Archive of Our Own ^beta

Stan was sitting in the corner of the living room sobbing his eyes out. He had gotten into a really bad argument with Fiddleford about the portal, which led to him storming off.

At first he thought. Screw him, I don’t need him. Besides, he'll be back anyways! In five minutes tops!

Five minutes turned into thirty, thirty turned into an hour, an hour turned into days.

He hadn’t seen Fiddleford in three days. He was worried, terrified that he messed everything up like usual. And now he was crying in the corner of the shack. He couldn’t do this, he couldn’t be alone again. Not when he finally had something good in his life. Sure it was small, but it was at least something. Something he never had within the ten years he was alone. A companion, someone who actually cared about him and didn’t see him as a simple one night stand or sex toy that they could discard once they were done with. Someone actually cared about him, and he might’ve just lost him for good.

He heard the door open, but he didn’t register it. He just kept crying, he felt like there was nothing else he could do.

Stop it. Stop crying, remember what pa said. Real men don’t cry. Real men don’t show weakness.

Then again, would his pa even consider him a real man after everything that had happened? After everything he did to survive? After falling in love with a man?

It was all too much. This was all too much. But he couldn’t stop thinking.

“Stanley?”

Stan froze and slowly looked up to find Fiddleford standing in front of him. Staring down at him, worry etched all over his face.

Stan lunged forward and gripped Fiddleford’s legs, burying his face into his stomach.

Fiddleford stared down at him. “Hey, hey it’s okay. What’s wrong, sugar?”

Stan didn’t know how to answer that. He didn’t want to answer it. Because that would make him weak right?

He felt Fiddleford move to sit on the ground with him, taking his face into his hands, as he caressed his cheek.

“What’s wrong hon?”

Stan wiped his nose. “Nothing, it’s stupid. I was just being stupid.”

Fiddleford scowled. “Stanley Pines we already went over this. You ain’t stupid, now please talk to me.”

Stan tried to force the tears to stop, but failed miserably as he explained.

“I thought I lost you Fidds. I thought I fucked everything up like usual and that I made you leave. I thought… I was gonna be alone again.”

Fiddleford stared at him, guilt in his eyes. “Oh Stanley, I’m sorry. I’m so sorry. I shouldn’t have left you, not without an explanation as to where I was going.”

Stan let out a shaky sigh. “It’s fine, what’s important is that you’re here now.”

Fiddleford shook his head. “It’s not fine. I shouldn’t have done that Stanley.”

Stan waved him off. “I’m serious, it’s okay. I’m okay, just being too overly emotional.”

Fiddleford stared at him. “Why do you do that?”

Stan frowned. “What?”

Fiddleford huffed. “Dismiss your emotions, like they don’t matter.”

“Because they don’t.”

Fiddleford looked at him. “What?”

Stan shrugged. “It’s true, they don’t matter. My pa said so.”

Fiddleford frowned. “Well he was wrong.”

Stan rolled his eyes. “Pa was never wrong. He always had a reason for the things he did, no matter how badly they hurt, he did have his reasons. And they were right.”

Fiddleford stared at him. “What do you mean by how badly they hurt?”

Stan scoffed. “Come on Fidds, you’re telling me your dad never hit you when you messed up?”

Fiddleford’s eyes widened. “What no! My dad never did anything like that neither did my mama!”

Stan frowned. “Huh, guess we had different upbringings. Oh well, now that you’re back it’s pretty late. How about we go out into town and get some food?”

Fiddleford shook his head. “Stanley! You can’t just breeze past that! Why would your dad do all of that stuff?!”

Stan crossed his arms. “Look it’s not a big deal, pa did that stuff to me whenever I messed up. Like one time when he made me stand outside in the Winter for three days straight after I got an F minus.”

Fiddleford’s eyes were wide with horror. “Stanley that’s horrible! I can’t believe he would do somethin’ like that! That’s-”

Stan waved him off. “Relax Fidds, I deserved it anyways.”

“No! No! You didn’t deserve any of that!”

Stan huffed. “Fidds you’re being dramatic-”

Fiddleford grabbed him, squeezing his shoulders. “No, you listen to me, Stanley Pines. What your father did wasn’t okay. Hell, even if it wasn’t a bad grade if it was something worse you wouldn’t have deserved that. No one deserves that. And if I ever meet him, I’ll make sure to give him a piece of my mind.”

Stan stared at the man in front of him. “Thank you, Fidds…”

Fiddleford hugged him. “Any time.”

Stan took his hand. “Let’s get dinner, yeah?”

Fiddleford nodded. As the two got into the Stanmobile he knew Stan didn’t believe his words. It made Fiddleford realize that Stan didn’t talk much about what he’d done when he had gotten kicked out. And that Stan wouldn’t be okay, but he would be. Fiddleford would make sure of that.

_____________________

Stan opened his eyes, his vision was blurry. God, he had the worst headache. When his vision cleared he found that he was surrounded by a group of people in red cloaks. They had an eye on the hood of them with an eye crossed out with an X.

He stared at them. How did he get here? He remembered falling asleep in the car, leaning his head on Fiddlefords- Fiddleford. Where was he?

He began to struggle in his restraints, but they were chains.

One of the people stepped forward. “Cease your struggling. You’ll leave soon and be back in bed soon like nothing happened.”

He kept struggling. “Where is he?! Where is Fiddleford?!”

The figure stared at him, the others looked between one another.

The one who had stepped forward turned back to them. “Leave us.”

The other people walked out of the room leaving Stan and the figure alone.

He glared at him. “Where is he?”

The figure stared down at him. “You’ll see him very soon.”

Stan struggled against his restraints, and watched as the figure pulled out a weird contraption that looked like a gun, with a light bulb on the end of it.

His eyes widened. “What is that?”

The figure refused to answer and approached him.

Once he was close enough Stan kicked them, causing the hood to fall.

His eyes widened at the face he saw.

“Fiddleford?”

Fiddleford rubbed the back of his head, but stood again.

“Stanley…”

“What’s going on?”

Fiddleford came over to him, and knely down so he was meeting his eyes.

“You don’t need to worry. We’ll be back home soon, I just need to finish this up.”

Stanley stared at him. “I don’t understand. What’s going on, explain it to me. I at least deserve that.”

Fiddleford hesitated. “I don’t think you’ll like the truth.”

Stan glared. “I don’t give a fuck! I deserve to know what’s going on!”

Fiddleford frowned. “Okay. Stanley, I’m going to help you. I’m gonna make you forget everything your father did to you. Everything I know that he did to you at least.”

Stan stared at him, confused. “What? What are you talking about?”

Fiddleford smiled. “I created something, something that can help people who need to forget. Much to Ford’s protests, I didn’t destroy it. I’ve been helping the people of the town, and now I’ll help you.”

Fuck. What have I gotten myself into? Just who am I in love with?

Fiddleford caressed his cheek. “It’ll be okay. It’s just a slight pain and then you’ll be asleep. When you wake up everything will feel fine.”

Stan stared at him. “I don’t want this. I don’t want to forget.”

Fiddleford frowned. “Stanley, it’ll be better this way. I’m trying to help you, I don’t want you to look down on yourself anymore. I don’t want you to remember all the pain you went through. I want you to be okay.”

Stan shook his head. “I understand that, but I don’t want to forget everything that happened. I don’t want that.”

Fiddleford tilted his head. “Why? Why do you want to keep those memories?”

Stan didn’t have an answer to that.

When he didn’t say anything Fiddleford stood up. “If you don’t have an answer then I’ll go along with this. Don’t worry Stanley, we'll be home soon.”

Stan shook his head. “Fidds, please don’t do this.”

Fiddleford typed something into the gun. “Hon, it’s gonna be fine. You’ll be okay.”

Stan struggled more in his restraints refusing to look at Fiddleford. He felt something lock his head and legs in place so he couldn’t move it.

He looked at Fiddleford who came forwards and placed his hand over Stan’s.

“It’s gonna be okay.”

Stan wanted to say something, anything to convince the man he loved not to do this. Not to take his memories, but he couldn’t think of anything.

He saw a bright flash, and then felt a searing amount of pain. It was almost the worst feeling he’d ever felt. Almost.

He cried out, the tears making their way down his face.

He felt the restraints unlocked and felt someone take him into their arms.

He felt his memories of his father, the bad experiences slowly fade away.

He felt someone run their fingers through his hair, he felt someone press a kiss to his forehead.

“Shhh, it’s okay. It’s all gonna be okay. The pain will pass, it’s alright, it’s alright.”

His screams died out, his consiousness dulled, and then he was fast asleep.

Fiddleford stared down at the man he was cradling as he stood. He carded his fingers through his thick brown hair.

He went into the room with the others, dismissing them. Telling them they did a good thing today, like always.

He changed out of his robes and then went out to the Stanmobile. He looked over at Stan’s sleeping face, and brushed some hair to the side.

He pressed a tender kiss to his forehead. “Oh Stanley, my Stanley. I love you. I won’t let anything hurt you again, not even your own memories.”