. She even wrote about experiencing the same thing last April. It wasn’t going to be anytime soon that Akari would forget about what happened in the gymnasium their first week of high school—Haruka-chan running away and getting sick at the start of their first class, Majima-sensei beating up Saejima-sensei during their second. Haruka-chan was exhausted for weeks after that too. No doubt in her or either of her friend’s minds about it being her after that.

Akari tried to ask about her sleep during lunch the day after she posted about not sleeping for two weeks, and her two friends tried to comfort her or make suggestions too, but Haruka-chan didn’t even register they were speaking half the time. And anything she did hear was quickly dismissed or shot down.

Then, entry #10 was posted. Akari opened the post immediately after she got the email notification. After how much better Haruka-chan looked that day, Akari had to read the post and find out what it ended up helping her. But as she read, her heart sank.

maybe it was teh booze?

i kinda went out last nite and hanged out wit sum homeless ppl

no biggy ive done worse!

A used 2 b homeless 2

It honestly hurt to read, learning that her best friend drank with a bunch of homeless people enough to pass out. And what did she mean by “I’ve done worse”? And Akiyama-sensei was homeless at one point?

Why couldn’t Haruka-chan share more about how much she was suffering, that she thought she had to drink to fall asleep? It looked like it only happened maybe two times, but that was two times too many. Drinking that much was supposed to be unhealthy, right?

MaiMelody: guys im getting scared for haruka chan

ItsMFnAzusa: me too

ItsMFnAzusa: thats kinda scary

AkariDances: should we talk to her about it?

MaiMelody: and tell her that weve been secretly reading her blog for weeks?

AkariDances: yeah?

ItsMFnAzusa: i mean its only been a few days

ItsMFnAzusa: maybe shell stop on her own?

AkariDances: i guess

AkariDances: should we talk to akiyama sensei?

AkariDances: he probably knows about it right?

MaiMelody: again are we supposed to tell him that we read her blog?

MaiMelody: i dont think he even knows about it

MaiMelody: no way would he let her spill so many details

AkariDances: >.<

ItsMFnAzusa: lets just wait and see

AkariDances: fine

At least they were all able to keep an eye on her. And at least they were all able to gossip again like they used to, Akari might’ve just exploded if she couldn’t talk to anyone about Haruka-chan almost telling Akiyama-sensei she loved him. And him keeping shampoo at his place for her? How did she land a guy so swoon-worthy!? High school boys were so lame.

June

Mayflower’s blog:

Entry #17

u gaizzzzzzz my classmates r so mean!!!!! (>﹏<)

they jst cant let go of the rumors abt me & A

there gettin worse abt it 2

i thot they got bored bt a cuple of them r way in2 it

& tht jst makes evry1 do more agen!

ppl laff @ me & call me a slut or a whore or teachers pet

i cant evn talk 2 him wit out ppl makin comments abt it

hes my homeroom teacher wat am i supposed 2 do!?!?!?!?

i hate it bt if i stop showin up or smth tht will jst make evry1 think there rite

wich they r bt they cant kno tht ..・ヾ(。＞.＜)シ

ugh this sux

i need a drink

☆☆☆

💖: Angel, are you ok? I see you doing your homework in homeroom every morning, and your other teachers have informed me that you've been missing assignments.

💖: If this keeps up I’ll need to have a meeting with you in the faculty office.

Me: r u gonna punish me sensei? (｡・//ε//・｡)

💖: I’m being serious, Haruka-chan.

💖: it looks like we need to make that public statement, too.

Me: y do i have to (；￣Д￣)

Me: cant they just have you do it?

💖: Sorry, that’s how it is.

☆☆☆

Mayflower’s blog:

Entry #21

who wood of thot tht gettin a drink evryday as a teen wood b so damn hard? (＞﹏＜)

ive got a small stash hidden in my room that i stole from A bt it wont last 4evr

teh homeless guzy lyk havin me there bt i cant jst sho up & drink all there booze evryday wen they don’t evn got housez

ugh any1 want 2 by me sum?

ill make it worth ur while lololol

☆☆☆

Me: You’ve not been so energetic at school lately, is everything ok? Is it the nightmares again? 

😇🩷🌸Haruka-chan🌸🩷😇: dont worry abt it

☆☆☆

For their public statement, Haruka and Akiyama-san had to stand on the stage of the auditorium in front of the entire student body and staff and speak into the microphone to tell everyone that they weren’t doing anything, that it was all professional, and that the rumors were false. It was so embarrassing for Haruka, she didn’t look at the audience once. Akiyama-san was able to stay calm, hands in pockets, and look just about the entire audience in the eye and say such things as “Sawamura-san and I have a strictly professional relationship” and “We are only a student and a teacher, we do not engage in any sort of physical activities, intimate or otherwise, in or outside of the classroom”.

This didn’t stop the rumors, naturally. And the few who weren’t aware very much were now. Haruka would have mean things scribbled on her desk or cruel notes in her locker. Akiyama started cleaning her desk and checking her locker every morning to remove any notes. But plenty of students would still write “slut” on her desk afterward, and plenty of notes still arrived after he checked. He stopped leaving notes himself, what if a student went in to leave a note only to find one from him and read it?

Akari noticed what he was doing and started doing her part to help, checking her locker and cleaning her desk when she could, but she wasn’t able to do it every day, or stop everyone. The campaign against Haruka-chan was spurred on the most by their two classmates Amon-san and Hori-san. Hori-san clearly had a crush on Akiyama-sensei, even during first year, so it wasn’t hard to understand her motivation. But she had no idea why Amon-san would play along and even be more brutal than Hori-san.

Akiyama considered having her transferred to a different class, but that could also just spur more rumors. Plenty of people would just take it as an admission of guilt. No, they just had to keep pressing forward. They’d have to get bored of the rumors sooner or later.

Haruka continued to get drunk every night to be able to sleep. Why bother with the psychiatrist when she had something that was already working? It was probably still cheaper than all the appointments and pills anyway. And now with the bullying and rumors not slowing down, she had one extra thing she wanted to not think about whenever possible. And alcohol helped her with that too.

☆☆☆

Me: How did you feel making that statement today? I, for one, was terrified the whole time we were up there.

          Read

 -

Me: We should go to the gardens again sometime this summer

Me: This time I'll kiss you without regret (´｡• ᵕ •｡`) ♡

😇🩷🌸Haruka-chan🌸🩷😇: whatever

 -

Me: Why are you ignoring my texts? You don’t even look at me at school.

😇🩷🌸Haruka-chan🌸🩷😇: im not ignoring u

Me: You basically do with responses like that.

☆☆☆

Mayflower’s blog:

Entry #22

im so clever u guyz ヽ(>∀<☆)ノ

obv the homeless ppl r not teh only ppl tht drink

i can jst ask teh punks hangin round teh conveniense store 2 by me sum

i also found teh bar A took me 2 on wite day once were teh bartender “knos” im 20

tht place is a lil ¥¥¥ tho so ive only gon once

my dad has sum stuff ill steal & jst refill teh bottle wit water

long as i dont ask dad or A 4 anytin its fine

im not *that* bad lol

c u all soon (〃＾▽＾〃)

Usami

It was such bullshit that Sawamura-chan wasn’t in Usami’s class again this year. Who allowed this!? He hardly ever saw her now! He’d catch a glimpse of her going to or leaving school, maybe try to exchange some words with her during lunch if her goddamn friends weren’t blocking him from approaching. The whole first month of school was him trying to get in edge-wise, but there was hardly any opportunity.

During Golden Week, he was supposed to spend 3 days with his dad. He only got an afternoon. His mom, meanwhile, spent a week traveling with friends. That was fine, it gave him plenty of time to plan a scheme to win her back. Part of it required some cooperation from his dad though, and he didn’t get as much opportunity to try to convince him as he had hoped. He’d spend hours thinking, stewing, planning while staring at the collage of Sawamura-chan he had made. She wasn’t looking anywhere near the camera in most of the pictures, she didn’t know most of the pictures were being taken. All the better, he got to see all sides of her. Yawning in class. Laughing at something. Looking shocked at some gossip her friend told her. Concentrating on an assignment in the library. Lazily staring at her phone. Eating lunch.

“Your great-uncle is sick,” his father told him out of the blue as they were eating dinner during the one afternoon he was with him.

“Oh, really? I’m sorry to hear that.” His father scoffed.

“It’s not like you’ve ever met him.”

“Not like you ever gave me the opportunity—” A palm swiftly across his cheek cut him off.

“No back-talking. I’m not your damned mother!”

“No, you’re my father!” Another smack.

“Exactly!” Usami stared at a stain on the tabletop, keeping his hands folded underneath. “Ungrateful little…”

Usami stayed quiet for the rest of the night.

Then, after Golden Week, something happened. Something BIG. Suddenly, half of the school was talking about her and Akiyama-sensei. That was just humiliating! Now everyone knew he lost to a teacher, and he was certain everyone was laughing about it behind his back! It was only 294 days ago that he got cucked by those two, everyone probably remembers they dated for an entire 47 days!

But for whatever reason, Sawamura-chan was the one taking the brunt of it. Plenty of his classmates were making snide comments about her, but hardly anyone did the same about Akiyama-sensei. That was even worse! He was supposed to be her white knight, the one to swoop in and protect her from all of this! But whenever he tried, his classmates just ignored him! At least he was doing more than Akiyama-sensei, he wasn’t doing shit about it all when it was all his fault to begin with! And she looked so tired too. What the hell was he doing to her!? And then they made that public statement, which only made things even worse.

His friends kept trying to convince him to just let go, but that only made him more determined. He knew they were meant to be! He just needed to give her enough space and time, she’d realize how much she missed him, realize that if they dated no one would make fun of her like they were doing, and would run into his open arms!

☆☆☆

Me: Haruka-chan, where do you go after school? Kiryu-san told me you’re hardly home when I called him to tell him you’ve been missing assignments. What are you doing instead of your homework?

😇🩷🌸Haruka-chan🌸🩷😇: dont worry abt it

Me: It’s my job to worry about it.

          Read

☆☆☆

“Haruka,” Kiryu said one day while they were having dinner after she stumbled home from god knows where. When she collapsed on the couch, he tried to ask her where she was. She just lied again and said she was out with her friends. Did she really think she was fooling him? Dinner was convenience store sushi that he picked up after work. Haruka hadn’t cooked anything in days. “I got another call from Makimura-sensei, why have you been canceling your appointments?”

“Because I don't need to go, Ojisan.”

“Oh, I think you do,” he said, crossing his arms.

“It’s not like I’ve been having nightmares or anything.”

“That’s not the issue. Akiyama-san had to call me again to tell me that you’ve still been doing your homework during homeroom and missing a bunch of assignments.”

“I’ve got it all under control. I passed all my classes last year and I wasn’t even sleeping. It’s fine.”

“What’s going on? This isn’t like you.”

“Don’t worry about it, Ojisan!”

“But I do worry—"

“Well, what are you going to do about it, huh?”

“We won’t go to Okinawa this year if you keep this up.”

“What!? Why!?”

“Because… Because I said so!” Haruka rolled her eyes. “That motivation enough for you?” She didn’t respond.

He was powerless. Nothing he said or did made any difference. He could forbid her from going out all he wanted, but what more could he actually do? Lock her in her room? Keep a guard at the front door? He wasn’t even sure he could follow through on not going to Okinawa. But he didn’t want the kids to see her like this.

He remembered that night he caught her and Akiyama-san almost kissing after the man came back drunk while crashing at their apartment. He saw bruises on her arm where he had grabbed her for days after, and it still ate him up inside. No way could he do that to her again. If only Yumi were still here. She was smart, she'd know what to do. Haruka needed a mother; he could only do so much for her.

So, he did nothing.

Chapter Text

Majima

“Oh, Majima-san, here’s some advice, on the house. Stay away from Makimura Makoto,” The Florist had said. Majima turned those words over and over in his mind. What could he possibly have meant by that?

After reconnecting with her a couple of months ago (what a small world for her to end up being Haruka-chan’s therapist!), they had met up a few more times. Just getting some coffee on the weekend and catching up. They had a lot of catching up to do, after all.

Well, he couldn’t ponder it too much. He needed to know how much The Florist was going to charge him for his request—physical evidence of that fucking guy corrupting his favorite niece. Once the rumors started spreading throughout the school, and just about every student and teacher had heard it, he was getting antsy. Haruka-chan and Aki-chan could only deny it for so long, but they wouldn’t stop unless he had something undeniable. And he had to take drastic measures to get it.

The Florist had a notoriously large network of homeless people he employed—they would run his computers, monitor and set up cameras, keep an eye on the goings-on of Kamurocho. Finding a specific moment would still take a while, and Majima wouldn’t be surprised if it took at least a couple of weeks for him to find anything.

The next day, there was a bouquet of flowers at his front door with a note. “Come to Purgatory” it simply said.

Majima couldn’t run fast enough to Purgatory when the final bell of the school day rang.

“Alright, Florist, I’m here, what do ya want?” Majima asked, still catching his breath as he stood in front of the man.

“You have two options. Pay with money or do a job.”

“Well, I ain’t exactly rollin’ in it.”

“Alright then, the job it is.”

“What, ya want me to fight in your coliseum again?”

“That’s an option, but I think I have something else for The Mad Dog.”

“If ya need me to kill somebody, your wastin’ your time. Haven’t done that in almost two decades and I plan on keepin’ it that way.”

“Oh, no, no, no, nothing so drastic. Just some intimidation here, some smuggling there, easy stuff for you, really.”

“Fine.”

“Perfect, expect the details to arrive in the coming days.”

“Ya needed me to come all the way here just to tell me that?”

“I needed you here to answer my question.” Majima rolled his eye.

“Have you made any progress?”

“I won’t start until you pay.”

“Fine.”

Another bouquet was on his doorstep three days later, tasks laid out on the note it came with.

1. Help smuggling weaponry at the docks, 10:30 tonight
2. Intimidate a rival gambling ring in the city into paying a cut to The Florist
3. Win one fight in the coliseum

He just couldn’t help himself .

The Florist was right about one thing—the tasks were more than easy for him. Now he just had to run to the docks and get started.

☆☆☆

As instructed, Majima arrived at the docks at 10:30 pm. He was tempted to wear his snakeskin jacket, bare chest underneath, but this was a covert operation, and he couldn’t risk failing the job and getting nothing from The Florist.

The docks were crawling with nondescript men wearing all black and sunglasses at night.

Losers .

At 11 pm on the dot, a yacht came into view. All its lights were off, and it took Majima by surprise. Who knew how many other ships were out in the water, shrouded in the night, making sure no civilian ships were anywhere near. As soon as it docked, about a dozen men filed onboard. Majima stayed in place—as far as he was concerned, he just had to make sure no civilians walked onto the dock, and no one ran off with the contraband. More men filed off the yacht, large crates in tow. As the crates were lined up on the docks, a man wearing a nice suit and fancy leather shoes approached them. He made a motion with his hand, and two men carrying crowbars ran up. They pried open the crate and started rifling through it.

One of them pulled out a gun from the crate and showed it to the man in the suit. He grabbed it, inspected it, nodded, and gave it back. He chose another crate at random and did the same. All correct. By the time he chose a third, over twenty crates of weapons were sitting and waiting, and the ship’s captain stepped onto the dock. He approached the man in the suit as the other men pried open the third crate.

That’s when the shouting began.

Christ, this shit never goes smoothly .

He put his hand to his back pocket, ready to pull his Demonfire Dagger as every other man on and off the dock pulled out a variety of bats, crowbars, pipes, and guns.

The shouting stopped. A silent standoff between the dealers. After several seconds, the man in the nice suit and the captain started to exchange words again. Majima was too far away to make out each word, but he caught a few here and there: “cheat”, “pay”, “scam”. 

Then the man receiving the weapons pulled out his own gun and shot the captain in the stomach in one swift motion. And all hell broke loose.

Men shouting. Guns firing. Bats swinging. Bones breaking. Blood spilling. It was an endless cacophony of brutality. And Majima was right in the middle of the maelstrom. And he couldn’t be happier.

He slashed at an arm. Stabbed at a thigh. Dodged a crowbar aimed at his head. Sliced at the calf in retaliation. That wasn’t enough to kill anyone, he knew what he was doing.

Oh, he had missed this. He was in his element for the first time in years. The Mad Dog ran wild. At some point he lost track of which side he was on, caring more about shedding blood rather than whose blood it was. 

Stabs in the back. Slashes in the shoulder. Slices on the face. He knew how not to kill.

Stabs in the chest. Slashes at the throat. Slices through the stomach. He knew how not to kill.

But he forgot he wasn’t supposed to.

Before he even realized it, he was the only one left standing. He had no idea who was alive, no idea whose pulse to check. He didn’t care. Instead, he just grabbed a phone off of a body, dialed 119 and then 110, and ran into the night.

When Majima opened his front door to leave for work the morning after, there was another bouquet. The note read: “Great job, Majima-san. You did exactly what I wanted you to do.”

Rage started to build in him. He had gone blank about the night before, not even remembering how the fight ended. But the news was running a story about it that morning. Helicopter footage of the docks showed corpses splayed every which way. Blankets being thrown over victims. Blood caked into the cement. Boxes of weapons being opened, its contents being tabulated and identified.

He played me. The motherfucker played me .

The note continued: “Next task, intimidate the rival gambling ring. Straight forward, no tricks this time.”

We’ll see about that .

☆☆☆

The complete details about the gambling ring weren’t sent until a few days later, and Majima had to take care of it that night. On the surface, it did look straightforward: just go to the ramen shop that was housing the ring, give the password, ask to see the boss, rough him up a little, and make sure he agrees to the conditions.

The shop was a favorite of Kiryu-chan’s, Kyushu No. 1 Star. Was Kiryu-chan even aware of the gambling ring underneath? Eh, probably.

“Ramen with extra soup and a half-side of rice,” he ordered at the counter. The chef walked him to an unlabeled door at the back of the restaurant, opened it, and welcomed him inside.

These places are always way too eager for a newcomer .

The gambling ring was the same as any other—poker, blackjack, baccarat, roulette, and other tables set up, dealers in striped vests and black pants standing at every table.

“Hi, friend, don't recognize your face. You new?” the chips cashier by the entrance asked.

“Yeah.” 

“Well then, welcome. How many chips you buying? ¥1000 per chip.”

“Nah, that’s alright, I just need a word with Mr. Jack.” The chip cashier’s eyes narrowed.

“Sorry, friend, but he doesn’t take visitors. How many chips you buying?”

“Oh, I wasn’t asking if I could see him.”

“Well, I’m telling you you can’t. How many chips you buying?” Majima walked away and started looking for any other entryways or people willing to talk. He barely made three steps before there was a hand on his shoulder. “You know what, friend? I think you might’ve ordered the wrong food at the counter. Let me take you back to your table.” Majima turned and swung a fist into his face. The cashier took the punch before he even realized it was going to happen and landed flat on his back. Gasps and stares from patrons surrounded them. Majima crouched over him.

“I just need a word with Mr. Jack. Where is he?”

“Get the fuck outta the casino,” the cashier said. Majima took out his knife and pointed it at the man’s face, hovering above his eyeball.

“I said, ‘Where is he?’”

“Stop harassing my employees, Majima-no-aniki.” Majima turned his head in the direction of the voice, to a familiar sight.

“Minami-chan? You run this place?” Majima stood and walked over to Minami Daisaku, a former member of the Majima family. He was a scrawny man but had some of that cunning madness that made him fit right in.

“I do, boss. Never imagined I’d see you in the underworld again after going straight and becoming an educator for the youth of Kamurocho.”

“I never did either, but here I am.”

“So, what brings you here? Oh, where are my manners? Come, let's go to a more private location,” Minami-chan said, leading Majima to a hallway hiding behind a curtain. Majima still didn’t trust this snake and kept his guard up. Minami-chan led him to a back room, decorated like a fancy parlor room from an old Western-style mansion. The guy even had a fucking butler. The butler walked over to the two with a glass tray carrying a crystal bottle of something amber and two crystal glasses.

“Must be doing pretty well for yourself, Minami-chan,” Majima said, sitting on one of the chaise lounges.

“The house always wins. Bourbon?”

“No, thanks.”

“So, what brings you down here to my little corner of the underworld?” Minami-chan asked, sitting down on a dark leather Chesterfield chair.

“You familiar with The Florist?”

“I wouldn’t be this successful if I weren’t.”

“That so?”

“The right information is valuable to anybody. Why are you asking?”

“Well, he thinks you’ve gotten a little too successful. You’re going to have to start paying him 30% of your earnings.” Minami-chan only laughed.

“You always were hilarious, Majima-no-aniki, that’s hysterical! What is it, actually?”

“That’s exactly what it is.”

“Jokes are only funny for so long, Majima-no-aniki.”

“Which is why I’m not telling one.”

“Hmm. I see,” Minami-chan said, waving his hand at the butler, and the butler left the room. “And what makes you think I’ll agree to this?”

“You will, whether you like it or not.”

“Oh? What are you gonna do, stab me? I know you swore to never kill again after that little incident back in 19—” Majima stood so fast the chaise lounge scraped across the floor. He stomped over and grabbed Minami-chan by the collar.

“First of all, you sniveling little weasel, don’t you fucking dare bring that up again, got it?” Minami-chan’s eyes widened. “Second of all, my little streak broke not too long ago, and I’m still pissed off about it. I may as well kill again now, I don’t give a shit anymore.” Minami-chan started to quake. “I know you sure as hell don’t have the guts to do it with your own hands, you never did. Always had some other sorry punk trying to make it in the family do it for you.” A bead of sweat ran down Minami-chan’s face. “Third, and finally, most of all, I need you to take this deal. And what the boss wants, the boss gets, right? If it’s black, it’s black, even if it’s white.”

“W-well, you’re not my bo—”

“I SURE AS FUCK AM!” A pool of piss started to show in Minami-chan’s pants. “Just because the Tojo Clan dissolved doesn’t mean you don’t still answer to me! Every single one of my guys would come back at the drop of a hat, and you’re no exception!” Minami-chan started to whimper. “SO!? You taking the deal!?” Minami-chan quickly nodded.

“Yes! Yes, boss! 35%, no, 40% of my earnings will go straight to The Florist!” Majima let the man go.

“Good. I’ll send word to The Florist, and he’ll have some other guy send a contract. And you know I can find you if you try to swindle your way out of it.” Minami-chan quickly nodded again, hands clenching the armrests. Majima walked out without another word.

☆☆☆

Once again, as Majima left for work the next morning, another bouquet was at his doorstep.

“Someone’s trying to court you, Majima-san! You have a girlfriend or something?” one of his elderly neighbors asked.

“Nah, just some manipulative asshole using me like a fucking puppet.”

“O-oh, I see. Well, best of luck!” she said, quickly stepping back into her apartment and locking the door. Majima picked up the bouquet and found the note inside.

‘I knew you were the man for the job. You just have to complete your final task for me. Win one fight in my coliseum. I’ll summon you when you’re needed,’ it read.

Who the fuck am I gonna fight? Can’t let my guard down for a second with this motherfucker .

All of this just for video evidence of something that still might not even be happening. But if it was to protect Kiryu-chan’s little girl—hell, she was basically his own little girl—he’d do anything.

When he finally received his summons a couple of days later, he dashed straight to the coliseum—he couldn’t wait another moment to get this shit over with.

“Majima-san, you finally made it!” The Florist said, meeting Majima at the entrance to Purgatory.

“Yeah, sure, who am I fighting?”

“Patience, patience. Follow me.” The Florist guided Majima through Purgatory. “Today’s matches aren’t fights to the death, so don’t worry about that.”

“You fucking taunting me?”

“No, just alleviating your worries.” Majima was grateful, but no fucking way was he gonna say that. “Go into the back room. You’ll find out who you’re fighting when you step in the ring.” Majima groaned and walked in the direction The Florist was pointing as if he didn’t already know from fighting in that coliseum more times than he cared to count. He sat waiting for his turn for probably an hour by the time his name was called.

“Ladies and gentlemen, what a show it’s been so far! Tonight we’ve seen blood, guts, gore, all that good stuff! Are you ready for our final fight!?” the announcer bellowed, and the crowd cheered.

“Alright, your time to shine,” The Florist said to him.

“In this corner, we have a legend of the underworld, a pillar of the former Tojo Clan, head of his own family. Give it up for The Mad Dog of Shimano, Majimaaaa Goroooooo!” Majima walked out into the stadium, bright lights briefly blinding him as he walked up to the ring. The crowd cheered loudly, chanting his name.

“And in this corner, we have another legend of the underworld, also of the former Tojo Clan. But this man’s accomplishment has gone down in the history books, taking out eighteen men of the Ueno family single-handedly, using just six revolvers back in 1985.”

You gotta be fucking kidding me .

“Give it up for the tiger of Sasai, Saejimaaaaaa Taigaaaaaaa!” The crowd continued to cheer, and Majima watched his former kyoudai approach the ring across from him. He was haggard and worn down, and his head was shaved, but there was still a fire in his eyes—he wasn’t going to take Majima’s punches lying down, not like last time. He stepped into the ring and locked eyes with him.

“Kyoudai,” Saejima said. Majima didn’t dignify that with a response. He just took his fighting stance and waited.

“Tonight’s fight is no holds barred. Any weapons, any move sets, any fighting styles are allowed. This isn’t a fight to the death, but if someone dies, oh well!” The crowd cheered more. “Let's get this party started!” The bell dinged, the crowd cheered one last time, and Majima and Saejima paced around the ring, not taking their eyes off each other.

“Never thought I'd see your sorry mug again,” Majima said. “You been hiding down here all this time?”

“Better than going back to jail, to death row.” Majima scoffed.

“Figured you'd accept your punishment by now, felt sincere remorse or whatever.”

“Got used to the outside, and fighting here’s still my punishment anyway. Still don't see the sun all that often. But at least the food's good.”

“You don't deserve to live even this well.”

“Yeah? And you do?” If he had been asked that question two weeks earlier, Majima would say ‘yes’ in a heartbeat. But then the incident at the docks happened. His soul would be paying for that for eternity if it weren’t already for all that he had done while in the yakuza. For what he had done in 1995. Sure, there probably wasn't a single good man at those docks, but murder was still murder.

“Least I don't fuck little girls.”

“I wasn't myself.”

“Bullshit, it’s not like a fucking alien took over your body. And that girl is still paying for it. She will be for a long time.” Someone in the audience shouted for them to get on with it. “Fine by me,” Majima said and pulled out his knife, stabbing it forward in one swift motion. Saejima dodged and jabbed his elbow toward the back of Majima's head, only for Majima to drop to the ground before he could make contact, and Majima swung his legs, knocking him to the floor. Saejima rolled away just before Majima stabbed him in the chest then got up and dashed forward, sending a solid punch to Majima's face. He fell back against the mesh at the edge of the ring and ducked just before Saejima punched him square in the face again. As Saejima’s fist hit the mesh, Majima slashed the man’s thigh with his knife before somersaulting away. He could've easily stabbed him in the stomach, but he still wanted to put on a show. And make him suffer.

Saejima flinched, held his thigh on impulse, and looked back towards Majima just in time to see him stab him in the shoulder. Saejima grabbed him and kneed him in the stomach, then kneed him in the face as Majima doubled over. Majima fell on his back, and Saejima moved to stomp on his head, but Majima stabbed upwards, through his boot to the other side. Saejima yelled and stumbled face down onto the floor, knife still through his foot. Majima scrambled over and pulled the knife out of his foot. He sat on Saejima's back and stabbed his hand, pinning it to the floor of the ring. The crowd started to count. At count ‘6’, Saejima suddenly lifted himself up, knocking Majima backward. Saejima stumbled to the edge of the ring, catching his breath and inspecting his wounds. Red splatters painted the ring. Majima stood back up.

“Ready to give up!?” he shouted at his former kyoudai. Saejima said nothing and looked back up at him. “Guess not,” Majima said, walking towards him.

As he expected, Saejima shouted and ran up to him with a punch ready to fly. Majima may as well have seen him running from a mile away. He stepped aside just enough to not get hit but was still able to point his knife straight into his stomach. Saejima never learned. 

He kneeled to the ground, grasping at the knife in his stomach as Majima paced around him. His breath was hollow, and he spat some blood from his mouth.

“Give up now?” Majima said, all too calm for what he just did. Again, Saejima said nothing. Majima kicked him in the head. “Answer me!” he shouted, as Saejima fell to the side. The crowd began to count. Saejima did not get back up in time. The crowd chanted Majima's name, and Majima walked over to get his knife back. He kept his guard, not knowing if Saejima wasn't done fighting even though the official match was over. He swiftly pulled his knife out of Saejima's gut and flicked the blood off of it before returning it to its sheath. The announcer said something about the final match, but Majima stopped listening long ago. He simply turned and walked back to the room he walked out from.

“Quite the show,” The Florist said.

“Shut the fuck up. I've completed my payment, you still plan on getting me what I want?”

“I'm a man of my word. I'll contact you as soon as I have what you need.” Majima nodded and kept walking, out of the coliseum, out of Purgatory, out of West Park. He kneeled on the ground when he exited the men's restroom the secret door was in, and did his best to process the fight he just had.

He slammed his fist on the ground, swore under his breath, stood, and slowly walked home. Time was going to march on; he might as well too. He had done what he had to, and now he just had to wait for The Florist to deliver.

Chapter Text

Tuesday, 17 June 2014

“Here,” Akiyama said, passing an envelope to Haruka-chan. They were having another conference in the faculty office about her performance in school, the only time Akiyama could have her whole attention on him. He had finished his chastising, and she took it in surprise. “Go on,” he said after she hesitated to open it. She finally did it and inspected the contents.

“What—”

“Let’s go to Sotenbori again,” he said in a hushed tone, leaning in. No one else was in the faculty office, but he wasn’t as fearless about acting like more than a teacher around her these days. She stared at the bullet train tickets that were in her hands.

“Why?”

“Do I need a reason to spend a day out with my girlfriend?”

“But…” He raised his brows.

“But what?” She didn’t respond. “Remember how much fun we had when we went during Golden Week?” She nodded. “I think we need a day like that again.” Haruka-chan lowered her head, her hands, almost her entire body. “Hey, hey, it’s ok. I’m not blaming you. I know things have been rough—” She rolled her eyes, which surprised him. “I just think a nice day that’s just the two of us would do us some good.”

And I need to get ahead of something going wrong between us. I can’t let what happened between Hana and me happen again.

“So? Will you go with me?” he asked when she didn’t meet his gaze.

“Ok,” she finally said. He sighed, more relieved than he expected to be.

Saturday, 21 June 2014

He picked her up that Saturday, though not as early as last time. While the train ride was, unfortunately, always going to be almost three hours long, it was a Saturday, and Haruka-chan told him she was still somehow skirting by without a curfew. They arrived a bit after 1 pm, the river that ran through Sotenbori glistening from the beaming summer sun.

Upon arrival, he took her hand and led her to Iwao Bridge. Once they reached the center, he had them stand on the side for a selfie together, the water stretching out behind them, not quite as far as forever. He took the opportunity to have her pose for a couple of more photos, complimenting her to capture that beautiful genuine smile of hers.

“What do you want to do?” he asked her once he was satisfied. She looked to the side of her, to the end of the bridge. He followed her gaze and smiled. “I should’ve guessed.” His eyes landed directly on the Sega arcade, peeking over the top of the buildings in front of it. He looked back at her, and she smiled up at him. He reached for her hand, and, after she reflexively noted her surroundings, she took it and led him down the bridge.

Except, she didn’t go straight to the arcade. Instead, she guided him to a convenience store that was a couple of shops ahead of it.

“Hungry? We can get lunch first,” he offered. They hadn’t eaten any food on the train, and breakfast was now at least five hours ago.

“No, I don’t need a full meal,” she responded, eyes scanning the aisles. She finally landed on something, and he walked over to see what she was eyeing, expecting some premade onigiri or maybe a tonkatsu sandwich.

Instead, it was some cheap beer.

“You hated this stuff last time.”

“I wanna try again. Now that I know what I’m expecting I might like it more.”

“And what makes you think I’ll buy you these anyway?”

“Not like you never gave me alcohol before.”

“But that was to celebrate—”

“If you really cared you wouldn’t have offered me any last time we were here. Or shochu when we went to karaoke or spiked my drink at that fancy restaurant without even asking me or—”

“Ok, I get it, I get it. But all I’m getting from this is that I shouldn’t be offering it to you nearly as much as I do.”

“I thought today was about having a fun day for the two of us.”

“You think we can’t do that without beer?”

“Do you want me to be mad and ignore you for the next hour?” Akiyama sighed.

“Fine. But don’t think I’m buying you booze whenever we go somewhere, alright?” She clapped her hands and bounced, her ponytail flying around her.

“Yay! Thank you, Akiyama-sensei,” she said in that sing-song way elementary school kids do when they're told to thank a guest speaker at an assembly.

“I’m such a bad influence,” he said, mostly joking.

After they stepped outside, Haruka-chan immediately dove for the six-pack, and Akiyama took the opportunity to light a cigarette. Not smoking on the train was rough. Thank god the school had a designated smoking area that he could go to between periods.

After the first long drag, he looked at Haruka-chan, who was in the middle of chugging a beer can.

“Slow down there, young lady. I can’t have you stumbling around drunk, you’re still underage, you know.”

“Isn’t that part of the fun?” she asked, mouth grimacing as she spoke. “Besides, one beer won't be enough to make me noticeably drunk.”

“Really? What makes you so sure?” She paused, looked at the can, then looked at him.

“I mean, the proof of beer is way lower than anything else you’ve given me, right?”

“I mean, not way lower than champagne, and that stuff got you pretty tipsy pretty quickly last time.”

“But don’t wine and beer make you feel different kinds of drunk? At least, that’s what I’ve heard.”

“I suppose so. Either way, just be careful.” He leaned in closer to speak in her ear. “The last thing we need is me getting arrested while halfway across the country with my underage girlfriend who’s also my student.” She blushed, moved only her eyes to look at him with a coy smile, and quickly gave him a peck on his cheek. “Cheeky girl.”

She downed the can with a satisfied sigh and crushed it in her hand. After tossing it into a nearby bin, she grabbed his hand and dragged him to the arcade.

She was right, one beer wasn’t enough to make her noticeably drunk, even on an empty stomach. Maybe the cheap stuff had less alcohol than he thought? He couldn’t inspect the packaging inside the arcade though, so he couldn’t be sure.

He let her do some of their betting games again, but she didn’t only ask for money this time.

“If I get a hat trick within the first two rounds of darts, I get another beer after!” Akiyama had to think before agreeing. On the one hand, darts required a lot more dexterity and hand-eye coordination than most other games, so if she were drunk and just hiding it really well, she’d never win. On the other, if she really was skilled enough, and there was a non-zero chance that she was, then, drunk or not, she’d have a second beer. Then she really would be drunk, and he’d have to keep her from stumbling around Sotenbori—her tolerance must be way too low for two beers, especially on an empty stomach. The last time he gave her any alcohol was probably when they came to Sotenbori last time, and she didn’t have more than a sip. Before that was probably White Day, and that was, well, way too much for anyone.

And that was the night she said 'Good night, I love you' in her sleep.

“Ok, but if you don’t, then—” He stopped short. Then what? He would finally tell her? This wasn’t a good place for that. If she rejected him or if he pushed things too far by saying it, they’d still have to take the entire bullet train ride back to Kamurocho.

“Then what?” she asked, pulling him out of his thoughts.

“Then…” He glanced around the arcade. “Then you’ll have to take an embarrassing photo at the photo booth.” She laughed, a quick loud outburst.

“Really? That’s the best you can do? Fine, deal!” She put out her hand, and he shook it.

She got a hat trick immediately.

She was about to drag him outside when he asked, “Don’t you want to play anything else first?”

“I can come right back in.”

“The can isn’t going anywhere.”

“Neither is the arcade.”

“Why are you so desperate for one? Did you really like it that much?” He recalled her grimacing as she drank, she probably found it as disgusting as last time.

“Oh my god, Akiyama-san, don’t be so lame! It’ll just make things more fun!” He hesitated before letting her go. She was back not even three minutes later and immediately yanked him down by his shirt collar, pulling him in for a strong kiss in front of everyone in the arcade, the taste of beer dominating everything.

“How you feeling?” he tentatively asked.

“Fantastic!” He stared at her for a little longer before nodding.

“Alright, what do you want to play next?”

☆☆☆

After the arcade, they stopped for a late lunch at the same crab place they had eaten last time.

“You’re getting what you want, correct?” Akiyama asked her when they sat down. She rolled her eyes.

“Fine, yes, I will.” He nodded and opened the menu. After maybe 30 seconds of looking over the various meals on offer, he flicked his eyes up to her and she had an inscrutable look on her face.

“What?” he asked her.

“You’ll get me whatever I want, right?”

“Yeah, like I tell you every time. Have you finally learned how to ask for what you want?”

“I’m looking at the Shiosai, and, um…” She looked at him through her lashes, back at the menu, then back at him. “Maybe you can get me some sake?”

“First beer, now sake?”

“So, when I finally ask for what I want, you won’t get it for me?” He sighed and ran his hand through his hair. What was up with her today? Had she always been this eager to drink, and was now comfortable enough to ask? Had he really given her enough for her to think it was normal?

Not like there’s much normal about the two of us, or even her in particular.

“Which one?” She clapped her hands together.

“The genshu one, please!” He looked over the menu.

“The one with the highest ABV?”

“Oh, is it? I hadn’t even noticed! Oh well, that’s the one I want.” Akiyama squinted his eyes ever so slightly.

“Ok.”

☆☆☆

“Is there anything you wanted to do, Akiyama-san?” Haruka-chan asked after exiting the restaurant. He pulled her in for a hug and kissed her tenderly, in full view of the city.

“That’s all I wanted to do. Kiss those smiling lips of yours out in the open for everyone to see.” She smiled up at him and held him tightly. “Anything else you want to do?”

“Let’s just walk and see what we find.”

“Ok,” he said and took her hand. They crossed Iwao Bridge and continued south before turning right and passing a small, triangular-shaped park, some tough army-looking guy standing in one corner.

“It’s so sad that kids don’t have many places to go when in a city like this,” Haruka-chan commented.

“They shouldn’t be here in the first place.”

“Not like they chose to be here.”

“But their parents did.”

“I bet plenty of their parents would rather be able to leave their kids elsewhere while working, but we don’t live in a perfect world.”

“I guess you’re right.”

After passing the park, they turned onto the next street.

“Akiyama-san? Sawamura-san? What brings you two to Sotenbori?” Immediately the two separated their hands—Akiyama thought his hair was about to fly from his head.

“Park-sensei! Good afternoon! I came down here just for a solo day trip and happened to run into Akiyama-sensei!”

“I see. And what about you, Akiyama-san?”

“I… came down here to scope out a new location for Sky Finance, yeah.”

“Oh, really? Business must be good, then.” He chuckled half-heartedly.

“What about you, Park-sensei?” Haruka-chan asked.

“Oh, I’ve got some old friends that live down here.” She turned and pointed to the building behind her. “One of them runs this idol agency.”

“‘Dyna Chair’? What’s that mean?”

“No idea. You better skedaddle before one of them sees you and—”

“Mirei-chan, you didn’t tell me you knew such a cute girl!” a man in a gray pinstriped suit jacket and glasses suddenly called out as he stepped out of the building toward the group.

“Hiroshi-kun, leave the girl be.”

“Hi, I’m Horie Hiroshi,” he said to Haruka-chan, completely ignoring Park-san. “Here’s my card.” She took it and stared at it before looking back up at him. “Ever dreamed of being an idol, sweetheart?”

“No.”

“Well, dreams can take time to grow. You ever listened to idols growing up?”

“No. We only listened to Enka in the orphanage because that’s what the caretaker liked to listen to.” Akiyama had to stifle a laugh. He was sure Haruka-chan was telling the truth, at least to some degree, but he had a feeling she enjoyed making this guy squirm. He wasn’t about to stop though.

“You got any friends that like idol music?”

“No, they think it’s a predatory industry and don’t want to support it.”

“You know how much money an idol makes?”

“It probably all gets taken by the label anyway, right?”

“Not all of it! In fact, idols are salaried workers!”

“Oh, so they don’t make anything off of royalties? Or from live performances? Or merch sales?”

“I see you’re a skeptic, which is perfect! A lot of girls come in with lofty dreams but don’t have the motivation to do the work! But you? No, you would come in knowing exactly what you’re signing up for and what you need to do to make your dreams come true!”

“My dreams?”

“Yeah!”

“But I already told you I never dreamed of being an idol.”

“Give it a rest, Hiroshi-kun, she’s not interested,” Park-san interjected.

“Oh, she’ll come back, she just needs some time to think on it.” Haruka-chan looked down at the business card again, looked to her left, to her right, back at it, at Horie-san, then walked to the nearest recycle bin and tossed it in. Akiyama couldn’t contain his laughter that time. Her wit was one of a thousand reasons why he loved her. Horie-san collapsed to his knees. 

“Told you,” Park-san said. “Sorry about him, Sawamura-san.”

“Oh, no, it’s ok, he’s just doing his job.”

“Always so understanding. Alright, I’ll let you continue your ‘solo’ day out. See you Monday at singing club. Good luck scoping out for your business, Akiyama-san.” Both thanked her, and she turned and walked away. When she didn’t turn back around, Akiyama grabbed Haruka-chan by the arm and pulled her back toward the park, out of sight from her.

“You think she saw us?” he asked her.

“She didn’t seem suspicious.” He sighed.

“Sorry, this was supposed to be a day we didn’t need to hide.”

“It’s not like either of us knew. Come on, let’s not let this spoil our day, yeah?”

“Alright,” he said, keeping his hands in his pockets. 

☆☆☆

As they walked, hands staying firmly to their sides, they passed a large cabaret club. Haruka-chan tugged on his sleeve and pointed at it.

“Ooh! Let’s go here!”

“What? Why? You had no interest last time. You’re not even old enough anyway.”

“Oh, come on! Let’s have a new experience!”

“We can just go to Elise instead—”

“But Elise doesn’t have a whole-ass concert hall!” Akiyama was briefly taken aback by her saying ‘ass’.

“Again, you’re not even old enough.”

“Ugh, don’t you carry, like, a shit ton of cash on you, Mister ‘I-don’t-trust-banks’? We can try some of that really fancy champagne!”

“I can buy that myself anytime. And you want me to bribe them to let you in? These kinds of places aren’t so easily swayed. Come on, let’s go.” He took her hand to lead her away from it, but she dug her heels into the pavement. He looked back at her. “What’s going on?”

“What do you mean?”

“You’ve not been yourself today, and you haven’t for a while.”

“Damn, it’s almost like I had a flashback about when I was raped because of you and was having nightmares every night for weeks.” His heart sank. She said it so plainly. He pushed through.

“Did the nightmares start again? You were looking more well-rested for a little bit, but you’ve not been as energetic at school lately.”

“Why would I be? I’m sure you’re well aware of what all my classmates say about me. That public statement didn’t do shit! And you’re not doing shit about it either!”

“That’s not true, young lady! I clean your desk, I take notes out of your locker—”

“But you don’t say anything to them!”

“There’s not much I can say!”

“You can at least try! ”

“That’ll just fuel the fire even more!” She stomped her foot.

“You’re the worst!” He stepped toward her and reached out his hand.

“Whoa, whoa, hey, let’s not go there—"

“Don’t touch me!” she shouted, pushing his hand away from her. He stood still, silently staring at her, ignoring the small audience they were garnering. She breathed heavily, fists clenched, staring at the ground.

“Are you still drunk from that sake or something?”

“No, but I wish I was,” she said, eyeing the plastic convenience store bag he was still carrying. He looked down at it and back at her.

“I’m not giving you another beer.”

“Come on! There’s still four more in there!”

“And there will be for the rest of the day.” She let out a whine before diving for the bag. He dodged her, lifting the bag and stepping aside. She tried again and he dodged again. “I’m taking you home, young lady. Let’s go.”

“I don’t wanna!”

“Are you seriously throwing a tantrum right now? Like a child?”

“You’re the one who brought up that I was underage earlier.” He sighed in frustration.

“Fine, have your fucking beer,” he said, tearing the box open and yanking one out before shoving it into her chest. Her mood shifted as soon as she heard the satisfying click of the can opening, an equally satisfied smile on her face. She confidently chugged it, grimacing again when she removed it from her lips.

“Let’s go home,” she said with a smile and took his hand.

She drank a fourth on the bullet train back.

☆☆☆

Me: Angel, you haven’t texted me first in a couple of weeks, are you mad at me?

😇🩷🌸Haruka-chan🌸🩷😇: no

Chapter Text

July

Finals week suddenly arrived, and Haruka had been sleeping soundly.

But on the first day of finals, she struggled, much more so than she did last year. Were the subjects this year really that much harder? Each test was more formidable than the last, and she was having a tough time focusing. She would always wake up with her head pounding, the light of the sun beaming through her window burning her eyes, and she was also nauseous most mornings, pushing the limit of how much she could drink in a night and how quickly. She had to start getting efficient if she was going to be home enough to not make Ojisan suspect anything.

She hardly had time for Akiyama-san these days, and when she did, it was a chore. How he figured out what she was doing every day after school, she had no idea. He was always pestering her, telling her to stop, asking her how he could help, acting like he knew what was best for her. He was starting to sound like he was her dad or something.

💖: Angel, please, I know I caused all of this, help me make it right. Please.

‘I know I caused all of this’? Ugh, enough with the self-flagellation.

After her finals were all graded, she was in big trouble. She only passed two of them, and she was barely skimming the threshold. Akiyama-sensei summoned her to school two days into the break.

“Sawamura-san, as your homeroom teacher it's my duty to make sure you succeed,” he said, other members of staff on site for their own reasons. He lowered his voice and said, “Please, Haruka-chan, just tell me what's wrong and what I can do. I'm begging you. Please.” 

“I’m sure plenty of other kids failed those exams,” she said at a normal volume.

“No, Sawamura-san, they didn’t. You weren’t the only one to fail any of them, but most of your classmates by far passed all of theirs.” She rolled her eyes. He must be exaggerating, trying to make her feel bad or something. “Young lady, that’s not the kind of attitude you should have with your homeroom teacher,” he chided, pointing at her.

“What-EVER,” she said, leaning her head back. Akiyama-sensei rubbed his eyes and face in frustration.

“Well, you still have to come back Friday and take remedial exams for all the ones you failed,” he said, not daring to remove his hand from his face, not daring to look at her.

“Fine. Can I go?” she asked, already standing. He dismissed her with a wave, still not looking at her. She left without a word, not even a second glance. But just as she was turning the corner into the hall, he chanced a glance her way, and the sun caught her charm bracelet. She still always wore it, the charm he gifted her still attached. And he still always wore his charm. For now, that was still enough.

But Akiyama was running out of energy. He went through so much with Hana last year. It was supposed to be different with Haruka-chan. He didn’t have the strength to lose her too. Not like this, watching her slowly drift away from him in an amber bottle. 

☆☆☆

Mayflower’s blog:

Entry #28

yalllll i hav a life hack (b ᵔ▽ᵔ)b

jst fail all ur exams lololol the retakes r sooooooooo eazy (o˘◡˘o)

cant beleve they made teh exams pretty much unpassible tis year (҂ `з´ )

bt i kno i past all teh retakes ଘ(੭ˊ꒳​ˋ)੭✧

i knew i ws doin fine

ppl need 2 stop worryin so much

now 4 a drink 2 celebrate lol

☆☆☆

Me: Want to go to the beach this summer? I might have to pretend to be your dad, but I'm already your old man haha

          Read

—

Me: Angel, it's been days since you've responded. Please, talk to me.

          Read

☆☆☆

Mayflower’s blog:

Entry #30

ugggghhhhh ths sux!

we wre supposed 2 visit family in okinawa agen ths year bt my dad was all “i cant let them c u lyk this” as if i cant jst stop 4 a week!

i had 2 lie 2 evry1 & say stuff lyk “oh its expensive” or “oh i hve cram skool” or whatev

they keep askin me y i nevr call or txt anymore bt i feel lyk i txt them all teh time?

it takes so much efort tho i jst cant b botherd

i think they ask my dad abt it cuz he asked me how they all wre doin wich he nevr did b4

i jst sed they wre doin fine

if ther was an emergency theyd tell so its fine

c u soon

☆☆☆

Me: akiyama san

💖: Haruka-chan! Hi! How are you?

Me: can i come over?

💖: Yes, yes, of course! Need me to pick you up?

She was already standing in front of his door. She knocked, and he opened it within seconds, a bright smile crossing his face.

“What if I said no?” he asked.

“I knew you wouldn’t,” she said and pulled him in for a kiss. He hugged her tightly and shut the door.

“I’ve missed you so much,” he said, voice cracking.

“Me too,” she responded as he rested his forehead against hers. “Do you have any scotch?” His face went blank, and he stood straight.

“Is that why you’re really here? For a drink?” he asked, emotionless. She said nothing. He sighed heavily. “Haruka-chan… You need to stop this.”

“Ugh, come on! Adults are so lame!”

“Can you please try to not have any tonight? For me?”

“Fine…”

“Good. Hungry?”

He ordered delivery, and they ate while sitting on the couch at a chaste distance, watching TV. She tried to look around throughout the room and nearby rooms without him noticing.

“What do you want, Haruka-chan?”

“Hm?”

“You’re looking for my bottles, aren’t you?”

“What? No, I just thought the place looked different, it’s been a while since I’ve been here, you know?”

“I know.” That hurt her more than she expected. She really hadn't been over since his birthday, had she lost track of how many days, no, weeks it had been since she was here last? Since she even spoke to him last? She put her food down and scooted over to him, putting her hand on his thigh.

“How about we have some fun tonight, hm?” she said into his ear. He looked at her, eyebrows furrowed. He set his food down and put his face in his hands. “Come on, it’s been a while, right? I’ve missed doing stuff with you.” She could tell he was getting weaker by the second. He was like putty in her hands. He looked over at her again and she put her lips on his. He reciprocated and gave in almost immediately. He pulled her in close and laid back, letting her lay on top of him. He bent his leg, putting his knee up for her to rub her clit against as she continued to kiss him. She was wearing a skirt, and his hand wandered up to feel the smooth cotton of her panties. She unbuckled his belt and dove her hand in, grasping his cock firmly. He unzipped his pants to give her easier access, and she stroked him just the way he liked it. His pants and boxers were lowered halfway down his thigh at some point, and she began grinding on his cock, her panties the only barrier between them. She started to take her panties off, and he stopped.

“Haruka-chan…”

“You don’t want to fuck me, sensei?” she whispered in his ear. She wanted better circumstances for her first time, but she was getting desperate.

“Oh, god,” he whispered. “I do, I really do. But that’s not what you actually want, is it?” She sat up and looked at him. “Fine, I’ll get you a bottle of something, ok?” She got off of him, and he stood, putting his boxers and pants back in place before walking to the kitchen. She tried her best to look over and strained to hear which cabinet he opened. He came back with two glasses with ice and a bottle of bourbon. “You asked for scotch earlier, is this ok?”

“It’s perfect,” she said, and he poured her a finger’s height. She downed almost all of it in one go. “More, please!” He sighed and poured another finger’s height into her glass. He sipped on his, staring into the middle distance. She giggled and dug her face into his neck. He set his glass back down.

“Haruka-chan…”

“Hm?”

“Why?”

“What?”

“Why?” He looked her dead in the eye.

“Why what?”

“You know what.”

“It makes everything easier,” she said, taking another sip.

“That’s what you tell yourself?”

“It’s true. I sleep through the night, things are more fun—”

“You haven’t been showing up to your club, you failed all but two of your exams. Didn’t you want to be a marine biologist?”

“Well, I’d fail all of them otherwise.”

“That’s not true.”

“You don’t know that.”

“I do! You have such an aptitude for education. You’re so smart, you have such a good work ethic. Your tenacity is unmatched.”

“And yet, here I am,” she said, exasperated. She took a large swig of her bourbon.

“You need to stop this.”

“Ugh, I’m managing just fine, Akiyama-san!”

“Let me help you. Please.”

“You can help me by giving me what I want.” He sighed and continued to pour until she stopped asking. That was only when she finally passed out. He felt awful. But it was better than her ignoring him.

☆☆☆

😇🩷🌸Haruka-chan🌸🩷😇: knock-knock

—

Me: I hear there's this new anime you might like, Gekkan Shoujo Nozaki-kun.

          Read

—

Me: I wonder if that patisserie has anything new. We should go there again sometime.

          Read

—

😇🩷🌸Haruka-chan🌸🩷😇: im @ ur door

—

Me: Angel, please, talk to me, I miss you.

          Read

—

Me: Haruka-chan. Please. Just send me one text.

          Read

—

😇🩷🌸Haruka-chan🌸🩷😇: open the door

—

Me: Did I do something? Are you mad at me?

          Read

August

August definitely happened. It must’ve, right? It’s still the month that comes after July, last Haruka checked. The days and nights just kinda blended together. Must be the summer heat getting to her. She was walking around Kamurocho just about every day, after all. And she always felt so thirsty. Must be from sweating during the night, it was so hot out. She wouldn’t know, since she was still sleeping through the night every night. 

Except for the night she decided to try to be sober for a day for Ojisan’s sake. It was one of the worst days she’d had in a long time. He was getting on her nerves, kept asking her question after question: “How are you feeling?” “What do you want to watch?” “What do you want for dinner?” “Do you want me to run a bath?” She just wanted him to leave her alone! And she was constantly shaky, she could hardly hold her chopsticks while eating leftovers of something he must have bought. He didn’t even ask if it was ok to spend their limited funds on it! Did he even care? Was he always this annoying? She hardly felt hungry, and he was constantly asking why. Then, when she finally managed to fall asleep, she woke up in the middle of the night, screaming. She had felt his hands on her in her sleep again, felt his body weight on her again, felt the uncomfortable hardness of the wooden floor under her again. When Ojisan went to comfort her, she just pushed him away. She still was annoyed at him for how he was acting that day, and now she hated him for wanting her to live every day like that again.

After the sun rose, she walked straight to Kamurocho and called up one of her regulars. She had a few now—she’d stand outside a bar or a club and chat with any guy entering, or hang around town and wait for a guy to approach her, then have him buy her a drink or three. She was especially lucky when she walked around in her school uniform. Some were happy to get her phone number—of course, the number to her secret phone, the phone she conveniently forgot that Akiyama-san was paying for—and she’d call them up whenever she was running dry or no one was biting. But some of her usual guys were getting impatient. 

“Come on, sweetheart, I can’t just sit around and talk while paying for all of your drinks. You’re not a hostess, you know.”

“Would you rather I be one?”

“No, it’s still cheaper to talk to you. But you don’t exactly have the skills of a hostess. I’d rather learn some of your other skills instead.”

“Weirdo. I am actually 17, you know. I’m not just in cosplay.”

“What?”

“You didn’t know? Here’s my ID.”

“Oh, fuck. Later.”

That was thinning out the guys that were pushing their luck, but also thinning out her pool of potential buyers. And then there were the guys that only doubled down.

“You didn’t know? Here’s my ID.”

“Oh, fuck. That’s hot. What will it take for you to give me a little kiss then, hm?”

Haruka was getting grossed out by these guys, guys who wanted to mess around with her while she was in her uniform, while she was still a minor—Akiyama-san was different. He didn’t think her being a minor was a perk. He said he was willing to wait until she was 18. And he never pushed her or coerced her to do anything. Really, he was too good for her sometimes.

She started running out of options. If these guys wanted to just give her a peck on the cheek or maybe fondle her a little over her shirt, it was fine, right? She wasn't the one doing anything to them. And if anyone saw, she could just yell “Groper!”, and everyone would believe her.

And, if nothing else, she still had the one man she could always rely on—Akiyama-san. She’d swing by his apartment unannounced every few days, and every time, he was just happy to even see her. 

Akiyama had given up on lecturing her, it clearly was doing nothing to help. And maybe it wasn’t actually so bad. If it was helping her sleep, he could understand that. She was having such an awful time last year when she was having nightmares, maybe it was better this way. She was even coming over to see him more often. And he had missed her so much.

She wasn’t cooking anymore? That’s fine, he can pick up food for her, let her take food home to Kiryu-san. She wanted something to drink? Well, if it was at his place, at least he knew she was safe and could keep an eye on her. And maybe she’d be satisfied enough and not get drinks on the days she wasn’t seeing him. He hoped she wasn’t and was too afraid to ask.

He didn’t bother telling Kiryu-san about any of it, it would only hurt the man, and make things seem worse than they actually were. Besides, at least she was happy while drunk. She never got mean or angry or sad. She could actually be pretty fun. She used to be fun while sober too. Before things got bad for her again. But now when she was sober she was at her worst—anxious, agitated, shaky. That didn't mean she shouldn't at least try to get sober. Maybe once school starts and she has that structure again, she might be motivated to cut back or even quit.

Haruka’s buyers slowly started asking for more. She tried finding new guys and was successful enough for a while. But few became ol’ reliables. Plenty only wanted to talk to her for the night, didn't want her number or to see her again. Others were intimidated by her tolerance—it had skyrocketed over the past few weeks. It was becoming more expensive for her to drink enough, and fewer guys were willing to pay that much.

So, she started letting them do more to her. A kiss on the neck, let their hand wander up her shirt, up her skirt. It still was over her undergarments, so it was fine.

Wasn’t Shinada-sensei expecting a baby in August? She hoped his wife had a safe labor, that the baby was healthy. She knew the baby would be loved and cherished. She hoped it would grow up living a happy and fulfilling life.

She hoped it wouldn’t grow up to be like her.

Chapter Text

Majima

“You’re not gonna like it Majima-san, I felt sick looking at it myself,” The Florist said to him, sitting back in his chair and taking a puff of his cigar. He had finally summoned Majima to Purgatory, almost two weeks after that fight with his former kyoudai. He couldn’t be bothered to wonder if the guy survived or not.

“Just show me the damn videos.”

“I’ll start you off easy,” he said, turning on the big screen in the center of his surveillance room. It showed some videos from last fall. Recordings of Haruka-chan and Aki-chan walking around Kamurocho together, just walking. A video of him grabbing her hand and suddenly running into an alley while holding a bag of crane game prizes, only for the two to just stand there and chat. 

“That’s hardly—”

“Just keep watching.” Clips here and there of them walking while holding hands, kisses on the forehead. Definitely more than a student and a teacher should be doing, but too innocent for any real penalties. A few videos of them walking up and down the iron steps on the back of the building housing Serena and Sky Finance. The two entering Sky Finance by themselves late at night. No videos from inside the place though. Easy to claim innocence on.

“I don’t think this is enough—”

“Majima-san, just keep watching. I’ll warn you when the real shit’s about to happen, alright?” 

Christmas Eve and Valentine’s Day on the roof of that same building. Their voices were hard to make out—the cameras were farther away, and the sounds of the city drowned out just about anything that the cameras could pick up—but he could tell there was something. The guy pacing back and forth, the tender touching, the gifts. He gave Haruka-chan a necklace, and then little charms for the two of them. Lame. But they looked like proper dates, and the days these dates occurred were doubly dubious. Valentine’s Day was a whole damn picnic with champagne.

“Pretty damning stuff, that’s for sure. Good finds,” Majima said.

“Well, I’ve got one more video for you. The worst offender. I’d rather not show it to you.”

“Well, now I have to see it.”

“No, you don't.”

“Is it something that’s irrefutable? Something that can’t be denied or explained away? ‘Cause I think these are already pretty solid, probably at least enough to get him fired unless he’s as charismatic as he thinks he is.”

“Oh, this is pretty much the best video you could get for what you’re looking for. Only one would be ‘better’, though I use that word liberally here.” Majima paused. He was almost scared of what the video contents could be. If this was ‘pretty much the best video’, then it must be intense, right?

“Show me.”

“Alright.” The Florist pressed some more buttons, and up came more footage. The date on the bottom corner read Friday, 14 March 2014. White Day, five months ago. Clips of them going in and out of the bowling alley, holding hands. Clips of them going in and out of Kyushu No. 1 Star, though they only ate while inside. Majima looked at The Florist.

“Really? This is—” The Florist put a hand up. On the screen, Haruka-chan was dragging the guy to the Champion District. Aki-chan’s voice came up loud and clear, the small alleyways letting the cameras pick up the sound.

‘I mean, I'll stop somewhere, but they won't give you anything. You are still in your uniform, you know.’ She suddenly stopped walking. ‘Hey, hey, I'm mostly teasing. I know a place that won't care.’ He led her down some stairs to a bar Majima didn’t even see until he opened the door in the video. There was a jump in time on the clock at the bottom corner of the screen by almost an hour. After clumsily climbing the stairs, Haruka-chan tripped over some boxes, laughing as Aki-chan dangled her by the arm after catching her. 

‘Alright young lady, night's over.’

‘Nooooooo, there's still something I wanna dooooo!’

‘Oh yeah, you dragged me over here for something else before I got distracted by alcohol. I think it'll have to wait ‘til ne—’ Haruka-chan suddenly pushed her lips on his and shoved him to the wall, and the fucking guy returned her kiss. Majima grimaced a little—was this guy taking advantage of her while drunk? Haruka-chan broke away for a moment and looked around. A view from a different camera showed her leading him deeper into the alleyway before kissing him again.

Then, with his help, she undid his belt and removed his cock from under his boxers before placing her hand on it.

“Oh my god!” Majima exclaimed, flinching.

“That’s not all,” The Florist said.

“Huh!?”

‘I wanna try something new, ok?’ she said and kneeled on the ground. Majima watched his little girl put this grown man’s cock in her mouth.

‘Oh, fuck.’

“Jesus, man,” Majima said, putting a hand up and looking away. On the screen, Haruka-chan continued to bob her head on his cock, the guy leaning his head back and moaning. The Florist let the video continue to play. Majima looked back briefly with morbid curiosity, and the guy had grabbed onto her ponytail. That innocent, girlish ponytail.

‘Where… do you… want me… to cum?’

‘Wherever you want, sensei.’

Her use of ‘sensei’ only disturbed him more. Did the guy like being called ‘sensei’? Disgusting.

‘Fuck…’ He was all but pounding his cock straight into her throat, both hands grasping her head, her loud coughs hurting Majima deep in his bones. He suddenly pulled her head away by her ponytail and came right on her face. Her cute little girlish face. She was still in her fucking uniform. ‘Oh my god.’ The fucking guy pulled out his phone and snapped a picture of her. Did he really keep shit like that on his phone? ‘Was this your plan all along?’

‘Happy White Day,’ she said, pointing at her dirtied face.

‘So vulgar, young lady.’ He fixed his pants and crouched down in front of her. He took her chin in his fingers, admiring his handy work. ‘Fuck, that's so hot.’ He pulled out a pocket tissue and started wiping her face down. ‘You know, they say this stuff's good for the skin.’ She laughed, that cute little girlish laugh. He kissed her and stood up, helping her stand too. She stumbled a little and looked down.

‘My knees are all scraped up!’

‘God, that’s hot. Proof of what you did to me. Let's get you taken care of now, ok? But not here, I don't want to push our luck of not getting caught.’

They walked away, and The Florist paused the screen on the now-empty alleyway. He swiveled in his chair to face Majima, who was frozen, just staring at the spot the two walked away from.

“I warned you—”

“Shut the fuck up.”

“Well, you’ve got your videos. I’ll let you decide what you want to do with them.”

☆☆☆

Aki-chan’s address in the school directory was out of date. It was the house that he and Hana-chan used to share. He had no idea what went down between those two and he couldn’t care less.

That fucking video was plenty, but the idea of showing it to Daigo-chan and Ichi-chan was horrifying. Even the other clips The Florist got him were either too easy to brush off or were videos he still didn’t want to show them. No way could he let them see his little girl doing any of that. He had to take matters into his own hands.

School was out for summer break, so he couldn’t just follow the guy back to his home. But he also didn’t need to go to The Florist for this, he could just cash in an old favor from an ex-yakuza. Sure, he could probably do it on the internet, but he was too old to figure any of that shit out. He had his address that same afternoon.

But what was he going to do? He knew what he wanted to do. Kill him. Stab him. Let his guts spill on the floor as he slowly bled out. He already broke his no-killing streak. But the circumstances were different. And he still had to at least try not to kill again.

Maybe he could just send some old yakuza friends to intimidate him. Make it known to him that it wasn’t a secret anymore and that it was in his best interest to stop. He wouldn't even need to tell anyone he hired the reason why, just what to do, and a little script they could ad-lib off.

He called up some old subordinates of his—the yakuza was close enough to a cult, the grooves of the brain dug by its structure and leadership. They showed up for him without asking a question. He gave them the address and the script and told them to send four or five guys.

Majima had to see it play out though—no way was he going to miss out on seeing that fucking guy get the lights beat out of him. He told the men to arrive after the sun completely set and hung around in the parking lot, gleefully waiting.

A large black van pulled into the parking lot of the apartment building. Six men piled out, some of the toughest looking motherfuckers he'd seen in a long-ass time. And more than he asked for too. How generous. The guy in the front, who looked like the leader of that little posse, started banging his fist on Aki-chan’s door. They waited. He banged on the door again. Nothing.

“Open up, Akiyama! We've got a gift for you!” the leader shouted. The door creaked open just a crack, the chain on the inside keeping the door from opening too much.

“Who the hell a—” he started to say but the leader kicked the door in, breaking the chain. All six filed in, and Majima bounded up the stairs, propping the door open with a potted plant that was on a neighbor's window to peek through.

Aki-chan was shoved to the ground, his back hitting his coffee table, the wind getting knocked out of him. He coughed, and one of the men grabbed him by the collar and stood him back up before punching him in the face and tossing him back to the ground. Another kicked him in the stomach as one more rested his foot on Aki-chan's neck, keeping him in place. He continued to cough as the leader crouched by his head.

“Akiyamaaaaa.” He waited for him to stop coughing before continuing. “Akiyama, we've got a word of warning for you. Stay away from her.”

“Huh?” he sputtered out.

“Your little girlfriend. We advise you stop that gross-ass shit you've been doing to her. A student. Makes me sick.”

“So, my punishment has finally come,” he said softly. “But I can't abandon her.” One of the men suddenly kicked him in the head.

“I don't think you understand,” the leader continued. “You very much can. And you will unless you want another visit. We won't be so kind next time.” Aki-chan scoffed.

“You henchmen are all the same. You know how many times I've heard that li—” A swift kick to his stomach cut him off. The man who had his foot on his neck stepped back as another lifted him by the shoulders, and the leader stepped aside as the remaining four took turns wailing on him. The stomach, the face, the groin. Fist hit skin until blood started splashing, and they still didn't stop. Aki-chan was barely conscious, bruised beyond recognition, blood dripping from his mouth and nose when they were finally done with him. The man who was holding him up dropped him, and he landed on the floor without resistance.

The six men filed out, Majima nodding his head as thanks to them before walking into the apartment himself, shutting the door behind him.

“I hope you got the message, Aki-chan," he said as he walked towards him. The guy just lay there, catching his breath. “I've got some little videos that could get you fired, send you to jail even. But I'm nice, I'll give you a chance to stop messing around with her of your own accord.”

“Again with these fucking videos…”

“Again?”

“Last year in, like, April, a student took some innocent pictures and videos of Haruka-chan and me. He threatened to send them to people, making bold claims and misconstruing the context to make them look way more scandalous than they actually were if she didn’t go on a date with him. Could’ve sworn Haruka-chan said he deleted those…”

“Oh, these videos are much more recent and aren’t so innocent, far from it,” he said, crouching down.

“Hm?” Majima pulled out a phone that The Florist lent him—no way was he keeping that shit on his own phone—and pointed the screen in Aki-chan’s face. He hadn’t moved at all since Majima walked in.

‘Where… do you… want me… to cum?’

‘Wherever you want, sensei.’

Aki-chan closed his eyes and sighed.

“I don’t even want to know how you got your hands on that.”

“No wiggling your way out of this one, snake,” Majima said before spitting on Aki-chan’s face. Aki-chan grimaced and slowly lifted his hand to wipe it off. “Leave Haruka-chan alone. Stop fucking her.” He added that last part in the hopes that the guy would just admit it, it would make things even simpler. That definitely was illegal. Aki-chan sighed. “Got something to say?”

“Believe it or not, we never went that far.” Majima scoffed, not willing to listen to this guy's lies. “And I’m not leaving her. I’m sure you’ve noticed how much she’s struggling right now. I’m not going to just abandon her.”

“Oh, yeah? Then why didn’t you fight back against those guys? Word on the street is you pack a mean punch. Well, kick, actually, but you get what I’m sayin’.”

“Because I deserve it. It’s my divine punishment. I’m the demon who corrupted my angel. It’s all my fault. And I have to be the one to help her and make it right.” Majima was getting real pissed off with the guy.

“Your fault, huh? What makes you say that? Choose your words carefully,” he said, pulling out his Demonfire Dagger.

Aki-chan explained his regret for letting her touch alcohol way back on their dinner date for her birthday and at other times besides. How his falling on top of her was what sent her spiraling down again. Her sleep problems because of it, because of him. How she chose alcohol to feel better instead of continuing therapy because he let her get used to the feeling of being drunk to begin with, led her to think it was ok, that it was normal.

“I’m watching her drown and it’s my fault, get it? All of it is,” he said, voice cracking. Majima wiped his face, struggling to feel any sympathy for the guy and trying to decide what to do to him. “I hardly ever get to see her or talk to her anymore. She ignores my texts then shows up here out of the blue only to ask for a drink, maybe steal a bottle of something, deluded into believing I don't notice. She’s not the girl I fell in love with anymore. God, I miss her so much.” The sorry sack started to sob, snot was even dribbling down his face. Wait, what the fuck did he just say?

“ ’Fell in love with,’ huh? Damn, you’ll really say anything to stop me from stabbin’ ya.”

“I don’t care if you don’t believe me. I know I love her. And I never got to tell her.” Majima decided to humor him for a moment. He was surprisingly curious about what else he had to say.

“What's stoppin’ ya?”

"It would be a cruelty to her. I dare not add my own shadows to the darkness she is already fighting to escape."

God, this guy and his flowery, ‘woe-is-me’ poetry speech was getting old quick. But Majima hated even more that he was starting to feel bad for the guy. Of course, he knew Haruka-chan was struggling, it was plain as day to anybody who knew her. Seeing his little girl go through that was tearing him up inside. And he was starting to think that maybe this guy genuinely cared about her and wasn't just using her for his dirty fantasies. The guy sure felt responsible and was figuring out what to do about it, at least. That was more than the guy’s father was ever capable of, who never gave a shit about what he did to the guy's mother.

Majima stood back up and asked, “Think ya got a concussion?”

“Hm? No, I'll be fine.” He tried to sit up. “Gonna call an ambulance for me if I did?” he asked. Majima said nothing and walked out, slamming the door behind him.

A little tonal whiplash, I made this the other day and wanted to share (ᗒᗜᗕ)՛̵̖ I crack myself up.

Chapter Text

Akari

AkariDances: hav any of u herd from haruka chan?

ItsMFnAzusa: not me

MaiMelody: nope

MaiMelody: hav u?

AkariDances: no i havnt

AkariDances: not since summer break started

AkariDances: shes not evn been bloging

AkariDances: u think smth hapened???

MaiMelody: i feel lik someone wood of said smth 2 us by now?

ItsMFnAzusa: her dad lyks us

ItsMFnAzusa: he probably would of found a way to tell us right?

AkariDances: i guess

AkariDances: but tht dont explain whats happening

AkariDances: shes been ignoring my txts n calls

ItsMFnAzusa: think u can reach out 2 akiyama sensei?

MaiMelody: how?

MaiMelody: also tht wood mean tellin him tht we kno he n haruka chan r together

MaiMelody: or at leest were

ItsMFnAzusa: ???

MaiMelody: she hasnt said a lot of gud things abt him in her blog lately

MaiMelody: maybe she hasnt posted anything cuz they arnt dating anymore?

AkariDances: she talked abt other stuff tho

AkariDances: lik her sleep n stuff

MaiMelody: so?

MaiMelody: maybe shes jst depressed from a break up or smth?

ItsMFnAzusa: maybe

AkariDances: :/

☆☆☆

“Akari? What brings you here?” Haruka-chan’s dad asked her when he opened the front door of his apartment. The man looked rundown and haggard, not nearly as lively as when they first met on Haruka-chan’s birthday.

“Good afternoon! I was wondering if Haruka-chan was around?”

“Oh, uh, no, sorry, she’s out right now.”

“Oh, I see. Do you know when she’ll be back?” He looked away from her before responding.

“Uh, not really, no.”

“I see. Well, whenever she does come back, can you tell her I stopped by?”

“Sure. Sorry to inconvenience you.”

“Oh, no, please, I’m the one inconveniencing you. Sorry to stop by so suddenly.”

“No, no, it’s ok.” The two awkwardly stood in silence for a few seconds, not looking at each other.

“Sawamura-san—”

“Oh, that’s not my name. It’s Kiryu. Kiryu Kazuma.”

“Huh?”

“Long story.”

“Oh, ok. Well, then, Kiryu-san, how’s Haruka-chan been doing? I’ll be honest, I stopped by because I haven’t heard from her since summer break started.” A look of just intense despair coated his face, one that almost made Akari’s bones ache.

“I don’t know. I hardly see her either.”

“What?” He looked away and sighed.

“I’m sure you noticed how she was doing in school. Uh, how do I say this? She’s not gotten better.”

“Oh.”

“Yeah.” The two stood in awkward silence again.

“Um, I’m sorry, Kiryu-san. Is there anything I can do to help?”

“I don’t know.”

“Mm.” More silence.

“Do you, uh, want to come inside?”

“No, no, that’s ok. Sorry, again, Kiryu-san,” Akari said with a wave before walking away.

“She spends a lot of time in Kamurocho,” he called to her as she reached the stairs. “You might find her there if you want to look for her.” He looked away from her again before continuing. “And maybe you can convince her to come home,” he said more quietly. Akari could only look on with sympathy.

“Ok, Kiryu-san. I’ll see what I can do.”

☆☆☆

In the afternoon sun, Kamurocho was stripped bare of the neon facade that it displayed at night. Trash was on every other street corner, hardly any buildings weren’t covered in graffiti, and 2-bit punks trying to make a name for themselves roamed everywhere. At least at night, you couldn’t see half the stuff, and what could be seen under the neon lights almost gave the city a romantic glow that the trash and graffiti enhanced. Nothing could be done about the punks. At least during the day, they weren’t as scary. It was the left-over, disgruntled yakuza that came out at night. But the men all acted the same.

Akari had no idea how Haruka-chan could spend enough time here that even her dad told her to come here to find her. She had to shut down man after man trying to hit on her, ask her if she wanted to be a hostess, whistle as she walked by. And Haruka-chan was even prettier than her, who knew how much attention she was getting.

Walking around the streets led to nothing. The city wasn’t huge, but finding one person who didn’t want to be found, and who might not even be there to begin with, was no easy task. She could be in any little seedy bar tucked away in a corner that Akari wouldn’t even be able to see, for all she knew.

AkariDances: i stopped by haruka chans place

AkariDances: her dad told me she spends alot of tim in kamurocho

AkariDances: im looking 4 her

AkariDances: can either of u come help?

ItsMFnAzusa: kamurocho??????? lik inner city soapland yakuza kamurocho???????

AkariDances: ya

MaiMelody: ur there by urself???

AkariDances: ya

ItsMFnAzusa: Σ(°□°˶) !! grl u cray cray

AkariDances: haruka chans out here by herself all the tim aparently

AkariDances: if u saw how her dad looked youd do the same

AkariDances: his name isnt sawamura btw its kiryu

ItsMFnAzusa: huh??????

MaiMelody: wat??????

AkariDances: all he said was ‘long story’ ╮(￣▽￣"")╭

ItsMFnAzusa: well whatevs well come help

Akari waited in Cafe Alps until the two arrived together.

“Sorry it took so long,” Mai-chan said.

“It’s ok, I know this was pretty last minute.”

“For real, we were just getting to the good stuff—” Azusa-chan was in the middle of saying before Mai-chan smacked her on the arm. Akari didn’t bother asking.

“Alright. I don’t really have a game plan beyond looking around, which I already did for, like, half an hour before I texted you two.”

“Maybe we could ask some people? Maybe some of them know her?”

“I don’t know about that, remember when she blogged that she would drink with homeless people? I don’t want to talk to them,” Mai-chan said.

“Damn, didn’t think you were judgmental like that,” Azusa-chan responded.

“I mean, they’re kinda scary right?” She leaned in a little closer and whispered, “What if they’re on drugs or something?”

“It’ll be pretty easy to tell.”

“Well, you can ask them, then.”

“We could check out some of the bars, maybe someone saw her?” Akari said.

“Doesn’t Akiyama-sensei own a couple of businesses around here? We could look around those too,” Mai-chan said.

“Right, yeah, Haruka-chan mentioned that! God, what were they…”

“Maybe I can help,” they suddenly heard behind them.

“Majima-sensei! Good afternoon!” Akari said, getting ready to stand and bow to him.

“Oh my god, please, spare me the fuckin’ formalities,” he said, rolling his eye. The three girls were at a loss for words.

“What’s with the get-up?” Azusa-chan asked, pointing at him. He was wearing the most peculiar thing, Akari never thought someone would wear something like it—a snakeskin suit jacket, no shirt, tight leather pants with snakeskin shoes, and, possibly most perplexingly, a baseball bat to accessorize. But somehow Majima-sensei pulled it off.

“This is my ‘going out’ outfit, got a problem?”

“N-no, of course not!” Akari interjected. Was he this scary at school? Akari never felt such intense intimidation radiating off of him.

“So, ya lookin’ for Haruka-chan?”

“Y-yes, sensei!”

“Good luck. I’ve had the hardest time finding her myself. Not about to ask The Florist for another helping hand,” he said to himself.

“Huh?”

“Forget it. I can at least give you a few places to start, I’ve heard bits and pieces of where she goes.”

“That’d be great, sensei!” Majima-sensei told the girls about eight different places: a bar called Serena, an office for a business called Sky Finance, a hostess club called Elise, a ramen joint called Kyushu No. 1 Star, the Sega arcade, the karaoke place, the Champion District (“Yeah, all of it. But there’s one bar in particular I know she’s been to,”) and the homeless encampment at West Park.

“Quite the laundry list,” Mai-chan said.

“But it's better than nothing!” Azusa-chan said.

“Should we split up and cover more ground?” Akari asked.

“I don’t wanna travel this city alone!” Mai-chan whined.

“You’ll be fine, I see youngins runnin’ round all the damn time. I can come along with ya if ya really want,” Majima-sensei offered.

“No thanks, I’ll manage,” Mai-chan said.

“Suit yourself.” Majima-sensei walked back to his table, where he was having coffee with a woman. She looked over her shoulder at them, concerned. Majima-sensei said something to her, and she returned her gaze to him. He leaned forward and gently placed his hand on hers, consoling her. A man of many faces, it would seem.

The girls split their destinations as such: Akari would go to Serena and Sky Finance, Mai-chan would go to the arcade and Elise, Azusa-chan would go to the ramen place and the karaoke place, and then the three would meet up outside the Champion District. None of them brought up West Park.

☆☆☆

All three girls ran in their respective directions, grateful for at least having a starting point.

Akari reached her destination quickly, the building was barely a block away, and she hoped it was the same for the other two. She rode the elevator up to Serena first.

“Oh, sorry, young lady, I can’t serve you,” the mama said as soon as Akari entered.

“I’m not looking for a drink, I’m looking for a girl.”

“Ok, maybe I can help. Can you describe her?”

“She’s my age, a student at Kamurocho High, usually wears her hair in a ponytail. Her name is Sawamura Haruka.” The mama’s face dropped.

“Haruka-chan?”

“You know her?”

“Know her!? She’s practically my niece! Honey, come out here!” she called to the door labeled ‘Employees Only’.

Does Haruka-chan know everyone in this god-forsaken city?

“What is it? A fight I gotta break up? Oh, Natsukawa-san? Sorry, we can’t serve you anything.”

“Nishikiyama-sensei!?”

“She’s here to ask about Haruka-chan!”

“Haruka-chan!? Have you heard from her!? Do you know anything!?”

“Uh, no, sorry, that’s why I’m here, actually. Majima-sensei told me to ask about her here.”

“Majima-no-aniki, of course! He knows her best aside from Kazuma.” 

Akari had to very quickly figure out who all these people were, how they all knew each other, how they all knew Haruka-chan, and why no one seemed to know a thing about her whereabouts.

“Oh, where are my manners? Hi, I’m Nishikiyama Reina, I run this bar, and this man is my husband.”

“Oh, pleasure to meet you! I’m Natsukawa Akari, Haruka-chan is my classmate and friend,” she said with a bow.

“And, of course, we already know each other,” Nishikiyama-sensei said. Akari nodded.

“What a small world this is!” the mama said.

“Small city,” Nishikiyama-sensei said.

“Anyway, I came here to see if Haruka-chan had been around at all or if you knew anything about where she might be, or anything at all, really,” Akari said.

“I’m sorry, Akari-chan, I’ve not seen her since—” the mama started to blush and stammered a bit. “She hasn’t stopped by here since last summer.”

“After you girls went on to be second-year students, I hardly see her at school. Her dad hasn’t been here much recently, either, now that you mention it,” Nishikiyama-sensei said.

“Why do you ask, Akari-chan?”

“Oh, uh, I just haven’t seen her lately and wanted to make sure she’s ok.”

“Must be pretty serious if you’re looking here. Do you have her number?”

“She doesn’t respond anymore. Her dad said she hangs out in the city a lot, though, so here I am.”

“Oh, dear. You don’t think it has anything to do with… a guy, do you?” the mama asked, blushing again.

“No, I don’t think so. I don’t think her boyfriend knows much, either.”

“She has a boyfriend!?” both of the Nishikiyamas shouted.

“Uh, ignore that I said that.”

“Who is he!? Does he go to your school!?” the mama asked.

“Uh, yeah, you could say that.” The mama squinted her eyes with skepticism.

“Well, anyway, neither of us know anything. Anything we can do to help?” Nishikiyama-sensei asked.

“If you could ask some of the patrons here if they know anything, that’d probably help.”

“Why would they know?” the mama asked.

“I’d rather not get into it.” The mama looked disappointed but didn’t press the issue.

“Alright, well, I’ll see what we can do, ok?” the mama said. They exchanged numbers, and Akari left. Not quite empty-handed, but certainly nowhere closer to finding her friend. She stepped outside and tried to figure out how to get to Sky Finance. She eventually worked out that she had to use the fire escape stairs at the back of the building and climbed her way up. She tentatively opened the door and peeked inside.

“Hi, is this Sky Finance?” A woman with a tight bun was sitting at a desk by the door, clacking away at her computer.

“It certainly is!” she said, putting on a pair of glasses. “What can I do for you, young lady? Looking for a loan?”

Is it even legal to give a minor a loan?

“Oh, no, I’m actually looking for a person,” Akari said, stepping in and shutting the door behind her.

“Well, we certainly get plenty of people walking through that door. Who is it?”

“A girl my age, goes to Kamurocho High, usually wears her hair in a ponytail…” As Akari described her, the woman appeared more and more… upset? Concerned? Annoyed? It was hard to tell. “Her name is Sawamura Haruka. Have you seen her?” The woman scoffed.

“And you came here to look for her?” she asked, a bit miffed.

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to bother you,” Akari said, putting her hand on the doorknob.

“Hold on, I want to know why you came here of all places to look for this girl.”

“Oh, uh, Majima-sensei told me this might be somewhere she’s been recently.”

“What’s that bastard playing at…”

“Huh?”

“You go to Kamurocho High, too, right? Same as Haruka-chan?”

“Yeah, she’s my classmate and also my friend.”

“Do you know an ‘Akiyama-sensei’ there?” Akari was certainly taken off guard by that. She looked away briefly before answering, scared she betrayed something on her face about just how important Akiyama-sensei was in all of this.

“Uh, yeah, he’s both our homeroom teacher, actually.” The woman scoffed again.

“Figures. That can’t be a coincidence.”

“O-oh? Why’s that?”

“Well, your homeroom teacher just so happens to be my ex-husband.”

“Oh, shit.” Akari shot her hand to her mouth, embarrassed that she swore in front of an adult.

“Don’t worry, that’s a normal reaction. How much do you know about those two, hm?”

“You seem to know quite a bit,” Akari said, not wanting to out the two to someone who was still practically a stranger to her.

“Well, I thought I did, once. I made some assumptions, I was acting pretty stupid about it, to be honest. You still haven’t answered my question, though.”

“Uh, well, um, I know they, uh, spend a lot of time together?”

“Hmph, sounds about right.”

“Is that… why you got divorced?”

“Getting a little personal there. I don’t even know your name.”

“Ohmygosh, sorry, my name is Natsukawa Akari!” she forced out with a bow.

“I’m Hana. The secretary here. Though I do pretty much everything else too.”

“Does Akiyama-sensei help at all?”

“Here and there. But we’re never here at the same time, that’s our arrangement. I haven’t seen his face in months. Not like he did very much to help out before we divorced anyway. The lazy bastard slept on that couch half the time. Anyway, I’m feeling generous, I’ve hardly talked to anyone who isn’t a client in a while, so I’ll answer your question. Haruka-chan’s not the reason we divorced, but she certainly was a catalyst for a lot of it. I’m not even mad at her. Shun was the fucking idiot. Well, I was, too, I suppose.” She sighed heavily, and Akari had no idea where to look or what to say. “But, no, I haven’t seen her, and I don't know where she is. Shun won’t tell you?”

“I don’t want to ask him, neither he or Haruka-chan know that I know about them.”

“And how do you know?”

“She’s got a blog. She doesn’t use names or anything, but it’s definitely her. She doesn’t know I read it, though. I just follow it to keep tabs on her and make sure she’s safe.”

“I see. Well, you’re a kind friend.” She hesitated for a moment before saying, “I know I’ll regret asking this, but… did they ever officially get together?”

“Yeah, they did.”

“I see.” Hana looked away and sighed heavily. “Good for them, I guess.”

“Sorry to have bothered you, Hana-san. I’ll get going now.”

“Alright. Hope you find her.”

☆☆☆

Akari had to spend the next several minutes parsing out what she learned over the past not-even-half-an-hour.

AkariDances: any progress?

ItsMFnAzusa: the owner of the ramen place saw her a few days ago

ItsMFnAzusa: he was pretty worried abt her

ItsMFnAzusa: no one at the karaoke place has seen her lately

MaiMelody: no one at the arcade saw her recently either

MaiMelody: apparently she was a beast at those games

MaiMelody: they all knew her name

MaiMelody: no one @ elise evr met her bt they knew her name too

MaiMelody: its one of the places akiyama sensei owns

ItsMFnAzusa: anything gud akari?

AkariDances: no one at either place has seen her in a few months

AkariDances: but they all were pretty close to her one way or another

AkariDances: got kinda weird tho

AkariDances: lets meet up @ champion district ill explain

At the west entrance, across the road from Little Asia, the three girls met up and exchanged notes. Akari shared everything she remembered from her conversations, the other two just as surprised about it all as she was.

“What is up with Haruka-chan? How does she know all these people?” Azusa-chan asked.

“Great question. Makes me wonder who her dad actually is too. He’s gotta be ex-yakuza with that giant dragon tattoo on his back, right?” Akari added.

“We can talk about it all later, can we please hurry up? I don’t want to be around here more than necessary,” Mai-chan said. The three stared into the Champion District, steeling themselves. Azusa-chan took the first step, and the other two followed suit.

“What was the name of that one place Majima-sensei told us?” Azusa-chan asked.

“Oh, man, I don’t remember! All these places have such weird names!” Mai-chan whined.

“Hey, hey, you don’t need to be scared, ok?”

“I’m not—”

“Yes, you are! You get frazzled and anxious like this when you get scared. Come here.” Azusa-chan put out her hand for Mai-chan to take. Mai-chan looked over at Akari, who pretended to read all of the signs. Mai-chan sighed and took Azusa-chan’s hand. Just as Akari looked back over, Azusa-chan snuck a quick peck on her cheek. Mai-chan didn’t argue.

The three slowly wandered down the winding alleys, taking their time to read each and every sign they came across. Nothing looked familiar.

“Majima-sensei did say that it was quite a hole in the wall. Didn’t he say it was down some stairs?” Akari asked.

“Ugh, we’ll never find it!” Mai-chan whined.

“Lost, little ladies?” They all stopped in unison. Azusa-chan sighed and turned to face the direction the voice came from. A group of wanna-be punks. Great.

“Nah, we’re good, thanks,” Azusa-chan said.

“Are you sure? You look pretty lost to me,” one of them said. He seemed to be the leader, like that actually meant anything.

“We’ll be fine. Bye!” The three started to walk off more quickly.

“Hey! Don't you know we're the Akai brothers? Come back over, we can take you somewhere better than wherever you’re looking for!”

“Actually, you might be able to help!” Akari shouted, turning back towards them.

“Akari-chan!” Mai-chan shout-whispered.

“Do you know a girl my age named Sawamura Haruka?” she asked, walking towards them.

“That stuck-up bitch?” He scoffed. “I see her here from time to time, never gives me the time of day.”

“She doesn’t know what she’s missing, boss,” one of the subordinates said. He was wearing a bandana around his mouth and nose with the pattern of a skull.

Ooh, so scary …

“When did you last see her?”

“Earlier today. The slut was walking to some bar with another guy.”

“Shut the fuck up!” Azusa-chan shouted.

“Shut up! We need this info!” Akari shout-whispered at her. “Where did they go? Who was he?” she asked him. The punk shrugged.

“I dunno, one of her hookups. I see her with a different guy every other day. They went down that little road. Think she goes to a place called Bottom Shelf.”

“That’s a shit name for a bar,” Azusa-chan said.

“Look, man, I didn’t found it, alright? You know these barkeep types, always have some bullshit personal reason.”

“Ok, thank you so much!” Akari said, getting ready to leave.

“Hey, now, what are you gonna give us in return for the information?”

“Surely having three girls even notice that you’re here is enough,” Azusa-chan said.

“Ooh, you’ve got a mouth on you. How about you put it to work on my dick, hey?” he said, grabbing his crotch over his pants, and his subordinates laughed.

“You fucking—”

“Let’s go!” Akari said, dashing and dragging Azusa-chan away, dragging Mai-chan in turn. They turned the corner and listened for any footsteps, trying to discern if they followed them. “I think we’re good,” Akari said after a while.

“Haruka-chan better be at this bar, I swear to god,” Azusa-chan said.

☆☆☆

The three returned to searching, going down the street the punks pointed at, looking for the bar Bottom Shelf. They eventually found it down some narrow steps on the street corner that was hidden by a bunch of cardboard boxes, a dark green door in a wall painted the same shade of dark green. The sign hung above it, but not the kind that sticks out from the wall so that people passing could see it. It was just a little wooden plaque bolted straight onto the brick.

“Damn, I’m amazed anyone can find this place. Do they even want to stay in business?” Azusa-chan asked.

“It’s the kind of place only people in the know know about, I guess,” Akari responded.

“What kind of bar even is it!?” Mai-chan asked.

“Let’s find out.” They walked down the stairs single file, there not being enough room to walk any other way. Akari pushed the door open, a single bell ringing. The place was dark and grimy—you wouldn’t even know it was a summer afternoon outside sitting in here. There were only a couple of functioning lights, and the room could barely fit the worn-down couch, table, and bar stools that were probably older than the bar. Two people were sitting at the bar, but neither turned to look towards the sound of the bell. It was too dark to tell who it was, but all three desperately hoped it was the two that the punks said they saw earlier.

“Don’t recognize any of you, how’d you find this place?” the barkeep asked.

“Ask the right people, get the right answers,” Azusa-chan said, voice only slightly shaky.

“Uh-huh. Well, I don’t know you, and I don’t know anyone that knows you. Scram.”

“We will in a moment,” Azusa-chan said as Akari approached the bar. As she got closer, she knew she recognized the ponytail, the charm bracelet.

“Haruka-chan?”

“Akari-chan?” Haruka-chan turned to face her, though her speech was a bit too slurred for Akari’s liking.

“What are you doing here?” Akari asked.

“What’s it look like?” she said, lifting a glass of something dark.

“Who are these girls, friends of yours?” the guy she was sitting with asked.

“Uh, yeah, they're my classmates.”

“Care to join us? The more the merrier,” he said, looking at the three with a disgustingly lewd expression.

“No, thanks. Let’s go, Haruka-chan,” Azusa-chan said, approaching her, Mai-chan following.

“Leave me alone. Why are you all here anyway?”

“Because you’ve not responded to any of my calls or texts! I was worried about you! Everyone else is too!” Akari said. Haruka-chan rolled her eyes.

“Oh my god, what is with all of you!? I’m fine, obviously!” she said, gesturing at herself. “I’d tell you if something was wrong.”

Liar! I read your blog, you don’t tell us anything!

“Come on, let’s go,” Akari said, grabbing Haruka-chan’s arm.

“Let go!” Haruka-chan said, struggling. The man she was with stood up.

“You heard her, leave her be.”

“This doesn’t concern you, pedophile!” Azusa-chan shouted.

“The term is ephebophile—”

“Like a give a fuck, you fedora-wearing freak!”

“Azusa-chan!” Haruka-chan chided.

“Get out of my bar,” the barkeep finally said, pointing at the door.

“Don’t think this means we’ve given up, Haruka-chan,” Akari said. Haruka-chan didn’t even look at her as they walked away and exited the bar.

“Well, that could’ve gone better,” Mai-chan said when they were at the top of the stairs again.

“No kidding,” Azusa-chan said.

“Let’s just go,” Akari said, staring at the ground.

“What? Why?”

“She’s not gonna change her mind. I just wanted to see her, that’s all. And I did. So let’s go.” Azusa-chan and Mai-chan looked at each other for a moment, and followed Akari away from the little street, away from the Champion District, away from Kamurocho. Away from Haruka-chan.

Chapter Text

None of Haruka’s usuals could meet up, and she had already gone to Akiyama-san’s place two nights in a row. And tomorrow was the first day back to school after summer break, she needed to be home to take care of any last-minute stuff. She needed a new outlet. She needed to find Ojisan’s stash. He had moved it at some point about a month ago, but she never needed to bother looking. She did now. The apartment was tiny, she should be able to find it, no matter how well he hid it.

Except she couldn’t find it. No matter where she looked—in the closet, all of the kitchen cabinets, on the balcony—she couldn’t find it anywhere!

Ojisan was sitting at the little table watching a scary movie, the lights out for the right atmosphere. “Haruka,” he said, “you’re not going to find any.”

“Find any what, Ojisan?” she asked while on all fours on the floor looking under the couch with a flashlight. How did so many dust bunnies get under there? Surely, she had vacuumed recently enough.

“Don’t play dumb with me. I gave all my bottles to Majima-no-nii-san.”

“What!?” She cleared her throat. “What makes you think I’m looking for them?”

“Please, Haruka, you’re not fooling anyone,” he said, rubbing his forehead. She crawled over to him and stared up at him.

“I know they’re still here, you’re lying.” No way could anyone just get rid of all their booze! 

“They’re not,” he said, staring down at her with furrowed brows, his face bathed in just the LED light of the TV. She rested her hand on his knee. He glanced down at it briefly before returning to her eyes. Yumi’s eyes.

“Come on, why are you pretending?” She slowly rubbed his knee. He took in a deep breath.

“I’m not.” Her hand wandered up his thigh.

“It doesn’t matter anyway, it’s not like I was going to drink from them or anything.”

“That’s a new low, Haruka, lying through your teeth like tha—” Her hand reached the joint of his hip. She smiled coyly.

“Why would I lie to you, hm? You’re my dear, sweet, beloved Ojisan.” She inched her knees closer to him, and her fingers caressed his torso.

“Haruka.” She inched herself even closer and lifted herself up to speak in his ear, hand resting on his shoulder as her other continued to trace his muscles.

“Do you want me to keep having nightmares?” she asked softly. “For your sleep to keep getting disrupted each and every night? For me to keep remem—” She swallowed, finding it hard to say. Ojisan stayed stone-still. Her hand on his torso lowered. “Or perhaps… you miss holding me and cuddling me under my blanket every night?” Her hand reached his crotch. Whether she was surprised or not she couldn’t be certain. But, regardless, it was exactly what she was trying to achieve. She grasped him firmly. He turned his head away from her.

“This isn’t appropriate, Haruka.”

“As if there’s ever been anything in my life that was.” She shifted her legs to straddle his thigh. She placed her hands on his chest and stared up at him. “Where are the bottles, Ojisan?” she asked softly.

“They’re not here.” She raised herself up to make her face level with his.

“Come on, Ojisan,” she said, wrapping her arms around his neck. He stared at her with the same stony expression. “Maybe you just need some more persuading.” He leaned back and tried to scoot away, but she kept her arms wrapped around his neck and simply moved with him. She kissed his neck, and he grunted.

“You—”

“You’re not fighting this as much as a little girl’s daddy is supposed to, Ojisan.” He didn’t respond, and she lowered her hand to grasp his firm cock again. He inhaled sharply. “Have you been wanting this? More than once I felt you against me after waking up in the morning.” 

“That’s not—” 

“Or is it because I remind you of my mom? I know you see her when you look at me.” He stared at her. “How many times have you told me I have her eyes, hm?” She reached for the remote and turned off the TV. Suddenly, they were completely shrouded in darkness, the entire apartment silent. “I can pretend to be Yumi for you.”

“Don’t—”

“Kazuma,” she said, lowering her pitch to sound more like how she remembered her mom sounding. His cock twitched in her hand under his pants. She found what she was looking for. “I love you, Kazuma. I know you’d do anything for me, Kazuma.” He wrapped his arm around her waist. She was almost there. She kissed his cheek, and his hold on her tightened. She ran her fingers through his hair. “I know I’d do anything for you, Kazuma.” She moved to kiss his cheek again in the dark, but this time her lips met his. Both flinched in surprise.

“Haruka—”

“No, silly, it’s Yumi.”

“Please—” She met her lips to his deliberately this time. He kept his mouth closed but didn’t push her away.

“I love you, Kazuma,” she whispered against his lips. When his mouth opened to speak again, she dove her tongue in, and he didn’t fight it. She moaned as she kissed him, and he wrapped his arms tightly around her. He leaned back onto the floor, and she followed. She ground her hips against him, against his hardened cock. It was even bigger than Akiyama-san’s. “I’ll do anything for you, Kazuma.” His breath became heavy, and he bucked his hips up against her in tandem. She reached her hand under his pants, still over his boxers, and grasped him again. He panted as she stroked him the same way she would stroke Akiyama-san, grabbing desperately at her body. “Would you do anything for me, Kazuma?”

“Yes, I— No. No, wait, stop, Haruka.” She continued to stroke him. “Haruka, stop this.” He lifted her by her shoulders, and she stopped. “There’s a loose ceiling panel in the bathroom. There’s a bottle up there.”

Men were so easy.

☆☆☆

Akiyama was bruised from the little gift Majima-san sent his way for at least a couple of weeks. And Haruka-chan had the decency to ask what happened. Three days after she first saw him, sure, but at least she asked.

But Akiyama’s hopes that Haruka-chan would want to quit drinking once school started were dashed swiftly and fiercely. She came in late every day and acted terribly sick whenever she was there. She usually missed homeroom altogether—the only time he could guarantee he’d be able to see her all but erased. He still saw her frequently—during all of the meetings he had to have with her as her homeroom teacher. It was his job and responsibility to make sure she was succeeding in school, the same for the 35 other students in Class 2-B. His track record was 97% success with them. But the final 3%, her, was all that mattered, and not just to him.

Like any other workplace, gossip spread amongst his coworkers. He heard whisperings from people about how he was a failure for not being able to help one of his students, and it wasn’t lost on any of them that she was the student that half the school somehow still believed he was messing around with.

September

Me: Angel, can we talk? Not as Akiyama-sensei and Sawamura-san.

She did eventually respond this time. After about three hours.

😇🩷🌸Haruka-chan🌸🩷😇: ok wassup?

He responded immediately.

Me: In person.

😇🩷🌸Haruka-chan🌸🩷😇: ugh fine

😇🩷🌸Haruka-chan🌸🩷😇: lets go 2 ur place (⸝⸝> ᴗ•⸝⸝)

Me: No. Meet me at the tree line after school.

😇🩷🌸Haruka-chan🌸🩷😇: wat if another student sees us back there?

😇🩷🌸Haruka-chan🌸🩷😇: half the skool stoped talking abt us

😇🩷🌸Haruka-chan🌸🩷😇: u want it all 2 happen agen?

Me: I don't care. We need to talk today, and it has to be before you slink off to wherever you go.

😇🩷🌸Haruka-chan🌸🩷😇: fine

☆☆☆

Akiyama could not let this continue. He was sick of being sad with himself about Haruka-chan’s suffering. It had already been over two months since she started down that path, and it was time he did something. Majima-san was a bit of a wake-up call, really.

Beyond doing his homeroom teacher duties, he hadn’t made any contact with Kiryu-san. He could only imagine what the man was going through seeing his daughter like this. He must be suffering worse than him.

She responded so quickly. Today was a good day, and he almost didn't want to ruin it by bringing up her drinking. To his surprise, Haruka-chan was already waiting for him. Part of him believed she wouldn't show up at all. He smiled at her warmly and was met with a frigid stare. But he was undeterred.

“Hi,” he said.

“Hey.”

“Haruka-chan, I'm not taking no for an answer. I'm going to help you.” She rolled her eyes.

“Ugh, this shit again?”

“Yes, again. Because I'm not abandoning you. I said I'd stay by your side, and I meant it.” Sure, the context was different—he said it when they were walking to school together the day after he first crashed at her place, and he offered to hang back so no one would talk. But even then, deep down, he meant it like this too.

“Man, this is so dumb, I'm going.” She started to walk off, but Akiyama grabbed her by the forearm. Her bracelet slipped down her arm, and the charms on it dangled onto his fingers. All nine of them.

“No, you're not.” She started to struggle.

“Let go of me!”

“Just let me say my piece.”

“Fine.”

“Why did you stop going to therapy?”

“Because I don't need it anymore.”

“But why did you decide that to begin with?”

“Oh my god, stop interrogating me!”

“Just answer the question.” He still hadn't let her arm go. He knew she would try to dodge these questions—she had done so the previous couple of times he dared bother trying. But he had the courage today, he had to keep her in place.

“Because I couldn't wait weeks to maybe start getting better again, ok!?” she exclaimed.

“Weeks?”

“I went two weeks without sleep, and Makimura-sensei said she was going to get me in touch with a psychiatrist. It was going to take days for them to even call me, and then weeks to find a medicine that actually worked. I wasn't about to go for weeks without sleep again because of those nightmares. I couldn't go through all that again.” Her voice started to crack.

“Oh, angel. I understand, I do. But you'd probably be on a medication that was working by now if you just powered through—”

“I COULDN'T! I'm so weak, I didn't have the strength to just ‘power through’.” She started to struggle again. He still didn’t let her forearm go.

“You do angel, I know you do—”

"Stop calling me that!” she shouted. She looked up at him, and her face turned remorseful after seeing the hurt in his eyes. She looked away and sighed. “Besides, even if I somehow did manage to wait that long, no way could we afford it. Therapy was already ¥4,000 a session, and medicine isn’t exactly cheap either, plus all the appointments to even try all the different medicines. Insurance only covers so much. It’s easier just to drink every day instead.” He sighed, face falling at her admittance to drinking daily. A small part of him had still hoped that she never got to that point.

“Haruka-chan… Why didn’t you tell me that? You know I’d be more than happy to pay for—”

“No, I can’t ask you to do that for me, alright?”

“How many times do I have to tell you that my paying for things for you isn't an issue for me?”

“Well, it’s an issue for me! It just doesn’t feel right… my boyfriend of not even a year buying me pills for me to pop to feel better?”

“And buying alcohol for you to feel better is different?”

“I’ve never asked you to buy me any—”

“You did in Sotenbori. Or did you conveniently forget that? And I still give you some whenever you deign to bless me with your presence at my apartment. How do you afford it, anyway? Alcohol isn’t cheap, and buying some every day—”

“I don’t buy it, I don’t look over 20. People are more than happy to just give it to me.”

“People? What people?”

“None of your concern—”

“Oh, it very much is, young lady. You think I’m gonna hear that my girlfriend is running around with people I don’t know to get alcohol and not care about it? What are you doing to get these drinks from them anyway?” A lump built in his throat, and he involuntarily tightened his grip on her forearm.

Please, don’t be what I think it is.

“I just have to talk to them, ok? I show up in my uniform, bat my eyes, compliment them, and they buy me whatever I want. I stop before I do anything stupid.” Akiyama wasn’t exactly thrilled to hear her say that, but at least she wasn’t doing anything else.

“Well, you’re stopping this right now. I’m going to start paying for your therapy and medicine, I’m not giving you even a drop when you show up at my place, and you are going to stop talking to these people.”

“That’s not gonna happen.”

“Haruka-chan, I swear to god if you don’t let me do this for you—”

“Then what!? What are you gonna do!? Break things off!? You sure know how to, you did plenty of times last year—”

“That’s uncalled for, young lady, you know things were different—”

“Well, are you!?”

“Never. Not in this lifetime or any other.”

“Bold words for someone who got a divorce last year.” Stunned, Akiyama finally released her from his grip. “Am I free to go now?” He couldn't say a word. She took his silence as permission and started walking away.

“Haruka-chan!” She stopped. He didn't want her to leave, couldn't let her go wherever she was going to go. She didn't turn back to look at him. “I… I…” He wanted to say it, to finally tell her. But that wouldn't do her any good now.

“You what?” She finally looked at him.

“I miss you,” he opted for instead. A sad look crossed her face, but she still turned back around and kept walking away from him. He walked to a tree and punched it with all his might. “FUCK!”

☆☆☆

Mayflower’s blog:

Entry #31

ben a while huh?

i dont evn remember teh last time i posted on here

man i dont wanna be an adult there so lame!

they keep asking me things, telling me wat 2 do, acting like they kno wats best 4 me

A made me meet him by teh trees @ SKOOL 2 talk abt my drinking as if ppl wont see & start talking again

they slowed down after summer break, i rly dont want them 2 start up agen

he said he didnt evn care! asshole!

he wasnt teh one getting notes in his locker & grafiti on his desk evry morning

it was all cuz of him 2 begin with!

then he acts all hi & mitey lyk “im gonna pay 4 all ur apointments” ugh hes always dangling teh fact tht he has money & i dont over my head

rly makes me hate him sumtimes

he evn smokes cigarettes!! isnt tht supposed 2 b worse then alcohol????? fucking hypocrite

i rly wanted 2 tell him off but he looked so happy 2 c me

im so lame & so weak

c u soon

Chapter Text

During his trips to New York City, Akiyama discovered a lot of music and even purchased some records. He popped on one of those records, The Queen is Dead by The Smiths, and drowned his sorrows with booze in his recliner. He didn’t let himself acknowledge that at times he was no better than Haruka-chan regarding booze. He was staring at the ceiling, TV turned on but muted—the apartment felt less lonely that way.

The upbeat, boppy end of 'Frankly, Mr. Shankly ’ played as he rubbed his hand through his hair and on his face.

‘You are a flatulent pain in the ass
I do not mean to be so rude
Still, I must speak frankly, Mr. Shankly
Oh, give us your money!’

As his hand moved down his neck, his fingers hit the chain of his pendant. He fiddled with it for a moment, lightly pinching it and lazily dragging his fingers up and down the chain. Then the melancholic crooning and lonely guitar of the next song played, ‘ I Know It’s Over’. He always felt that the songs on the album could’ve been ordered better.

‘Oh, mother, I can feel the soil falling over my head’

His fingers hit the bottom of the valley of the chain, where his pendant hung. His pendant, and the Sagittarius charm. 

‘And as I climb into an empty bed’

He grasped the charm in his palm and brought it up to look at, dropping it to let it dangle from the chain hooked on his thumb. 

‘Oh well, enough said’

He stared at it, emotionless, remembering the day he clasped the charm by his heart, clasped her charm by her pulse. 

‘I know it’s over, still I cling. I don’t know where else I can go’

An involuntary sob escaped his throat, and he grasped the charm in his palm again and brought his clenched fist to his face, just resting it there as he cried without restraint.

‘Oh, mother, I can feel the soil falling over my head’

His phone chimed on his coffee table. That beautiful sound of windchimes only for her that he set almost a whole year ago. He couldn’t bear to look at it, so he left it alone. It chimed again. 

‘Do you think you can help me?’

And again. 

‘Sad veiled bride, please be happy’

He listened to the sound of her, of what she meant to him, of who she once was, and only sobbed harder. 

‘Handsome groom, give her room’

He tugged a little on the chain, feeling like he was suffocating from it, from her, from who she had become.

‘Loud, loutish lover, treat her kindly’

His phone started to ring. 

‘Though she needs you more than she loves you’

The ringing eventually stopped, only to immediately start again. 

‘I know it’s over, and it never really began. But in my heart, it was so real’

And again.

‘Why are you on your own tonight?’

And again.

‘Why do you sleep alone tonight?’

Loud banging at his front door. 

‘I know. ‘Cause tonight is just like any other night’

He sighed, kicked his legs down to bring his recliner upright, and leaned forward with his face in his hands, trying to muster the energy to walk all the way to his front door. 

‘That’s why you're on your own tonight’

The banging on his door grew louder and faster. After the gift Majima-san sent him a few weeks prior, he didn’t need his neighbors thinking he was in trouble with the yakuza. 

‘It’s so easy to laugh, it’s so easy to hate. It takes strength to be gentle and kind’

He groaned, stood, and strode to the door, yanking it open, the chain never having been replaced since his door got kicked in.

“What!?” he yelled. Haruka-chan’s fist was still poised to continue pounding on the door, and it took her a moment to look up at him. When she did, shock crossed her face.

‘It’s so easy to laugh, it’s so easy to hate. It takes guts to be gentle and kind’

“Akiyama-san…” His face must’ve been red and puffy from crying just a few seconds before. He didn’t care. No, it was good actually. Let her finally fucking see what she was doing to him.

‘Love is natural and real’

“What do you want?” he asked, not quite as loud, but just as belligerent.

‘But not for you, my love’

“You know what I want.”

‘Not tonight, my love’

“To take advantage of me, my lo— my kindness? No, it’s not kindness. I’m just slowly killing you.” She stared at him blankly. “What, I gotta spell it out for you, again, like always? I can’t do this anymore, I’m fucking done with this shit!”

‘Love is natural and real’

“Akiyama-san, come on, you don’t mean that,” she said, staring at him with sympathy. This certainly wasn’t the first time he tried to resist, only to give in to her honeyed words, her attention, and, when she was desperate enough, her begging.

“I do.”

‘But not for such as you and I, my love’

“No, you don’t. Come on now, let’s go inside, yeah?” she said, talking to him like a mother to a child having a tantrum. She started to step forward, to move around him, but he stepped over to block her way. He stood squarely in the door frame, not giving her an inch to move within. “Akiyama-san, come on, let me in,” she said a little more forcefully.

“No.”

‘Oh, mother, I can feel the soil falling over my head’

“Ugh, I don’t feel like going through this whole routine right now, ok? Let me in.” He didn’t move. He just stared down at her with contempt. “Akiyama-san,” she said again, changing her tone as she shifted strategies. She stepped up to him and put a hand on his chest, staring up at him with those beautiful brown eyes. She knew the effect her soft gaze had on him. When he didn’t respond, her other hand started to caress his arm, his torso, and slowly shifted it up to his neck, his face. She cupped his cheek with her hand and gently rubbed his cheek with her thumb, his puffy eyes sensitive to the touch. He so desperately wanted to raise his hand to meet hers, hold it, kiss her palm, like last year when she walked him back to her apartment after he lost track of time in the park, when they held hands for the first time. She removed her hand and lowered it to his crotch, grasping at him over his pants. He was completely flaccid. Annoyance crossed her face.

‘Oh, mother, I can feel the soil falling over my head’

“It’s not going to work this time, Haruka-chan.” She looked away from him.

“Please.”

“No.”

“Please!”

“No!” She started to hit his chest with her fist.

“Come on, please!” He just stood there and took it. Her hands hit him harder. It didn’t hurt, she was nowhere near as strong as him. He hadn’t let her get this far very often. Watching her beg and plead was so painful. “Please, please!” She sank to her knees, grasping at his hips and legs. “Come on! Please! I just need a little, ok!? I won’t have more than one drink, alright!?”

‘Oh, mother, I can feel the soil falling over my head’

“No, Haruka-chan. I know you.”

“No! You don’t! I can manage, ok!? I can have just one, I promise!” She pounded her fist against his thigh, angry tears rolling down her face. He was so close to breaking. It hurt so much to watch her do this and not do anything about it. He so desperately wanted to kneel down on the ground with her, hold her close, and let her inside.

‘Oh, mother, I can feel the soil falling over my head’

“No, you can’t.”

“Fine!” she shouted, yanked her bracelet off of her wrist, and threw it at him. The chain snapped, and the charms went flying. He stared at the little Gemini charm that landed at his feet. He couldn’t bear to look at her. He heard her shuffling some more and saw her garnet necklace land at his feet too. At least she was able to remove it without breaking its chain. The next song on the record started, ‘Never Had No One Ever’. He looked away, staring at a streetlamp far away from them. She stayed in front of him, breathing heavily.

‘When you walk without ease on these streets where you were raised’

“Are you done?”

“Fuck you!” she yelled and ran off to god knows where. He could only continue to stare at that streetlamp. Her footsteps echoed as she dashed down that street, a dog barked, a car passed by, the record played in his apartment.

‘I had a really bad dream, it lasted twenty years,’

It felt like he never once knew peace in his life.

He crouched down and carefully picked up the necklace at his feet. He stared at the deep red of the garnet, red like the passion and love he felt for her, red like that fire that burned in her, red like the string of fate that linked their pinkies together.

‘I know that I never, ever, had no one ever’

He scanned the floor around him for the nine charms that flew off of her bracelet, remembering what each charm meant to her.

“This one was from Taichi… that one’s from Shiro… oh, there’s Izumi’s…”

‘I'm alone, I'm alone, I'm alone, I'm alone, I'm alone’

When he only found six, he walked down the stairs and searched on the gravel-laden ground. He found two more, and dug in the bushes next to him, where he found the final one.

The record was done by the time he found them all and returned to his apartment. In the silence, he found a small box to keep the charms in and placed it on his coffee table. He sat on the floor, staring at them. He was so happy when she talked to him about each of the orphans that gave her each charm so many months ago. He probably loved her even then, he realized.

And he still loved her. And that might have been the worst part of all.

☆☆☆

Haruka ran as far and as fast as she could towards Kamurocho. She had no money on her, completely believing that Akiyama-san would let her in, let her stay. No way could she get a taxi. She took out her secret phone and started going down the list of men she had in her contacts.

Me: want 2 have sum fun 2nite?

51, restaurant owner: not tonite sorry

-

32, salaryman: I’ll be at work for a few hours still.

-

46, banker: The missus is home, can’t.

Really!? No one was biting!? She continued to text them until someone finally agreed.

Me: im a bit far from showa st

Me: can u pick me up?

28, programmer: That’ll cost extra ;)

Me: so is tht a yes?

A few minutes later, a black car that was one of those luxury brands Haruka couldn’t be bothered to remember pulled up beside her. The man (was it 'Sukamo'? 'Tsumiko'? 'Tsukumo'?) rolled down his window and gave her a sly smile, thin-rimmed glasses not at all hiding his leering. She could never remember any of the guys’ names and just used pet names with them instead. They always seemed to like it. Some liked “senpai”, others liked “sir”. This guy was one of the weirder ones though.

“Onii-chan! Thanks for picking me up!” She gave him a coy smile as she opened the door and crawled onto the passenger seat.

“Of course, baby, anything for you. I’ve missed you,” he said, patting her head.

“Onii-chan, you’re so silly!” she said, playfully pushing his hand away.

“Aw, come on now, babe, that’s no way to greet your beloved big brother,” he said, leaning over to wrap an arm around her shoulder and kissing her forehead. His long black unkempt hair was in a ponytail, but there were still some loose strands that tickled her face. She could almost feel the oil of his unwashed hair. She giggled, hoping that would satisfy him. It did, for now.

“Come on, onii-chan, let’s go!” she said, bouncing in her seat. He chuckled.

“You’re so cute, I’d do anything for you.” He drove her farther into Kamurocho, and Haruka never once let him rest his hand on her thigh—she never let any of the guys do that. That was still a precious thing she only wanted Akiyama-san to do.  

After parking in one of the underground garages in the heart of Kamurocho, he turned to her and asked, “What’s your desired elixir tonight, my dear?” His attempt at humor made her want to gag. Akiyama-san’s natural charisma let him get away with saying things like that. This guy was not blessed with such suavity. She put a finger to her chin and exaggeratedly cocked her head and eyebrows in thought.

“Hmmm. I haven’t had brandy in a while!”

“Brandy, huh? That’ll cost extra, you know,” he said with a grin and a wink.

“Fine then, you pick, onii-chan!” she whined. Anything to play into the precocious little sister role and get her drink already! He just chuckled again.

“I’ll see what’s in stock.” He got out of the car and walked off to go buy something, locking the car doors behind him. As she waited inside, Haruka recalled the fight she just had with Akiyama-san. He never denied her like that before. She always won. She pulled out her phone, glancing at her now bare wrist

Me: knock-knock

Me: hey im here

Me: r u home?

Me: open the door!

Me: i hear ur depressing ass music, come open the dam door! 

↖ Unanswered call

↖ Unanswered call

↖ Unanswered call

↖ Unanswered call

— Now —

Me: im sorry

As she waited for a response, she looked around at the interior of the car. It was newer than Akiyama-san’s, by a long shot. The interior had that black plush fabric, and there wasn’t any trash in the back. There really wasn’t anything interesting at all inside the car. The doors clicked as the man unlocked them, approaching the car with a shopping bag in hand. She took in a deep breath and got up on her knees on the seat.

“Onii-chan! What took you so long?”

“Sorry baby, there was a bit of a line,” he said, climbing into the car and passing her the bag.

“Yay! Thank you, onii-chan!” she said, opening the bag. He got her brandy, after all.

“Where do you want to go? West Park? One of the other parks? My place?”

“You’re so silly, onii-chan! Let’s go to Public Park 3, I don’t want to disturb the homeless guys.”

“Let’s walk there, then.” He climbed back out and opened the door for her. After she stepped out, he gave her a smack on the ass.

“Owie! Onii-chan, that hurt!”

“Sorry baby, couldn’t help myself.”

As they walked to Public Park 3, he tried to take her hand or wrap his arm around her shoulder, but she playfully pushed him away. When they arrived, they sat on one of the benches, and he opened the brandy bottle.

“Ladies first,” he said, passing the bottle to her. She took it gladly and gulped down a large swig. It was cheap stuff that burned and tasted more like permanent markers than anything else, but that stuff was usually the most effective. She wiped her mouth and passed the bottle to him. He stared at her as he drank from it. “That was an indirect kiss.”

'Want a direct one instead?' Akiyama-san had asked her while they were at the karaoke booth. That was already a whole year ago. He still hadn’t responded to her apology.

“Onii-chan, don’t be gross!” she said instead. He gave the bottle back to her with a smile and watched her nervously drink some more from it. As they passed the bottle back and forth, he inched closer and closer to her. She tried to inch away, but she was running out of bench space, fast. At some point, after he passed her the bottle, he rested his arm on the back of the bench, hand on her opposite shoulder. Harmless enough. She took a small sip and gave him back the bottle.

“Hey now, that was hardly any! Have some more, babe,” he said, pushing the bottle back to her. She complied, and his hand wandered down onto her chest. She gulped down some more and passed the bottle back to him.

“That better?”

“Mmmm, better. The rest of the bottle is yours, babe.”

“Really? Thank you, onii-chan!”

“It’ll cost extra, though.” She puffed out her cheeks.

“Meanie!”

“Let’s see,” he said, tabulating on his fingers. “Picking you up, buying you brandy, letting you keep the bottle. That’s quite a tab you’ve got there, baby girl.” She laughed nervously, having already known where this was going for a while. She mentally steeled herself. As long as she knew it was coming, she usually didn’t have any flashbacks. He leaned in, put his lips to her neck, and rubbed his hand on her shirt, cupping her breast. She played along a little, giving the slightest of moans. He growled against her neck, and his hand found its way under her shirt, caressing her torso and finding her breasts again. He bit her ear a little, and she moaned a little more for him.

“Onii-chan…” He swore under his breath, and his hand reached the top of her pants. She started to scoot away.

“Guess you don’t want that bottle after all.” She stopped, sighed, and shifted back over to him. He kept his hand over her pants, but he still rubbed the joint of her hip before kissing her cheek.

“Onii-chan!”

“What, don’t want a friendly kiss from your big brother?” He stroked her hair. She missed when Akiyama-san would stroke her hair. “Come on, babe, I think you know what I want.” She sighed again. This wasn’t cheating, of course. No, she didn't feel anything towards this man, or any of the men in her contacts. Not like she did with Akiyama-san. And she was just doing it to survive, something he clearly didn't care enough to do for her anymore. Jerk.

She turned her face towards the man again. He pressed his lips to hers, and she floated away, flying above Kamurocho. She drifted around the Millennium Tower, over the Sega arcade, through West Park, above the karaoke place. She reached the building that housed Serena and Sky Finance. She felt suffocated staring at it. Her mind suddenly flew back to her body, and her back was pressed down onto the park bench, the man fully on top of her, his hand under her shirt, under her bra, his lips firmly planted on hers. She tried to fly again, to go back above the city. Her breathing got faster and shallower. She tried to hit his shoulders with her fists, but he didn’t stop. Was she really so weak that both men felt nothing when she hit them?

She tried to shout, to tell him to get off of her, but he didn’t give her the opportunity as he continued to kiss her. His hand started to wander up her skirt when his body weight was suddenly lifted from her.

“Get off her!” a familiar voice yelled. She didn’t dare open her eyes to see who found her in this humiliating situation.

“Dude, what the fuck!?” the man who was no longer on top of her yelled back. She turned onto her side, facing the back of the park bench, and curled in on herself, shielding herself.

“Get out of here before I call the cops! You know she’s underage, right!?”

“Shit,” he said before his frantic footsteps carried him away from her.

“Haruka-chan…”

Oh god, did he know it was me the whole time?

She stayed lying on the bench and squeezed her eyes shut. Maybe if she didn’t look at him, he’ll leave her alone. He walked towards her.

“Haruka-chan,” he said again, standing next to her. She couldn’t hide from him forever. She shifted and sat up, but didn’t dare look at his face.

“Date-san.”

“Are you ok? Do you want me to call the cops?”

“No, it’s fine. I’m fine.” She waited a few moments longer. “Thank you,” she said meekly. Date-san crouched in front of her, making his face more level with hers.

“Kiryu-san made it my responsibility to watch over you years ago. I know I don’t do a great job, usually, but that doesn’t mean I’ve forgotten his wishes.” 

Ojisan. 

She almost never saw him. Even during summer, she was rarely home. She cringed at the memory of what she did one of the few times she was home, coming onto him to make him tell her where his stash was. She saw Akiyama-san more than she saw him. Out all afternoon after school, well into the night, stumbling into the apartment and walking right past him to go to bed. He always stayed up until she was home. And in the morning he always had breakfast ready for her, a packed lunch ready for her, despite his still mediocre skills in the kitchen. The more she thought about everything he was silently doing for her, the larger the lump in her throat grew. She dug her face in her hands, not wanting Date-san to also see her cry after everything else he just witnessed.

“Let’s get you home.”

☆☆☆

The drive to her apartment was silent. Date-san didn’t even try to make small talk. Haruka checked her phone again.

Me: im sorry

          Read

I guess that’s fair.

He pulled into the small parking lot and walked her up to her front door, knocking on it for her. Ojisan opened it barely a few seconds later.

“Date-san?” His gaze moved to Haruka, and he gasped. “Haruka? What's wrong, what happened!?” She could only guess how her face looked.

“Found her in Kamurocho. Decided to bring her home.” Haruka was beyond grateful that he didn’t say anything else.

“Thank you, Date-san. Haruka, come inside.”

“Good night, Kiryu-san, Haruka-chan,” he said, and walked back to his car without another word. Haruka hadn’t looked at Ojisan the entire time and slowly walked inside, took her shoes off, and padded over to the bedroom.

“Haruka.” She stopped in place in front of the bedroom door. After he didn’t say anything else, she finally looked at him. His brows were furrowed, trying to look like the strong, disciplining father almost everyone believed him to be. But Haruka could easily tell he was forcing his face into that stony expression.

“Ojisan.” Her breath caught, and her mouth pulled into an involuntary frown. He strode over to her and pulled her in for a hug. Her shoulders started to shake, and she grasped onto him tightly. “I’m sorry, Ojisan. I’m sorry.” He didn’t say anything, just held her tighter.

As she lay on her futon, she, for the first time, was willing and sober enough to consider what she was doing. What she was actually doing. Oh god, she wasn’t managing at all, was she? Sleeping through the night was good, but for what? Spending the next day hunting down booze, letting herself get used by strange men so she could sleep again? Being able to sleep didn’t matter if she didn't spend the day doing anything else. The sleep was just an excuse, wasn’t it? She turned on her side and stared at the divider in their bedroom, where Ojisan was sleeping on the other side. She regretted hurting him so much. Him, her friends, Majima-san. Akiyama-san. She regretted letting things get to this point, for refusing to realize what she was doing.

But what she regretted most was leaving the bottle of brandy at the park.

☆☆☆

Haruka was sober by the time she fell asleep. And the nightmares came back again. She always proved herself right. And it was fucking annoying.

Once morning finally arrived, she realized she never got her necklace or bracelet back. What could she possibly do? Go back to him after how she acted the night before? Throwing a tantrum like a child? Maybe she could just text him and ask for it back. But he never responded to her text last night. She could only hope he held onto them instead of throwing them in the trash along with her.

Chapter Text

Mayflower’s blog:

Entry #38

had a p bad fite wit A teh other day

now its my turn 2 nevr get a response 2 my txts

i havent seen him since teh fite

i nevr make it 2 homeroom anymore

i feel awful

i was puting him thru so much

this is teh worst.

& still all i can think abt is getting another drink

i still get awful notes in my locker & insults written on my desk & ppl throwing things @ me

y do i evn bother going 2 skool

☆☆☆

Mayflower’s blog:

Entry #39

skipped skool 2day

nevr done tht b4

i jst couldnt pull myself out bed

no idea how i managed 2 go evry day hungover

my dad didnt evn say anything abt it

☆☆☆

Mayflower’s blog:

Entry #42

didnt go 2 skool all week

A had 2 call my dad abt it

he is my homeroom teach after all

dad jst sed i was sick & would b back soon

idk if i will

☆☆☆

Before their fight, Haruka-chan had started acting fine and jovial enough during the day at school again, though she probably was sneaking sips of something throughout. She even fell down the stairs once and just laughed it off.

But when she didn’t come to school for a whole week, Akiyama didn’t know what to do with himself. Calling Kiryu-san could only do so much, the man was much too gentle with his daughter to force her to come to school. Not like he himself was much better at handling her. But this was different.

Me: Angel, please come to school. You need to, and not just for my sake.

          Read

Every school day, Akiyama would carry her necklace and bracelet that he mended in his pocket, hoping and praying she would come to him asking for them back. He still hadn’t even seen her since that fight when she threw them at him. At first, he just stored them in his bedside table drawer next to his wedding band during the night. But keeping those items together didn’t sit right with him, and he kept them next to his bedside lamp instead.

When he showered, he would see the shampoo he bought her, that cherry blossom smell that suited her so well. He would open the cap and smell it every night, it being one of the few tangible things of her he had left.

October

Haruka still didn't show up to school. She continued to drink every night, though she didn’t go out to drink as often. She didn’t have the strength to go out as much as she did before. Instead, she just had her men buy her bottles she could take home instead of sneaking around at a park or shady bar. The bottles usually lasted her a couple of days.

She still had to do favors for them, and it often meant that she was too sober not to care what they were doing to her. Instead, she would drift away above Kamurocho, or Okinawa, or Sunflower orphanage, or some remote ryokan in the snowy mountains of Hokkaido. Far, far away from whatever was happening to her. And it still wasn’t cheating. This was different. She wouldn’t care if any of these men keeled over and died, didn’t know their names, their birthdays, and she certainly never let them get anywhere close to fucking her. That was saved for Akiyama-san. If they ever saw each other again.

☆☆☆

Mayflower’s blog:

Entry #46

skipped skool 4 another week

i think i missed sports day

doesnt matter anyway

it takes so much energy

i barely hav enuff energy 2 go out & get my stuff evry few days

its jst so hard

☆☆☆

Mayflower’s blog:

Entry #47

im such a failure

i keep feeling this heaviness in my chest tht keeps me from gettin up 2 do anything

i dont think ive washed my hair in 2 weeks bt im not sure

the sun taunts me

i dont deserve 2 b here

no one deserves 2 b around me

☆☆☆

Haruka only ever left her room, or even her futon, for two things: to use the bathroom or meet up with one of her buyers. Ojisan would bring her food in the morning before work, check on her when he came home, give her some more food at dinner time, and check on her one last time before going to bed himself.

She spent most of her time on her phone, hopping from website to website, barely engaging with anything. Watching a show became a chore, she’d just put on an eight-hour-long compilation of some Let’s Player and zone out. Listening to music became a chore, she’d just open a ten-hour compilation of sounds of rain and crackling fire in the background and zone out.

Sometimes she would come across a community on some social media site filled with people like her. People who kept drinking or smoking or whatever even though they knew it was wrong. People who went out and did “favors” for others just to get their next fix or to feel something. People who believed they didn’t deserve to live. But so many people had it worse than her, she didn’t deserve to feel bad. At least she had a caring father and a roof over her head. And the people that had it better than her were allowed to feel bad too or maybe were lying to themselves about how bad they had it. She was the one that wasn’t allowed to feel bad about herself.

☆☆☆

Mayflower’s blog:

Entry #50

y am i even here?

y am i even alive?

whats the point of any of this at all?

its all so absurd

i feel empty

i feel nothing

nothing matters

were all jst meaningless specks of dust in the cosmos

were here for jst a small blip of time & then gone 4 eternity

i hate this

all i can think abt is drinking & how ashamed i am 4 drinking

☆☆☆

Mayflower’s blog:

Entry #51

got one of my dads razor blades

i can finally feel smth

ive got plenty of firstaid experence after basically raising 8 kids so ill b fine

☆☆☆

Mayflower’s blog:

Entry #52

teh lil drops of blood r so interesting

each slice has a difrent lil pattern

sum look lyk tall skinny pine trees

sum look like lil tiger stripes

have 2 b better abt hiding it tho

dad saw my bandages on my rists & interogated me abt it

☆☆☆

Mayflower’s blog:

Entry #53

rists r so last week

my upper arm & thighs r much more hidden

plus less risk of cutting 2 deep

tht means im not doing 2 bad rite?

im not trying 2 die

☆☆☆

Mayflower’s blog:

Entry #55

ive not seen A in a month i think

not since our fite

i think i missed the culture festival @ skool

tht was such a special day 4 us last year

he txts me but wat am i supposed 2 say?

better i just ignore him

he deserves sum one better then me anyway

sum one who will love him

sum one who wont take advantage of him

sum one he doesnt need 2 worry abt

Majima

“Majima-san, do you remember what I told you when you asked me to find evidence of Akiyama and Haruka?” The Florist asked. He had summoned Majima to Purgatory, and Majima hadn't the slightest idea why.

“What, about Makimura-san?”

“So, you do remember. Strange, with how you’ve been acting, I was certain it had completely slipped your mind.”

“I just chose to ignore it.”

“Uh-huh. Majima-san, surely you’re aware of how little I am willing to do for free, and warning you was one of those few things. And yet, here we are.”

“Ya gonna tell me why I shouldn’t be around her?”

“All I can say is it concerns people and organizations much larger and farther beyond you.”

“Well, guess what, fuckface, I went through a lot for her back in ‘88 with plenty of people and organizations whatever the fuck you said. And I’d do it all again. And I will.” The Florist sighed.

“This isn’t going how I wanted it to.”

“And it never will. This conversation has only made me want to listen to you even less.” The Florist sighed again. “Who are these people anyway? What do they want with her? Don’t tell me she’s inherited some other bullshit everyone wants.”

“No, not quite. It’s she herself that they’re after.”

“What!? Why!?”

“That’ll cost you—”

“Name your price!”

“Don’t tell me you’ve grown this fond of her, Majima-san. Or maybe, you never really stopped.” Majima paused.

“What of it?”

“Don’t think I don’t know how bad things were for you after that whole ordeal.”

“Like I give a shit. My feelings don’t matter as much as… as…”

As hers.

“Well, either way, this is my final word of warning, Majima-san. Stay away from her.”

“No.”

“Fine.”

“I asked you to name your price.”

“For more information?”

“Yeah.”

“I don’t have any tasks I need from you.”

“Then how much money will it take?”

“More than you have.”

“I have resources.” The Florist sighed once more.

“¥100 million.”

“Deal. I’ll get it to you.”

☆☆☆

“Majima-san? Why are you calling me?” Aki-chan asked. “Decided to do something about me at last?”

Majima’s eyebrow twitched. After sending those thugs to Aki-chan’s apartment a couple of months prior, he hadn’t done anything else. After that conversation they had while he was lying bloody on the floor, when he said he had fallen in love with her and wouldn’t abandon her…

He’s nothing like his bastard father.

He still didn’t approve of it, necessarily. But he had to pick his battles. And if Aki-chan was a net positive in Haruka-chan’s life while she was struggling so much, he had to let her hold onto it. He still kept his eye out on those two whenever he could, just in case he fucks up.

“I need a loan,” Majima told him through the phone.

“How much?”

“¥100 million. As soon as possible.”

“Quite a sum. You familiar with how I run my business?”

“Yeah.”

“Alright, give me a day to come up with your test. Stop by Sky Finance tomorrow at 7 pm.” At least Majima knew the test wasn’t going to be as malicious or underhanded as the tasks The Florist asked him to do.

☆☆☆

“So, what'll it be?” Majima-san asked. He and Akiyama were in Sky Finance, sitting across from each other on opposite couches, a little table between them. The same couches he and Haruka-chan sat on when they shared champagne after officially becoming a couple on Christmas Eve. The same couches they'd done so many other things on. Akiyama pulled out a cigarette and offered one to him, and he took it.

“Had a hard time coming up with one, to be honest. Knowing you, and considering our little history,” Majima-san scoffed, “I feel like I don't even need to give you a test. You approaching me and asking to begin with is no easy feat.” He sat back on the couch, crossing his legs and resting his arm across the back.

“Just get to the point.”

“Fine. Your test is this. Tell me why you need the money—”

“Easy.”

“And tell me why you were suspicious of me before Haruka-chan even started high school.” Majima-san’s brow twitched. Akiyama figured there would be a 50/50 shot that he would be willing to answer that.

“Will I get 50 mil if I only answer one?”

“Nope. All-or-nothing.” Akiyama was reminded of going to the arcade with Haruka-chan. They hadn't done that in so long. God, he missed her so much. Majima-san sighed.

“Can't I do some debt collectin’ for ya or somethin’ instead?”

“Guess you don't need the 100 mil that badly—”

“Fine!” Akiyama stared at him and waited. “I'll start with the first question. I need it because someone I care about is in danger. But I have no idea what kind of danger or who poses a threat or anything. If I pay… someone—”

“Who?”

“That's three questions you're askin’ me.”

“No, it's included in the first question.”

“Fine. It's The Florist, ya know ‘im?”

“I'm vaguely aware of his existence.”

“He's the one who got me that fucking video of you and Haruka-chan.”

“Ah.” Akiyama's cheeks went hot thinking about multiple people watching that video, watching his angel on her knees, sucking his cock before he came on her face.

“Yeah. Anyway, he knows everything that happens in this god-forsaken city, and if I give ‘im ¥100 million he'll tell me everythin’ I need to know.”

“I see. And the other question?” Majima-san still hesitated, and Akiyama leaned forward, elbows on knees. “Why were you suspicious of me?”

☆☆☆

“Bet you didn’t think I’d get this to ya, eh, Florist?” Majima walked all the way up to The Florist’s desk and plunked a metal briefcase on the tabletop. The Florist eyed it with curiosity, and Majima opened it, revealing ¥100 million. His eyes widened.

“You’re absolutely right, Majima-san, I didn’t.” He said nothing more.

“Well? Ya gonna tell me what I wanna know?”

“I haven’t accepted the cash yet.”

“Motherfucker. Just take the damn money and tell me why Makoto is in danger!”

“Settle down, boy, settle down.” Majima glared at him. “Fine, have a seat.”

☆☆☆

The Florist had in fact answered all of his questions. He must've decided it was worth it after receiving that 100 million. Aki-chan surprised him with that test though. He didn't care about telling him why he needed the money, but why he was suspicious of him? That took guts to ask and showed the guy was more perceptive than he thought. He lied to the guy, of course. Said some bullshit about seeing himself in him or something, and about his relationship with Mirei when she was still underage, that he thought the guy might pull the same thing with Haruka-chan. He wasn’t about to tell him the sad truth, the real reason. He was the last person in the world who should tell him that. If anything, the guy’s sister should tell him, but he wasn't about to ask The Florist to track her down.

And Makoto wasn't in any immediate danger, hadn't been for years. But she wasn't completely safe either. Once the trigger was pulled, a chain of events could suddenly put her at the center of attention of at least three different organizations.

He wasn’t about to just wait for something to happen. That 100 million earned Majima a lot of information, but if he wanted to ask anymore later, he had to pay up. And he wasn’t about to ask for another loan. He still had his dignity to watch out for.

He knew the organizations were: The Amon Clan, The Snake Flower Triad, and Black Monday.

The Amon Clan: a large family of assassins that Kiryu-chan had gone toe-to-toe with several times.

The Snake Flower Triad: a Chinese mafia group that held a tiny corner of Yokohama and was encroaching on Tokyo while also feuding with the Yokohama Liumang.

Black Monday: a rogue unit of CIA Agents who deal in international arms trafficking, terrorism, and espionage.

The common denominator: Fuck if he knew. But if some relative of Makoto’s died, a relative who was “high up the chain of command of the Triad”, then it wouldn’t take long for her to end up in the crossfire.

From what he understood, it was a situation of “everything is in a delicate balance that would come crumbling down the moment someone stepped out of line”. Everyone was just waiting for someone else to do it.

He also knew that The Amon Clan was struggling, his beloved Kiryu-chan having done a number on their reputation. They made it appear that they were still as strong as ever, but their quantity of clientele was quietly dwindling. He taught an Amon last year; she was in his homeroom class. He didn’t think there was any relation, but apparently, she was the daughter of one of the members of that clan.

And according to The Florist, the Triad also had a bit of a rough financial patch, but that was also pretty hush-hush, even from most of the underworld. He had connections out in Ijincho that he sometimes traded information with, and they were more than happy to tell him about the state of the Triad.

The Amon Clan had been eyeing the resources that the Triad had, or at least they believed it had, for quite some time. The Triad was expanding, but not too quickly. It was small, but no pushover against larger organizations. The Amon Clan didn’t stand a chance against them on their own. Unless something happened that made them start to crumble. Like a top official suddenly kicking it and putting the entire organization at risk of internal turmoil.

Meanwhile, Black Monday, while still paltry and never got their hands dirty themselves, was seeking loftier goals after a new leader was appointed a few years ago. This new guy wanted to put them more on the offensive and stationed an auxiliary headquarters in Kawasaki, right in the path of the Triad. They even sold some of their inventory to the Amon Clan, likely in hopes it'll wipe out the Triad for them. One of the Black Monday guys already started making a move last year but went into hiding at some point a few months ago.

Why Makoto would have anything to do with any of this: being a relative of this higher-up who was on his last legs, she could potentially inherit the Triad—most Triads and other similar organizations from the Chinese mainland had such a system of heredity, many even were primogeniture, systems where the firstborn legitimate child is the only one to inherit everything from the parent. Or she could be completely forgotten about and brushed aside, not even having a mention in his will. But if she were mentioned in the will at all, all eyes could turn to her, and she'd suddenly have three organizations looking to take advantage of her or even assassinate her. That uncertainty killed Majima the most.

He didn’t tell Makoto any of this, she didn’t need to know until something happened. She had fought so hard for the peaceful life she had now, he wasn’t about to tear that away from her. But he did suddenly feel the need to see her much more often, be around her much more often.

Maybe he’d go get takoyaki with her.

Chapter Text

Saturday, 18 October 2014

There was banging on Haruka’s apartment door. At first, she thought it was her friends trying to see her again, but the banging was too loud and incessant. It was so loud she hid under her blanket. Ojisan opened the door, and his and another male’s voice drifted through.

“She just needs to be left alone—”

“Bullshit, let me see her—”

“No, please, just go—”

“I’m not leaving until I can see her—”

“Why do you care—?”

“What’s it matter—?”

“It matters a great deal—”

“I haven’t seen her in a month, I'm not allowed to be concerned about that—?”

“I tell you every time you call that she’ll be back at school soon—”

“And she still hasn’t come back yet!”

Curiosity got the better of her. She stood up from her futon and peeked out just enough to see the front door. It was wide open, the white light of the sun beaming through hurt her eyes, and she couldn’t make out the face of the man standing in the doorway.

But she didn’t need to.

She dashed back into her room and cowered under her blanket again. What an idiot, why did he come here!? Footsteps stomped toward her room as Ojisan continued to argue, not yet resorting to physical violence. The bedroom door slid open, and she grasped onto her blanket as tightly as she could. Ojisan stopped arguing. He must’ve known the unstoppable force that had flown into their little apartment. She could feel the footsteps getting closer to her, and they stopped directly next to her. He crouched beside her and spoke so softly that even Ojisan might not have been able to hear him.

“Haruka-chan.” His voice. She hadn’t heard it in so long. It was so beautiful. He pressed his hand by her shoulder, trying to figure out where she was within the blanket. His large, calloused hand that she had held so many times, that had stroked her hair so many times, that had cupped her cheek so many times. He shifted, and it sounded like he was sitting down beside her now. Settling in for the long haul. “Kiryu-san, can I ask you to leave us alone? I know you probably don’t want to, given our… history. But please. Do me this one kindness.” Ojisan walked away without a word and turned on the TV, the volume of the laughter from the game show he turned on much louder than usual. The tatami mats scraped as Akiyama-san scooted closer to her, and he lowered his face right by her head. Even under the blanket, she could hear his desperation. “Haruka-chan. Let me see that gorgeous face of yours. Please.”

She said nothing, didn't even move.

“I miss you so much.” He rested his forehead on her. He didn’t say anything else. He didn't need to.

I miss you too. But you should look for someone better, someone more deserving of you.

After what felt like several minutes but was probably only a few seconds, he removed his forehead. She hoped he had given up and would just get up and leave. Instead, he grasped at her blanket and started tugging at it. She scrambled to clutch as much of the blanket as she could, but he was always so much stronger than her. She was always so weak.

Silently, after only a few seconds of struggling, he ripped the blanket off of her. She curled in on herself, shielding her face with her arms.

“Haruka-chan, when did you last take a bath?” God, this was so embarrassing. She stayed silent. He placed his hand on her head and slowly stroked her hair, just like when she rested her head on his lap when they were napping under that tree. Impossible that that was over a year ago now. Her hair must be so oily, but he didn’t make any indication that he cared. “Why won’t you look at me?”

I just might shatter if I do.

He shifted to stand and said, “Alright, I’m done being gentle. Come on,” at a normal volume, and scooped his hands underneath her. She was so surprised that she didn’t even get a chance to react as she was suddenly lifted off the ground, and he hoisted her high in the air, hands grasping her waist. He looked up at her with a face of determination before shifting to a soft smile. “There you are.” He placed her feet on the ground, and they stood in front of each other for the first time since that fight. They could only look at each other, stare at each other. Partly because Ojisan was still just down the hall. “Go take a bath.”

“Huh?”

“I said, ‘Go take a bath’. It’ll help you feel better.”

“It’s not like I have a cold—”

“Do as I say, young lady,” he asserted. She was so shocked that she walked to the bathroom without another word.

☆☆☆

After Haruka-chan exited the bedroom, Akiyama took a moment to look around. The shelves were dusty. There was trash and dirty dishes strewn about. Her futon was closer to the wall than he remembered, both her phones plugged in and in reach. The one he bought her was underneath a pillow that had been moved when he lifted her.  He fought the urge to snoop through either of her phones to see her conversations with her buyers, deciding that it was better for him to not know who she was talking to and what about.

As the sound of the bath water running through the pipes started, he walked over to her closet. Her uniform was hanging up on a hook on the closet door—he hadn’t seen her wear it in weeks, and dust was building on the shoulders of her blazer. He tentatively opened the door. Her clothes were haphazardly thrown on hangers, on shelves, in drawers, nothing folded or even in any discernible organization. His eyes shifted to the corner, and he found her stash. Glass bottles filled with shades of amber or completely colorless, some half-empty, some with only a few drops left. He slowly started taking them out of her closet.

But what am I going to do with these? Throw them out? She’ll just get more. Confront her about it? That’ll just lead to another fight. Tell Kiryu-san? The man looks worn down enough already, and there’s a good chance he already knows about it anyway.

He decided to just put them on full display by her futon. She was going to drink them anyway, and now he can communicate “I know” without having to fight her.

The water stopped running. He so desperately wanted to be there with her, spend more time with her, see her for just a little longer. But Kiryu-san was home.

Wait, isn’t there a window…?

“Kiryu-san, I’m heading out. Thanks for letting me see her.” Kiryu-san looked at him, surprised.

“How’d you do that?”

“Do what?”

“Get her to get up? To go take a bath?”

“I gave her a bit more of a push, I guess.”

“I might have you come back if she’ll listen to you like that,” he said, half-joking.

“Just being a good homeroom teacher. And a friend.”

And a partner.

“See you, Kiryu-san.”

“Bye, Akiyama-san.”

As Akiyama stepped out of the apartment, he swiftly crept around the balcony until he was at the window of Haruka-chan’s bathroom. It was chilly out, and the window was shut, the blinds shuttered. He carefully knocked on the glass. Several seconds later, a single, beautiful brown eye peeked out from behind one of the blinds. She opened the blinds, pulled them up a few inches, and unlocked the window, opening it just a crack.

“Akiyama-san?”

“Can I come in?” he asked with a cheeky grin.

“You gonna climb in?”

“Yeah?” She pulled the blinds up farther, opened the window all the way, and stepped aside, giving him plenty of room. He grasped the windowsill with both hands and deftly pulled himself up and over, swinging his legs in one at a time. He landed on his toes, bending his knees low to not make a sound. Haruka-chan quickly closed the window, lowered the blinds, and stood next to him. Akiyama stood up carefully, suppressing a groan. Sure, he knew the bathroom didn’t carry sound nearly as well as the rest of the apartment, and Kiryu-san kept the TV on, but this was the riskiest move he had ever made.

He looked at her, and it was then he noticed three things in rapid succession:

1. She was standing in front of him completely naked
2. He had never seen her in that state before
3. She had scars and cuts all over her

“Haruka-chan, what—” She hopped right back into the bathtub, hiding her body under the bubbles. Akiyama walked over and crouched next to the tub. He rested his arms on the rim and placed his head on his arms, staring at her face. “Haruka-chan.” He had no idea what else to say. What do you say? 'I’m sorry'? 'How can I help'? She probably didn’t want his sympathy right now. But what he saw terrified him. He reached a hand out and patted her head. “Need help washing your hair?” She looked at him briefly, turned away, and nodded. “Ok, get your hair wet,” he said as he shifted to grab her shampoo and rest in a comfortable enough position. She dunked her head into the water and waited several seconds before coming up for air. Just long enough for Akiyama to start getting scared. He rolled up his sleeves, dipped his hands in the water, squeezed some shampoo in his hand, rubbed his hands together, and started running his fingers through her hair.

It was a difficult task. Her hair was tangled, almost matted in some parts, and he had to slowly work from the ends of her hair upwards. She kept her head leaning forward and said nothing as he slowly worked through the knots and massaged her scalp. She had flakes of dry skin stuck at the roots, and he needed her to dunk her hair in the water multiple times to rinse it all out and reapply shampoo to get every last part. After, he grabbed the bottle of accompanying conditioner and gently applied it end to root, finding smaller knots he had missed before.

He was so blessed that he could do this for her. He was baptizing his angel, massaging reverence into every last follicle. How he yearned to do this for her whenever she needed. He wanted to move in and help her with all of these little tasks or drag her to his place where he could keep her all to himself and meet her every want and need. And make sure she got to school every day.

Once he was done, his fingers were pruney from being soaked in her wet hair.

“Ok, all done, you can rinse now.” She dunked her head completely underwater again and shook her head to rinse out the excess conditioner, her dark hair floating like seaweed in a deep pool.

After she came up for air again, Akiyama placed his hand on the back of her head and pulled her in for a kiss. A kiss of deep wanting and tender care.

“Make sure you brush your teeth too,” he said, and she looked away, ashamed. “Hey, hey, I’m not trying to make fun of you. I just want you to take care of yourself, ok?” He gave her a kiss on the forehead and carefully stood, stretching his limbs, bones cracking.

“Are you leaving?” she asked quietly.

“No, I just needed to stretch. Do you want me to?”

“...no.”

“Then I’m definitely staying.”

As Haruka-chan slowly worked through her cleaning routine, Akiyama sat by the tub—just being there in her presence again was enough for him. He helped her occasionally, grabbed her a bottle of something, washed her back, gave her the occasional kiss. He also wanted to keep an eye to make sure she was only cleaning herself. He couldn’t see a blade anywhere, but he knew a fresh cut when he saw one. She suddenly let out a heavy sigh and started to stand. He stood up quickly to help, grabbing a towel and wrapping it around her to keep her from the cold. And so he didn’t have to see the scars. He wrapped his arms around her and held her from behind, digging his face in her wet hair that now also smelled like that cherry blossom shampoo again.

“It’s good to have you back,” he whispered. She rested a hand on his arm.

“Let me brush my teeth,” she responded, and he removed his arms from her. He stood by her, watching her through the mirror. She caught him staring, and he smiled. She removed her eyes from him and continued to brush her teeth. Once she finished and rinsed out her mouth, he pulled her in close for another deep kiss. She finally returned the kiss, and let his tongue slip into her mouth, wrapping her arms around him in return. He pulled her in closer, and her towel dropped. She was fully nude, and this time he could feel all of her. He stifled a moan, released his lips from hers, and stared into her eyes. Those beautiful brown eyes.

“What’s wrong?” he asked. Tears had started to pool in those eyes.

“I’m sorry,” she struggled to say.

“For what?”

“I’m sorry,” she said again.

“Angel, you have nothing to apologize for,” he said, brows furrowed in confusion. She put her hands to her face, and he pulled her in for a tight embrace, shushing her and telling her everything was ok.

A knock on the door.

“Haruka, you ok? You’ve been in there a while,” Kiryu-san’s voice bellowed through the door. Akiyama had forgotten the man was still there.

“I’m fine, Ojisan. Just enjoying the warm water,” she called back, as deft at lying as ever.

“Ok, just wanted to make sure.”

“You should go,” Haruka-chan whispered to Akiyama.

“I guess so,” he responded. He didn’t move, didn’t take one step. “I don’t want to go.” She looked at him sympathetically and walked to the window. After some hesitation, she opened it and silently waited for him. “Please come to school on Monday. I miss you. Your friends miss you too.”

“I won’t promise anything.” He looked at his feet, which he just realized still had shoes on them.

“Sorry, probably tracked dirt in here.”

“It’s ok.” He walked slowly to the window, turned to look at her one last time, and climbed out. He stayed staring inside, looking at her. “Go.”

“Can I get one more kiss before I go?” She smiled, stood on her toes, and leaned out the window. He cupped her cheek with his hand and gave her one final tender kiss before resting his forehead on hers. “Please, don’t ignore me anymore.” She looked at him, and tears started to well in her eyes again. “Oh, angel. Don’t worry, I still… care about you so much. I don’t hate you if that’s what you’re thinking.” She simply shook her head and said nothing more. “Ok, I’ll go now. Bye,” he whispered.

“Bye.” He gave her one final soft kiss on her forehead and stepped back, and she slowly closed the window and the blinds, watching each other until their view was blocked completely. Akiyama rubbed his face with his hands and sighed heavily. He had no idea what to expect out of today. He got more than he hoped for, at least. But those scars and cuts… 

Her not being able to bathe or brush her teeth regularly was concerning too. Was she just lying on her futon all day? Then how’d she get all that booze? He had to stop himself there from spiraling down that thought whirlpool.

He briefly had a girlfriend, well over a decade ago now, who was also sick. He didn't realize it when they met, she was so bright and full of life, constantly wanting to do something new. People talked about mental health even less back then, and words like “depression” or “bipolar” weren't even in his lexicon. He did his best to be kind and loving, and he remembered some of the things she asked him to help with. And he also remembered how she described how she felt, what he witnessed.

He cringed at his selfishness now. He dumped her after not being able to deal with her anymore. He wanted to focus on his career, and it was exhausting to have to do so much for her with little in return. A load of good that did, he was fired less than a year later after being framed for embezzlement. He had no idea where she was or what she was doing now. Or if she was even alive.

He wasn't going to do that this time. He was older now, more mature. And he loved Haruka-chan so much, he wanted to help her, he didn't feel obligated or like he was going out of his way to do anything for her.

Not wanting to be seen by Kiryu-san just now walking away from the apartment building, he walked around back to try to find an exit. He knew there was a giant tree nearby, its large branches always helpfully providing some extra cover for them whenever he parked around the corner.

Alright, just don't fall. Old bones, don't fail me now.

He hopped onto the balcony railing and swiftly jumped to the tree, gingerly finding the branch and carefully crawling across. He firmly grasped the branch and let himself dangle from it before dropping onto the concrete of the sidewalk next to where he parked his car. Around the corner out of habit.

God, I hope no one saw me. Feels like escaping after her husband comes home early. Or like I'm a teenage boy sneaking out after her dad came home. I like that one better.

☆☆☆

Haruka had forgotten how Akiyama-san made her feel: warm, cozy, cared for. Loved.

She wished he didn’t. That would make pushing him to find someone better for him much easier. He even took the time to wash her hair, made sure she brushed her teeth. She didn’t deserve someone like that. He didn’t even interrogate her about her cuts.

‘It’s good to have you back,’ he had said.

‘I don’t want to go.’

‘Please come to school on Monday.’ 

‘I miss you.’

‘Please, don’t ignore me anymore.’

She was the worst person in the world for hurting him so much.

After she toweled herself dry, she walked back over to her bedroom, not even realizing she hadn’t put her clothes back on, not even able to fully focus on anything except to walk over to her closet.

But she didn’t need to go all the way over to her closet.

Her bottles were already all laid out in front of her.

Is he taunting me? Trying to make a game of this? Trying to make me drink? Or is this some kind of reverse psychology? Ugh.

She realized she was cold, looked down at her naked body, and walked to her closet to grab some clothes. She had no idea where anything was and grabbed the first shirt and indoor pants she could find. She walked over to her stash that was now lined up right next to her futon, picked one at random, and settled in for the night.

At least I have enough that I won’t have to meet up with anyone for a while.

Monday, 20 October 2014

Akiyama arrived at school early. Haruka-chan said she wouldn’t promise anything, but it wasn’t an outright denial. He had to make sure he was there if she showed up.

As he entered the faculty office, he quickly greeted the few people who were there, dropped off all of his stuff, and jogged to Classroom 2-B. Only a few students were in the building, and he was the first in the classroom itself. Every person who walked by the windows into the hallway got his attention. Students slowly trickled in, and the time of the start of the school day approached much too quickly. He was pacing, and stepped out into the hall several times, walking as far as the stairwell to see if she was on her way up. No one said anything, but some of the students stared each time he came back.

3 minutes left. Come on, Haruka-chan, hurry!

In his excitement of just seeing her again, Akiyama had completely forgotten to return her bracelet and necklace to her. If she showed up today, he was going to give them to her. He couldn’t show up at her apartment again, not so soon after being there. Even though Kiryu-san appeared grateful that he got her to get up and bathe, that didn't mean he could go into the man’s daughter's bedroom every other day.

2 minutes.

He was starting to lose hope. She didn't say she would show up, not even that she might. He was so foolish to get so worked up and excited.

1 minute.

She wasn't a lost cause, that much was clear. Even if she didn't show up today, he was still going to pester her to get her to come.

30 seconds.

Loud footsteps running up the stairs echoed through the hall. He walked to the doorway of the classroom and looked in the direction it was coming from. Her ponytail was bouncing with her footsteps, her skirt swishing as her legs kicked the hem up. It took everything he had to not run up to her and hold her, and even more so to not start crying on the spot. He walked back into the classroom, faced the chalkboard, took a deep breath, and put on his ‘homeroom teacher’ face.

“Sawamura-san. Welcome back.” She was standing at the threshold, hand grasping the doorframe, catching her breath.

“I made it on time?” The final bell chimed, and he smiled at her. A friendly smile that he probably shouldn’t give her in front of the other students, but he didn’t care at that moment.

“Looks like it,” he said, and he watched her take her seat.

Me: You have no idea how happy you've made me today, angel. Seeing your face made my whole world brighter.

☆☆☆

When Haruka saw Akiyama-sensei's smiling face upon her arrival, she almost convinced herself that she would start coming to school every day again. And when she walked to her desk, she met eyes with Akari-chan, who also had a beaming smile on her face. Maybe coming back wouldn't be so bad.

Getting up that morning was no easy feat, and she still didn't do her entire morning routine. But, she ate some food, brushed her teeth, and even washed her face. More than she had been capable of doing for weeks.

The rest of her teachers throughout the morning also made comments about her being back. It was getting pretty embarrassing, honestly, but at least everyone looked happy to see her.

Until lunchtime.

Haruka was sitting in 2-B with her friends, catching up on what she had missed during the past month, while also not disclosing at all what she’d been up to. She felt the presence of people behind her, and she stopped breathing.

“Well, well, well. Teacher’s little pet is back. Where were you? Recovering from an abortion or something?” Amon-san said, and the girls around her laughed.

“Did you see how excited he was to see her? He was looking down the halls and pacing and shit,” one of the other girls said.

“For real, and that smile? And then leering at her as she walked to her chair? What a gross old man!” Hori-san said, and the girls laughed again.

“He was so depressed all month, it was like a cloud was following him or something! Staring out the window and sighing all the time.”

Haruka was hardly able to focus, and she drifted away through the halls, down the stairs, to the school grounds, the tree line.

“Haruka-chan, I didn't know you were coming back today!” she suddenly heard. She turned and saw Kasuga-sensei standing next to her, all other students abandoning ship.

“Kasuga-sensei! It's good to be back,” she told him. He eyed the students who were no longer surrounding her.

“It probably could be better though, hm?”

“O-oh, it's ok, nothing to worry about.” He simply looked at her before greeting the other students and moving on to class 2-C. He was able to save her for now, but she still had the rest of the day to contend with.

Maybe she shouldn't have come back.

☆☆☆

“Akiyama-san, a word?” Akiyama heard from the door of the faculty office. He turned in his chair and saw Kasuga-san standing in the doorway, hands in pockets, severe face.

Am I the only one that makes his face turn like that?

“Of course, Kasuga-san,” he said, standing and doing his best to steady his breath. He walked out into the hall, and Kasuga-san stood close to him.

“Haruka-chan's been getting bullied relentlessly. It might be a good idea for you to not interact with her at all for now.” Akiyama looked at him, shocked. He hadn't seen Haruka-chan since homeroom, he had just assumed things would go well, that the kids would stop. “That public statement didn't accomplish anything, and I regret letting you two go through with it. I should’ve fought the idea more. But, Akiyama-san.” Kasuga-san leaned closer, speaking so softly that Akiyama had to strain to hear. “Are you sure you and Haruka-chan are purely platonic?”

“Why does no one seem to believe me when I say there's nothing going on?”

“Why, indeed, Aki-chan.” Akiyama jumped and looked at Majima-san standing beside him, just as close as Kasuga-san was.

“How the fuck did you hear him?” he asked Majima-san.

“Mad Dogs have good hearing.” He squinted his eye and stared at Akiyama. Was he daring him to confess? He held back after that initial visit from his yakuza buddies, but that didn't mean he was off the hook. And after he told him why he was suspicious…

“Well, either way, you're barking up the wrong tree. People will believe what they want, it's almost impossible to convince them otherwise. It's easier to prove the presence of something than the absence.” Both men left him after that. He leaned his head back against the wall and sighed. Why couldn't he be left in peace!? He's dealing with enough as it is!

Me: Angel, how has your day been? I'm sure it's a lot after being gone for a month.

          Read

Fuck.

☆☆☆

Mayflower’s blog:

Entry #58

went back 2 skool 2day

it sucked

saw A 4 teh 1st time in a month a cuple days ago

he showed up @ my apt out of teh blue & demanded 2 c me 2 my dad

he clamed 2 jst b a homeroom teacher & freind

he snuck in 2 teh bathroom & washed my hair

it felt so nice

he asked me 2 come back 2 skool so i decided 2 try 2day

evry1 still rembered teh rumors

A did an awful job hiding his exitement 4 me coming back which didnt help

ppl kept saying mean things 2 me teasing me someone thru a mean note @ my head

i dont think ill b going back tmrw

☆☆☆

Tuesday: I think she'll come to school again today!

                 Wednesday: Maybe she'll still come in today?

                                 Thursday: I hope she decides to come back today.

                                                    Friday: She's not coming in today, is she?

Chapter Text

Another knock on the door, another attempt by Haruka to hide under her blanket. She listened for who it was, desperately hoping it was Akiyama-san, desperately hoping it wasn't. A familiar voice traveled down the hall, but it was a female voice.

“How's Haruka-chan doing?”

“I can't lie to you, Makimura-sensei, she's not doing great. She's been skipping school.”

“I heard from Majima-san that she hadn't been showing up.”

“Well, I guess that's why you're here.”

“Can I come in?”

Dread washed over her. Makimura-sensei made the effort to come all the way here to see her, and it won't amount to anything. Her bedroom door slid open.

“Haruka-chan, it's Makimura-sensei. Come on out.” She didn't move. She heard footsteps approach her and could almost feel Makimura-sensei sit next to her. “Haruka-chan. I'm here to help, to listen. Come out, now.” She stayed perfectly still. “You’ve been going through a lot lately. You must be feeling miserable right now. I see your bottles here too.” Haruka couldn’t respond. “You’ve been drinking a lot. How do you feel about that?” Haruka regretted not putting the bottles away after Akiyama-san pulled them all out, but the thought of putting them away was already exhausting her. And Ojisan never said anything about it. And they were so much easier to reach when they were right next to her futon.

“Awful,” she said from under her blanket.

“In what way?”

“I'm so ashamed. I'm just hurting everyone. They don't deserve that.”

“And that's why you hide in here? Away from everyone? You can't hurt them from here?” Haruka nodded before saying yes, realizing Makimura-sensei couldn't see her. “Have you considered that hiding in here away from everyone is hurting them more? That they'd rather be able to see you and spend time with you?”

“Why would they? I'm so awful, I can hardly pay attention to anything, I get exhausted after doing anything. And when I’m not drunk all I can think about is getting drunk.”

“Why do you think about getting drunk so much?” Haruka would usually get annoyed and upset at such a question, snapping at the person for asking. But she was so tired. And she already said this much, may as well keep going.

“Because I need it. I hate how I feel when I'm sober. I shake, everyone annoys me, my nightmares come back. It's easier to be alive when I’m drunk.”

“What would happen if you stopped? If you didn't drink anymore?”

Haruka waited a few moments to respond.

“...I’d kill myself.”

“That's your only option?”

“It would just be torture to live like that every day. I already kinda hate all this, but when I'm drunk I can ignore it and feel good.”

“Withdrawal is difficult to manage. Most people struggle with it when trying to quit. But it doesn't last very long. The shaking and irritability would stop.”

“And what about the nightmares? The bullying? That won't stop.”

“Not right away, no. It would take time and work—”

“I CAN'T FUCKING DO THAT!” she yelled, voice echoing under the blanket.

“Yes, you can.”

“No! I can't!”

“You did it before, I know you can do it again.”

“Can you stop my classmates from calling me a whore!? From writing ‘slut’ on my desk!? From throwing shit at me!?”

“Majima-san told me about it. He's told me quite a lot, actually.” Haruka stopped breathing. What a loaded statement, why would she say it like that!? Makimura-sensei continued. “Bullying is a difficult thing to deal with, and bullies are even more difficult to get to stop. It must be so painful to deal with every day. I'm sorry.” Haruka had to suppress a sob.  No one had said that to her before. “But there are paths we can take. And I will help you. I'll tell Majima-san how he can help you too. I promise. I won't lie and say they will stop altogether. But we can at least do something.” 

Haruka was running out of excuses. No matter what she said, Makimura-sensei wouldn't hear it. The woman foolishly believed in her.

“I'll let you think about all of that, ok? I'll come back next week. Thank you for listening to me.” Makimura-sensei stood and left without another word. Haruka heard her and Ojisan speak a little more, unclear from under the blanket.

Think about it? All she does is think! Day in, day out, she dwells and broods on her futon, distracted only by the words and pictures on her phone screen. Nothing she ever thought about amounted to anything helpful. Nothing mattered. There was no hope for her. She was just a living corpse, floating through space and time until the earth claimed her again.

☆☆☆

How could it be that months had already passed? Every day, when Kiryu wasn’t at work, he was home, awake, waiting for Haruka to come home. He feared that the one time he didn’t, she’d disappear again. She never stayed out so late that he wasn’t sure she’d be coming home. At least there was that.

Every few nights, she would tell him she was staying at her friend’s place for the night. At least she told him. But something deep within him wondered if that were true. He always took what she said at face value, but that didn’t mean he didn’t know she sometimes lied to him. He just rarely knew when.

He also never knew for certain where she was going, who she was with. Maybe West Park, maybe somewhere else. But knowing would do nothing to help him, so he never asked. He preferred not to know, actually. She always came home, that was all he cared about. Perhaps foolishly, he still trusted her to take care of herself and protect herself. She never came home crying or disheveled or bruised. She’d just stumble through that front door, walk right past him without even a ‘hello’, and fall asleep within minutes.

At least there was the silver lining that he got better at making food. Even if she wasn’t cooking, they still had to eat. Sometimes she would come home with food for him. Whenever she did, she would plunk it on the little table in front of him, still without a word. She never told him where it came from, but she wouldn’t give him food she didn’t trust. She only ever brought food home when she claimed she was staying with her friend the night before. Whoever she was with seemed to care at least a little bit. But if he didn’t have that, he had to learn to make at least a couple of basics—convenience store food was cheap, but it was much cheaper still to just buy food at the grocery store and make it yourself.

Once a week, he’d get a call from Akiyama-san. It was always the same.

“She’s barely shown up to homeroom.” “She’s missing her assignments.” “She doesn’t pay any attention in class.” “She failed her math test.”

He understood that it was the man’s duty to do so as her homeroom teacher, but every time he found himself getting more and more annoyed. It’s not like he’s an absent father who spends 16 hours a day at work and has no idea what’s going on. He knew exactly what was going on, and these calls only dug his shame deeper. There was nothing he could do for her except watch her.

He got calls from Nishiki at times too, inviting him to Serena every now and then.

“Reina misses you! And I never get to see you either! Come on out, let’s catch up!”

He always had an excuse ready. If he spent the evening at Serena, and that was the evening that Haruka was in too much danger for her to handle on her own, he’d never be able to live with himself. And he didn’t feel as eager about sharing drinks with people in general these days. Best he just stay home.

Majima-no-nii-san dropped by a few times, hoping to cheer him up. He never brought any drinks with him—Kiryu told him about Haruka when he passed most of his bottles on to him. There were still times when he just needed a drink himself, so he kept some Japanese whiskey in a loose panel in the ceiling of the bathroom.

Then there was that night. The night Haruka told him she could be Yumi for him. That was a low point for him, and he may regret giving in so easily to her for the rest of his life. Of course, he noticed how much she’d grown, how similar she was to Yumi, both in looks and personality. Haruka was a bit feistier and more confident than her, but she had the same wit and intelligence and kindness. And he missed her so much. In the dark, when she called him ‘Kazuma’ in that voice that was almost identical to Yumi’s, he was ready to believe her ghost had possessed her, had blessed him with her presence to care for him. Where she learned how to act like that—tease him like that, grind her hips against him like that, stroke his cock like that—he had no idea. It was another thing he decided not to think about. He also decided not to think about how much he wanted to do it again.

The night that Date-san brought her home was the night he truly regretted not doing more for her. She looked absolutely distraught, and Date-san not saying anything beyond, ‘Found her in Kamurocho. Decided to bring her home,’ was even more concerning. The man must be hiding something, but no way could he figure out what. But all that mattered was that Haruka was home, safe. When she ran into his arms, it felt like she was finally back.

Except she wasn’t. She had nightmares again that night. He hadn’t had to comfort her in weeks, and he had a hard time cuddling up with her under her blanket, her pretending to be Yumi still fresh in his mind. He was even more conscious of where his hands went, how his legs rested, how her hips sat.

Whatever happened that night must’ve been bad because she suddenly stopped going to school. Kiryu said nothing at first, maybe she was sick and needed to rest. But when she skipped a whole week, he started getting concerned. Akiyama-san called him about her skipping as if that would do anything. He just told her she was sick, that was all.

The days continued to crawl by. Haruka left her room less and less, going out only every couple of days, returning with a plastic bag carrying a bottle or two of something. Akiyama-san continued to call, and every time he just said she was sick and would be back soon. He should’ve known that wouldn’t work forever.

When Akiyama-san came banging on his door, he still tried to keep him at bay. Haruka needed to rest, to be by herself. Pushing her would do nothing, even if it were from Akiyama-san.

He was almost impressed when the man pushed passed him to get inside and stormed to her bedroom to see her. That bravery and determination was like Haruka’s. When he asked him to leave them alone, he obviously wasn’t thrilled with the idea. And Akiyama-san knew that, ‘given our history’. But the man got this far, and maybe he had a better idea of what to do with her. He still turned on the TV and kept the volume up, not wanting to hear anything the man could be saying or doing to his daughter. The last time he listened in, he heard much too much for him to be comfortable with. No, the less he knew, the better. 

It ended up being the right thing to do in the end. Somehow, he managed to convince her to get up and bathe, something he couldn’t do himself, and something she was only able to convince herself to do maybe once a week or so.

He was less surprised than he probably should have been when Makimura-sensei suddenly made a house call. While she tried to talk to Haruka, she mentioned Majima-no-nii-san contacting her. That put a smile on his face. He knew a bit about what happened between the two in ’88, him having been there to help her too. He still regretted not saving her older brother in time for her to reunite with him, but she seemed to have since found happiness.

After the first few sentences they exchanged, he had to turn the TV on to drown them out. He was close to crying listening to his daughter talk like that. The last thing he heard her say was “I'm so ashamed. I'm just hurting everyone. They don't deserve that.”

He thanked Makimura-sensei as she left and walked over to the bedroom to check on Haruka one more time. She was still under her blanket, silent. He returned to the living room without another word.

☆☆☆

Usami could only watch as Sawamura-chan looked worse and worse. He never got to be around her, how was he supposed to help her?

Not even Akiyama-sensei seemed to be able to help her. That was the most puzzling part. Why would she be with a guy who couldn’t help and support her while her classmates bullied her like that? While she struggled to keep up in school? After exams, everyone’s names were written on a giant board in the school lobby, ordered by level of performance. Last year, Sawamura-chan was frequently in the top 20 of her class aside from Japanese literature. This year she hardly broke the top 150. What was up with her? He had to be the one to stand up for her!

Except, the one time he tried, he was just pushed aside. No one listened to him at all! Why wouldn’t they!? He was the voice of reason, the one to step in and help her when no one else could!

But why couldn’t anyone else help her? She had three close friends who were always by her side, a grown man who was looking out for her whenever he saw them in the same room together, a father who cared for her based on the one time he met him. And she herself was one of the strongest people he had ever met behind maybe only his mom.

If none of them could help her, if she was so deep that she couldn’t help herself, how could he possibly be the one to help her? Sure, he knew they were meant to be, and he could comfort and console her if she ever let him, but what could he really do beyond that? His attempts were fruitless, his passion ignored.

He needed to be stronger for her. He needed to look at himself and figure out what he could do to be better and good enough to help her.

“Weird question, but… what do you guys think my flaws are?” he asked his friends during lunch.

“Huh? Where’s that coming from?” Matsunaga-kun asked.

“Well, off the top of my head, you’re selfish, obsessive, pretty misogynistic, narci—”

“You were way too eager to answer that,” Usami cut Tagashira-kun off.

“Are you finally taking our advice to find strength and purpose within yourself instead of projecting it all on Sawamura-san?” Nagumo-kun asked.

“Ugh, why’d you have to take psychology as one of your electives?” Usami asked.

“Because my beloved Kiyo-chan is!”

“Right.”

“Seriously, man, where’s this coming from?” Matsunaga-kun asked again.

“I need to be better so I can help Sawamura-chan.” Matsunaga-kun rolled his eyes.

“Again with—”

“Any reason is a good reason!” Nagumo-kun proclaimed.

After that conversation, along with recalling the advice Akiyama-sensei gave him after their date at the museum on how to woo her, Usami had a good place to start.

He scoured through forum posts online from other guys who were trying to be better, trying to make themselves worthy of a girl they liked. A lot of it was hard to parse, conflicting advice plastered everywhere. Keeping Akiyama-sensei’s advice as a baseline helped.

Whenever he was nicer to her, once he took Akiyama-sensei’s advice he gave him after his date with Sawamura-chan at the museum, she was more receptive—that’s what led to those wonderful 47 days to begin with. And he dropped all of that so quickly. Sure, it was because she basically cuc—no, no, that’s not what happened. They never declared themselves to be a proper couple, never kissed, hardly even held hands. They just kinda hung out sometimes. And Matsunaga-kun educated him on what cucking was, he was way off base with all of that.

So, for any post he read, he considered if it was something Akiyama-sensei would advise him to do. It soon became clear which posts came from guys who were just vengeful, lonely losers and which posts came from guys who actually had success with girls.

He soon realized he had treated her poorly—some of the things he thought about her or her friends really weren’t kind. Why would she want someone who looked down on her and her friends like that? They all got along well with Akiyama-sensei, and even he had flaws.

But he knew he was capable of being better, he had it within himself. He just had to figure out how to find it again.

☆☆☆

Haruka-chan’s birthday was just a couple of weeks away. Her 18th birthday. Akiyama had wanted to do something special for her 18th birthday ever since Christmas Eve the previous year when they officially got together. And he still did. Of course he still did. Sure, the past few months played out differently than he expected, but he was determined to celebrate for her. 

And, yes, he had been hoping that she’d want to fuck on her 18th birthday, too, if they hadn’t already by then. He hadn’t gotten any for over a year. Of course, he very much enjoyed what he and Haruka-chan had done so far, but there was a reason sex was referred to as “going the farthest”, and why it was the ultimate goal of so many couples. He wanted to be inside her, to be engulfed by her, to be so close to her he could feel all of her.

From how fast they had moved when they first started dating, he had estimated they’d be fucking by summer break. No such luck. But that didn’t matter. He had so much more he could do for her.

He decided to keep it slow and simple—who knew how much energy she’d have on her birthday, best to be prepared for the worst and hope for the best. Should he make dinner plans? Probably best to eat in. How can he convince her to come all the way to his apartment? Getting her to walk even to his car parked around the corner might be too big of an ask. But no way could he just knock on her front door. “Hey, Kiryu-san, just stopped by to pick up your daughter on her 18th birthday to celebrate!” No, he’d be out cold before finishing his sentence. There was that bathroom window, he could meet her there. But what would she tell Kiryu-san? That she’ll be in the bathroom for a few hours and not disturb her?

All of that back and forth suddenly became irrelevant. One morning, a few days before her birthday, she showed up to school again. Akiyama was so caught off guard he almost forgot how to act in front of the other students. She was smiling, chatting excitedly with her friends, eating lunch that she had made herself. She didn’t even care about the gossiping of the other students. It would almost be worrisome if it didn’t make Akiyama so happy and relieved to see her old self again. In fact, she was more energetic than before. When going down the stairs, she’d slide on the rail or jump down altogether. When he drove past her as he was entering the school grounds, she enthusiastically waved and almost ran out into the street. He was beside himself. She even approached him in the hallway, acting way too familiar with him in front of other students. She never touched him or anything, but she stood a little too close and spoke about things besides her missing assignments.

This sudden change confused Majima-san just as much as it confused Akiyama. 

“Hey, Majima-san, did something happen with Haruka-chan recently?”

“I was gonna ask you.”

Me: Angel, I want to do something with you for your birthday. Have you made plans with anyone yet?

😇🩷🌸Haruka-chan🌸🩷😇: ill b wit ojisan on monday and i think my friends want 2 do smth on the saturday before.

😇🩷🌸Haruka-chan🌸🩷😇: im free sunday tho

Me: Perfect.

Me: Plans are made. Do you think you’ll be up for going out Sunday?

😇🩷🌸Haruka-chan🌸🩷😇: yeah of corse!

😇🩷🌸Haruka-chan🌸🩷😇: ill b seeing u thats most important

Me: Ok (＾▽＾) Don't be afraid to tell me if you’re not up for it once the day rolls around, ok?

😇🩷🌸Haruka-chan🌸🩷😇: ok

Sunday, 30 November 2014

Akiyama spent all of Saturday cleaning his apartment again. Wiping down countertops, dusting tables, vacuuming floors, scrubbing the bathrooms, changing the bed sheets. Sunday morning, he went shopping—flowers, a card, and a box of condoms. He hadn’t done that in years. Hana had been on birth control since before they even met, it might’ve been a decade since he bought any, if not more. Sure, he was still in his mid-20s a decade ago, while Haruka-chan was only about to turn 8, still living in an orphanage, not even having met Kiryu-san for another year, but he felt like a teenager again buying those. Not that he got much action in high school, he was a bit of a 'late bloomer', but still.

He hesitated at which checkout line to go to. He always went to the manned cash register, but buying condoms felt so risqué, he was almost embarrassed for other people to know he was buying them. But he was intimidated by the self-checkout. It made so many noises, and the machine read out the name of the item you were purchasing (“One box of condoms, ¥800”), and then half the time a cashier would have to come help with the machine anyway!

He stared at his wallet the entire time the cashier was scanning and bagging his items.

“¥2297. Do you have a point card with us?”

“No.”

“Would you like to sign up—”

“No.”

“Ok, cash or ca—?”

“Cash.”

He glanced at the screen on the cash register. It listed the items he was purchasing. 

'Condoms, box, Okamoto 0.01 Zero One Large Size 3 pc — ¥800'

He had agonized about the brand, the length, the width of the rubber, whatever gimmick the brand had (Rilakuma? Really?), so he just went with what he remembered buying back in the day. It probably didn’t matter that much in the end, but everything had to be perfect. There was still the possibility she wouldn’t want to, and he was fine with that. But if she did, he needed to make sure her first time was the best first time anyone could have. And hopefully, there will be a second and a third time, and more.

He was still conflicted about being her first though. He was a grown man with more experience than she could possibly have, almost as many years of experience as she was alive. Wouldn’t it be fairer for her first time to be with someone her own age who had as little experience as she did? Akiyama liked to think that he was adept when it came to bedroom affairs. His ex-wife seemed to think so, and she wasn’t the kind of woman to mince words. After him, would any other person meet her expectations?

Unless I’m both her first and her last.

I wouldn’t mind if she were my last.

“Oh, Akiyama-sensei, fancy seeing you here.” Akiyama’s muscles exited his skin as he turned and saw one of his students standing beside him at the cash register, waiting her turn.

“AH! A-amon-san! Greetings! Doing some grocery shopping!?” he said much too loudly, shifting his body to hide any evidence of what he was purchasing, going so far as to lean well-across the counter, shielding his see-through plastic bag with his body. Somehow, this only made his student more curious about what he just bought. She started to look in the direction he was hiding, and he slid even further to continue blocking her view. She suddenly stood up and leaned back, and before Akiyama could move to block her view, her eyes widened. She put a hand to her mouth and turned around as she attempted to stifle a laugh. No coming back from this. He shoved the cash into the cashier’s hand, told him to keep the change, yanked the receipt from the cashier’s hand and grabbed his bag of items at the same time, quickly uttering a farewell of sorts, and powerwalking to his car. His heart didn’t slow down until he got home.

Chapter Text

The nervous energy from his encounter at the store earlier, along with the excitement of seeing Haruka-chan, only made Akiyama more restless. He did some last-minute tidying, confirmed his reservations, and packed his clothes for the evening in his trunk.

He picked her up at her place, parking around the corner. It had been months since they had even done this much. It felt so comfortable. She rounded the corner, and he hopped out immediately to greet her. Her lips collided with his before he even had a chance to wish her an early happy birthday, and he pulled her in close as she wrapped her arms around his neck. She opened her mouth and forced her tongue in his, and he gladly reciprocated. He had to be the one to pull away and catch his breath, he wasn’t prepared at all for that.

“Hi,” he said, slightly bewildered, still in shock about her demeanor these past few days. He hadn’t seen her like this in months. Did she start going to therapy again? Start taking some medication? Get sober? She hadn’t told him a thing but seeing her like this was more than enough.

“Hi,” she said with a beaming smile. “Let’s go!”

He took her to Le Marche again for a new dress and accessories. The clothes he bought her the year before were still in his closet, and she had worn them a few times since then, but only at his place. They found another red dress, the fabric a pleated tulle with a V-neck and a black belt at the waist. It also had long sleeves and went down to her knees. Haruka-chan was only interested in dresses that had sleeves and were longer than last year's dress. And Akiyama was glad for it—he wouldn’t be able to see any of her scars. He bought her a necklace of black pearls with a matching bracelet, along with some black Mary Jane shoes with a low heel.

He took her to the same salon he took her to last year and requested the updo again. While she was getting done up, he returned to Le Marche where they let him use their fitting rooms to change from his casual daytime attire to his outfit for the evening. He was a usual customer of theirs, they had no reason to deny him. He wore the same black suit jacket, black button-up, and red tie that matched her dress—such a pity that men’s clothes weren’t as varied as women’s at most clothing stores. But tonight was about her, she was the one to shine.

They went to a different restaurant than last year, an Italian place that was more intimate, with softer lighting and fewer tables. It wasn’t as fancy or expensive, but he didn’t feel the need to impress her as much this time. They weren’t even properly a couple yet back then. This time it was about romance. They had a private little booth with candles and large plants surrounding them, hiding them from everyone. It was like they were in their own little sanctuary. They sat next to each other on the cushioned bench and quietly talked as they shared their food. While he preferred not to, he gave in and bought her some wine. She might have already had something earlier, and he wanted to avoid a fight at all costs tonight.

She was smiling so much. That smile was just gorgeous. He frequently would just stare at her, caress her shoulder and arm, cup her cheek, kiss her forehead. He was so in love with her, it was driving him mad.

“What?” she asked with a smile.

“What?”

“You’ve hardly touched your food, you’ve only been paying attention to me all evening.”

“Of course. I hardly get to see you like this. I missed you.”

She leaned in and kissed him softly on his lips before resting her head on his shoulder.

“Tired? Wouldn’t be surprised if you were starting to crash after how you’ve been these past few days.” She breathed a heavy sigh.

“No, I’ll be fine. I don’t need to keep this up for much longer anyway,” she said, more to herself than to him.

“What do you mean?”

“Nothing, don’t worry about it.”

“If you say so. Dessert?”

☆☆☆

After a satisfying meal, they drove back to his place with no preamble.

“I hope you’re not too full,” he told her as he walked her up the stairs, hand in hand.

“For what?” she asked as he opened his front door. He answered her with a kiss, a deep, passionate one that they didn’t break after he closed the door. They quickly took off their shoes, and their lips met again. He wrapped his arms around her waist and lifted her off the floor, and she giggled into him. Her hands dug through his hair, and one of his hands played with her hair as his other arm stayed firmly around her waist. She moaned into him, and he moaned in return. His cock started to harden, and he hoped his preparations would not be for nothing. 

Between kisses, he tentatively asked, “Want to go to the bedroom?” She nodded, and he carried her over, laying her down on his bed before stepping back. The only light he turned on was his bedside lamp.

“What?” she asked, propping herself up by her elbows.

“Are you going to be ok? If I’m on top of you, I mean.”

“I’m prepared.”

“Ok.” He stayed standing a couple of feet away from her.

“Akiyama-san?” she said softly. He walked slowly over to her and kneeled on the floor beside the bed, looking straight at her.

“There’s… something I’ve been wanting to do. We don’t have to, and it’s ok if you don’t want to, but…” He struggled to complete his sentence. How was he so timid now that asking her for sex was like staring at the summit of Mount Everest? She rolled on her side and put her hand to his face.

“I think I know what you’re asking. And the answer is yes.” His eyes widened, and his cock hardened even more. He gingerly moved his hand to her face and cupped her cheek before moving in for a lighter, chaste kiss. It felt like the very first kiss the two of them shared two summers ago in the garden. And this would be one of the very last they shared before…

She returned the kiss, and for a few moments, they simply stayed in place, him kneeling before her, her lying in wait. Soon, though, she sat up and he removed his jacket. They shared another gentle kiss before she removed his tie and helped him unbutton his shirt. As she did, he removed his pendant necklace—his necklace that still had her Sagittarius charm on it that he never took off. He still hadn't returned her bracelet and necklace to her. He would afterwards.

“You might want to take some of those pins out of your hair,” he told her as he shrugged off his button-up. She did so, and soon her hair was resting over her shoulders, slightly curled from the hairstyle it was no longer in. She held the hem of his undershirt and pulled it upward over his head, his bare torso now exposed. He brought his hands to her face and stroked her cheek with his thumb as he stared at those beautiful brown eyes. She smiled, and he brought his hand to the zipper on the back of her dress. She leaned forward into him as he pulled the zipper gently all the way down her back. He grasped the shoulders of her dress and pulled it slowly down. He could only stare at his hands as he did so, unworthy of taking in her form. As he continued to lower the top half of the dress, she stood while tugging on the ends of the sleeves.

The dress dropped from her body, and he looked up at her. A matching set of bra and panties. She must have known this was where the night was going. The scars and cuts of various lengths, depths, and ages were all visible now, no longer hidden by the dress as red as her blood, and a lump built in his throat from looking at them.

“Akiyama-san?” she broke his spell with.

“You're so beautiful,” he said, bringing his hands to her torso and gently caressing her soft skin. He stood up, and, without asking, she lowered herself to her knees and started unbuckling his belt. “I want to focus on you tonight,” he said, putting his hand on the top of her head. “Besides, I want to make sure I last as long as possible, and this won't help with that,” he said with a soft smile. She stood back up but continued to undo his buckle and pants, kissing him while she did. His pants dropped to the floor, and he carefully stepped out of them, leaving his boxers on for now, and folded them up before laying them with the rest of their clothes. 

She scooted back onto the bed, sitting up on the side. He brought his hands to her face and tenderly kissed her again before gently pushing her back and returning to his knees. He slowly slipped her panties off and rested her legs on his shoulders, gently kissing her inner thigh and slowly working his hand on her clit. She laid back completely and moaned, and he moved his mouth to her clit, slowly circling his tongue on her. He wanted them both to enjoy this night, this special night, and he wanted her to get as much pleasure out of it as possible. 

She placed her hand on his head, and he slightly increased his speed, applying a bit more pressure with his tongue. She moaned again, and he licked his finger before inserting it into her. She gasped, and he inserted a second, continuing to work on her clit with his tongue. Her breath became heavier, and he grasped her breast over her bra. He hadn't made her cum in so long, he had been yearning to see her writhe again. She started to push on his head and pull on his hair, and her legs started to clamp around him. He stopped and stood before leaning over her to speak into her ear.

“Not yet, angel. I want to make you beg for it.” She looked up at him, lust deep in her eyes, panting and squeezing her legs shut. He took her hand, sat her up, and wrapped his arms around her to find the clasp of her bra. He could never understand why guys always complained about struggling to take off a girl’s bra—it was something she did every day, it wasn’t difficult to learn. He unclasped her bra and removed it in one clean motion.

She was now completely naked in front of him for only the second time in his life. He stared in awe at her beautiful form. She started to shrink under his intense gaze, and he put his hand on her cheek. “Hey, don't be ashamed. You're stunning, inside and out.” To make it fair, he stood up straight and moved his hands to the elastic waistband of his boxers. He hooked his thumbs around it and looked at her with his eyebrows raised. She nodded, and he lowered his boxers, setting his cock free. Now it was his turn to feel embarrassed. 

He liked to think that his physique would be to her liking—he worked out enough to stay fit and toned, and he had caught her staring at him plenty of times. But being completely naked was something else entirely. He watched her eyes move over his body and did his best not to appear as embarrassed as he was. She stood up and raised herself on her toes to kiss him. She smiled up at him after, and he smiled back. He cocked his head to the bed and said, “Go on, lay down.” She complied and he followed, lying next to her. He still wanted to be careful about being on top of her. 

He kissed her again and returned his hand to her clit. She was so wet, he felt he was going to explode. She returned the kiss and wrapped her arms around his neck, pulling him to her. His chest was over her, but he kept his legs and hips to her side still. His cock was resting on her thigh, and his pre-cum started to dirty her. He continued working on her clit with his hand, and she started to buck her hips against him. When she started to moan, he released his hand from her again. He put his mouth to her ear and whispered, “I don't hear you begging yet. Looks like you're not ready to cum still.” She whimpered a little but otherwise stayed quiet. 

He shifted and propped himself up on his elbow, staring at her. “Are you ready?” She nodded, and he got up to grab the box of condoms from his dresser. He had to remind himself how to put one on and didn't turn to face her until it was completely on. He was glad to get the large size. He turned to face her and asked, “Can I be on top of you?” She nodded and he walked over to her. He gave her a kiss on the forehead before climbing onto the bed and kneeling before her. He carefully put his hands on her legs and spread them open. He held his cock at the base of the shaft but didn't move.

“What's wrong, Akiyama-san?”

“I don't want to hurt you. I don't want you to regret this. I—”

“Akiyama-san,” she interrupted. He met her eyes, and the look she gave was indescribable. Some mix of lust, courage, want, tenderness, love.

“Ok.” He wrapped his arms under her legs and pulled her body closer. He rested his cock on top of her, where it would soon lay within her.

This'll be a bit of a tight fit.

He thrust his hips over her so his cock rubbed against her clit, grasping it at the base of the shaft to be able to push it against her. 

He was stalling.

He was terrified.

He leaned forward to rest one hand by her head, the other still grasping his cock. He lowered himself to slightly rest on top of her, and she shifted her legs to give him room. He rested on his elbow and looked her in the eye.

“You can still say no.”

“Please.”

He gave her one final kiss and placed the tip of his cock at her entrance. Already he could feel her warmth, and he groaned a little. He gently pushed himself inside, stopping halfway and looking at her again. She was so wet, he was having little trouble moving, but she was so much smaller than him, she was still a bit tight, and he wanted to make sure he wasn't hurting her. But she felt fucking amazing. She nodded, and he rested his head at the crook of her neck as he pushed the rest of himself inside her.

“Oh my god,” he whispered into her neck. There he stayed, completely undone by the feel of her engulfing him. Despite her tightness, it felt like a perfect fit, like something had finally clicked into place. “I’m going to start moving now, ok?” She nodded, and he pushed his arms under her, tenderly wrapped them around her, pressing himself just a little bit more onto her. She wrapped her arms around his neck, and he slowly pulled his hips back before pushing inside her again. “Fuck,” he breathed out, and she moaned in response.

He was almost regretting getting the thinnest condom on the market—he could feel her so completely, her warmth, her tightness. He wasn’t sure how long he’d last after not fucking for over a year. He should’ve masturbated earlier. He felt her chest heave, and he shot his head up to look at her. She covered her mouth with her hands as tears welled in her eyes. “Oh my god, Haruka-chan, what—” He started to remove himself but she shook her head.

“I’m just so happy,” she whimpered out. He sighed and brought himself back on her and inside her, and rested his forehead on hers, placing his hand to her cheek and stroking it with his thumb. Her shoulders continued to shake as tears started to flow freely. He felt his eyes start to prick with tears too. “I’m so happy, I could die,” she said more quietly. 

“Oh, angel,” he said. He wiped the tears from her face and tried to blink his own tears away. She was so special to him. He took her hand in his, interlocking their fingers as he continued to thrust gently into her, her hair beautifully spreading out on his pillow. But Haruka-chan was impatient. She wrapped her legs around his waist and tilted her hips so he could reach farther inside her. He moved a hand to her hip as support as he thrust a little faster and a little harder, and involuntary groans left his throat. 

He stopped in place, bringing himself back down—he almost came right then. He kissed her deeply before sitting up and wrapping his arms under her legs again and pushing them back to rest himself on the back of her thighs. From there, he could look at her while he pounded into her, defiled her. She rested her forearms on her face, her mouth spreading in pleasure. He continued to thrust into her, even faster and harder, the sound of their bodies together filling the room, the bed swaying in rhythm with his thrusts. His hair was falling out of place, strands hanging down over his face, sweat pooling at his brow. He almost lost himself completely and had to stop to prevent himself again from cumming. He panted and rolled off of her before coaxing her to get on top of him.

“Sit on my face first,” he demanded. She positioned herself just so and rested her hands on the headboard. “God, what a view,” he said, looking up at her. He grasped her waist and pulled her down so she was properly on him and dove in, wasting no time in devouring her. This was the perfect position for her to buck her hips against him, his tongue, his lips. And she tasted amazing. He looked up at her and saw her hands grasping the headboard as she rested her head low, eyes closed with a face of pure pleasure. She started to thrust against him faster, biting her finger and almost squeaking. Suddenly, she stopped and moved backward. He looked up at her with confusion and she lowered herself to kiss him. 

“I’m not ready to cum quite yet, sensei,” she breathed into his ear. He growled a little and she sat back up. He coaxed her hips farther back.

“Lift yourself up,” he said. She complied, and he grabbed his cock and made it stand at attention. “Go on,” he said, and she slowly lowered herself onto him. “Oh, fuck,” he said, rolling his eyes back and then squeezing them shut.

“Do you want me to move up and down?” she asked. Such an innocent way of asking him. All he could do was nod hastily, eyes still forced shut. She placed her palms on his chest and clumsily attempted to lift her hips up before carefully lowering herself on him again. He breathed out with a shudder, and she lifted her hips again with a little more confidence before pounding her hips onto him. His mouth hung agape from the amazing hit, the head of his cock slamming on the base of her womb, and he heard her giggle. He opened his eyes and looked up at her. God, she was beautiful. A divine creation. She started up again, moving with more speed and force now.

“You really do… pick things up… quickly,” he forced out. He remembered saying something similar the first time she gave him a handjob, and it was true.

“You should know by now, sensei,” she responded, glee clear in her voice. She slowed down, her legs tiring from how forcefully she was pounding on him. He grasped her waist and lifted her.

“Stay there,” he said and started rapidly slamming his cock up into her. She tilted her head back, grabbing his wrists to keep herself in place. He looked down at where they met. God, it was so hot watching his cock move in and out of her like this. He stopped and slammed her hips down onto him, already out of breath. 

He flipped them back over and started going down on her again. “You think you’re ready to cum now?” he asked against her. She didn’t say anything, and he returned to her clit, licking her up and down. She was starting to dry out a little from the friction of the condom against her. He didn’t think to bring his lube with him when he moved out, and he didn’t think to buy any either. He would have to make her cum, make her beg to cum, to get her properly wet again. He was going to have to buy some toys for her in the future, his tongue was getting tired. 

He lifted himself and brought his lips to hers again. “You taste so good, baby,” he said against her tongue as his fingers continued to rub against her. With all the buildup she’d had during this evening, she was quicker to get there. He was scared that after all the stimulation, she would be less receptive, her body less willing to succumb to the titillation. He was glad his fears were unfounded. She began to writhe against his hand once more, and this time he didn’t stop. “Want me to keep going?” he asked. She nodded with a moan. “I don’t know, that still doesn’t sound like you want it that bad.” He continued to rub his fingers against her, fully intending on letting her cum anyway.

“Please,” she gasped out.

“‘Please’ what?”

“Please let me cum, sensei!” she almost yelled out. Akiyama briefly remembered that he had neighbors in this apartment building, shared walls with them. How much could they hear? Did they know he was fucking his student, his girlfriend who still wasn’t yet 18? It was so different from when he had a house. 

Maybe I should go house hunting. Maybe I’ll bring her along.

He realized he was getting distracted and refocused on her. 

“Ok, cum for me,” he said, and her legs clamped together around him as she brought her arms over her face again, her unbelievably sexy moans echoing through his bedroom. He felt juices pooling onto his hand, rolling down her and onto the bed. He had forgotten she could squirt like that if he worked her up enough. God, that was hot. He pressed his lips to hers, quieting her, and she dove her tongue into him, keeping him close as she was on the comedown. She stopped, needing to catch her breath. He rested his forehead on hers. “Did you like that?” he asked, and she barely nodded.

“Your turn,” she eventually breathed out.

“I’m not going to hold back this time.”

“I don’t want you to.” He growled and sat back up before pushing her legs apart again and yanking her towards him. She was so wet from her orgasm, and he had no issue thrusting into her. He pushed her legs up and towards her and rested himself against the back of her thighs again. 

“I’m not stretching your legs too much, am I?” She shook her head no. “Perfect.” He looked her in the eye as he began to thrust again. He still held back a little at the start, still terrified that at any moment she would shatter from his touch. But soon he released all inhibitions and slammed hard and fast into her. It was like an animal had taken over him. He closed his eyes as pleasure washed over him, and a guttural moan involuntarily escaped his throat.

Even though he was wearing a condom, he still moved to cum outside of her, but at some point, while he was in heaven, she wrapped her legs around his hips, firmly keeping him locked in her. He couldn’t stop himself in time, and he released everything he had into her. “Oh, fuuuuuck…” he moaned out. He was ready to collapse onto her but had the wherewithal to gently lower himself, put most of his weight on his elbow beside her, and hang his head into her neck. He felt his hair sticking to him from the sweat, and brushed it out of his face, splashing a little sweat onto her. “Sorry.” She shook her head. 

He brought himself back up to remove himself from her—he came quite a lot, and he thought he could feel it start to leak at the base. The last thing either of them needed was her getting pregnant. He wrapped his fingers around the base of his shaft, keeping the condom in place as he slowly removed himself. He shuddered a little as he watched himself exit her one last time, his cum so close to her. He thought about the conversation they had so long ago at the patisserie, when she said she wanted to be a mom, he said he wanted to be a dad. 

“I’ll be right back, just gonna clean up real quick,” he said, giving her another deep kiss before standing up and walking to the bathroom to throw out the condom and rinse his cock off. When he returned, he said to her, “You should go pee, helps prevent UTIs.” She raised an eyebrow but still got up to do so. They were both standing in the warm light of the bedside lamp, and a wave of pure joy washed over him. 

We did it. We finally did it. And she looks so radiant.

He kissed her forehead, and she continued to walk to the bathroom. He quickly turned and gave her a hard smack on the ass, leaving a red mark. She yelped and placed a hand where he smacked her, looking at him incredulously. He growled at her, and she walked away smiling.

When she returned, he was sitting up on the edge of the bed waiting for her. If he laid down, he feared he would fall asleep. He reached a hand out to her, and she took it as she walked towards him.

“Hi,” he said, lazily wrapping his arms around her waist.

“Hi,” she responded, resting her hands on his shoulders.

“What did you think?”

“I can’t believe I waited so long.” They shared a tender kiss, and he wrapped his arms around her, pulling her in close.

“Want to cuddle for a bit?” She nodded. He laid himself down on the bed, and she crawled over him and rested herself on him. “Mind if I have a smoke?” he asked her. Part of him believed she’d repeat what she said to him in his car during the first week of her first year of high school when he was driving her home in the storm after Majima-san destroyed Saejima-san’s face.

‘Are you really going to smoke inside your car without even a window open while a minor is sitting next to you?’ she had said. Today was the last day she could say something like that, after all.

“Do people really do that? It’s not just a thing in movies?” she asked instead. He chuckled.

“Just wanted to see how you’d react. I can wait to smoke until later. Oh, wait, I need to give you something,” he said and scooted himself up a little. He opened the small box next to his bedside lamp and pulled out two items—her necklace and bracelet. “Sorry it took me so long to get these back to you. I didn’t get many chances to even see you, and when I did I either didn’t have them with me or got so excited that I forgot.” He passed them to her and asked if she needed help putting them on. She looked sad for a moment. “What’s wrong?” A tear rolled from her eye onto his chest. “Angel, what’s the matter?” he asked, putting the bracelet and necklace back on his bedside table.

“I don’t deserve you.”

“Nonsense, if anything, I don’t deserve you.”

“You’re right. You deserve someone better.”

“Stop talking like that. I don’t like when you talk about yourself like that.”

“But it’s true—”

“No, it’s not.” He turned his body to face her properly and held her face, forcing her to look at him. “Haruka-chan. Please. Listen to me. You have been the best thing in my life. I’m so happy when I’m with you… I… I… I lo—” Her phone started ringing. He sighed and collapsed onto the bed, and she sat up to reach for it. It was her second phone. The one he bought her. No one else should be calling her than him. “Who’s calling you?”

“Hm? Looks like a scam call,” she said, silencing the phone and laying it face down. He looked at her, suspicious.

“Didn't look like a phone number on that screen. Looked like a name.”

“Ugh, it's no one, Akiyama-san.” He sat up further.

“How many other people have that number?”

“Are you really going to fight with me right after taking my virginity?”

“I will if something like that happens. Someone calls your second phone this late at night? Is it one of your drinking buddies or something? Or are they asking for something else?” She sat up now, anger on her face.

“What are you implying, Akiyama-san!?” He just stared at her. “Oh my god, you're being ridiculous! Do you really think I'm… cheating on you or something!?”

“I don't know.”

“Well, I'm not! Just because someone calls me doesn't mean I'm doing anything with them.”

“Just tell me who it was.” She hesitated for way too long. “Haruka-chan.”

“Fine! I texted my buyers that I won't be contacting them anymore, and some of them aren't taking it so well. Happy!?” He stared at her, stunned.

“Does that mean… you're trying to quit?”

“I don't think I'll be drinking anything after tomorrow,” she said, lowering her head. Of course. People like picking important days to make big changes. And your 18th birthday is a big one for a lot of people. Akiyama brought her close and wrapped her tightly in his arms.

“Angel, I'm so proud of you. I'll support you every step of the way, ok?” She hesitated a moment before returning the hug, not as tightly. She released him and looked at the clock on his bedside table.

“It's getting late. I should get going.” The moment had passed. But the joy spreading within him from this news was the next best thing.

“Ok, go ahead and shower.”

☆☆☆

Mayflower's blog:

Entry #69

we did it

A & i finally did it

im glad i got 2 do it & tht it wuz wit him

i wuz gettin scared tht i nevr would or tht 1 of my byers would end up bein my 1st instead

theyve gotten so demandin lately

tmrw i turn 18

ill do smth small wit my dad & a cuple of family frends

then evrything will b in order

ill hav done everthing i wanted & needed 2 do

c u tmrw

Chapter Text

Monday, 01 December 2014

💖: It’s midnight. Happy birthday, angel (/^-^(^ ^*)/ ♡

☆☆☆

When Haruka and Akiyama-sensei locked eyes as she entered the classroom, it was like time froze. The night before, just a few hours ago, they had sex with each other for the first time. She had sex for the first time, period. They were as close to each other as two people could possibly be. She had spent the rest of the night and her entire morning thinking about it. About him. About what they’d finally done. How he felt being inside her. The way he carefully thrust himself into her. The way he slammed his hard cock into her. How he came inside her, even with a condom. She considered asking him not to use one, any consequences wouldn’t matter. Let herself live the fantasy of becoming a mother like she dreamed of, let him live the fantasy of becoming a father he had foregone for so long. She had read that it felt better for men without a condom too. But she knew he would ask questions if not flat-out refuse.

“Good morning, Sawamura-san,” he finally said.

“Good morning, sensei.” She walked to her desk, not daring to look at him until she sat down and could casually face the front. Really, nothing was stopping her from acting how she wanted. Hell, she could go right up to him and kiss him in front of the whole class. It wouldn’t matter after tonight. But there would still be consequences for him. Likely, he’d get fired, stories would circulate about the teacher who was dating his, until today, underage student, he would probably never get another job. Who knew how much that could even affect Sky Finance and Elise? He’d probably still be able to day-trade, but still. No, he didn’t deserve that. She wasn’t going to put him through that just because of her selfishness. She was already acting extremely selfishly.

Not far behind her, Akari-chan entered the classroom. She greeted Akiyama-sensei as always and looked at Haruka, before looking between the two a couple of more times. She walked over to her desk, wishing Haruka a happy birthday as she walked past, a cheeky smile on her face. For the life of her, Haruka couldn’t quite figure out why Akari-chan was acting like that. She did post on her blog last night about doing it with ‘A’, but it’s not like she read her blog or anything, right? Were they that bad at hiding the fact that they reached the final frontier? Her classmates' comments and teasing throughout the morning were the same as they always were, and they would definitely escalate ten-fold if everyone could tell they had actually slept together.

Even during lunch, her three friends acted like they knew something. No way all three of them had found and were reading her blog, right? How would they figure out it was her, anyway? She never put her name to it, and she kept enough details out.

Kasuga-sensei wished her a happy birthday, as did the other staff who knew her whenever they happened to cross paths. Except Akiyama-sensei, of course. She had also woken up to texts of well-wishes from all of the orphans.

When she opened her shoe locker at the end of the school day, there was a note inside. She wasn’t surprised to see it was from Akiyama-sensei. He probably snuck it in during the day in case someone tried to leave another mean note in the morning and would find his note instead. She just stuffed it in her bag—she didn’t have the time to stop in the bathroom and read it, she needed to get home to Ojisan. It probably wouldn’t do her any good to read it anyway. 

When she got home, Ojisan was waiting for her with a cake he bought from the local patisserie. A light white cake with airy vanilla icing and fresh strawberries.

“Happy birthday, Haruka. Majima-no-nii-san is on his way with some sushi from Sushi Gin. Daigo and Nishiki are on their way too.”

“Ojisan,” she said with a soft smile. “Thank you.” She walked up to him and gave him a tight hug. He returned the hug, and she didn’t let go for several seconds.

“Hey, everything ok?” he asked. She looked up at him and simply nodded. 

Not long after, there was an excited knock on the door. Haruka jumped up and ran to it, eager to take advantage of the opportunity to see the men who meant so much to her.

“Haruka-chan! Happy birthday!” Majima-san shouted, lifting her off the ground and giving her a spin. She laughed with her whole chest, and he didn’t let her go until he reached the little living room. “Kiryu-chan!” He ran to Ojisan, who was now standing, and attempted to do the same to him. Ojisan stayed put on the ground, tensing his muscles to make himself heavy. Majima-san still kept a firm hold on his waist regardless.

“Happy birthday, Haruka-chan!” She returned to the door and found both Nishiki and Daigo-nii-san, Nishiki holding the sushi that Majima-san bought. She greeted them with a smile as she approached them and attempted to take the sushi from Nishiki’s hands. “Ah ah ah, you’re the birthday girl,” he said, raising the platter above his head, out of her reach. She groaned and led them to the little living room, Majima-san still affectionately holding onto Ojisan.

“They gave that to me for free when I told ‘em it was for your birthday,” Majima-san said as Nishiki rested the platter on the little table.

“You should’ve paid for it anyway,” Nishiki scolded.

“You know how much overhead those guys charge for this shit? They can live without the ¥15,000.”

The sushi was top quality, and no one spoke as they ate, enraptured by the soft rice and silky fish. Between bites, Ojisan noted that she was wearing her bracelet again.

“Oh, it was in the school’s lost-and-found this whole time. I hadn’t even considered looking there until today,” she said, lifting her wrist to look at the charms once more. If Ojisan noticed the ninth charm that came from Akiyama-san, he didn’t say anything about it.

“Oh, well, glad you have it now.” 

“I didn’t know the school had a lost-and-found,” Daigo-nii-san said.

“O-oh, really? I guess it’s mostly just maintained by the students, I don’t even know which teacher is responsible for it.”

The sweet fluffy cake was a perfect cap off to the meal, and Ojisan put on coffee for everyone to sip on as they continued to chat away. As the conversation flowed from one topic to the next, Haruka more and more frequently checked the time on her phone.

“Waitin’ on a text from a boy, Haruka-chan?” Majima-san asked after what was probably the dozenth time she checked her phone.

“Hm? Oh, no, uh, a new season of anime started today, and my friends keep texting our group chat about some new shows.”

“Bet you got a text from someone at midnight, though, huh?” Haruka turned red—how could he possibly know there was someone in her life who cared enough about her to do something like that?

“Y-yeah, a couple of the orphans stayed up late to text me. Ayako is 16 now, staying up late is nothing for her.” Majima-san squinted his eye for the briefest of moments before nodding. It was then that Ojisan also finally checked the time.

“I guess it is getting a little late,” he said, standing. He walked to their bedroom as Haruka began tidying up. Majima-san slapped her hand.

“No! Bad girl! It’s your birthday,” he said, gathering everyone’s plates as Nishiki packed away the cake and sushi to take to the fridge. Daigo-nii-san, unsure of what to do, started grabbing people’s coffee mugs, but none of the mugs were empty. He laughed awkwardly, stayed sitting, and looked at Haruka. They both nodded at each other.

Mercifully, Ojisan finished rummaging in his closet and was walking back out to the living room, a little wrapped box in hand. He passed it to her and sat down, eagerly awaiting her reaction. Once everyone returned to the little table, she tore off the wrapping paper, seeing no reason to be more careful so she could save it for future use. It was a black felt box, and inside was a brooch shaped like a branch of sakura flowers, tiny pink and green gems making up the petals and leaves. She stared at it in shock.

“Ojisan—”

“It reminded me of you as soon as I saw it. I thought you might pin it to your straw hat, or make a hair clip out of it or something. You like it?” She nodded, putting a hand to her mouth. “Don’t worry about the cost either. These three chipped in to pay for it, so it’s a gift from all of us,” he said, looking at the three other men sitting with them, cramped together at the little table. Haruka suppressed a sob. There were so many kind and caring people in her life. It wasn’t fair for them to care so much about someone as worthless as her. She was starting to get cold feet.

“It’s beautiful. Thank you, everyone.” She stood and gave each of them a firm, tender hug. “Thank you for the food and cake too.”  

“Anything for you, Haruka,” Ojisan said, and the other men agreed.

Daigo-nii-san slapped his thighs with his hands and said, “Well, I think it’s time for us to get going.” Everyone stood and wished Haruka a final ‘happy birthday’ as they trickled out of the apartment, the place suddenly becoming silent again. She hoped Ojisan would be able to get used to the silence.

“I’m going to go get ready for bed, take a bath and stuff.”

“Ok, Haruka. Happy birthday,” he said again. She gave him one more hug and a kiss on his cheek.

“I love you.”

“I love you too,” he said, a little confused. She walked over to their bedroom and started preparing.

Chapter Text

Mayflower's blog:

Entry #70

this is my last post

good bye

Chapter Text

Haruka left her note folded up on her shelf next to her photo of the kids from the orphanage. To make it a little easier, she pulled out one of her bottles from her closet and started drinking. Not quite chugging—she never got over the burn of some of these super cheap bottles—but she didn’t take her time between sips either. She removed her necklace and placed it next to her note but kept her bracelet on. She placed her new brooch next to her note too. Such a shame that they spent so much money on something she’d never wear. She was so selfish.

She hid her second phone in her closet, deleting everything off of it except the photos of the special memories she had with Akiyama-san. If he found it, he at least would have those. She didn’t want him or Ojisan to see anything else that was on it.

It was taking her longer than expected to set everything up. She forgot how much she had to drink to feel properly drunk these days. She didn’t have enough time to get drunk enough last night, and her nightmares had returned again. Just further proof that this was the better option. Making plans made these past few days much more tolerable, but only because those days would be temporary.

Once she was satisfied with her level of intoxication, she wrote her final blog post, grabbed a white summer dress from her closet and a cup of cheap sake, and walked to the bathroom.

Ojisan was watching another one of his old samurai movies. She briefly looked over at him, and he stayed staring at the TV, not even noticing she was standing there. She felt bad for what she was about to do to him. But continuing on as she was was still much worse.

She entered the bathroom, turned on the light and the fan, made sure the window and curtains were closed, and turned on the water for the tub. She wanted the water to be nice and warm, and let it run for a bit before plugging the tub. She undressed and folded her clothes, laying them in a neat pile by the door. She did one final look at each charm on her bracelet, ending on the Gemini charm from Akiyama-san. She considered sending text messages to all the orphans, but that would just hurt them more. And the water was starting to rise. Her note should be enough.

She put on her dress, not wanting to be found naked—it would just be one more humiliation to Ojisan. And white was fitting, considering what she and Akiyama-san had done the night before. She was allowed to view it as a sort of marriage, a joining of the two of them. She wouldn’t get the opportunity to say ‘I do’ now, so she let herself consider the man she loved to be her husband for a day, even if he didn’t think of it that way, think of her that way. Part of her thought he would say those three little words to her after or even during the act. But he didn’t. And she wasn’t going to say it first. It would be more than unfair to do that to him knowing what she had planned. White was the color of clouds, the color of daisies, the color of shrouds. She hoped she would see a bright white light at the end of a tunnel. The water kept rising.

She wasn’t sure if there was an afterlife. If there was, then maybe she’d see her mom again. If reincarnation were real, maybe she’d come back as someone close to one of her companions. A younger sister, a daughter. Or maybe she’d come back as a fish, or a horse, or even a little lizard. But it was just as likely that there was absolute nothingness, like before she was born. Complete non-existence. That wouldn’t be so bad. The water kept rising.

Akiyama-san had some old records in his apartment, including a couple by some British band. Some of it was unbelievably depressing, at least based on the instrumentals and the melancholic crooning of the lead singer. He took the time to translate some of the lyrics of his favorites for her. He never flaunted his near fluency in English, but it made sense as to why he was. He ran two businesses and used to work at a large bank and everything. She remembered he was listening to them when they had that awful fight, and she threw her necklace and bracelet at him. The water kept rising.

Oh, mother, I can feel the soil falling over my head

See, the sea wants to take me

The knife wants to slit me

Do you think you can help me?

She hadn’t quite understood how sad the song was until recently. But there was another that was just as sad to her, one she understood in its simplicity. Maybe the translation had something to do with it. The water kept rising.

Sing me to sleep

And then leave me alone

Don't try to wake me in the morning

'Cause I will be gone

Don't feel bad for me

I want you to know

Deep in the cell of my heart

I really want to go

…

There is another world

There is a better world

Well, there must be

The singer was right. There must be a better world. 

She was stalling. And the water was about to overflow.

She turned the water off and downed the cheap cup sake. It burned just as bad. She dipped her toe in the water, but it was too hot to the touch still. She supposed she could wait a little longer and sat down next to the tub.

She considered listening to some music herself. Something else she wouldn’t be able to do again. But she had hardly listened to anything at all in weeks, she had no idea what she’d listen to now. She left her phone in her bedroom anyway. The water was waiting for her.

She touched the water with her fingers. It was the perfect temperature now. She took a deep breath. She’d be at peace soon. It would all be over. She wouldn’t hurt anymore. She wouldn’t hurt the people she loved anymore.

She stood up. She stopped next to the tub. She breathed in deeply again. She stepped into the tub, the water rising and splashing a little over the edge. Maybe she should drain some of the water so it wouldn’t splash anymore as she got in. She didn't want to leave a mess for Ojisan to have to clean up. She stepped out of the tub, reached down, and pulled the plug, counting down the seconds.

She plugged the drain and stepped back in. No splashing. The water should be low enough that it won’t overflow. She kneeled. It was so warm, like a hug. The water was welcoming her home.

"Come here! Come be with us! You’ll be so much better if you let us take you!" the water told her. She nodded and quietly said the names of the people she cared about one last time.

“Akari-chan. Mai-chan. Azusa-chan. Nishiki. Majima-san. Daigo-nii-san. Reina-san. Ayako. Taichi. Koji. Mitsuo. Riona. Eri. Shiro. Izumi. Mame.

“Akiyama-san.

“Ojisan.

“Mom.”

She took in a breath, held it, and laid down face-first into the water.

Chapter Text

Akari trudged away from the Champion District, leaving Haruka-chan in that seedy underground bar with that creep, hidden away from the sweltering heat and garish light of the summer afternoon. Azusa-chan and Mai-chan followed behind her, hands conjoined. They followed her all the way to her house, ready to debrief each other on who they talked to and what they learned while searching for Haruka-chan. 

“Kind of a dick move on Majima-sensei’s part to tell you to go to where Akiyama-sensei’s ex-wife works,” Azusa-chan said.

“Yeah, maybe. But Akiyama-sensei does still own it, it wasn’t that far of a reach to assume she might’ve been there,” Akari said.

“Hey, what was that about her dad? You said his name wasn’t Sawamura?” Mai-chan asked.

“Oh, right! Yeah, I called him ‘Sawamura-san,’ and he cut me off, saying his name was Kiryu Kazuma.”

“You think he’s not Haruka-chan’s real dad?”

“That would explain why she called him ‘Ojisan’ when we visited her place,” Azusa-chan said.

“Yeah, I thought that was weird. She always says ‘my dad’ whenever she talks about him, though,” Akari said.

“Maybe it’s just simpler for her to say that?” Mai-chan suggested.

“Kiryu, Kiryu, Kiryu…”

“What is it, Azusa-chan?”

“That name, I recognize it from somewhere. We said he’s gotta be yakuza, right? I feel like I remember hearing that name ages ago…” They searched for his name online, maybe there was a news article about some petty jail time or a small crime he did. Based on how he was now, he couldn’t have been that big of a deal.

They couldn’t have been more wrong.

“The Fourth Chairman of The Tojo Clan!?” Akari yelled.

“Ten years in the joint for murdering his patriarch!?” Azusa-chan shouted.

“One of the biggest real estate moguls of the bubble economy!?” Mai-chan exclaimed. The other two looked at her. “What? That’s still unexpected.”

“True. But, like, oh my god? This is Haruka-chan’s dad?” Akari said. They continued to scroll through the search results, finding a myriad of news articles and photos of him, his life, his legacy. “There's Majima-sensei! And Dojima-sensei! And… Kasuga-sensei too! I heard that a lot of the staff were ex-yakuza, but I had no idea they were, like, celebrities of the underworld or something!”

“This is fucking insane! How'd Haruka-chan end up running with this crowd!? You think Kiryu-san kidnapped her and never returned her!?” Azusa-chan asked.

“That can't be right, can it?”

“Well, we didn't think he'd be the legendary Dragon of Dojima, either, but here we are,” Mai-chan said.

When summer break ended, Haruka-chan didn’t show up on time, ever. She would stumble through the classroom door anywhere between the middle of first period and lunch. It was good she was showing up, but still.

When she finally did post something on her blog, it was because she had a fight with Akiyama-sensei. At least Mai-chan was wrong about them breaking up, but at this rate, she might end up being right. She had another fight with him only a week or two later, and this one seemed much worse.

now its my turn 2 nevr get a response 2 my txts

i havent seen him since teh fite

i nevr make it 2 homeroom anymore

i feel awful

i was puting him thru so much

this is teh worst.

& still all i can think abt is getting another drink

i still get awful notes in my locker & insults written on my desk & ppl throwing things @ me

y do i evn bother going 2 skool

Akari felt so powerless about the bullying. How many times could she stand up for her? It’s not like her classmates were threatened by her or anything. At least when she showed up late, that meant she wouldn't be tormented during that free time before or during homeroom. There were still nasty notes and things thrown her way, though.

Then, Haruka-chan started skipping school altogether. Akari was scared something had happened to her, but at least according to her blog, she was just staying home. She wanted her to come back to school, but she didn’t know how to help her friend who was struggling so much. Her blog posts got more and more concerning.

im such a failure

i keep feeling this heaviness in my chest tht keeps me from gettin up 2 do anything

i dont think ive washed my hair in 2 weeks bt im not sure

the sun taunts me

i dont deserve 2 b here

no one deserves 2 b around me

y am i even here?

y am i even alive?

whats the point of any of this at all?

its all so absurd

i feel empty

i feel nothing

nothing matters

got one of my dads razor blades

i can finally feel smth

he deserves sum one better then me anyway

sum one who will love him

sum one who wont take advantage of him

sum one he doesnt need 2 worry abt

A whole month of only knowing what was up with your friend through blog posts like those was not easy. 

Then, one chilly October morning, something was different in the air. Everyone noticed how on edge Akiyama-sensei was acting, pacing back and forth, looking out into the hallway, walking all the way to the stairs, and checking to see who was walking up. Then, Haruka-chan showed up. He must’ve known she was coming, right? He was awful at hiding his feelings. That made it so much worse for Haruka-chan.

“Well, well, well. Teacher’s little pet is back. Where were you? Recovering from an abortion or something?” Amon-san had said. And it didn’t come out of nowhere, either. While Haruka-chan was away, some of the students, led by Amon-san and Hori-san, got a little too obsessed with Akiyama-sensei and Haruka-chan’s relationship, spinning wild stories about the two, constantly noting how depressed he looked.

To be fair, the man kept his heart on his sleeve. Bright pink and bedazzled to the point that anyone could see it. He was constantly staring out the window with a face of melancholy or agony. Sighing heavily throughout the day. Always fiddling with the little charm next to the pendant on his necklace. Hardly focusing on anything, completely zoned out. And then the day that Haruka-chan shows up, he’s all antsy and energetic and smiles for the first time in a month, even watching her as she walks to her desk? What a dumbass. 

Haruka-chan’s blog post that night only confirmed what Akari suspected.

went back 2 skool 2day

it sucked

Obviously. But there was more.

saw A 4 teh 1st time in a month a cuple days ago

he showed up @ my apt out of teh blue & demanded 2 c me 2 my dad

he clamed 2 jst b a homeroom teacher & freind

he snuck in 2 teh bathroom & washed my hair

it felt so nice

he asked me 2 come back 2 skool so i decided 2 try 2day

How was Akiyama-sensei able to act so swoon-worthy? Demanding to see her? Sneaking inside to be with her? Washing her hair? No wonder Haruka-chan put up with his idiocy.

evry1 still rembered teh rumors

A did an awful job hiding his exitement 4 me coming back which didnt help

ppl kept saying mean things 2 me teasing me someone thru a mean note @ my head

i dont think ill b going back tmrw

Aye, there’s the rub. And Haruka-chan stopped showing up again. Akari returned to keeping up with her blog, opening the notification email she received every time she posted as soon as she saw it. Her friend was going downhill, fast. Apparently, she had a therapist at one point, and she even made a house call for her. Why couldn’t Haruka-chan see how many people loved and cared so much for her? It was so frustrating.

Then, a couple of days before her birthday, Haruka-chan suddenly showed up to school, acting as if she didn’t have a care in the world. All bubbly and giggly, she didn’t even care about a single thing her classmates said or did. She still had a vague smell of booze on her breath, but her being at school and looking so happy was enough. 

That Saturday, the four girls even all went out shopping together and got dinner afterward. Haruka-chan was fun to be around again, it was like when they were first years. She even blogged about it afterward, and she seemed so happy then, too.

The next night, Sunday night, Akari got another notification.

we did it

A & i finally did it

im glad i got 2 do it & tht it wuz wit him

i wuz gettin scared tht i nevr would or tht 1 of my byers would end up bein my 1st instead

theyve gotten so demandin lately

tmrw i turn 18

ill do smth small wit my dad & a cuple of family frends

then evrything will b in order

ill hav done everthing i wanted & needed 2 do

Two major bombshells:

1. Haruka-chan was turning 18!? She could’ve sworn she was turning 17. They celebrated her Sweet 16 last year, right? That meant she was actually a year older than all of them!
2. She and Akiyama-sensei ‘did it’? As in… it!? Like, Netflix and Chill, make the beast with two backs, knocking boots kind of ‘it’!?

AkariDances: OMG did you guys see haruka chans last blog post?????

ItsMFnAzusa: wut? no, y?

MaiMelody: im looking now

MaiMelody: OMGGGGGGGGG

ItsMFnAzusa: WHAT!?

AkariDances: grl just read it!!

MaiMelody: omg omg omg

ItsMFnAzusa: OMGGGGGGGGGG

AkariDances: RITE!?

ItsMFnAzusa: ugh i wish haruka chan would just TELL US this shit!!

MaiMelody: hang on shes turning 18??

AkariDances: i noticed tht too!!!

AkariDances: u think she got held back or smth?

MaiMelody: maybe

MaiMelody: i can c y she wouldnt want to tell everyone abt tht

ItsMFnAzusa: STILL

ItsMFnAzusa: i feel like we hardly kno her…

AkariDances: yea i feel u

MaiMelody: and what abt this ‘everything in order’ stuff at the end?

AkariDances: idk

MaiMelody: kinda weird thing to say?

ItsMFnAzusa: eh she says a bunch of weird shit on her blog

MaiMelody: ig…

MaiMelody: i just find it kinda concerning with some of the other stuff shes been talking abt lately

AkariDances: tru

ItsMFnAzusa: have you seen her lately??

ItsMFnAzusa: she was all smiles yesterday

ItsMFnAzusa: been coming to school too

MaiMelody: that doesnt mean shes better

AkariDances: ill keep a close eye on her blog

AkariDances: does tht make u feel better?

MaiMelody: itll do i guess

The next day, Akari couldn’t help but take a close look at the two of them when she entered the classroom. Were they going to act any different? Look at each other differently? Did Haruka-chan have that ‘aura’ or whatever that people talk about getting after losing their virginity? She might’ve been imagining things, but Akari could’ve sworn there was something different about her, about the two of them. Why couldn’t Haruka-chan just talk to her!?

Even during lunch, Akari, Mai-chan, and Azusa-chan all sat around Haruka-chan, not knowing what to say. They tried to ask a couple of vague leading questions, tried to get the slightest hint of anything from her, but she was a closed book. The happy birthday wishes would have to do.

Later that night, Akari got a notification from Haruka-chan’s blog. She promised Mai-chan she’d keep a close eye on it, and she was honestly a little worried, too. As it turned out, she had every right to be.

this is my last post

good bye

Last… post? Goodbye?

Oh.

Oh no.

No no no no no no no no no.

She closed the blog and opened her recent contacts on her phone.

“Mai-chan! Did you see Haruka-chan’s last blog post!? Well, look at it, I’m calling Azusa-chan.”

“Azusa-chan! Did you see Haruka-chan’s last blog post!? I just called Mai-chan about it! Please, look at it and call Mai-chan! I’m going to try to call Haruka-chan!”

The sound of a phone ringing played before going to voicemail. She tried again. Voicemail. Soon, she knew the voicemail recording by heart.

‘Your call has been forwarded to an automated voice messaging system. SAWAMURA HARUKA is not available. The voice mailbox has not been set up yet. Goodbye.’

Goodbye.

Akari wasn’t going to take this. Mai-chan called her.

“Akari-chan, I got you on speaker and Azusa-chan’s with me, did you call Haruka-chan?”

“She’s not answering!” Akari said, tears starting to build in her eyes.

“We gotta get to her place. Where are you?” Azusa-chan asked.

“Home!” Akari said, grabbing her robe to wear over her pajamas. “I’m, like, a whole fifteen-minute walk away! We don’t have that kind of time!”

“Are your parents there? Maybe they can drive you?” Akari heard a door open and close through the speaker, and Azusa vocalizing at the bitter cold air. She ran downstairs.

“Mom! Dad!”

“What, honey, what’s wrong!?” her mom asked, staring at her daughter’s red, puffy face, tears wet on her cheeks.

“I need to get to Haruka-chan’s, now!”

“Is something the matter?” Akari could only nod.

“Ok, let me grab my jacket. I’ll meet you at the car,” her dad said, already standing and trotting to the entranceway. Akari ran outside, jogging in place to keep herself warm, nervous energy coursing through her veins.

“Dad’s driving me. What about you two?” Akari asked into her phone.

“We’re on our way!” Mai-chan said. She could hear them breathing heavily, her voice clipping as her feet pounded against the sidewalk. 

Her dad was outside seconds later, and she hurried him to the car, desperately waving to beckon him over quicker. He was a careful driver, and she was about to ask for her mom to drive instead when he floored it, and they zoomed down the road, hardly braking at any turn, not stopping at any stop sign.

“Careful, Dad!”

“You said Haruka-chan’s in trouble, right? I can’t take my time to get there!” Akari cried more, lifted by her dad’s determination. The tires of the car screeched as they rounded the corner to Haruka-chan’s apartment, and Akari ran out of the car before he even parked. Her dad called out to her, but she didn’t stop running. When she reached her front door, she slammed her fists against it over and over, not stopping until Kiryu-san opened the door.

“Akari? Wha—”

“Where’s Haruka-chan!?”

“She… went to get ready for bed a bit ago. I heard the water running,” he said, pointing his thumb in the direction of their bathroom.

“How long ago was that!?”

“Huh? I don’t know, I’ve been watching a movie. Is everything ok, Akari?” She pushed past him into the apartment, kicking her shoes off halfway down the hall. She shoved the bedroom door open and teared her way through the room. Not in the closet, not on her futon. Her phone was resting by her futon, notifications of missed call after missed call by all three of them on the screen. She ran to the bathroom and jiggled the door handle. Locked. She started pounding on the door. Nothing.

“Haruka-chan! Haruka-chan! Ha-ru-ka-cha-n!” she shouted, pounding on the door even harder. Nothing. “Kiryu-san!”

“What!? What is it!?”

“Break down this door!”

“Huh!? I don’t want to lose our deposit—”

“JUST DO IT!” He hesitated for only a moment, then gave a swift kick to the door at the handle. It flew to the other side of the room. Akari ran in, frantically looking around, when she saw the tub. 

When she saw a body floating in the tub. She screamed.

Chapter Text

There was a bright white light after all. And she felt so comfortable, sitting up on a nicely reclined chair, like Akiyama-san’s. Then she felt the tubes. Then she heard the beeping. Haruka carefully fluttered her eyes open, and she was looking out a large window, the white sun beaming on her face, bright blue cloudless sky greeting her. The Millenium tower stood proudly in the distance.

Even in heaven, that eyesore is here?

She took in a deep breath, and pain shot through her lungs. She coughed, only making it hurt more, when someone opened a curtain on the other side of her.

“Haruka,” a calm, familiar voice said. She did her best to turn her head, realizing just how much of her was covered with tubes and bandages and a whole number of things. After a bit of struggling, she saw him standing by the foot of her bed. She tried to speak, but her throat was filled, and she couldn’t say a coherent word. Ojisan walked over to her and sat on a stool beside her, dark bags heavy under his eyes. She moved her eyes around the rest of the room, but it was all unfamiliar. There was a bedside table with an array of flowers and cards piled high. He followed her gaze and smiled. “You’ve got some great friends, Haruka. They’re the reason you’re here.” She tried to raise a brow under the tape holding something in place on her head. “Your friend Akari suddenly showed up at the apartment and made me break down the bathroom door to get you.”

Get me? From what?

She continued to stare at him.

“They said your memory might be a little foggy, especially because of your… what was it… ‘history of dissociation’. I’ll spare you the details.” Haruka started searching in her mind for what she most recently remembered. She had made plans, preparations. She was in the bathroom. And then she was here. Ojisan placed a hand on hers. “I’ll go get the nurse and let them know you’re awake,” he said, standing up and walking away. She didn’t want him to leave, but she still couldn’t speak, and she was too weak to lift her arms and reach for him. He returned with an older woman in a pink uniform holding a clipboard.

“Sawamura-san, hello, happy to see you awake. Do you know where you are?” Haruka shook her head as best she could. “You’re at Touto University Hospital. It’s Friday, 5 December 2014.” The nurse noticed Haruka’s silent shock. “You’ve been out for a few days. You were in the ICU until last night. I’m going to check your vitals now, ok?” Haruka stayed still, and the nurse checked the monitors beside her bed, writing down whatever it is nurses wrote on their notepads. “Let’s check your responsiveness. I’m going to shine this light in your eyes, ok?” Haruka saw another bright white light. Not the one she wanted, though. The nurse did some other little tests on her before saying, “I’ll let the doctor know how you’re doing. He might come see you later this afternoon.” As the nurse turned to leave, Ojisan stood and tapped her on the shoulder.

“When can you remove some of those tubes from her?”

“Once I complete my report and make sure everything looks normal, I’ll send someone right over, ok?”

“Ok. Thank you.” She bowed and left the room. Ojisan sat right back down next to her. “Want me to get you anything? I have your bag here,” he said, lifting it up from the floor and setting it next to her. “Your friends grabbed it from home and made sure to put all your stuff you might need in it. They’ve been stopping by after school every day. So have Majima-no-nii-san and Nishiki. Daigo and Kasuga-san send their well wishes, too. Oh, I need to call everyone and tell them you’re awake!” Before Haruka could figure out how to protest, Ojisan stood up and started calling people one by one. Nothing about Akiyama-san was mentioned.

Haruka tried to reach for her bag. She was so weak. Like always. She managed to grab the zipper but struggled to pull it open. Ojisan turned as he was on the phone and saw her before walking over and unzipping the bag for her with one hand. He stepped away and continued with his phone calls, and she carefully inspected her bag. 

It was her school bag, and everything she had left in it was still inside—a textbook, some notebooks, a manga she had borrowed from Azusa-chan. She dug a little deeper and found her phone. Dead, of course, but at least they also put her charging cable in her bag. She couldn’t see her second phone anywhere. Probably for the best. Who knew how Ojisan would react if he saw it? In some of the outside pockets were small bottles of skin care and some face pads to wash her face while still in bed. There were also some fresh socks and underwear. She was suddenly realizing how dirty she felt, she hadn’t bathed since…

Oh.

That’s right.

She remembered now.

She tried to drown herself.

A wave of shame and despair washed over her like the deceitful water that did not take her. She slumped back. A tear attempted to roll, but it got caught on one of the many wires and tubes on and around her face.

I can’t even kill myself properly. What am I even good for?

She stared up at the ceiling, the bright white light of the fluorescent ceiling lights beaming into her eyes. This light hurt so much. Ojisan was suddenly sitting beside her again.

“Are you missing anything?” he asked. “I can go home and grab you some stuff if you want.” She kept staring up at the ceiling, simply shaking her head. “Ok,” he said softly. They didn’t have to wait long for another nurse to step into the room.

“Sawamura-san, how are you? Oh, silly me, you can’t answer yet. And that’s why I’m here,” she said and carefully unraveled her, removing tape from her face, tubes from her mouth and nose, wires from her head. “I’m not going to remove everything yet, we still need to monitor some of your vitals. But that’s probably more comfortable now, hm?” she said with a smile. Haruka swallowed, squeezed her eyes shut and opened them, moved her jaw around to stretch out her face.

She nodded and forced out a quiet “Yes”.

“Good, I’m glad. If you need anything from us, the call button is right here,” she said, pointing to a red square button beside the bed.

“Thank you,” Haruka said with a little more ease, and the nurse left.

“Hungry?” Ojisan asked.

“Extremely.” He stood up and left to get her some food, and she was alone with her thoughts again.

There is another world

There is a better world

That can’t be here. No, she was definitely alive and still in her own body. Her own weak, useless, scarred-up body. She found an outlet next to the bedside table and plugged in her phone to charge. She dreaded turning it on and let it sit on the table for a while. Ojisan returned with some water, snacks from the vending machine, and another familiar face.

“Haruka-chan!” Majima-san shouted and dashed over to her, clutching her hands in his.

“Majima-san,” she croaked out.

“You scared the shit outta us, Haruka-chan!” She didn’t respond, didn’t even change her facial expression.

“Give her some time, Majima-no-nii-san.”

“Fine.” He changed the topic, and the three continued conversation, distracting from what had happened, why she was there. After school let out, four more friendly faces showed up at her door.

“Haruka-chan, hi,” Akari-chan said, followed by greetings from Azusa-chan and Mai-chan.

“Hate to do this to you, girl, but we’ve got your schoolwork you need to catch up on,” Azusa-chan said, plopping a stack of paper on the already overly crowded bedside table. Haruka merely sighed. She had hardly even touched what she needed to finish from when she was truant for a month. Nishiki walked in behind them and bid her well wishes, and they chatted some more. But there were now seven people in the little room. Ojisan, Majima-san, and Nishiki soon dismissed themselves so the girls could catch up with each other without the intrusion of old men who probably didn't want to hear what they could possibly gossip about anyway.

“How are you feeling, Haruka-chan? How are you actually feeling?” Akari-chan asked. Haruka couldn’t muster a single word, just stared at her hands on her lap.

“How did you know?” Haruka finally asked.

“Intuition?”

“That’s a load of crap.” The three girls looked at each other, silently communicating about something. Finally, Akari-chan spoke again.

“We’ve kinda been reading your blog.” Haruka’s brows shot up, and she sat up straight.

“What? How did you know it was mine? How’d you even find it?” Akari-chan shrugged her shoulders.

“The algorithm pushed your post on my feed, I guess. But, like, come on, did you really think you were hiding enough details? Everything lined up with you. I sent it to Azusa-chan and Mai-chan, we’ve been keeping up with it. How else were we going to know if our friend was ok or not?” Haruka sighed and slumped back.

“How long?”

“Like, April or May?” she said with trepidation.

“So pretty much the entire time. Great.”

“Hey, don’t be like that! It was fun to read at the beginning! Felt like we were all gossiping with each other again. I mean, the three of us did anyway, but still!”

“I posted so much personal stuff on there…” She put her head in her hands

“And we wanted to make sure you were ok! You really pushed us out of your little bubble, Haruka-chan,” Mai-chan chimed in.

“For real, you really think we didn’t care enough to know about that kind of stuff?” Azusa-chan asked.

“Didn’t want to be a burden—”

“Bullshit, you weren’t, never would’ve been—”

“Ok, let’s change the subject, we don’t need to fight right now,” Akari-chan said. They all took a deep breath together, and the girls told Haruka what happened at school while she was away. At some point, her phone buzzed. The otherwise black screen read ‘100%’. She stared at it, still scared to turn it on.

“Have you talked to Akiyama-sensei?” Akari-chan asked softly, even though no one else was in the room. Haruka shook her head.

“I don’t even know if he knows what happened. Ojisan hasn’t said anything about him.” Akari-chan looked away sheepishly.

“I… might’ve said something to him,” she said.

“Akari-chan!? Why!?” Haruka asked.

“I thought he should know! No one else was gonna tell him!”

“When did you tell him!?”

“Like, the morning after we found you, before school started. He was in super early, so I pulled him aside. You should’ve seen him when he came back to class after I told him, he was—”

“Did you tell anyone else!?”

“No! Honest! I figured your dad would tell anyone he thought should know, but I feel like Akiyama-sensei wouldn’t be on his radar.”

“Well, my phone has been dead for days. I don’t know if he called or anything. Thanks for bringing my stuff, by the way.”

“No problem. Your phone is charged, why not turn it on and see if he called?”

“I’m too scared…”

“Of what?”

“He might hate me now.”

“Bullshit, why would he?” Azusa-chan asked.

“I was so selfish. And after Sunday…” Haruka suddenly turned bright red. “Wait, you know about that, too, don’t you!?” The three girls looked at each other, smiling. “Oh my god,” she said, putting her head in her hands. Azusa-chan gave her a playful pat on the shoulder.

“Way to go, girl. You know you’ll have to tell us all about it, don’t you? Not right now, we can wait. But not too long,” she said with a wink.

“Go on, turn it on!” Mai-chan said. Haruka sighed and reached for her phone. She put her finger on the power button, closed her eyes, and pushed it, holding it for several seconds. It buzzed to life, and she opened one eye to see the company logo on the screen, loading symbol turning. Suddenly, the screen was on, and she shut her eyes before she could read any of the notifications, feeling the phone buzz constantly as text after text poured in, finally able to arrive after the phone was off for so long.

“Want me to look?” she heard Akari-chan ask. She nodded and felt her taking her phone from her hands. “What’s your passcode?” She told her and waited impatiently, eyes still shut. “Ok, I see stuff from ‘Ayako’, ‘Taichi’, the three of us, Majima-sensei, Nishikiyama-sensei…” The phone continued to buzz. How many people did Ojisan tell!? “Oh!”

“What!?”

“Akiyama-sensei's messages and missed calls are coming in. Poor guy, he’s been absolutely devastated.” Did he try to contact her on her other phone, too? He must've. She really wanted to look at it now, who knows how much he would've been blowing that phone up. “Awww, he calls you ‘angel’? That's adorable! And he even told you we were on our way today!”

“Give me that back!” Haruka said, reaching for it. Akari-chan jumped away, reading some of his messages out loud as she paced the room, scrolling way too much into the conversation.

“‘Angel, are you ok?’ ‘Please wake up soon.’ ‘I miss you.' 'I can't live without you.’ Let’s see…”

“Stop!”

"‘It’s midnight. Happy birthday, angel.’ ‘You have no idea how happy you've made me today, angel. Seeing your face made my whole world brighter.’”

“Those are private!”

“And he called you—one, two, three…—38 times!?” Her other phone must've overheated if he contacted her that much on this phone. “Want to call him?”

“I don't know…”

“Text him?” Haruka said nothing.

“Fine, I'll text him,” Azusa-chan said, yanking her phone from Akari-chan.

“No!” Haruka yelled.

“Why not!? He needs to know! He’ll probably be here in less than 10 minutes once you text him!” No, that's too soon, she's not ready to face him!

“Azusa-chan, come on, drop it,” Mai-chan said.

“Ugh, fine. But you better text him before the day ends, alright?” Azusa-chan said, pointing accusatory at Haruka.

“Fine,” she said, rolling her eyes.

Eventually, the girls went home for the night, leaving Haruka to recover. As the sun was starting to set, a new face arrived in her room. A small, wiry man in a white lab coat with a stethoscope wrapped around his neck, weak smile on his face.

“Sawamura-san, hi, I’m Dr. Shono. Do you have time to go over some things with me?” Haruka nodded. “Alright. Dad, can you step out for a moment?”

“Oh, uh, of course. You ok with that, Haruka?” She nodded again. After Ojisan left, the doctor sat down and spoke.

☆☆☆

Mayflower’s blog:

Entry #71

guess tht was a lie

im still here & im making another post

my frends aparently hav ben readin my blog this hole time without tellin me & my last post made them come to my place & stop me

y couldnt u jst let me die?

now i hav 2 deal wit a bunch of shit @ the hospital & it wont b cheap

wit being in the icu 4 a few days & now having my own private room tht aparently my dad insisted on which ill stay in 4 idk how long

tht money adds up quick

money i dont have

anyway aparently i was “near-drowned” not completely drowned lyk i wanted

& cuz i didnt die my brain mite b sufering the consequenses

if my frends found me jst a few minutes later i mite not b able 2 breath or move on my own

the dr gave me a list of side effects 2 look out 4 since i only woke up a little while ago

shit lyk issues wit balance, seizures, sensory changes, personality changes, memory impairments

this sux

now there tellin me i gotta go 2 physical therapy & sychiatric treatment???

i dont hav the energy 4 allodat!

they said theyd b able 2 make quicker & bigger changes on meds while im here so @ least i dont have 2 wait weeks or months 2 find smth tht mite work

mite hav 2 go 2 grippy sock jail if i act up tho

c u soon i guess

☆☆☆

“Need anything, Haruka?” Ojisan asked when she put her phone down after posting. He still hadn’t left her side. “I think they’ll bring you dinner soon. I can go home and get you something. Maybe a book to pass the time?” She considered asking him to search her closet for her other phone, but that would take way too long to explain.

“You can stay home tonight, Ojisan. You’ve been here the whole time, haven’t you?”

“How did—”

“You look exhausted, and you’re a little stinky, your hair is oily. I overheard one of the nurses say something, too.”

“Are you sure? I don't want you alone your first night awake.”

“At least go home and take a bath, please.” He laughed a little.

“Fine. I won't be long.”

“Take your time.” He gave her a kiss on the forehead.

“I love you. I'm happy you're still here.” She looked down at her hands.

“I love you, too. I'm sorry.” He rubbed her back a little.

“It's ok. You're here. That's what matters.” He stood up and walked out as Haruka continued to stare at her hands. She was reading the manga Azusa-chan lent her when the door opened again.

“Sawamura-san, did your dad go home?” the nurse asked.

“Yeah, he'll be back later.”

“We can't leave you alone right now, you need to be under surveillance.”

“Surveillance?”

“You might attempt to take your own life again.”

“Oh.” Another nurse was sent to monitor her, although that mostly involved her sitting in the same room and playing on her phone. Haruka had no idea what to do and started digging in her bag again.

“What are you looking for?” the nurse asked.

“Just seeing what my friends brought me.”

“Mind if I check? I'll have to take anything you could harm yourself with.” Haruka reluctantly passed the bag to her. She removed some pens, socks, loose sheets of paper, and anything else she could find. Haruka found herself imagining how she could use each item the nurse pulled out. “I'll place these out of reach over here, ok? I'm not confiscating them.” She placed them on a nearby chair and returned the bag to her before returning to her own seat. Haruka inspected what was remaining. There were some items she had missed earlier—a bottle of deodorant, a hairbrush, another manga from one of her friends. She decided to read it, avoiding the stack of homework and still too scared to text Akiyama-san. 

Another nurse entered her room at dinnertime, carrying a tray. Japanese hospital food was decent enough, with seaweed salad, miso soup, cooked fish, and an apple.

Ojisan returned sometime after she finished eating, wearing fresh clothes and smelling like his sandalwood and bergamot cologne, and the nurse who was “monitoring” her left. He had another bag containing some more toiletries, clothes, and books.

“Hopefully, this is enough. Not sure how much longer you'll be staying here.”

“Probably a week, based on what the doctor said.” Ojisan nodded. “I've got all this schoolwork to catch up on,” she said, tapping the top of the stack with her hand. “I can do that to occupy my time.”

“Not tonight.”

“Fine.”

The evening continued to wear on, and she still hadn't messaged Akiyama-san. She had even silenced her phone and left it face down, not wanting to even know if he had messaged her in the past few hours, even if the notification would be buried amongst the dozens of others she had yet to close. But she promised her friend she would text him before the day ended. After hyping herself up, she grabbed her phone and opened her text conversation with Akiyama-san.

— 04 Dec, 06:01 —

↘ Missed call

Akiyama: Good morning. I hope you wake up soon.

— 04 Dec, 08:40 —

Akiyama: Please, let me know you're ok as soon as you can

— 04 Dec, 10:51 —

↘ Missed call

— 04 Dec, 13:15 —

Akiyama: Please get better. I can't live without you.

— 04 Dec, 15:32 —

↘ Missed call

— 04 Dec, 17:12 —

↘ Missed call

— 04 Dec, 19:22 —

↘ Missed call

Akiyama: I don't care if anyone else reads this. I miss you so much.

— 04 Dec, 22:00 —

↘ Missed call

Akiyama: Good night. I hope you wake with the rising sun come morning.

— 06:02 —

↘ Missed call

Akiyama: Good morning. I hope to hear from you soon.

— 08:37 —

↘ Missed call

Akiyama: Your friend told me the fantastic news that you're out of the ICU. I hope you wake up soon.

Akiyama: She also told me about the room they moved you to. I'm not surprised Kiryu-san demanded a private room. I hear it faces the parking lot on the east side.

— 10:50 —

↘ Missed call

— 13:15 —

↘ Missed call

— 15:30 —

↘ Missed call

Akiyama: Your friends are on their way over to see you again. I hope you're awake to greet them.

— 17:10 —

↘ Missed call

Akiyama: Drove past the hospital on my way home today. I imagined you seeing me from your window.

— 19:11 —

↘ Missed call

She didn't dare scroll up any further. It would just make her hate herself more.

— 19:44 —

Me: im awake

Three dots started bouncing on the screen.

Akiyama: Angel! Thank God! I’m coming over right now.

Me: visiting hours r over

Me: u can come tmrw

Akiyama: ( • ᴖ • ｡) You expect me to wait that long?

Me: u alredy waited this long

Akiyama: I suppose. I’m so happy to hear from you. I’ve been so scared.

A lump formed in her throat. She didn’t deserve this man, not at all.

“Haruka? What's the matter?” Ojisan asked. She couldn't speak. “Want some ice cream? I saw an ice cream machine in the lobby.” She nodded and swallowed, ready to force some words out.

“Can you pass me all that stuff over there? I want to just put them away,” she said, pointing at the stack of items the nurse had put out of reach earlier that evening. He grabbed them and brought them to her before exiting the room. She rummaged through the pile, finding crumpled, forgotten pieces of paper that were sitting at the bottom of her bag for who knew how long.

Including two notes. They weren’t from her classmates, she always threw those out. One was the note that Akiyama-san had left in her locker on her birthday that she never got to read, but the other she didn’t recognize. It could’ve been sitting in her bag for months for all she knew.

She considered reading them, but with how she was already feeling, she decided to let them wait until tomorrow. They had already been sitting in her bag for this long, one more night wouldn’t make a difference. So as not to forget them, she placed them on the bedside table, tucked between some cards so no one else could see them. The ice cream Ojisan brought was subpar, but it still helped her feel better.

Saturday, 06 December 2014

Ojisan was suddenly waking her up, shaking her as she was screaming. She had felt the man’s hands on her again, felt the weight of his body again. At first, she thought that Ojisan’s hands were that man’s, that he had finally come back, found her to do it to her again. She soon realized where she was and who he was, and Ojisan rested his head on her pillow, clutching her hands in his as he stayed sitting on the chair.

She was woken up by a nurse a couple of hours later, now alone in her bed, the bright white light from a recently risen sun briefly blinding her. The nurse had come to check her vitals again before breakfast. All normal, thankfully. Breakfast itself was just as fine as dinner. Porridge and juice.

She looked over at Ojisan, back in his chair, eating some food he bought in the hospital cafeteria. That chair looked so uncomfortable. She considered letting him sleep on the hospital bed with her, though it might look strange to the nurses. The amount of space in the bed wouldn’t be too different from when he would stay with her on her futon after waking her up from her nightmares.

Her nightmares. They had returned. Her first night conscious, and the nightmares came back. Fantastic. Why couldn’t they just give her some brandy or something? Don’t they use 70% Isopropyl alcohol to clean their stuff? She’d take that at this point. She then realized that she hadn’t been feeling shaky or anxious or irritable. She supposed that being in a coma for a few days meant she wasn’t conscious during the worst of the withdrawal. But she still craved another drink. To feel that warm, numbing feeling again.

She considered sending Akiyama-san a “good morning” text, but she was so exhausted. Even the thought of reaching for her phone tired her out. Being alive wasn’t any easier than it had been before, and she was still recovering from all the excitement the day prior. Ojisan asked her if she wanted more visitors or if she wanted a break to relax. She only gave a vague response, not caring if she was alone or in Akiyama-san’s beloved Times Square on New Year’s Eve.

She continued to stare out the window, the dreary clouds rolling in not at all helping her mood. She watched the cars come and go, people exit and enter one of the many buildings in the complex. That was when a familiar car pulled into the large parking lot. A 1999 Toyota Camry with scratched and scuffed Blue Dusk Pearl paint. She shouldn’t have been surprised. She glanced at the clock on the wall. It was only just past 8:30, visiting hours not starting for another half hour. That shouldn’t have surprised her, either. She kept her eye on the car, Ojisan being preoccupied with some book. About 20 minutes later, he finally got out of his car.

“Ojisan.”

“Hm?”

“Can you actually go home and get me something?”

“Whatever you need.”

“One of my textbooks is still in the bedroom, can you go get it for me? It's for environmental science.” She described the book and sent him on his way. She eventually saw him walk across the parking lot and desperately hoped the two men didn’t cross paths.

She was still staring out the window, reclined comfortably in the bed, when there was a knock on her door. The door gently opened. She had a feeling she knew who it was. But she was still too scared to face him. She continued to stare out the window at the vast expanse of sky that went on forever. He sat down on the stool by her bed and placed a hand on hers. She finally looked at him.

“Hi,” Akiyama-san said with that handsome smile.

“Hi,” she responded.

“I don’t have room for these,” he said, looking at her crowded bedside table while holding up a bouquet of yellow and red roses.

“Oh, wait, let me—” He put his hand up as she started to move.

“Tell me what to move.” She looked at him incredulously before directing him to put the cards in a pile and pass them to her so she could stack them with her books. Something fell as he did so. He stared at it on the floor as Haruka grabbed the stack of cards and bent down to pick them up once his hands were free. “I recognize these,” he said, holding up two little slips of paper—his notes that she still hadn’t opened. Haruka looked at them, not knowing what to say. “I guess you didn’t get the chance to read the one from your birthday, but which one is this one?” He passed her the note from her birthday as he inspected the other. She hesitated. “Go on, read it.”

“Right now?”

“Why not? No one else is here.”

“That won’t… embarrass you?”

“Of course not. Anything I write is something I would have no problem saying to you. Perhaps you’re the one embarrassed?” She felt her cheeks get hot. He reached his hand out again. “How about I read it out loud, then, hm?” She brought the note closer to her chest. He sat and waited, watching her. “We don’t have all day.” She sighed and started reading.

‘My angel,

I have no words to describe last night. And that's saying a lot! But I'll try. It was amazing. One of the best nights of my life. I'm so happy to be lucky enough to be with you like that. As close as physically possible. Fully enveloped by you. You have become my everything. 

I am so proud of you for putting in the effort to quit, too. Like I said, I’ll be with you every step of the way. Forever.

Happy birthday,

-A’

She looked back over at him. Did he truly mean it when he wrote ‘Forever’? Or had he just not come down from the high of what they had done when he wrote it?

“I meant every word of it,” he responded to her shocked face. “I want you to read this one, too. I had a feeling you never got around to it, given the circumstances.”

“‘Circumstances’?” 

“You’ll see.” She took the note from him and opened it.

‘My angel,

I had an amazing time with you in Sotenbori. The flowers were beautiful, though they paled in comparison to your radiant beauty. Spending a whole day with you in a new city was everything I could’ve asked for. I hope we can go on day trips like that again soon. Go somewhere where no one knows us, where we can be together in the open. I’d act the way I did then every day if I could.

I want to be able to kiss you out in the open, to hold your hand in front of everyone, to take selfies with you without being worried that someone might see them. I want to be with you long enough that you’ll be old enough for us to do so. I want to stay by your side for as long as time itself. There’s one more thing I want to say, too. After you read this, ask me, “What do you want me to say to you more than anything else in the world?” and I’ll answer. Just make sure we're alone when you do.

That was a long one, you better not be late!

-A’

Sotenbori. The flower festival. Right, they took the bullet train to Sotenbori for a day trip during Golden Week. And the first day of school after break was the day that…

“I still kick myself every day for making you hold those buckets of water as a punishment. If I’d known it would knock over this row of dominoes…” He trailed off, not looking at her.

“Akiyama-san.” He looked back up at her, and she reached for his hand. He took it and held it tenderly, rubbing her hand with his thumb. It wasn’t his fault that all of this happened. There were innumerable ways she could have ended up on this path. It wasn’t like she was completely healed from what happened to her. What an idiot he was. A beautiful, wonderful, perfect idiot.

Why was she so scared to face him? How could she possibly think he could hate her? After all that he had dealt with this year, this wasn’t about to make him hate her. She looked at the note again and read aloud, “What do you want me to say to you more than anything else in the world?” He stared at her, scooted the stool closer so he could be right next to her, and took her hands in his as he looked her in the eye.

“‘I love you’.”

Chapter Text

After they finally made love for the first time, Akiyama was no thoughts head empty except for Haruka-chan for the rest of the night and the following day. He was constantly getting distracted by her. He'd lose track of conversations, even ones he started, thinking about her. How she felt, how she looked, how she sounded, how she tasted. God, he couldn't wait to fuck her again. He was going to have to go to the convenience store that night and pick up more condoms, the remaining two would most certainly not be enough.

When she arrived in class that morning and their eyes met again, he had no idea how he had the strength to do nothing. He even started to take a step in her direction before remembering where they were, who was around them.

It was her birthday, and even though they had already celebrated, he still had to give her a little something. He couldn't risk putting a note in her locker that morning, her classmates still were leaving cruel notes in it for her to find, and opted to wait until later that afternoon.

But when she never texted him for the rest of the evening, he started getting worried. Did she regret what they had done? Was she getting too overwhelmed? Did he do too much to her? 

When she never even sent a good night text, he started to call her. But she never responded. He sent text after text after text. Nothing. He tried her other phone, her original phone. Still nothing. Oh god, what had he done!?

He got no sleep and was exhausted the next morning, and she still didn’t respond to any of his texts. He ran through his morning routine and sped all the way to school, wanting to get in extra early in case she was there and he could talk to her before homeroom. But instead of her, her friend Natsukawa-san arrived early. 

“Akiyama-sensei, can I talk to you for a bit?” She looked worn down and distraught. There was no way he could say no, even if it meant missing Haruka-chan. She led him down a hallway to a quiet area, glancing around before speaking. What could she possibly need to say that was so terrible that she’d go to such lengths? “I need to tell you something.” She hesitated. “It’s, uh, pretty bad.” Haruka-chan used to share details about the two of them with her before he asked her to stop. Did she tell her what they had done? And now Haruka-chan was too scared to face him, so she sent her as a messenger instead?

“Ok, sure, what's wrong?”

“Haruka-chan tried to kill herself last night.” 

No

No, that can't be right

No

No no no no no no no no no—

“Sensei?”

He misheard, that must be it.

Or maybe she was lying. He never pegged her to be so cruel as to lie about something like that.

“Sensei?”

“I… what? No, that can't be right. No, no…” He started to pace. 

“I know. But I was the one that found her.” He looked back at her. Her face told him everything. She was telling the truth, she was still seeing Haruka-chan in her mind right that second.

“Are you ok?” he asked.

“Are you?”

“I… I don't…”

“I just thought I should tell you. I wasn't sure if anyone else would.” She was probably right. One way or another, he would be informed of Haruka-chan’s absence as her homeroom teacher, but no one would see the necessity of telling him why.

“Thank you, Natsukawa-san. Do you know how she is now?”

“She was unconscious when they took her, they put her in the ICU.”

Meaning she's still in danger. Meaning she still might …

“Anyway, I just thought it was better for you to know than not to know. See you,” she said with a small wave, leaving him with his thoughts. He crouched on the floor and put his head in his hands. There was nothing in his head except a deep dread building in him, seeping deep into the marrow of his bones.

He thought of her smile, her laugh, her peaceful face while she slept, her cute frown when he teased her. What if he never got to experience any of that again? How could he possibly continue?

This was so different from losing Hana. He knew she was alive and well. He always had the opportunity to reach out if he had to. And they had shared years together, a life together, a marriage together. And he had hoped to have the same thing with Haruka-chan. But that all could come crashing down in an instant. It almost did last night if it weren’t for Natsukawa-san. He hadn’t thought he might lose her so suddenly. 

Is that how Haruka-chan thought all the time? Way back in the summer of the previous year, they were at the gardens and talking under the rain shelter, right before he kissed her for the first time. She had said how she lived without hesitation because her life was never guaranteed, the same for Kiryu-san. How could she possibly carry such a burden? Constantly believing that any day might be her last, every time she saw someone might be the last time.

The final bell rang. Had he really been crouching there on the ground, wallowing in misery for almost an hour? And now he was expected to just go to homeroom and then teach Home Ec, spending the day as if nothing had happened, nothing was wrong?

He couldn’t even get himself to run to homeroom. Once he entered classroom 2-B several minutes later, a student, he couldn’t be bothered to see who, asked if he was ok. He barely acknowledged them. He thought he heard one of them say “Sawamura”, but he must’ve been imagining it.

Somehow, three days passed. Time just kinda bled together in one endless wheel that he had to endure. He still called and texted her, hoping she might wake up and he would catch her as soon as she did. He would call and text the same message to both her phones, just to be sure. But by Tuesday night, his calls went straight to voicemail. And the silly girl never set up her voicemail, he couldn’t leave a single message. His texts would have to suffice if she ever received them.

When he wasn't calling or texting her, his mind was clouded by thoughts of her. Of all the little things he loved about her, and he kept finding new things he loved about her as he dwelled. The nights were the hardest, he didn't have classes to teach or people to talk to to distract himself. He would anxiously wander the city, stopping in Elise, stopping in Sky Finance, smoking cigarette after cigarette, visiting his homeless buddies, though he didn't share any drinks with them.

Natsukawa-san was so kind and would let him know how she was doing. She was so lucky, able to see her with her friends after school every day. People would only talk if he stopped by the ICU to gaze at her unconscious body.

Then, Friday morning, they told him she’d been removed from the ICU. Even though she was still unconscious, he had to stop himself from crying at the fantastic news. She wasn’t at risk of dying anymore. Something even better happened that evening.

😇🩷🌸Haruka-chan🌸🩷😇: im awake

Akiyama had to open and reopen that message dozens of times. Was it true? Was she really awake? And well enough to reach out to him? It was his turn to almost die.

Me: Angel! Thank God! I’m coming over right now.

😇🩷🌸Haruka-chan🌸🩷😇: visiting hours r over

😇🩷🌸Haruka-chan🌸🩷😇: u can come tmrw

Me: ( • ᴖ • ｡) You expect me to wait that long?

😇🩷🌸Haruka-chan🌸🩷😇: u alredy waited this long

Me: I suppose. I’m so happy to hear from you. I’ve been so scared.

He looked up the visiting hours for Touto University Hospital. Her friend Natsukawa-san really was so kind to tell him as much as she did. He wondered how much she and Haruka-chan’s other friends knew. If she came in early and pulled him aside to tell him specifically, with the belief no one else would, then she had to have at least some idea of what his relationship with her and her dad was. But he didn’t care enough to dwell on it at the moment.

Visiting hours hadn’t actually ended yet. He was hurt that she would lie to him about that, but at the same time, he understood why. She just woke up a few days after… something like that, she was probably already being bombarded on all sides by everyone else in her life. She deserved a break. But he hardly was able to even lie down in bed, let alone sleep, for the entire night.

Visiting hours started at 9 am. He decided not to bother trying to get any more sleep at about 5:30. Even though he knew that he couldn’t see her for another three and a half hours, he still rushed just as much to get ready. But he still pulled out all the stops. He showered, washed his hair, styled it just so, wore her favorite outfit and cologne of his, kept checking himself in the mirror to make sure he was as presentable as possible, and put on his nicest Italian dress shoes. It still wasn’t even 7.

That’s fine, he should probably eat breakfast anyway. He drove to a local coffee shop, smoking a cigarette on the way to calm his nerves, and ordered an omelet with a side of bacon and, of course, a black coffee with a shot of espresso. No, two, just to be sure—he didn’t want to be too tired when he finally got to see her again. He did his best to dawdle, enjoy the atmosphere, savor the coffee. He was still done and paying at the counter less than 15 minutes after sitting down.

Next stop was the flower shop. It was cliche, but he loved the language of flowers and always put thought into the bouquets he gifted. Maybe in another life, he would be running a flower shop instead of a hostess club, advising customers on which flowers would suit their needs instead of which hostess, spending his days surrounded by a different kind of beauty. And he could easily picture Haruka-chan right by his side whenever she wasn’t out studying her beloved marine life, wearing a cute garden apron and her straw hat that she treasured so much. A calm, simple life. One that she deserved.

He settled on yellow and red roses. Yellow for warmth and joy, and, of course, red roses for his ever-deepening love for her. He couldn’t delay telling her how he felt any longer, not after almost losing her like this. He was going to try to set up the perfect opportunity to tell her today. It may be selfish, she was the one recovering in the hospital, but he hoped that it would be something she would want to hear, something that would help her feel even a little bit better.

He still found himself driving over the speed limit plenty of times on the way to the hospital, and it still was only 8:30 when he arrived. Maybe one of the nurses would let him see her early? It was only by half an hour. But she might be sleeping or enjoying breakfast, and he didn’t want to disturb her. Also, Kiryu-san might be there, and showing up so early with a bouquet of roses wasn’t exactly inconspicuous. 

No, he had to wait, he didn’t want to intrude. He lit a cigarette and rolled the window down, distracting himself as much as possible. The December air was chilly, and dark, dreary clouds rolled in overhead. He had a second just in case—he didn't want to step away from her just because he was craving a smoke. When it was less than 10 minutes until 9, he finally climbed out of the car. If he had to wait, the hospital had a room specifically built for waiting. The parking lot was huge, and it took him a while to reach the front door.

“Excuse me, I’m here to see a Sawamura?”

“Visiting hours start at 9,” the nurse behind the desk said, not even looking up from the computer she was typing away at.

“Is that really such a hard and fast rule? It’s close enough, and it’ll probably already be 9 by the time I find her.”

“Sorry, sir, but they start at 9.” He plucked a rose from the bouquet, ready to try to woo her to let him see his darling just a few minutes quicker.

“Koyuki-chan, don’t be such a stick in the mud, let the man see her,” another nurse behind the desk said. “You said you were here to see Sawamura, right? I’ve been one of the nurses attending her. She’s had quite a few visitors since she woke up yesterday—”

“That’s not APPI compliant, Yuki-san.”

“You gonna report me? Get me written up again?”

“If I have to.” The lady-apparently-named-Yuki-san huffed.

“She’s in room 394. That elevator down the hall will be your fastest way.” Akiyama put on his most charming smile.

“Thank you both very much, young ladies. Have a pleasant day.” Yuki-san put a hand on her cheek and brushed him off with a smile, while the other, apparently named Koyuki-chan, simply rolled her eyes. Akiyama started to walk in the direction of the elevator when one of them opened, and Kiryu-san stepped out. A few petals fell from his bouquet as he dashed behind a pillar, grateful that Kiryu-san was looking at his phone when the doors opened. He watched the man continue to walk down the hall and leave through the front door, not noticing him. Lady Luck was on his side. He looked at the reception desk and saw the two nurses who had watched the whole thing. God, who knew what weird stories they were spinning in their minds.

Once he was confident that Kiryu-san wasn’t coming back, he ran to the elevator and repeatedly hit the “up” button until one of them opened. He sprung in, pushed the button for the third level, and pushed the “close doors” button right after, ignoring the elderly lady approaching the elevator. There was going to be another one. He bounced on his feet the entire ride up and almost collided with a nurse wheeling a patient in a wheelchair in front of the elevator doors in his haste. He repeated the number “394” under his breath as he hunted the halls. Finally, he found it. Found her. He bent down and put his hands on his knees, wheezing as he caught his breath. He really should quit smoking.

There was a small window in the door, and he peeked in. It looked like she was the only one in the room. And her friend was right, it was a private room. There weren’t any other beds in sight or could even fit in there, really.

I’ll have to make sure I foot the bill on all this before Kiryu-san gets a chance. No way his insurance can cover all of this.

Technically, he didn’t see her, just her legs under the blanket and her hands resting on her lap, a yellow privacy curtain hiding the rest of her. But he knew those hands. Those hands he’d held so many times, kissed so many times. Those hands that had wandered over every part of him. He shook out his limbs, fixed his hair, took one final breath, and tapped on the door. He inched the door open, staying quiet in case she was still asleep.

He stepped around the curtain, not moving it in case she wanted it kept there. She was so beautiful. The head of the bed was raised up for her to sit, but she could still lean back comfortably. She was staring out of the window at a view that was probably better at a different time of year. But the dark clouds still had silver linings. Her ponytail was resting over her shoulder. Her eyelashes were visible in the silhouette of her face. She was in a hospital gown, her slender neck and some of her chest exposed. A monitor on the other side of her bed read her heart rate, oxygen levels, and other things he didn’t know the first thing about. Connected to it were some cables and tubes attached to various parts of her. He swallowed the lump that was daring to form in his throat.

He sat on the stool that was beside her bed, and he noticed he could see his car. She probably told Kiryu-san to leave after seeing him exit his car, the clever girl. He couldn’t take it any longer and placed his hand on hers. She finally looked at him.

“Hi,” he said.

“Hi.”

“I don’t have room for these,” he said, showing her the bouquet while looking at her bedside table, nigh overflowing with cards and flowers. While part of him was a little sad that his bouquet wasn’t all that special, he was still overwhelmingly happy that she had so many people in her life who cared so much about her. He desperately hoped she saw and understood that.

“Oh, wait, let me—” He put his hand up as she shifted to grab something.

“Tell me what to move.” She gave the cutest little pout and had him pile all the cards in a stack. As he gathered them together, two little slips of paper fell on the floor. After Haruka took the bundle of cards from him, he bent down to pick them up. “I recognize these,” he said. They were notes that he had written for her, unopened. “I guess you didn’t get the chance to read the one from your birthday, but which one is this one?” He passed her the note from her birthday as he inspected the other. She hesitated, and he said, “Go on, read it.”

“Right now?”

“Why not? No one else is here.”

“That won’t… embarrass you?”

“Of course not. Anything I write is something I would have no problem saying to you. Perhaps you’re the one embarrassed?” She shyly looked away, cheeks turning red. She was so cute when she got flustered like this. “How about I read it out loud, then, hm?” When she didn’t pass the note to him, he said, “We don’t have all day.” She sighed and started reading. He looked at the other note as she did so, and joy bloomed in him. This was the note. The note. His opportunity was handed to him on a platinum plate.

He looked back at her and watched her finish reading the first note. He remembered word-for-word what he wrote. He had agonized over it for so long, meticulously considering each word. When she looked back at him, he was almost saddened by her surprise. Did she really have a hard time believing his feelings for her, even after everything?

“I meant every word of it. I want you to read this other note, too. I had a feeling you never got around to it, given the circumstances.”

“‘Circumstances’?” 

“You’ll see.” She took the note from him and opened it.

Having just read the note himself, he was reminded of that wonderful day they spent together in Sotenbori. And everything that changed so soon after. He was so happy, they both were. But because of his idiocy, his stupidity…

“I still kick myself every day for making you hold those buckets of water as a punishment. If I’d known it would knock over this row of dominoes…” he said when she looked back at him, not daring to look her in the eye.

“Akiyama-san.” He looked back up at her, and she reached for his hand. He took it and held it tenderly, rubbing her hand with his thumb. She gave him the softest, most tender smile he had ever seen. His angel was once again forgiving him when he was the last man in the world who deserved it. God, he loved her so much. He was going to burst if she didn’t ask him that question soon. She finally looked at the note again and read aloud, “What do you want me to say to you more than anything else in the world?”

She asked him. She finally asked him. He moved the stool directly next to her, able to meet her gaze in full vulnerability. He held both of her hands, needing an anchor before his euphoria floated him away. He didn’t even hesitate, didn’t need to second-guess himself.

“‘I love you’.”

She stared at him, but not in shock like he feared. No, she looked at him like women in movies seeing their long-lost love unexpectedly coming home from war. Tears started to well in her eyes. He continued to look at her, anxiously waiting for her to say something. To say it. She wiped her eyes with her hand before looking back at him.

“Ok, then. I love you.”

She said it.

She actually said it.

He let out a breathy laugh, wrapped his arms around her, and kissed her cheek. “I love you too. I love you. I love you so much.” He couldn’t stop. All the ‘I love you’s he had bottled up inside him came pouring out. He put his hands on her cheeks and kissed her all over her face, repeating the phrase over and over. “I love you. I love you. I love you.”

When he finally stopped, he rested his head at the crook of her neck as she leaned back against the bed, and she rested her head on his. He brought her hand to his lips and kissed each little finger before turning and softly kissing her neck. He clutched her hand tightly, bringing it to his chest, his beating heart, to keep her close.

“I love you,” she told him again. He couldn’t stop smiling. When he divorced Hana, he thought he would never say it to anyone again. Never thought he would ever feel that way about anyone again. And yet, by some miracle, an angel swooped into his life and allowed him to do so. He was the luckiest man on earth. While in his reverie, the sky opened, and the warm sunlight shone in. He closed his eyes, savoring this beautiful, perfect moment. Would he prefer the location and circumstances be different? Sure, but that didn’t make this moment any less special.

“Haruka-chan,” he said. “Please, don’t leave us.” She put her hand that he wasn’t holding on his cheek, and he looked up at her.

“I’ll try.”

“That’s all I can really ask for,” he said, and she put her lips on his. A simple, soft little kiss. Their lips met again, this time a deeper kiss, a kiss that felt like a promise. Not a promise to stay, but a promise to do her very best. Mouths opened, and she removed her hand from his to wrap her arms around him, and he put his hand on the back of her head to keep her with him.

“How long will Kiryu-san be gone?”

“It takes about 20 minutes to walk home from here.” He checked his watch. He had been there for not even 15 minutes. They had plenty of time. He returned his lips to hers and wrapped his arm around her waist, pulling her even closer to him. She released an involuntary moan, and he grabbed onto her ponytail. He pulled her head back and kissed her clavicle, the hospital gown leaving much more of her exposed than her usual clothes.

He stood and closed the privacy curtain before returning to her, sitting on her bed before diving his tongue into her again. She started to unbutton his shirt, and he removed his suit jacket, not separating from her for a moment. He let his jacket fall, not caring where it landed, and when she finished unbuttoning his shirt, he let it fall, too. He still had his undershirt on, and she moved her hands up under it to feel more of him. He pulled the blanket off of her legs and carressed her thigh, moving his hand higher and higher. She gasped as his hand touched the very top, hand over her panties. He started rubbing slowly against her, kissing her chest.

The door flew open.

“Sawamura-san!” a nurse yelled. “Your heart rate is spiking!” She shot the privacy curtain open and yanked it closed again, the two lovers frozen and staring in her direction. She stammered out an apology before running out of the room and shutting the door.

“Sorry, forgot I had… all of this on me,” Haruka-chan said, gesturing at the cables that were still attached to her.

“N-no, no, it's ok,” Akiyama said, heart only just starting to crawl out of his stomach.

“Bit of a mood killer, huh?” she said, laughing half-heartedly.

“I guess we'll have to wait until you're out. Any idea how long that'll be?”

“I have some appointments today where they'll assess me and stuff, I'll probably find out this afternoon.”

“Ok,” he said, nodding before giving her another quick kiss. He found his shirt and jacket and redressed himself, adjusting his clothes and hair to be presentable as she covered herself with the blanket. To keep himself from giving in to base desires, he opened the privacy curtain halfway—enough that others could see her, but still not see him. He sat on the stool and leaned over to rest his head on her shoulder, still happy to have even this simple pleasure back, more grateful for it than he ever had been before. He took her hand in his, resting it on her thigh, gently rubbing her hand with his thumb.

“I love you.”

Chapter Text

Akari, Azusa-chan, and Mai-chan walked to the hospital together Saturday morning. They all wanted to check in on Haruka-chan again—and maybe get some juicy details on her little deed with Akiyama-sensei.

They greeted the nurses at the front desk as they walked past, their faces now recognized by the staff to the point that they didn’t even need to check in. They had some of her favorite sweets in tow, and Azusa-chan brought the second volume of the manga she had lent Haruka-chan. When they got to her door, they peeked through the window to make sure they weren't going to disturb her. And good thing, too, because they saw her hand conjoined with another, arms stretched out beyond the privacy curtain. The hand of a man wearing a golden watch and a maroon pinstriped suit jacket, his thumb caressing her hand. All their faces lit up, Akari putting her hands over her mouth in delight.

“That's just adorable,” Mai-chan said.

“Not as adorable as you,” Azusa-chan said. Ever since they held hands while combing the Champion District during summer break, searching for Haruka-chan, the two girls were less shy talking that way in front of Akari.

She regretted leaving Haruka-chan so quickly that day. She should have tried harder to pull her out of that bar, to get her help, anything. But instead, she just read her blog and watched her friend spiral. But, really, what help could she have gotten her? She stopped going to therapy, and neither her dad nor Akiyama-sensei could do anything either. And they were adults with money, power, connections.

“Let's not disturb them,” Mai-chan continued. “He's gotta leave at some point.” The other two agreed, and they turned to leave, when down the hall they saw a familiar face. Her dad, the legendary Dragon of Dojima, carrying a textbook, was walking towards the room. The three looked at each other and understood the plan they all came up with independently.

“Kiryu-san, how are you?” Azusa-chan asked him, jogging down the hallway toward him. Mai-chan stayed by the door while Akari opened it.

“Haruka-chan, how are you?” she said as soon as she entered the room. He removed his hand from hers as soon as the latch of the doorknob clicked, and she was a little sad that they had to hide something so wonderful from everyone. When she reached the bed, Akiyama-sensei was standing next to it behind the privacy curtain, hands in his pockets.

“Natsukawa-san, good morning,” he said. He was a little red in the cheeks, and his hair was still a little out of place. She could only imagine what the two had been up to in here. But she couldn’t waste any time.

“Your dad is coming down the hallway,” she whispered. Haruka-chan gasped and looked up at Akiyama-sensei.

“Shit,” he said under his breath.

“Azusa-chan is keeping him at bay but she can only do that for so long.” Akiyama-sensei nodded and moved to leave. “At least say goodbye to her,” she said and walked back to the door. She watched his feet—and the fancy shoes he was wearing!—under the privacy curtain and could tell he leaned over to kiss her. They whispered something to each other before he jogged to the door, but she put her hand up to keep him in place. She looked down the hall. Azusa-chan was talking to Kiryu-san about something, Mai-chan standing by the door to keep some cover. “Go,” she whispered to Akiyama-sensei, and he briefly thanked her before fleeing in the opposite direction, careful to keep his steps light, finding the stairs, and disappearing.

Once he was squarely out of sight, Mai-chan walked down to Azusa-chan and grabbed her hand. She took the hint, and they all walked back to Haruka-chan’s room.

Akari dashed in and whispered to her, “You have to tell us everything, are you kidding me!?” Haruka-chan smiled sheepishly, and the room was suddenly filled with happy voices. She thanked Kiryu-san for bringing her textbook over, and he dismissed himself again to let them all catch up with each other. But not before insisting on a hug and a kiss. He was still her dad, and after everything, Akari was impressed he was able to let her out of his sight at all.

“Akari-chan, do you see him in the parking lot?” Haruka-chan asked her. Akari walked to the window and searched high and low.

“Ooh, he's running out of the front door now.” Haruka-chan sat up a bit and watched him not stop running until he arrived at his car. He bent down and put his hands on his knees, catching his breath before climbing in. It was hard to look inside the car, the reflection of the sky on the windshield blocking their view of him. Haruka-chan’s phone buzzed, and she grabbed it from the bedside table, smiling as she stared at the screen. His hand stuck out of the driver’s side window, lit cigarette between his fingers, and he finally drove out of the parking lot. All eyes turned to her.

“Girl. Spill. I'm begging you!” Azusa-chan said to her. She sighed.

“I should've seen this coming,” she said with another smile.

“Oh, I'm sure you saw something cumming!” Mai-chan smacked her on the arm, and she playfully winced. Haruka-chan rolled her eyes. 

“Alright, gather ‘round,” she said, and all three sat on her bed. Haruka-chan spent the next several minutes doing her best to talk about what they did, starting with him taking her to Le Marche, but she was constantly blushing, having to stop and find the words, or take breaths, or put her hands to her face. When she got to the end (like, his end!) the girls couldn't take it anymore. Really, they were all a bit embarrassed, too. None of them had gone anywhere near as far with a boy, let alone a man! But watching her smiling face, seeing her genuinely happy for the first time in she didn't even know how long, Akari didn't dare ask her to stop.

“Looks like you did text him last night,” Azusa-chan said.

“Yeah, he showed up before visiting hours even started. I had to think of an excuse for Ojisan to leave for a while, so I told him to get my textbook from home.” The three girls responded with an ‘aww’ that started low and went higher pitched with each passing second. She rolled her eyes again, smile not leaving her face. “And… he… he said he loved me.” All three girls suddenly stood, not at all able to contain their excitement, shrieking with girlish delight.

“Well!? What did you say!?” Akari asked.

“What do you think?” The girls continued to shriek and jump to the point that Ojisan entered the room.

“Girls!? Is everything ok!?”

“Sorry, Kiryu-san,” the girls all said in unison, stopping immediately to bow in apology. He looked at them in confusion before closing the door again. They all returned to her bed, congratulating her and hugging her.

“See how fun it is to tell us everything?” Akari said to her. The other two nodded in agreement.

“I’m sorry, guys. Akiyama-san told me not to talk about him anymore. I mean, I get it, it’s not exactly… I don’t know, he kept saying it’s ‘inappropriate’ and whatever. Usami-san kinda caught us last year, we were both pretty paranoid about something getting out.”

“Oh, yeah, I remember now. I mean, after the whole… umbrella thing, I guess he was right,” Mai-chan said.

“Don’t remind me.”

“Sorry.” A knock on the door.

“Sawamura-san,” a doctor, who had some of the biggest ears Akari had ever seen, said, walking in before greeting everyone. “We’re ready to get started.”

“Ok. I’ll talk to you guys later.” The girls all stood and said goodbye, leaving Haruka-chan with her doctor.

☆☆☆

Much of the day was filled with appointments, constantly getting pressed and probed, verbally and physically. To move from place to place, the nursing staff rolled her around in a wheelchair. It was humiliating. She never had to be handled like that, at least not while sober. Picked up from her bed and placed in the chair just so.

Her first appointment was another regular checkup, and she was forced to stay seated in the wheelchair the entire time. They did some blood tests, checked her reflexes, and even had her read off one of those eye charts. Her reflexes were a little slow, but not enough to raise alarms. She had some trouble reading the bottom few rows of the eye chart, but she hadn’t been able to afford to go to an eye doctor in years, so no one was sure if it was because of her attempt or if her vision was already like that. At least her seat at school was in the center and close to the front, she should have no issue seeing the chalkboard. Maybe she would even need to be moved to the first row, right in front of Akiyama-sensei, if she played her cards right.

She was carted off to physical therapy next. For the first time since she had laid down in the bathtub at her apartment that night, she had the opportunity to stand up. She was only further humiliated, struggling to use her muscles and putting all of her weight on her feet. She was always so weak.

“After lying down for a few days, your muscles need a little time,” the physician told her. “We’ll check again this afternoon. Here are some stretches and exercises you can do while seated or lying down.”

She was finally wheeled to the appointment she feared the most.

“Sawamura-san, welcome. I’m Dr. Terasawa and I am the psychiatrist here.”

“Hi,” was all she said.

First, she filled out a questionnaire. It was nigh identical to the one she had filled out for Makimura-sensei over a year ago.

‘In the past two weeks, have you considered harming yourself or someone else?’, ‘In the past two weeks, how often did you feel hopeless or like the world didn't care?’, ‘In the past two weeks, how often have you used drugs or alcohol?’

She wasn’t asked to tally up the points this time, though. Afterward, the psychiatrist asked her more questions, questions that she hated to hear and hated to answer even more. Questions about how she was feeling, her alcohol use. Why she wanted to kill herself.

The doctor then pulled out a little notepad and wrote out a prescription. She threw around words like ‘SSRI’, ‘Zoloft’, ‘co-morbidity’, and quickly ran through a bunch of side effects she might experience from starting such a high dose so quickly. Haruka only caught a few here and there, she hardly cared enough or even had the energy to pay attention, to be honest.

“Also, I see you never received a diagnosis,” she said, looking at her computer.

“Wait, really?”

“Your therapist isn’t a doctor, she can’t officially diagnose you. It might change as we continue your treatment, but for now, I’ll put ‘Post-traumatic Stress Disorder’, ‘Major Depressive Disorder’, ‘Alcohol Use Disorder’, and ‘Depersonalization/Derealization Disorder with Past Dissociative Amnesia’. How does that sound?” As she spoke, she typed in some sort of code that Haruka couldn’t make heads or tails of.

“Uh, fine?” The doctor simply nodded, and she was wheeled away again.

After eating lunch and being visited by Majima-san and Nishiki, they wheeled her to physical therapy again. She found standing and walking to be a little easier, having performed the exercises and stretches throughout the day. It still wasn’t as effortless as before, but it was an improvement. They told her they expected a full recovery in the coming days, but she didn’t find much joy in that. She was going to mostly rot in bed once she got discharged anyway, so what did it matter that she could walk from one wall to the other?

☆☆☆

Mayflower’s blog:

Entry #72

evryone! quiet! i hav smth importent 2 say!

A said he loved me!!!!!!!!! (づ> v <)づ♡

i guess ill have 2 stay alive 4 a little while

im feeling pretty gr8 rite now!

still wish i could hav a drink but no 1 is willing 2 smuggle sum in 4 me ૮(˶ㅠ︿ㅠ)ა

these meds they put me on r making me all shaky

a drink would prolly sort tht rite out!

theyll put me on diferent ones tmrw

ughhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh i hate feeling lyke a lab rat being experimmented on

they also said as long as i can walk again during my pt appt later theyll move me 2 grippy sock jail

maybe ill pretend i cant walk or pretend im not so sad anymore

tht place looks terrifying

c u later

Sunday, 06 December 2014

Akiyama: Can I come see you again today?

Me: i only hav so many exuses 2 get Ojisan 2 leave 4 an extended period of time

Akiyama: The man has to get back to work eventually.

“Ojisan.”

“Hm?” He was sitting on a chair by her bed, reading.

“Will you be going back to work soon?”

“My boss said I could take as long as I need.”

“You’re not getting bored?”

“I mean, I suppose. But I don’t like the idea of leaving you here by yourself.”

“I won’t be by myself. I’ll have nurses and doctors coming, plus Majima-san and Nishiki and my friends will all keep stopping by after school. They need to give me my homework, after all.”

“Ridiculous that they’re making you do all of that while in the hospital.” She simply shrugged.

“Don't you want to sleep on your own futon?”

“Do you really not want me here that badly?”

“Don't say that,” she said, looking down at her hands.

“Sorry, I was just trying to make a joke.” He stood up and kissed her forehead. “If you’re absolutely sure, I’ll head home, then, and let my boss know I’ll be back tomorrow. But please call me if you want me back here. I’ll be right over.” She nodded, they exchanged 'I love you's, and he left her room. It was so quiet so suddenly. The staff weren’t as strict about leaving her alone as the first day she was awake—she had figured out what to say and how often she should smile for them to deem it unnecessary. She was alone with her thoughts. She hated that.

Me: ojisan is going home

Me: hell b staying there

Akiyama: Really? I’m surprised he was able to.

Me: took sum convincing

Me: can u come over?

Akiyama: Already heading to my car.

Not even 10 minutes later, Akiyama-san, the man she loved, the man who loved her, walked through her door. He opened the curtain slightly and gave her a soft smile.

“Hi, angel,” he said softly and walked over to her. He sat on her bed and gave her a tender kiss before resting his forehead on hers.

“Hi,” she finally said. “I missed you, Akiyama-san.”

“I missed you more. And I feel like you should call me something different than ‘Akiyama-san’. You know, considering everything.”

“I guess you’re right.” She looked up at him. “What should I call you, then?”

“Well, Majima-san calls me Aki-chan.” Haruka was laughing before he even finished speaking. She knew Majima-san’s nickname for him, and it made her laugh every time she heard him call him that. “Guess not.” He stared at her some more. “You could call me by my given name.”

“‘Shun’?” They both blushed.

“Y-yeah, I wouldn’t mind that,” he said, rubbing the back of his neck. “I mean, I already call you ‘Haruka-chan’, right?”

“I-I suppose so. But ‘Shun’ doesn’t sound as nice as ‘Akiyama’.”

“Yeah, I know.” He paused to think. “Some people combine the first syllables of their names for a nickname, so mine would be…”

“Aki-Shu?”

“Gesundheit.”

The two spent a while throwing names around, combining syllables in various ways, considering other readings of the characters in his name, and thinking of different suffixes.

“Ugh, this is taking too long! Can’t I just call you Akiyama-san for now?”

“I suppose, but I’d like you to call me something else sooner than later. It still feels too formal after everything we’ve been through together. Everything we’ve done together.” He grinned slyly, exaggeratingly wiggling his brows. Haruka blushed, a vivid memory of how he felt inside her invading her mind.  He turned his eyes from her, rubbing the back of his neck again. “And… if we, you know, stay together long enough and, uh, we, like, got married or something,” he said, cheeks turning bright red, “you’d take my name. It’d be weird for you to keep calling me ‘Akiyama-san’ at that point.” Haruka turned even redder. He really thought about something like that? Even after everything that’s happened? Not just to the both of them, but to him in particular?

“Oh, uh, ok, well, I guess I’ll call you ‘Shu-chan’ for now?” He smiled with tenderness and gave her arm a loving rub.

“That’s fine by me.” He leaned in and gave her a gentle kiss, hand on cheek, and rested his forehead on hers again. “I love you.”

“I love you, too.”

He stayed by her side until well after visiting hours ended. He had to control himself at times, that privacy curtain was so enticing, but he stayed sitting right next to her, holding her hand, talking, or saying nothing. He didn’t even let himself step out for a smoke. Yuki-san eventually found him and kicked him out, but she couldn’t hide her smile.

Monday, 07 December 2014

She was suddenly awoken by nurses asking her what was wrong and trying to calm her down. His hands were on her, his weight was on her, the ceiling of Morning Glory Orphanage was above her. And Ojisan wasn’t there to comfort her, to lay by her side for the rest of the night. Maybe she shouldn't have told him to leave. She gave him a call and was starting to believe he would sleep right through his phone ringing when he finally answered.

“Haruka? What's wrong?” He sounded like he was still waking up and figuring out how to even speak.

“I had another nightmare,” she said, suppressing sobs.

“I'm sorry I can't be there. I'll come back tomorrow—”

“No, no, it's ok. I just want to talk for a little until I've calmed down.” When she was younger and experiencing nightmares after he first took her in, Ojisan would make up stories to calm her down and help her fall back to sleep. They weren’t always necessarily the kind of story a 9-year-old would be interested in, but she always appreciated the effort. This time, he ended up telling her a story that he made up on the spot over the phone, a story about a rainbow dragon who was the strongest in the world but learned that fighting wasn't always the answer. Haruka couldn't help but notice the similarities, but it was still helping a great deal. Soon, her eyelids grew heavy again.

“Haruka, are you still there?”

“Huh? Oh, sorry, I think I was falling asleep.”

“That's good. I'll let you sleep then.” She nodded before speaking.

“Ok, Ojisan. Thank you.”

“I told you I'd do anything for you. I meant it.”

“Goodnight. I love you.”

“Goodnight. I love you, too.”

Her phone was suddenly ringing. Haruka jolted awake, at first believing it was another nightmare. The sun hadn't even risen, the horizon just starting to turn red.

“Akiyama-san?” she said into the receiver.

“Angel, hi, are you alright? You sound upset.”

“Yeah, ‘cause you woke me up after I already didn't sleep well.”

“Nightmares again?”

“Yeah…”

“Sorry I woke you. I just woke up myself and wanted to check in on you and make sure you're ok.” She imagined him lying on his bed, tangled up in his duvet, shirtless, impressive torso on display, wearing his necklace with his pendant and Sagittarius charm. “It'd be suspicious if I called out from work, you know?”

“Called out?”

“So I could be with you again today.”

“You could come by after school.”

“Along with everyone else?” He wasn't wrong—more than likely, her friends alongside both Majima-san and Nishiki would all stop by after school, plus Ojisan would probably come by after work.

“It's not like we don't know how to act in front of other people.”

“Apparently, that's not the case. Otherwise, people wouldn't be so willing to believe those rumors.” She sighed. “Sorry, didn't mean to sour your mood even more.”

“No, it's ok. You're not wrong.”

“And after this past week and last weekend… No way can I act normally in front of everyone.” Haruka smiled. “And you're up on the third floor, too. Can't just look in your window before work. Maybe I can figure out a way…” She giggled. 

“You're so silly, Akiyama-san.”

“Didn't we decide you’d call me Shu-chan?”

“O-oh, right, sorry. I'm so used to calling you ‘Akiyama-san’.”

“And I just woke you up suddenly. Don't worry, I'm not offended or anything.”

“Ok.”

“God,” he whispered. “I'm getting hard just thinking about fucking you last weekend, right here in my bed.” Haruka's cheeks turned red. “I can't wait to do that again. To be so close to you. To give you all of me.” She wasn't sure how to respond. Of course, she felt the same way, and she had to admit that hearing that gorgeous, gruff morning voice of his, lowly telling her all of those things, was turning her on. But saying something like that back? “It was one of the best nights of my life.” That, she could respond to.

“Mine, too.” He let out a breathy laugh.

“I miss you so much. Get better, nice and quick, ok?”

“Ok.”

“Ok, I'll let you rest.” He paused for a moment before continuing. “I love you.” She smiled.

“I love you, too. Bye.” She hung up and smushed her face into her pillow. What a man! She had a hard time falling back to sleep.

☆☆☆

Later that afternoon, as expected, everyone showed up, all in a group—her friends, Majima-san, and Nishiki all piled into her little room together. It was honestly a little too cramped, but none of them wanted to leave. Daigo-nii-san never visited, never able to even leave work for the day until well after visiting hours ended. But his well wishes were always passed along. They were helping Haruka with her homework and chatting when yet another person entered the room. Haruka looked up, expecting to see Ojisan, hoping to see Shu-chan. But it wasn't either of them.

“Hana-san?” Everyone turned to face her, and Hana-san looked at everyone in turn. She didn't seem at all bothered by all of the eyes on her.

“Haruka-chan, I'd like a moment to talk.”

“Oh, uh, sure. I'll talk to you all later,” she said by way of dismissing everyone else. Akari-chan quickly whispered to Mai-chan and Azusa-chan that she was Akiyama-sensei's ex-wife, and the two girls looked back over in shock just as they exited the room.

“How are you feeling, Haruka-chan?” Hana-san asked. She walked a little further into the room but still stayed a healthy distance away from the bed.

“I'm recovering. Why are you here, Hana-san?”

“Despite everything, I still care about you. I have known you since you were 9, you know.” 

That's half of my life. Shu-chan has known me for half of my life now. And I've only known him for barely a quarter of his.

Hana-san finally walked over to the stool by Haruka's bed and sat down, looking at all of the flowers and gifts on the bedside table. “Sorry, didn't think to bring you anything.”

“That's ok. I've got too much already.” They sat in silence for an uncomfortable amount of time before Hana-san finally spoke again.

“I was never mad at you. I want you to know that.” Haruka stared at her, dumbfounded. “I'm hardly mad about any of it anymore. I guess it's already been over a year since the divorce, hasn't it? I still haven't seen Shun this entire time.”

“Do you want to?” Hana-san hesitated, starting and stopping to speak multiple times.

“I don't really know. But I probably shouldn't.” Haruka nodded. Not in agreement, but in understanding. “You know, your friend came looking for you a few months ago at the office.”

“At Sky Finance?”

“Apparently, Majima-san thought it was a great idea to send her my way to ask if I'd seen you at all. I started getting worried after she left, and I might've done a little digging.” Haruka could only guess what unsavory details she had learned about her. “Haruka-chan, I hope you understand now how important you are to so many of us. How much we all care for you and want the best for you.” Haruka looked away, not able to digest such kind words. “That's really all I wanted to say. And I wanted to see for myself that you were safe.”

“Um, thank you, Hana-san. And… I'm sorry.”

“For what?”

“For what went down between Sh—Akiyama-san and you. It was my fault—”

“Don't give me none of that!” she cut her off. “It was entirely on Shun to stay faithful. You were just a girl trying to go to school. Still are.” Haruka didn't have the strength to argue that she was 18 now—still not a legal adult, she wouldn't be for another 2 years, but old enough to consent in Tokyo prefecture. That wouldn't make a difference in her eyes. “I was at fault, too. It was kind of a two-way street. At least mine was with a grown adult,” she said under her breath.

“Still, I just wanted to say sorry, anyway.”

“Well, I appreciate it all the same, I guess.” Hana-san stood back up and walked to the door. When her hand was on the handle, she called back, “Get better soon, ok?” and left.

Chapter Text

After her nightmares the previous night, Ojisan tried to stay with Haruka overnight again, but she wouldn't have it. She had to learn how to handle the nightmares on her own eventually—she wouldn't be with Ojisan forever.

Forever. 

As wonderful as the word is, it’s still bittersweet. There’s a beauty in forever in its intangibility, in its impossibility. And that’s the problem. It is impossible. Everything stops, everything ends, everything ceases to be eventually, no matter how much we try to protest or fight that inevitable truth.

She'd eventually move out, get a job, start a family. Oh, she was thinking about the future again. She hadn’t done that in a long time.

And, one day, Ojisan will die.

From a young age, she learned not to take her own life for granted, and she had lost enough people to know she could never guarantee how much more time she had with anyone she knew. But Ojisan was different. His life was never guaranteed either, but there was this unspoken understanding that if something happened to one of them, it would happen to both. They were a team, a pair, a union for so long. She hadn't allowed herself to consider the years that wouldn't be the case anymore.

She suddenly realized she was crying. A future without Ojisan was terrifying. What would she do? She felt so ill-equipped. Sure, she ran the orphanage with him and budgeted with him, raised the orphans with him. But doing any of that on her own?

She would miss him so much. He was the most important person in her life, and they only loved and cared for each other more as time went on. There would probably be years, if not decades, when she would still be alive, and he would not.

She started to loudly sob. No one else was there, she was allowed to be selfish in her feelings. The water ran for as long as it wanted. If she mourned him now, maybe that would make the eventual loss easier to bear.

But if she killed herself, she wouldn’t have to deal with any of that.

But if she killed herself, he’d have to deal with it instead.

Life was so cruel; death was so greedy.

She must've fallen asleep because she was suddenly awoken by nurses again, calming her down as she was screaming from the man finding her in her dreams again.

God, if only she could get a drink.

☆☆☆

Akiyama continued to call Haruka-chan early in the morning and late at night. Even during the day, he would frequently call or text her. But if she took too long to respond, he couldn’t stop texting her until she did, letting him know that she was still, in fact, alive. It got to the point where she would send him her itinerary for the day so he would know when she was at an appointment and not to disturb her.

😇🩷🌸Haruka-chan🌸🩷😇: i dont hav unlimited txt on my phone u kno

Me: Oh my god, I completely forgot I was texting your regular phone! Where's the one I gave you?

😇🩷🌸Haruka-chan🌸🩷😇: in my closet @ home

Me: Want me to bring it to you?

She told him where the spare key was and where in her closet she had stuffed the phone. Kiryu-san would be at the hospital after his shift until later that evening, and Akiyama had plenty of time after work to search for it.

He found the spare key hidden in one of the flowerpots and let himself in. He had never been in there completely alone before and was taken aback by the silence of it. The apartment had stayed as barren as when he first stepped in well over a year ago, and it only made the place even quieter. Despite all of that, there still was a feeling of her in the air. This was definitely her place.

He looked in the fridge. It was sadder than his own, filled with convenience store bentos, tauriners, staminans, premade onigiri, and some water. He fought the urge to go grocery shopping to restock it—Kiryu-san coming home to this sad state almost broke him. He shut the fridge, needing to step away.

There was the couch he had slept on. There was the little table he had studied for midterms with her on. There was the TV that was always playing some old movie. He walked down the little hall, the bathroom at the end barely four paces away. He looked in and was hit by the smell of her. She had been away for well over a week, but her cherry blossom smell lingered. He took a moment to savor it and found her shampoo bottle. He still had the one he bought for her in his own bathroom, but this one was used by her. He opened the bottle and brought it to his nose, taking in the scent of her. He stared at the tub. That’s where they found her. He shut the cap of the shampoo bottle and moved on to her bedroom.

Her futon was lying there, nicely made. She must've done that right before… He found her bottles, too, most of them empty now. There were so many, and only she knew how quickly she drank her way through them. They were set out right by her bookcase, and when he looked over at it, he nearly collapsed. Lying there on top of it, next to the photo of her, Kiryu-san, and the orphans, was a folded piece of paper, a cherry blossom branch brooch, and the necklace he had given her on Christmas Eve. He slowly walked over and gingerly moved his hand toward the piece of paper. He paused halfway and covered his mouth with his hand, trying to keep his emotions in check. 

I’m just so tired. This will make things easier for everyone, in the end.

I’m sorry Majima-san, Nishiki, Daigo-nii-san, Ayako, Taichi, Koji, Eri, Riona, Mitsuo, Shiro, Izumi. You all are my true family.

I’m sorry Akari-chan, Azusa-chan, Mai-chan. Your friendship has been more important to me than you could ever realize.

I love you, Ojisan. You have been more of a dad than my biological father could ever be.

I love you, Akiyama-san. Thank you for everything.

“So she did say it before me after all,” he said, voice shaking. He sniffled and scrunched the note in his fist, putting his fist to his hip as he used the sleeve of his other arm to clean his face. He looked up to the ceiling and blinked, taking deep breaths. He wasn’t sure about the significance of the brooch, but he knew that necklace anywhere. He grabbed it and placed it in his pocket to take with him to the hospital, then carefully tore off the bottom of the note so he could have her written out ‘I love you’. And so no one else would see it if anyone else happened to find it. He thought being in her room would make him happiest, but it was having the opposite effect. 

He walked over to her futon and lay down on it. His bed was much more comfortable. But this futon was hers. She would sleep in it every single night. It was completely taken over by her essence, despite not sleeping in it for well over a week. If only she were there now. They could fall asleep in each other's arms and stay that way til morning. He would love to do that with her.

He stood back up, realizing he had messed up the futon a bit. He fixed it as best he could, but Kiryu-san wouldn’t notice a little rustling. He found her closet and started digging in the drawers, searching for the phone he had given her. He found more and more of her in there. There was her straw hat, her school uniform was hanging up by the door, this drawer held the denim skirt she wore when they went to the gardens for the first time together. 

He also found her panties drawer. She wouldn't miss one, right? He looked for the pair she wore the night they made love, but, most likely, no one had done laundry since that night. He found her laundry basket. There it was. How could he forget? A classic white cotton with a little baby-blue bow.

He returned to the closet. After a little more digging, he found the phone. He grabbed the charging cable on his way out and took one last look around the place before leaving. He locked the door behind him and dropped the spare key back into the same potted plant.

Me: Found it! Can I come bring it to you now?

😇🩷🌸Haruka-chan🌸🩷😇: i wish u could jst come whenever & i wouldnt hav 2 tell ojisan 2 leave evry time

Me: I know. We'll have to go about it that way for a while longer, unfortunately.

😇🩷🌸Haruka-chan🌸🩷😇: i kno

😇🩷🌸Haruka-chan🌸🩷😇: ill txt u wen ojisan leaves 4 the nite i guess 

Me: I'll wait in the parking lot until he leaves so I can come in right after.

He drove to the hospital and waited. As he waited, the sun lowered, and the sky turned a bright orange. Somehow, sunsets still hadn’t lost their splendor, and he took a photo of it and sent it to Haruka-chan. How was it that sunsets in parking lots were always so much more dazzling than at any mountain or field of flowers?

Me: Sunsets always make me think of you.

😇🩷🌸Haruka-chan🌸🩷😇: (｡>\\<)

She responded with a photo of the sunset from her window. At least they were still under the same sky.

Kiryu-san eventually left after the sun dipped below the horizon. Visiting hours were almost over, and he ran all the way to his beloved, the nurses at the front desk waving at him with beaming smiles as he passed. He didn’t even stop to catch his breath when he arrived at her door.

“Haruka-chan!” he exclaimed as he threw the door open, planting his lips on hers before she even comprehended he was there. He pulled her in tight and stroked her hair.

“Akiy—Shu-chan, is everything ok?”

“I just missed you so much. I can't stand not being able to see you whenever I want.” He released her, keeping his hands on her shoulders, and darted his eyes around her face, taking in all of her. “How are you always even more beautiful than I remember whenever I see you?” She smiled. “Oh, right, your phone,” he said, digging in his pockets. He found it and handed it to her, along with its charging cable. “I'm sure you can hide it under all of this somehow,” he said, looking at the pile of cards and flowers on her bedside table.

“Yeah,” she said with a little laugh. He plugged it in for her and dug in one of his other pockets.

“I found this while I was there, too,” he said and pulled out her necklace. She covered her mouth with her hand. “Can I put it on you?” She nodded and turned so he could clasp it around her neck, lifting her ponytail so he could see better. She turned to face him again, fiddling with the stone. His face softened, and he stared at her.

“What?” she asked.

“I love you so much.” He kissed her softly but had to remove himself before he got too many ideas. That privacy curtain will be the death of him. “Where’s your charm bracelet?” She looked away from him.

“It’s… in a bag with everything else I was wearing when they brought me in.”

“Will you get that stuff back?”

“Not until I’m discharged.”

“I see.”

“I hear they sometimes have to cut up your clothes when they take you in. I hope they didn’t damage anything.”

“Were you wearing anything important besides the bracelet?”

“Clothes cost money, Shu-chan. All of it is important.”

“I can always just—”

“Buy me a replacement? That doesn’t mean I can’t be upset about losing something I spent Ojisan’s hard-earned money on.”

“You’re right, sorry.”

“It’s ok. You know, I… I decided to wear a white dress that night.”

“A white dress?”

“Yeah. After what we did the night before, it felt fitting. I didn’t think I’d ever get to say ‘I do’, so…”

“Oh, angel,” he said, wrapping his arms tightly around her, gently rocking her back and forth. He feared he was coming on too strong when he mentioned marriage when they were figuring out what she should call him, but he never imagined that she was thinking the same thing. He couldn’t believe it. He couldn’t even speak, fearing anything he said would make her reconsider. “I love you,” he opted for. How wonderful that he now could say it so easily.

“I love you, too.” He released her, stood up, and paced around the room, looking at every nook and cranny. “What is it?”

“Looking for a good vantage point.”

“Vantage point?”

“Yeah, I bought myself a little camera to put in your room to keep an eye on you. I won't call you so early in the morning as long as I can see you here, safe and sound.”

“You plan to spy on me?”

“I'm not going to be watching you 24/7. I just don't like not knowing if you're ok. If you're alive,” he said, looking back at her. She looked down at her hands, and he returned to searching. There was a shelf facing her bed that had some decorations he could hide the camera in, and he set it up. He went on about the technology of it and its efficiency and other such things as he did, then took out his phone. “It comes with an app. Look.” He opened the app, and the view from the camera came on screen. There they were, sitting on her hospital bed, looking at his phone. He watched her through the camera as she looked right at it and back at the phone again. “I can see you more clearly than I expected. And look,” he said, opening a menu. “It has night vision, too.” The screen changed, and everything turned light green, and he still saw her perfectly. He closed the app and put his phone away. “Just make sure you take it once you get discharged. I'm sure they'll easily trace it back to me if any of the staff found it.” She nodded, not as excited as he expected. “What's wrong?”

“I don't like being pried on without my knowledge.”

“Just assume I'm always looking, then.”

“What, like a panopticon or something?”

“Whoa, big word. Don't worry your pretty little head, ok?” He leaned in to kiss her forehead, but she leaned away. “What, are you doing something I shouldn't be seeing?” He remembered the phone call she got after making love. Did she really cut off all her contacts? Or was she just saying it so he would let it go? Last time he decided to give the woman he loved something private he had no awareness of, she used it to plan all of her liaisons with that Matthew guy or whatever.

“What? No! I just like having my alone, private time. How'd you feel if I had a camera on you all the time?”

“It wouldn't bother me.”

“Liar.”

“Well, if I tried to kill myself, I wouldn't mind you keeping an eye on me!” he said, raising his voice. She stared at him, eyes wide. “Haruka-chan. Please. The thought of losing you like that… I'd follow you there, understand?” She still didn't appear convinced. He stood from the bed and knelt on the floor beside her, taking her hands in his. “I love you so much,” he said, staring right into her beautiful brown eyes. “I've loved you for quite a while, and it only grows stronger every day. Please, give me this grace and let me do this. I just want to make sure I can still see that gorgeous little face of yours.” She sighed.

“Fine.”

“Thank you.” He stretched himself up and gave her a kiss before putting his hand on her cheek. “God, I'm so, so lucky.” She put her hand on his and smiled again.

“I'm the lucky one.”

Akiyama stayed until a nurse kicked him out again, which was well over an hour after visiting hours ended. Yuki-san was the one to find him again, and she wasn't quick to report him.

“You won't always be so lucky, sir,” she told him after she shut Haruka-chan’s door.

“I appreciate it all the same. Besides,” he said, looking through the window of Haruka-chan’s door. “I'm already the luckiest man in the world.”

☆☆☆

The threats of moving Haruka to the psychiatric unit slowed, as she pretended just well enough that she struggled walking and pretended just well enough that she felt better. She had done some research on psychiatric units in Japan, and she had hardly read a single good thing about them. She just might end up killing herself if they moved her to one.

And, honestly, she was starting to feel better. They had cycled through a few medications and found one that was working for her, and the crisis therapist she saw daily helped her a lot, providing activities and thought experiments, recommending various books to read to learn more about the problems she was dealing with, and helping her form plans for when she was in crisis again. She even had a night with no nightmares!

She had been awake for several days now, and the doctors kept reminding her to look out for any changes in her behavior or for any physical symptoms, both while in the hospital and after she eventually got discharged. The possible changes to who she was as a person scared her the most. No one said anything or noticed anything, she only hoped she would be ok.

She didn’t tell Shu-chan about Hana-san visiting, it wasn’t something he needed to know about. And, despite everything, a small part of her never let go of the fear that he might go back to her one day. The less he thought about his ex-wife, the better.

She had no idea how much he was watching her through the camera. She sometimes could hear a small electric sound coming from it and hoped that Ojisan would never notice it. He didn’t know the camera was there, the tiny whir could easily come from one of the monitors still connected to her. Still, she was grateful he was no longer calling her so early in the morning and late at night and that his panicked texting had subsided significantly. And she was certain that once she was discharged, he would slow down and understand that he didn’t need to keep such a close eye on her.

Chapter Text

Finally, after days of physical and mental therapy, Haruka was ready to be discharged. She wasn't done with treatment, not by a long shot. But she could at least finally go home.

She had a hard time sneaking the camera Shu-chan had planted out of the room without Ojisan or the nurses noticing and had to pretend she wanted to know where the decoration it was hiding in was from, but she got it.

At the front desk, as Ojisan collected her discharge papers, he asked when the bill would be sent.

“It's been paid off,” Yuki-san said with a smile. 

“That can't be right, I've not even given you any—”

“A Good Samaritan took care of it.” She gave Haruka a knowing smile. Only one person would've done this.

“Oh, wow, uh, that's great, fantastic even,” Ojisan said, processing the bewildering but welcome news. “How much was it?”

“He requested I not disclose that information.”

“ That's where you draw the line, Yuki-san?” the nurse on the computer next to her asked.

“Koyuki-chan, please, the nice man asked so politely.”

“And the law doesn't?”

“No, it doesn't. I'm glad you finally agree.” Koyuki-chan scoffed.

“You just listened to him because he's hot.”

“We agree on two things! Look at us, Koyuki-chan, we're bonding!” She scoffed again.

“Please.” She couldn't quite hide her smile, though.

“Alright, here are your papers and a list of your upcoming outpatient appointments. Do you have any final questions for us?”

“No, ma’am,” Ojisan said.

“Thank you for everything, Yuki-san,” Haruka said with a deep bow. “Please extend my gratitude to the rest of the staff.”

“Oh, such a fine young lady. Hard to miss what that man sees in you—”

“Let's go, Ojisan! I want to take a nice long bath,” Haruka cut in, grabbing Ojisan’s hand and pulling him toward the main doors leading outside.

“Oh, uh, ok. Thank you for everything!” he called back as they exited the automatic doors of the hospital.

☆☆☆

As soon as Haruka-chan texted him to tell him she was being discharged that afternoon, Akiyama called the hospital to pay off the entire bill. It was exorbitantly expensive, and he knew Kiryu-san’s savings wouldn’t cover it, even after what his insurance covered.

He dressed himself up in her favorite outfit and cologne again and drove to the hospital to wait for her in the parking lot, in a section not visible from her window. He knew Kiryu-san would be with her, so he couldn’t just meet her in the waiting room, but he had to watch her leave the hospital with his own eyes. She had taken down the camera, he couldn’t keep an eye on her anymore.

He wasn't quite sure how long he waited in the parking lot, but the sun traveled quite a distance across the sky. Finally, he saw her. She was dragging Kiryu-san out the doors while he wore a face of befuddlement. They continued to walk across the lot, Haruka not once looking his way, and turned the corner onto the sidewalk. Akiyama turned on his car, exited the lot by a different route, and drove until he pulled up beside them.

“Fancy seeing you two here!” he called out of the passenger-side window. Haruka-chan stammered, and Kiryu-san spoke for her.

“Hey, Akiyama-san,” he called back, without an air of doubt or suspicion in his voice. Perfect. “Haruka actually just got discharged from the hospital.” He patted Haruka-chan's shoulder, and she flinched before looking up at him.

“Oh, really? That's fantastic news. Hey, I'm in no hurry today, let me drive you two to your place.”

“Oh, no, please, you don't need to—”

“Yes, I do. Climb on in, I just so happened to clean out my car earlier today, so there's plenty of room.”

“Thank you, Akiyama-san. Come on, Haruka,” he said, patting her back to coax her over. She hesitated, not as thrilled to see him as he hoped. But she also was much better at acting the part of ‘just another student’ than he ever was.

“Thank you, Akiyama-sensei,” she finally said with a bow.

“Again with the ‘sensei’? Come on now, Haruka-chan,” he said, teasing.

“R-right, Akiyama-san.”

Kiryu-san took the front passenger seat, with Haruka-chan sitting in the back. She hadn’t sat in the back while he was driving her in years, it was like she was nine years old again. Did he still have that stash of lollipops in this rusty old vehicle somewhere? Though watching her lick a lollipop now would give him an entirely different feeling than it did when she was little, he probably shouldn’t search for any while her dad was in the car.

While he couldn’t request Haruka-chan sit in the front beside him instead, it was probably for the best. He would struggle to keep his hands off of her for the entire drive. At least he didn't need to pretend that he didn't know how to get to her place. He once lived there for a few days, after all. They didn't talk much during the drive, there weren't many light topics of conversation to be had.

He helped them take up her stuff after parking. Any excuse to be around her just a little longer.

“How about I take you two out for some food, hm? To celebrate Haruka-chan being discharged,” Akiyama offered. “Probably a nice change after a bunch of hospital food.”

“Oh, no, please, Akiyama-san, you don't need to go out of your way—” Kiryu-san was saying.

“I insist.”

He ended up taking them to Sushi Gin. What a coincidence that it was one of Haruka-chan's favorite places. They sat at the counter, Haruka-chan between the two men. Kiryu-san tried to sit in the middle instead, but Akiyama was quick on his feet and sat beside her. After eating some good food and drinking some good sake, conversation flowed more easily. And so did Akiyama's hands.

At first, he simply sat on the stool in such a way that his knee would touch Haruka-chan's thigh. Over time, he shifted closer and put his foot on the bar of her stool, his leg making more contact with her. He slowly turned as he conversed with Kiryu-san until his entire front was facing her instead of the counter. Kiryu-san never acknowledged what he was doing, the sake making him even more oblivious than usual. At some point, Kiryu-san excused himself to go to the bathroom, and once the bathroom door closed, Akiyama pulled Haruka-chan's stool as close to him as possible, wrapped his arms around her, and planted his lips firmly onto hers with a dip, in front of the whole restaurant.

“Akiyama-san!” she shout-whispered. He just gave her a smug smile.

“What? Don't you want me to kiss you?”

“Not here!” she continued to shout-whisper.

“Come on, it's fiiiiiine.” She looked away and returned to her sushi. He didn't push her stool back to where it was, instead keeping her right there with him. He leaned on his elbow on the counter and simply stared at her with a tender smile.

“What?” she asked once she noticed him.

“I missed you so much,” he responded, patting her head with his hand, and she smiled. He kissed her on the top of her head and quickly returned to his sushi when Kiryu-san returned from the bathroom. But Haruka-chan’s stool stayed directly next to him.

Akiyama couldn't think of any more excuses to stay around his beloved and regretfully left after dropping her and Kiryu-san back off at their apartment. But, instead of going straight home, he parked around the corner where he always parked to meet her and checked his phone. Yep, he could see her futon clearly through the camera he had planted in her room after retrieving it from her belongings while they were settling in. Oh, and look, she's walking into frame right now.

He watched her move about her room, checking shelves and drawers, unpacking her bag, and generally reorienting herself. But he could only see her from that one room, and soon she left. He turned up the volume and could hear her talking to Kiryu-san about something, though he couldn't quite make out what.

He knew where the spare key was now, though. And money was no object to him. He could plant some more cameras while the apartment was empty. He didn't like not being able to check on her for even a moment and was already feeling anxious that he couldn't see her right then, only vaguely hear her.

As soon as he got home, he researched the best cameras on the market for his needs. After digging deep on websites that he never wanted to return to, he found a company that sold tiny wireless cameras that often were used by governments and corporations. No one should see these bad boys. Of course, he had to be careful to put them where neither she nor Kiryu-san could notice them while still having a view of every square inch of the apartment. The corner that gets missed could be the corner in which she kills herself.

He hated that he had to wait two whole days for the cameras to even arrive at the drop spot, and then who knew how long he had to wait before he could set them all up. He would just have to settle with the one camera and calling and texting her when he couldn’t see her. At least she was going to school tomorrow. She had promised him that much.

And she made good on that promise, too. After sending her a ‘good morning’ text as soon as his eyes opened, Akiyama opened the app for the camera. She was lying on her futon and reading his text, Kiryu-san lying next to her with his arm around her waist. She must have had more nightmares the night before. Seconds later, he received her ‘good morning’ text as she hid her phone under her futon. She then sat up, stretched her arms high, and groaned before yawning. He watched her stand and walk out of the room, and he could hear her making breakfast in their little kitchen.

Akiyama kept the app open as he got ready for the day, looking at it between bites of breakfast, before and after putting on each item of clothing, staring at it while he brushed his teeth.

She walked in and out of the room, of her closet, of the bathroom. The camera was angled in a way that the edge of the bathroom door was just enough in view that he could see whenever it was opened or closed. Each time she walked into the bathroom, dread built within his stomach, and he could barely breathe until she stepped out again. He had a hard time keeping an eye on her as she got changed, though. That’s when he really felt like he was snooping. But she was so gorgeous, and he hardly ever saw her like that. Her scars were still visible through the camera, proof that he was doing the right thing by keeping an eye on her.

He heard her call out to Kiryu-san that she was leaving, and the front door clicked open and banged shut. He dashed to his car and began to drive, finding and following her walking route he had walked with her on over a year ago until he found her.

“Sawamura-san! Walking to school?” he called out from his car as he pulled over beside her. She raised a brow.

“Yeah? What are you doing here? School’s that way,” she said, pointing in the direction she was walking, which was the opposite of where he was driving.

“I got lost?”

“Bullshit.”

“Why do you swear so much these days? That Osawa-san girl is a bad influence.”

“Azusa-chan just says it like it is. And don’t change the subject, you were looking for me, weren’t you?” she accused, pointing at him.

“I just wanted to make sure you got to school safe, ok? Here, climb in the car. I don’t want you to decide to run into traffic.”

“Oh my god, you’re being ridiculous!”

“Well, what do you expect from me!?” He then realized he was shouting and noticed another student walking past them, watching the shouting match. “Just get in, ok?” Haruka-chan huffed and looked at another two students who were walking up the road not far from them. She turned and walked a few steps away from him before pulling out her phone and typing.

😇🩷🌸Haruka-chan🌸🩷😇: im not getting in ur car in front of all my classmates!

😇🩷🌸Haruka-chan🌸🩷😇: the rumors will only start again!

She wasn’t wrong. And the rumors were part of what made her life such a living hell to begin with. But he couldn’t stand just letting her walk away from him.

Me: I’ll pull up around the corner, come meet me there and you can hide on the floor of the back seat.

She looked at him with disgust and walked off. He swore under his breath and drove, looking for a place he could park. If she wasn’t going to drive with him, he was going to walk with her. He parked in a nearby lot, not caring if it got towed or broken into—he should probably replace the hunk of junk anyway. He climbed out, slammed the car door behind him, and ran until she was in view. He wasn’t going to run all the way up to her and walk next to her, that would just be stupid. No, he’d just follow from a healthy distance, watching her every move.

Every corner she turned spiked his anxiety, and he would run to reach the corner to see her as soon as possible, then wait until she was far enough away again as he caught his breath. He received some looks from the other students walking to school, and he only hoped none of them noticed that it was specifically Haruka-chan he was following.

Once he watched her enter the front of the school building, he could finally calm down. She should be safe there, he couldn’t think of any threats. And she was probably going to run into her friends there, too. He walked over to the faculty entrance, ready to start his day and see her again in homeroom.

The longer it took Haruka-chan to get to homeroom, the more nervous he got. There weren't any security cameras in the school he could snoop on, and it was impractical to think he could put up cameras that covered every inch of the school to watch her.

Me: Angel, where are you?

Me: You're not in homeroom yet, are you safe?

His breath grew shallower with every passing second that she didn’t respond.

😇🩷🌸Haruka-chan🌸🩷😇: omg im in the bathroom calm down

The bathroom? But that's where she… where she tried to…

Me: Which one!? Are your friends there!?

😇🩷🌸Haruka-chan🌸🩷😇: on the 1st floor by the shoe lockers?

😇🩷🌸Haruka-chan🌸🩷😇: yeah there all here

😇🩷🌸Haruka-chan🌸🩷😇: they jst wanna catch up b4 class thts all

Me: Are you telling the truth?

😇🩷🌸Haruka-chan🌸🩷😇: yeah?

Haruka-chan was always so good at lying. How could he possibly believe her unless he saw her for himself? He ran out of the classroom and bounded down the stairs until he was on the first floor, steadying his breath as he jogged to the bathrooms by the shoe lockers. He wasn’t about to walk into the girl’s bathroom, that would just be silly. But he could try to listen in. He leaned his back against the wall next to the girl’s bathroom door, closed his eyes, and listened. There were definitely girls in there, but it was hard to discern voices. In his focus on listening for voices, he didn’t listen for footsteps, and the bathroom door suddenly swung open. There, four sets of eyes rested upon him. One was that pair of beautiful brown eyes that he loved so much.

“Akiyama-sensei, what are you doing here!?” his angel said.

“Oh, Haru—Sawamura-san, good morning. Natsukawa-san, Osawa-san, Sanada-san,” he greeted, relaxed smile on his face. Three out of the four girls looked happy to see him, and he watched them walk to the second-year classrooms.

Me: What’s wrong? You seemed upset to see me.

😇🩷🌸Haruka-chan🌸🩷😇: yeah cuz i was!

😇🩷🌸Haruka-chan🌸🩷😇: r u gonna keep following me everywhere?

Me: I just want to make sure you’re safe.

Me: Are you hiding something from me that you don’t want me to know about?

😇🩷🌸Haruka-chan🌸🩷😇: no!!

😇🩷🌸Haruka-chan🌸🩷😇: omg get over urself

Me: Why are you mad at me?

😇🩷🌸Haruka-chan🌸🩷😇: ur being so dramatic

😇🩷🌸Haruka-chan🌸🩷😇: just put on the brakes a little ok?

😇🩷🌸Haruka-chan🌸🩷😇: they wouldnt have discharged me from the hospital if they thought i was still in danger

But you’re so good at lying, you could’ve just lied about how you were feeling so that they’d discharge you early.

Me: Ok, I understand. I’ll stop being around you.

😇🩷🌸Haruka-chan🌸🩷😇: omg u kno thats not what i mean

😇🩷🌸Haruka-chan🌸🩷😇: stop being difficult

Akiyama reached the classroom and didn’t look her way as he entered.

☆☆☆

Mayflower’s blog:

Entry #78

hey everybody （＾ω＾）

who has 2 thums & is no longer in teh hospital

THIS GIRLIE!!!!!  ＼(≧▽≦)／

so glad 2 b outta there

i missed my futon & my bath & ive got waaaaaaay more freedom agai

A has been a bit paranoid tho

always askin were i am or who im wit or wat im doing

he followed me 2 & from skool & im p sure he snooped on me while i was eatin lunch (*￣m￣)

its 2 cold 2 eat outside so its not like he could jst sit on teh other side of teh feeld from me

we used 2 do tht 2 pretend 2 eat lunch together but now it feels lyke hed want 2 do tht jst 2 spy on me sum more

the attenshon is a lil much & i dont want my classmates 2 start spreadin rumors again

but i get it

my dad hsnt been so obsessive but he got 2 c me alot more during my treatment while A was left in teh dark 4 most of it

kinda wish hed jst calm down & back off a bit

but i still love him ♡(*´･ω･)♡

c u later

Chapter Text

Usami

“We’re going to visit your great uncle,” Usami’s father told him during one of his rare visits. “He doesn’t have much longer, and I think there’s something he needs to tell you.”

“Me? What would—” A smack on his cheek.

“Don’t question me.”

“Yes, sir.”

The two piled into a limo that was waiting outside of his father’s house, and they rode to Yokohama in silence.

An hour later, as they entered a residential area, his father finally broke the silence.

“Yuta, do you know what I do for a living?”

“No, sir.”

“Figured. Your mother never knew the whole truth, either.” Usami didn’t respond. His father sighed. “You’re going to learn today. You’re going to learn a lot, in fact.”

“Really?” His father nodded. Usami had a hard time hiding his smile.

The limo parked in front of a large gate, sitting between walls surrounding the property, several meters high. The driver stepped out and opened the door for the two passengers, and Usami and his father climbed out. The limo drove off, and Usami stared up at the impressive Chinese-style gate.

“Welcome, son. This is happening sooner than I planned, so be grateful. Close your mouth,” he said when he saw Usami gazing in awe. Usami did and stared straight ahead. The enormous doors of the gate opened, one man pulling each door with difficulty. The view now displayed before them was even more impressive—a stone path crossed the large courtyard the gate opened into, wooden buildings painted red with xieshan roofs surrounding it, stone and sand gardens with ponds dotting the area. Beyond the building that the stone path led to was another courtyard visible through the open doors. Lining the stone pathway were men in white Tang suits with golden and green embroidery. 

Wordlessly, his father walked through the gate, and Usami followed a few paces behind him. As they passed, the men bowed, welcoming them. Or, at least, that’s what Usami assumed “Nǐ huí lái le” meant. He had a hard time not pausing at every step, taking in the beautiful surroundings. 

“Yuta!” He ran up to his father, posture straightened. They walked through the building at the end of the stone path into the second courtyard, walking on another stone path with more men welcoming them. Across this second courtyard was one large multistory building, golden patterns painted all over the red. “Yuta. Do not speak unless spoken to. Do not look at him even when speaking. And do not let your face show any emotion. Plenty of what you will hear today will be new, and you may have questions. Do not ask any.” Usami stood straight, determination on his face. “That’s not neutral.” He relaxed his face. “Better. Come.”

He led Usami into the large building. Inside, it was strikingly dark. A scant few paper lanterns were in the corners, but no electric lights were lit. Across the room was a set of double doors, red carpet leading to it. When they reached it, his father knocked three times.

“Jìnrù,” an elderly voice called from the other side. Usami took one last look at his father, then returned to the approved stance as his father opened the door.

The room was equally poorly lit, with an old man lying on a futon on the floor, large silk quilt laid neatly over him. A strong scent of incense wafted in from some invisible corner of the room. His father approached and kneeled beside him, and Usami kneeled as well.

“Uncle.”

“Ah, Lao Da, huānyíng. Wǒ—”

“Forgive me, Uncle, but may we speak in Japanese?”

“Oh? Who have you brought with you?”

“My son, Hao Qiang.” Usami’s breath caught. Was this what his father warned him not to react to?

“Ah, I see. So you never taught him the language of our homeland. Still, this is wonderful. I haven’t seen your boy since he was an infant.”

“Yes, it has been quite some time.” The old man coughed.

“Thank you for making the journey here.”

“Thank you for inviting us. I would be happy to see you in Yunnan if you asked.” The old man chuckled.

“You always were so ingratiating, Lao Da. Do you know why I’ve summoned you here?”

“I assume it’s because of your health.”

“Indeed. I fear I have less time than I had bargained for, and now I have too many loose ends to tie up.” He waited. “It has to do with the inheritance of this Triad.”

“I see.”

“I can’t give it to just anyone, you know. But I have too few relatives to pass it on to. I thought I was making things easier for myself by limiting the relationships those within the Triad can have, but now…”

“Are you not satisfied with the options you have?”

“No.” His father’s fists clenched for just the briefest of moments. “Listen, Lao Da, I know you were hoping to inherit this Triad since my brother, your father, passed years ago. But you don’t have what it takes. I can’t give it to you.”

“I see.”

“Hao Qiang, come here, my boy.” He reached his hand out from under the blanket. Usami looked at his father, who moved aside so he could kneel next to him. The old man took his hand, and Usami made sure not to look him in the eye. “How would you feel about running this Triad—”

“He’s just a boy! He knows nothing—!”

“Silence!” His father clammed up and looked to the floor. “You look so much like your mother,” he said to Usami. “She was a beautiful girl the one time I met her, not long after you were born. Her name was… Hirose Miyako, yes?” Usami nodded. “How is she?” Usami looked back over his shoulder. His father didn’t look up at him.

“She’s… doing fine. She works hard and provides for me.”

“Does she love you?”

“Of course. And I love her too.”

“What about your father?”

“...what about him?”

“Does he love you?” Usami struggled to answer. The old man nodded. “That’s what I thought.”

“You always told me family was a weakness,” his father said angrily.

“And yet you married and bore a son. Or was that only to increase your chances of getting the Triad?” His father didn’t respond. Usami didn’t know if he wanted to look at his father or not. He didn’t move. “Well, answer my question, boy. How would you feel about running this Triad?” Usami thought for a moment.

“I’m sorry, sir, but I’d have to decline. I never knew about this Triad. I know nothing of its influence, its power structure, its rules, its assets, nothing. I can’t even take the lead in a group project at school. I would be unfit to run this Triad.” The old man’s eyes lit up.

“It’s that kind of thinking that would make you great. To consider so many things when you knew nothing of this Triad’s existence when you awoke this morning and to be humble and practical enough to see it as beyond your capability… It shows great maturity.” Usami didn’t know how to respond. If he had been asked a year ago, even a few months ago, he would have responded differently. But Sawamura-chan’s situation put a lot into perspective for him. She was brave, and strong, and smart, and kind, and yet even she struggled as much as she had. And he realized he couldn’t be the one to save and protect her. The work he put into himself to make himself worthy of her was paying off. “Your mother did well.”

“Yes, she did.”

“Do you think your father did well, too?” Usami said nothing. “Regarding my will. I still haven’t completed it yet. I wanted to meet with all my potential inheritors before making a final decision. I only have one person left, but they’re hard to find.”

“Can we help you?” Usami’s father asked.

“Perhaps. It’s my daughter.”

“You have a daughter?”

“Yes, I’m a hypocrite, I know. She’s in Japan, that I know. But beyond that… I’m not sure. She certainly doesn’t go by her Chinese name, Xiao Qiao. I have some leads on who she might be, but nothing concrete. And I can’t have too many people out looking for her, I can’t have people knowing I have a living child.”

“Of course.”

“I had a son, too, but he was killed, oh, decades ago now. He would’ve been my first choice if he were still here. Anyway, I never put in the effort to find her, so I’m starting from scratch. I don’t know what help you can provide.”

“We will do anything we can.” The old man chuckled.

“You never change. If I need your aid, I’ll send a message.”

“Of course.”

“Hao Qiang. Take some time to consider. I have many people in my ranks I trust that can provide you guidance.”

“Yes, sir.” The old man nodded.

“Now, go. I grow weary from conversations these days.” He coughed. Usami’s father shifted back up next to him and bowed deeply.

“Thank you for granting us audience, Uncle.” Usami also bowed. The old man dismissed them with a wave, and they both stood and left.

☆☆☆

It didn’t take long for the silent drive home to become not so silent.

“Why didn’t you tell me about any of this?” Usami asked his father, not looking at him. His father sighed.

“I thought I’d have more time. And that I’d be the one to inherit the Triad after my father, your grandfather, died.” Usami sat silent, turning over the conversation he had with the old man in his mind.

“Is it true that you only had me as insurance? To increase your chances of running the Triad? I’d just be your puppet, right?” His father said nothing, didn’t even look at him. “And what about our names? He called you something I’ve never heard anyone call you. And you called me… what, ‘how much’?”

“It’s Hao Qiang. It means ‘vast strength’. That’s your Chinese name. Your real name.”

“What do you mean?”

“Your birth certificate doesn’t say ‘Usami Yuta’. It says ‘Lang Hao Qiang’.”

“Does… does mom know?”

“Well she had to sign the damn thing, I sure would hope so.”

“And she never told me either?”

“We agreed not to tell you. It was one of the few things we ever agreed on.” Usami was dumbfounded. He slouched back in his chair, bewildered. He stammered, trying to latch onto one of the million questions floating in his mind.

“Does she know about all this?”

“You know more than she does now. She knew my wealth came from something under the table and that it was a family business. Nothing else. And you won’t tell her about anything you saw or heard today.”

“Why shouldn’t I?”

“The less people who know about anything like this, the better.” Usami started to wonder if it was worth obeying his father anymore.

“And, his daughter. She’d be your cousin, right? You didn’t know about her?”

“No. He always said family was a weakness and discouraged anyone within the Triad from having relationships or children or even keeping in contact with any other relatives. I never thought to ask if he had any of his own.”

“How would we find her?”

“I don’t know.”

The rest of the drive was as silent as the drive over. As soon as they got back to his father’s house, Usami packed up his things and walked back to his mom’s apartment.

Majima

“Can’t ya drive any faster?”

“I’m sorry, sir, but I have to obey the speed limit.”

“Psh, not like this is tracked by GPS or nothin’.”

“We don’t have much farther to go.”

Majima was taking a taxi ride to Ijincho. The Florist asked him to go down there—one of his contacts had gone AWOL, and he promised Majima that the next thing he would ask of him would be on the house if he did this. He was already trying to decide what that would be. Hell, he might be able to get some more information on the Snake Flower Triad while he was out there.

He was dropped off in the bar district. He was instructed to go to Survive Bar, where he would meet up with one of the subordinates of The Florist’s missing contacts.

The bartender was a foreigner, sporting a large forehead with blonde hair and aviator sunglasses, but his grasp on Japanese was surprisingly solid. Majima got himself a Bloody Mary and waited. The bar itself was empty outside of him and the bartender, and he glanced around to get any read on what kind of place this actually was. It seemed normal enough, it even had a karaoke set. While he was deciding whether to have a crack at it, someone walked down the stairs in the back and sat at his table. He was wearing an oversized black jacket with the hood up, face covered by a balaclava. While it was December, it wasn’t chilly enough for that getup, especially inside.

“Pleasure to meet you, Majima-san. I’m quite familiar with your work as a—”

“Yeah, yeah, pleasure's all mine, whatever. Get to the point.”

“Alright. I’m from the Geomijul, are you familiar—”

“The Florist gave me a run down. You guys got all the information in the world about this city, right?”

“Just so. Well, despite our giant web of information, our leader has managed to completely vanish.”

“Ya check your blind spots?”

“We don’t have any.”

“There’s always a blind spot,” Majima said, pointing at his eyepatch.

“I assure you, Majima-san, we don’t have any.”

“Alright, fine. Your leader, tell me about him.”

“ Her name is Seonhee,” he said, pulling out a photo of her. Quite the looker. “Thirty-one years old. A cunning, ruthless woman who knows what she wants and gets it. But she is also dearly beloved by everyone in the organization.”

“Maybe she wanted to leave, then.”

“Believe me, Majima-san, I have considered every possibility regarding her disappearance. Including it being of her own volition. But I can think of no reason why she would.”

“Alright. Well, I’d like to see for myself how airtight this whole operation of yours is.”

“Fine. The Florist trusts you enough to send you out here to help us. And if you try anything, we’ll know. Midnight, tonight, Eomeoni's Vow, Koreatown.” The man stood and left without even making sure Majima could make it. He’d have to.

He had plenty of time to stew and think while waiting. About Makoto. About Haruka-chan. About this Seonhee character. So many women causing trouble. He loved it. 

After spending some more time in the bar, breaking in the karaoke machine, having another bloody mary, and figuring out where to even find this “Eomeoni's Vow”, he walked to that restaurant and waited some more.

Midnight, on the dot, the door to the kitchen opened. Without even checking, Majima walked straight through. Several individuals clad in black were waiting for him.

“Ya not gonna try to jump me, are ya?”

“No, Majima-san, we’re not in the mood to die tonight,” said a man now standing beside him, who had the same voice and outfit as the man he spoke to at the bar.

Majima’s brow twitched. He still hated The Florist for taking advantage of him and causing him to break his 19-year-long no-kill streak at the docks. But he was still an invaluable resource.

Completely surrounded, he was guided by the men in black through the back door of the kitchen. They walked up and down fire escapes, through twisting alleys, man-made blockades, until somehow, and Majima wasn’t even sure how they actually got there, they were inside a large control room, covered wall to wall, floor to ceiling with screens.

“Huh. Who was first, The Florist or you guys?”

“Us, naturally. But what The Florist achieved on his own is quite impressive compared to what we had to do as a whole organization,” the man he had spoken to earlier said. As he spoke, he lowered his hood and removed the balaclava. Majima wasn’t expecting such a handsome man underneath, hair dyed to be stark white, and was he wearing guy-liner? “My name is Han Joongi. Second-in-command of the Geomijul.” Majima nodded in greeting.

“So, show me what you can see on all these,” Majima said, gesturing at the screens surrounding them. Han took some time to show him what they were capable of seeing. Everywhere Majima pointed on the screen as a potential blind spot, they showed him a new angle that had that spot in full view.

“What about the sewers?”

“We have cameras on every manhole cover and every entrance and exit we were able to locate when first setting this operation up, updating as the city went under construction.”

“Anywhere under construction now?”

“We have cameras there, too.”

“On every single angle? I doubt it. When was Seonhee last seen?”

Han described to him the last day Seonhee was seen. It was a bit over a week ago, and she was walking through Chinatown late at night. They showed the video of her walking, wearing a trench coat, hat, and sunglasses. But her pink hair was still visible. It was almost like she was trying to be suspicious. She walked into a restaurant, and they switched the view to the interior. 

She wasn’t there.

They moved forward and backward in time, but at no point did the camera from inside the restaurant show her opening that door.

“Ya sure it’s the right restaurant? The right day?”

“100%.”

“Maybe someone doctored the footage. Recorded over the original.”

“We considered it, but it would be an incredible feat. Very few of us have access to the recordings, and even fewer have the ability to doctor them.”

“Ain’t you all computer wizards? You’d be able to figure out a way around it if ya tried hard enough.”

“Believe it or not, most of us here don’t have those skills. Part of that is on purpose, the less people know how to manipulate our setup, the better. But, also, just about everyone here is an exponent of the Jingweon mafia. You familiar with them?”

“Oh, yeah, more than familiar.”

“Well, since they’re a bunch of old-school mafia grunts, most of them never even had the opportunity to learn about computers. It’s safer this way.”

“I see. Where is this restaurant? I wanna check it out myself.”

Han led Majima to Chinatown, to the restaurant Seonhee somehow did and didn’t enter, Heian Tower. Han was on edge the entire time.

“What’s eatin’ ya? You scared you’re gonna get spirited away, too?”

“I mean, if someone so cunning was able to take even Seonhee, we don’t stand a chance.” Majima scoffed.

“We’re fine.”

By the time they reached the restaurant, it was already past 1 am. The doors were locked, no lights were on.

“We breakin’ in?”

“Just wait.” Soon, Majima heard some loud clicks coming from the doors, and they swung wide open. They opened into a small vestibule, curtains draped on either side to give an air of luxury, before another set of doors swung open before them again, leading into the reception area of the restaurant.

“Your guys?”

“Actually, the owner. We have plenty of dirt on him, he’s more than happy to cooperate.”

“Hm.”

They walked into the reception area. The place was massive, with multiple floors and multiple private dining rooms, and it was the epitome of opulence, with large chandeliers, giant Ming Dynasty-style vases, and jade fu dog statues guarding each hall. A man sporting a bright red vest approached from one of the private rooms.

“Welcome, Han-sama and esteemed guest.”

“Name’s Majima.”

“Majima-sama.”

“Majima-san, this is Wong, the owner of this fine establishment. Wong, this is Majima-san, sent to help us locate our Queen of Geomijul.”

“Ah, I see. Well, please, have a seat,” he said, gesturing towards the private room he just came from. “My chefs are making our specialty Peking duck.”

“Oh, please, you don’t have to—”

“Of course I do,” the owner cut off Han. The three sat around the ornately carved table, white tablecloth laid over top, hosting dishes upon dishes of rice, soup, pickled vegetables, dumplings, and many others. Majima leaned forward on the table and stared the owner down.

“Where’s Seonhee?”

“You don’t play around, do you, Majima-sama.”

“Ain’t got the time.” The owner nodded.

“Well, I’m afraid I don’t know where she is.”

“Bullshit—”

“Majima-san,” Han warned. Majima stood and put his foot right up on the table.

“You know where she is, Wang. You’re a terrible liar—”

“Majima-san!”

The owner put up his hands in defense. “I’m being honest. I don’t know where she is. I didn’t even know she walked in here.”

“Yeah? Ya sure? She’s pretty hard to miss.” It was then that a waiter wheeled in a cart that was carrying a tray, cloche on top.

“Ah, the Peking duck. Please, Majima-sama, at least sit and enjoy our food. Peking duck is our specialty.”

“So I’ve heard.” Majima sat down in his chair as the waiter pushed the cart next to the owner and placed the tray in front of him. “What, ya not gonna serve the guests first?”

“I need to make sure it is up to our house standards first.” The waiter lifted the cloche.

The owner was sitting dead in the chair, bullet hole in his head, the waiter on the floor having suffered the same fate. Han was holding a gun, pointed toward the now dead men, a second gun still lying cold on the tray that was under the cloche. Majima only flinched at the sudden bang of the gun and slouched back in his chair.

“You’re not even going to ask why?” Han asked.

“I was in the yakuza, shit like that happens all the time. Figured he probably didn’t want the dirt you had on him hanging over his head anymore. Or he knew something about Seonhee, but I doubt it.”

“Oh? Why’s that?”

“This isn’t the restaurant she walked into. Because that wasn’t her on the monitor, was it?”

Chapter Text

Tuesday, 16 December 2014

Me: Haruka-chan, let’s go on a date.

😇🩷🌸Haruka-chan🌸🩷😇: a d8?

Me: Yeah, a date.

Me: We haven’t spent time just the two of us together since before you went to the hospital.

Me: Since we did the deed (˶’◡˘)♡

😇🩷🌸Haruka-chan🌸🩷😇: (⁄ ⁄•⁄ω⁄•⁄ ⁄) ig ur rite

Me: I guess we can't go anywhere nearby.

Me: How about something simple at my place?

😇🩷🌸Haruka-chan🌸🩷😇: ok sounds good

😇🩷🌸Haruka-chan🌸🩷😇: how abt 2nite?

Me: I've already cleaned my apartment just in case you said that ♡(.◜ω◝.)♡

Akiyama was an anxious wreck up until she finally knocked on his door. She told him she was going home to change first before going to his place, and the camera in her room proved that to be true. But he had no idea if she was safe during her travels between places. He should have picked her up.

Then she knocked on his door and he ran to it, swinging it open to see her smiling face. He picked her up in a hug, lifting her off the ground and swaying side to side. He held her tightly, needing the constant reminder that she was still there, alive, right in front of him, the girl he loved so much. And she held him just as tightly. He carried her into his apartment and regretfully put her back on the floor so she could take her shoes off.

“What do you want to do?” she asked him.

You.

“Let’s just hang out on the couch and watch a movie or something. I just want to be with you. Delivery for dinner?”

They curled up on the couch, limbs tangled up with each other, finding every possible way to be closer, every possible spot they could be touching. God, he’d missed this so much. Her hair was right by his face, and he breathed in that lovely cherry blossom scent from her shampoo. Only when the delivery driver knocked on his front door did he get up, and even then, they stayed as wrapped up as possible as they ate, her sitting on his lap, his arms wrapped around her as he held his food.

After they finished eating and returned to their previous position, spooning on the couch, a sex scene came on screen. Akiyama had been thinking about doing that to her all day, and his cock was quickly hardening. She must’ve felt it against her back, because she started leaning into it, slowly grinding against it. She turned around, and their lips met. Slow, gentle, casual kisses were shared between them, and Akiyama wrapped his arms around her even tighter, if such a thing was possible. His knee separated her legs, and she started moving her hips against him.

“While I was at the hospital,” she breathed out, “I had them put me on birth control.” He stopped and stared at her, stunned. She was thinking about something like that even then? God, that was hot.

“I'd like us both to get tested first, just in case.”

“Both?”

“Just for my own peace of mind—”

“You think I was fucking my buyers or something!?” she raised her voice, sitting up.

“No, no, that's not it! There's a couple diseases that could get passed from a mother to her child, that's all!” Akiyama was grateful to remember that little fact in that moment, because he did, in fact, fear that he wasn't her only. Or even her first.

“You think my mom was a whore—!?”

“No! It could've easily been given to her by your dad for all we know! If there even was anything!” 

“And why should you get tested!? Were you out messing around while I was in a coma—!?”

“No! Remember Hana was cheating on me!? I don't know if she gave me something!” Haruka-chan still looked livid at the exchange they had, but at least she stopped talking back. She suddenly grabbed his collar and smashed his lips onto hers and he immediately reciprocated, roughly and with a deep desire suddenly being released. Breaths heavy, they were too impatient to even get undressed, and she dove her hand in his pants. He moaned loudly at the sudden touch, and she did her best to stroke him under his pants.

He undid his buckle and lowered his pants just enough so she had easy access, and pulled down her leggings right after, her skirt short enough for him to move his fingers as he pleased. His fingers slid into her so easily, and he was aroused even more by the knowledge that he had the power to make her so wet. He kissed her neck as she tilted her head back. They were so close to each other, it would be so easy for him to slip inside her. He couldn't wait to take full advantage of her birth control.

“Wait here,” he breathed out and ran to his dresser (or at least as best he could, his lowered pants hindering him), and grabbed the box of condoms. He threw his pants off while there so he could be even quicker to get back to her, and found her completely bare from the waist down, ready to take all of him in her. He kneeled on the couch, her legs outstretched on either side of him, and carefully but quickly unwrapped the condom onto himself. He didn't hesitate like he did last time, her horny face was more than enough. He still was careful to lay over her, resting a hand on the arm of the couch by her head as he used his other to guide himself inside her. God, she felt just as wonderful as she did the first time. And she will the next time. And the next. And every time after, forever, as far as he was concerned.

She took in a sharp breath as he entered her, and he rested himself on her, wrapping his arms around her to keep her tightly against him. She wrapped her legs around his hips, arms resting on his shoulders. He thrust slowly at first but didn't take his time to quicken the pace. He used his hand to lift her hips upward to angle himself better, and quickly slammed himself inside her, his tip reaching all the way to her womb.

“Oh my god, oh my god,” she moaned into his ear as he continued to pound roughly into her. He groaned involuntarily and returned his lips to hers, slowing his pace a little, changing his hard thrusts into sensual bucks of his hips. He felt her pulling at his shirt, and he sat up to pull it off, now completely naked before her. She looked at him with such a deep lust, a finger to her lips, and smiled. He smiled in return and brought his lips back to hers, breathing heavily.

“I love you, Haruka-chan. I love you so much,” he said between kisses as he slowly pushed himself in and out of her, the initial energy having dissipated. Now he just wanted to enjoy the simple pleasure of making love with the one he loved. He had to, he had no idea what tomorrow might bring.

☆☆☆

The cameras arrived. Now Akiyama just needed to find the right time to put them up. And the right person.

One of his clients happened to be an electrician who urgently needed money to pay off some loan sharks. Akiyama had to get his hands dirty to convince the sharks that he owed 10 million yen instead of 100 million, but nothing his kicks couldn’t handle. Now he was in the process of paying off that 10 million yen, and all Akiyama had to do was tell him he’d reduce what he owed by an additional million if he did this little favor for him.

The guy knew better than to ask questions and got the job done in under two hours, in the middle of the day while the apartment was empty. Akiyama checked all the cameras through his phone to check for blind spots, had the guy send him photos of where the cameras were located so he knew for sure they were well hidden, and updated the log in Sky Finance. Hana was probably going to throw a fit about it, but she hadn’t contacted him in over a year, so he wasn’t worried.

He found himself checking in on her regularly throughout the morning and evening, it was becoming a habit. Sending his ‘good morning’ text to her after waking up? Watch her look at her phone and respond with her ‘good morning’ text right after. Checking the morning news? Check on her first. Have a notification? Open the phone and check on her first. Bored and about to open a social media app? Open the camera app and check on her first.

If he caught her while she was getting ready for bed, he’d linger and watch her crawl into her futon, hear her sigh as she lay down and begin to rest for the night. She often would play on her phone for a while before finally falling asleep. He’d have to figure out a way to tell her to stop without raising suspicion. That’s definitely not helping with her daily exhaustion.

He had to be careful, though. There were plenty of times he caught Kiryu-san in a compromising position. While he was changing, taking a bath, lounging in a way that people only do when they’re home alone or only sharing a space with their lover. Honestly, he was a bit too comfortable around Haruka-chan. He even caught the man masturbating in the bathtub right after Haruka-chan was in it. Akiyama didn’t necessarily feel disgust, but it was a little disquieting.

One night, he just couldn’t get to sleep. He and Haruka-chan had another fight earlier that day. While the make-up sex was phenomenal, they were at each other’s throats more and more these days. He didn’t like that. What if she decided to leave him because they couldn’t stay peaceful between each other? He’d never recover, could never fall in love again. 

He was idly watching her through the camera as she slept, her cute little mouth hanging open, an arm resting above her head.

Then she started to scream.

She screamed, tossed, turned, kicked her feet in the air. He had only seen her like this once before, over a year ago when he was staying at her place. And even then, Kiryu-san had blocked her from his view, and he only got to the room after she had calmed a little. The scene was awful. He couldn’t stand knowing she still suffered like this, and he could do nothing to help her. No wonder she drank so much if it prevented this from happening.

Kiryu-san threw the divider open and was by her side in seconds. He initially yelled and shook her awake, then as soon as she was lucid, he quieted right down and asked if she wanted him to stay. Even after all this time, he still asked. She nodded, her sobs audible through the camera. She curled in on herself, and Kiryu-san engulfed her in his protective embrace. How Akiyama wished that was him instead. If only he could keep her with him every second, every minute, every hour, every day. He’d never abandon her. He suddenly realized he himself was sobbing, overwhelmed by his empathy and love for her.

The cameras alleviated his anxiety, but not by as much as he thought they would. Sure, when she was at home, he was able to see her anytime from any angle. But that was only if she were at home. What about school? Or when she's out with friends?

What if she starts meeting up with her buyers again?

It wasn’t enough, how could he be so naïve? He needed to make sure he knew where she was at all times. What if she started coming in late again? Or even started skipping school again? Not like he could go looking for her, and he knew her friends had a hard time finding her in the city. No, he needed to find some way to track her. She always had her second phone, the phone he bought her and was paying for, this he knew. It was the phone she used to keep up with her buyers in the past. And it was the phone they always talked on.

Lucky for him, there were plenty of other people who wanted to track their loved ones' phones. Most of them were weirdos, people who didn’t trust their kids were going to cram school and were out with friends instead, or partners (usually guys, oddly enough) thinking their partners were cheating on them. At least his reason was legitimate. 

All he had to do was buy from one of the links someone posted for a reliable tracker. Sure, the phone itself had a tracker on it, but it wasn’t very precise, or even accurate half the time. No, he needed something that specialized in tracking. Now to just find a way to get it on her phone without her noticing.

“Haruka-chan, your second phone doesn’t have a lot of personality to it. Here’s one of those ornaments I see a lot of girls putting on their phones. It’s from one of your shows, right?” 

“Oh, uh, thanks, Shu-chan,” she said, eyeing it before putting it on her phone. She didn’t seem to suspect he put the tracker inside the charm. Perfect. 

Between every class during the school day, he’d open the app the tracker came with and check her location. Still in 2-B. Perfect. He always got a little worried when he saw her walking around, especially during lunch. It would be the perfect time for her to leave. But she never did. Such a good girl, she was.

She continued to come in on time, too. He was so proud of her, she still looked exhausted. She had mentioned that Kiryu-san was being more proactive in making sure she wasn’t relapsing, and that the medication she was on was working well enough for her. She was even seeing her therapist again! 

But what if it still wasn’t enough?

Sure, she was doing fine now. But that could change in an instant. If only he could go so deep as to read her thoughts. He didn’t see a diary when he was looking for her second phone while she was still in the hospital, and he looked pretty thoroughly. He never saw her writing in one through the cameras, either.

He would just have to deal with his fears for now.

☆☆☆

Mayflower’s blog:

Entry #81

A fnly slowed down a lil

he hasnt ben following me so much wich is gud

i apreshiate his concern bt it was gettin a lil creepy tbh

& teh more he hung around teh worst teh rumors wood get

2 of my classmates espeshialy havent given up

they somehow figured out y i was out & hav ben using it 4 more fodder aginst me

i rly want 2 try going 2 skool on time & stay teh full day again but there not making it easy

at leest seeing my freinds & A evry morning makes it a bit eazier

my nitemares arent hapening evry nite anymore

its still most nites but i do get sum proper sleep here & there

i think teh new meds r helpin

makes it a bit eazier 2 avoid teh bottel

but i still want a drink so badly

my dad threw out all my empty bottels & gave away all teh others tht still had sum in them

so at leest im not seeing them & getting tempted

i still miss teh feeling tho

& whenever i wake up from a nitemare it just makes me want it more

c u soon

Usami

After his father took him to visit his dying great uncle, Usami wasn’t able to even look at his father. His father’s distance, physical and emotional, made it easier for him to avoid him, at least. But he couldn’t stop thinking about the conversations they had that day.

“Mom, can I see my birth certificate?” he asked over dinner.

“Why would you need to see that, honey?”

“It’s for a project at school.”

“Oh, well, I don’t know where my copy went. And the city hall has the original.”

“What do you mean? That’s not the kind of document you just lose."

“Well, after separating from your father, I lost track of a lot of things. We needed that copy of your birth certificate in the paperwork for deciding custody rights, it could be sitting in a stack of papers at some lawyer’s office for all I know.”

“And you never got another copy?”

“I’m sure this project of yours doesn’t require your birth certificate. Just ask your teacher for a different assignment or something.”

“It doesn’t work that way, Mom!”

“Yuta. I don’t have it. End of conversation.” He was ready to confront her right then about his name not being Yuta, but he had to keep his cards close to his chest for now.

“Fine, I’ll ask my father, then.”

“As if he cared enough to have something like—”

“Fine! I’ll just go to city hall for one!”

“We don’t have the money—”

“I’ll ask my father for some—”

“Yuta!” She slammed her fist on the table, the plates and cutlery clanging. He stayed still, as motionless as a prey animal that noticed its predator. “Just… drop it. I’ll call your school to let them know you can’t use it if you want.”

“No. It’s fine. I’m sure I can sort something out.”

Chapter Text

“This ain’t the restaurant she walked into. Because that wasn’t her on the monitor, was it?” Majima asked. Han sighed and sat back down.

“When’d you figure that out?”

“Ya kiddin’ me? The woman was covered head-to-toe. Plenty of women have a similar figure to her. Just plop on a wig or dye her hair and just about anyone will believe it’s her if the Second-in-command says it is.”

“Fair enough. But what about her disappearing on the cameras?”

“Well, with your involvement, anythin’ coulda been done to that footage, right?” Han nodded. “But, also, that vestibule at the entrance. There wasn’t a camera in there, right? She just had to walk through the doors at the front and hide in there behind those curtains. Maybe change her clothes to look like herself again and then leave like nothin’ even happened.”

“Close. There’s actually a secret exit behind them.”

“Can I see?” Majima asked, doing his best to hide his excitement. Han nodded and led him to the vestibule. He pulled back one of the curtains and, sure enough, there was a door. The seams were tight, and it was painted the same color as the wall, but it was there. Majima reached out to open it when Han grabbed his wrist.

“Not so fast, Majima-san. Just because you’ve come this far doesn’t mean you get to know all of our secrets.”

“Fair enough.” Han’s hand lingered on his wrist for a few moments more before releasing him. “So,” Majima continued, “where is this Queen of Geomijul, then?”

“Truthfully, I don’t know.” Majima cocked a brow. “Really. She simply asked me to help fake her disappearance. She knew it would be found out eventually, but by then, she should’ve accomplished whatever she had set out to do.”

“And you just did that? No follow-up questions or nothin’?”

“Her word is absolute. I’d do anything for her, whether it be putting my life on the line or getting her her favorite brand of coffee from the other side of Yokohama.”

“If it’s black, it’s black, even if it’s white.”

“Exactly.”

“She ever tell ya when she’d be back?”

“That’s the thing. She should’ve been back by now.”

“Let me guess. If we got this far, that’s what you were gonna ask me to actually help with, right?”

“Sharp as your legendary Demonfire dagger, Majima-san.”

“Let’s figure out where this lady went.”

☆☆☆

“I’m not going in there,” Han protested.

“Whaddya mean, ‘you’re not going in there’? Don’t ya wanna find your queen?”

“I do, but…” 

Majima and Han were standing outside Seonhee’s bedroom door. Majima figured that it would be the best place to start.

“Why’d ya even show me where it is, then?”

“I mean, it’s still a good idea…”

“You think it’s fine for me, a strange man, to go through her stuff? What if I steal a pair of her panties?”

“You wouldn’t dare!”

“You’ll only know for sure if you come in with me.” Han followed as Majima opened the door and stepped inside.

The place was an assault to the senses. Zebra print was everywhere, with bright furry pink wherever zebra print wasn’t. Despite her not having been there for over a week, there was still a strong scent of cherry blossom perfume. Majima had to step back outside for a moment before his head exploded. When he walked back in, Han was standing, stone still, in the middle of the room. Majima rolled his eye and started digging through her bedside table drawer.

“Hey, wait! We don’t know if any of this is booby-trapped or not!”

“I feel like the door to get in woulda been if she was gonna set any traps,” Majima said, not even looking up at him. “Does she keep a journal or somethin’?”

“Yeah, but—”

“Where is it?”

“It’s probably with her, she takes it everywhere.”

“Maybe she has another one here. Will ya fuckin’ help me already!?” Han faltered a little before finally moving to her vanity.

“Majima-san, I found something.”

“Already? See, that’s why I needed ya in here! What is it?”

“A note,” he said, lifting a sheet of paper and showing it to him. Majima walked over and squinted at it.

“It’s all in Korean, can’t read it.”

“And not just regular Korean. It’s ciphered, too.”

“Alright, you got any code breakers here?”

“We do.”

“Well, let’s get started.”

“Not so fast.”

“Why?”

“We can’t just have any of our guys break the code. No one’s supposed to know where she is or that I helped her disappear.” Majima groaned.

“So, who can we ask?”

☆☆☆

“Joongi-kun, what a surprise!” a voice bellowed through the phone. Han had called up a potential code breaker and put him on speaker.

“Hello, Zhao-san, nice to speak with you again.”

“Pleasure’s all mine. What’s up? Asking for a 3 am liaison?”

“No, thank you. I need a code breaker, and it can’t be one of our guys.”

“Ooh, interesting. How about you stop by headquarters, and we can hash this out in person?”

“Is now fine?”

“Of course!”

“Ok. I’m bringing a companion along, just so you know.”

“A companion? Joongi-kun, don’t tell me you’ve already moved on from me!”

“See you soon,” Han said and hung up.

“Who’s that?” Majima asked.

“Zhao Tianyou, leader of the Yokohama Liumang.”

“Huh? Ain’t they your arch-nemesis or somethin’?”

“Long story, don’t worry about it.”

“If ya say so.”

☆☆☆

“Joongi-kun, you said you were bringing a companion, but I didn’t expect a smoke show like this!” Zhao said. They were sitting in another Chinese restaurant, one decidedly smaller and cheaper than Heian Tower. All the better.

“Sorry for calling so late, Zhao-san.” Zhao waved the notion off with his hand.

“I was probably gonna be awake for another couple hours anyway. So, you said you need a code breaker.”

“Yes, sir,” Han said and pulled out the note that was left in Seonhee’s bedroom. Zhao took it and studied it, reading and re-reading the note, angling it in the light in all directions.

“It’s written in Korean,” Zhao said.

“No shit—”

“Majima-san!” Han warned.

“Joongi-kun, it’s fine, your companion is more than welcome to say what he thinks. Anyway, as I was saying, it’s written in Korean, mostly. But it looks like it has ʼPhags-pa interlaced throughout—”

“The fuck is ‘fag-pa’?”

“Majima-san!”

“It’s ok, Joongi-kun. ʼPhags-pa is an alphabet that was designed by a Tibetan monk for Kublai Khan in the 13th century. It was meant to be a unifying script for all the different languages within his empire. So, varieties of Chinese and Tibetan, Mongolian, Uyghur, Sanskrit, probably Persian, and plenty of others. It was only used for about a century before the Ming dynasty came in and scrapped it. The linguistic history of those languages is fascinating. Anyway, it’s likely what the Korean script, Hangeul, was birthed from, or at least it took a lot of inspiration, probably.”

“I thought it was invented in, like, the ‘50s,” Majima interjected.

“It had a reform and became standard again after the Great East Asia War and Japanese occupation, but it’s been in and out of use since it was created in 1443.”

“Ya really know your stuff.”

“I have to.”

“So, how d’ya know which language this fag-pa is even written in? Did Koreans even use it?”

“No, they didn’t. And that’s going to be the tricky part. Or, at least, one of the tricky parts. Because what is Korean Hangeul is also ciphered. You know this, Han, but I’ll explain it to our esteemed guest. All of this is extremely generalized, by the way. No hard and fast rules. So, Korean is written in these ‘syllabic blocks’, where a syllable is written as a single block with symbols in specific placements and orientations within that block. Where a symbol is in the block dictates what sound it makes.”

“Ok.”

“Well, if you were to decide to replace all of the ㄷ’s with ㅍ’s, for example, the syllables would be read completely differently. I think there’s some letter swapping, basically.”

“Well, ya coulda just said that.”

“Forgive me, I love to talk, especially when it’s about something I find interesting.”

“So, do you think you can decipher this?” Han asked.

“Anything for you, Joongi-kun. You’ll hear from me in the next 24 hours.”

☆☆☆

“The Florist didn’t properly warn me about you, Majima-san,” Han said as he and Majima left the restaurant.

“No one would be capable of warnin’ ya enough.” Han simply nodded. 

“Do you have a place to stay?”

“Hm? Nah, I was just gonna see if that bartender at Survive would let me crash.”

“Oh, please, Majima-san. You’re now an honored guest of the Geomijul. Allow me to find you accommodations,” Han said, pulling out his phone.

“After 3 in the mornin’? Unlikely—”

“All set.”

“Huh?”

It shouldn’t have surprised Majima that the Geomijul had plenty of housing for guests within the city. None in their headquarters, that would be a security issue, but plenty of hotels and the like had rooms reserved for such occasions.

Majima was placed in one of the fanciest joints he’d ever stayed in, including during his yakuza days. It was a large penthouse suite with a jacuzzi, a California king-sized bed, a full kitchen, and a large balcony.

It was approaching 4 by the time Majima settled in, and he still had a rough time falling asleep. Why’d they have to meet up at midnight in the first place? That’s a time when movie spies meet up, not 50-year-old men with a day job. And how much longer was he gonna have to be out here, anyway? Kamurocho is only an hour’s drive away, he could just make the commute. He still had to go to said day job, Date-san could only substitute for him so well. He was supposed to do his classic combustion experiment for his class soon. And he had Haruka-chan to worry about, too.

Her attempt wasn’t as shocking to him as it seemed to be for everyone else. He saw her when she thought no one was looking, how her face would just fall, become completely devoid of feeling, almost soulless. He had been there, himself, before. Of course, he knew about her drinking, too, and the reason for it. He hoped the stab wounds from his fight with Saejima ended up being deadly.

Her scars, her staying home from school, not even leaving her futon—it did a number on Kiryu-chan, too. He stayed the strong, stoic guardian because he had to. But Majima knew Kiryu-chan, he saw it written all over his face how scared he was, how much he hated himself for not being able to help her.

And then there was Makoto. That wonderful woman. It had been nine months since they reconnected. They didn’t return to how they were immediately—they would meet once every one or two weeks for coffee to just talk. He was perfectly happy just talking to her. 

By summertime, they were meeting two or three times a week, still mostly just to talk over coffee. Then, she asked if he wanted to go get takoyaki with him. He responded that it was too hot out, but she had none of it. It was easy enough to find.

While they were waiting in line, a bright green leaf floated down and landed in her hair. Reliving that little memory sent him reeling. The memory of getting takoyaki with her, the old lady who was probably long dead saying he was a keeper, her… agreeing. Then him leaving her to get more. Her vanishing. 

He didn’t leave her side for the rest of the day that day.

Since then, they’d only gotten closer. They never did anything physical, but his emotional bond with her had grown to be one of the deepest ones he’d ever had in his life. And he wasn’t about to ruin it by asking for anything more.

☆☆☆

A phone ringing pierced into Majima’s dream, and he woke with a jolt. He answered the phone mid-yawn, rubbing the sleep from his eye.

“Yeah?”

“Majima-san, it’s Han.”

“Oh, Han, what’s up?”

“The code has been broken. Meet me in the lobby in five.”

“Five!?”

“Fine, ten.” Han then hung up. Majima sighed and got out of bed.

“You’re ten minutes late,” Han said as Majima sauntered into the lobby.

“I like to take my time in the shower. Ya said we got our code broken, yeah?”

“Yes. Follow me. Zhao-san is waiting for us.”

☆☆☆

“She’s in Kamurocho,” Zhao said bluntly.

“Huh?” Majima responded.

“He said, ‘She’s in Kamuro—’”

“Yeah, I fuckin’ heard him, Han. But why?”

“She was pretty vague in the note. She really doesn’t want anyone to know what she’s up to.”

“What’s the note actually say?” Han asked. Zhao pulled out the note and a second sheet of paper that had the translation and read it aloud.

My ashen lotus, congratulations on finding my note. I’m sure it wasn’t easy. I’m also sure it wasn’t you who decided to look in the room you found it in either. If you found this, it’s more than likely I have taken longer to get home than I expected. But I’m probably not in danger. Probably. I have left for The Greenhouse of God.

"—That’s Kamurocho—"

I’m in search of the dianthus hatchling. I got a clue from our contact there and—

“That motherfucker sent me here on a wild goose chase!” Majima interjected. “He was the one who sent me here from Kamurocho in the first place!”

“You think he tried to keep you away while she was there?” Zhao asked.

“Or maybe she never showed? Or something happened while she was there, and he thought sending you here would be a better place to start?” Han added. “Keep reading, Zhao-san.”

“Right,

I’m in search of the dianthus hatchling. I got a clue from our contact there and needed to see it for myself. If I don’t return by the solstice, I trust you to find me, my ashen lotus.

“‘Dianthus hatchling’? Pretty cryptic,” Majima said.

“Maybe to you,” Han said, brows furrowed.

“You know what that means?”

“I have a hunch. We’ve been made aware that someone high up in the Snake Flower Triad is ill. Obviously, they’re keeping it very hush-hush. This man is one of the last bastions of the old guard and one of the only reasons why they haven’t entered all-out war with The Amon Clan and Black Monday.” Majima nodded, piecing together this new information with what The Florist had told him two months prior. “If he died, any number of things could happen. And all of the organizations have contingency plans for the moment he breathes his last.”

“So, then what’s your Queen looking for?”

“The people of the Triad are very insular. Most of them never have long-term relationships, and almost none have children. Part of it is to prevent wars of succession and also to prevent any ‘weaknesses’. If one of their boys had a child, that child could be used against him.”

“I take it this sick guy does have one.”

“We believe so, and I think Seonhee has found him, or at least The Florist told her he found him and asked her to drive up so he could tell her in person.”

“Why are ya even lookin’ for him?”

“If we can protect him and get him on our side before anyone else, then that means we’ll have a better chance at kicking this Triad out of Yokohama for good.”

“So why hasn’t anyone else done that?”

“Think about it—if anyone within those groups swooped in and tried to take him under their wing, or even kill him, that is immediate grounds for war. But we’re on the outside. And, as far as we can tell, they don’t know that we know any of this, let alone that we’re trying to meddle in it all ourselves. And the Triad did a spectacular job hiding the existence of this man, too.”

“So, this guy is in Kamurocho?”

“Or near it.”

“So, what do you think happened with your Queen?”

“Any number of things. She might not have even gotten as far as finding him. She’s clever, crafty, and strong, but she’s still only one woman.”

“So, I guess we’re goin’ after her.”

“‘We’?”

“Yeah, ‘we’. I’m in this deep, he’s in this deep,” Majima said, cocking his chin at Zhao. “And if I help ya some more, maybe The Florist will owe me some more favors.” Han smiled.

“Alright. I’ll get us a taxi.”

☆☆☆

“Zhao-san, please remove your arm from me.”

“Joongi-kun, don’t be shy! Or are you scared you’ll make Majima-san jealous?” Han sighed. He and Zhao were sitting in the back seat of the cab while Majima was sitting in the front passenger seat. Most of the trip was spent by Majima sleeping, still catching up from falling asleep after 4 am the night before.

He blinked, and they were parked in front of West Park, Han paying the cabbie for his services.

“Majima-san, welcome home,” Han said.

“Fuck off,” he responded.

“Ok then.” Majima yawned and stretched before stepping out of the taxi, stretching each leg once more as he did so. 

“You know how to get in?” Majima asked. Han told him he didn't, and Majima led him and Zhao through the men’s bathroom, through the door in the back stall. “I heard a guy once tore the handle of the stall door clean off to get in while some guy was crouched down shitting. Imagine the look on the guy's face!” Majima commented, already laughing halfway through his sentence. He led them across the park, down the steps, through Purgatory, and into the opulent office of The Florist.

“Gentlemen! Welcome!” The Florist boomed, getting up from his desk and sauntering over to them. Before Majima had the chance to introduce everyone, they all said they already knew who the other were. They’d never met, but they all knew their faces. “And, of course, I already know why you’re here.”

“Well, I’d fuckin’ hope so, considering ya sent me to Ijincho to begin with.” The Florist simply laughed.

“Follow me,” The Florist beckoned, and they all approached his desk. “You know you want to,” he said to Majima.

“I ain’t got a fuckin’ hard hat on. No, thank you.”

“Spoil sport,” he said and pushed a button that was under the desk. The floor beneath them lowered, and the four men were carried down to a room covered in screens.

“Wait a fucking second—”

“Yep, that button was there the whole time. I wanted to see how long you’d bash your head against the desk, but I started to get worried you’d destroy my desk before giving up, so I just pushed the button.”

“You bastard!” Majima grabbed him by the collar. The Florist was unfazed.

Before the platform even finished descending, Han and Zhao hopped down into the room, while Majima and The Florist waited until it was solidly on the ground. The Florist walked over to the control panel and slumped back in his chair.

“So, you know Seonhee set out for Kamurocho.”

“Why’d ya send me down to Ijincho in the first place, asshole?” Majima asked.

“Because she never made it to Kamurocho.”

“Eh?”

“I don’t know what happened to her, and I can’t leave my post here. I sent you down to be my little sleuth and maybe get some answers I didn’t already have. And if you figured out her whole ‘disappearance’ that was faked, maybe you could solve the real one, too.”

“Well, I figured it out, numbnuts, so what now?”

“Han, do you know what vehicle she used to leave Ijincho?”

“It was probably just a random taxi,” Han said. “She didn’t tell me. I just helped her disappear.”

“I see.”

“Ya gonna tell us what you were gonna tell her?” Majima asked.

“No.”

“No?”

“No.” As Majima began to stomp up to him, The Florist put up a hand. “I’ll only tell Han.” Majima rolled his eyes and groaned.

“Fine. Zhao, let’s go. We can gamble while we wait.” Zhao clapped his hands excitedly and followed Majima to the platform. The Florist said nothing until well after the platform reached its apex.

☆☆☆

Han found them both with their heads in their hands at one of the bar tables in Purgatory.

“I take it you didn’t win,” he said.

“Joongi-kun!” Zhao moaned, arms outstretched. Han rolled his eyes and approached him and let him wrap his arms around him.

“So?” Majima asked. “What’d he tell ya?”

“He went so far as to tell me the name of the child we’re looking for.”

“Oh yeah?” Majima stared at him expectantly.

“My apologies, Majima, but no one else can be privy to that information.” Majima squinted his eye. Wasn’t there someone else he knew who was related to the Triad somehow? “In any case, I care more about finding Seonhee than anything else. Let’s go.” As he began to walk, Zhao didn’t release his grip and fell off the chair.

“He had a few.”

“I was only down there for, like, half an hour!”

“He threw ‘em back, I tell you what.”

☆☆☆

“Let’s start with the basics: how many taxi companies run in Ijincho and Kamurocho, what are they, and who was driving when and where the night that your Queen disappeared,” Majima said, sitting at his table in his apartment, Han and Zhao sitting with him.

“That’s as good a place to start as any,” Han responded. They were able to find eight different taxi companies and split up who would call which about the drivers that were active the night of Seonhee’s disappearance. That alone took well over an hour. And not all of them were willing to give them the contact information of the active drivers, of whom there were several for each company.

“We don’t even know for sure if she took a fuckin’ taxi! She coulda walked or took a train for all we know!”

“She’d show up on our cameras if she did. Both the Geomijul’s and The Florist’s.”

“Nah, The Florist’s reach doesn’t really go outside Kamurocho. And it’s not like you guys have a reach outside of Ijincho, either.”

“Not much, I guess.”

“How many enemies does she have?”

“Plenty.” Han took too much time describing each person who crossed her or that she crossed in turn, to the point that Majima zoned out.

“Maybe the Triad knows what she’s up to,” Zhao offered.

“You really think so?” Majima asked.

“I mean, the guy who’s sick, he knows about his kid, right? He’s not a secret to him. Wouldn’t be surprised if he figured out that you guys figured it out and were going to intervene.”

“You really think he would? I feel like at a certain point you’d want your kid to get help from someone who doesn’t want him dead sooner than later.”

“Maybe he’d prefer no one intervened at all and that all of this stays a complete secret to his kid.”

“So, you think the Triad kidnapped Seonhee?”

“Not without a fight!” Han proclaimed.

“Sure, but, as you said, she’s only one woman—” A knock on the door cut him off. All three men stayed in place, silent. There was another knock, much louder this time. All three looked at each other and slowly stood, carefully pulling out their weapons of choice. Majima, quiet as a cat, crept up to the door, rested his hand on the doorknob, and looked through the peephole.

☆☆☆

“Please forgive us, Seonhee!” Han begged, prostrating completely on the floor in front of her.

Zhao was beside him, prostrating just as deeply. “Please, please forgive us!”

Meanwhile, Majima was leaning against the wall, staring at the sideshow being performed in his fucking living room. Seonhee was standing before the two terrified men, arms crossed, intense scowl on her face. Her hair was up and under a large hat, not a single strand of purple in sight. The giant sunglasses she was wearing rested on top of her hat, and her body was covered by a large trench coat identical to the one the fake Seonhee wore when she entered Heian Tower.

“And why should I?” she asked coldly.

“We were looking for you!” Han shouted.

“We thought you were someone trying to stop us!” Zhao added. She placed a bare foot on Han’s head and pushed his face to the ground. She lowered her voice, speaking as if he were just a cockroach.

“You point that gun of yours at me one more time, and you end up in the woodchipper. Do I make myself clear?”

“Yes! Yes, Seonhee!” She pushed down on his head once more and released him.

“And you!” she said to Zhao, now stepping on his head, and he grunted. “Just because you’re not one of my men doesn’t mean you can’t meet the same fate.”

“Yes, Seonhee! I understand!”

“Hmph.” She released her foot from him and turned to face Majima. “And you—”

“Yeah, yeah, I get it, I won’t do it again.” Embarrassment flashed on her face for just a moment before returning to that strong scowl.

“Good.”

She spun on her heel and walked to the table where everyone had previously been gathered. Han and Zhao finally stood back up, not daring to look at her. Majima pushed himself away from the wall and followed. 

“So, miss Queen, where were ya?” Majima asked.

“Majima-san!” Han scolded.

“It’s ok, Han,” she said. “You’re aware of The Florist’s operation, right?” she asked Majima.

“Oh yeah, I am.”

“Well, I happen to have a solid idea of how far his reach is. I made sure not to be even a couple of kilometers from that border, just in case. Been hopping around.”

“Why? Aintcha workin’ with The Florist?”

“I’m not so sure if that’s wise anymore.”

“Why?” all three men asked at once.

“He knows too much about this whole situation, I’ll be honest. We don’t tell him everything we know, so I don’t know how he possibly figured out Black Monday’s involvement or how much the Amon clan is involved. Even his knowledge about this person we’re looking for is suspect. I just don’t know if we can trust him.”

“I never trusted the fucker except that his information is quick and accurate,” Majima cut in.

“His intentions are too unclear for my comfort,” she continued.

“So, what now, then?” Han asked.

“We try to keep The Florist in the dark as much as possible.”

“How do we accomplish that?”

“Well, for one, I can’t be going out into the city anymore. I’m quite noticeable even with my disguise. Honestly, The Florist might have caught me on the way here. That goes for you, too, Han. He knows you’re here, but your movements have to be limited. Zhao, thank you for your help, but you’ll have to return to Ijincho. And as for you, Majima-san…” She rested her elbows on the table and rested her head on laced fingers. “You’re involved, but not as much. As far as he knows, you know I’m missing and that I was supposed to meet with him to look for something or someone. I don’t think he knows anything else.” She stared at him, and he looked right back at her in the eye. “I’m staying here.”

“Huh!?” Han and Majima shouted.

“I already don’t want to risk The Florist finding me as I leave here, and since your involvement is so limited, he might not keep that close an eye on you. I highly doubt he’d suspect my being here.” Majima groaned and let his head hang backward over the back of his chair.

“You’re not the kinda woman who takes no for an answer.” She smiled. He sighed. “Fine. But I ain’t feedin’ ya or pickin’ up after ya.”

“I’m fine with that.”

Chapter Text

Wednesday, 24 December 2014

A year.

It had been one full year since his angel blessed Akiyama with the miracle of accepting his feelings and agreeing to be in a relationship with him. After everything, it felt like it had been 10 years. But with how little they were able to do together as a couple, it felt like it had only been a few weeks.

Their test results came back, and they were both clean. And he was ready to take full advantage of it. For days after the results came back, his mind was riddled with all the different ways, positions, places he could fuck her.

She had never stayed the night at his place, except for White Day, the first night she was absolutely intoxicated, and she gave him that incredible blowjob in that alley. Akiyama still cringed at the memory of Majima-san confronting him with a recording of that night. He was also curious as to why the man hadn’t done anything else since. Was it because he said he loved her? He couldn’t be too sure.

But now, if they got caught, there would be fewer consequences. She was 18, the age of consent in Tokyo prefecture. Sure, she technically wasn’t a legal adult in Japan yet, but that wasn’t as important. He didn’t necessarily want to be caught, but he didn’t mind the thrill of getting dirty outside.

He wanted to take her somewhere to celebrate, but somewhere that didn’t have alcohol. He couldn’t risk her relapsing, and it would kill him if it was his fault. That limited them by quite a lot. And then there was the fact that it was Christmas Eve, and he hadn’t prepared anything yet, not knowing where they would be at that point.

“We could just do something at your place,” she suggested while they were taking an evening stroll.

“But that’s so boring, though. I want to do something special—”

“What about my place?”

“Surely, you jest.”

“Ojisan is taking a shift Christmas Eve, it pays well and is making up for the time he took off for while I was at the hospital.” She had only been discharged a couple of weeks ago, it baffled Akiyama that she could talk about it so casually when it was one of the worst times of his life, and hers, too, probably. He stopped in his tracks.

“How long is his shift?” She took a few more steps before stopping and turning to face him.

“6 pm to 2 am.”

“You’re positive?”

“Mhmm,” she said, nodding. Her ponytail swayed as she did, and he was once again filled with an overwhelming joy in his chest. He walked up to her and wrapped his arms tightly around her.

“I love you so much.” She returned the hug and looked up at him when his arms relaxed.

“I love you, too,” she said with a confused smile. “Where did that come from?”

“I just have to say it sometimes.” She smiled again and rested her head against his chest, and he kissed the top of her head.

And so, on Christmas Eve, Akiyama waited at his apartment for the go-ahead from Haruka-chan. At least he pretended to, he just watched her and Kiryu-san through the cameras. He’d know exactly when the man left for work, and he’d drive right over.

He changed into something a little nicer than his usual black pants, black shirt, and maroon pinstripe jacket. Haruka-chan said she loved how he looked when he wore it, but tonight was special. And those clothes had gotten pretty worn over the years. He just could never be bothered to buy replacements.

Of course, he still wore his pendant that had the Sagittarius charm on it. He was never going to take that off. He also didn't dress too nicely, hoping that before the end of the night he'd be removing his clothes, or she'd be removing them for him. He opted for khaki-colored slacks, a white button-up, and a dark blue blazer with a small wisteria boutonnière pinned to the lapel.

After changing, he jogged to his car, flowers in hand, her gift stuffed in an inside pocket of his blazer. The flowers this time were a bouquet of glory-of-the-snow for resilience and optimism, snowdrops for new beginnings, hope, and the capacity to triumph over challenges, and camellias for romantic love, devotion, adoration, and care. All flowers that bloom in winter, just like their relationship.

Instead of driving to her place, he stayed put and waited, staring at the camera facing her front door through his phone. Car already running to keep it heated in the bitter December cold, he put his foot on the gas as soon as he saw Kiryu-san putting his shoes on, Haruka-chan standing behind him to say goodbye.

How nice it would be for him to be the one she'd say goodbye to every day. Or him to her. She still wanted to be a marine biologist, she wouldn't just be a stay-at-home… girlfriend? Wife? ...Mom?

He imagined the two of them sitting together on the couch, both wearing gold bands around their ring fingers, her with a garnet engagement ring on the same finger, a child sitting between them. A future he had yearned for long before meeting Hana. He was willing to ignore that dream for her, he loved her that much. But he never let go of the little hope that she would change her mind. But now, he could daydream as much as he wanted about that kind of future. And it was getting easier to imagine every day.

He was suddenly around the corner from her apartment, he had spent the entire drive thinking of such wonders. Despite her saying that Kiryu-san would be out past 2 am, he didn’t want to risk it and stayed parked around the corner. He grabbed the flowers, jogged to her apartment, bounded up the stairs, and knocked on the door.

“Shu-chan? That was quick.”

“Really?”

“Yeah, I texted you only a couple minutes ago.”

“I just couldn’t wait to see you and drove as fast as I could.” She put her hands on her hips and stared at him like a mother at her child who brought her a gift from the backyard inside a freshly cleaned living room, caring smile and all.

“That’s not very responsible of you, Shu-chan.”

“I’m not very responsible in general, based on my track record.” She laughed a little and stepped aside to let him in. “Maybe I shouldn’t leave my shoes by the front door, just in case.”

“You remember how thin these walls are? Unless you hide in the bathroom or jump out a window less than a second after he gets home, you’re getting caught.”

“ We’re getting caught, young lady.”

“I suppose so.”

“Hey,” he said after taking his shoes off and stepping into the little hall before the living room.

“Hm?”

“Happy anniversary.” Her face softened, and he pulled her in for a tight hug.

“Happy anniversary.” They lingered there in the little hall, wrapped in each other's arms, enjoying the simple pleasure of embracing the one they love. “Dinner isn’t going to be anything special, I… I had a hard time getting the energy to do anything after school.”

“Please, don’t worry about it. As long as I’m with you, I’m happy.” She smiled again and stood on her toes to kiss him.

He hadn’t considered where the flowers would go in her apartment, and Kiryu-san would definitely have questions.

“I’ll just tell him that one of my classmates sent them to try and woo me into a date or something,” she told him. And it wouldn’t be too far outside the realm of possibility, either. It was clear that plenty of boys, and even a couple of girls, had their eyes on his angel, despite the rumors.

She found a vase, and he clipped the stems and arranged them just so before she put it on her bookcase in her bedroom. Where he had found her note just a couple of weeks earlier.

Her gift, meanwhile, wasn’t jewelry this time. While Akiyama loved gifting her jewelry, she never accessorized outside of her charm bracelet and the necklace he bought her, except for the occasional earring. He hesitated to buy her tickets to some experience or trip, too, unsure if she would even have the energy to go.

He also hesitated on even giving it to her. He knew she wouldn’t have a physical gift for him, and, for some reason that he still could not fathom or comprehend, it still bothered her. Instead, he left it under her pillow, ready and waiting for her to open when she went to bed.

Dinner was onigiri, and Akiyama and Haruka-chan made them together. She put on the rice cooker and had Akiyama help her cook some salmon, tamago, and shrimp. She often had to sit while cooking, her energy already drained from finals earlier that day. Akiyama didn't care. Cooking together was wonderful regardless.

As soon as the rice cooker beeped, she scooped out the rice into a large bowl and seasoned it to perfection. She had to teach him how to assemble the onigiri, how to envelop the fillings within the rice without overfilling it, how to form the ball into the right shape and size without anything leaking, and how to wrap it in nori without it falling apart. He frequently dropped the rice ball, there were rice grains everywhere, he somehow got soy sauce on his cheek, and whenever she laughed at him, he would nudge her with his arm, causing her to fumble at whatever she was doing.

While the architecture of the onigiri was worse than any you could find at a convenience store, and the kitchen appeared as though a bowling ball had landed on the countertop and splattered all of the ingredients everywhere, the freshly made rice and homemade fillings made them leagues beyond any onigiri Akiyama had ever had before.

When they were done eating, he ran to the bathroom, knowing what was going to happen next. He tidied himself up, opened his app for the cameras, and hit record on the ones facing her futon and the couch.

Haruka-chan removed all pretense and immediately dragged him to her bedroom. That was hot. Her futon wasn't as comfortable as his bed, but he'd be happy to fuck her on splintered wood. They spent half the time on the tatami mat laden floor instead of her futon, and he had to stop himself from looking in the direction of the cameras that were now recording them fucking for his pleasure later. 

Afterward, they cuddled and decided to take a bath together.

“I can't believe you only have a shower in your apartment,” she commented while they were sitting in the tub. He was lying back against the edge, her sitting between his legs.

“It's a more western-style place. And need I remind you that you were the one to make the final decision on the apartment?” When he was apartment hunting while crashing at hers, he had narrowed down options to two, and she was the one to make the final decision after he couldn't pick.

“I wasn't thinking about the possibility of taking a bath with you then. You were still married and everything.”

“I suppose so.”

He helped her wash her back and her hair. Her hair was clearly one of the things she was neglecting so she had the energy to keep going to school on time. He didn't care. All that mattered was that she was still trying and that he could still see those beautiful brown eyes every morning. He once again wished he could do little things like this for her every day. 

“Why don't you move in with me?”

“Huh?” He stammered.

“Uh, I mean, after you graduate.” He felt her hold herself closer.

“Oh, uh, I don't—”

“Sorry, I kinda blurted it out without thinking. But, think about it, ok?”

“Wouldn’t everyone raise their brows at that? They’d probably realize we’d been doing stuff the entire time after all if I did that.”

“I guess you’re right. But would it even matter at that point?” She shrugged. “I hope we don’t have to hide so much next anniversary,” he said, forcing the conversation to move on. “I want to proclaim to the world how much I love you.”

“Yeah, me too,” she said, leaning back and resting her head on his chest.

Akiyama regretfully left close to midnight after helping Haruka-chan clean up everything. Not only did he need to make sure he was gone well before Kiryu-san got home, but she still had school tomorrow, her last two finals of the term, in fact. Akiyama felt bad for taking her when she could’ve been studying, but she assured him time and again she was ready and that they would have few opportunities to do something like this at her place again.

While driving home, he kept his phone in view, eager to watch her find her gift under her pillow through the camera. She changed into her pajamas, something he still felt weird to watch her do, and made her way to her futon. As he parked, he saw her lay down and adjust her pillow, which was when she found his gift for her. It was an envelope, a card on the inside filled with words of love for her, and also a receipt. He had donated ¥100,000,000 to Sunflower orphanage.

The weekend before, he drove out to the orphanage, curious about the life Haruka-chan lived before. When he arrived, he was shocked at the utter state it was in. He was aware that the foster care system in Japan was flawed at best and abusive at worst, but seeing it firsthand was devastating. The house itself was in a state of disrepair, shingles missing from the roof, a broken window, a giant hole in the fence.

When he stepped inside, it was somehow even worse. Half the kids were visibly malnourished, the futons were lumpy and stained, and the playground in the backyard was rusted. Looking at the place, Akiyama had to wonder what Morning Glory was like and what Sunflower was like when Haruka-chan was little and spending her childhood, the best days of her life, living there.

Surely, Haruka-chan and Kiryu-san did everything in their power to make sure those kids didn’t live like this. Haruka-chan wouldn’t stand for it.

The caretaker was the same woman who was the caretaker when Haruka-chan was there, and she even remembered her.

“She was a feisty, funny little thing,” she said with a smile. Akiyama had to stop himself from saying she was now his pretty little thing. When they entered her office, she had Enka music playing on a stereo. Akiyama recalled when he went to Sotenbori with her and one of Park-san’s friends tried to recruit her to be an idol. She had said she only really listened to Enka music because that’s what the caretaker liked.

So, Haruka-chan was telling the truth.

After sitting, Akiyama gave no pretense and offered the ¥100,000,000 “on the condition that you send me official documentation of everything you spend that money on. And you have to spend it within the next month.” As kind as the old lady seemed, Akiyama wasn’t so naïve as to be unaware of the depths of human greed. Foster care had almost become a business in Japan, with orphanages getting funding solely based on the number of children they housed. Plenty of people took advantage of that system. And he had no idea how much of that funding was going into caring for the orphans and the orphanage itself and how much was going directly into the caretaker’s pocket.

Unsurprisingly, the caretaker had a hard time believing him, and she asked question after question, prying and prodding to figure out who he was, what his end game was.

“Consider it a Christmas gift,” he told her.

She eventually accepted, and they had a contract written up and signed.

Through the camera, Akiyama could plainly hear Haruka-chan gasp as she stared at the receipt, and, after several seconds of silence, she started to sob. He smiled softly.

“Merry Christmas, Haruka-chan.”

☆☆☆

Mayflower’s blog:

Entry #85

Omg u guyzzzzzzz 2day was my 1 year aniversery wit A!

he came ovr 2 my place while dad wuz working

we made onigiri, had sum fun on my futon (╹◡◠) & took a bath 2gether after!!

he asked me abt movin in wit him after i graduate

i hav no idea how 2 feel abt tht

it sounds nice but graduation is so far away

i dont want 2 think abt tht kinda thing rite now

wat if i get my hopes up & then he gets sick of me & brakes up wit me b4 i graduate?

if i even graduate

it wood b nice 2 c him everyday tho & not just in teh mornin during homeroom

& evry nite (╹◡◠)

started seein my old therapist agen once a week

idk if its helping or not but ive been sober 4 almost a month now so theres tht

its still rly fucking hard

c u soon

Chapter Text

After their one-year anniversary, Akiyama and Haruka still took every opportunity they could to see each other. During Haruka’s winter break, Kiryu took more days off from work so he could spend more time with her. Despite eating into her time with Akiyama, Haruka was grateful for him being there. She wasn’t completely out of the woods yet, and spending time with Kiryu, the most important person in her life, always made her feel better, even if just by a little bit at times.

But whenever Kiryu was at work, Akiyama would be right at her place again. He always claimed that it was because it would be easier for her, and she would have to spend less energy to go to his place. And that was all true, but there was also the added benefit of fucking in her apartment behind her father’s back. It was so hot doing that after they’d avoided it for so long. Once he got a taste of it on their anniversary, Akiyama couldn’t get enough. And the cameras allowed him to get plenty of extra material for his spank bank as well. In the bathtub, on the couch, on her futon, bent over the kitchen counter. They even fucked on Kiryu’s side of the bedroom behind the divider once. During the act, Akiyama carefully nudged her enough that they even spent a little time going at it right on his futon.

He always made sure to leave at least an hour before Kiryu was supposed to be home and helped Haruka tidy up and make sure everything was exactly how it was before he arrived. He also never wore his cologne, not wanting his scent left all over the furniture.

Kiryu worked again on New Year’s Eve—the pay was just as good as Christmas Eve, and it meant that he could make money during the one shift equal to at least two normal shifts, if not more. Christmas Eve was only a week prior, and Haruka still didn’t have much energy to go out and celebrate, but Akiyama didn’t care about how they spent the evening together. He still got to see her. She was still in his life. That was all that mattered to him.

It was another simple evening at her place—an easy dinner they made together and some casual fucking after. When they weren’t doing that, they watched the annual New Year’s Eve special of Downtown no Gaki no Tsukai ya Arahende!!, a comedy variety show that, every New Year’s Eve, aired a 6 hour special that involved the five members of the comedy group being forced into various situations for a full 24 hours, and any time they laughed, they would get smacked on the ass with a baton. This year’s theme was ‘prison’, and it was as hilarious as every other year.

Usami asked his father for an official copy of his birth certificate, and, to his surprise, he agreed to it. His father gave him an envelope with “all the necessary paperwork”, the cash to pay for it, and a phone number the clerk should call “if they give you a hard time”. Considering Usami’s name was different on his birth certificate from any of his other documentation, he was grateful for his father’s assistance. Japanese bureaucracy was no joke, and he ended up needing to resort to giving the man behind the desk the phone number to call. And, to his father’s credit, it worked. He still had to fill out and sign form after form after form, sometimes even waiting multiple days before he could start the next one. But he got it.

He kept an eye on the mail. If his mom checked the mailbox and saw a letter from the local government addressed to him, he could kiss ever seeing his birth certificate goodbye. When he finally got the letter, he struggled to even open the envelope. If he never actually saw the certificate, he could eventually convince himself that his father was lying, that his name was Usami Yuta and not Lang Hao Qiang. But his father, for once, didn’t seem like he was lying, and his mom’s denial of seeing it or having one was proof enough. But still.

He opened the envelope, turned it over, and took the certificate out, only able to see the blank back of it. Carefully, he turned the page over, eyes darting over the ink printed on it. At least his mom’s name, Hirose Miyako, was her real name. And his father’s name was in fact Lang Lao Da, as he had introduced himself when visiting his great-uncle. He stared at the three names for a long time, convinced that it was a trick of the light, that he was misreading it, that he would blink, and Usami Yuta would be written instead of Lang Hao Qiang. But the names didn’t change, no matter how long he looked at them.

He stuffed the certificate back in its envelope and hid it under his bed with his magazines that he didn’t want his mom to find. He grabbed one while he was down there and flipped to a page where he had taped a photo of Sawamura-chan’s face over the face of the girl who was posing.

Monday, 05 January 2015

The day before school started again, Akiyama called Haruka-chan and asked her to spend the night at his place.

“You can just say you’re with your friend, right?”

“Well, I guess, but…”

“I know it’s something we’ve not done before, and it’s kind of a big step. If you don’t want to yet, that’s fine—”

“No, it’s fine. I, uh, I’m just kinda nervous, I guess.”

“That’s ok. I just want to fall asleep with you by my side, cradled in my arms.”

I don’t want to wake up on my own anymore.

“Ok. Want me to come over now?”

He picked her up around the corner, and she dropped her bag of stuff at her feet after climbing in. She didn't need to bring much besides her school bag and uniform, she already had shampoo and a toothbrush at his place.

“Don’t pack any pajamas, either. I bought some for you,” he had told her. After parking, he carried her bag for her as they walked up to his apartment, his breath getting shakier with every step. This was so different from any other time she had visited. She was going to be there all night. All night.

After entering, he took her bag to his bedroom and placed it beside his bed. On what would be her side that night. Her side. She’d be sleeping there. Right beside him. His hands shook as he put the bag down, and he had to take several deep breaths before shakily grabbing the door handle and stepping back out to the living room.

 To distract himself and calm his nerves, he started preparing dinner.

“Need me to help?” she asked.

“Only if you want to. I can tell you’ve not got a lot of… what was it? Spoons?”

“Yeah, spoons.”

“I can tell you don’t have a lot of spoons today. You can relax on the couch and watch TV if you’d prefer.” She looked to the ground and quietly thanked him. He stopped what he was doing, walked over to her, and kissed her forehead. She looked up at him, expression unreadable. “Hey, I don’t think less of you because you can’t help all the time, ok? You’ve done so much, it’s ok to say, ‘I can’t,’ ok?” She hesitated before agreeing. “Are you just saying that to make me feel better?” She nodded again. He pulled her in close. “I love you.”

“I love you, too,” she finally said, resting her head by his heart. He kissed the top of her head before releasing her and returning to the kitchen to continue making dinner.

After eating, Haruka-chan grabbed his wrist and dragged him to his bedroom, impatiently throwing her lips on his before even opening the door. He picked her up and carried her the rest of the way to the bed.

He still was careful about being on top of her. She was fine every time he had been on top whenever they fucked. So far. He could not risk it. It would kill him if he did something to her that made her suffer so much again.

Resting her on the bed, he kissed her while he was still standing, and she grabbed at his collar to keep him there.

“Let me go get something,” he breathed out, and she regretfully let him go. He walked to his dresser, opened the top drawer, and pulled out a large box. “I don’t have the virile stamina that I used to have, and I want to make sure you don’t stop having a good time if I need a break,” he said, walking back over to her. He placed the box on his bedside table and opened it, revealing an array of toys he had picked out for her. She stared at them, blushing. “Is it ok I got these for you?”

“Uh, y-yeah, it’s ok,” she said, continuing to stare at them. He had picked up a dildo, a vibrator, a different kind of vibrator, a massage gun, and a butt plug.

“You embarrassed?” She looked away.

“A little.”

“It’s ok, I get it. I just wanted you to know I had these in case you wanted or needed them. You can use them by yourself, too, you know,” he added, wiggling his brows. She laughed half-heartedly. He put the lid back on the box and moved it under the bedside table—still within reach, but no longer within sight.

He sat back down on the bed next to her, leaned down, and kissed her. Softly at first, her excitement having buried itself more than he expected from showing her the toys. But it didn’t take long for it to resurface, and she opened her mouth for him. He grabbed onto her, pulling her close, and gently lowered himself onto her, asking her if it was ok as he did so. She nodded, and he rested fully over her, his knees on either side of her.

Soon, clothes were strewn all over the floor, the blanket was tangled up beneath and around them, and sweat pooled at Akiyama’s brow, his cock carefully thrusting into her. He was getting close, fast, the anticipation of her spending the night beside him arousing him more than he thought it would. As he was thrusting into her, his arms fully wrapped around her as she lay back on his bed beneath him, her hair beautifully spread out on his pillow, he whispered into her ear, “Can I… bring out… one of the toys?” He felt her tense up beneath him. “I want to… make sure you… cum first, that’s all. I’m… getting… really close.”

“Ok.” He lifted himself up and looked at her. She still had trepidation in her eyes, but he reached down and pulled out the box anyway.

“Which one do you want to try?” She shrugged her shoulders. “Don’t push yourself, we don’t have to—”

“No, no, it’s ok—”

“You don’t seem ok with it.” She took a heavy breath.

“I’m just nervous. But I trust you.” He smiled softly. “There’ve been… plenty of other times I was nervous about something you wanted to do. But I always end up liking it. And… you’ve stopped yourself without me needing to tell you to when I wasn’t comfortable.”

“Do you trust me still now when I say I think you’ll like it? And that I’ll stop if you don’t?” She nodded. “Ok. Let’s start you off easy then.” He reached down, grabbed the massage gun, and sat himself up, removing himself from her while holding her legs open for him. He set the massager to the lowest intensity, its low buzzing rolling through the tension that was slowly dissipating. “I’m going to rest this on you, ok?” She nodded, and he gently lowered it onto her, a little above her clit. “That feel ok?” She nodded again, brows slightly furrowed.

He carefully lowered it, resting it more and more onto her clit, glancing up at her face as he did. Her eyes widened ever so slightly, and her thighs moved to close.

“How does that feel?” She nodded once more, her hands turning to fists, clenching the bed sheet beneath her. He slowly moved the massager in circles on her clit. He looked back up at her, and her head was tilting back. “You like that?” She nodded again.

He had come down some by this point, and inserted himself back into her, letting his cock rest in her as he brought her closer to orgasm.

“I’m going to increase the speed,” he said and pushed the button on the side. The pitch of the buzzing heightened, and her legs moved closer together. “Want to take control?” Not looking, she moved a hand toward him, and he guided her hand grab to the massage gun while keeping it on her. Her slender fingers wrapped around it in a way not dissimilar to how she would grab on his cock and held it in place. “You can move it if you want,” he offered, and she gingerly shifted her hand, circling the massager on herself.

Now that she was in control, he leaned forward and rested his hands up by her head, keeping himself elevated so she could continue to move her hand freely, and began slowly thrusting into her again. She kept her eyes shut, but she couldn’t hide the building pleasure on her face.

It didn’t take long for moans to escape her throat, for her legs to wrap around his waist, for her to set the massager to the highest setting. Certainly much quicker than whenever he went down on her, which was the entire point. Suddenly, her face scrunched, she squeezed her legs shut as much as she could while he was still inside her, and her gorgeous moans of orgasm escaped her lips. She eventually turned the massage gun off, her breath heavy, shock on her face.

“Did you like that?” he asked with a grin. She nodded, still searching for her voice. He grabbed her chin and moved her head to make her look at him. “Now you see why I bought those toys?”

“Y-yeah.” He kissed her.

“Perfect. We can try the rest some other day. I’m ready to get back to fucking you now.” She was halfway through agreeing when he began to rapidly slam his cock deep into her, no longer needing to hold back. He grabbed at her, the bed sheets, the pillow, the headboard, anywhere that let him slam into her harder, faster, deeper. “Oh, fuck,” he breathed out, and came long and hard inside her, just like he did every time they fucked. He had to take full advantage of her birth control, after all.

“What time do you usually get ready for bed?” he asked her after they cleaned up. She shrugged.

“Around 9:30, I guess. Why?” He looked at the clock on his bedside table.

“Ready for round two?”

☆☆☆

They cuddled on the bed, Akiyama slowly fading into sleep. Haruka-chan suddenly woke him up, and he started.

“I wanna take a shower. Got pretty sweaty from this evening’s activities.”

“I’ll join you,” he said with a smirk, rubbing the sleep from his eyes. She smiled sheepishly.

“Ok.” She pulled herself up and out of bed, and Akiyama followed her to the bathroom. Both still naked, they stood in silence after he turned on the shower, waiting for the water to get hot before stepping in.

“Ladies first,” he said after checking the water with his hand. She stepped in, set the water temperature higher, then stepped aside to give him room.

“It’s a bit of a tight fit,” she said.

“That doesn’t bother me,” he said, looking deep into her beautiful brown eyes. Realizing his stature was blocking almost all of the water from touching her, he spun them around so she was under the stream and let her warm herself up in the hot water. Her blissful face was more than worth the sudden cold.

They didn’t get as handsy as they might have if they hadn’t just intensely fucked twice in less than an hour, and he was fine with that. He helped her wash her back and her hair, she helped wash his back in turn, and even stroked him for a bit, his cock not getting the memo that he was running low. She wasn’t able to make him cum, but boy did it still feel amazing.

While she was drying her hair, Akiyama went to his chest of drawers and pulled out the pajamas he had bought her. He felt a little silly when he was buying them, standing in the women’s section and picturing each and every one on her. He considered just buying her lingerie, but he wanted her to actually be comfortable while she slept.

And he hoped she’d sleep over more than once. Having a set just for her at his place increased the odds.

He landed on a red set with black lining, 100% cotton. He got a matching pair of slippers for her, too. He laid them out on the bed for her and continued to get ready for bed himself.

“Do you like them?” he asked her after she tried them on, watching her from his bed. She moved and stretched and bent in all sorts of ways.

“Yeah, they're really comfortable,” she said, a little surprised.

“Perfect. Now come over here.” She walked over to the bed and got under the blanket with him. Before turning his bedside lamp off and drowning them in darkness, he took the opportunity to just stare at her. She was lying down facing him. And she was so beautiful. He rested his hand on her cheek and gently rubbed her with his thumb.

“What?” she asked, smiling softly.

“I never thought I’d get to do this. I’m so lucky. I love you so much.” He scooted closer and wrapped his arm around her, and she buried her face in his chest.

“I love you, too.”

He had dreamed of this moment ever since she first said, “Good night, I love you,” while in her drunken haze on White Day. But this time, he knew she meant it for him.

Chapter Text

Tuesday, 06 January 2015

Akiyama and Haruka had the damndest time trying to fall asleep, both full of adrenaline from sharing a bed all night. But she didn’t wake up screaming. Instead, she woke up to him holding her closely, firmly keeping her with him. It was so comforting, not unlike waking up next to Kiryu after her nightmares. She shifted a bit, and he breathed in deeply.

“Good morning,” he said gruffly.

“Good morning.” She turned over to face him, his face just barely visible from the rising sun peeking through the blinds. She yawned and rubbed her eyes, and he smiled warmly.

“You know how many times I pictured this exact moment? Waking up next to you, watching you rub your eyes. I must be dreaming.” She placed her hand on his cheek and kissed him.

“That didn’t wake you up.”

“I guess not. Let me try again.” He kissed her, and it wasn’t long before the kiss deepened, and he was unbuttoning her pajama top, releasing her bare breasts. She giggled as he sucked on her nipples, and he lowered her pajama pants. He made a good choice, these were so easy to remove. He quickly lowered his boxers and began thrusting himself against her clit. She moaned in anticipation, and he inserted himself.

“Oh my god,” she said under her breath. He wrapped his arms around her and began slowly but deeply thrusting into her, her pajama top becoming a crumpled mess under them. After a few thrusts, he paused and just allowed himself to feel, to be present there. Just lying there on top of her, him casually inside her, it was bliss.

She got impatient, though, and began moving her hips, and he quickly followed suit. He pushed the blanket off of them and propped himself up to fuck her properly. She tilted her head back, a face of pure pleasure. He flipped her over, lying flat on her stomach, and he laid himself over her, continuing to thrust in her from behind. He grabbed at her hair as he did so, and she turned her head so he didn’t smother her in her pillow. As he lost himself in his pleasure, he pushed her head down on the mattress and pulled her hips up slightly with his other hand, getting the angle just right. 

“Shu-chan!” she gasped, and he came instantly.

“Oh fuck, oh, oh my god,” he said, not expecting the orgasm that washed through him. He almost fully collapsed on top of her, sweat dripping onto her neck. “Sorry,” he breathed out. “I didn’t plan on that.”

“That’s ok,” she responded. “It’s too early in the morning for me to cum, anyway.”

“Are you sure? Because I can—” He started to reach for the toys under his bedside table.

“Yes, I’m sure.” She looked up at him as best she could, body still pressed on the bed under him.

“Ok,” he said, moving to grab some tissues. “You know,” he continued, “there’s something I’ve been wanting to try.”

“Hm? What is it?” He bent over her again to speak in her ear.

“I want you to keep my cum in you all day,” he said gruffly. “Carry around a piece of me with you, talk to your friends and other teachers while filled with my cum.” Haruka moaned in response. “Even when you go home to your dad, I want you to keep my seed inside you. How does that sound?” She nodded, and he moved back up and removed his cock from her, using the tissue to keep his cum from spilling out of her. He pushed it in and let it soak up his seed, making sure it was firmly in place. He flipped her over and admired her body now that he properly had the opportunity. “Wow,” was all he said. He checked the time for the first time since waking up. “Better get a move on,” he said and leaned down to kiss her one more time before getting up. She shifted and stood, making sure his cum wasn’t going to leak onto her legs. All good. He pulled her in for a tight embrace. “I wish I could do this every morning,” he whispered.

“What, fuck me?” He laughed.

“So vulgar, young lady," he said, rubbing her lower lip with his thumb. "I meant being able to hug you, to wake up next to you.” She rested her head against his chest.

“Me too,” she finally said.

Why don’t you move in with me?

“I love you.”

“I love you, too.”

☆☆☆

The two were finally able to keep their hands off of each other long enough to leave for school. As they walked to his car, Akiyama stared at her, remembering that she still had his cum inside her, all while even wearing her school uniform. He started getting rock-hard again.

He put her bag of stuff that wasn’t for school in the trunk of his car. He stood there, staring at them. The pajamas were strewn somewhere on his bedroom floor. They’d have her scent all over them. Perfect to use for later. But her other things, she’d take with her, back to her apartment with her dad. He tried to come up with some master plan of using these items of hers as hostage to make her come back to his place, to stay there so he could keep her all to himself, keep her in his sights at all times.

The cameras in her apartment were doing their job, sure. But what if one of them broke? What if the power went out? They weren’t permanent solutions.

“Shu-chan, come on!” suddenly brought him back to the present, and he shut the trunk and walked to the driver’s seat. He gave her one final kiss, started the car, and rested his hand on her thigh as he drove to school.

☆☆☆

Akiyama found a good spot to drop Haruka-chan off some distance from the school and continued to drive while she walked the rest of the way. It would set off alarm bells in everyone’s heads if they were spotted driving to school together in his car. Once she was out of sight, he slammed his foot on the gas pedal and sped to the school. His anxiety only continued to rise, and he drove faster and faster, not able to even breathe until he parked, taking up two parking spaces in his haste, yanked his phone from his pocket, jabbed his finger on his phone to unlock it, and got the app open.

There she was. Moving at about walking pace towards the school. He took in a deep breath. She was alive right now. That’s good.

Unless someone took her phone, and she was collapsed somewhere on the side of the road. That’s a possibility, right? Oh god, he had to go find her! He jumped out of his car and ran to the entrance of the school. She was supposed to be a few streets away. He squinted in the distance, checking her location constantly. When her little avatar turned the corner on the map, he saw her turn the corner onto the road in plain view. Thank god. He ran back before she could see him and started preparing for the day.

When she entered his classroom, he had to suppress another sigh of relief. And force himself to not stare—no way had he forgotten what they did last night, that morning, or the fact that she was walking into the classroom, sitting at her desk, glancing at him and talking to her friends, carrying his cum inside her. No one had any idea how sinful his angel really was.

“Wow, look who’s in today! I hoped she might off herself for good over winter break!” he overheard a student say. He turned and saw Amon-san and Hori-san standing next to each other near the classroom entrance. Amon-san had the most conniving grin on her face, but Hori-san looked less than invested.

“Noa-chan…” Hori-san said. Amon-san eyed her with annoyance.

“What?”

“Maybe we should stop. Almost everyone else has moved on. And if it’s true that she went to the hospital because—”

“I didn’t think you were such a cowardly little bitch—”

“Fuck off,” Hori-san said. “What’s your deal with her, anyway?” Amon-san didn’t answer, and Hori-san walked away, leaving Amon-san to stew in place. 

Akiyama decided to act like he hadn’t overheard them, but he still had to turn away and smile. At least a little progress was being made.

Majima

“I’ve had enough of this woman!” Majima arrived home to yet another mess. How Seonhee managed to be so messy when she otherwise had everything together was beyond him. And it was the first day back to school from winter break, he was already fed up enough. The first day was always the worst—none of the students wanted to be there, most of the staff didn’t want to be there, and the dreary, chilly weather mixed with his destroyed sleep schedule made him exhausted. He pulled out his phone and called up Han.

“Majim—”

“Can’t she stay anywhere else!?”

“I’m sorry, Majima-san, but even fewer people know about your involvement. She’s safest there.”

“Ain’t you guys got some impenetrable fortress or some shit!?”

“Not in Kamurocho.” Majima groaned loudly.

“How about I pass her off to a friend, huh!?”

“We can’t trust anyone—”

“We sure as shit can trust this guy! And he’s got the patience that I don’t!”

“Majima-san, please—” Majima hung up and rang up another person, the one man he could trust more than anyone else.

☆☆☆

“Majima-no-nii-san, what have you done this time?”

“Kiryu-chan! That’s no way to answer the phone!” Kiryu groaned and placed his head in his hand.

“You never call unless you need me to clean up your mess.”

“Well, this time, it’s so I don’t have any more messes in my fuckin’ apartment.”

“Huh? I’m not falling for that. You just want to see me in that maid outfit again—”

“That’s not what I mean!” He paused. “I still have the maid outfit in my closet if you ever wanted—”

“No, thank you, once was enough. So, what is it, then?”

☆☆☆

There was a knock on Kiryu’s door. Haruka was still at school, attending her singing club. Kiryu was so proud of her for showing up there again, and she always was in a good mood when she came home after. And it was good that she wasn’t home, it would give him time to figure out how to tell her. He looked through the peephole and saw Majima-no-nii-san with a woman who was clearly trying to keep herself hidden. He sighed and opened the door.

“Majima-no-nii—”

“Kiryu-chan!” he shouted and jumped to wrap himself around him. Kiryu stepped aside, and he instead faceplanted on the apartment floor.

“Kiryu… Kazuma…” the woman said.

“Yes, that’s me. Come inside, it’s freezing.” She thanked him and walked in, stepping on Majima-no-nii-san in the process, and Kiryu shut the door behind her. “So, you’re in hiding or something—?”

“Shhhhh!” Majima-no-nii-san said from the floor, putting a finger up to his lips to emphasize his point. “We don't know where is safe just yet. I trust ya, Kiryu-chan, but we gotta scope the place out first, just in case,” he whispered. Kiryu raised an eyebrow.

“Be my guest. Doubt you'll find anything.” Majima-no-nii-san lifted himself and began to crawl, exaggeratedly looking under every piece of furniture.

“Safe so far…” He stood and began lifting pillows, opening cabinets, almost disassembling anything and everything he could touch. Kiryu just leaned against the wall and watched patiently. Meanwhile, the woman who still hadn't revealed herself, stayed standing in the little hallway by the front door. Suddenly, he stopped in place. “Kiryu-chan.”

“Yeah?”

“Have you been up to anything lately? Made any new enemies?”

“No? Why?” Majima-no-nii-san stepped aside and, with a flourish, extended his hand to bring Kiryu’s attention to a specific spot. There was, in fact, a secret camera hiding in a crack in one of the cabinets. This apartment was cheap for a reason. Kiryu's face fell, and he ran to the camera. He inspected it from all angles before picking it up and studying it even more. “What…”

Majima-no-nii-san continued to hunt as Kiryu inspected the camera, and he found more. Many more. In other cabinets, behind decorations, implanted into picture frames. There must've been well over a dozen.

“There probably isn't a single spot in this entire apartment that wasn't filmed from at least two cameras. What the fuck is all this, Kiryu-chan?”

“I… I wish I knew…” he said, staring into the middle distance.

“How long have these all been here?”

“I… I don't…”

“When's the last time you inspected the place? Or done a full deep clean?”

“Not since moving in, I don't think.”

“Shit.” Majima-no-nii-san gathered all of the tiny cameras he had found together and dropped them on the little table in the living room. “This is some high-tech advanced bullshit. Whoever planted these meant business. They must've hired a professional. There's probably more I haven't found yet.”

“Is there a way of finding the rest? Or of figuring out who planted these?”

“Finding the rest won't be hard. Just gotta get one of those electromagnetic sensor things and wave it around. Figuring out who? That might be more difficult. We gotta figure out where the recordings are going, too. Guess I gotta cash in that favor I just got from The Florist—”

“Majima-san,” the woman finally said. “I've got plenty of experience with surveillance.”

“Oh, yeah, ya do. Think you can help?”

“I'd be happy to. Anything for… the Dragon of Dojima.” Majima-no-nii-san rolled his eye.

“She's been fangirling about ya since I told her I was bringing her here.”

“And… who is she?”

“I'll tell ya once we know for sure this place ain't bugged anymore.” The woman walked up to the two and sat down at the little table with them. The table was small enough for knees to touch, but no one shifted from anyone else. She picked up the cameras and quickly found something.

“Whoever planted these was still an amateur. Or at least whoever bought the cameras and paid someone else to plant them. They left the serial numbers on all of the cameras. We can easily use that to track the buyer.”

“Damn, that is amateur. Any guy who's been dealing in the underworld for at least a little bit would know not to do that.”

“Well, the serial number is hard to see. It’s just lightly embossed on the inside, so maybe they thought there weren't any to start with.”

“Still amateurish for not inspecting for any to begin with.” The woman began typing all of the serial numbers one by one into her phone.

“I’m sending these numbers to my ashen lotus. He’s on his way with a sensor now. We’ll figure this out soon enough.”

☆☆☆

It took Han barely an hour to arrive at Kiryu-chan’s place. He walked right past Kiryu-chan as he opened the front door with scarcely a vague acknowledgement that he was there before going straight to Seonhee. He was fully in disguise, too.

“Here’s the sensor,” he said, passing it to Seonhee. As she began to fiddle with it, Han settled at the little table.

“So, learn anythin’?” Majima asked

“Alright, so, the company that these cameras came from is pretty high-end, one usually used by large corporations or even government agencies. This person really didn’t want these cameras to be caught.”

“He did a pretty bang-up job, all things considered.”

“Indeed. This also tells me the person has access to a lot of money. Like, a lot lot, especially considering how many they purchased, and then also hired someone to set up the cameras.”

“You think they got the money from a lender?” Kiryu-chan asked.

“Possible. I understand there’s plenty in Kamurocho.”

“Not as many as before the dissolution of the Tojo Clan, but yeah, there’s quite a few still. I’m good friends with one of them. We might want to reach out, he could lead us somewhere.”

“Perhaps. The business this person got these cameras from is high profile to people in the know, and they’re known for their customer secrecy and advanced data encryption. It’s not easy to know anything about their clients.”

“But?” Majima queried. Han smirked.

“But that doesn’t mean it’s impossible. I’ve got guys working on it as we speak.”

“I thought ya said your guys were all technologically inept.”

“We have resources. Suffice it to say, I expect we’ll have answers within the next few days.” During the conversation, Seonhee continued to check the apartment for any more cameras. She had located four more so far.

“Have them check these, too,” she told Han, passing the ones in her hand to him.

“I still can’t figure out who could’ve done this or why. I’ve not touched anything related to the underworld in years,” Kiryu-chan said. “Aside from the Ryudo family in Okinawa, but that’s in Okinawa. And all their stuff got resolved, last I heard.”

“People still remember ya, Kiryu-chan. Maybe some ex-yakuza are trynna stir some shit up again.”

“Maybe.”

Seonhee found an additional two cameras after fully sweeping the apartment thrice over. Confident that everything was taken down, she finally removed her disguise, as did Han.

“Now I can formally introduce myself. I am Seonhee, leader of the Geomijul in Ijincho, and this is my second-in-command, Han Joongi.”

“Are you two… Korean, then?” Kiryu-chan asked.

“Yes.”

“A bunch of their guys are ex-Jingweon Mafia, yeah. But don’t worry, they ain’t out for blood from us,” Majima said.

“You’re familiar with the history, then?” Han asked Kiryu-chan.

“Yeah, you could say that,” Kiryu-chan said, eyes starting to unfocus. Majima was aware of what happened that night. Christmas, 1980. The massacre. Kiryu-chan’s unintended involvement. He stared at him for a moment longer, at the pain building in his eyes.

“Anyway, Seonhee here is a big fan of yours,” Majima continued. Even under her foundation, it was clear as day that Seonhee was blushing, and hard.

“Oh, really? I don’t have many of those.”

“Well, you’re a legend! How could I not be a fan?” she said, struggling to keep her face neutral. Suddenly, Han’s phone rang. He answered, spoke about how to make cranberry pie and some old-school boxing anime, before hanging up again.

“They need me back at headquarters.”

“Huh?” Kiryu-chan asked.

“These guys and their fucking codes,” Majima said to himself.

“It’s not safe to discuss anything over the phone. As soon as I have our info, I’ll let you know and drive back up here.” Han stood and walked to the front door.

“Thanks, Han,” Majima said with a wave.

“Anything for Seonhee.” After Han left, Kiryu looked back over at the blushing Queen.

“So, you’re staying here, then?”

“She’s not staying at my place anymore, that’s for fucking sure,” Majima said.

“Why are you out here?” Seonhee gave him a summary about the delicate truce between the Snake Flower Triad, the Amon clan, and Black Monday before telling him about the higher-up in the triad who was sick, the child of that man for whom she was now hunting, and why.

“He’s here in Kamurocho. I’m sure of it. But as far as my people are concerned, and The Florist, too, I hope, I’ve gone missing. And, as far as I can tell, none of the groups know that I know any of this or am even trying to get involved. I was staying with Majima to try to stay hidden. The more degrees of separation, the better.”

“Except this woman leaves a fucking mess! It’s like a tornado goes through my apartment every 30 goddamn minutes! I didn’t even know someone was capable of makin’ such a mess! That’s how you get roaches, you know!”

“Don’t you dare talk to me about roaches! I’d burn that apartment to the ground if I found any!”

“Then don’t leave a fucking mess—!”

“Alright, that’s enough, you two,” Kiryu-chan said. “You talked about the Amon clan. I’ve dealt with—”

“Yes, you did quite a number on their reputation. They’re trying to claw themselves back to the top, but it isn’t easy. If they could get the triad under them, using this person I’m looking for as leverage, they’d get back there real quick. I know you’ve had encounters with the Snake Flower Triad, too.”

“Except the triad is also struggling, but the clan doesn’t know that,” Majima added.

“Exactly. And Black Monday knows how dire both organizations are doing and is hoping they’ll wipe each other out for good and pick up the scraps, all while providing just enough resources for both to make them think they aren’t a threat. Also, with the hope that they’ll use the money and weapons to take each other out that much quicker. They’re not strong enough to do that on their own.” Kiryu-chan sighed.

“Now I know more than I ever cared to,” he said.

“Well, she’s stayin’ here now. You’re the only guy I can trust to keep her here.”

“At least you thought that. Apparently, I'm not as safe as I thought.”

“It’s ok, we’ll sort this out. I think we nipped something major in the bud. If the person was only spyin’ on ya, they weren’t brave enough to do anything else. They probably aren’t going to try anything else any time soon.”

“I hope you’re right.”

☆☆☆

Mayflower’s blog:

Entry #88

u gaizzzzzz guess wat!?

last nite i spent teh nite wit A 4 teh 1st time!!

lyk, actualy fell asleep in his arms & woke up nxt 2 him in teh morning & evrything!!!!

we took full advantage of tht bed thts 4 shure \(♡´౪<♡)/

he evn bot me a set of pajamas 2 keep there!

tht wit my own shampoo & othr stuff its like I kinda live there!!

maybe moving in aftr graduating wouldnt b a bad idea

maybe ill stick around 4 a while to see what thts lyk

my therapist sed tht any lil reeson 2 keep living is a good reason

i think this mite b a good reeson

c u soon

Chapter Text

When Haruka returned home from her singing club at school, there was a stranger lounging on the couch. She dashed back out the door and whipped her phone out.

“Ojisan! There’s someone in the apartment!”

“Yeah, I know.”

“You know!? Why didn’t you tell me!?”

“Sorry, Haruka, I was trying to figure out how to tell you.”

“The first thing could be ‘When you get home, someone else will be there’!”

“Sorry. Her name is Seonhee, and she’s in hiding right now. Majima-no-nii-san passed her on to us.” 

After hanging up, she took a deep breath, walked back inside, and carefully approached the stranger named Seonhee.

“Uh, hi, my name is Haruka,” she said, and the woman looked over at her. Haruka was instantly struck by how pretty she was, and she had such a cool outfit on, too.

“Hi, I’m Seonhee. Nice to meet you!” she said, sitting up and taking her hand. “You’re Kiryu-san’s kid, right?”

“Basically.”

“Don’t worry, I know all about your history. I’ve been a big fan of your dad’s for years.”

“A fan!?”

“Why does that surprise everyone?” Haruka’s phone started ringing. Her second phone.

“Sorry, I gotta take this,” she said, stepping outside once more. “Hi, Shu-chan—”

“Haruka-chan, thank god you’re ok!”

“Uh, yeah, why wouldn’t I be?” He stammered.

“Uh, um, well, I, uh, heard there was a mugging near your place, and I just wanted to check on you! Yeah, that’s it!”

“Uh-huh.”

“Is Kiryu-san home?”

“No, I think he took another extra shift today.”

“I’m coming over—”

“No! You can’t!”

“What? Why?” His hurt could be felt through the receiver.

“I don’t know when he’s coming back, I don’t want you to have to escape through the bathroom window or something.”

“But I still have some of your stuff in the trunk of my car. Don’t you want me to come drop them off?”

“Hold onto them, I’ll get them next time I come over.”

“Do you not want to see me?”

“Oh my god, Akiyama-san, that’s not true, and you know it!” He sighed.

“You’re right. I’m sorry. I guess after having you all to myself last night, I’m going through some sort of emotional withdrawal.” It was Haruka’s turn to sigh. 

“I love you.” He chuckled softly.

“I love you, too. Please respond whenever I text you tonight, ok? I’ll keep thinking about that break-in, otherwise.”

“I thought you said it was a mugging?”

“Did I? Sorry, I meant break-in.”

“Ok, I’ll make sure to keep an eye on my phone. I’ll talk to you soon, I guess.”

“Yeah, ok.” He paused. “I miss you so much. I wish I could be with you every second.”

“I do, too.”

“Ok, I won’t keep you any longer. Bye, I love you.”

“Bye. I love you, too.” She hung up, sighed, and walked back inside once more.

☆☆☆

For the next hour or so, Haruka was bombarded by questions from their new guest all about Ojisan.

“What are his favorite foods?” “What deodorant does he wear?” “Have you ever seen him cry?”

Haruka did her best to answer honestly but also in a dignified manner, without giving away too much, either. Just because Ojisan and Majima-san seemed to trust her to some degree didn’t mean she automatically trusted her, too. Ojisan was much too trusting of people in general, for one. And who knows what Majima-san told him to make him agree to this whole arrangement?

All the while, she changed out of her uniform, tried to do some homework, prepared most of their dinner so it could be cooked as soon as Ojisan came home, and kept thinking about Shu-chan. About spending the night with him, waking up next to him. It really was nice. She wouldn’t mind doing it again. She remembered what they did after waking up, too. When Seonhee hit the brakes on the questions, she laid on her futon and pulled out her second phone.

Me: im still carrying ur cum inside me sensei (✿◦’ᴗ˘◦)♡

That wasn’t actually true, she had taken care of it part way through the school day, but she still got a thrill from the idea of it and knew that he would, too.

💖: (๑♡ ⌓♡๑) What are you trying to do, you little minx?

Me: jst thot u should kno (*^ ‿ <*)♡

💖: You’re making it so much more difficult for me to stay away.

💖: Keep this up and I might just rush to your place anyway. Tear your clothes off and fuck you rough and hard, not stopping even if Kiryu-san comes home.

Me: would u cum inside me agen sensei?

💖: Yes, I’d fill you right up with me again, let it drip out of you and make a mess of your futon.

Me: wat if ojisan came home?

💖: I’d look him in the eye while I keep fucking you and tell him he’ll just have to wait. He could try to grab me, pull me, tear me away from you, and I still wouldn't stop.

Haruka was feeling her arousal build quickly, and she rubbed her thighs together.

Me: r u getting hard sensei?

💖: Incredibly. Every time I think of you like that, whether it be on your knees for me, on your back ready to receive me, or sitting waiting for me to go down on you, I feel like I might explode.

He then sent her a photo. Even before it finished loading, she knew what it was. Her first dick pic, she was amazed he hadn’t sent her one sooner. He was laying in his bed, his cock at full attention, and he was grasping it firmly.

💖: See what you do to me, my love? 

Me: i cant exactly send a pic but ur doin the same 2 me

💖: Can you send me a picture of you, anyway?

💖: I want to see you, any part of you will do.

Me: one sec

Haruka got up and moved to the bathroom. If Ojisan came home while she was trying to take a risqué picture of herself in their bedroom, she’d never be able to look him in the eye again, let alone cuddle with him after a nightmare.

She closed the blinds all the way, triple-checked that the door was locked, and turned on the fan to hide any potential noises. She started coy at first and took a picture from above, lifting her shirt just to show her bra, biting her lips. Was this the angle he always saw her in?

💖: Beautiful. But I want to see more of you.

She took her shirt off but kept her bra on. Her necklace and charm bracelet were now easily visible, and she cheekily looped her thumb around the waistband of her pants, winking.

💖: Stunning. 

💖: More.

She took her pants off but still kept all her undergarments on and took a mirror selfie, playing with her ponytail. She couldn’t pinpoint what it was about her ponytail that he loved so much, but she was more than willing to use it for times like this.

💖: im getting close angel show me more

She finally removed her bra and took a photo of herself but covered her nipples with her arm. Before sending it, she took another with her breasts in full view and sent them both, one after the other.

💖: you little tease

💖: show me that beautiful cunt of yours

She blushed at such a vulgar word being used before taking her panties off and was now completely naked. With her back to the mirror, she bent over and took another picture of the mirror. She took a few more of herself at several angles and sent all of them to him at once.

💖: fuck baby

💖: your gorgeous

He then sent her a video, and she fished her earbuds out of her pants pocket. She spent way too long untangling them enough to be usable before finally plugging them in and watching what he sent. It was of him rubbing his cock, his groans guttural and uncontrolled. Then he orgasmed, his cum spurting out of him onto his hand and pants, his final moan long and deep, and he let it be loud and desperate for her. The sound of him cumming was channeled straight to her ears, and her arousal only built.

He then sent another video, of his face this time. He was lounging in his bed, a lit cigarette in his mouth, his free arm resting behind his head. He had the most satisfied grin on his face. He moved his free arm and held the cigarette to take in a long puff and blew out the smoke.

“That was fun. Anything I can do for you?” he asked in the video, cigarette between to fingers. She was about to start recording a video of her own, but she was still much too paranoid to say anything, even with the loud fan on and the sound not traveling easily in and out of the bathroom.

Me: ill use our little chat from b4 (^.~)☆

💖: Ok, let me know if there’s anything more you’d like from me.

💖: I’d be more than happy to do anything you ask of me ♡(>ᴗ•)

💖: I wouldn’t mind a little video of you cumming too (❤ω❤) If you’re able.

After some hesitation, Haruka laid herself down in the bathtub. While she still thought about her attempt every time she used it or even looked at it, it was the most comfortable spot to lie in in the bathroom. She started thinking about the sexting they’d just done, what they’d done that morning, and what they’d done the night before as well. She placed her hand between her legs and gently rubbed herself, rewatching the video he sent of him cumming over and over. His moans of pleasure, his uncontrolled breathing, her knowledge that it was all because of her and how much he wanted her, it all got her close, fast. She inserted a finger and used her wetness as a lube before returning to her clit, making it easier to play with herself. It didn’t take long for her to get back to where she was before she got up from her futon. As her breath became heavy, she FaceTimed with Shu-chan, earbuds still in, and he quickly answered.

“Hey, angel, what—oh, fuck,” he said. She angled the phone so he could see her bare torso and her hand rubbing harder and harder against herself. She started to breathe faster as she saw his face. He was still smoking, and he stared at her, mesmerized. She saw him press some buttons on his phone before returning to paying attention to her. “God, you’re so hot. Are you gonna cum for me, angel?” She lifted the camera so her face was in view but avoided looking at the front-facing camera in the corner that showed her face. She wasn’t so confident and comfortable that she could stare at her own aroused face, especially while someone else was already watching her.

She nodded, and he swore again. She was so close now, and little moans left her throat that she had to work hard to suppress.

“God, you’re making me hard again. I wish I was there so I could fuck you, fuck you into oblivion until all you can think about is me and my cock pounding into you.” She was at the edge now, and he knew it, too. “Cum for me, Haruka-chan.”

Her legs locked around her hand as her orgasm washed over her, and she had to grit her teeth to not let a single sound escape her lips. Some still did, and she briefly wondered if he could hear her through the little microphone in the earbuds above the loud fan. She hoped he did. When she finally was back on earth, she looked at her phone again, and Shu-chan was right there, savoring what he had just witnessed.

“Wow, that was amazing,” he said. She turned her eyes away and smiled. “I hope you don’t mind that I took a screen recording of that. It’s perfect material for when you’re not around.” She blushed a little and looked back at him. He smiled softly. “You’re so beautiful.” 

She carefully brought the earbud mic to her mouth and softly said, “I gotta go.”

“Ok, I’ll talk to you soon.”

“Ok. Bye. I love you.”

“Love you, too.”

☆☆☆

After Ojisan finally returned home from work, Seonhee’s demeanor completely changed. She was suddenly much quieter and more reserved—even her smile was much smaller.

“How long will you be in Kamurocho?” Haruka asked her during dinner.

“Well, I’ve already been here longer than I anticipated, so I have no idea.”

“Ojisan said you were in hiding, right? From who? Or what?”

“Haruka—”

“It’s ok, Kiryu-san. I like her curiosity,” she said with a smile. “She reminds me a lot of myself, actually.” Seonhee then explained that she was looking for someone but couldn’t let certain people know she was looking. Haruka tried to probe further, but the woman knew how to keep her lips tight.

“Are you sure it's ok for someone like her to stay here, Ojisan?” Haruka asked, not at all caring that Seonhee was still there to hear the question.

“I trust Majima-no-nii-san’s judgment. If he says to trust her, I will.”

“He trusted Saejima, too.” Ojisan’s face dropped, and Haruka threw her hands to her mouth. She surprised even herself by saying that. She hadn’t even said that man’s name that day in the gymnasium during her first week of high school when she confronted him, and Majima-san then destroyed him with his fists. She hadn’t even wondered about his whereabouts.

Her breath quickened. Her heart flew. She looked at Ojisan, and, for what might be the first time in her life, she couldn’t read his face. Seonhee looked between the two of them but said nothing.

Haruka bolted up, knees knocking against the table as she did, ran to the bedroom, slamming the sliding door behind her, and collapsed on her futon.

“Sorry about her,” Ojisan said to Seonhee.

Sorry about me!? That’s what he’s apologizing for!?

“No, please, it’s ok. I was a teen girl, too, once upon a time. I don’t blame her for being scared that I might inadvertently disrupt your peaceful, civilian life, either.” Haruka was surprised at how much the woman was able to surmise, but she had mentioned she was the head of some large underworld organization, and you don’t get there by just being a pretty face. “This ‘Saejima’ person, I’m familiar with the name. Is he friends with Maji…”

Seonhee’s voice dampened as if Haruka had been dropped into the middle of the ocean, sinking further and further. Bile rose in her throat. Saying that man’s name was affecting her more than she could’ve predicted, and hearing it again only made it worse. She floated away from her futon that she was curled up on, out of her bedroom window, to the large tree outside of her apartment. She drifted through the cold, lonely streets of her neighborhood. She didn’t want to be anywhere anymore. 

She was vaguely aware of the voices in the apartment but couldn’t make out a single word. She was completely numb, she couldn’t feel anything at all.

Including her phone buzzing in her back pocket.

☆☆☆

Akiyama spent the rest of the day thinking about sleeping beside Haruka-chan for the first time the night before. Properly sleeping in a bed together until morning. He hadn’t shared a bed like that with someone for so long. He had almost forgotten how wonderful it was.

That morning, after he had dropped her off in a safe spot where no one would see her get out of his car, she had only grabbed her necessities, leaving a few things in his trunk. When he wasn’t thinking about spending the night with her, he was thinking about how to use them to keep her, to coax her back to his place.

When she finally left school after her club, he watched her on the tracker again during her entire walk to her apartment. He wanted to drive her, partly to make sure she stayed safe but also because, if he drove her, she wouldn’t be able to fight going back to his place instead. What would she do? Take over the steering wheel? Jump out of the car? But he didn’t get the chance to ask to drive her.

Once she was approaching her apartment, he closed the tracker app and opened the app for the cameras.

No cameras were connected.

He closed the app and reopened it.

Nothing was connecting.

Dread and terror grew in his chest. What happened to the cameras!? Was there some sort of electrical or internet issue? Did someone find them and take them all down? Was someone waiting for her at her apartment!? 

He closed the app and called her.

“Hi, Shu-chan—”

“Haruka-chan, thank god, you’re ok!”

“Uh, yeah, why wouldn’t I be?” He stammered.

“Uh, um, well, I, uh, heard there was a mugging near your place, and I just wanted to check on you! Yeah, that’s it!” He was quite proud of coming up with that little lie, and so smoothly, too!

“Uh-huh.”

“Is Kiryu-san home?”

“No, I think he took another extra shift today.”

“I’m coming over—”

“No! You can’t!”

“What? Why?”

“I don’t know when he’s coming back, I don’t want you to have to escape through the bathroom window or something.”

“But I still have some of your stuff in the trunk of my car. Don’t you want me to come drop them off?”

“Hold onto them, I’ll get them next time I come over.”

“Do you not want to see me?” Had he done something wrong again? Was she annoyed with him about something he’d said or done?

“Oh my god, Akiyama-san, that’s not true and you know it!” She used his family name. She definitely was annoyed with him about something. He sighed.

“You’re right. I’m sorry. I guess after having you all to myself last night I’m going through some sort of emotional withdrawal.” It was Haruka’s turn to sigh. 

“I love you.” He chuckled softly.

“I love you, too. Please respond whenever I text you tonight, ok? I’ll keep thinking about that break-in, otherwise.”

“I thought you said it was a mugging?”

Fuck. How is she so good at keeping up with all her lies when I can’t even remember what I said eight sentences ago!

“Did I? Sorry, I meant break-in.”

“Ok, I’ll make sure to keep an eye on my phone. I’ll talk to you soon, I guess.”

“Yeah, ok.” He paused. “I miss you so much. I wish I could be with you every second.”

“I do, too.”

“Ok, I won’t keep you any longer. Bye, I love you.”

“Bye, I love you, too.”

At least she was safe. For now.

He rested on his bed and kept an eye on her tracker, watching it move back and forth in the tiny box that was her apartment. Sometimes, it would stay still for several minutes, and he would start to worry it was because she was dead on the floor, but it always moved eventually. As he was staring at his phone, he received a notification. Somehow, she was the first to text him. That meant that he was being perfectly reasonable after all.

😇🩷🌸 Haruka-chan 🌸🩷😇: im still carrying ur cum inside me sensei (✿◦’ᴗ˘◦)♡

Me: (๑♡ ⌓♡ ๑) What are you trying to do, you little minx?

After exchanging more texts, he wanted to push the conversation along. When she asked if he was getting hard, he took the opportunity to follow his response up with a photo of his cock. He no longer had legal consequences of sending her such illicit photos, it was about time he took advantage of that.

Me: See what you do to me, my love? 

😇🩷🌸 Haruka-chan 🌸🩷😇: i cant exactly send a pic but ur doin the same 2 me

Me: Can you send me a picture of you, anyway?

Me: I want to see you, any part of you will do.

😇🩷🌸 Haruka-chan 🌸🩷😇: one sec

And he got exactly what he was hoping for. She was quick to oblige, taking increasingly raunchy photos, and she looked so confident, too. He was in awe of her beauty. He loved her so much.

Me: show me that beautiful cunt of yours

He regretted that wording immediately after pressing send. He was so fogged with lust for her that his filter had dissolved. But she still sent him a photo. Many, in fact. Stunning photos of her completely bare, every part of her on display, just for him. Including her scars. But he was so mesmerized by her beauty that he wasn’t even bothered by them. Him seeing them meant that she was still there, alive, and, hopefully, healing as well.

Me: fuck baby

Me: your gorgeous

His screen being bombarded by her was enough to push him over the edge. And since she had gone to so much trouble, he had to return the favor. He clumsily opened his camera app and pressed record, just in time for his orgasm to reach its peak. He didn’t hold back, either, letting his moans and breaths go completely untethered, his cum landing on his hand and pants without care. Just pure, raw pleasure, all because of her.

He lit himself a cigarette, and it might have been the best cigarette he’d ever had. Smoking after fucking her was probably even more amazing, but he knew she wouldn’t have it. He sent her a follow-up video, asking if there was anything he could do for her. She deserved an amazing orgasm, too, of course.

😇🩷🌸 Haruka-chan 🌸🩷😇: I’ll use our little chat from before (^.~)☆

Me: Ok, let me know if there’s anything more you’d like from me.

Me: I’d be more than happy to do anything you ask of me ♡(>ᴗ•)

Me: I wouldn’t mind a little video of you cumming too (❤ω❤) If you’re able.

That last message was a bit of a longshot—it was unlikely she actually would go through with that. But now she knew he wanted one, she’d get it to him eventually. Turns out, he didn’t have to wait long at all.

He received a FaceTime call from her, and he answered as soon as he saw it, eager to know what she wanted to show him.

“Hey, angel, what—oh, fuck.” Right there on his screen was her, naked, her breasts in clear view, her hand between her legs. God, this might be the hottest thing she had ever done. He quickly started screen-recording the call, desperate to save this masterpiece. “God, you’re so hot. Are you gonna cum for me, angel?” She moved the camera to show her face. Her gorgeous, aroused face. “God, you’re making me hard again.” Her little moans were caught by the tiny microphone on her earbuds. “I wish I was there so I could fuck you, fuck you into oblivion until all you can think about is me and my cock pounding into you.” She was at the edge now, and he knew it, too. “Cum for me, Haruka-chan.”

She came as if on command, and all he could do was stare at the scene he was so blessed to be able to witness in its purest state.

“Wow, that was amazing,” he said. She turned her eyes away and smiled. “I hope you don’t mind that I took a screen recording of that. It’s perfect material for when you’re not around.” She blushed a little and looked back at him. He smiled softly. “You’re so beautiful.” 

She carefully brought the earbud mic to her mouth and softly said, “I gotta go.”

“Ok, I’ll talk to you soon.”

“Ok. Bye. I love you.”

“Love you, too.”

Akiyama was more than satisfied after that. He rewatched that video of her over and over, casually rubbing his cock, not going too rough to savor the video that much more. It still didn’t take too long before he came again.

Afterward, he tried to restrain himself from contacting her as much as he could. He didn’t want to come across as the possessive boyfriend who had to be in control of everything she did. He just had to know her exact location at all times and every single thing she was doing at any given moment, that was all. It was all just to make sure she was staying alive. Her attempt took him so off guard, he wasn’t about to let her try again. Not if he had anything to do with her.

He tried to distract himself as much as possible—he read the evening news, he cooked dinner, he scrolled on Vine while eating, he even tried to tackle some paperwork from Sky Finance that had been hovering over his head for months. But nothing kept his mind occupied long enough. 

He couldn't take it any longer, and he texted her to check on her. When she didn’t respond within a few seconds, his anxiety spiked. He counted to 10, then did so again, and a third time. After no response, he texted her again. He counted to 15. He counted again. And again. Still nothing. He called her. It went to voicemail after several rings. He tried again. Voicemail.

He was in his car before he even realized what he was doing. Around the corner from her apartment. Jogging up the stairs of her building. Running to any window he could find.

The blinds to her bedroom window were open. And there she was, lying motionless on her futon, alone.

He scrambled to find a way to open the window. It wasn’t locked, and he pushed it open as swiftly as possible while still not letting it creak and held his breath before hoisting himself up and into her room in one smooth motion. She didn’t move. But at least now he could see she was breathing.

He lowered himself on all fours and slowly crawled towards her as he heard Kiryu-san and a woman talking in the living room. It still surprised him how easily sound traveled in this apartment, he could make out the conversation as if he were sitting right next to them.

“I just got a text from Han. Looks like they might have already learned something about the cameras.” Akiyama froze in place. He didn’t even breathe.

“Your boys really are quick.”

“Only the best work for me.”

“Did he say what they found?”

“No, he still doesn’t think it’s safe to share over text. Who knows if whoever put up all those cameras has any other tracking device in here somewhere.” Akiyama started to feel dizzy. He was caught between making sure Haruka-chan was alright and jumping back out of the window and disappearing into the night, never to be seen again.

In the quietest whisper he could possibly manage, he said, “Haruka-chan.” She didn’t move. He looked around for something he could roll towards her to let her know he was there without scaring her. No way could he hide or leave before Kiryu-san ran into the room and saw him there if she so much as flinched too loudly. He crawled around her to get in her line of sight, all while listening to the conversation that was still easily heard.

“Do you plan on checking on her? Or is she the type of girl that needs to be left alone?” the woman asked.

“I guess I should check on her. She can be pretty mopey sometimes. She’ll just go completely quiet and still if something really upsets her. Sometimes, it seems like she doesn’t even notice anything that’s happening around her when she gets like that. Like she’s not even there at all.”

Akiyama was spidering over to her closet before Kiryu-san even finished speaking and was closing the door as he heard him stand up. He had to perch on her small set of drawers, her clothes on hangers draping over him. He was completely surrounded by her scent. She wouldn't miss one of her tops that was crumpled on top of the dresser. He grabbed it and brought it to his nose. Yes, she definitely had worn it. She was all over it.

The sound of the bedroom door sliding open brought him out of it, and he held his breath as he listened to Kiryu-san walk over to Haruka-chan.

“Haruka,” he said, and Akiyama could hear him shuffle to sit beside her. He said her name again, and Haruka-chan vaguely vocalized a neutral noise. “Do you want to talk about it?”

“What’s there to talk about?” she asked him after several seconds of silence.

“Anything. Seonhee, Majima, you. Anything.” She sighed heavily, her breath a bit shaky.

“I thought we left all of this behind,” she said, her voice wavering. When Kiryu-san didn't respond, she continued. “I thought we weren’t going to do this anymore. That the only reason we even came back to this fu— goddamn city was because it would be safe for us.” Kiryu-san sighed.

“I know. I understand—”

“Do you!?” There was loud shuffling as she quickly sat up. “I never asked for any of this! I never wanted any of this! I wasn’t the one who decided to join the yakuza before going to high school! Just because we’ve lived our whole fu— goddamn lives like this doesn’t mean we can just keep doing it!”

“Things were fine at Morning Glo—”

“Really!? Are you sure!? Don’t you remember why we even closed that place down!?”

“Well, I mean—”

“‘Cause all the kids were in danger all the time! You just had to befriend the local family there—”

“It’s not like I tried to—”

“But you could’ve stopped!”

“But they’re good—”

“You didn’t know that! Not for sure! And they just kept looping you into all of their bullsh— crap that it was like we never even left Kamurocho! Why’d you even bother dissolving the Tojo clan if you were just going to let these guys keep ruining our lives!?”

“Haruka, I—”

“Forget it!” Akiyama heard Haruka-chan suddenly stand and run out of the room, front door opening and slamming shut. Kiryu-san sighed and stood up with a groan.

“Why’s it so cold in here?” he asked himself. He walked a few paces, and Akiyama could hear him shut the window, sigh again, and walk out of the room. It was then that Akiyama’s phone went off. He fumbled in his pocket to silence it as Kiryu-san returned to the room. He held his breath and didn’t exhale until he heard him leave again. Then he checked his phone.

😇🩷🌸 Haruka-chan 🌸🩷😇: r u home rn?

Me : No, I’m out taking care of some stuff, why?

😇🩷🌸 Haruka-chan 🌸🩷😇: had a fight wit ojisan

😇🩷🌸 Haruka-chan 🌸🩷😇: i feel like gettin a drink

😇🩷🌸 Haruka-chan 🌸🩷😇: so i should c u instead

While he was texting her, Akiyama overheard the woman ask Kiryu-san if he was going after her.

“No, she’s probably long gone already.”

“You think she’ll be safe out there?” He didn’t respond for a while.

“I’ll text her.”

Me : Ok, I can wrap up what I’m doing real quick and come get you.

Me : Are you still at your apartment?

😇🩷🌸 Haruka-chan 🌸🩷😇: i jus ran out

😇🩷🌸 Haruka-chan 🌸🩷😇: slammed the door n evrythin

😇🩷🌸 Haruka-chan 🌸🩷😇: ugh i feel lik such a teen

Me : I mean, you still are.

😇🩷🌸 Haruka-chan 🌸🩷😇: ( ⇀ ‸↼‶) 

😇🩷🌸 Haruka-chan 🌸🩷😇: u kno wat i mean

“I have some other friends I can reach out to, too,” Kiryu-san continued.

Me: Are you walking around? Or just standing in the cold?

😇🩷🌸 Haruka-chan 🌸🩷😇: im @ the bottom of the stairs

😇🩷🌸 Haruka-chan 🌸🩷😇: i feel like running 5 miles

Me: Stay where you are, I’m already on my way.

He got a different notification and opened it.

Kiryu 🐉: Akiyama-san , Haruka ran off from the apartment .  Can you reach out to her and let me know if you hear anything from her ?

Another text from Haruka-chan came through.

😇🩷🌸 Haruka-chan 🌸🩷😇: no txting while driving!

Me: I’m using speech to text.

😇🩷🌸 Haruka-chan 🌸🩷😇: fine

😇🩷🌸 Haruka-chan 🌸🩷😇: ill wait 4 u where u usually pick me up

Me: No, no need, just stay put.

😇🩷🌸 Haruka-chan 🌸🩷😇: y?

Me: It’ll be even colder if you wait in the dark away from the heated apartment. Just stay there, I’ll text you when I park.

😇🩷🌸 Haruka-chan 🌸🩷😇: fine

He returned to Kiryu-san’s text.

Me : Will do! Want me to reach out to anyone else? I can even go out looking for her if you would like.

Kiryu 🐉: Up to you if you want to go that far .  Thank you .

At that, Akiyama stuffed the shirt of hers he was holding inside his suit jacket, slowly opened her closet door, and gently lowered his foot to the floor, toes first. Kiryu-san had turned on some panel show and was talking about it with the same woman. Hopefully, the TV was loud and distracting enough. Akiyama tip-toed to the window and opened it. It wasn’t smooth, and it squeaked slightly. He paused. Kiryu-san was still watching the TV. He lifted the window just enough to climb out with only a little difficulty and shut the window as much as he could from the outside.

He turned and stared at the giant tree and hyped himself up before hopping on the railing once more and bounding to the tree. The branches rustled, and he once again froze. No one came around to inspect the sound. He crawled on the branches until he was over the sidewalk, dangled down from it, and dropped himself onto the pavement a few feet away from where he parked his car.

I gotta do rock climbing or something if I’m going to keep doing this.

He got in his car, turned on the engine, and waited a moment to catch his breath and let the car warm up. He stuffed the shirt of hers he had stolen in the glove compartment for safekeeping and texted Haruka-chan that he was waiting for her. She was running around the corner in seconds.

“Hi, angel,” he said as she opened the door and climbed in the car. “What happened? You said you had a fight with Kiryu-san?”

“Yeah,” she said, arms crossed and staring straight ahead.

“What about?”

“I’d rather not talk about it.”

“That’s fine, I understand. Where do you want to go?”

“Anywhere that isn’t here. God, I want a drink so badly.”

“Well, I’m not getting you anything. You understand that, right?” She nodded. “Alright. Want to go to the city? Or the park? Or—”

“ Just… pick somewhere!”

“Ok.” He placed his hand on her thigh and began driving.

☆☆☆

Akiyama wanted to drive Haruka-chan straight to his place but decided on the city instead. She needed to let off some steam first.

“Drive faster!” she demanded as they traveled. He pressed on the gas pedal. “Faster!” She rolled her window down, the curious, cool night air blowing in. “God, it’s so hot in here!”

“Hey, we can’t have people seeing me drive you around!” he said, trying to reach for the button to lower the window again.

“Let the whole world look in!” She stuck her face out the window. “Who cares who sees anything!” she declared to the street they were charging down. She reached for the buttons to open the sunroof, unbuckled her seatbelt, and started to stand.

“Haruka-chan! Sit down!” he yelled, trying to grab at her to pull her back to her seat, but she just shoved and kicked him away. She stood with one foot on the center console, the other on her seat. He darted his eyes between her and the road ahead of him. She spread her arms out wide, her ponytail billowing behind her, and she giddily shrieked into the night.

She eventually sat back down again, and he pushed the button to close the sunroof as soon as her head was back inside the car.

“Haruka-chan, don’t you fucking dare do that again, do you understand!?” he yelled through gritted teeth.

“Ugh, what -ever!”

They soon reached Kamurocho, and Haruka-chan ran out of the car before he even finished parking. If he weren’t scared of people seeing them together, he would’ve yelled out to her and tackled her to the ground. And even that might not have been enough to stop her. What was up with her tonight!?

He managed to catch up with her on her way to the arcade and let her play whatever game she wanted while he caught his breath. Haruka-chan was less focused and messed up a lot more than usual. She still was above average, despite that and being out of practice. Once she started, she couldn’t stop and played each and every game there more than once.

After, she dragged him out of the arcade and said, “That wasn’t enough! We gotta do something else!” She looked around, and it didn’t take long for her eyes to wander to the street on the east side of the arcade.

The street to the hotel district.

Akiyama noticed she was staring and looked in the same direction. Even if she wasn’t 18, they never check IDs when checking in at a love hotel. He looked back at her, and she looked up at him. 

“You know we have school tomorrow,” he said. She continued to stare up at him with fierce determination.

He glanced around for a moment, grabbed her hand, and led her up the street.

Chapter Text

There weren’t many options in the hotel district, despite the very purpose of the area being for love hotels. Akiyama would’ve preferred a more deluxe locale for his first time at a love hotel with Haruka-chan, but she wasn’t in the mood to go searching for someplace nice. 

He decided not to wonder if she had ever gone to a love hotel with one of her buyers.

While most hotels were wholly automated, the one they entered still had a human sitting behind the front desk. There was, thankfully, a privacy curtain blocking her face and, hopefully, their faces from her.

Despite the quality of the place not being of a high standard, there were still a few interesting themes and amenities available. He asked some probing questions to help decide which room, but she groaned and pushed a button at random. Unsure of how Haruka-chan would feel at any given moment for the rest of the night, Akiyama simply paid for an entire night’s worth. 

Haruka-chan restlessly bounced on her feet during the elevator ride up and was the one to grab his hand and drag him to the room they had booked. Upon entrance, she flung herself on him, crashing her lips into his, and he returned the kiss eagerly. She was too impatient even to get as far as the bed and pulled him down onto the floor.

Akiyama froze for a moment—last time he was on top of her on the floor, she had what he now understood was a flashback and a panic attack, and suffered for months after. But nothing of the sort happened this time. This time, she wrapped her limbs completely around him, commanding him to take her.

She began grinding her hips against him, already breathing heavily, slight moans escaping her. Using one hand to keep himself propped up, he used the other to unbuckle his belt and unzip his pants. Haruka-chan refused to let him remove his lips from her at any moment, and he took longer than usual. Soon enough, though, his cock was free, and he pulled down her tights and panties just far enough and was inside her in seconds.

“Oh my god!” she gasped out as he quickly pounded into her. She was almost dripping, and he had no problem going as fast as she demanded. “Don’t stop! Don’t stop!” she shouted, angling and grinding her hips in a way that rubbed her clit against him. She grasped desperately at his shirt, and her moans were less and less controlled. “Fuck!” she gasped out before another high moan escaped her throat, her eyes rolling back. Akiyama stopped, believing that maybe now she had gotten everything out of her system and that she would want a break.

He was so wrong. She pushed him up and off of her, and for a moment, he was terrified that she might have a panic attack after all. Instead, she sat up and demanded he help remove her boots while she removed her hoodie and pulled down her tights and panties. Now, in just a t-shirt and skirt, she pushed him backward on the floor, and crawled over him, kissing him deeply while unbuttoning his shirt. As she did, he let his hands wander up under her skirt, her ass and pussy free for him to touch. Once his shirt was completely unbuttoned, she reached behind her and grabbed his cock, stroking it. He closed his eyes and sighed before feeling her raise her hips and shift backward. She was about to lower herself onto him, but first she teased him more, rubbing her pussy up and down his shaft. He grasped her thigh, lips pursed in anticipation. Finally, she raised herself up and slid his cock inside her. She leaned forward, resting her hands on his chest, and bounced her hips up and down. His fingers dug further into her thighs at the growing pleasure. Somehow, in this position, he felt like he could get even farther inside her. 

To think that, almost two years ago, she was on top of him in the same position. Both were fully clothed on the floor of his classroom, the chair he had fallen off of lying on its side not far from them. Looking back, they both probably wanted to do this even then.

After a few heavy slams, she moved more lightly and slowly. He could feel each pump of her so completely and was dangerously close to cumming. She leaned forward and kissed him, sloppy and desperate. It was Akiyama’s turn to be impatient, and he carefully thrust his hips upward as she continued to kiss him. She took the hint and sat back up, bouncing on him again, but she was getting tired.

“Come here,” he growled, and sat up, kissing her again. Her lips, her cheeks, her neck, her clavicle. In his excited, lustful haze, he didn’t even care that he was kissing her so strongly that she would likely get a hickey. Let the people see, let them all see that she was his and his alone. 

He pushed her backward so she was on the floor again and removed himself from her. Hovering over her, he turned so he could lick her pussy and then thrust his cock into her mouth. Not the traditional way to 69, but she was bringing the dominating side out of him, and he loved it. He let her cough and sputter as he thrust his cock down her throat. She knew how to use her hands to angle his cock in a way she could handle. She was capable of shifting her head in a way that he wouldn’t suffocate her. Meanwhile, he devoured her pussy. She was always so delicious, her wetness an elixir that made him almost go feral.

He pulled himself up and looked at her. Her face was covered in her spit, a mess from trying to manage his cock being forced into her. She scrambled back up and brought her lips to his again, and he lifted her to carry her so they could finally get to the bed already. He threw her down and hurriedly removed his jacket with his already unbuttoned shirt while kicking off his shoes, while she removed her skirt. He flipped her over, her knees on the bed propping her hips up. He dropped his pants and boxers, kicked them off his feet, and shoved them to the side.

It was his turn to tease her now, and he touched the tip of his cock to her entrance before removing it and resting it on top of her. He grasped her ass and thrust against her, and she wiggled her hips with impatience. He couldn’t take it any longer either and slammed his cock into her. She threw her head up and moaned loudly in surprise. He pounded into her and grabbed her ponytail to keep her upright. God, she felt amazing.

At both of their apartments, they never completely let themselves lose control, fearing the amount the neighbors might hear. His neighbors had probably seen him enter and exit his apartment with a young student in her uniform. Her neighbors might not have seen him at her place, but they definitely knew she lived with a man who was even older than him. Likely many of them knew they weren’t actually a father and a daughter, and who knew what conclusions they may jump to if they heard her fucking a grown man. But here, everything was soundproofed, no one knew anyone else, and no one even saw anyone else. Here, they could be as loud and rough and dangerous as they wanted.

Suddenly, he was close and asked her if she was ok with him cumming.

“As long as you know I’m not done!” she said. He kept going, slamming into her, and just as he was about to cum, he removed himself and came all over her back, onto the shirt she still hadn’t taken off. He swore and was ready to collapse, but knew she meant it when she said she wasn’t done. He took a few breaths as she stood and removed her shirt, some of his cum getting in her hair. There was a bathtub, she could clean it off later.

Finally, she removed her bra, and both were now completely naked. She shifted on the bed so her head was on the pillows and opened her legs, staring at him. He crawled onto the bed and rested himself down, his mouth ready for her. She leaned her head back, and he lifted his hand to grab her breast as he licked her. So soft and supple. He absolutely worshiped her. He would throw himself at her feet. She was the one dominating him now, and he loved that even more.

She rested her hand on his head, playing with his hair. Her initial energy seemed to have finally died down as she let herself savor his head between her legs. She was letting herself savor it so much that his tongue was getting tired before she seemed to even be getting close.

“I think there’s some toys around here. Want me to grab one?” he asked her. After how she had reacted when he showed her the toys he had bought her the night before, he didn’t expect her to say yes. But to his surprise, she nodded, and he got up to search for one as she continued to slowly pleasure herself in his absence. He returned with a vibrator that previously had a single-use decontaminator wrapped around it. She asked him what it was, and he told her, describing the purpose of the rabbit sticking up from it and all the different settings. “Go ahead and play around with it,” he said, passing it to her while he caught his breath, pretending to inspect the bathtub.

The sound of buzzing at varying pitches and pauses echoed behind him while he stared at one of the scented bubble bath bottles, when she told him to come back over.

“Yes, ma’am,” he said with a smirk and stood. There she was, naked on the bed, vibrator set to her preferred setting. “What would you like me to do?”

“My hand is getting tired,” she said and passed the vibrator to him. Of course, that wasn’t true, she had hardly done anything with her hands so far. Still, he took the vibrator from her and slowly pushed it into her. She was so wet, he had no issue inserting the entire length into her, the rabbit resting nicely atop her clit. She lay back again, letting herself get washed away in her arousal. She bucked her hips, and he moved the vibrator in and out of her, slowly at first, but quickened the pace to match the speed of her hips. She grabbed at the sheets beneath her.

“Are you almost there?” he asked softly. She nodded, and he swore under his breath. She pushed his hand aside and took control over the vibrator, sitting it at exactly the right spot, and he watched her orgasm in front of him, pushing the rabbit against her clit to make it last longer.

She fumbled her fingers to turn it off and looked up at him with a satisfied smile.

Wednesday, 07 January 2015

It was past midnight, and Haruka wasn’t even remotely tired enough to go to sleep. Not even the bath they took earlier did anything to help calm her. Her body was clean and her hair cum-free, but she still had so much pent-up, restless energy. She felt like she’d never been depressed in her entire life. Meanwhile, Shu-chan was dozing off every few seconds beside her on the bed.

She tried to stay still, to finally just calm the fuck down, but nothing was working, not even her breathing exercises that usually helped at least a little bit. She crawled off the bed and over to her skirt on the floor, her phone in her pocket. She checked it. 22 missed calls. 43 unread texts. Many were from Ojisan, but plenty were from Majima-san, Nishiki, Date-san, and Daigo-nii-san. She swiped all of the notifications away, leaving them all unread. Rage started to build in her again as she replayed the argument she had with Ojisan in her head, and her restless energy filled right back up. She quickly stood and returned to the bed where Shu-chan was snoring and shook him awake.

“Shu-chan, wake up!” He started and looked around, unsure of where he was or what was going on.

“Huh!? What!? Wh—”

“Let’s go.” He got up without argument, and they both got dressed. He checked his watch after wrapping it around his wrist again. 

“Damn, it’s late.”

“What, is it past your bedtime, old man?”

“Ha ha. Where are we going?”

“Back to my apartment,” she said and, when she saw a flash of disappointment on his face, followed up with, “I need to grab my uniform and school bag. I’m staying the night at your place again.” His face lit up at that, and she couldn’t help but feel like she had won the lottery.

At the lobby of the love hotel, Shu-chan had her wait inside while he stepped out and scoped out the area. Once he was confident no one would see them, he beckoned her over, and she dashed out. They kept a quick pace until they were a fair distance away from the hotel district, but Haruka wasn’t physically capable of just meandering either. She grabbed his hand, forcing him to keep up with her. She didn’t even bother looking around as they walked, not caring who saw. Suddenly, Shu-chan pulled her behind a giant concrete pillar as they were passing the entrance to the parking garage under the Millennium Tower. He covered her mouth with his hand when she was about to protest and shushed in her ear.

In a whisper quieter than she had ever heard him make, he said, “I saw Date-san patrolling at the end of the street.” He glanced back around the pillar. “Let’s separate. Here’s my car keys,” he said, shoving them in her hand. “You head to my car, and I’ll go where I saw Date-san. I’ll meet back up with you soon.” At that, he let her go, gave her a peck on the cheek, and started walking down the street toward Date-san. Haruka watched him walk, then dashed down a different road in search of his car.

☆☆☆

Akiyama wasn’t surprised to see Date-san, he was probably looking for Haruka-chan. Everyone was probably scared that she ran off to get a drink or meet up with someone again. If he walked enough, he’d probably see Majima-san, too, if not others besides.

“Akiyama-san!” he heard from a block over and looked in the direction the voice came from.

“Oh, Date-san! Looking for Haruka-chan, too?”

“Yeah, I am. No one’s heard from her for hours, it seems. I’m tempted to call the actual police.”

“That might not be a bad idea.” He looked at his phone and tapped on the screen randomly. “Nope, still nothing from her for me, either.” Date-san sighed.

“I’m scared for her, you know? A few months ago, I found her in Public Park 3, some guy was on top of her on the bench—” Akiyama went bug-eyed—she never told him that.

“When was this!? Who was he!? What did you do when you found her!?” he asked, grabbing Date-san’s arms as desperation built.

“Uh, September, I think, soon after summer break ended. Never seen the kid before or since, and I drove her home after.”

“How did she act!? Was she into it!?” Date-san stared at him, brows furrowed.

“Akiyama-san, those aren’t really appropriate questions you should be asking. But, no, she wasn’t, she was hitting him on his back with her fists, but the guy didn’t stop, so I threw him off of her.” Akiyama sighed with relief.

“Ok, good, that’s good—I mean, no, it’s not, it’s good you were there to protect her.”

“Uh-huh.” Akiyama remembered during the staff retreat, during Haruka’s first year of high school, and when they weren’t speaking to each other, Date-san all but told him he knew something was going on.

“Yeah, I mean, she’s just a little girl, you know? She’s already hardly had the chance to just be a kid.”

“Right. I’m going to go back to looking for her.”

“Me too! I’ll reach out if I find anything!” 

As Date-san walked off, Akiyama ran towards his car, replaying everything he said in his mind.

I overreacted! Fuck! If he ever stopped being suspicious, he’s definitely suspicious now!

When he got to his car, he saw Haruka-chan waiting in the passenger seat, her phone lighting up her face. He quickly got in, slammed the door, and shoved his lips onto hers.

“You’re gonna wanna lean over until we exit the city proper. Date-san isn’t the only one hunting for you,” he told her. She obliged and leaned over, but not over her knees, to the floor. She instead leaned towards him and began undoing his belt buckle. “What are you doing?”

“You told me to lean over, sensei.”

“You are absolutely insatiable,” he said, sliding his chair back so she had enough room. He began to drive, and she slowly sucked his cock as he exited the parking lot, tenderly rubbing her back.

As he drove, he saw Majima-san on the opposite sidewalk, and he briefly waved a hand after they locked eye. He then pretended not to notice Majima-san flagging him down. No matter how bent over Haruka-chan was, he was going to see her if he walked up to the car. In the rearview mirror, Akiyama saw him swing his hand, as if to say “forget him”. He then heard Haruka-chan moan a little, and he was brought back to what she was doing to him. He still only had a semi, not quite ready after everything they did at the hotel, but he wasn’t about to stop her—it was still incredibly enjoyable, and the fact she was doing this at all was amazingly sexy.

☆☆☆

She stayed down there until he told her they were close to her apartment. A block away, he turned off his headlights and cut the engine farther down the road than usual.

“You gonna be ok?” he asked her.

“Lemme see if the light’s still on.” She got out and ran to the fence, jumping up to catch one of the bars with her hands, planting her feet against the fence to steady herself. She caught a glimpse of her apartment, the light of the living room shining out into the night. She dropped back down, wiped her hands on her thighs, and returned to the car. “It’s still on. Ojisan is probably waiting up for me.”

“Need me to cause a distraction?” She raised a brow.

“Like what?”

“I don’t know.” He paused, pondering. “Maybe you can climb in through the window of your bedroom? Or the bathroom?”

“But how will I get there without someone seeing me walking up to the apartment?” He glanced up behind her, and she followed his gaze. There was the giant tree branch dangling over the sidewalk. “You’re kidding.”

“How do you think I escaped when I snuck into your bathroom a few months ago?” She sighed.

“I’ll need you to give me a boost.”

He got out of the car and walked directly under the tree branch. He knelt down, and she climbed onto his shoulders. With no issue, he stood up straight, and she carefully placed her feet onto his shoulders, grabbing the top of the fence next to them for support. When she was standing up on his shoulders, she grabbed the branch and hoisted herself up.

“You got it?” he whispered up to her. She nodded, and he gave her a thumbs-up. “I’ll wait here.” She carefully crawled along the branch toward her apartment, shimmying her way to the balcony. She crouched low on the branch, staring at the balcony she unfortunately had to jump to. She took a deep breath, then another, and shot herself forward. Her foot caught on the railing during her flight, and she ungracefully face-planted onto the wooden floor of the balcony.

“I’m ok!” she quietly called out. She waited until she was sure no one was going to come out and inspect the sudden sound of a girl falling onto wood, then slowly stood. The wood of the balcony creaked as she crept to the window of her bedroom, and the window squeaked as she pushed it open.

She waited, listening for Ojisan. All she heard was the TV playing some infomercials. No snoring, but also no voices. She climbed in and did a silent roll when she landed, and once again paused. Nothing. 

Me: all clear

Me: getting my uniform & bag now

💖: Maybe you should grab some extra sets of clothes and stuff. In case you want to wait a few days before coming back.

Me: gud idea

She needed no more convincing than that. She once again remembered the argument, and she didn’t feel any less angry than she had been several hours ago. She grabbed the largest bag she could find in her closet and stuffed it full with underwear, socks, shirts, anything she might need aside from her uniform and school bag. She already had her own toothbrush, shampoo, and pajamas there, along with other things that he had picked up for her over the past few weeks. He even had some of her favorite snacks on hand and bought a computer for her to use for whatever she may want.

“Just don’t hide what you’re looking up on there from me, ok?” he had made her promise.

Once she had everything in tow, she considered risking a look out into the living room. Instead, she dropped her bag out the window before climbing out and closing it behind her.

Me: im back out

Me: gonna throw my bag of stuff over the fence

“Ok,” she heard Shu-chan quietly call back. She hoisted the bag up and threw it, and it just barely reached the fence, catching the top of it before tipping over the side toward the street. She heard Shu-chan catch it, then climbed back onto the tree.

Finally, they were both back in his car again. After catching her breath, she surprised herself and started to sob.

“Hey, hey, hey, what’s wrong?” Shu-chan asked. Her shoulders violently shook as she put her head in her hands.

“I don’t know!”

“It’s been a long night. Let me take you home and get you all settled, ok? I’ll make you some tea and run you another bath, how does that sound?”

“You don’t have a bath!”

“Fine, you can take a warm shower,” he said. He lowered his voice to a volume she could hardly hear over her sobs. “I’ll do anything for you.”

“Then make it all stop!”

“I’ll do my best.” He patted her head, turned on his car, and began the short drive to his apartment.

Chapter Text

Maybe there was a god after all, because Akiyama was presented with the perfect opportunity on a platinum plate. Haruka-chan had packed enough clothes to spend a few days at his place, it wouldn’t be too difficult to make her stay even longer. He couldn’t keep an eye on her in her apartment anymore, and he couldn’t risk buying more cameras that would eventually be discovered. But if she stayed with him, all day every day, then he knew she was safe. He knew she was alive.

She was still filled to the brim with restless energy, and after they entered his apartment, she led him straight to the bedroom for yet another round. While Akiyama would usually be over the moon, he didn’t have the stamina of a teenage girl and had a hard time even getting it up. But that was what the toys were for, and now she was willing to tell him exactly what she wanted and how she wanted him to use them.

Afterwards, they both changed into their pyjamas, and he started the kettle for some tea. While waiting for the water to boil, he looked in his record collection for a good album to listen to.

“Want something happy? Sad? Angry?”

“Just pick something!” she demanded, slumping back on his couch. “Nothing too depressing,” she added more softly. He dug out another album that he had bought during one of his visits to New York City. He’d love to go there with her someday, share a place that he loved with the woman that he loved.

Through the speaker of the record player, light accordion and clarinet played, with the very faintest sound of a man saying ‘...we came in’. At first, Haruka-chan rolled her eyes. She was about to start complaining when a drum and guitar suddenly cut in, with an organ in strange accompaniment. The guitar came in electric, with that classic rock sound that anyone could sway their head to. Akiyama stood and began dancing with small motions. “What is this?” she asked.

“Pink Floyd’s The Wall. It’s a great album musically, but it's a real trip if you dive into the lyrics and the meaning behind the album.” He looked at her unconvinced face. “I take it you're not in the mood for artistic analysis, though.”

“Not really, but I’ll listen anyway.” A man began singing—or more like monologuing—to the audience.

‘So ya, thought ya, might like to, go to the show’

Akiyama stood and waited by the kitchen until the tea was ready, and the sound of a dive-bomber echoed through, followed by the sound of a baby crying.

While ‘The Thin Ice’ played, the tea was ready, and Akiyama brought two mugs with him to the couch and sat beside her. He was proud of her, he could tell she was still ready to tear herself to shreds, but was doing her best to calm down enough so she could actually go to sleep for school in the morning. Well, it already was morning, but still.

He kept her centered and distracted by explaining aspects of the album. How it was made because the lead of the band spat on an audience member, and the audience member liked it, and he wondered how he got there. How it was a project for the singer to look at each brick that made up the wall he had built around himself. Living through the Blitz in England during World War II, being beaten and humiliated by schoolteachers, his poor relationships with the women in his life, being treated as a commodity in the music industry. Akiyama explained all this and anything else he could possibly come up with, while also going quiet during his favorite parts.

He also kept talking to keep himself awake. It was way past his bedtime. Even now, he was falling back asleep, his head nodding every now and then.

“What do you usually do to fall asleep?” he asked her.

“Well, for a while I would just drink,” she said venomously.

“Ok, but what about before that?”

“I didn’t really need help falling asleep, staying asleep was the issue. Still is.” Akiyama had to wonder if she was purposely being difficult.

“Want to try meditating? I can see if I have some incense I can dig up.” That was one of the techniques for calming down mentioned frequently during his research on anxiety disorders.

“No, it’s fine,” she said, sighing. He looked at his watch.

“We gotta wake up for school in less than 5 hours—”

“Go to bed, I can sit out here by myself—”

“Nope, I’m not letting you do that.” She groaned.

“Then stop complaining!” He stopped talking altogether.

As the second side of the first record ended, Akiyama forced himself to stand and grab the second record of the album.

“You gotta hear the whole thing for the full experience.”

“I don’t even understand any of the words!” Akiyama had almost forgotten that she wasn’t fluent in English like he was. 

“You don’t like it?” he asked, standing by the record player.

“I didn’t say that,” she said, looking away and huffing again.

“You’re still nowhere near sleepy, are you?” he asked, putting his hands on his hips.

“I feel like I could explode.”

“Has this happened before?” Akiyama recalled one night when he had experienced something similar well over a decade ago, with that girlfriend he had thought of when washing Haruka-chan’s hair. She couldn’t sleep for three days straight, she deep-cleaned his entire apartment, didn’t show up to work, and believed she uncovered a conspiracy about North Korea kidnapping Japanese citizens on the coasts in the 70s and 80s. She even made an entire map on her wall like those cork boards with string you see in those crime shows. He was floored when the North Korean government admitted to doing it in 2002. A ‘manic episode’ was what she called it, and she had one every few months, apparently. That was why she didn’t like taking her medication for it, despite spending more time unbelievably depressed than manic.

“No, not like this.”

“Ok.” He stayed standing and thought for a while longer. He could take her out to the city again, find some other way to distract her, or even exhaust her, but people might still be out there looking for her. “Have you gotten any calls or anything?” he asked. She dug her phone out of her bag, stared at the screen, and scoffed.

“Yeah, dozens of calls and texts now.”

“You should probably tell your dad you’re safe. Tell him you’re staying with your friend or something. Majima-san and the others will see you at school, anyway, no point in hiding.”

“No. Let him be scared.”

“Why?”

“Maybe he’ll remember why we tried to leave that life in the first place.”

“What do you mean?”

“Never mind.” She dropped her phone carelessly back in her bag before staring back up at him. “What?” she asked, as though his staring at her was an intrusion.

“Tell me, I want to know.”

“It doesn’t concern you—”

“Haruka-chan, for the last time, stop saying something ‘doesn’t concern me’! You’re my girlfriend, the love of my life, my—”

“I’m your what?” she asked, bewildered.

“My girlfriend? Or did you somehow forget—”

“No, after that.” He paused.

“The… love of my life,” he said softly. She continued to stare at him. “Is that really such a surprise?” he asked, almost pityingly. It felt like she at times refused to believe he could love her as much as he did, be committed to her as much as he was. Was she not as committed as him? But she was the one who wore a white dress the night she… did that, as a way to pretend to be married to him. And no one would’ve even known that. She did that only for herself. He reached out his hand. “Come here.” She carefully approached him, taking his hand. “You are my entire life now. Everything I do, think, or say concerns you. No matter how life-altering or innocuous. And I hoped by now you’d view me the same way.” She paused for a long time, just staring at their conjoined hands. But he could see the gears turning in her mind.

“I… I just…” She pursed her lips, trying to find the right words. “I don’t want to scare you. I don’t…” Akiyama stayed silent, patiently waiting for her to put her thoughts out there. “After everything, I don’t want to say the wrong thing and make you think something bad.” After an extended silence, he spoke again.

“I don’t want you to keep secrets from me.”

“I know…”

“If I know what’s going on, what you’re feeling, what you’re thinking, at least then I can make an action plan. But if I’m left completely in the dark… I can only fear the worst.”

“And what if it’s worse than that?”

“See, it’s when you say ominous shit like that that I get scared.”

“But this time it’s… not my truth to tell. I just don’t like it.”

“How about you start by telling me about your fight with Kiryu-san.” Considering Akiyama was in the room during the fight, this was a perfect litmus test of how honest she was willing to be with him. She stood silent again, thinking.

“Remember how I said I wanted Ojisan to be scared?” He nodded. “Well, it’s kind of like when I was a kid and got kidnapped a bunch of times after he first found me. I disappeared, he didn’t know where I was. Then, after he had dissolved the Tojo Clan, plenty of people weren’t so quick to accept it. They used me to get to him. So, we escaped to Okinawa, to a remote road where we could live out the fantasy of a quiet, peaceful life, raising kids and everything.” Akiyama was ready to make a comment about not wanting to be branded as a kidnapper, but it wasn’t the time. “Do you know why we shut down the orphanage?”

“Because all the kids got adopted, right?”

“We could’ve taken more in at any time. But, instead, we decided not to. Because they never stopped trying to get to us. The ex-Tojo guys, I mean. There was a local family down there. They’re good people, and we even stayed at their family office last time we visited, but… They were still yakuza. They still had yakuza problems. And Ojisan was always so willing to help them. It put me and the kids in danger so many times. And soon, word spread that The Dragon of Dojima, the Fourth Chairman of the Tojo Clan, was living well in Okinawa. Plenty of people were jealous, said he didn’t deserve to live a good life after throwing them all away like that. It did slow down over the years, but the risk was always there. It was safest to close the orphanage instead of risking a child winding up in the crossfire. 

“Meanwhile, supposedly, Kamurocho had gotten safer. It was getting gentrified, a lot of the ex-Tojo guys had left for other cities that still had yakuza families, and the ones who didn’t were eventually able to find work once they surpassed five years of not being in the yakuza. It looked like it would soon be as if the yakuza never existed here at all. And things were good for a long time.” She squeezed his hand. “Certainly longer than I expected. But…” 

As Akiyama waited for her to continue, he slotted bits and pieces of what she told him into the life story that he knew of hers. And, so far, what she was saying aligned with everything he knew. That was a relief. She breathed deeply. 

“When I got home today, there was a stranger in our apartment. Apparently, it’s someone from some other underground organization that’s in hiding, and Ojisan agreed to let them stay with us. Ridiculous,” she spat out. “So, the fight was about him letting something like that happen again. I don’t see a good ending to any of this. And I feel like he doesn’t understand that this life is not normal, and not something to be thrust upon a girl who didn’t want it.” She told the truth, the entire story lined up. 

“You feel betrayed,” Akiyama said.

“Yeah… He didn’t even ask me if I was ok with it, didn’t even tell me someone was even there! I just walk in and someone I’ve never seen before is lying on our couch watching TV!” He could see the rage build in her all over again. She wasn’t going to get any sleep tonight, was she?

“I’ll stay up with you.”

“No, please, you need to sleep—”

“As do you, but here we are.” She sighed and rubbed his hand with her thumb. “Let’s find a game on the computer we can play together, ok?”

☆☆☆

Mayflower’s blog:

Entry #89

UGH i had a fight wit my dad

i ran away & am stayin wit A

i mite do tht 4 a few days idk

i hav evrythin i need here & he told me 2 bring enuff clothes in case i didnt want 2 go back home

ill still go 2 skool in teh mornin

my dad knos alot of my teachers

ill jst say im staying wit my freind

(SO PLZ PLAY ALONG IF UR READIN DIS)

c u soon

☆☆☆

Akiyama made himself some coffee, and they played Octodad: Dadliest Catch together for a couple of hours. The sun wasn’t yet rising, but it was still unbelievably late—or early, more like.

Haruka-chan was able to get a couple of hours of sleep, at least. Her head started to bob sometime after 3 am, and he seized the opportunity and carried her to bed. The alarm rang less than 3 hours later. It was going to be a rough day.

He did the same thing he had done the previous morning, dropping her off at the same spot for her to walk to school from, speeding to the school, and checking the tracker on her phone. The risk of her suddenly being gone never left, especially after how she had acted the night before.

After checking the tracker through his phone, Akiyama dashed straight to the faculty office, eager to chat with Majima-san and anyone else that Kiryu-san would’ve reached out to.

“Did any of you find her?” he asked as he walked in. Nishikiyama-san shot his head up.

“No! No one’s seen her!”

“Did Date-san contact the police?”

“No, I didn’t,” he said, rolling into sight on a wheely chair. “If she doesn’t come to school today, I will.”

“I fucking hate this. How did none of us find her!?” Majima-san exclaimed.

“This is troubling,” Dojima-sensei said. Akiyama didn’t even notice him leaning against the wall in contemplation beside him, and flinched. “Kiryu-san told me this morning that when he woke up, her uniform and school bag were gone. Maybe she snuck in late at night to grab them—”

“Or someone else did!” Majima-san added.

“Either way, she still might show up. Kasuga-san is waiting by the front gate, he’ll contact us immediately if he sees her.” Akiyama sighed.

“Ok. I’ll run to homeroom. She might walk in through a different entrance, she’s done that from time to time.”

“How would you know?” Majima-san probed, eye squinted.

“You may or may not remember this, but there was an extended period of time when she didn’t show up to homeroom at all,” he responded, sarcastically deadpan. “She’d avoid getting punished by one of the hall monitors by going through any number of ‘secret entrances’. Managed to pry that out of her not too long ago.”

“Sure.” Akiyama was ready to fight back, but Majima-san had that video. That video of Haruka-chan giving him a blowjob in the Champion District. He had no idea how much Majima-san was aware of now, or what he thought of their relationship at all. He clearly didn’t like any of it, though.

He left and dashed to homeroom, checking the tracker on his phone. Her phone was still moving at a walking pace to school. Good enough.

Before Haruka-chan arrived, Natsukawa-san showed up to homeroom. She paused at the door frame, then walked right up to him.

“Akiyama-sensei,” she said quietly. “Can I talk to you for a sec?”

Dread built in his chest. The last time she did this was the day after she found Haruka-chan face down in the bathtub.

“Sure.”

She guided him down the hall to a spot with fewer prying ears. She glanced around before looking up at him and saying, “Haruka-chan is staying with you, right?” His eyes widened.

“How do you—”

“She told me. Just wanted to let you know I’m going to play along. She’s staying at my place.”

“Ok,” he said after a beat. She nodded and walked back to homeroom.

How much did she know? How much had Haruka-chan told her? Did he need to remind her that she shouldn’t be telling anyone, anything?

He checked the tracker again. She was entering the school grounds through the front gate. While he was watching her walk, his phone buzzed in his hand, and a notification appeared at the top of his screen. It was a text from Kasuga-san to a group chat he had just been added to.

Kasuga💧: Haruka-chan is on site. She acted normal and appears unharmed.

Everyone responded with various emojis or words of relief.

Me: Great! I’ll let you know when she enters homeroom.

He ran, ready to greet his angel for the first time that morning, as far as everyone was aware. Not long after he arrived, she appeared.

“Sawamura-san, good morning.”

“Good morning, sensei.”

Me: She’s here, safe and sound.

Footsteps barreled down the hallway, and four faces showed at the entrance to his classroom. Majima-san, Nishikiyama-san, Dojima-sensei, and Date-san. After Haruka-chan sat down, she looked up and met their gazes.

“What are you all doing here?” she asked.

“What the fuck do you mea—!?”

“Majima-no-aniki,” Dojima-sensei scolded. Majima-san bit his tongue. Date-san beckoned her over, and she rolled her eyes before standing, artificially adding weight and difficulty to each movement.

“What?”

“‘What’!? That’s all you fucking have to say for yourself!? ‘What’!?” Majima-san shouted. Haruka-chan stared, seemingly bored. Akiyama pinched the bridge of his nose.

“Please take this outside,” he said.

“You don’t seem as worried as the rest of us,” Majima-san responded.

“I’m just hiding it better, that’s all.”

“Uh-huh.”

“Majima-san!” Haruka-chan said. Everyone looked her way. “I’m fine! See?” she said, raising her arms to present herself. “I was staying with Akari-chan, ok?” She quickly glanced back at her friend, who was watching the entire exchange. She nodded and gave her a thumbs up.

“Why didn’t ya fucking tell anyone!?”

“My phone died!”

“And ya snuck in at night to steal your fucking clothes and bag!?”

“I was still mad at Ojisan! I didn’t want to talk to him yet and say something I might regret later!” Everyone responded with various levels of exasperation.

“Well, we all know she’s safe now, that’s what matters,” Dojima-sensei said. “Let’s leave her be.” One by one, the men left, Majima-san lingering longer than the others before walking away. Haruka-chan turned around to all of her classmates staring at her. She said nothing and returned to her desk.

Chapter Text

Majima: haruka-chan is safe, kiryu-chan

Majima: she showed up to school

Me: Thank you .  Im so relieved .

Kiryu was finally able to breathe for the first time since Haruka first disappeared the night before. All of his friends went out looking for her or reaching out to her or asking people if they had seen her. He should probably get her friends’ numbers, just in case.

“Everything fine?” Seonhee asked. She was lounging on the couch, snacking on dried octopus.

“Yeah. Yeah, everything’s fine now,” he said and sighed with a small smile. “Everything’s fine.” He received more messages from everyone, telling him she was at school. Safe. Alive. He then texted his boss, letting him know he was on his way to work. “I’m going to work now,” he said, standing with a groan. “Think you can hold down the fort?”

“Not much else I can do.”

“I suppose. Well, reach out if you need anything.”

“I don’t have your number,” she said, pulling out her phone. He told her his number, and his phone buzzed.

Unknown number : Seonhee 🕷️🕸️💖

Kiryu blushed only a little, and she winked at him.

“Alright, I’ll be home later.” She stood up from the couch and followed him to the front door.

“Have a good day,” she said, leaning against the wall as he put his shoes on.

“Thanks.” He left without another word.

As he walked to the taxi garage, Kiryu once again replayed the fight he had with Haruka in his mind. Though at that point, he had replayed it so many times that half of the little details might not be accurate anymore.

Haruka wasn’t wrong, though. She didn’t ask for this life. She was even the one to suggest not bringing in any more orphans after the first one, Shiro, was adopted.

“For budgeting reasons,” she had told him. “Supporting eight kids was a bit difficult. Seven will be easier.”

It was perfectly sound logic, and Kiryu didn’t sense any ulterior motives from her. But he was always so bad at reading people and was so willing to take them at face value. And she was so good at twisting and bending the truth while seamlessly weaving in lies. And he still always trusted her.

After the next two kids, Izumi and Koji, were adopted, he brought up the idea of bringing in more orphans again. Now there were only five kids, they’d manage with one or two more again. That was when she finally told him the truth.

“Ojisan. I don’t think we should bring in anymore orphans.”

“Why?”

“It’s not safe for them.”

“What do you mean? We’re more than able to provide them with food and clothes and—”

“And a life laced with crime?” He paused. “Think about it, Ojisan. Morning Glory has more than once been stormed by yakuza. Remember when Mine-san bulldozed the place?”

“But he atoned for that after he and Daigo started—"

“And the Ryudo family is more than willing to take advantage of your generosity—”

“It’s not like they—”

“They’d leave us alone altogether if they actually wanted you to live a civilian life. It’s not fair to the kids if stuff keeps happening.”

A month later, more disgruntled ex-Tojo members found Morning Glory and took the kids hostage. The standoff lasted hours, and many of the kids suffered from the experience long after it ended. Kiryu was more receptive to Haruka’s idea after that.

In all honesty, he had forgotten how bad it could get at times. Haruka needed to remind him on multiple occasions that his life experiences weren’t universal, that most kids didn’t grow up in an orphanage, most kids weren’t raised by a high-ranking yakuza who killed their real parents, most kids didn’t dream of joining the yakuza, most kids didn’t drop out of high school to pursue a life of crime.

Once the final child, Mitsuo, was adopted, they closed down Morning Glory. They never discussed opening another orphanage. But Kiryu would love to do that again, and he had a feeling Haruka would, too.

‘He trusted Saejima, too,’ she had said the night before. That shattered Kiryu. For a moment, he didn’t believe she had actually said that. That she said his name. That she brought up that incident at all.

And, really, wasn’t it partly his fault? If he were never yakuza, he would’ve contacted the police after finding an unconscious man wearing prison clothes and with a giant tiger tattoo on his back washed ashore across the road from Morning Glory. But, instead, he took the man in, patched him up, prepared clothes and food, and left him alone with Haruka.

What a fucking idiot.

That first night that Haruka told him what happened, he didn’t want to believe it. But Haruka wasn’t the type to lie about that sort of thing. She was the kind of girl who would have hidden it forever. If he had interrupted her that night when she told him, he would never have heard it.

‘I won’t let anyone do anything to you ever again,’ he had shouted the night he caught her and his friend Akiyama-san almost kiss, back when he was crashing at their place after he and Hana had a fight. As if promising something like that actually meant anything or changed anything.

Did she resent him? Resent him for putting her in such a vulnerable position? Resent him for not being able to do anything, both back then and when she was drinking? Did she resent Majima-no-nii-san for trusting that man? Did she resent the school for employing him? How did she continue living carrying all of this?

Well, she almost didn’t, in fact.

Suddenly, Kiryu was at work. He would have to put all of those thoughts to rest for now.

“Ah, Kiryu-san! Good morning!”

“Hey, Nakajima-san. Thank you for letting me come in late.” His boss, Nakajima-san, walked toward him and lowered his voice.

“Of course, Kiryu-san. I’m glad your daughter is ok.” Kiryu nodded. Despite everything, he was still uncomfortable using his boss’ kindness and trust in him. The man was more than willing to let him stay at the hospital for as long as he needed and never pushed him to take extra shifts to make up for it. And even now, he was happy to let Kiryu prioritize his family over his work. Not many people can say that about their boss.

“Alright, where am I driving to?”

☆☆☆

Like usual, Kiryu walked straight home after work. His colleagues, by now, understood not to bother inviting him out for beers after their shift ended, and he wasn’t offended that they stopped. 

When he entered his apartment, he was greeted by the largest mess he had ever seen.

“Oh my god, what happened in here!?”

“Kiryu-san! Welcome home!” Seonhee called out as she got up from the couch.

“Did a wild beast run loose in here or something!?”

“What do you mean?” she asked, looking around at the trash, clothes, cigarette butts, and everything else.

“We don’t even have this much stuff in the apartment!” Kiryu said, bewildered. Seonhee shrugged and returned to the couch.

“What’s for dinner?”

“Uh, I don’t know. Haruka usually makes it, but…”

“Can you cook, Kiryu-san?”

“Not really. Can you?”

“Not really. And I can’t leave the apartment, either.” Kiryu sighed.

“Fine, I’ll go buy some bento boxes or something.”

“Here,” Seonhee said, digging in her cleavage. Kiryu blushed and turned away to protect her modesty. She walked up to him and passed him a ¥5,000 bill between her pointer and middle finger. “Get yourself something nice,” she said with a wink.

“No, it’s fine, I can—”

“Ugh, just take it,” she said, grabbing his hand and shoving the bill into his palm. Having not even taken his shoes off, Kiryu stepped right back outside.

Me: Im going to the grocery store to get dinner .  Do you want me to pick anything up for you ?

He didn’t get a response until he was already back home.

Haruka: im wit akari chan

Haruka: hav diner without me

Me: When are you coming home ?

He didn’t get another response for almost an hour.

Haruka: idk

Haruka: not 2nite

He sighed again.

“She staying at her friend’s place again?” Seonhee asked.

“Hm? Yeah, she is.” He stood with a groan. “I’m going to run a bath. You want to take one, too?”

“Yeah, but I’ll go in after you.”

“You sure? The water will be warmer—”

“Hot water isn’t good for my skin.”

“Uh, ok.”

Sinking in the tub still wasn’t easy. It was where they found her. Where Haruka…

Those days, while she was in a coma in the ICU, were the worst in his life. Worse than the day he lost Kazama, worse than the day he lost his parents, worse than the day of the Jingweon massacre.

Was it worse than the day he lost Yumi? In a sense, he was about to lose Yumi all over again. Haruka looked so much like her. Especially her eyes. He was so struck by how similarly she looked. Haruka was growing up, and it was like he was watching Yumi grow up again.

Those days blended together, and he swayed in and out of sleep to the point that he wasn’t even sure what planet he was on. When they finally moved her from the ICU, he cried. He didn’t care that the nurses could see him. Maybe the tears were why they let him request moving her to a private room.

He surprised himself at how well he acted when she finally woke up. He had run out of tears and had plenty of time to prepare. He was just so happy. Nothing in the world mattered except for the fact that he could talk to her again.

But even after everything, he couldn’t bring himself to be overbearing, to control every aspect of her life to protect her. After everything, he still trusted her to take care of herself. And if she didn’t, he would be there to catch her. Maybe it wasn’t enough, but it felt wrong to try to do anything more.

The water was still warm when Kiryu stepped out of the tub, and he rushed to dry off so Seonhee could enjoy a warm bath, too. Having never been in the habit while living with Haruka, he had forgotten to bring a change of clothes with him.

Towel wrapped around his waist, he stepped out of the bathroom.

“Seonhee, the bath is free.” She sat up on the couch to face him and could not hide her eyes darting over his entire body. He felt himself turn red—must be from the hot water, he was still recovering from that, that’s all. Once Seonhee finally noticed what she was doing, she stood, coughed, thanked him, and entered the bathroom with her head down.

After she shut the door, Kiryu called in, “You’re not grabbing a towel or anything?”

She walked right back out, still not looking at him, dug around in her bag, grabbed what she needed, and walked right back into the bathroom.

☆☆☆

“Seonhee, are you sure you’re ok with sleeping on the couch?” Kiryu was sitting by the little table in the living room, watching some sci-fi anime from the 80s, while Seonhee lounged on the couch behind him. Seonhee had only been there one night so far.

“It’s fine, Kiryu-san,” she said with genuine reassurance.

“I can see if I have a spare futon, there’s probably one hiding in the back of the closet,” he said, starting to stand.

“No, really, it’s fine,” she said with a laugh. Kiryu ignored her and walked to the bedroom. As he opened the closet on his side of the divider, he heard Seonhee follow, stopping in the doorway. He got down on his hands and knees, dragging out old bins and pushing various knick-knacks aside.

“It’s gotta be in here somewhere,” he strained out. He finally felt the foam and cotton of a rolled-up futon and dragged it out before standing and shaking it out. “It’s a little musty, I can wash it—”

“Kiryu-san, please, don’t worry about me!”

“It’s not right for a lady to sleep on the couch—”

“If you insist,” she said, pulling out her phone to make a call. After the person on the other end answered, she talked about the sound a chickadee makes when a cat approaches. “Han is sending a new futon up. Should be here in half an hour.” Kiryu just stared at her, bewildered. “The Geomijul has been using this code for over a decade, it’s become quite an extensive language in its own right.”

“Huh.”

“Anyway, you can put that away,” she said, gesturing to the futon Kiryu was still holding.

“Actually, I want to change things up a little,” he said and carried it to the washing machine.

“Do you need help?”

“I know how to read the little symbols on the tag,” he said, turning the futon around and around until he found the little white tag on one edge. He stared at it for a moment, pushed some buttons on the washing machine, started the water, added the detergent, threw the futon in, and shut the lid.

“I’m impressed. A man who can use a washing machine.”

“Any man who refuses to learn such a basic task is still but a boy.”

“Well, fair enough,” she said, still impressed.

“It’ll still have to dry overnight, so I guess I’ll use my regular futon tonight—”

“Or you could use the new one I’m getting, and I can use yours!”

“What? Why? That’s not hygienic.”

“You deserve a nice new futon! You’re the Dragon of Dojima! The legendary Fourth Chairman of the Tojo Clan!”

“I’m just Kiryu. You’re using your new futon, that’s final.”

Chapter Text

Sunday, 11 January 2015

Haruka-chan had brought enough clothes to stay with Akiyama for a few days, and she was down to her last set of clean clothes.

“You can just wash your clothes here,” he offered. “Or I’ll buy you a whole new wardrobe, I don’t care.”

“Are you sure? I feel like I’m overstaying my welcome…”

“What could possibly make you think that?”

“I mean, you’ve been having to buy me food—”

“Which we then cook together for us both to eat.”

“And you’ve been having to drive me to and from school—”

“I’d be driving anyway.”

“And I’m taking up space in your bed—”

“That bed is one of the largest on the market, you’re not. In fact, I want you taking up space in my bed.”

“And…” she trailed off, wrapped herself in her arms, and looked away.

“Is it because you’ve been waking up in the night?” She simply nodded.

Except for that first night that Haruka-chan stayed over, when neither of them got any sleep, she had woken up screaming every night. And he would turn right over to her and wake her up, faster than Kiryu-san ever could. He would turn on her bedside lamp and force her to see that she was on his bed, not that piece of floorboard in Okinawa. That the person touching her was him, not that man. That the weight she was feeling on her was the blanket, not that man. He would look her in the eyes, in her tear-stained eyes, and console and reassure her over and over again that she was safe, that she was ok.

The fact that it had happened three nights in a row was frustrating to both of them, though. To him, simply because he was getting woken up by the desperate, terrified screams of the woman that he loved, and it was tiring him out. He couldn’t imagine her and Kiryu-san living with this for over a year.

No wonder she drank every night if it stopped this from happening.

The second night she stayed over, as she slept in his bed, he crept into the kitchen and grabbed all of his bottles of alcohol. He knew she would search for them sooner rather than later and needed to get ahead of the curve. If she never saw them, she would be less likely to want them, to think about them. He stashed them in the cabinet above the fridge, where she wasn’t even able to reach, and hid them behind a couple of appliances he had only used once for good measure.

“Is your medication not working anymore?” he asked her.

“I… left it at home.” Akiyama tried not to sigh too heavily.

“Well, that’s not making it easier for us, now, is it?” She shook her head no. “Do you intend on going back to your apartment and getting it?”

“What else can I do?”

“Will you be getting another refill soon? We can just go pick that up.”

Minutes later, they were already in Akiyama’s car, driving to her local drugstore. 

After several minutes of silence, she said, “Thank you, Shu-chan,” while staring out the passenger window.

“For what?” he asked with a smile, glancing over at her.

“For everything.” He placed his hand on her thigh and rubbed it tenderly. There was only care and reassurance in his touch. “I probably should still go back home soon.” Akiyama’s hand froze by her knee.

“Don’t force yourself. Have you been keeping in touch with Kiryu-san?”

“Not really, but I know Majima-san is keeping him in the loop. It’d be more difficult if I weren’t going to school or if none of Ojisan’s friends were part of the staff.”

“Does he reach out to you at all?”

“No, but that doesn’t surprise me. He’s all about giving me space and not intruding on me or anything.” Akiyama knew that all too well; maybe if Kiryu-san were more proactive, Haruka-chan’s addiction wouldn’t have gotten so bad.

No, I shouldn’t think that. But if I were a father…

He looked over at Haruka-chan again.

“Do you know if that underground leader guy is still staying with your dad?”

“Nope. And I don’t want to ask him, either.”

“Why not?”

“I don’t know. I don’t want him to know that if that person leaves, I’ll come home.”

“...why not?”

“That gives him too much power.” Akiyama couldn’t follow the logic completely, but didn’t want to argue further. If he left the conversation there, she’d be more willing to keep staying with him. In his sight at all times.

They pulled into the parking lot of the drugstore, and Haruka-chan didn’t immediately get up to go inside after he shut the car off.

“Want me to come in with you?” he asked her.

“No, it’s ok.”

“You seem to be having a hard time even getting out of the car.” She took in a deep breath.

“I just need a second.” Akiyama got out, walked around to the passenger side, and ducked to look her in the eyes through the window with a smile. She smiled in return and even laughed a little. She sat up and opened the door, and he stepped back as the door swung open. He glanced around and, when he saw they were alone, pulled her in for a tight hug. Instead of freezing or checking their surroundings, she wrapped her arms tightly around him and rested her head on his chest. After a deep breath, she looked up at him with a soft smile. He looked down into her beautiful brown eyes and kissed her tenderly on the lips. “I love you,” she said.

“I love you, too.”

After picking up her medication, Akiyama asked her if she wanted to do anything else while they were out.

“Unless you don’t think you have the spoons for it,” he added.

“Um, I mean, I hardly get the energy to get out of the house when I’m not going to school. I guess I should take advantage of the opportunity.”

“Ok. But we have to be careful where we go. People will be more suspicious than usual if they see us out together on the weekend.”

“Right.”

“How about we do what I suggested earlier?” She raised a brow quizzically. “Let’s go shopping.”

☆☆☆

“I want you to tell me as soon as you want to take a break, ok? Don’t force yourself.” Akiyama and Haruka-chan were standing outside the IKEA in Shinjuku, staring up at the multiple stories containing all kinds of cheap minimalist furniture and fascinating stuffed animals.

“Ok,” she said weakly.

“Ready to go inside?” She took in a deep breath.

“Yeah.” He took her hand, and she quickly glanced around before holding onto him, and they walked inside.

It was Sunday, and the place was crowded, just as Akiyama feared. But this was a perfect opportunity, he couldn’t waste it. If it were just him, he would have gone somewhere much more high-end, but he had Haruka-chan in tow. At least here, the prices wouldn’t be as intimidating, and she’d be more willing to let him buy her something.

“Finally decorating your apartment, huh?” she asked.

“Yeah, you caught me.” He had completely forgotten that he had asked her to help him decorate his apartment when he had first moved in over a year ago. 

They wandered through the various displays, spaces set up to make the prospective buyer imagine living in a space filled with merchandise that was on a shelf just over there or in the warehouse downstairs. Kitchens, bathrooms, dining rooms, living rooms, everything had its own dedicated area.

There were several times when Haruka-chan would start to get overwhelmed, and he’d pull her to the side into one of the displays, away from the crowd pushing through the path that looped through. There they would stand together, and after she took some deep breaths, maybe leaned against the wall or closed her eyes, she was ready to reenter the fray.

When they got to the home office section, Akiyama slowed down. He walked over to the desks and asked if she liked any of them.

“Why?” she responded.

“Go and walk around, see if there’s any that suit you.” He finally released her hand and let her meander, watching her look at everything with a strange intensity. She inspected the positioning of shelves, the number of drawers, how high the desktop was. Finally, she returned and pointed to a few different ones, saying which one would suit which purpose better.

“...that one would probably be the best to do my homework at—”

“Perfect.” He walked straight to it and jotted down the number associated with the desk so he could pick it up in the warehouse.

“Shu-chan?”

“If you’re going to be staying with me, I want the place to be as comfortable as possible for you.” As he spoke, he turned redder and redder. “I… I want… I want you to feel like my apartment is your home.” When she didn’t respond, he finally looked at her, and she was just as red, still not looking at him. “Was that too much? Did I come on too strong?”

“You always ask me that.”

“Because I’m always the first to say something like this. At least in person between us, I guess.” He recalled her wearing white on the day she believed to be her last, her writing ‘I love you’ in her note that he had found. He was the first to suggest trying a relationship in the first place, though he had a feeling she wanted that much earlier than he did. He always thought he was the one coming on strong because she rarely told him how deep her feelings truly were. And yet.

“Do… do you want me to say how I feel more often?”

“I just don’t want you to feel ashamed to say how you feel. How you really feel.”

“I see.” She didn’t say anything else.

“Do you remember the first time we went to that park two summers ago, with all the gardens?” She looked up at him and nodded. 

“I mean, it’s when we had our first kiss, it’d be weird if I forgot.” He chuckled.

“I guess you’re right. Anyway, when we were under the rain shelter, you said you had no room to hide or not act how you wanted. Where did that go? How did I become the one who could say these things more easily than you?” He recalled the way she had acted the other night when she first ran away from home, how demanding she was, how willing she was to tell him what she wanted to do and what she wanted him to do to her. He’d love to see more of that.

“That was… that was before I…” She stopped, parsing her thoughts. “That was before I had something I was terrified to lose.”

“What do you mean?”

“I mean, with Ojisan and the orphans, that was all unconditional. There were fights, heavy words so lightly thrown at times. But our honesty with each other was necessary. I wasn’t scared that my honesty would drive them away. Same goes for anyone Ojisan interacted with. Honesty and openness was what got things accomplished. Even with friends or classmates, if they didn’t like how I acted or what I’d say, oh well, good riddance, I’d rather find people who liked that about me.”

“Well, I love that about you. You were always so much more fearless than I could ever be.”

“Things have changed.”

“In what way?”

“I… I love you so much… and I’m scared that if I get pushy or say the wrong thing, you’ll leave me behind. You're the first person that I was scared to be honest with. I think that started around the time of that first birthday date.”

“Oh, angel,” he said, pulling her in close, not even caring who saw them. “I promise you, nothing you say will drive me away. You honestly think, after everything, my commitment to you was conditional.” She tightened her grip on his shirt. “It was that fire in you that pulled me to you in the first place.” She buried her face further into his chest, and he stroked her hair. “Don’t deny it. Embrace it.” He didn’t think they’d have this kind of revelation in the middle of the home office section at IKEA, but that made this all the more meaningful. “We can talk about it more in the car if you want,” he said softly into her ear.

“When did you first fall in love with me?” she asked, surprising him. He blushed.

“Uh… um… well…” She had put him on the spot. And now he was scared to answer, despite the conversation they had just had. She laughed into him.

“We can talk about it in the car.”

☆☆☆

Near the end of the displays, there were shelves upon shelves of various knick-knacks, lights, rugs, decorations, fake paintings, and even potted plants. As they entered, Akiyama grabbed a cart, looked down at her, and simply said, “Go nuts.”

After the conversation they had earlier, he still wasn’t sure if she would take the opportunity to test him, or if she would continue to let her fear grip her.

She looked up at him, scanned the displays, then looked back at him one more time. He nodded with a smile, and she walked forward, directly to a giant plush shark. He was a little surprised, but his happiness overtook that.

The thing was comically large, and she had to hug the beast with both arms to carry it. When she returned, her eyes had that determined passion she had when asking to go to the arcade back in Sotenbori. Before all of that happened.

“You want that?” he asked with a smile. She nodded vigorously, her ponytail bouncing. “Alright, throw it in,” he said, gesturing to the cart he was pushing. They walked slowly beside each other, and every now and then Haruka-chan would suddenly leave his side to inspect something, and occasionally just place it in the cart without looking at him. He knew how hard it was for her to buy even one thing for herself. But if convincing her that it was for his place and he wanted her opinion was what it took, then fine.

And if his place felt more like home to her, he’d feel less guilty about forcing her to stay there if it came down to it.

He was still terrified about those cameras disappearing. When he snuck into Haruka-chan’s bedroom, he overheard a woman say that they learned something about the cameras. What had they found out? He had been careful and bought the cameras as a guest with a fake email and fake name attached, and the website said they removed all information related to any purchase, but who knew what they had discovered anyway?

Really, he was surprised that so many days had passed without someone knocking on his apartment door with an arrest warrant. He just hoped it would stay that way.

☆☆☆

“I hear the Swedish meatballs are pretty good,” Akiyama told her as they were checking out. “Want some lunch while we’re here?”

After dropping off the newly purchased goods in his car, they walked through the cafeteria, trays in hand, and grabbed pieces of food off the shelves. They found a little table far away from the rest of the crowd to eat at, but Haruka-chan didn’t start eating.

“How you feeling? I know that was a lot for you to do today,” he said. She shrugged.

“Not looking forward to putting that desk together.”

“We don’t have to do it today. Or I’m fine putting it together by myself.”

“But you bought it for me.”

“And I’ll build it for you, too. Hell, want me to paint it while I’m at it?” She laughed. “I’m serious.”

“No, that’s ok. Thank you, though,” she said with a smile, and picked up her fork.

☆☆☆

Haruka-chan did end up helping with building the desk, but mostly by providing instruction or helping him hold something up while he screwed things together. The sun had long set by the time they were finished for the day, and she lay down on the floor next to the desk.

“You tired?” he asked.

“Yeah,” she said with a heavy sigh.

“I can make dinner by myself tonight.”

“No, it’s ok, I just need to lie down and recharge.”

“Ok. Let me know what I can do to help, though.”

“Ok.”

“You plan on being down there long?” She shrugged, and he lay down on the floor beside her.

“What are you doing?” she asked.

“I can’t just leave you alone to wallow on the floor.” He pulled out his phone. “Want to watch a funny video or something?” She scooted up next to him, and he wrapped an arm around her as she rested her head on his chest. He kissed her forehead, and she looked up at him with a smile.

“I love you.”

“I love you, too.”

Monday, 12 January 2015

“We finally have something,” Han said after entering Kiryu’s apartment.

“That took a while, I thought your boys were fast,” Majima said from the little table.

“And our opponent was faster. Remember what I was saying about that company that sold those cameras? How they’re used by governments and corporations? They don’t get that clientele with lax security.” 

“I knew you’d be able to do it, Han,” Seonhee said. Han smiled and sat beside her at the little table.

“So, the company still keeps a database of which serial number is associated with which purchase to use as blackmail or as information to sell to the right buyer. Of course, this part of their operation is a well-kept secret, otherwise, people would be less willing to buy from them to begin with. Their website claims they remove any information related to a purchase every 24 hours, which they technically do. But instead of deleting the information and wiping it from their database, they just move that information to an internal, local server that’s separated from the internet through a USB stick. It’s called an air-gap. But nothing is 100% secure. 

“Using tech that hasn’t even been published yet, we figured out how to exfiltrate the information via GSMem, a malware that can exfiltrate data through an air-gap over cellular frequencies. Rogue software on an infected target computer modulates and transmits electromagnetic signals at cellular frequencies by invoking specific memory-related instructions and utilizing the multichannel memory architecture to amplify the transmission. Furthermore, the transmitted signals can be received and demodulated by a rootkit placed in the baseband firmware of a nearby cellular phone.

“All we had to do was a USB drop attack nearby. Scatter enough USBs with our malware, and some idiot is bound to pick it up and plug it into a computer. The CIA used that very method a few years ago to infiltrate Iran’s nuclear program.”

“The CIA?” Majima asked. He looked away, deep in thought.

“Oh, those centrifuges in that powerplant?” Kiryu asked.

“The very same.”

“So, I take it someone took the bait,” Kiryu continued.

“Exactly. It took a few days, but we got there. We have the information that connects the IP address to the serial number. And they’re just outside of Kamurocho.”

“That simplifies things. Do you have any more specific information?”

“I do. It’s from a residential apartment complex. I have the address, including the apartment number. And the name of the resident of said apartment.”

“So? Who is it?”

Chapter Text

While Akiyama was making dinner and Haruka-chan was resting on his recliner, there was a knock on the door. Loud, insistent, impatient bangs echoed through the apartment. Terrified that it was another gift from Majima-san, if not Majima-san himself, he ran to Haruka-chan.

“Go hide in our bedroom.”

“What? Why?”

“Just do it.” When she moved too slowly for his liking, he picked her up from the recliner, jogged to the bedroom, and set her back down. “I’ll explain later. Please, just stay hidden.”

“Shu-chan, what’s going—” He shut the door and blocked it with a chair. He ran to the front door, the banging still going, and looked through the peephole. His breath caught.

“Ya can’t hide forever, Aki-chan! I see your car in the lot downstairs,” Majima-san called.

What do I do what do I do what do I do what do I do what do I do!?

“Maybe he’s not home. He could’ve walked anywhere,” Kiryu-san said to him.

fuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuck

“Well, I ain’t leavin’ til I see that fucker and beat the lights outta ‘im!” And he believed it, the guy had an aluminum bat slung over his shoulder.

“That could be hours from now for all we know.”

“Then I’ll wait for those hours!”

Akiyama grabbed his and Haruka-chan’s shoes and coats from the entryway and ran back to the bedroom.

“Akiyama Shun, don’t you dare lock me—!”

“We have to leave. Now.”

“What? Why?” He was already throwing essentials into a duffle bag.

“Someone’s after me. A rival moneylender.” He had to pat himself on the back for coming up with that lie so quickly. “I can’t have you in the crossfire.” Haruka-chan ran to the en suite bathroom and gathered everything in a ziplock bag as Akiyama shoved as much stuff as possible into his duffle bag. While she wasn’t watching, he grabbed all of her belongings, too—her uniform, her school bag, her phones.

He ran to the bathroom and observed what she had packed. He didn’t expect her to pack any of her items; no way she was anticipating running away with him. After she exited, he did his own sweep through the bathroom—if she left her toiletries or medication behind, it would all be over. He hid everything he could find in his pockets—her toothbrush, her medication, even her shampoo.

Once they were all packed, he opened the window, dropped the bag out, and helped her climb out before following suit.

I’m really getting sick of escaping through windows…

“My car’s out front. We can’t take it. We’ll just have to hoof it,” Akiyama said softly before leading her down the stairs on the opposite side of the building, and jogged down the road.

“Let me run home to Ojisan, he can help—”

“NO! No, uh, didn’t you want him to not get involved in any of this stuff anymore?”

“But you’re in danger!”

“I’ll be ok, I have contingency plans in place.”

“If you say so.”

They didn’t stop until they reached Shinjuku Station.

“Please, stay safe, call me when you can—”

“You’re coming with me,” he cut her off.

“Huh?” He grabbed her hand and dragged her to the platform for the bullet train. “Akiyama-san! What are you doing!?”

“I told you! I’m taking you with me!”

“Why!?”

“I need you!” She didn’t respond, and he looked behind him at her. She was stunned but continued to run with him.

They reached the platform for the bullet train, and Akiyama did not stop surveying his surroundings as he bought their tickets and waited for the train to arrive.

“You think they know we’re here?”

“I have no idea what they know or don’t know. Kiryu-san still thinks you’re staying with your friend, right?”

“Yeah, but—” 

“Good, good, make sure that doesn’t change—”

“But what happens if I don’t show up to school tomorrow!? If both of us don’t show up to school tomorrow!?”

“I don’t know! Come up with a lie, you’re great at that!”

“Ok, ok, uh, I could tell them I’m staying home with a cold or something… You could say one of your parents suddenly went to the emergency room, and you went to see them?”

“My parents are dead.”

“Oh, yeah, right… Uh…”

“The train’s here, you’ve plenty of time to think.”

Over the speaker, the announcer said, “Shinkansen to Sotenbori. Shinkansen to Sotenbori. Please mind the gap between the train and the platform.”

“Wait, Sotenbori!?” Haruka-chan shouted.

“We have to get out of Tokyo. Come on,” he said, dragging her onto the train. She dug her heels into the ground, but he was much stronger than her.

“I can’t just drop everything and leave!”

“You sure can. We already are.” He found their seats, sat her down in the window seat, and sat beside her, blocking her only escape route.

“What about Ojisan!? And school!? How long are we even going to be down there!?”

“As long as possible. Now keep your voice down, I don’t want people to think I’m a kidnapper or something.” She stared at him.

“What’s going on?”

“I already told you.”

“You’re lying.”

“No, I’m not.”

“You’re not as bad a liar as Ojisan, but I can still see right through you.”

“Well, your radar isn’t 100% accurate, ‘cause I’m not lying.” She narrowed her eyes but didn’t say anything more.

The train ride was dreadfully silent between them for over an hour.

“You come up with any reasons I can give the school for why I didn’t show?” he asked her.

“You can just also say you’re sick.”

“I need something better than that.”

“Come up with it yourself.”

“Are you mad at me?”

“Yes, Akiyama-san, I’m mad at you!”

Another 45 minutes of silence.

“You could say you had plumbing issues and had to stay home for the plumber,” Haruka-chan offered.

“That’ll work for a day.”

“Do you think you’ll be down there more than a day?”

“We will be down there until everything blows over.”

“How long will that be?”

“I don’t know.”

“Can you at least give me an estimate?”

“More than a week, that’s for sure.”

“What!?” He tried to shush her. “Can’t you just beat them up or something!? You get in street fights all the time, right!?”

“I can’t kick away a bullet.” Haruka-chan huffed.

“And what makes you think I won’t just turn around and leave? I’m not the one being hunted. If anything, you’re putting me more in harm's way.”

“I can’t let you out of my sight.”

“What?” She watched him, eyes darting all over his face. He tried to keep his face neutral. “Oh my god, do you still think I’ll try to off myself the first chance I get!?”

“I can’t risk it.”

“I’m not feeling like that anymore!”

“There’s no way I can know that for sure. You were in the hospital only a month ago. And you lie all the goddamn time.”

“What are you talking about!?”

“I don’t want to do this right now.”

“You started this!”

“And I’m ending it!”

Another 30 minutes of silence.

“This is all because I love you, you know,” he said.

Another 20 minutes of silence.

“I’m hungry,” she said.

“Oh, yeah, we didn’t actually eat dinner. I can get us something from the food cart.”

“...please.”

After eating, there was still over an hour to go on the train.

“Where are we even gonna stay?” she asked him.

“We’ll figure something out. It’s January, plenty of places will have vacancies.” She nodded.

Don’t they check ID when checking in, though? Love hotels don’t do that, but I’m pretty sure all the regular ones do, unless I find some cheap dingy place that’ll look the other way. Even then, an older man checking into a cheap motel late at night with an 18-year-old would still raise eyebrows. She’s still not an adult according to the law. Fuck.

It was then that it hit him what he was doing, what he had done. He leaned forward, grabbing his hair in both fists, breaths shallowing.

“Fuck. Fuck. Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck,” he desperately squeaked.

“Shu-chan?”

“Oh my god. Ohmygod ohmygod ohmygod ohmygod ohmygod ohmygod ohmygod ohmygod ohmygod,” he said more loudly, voice cracking.

“Hey, it’s going to be ok,” Haruka-chan said, rubbing his back soothingly. He suppressed a scream. “Do… you want to try some breathing exercises? I know it helps me when I’m anxious.” Haruka-chan guided him through, counting their breaths. After a few minutes, he calmed down enough that he didn’t think his head was about to explode.

When he was clear-headed enough, Akiyama pulled out his phone and started searching for a place to stay. 

“I forgot my phones at your place!” she exclaimed.

“Oh? That complicates things. How will you be able to reach out to your friend that you’re sick?”

“I don’t fucking know!” she said, annoyed.

“We’ll figure something out. If nothing else, she’ll probably just lie for you without you even asking.” 

He visited one of those aggregate websites that list a bunch of hotels and motels, typed ‘Sotenbori’ in the search bar, and sorted by lowest rated. Those places would be the safest for them.

The sun had set hours ago when they finally arrived at Sotenbori. Akiyama excused himself to the bathroom and pulled out his phone and Haruka-chan’s phones from his pocket. Knowing how easy it would be for them to be tracked if they kept them with them, he turned them all off.

They took a taxi to the motel. Just as Akiyama expected, all he had to do was pay with more cash than the room was worth, and no one asked for ID. Really, there were probably plenty of people who came through doing a multitude of unsavory activities. All he was doing was protecting the one he loved.

“This place is disgusting,” Haruka-chan said as soon as they walked into their room. And she wasn’t wrong. The ceiling light didn’t work, there was a stain on the mattress, the shower curtain needed replacing, and Akiyama swore he could see two handprints above the bedframe. He gagged at the thought of walking through with a black light.

“It’ll have to do. I can’t have us getting tracked back here.”

“Hmm.”

“Come on, let’s just get ready for bed.”

In the middle of the night, when he knew she was asleep, Akiyama crept out of the room, shutting the door so slowly that not even the latch made a sound. He jogged to the river that flowed through the city just a few blocks away and hurled all three of their phones into the water. No one would be able to find them now.

☆☆☆

Majima stayed sitting in front of Aki-chan’s apartment until it was almost midnight. The guy never showed, lights never turned on, he didn’t hear shit from inside the place. He had had enough and kicked the door in.

“Aki-chan! I know you’re in here! Come on out!” He crept through the place, looking for any signs of life, listening for any movement. He entered the kitchen and saw a frying pan with half-made food still in it. The TV was still on, though muted. He continued to tiptoe through the apartment until he reached the bedroom door, which was locked. Hand on the doorknob, he grinned. “Found you, motherfucker.” He kicked the door in and held up his bat, ready to whack the guy on sight. The room was freezing, the window wide open, the curtains billowing in the wind. Majima threw his bat to the floor. “Fuck!”

Tuesday, 13 January 2015

“Florist! I’m cashin’ in that favor!” Majima called as he ran through the double doors of The Florist’s office. He wasn't surprised the man was still awake, he likely would be for a few hours more.

“That’s alright, Majima-san, I already know why you’re here—”

“Then tell me!”

“I’ll give it to you for free. Look at this.” The Florist pulled up a tablet and showed the screen to Majima. Videos of that fucking guy running through the streets several hours ago. And he wasn’t alone.

“Haruka-chan!?”

“You think they’re eloping?”

“Don’t joke about that, fuckface,” Majima said, grabbing his collar while still keeping his eye on the screen. The camera kept changing to follow the fugitives to Shinjuku Station. “Ain’t that outside your little bubble?”

“Shinjuku Station is a valuable location to keep tabs on.” Majima squinted his eye, reading the signs and displays that they ran past.

“Sotenbori!?”

“Yep. They probably arrived there an hour ago or so now.”

“Dammit!” Majima ran back towards the double doors.

“You’re welcome!” The Florist called out. Majima raised his hand by way of thanking him, not once looking back.

☆☆☆

“Kiryu-chan! Kiryu-chan! Ki-ri-yu-cha-n!”

Kiryu jolted awake to the sound of banging echoing through the apartment and shouting coming from outside. He checked the time—it was past midnight. He stood, walked to the bedroom door, and glanced at Haruka’s still-empty futon on the other side of the divider. And at Seonhee, who had her futon rolled out near it. She was sitting upright, staring right at him, her hair up in a bonnet, wearing a much too revealing tank top to sleep in. Not like he could talk, he always slept shirtless.

“Is that Majima-san?” she asked. Kiryu sighed.

“Must be.”

“You think he got your guy? The one who set up all the cameras?”

“No, I don’t think so. That’s probably why he’s here.” Kiryu continued walking, and Seonhee followed. 

“I’m gonna break down this fucking door if— Kiryu-chan,” Majima suddenly quieted as Kiryu opened the door.

“Majima-no-nii-san, what is it?” Majima-no-nii-san grasped him by the shoulders.

“It’s Haruka-chan! He took Haruka-chan!” Kiryu’s eyes widened.

“What?” His throat started to close.

“Aki-chan! He ran off to Sotenbori with her!”

“Wha… How do you…”

“The fuckin’ Florist told me! Come on! We gotta go!”

“The trains aren’t running at this time of night,” Seonhee interjected. “And driving there will take over 6 hours.”

“Ain’t ya got connections or somethin'!?”

“Not out there. Ijincho is still technically in the Tokyo area. Sotenbori is out in Osaka.”

“Fuck! What are we gonna do!?”

Kiryu hadn’t moved, had hardly breathed. “We gotta go after them. I’ll go borrow a taxi—”

“No need, Kiryu-san, I’ll get Han to come here with a rental,” Seonhee said, pulling out her phone.

“How long will that fuckin’ take!?” Majima-no-sii-san shouted.

“Less time than Kiryu-san trying to borrow a taxi from his work in the middle of the night,” she continued, and responded to Han after he answered on the other end.

“It’ll be fastest to fly there!” He pulled out his own phone and started making a phone call.

“We don’t have—” Kiryu started to protest.

“Daigo-chan! Does Mine-chan still have his jet!?... Yeah, his private jet!... I need to borrow it, Haruka-chan’s in danger!... Yeah, Aki-chan took her to Sotenbori!... Can you come pick us up? There’s gonna be four of us… Great, thanks!” He hung up. “We have a ride.”

Chapter Text

“Why would Akiyama-san take Haruka-chan to Sotenbori?” Daigo pondered. He was sitting in the front passenger seat, everyone else—Kiryu, Majima-no-nii-san, Seonhee, and Han, who had driven to Kiryu’s apartment to meet them—was loaded in the back seats of the large SUV, traveling to Mine Yoshitaka’s private airway.

“That’s what we’re trying to figure out…” Kiryu responded.

While the four waited for Daigo to pick them up, they discussed how much they would tell him about the situation. He was Akiyama-san’s boss, after all. This certainly wouldn’t make his yearly report very glowing. Ultimately, they decided not to disclose anything more than Majima told him over the phone. They were still in the dark themselves about a lot of it, they didn’t want to add to the confusion. No one told him about the cameras.

“Especially considering the rumors that traveled around the school a few months back…” Daigo continued.

“Rumors?” Kiryu asked.

“No one told you?” Daigo turned in his seat to look at Kiryu.

“What rumors?” Majima-no-nii-san and Daigo exchanged glances. “What rumors?” he asked sharply.

“Well, uh, hm,” Daigo sighed, puffing his cheeks. “Near the start of the school year, there was that incident with the water buckets. Do you remember it?” Kiryu nodded. Of course he remembered. Whatever happened to Haruka that day made her nightmares return. “Well, uh, that made many of her fellow classmates, and some of the staff, spread rumors that those two, Haruka-chan and Akiyama-san, I mean, were in a relationship.”

“What!?” Kiryu shot forward in his seat, the seatbelt buckle locking from the sudden speed.