Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

“Meow”

“I know dusty but we have no choice” Kat sighs as she turns away from her tiny companion and towards the door to the apartment that has been at the back of her mind for the last three years. She doesn't even know if her old friend will be happy to see her after all this time but she doesn't have much choice. All her other options went out the window over the last three years but getting married and having kids or moving to places that don't accept pets.

Kat chews at her lip as she thinks about if it's not too late to get a hotel or find another disused pipe to move into. But the thought of her being a coward makes her stomach churn and she can't bear the thought of that any longer so she swallows her pride and knocks once-.

Then the door opens immediately and she's greeted by the sight of the girl she hasn't seen in three years.

Long black hair that leads into thick vibrant red ends, pale skin that reminds her of vibrant moon light, that tattoo peeking out of her cleavage that mixes both the sun and moon that she never heard the story of his she got even after so many years they've known each other. Those gleaming eyes of cyan that burrow into her soul like a scorned lover about to dismember their terrified spouse.

Kat can't help but swallow the lump in her throat as she tries to calm raven down. 

“I'm sorry for not staying in contact all these years and you deserve better than what I've given you sachya and-”

“Shut. Up .” Raven's voice is tense and harsh and gives her no room for argument so she closes her mouth and nods.

“Don't call me that again” raven moves to the side and crosses her arms 

“Come in.” Kat is confused by what raven said. 

“Why?”

“Now.” kat decides to listen to what Raven says because she's probably upset at her and she doesn't want to make her angry at her, she really needs a place to stay. 

After she comes in and dusty follows her raven closes the door behind her before walking and she follows her to the kitchen until she stops at a table. 

“Sit” kat gives her a confused look until Raven pulls out one of the two table chairs for her before stepping away towards the fridge. She decides to listen to her friend and sits in the chair cautiously despite the worry she feels about what Raven is doing.

“Raven, what are you doing?” 

“Cooking you food, you haven't eaten have you” Kat is confused again and shakes her head. 

“No i haven't but you don't have to rave im fine-”

“Meow!”

‘Yes dusty I'll feed you too” when raven says the name dusty she knows something's wrong. 

“How do you know dustys name? I got him after I left.” there's a sudden drop in silence as a knife cuts through one of the vegetables and raven goes completely still for a long time.

Kat feels her anxiety spiking every second that taven doesn't answer and she can feel her fight or flight response beginning to kick in and she doesn't want to hurt raven if something happens. 

“Raven, how do you know-?”

“Cecie” the name of her close friend fills her with confusion and more questions.

“Cecie?”

“Yes, ive-, I've been talking to cecie ever since you two moved in together and agreed even told me about your socials, that's how i know i asked cecie not to say anything unless you asked about me but you never did” raven goes back to chopping vegetables and preparing food as kat processes what she just heard.

Raven has known about her for the last few years and what she's been doing yet she hasnt even tried once to keep up with what's been going on in ravens life. She feels her stomach sink. 

She's a terrible friend, a terrible ‘mate’

That word tastes sour in her mouth and she hasn't earned to call herself that even if fate says she belongs with raven she doesn't feel like she's good enough. 

She buries that knowledge and those memories away because only she knows that and Raven doesn't, Raven can't ever know. 

She decides to sit quietly as she watches raven work at the stove.

”Hey where's xii?” 

“Sleeping”

Kat sighs as she contemplates pulling out her phone or not but as she thinks about it she starts to think about which socials raven has seen.

“Hey Raven, which of my socials do you follow?”

“All of them”

‘All of them’ kat blushes as she quickly opens up her phone and goes to where she uploads her coplays and looks through them as she does the thought of raven of all people seeing her in these makes her blush madly. 

“Um you wouldn't happen to have-” 

“I think you look cute as a maid kat id hire you in a heartbeat” there's a loud thunk as kat hits her head against the table.

Why did raven of all people have to see them? Well she guesses it's better than newt and echo finding out, they have enough to worry about with the kid, kids? She really needs to catch up with everyone. 

Well now she has to put up with her soulmate knowing about her hobby. 

The thought of the alpha girl pleasuring herself to one of her pictures fills her with something gleeful and possessive before she bites it down and shoves it away. 

Why am I thinking about these things?

“I think i need to go out for some air Raven I'll go downstairs-”

*Clang!* The sound of the knife raven was using suddenly burying itself deep into the surface of where she was cutting rings throughout the air and it makes kats heart thump aggressively.

“Theres no need i have a balcony” kat nods as her nerves begin to fray and she gets up to go out side because she really needs to take in some fresh air. 

After calming her nerves enough she decides to go back inside and take in the fresh smell of food cooking.

“Um raven i think that's too much for me to eat” she stares at the way too large meal that raven made. 

“It's fine we can eat the rest over the next few days” kat looks at the yummy food until that sentence finally rings some alarm bells in her head. 

“Next few days, how do you know I'll be coming here?”

“Because you're going to be living here kat” raven says sternly almost like it's a command. Kat goes through a few different expressions before landing on confusion.

“What, why? Why are you saying I'm going to be living here?” 

“Because you're looking for a place to live and have nowhere else to go” kats eyes narrow at ravens words. 

“How do you know I have nowhere to go?” she looks at her friend skeptically as suspicion fills her chest. 

“Newt, echo,aki and Pandora and even syd have all called me and told me you're looking for a place to live and i know your old house was taken over by the city and turned into a functioning pipe long ago” kat feels herself deflate as she sighs in defeat. 

“Fine i need a place to live raven could i please, maybe, stay here, at least for a little while” raven finally lets the tension she's been carrying all this time ever since she opened the door out and kat finally smells her scent and oh! It's so beautiful. 

Asphodel, chrysanthemums and sweet apples. Kat has to bite her tongue to keep herself from reacting too much to ravens scent but judging by the alpha girls reaction her own scent must have spiked with desire the moment she smelled ravens scent.

She tries to distract raven from prodding at this subject by distracting her.

“Let's eat! I'm hungry. I don't think I've eaten since I left Cecies place!” although true she knows its a low blow to play on ravens alpha instincts to take care of her to keep that conversation from happening and it works as raven begins to serve them both food and she quickly digs in so she doesn't have to talk. 

“This is your room kat” ravens leads her to a bedroom before opening the door and when it opens she smiles because it's a perfect room that has everything she needs to start working already. There's a desk, with a small computer on it that's a few years old a bed that's been kept well maintained, a cat bed that dusty immediately likes and goes to sit in… the old dust covered camera set she use to always talk about wanting when her and raven hung out before she left… the fashion magazines that she…that she used to read and…

Soulmate rings through her head and she realizes she hasn't been the only one suffering because of the decision she made. 

She's been waiting for her all this time, that's why there are two of everything in this apartment. Even if Raven doesn't know she's her soulmate she can feel it and she's been living her life like this because of her, because she ran from her.

Because she's still running from her.

“I'm sorry if it's creepy i just bought most of these things years ago and i didn't do anything with them because-” Kat drops her bag before turning around and hugging her soulmate.

“I'm sorry for leaving you, it was wrong of me to do that and i never should have done it” raven just hugs her back.

“You know it's not your fault that you left kat you don't have to blame yourself you were just doing what you thought was right” but kats grip on her back tightens until it hurts. 

“No! That's not why I left. I'm sorry I should have told you sooner!” kat feels her eyes tearing up because this lie should have never have happened and it would have saved the both of them so much pain. 

“I didn't go because I thought it was a good cause! I did it because i was scared of getting too close to you!” ravens comforting strokes begin to stop and she pulls away to look at her in those burning red eyes of hers.

“What do you mean?”

“I'm-” kats voice breaks and cracks as she feels her emotions becoming too much for her and she starts to begin to break down. 

“We're-, we're soulmates raven” and kat feels her heart begin to hurt as she looks at the expression on ravens face as she processes this information and the last three years of their life and what it all means.

Chapter Text

“We're-, we're soulmates raven” kat feels her heart begin to hurt as she looks at the expression on ravens face as she processes this information and the last three years of their life and what it all means for them both.

She sees sadness and pain fill ravens eyes as hints of joy peek out of the corner, mixing with everything else to make a blurry mess as tears begin to fill her eyes. Ravens grip on her feels loose and weak and she feels herself desperately wishing she would pull the other girl closer to herself but she hasn't earned that right. Ravens lips tremble as she speaks. 

“How long-, how long have you known? How have you known?” kat prepares herself for the worst news she's going to have to deliver. 

“I've known before we even met” she feels ravens seems pull away from her as she slams the door to the bedroom close and tears roll down her face as her voice finally breaks as she lets all the pain that's been building up inside her out.

“You've known all this damn time for all these years kat and you still chose to leave me?!” kat feels her fists clench tightly as her heart thumps loudly in her ears and raven notices it too and goes to the bed that's supposed to be hers before taking a pillow and burying her face into and screaming into it. 

Kats thankful for it until she begins to hear ravens screaming turn to pained sobs and she knows she can't avoid this even if it makes her uncomfortable she's going to have to face what she's done and the consequences it brings with all she's got. 

She sits next to Raven on the bed and is hesitant to touch her in case she gets upset at her and instead uses her scent to do it. She puts out calming pheremones to soothe her friend, her soulmate. She needs to accept that even if it makes her uncomfortable because it also affects Raven as well.

She decides to make a promise to Raven and never keep anything from her again no matter what it is or how painful it is. 

“Raven I promise you I'll never run away from you ever again and I'll tell you everything I know from now on no matter what it is” Raven pulls herself out from the pillow and looks at her with reddened eyes and a tear covered face and sniffles.

“Everything?” the way Raven says that already tells her what she's going to ask about.

“Yes, even about what happened there” she sees raven's eyes turn down and away the moment her body tenses but then she smells her scent return again and Raven moves the pillow away before climbing towards her.

“Later kat right now i just want to hold you” kat is confused until raven climbs onto her and pulls her into her arms before they fall onto the bed together.

“Raven!” Kat yelps and blushes as they both fall together and raven pulls her possessively into her chest like she belongs to her. “Raven, this is embarrassing!”

“Too bad you know how long I've wanted to hold you like this? Well you said it yourself were soulmates not i get to finally do what I've always wanted to do” kat blushes a deep red.

“B-but there are platonic soulmates too!”

But the moment those words leave her lips raven turns them around before pining kat possessively beneath her with her arms on each side of her head. Kat can't help but stare at the deep want in those blue eyes that are only for her.

“There is nothing platonic about what i want with you kat” then raven moves forward and she feels her heart jump because she thinks she's going to kiss her but instead raven just presses their foreheads together and lets out a breathy sigh.

“I want to do so much with you kat but only if you're comfortable with it i won't force you to do anything you don't want i promise i don't want to hurt you, i love you so much and i want you to feel the same someday even if that may never happen” raven closes her eyes as she presses her face into her neck. Kat can't help the thoughts of marking and claiming that go through her head when Raven does that just like the thoughts of kissing her won't leave mind after having her so close like that. 

Kat wraps her arms around raven and pulls her close just like Raven wants and she secretly desires. She knows that platonic soulmates things is true but she just said it as an excuse because she's still scared of being in love with raven. She was fine with being ravens soulmate; it wasn't until she fell in love with her that she became scared.

They fall asleep in each other's arms and not wanting to admit it, it's the best sleep she's ever gotten since she left. Kat knows it's because it's her inner omega missing her one true mate and that alot if things feel better when ravens around. Even simply breathing feels like it's better than before and it makes her feel even worse that she ran and missed all this warmth, this happiness and exchanged it for pain and misery and bad memories.

It's only been half a day and as she finishes setting everything up on the small computer raven had bought for her three years ago because she was planning on asking her to move in with her to the apartment that specifically had two bedrooms. She knows why raven did it, ravens been in love with her for a long time and probably had plans to confess to her and for them to move in together. But she ran away before she did and she hurt her so much by doing so, but she's thankful she didn't break her heart and that raven never gave up on her even though she should have.

She knows raven deserves better but she can't give her anyone better, there's only her and no one else. So she has to do her very best for Raven and herself going forward. Ss she finishes setting up everything and she finally has access to her socials again she begins to upload some of the pictures she took. 

Picture of drainage pipe/kats old home: some people have no respect for people's property. 😡 

Comments:  

Didn't that pipe belong to the city first? 

Girl you lived there? 

What are you a rat? 

Now you're going to have to become a fish! 

She huffs at the rude and insensitive comments as she uploads her next picture.

Picture of newt and echo playing with their three year old child: catching up with some old friends, somethings don't stay the same after so many years.

Comments: 

Aww, da baby

Milf!

Idiot! 

Dilf!

Someone ban these idiots. 

I miss my parents. 

I don't have any parents. 

TMI.

Kat deletes a few comments and reports a few people before moving on to her next picture, one that's going to cement everything in her life going forward. Hey hands hesitate for a moment before she types her comment.

Picture of her and raven cuddling in bed as she presses a kiss to ravens sleeping cheek: just reunited with my soulmate and vowed to never leave their side ever again.

Comments:  

Soulmate!!!!???

Why are all the hot girls hooking up together? 

When can we expect pups?

Who wears the collar in the relationship? My money's on the blonde one.

@cai: congratulations auntie alua we knew you could do it someday. 

She stops reading her comments and immediately clicks on the last one before reporting it for harassment.

After she's done she closes her computer because she lost all her energy to upload the rest of her pictures and just wants to go to bed. But the message that was sent to her gnaws at her brain and she can't help but think of raven’s calming presence when she they slept together earlier.

So she does something brash and stupid and she goes to ravens room and walks inside to find her feeding xii.

“Kat what is it?” xii flaps their wings at her as it eats more food from ravens hand. Kat takes a deep breath and decides to be brave for once. 

“I wanted to, to come and spend some time with-, i wanted to cuddl-, to sleep with, no um, can we do what we did, the thing from earlier where we slept in each other's arms, yeah that” kat feels her cheeks turning red in embarrassment from the fool she's making of herself. 

“Sure kat I'll just finish feeding xii and then we can sleep for a little while together” kat bites her tongue because she didn't get her point across at all. 

“I meant the whole night Raven” when taven hears that she turns to face her. 

“Did something happen, kat?” she knows she can't hide anything anymore so she decides to tell her what she's comfortable with for now.

“I just read a comment that made me really uncomfortable and I would feel better if you held me like earlier raven” raven nods at her as she finishes feeding xii.

“I'll clean my hands and then I'll go to your run okay?”

“Actually i wanted to be in your room tonight” ravens expression turns a bit hesitant as if she is going to ask if she's sure but then it fades away. 

“Okay kat if that's what you want”

After raven cleans her hands off she guides kat to her bed and she lets herself become comfortable in it before doing anything else. 

“Are you comfortable enough?” Kat can't help but say no. 

“No not yet you're still apart from me” raven blushes as she holds out her arms for kat to come to her and kat doesn't hesitate as she gives into her feelings and glomps onto Raven.

“Oof!” she can't help but smile at the sound raven makes as her arms wrap around her and she buries herself deep into ravens neck. She inhales her scent and feels a warmth in her chest.

“Kat?”

“Yes raven?”

“You're purring” she blushes and tries to pull away but raven pulls her back.

“No it's fine kat i wasn't complaining i like it i think it's cute and suits you” kat can't help but preen because it's her mate that says that. She snuggles into her soulmate and she feels a sense of calmness she's always been missing. 

“I missed you Raven.”

“I missed you too kat” she blushes as raven presses a kiss to her cheek as they lie down to sleep together.